# CWI...We're Just Here to Help



## SomedayDig (Jul 17, 2012)

Coping with Infidelity is the title of this portion of the Talk About Marriage forum. When you come in here, you're gonna find both Betrayed Spouses and Wayward Spouses. When you're a newbie at this place you're gonna be in for a whirlwind of a ride.

For me, I am a Betrayed Spouse. My wife, Regret214, cheated on me in a physical affair for 5 long years. I am the one who discovered it and it was probably the worst experience of my LIFE! Even after 4 months of working toward reconciliation, it was difficult to read some of the responses here to Regret and me and many times I just wanted to delete my profile and say "the Hell with this place".

I'm glad I didn't cuz I have learned so much from everyone here. Even the ones who I didn't agree with their advice, I still took something away from a comment.

If you're a Wayward Spouse this place can be brutal. I've read Regret's first thread she started last April. She got beat up pretty badly. There are plenty of other WS on this board who got beat up and remained here. They continue to give sound advice and give most any BS some kind of insight to their situation.

In the end it doesn't matter what side of the infidelity coin you're on ~ this place delivers open and honest advice. 

Even when you don't want to hear it.

As we come up on our 1 year anniversary of Dday, I'd like to thank everyone who has given me any sort of advice since being here. I can sometimes come off a bit harsh (been to banned camp to prove it), but I can promise you my heart is in the right place. Thanks TAM.


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## AngryandUsed (Jun 23, 2011)

Bad to be in your place.
Good for BS to be in this place!


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## daisygirl 41 (Aug 5, 2011)

Well said Dig,
Might I also add that as a BS you can also expect so e brutal and honest advice on here. Some of the advice I received was damn harsh, and I fought it for a while, but in the end those 2x4 posters were spot on! We all get there in our own time but those who don't take the advice from ones who have been through and who are still CWI really need to look deep and long as to why they are resisting said advice!
I'm nearly 2 years from Dday 1 and a year from Dday 2. Been working in R since last march. It's a tough road but it would have been so much harder without you all here!

Dig - hope the approaching Dday anniversary isn't too brutal for you. H and I reclaimed the day and made some new happy memories in place of those bad ones! Good luck!
DG

Oh and just for the record
YOU CAN'T NICE SOMEONE OUT OF AN AFFAIR - FACT!! : - )
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Hardtohandle (Jan 10, 2013)

Things like this really need to be a sticky.


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## SomedayDig (Jul 17, 2012)

A&U...yes, it absolutely sucks to be here. I've worked through a lot of my anger towards Regret about putting us in this stupid f'ng situation. How brutally selfish.

DG...today is exactly 11 months. I don't know how I'm gonna feel a month from today. I've actually wondered if I should ask Regret to take a personal day off work. I just don't know if that's what I'm gonna need.

HtH...thanks for the compliment, but sometimes I don't know if it's better that WS/BS have this as a sticky. I mean, on one hand - yes, it would be good for them to see what this place is before they even post. On the other hand it is truly a growing experience to go through the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.


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## daisygirl 41 (Aug 5, 2011)

Sometimes the lead up to anniversaries such as these are worse than the actual day. I was dreading our Dday anniversary but the closer I got the more determined I was to not let it define us and to make some new happy memories on that day and it worked for us.
Does Regret have to give much notice for a holiday day? I would definitely keep this as an option. It would be good for you to spend that day together. You can support each other and make some new memories.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## SomedayDig (Jul 17, 2012)

No, she can literally call in for a substitute the night before if need be. We have definitely begun making new memories and to be honest, an entirely new intimate life. One that I know she has never shared with anyone else


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## JCD (Sep 2, 2012)

Isn't banned camp a rite of passage here? I got my pink slip.


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## SomedayDig (Jul 17, 2012)

I think it is JCD. I was told mine was pretty special because ChrisH himself banned me!! LMAO


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## SomedayDig (Jul 17, 2012)

Come to think of it, JCD...it was actually supposed to be a permanant ban, but thanks to Almostrecovered who went on an email campaign with the mod team, it was reduced to 3 weeks.


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## JCD (Sep 2, 2012)

SomedayDig said:


> Come to think of it, JCD...it was actually supposed to be a permanant ban, but thanks to Almostrecovered who went on an email campaign with the mod team, it was reduced to 3 weeks.


:smnotworthy:

I bow to your expertise. Mine was only two weeks and I annoyed a new poster who didn't like my description of her attitude. Heck, breathing wrong can do that...

Hmm...I've been called unrepentent before...might be a grain of truth there...


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## life101 (Nov 18, 2012)

How do I get banned? I demand to know it now! :banhim:


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## zillard (Nov 13, 2012)

I wish my stbxw would have come here.


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