# Looking to get opinion from Woman who left, and has decided to never communicate



## Hrtn (Mar 22, 2013)

My wife left after 19 year relationship, 2 kids.

Its been a year, still will not talk about what happened, or respond to email. Tough for me to get "closure".

If you have done this, why?
What went on inside you?

Will it be forever, never talk, to your ex husband?
Never tell him what was happening when, why would you do that to him?

Maybe if i can understand you, i will understand her.


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## American Arrogance (Sep 5, 2008)

Each situation and circumstances are different. I try to minimize talking to my STBEX simply because he is verbally abusive. Everytime we do talk he always attempts to degrade me, or try to make me feel inferior. He can be very childish. Last communication we had I had asked him to get our daughters school books. He brought up another situation, off topic, and then when I didnt want to talk about that I just hung up on it. He responded by texting me that he wont allow his daughter to get her school books. 

Not only that but my body goes through stress when I get a text from him. I get severe migraines, my skin starts to overheat, my eyesight gets fuzzy. Its pretty bad. So I have to autoreject his calls. It cuts down on the stress and arguments. He then contacts our children to relay messages to me. Its pretty bad. I just want to be left alone to clear my head.

Not saying this is what your wife is going through but she probably has moved on. And may have felt that she made herself clear before she left and has no need to continue contact.


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## Hrtn (Mar 22, 2013)

Sorry to hear about the abuse. Is he in love with you?


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## Morgiana (Oct 18, 2011)

@hrtn, if he was, which aa might not know, would that make his behavior okay? Love unfortunately does not conquer all...

If your wife has moved on, you need to figure out how to as well, there are many links to the 180 on these boards, that is what you should be focusing on, not your ex. What culpability did you have in the marriage failing? What can you work on personally? Take ownership of your shortcomings and work to improve yourself. There are lots of situations in life where you don't get the resolution you want, this may be one of them. How you overcome it is what is important.


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