# Would like to hear your experience with spousal support



## D8zed (Mar 12, 2009)

My 24+ year marriage is badly on the rocks and I am wondering how long I might be expected to pay spousal support if it ended. We have 2 kids and the youngest will be 18 soon. My wife worked full-time until our first child was born. Then she started working part-time about 5 years ago until she got laid off. Today she is going to school for a 2 year degree that will result in her working full-time (in approx 1 to 1.5 years).

Does anyone have any spousal support experience, especially with a long-term marriage? How long did you have to pay it. What percentage of your income was it? Any helpful advice or suggestions?

Thanks.


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## Brewster 59 (Jun 19, 2010)

What I know applys to the State of California and may differ in other states. In California a marraige of less than 10 years qualifys for temporary alimoney 10yrs+ may qualify for lifetime alimoney or until a new marriage occurs for the recieving spouse.

The best advice I can give is to try to work out an agreement that you can both live with and hire a paralegal to do the paperwork, if thats not possible then maybe mediation, or a collaborative divorce. If she laywers up and is trying to get everything she can get then get a good attourney but at least recommed to her to do a search on the cost of an avg divorce and realize this is cash that neither one of you will get.


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## DennisNLA (Jan 26, 2010)

Hi Dazed,

I am not a lawyer, so do not take this as legal advice.


I have done some initial reserch and am in a very similar situation. I have been married for 20.5 years, and my two children are 17 and 14. It will depend on the state you live in. In California, spousal support is calculated for roughtly 1/2 the length of your marriage for marriages of less than 10 years, up to the judge. In calculating spousal support the tables take into account your income versus her income. If she is not working, the judge has digression on imputing what income she should be making depending on her qualifications. The imputed figure may not take effect for a number of months to a few years. For marriages at our lengths, we are most likely looking at spousal support for life or until our spouses remarry. 

Also support if based on an initial figure of x. If you spouses salary starts at y and then goes up, the x figure of support is likely to go down by z percent for every dollar she makes in addition. Spousal support is tax deductible for us generally speaking. Child support is not. Child support is calculated via tables based on the amount of time the children spend with the other parent, the amount of expenses you are paying plus your income. This is generally fixed in nature and does not deviate from charts.

As for your wife not working, you can go to professionals that will asses her job outlook and testify to these facts. The lawyer I saw estimated that this would cost about 3-4K for the investigation + another 1K for each day of testimony. 

I am certainly open to sharing more information as I receive it.


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## D8zed (Mar 12, 2009)

Thanks for the feedback thus far. And yes, please continue to share your information Dennis if you don't mind. Based on the info so far, I can say I'm glad I don't live in CA. ;-)


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## cami (Jun 13, 2010)

I'm in Nebraska and have found out from my lawyer that I can ask for half of the length of marriage as my marriage thus far is 23 years. I can also ask for half of the difference in his income gross vs my income gross.

Please note: I am not a lawyer, this is just what I was told by my lawyer when in his office.


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## D8zed (Mar 12, 2009)

cami said:


> I'm in Nebraska and have found out from my lawyer that I can ask for half of the length of marriage as my marriage thus far is 23 years. I can also ask for half of the difference in his income gross vs my income gross.
> 
> Please note: I am not a lawyer, this is just what I was told by my lawyer when in his office.


cami,

I'm in the midwest as well. So based on what you posted, is this correct:

- He could pay up to 11.5 years of spousal support (assuming you don't remarry of course).

- If he makes $40,000 and you make $20,000, he could be responsible for up to $10,000/yr. (40,000 - 20,000 = 20,000 / 2)

Thank you.


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## cami (Jun 13, 2010)

Yes, lawyer said that is what we can ASK for. He also said that H has the right to object and it will be more likely to get 6 - 7 years. But the amount is what I can ask for. 

Not sure what I want to do yet at this point. 

AND if you file one of those do it yourself things, you are NOT allowed to ask for alimony in my state. AND if you do not ask for alimony at the initial time of divorce, then you CANNOT go back and ask for it later. So, if nothing else, make sure there is a meanial amount put in place so that you can amend that if necessary, but make sure it's there. :scratchhead:

oops, taking this out as I already slipped and said where I was. Bad me!


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

Hi D8zed,

I guess from your post, things have gotten worse for you. I'm sorry. From my perspective things look good on the alimony front according to my attorney. Since this has been a 24 year marriage, my state says alimony will be permanent (unless I remarry). And since I make no income I will probably get 1/2 of the estranged husband's $120K salary. It is no wonder the stbx is always sending me job ads! lol He would like for me to work, so his contribution would be offset. Some of this is apparently up to the judge's discretion--and there are other mitigating issues in my personal case.


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## doc johnson (Mar 4, 2014)

ok I have been married 22 years and almost died 4 years ago I have a lot of medical problem and drw disability my husband makes aboy 42,000 a year how much alimony would I be intiled to


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