# Making up for broken promises



## sillyk (Mar 26, 2012)




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## endlessgrief (Feb 19, 2012)

Hmmm, a woman who laughs at romantic gestures. What woman doesn't like chocolate? Yeah, flowers are too cliche and a teddy bear doesn't sound like it would be up your wife's alley either.

Get her a plastic pile of dog poop with a pink bow in it. :smthumbup:

Make her laugh, do something anti-romantic and make fun of it. Tickle her funny bone and she make tickle yours


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## CLucas976 (Jun 27, 2010)

The thing lacking here is that depending on your deeds, a gift isn't going to make up for the hurt.

it might make her smile, but real actions speak louder than flowers. (even if some of us as cliche as it is LOVE getting flowers)

express your regret for hurting her and for the action itself, don't repeat it and proceed from there. Otherwise, it's just "well I ****ed up, here's a gift"


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## Mavash. (Jan 26, 2012)

You can't buy your way out of "selfish, unthoughtful deeds".

Seek counseling either individually and/or together to learn how to work through this.

Also it takes time for wounds to heal. So you can't just magically 'stop' her from hurting. That's on her timeline not yours.


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## heavensangel (Feb 12, 2012)

Mavash. said:


> You can't buy your way out of "selfish, unthoughtful deeds".
> 
> Seek counseling either individually and/or together to learn how to work through this.
> 
> Also it takes time for wounds to heal. So you can't just magically 'stop' her from hurting. That's on her timeline not yours.


Kind of hard to determine what you should do without knowing what the 'crime' was. but here it goes.........

Mavash is right!!!! The best 'gift' you can give your wife is REAL HONEST remorse: this is accomplished #1 by you putting an immediate stop on your 'selfish, thoughtless deeds' #2 Being honest & open when/if she questions you on anything to do with or similar to 'your selfish, thoughtless deeds' #3 Understand that 'time' & 'understanding' are what she needs most to heal. 

You may not want to hear this but depending on what your selfish deeds were, she may never totally heal from it. It could be somewhat of a life sentence for you. But tough to say without details.


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## Coffee Amore (Dec 15, 2011)

It's difficult to answer this question in an information vacuum. You need to tell us exactly what the deeds are.

Are we talking "unthoughtful" as in forgetting her birthday or are you talking about something more serious? If my husband did something that was egregious then tried to bring me flowers or chocolates or tried to joke his way out of it, it wouldn't go over well. 

If you've really made a mess of things, don't minimize it. A heartfelt apology sincerely given, remorse and a promise not to do it again is better than trying to buy my forgiveness with flowers or chocolates.

Again, I'm curious as to what exactly you did. Hopefully you come back to expand on your original post.


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## sillyk (Mar 26, 2012)




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