# Is It Appropriate For A 9-Year Old To Have A Boyfriend?



## bogey (Feb 17, 2012)

my sister told me yesterday that her daughter--my niece--just had her 2 month anniversary with her boyfriend so they went out shopping together to celebrate. she just thought it was the cutest thing ever. but I don't know, its kind of upsetting to me. kids are moving really fast nowadays aren't they? 

is it really appropriate for a 9-year old girl to have a boyfriend? or am I just an old dinosaur?

I don't have any kids yet but I wouldn't want my daughter dating at that age..


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## southern wife (Jul 22, 2011)

Too young indeed. Kids do develop a "crush" at that age, but dating.......oh h#ll NO! :nono:


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## DayDream (May 25, 2011)

My son is 12 and started with the boyfriend girlfriend thing a couple years ago. Girls always seem to start earlier than boys do. 

I wouldn't worry about it. As long as your sister is monitoring them when they are together and not allowing them to spend a lot of alone time it should be fine. As long as it stays "cute" and doesn't get serious.


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## bbrad (May 30, 2012)

nope


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## Almostrecovered (Jul 14, 2011)

well I doubt it's the kind of relationship that teens have, it's most likely that they're just friends. But it does seem weird considering most 9 year old boys think girls are icky


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## DayDream (May 25, 2011)

southern wife said:


> Too young indeed. Kids do develop a "crush" at that age, but dating.......oh h#ll NO! :nono:


At that age, though, kids say they are boyfriend/girlfriend and it means something different than when they get older. I remember "getting married" on the playground when I was in sixth grade. It was all silly and innocent.


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## Almostrecovered (Jul 14, 2011)

I will recommend that they get tested for cooties regularly


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## DayDream (May 25, 2011)

Almostrecovered said:


> I will recommend that they get tested for cooties regularly


:rofl:


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## Stonewall (Jul 5, 2011)

depends on how you define that. I had gf when I was that age and that was 44 years ago.


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## DayDream (May 25, 2011)

My son had a "girlfriend" a couple years ago (that would put him at 10 & 1/2), she came over once or twice, he bored her to death with legos, she whined to us about him not paying enough attention to her (they start young...ha...), and that was the last I heard of them. They "broke up" one week later.


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## BeachGuy (Jul 6, 2011)

I agree it's probably a "kid thing" and maybe harmless, but letting two 9 year olds refer to each other as bf/gf and have "anniversaries" sets a precedence for future years. I have a 10 y/o and 13 y/o and neither has had a bf (nor will until I'm dead and buried).

I say it's not appropriate at that age and should be discouraged.


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## ScaredandUnsure (Nov 17, 2011)

My son had a girlfriend last year. It lasted 4 months, she came over here (no closed doors policy) which they would play video games. He'd go over to her house (same rules applied) and it was cute. He was 12 at the time. They broke up at almost 5 months in. I was amazed it lasted longer than some adult "relationships".

But I don't think I'd be okay with 9 and "dating". I still have a year or so until my other children get to that age, so we'll see.


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## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

2 month anniversary? wtf? 
not in my lifetime, but then mine is 16 and isn't bothered about boys yet
I don't think there's any harm in letting them be kids as long as possible to be honest, plenty of time to get into the relationship sh*tstorm


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## Mavash. (Jan 26, 2012)

My vote is HELL NO. 

I tell mine they are too young for boyfriends, to not grow up so fast and to enjoy their childhood. 

But I have friends who have let their kids grow up too fast and it's disturbing.


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## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

childhood bf/gf thing, no problem its pretty innocent. Now celebrating monthiversaries?? That sounds completely not age appropriate. This is grade 4 we're talking about here.


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## EnjoliWoman (Jul 2, 2012)

At that age my daughter had 'boyfriends' which meant they hung out together on the playground. That is sweet. But the parents actually taking them somewhere for a 'date' is rushing things.

My daughter is almost 14 and has her first 'boyfriend' who gives her hugs in school and talks via facetime every evening. But if she wanted to 'date' - I'm not sure I'm cool with that unless it's in a group setting. 

Right now I'll drop her at the movies/shopping center/mall to hang out, eat a meal, watch a movie with friends but not an actual date. So far no first kiss, either. I'm sure that's coming. I like this boy and he's a good first boyfriend. I've met him on several occasions at school. He sets the bar high.


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## sharkeey (Apr 27, 2012)

bogey said:


> is it really appropriate for a 9-year old girl to have a boyfriend? or am I just an old dinosaur?


That depends on how old the boyfriend is.

I took a girl out on a date once, she seemed a lot younger then her stated profile age. Before things progressed too far in the back of the car, I said to her, "be honest, how old are you?"

She held up the fingers of both hands and said "This many!"










I dropped her off at her house.


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## Emerald (Aug 2, 2012)

As a mother of daughters, I wouldn't call it a "boyfriend" & "dating."

It would be a boy who is a friend.


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## southern (Dec 6, 2012)

I agree with Emerald.


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