# When a woman uses "that" and "particularly" when dissing you



## Bob Barker (3 mo ago)

Why does she do that? Why not put a blank on it? 

Not. 

It must be intentional, right? She's done it twice now.


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## Tdbo (Sep 8, 2019)

If you desire input, more context appears necessary.


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## BeyondRepair007 (Nov 4, 2021)

Bob Barker said:


> Why does she do that? Why not put a blank on it?
> 
> Not.
> 
> It must be intentional, right? She's done it twice now.


Yea, what @Tdbo said. More info needed.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

It's Bob!!

What @Tdbo said.


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

These Swedes are hard work.


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## DudeInProgress (Jun 10, 2019)

Bob Barker said:


> Why does she do that? Why not put a blank on it?
> 
> Not.
> 
> It must be intentional, right? She's done it twice now.


What the hell are you talking about?


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## Loves Coffee (4 mo ago)

Bob Barker said:


> Why does she do that? Why not put a blank on it?
> 
> Not.
> 
> It must be intentional, right? She's done it twice now.


Yes


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## BigDaddyNY (May 19, 2021)

Bob Barker said:


> Why does she do that? Why not put a blank on it?
> 
> Not.
> 
> It must be intentional, right? She's done it twice now.


Definitely intentional. She just isn't the put a blank on it type of girl. She must that and particularly when dissing. I can really see her point too.


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## *Deidre* (Feb 7, 2016)

_That_ makes no sense,_ particularly_ when you say...._that._ 

Yep, I'm going to start using this.


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## RebuildingMe (Aug 18, 2019)

I hate when they put a blank on it!


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## BeyondRepair007 (Nov 4, 2021)

I suddenly love this thread 🤣


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## Bob Barker (3 mo ago)

Tdbo said:


> If you desire input, more context appears necessary.


First time around I suggested that we meet. "I am not that interested in that". Instead of not interested.. Okey..

Almost a year later we have a rather brief exchange and she writes: I am not particularly interested in talking to you.

So my question is why is she prefacing it with "that" and "particularly", instead of just a blank no? 

I'm not saying she's bluffing, but am I the only one who finds it a bit odd?


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## BeyondRepair007 (Nov 4, 2021)

Bob Barker said:


> First time around I suggested that we meet. "I am not that interested in that". Instead of not interested.. Okey..
> 
> Almost a year later we have a rather brief exchange and she writes: I am not particularly interested in talking to you.
> 
> ...


It’s not odd.
She’s not into you.
Move on.


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## Bob Barker (3 mo ago)

BeyondRepair007 said:


> It’s not odd.
> She’s not into you.
> Move on.


Why is she prefacing it if she's not?


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## BeyondRepair007 (Nov 4, 2021)

Bob Barker said:


> Why is she prefacing it if she's not?


It’s the way she talks.
Nothing more. Forget about it.


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## Bob Barker (3 mo ago)

Loves Coffee said:


> Yes


What is her purpose?


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## RebuildingMe (Aug 18, 2019)

Bob Barker said:


> First time around I suggested that we meet. "I am not that interested in that". Instead of not interested.. Okey..
> 
> Almost a year later we have a rather brief exchange and she writes: I am not particularly interested in talking to you.
> 
> ...


More disturbing is that you’ve been in communication with a woman for a year that apparently doesn’t like you very much.


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## Bob Barker (3 mo ago)

*Deidre* said:


> _That_ makes no sense,_ particularly_ when you say...._that._
> 
> Yep, I'm going to start using this.


I don't particularly like your post.


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

Bob Barker said:


> "Almost a year later we have a brief exchange" does not mean: we have been in communicaiton for a year.
> 
> You need an IQ boost.


To be honest I’m pretty certain that she’s crazy about you and is just playing hard to get. Try again in a couple of years and I’m sure she will be happy to talk nicely to you.


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## Bob Barker (3 mo ago)

Andy1001 said:


> To be honest I’m pretty certain that she’s crazy about you and is just playing hard to get. Try again in a couple of years and I’m sure she will be happy to talk nicely to you.


Do you say: I don't particularly like Hitler?


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## DudeInProgress (Jun 10, 2019)

Bob Barker said:


> First time around I suggested that we meet. "I am not that interested in that". Instead of not interested.. Okey..
> 
> Almost a year later we have a rather brief exchange and she writes: I am not particularly interested in talking to you.
> 
> ...


There’s nothing odd about it. She’s telling you clearly and overtly that she’s not interested in you. Move on


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## *Deidre* (Feb 7, 2016)

She may have wanted to spare your feelings - so, she is saying “no” in a less offensive/flat way.


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## BeyondRepair007 (Nov 4, 2021)

Bob Barker said:


> Do you say: I don't particularly like Hitler?


I don’t particularly like Hitler.

Care to guess what that means?


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Bob Barker said:


> What is her purpose?


Sometimes, when a person is uncomfortable with what's being discussed, they use a lot of words to say it.

"No" is very direct and harsh. A lot of people have a problem with being harsh when they talk. So, they string more words together to say "No" indirectly.

That's what it is... her trying to soften her "No" or "Not interested". It indicates that she's uncomfortable with what she is replying to.


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## Bob Barker (3 mo ago)

BeyondRepair007 said:


> I don’t particularly like Hitler.
> 
> Care to guess what that means?


*Particularly*
/pəˈtɪkjʊləli/

_adverb_

1.
to a higher degree than is usual or average.


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## DudeInProgress (Jun 10, 2019)

Bob Barker said:


> Do you say: I don't particularly like Hitler?


Maybe. Spend some time with Brits, they have a wonderful knack for understatement.

Dude, there’s nothing unusual here, and no hidden messaging or agenda. 
She doesn’t like you. Stop ****ing over-analyzing it and looking for secret meanings that aren’t there.


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## RebuildingMe (Aug 18, 2019)

I don’t _that _she _particularly _likes you at all.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Bob Barker said:


> *Particularly*
> /pəˈtɪkjʊləli/
> 
> _adverb_
> ...


Yes, I would say that everyone who dislikes Hitler, dislikes him at a higher degree than is usual or average. There is nothing "usual" or "average" about the feeling of dislike most people have for Hitler.

There are plenty of people I know who I dislike. But I can tell you that I don't dislike any of them as much as I dislike Hitler.


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## Ursula (Dec 2, 2016)

Bob Barker said:


> "Almost a year later we have a brief exchange" does not mean: we have been in communicaiton for a year.
> 
> *You need an IQ boost.*


Did you mean that to be particularly demeaning?


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## Lynnevicious (Apr 25, 2021)

Well, if you know the definition of ‘particularly’, then you’ll know that she feels strongly about not pursuing anything with you. 

Rejection hurts. Sorry. But Don’t read too much into nuances when the meaning is clear.


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## Tdbo (Sep 8, 2019)

Bob Barker said:


> What is her purpose?


To convey to you that your services are not required.


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## Bob Barker (3 mo ago)

Tdbo said:


> To convey to you that your services are not required.


That's more like it.


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## BeyondRepair007 (Nov 4, 2021)

Tdbo said:


> To convey to you that your services are not required.


Sweet! I guess it just takes the exact right combination of words sometimes.


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## Bob Barker (3 mo ago)

BeyondRepair007 said:


> Sweet! I guess it just takes the exact right combination of words sometimes.


I don't particularly care for your posts. But I do care for you, just so you know.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

*Deidre* said:


> _That_ makes no sense,_ particularly_ when you say...._that._
> 
> Yep, I'm going to start using this.


It's a trap! I wish I had that star wars gif.


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## BeyondRepair007 (Nov 4, 2021)

Bob Barker said:


> I don't particularly care for your posts. But I do care for you, just so you know.


No worries, lots of people don’t like my posts and lots don’t _particularly_ like me either. 

But I am glad you got the answer you needed.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

Bob Barker said:


> I don't particularly care for your posts. But I do care for you, just so you know.


Hahaha....haha...
No school today?


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## Bob Barker (3 mo ago)

BeyondRepair007 said:


> But I am glad you got the answer you needed.


I'm not that glad.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

Bob Barker said:


> I'm not that glad.


We are. You're doing great. Glad, glad, glad....


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## BeyondRepair007 (Nov 4, 2021)

Bob Barker said:


> I'm not that glad.


Wrong answer huh? Sorry dude. That’s life. Find a new one.


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## Bob Barker (3 mo ago)

EleGirl said:


> Yes, I would say that everyone who dislikes Hitler, dislikes him at a higher degree than is usual or average. There is nothing "usual" or "average" about the feeling of dislike most people have for Hitler.
> 
> There are plenty of people I know who I dislike. But I can tell you that I don't dislike any of them as much as I dislike Hitler.


What do you think about me? Watch your words!


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## RebuildingMe (Aug 18, 2019)

Ragnar Ragnasson said:


> It's a trap! I wish I had that star wars gif.


Did someone call for the Admiral?


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## Bob Barker (3 mo ago)

I am not particularly needy. Just so you guys know.

Since particularly doesn't denote levels according to you guys, I am not needy.


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## BigDaddyNY (May 19, 2021)

Bob Barker said:


> Do you say: I don't particularly like Hitler?


Right, so she likes you a little better than Hitler.

Why are you trying this hard to twist a woman's words so that you think she is into you?


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## Bob Barker (3 mo ago)

BigDaddyNY said:


> Right, so she likes you a little better than Hitler.
> 
> Why are you trying this hard to twist a woman's words so that you think she is into you?


That's what the words mean.. If she didn't intend that, WHY did she write it. She is not a nice person, so that theory can be thrown in the bin.


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## BigDaddyNY (May 19, 2021)

Bob Barker said:


> That's what the words mean.. If she didn't intend that, WHY did she write it. She is not a nice person, so that theory can be thrown in the bin.


Imagine a bit of disdain for you as a human in her voice as she says those things and you will understand what she meant.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

Bob Barker said:


> That's what the words mean.. If she didn't intend that, WHY did she write it. She is not a nice person, so that theory can be thrown in the bin.


So why, in theory, do you even care about it?


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## Bob Barker (3 mo ago)

"


Ragnar Ragnasson said:


> So why, in theory, do you even care about it?


I like it rough


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## BigDaddyNY (May 19, 2021)

Bob Barker said:


> That's what the words mean.. If she didn't intend that, WHY did she write it. She is not a nice person, so that theory can be thrown in the bin.


Also, I think you are misinterpruting the meanings.

You posted this
*Particularly*
_/pəˈtɪkjʊləli/

adverb_

_1.
to a higher degree than is usual or average_.


So that means she REALLY, REALLY, isn't interested in talking to you. She doesn't want to talk to even more than other guys she doesn't want to talk to. You must be particularly annoying to her.


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## Teacherwifemom (5 mo ago)

BigDaddyNY said:


> Definitely intentional. She just isn't the put a blank on it type of girl. She must that and particularly when dissing. I can really see her point too.


Omg I just snort laughed!


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

Bob Barker said:


> "
> 
> 
> I like it rough


Particularly?


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## Tdbo (Sep 8, 2019)

Bob Barker said:


> So my question is why is she prefacing it with "that" and "particularly", instead of just a blank no


Perhaps she thought it a tad more civil than asking you if the letters "F" and "O" mean anything to you.


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## Bob Barker (3 mo ago)

I am trying to think of the nicest thing she said to me..


BigDaddyNY said:


> Also, I think you are misinterpruting the meanings.
> 
> You posted this
> *Particularly*
> ...


"NOT particularly" means not to a higher degree than is usual or average. I would have figured it was lower than that.. like zero..


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## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

Bob Barker said:


> WHY did she write it.


It doesn't matter. Move along. Just pass me her number. I'm 100% sure I'll do particularly better about that than you.


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

Bob Barker said:


> First time around I suggested that we meet. "I am not that interested in that". Instead of not interested.. Okey..
> 
> Almost a year later we have a rather brief exchange and she writes: I am not particularly interested in talking to you.
> 
> ...


Apparently you haven't taken no for an answer or you wouldn't still be trying so now she's trying to emphasize that she is not interested and for you to leave her alone and that is what you need to do.


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## Bob Barker (3 mo ago)

DownByTheRiver said:


> Apparently you haven't taken no for an answer or you wouldn't still be trying so now she's trying to emphasize that she is not interested and for you to leave her alone and that is what you need to do.


No just means try harder.


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## RebuildingMe (Aug 18, 2019)

Bob Barker said:


> No just means try harder.


That’s what we call a stalker.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

Bob Barker said:


> No just means try harder.


Thanks. You're confirmed.


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

Bob Barker said:


> No just means try harder.


Only if you're a creeper.


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## Personal (Jan 16, 2014)

Bob Barker said:


> What do you think about me?


Not particularly.


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## Livvie (Jan 20, 2014)

OP is banned 🤣


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## Tdbo (Sep 8, 2019)

Livvie said:


> OP is banned 🤣


Tomorrow, he will be Pat Sajac.


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

We all use idioms when we speak.
Idioms are specific words, maybe phrases, that are used, repeatedly.

These idioms can actually become dialects, where a whole community uses them.

Some young people insistently use "like", or, "you know", where ever they can squeeze it in.

Concentrate, less on the words, more on the general import, or context.

I agree with the others, this lady does not want to be in any sort of relationship with you.

Let her go, find another lady.

Do not get in the weeds (or lost) with words.

For example, some people *who are on the spectrum* get lost in the words.
Words, their specific meaning, their context, and the why.


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

Bob Barker said:


> Why is she prefacing it if she's not?


Sounds to me like she is blantly saying you bore her and she loathes you.


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## Laurentium (May 21, 2017)

Our mothers bore us.


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## DudeInProgress (Jun 10, 2019)

Bob Barker said:


> No just means try harder.


Are you on the spectrum? Serious question, because if you are then you have an excuse for this abject lack of social calibration. And it can be learned, so I would encourage you to research programs and resources to develop social calibration.

“No” never means “try harder.”
Ie either means:
1. NO, I don’t like you, and I’m not going to like you.
or
2. I’m testing you to see how you respond.

if you respond immediately with complete confidence and some sort of teasing, cocky-funny response, perhaps I’ll continue the interaction and see where it goes.
if you “try harder“ or over-analyze the situation, or act overly invested, or too interested, i’ll just think you’re a try-hard loser who is not at my level and not worth my time.


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## Personal (Jan 16, 2014)

DudeInProgress said:


> Are you on the spectrum? Serious question, because if you are then you have an excuse for this abject lack of social calibration. And it can be learned, so I would encourage you to research programs and resources to develop social calibration.
> 
> “No” never means “try harder.”
> Ie either means:
> ...





Livvie said:


> OP is banned 🤣


Crickets, 🦗 @DudeInProgres?


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