# Yeah me too!



## naterrell21 (Dec 10, 2021)

Hello everyone, I'm new to being cheated on so I thought I'd seek the help of others to try and make sense of it all. I've been with my gf for over 2 years now and recently found out that over a 3 month period (Jan-Mar 2021) while I was away, my gf slept with at least 6 different men, all of them past lovers, bf's etc, some in our apartment some in hotels others at their places and I am at a complete loss as what to do or can I do? She also informed me of another time about 6 months into our relationship where she had slept with an ex I suppose for drugs as he is a drug dealer user. I learned all of this after I confronted her with some information I was told, as well as a mountain of evidence I was able to collect. We have spoken about this and at first she denied everything even going so far as to say if I didnt believe her to f*** *** and get out! She has since admitted to me the 6 guys but I suspect more which she is not being honest about. I love my gf to no end and had hoped to spend the rest of my life with her but now I feel like I dont even know her anymore. Sadly of course I just wanted to know what is wrong with me what did I do wrong? What? Who? Why? Oh man when does it stop? Anyways my friends that's my story in a brief, there's much more to it of course as each guy brings his own set of drug addict, drug dealing ways to the table and some even beat the crap out of her one breaking her jaw among other things while she was in a relationship with them. Just my luck eh? I hope to hear from you(s) with some sound advice because Im in over my head. Please if you have any questions ask away, I will answer them all. Something I say may help you understand something I don't to which you can let me in on. I can not express to you how grateful I will be to anyone who offers their time to help me and I thank you in advance from the bottom of my broken heart. Thanks everyone for having me. Noel


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## Dictum Veritas (Oct 22, 2020)

There is nothing wrong with you save for even contemplating staying with someone who so clearly belongs to every man. No kids, not married. Have some self-respect and put her in your rear-view mirror, then never, ever look back.

Ghosting her is a no brainer and your only viable option to a brighter and better future. She's a serial cheater. They never stop. They don't have it in them to be faithful.


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## Talker67 (Apr 7, 2016)

lets say you did stay with her....
what would your coming life be...after she did another 12 or so guys this coming year?
How would you like having to use a condom with her, and no oral sex, and even being concerned about kissing her, for fear of catching some uncurable sexually transmitted disease?

face it, she is not a keeper.

I guess the only question....was your relationship with her clearly understood to be a monogamous one, and she cheated on you? Or was your relationship more casual, and monogamy was not expected?


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## Chillidog (Nov 5, 2020)

Not fixable, move on


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## jonty30 (Oct 23, 2021)

naterrell21 said:


> Hello everyone, I'm new to being cheated on so I thought I'd seek the help of others to try and make sense of it all. I've been with my gf for over 2 years now and recently found out that over a 3 month period (Jan-Mar 2021) while I was away, my gf slept with at least 6 different men, all of them past lovers, bf's etc, some in our apartment some in hotels others at their places and I am at a complete loss as what to do or can I do? She also informed me of another time about 6 months into our relationship where she had slept with an ex I suppose for drugs as he is a drug dealer user. I learned all of this after I confronted her with some information I was told, as well as a mountain of evidence I was able to collect. We have spoken about this and at first she denied everything even going so far as to say if I didnt believe her to f*** *** and get out! She has since admitted to me the 6 guys but I suspect more which she is not being honest about. I love my gf to no end and had hoped to spend the rest of my life with her but now I feel like I dont even know her anymore. Sadly of course I just wanted to know what is wrong with me what did I do wrong? What? Who? Why? Oh man when does it stop? Anyways my friends that's my story in a brief, there's much more to it of course as each guy brings his own set of drug addict, drug dealing ways to the table and some even beat the crap out of her one breaking her jaw among other things while she was in a relationship with them. Just my luck eh? I hope to hear from you(s) with some sound advice because Im in over my head. Please if you have any questions ask away, I will answer them all. Something I say may help you understand something I don't to which you can let me in on. I can not express to you how grateful I will be to anyone who offers their time to help me and I thank you in advance from the bottom of my broken heart. Thanks everyone for having me. Noel


If you could have rescued her, you would have by now.
You either lack the skills or she doesn't want to be rescued from her situation.
She has relied upon guys like you to cushion the consequences and it has only caused her to fall farther than she might have, if the consequences had hit her hard in the beginning.
Either way, you're really in the way of her eventually seeking help for herself because you're preventing the full weight of the consequences to fall upon her and cause her to seek help from qualified professionals.
If you and her have this dynamic long enough, it could result in her death.


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## ShatteredKat (Mar 23, 2016)

Why do you have two threads on this subject?


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## GaLaxya (Sep 26, 2021)

Wow. The solution is you leaving. Nothing else.
Your issue isn't infidelity. She isn't capable of having a functioning relationship.

It all makes sense, but you might be too young to know why. 
It might take you ages to fully understand, but be assured it does and there is nothing you can do.

She is most likely the victim of sexual abuse when she was younger. Ask her, if she hasn't told you, if you want. I am pretty sure what the answer will be.
Maybe it was someone close to her.
She definetly hasn't had a healthy environment to grow up in and has serious boundary issues.

Therefore, to her abuse equals love. She will always return or seek people that abuse her. 

If she was a victim of rape in early years, her brain is wired to abuse her own body in order to get attention, drugs or money from men or women, depends on who abused her. For her she thinks she is in control, if she offers men her body.

But later she feels sick about herself and has to drug herself to not being confronted with the pain she is causing to herself.
She either is already or is going to be a junkie and/or prostitute. At least this is how it sounds like from what I read between the lines. 

For a women (or any one that gets penetrated in any way) being sexual with a men means being volnurable and giving up control. And healthy people only do this when they trust the other person.

A person that beats you up isn't some one you would trust as a healthy person. Don't you agree?
So, do you understand why she isn't healthy?

And you also don't trust so many person at once to allow them to 'invade' your body.

This is why womens sexuality differes from men.
Maybe it helps you to understand why a women that sleeps with so many guys in such a short time is far from healthy. 

And no healthy guy would pick such a women. That is why she ends up with guys who are demaged and therefore abusive. 

But the issue isn't her. It is you, because you want to be with this person.

What is wrong with you is the question. 

Don't say you love her. You don't know her. Not after 2 years. You just learned that she isn't who you thought she is.
She will never be that person. Accept it and move on. 
And no, you can't fix her. Such demage comes from abuse and neclect over several years. That can't be reversed by you. Even with therapy it is unlikely she will change completly.

Ask yourself what attracts you to such a broken and distructive person and you'll find a solution and next time a better partner.

I wonder where you did find her... she sounds like a women from the street . Wouldn't be an issuenif she was faithful. Bur she isn't. That is really sad and I hope you find some one better. You sound like a nice guy.

So, you have to change not her. Good luck!


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## jparistotle (Jul 10, 2018)

naterrell21 said:


> Hello everyone, I'm new to being cheated on so I thought I'd seek the help of others to try and make sense of it all. I've been with my gf for over 2 years now and recently found out that over a 3 month period (Jan-Mar 2021) while I was away, my gf slept with at least 6 different men, all of them past lovers, bf's etc, some in our apartment some in hotels others at their places and I am at a complete loss as what to do or can I do? She also informed me of another time about 6 months into our relationship where she had slept with an ex I suppose for drugs as he is a drug dealer user. I learned all of this after I confronted her with some information I was told, as well as a mountain of evidence I was able to collect. We have spoken about this and at first she denied everything even going so far as to say if I didnt believe her to f*** *** and get out! She has since admitted to me the 6 guys but I suspect more which she is not being honest about. I love my gf to no end and had hoped to spend the rest of my life with her but now I feel like I dont even know her anymore. Sadly of course I just wanted to know what is wrong with me what did I do wrong? What? Who? Why? Oh man when does it stop? Anyways my friends that's my story in a brief, there's much more to it of course as each guy brings his own set of drug addict, drug dealing ways to the table and some even beat the crap out of her one breaking her jaw among other things while she was in a relationship with them. Just my luck eh? I hope to hear from you(s) with some sound advice because Im in over my head. Please if you have any questions ask away, I will answer them all. Something I say may help you understand something I don't to which you can let me in on. I can not express to you how grateful I will be to anyone who offers their time to help me and I thank you in advance from the bottom of my broken heart. Thanks everyone for having me. Noel


You already know what to do. You cannot fix her she is broken and badly. She can only fix herself. Move on and grow from this. That is what life is.


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

naterrell21 said:


> Hello everyone, I'm new to being cheated on so I thought I'd seek the help of others to try and make sense of it all. I've been with my gf for over 2 years now and recently found out that over a 3 month period (Jan-Mar 2021) while I was away, my gf slept with at least 6 different men, all of them past lovers, bf's etc, some in our apartment some in hotels others at their places and I am at a complete loss as what to do or can I do? She also informed me of another time about 6 months into our relationship where she had slept with an ex I suppose for drugs as he is a drug dealer user. I learned all of this after I confronted her with some information I was told, as well as a mountain of evidence I was able to collect. We have spoken about this and at first she denied everything even going so far as to say if I didnt believe her to f*** *** and get out! She has since admitted to me the 6 guys but I suspect more which she is not being honest about. I love my gf to no end and had hoped to spend the rest of my life with her but now I feel like I dont even know her anymore. Sadly of course I just wanted to know what is wrong with me what did I do wrong? What? Who? Why? Oh man when does it stop? Anyways my friends that's my story in a brief, there's much more to it of course as each guy brings his own set of drug addict, drug dealing ways to the table and some even beat the crap out of her one breaking her jaw among other things while she was in a relationship with them. Just my luck eh? I hope to hear from you(s) with some sound advice because Im in over my head. Please if you have any questions ask away, I will answer them all. Something I say may help you understand something I don't to which you can let me in on. I can not express to you how grateful I will be to anyone who offers their time to help me and I thank you in advance from the bottom of my broken heart. Thanks everyone for having me. Noel


Girlfriend?

This is easy.

Dump her.


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

I am really surprised that you even have to ask what you should do. 
After only 2 years she has already cheated at least 7 times. 
It's highly unlikely she will ever be a faithful partner. So either you end it or you accept that this is how it's going to be for good. If you ever have children they too will be bought into this mess. 

There are lots of good women out there who will be a good wife and good role model for any children you may have. She isn't it.


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## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

Serial cheater? No.


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## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

naterrell21 said:


> I just wanted to know what is wrong with me what did I do wrong? What? Who? Why?


What you need to know is that it doesn't matter the who, why, when, how many times, etc., etc., what it matters is that she did, period, not anything that you might have done. What it matters at this moment is why are you asking what to do when it should be obvious to you or anyone with a pinch of self respect and dignity that the answer as painful as it may be is to DTMFA. She should not even be in your rearview mirror anymore.


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## skerzoid (Feb 7, 2017)

"I love my gf to no end....." 

Uh, what is it you love about her; that she is a nympho or that she is a drug addict? Rare qualities.


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## skerzoid (Feb 7, 2017)

ShatteredKat said:


> Why do you have two threads on this subject?


New members tell their story and are then encouraged to tell it in the appropriate forum.


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## pastasauce79 (Mar 21, 2018)

There's nothing wrong with you. You deserve better. Move on.


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## SRCSRC (Nov 28, 2020)

You are not married and your relationship is short in the scheme of things. She is a total trainwreck. If you value yourself, get the heck away from her ASAP. You will totally screw up your life if you stay with her. Direct her to seek help and tip-off her family that she is a mess and needs their help but YOU are not staying around. You did all that you can, now take care of yourself and go no contact with her forever.


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## Tdbo (Sep 8, 2019)

Get out NOW, while you are still relatively unencumbered
Return her to her natural habitat, the streets.


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## CrAzYdOgLaDy (Mar 22, 2021)

The only thing you will gain from this relationship is a lot of stds. You need to respect yourself more and walk away from this mess. 6 plus men while with you. It's probably more like double digits, 10, 20, 30 plus. I'd get myself checked for stds if I were you and block her from everything. Your decision though, how much are you willing to put up with?


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

Hey, she's just your girlfriend. There really is no decision or course of action needed here other than to realize she's not your exclusive girlfriend, and since it sounds like that is a (rightly so) big issue for you, time to move on. You are not going to be okay just dating her knowing she's going to see other guys. 

Just out of curiosity, did you have a talk where one or the other of you asked to be exclusive and the other agreed? If not, you had no commitment to begin with. Obviously, she is still shopping around, so you're not the one -- and she's obviously not the one for you. But I only ask the commitment question because some people assume if you're dating, it's exclusive, but that's no necessarily the case at all.


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## Galabar01 (Mar 20, 2019)

You need to get away from this person.


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## sideways (Apr 12, 2016)

She cheated with not one, not two, not three but SIX guys and you're "at a complete loss on what to do"???? Come on......REALLY???

I know it hurts but you're not even married to her so you KNOW what to do. Thank God you found out before you married her, had kids with her, and many more years invested in this woman. 

If you're really at a loss on what to do I'd be more concerned with you than I'd be with the horrible life you're going to have with this woman if you stay with her.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

@naterrell21 If I were to write your story so far it would be titled _The White Knight and the Junkie. _And that just never ends well in reality. The White Knight gets beaten up and his horse gets shot out from under him.

Be sympathetic to her plight, but from a distance. Donate money to local drug rehabilitation causes if you wish, but please remove her from your life as soon as you can.

Why? Because









By the way, you don't love your girlfriend. You love the person your girlfriend _*could*_ have been had she not totally ****ed her life up with drugs.

If she is prostituting herself for drugs she is putting you at risk of STDs or HIV.

Please move on.


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## ArthurGPym (Jun 28, 2021)

Hos are gonna ho.


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

I'm assuming the OP didn't hear what he wanted to hear and won't be back. 

Assuming it is a true story, the thing that scares me is that we have some how created a world in which someone in this situation claims they don't know what to do and come to the internet asking strangers how to fix a situation like this. 

Trust me, I do not want to go back to some kind of Puritan or Victorian era. But have we really come to a point where supposedly grown men are helpless and clueless on what to do upon finding out the girl they're dating is a literal drug ho??


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

His was an extreme case. Not just cheating once but at least 7 times that he knows of in such a short time. 
My concern is that if he stays the children will be bought into this mess.


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

Diana7 said:


> His was an extreme case. Not just cheating once but at least 7 times that he knows of in such a short time.
> My concern is that if he stays the children will be bought into this mess.


I really don't even see this as a case of cheating. 

This was a Captain-Save-A-Ho that picked up some meth wh0re in the parking lot of a strip joint and thought that him being nice to her and buying her stuff would transform her into a legitimate GF. 

Now that he is realizing his simping is not transforming her from a drug ho to legitimate GF, he's lost and confused and doesn't know what to do and doesn't know how to transform her. 

That's what scares me. It scares me that we have somehow created a society where young men think like this.


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

naterrell21 said:


> #1: I love my gf to no end and had hoped to spend the rest of my life with her but now I feel like I dont even know her anymore.
> 
> #2: Sadly of course I just wanted to know what is wrong with me what did I do wrong?


Let me correct #1 a little bit. Now you DO know her and have to face the reality of who and what she is. 

#2 - what is wrong with you is that you have such poor self esteem and have so few options that you felt you could only pick up the rotten fruit laying on the ground. 

What you did wrong was picking up that rotten fruit off the ground and invested your time, energy and money trying to turn it into a tasty fruit pie.


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