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## Richard Richard (Aug 28, 2021)

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## ElwoodPDowd (Aug 25, 2021)

Richard Richard said:


> Should I continue to give my blessing to the meeting to help my wife with her grief or make it clear I disapprove? I would love to know other peoples views.


Tell her you're fine with it, think it's a great idea, and you've just arranged to meet your high school sweetheart the same day.


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## manwithnoname (Feb 3, 2017)

Absolutely should not be ok with it. There's a recent thread on here where the guy's girlfriend got back with her ex.

There must be other people who knew her dad that she could talk to?


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## DudeInProgress (Jun 10, 2019)

Not acceptable in my opinion. You made a mistake in agreeing, but you are not bound by that mistake. I would not allow it.

It sounds like complete BS to me but if you believe it’s a legit, good-faith request, you can give her an option: she can still meet him for coffee, as long as you’re there also. 
If she’s on the level, there will be no problem with the 3 of you meeting to reminisce about dad. You can learn more about what a great man he was.


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

She’s asking to go on a date with her ex.
Dude………………😔😔


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## AGoodFlogging (Dec 19, 2020)

I do like Elwood's take!

However assuming your ex isn't down for a coffee and teary hug session then I think that this is not cool.


It will be a highly emotional situation.
she will want comforting in her grief.
she has told you he still has feeling for her.

Classic "well he was there for me and one thing led to another" territory.

Tell her that she is an adult and can make her own choices but does she think it is wise to meet someone 1:1 who she acknowledges still has feelings for her and how would she feel if you did the same? Say that if you were this guy you would be assuming that she was romantically interested in him and would be looking to use the emotional situation to gain intimacy. Tell her that you are surprised that she thinks this is okay.


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## BigDaddyNY (May 19, 2021)

Richard Richard said:


> Hi all. My wife and I had a few too many drinks at a party recently. All was good and we both genuinely had a good time. When we arrived home she immediately began to cry and said she wants to meet up with her ex of 11 years for a coffee, she lost her father about a year ago and said she wants to talk to someone who knew her dad. I didn’t know him very well as we’ve been married only a couple of years.
> 
> I initially agreed because I thought it might help her come to terms with her loss. When we discussed it more it was clear they’d be tears and hugging involved, which obviously makes me uneasy.
> She said she doesn’t miss her ex but admitted he still has feelings for her. Should I continue to give my blessing to the meeting to help my wife with her grief or make it clear I disapprove? I would love to know other peoples views.


I would say absolutely no way. You are her shoulder to cry on, not her Ex. You've put yourself in a bit if a bind since you agreed, but everyone can change their mind. If you must compromise, then you go with to the meeting.


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## Blondilocks (Jul 4, 2013)

When you divorce you give up the right to be comforted by that person. How very selfish of her. She needs to be looking to you for comfort. Using her ex is mean to him and to you.


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

They must have been in touch to set this up. Did she tell you she was in contact with him? Do you know who contacted who first? Ask her if she will show you the messages.

If she needs help with her grief then suggest she sees a grief counsellor. 

It's hard to know if the thing about her mum is an excuse to see him or not, but I think it's very unwise for her to meet with him knowing he still likes her. 

Give her the option of you going with her, even if you sit the other side of the cafe maybe.


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

Richard Richard said:


> Hi all. My wife and I had a few too many drinks at a party recently. All was good and we both genuinely had a good time. When we arrived home she immediately began to cry and said she wants to meet up with her ex of 11 years for a coffee, she lost her father about a year ago and said she wants to talk to someone who knew her dad.


This is just plain creepy. Something is really amiss here. She's got a few screws loose or something. 

Rather than reconnecting with an ex, getting with a professional counselor or therapist would be better time and money spent.


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## D0nnivain (Mar 13, 2021)

They can video chat if all she wants to do is talk about her dad. There is no reason for her to arrange to have coffee with him.


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## coquille (May 8, 2018)

A woman speaking here. I think you should not allow this meeting to happen. Your wife's ex still has feeling for her and she knows this. There are plenty of people around her who knew her father; she can reminisce about her father with them. Meeting up with the ex will bring old feelings and memories and open up new doors that everyone would rather have closed forever. 
If you decide to retract your approval of this meeting, I think you should tell your wife in plain terms about the reasons you think it's a bad idea that she meets with him. If she cares about this marriage, she will agree to your terms. Plain and simple.


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

I also want to caution that some kind of serious personal crisis or event can often be a precipitating factor leading to marital breakdown and affairs etc. 

The critical illness/death etc of a parent or sibling or child, BFF or some other close loved one can precipitate some kind of upheaval in someone's life to disrupt their normal functioning and lead them to seek other connections and can lead people to parking their shoes under someone else's bed. 

It's not uncommon at all to hear men telling stories of their wive's infidelity where the first sentence or two starts out with, "After my wife's father/mother/brother/sister/grandparent etc died last year she began seeing an old friend/ex/someone from home town etc. 

The death of a parent or someone very close is an actual red flag. Take this very seriously. This is a well documented precipitating factor in women dropping their clothes on someone else's bedroom floor.


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## In Absentia (Aug 21, 2012)

I would say, go for it. If she wants to cheat with him, she will cheat regardless.


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

In Absentia said:


> I would say, go for it. If she wants to cheat with him, she will cheat regardless.


This is more nuanced than that. 

This isn't your typical cheater scenario that is about entitlement and low character and overactive hormones etc etc.

serious grief after the death of a close family member can mess up normal, decent people's headspace and be a precipitating factor in things they would not normally do. Even normal wives who had been perfectly content and faithful for decades have fallen off the rails after the death of a parent or very close relative.


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## Captain Obvious (Mar 14, 2021)

I’d ask your wife who’s she going to run off and cry to when she loses her husband over this.

A highly emotional wife reconnecting with an old boyfriend so they can grieve together while the husband is not around. This This is a horrible idea.


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## Marc878 (Aug 26, 2015)

She’s going on a date. Cmon man. Wake up!! They’ve already been talking. *Check your phone bill.*
It’s probably an emotional affair getting ready to turn into a sexual affair.
Save yourself the pain and agony. Let her go. Help pack her bags.


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## Marc878 (Aug 26, 2015)

Captain Obvious said:


> I’d ask your wife who’s she going to run off and cry to when she loses her husband over this.
> 
> A highly emotional wife reconnecting with an old boyfriend so they can grieve together while the husband is not around. This This is a horrible idea.


They’ve already been in contact. She wants to take it further.


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## jjj858 (Jun 18, 2021)

Absolutely wouldn’t allow this in a million years. She’s testing the waters here for an affair with him. If he still has feelings for her it’s likely she still does for him too. Tell her “sure honey you can meet up with your ex, I’ll be meeting with my lawyer the same day”. Don’t be a fool here. You’re getting played. She’s using a sob story to try and start an affair with an ex. Nobody’s ex cares that much about their ex-gf’s father. If she wants to know about her father she can talk to his blood relatives. What a bogus excuse she’s using to meet up with this guy.


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## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

No.


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## Marc878 (Aug 26, 2015)

jjj858 said:


> Absolutely wouldn’t allow this in a million years. She’s testing the waters here for an affair with him. If he still has feelings for her it’s likely she still does for him too. Tell her “sure honey you can meet up with your ex, I’ll be meeting with my lawyer the same day”. Don’t be a fool here. You’re getting played. She’s using a sob story to try and start an affair with an ex. Nobody’s ex cares that much about their ex-gf’s father. If she wants to know about her father she can talk to his blood relatives. What a bogus excuse she’s using to meet up with this guy.


Yep, this is a boo hoo ******** story if I’ve ever seen one.


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## notmyjamie (Feb 5, 2019)

I'd say 'sure, when are we meeting him?" If she says she wanted to go alone I'd tell her that your marriage vows don't really allow for dating another person and meeting a guy who has feelings for you is, in fact, a date and how would she feel if the tables were turned. 

If she's struggling that much with her Dad's death she should consider therapy. I'm sorry for her loss but that's no reason to step out on you.


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

I agree that they have been in contact. 

you don't just blurt out that you want to get together with an ex out of the blue. They've been in contact and have already been discussing the logistics of getting together.


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

Richard Richard said:


> Hi all. My wife and I had a few too many drinks at a party recently. All was good and we both genuinely had a good time. When we arrived home she immediately began to cry and said she wants to meet up with her ex of 11 years for a coffee, she lost her father about a year ago and said she wants to talk to someone who knew her dad. I didn’t know him very well as we’ve been married only a couple of years.
> 
> I initially agreed because I thought it might help her come to terms with her loss. When we discussed it more it was clear they’d be tears and hugging involved, which obviously makes me uneasy.
> She said she doesn’t miss her ex but admitted he still has feelings for her. Should I continue to give my blessing to the meeting to help my wife with her grief or make it clear I disapprove? I would love to know other peoples views.


I don't think you should encourage her to do that at all. She's going to be too vulnerable. Does she not have a relative who knew her father she can talk to or a childhood friend? Even though he knew her father was he actually very invested in him? If so would not he had been at the funeral?


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## VladDracul (Jun 17, 2016)

Richard Richard said:


> She said she doesn’t miss her ex but admitted he still has feelings for her.


Here, I fixed it for you

"She said she doesn’t miss her ex but admitted she still has feelings for him".

I'm dealing with my best old friends son with the same problem. His wife wants to F her ex like your old lady does. Maybe I need to get the two of you together. What kind of stooge are you Richard and what's lacking in you that she feels she needs to be fixed by another man. My advise is to tell Ms. Wants to talk to someone who knew her dad, that if she wants to meet up with her ex you better be going along for the ride. She's going to hit you up with controlling, not trusting her, jealous of her ex et cetera. All that is a test to see whether you can back up what you say. Stand your ground or face looking even weaker than you appear. But hey, I may be to harsh. After all, her ex the only person on earth she can talk to who knew her dad. I've concluded your a real beta guy but please tell me youre not that damn stupid.


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

When she comes back from her date and tells you it really helped her in the grieving process to meet her old “friend” and talk about dear old Dad what are you going to do?
Especially when she wants to do it again……,,


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

And here is a little experiment that guys should do any time their wife/GF wants to get together with an ex or old BF or any other guy for coffee just to "catch up" or commiserate over the loss of a mutual friend/relative or whatever - 

Take her phone and text the dude and say, "I'm not sure how long I'll actually be able to contain myself over coffee. Could you get a motel room nearby for when we've had enough chit chat? "

Then see what his reply is.


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## VladDracul (Jun 17, 2016)

oldshirt said:


> And here is a little experiment that guys should do any time their wife/GF wants to get together with an ex or old BF or any other guy for coffee just to "catch up" or commiserate over the loss of a mutual friend/relative or whatever -


Yep, halfway through the coffee, the conversation will have gone from reminiscing about her dad to reminiscing about the way they used to F and the wonderful BJ she used to give him..


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## BigDaddyNY (May 19, 2021)

oldshirt said:


> And here is a little experiment that guys should do any time their wife/GF wants to get together with an ex or old BF or any other guy for coffee just to "catch up" or commiserate over the loss of a mutual friend/relative or whatever -
> 
> Take her phone and text the dude and say, "I'm not sure how long I'll actually be able to contain myself over coffee. Could you get a motel room nearby for when we've had enough chit chat? "
> 
> Then see what his reply is.


If the breakup was amicable enough for them to even consider being near each other again I will guarantee that every single ex BF/H will fail that test.


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## Benbutton (Oct 3, 2019)

Richard Richard said:


> Hi all. My wife and I had a few too many drinks at a party recently. All was good and we both genuinely had a good time. When we arrived home she immediately began to cry and said she wants to meet up with her ex of 11 years for a coffee, she lost her father about a year ago and said she wants to talk to someone who knew her dad. I didn’t know him very well as we’ve been married only a couple of years.
> 
> I initially agreed because I thought it might help her come to terms with her loss. When we discussed it more it was clear they’d be tears and hugging involved, which obviously makes me uneasy.
> She said she doesn’t miss her ex but admitted he still has feelings for her. Should I continue to give my blessing to the meeting to help my wife with her grief or make it clear I disapprove? I would love to know other peoples views.


Oh HELL NO!! That's what you're there for, not him. Make sure you hold firm to your boundaries, she breaks them then you leave.


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## sideways (Apr 12, 2016)

Not just no but HELL NO!!

If your wife is wanting to talk about her father I'm sure she can find someone else (a relative or a girlfriend etc).

Expect your wife to try and spin this that you're now "controlling".

Tell she can go and meet with him, but not as your wife, so she needs to decide right there. She chooses to go and meet with him there's your answer as she just stepped right over your boundary.

Even if she doesn't go I would keep my eyes open. This doesn't sound right. Sounds like she may be using that reason as an excuse to meet with him.


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## Marc878 (Aug 26, 2015)

VladDracul said:


> Yep, halfway through the coffee, the conversation will have gone from reminiscing about her dad to reminiscing about the way they used to F and the wonderful BJ she used to give him..


They’ve already discussed this on the phone. Betcha!


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## Marc878 (Aug 26, 2015)

Only been married a year? I’d toss this one back especially after seeing the phone bills.


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## In Absentia (Aug 21, 2012)

Her dad died a year ago and she wants to meet her ex boyfriend now? It's clearly an excuse. I suspect something's already going on.


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## jjj858 (Jun 18, 2021)

When he objects to this she’s going to start spinning this that the OP is controlling and emotionally abusive and all the usual gaslight tactics they use when they don’t get their way.

I’m also curious if this ex lives in town who’s to say they haven’t already been meeting up? I think she’s possibly been having an ongoing EA with him.

Time for a phone text recovery and a VAR. Will she let you look at her phone or does she guard it? Do you have her Lock Screen password? I would demand access if not. You need to start looking at your phone bill if you have a family plan on a shared account and see who she’s been talking to.


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## BigDaddyNY (May 19, 2021)

Marc878 said:


> They’ve already discussed this on the phone. Betcha!


How could they not have. He must be expecting her the way it was stated.


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## Richard Richard (Aug 28, 2021)

Thanks everyone.


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## Noman (Oct 17, 2014)

DudeInProgress said:


> It sounds like complete BS to me but if you believe it’s a legit, good-faith request, you can give her an option: she can still meet him for coffee, as long as you’re there also.


And make sure your jacket drapes open a few times so he can see your 1911 in the shoulder holster.


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## Noman (Oct 17, 2014)

There seems to be a chapter missing in your story.

What happened at the party, other than over-indulgence?

What caused to her breakdown when you got home?

Was the ex there?

There must have been some sort of trigger.


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## Marc878 (Aug 26, 2015)

Nothing really matters much. Her actions tell you everything. Get out now or suffer later.


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## jlg07 (Feb 24, 2017)

D0nnivain said:


> They can video chat if all she wants to do is talk about her dad. There is no reason for her to arrange to have coffee with him.


With YOU sitting next the screen....


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## Marc878 (Aug 26, 2015)

jlg07 said:


> With YOU sitting next the screen....


This is just delaying the inevitable. Why bother?


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## Marc878 (Aug 26, 2015)

Richard Richard said:


> Thanks everyone.


There was one guy on here who’s wife pulled something similar. He told her she could do as she pleased but not as his wife. However, this early on is probably a harbinger of worse/more to come IMO.


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## Trident (May 23, 2018)

Agree with those who are suggesting this is a symptom of a much bigger problem. You might win this particular battle but not the war.


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

No.

I vividly remember losing my father...we were thick as thieves and after 9 years I still can't talk about him without tearing up.

I had multiple exes who knew him and it never occurred to me to want to talk to any of them. They were EXES and I had no interest in sharing that level of vulnerability with any of them.

Your wife has poor boundaries. If you intend to stay married I think its a good idea to let her know that if this is how things are going to be you'll start looking up ex gf's.


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

Marc878 said:


> There was one guy on here who’s wife pulled something similar. He told her she could do as she pleased but not as his wife. However, this early on is probably a harbinger of worse/more to come IMO.


I remember that story but I can’t remember who posted it. The woman in question was supposed to be going to a fitness class but her husband noticed she was too well dressed for that. When he questioned her she said a few people from the class were going for a meal, eventually she confessed that she was meeting the only guy who came to the class to discuss his upcoming divorce and give him some advice as a friend. 
The op told her that his wife was not allowed to go on dates with other men. He told her if she went she wasn’t to bother coming home. She then said she would just go and explain to her “friend” that she couldn’t stay out but the op told her the same rules applied.
She didn’t go but the op had lost all trust in her and eventually they separated.


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## Marc878 (Aug 26, 2015)

I just never saw where cockblocking works that well or why you’d want someone like that around.


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## Trident (May 23, 2018)

lifeistooshort said:


> If you intend to stay married I think its a good idea to let her know that if this is how things are going to be you'll start looking up ex gf's.


I’m thinking that particular strategy is not going to keep the marriage intact for very long.


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## DudeInProgress (Jun 10, 2019)

Noman said:


> And make sure your jacket drapes open a few times so he can see your 1911 in the shoulder holster.


1911s are a bit bulky and heavy to carry. There are better options I think


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

Trident said:


> I’m thinking that particular strategy is not going to keep the marriage intact for very long.


Probably not, but I have found that a little empathy can go a long way.

The whole walk in my shoes thing.....


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## BigDaddyNY (May 19, 2021)

lifeistooshort said:


> No.
> 
> I vividly remember losing my father...we were thick as thieves and after 9 years I still can't talk about him without tearing up.
> 
> ...


Exactly. When my wife's father died many years ago her ex-fiance knew him much better than I did. I only met him a couple times very briefly. She never in a million years would consider contacting her ex about it.


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

VladDracul said:


> Yep, halfway through the coffee, the conversation will have gone from reminiscing about her dad to reminiscing about the way they used to F and the wonderful BJ she used to give him..


Which will remind her why she broke up with him to begin with 😄


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## mickybill (Nov 29, 2016)

The best reply is that you join them because you never got to meet the old man...you'd love to hear fun stories...if she declines then you are the third wheel and that is unacceptable.


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## ABHale (Jan 3, 2016)

I would ask to see her phone. If she lets you, look to see if they have been messaging each other. If she doesn’t let you see it or takes a minute to delete stuff then you know she has been talking with her ex already.

If she ask you why, be honest what you are looking for.

Remember that a wayward spouse will put an ex under a different name to keep from raising suspicion.


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## Captain Obvious (Mar 14, 2021)

I would ask your wife just how exactly does she know her ex still has feelings for her. As many others have pointed out on here, she's been in contact with him recently, just how much contact remains to be seen. Two things are possibly going on here. 1) Your wife is actively trying to rekindle things with her ex. 2) Your wife's ex knows she is emotionally vulnerable right now and is trying to manipulate her. Either way, your wife still knows her ex has feelings for her and wants to meet up.


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## Marc878 (Aug 26, 2015)

ABHale said:


> I would ask to see her phone. If she lets you, look to see if they have been messaging each other. If she doesn’t let you see it or takes a minute to delete stuff then you know she has been talking with her ex already.
> 
> If she ask you why, be honest what you are looking for.
> 
> Remember that a wayward spouse will put an ex under a different name to keep from raising suspicion.


Just go online and view the phone bill.


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## Evinrude58 (Jun 16, 2014)

Being the supportive husband you are, tell her you’ll come along and be there for her as well.
If she wants to go alone, tell her she’s allowed to make dates with her exes, but to make it a good one because you want a date with her too And will be happy to make her your ex as well. Problem solved.


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## blackclover3 (Apr 23, 2021)

she is trying to make cuckold may be?


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## jjj858 (Jun 18, 2021)

This is a great old post I found that sums everything up about this kinda thing. Credit to user F-102

“She wants to contact an old BF? I would put my foot down and say no, because the conversations between them will start out like: "Hey, how's it going?", or "What's so-and-so been up to?" 

But soon, it may morph into:

Their lives since they parted
Their relationships since they parted 
Their families
Their spouses
You
How you're a great husband
How you're an excellent father
How you're a wonderful guy
Your job
How your job keeps you busy
How your job keeps you away
How she sometimes feels lonely when you're away 
How she sometimes feels a little overburdened at home
How she sometimes feels a little taken for granted
How she feels that you don't ALWAYS listen to her
How she feels that you don't ALWAYS understand her
How sometimes she feels that you're just "not there" for her
How...okay, you're not ALWAYS such a wonderful guy
How she loved hearing from him
How she loves talking to him again
How she looks forward to his texts/calls/e-mails now
How she feels young again
How she feels attractive again
How she feels appreciated again
How it's so nice to have someone just LISTEN again
How it's been so, so long since you made her feel that way
How her eyes have been opened
How she now realizes what she truly wants and needs
How you could NEVER give her what she truly wants and needs
How insensitive you can be sometimes
How you can be a real jerk sometimes
How she wonders if they would have stayed together
How she now realizes that she never really loved you
How she now realizes that she really loved him all along
How she ever could have fallen in love with a jerk like you
How you're the biggest a**hole she's ever known
How you're standing in the way of her true happiness
How you ruined her life
How she made a big mistake marrying you
How she made an even bigger mistake letting him go
How they were really meant to be together
How she desperately has to get away from you
How she's definitely going to leave you
How she's been secretly meeting with divorce lawywers
How they're going to live happily ever after...

...get the picture?”


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## TJW (Mar 20, 2012)

Richard Richard said:


> My wife and I had a few too many drinks at a party recently.


Alcohol is a "truth serum". It removes inhibitions. This desire, on her part, has been lurking out of your view in her mind.
Set a hard boundary on this. Do not allow it. Either she is married to you, or she is married to him. Fix up an envelope with several
of the more costly household bills. Give it to her, and tell her to get her ex to take care of them.


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## Marc878 (Aug 26, 2015)

Why bother? Just let her go. Only been married a couple of years. Correct your mistake.


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## NicoleT (Jun 4, 2010)

oldshirt said:


> I also want to caution that some kind of serious personal crisis or event can often be a precipitating factor leading to marital breakdown and affairs etc.
> 
> The critical illness/death etc of a parent or sibling or child, BFF or some other close loved one can precipitate some kind of upheaval in someone's life to disrupt their normal functioning and lead them to seek other connections and can lead people to parking their shoes under someone else's bed.
> 
> ...


My best friend of 22 years' sister passed away just under a year ago and now by bestie has decided to come out of the closet. You may be on to something there.


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## Young at Heart (Jan 6, 2015)

It always amazes me how people put themselves in horrible places on purpose. I mean whether it is a woman who wants to meet an ex at a hotel bar, two co-workers who go out for a drink together, a guy who goes to a strip club or skanky massage parlor, it is temptation that can easily be avoided.

It is almost like people are testing themselves, their character or their commitment to their marriage. Usually, the next comment is "and then one thing lead to another and we had sex." I wonder if there is some "thrill" that people get from dancing on the edge of disaster and seeing if they will behave or fail. Totally preventable.

Now, while I think it is a very bad idea, I am not sure "forbidding something" is the right answer. Telling her it is a bad idea and will cause some serious trust issues in your marriage or suggesting a combination of individual counseling with couples marriage counseling to move through the loss of her father might be better. Drawing lines in the sand, power plays is not how a marriage is suppose to work. To often it sparks "rebellion."


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## Amanhasnoname (Apr 1, 2021)

Captain Obvious said:


> I would ask your wife just how exactly does she know her ex still has feelings for her. As many others have pointed out on here, she's been in contact with him recently, just how much contact remains to be seen. Two things are possibly going on here. 1) Your wife is actively trying to rekindle things with her ex. 2) Your wife's ex knows she is emotionally vulnerable right now and is trying to manipulate her. Either way, your wife still knows her ex has feelings for her and wants to meet up.


*This.*
I would be interested to know if OP knew of all these discussions going on between his wife and her ex!


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## Noman (Oct 17, 2014)

DudeInProgress said:


> 1911s are a bit bulky and heavy to carry. There are better options I think


Like what, a mini-gun?

Nothing says, "You're ****ed," better than a full-sized Colt 1911 Govt Model. Blued, of course.

Ol' Slab Sides definitely has a presence.


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## ABHale (Jan 3, 2016)

I think her asking to go and meet her ex 1 on 1 says everything. She knows her past and is still asking this. She knows exactly what she is doing. She knows her ex’s intentions and is ok with it.

To use the death of her dad as a cover speaks volumes.


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## Marc878 (Aug 26, 2015)

Richard Richard said:


> Thanks everyone.


Have you gone online and checked the phone bill?


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## Evinrude58 (Jun 16, 2014)

So she got really drunk and started crying uncontrollably and the one thing on her mind was getting to go see her ex who she somehow knows still has feelings for her....
The only excuse she could find is “he knew my daddy”.

she’s a drinker, a cheater, and a liar. 
I think I would give her single status as well.
What a sad excuse for a wife.


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

Evinrude58 said:


> So she got really drunk and started crying uncontrollably and the one thing on her mind was getting to go see her ex who she somehow knows still has feelings for her....
> The only excuse she could find is “he knew my daddy”.
> 
> she’s a drinker, a cheater, and a liar.
> ...


It's definitely a dump her and run in the other direction


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## jjj858 (Jun 18, 2021)

Her getting drunk and crying may have been due to guilt that she’s been screwing her ex this whole time. She feels guilty and is trying to bring things into the light in some weird way by legitimizing their dalliances with this bs excuse about meeting to talk about her dead dad.


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## Trustless Marriage (Mar 1, 2021)

Maybe over the phone with you in the room but not in person. This is how affairs get started.


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## Evinrude58 (Jun 16, 2014)

I think the affair is already started. She’s literally crying about going to meet the guy.
He’s in her head. That’s all it takes.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Private investigator, polygraph.

This doesn't look too good.


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## CookieRookie (Aug 29, 2021)

Evinrude58 said:


> I think the affair is already started. She’s literally crying about going to meet the guy.
> He’s in her head. That’s all it takes.


He's in her head all right. And everywhere else too probably.


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## jsmart (Mar 14, 2015)

Evinrude58 said:


> I think the affair is already started. She’s literally crying about going to meet the guy.
> He’s in her head. That’s all it takes.


I totally agree. This is at the bare minimum, an EA. If he’s nearby, they may have already taken to PA. An affair with an ex goes sexual way faster than with other type of partners. These 2 already sexually familiar with each other. She is wanting to make the logistics of an affair easier. This has to be a hard H no. I bet if you look at her phone logs and social media, you will see this has been fotón far a while. With such a short marriage, you better prepare yourself to cut her loose. 

Also, don’t fall for the you’re being controlling bit. Tell her she’s free to go spend time with her ex just not as your wife.


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## Marc878 (Aug 26, 2015)

Disappeared. Hmmmm


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