# Baby I need some feedback



## cam2468 (Feb 3, 2009)

Our marriage lasted two and a half years. The two years we lived together there were many tense moments with the dynamics of a new family. Both my wife and I had been married before and her son was not an issue for me. The issues were many such as falling asleep in his bed at night ( he was thirteen ) and then urinating with the bathroom door open or infront of him while he was cleaning his teeth. 

Our sex life was healthy and my wife liked to play games which I was okay about. The relationship between her son and my wife was questionable, as I think that certain things are not healthy or normal. I would ask her about these actions, only to be told to relax and not to be so judgemental or critical.

In July last year I witnessed my wife enter the bathroom where my stepson was taking a bath and then urinate in the toilet ( I did not see this act ). When she came out from the bathroom I asked her what she had been doing in the bathroom seeing that her son was in there, and the response was that she needed to go to the toilet as if this was acceptable.

I left the marriage in December and the locks were changed. I now have an angry, bitter wife who has filed for divorce. I feel sorry for her as I do not think that she is a happy well adjusted camper and wanted to get some feedback on these and other matters. 

I am no saint as I am but a mere mortal male but I think that certain things are just not acceptable.

I would really like to hear what any women think about this.

Please give me some feedback.


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## jkg (Feb 4, 2009)

I agree. I'm 21 and my own mother is wierd like that. I don't think it's appropriate in any way even if her child was a girl I don't think it would be ok. I hope that you told her if it didn't stop you'd end it before you actually did but I think you did the right thing.


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

I dunno, I guess ti is just how you are raised.

we are perfectly fine with being naked around our children and are children are fine being naked around us.

My kids are still on the young side, 11,9,and 6.

I want them to be comfortable in their own skin and also understand the models they see on TV and magazines are not your average persons body.

Our daughter who is 11 and she likes to use our bathroom in our bedroom over the hallway bathroom, she never closes the door, because we never do. They know outside of family or if we have guests they have to close the door when using the bathroom.

I guess it just depends on what you are used to and how you are raised.

I personally find nothing wrong with her actions.


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## onlylonelyone (Jan 26, 2009)

If it makes the kids uncomfortable then yes she should stop. I personally think it's just a private thing and should be done alone. I also have kids and until my son was 7-8 he didn't mind busting in the bathroom if I was putting on makeup or whatever to use the bathroom. Mom's are used to kids coming in the bathroom when Mom's are using it, lol.....As your kids grow, you see them become more private about getting dressed, etc....That is a cue to give them privacy and a good bet they don't want to watch you use the bathroom or see you roam around naked anymore. My daughter is 8 and she is private but still thinks it's funny to watch me put on a bra. I think because she is getting excited about wearing one more than anything, lol. I don't think it is a reason to leave a spouse but I am sure there was more to it than that.


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## swedish (Mar 6, 2008)

I have always been private that way, but I agree with GASoccerman that much of it depends on how you were raised.


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## cam2468 (Feb 3, 2009)

Thanks for your comment and I did not think that this was a healthy way to act. All the best.


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## cam2468 (Feb 3, 2009)

Thanks for your comments and each to their own. All the best.


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## cam2468 (Feb 3, 2009)

Thanks for your comments and yes there was more to it than that.

All the best.


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## dcrim (Oct 1, 2008)

The only times I closed the door was when we had guests or when I was in the bathroom "reading" (BM). My kids were never taught that their bodies are something to be ashamed of but that at times it's not cool for "just everyone" to see you in the bathroom (for whatever purpose). We didn't run around the house nude, but didn't cover much if we had to dash around for something. We all shared the room when and as needed until the kids naturally grew up enough to want some privacy. After that, I still didn't always close the door, but they quit sharing and I then knocked before entering.


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## Sprite (Nov 3, 2008)

I too believe it is all in how you are raised. I wanted my kids to know what a womans body looks like, so WHEN THEY WERE LITTLE...we did shared the bathroom a lot. But, it was not an open door policy. I wanted them to be secure in the way they looked and to know that it is NOT shamefull to have a less than perfect body. It worked, because now that they are teenagers, they simply don't really care how they look to others. BUT...AT 13??? no way. At that point, they got the education they needed, and the self confidence....but at that age, they now need to learn respect and privacy. Can someone teach that to my husband? he has VERY bad habit of......the door to the bathroom is closed, so he knows someone is in there..he knocks...but NEVER waits for a reply, he simply walks right in....UGH...annoying to no end. I critisise him for this EVERY TIME he does it, but to no avail. And yes...I dont care what anyone tells me, I will KEEP nagging at him about htis until he gets it....this is not acceptable behavior by anyone!!

I think it is also a personal preferance kind of thing...some people it bothers immensly...others don't care.

I also don't think it is a reason to leave a marriage unless there is more going on that meets the eye....in which case you should take it upon yourself to call social services..or call your wife out on it. Have you completely and openly told her how you felt about the situation? Did she ever understand your point of view totally? Did you discuss it or did you simply try telling her how things should be in your eyes?

I dont mean to sound so critical, and I dont mean to bash you if that is how you are feeling. To be totally honest, I think you are a little disgruntled that the post didn't go the way you wanted it to. I hope this does not mean you have a closed mind.

Let me ask you this....Is there only one bathroom in the house? If that is the case, then sometimes it just can't be held until someone gets out of the tub.


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## MsLady (Dec 1, 2008)

Well, I don't think what you described is enough to leave someone for. It really depends on upbringing and the boy's maturity level and comfort level, etc.

But, as you say there was more to it than that, then only you really know what was going on there.


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

to touch further on this...

I hurt my back and I am very gingerly, so I been in bed all day sleeping resting, etc.

Anyway my wife woke me up accidently and our 6 year old son was in the room with my wife. 

I got out of the bed naked and hobbled to the bathroom to go potty and go back to bed.

My 6 year old son saw me naked, and said "eww, Mommy clothes your eyes, don't look" LOL I said, "thanks dilly"

My wife couldn't help but laugh....


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## Sprite (Nov 3, 2008)

lmao..thats great! 

Sounds to me he has been taught well. It is a private thing, but nothing to be too worried about.


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