Do men think "Down There" on a woman is gross?

Blaze · 09-15-2009, 11:52 PM

Hello! - Newbie here.

Before I introduce myself completely and spill my (long) story, I have a question (that pertains to my situation) that I really need answered soon.

Brief background: In my 20 years of marriage, husband has touched me with his hands "down there" perhaps 5 times. Only once orally. He is clearly turned off by a woman's lower anatomy and moisture. Often he loses his (shall we say) "momentum" if his hand touches me there (with exception to guiding himself into me during intercourse). He has very little idea what my anatomy is like "there" other than where his male bits meant to naturally seek out. When I've tried (repeatedly) to encourage him to touch me with his hands (not asking for oral; heaven forbid), he says he is turned off by a woman's moisture and scent, is grossed out with the thought of touching anything in that region. He states it wouldn't matter who it was, he doesn't want to put his hands there. He says he knows "for a fact" that most men don't like that part of a woman. Somehow I doubt that, but that's his excuse to me. I need to know if this is true. In the meantime, after 20 years of not being touched - I'm going positively mad.

So here's the question.... Do men think "down there" on a woman is a turn off?

***(PS.. Newbie here. Didn't mean to blind anyone with the bold print originally. My bad, sorry.)

voivod · 09-16-2009, 12:23 AM

no. but i'm not him, and i've never seen/etc. yours.

fyi-i'm repulsed by mayonaisse. everyone i know thinks i'm nuts.

pairofduces · 09-16-2009, 01:59 AM

Love it down there. I could spend hours...

chuckf75 · 09-16-2009, 08:05 AM

I love it "down there" and have become an "expert" at it because of this. My wife was a little cautious about me doing this to her at first but now is addicted to it. What about starting this in the shower where he can see how clean and lovely it is???

Blonddeee · 09-16-2009, 08:41 AM

My ex-h was like that. Since I left, I've dated a guy that is all he wanted to do was do that... it depends on the guy- I think most guys like it there... hopefully- I felt it was selfish of my ex not to be concerned with trying to please me. I'm not going to be with someone that doesn't enjoy that ever again...

michzz · 09-16-2009, 08:45 AM

Your H is unusual. I'd say he has some issues for sure. Most heterosexual men are enthusiastic about it.

okeydokie · 09-16-2009, 08:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by michzz

Your H is unusual. I'd say he has some issues for sure. Most heterosexual men are enthusiastic about it.

oh, and thanks for the large bold print, i had to take off my glasses to avoid a headache

Amplexor · 09-16-2009, 08:53 AM

I love it, your husband is missing out. Has he ever discussed something in his past that turned him off to it? If he "knows for a fact" that most men don't like it then he has a unique set of friends.

Amplexor · 09-16-2009, 08:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by okeydokie

oh, and thanks for the large bold print, i had to take off my glasses to avoid a headache

I took mine off because it was nice to be able to read without them.

hubby · 09-16-2009, 09:10 AM

Blaze,
I am on the opposite side from you. I would love to spend hours down there, looking, tasting, feeling, and making her scream. However, I have not been able to do that for my wife since before we were married. Granted, we have had a pretty much sexless marriage for 11 years but now we have picked up the pace and we are making up for lost time. Still, however, she has not let me go down on her. She will give me a BJ 3 times a week but I have not been able to return the favor. I think it is a combination of a few things:

-Did not know what the hell I was doing when she let me do it. Did not even know where the clit or G spot was. Thought it was just lick and insert finger, silly teenager. Probably frustrated the hell out of her.

-She is a self conscious and shy person when it comes to this. But, I have noticed that she has starting trimming her lady parts which is REALLY HOT. So I think she might be coming around, so to speak.

-She does not O easily and is probably worried that she will not be able to O and I might get frustrated myself not being able to give her an O.

-She is generally a pretty stressful/anxious person and will not let herself relax enough to O. We probably need to have an overnight away from the kids for the first time. We have one planned in a month or so.

Any suggestions for the guy who wants to please his wife but his wife will not give him the opportunity?

Good luck Blaze, I do not know too many men who would pass up the opportunity to go down.

Mommybean · 09-16-2009, 09:11 AM

It sounds like he was brought up to believe that sexuality is dirty somehow. My H thinks "that part" of my body is beautiful, and jumps at every opportuinty he has to explore it. Your H is wrong in saying that how he feels is how most men feel; its my experience that he is definitely in the minority with that train of thought.

Blaze · 09-16-2009, 09:40 AM

Wow, nice replies... thanks!

Oh, and I removed the boldness from the original post, to soothe everyone's eyeballs. My mistake there; sorry. I'm learning.

Anyway, I like the idea of exploration in the shower. Everything nice and slick and clean. Good idea, thanks.

Can't say he had any bad experiences in his past as I'm pretty much the only woman he's ever "been" with.

Regarding him possibly being raised that it's dirty - I doubt it, judging by all the other stuff he's willing to do with/to me. I dunno...

hubby · 09-16-2009, 09:44 AM

Probably TMI, but what is the landscapping like down there?

michzz · 09-16-2009, 10:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by okeydokie

oh, and thanks for the large bold print, i had to take off my glasses to avoid a headache

Huh? Not seasoning the text at all.

CarolineMRF · 09-16-2009, 10:11 AM

If a woman shaves every two days, this may be more of a "welcome mat".....