# do men have mood swing



## muguremaina (Aug 20, 2014)

i love engaging in this men clubhouse, because i need to understand my man from a general view of how men feel.
now my fiancee has been acting cold lately like last night he picked me up from work n he never at all said a word to me unless when i ask a question which hes reluctant in answering as well.
when i ask if hes okay he raises hes voice" did i say anything is wrong?, i am fine" now from that i realised he seriously has a problem he wount share we slept same bed not talking. this feeling makes me feel lonely and rejected,
i have done nothing wrong at all, so i dont know whats happening.
i feel like i equally wount talk to him but something tells me to.
what do i do guyz?


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## Rooster2014 (Aug 23, 2014)

muguremaina said:


> i love engaging in this men clubhouse, because i need to understand my man from a general view of how men feel.
> now my fiancee has been acting cold lately like last night he picked me up from work n he never at all said a word to me unless when i ask a question which hes reluctant in answering as well.
> when i ask if hes okay he raises hes voice" did i say anything is wrong?, i am fine" now from that i realised he seriously has a problem he wount share we slept same bed not talking. this feeling makes me feel lonely and rejected,
> i have done nothing wrong at all, so i dont know whats happening.
> ...


Yes guys have mood swings. lots of things can cause that. Issues at work, feeling desrespected, lack of sex. General depression. Just to name a few. Give I'm a little space. See what happens. He will end up wanting to talk.


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## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

muguremaina said:


> now my fiancee has been acting cold lately like last night he picked me up from work n he never at all said a word to me unless when i ask a question which hes reluctant in answering as well.
> when i ask if hes okay he raises hes voice" did i say anything is wrong?, i am fine" now from that i realised he seriously has a problem he wount share we slept same bed not talking. this feeling makes me feel lonely and rejected,
> i have done nothing wrong at all, so i dont know whats happening.
> i feel like i equally wount talk to him but something tells me to.
> what do i do guyz?


Anyone can have mood swings.
But from what you've describe there , it sounds like " silent treatment " to me , which is a form of abuse.

How long have you two been together?

If your partner had something that's bothering him , ignoring you and giving the cold shoulder isn't a legitimate way of communication. He could probably say that he needs time to figure out whatever's bothering him , and put your mind at rest.

Seems to me he's punishing you either for something you did or didn't do.

Either way, it's abusive.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

Caribbean Man said:


> Anyone can have mood swings.
> But from what you've describe there ,* it sounds like " silent treatment " to me , which is a form of abuse.*
> 
> How long have you two been together?
> ...


:iagree:

Can read about this behavior here & how it destructs relationships...

*** *Stonewalling* -







also known as "the Silent treatment". .. stonewalling is the absolute refusal to consider your partner’s perspective. If you listen at all, you do it dismissively or contemptuously.This is the passive-aggressive stance many people take during a fight. It's the "Nothing's wrong, I'm fine!" said even when there is clearly something wrong. 

Other common songs of the stonewaller are:“Just leave me alone…”...“Do whatever you want"....“End of conversation"..."that's enough"....

Stonewalling: How to recognize and fix ......... How to Ruin a Perfectly Good Relationship - Stonewall


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## ReidWright (May 15, 2014)

Yes, we do! 

NO WE DON'T!!!


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## commonsenseisn't (Aug 13, 2014)

I've worked with a number of guys who I certainly considered to be moody little crybaby sucky mouthed passive aggressive pouters.


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## texasoutlaw82 (Dec 27, 2013)

Yes, we have mood swings. There could be any number of reasons causing him to act the way he is acting. Ideally, the best thing for him to do would be to attempt at verbalizing his issue to you in constructive manner. 

Consider approaching him with an open mind and just tell him you recognize he's upset and that you'd love to hear what, if anything, is bothering him.


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## richie33 (Jul 20, 2012)

It's that time of the month for him.


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## 4x4 (Apr 15, 2014)

He's processing something in his mind and hasn't finished yet. It may or may not be about you at all. I know I often go "in my head" when I'm trying to figure things out or if I'm just in a bad mood about something and too overheated to let it out without losing my cool.

I would take a compassionate tone and move in for physical touch to help get him out of his head. Show him that his pain is your pain. If it's not about you, you should be able to breach the walls and get him talking.

Edit: I say go in for "physical touch" because that's my love language. It may be different for him.


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## Bobby5000 (Oct 19, 2011)

Do read Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus dealing with the different ways men and women address problems and issues. 

Men go in the cave, women vocalize. That's where the perception/myth that women could not deal with pressured situations, because women talked through them and acknowledged the problem, the perception of some was that they were having difficulty dealing with it. In fact, women have a lower rate of heart attacks, death after divorce or death of a spouse, indicating their greater capability to deal with stress.

That aside, you have to evaluate how often this happens. You do have a right to discuss, address, and try to solve problems. If you are rehashing the same issues, he has a legitimate concern


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## Sunburn (Jul 9, 2012)

Mood swings or for others it's called "down time", the default isn't always "silent treatment" and it's not intentionally "abusive".

Can we have some more victims please!

Most men aren't like most women, we don't have the need to share every detail of our lives and when we do share it's when we're good and ready...... on OUR schedule.

If you want to understand your fiance' better have him take the Briggs - Myers Test, or both of you take it. There are several sites to choose from, this one is free:

Personality test based on C. Jung and I. Briggs Myers type theory

It's _generally_ pretty good and a few of a persons answers could depend on the time of day or a recent personal event but the personality type that is deduced from the answers is usually consistent. It's not 100% but it'll probably get you a better understanding of him. 

Of course the both of you could/should read The 5 Languages of Love and a couple other "help" books that are often touted on TAM.


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

It's not me, it's you. No, really, it is.


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## soccermom2three (Jan 4, 2013)

muguremaina said:


> i love engaging in this men clubhouse, because i need to understand my man from a general view of how men feel.
> now my fiancee has been acting cold lately like last night he picked me up from work n he never at all said a word to me unless when i ask a question which hes reluctant in answering as well.
> when i ask if hes okay he raises hes voice" did i say anything is wrong?, i am fine" now from that i realised he seriously has a problem he wount share we slept same bed not talking. this feeling makes me feel lonely and rejected,
> i have done nothing wrong at all, so i dont know whats happening.
> ...


What you describe is very similar to my FIL. He can go to being completely fine to not fine within a day. He can go weeks without speaking to my MIL. I'm sure it started out small like your fiancé but it gradually got worse. My MIL, husband and his brothers grew up walking on eggshells around my FIL. I think he has a personality disorder of some sort. My MIL and FIL's marriage is the worst one I've ever witnessed and that's saying a lot considering my Dad had an affair.


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## Forest (Mar 29, 2014)

Yeah, some do, but I personally don't see the mood issue in men anything like it is in women.

I think a male's mood swings are much fewer in nature, and much less pronounced.

Picture a long line with a few dips and rises for men.
For women, picture a line that looks like a cardiac patient in the ring with Mike Tyson.


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

I idle at irritated


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## 4x4 (Apr 15, 2014)

Ran into a picture version of my response from another TAM thread. LOL.









Thanks to Coffee Amore for the find.


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## murphy5 (May 1, 2014)

if it is short term mood swings, lasting like half a day....especially if they are more irritable just before a meal, investigate blood sugar issues. If they are diabetic, or pre-diabetic, their blood sugar variations can do odd things to their emotional health. There are testing strips spouse can pee on and tell you if there is likely a problem. 

The odd thing about undiagnosed diabetes, sometimes it feels good to eat candy bars, sweet drinks, tons of liquids...becaue it temporarily gives the person energy, But then half hour later the blood sugar goes even higher, and more of the same problem comes back.


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## dormant (Apr 3, 2012)

Yes, we do have mood swings. In fact, yesterday I woke up in a bad mood and have no definitive reason for it. I do suffer with depression, but yesterday was different than normal. I also have diabetes. I know that can contribute to it too.


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## southbound (Oct 31, 2010)

I guess it depends on how you define mood swings. I'm sure i am in different moods from time to time, but I'm in a good mood most of the time, and there is always a reason why I may be in a bad mood, and i won't mind telling a person what is wrong.

If mood swings means I am in a good mood one minute and in a bad mood later for no apparent reason and try to pretend like I'm not in a different mood, or that one never knows which mood i may be in today, then the answer is no, I do not have mood swings.


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## SadSamIAm (Oct 29, 2010)

Picking him up from 'WORK' might be the issue. 

I drive home from work. Takes me about 15 minutes. By that time, any stress from work is gone.

I can honestly say, that the only mood swings I have are caused by rejection. When we are having sex every 3 or 4 days, then I am in a great mood. 

Now if we had a few months having sex every 3 or 4 days, I might find out that I have other mood swings, but haven't had the luck of finding out.


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

of course we......no we don't


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

Well I told the phone monkey at my mortgage bank I would hunt her down and kill her like the tigers and elephants in her little village at home if she didn't scootch her sweetcheeks over to some other monkey who could do something productive. Then she did and we all had a good laugh.


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## Rooster2014 (Aug 23, 2014)

Runs like Dog said:


> Well I told the phone monkey at my mortgage bank I would hunt her down and kill her like the tigers and elephants in her little village at home if she didn't scootch her sweetcheeks over to some other monkey who could do something productive. Then she did and we all had a good laugh.


That's Good!!


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