# Men lost sexual interest?



## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

Ok guys, I am just curious, as I see some women here have posted that their husbands have lost Sexual interest in them.

Why is this? I am a very sexual person, couldn't stand the idea of not having sex with my wife for longer then a couple of days.

So how can certain men lose interest in sex with their wives? Is it a physical thing? Mental? both? Hormonal?

I'm not talking about women losing interest or refusing to have sex with their Husbands, I am enquiring to why men would just lose interest in sex? AS in Not having an affair...just no sex?

I am just curious to this, thanks in advace if you answer.


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## draconis (Oct 3, 2007)

For me most of anything is due to my MD and the fact I have a low labido. I enjoy sex but it isn't important to have the physical contact. What is important is the relationship part, for which I am lucky my wife and I have a great sex life but I don't feel the need/want to chase her around the house to "get some." Most people I think it is a mental thing. The longer you go without the less you want or feel the need for it. The more you have the more you want it. 

draconis


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## swedish (Mar 6, 2008)

hmmm....interesting question...I think for my ex it was beer and star trek till late into the night...every night.


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## Amplexor (Feb 13, 2008)

Good one Swedish!!! Let me see, sex or Spock, hmmmm


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## swedish (Mar 6, 2008)

dang...now you're making me think I could have put on some pointy ears and saved that marriage !!!


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## mhg25 (May 31, 2008)

For me just having the constant nagging and critiquing turns me off. My wife also doesn't seam into sex that much at least foreplay since she just lays there surfing the internet while I try to get things started. On top of that whenever we do have a fight about sex I am always being painted out to be the person who wants it and she is doing a service for me when she knows she wants it too. Major turn off. Be happy to have a wife interested enough to help initiate sex. Some women are not grateful for a husband's high libido.


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## Zebolt (Jun 1, 2008)

I've had bouts of something like this. For me it's mostly been due to one of the following:

1. Low self-esteem. I worked while my wife finished college, and now she's working while I go to college full-time. I do chores around the house and all that, but I still feel inadequate because I'm not making any green. That, and not feeling particularly good-looking, is not good for the libido.

2. Due to sleep apnea, I have high blood pressure, which requires medication, which I've noticed to have an effect on my ability to stay hard unless I'm very very stimulated.

3. Emotional distance issues in the relationship.


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## Deejo (May 20, 2008)

Stress
Depression
self-esteem
respect (lack of, for partner or self)
Negative perceptions - doesn't meet needs, real or imagined.


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## Green-Moo (Feb 5, 2008)

swedish said:


> hmmm....interesting question...I think for my ex it was beer and star trek till late into the night...every night.




Hmmm .... perhaps I can figure at least part of the reason why this guy is described as your ex!

This might sounds weird, but I think sex can be like a habit. If you don't have it for a while you sort of forget about it.


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

Hey swedish, there is a hotel in NJ that has "themed rooms" and one of them is a star trek room. My buddy and girlfriend booked it for a night and she adorned a star trek women's costume...LOL...I died laughing when he told me about it, he thought it was the greatst night of his life.


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## draconis (Oct 3, 2007)

Deejo said:


> Stress
> Depression
> self-esteem
> respect (lack of, for partner or self)
> Negative perceptions - doesn't meet needs, real or imagined.


:iagree:

draconis


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## swedish (Mar 6, 2008)

GAsoccerman said:


> Hey swedish, there is a hotel in NJ that has "themed rooms" and one of them is a star trek room. My buddy and girlfriend booked it for a night and she adorned a star trek women's costume...LOL...I died laughing when he told me about it, he thought it was the greatst night of his life.


A few months ago I was at a local pizza place/bar with my husband, brother in law and a guy he works with (single guy) and a group of teachers came in so I said "Maybe there are some single ladies over there. Guess which one is the school nurse?" They all looked around and had no idea. I just started laughing because she was wearing a top that was like colorful scrubs and I said what do you think a nurse looks like? The white nurse hat with the red cross? What nurses are you guys watching? They all laughed and were like 'no, no we just didn't see her' Yeah, right  

Anyway, I got one of these costumes and sent some pics to my husband...he almost had to leave work...feeling ill...need to see the nurse  But Star Trek....hmmm....no way!


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

Hey Swedish feel free to E-mail me the Nurses pics of yourself as well.....LOL

My wife has taken pics of...

The Nurse
Naughty school girl
The pharmacist
The secrectary (sp?)
The Dominitrix (sp?)
Irish outfit
Christmas outfits (3 of them)
hooker outfit
Snow white
Ragedy Anne 
Witch

our next photo shoot is her french maid costume, that will be in a few weeks.

It is allot of fun since I am big into photography, I love taking pics and she likes to model for me.

I literally have thousands of pics of my wife, most are very nice...a couple hundrend are naughty and on a seperate external hard drive for my private collection.

But it is a strong connection when you both can do that....Kudo's

Three wishes web site has some great outfits.


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## swedish (Mar 6, 2008)

GAsoccerman said:


> Hey Swedish feel free to E-mail me the Nurses pics of yourself as well.....LOL


so NOT gonna happen!

hmmm...since I work from home, when he calls and asks what I'm doing I'll talk about work and then say and threw a load of laundry in...in my french maid outfit....may need to check out that website add that one to my collection...he's due for some new pics


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

LOL I wouldn't expect it anyway...I am sure you know it was a playful jest on here.

But yea that sounds good, he would love that...All guys would love that, that is part of the lure.

We married our wives because we think they are sexy....So when my wife is a little playful in that area....it refuels that "hottness" factor 1000%.

I usually think that is the biggest issue for couples, they feel they need to "act" a certain way after marriage and kids.....its so darn fun sneaking away from the kids to go make out in the hallway....just like teenagers away from her parents. LOL

Enjoy the site! we love it.


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## Hurricane (Jun 7, 2008)

WHen I first got married, I had a high libido. My wife on the other hand did not. Over time, I gave up on trying to initiate, which led to just not caring anymore. Honestly, I can't remember the last time we did anything.


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## MEM (Sep 15, 2008)

Soccerman, I agree with you on that sex is like a habit. More you have it in your life the more you want it. You can forget about for awhile, but when you don't have it for a looong time, you try to forget about it but it still resurfaces. Kinda like a smoking habit.


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

Hurricane-
So you have just given up? Do you not really miss it all that much?


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## peachfuzz40 (Oct 8, 2008)

draconis said:


> For me most of anything is due to my MD and the fact I have a low labido. I enjoy sex but it isn't important to have the physical contact. What is important is the relationship part, for which I am lucky my wife and I have a great sex life but I don't feel the need/want to chase her around the house to "get some." Most people I think it is a mental thing. The longer you go without the less you want or feel the need for it. The more you have the more you want it.
> 
> draconis


As a MD, shouldn't you know how to spell libido?


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## soultempest (Apr 1, 2008)

I think I can be sexual. I know I want to be. My wife has become very much like a family member to me. Like a buddy, or even a sister. I simply do not see her in a sexual light. There is nothing wrong with her body. It just does not appeal to me. We have tried to spice it up, and I still fail at it. She does not have the same problem with me. 

I just can't. Just thinking about it puts me off. It's been like that almost from day one (which is 10 years now), so you can imagine our frustration. We probably "try" it, just to please her, maybe 2 or 3 times a year. 
That is why I find myself in the predicament that I am.


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## swedish (Mar 6, 2008)

Although he is also affectionately known on this site as the Dr. of Love


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

OHHHHH SNAP! :rofl:


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## serenity220 (Apr 3, 2009)

Zebolt said:


> I've had bouts of something like this. For me it's mostly been due to one of the following:
> 
> 1. Low self-esteem. I worked while my wife finished college, and now she's working while I go to college full-time. I do chores around the house and all that, but I still feel inadequate because I'm not making any green. That, and not feeling particularly good-looking, is not good for the libido.
> 
> ...


So can I ask the men then, if the above is happening to my husband, and itsbeen happening for years. How can we fix/change it. 

I want to be intimate with my husband again, but I don't know how to help him/us.

Are we suppose to just put up with having sex once every 4mths. Its not you, it's me speech. It's true I guess, but still makes me feel like crap. 

Appreciate the guys point of views : ) Sorry for jumping in


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## Alecram (Apr 3, 2009)

GAsoccerman said:


> Hey swedish, there is a hotel in NJ that has "themed rooms" and one of them is a star trek room. My buddy and girlfriend booked it for a night and she adorned a star trek women's costume...LOL...I died laughing when he told me about it, he thought it was the greatst night of his life.


What hotel is that GA?


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

I sent a e-mail to my friends an dhe gave me a link to the hotel....looks like fun...:smthumbup:

Feather Nest Inn


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## MMA_FIGHTER (Feb 2, 2009)

i always do my own laundry...been doin it forever and my wife always tells me that she would do it for me but, some habits are hard to break. every now and then before i go to bed ill put something in the washer and since she goes to bed later than me ill ask her to throw it in the dryer for me and of course she forgets and i have to wear a damp uniform to work...when you want things done right you gotta do it yourself....


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## Unknown (Apr 26, 2009)

Hi I'm new here.

My husband and I have been together for 6 years, 2 of them married. When we were dating, we never had sex much because we lived with our parents. Even after being married, I noticed that we never really had sex either. 

For the first month we were married, i noticed that he did want to have sex but I believe i was depressed and never wanted it. It soon became this "power" thing that we used on each other and ultimately, we just never had sex. Today, we'll probably do it once or twice a month if even. I'm going on 26 and he 31. I've brought the topic to his attention a few times...In fact, I've tried to initiate the mood many times but always turned down. Do you have any advice.....I'll propose new things but he doesn't seem to care too much to make our sex life more interesting..either way, I want to make him happy but I'm scared of always being turned down.....and honestly, it makes me feel like he is unattracted to me (he doesn't give me any reason that he is cheating)


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## Farfignewton (Aug 10, 2008)

I have had this problem with my husband for over a year now. I am getting to the point where I am considering cheating on him. I have tried everything under the sun to try to entice him, but nothing works. I am not unattractive. I just got offered to be a ring girl for an upcoming wrestling event that will occur a month from now. I do not understand what the hell his problem is!? According to him, there is no problem. 

I really don't want to cheat. I want to have a satisfying sex life with my husband. After trying for this long, I can see that it will never change. He will be happy to sit on the couch and watch t.v. all night while I sit there totally unsatisfied. I used to never look at other men and now I am staring temptation in the face everywhere I go. I go to college and literally get hit on daily. 

My patience is starting to wear thin.


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

Hurricane said:


> WHen I first got married, I had a high libido. My wife on the other hand did not. Over time, I gave up on trying to initiate, which led to just not caring anymore. Honestly, I can't remember the last time we did anything.


basically the same for me except at first my wife did have a high libido as well. i have given up because for me it is easier than obsessing, worrying and hoping all the time, it has relieved alot of stress off of me. i wish it could be different but i have come to grips with it


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

okeydokie said:


> i have given up because for me it is easier than obsessing, worrying and hoping all the time, it has relieved alot of stress off of me. i wish it could be different but i have come to grips with it


Could you expand on the above a bit more? I am very interested to know what form the "giving up" has taken, and what effect this has had, both on you and her.


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## Changes (Apr 26, 2009)

soultempest said:


> I think I can be sexual. I know I want to be. My wife has become very much like a family member to me. Like a buddy, or even a sister. I simply do not see her in a sexual light. There is nothing wrong with her body. It just does not appeal to me. We have tried to spice it up, and I still fail at it. She does not have the same problem with me.
> 
> I just can't. Just thinking about it puts me off. It's been like that almost from day one (which is 10 years now), so you can imagine our frustration. We probably "try" it, just to please her, maybe 2 or 3 times a year.
> That is why I find myself in the predicament that I am.




I am dealing with the exact same problem with my wife of 6 years of marriage. Any suggestions?

Thanks,


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## JasonL115 (Apr 27, 2009)

GAsoccerman said:


> Ok guys, I am just curious, as I see some women here have posted that their husbands have lost Sexual interest in them.
> 
> Why is this? I am a very sexual person, couldn't stand the idea of not having sex with my wife for longer then a couple of days.
> 
> ...


Hi. Well in my case it's simply that I tend to get bored easily when it comes to sex with any given partner. Three or four sexual encounters and I'm ready to move on. If I don't then I just lose desire for the person and my body pretty much shuts down sex-wise...no erection no orgasm. So I tried to make sure I hit the road before that started up.

This was fine while I was single but I made the mistake of getting married back in the 90's stupidly thinking I could change. I liked the IDEA of marriage. I'd been dating for 12 years and was ready to settle down and start thinking about having kids.

I did try but I lost interest in my wife sexually even before the wedding. Anyway to make a long story short we did manage with extreme difficulty and some help from a fertility specialist to have two kids and the marriage has been OK. We get along and enjoy being parents. But there has been no sex for 15 years. 

She's not happy about it and to tell the truth either am I. But we both believe kids should have two parents and financially we can give them a better life together than we can apart. We have tried various therapists over the years with no luck.

I thought we were the only ones in this type of situation until I started searching around the internet and found dozens of sexless marriage groups and now realize that we are hardly alone with this. There are thousands if not millions of couples in the same boat.

Some people need sexual variety to become aroused. It is certainly not that rare. Offering sexual variety is what has made porn a multibillion dollar business that mostly caters to married men. 

The need for newness and variety I figure is just a sexual preference like preferring tall women, women with big boobs or wanting to be tied up. The trouble with my particular sexual preference is it doesn't go so well with marriage unless the couple has an open marriage or swings, both of which my wife has refused to consider.

Anyway hope this answers your question.


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

MarkTwain said:


> Could you expand on the above a bit more? I am very interested to know what form the "giving up" has taken, and what effect this has had, both on you and her.


we are room mates raising 3 kids. we really don't physically interact at all, no hugging-hand holding, kissing, sitting together, sleeping together, nothing. doesnt bother me at all, dont think it bothers her either. again, since she cut "it" off a few years back i couldnt care less about any of the above. i am not getting into a situation that puts me on the chase all the time and her in complete control of when or if sex happens.

she has become a pathetic sort also, she is always sick (sinuses) and wont go to the doctor, she doesnt keep herself up well and is a hoarder. sometimes i think she is clinically depressed. but she is also a very defiant person and unwilling to talk about her issues

doing without is not killing me, and i have basically lost desire for her anyway


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

okeydokie said:


> doing without is not killing me, and i have basically lost desire for her anyway


You make it sound like you are proud of it...
Do you do it at all?


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

JasonL115-

I think you have been given the wrong advice. Having read your other posts, If you followed my methods to the letter you would be wanting sex again - with your wife.


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

MarkTwain said:


> You make it sound like you are proud of it...
> Do you do it at all?


not proud of it, just happy its not an issue anymore. i am pleased that i have overcome a major source of irritation in my life.


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## reidqa01 (Apr 26, 2009)

O,

You have fallen into the infamous limbo land of marriage.

That is the most dangerous area, that everybody is friends and happy until the inevitable event occurs.

The end.


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

okeydokie said:


> not proud of it, just happy its not an issue anymore. i am pleased that i have overcome a major source of irritation in my life.


Why am I not buying it?


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## reidqa01 (Apr 26, 2009)

Mark,

Millions of couples same fate.

This is not unusual.


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

reidqa01 said:


> Mark,
> 
> Millions of couples same fate.
> 
> This is not unusual.


You need to read all of okeydokie's past posts to understand my comments.


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## reidqa01 (Apr 26, 2009)

Mark,

I have, nothing more than a person surrendering.

I do feel for him, as now it means nothing yet life remains unchanged.


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## snix11 (Sep 25, 2008)

I'm not buying it either. Denial is a big place tho, and lots of people can get lost there, convincing themselves they are happy or satisfied.


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

well thats fine if you dont buy it, thats your gig. we were home together all day today.....alone without kids. we were civil, discussed several home and kid related issues and solved some of those everyday problems. there was no attempt at intimacy at all.

she doesnt want it and i dont want it, so whats the big deal? it's another way of dealing with it, maybe not the way some of you would like it to be in your homes, and thats ok for you. we have both checked out on the sex and moved on for now.


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

okeydokie-

But only a few months ago, you were complaining that you wanted sex, and were frustrated. Now you appear to have repressed that desire rather than having transcended it.

So what's happening these days? Do you guys have sex at all? Ever?


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

MarkTwain said:


> okeydokie-
> 
> But only a few months ago, you were complaining that you wanted sex, and were frustrated. Now you appear to have repressed that desire rather than having transcended it.
> 
> So what's happening these days? Do you guys have sex at all? Ever?


Mark, been working on this issue for a long time and it isnt getting better. If my wife would help herself, if she cared enough to help the situation some it would motivate me more. I just couldn't keep going down the same path of resentment and hurt feelings anymore. I will confess to being a happier person, but the marriage isn't better. We have been through the discussions and arguments. Remember, no sex was not the only problem from my standpoint, she lets other things go that contribute to this problem greatly (continued sinus illness, hygiene below, hoarding). I do think she has a tremendous hormone imbalance and i have pleaded with her to seek help, but she wont do it. I cant help someone who wont help themself and i am turned off by "pathetic."


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

okeydokie-

I feel for you. What makes you stay in the marriage? Are you ever tempted to leave?


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

MarkTwain said:


> okeydokie-
> 
> I feel for you. What makes you stay in the marriage? Are you ever tempted to leave?


no, i love my kids dearly and jusy cant do that to them right now. thats why i have "come to grips" with it because i do not want to display traits of unhappiness around them. we have alot of diversion to keep us busy (kids sports all the time) so we dont sit around and dwell on it to make it worse.


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

I must say, your case is complicated by the fact that your wife clearly has mental health issues. This is made obvious by her lack of hygiene. A happy woman of her age keeps clean.

Do you guys have sex at all? You used to be once am month if I remember rightly?

Another question... do you fantasize about getting a new woman after the kids have grown up?


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

MarkTwain said:


> Do you guys have sex at all? You used to be once am month if I remember rightly?
> 
> Another question... do you fantasize about getting a new woman after the kids have grown up?



sex basically done, has been over a month

oh hell yes i do


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

Others won't agree with me, but I can never see the point of staying for the kids, unless it's for a short period to see if things improve. The problem with staying for the sake of the kids is that they will be growing up in a miserable house. They can tell.

Have you ever wondered what your wife would do if she thought she might lose you? There are countless threads on here where a woman says she went off sex, and it was only after the hubby moved to the couch or out of the house that she finally addressed it. You are allowing her to make it taboo.


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

MarkTwain said:


> Have you ever wondered what your wife would do if she thought she might lose you? There are countless threads on here where a woman says she went off sex, and it was only after the hubby moved to the couch or out of the house that she finally addressed it. You are allowing her to make it taboo.



interesting question, i am not "with-holding" in an attempt to improve it if thats what your asking. i am not trying to strong arm her into it.

and she is losing me, slowly but surely i care less about the overall situation a little more everyday. the sex was just the first to go.


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

What I am asking is: do you think she is lazy and sloppy because she thinks you will hang around indefinitely? This is human nature for some people. 

I have a phrase for this. You are training her to be lazy. There are no consequences for her bad behaviour. What if you said, I am leaving next week? It would certainly improve your self esteem even if it had no effect on her. Has it ever occurred to you that your passiveness is not sexy?


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

MarkTwain said:


> What I am asking is: do you think she is lazy and sloppy because she thinks you will hang around indefinitely? This is human nature for some people.
> 
> I have a phrase for this. You are training her to be lazy. There are no consequences for her bad behaviour. What if you said, I am leaving next week? It would certainly improve your self esteem even if it had no effect on her. Has it ever occurred to you that your passiveness is not sexy?


thats very interesting :scratchhead:

but you and I agree and i have thought this many times, there are NO CONSEQUENCES for her. she isnt going to get fired, she doesnt support the home and kids financially, so there is no urgency for her to clean things up. 

I wouldn't classify myself as passive, you have to undertsand that this has been a long process. my current passive state is a result of her non responsiveness. 

you are a slick rascal MT, slick :smthumbup:


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

But not slick enough it seems:


okeydokie said:


> but you and I agree and i have thought this many times, there are NO CONSEQUENCES for her. she isnt going to get fired, she doesnt support the home and kids financially, so there is no urgency for her to clean things up.


The consequences I alluded to were you leaving with your cheque book in tow. You are training her to be a slob. Over and over again. You feel powerless. It's a joke. You have all the power. She has only the threat of withholding the children. In any case she probably wants saving from herself. But only when you have reclaimed your full power will you be able to save either one of you.

And you never once answered my question: How would she react if she saw you heading for the door?


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

Mark wants to solve everyone's problems, and he is for the most part very good at getting them in the right direction. I respect his opinions most times. This advice is a bit drastic and i think he is trying to get a rise out of me because i will not cave in and say that i do want sex and i need to be a better husband so my wife reciprocates. i think i am a tough case for him because my wife has issues that transcend sexual malfunction.


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

okeydokie said:


> Mark wants to solve everyone's problems, and he is for the most part very good at getting them in the right direction. I respect his opinions most times. This advice is a bit drastic and i think he is trying to get a rise out of me because i will not cave in and say that i do want sex and i need to be a better husband so my wife reciprocates. i think i am a tough case for him because my wife has issues that transcend sexual malfunction.


You've almost found me out...
Actually, I am trying to get you to be tougher.

And you still have not answered my question  Please, please, put me out of my misery.


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

the heading for the door question.....knowing her i think she would initially say "dont let the door hit ya where the good lord split ya"

she may eventually regret everything but she is very stubborn


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

oh, and tougher is coming in the next few days and it may very well result in a split, i will let you know


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## snix11 (Sep 25, 2008)

Yeesh. Okeydokie, I think you are also being kind of a coward - if you don't want to leave for the sake of the kids, then why not WORK towards something that is healthy?


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

snix11 said:


> Yeesh. Okeydokie, I think you are also being kind of a coward - if you don't want to leave for the sake of the kids, then why not WORK towards something that is healthy?


cause i have to do all the work and it has come to my attention that she isnt worth it

what is it i am being a coward about. been working on this for a long time and it is now coming to a head, thats how these thing progress.


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## snix11 (Sep 25, 2008)

it has come to my attention that she isn't worth it?

what did she say when you told her that?


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## Roberto50 (May 8, 2009)

Some people lose interest in their marriages after a long periods of time but it can be reversed if both parties are willing to work at it and rediscover what attracted them to each other in the beginning.


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## Captiosus (May 25, 2009)

I don't necessarily think there's one answer or even a combination of answers that could actually be adequate for the original question.

When my wife and I first got together we both had a super high libido. Over the years it's waned and we can go months without sex. I worry that bothers her but if it does she's never really complained and we've both openly admitted to each other that sex isn't as "important" as it once was.

Some nights just cuddling up watching TV is perfect. Other nights, cuddling up to watch TV ends up with us meandering to the bedroom tearing each other's clothes off.


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## snix11 (Sep 25, 2008)

Ewwwwwwww. Captiosus... 

I want a regular, healthy, sex life. Not a once in a blue moon sex life. 

If it works for you, great!

I think this is where my hubby is, he says he can have sex 4x a week or NEVER, he doesn't care which. 

Usually we opt for never as I don't like to be the one initiating 100% of the time plus he's all about him when we have sex, which isn't much fun.


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## Captiosus (May 25, 2009)

snix11 said:


> Ewwwwwwww. Captiosus...
> 
> I want a regular, healthy, sex life. Not a once in a blue moon sex life.
> 
> ...


It's not exactly once in a blue moon sex, and 10 years ago, I couldn't have imagined having sex 1 or 2 times a month. Neither could my wife. Hell, 10 years ago, neither of us could have imagined having sex less than 3 times a week. Now, it's no big deal. I'm not sure either of us could handle going back to the way we were when we first got together. Back in the days when a 36 condom box lasted in the house for 2 weeks, _max_.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying my situation is right or wrong. Rather, just trying to illustrate that I don't think there's a singular "answer" to the original question because what drives us all is different.


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