# Hello, so tired...



## PatienceOut (Sep 21, 2018)

I have been reading some of these forums for awhile, specifically the infidelity and thinking about divorce ones. I am planning to post to the former since I am fairly sure I have just caught my spouse in another affair. 

I have 5 kids with this man, have been with him since I was 19 (him 20), our entire adult lives have been together. I am so tired of looking for evidence and being suspicious and feel like I am growing bitter and resentful of him for putting me through all of this. 
I really don't know which way I want to go. I know I want my marriage to be better, and I don't want my kids to be affected by a divorce. 

I feel like I'm at a crossroads. 

Thanks for letting me vent.


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## NorseViking (Apr 14, 2018)

Try the coping infidelity subforum...


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

PatienceOut said:


> I have been reading some of these forums for awhile, specifically the infidelity and thinking about divorce ones. I am planning to post to the former since I am fairly sure I have just caught my spouse in another affair.
> 
> I have 5 kids with this man, have been with him since I was 19 (him 20), our entire adult lives have been together. I am so tired of looking for evidence and being suspicious and feel like I am growing bitter and resentful of him for putting me through all of this.
> I really don't know which way I want to go. I know I want my marriage to be better, and I don't want my kids to be affected by a divorce.
> ...


You know what you should do I doubt we can tell you more. Stop thinking of it as a making a decision and more about learning to be courageous and confronting your fear.


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

Come back and post more details such as your ages and details about his previous affairs etc and people will then be able to offer more specific advice and insight. 

I will address a couple of your points in bold below.




PatienceOut said:


> I have been reading some of these forums for awhile, specifically the infidelity and thinking about divorce ones. I am planning to post to the former since I am fairly sure I have just caught my spouse in another affair.
> 
> *What is your evidence and what are the details of his previous affair(s)? The fact that this is not his first is very damming much less likely that he will ever be fully invested in the marriage or that you will ever have any trust, love or confidence in him again. *
> 
> ...


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