# Need advice quick



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

Hi everyone.. I ve posted before about my marriage issues. Mostly househd stuff that u could see in postes below. When i came home today i noticed on her computer she left on the desk with facebook open that she had a conversation with and x-student from her x-work (she quit 2 years ago) and she said nothing wrong but man this guy was hitting on her saying: your beautiful, hard to forget and inviting her out to his play then for drinks. She never acknoledged those conversations just went onto different topic... But wtf this guy! He is outta line. He must know shes married as she talks about her kids and im on her fb! 
What should i do? Stay quite and observe, let her know i saw...mmm perhaps when kids were playing with her ipad? Outright tell her to msg him reminding him in a nice way those comments are j appropriate? 

Im pissed because we have been having troubles yet this guys making moves on her thru fb and she is talking more tto strNgers these days than me....
Am i perhaps overreacting???
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

I don't know you or what you're like Doc, but this is just me. Since she didn't reciprocate, I'd msg him back, tell him I'm her husband and that I saw his messages to her. If he'd like to be with her he'd have to go through me first. So what would he like to do? 

Bur that's just me.


----------



## Toffer (Jan 31, 2012)

I think I'd monitor for a while since she's talking to other strangers too

Get keylooging softwate now and start checking the phone records


----------



## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

I'd send a message to the kid and let him know he is playing with fire and for now you will keep it civil but if he continues he will have hell to pay.

Then start researching this POS kid and find out if he has a GF or is married. That way if and when it happens again you have some ammo and can expose his @ss.

Don't say anything to your wife, that way if your old lady approaches you about confronting OM then you know he contacted your wife when he was told not to and then you can expose the crap out of him.


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Yea, I'd do the same thing that anchorwatch said... acutally i've done it before.


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

Really! Id have to msg thru fb because thats where he msgd her! Then she woukd know i did+that i looked ...
I do get the idea tho that id better quash this sooner than later!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Yes you should squash it.

Perhaps the two of you need to share passwords to your accounts. That tends to make people behave better.


Don't tell her right now. Keep and eye out and find out who he is. then you can get in touch with him some way other than facebook.

A woman should shut a man down quickly if she is not interested.


----------



## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

Thehusband2 said:


> Really! Id have to msg thru fb because thats where he msgd her! Then she woukd know i did+that i looked ...
> I do get the idea tho that id better quash this sooner than later!
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I've read some of your other post before. I didn't answer them because I didn't feel I had a grasp of your situation. This post ended that. 

You have an interloper on your marriage, that is actively perusing your wife. Instead of acting quickly to let this OM know you are aware of his advances and will defend marriage, you are worried about what your wife might think, about you casually looking at her effbook page. Total fail as a man and husband!!! That's why your wife doesn't respect you and treat you well.

This is why you have problems with your wife, in and out of the bedroom. You are more worried about how she sees you, than how you see yourself. She has little respect for you because you have little respect for yourself. If you did you wouldn't worry about what she thought. You would take action based on what you know in your heart is right and have no problem letting her decide whether she liked it or not. 

Do you think she a wants man like this? Of course not! That is why she is always angry with you, This "Nice Guy" or beta behavior is ruining your marriage, your family and you. This is not going to end well if YOU don't change. Do not let the fear of disturbing the delicate balance of the relationship stop you. The relationship is in a spiral and will not last this way. Without respect for you, it won't be long before she accepts another's advances. 

Your compass needs to be re-calibrated and your charts need to be upgraded to put your ship back on course. Start with browsing Dr. Glover's site and take the quiz there. No More Mr. Nice Guy Then read the book and see how damaging the type of behavior you exhibited, with this post, is to yourself and a relationship. 

Read Athol Kay's book too. Married Man Sex Life 

Start posting in the Men's forum. Look at Deejo's sticky thread at the top of the forum there. 

Sorry if I come off harsh.

Now get rid of that interloper and display yourself as a man, who is not fearful of what others think when he takes action to protect his wife and family. Let your wife see that you can stand up for yourself and her.


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

Thanks...harsh is ok i do feel beta in some situations.

I have no issue confronting i was just thinking that if she knows i look and IF. There is a problem, the it coculd be taken underground!

Will read all those thanks for advice time to change quick
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## center1 (Jan 25, 2013)

Be honest with her. Tell her it's inappropriate and that you will not tolerate this in your marriage. Tell her to send him a firm message and stop it now.


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

Ok guys...so we had a great weekend Together and i have not yet told her that i know about this guy private msging her over FB. Just didnt have opportunity on her ipad or whatever. I am thinking if i look as if i am snooping, she may hide this sort of info although i dont feel thats likely. 

Today i snooped in her fb and found another pm asking why she didnt come out on sat.. She didnt answer it, although she replied to many of her girl friends' pmsFor the record he invited her for drinks she just avoided that part of the convo and kept talking about light general life things, things even coworkers/starngers on bus would talk about. I have such an urge to tell this guy off sneaky prick pming and married women BUT am worried about looking like a spy rather than for exampel opening fb while playing on her ipad together with kids as they use her ipad...

What do u guys think... Be patient for a proper opportunity or say screw it and just tell her
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## jfv (May 29, 2012)

The fact is she is not actively shutting him down which is why he keeps trying. If you allow this to continue he is just going to get more bold and she might start responding. You've already gotten great advice...stop stalling. RUN HIM OFF! and tell HER whats what.


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

ok thanks!! you are right which is why i am steaming on the inside...although i realize in her eyes i must not be all that alpha as some of the fellow posters here have stated... i am wondering once she finds that i have been snoping will that not only look more beta????

i am trying to be cool calm and collected but this is eating me up that some biatch thinks he can say those things....and i know exactly what i want to tell him too


----------



## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

anchorwatch said:


> I don't know you or what you're like Doc, but this is just me. Since she didn't reciprocate, I'd msg him back, tell him I'm her husband and that I saw his messages to her. If he'd like to be with her he'd have to go through me first. So what would he like to do?
> 
> Bur that's just me.


I like this. I would probably then block him on FB. But I would tell my wife afterwards that I saw it, I pi$$ed me off so I knew she would want to block him so I did.


----------



## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

anchorwatch said:


> I've read some of your other post before. I didn't answer them because I didn't feel I had a grasp of your situation. This post ended that.
> 
> You have an interloper on your marriage, that is actively perusing your wife. Instead of acting quickly to let this OM know you are aware of his advances and will defend marriage, you are worried about what your wife might think, about you casually looking at her effbook page. Total fail as a man and husband!!! That's why your wife doesn't respect you and treat you well.
> 
> ...


This ... In spades.

:iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree:


----------



## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

Thehusband2 said:


> ok thanks!! you are right which is why i am steaming on the inside...although i realize in her eyes i must not be all that alpha as some of the fellow posters here have stated... i am wondering once she finds that i have been snoping will that not only look more beta????
> 
> i am trying to be cool calm and collected but this is eating me up that some biatch thinks he can say those things....and i know exactly what i want to tell him too


Stop worrying about how you look and be the man.


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

ok thx


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

Ok so i talked with her...she didnt even ask how i knew she just said its a friend from her old work... She aslo said she didnt comment on his comments because she felt she is pretty and unforgettable and didnt need to say anything. She hnderstands that it is inappropriate didnt argue at all. She said she'll msg him letting him know

I will check with her to make sure thats done!

Felt better once i said whats on my mind! We even had another conversation aftrr this one which was unusual as its been a little cold in our house lately...

I realize i still need to change my game though!
Anyone have any advice on adapting the 180 for a non cheating spouse...i mean the 180 is meant for ws but i just wanna change without the moving on part .. Thats not necessary in my case????
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

I would't use the 180, unless it was time to move on.

I would follow Dr. Glover's advice. 

Did you get NMMNG yet or read the points he makes on his site?


----------



## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

Message the kid:

"My wife and I would be happy to join you for drinks and dinner. Since you are just starting out in the adult world I'll give the benefit of the doubt that you didn't know not to approach another man's wife. You never invite another mans wife out for drinks unless your intent is to undermine the marriage, or feel reckless and are looking for some time off work to convalesce from a severe beat down.

What time would you like us there?"


----------



## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

Step up you Alpha game as you assert your boundaries. Women dig alpha men who know where to find the L Spot. <--- H and I just read that last night... Loved it!


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

ok, i have downloaded the book no more mr nice guy and read intro...wow i am so a nice guy


----------



## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

Eye opening, isn't it?


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

kinda pathetic haha i feel down!! I thought i was a hardworking type but seems ima chump ... well better late then never


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

one of the example intro stories sounds just like me specially my prevoious thread about cleaning and not being able to do enough...wow

thats actually disappointing .. i wonder if i would feel the same about my wife if she did for me what i feel i do for her... i.e. would i feel less attracyed for her or is it just one way??


----------



## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

It's definitely written with a male bias, yet I can see it goes both ways. 

Example

Early in my marriage I found that the more my young bride did the more I slacked off, the more I slacked off the more resent full she got. 

Does that sound familiar?


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

I read several chapters of no more mr nice guy ... And wow!

I now realise and understand some of the advice people have been giving!

Do things because you want to
My needs are a priority
Good sex!!'

I have identified things as the book suggests to work on and will start to implement!!!
Hopefully wife notices ... Jk  
That point was a huge one!!!

Im gonna keep reading but for now thanks!!!


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

so i am still reading the no more mr nice guy book and was wondering. I come home yesterday and my wife looks so upset. is putting kids to bed, then gets down stairs starts cleaning kitchen and light cooking --> rice and stuff for tomorrow (today). 

I give her a hand, unpack my stuff, put it is tense.

although i will try to implement what i am learning in the book, I am wondering how to go about these tense and awkward moments.

And, I don't even know whats the matter here???

I wrote her a text this morning asking what the matter, then proposing some solutions to those:
for example:
Too much work outside house-we can hire extra help every couple weeks, i can take kids and go grocery shop on weekend mornings
more personal time (she is starting a photography course sunday)

i also told her i want to break this cycle between us and it would be nice to do more as a couple perhaps go for a run in the morning or whatever...

are these reasonable non-doormat solutions?? i just really dont know what her issue is and what to do...and yes i have tried to talk but she just says nothings wrong...


----------



## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

Stop worrying about her happiness. She is responsible for her own happiness. Just like you are for your's.

Tell her you sense something is bothering her. When she says nothing, tell her you know better and move on. 



You let her tell the OM that he was inappropriate? That was very beta behavior. You should have let her see you step up and personally contact him. 


Let me ask you, do you date your wife?


----------



## Toffer (Jan 31, 2012)

Thehusband2 said:


> so i am still reading the no more mr nice guy book and was wondering. I come home yesterday and my wife looks so upset. is putting kids to bed, then gets down stairs starts cleaning kitchen and light cooking --> rice and stuff for tomorrow (today).
> 
> I give her a hand *BETA*, unpack my stuff, put it is tense.
> 
> ...


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

Toffer: are you saying i should not help around house? Those are things that need doing...we rent so its not like i can go fix a roof. Seriously she is constantly freaking about how much work she has basically she is unhappy snd cannot handle it... I try to help but helpin is gonna be THOSE kinda chores ...
Should i do nothi g? I also bath the kids and play withem is that beta... 

Seriously ... Wgat work around the house ISNT beta???
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Toffer (Jan 31, 2012)

Not saying don't do any of it.

Be sure that any chores that need to be done are split between both of you

Do both of you work 40 hours a week?
How many hours of class time does she have?
How many hours a night/weekend does she say she needs for school work/studying?


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

Toffer said:


> Not saying don't do any of it.
> 
> Be sure that any chores that need to be done are split between both of you
> 
> ...


i think they are and actually she does more.
she is a SAHM so she talkes kids to school, cooks, laundry, etc... shops...
she has a photography class for 3 hours on a sunday morning, still hasnt started but will this weekend so she doesnt study

she has a casual part time job once every while like maybe every 3 weeks and event.

so knowing that...i dont mind helping...
i come home and there is most of the time food ready for me...in turn i usually clean up dishes...beta?? or fair?

i dont see my kids during day...so i dont mind bathing/playing wither, and taking them to class on weekends...

i certainly am not doing all the work or more than my share

although some have suggested that since she is a sham she should have all that done before i get home....dont know how reasonable that is???


----------



## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

You may have missed my question. 

What do you do to get her out of the house?

What do you do to romance her?

Do you date your wife?


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

anchorwatch said:


> You may have missed my question.
> 
> What do you do to get her out of the house?
> 
> ...


well... we do go out and when we do we go out for dinner, for drinks and just talk.

i have to adnit it was better before september... we went out quite often together had quite good conversations.. when we put kids to sleep we would often stay up and just talk...alot more sex too!

in september .. i started schooAND her 18 year old sister arrived (she will be staying for a year sept 2013) ... honestly i feel replaced

things she would have been excited to tell me are know old news by the time i come home as she has already told them to our guest....
her sister goes to school but she is constantly there...so no more sitting on the patio like a coupel and just talking...you know what i mean...she isnt intrusive rude or demanding but just always there...
i was onboard with her coming thinking it would make my wife happy...thinking why not....oops i was wrong

asking her to leave just is not an option...she is her sister ... it just wont happen ... so if my wife are gonna have couple time ot will have to be away from home

last year we just her and i went for several weekend vacations...awesome!

this year nothing...something happened to son and know my wfe feels she cant trust anyone to carefully watch kids for even 2 nights..****ty!

so that is my life ... school and home (to work, not enjoy my family, under constant tension)

this year


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

i was looking at quick getaway to a beach to give us some vacation time...wont happen because of the childcare situation...she doent feel her sister can even handle out 2 kids so not even that is a benefit


----------



## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

That's a big problem. 

Don't let your head spin. 

You two need to spend a least 15 hours a week together, in order to keep the relationship alive.

It's time little sister pays back and lets you guys out of the house for a while.


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

anchorwatch said:


> That's a big problem.
> 
> Don't let your head spin.
> 
> ...


Thanks!
yes it is a problem...sister has come home many times to watch kids so we can go out...she is actually nice...it is just that her presence basically changes the dynamics

15 hours a week...wow sounds impossible at this moment!


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

for example of how things changed...in august we all went out with kids and her sister to the fair...came back wife and i went for dinner...she ended up wanting to go to park to do it!! haha it was awesome...she was asking (hinting) it, not me asking for it...

i really dont feel i have changed....

Dynamics have though:

kids go to kindergarten and preschool
i am away although not THAT much more than last year this time
her sister is here
PLUS now there is all this "work" to do...i put quotes on that because i dont get why there is this need to get things done now whereas a year ago we were sipping beers on a wednesday nought on the couch no issues (kids were in preschool those day although i was taking them in morning) AND she was taking care of a baby
 as a nanny...so sounds like more work...


----------



## Toffer (Jan 31, 2012)

Thehusband2 said:


> in september .. i started schooAND her 18 year old sister arrived (she will be staying for a year sept 2013) ... honestly i feel replaced
> 
> *In light of the above (you're working AND going to school to make a better life for your family) your wife SHOULD have all or most of those chore items done before you get home!
> 
> ...


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

thanks toffer
that DOES happen... and sometimes its good, but as soon as the week arrives it just gets tense, and sometimes we actually blow up and fight...its a f'ed-up cycle man!

we do actually have evenings out locally...its just not the same as last year and definetly not the 15 hours/week that AW was mentioning and I have read elsewhere too!

it doesnt matter but i go to school full time and dont work, but because of the way things are here in canada i can support my family by going to med school ... lots of grants (free $), loans etc...


----------



## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

Here read this, The Policy of Unidivided Attention

I thought 15 hours per week would be stressing too, till I tried it.

15 or 20 mins over morning coffee, 30 mins at lunch, 1 or 2 hours after the kids are in bed, 2 or 3 hours for a Saturday shopping trip, intimate conversation or sex/cuddling at bed time, a walk or run, ect, ect, ect. 

BTW, it did work!


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

AW: i totally believe you! because it was working last years when we must have had that much tme or more of just us!

it is always awesome when we go away even for a cople days! its like we r dating again

even when we are not away it is awesome to just be alone...we had a great conversation last time we went out... 3-4 hours flew by...i wish it were like that all the time


BUT she is so stressed that it seems impossible to even get to the stage of her wanting for us to go out and have an intimate conversation---let alone in the mood for sex...


----------



## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

You have to work at romance, or you not going to get laid. Sorry, I mean intimacy. 

Try to get it in, when you get the opportunity.

That may just be all she's missing. If she is missing it she is vulnerable to accepting it from others.

Make sure she gets it from you and not from someone else. 

Here's more reading. Digest this.

Basic Concepts

The Most Important Emotional Needs


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

So i talked to my wife about the policy of undivided attention and she mentioned it sounds good BUT lets start with 15 minutes of being nice.... WTF... She is the one who is always angry and tense

I dont think she values time together... Dont know where to go from here i mean it cannot be all me right??
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

Thehusband2 said:


> So i talked to my wife about the policy of undivided attention and she mentioned it sounds good BUT lets start with 15 minutes of being nice.... WTF... She is the one who is always angry and tense
> 
> I dont think she values time together... Dont know where to go from here i mean it cannot be all me right??
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Hey guys... Thanks to those whove made comments...
As u know some guy over face book was hitting on my wife calling her pretty and hard to forget i found an opportunity and confronted her... Gave her a choice of her telling him its unappropriate or me... I respect her and she has never done anything to disrespect me except perhaps not stopping these stupid comments.

She said she would...and i have have been (rightly) criticised by you guys about this beta move... Well it was done!


I have been monitoring her fb, and today he contacted her and totally hit on her revealing his attraction to her... She immediately stopped it, in its tracks! 
Im proud of her because that IS exactly what i expected after knowing her for 10 years...

He told her she is right besides he has a beautiful gf! Hmmm

But my wife comes from a culture where guys and girls can b friends and she FEELS can have guys as friends... So she made it clear to him that he should NOT talk about attraction, invite her out, etc... just friends

I know what she means by friends ... Just friends everyone IS her friend! 

But after readingthis... It doesnt sit easy that he thi ks he can essentially try to f my family up... 

My question: do i leave it as handled, do i further solidy it via an email/ fb msg to this guy? He has a gf too?? Slimeball!!!!

Can i send facebook msgs to people who arent my friends on fb??

Finally? I am speechless... I am not a confrontational guy! What else do i say that wife hasnt already???
Some quick advice please!!!!!!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

Ok ... This is the msg i prepared the guy!! Keep in mind im 34, a parent, and a future doc, so i cannot threaten to beat him up! 

Msg: I dont know what kinda family you grew up with, but, as a MAN you respect a married woman and her family ... U crossed the line bro! Cowards like you with no morals disgust me seriously... I suggest you find yourself a single girl to hit on or perhaps ur gf who by the way might want to know about ur "attraction" to my wife! Fb me if you need clarification...
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

Feedback please!!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Drover (Jun 11, 2012)

seriously? you call him "bro"?

anyway maybe she left it for you to see intentionally? so you'll see she didn't respond? or to make you jealous?

I'd definitely let her know you saw it. I mean you sat down and it was there. Not the same as snooping. No reason for her to be angry. And I'd make her block him.


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

Drover said:


> seriously? you call him "bro"?
> 
> anyway maybe she left it for you to see intentionally? so you'll see she didn't respond? or to make you jealous?
> 
> I'd definitely let her know you saw it. I mean you sat down and it was there. Not the same as snooping. No reason for her to be angry. And I'd make her block him.


Thanks dover.. After rereading i removed bro

I will ask her tonight whether she told the guy yet and then i will look to see and will see the conveersation ... I will make a block and will facebook msg him (can i do that if he's not my "friend")?

Also what donyou think of my overall msg?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

So i sent the msg and got a response ... Guy said he shouldnt have said that, etc... He also said he'd like to meet one day NOT to argue but to smooth it over... 

F"@&ing coward... I hate people like that! 

Anyways...thats how it is for now
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

Good job doc. Now he knows you'll get in his way, he'll look for an easier target.

Now work on that UA time.


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

What do you guys think? I sent the msg to the guy... He basically backed down.. Wife knows about this and now i still have some questions abiut this situation... Is it insecure of me to ask or should i be getti g to the bottom of this.. 
Wife thinks it is settled we have talked but i do have lingering qs!!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

What are you concerns?


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

anchorwatch said:


> What are you concerns?


Well she worked at the school he went to 2 years ago Nd he jndicated he had a crush since then... There was also anconversation in aUgust that i was following on facebook... Apearred benign BUT at one point she deleted that thread from her facebook inbox... So i am wondering why? At first it didnt register as suspicious but now yes!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

Have you asked her about it?

I'd think he was doing more of the same banter and she deleted it as inappropriate. You said she ignored the recent flirting and advances. She agreed with you, without any reservations, when you confronted her about it. No? 

Still, I'd tell her I'm not comfortable with her having a friend that knows she is married and thinks it's okay to make advances on her. That's someone of low morals. I would ask her to block him and cut off contact with him, because he crossed my marital boundaries and obviously can't be trusted. 

Look it could be she was getting something out of it and let things continue. Then at some point got uncomfortable and deleted it. You can go on and on with a multitude of scenarios, if you don't have trust in her or the FB convos. You going to have to go on what you have at the moment. Make boundaries like I suggested, to protect the marriage from OSFs like that. And be aware of whats going on. I also suggest you get away from this idea of privacy in a marriage and allow both of you to see each other's communications and have each others passwords. The Policy of Radical Honesty

Let me ask you, is she passive about boundaries? The type not to want to hurt someone's feelings? Could it be she just to nice to the extreme, that she is afraid of drama?

Have you read "His Needs, Her Needs" yet?


----------



## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

BTW, did you reply to his invitation?


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

No i didnt... Do u feel i should hav??

Do u feel i shouldnt inquire from wife??
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

Meh, Id give the a$$hat nothing. 

I thought your msg said it all. 

And inquire about the past interaction. As in "Radical Honesty"

Ask for her to cut him off and explain it as I described.


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

Anchor!! Thx seriouly for your advice ... I have found this process tough. You give me good resources and actually this event is a good catalyst to address things and get her to start address weaknesses in our relationship
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

I got the same advice here, by some veteran posters, when my marriage was on the rocks. 

Dr. Harley did the rest.


----------



## Thehusband2 (Aug 25, 2011)

So did it improve??
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

40 years together next month, married 38. More in love now than when we were kids and still can't keep our hands off each other. 

All it took was a little reading and a few simple ideas, that all lead to a revelation that we had no idea what we were doing. lol

Edit: And a good bit of working at the ideas. ;-)


----------

