# My wife left, and I'm just turned on all the time...



## fromntos (Feb 16, 2012)

I have posted on some other threads on this site, but since it's all anonymous, I figured...why not hit this topic?

When we got married, my wife was not a virgin. I was. She was extremely happy that I was, because she had changed her lifestyle from when she was in the "younger and rebellious" stage. When we got married, the sex was great, but just like a million other relationships, it slowly started to go downhill...she became uninterested. Sex was new to me. It wasn't to her. Maybe that's why it just became "whatever" to her....it's never became that to me. It's a mindset - if you're married, you choose to be sexually attracted to your spouse because you love them. I don't think that's "over-the-top" - I mean, you married them in the first place! You were attracted to them in a sexual way!

Now she's left - and it just kills me. I treated her wonderfully - told her how attractive she was, sexually, emotionally, all of it. I know I'm still younger at 26, but how freaking bad I wish I had a sexual relationship.

Sex isn't everything. I know this. But you can't deny that for a man it is a huge part. It's the old joke - "A women actually initiating the sex? How amazing would that be!"

I just find myself turned on all the time. Pornography is no good - It's empty - and it's pointless. It's not real. It's super frustrating to be a man and not feel desired. To have a wife that actually made you feel like you were something special, instead of just being like "I'm not in the mood", and that's that.

It's just bad. It would be empty (to a point anyway) to be physical with someone else at this point. Sure, it sounds wonderful. Just to be on the couch making out, being close, touching each other...it sounds fantastic! Would I really feel any better afterwords anyways? I don't want a make out partner, even though the idea sounds 100% perfect and desirable. I want a wife. Love. Commitment. 

But man - the physical closeness of a woman. Not just sex. Everything else too. The *desire* for someone. The *burning* for someone. Call me crazy, but I don't think it has to go away. I was with my wife for 6 years, and to be honest, it didn't go away, because I loved her. 

But at this stage...

Does the thought of just having someone come over tonight to make out with and all that sound good?

No.

It sounds freaking fantastic. 

Wow.

Sorry for complaining.


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## ishe? (Apr 1, 2011)

I know how you feel. I've been separated from my wh for almost three months ... I'm so horny  I have no desire for my ex but I haven't gone this long without physical intimacy since I was a teenager  

I've no suggestions really, but I guess it's normal. We're all human after all
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ishe? (Apr 1, 2011)

Those smileys were supposed to bed sad faces... I can't be bothered editing 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ishe? (Apr 1, 2011)

Have you thought of joining a dating site?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

F, 

You never really gave any specifics about your marriage. I understand you are 26. How old is your wife? Is she a student, or does she work full time? I cannot remember if you mentioned having children.

Do you know where she is? Does she ever contact you, and why has she not filed for divorce? Is she living with another man, another woman?

Your posts do alot of proselytizing, ranting and preaching, but you don't offer up alot of specifics that would allows us to help you with your problems.

That is, unless you don't want any advice and are just here to rant. 

From the little I can glean from your posts, it sounds to me like she was never in love with you the way you are in love with her. 

If she was not a virgin and had other relationships before you, then it is possible you really never knew the kind of person she actually was. She may have painted herself as someone she was not when you were dating, and could simply no longer keep up the ruse when she realized you were a hardcore Christian and that she did not share the same values to the same extent as you.


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

> Have you thought of joining a dating site?


He is still married and a devout Christian. I don't think dating is in the cards for him right now.


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