# Husband supporting family overseas, might led to financial problems down the road.



## Eatcake (Feb 1, 2015)

There's nothing wrong with supporting family members outside the country and right now it's not really a concern. I just want to have some ideas to talk with him when things do become an issue and when they become overly dependent. Right now we each make around 40k, still at the age where we haven't start saving for retirements or putting away for big investments. Besides rent and bills to pay, the next biggest expense is the money sent to support his mom and teenage sister. Being their main support, because the other family members don't have much money, their living standard according to him is pretty good. But recently they made some impulsive purchases without telling my husband that was alarming. Like buying a new washing machine for $500 because the store clerk said the prices were going to double the next day. And recently the teenage sister decided to move out because mom was drinking, and mom just gave the rest of her money to pay for her rent. My husband said this is alarming but it shouldn't affect the usual ordeal. I am not as worried about it financially right now but I am worried about it perpetuating this idea that they can always rely on someone else, I mean mom couldn't work due to certain circumstances but she needs to make better financial judgement and try to find other backup plans in case we can't support them anymore. The sister we worry about because she doesn't understand the concept of responsibility, she do't mind spending money, and we're trying to keep her in school which she doesn't seem to care much about. Before, the ex-husband was supporting them, but things went downward after he left.


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## Mr.D.E.B.T. (Jul 19, 2012)

Have you asked him what him what his limits are? Maybe he isn't worried because he has a limit in mind. I suggest you share your feelings with him, but do your best to not come off in a confrontational manner.Some standards and expectations need to be set before this gets ugly.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Eatcake said:


> Being their main support, because the other family members don't have much money, their living standard according to him is pretty good.


What does this mean? If their living standard is pretty good, why does he need to help support them?

Have you explored with him things like what sorts of welfare are available where they live? Can the sister get any education paid for by the gov where she lives?

What % of your joint income is going to his family?


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## Yeswecan (Jul 25, 2014)

As stated. There needs to be a limit and end to the support. I understand it is family. Even so, they are not entitled. 

-If you lend money to a family member...consider it never coming back.
-Never conduct any business deals with family members.

Consider taking the sister in with you. Go to a school in your area. As for mom...well, she needs to get her act together. You are financing a drinking problem.


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