# Husband dating while separated



## svarner (Oct 7, 2016)

We separated in September after 9 years together. We have a three year old together. He immediately started dating around and eventually found a girl who is going through a separation as well. They have been together for three months. Up until two weeks ago he has had nothing to do with our son. He hasn't helped me with even a penny. Suddenly he has begun to talk with him a couple nights a week and see him once or twice. He now wants our son to meet his girlfriend who also has a little boy who is three years old. I have full custody of our son and it says that he is not allowed to meet anyone that we are dating unless it has been exclusive for six months. I said this to him and he seems content to wait which is great. I really don't want to meet the new girl yet let alone let our son meet her. I'm probably getting ahead of myself but I can't imagine another woman in my child's life right now. I feel like it's too soon. I know it's going to happen eventually, but how do I cope with this?He's only three but it's obvious that he is confused about where daddy has been. Idk how to feel about anything. Also, my ex keeps saying things like he never wanted a divorce and the only reason we did is because of his father. He never made an ounce of effort once the word divorce was put on the table. I feel like he is all about keeping up with appearances. Also, why I think he is suddenly trying to be in his sons life. I feel like his gf was starting to notice. I am mainly on here to vent. Sorry for my long rant.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Who put the word 'divorce' on the table? You or him?

Why does he suddenly want to see your son? Because the other woman is pushing him to do so. I've seen this before, they push the guy to build the impression that there is a new family.

One thing to keep in mind that the chances of this relationship of his lasting very long is very small. 

You say that you have custody. Has a divorce been filed? Why isn't he paying any child support? Wasn't that part of the custody agreement?


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## svarner (Oct 7, 2016)

He put divorce of the table. The funny thing is that he could never say it's what he wanted. He only danced around the idea but after a few weeks of being elsewhere I told him he could either tell me what he was feeling or I am coming to an assumption. All I got from him was I'm sorry but I've never had to break up with someone before. His parents finalized their divorce the same week. Everything was unexpected to me. I didn't add child custody into the agreement because at the time he didn't have a job. He was living in a house with 5 guys and it wasn't an ideal situation. The home was raided. He went through a serious tough patch in the beginning and I filed for full custody which he signed over no questions. I didn't include child support because I knew he was worried about it and I just wanted him to sign over custody with everything going on. He is now living with his mom which is better. Since he has started dated this girl he has seemed more level headed than when he first left. My lawyer told me I could go back and ask for child support. He keeps saying he's going to help, but it's been six months and nothing.


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## svarner (Oct 7, 2016)

Also, we have to be separated for a year before divorce. That will take place this coming up September


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

So your divorce is final? Is that right?

Is he working now and does he have an income?


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