# First meeting since separated



## Ppaxton (May 16, 2011)

My wife and I have been separated for a month now. She left due to me being controlling and manipulative and jealous. We met for the first time 2 days ago, i was finally starting to plane out. When we met she said she watched our wedding video, and it turns out i broke every one of my wedding vows. She went through them one by one. She has kept every single one of hers. She asked me if i wanted to be married, i said yes. She said there were times when she wished I had told her how it was going to be from the beginning because she would have never married me. She told me that the only reason she is still here is because she made a commitment. But she said it doesn't appear to her that i am committed. She told me the entire year she has been married to me she has been in Hell. She told me during this whole process i never appreciated the pain she was in. I was only concerned with my own pain. 

Should i let her go? I don't want to hurt her anymore. Maybe it would be best if i just Let her go. Even though i love her.


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## anx (Nov 30, 2010)

I would suggest committing and working through it.


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## Dedicated2Her (Nov 13, 2010)

This is a cycle. She does things to contribute to it as do you. Until she comes to a place of humility, you will never do enough to please her. Get into marriage counseling so you both can deal with your issues and stop the cycle. Her doing that to you was BS and blameshifting. Wedding issues are 50/50. Commit and go to MC.

Oh yeah, pick up "Fathered by God" by John Eldredge. Live in this book for a while. It will help you start your change.


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## socal04 (Apr 28, 2011)

Hang in there.. she still wants you.. deep down


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