# Sexual Frustration



## Anonymous123 (Aug 3, 2010)

I am a 24 year old male. My wife has recently decided to separate from me. Yet, due to financial issues as well as other complications, we are still living under the same roof, even sharing a bed, in fact, and will be for some time until arrangements can be made. My wife has made it clear that she does not want a divorce, and wishes this separation to be temporary only, while still continuing to remain faithful to one another as we take our space for awhile. We had an active sex life before, but are currently no longer having any physical contact. She has mentioned that she wanted to slow things down physically, and although I am opposed, I have chosen to respect her wishes. The problem I’m having is that I have become very sexually frustrated, to the point that I am being caused physical pain. I have tried several times to masturbate, but am unable to finish, only causing further frustration and discomfort. I have attempted to use visual aids such as pornography, but it has not helped. As a veteran, I have faced long periods of sexual abstinence during deployments, but never have I had symptoms of these kinds or severity. There is a constant soreness in my genitals, and I often become sick to my stomach. I have even begun to get headaches, and although I am not sure that they are a direct result, the timing of said headaches would suggest they are related to the issue at hand. Mental effects are also playing a role now. I have never been tempted by infidelity, but I find myself becoming desperate for sexual attention. I am growing very upset over this, and am finding it more difficult to refrain from taking out my frustration on my wife. I have attempted to research related topics, but there is little information to be found, especially on why I am unable to masturbate. I do not know how to discuss this with my wife, and I fear that if I were to bring this up, I would essentially be denying a request of hers that I have already granted. I am very unclear on what I should do. I am open to any advice!


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## Amplexor (Feb 13, 2008)

Anonymous123 said:


> I do not know how to discuss this with my wife, and I fear that if I were to bring this up, I would essentially be denying a request of hers that I have already granted.!


You would not be denying or going back on your agreement by discussing this with her. Recovery in a marriage is rarely based on a straight line that can't be varied from. It will change and adapt as the situations change. Communication is key and not communicating something this important to her is healthier than sitting around stewing or engaging in an infidelity. You are not breaking your word to her, you are letting her know the current situation is not one you wish to continue on in and looking for some compromise or a change in the rules. I can understand the upsetting the apple cart mentality but you can't lose yourself or deny your needs to stay in the status quo. Even if she is unable or unwilling the accept intimacy for now, at least you have communicated your needs to her and she should be understanding of them. Good luck


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## Dave321 (Aug 4, 2010)

The limbo where you at is never a place anybody wants to.The stress of just that alone.And being with a women you want and can't have.If you can stop the mental part of this.Also try and do what the post above said.:iagree:


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