# Masturbation Anxiety???



## MountainRunner (Dec 30, 2014)

OK...Here goes...

I can't believe I'm posting this...As some of you know, I had set up a camera in my office so she could see that I'm there anytime she liked. She then expressed an interest in watching me masturbate for her. Wow! She really dug it! I was actually quite surprised regarding her enthusiasm. She flat out told me that she thought it was so "HOT".

Anyway, I did this quite a bit for her and really enjoyed her getting off on it. Now here's the strange thing...

She has asked if I would do it for her in her presence...and I'm hesitant. I honestly don't know if I can do it! I know, I know...I can do it with her viewing me on a cam, I can have her give me a hand job which is great, but to "take matters in to my own hands" while there is someone in the room watching me, I get anxious?? WTF?

I've always regarded masturbation as a private thing, and I think that is where I'm getting hung up.

Jeez...I have done a lot of things and I have no compunction about stripping for her, I've never suffered from performance anxiety with her or any other partners...but this is kinda different.

I'm thinking about asking her to "start me up" first and then I take over for her so she can watch and enjoy. Maybe that'll help me along.

Thoughts? Suggestions?


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## donny64 (Apr 21, 2012)

I've not had a problem with this if I'm close to someone. The W had never seen it before in person. The first time I did it, and for the first year or so, it was an incredible turn on for her. She'd watch and touch, then she just couldn't help herself and had to join in for a mutual masturbation session, or ending with a bj or intercourse. 

I've never really "hidden" solo masturbation from her. She's walked in quite a few times , through unlocked or open bedroom doors, to find me doing my thing. She'll say something like "WTF? Why didn't you come get me first?!!?" with a smile on her face.

A lot of fun! The thought of "getting caught" adds to it, as does the thought of unexpectedly walking in on the other one doing it. Though it has been very rare for me to catch her, though I know she's a 2 or 3 times a week girl. 

Having said that, the excitement of it has fizzled somewhat over the years. She likes to be there, but not the turn on it once was for her. I now wish we'd have done so a little more sparingly to keep the mystery level up. 

Do it. Have a hell of a lot of fun with it. But don't overdo it so it then becomes common or stale.


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## Fozzy (Jul 20, 2013)

It's pretty f'd up how social taboos can stick with us, even when we think we're past them. There's a lot of shaming that goes on over masturbation. Even when it's not overt shaming, we pick up cues about it from those around us and internalize them.

Truth be told, I'd probably have a hard time with it too.


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## Holland (Aug 20, 2012)

Man up....................

lol I've always wanted to say that on TAM >

So here is my serious advice, see if she will get into some mutual MB with you lying next to each other, dim lights if necessary. It is a nice, comfy way to ease into MB for each other.


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## Fozzy (Jul 20, 2013)

Or paint a bullseye on her chest and try to hit it from across the bed! Like playing Quarters!


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## CatJayBird (Oct 5, 2015)

I suggest starting with you both pleasuring your own selves next to each other. That is seriously HOT!!!! My h and I have done this starting sitting up facing each other with our legs intertwined...then lie back and get to town.

Good luck...have fun with it!!

Oh and once you get going......all hesitation is lost because you are distracted by other things...


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## jorgegene (May 26, 2012)

I admit, ive never done it in front of a single soul, and I dont think I want to.

call me a 'scaredy cat'


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## jorgegene (May 26, 2012)

Funny though, if I needed to spuce up the sex life and she asked, I'd consider it.

but right now were doing fine, dont need to.


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## MountainRunner (Dec 30, 2014)

Holland said:


> So here is my serious advice, see if she will get into some mutual MB with you lying next to each other, dim lights if necessary. It is a nice, comfy way to ease into MB for each other.


that's what I'm kinda thinkin' too @Holland ...Like I said, have her "start me up" and then I take over and finish for her.


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## woundedwarrior (Dec 9, 2011)

Fozzy said:


> Or paint a bullseye on her chest and try to hit it from across the bed! Like playing Quarters!


That is hilarious & that image just made my day. Too funny!!!!!!


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## header (Nov 14, 2015)

The bullseye is the right idea.

Don't just lay there next to her or in front of her doing your thing.

She has to get involved- either she grabs your balls or ass, or just smiles and looks up at you as you blow all over her.

Still counts as masturbation.


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## UMP (Dec 23, 2014)

mountainrunner, 
You gotta do this. Maybe you could put some porn on to help you along.
I repeat, you GOTTA do this!

You'll be so glad you did.


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## Oldmatelot (Mar 28, 2011)

Go for it. Turns my wife on when I do this for her. 
Not routinely. Just an infrequent event.


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## Redheadguy (Jul 30, 2014)

My Wife has asked to watch. The idea gets me insanely hot, and scared at the same time, and I have communicated this to her. We have tried and made progress a few times, her starting off with some help and then me taking over, me starting and her finishing. I'm slowly coming around from the hangups, but dang are they powerful. I want her to join in too, the side by side and sitting facing each other comment above is getting my mind spinning.


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## JamesTKirk (Sep 8, 2015)

I think watching can be sexy. I think the way you can get past your anxiety is to get her involved.
Tell her you'd like to look at her while you masturbate and ask her to dress in something sexy (or undress, which eve you prefer) and tease you. For her to be the object of your masturbation fantasy. Ask her to verbally tell her how it turns you on while you do it and explain to you what she likes about it. I would definitely start off with kissing and petting before putting on the show unless she's trying for something totally hands-off.

I've never just masturbated for her. I have finished myself off with her, or done it before having sex. I get kind of dirty minded about it like "Yeah, check this out. You like this, don't you!" (in my mind) whatever works to get you turned on and past the performance anxiety.

I would also suggest wine. 
I hope you can find a way to dig down deep and grab those nuts. That's super sexy. I wish my wife asked me to masturbate for her. I'm actually trying to get mine to want to watch me masturbate when I'm too horny and she's not in the mood. If I'm going to have to do it myself, I think it would be hot for her to watch it.


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## FizzBomb (Dec 31, 2013)

I think this is a smoking hot idea. I think that having your wife dressed in her (or your) favourite sexy outfit sitting in front of you or lying next to you to help get you started would definitely help proceedings along. BTW, have you done it yet? I just noticed the date you started this thread and it was a few days ago.


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