# 12 years of marriage in limbo



## abe0509 (May 21, 2018)

First thing is my wife and i have always been what i would consider best friends and a team. She has suffered with depression for our entire relationship because of her family. We made a plan when we were younger that we would have children and raise them together they way we wanted to. We struggled for years and lost a lot of them before we finally had our first(3 years ago). We didn't know it at the time but she was allergic to so many things. This caused her to cry constantly and also only sleep less than an hour at a time. It was hard. We struggled for a couple years and ended up getting pregnant again without warning thinking it wasn't possible. This baby was even harder... We both ended up distancing ourselves from each other over time. We both hoped once they could be watched by someone we could finally be together properly again. This happened and we finally got days to go out together and spend time (a couple months). We still had not gotten back to our normal intimacy but were working on it. She met a new friend(girl) and seemed to be getting back to being happy. A month or so ago i notice she stopped kissing me goodnight or any kind of attention at all. I asked her every day what was wrong and she always said nothing. I finally reached a breaking point and decided to figure out for myself. I found she had been talking to guys online sexually sending nudes and such(i've been an IT server administrator for 11 years and captured all of her phone data and read through it) When i confronted her she was completely emotionless and said she wanted a divorce. I left for a few days. i called her and she asked to talk and we reconciled for two days. It was like when we first met and everything was great. She then installed her chat apps back onto her phone and stayed on them constantly up until our first therapy session. Everything seemed to be fine from the session like there was a path and we had a possibility to work things out. The next day she gets drunk and start yelling at me that she is so mad that i ignored her for so long. She says a part of her still loves me but she is completely numb. She ended up asking for a few days away and is currently at her friends while i take care of our daughters. She is supposed to come to the therapy session on Thursday but i'm struggling so hard just to keep myself together much less take care of kids... My question is should i wait till Thursday for this or begin to move on...


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