What's your relationship like?
We have rough patches but we make up quickly and try and solve the issues together.
When you say solve it, does it involve you giving in most of the time?
Who does most of the childcare?
We share the childcare pretty equally, I'm starting a business from home so I'm around the kids a lot.
How many hours do you spend on the business a day?
If it's like a full time job, you should not be doing 50% of the child care, but you should be doing a fair amount based on how much you work and particularly in the evenings. If you do more then your fair share she will take you for granted.
Who does most of the housework?
My wife did most (but not all) of the housework until we had a recent bust up about it. Now we share all the chores equally.
If your hours on the business are small then I think it's fine to do more housework, however if they are genuinely normal business hours then it should be fair, you should do some things but not more then your fair share.
If you were doing none it can build resentment, plus lead her to treat you like another child who needs taking care of, that's not good. There needs to be balance and you need to take care of chores not for your wife but because you are an adult and responsible adults pitch in and do their fair share. That is attractive.
Do you both work outside the home?
No we are both in the home, I'm working on the business. She doesn't work but goes once a week to university part time.
Are you genuinely working hard? No video games etc?
If so then unless your wife is at uni or studying she needs to do her fair share too. Do not allow her to slack off either.
Does your wife nag you?
Yes, this is what led to some arguments recently. My wife does tend to nag me quite a lot about household stuff and when I do help out I often get told I'm doing stuff wrong. We had a big shouting match but since then (about 3 weeks ago) we have divided up all the chores equally.
Yes the nagging is bad. If I have to"nag" someone it means they aren't being responsible. So make sure you aren't another child and that you get the stuff that needs to be done, done without her having to nag.
Also do not be afraid to stand up for your self, but make sure you are being fair.
It helps if you stay even tempered and refuse to engage with your wife when she is yelling.
A man who knows what he wants and goes for it is sexy, one who takes care of his wife and children and puts the family first without being told to, but also cares for himself and isn't a door mat. You have to get the balance right.
Also is your health good? And how is your wifes health?