# I got served today.



## Iamthemuffinman (Oct 30, 2013)

So I got up early today to head out to campus and study in preparation for a big exam this morning. No sooner did I get out of bed than I was answering a ring at the door. I was served with notice of my wife’s filing a divorce petition.
For those of you who don’t know my story (or who didn’t/don’t want to read the 2k word play-by-play of our 7 year relationship - see "I am the muffin man" [in this sub-forum]) In short: 

She cheated on me from before our wedding, and never stopped. I caught her on the first guy who she had been with before our wedding and then had him move into our guest room, we worked it out (or so I thought) and I kicked him out but we spent the next 5 years with her lying to me about NO LESS than 5 additional affairs. When she gave me “full disclosure” about 2 months ago, after we bought our first home, I wanted to work things out. Counseling didn’t work, the experienced and well-regarded therapist judged her too obviously. In the end, my wife secretly got an apartment under her name (with all the utilities under her name) and moved out one day, to live with her *girlfriend*.

So I’m in a rigorous doctoral-level academic program, and I haven’t had the time to file my filled out petition. Things have kind of gone downhill lately, her family had to be told the truth (because they came after me when she lied to them about what was going on)
Well, I called her up a week or so ago and told her what I wanted: The house (and leave her the option of foreclosing on me if I fail to pay the mortgage) and the appliances in it (she already moved 90% of her stuff out.) I told her that if she contested this, and didn’t just make this all go away amicably, I would have to disclose everything to her employer (all 6 admitted affairs were with subordinates) so that they could help me build my case against her (and because they have a right to know). 
Texas is a no-fault state, but if contested, a judge can (and usually do) award disproportionate favor to a spouse who is victim to another spouse’s adultery. She met with an attorney for a free consultation and she was told exactly this.
Needless to say, things have only gotten nastier. She took my car off our auto-insurance policy, suspended my phone service, etc. We spoke a few days ago and agreed that our families were both in many ways at the helm of our decisions, and that nothing from here out is personal, yadda yadda, defense, yadda yadda. 

So she is filing without an attorney, seeking sole ownership of the house and claiming the refrigerator and washer/dryer as her personal property. (Fridge was purchased PARTLY using some funds gifted to both of us by her grandmother via a check to my stbxw, washer/dryer were purchased using her income, and are defined as community property per Texas law)
I have some evidence for court, pictures (some more implicit of an intimate relationship than others) a confession by one former lover over FB, the addition of her current lover’s vehicle to our auto-insurance policy, general pattern of behavior for which she’s been disciplined for at work (records are confidential) and may soon be terminated for, She confessed everything to me at one point, I walked in on her with the current lover, etc. 

I’m getting an attorney tonight after my big exam or tomorrow after class….

Anyone familiar with Texas divorce law enough to tell me if my evidence is sufficient or what if anything I can do at this juncture to protect my house/appliances?


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## Kerosene Hat (Nov 12, 2013)

Hey man I don't know TX law but hang in there. This is probably the worst thing you have had to deal with (I am going thru something similar), but it has to work out for the best. If the end is inevitable, look out for yourself. If the STBXW is past you, you need to find your way to get past her. And if you aren't ready, for damn sure get the bet representation you can so that they can (until you reach Pyrrhic Victory status; I do t recommend cutting your nose off to spite your face).

As Churchill said during the depths f the Blitz, "If you are going through Hell, for God's sake, KEEP GOING."

Best wishes to you in this horrible time from someone who knows.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ThreeStrikes (Aug 11, 2012)

Muffin,

Do us all a favor and keep these updates under your first post.

Good luck with the attorney!


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## smallsteps (Feb 23, 2013)

I'm not familiar with Texas law but all you need to do is stick it in a search engine and you'll find plenty.

If I were you though, contact a lawyer asap. Don't put it off.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*I'm somewhat familiar with the Texas Family Code from sheer personal experience.

No. 1 : I take it that you didn't sign off on a prenup(prenuptial agreement) of any kind. If not, you can recover all that you personally brought into the marriage, but anything else that was procured during that period falls under community property laws ~ greatly meaning an equitable split of those assets by the Court.

So what county are you in if you don't mind me asking?*


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## 6301 (May 11, 2013)

If I were you I would load up the washer, dryer, and fridge in a truck and drop it off in her front yard or parking lot. Out of sight, out of mind. She wanted them, she got them. No one says that you have to bring them in her house. That's why she has two arms and a back.


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