# For women - speeding up our orgasms



## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

I'm on a quest to speed me up when I'm with my husband. When he does me, it can take 30 min to climax, and of course, that just becomes a chore. It would to me, too! 

In way of background, I think I am in the normal range, maybe a bit faster than average. When I masturbate, I usually take 10 min, but it could be less or more. 10 min is the most common.
With the Eroscillator vibrator, I can come in 90 sec, 3 min max! Every time. So in 1/3 the time. It is not your typical vibrator. It oscillates, instead of vibrates, and is the only vibrator endorsed by Dr. Ruth. I bought it here.
Eroscillator Top 2 Deluxe Vibrator - Sex Toys at Good Vibrations - GoodVibes.com


Since I got it, I tried to use it once during intercourse, but we were doggy style and his thrusting felt so good, I was distracted. In that position, I could not get a good feeling on my clit. I think if I get on top and use this vibrator, I could come while he is inside me. If I take too long, he will be either finished or have lost his erection, so I need to speed myself up.

I also found I can come faster when sitting, than when lying down. 

I know my guy, as much as he loves me, does not want the hassle of a long ordeal working on me every time. He is content to just let me skip my climax when he is in a hurry. He has no problem with that. I can't say I blame him. That's why I don't even try when we only have time for a quickie, but if I can get myself going fast, then I could try for an orgasm also when we don't have much time.

So for the ladies, does anyone have any tips on how to speed ourselves up, or how do your husbands deal with this?


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## lovelieswithin (Apr 29, 2010)

I was watching a british sex documentary about this chick that said she could orgasm without being touched and strictly with her mind- she proved it in a medical study! ive been trying to develop the skill as well since I too either take too long or need perfect clitoral stimulation manually. Now my sensations down there are increasing the more I relax and basically sexually meditate/relax with deep breathing. Oxygen is also key to orgasm as your oxygen supply needs to be high in order to climax. some women forget this and have irregular breathing during sex or even hold their breath making it more difficult. I find using a hot towel to warm myself up before sex works great and then I dont let hubby on until he is FULLY ready to go!  try some fantasizing, breathing and mental focus: envision it happening or even "watch" the action... all of these tricks help me out a ton!!! good luck!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Crypsys (Apr 22, 2010)

Oh wow, I really need to go give my wife a huge hug and thanks! 90% of the time orally or with my figers she climaxes in less then 5 min. If I use a vibe, it can be just a minute or two. I guess I really am a lucky guy!!!


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

My husband noticed that when I want to achieve my orgasms, I tighten my vagina's muscle. I don't know if you have noticed that. In Chinese brothels, girls are taught to do that. It makes their xxxxx tight and and more enjoyable for men. I don't know how I got it, just naturally, maybe. I can't come if I am relaxed. I have to tighten my muscle and create sexual scenes in my mind, and plus my husband's toy. These three together speed everything up.


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## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

Yes, the Kegel exercises speed it up for me too. On the other hand, when he was doing oral on me, to speed it up, I did the opposite of Kegels, I pushed out, and it sped me up quite a bit. I also like to fantasize that someone is watching me, but when he is there I don't fantasize as I am thinking about him. It seems fantasy and concentration is important to women. Men have it so easy!!

Kneeling position makes it faster too.

When he stimulates me, if he moves even a little bit, I lose it and have to start all over. That is why I can come faster when I do it myself. He can't tell if he is moving a tiny bit. It's not that there is only 1 good spot, it's that I need constant stimulation on whatever spot it is, and it better not move as I'm building up.

On the breathing, no, that does not matter to me. I can come fast when I almost hold my breath so the vibrator would not move, and I came in 90 sec.


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## tjohnson (Mar 10, 2010)

lovelieswithing makes some great suggestions/observations that warrant attentions: 

A hot/wet washcloth is helpful as is a bath/shower. Applying moisture does something to make the area more sensitive which will likely make you respond quicker. That said best not to have your husband join you as this may speed him up too. 

The other notion is mental/visual stimulation. Perhaps you could fantisize or whatever does it for you (even in the tub) to get y our motor running. 

Personally, I have found that if i am stimulated mentally/visually prior to any manual stimulation (intercourse, oral, touching) the time that it takes me to climax is greatly reduced. This is true even when the stimulation is subtle enought that it does not produce an erection (or a full one). 

Have fun-good luck. 

which you indicates gets things moving for you.


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## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

I am always aroused and wet before we get started.

This is the weird thing. Yesterday I used my favorite vibrator with him watching me (which was so great, a real turn-on), and it took me 15 min! I can't figure out why it takes me longer when he is there. I think it could be because I am distracted. I can come the fastest when I am just focused on the sensation and thoughts in my head. That is why I cannot have the TV on. When he touches me, it feels so good and I get distracted. Aargggh, help, what can I do?


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## Dave321 (Aug 4, 2010)

:smthumbup:It sound like you mite have little trust issue with him.Also its be none that women have a habit of disconnecting from use of toys,cause they give a feeling like no other.Manual stimulation takes a little long if not in the mood,Short time using toy,vibrations 3,000 rpm.Some body watching,well wonder what they mite think,being afraid of rejection = hard to cum.Turn your brain off,go with what you feel ,if you can open.Star kissing, rubbing,search out each other body.Then tell him to eat you,but each time you want to cum don't, and do this until you can't stand it, then tell that Big O STUD MUFFIN GET AT IT.You should cum fairly sooner then you do.Give the toy a break.And give you two a Chane.It takes time.A lot of good people on here with great words to listen too.


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