# Husband has been good to me lately



## katiekr (Nov 24, 2016)

My husband has been good to me lately since yesterday.I was almost sexually assaulted yesterday and was a little shaken up at first.Was about to get in my car after grocery shopping which I already put the groceries in my car.A man came up to going after my chest and butt area.Luckily I had my .380 under the driver's seat,have a concealed weapons permit and pointed it at him grabbing it.Said don't shoot me and I wanted to.Luckily two witnesses came and held him until police came.Found out I was not his only victim,two other women did id him that sexually assaulted them.My husband came out to check on me and saw I was ok.We hugged and he has been there for me ever since.I am still shaken up and going to make an appointment with a therapist.My husband saw I did not sleep very well at night.My husband credits a good friend of his for teaching me how to defend myself with a hand gun.This friend of his said I did a good job learning from him.


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## EunuchMonk (Jan 3, 2016)

Is he not always good to you? I am not familiar with your story.


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

Congratulations on stopping an assault. I admire your self control in not shooting him on the spot. It would have been wrong, but some people would have done it. 

If you say your husband has been "nice to you" - maybe he assumes that you were stressed and upset by the attack?


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## MSalmoides (Sep 29, 2016)

...


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

katiekr said:


> My husband has been good to me lately since yesterday.I was almost sexually assaulted yesterday and was a little shaken up at first.Was about to get in my car after grocery shopping which I already put the groceries in my car.A man came up to going after my chest and butt area.Luckily I had my .380 under the driver's seat,have a concealed weapons permit and pointed it at him grabbing it.Said don't shoot me and I wanted to.Luckily two witnesses came and held him until police came.Found out I was not his only victim,two other women did id him that sexually assaulted them.My husband came out to check on me and saw I was ok.We hugged and he has been there for me ever since.I am still shaken up and going to make an appointment with a therapist.My husband saw I did not sleep very well at night.My husband credits a good friend of his for teaching me how to defend myself with a hand gun.This friend of his said I did a good job learning from him.


I have experienced something similar to this, I am a man and I basically walked into the aftermath of an assault like this. The guy had a gun and I put the woman assaulted in front of me and we ran. I actually thought I was going to be shot while I was running but I wanted her to get away. I am so sorry this happened to you, you have my sympathies. Also thank you for your bravery because of you someone else won't have to go through what we did. 

I just want to warn you be prepared for PTSD, it took me about 2 years to feel like myself again. Mine took the form of fear of heart attacks, it was actually surreal and completely irrational, but that is PTSD. Also don't be afraid to talk to someone and get yourself meds if you need them. I was on them for 10 years after this. I know it seems like you avoided the worst but just going through what you did is more then enough. It might also be strange for you to have people congratulating you when you feel like you just went through the worst experience of your life. That's true just because you prevailed doesn't mean you weren't assaulted. The person who was actually assaulting in my situation was effected strongly for about 5 years and still isn't the same an never will be 13 years later. It may not seem like it but you will be able to move on and be yourself again. 

Finally I know this is not the purpose of this post but I want you to be aware and make sure your husband is aware that this will effect him too, deeper then he may know. I am sure he feels it is his job to protect you and it will be hard for him to see you suffer and to feel so powerless in this situation. If he is bonded to you it is scary to see someone you love go through a life and death situation. It would probably be a good idea for both of you to go and talk to someone. 

Please understand I am not at all comparing your pain to his, you went though this he is only going through it by proxy, but I think it is important for you to be aware that he will also be affected by it. 

Again I am sorry.


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## katiekr (Nov 24, 2016)

sokillme said:


> I have experienced something similar to this, I am a man and I basically walked into the aftermath of an assault like this. The guy had a gun and I put her in front of me and we ran. I actually thought I was going to be shot while I was running. I am so sorry this happened to you, you have my sympathies. Also thank you for your bravery because of you someone else won't have to go through what we did.
> 
> I just want to warn you be prepared for PTSD, it took me about 2 years to feel like myself again. Also don't be afraid to talk to someone and get yourself meds if you need them. I know it seems like you avoided the worst but just going through it is enough. The person who was actually assaulting was effected strongly for about 5 years and still isn't the same an never will be 13 years later. You won't also but you will be able to move on and be healthy.
> 
> ...


It hit him hard,he knew I did not deserve it at all.A friend of mine told me about a great therapist that works with sexual crime victims and calling tomorrow to set up an appointment.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

katiekr said:


> It hit him hard,he knew I did not deserve it at all.A friend of mine told me about a great therapist that works with sexual crime victims and calling tomorrow to set up an appointment.


Good. Maybe even go together a few times. It's OK to be angry, sad, scared, hopeless, confused. I went through all those emotions. It is a new reality you have to get used to. But don't feel like you will feel like this forever. Like everything else painful in your life, time in this case it a good thing. It's very rare when I have those feelings about the situation in my life. It's kind of like a scar, it's there but it just becomes a part of your life.


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## katiekr (Nov 24, 2016)

sokillme said:


> Good. Maybe even go together a few times. It's OK to be angry, sad, scared, hopeless, confused. I went through all those emotions. It is a new reality you have to get used to. But don't feel like you will feel like this forever. Like everything else painful in your life, time in this case it a good thing. It's very rare when I have those feelings about the situation in my life. It's kind of like a scar, it's there but it just becomes a part of your life.


I see this therapist on Thursday,called today and my husband can come with me too for support.We had a talk with our 17 and 13 year old daughters on this last night and told them report it right away if a sexual crime ever happens to them.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

katiekr said:


> I see this therapist on Thursday,called today and my husband can come with me too for support.We had a talk with our 17 and 13 year old daughters on this last night and told them report it right away if a sexual crime ever happens to them.


Good how are you feeling? Has it hit you yet or are you still on adrenaline?


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## katiekr (Nov 24, 2016)

sokillme said:


> Good how are you feeling? Has it hit you yet or are you still on adrenaline?


I am still getting over it a little bit.Met with a police detective today,interviewed me for a few minutes and then with the prosecutor.Prosecutor said this man that attempted the sexual assault on my is going to be charged with 3 counts of sexual assault on Friday facing 10 years based on his record.He served time for raping an ex girlfriend of his,served 5 years for this.Plus he is charged for not registering as a sex offender for the rape conviction which is a 5 year sentence for that.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

katiekr said:


> I am still getting over it a little bit.Met with a police detective today,interviewed me for a few minutes and then with the prosecutor.Prosecutor said this man that attempted the sexual assault on my is going to be charged with 3 counts of sexual assault on Friday facing 10 years based on his record.He served time for raping an ex girlfriend of his,served 5 years for this.Plus he is charged for not registering as a sex offender for the rape conviction which is a 5 year sentence for that.


Jesus! 10 years? seems like they should have enough to put him away for good. Just remember the crap that comes from the aftermath of this can creep up on you when you least expect it. And it may not seem to be the same thing, like it may not be fear when you are in a parking lot, it could be a new hyper-vigilance that suddenly creeps up on you. That is what it was for me. Didn't seem related but it was. 

Let me know how the counseling goes.


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## katiekr (Nov 24, 2016)

sokillme said:


> Jesus! 10 years? seems like they should have enough to put him away for good. Just remember the crap that comes from the aftermath of this can creep up on you when you least expect it. And it may not seem to be the same thing, like it may not be fear when you are in a parking lot, it could be a new hyper-vigilance that suddenly creeps up on you. That is what it was for me. Didn't seem related but it was.
> 
> Let me know how the counseling goes.


Prosecutor is putting it up to 20 years.Found out he molested a couple little girls as well today too.He is not getting out


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## katiekr (Nov 24, 2016)

Seen the therapist on Thursday,I do have PTSD which I am on medication on now for it.This man has been charged with 3 counts of sexual assault,child molestation for molesting a little girl including not registering as a sex offender.


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## dianaelaine59 (Aug 15, 2016)

Wow Katie .... Big gentle hugs!


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