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post #31 of 58 (permalink) Old 01-03-2017, 05:18 AM
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Re: What's your New Year's Resolution 2017

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* Travel somewhere I've never been with my fiance (getting married this year, so this might be a honeymoon thing)
Happy New Year to you Ms. Deidre, so do you know where you be going for your honeymoon? If you don't mind share it to us here in TAM.

I know in your posts in TAM you mentioned your Fiance' is a police officer, I know cops working hours can be hectic. You also said that your Fiance' and you talk about you be a SAHM after marriage (SAHMom, when have kids).
Are you plan to stay at home right away after marriage? (as in a SAHWife--when there no kids yet). Or you plan to continue working and stay at home when there kids come into the picture--(SAHMom)?
.........
There is a quite difference between the two, eventhough it both Stay home. But one stay home AFTER have kids (SAHM), and one stay home when there NO kids yet in the picture (SAHWife).
You seem like a career woman, so I think you prefer working until you have kids and then stay home, right?

eta: Ms. Deidre was nice enough to answer my reply in private message. Thank you Ms. Deidre, she very very nice.


Last edited by jasmine31; 01-04-2017 at 07:20 PM.
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post #32 of 58 (permalink) Old 01-03-2017, 08:17 AM
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Re: What's your New Year's Resolution 2017

I normally don't make resolutions but this year is an exception. 1. Work on my codependency issues. 2. Lose weight. 3. Learn meditation.

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post #33 of 58 (permalink) Old 01-03-2017, 04:02 PM
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Re: What's your New Year's Resolution 2017

I need to lose weight...

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post #34 of 58 (permalink) Old 01-03-2017, 09:07 PM
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Re: What's your New Year's Resolution 2017

Mine was to quit being complacent. I haven't started yet. Might start tomorrow though.
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post #35 of 58 (permalink) Old 01-04-2017, 06:42 AM Thread Starter
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Re: What's your New Year's Resolution 2017

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My New Year resolution? I need to learn to damn appreciate my husband more. I need to count my damn blessing, and damn thank you to my lucky stars.
........
Because a man who 30 years old (age 30 is NOT old at all for a man). Handsome. Height 6'1"--tall and slim, he slim and very lean. There zero fat anywhere on his body. He been this skinny/slim body type all his life, even when he was a little boy.
Not only he slim and good looking. He more than well-endowed and beyond well-hung.
He make an income of 100K a year. And Debt-Free.. Checking account have more than enough money to pay for ALL bills. Two saving accounts has more than decent money saving for rainy days.
Two 401k accounts and one IRA account saving for retirement and all 3 has more than decent money retirement saving in it, espcially his IRA account.
Life insurance have, Health insurance have. Excellent perfect credit scores.
Just with his 2 saving accounts and his IRA account alone is more than enough for me just in case if he die. But he still added on Life insurance just in case. Because he is a huge planner.

With all those qualities, he has alot of options out there to chose who his wife is. He could have go to country like China, Vietnam or Russia to find a younger pretty virgin wife if he wants. I'm sure we all heard of Vietnam Mail order bride and Russia Mail order bride.
But he doesn't have to go that far, right here in the U.S he way more than capable of find a wife with his income and savings. A guy who that much Debt-free, his age and his yearly income, there no problem for him to find a wife anywhere (U.S or China).
But he chose to bursted his guts chase me. And adamant on maried me (when I'm not even pregnant). He doesn't have to married me, but he did.
I'm just an average looking girl with parents who discriminate against him and disrespect him. He knows it all, and he still chose to married me.
Also, I'm just a girl with a High school diploma (No college degree). A girl who work minimum wage job all my life.

I need to work on my self-worth (due to my mother who abuse me throughout my whole childhood, throughout my whole childhood. My mother strip down all my self-worth). I really need to work on this childhood baggage of mine. And I need to learn to love and appreciate my husband more.

Eversince I married him, a month he gives me an average of 1K. And he damn adamant on give it to me, he said I'm his 'wife'. I know he wants to see me well taken care of, more than well taken care of. And I do appreciate him, but I really don't need it since he fully pay for my EVERYTHING from a to z.
To be frank, the money he gives me monthly I just put it in a saving. Since he pays for my everything already, yeah that include food I eat is he pays. He pays for my a to z, what do I need it for? Clothes, shoes? He buy it all for me. Heck, even my facewash is he bought. Hell, even my gas is he pays, and that on top of pay for my car insurance.
He could have just put that 1K a month extra to his IRA account retirement saving instead of give me.. Yeah, I know he already have quite decent retirement saving in his IRA, but I'm sure we all heard of no money is too much money.
But he chose to give me instead of put it it more into his IRA account. I need to damn appreciate my husband more.

He work his butt off long hours so he can make 100K a year income, just so I can live a comfy life.
He damn adamant on give me the luxury of be a Stay at home Wife (yes, right now it a SAHWife because I still haven't give you your baby wish yet). He secure everything from emotionally to financially, so I live a stable steady comfy life. Because of him, I get to live a comfy life not have to worry about money.

I posted this in a New Year resolution thread in a mommie-baby site where I'm a frequent poster on (it a community forum for mommies, pregnancy, women who TTC, etc.. where women talk to other women for advice and support). I'm mostly a lurker here, I don't post here much.
And the ladies in there gave me advice, they right. I need to damn appreciate my husband more, love him more. Don't self-subconciously sabotage my marriage. My mother abuse me throughout my whole childhood is NOT an damn excuse for not know how to appreciate my husband.
Because with his USD income and U.S citizenship, he way more than capable of find another girl to married. He stays in this marriage because he loves me. So learn to damn appreciate him.

I need to remind myself how blessed I am and learn to appreciate my husband. This is something I need work on in 2017, along with work on my childhood baggage. In all fairness, I do appreciate my husband, it just I need to appreciate him More, keyword here is 'more'.

oh, and I need to damn learn to STOP subconciously seeking my mother approval of my marriage. A mother who abuse me ad belittle me throughout my whole childhood. And in my adulthoood (just because I married a guy who is an ethnicity she doesn't like). If I write out what my mother said about my husband, I just want to dig a hole and crawl in, or put a bag over my head; yes, it that terrible and hurtful.. My mother also insult me and spit in my face, call me dirty and call my furture children dirty.
I need to accept it, that my mother just won't change. I need to subconciously give up on her. And start enjoy living my life with my husband--he is all I have left now (beside my older brother whom I'm close with).. This is NOT 1930s Shanghai, I'm not living in that era time. Sorry mother, but this is the guy I married, he is my husband, whether you approve our marriage or not.
Seeking help on Foo issues is a big task but doable with a good counselor. Do you have one?

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post #36 of 58 (permalink) Old 01-04-2017, 06:44 AM Thread Starter
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Re: What's your New Year's Resolution 2017

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Originally Posted by *Deidre* View Post
*Walk away from people who say one thing, do another. No more fake friends in my life.

* Pray more
* Enter a cross fit competition (maybe?) lol
* Travel somewhere I've never been with my fiance (getting married this year, so this might be a honeymoon thing)

* Volunteer at a homeless shelter
* Save more, spend less
Keep us posted if you do choose to enter the crossfit competition. My friend had done that the last few years with her gym. The workouts to even be considered for regional are challenging but what a rush !.

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post #37 of 58 (permalink) Old 01-04-2017, 06:46 AM Thread Starter
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Re: What's your New Year's Resolution 2017

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(1) Find a beautiful woman in whom I can find unfettered trust in again!

(2) Learn how to use all of the damned facets of this iPhone 7 that my sons gifted to me awhile back, so that I can become somewhat smarter than it is!
Arb, I'm right there with you. It's sad when my 10 year old knows more about my cell phone than I do :/



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post #38 of 58 (permalink) Old 01-04-2017, 06:58 AM
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What's your New Year's Resolution 2017

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Originally Posted by Lila View Post
Arb, I'm right there with you. It's sad when my 10 year old knows more about my cell phone than I do :/



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I'm still trying to get my wife to remember how to turn on the TV, cable box, dvd player and Amazon Fire TV.

It's hopeless. But she knows her way around FB. And Candy Crush.
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post #39 of 58 (permalink) Old 01-04-2017, 07:15 AM Thread Starter
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Re: What's your New Year's Resolution 2017

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I'm still trying to get my wife to remember how to turn on the TV, cable box, dvd player and Amazon Fire TV.

It's hopeless. But she knows her way around FB. And Candy Crush.
That's sad.

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post #40 of 58 (permalink) Old 01-04-2017, 07:28 AM
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Re: What's your New Year's Resolution 2017

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I've been wanting to do this for years - and scan all my older prints/negatives, and slides. It's a huge job, so I may wait a few years until I retire and need something more to do. I'd be interested in hearing how it goes and how you organize everything.
It is a huge job... I did this in spurts about 10 yrs ago.. it started with scanning an old collection for my Mother in law to put on disks for all the siblings... took hours, a couple days.. then after that was finished.... I thought... well I need to do this with our old photos too..

I've always had our pics in albums (probably have over 20+ now) half of those were from film... so it was time.. I stayed up one night ALL NIGHT LONG doing this (still wasn't finished) ...but yeah.. it feels really good to get it done (I didn't scan every pic, but the favorites)... then after all this ...it's pretty important to put all this work on a couple hard drives , Dvd's and/ or CD's... ..in a couple different places...

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post #41 of 58 (permalink) Old 01-04-2017, 09:26 AM
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Re: What's your New Year's Resolution 2017

Eating better, organizing my closets, taking some classes at nearby Community college... we'll have 2 sons in college and Mom!... waiting till the fall though.

Last edited by SimplyAmorous; 01-04-2017 at 12:32 PM.
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post #42 of 58 (permalink) Old 01-04-2017, 06:32 PM
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Re: What's your New Year's Resolution 2017

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Keep us posted if you do choose to enter the crossfit competition. My friend had done that the last few years with her gym. The workouts to even be considered for regional are challenging but what a rush !.

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I know of people who have done these comps too and it is so hard! lol But, something to maybe strive for?

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post #43 of 58 (permalink) Old 01-04-2017, 06:35 PM
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Re: What's your New Year's Resolution 2017

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I know of people who have done these comps too and it is so hard! lol But, something to maybe strive for?
Go for it @*Deidre* !!! I will make more of an effort to post more of the many inspirational Crossfit memes I come across in the exercise motivation thread
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post #44 of 58 (permalink) Old 01-04-2017, 06:38 PM
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Re: What's your New Year's Resolution 2017

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Go for it @*Deidre* !!! I will make more of an effort to post more of the many inspirational Crossfit memes I come across in the exercise motivation thread
hahahaha!!! Those are funny!

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post #45 of 58 (permalink) Old 01-04-2017, 06:46 PM
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Re: What's your New Year's Resolution 2017

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hahahaha!!! Those are funny!
Some of the better ones I would get banned if I posted here (guys with their penises touching seems to be a common theme lol)

Definitely give it a shot though. Did my first PL meet last year. Still debating whether I do one this year or not.
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