# What to do about this



## WishIknew5 (Dec 20, 2010)

Ok ladies....im asking this as opinion. The other day I was trying to have sex with my wife. I was like yes perfect timing it was mid day. Kids were napping and nothing was going on. We had just showered and in the bedroom. I was practically begging to have sex with her. But all i got was no...kids will be up any second (which kids had just fallen asleep). Now mind you when we got out of the shower(there will be some description now but it helps understande my frustration) I was completely naked lying onthe bed..and beyond hard. It was right there for the taking and nothing. I was cuddling with her....rubbing her...kissing her and just rejected. All i got was that the kids will get up and wait im looking up something on the tablet. Make a long story short i got tired of just nothing and completely took control. I ripped the tablet out of her hands, and just began taking control of her body. And with that just as things were about to happen in walks my 4 year old. Now my question to you ladies is if your husband is hard and kids are asleep would you take advantage of that time...if not sex and you are worried about getting busted, would you atleast relieve your husband...or vice versa for guys if there wives were turned on. I just dont get why its such a big deal to have sex when ever...maybe its just me and my drive is beyond high.


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

Ummm... we have sex even when the kids are awake. Our kids are 11, 5 & 4. They know NOT to come in when mom & dad's door is closed. If my husband was lying on the bed like that... I'd jump him. No question about it.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## WishIknew5 (Dec 20, 2010)

Lucky him


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## Gaia (Apr 27, 2012)

First of all... LOCKS PEOPLE LOCKS! .... 



That is all... 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## donny64 (Apr 21, 2012)

WishIknew5 said:


> Ok ladies....im asking this as opinion. The other day I was trying to have sex with my wife. I was like yes perfect timing it was mid day. Kids were napping and nothing was going on. We had just showered and in the bedroom. I was practically begging to have sex with her. But all i got was no...kids will be up any second (which kids had just fallen asleep). Now mind you when we got out of the shower(there will be some description now but it helps understande my frustration) I was completely naked lying onthe bed..and beyond hard. It was right there for the taking and nothing. I was cuddling with her....rubbing her...kissing her and just rejected. All i got was that the kids will get up and wait im looking up something on the tablet. Make a long story short i got tired of just nothing and completely took control. I ripped the tablet out of her hands, and just began taking control of her body. And with that just as things were about to happen in walks my 4 year old. Now my question to you ladies is if your husband is hard and kids are asleep would you take advantage of that time...if not sex and you are worried about getting busted, would you atleast relieve your husband...or vice versa for guys if there wives were turned on. I just dont get why its such a big deal to have sex when ever...maybe its just me and my drive is beyond high.


Couple things...put a lock on the door? And teach the kids that mom and dad's door being closed means KNOCK, do not enter until told to do so.

The other..."No" is never an acceptable answer in our house. Because it's rude, and I'm not going to be treated like a child asking for a piece of candy. This "no" thing is a sticking point with me. If she says "no", then I back off completely, and will address it. It is rude and insensitive. There are many better ways to say "No". Like, "not now honey, but later tonight, you're mine!". Or "babe, I'm really not in the mood at the moment, but let me feel better later tonight or tomorrow, and I'm all yours". Just a flat out "No"? That will never get a good reaction out of me.

Think about it...how would a woman feel if she were flat out rejected with a "No"? Not good. I've never done it, have always been kind and offered an explanation or alternative time, and expect the same consideration. She wants it as much as I do, in general. If she doesn't then there's something else going on (illness, relationship issue that needs resolved, work stress, etc.) Whatever it is, we'll address it and go from there. I'll not be treated like I want it more, and am somehow a bothersome child.


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## RClawson (Sep 19, 2011)

Gaia said:


> First of all... LOCKS PEOPLE LOCKS! ....
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Duh!:iagree:


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## lovingsummer (Jul 27, 2012)

I'd be all of it... hard, soft, wet or dry  Can't see myself picking up a tablet when my husband is nekked... how did she react to the "taking her" before the "birth control" walked in?


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## norajane (Feb 7, 2012)

> Now my question to you ladies is if your husband is hard and kids are asleep would you take advantage of that time...if not sex and you are worried about getting busted, would you atleast relieve your husband...or vice versa for guys if there wives were turned on. I just dont get why its such a big deal to have sex when ever...maybe its just me and my drive is beyond high.


I imagine she might have had a hard time switching from mommy mode into sexy mode, especially knowing she'd have to switch right back to mommy mode as soon as one of the kids woke up. 

Or she might not have wanted a quickie, especially if she knew she'd be worrying about the kids and wouldn't be able to relax enough to have an orgasm herself, or knew there wouldn't be enough time for her to reach orgasm.


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## pplwatching (Jun 15, 2012)

donny64 said:


> The other..."No" is never an acceptable answer in our house. Because it's rude, and I'm not going to be treated like a child asking for a piece of candy.


I agree with everything Donny and Norajane said, however the responsibility for communication goes both ways. You can be the one who says "I am all worked up just thinking about you. How about we find the time to make love tonight?"


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## Ano (Jun 7, 2012)

Maricha75 said:


> If my husband was lying on the bed like that... I'd jump him. No question about it.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Omg! Me too! Just a visual of that is turning me on!


Unfortianutly my husband loves sleep. When our son is napping..he likes to take advantage and nap too.

But on a very very very rare occasion he'll bend me over in the laundry room or random area of the house while our son is playing and have a quicky....which isn't very satisfying for me, but I still let him do his thing.


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## honeysuckle rose (Jun 11, 2010)

She clearly didn't want to. You can't say no? I am an adult w/ the option of saying no. If I didn't want to, either I wouldn't, or I would try to get it over with adls soon ad possible AFTER locking the door.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

WishIknew5 said:


> Now my question to you ladies is if your husband is hard and kids are asleep would you take advantage of that time...if not sex and you are worried about getting busted, would you at least relieve your husband...


This is an ongoing issue with my wife. She's up for sex most any time. But if there's nothing in it for her (if she thinks that she won't get her own orgasm), she has no interest in helping me out at all. Like when she's on her period....some people call that bj week. I call it masturbation week.


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## ScarletBegonias (Jun 26, 2012)

I guess that separates the pleasers from the 'gimme mine' gals.

I don't think it's fair to deprive the person you love of pleasure just bc it takes you longer to get off.I don't think anyone should go without but give the person what they need and they will for sure return the favor the very minute you allow them to do so.

I couldn't walk right by a nice hard man on my bed.Seems like such a waste.I was raised to view wasting good things is bad. 

And in case she hasn't thought of this,while she was watching the flintstones or whatever tv special was on after school...her parents were likely in the bedroom working on NOT wasting that hard on.


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## bkaydezz (Jul 9, 2012)

I think its pretty hot that you would sntach it outta her hand and demand it and take control. that should have been enough for her to give in!!!!!

but yes, why not?


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## wiigirl (Jun 14, 2012)

Gaia said:


> First of all... LOCKS PEOPLE LOCKS! ....
> 
> 
> 
> ...


....and be sure to use them! 








_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ladybird (Jun 16, 2010)

I would have taken full advantage of the moment! I just would have locked the bedroom door..


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

The OP is asking about one time. He does not say that this is an ongoing, frequent problem. It might be but he did not make that point.

It's easy to say that one or the other would jump the other's bones in a similar situation. But it should also be ok to not be interested once in a while. Unfortunately the wife is not on here telling us her side.

I'm HD and so would normally be up to just about anything. But when we actully had a sex life I never got bent out of shape if he was not feeling up to it once in a blue moon.

Now that it's never, that's a different case.


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## 99RedBalloons (Aug 16, 2012)

If my husband was a 1 or 2 minute wonder I would just give him a hand job. Easy and quick. But if he is one of those people that needs to go for 45 mins at a time..... he can wait until the kids are asleep.


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## 7737 (Feb 10, 2011)

'The kids might walk in' is just an excuse not to have sex. Just like; 'No honey, I have a headache'...or 'but darling what if we get a delivery?'...or...'no my love, I only changed the bed this morning'...

Some women will use ANY excuse to get out of having sex.

Mine used to...so I gave up trying for it.

Edited - Boy would I just LOVE to give her a taste of her own medicine! She might come onto me maybe once a month if that...boy would I love to say 'Thanks darling but I have a headache...' thing is, is that if I gave her a taste of her own medicine I would NEVER get laid!!!!


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## Created2Write (Aug 25, 2011)

I just have to say that I really dislike the attitude of men and women who say, "I have the right to say no if I want to". How unloving! How selfish, in my opinion! My husband and I have been trying to find a new place of residence. I've been doing the majority of the work, and I asked him the other day if he would help me with contacting apartments. He said yes. If, however, he had just looked at me and said, "No", I would have been livid. 

Marriage, all things about it, are mutual. No one person has any right to decide when things do or do not happen. Period. It's so selfish, almost seeing your spouse as an enemy. The idea of rejecting sex for something so minescule is baffling to me. I would feel as if I was addressing a child, and my husband is certainly no child. 

That's not to say that a wife should have sex every time her husband wants it. That would mean he had total say, and I don't believe in that. Sex should be _mutual_, as much as possible.


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## MaritimeGuy (Jul 28, 2012)

My observation of women is that many of them do not want to feel like sex objects. I don't know specifics of OP's situation but if the approach it 'I've got a hard on...let me stick in you and get off' I can understand it not being received well. If it was more like 'damn you look good baby...look how much you're turning me on' I would expect a better response.

As another posted said it could have just been a one time situational thing. If it's a pattern then it needs to be addressed.


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## WishIknew5 (Dec 20, 2010)

EleGirl said:


> The OP is asking about one time. He does not say that this is an ongoing, frequent problem. It might be but he did not make that point.
> 
> It's easy to say that one or the other would jump the other's bones in a similar situation. But it should also be ok to not be interested once in a while. Unfortunately the wife is not on here telling us her side.
> 
> ...


This is not a 1 time deal....its a regular thing. I am very HD and tell her...but its the same thing. "Later" is all i get. Later comes and there it went.


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## WishIknew5 (Dec 20, 2010)

99RedBalloons said:


> If my husband was a 1 or 2 minute wonder I would just give him a hand job. Easy and quick. But if he is one of those people that needs to go for 45 mins at a time..... he can wait until the kids are asleep.



I even asked for one


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## WishIknew5 (Dec 20, 2010)

To all who put the "lock the door" i understand the comment...but that wasnt the purpose of the post.


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## Almostrecovered (Jul 14, 2011)

WishIknew5 said:


> To all who put the "lock the door" i understand the comment...but that wasnt the purpose of the post.


actually it is relevant

now your in the future your wife will bring up this episode as an excuse to not have sex


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## WishIknew5 (Dec 20, 2010)

Almostrecovered said:


> actually it is relevant
> 
> now your in the future your wife will bring up this episode as an excuse to not have sex


I see where you are coming from...but I can respond door in locked.


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