# In general, are 'Gut feelings' usually right.



## duckman (Sep 15, 2009)

I've just got a gut feeling like my W is still lieing to me. Just wondering what your opinions were.


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## AFEH (May 18, 2010)

Go with your gut feeling, but find out for certain. It means snooping which I didn't do, wish I had. Just don't get caught.

Bob


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## iamnottheonlyone (May 9, 2010)

You bet. But let me warn. Keep your cool. Think about what you will do and say now when it turns out you are right. If you ask her to leave, it is much tougher to recover your relationship. So be sure that's what you want. I didn't snoop either and was in complete denial with pink elephant in the room. Very typical. Even if there is no confirmation, your radar is telling you there is a problem that you need to take care of. Long term. Serious problem. If you do not want to confront, then sit down and have a talk about improving your situation. What ever you just did (probably nothing) apologize. Get on the same page. It is never too late. keep us informed. Save your marriage.


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## Quads123 (May 27, 2010)

iamnottheonlyone said:


> You bet. But let me warn. Keep your cool. Think about what you will do and say now when it turns out you are right. If you ask her to leave, it is much tougher to recover your relationship. So be sure that's what you want. I didn't snoop either and was in complete denial with pink elephant in the room. Very typical. Even if there is no confirmation, your radar is telling you there is a problem that you need to take care of. Long term. Serious problem. If you do not want to confront, then sit down and have a talk about improving your situation. What ever you just did (probably nothing) apologize. Get on the same page. It is never too late. keep us informed. Save your marriage.


^ This

stay cool and remove your emotions when sifting thru this. You can make more out of a situation than you realize.


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## nice777guy (Nov 23, 2009)

I was thinking about this a lot over the weekend.

I think we get those "gut feelings" when our sub-conscious is processing information - dates, times, stories, behaviors - and it comes back to tell us that things aren't quite making sense.

So yes - follow your gut. At least keep your eyes and ears open a little wider than normal and start asking a few more questions when things don't make sense.


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## newport428 (May 30, 2010)

My 2 cents.
I had gut feeling recently. Still not sure why somthing just seemed off. Started digging and gut proved to be right. I agree with the suggestion of planning your reaction if you do in fact find something. You'll still feel like a truck hit you but at least you will have Idea how you want to react.
--D


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## 2Daughters (May 13, 2010)

I want to believe my 'gut feeling' after reading the text 'I can't wait till your inside me'..of course he is just 'a friend' and she was just joking at 10:45pm..but who really knows?:scratchhead:


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## AZMOMOFTWO (Jun 30, 2008)

I've learned to trust my gut feelings. I ignored them before. If you are not normally a suspicious person then you're sensing something not right. Doesn't mean she is cheating could mean she's keeping something from you, thinking she will make it worse by revealing.


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

Vibes or "gut feelings" are usually right. We get into trouble when we live in denial and don't listen to them.


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## jessi (Feb 11, 2009)

My mom always used to say to me, that little voice inside your head is always trying to protect you, so listen to it.......stay calm and think out what your plan will be ahead of time.....
If you find something it will hurt.......stay strong......


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## whynot (Apr 16, 2010)

It is my belief that the "gut feeling" is God. He is guiding us all the time... have you ever noticed when you dont follow your gut you end up in a whirlwind? Follow your gut, listen to God. The difficulty is when we try to interpret the gut feeling in a way that makes sense to us, not take it for what it really is. You have to train yourself to listen to what it is and weed out what we try to define it with. God leads us to many things we dont understand why at all... but the path is laid for us if we choose to listen and follow. Most of us take long detours not wanting to take God's path. But, He already knows that and thus the detours become part of the path...


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## picket fences (Mar 22, 2010)

I'm a logical, thinking person who lives in my head most of the time. I did not believe in gut feeling, intuition, etc, for most of my adult life. When my H said he was leaving and things just did not add up, my gut SCREAMED that there was something else going on. I listened to it for the first time, and after two and a half months - and, yes, some fairly light snooping - I ended up being validated and confirmed. My gut was not only right, it was terrifyingly accurate about every little thing. So, from a very recent sceptic, I say, GO WITH THE GUT. But be prepared for what it might show you......


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## sunflower (Dec 15, 2008)

I dunno I had anxiety mixed in and that can be deceving


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## Sadman (Feb 25, 2010)

In the past six months since I discovered my wife`s two online affairs, I`ve had plenty of gut feelings and after a fair amount of snooping, they turned out to be what I thought they were!


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## 2Daughters (May 13, 2010)

Sorry to hear Sadman..any hope of forgiveness?..sometimes modern technology can be a real marriage killer if we allow it to.


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## Sadman (Feb 25, 2010)

2Daughters said:


> Sorry to hear Sadman..any hope of forgiveness?..sometimes modern technology can be a real marriage killer if we allow it to.


I`m very forgiving and was very trusting, we are working at it, up and down days, thanks for asking!


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## Hambo (Jun 4, 2010)

Absolutely!! my gut feelings have always been dead on. Collect evidence and dont let emotions take over, haha in all serious... masterbate, the moment after u finish ur head is clear and you can think the best i think. Good luck brother


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

whynot said:


> It is my belief that the "gut feeling" is God. He is guiding us all the time... have you ever noticed when you dont follow your gut you end up in a whirlwind? Follow your gut, listen to God. The difficulty is when we try to interpret the gut feeling in a way that makes sense to us, not take it for what it really is. You have to train yourself to listen to what it is and weed out what we try to define it with. God leads us to many things we dont understand why at all... but the path is laid for us if we choose to listen and follow. Most of us take long detours not wanting to take God's path. But, He already knows that and thus the detours become part of the path...


:iagree: Very well said


I just wished I had figured that out much earlier in life


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## wifeinlove (Apr 29, 2010)

nice777guy said:


> I was thinking about this a lot over the weekend.
> 
> I think we get those "gut feelings" when our sub-conscious is processing information - dates, times, stories, behaviors - and it comes back to tell us that things aren't quite making sense.
> 
> So yes - follow your gut. At least keep your eyes and ears open a little wider than normal and start asking a few more questions when things don't make sense.


well put. I think gut feelings are us subconsciously processing information. Our minds often detect things we dont consciously process... leaves us with a weird sort of "things aren't quite right" feeling.

Unfortunately, my husband always lied to me so I didnt start to notice anything different. So just because you dont have a gut feeling doesnt mean all is well.

Also, if you are paranoid/anxious type of person that tends to over-analyse situations... sometimes you can get "gut feelings" about everything because you tend to misintepret your own anxiety.


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## BrokenTrust (Mar 8, 2009)

I had that "gut feeling" about my wife and a friend of ours for about a year. I often asked my wife about it. She said nothing was wrong and nothing was going on. There was no reason not to believe her, it was just a feeling I had, nothing more. I believed her and kept ignoring the gut feeling. One day she left her laptop on and her email account was signed on. So I looked and found nothing unusual, but it was that feeling something was wrong. So I dug deeper into her emails and found out what was really going on. That day I died on the inside. Emails going back for a year that made me sick. If only I had followed my gut feelings from the beginning, who knows?

It's been about 16 months since I found the emails and it still bothers me.

Good luck


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## losinglove (Dec 8, 2009)

I think they can lead you in the right direction. If I had gone with my "gut feeling" I could have cut my wife's affair, and my hurt, shorter by three or four months. But...I was thinking "she would never do that".


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## 2Daughters (May 13, 2010)

me too man, me too..sucks doesn't it...especially when you got kids like me.


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## iamnottheonlyone (May 9, 2010)

Were we in denial or blind? A friend of mine said that it was "normalcy bias". Sometimes the mind can not handle and process the most dangerous information. An explanation is offered and we accept it because the truth would be beyond our range of comprehension. When I saw the "lovemaking" marks on my wife, I knew what they were. I was concerned for the obvious "injury" and asked her how it happened. She gave me an unreasonable explanation and I accepted it. Now I know why. I could not accept the truth, which I certainly knew. I just went on without further discussion and put it out of my mind.


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## AFEH (May 18, 2010)

Yes. The only way forward to some sort of understanding and "acceptance" when the gut feeling occurs is to get ready to believe the unbelievable.

Bob


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