# Why is stbx's Lawyer delaying?



## ThinkTooMuch (Aug 6, 2010)

Background - I moved west in Nov 2010 telling wife we need to divorce and I wanted to use mediation as the least expensive and least exhausting approach.

I am very, very happy I left this 20+ year marriage - it had become two people living in the same house with very little contact, my then w spending many hours a day playing computer games and/or responding to zillions of worthless work related emails - her employer's staff is 90% women, many with the female equivalent of testosterone poisoning expressed by "kind" missives wondering why their turf was stepped on.

In late March I receive a legal notice - she filed for divorce. No problem but her atty is asking for way more than our pre-nuptial agreement stated - alimony, lawyer fees, large portions of my assets - we kept separate checking accounts and finances during our marriage because I lost everything in my first divorce.

I contacted an atty in my former state, per her directions I filled out the financial affidavit and got it to stbx's atty in early June. 

It is now late August and we have yet to receive a signed financial affidavit from stbx, the one we received leaves off her defined benefit pension which is worth a great deal - we are both in our 60s, I'm disabled, she is a professional who has worked for the same large organization for 25+ years, and has a job she loves for as long as she wants.

Stbx's lawyer ("a shark") is canceling meetings, claims she wants to settle and then acts as if we are going to court.

My guess is that stbx and her atty want me to get anxious and agree to anything to end the marriage, not knowing I'm in no rush and forgetting I can't be bullied; my lawyer is in complete agreement and seems to be much smarter than the stbx's atty.

Here are the questions - 

1. What is your hypothesis? 

2. Why the delays?

3. Why does stbx's atty keep filing motions?

4. Can I insist we go to court w/o stbx's notarized FA? I'd like to be divorced if only to say so on dating sites.

5. Further thoughts?

Thanks!


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