# Sex desire in mid 30s



## Johntee (Apr 27, 2017)

Would sex desire in couple be equal in mid 30s. I think women usually have less at this age. Any opinion?


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

Johntee said:


> Would sex desire in couple be equal in mid 30s. I think women usually have less at this age. Any opinion?


You're very much mistaken my friend.


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

Johntee said:


> Would sex desire in couple be equal in mid 30s. I think women usually have less at this age. Any opinion?


It is all relative to the individual as well as quality of life with regards to ongoing personal development. For some desire increases and for other's it plummets.


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## GuyInColorado (Dec 26, 2015)

My girl is 35 and her sex drive is off the charts. I have to put in extra effort to keep up! I've read a woman's sex drive increases in 30's and 40's, and I believe it to be totally true for an unbroken woman.


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## Taxman (Dec 21, 2016)

Whereas it is all relative dependent on the individual, from what I have read, a woman reaches her sexual peak in her 30's (whereas, I have read that men peak in their teens-FML). We are in our 60's, and our drives are still off the charts, we just sound like a bowl of Rice Krispies (snap, crackle & pop)


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## _anonymous_ (Apr 18, 2016)

Results may vary, I suppose. Really depends on the individual. 

My wife is mid-30s and very low drive. She was low drive in her late 20s too.


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## BetrayedDad (Aug 8, 2013)

Johntee said:


> Would sex desire in couple be equal in mid 30s. I think women usually have less at this age. Any opinion?


LMAO! What is you sample size? One LD spouse? A 35 female is at her sexual peak like an 18 yo male my friend.

Her body is screaming at her to reproduce before menopause kicks in. Sounds like your woman has checked out....


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## ChargingCharlie (Nov 14, 2012)

Based on my experience with a woman that age (obviously small sample size), sex drive at that age is damn near off the charts. She was a single mom with three kids, and we were hitting it all the time, and most of it on her initiative.


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## Bananapeel (May 4, 2015)

I guess I'll be the one to say it. If your woman is attracted to you, turned on, and you meet her needs, she'll have a high drive. If you aren't doing those things then don't expect her drive to change just because she has another birthday. You can't pinpoint an approximate age when her drive and your drive will be the same. There are just too many variables and many have nothing to do with her hormones.


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## jb02157 (Apr 16, 2014)

_anonymous_ said:


> Results may vary, I suppose. Really depends on the individual.
> 
> My wife is mid-30s and very low drive. She was low drive in her late 20s too.


same here...ditto for 40's


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## _anonymous_ (Apr 18, 2016)

Bananapeel said:


> I guess I'll be the one to say it. If your woman is attracted to you, turned on, and you meet her needs, she'll have a high drive.


Other things: if she's got a decent self-image, not chronically depressed, not on medications with relevant side effects, no thyroid problems, not overly stressed out from work/life, not in love with a dog.

I don't know if a specific age has so much to do with it. Sure, it's a factor, but not the sole determinant. 

As a man, I had very high sex drive when I was in my 20s. Now in my 30s, I have even more of a sex drive. Fearing my 40's and 50's; by then, I'll likely be able to bend steel with my dominant arm.


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

Myself and my gf are both thirty three.We have sex at least once every day.She had a baby five weeks ago and that slowed us down but not completely,piv is not the only type of sex and we are both very accommodating in that regard.


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

Johntee said:


> Would sex desire in couple be equal in mid 30s. I think women usually have less at this age. Any opinion?



I have heard that women's sex drive gets greater as they get older, and men's gets less, but that is VERY general and we are all different.


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## bojangles (Oct 11, 2016)

STBXW is late 30's and would be up for it everyday, and probably got it 2x a day, alot of days, before I found out about OM. :surprise:


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

My drive is the same as it was when I was 15.

My body is the same as it was when I last looked in the mirror, last looked at the calendar. 

Like a parallel line in our Universe....Time takes [drive and body] further and further apart.


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## TheTruthHurts (Oct 1, 2015)

Could be very low depending on your family situation. If she has young kids and / or work, she could very well be uninterested in sex.

If she's professional and has a high stress job, she could be uninterested.

Sometimes men and women are deep in career and family in their 30's, reducing the focus on sex. Sometimes due to stress, but also many times because the family is fulfilling too and consumes all the time.

100 women will have at least 100 different answers and experiences here.


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## podiumboy (Apr 2, 2017)

My wife is 31 and has a low sex drive. I'm 35, and my sex drive is as strong as it was when I was 15. I attribute my wife's low sex drive to a combination of external factors; young kids, busy life with work and school, I'm kinda fat, we've been having sex for 11 years and she's bored, etc. It was after the birth of our 2nd kid that our sex life started to go downhill, which was July of 2013. I will say that our sex life is better now than it was a year ago, but I still wouldn't say my wife has much of a sex drive... it's mostly duty sex, but she is trying much harder to meet my needs. 

(No, I'm not some prick that makes her do all the house work, take care of the kids, do my laundry, make my dinner, etc, while I sit on my ass and wait for her to have porn star sex with me. I am very committed to doing my fair share of all those things, not just to get laid, but because I'm an adult. It's also my house to clean, and my kids to take care of also.)


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

For my wife it peaked in her 30s and crashed and burned in her 40s


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## Personal (Jan 16, 2014)

TheTruthHurts said:


> Could be very low depending on your family situation. If she has young kids and / or work, she could very well be uninterested in sex.
> 
> If she's professional and has a high stress job, she could be uninterested.
> 
> Sometimes men and women are deep in career and family in their 30's, reducing the focus on sex. Sometimes due to stress, but also many times because the family is fulfilling too and consumes all the time.


On the other hand it could be very high depending upon your family situation. If she has young kids and or work, she could very well be highly desirous of sex.

Likewise if she's professional and has a high stress job, she could be very desirous of sex.

Just as men and women who are deep in career and family in their 30's, sometimes maintain their desire to have sex since it helps to relieve stress and it can be tremendous fun. Yet also many times because the family is fulfilling too and despite consuming plenty of time, does not significantly limit sexual desire or opportunity.



TheTruthHurts said:


> 100 women will have at least 100 different answers and experiences here.


Yes.

My wife had her first child when she was 30 and her second and last child when she was 33, where she collectively took 2 years of maternity leave. Plus through her 30's, she also moved house on three occasions. While in the first three and a half years of her 30's she was raising our kids sometimes alone whenever I was away for weeks through months at a time with the Army. Plus she went through me nearly dying when I was 30 where I had to spend around six months in and out of hospital.

In addition to that she changed employers on three occasions, through successive promotions in order to advance her full-time professional career, and changed roles with one employer three times as well. At one point she had to lodge a formal claim of harassment at work which saw her immediate superior lose their job. She also once had a fall at work which saw her have various bits of metal put into one of her legs, to enable her to walk again.

Yet throughout her 30's as remains the same today from then through to now where she is turning 47 in a few months, she has always wanted and had plenty of sex. Where although I initiate most often, she initiates lots of times as well.

From her mid twenties up to having children, we averaged having sex around 5-7x a week after the first few months.

After having children through to now, we have averaged having sex around 4-6x a week. Although we often go higher than that, at 7-10x a week when we have time on weekends to do it 2-3x a day.

Incidentally through her 40's thus far, she has moved house on four occasions, inclusive of being isolated by floods for two weeks on the edge of the outback and has been made redundant once. While also having worked full-time for three different employers, inclusive of government management positions. Plus she often takes our son to sport or training and picks our daughter up from one of her concert bands etc. Yet there's plenty of sex between my wife and I.


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## TheRealMcCoy (Apr 13, 2017)

GuyInColorado said:


> ...and I believe it to be totally true for an unbroken woman.


And I'm gonna' get Santa to bring me one of those this year to see if it's true. I heard they don't exist in the wild.


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## MrsHolland (Jun 18, 2016)

Sadly I was with a "broken" man in my 30's so it is hard to know how to answer the question. I had 3 youngish kids but still wanted sex often. I totally gave up on sex in my early 40's due to my LD husband of the day.

Then I divorced him and got to have sex again, woohoo. At 50 I am now having sex pretty much daily (exceptional circumstances aside such as the Big Man being away or more than extreme tiredness on his part or mine). We still average 7 or more times per week. Oh and I am post menopausal.


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## Satya (Jun 22, 2012)

I think my drive is on the higher end of the scale. After 30, I was divorcing and discovered that my drive went up significantly. It had been lower because my ex H and I were detaching and the looming D took up too much of my mental energy. From 30 to almost 33, I was single. I call them my Vulcan years, because I was busy healing and suppressing (controlling) most of my emotions, but I was very horny underneath. My sex drive was definitely there, but I didn't feel ready to explore relationships... And I wasn't interested in anything short term. 

I dated and my sexual energy was probably radiating by then, but still tried to keep it in check so I could vet my dates more cerebrally. I dated a great man for 8 months, opened the floodgates on him as it were, And over time was saddened to learn he was LD and self conscious, so we broke up.

When I met Constable Odo, I was crawling the walls. It was difficult to stay rational around him, since we were so very compatible, but I tried very hard because I wanted to give us the chance we deserved without jumping the gun. In the end, he had much more restraint than I. When we were ready to have sex, he practically needed a full body cast afterward. 

We've been pretty regular ever since, 3x a week, sometimes 4 or 5 when I'm at peaks in my cycle. I have always hoped to be one of the HD types after menopause, simply because I need sex to feel closely bonded to the Constable. Only time (and hopefully, attitude to a degree) will tell.


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## MrsHolland (Jun 18, 2016)

Satya said:


> .......................................
> 
> We've been pretty regular ever since, 3x a week, sometimes 4 or 5 when I'm at peaks in my cycle. I have always hoped to be one of the HD types after menopause, simply because I need sex to feel closely bonded to the Constable. *Only time (and hopefully, attitude to a degree) will tell*.


IMHO attitude accounts for much of life's good and bad. 

Last year (or was it the year before?) MrH had a bout of ED and when I say bout I mean it happened once, took us both by surprise. Off to the Dr with him and had his T tested, turns out his levels are not overly high. Now for a man that at 56 can still easily have sex twice a day you would think that lower T levels would be an issue. His Dr confirmed much of what we had read on the topic, good diet, grass fed beef, changing his exercise to high intensity interval would all help. 
Most of all his Dr said that sex drive is about attitude and that your brain and thoughts are more important that having higher T levels.

It happened once, we were pro active and who knows if/when it will happen again but he loves me deeply and enjoys sex too much to sit around and do nothing about it. Mind over matter.

For me it is absolutely mind over matter winning out v's hormonal changes. I am fitter than I have ever been, I actually follow a diet that is high in the top 10 libido boosting foods. I want to have sex with him every day bc he is so damn gorgeous and sexy and bottom line I enjoy sex.

Good attitude is the most important part of the picture, you have it in spades so I am going to put money on you keeping your drive through and post menopause.


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## Satya (Jun 22, 2012)

MrsHolland said:


> IMHO attitude accounts for much of life's good and bad.
> 
> Last year (or was it the year before?) MrH had a bout of ED and when I say bout I mean it happened once, took us both by surprise. Off to the Dr with him and had his T tested, turns out his levels are not overly high. Now for a man that at 56 can still easily have sex twice a day you would think that lower T levels would be an issue. His Dr confirmed much of what we had read on the topic, good diet, grass fed beef, changing his exercise to high intensity interval would all help.
> Most of all his Dr said that sex drive is about attitude and that your brain and thoughts are more important that having higher T levels.
> ...


Thanks, @MrsHolland, I hope you are correct about the mind over matter. I like to think that is the case as well.


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## TheTruthHurts (Oct 1, 2015)

Ebbs and flows... we didn't have kids till late 30's after 16 years together (dating and marriage). So newness of the relationship can make a difference. I travelled for several years in my 30's so (fortunately) neither of us were having sex (with someone else) during the week. But we hopped into bed immediately when I got home thurs or fri and spent a good deal of time together when I was home. It was win-win - both successful and making $$$ for our eventual family, and really eager to be with each other when we could. Made it more like dating.

Now in my mid-50's it's daily but I insisted on that after coming to TAM and we're both much closer again.

ebbs and flows in a LTR my friend 


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## TheTruthHurts (Oct 1, 2015)

Btw even periods where sex was less frequent - neither was dissatisfied - more like pursuing other priorities mutually 


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## ChargingCharlie (Nov 14, 2012)

Friend of ours has had some major stressors in life - professional, medical, personal. Some bad stuff (like her name being dragged through the press for alleged job malfeasance, major medical problems, some issues with her husband, some issues with her child). Even with all of this, her sex drive is off the charts. She makes her husband wake her up so he can service her each morning before he leaves (he has to be at work earlier than her).


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