# Do you discuss sex with your friends?



## FloridaGuy1 (Nov 4, 2019)

We discuss some pretty detailed sexual items here. Do you discuss the same level with your friends?

I don't as my group of guy friends will say things like "their wife doesn't want sex" or we will make jokes like a friend may not get laid after he forgets flowers or something for a special day but we never go into details like the discussions here even though we all have known each other for 40+ years.

How about you and your friends?


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## Hiner112 (Nov 17, 2019)

Among my group of friends there was some happiness or celebration when I entered into my first sexual relationship since I was the last virgin in the group by a number of years. My brother has laughed about how the doctor has warned him that smoking could affect erectile function and how he's like a teenager most of the time. A friend of mine talked about his sexcapades when he went on a foreign vacation. When I was in the Marines it was understood that most of the lunch break was _not_ spent eating food if you were married and people would make fun of the fact that you'd come back to work from the lunch hour to eat lunch. One of the Marines was previously stationed in Okinawa and apparently their barracks had a set of local groupies. That details pretty much all of the sexual discussions I've had with friends.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Only the good things and never the details.


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

I don't discuss sex with the majority of my friends (male and female), aside from an occasional joke or remark, although there is one close couple where a little more detail was talked about. I have a couple of female friends where we mostly discuss _their_ sex life and dating advice. And I have a couple of other female friends where we discussed sex in detail because we were having sex.


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## NTA (Mar 28, 2021)

I definitely don't talk about sex with friends. And now that there is a variety of message boards to chew the fat with, I talk less about personal issues with friends.

I was really amazed that when I was trying to make sense about OSFs, all of my friends told me, well, my husband doesn't have any female friends. No one did.


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## DudeInProgress (Jun 10, 2019)

FloridaGuy1 said:


> We discuss some pretty detailed sexual items here. Do you discuss the same level with your friends?
> 
> I don't as my group of guy friends will say things like "their wife doesn't want sex" or we will make jokes like a friend may not get laid after he forgets flowers or something for a special day but we never go into details like the discussions here even though we all have known each other for 40+ years.
> 
> How about you and your friends?


Same


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## Chaotic (Jul 6, 2013)

I have a close friend (female, as am I) who I've known for over 25 years. When we were in our twenties we talked about sex a lot, and in detail (he does what! You like it? Does he do {fill in the blank}? Is it good?) but as we got older and the relationships got more serious, any talk about sex became more vague. Now she's been married for years, and I'm divorced and back in a serious relationship, and while I think she and I COULD talk about sex in detail if for some reason one of had to, we don't, out of respect for the men in our lives. We'll still make silly comments, like I told her my bf was out of town and I was getting antsy for him to get back and she laughed at me, but that's about it.


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## BlueWoman (Jan 8, 2015)

In my 20’s when I didn’t have a serious relationship: Hell yeah, all the time. 
In my 30’s when I was in a sexless marriage: Never
In my 40’s now divorced...sometimes, but nothing like my 20s


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## maquiscat (Aug 20, 2019)

Depends upon the group of friends. Ignoring overlaps, typically you won't find me talking about sex with say my gaming friends. However, with my kink friends, sure. Normally it's about techniques and plays. Rarely do we discuss details of current partners, unless the partner is also there, sharing just as enthusiastically. And if and when we talk about the details of past partners, it's always in terms where we don't identify an given individual. "There was this one woman who I...."


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## frenchpaddy (May 31, 2021)

never not a word to anyone other than my wife ,


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

I think that details of our sex life are for us and no one else.


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## Yoni (Feb 7, 2021)

When I was young I did with girls but since became adult I realized that's so rude to my partner talk about personal sex life to others


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

I've had one friend who I talked to like a big brother to help him.

My other friends and I tell old "war" stories from our single days over a beer and cigars but nothing about our current partners.


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## Personal (Jan 16, 2014)

Not with friends I know in person, that's what the internet is for.


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## Luckylucky (Dec 11, 2020)

No, we don’t talk about it.


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## CharlieParker (Aug 15, 2012)

Yes, in a general sense of we do still have elder sex regularly. That, and please don't stop by unannounced, just assume we're having sex (probably not, but still maybe), so call first.


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## maquiscat (Aug 20, 2019)

CharlieParker said:


> Yes, in a general sense of we do still have elder sex regularly. That, and please don't stop by unannounced, just assume we're having sex (probably not, but still maybe), so call first.


We tell something similar to our kids. Always call ahead before dropping by. You never know when we are doing naked laundry day.


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## 346745 (Oct 7, 2020)

Not in great detail. May say "got lucky last night." that's about it.


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## BigDaddyNY (May 19, 2021)

We have occasionally talked about sex with friends, always couple talking to couple and never deep into details. I never talk about it with just me and my friends and I don't think my wife talks to her friends about it either. As much as we love our friends that is personal territory that doesn't get shared.


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## 346745 (Oct 7, 2020)

BigDaddyNY said:


> We have occasionally talked about sex with friends, always couple talking to couple and never deep into details. I never talk about it with just me and my friends and I don't think my wife talks to her friends about it either. As much as we love our friends that is personal territory that doesn't get shared.


My wife says she does not talk about sex with her girlfriends. I don't know. Maybe. Maybe not. Gotta think they hint about it sipping wine?


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

True story:

Our best couple friends that we have had since we were dating and us had always had pretty open dialogue in regards to sexuality. 

We would travel together periodically and we would always make a point of going to adult shoppes together and if we got a cabin together we would each be getting it on in our own bedrooms but make no attempt to be quiet and then the next day joke and banter about how it must have been a good night for everyone or if we had adjoining hotel rooms we’d joke that other people on the floor couldn’t get any sleep etc. 

The other wife in particular was always very open and bold about her desires and at times would just announce that she was really horny and they needed to have sex and would take him by the hand and go to their room,, and then the next day say that it was a good night —— 5 times LOL 

This went on for over 15 years. 

Then one night they basically propositioned us and told they had been talking and that they wanted to expand their sexual repertoire and wanted to have a couple/couple experience with us. 

What is ironic is we had been active swingers for years and had never even hinted about anything like that with them, and they were very religious and active church members and much more prim and proper than us, but yet they were the ones that were propositioning us. 

(And no, they did not know we had been swingers and still do not know)

So you could say that having a sexually open dialogue and friendly sexual banter with friends worked out quite well for us LOL 😉


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## Overwhelmedagain (Apr 24, 2021)

oldshirt said:


> True story:
> 
> Our best couple friends that we have had since we were dating and us had always had pretty open dialogue in regards to sexuality.
> 
> ...


They were very religious 😂😂😂


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## BigDaddyNY (May 19, 2021)

oldshirt said:


> True story:
> 
> Our best couple friends that we have had since we were dating and us had always had pretty open dialogue in regards to sexuality.
> 
> ...


So I take it you accepted their offer? I have to admit it is hard for me to not have a somewhat voyeuristic view of that kind of lifestyle, but I could never imagine actually engaging in it with my wife and any of our friends.


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

BigDaddyNY said:


> So I take it you accepted their offer? I have to admit it is hard for me to not have a somewhat voyeuristic view of that kind of lifestyle, but I could never imagine actually engaging in it with my wife and any of our friends.


To be honest, when the proposal was made, I was a bit gobsmacked. 

In fact, when my wife and I started having our first discussions about swinging, one of the very first ground rules we established was that we would never mingle with any traditional friends or coworkers, neighbors etc etc, we would swing strictly with swingers and keep traditional friends tradition and that we would never be “out” and that we would always keep our private matters private.

We have never told a soul about our private life and here on TAM is the only place and the only people I’ve ever discussed it with. 

We were hesitant at first and did discuss it at length for a few months before deciding there was no real tangible reason not to. 

We were good friends and had good open communication and we were all decent compassionate and respectful people and we all decided that the only reasons not to were fear-based and that we would be able to work through any bumps in the road that might come up. 

This was over half dozen years ago. We got with them a few times had some fun and some laughs. The other wife and I got on like porn stars (we are both the HLs in our marriages) but the other husband and my wife never really clicked sexually even though they are both better looking people than the other wife and I. They are both the LLs of our marriages so they never really got off the ground sexually. 

After a few times, we just went back to being traditional couple friends and are still best couple friends but haven’t done anything sexual in half dozen or more years.


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## BigDaddyNY (May 19, 2021)

oldshirt said:


> To be honest, when the proposal was made, I was a bit gobsmacked.
> 
> In fact, when my wife and I started having our first discussions about swinging, one of the very first ground rules we established was that we would never mingle with any traditional friends or coworkers, neighbors etc etc, we would swing strictly with swingers and keep traditional friends tradition and that we would never be “out” and that we would always keep our private matters private.
> 
> ...


I'm really impressed that the friendship held up after that. I guess it speaks to the depth of the friendship. As I'm sure you know very well it is quite difficult for someone not into this to really wrap their mind around it. It is hard to believe from my perspective that it would work, but obviously it can.


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## Evinrude58 (Jun 16, 2014)

I don’t. My friends aren’t interested in one a other’s sex lives. I wouldn’t want to discuss something like that and have my friends looking differently at my SO...

we talk about engines, dogs, cars, construction, work, fishing, hunting, politics...

Talking about sex in my experience is something that happens among kids or adults who aren’t getting enough.


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

BigDaddyNY said:


> I'm really impressed that the friendship held up after that. I guess it speaks to the depth of the friendship. As I'm sure you know very well it is quite difficult for someone not into this to really wrap their mind around it. It is hard to believe from my perspective that it would work, but obviously it can.


I actually thinks it goes on a lot more than what any of us realize. 

If you knew them, you would never dream in a million years that they would do something like this. 

They are very active in their church. Very religious. Very by the book and proper in all areas of their life. 

We were thoroughly shocked when they propositioned us and they were probably a bit shocked when we took them up on it because my wife and I do not appear anything other than completely mainstream and traditional as well.

If fact if you were to meet my wife and I, you would never dream we would either. Although very slender and good looking, my wife is very shy and not all that sociable in general. And you may not think I have ever had much sex AT ALL, as I am very average in stature and looks and often quite nerdy.

If this can happen with us, it probably happens the whole world over a lot and people just don’t talk about it.


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## 346745 (Oct 7, 2020)

oldshirt said:


> To be honest, when the proposal was made, I was a bit gobsmacked.
> 
> In fact, when my wife and I started having our first discussions about swinging, one of the very first ground rules we established was that we would never mingle with any traditional friends or coworkers, neighbors etc etc, we would swing strictly with swingers and keep traditional friends tradition and that we would never be “out” and that we would always keep our private matters private.
> 
> ...


I can think of two couples - one whom we do have pillow talk about now and then - whose such offer would be mighty difficult to ignore. Great story, thanks for sharing.


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## Girl_power (Aug 11, 2018)

I have one best friend that I talk to about sex but not that into detail. And it’s always about issues because I’m going to her first help, or to feel understood. It’s never to brag or anything like that.


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## Willnotbill (May 13, 2021)

I have a group of friend that I've had since high school and we have always talked about sex. We've all said way more than we should have about experiences. I always wondered how much was embelished? Now we are much older so most of our talk is about lack of sex.


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## jorgegene (May 26, 2012)

I've never talked to any one of my friends about sex. Its a private matter to me. When boys used to get together, we would talk and joke about sex, but in general. Not like in 'what we did last night'. To me, thats gross.
Would never do it. Would never want to do it.


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## 346745 (Oct 7, 2020)

Willnotbill said:


> I have a group of friend that I've had since high school and we have always talked about sex. We've all said way more than we should have about experiences. I always wondered how much was embelished? Now we are much older so most of our talk is about lack of sex.


My wife claims she never talks about sex when with her girlfriends. I find that hard to believe.


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