I find it laughable that this movie is even being compared to porn.
I think you'll find that most making such comparisons aren't drawing parallels between the specific content, but rather the intended (and apparently successful) impacts on their target audiences, as well as the resulting impacts those responses might have on the partners of those audience members. Posted via Mobile Device
Yeah, but this is circular. Women complaining about men looking at naked women all the time, and then women do the same thing when they get the chance. So men say, wait a minute, weren't you just complaining about objectification and unrealistic body images? Now you like it? Men's takeaway may just be what's good for the gander is good for the goose.
We'd probably all be better off if we could agree what is acceptable behavior, but often people get mired in double standards -- when I do it, it's no big deal, come on, lighten up ... when you do it, well, your an insensitive selfish jerk.
And keep in mind, I'm not complaining, but just discussing. If women enjoy it, more power to them. But people are always concerned about the implications and fairness and what their SO thinks, etc. So it's kind of an interesting topic.
My take is probably different than most here. I have spent nearly my entire marriage (18 years) with blinders on as to other men. Always only had eyes for my husband and respected him enough not to oggle other men. Come to find out he did not feel the same about me and he spent our entire marriage oogling/having fantasies about other women: my friends, co-workers, my twin, strangers, etc. It hurt more than you can imagine. Guess how I behave now? I won't apologize for it either. I kept my end of the bargain, he did not so now he has little to complain about when the shoe is on the other foot. That isn't a double standard. His moaning that I look know sure is though. Sucks, don't it.
My take is probably different than most here. I have spent nearly my entire marriage (18 years) with blinders on as to other men. Always only had eyes for my husband and respected him enough not to oggle other men. Come to find out he did not feel the same about me and he spent our entire marriage oogling/having fantasies about other women: my friends, co-workers, my twin, strangers, etc. It hurt more than you can imagine. Guess how I behave now? I won't apologize for it either. I kept my end of the bargain, he did not so now he has little to complain about when the shoe is on the other foot. That isn't a double standard. His moaning that I look know sure is though. Sucks, don't it.
Sound fair enough.
But he was just looking at and fantasizing about women? I would guess 99% of men do that. Since most men separate lust from love easily, it doesn't mean anything more to them that a lady's vibrator or her 50 Shades type novel -- ie, tool for arousal. Asking a man to not look at women is probably like asking women to never fantasize. Maybe it could be done with superhuman effort, but it sort of takes away a lot of the fun in life.
Still fantasizing about coworkers and friends, etc. is a bad idea and a little creepy. But I think you overreacted if it was just because he was acting like almost all men act, as long as he wasn't rude or obnoxious about it, ie. leering in your presence.
But he was just looking at and fantasizing about women? I would guess 99% of men do that. Since most men separate lust from love easily, it doesn't mean anything more to them that a lady's vibrator or her 50 Shades type novel -- ie, tool for arousal. Asking a man to not look at women is probably like asking women to never fantasize. Maybe it could be done with superhuman effort, but it sort of takes away a lot of the fun in life.
Still fantasizing about coworkers and friends, etc. is a bad idea and a little creepy. But I think you overreacted if it was just because he was acting like almost all men act, as long as he wasn't rude or obnoxious about it, ie. leering in your presence.
Oh, I overreacted? Hey, I managed to separate love from lust perfectly once the blinders came off. I mean asking a man to not look at a woman goes against everything, right? but a woman is a **** for doing so. Guess what? You treat us like **** and we look at others and many act on it.
The fact that I have not acted on it it is a miracle. The end.
If I wanted to look at sexy naked guys I would either do it alone or with my hubby, at home, where we could do something about it if I get turned on. I am certainly not paying the exorbitant price they charge at the movie theater to see it and then sit there in sweaty frustration watching more of it, smelling bad popcorn and sticking to the floor for two hours.
But he was just looking at and fantasizing about women? I would guess 99% of men do that. Since most men separate lust from love easily, it doesn't mean anything more to them that a lady's vibrator or her 50 Shades type novel -- ie, tool for arousal. Asking a man to not look at women is probably like asking women to never fantasize. Maybe it could be done with superhuman effort, but it sort of takes away a lot of the fun in life.
Still fantasizing about coworkers and friends, etc. is a bad idea and a little creepy. But I think you overreacted if it was just because he was acting like almost all men act, as long as he wasn't rude or obnoxious about it, ie. leering in your presence.
God I just LOVE your justification. I finally did exactly what my husband always did and I need an excuse?
We do...wtf are you saying??? Lust means we want to phuck, love means we expect to phuck.
SARCASM intended....who are these phucking men that come up with this shet??? Take care of your mate properly, and you will be taken care of as well.
End of story, full stop. Posted via Mobile Device
Oh, I overreacted? Hey, I managed to separate love from lust perfectly once the blinders came off. I mean asking a man to not look at a woman goes against everything, right? but a woman is a **** for doing so. Guess what? You treat us like **** and we look at others and many act on it.
The fact that I have not acted on it it is a miracle. The end.
You are a little defensive. No, a lot defensive.
"I mean asking a man to not look at a woman goes against everything, right?"
Yes. But you could ask for him to be respectful. Respect limits., No leering in your presence. Leave your friends alone. But asking him to never look is violating his personal fantasy space.
> but a woman is a **** for doing so. "
Absolutely not. What's wrong with looking and fantasizing? Just keep it respectful. The point is not to insult your partner, but to keep your motor humming for several more decades.
I think you need to align your expectations for human males to something more like they really are. It's not out of malice. It's just their nature.
God I just LOVE your justification. I finally did exactly what my husband always did and I need an excuse? **** off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
No, you just need to stop being so angry. If you are enjoying yourself and everything is fair, why so angry???
"I mean asking a man to not look at a woman goes against everything, right?"
Yes. But you could ask for him to be respectful. Respect limits., No leering in your presence. Leave your friends alone. But asking him to never look is violating his personal fantasy space.
> but a woman is a **** for doing so. "
Absolutely not. What's wrong with looking and fantasizing? Just keep it respectful. The point is not to insult your partner, but to keep your motor humming for several more decades.
I think you need to align your expectations for human males to something more like they really are. It's not out of malice. It's just their nature.
You do realize, that was NOT the right thing to say to her, right?
131Likes
