# Women and their dogs



## Cooper (Apr 18, 2008)

Before I get hung from the highest tree let me preface this message by saying I love dogs, I've always had them and always considered them part of the family. Hell, I miss my little Winnie more than my ex wife.

Since I have been single I have dated enough women to see a trend where they use their dogs to fill a void in their lives. Nothing wrong with that to a degree, hard to find a more loving and devoted companion than a good dog. But some women (and maybe men?) take it to the extreme. One thing that really bugs me is when I pick a date up and she has to french kiss the dogs before she leaves, we all know where their tongues have been!

I was invited over for dinner last night by my friend ----- who I am very interested in, this was the first time we had this kind of date. She has three large dogs (and a cat) and they run the house, they never stopped jumping and licking, the condition of her house was appalling, dog and cat hair covered (and I mean covered!) all the furniture and carpets, the floor was littered with chewed up "stuff". You couldn't sit down without one or two of the dogs crawling on top of you, and she did yell at them about 500 times but it did nothing. And the licking just never stopped, as I watched the dogs lick her face I just kept thinking every time I've kissed her I was getting sloppy seconds! I didn't even think about trying to get romantic with her, how could I compete with all those other tongues? (poor taste joke, sorry) 

Maybe I've become a germ-a-phope but I just get really turned off by this. 

Now that I've written this I'm not sure what I was hoping to accomplish but will post it anyway. I know people are different and live their lives differently and that's what dating is about, trying to find someone with similar life philosophies. I just had such high hopes for ------ and find I miss her already even though I haven't told her I don't see how we can go further. Maybe I could make a rule that she needs to come to my house first and take a shower before we go out...........(kidding) 

And the search goes on.......


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

LOL....and the search continues. I'm an animal lover too, but I understand where you are coming from. My brother has a couple of dogs and the scenario is similar to what you encountered. No one wants to get in the farm trucks because they smell of "dog" and are covered in hair. We can't refer to them as dogs--we are to call them "kids". Thanksgiving was interesting with them as well. My brother brought both of them to Thanksgiving dinner at my mother's house. And yes they had to have their plates too. Before the day ended, one of them ended up in my lap--yep all 40 pounds of pure canine. I also had to endure the face licking. At least I got to go home afterwards to my nice quiet cats. I couldn't imagine tolerating the Thanksgiving experience on a daily basis. I don't blame you from bailing on that relationship. I'm sure that lady and her canines come as a package deal. lol


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

My ex ran an animal shelter, complete with a host of volunteers. I noticed rather quickly that the most fanatic animal lovers also tended to be people who had difficulties with adult human relationships. I love animals, but they don't take precedence over humans. We have dogs in the house but they don't run the house and they aren't allowed to ruin it. We don't kiss them on the mouth, dress them up like little humans, etc. I don't completely trust anyone who absolutely hates dogs or kids but I also wouldn't get hooked up with an animal fanatic, either.


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## Cooper (Apr 18, 2008)

Hey 827AUG, how's tricks? Hope you had a nice Thanksgiving and things are going well for you. 

One piece of info I left out is she's also another one of those horsey girls, you would think I would know better by know.lol She is a great gal, smart, stable, attractive, has her own business, financially secure, likes country living, we have a great connection and enjoy each others company. I really don't want to stop seeing her, just not sure how to get past the sloppy seconds! I know she's lonely but as Unbelievable said, the dogs need to know their place, and have manners! 

NoLongerSad, you really need to explain what you mean, that statement sounds like it should come with a story!


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

Naturally, a "horsey" girl would be stable. LOL


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## Cooper (Apr 18, 2008)

Unbelievable, you too! First 827Aug and now you! I'm surrounded by horsey women, how can I ever trust any of your suggestions again? I'm doomed!


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

Cooper,

I'd jump at a chance with a "horsey" woman. Anyone willing to spend hours grooming a horse and mucking stalls would likely take care of a man quite nicely. You gotta love a woman who's into pickup trucks, blue jeans, skinny dipping, and who has easy access to a hay loft.


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

unbelievable said:


> I don't completely trust anyone who absolutely hates dogs or kids but I also wouldn't get hooked up with an animal fanatic, either.


It's all about balance. Your statement definitely has merit. That's something my parents and grandparents always said too. The flip side also has merit; there must be something wrong with a person's character, if the family dog doesn't approve of him/her. So, at least we know the gal's dogs approve of Cooper. Congrats Cooper! lol



unbelievable said:


> I'd jump at a chance with a "horsey" woman. Anyone willing to spend hours grooming a horse and mucking stalls would likely take care of a man quite nicely. You gotta love a woman who's into pickup trucks, blue jeans, skinny dipping, and who has easy access to a hay loft.


I'll keep this in mind.  Yes, and we even make a wonderful organic garden with all that horse manure in addition to the attributes you mentioned. However, my estranged husband said us horsey women could be intimidating. We castrate most of our male foals. And we can easily handle (& sometimes discipline) a 1,000 pound animal.


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

NoLongerSad said:


> Kissing their dogs is the least of it.


As Paul Harvey used to say, "And here's the rest of story". I'm like Cooper on this one--there's got to be a story to go along with this statement.......And we're all ears!


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

Cooper,

Glad you had a nice Thanksgiving. Mine was nice (despite my brother's "kids"). Even with the turmoil in my life, I still had plenty to be thankful for. Unfortunately things have gotten worse. I will spare you the details; some of the things are beyond believe. Heck, I even have lawyers volunteering their services because of the sheer entertainment value. 

Just for you....I have taken the llama avatar down and replaced it with the horse one. Us horse women will keep you guessing. You don't stand a chance! Fortunately the horses have to stay outside. The cats are working out great for me inside. Anytime anyone comes over to our house, they hide. And they don't come out until the coast is clear. I wonder if this lady's dogs could learn that trick?! Perhaps you could make that suggestion. lol Seriously though, I really don't think she is interested in changing that. Either you accept the dogs as they are, or you move on. My brother gets down right angry, if someone even suggest he leave his dogs at home--or treat them as canines. They are "kids" and he isn't going to change anything. This woman is probably going to be the same way. Wish you the best with this delicate subject!


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## Cooper (Apr 18, 2008)

All I can say is I'm smart enough not to pick a fight when I'm out numbered two to one! But I will say this, I was married to a horsey woman for many years and I don't think I was ever very high on her list of priorities. 
All kidding aside I do seem to be attracted to capable women, and for the most part horsey women are a pretty capable bunch. Hay lofts, strong legs, man, what the hell do I care about a few dog kisses!


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## Cooper (Apr 18, 2008)

Gee thanks for my own special avator 827Aug, I'm touched  I don't think horses will ever be out of my life. I also went out with ----- on Friday night and guess where we ended up? In the barn icing her horses legs because he got loose and into the grain and ate so much she's afraid of him foundering (sp?), just like old times for me. I will admit to missing the horses some here at home, three empty stalls and two empty pastures is kind of a sad sight. 


827Aug you sure are a person of courage, I can only imagine what you are going through knowing some of what you have already dealt with. You always maintain a positive attitude and sense of humor, sometimes the only weapon against adversity but also so easy to lose focus on. It will all be behind you at some point, never lose sight of that. 

Cooper


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## Atholk (Jul 25, 2009)

Good grief horses are a lot of work. Just not for me sorry lol.


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## sisters359 (Apr 9, 2009)

Well, if it is worth the risk, tell her what you have said here (in shorter form). There will be no going forward if you don't. Of course, saying it could bring everything to a screeching halt--but it sounds like you are kind of at that point anyway, so what have you got to lose? I cannot imagine that a person like her would be able/willing to change as much as you'd need, but again, what have you got to lose? She may have no desire to change--and the two of you will decide you just aren't a match. Or maybe she'll say that she realizes how bad it's gotten and she'd like to try to change. BUT if she's only changing to try to please you--if she doesn't think things are really out of control--then be wary, b/c the changes may not stick or they may lead her to feel resentment (although a neater house and better behaved dogs are unlikely to produce resentment).


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## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

i think you'll have to walk away from this one cooper. you'll never be able to compete with those dogs


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## Scannerguard (Jan 26, 2010)

LOL.

What a timely subject as I have the interest of a "Horsey girl" and she has 2 yappy dogs in her house, who are a pain in the rear, when I have spent the night (no sex - complicated, I use her house when I am taking call at a local hospital). I have to say this is more of an issue than you may know.

My last gf's dog used to get all worked up when we were having sex. Not sure if the dog thought I was hurting her but you know what? It was a pain in the rear and spoiled the moment a couple of few times.

I am starting to conclude - you want a pet? Fine. You want a man? Fine. But the two may not intersect, LOL.

What gets me is you would think this "horsey girl" would have "farm dogs", you know. . .the ones who are kind of medium or big sized and are docile and outdoorsy and take a nap beside the fireplace and all.

No, she's got the yappy lap dogs who just want to kick across the room, no matter how much of an animal lover you are.

And before the bleeding heart liberals from PETA criticize me for being an animal hater, I say:

1. I love animals. I eat them on my plate everyday.
2. I do actually like dogs that know their place like a country dog. They sleep on the porch or laundry room and are permitted in the house but stay on the floor, family room only, no bedroom.


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

Scannerguard said:


> What gets me is you would think this "horsey girl" would have "farm dogs", you know. . .the ones who are kind of medium or big sized and are docile and outdoorsy and take a nap beside the fireplace and all.


Interesting observation. From the time I was 16, I usually kept an Australian Shepherd around. My last Aussie got killed by a car four years ago. And I just haven't bothered to get another one. Anyway, my dogs spent most of the time outside. Then when they did come inside, the kind of behavior you and Cooper are describing wasn't allowed. I'm in agreement; I can't stand the little yapping dogs either. Now that I think about it--almost all of the women at the horse shows have working bred dogs. I rarely see any of the little yapping dogs there. They probably wouldn't last long either. lol Let's hope the horsey women you and Cooper have found are in the minority. Geesh, they are going to ruin it for the rest of us horsey women....


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## swedish (Mar 6, 2008)

Cooper,

I have to agree with everything you stated in your post, except the part where you say you are kidding. I found the same when dating, that a lot of single men had dogs & I just can't do the furry animal living in the house thing ... and even watching tv where a dog is licking someone's mouth makes me turn my head and dry heave ... yuck!

In the end, I was lucky to find my h who feels the same way


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## Cooper (Apr 18, 2008)

My friends dogs are no little yappy puff balls, all three are over 60 pounds each, yellow lab, Shepard mix and bull terrier mix. Way to big to be the lap dogs they think they are!

I'm not going to say anything to her about the dogs or the condition of her house. She told me when she was married her husband never allowed the dogs in most parts of the house so maybe this is just a way for her to exercise some independence. If she's happy and content with things at home who am I to ask her to change? We've talked about how being single lets you live by your own rules and schedule, and we both are enjoying that freedom.


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

So, Cooper....Are you and the dog lady going out again this weekend? Hope things work out for you.


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## Cooper (Apr 18, 2008)

Well my friend funny you should ask! I just got off the phone with her and no we're not going out this weekend but made plans for next weekend. I have to admit to being a little smitten with this gal and I figure the dogs can't live forever right?


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

Cooper said:


> and I figure the dogs can't live forever right?


Well, how old are they? Hmmmm.....and you are in good health?! lol Just make sure they are spayed and neutered and I think you stand a chance with that plan.


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## turtle10 (Dec 2, 2010)

ive got horses and dogs. and some dog hair that i wish would go away! but in all honesty....i think its two things : 1) she is talking and nobody(pups) is listening and 2) this is the start of something you are building in your life....NOW is the time to speak ur mind. 
i dated a guy (before my 14 year failing marriage) that FINALLY agreed to get a dog. we did. but he didnt like her. and in ALL honesty, when i got honest with myself, i left him because I knew he would never be the 'dog person' i needed....and that doesnt mean living in filth at all.
balance.
best of luck


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## Cooper (Apr 18, 2008)

One of her dogs is old but the other two are only a few years old so they probably have a good ten years of life in them. So I have this ten year plan........ 

Turtle you are right about balance and I think that's what she has lost focus on, or maybe never had, who knows. 

I'm normally a pretty direct guy but with her I've been walking a little softly for a couple of reasons. Her and I actually have a little history, back when we were all married I sold her and her husband a horse trailer, they lived right around the corner, (that's a country corner so maybe a half mile). I ran into them here and there over the years and then fall of 2009 I ran into her and she told me they were divorced, she bought out his share of the house so we're still neighbors. (which is really convenient!)
Since I always like to be on good terms with my neighbors I'm not going to do or say anything to upset her.

Another thing is when she talks about her ex some of the things she criticizes about him are the same behaviors I exhibited during my marriage. Things like being critical, rigid, and overly structured. I wasn't happy that way but everything was spinning out of control in our marriage and I was always "on guard" trying to keep ahead of things. Makes me sound terrible doesn't it? Remember the whole story is in the details....... 

In reality as much as I like her and enjoy her company I never see us becoming a day to day couple. For now we get together and enjoy each others company and then return to our respective lives, and neither of us are pushing for more. Being older and wiser definitely gives you a clearer perspective and helps keep those hormones in check!


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## Ladybugs (Oct 12, 2010)

Cooper,

I can relate to how you feel...at my own peril I admit I was once jealous of a boyfriends dog- he would talk baby talk to her alot, i love dogs too but if me and her were in teh same room it was like she came first..i didnt want to admit it to myself but i found myself feeling a competetion with this dog..but otoh he gave me reason to..he had her for a long time while he had been single


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## COGypsy (Aug 12, 2010)

I think this is hilarious because my husband LOVES kisses from his cat and my dog. He has in fact been on a mission for the last 8 years or so to get my dog to lick my face! It is NOT allowed and she knows it, I know it....only one person in the house remains unconvinced that Very. Bad. Things. will happen if Mom's face gets dog-slimed ) 

Fortunately, it's not the one who actually has the long slimey beagle-tongue!


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