# Should I insist that my husband wear a wedding ring?



## tnt20years (Aug 11, 2008)

My husband and I have been married 20 years now. His previous occupation prevented him from wearing a wedding ring due to the danger of a severe injury. He hasn't worked in that profession for about five years now. We have been having problems with him flirting with other women and vice versa recently and I have been considering asking him to wear a wedding ring. What does everyone else think about this?


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## draconis (Oct 3, 2007)

A wedding ring will neither stop him from flirting or being flirted with.

draconis


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## TheLuckiest08 (Jun 2, 2008)

I agree with the above poster. However, I think he should be wearing one. What's his reason to not wear it?


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## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

I dont think you should insist on him wearing a ring if its a means to try and control his behavior. Like drac said, the ring isnt going to change his behavior and he'll just see it as a control tactic, which will only exacerbate his behavior.


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## draconis (Oct 3, 2007)

A wedding ring like all jewery is a matter of comfort. After years of jobs where rings could have cost me a hand or worse I stopped wearing them all together. Now I just don't like any jewery as a matter of choice.

draconis


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## voivod (Aug 7, 2008)

a wedding ring might be a nice little reminder to the potentially wayward, and a sign to "back off" to the approacher. i used to be bothered by my first wife not wearing a wedding ring from time to time. then i lost mine at work and i felt riiculous.

bottom line i think the ring signifies honor toward the divinely ordained union.


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## justean (May 28, 2008)

when my hubby had the one night stand in april and i did my detective work.
i spoke to the barmaid of the pub he went to and she remembers him actually taking his wedding ring of and claiming he was single.


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## tnt20years (Aug 11, 2008)

OK, so I don't insist, but I buy it for him in honor of 20 years??? What do you all think? Then if he refuses to wear it, I get hurt, right???


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## draconis (Oct 3, 2007)

I think the first step is to set up communications where as you let him know how important it is to you and why, and ask him to commit to wearing it before you buy it. Otherwise you become a self defeating prophesy.

draconis


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

tnt-
You are like a cat on a hot tin roof. Your mind is always racing to think up the next scenario where you can gain control of your husband. This is totally understandable, but it won't work!

You are already doing better with him than you have done for a long time. Why not pat yourself on the back and take a breather?

Meddling can only make things worse. As Draconis says, you will be just setting yourself up for defeat. Reading your sentance:


> then if he refuses to wear it, I get hurt, right???


it would appear that you have already written the script... Why would you want to act in this play?


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## voivod (Aug 7, 2008)

i do this very thing in so many situations. it's called (not clinically) stinkin' thinkin'. i was a top salesman in my region and i carried the "stinkin' thinkin' gene. it's a wonder i didn't/haven't ended up on the funny farm. alcohol helped (?) mask the pain resulting from stinkin' thinkin'. now i'm 100 days sober and trying to put togetherand heal my marriage to the most wonderful girl in the world, truly my guardian angel. this is how we get in these situations, methinks.


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## Chopblock (Mar 21, 2008)

I'm late to this, but remember the seinfeld where George wore a ring to improve his effectiveness at flirting?

I think it would be a nice gesture to buy him an anniversary ring, but understand that after decades of not wearing one, he is unlikely to change now.

But may I suggest something else, like a 20 year rolex with an engraving on it?


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## cheewagacheewaga (Aug 28, 2008)

Nobody should be forced to do anything. Ideally he should want to wear his ring because he wants to, not because you're nagging it about him.


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## tnt20years (Aug 11, 2008)

OK, thank you guys very much for your advice....I will take it all into consideration!! 

MT: I'm sorry I seem like a space cadet....it's just that my head is whirling since everything happened and I'm a mess...inwardly...trying to keep it under control outwardly...I swear!! I haven't spoken to my husband about anything since I promised I wouldn't, OK???


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

tnt20years said:


> I haven't spoken to my husband about anything since I promised I wouldn't, OK???


Well done! 

You deserve a saucer of milk


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## rag doll (Jan 4, 2009)

I think he should and so should you. The ring is a symbol of love and the words THIS ONE IS TAKEN!


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## kirkster5 (Sep 23, 2008)

:iagree:

I think wearing your wedding ring is a sign of devotion and respect. It says to the world and to your spouse that "I'm married and proud of it". I think that is well worth the minor physical discomfort some feel wearing it. JMHO


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## sarah.rslp (Jan 2, 2009)

I'm agreeing with everybody else. Incidently you can wear a wedding ring when working with machinery you just need to put electrical tape around it.


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## GPR (Jan 3, 2009)

sarah.rslp said:


> I'm agreeing with everybody else. Incidently you can wear a wedding ring when working with machinery you just need to put electrical tape around it.


Doesn't always work.

Guy I know at an area factory lost a finger doing this exact thing.

The company's POLICY is NO WEDDING RINGS. No questions asked. Leave in your pocket, or in the locker. No rings, watches, etc. etc. etc.


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## Bloodymary (Oct 10, 2010)

OMG...there are some people who see the wedding ring...or the white ring where it use to be and stay AWAY...there are however some TRAMPS that don't care if the man they are trying to get to take them home that night is married and has 20 kids or not. And if he don't care he will flirt and cheat with it on. But why wear yours...unless you just want to? Shoe on the other foot....let's see how he likes it!!!


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## MsLonely (Sep 23, 2010)

My husband always wears the wedding ring, but I only put it on when going out with him. I don't like to wear rings for 24 hours. 
Since my husband also like to wears his watch and ring in his sleep. It would be very weird for me to see his hand without the ring one day...
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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