# Was I Wrong?



## Ano (Jun 7, 2012)

So here's how my night played out. 

My husband fell asleep....so I got into a movie. He wakes up and gets ontop of me and starts trying to take my clothes off and is kissing me.

I start laughing and he said "I wanna play"... I said "you were just asleep!"... and he said "I'm awake now and I wanna play".

Sooo in a totally joking manner in between his breast fondles and kisses I said "I liked you better when you were asleep!".

We continued kissing and he goes to take my pants off and I stop him.

He said again "I wanna play! Play with me!

I said "I can't because I just started my period"

IMMEDIATELY he gets off of me. Completely stops kissing me. Lays down and closes his eyes.

I said "really? I tell you that I'm on my period and you immediately completely stop kissing me and go lay down to go back to sleep?, is that all you really want from me? Wow. Thanks"

To which he responded "you just told me that you like me better when I'm asleep so don't turn this around on me"


I didn't say anything else. He closed his eyes and went back to sleep.

This is the first time we've ever had this problem. This whole sex rejection thing is very new to him. He usually gets it whenever he wants it. I don't even know what to think.

I feel so angry/hurt/rejected. But was what I said to him really that terrible? It was all in a joking manner and he continued to do what his thing after I laughed any said it.

Ugh..

Am I just being hormonal and over thinking this?


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## sisters359 (Apr 9, 2009)

I don't understand. You felt rejected, but your words, no matter how they were said, seem to indicate you didn't want to continue playing. When he finally took the hint, you were offended? I don't understand why. 

Do you feel he only gives you affection when he wants sex? Then say you need affection in addition to sex. Tell him what you mean--"I like kissing just for the sake of kissing," or whatever. He won't know if you don't tell him. 

But, yeah, I would have assumed my partner was sending me signals to leave him alone if he kept making jokes that suggested he wasn't into what I was doing.


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## sandc (Dec 15, 2011)

You are being hormonal and over thinking it.

You wanted him to stop and he did. Or... did you not want him to stop?

Give the guy a break.


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## Ano (Jun 7, 2012)

sandc said:


> You are being hormonal and over thinking it.
> 
> You wanted him to stop and he did. Or... did you not want him to stop?
> 
> Give the guy a break.


Lol..well I didn't want him to stop totally..

Its the 2nd day of my period so its kinda heavy and makes sex not appealing. But I totally could of pleased him other ways...had he not totally jump off of me and proceed to go back to sleep as soon as the word period came out of my mouth.

I know. I know. I'm just being hormonal. :thumbdown:


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## River1977 (Oct 25, 2010)

I think he would have stopped anyway after learning it's your time of month even if you hadn't said you liked him better asleep. Still you can't know by this one incident. I expect everyone will say it's what you asked for. It will blow me away for any guy to confess here that he would have stopped anyway, when most women know it's what they do. Since it never happened before, I guess you'll never know unless it happens again.


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## sandc (Dec 15, 2011)

Ano said:


> Lol..well I didn't want him to stop totally..
> 
> Its the 2nd day of my period so its kinda heavy and makes sex not appealing. But I totally could of pleased him other ways...had he not totally jump off of me and proceed to go back to sleep as soon as the word period came out of my mouth.
> 
> I know. I know. I'm just being hormonal. :thumbdown:


Thank you for taking my reply in the spirit in which it was intended. Here are the missing smileys from my post:   and just for good measure. 

I get a little grumpy when I don't get a little Mrs. SandC too. Don't be too hard on the guy. He was just disappointed and felt a little rejected. Maybe you can just redirect him next time he wants to "play." Just tell him, no, it's your turn to play and then do that BJ thing you do. :smthumbup:


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## Vizion (Jul 21, 2012)

Ano said:


> So here's how my night played out.
> 
> My husband fell asleep....so I got into a movie. He wakes up and gets ontop of me and starts trying to take my clothes off and is kissing me.
> 
> ...


hes being a baby. tell him how you feel and when it "sinks in" he will say hes sorry. I've done similar to my wife and felt like an ass after my tantrum


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## AFEH (May 18, 2010)

Ano said:


> So here's how my night played out.
> 
> My husband fell asleep....so I got into a movie. He wakes up and gets ontop of me and starts trying to take my clothes off and is kissing me.
> 
> ...


Totally depends on how you said it. The look on your face, the tone of your voice, your demeanour.

At one end of the spectrum it could have meant “Sod off” and at the other end “Chase me/play with me” and just about anything else in between.

And then you told him you can’t play with him. So I’m guessing he took it as sod off, which is indicated by his subsequent body language.


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

Ano said:


> Lol..well I didn't want him to stop totally..
> 
> Its the 2nd day of my period so its kinda heavy and makes sex not appealing. But I totally could of pleased him other ways...had he not totally jump off of me and proceed to go back to sleep as soon as the word period came out of my mouth.
> 
> I know. I know. I'm just being hormonal. :thumbdown:


Then practice honst communication not games.

He gave you exactly what you asked for.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

Well this is how it works between my wife and I.
She usually keeps a calender,marking when her period is expected to start.
But I am usually too busy to check it.
So,usually on the first day of her period,she places the adhesive peel off strip at the back of the napkin on MY SIDE of the dresser.

It simply means " limit your expectations for the next 5 days."

So I still get to hug, kiss , HJ , BJ etc, but no penetration.
I don't do sex during her period.

I don't think the OP,or her husband was wrong per say. It was just a little miscommunication. But I understand how she feels. This has happened with my wife & I in the past.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

He was perhaps feeling guilty. "Oh, God! My poor wife is having her period and all I could think of was having sex with her! What a POS I am!"

Maybe you could 'surprise' him with a game later today?:smthumbup:


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## Stonewall (Jul 5, 2011)

I can be a little to sensitive to things like that sometimes so this is not to say it is right but there is a good chance I would have taken it that way and felt rejected too. Not because you said o but because you said you liked me better asleep.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

sandc said:


> You are being hormonal and over thinking it.
> 
> You wanted him to stop and he did. Or... did you not want him to stop?
> 
> Give the guy a break.


Yea...you were giving off signals for him to stop, told him you like him better sleeping, and the final straw for him was the 'period' excuse (how he sees it). He took your hint to stop, so he did. Kissing and cuddling when he's horny and rejected would make it worse for him. I totally get it.

And yea, my husband goes from :sleeping: to :woohoo: in 3 seconds. haha


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## cjpa (Jul 17, 2012)

Sounds like you just hurt his feelings, rejection never feels good. He probably just wants to feel attractive and desirable.. Put yourself in his shoes and think about how it would make you feel, that's always a good way to put it into perspective.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

If I was the husband, I would have been PI$$ED. I understand his side better.... but anything can be forgiven and made up....just apologize --if you feel you hurt his feelings.. I would surely feel his feelings were HURT 1st in this....

Cause he started out very happy and "playful"  .. then he felt like he was cut with a knife, I agree with the others... he felt rejection.. and that sucks. 

Could have been handled so much smoother... like saying "Darn Honey, I wish I could give it to you".... .then reached down below and got him off, the night would have ended far different, you could have still been "playful" and he would have been the happiest man around. 

We all miss it sometimes (this is nothing new) but we still love each other........ just talk about it. And re-do that night !


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

You sh1t tested him and got what you deserved. Don't do that again.


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

Ano said:


> So here's how my night played out.
> 
> My husband fell asleep....so I got into a movie. He wakes up and gets ontop of me and starts trying to take my clothes off and is kissing me.
> 
> ...


I, like your husband would have felt the same way. Hard to tell not being there. If it was a playful remark about liking him better asleep then fine. But whatever message you wanted to send he got the message you did not want him and did not want him to bother you.

Games are risky.


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## Ano (Jun 7, 2012)

He seems fine today....I guess it was in the moment kind of situation.

He woke up in the middle of the night and woke me up fondleing my boobs (I wasn't searing a shirt)... but it didn't go anywhere, I was dead tired. 

I learned my lesson. Ill think before I speak next time!

And he woke up our 3 year old "accidentally" at 5 am this morning while getting ready for work...

Our son never went back to sleep after that..so I guess that was my payback. Lol


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