# Completely different opinion to wife on important things



## bob1471 (Dec 27, 2013)

One big thing is our neighbour. He is a complete **** theres no doubt about it but I just want to ignore him because I've got enough stress in my life without him adding to it.

BUT, not my mrs. Long story but fairly certain he keyed her car. Not 100%. But Mrs is all for doing it back - we disagree totally on this.

Yeh maybe I should do something to get back at this guy - he really is a ****. But I can just see things escalating and no-one winning. I look at the bigger picture and think yeh hes a ****, we can't prove it, let it go theres more to life etc. I've got a lot of stress at the mo and just dont need this.

Mrs lets her temper get away a bit and won't let it go though. It sort of takes over and shes got to win. Very strange to me - perhaps we're just too different person.

I've tried to talk sense and point out the consequences if he then escalates but she won't have it. Shes not letting him get away with it. Tried to explain that its causing me so much stress now but she says Im being unfair by trying to use that as an excuse.

Big argument between us. I've managed to convince her now to at least think before doing anything stupid and convinced her whatever she does will reflect on me also so she needs to talk to me.

I just dont understand her attitude though - let it go. Or maybe Im just too passive?


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## bob1471 (Dec 27, 2013)

tase said:


> Too passive. Slit his tires, smash his windows and scratch his paint. Kill his dog, and rape his wife.
> 
> Then come back for the next steps.


Im assuming this is not a serious post! 

Maybe I am too passive, but I see I key his he keys mind. Costs me money/hassle/stress.

I slash his tyres he does mind. Same again.

No winner here. MAybe getting my own back doesnt mean as much to me as some people. Bigger picture etc.


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## bob1471 (Dec 27, 2013)

tase said:


> True. Get a security camera and call it a day.
> 
> Taking the high road is never a cause for regret.


I can do its getting the wife to do it.


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## Spitfire (Jun 6, 2015)

My wife is a little bit like that but not quite that extreme. We live in a semi-country area. When our neighbors walked by our dogs would bark at them from our fenced yard about 30' from the road. The husband came over to see if we could prevent them from barking. My wife just went off on him. I came to see what was going on and ushered him off our property. My wife made it her mission to hassle him at every opportunity. They have a pool that they gravity drained every spring down a hill and onto the street in front of our house. She called the county and they made him pump it to a catch basin in front of his house. To me life's too short to get bent about everything.


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## EVG39 (Jun 4, 2015)

tase said:


> Too passive. Slit his tires, smash his windows and scratch his paint. Kill his dog, and rape his wife.
> 
> Then come back for the next steps.


You forgot mutilate his cattle. You always mutilate the cattle.:smile2:


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

You have no idea who keyed her car and probably don't know for sure where it was keyed or even if it was keyed. Your wife is urging you to punish this guy when she has jack dookie for evidence? This is why God puts two people together. One partner can be crazy as an out-house rat and the other is supposed to drag them back into the realm of reality. Set up security cameras. If appropriate, file an insurance claim or buff the scratches out. My wife is the over-the-top, shoot first, ask questions never type as well. I'm sure she finds me too passive and reasonable at times but neither of us are in jail. Those around me might be psycho but that sad fact places no burden on me to also be psycho. I have responsibilities to go to work, pay bills, etc. I can't be sitting in jail or in the psych ward over some stupidness. 

Slashing dude's tires or keying his car won't teach him a thing. It would be cowardly and childish. If someone lays a hand on me or my family, I'll happily blow their head off or whoop their a$$ but I'm not sneaking around committing vandalism like some ignorant 12 year old.


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## Shoto1984 (Apr 11, 2009)

My ex was like this. She was ready for drama daily and when it inevitably happened I was the one expected to jump in. (I digress) I like the security camera idea. Sell it to her that this way you'll have proof to use against him....that keying his car back it too good for the &*(&#(&$#!!!....you want is butt in jail...for 20 yrs....being someone's b*tch.... maybe she'll buy into your new found diabolical need for revenge. And you get a security camera out of it


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## OLDERMARRIEDCOUPLE (Mar 13, 2015)

Had a neighbor like this once.

No one knows where he moved.


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## zillard (Nov 13, 2012)

Not doing anything is too passive.
Putting yourself in legal trouble is too aggressive (in this case).

I'd file report (likely necessary for insurance anyway).
I'd put up cameras (and have) with or without wife's approval.
If she still rages, I'd tell her do what you want.
I've taken appropriate steps, so leave me out of your aggression and own your own behavior.
No bail if you get caught.


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## bob1471 (Dec 27, 2013)

unbelievable said:


> You have no idea who keyed her car and probably don't know for sure where it was keyed or even if it was keyed. Your wife is urging you to punish this guy when she has jack dookie for evidence? This is why God puts two people together. One partner can be crazy as an out-house rat and the other is supposed to drag them back into the realm of reality. Set up security cameras. If appropriate, file an insurance claim or buff the scratches out. My wife is the over-the-top, shoot first, ask questions never type as well. I'm sure she finds me too passive and reasonable at times but neither of us are in jail. Those around me might be psycho but that sad fact places no burden on me to also be psycho. I have responsibilities to go to work, pay bills, etc. I can't be sitting in jail or in the psych ward over some stupidness.
> 
> Slashing dude's tires or keying his car won't teach him a thing. It would be cowardly and childish. If someone lays a hand on me or my family, I'll happily blow their head off or whoop their a$$ but I'm not sneaking around committing vandalism like some ignorant 12 year old.


With you on this totally.... Got more important things to worry about.

But I like your perspective on things. I think Im a lot like you and your wife like mine lol. Its just coping with her being like that I find difficult.

Yeh of course like you I try to talk her out of her stupidity but doesnt always work. So what do you do then? Just live with the fact that shes not like you and she WILL do some stupid things. And just pray it doesnt have too many consequences.

BTW - it was definitely keyed and its not moved for 3 weeks from where it is so deffo been done where it is. 99% certain it was this fella but still....


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## bob1471 (Dec 27, 2013)

Shoto1984 said:


> My ex was like this. She was ready for drama daily and when it inevitably happened I was the one expected to jump in. (I digress) I like the security camera idea. Sell it to her that this way you'll have proof to use against him....that keying his car back it too good for the &*(&#(&$#!!!....you want is butt in jail...for 20 yrs....being someone's b*tch.... maybe she'll buy into your new found diabolical need for revenge. And you get a security camera out of it


Like you - drama I can do without....


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## bob1471 (Dec 27, 2013)

Lila said:


> @bob1471, did you report the vandalism to your wife's car to the police? If so, did you tell the cops your suspicions that it might have been the neighbor?
> 
> I agree with you that keying the neighbor's car is crazy, however, your response to the keying incident is way too passive. Immediately following the keying, you should have taken action to protect your property/family. by setting up security cameras and motion detector lights.


Yeh maybe I am too passive. Thanks for honesty - really... I think my wife might be the other way though - bat**** crazy!

Police no good. Things like this. They wont care or even come out for even if you point out who it was.

Previous incident with this neighbour. He parked one car 1" in front of ours and his other 1" behind so we couldnt move it. 

So rather than go around I called the police and asked if they could sent the community police around to ask him to quit it. Had to argue with them even to bother, they just said well go around yourself and sort it out, only when I pointed out it might cause a breach of the peace did they agree. 

Then 3 days later they still didnt bother - by the time they did neighbour had got bored and moved his cars. Then just said sorry looked ok to us.


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## bob1471 (Dec 27, 2013)

zillard said:


> Not doing anything is too passive.
> Putting yourself in legal trouble is too aggressive (in this case).
> 
> I'd file report (likely necessary for insurance anyway).
> ...


Answer to these.
File report for police. Pointless see other post. Insurance - not worth claiming anyway.
Cameras - trouble is its not near my house. Its weird I have a shared drive so this bit of public road is next to someone elses house so 20-30 yrds from my house to the side.
If she carries on - Yes I could tell her to carry on and do what she wants. But if it does escalate then potentially its going to affect me be it they cause further damage which I have to pay for, or worse (for instance we have cats). And we have kids - I cant leave her in jail lol because then I cant got to work - costs me money again.

Maybe Im a bit too passive though worrying what might happen?


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

bob1471 said:


> With you on this totally.... Got more important things to worry about.
> 
> But I like your perspective on things. I think Im a lot like you and your wife like mine lol. Its just coping with her being like that I find difficult.
> 
> ...


Unless you decide to live alone you will live with insanity. You just pick the sort of crazy you can live with. She can get loud and she can be annoying but so can my motorcycle and truck. None of them have the ability to make me do something ignorant. If you haven't met Jack Daniels, you might make his acquaintance. The Gentleman is a handy friend on occasion.


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## bob1471 (Dec 27, 2013)

Think main difference between us is if she feels someone has done something to wrong her then nothing else matters to her until she puts it right. Nothing at all.

Me maybe I go the other way. I just want a quiet life and will let maybe too much go. My thinking is I've got enough to worry about without getting involved with this.

If it escalated and it caused us to have to pay out for more damage like £500 then in my wifes eyes it'd be worth it to even things. In my eyes, its not worth the hassle, stress and cost.

She will retaliate and think thats it I've got him back. Luckily, she will leave it then. But she won't back down and will talk of escalating if they do. Just hope she never comes up against someone like her who wont back down either. Me - I think the worse and imagine how bad it might get if the other person escalates and how it will all end up.


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## bob1471 (Dec 27, 2013)

unbelievable said:


> Unless you decide to live alone you will live with insanity. You just pick the sort of crazy you can live with. She can get loud and she can be annoying but so can my motorcycle and truck. None of them have the ability to make me do something ignorant. If you haven't met Jack Daniels, you might make his acquaintance. The Gentleman is a handy friend on occasion.


Cheers UB. I like your outlook on life


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

The camera thing is a good idea. It does not matter where the drive way is. You can put remote cameras run with batteries that feed to your computer.

Then teach your wife more subtle ways to get back.

Get the videos of him harming your property and turn them into the police. If the police will not do anything, post it on Youtube. Then send links to all your other neighbors, all of his Facebook friends, etc.

Let him live in a fishbowl. 

A few years ago I had a neighbor who objected to our ponds (they were not that big). The ponds were stocked with koi and large fancy gold fish. Well this woman and her daughter (age 20) would come into our yard when we were not at home or sleeping and use the pumps so that the ponds drained. they did this very regularly She killed hundreds of dollars in fish. (neighbors can be crazy)

So I put a video camera in the second story window in my bedroom looking down on the ponds. Then I showed the neighbors the video. The old bag sold the house and she and her daughter moved.


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## FeministInPink (Sep 13, 2012)

@bob1471 & @EleGirl -- your two stories. This is why I hate people.

OP, I hope you can find a good way to deal with this sh!t. I, unfortunately, have no good suggestions. But I think the cameras are a good idea.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Easy solution:










Try it, if not, try the camera approach. If it gets worse let me know there are several options available. Sometimes you just have to show them who's boss, unafraid of the consequences - some costs you have to bear. It's part of life.

Btw - I happen to agree with your wife

Also if he parks and blocks your driveway just get it towed and he'll have to pay the cost for it too - that's the least annoyance really, more an opportunity to infuriate him!


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## zillard (Nov 13, 2012)

I had an old batty neighbor who thought she was Jesus. Seriously, she told the cops that's why she didn't wear shoes. She didn't like me exiting the shared easement next to her house instead of doing a 27 point turn around. 

She tried blocking the drive with branches, rocks (stolen from my yard), and even left neatly arranged lines of dog poop across the drive in the middle of the night. Had her relative set off M80s next to my window. 

Got it all on camera. Put it on YouTube.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## zillard (Nov 13, 2012)

Did you know it's super cheap to have someone dump a truckload of dirt/gravel in front of "your" car? 

Luckily didn't have to, but was prepared for it.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Hicks (Jan 14, 2011)

I would not become a criminal and would tell my wife that I am not going to commit crimes. IF she wants to you should strongly recommend against it. You need to be a little more persistent with the police though... Don't presuppose what they will do.. If you are persistent you will get action.


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## bob1471 (Dec 27, 2013)

Hicks said:


> I would not become a criminal and would tell my wife that I am not going to commit crimes. IF she wants to you should strongly recommend against it. You need to be a little more persistent with the police though... Don't presuppose what they will do.. If you are persistent you will get action.


Not sure where a lot of you guys are but Im in the UK. If the police aint interested here they aint interested which is a LOT of the time...


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Sounds like the cops in my city, they are always there to collect on traffic fines though

So what's your plan? A camera? A dog? 

A bazooka?

"Stop firing rockets at my house!"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NdXMFvTUWEY


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