# how many couples share fantasies?



## marko (Jul 22, 2013)

I tell my wife all my fantasies, I concentrate on the ones that turn her on more of course. sometimes I have sexy dreams and tell her all about them, which of course turn her on more.

something I have been doing for years is writing erotica, any and all types of scenarios. my wife really enjoys reading these and we even act them out or talk about them during sex. 

the only problem for me though is my wife does not seem to have much imagination with regards to fantasies, either that or she does not trust me with them. I have given her no reason for this and I encourage any type of scenario she brings up.

typically I have to really push to get anything out of her for a fantasy, if she tells me anything it usually involves me in some way. I really want her to have her own sexual identity and enjoy what she wants to dream about. 

so who else talks about the stuff that turns them on?


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## keeper63 (Mar 22, 2012)

I am the one who seems to provide the most material/imagination for our sexual fantasies. My wife likes to hear about mine, and sometimes, we will act them out, but not always.

What is more difficult, however, is getting her to express her fantasies. In 25 years of marriage, I have dragged maybe half a dozen fantasies out of her, and they were relatively tame (having sex outdoors in public where we might get caught, having phone sex when I was away in extended business travel, light spanking, etc.), but we did manage to act them out.

I did tell her recently that I would like to do 69 until both of us orgasm, which we had tried many times unsuccessfully (mostly because we can't focus on our own orgasms wile trying to give each other an orgasm). Not long ago, she initiated a sexual encounter whereby we did manage to 69 to completion for both of us (her first then me). Part of what made it hot was she kept telling me that she was going to fulfill this fantasy for me leading up to the act. Once she came, and then I blew spectacularly, she said "fantasy fulfilled".

So although I would like to have her express her fantasies to me more frequently than she does, I do have to say that it is a LOT of fun to tell her mine, and have her enthusiastically want to fulfill them.


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## marko (Jul 22, 2013)

pretty well all the stuff I have been able to get out of her is two actors she lusted after and a couple scenarios with sex on beach or a pool, and she expressed interest in a threesome with two men, of course one being me. 

pretty standard fare really. wish she would come up with some freaky stuff once in awhile. I have lots of things in my head but it is more fun hearing the stuff she wants.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

marko said:


> I tell my wife all my fantasies, I concentrate on the ones that turn her on more of course. sometimes I have sexy dreams and tell her all about them, which of course turn her on more.
> 
> something I have been doing for years is writing erotica, any and all types of scenarios. my wife really enjoys reading these and we even act them out or talk about them during sex.
> 
> ...


What you said right here is ME and MY HUSBAND in reverse.. my fantasy life is more creative, more erotic, more vibrant, I am the writer (though I don't write Erotica)... I am more the verbal expressor with the creative FUN ideas to act out... he is happy to go along... indulge me.. ..so I am not going to whine too much...

But trying to get him to explain a fantasy... I might get a "deer in the headlights" look... all he can come up with is .. "You fulfill them all".. Ok ,that is sweet... but really.. I think he could do a little better than that !

I know he loves watching naked women dance (went to a Strip club for a time)... fantasies of women coming on to him... It's all about the aggressive chick wanting to USE him for her pleasure... 

I've gotten a little more out of him over the years.. but it's like pulling teeth.. best to not go there.. and just let him BE him.. ...more of a romantic sentimental sensual lover....and of course, I love this too.


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## YupItsMe (Sep 29, 2011)

145,456,123 in the United States alone. Whew!


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## Batman4691 (Jun 24, 2013)

For me it's been about 10 years since my wife and I really got into the fantasy sharing department. So I will have to defer to that time period.

I'm similar to marko, the OP, in that my sexual fantasy world was very specific and detailed, down to the last grind and moan.
My wife at first needed some prodding, and coaxing, to just have her divulge her "vanilla" fantasies, but after a few months and sharing some of mine with her she started to open up and tell me some of the hottest, and kinkiest stuff I could ever imagine, with the elevator/office MFM threesome as her favorite.

After about 10 years of marriage, my wife and I could really get into telling one another our deepest and darkest fantasies. We would actually read Penthouse Forum Letters aloud during foreplay years ago.
Really some fun and exciting stuff.


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## RClawson (Sep 19, 2011)

All I have ever been able to get out of my wife is that her fantasy is to be seduced by someone a bit more mature and debonair. I think it is a 007 fantasy.

Imagine my surprise when I discovered she is a spanko at heart.


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## livelaughlovenow (Apr 23, 2012)

marko said:


> I tell my wife all my fantasies, I concentrate on the ones that turn her on more of course. sometimes I have sexy dreams and tell her all about them, which of course turn her on more.
> 
> something I have been doing for years is writing erotica, any and all types of scenarios. my wife really enjoys reading these and we even act them out or talk about them during sex.
> 
> ...


Maybe she is nervous. I know the one time I shared with my husband (who claims he has non) it totally backfired.


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## rogerqbah (Jul 29, 2013)

she expressed interest in a threesome with two men, of course one being me.


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## PilotofThePurpleTwilight (Jul 20, 2013)

Interesting. My wife claims her fantasy is having sex in a fancy hotel room. a fancy view, champagne on ice, and a fancy romantic dinner ..

Mmyeah, I get it .. but for some reason, this doesn't seem like a sexual fantasy to me. We did do this a couple of times .. and one time we didn't even have sex (she forgot her birth control). 

Unfortunately this is a pretty expensive fantasy, so I can't do it all the time.

She's never asked me what my sexual fantasies are. Is it possible she doesn't have any? Or is she suppressing them?


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

woman who don't want to share their fantasies are affraid you will look down on them because their really out there. like rape,bondage,or two guys at once.

JMHO


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## pctomm (Jul 30, 2013)

chillymorn said:


> woman who don't want to share their fantasies are affraid you will look down on them because their really out there. like rape,bondage,or two guys at once.
> 
> JMHO


I wonder about that, 10 years and I've never heard a single one out of my wife.


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## Always_Ready (Jul 23, 2013)

I don't share my fantasies mostly because I have never been asked. Plus, I think they are a little out there.


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## Omgitsjoe (Oct 1, 2012)

The Mrs and I often share our fantasies and it's usually discussed while I'm giving her a sensual head to toe massage ...... makes for great foreplay  !!!! 

And oh she gets a wonderful ,long massage cause I enjoy taking my time since I love hearing her sexy and naughty fantasies. A win win situation IMHO


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## malmale (Oct 5, 2010)

what if the mrs feels that sexual fantasy is something dirty?


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

My STBXW never shared a single sexual fantasy, wish, or even a "can we try..." in 18 years of marriage. I strongly suspect it's because she was low drive, and her mind simply didn't wander down those paths.

My SO is strongly sexual, and we've been sharing fantasies since the first day we were in touch. We've lived out many of them, and we'll reminisce about our favourites as foreplay or during sex.

I much prefer things the way they are with my SO... 

C


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## tracyishere (Dec 2, 2012)

I've never been afraid to share my fantasies, although my H was shocked by one of them. I didn't care, it's not his fantasy its mine. And tbh I don't really want it to become reality. It's fun just thinking about it/dreaming about it. 

My H also has shared his fantasies. Sometimes I get confused though on whether or not he wants them to remain a fantasy or not. 

Allot of things we've tried already. So, the experiments are a liitle more (hmmm what's the word?) out there?


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## malmale (Oct 5, 2010)

for those who are willing to experiment, hey, go ahead and experience something new and refreshing, it will work wonders for ur relationship!


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## tracyishere (Dec 2, 2012)

malmale said:


> what if the mrs feels that sexual fantasy is something dirty?


When my H and I first starting dating I didn't even know what a clit was. To have me share my dirtiest secret was a lengthy process of building sexual trust. My H has always been very excited about "teaching" me about sex. And I really enjoyed learning. He used all different kinds of methods to introduce the sexual world to me. We did allot of reading, watching porn, going to strip clubs, touching, getting the mirror out, looking at books and photos...etc. His willingness and patience was what made me comfortable with my sexuality. If it were not for him, I'd probably be clueless and have the lame Hotel romance as a fantasy as well.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## malmale (Oct 5, 2010)

good for the both of u! in fact, it gets kinda boring if a guy would share his fantasy to his spouse, coz hey, which guy do not fantasize about sex? I think men generally think about sex 24-7!haha

but then again, if a lady would open up and share her dirty little secrets with the partner, this will definitely open up a new chapter in their sex life!

honestly, I have yet to see guys complaining if their partners were to share their naughty desires with them!


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## FemBot (May 1, 2013)

I am in an opposite situation! My fantasies are crazy dirty and my H's are mild and romantic. Sometimes I feel bad telling him about mine but he enjoys them and gets super turned on so I try not to hold back.

Have you read the books by Nancy Friday? Secret garden and Men in love? Both are a compilation of fantasies that men and women have. Maybe if she read some of it she would open up? It helped me realize my dirty fantasies were totally normal


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## malmale (Oct 5, 2010)

FemBot said:


> I am in an opposite situation! My fantasies are crazy dirty and my H's are mild and romantic. Sometimes I feel bad telling him about mine but he enjoys them and gets super turned on so I try not to hold back.
> 
> Have you read the books by Nancy Friday? Secret garden and Men in love? Both are a compilation of fantasies that men and women have. Maybe if she read some of it she would open up? It helped me realize my dirty fantasies were totally normal


I can imagine ur hubby's eyes glitter the moment u reveal to him about your naughty desires! don't worry, it is simply being human that we fantasize about sex! 

but blame the society stigma for giving women a bad repo if they would fantasize about sex! the sad part, in some cultures, women are even stoned to death for openly revealing about their sexual desires


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