# Won't leave the past behind us!



## TugOfWar (Mar 9, 2012)

My marriage has been troubled for quite some time. Three years ago we BOTH had affairs. During that time, my husband monitored everything I did from facebook, to email to text message. We both decided to work on our marriage, but when things don't go his way sexually he brings MY past affairs. He says he's using it as an example of what he wants sexually. He assumes I did more things sexually in my affair than I do with him. Is he right for doing this or am I missing something?


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## Initfortheduration (Dec 12, 2008)

Did you do more things in your affair?


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## TugOfWar (Mar 9, 2012)

Not at all. He thinks I did because he saw a conversation and I asked the guy to please talk to me. He says I never asked him that. But when my husband and I talk he can be very abusive with his words.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Ok well flip it. Tellhim he fvcked someone else too so he needs a better argument. Ugh. That sounds very annoying. He's doing it to control you.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Kurosity (Dec 22, 2011)

I would tell him off. Plain as day that it is not right to try to guilt you into actions of a sexual nature that you do not wish to do. That is wrong.

Also he should not be using your affair as an example. I would tell him to find a different way to express his desires then to bring up people that interfered with your marriage. Just not helathy at all. (It is like letting them remain in your life) :scratchhead:


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## DanF (Sep 27, 2010)

You both need to drop the past affairs. I have been there. It's tough. See my stories in my sig and show them to your husband.


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## AngryandUsed (Jun 23, 2011)

He is being manipulative and maneuvoring for his advantage. 

Time for MC?


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