# People Don't Even Have The Slightest Clue



## Guest (Oct 24, 2008)

*In Other Words, You're Interviewing Musicians For The Position Of Brain Surgeon. . . .*


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## Amplexor (Feb 13, 2008)

I’m not sure what to read into this post other than cynical. :scratchhead:


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## dcrim (Oct 1, 2008)

I agree with it! 

People get married to have sex. Period. Then they divorce. End of story. Next chapter...get married for sex again. Don't understand the concept? Look at Hollywood.  

If you want to fu.k, then just do it. If you want a lifetime partner, then stick with them. Teach them how to enjoy sex, if you have to.


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## Dancing Nancie (Jul 1, 2008)

I couldn't disagree with this anymore. I had sex a lot more often before I was married!


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## justean (May 28, 2008)

when i first married , it was for a controlling father, certainly not for sex.
wish i hadnt done the sex bit either. it was rubbish. 
oh whats its like to be older and wiser.


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## martino (May 12, 2008)

Don't go comparing a brain surgeon to a musician!! :smthumbup:


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## bhappy3 (Feb 4, 2008)

Well now that's a different post. 

I didn't get married to have sex, had plenty of it before I was married, and much more fulfilling. I got married b/c the person is great with finances, is a good dad, used to listen to me, has a great work ethic, and faithful til death. 

And now here we are not getting along because his lack of interest in sex. Go figure. Got it all (almost), but not enough. =)


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## Ashley (Oct 21, 2008)

dcrim said:


> I agree with it!
> 
> People get married to have sex. Period. Then they divorce. End of story. Next chapter...get married for sex again. Don't understand the concept? Look at Hollywood.
> 
> If you want to fu.k, then just do it. If you want a lifetime partner, then stick with them. Teach them how to enjoy sex, if you have to.



I totaly agree with that statement. Its not like that up here, but in the USA most of the people marry to get sex legaly, or make their pregnancy legal even if they are not at all made for one another..
There is so many prejudices in that area that most are not having sex or feel bad about it if they are not married first.

Thats a social nightmare
guys cant wait and it goes all wrong.
Oh of course some people had sex before they were married and do not follow being married first, as a condition for having sex, but all the other religious ones does and they are the majority, so lots of couples married for sex only and that explain why the US is the country in the world where sex is the most central tema in couples crisis, and problems between husband and wife.
They dont have that in that degree in the rest of the world..
I also read here a couple whos man dont have get sex for 15 years agaisnt his will! LOLOL! Nobody in the world will accept that.
If he married in the catholic church or any christian church he can get his wife to the priest and she will be told that its her duty as a wife to give sex to him, as it is the duty of the man to give some.. ;D
Not marrying for sex should be the main thing and the average.


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## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

bhappy3 said:


> I didn't get married to have sex, had plenty of it before I was married, and much more fulfilling. I got married b/c the person is great with finances, is a good dad, used to listen to me, has a great work ethic, and faithful til death.
> 
> And now here we are not getting along because his lack of interest in sex. Go figure. Got it all (almost), but not enough. =)


LOL. Me too. The one problem i never thought id have...


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## justean (May 28, 2008)

Ashley said:


> I totaly agree with that statement. Its not like that up here, but in the USA most of the people marry to get sex legaly, or make their pregnancy legal even if they are not at all made for one another..
> There is so many prejudices in that area that most are not having sex or feel bad about it if they are not married first.
> QUOTE]
> 
> ...


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## *Aceso* (Oct 25, 2008)

I think that people get married for all the wrong reasons and sex isn't one of them. 
Women get married because they want a wedding and "happily ever after". Wedding leaves you with a big debt and once there is a big debt there is no happily ever after. 

Men, being totally realistic and not into all that romantic stuff get married so they don't have to do their own cooking, washing and so on.


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## dcrim (Oct 1, 2008)

Well, I wish I'd thought of that!  




*Aceso* said:


> Men...get married so they don't have to do their own cooking, washing and so on.


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## justean (May 28, 2008)

*Aceso* said:


> I think that people get married for all the wrong reasons and sex isn't one of them.
> Women get married because they want a wedding and "happily ever after". Wedding leaves you with a big debt and once there is a big debt there is no happily ever after.
> 
> Men, being totally realistic and not into all that romantic stuff get married so they don't have to do their own cooking, washing and so on.


:iagree:


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## Ashley (Oct 21, 2008)

justean said:


> Ashley said:
> 
> 
> > I totaly agree with that statement. Its not like that up here, but in the USA most of the people marry to get sex legaly, or make their pregnancy legal even if they are not at all made for one another..
> ...


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## Ashley (Oct 21, 2008)

LOL to Aseco and Dcrim! :rofl:

"Always look on the bright side of life".. :smthumbup:


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## justean (May 28, 2008)

your right its very scary, even scarier having your own children coming to the age when i was being stupid myself. 
well im stil stupid now, but atleast im in a postition to look after myself.


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## *Aceso* (Oct 25, 2008)

Ashley said:


> LOL to Aseco and Dcrim! :rofl:
> 
> "Always look on the bright side of life".. :smthumbup:


I'm just having one of those days. Usually I'm a "glass half full" kind a girl.  Hell, I still believe that my husband will change. How is that for being optimistic about life?


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## Ashley (Oct 21, 2008)

*Aceso* said:


> I'm just having one of those days. Usually I'm a "glass half full" kind a girl.  Hell, I still believe that my husband will change. How is that for being optimistic about life?


LOL! He will baby! Just not in this life time! LOL!

We all go in decomposition one day, thats a change! :lol:

:rofl:


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## Ashley (Oct 21, 2008)

justean said:


> your right its very scary, even scarier having your own children coming to the age when i was being stupid myself.
> well im stil stupid now, but atleast im in a postition to look after myself.



I hear you justean.


i am glad to sea someone admitting its not wise, and not hearing all those doing like if its alright.
like Oh its a new baby and baby are so sweet, yeah, say that to the grand mother and father, getting grand ma a bit too early, and to the mum when she will be old enough to think " Oh God, but what was I thinking? I want my life and my youth back!"

I imagine you must flip out sometimes.. i noticed that most women who get prego as teen, got their own daughter doing the same after them.  not good..
and then, they cant say a word.. cause the teen will go "and what about you?! you did the same so i can too" aw.. 

By chance you are not of that category, but nowaday it must be scary when your teen got a sweetie, and you know it can goes wrong and how easy it can happen..

But i think that with the way you are thinking and oyur mentality, you are very good to advise them better and that they are not in danger.


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## draconis (Oct 3, 2007)

Ashley said:


> I totaly agree with that statement. Its not like that up here, but in the USA most of the people marry to get sex legaly, or make their pregnancy legal even if they are not at all made for one another..
> There is so many prejudices in that area that most are not having sex or feel bad about it if they are not married first.
> 
> Thats a social nightmare
> ...



If you think people in america have to marry to have sex think again. If you think it is for approval of sex think again. Most people get married because they "think" they found there soul mate. Most are to young and still changing through their lives. Most do not understand that all the things you do before being married you need to do afterwards too.

draconis


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## *Aceso* (Oct 25, 2008)

Ashley said:


> We all go in decomposition one day, thats a change! :lol:
> 
> :rofl:


Never thought of that one. Well, I better stop telling him to eat healthier then and feed him all the junk food in the world. He might "change" sooner. :smthumbup:


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## justean (May 28, 2008)

Ashley said:


> But i think that with the way you are thinking and oyur mentality, you are very good to advise them better and that they are not in danger.


dont get me wrong i had my stupid head on in those years. i told my mum when i was 18, i was going to have a baby - just to rebel. lucky it never happened. 
i think i grew up in a place when like in the olden days , you get married asap and then you have kids asap and as someone said you think your going to live happily ever after. 
but this isnt real thinking. 
i think when i grew up, i watched the disney films or read similar books. as kids they always ended with a happy ending.
so we had brain training as kids to have this expectancy of a similar happy ending. 
but when it came to my own real life, it wasnt so much a happy ending. i realise you have to understand life and what it can do and what it can bring. 
ARE THERE ANY REAL PRINCE CHARMINGS OUT THERE?


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## dcrim (Oct 1, 2008)

I've heard it said that women marry hoping he'll change; men marry hoping she won't. Both are usually disappointed.  




*Aceso* said:


> I'm just having one of those days. Usually I'm a "glass half full" kind a girl.  Hell, I still believe that my husband will change. How is that for being optimistic about life?


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## *Aceso* (Oct 25, 2008)

> I've heard it said that women marry hoping he'll change; men marry hoping she won't. Both are usually disappointed.


:lol: That's funny but not true in my case. My husband was the best man I have ever met but then he changed. I'd give everything in this world to have my "old" husband back.


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## justean (May 28, 2008)

dcrim said:


> I've heard it said that women marry hoping he'll change; men marry hoping she won't. Both are usually disappointed.


nice saying - but no that didnt apply to me.


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## Ashley (Oct 21, 2008)

justean said:


> dont get me wrong i had my stupid head on in those years. i told my mum when i was 18, i was going to have a baby - just to rebel. lucky it never happened.
> i think i grew up in a place when like in the olden days , you get married asap and then you have kids asap and as someone said you think your going to live happily ever after.
> but this isnt real thinking.
> i think when i grew up, i watched the disney films or read similar books. as kids they always ended with a happy ending.
> ...


I never had that kind of expectation, and maybe in Europe they are more grounded and know what to expect and what not to expect and are some how more grounded and hwat you see is what you get, like. And not in any hurry to marry exactly because htey know that you have to be sure and that marriage is too serious to jsut jump in it like that.
They are more cautious than in the USA and in England.
There is prince charming out there, at elast the one made for you, but its not the one you jump with first and its not always what one thought it could be.. some people are livign with their prince charmign but simply dont see him or her like that.. and thats sad.
A soul mate is difficult to found and most people just chose second best to can settle down more fast and dont have to wait and be uncertain so long. Its also alrgith if they can live like that and be happy that way.


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## Ashley (Oct 21, 2008)

dcrim said:


> I've heard it said that women marry hoping he'll change; men marry hoping she won't. Both are usually disappointed.


:lol: very good one dcrim! :rofl:


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## justean (May 28, 2008)

got to admit ashley - i like what you say.


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## Ashley (Oct 21, 2008)

Thank you justean. The reason why we dont see our prins charming or princesse, even when we are living with her or him, is that we are not developed enough ourself to can meet him.. meaning see him.. we dont have reached that stage yet.
You can have crossed him earlier and never noticed him, but the day you are ready inside, the day you have developed so much that now you are free from past and family luggages, and are truly yourself with all your potentials activated, then you meet him just like that, sure and certain.
And for him it got to be the same, or he will be at the same level than you are, meaning that you will both have to develop further, together, before attaining that state where you will both be perfect for each others.. the prince charming.. we are not born that way, we become it by becoming ourself fully.
So you could be married to him, but you are both a bit imperfect.. Thats life, but nothing is made in stone, we can always better ourself, and making mistakes to grow is a not just a human priviledge, but the priviledge of a learning and growing life. 

And the same can be said about love, as love is the essence of life.


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## justean (May 28, 2008)

thanks ashley, then i gonna admit it, my hubby is my prince charming. weve been through alot, and your response meant alot.


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## Ashley (Oct 21, 2008)

Thanks too Justean, I am glad to hear that.
Then all is cool for you  whats can be better than knowing that you are married to your prince charming, huh!? 
You are lucky indeed.  :smthumbup:


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## justean (May 28, 2008)

well sometimes you need other ppls knowledge and advice to help you realise alot in life.
we forget ourselves in relationships and take alot for granted. 
it could take just one person that brings you back to thinking straight and realise whats i front of you and it doesnt have to be your partner. thanks ashley.


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## Ashley (Oct 21, 2008)

Thanks to you too justean 
we all need input and feedback from outside, I know it for myself. What you say is true, sometimes we are so much into the every days maze that we even forget ourself.
Its good to remember that things are not just alright, but that in fact they are good. 
You got a house, beautifull kids, a husband that loves you, a horse you can ride when you want to, cruises to have fun and make sweet memories, all kind of things to help you forget the past and feel good about yourself.
We all made our msitakes in the past, but we surely should also appreciate our numerous blessings and dont let the stain, take the shirts place by letting it take too much place. i went through similar experiences so i know what your talking about first place..  
Dont look at it with a telescope, or a microscope, give it back its place, put it back in a corner, see it from a distance, and think "well i managed very well since, and were is this arse now huh?!" :rofl: lol and give yourself a pat on the back.
Today you go on cruise and you build a real family with love and real values. Oh hubby made a right swing.. ehem.. but you put him back on track, he made his mistakes too..Not the end of the world and not the end of your marriage and certainly not the end of your happyness together.
Kick away all those trash from the past, and dont look back Justean.
Who needs chains to can fly? So dont lock yourself.
You cant forget everything, but you can always have it in a way that it doesnt touch you emotionaly and therefor can never hurt you again.
And isnt it sweet to see hubby all red in the face and eyes down like a 5 years old who dirty his brand new shorts?


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