# How do I know if they did have sex



## Mad as hell (Aug 23, 2012)

My husband cheated and told me he never had sex with the OW, how do I proof that, this is really eating me.


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## Chris989 (Jul 3, 2012)

You can't. 

There is no way of proving it.

If you don't believe your husband there is probably a reason and you should maybe work on this as much as anything.


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## Eli-Zor (Nov 14, 2010)

Contact the OW's husband or significant other and compare notes or polygraph him , often the process leading to the polygraph reveals more. Those who are caught in an affair most often lie, deny, and lie some more. Do not believe what is said unless you can verify it.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Mad as hell (Aug 23, 2012)

Problem is that I don't know the OW's boyfriend, she hides him or she doesn't have one.


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## Torrivien (Aug 26, 2012)

Mad as hell said:


> Problem is that I don't know the OW's boyfriend, she hides him or she doesn't have one.


If it's really eating into you, you should try the polygraph test.
It will be as much of a proof that he didn't cheat (if he's telling the truth) than a proof of his goodwill on redemption.

If the polygraph shows he's lying, than at least you'll end this mental torture. Believe me dealing with the regret of knowing is much better than dealing with the doubt.


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## Eli-Zor (Nov 14, 2010)

Mad as hell said:


> Problem is that I don't know the OW's boyfriend, she hides him or she doesn't have one.


Then find her parents and expose her adultery to them, shake her little tree , let her feel the consequences of her affair and polygraph your husband . If he declines you have your answer, a question you must answer for yourself , what will you do if he declines or admits he has had sex 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Eli-Zor (Nov 14, 2010)

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/coping-infidelity/32002-welcome-tam-cwi-newbies-please-read.html

Read the thread above for guidance
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## lovelygirl (Apr 15, 2012)

Mad as hell said:


> My husband cheated and told me he never had sex with the OW, how do I proof that, this is really eating me.


How long has the affair been going?
What is he doing to make it up to you?
Did he give you reasons about why he cheated on you? 


It's hard to believe the affair hasn't gone physical. Polygraph him!


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## Torrivien (Aug 26, 2012)

Eli-Zor said:


> http://talkaboutmarriage.com/coping-infidelity/32002-welcome-tam-cwi-newbies-please-read.html
> 
> Read the thread above for guidance
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Thanks for the link, especially for the acronym I struggled to understand by context.


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## Shocker (Jul 26, 2012)

Chris989 said:


> You can't.
> 
> There is no way of proving it.
> 
> If you don't believe your husband there is probably a reason and you should maybe work on this as much as anything.


My wife held her secret for 9 months (that she actually had a physical encounter with someone) with me pleading\begging for the truth the whole time. Including putting her hand on the bible and lying.

I will say this...if you think something is very wrong it IS.


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

You should also get tested for STD's. If you have one, you'll know 

I am so sorry this is happening to you.


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