# Do I love her or is just my conscious? Please, Please Help



## Martin-Telo (Mar 31, 2013)

Hi, everyone. I am 35 and married 3 years ago, with no children. My wife is a Pharmacist. Prior to marriage we were together for 8 years. Well, after marriage everything changed dramatically. The first days she was always crying and whenever i return home she would hug me firmly. Later she was almost sleeping for 15-16 hours per day, not going even out of house. She said, she was depressed and taking some drugs, we had no contact with any of our friends or families, and she also has not contacted her parents or mine, after the marriage. The second year was the same, only she was going out sometimes, but recently she is again taking a heavy medication and sleeping. I am the only one working. You see i do all the house work, cleaning, shopping, banking, ironing, and even cooking on weekends. She is awake during the nights and sleeps during the whole day till afternoon. I almost pay her salary every month fer her own expenses and she has nothing to do with the debts, bills, house expenses and .... She says, I and my family have made her sick. I am devastated totally and crying myself everyday. She says she loves me too much and kisses me a lot and would crash, if she get a divorce, and i cant see her like this. we have no sex for the past year since i cant feel anything towards her and she is not interested. You, see i have some very very good memories with her for a decade, and i don't know what happened from the first night of marriage. I feel like killing myself, and haven't gone to my office for a week, since i cant concentrate.
She hugs me as soon as I reach home, but doesn't do anything in the house even a simple cleaning. She says I am too dependent to my parent (don't know why: I have my own house , cars, good job) and she called my sister a ***** and throw her out of house during Christmas. Her mother also only calls my cell phone and asks about her once in a month. 
I am dying really. Don't know what t o do. She is 32 now, doesn't work, study or anything and just says she loves me deeply and has no problem with me, and that she is sick and under drug influence and would recover soon. She hates my parents and hers too much.. I want to tell her my inner feelings but when she cries, it just kills me...
Please Please Please help if you can.


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## SlowlyGettingWiser (Apr 7, 2012)

Get your wife to the doctor THIS WEEK. Her regular doctor for a check-up.

Determine if she is clinically depressed.
Determine if she is chemically dependent.

Once you have an answer to that (at least one of them will be "yes"), then you know where to start. Get her on anti-depressants, or get her into detox.

You can't "fix" this marriage until you're BOTH healthy and able to THINK CLEARLY. THEN you will be ready for some Marriage Counseling as a couple and Individual Counseling for EACH OF YOU. 

You BOTH need professionals to talk to.

Start with step one: an evaluation of wife PHYSICALLY. It will be a step at a time, but you WILL be able to turn things around in your life.

Good luck!


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

It's not unusual at all for pharmacists to develop drug addictions. Sleeping 15-16 hours a day, taking medications? She's even told you she's under "drug influence" and will "recover soon". Sounds like she's got an addiction and she needs help. It's very common for folks in the medical profession. I would think, especially so for pharmacists. Who has better access to drugs?


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## Kermitty (Dec 27, 2012)

Get her a doctor!!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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