# blame the wine



## ilovechocolate (Jan 16, 2012)

We had a pleasent evening last night, chilling out and drank several glasses of wine apiece - however, still dont know how it happened -we went to bed and ended up re hashing everything . There was no shouting but we ended up going round in circles for nearly 2 hours, my H reakons it s put us back 6 months . He text me this morning and said his head is in bits . Thanks to this place I have worked out a lot of things . . . .It was not my fault........It was about his ego.......And the main one - the reason he was hooked? because she made him feel good in bed......But even knowing all this it s still so hard .
I know where she lives and works . I have her home number and mobile number (she s single) and I so want to pile a sh!tstorm on her door . Has any body else manage to get revenge on the AP and if so did it help at all?


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## Beowulf (Dec 7, 2011)

Revenge doesn't help. It may make you feel good for a few minutes or even an hour but you will pay for it in the long run. Karma will see to her. You take care of yourself.


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

Wow - H is in the wrong here bigtime. Does he actually think you should just hold your tongue and not tell him about how you are feeling , and still feeling due to his cheating?

H really needs to understand that you will be hurting for years to come, and it is very much his job to listen and do so without fighting back or blaming you.

he had a long term affair not you.

the only thing it put back 6 months I suspect is his hope to rugsweep it at so he doesn't have to face the horrible thing he did.


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## Mrs. T (Aug 5, 2011)

Revenge may feel good for a short while but won't really "fix" anything. Yes, she wronged you but your husband is the major wrongdoer. I doubt she forced him. It is your anger with him that you need to deal with and that will take time.


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## Chaparral (Jul 17, 2011)

Has your husband read the wayward spouse instructions?

Go to this link, about 11 posts down from the top.

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/genera...sided-need-perspective-please.html#post534068


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

Living with with revenge is not living.

She slept with a married man, your revenge is the OW sorry @ss life.


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## ilovechocolate (Jan 16, 2012)

"the guy" - I know what you re saying but at the end of the day she did her best to break up my marriage and while I know most of it falls on my H (who is doing a lot of heavy lifting) It feels as if she s got away with it scott free . She s had her fun and now has tripped off leaving me to pick up the pieces and that burns so much!!


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## Mrs. T (Aug 5, 2011)

Since she's single how will you get revenge other than waiting till she has another boyfriend and putting the moves on him. Do you really want to stoop to her level?


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## Beowulf (Dec 7, 2011)

ilovechocolate said:


> "the guy" - I know what you re saying but at the end of the day she did her best to break up my marriage and while I know most of it falls on my H (who is doing a lot of heavy lifting) It feels as if she s got away with it scott free . She s had her fun and now has tripped off leaving me to pick up the pieces and that burns so much!!


Think of what kind of person she is to be able to do what she did. That kind of person is going to suffer consequences without help from you. She did not get off _scott free_. She is a conniving self serving b!tch that will attract nothing but drama and difficulty to her life because she has no self respect. By trying to get revenge you only lower yourself to her level. And why would you want to do that?


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## Mrs. T (Aug 5, 2011)

Beowulf said:


> Think of what kind of person she is to be able to do what she did. That kind of person is going to suffer consequences without help from you. *She did not get off scott free. She is a conniving self serving b!tch that will attract nothing but drama and difficulty to her life* because she has no self respect. By trying to get revenge you only lower yourself to her level. And why would you want to do that?


 Very true! Like I love to say....karma is an ugly bit*h!!


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## ilovechocolate (Jan 16, 2012)

Very true! Like I love to say....karma is an ugly bit*h!!



Lol - Lets hope she visits another ugly bit*h very soon . Thanks for the input


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