# Am I reading too much into this situation?!



## blessed18 (Jun 4, 2018)

Hello Everyone,

So here we go! I work away from home a lot and I have been feeling a sense of restlessness, like something is going on with my SO back home! I try to put it out my head but I have what is called women's intuition and it nags the crap out of me! I have been dealing with my SO's infidelity for most of our relationship but always tried to make it work because we have children! It seems like as soon as I try to put the past behind me, something else comes to the surface and brings back those negative feelings. My SO is in the entertainment field and have artists. A couple of days ago, he informed me of a new artist and gave a males name and spoke about the artist as if they were male! So, a little issue happened when I was on the phone with my SO. He told me to hold on because our DS was calling on the other line. I panicked and thought maybe the kids got hurt. He was on the other line for a little while then finally clicked back over. He was quiet, which caused me to panic even more! I asked if the kids were ok and he said yes, "big relief"! Then I proceeded to ask him what was wrong- by the drastic change in his demeanor. He began to state that his people popped up at the house out of nowhere and they needed help- No phone and no ride..But I was baffled at how they got to our home and asked DS to use his phone to call SO! The people I do know, don't pop up unannounced. So I asked him who was his people and he took a deep sigh and proceeded to tell me that it was one of his female artists and her phone didn't work and she didn't know where else to go! What made me upset is how I just heard about this artist a few days ago...the same artist that was being referenced as a male, so why, supposedly knowing that we are married, felt that it was appropriate to show up unannounced and ask DS to use his phone to call SO?! He got off the phone with me to call someone else and I hung up. About 30 mins later, he texted to state he apologized and that he didn't mean to make me angry. I'm sitting here thinking to myself, if nothing is going on, why would I be angry? He has yet to call me back or respond to the messages I sent. If he feels he made me angry, wouldn't any decent SO try to explain and make the situation better? I don't know if this female is in my house, or anything! I want to get some advice from the people outside looking in. What should I do? Am I overreacting? Please, positive feedback needed! I know it may not be what I want, but going over the top bashing people won't help either! Thanks in advance!


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## jlg07 (Feb 24, 2017)

So FIRST you are CLEARLY not past him cheating --- sounds like you rug-swept and let him get away with it.
HOW did this female artist KNOW YOUR ADDRESS? Is this a normal occurrence that he has his clients coming over to the house?
Call your SON right away and find out directly from him what/who/etc.. Will he give you a straight answer or will he try to protect his father? 

YOU need to work on your feelings about his infidelity -- doesn't matter how long ago it was. CLEARLY you don't trust him, and it really doesn't sound like any of that was fully worked through when it happened.


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

He has a history of cheating, and he is lying about who he works with and talks to, and some chick knows your address and feels comfortable enough to show up unannounced for problems.

Yeah, big problems here. Entertainment industry... that would be a huge no go for me for a known cheater.

How many times has he cheated that you are aware of, and over how many years?


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## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

@blessed18. How old are your children. You can ask them all about it when you get home. Do not confront your H on the phone now. Wait till you get home and you are eyeball to eyeball with him. If he is acting shady call him out. Then buy a VAR and put it in the office or bedroom or wherever he takes his calls.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

He is lying. So you need to test his lies. A polygraph would help.

But keep it simple:-

1) Have you ever cheated on @blessed18 in the past?
2) Are you cheating on her now?

should work well.


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