# Failing marriage with kids



## VeryUnhappy71 (Nov 2, 2013)

I need help. I am extremely miserable with my marriage of 10 years and 2 great kids. I will try to keep this short.

Wife has lost 5 jobs in a matter of a few years. Drinks every night. Sex, none. And on that subject, sex is only when I initiate it. Never touched. Wife does absolutely nothing around the house. And I mean nothing. Cant even put the dishes in the washer. The only thing good here I can say is she does the homework extremely well with the boys. I feel so neglected and unappreciated. 

I am considering divorce, but I do not know if I can do that with my kids.

Am I cheating. No, but someone has caught my eye and that is it. 

Not sure what I am looking for here on this forum, we have mutual friends, so it is very hard for me to talk to them. 

I am a fireman and work 24 hr shifts, and no, she is not cheating. At least not that I know of and if she was Im not sure if I would even know, but my gut says no on wife cheating on me.

Point here is I put 100% into this marriage and have held this family together for over 5 years now and I am at the end of my rope. 

Any suggestions or like story's, actually, anything at all would help me understand what is going on.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

So what have you tried to resolve the issues in your marriage?

C


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## VeryUnhappy71 (Nov 2, 2013)

Thank you for your resonance. I re read my post and it was terrible. To answer your question. We have gone to marriage counseling, twice actually. I have listened to her, supported her through all her problems. I have numerous times told her exactly how I am feeling inside, so communication on my part is there, and works for a few days then back to norm.
Communication communication communication with her without pointing fingers and have tried to express my feelings to her.

Note, this is my second marriage and I have 1 child with my first wife and that divorced really affected his life and I have sworn that I will not do that again to these two beautiful children we have. So I have stayed in this marriage for the kids, like so many do, but it seems to never work in the long run.

I have tried everything that was taught to us with counselors and just seems to end up right back to square one.

B


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## bbrad (May 30, 2012)

You might try a different councilor or two, keep searching till you find the right fit.


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## JustSomeGuyWho (Dec 16, 2012)

VeryUnhappy71 said:


> Thank you for your resonance. I re read my post and it was terrible. To answer your question. We have gone to marriage counseling, twice actually. I have listened to her, supported her through all her problems. I have numerous times told her exactly how I am feeling inside, so communication on my part is there, and works for a few days then back to norm.
> Communication communication communication with her without pointing fingers and have tried to express my feelings to her.
> 
> Note, this is my second marriage and I have 1 child with my first wife and that divorced really affected his life and I have sworn that I will not do that again to these two beautiful children we have. So I have stayed in this marriage for the kids, like so many do, but it seems to never work in the long run.
> ...


Curious but although it's been 10 years, how quickly did you remarry after your divorce?

Sounds like depression to me without much additional information. I'm assuming she hasn't always been like this .... sounds like a recent thing over the last couple of years ....?


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