# Anniversaries are Hard - Suggestions?



## bravenewworld (Mar 24, 2013)

Been feeling a bit down - separated a year and my anniversary is coming up. It's really getting to me. I am sad and stressed. My hair is falling out. :scratchhead:

I would like to do something fun on the actual day. Any suggestions? No massage or spa time, not really feeling like being touched as of late.


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## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

bravenewworld said:


> Been feeling a bit down - separated a year and my anniversary is coming up. It's really getting to me. I am sad and stressed. My hair is falling out. :scratchhead:
> 
> I would like to do something fun on the actual day. Any suggestions? No massage or spa time, not really feeling like being touched as of late.


I can relate. It was like two days after I found out the affair that was our 8 year anniversary. We were already divorcing but me being on board with that was only two days old. Had no single friends to hang out with and I was miserable. I went to dinner by myself and then to a movie which I left 1/2 way through cause I realized I hadn't been watching it only thinking. 

My suggestion is if you can go spend it with someone if you can...friend or family. This does get easier.


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## Damselfish (May 21, 2010)

Brave,

I wish I had something amazing to tell you, but I don't. But I did find this. Hope helps a little.

Liberated: The First Post-Divorce Wedding Anniversary | Carless In Seattle

Congratulations on your weight loss! You're doing awesome

Cyber hug,

DF


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## Nikita2270 (Mar 22, 2014)

lol...I was married for over 20 years and I just had to spend the last 3 minutes trying to remember what date my marriage anniversary actually was. I'm had a miserable marriage, its over and I'm divorced. Happiness is a choice I make every day.

Live in the present...enjoy life...you only get one. Dwelling on the past is a choice you're making. If you want to, you can focus your energy elsewhere.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*Let's just say that after marriages of 13 and 9-1/2 years, respectively, that both of my anniversary dates are now totally meaningless and dead to me!*


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## Fenix (Jul 2, 2013)

I hear you, BNW. I 'celebrated' my 25th in Dec and had been separated for 7ish months. I did a long coffee with some girlfriends and we did a FU pic that I could have sent him, but didn't. I have it as my screensaver though as I look damn good in it! 

Stay busy. Do not sit home and dwell.


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## zillard (Nov 13, 2012)

Fenix said:


> Stay busy. Do not sit home and dwell.


Bingo. If you know the upcoming day will be hard for you, find some ways to treat yourself and have fun, or get something done that you've been putting off. For me, the sense of accomplishment helps, especially if I have no company. 

But it's also important not to bottle the feelings. If they are strong, acknowledge them. Let yourself feel them. And let them out. 

If you don't purge, a slow trickle will last much longer.


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## ne9907 (Jul 17, 2013)

I am a person who enjoys solitute.

I would go to the beach and camp out. Watch the sunset, build a fire, then watch the stars begin to appear one by one.

In the infinity of the universe and the ocean, you will find that our problems are just minute in the grand scheme of things and YET we are still important.
We are living cells created by a magnificent being, we are unique, we are our own creators of our destiny.

Let go of the past, let go of the hurt, become one with you, God, and the universe.


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