# What a mess...



## MarriedVeryConfused (Mar 13, 2015)

My head is in an absolute mess. Without going into tons of detail, we've been together 10 years, married for 7 months - and I haven't been a happy person in myself now for a good 3 - 4 years.

Our relationship has a lot of unresolved issues that bother me massively like the fact she has only initiated sex twice in 10 years, the fact she will not let me meet anyone from work when she's worked there for 6 years, and the fact I just feel she's selfish and doesn't give a damn about my needs. She has promised the sex thing would change (it hasn't), and she says people at work just don't bring other halves along. She says she is an honest person not a liar and not a cheat, but I just don't buy it, something isn't right. 

What do you when you're on such a knife edge that any little argument turns into a blazing row, she runs off crying, old arguments are formed and it's just a complete mess. For my own sanity I don't think i can go on anymore, is there a way back or is it best just to call it quits?


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## ReidWright (May 15, 2014)

MarriedVeryConfused said:


> we've been together 10 years, married for 7 months - and I haven't been a happy person in myself now for a good 3 - 4 years.


yeah, a marriage license doesn't automatically fix a relationship. too late now.



MarriedVeryConfused said:


> She says she is an honest person not a liar and not a cheat, but I just don't buy it, something isn't right.


what red flags are you seeing? late nights out without you? does she guard her cell phone? lots of calls or texts to someone?


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

Even going by what little you posted, I think you should not have married. It's not too late to undo the mistake - so just get a divorce (or an annulment if possible) and move on. It sounds like the two of you really aren't compatible, so stop trying to force it to work.


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## askari (Jun 21, 2012)

I was going to say the same as MbutH above.....I think you've probably realised that marrying was, in hindsight, not the right thing to do.

But its done. Now you need to move forwards.

I'm assuming the marriage has been consumated - in some religions an unconsumated marriage isn't a marriage.

If it was consumated I hope you wore (and continue to wear) one of those rubbery things on your pecker because the LAST thing you want are children.

YOU have to decide what YOU want to do. Do you really want to give it a go? In which case you have to have a very serious talk with her and she also has to be 100% in wanting to make it work.

If you, her or indeed both of you decide to call it a day (and it sounds as if you do) get on with it making it quick.


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

I notice you talk a lot about her work, so let me assume a few things to fill in the gaps.


You do not work
She is a doctor
She cries easily because she under an extreme amount of stress at work saving lives and just expects you to hold it together and be emotionally stable when she comes home from a long day
Even though she does not initiate sex, she expects you to initiate and is sexually receptive to you all the time.


ummmm.... It is not as bad as you think. Hang in there bro!


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