# How do you know when its over?



## REW (Jan 15, 2011)

How do you know when the relationship is over? 

We've been together for about 4.5 years. Engaged a little over one of the years. The past 6 months or so have been rough. We argue and spend little time together even though we live together. Part of it is because I'm in class (8-5ish), but in the evenings and weekends he is gone with his friends usually until midnight (when I'm already sleeping). It just doesn't feel like he's trying. I've told him how I felt, he even said he's sorry he made me sad. I told him, if its over its over, just tell me and dont drag this out for either of us. But how do i know its over?


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

When you have no feeling for him anymore, it is over! 

When you don't feel like being touched by him anymore, it is over!

When you feel " tomorrow you are alive or not doesn't matter anymore", it is over!


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## Hot Alpha Female (Jan 6, 2011)

Well you probably have to sit down with him and just discuss where it is going to go. Whether or not this is something that you want to work out or whether it's something that you just need to call the quits on.

If you do decide that its not something that is worth working out, then someone needs to move out. You can't be in this weird "we are kind of in a relationship but not really" situation. That is toxic to you and its toxic to him too.

Find out what you want. Find out what he wants. Then make a solid decision and stick by it =)

Hot Alpha Female


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## Tru2mself (Sep 3, 2010)

Maybe he wants you to be the bad guy and say its over ? I swear men can be such cowards sometimes he would rather have his tooth pulled than facing breaking up with a girlfriend ,unless there is another woman involved , in that case she is going to make him make the decision real quick . But you get the idea .


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## REW (Jan 15, 2011)

Over the past couple of days we have talked. We both say we still want to be together, but dont know how to or where to begin. 

I know i hurt him about a month ago, when I made a decision and didn't consider his feelings. He told me that since then he feels broken. I asked if he still loved me, and he said he does, but he feels different.

How do we begin to repair our relationship?


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## marksaysay (Oct 15, 2010)

On Affaircare.com, there are a couple of quizzes that would he a great place to start. One is title "Love extinguishers" and the other is "love kindlers". These will allow the two of you to recognize areas where the two of you have fallen short and give you things to address. Relationships are two-sided, so no one partner is totally responsible for the breakdown. Also, "The 5 Love Languages" is a good book. Maybe the two of you are not expressing love in a way that the other needs.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## major misfit (Oct 17, 2010)

To answer your question of how do you know when it's over...for ME, it was when I realized that I would have PAID someone to take him off my hands. If he had only gotten involved with someone else, so he would leave me alone. THAT was when I knew it was truly over.


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