# please help me



## glk2310 (Oct 25, 2010)

After 20 yrs of marriage with 3 teenage boys my wife tells me we need to separate .My boys she says hate me and she has wanted this for Ist she said the past 2 years, then she changes her story to six years.Mind you everyone always thought we had an unusually great marriage so this is totally blindsiding me.I had a bit of a mental breakdown and wanted to kill myself friday nite when she hit me with this.Let to preface this , I know I am far from perfect and would sometimes have a few to many beers and yell ,name calling not relizing my words hurt.Not her or my kids every told me it hurt them(I should have relized anyway).
Wanted to off my self Friday after she hit me with this.Grabbed a gun and went into the cellar in hysterics , had a nervous breakdown.She came and took the gun away,I started sweeping the floor to calm down.When i went back upstairs her and the kids had all snuck out leaving me alone in a still bad state of mind.Finally got her to answer my call and said I was sorry and really needed her and the kids to help me to help myself.She went to her friends house who has been feedeing her a bunch of physco garbage(this woman divorced twice/kids in theraphy , a real know it all when it comes to relationships)
My wife listens to whatever this nut says and I was finally able to see my kids and her last nite before I left for a motel.I am dead inside.She and the kids sat thier smiling while I apologized and begged for a chance to make things right.I left cause her and "her boys" would only stay if I left.It hurts so bad being blindsided by all four.She always put them before me.Called last nite and all of them were in our bedroom like a slumber party , even though she says I can,t be around until they all "heal".I want to die the pain is unbearable.No matter what I do or say she only listens to this friend of hers.Someone please help?I feel like they dont care if I live or die.I want things to work but how do the kids see that if i am not there to show them?Why does she have all the say and I have none?How do you undue the brainwashing she has my kids under?Imk going to see my physc this morning before I do something to myself,it hurts so bad to have your family turn against you with no warning and not care.The pain is unbearable


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## jamesa (Oct 22, 2010)

glk2310 said:


> After 20 yrs of marriage with 3 teenage boys my wife tells me we need to separate .My boys she says hate me and she has wanted this for Ist she said the past 2 years, then she changes her story to six years.Mind you everyone always thought we had an unusually great marriage so this is totally blindsiding me.I had a bit of a mental breakdown and wanted to kill myself friday nite when she hit me with this.Let to preface this , I know I am far from perfect and would sometimes have a few to many beers and yell ,name calling not relizing my words hurt.Not her or my kids every told me it hurt them(I should have relized anyway).


Getting drunk and calling her and the kids names is not what most people consider "a great marriage". You need to apologise and convince them all you aren't going to behave like that again.



glk2310 said:


> Wanted to off my self Friday after she hit me with this.Grabbed a gun and went into the cellar in hysterics , had a nervous breakdown.She came and took the gun away,I started sweeping the floor to calm down.When i went back upstairs her and the kids had all snuck out leaving me alone in a still bad state of mind.


So her drunken, aggressive, name-calling husband starts brandishing a gun around and you expect her not to get herself and her kids to safety? You think she was wrong to leave you alone at this stage? She should have called the cops and stayed well away from you.




glk2310 said:


> She went to her friends house who has been feedeing her a bunch of physco garbage(this woman divorced twice/kids in theraphy , a real know it all when it comes to relationships)
> My wife listens to whatever this nut says and I was finally able to see my kids and her last nite before I left for a motel.


So, not satisfied with insulting her and your children, but you insult her friend too?

As an objective observer and based only on your, no doubt biased, side of the story I would advise your wife to leave you and keep the kids far away from you. 

You need to get some therapy in my opinion and convince your wife that you are not going to drink, handle guns or insult anybody again. Once you have done that, for a good amount of time, you might hope for a chance to repair relations with her and your kids.


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