# Kids: one week with him and one week with me.



## daisykay (Mar 17, 2010)

Does anyone do this? I am trying to decide where to live, where I am living now, just in a smaller home and he can do the same and we can split custody of the girls (they are 5 and 3) or if I should move out of the city a little and they girls stay primarily with me and with him on weekends or whenever. What are the arrangements most of you have with young kids being seperated?


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## nice777guy (Nov 23, 2009)

Wife and I are on the verge, and I've been thinking a lot myself about how this "could" work.

My own personal gut feeling is that a child should have a "primary" home. I've read some things that support my way of thinking. 

Have also read other things that say as long as the agreement is consistent and clear, the kids know what to expect, and both parents have reasonably equal living arrangements, that a 50/50, every other week, type split can work.

I just know that "I" wouldn't want to have to have half my stuff here, half there, and keep a bag packed with my really "important" stuff for those transition times. I would rather pack an overnight or weekend bag once a week.

That's just my opinion.


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## TNgirl232 (Oct 5, 2008)

My daughter goes to her dad's 1 night a week and every other weekend. and up to 2 full weeks during the summer.


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## BuddyL33 (Jul 16, 2009)

Wife and I are on the verge as well but we've talked it all out. She's a nurse and has to work 2-3 nights a week to make ends meet. 

So the custody of our son will be based around her schedule 6 weeks at a time. I will have him from noon on the nights she works, til 5pm the day she gets off.

For instace if she works 7p-7am on a Tuesday, I would have him from Noon on Tuesday til 5pm on Wednesday.

Ideally I'd like to see her work 3 nights in a row. Then I would get him from like Noon on a Tues til like 5pm on that Friday. It's as close to 50/50 as she's willing to give and I don't want to put my son in the middle of a custody dispute.


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## Robrobb (Jun 18, 2010)

I think we're headed there too. She's said she'd prefer to stay together in the same house as a not-couple. Maybe even remain married indefinitely. This would really, really not work for me. If she carries on with moving out, I expect to stay on in our house with the kids for a short while. If there's a divorce, the house will almost certainly have to be sold and we'd find alternate housing.

So far we're both thinking of sharing the parenting load, but haven't found a way to define how. For sure we plan to remain in the same town to keep us both available to the kids all the time.

Long term this will probably not hold. I forsee in the short term, each of us having a certain amount of access to the other's home for parenting purposes. If new relationships develop, even new marriages, that would end or at least change vastly. It may become necessary for one of us to move out of town. Or, we might become combative and fall into a big custody fight.


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## WTSM (Aug 27, 2011)

We are going to do a week on week off. But I am just trying to get her to see that my week is my week.


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