# God help me... RANT



## applesapples (Jun 3, 2014)

I don't know what to do. My husband is so incredibly dumb that there's nothing he can do that doesn't frustrate me for his sheer stupidity. I have no confidence in him, no respect for him, and he can't even be considered my friend. We live in the same house and we share a child and we manage to co-exist, but we are neither lovers or even companions - we have nothing in common and struggle to even hold a conversation, unless I'm just telling him about something in my day. We were married in 2002 and we have been intimate only twice since my son was born in 2003, and not much more before his birth. I can't bring myself to have another child with him, and it tears me apart that my son is so lonely. He's so stupid he can't even understand what I'm talking about, he can't understand how I think in ANY way. I'm just so angry with him all the time because I can't rely on him. He can't do anything that makes sense, he wastes so much time and refuses to wear a watch, he can't think ahead, he can't think of the big picture, he's going on for 50 and yet he lives and acts as though he's in his twenties, no assets, no aspirations, and no concept that it's a problem. I'm thirteen years younger and I'm the only one who's thinking about the future. He's such a kind person and very selfless, and it was only for these reasons that I married him, but the difference in intellectual ability is just unbearable now... I don't want to be married to him anymore. All I find myself saying to him at the moment is "Idiot" "Moron". I'm turning into such a bad person, worse and worse each day. I'm just so so so angry. Aaarghhh.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

So now that you've vented... What are you going to do to make sure this year ends better than last year?

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Thundarr (Jul 4, 2012)

apples, no offense but you've been married to him for 12 years. Does that not make you angry at yourself? Why are you stuck in this?


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## Counterfit (Feb 2, 2014)

applesapples said:


> ...... He's such a kind person and very selfless, and it was only for these reasons that I married him.........


You have got to be kidding........you entered into a marriage because you met a man who is "kind and selfless"..........I know many woman who are both kind and selfless.......that does not make me want marry them.

I think you are holding back from the forum,,,,,,why did you really marry this man?


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

You say that he has no assets.

Do you work outside the home? Do you have assets?


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## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

If he was really dumb as a sack of hair, and as worthless as you say, why on earth did you marry him? Why have a child with him? Why stay with him for 12 years?

This level of frustration and vitriol for a spouse is sometimes the product of the rationalization hamster churning in a person's mind. Is there another guy, a male friend or coworker perhaps, in your life that you're comparing him to that leads you to finding your husband so lacking?


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## Hicks (Jan 14, 2011)

Yeah, seems like you made a poor choice in a father to your children. Do you have any responsiblity here?


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## highwood (Jan 12, 2012)

She knew what he was like prior to marrying him...I doubt he was highly ambitious prior to marriage and then all of a sudden changed.

Is he a good father?


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

applesapples said:


> I don't want to be married to him anymore.


So get a divorce.


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## SamuraiJack (May 30, 2014)

I have a feeling we arent getting the whole story here.

Perhaps the OP could explain a little more. Right now she comes off as "Blameless"....but we know it always takes two to destroy a marriage.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

SamuraiJack said:


> I have a feeling we arent getting the whole story here.
> 
> Perhaps the OP could explain a little more. Right now she comes off as "Blameless"....but we know it always takes two to destroy a marriage.


Actually, no... It DOESN'T always take two people to destroy a marriage. But I do agree that it's often not as one-sided as originally portrayed. 

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ScrambledEggs (Jan 14, 2014)

applesapples said:


> I don't know what to do. My husband is so incredibly dumb that there's nothing he can do that doesn't frustrate me for his sheer stupidity. I have no confidence in him, no respect for him, and he can't even be considered my friend. We live in the same house and we share a child and we manage to co-exist, but we are neither lovers or even companions - we have nothing in common and struggle to even hold a conversation, unless I'm just telling him about something in my day. We were married in 2002 and we have been intimate only twice since my son was born in 2003, and not much more before his birth. I can't bring myself to have another child with him, and it tears me apart that my son is so lonely. He's so stupid he can't even understand what I'm talking about, he can't understand how I think in ANY way. I'm just so angry with him all the time because I can't rely on him. He can't do anything that makes sense, he wastes so much time and refuses to wear a watch, he can't think ahead, he can't think of the big picture, he's going on for 50 and yet he lives and acts as though he's in his twenties, no assets, no aspirations, and no concept that it's a problem. I'm thirteen years younger and I'm the only one who's thinking about the future. He's such a kind person and very selfless, and it was only for these reasons that I married him, but the difference in intellectual ability is just unbearable now... I don't want to be married to him anymore. All I find myself saying to him at the moment is "Idiot" "Moron". I'm turning into such a bad person, worse and worse each day. I'm just so so so angry. Aaarghhh.



You are wrong on most accounts.

He is not kind and selfless because he won't sacrifice his time or energy to provide or benefit his families future or make an effort to carry on any form of intimacy with you.

He is not stupid because he has found someone that tolerates and even supports him while he skates through life with little pressure or responsibility. He just does not want to spoil a good thing.

I think you should try counseling but then get out if he does not grown up. You have a lot of good years ahead.


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