# my husband says he doesnt love me anymore



## badtimes (Oct 18, 2009)

Hi there some advice needed please, i have been married to my 2nd husband for 7 years now and last year in november he qualified to be a driving instructor he is 44 after xmas i knew something just wasnt right the way he was acting with me, i even asked him outright was there someone else?

In March this year there was a knock on my door a young lad was stood there he said "im sorry to be the one to tell you this" that was it i even knew what he was goin to say to me turns out my husband had been teachin his girlfriend age 24 to drive and other things besides.

He denied it at first then he said it was just a kiss then it came out in the end he had had sex with her 3 times in the car i told him to leave, after 2 weeks he came back as i asked him too, i missed him so much he finished with the girl and said he loves me.

Now 7 months on are sex life has gone down the pan the doctor put him on citalopram tablets back in april and he keeps tellin me it must be the tablets then yesterday he tells me its not the tablets and he has just lost all feelings for me and that he loves me like a friend.

We went to see a marriage guidance back in april but he says there is no way he is goin back to see one again as he said she didnt tell us anythin we didnt already know.

He says to me he wishes he could feel the way he used to about me and he hopes it comes back. I hope for this also but i just feel so alone i dont really go out or have any friends, i dont want to talk to my parents as they will only worry.

The only person i have spoke to is my 17yr old daughter who is wonderful and is always tryin to cheer me up but i feel i shouldnt be piling all this on her.

I have 3 daughters 17, 13 are from my previous marriage and my 5 year old is with my husband at present.

Please any advice would be much appreciated i love my husband very much and to hear those words from him that he doesnt love me anymore are so painful, i have done nothing wrong but feel as if i have all i do is cry and lie in bed just praying for something good to happen.


----------



## dobo (Jun 30, 2009)

Get him off the Celexa. Try another antidepressant.

I'd bet $$ that it is the drug and not the marriage. If he hasn't talked to his doctor about this he hasn't tried everything. I'm surprised that the counselor didn't suggest a med change...


----------



## badtimes (Oct 18, 2009)

dobo said:


> Get him off the Celexa. Try another antidepressant.
> 
> I'd bet $$ that it is the drug and not the marriage. If he hasn't talked to his doctor about this he hasn't tried everything. I'm surprised that the counselor didn't suggest a med change...


Have spoke to him again he is willing to go and see the doctor again about the medication has anyone else been on citalopram 10mg and felt this way, can it really change the way you feel about somebody really hope it is that and we can back on track thanks for you reply


----------



## dobo (Jun 30, 2009)

Atholk said:


> admittedly if you're 44 nailing a 24 y/o is a massive ego boost no matter how good the marriage is. So... ?


That's nice that some men think this way.


----------



## lola_b (Aug 28, 2009)

I think the meds might be part of the problem, but also BOTH of your try reading "The Propert Care and Feeding of Marriage" by Dr. Laura Schlessinger. You may both identify with some of the behaviours she has in the book and how to try and change ourselves to become better partners. Sometimes, we don't realize the things we do hurt other people.

Best wishes to you both.


----------



## Loving Husband (Aug 3, 2009)

Meds are a problem in relationships. My wife both times went off deep end when she went on Anti-depressants. Both times I think causes of Post Pardom.. Now off them she thinks more clearly..


----------

