# Self conscious wife



## Waited4This

So my wife is very self conscious about her body. We have been married for 8yrs, no kids, good communication, very little fighting (almost none). I always tell her how sexy she is to me but the response is always negetive, this affects our sex life also to where she basically lays there waiting for it to be over, never enthuiastic about it at all. She has recently been watching what she eats and lost 6lbs in 3 weeks so when she told me I show my excitment for her and how happy I was for her ( I never asked her to lose weight this is all her). Ladies what more can I do to make her feel sexy and cease this moment while she is happy with herself. I have tried to get her to buy sexy clothes but she never buys any and gives up, should I just go and buy something I like and ask her to wear it for me?


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## CallaLily

I do think you should continue to be positive and show encourgement towards her. However, the way she feels about herself will need to change from within. No one can make her like/love herself or feel better about how she looks. She will need to do that.


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## OliveAdventure

Personally I wouldn't want my finace to buy something for me and say please wear this. If he gave me money and said, you are gorgeous and I want you to treat yourself to some nice lingerie, I would be like heeellllll yes!!!!

I have low self esteem sometimes and he tells me everyday how beautiful I am.. More so now that I'm pregnant.. It's stuff like this that helps, but the end result is she needs to believeit herself and the only one that can work on that is her


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## CompatibilityandLove

Your wife needs to feel comfortable with who she is and comfortable in her own skin. 

If she is happy the ways she is, and you married her because of that, then I think you should buy the male sexy stuff and wear it yourself. 

That way you can feel what it is like to be outside your comfort zone and see change from your wife's point of view.

Id suggest you be grateful you have a loving wife and a good relationship.

Cheers

Rosemary


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## Hurra

CompatibilityandLove said:


> Your wife needs to feel comfortable with who she is and comfortable in her own skin.
> 
> If she is happy the ways she is, and you married her because of that, then I think you should buy the male sexy stuff and wear it yourself.
> 
> That way you can feel what it is like to be outside your comfort zone and see change from your wife's point of view.
> 
> Id suggest you be grateful you have a loving wife and a good relationship.
> 
> Cheers
> 
> Rosemary


I disagree with the last sentence. My wife is the same way. Prior marriage she was making an effort to get over her issues with her physical self, not that she has any. I and many others tell her how gorgeous she is. After marriage, she gave up and it affects our sex lives. My wife dresses really classy and has a figure that turns heads. Just watching her around the house turns me on but nothing I can do about it. She won't allow herself to be bad but sticks to the same routine, sex at night before sleep, lights off and missionary. I am so bored with that I don't go looking for it. 

I doubt the OP settled for his wife so he shouldn't have to be grateful for what he has despite what is missing but he can clarify hopefully.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## heartsbeating

Kiss her all over, take your time, admire every inch of her, preferably by candle light; tell her how beautiful she is. Appreciate her. Mean it.

But .....there isn't a whole lot you can do to help except let her know how gorgeous she is and help her to feel comfortable with you naked. Maybe that means you need to back up and slow it down to awaken her sensuality, without sex being the end result. And don't accept her negative responses when you compliment her. Other than that, it really does need to come from within. 

I have friends who have amazing bodies, tall, trim, seriously gorgeous looking women and yet, I still hear them complain about their bodies or they're on some never-ending shake diet. Another friend who knows she's on the larger side but works-out a lot and is very fit cardio-wise, is much more confident in her body than some of our other friends. It's about self acceptance and self worth. It's not about size or otherwise.

Ultimately, it's got to come from within her.


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## Chelle D

If she is selfconscious about her body... I would not bring up the weight loss


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