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## jessi (Feb 11, 2009)

does anyone know what the clause in a separation agreement mean the one about continuing to live together after the agreement is signed about cohabitation....my says that if you live together with the intent of cohabitation for less than 90 days is does not change the agreement, it also says after 90 days if you continue to live together with the intent of cohabitation that both of us would have to agree to make the agreement void.
I signed my agreement on Jan 11th and my husband still lives in the house and wants to until the end of April to think things through in his head as to what he wants....
does giving him time to figure things out make a difference to the separation agreement, could this be considered working on the marriage? We still have meals together, go to the grocery store, watch tv together, discuss our marriage, but the deal is in place, I took care of the separate bank accounts so it's all set for him to move out.....
Now I'm starting to wonder if this decision will hurt anything.....anyone else have this experience...
maybe a trip to a lawyer to review is in order. .......we just drew up our own separation agreement and had it witness...I don't want to screw myself up just trying to be nice.......he does say now he is not sure if he wants to separate, I told him to many if's for me and that he needs to figure things out for himself and then we could have another discussion, I told him that moving out and being by himself might be the best way for him to figure all this out. We don't fight about the marriage or the affair anymore, I have accepted the I don't love you anymore story.......just trying to be patient...


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## TNgirl232 (Oct 5, 2008)

Sounds like he picked a day just outside the agreement to potentially cause issues - tell him he has until the end of March and if he hasn't worked it out in his head by then - he needs to find a new place to stay. It shouldn't be that hard - either he wants to work on it or he doesn't - what does staying in the house with you for 2 extra months do the help him make that decision. You don't miss anything until its gone and by letting him keep everything as it is nothing will change.


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## harley2003 (Feb 8, 2010)

jessi,

I would think it depends on the state. Where I live, you are not separated if you co-habitate period. So as long as my wife is in the house, we are not legally separated. Once she leaves and the separation agreement is in place, she cannot return and we cannot co-habitate. If she does or we do, then the agreement is not voided but it technically starts the 1 year of separation until a final divorce clock back at day one.

I would definitely check with the lawyer or at least check a couple websites for divorce laws in your state.


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## jessi (Feb 11, 2009)

I live in Canada, I think here separation agreement means when ever the date you stopped living as husband and wife.....that can mean sex life, functioning as a couple, socializing and so on. 
We are separate with an agreement, the bank and financial stuff is separate and he has started to pay me my alimony.....
I just don't want to screw up what I have in place now....if he is unsure about his relationship with his OW or me then that is something he needs to deal with himself.....
I'm gone the month of March I wonder if that will count in the # of days in the agreement, I think I need to run this past a lawyer and see what they say.......by the way my husband is a lawyer and has been very generous with the separation agreement, I don't think he would do anything underhanded at this point....he is already embarrassed enough with the whole situation, his reputation has taken a kicking, I think he doesn't want to look any worse than he does already.....Also he doesn't want our kids to look at him in a worse light then they already do.....
okay going to find an independent lawyer just to run this clause by them....


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## Hurtssomuch (Jan 2, 2010)

Jesse,

I live in Canada also and you can still live in the same house just as long as you are not living as husband and wife. You can be seperated and still live in the same house. If you live as husband and wife again and it is longer than 90 days than the seperation becomes void and you have to start all over again. I hope that I explained it so it is understandable.


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## jessi (Feb 11, 2009)

thanks hurts, 
that is how I understood it as well.....the whole thing is so confusing, didn't want to screw anything up......
I think I still will have a lawyer check it out for me.....I have to be sure to look after #1 now(me)

he just doesn't seem to be able to make his move, so since I'm gone the month of march anyway I said he could take his time find something he liked.....
hopefully when I get back he will have his plan set...
thanks again....


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