# Father's Day an affront to single mothers???



## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

So this was a head scratcher to me. So Father's Day has come and gone. I recognize, least in all the places I have lived, that Father's Day isn't as advertised or as commercialized as Mother's Day. That's not what this thread is about though.

Yesterday on fraudbook my GF showes me this rant by some conservative lady who is going on about these feminists who are saying that Father's Day is an affront to feminism and single mothers. I guess the premise is that single mothers are also dad's ??? so they should also be recognized on Father's Day? Course it goes further to all traditional families are wrong and men aren't needed and blah blah blah. 

Have any of you heard of this before? I never heard of such a thing and At first my thought was this is being way WAY overstated, However the level of stupidity in the country is at an all time high so maybe something to it. Anyway I have never heard this opinion expressed out loud just wonder if anyone here has.


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## xxxSHxYZxxx (Apr 1, 2013)

I've been hearing that nonsense for the last 15 or so years. Only the crazy feminists agree. It's just that the crazy feminists are getting louder because it gets rateings. You didn't hear about it as much before because news used to be news. Now it's just entertainment

Sent from my SM-G928T using Tapatalk


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## Amplexor (Feb 13, 2008)

I've seen it before. My thought process is "Sorry your life sucks. Quit trying to make me feel guilty about mine!"


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## Yeswecan (Jul 25, 2014)

Opinions are like a-holes. Everyone has one. I would then say Mother's Day is personal affront to single men with children. 

Let's cancel all holidays and birthdays. No wait, I believe Jehovah Witness do this already. 


Flatulence Book is just a soapbox for nonsense and useless noise.


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti (Apr 23, 2017)

Is Mother's Day an affront to single dads? 

I'm guessing these complainants would say no. 
:scratchhead:


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## chillymorn69 (Jun 27, 2016)

in today age there might be as many single dads as moms. so I guess they should get recognized on mothers day.


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## Herschel (Mar 27, 2016)

I am a firm believer that if you do more than 50% of the parenting, then you are allowed to have a bite from the other Hallmark holiday. Not that any of it really matters much, but why would anyone care if a woman is raising kids by herself or a man, doing the same thing, gets love on the opposite sex's parent day?


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## jb02157 (Apr 16, 2014)

Sounds like another liberal, feminist pile of dodo. This one is so dumb it's actually funny.


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

It's a bullpucky Hallmark Holiday anyway. I just can't care.


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## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

I suppose this could be considered an extension of the recent trend of glorification, pedistalization, and cannonization of motherhood. What was once a day of recognition in Mothers Day has become a day of mother worship, and those who tend to accept it as such will also tend to see recognition of anyone other than Mothers as somehow diminishing the importance of mothers. These types of people also tend to be very defensive and see things in far more black and white terms, and see many situations as zero sum, meaning what is given to one person necessarily has to take something away from someone else.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Pick any crazy idea and you will find some group on the internet who is all behind it.

People who want to be outraged simply need something to be outraged about. 

This is so stupid that it hardly deserves even a mention.


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## m00nman (Nov 29, 2014)

I was raised by a widow. Mothers Day and Fathers Day were viewed as "Hallmark Card" holidays and did not carry the weight of "actual" holidays like Easter or Christmas. 

If anybody is upset by an occasion that affirms the role a parent, relative or any other role model then I submit that they have deeper issues than hurt feelings and that their upbringing was lacking in the true meaning of humility and renders the occasion meaningless to them.


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## jb02157 (Apr 16, 2014)

MJJEAN said:


> It's a bullpucky Hallmark Holiday anyway. I just can't care.


I agree, but the thing that irks me about this is why Mother's Day is such a big deal and Father's Day isn't.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

jb02157 said:


> I agree, but the thing that irks me about this is why Mother's Day is such a big deal and Father's Day isn't.


Both of these days are hallmark days, meaning that they are carried on because retailers make a big deal out of them. There are 'holidays' created to make money.

Mother's day is bigger because traditionally, consumers just spend more money on their mothers. So retailers advertise to the spenders.

Why do people spend more money on their mothers? Well, in a traditional home the mother was the primary care giver to the children. So children tend to have a stronger connection to their mother.

Additionally, gifts and being recognized like this seems to be more important to women than to men. Not sure if this is true, but it's what I read on the topic. Retailers say that men are just harder to shop for. Generally one cannot just buy flowers for daddy.

As more and more women contribute financially, father's day is becoming a bigger thing. And more money is spent on father's day each year. So, if we judge love by money, that's what's going on.

Each family is different. My husband typically wanted a big thing made of father's day and ignored mothers day. I taught the kids to honor both equally.


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## Satya (Jun 22, 2012)

People will B about anything.

For Father's day, I bought Odo some nice gifts, because I knew his own children wouldn't bother. He could care less about the holiday but I want him to know that he's appreciated. I don't need a holiday to do that, but I think any father would love some appreciation on HIS day.


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## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

Satya said:


> People will B about anything.
> 
> For Father's day, I bought Odo some nice gifts, because I knew his own children wouldn't bother. He could care less about the holiday but I want him to know that he's appreciated. I don't need a holiday to do that, but I think any father would love some appreciation on HIS day.


Honestly, if it wasn't for the bubbling excitement of the kids in the lead up to it, I probably wouldn't even remember that it was Fathers Day. Same with my birthday. To me, it's just another day, not a big deal.


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## Yag-Kosha (Sep 8, 2016)

xxxSHxYZxxx said:


> Only the crazy feminists agree.


And they can get really crazy -- https://witchwind.wordpress.com/2014/10/07/utopia-what-would-a-womens-society-look-like/


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## Herschel (Mar 27, 2016)

jb02157 said:


> I agree, but the thing that irks me about this is why Mother's Day is such a big deal and Father's Day isn't.


I think it tends to deal with that almost all kids have their moms around. In addition, mothers STILL tend to do most of the child rearing aspects in life. Not in my case, but certainly across America. Given those two aspects, the point is to show appreciation to the mother who has bent over backwards for your rotten ass.


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## RoseAglow (Apr 11, 2013)

So some conservative person went on a rant. She probably found some meme somewhere and thought she would tag all Feminists with some loony thing. That's a thing, you know? Just like some liberals find things to rant against conservatives and attribute all kinds of nonsense to them. 

While I agree that emotions and craziness are pretty high right now in the US, being Against Father's Day is not a Thing. I would argue that today's best-known and most-respected feminist is Sheryl Sandberg, of Facebook and "Lean In" fame. She has said that one of the best advantages for a woman is a great, supportive spouse. She sings the praises of good Dads. Most of today's feminists fight for maternal and paternal leave, and most of the Stay-At-Home-Dads are probably married to feminist women, who are willing to go out and be the breadwinners. I've yet to ever come across any serious movement to get rid of Father's Day.

So I think your first thoughts on the issue are right. It was overblown and really, probably just a spokesperson riling up the base.


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## alexm (Nov 29, 2008)

Satya said:


> People will B about anything.
> 
> For Father's day, I bought Odo some nice gifts, because I knew his own children wouldn't bother. He could care less about the holiday but I want him to know that he's appreciated. I don't need a holiday to do that, but I think any father would love some appreciation on HIS day.


As a stepfather raising somebody else's kids (and not having any of my own) I like the appreciation 

I got an unbelievably heartfelt note inside my card from the 11 year old, which I will keep forever. It made me tear up (him, too).

The 16 year got me nothing, though his girlfriend bought a few gifts for me, lol! He signed a card, though, so I guess that's something. Teenagers...

My wife, who usually at least gets me a card, didn't give me anything this year.

For me, I try to instill thoughtfulness in our kids, and things like Mothers, Fathers and Grandparents day, as silly as they are, are a good tool for this, IMO. It's one day out of the year where you can show some appreciation for the people who raised you. Handmade cards or gifts, or a store bought card with a nice note in it (not just your name) are thoughtful and mean something.

At the end of the day, it's just a way to say 'thank you' to the people who've sacrificed so much for you, and I see nothing wrong with it.


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## chillymorn69 (Jun 27, 2016)

Mothers day and fathers day are hallmark days for sure.


SO WHAT.

Mothers and fathers should be given a day and children should let them know that they appreciate them even if its a stupid card that you over paid for.

Kids need to learn how to show appreciation and this is one of the ways to teach them.

My friend whos daughter was excluded from his life as much as possible as she grew up. Because he had standards he pushed her to do good in school and tried to teach her right from wrong. his x ended up letting her drop out of school. he tried to reconnect with her a couple of months ago with limited success. he tried to take her out for fathers day and she text him that because he wasn't there for her she don't really want any part of spending time with him. 

He was pretty sad this fathers day.


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## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

When I was in elementary school, making a card or some little craft project for Mother's Day and Father's Day was pretty standard fare. Now there are a fair number of schools in some parts of the country that don't do that anymore because it reportedly makes the children either upset or confused and offends the single or non-traditional parents. To avoid offending anyone, they just don't do anything to recognize the holidays. 

Honestly, I don't much care about Mother's Day, or any of the other Hallmark Holidays, but I do find it a little unsettling that our society has become so focused on being politically correct that we're afraid to celebrate anyone for anything in case it makes someone else feel left out.


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## chillymorn69 (Jun 27, 2016)

Herschel said:


> I think it tends to deal with that almost all kids have their moms around. In addition, mothers STILL tend to do most of the child rearing aspects in life. Not in my case, but certainly across America. Given those two aspects, the point is to show appreciation to the mother who has bent over backwards for your rotten ass.


not so sure that mothers do most. I used to think like this but as I got older and looked around I don't buy it. I see just as many fathers that are the better more involved parent than the mother.


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## Mr. Nail (Apr 26, 2011)

Well I disagree with almost everything today, Guess I'm just in the mood. Fathers day is a totally commercialized holiday. Historically Fathers day was started to honor a Single Father. The holiday was so unpopular that it had to be saved by retailers, looking to sell men's fashions and accessories. In modern day the sales have shifted to grills and tools. Making fathers day Saturday possibly the worst day to visit a home improvement store.

Personally I believe that Fathers day has become nothing more than a guilt holiday. After being gifted at valentines, and mothers day many women seem to feel that they really should do something to make it more even by giving a man a present. While this may in fact assuage some guilt, the Men rarely feel the love because of the traditions of Fathers day. First the gifts, Tools to complete the "Honey-do" projects that he has already been nagged about. This is the rough equivalent of giving a woman a vacuum cleaner for mothers day. Grills, Traditionally Mothers day includes an elaborate Brunch to free the mother from cooking on her special day, while the man is expected to cook, adding an extra duty to his day. Ties, are in effect telling a man that he doesn't know how to dress and that wearing a little noose around his neck somehow makes him look successful, when in fact it is a sign of servitude.

The accidental upside of fathers day over mothers day is that it isn't held during the traditional school year thus freeing men from receiving macaroni necklaces. 

If Fathers day is an affront to anyone it is an affront to fathers. Of course Single mothers however they may feel are free to ignore the father of their children. They are also free to persecute him, bad mouth him poison the children against him, defraud him and so on. It is a bit of a surprise that so many single mothers encourage their children to gift and honor their fathers on this day, but many of them do do exactly this.

This year I got 2 text messages and a kick in the shins. And I did grill. about average emotional gain.


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

jb02157 said:


> I agree, but the thing that irks me about this is why Mother's Day is such a big deal and Father's Day isn't.


I always assumed Mother's Day was advertised heavier to remind the kids...since it was historically the Mom who orchestrated family gatherings. 

Also, Mother's Day is typically a brunch at a nice restaurant while Father's Day is a family cook out. Why? I always thought it was because dads couldn't be counted on to organize a family gathering, shop for it, clean for it and cook during it, and then to clean up after it...so reservations instead.

Lastly, there are some feminists who also think women should free bleed. They are an extremely small group who are rarely ever invited to anyone's home... those kooky ideas that are fringe...are FRINGE!

As a card carrying liberal feminist hear my declaration: Fathers deserve to have a special day of their own just like mothers have.


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## GTdad (Aug 15, 2011)

Anon Pink said:


> Also, Mother's Day is typically a brunch at a nice restaurant while Father's Day is a family cook out. Why? I always thought it was because dads couldn't be counted on to organize a family gathering, shop for it, clean for it and cook during it, and then to clean up after it...so reservations instead.


I love cook-outs for Father's Day! Of course, it's me doing the cooking, but hey, that's what dads do, right?

I can't even muster the tiniest of give-a-****s about the story, though. Whatever hare-brained belief you can concoct, somewhere out there is a zealot who embraces it. I can't be bothered to be bothered by folks like that.


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## Kivlor (Oct 27, 2015)

Wolf1974 said:


> So this was a head scratcher to me. So Father's Day has come and gone. I recognize, least in all the places I have lived, that Father's Day isn't as advertised or as commercialized as Mother's Day. That's not what this thread is about though.
> 
> Yesterday on fraudbook my GF showes me this rant by some conservative lady who is going on about these feminists who are saying that Father's Day is an affront to feminism and single mothers. I guess the premise is that single mothers are also dad's ??? so they should also be recognized on Father's Day? Course it goes further to all traditional families are wrong and men aren't needed and blah blah blah.
> 
> Have any of you heard of this before? I never heard of such a thing and At first my thought was this is being way WAY overstated, However the level of stupidity in the country is at an all time high so maybe something to it. Anyway I have never heard this opinion expressed out loud just wonder if anyone here has.


Yeah, I've heard of it. Feminists are dumb, rabid and crazy. Not that Father's Day is important. Kind of a "meh" faux-holiday.

There's some definite irony in seeing women who are single mothers--a problem 100% their fault--decrying the dads they chose to have kids with. Maybe they should have thought about who they had sex with? Maybe promiscuity is bad? Maybe, if you knew the actual consequences of single-parenthood on children, you might not celebrate your "You go girl! You don't need no man!" ideology? 

"Because my kids don't get to see their daddy that means I'm just as good as 2 parents!"
"Uh, no, it makes you dumb. And you saying that makes you twice as dumb."


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

There is a subset of people who are quick to find a wide variety of things objectionable. Best to just ignore them.


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

There is so much crazy out there that I honestly can't tell if that is satire. 



Yag-Kosha said:


> And they can get really crazy -- https://witchwind.wordpress.com/2014/10/07/utopia-what-would-a-womens-society-look-like/


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## BradWesley2 (Jul 15, 2016)

Mr. Nail said:


> Well I disagree with almost everything today, Guess I'm just in the mood. Fathers day is a totally commercialized holiday. Historically Fathers day was started to honor a Single Father. The holiday was so unpopular that it had to be saved by retailers, looking to sell men's fashions and accessories. In modern day the sales have shifted to grills and tools. Making fathers day Saturday possibly the worst day to visit a home improvement store.
> 
> Personally I believe that Fathers day has become nothing more than a guilt holiday. After being gifted at valentines, and mothers day many women seem to feel that they really should do something to make it more even by giving a man a present. While this may in fact assuage some guilt, the Men rarely feel the love because of the traditions of Fathers day. First the gifts, Tools to complete the "Honey-do" projects that he has already been nagged about. This is the rough equivalent of giving a woman a vacuum cleaner for mothers day. Grills, Traditionally Mothers day includes an elaborate Brunch to free the mother from cooking on her special day, while the man is expected to cook, adding an extra duty to his day. Ties, are in effect telling a man that he doesn't know how to dress and that wearing a little noose around his neck somehow makes him look successful, when in fact it is a sign of servitude.
> 
> ...


Who pissed in your corn flakes this morning?


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

So many people today are *******s. SO freaking many.


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## Phil Anders (Jun 24, 2015)

Outrage merchants abound. Theirs is the stock-in-trade of click-bait and incendiary blog posts. Anything to drive traffic... So I'd question first how many self-avowed feminists actually hold these views re: Fathers Day before buying into the premise. And I'd filter out entirely those people whose mission in life is to seek out stuff to be Greatly Offended by.


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

alexm said:


> As a stepfather raising somebody else's kids (and not having any of my own) I like the appreciation
> 
> I got an unbelievably heartfelt note inside my card from the 11 year old, which I will keep forever. It made me tear up (him, too).
> 
> ...


I think my issue is that the parents and/ or step-parents should be getting that appreciation without being prompted by corporate advertising.

I was raised by a stepfather. Saw my bio father last when I was 4. My mom made damn sure I showed appreciation regularly. My own daughters were raised by DH after exH left state the minute the ink was dry on the D papers. You better believe I made sure they showed their appreciation regularly.

By the way, I am LMAO @ the teenage boy. I'm pretty sure every male in my and my husband's family just signs the card.


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## Mr. Nail (Apr 26, 2011)

BradWesley2 said:


> Who pissed in your corn flakes this morning?


I thought I pretty much covered the answer to that question. It could be the 2 kids who couldn't even text, or it could have been the shin kicker, or it could have been the mob at Home improvement store. pick your favorite. 

My real point is that the people the holiday is for don't really appreciate it. Next year I'll send Fathers day cards to the Single moms I know. They want it, they can have it.


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## Yeswecan (Jul 25, 2014)

EleGirl said:


> Pick any crazy idea and you will find some group on the internet who is all behind it.
> 
> People who want to be outraged simply need something to be outraged about.
> 
> This is so stupid that it hardly deserves even a mention.


I'm outraged!!! Oh never mind. :grin2:


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## Kivlor (Oct 27, 2015)

uhtred said:


> There is so much crazy out there that I honestly can't tell if that is satire.


You know, it's really hard to tell with this particular piece. The whole blog is devoted to that kind of stuff... It could be someone LARPing on the internet, or it could be really what she believes. 

Some choice quotes about the feminist utopia...


> *Military:*
> No more military, no more army, no more wars! It would be illegal for men to hold weapons. Global peace would be the immediate consequence...


Yeah... so when you try this, and the men back-hand your weak, pathetic rears... Or the men from neighboring nation #2 just conquer you...



> *State:*
> States, borders, nations, laws would be abolished and totally dispensed with. Laws mentioning the number of prohibited acts will be kept for men only. Women do not need laws to contain ourselves. Laws were created by the male elite to protect their property from other men.


Again, the neighboring barbarians just conquer you.



> *Economy:*
> Obviously, Slavery, men’s exploitation of women, men’s capitalist systems will be abolished too. The most important aspect of male economy is that it’s based on men’s competitive accumulation of resources (by killing, destroying, commodifying, taking control over, extracting the greatest possible amount of life) and based on production of poisonous, addictive, programmed obsolescent goods — in order to win the patriarchal game of achieving greater domination over women and girls.


Everyone will be forbidden from everything, so that slavery won't exist. You will only do the approved work, at the approved times, for no remuneration, Slave. I mean citizen. Yes... citizen...

Honestly, if taken seriously, I've never seen a better case to argue women shouldn't be allowed to vote. Or own property. Or make decisions about things like children without someone responsible to hold their hands. (Or to stay their hands, as women are drastically more violent to their children than men lol)


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## Mr. Nail (Apr 26, 2011)

EleGirl said:


> *Pick any crazy idea and you will find some group on the internet who is all behind* it.
> 
> People who want to be outraged simply need something to be outraged about.
> 
> This is so stupid that it hardly deserves even a mention.


For example see my posts on this thread. . . ..


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## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

I had sex with my boyfriend twice and also gave him a bj on Father's Day, plus I bought him a steak and a pair of shoes. His kids are teens and I knew they wouldn't have any money or do anything (but they did hug him and wish him happy FD).

I also texted my ex husband, my son, and my brother...wished them all a happy FD and explained why each of them have been a positive male role model in my life. I also texted my son in law, thanking him for being such a great dad to my grandkids. 

My father and my step father are both deceased. So my mom and I hugged each other and offered a little prayer up to both of them from both of us. 

I also texted several other guys I know who are single dads with young children, knowing they wouldn't hear it from anyone else (and they all said that was the case).

Guess us feminists just don't love dads. (Insert eye rolling emoticon)


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## Stang197 (Aug 31, 2015)

Faithful Wife said:


> I had sex with my boyfriend twice and also have him a bj on Father's Day, plus bought him a steak and a pair of shoes. His kids are teens and I knew they wouldn't have any money or do anything (but they did hug him and wish him happy FD).
> 
> I also texted my ex husband, my son, and my brother...wished them all a happy FD and explained why each of them have been a positive male role model in my life. I also texted my son in law, thanking him for being such a great dad to my grandkids.
> 
> ...



Doesn't sound like you are a 3rd wave feminist. The current batch of feminist are nothing like you.


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## Herschel (Mar 27, 2016)

Wow, so many snowflakes that cry about their fake holiday. Wow!


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## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

Stang197 said:


> Doesn't sound like you are a 3rd wave feminist. The current batch of feminist are nothing like you.


Sorry, you are wrong. I know many of them personally (versus just reading random strangers' blogs on the internet and then thinking I can apply what they've said to "all of some group of people"), and yes, the 3rd wave feminists I know are "like me"....they love men, they love fathers, they love children, they love sex.


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## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

Faithful Wife said:


> I had sex with my boyfriend twice and also gave him a bj on Father's Day, plus I bought him a steak and a pair of shoes. His kids are teens and I knew they wouldn't have any money or do anything (but they did hug him and wish him happy FD).
> 
> I also texted my ex husband, my son, and my brother...wished them all a happy FD and explained why each of them have been a positive male role model in my life. I also texted my son in law, thanking him for being such a great dad to my grandkids.
> 
> ...


I think that's really cool that you did that. No one reached out to me like that even though I do for Mother's Day. I think the only three people who said happy Father's Day to me were my daughters and my father which was a return sentiment when I called and wished him one.


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## Stang197 (Aug 31, 2015)

Faithful Wife said:


> Stang197 said:
> 
> 
> > Doesn't sound like you are a 3rd wave feminist. The current batch of feminist are nothing like you.
> ...


Sorry your wrong. Femism is the death of love. It's should be called selfishnism.


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## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

Stang197 said:


> Faithful Wife said:
> 
> 
> > Stang197 said:
> ...


Since you're not a feminist, you don't get to speak for those of us who are. So sorry, you're wrong.


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## Stang197 (Aug 31, 2015)

Faithful Wife said:


> Stang197 said:
> 
> 
> > Faithful Wife said:
> ...



Sorry if you think I'm speaking for you. Never implied these were your thoughts. Kind of selfish and narcissistic to think that when other people express there thoughts, they are speaking for you. And how is an opinion wrong? Why are you the judge? Are you the spokesperson for third wave feminism? Sorry but your wrong.


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## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

@Stang197 ... When you said "Doesn't sound like you are a 3rd wave feminist. The current batch of feminist are nothing like you." you did not state you were opining. You sounded like you were making a statement of fact.

So if you are now correcting yourself and claiming that your words are a statement of opinion not fact, then I fully agree you are entitled to your opinion.

My opinion is that men and women love each other and that the world is turning and people are loving as they always have for all of time and as they always will for all of the future. Love has no death. There are no enemies to love.


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## Stang197 (Aug 31, 2015)

Faithful Wife said:


> @Stang197 ... When you said "Doesn't sound like you are a 3rd wave feminist. The current batch of feminist are nothing like you." you did not state you were opining. You sounded like you were making a statement of fact.
> 
> So if you are now correcting yourself and claiming that your words are a statement of opinion not fact, then I fully agree you are entitled to your opinion.
> 
> My opinion is that men and women love each other and that the world is turning and people are loving as they always have for all of time and as they always will for all of the future. Love has no death. There are no enemies to love.


What I see on tv from this batch of feminist is disgusting. A bunch of foul mouthed girls that have no respect for families. I pray to God every day that my daughter dies not get mixed up with those losers.


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## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

Stang197 said:


> What I see on tv from this batch of feminist is disgusting. A bunch of foul mouthed girls that have no respect for families. I pray to God every day that my daughter dies not get mixed up with those losers.


There's an easy fix for this. Turn off the TV. It is not the "decider" of what goes on in your world or any world for that matter. But most importantly, you have control of what you watch, absorb, believe and focus on.

I don't have any TV service. But I do watch lots of things that I enjoy, I laugh at, I learn things about, and I get a positive perspective of the world through what I choose to focus on that way. Being that I have done this for a long time now, I see constant examples and reminders of how beautiful and strong love is in our world.


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## alexm (Nov 29, 2008)

There's a lot of angry men in this post. Whether it be about 'holidays' or feminists.

Sheesh.


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## Herschel (Mar 27, 2016)

alexm said:


> There's a lot of angry men in this post. Whether it be about 'holidays' or feminists.
> 
> Sheesh.


Agreed. And with poor grammar as well...so offensive. Sad!


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Kivlor said:


> Yeah, I've heard of it. Feminists are dumb, rabid and crazy. Not that Father's Day is important. Kind of a "meh" faux-holiday.
> 
> There's some definite irony in seeing women who are single mothers--a problem 100% their fault--decrying the dads they chose to have kids with. Maybe they should have thought about who they had sex with? Maybe promiscuity is bad? Maybe, if you knew the actual consequences of single-parenthood on children, you might not celebrate your "You go girl! You don't need no man!" ideology?
> 
> ...


Wow, that's are pretty off the wall, nasty rant.

Not all single mothers had sex with random guys and got nocked up. Not by a long shot.

One if my sisters was a single mom. She married her high school sweetheart. He started cheating on her. He beat her up and raped her one night (as she was recovering from a miscarriage earlier in the day). She got pregnant. He split. 

I know some women who were single mom's because their husband's died in Iraq, Afghanistan, etc. Some why back in Vietnam too.

And then there are the women I know how married a 'good' man after college. And then after a few kids, the guy took up with another woman. These guys never looked back.

OH yea, and then there was my MIL. Her husband went to Vietnam. She had 4 kids by him. When he got back from Vietnam he took off to Germany where he hid for years and married some German woman, having kids with her. (And no he was not a bum... he's from a family that is socially/financially right up there with the Kennedys. But MIL got no help from husband or family.)

There are many reasons that woman end up single moms.... geez


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## MrsHolland (Jun 18, 2016)

Why do people get so worked about about extremist views on any topic? Most of us are in the middle, it is just that the extremists are often the loudest. Any topic, politics, religion, men's rights groups, feminism, sport blah blah blah. 

I'm a true feminist (as in the original sense of the word, equity for all.) I also co parent in a two house hold family, have always made sure my ex is acknowledged on FD both pre and post divorce, gifts, dinner and always a hand made card from the kids even still in their late teen, early adult years.


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## Yag-Kosha (Sep 8, 2016)

MrsHolland said:


> Why do people get so worked about about extremist views on any topic?


I think it's easier for us to gravitate towards absolutes and use them to form our arguments. We as a human race don't like to think too much. That's why most of us generally hang around with those who agree with us -- forming our self-contained echo chambers.

You have to admit though, the irony is sometimes real -- https://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/womens_rights/2954711-Fathers-Day-Poster#prettyPhoto

Think of it, sitting in an air-conditioned office on an ipad, complaining about some poster you saw somewhere and still going on about some mysterious patriarchy -- without realizing you (_not referring to you MrsHolland but the poster in the link_) are in the top 1% of 1% globally. I love it.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*Fathers Day, IMHO, should be no more affront to a single mother than Mothers Day should be to a single father!*


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## Yag-Kosha (Sep 8, 2016)

Stang197 said:


> Sorry your wrong. Femism is the death of love. It's should be called selfishnism.


I am sorry but this made me laugh out loud literally. 

selfishnism

OMG. I nearly died.


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## xxxSHxYZxxx (Apr 1, 2013)

Mr. Nail said:


> Well I disagree with almost everything today, Guess I'm just in the mood. Fathers day is a totally commercialized holiday. Historically Fathers day was started to honor a Single Father. The holiday was so unpopular that it had to be saved by retailers, looking to sell men's fashions and accessories. In modern day the sales have shifted to grills and tools. Making fathers day Saturday possibly the worst day to visit a home improvement store.
> 
> Personally I believe that Fathers day has become nothing more than a guilt holiday. After being gifted at valentines, and mothers day many women seem to feel that they really should do something to make it more even by giving a man a present. While this may in fact assuage some guilt, the Men rarely feel the love because of the traditions of Fathers day. First the gifts, Tools to complete the "Honey-do" projects that he has already been nagged about. This is the rough equivalent of giving a woman a vacuum cleaner for mothers day. Grills, Traditionally Mothers day includes an elaborate Brunch to free the mother from cooking on her special day, while the man is expected to cook, adding an extra duty to his day. Ties, are in effect telling a man that he doesn't know how to dress and that wearing a little noose around his neck somehow makes him look successful, when in fact it is a sign of servitude.
> 
> ...


That's an interesting take on Father's Day. 

Waaaaaaaaaay back in the day single father's weren't necessarily uncommon. If divorced, the children would go to the father because they were able to financially support them but then pre-feminism stepped in and changed that. 

As far as the rest of what you said I don't know if I agree however my wife did get me a big tool chest the weekend before Father's Day then nagged me to organize my work bench all of Father's Day weekend. She openly admits she wants to take over the work bench for crafts even though I regularly use the work bench for home repair stuff and other DIY projects that either she of the kids mainly benefit from.

Sent from my SM-G928T using Tapatalk


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## She'sStillGotIt (Jul 30, 2016)

Wolf1974 said:


> Yesterday on fraudbook my GF showes me this rant by some conservative lady who is going on about these feminists who are saying that Father's Day is an affront to feminism and single mothers. I guess the premise is that single mothers are also dad's ??? so they should also be recognized on Father's Day?


I wonder if the raving lunatic was wearing one of those ridiculously ignorant and laughably inappropriate pink 'vagina' hats while she was having her melt down?

Sometimes my gender really embarrasses the **** out of me.


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## xxxSHxYZxxx (Apr 1, 2013)

Lol

Sent from my SM-G928T using Tapatalk


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti (Apr 23, 2017)

It seems to me there is a broad spectrum of “feminism,” and any attempt to categorize all “feminists” under a single, narrow umbrella does a disservice to rational discussion. 

There are definitely extreme feminists who are irrational man haters, hell-bent on casting anyone with a Y chromosome as pure evil, and using whatever political power, and the power of shame and guilt, to subjugate and dominate men. 
At the other extreme, there are men who think women should be barefoot and pregnant, completely subservient to their man, and don’t even have the capacity, let alone the right, to make decisions for themselves about their very own lives. 
Right smack in the middle of those two extremes, is the idea that women, like men, should have equal economic opportunity, be able to earn equal pay for equal work, have equal access to everything from promotion to public services, have equal opportunity for self determination, the pursuit of life, liberty and happiness, and be a balanced, equal partner in any relationship they may have with a man. My impression is that this is what basic feminism is all about. Thus, I see basic feminism as a very centrist position, not an extreme one. 

Sure, the extreme feminists are out there, and they, like any extremists, appear to get coverage beyond their actual numbers or influence, but I don’t let the “all sex is rape” crowd make me think they represent all feminists, or that feminism is inherently extreme. 

Quite frankly, I don’t want anything to do with a woman I can’t view as my equal. I dated a very subservient woman long term, and she was devoting her life completely to me. She was a beautiful, gentle soul, and I found her extremely attractive, but I knew that she would never change and that wouldn’t work for me as a lifetime partnership. Painful as it was, I had to end that relationship so that we could both find matches that would work for us.


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## Steve1000 (Nov 25, 2013)

Faithful Wife said:


> I had sex with my boyfriend twice and also gave him a bj on Father's Day, plus I bought him a steak and a pair of shoes.


I really hate your boyfriend! :wink2:


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

The extreme fringe of pretty much any political movement will be crazy - but that shouldn't discredit the entire movement. 

There are feminists who want to eliminate all men. There are men's rights advocates who want women to be viewed as chattel. There are religious extremists who want to bring back Livitican law or Sharia law. 

Just ignore them and look at what the mainstream is saying.


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## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

Steve1000 said:


> Faithful Wife said:
> 
> 
> > I had sex with my boyfriend twice and also gave him a bj on Father's Day, plus I bought him a steak and a pair of shoes.
> ...


I know, right? I mean the shoes were so cool!


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## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

She'sStillGotIt said:


> I wonder if the raving lunatic was wearing one of those ridiculously ignorant and laughably inappropriate pink 'vagina' hats while she was having her melt down?
> 
> Sometimes my gender really embarrasses the **** out of me.


She wasn't. She was raging against those who do though. 

It's funny you mention that though because when I said to my GF who would feel that Father's Day is somehow bad for feminism she said the women in the vagina hats lol. Guess you were both thinking the same thing


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## alexm (Nov 29, 2008)

MJJEAN said:


> I think my issue is that the parents and/ or step-parents should be getting that appreciation without being prompted by corporate advertising.
> 
> I was raised by a stepfather. Saw my bio father last when I was 4. My mom made damn sure I showed appreciation regularly. My own daughters were raised by DH after exH left state the minute the ink was dry on the D papers. You better believe I made sure they showed their appreciation regularly.
> 
> By the way, I am LMAO @ the teenage boy. I'm pretty sure every male in my and my husband's family just signs the card.


Reading this post, I have a hard time understanding why you 'liked' the following quote in this same thread:



Kivlor said:


> There's some definite irony in seeing *women who are single mothers--a problem 100% their fault*--decrying the dads they chose to have kids with. Maybe they should have thought about who they had sex with? Maybe promiscuity is bad?


As a child of such a situation, what does that say about what you think of your mother?


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

alexm said:


> Reading this post, I have a hard time understanding why you 'liked' the following quote in this same thread:
> 
> 
> 
> As a child of such a situation, what does that say about what you think of your mother?


I think my mother is human. She chose to get pregnant by a MM and raise me as a single mother. Then she met dad and things changed. 

However, the truth is, her choices had consequences and we both felt them. The years she was single were rough. Like, macaroni and cheese every night, the lights got turned off, welfare, donated clothes, rough.

I adored my mom. She loved me with everything she had and certainly cried over not being able to provide. But when you're sleeping in the living room around a space heater because it's winter and the gas got turned off, ya start to wonder about the choices your parents made that landed you there.

In short, my mom chose a ****ty father and we both paid for it.


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## chillymorn69 (Jun 27, 2016)

Rocky Mountain Yeti said:


> It seems to me there is a broad spectrum of “feminism,” and any attempt to categorize all “feminists” under a single, narrow umbrella does a disservice to rational discussion.
> 
> There are definitely extreme feminists who are irrational man haters, hell-bent on casting anyone with a Y chromosome as pure evil, and using whatever political power, and the power of shame and guilt, to subjugate and dominate men.
> At the other extreme, there are men who think women should be barefoot and pregnant, completely subservient to their man, and don’t even have the capacity, let alone the right, to make decisions for themselves about their very own lives.
> ...


could I have her number!>


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## alexm (Nov 29, 2008)

MJJEAN said:


> I think my mother is human. She chose to get pregnant by a MM and raise me as a single mother. Then she met dad and things changed.
> 
> However, the truth is, her choices had consequences and we both felt them. The years she was single were rough. Like, macaroni and cheese every night, the lights got turned off, welfare, donated clothes, rough.
> 
> ...


Right. But the post that you liked insinuated that people like your mother are *****s and getting pregnant by loser men is all on them.

I don't believe the "man" who posted that reply (who's name I will refrain from using) believes that people like your mother ARE humans. They get what they deserve, is the gist of his reply.

The problem I have with all of this, obviously, is that it's the woman who almost always has to live with the consequences of these things. Yes, the men are often derided as losers or *******s, true, but for anybody to then insinuate that the woman - who has to go through the pregnancy and then raise the child on their own - must be promiscuous?

**** that. It's an equal playing field, with unequal consequences. To put that all on the woman is disgusting, IMO.

For a woman - not just any woman, but one who was partially raised by a single woman - to agree with any of that sexist, misogynistic, half-witted drivel? I don't understand.


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

alexm said:


> Right. But the post that you liked insinuated that people like your mother are *****s and getting pregnant by loser men is all on them.
> 
> I don't believe the "man" who posted that reply (who's name I will refrain from using) believes that people like your mother ARE humans. They get what they deserve, is the gist of his reply.
> 
> ...


The biological reality is that the woman is the one who becomes pregnant and bears the burden of choosing. She chooses her sex partner, she chooses birth control usage (either she uses some kind of BC, demands the man wears a condom, or can simply decline to have sex), and she chooses whether or not she will carry to term. If she makes the wrong choice, the consequences fall primarily on her and her child(ren). Acknowledging and accepting biological reality isn't sexist or misogynistic.

Not conceiving in the first place, abortion, adoption...women have options and don't HAVE to become single mothers. If we believe that that we are all responsible for our choices and the consequences, then we must accept single mothers have chosen and any negative consequences are, in fact, on them.

Now, as to being ****s or *****s...well, that's always going to be a matter of debate. To some, having sex outside of marriage automatically qualifies one for a label like that. For others, it's fine to have as many partners as you want as long as you're practicing safer sex. Of course, there's everything in between.

Sex makes babies. No birth control is 100% (Trust me, I know. I have 2 children as the direct result of failed birth control. #1 was a Pill baby and #2 was a condom baby.) Any time a woman agrees to sex, she is risking pregnancy and all that comes with either terminating, giving for adoption, or raising that child. I think the best advice a woman can get during her years on the prowl is to take a good look at a potential sex partner and ask herself "Would I want this man to be my baby daddy should I become pregnant?" before she even kisses him. 

I've seen too many women fooling around with losers get pregnant and then act all surprised when they're single and calling around to borrow money for diapers because the loser is a loser and doesn't provide.

ETA: I realize there are single mothers who had children with decent men who help raise the child. I'm not talking about them. I'm talking about the women who ignore red flags.


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## Talker67 (Apr 7, 2016)

i can see some single mom, who has to work her but off raising kids AND making a living, being overwhelmed and lashing out at something like Father's day. She just wants SOME recognition and a pat on the back that SHE is really working hard.

But her argument is illogical. How about SINGLE DADS. Should they celebrate MOTHERS DAY? 

Let's end the pity party, raise those kids, send them off to school, and THEN you can party.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

alexm said:


> Right. But the post that you liked insinuated that people like your mother are *****s and getting pregnant by loser men is all on them.
> 
> I don't believe the "man" who posted that reply (who's name I will refrain from using) believes that people like your mother ARE humans. They get what they deserve, is the gist of his reply.
> 
> ...


I agree with your take on this.

As I said in an earlier post, there are also plenty of women who raise child on their own through no fault of their own actions. Not every single mother had an affair with a married man, or chose some loser drug addict, etc. There are a lot of different ways that women end up raising children alone.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

MJJEAN said:


> The biological reality is that the woman is the one who becomes pregnant and bears the burden of choosing. She chooses her sex partner, she chooses birth control usage (either she uses some kind of BC, demands the man wears a condom, or can simply decline to have sex), and she chooses whether or not she will carry to term. If she makes the wrong choice, the consequences fall primarily on her and her child(ren). Acknowledging and accepting biological reality isn't sexist or misogynistic.
> 
> Not conceiving in the first place, abortion, adoption...women have options and don't HAVE to become single mothers. If we believe that that we are all responsible for our choices and the consequences, then we must accept single mothers have chosen and any negative consequences are, in fact, on them.
> 
> ...


One of my sisters married before the Vietnam war. Her husband was drafted. When he came back he was a mess and just walked away. She was a single mother. According to you, he is a bad person and to be blamed.

Another once of my sisters married her high school sweetheart who she had dated for 5 years. After they married he fell in with a bad crowd and they ended up divorced. He disappeared. She had to raise their son on her own. Again according to you, this is all her fault. Shame on her.

My MIL married a man from a solid family. they both had college degrees. They were both professionals. Then he was drafted into Vietnam. When he got back from Vietnam he walked away. Shame on her I guess.

I have a friend whose husband died in a work accident. She was left to raise the children by herself. Again, shame on her.

I have a couple of other friends who married what seemed to be solid guys who they met in college. After a few kids, every one of these men walked away. They paid any child support, did not help raise the children. But again, according to you, shame on the women.

One of my maternal aunts was married to a guy who was again, a seemingly good, hardworking guy. But something happened and he became schizophrenia. When their child was 2, he committed suicide. My aunt raised her daughter all on her own as a single mother. Shame on her. She should have been able to see into the future.

I'm hoping here that you sort of forgot that not all single mothers are like your mother. That very often women do what appear to be the right things and life throws them crap. And they do their best to raise their children on their own, as a single mother. These women do not deserve the broad brush picture that is being painted of all single mother.s


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## Stang197 (Aug 31, 2015)

EleGirl said:


> MJJEAN said:
> 
> 
> > The biological reality is that the woman is the one who becomes pregnant and bears the burden of choosing. She chooses her sex partner, she chooses birth control usage (either she uses some kind of BC, demands the man wears a condom, or can simply decline to have sex), and she chooses whether or not she will carry to term. If she makes the wrong choice, the consequences fall primarily on her and her child(ren). Acknowledging and accepting biological reality isn't sexist or misogynistic.
> ...


 Not every single one. For sure. But we see, time and time again, women walk away from good men because they are not happy. They are encouraged by other women to take the kids and stick it to there husbands for the cash and prizes. I'm sorry , child support and spousal support. Time and time again women get knocked up by 2 or 3 or 4 different guys and collect welfare. 
Then feminist have the nerve to demand that father's day should be ignored. Most of the dad's I know desperately want to be with their kids. They were walked out on when the wife wanted someone new. Hosed in divorce court. Hosed on custody. And then to top it off, had their kids alienated from them.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Stang197 said:


> Not every single one. For sure. But we see, time and time again, women walk away from good men because they are not happy. They are encouraged by other women to take the kids and stick it to there husbands for the cash and prizes. I'm sorry , child support and spousal support. Time and time again women get knocked up by 2 or 3 or 4 different guys and collect welfare.


Some women walk away from good men. And some women walk away from men who are not good men. I guess you just don't believe that there are men who are not good men.

Many of the situations I talked about in my post that you are arguing against here, in every case it was the man who left the woman. IN most of the cases it was the man who had an affair, or many affairs, and then abandoned their wife and children.

My point is that not all single women are ****s/*****s who get themselves in bad situations. Some are women who are thrust into bad situations. The posters on here who are trying to paint every single mother as a woman who deserve what they get are pretty sad.



Stang197 said:


> Then feminist have the nerve to demand that father's day should be ignored. Most of the dad's I know desperately want to be with their kids. They were walked out on when the wife wanted someone new. Hosed in divorce court. Hosed on custody. And then to top it off, had their kids alienated from them.


I love your 'the feminist' . So one women who claims to be a feminist says something stupid. So what. Even if a few women agree with the stupid thing some feminist said, most women do not agree.

For example, on this thread, there is not one woman who agrees with this idea that father's day is somehow an affront to single mothers.


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

EleGirl said:


> One of my sisters married before the Vietnam war. Her husband was drafted. When he came back he was a mess and just walked away. She was a single mother. According to you, he is a bad person and to be blamed.
> 
> Another once of my sisters married her high school sweetheart who she had dated for 5 years. After they married he fell in with a bad crowd and they ended up divorced. He disappeared. She had to raise their son on her own. Again according to you, this is all her fault. Shame on her.
> 
> ...


Those were married women. Not the same thing. Perhaps the definitions needed to be clearly stated, but "single mother" is a term used where I live for women who have children outside of marriage. Your examples above would be separated, divorced, or widowed mothers.


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

...


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## Stang197 (Aug 31, 2015)

EleGirl said:


> Stang197 said:
> 
> 
> > Not every single one. For sure. But we see, time and time again, women walk away from good men because they are not happy. They are encouraged by other women to take the kids and stick it to there husbands for the cash and prizes. I'm sorry , child support and spousal support. Time and time again women get knocked up by 2 or 3 or 4 different guys and collect welfare.
> ...


This post is asking that question. The only people I have heard say that father's day is an affront to single moms IS feminist. I never said anyone here made that statement. I never said all feminist believe that. I never said all women claim to be feminist.....sheesh


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## Dannip (Jun 13, 2017)

Proves this liberalism crap is simply not sustainable. Just a bunch of unhappy whiners. It can only fail. That's the natural consequence of idiocy...

Have a great day conservatives. (Since libs can't)


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## notmyrealname4 (Apr 9, 2014)

.


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## TX-SC (Aug 25, 2015)

Dannip said:


> Proves this liberalism crap is simply not sustainable. Just a bunch of unhappy whiners. It can only fail. That's the natural consequence of idiocy...
> 
> Have a great day conservatives. (Since libs can't)


Not sure why you keep making this a "liberal versus conservative" thing. There are idiots on both sides. You have the feminists and the Red Pill men, and you have nut jobs of various types in both groups. Even as we speak, an angry mob of Alt-Right people are marching in Charlottesville, VA. I don't think anger and hatred is reduced to any party. For ever man hating ultra liberal femininist, there are three gay hating ultra conservatives. 

As for the original premise of this post, I think it's just silly to say men should not get a day of recognition for being good dads. I also don't think women should be ****-shamed for being unwed mothers. Men are just as responsible for it as women are. To say that just because they are the ones to bear the children they are MORE responsible for not getting pregnant than men is just mind-boggling and quite honestly I'm surprised at how some people here believe that.


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## Dannip (Jun 13, 2017)

Femminazis seem
Offended. That's why


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