# Snoring driving me crazy!!!



## Oldfaithful (Nov 27, 2013)

In the last two months my husbands snoring has gotten so bad that no matter what position he is in it's very loud. Nothing has changed other than the weather. 
We are usually sleeping apart. I hate it. 
My question is if I come home and have a few hours to myself by some miracle of god, and I am taking a nap, isn't it really rude for him to come and sleep next to me? That would be like me coming in and turning on an alarm next to him while he's taking a nap. 
I just don't get it. And I hardly ever get to nap, and I'm recovering from a sinus infection. I hate this. 
I love him so much but it think it's rude. I even asked if he was going to snore on me and he said "probably". He is usually very thoughtful. I don't get it. 

If anyone can recommend ear plugs or snore solutions that work I would be grateful. Regular ear plugs do nothing for me.


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## KathyBatesel (Apr 26, 2012)

He can't help snoring. You're looking at this as rudeness rather than a desire to be close to you. This is one of those things where I think, "You can be right, or you can be happy." 

Cherish this guy who wants to stay close to you. Isn't that more important than a nap? I mean, if you're chronically sleep deprived, I'd be more sympathetic perhaps, but it sounds like you're sleeping apart and you just sound like you want a nap, not that your lack of sleep is interfering with your job performance or something. 

Ask him to visit a doc for a sleep eval, too. He may have sleep apnea.


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## Disenchanted (Sep 12, 2012)

Does he have low t?


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## OnTheRocks (Sep 26, 2011)

I had/have severe snoring / borderline apnea. I've been using a CPAP for about 16 yrs now, and it literally changed my life. I can't say it saved my marriage (LOL), but every woman I've shared a bed with appreciates it very much, once they get past the whole "a young, fit guy sleeping with serious-looking medical equipment?" thing. I literally used to fall asleep at my desk and in meetings due to poor sleep. I tried several other solutions, and nothing worked. Don't fall for the gimmicky mouthpieces & jaw straps. They can do surgery to cut away the soft palate, but it has a lot of risks, like not being able to swallow without getting stuff in your nose.


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## Aspydad (Oct 17, 2013)

Sounds like he needs to get a sleep study done to see if he has sleep apnea. It actually runs in my family - both my father and brother were diagnosed with it and now both use sleep machines which eliminate the snoring. I am on the edge - when my weight is up a little, my snoring gets worse - when I keep it down, I am ok and wife can put up with me. I do not want to have to use one of those machines so I do keep fit and watch what I eat - this is my incentive.


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## JustSomeGuyWho (Dec 16, 2012)

Well ... I guess I would give him the benefit of the doubt on this one. He's sleeping ... he has no perception of just how annoying or bothersome it is.

I've snored since I was a child. Now I'm 46 and I've recently been diagnosed with mild sleep apnea ... which was a surprise because "according to reports", it's a lot worse than mild. The primary suspect is my tonsils ... they are enormous. Despite the difficulties people seem to have at my age, my doctor is recommending getting my tonsils removed. It's either that or a machine and personally I would prefer to fix the problem for good.

You say this happened in the last couple of months. Has he seen a doctor for any changes in his throat?


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## Aspydad (Oct 17, 2013)

KathyBatesel said:


> He can't help snoring. You're looking at this as rudeness rather than a desire to be close to you. .


I tell my wife that my snoring should be music to her ears - she just doesn't quite see it that way. 

About once a month I have a bad night and she leaves me and sleeps in the spare room -I will say that I do not like that at all - feels like we are roommates and not husband and wife when she does that.


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## JustSomeGuyWho (Dec 16, 2012)

Disenchanted said:


> Does he have low t?


That is a good question ... I've not yet experienced it but lack of good sleep does contribute to low t and consistently getting a good night sleep is one of the 'natural' low t remedies. Getting 8 hours doesn't matter if he has sleep apnea.


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## OnTheRocks (Sep 26, 2011)

The machine isn't that bad once you get used to it. I don't like to have to pack it around with me when I travel or shack up with my gf, but it's way better than not sleeping well. 

People snore for many different reasons. Mine isn't my weight or my tonsils. I'm 40, float around 10% body fat, and had my tonsils out when I was a kid. My soft palate just relaxes when I fall asleep, and causes loud snoring. If I don't use my CPAP one night, I usually wake up tired and have a sore throat from snoring.


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## Cosmos (May 4, 2012)

I don't think him wanting to be close to you is rude, but I do think that your H's snoring needs tackling quite urgently. Your H needs to seek medical advice for his snoring, and in the meanwhile you could do with going to your pharmacy and discussing a pair of good earplugs.

Both my SO and I snore. We don't live together, but when he first used to sleep over his snoring drove me as batty as mine probably did him. We used to gently wake one another up when it got bad and change position but, strangely enough, we have somehow managed to stop snoring so much when we sleep together!


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## notperfectanymore (Mar 1, 2012)

Do you use the heavy foam earplugs? I feel your pain. My husband snores pretty bad BUT I am a heavy sleeper. As long as I have my ear plugs and fall asleep first, he can pretty much drop a bomb and I'm good. 

Sounds like he isn't realizing how loud he is...can you similate for him to get him to understand? I feel your pain, it drives me nuts and I would never get any sleep without my earplugs.


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## Cletus (Apr 27, 2012)

Getting the snoring fixed aside, the solution I've adopted with my wife is simple. We start the night in the same room. If the snoring drives me out, so be it. By the time I have to leave, it doesn't really matter. At least we started out together. 

I have a permanent bed in my pouting room that I use for snoring relief, probably one out of every two nights on average.


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## JustSomeGuyWho (Dec 16, 2012)

The thing I question is that the change in his snoring happened quickly and recently. Not that there is anything serious but a doctor visit needs to happen.

_Posted via *Topify* on Android_


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## JustSomeGuyWho (Dec 16, 2012)

Cletus said:


> Getting the snoring fixed aside, the solution I've adopted with my wife is simple. We start the night in the same room. If the snoring drives me out, so be it. By the time I have to leave, it doesn't really matter. At least we started out together.
> 
> I have a permanent bed in my pouting room that I use for snoring relief, probably one out of every two nights on average.


You have a room for pouting? 

_Posted via *Topify* on Android_


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## melw74 (Dec 12, 2013)

I do not think there is anything worse when your trying to get to sleep, and your husband is snoring..... LOUDLY.

My husband has to get up at 3 in the morning so he usually goes up quite early, and as i walk in the room it sound as if there is a tornado going off in there, usually because hes so knackered, and does not get a great amount of sleep.

Also when hes had a few drinks, and i always know hes gonna snore.

If your hes doing it every night, and your losing loads of sleep over it, then its bound to make you ratty.

We have not found a solution. I am living with it..... I try to make sure i am really knackered when i go up so i fall straight asleep, and do not have to suffer it.

What about an elbow in the ribs


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## Cletus (Apr 27, 2012)

JustSomeGuyWho said:


> You have a room for pouting?
> 
> _Posted via *Topify* on Android_


Of course. It's a name I picked up from a work buddy long, long ago for where you put the bed that you sleep in when you aren't in with the wife, for whatever reason.


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## Oldfaithful (Nov 27, 2013)

Well I'm sleep deprived because I'm sleeping with a snorer! I barely got any sleep last night and had to sleep on the couch. Then of course when he got up it woke me up again. 
And I'm on day three of antibiotics for a bad sinus infection so it's not like "oh I slept for nine hours I think I'll take a nap." 

His testosterone was 750 last time he got tested a few weeks ago. 
He fell asleep at work at his desk today and a coworker said he was snoring. 

His mom is a horrible snorer but refuses to do anything about it. His parents almost always sleep in separate rooms. 

I told him he needs a sleep study and he said he will look into it. 

I have always been a super light sleeper and it got worse after becoming a mom. The other thing is if I have ear plugs in I won't be able to be on mom duty which is scary. 

Thanks everyone. I just don't get why after I slept on the couch he wouldn't let me nap. And I have recorded it and played it for him.


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## newlywed_wife (Feb 1, 2014)

My husband snores LOUDLY as well. If he ever sleeps before I do, I can never go to bed and end up sleeping downstairs. Ever since I realized how badly he snores, I'm overly sensitive whenever i hear him start up.

He always brushed it off thinking it's no big deal. I recorded him sleeping a couple times just to show him how bad it was. 

There are plastic nose strips out there to help the snoring. I forget the price but i believe something along the lines of 20 for $6. They don't completely rid the snoring, there's still a hovering sound but it's better than a tornado. I get him to put it on and I always try to sleep first. So far it's going well only had to sleep separately once this year.

Goodluck!


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## Cletus (Apr 27, 2012)

The one thing you can do to help is to get him off his back. Everyone snores worse on their back when the soft palette collapses at the back of the throat. Poke him and make him roll over. I've successfully trained my wife on this one.


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## Oldfaithful (Nov 27, 2013)

Cletus said:


> The one thing you can do to help is to get him off his back. Everyone snores worse on their back when the soft palette collapses at the back of the throat. Poke him and make him roll over. I've successfully trained my wife on this one.


That used to help but now it doesn't. It doesn't matter what position he sleeps in. And it doesn't matter if I get to sleep first. If there's a buzz saw going off in the room I'm going to wake up.


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## Disenchanted (Sep 12, 2012)

Take melatonin and make him rock you to sleep.


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## Oldfaithful (Nov 27, 2013)

I think he needs melatonin. I think he's stressing about a lot if health stuff. We talked last night and he's really scared about a surgery I'm having.


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## Oldfaithful (Nov 27, 2013)

Last night he took Benadryl and Flonase and he didn't snore at all!!!! Hallelujah


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## KathyBatesel (Apr 26, 2012)

We gave patients in the psych ward Benadryl as a matter of routine because it helped them sleep better. 

The nasal strips can help, too, but if he's as severe as it sounds, maybe not. Glad you got some rest, though!


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## Microwavelove (Sep 11, 2013)

I have a husband that snores like a chainsaw. I don't think he is being intentionally rude because I think the issue with people who snore is that they can't hear themselves doing it and don't know how loud and disruptive it is. Hopefully the Benadryl will continue to work and in the meantime maybe he can get some help with it from the Dr. Good luck! I feel your pain.


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## Oldfaithful (Nov 27, 2013)

Microwavelove said:


> I have a husband that snores like a chainsaw. I don't think he is being intentionally rude because I think the issue with people who snore is that they can't hear themselves doing it and don't know how loud and disruptive it is. Hopefully the Benadryl will continue to work and in the meantime maybe he can get some help with it from the Dr. Good luck! I feel your pain.


Thanks. I think we know partially why it's happening, he is having tingling in his jaw and ended up having an MRI. Dr said there is narrowing of the openings off the vertebrae that have to do with breathing.


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## melw74 (Dec 12, 2013)

newlywed_wife said:


> My husband snores LOUDLY as well. If he ever sleeps before I do, I can never go to bed and end up sleeping downstairs. Ever since I realized how badly he snores, I'm overly sensitive whenever i hear him start up.
> 
> He always brushed it off thinking it's no big deal. I recorded him sleeping a couple times just to show him how bad it was.
> 
> ...


My daughter recorded her dad snoring, he was none to happy when she told him she was going to show her friends.

We were both sitting downstairs watching t.v, and believe it or not it was quite loud. ( the t.v not my husband ). When i heard a growling noise from upstairs, turned down the remote and plain as day we both could hear him and i mean loudly.

My daughter rushed upstairs and recorded him. We now put it on if were feeling devious and want a good laugh.


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