# Role play and other things to spice up sex life



## JoeHenderson (Oct 3, 2011)

So the sex life has definitely improved in terms of quantity and the quality has been catching up, too. We were very sexless, and then it went to what I believe some people call starfish sex. Anyways, it's slowly gotten more passionate, as she's opening up more (no pun intended, well maybe) and I'm trusting her more in the bedroom. 

That said, I want to keep exploring where we can take things. She has hinted at recently about role-play and I know that she has a thing for fireman. I just bought a fireman costume and plan on surprising her tonight. I'll be throwing out the trash, changing into fireman mode in the garage, and knocking on the door. :grin2:

We'll see how it goes, but hoping to keep things moving. Also, she's not much into toys, but I'd like to explore that as well. Maybe at a later time...

Wish me luck!


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## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

Good luck with the fireman! That sounds fun!


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## JoeHenderson (Oct 3, 2011)

Faithful Wife said:


> Good luck with the fireman! That sounds fun!


Thanks! After regrouping from the sexlessness, I feel like I'm getting my confidence in the bedroom and ready to try new things.


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

If I were you, I would find some way to elude to the fact you are going to do something playful so that she can be in the right frame of mind. Otherwise you'll come back in dressed up like a fireman two seconds after she just put $20 worth of t-bone steaks on the grill to cook that she has carefully marinated all day just to surprise you. If that is the case you will have to be very creative with prolonged foreplay as you rescue burn victims from the grill and then become a ravenous cannibal! 

Cheers, 
Badsanta


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## Young at Heart (Jan 6, 2015)

JoeHenderson said:


> ...Anyways, it's slowly gotten more passionate, as she's opening up more (no pun intended, well maybe) and I'm trusting her more in the bedroom.
> 
> That said, I want to keep exploring where we can take things. *She has hinted at recently about role-play and I know that she has a thing for fireman.* I just bought a fireman costume and plan on surprising her tonight. I'll be throwing out the trash, changing into fireman mode in the garage, and knocking on the door. :grin2:
> 
> ...


Good luck. I think what you are doing is a bad idea, but it might work.

Role playing is about living out and exploring fantasies or at least getting a careful and safe feel for them.

Do you have a safe word if she gets freaked out by something you say or do? How do you stop things if she asks you to do something you don't want to do? Do you even know what she finds hot about a fireman role play? Does she want you to carry her out of room? (are you going to strain your back trying to do it?) Do you have your scene planned out or is it just, Hi look at me, I'm a fireman, now what the hell do we do? Role playing at least at first is scripted. Do you know your script? Does she know hers or are the two of you great at improv?

I would suggest instead of "winging it" after you take the trash out, bring in a box with the fireman outfit in it as a closed box or wrapped up as a present; open a bottle of wine and tell her that you have a surprise for her. Tell her you bought something that she had hinted about as a Halloween costume and prior to Halloween, you wanted to discuss it with her and find out if the two of you should do something special for Halloween. That is very non-threatening. 

If she wants you to put it on and model it for her, say yes I would love to, but tell me what you would like your special fireman to do after he get's his uniform on.

Since you asked us to wish you luck, I wish you luck.


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## JoeHenderson (Oct 3, 2011)

badsanta said:


> If I were you, I would find some way to elude to the fact you are going to do something playful so that she can be in the right frame of mind. Otherwise you'll come back in dressed up like a fireman two seconds after she just put $20 worth of t-bone steaks on the grill to cook that she has carefully marinated all day just to surprise you. If that is the case you will have to be very creative with prolonged foreplay as you rescue burn victims from the grill and then become a ravenous cannibal!
> 
> Cheers,
> Badsanta


That's a great idea. I've been making hints to getting it on already, so hopefully that'll help. I'd like to have an element of surprise in terms of dressing up, though. Thoughts?


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## JoeHenderson (Oct 3, 2011)

Young at Heart said:


> Good luck. I think what you are doing is a bad idea, but it might work.
> 
> Role playing is about living out and exploring fantasies or at least getting a careful and safe feel for them.
> 
> ...


I appreciate your feedback. It's good I brought this up with TAM.

As of now the safe word would be "stop" or "no." :laugh: As of now, she's shared that she's into a man in uniform, and a fireman is a pretty masculine image of that. She's petite and I've been working out, so I have no problems carrying her, but I get where you're coming from in terms of expectations and planning. I did plan on saying that I'm part of a "fire detector awareness program" and wanted to see if hers works...I don't have a well-thought out script, but I feel comfortable improving. She is good at improv, too. 

I also like your idea of wrapping it and having a talk about it. Any thoughts from others about *surprising her vs having it wrapped*?


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## JoeHenderson (Oct 3, 2011)

peacem said:


> Good for you. Fireman - how exciting! Is it realistic? The reason I ask is because I have investigated role-play get up and they always look too fake. I really like the real looking thing. My H said he likes the idea of a nurses uniform, but the type I showed him were the pvc sexy (wipe clean) type that did not appeal. He wants the real deal. Me too. Its interesting what sex stores think we want, don't you think?
> 
> Your partner is lucky
> 
> Hope all goes well! :grin2:


The material is actually not bad for a costume. It comes with fireman trousers and suspenders, and fire department t-shirt. 

I'd also like my wife in either a nurse outfit or librarian. Then I'd like her to dress up as catwoman or black canary, but I'm afraid that might come off too nerdy. :laugh:


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## Young at Heart (Jan 6, 2015)

peacem said:


> .... I showed him were the pvc sexy (wipe clean) type that did not appeal. *He wants the real deal. Me too*.....


Uniforms - Nursing Scrubs, Nursing Uniforms & Medical Scrubs - allheart Nursing medical outfits

US Uniform Supply - Home Police, Fire, Park, First Responder


Blumenthal Uniforms|Equipment|Law Enforcement|Fire Service|Security Police Fire SWAT Team

Enjoy!


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## Maneo (Dec 4, 2012)

JoeHenderson said:


> I appreciate your feedback. It's good I brought this up with TAM.
> 
> As of now the safe word would be "stop" or "no." [/B]?


Generally , the idea of a safe word is Anything but "stop" or "no" so she can say those without really meaning that. We have a safe word that is nothing like stop, no, don't, quit, etc etc so she can beg and plead and sometimes just spontaneously blurt out Stop! without really meaning for me to stop. When she does use the safe word I always honor it and immediately stop what I am doing.


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## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

Young at Heart said:


> Uniforms - Nursing Scrubs, Nursing Uniforms & Medical Scrubs - allheart Nursing medical outfits
> 
> US Uniform Supply - Home Police, Fire, Park, First Responder
> 
> ...


I looked through these and didn't see a nurse's dress (real nurses don't actually wear them much). But I did find these:

http://www.uniformadvantage.com/pag...3333&ef_id=VgX3gQAABXa4XQhb:20&frmColor=WHITE


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## JoeHenderson (Oct 3, 2011)

Well we did the role play last night and it was a success! She was really into it and we both did a good job of improvising. She recommended that I definitely keep the costume.


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## Lila (May 30, 2014)

That's awesome @JoeHenderson. It's great that you two were able to improvise without too much trouble. 

Every time H and I have tried the role play thing, we always have fun but it's more of the tongue in cheek kind. I can't keep a straight face to save my life. It ends up being like those really cheesy porn movies. 

About the only 'real' role I can act out well is the escort on a girlfriend experience with a businessman.:wink2:>


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

Way to go, Fireman Joe!!

I hope there were plenty of cheesy lines with your play


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

Lila said:


> That's awesome @JoeHenderson. It's great that you two were able to improvise without too much trouble.
> 
> Every time H and I have tried the role play thing, we always have fun but it's more of the tongue in cheek kind.


We're a bit like that too... we can be serious enough for it to be sexy... with an undertone of silliness. Our visual props have been fairly minimal. Sometimes parts of costumes lend themselves to other uses. We sync into that kind of fun play together. I'm feeling it's time to bring something new in. I think my husband as a fireman could be fun!

Despite appearances, my husband does not have a Batman costume. He has unexpectedly broken into the 'Batman' voice though, during the act, which has ended up with us both laughing. I'll never know how he can have me in stitches with laughter, without missing a beat.


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## JoeHenderson (Oct 3, 2011)

heartsbeating said:


> We're a bit like that too... we can be serious enough for it to be sexy... with an undertone of silliness. Our visual props have been fairly minimal. Sometimes parts of costumes lend themselves to other uses. We sync into that kind of fun play together. I'm feeling it's time to bring something new in. I think my husband as a fireman could be fun!
> 
> Despite appearances, my husband does not have a Batman costume. He has unexpectedly broken into the 'Batman' voice though, during the act, which has ended up with us both laughing. I'll never know how he can have me in stitches with laughter, without missing a beat.


Sexy with silly undertones...that's a good way to describe how it went. I opened with "Good evening, miss. Joe from city fire department. we're going around the neighborhood checking to see if your smoke detector's properly installed. May I come in?"

Then there was the eye contact, and light brushing up on each other. 

Eventually it was my wife who won cheesy porn line with "I see you brought your hose." :laugh:

You know I also have a Batman costume for this Halloween, but I don't know how much she's into Batman, though. I could put toys in my utility belt, though. >


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