# Can men be attracted to a few women at the same time even if they are married??



## Moongazer (Aug 12, 2010)

Hi I am fairly new here and have a few questions for the guys out there.
Is it common/normal for men to be attracted to more than one woman sexually/physically, at the same time, even if they are married or in a relationship?

If they are, does it signify that the relationship at home is in trouble?

I have read that if men are attracted to more than one woman, they will have a favourite, is this true?, or will they actually prefer the one who gives them the most attention because it is easier?

Is it true what most women say, that a guy who is not happy at home will stray for the sexual side of things rather than emotional?

This is a general topic between myself and a few friends, and it would be great to have some ideas from the guys.:scratchhead:


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## BigBadWolf (Nov 30, 2009)

Moongazer said:


> Hi I am fairly new here and have a few questions for the guys out there.


Welcome to the forums.



> Is it common/normal for men to be attracted to more than one woman sexually/physically, at the same time, even if they are married or in a relationship?


I am just a few years from 40 years old, and have been happily married for almost 21 years to my beautiful and intelligent and sexy wife, and I bet I could count on one hand maybe the number of women I have not been attracted to ever in my life.

Since even before puberty, I have noticed and been fascinated and attracted to women and I hope to always be sexually and physically attracted to the women I have the privilege of noticing and seeing and meeting until the day I die.

This is not saying I am acting on this attraction, as I am firmly believing in the committment and stability and health and emotional and sexual satisfaction of monogamy, so the attraction and actiing on the attraction are very two different things.



> If they are, does it signify that the relationship at home is in trouble?


No.

Only to be dishonest will some man say he doesn't notice other women, and to be dishonest would any woman really want this from her man.

Far far far far better for the good man to notice beautiful women, and regard his woman at home as the most beautiful and desirable to him above all these other women, and for him to let her know he is regarding her above all these other women, than to pretend some less than honest scenario. 



> I have read that if men are attracted to more than one woman, they will have a favourite, is this true?, or will they actually prefer the one who gives them the most attention because it is easier?


This statement is full of half truths.

Sure a man will love attention, as would any human being man or woman.

But this is not less than one dimension of a very complicated structure we call relationships.

Myself, I would never say I want to find the woman that is easiest, what challenge and fun is that? ALways to raise suspicion if some woman is giving attention too easily, as if there is more to the story that needs to be checked into, so to say.

What is compatibility, to find a woman that is beautiful to behold, sure, but also a good compliment to the man. Not an exact match, but also not so much opposed in so many areas to be at odds with what the man is regarding as proper and important to pursue the tings in life he is desiring.

Surely something much much much deeper than just which woman is giving him the easiest attention. To think a good man is thinking in such a simplistic manner would be naive.



> Is it true what most women say, that a guy who is not happy at home will stray for the sexual side of things rather than emotional?


It is not true to assume the sexual side of things is not emotional, for to a man these are very much tied together.

When the man is not receiving sexual and physical contact from the woman he loves and is desiring, he will not be willing to be emotionally open with such a woman. 

The means that the man will know he is connected to his woman, and is in the relationship of trust and openness, is the physical contact between him and his woman.

When the sexual contact is frequent and welcome and flowing freely, there is emotional connection and trust in the relationship.



> This is a general topic between myself and a few friends, and it would be great to have some ideas from the guys.:scratchhead:


THis is good to ask these questions. I am hoping many men will take time to answer your questions and be sure I will be willing to answer any question in blunt honesty, as that is what I believe is the best way to learn in the matters. 

I hope this is helpful to you.


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## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

There was a time in my marriage when I didn't notice other women.

Retrospectively, it's a bad sign.

It means you have too much of your emotional health wrapped up in the interaction with your spouse.

You need to be direct and honest at home. Part of that is not becoming *****-whipped enough where you are constantly trying to avoid trouble. That leads to dishonesty and resentment - and actually puts you more at risk for acting out on the women you may happen to notice - or those who get aggressive with you.


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## AFEH (May 18, 2010)

Can men be attracted to a few women at the same time even if they are married??

Yup. It's called nature. Just depends what the man does when he feels attracted and knows the door is open.

Bob


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## michzz (Jun 6, 2008)

Both genders are attracted to multiple people most of their life--married or not.

ACTING on that attraction is what separates faithful spouses from cheaters.

It is not a gender-specific impulse, to be attracted to others while married.


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## F-102 (Sep 15, 2010)

No, there is no problem at home. Men are very visual creatures, and they will look if it's there. Don't believe me? You both could be driving the most reliable, economical car that he loves-now watch a beautiful antique '57 Chevy go by, betcha he drools!
It's like when he drools over certain celebs, it doesn't mean he's gonna dump you and head for Hollywood that minute. I know, I ogle certain celebs myself( one of the Desperate Housewives is my favorite), but after the visual show is over, I'm home with the woman I cherish. I always come home to her, not some fantasy of a celeb. (Incidentally, she has a thing for Antonio Banderas!)

I just go by the simple rule: Look all you want-just don't touch.


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