# want to look at porn



## Deepdivered (Dec 14, 2011)

so I really feel tempted to view porn. mainly just pictures. 

my wife and I work opisit scheduals so I only see her like 20 mins a day. on Sunday we shear that day off and Monday I see her after work till I go to bed.

I realy enjoy seeing and feeling my wifes breasts but for the most part she don't let me unless we are having sex and that only happens like once a week.

so when I am not with her and I feeling horny I get tempted to view porn. but for moral and religious reason I refrain most of the time. I have justified looking at a few pics of pirced nipples cuss my wife has them and I trying to pick out some cute jewelry for her and I have looked at some pics to get ideas.


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## TheCuriousWife (Jan 28, 2013)

This is something to discuss with your wife.

Tell her how you feel, she may be okay with it, she may not. Explain how you are tempted, and see if you can come up with a solution.

Personally I would not be okay with it. But I would also not be okay with sex only once a week. So everyone is different. 

It's something that needs to be figured out between you two.


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## CuddleBug (Nov 26, 2012)

Porn is very addictive, and it starts with pictures and goes from there.

I would find another job or she does, so you both work day shifts, spending time together.

You can talk to her about it and see how she reacts.

I reluctantly look at porn too, movies, etc. but only when I'm really in the mood and my wifee hasn't been in a long time. That hasn't happened the last few months now because we took the 5 love languages quiz together and now really know each others need(s). Made a huge difference for us.

Home | The 5 Love Languages®

For now, even if you both get 30 minutes together, have quickie sex.


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## mablenc (Feb 26, 2013)

I'm sorry but I have to ask, how can you not watch porn for religious reason, yet your wife has nipple piercing?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Deepdivered (Dec 14, 2011)

lol mablenc well we decided we both wanted them so I have them to. I agree more time together be better. we are working on opening an in home daycare for her for that very reason. she usualy does not want sex befor work cuss she does not want to smell like sperm. and when she gets off work I am asleep cuss I work erly and if she wakes me up I be so sleepy on my drive to work that I have fallen asleep driving and wreked on the freeway. we have talked about porn. at first she didn't care but I said I didn't won't to cuss I think its wrong. that was when we had ben maried 2 years and almost all her bf's looked at it and so did most the guys in her family. she said there for she didn't care. I said well our church tells use god don't want us to so I decided not to. a few years later it came up again and she said she relized now if I where to look at it it would hurt her. so ya I still want to and wish it was ok but refrain for thoughs reasons.


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## ScarletBegonias (Jun 26, 2012)

Deepdivered said:


> lol mablenc well we decided we both wanted them so I have them to. I agree more time together be better. we are working on opening an in home daycare for her for that very reason. she usualy does not want sex befor work cuss she does not want to smell like sperm.seriously? that's a reason? How strong is your sperm?? LOL and when she gets off work I am asleep cuss I work erly and if she wakes me up I be so sleepy on my drive to work that I have fallen asleep driving and wreked on the freeway. we have talked about porn. at first she didn't care but I said I didn't won't to cuss I think its wrong. that was when we had ben maried 2 years and almost all her bf's looked at it and so did most the guys in her family. she said there for she didn't care. I said well our church tells use god don't want us to so I decided not to. a few years later it came up again and she said she relized now if I where to look at it it would hurt her. so ya I still want to and wish it was ok but refrain for thoughs reasons.


So originally she said she was ok with it and now she isn't? Would she be open to doing pics of herself for you to look at when she isn't available for sex?


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## Deepdivered (Dec 14, 2011)

ya its strong smelling. but we have used condoms to fix that for quickies befor her work. usualy when I get home though we sit down for dinner as a family. we both enjoy sex with eachother and want to do it more often its just hard to get the time with current schedules. ya I have taken pictures of her but I deleted them cuss I was woried of people who shouldn't see them doing so on accident.


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## ScarletBegonias (Jun 26, 2012)

Deepdivered said:


> ya its strong smelling. but we have used condoms to fix that for quickies befor her work. usualy when I get home though we sit down for dinner as a family. we both enjoy sex with eachother and want to do it more often its just hard to get the time with current schedules. ya I have taken pictures of her but I deleted them cuss I was woried of people who shouldn't see them doing so on accident.


try a photo privacy app.

For the sperm smell,still can't get over that it's so strongly scented,go buy her some Fresh n Sexy wipes from Playtex. She can use them after sex.


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## TheCuriousWife (Jan 28, 2013)

"Sex smell" I hear often.

My husband claims that after we have sex, he can smell it on himself for a long time. So he likes to shower after, and he doesn't like to have sex before we go places. 

He thinks they will be able to smell him and tell me had sex.

Frankly I can't smell anything, unless maybe he was naked and you were pressing your nose to his crotch...

Besides the fact that I think it smells good.... :scratchhead:

But anyway, yeah. There are some spouses out there that don't like the smell.


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## ScarletBegonias (Jun 26, 2012)

I can't ever smell DH. 

He says he only smells me sometimes and he's sad it isn't all the time LOL


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## CuddleBug (Nov 26, 2012)

Hope this helps you.



" *How to Eliminate Sperm Smell:

Remove or reduce pollutants from your diet. Common pollutants are cigarettes, cigars, alcoholic beverages, recreational drugs, and caffeine. These pollutants, when used in excess, will change the way sperm smell. Reducing the amount of caffeine and alcohol consumed while completely removing drugs or tobacco products will improve the odor of sperm.
Increase your daily fluid intake and avoid dehydration. Lack of hydration is often a factor in sperm odor. Drinking at least 34 ounces of water a day will flush pollutants from the body, eliminating sperm smell. Drinking fruit juices, such as cranberry or pineapple, also will help eliminate unpleasant sperm odor.
Remove strong-smelling foods and herbs from your diet. Certain foods and herbs with strong smells will actually affect the odor of body secretions. Garlic, onions, and asparagus are three things that should be avoided whenever possible. This includes large amounts of garlic salts and powders or minced onion seasonings.
Increase consumption of foods and herbs that are known to eliminate or improve the smell of sperm. Celery, parsley, and green tea are all cleansing. When consumed, they reduce bad sperm odors. Oranges and pineapples can help make sperm odor pleasant.
Check for results in 24 to 48 hours. Most men experience a significant reduction in sperm smell after 24 hours of proper hydration and diet change. Men who are reducing or completely stopping tobacco or drug use often will not see results for one to two weeks. If this period of time elapses and no significant improvement is noted, consult your doctor. Persistent sperm odor can be a symptom of a more significant medical problem.* "

Men's Health - Sperm Smell



And sending you sexy pics of herself......great idea.:smthumbup:


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## Deepdivered (Dec 14, 2011)

She almost never sends me pics. She used to on a rare occasion but now dose not. She done want to leave our 2 year old alone to and dissent want to from work. She works in a group home with people with mental disability. We have wanted to get the wipes but honestly I do not think It will do much cuss sperm is still up there and slowly comes out for a while. I can take pics of her. But she is pregnant right now and I not sure she will want to. In the past the images got kinda old and boring after a while. I would need to add to them here and there to keep it entertaining


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## TheCuriousWife (Jan 28, 2013)

Deepdivered said:


> We have wanted to get the wipes but honestly I do not think It will do much cuss sperm is still up there and slowly comes out for a while.
> 
> *Panty Liners are a great invention...*
> 
> ...


I think there are much deeper issues here than porn use.


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## clipclop2 (Aug 16, 2013)

My husband's scent lingers on me but i like it. Still, a quick wipe should handle it so I tend to think it is am excuse rather than a reason. 

Once per week is not a lot to me and I believe more frequent sex is even more important when a could are apart so much. 

What can be done about the work shifts? 

Honestly, if you are that horny you don't need porn to relieve the urge. Just M and be done with it.


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## CuddleBug (Nov 26, 2012)

TheCuriousWife said:


> I think there are much deeper issues here than porn use.



Agreed.


I think they both should do the 5 love languages quiz and compare the results. This way they'll know what each others true need(s) are. If it turns out his need is Physical, she will know. If it turns out her need is not Physical, he will know. Should help.

The sperm smell is taken care of with the above post.

My wifee has never complained to me, your sperm smells. She has told me, it doesn't taste great after she gives me a BJ and swallows, but having fruits and no meats or alcohol does help. I remember being at a party with her and I only ate fruit for supper and the evening, went to bed and she gave me a BJ in the morning and said it tasted almost sweet and pleasant. But I still went one step further and have her fav drink chocolate Almond milk ready for afterwards and no more issues.


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## Deepdivered (Dec 14, 2011)

Curious wife I did not say I do not like images of my wife. That's not what I mean. I saying the same five images of my wife I had in my phone for 2 years stopped being as fun to look at. I wanted new ones but got worried people my see them so I deleted them. It's not that she don't like the smell of sex she just worries people at work will smell it and make comments like I know what you did etc. but some times we would have a Quickie and use a condom so there not as much smell. U still can smell the latex and her scent though. But we also have a 2 year old so if she is awake we don't want to leave her alone while we go have a quicky. So when I get home we usually eat dinner together and then she leaves. Some times she has to meet me at work and we trade baby and she has to finish her drive to work and that's all the time we had together that day. We both enjoy sex together a lot and love one another a lot, we just have very little time together cuss of work schedule and it makes it hard to be intamet and some times before she leaves we have a long kiss and when I alone I am way horny and sense she is now gone for the day I start thinking to look at porn. That's what Is going on nothing more. We actually don't even meet at home any more after work. She meets me at my job and we go get fast food then she leaves cuss she don't have time to get to work if she waits for me to get home cuss we just moved and the new house is farther away.


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## AliceA (Jul 29, 2010)

I'd consider a change of job so that you can both see each other more often over starting down the slippery porn slope. If it was just watching a movie here and there, it probably wouldn't be that big an issue, but from what I've read, it's very easy to become addicted to it and it becoming a big problem for the other partner.

Sometimes we feel like we don't have choices in regards to their jobs, but I think it's more that people are afraid to try. If she's pregnant, I assume she'll take some time off after giving birth. Maybe one of you could decide to work less hours after that so you can see each other more?


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## Deepdivered (Dec 14, 2011)

*Re: Re: want to look at porn*



breeze said:


> I'd consider a change of job so that you can both see each other more often over starting down the slippery porn slope. If it was just watching a movie here and there, it probably wouldn't be that big an issue, but from what I've read, it's very easy to become addicted to it and it becoming a big problem for the other partner.
> 
> Sometimes we feel like we don't have choices in regards to their jobs, but I think it's more that people are afraid to try. If she's pregnant, I assume she'll take some time off after giving birth. Maybe one of you could decide to work less hours after that so you can see each other more?


I know you are right. I am an x porn addict from back in jr high/high school. it still tempts me to this day and I am almost 30 now. I bet if I never looked at it back then I would not feel these temptations now. I also think if we had more time together it wouldn't be as much of a temptation either. 

but yes we are working on getting her a new job. we submitted an application for her to open an in home day care last week.


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## clipclop2 (Aug 16, 2013)

I kind of understand her concern that others might perceive there scent. But it isn't likely. 

I consider the same thing but it is probably more about me than reality 

Look. Have sex with her. She is married. Married women have sex with their husbands. 

Wipe.

The problem isnnot the smell of sex. 
Two theories

She wants to attract someone else or 

She has much deeper issues about sex 

If you're trying to keep someone out of your garden you might use bob cat urine or any other kind of predators. I'm not normal but for me the scent of my husband on me is protective. 

I'm in a professional industry. Multi national government regulated. Stupid, true. 

It could just as easily be seen as the scent of my husband on me is provocative.

All I know is I don't quite get what your wife's beef is 

I don't even get what I'm talking about other than I recognize a scent of my husband on me.

I'm married, we have sex. I think that's pretty normal. I'm not doing it to attract males and if I wanted to erase the sent it would take 10 seconds to do so. 

Something just doesn't ring true here and I suggest you pursue this.


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## over20 (Nov 15, 2013)

Deepdivered said:


> lol mablenc well we decided we both wanted them so I have them to. I agree more time together be better. we are working on opening an in home daycare for her for that very reason. she usualy does not want sex befor work cuss she does not want to smell like sperm. and when she gets off work I am asleep cuss I work erly and if she wakes me up I be so sleepy on my drive to work that I have fallen asleep driving and wreked on the freeway. we have talked about porn. at first she didn't care but I said I didn't won't to cuss I think its wrong. that was when we had ben maried 2 years and almost all her bf's looked at it and so did most the guys in her family. she said there for she didn't care. I said well our church tells use god don't want us to so I decided not to. a few years later it came up again and she said she relized now if I where to look at it it would hurt her. so ya I still want to and wish it was ok but refrain for thoughs reasons.



Something isn't right here....:scratchhead::scratchhead::scratchhead:


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## Deepdivered (Dec 14, 2011)

You all seen quick to call some one is cheating. Not the case here for sure.

my wife is just sensitive about smells. if she thinks she does not smell good she will go right to the shower even if its like her second shower for the day. she always wants to smell good. she also is woried about getting made fun of for smelling like sex at work. but like I said curently we don't even meet up at home after my work. she meets me in the parking lot at my job to give me our baby and then heads to work. 

I know here on tam its hard to not go straight to claming some one is cheating but I asure you this is not the case. its actualy a case where some one actualy means what they say. my wife does not avoid having sex with me. if she could she would every day. honestly her drive is more than mine. to shed some light on that. she took some days off work for the holidays and we made love every one of thoughs days 1-2 times each day lol hence I said she is pregnant again.

I only posted on her to exsplain why I am feeling tempted to view porn and get some suport to not do it and see how others delt with the same temptation. I am not at all woried about my wife not being faithfull to me, she can't get enough of me and shows me lots of love and attention and that's why I want to be good to her and not view porn.


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## Deepdivered (Dec 14, 2011)

*Re: Re: want to look at porn*



clipclop2 said:


> I kind of understand her concern that others might perceive there scent. But it isn't likely.
> 
> I consider the same thing but it is probably more about me than reality
> 
> ...


she works with people with metal handy capes and a lot of the staff there are.....how to say this, street kids. they talk dirty a lot and she feels they will smell it and mention it and she would be embaresed and it would be infron of the people with handy cap and they would drag it out. they have done it to one of the staff before and she was there. I to used to work there and know most of the staff and its true they are like that.


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## ecotime47 (Apr 3, 2013)

Deepdivered said:


> You all seen quick to call some one is cheating. Not the case here for sure.
> 
> my wife is just sensitive about smells. if she thinks she does not smell good she will go right to the shower even if its like her second shower for the day. she always wants to smell good. she also is woried about getting made fun of for smelling like sex at work. but like I said curently we don't even meet up at home after my work. she meets me in the parking lot at my job to give me our baby and then heads to work.
> 
> ...


I hear what you're saying bro. Porn addiction is a real struggle for so many men. If you're not careful, it can ruin your marriage. I applaud you looking for help with this struggle.

You should check out Pure Intimacy - Recovering the Heart of Sexuality. It is a site designed to help you understand the temptation of porn and fight through it. I hope you will find it helpful. Good luck!


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## MissScarlett (May 22, 2013)

I don't know that it was being implied that your wife was cheating so much as it sounds like an excuse to not have sex.

Having said that - life is full of things that we need to use moderation in or say no to. I'd like to buy a new living room set. I'd like to drink alcohol all day. I'd like to never go to the gym. I'd like to eat a whole cheesecake. Etc. 

Just like anything else - we divert our attention. We channel our energy elsewhere. We remind ourselves we aren't going to feel good about ourselves if we lose control.


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## Deepdivered (Dec 14, 2011)

*Re: Re: want to look at porn*



ecotime47 said:


> I hear what you're saying bro. Porn addiction is a real struggle for so many men. If you're not careful, it can ruin your marriage. I applaud you looking for help with this struggle.
> 
> You should check out Pure Intimacy - Recovering the Heart of Sexuality. It is a site designed to help you understand the temptation of porn and fight through it. I hope you will find it helpful. Good luck!


Thank you. I'll check it out.


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## Deepdivered (Dec 14, 2011)

*Re: Re: want to look at porn*



MissScarlett said:


> I don't know that it was being implied that your wife was cheating so much as it sounds like an excuse to not have sex.
> 
> Having said that - life is full of things that we need to use moderation in or say no to. I'd like to buy a new living room set. I'd like to drink alcohol all day. I'd like to never go to the gym. I'd like to eat a whole cheesecake. Etc.
> 
> Just like anything else - we divert our attention. We channel our energy elsewhere. We remind ourselves we aren't going to feel good about ourselves if we lose control.


so true. for me this has to be a no. I know id get very drawn in as I was befor. it took 3 years of strugling to quit to suckseed. after that it was easy to stay away from it. I was saving sex for marriage so I just pushed that stuff out of my minde. now that I am married and sex is a part of my life the temptations come back and some times there very strong.


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## CaliRN (Jan 2, 2010)

Look at porn, just don't be stupid about it or get addicted


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## Deepdivered (Dec 14, 2011)

*Re: Re: want to look at porn*



CaliRN said:


> Look at porn, just don't be stupid about it or get addicted


I was addicted to it in the past. so if I indulge in it again I sure ill end up the same as I was then. I also re talked to my wife about it and she said ya she would be hurt if I where looking at other women. I love her so I will respect her wishes and I just know if I do it it will turn out bad for me as a person. also I want to be true to my faith and our church teaches us we should not look at it. "if a man looketh at another women to lust after her he hath comited adultery in his heart"


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## clipclop2 (Aug 16, 2013)

*Re: Re: want to look at porn*



Deepdivered said:


> she works with people with metal handy capes and a lot of the staff there are.....how to say this, street kids. they talk dirty a lot and she feels they will smell it and mention it and she would be embaresed and it would be infron of the people with handy cap and they would drag it out. they have done it to one of the staff before and she was there. I to used to work there and know most of the staff and its true they are like that.


Ok. I understand. 

How much time can you devote in between for a shower? If you both took one before she went to work and you went to sleep it might be really nice? 

She has a real point.

Another thought is that working with them is harming her feeling that sex within a loving relationship is good. 

Ask her about that. 

Working with situations where good is warped can confuse people. 

Her job is challenging. If she feels deeply it might not be a good fit long term.


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## Deepdivered (Dec 14, 2011)

*Re: Re: want to look at porn*



clipclop2 said:


> Ok. I understand.
> 
> How much time can you devote in between for a shower? If you both took one before she went to work and you went to sleep it might be really nice?
> 
> ...


ya we are opening a day care in home so soon that won't be a problem any more. we have no way to at present to make love cuss she meets me at work to drop off kid then continues on her way to work after we grad fast food. or she brings us food she made at home.


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## soulseer (Jul 26, 2013)

I think the OP can do whatever he and his wife agree is acceptable.

if he needs pics of her to enhance his masturbation - why not? 

If he gets a bit tired of those particular pics of his wife some new pics would do.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Deepdivered (Dec 14, 2011)

*Re: Re: want to look at porn*



soulseer said:


> I think the OP can do whatever he and his wife agree is acceptable.
> 
> if he needs pics of her to enhance his masturbation - why not?
> 
> ...


Ya I ultimately will decide with my wife what to do. I mostly wanted some examples of what others do to help avoid porn.

I never said anything about masturbating.


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## Gomerpyle (Dec 27, 2013)

Deepdivered said:


> I mostly wanted some examples of what others do to help avoid porn.


An odd question, really. You have to actively seek out porn in order to see it. 

So do you mean how to avoid the urges? If you whack off regularly then you aren't going to have those urges.


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## lunchbox1588 (Dec 30, 2013)

ScarletBegonias said:


> So originally she said she was ok with it and now she isn't? Would she be open to doing pics of herself for you to look at when she isn't available for sex?


This is a great idea. If you are looking for porn you can even go as far at photoing or filming you too together then you will have the action shots. My wife and I have done this and its great for the long periods of no sexy time!


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## Deepdivered (Dec 14, 2011)

*Re: Re: want to look at porn*



CuddleBug said:


> Porn is very addictive, and it starts with pictures and goes from there.
> 
> I would find another job or she does, so you both work day shifts, spending time together.
> 
> ...


I took the quiz and am now reading the book. it you haven't read it I really think you will like it. wife said she will take quiz and read book to.


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## larry.gray (Feb 21, 2011)

TheCuriousWife said:


> "Sex smell" I hear often.
> 
> My husband claims that after we have sex, he can smell it on himself for a long time. So he likes to shower after, and he doesn't like to have sex before we go places.
> 
> He thinks they will be able to smell him and tell me had sex.


Yeah, I can smell my wife for quite a while. But I LIKE IT. If anyone else recognizes the smell and knows.... what... that I had sex with the woman I've been married to for 20 years and have 4 children with, so what?

As far as someone else actually being able to tell, yeah, I've been able to tell a few times. Hint... guys... wash you face if your wife was very productive of lubricant.


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## ecotime47 (Apr 3, 2013)

Deepdivered said:


> I took the quiz and am now reading the book. it you haven't read it I really think you will like it. wife said she will take quiz and read book to.


That's so awesome. Great book! Every couple should read it.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

larry.gray said:


> Yeah, I can smell my wife for quite a while. But I LIKE IT. If anyone else recognizes the smell and knows.... what... that I had sex with the woman I've been married to for 20 years and have 4 children with, so what?
> 
> As far as someone else actually being able to tell, yeah, I've been able to tell a few times. Hint... guys... wash you face if your wife was very productive of lubricant.


The "had sex" smell is different than the "vagina scent".

If someone wants to ensure they don't have any scents after sex, I would fully bathe with soap and water and wash out your mouth.


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