# Discipline,when?



## Nameo (Jul 11, 2011)

I have a one year old daughter,and I'm wondering when will the right be to start disciplining her. I'm quite new to fatherhood,so I don't know much and would appreciate some advice.

My daughter has already started misbehaving a little bit,so I'm not sure what to do.
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## Syrum (Feb 22, 2011)

Her misbehaving is just natural curiosity and she has no way of telling the difference between right and wrong. She's just exploring.

I would say gently guide her, and redirect her behaviour when necessary. I don't think discipline is needed at that age.Young children do however learn to develop empathy at a very young age, and this will be the best way to ensure she grows into a caring young person who does the right thing for the right reason. Help her develop empathy for others. If she hurts someone, let her see you give the other person sympathy, and say that's not nice you wouldn't like it they did that to you etc...


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## Nameo (Jul 11, 2011)

Thank you very much for the advice.
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## Nameo (Jul 11, 2011)

Any recommended good books I can read?
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## Mom6547 (Jul 13, 2010)

Nameo said:


> Any recommended good books I can read?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Ha!
http://talkaboutmarriage.com/family...nts-figure-whats-wrong-our-child-first-2.html

At 1 you begin the context of discipline. Discipline is not a dirty word that means punish. It is a word that means teach. Teaching at this age is often about redirection. 


The above books are discipline general. Touchpoints series is good for understanding developmental readiness for various ages.

Good luck! You are a concerned parent wanting to learn. You will do fine, fine.


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## meson (May 19, 2011)

Syrum said:


> Her misbehaving is just natural curiosity and she has no way of telling the difference between right and wrong. She's just exploring.
> 
> I would say gently guide her, and redirect her behaviour when necessary. I don't think discipline is needed at that age.Young children do however learn to develop empathy at a very young age, and this will be the best way to ensure she grows into a caring young person who does the right thing for the right reason. Help her develop empathy for others. If she hurts someone, let her see you give the other person sympathy, and say that's not nice you wouldn't like it they did that to you etc...


To me this is discipline. Redirecting behavior is a method of enforcing discipline. It is teaching her the rules by which she should live. Don't focus on the bad behavior too much. Focus on her good behavior. Reward and engage her when she is behaving properly. Allowing her to explore is essential but redirect or use timeout for bad behavior. If you provide too much attention to the bad behavior, she may decide she likes that attention and then it becomes a reward which reinforces bad behavior.


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Sit down and watch about 50 episodes of SuperNanny. You'll be a natural in no time!

I would add that it's never to early to start explaining WHY you are using discipline, even if it's just time out. Show them the logic of why it has to be done, so that they can start reasoning it out on their own first.

I raised my DD20 that way. Any time we had to take a corrective action, I explained why, and suggested other ways that she could have chosen, that wouldn't have resulted in getting punished. To get her wheels spinning in her head.

A couple years ago, her dad asked her why she was never getting grounded all the time like most of her friends. She just shrugged and said 'why would I do something that I know is going to get me in trouble?'


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## Mom6547 (Jul 13, 2010)

turnera said:


> Sit down and watch about 50 episodes of SuperNanny. You'll be a natural in no time!
> 
> I would add that it's never to early to start explaining WHY you are using discipline, even if it's just time out. Show them the logic of why it has to be done, so that they can start reasoning it out on their own first.
> 
> I raised my DD20 that way. Any time we had to take a corrective action, I explained why, and suggested other ways that she could have chosen, that wouldn't have resulted in getting punished. To get her wheels spinning in her head.


To take this excellent advice one step further, better than explaining is scaffolding / coaching and role playing so that THEY come up with alternate solutions themselves.


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## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

Mom6547 said:


> To take this excellent advice one step further, better than explaining is scaffolding / coaching and role playing so that THEY come up with alternate solutions themselves.


Indeed.

If it's THEIR idea, they'll actually believe it.


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