# Post something positive about your marriage



## Plan 9 from OS

Let's shift gears here. I'm tired of reading all the negative threads out there. I post on the ones where I feel I can help out, but it can be a drain. So let's post about what we love about our spouse and marriage.

I love the fact that my wife and I can talk about anything. Whenever an issue comes up that bothers us - whether it's something one of us did, work related, friend related, etc - we're talking about it. I think we squash a lot of bigger problems when we talk things out early on. Also, I like knowing that my wife wants to talk to me and seek comfort/advice about other problems affecting her.


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## Convection

Good idea, this thread.

My wife and I laugh together nonstop. We joke and pick on each other all the time and are always playful in our interactions. In some ways, we never left that dating phase where you make up pet names, where one partner pretends to pout so the other one can kiss them out of it, where our running jokes cause us to break into hysterics while simultaneously baffling our friends, where we still have tickle fights. 

Laughter is powerful medicine. Neither of us can get enough and both of us love to make the other laugh and smile.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## A Bit Much

I think I have a really long list of positives, but one that sticks out for me is that we have fun and LAUGH together all the time.

We can make a trip to the grocery store funny as hell. His sense of humor is a bit sillier than mine which can lean on the smart-ass side, but we balance each other out very well. We have a ton of inside jokes and we like to toss out funny movie lines to each other all the time. God that man is fun.


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## Plan 9 from OS

My wife and I will regularly joke around a lot too. We've been going out on date nights once a week. We don't really go out to anywhere special, but we try to regularly go out weekly just the two of us. We joke around that our Friday or Saturday date night will be "Dinner and Sam's Club", or Dinner and Target, etc... I love that about my wife and marriage. We enjoy the time spent together away from the kids a lot more than the destinations themselves. So long as we can be together to talk and laugh together, it's all we need for our date nights.


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## A Bit Much

People probably think it's not a good thing (obviously not me) but we're one another's best friend. There's not one thing he doesn't know about me. And I feel safe telling him things because he's a great secret keeper. I am too, so he's shared things with me he never would with anyone else.


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## A Bit Much

Plan 9 from OS said:


> My wife and I will regularly joke around a lot too. We've been going out on date nights once a week. We don't really go out to anywhere special, but we try to regularly go out weekly just the two of us. We joke around that our Friday or Saturday date night will be "Dinner and Sam's Club", or Dinner and Target, etc... I love that about my wife and marriage. We enjoy the time spent together away from the kids a lot more than the destinations themselves. So long as we can be together to talk and laugh together, it's all we need for our date nights.


This is great! And also very necessary. Dating in your marriage should never stop. Putting each other first should never stop either. You put her first to get her, you have to keep doing that.


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## Plan 9 from OS

A Bit Much said:


> People probably think it's not a good thing (obviously not me) but we're one another's best friend. There's not one thing he doesn't know about me. And I feel safe telling him things because he's a great secret keeper. I am too, so he's shared things with me he never would with anyone else.


IMHO, your spouse SHOULD be your best friend. Considering the goal is to be together for a lifetime, you should spend it with your best friend and lover. That's how I see it.


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## LovesHerMan

We share a marvelous sense of adventure. My husband's job as a commercial pilot has allowed us to travel around the world, experiencing different cultures, scenery, foods, and customs. He is a bit of a pirate, and I love that we have so many wonderful memories of the places that we have visited.

He has also helped me overcome many of my faults, such as holding grudges, pouting, and worrying too much about what others think of me.


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## CharlieParker

I wrote this in Social earlier today. _I started to think about writing up "something positive". Don't like writing so I just started with how we got together. I don't know why but it kind of surprised me, the things that brought us together are still important (and happening), including that we just like talking and hanging with each other. Go figure._

Also gotta have a laughter.

Along with, or related to, being best friends we're a great team. We met at work and even before dating she made a nurse/surgeon analogy. We cook together most evenings, really good for us, quality time and we get to talk, laugh and heck somebody's always coping a feel. Just realized to along with loving food, our joint weight loss efforts are brining/keeping us nicely together.


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## anja

I love that he is becoming a godly man and true leader of our family right before my eyes. Love his sense of humor and that we have the same goals in life. Love that he can laugh about himself. Supports my crazy. How he loves on our kids. How we can't keep our hands off each other. We are the king and queen of PDA and love it. How he is strong when I am not. That he is forever looking into how to better our marriage. His love for music. The way we constantly rip insider jokes. That he has opened up to me like he had never before. That he willingly eats what I try to cook. That he is clean and takes pride in personal hygiene. That he is a non-smoker and doesn't drink coffee. The way only he can kiss!! There are 1000 more things I love about him. 
There is truly nobody that I'd rather spend my time with, even when we disagree on things. 
I love that he's not perfect nor doesn't think himself to be.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Coffee Amore

I love that my husband and I work out together at the same gym. We do it while we wait for one of our kids to finish an extracurricular activity nearby. The time goes by so fast when we're exercising together. On the days we can't work out for whatever reason, we both feel very disappointed. It's become a routine for us to work out together a several evenings a week. He pushes me to do things at the gym I would have avoided had I gone by myself. I pretend to spot him when he lifts heavy weights though I hope I never have to actually lift one of those weights off him. We even have a silly slogan we use at the start of each workout. It's an inside joke that no one else would get but us. I love that I can be totally makeup free, sweaty with messy hair and he still thinks I'm beautiful and hot.


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## Ikaika

18+ years of marriage and we never stop communicating with each. No topic is off-limits. Needless to say we have had rough patches but we never ever looked at it any other way but to work on it. It was always about each of us taking personal responsibility in our short comings while also being patient with each other. 

And, yes we still laugh together and enjoy each other's company. And, lets not forget even after all this time intimacy is still an important part of this relationship. I am not one to tell all, but let us just say we still know how to push each others buttons (sexually ). I believe learning the other person makes sex in long-term relationships better not boring as some might think. 

Finally, I think it is important that each of us have made a personal commitment to take care of our health. A bit of hedonism but more importantly it is about being selfless so as to delay that "in sickness..." part of our vows. We know at some point one will likely have to care for the other, but the longer we can put that off the better for both of us.


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## SMLC_Xo

My husband is mellow, passive, creative, a deep thinker...

I am aggressive, a go getter, practical, logical...

And together we make the PERFECT human being LOL I believe marrying him was the best decision Ive ever made!


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## Plan 9 from OS

SMLC_Xo said:


> My husband is mellow, passive, creative, a deep thinker...
> 
> I am aggressive, a go getter, practical, logical...
> 
> And together we make the PERFECT human being LOL I believe marrying him was the best decision Ive ever made!


My wife is a planner, an organizer and she is great at keeping us on task at home. But she is terrible under pressure. I'm more disorganized and I don't plan as much for our events. But when the chips are down and we need a quick solution to get out of a situation, then I can come up with some pretty creative fixes. I'm great under pressure but get bored with routine. My wife thrives by setting up our routine but cracks under pressure. Just one example of how we bring different strengths to the marriage to create something special.


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## LovesHerMan

A few years ago I had to settle my bachelor uncle's estate. My husband supported me completely, from fronting money for the funeral to driving me from Newark airport to Passaic (a very scary thing for this Midwestern gal). 

He never once complained that maybe my eccentric uncle was part of my crazy family, or that I would never sort out New Jersey estate tax laws. We have always been there for each other, and it has made our marriage much stronger to weather the difficulties together.


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## Ikaika

LovesHerMan said:


> A few years ago I had to settle my bachelor uncle's estate. My husband supported me completely, from fronting money for the funeral to driving me from Newark airport to Passaic (a very scary thing for this Midwestern gal).
> 
> He never once complained that maybe my eccentric uncle was part of my crazy family, or that I would never sort out New Jersey estate tax laws. We have always been there for each other, and it has made our marriage much stronger to weather the difficulties together.


Anytime a family member is dying this can easily put a strain on a relationship. We have survived FIL, My parents and sister... through it all we supported each other. Treated in-laws as if they were our own blood family. 

On that note, I really have to give credit to my wife's family (extend family) that helps in so many small ways. This adds up in helping our marriage and not hurting it at all. It take a village to keep a marriage strong.


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## CharlieParker

Newark airport to Passaic is scary no matter what. 

Driving segway - we compromise well and usually easily reach a consensus. She learned to drive at 30 because we compromised where we would live after we got married. She still isn't a fan of driving but when moved further out she knew she would have drive more. And she does but sometimes needs my help, I'll show her how to get somewhere by actually driving her there.


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## A Bit Much

Speaking of families, ours all gets along with one another. He has a larger family than I do and I love them. They're quite a bunch. It's unusual though, not too many of them are in long term marriages, especially in our age group. Nevertheless, when we all get together, my head swims from laughing and catching up. They have family meetings and even a board of directors to head up family stuff. Last year, the elder members stepped down, and that left my H and his cousins to the task. I was nominated and voted in as the family secretary. They must really like me.


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## Advocado

He's steady and reliable, a constant for the kids and grandchild. His heart is in the right place, even if he doesn't get things right all the time (well who does). 

He's hardworking and industrious. He doesn't winge about his health issues.

Oh, and somehow he's managed to put up with me all these years and I can't stop loving him (even when I've tried). 

And last but not least, he's the BEST kisser in all the world. The phrase, sweeter than wine cames to mind. His kisses can truly take me into another world.


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## treyvion

Plan 9 from OS said:


> Let's shift gears here. I'm tired of reading all the negative threads out there. I post on the ones where I feel I can help out, but it can be a drain. So let's post about what we love about our spouse and marriage.
> 
> I love the fact that my wife and I can talk about anything. Whenever an issue comes up that bothers us - whether it's something one of us did, work related, friend related, etc - we're talking about it. I think we squash a lot of bigger problems when we talk things out early on. Also, I like knowing that my wife wants to talk to me and seek comfort/advice about other problems affecting her.


The positive out of the negative was actually having methods to respond properly to such a negative situation. Before this you feel powerless and alone.

When I first came to TAM the advantage of it over the other sites, was a positive attitude, contructive attitude of handling this tramatic experience. On the other blogs, theres more hopelessness and people get beat down to some really low levels.

Positive about my new situation? Well, we communicate very well and have been building up our bedroom, piece by tiny piece.


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## A Bit Much

I used to believe that marriage was hard. With my H it's never been hard though. He's a kind and very thoughtful person by nature, and he loves me wholeheartedly. It shows in everything he does, not just what he says. He's the most consistent person I know, and for a person like me who finds it hard to trust, he has managed to win me over again and again with his actions. He's a spiritual person and he's quite mature and wise even though I'm 3 years older than he is. I love that he has an innocence about him that I don't have.

We do things every day for one another that show we care. It can be a phone call or a back rub or a note, but it's something. We understand that life is way too short to hold grudges and resentments for mistakes we make. In almost 11 years I can count 2 fights (if you even want to call it that) we've had, and we didn't let 12 hours go by without resolving whatever it was. He has a willingness to get along and compromise, just like me. You would think with SO many things in common we would get on each others nerves, but it hasn't happened yet. We're even more passionate about one another now than we were 11 years ago.


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## CharlieParker

Another thread reminded me of this, we share a hot beverage most mornings before starting our day (even if we're mad at each other).

I guess I'll add here that we have a rule, you can go to sleep mad, you can wake up mad but you can't go to sleep mad a second time. What ever it was usually gets worked out over the morning tea, after dinner the latest.


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## Plan 9 from OS

CharlieParker said:


> Another thread reminded me of this, we share a hot beverage most mornings before starting our day (even if we're mad at each other).
> 
> I guess I'll add here that we have a rule, you can go to sleep mad, you can wake up mad but you can't go to sleep mad a second time. What ever it was usually gets worked out over the morning tea, after dinner the latest.


We've been working out early in the mornings. We haven't done it together, but we will eat breakfast together prior to the day starting. It's nice to have one on one time like this.


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## Kurosity

We laugh a lot together. We also make a great team when dealing with an issue with our children. I actually love the fact that we have never had a fight over raising our kids. Even with all our struggles in our marriage we make great parents together (We will see how we do in the teen years lol).

We like the same television shows and watch The Walking Dead together every Sunday night (well not right now waiting for season to start up again) but snuggling on the couch to watch a show is great. 
Being that it is summer we rent movies and watch them once a week after putting the children to bed and we take turns picking the movie. I tease him when the choice he picks is not that great and if I pick a so called "chick flick" he rolls his eyes and suffers through it, sometimes he likes them too.

My favorite time is when we are in the back yard in the evening just having a conversation about nothing and everything at once. It reminds me of the way we were in the start of our relationship.


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## yellowstar

These are great and are actually making me feel more positively about my marriage. 

I love that we are supportive of each other. Husband has always been this way, very willing to support my dreams, wants, desires etc and I more recently have learned to play a more supportive role of his wants/needs. I love that we both make a good parenting team. I also love that want the other to be happy and try hard to work on our individual issues so we can be better people and partners.

The more I read the more I realize how much husband is probably better to me than him. This thread is a great reminder to me that I need to work on myself AND to work on being a better wife to him.


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## Kurosity

This is a great thread because I tend to focus on the negative and here I am thinking about all the positives and the things that I love about my husband and our marriage. It makes the struggles feel really small right now! Thanks OP for posting this 

Glad I came here to TAM today before work. It is a good way to start my day.


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## Wiserforit

It just amazes me how this wife knocks herself out for this family. 

And kids are just so much fun. Best time of my life.


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## TCSRedhead

My husband supports me and believes in me even when I doubt myself. He always pushes me to do better and is there to hold me when I fall.


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## committed4ever

A baby... Girrllll! We're sooooo excited. I guess I'm more excited for H because a boy as oldest would have been fine with me and of course a little girl is just precious. But it took us so long to conceive that he think just in case we can't have another one a girl will be close with her parents even after she's grown. Silly goose!

Anyway he couldn't stop smiling and rubbing my belly. It sucked that he had to drop back to work for a couple hours but he will be going in late tomorrow and so will I.


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## Ikaika

committed4ever said:


> A baby... Girrllll! We're sooooo excited. I guess I'm more excited for H because a boy as oldest would have been fine with me and of course a little girl is just precious. But it took us so long to conceive that he think just in case we can't have another one a girl will be close with her parents even after she's grown. Silly goose!
> 
> Anyway he couldn't stop smiling and *rubbing my belly*. It sucked that he had to drop back to work for a couple hours but he will be going in late tomorrow and so will I.


congratulations.

http://youtu.be/99sPvjG6YM8


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## Caribbean Man

My wife and I talk and laugh together about almost everything!
Even when we're arguing one of us would just say something stupid and we both start laughing.

I also like how we work together.
We do almost everything together.


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## Laila8

-We always have fun together, even if we're doing something boring like folding laundry
-He is a devoted dad; he is never too busy to play with the kids, change diapers, sing songs, take them to the park, etc.
-We laugh all the time and have a similar sense of humor
-We enjoy watching the same TV shows
-We have a hot sex life and we can never keep our hands off each other
-We always call each other affectionate pet names
-We never miss a chance to say I love you
-He is a great provider
-Family is the most important thing to us


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## Jakobi Greenleaf

There are some things that I enjoy that my wife has no interest in. Her lack of interest has never been a barrier to me doing those things.


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## diwali123

I'm trying to get weight loss surgery. I'm on a lot of boards for people going through it and so often the spouse is just against it or makes negative comments or just doesn't care. 
He has been 100% supportive the whole time. I've been on a roller coaster with the insurance company and he is with me every step of the way. 
I know after surgery he will do everything he can to take care of me.


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## TCSRedhead

Knowing I'm stuck in an airport and ant see the game, Hub is texting me updates!


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## JustPuzzled

We never stay mad. We fight sometimes, and there are sulks (mostly me), but it's like a rainstorm comes by and cleans the air.

We don't seem to have lingering resentments.

We kiss and hug a lot.


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## firefly789

My H is a kind person. People like to be around him, and so do I. He takes time to talk with me. He listens to me and respects my opinions. I listen to him and respect his opinions and ask him for advice on things. I don't feel anxious when I am with him. Together, we are good parents and work as a team. He makes me feel loved. Really, truly, and deeply loved.


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## TCSRedhead

JustPuzzled said:


> Bruins or 'Hawks?
> 
> Going into triple OT.


Bruins. I'll always be a Beantown girl at heart!


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## Lyris

My marriage is home to me.


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## Affaircare

Something positive about my marriage? Well GEEZ I'm married to a guy who is Jerry Garcia's doppelganger and who also happens to look and act like Santa! In fact, when we go to Walmart, he purposely wears red or a "wintery" looking plaid so that when kids see him, he can say "Shhh...I'm on vacation because it's not christmas-time. Have you been good this year?" 

My Dear Hubby is smart, funny, handsome, interesting, kind, gentle, thoughtful...but my favorite thing about him has got to be that I honestly LIKE the guy. If I wasn't married to him, I'd be his friend and hang out with him and play games with him and drink a beer with him. He's that kind of guy! I'll give you an example. Today our youngest daughter (the apple of her daddy's eye) said "Hey dad what's your email?' Of course, what she meant was to ask for his email address because she wanted to send him something. His reply? _"My email is a storage device on the internet by which I can send and receive electronic 'mail'. Is that not what your email is?"_ 

ROFL!!!! :rofl: Seriously who wouldn't love a guy like that?


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## Affaircare

See?  I get to live with him! Aren't I lucky?


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## Ikaika

I am so happy folks are posting more in this forum (area) of TAM as of recent times. I am not suggesting other forums are not important or vital to the discussion, but it is nice to know that long term marriages do exist and do so successfully... not perfectly but successfully. 

I like the fact that my wife will accept and have intimacy with an imperfect individual as myself. I am willing to do the same.


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## Lyris

If I had to choose only one thing to be, I would choose to be my husband's wife.


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## I'mInLoveWithMyHubby

My husbands phenomenal support for me. I also am very supportive if my husband too.

My husband loves to listen to me to whatever I have to say. I also do the same for him. We talk to each other everyday throughout the day. Everyday always calls me a few times a day when he's at work to chit chat for a couple minutes. At home we have one on one time to talk as well. We truly are best friends as well as husband and wife. The funny thing is that he's very reserved towards other people.


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## SimplyAmorous

I admire & Respect him ... he is a GOOD man, couldn't ask for a better Father....always honest & True.... 

He's virtually never let me down (intentionally hurt me)...It's funny...One day I was thinking about this, couldn't think of 1 thing -racking my brain ...I said this to him....he immediately comes back with ...."Yes, I did...that time I was late picking you up after school and you got grounded"... 

It was like he carried that all these yrs... he was telling me how bad he felt... Kinda blew me away...

Every morning when the alarm goes off, he jumps back in bed & holds me for 10 minutes... always an  on his lips... and when he walks in the door coming home... I am the 1st thing he looks for to wrap his arms around ....



> *Lyris said*: If I had to choose only one thing to be, I would choose to be my husband's wife.


 I 2nd this......every dream I've ever dreamed came forth from our union together.. Can't imagine life without him walking beside me holding my hand.


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## heartsbeating

I make up goofy dances. Usually while in my pajamas, hair messy, no makeup and the urge hits to start making up ridiculous dance moves. What I love is that he still entertains this with good humor! My breakfast dance is DYNAMITE!

I like if we're putting laundry away together, sometimes he'll put a pair of boxer briefs on his head and starts goofing about. My contribution to this thread is, I like that we can be goof-balls together.


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## treyvion

heartsbeating said:


> I make up goofy dances. Usually while in my pajamas, hair messy, no makeup and the urge hits to start making up ridiculous dance moves. What I love is that he still entertains this with good humor! My breakfast dance is DYNAMITE!
> 
> I like if we're putting laundry away together, sometimes he'll put a pair of boxer briefs on his head and starts goofing about. My contribution to this thread is, I like that we can be goof-balls together.


That's great bonding.


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## CharlieParker

heartsbeating said:


> I like that we can be goof-balls together.


Sometimes I think it as simple as 45% goof-ball, 45% sex and 10% just don't be an azzhole.

Everyone here is, and is with, a goof-ball, right?


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## WyshIknew

CharlieParker said:


> Sometimes I think it as simple as 45% goof-ball, 45% sex and 10% just don't be an azzhole.
> 
> Everyone here is, and is with, a goof-ball, right?


Yes!

Typical conversation in Wysh household.

Mrs Wysh passing by pats me on the bum or slips her arm round my waist, whatever.

Me "I've told you before, don't touch what you can't afford."

Mrs Wysh makes direct grab for my unmentionables. "Oh yea?"

Me "Oooohh Aaahhh Ooooohh."

Both *laughs*

Yes I know. Stoopid. But it makes us laugh.


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## Davelli0331

Lyris said:


> If I had to choose only one thing to be, I would choose to be my husband's wife.


I think that is one of the most wonderful things I have read on this site.

I love that my W and I have taken the typical married couple inside jokes to a new level. We often speak to each other in these weird, made up accents that sound sort of Russian. We have completely made up words for everyday things, and we often use those words around other people. Our interactions are laced with so many inside jokes that oftentimes other people have absolutely no idea what we're talking about.


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## MrsTitoFrito

I love when he randomly serenades me with country songs even though we both know he can't sing! 
I appreciate how he jogs with me around the block even though he can run a lot faster and longer. 
I adore his lopsided smile. 
I respect his decisions and I'm comforted by the fact that at the end of the day, I know he'll make the right decision for our family.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Accipiter777

I love how we are able to allow each other to be individuals.


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## WallaceBea

My husband and I have so much fun together. He is my best friend, I love hanging out with him, we always have a ton of fun!!!!!


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## over20

My husband has a great sense of humor...he taught me to laugh more in life and let the small things go...now both us laugh at life TOGETHER, which helps during the bad times.


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## richie33

I still look forward to seeing her face everyday.


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## melw74

I have a really strong marriage, I love to please my husband, I respect him, and in return i get nothing but love and respect back.

I have a kind and loving husband, hes a great husband to our two children, and hes a great step dad to my other 3 boys.

He works hard and he supports us, and in return i run a happy and loving home for him.

We talk any problems we have together, If one of us is unhappy about anything we discuss it.

Hes my soul mate. Through the years i have anxiety and depression, but since meeting my husband its kept at bay, I still have some bad days, but my husband is such a joker, he always brings me out of it.

We never shout at each either, I am not sure what i would do without him hes my rock.


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## Anonymous07

My husband can drive me crazy and sometimes can be really stupid with how he acts(marriage is a work in progress), but he is a really good man. I really love that man. He has always been really understanding, caring, and goes out of his way to help others. We both have the same sense of stupid humor and I always enjoy my time with him. He is also an amazing dad. Watching him interact with our son makes my heart melt.


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## CharlotteMcdougall

My husband is a very loving and patient gentleman. He puts up with my crazy family and he is a devoted uncle to the nieces on my side. I can't stop smiling when I see him playing with them. It is nice that while my husband does not want children, he isn't some mean child hater who cannot show love to youngsters.

There is also our wonderful sexual connection which is teaching me about emotional intimacy. My husband makes me want to be a better woman.


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## CharlotteMcdougall

Anonymous07 said:


> *My husband can drive me crazy and sometimes can be really stupid with how he acts*(marriage is a work in progress), but he is a really good man. I really love that man. He has always been really understanding, caring, and goes out of his way to help others. We both have the same sense of stupid humor and I always enjoy my time with him. He is also an amazing dad. Watching him interact with our son makes my heart melt.


:iagree: Mine too. I had to learn not to let his silly choices anger me so much. After all, I do dumb things too. 

Sometimes men become like children when they get married. Though my husband is very educated and bright, he sometimes has lapses with common sense.


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## NobodySpecial

All of our fights end with THAT'S what you meant when you said xxxx ? Oh man, I get it now. I see why you thought/felt... It would be nice if some day we could say the right thing the first time. In the meantime, we always get through.

I love him more than life itself.


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## As'laDain

i crave my wife.


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## Blossom Leigh

Very intelligent
Highly emotionally intelligent EXCEPT his own denial/insecurities
Articulate
Witty
Very unique gift in his intelligence that I don't have a word to describe, but it makes me cry every time I witness it. touches me deeply.
Handsome
Great Cook
Love his aggressiveness in bed
Great Kisser
Intelligent Lover
Love watching him play pool - excellent player
Emotionally deep
Empathetic
Consistent work ethic


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## Advocado

Even when he gets things wrong, he means well. 

If push came to shove I suppose I could (just) live without him, but the thing is I *want *him, regardless of whether or not I need him. 

Love him SOOOOOOOO much.


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## daffodilly

I am lucky that I still savor even 5 minutes of time I can get alone with him.

I love my children to the moon and back, but I still feel like a girl with a high school crush when we get our quiet time together at the end of the day!


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## the2ofus

I love the fun we have, the silliness, the tickling, the bad jokes, the songs he'll make up and sing to me or one of the kids. 

I love the way he enjoys our kids, nurturing them in only the way a dad can.

I love the way he holds me when tears are just flowing as I deal with life and stupid people.

Often there is a lot of static electricity in our house and when we kiss there is a spark, to which he says "look at that we still got it, feel that spark!". I love that he's fun but also that's not the only way we feel a spark.

Still calls me beautiful, to the point that when my kids say the blessing for a meal they think a normal part of thanking God for the food is thanking God for dad's beautiful wife.


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## over20

My hubs has the VERY best sense of humor....SNL kind. He has made me laugh almost every day since I met him....he amazes me.. I love how he can make a whole room crack up.....people lean on his every word...


----------



## anchorwatch

Together since '73. Still can't get enough of each other...

Ain't that right dear?


----------



## StayInIt

My husband is hands down the most fun person I know. He can have a good time anywhere and always has PMA. He also looks like a freaking underwear model.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## jld

I feel so lucky dh doesn't get mad about the things other husbands do. I do **** tests and have tantrums, and he is not rocked. And despite my shortcomings, he still tells me he is "fully satisfied" with me, and that he hears my words, but knows my heart. 

They say here that there is no such thing as unconditional love from a spouse, but it sure feels like dh loves me unconditionally.


----------



## As'laDain

jld said:


> I feel so lucky dh doesn't get mad about the things other husbands do. I do **** tests and have tantrums, and he is not rocked. And despite my shortcomings, he still tells me he is "fully satisfied" with me, and that he hears my words, but knows my heart.
> 
> They say here that there is no such thing as unconditional love from a spouse, but it sure feels like dh loves me unconditionally.


people who feel there is no such thing as unconditional love do not understand that unconditional love has nothing to do with how we feel _in the moment_.


----------



## jld

As'laDain said:


> people who feel there is no such thing as unconditional love do not understand that unconditional love has nothing to do with how we feel _in the moment_.


As'laDain, that is _beautiful!_


----------



## CuddleBug

Plan 9 from OS said:


> Let's shift gears here. I'm tired of reading all the negative threads out there. I post on the ones where I feel I can help out, but it can be a drain. So let's post about what we love about our spouse and marriage.
> 
> I love the fact that my wife and I can talk about anything. Whenever an issue comes up that bothers us - whether it's something one of us did, work related, friend related, etc - we're talking about it. I think we squash a lot of bigger problems when we talk things out early on. Also, I like knowing that my wife wants to talk to me and seek comfort/advice about other problems affecting her.



- she is genuinely a loving and caring wifee
- she is a hard worker, full time, chores and not a princess!!!
- she is generous, surprises and treats
- she is faithful
- she didn't sleep around and party and give herself for free many times
- she gives me space when I need or want it
- she is highly intelligent and educated
- she is finally losing weight, new cloths, and starting to get a sex drive:smthumbup:


----------



## QuietSoul

About marriage: I feel like the really rough times in our marriage make it more valuable, because we got through them

About H: He's really sweet and genuinely caring, he gets my random,left field, slightly disturbing humour , and I feel like I can fully be myself AND be loved
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## heartsbeating

We can groove to Cameo in the car together and still manage to find each other sexually desirable afterwards.

Word up!


----------



## Adeline

he's a hard worker and a good provider, financially. I'll give him that.


----------



## FizzBomb

heartsbeating said:


> We can groove to Cameo in the car together and still manage to find each other sexually desirable afterwards.
> 
> Word up!


LOL I love that song ... well I did in the 80's!

We joke around with each other.
Sex has gotten better in every way.
Nine out of ten times we have the same opinion about a person we've met.


----------



## annoyedhubby

I get sex. 
About it. I can't think of a single other thing positive about it. And I don't think that is worth it.


----------



## long_done

The best thing about the marriage with my STBXW:

1. she is one of the nicest people in the world
2. she is a very devoted mother
3. Lack of drama in the relationship (good and bad)
4. she is pretty frugal, like me, and we have saved up a lot of money
5. she is pretty independent, like me


----------



## the2ofus

He make me laugh even when we're fighting! No one I would rather do anything with even fight


----------



## Adelais

Mr. IMFAR has a lot of good qualities. Too many to name, but here are a few.
He's thoughtful, kind, loving, a wonderful father, good cook, has good hygiene, keeps himself fit, keeps trying, makes me laugh, is a good role model for the children, knows my body and is the perfect lover, he loves me and makes me feel attractive and desirable.


----------



## jld

long_done said:


> The best thing about the marriage with my STBXW:
> 
> 1. she is one of the nicest people in the world
> 2. she is a very devoted mother
> 3. Lack of drama in the relationship (good and bad)
> 4. she is pretty frugal, like me, and we have saved up a lot of money
> 5. she is pretty independent, like me


She cheated on you, long done? That is why you are divorcing?


----------



## alte Dame

My H is a very respectful man. We never get below the belt when we argue.


----------



## heartsbeating

I asked my husband to name one positive thing about our marriage.

He replied - that we both believe we have a future together.


----------



## Omego

The amazing chemistry we share which gets us through the difficult times.


----------



## heartsbeating

intheory said:


> We used to have to go to the laundromat in our early 20's. God, we had a blast  We would watch the clothes tumble through the glass door and he would say something like, "if I was that black T-shirt this is what I would sound like (then make falling and spinning sounds)" I know it sounds dumb; but it wasn't.


I love this.

Great to read your post!


----------



## Plan 9 from OS

Glad to see someone resurrect this thread. Originally done as reaction to all of the other crap seen on the other forums where everything was nonstop doom and gloom. Sometimes you question whether you truly belong at TAM when your primary goal is to try to improve what is already a solid marriage.


----------



## scatty

Don't you all just love it when someone posts about how you shouldn't brag about how great your relationship is, and everyone who frequents these forums should be gloom and doom? Then they get banned and despite being a good person, you are a little HAPPY inside?

Officially, we are not married. In heart, I consider us to be. 

Positive thing- we give without expecting. Sometimes our spouse can't give- sometimes we can't give. We hope it evens out, but no one is keeping score. Because when you keep score, no one wins.


----------



## Affaircare

This week was a rough week--a friend of ours from church died suddenly. 

What I realized about Dear Hubby is that he is a rock. He is very steady and dependable, and he is clueless about how to "show emotions" even though he feels them. So when I'm sad, if I tell him, "I could use a hug" he is THRILLED and hugs me. 

He went with me to the funeral, helped me get ready for the services, drove me to a training thing just to be with me, and we went together to a family event, right after everything with the funeral. So he was just...there. 

I can see how being quiet is misinterpreted, but it's not that he doesn't "feel"--he just is steady about it and unlike me, his emotions don't tumble about. Mine do. And we are a good compliment to each other. I teach him how to be expressive, and he teaches me how to maintain inner peace even in tough time.


----------



## karole

My marriage is the best and most rewarding part of my life.........


----------



## Bobby5000

Going on vacation and trips together, expanding horizons, raising children together, seeing a new way of looking at things, having someone who cares and is willing to help when you are ill, having someone who knows you better than you know yourself, being with a good person, having company.


----------



## changedbeliefs

Bobby5000 said:


> ...having someone who knows you better than you know yourself...


This sentiment bugs me. No one knows you better than you know yourself, they just don't. I think the better phrasing may be (and correct me if you don't think it's accurate), "they call me on my bulls**t when I don't want to own up." When they do that, someone translates it as, "oh, yeah, you're right, boy you really know me..."


----------



## jld

changedbeliefs said:


> This sentiment bugs me. No one knows you better than you know yourself, they just don't. I think the better phrasing may be (and correct me if you don't think it's accurate), "they call me on my bulls**t when I don't want to own up." When they do that, someone translates it as, "oh, yeah, you're right, boy you really know me..."


Well, there is truth to what you are saying. 

I do think my dh realizes things about me that I am not aware of, though. I can be pretty idealistic, and he more realistic, at least in some ways.

People observing us from the outside can know things about us that we, always on the inside, just may not be able to see.


----------



## over20

intheory said:


> Great idea for a thread, Plan 9
> 
> He's so good-looking.
> 
> I still want him so much.
> 
> He smells good. His natural smell, I don't mean colognes.
> 
> He's so funny. Not comedian funny. Just ordinary, little remarks and facial gestures.
> 
> He has good hygiene.
> 
> He is kind to animals.
> 
> He has practicality and an eye for details that I completely lack.
> 
> He has a quiet, private spirituality.
> 
> He tears up at genuinely sad or touching things he sees on TV. It's kind of a trip when I look over and see how his eyes look.
> 
> Never hassled me or pressured me to have kids. Which would have been a dealbreaker for me.
> 
> We allow each other alone time.
> 
> I don't eat meat or wear leather. He does. We both accept that difference about each other.
> 
> 
> It made me feel good to see that other couples here also claim that they have fun going grocery shopping. We always have.
> 
> We used to have to go to the laundromat in our early 20's. God, we had a blast  We would watch the clothes tumble through the glass door and he would say something like, "if I was that black T-shirt this is what I would sound like (then make falling and spinning sounds)" I know it sounds dumb; but it wasn't.
> 
> So, many things I could list.
> 
> I don't know what I'd be if I wasn't married to him.


Oh honey....your post made me smile....your marriage sounds so refreshing....I am glad you are on TAM


----------



## ticktock33

I love this kind of thread! It's nice to see great things instead of focusing on what is wrong.

Our main goals in life is to make each other happy.

We let each other know how much we love each other.

He is generous.

Can admit when he's wrong.

He loves animals as much as I do.

He always has the best intentions.

We like to see each other in our elements.

We are proud of each other.

We get each other weird things.

We have a million inside jokes.

We know each other so well...so look or comment goes unnoticed. 

When we aren't with each other for longer than usual it starts to get uncomfortable. We need each other around.

He is my best friend in the world that I can tell anything to. We just can't shake each other lol.


----------



## the2ofus

changedbeliefs said:


> This sentiment bugs me. No one knows you better than you know yourself, they just don't. I think the better phrasing may be (and correct me if you don't think it's accurate), "they call me on my bulls**t when I don't want to own up." When they do that, someone translates it as, "oh, yeah, you're right, boy you really know me..."


Honest truth my husband knew I was pregnant before I did all but one time, that's 6 times. He often knew that I was truly in labor before I knew it. And yes there are times that I see that he is sinking into a funk before he sees it and it happens in reverse also. So yeah, sometimes he does know me better than I know myself.


----------



## ticktock33

intheory said:


> I like those
> 
> [So hope you guys can get your own place soon and find a method of bc that works for you -- referencing your other thread:cat:]


Thanks intheory!


----------



## bbdad

We have our ups and downs like everyone. However, we have always been faithful. We have gone through hell and back with the loss of a child. Sure, there are things that both of us wish could be improved in the relationship. However, there is no one we would rather go through life with.


----------



## that_girl

When it's a good day (which happens a couple times a week now), we can just sit and say nothing, do nothing and just "be".

It's calm and comfortable. Like an old shoe.


----------



## Anonymous07

the2ofus said:


> Honest truth my husband knew I was pregnant before I did all but one time, that's 6 times. He often knew that I was truly in labor before I knew it. And yes there are times that I see that he is sinking into a funk before he sees it and it happens in reverse also. So yeah, sometimes he does know me better than I know myself.


Similar here.

My husband can notice things about me, that I don't always see. He knew I was pregnant before I did, too. He asked if I was pregnant, I said no. Didn't think I was. Took a test and it turned out he was right. I also can see things about my husband, that he doesn't always notice about himself, so it goes both ways. 

I also think I see glimmers of the man I dated, the man I fell in love with again and it's been great to see.


----------



## IWantGreatMarriage

I love that my husband cares about me, as in really cares and I can trust him completely to take care of me if am unable to. And when am sick which unfortunately is often, he takes care of everything in the house and puts me to bed, like a baby. And checks up on me during the day.
I feel safe 

I also love the fact that I don't need a pillow to sleep cos am always wrapped like a doll around him and he never complains that I suffocate him  or that he is too hot


----------



## ariel_angel77

The thing that drew me to him the most, he is so sweet. He is nice to everyone, and especially to me.
He is a wonderful father.
He makes me feel like the most special woman in the world.
He cares about my needs in bed. Actually CARES, more than about his own.
He makes LOVE to me instead of just sex.
I love the way it feels for him to hold me, physically and emotionally.
Through all the crap we've been through, my heart has never felt so safe with someone.
There is not a day that he doesn't greet me with a smile on his face. There is a happiness about him that cannot be extinguished.
He works so that I can stay home with my baby.
He never treats me with anything but love.
When we did have problems, he actually wanted to FIX it. He went to counseling and changed it and admitted his mistakes.
We have so much in common. We can do anything together.
We have a passion that will never go away. <3

Love this thread, btw.


----------



## John Lee

Someone can definitely know you better than you know yourself at times -- like you feel down about something and you don't know why, and they explain it to you.


----------



## tryingtobegood

Today was the first time i stared into my wife's eye's during sex. We have been married for 17 years and from the beginning i felt self conscious about my sex face lol. But after reading a post from someone on here yesterday saying they always look into each others eyes, made me do it.

We have a pretty decent sex life but....i think i actually made love to my wife for the first time. She has always been used to turning her head and keeping her eyes closed, but after a few times she noticed i was into her and nothing else existed.

She said it felt awkward a little but her overall body movement and actions were different today. She was into me in a whole different way as well. All i can say was it was amazing to me. I just felt so connected, i am kinda lost for words on how to explain it. YAYY!!!


----------



## over20

tryingtobegood said:


> Today was the first time i stared into my wife's eye's during sex. We have been married for 17 years and from the beginning i felt self conscious about my sex face lol. But after reading a post from someone on here yesterday saying they always look into each others eyes, made me do it.
> 
> We have a pretty decent sex life but....i think i actually made love to my wife for the first time. She has always been used to turning her head and keeping her eyes closed, but after a few times she noticed i was into her and nothing else existed.
> 
> She said it felt awkward a little but her overall body movement and actions were different today. She was into me in a whole different way as well. All i can say was it was amazing to me. I just felt so connected, i am kinda lost for words on how to explain it. YAYY!!!


What a beautiful post.......and I agree with you


----------



## SunnyWife

Celebrating 20+ years together. My Hubby is my soulmate. He accepts all the craziness that comes with me being a creative type. We understand each other even when we say nothing. He's an awesome Dad to our 3 teenage/1 young adult children. His sense of family is what drew me to him. His sense of humour is the glue that has kept us together all these years. I can be grumpy and mad at him and he tells me how cute I look when I am angry --- how can I stay mad? I end up laughing and then we talk it out. We don't fight much since we do manage to talk things out. We share the same deep sense of religion. We still do things for each other and spoil each other rotten. And he has the best way of giving compliments! I love this man so incredibly much. Looking forward to the next 20+ years together.


----------



## over20

SunnyWife said:


> Celebrating 20+ years together. My Hubby is my soulmate. He accepts all the craziness that comes with me being a creative type. We understand each other even when we say nothing. He's an awesome Dad to our 3 teenage/1 young adult children. His sense of family is what drew me to him. His sense of humour is the glue that has kept us together all these years. I can be grumpy and mad at him and he tells me how cute I look when I am angry --- how can I stay mad? I end up laughing and then we talk it out. We don't fight much since we do manage to talk things out. We share the same deep sense of religion. We still do things for each other and spoil each other rotten. And he has the best way of giving compliments! I love this man so incredibly much. Looking forward to the next 20+ years together.


Congratulations Sunnywife (a cute name) to 20 yrs!! 


and welcome to TAM!!


----------



## commonsenseisn't

15 years married here. My wife is fiercely loyal to me and our marriage. It has helped to heal my broken heart from my first wife who was equally disloyal. Now that I see the difference I have a very deep appreciation for my wife and marriage. I'll never take it for granted.


----------



## Marduk

After being married well over a decade I feel like we're actually starting to get to know each other -- and trust each other deeply -- now.


----------



## heartsbeating

We made it through the wilderness... 

Our marriage is in a much stronger place than it was when I joined.


----------



## As'laDain

something positive about my marriage... 

well, my wife and i have been through hell and back. we have come from a place where we couldnt stand each other to where we are now... 

today, we are on fire. i dont know any other way to put it. we manage to keep the passion going even though the army pulls me away for training and deployments every time i turn around. 

my wife is ****ing awesome. i couldnt stand her when we first got married, but i learned to love her. and i mean, i crave her now. i miss her now. im currently away from her on account of the army and i cant stop thinking about her. her texts to me tell me that she feels the same way. 

and this from where we were?
holy **** am i lucky.


----------



## Caribbean Man

My wife took me shopping on Saturday evening. I actually enjoyed it!

Then on Saturday night , she took me out to diner at a really nice restaurant.

She paid for_ everything_.


----------



## HappyGilmore

We've been together for over a decade now, and we love each other now more than ever. We share so many things. It may sound funny to someone else, but we are each other's fly-fishing partner. No one else can take that role (and with our fanatical dedication to trout fishing, no one else would want to. No one else wants to fish for 12 hours straight without stopping!). We even have made up our own jargon that we use at the river, and no one else can understand what we are saying. 

And our sex life has only gotten better. Yesterday, I told him that our "younger selves" would be so jealous of us now, because the sex is amazing! We have become more in tune with each other over the years, and I believe that is the secret.


----------



## Quant

The way she always is grips me in the morning.


----------



## jasmine9

My three boys


----------



## SimplyAmorous

My husband was tarring the driveway late afternoon yesterday...filling those cracks...our driveway is 750 ft long...I helped a little in the beginning, then went to read a book crashed out on the porch....

A little later I walked to the top thinking "I need to help him, I'm being lazy".....I carried my book with me...when I got up there, he just went on how he is happy I'm there, didn't need my help but enjoys my presence...It just means something to him...just makes you feel good ya know... 

.. I got him a big glass of Ice water & ran back for some gloves .... it's just his attitude...he's always such a thankful man..for the smallest things... .even if I'm just hanging around with my head in a book.


----------



## cool12

we've quit drinking together again and it feels like it's going to stick this time


----------



## Chuck71

it ended last year.


----------



## jorgegene

Every woman I'd ever dated played games. Even the good ones.
I think it's just something they learn growing up and dealing with guys. Not sure, but it's really tiresome.

I finally found one that doesn't play games. In fact she doesn't know how to even if she wanted to.


----------



## Chuck71

Once you learn how the games are played...it can be a bit of fun

watching them walk into their own messes


----------



## jaquen

We're still in love.

We're each other's biggest fans. We are very supportive of one another's dreams and goals.

Not a day goes by that we aren't physically affectionate. There are always kisses, hugs, cuddles, etc to be had.

We still have strong sexual chemistry. 

She knows me even more than I sometimes give her credit for.

We continue to create a marriage that speaks to our needs, not follow arbitrary marital "rules". I love that about us.

We're partners but still maintain healthy individuality.

We are spiritually compatible. That's extremely important to us. We see the Lord as the welcome third party in our marriage.


----------



## steam

in love, she swallows, great cook, rims, worlds best pie maker, hand jobs, PIV, great mother/grandmother, goes to nude beach with me, cuddles, loves porn, great gardner,.....


----------



## Chuck71

steam said:


> in love, she swallows, great cook, rims, worlds best pie maker, hand jobs, PIV, great mother/grandmother, goes to nude beach with me, cuddles, loves porn, great gardner,.....


when will she be cloned?


----------



## Husbandologist

My wife and I have learned to love each other by serving one another.


----------



## ifweonly

Most on TAM know that my wife and I married very young-19 & 21, between semester break. What most do not know is that she gave up a four year, fully paid scholarship to move to where I was going to school to marry me. She was my first and only girlfriend.

We both really do Love, Honor & Obey without any reservation. My wife of almost 53 years is soooo special, so loving and caring I just do not understand how I got so lucky. Surely it has been richer/poorer, better/worse, sickness/health and oh boy --- we are still alive!!! 

There are so many wonderful things I could write but I want to encourage others that are younger that marriage can and does get better as long that both have the mindset to make it that way. And --- Oh Yes --- the sex is just amazing! Someday we may get it right but until then we will continue to practice frequently --- very frequently!!


----------



## unbelievable

The best part about being married is it removes you from the dating pool where you could encounter serial killers, meth cookers, psychos, geeks, and freaks of all descriptions. Mine aint entirely perfect but she hasn't set me on fire in my sleep. She's not running around on me, not overspending, not torturing my dogs, not doing or selling drugs, doesn't worship the Devil, isn't a Communist spy, doesn't get message from God or the CIA through our smoke detector. Life could be worse and it is for lots of people.


----------



## As'laDain

intheory said:


> :rofl:
> 
> That's setting the bar a bit low.


but apparently not TOO low for the real world...

Wife Allegedly Sets House on Fire While Husband Sleeps | NBC New York


yikes!


----------



## unbelievable

Things could always be worse.


----------



## Ikaika

As to why I wonder why I should even stay here on TAM, I think my issues are more mental and personal than they are marriage related: 

1. Neither of us are mismatched, one LD the other HD... both of us are xHD. 

2. As far as I know neither of us are cheating on each other, at least the typical red flags are not present.

3. Even though we have a challenge as parents of a special needs child, we do our best to raise boys that would be a respectable co-worker, neighbor and spouse. 

4. Neither of us are extremely psychotic, well I get severely depressed at time (and yes it gets extreme), but we (I) don't take it out on (her) each other.

5. Even after 20 years (well 20 year this coming December), we still communicate and go out on dates. 

6. We respect each other and find each other "hot" and attractive. At least I know my wife is "hot" and still my flag raises with no problem when she de-robes 

The list goes on... so I still wonder with this particular sub-forum and my apparent non-issues - why am I still here? 

Malama pono


----------



## Anonymous07

drerio said:


> The list goes on... so I still wonder with this particular sub-forum and my apparent non-issues - why am I still here?
> 
> Malama pono


Because it's nice to see some positives in the world of negatives. We see plenty horrible things, so to see a happy marriage is nice. 

I know you helped my husband and my own marriage.


----------



## Ikaika

Anonymous07 said:


> Because it's nice to see some positives in the world of negatives. We see plenty horrible things, so to see a happy marriage is nice.
> 
> I know you helped my husband and my own marriage.


Thank you for the kind words. I do hope the best for your marriage and family. Sending you, your H and son Aloha.


----------



## commonsenseisn't

Husbandologist said:


> My wife and I have learned to love each other by serving one another.


This is a secret few people have found. 


Good on you!


----------



## subversiveHubby

After all the sh_t I have put her through, she loves me! She has stuck it out with me through thick and thin even if I might not have deserved it. This could be a blessing or a punishment, i prefer to look at it as a blessing. 

She loves me!


----------



## tulsy

Plan 9 from OS said:


> Post something positive about your marriage.


It's over


----------



## Runs like Dog

Nobody lives forever.


----------



## Chuck71

tulsy said:


> It's over


:iagree: :rofl: was my exact reply here couple months ago


----------



## Mr The Other

Plan 9 from OS said:


> Let's shift gears here. I'm tired of reading all the negative threads out there. I post on the ones where I feel I can help out, but it can be a drain. So let's post about what we love about our spouse and marriage.
> 
> I love the fact that my wife and I can talk about anything. Whenever an issue comes up that bothers us - whether it's something one of us did, work related, friend related, etc - we're talking about it. I think we squash a lot of bigger problems when we talk things out early on. Also, I like knowing that my wife wants to talk to me and seek comfort/advice about other problems affecting her.


She knew an internet site where we downloaded Game of Thrones episodes and we enjoyed watching them together.


----------



## Q tip

Everything. Simply and absolutely everything!!

Every day is a holiday, every meal is a feast!


----------



## billyjones219

I think my wife is beautiful, and after 10 years of marriage, she is even more desirable than the day i met her.

we are also very good parents together.


----------



## ChargingCharlie

She has to work late tonight, so the kids and I can enjoy some fun, non-stressful time together.


----------



## Accipiter777

Plan 9 from OS said:


> Let's shift gears here. I'm tired of reading all the negative threads out there. I post on the ones where I feel I can help out, but it can be a drain. So let's post about what we love about our spouse and marriage.
> 
> I love the fact that my wife and I can talk about anything. Whenever an issue comes up that bothers us - whether it's something one of us did, work related, friend related, etc - we're talking about it. I think we squash a lot of bigger problems when we talk things out early on. Also, I like knowing that my wife wants to talk to me and seek comfort/advice about other problems affecting her.


Simply put: She understands my needs, and I understand her needs.


----------



## Abc123wife

If you had asked me to post something positive 2 years ago, I am not sure if I could have. My husband and I had just become kinda miserable a lot of the time and were making each other miserable. But I think we have completely turned that around.

So.. I think the most positive thing I can say is I am thankful for my husband's willingness for us to re-evaluate and work on our marriage together when about 18 months ago I said I was tired of not ever seeing him smile when I walked into the room. 

After being married for 24 years and both of us falling into the habit of putting our kids before ourselves for so long, he was all in on finding ways of turning that thinking around. We were talking last night and mutually agreed that the past year is the happiest we had in all our years together (despite having some rough, stressful other stuff going on). 

There's still more for us to work on, but I really feel loved by my husband and I feel really loving towards him, a big change from 18 months ago.


----------



## thenub

I love that my wife is my best and most trusted friend. She is a great lover and mother. We tease each other constantly in a playful manner and we can always finish a sentence off for each other. We think so much alike it is sometimes scary. When one of us gets sick, neither of us complain about picking up the slack around the house while looking after the one that is sick. It's almost like our bodies know that when so an so is sick, your turn comes when that person is feeling better. 
Mind you we have issues now and then but always work them out. We both enjoy camping and fishing a lot so we try getting out without the kids ( she even initiated in the boat, had to find a small cove out of sight). We also do things separate from each other. I like to take my youngest daughter out with the four wheelers and play around in the mud. My wife enjoys baking with our oldest daughter 
We've been married for just over 13 years and have been together for almost 30 years. I love her just a little more than I did yesterday and almost as much as I will tomorrow


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## Mr.Fisty

tulsy said:


> It's over


I knew someone was going to state that.


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## Kylie84

Aside from the fact neither of us have children from previous relationships THIS is what I love about my husband. And he is incredibly thoughtful, has a brilliant mind, is not a thug yet is not at all beta. Our marriage is wonderful because we compliment each other, both of us always ensure the other feels safe and we never put ourselves in a situation that could potentially lead to infidelity. :smthumbup:


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## ConanHub

We love to make each other laugh.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## MysticTeenager

I love that we can laugh together. And sometimes, during a fight he just starts smiling and I smile back and we forget everything and realise that what we were fighting about simply wasnt worth it.


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## SimplyAmorous

Kylie84 said:


> Aside from the fact neither of us have children from previous relationships THIS is what I love about my husband. And he is incredibly thoughtful, has a brilliant mind, is not a thug yet is not at all beta. Our marriage is wonderful because we compliment each other, both of us always ensure the other feels safe and we never put ourselves in a situation that could potentially lead to infidelity. :smthumbup:


I think Beta has gotten a bad rap due to Pick up artist articles, articles on the net slaughter the term as all p**y whipped doormats.. it's not the truth...

Many things on your list are GOOD BETA traits...

I suppose others may not have these interpretations. (I need to do a thread on this) but this is how I see them.. or have read from sources that make an awful lot of sense ...to me anyway..



> The *Alpha Traits* are those associated with classic “manly man” strengths. Power, dominance, physical ability, bravery, wealth, cool and confidence. Oh and good genes. These are the things that attract women and turn them on sexually. The Alpha Traits are linked to the dopamine response in women.
> 
> *Alpha *= attraction building = Dopamine = In Love = Excitement





> The *Beta Traits* are those associated with the strengths of being a nice guy / “family man”. Kindness, being a good listener, the ability to help with the children, dependability, thoughtfulness, compassion and patience. These all create a sense of comfort and safety for the woman, and relax her because she feels that if she became pregnant, the Beta Trait male isn’t going to abandon her and the baby.
> 
> *Beta *= comfort building = Oxytocin / Vasopressin = Pair Bond = Calm Enjoyment"


So Alpha Traits create attraction and that “in love” feeling, and Beta Traits create the pair bond and makes her feel relaxed enough to have sex. You need a balance of both Alpha and Beta in a marriage to maximize her desire to have sex with you.

So your Husband sounds a GOOD mixture of both Kylie84...but that's what we want !


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## Threetimesalady

After 56 years and near two months of marriage we are still alive...:smthumbup:....Older age is a new adventure in life...Believe me I could write a book....


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## meson

We can laugh at each others foibles without being offended.


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## scatty

I thought of something else that I love about my marriage. We don't hold grudges, give the silent treatment, or play the passive-aggressive losing game. 

We talk, work as a team to solve problems, and we never lie to each other, even if the truth is hard to hear.

I also love that he is a chef by trade and I HATE to cook. I love to clean and he HATES to clean. So I get delicious meals and he gets a clean home. Honestly, sometimes I think we just got lucky since we met when we were teens and had to learn as we went.


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## Pooh Bear

Plan 9 from OS said:


> Let's shift gears here. I'm tired of reading all the negative threads out there. I post on the ones where I feel I can help out, but it can be a drain. So let's post about what we love about our spouse and marriage.
> 
> I love the fact that my wife and I can talk about anything. Whenever an issue comes up that bothers us - whether it's something one of us did, work related, friend related, etc - we're talking about it. I think we squash a lot of bigger problems when we talk things out early on. Also, I like knowing that my wife wants to talk to me and seek comfort/advice about other problems affecting her.


My husband is very supportive emotionally of me and very smart. He is a fantastic father to our son.


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## survived

Been married to same woman for 45 years. Still in love with each other. Never any cheating between us. Sex is still great even after my prostate surgery 8 years ago. A good surgeon can do wonders. Retired and we do everything together.


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## Shoto1984

It's Over. :rofl: (I'm sure that's not original but I just couldn't help myself)


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## Meltherapist

Wow you all inspire me  I myself have been married for 15 years and love the challenges and trumps my partner and I have faced. We just get better as time goes on. Check out this U tube link by Dr. John Gottman about success in marriage.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xw9SE315GtA


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## Jmurphy

Threetimesalady said:


> After 56 years and near two months of marriage we are still alive...:smthumbup:....Older age is a new adventure in life...Believe me I could write a book....


beautiful  congrats on the continuing success


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## ConanHub

We are "athletic" in bed. &#55357;&#56833;
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## DCMarriageCounselor

After 14 years together I love that my wife intrudes into my selfishness where I think everything's about me....I can get obsessed with keeping our kid's on schedule and managing our routines in the house because it's the only way I can get some time for myself sometimes when all the to-dos are done. Sometimes, like tonight, she can read the vibe from our kids and knows they need to break the rules, stay up late, or go to bed without a bath so we they can set up their science fair project or go get sushi or whatever.

She planned our family's first trip to Disney back in October when I was up to my neck in editorial deadlines and convinced I'd never get my book written. I thought she was plotting with God like the Devil did when they planned on testing Job. I can totally overreact and exaggerate my discomfort to biblical proportions (clearly) and she knows and trusts her heart enough to stick to her guns and push me when I need it. 

This is what I call a true friendship.


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## MountainRunner

We still date each other. We have a date today. Yesterday was her birthday, so today we're going into "Old Sacramento" for lunch and scope out some of the museums, then dinner at one of our favorite dining establishments up here.

Looking forward to strolling through Old Sac holding her hand (stealing a kiss, or maybe even feeling her up if nobody is looking...*grin*) and taking everything in.


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## LongWalk

I'm divorced but I got two great kids.


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## Curse of Millhaven

My husband is not perfect (imperfections are usually the best parts anyway) and he is loving in his fashion. 

He lets me warm my always cold hands under his shirt and lets me cuddle next to him in bed and put my ice cold feet on his legs; he never complains about my stealing his warmth and will hold me if I ask him to. 

He makes me laugh just about every single day.

These are two reasons of many that I love him, but all I can think of today. Some days threads are all I have to cling to in this unraveling mess.


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## CincyBluesFan

My wife is my absolute best friend and I am hers. She's so smart, funny, beautiful, witty, and occasionally a hell of a pain in the butt. Would I change anything about her? Not for a second.

She has inspired me to be a better person for 29 years and counting. So many people warned us we were getting married too young (18 years old for both of us) and that it probably wouldn't last. The irony is most of them are now divorced and we're as in love as ever. Of course we argue about stuff that comes up in life but we don't go to bed angry. Sure there have been periods of time when both of us weren't feeling very sexual but we talk about it and work through it.

Love, respect, compromise, companionship, etc. You need it all. We've now grown past all the issues that doom marriages during earlier phases and have gotten to that golden era where you've become like one person with two parts. We are a couple. I'll love, honor, and cherish that woman, forsaking all others, until the day I die. She rocks my world.


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## SimplyAmorous

Ok..I thought this was sweet ...maybe our sense of humor is a little warped....Steak & BJ morning no less ... (that's one Holiday TAM always reminds you of -ha ha)....

I was lying in bed -talking about how I'll be getting up to take all the kids to IHOP to meet our oldest son for Breakfast in another town....he was getting dressed for work, he comes over to me, sits down...looks me in the eyes ...telling me not to drive too fast, ...(he always worries I'm going to hit a deer or something)...then he adds this to get his point across...

“I’ll be pi$$ed if you die.... I’ll have to kill myself so I can kick your a$$"..... I laughed so hard







. ..and felt so loved at the same time..


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## Married2Love

Love this forum! Finally something positive about marriage. I've been married for almost 20 years this coming June & even though it hasn't always been perfect It's been darn near close enough! My husband is my best friend, boy friend (always keep it fun & new like the beginning! DATE! DATE! DATE!) and my lover..... & our fire for each hasn't burned out yet! Loving all your all your cute & funny post! Thanks for sharing 
I Love Him Past The Moon! 20 years! by Myishia Jahmee Cakes - GoFundMe


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## Brigit

Plan 9 from OS said:


> Let's shift gears here. I'm tired of reading all the negative threads out there. I post on the ones where I feel I can help out, but it can be a drain. So let's post about what we love about our spouse and marriage.
> 
> I love the fact that my wife and I can talk about anything. Whenever an issue comes up that bothers us - whether it's something one of us did, work related, friend related, etc - we're talking about it. I think we squash a lot of bigger problems when we talk things out early on. Also, I like knowing that my wife wants to talk to me and seek comfort/advice about other problems affecting her.


My husband likes to cook for me. He enjoys cooking but he also enjoys watching me eating the meal. It's very sweet.


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## quiesedba

we have not killed each other


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## karole

Been with my husband almost 30 years. Can't imagine my life without him and hope I never have too. He's a wonderful man and I thank God for him every day. I know I am very fortunate to have a great marriage and for that I am thankful.


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## unbelievable

It's legally valid.


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## len51

Happily married for over forty years. We have been best friends for all of that time.


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## ConanHub

We can be stupid around each other with no fear. We love laughing at ourselves!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Affaircare

We just watched "Animal House" together and laughed our guts sore at John Belushi, then cried a little missing him. 

I love that we have similar memories like that and we can do it together.


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## SimplyAmorous

...that make life BIG, so the saying goes...

Yesterday Husband was lying on the cement working on the Tractor.. I was helping him position the mower deck he just put together , standing there with the crow bar lifting it up, so he could hook it underneath.... radio playing in the background.... "You are wonderful tonight" comes on.. he looks at me with this big Grin, says something about our song (we have many!).... then gets up off the ground just to hug me for that moment..... then he gets back down there....back to work!


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## happy as a clam

We're divorced!! :smthumbup:

:lol:

(Seriously though, I am now in an extremely fulfilling LTR with the love of my life. In all ways, he makes me happy, happy, Happy!)


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## 1karing1

My husband and I have been together 36 years. We found the key to a long marriage is praying together. When we don't know who is right, we pray about it and what's right becomes obvious, so we don't ever fight. It takes so many positive words to undo one thing that is mean, so be kind to each other, build each other up, flirt with each other and enjoy the journey. For more positive words and helps for a positive life come join our facebook group open to all Karing Journey. Blessings to all of you in your marriages!


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## heartsbeating

We were in the kitchen, cleaning up after dinner, he mentioned a song I like. We were having a laugh about the song, messing with the lyrics, I started singing the song, and he broke into the backing vocals... with a high-pitched voice that he doesn't really have. I agree with SA, it's the little things.


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## NobodySpecial

My husband is my favorite thing about my marriage.


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## brooklynAnn

Any other man and we would have been divorced by now. My husband is patient, kind, loving and with a wicked sense of humor. He always makes me laugh. He makes me feel safe and loved. When I am grumpy and pissed off, he always knows how to handle me. .  

He cleans the snow off the car for me and always fill it up with gas. He loves our kids. And everything I cook is his favorite. And he loves and act as if I am the most smart sexy thing ever.:smile2:


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## doobie

The most positive thing about my marriage is that it's over - I left a few weeks ago and have got my life back.


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## just got it 55

Married 37 years and getting better at it every day

Love my girl.

55


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## Faithful Wife

My H travels around a lot for his job, while I sit in the same office every day.

Every time he is near my office while out and about for his job, he will call or text me with "wanna smooch?" That means he is going to be pulling up in front of my office shortly. If I can get away from my desk (usually not a problem unless in a meeting), I run out the front door, hop in his truck, and make out with him for as much time as he can spare! Then its "thanks, baby" and back inside to my desk to finish out the day. I love when he does this.


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