# I suspected before but now I know.



## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

We have been together for 15 years, married for 9. We have 2 beautiful boys. I live in Texas. I had got a new job 7 years ago and we moved to a big city. I found out that my job was a "relief" position and i would have to travel all over the state. She traveled with me the first 2 years with our oldest. when it was time for him to goto school she wanted to move in with her family in Mexico so they could help her. I agreed. along the way we had another child. i noticed her childhood "friend" was spending a lot of time at her house. she told me he was interested in her sister. I thought that was odd because her sister always seemed more interested in women. her friend is even the godfather of our youngest child. over the years i've noticed that when she was with me she was always chatting or texting him but deleting afterwards. I would confront her and she would get mad and say they've been friends for long time and she was tired of me checking on her. i finally got stationed permanent in the big city and she was mad. she wanted me to stay on road because i got little extra pay (travel overtime per diam) her mother got really sick and she said that she needed to stay in MX to take care of her. I had no problem with that. after her mother passed away she said that she couldn't leave her dad alone even though she had a sister and brother there that could take care of him. I've been alone in the city for over 2yrs now and she refuses to move here. she will come and visit on pay weeks. i have $500 out of every check got to her account.(i get paid every 2 weeks) every time we are together she stays on my phone making calls to mx and using fb. about a week after she left i noticed that she didn't log out of the fb messager so i looked. she had sent a message to a lady telling her to leave her friend alone that she has had a relationship with him for 5 years and she loves him with all her heart & soul. i was devastated. i haven't confronted her yet i want to get an attorney first. he is a detective in mx and has shootouts with the cartels over there. my only vehicle running i let her have so she could get the boys to school. i work 10 hrs a day ride a bus back and forth to work.i don't get to see my boys as much as i want and when she calls me she is never with the boys so we can talk. when she does let me talk to them its always on speaker so she can listen. the boys both say they want to live with me and on last visit my oldest asked my "why did i marry her?" i fear for my boys safety but she is always needing more and more money. she has pawned all of my boys christmas gifts from the past few years. the boys have told me they want to live with me and told her too. she told the boys if they lived with me she would kill herself. she has pulled a knife on me and my boys preventing us from leaving. there is more but this post is already too long.


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

i have made copies of the messages and she tells her friends that the om is good with my boys and gives her money to buy stuff. my oldest tells me that he is always at their home and sometimes pretends to leave and comes back. he has even told me that the om is there sometimes when he gets up in the morning. Can I use these chat records in court against her? Will it help me win custody? I also learned that they no longer have running water in the house. i've been making screenshots of all i find. it is on MY phone and she forgot to log out i did not hack it.


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## totallyunexpected (Nov 21, 2012)

Hurt Dad said:


> i fear for my boys safety but she is always needing more and more money. she has pawned all of my boys christmas gifts from the past few years. the boys have told me they want to live with me and told her too. she told the boys if they lived with me she would kill herself. she has pulled a knife on me and my boys preventing us from leaving. there is more but this post is already too long.


Wow, this sounds like a horrible arrangement, both for you and your boys. From what you have written, even if there were no cheating it sounds like your marriage is more damaging than fulfilling to all parties involved. She pulled a knife on you AND YOUR BOYS. That is not okay and is reason enough for you to get the kids as quickly as possible to the US. She does not sound mentally stable and I would very much worry for your children's safety.

I know you are feeling heartbroken because of what you have recently learned. However, I think it is best in this situation NOT TO CONFRONT yet because you really need to protect your kids and who knows what she would do if she found out you "knew." Do not do not let her know that you know. Get your kids with you first, and obviously speak with a lawyer straight away. You are already planning to do this - good.

I am really sorry to hear about what hell your "wife" has put you through. Perhaps this is a blessing in disguise, in that it may be the catalyst for change, for getting out of a toxic relationship and abusive situation. 

Your boys need you to be strong. Hang in there, and do not let her know that you know until you have secured your interests and boys' safety. Share more of your story and potential plans of action. When will you see your boys next?


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## MovingAhead (Dec 27, 2012)

Brother, I am sorry you are here...

Gather all the evidence you can. You most likely can use them in court in some way.

You have to look at the child custody laws of where you live. Is it TX or Mexico. It really matters.

The judge will decide what is BEST for the children. If she is taking care of the children, you need to insert yourself as a caregiver if not the primary caregiver ASAP.

Rulings for children don't really consider adultery into the equation, but it's state by state. Get a lawyer's advice ASAP!

Do not confront her until you have decided what you want to do... It will tip her off and it will make it much harder for you.

1. Get a lawyer and get advice quickly!
2. Be active in kids life as much as possible!
3. Prepare to separate finances and look at the 180.

I am very sorry you are here brother. This is a start! Do NOT wait on the lawyer!


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## totallyunexpected (Nov 21, 2012)

Hurt Dad said:


> i have made copies of the messages and she tells her friends that the om is good with my boys and gives her money to buy stuff. my oldest tells me that he is always at their home and sometimes pretends to leave and comes back. he has even told me that the om is there sometimes when he gets up in the morning. Can I use these chat records in court against her? Will it help me win custody? I also learned that they no longer have running water in the house. i've been making screenshots of all i find. it is on MY phone and she forgot to log out i did not hack it.


Sounds like you are acting with your head and not just your heart - good. Yes get all evidence you can. Make sure your kids don't let her know that you know. Also, speak with a lawyer ASAP. TAM is great for support, but you really need a lawyer to answer these questions. Your case is particularly complicated in that you are dealing with a custody battle that involves two countries. Best of luck Hurt Dad.


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

I was planning to keep them for the summer but i saw in her chats that she doesn't wast that. also i found that she is planning to cheat on the om with a friend in Dallas that is married. they plan a night of drinking and"dancing" she also ask the oom if he could get her a .38 special. that really scares me. she is very unstable and i have some vioce recordings of this but i don't think i have any of her suicide threats. she has mentioned in her chats that she is very much in love with the om but can't be good with him because of me. he wants to marry her. i don't go into mx anymore because violence against americans can be easily explained as cartel or i could just disappear. I hasve read that in TX if the affair is done in front of the children then that can be used.


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## mablenc (Feb 26, 2013)

Sorry you are here, are you sure the kids are yours?
If not DNA test, I see something off I can't really tell but based on what you write about money, is she a drug user or involved in any way with the drug cartels or something similar? Something is keeping her in Mexico I understand wanting to be near family but right now it's so bad that she would run here. Is she married to that guy? Is that possible? 

If she has pulled a knife on you and the kids why in the world have you left them there? You need to handle the situation in the US that you can get a retraining order aginst her.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

i live in TX. i am the only one working. i send 500 of every check to her to the point that sometimes she'll get more than me i send extra because she uses my boys to get it (no food no clothes) i regularly overdraft my account just to get my bills paid.


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## MovingAhead (Dec 27, 2012)

Hurt Dad said:


> i live in TX. i am the only one working. i send 500 of every check to her to the point that sometimes she'll get more than me i send extra because she uses my boys to get it (no food no clothes) i regularly overdraft my account just to get my bills paid.


Where do your boys live? Mexico? That is an issue. Talk to a lawyer and see what you need to do. Any witnesses to the knife pulling?

Kids in general cannot testify in court for child custody hearings and expect her to lie through her teeth...

Lawyer! Now!


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

she pulled the knife here in us because i took the boys for xmas and canceled her check. but she got a ride up here and was beating on my door. i caved and let her in. i did not know everything then. i had told my boy to call 911 but she put down the knife and i told him to hangup the phone. the thing keeping her in mx is the om. she sees him like she used to see me and is obsessive over him. and very jealous of him.


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

only me and the boys were there i regret now not letting him make the call.
i have an appointment to see a lawyer thursday. i need to check others but this one is near where i live.


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## mablenc (Feb 26, 2013)

You are only an ATM for her now. Please get your kids away its never ok to pull a knife out to hurt them or herself. Do you understand the trauma she is causing them? They will have a hard life adjusting as adults
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## MovingAhead (Dec 27, 2012)

Probably need to move and have a restraining order from her... You really need to talk to a lawyer. Your situation is tough because of the TX/MX issue...

Be careful too. There is the law and there are other things the law doesn't handle. God bless you brother!


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

thank you all. she tells me she wants to work it out but moving here is not an option i asked her if she wanted me to quit my job and move there she said no its a good job. all the long she chats that she is getting divorced. i know now she is just leading me along but my eyes are open. i am hurt but i've when i get my boys i will be ok. she chatted to a friend that i suspected she was with the om the she said (translated from spanish) "it's good that he's not too lost".


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

she claims that she lives in us at an aunts house so the boys can go to school.


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

i've have talked to the oldest (he is so smart) about how she is and that she is sick. she regularly curses out my boys in spanish when she is mad.even when they were todlers. when i told her ididn't approve she said she didn't care.


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## Overthemoon88 (Jan 10, 2013)

HDad, do your boys hold an American passport or a Mexican one ?

Any chance for you, when your kids are on American soil next, to apply for a temporary injunction to prevent them from being taken out of the country ???

I have just kickstarted my D procedures. Me and my STBXH are of different nationalities and his LTA paramour is in a 3rd country. I expect it won't be plain sailing for me. Be prepared for the amount of paper work. Be strong for your boys. It sounds as if they love you LOTS.

See a lawyer ... Like yesterday ! Start putting aside bit-by-bit $$$ for legal bills. Seek support from your own family.

Good luck.


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## FormerSelf (Apr 21, 2013)

Dude...she sound totally messed up in the head...like some major past trauma. She is dangerous for you and the kids. The day you win custody of the kids...you may need to change names and your home...she sound very retributive...and is a real loose cannon. I'd be scared just to go down there. If you have a life insurance policy that she could benefit from...cancel it bro. Seriously, she is all about survival and getting what she wants which sounds like a bunch of guys all supporting her.


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

My boys and I both have passport cards she does not. She was denied and revived a letter stating that the person that filed her birth certificate was suspected of filing fraudulate certificates. I don't have the orignal letter but I do have copies that she had sent me when she first go the letter. She crosses the border with her dl and birth certificate and the boys pass cards.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

I thought that you had to have a passport to enter the US from all countries.


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

You can use an enhanced dl or ID but I don't think tx has it. I think they let her cross for the boys but I'm not for sure.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## KimatraAKM (May 1, 2013)

Hurt Dad said:


> You can use an enhanced dl or ID but I don't think tx has it. I think they let her cross for the boys but I'm not for sure.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


See a lawyer and get done paperwork setup. Then take the boys. Get their passports too. If you have to, lie about needing them for awhile. Maybe you want to take then to visit their grandparents or it's summer and you want to take them to "blah".. If you involve other people in the lie (visiting grandparents, taking then to the zoo with aunt/uncle, setting them up a college fun that they need to be present o setup) it's harder for her to say no. Theb just never give em back until after court and divorce. 

Course only do what the lawyer tells ya..


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## Overthemoon88 (Jan 10, 2013)

A special arrangement for border states with Mexico ???

I really think you should find a way to prevent the boys from being taken out of the States again.

In my case, the father hasn't discussed visitation and access yet ... The effing coward must be in hiding ... If he does, I will have to tell him that access will only be granted after I file for an injunction to prevent my son to be taken out of the country. Not that I forsee parental abduction. But to be on the cautious side.


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

She says she needs gall bladder surgery. I told her to hurry up and make an appointment and I'll go down and watch the boys. I think she wants me to bring them up here. She might try to get it done in MX. But we don't have money to pay. I have good insurance but she prefers drs in MX.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## KimatraAKM (May 1, 2013)

Hurt Dad said:


> She says she needs gall bladder surgery. I told her to hurry up and make an appointment and I'll go down and watch the boys. I think she wants me to bring them up here. She might try to get it done in MX. But we don't have money to pay. I have good insurance but she prefers drs in MX.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Perfect! Offer to watch the boys while she recovers and then don't give em back and assure you have heir passports an your paperwork in order. Then file a restraining order..


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## alte Dame (Aug 7, 2012)

Make nice with her for the moment to get your boys with you in TX immediately. This is priority number one. Once they are with you, start your official legal proceedings. If the children are resident in your state, that is their country of residence for the purposes of international custody considerations. Get them to you asap and keep them there.


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## FormerSelf (Apr 21, 2013)

:iagree:
Yes all of this...plus compile all of your proof concerning her infidelity...and if she starts kicking off..start sending proof of OOM to OM...or OM to OOM. Or if they don't know, send proof of OM + OOM to her family. At you discretion of course, don't wanna see anyone get killed.


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## Machiavelli (Feb 25, 2012)

Hurt Dad said:


> She says she needs gall bladder surgery. I told her to hurry up and make an appointment and I'll go down and watch the boys. I think she wants me to bring them up here. She might try to get it done in MX. But we don't have money to pay. I have good insurance but she prefers drs in MX.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


She can't take them in to Mexico without notarized permission from you. Bring them up while she's having the surgery, then move to a new place and don't give her the address. You need to get them on this side of the river and keep them here. Get your divorce underway.

How old are your kids?


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

My boys are 8 and 5 both will have birthdays at end of the year. Was chatting with my wife she was asking for money saying her and the boys are hungry. I told her I didnt have any. While she was chatting me she was also chatting oom. Flirting with him and telling him she will go to Dallas about middle of next month.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## tom67 (Oct 2, 2012)

Well, let the om pay if she wants him so bad.


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

She knows my boys are my weakness. And she uses them. It hurts so bad thinking that they might be hungry but she got $500 Saturday and it is gone? She says she has to pay all the pawned items. And pay back money she borrows.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Machiavelli (Feb 25, 2012)

Hurt Dad said:


> My boys are 8 and 5 both will have birthdays at end of the year. Was chatting with my wife she was asking for money saying her and the boys are hungry. I told her I didnt have any. While she was chatting me she was also chatting oom. Flirting with him and telling him she will go to Dallas about middle of next month.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Surely you don't have the oldest in Mexican public schools?

Get your plan together with your attorney for when she shows up with the kids next month. You must stop them from being taken back to Mexico.


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## crossbar (Aug 25, 2011)

Dude, $500 in MX goes a hellva long way. What the hell is she doing with that money?


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## Jonesey (Jul 11, 2011)

alte Dame said:


> Make nice with her for the moment to get your boys with you in TX immediately. This is priority number one. *Once they are with you, start your official legal proceedings. If the children are resident in your state, that is their country of residence for the purposes of international custody considerations.* Get them to you asap and keep them there.



Here is where you can read up on it.

The *Hague Convention on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction,* or *Hague Abduction Convention* is a multilateral treaty developed by the Hague Conference on Private International Law that provides an expeditious method to return a child internationally abducted by a parent from one member nation to another. Proceedings on the Convention concluded 25 October 1980 and the Convention entered into force between the signatory nations on 1 December 1983. The Convention was drafted to ensure the prompt return of children who have been abducted from their country of habitual residence or wrongfully retained in a contracting state not their country of habitual residence.[1]
The primary intention of the Convention is to preserve whatever status quo child custody arrangement existed immediately before an alleged wrongful removal or retention thereby deterring a parent from crossing international boundaries in search of a more sympathetic court. The Convention applies only to children under the age of 16.
As of May 2013, 89 States are party to the convention.[2] In 2012, the treaty entered in force in Guinea and Lesotho. The treaty entered into force for South Korea on 1 March 2013.


Hague Convention on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia






You will find additional link´s to the office in Hague which is located in Netherlands´s. This treaty actually work´s beleve it or not. There have been several cases where i´m from 
where the kid/kid´s have been safely returned to the country of origin..It can take some time.I´m sure you know government´s are exactly the fastest kid´s on the block.

Ps

Email your state department and ask them for more info. And perhaps even ask for some references(Layer´s,Case studies and so on) to successfully cases.Just in case it come´s to that.


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## Overthemoon88 (Jan 10, 2013)

In addition to Jonesey's above, read these, HDad :

The I CARE Foundation : Summer Vacations And International Parental Child Abduction Warning Signs

International Parental Child Abduction Mexico

http://haguemexico.com/

http://www.fbi.gov/wanted/parent


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

Thank you she has threatened in the past to disappear into MX. But she is not a Mexican citizen or that's what she told me. She wants to get dual citizenship. The wanted to go deeper into MX and use her sisters papers to do it. She has family in and around Monterey MX. She lives in matamoros MX.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Jonesey (Jul 11, 2011)

Hurt Dad said:


> Thank you she has threatened in the past to disappear into MX. But she is not a Mexican citizen or that's what she told me. She wants to get dual citizenship. The wanted to go deeper into MX and use her sisters papers to do it. She has family in and around Monterey MX. She lives in matamoros MX.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Dang you seem to have a lot of dirt on her. Did i hear anyone
say FBI???


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## Overthemoon88 (Jan 10, 2013)

What nationality is she then, if not Mexican ??? Pardon me for saying this but you sound as if you married quite a dodgy character !

P.s. ooooops, I didn't fare too well myself either


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## Machiavelli (Feb 25, 2012)

Hurt Dad said:


> Thank you she has threatened in the past to disappear into MX. But she is not a Mexican citizen or that's what she told me. She wants to get dual citizenship. The wanted to go deeper into MX and use her sisters papers to do it. She has family in and around Monterey MX. She lives in matamoros MX.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


So, all the more reason to act decisively now.


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## crossbar (Aug 25, 2011)

Matamoros? Dude, that's literally right on the border! You could take a jog across the border and jog with the kids back!


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

I'm worried her P.M.E. om will have me locked up in MX. You know how it is.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

Hurt Dad.

What do you mean by "P.M.E"? Also it sounds like you got into a bad position with this situation. I'm not sure if it can ever workout the way you thought you wanted it to, because I think she was taking advantage of your kindness from the start. Also she has OM's in your situation with leverage. Not good.


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

Sorry it's P.M.F. Maybe. They're called Policía Ministerial.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## alte Dame (Aug 7, 2012)

Play nice with her to get her over the border to you with the kids. Money is important to her. Use it to get her there. Plan it out and execute the plan. Once the kids are with you, don't let them leave. Go to a lawyer and make it official that TX is their legal residence.


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

she uses her aunts address to keep them in us school. i know she'll come over for money but might leave them over there. her plan is to bring them to me and leave them and take the vehicle to dallas to see oom. I need to get kids and vehicle.


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## lovely2011 (May 28, 2013)

Hello, my advice for you, just like everybody else, GET A LAWYER! That's your first step and get one ASAP. Leave aside the fact that she doesn't want to live with you or the fact that she's pretty much with another man, take in effect of what she is doing to your boys. Especially if she has to monitor their conversations with you, that means that there is something to hide. Get them back to you safely. No loving wife would want their husband to travel for more money, it just doesn't happen. Take your boys while they are unharmed and stand up for what you have created. Stop giving her money, obviously she is not using it for your children. Tell her you need it for whatever but don't and I repeat don't give her money! Get a lawyer, forget everything else!!! Also as for your vehicle, what you can actually do is just tell her you're taking the boys somewhere for a "guys day" but in the mean time have your plan ready with the lawyers while she is here. From then on, tell her you guys are going somewhere, go to a safe place for you and the boys and start with the process. As long as you do not have her catch on to what you are doing, you should be safe. Also as I said, have the plan ready to go with your lawyers as soon as she enters the country!!!


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

Just got back from lawyer. He says i got real good case. First and foremost GET THE BOYS. play dumb until she brings them to me then have my mom take them with her and serve her right then or when she gets back from the ons he would prefer to server her as soon as she drops off the boys, but if i have to let her take my vehicle and go screw some guy then ok as long as i get the boys. the price was steep but he was willing to work with me. but he was just the first, will check with others.


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## alte Dame (Aug 7, 2012)

This is great news!

Yes, focus first on getting your sons out of her hands. You can do it. It doesn't sound like she has any idea that you are starting to think differently, so use that to your advantage. Definitely play dumb and get those kids.


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

Thanks everyone for your support. Y'all have been a great help, not only in advice but in lifting up my hopes and spirit. 
THANK YOU 
HD


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## mablenc (Feb 26, 2013)

Good luck, by the way she can disappear deep into Mexico it's not like the US, just letting you know. I don't how she can come to the US without a passport they let you cross back once then they fine you $500.

Im not sure i believe her fraudulent birth certificate story, are you sure she's a US citizen and not an illegal? Some parents bring their children very young and make them believe they are born here, then they get the truth when they try use the fake documents mom and dad gave them.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

If only you could let the OM know with proof that she had the ONS. He'd dump her for cheating on him,


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

She has a miniature laminated copy of her birth certificate I have seen it. She was an anchor baby. Supposedly born here but lived most her life in MX. I have screen grabs of her talking to the oom very suggestive. But she knows how to put spin on any story. She had me doubting my gut feeling for long time. I can't wait to get some funds together and serve her after I get my boys. All I care about is that they're safe. they can have each other. It will be his problem not mine.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## LetDownNTX (Oct 4, 2012)

crossbar said:


> Matamoros? Dude, that's literally right on the border! You could take a jog across the border and jog with the kids back!


That was exactly my thought. I walked across ONCE, had a coke and nearly got killed. Havent been back!


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## Machiavelli (Feb 25, 2012)

LetDownNTX said:


> That was exactly my thought. I walked across ONCE, had a coke and nearly got killed. Havent been back!


That must have been back when it was safe.


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## Dyokemm (Apr 24, 2013)

Hurt Dad,

Sorry you have to go through this.

Stories here at CWI, especially ones like yours, just make me shake my head in disbelief.

I consider myself a highly educated man. Grad of the U.S. Naval Academy, instructor at a local community college, widely read, etc.

And for the life of me, I cannot fathom in any possible way the mind-numbing stupidity some people display in their life choices.


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## BrockLanders (Jul 23, 2012)

You need an American lawyer and a Mexican one. Get the most connected abogado wherever she lives in Mexico, maybe also a Mexican PI who can show she doesn't spend time with the boys. Do you have any sort of citizenship or residency status there?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

Everything is set. Will be serving her the papers Saturday after the kids are off the property and safe. Only problem she might show up Friday. She wants to drop off kids and goto Dallas I think. I have filed protective orders. She has told her friends that she has to choose between duty and desire. Apparently her ons with the oom has been canceled because he is sancho to her friend. I know it will be a mess when she is served but I have informed the property management of the situation and they will help if needed.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

Hurt Dad said:


> Everything is set. Will be serving her the papers Saturday after the kids are off the property and safe. Only problem she might show up Friday. She wants to drop off kids and goto Dallas I think. I have filed protective orders. She has told her friends that she has to choose between duty and desire. Apparently her ons with the oom has been canceled because he is sancho to her friend. I know it will be a mess when she is served but I have informed the property management of the situation and they will help if needed.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


"Choose between 'duty' and 'desire'" first time I heard that one. Sounds like she is in the moment and kicking off great one liners that would be catching on a reality TV segment.


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

That's my rough translation. She said "de q no se que hacer el deber y el querer"
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Acabado (May 13, 2012)

Hurt Dad said:


> That's my rough translation. She said "de q no se que hacer el deber y el querer"
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


That was an accurate translation.

But it's all a show towards her friend, given she never chose duty, she has basicaly using you as a meal ticket while leading a double life, for years. And she's neglecting their kids so much they are asking you to life with so, so much for motherly duties. She's trying to gaslights her own friend, pretending, saving face. After many years of doing so she has probably brainwashed herself too into believe that as long as she can keep it secret she's actually doing el deber.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

Acabado said:


> That was an accurate translation.
> 
> But it's all a show towards her friend, given she never chose duty, she has basicaly using you as a meal ticket while leading a double life, for years. And she's neglecting their kids so much they are asking you to life with so, so much for motherly duties. She's trying to gaslights her own friend, pretending, saving face. After many years of doing so she has probably brainwashed herself too into believe that as long as she can keep it secret she's actually doing el deber.


LOL, you nailed it.


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## hookares (Dec 7, 2011)

Hurt Dad, get a paternity test run for BOTH of your children before you decide how you want to end this sham marriage. If she is living in Mexico and your (?) kids are American citizens, you should have no problem in getting a court order of protection for both you and the children and get it set up so SHE is the one who is begging to visit.
If the guy who is cuking you is a Mexican cop, he may well be on the take and can get away with putting a bullet between your eyes anytime you are down there.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

hookares said:


> Hurt Dad, get a paternity test run for BOTH of your children before you decide how you want to end this sham marriage. If she is living in Mexico and your (?) kids are American citizens, you should have no problem in getting a court order of protection for both you and the children and get it set up so SHE is the one who is begging to visit.
> If the guy who is cuking you is a Mexican cop, he may well be on the take and can get away with putting a bullet between your eyes anytime you are down there.


You know what I'm saying....

I've been telling people for years that Sanchos and OM's are usually some real scummy characters. They will get into your business and mess your life up. They can kill your wife, or just use her for sex and screw her brains out till she's stupid. I believe in taking proactive action on these individuals. Better yet, pick a relationship partner who knows what comes with the territory when you cheat - and just wont do it.


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## dusty4 (May 8, 2013)

> the boys have told me they want to live with me and told her too. she told the boys if they lived with me she would kill herself. she has pulled a knife on me and my boys preventing us from leaving.



Fathers get the shaft with regards to being the custodial parent. But in this case you can get them, especially if they want to live with you.

Document everything her crazy ass says and does. And do not worry about her threats of killing herself if they don't live with her. Sorry to say, thats not your problem.


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## dusty4 (May 8, 2013)

Hurt Dad said:


> Just got back from lawyer. He says i got real good case. First and foremost GET THE BOYS. play dumb until she brings them to me then have my mom take them with her and serve her right then or when she gets back from the ons he would prefer to server her as soon as she drops off the boys, but if i have to let her take my vehicle and go screw some guy then ok as long as i get the boys. the price was steep but he was willing to work with me. but he was just the first, will check with others.


Good going. Do EVERYTHING your attorney tells you to do. Follow his word as gospel. Thats what you are paying him for.


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

Got my boys and she got car. Good thing we got a great bus system here. Boys are happy and healthy. She calls and harasses me and beggs forgiveness for her "mistake". She tells all her friends and family how I was so bad in taking them but doesn't mention why I took them. Court date the 19th. Can't wait to make the custody official. Thanks everyone for your support.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Acabado (May 13, 2012)

Stay focused, vigilant, watch her moves.


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## alte Dame (Aug 7, 2012)

Good luck! Stay strong and keep those boys close.


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## Machiavelli (Feb 25, 2012)

Hurt Dad said:


> She tells all her friends and family how I was so bad in taking them but doesn't mention why I took them.


That's because you were the last to know. They all knew already. Besides, you're a ****** aren't you?


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## jack.c (Sep 7, 2013)

wonder how this story ended?.....


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## ShootMePlz! (Oct 5, 2008)

With the words....THE END!!!!


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## GROUNDPOUNDER (Mar 8, 2013)

El Fin.


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## Numbersixxx (Oct 10, 2012)

They lived happily ever after
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Hurt Dad (May 29, 2013)

UPDATE...

I'm sorry I haven't posted in a while. I won my case! after several postponements finally got a hearing. She has been trying to get back with me while living with her om. I have moved on and now dating a wonderful woman that my boys love. She understands that they will always be first. I'm taking it slow and doing everything I can for my boys. Thank you everyone for the support.


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Hurt Dad said:


> UPDATE...
> 
> I'm sorry I haven't posted in a while. I won my case! after several postponements finally got a hearing. *She has been trying to get back with me while living with her om*. I have moved on and now dating a wonderful woman that my boys love. She understands that they will always be first. I'm taking it slow and doing everything I can for my boys. Thank you everyone for the support.


So typical. And probably trashing you to the OM every chance she gets.


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## jim123 (Sep 29, 2012)

Hurt Dad said:


> UPDATE...
> 
> I'm sorry I haven't posted in a while. I won my case! after several postponements finally got a hearing. She has been trying to get back with me while living with her om. I have moved on and now dating a wonderful woman that my boys love. She understands that they will always be first. I'm taking it slow and doing everything I can for my boys. Thank you everyone for the support.


Stay the course. Your kids will be far better off and so will you.


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## Mr Blunt (Jul 18, 2012)

Sorry your ex-wife choose to betray you and her own children. You are an encourager because you are rebuilding your life quite nicely.

Your wife/GF may not always be your wife/GF but your boys will always be your boys! You seem to have a good head on your sholders. You have your priorities in the right order.
Thanks for the update and encouragment!


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