# Ladies, how quick can you orgasm?



## donny64 (Apr 21, 2012)

From about the time my W got comfortable with me, she has never been hard to get to orgasm, either timing wise or with multiples. It didn't start out that way, but over not a lot of time (a couple months), she has been an orgasm machine. I tried to really "learn her" and spent a lot of time trying to give her orgasms....both a lot of them and different types. 

But one thing I've noticed as time goes on, is she seems to orgasm quicker and quicker. She's not much into foreplay, which is slightly disappointing for me as I am, and typically wants to get "right to business" pretty quick. I love to slowly tease her and get her really ramped up, but she has always been fine with just getting right to intercourse. I swear, if she says "I'm horny", all I have to do is make sure I can get it in without hurting her from lack of lube on the outside, and she is immediately and fully "into it".

I try to keep the sexual tension pretty high with her at most times. Several times a day, there are sexual undertones to our conversation or things I'll say (or I'll fairly often just boldly tell her I can't wait to get home to phuck her or watch her orgasm). Just enough to let her know I'm still desiring her, and even (as the last couple months or so) when I'm so very stressed and not always in the mood, I like to keep the sexual tension high and let her know she's desired. Sometimes we're going at it 4 or 5 days a week, sometimes two or three times a day, and other times we'll take an unspoken "break" where neither of us initiate or seem very "horny" for a week or even two, and both are content just to cuddle on the couch or fall asleep cuddling in bed. It amazes me that we seem so in sync that we both seem to want it about the same, or at times not much at all, and these desires (or lack thereof) seem to fall to both of us about the same. We are so damned content and there is never any sexual frustration, even during periods where we aren't having sex.

As time goes on, her orgasms seem to be coming faster and faster. Last night when we got back from being out with friends after a work function out of town, we got back to our room and I threw her down on the bed, balcony door "open to the world" (yet not visible to anyone), pulled her panties off quickly, passionately, and a little forcefully, told her "I need to be in you now", went straight to intercourse, and within a no kidding 15 to 20 seconds after penetration with no foreplay, she was already starting her "I'm....I'm...." ("I'm coming" in my W's speak) and started first orgasm. I'm used to her having one after just a couple of minutes or sometimes even just one minute, but 15 seconds?!!! The timing to her first orgasm seems to just keep decreasing as time goes on.

What drives a woman to this "ability" if you will? Am I just the luckiest guy on earth, or have some of you women found an ability to do this when you are incredibly comfortable, happy, trusting, and satisfied in a relationship? We have an outstanding relationship, she was in a bad and sexless marriage for many years before me where she just did not want sex at all, and we hit it off exceptionally well in bed (and in the relationship in general) from almost the start. But again, 15 seconds? I knew I (she / we) was / are "lucky" in this department, but this just blows my mind.


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## The Cro-Magnon (Sep 30, 2012)

It starts with F

and ends with E.


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## aribabe (Aug 9, 2012)

Agreed

Donny64: it's highly unlikely that 15 seconds of "dry" intercourse would cause any woman to actually orgasm. Other than the "I'm cumming" thing that she does.... do you know the signs of an actual female orgasm?


The Cro-Magnon said:


> It starts with F
> 
> and ends with E.


_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ScaredandUnsure (Nov 17, 2011)

Alone I'm there within 2 minutes or so.

With a partner, it depends. The guy I'm seeing right now can make me orgasm fast. I'd say about 5 minutes-ish? The last guy I was with....sex was pretty disappointing and towards the end I didn't orgasm at all.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

I've never faked an orgasm in my life... I







them and I WANT MINE... Been this way forever. MY drive has always been decent, and steady... 

For the 1st 19 yrs, we didn't have as much sex as we COULD and SHOULD have... so when we got to it -we were both dying for it... the passion was so high, both of us on the verge...foreplay so heavenly ...it couldn't last... he'd have to remove my hand from touching him ...and when I got on top...probably only 2 minutes & very slow pumping & it was ALL OVER! 

Had we been having more sex, this would have lasted way longer. 

Then during my HIGH DRIVE phase, I literally needed 0 foreplay....never forget one day...got on top, and within 30 seconds I had one... he was like "WHAT??" 

It was also the only time I had 2 in one session (the 2nd being of lessor intensity)... I don't understand this multiple orgasm thing women talk about. 

Now that I'm back down from the clouds...normal decent steady drive again .... because we do it 4-5 times a week, pumping lasts anywhere from 6- 15 minutes now...and we need faster, harder to get there. 

It sounds FISHY to me... a woman getting off in 15 seconds *IF she needs LUBE*... if she is that "ready to go" - the LUBE would be abundant in her panties..(as this was my experience for 8 months straight, I could not get enough -I would have hog tied him down if he made me wait longer than 2 days, I NEEDED IT!!)....

Even today...although I rarely need lube...there are times I need to reach for it....(hate that)...and ....the times I DO need it... I take longer to get off......but that is JUST ME.


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## Cletus (Apr 27, 2012)

My wife is in the under 5 minutes club on a good day, and that's with no foreplay whatsoever. 15 seconds would be some kind of new world record, but I guess it just means she was already there in her head way before you started.


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## jaharthur (May 25, 2012)

We all know from prior threads that there's no such thing as a vaginal orgasm.


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## donny64 (Apr 21, 2012)

The Cro-Magnon said:


> It starts with F
> 
> and ends with E.


Sorry, but no, not it. I know full well the signs. She never fakes. No reason to as she has plenty of them, and is never in a hurry to finish. This was legit.

She's never needed any kind of lube, but (sorry for the graphic) without foreplay and the help of an inserted finger to help "distribute" her natural lube to just the outside, it can hurt or give her "wind burn" or "chapped lips" as she says. No different from any other woman I've been with. "Wet" does not automatically tranfer to the outside without a little help to distribute, if you get what I mean.


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## TrustInUs (Sep 9, 2012)

The only time I O very quickly w/o foreplay is when I am really really ready to go before he even touched me and no lube is needed. But I still think that took at least a couple of minutes. I do O quickly with oral unless he's teasing me, and even then it for me it's at least 3 minutes, but that's still with foreplay.


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## Coffee Amore (Dec 15, 2011)

15 seconds with no foreplay? Really?

I have never orgasmed in 15 to 20 seconds with no foreplay. The earliest would be a few minutes, maybe 4-5 minutes. No way could I orgasm without foreplay. None of the girlfriends of mine who talk about their sex lives have either. In fact, many of them take well over 10 minutes to come AND that's not counting the long foreplay before penetration.

I'm sorry but my first impression was that your wife is faking it and you're falling for it. Look at the scene from When Harry Met Sally (the deli scene). A woman can fake it very well if she wants to.


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## wiigirl (Jun 14, 2012)

5ish minutes by myself.....really horny about the same with a partner....usually say 10-15 minutes....


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## Zing (Nov 15, 2012)

It might be rare...but, I don't see why she should be faking it...esp when he states they're both happy with their sex lives and open  (one can fake the body movements, the expressions and the noises...but the throbbing/contractions that occurs in those areas just after - now, that can't be faked right...)

I can orgasm in 20-30 seconds too without any real foreplay if I'm already up for it (thanks to maybe a steamy scene from a movie or a romantic novel)...however, I must mention that the only way I can orgasm is with fingering and if I'm already revved up I'm generally there under a minute... I rarely take more than 2 minutes to reach an orgasm... if its been a while since I've had an orgasm I can have about 3 in a session (all by fingering only) 

If my head's not in it... then it can take me a few minutes to orgasm... either way I never try (or let hubby try) longer than a few minutes if its not happening...personally I find its better to leave it for a while and then come back to it rather than trying too hard to focus etc... that gives me leg pain as I feel my muscles tighten too hard before an orgasm... 

Oral causes me anything between a burning sensation to a moderate amount of stimulation/excitement...penetration causes me marginal stimulation (and I'm even having any sensation with PIV only in the last few months...that's after my drive increased and I accidentally found something that I realized is commonly referred to as the 'g-spot' lol ) 
prior to this PIV seemed to feel nothing beyond affectionate brushing between skin and skin... I had no sensations with PIV whatsoever...YET I used to be wet enough -even while LD!!! 
Strangely enough, ever since I turned HD there's a spot between my neck and shoulders now that arouses me even more than oral could ever ...Lord...my body's strange :slap:

This makes me think that everyone responds to different things differently...:scratchhead:


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## donny64 (Apr 21, 2012)

> I'm sorry but my first impression was that your wife is faking it and you're falling for it. Look at the scene from When Harry Met Sally (the deli scene). A woman can fake it very well if she wants to.


I realize some women are good at faking it, but that has never been the case with the W. I know the way her body moves, muscle contractions, and what she does when she's having an orgasm. Some women can put on a "good show", but there are things that simply can't be faked. If she's faking, she's likely the only woman alive that can face rapid anus contractions. And I know, because as soon as she starts with the "I'm coming" thing and her body starts convulsing in the way it does, I go right to putting a finger back there because it really sets her off and puts her right over the top.

Plus, she has more than her fair share of orgasms. It is typical for her to have at least 3 in a session, often more than that, and she is never in a hurry for me to get off. She'll have intercourse for as long as I can stand to keep going.

I'm beginning to wonder if it has something to do with kegals. About a year ago she started these exercises. That seems to coincide timing wise with her more rapid onset of orgasm. And this last time, she just felt GREAT inside. I've noticed the difference after her kegals, and she'll often do them during intercourse as well, but this time about all I can describe it as is she just felt very "snug" along the entire length of me when I was in her. Possibly because she was wet, but not overly so (she gets very wet naturally), but she just felt incredible inside. Must have something to do with her being able to feel more as well.


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## waiwera (Sep 8, 2009)

Donny64 you say you just got home... was their sexy talk/play in the car on the way home?
I'm just wondering if she wasn't already well on her way along the path of arousal by the time you got home.

In my case if there is lots of sexy chat and flirting (not necessarily anything physical) with hubby i can get really really turned on... cause I KNOW what's coming (pun intended)

Great news that the kegals are making a difference for you...and maybe for her too by the sounds of it!


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## Pandakiss (Oct 29, 2010)

If its been a week or so for oral on me, then it's a good chance I'm going to pop in a minute or so, sometimes I have that down side, if it's been a week, it will be longer. 

Typically 5 minutes if it's going into sex, maybe 10 minutes if he had a bj, or I'm returning the favor. 

The longest it can take is 30 minutes. Now PIV, it takes forever. I usually give up on that.


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## Jane_Doe (Aug 9, 2012)

Just from reading what you guys did, I can see how someone who's already 'fast' would go even faster. A couple of drinks maybe, a breeze from outside, the sense of urgency/desire... Sounds like a perfect night lol. Especially if you keep the sexual tension thing going on outside the bedroom.

My first one can take a couple of minutes, but then the 2nd can easily only take 20-30 seconds. I probably couldn't do a 0-finish in 15 seconds flat, but it sounds like fun to try! I think the muscles do have a lot to do with it too, I do have to tense the muscles 'down there' to really push me over the edge.


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## Phenix70 (May 6, 2012)

I can an reach orgasm in under 30 seconds, then continue to have multiples.
Not surprised your wife did as well.


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## Ano (Jun 7, 2012)

About a minute!


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## Carolynann1000 (Dec 10, 2012)

Hi,I am a newbie here.reading your posts,what is PIV please?


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## BjornFree (Aug 16, 2012)

penis in vagina


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## BjornFree (Aug 16, 2012)

or Pure, Innocent, Virgin.


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

I never counted how many seconds I can come, but I know I come very fast, sometimes just need a few thrusts. I think that's a few seconds. This happens when I haven't had sex for a few days, or after I watch porn. I can also come in my dream if I haven't had sex for a few days. 

Your wife is lucky and you are also lucky. You don't need to work hard, but both of you can have very satisfying sex.

For people who have doubts, I can tell you honestly, this does exist. Maybe you don't have it, but don't doubt it.


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## Playthang (Dec 3, 2012)

I can't orgasm at the speed of light. But I can get there in just a few minutes (usually 1-2). Especially if its been a few days. And I agree with Jane. Once that first lightning bolt hits its like the others just kick the door in! And they get more intense the more you have. And orgasms feel different depending on which area us being stimulated (clit/vag/ass). 
If a woman is REALLY TURNED ON maybe you can get her there more times faster? I'm early 40's and I haven't slowed down yet 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## donny64 (Apr 21, 2012)

Once she's going, I can get her into a near continuous orgasm if I'm paying attention and working to do that. She can have o's that seemingly last 5 minutes (haven't timed it, but they last a looonnggg damn time). But, it does take knowing when to speed up, slow down, and what things push her over the edge to keep them coming rapid fire, one stacked on top of another. Quite the experience for uus both, to be sure!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ohiodude (Jan 25, 2012)

In our relationship, it's a cruel paradox. We are in our early 50's, in good health and shape. She has lost some muscle tone down there, and I've lost some sensation (take longer.) She comes fast (a minute or two) flooding us with extra lube, making it even harder for me. Sometimes after several O's for her, I just give up. I'm very happy that I have a happy wf in that department, though - would feel terrible if SHE didn't.


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## Waking up to life (Nov 29, 2012)

I am infinitely jealous of all you.


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## Carolynann1000 (Dec 10, 2012)

Me too - have never had an o with PIV only oral sex.


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## jaquen (Mar 1, 2012)

Donny64, you'll get no general consensus on this topic. It's one of those TAM hot button issues that always ends the same. The factions all show up, they through their two cents in the ring, nobody really listens to each other, and everybody walks away believing what they came in already thinking.

Let me introduce you to the players:

*The Impossibles* - These wome have never experienced a quick orgasm, and certainly not a super quick orgasm from penetration. They will default to "she's faking it", and brand you as poor little man who doesn't really know his wife, and can't tell if she's faking. No matter what you say about your wife, you lose. 

*The Improbables *- These women, or the men who love them, will have one or two experiences that are close to your experience. They will mention that one time when they came so quickly that it shocked them, but will reiterate that this was a rare event that they don't know how to repeat. 

*The Quick Draws* - These women will say flat out that yes, this does exist, and it happens to them on a frequent enough basis. These people are the enemies to *The Impossibles*; their existence is typically ignored by them, or their truthfullness is called into question.

*The Opens *- These women haven't experienced it, but don't deny it can happen, and are very open to the possibility.

*The Clit Onlies* - These women might admit to being able to orgasm quickly, typically from oral sex, or a vibrator, directly on the clit. They don't experience orgasms in any other way, so while they'll admit to experiencing a fast orgasm, they can not relate to that happening under any other circumstances.

Know your players because knowing is half the battle.


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## donny64 (Apr 21, 2012)

> I could have gotten an Oscar nod for how well I used to fake it before I even learned how to have an orgasm.Women fake it all the time and the man has NO IDEA. In light of Jaquen's post,I'll openly admit to having "she's faking it" pop into my head when reading your post.But I will also say it's not impossible and she might really be cumming.


No offense, but you might have gotten an oscar from a guy who doesn't know what the heck he's doing and didn't know any better or know his woman...but then again, if he knew what he was doing, maybe you wouldn't of had a need to fake it in the first place?

There are some things that can't be faked, I don't care how good a woman thinks she is at faking it. It may work with the clueless, but not with someone who pays attention. But, that's half the battle to getting a woman to not want to fake it in the first place, so I can see how some guys fall for it and women think they could outdo "Sally". 



> My other thought was,cumming in 15 seconds...how on Earth can that be a satisfying bonding experience?To me the best part of sex is not about the orgasm.


You seem to be assuming that was her only one...that she was finished in that 15 seconds, and Mr. Minute Man was laying off to the side turning on ESPN and asking her to "fetch daddy a brewski and a bag o' cheetos" while she sat there with a "is that all there is?" look on her face.  Well that was certainly not, and never is the case. She gets hers, and a lot of them.



> In our relationship, it's a cruel paradox. We are in our early 50's, in good health and shape. She has lost some muscle tone down there, and I've lost some sensation (take longer.) She comes fast (a minute or two) flooding us with extra lube, making it even harder for me. Sometimes after several O's for her, I just give up. I'm very happy that I have a happy wf in that department, though - would feel terrible if SHE didn't.


You're not alone. I too lost sensativity, and she too lost some muscle tone. Kegals helped (though it is a very tricky convo to have). As did withdrawing once in a while (like during a change in position) and "getting rid" of some of the excess lube on me before starting again. It also helps to just abstain from any kind of sex or masturbation for a week or so every now and then. Seems to help bring back some sensativity. 

But, like you, I'm happy she has the experience, and I've just "given up" from time to time. Never felt bad about it or frustrated. She always takes care of me if not right then, the next opportunity. We just have too much good sex for me to feel sexually frustrated because I can't finish after she's had a great time, and after maybe a c0cktail or two too many for me (which kills sensativity for me).


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## ScarletBegonias (Jun 26, 2012)

donny64 said:


> No offense, but you might have gotten an oscar from a guy who doesn't know what the heck he's doing and didn't know any better or know his woman...but then again, if he knew what he was doing, maybe you wouldn't of had a need to fake it in the first place?
> 
> There are some things that can't be faked, I don't care how good a woman thinks she is at faking it. It may work with the clueless, but not with someone who pays attention. But, that's half the battle to getting a woman to not want to fake it in the first place, so I can see how some guys fall for it and women think they could outdo "Sally".
> 
> ...


WHY on earth you singled out my particular post is beyond me. But whatever 

Funny you assume men who can't tell just must clueless or inexperienced. What makes you such a sexual guru that you can tell? LOL it's heelarious when men think they know SO much about a woman and her orgasms

unless the woman is a squirter,sorry for the crude term,you have NO way of knowing for 100% certain.ALL the signs can be faked and they can be faked amazingly well.

And it's insulting that you assume just bc I had to fake it that the guy wasn't any good.Shows you know absolutely nothing about women and how their orgasms work.


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## Created2Write (Aug 25, 2011)

Well....jacquen, I think you hit the nail on the head with the different kinds of posters....

OP: Your wife sounds lucky. I orgasm vaginally, and I have multiples, but I have never come _that_ quickly. The quickest I have come was somewhere under a minute. 15 seconds? I think I'd go nuts.


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## Playthang (Dec 3, 2012)

I have a question on the whole faking issue. I for one don't do it plain & simple. If I am not in the mood, too tired or whatever the case may be, I would rather just tell my husband. But here's my question ... I can feel the fluids release at the time of orgasm and my husband feels it. There is also a set of pulses or muscle contractions along with some ringing in the ears (don't know if that's normal). So if I was to fake it how do you explain the lack of fluids & contractions? And don't you men "feel" when she comes? This is a serious question I am not trying to be a smartass.


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## donny64 (Apr 21, 2012)

ScarletBegonias said:


> WHY on earth you singled out my particular post is beyond me. But whatever
> 
> Funny you assume men who can't tell just must clueless or inexperienced. What makes you such a sexual guru that you can tell? LOL it's heelarious when men think they know SO much about a woman and her orgasms
> 
> unless the woman is a squirter,sorry for the crude term,you have NO way of knowing for 100% certain.ALL the signs can be faked and they can be faked amazingly well.


Haven't singled out yours. Go back and read the thread if you care to. I responded to it, you weren't "singled out".



> And it's insulting that you assume just bc I had to fake it that the guy wasn't any good.Shows you know absolutely nothing about women and how their orgasms work


But I do know. And that's not being c0cky either. I spent a lot of time figuring out how to please a woman. Proud of it? Yes. I love to please her, and it took some "work" to get there. I didn't sit back and assume I knew what I was doing (as I did when I was younger) and just assume I was a good lover. I put in the "work" and research. There are many benefits in it for both of us individually, and as a couple. 

What's "insulting" is women who fake orgasms and deceive men who are either poor in bed, clueless, or just don't care just so they can "get him off of me", or who present themselves as something they're not (i.e. satisfied in bed, desiring sex, having a good time, etc., etc.). 

What's also "insulting" is women who believe that men can't possibly know "about a woman and her orgasms". Funny how there have been more than one woman who said "I can't cum like that" or "I can't do that" who subsequently DID just that after some time (my W included) because I believed she could. I'd say she's pretty freakin' satisfied I "knew" a little more about "women and their orgasms" than she did. In fact, if you listen to her, she STILL finds it hard to believe an orgasm via foot massage is possible, even though she has experienced it. 

Ya know, sorry if that comes off as c0cky, but it gets old on here to see the "clitoral orgasm only after one hour of oral" or "hitachi wand" group come on here and throw out the "she's faking" routine time and again just because they can't do the same.

You may "know" about your body and orgasms, you don't know any more than I do about other women and theirs.

BTW, W is a squirter (not in this instance though). Another thing she said was "not possible" with her. Hmmmm.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

15 minutes probably. This is after giving birth the 2nd time. 

No worries though. We dont' mind.


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## jaquen (Mar 1, 2012)

Why do people get so emotional, vitriolic, and close minded (on all sides) when it comes to this topic?


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## ScarletBegonias (Jun 26, 2012)

jaquen said:


> Why do people get so emotional, vitriolic, and close minded (on all sides) when it comes to this topic?


My response became that way as a direct result of how OP chose to reply to my original comment. Giving a personal opinion on a very personal subject matter and getting a smarta$$,c**ksure reply that makes OP seem as though he feels he's a resident expert on the inner workings of a female orgasm is a sure way to get someone worked up.


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## jaquen (Mar 1, 2012)

ScarletBegonias said:


> Women fake it because men feel it's all about getting a woman to cum. Puts an extreme amount of pressure on the woman knowing her man's ego will be crushed if she doesn't get there.Knowing a man will internalize it as "I'm bad in bed,she didn't cum" is why most women fake it. Doesn't mean their man is bad or she's deceiving him,it's usually to spare his ego and MOST women will say it isn't the end of the world if she doesn't cum every single time and it still feels great regardless...if men could accept that,there would be no need to fake it ever


I understand why some women fake. It even seems noble.

But it still is wrong. It does nothing to advance sexual satisfaction between men and women, and ultimately it serves no real purpose.

Men don't get to learn women better if faking is present, women don't get any more open with their men, or their own sexuality, and lies ultimately do nothing but harm.

I think, well intentioned as it may be, it's ultimately wrong to fake.

It's similar to how I feel about men who hide porn and masturbation. I understand why they do it, it's often for noble reasons (i.e. not to hurt the woman's fragile ego), but in the end it's a bad idea, and doesn't further the dialogue necessary to get all parties on the same page.


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## ScarletBegonias (Jun 26, 2012)

Stepping back from the conversation though bc I'd like to not get banned.OP can continue on with his way of thinking,not my job to change it. If his wife is in fact cumming in 15 seconds,that's awesome for both of them and hopefully he doesn't get so defensive and in her face when she gives opinions on questions he asks.


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## jaquen (Mar 1, 2012)

ScarletBegonias said:


> My response became that way as a direct result of how OP chose to reply to my original comment. Giving a personal opinion on a very personal subject matter and getting a smarta$$,c**ksure reply that makes OP seem as though he feels he's a resident expert on the inner workings of a female orgasm is a sure way to get someone worked up.


That's just bad post positioning. I wasn't calling out your post specifically, but dealing with the overall reactions this topic always receives.

Sorry if it appeared that way.


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## ScarletBegonias (Jun 26, 2012)

jaquen said:


> I understand why some women fake. It even seems noble.
> 
> But it still is wrong. It does nothing to advance sexual satisfaction between men and women, and ultimately it serves no real purpose.
> 
> ...


Jaquen I have tons of respect for you and I think you are one of the most reasonable men here. But on this,we'll just have to not see eye to eye. Peace.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

My husband learned that I can enjoy sex WITHOUT orgasming. He stopped worrying if I will cum. We just enjoy the acts of sexual contact. It took a while for him to understand, but I can be just as fulfilled without orgasming. It doesn't mean his body is inadequate at all...it's just not a NECESSITY for me to cum. Sometimes I do, sometimes it's multiple, sometimes it's not at all, but I always mentally desire him. For me it's about being THAT CLOSE to him. Pleasing him. He pleases me in ways that don't stress me out to orgasm. It's a good situation and understanding for us. I won't fake an orgasm though. I'm just straightforward.

Sometimes there is that surprise orgasm which I love, but lately, I've just accepted that my body is changing and there's nothing I can do. Why stress about it? Just flow with the changes and enjoy every moment of closeness.


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## Coffee Amore (Dec 15, 2011)

jaquen said:


> Why do people get so emotional, vitriolic, and close minded (on all sides) when it comes to this topic?


I hope I wasn't closeminded. I was giving my first impression. I suspect the strong reaction to such posts come from the fact that the original posts in such threads often come across as a humble brag.


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## donny64 (Apr 21, 2012)

ScarletBegonias said:


> Women fake it because men feel it's all about getting a woman to cum. Puts an extreme amount of pressure on the woman knowing her man's ego will be crushed if she doesn't get there.Knowing a man will internalize it as "I'm bad in bed,she didn't cum" is why most women fake it. Doesn't mean their man is bad or she's deceiving him,it's usually to spare his ego and MOST women will say it isn't the end of the world if she doesn't cum every single time and it still feels great regardless...if men could accept that,there would be no need to fake it ever.


You might be surprised to find agree with you. To some extent anyway. Some men DO make it about ego, and put pressure on their women to orgasm. The smart ones don't, because no person, especially women, can get to a truly relaxed place where some of these kinds of orgasms are possible if they're feeling pressured. The "trick" is to help them get there without pressure, and without making them feel you're trying to get them to accomplish the "impossible". Only by making it about them and their pleasure can you get there. And THAT is incredibly bonding and satisfying. 

Why do so many women want to throw out the "ego" card when a man tries to please a woman? It couldn't possibly be because we just want you to be happy, feel great and fulfilled, right? I suppose it is also "ego" when I try ti make her feel good and connected by buying flowers, making dinner, or taking her out on a romantic trip. By being a gentleman. By working to make her happy by being the best man he can be in all areas (to include the bedroom) because she deserves it. Or is that just "work" to try and get laid....so we can feed our egos?



> And regardless of how insulting it is, you're not a woman.You don't know jack about being a woman and couldn't possibly speak for a woman.ANY woman.


I have enough insight to know that most women do not know "jack" about what they themselves want. They THINK they know (hence the "if he would help around the house more" or "just stop bothering me about it I'd be in the mood more" comments, only to be proven WRONG by the guys who have a freakin' clue. We see it on these boards daily. "Low drive" women who say these things to their husbands, but when the husband finally gets a clue, stops doing what she THINKS she "wants", and does what other men here tell him she really wants, things improve? Yup, us clueless men that don't "know" women alright... 

This all begs one question though. If you don't need orgasms to have such a wonderfully bonding experience, why fake? How much "bonding" would your guy feel you're actually doing if he found you were LYING to him and DECEIVING in the middle of this "bonding" experience?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

I know what I want!! My H knows what I want. He obliges nicely


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