# what does men like or love ??????????



## lil miss wifey (Sep 5, 2010)

well i thought that this was an important thing to ask, because we as women r always focusing on what makes us happy what our man does or should do to make us happy and although sex sucks with me and my hubby i love him to death do us part, anyway so i want to know what men like, love or expect from there woman generally not only sexwise people and y men doesnt want to show there feelings to there girl, i mean we past that stage where u have to be this big hero sometimes i feel like my husband is keeping in a lot of things that frustrates him, alot of men could relate to that but y ? does it mean u can deal with it no need for us to worry or ur really hurting inside and what us to try to get it out "to show that we care " because sad to say if a man looks worried about thigs other than the normal pay the bills etc we r quick to jump back on us, hmmmmmmm men is very confusing and boy i cant keep my feelings inside............ ok i will stop here lol


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## Boogsie (Aug 24, 2010)

lil miss wifey said:


> although sex sucks with me and my hubby i love him to death do us part, anyway so i want to know what men like, love or expect from there woman generally not only sexwise people and y men doesnt want to show there feelings to there girl, i mean we past that stage where u have to be this big hero sometimes i feel like my husband is keeping in a lot of things that frustrates him, alot of men could relate to that but y ? does it mean u can deal with it no need for us to worry or ur really hurting inside and what us to try to get it out "to show that we care " because sad to say if a man looks worried about thigs other than the normal pay the bills etc we r quick to jump back on us, hmmmmmmm men is very confusing and boy i cant keep my feelings inside............ ok i will stop here lol


Here is my list as presented to my wife almost a year ago. It should be noted that NONE of the things on this list have come to pass. My wife told me she is happy with the marriage, and in the marriage, and doesn't see why things have to change.

1) an active sex life with an enthusiastic partner who is into me and "wants" me. It took me many years to realize that in our entire relationship (14 years) she has initiated sex twice. Oddly enough, it is those two times that I remember in vivid detail. One who is comfortable with herself enough to tell me what she wants and not feel guilty or ashamed to ask/tell me what she wants.

2) Someone who is genuinely happy to see me. My wife doesn't work. We have my adult son at home who takes care of himself. She has nothing but time. Her job consists of doing laundry (1 day a week for about 2 hours), making dinner (5-6 days a week when we don't eat out or bring it home), and take care of the cat. 2-3 nights a week I do the dishes and clean up after dinner. A few times a month I make dinner. I occasionally help her with the laundry, etc. All I ask for is a smile, a hug, and a kiss when I walk though the door. What I usually get is her turning around from her computer and saying, "Hey."

3) A companion. Someone who wants to do things with me. Just the two of us. A move, bowling, visiting friends or family, going to the gym, riding bicycles, going for a walk. As it is now, I do everything alone, or with my son and/or daughter. She'll go someplace with me about 2-3 times a year. Hell, when we watch the same TV show we do that almost separately.


For me, that is about it. That is how I get my "connection" to my wife.


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

Belly full, testicles empty, Let him feel like a man. Master those three and guys are putty in your hands.


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

unbelievable said:


> Belly full, testicles empty, Let him feel like a man. Master those three and guys are putty in your hands.


lil miss wifey

1 SEX: Although your situation is different, but most of men are sex animals. I see a lot of men here crying that they don't have enough sex. Once a month, twice a twice, once in three months, I can't imagine. For a woman who likes sex, once a month for me is like a big torture. I don't know why they still try so hard to stay. If we are like flowers, they are like trees, they need to be watered by our love juice regularly. If we water them, they stay healthy. They don't become dry. For men who don't want to have sex with their wives, I think they still need sex, they might be getting it somewhere else!

2 HOME COOKED MEALS: In western countries, it is expensive to eat in restaurants. I thought that people have to do a lot of cooking at home. My husband told me no. People just go to supermarkets and buy already prepared food. They are not good at all. Home cooked meals are fresh and healthy, they also show wife's effort into the family. In Taiwan, it is cheap to eat out, most of people eat out. If a wife is cooking at home, the man values her a great deal. If you cook at home, you know what he likes and what he doesn't like, in order to make him happy, after a few years you cook all the food he likes, he appreciates a lot. 

3 DON'T BELITTLE HIM: Never say, I wish I were married to someone else. Never say, you are useless. Never say, why do your friends make more money than you do. Never say, I want this, and hint he can't give it to you. Never make your man feel that you want a life style he can't provide. You just stop him from trying hard to work and please you. 

4 DON'T COMPLAIN AND FIGHT: A man doesn't like a woman who likes to complain all the time. He'll be sick of her is she does it. Unfortunately, a lot of women are like that, they only see what they don't have and what their husbands don't do. So they feel sorry for themselves and sink into depression, and they make their husbands even more frustrated. 

5 A woman has to be good with money. She has to know how to run her family. If your whole income is $5,000 a month, don't spend $6,000 or even more. Spend less than $5,000 and try to put some money aside for rainy days. You have to know what is going on in the house, all the bills, all the expenses, let him know that everything is taken care of, he doesn't need to worry. 

6: A clean home. It is important for him to relax in a clean home after he's been working a whole day outside. 

7: Conversation. Many men find that they can't have conversation with their wives. Men like to talk about hobbies, business, politics, and other things. A lot of women only like to gossip, which men don't like to hear actually, especially malicious gossip. But women like to gossip, how come? 

8: Forgot to add one more important thing, never try to control men or change men. They don't like to be controlled and nobody can change them, only they themselves can change them if they want to. Be happy with the way they are, since that's that man you are married to.
There are still many things, different men like different things, find out what your men like and focus on those things.

I admire you for asking this question. It means you are putting a lot of effort trying to make your marriage work. Hope your husband appreciates the effort you put into your marriage.


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## lil miss wifey (Sep 5, 2010)

awwwwwww thanks for ur comment, especially the last part  well i agree on the "dont try to change ur man part" as well as the others but this one is for real , like with my husband at first when we just got married apart from "sex" i always wanted him around me all day long, when he isnt working, i want him stay with me and listen to me and everything was me me me at first and then i realized that although he loves me he just got sick and tired of being with me all the damn time lol and whatever, i dont have thrust issues with my husband at all, i just always wanted him around, then seeing him looking like im killing him slowly but surely i just let him go do what he wanted go out with his friends or by his friends or whatever, i had to learn that on my own that men need space from us and they would miss us and love us even more and after they "play" lol they would want to hear us so im cool he's cool lol  but the control part hmmmm my husband........ dont matter what he always wants me to make the decisions like money wise to even what he should wear to work or go out, he even ask me when we are out shopping if he shoud buy this or that and i feel awkward when we are out when people is right there staring at me lol to say yes like im paying for it, when im not, i understand he maybe wants me to feel part of everything he's doing its actually nice tho but still awkward


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

The fact that it even crosses your mind to try to please him sets you apart from a great many women. I don't think any of this is rocket science. If he puts your needs first and you put his first, both of you will end up having more than either ever dreamed.


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## Boogsie (Aug 24, 2010)

lil miss wifey said:


> but the control part hmmmm my husband........ dont matter what he always wants me to make the decisions like money wise to even what he should wear to work or go out, he even ask me when we are out shopping if he shoud buy this or that and i feel awkward when we are out when people is right there staring at me lol to say yes like im paying for it, when im not, i understand he maybe wants me to feel part of everything he's doing its actually nice tho but still awkward


I've only quoted part of your post because I feel it is the most important part. What you described is a classic "nice guy" trait as described in the book "No More Mr. Nice Guy".

It sounds like you husband is very passive, a trait which most women don't find attractive at all. 

W: Where do you want to eat?
H: It doesn't matter.
W: Well we can go to A, B, C, or D. You choose.
H: Wherever you want to go is fine.
W: Well, are you up for Italian or steak, or what?
H: It doesn't matter just pick a place.
W: I don't care either, just pick one.
H: It really doesn't matter to me.

and on an on. I can recall countless conversations I've had like this with my wife in the past. Looking back, it is really her asking me to LEAD. Something I never did.

Women, and men alike do not want to sleep with people they find unattractive.

Most men I know, friends and family, the man will do anything to absolutely ensure the wife is never pissed off about anything.

I wonder how many men here ever said the words, "I can't do that, the wife would really be pissed off."

For just about ever male I know it is always about the wifes happiness and never theirs. In talking with my wife I know this to be true.

Yeah, she gets pissed off about things I do that she thinks I shouldn't or doesn't want me to, but that is her problem, and she has to deal with it herself. As long as it doesn't adversely affect our finances or put anyone in danger, I have no problem doing what I want any more.

I think the biggest problem in marriage today is too many men put their wives on pedastals. The wives love it for a while, but it starts to get old when your H turns into a passive doormat who has to walk around on eggshells. Then the sex leaves the marriage. The husband tries everything from being passive aggressive to flat out begging for sex and intimacy, both of which are further turn offs to women.

As it was in my case, I was never taught how to be a man. My father is a doormat, passive person and since going through my own transformation and talking with my mother, she wishes he would pick up some of my new-found traits.


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