# Exposing An Affair



## lonewolf8545 (Jan 12, 2013)

I have a couple who are friends of mine. The last few months I have noticed her (the wife)visiting a divorced guy who lives in my neighborhood and I'm fairly certain there is something going on. She has no business being there.

Is there a discrete way I can inform her husband about this without injecting myself into the situation?


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## walkonmars (Aug 21, 2012)

Tell him: "Hank!, I saw Nancy going to visit Chad who lives in my neighborhood last Tuesday afternoon, I didn't get a chance to say Hi, I'm not sure if she saw me. I don't want her to think I was rude. Please extend my apologies."


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## Hortensia (Feb 1, 2013)

Yes- an anonyme. Maybe take a pic of her entering here or with him and mail it to him, or email it to him from a different email address. He has to know.


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## Jasel (Jan 8, 2013)

Just send an anonymous email to him from a gmail account saying you've been observing his wife going to "such and suches place" with the address and times you've been there, that it's suspicious and then leave it at that.


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## Headspin (May 13, 2012)

lonewolf8545 said:


> I have a couple who are friends of mine. The last few months I have noticed her (the wife)visiting a divorced guy who lives in my neighborhood and I'm fairly certain there is something going on. She has no business being there.
> 
> Is there a discrete way I can inform her husband about this without injecting myself into the situation?


Easy 

"hi man how is going, didn't know you had friends over here near me. Next time I see *** I'll invite her in for tea and biscuits maybe you should come over with her as well"

"Hey next time *** comes over here to see her friend why don't you come over and we'll crack a beer or two whilst they're doing girlie stuff!"


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## CleanJerkSnatch (Jul 18, 2012)

How about this:

"take offense if you wish but I see your wife do X, Y, Z(describe what she does) that she shouldn't be doing or going to while you are gone. I'm not saying she's having an affair but I just wanted to let you know and make sure that you DO know that SHE is doing......sorry, bye"


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## Headspin (May 13, 2012)

CleanJerkSnatch said:


> How about this:
> 
> "take offense if you wish but I see your wife do X, Y, Z(describe what she does) that she shouldn't be doing or going to while you are gone. I'm not saying she's having an affair but I just wanted to let you know and make sure that you DO know that SHE is doing......sorry, bye"


hehe he did say discrete


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## 3putt (Dec 3, 2012)

What's with all this anonymous crap? If you're the right kind of person you should be proud to out the adulterers for what they are.

Screw this anonymous crap. You're either all in or all out on being a morally righteous being.

There's no half way. 

Damn.


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## Paladin (Oct 15, 2011)

@3putt

The world is almost never black and white like that. There is a fair amount of gray area to our daily existence. We as humans also get a choice on how we act and what we do on a daily basis. The OP wants to do the honorable thing, but does not want to expose himself to unessisary drama, pain, and anguish. That is certainly a choice well within his right to make. Being anonymous has many advantages, in fact, I highly doubt this forum would exist if it required people to post their real names. Anonymous tip lines are responsible for stopping white collar crime, and various other abuse. I think there is more than enough room here for wanting to do the right ting without getting personally and emotionally involved.

@OP

Follow the anonymous exposure advice.


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## keko (Mar 21, 2012)

Odds are if you tell the husband now, at first he'll be denial and confront his wife with zero evidence as a result she'll deny and he'll believe her.

If you can take a few pictures of her entering this man's house then leaving that would be very helpful to this poor man. A picture is worth a thousand words as they say.

Even better option would be if you have an idea on the next time she'll be at that house, call the husband to come ASAP to that address and see it for himself.

Unfortunately anything short of him having hard evidence in his hands, he won't believe a word of it.


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## AlphaHalf (Aug 5, 2012)

Print out a letter and send it to him. Use a business address from wherever as a return address. Let him know whats going on and mention the return address is a decoy to hide your identity. Let him know that something isn't right and tell him to pay extra attention to his wife's whereabouts. This should get him suspicious enough to take action. (unless he is a has RED FLAG Avoidance Disease)


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## 3putt (Dec 3, 2012)

Paladin said:


> @3putt
> 
> The world is almost never black and white like that. There is a fair amount of gray area to our daily existence. We as humans also get a choice on how we act and what we do on a daily basis. The OP wants to do the honorable thing, but does not want to expose himself to unessisary drama, pain, and anguish. That is certainly a choice well within his right to make. Being anonymous has many advantages, in fact, I highly doubt this forum would exist if it required people to post their real names. Anonymous tip lines are responsible for stopping white collar crime, and various other abuse. I think there is more than enough room here for wanting to do the right ting without getting personally and emotionally involved.
> 
> ...


This forum is anonymous for obvious reasons. Real life is not. Whatever pain and anguish he may go through is not of his own making, but the perps of the deed.

I find it incredibly hypocritical to claim to want to do the right thing but not assign your name to it. Right is right, and wrong is wrong. There's nothing gray about that. That IS black and white.

I can't speak for anyone but myself here, but I have never been ashamed of outing a wrong of this nature, or any other nature for that matter. I've also never lost anything or anyone I couldn't easily replace with better.

Sorry Paladin, gonna have to vehemently disagree here with you.

There's no gray area when it comes to my integrity.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

Ask your friend way his wife is going over to such and such's house all the time.

Maybe their in an open marriage and he already knows she has a boyfriend?

Maybe there is some business together?

Maybe he doesn't have a clue and will thank you?


If your friend is being decieved, screwed over, and ripped off why won't you want to help him out?


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## Kaya62003 (Jan 8, 2013)

walkonmars said:


> Tell him: "Hank!, I saw Nancy going to visit Chad who lives in my neighborhood last Tuesday afternoon, I didn't get a chance to say Hi, I'm not sure if she saw me. I don't want her to think I was rude. Please extend my apologies."


Haha! That's awesome!!!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Aunt Ava (Jan 24, 2013)

walkonmars said:


> Tell him: "Hank!, I saw Nancy going to visit Chad who lives in my neighborhood last Tuesday afternoon, I didn't get a chance to say Hi, I'm not sure if she saw me. I don't want her to think I was rude. Please extend my apologies."


Excellent suggestion.


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## cj9947 (Jul 9, 2011)

3putt said:


> This forum is anonymous for obvious reasons. Real life is not. Whatever pain and anguish he may go through is not of his own making, but the perps of the deed.
> 
> I find it incredibly hypocritical to claim to want to do the right thing but not assign your name to it. Right is right, and wrong is wrong. There's nothing gray about that. That IS black and white.
> 
> ...


Amen...100%...stand up an be accountable...that's how "Heroes" are made...you would be my friend for life if you informed me...


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## cantthinkstraight (May 6, 2012)

"Hay Mark, is Susan close with Todd? The reason I ask is I saw her 
car over at his place a few times and found it odd. You may want to check into it."


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## workindad (May 7, 2011)

I'd tell him straight up. I've noticed your wife stopping by and visiting XXX. 

Or you could email him a link to this thread and tell him he may want to read it carefully.

Good luck
WD


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