# home to an empty house



## knortoh (Sep 5, 2009)

thanks to everyone I've been hearing from I am sure joining this forum has really helped me in fact 
it's been really strange but for the last few days I have actually felt okay for the first time since my H. left me for the 2nd time. I think it's been 3 months now and I didn't cry at breakfast today. This is an improvement! 
Also I have been thinking (positively) about ways to try and sort my long term financial security out - which is not easy as H. has left me in lurch there and is completely disinterested in this side of life at present - he is only intersted in short term solutions 

But then I just had to take both my kids out - the first to a birthday party and the other one for a night out with friends - and somehow it all got to me.
When I went to the first house all the mums there looked at me like I was from another planet ( I had recently let the mum of the boy having the party know that my H had left me)....and I just felt so uncomfortable...
then at the next house everything looked so ordered and smart and they were off for a lovely night and I suddenly had all these feelings of being disconnected from that sort of life and I am ashamed to say that I also felt envious of their lives - 
and I don't think that I have ever had those sorts of feelings before -

and then I came home to an empty house and everything feels so bereft....


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## Corpuswife (Apr 24, 2009)

I know. After 3 months you'd think you'd fall into place and get used to the idea. I believe for the next few years, ableit less frequently, we will have those times. Normal when you are grieving the loss of something.

I lay in bed last night thinking.."I can't believe this is happening." Not my H and not my relationship.


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## variety (Sep 6, 2009)

fill your house with people who love you, things you like to see eg your favorite flowers and do the things you didn't have the time for .... no more regrets ...... it may startle you or even seem unforgiving but time doesn't stop for anyone and the world will still go around. Don't regret later that you didn't live or tried harder to find more joy in your life.


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## knortoh (Sep 5, 2009)

you're right of course and it is startling that life goes on - and i do still have the capacity to appreciate beauty and experience joy - it still hurts though


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## variety (Sep 6, 2009)

someone taught me if you have a problem, find 30 different ways to overcome it or to alleviate the situation.

start now - to solve the problem of quietening the raw emotions - you will feel better when you have thought of 30 and don't stop there if you have more ideas ....

cheers and have a good night.


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