# Separation: "what will people think?"



## JohnDoe2012 (Nov 29, 2012)

For those of you who have done a separation, I'd like to hear your advice on "what people think". How did you explain the separation to friends and family? Did you get all kinds of pressure to stay together? If you did get back together with your spouse, do your friends and family look at you differently?


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## Headspin (May 13, 2012)

JohnDoe2012 said:


> For those of you who have done a separation, I'd like to hear your advice on "what people think". How did you explain the separation to friends and family? Did you get all kinds of pressure to stay together? If you did get back together with your spouse, do your friends and family look at you differently?



This is a minefield

At 56 yrs old I thought I knew people but since our separation a year ago I've realized I'll never really know or understand people fully

It's the mutual friends that have shocked me most - upon exposure all have known to the letter our lives - serial adulterer (with many married men) and all were appalled by what she managed to keep doing for 7/8 years (15 11 married) 

However she was born with a 'victim' mentality disorder (borderline) and in the last year it's served her very well as now most of them behave as if she had done almost nothing -"she had such a terrible life she had to get out of it somehow!"

She's still hurting my kids and myself by wanting to sell our family home still seeing in some capacity many former lovers (some of whom are in divorce because of her 'contribution' to that elationship) but her circle of friends outside all of that seem able to completely ignore and actively support 'poor her'

I've actually cut them to the quick as well. I lived with her and know enough about how almost evil she became and how anyone who knows the full story cannot see the same is beyond me. I consider all or anybody that supports her in any positive way has bought into the 'victim' culture and validates her actions as they are "there" for her - Fk them 

My own family completely disowned her from day one once they knew only a part of the story 

Be prepared for some big surprises about your friends or people you though were you friends.


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