Four months later no change dispite the effort put forth getting close to making the final call on this deal.
You are having much bigger issues than this child.
The problem here is not the child, it is your resentment to your woman.
You are resenting your woman for putting the child in the bed and keeping her there killing the sex opportunity.
Instead of resenting your woman for this, you should have been the man to insist this was corrected years ago. Your wife may not even realize this outright, but inside her she is feeling if she was important enough to you, you would have been the man enough to have fixed this.
Now your woman is thinking you are not attracted to her, and she is right. This is further motivating her to NOT remove the child, because the child is a good excuse not to confront the real issue.
To fix this, be the man to kill the resentment in yourself to your woman by doing what you need to do, that is insist the child is put properly in her own sleeping space.
When you do this, your woman will realize she is important enough to you for your to stand and be the man, and this will light a blazing fire of attraction toward you.
I wish you well.