Wife suddenly wants me to get circumcised...I think this is ridiculous - Page 7 - Talk About Marriage
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post #91 of 193 (permalink) Old 02-10-2013, 07:32 PM
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Re: Wife suddenly wants me to get circumcised...I think this is ridiculous

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I wouldn't say so..Yes I was pissed off about the lack of anal sex.But I don't think she would try to "retaliate" in this way.
Pissed off? Mild understatement. You believed you were ENTITLED to it...to the point that you had actually entertained the idea of seeing a prostitute just to get what you wanted. Fortunately, you didn't go through with that, or if you did, you never posted about it. And never brought THAT subject up to her either. She probably would have cut it off right then and there, had you said you were going to pay for it, just to have your way!

Jack, there are a few of your threads I have seen no resolution to... just...trailed off/abandoned. Have you come clean to her about your "happy ending" lap dance?
Did you ever decide what was being done with her sister's child (did you adopt her or let her go into foster care)? Ummm... oh, and your issue with "lasting"... I saw a couple of threads about this. One was asking if having more sex would really help you last longer, I believe. So, did ANY of those issues ever get resolved? And is MIL still living with you guys?

You can use the 2x4 without adding nails to it.
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post #92 of 193 (permalink) Old 02-10-2013, 07:46 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Wife suddenly wants me to get circumcised...I think this is ridiculous

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Just curious "Jack" there are posts referring to you previously wanting anal sex with spouse and it no going over well. My husband is uncircumsized also and anal sex was quite frankly..oww..oww.. and double oww at first. He is large to start with and longer than most...that extra skin makes him even thicker. Extra lube and take slow at first and now it is very enjoyable.

I would recommend you sit down with her and dicuss both issues. If ypu are not comfortable with getting cut tell her. Ask her why she would ask and that it offended you. Comunication...communication.
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Well we actually discussed the anal issue at length.I still feel the way I feel,but there's no point in us keep to discuss when she already said no....There were some arguments that resulted from my anal sex requests and it was the beginning of a rough patch.We are doing better now.Some have suggested that my wife is trying to "punish"me by getting me circumcised...I don't think this is the case.I don't think she is still all that upset over me bugging her about the anal sex....She doesn't have a history of trying to "get me back"when I do something she doesn't like....
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post #93 of 193 (permalink) Old 02-10-2013, 08:05 PM
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So how did she ask the question...was it just in passing or was it a request for you to setup the appointment? My husband has complained a lot about he wishes he had been circumcised. ..cleanliness is a real issue, it is very easy to get bacterial rashes when not circumsized. I asked him once if he ever really considered it...said "heck no to painful". That was the end if the conversation...I wasn't asking cause I wanted him to do it done was just wondering it really bothered him.
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post #94 of 193 (permalink) Old 02-10-2013, 08:48 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Wife suddenly wants me to get circumcised...I think this is ridiculous

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Jack, there are a few of your threads I have seen no resolution to... just...trailed off/abandoned. Have you come clean to her about your "happy ending" lap dance?
Did you ever decide what was being done with her sister's child (did you adopt her or let her go into foster care)? Ummm... oh, and your issue with "lasting"... I saw a couple of threads about this. One was asking if having more sex would really help you last longer, I believe. So, did ANY of those issues ever get resolved? And is MIL still living with you guys?
Unfortunately the child has been placed in foster care.It was somewhat of a mutual decision.And I'm still dealing with the premature ejaculation,and we aren't having sex everyday as I was talking about in the other thread.Mother in law still lives with us and it makes the sex kind of awkward, as I feared would be the case.But it is still good.
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post #95 of 193 (permalink) Old 02-10-2013, 08:56 PM
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Re: Wife suddenly wants me to get circumcised...I think this is ridiculous

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So how did she ask the question...was it just in passing or was it a request for you to setup the appointment? My husband has complained a lot about he wishes he had been circumcised. ..cleanliness is a real issue, it is very easy to get bacterial rashes when not circumsized. I asked him once if he ever really considered it...said "heck no to painful". That was the end if the conversation...I wasn't asking cause I wanted him to do it done was just wondering it really bothered him.
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OMG really? How has our species survived for millions of years? How do the billions of men in the world survive that have not been subjected to MGM ? Why don't all the other species with forskin get all these bacterial rashes? My dog must have better hygiene.


My favorite joke:

Why do dogs lick their balls?

Because they can.

Sounds like your husband could use more oral. or a yoga class.

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post #96 of 193 (permalink) Old 02-10-2013, 08:59 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Wife suddenly wants me to get circumcised...I think this is ridiculous

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Fortunately, you didn't go through with that, or if you did, you never posted about it. And never brought THAT subject up to her either. She probably would have cut it off right then and there, had you said you were going to pay for it, just to have your way!

Have you come clean to her about your "happy ending" lap dance?
Well I didn't tell her about those things because it would have been very foolish to do so.We were trying to work things out.That would have been maybe the dumbest thing I could do.I doubt we would have made the progress we've made in the last month or so if she had known these things.And she was just saying something last week to her friend about how she doesn't understand why married men go to strip clubs,so of course I wasn't going to bring that up.
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post #97 of 193 (permalink) Old 02-10-2013, 11:53 PM
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Re: Wife suddenly wants me to get circumcised...I think this is ridiculous

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You have ignored that fact that FGM is equivalent to cutting off a manís dVck so that he cannot enjoy sex. That's quite a bit different than cutting off lose skin.
Your analogy doesn't hold. A woman who suffered through FGM still might have some enjoyment, and can conceive a child through PIV sex.

A man without a penis can't do either.
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post #98 of 193 (permalink) Old 02-11-2013, 04:28 AM
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Re: Wife suddenly wants me to get circumcised...I think this is ridiculous

sorry Jack for the thread jack and I'm with everyone else on the advise that you should only EVER do it if it was your OWN decision to do so.
As for the rest of the debate, I'm chiming in not to say one is less worrisome than another - just a few observations I've made on this matter. A few posters seem quite traumatized and emotionally moved about the issue and I have no right to judge that.

For some reason many forms of society/religion have advocated that male circumcision = more accepted and favourable. I come from a religion that neither advocates nor dismisses it so I'd say to each his own...
However, I must say that I stand by the observation that many more circumcised men I've seen seem generally less traumatized in adolescence/adulthood by the procedure (unless they had a medical nightmare) than the women who've had to undergo FGM.

I think most of it comes down to how the procedures are carried out. In the western world, I'm guessing that many of the circumcision procedures are carried out under sedation by the expertise of a medical professional in hospitals. On the other hand, I assume FGM is not carried out in hospitals since its illegal.
I am aware that this is not the case for many young boys in the underdeveloped world and I feel they must undergo exactly the same trauma as a girl undergoing FGM.

However, I have never seen any reports where girls have ever had the luxury of sedation and hospital wards for their FGM. The only videos I've seen of FGM are of 7-12 year old girls being forcefully pinned down by their female family members while an older lady does extremely crude painful stuff down there.

If done medically and with some respect for the child undergoing it (for whatever reasons - religious or otherwise) such practices would definitely reduce trauma to the child by leaps and bounds, but not everyone world over seems to want to do it that way. Some scary looking older adult using a crude unhygienic knife and needle on you without any form of painkillers/sedation while everyone else in your family pins you down is the worst form of child abuse (in my books) - whether the child is a boy or a girl.
I think the reason this debate springs up is because in the bigger picture, a percentage of male boys circumcised are subjected to it in this crude manner while most (if not all) girls subjected to FGM have to undergo FGM very agonizingly.

Having said this, one must also agree that the reasons behind circumcision or FGM have age old chauvinistic reasons behind them.
The boys being circumcised are being done so in the apparent hope that they could go on to have a better/more hygienic sexual life in future.
The girl's genitals being mutilated are so that she doesn't become promiscuous or develop sexual feelings as its sinful to do so for her in general.
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post #99 of 193 (permalink) Old 02-11-2013, 08:56 AM
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Re: Wife suddenly wants me to get circumcised...I think this is ridiculous

Zig, I respect your thoughtful post but I have issues with several of your points.

As many state the forskin is not just some unnecessary loose skin. It is a protective shield for the naturally mucus membrane called the glands. When it is removed it fundamentally changes the nature of the glands. It essentially dries up, and becomes more like normal skin with less sensitivity. Ever had dry toung? This loss of sensitivity may be a benefit for PE in you 20s and 30s, but becomes a huge problem in your 40s and beyond. It takes more and more pressure and friction to excite those nerve endings. Unless a women is very consistent with kegels the vagina is just not tight enough to provide the necessary stimulation. This is one of several reasons many men begin to prefer masturbation, anal and find the need for more intense and psychologically stimulating sex acts. Good old PIV just doesn't cut it anymore like it used to.

It is not common practice to use effective anesthesia on newborn infants in the US for several reasons. Topical is not very effective and general anesthesia is very risky especially for a newborn. The procedure costs money and insurance companies don't want to pay for it. The medical community has been under intense pressure recently to change its scientific stance and "recommend" MGM, because insurance companies increasingly will not pay for the procedure because it is not medically necessary.

Sure the the physical pain caused by MGM is barbaric because it is so unnecessary except in rare cases, but getting squeezed out of a garden hose is not very comfortable either. The bigger issue is the trauma caused later in life that your sexual organs were mutalated causing disfunction AGAINST YOUR WILL. By people making a PROFIT off your suffering. You cannot deny the profit motive for hospitals in the US and religous leaders generally do not charge explicit fees for their services, but "tokens of appreciation" are expected. The accepted practice of hospitals selling the forskin to tissue brokers can also not be denied.

All in all the deck is fairly stacked against a male infant, at least in the US.

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post #100 of 193 (permalink) Old 02-11-2013, 09:21 AM
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Re: Wife suddenly wants me to get circumcised...I think this is ridiculous

yes... If the procedure is being carried out in ways that do not involve basic integrity -ie. done by medical professionals, with use of sedation and basic privacy for the child involved...then its barbaric - be it girl or boy... and I'm guessing it would be equally painful for both...

I am not aware of how much sedation they use for infants in hospitals since anaesthesia is used on newborns & neonates during other medical procedures/surgeries etc....

as for whether its necessary/beneficial or not... I personally dont have an opinion on it...I'd leave it to individual choice
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post #101 of 193 (permalink) Old 02-11-2013, 11:33 AM
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Re: Wife suddenly wants me to get circumcised...I think this is ridiculous

No woman will ever come between my foreskin and me.

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post #102 of 193 (permalink) Old 02-11-2013, 11:54 AM
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Re: Wife suddenly wants me to get circumcised...I think this is ridiculous

Jack I,

I think it's really silly of her to ask you to get circumcised after she's been having sex with you all these years uncircumcised. What were the circumstances under which she asked?

I personally am not at all attracted to the look of uncircumcised penises, and that could be the case for her as well but I doubt it since she married you "un-cut".
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post #103 of 193 (permalink) Old 02-11-2013, 02:04 PM
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Re: Wife suddenly wants me to get circumcised...I think this is ridiculous

Can we stop the thread hijack? A link has been provided for the thread with a debate about the propriety of circumcision. How about staying on topic? For all those who want to argue about whether circumcision should ever be performed, go over to that topic.

Even taking into account all of the OP's prior threads, which displayed a striking cluelessness regarding relationships, the answer to this one is easy: No circumcision unless there is a compelling medical reason.

And yes, there can be compelling medical reasons. One of our sons is uncircumcised and the other was circumcised at a few months because of a raging penile infection.

But we've heard of no compelling reason here.
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post #104 of 193 (permalink) Old 02-11-2013, 03:05 PM
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Re: Wife suddenly wants me to get circumcised...I think this is ridiculous

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My wife and I have been married for 6 years.She never has told me she has a problem with my uncircumcised penis.Yesterday she asked,"Do you ever think about getting circumcised"?And the discussion went on.It seems she doesn't like my uncircumcised penis.I've done a lot of reading online about this today.A study actually said that circumcision removes 20,000 nerve endings from the penis.And it is widely reported that uncircumcised men have more sensitivity.Im upset and confused.I do not want to get circumcised.My wife actually claimed to have told me this before.Her brother got circumcised years ago,and she claims to have talked to me about getting circumcised when she told me about her brother.That had to have been a one sentence or something of that nature and not a full conversation because I would have remembered it.So do any men have experiences with their wives wanting them to get circumcised?Any women prefer an uncircumcised penis?Why?Have you ever told a man you wanted him to get circumcised?
The question I have is to you make sure you keep your package very clean? That was one reason my wife did not like uncircumcised men. Which when were dating was more common than cut men like myself. My DW also for some reason liked the look of a cut man.

Contrary to the notion of sensitivity loss, some men find it to be better sensitivity, all depends on foreskin. I think you need to find out the root reason why your wife may want to you to get cut.

Americans went from being uncut, to cut to now the norm seem uncut. Only reason I have read about this is my DIL both did not want grandsons cut. I read up on it out of my own curiosity. It seems a very interesting debate as to pro and con of either or option.
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post #105 of 193 (permalink) Old 02-11-2013, 03:10 PM
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Re: Wife suddenly wants me to get circumcised...I think this is ridiculous

Apparently he is, based on his reply. I already asked

It's not the cheese, then again, who the heck would admit even on a forum he's got cheese down there lol
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