# How long it takes me to orgasm



## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

For all the ladies who wonder if you are the only one who takes a long time to climax, relax! Here is more of my confessions of a sex-loving wife:

Yesterday it took me 60 minutes, my record last month was 3 minutes, usually 10 - 20 minutes. Sometimes it won't happen at all. I like to have one O every day.

When I use my fingers laying in bed at night, I usually fall asleep on myself. I joke with my husband that no wonder he falls asleep on me: I fall asleep on me! 

What helps:
- being aroused
- sitting up and watching so my mind does not wander, because once I lose focus it takes so much longer
- nipple play or some penetration with finger or toy
- using a vibrator, although this can be a problem. Sometimes I pack away the vibrator so I can get back to nature. The Hitachi is so strong, it is like a darn jack hammer and leaves me all numb; how can that be good? 
- honestly, often I don't know...why sometimes nothing feels good and I figure it's just that time of the month so I don't try for an O or I just give up


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## magnoliagal (Mar 30, 2011)

Star it takes practice to O without the toys. Once you start with vibes it's hard to go back to manual. I know I've been there and I O easily but once I started using vibes I lost my ability to O without them. I quit them cold turkey and worked solo manually till I relearned how to O without them.


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## ladyybyrd (Jan 4, 2011)

It takes me a lot longer to O having sex then it does when i am alone. I read somewhere that the more times a woman has sex and o's the shorter the time is to get there. It takes me 3 minutes to get there myself sometimes shorter, it can take me 2 hrs sometimes during sex to get there. It really depends the more into my H is the less time it takes me.


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## magnoliagal (Mar 30, 2011)

ladyybyrd said:


> It takes me a lot longer to O having sex then it does when i am alone.


Interesting for me it's about the same.


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## michzz (Jun 6, 2008)

Does it matter what's going on?

vibe vs oral vs intercourse vs fingers, etc?


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

Back in the day , after some forplay, I O'd very quickly once the pumping started -within a couple minutes, probably cause I was half starving by the time we got around to sex. (back then, never used a dildo or Vibe, completely foreign to me) Now that we have alot more regular sex going on, it takes about 7-15 minutes each time. I orgasm 99% of the time. Very rare for me not to get mine. I get mine more than he gets his -these days. The absolute longest time might have been 20 minutes. 

I have only used a vibrator twice in my life, didn't care for it at all, didn't even O from it. I want the man, nothing else is even comparable for me. He does not care for toys and told me he wants me to use him, a little jealous of the thought of toys I guess. I did orgasm from a dildo I purchased on a handful of occasions. Toys is a whole nother area for us to explore someday if things start slowing down, but for now, all is good- with a little help from vitamin V now & then.


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## chingchang (Sep 21, 2010)

My wife Os with oral in 1-4 minutes every time...then again with sex 1-2 more times within minutes. I hold-out for her 3 Os and cum about 10 minutes later. The entire thing lasts 15 minutes. I would like it to last longer...and I'm working on that...so that means more Os for the wifey...probably 5-6 per session. Crazy...

CC


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## magnoliagal (Mar 30, 2011)

michzz said:


> Does it matter what's going on?
> 
> vibe vs oral vs intercourse vs fingers, etc?


Yes it matters.


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## michzz (Jun 6, 2008)

So what's quickest and what's the most physically intense? Ranked in order if course. 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## magnoliagal (Mar 30, 2011)

michzz said:


> So what's quickest and what's the most physically intense? Ranked in order if course.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


What difference does it make? Obviously solo of any form is the quickest but for me the most physically intense is anything with my husband. It's why I would rather be with my husband no matter what we are doing.


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## michzz (Jun 6, 2008)

Doesn't make a difference, just curious.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

magnoliagal said:


> What difference does it make? Obviously solo of any form is the quickest but for me the most physically intense is anything with my husband. It's why I would rather be with my husband no matter what we are doing.


Actually, I can make my lover orgasm far quicker than she can on her own... Not that it's a contest or anything...  But I would agree that the ones with someone else are almost always more intense.

C


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## magnoliagal (Mar 30, 2011)

PBear said:


> Actually, I can make my lover orgasm far quicker than she can on her own... Not that it's a contest or anything...  But I would agree that the ones with someone else are almost always more intense.
> 
> C


You sound like a better lover than my husband is. He's too passive to make me orgasm faster than I can do it on my own. Not giving up though. I think he will catch on if I keep doing what I'm doing.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

magnoliagal said:


> You sound like a better lover than my husband is. He's too passive to make me orgasm faster than I can do it on my own. Not giving up though. I think he will catch on if I keep doing what I'm doing.


I don't know about "better lover", but with my partner, we've found what "buttons" to push. With her, it's a g-spot thing. Again, I find myself wishing I could find the video again that showed me what I needed to know when we did our exploring.

And so long as you get there in the end, does it matter how long it takes?  I rarely shoot for speed, in fact I'm usually very much the opposite. I'd much rather tease her for as long as I can, to be honest. We both enjoy that.

C


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## magnoliagal (Mar 30, 2011)

PBear said:


> And so long as you get there in the end, does it matter how long it takes?
> 
> C


It doesn't but you did take the time to figure out the buttons to push. With my husband he tries but it's mostly me. I control whether I have an orgasm with him or not. If I left up to him I'd rarely have one during sex. Like last night for example it was 2 minutes of foreplay before he climbed on top of me where I knew he wouldn't last long. I had to take charge, change positions, whatever it took to slow him down so I could enjoy it. Hence it's mostly me.

I'm not bad mouthing him don't get me wrong. Some nights he takes his time but mostly he doesn't unless I make him.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

magnoliagal said:


> It doesn't but you did take the time to figure out the buttons to push. With my husband he tries but it's mostly me. I control whether I have an orgasm with him or not. If I left up to him I'd rarely have one during sex. Like last night for example it was 2 minutes of foreplay before he climbed on top of me where I knew he wouldn't last long. I had to take charge, change positions, whatever it took to slow him down so I could enjoy it. Hence it's mostly me.
> 
> I'm not bad mouthing him don't get me wrong. Some nights he takes his time but mostly he doesn't unless I make him.


I think some people are wired differently... That their partner's pleasure is as important as their own. For whatever reason, I think I've been that way since my very first experience.

She's trying to "help" me with that... Having times that are just for me. I'm willing to try that, even if I don't "need" that, because she obviously feels the same way as I do, that my pleasure is as important as hers. It's been a very interesting relationship so far... 

And no worries on the "not bad mouthing" your spouse... There's lots of things that get said in the forums that are just comments on how we feel, with no slights intended to spouses or partners! That's why we're here! 

C


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## magnoliagal (Mar 30, 2011)

PBear said:


> I think some people are wired differently... That their partner's pleasure is as important as their own.
> 
> C


It's weird he says it's important to him that I O and enjoy him but that's as far as it goes. 

My new theory is that his love tank is empty and until I fill him back up he isn't all that motivated in going the extra mile for me. For years I was selfish and took more than I gave. This is most likely the result of that. So now I'm going above and beyond loving him and slowly he's starting to show signs of wanting to reciprocate. Like I've given him massages almost every night and only just in the past week has he offered to give me one. He's the most giving man I know but even he has limits.


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