# The Best Ways to Destroy a Marriage



## ThinkTooMuch (Aug 6, 2010)

Many of us post about our marriages falling apart, having been a member for almost two months and now an expert I think it would be useful to come up with a list of simple things he/she does that lead to the break.

Although I could go on and on I'll start with obvious ones:

Withhold sex

Don't say "I love you" when you come home

Don't greet your spouse with a hug when you come home

Ignore your spouse when you're both at home

Go out with friends, coworkers, several nights a week leaving spouse at home

Treat your spouse as one of your children - the dumb, ugly child.

Addictions of all sorts - computer, porn, drugs, alcohol

Added at 10:12 EDT 

If your vagina develops UTI's, tender areas, etc, after intercourse don't discuss this problem with a doctor. Instead don't have intercourse because you "hurt"


NEXT???


----------



## Hopeful1 (Aug 31, 2010)

Make something else (job, friends, hobbies, etc.) other than your spouse your priority.

Been there. Done that. Paying for it greatly now....


----------



## ThinkTooMuch (Aug 6, 2010)

Hopeful1 said:


> Make something else (job, friends, hobbies, etc.) other than your spouse your priority.
> 
> Been there. Done that. Paying for it greatly now....



Job and parents is what my spouse has done, I might be looking for a larger apartment in SF if I had been at the top of the list.

Mark


----------



## Hopeful1 (Aug 31, 2010)

Sucks, really -- for both the person who's been neglected and the person who did the neglecting. As the latter who's finally crawled out from under her rock, I've realized how much I've missed out on -- and for WHAT?! The job is JUST A JOB, not my life. And although I spent years trying to stick it out for the promises of more financial security for my family, it's brought me nothing but grief. In retrospect, I wish I had put 100% of that effort toward my husband, who certainly deserved it. He's giving me the chance (at least for now) to make up for my years of ass-backwardness. And I'm so grateful for this. I don't know if he will ever forgive me or get over his resentment toward me for my actions, or if our marriage will make it through this difficult time, but I'll spend as long as he'll let me trying to make it up to him. For BOTH of us.

For being an extremely intelligent woman, I was an absolutely blind IDIOT when it came to the "priority = marriage" lesson.


----------



## lance88 (Sep 19, 2010)

you know it is amazing or scary how many of the points in your "destroy a marriage" list i am doing right now. I don't know what to do. maybe, if i read enough of the posts on this site i can figure it out.


----------



## Susan2010 (Apr 19, 2010)

ThinkTooMuch said:


> Don't say "I love you" when you come home
> 
> Don't greet your spouse with a hug when you come home


Are you saying these are deal breakers for you, or are you saying there are people here who want to end their marriage for these reasons?


----------



## cherrypie18 (Feb 21, 2010)

ThinkTooMuch said:


> Many of us post about our marriages falling apart, having been a member for almost two months and now an expert I think it would be useful to come up with a list of simple things he/she does that lead to the break.
> 
> Although I could go on and on I'll start with obvious ones:
> 
> ...


In my case, mama's boy worshiping parents and letting them mistreat the spouse and come between the couple and not having the balls to do much about it = end of marriage.


----------



## Hopeful1 (Aug 31, 2010)

lance88 said:


> you know it is amazing or scary how many of the points in your "destroy a marriage" list i am doing right now. I don't know what to do. maybe, if i read enough of the posts on this site i can figure it out.


Lance88...Read on! Read on! Read on! I've been on this site now for only a couple of weeks but have learned more than I ever imagined. And I continue to learn each day -- not only through the advice of many folks who've "been there, done that" but also by reading the challenges and victories of others. Incredible insight and very supportive folks here... :smthumbup:


----------



## ThinkTooMuch (Aug 6, 2010)

Susan2010 said:


> Are you saying these are deal breakers for you, or are you saying there are people here who want to end their marriage for these reasons?


Susan,

When combined with an addiction to her PC, email, computer games, they are some of the reasons I'm splitting. The underlying message is one of rejection.

Mark


----------

