# Dirty Talk



## almostmadeit (Jul 5, 2012)

My husband and I have been married for 10 yrs. We got married young I was 19 he was 23, I am his second wife. (The first was a "shotgun" marriage, he got home from work and his dad took him and his pregnant girlfriend to the courthouse). We have always had a great sex life, we have done it almost everyday for the 12years we have been together and we always keep it interesting. 
Here's the thing, lately (last 2 or 3 months) everytime we have sex he asks me to imagine he is someone else. He has some insecurity issues and thinks he is subpar down there( he is NOT, he has always satisfied me) and I think that has a lot to do with this fantasy of his. 
He will ask me to talk to him like he is someone else and at first I thought it was spicy, you know, something different and fun once in a while. Now it's almost an everyday thing and he has even talked about finding another man that he can watch me have sex with. I love my husband and dont want to sleep with anyone else. In fantasy its fun and exciting, but the thought of actually doing it is not. Anyone got any advice on this??? I don't know what to do about this.


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## kingsfan (Jun 4, 2012)

I didn't vote because there isn't a 'no, including no fantasy' option.

I have never fantasized about someone else when I'm with my fiancee, and, assuming things don't change, never will. We have had general discussions about sex and the subject of involving someone else came up, but neither of us ever showed any inclination to do that and generally found it to be something totally not for us. I want to share my fiancees body with no one but me. In fact, the mere idea of her being with someone else is enough to give me a panic attack if I really thought about it (likely a side effect from a rampant cheating ex-wife).

As for your question, I don't see anywhere in the post that you've actually talked to him. Have you explained to him that the dirty talk of this nature is no longer spicy for you. and the idea of being with another man is not only revolting, but so is his insistance on making it come true?

How long have you been together btw?


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## ScarletBegonias (Jun 26, 2012)

i think it's unhealthy to do this sort of thing. 

role play is fun once in a while but this is a habit for him now and you guys definitely need to have a serious talk.

i'm with kingsfan on the voting, need an option for the 'no and there is no fantasy of this'


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## J.R.Jefferis (Jun 27, 2012)

I agree with the posts above and would only add that a fantasy is just that, a FANTASY. Keep it that way and try not to let it became a reality. It would forever change the nature of your relationship...almost always for the worse.

JR


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## ScarletBegonias (Jun 26, 2012)

yup. some fantasies are not meant to be brought to reality.


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

Could not vote as the was not a "NO" choice.

So no.

I get the fantasy thing for some folks.

But this whole concept is a complete turnoff for me. Frankly if I was ever asked to do this, it would be a deal breaker.

Doing something like this would have been something to do with a GF who I knew was not the one I would marry. Just for kicks. But not in a serious relationship. And even then it would only be MFF. That was never anything I was that into anyway.


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## Coffee Amore (Dec 15, 2011)

I can't vote on a poll that doesn't provide a "No" option.


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## jennablu (May 10, 2012)

I would just talk to him and tell him you think it is hot to have as a 'fantasy' together and like talking about SOMETIMES when you 'get it on' but nothing you would want to do in reality! 

I have been married 8 years to my hubby and LOVE the fantasy of a 3 way (ffm) and love when we talk about it to get us going - but I know there is NO WAY we would do it for real.


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

Add me to the ones who have no vote option... my vote is no, none of the above.


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## bkaydezz (Jul 9, 2012)

I will just put this plain and simple.
EVERYONE is weird in some sort or another.
He is letting his fantasy control him, and he is pushing it.
There is nothing wrong with spice but wanting to bring in an intruder? nope. nope. nope.


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