# Husband is having an Emtional Affair



## gutcheck1973 (Sep 18, 2014)

In June my world crashed, I found out my husband has been seeing another woman and spending all of his time with her, taking away from me and our three kids. I want to try to save our marriage and work things out, he doesn't know if he wants to stay married and keep trying. He says he is not trying to choose between me and the other woman but it feels that way. I have been nothing but nice but now I am wondering if we should get separated or just get divorced. I have lost him emotionally and I don't know how to get that back.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

Go read in the infidelity forum. Your first task is to break up the affair, if you want to fix your marriage. 

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## firebelly1 (Jul 9, 2013)

Marriage counselling if he's still interested in saving the marriage. And you need to make him choose. If he's interested in saving the marriage, he has to cut off contact with her. If he's not, it may be too late. Sorry.


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## Idyit (Mar 5, 2013)

It is not an emotional affair. If he is spending time with her alone they are not just emotionally connecting. Most likely they have been physically intimate. He has chosen to break his vows with you, betraying your children as well.

Your response has been to be nice. He did not respect you when initiating and continuing his affair. Now his respect has further dropped because you are not respecting yourself. You are at best plan B to him. Are you mad yet? You should be!

This will not just go away, do not sweep anything under the rug. First, look up the 180 and implement immediately. Next or simultaneously, expose the affair to the spouse of PSOW (piece of $hYt other woman) and any of your family/friends that you feel should know. This exposure will: make them re-think their behavior, not allow a re-writing of history, potentially halt the affair and put you in control. 

Another important early action is to go see a lawyer to know what your rights are and what you're up against. Then file for divorce. Now you are firmly in control of the situation and have taken back dignity for yourself. You have decided how this will proceed, disallowing his wavering between you and the other woman.

Right now though, I would ask a moderator to move this thread to the coping with infidelity section. There are a lot of folks there that have been through what you are experiencing. They have a wealth of knowledge and experience that will help you.

~ Passio


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## 3Xnocharm (Jun 22, 2012)

gutcheck1973 said:


> In June my world crashed, I found out my husband has been seeing another woman and spending all of his time with her, taking away from me and our three kids. I want to try to save our marriage and work things out, he doesn't know if he wants to stay married and keep trying. He says he is not trying to choose between me and the other woman but it feels that way. I have been nothing but nice but now I am wondering if we should get separated or just get divorced. I have lost him emotionally and I don't know how to get that back.


Wait...HE doesnt know what he wants?? Then YOU decide for him and kick his cheating ass to the curb. Stop being his doormat!


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