# Marital failure and BD, PTSD and BPD



## Hardtopgsp (Mar 11, 2018)

I’m a Veteran who is suffering from Bipolar, PTSD and Borderline Personality Disorder in search of positive, critical thinkers. For starters, I will not be open to divorce but if my wife so decides in going that route, then I’ll deal with that in court. Since being diagnosed in the beginning of my marriage, I have knowingly suffered from severe symptoms for the past 4 years. I had a shed of light where I was stable but have went back into a spell of symptoms dating from September of last year until present. I’m highly aware of what’s happening to me but I fade in and out of it. My wife has told me today that she thinks we need a break (meaning she) and I’m just looking for advice before I begin to isolate anymore than I have since September of last year. We have had more bad days than good days in our marriage but have managed to make it work enough to stay together. I use to not be aware of what was happening to me and what I was doing but have so for the past three years. We go on date nights but then don’t really, I’m a stay at home husband going to school, she works, I cook and clean and the days I don’t. We talk about our problems and try to fix them and then we don’t while they get swept under the rug. I was unable to be intimate and an excuse formed why try if it doesn’t work. I’m able to be physically and emotionally intimate but there’s no excuse now to why she doesn’t want to reciprocate and she’s not emotionally intimate. I know her love language is quality time and I exercise it. She knows mine is words of affirmation and physical touch but exercises physical and words of affirmation to the point where I know she loves me but I don’t feel it. I know I’m missing verbiage in this post but are willing to disclose more through conversing. About 3 1/2 hours ago my wife told me she things we need a break/separation and I’ve been sitting in my car, at some park ever since and doing homework until now. I told her that I’m not doing a seperation but have strong desires to not get up in the morning and warm her car for work, cook, clean, grocery shop, provide emotional support for work, laundry and do anything else a stay at home husband would do. I don’t like the idea of that because I’m afraid my heart will hardened and so will my wife’s. She’s extremely headstrong and highly set in her ways. I’m losing daylight now so I will be heading home where the both of us currently reside. Any help/support would be much appreciated. If I do not respond it’s because I’m rarely on my phone or computer while at home. Also, I have checked the phone records in the past when something in this nature has happened before but never found anything. I have not checked recently. There have been indicators this seperation would be thrown out but again it has been on and off since September of last year.


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## Edo Edo (Feb 21, 2017)

Thank you for your service, sir. I'm sorry for the pain you are going through now. Has the VA been of any help with your conditions? Were you and your wife together while you were deployed or did you meet after? You don't seem to think cheating is involved. Did your wife express specific reasons why she wants to separate besides possibly the symptoms you currently display?


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## Ms. GP (Jul 8, 2013)

How long have you guys been married? What reasons did you wife give for wanting to separate? I'm sorry your going through this.


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