# Infidelity must stop now (Society must take charge)



## reidqa (Mar 25, 2009)

Readers,

My gos the news today 5 children dead due to infidelity.

(CNN) -- A father who shot and killed his five children in their Washington state home before killing himself had argued with his wife over another man before the shootings, police said.

How many women/men dying or sick from spouse to whom had an affair to bring home AIDS.

A great rule prior to having an affair heard it one nice on marriage show.

Tell your lover to wait one more night before the sin, go to lawyer complete simple divorce (no nothing noted on it) sign it go home tell your spouse intentions, place on table and go have sex with your lover. 

What does this action do, empowers the victim (spouse) and eliminates any negative feeling's.

A no contect/support divorce, or spouse decide to try to recover the relationship.

Now the above STD's issue is growing, imagine giving your wife/husband a death sentence. WE NEED TO REVERT BACK TO SOME PUNISHMENTS THAT WORKED.

Female: A wife to whom cheated would be subjected to gential multilation, yes the procedure assures no further cheating but also stopped husband from sexual activity.

Male: Castration, same effect as woman punishment.

You may be replused by such.

But think of a wife/husband lying on a death bed from spousal greed.

Sorry to be so blunt, but today is has to stop.


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## marina72 (Dec 29, 2008)

While I agree that infidelity hurts people, and it would be nice if it could all just stop...

The man in WA state, shot his kids and himself, because he was Nuts.. not because his wife cheated on him. 

Granted, it may have pushed him over the edge. But to say that he was a totally normal , well adjusted, happy man, and then the act of his wife cheating, would make him want to murder all five of his children? Well, that's just nuts. Clearly someone that would do this, was not normal, or well adjusted to begin with, and already was on the brink of a total breakdown.

If this were the case, then millions of kids would die every day. Because as we all know, cheating is not that uncommon. 

Does it hurt? yes... is it wrong? Yes... does it make the spouse feel low, and horrible about themselves. Yes...

But those people don't then go out and shoot their own kids. Only crazy , lunatics do that kind of thing. 

I don't disagree that cheating can cause a lot of pain, but seriously, genital mutilation, for women, and men that cheat? That's just nuts. 

We don't live in that kind of society. Adultry is actually illegal in many states, but is almost never prosecuted anymore. In this country , we don't castrate men for cheating, or women for cheating. And even though I would be hurt if my husband did that to me... I Most certainly would never want him to be physically harmed and castrated because of something like that, or anything for that matter. If he cheated, we'd either work through it, or I'd leave if there was no hope of reconnection. 

Isn't genital mutilation ten times as sick and cruel, as cheating? 

yes, std's can be passed on by a cheating spouse, Or boyfriend, Or girlfriend. Are we going to castrate people that are Just dating too? We all know many people have pre-marital sex... should we castrate a man that cheats on his girlfriend? Or a girl that cheats on her boyfriend? 

It's just not something that would be equitable, or even sane. You don't castrate someone for cheating. That is not how we do things in this country, thank God for that...


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## TNgirl232 (Oct 5, 2008)

:iagree: I have never heard of those punishments being used for this....has anyone else. The worst I've ever heard of was something like the Scarlett Letter...


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## marina72 (Dec 29, 2008)

Well, TN girl, not in the US, they did used to do the scarlett letter, and wives that cheated were subject to severe punishments, even death. But that was like 250 years ago LOL. I think we all know that past inequalities that were put upon women, in this country, and every other country. And in some places today, women are still considered only property. 

they do still do things like this in middle eastern countries, they don't typically punish men that are adulterous, but women,,, that's another story. Even women that are Raped,,,against their will, are subject to be murdered, out of "honor" by their brother, or cousin, or father.... talk about supportive! ???

Even young girls, who are virgins, undergo genital mutilation, to have their clitoris cut out, around the age that menses sets in. They are held down, by family members, and then without any anesthetic, a male relative cuts off her clitoris, with a knife. many of the girls die from shock, or severe infections, because they don't use sterile intruments. There are also cultures that will actually sew the majority of the vagina shut, so that the girl's "virtue" is protected till she gets married. they leave only a very tiny hole for menstruation, and often times, girls die from complications from this too. supposedly, this is supposed to "prove" to the husband that the girl is given to, that she is pure, since the sewn up hole should still be in tact, and if it's not, the girl will pay the price.

genital mutilation is a horrible, grotesque act. It's not like they are circumscising a baby boy in the hospital with sterile instruments and a topicla anisthetic. they wait till the girls are between 9-13 to do this to them. imagine the pain. imagine a young boy having to be circumscised at that age, while being held down, with no pain relief.

sick... 

hey, they've got every right to do that , if' they think it's so great, or it's their culture.


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## TNgirl232 (Oct 5, 2008)

Agreed - I just figured that she would be referencing punishments held here, where we live instead of from a culture so vastly different and non-related to the majority of Americans. Mistresses were quite common and accepted in most societies (upper class anyway) for a very long time. Its always been a double standard, as are so many gender related items


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## marina72 (Dec 29, 2008)

LOL yeah, the double standard is still around too! LOL... but that is a totally different thread! I wondered if maybe the thread starter was from a different country. I dont' know.

but dang, I don't think most people would go all "lorraina bobbit" on their men, and castrate or cut of their penis

talk about severe punishment! hehe...

that man who killed his kids... he must have been totally nuts to start with. Nothing could ever make me want to shoot my own children.  it's so sad....


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## justean (May 28, 2008)

im sorry but i think there is worse than infidelity in this world to be stopped first.

shaming youngs boys and girls to become suicide bombers by raping them.
boys and girls with guns.
gangland violence and the initiation process.
child alcoholics and poverty.

endless list in my eyes.
sorry but infidelity is last on my list of priorties.


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## marina72 (Dec 29, 2008)

I agree... bigger problems in the world to solve.


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## reidqa (Mar 25, 2009)

I cannot believe the responses.

The guy went into a rage, guys remember when your wife looked at you and stated "I F**k*d another man.

A counselor once stated we are a mere 10k in years when your woman would be caught in another male the cave instantous death.

GUYS DOES THIS FAMILIAR.

Relatives are portraying a father who killed his five children and then himself as a jealous husband driven to rage by another man.

What you will augue, we have become civilized when a push of a button will kill millions of children, men and women. That is poppy****, we are the men/women in the cave.

The guy was in all likeyhood a beer guzzling nascar loving guy in a rural location. The intent was to take all out, not only the kids.

So the way I read the responses its ok to cheat possible bring home a death sentence to your spouse.

LETS DO A POLL: IF A WIFE OR HUSBAND INFECTED A LOVE ONE WITH AIDS WHAT SHALL BE THE PUNISHMENT.

1: DEATH
2: LIFE IN PRISON
3: HONEY I FORGIVE AND FORGET, BY THE WAY LOSING WEIGHT BY THE MOMENT.

The old days are barbaric well 110-125 million women, and men have undergone such and that was 1989 stats. Now with a growing muslim belief system no doubt bigger. 

If you haven't taken notice our president has a muslim agenda.

Before you post, rethink your postion if you been cheated on take the hurt and continued lies and wondering the rest of life (which BTW is quite normal), and rest of life not knowing and refrain from posting on such forums.

I have taken many lessons in 30 yrs since my ex confessed and almost 2 decades of studies.

I have updated my profile with my wife pic in which my wife at 15 yrs old, I at 30 would guide me in life how is this possible. Its called simple love, something society and couples have forgotten about.

Its called love, not some new wave feely good belief system.

Every group I have belonged to in 20 yrs the men/women do not trust any longer a cheating spouse. The orignal post stands regardless of how repulsive it made be, it offers the victimized spouse solitude of knowing it will never happen again in a marriage. Now if the marriage is over no need for the above, this is for continued marriage.

Sorry if you want feely good, ask a husband that has been cheated on how was he feeling his wife went on a grils night. NOW ASK HIM TRUTHFULLY.

Well sir, it pissed me off or was just wondering.

This is not life.


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## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

Im a big fan of anger management classes prior to marriage. and boundary classes. i think it'd do wonders.


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## reidqa (Mar 25, 2009)

Blanca,

You meant to post classes in.

Politcially correct.
How I am 1,000,000 in evolution.
Denile of human traits.

There is no anger here, reality it is.


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## TNgirl232 (Oct 5, 2008)

Ok - If having your spouse mutilated is the only way that you'll stay married to them...I say don't let the door hit you in the butt on the way out. If a person decides they want to work out a marriage where cheating was involved then they know they will have to deal with the trust issues that come along with it...if they can't handle it, sign the divorce papers without a second thought. If you say that every person who could give a person AIDS (regardless of the relationship)should be castrated, then I'm assuming your for accessing the medical records to line them all up like cattle and have that done. Because if you just wipe out the source then a cheating spouse couldn't possibly bring it back, right?


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## TNgirl232 (Oct 5, 2008)

This guy in Washington already had child services checking in to him to - so you can't blame the cheating on why he went psycho all of the sudden.

ABC 13 - National News

Local News | Father's deadly rage ignited by breakup | Seattle Times Newspaper


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## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

reidqa said:


> Blanca,
> 
> You meant to post classes in.
> 
> ...


whaaaat :scratchhead:


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## reidqa (Mar 25, 2009)

Tnt,

So you saying if your spouse is jealous (normal in relationships) its OK to cheat. There are 1,000,000's that have done the multilation/castration so to keep relationship, so there go's another of your feely good positioning.

And AIDS never answered but you have already done so.


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## TNgirl232 (Oct 5, 2008)

Ok - i'm not really following you.

But I'll try to answer....no jealousy in a spouse doesn't make it OK to cheat. Nothing makes it OK to cheat. No matter what reason lead a person to cheating its not OK. Its wrong and if the person regrets it they know there is no excuse, if they they don't regret it well, they'll blame everyone including the dog for their actions.

As for the AIDS comment - I'm not sure what you are trying to say.


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## reidqa (Mar 25, 2009)

TNT,

You are correct, sometimes we must go to the past to find why we are in the mess as a society we are in. The past a marriage was that a marriage. If it was broken there were serious issues for such behavior. If we as a society was to implmement again perhaps marriage would be a more honored ritual.

The AIDS poll, see my post if you were dying what should your spouse be subjected to.


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## TNgirl232 (Oct 5, 2008)

1 - I think it is illegal to have sex with someone if you know you have HIV/AIDS and don't disclose this fact, so if my spouse knew and did this, then off to jail with them.

2 - Society once defined marriage as a way to improve your families wealth and status...nothing about love or free choice, you were bound in contract as an infant. Do you want to go back to that, or should society define marriage based on what you think it should be?

3 - If my spouse gave me HIV/AIDS I would be livid, but I wouldn't kill them, they have a death sentence already. I don't know what I would do past that, its a case where no one knows what they would really do until they have to face it. But I do know that I couldn't just out and out kill someone no matter what.


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## reidqa (Mar 25, 2009)

1: Why do you think STD's is on the rampage, there is no prisons involved.

2: Incorrect, the main concept of marriage is an accepted moral standard to increase mankind. The orginal concept that is.

3: Please really, if you could watch your spouse being put to death would it not be great to see such. Once again no politically feely good.


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## reidqa (Mar 25, 2009)

PS,

I was cheated on.

I forgave.

I was recheated on.

I learned to use my demon as strength.

I remarried quite unusual.

I watched in pleasure as my ex destroyed herself.

I have growth stronger life long via her cheating.

A 30 yr lesson via life.


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## Tim (Mar 24, 2009)

reidqa
I think you are traumatized from the situation you put yourself into with your previous wife. 
Yes, society must take charge...we are society, hence we must take charge. 
We are responsible for whom we have relationships with, who we trust, who we decide to have sex with and who we decide to have children with. We all make mistakes and we should really just concentrate on the mistakes WE made.

You made a lot of mistakes in your past, I'm not going to tell you what they were because only you know that although there are obvious ones from what I can see.

Ever try moving on? Your stuck on this infidelity thing that happened so many years ago...more than 10 years? Yes we all are stuck at the moment but ours are much more fresh in our experiences and we are all trying to move on and understand ourselves....I see you uploaded old pictures of your wife on here....whats the point? Why do you still look at them? 

Your acting like a victim. Stop being a victim and take charge of yourself.


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## sunflower (Dec 15, 2008)

Wow REIDQA 

Seriously man you need to let it go people are crazy in general look at all the crazy people killing children for no reason or killing to kill I mean come on you really think we should give a punishment for cheaters like death or prison I can see the anger and hate but really I am feeling sorry for your wife (Current wife) cause she is dealing with your past demons.


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## marina72 (Dec 29, 2008)

3: Please really, if you could watch your spouse being put to death would it not be great to see such.

Reid... this is just scary.... 

No, I don't think most people would think, watching your spouse being put to death, would be "great to see such"..

Wow... that is just totally nuts. Where are you from, originally? If you were born in the US, are your family from somewhere else? 

I'm sorry Reid... but saying that it would be nice to watch your spouse being put to death, because they cheated on you? that is just not a normal thing to say....

this isn't just my opinion... it's a fact....


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## reidqa (Mar 25, 2009)

People,

She sentenced herself, the executioner was life.

Full blown AIDS, see as her party good time life continued the disease was attacking then came the endless cold.

Born, Bronx, parents Bronx.

Well one day will hear about the lever being pulled, and not by my nor any human hand.

Amazing how destiny weaves its web.


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## marina72 (Dec 29, 2008)

I'm sorry to hear that your ex wife contracted Aids... that is very sad. I wouldn't wish that on anyone, whether I liked them or not, whether they cheated on me or not...

I hope if she's gone that she's found some peace in her life.


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## reidqa (Mar 25, 2009)

marina,

Read my first post, its all karma.

Don't know bits of info recieved.


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## marina72 (Dec 29, 2008)

"Don't know bits of info recieved."

not sure what you mean by that.

Plenty of people that are serial cheaters, don't catch aids.. and for all you know, she might have been a drug user, after you left her, and contracted it through dirty needles.. that is very common.

I don't think Aids is a karma thing... it's a disease, that Anyone can get. 
You do realize, of course.... that even someone, that is a virgin, just married, and makes love for the first time... can get HIV... if their partner has it, and does not know.....

it's not a cheating thing, so much as it is a sexually transmitted disease... and it doesn't discriminate...

the only way to stay safe, is through abstinence... and not using drugs. And of course people in the medical profession are always exposed to some risk, as they work with people who have the disease.

I have to say I'm taken aback at your glee that your ex wife had Aids.. that shouldn't make anyone happy. And although I understand she cheated on you... that is not a reason to be so filled with unadulterated hatred, especially after almost 30 years, perhaps you need to seek some therapy. You have said you thought it was funny when she feel down the stairs, and that it was a satisfying experience, you watched with "pleasure" as you saw her suffering with Aids...

She cheated on you,,, I get that... but , if you are this type of person... that has such a distorted, masochistic view of reality, someone who's in favor of castration for cheaters , and says things like "wouldn't it be great to see your spouse put to death"... and think aids for your ex wife is funny and deserved... kind of makes me wonder how you treated her while she was married to you. 

Just an observation. Good luck..... I truly hope you are happy with your new wife, and I hope you can someday let go of this insane hatred and scary outlook...


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## Tim (Mar 24, 2009)

...your obsessed.

Perhaps you should've just posted about AIDS and how your last wife got it, and a message about AIDS and wearing condoms....

Other than that...you need help.


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## sunflower (Dec 15, 2008)

Ya I wouldnt wish that on my enemy Really that in itself is karma if you are thinking karma. Normal people would feel sorry for them that there life took that detor. Its sad. I just think that you are like Tim said OBSESSED. and like I said before I really feel bad for your current wife that you are putting this much thought and effort into this other women. I am really suprised that your current wife didnt leave LONG ago. Cause if its this strong after 28 years I can only imagine what it was like in the beg.


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## reidqa (Mar 25, 2009)

Guys,

Not obsessed whatsoever.

My wife actually hates her also, after 1 yr we bumped into each other. 

I say hello this is my wife she in turn stated I don't want to meet the F**kin b***ch.

People please now now no advice required. Its a great study in human behavior, no doubt my learning at least an MA in the subject matter.

I am quite a lucky male having lived literally my life twice once thru my eyes and then my wifes.

My wife right now taking a bubble bath, going into Manhattan, see we are kids still.


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## H8M32DAY (Oct 16, 2008)

Your ex was done with you a loooong time ago. How long are you going to carry her on your back? You are only letting her weigh you down so that you cannot fully enjoy your life now. Forget her, set yourself free.


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## reidqa (Mar 25, 2009)

H,

You quite confused, I was done with her a long time ago. Now carry how about throw her down. 

Long forgotten about, and my freedom was walking out the door.


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## sunflower (Dec 15, 2008)

Then why are you still bringing it up and living this way?


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## reidqa (Mar 25, 2009)

Sun,

Its a great study in human destructiveness, not only to yourself but to loved one.

Think about it, you will destroy a person to whom life long commitment was made, oh please don't post the feely good forgive and forget. That is political gody two shoes feelings.

It is a known fact cheated on spouse lives the memory until death, like a person that kills another by accident, its never forgotten.

Oh wait its 2009 era of feely good BS.

Sorry human traits carries more weight.


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