# what to do? HELP



## reddhead (May 23, 2009)

My spouse is a member of a site that rates you based on your looks. In order to get rated yourself you have to go in and rate other people. I was okay (not comfortable) with this as my husband has low self esteem and thought maybe this would help him with that. Well lately he has been clicking on the option of meeting these females. It has only been a few and all are states away. I told him that it was not okay for him to do that. That was not the purpose of him signing up for this. Since we have already had a history of him stepping out of the marriage that him doing that is not acceptable. Well he did it again and this time is a person that is just a few hours away. Regardless if that other person shows interest in him it is a slap in the face to me. With the things that he has done it almost seems to be a deal breaker at this point as it appears he is just waiting for another opportunity to pounce. Am I being oversensitive?


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## smiley (Jul 15, 2009)

reddhead said:


> My spouse is a member of a site that rates you based on your looks. In order to get rated yourself you have to go in and rate other people. I was okay (not comfortable) with this as my husband has low self esteem and thought maybe this would help him with that. Well lately he has been clicking on the option of meeting these females. It has only been a few and all are states away. I told him that it was not okay for him to do that. That was not the purpose of him signing up for this. Since we have already had a history of him stepping out of the marriage that him doing that is not acceptable. Well he did it again and this time is a person that is just a few hours away. Regardless if that other person shows interest in him it is a slap in the face to me. With the things that he has done it almost seems to be a deal breaker at this point as it appears he is just waiting for another opportunity to pounce. Am I being oversensitive?


No, not being oversensitive. Your husband wanted to join a website where other women rate his looks?........Okaaaaaay. That level of insecurity alone would be a big turn off for me. Sounds like he's in high school. Beyond that, he's a married man who's exploring the option of meeting other women who rate his looks on the internet. Do you even need to ask if that's appropriate? Unless you signed up for an "open marriage," I'd say ef that!


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## marriagehelp12 (Apr 8, 2009)

it amazes me sometimes what people will try and get away with.

like smiley said, Unless you signed up for an open marriage I'd tell him good luck with this bimbo three hours away and further if SHE is on this site what does that tell you??


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## WolfeMama (Jul 22, 2009)

your husband shouldn't need approval from other women. What you think of him should be enough. just something to think about


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