# How can I overcome this addiction?



## y3zalman (Feb 24, 2013)

Hi all, although I have a girlfriend. I am addicted to porn and women. Women, not so much as I don't sleep around its just I like to check them and fantasize about them (not in a creepy way).

The problem comes when me & my girlfriend are living together, I stop watching porn and checking other women on the internet but this effects my arousal in bed. I wish to get rid of these habits but don't know how. Also, my girl friend is beautiful but am I bored of her?


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## Acoa (Sep 21, 2012)

y3zalman said:


> I like to check them and fantasize about them (not in a creepy way).


For the record, it is in a creepy way. You need to admit that to yourself. All you are doing by minimizing is trying to give yourself permission that it's okay. It's not okay. You are using women as an object for your own pleasure (even if it's only in you mind). 

I know what you are going through I've been there. Growing up I got very mixed signals on porn. Mom thought is was repulsive, my Dad had a huge collection of some very kinky stuff. After my parents divorced, my mom married a very religious man. Even he had a subscription to playboy (for the article of course, pft.)

I got good at hiding it. It wasn't healthy for me or my marriage. I struggled with it for the past 22 years. I'm in a 12 step program now and breaking that and my other addictions. Once you commit to stopping it, you need to get support to keep you on track.

Make no mistake, you need to want to stop. If you don't want to stop, you won't. If you don't want to, let your girlfriend know now so she can leave. Don't hide it, trust me, that leads to a world of hurt for both of you.

If you do want to stop, get into a 12 step program. There are ones out there for sex addictions. Most 12 step programs work similarly. So if you can't find a sex one, try a few AA groups. Some work with other addictions, some only deal with booze. You need to check with the group to find out.


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## CallaLily (Jan 13, 2011)

If you really want help, then you might want to find a therapist who deals with or specializes in porn/sex addictions.


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## natureoflove (Jul 5, 2013)

y3zalman said:


> Hi all, although I have a girlfriend. I am addicted to porn and women. Women, not so much as I don't sleep around its just I like to check them and fantasize about them (not in a creepy way).
> 
> The problem comes when me & my girlfriend are living together, I stop watching porn and checking other women on the internet but this effects my arousal in bed. I wish to get rid of these habits but don't know how. Also, my girl friend is beautiful but am I bored of her?


maybe you can get arousal with masturbation
just have a try


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## Unique Username (Jul 6, 2013)

y3zalman said:


> Hi all, although I have a girlfriend. I am addicted to porn and women. Women, not so much as I don't sleep around its just I like to check them and fantasize about them (not in a creepy way).
> 
> The problem comes when me & my girlfriend are living together, I stop watching porn and checking other women on the internet but this effects my arousal in bed. I wish to get rid of these habits but don't know how. Also, my girl friend is beautiful but am I bored of her?


Hmmm

On Another thread you started you said you were married and have a daughter 

this thread is from July

the Married thread is August

Which is it?


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