# Depression/anxierty in a relationship.



## bob1471 (Dec 27, 2013)

Following on from my last thread.

Anyone else get and it affects relationship? Over the years, I've had tons of it. Mostly nothing to do with my relationship and I know in the past my head has really led me down the path a bit with stupid thoughts etc. When I'm bad Im just really not myself its scary.

Yeh over the years I know its affected the way I think about the relationship. Those of you know depression/anxoety will know your thought patterns can get extreme etc (paranoia, catastrphising, overthinking).

I know maybe some of my posts make it look like I make excuses. It just scares me that sometimes how I think about things might just be me. I just cant tell.

and yes it gets mentioned that it must be bad to create an account on her and post to strangers.

Over the years I've had a few acccounts on here. Always start a new one for fresh start.

I always seem to focus and worry. Sometimes in the past we've had bad spells but then its been good. Sometimes in my head I guess also....


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## melw74 (Dec 12, 2013)

I do.

I have suffered depression and anxiety for 16 years. It all started when i was carrying my third child and i am not going to lie some days are hell.

My worse problem is over thinking, It makes me so tired some days, I can wake up at 7 and by 9 i am so tired i just want to go back to bed.

My anxiety is mainly health anxiety, Its horrible and i would not want to wish it on anyone.

You see my husband is the total opposite to me, hes never lets anything worry, or bother him, hes always smiling and joking i envy that. Its also hard when you have 5 children to a husband and yourself to look after.

I try not to let it affect my marriage, or my life, but its so god dam hard, and the worse thing is that most of the time i just keep it bottled up, I smile and pretend i am feeling fine, I mean do not get me wrong some days are better than others, but not a day goes by when i am not worrying about something. The worse thing is when those thoughts take over and its the first thing you think of when you wake up and the first thing you think of going to bed.

I would love to have no cares in the world. My husband has never worried or been anxious... if only.


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## bob1471 (Dec 27, 2013)

Mel, Know it. Been here.

My anxiety seems to jump from place to place. I start working new place (I do contract stuff), Im stupidly stressed about it for weeks. Then I get used to it a few weeks later so anxiety finds an outlet somewhere else. I'll stress about my relationship if there are slught problems there.

ITs just impossible to tell whats real. I KNOW stressing about new job is not normal (ok its normal a little but not like I do believe me) but I cant figure out if its normal the way I stress about my relationship.

I do often wonder if there are problems that are real (like its normal for everyone to be a little anxious at a new job) but my mind magnifies...

It seems my head always looks for something to stress over!


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## Orange_Pekoe (Jan 5, 2015)

I'm so glad I read this thread.
While I was living with my husband (and the rest of my in laws in 1 house) I eventually developed anxiety and probably depression too. Nothing that was diagnosed, but you don't need to go to a doctor to know something is wrong with you. I needed to either get out of that toxic environment, or I'd eventually have a complete nervous breakdown.

So I did. And I'm so glad. This is a reminder that bad feelings (caused by a toxic environment) can erode your health over time and become full-blown depression and I put a stop to that by removing myself from the environment.

Now that I don't live there anymore, I don't feel depressed. I'm sad that my marriage is ending...but I'm not depressed. I wake up and I'm grateful for what I have and try to focus on the good.

If I had stayed, I'm VERY sure that I'd eventually have reached the point where the depression would not have gone away even if I did leave the environment. It would have become irreversible. Even now, I exhibit signs of PTSD, I dwell often on what happened, argue with them in my head, etc. but it's getting better.

<3


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## melw74 (Dec 12, 2013)

bob1471 said:


> Mel, Know it. Been here.
> 
> My anxiety seems to jump from place to place. I start working new place (I do contract stuff), Im stupidly stressed about it for weeks. Then I get used to it a few weeks later so anxiety finds an outlet somewhere else. I'll stress about my relationship if there are slught problems there.
> 
> ...


 Its so horrible. I always say " why me" but then i realise i am not the only one, and that there are others out there going through the same thing. I do not wish it on anyone.

Me to i go from one thing to another stress about this and stress about that.


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