# I am happy because...



## personofinterest

Disclaimer: I have not yet been married to my husband for eons, so maybe I am not qualified to post this in LONG term success. But all the other topics are problem-focused.

I get depressed and stressed reading nothing but problems, so I thought I would start a thread where we could be gross and obnoxious. I'll start since I am apparently a pro at being obnoxious (I added it to my resume yesterday) 

I am in the last half of my life, and I still can't believe sometimes that after I thought it was too late I found someone like my husband. I really don't deserve him, but he is more than I could ever have dreamed. It is hard to describe what it is like to be this happy; I mean, my view of what happy would look like was so skewed and lowered....it's almost surreal being in this marriage. I'm so so thankful.

Who's next?


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## NobodySpecial

Yay! I am glad for you!


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## OnTheFly

Not happy, but content. Small, but important difference. Kinda like the way 'love' is understood in modern lingo, and how the Bible defines 'love'.


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## kag123

I think to myself at least once a day how fortunate I am to have found my husband. I feel incredibly lucky to have found such a caring and loving person. I tell anyone who will listen that I have no idea how or why he puts up with me, but that I'm damn lucky he does. Particularly when I hear others talking about their relationship problems. 

Sent from my SM-N950U using Tapatalk


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## personofinterest

OnTheFly said:


> Not happy, but content. Small, but important difference. Kinda like the way 'love' is understood in modern lingo, and how the Bible defines 'love'.


This is a very good point. I am also content. But I confess, after the previous marriage of loneliness, self-hate, and misery, I am going to bask in the emotion of happiness for awhile


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## 269370

I am very happy too! 

Until the nagging starts...

No, we 'rediscovered' our marriage several times during our being together (20 odd years or so, since 16). It's never static though and the thing is, once you stop and say to yourself: "ah, this is the moment worth living for!", then that's usually when some **** is about to happen.
It's life.


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## OnTheFly

personofinterest said:


> This is a very good point. I am also content. But I confess, after the previous marriage of loneliness, self-hate, and misery, I am going to bask in the emotion of happiness for awhile


As you should!

I guess I viewed your post through OnTheFly's tinted glasses. When I hear ''happiness'' used, I often think of something akin to an idol that people chase after, like money. When is enough, enough, constantly chasing and never knowing when you've arrived. In your case, it seems to have come about unexpectedly, almost undeservedly (kinda how grace is defined Biblically as 'underserved merit'). Don't think I'm diminishing it, it warms my heart when people are truly blessed in a relationship. 

I'm feeling soft today, must be the residual buzz from my bullet proof coffee and 1/2lb of bacon breakfast I just had.


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## personofinterest

OnTheFly said:


> As you should!
> 
> I guess I viewed your post through OnTheFly's tinted glasses. When I hear ''happiness'' used, I often think of something akin to an idol that people chase after, like money. When is enough, enough, constantly chasing and never knowing when you've arrived. In your case, it seems to have come about unexpectedly, almost undeservedly (kinda how grace is defined Biblically as 'underserved merit'). Don't think I'm diminishing it, it warms my heart when people are truly blessed in a relationship.
> 
> I'm feeling soft today, must be the residual buzz from my bullet proof coffee and 1/2lb of bacon breakfast I just had.


Also a good point. I believe the ONLY reason I was ready for my hubby was because I had "learned to be content" (Philippians 4:11). To get even more churchy, I believe that one of the things that will be critical to our continued "Happiness" will be our continued contentment being found in Christ and not making each other the idol, so to speak.

Doesn't mean I don't kinda worship him in the wifely sense lol


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## brooklynAnn

I have been blessed with great kids and a wonderful husband. Its been 26 years now for us. I am very contend with my life.

The sun is shining and the gloom of winter is gone. Summer makes me so happy.🌻


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## OnTheFly

brooklynAnn said:


> I have been blessed with great kids and a wonderful husband. Its been 26 years now for us. I am very contend with my life.
> 
> The sun is shining and the gloom of winter is gone. Summer makes me so happy.🌻


lol, on April 1, my wife stops wearing socks, cuz "socks are winter clothes" and she says it's now spring. Sometimes it hastens the good weather, sometimes winter in S. Ontario isn't over…..she grins and bears it until the nice weather eventually comes.


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## happyhusband0005

I am happy because if I could choose to be any person on earth I would choose to be me.


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## Keke24

Not married yet but I'm also happy to be in the relationship I am. Happy that it has forced me to be introspective and increased my capacity to accept that sometimes I'm wrong. It's helped me deal with conflict in a lot of other relationships.

I'm happiest of all to live on an island and to be a part of this beautiful nature. I woke up, picked a mango off the tree in our backyard and savored it right there, the sweet orange juice dripping off my chin. Mmmm. The simplicity and satisfaction in that "trivial" experience is so incredibly overwhelming and humbling.


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## Andy1001

happyhusband0005 said:


> I am happy because if I could choose to be any person on earth I would choose to be me.


It’s just as well because everyone else is taken.


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## happyhusband0005

Andy1001 said:


> It’s just as well because everyone else is taken.


Uuuuhhh have you seen the Kardashians there is definitely no one currently occupying them.


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## heartsbeating

I was interviewed recently (not for a job) and one of the questions was 'When were you at your happiest?' 

My mind quickly flicked through many joyous times ...but I replied that it's pretty much every day. Particularly recently, I feel a deep sense of gratitude for having my husband in my life, for the life we share, and our home together.


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## Ikaika

I am happy because I know that my wife is likely the only person who can put up with me. 

Or you can just read our journey under my original username

Mr. and Mrs. Drerio's Journey
https://r.tapatalk.com/shareLink?sh...age.com/showthread.php?p=2044057&share_type=t


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk Pro


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## SimplyAmorous

Ikaika said:


> I am happy because I know that my wife is likely the only person who can put up with me.


 I think this way about my husband also...I am likely not the easiest woman to be married to...in many ways... YES (sex, being responsible, carrying my weight)... in others... NO... there are just certain things I want, EXPECT to be a part of married life/ family life that I've always envisioned/ longed for in a life partner... If these lacked or went by the wayside.... I just wouldn't be a happy camper... 

I have never felt this way, there has always been this internal thing, memories replaying / special moments reminding me of what we share together.... from the time we met, he just "GETS ME"....we shared the same vision somehow....crazily he feels the same about my relationship "deal breakers"...as these same things would frustrate him if they were lacking, he'd likely recoil...

Also he can handle my bad moments with grace, even laugh about it, making fun of me... something that has always endeared me to him...

When it comes down to it.. I've never had to beg or barter for any "Emotional needs" to be met, these flow from him freely..... There have been some "wants" he's struggled to fulfill... but never "needs"... and that's an important distinction in our level of happiness, so I believe.


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## NJ2

OnTheFly said:


> lol, on April 1, my wife stops wearing socks, cuz "socks are winter clothes" and she says it's now spring. Sometimes it hastens the good weather, sometimes winter in S. Ontario isn't over…..she grins and bears it until the nice weather eventually comes.


I love your wife....."open toes until it snows!" Sometimes my toes darn near get frost bite but I dont care!


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## NJ2

I am happy because after buying 5 chickens to try and raise I found a different breed I also wanted ( hard to find locally) and H drove me an hour there and back to buy them. He smiled and shook his head when I ended up getting 4 instead of 2 cuz they were so darn cute....

Marriage is full of many opportunities to make each other happy. Intimacy is trying to take those opportunities when they present themselves. Contentment is when you are both doing this for each other on a fairly regular basis.


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## Parrot_head

Im happy now because the nagging has subsided ..
My tinnitus is in both ears now

J/K


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## Parrot_head

OnTheFly said:


> lol, on April 1, my wife stops wearing socks, cuz "socks are winter clothes" and she says it's now spring. Sometimes it hastens the good weather, sometimes winter in S. Ontario isn't over…..she grins and bears it until the nice weather eventually comes.


We too are in deep south ontario lol

Wife never has socks on either


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## Rob_1

I'm happy because I found the sweetest, loyal, decent human being that I could ever ask for those decades ago, and still I feel her love.

A lot of times I say to myself: what a lucky bastard I am. After having been a such a uncompromising player with women during a lot of my life. I got her. Luckily for me, I have a good friend that made me see the stupidity of my ways at the time when he told me: Rob...what the **** is wrong with you, she's one of a kind in this life. 

Let me tell you now: HE WAS ****ING RIGH. Ed and I still occasionally, reminiscent about that conversation. I LOVE YOU CANDY.


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## PigglyWiggly

I got a text this morning from my wife at 8am "I love you beautiful man." nuff said


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## Ab10lah

I am happy because I chose to be. Happiness is being alive, healthy and having a loving family.


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## Mr.Married

20 plus years together...as happy as ever. We "date" more now than when we were young and have learned how to please each other in all the best of ways. Investing in our marriage
and kids has been a great experience.


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## TheDudeLebowski

I'm happy I stole this hot Asian girl away from her then boyfriend way back in high school. I'm also happy we went official on 3/21/00. 32100 the easiest date to remember for a dumb guy like me. I'm happy she puts up with my less than serious attitude towards life. Well, she is a bit of a worried person. Plans everything. Worries a bunch about this or that. I'm so much the opposite that I would probably be in a bad way if I were with someone like myself. We balance each other out in this regard. I'm happy she's a wonderful mother, and a very caring person. I'm beyond thankfully and happy she puts up with me, and understands my sometimes very dark sense of humor. She just shakes her head or says "awe, that's mean!" But then has a half smile on her face. Which is about as much as I can ask for with some of the **** I say. 

Not to mention she's hot as hell. Like smoking hot. We jive in the sack. I like what she likes and she likes what I like. 

More than anything, I'm happy I got so lucky to find her so young. Its been a crazy ride. I'm more happy than anything that ive had someone to share my life with for so long. She jumped on the rollercoaster with me all those years ago. She has never asked for the ride to end, or even wanted it to stop for just a moment. We've simply held on to each other during the scary times. During the downs, the ups, the boring times, the amazing times, the depressed times, the tough times. She has held my hand through the whole ride. I can't imagine a scenario where we aren't still holding hands, side by side on this ride, together through this life the end of our days. 

She is my everything.


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## Diana7

personofinterest said:


> Also a good point. I believe the ONLY reason I was ready for my hubby was because I had "learned to be content" (Philippians 4:11). To get even more churchy, I believe that one of the things that will be critical to our continued "Happiness" will be our continued contentment being found in Christ and not making each other the idol, so to speak.
> 
> Doesn't mean I don't kinda worship him in the wifely sense lol


God can do a lot of loving and healing through our spouse. We met and married in our late 40's and both had lots of previous hurts and baggage. 13 years later we have blossomed under that love.


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## arbitrator

Andy1001 said:


> *It’s just as well because everyone else is taken.*


*... except Ol' Arb! But that's undoubtedly his own fault!

Seriously, despite not being in a relationship and often afraid and rather fearful to even embark upon another one, I am happy in that I have two wonderfully educated sons, and friends. Don't have a plethora of money but I've got my health, and more importantly the love of the Heavenly Father and the salvation He offers instilled well within my being!

I trust that if He wants me to be in another one, He will truly guide and direct me in finding love once again. If it ever happens, then that's great!

If not, then I'm still blessed beyond measure!

*


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## TheDudeLebowski

arbitrator said:


> *... except Ol' Arb! But that's undoubtedly his own fault!
> 
> Seriously, despite not being in a relationship and often afraid and rather fearful to even embark upon another one, I am happy in that I have two wonderfully educated sons, and friends. Don't have a plethora of money but I've got my health, and more importantly the love of the Heavenly Father and the salvation He offers instilled well within my being!
> 
> I trust that if He wants me to be in another one, He will truly guide and direct me in finding love once again. If it ever happens, then that's great!
> 
> If not, then I'm still blessed beyond measure!
> 
> *



But He helps those who help themselves. If you want something Arb, you will be the one who as to do all the work. I don't think using Him as a crutch is His way. Free will means you will make that decision for yourself at some point. His guidance is only there help you make the correct choices when you reach a crossroad. Not to steer you in any general direction. So your trust is misplaced I believe in this regard. If I had to venture a guess, you mistrust yourself too much in this area that you want to seemingly take that decision out of your own hands and place it in His hands. I don't think He would want you to do that. He would want you to trust yourself again, and to live your life for yourself.


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## arbitrator

*Although it's a well rehearsed sermon topic of many Christian pastors, there is no written Biblical scripture that says that "God only helps those who help themselves."

I firmly believe that God often helps those who exercise faith and honor in Him and to those who humbly come to Him in prayer!

But even then, it is no mystery that some of God's greatest blessings are "unanswered prayers!" And that might well be the case with me, as He might realize that I could not survive another tragic marital hit in life!*


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## TheDudeLebowski

It may not be written, I think it is implied in the concept of free will. 

Prayer can get you so only so far. I don't ever think it was meant to be asking for something. Or requesting things to go one way or another for you. I think it was His way of trying to have a relationship with you, and that is all. For you to speak to Him, question Him, Thank him for all the wonderful things life has to offer everyone. 

Your choices are all yours. The results that come about in all those choices each one of us makes isn't His doing. Rather, it is simply a result of our own free will as humans. His guidance is there to help us in times of need to make good decisions for ourselves. Beyond that, I don't think He answers prayers, or doesn't answer prayers. That would be in direct conflict with the idea of free will. 

So no, I dont subscribe to the idea of answered and unanswered prayer as His doing. If you want something, you just have to go for it. Stick your neck out. He is there for you, not to protect you from harm, but to act as a beacon if you lose your way through your own choices, and others choices that may impact you. 

Someone without your own convictions Arb might have crumbled already from what man's free will has lead to for you. THAT is what His guidance is for. To keep you from rolling over and giving up. Not to answer prayers, or make sure prayers go unanswered to protect you.


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## john117

I'm happy I raised two wonderful girls, accomplished so much career wise, had a decent marriage for 25 years, and now I'm REALLY happy we separated cleanly and I can now spend Sunday in bed playing Angry Birds 2 without anyone telling me what needs to be done.


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## personofinterest

There are some wonderful circumstances in my life that contribute to my happiness. However, this afternoon I know my happiness resides in the certainty of what I know to be true regardless of other opinions, conjectures, or even disagreement. It has nothing to do with me being right. It is me being blessed and at absolute peace with what I know in a deeper way than I know that my heart is beating or 4 quarters equal daughter. It is MORE than tangible


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## TheDudeLebowski

personofinterest said:


> There are some wonderful circumstances in my life that contribute to my happiness. However, this afternoon I know my happiness resides in the certainty of what I know to be true regardless of other opinions, conjectures, or even disagreement. It has nothing to do with me being right. It is me being blessed and at absolute peace with what I know in a deeper way than I know that my heart is beating or 4 quarters equal daughter. It is MORE than tangible


Well said. There is something good about knowing what you believe to be true for yourself. Even if others disagree, or try to define your own truths for you. That is called knowing yourself, and accepting and loving yourself for who you are. There is a lot of happiness in this space.


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## Adel

even though we are officially married not so long ago, we have known each other for over 10 years. And I'm happy I have my close and dear person with whom I can share all my experiences! Every time something gnaws at me, I just have to share it with my husband, or even just hug him! It makes me so much easier!


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## BluesPower

personofinterest said:


> Disclaimer: I have not yet been married to my husband for eons, so maybe I am not qualified to post this in LONG term success. But all the other topics are problem-focused.
> 
> I get depressed and stressed reading nothing but problems, so I thought I would start a thread where we could be gross and obnoxious. I'll start since I am apparently a pro at being obnoxious (I added it to my resume yesterday)
> 
> I am in the last half of my life, and I still can't believe sometimes that after I thought it was too late I found someone like my husband. I really don't deserve him, but he is more than I could ever have dreamed. It is hard to describe what it is like to be this happy; I mean, my view of what happy would look like was so skewed and lowered....it's almost surreal being in this marriage. I'm so so thankful.
> 
> Who's next?


I'm happy and have all the same thoughts as you about your H. (except reversed because I am a guy)

We hope to get married maybe this year, or next. We have a lot of moving and logistics to work out, which is exacerbating. 

But if you had asked me two or three years ago, I would have been really happy too, just not this happy. 

I am living a whole other level of happiness that I never knew existed...


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