# What can I do?



## lover (Sep 13, 2014)

My wife said she don't like sex at all. When we doing she only waiting that I can do finish soonest even she don't have passion at all..
She only like to hug me, talking with me, lying next to me.. And miss me when I am not here...
What happend with her? Why she don't like to do sex???


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## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

Why do you think she no longer wants to have sex with you?


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

Did she ever like sex with you, or with anyone else?

Is sex painful for her?

Does she orgasm, at all, ever?

Does she masturbate? If so how often?

What kind of attitudes about sex did she grow up with?


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## lover (Sep 13, 2014)

Plan 9 from OS said:


> Why do you think she no longer wants to have sex with you?


I don't think like that, when ever I want to do sex I can but my problem is I can't get any passion from my wife side.. When I ask why like that than she tell me she don't like sex but I can do when ever I want...


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## lover (Sep 13, 2014)

Yes, she like sex with me I feel this but early months of our marriage. 

She only did sex with me according to her.

First time when we did she feel pain after year she felt pain couples of days ago

Yes she orgasm and masturbate

Her brothers teach her that if anyone even try to touch you than hit him.. She hit many boys in her childhood...


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

You have to learn how to seduce your wife. How to get her aroused before you even touch her. How to get her in the mood long before you get to the bedroom. There are many books and web site that will provide you with tips and tricks to seduce a woman, some of them are good, some stupid and some are dangerous. Due to the language barrier it might be best for you to read a bunch of books that can be translated into your language.

I don't think your wife orgasms, if she did, she'd be okay with having sex and she would like it. So being able to make love to your wife and give her organs so might be the most important thing you need to learn.


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## lover (Sep 13, 2014)

*Re: My wife doesn't satisfy me sexually*



lover said:


> I am 27 years old and my wife 32 years old, many times she don't want to do sex when I ask why she reply she lazy to do... And when we do it seems she don't have any passion... what can I do?





lover said:


> I do every normal thing to create passion e.g lips kiss, try to kiss whole body etc
> She don't like if I touch her part with my finger.. She feel pain if I touch her breast couple of time even I touch very softly..
> I want she love me like I love her at least kiss on my chest kiss on my body etc
> Many times when I want to do she just lying and ask me to do fast and after this she continue playing games on mobile or on facebook.. Mostly cooking games....
> ...


Above are some more detail, every time my wife orgasms when I do sex with her, my sex drive is 4 times more high than my wife.. please give some suggestions 
Thank you


Anon Pink said:


> You have to learn how to seduce your wife. How to get her aroused before you even touch her. How to get her in the mood long before you get to the bedroom. There are many books and web site that will provide you with tips and tricks to seduce a woman, some of them are good, some stupid and some are dangerous. Due to the language barrier it might be best for you to read a bunch of books that can be translated into your language.
> 
> I don't think your wife orgasms, if she did, she'd be okay with having sex and she would like it. So being able to make love to your wife and give her organs so might be the most important thing you need to learn.


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

If your wife isn't allowing you to touch her erogenous zones at all, there is no way she is orgasming.


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## john117 (May 20, 2013)

What nationality or culture are you two from? I'm guessing Asian? Strict family upbringing? 

Is she open to therapy?


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## john117 (May 20, 2013)

intheory said:


> I don't have brothers, but I find it odd that brothers would give their sister instructions on what to do if a guy ever tried to touch her. Not really a brother's job, imo.



If the father is a absent or passed or not very involved an older sibling could take the initiative and teach his sisters... Not uncommon.


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## Big Mama (Mar 24, 2014)

The first thing that comes to my mind is sexual abuse at some point in her past. If her brothers advised her to hit males who tried stuff with her and she hit lots. Does that mean that many men tried to hurt her. That is what I am hearing. 

I have a history of sexual abuse. I don't like my husband touching my private parts. I don't like my husband touching my breasts. I do Orgasm, but not with my husband. After going to therapy for 2 years, I have learned that this is just the way I am and it is largely due to rape and sexual abuse as a child. 

After reading over everything you wrote, I think back to me and my situation. I had sex with my husband when we first got married. But it was not because I wanted to. I did it because that is what a good wife does. Now, 20 years later, I still do it because that is w hat a good wife does. The only difference is now my husband knows the mental pain sex causes me. Some times I cry during sex, so I request that he hurries up. Sometimes I cry afterwards. This crying is due to over loading of senses and memories that are from along time ago. It is not that he is hurting me, or I am sad or that he did any to me. It Is just a reaction I have no control over. 

My husband is confused as to why I used to have sex with him and now I do not want to. I didn't want to way back then either. I just didn't know how to say so. Does any of this sound familiar to you?


Could this be part of why your wife does what she does? The cultural difference may be part of the issue to. In some cultures abuse is more widely accepted them it is in others. 

If you need to talk on a more personal level and want to PM me please don't hesitate. I hope there is something I can do to help or that you find the answers you are looking for here from this site. It sounds like therapy would be a good thing for you and your wife.


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