# How to Help a Family Member Financially Without Destroying Your Marriage



## Administrator (May 8, 2013)

When it comes to the subjects couples fight about most, money is at the top of the list. In fact, according to a recent survey, money issues are partially responsible for roughly 22% of all divorces which makes it the third leading cause of divorce overall. 

There are many different things related to finances which can put a strain on a relationship, but one of the trickiest situations is when one partner provides financial support for another family member. Keep reading to learn how to help your family financially without destroying your marriage. 

*Ways to Help a Family Member with Money*

If you have a family member in need, there are a variety of different ways you can provide financial support. One option is to simply give them a cash gift. If your family member is having trouble with a single cost, this may be the best option – you could also provide weekly or monthly gifts if they need extra help. If you or your loved one are not comfortable with an outright gift, offering a short-term personal loan is another option to explore. Make sure you write out the terms of the loan including the amount, the interest rate (if any), and the due date for repayment so both of you are on the same page from the very beginning.

When it comes to offering a family member financial support, you don’t always have to give them the money yourself. One thing you might consider is co-signing a loan. If your family member has bad credit or greater financial needs than you can cover, co-signing a loan could help them get the money they need. Just be sure you understand the terms of the loan and make sure you are willing to take over responsibility for it if your loved one can’t repay it. Another option is to simply help your family member create a budget and a system for paying bills to help them get back on track with their finances. 

*Tips to Prevent Future Problems*

When you and your partner got married, your two families became one. That means that the problems affecting your spouse’s family become your problem as well. Unfortunately, when one partner starts using your joint resources to support his or her family, it can create tension in the relationship. The best way to prevent something like this from destroying your marriage is to have an open and honest conversation about it. Here are some points to discuss:

•	How much money does the family member need and is that need legitimate?
•	Is it going to be a one-time payment or a recurring thing? 
•	Will the money come from your joint resources or from one partner’s account? 
•	Is it going to be a gift or will the family member pay the amount back? 
•	If you are giving a loan, are you going to charge interest and when is payment due?

Answering these and other questions together will help to ensure that both of you are on the same page about things. You should iron out things like the amount of financial aid and whether it is a gift or a loan at the very beginning. You also need to decide whether it is something you two will do together or if it will be one partner’s responsibility. The more you talk about it upfront, the less likely it will be to cause an issue.

VS Glen, Community Support


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