TAMers who have gone "missing"... - Page 4 - Talk About Marriage
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post #46 of 150 (permalink) Old 05-17-2016, 09:09 PM
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Re: TAMers who have gone "missing"...

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There are various versions so maybe someone that knows more can chime in. All I know is OMG OMG OMG it is Elaine and a few of our once prolific male posters had a bit of a sexting thing going on. The other was the guy that loved his Princess and Noticed The Details. Shame he didn't really love his Princess that much.
Ah, that. I actually missed it entirely, and only heard about the aftermath with very few details. I must have been away or something... I had no idea CM was involved with that. How embarrassing for him. He used to chastise me (and many others) regularly for all kinds of things.

Are you able to fill me in on what happened? I knew it had something to do with OMGitsElaine or whatever her name was, and possibly sending PMs containing explicit photos of herself to some folks.

So what was her deal? Was she here to hook up with vulnerable people or something?

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post #47 of 150 (permalink) Old 05-17-2016, 09:20 PM
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Re: TAMers who have gone "missing"...

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CM isn't currently banned.

Details maintains his innocence in OMGgate, and loves his princess dearly (and may lose her soon-ish).
Oh, @CharlieParker, I hate to hear that. I've been wondering about Details for a while. If you speak to him, would you please tell him that B1 and I still think about him, and his family, and keep them in our prayers. I was holding on to hope for a miracle for his princess with regard to a clinical trial.

I hope this finds you and Mrs. Parker well. Take care, my friend.

~ EI
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post #48 of 150 (permalink) Old 05-17-2016, 09:27 PM
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Re: TAMers who have gone "missing"...

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Ah, that. I actually missed it entirely, and only heard about the aftermath with very few details. I must have been away or something... I had no idea CM was involved with that. How embarrassing for him. He used to chastise me (and many others) regularly for all kinds of things.

Are you able to fill me in on what happened? I knew it had something to do with OMGitsElaine or whatever her name was, and possibly sending PMs containing explicit photos of herself to some folks.

So what was her deal? Was she here to hook up with vulnerable people or something?

CM is a good guy. There were many valuable posters who were caught up in the crosshairs of the OMGit'sElaineGate scandal. There may have been a bit of guilt by association going on with it. Whatever the case, B1 and I keep up with CM on Facebook and I assure you that we have always known him to be nothing less than a gentleman.
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post #49 of 150 (permalink) Old 05-17-2016, 09:33 PM
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Re: TAMers who have gone "missing"...

Back to the purpose of this thread. Does anyone know what happened to Acabado? He was one of my most favorite posters. He was a Reconciliation thread regular. I thought his contributions to the R thread, and throughout CWI, in general, were invaluable. He was one of those who went from being a frequent TAM contributor, and then, without notice, suddenly disappeared.
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post #50 of 150 (permalink) Old 05-17-2016, 10:47 PM
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Re: TAMers who have gone "missing"...

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CM is a good guy. There were many valuable posters who were caught up in the crosshairs of the OMGit'sElaineGate scandal. There may have been a bit of guilt by association going on with it. Whatever the case, B1 and I keep up with CM on Facebook and I assure you that we have always known him to be nothing less than a gentleman.
I guess that is the difference between TAM and a more public place like FB. It is easy to be nasty in an identity protected environment. CM may well show one side on places like FB but there were quite a number of female posters here he was particularly nasty to. I did not realise he was also having a go at some of the men.
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post #51 of 150 (permalink) Old 05-17-2016, 11:25 PM
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Re: TAMers who have gone "missing"...

Hello,

This thread inspired me to finally sign up and become a TAM
member. I am a loooooooong time lurker.

I have wondered about many missing TAMers over the years
but one I truly miss is draconis. (Wow, I really am a long time lurker!)
He gave such good advice and then, poof, gone. I hope he is OK.

After I found TAM he was the reason I stuck around for so long (along with many other great TAMers, to many to list).

Thank you for reading.
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post #52 of 150 (permalink) Old 05-18-2016, 06:14 AM
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Re: TAMers who have gone "missing"...

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Originally Posted by Holland View Post
I guess that is the difference between TAM and a more public place like FB. It is easy to be nasty in an identity protected environment. CM may well show one side on places like FB but there were quite a number of female posters here he was particularly nasty to. I did not realise he was also having a go at some of the men.
I was actually going to say exactly this. I'm sure CM's a good guy in real life, but often in places like this, one doesn't always use their 'real' persona, or it's easy to get caught up in things.

Like I said though, if he had a reason to come to TAM in the first place, I never saw it, nor did he ever divulge it in posts or to me personally (I once asked him via PM). People usually come here when they're in crisis mode, and some stick around, some don't. His marriage was great, his wife was awesome, and he just seemed to like to give out advice to people who's lives weren't as good as his. Which is fine, of course. But the fact that he could be so smug and righteous about things that he apparently didn't have any experience in irked a lot of people. It was his tone and sometimes outright dismissal of people he didn't like, more than anything.

He did a lot of baiting here, IMO, and some of us took the bait, unfortunately.

Anyway, moving on!
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post #53 of 150 (permalink) Old 05-18-2016, 06:28 AM
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Re: TAMers who have gone "missing"...

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Originally Posted by EI View Post
There were many valuable posters who were caught up in the crosshairs of the OMGit'sElaineGate scandal. There may have been a bit of guilt by association going on with it.
Admittedly, I don't know the full story of what happened there, but what I do understand is that there were some suggestive PM's, as well as some racy pictures sent by her to a handful of the better-known posters here (and vice versa, I understand), and it had been going on for a while before somebody blew the whistle. I suppose only the mods or Chris know the contents of these PM's and who was involved, and we don't need to know the details beyond that.

For a place that preaches from the highest pulpit against things like this, the fact that anybody here got caught up in it is disconcerting. Nobody's perfect, but when you have Joe Blow giving advice to people about EA's and PA's and affair-proofing your marriage and everything else you find on TAM - and then they turn around and carry on with somebody like her, right here on TAM... yikes.
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post #54 of 150 (permalink) Old 05-18-2016, 08:31 AM
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Re: TAMers who have gone "missing"...

There's plenty of "1% great marriage" folks in here, making the rest of us 99% marriage types wonder how they have time to devote to their own wildly successful marriages and be here offering wisdom et. al.
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post #55 of 150 (permalink) Old 05-18-2016, 03:42 PM
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Re: TAMers who have gone "missing"...

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There's plenty of "1% great marriage" folks in here, making the rest of us 99% marriage types wonder how they have time to devote to their own wildly successful marriages and be here offering wisdom et. al.
I do about 3 hrs a day driving around and waiting to pick up kids, plenty of time to multi task and log on to TAM for 5 mins here and there.
Also plenty of time to check Stocks and shop online.

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post #56 of 150 (permalink) Old 05-18-2016, 03:47 PM
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Re: TAMers who have gone "missing"...

Southern wife, scarlett.

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/family-...-my-story.html

“In the midst of winter, I found there was, within me, an invincible summer." - Albert Camus
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post #57 of 150 (permalink) Old 05-18-2016, 05:28 PM
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Re: TAMers who have gone "missing"...

Also Jellybeans, what happened to her? I remember when she first started posting.
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post #58 of 150 (permalink) Old 05-19-2016, 04:33 PM
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Re: TAMers who have gone "missing"...

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There's plenty of "1% great marriage" folks in here, making the rest of us 99% marriage types wonder how they have time to devote to their own wildly successful marriages and be here offering wisdom et. al.
Are we looked down upon for still being here - for posting? Maybe better to not answer this.... I actually did land here due to something I was struggling with -with my husband.. small, selfish of me & stupid as it may have been.. we worked through it , it was good. ...We realized wonderful things along the way opening more & more up with each other..

I had a member here pretty much attack me telling me my life has to be hollow & some ugly things that I spend so much time putting emoticons in my posts, why the hell am I here.. basically.. Oouch!

My husband might end up laid off soon (?) and I'll be working full time plus if so.. not posting as much.. but true.. for the past so many yrs, I've had lots of free time - while he was at work...

Truth is.. posting here early on helped divert my attention ...Where > away from porn sites...(Yeah I was very tempted!).....I think I made the right choice to throw myself into a sex forum that wasn't showing off wieners & such, when my drive exploded... I loved the more serious / articulate tone here by many members, I could get into that !!.. It helped occupy my mind, certainly more healthy over the alternative!!

Thank you TAM, you saved me from being a porn addict.. Hey, you never know why some of us land here.. ha ha.. I think a "forum junkie" is a little more respectable... don't you?
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post #59 of 150 (permalink) Old 05-19-2016, 05:11 PM
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Re: TAMers who have gone "missing"...

@SimplyAmorous don't ever change, and your post had zero emotions



Sigh, my wife gives me the speaking treatment.
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post #60 of 150 (permalink) Old 05-19-2016, 06:38 PM
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Re: TAMers who have gone "missing"...

Quote:
Originally Posted by rockon View Post
Hello,

This thread inspired me to finally sign up and become a TAM
member. I am a loooooooong time lurker.

I have wondered about many missing TAMers over the years
but one I truly miss is draconis. (Wow, I really am a long time lurker!)
He gave such good advice and then, poof, gone. I hope he is OK.

After I found TAM he was the reason I stuck around for so long (along with many other great TAMers, to many to list).

Thank you for reading.
People vanish for all sorts of reasons. One is burnout. There is a lot of pain that comes through in some of the forums. And it can be hard to take in large doses.
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