# Cheated on my wife



## sketches (Jul 14, 2013)

I have made the biggest mistake of my life and potentially lost everything.

I have been with my wife nearly 10 years, but we were only married last September. In March I made the mistake of attending a massage parlour which I mistakenly considered to be legit. Towards the end of the massage the woman started massaging my penis and to my eternal shame I didn't stop her. I immediately felt guilty about this but decided not to tell my wife.

Some weeks later I started having weird feelings in my penis and then developed severe pain in my pelvis and whole genital area. I had to come clean to my wife then but as I started to tell her she crumbled in front of me. I couldn't tell the whole truth so lied and said I stopped her, but was still worried I had caught something. I got tested and was cleared for everything bar herpes because I don't have any sores. However, the pain got worse and worryingly my penis began to lose sensation. My doctor said this was very uncommon and was more than likely psychological, it isn't though. I have put my wife through 3 months of hell over my health concerns and our sex life has suffered immeasurably. Yesterday I had to come clean and told her the full story.

Needless to say she is furious with me and wants me out of our flat. She has told her mother who is equally disgusted in me and there is a very real possibility that our marriage is over. My entire family adore her and invested so much into our wedding that they will not be able to forgive me either. 

I am in absolute pieces over this and cannot imagine my life without her. I made a huge, fleeting mistake and it has potentially cost me my life.

I am not looking for sympathy here. I know how much I have messed up and dealt with the situation so badly. 

Any advice would be greatly appreciated though.

Thanks


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Tell her about TAM. She needs support from people who have been where she is. Give her time.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Anuvia (Jul 10, 2013)

I'm sorry you and your wife is going through this.


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## sketches (Jul 14, 2013)

Hi,

Thanks for your advice and support. She introduced me to these kind of websites, so I'm sure she will be seeking help online.

I'm prepared to give her all the time she needs, but I'm so worried it's too late.


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## SaltInWound (Jan 2, 2013)

sketches said:


> My entire family adore her and *invested so much into our wedding* that they will not be able to forgive me either.


So you don't think your questionable character is what could cause your family to not be able to forgive you?


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## Woodchuck (Nov 1, 2012)

Come on guys, someone throw the BULLSH!* card....I didn't know it was a "BAD" place....You can't come clean here, you didn't come clean with your wife....This wasn't his first happy ending.....

the woodchuck


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## Anuvia (Jul 10, 2013)

Woodchuck said:


> Come on guys, someone throw the BULLSH!* card....I didn't know it was a "BAD" place....You can't come clean here, you didn't come clean with your wife....This wasn't his first happy ending.....
> 
> the woodchuck


I was wondering how the OP got there in the first place. If I accidentally ended up in a place like that and got a happy ending I wouldn't tell my wife.


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## sketches (Jul 14, 2013)

I can assure you I had no idea this place offered that kind of "service", and certainly didn't go seeking it out. I work in a very well to do area of London and for the life of me never expected this kind of thing happened there. 

Yes my character has been tarnished and my family are as likely to be disgusted in me as I am and my wife is.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

sketches said:


> I can assure you I had no idea this place offered that kind of "service", and certainly didn't go seeking it out. I work in a very well to do area of London and for the life of me never expected this kind of thing happened there.
> 
> Yes my character has been tarnished and my family are as likely to be disgusted in me as I am and my wife is.


As a matter of interest, where in London was this massage parlour?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Gabriel (May 10, 2011)

Um, no way in hell that someone touching your penis with their hands would give you an STD as you describe. I could see warts or something, but nothing more than that.  

Also, from what I've heard, these types of ladies never just "go for it" like that. They ask first, especially because it requires more $$ from you.

Something doesn't add up.


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## Acabado (May 13, 2012)

Gabriel said:


> Something doesn't add up.


This
Unless you realize you must give up the urge to control the outcome there's no chance in hell you can help your marriage.
It's possible you won't have the chance anyway but without coming clean the chances are zero.

Stop lying.


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## sketches (Jul 14, 2013)

Thanks for your input Gabriel.

I appreciate what you may have heard, but this is what happened to me.

Also herpes can appear on the hand in the form of herpetic whitlows.


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## sketches (Jul 14, 2013)

What do you think I'm lying about?


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

sketches said:


> What do you think I'm lying about?


I think they might be wondering why you didn't realise what kind of a massage parlour you where in.

The girl was stupid. You could have been a police officer working under cover.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## sketches (Jul 14, 2013)

Well believe me I want to get the place shut down!

This place also offers acupuncture and herbal remedy's. There is nothing seedy about it.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

sketches said:


> Well believe me I want to get the place shut down!
> 
> This place also offers acupuncture and herbal remedy's. There is nothing seedy about it.


Where is it in London?

Btw if they offer any sexual services then it might be more than a little seedy.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Headspin (May 13, 2012)

MattMatt said:


> As a matter of interest, where in London was this massage parlour?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Haha....... what are you like !
:lol:


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Headspin said:


> Haha....... what are you like !
> :lol:


If we know the location we are more likely to know if it legit or not.

For no other reason! 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## alte Dame (Aug 7, 2012)

Is your wife reading this thread?


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## AngryandUsed (Jun 23, 2011)

MattMatt said:


> If we know the location we are more likely to know if it legit or not.
> 
> For no other reason!
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I readily believe this Matt!!!!


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## diwali123 (Feb 17, 2012)

Sounds unlikely.


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## doubletrouble (Apr 23, 2013)

I massage my wife. Nobody else massages little dt.... The second a hand went into that general area, I'd've forgotten about the massage and been VERY tense. 

You had several quality moments to reflect what was going on, but you opted out. Time to start doing the heavy lifting to try to save your M, if your W wants to. 

And yes, NOW it's ALL up to her. You showed her she was optional to you; now you're HER option.


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

Gabriel said:


> Um, no way in hell that someone touching your penis with their hands would give you an STD as you describe. I could see warts or something, but nothing more than that.
> 
> Also, from what I've heard, these types of ladies never just "go for it" like that. They ask first, especially because it requires more $$ from you.
> 
> Something doesn't add up.


:iagree:

How do you get an STD from a *HAND JOB?*


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