# Admitted/Busted/Committed?



## cb45 (Oct 2, 2009)

Was wondering how the numbers shake out here on these ABC's.

*A*dmitted/*B*usted/*C*ommitted

that is to say, how many folks actually have their mates (or u)
fess up before the SO even knows whats going on???
(how do u handle the "outta nowhere shock/surprise)

seems to me, most fall under the "busted" category.
(be it u or them)

also curious how admitted vs busted plays into the "i'm still
committed" phase for either the LS, DS, or both.
(for i notice a trend here but want to ck it out to see if its so)


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## cb45 (Oct 2, 2009)

rolled again? lets try night-time crowd (in USA that is). 
here goes............


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

Busted, and completely by accident. I ignored the red flags.


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## Waiting4RightTyme (May 12, 2011)

First time, EA (possibly PA) happened and I found out by accident and busted him. Said he was committed to me and would do ANYTHING to save the marriage. This was 2 years ago. He kept contact with her over the 2 years sporadically through texts until this past Mother's Day when the texts became almost nonstop with that same woman ... ugh! I busted him again since I was monitoring the phone records. He's now changed all his passwords to his emails and Facebook but still denies the EA - says they're just friends ... yeah, right. I had let the sporadic texts slide, but I'm done with him now.


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## cb45 (Oct 2, 2009)

ouch. sorry to hear/read it.


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## SecretTears (Jul 18, 2010)

busted!! It took a while after a year or so of him lying but I finally got my evidence. He says he's committed but I will believe it when I see it.


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## AppleDucklings (Mar 27, 2011)

I busted mine. I started becoming suspicious that something was not right back in Oct 2010 after I found some very sexual text messages between him and OW. He played it off as he was just being stupid and "lost in a moment" but he was sorry. My red flag alert started flying then. I had no proof he did anything wrong other than that text but I kept an eye on him. I soon became suspicious of yet another woman (a different one from whom he was sending the sex texts to) It took me about 4 months but I busted him. He is now in a full blown "we're just friends" affair with her. Even though he has been busted, even though he has admitted to having a sexual relationship with her, he still continues to claim the "just friends" line. It's like he cant stop lying. Far as I go, I am done and I am hoping the divorce will be final sometime next week.


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## sigma1299 (May 26, 2011)

I let myself get busted but only because I was too chicken to just stand up and my EA. I wanted it to quit because I knew I loved my wife and what I was doing to her. So, once I got busted I was already committed to my marriage and wanted reconciliation more than anything, which I think is a little different from where most WS are when they get busted.


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## 2xloser (May 8, 2011)

I busted mine, although when I confronted her I had very little evidence and thought I was busting less of an ongoing A than it actually was. She admitted to more than I could prove. 
Trickle-truth over the course of about 3 days.
Working toward R, but unknown where it will end up, 31 days post DDay.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

In my case, we both admitted.


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## cb45 (Oct 2, 2009)

am curious JB, who cheated 1st? him or u? or was it a case of 
both were cheating & didnt know (for sure) what the other was
doing (or cared?).

and if 2nd answer is the case, why admit?


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