# What should I do?



## frustrated wife (Oct 18, 2014)

Hi and thanks for taking time to read this. I really need some advice but ave no one to talk to. I am 29 and have been with my OH for 6 years and married for 3. He is 32. For the last 4 years our sex life has been non existent, and I dont mean once a month like most other stories on line I have read, I mean once a year if I am lucky! I often try to iniatiate sex and every single time I get rejected which I am sure you will agree is heartbreaking. For the last year I have been seriously thinking about what to do and can I live like this. And yes I have spoken to him about it. He has no real answers and just says he will try. Its not just the sex, I feel like we are now room mates. He doesnt even kiss me! A few months ago I met a guy on a night out and we flirted. OH found out and kicked me out! A week later I moved back home and told him that I need more affection as I may not have cheated this time but I could have and as I am only human I cant promise I wont next time if I am so ridicuously sexually frustrated. Now I dont condone cheating but I need sex! I thought that saying something like that to him would make him sit up an take action but no. Few months on and nothing as changed! I love him but cant live rest of my life like this, cant bear the thought of breaking his heart if I left though. Please help, even if you dont think you can it will be nice just to talk to someone about this. Thanks x


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## WandaJ (Aug 5, 2014)

It has been like this four years our of six? It will only be downhill from here. 

just make sure you do not get pregnant, it will be easier.


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## ReidWright (May 15, 2014)

are his reasons for rejecting you specific? or just delaying tactics? credible?

how was it for those first two years? what changed?


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## cdbaker (Nov 5, 2010)

Has their been any marriage counseling? Or suggestion of trying Marriage counseling? If so, what has been his response? In fact, what kind of effort has he said he will or is willing to commit to?

Has separation or the D-word been brought up yet?


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## VFW (Oct 24, 2012)

frustrated wife said:


> Few months on and nothing as changed! I love him but cant live rest of my life like this


If that is a true statement, then you have already answered your own question. No you shouldn't have to live in a sexless relationship, what your asking is what every spouse should not only give, but expect to receive. Why is he doing this? Well you know him better than me. Has he always been like this? If not when did it change? Has he seen a physician? If put in this position, I would suggest therapy as this is not normal and if he refuses, then there is your answer. If you don't see a fix to it, then end the relationship. Always best to end one relationship before you start another one.


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## Chuck71 (Nov 5, 2012)

Would he by chance have ED? Most guys would rather die a painful

death than admit this to our spouse. If he wants things to work... he

needs to have his T checked (and other things as well). Set him an 

appointment...make him go...but stay in the lobby. Best of luck!


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## pixie1 (Sep 27, 2014)

Sounds alot like my marriage. My husband gave me sex more frequently, a few times a month. This was a decrease from our normal. I received very little physical affection or attention. First forward a few years and I have just found out he was in an affair. Some of the time he withheld sex because he got it from her other times it was due to depression. Be careful girl he may be cheating.


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