# wife refuses to talk about our issues



## Really worried (Sep 8, 2009)

only things i can get from her is, Ive been a terrible husband for 14 years, and now I try to hard to be the perfect husband and it wont make up for the past. 


any advice ?


btw 
i dont go out, dont drink hardly at all, no porn, but I do take an occassional nap


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## RestlessInGeorgia (Dec 3, 2008)

It would really be more helpful if you gave us more information than just the "end product". What are the things she tells you that make you a horrible husband to her? Is there any validity in what she tells you? Is there any way she could've misconstrued things you have done in the past? Are you trying to do too much too quickly and she is just seeing it as surface changes that will not last?


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## Xusan (Nov 25, 2008)

Hello,

Some marriage books and programs suggest that you not address any issues until your marriage is on more stable ground. In the meantime, act in a loving manner towards your wife. Change/stop whatever behaviors you think have pushed your wife to this point, and read up on marriage how tos. This site is a great place to start. 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## preso (May 1, 2009)

Really worried said:


> only things i can get from her is, Ive been a terrible husband for 14 years, and now I try to hard to be the perfect husband and it wont make up for the past.
> 
> 
> any advice ?
> ...



It's hard to get past resentment in a relationship, once it sets in. Did you ask her specifically what events she is so resentful about? and what you can do to help her get past them?
Is she realisitc or does she just want to be mad? as some people love and thrive off drama.

so... are you allowing her to vent and trying to get to the specific issues that resulted in this?


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