# Lady, if you are married, would you allow other guys to touch your sensitive area?



## darkwing

Ladies, just out of curiosity, if you are married either happily or unhappily, would you allow another guy such as an ex or a close friend to touch your sensitive areas. NO, I am not talking about breasts and vagina. I am talking about holding your hands, rubbing your thigh, shoulder, back, etc.


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## arbitrator

*Ask my XW, why don't you? 

Immediately upon the day that our pre-planed "trial separation" began and I drove out of the driveway on that agreed-upon date, she refused to even let me try to touch her, even glancingly. Why just a few weeks prior to that date, she came home from one of her "weekend long" road trips when she came in the house and literally jumped my bones, making me feel as if there might be some form of second thoughts on her part regarding the separation. Far from it! The separation went right on ahead just as she had planned it!

Mystified by that suddenly adverse behavior of hers, I found out nearly a year later the real reason why: she had already been fastidiously sleeping with men from her past from out-of-town, for up to about 1-1/2 years prior to the separation itself!

And then coming back home to sleep with me as if absolutely nothing had ever happened between us!

Now as far as normal relations go, I am usually a hugger ~ but only to folks that I know really well. But if it's a wife of one of my friends or some lady who I know for a fact is married, I would only fleetingly/lightly hug them and then move cordially and quickly away, with no further touching. And reading their receptiveness to me, it could also even be something as simple as say, a soft handshake, or even a nod with a polite "Howdy!"

In any event, I would guess that I'm just all too respectful of married women!*


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## SimplyAmorous

darkwing said:


> Ladies, just out of curiosity, if you are married either happily or unhappily, would you allow another guy such as an ex or a close friend to touch your sensitive areas. NO, I am not talking about breasts and vagina.* I am talking about holding your hands, rubbing your thigh, shoulder, back, etc.*


No, this would be crossing an intimacy boundary....I would not be comfortable with it... male friends have hugged me in front of my husband , I don't see this as anything at all.. but alone, that sort of thing....Oh No.. that could have a snow balling effect... even in sorrow... a hug.. that's the limit.


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## Faithful Wife

There is a guy I work with who is sort of a touchy feely type. He doesn't seem to be a creep, he just seems a bit clueless. If he likes your shirt or your hair he might reach out to touch it while he's telling you that you look nice.

Some of the women he has worked with for many years seem to think this is ok and allow it, they aren't bothered by it at all.

For me, when I see him reaching toward me, I start moving backwards and shake my finger in his face and say "ah ah ah, no touchy". He laughs about this and seems to think I am just weird or something. 

Uh, no. Other men are not allowed to touch me.


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## Created2Write

Simply put, _no_.


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## Coffee Amore

No, I would feel very uncomfortable. It would cross a major boundary for me.

Hugging as a greeting is common in my culture. A very quick hug is ok and I don't have a problem with it since it's cultural over here. An extended hug wouldn't be ok.


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## Lyris

No. A quick hug on greeting for old/dear friends is okay.


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## AliceA

darkwing said:


> Ladies, just out of curiosity, if you are married either happily or unhappily, would you allow another guy such as an ex or a close friend to touch your sensitive areas. NO, I am not talking about breasts and vagina. I am talking about holding your hands, rubbing your thigh, shoulder, back, etc.


Hell no.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## browneyes74

No, although I will allow a back rub. Back rubs are okay, right? 

Seriously though, my back is a SERIOUS erogenous zone for me.. Aside from back rubs, that's just muscle, but lightly touch my back? yep, no, that's sexual for me.. 

I'm a touchy-feely person with a VERY select few.. my kids, my nephews, and (was) my husband.. everyone else thinks I'm pretty hands off, and I am.. 

I'll hug anyone, but that's about it.. but, no, I am not a toucher by nature other than those..


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## Holland

No but I do hug male friends.

I gave the ex a hug at his birthday lunch last year, it was a bit weird.


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## omgitselaine

Aside from quick pecks on the cheeks and hello hugs from my male friends or acquaintances i do not allow them to touch my back, neck , arms , breasts , ass or vajayjay ...... well you get the point 

_Posted via *Topify* on Android_


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## SaltInWound

Only for the sociable greeting such as a quick hug, but I have to know the guy really well for that to happen. Even then, I only use one hand and keep distance as I lean in. My stbxh wasn't intimate with me, so I found contact with other men uncomfortable.


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## FizzBomb

No. It would make me feel creepy. I'm only comfortable with those kinds of touches from my husband.


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## somethingelse

No. Rubbing and holding anything on my body would most definitely be going way too far.


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## I Notice The Details

Mrs. Details said "NO".


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## NewHubs

What a silly question to ask on this forum...:scratchhead:


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## Browneyedgurl020610

No that would cross boundaries for me and create issues. I don't mind a shoulder rub every now and then, but past that no, and ONLY if I knew the guy pretty well.


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## Anon Pink

Affectionate hugs are always good in my book. I like affection and I am a touchy person.

But don't try to press my chest against your chest so you can get some covert nipple action!


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## Daisy2714

Polite hugs are as far as I'm willing to go. Holding hands, touching thighs, back rubs.... no way! I'm a touchy person and I do give hugs to people I consider friends. It stops there.


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## arbitrator

*I know that I'm an older guy and God only knows that I certainly seem to "talk a good game," but with what male hormones that I have left that's still flowing, I really don't think that I would want any woman, other than one that I'm already romantically attached to, to touch me in such a way. And that's now inclusive of my skanky XW!

Now with that being said as a man, I would think that it's rather elementary as to what the response is universally going to be for any self-respecting woman!*


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## JJG

No!

That would be beyond uncomfortable and rude.


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## lonesomegra

To gender switch this question is interesting. I'm not sure if this is a cultural aspect or not but as a man on two occasions in the past 2 years 2 women have placed their hand firmly on my thigh. Once in the presence of my W and the other happened when a colleague was driving me to a function. Both times I was a little shocked but believe I was touched as a form of reassurance. I think some of us are unused to human contact and expression through touch is vital to keep some of us feeling human.


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## unbelievable

Most straight guys get through their days without putting their hands on other men and I seriously doubt the average man would feel the need to put his hands on any part of a woman he considered homely. So, when a straight guy puts his hands on any part of a woman unless it's required of his job or to save her life, he's doing so to feed some level of sexual gratification. He doesn't consider you "just a friend". He doesn't think of you as his "sister" unless you are, in fact, his sibling.


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## lonesomegra

Unbelieveable I've seen straight men slap other men's bums, hug, give high fives, bump chests, and touch each other's faces. And no this is not sexual. People are not so far gone that having fun is out the question. Some women do need to lighten up in this aspect. Not everything men do is sex, sex, sex.


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## ForBetter

No for me as well, except for the sort of quick hug that others have described, in greeting or sympathy. But I'm more likely to shake a hand than hug anyway.


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## alexm

unbelievable said:


> So, when a straight guy puts his hands on any part of a woman unless it's required of his job or to save her life, he's doing so to feed some level of sexual gratification. He doesn't consider you "just a friend". He doesn't think of you as his "sister" unless you are, in fact, his sibling.


Ah, you can't say that! There are some women here who will read that, and make the assumption that ANY time a man touches her in any way, it's because he wants to have sex with her. That is SO not the case. You have to read the situation before you make that assumption.

I am not at all a touchy-feely type of guy. I shake hands and that's about the extent of my greetings/goodbyes, if not just a simple wave, or a pat on the back (to men and women). When there's a hug involved, it's the other person who hugs me, 100% of the time. (except for my wife, of course)

But in a social setting, say dinner party at our house, there could be contact with people of either sex for me. A touch on the shoulder as I'm asking if somebody wants another drink, etc. A light back-handed touch on somebody's shoulder or knee during a conversation. That kind of thing.

If a guy (or girl) touches you in a way you're not expecting, and it FEELS wrong, then don't allow it to happen again. Make your boundaries clear, if not by body language, then by speaking out. But if somebody is more touchy than you are, it doesn't mean they want to nail you.


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## okeydokie

There is a small portion of the female population that is just waiting for some fool to touch them so they can file harassment charges. I used to work with one and I stayed as far away from her as possible, not that I would have ever touched her or any other woman I wasn't married to, it's inappropriate


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## melw74

Never


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## yeah_right

None of my straight male friends would dare touch me at all, except a brief hug during a holiday/wedding/funeral/birthday/etc. I'm all about boundaries.

My gay friends hug and kiss at will and are free to slap me on the butt.


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## convert

NewHubs said:


> What a silly question to ask on this forum...:scratchhead:


I was thinking the same.

So is a BJ out of the question?

I am sorry that was...not right

I never used to mind when my wife would hug or get a hug from another male "friend" but i do now, being a BS has that effect


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## Rags

Within certain contexts, it's inevitable.

These would include physical therapy, certain types of gymnastics, personal services such as massage or hairdressing/grooming, and some sports (e.g. full contact grappling.)

Otherwise, anything beyond a brief hug for _good_ friends would be for an ulterior purpose, I'm fairly sure.


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## helen84

Except the sociable greeting.
I don't think that guys rubbing married woman's thigh or shoulder is the right behavior.


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## DianeJiltz

uh oh. . 
No no no, that should be avoided. .


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