# Disabled and Retired-but Wife want$$..



## Galt (Dec 30, 2011)

I was disabled some years ago, and have since retired on normal Social Security. The disability checks were a little more than what I am getting now, after being converted to “retired” status.

My wife has been strongly complaining that my income is simply insufficient for us (her) to live on, after the reduction in the check amounts, and has been threatening to divorce me if I don’t go back to work in spite of my disability which is still with me. Perhaps I _could_ get a job, and do it, but it would certainly not be easy.

I have carefully explained to her, complete with a “spreadsheet”, that we can live a decent life together-and not deny ourselves any thing really important-based only upon the retirement and a small income from a few investments. She insists, though, that she was “raised to live better than that.”

Perhaps I should not have mentioned it, but I also remarked to her that, under Texas “Community Property Law“, only one-half of my future earned income would accrue directly to me, with the rest being, by law, hers. I said something to the effect that “I refuse to work for only half of the going wage for my field, less also any pay cut I have to take due to my disability.”

The last word she said to me was that if I don’t “shape-up” she will divorce me and get at least one-half of the house, after which I will then be forced to get my wheelchair to a job somewhere, if I wish to continue to eat and have a roof over my head. I am afraid that, if she has already made such threats, any additional assets I may acquire-as a result of going back to work-will simply provide that much more motivation for her to divorce me in order to seize them through “Community Property” law in a “no-fault“ divorce!


Need Advice Badly!


----------



## Zzyzx (Aug 24, 2011)

IANAL nor do I live in TX. But I will offer a couple of tidbits that you can research for your state:

In many states, a retired person cannot be compelled to return to work to provider higher support to the ex-spouse so if you get divorced, you likely can't be made to give up more than half the SS. Well that's bad enough. But read further, it may not be all bad.

You did not indicate whether she is retirement age too. Does she have SS of her own? If yes, that may reduce your obligation to some extent. You're entitled to half of hers if she has any.

And you did not indicate if she is working. If not, then she will have to work to supplement what she would get from you in order to get to the lifestyle she wants. Further, she will find that the dating and marriage market for women her age and temperament is going to be rather dry. That might give her pause.


----------



## calif_hope (Feb 25, 2011)

What's up with her........does she need a new BROOM????

If she divorces you and takes the 1/2 community property her lifestyle will drop and yours may increase. Texas has considerations in the books for disabled individuals in these matters, talk to the SSN, Texas social workers, and a divorce lawyer, many give a free hour. Don't operate or make decisions without the facts.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

You are of retirement age.

Is your wife also of retirement age?

How long have the two of you been married to each other?

You need to look up your state’s divorce laws… For example Texas, for instance, limits alimony to 3 years and $2,500 per month maximum. I doubt that even if you worked if the alimony you would pay would be anywhere near the $2,500.

You will not have to give up half of your SS to her if you divorce. Instead she can file and get her part as your wife. But your SS cannot be touched.

Does your wife work outside the home? If not why not? 

Point out to here that if she divorces you, her standard of living will drop to less than ½ of what it is now. She’s a fool to think that divorce will improve her situation.


----------



## Galt (Dec 30, 2011)

> You are of retirement age.
> 
> Is your wife also of retirement age?
> 
> How long have the two of you been married to each other?


34 years. This is certainly enough to have “marriage ‘heavy‘” in Texas.



> You need to look up your state’s divorce laws… For example Texas, for instance, limits alimony to 3 years and $2,500 per month maximum. I doubt that even if you worked if the alimony you would pay would be anywhere near the $2,500.


I know that this is how it’s supposed to work, but there are exceptions; if she becomes disabled while receiving alimony, for example. 

Yes, I have looked up my state’s divorce laws, and can only say that they are bewilderingly confused and self-contradictory. One section of the Texas Family Code, for example, goes on at some length regarding the rules for “distribution” of Community Property, stressing most emphatically that “All property is presumed to be Community, unless the party wishing to claim Separate Property can prove, to a standard ‘almost equal to the Criminal Standard’ that it is not Community.” Another section of this Code declares that, “The Judge in a Family Court has complete discretion regarding the distribution of assets in a divorce, and must make a finding which is just and right.” (Go figure!)

As if the above were not crazy enough, Texas now also has an “overlay” of “Equitable Division” law _ on top of_ this Community Property statute and, supposedly, this results in Community Property-based division being the “starting point” in the property phase of a divorce (Go figure some more!)




> You will not have to give up half of your SS to her if you divorce. Instead she can file and get her part as your wife. But your SS cannot be touched.


I will need all of it plus the small income I get from my investments . These are the only things that keep me going at the moment. I believe that she is not yet old enough to get my SS. I think the age for this is supposed to be at least 58, and she is 54



> Does your wife work outside the home? If not why not?


She does, but she spends all of her income on clothes, shoes, trips to Vegas and other goodies. I have to pay for everything else.



> Point out to her that if she divorces you, her standard of living will drop to less than ½ of what it is now. She’s a fool to think that divorce will improve her situation.


Yes, that may be true, but there is the little matter of the Community Property I mentioned. 

I guess all I can do is throw money at lawyers and hope for the best! 



Thanks to all for the replies and help!


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Galt said:


> I will need all of it plus the small income I get from my investments . These are the only things that keep me going at the moment. I believe that she is not yet old enough to get my SS. I think the age for this is supposed to be at least 58, and she is 54


Well, she still cannot get any of your SS. That is not divisible in divorce. You can check with an attorney but that is my understanding of who SS is handled in all states in divorce.
Are from funds other than income you two earned while you were married: prior savings? Inheritance? Etc? If so you might very well be able to get an attorney to protect those for you.


Galt said:


> She does, but she spends all of her income on clothes, shoes, trips to Vegas and other goodies. I have to pay for everything else.


What percentage of your joint income does she earn? Is her income higher than your SS? If so she might have to pay you spousal support. When you figure in your income from investments, what percentage is her income?
If she divorces you, she will most likely have to live on her income alone. So if this is about her wanting more money… she’s going to end up with a lot less to live on. Surely she can do the math.


Galt said:


> Yes, that may be true, but there is the little matter of the Community Property I mentioned.


Yes, but she will still only get half. And thus her life style will be cut in half. She will need to live off of her income instead of blowing it for her own enjoyment.


Galt said:


> I guess all I can do is throw money at lawyers and hope for the best!


Is she actually going to file or is she just carrying on a lot. Have you discussed with her that her standard of living will be cut in half?


----------

