# Advice on how to handle this?



## SebaM (Sep 22, 2011)

I need advice on how to handle this.

I have been with my wife for over 3 years now, married for almost 1. We have no kids. I've known about her GAD (General Anxiety Disorder) since before we started dating, which she takes medication for, and I've done a good job at trying to keep her level headed. When we got engaged, she made me promise her that if she ever got to the point where she mentally wasn't the woman I married anymore and I couldn't bring her back, that I would leave her and take any kids we may have at the time with me. I reluctantly agreed after repeating several times that I doubt it'd get that bad. Since we have gotten married, she has shown a very gradual, but consistent change in attitude and personality. She picks fights with me on a nearly daily basis over the stupidest things, often having nothing to do with me. Then she'll calm down and apologize for being so grumpy and that she doesn't mean it, but the next day she'll do it again, using the same excuse and apology almost word for word. For an example, this happened this morning:

Her: I can't find my house keys! Where the hell are my house keys!?
Me: I don't know.
Her: Well that's helpful. You don't have to be such an ass about it.

Sometimes she'll want to have sex, but often it'll be not long after having an argument that day that I still feel raw about it, so I'll tell her I'm not in the mood. She also likes to lick my face out of nowhere. I've been telling her for like 2 years to not do it because I hate it, and she'll stop until the next day. The romance is gone. We rarely ever go on dates anymore. Anytime I suggest something to do or something interesting to make for dinner, she's always shooting it down.

I'm afraid it's reaching the point where I may have to do what she made me promise to do and leave her. We both want kids, but I don't want to have kids with her if I think we're going to divorce so early on in the child's life. It's not fair to the child. We have a cruise we're going on in January with my family, and I don't want to make any final decisions until after that, because I don't want to ruin anyone's fun or make things awkward. I also don't know how to talk to her about it. I've tried telling her several times that she's being oppressive, but she just gets offended and starts pointing fingers at me.

I'm not happy anymore. I'm downright miserable. It's suffocating. Does anyone have any advice on how to approach/handle this?


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## SebaM (Sep 22, 2011)

I don't know if divorce is the answer, but things aren't working. How different is separating vs divorcing on a relationship?


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