# Asking for oral?



## vcard (Nov 30, 2012)

My wife and I were both virgins until we got married. We didn't have sex right away (logistics), but ever since we did, we have a great sex life. Frequency is great for us both, and both are satisfied. 

My wife has performed oral on me a few times, but I was too worried about what it would taste like for her, so we switched to a handjob those times. A few other times, she has performed oral with flavored condoms (my suggestion, since I was still worried), and she was pretty into it too.. However, to this day, I have not finished without a condom....and I really desire it without a condom.... I hinted at it a few times, so she started one day, but then she got up and went to the washroom and rinsed her mouth. I asked what the issue was, and she said "I have this salty feeling in my mouth"...needless to say, that didn't go so well (and I didn't even finish, mind you). 

How do I go about this? I don't want her to be offended...and I don't want this to mess up everything else we have going for us..


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## PhillyGuy13 (Nov 29, 2013)

I'm told that semen generally tastes like what you've eaten. Eat a lot of fruit the day before and of the act.

Stay away from asparagus and seafood.

It's probably not that pleasant tasting no matter what, it is something she will need to get used to.

Do you reciprocate for her?

But to answer your question -- talk to her. Voice your desires. She isn't a mind reader. Not in the heat of the moment but at an appropriate time.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## NewHubs (Dec 23, 2012)

Ugh...using condoms for oral while married...seriously?!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## GIM003 (Feb 5, 2014)

It seems to me that you are very considerate of your wife and this is admirable. It may also be part of your problem in this situation. In your description you tell us that your wife can get pretty into things. The fact that she will bring you to completion with a condom (which tends to slow things down) does suggest that she is willing to go the distance.

You also make make several references to the fact that you are worried about how it will taste. Neither of you will know what she will think of the taste until you try. Right now you are assuming that she will not like the taste.

If she might need water, then have a glass of water close at hand. If she stops for a drink, don't let it bother you. As long as she knows that you are okay with her stopping short of completion if, for whatever reason, doesn't feel ready to have you cum in her mouth, then you should try not to worry so much. Your worrying isn't helping you to get what you want and it isn't helping your wife give you something that she may be perfectly willing to do. Talk to her openly about your concerns and your desires. If she is willing to try then just do it. It's the only way both of you can find out what she thinks of the taste of semen.

It took 25 years (seriously!) for my wife to let me cum in her mouth. I was also trying to be super considerate of her. There are lots of other ways to complete, but I have to say that life is better now that a full BJ is an available option. Just so you know, my wife has a very sensitive palate but actually finds the taste of my semen to not be a problem.

A few random thoughts:
Don't use giving her oral as a bargaining chip in this. You should go down on her because it is awesome fun to do.

Here's an idea. It might help your worries about the taste for her if you suggest snowballing. (share and share alike) Or you might prefer to stick with drinking lots of pineapple juice.

I hope this works out for you both. Then you can move onto the big spit or swallow debate.


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## usmarriedguy (Dec 9, 2013)

I guess some people are saltier than others and some are more sensitive to tasting it. I know that I complain much more than my wife when we go to restaurants which over salt the food. 

I guess there are other ways to add flavoring without condoms and maybe you could try those to mask the taste. 

Over time maybe her taste pallet will change a bit. 

_"How do I go about this? I don't want her to be offended...and I don't want this to mess up everything else we have going for us.."_

Go slow, and understand that you are lucky to get a BJ at all.


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

Flavored lube.


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## Phil Landers (Apr 26, 2014)

WorkingOnMe said:


> Flavored lube.


By her some Lickwid Lube. Tastes great.


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## Uglee70 (Jan 2, 2009)

vcard said:


> My wife and I were both virgins until we got married. We didn't have sex right away (logistics), but ever since we did, we have a great sex life. Frequency is great for us both, and both are satisfied.
> 
> My wife has performed oral on me a few times, but I was too worried about what it would taste like for her, so we switched to a handjob those times. A few other times, she has performed oral with flavored condoms (my suggestion, since I was still worried), and she was pretty into it too.. However, to this day, I have not finished without a condom....and I really desire it without a condom.... I hinted at it a few times, so she started one day, but then she got up and went to the washroom and rinsed her mouth. I asked what the issue was, and she said "I have this salty feeling in my mouth"...needless to say, that didn't go so well (and I didn't even finish, mind you).
> 
> How do I go about this? I don't want her to be offended...and I don't want this to mess up everything else we have going for us..


My wife doesn't like the taste either. Her solution is that she only ever gives me oral in the shower. She also says she gets a cramp in her jaw after a few minutes. I think that maybe she just isn't too fussed with the idea of giving BJ's. Oh well, such is life. I don't like Brussels sprouts, so I NEVER put them in my mouth.
My point is, if she doesn't like it she doesn't have to do it..it's her choice.


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## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

Honey, chocolate syrup, whipped cream, champagne


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

vcard said:


> My wife and I were both virgins until we got married. We didn't have sex right away (logistics), but ever since we did, we have a great sex life. Frequency is great for us both, and both are satisfied.
> 
> My wife has performed oral on me a few times, but I was too worried about what it would taste like for her, so we switched to a handjob those times. A few other times, she has performed oral with flavored condoms (my suggestion, since I was still worried), and she was pretty into it too.. However, to this day, I have not finished without a condom....and I really desire it without a condom.... I hinted at it a few times, so she started one day, but then she got up and went to the washroom and rinsed her mouth. I asked what the issue was, and she said "I have this salty feeling in my mouth"...needless to say, that didn't go so well (and I didn't even finish, mind you).
> 
> How do I go about this? I don't want her to be offended...and I don't want this to mess up everything else we have going for us..


That was likely just pre-ejaculate. With regard to the taste, listen to what PhillyGuy13 mentioned about diet.

Either way, it seems like she's into it. I'd ditch the condoms. Maybe go w/ a flavored gel or lube. Also, make sure you're washing thoroughly and regularly (DUH). Maybe do a bit of "manscaping" as well.


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

usmarriedguy said:


> Go slow, and understand that you are lucky to get a BJ at all.


LOL. Yes!!!


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

I don't understand why you'd get so worked up over her saying it was salty. She didn't say you were disgusting and she seems to be willing to try, so like others have said drink some pineapple juice, keep some water around for her and enjoy!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## I Notice The Details (Sep 15, 2012)

I recommend that you relax, go with the flow and ditch the condoms. Your wife seems more ok with it than you are. Just relax and let her give you this wonderful pleasure. Let her determine if she doesn't like the taste. 

Along the same lines, I know many women who think they smell or taste bad "down there", yet I know many men (especially this man) who LOVE the smell and taste of a woman down there. My point is let her decide what she likes and doesn't like. Don't assume.

PS: My wife is much more receptive to giving me fantastic oral sex right after I have gotten out of a hot shower, and have a towel wrapped around my waist. She loves to pull it off, tease my body, and then go to town on the stallion. Good luck to you.


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

I'm sure this timid approach of yours is adorable for a starry eyed virgin. But long term it doesn't bode well for your sex life. At some point your young bride will start to crave having a Man (tm). And you'll need to put on your big boy britches and take over.


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## carpenoctem (Jul 4, 2012)

Wife and I sometimes TALK about sex.

And that is all the oral sex we have.


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## Seawolf (Oct 10, 2011)

vcard said:


> My wife and I were both virgins until we got married. We didn't have sex right away (logistics), but ever since we did, we have a great sex life. Frequency is great for us both, and both are satisfied.
> 
> My wife has performed oral on me a few times, but I was too worried about what it would taste like for her, so we switched to a handjob those times. A few other times, she has performed oral with flavored condoms (my suggestion, since I was still worried), and she was pretty into it too.. However, to this day, I have not finished without a condom....and I really desire it without a condom.... I hinted at it a few times, so she started one day, but then she got up and went to the washroom and rinsed her mouth. I asked what the issue was, and she said "I have this salty feeling in my mouth"...needless to say, that didn't go so well (and I didn't even finish, mind you).
> 
> How do I go about this? I don't want her to be offended...and I don't want this to mess up everything else we have going for us..



I might get criticized for this suggestion, but here goes. Along with some of the above ideas, how about starting with a glass of wine, or a ****tail before doing the deed? Even better, if you partake, perhaps try doing this at 4:20 some afternoon? I'm not talking about getting hammered, but you, and maybe your wife, sound like you're really into each other, but just a little uptight. Taking the edge of, especially herbally, might help both of you see that this really is no big deal, and an awful lot of fun.

Good luck!


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## Dalek Sek (Jul 31, 2013)

Pineapple juice is your friend. My wife has always been VERY into oral and lets me cum in her mouth maybe once a month or so. Until I started drinking pineapple juice every day. Now, as long as she cums first, she doesn't care if I finish in her mouth or not. She said the change was dramatic.


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## over20 (Nov 15, 2013)

vcard said:


> My wife and I were both virgins until we got married. We didn't have sex right away (logistics), but ever since we did, we have a great sex life. Frequency is great for us both, and both are satisfied.
> 
> My wife has performed oral on me a few times, but I was too worried about what it would taste like for her, so we switched to a handjob those times. A few other times, she has performed oral with flavored condoms (my suggestion, since I was still worried), and she was pretty into it too.. However, to this day, I have not finished without a condom....and I really desire it without a condom.... I hinted at it a few times, so she started one day, but then she got up and went to the washroom and rinsed her mouth. I asked what the issue was, and she said "I have this salty feeling in my mouth"...needless to say, that didn't go so well (and I didn't even finish, mind you).
> 
> How do I go about this? I don't want her to be offended...and I don't want this to mess up everything else we have going for us..


That fact that she is open to giving you oral is a very good thing. There is a really good book called "Blow him away" by Marcy Michaels. You can buy it at Barnes and Noble. It gives a lot of advice and how too's. Maybe the two of you could read it together and find out what works best.

Most importantly praise her efforts, we wives want to know we are pleasing our husbands!


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

vcard said:


> My wife and I were both virgins until we got married. We didn't have sex right away (logistics), but ever since we did, we have a great sex life. Frequency is great for us both, and both are satisfied.
> 
> My wife has performed oral on me a few times, but I was too worried about what it would taste like for her, so we switched to a handjob those times. A few other times, she has performed oral with flavored condoms (my suggestion, since I was still worried), and she was pretty into it too.. However, to this day, I have not finished without a condom....and I really desire it without a condom.... I hinted at it a few times, so she started one day, but then she got up and went to the washroom and rinsed her mouth. I asked what the issue was, and she said "I have this salty feeling in my mouth"...needless to say, that didn't go so well (and I didn't even finish, mind you).
> 
> How do I go about this? I don't want her to be offended...and I don't want this to mess up everything else we have going for us..


That is so sweet! You are worried she may not like the taste?

Well to be honest, lots of women don't find the taste to be...um...yummy. It's not about the taste though. As a woman with super taster taste buds, it don't find the taste off putting except that one time he covered his penis in chocolate icing...hint chocolate icing and semen do NOT MIX!!!!!

Sometimes his precum is very bitter, but not frequently. However, there isn't a whole lot of it so it's not like the taste is flossing my mouth. Add to that, a really good BJ is very slobbery so she is producing a great deal of saliva that dilutes the taste and consistency.

You are a sweet husband to be concerned about it though! My guess is that she is just as concerned that she is making you happy. Talk to her openly about it and see how she feels.


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

WorkingOnMe said:


> I'm sure this timid approach of yours is adorable for a starry eyed virgin. But long term it doesn't bode well for your sex life. At some point your young bride will start to crave having a Man (tm). And you'll need to put on your big boy britches and take over.


This is true!


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## 1971 (Mar 7, 2013)

WorkingOnMe said:


> I'm sure this timid approach of yours is adorable for a starry eyed virgin. But long term it doesn't bode well for your sex life. At some point your young bride will start to crave having a Man (tm). And you'll need to put on your big boy britches and take over.



Nothing Sexier than a man that knows what he wants.


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## loveisblind? (Aug 6, 2013)

Ok so here's my two cents for what it's worth. Ditch the condoms and lube. Tastes nasty. Get a blowjob and finish with a handjob sans condom. You want the cum to land on your belly and then when exclaiming how fantastic it was and how much you love her etc  you kindly convince her to taste it. Tease her into it if that's the nature of your relationship. Say it would be hot to finish in her mouth but you don't know what it tastes like and there's no way in hell you will ever taste it bc that's weird for you but get her to taste it (touch and dab works). You'll both be pleasantly surprised that it doesn't really have a taste. Mostly a texture thing. Good luck!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## justfabulous (Feb 9, 2014)

Dalek Sek said:


> Pineapple juice is your friend. My wife has always been VERY into oral and lets me cum in her mouth maybe once a month or so. Until I started drinking pineapple juice every day. Now, as long as she cums first, she doesn't care if I finish in her mouth or not. She said the change was dramatic.



Yes, you should definitely try drinking pineapple juice- take it from me, it definitely has a very positive effect! The first time I ever went down on my husband (the only sexual partner I've ever had), I was excited about wanting to do it, but apprehensive since I'd heard plenty of talk among women about terrible taste (some people really exaggerate!). So, I mixed him a few yummy ****tails that night, containing plenty of pineapple juice - starting a few hours before we got intimate (he had no idea what I was planning to do later ) As it turned out, there was absolutely nothing unpleasant about the taste, and it was indeed actually rather sweet tasting -I could definitely detect the effect of the pineapple juice - it was quite lovely 

But I also did a couple of other things that 1st time to help ensure it was a pleasurable as possible for both of us... While he drank the pineapple ****tails, I sipped champagne to ensure I was feeling as relaxed as possible. Champagne just makes EVERYTHING better, IMO...! 

I also brought along can of whipped topping when we headed to the bedroom that evening, and if my memory serves me there was a bottle of chocolate syrup involved. He thought it was nuts, but loved every moment of it. Its funny, because my guy hates sticky stuff - I mean, this man eats chicken wings and ribs with a knife and fork because he doesn't want to feel stickiness on his hands! And that's just for starters. So I wasn't sure how he was going to react to where I was intending to go with the whipped cream and chocolate sauce... but, let me tell you, he made no objections! "Whatever you need to do baby...!" was his attitude when he discovered what I was up to. 

Anyway, all of that got me over my concern about unpleasant taste and enabled me to just go for it regardless of all the stuff I'd heard other women say. It was actually a very enjoyable experience, I let him come in my mouth that very first time, and it was amazing for both of us. After that I just wanted to do it again, and again, and again  He gets it anytime he wants it (which is basically all the time ) because I love doing it. And there has never been any further need for the whipped cream, chocolate sauce, champagne or pineapple ****tails! (Although sometimes we still do the latter two - just because!). It all served its purpose in getting me over any apprehension, after which I decided it just wasn't needed. 

So, yes, for a woman who doesn't like the taste, or fears she will not, pineapple juice should definitely improve it. 

Also, my guy keeps himself meticulously clean. He showers every day, and if he has any reason to suspect he may not be 100% fresh he insists on hopping under the shower really quick before hand. Being really clean is huge in helping to ensure there isn't unpleasant taste and that its an enjoyable experience for your partner. 

So my advice to you is drink your pineapple juice (daily if she typically finds you salty), then choice a night and make a delectable experience out of it for both of you -- take a nice shower and get really clean, pour her some champagne (or whatever she prefers), get out the whipped cream and chocolate sauce...! She may turn out to be just like me and discover that she has such a good time, she;s ready to do it over and over again, anytime at the drop of a hat 

Without the pineapple juice, I'm not going to promise that there will be no taste, or that she'll love the natural taste. A lot of it has to do with the woman having the right attitude. Sometimes the natural taste on its own does requires a little getting used to. But its nothing unbearable and when you realize how much pleasure it brings your man, that far outweighs any slightly unusual taste you might detect. The turn on I get from turning him on has much more impact than anything about the taste. Using the above mentioned "condiments" in the way I described serves as a great icebreaker and hopefully she'll discover that she really likes to do it.

Do an internet search on which foods tend to make it bitter or salty, and be sure to avoid those in the lead up. Oh, and be sure to give her lots of positive feedback - knowing how amazing she makes you feel is enough in itself to want to make her enjoy it all the more and want to do it often!


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## askari (Jun 21, 2012)

My wife has never given me (or anyone else) a BJ. She thinks they are totally gross and I am a filthy pervert for asking her (years ago) to do it.

Funny she enjoys me going down on her....which I havent done for years now. Lost ALL interest.


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## I Notice The Details (Sep 15, 2012)

askari said:


> My wife has never given me (or anyone else) a BJ. She thinks they are totally gross and I am a filthy pervert for asking her (years ago) to do it.
> 
> Funny she enjoys me going down on her....which I havent done for years now. Lost ALL interest.


You've got to talk to her and explaln how it is just another way to show love and give pleasure to a man's body....just like you do to her body!

Did she have some bad experience with it before you got married?


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## askari (Jun 21, 2012)

Notice...I've tried telling her how it would make me feel...etc. Sadly we've gone way past that stage now. We live together like house mates.

I thought she may have had an 'issue' which was raised during counselling. She simply isnt interested in sex and doesnt see why she should do something she has no interest in.
No previous 'issues'.
Just asexual. She has missed out on an awful lot in life...but it was her choice. 
She could have embraced sex for the joy and bonding it brings. She decided not to.


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## melw74 (Dec 12, 2013)

No matter what you eat, shes still going to get the salty taste in her mouth, Unfortunately. Little bits of sperm still leaks out.

The reason why sperm tastes salty is due to the salt being part of the seminal fluid..... among other things, proteins, vitamins ( its very good for you).

You could try changing your diet, some people say try eating Pineapple, but i think that is just fallacy, you will still get the salty taste along with the numb throat.

Wearing condoms tho, that is really strange and not something i would consider, or even have thought of. At the end of the day shes either going to like Oral or hate it, that is just unfortunate, I cant see how you will change her mind if she hates the taste.


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## I Notice The Details (Sep 15, 2012)

askari said:


> Notice...I've tried telling her how it would make me feel...etc. Sadly we've gone way past that stage now. We live together like house mates.
> 
> I thought she may have had an 'issue' which was raised during counselling. She simply isnt interested in sex and doesnt see why she should do something she has no interest in.
> No previous 'issues'.
> ...



Wow, that is sad. I feel bad for the both of you. 

But, did you say she likes it when you give her oral pleasure?


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## askari (Jun 21, 2012)

I used to....but I stopped some years back because I got fed up with doing all teh giving and getting nothing back in return.

I know it shouldn't be 'conditional' etc....but when I was doing things that made her feel good and she simply refused to do things that would make me feel good...its a two way street.
So I stopped. Thing is, she has never asked me why I stopped doing it...


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## magenta (Feb 20, 2014)

How about asking her if she has any sexual fantasies? (You might learn something interesting!) Usually, this will lead her to ask, "What about you?" That is your opportunity to tell her. If she doesn't ask, you'll just have to volunteer the info while on the topic. 

That is how I recently learned that my H desired this as well. I didn't know it was something he really wanted.


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## vcard (Nov 30, 2012)

Thanks for the replies everyone!

I talked to my wife about this briefly. She said she has no issue with it, and the last time it was done she wasn't feeling well. She said she would be willing to try it another time.

Now...to not ruin it...a few questions:

1. Pineapple - many sources indicate this is the way to go - but how long before the act? hours? the entire day?

2. Should I get some flavored lube to help ease into this territory? She said "we have some flavored condoms", but I mentioned that using those makes me feel disconnected... maybe flavored lube could be used to start?


Thanks again


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## over20 (Nov 15, 2013)

IDK about the lube...I don't like it...I prefer his natural taste. You could stock up though maybe she would love it.

We have used chocolate flavored condoms for fun once....I did like that taste.

good luck!!


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## vcard (Nov 30, 2012)

WorkingOnMe said:


> I'm sure this timid approach of yours is adorable for a starry eyed virgin. But long term it doesn't bode well for your sex life. At some point your young bride will start to crave having a Man (tm). And you'll need to put on your big boy britches and take over.


True, but I also don't want to come across as a jerk. 

What does (tm) mean?


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## usmarriedguy (Dec 9, 2013)

I would say that you need to find out what the best solution for her is. You could also try several different food products.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

"I would love if you went down on me. It really turns me on when you do that."


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## 6301 (May 11, 2013)

A friend of mine told me that oral sex in his house was when his wife would be talking to him and explaining why he wasn't getting any that night.


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## carpenoctem (Jul 4, 2012)

magenta said:


> *That is how I recently learned that my H desired this as well. I didn't know it was something he really wanted.*



With due respect,
what you also did not know was: you were the only woman EVER alive on Planet Earth who did not know that EVERY man ever alive (and past five years of age) wanted it. 

*Not to individually denigrate anyone, but just to illustrate a point: If Hi….y had offered it to Ah… …. ….jad, Iranian nuclear sites would have long been McDonalds outlets.*


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## GIM003 (Feb 5, 2014)

NotTooSure said:


> This is exactly the way I thought too... and my marriage became sexless. Back on track now because I am acting like a "jerk", of course she doesn't think so... she loves it (I just think I am acting like one, which is my problem). You definitely are very self conscious about how you think your partner feels. My sincere advice would be to just ask her and talk to her. Most importantly make sure you understand what she says and don't make assumptions about what she is saying. Just because of the taste it might not be a deal breaker for her, it might just be something YOU need to get over. If she has to have a drink or rinse her mouth, may not mean she doesn't like doing it, just let her have one and move on.
> 
> I know not everyone is the same but being to nice and considerate was a major problem for both me and my wife.


:iagree:
This is/was my wife and me.
Channel your concerns about being a jerk into romancing your wife and being a better husband.


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