# New Days



## Shooboomafoo (Mar 30, 2011)

This past weekend I bought some Carolina Jasmine, and tacked a couple of wooden pallets to my fence, so the jasmine will grow over and thru the pallets, hopefully creating a wall of jasmine in my yard. This weekend, I DID grill that brisket, and it was awesome, had some friends over, had a good time. 
The better part of last week was holiday time for me, so I had three weekdays off, and the kid was at her moms.
I cant tell you how good it is to go at my own pace in life.
Reflection would propose that I spent most of the last ten years fulfilling the needs of a woman that grew to resent it! Hmmm! I find how different we were, just by noticing how refreshingly "un-busy" I am nowadays, I guess we mustve had different needs at different levels of priority! 
Saturday, my daughter slept til noon. I woke up around eight and made coffee. I sat outside on my own back porch, the morning dew still covering the grass that finally grows. I sat and listened to my own voice, that said "this" was awesome, and peaceful, and calm. My mind wasnt frazzled with things pending for the day of the highest and utmost importance!!!! I simply had, nothing to do, as was planned.
The simple questions of the moment, like "whats for breakfast", when it was lunchtime, THOSE are the important questions now.


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## Shooboomafoo (Mar 30, 2011)

I guess this is a weird, and off topic post. I wanted to mention the simple pleasure of having something "else" to occupy my thoughts. This too, might reach someone like myself who've spent a considerable amount of time wondering when they'd get to feel something else. I surely felt no hope at first.


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## ing (Mar 26, 2011)

My life appears to be at a slower pace too, even though I have a 17 year old grrrl in the house and i am rebuilding my business! 
I bought some nice rugs and have softened the house. No mink throw for the couch as yet though 
This has an interesting spin off in that people [read kids] take their shoes off as they walk in the door, cutting my cleaning time down. 
The yard is full of vegetables, even in winter which I graze for dinner. Saved me a fortune! The car gets used less and less, and when it does it gets used as a truck.

I listen to music as an activity on my awesome stereo. That was something that was seen as wasting time before and every moment where i wasn't doing something was resented.
Just letting the world slide by for a bit is great. 

My GF has helped in this. "You are allowed to do just what you want you know" 
She says this with a smile, because sometimes I get guilty about it for no reason and get agitated. 

Life is fine. 

My ExW is falling apart though. I am not happy about it but there is nothing I can really do for her. I did talk to her last week and told her that I forgave her. She seemed to find some comfort in that, but she has now realized who, and what she so easily discarded. I did try to save our marriage. I really did, but in the end you have to save yourself and your kids.


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## Shoeguy (Jun 23, 2011)

I love this topic. I've been thinking about it recently.

Just the other day I told my GF that I always get that feeling that I HAVE to be doing something all the time. I guess that i was molded into that over the past 20 years of marriage.

She said from her perspective I was one of the most active people she knew. She stated that I never just relax. I'm always going somewhere or doing something and never just "Veg out". I guess I don't understand that term but I should start learning it. Whenever I just try and watch TV for a little while I start thinking about how lazy I must be becasue there is something I could be doing. There are some minor home repsirs that should be done but I haven't completed. She said there is always something to do but you need to think about yourself more often. Maybe she is right.

Funny though becasue in the next topic was she was wondering if we were going to do something together this week. I guess it never ends. LOL

Take care,

Shoeguy


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