# your view of interracial marriage



## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

As the title mentioned, i'm just really interested your view on this small but a growing trend.

I'm a chinese had a LTR (later "married") to an australian wife. Really rare in accordance to statistics (only 2%!)(Interracial marriage - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia)

I notice that people were actually staring at us when we were holding hands or kissing and etc. That just give me the creeps on why people are still racially sensitive on racial-relationship. (not saying ****e to anyone but it gradually improves during the 7 years we were together)

One thing that makes people reluctant for a interracial relationships are parental pressure to marry to the same "race" or thinking that he/she should not deserve it and etc 

What do you think on interracial marriage and can it be maintained despite cultural differences? Also what are the other challenges in having a interracial relationship/marriage.

Just wanna here your views thanks


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## I'mInLoveWithMyHubby (Nov 7, 2011)

I personally see absolutely nothing wrong with it. 

A marriage should be with 2 people that love each other dearly regardless of religion or race.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

the liberal one said:


> As the title mentioned, i'm just really interested your view on *this small but a growing trend*.


It's not "small" or a growing "*trend*." Interracial marriages and relationships have been around since the beginning of time and will continue to be. 

I see nothing wrong with it. If two people want to be together, they should be.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

the liberal one said:


> What do you think on interracial marriage and *can it be maintained* despite cultural differences?


Any relationship can be maintained as long as the people in it commit to it and to stayin together.


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## ScarletBegonias (Jun 26, 2012)

the liberal one said:


> As the title mentioned, i'm just really interested your view on this small but a growing trend.
> 
> I'm a chinese had a LTR (later "married") to an australian wife. Really rare in accordance to statistics (only 2%!)(Interracial marriage - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia)
> 
> ...


I had no idea it was a small but growing trend.I thought we were mostly "mutts" 

I think since there's nothing wrong with interracial marriage.It's 2012 for heavens sake,we shouldn't even call it interracial marriage,it's just MARRIAGE. two people in love. that's it.color blind.I'd think people would iron out their cultural differences prior to agreeing on marriage.


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

Human beings are all equal. Race shouldn't matter. Unfortunately, people who don't feel this way often make an interracial marriage difficult--that being some family members, friends, and neighbors. I wouldn't have a problem with my children having interracial marriages. We already have an array of ethnicities and religions in the family. Everyone is very accepting and there are no problems.

Hope more people can become open-minded, so life will be easier on you, your wife, and others.


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## KathyBatesel (Apr 26, 2012)

I think people should stay out of other people's affairs when not invited. So many of the judgmental people out there are that way because they're unhappy in their own lives. 

As pointed out, interracial marriages are not uncommon. They have unique pressures, but race is very rarely the reason for those relationships to end. They end for the same reasons as same-race couples - disagreements over money, fidelity, control. 

They also succeed for the same reasons - shared respect and admiration, great compatibility, and generous helpings of love.


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## lilith23 (Sep 6, 2012)

I'm Asian and part occidental, and my husband is occidental. I have a multicultural background. I was born in an Asian country and moved to Europe for 13 years.

I don't see any problem if we can communicate and understand each other (speaking same languages), share similar interests and lifestyle, similar beliefs and so on. If we can understand and relate to each other, and there are no cultural restrictions (like religions and costumes), I don't see much problems. Our family is also open to it any ways. 

The only small problems are that he can't understand my native language and can get bored whenever we are spending time with my family, and there are also a few cultural stuffs I can't share with him.  Cultural jokes, childhood references, and so on... But they are just not serious anyways.


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## lilith23 (Sep 6, 2012)

The people who looks with judgmental eyes are revealing their own ignorance, of how they never seen much of the world but only lived in their own small world. I always keep that in mind whenever people look at me with weird eyes.

The good thing is, sometimes some people do look out of curiosity and not for being judgmental.


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## sinnister (Dec 5, 2010)

I'm in an interracial marriage. I am black and my wife is latina.

We get looks from all sides, but living in Canada I find it much less common to get the creepy stares.

Everytime I travel to the U.S. though the stairs are much more pronounced. I stopped at a fast food restaurant in upstate NY once and regretted it. Creepiest vibe from everybody their giving me the "you don't belong look".


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## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

Our marriage is an interracial one.
Never had any problems from people outside the marriage based on race.
In our country, interracial marriages are the cultural norm, because the determinant factor of status in our society is not race, but wealth. 

The head of State is a black man married to an East Indian woman.
The immediate past head of the Judiciary was a White Portugese man married to a black woman.
One of the most prominent ,wealthiest businessman in the entertainment business down here is Chinese. [ Lots of Chinese here too]. He owns recording studios , media houses etc. His wife is Black.
So Chinese, Black, Indian , Latin, White, everybody marry whomsoever they want, in the end its money that determines your status in our very affluent society.

So my answer to the question is yes. Two people of different ethnicity can get married and make it. However there is a big but.
If the society is one that does not frown on such marriages, it is much easier. They get invited to social functions where they meet other couples just like themselves . When they visit the supermarket, mall, church, nobody makes funny faces at them.

But if they live in a society that frowns on the practice, then it can be hard on them because they are made to feel like outcasts or aliens.

EDIT.
One of the fun things about the prevalence of interracial marriages down here, is that you cannot tell a person's race by their name.
So I might meet a client by phone and she gives her name as 
" Lee Anne Tsoi-a -fat " which sounds like Chinese 
[ Cantonese].Later ,when I meet Lee Ann , behold she is White or mixed. 
Her husband or father is Chinese.
Usually we will just have a good laugh!


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## Caro (Nov 11, 2012)

I was surprised to even see you asking about what people thought about interracial marriage! Of course there's nothing wrong with it - it's about love!

There are many places in the world where interracial marriage is hardly even thought of as "different" anymore. It sounds like you don't live in one of those places, which is really too bad. I can imagine the looks must be disturbing, and you might wonder if things could progress to more than just looks. But I can assure you that there are plenty of places where you'd be perfectly welcome.

Hang in there!

Caro


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## Coffee Amore (Dec 15, 2011)

I don't see what the big deal is. More and more people are in such marriages. It's not a small trend at all in my area. In fact, interracial marriages are so common where I live that people like me who grew up in a homogenous family are the minority. Interracial marriages a growing trend in my community. On my husband's side of the family, there are many interracial marriages between White and Asian mostly. The majority of my cousins are in interracial relationships. A few of them live in Australia, like you OP. So far I haven't heard them talk about problems from being in such marriages. They live in big cities like Sydney and Melbourne, but that's not to say they haven't experienced racial related problems either.


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## EnjoliWoman (Jul 2, 2012)

I'mInLoveWithMyHubby said:


> I personally see absolutely nothing wrong with it.
> 
> A marriage should be with 2 people that love each other dearly regardless of religion or race.


Or gender. 

Matters not to me what two people who love each other do.


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## Mrs Chai (Sep 14, 2010)

I'm married to a Taiwanese man. When we dated, it didn't seem like a lot people 'noticed' our difference in race (I'm Caucasian). However, when we announced our marriage it got a little more scrutiny. Perhaps its because he grew up in Taiwan and then moved here to become a citizen, I get a lot of "How is his being Chinese going to effect how you raise your kids?" Etc.

As for stares, I don't notice them. We live in a town with two major Universities next to each other so there's a large variety of ethnicity in the area. So I guess mixed couples are not as out of place compared to when we visit my smaller hometown or travel outside of college towns.


I find the challenge being married to a man who was raised in a different country and culture that we clash on opinions of the 'household.' I was raised by a father who went to work, a mother who stayed home and raised the kids, a very nuclear family. While his was not that much different, we run into things were I'll be like:

"Well the husband is SUPPOSED to do that." 

I'd say the most recent would be any dealings to our Landlord. Though we have separate bank accounts, we have a joint account for living expenses and in my house my father took care of those things. My issue is I assume my husband will do things that aren't exactly necessary for him to do (I could do them myself) but based on my background, I expect him to do them (paying bills, etc.)

We have fixed that issue (divvied up who was responsible for what bill) and now I voice "I would like you to do..." instead of just assuming he would take a role/position that I would expect him to take due to what I observed as a child with my father.

I don't know if that makes sense and its not the _best_ example of our differences, but I know we ran into them early in the marriage and had addressed them accordingly. If I can think of any others I'll be happy to share them later =)


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## heavensangel (Feb 12, 2012)

Doesn't bother me int he least. Honestly, in some areas where it's frowned upon, I admire those who go for it and do what they have to do to beat the odds. It shows true commitment to the one they love! 

When H and I first met, we were out a local pub, and a co-worker of mine actually attacked him, calling him an F'ing Puerto Rican and what the [email protected] did he think he was doing with a white woman. A bouncer had to finally throw her out. Yes, H does look like he could have Native American and/or Mexican/Puerto Rican heritage, but he doesn't. His father's traced their lineage back to the mid 1700s; not a lick of any heritage other than white. When out & about, we occasionally get some strange glances our way and I often wonder if they're thinking the same way my co-worker did but you know........ it really wouldn't/doesn't matter to me where he's from, he's still CAPTURED MY HEART!!!!!!!


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

Love is Courage. Be Brave.


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

827Aug said:


> Hope more people can become open-minded, so life will be easier on you, your wife, and others.


thanks, thanks to multiculturalism over the last decade the creepy stares and shocks by the pedestrians actually lessen. Also both of our parents are quite open-minded about our relationship (heck my dad is actually one of her dad's good friend at work years ago)

but i know there are some couples who are still currently struggling, hope they can stand the test of time



Caribbean Man said:


> EDIT.
> One of the fun things about the prevalence of interracial marriages down here, is that you cannot tell a person's race by their name.
> So I might meet a client by phone and she gives her name as
> " Lee Anne Tsoi-a -fat " which sounds like Chinese
> ...


Whoa well Cantonese was actually my mother tongue (but after being in australia for 2 decades i actually let english as my mother tongue)



Coffee Amore said:


> I don't see what the big deal is. More and more people are in such marriages. It's not a small trend at all in my area. In fact, interracial marriages are so common where I live that people like me who grew up in a homogenous family are the minority. Interracial marriages a growing trend in my community. On my husband's side of the family, there are many interracial marriages between White and Asian mostly. The majority of my cousins are in interracial relationships. A few of them live in Australia, like you OP. So far I haven't heard them talk about problems from being in such marriages. They live in big cities like Sydney and Melbourne, but that's not to say they haven't experienced racial related problems either.


i lived in Melbourne the most socially liberal place in Australia so racial issues is actually minimal there and also interracial relationships always happens in big cities (i kinda notice that)



Runs like Dog said:


> Love is Courage. Be Brave.


great advice thanks



Caro said:


> There are many places in the world where interracial marriage is hardly even thought of as "different" anymore. It sounds like you don't live in one of those places, which is really too bad. I can imagine the looks must be disturbing, and you might wonder if things could progress to more than just looks. But I can assure you that there are plenty of places where you'd be perfectly welcome.
> 
> Hang in there!
> 
> Caro


errrr not i m actually not struggling, i only post this is just for you TAM guys/girls to put their opinions and their experience in this thread

thanks anyway the creeps had decline dramatically over the last decade anyway (quite an achievement from being of the racist to one of the most multicultural within four decades must be education i guess :lol


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

the liberal one said:


> As the title mentioned, i'm just really interested your view on this small but a growing trend.
> 
> I'm a chinese had a LTR (later "married") to an australian wife. Really rare in accordance to statistics (only 2%!)(Interracial marriage - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia)


I'm Asian as well and my STBX is a blonde, but we were both born Australians and my wife isn't exactly "white", she's a "mutt", but sure as hell doesn't look like one. We've married for 4 years.



> I notice that people were actually staring at us when we were holding hands or kissing and etc. That just give me the creeps on why people are still racially sensitive on racial-relationship. (not saying ****e to anyone but it gradually improves during the 7 years we were together)


For 3 years of my marriage I've rejected public affection due to this in addition to "White Australia"/"One Nation" groups and rumors of local gangs. We also live in ******* central. But I've noticed the more multi-cultural an area is, the less racially sensitive they are. My wife and I also used to be exhibitionist in the city, it triggers much less insecurity amongst the majority when the majority are already 'used to it'. More majority-centric areas however, you can't really expect much, and many complain that Sydney is now full of "----s" etc etc.



> One thing that makes people reluctant for a interracial relationships are parental pressure to marry to the same "race" or thinking that he/she should not deserve it and etc


I had more then parental pressures, unlike your people, my people don't have the luxury of a large population. We've been genocided twice and many of us have scattered across the world trying to escape poverty in our motherland. Intermixing is considered betraying our own race to self-genocide, and they are right, we can't afford to intermix. And we don't consider other Asians part of our race due to our unique culture and genes.

I'm guessing you can figure out my ancestry by now, my people have always had problems with yours! Your ancestors even built a huge freakin wall to keep us out lol



> What do you think on interracial marriage and can it be maintained despite cultural differences? Also what are the other challenges in having a interracial relationship/marriage.
> 
> Just wanna here your views thanks


You can ask me all you like, I've lived it all my life, my first was European, second was Aboriginal, third Irish, before I even had experiences with "women of my own race" who are Asian. I've always been given sh-t for my second girlfriend though, the majority in Australia are still very ignorant but not all are exactly racist. It just takes time for folk to adjust.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Runs like Dog said:


> Love is Courage. Be Brave.


Oh mate, it ain't always as easy as that. As a husband you have to take responsibility for the safety of your family. Alone I don't care, but when you're walking down the street with your wife and child and bogans drive by throwing beer bottles at you - you tend to realise it's best to keep a low profile.

Not to mention it's not about courage most of the time, it's restraint. I already have a criminal record and one more assault could land my ass back in jail. The courts favor the "victim" as always.



> thanks anyway the creeps had decline dramatically over the last decade anyway (quite an achievement from being of the racist to one of the most multicultural within four decades must be education i guess


Yes it has changed, and it's getting better and better. My daughter can be proud of four ancestries, and I'm glad that new generations are much better than the old.


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## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

the liberal one said:


> Whoa well Cantonese was actually my mother tongue (but after being in australia for 2 decades i actually let english as my mother tongue)


Well I didn't realize that you lived in Australia for so long.
One of my close relatives [ Female ] is married [ interracial marriage also, he's white , she's black.] to an Australian!

He's a research scientist or something like that . She's a Food Chemist.
They met when his company sent him down here on a research project. She worked at the one of the Universities in the department he had to work with. The minute they met , sparks flew.
At the end of the project, he returned to Australia, quit his job and came back here to marry her.
They finally migrated back to Australia, where the have their own business.

Funny thing is this sort of things happens all the time. A lot of expats meet locals, get married and stay here.
Maybe its something in the sea , pina coladas, or rum & coca cola.......


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## ladybird (Jun 16, 2010)

I personally see nothing wrong with it. It is not one else's business anyway =).

I feel the same about same sex relationships.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

> What do you think on interracial marriage and can it be maintained despite cultural differences? Also what are the other challenges in having a interracial relationship/marriage.


Also another thing, so you won't make the same mistake I did. For the first 2 years of our 7 yr relationship with my wife and I, we've been focused on external issues; race and religion the two biggest ones especially when we had no support from either of our families.

We've neglected the internal issues of our marriage, especially boundaries. That was our biggest mistake. What I've learnt from all this is that intermixing can bring you a whole lot of problems, but marriage itself - brings a whole lot of problems by itself. It doesn't matter whether one is black, pink, yellow, orange, white, red, purple, blue -> in the end, it's still about two people trying to make it work.

It's easy to forget the internal issues when you have external issues in your face yes, but unfortunately, that's why it's hard.


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

I don't care if you marry a space alien. Cut your grass, make your kids behave, drive like you have some sense, stay out of my business, clean up your dog's poop if it goes in public or in my yard, get a job, and pay your taxes.


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

RandomDude said:


> I'm Asian as well and my STBX is a blonde, but we were both born Australians and my wife isn't exactly "white", she's a "mutt", but sure as hell doesn't look like one. We've married for 4 years.


oh randomdude i didn't notice that you are an asian.... well sorry for your situation i hope you will have a admirable divorce or even a R with her......



RandomDude said:


> For 3 years of my marriage I've rejected public affection due to this in addition to "White Australia"/"One Nation" groups and rumors of local gangs. We also live in ******* central.


which part of australia do you live? (my best guess is in the middle of Queensland those people are as bad as American ********)



RandomDude said:


> But I've noticed the more multi-cultural an area is, the less racially sensitive they are. My wife and I also used to be exhibitionist in the city, it triggers much less insecurity amongst the majority when the majority are already 'used to it'. More majority-centric areas however, you can't really expect much, and many complain that Sydney is now full of "----s" etc etc.


thats quite a norm, large urban centers breeds multiculturalism easily as migrants tend to live there. Oh btw Sydney is full of crap anyway (expensive house prices/rent, worse public transport, traffic jam, ******* suburbs in the west or far south, incompetent state government, etc)

source: i lived in Sydney before and absolutely hate it! that place is like the "shame" of Australia DO NOT LIVE THERE! 



RandomDude said:


> I had more then parental pressures, unlike your people, my people don't have the luxury of a large population. We've been genocided twice and many of us have scattered across the world trying to escape poverty in our motherland. Intermixing is considered betraying our own race to self-genocide, and they are right, we can't afford to intermix. And we don't consider other Asians part of our race due to our unique culture and genes.


errr that sounds like your parents had advocated the "pure" race theory like intermixing is considered betraying your own race!? WTF? you guys are even more racially sensitive than the ********.... (since you don't even consider other parts of Asians!) If you are white and saying this, you are so going to be in a big trouble



RandomDude said:


> I'm guessing you can figure out my ancestry by now, my people have always had problems with yours! Your ancestors even built a huge freakin wall to keep us out lol


Not really, i m as clueless as anyone else in this forum let me give my best guess (Tibetan? since i hear the word genocide) pls gimmie the answer by PM if you don't want to post it in this thread (i m quite interested in your racial background right now) 



RandomDude said:


> You can ask me all you like, I've lived it all my life, my first was European, second was Aboriginal, third Irish, before I even had experiences with "women of my own race" who are Asian.


well i had asked a few questions above and now let me share my list of my bf/gf (i m bi-sexual btw mentioned in my profile)

First: my best (male Caucasian) friend (small taste to homosexuality)

Second: my old classmate in uni (female Italian) but broke up because her parents are pure d-bags

Thrid: my superior's friend (Male Caucasian), worse relstionship ever since he actually has 3 kids and a wife.

Forth: my current wife (female Caucasian) initially a co-worker and friend

notice that all my relationships does not contain any "asian" in it mostly because when i talked to them about dirty jokes, they feel offended and sometimes they just don't understand it. (it makes me feel that i had a cultural difference between me and other chinese people)



RandomDude said:


> I've always been given sh-t for my second girlfriend though, the majority in Australia are still very ignorant but not all are exactly racist. It just takes time for folk to adjust.


well the problem with most australians (as well as westerners i know of) is that they are not ignorant but they are not "street smart" enough like most "asians" do. they don't seem to know how to handle conflicts between co-workers if a problem arose and don't know how to appeal to a bad supervisor (mostly to the fact that they are lacking of empathy towards others and failed to considered others because of their individualism)

heck onetime when my wife praise me for my street smart and my empathy, my mum says that i m just 20% as good as my dad. (that makes me living in a cultural limbo between australian and chinese)

ahhh well


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

RandomDude said:


> Also another thing, so you won't make the same mistake I did. For the first 2 years of our 7 yr relationship with my wife and I, we've been focused on external issues; race and religion the two biggest ones especially when we had no support from either of our families.
> 
> We've neglected the internal issues of our marriage, especially boundaries. That was our biggest mistake. What I've learnt from all this is that intermixing can bring you a whole lot of problems, but marriage itself - brings a whole lot of problems by itself. It doesn't matter whether one is black, pink, yellow, orange, white, red, purple, blue -> in the end, it's still about two people trying to make it work.
> 
> It's easy to forget the internal issues when you have external issues in your face yes, but unfortunately, that's why it's hard.


i'm sorry for your situation, living in ******* central queensland (assuming), un-supportive families, religious problems. No wonder your marriage failed that badly since you failed to address the internal problems. Intermixing brings lots of problems!? i m not sure about that

well for me the situation is opposite to your situation, my W and i had lived in Melbourne (most socially liberal place), supportive families that wants us to be happy with each other (partly because my dad is her dad's friend but thats another story), both of us are atheist as well as both of our parents. Our "external" problems are non-existent except people gives me creepy stares in the streets at times. Thus we can focus on handling our internal boundaries. 

Sorry about your situation again btw, this marriage should be a model one since both of you had gone that far and should meant to have a happy ending ......... (it hurt me to see how those relationships ends like this after overcoming social norms and obstacles)


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

I'm a white girl. My husband is 1st generation Salvadoran.

I prefer brown men. Can't help it.


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

Caribbean Man said:


> Well I didn't realize that you lived in Australia for so long.


thanks i'm actually a generation of hongkonger migrants to Australia (hence Chinese) after the Tienanmen massacre in 1989 fearing that hongkong will have lots of massacres if the city returned to the communist from the brits



Caribbean Man said:


> At the end of the project, he returned to Australia, quit his job and came back here to marry her.
> They finally migrated back to Australia, where the have their own business.


well that sounds economically irrational, Australia had much higher wages than the Caribbean regions good thing they move back afterwards knowing that they make much less money there



Caribbean Man said:


> Funny thing is this sort of things happens all the time. A lot of expats meet locals, get married and stay here.
> Maybe its something in the sea , pina coladas, or rum & coca cola.......


love conquers all i guess


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

the liberal one said:


> oh randomdude i didn't notice that you are an asian.... well sorry for your situation i hope you will have a admirable divorce or even a R with her......


Meh, I'm sure we'll be fine. To be honest I'm actually glad we're on the same side again even though we're on the same side to end our marriage. I'm THAT tired of the BS in our marriage, I just can't be fked fighting with her anymore



> which part of australia do you live? (my best guess is in the middle of Queensland those people are as bad as American ********)thats quite a norm, large urban centers breeds multiculturalism easily as migrants tend to live there. Oh btw Sydney is full of crap anyway (expensive house prices/rent, worse public transport, traffic jam, ******* suburbs in the west or far south, incompetent state government, etc)
> source: i lived in Sydney before and absolutely hate it! that place is like the "shame" of Australia DO NOT LIVE THERE!


Erm, my wife and I ARE sydney dwellers. 

Darn it, state supremism!!! In a thread where we are discussing interracial marriages :rofl:
Damn you melbourners, or "mexicans" (hehe) 
Or whichever state you're from lol



> Not really, i m as clueless as anyone else in this forum let me give my best guess (Tibetan? since i hear the word genocide) pls gimmie the answer by PM if you don't want to post it in this thread (i m quite interested in your racial background right now)


Erm, hint hint... big wall, China, why was the big wall built?
You MUST know your history come on!



> errr that sounds like your parents had advocated the "pure" race theory like intermixing is considered betraying your own race!? WTF? you guys are even more racially sensitive than the ********.... (since you don't even consider other parts of Asians!) If you are white and saying this, you are so going to be in a big trouble


The thing is, our people are not traditionally like this. We are now due to the fact that we WEREN'T traditionally like this. Our people and people related to us had the whole world in our hands once for a full century. We conquered but we have never imposed our language, our culture, or our way of life. That's something most historians miss unfortunately, and continue to call us "barbarians". Our problem is that our people never bothered to write, so everyone else wrote our history for us - including you guys lol

Due to the conquests though, there goes a saying "conquer a woman, and two generations down the track, the woman conquers you". And THAT's what happened for many of us. Now not only that, but with two genocides and our culture dying, we have no choice but to protective of our culture. It's bad, I know, and it's really sad.

As for not considering ourselves part of East-Asian culture, we can't - our culture is too different, same with the West, our culture is based on nomadism, our philosophies were born from the steppe. We were not sedentary. Also, the thing is my people have lived through a completely different viewpoint then the current western world as well. The racialism system we had based on ethnic groups no matter how diverse is very different to the racialist system today; the modern "Asian", "White", "Black" categories. We were part of communism once, all four major groups of our modern day people.



> well i had asked a few questions above and now let me share my list of my bf/gf (i m bi-sexual btw mentioned in my profile)
> First: my best (male Caucasian) friend (small taste to homosexuality)
> Second: my old classmate in uni (female Italian) but broke up because her parents are pure d-bags
> Thrid: my superior's friend (Male Caucasian), worse relstionship ever since he actually has 3 kids and a wife.
> ...


That will happen, I was born here in Australia and no matter how proud I am of my own family culture, the Aussie way of life does rub off on ya. I don't get along with my people either most of the time, and they wanted me to marry one... pffft



> well the problem with most australians (as well as westerners i know of) is that they are not ignorant but they are not "street smart" enough like most "asians" do. they don't seem to know how to handle conflicts between co-workers if a problem arose and don't know how to appeal to a bad supervisor (mostly to the fact that they are lacking of empathy towards others and failed to considered others because of their individualism)
> 
> heck onetime when my wife praise me for my street smart and my empathy, my mum says that i m just 20% as good as my dad. (that makes me living in a cultural limbo between australian and chinese)
> 
> ahhh well


Well, I don't know if I can generalise the westerners like that. But heh, that's just me. I'm pretty much them as well having grew into their culture.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

I should also say that I'm in Los Angeles, CA and nobody really cares which color you are married to.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

the liberal one said:


> No wonder your marriage failed that badly since you failed to address the internal problems. Intermixing brings lots of problems!? i m not sure about that


Yeah but I don't blame the world, I've done this, we've done this, and my point is - it's never ever to do with race. In fact, the funny thing is that the racialism/taboo ironically actually brought us together in some ways.



> well for me the situation is opposite to your situation, my W and i had lived in Melbourne (most socially liberal place), supportive families that wants us to be happy with each other (partly because my dad is her dad's friend but thats another story), both of us are atheist as well as both of our parents. Our "external" problems are non-existent except people gives me creepy stares in the streets at times. Thus we can focus on handling our internal boundaries.


You're lucky mate, I'm sure you'll be fine.



> Sorry about your situation again btw, this marriage should be a model one since both of you had gone that far and should meant to have a happy ending ......... (it hurt me to see how those relationships ends like this after overcoming social norms and obstacles)


Yeah well, don't rub it in. We're just two human beings in the end.


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

RandomDude said:


> Meh, I'm sure we'll be fine. To be honest I'm actually glad we're on the same side again even though we're on the same side to end our marriage. I'm THAT tired of the BS in our marriage, I just can't be fked fighting with her anymore


hope your daughter will get use to it while you and your wife will become co-parent on good terms...



RandomDude said:


> Erm, my wife and I ARE sydney dwellers.
> 
> Darn it, state supremism!!! In a thread where we are discussing interracial marriages :rofl:
> Damn you melbourners, or "mexicans" (hehe)
> Or whichever state you're from lol


well that gives me another reason why Sydney is the worse city in Australia and yeah we Melbourneian/Victorians are more superior than you MUAHAHAHAAHAH



RandomDude said:


> , hint hint... big wall, China, why was the big wall built?
> You MUST know your history come on!


i m bad at history sorry mate (MONGOLIAN YAY)



RandomDude said:


> That will happen, I was born here in Australia and no matter how proud I am of my own family culture, the Aussie way of life does rub off on ya. I don't get along with my people either most of the time, and they wanted me to marry one... pffft


yeah i got some experiences too since some of my asian friends just have a surprise blind date to another asian women (she's hot btw but really lack of humor as well as acceptance of my dark racial jokes)



RandomDude said:


> Well, I don't know if I can generalise the westerners like that. But heh, that's just me. I'm pretty much them as well having grew into their culture.


i know but thats what i had observe after living here for decades! ahh well


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## Michie (Aug 26, 2012)

Is it a small trend, my parents didn't see it as a trend in 1980.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

RandomDude said:


> You're lucky mate, I'm sure you'll be fine.
> 
> Yeah well, don't rub it in. We're just two human beings in the end.


Thanks people says that our relationship is the most successful yet as we are still running (and even become swingers more details are in here http://talkaboutmarriage.com/sex-marriage/58606-threesomes-so-fourth-13.html#post1206658)

yeah its all down to being 2 human beings


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

the liberal one said:


> hope your daughter will get use to it while you and your wife will become co-parent on good terms...


From looks of things so far, I'm sure we'll be fine. We're calmer now, and getting things done.



> well that gives me another reason why Sydney is the worse city in Australia and yeah we Melbourneian/Victorians are more superior than you MUAHAHAHAAHAH


Oh yeah? Read below 



> i m bad at history sorry mate (MONGOLIAN YAY)


Close 
But that will do I guess heh



> yeah i got some experiences too since some of my asian friends just have a surprise blind date to another asian women (she's hot btw but really lack of humor as well as acceptance of my dark racial jokes)


A lot of Asian women IN Australia now due to cultural influences do have the same personality as your standard Australian girl I found. My wife just struck me as the best fit when it comes to personality however... once upon a time, and that was that. Racial preferences out the window.



> i know but thats what i had observe after living here for decades! ahh well


You'll start to see patterns sure, but maybe that's why we SYDNEY DWELLERS ARE MORE SUPERIOR  lol



the liberal one said:


> Thanks people says that our relationship is the most successful yet as we are still running (and even become swingers more details are in here http://talkaboutmarriage.com/sex-marriage/58606-threesomes-so-fourth-13.html#post1206658)
> 
> yeah its all down to being 2 human beings


Erm, don't do that. I've been there too with one of my ex gfs in the past all those years ago. It was fun, but if you value your respect for your wife, don't do it. Unless your relationship is at the strongest point possible do you even think about risking it.


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

that_girl said:


> I'm a white girl. My husband is 1st generation Salvadoran.
> 
> I prefer brown men. Can't help it.


interestingly there are white girls want to dig asians for what i can hear... 



that_girl said:


> I should also say that I'm in Los Angeles, CA and nobody really cares which color you are married to.


yeah i heard that in CA only 40% are actually white (or 70% if white south Americans included). That place seems to be more multicultural than Australia we don't determine by race in our census since its too racist but we determine our level of cultural-integration by country of birth (which means that there are 30% out of 22 million people are born overseas)

no wonder the republicans were flushed into the toilet in CA, you Americans need to have a multi-party democracy with lots of moderate parties, it seems that CA its rule by a one party state (democrats since they are the only choice and they are not as open-minded as our nation's conservatives especially on universal healthcare)

rant over NEXT POST


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

RandomDude said:


> From looks of things so far, I'm sure we'll be fine. We're calmer now, and getting things done.


really glad to see this, since lots of divorces really ***s up lots of people involved as both spouse involves in mutually assured destruction.



RandomDude said:


> Close
> But that will do I guess heh


Manchurian then COMEON GIMMIE THE ANSWER via Pm if you are shy about it (damit i want to know it)



RandomDude said:


> A lot of Asian women IN Australia now due to cultural influences do have the same personality as your standard Australian girl I found. My wife just struck me as the best fit when it comes to personality however... once upon a time, and that was that. Racial preferences out the window.


Well sadly i havn't met asian women who live in australia for a long while...... so sorry for my generalization



RandomDude said:


> You'll start to see patterns sure, but maybe that's why we SYDNEY DWELLERS ARE MORE SUPERIOR  lol


you really need to move surburbs or interstate, that place gonna blow anyway and no Sydney dwellers are inferior than our Melbourne dwellers



RandomDude said:


> Erm, don't do that. I've been there too with one of my ex gfs in the past all those years ago. It was fun, but if you value your respect for your wife, don't do it. Unless your relationship is at the strongest point possible do you even think about risking it.


did you read the post that i have linked? in detail? we are actually have are "alternative swingers" and we paid people to do it. btw we have been doing it for 2 years, our bond are strengthen more than ever (our cultural differences as well as swinging)


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

the liberal one said:


> really glad to see this, since lots of divorces really ***s up lots of people involved as both spouse involves in mutually assured destruction.
> 
> Manchurian then COMEON GIMMIE THE ANSWER via Pm if you are shy about it (damit i want to know it)


The answer is a long freakin history lesson and it's not really important. But we are part of the greater Mongol people yes.



> you really need to move surburbs or interstate, that place gonna blow anyway and no Sydney dwellers are inferior than our Melbourne dwellers
> 
> Well sadly i havn't met asian women who live in australia for a long while...... so sorry for my generalization


Plenty in Sydney, PLENTY 



> did you read the post that i have linked? in detail? we are actually have are "alternative swingers" and we paid people to do it. btw we have been doing it for 2 years, our bond are strengthen more than ever (our cultural differences as well as swinging)


Sorry, I missed it, I kinda just assumed, shuffling between threads at present lol. Well, I guess you two have found an arrangement that works for you, and you're lucky to have a relationship that strong. It's something I doubt I would do in the future however.


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

In general, people don't have problems with interracial marriages as long as it's not their children. The sad part is that some parents think they have rights over their children's marriage, if they don't like the person their son or daughter chooses, they make it difficult for the young couple's relationship to survive. I understand that the parents are more experienced and they think their young and inexperienced children may make mistakes and suffer from it. But I think parents should stay out of their children's business. If they make mistakes, let them learn from it. Don't you live their life and make every decision for them. The most you can do is to give advice. 

I am from China and my husband is from Canada. We are both independent from our parents, so we got married happily without any difficulties. We bring the good quality of our own culture to our marriage. I am good with money, and that's what my husband lacked. Chinese are good at saving, westerners are good at spending. So we make up for each other. My husband is good and liberal in bed and that's what I love. I don't like Chinese men, they are boring in bed. Whatever, I always think that western and eastern culture should combine and take the good from each side.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

> I don't like Chinese men, they are boring in bed.


I'm not so sure if OP is going to like that... :rofl:
And I sure as hell doubt he's boring considering what he does!


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

RandomDude said:


> I'm not so sure if OP is going to like that... :rofl:
> And I sure as hell doubt he's boring considering what he does!


I am sure OP won't mind it. 

I don't want to test out a lot of men just to look for the exception.


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

greenpearl said:


> In general, people don't have problems with interracial marriages as long as it's not their children. The sad part is that some parents think they have rights over their children's marriage, if they don't like the person their son or daughter chooses, they make it difficult for the young couple's relationship to survive. I understand that the parents are more experienced and they think their young and inexperienced children may make mistakes and suffer from it. But I think parents should stay out of their children's business. If they make mistakes, let them learn from it. Don't you live their life and make every decision for them. The most you can do is to give advice.


HAAHAH not all parents are d-bags mine isn't because they are more educated than the other chinese at the time (and yeah we come from Hongkong so there is a different conception to relationships as well)



greenpearl said:


> I am from China and my husband is from Canada. We are both independent from our parents, so we got married happily without any difficulties. We bring the good quality of our own culture to our marriage. I am good with money, and that's what my husband lacked.


well that sounds like my current situation the difference is that me and my wife are savers (not all westerners are spenders)



greenpearl said:


> My husband is good and liberal in bed and that's what I love. I don't like Chinese men, they are boring in bed.


As OP i found this very offensive to all chinese your ex-husband may be prude. But me and my wife had great sexual adventures of our own (oh yeah we are swingers we had threesomes "mostly"). Are you trying to bring out the classic conflict between hongkongers and mainlanders (its the big issue now days) :lol:



greenpearl said:


> Whatever, I always think that western and eastern culture should combine and take the good from each side.


i don't really think about that, thanks for the input:smthumbup:


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

RandomDude said:


> I'm not so sure if OP is going to like that... :rofl:
> And I sure as hell doubt he's boring considering what he does!


yeah my and my W are planning to have a short trip to the brothel tonight for some adult fun



greenpearl said:


> I am sure OP won't mind it.
> 
> I don't want to test out a lot of men just to look for the exception.


well you are not as sexually adventurous as i do then you and your H are too prude for me i m so sorry about that unless you are really into partner swapping and threesomes


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Why ranting on CA? Dang.

I'm just being me. Holy crap. And i married a Latino. And it's awesome. He's hot.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Actually, that's an interesting thing to explore. Racial stereotypes and past bad experiences. I'm guilty of that too, I had thought type a women were all hairy, and another type b women were all dead fish, and type c I swear need a new sense of smell altogether. :rofl: All based on ONE experience each lol


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## sinnister (Dec 5, 2010)

that_girl said:


> I should also say that I'm in Los Angeles, CA and nobody really cares which color you are married to.


I could see that in L.A....plus you are the female. Move that to another CA community and reverse the gender and there may be some issues.


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

that_girl said:


> Why ranting on CA? Dang.
> 
> I'm just being me. Holy crap. And i married a Latino. And it's awesome. He's hot.


sorry i had to rant about america after i read this

America

jeeze the health system is a pure mess



RandomDude said:


> Actually, that's an interesting thing to explore. Racial stereotypes and past bad experiences. I'm guilty of that too, I had thought type a women were all hairy, and another type b women were all dead fish, and type c I swear need a new sense of smell altogether. :rofl: All based on ONE experience each lol


OMG i had the same situation! HAAHAH


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Really? I never notice people and who they are married to. Only if one is super hot and the other is not. lol. That always makes me giggle a bit and wonder. But good for them!

I love America. So....whatever to you.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Oh hey! My stepdad was white (passed 2 years ago) and his wife (after my mom) is Salvadoran. No one cared and they live in Dana Point (my hometown). 

Heh. Maybe we just don't care so we assume others don't. I'm just glad to live somewhere where most people don't give a crap.


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

the liberal one said:


> HAAHAH not all parents are d-bags mine isn't because they are more educated than the other chinese at the time (and yeah we come from Hongkong so there is a different conception to relationships as well)
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Hi, you are not real Chinese. You are from Hong Kong. Hong Kong had been influenced by England, so people there are more liberal. 

Actually I don't agree with your lifestyle. What I mean good in bed doesn't mean threesome or swingers. I mean the man I love knows how to explore my body and feeling to help me achieve wonderful orgasms. I am not into threesome or swingers. I am a selfish and jealous woman. 

I don't judge you for doing what you like.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

> Hi, you are not real Chinese. You are from Hong Kong. Hong Kong had been influenced by England, so people there are more liberal.


Here comes the mainlanders VS HK debate!!! :rofl:
*Grabs popcorn*

Reminds me of my own people really, we can never ever agree to anything heh. Funny really, especially when I've noticed all Chinese no matter where they are from, all call themselves... well... Chinese lol

I wish my people have that, it's a strong sense of culture and identity. Even as conquers in history my people were more of a bunch of extremely dangerous armed immigrants than anything else, we always found different cultures... interesting.


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

greenpearl said:


> Hi, you are not real Chinese. You are from Hong Kong. Hong Kong had been influenced by England, so people there are more liberal.


yeah.... but i just get used to it since everyone calls me a chinese :lol: but in hongkong according to the speech by Hu himself he stated that HKers = Chinese and all HKers should be proud to be a patriotic chinese (it spark public internet outrage in HK within 2 hours)



greenpearl said:


> Actually I don't agree with your lifestyle. What I mean good in bed doesn't mean threesome or swingers. I mean the man I love knows how to explore my body and feeling to help me achieve wonderful orgasms. I am not into threesome or swingers. I am a selfish and jealous woman.
> 
> I don't judge you for doing what you like.


just sayin....... i mean the more sex you have the more experience you are, maybe my definition of good in bed means having lots of kinky ideas in "bed" you meaning of good in bed for me means are you "experience" in bed

i know that 'lifestyle" choice is not suitable for everyone and its even rare that there is a Chinese swinger. Our "lifestyle" choice base on the fact the sex can separate from love and we want to share our sexual experience and fantasy to others and have some naughty fun:smthumbup:


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Ya'll should watch "Becoming Human" on netflix. There's another documentary about becoming human as well.

You'd be surprised who are really "your people" after watching that. We're all one. It was very interesting. Migration of humans from beginning of time took some awesome turns and it's a good watch.


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

RandomDude said:


> Here comes the mainlanders VS HK debate!!! :rofl:
> *Grabs popcorn*
> 
> Reminds me of my own people really, we can never ever agree to anything heh. Funny really, especially when I've noticed all Chinese no matter where they are from, all call themselves... well... Chinese lol


yeah but first you had to deal with your stbxw and your daughter and seriously whats your ethnicity? i m so damn confused gimmie the answer damit


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

The Human Family Tree | Watch Free Documentary Online


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

> Ya'll should watch "Becoming Human" on netflix. There's another documentary about becoming human as well.
> 
> You'd be surprised who are really "your people" after watching that. We're all one. It was very interesting. Migration of humans from beginning of time took some awesome turns and it's a good watch.


The thing is too... I can actually see the opposing side of it. Culture and identity plays a part. I can't say I can completely agree with the "neo-nazis" of my own people who are against inter-marriage considering they gave me hell all those years ago for marrying my wife - more than any ******* on the street...

But I have seen what inter-marriage has done to us as well. Our people end up slowly disappearing, especially with our multi-cultural nature to begin with. For cultures with large populations, I can't see why not when it comes to inter-marriage, but for cultures with endangered populations, I can see the need for self-preservation. This is a very difficult subject but it's something I've always had to deal with in the past.

It's nothing to do with genes or superiority or whatever, it's simple cultural self-preservation.


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## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

Where I live I don't think its a big deal (and it is pretty ******* in these parts). I was dating a persian and she had heavy features, when we were in public (much less often than when we were in private  ) I was a little conscious of how others would perceive us, but no one really batted an eye. She however was a little more self-conscious than I was, but I'm beginning to think its because there is a lot more to her story (but that's history).


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## Pandakiss (Oct 29, 2010)

My grandmother is full german my dad is black. I look black, mostly. My husband is black. My mom is German and white. My great grandfather is from NC. 

Every body is shocked to see my mom. My hubby and I grew up in the same community and went to the same school. 

I don't usually tell people I'm white. I have been on both sides of hatred. The we don't like you because you're black and we don't like you because you're white. 

His mother didn't like me because I am white. Sorry I mean dosent. My grandmother didn't like my dad because he was black. Later I told her she can't hate him because he's black because I'm black. He has so many other qualities to hate him for....being a dead beat dad is a good one. 

She agreed but still chose to hate other black people and creeds.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

the liberal one said:


> yeah but first you had to deal with your stbxw and your daughter and seriously whats your ethnicity? i m so damn confused gimmie the answer damit


I really can't be bothered with the history lesson, but I've PMed you with a link where you can read all about my people, might take you a while though, including what happened - the genocide, and why I also see the "other side" of anti-intermixing


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## MEM2020 (Aug 23, 2009)

My sister married an American of Asian descent.

I will start with the bad news and end on a good note. The only drawback to this fellow is that his parents discriminate against my sister on the basis of religion.

We all liked my own brother in law from the start and we also had a very real 'future' bias which was that eurasian kids are typically very attractive. 

Then of course it turns out their kids are also scary smart - yes they are every bit as attractive as we expected. 

The other thing is that he treats my sister very well and has from the get go.


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## Ikaika (Apr 23, 2012)

Move to Hawaii... Nothing but interracial marriages. In fact it is rare other than among military to see people of the same race or ethnic group married to each other.


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## Sameold (Aug 11, 2011)

We are black and white and honestly don't see much beyond a raised eyebrow or two when we're together, which might be as much to do with the fact that I look ten years younger than I am and he looks that much older than he is.
But when I'm out with the kids, then it's constant. "Where did you get them?" "Are they a sibling group?" "How long have you had them?" He never, ever, ever gets that. Mixed kids obviously belong to black parent. White parent clearly can't be the bio parent of mixed kids. What the heck?


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

> But when I'm out with the kids, then it's constant. "Where did you get them?" "Are they a sibling group?" "How long have you had them?"


It's getting better especially with the new generation. I'm content that my daughter will have a better experience than me when it comes to inter-marriage. Something all children now can look forward to in the 21st century, and I can rest with that.

It will still be an issue sure, but most of the ignorance should be gone in perhaps 2050? If I live that long to see it


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

RandomDude said:


> It's getting better especially with the new generation. I'm content that my daughter will have a better experience than me when it comes to inter-marriage. Something all children now can look forward to in the 21st century, and I can rest with that.
> 
> It will still be an issue sure, but most of the ignorance should be gone in perhaps 2050? If I live that long to see it


not sure about this but one thing for sure is that we are proudly childless (our choice) because a child will consume our time together which are mediocre already (even thought we are in the civil service)

maybe by 2050 we would have a racial problem between terrains and the martians:lol:


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## Ikaika (Apr 23, 2012)

Between my family and wife's family we represent (over many generations):

European (practically entire continent)
Hawaiian
Japanese
Okinawan (Uchinanchu)
Chinese
Filipino
Puerto Rican
Tahitian
Mexican

In Hawaii we call people like us poi dogs. We are proud of it... And no one even thinks anything of it


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Sameold said:


> We are black and white and honestly don't see much beyond a raised eyebrow or two when we're together, which might be as much to do with the fact that I look ten years younger than I am and he looks that much older than he is.
> But when I'm out with the kids, then it's constant. "Where did you get them?" "Are they a sibling group?" "How long have you had them?" He never, ever, ever gets that. Mixed kids obviously belong to black parent. White parent clearly can't be the bio parent of mixed kids. What the heck?



Yea, my brother is adopted and he's 1/2 black and 1/2 white and always puts down that he's white on papers. People look at him funny and he says, "Well, i am white too...wtf." 

My other brother is adopted and from Salvador.

My uncle married an Indonesian woman (He's white) and my cousins are a beautiful mix of the two looks.

My cousin is white and married a Puerto Rican. 

My family never cared about "race", besides my grampa who was just raised wrong.


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

RandomDude said:


> I have to say it, children DO complicate things


thats why we don't have kids:smthumbup: let the others do it (recently i'm considering to be a sperm donor, with my qualification and my educational background i can make a good buck out of it :smthumbup: p.s not really.....)


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

I'm just glad I don't live where y'all live


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## Ikaika (Apr 23, 2012)

that_girl said:


> I'm just glad I dont' live where y'all live


Agree... We don't have any friends who are married within their ethnic/racial group. Just rare here.


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

that_girl said:


> I'm just glad I don't live where y'all live


Melbourne? (is it about me? or someone else)


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Wherever it is that it's so "trendy" and "odd" and where "children complicate things" just because the parents are different color/culture/etc. Bleh. Not a place for me.


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## Ikaika (Apr 23, 2012)

the liberal one said:


> Melbourne? (is it about me? or someone else)


Not about you... I think that_girl is referencing how it appears folks where you live seem to have a problem with interracial marriages. I agree... If that is the case, they would certainly have a problem with my family.


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

drerio said:


> Not about you... I think that_girl is referencing how it appears folks where you live seem to have a problem with interracial marriages. I agree... If that is the case, they would certainly have a problem with my family.


did that_girl read my previous post about how socially liberal they are in where i live? :scratchhead: thank god i live in a socially open-minded city or else i can smell a lynching mob


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## Ikaika (Apr 23, 2012)

the liberal one said:


> I notice that people were actually staring at us when we were holding hands or kissing and etc. That just give me the creeps on why people are still racially sensitive on racial-relationship. (not saying ****e to anyone but it gradually improves during the 7 years we were together)


This does not sound socially liberal where you live.


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

drerio said:


> This does not sound socially liberal where you live.


depends on which suburbs i guess, the area of Melbourne where they give me the creeps are mostly northern suburbs (poor/******* area)


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## Ikaika (Apr 23, 2012)

the liberal one said:


> depends on which suburbs i guess, the area of Melbourne where they give me the creeps are mostly northern suburbs (poor/******* area)


Where I live it makes no difference. Any island any location... No one would give you and your wife a second look here anywhere. Like I say, move to Hawaii you will look like everyone else.


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

drerio said:


> Where I live it makes no difference. Any island any location... No one would give you and your wife a second look here anywhere. Like I say, move to Hawaii you will look like everyone else.


sry health care suks there and also poverty too also middle class in US had to pay more taxes than the middle class australians too

no thanks


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Very true.

At least I don't have to be creeped out or worried about whom i love based on what others think. 

Well, i won't go into the deep South :lol: I've heard horrible stories there from friends of mine.


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## Ikaika (Apr 23, 2012)

the liberal one said:


> sry health care suks there and also poverty too also middle class in US had to pay more taxes than the middle class australians too
> 
> no thanks


Hawaii has had mandatory health care for 40 years... Our dirty little secret


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## Coffee Amore (Dec 15, 2011)

theliberalone - Why do your posts seem like you want to brag? What is there to brag about? :scratchhead:

Lots of people like me have had kinky sex without doing threesomes or swinging. And I live in a location where people can hold hands, kiss, make out in an interracial relationship without having to fear reactions from others like those in your neck of the woods. I like where I am. It's in the USA by the way.


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

Coffee Amore said:


> theliberalone - Why do your posts seem like you want to brag? What is there to brag about? :scratchhead:
> 
> Lots of people like me have had kinky sex without doing threesomes or swinging. And I live in a location where people can hold hands, kiss, make out in an interracial relationship without having to fear reactions from others like those in your neck of the woods. I like where I am. It's in the USA by the way.


yeah, the thread starting to turned up-side down by myself may be i m just being too protective.... i guess:scratchhead:

i feel like i m trolling right now..... ehhhhhhh.....


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## Lyris (Mar 29, 2012)

the liberal one said:


> thats why we don't have kids:smthumbup: let the others do it (recently i'm considering to be a sperm donor, with my qualification and my educational background i can make a good buck out of it :smthumbup


Except that it's illegal to make any money out of human tissue in all states of Austalia. Sperm banks don't pay you anything, nor do blood banks.

There's something weird about your posts. I've lived in the northern suburbs of Melbourne most of my life, I've taught at very ethnically diverse schools with all kinds of combinations and I've never seen the kinds of reactions to the (many) mixed race couples I know and have worked with.


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

Lyris said:


> Except that it's illegal to make any money out of human tissue in all states of Austalia. Sperm banks don't pay you anything, nor do blood banks.


sry it was meant to be a joke (forget to mention it grrr.......)



Lyris said:


> There's something weird about your posts. I've lived in the northern suburbs of Melbourne most of my life, I've taught at very ethnically diverse schools with all kinds of combinations and I've never seen the kinds of reactions to the (many) mixed race couples I know and have worked with.


coincidence?


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## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

no-one bats a frigging eyelid in London, nor should they


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## captainstormy (Jun 15, 2012)

I'm a white guy and my fiancé is a black woman. For the most part being with her hasn't been any different then being with a White woman. 

A few stares here and there but nothing really to write home about. Even when we announced our engagement there weren't many issues.

The only people we have in our families that have a problem with it are 68+ year old people. From them, I can understand. 

They grew up in a totally different world. When our grandparents were our age there were still Jim crow laws in place in a lot of the country. Course it isn't right, but its hard if not impossible to erase a lifetime of hate.

Funny thing is, to us at least is that our grandmothers say the same things about the opposite race. 

We will probably adopt kids later. Not because mixed kids have a hard life or anything, but she's already 32 and we wouldn't want kids for at least another 5-8 years.


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

I'm white and my wife's white. We get stared at, too. I always figured it was just because I was so devilishly handsome.


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## sinnister (Dec 5, 2010)

that_girl said:


> Oh hey! My stepdad was white (passed 2 years ago) and his wife (after my mom) is Salvadoran. No one cared and they live in Dana Point (my hometown).
> 
> Heh. Maybe we just don't care so we assume others don't. I'm just glad to live somewhere where most people don't give a crap.


TG, there are some well documented cases of some vato's that target blacks in parts of Cali and Texas as part of initiation into gangs.

It really does depend on where you live though. Drive 15 minutes down the road from those rough areas and nobody gives a crap who's bangin who. There too busy living their own life.


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## sweaty teddy (Nov 13, 2012)

the over all tone is it shouldn't matter. and I believe that is correct...it shouldn't matter. BUT there will be some hurdles just no way around it. nothing that can't be over come.

and as society becomes more and more blended there will be less and less stares so to speak.

and the over all gene pool will be more varied and healthier.


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## galian84 (May 7, 2012)

I live in NYC, so nobody looks twice if you're in an interracial relationship. And back when I used to live in Singapore, TONS of white/asian couples because of expatriates marrying and getting together with the locals.

It's more of my family who cares, though, they've said over and over they would prefer that I marry a Chinese man. My boyfriend is Latino, and they've been pressuring me to break up with him. Not for any reason in particular, just that he's Latino and is a single dad. Mom's side of the family thinks it will make the family 'look bad'. However, they are okay with me marrying a rich American guy, go figure.

But yes, why CAN'T it work? If you love somebody, why should it matter what the color of their skin is? After all, we are all of one race...HUMAN! Cultural differences should definitely be worked out before talking marriage, though. Even though my boyfriend and I get along most of the time, there have been times where our cultural differences have shined, and have caused arguments.


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

Satchel Rage said:


> Don't believe the hype. Interracial marriage is still a somewhat taboo subject in America. It's just people don't talk about it as often upfront, or rather they keep it on the hush for fear of looking like a racist or non progressive.
> 
> I've lived in the midwest, deep south and on the east coast and stayed on the west coast for sometime in my lifetime and everywhere has its issues with interracial marriage, it's just that in the deep south people are more open discuss their issues about race without fear. Plus it more closely resembles the country's antebellum years..


ok thats interersting enough, you seem to know the level of racism within america great job!



Satchel Rage said:


> A major reason obama was elected because his wife is black. The issues are still there, they are just not often discussed..


errr why obama is elected because of race? ok that is confusing "just" because his wife is black so he can be president?

you can just say that he is a president because he mum is white then (duh)


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## Anonymous07 (Aug 4, 2012)

the liberal one said:


> As the title mentioned, i'm just really interested your view on this small but a growing trend.
> 
> I'm a chinese had a LTR (later "married") to an australian wife. Really rare in accordance to statistics (only 2%!)(Interracial marriage - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia)
> 
> ...


I'm white(and I do mean white! lol. Blonde hair, light skin) and married my husband who is Mexican(handsomely tan, dark hair ). We live in southern California, so most people really don't even look twice. The whole area is very diverse, so an interracial couple is nothing to talk about. I will say though, when we have traveled to other areas in the country, we have gotten some looks/stares from people. It just depends on the area that you live. 

My parents were always ok with my relationship, but his parents were a little hesitant in the beginning. Since they have gotten to know me, they now love me like their own. 

It was a bit of a cultural shock for me in the beginning when I started dating my husband. I knew that his culture was family oriented, but didn't realize the extent of it. When his mom offered to drive me to go get my car from the shop after it was fixed, I had assumed it would just be the two of us going, but in the car it was me, his mom, sister, 2 nieces, and brother. It was a family outing! lol. The "small" family get-together they had was more of a huge party. It's nothing bad, but it was something for me to get used to.


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## anonim (Apr 24, 2012)

Satchel Rage said:


> A major reason obama was elected because his wife is black. The issues are still there, they are just not often discussed.


Non sequitur?


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

Anonymous07 said:


> I'm white(and I do mean white! lol. Blonde hair, light skin) and married my husband who is Mexican(handsomely tan, dark hair ). We live in southern California, so most people really don't even look twice. The whole area is very diverse, so an interracial couple is nothing to talk about. I will say though, when we have traveled to other areas in the country, we have gotten some looks/stares from people. It just depends on the area that you live.
> 
> My parents were always ok with my relationship, but his parents were a little hesitant in the beginning. Since they have gotten to know me, they now love me like their own.
> 
> It was a bit of a cultural shock for me in the beginning when I started dating my husband. I knew that his culture was family oriented, but didn't realize the extent of it. When his mom offered to drive me to go get my car from the shop after it was fixed, I had assumed it would just be the two of us going, but in the car it was me, his mom, sister, 2 nieces, and brother. It was a family outing! lol. The "small" family get-together they had was more of a huge party. It's nothing bad, but it was something for me to get used to.


lovely you manage to have a loving husband, for me theres not much cultural shock for me between my and my wife when we were dating. Mostly because i m quite westernize already and also both of our parents know each other before so we had virtually no problems at all.


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## Anonymous07 (Aug 4, 2012)

I should also mention that my great-grandmother is Mexican and married a white man. Now, back then, that was something to look at! They didn't even speak the same language for a long time and communicated through the use of dictionaries. There really is nothing that can stop two people in love.


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

Anonymous07 said:


> I should also mention that my great-grandmother is Mexican and married a white man. Now, back then, that was something to look at! They didn't even speak the same language for a long time and communicated through the use of dictionaries. There really is nothing that can stop two people in love.


that is what i call romance........... so sweet


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## Anonymous07 (Aug 4, 2012)

the liberal one said:


> lovely you manage to have a loving husband, for me theres not much cultural shock for me between my and my wife when we were dating. Mostly because i m quite westernize already and also both of our parents know each other before so we had virtually no problems at all.


Thanks! I am very blessed. My husband is amazing. He was born and raised in Mexico and came to the US when he was 18. He's still very traditional in a number of ways, but has adapted very well, too. His parents are not completely fluent in English, so we have a little bit of a communication barrier. I understand Spanish, but can't always respond, so my husband or his siblings will translate the rest for me.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

This thread is funny. Just do what you do and to hell with "others".


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

Anonymous07 said:


> Thanks! I am very blessed. My husband is amazing. He was born and raised in Mexico and came to the US when he was 18. He's still very traditional in a number of ways, but has adapted very well, too. His parents are not completely fluent in English, so we have a little bit of a communication barrier. I understand Spanish, but can't always respond, so my husband or his siblings will translate the rest for me.


well for me eventhough i m westernize i can still adopt my own traditions really well (i came to australia when i was 12 borned in HK). My parents are really good and fluent in english and my dad is her dad's co-worker and friend years back so both of our parents had dinner occasionally. Thus we don't even have communication barrier at all. No problems at all i guess



that_girl said:


> This thread is funny. Just do what you do and to hell with "others".


its not wether the thread is funny or not, eventhough people in TAM said that love had no boundaries yada yada etc etc

but we still live in a world of racism where white-superior blacks- evil asians- weak those racial slang still exist even within the 21th century the legacy of white imperialism for the past centuries and its avocation of white superiority never cease, it still deeply planted in the minds of people. (thats why forums like storm front a neo-nazi forum still exist and strong)

that is why this topic is a-bit serious than you thought


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Nah. I still think it's funny. I'm in an inter-racial marriage.

White people aren't the only people who are racist though  Every group I've known is racist. 

I have been living and working in an area that doesn't have many white people at all. It's mostly Latino and Black. I have never felt uncomfortable, but man, they sure hate each other AND they talk trash about themselves..."He is too dark" etc. My husband grew up in the hood. I come from white-bread suburbs of Southern CA. We live somewhere in the middle.

If people live in this fear and still think of inter-racial marriages as "taboo" and "shocking" and "trendy", then we'll never get out of the slump of it.

So, I still think it's funny that people think inter-racial marriages are so interesting. I am thankful to live in an area that not only doesn't care that I'm a white girl in their neighborhood, but doesn't care that I married "one of them".


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## the liberal one (Nov 4, 2012)

remember the historic legacy of imperialism will not going to cease for the next century or so (thus its all down to history in the end


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