# And so it ends.....



## losinghope12 (Jan 31, 2012)

My first marriage, has imploded after a mere 8 months. I met with an attorney today and within a week or so we will be filing paperwork to begin the divorce proceedings, which should take no more than 8 weeks. I am ashamed, humiliated, and a tad bit angry to say the least that my marriage ended as quickly as it did. I will have plenty of time self-reflecting on what I could've done differently but as goes here is my marriage in a nutshell

Wife did not/does not work. I work 45-50 hours a week and make almost six figures 

Wife does not do any form of housework. Sits on the computer and plays WoW all day. On Saturday mornings, I do laundry, dust, vaccum, clean bathrooms, do yardwork. During the week after I get home, I do dishes, clean up after the pets, feed pets, etc

Wife does not cook dinner but maybe once a month she will make spaghetti. I am left with "living off the land" by eating snack food or frozen meals all of the time

Wife has committed no fewer than two EAs with guys she has met on the Internet playing WoW. Graphic text messages sent to each of them, begging for sex, etc. I have never once so much as flirted with another woman

Wife has gained about 60 lbs over the past year and now is about 5'2 and 225lbs. I go to the gym during my lunchbreak at work almost every day

Oh well it is what it is I suppose. I dont think I am an awful person, this just wasn't a good fit. Unfortunately with my self esteem as low as it is right now, I am going to cling to the fact that I am in fact an awful person for the next several months. Oh and my parents just informed me they are moving about 700 miles away for a new job (I am an only child). So within the span of two weeks I lost my wife, my parents and will be pretty much all alone,as I dont have any close family in the area


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

All I can say is that I hope you can use this as a learning experience, so you can pick your next partner better. Identify what warning signs you missed, what your"must haves" are, what you can do different. You might want to start with the "no more Mr. Nice Guy" threads in the men's forum, and see if it relates to you.

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## yellowsubmarine (Feb 3, 2012)

Don't look at it as a failure, but as a "life experience." This may not make you feel better, but you are better off finding this out early on than years down the road. Stay strong.


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## SilverPanther (Feb 2, 2012)

Right there with you losinghope. I am so ashamed of how quickly my marriage fell apart. I know that it's good to look at it as a learning experience, but right now it just feels incredibly distressing that something I planned would be the rest of my life is over so quickly. I'm still in shock, but the shock is wearing off and it HURTS.

I'm sure as time passes it'll get easier for both of us...time does heal everything. And then maybe we can look back at this and recall the mistakes we made, to make better choices in the future. At least, thats what keeps me going.


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## tacoma (May 1, 2011)

You seriously lucked out you`ve only invested a year or so in this before figuring it out.

It sometimes takes decades.


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## 1dayatatime (Feb 19, 2012)

I was in the same situation as you except STBXH in my case. Don't let this bring your self esteem down. your worth more then that. she sounds messed up to begin with. sorry that your going through this with us all. hugs


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