# Advice



## DMZ1 (Mar 17, 2013)

My husband is affectionate in private but ignores me in public and I am sick of it. I try and avoid public functions with him because of this but I know that is not the answer. 


He does not introduce me to anyone, is very outgoing and social with others (I am not, I am an introvert but do warm up and talk eventually) and does not include me in his family pictures. It is very hurtful. We have talked and talked about this and he apologizes and says he does not realize he does this but it does not change.


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## imtamnew (May 13, 2013)

Did it ever happen that he introduced you to people and you because of your introvert nature kept sulking about it?


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

DMZ1 said:


> My husband is affectionate in private but ignores me in public and I am sick of it. I try and avoid public functions with him because of this but I know that is not the answer.
> 
> 
> He does not introduce me to anyone, is very outgoing and social with others (I am not, I am an introvert but do warm up and talk eventually) and does not include me in his family pictures. It is very hurtful. We have talked and talked about this and he apologizes and says he does not realize he does this but it does not change.


Introverts and extroverts often attract each other... it's very helpful when both understands each other-even in their differences... if you have made it clear to him this hurts you, you want to be included...(some may not want in many pictures.. I know a # of people like this)...then it's not a case where he isn't understanding you. 

Can you tell us what has changed.. if he was like this while dating... you probably wouldn't have married him...when did his behavior shift like this?


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

You might want to consider going to a marriage counselor with him. This is something that the two of you need to negotiate and then agree upon how you will both handle it.

He probably feels that you should be able to just get out there and meet people and talk to them like he does. So helping you on is a foreign and awkward thing for him.

I also think that you might want to get into counseling yourself to figure out how to behave in a more out going manner. While it makes sense that your husband ought to introduce you to people he knows and include you in some of the conversations he is having, it's also your responsibility to get out there and be social.

For example, if he's talking to people, why don't you just join the conversation? You don't need his introduction, invite or permission to do it. Just join in. You might want to come up with a few intro sentences that get you into the conversation..all on your own. A counselor can help you with it.


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## MrsAldi (Apr 15, 2016)

I agree with EleGirl, it would be really helpful to get counseling for both of you & even for you. 

My husband doesn't like affection in public, at first I was sad & offended, but eventually I became more used to it & now it doesn't even bother me. 
Now he wants to hold my hand & kisses me on the forehead of were out walking & stuff. 

Even though we are married I was not in his brothers family wedding photo, I was happy about that because the picture went all over Facebook anyway. 

Learn to be confident & just be yourself when talking to other folks, you sound like a nice lady so I guarantee people like you. 

Husbands don't realize sometimes that they offend us, so try not to get too upset & know that he's not on purpose trying to cause hurt to you. 

Sent from my B1-730HD using Tapatalk


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## niceguy28 (May 6, 2016)

DMZ1 said:


> My husband is affectionate in private but ignores me in public and I am sick of it. I try and avoid public functions with him because of this but I know that is not the answer.
> 
> 
> He does not introduce me to anyone, is very outgoing and social with others (I am not, I am an introvert but do warm up and talk eventually) and does not include me in his family pictures. It is very hurtful. We have talked and talked about this and he apologizes and says he does not realize he does this but it does not change.


Sometimes actions speak a lot louder than words. It seems like he might be embarrassed by you for some reason. Have you point blank asked him that.


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