# Aging...men vs women



## indiecat

Does anyone have any tips on how to deal with an aging husband, one who has less and less interest in intimacy as the years pass?


----------



## Machiavelli

Testosterone decline most likely. How old is he and what does he do for exercise? Is he obese?


----------



## indiecat

Later 50's but been this way for 10 years at least. Had his levels checked, told they were in normal range. Not obese, can do 45 mins of exercise bike when he goes.


----------



## SimplyAmorous

indiecat said:


> Later 50's but been this way for 10 years at least. Had his levels checked, told they were in normal range. Not obese, can do 45 mins of exercise bike when he goes.


Normal range has a GRAY area (anywhere from 250 - 450ish)...that many Doctors do not take into consideration... ignoring symptoms....(normal is very wide ...250 - 1100 depending on the lab)... if he was a 900 man and his levels dropped down to a 450 - he will feel like Hell itself and be fatigued, brain fog, loss of desire compared to a man who was normally around 600ish most of his life but slowly dropping down little by little to a 450ish in his 40-50's ....this man would fare better than the other man - even with similar Test results. 

I've talked to men with higher levels than my own husband who are on Therapy... but mine didn't need it. Yet anyway. 

As they get older....so long as he wants to be there.... Think "Little blue pills" ...and whatever can rev his pleasure and your "emotional connection". 

All Night Long: How to Make Love to a Man Over 50: Barbara Keesling: Books


----------



## waiwera

indiecat... do you two date each other and have fun together?

Have you looked into each others needs (and desires)?
I thinking along the lines of you joining him in a hobby he likes or finding a new hobby you can do together

Why do YOU think he has slowed down so much?


----------



## Woodchuck

I turned 66 this month...would LOVE sex 4-5 times a week, my wife wants it much less...I usually orgasm 2-3 times every day....At one time the wife could keep up with me, sadly, no longer.....


----------



## Rough Patch Sewing

waiwera said:


> indiecat... do you two date each other and have fun together?
> 
> Have you looked into each others needs (and desires)?
> I thinking along the lines of you joining him in a hobby he likes or finding a new hobby you can do together
> 
> Why do YOU think he has slowed down so much?


I second these questions! Even if biological stats are above normal if there is no flare or excitement/connection in the marriage than intimacy will fizzle, or go solo.


----------



## OhGeesh

It's just the way it is!!! I really don't like these threads because there truly is so much grey area high test well into the upper range of average can only be had with lots of supplementation which leads to life long treatment, blood tests, and body's dependence on the treatment.

If you are in normal range you are probably fine end of story. They just had a study come out that showed Adrogel and Viagra together helped ED no more than just Viagra itself. This of course blew the urologists away, but Viagra and it's countperparts works go try that especially since he was tested as normal.


----------



## Rough Patch Sewing

Could the two of you work out together. The high intensity and low weight train together? Whatever that means for both of you as you would train at your appropriate level of intensity... could you do that as a perk up in both your relational connection and intimacy stimulation?

To be honest, sometimes I am not in the mood when she is, because of stress or the many things that are on my mind. But, because she and I know how to connect in our relationship - she gets her way and I am all the happier for it!

Try to tackle this from many angles at once.


----------



## Bobby5000

I would talk nicely and delicately, telling him how much you love him and how important the marriage is. Note because you love him so much you would want to spend more time, and ask if there is a way this can come about . Note there will be a gap in most marriages, and you can try to narrow the gap but cannot expect to have identical drives or interests in other things.


----------



## kate542

In long term and aging relationships if the only thing you have is sex you are in trouble.


----------



## Ikaika

Given that his testosterone levels are within a normal range, the doctor is not likely to prescribe him anything. You may get recommendations to take DHEA, but I recommend you read this before he takes this OTC medication. 

DHEA: MedlinePlus Supplements


----------



## RandomDude

I look so much younger than my wife now it's not funny, and it's almost like she wants to skin me and wear me with her jealous comments. Personally though I like her looking the way she does, more like a sophisticated mature woman. I hate the way I still look, I still get asked for ID when buying tobacco. Bah!


----------

