# One more thing that's my fault.



## EnjoliWoman (Jul 2, 2012)

As the ex of someone with NPD, everything is my fault.

So he's perfect and I'm f'd up and yet the counselor, the Guardian ad Litem, the custody advocate and the psychologist all think she needs less time with her Dad due to his negative impact on her emotional well-being.

Latest incident - every year since 2005 he has had to advise me which 2 weeks he wants to use as his weeks of vacation time with D by May 1st. Every year I have to prompt him. Every year one of them has been the first week after school lets out.

And so again, I send an email, he replies he'll speak to her about it on their weekend, then nothing. I send another email and a couple texts. Finally last night I get a reply: "I did not have time to talk to D about it this weekend. Our time is so short together we have not had any other opportunity to discuss it. You have worked to have our communication so minimal that it is hard to plan anything."

So 3 phone calls a week for 15 minutes each, one visit to school to have lunch with her, visits to watch her at gymnastics practice plus every other weekend isn't enough time to ask what she wants to do for vacation? When he knows he has to tell me by the same date every year? Jerk.

My reply 24 hours later: "The deadline has been May 1st for the past 8 years so it's not as if it snuck up on you. School will be out in just a couple weeks. Let me know ASAP, please."

My counselor from years back would be so proud I no longer engage even though I had at least 10 replies about how he brought this on himself since we started off with 50/50 joint custody.

And it works. He replied right away "Okay. I will let you know tomorrow."

I mean, even HE can't argue with logic that he should know that by May 1st he needs to have 2 weeks selected.


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## SlowlyGettingWiser (Apr 7, 2012)

Yuck! What a dillweed! 

Must be tough being so "perfect" in an imperfect world! Life must be VERY aggravating for him...dealing with mere mortals!

So glad you're GONE! Three more years and you're done with his ass, no?


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## EnjoliWoman (Jul 2, 2012)

Four. *sigh* She starts high school next year.

I realize I'll see him at important events for our daughter but I won't have to try to WORK with him on anything. 

AND he showed up at the gymnastics meet half way through it after she had already competed in the first two events because he's late to everything but she'll believe his excuses. I just know he's always late from experience. Last time when HE had to bring her I told her the start time was 30 minutes before it really was just so she'd be on time - and she was! haha

What annoys me most is every time he communicates with me, he HAS to include how little time he has and imply I'm evil, don't have her best interest at heart, just doing it for more support, trying to keep them apart, etc. He just doesn't realize and/or accept responsibility for his own actions being the result of that. After all, HE was the one to initiate the last motion for custody, not me. I was just defending myself. 

He even had kiddo parroting his "four days every two weeks" prior to the last bought of legal maneuvering in 2009. If he wouldn't badmouth me and undermine my authority, question my every move, etc. we would still have 50/50 custody like when we first separated.


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