# He doesn't want a divorce



## damsel (Aug 29, 2012)

I have expressed to my husband that I wanted a divorce for several times now, starting less than 2 years ago. However, he keeps promising me this and that and somehow always reels me back in.

My husband believes that the main reason of me wanting divorce is that his family (mom and brother) live with us and have caused so many problems and now trying to fix the problems by trying to find a place for them (but they don't want to leave). Yes they're the reason I wanted divorce but there's more.. Long story short, I haven't been happy with my husband, I actually became depressed while with him. I don't see myself happy if I stay with him. My husband also promised me that he will change and make me happy. I am not convinced.

I am in Canada and according to prov law I need to be separated for a year to be able to file for a divorce. I don't have money to get my own place (and I don't want to waste money by renting), so to get things going, I moved to basement of my own house few weeks ago and try to not talk to my husband unless it's necessary.

We have a 15 month old boy. I am also starting work in 2 weeks and hopefully in 6 months I will have enough money and courage to hire a good lawyer.

In the meantime, is there anything else I could do? How do I convince my husband to divorce me? I feel trapped.. Thanks for reading


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

damsel said:


> I have expressed to my husband that I wanted a divorce for several times now, starting less than 2 years ago. However, he keeps promising me this and that and somehow always reels me back in.
> 
> My husband believes that the main reason of me wanting divorce is that his family (mom and brother) live with us and have caused so many problems and now trying to fix the problems by trying to find a place for them (but they don't want to leave). Yes they're the reason I wanted divorce but there's more.. Long story short, I haven't been happy with my husband, I actually became depressed while with him. I don't see myself happy if I stay with him. My husband also promised me that he will change and make me happy. I am not convinced.
> 
> ...


You gave very little info here, so I have to go by what you did give.

How are you trapped? You can get divorce anytime you want one. You don’t need his permission to divorce.

You cannot leave because you have no way to support yourself. That’s not your husband’s fault. 

He is moving his family out. I can see how having his family around could hurt your relationship. Hopefully they will be out of there soon.

You, not he, are responsible for your own happiness. Tell me about the good things in your life. About your friends; hobbies, things that you enjoy doing.


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## damsel (Aug 29, 2012)

Trapped like I don't know how to behave. I don't want to give him any hopes but then I am scared of his reaction.. So maybe trapped isn't the right word.

Maybe scared is.. I'm scared of his reaction. Today he was pissed at me for talking to him with no interest, he ended up cleaning up, loudly, throwing and banging stuff, in front of out child.. So I took my son to the basement and my husband turned the tv loud, not realizing that my son was trying to sleep. 

That moment I considered calling one of my friends..


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## damsel (Aug 29, 2012)

It's kinda hard to see good things right now.. But yeah I do have nice friends. However me and my son have been sick for about a month we barely see them.. Plus the holiday busy-ness. I'm trying to set up something.. Hopefully it will happen..

I also decided to communicate less with people I used to hang out with but not really fond of because of the negativity.. They judge and talk negative about people, they whine and complain about unnecessary things..

Hobbies.. I love watching the movies, watching YouTube tutorials (cleaning, make up, diy and apply them in real life). Really, I am happy and I love my life except for my husband and his family I guess haha..


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