# Found the right bad guy.



## Bon242 (Apr 7, 2016)

I did not find the right head to post this, so I'm sharing it here. I love this guy and its been almost 5 years that we are in relation. He is just the perfect guy for me and I know he is my soul mate. And yesterday, he proposed me, with the most beautiful cushion cut diamond ring I've ever seen in whole of Vancouver. It was like a dream come true. But I'm sure my parents won't like him, cause he is like the bad guy in love with the good girl. He doesn't even have a proper job and is always involved in some kind of fight. He was also arrested couple of times for over speeding. He breaks all rules and is such a spoiled brat. But I know he loves me truly, and so do I. So now how do I convince my parents or is it even the right decision to get married to such a guy?


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

How did he afford the ring if he does not have a proper job?


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

Yea, um, well you might want to listen to your parents on this one.


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## Bon242 (Apr 7, 2016)

I thought, some one would ask that. His family is quite rich. He asked money from his elder brother. Off course he didn't tell me that. But I figured it out and that's why I'm quite worried. Cause he didn't wait to buy me a ring from his own earnings. He is good at heart and he loves me a lot, but he doesn't think straight. He is so not serious in life. At least not with his career. But I can't think of staying away from him. I love him a lot.


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## BookOfJob (Jul 6, 2012)

How come this sounds like a bait post from a troll?



Bon242 said:


> ....or is it even the right decision to get married to such a guy?


Imagine 10 years down the road when the feeling of madly in love erodes a bit, but all his habits are unchanged (like changing jobs, violence, or asking family for money)?

So the most prudent advice is probably, "wait for a little more to know how compatible"?


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## citygirl4344 (Mar 4, 2016)

If you have doubts now it's a sign.
He just proposed and you are already worried. You should be on cloud 9. The happiest you've ever been not worrying.
Sounds like he needs to grow up before you get married.


Sent from my iPhone


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

Just marry him. You don't need your parents permission. Make sure you have a good job to support him.


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## Miss Independent (Mar 24, 2014)

How old are you?


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## citygirl4344 (Mar 4, 2016)

blueinbr said:


> Just marry him. You don't need your parents permission. Make sure you have a good job to support him.




What?
Please tell me that was tongue in cheek.


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## Cooper (Apr 18, 2008)

You sound like a young girl in lust, not love.

If you two are teenagers there's a chance he may mature and turn into a good man, but if you two are anything past your mid twenties and the guy is still acting like a fool with his life why would you want to be involved with him?

Be logical and think about things, who he is and who you are, how he acts and how you act, is there's any common life goals, etc, etc.

If it makes no sense to your logical mind why you want to be with him but you can't keep your hands off him that means it is simply lust, and lust never last very long. Enjoy him for what he is, a dark and dirty fling, but don't even think of marrying him unless he starts acting like a man you would be proud of.


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## Evinrude58 (Jun 16, 2014)

You must have described at least 4 characteristics of your guy that should be dead giveaways of future misery that are stand alone deal breakers.

How could you a date man like this? Consider marrying him????
Really? I'll say it--- you're making a huge mistake, and you know it. That's just sad.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

Bon242 said:


> He doesn't even have a proper job and is always involved in some kind of fight. He was also arrested couple of times for over speeding. He breaks all rules and is such a spoiled brat. But I know he loves me truly, and so do I.


Assuming this post is not a advert for a jewelry company (linked picture), I would bring the ring to another jeweler or pawn shop to have it appraised.

First make sure it is a real diamond. Then get the appraised value in case you need to pawn the ring to get the money to bail him out of jail. If it really is an expensive ring then at least you will have some money available (by selling it) when he cheats on you and you have to move out.

BTW it is a nice ring.


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## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good evening
So..you found a website that had the ring he got you?

Still, add or not, the post does bring up the important issue: bad guys are well...bad. Despite the romance movies, in real life they tend to treat their partner as badly as the treat everyone else. The opportunities for him to use his bad-boy awesomeness to protect you from roving bands of aliens will be very limited. Mostly what will matter is whether he treats you well and can hold down a normal job.


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## Pam (Oct 7, 2010)

I was questioning age as I read, too.

That isn't a cushion cut diamond, it's round. Very round.


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## WorkingWife (May 15, 2015)

Bon242 said:


> I thought, some one would ask that. His family is quite rich. He asked money from his elder brother. Off course he didn't tell me that. But I figured it out and that's why I'm quite worried. Cause he didn't wait to buy me a ring from his own earnings. He is good at heart and he loves me a lot, but he doesn't think straight. He is so not serious in life. At least not with his career. But I can't think of staying away from him. I love him a lot.


How old are you?

The reason your parents (and all the older folk on this forum) will tell you "don't do it" is because we have the experience of the years to understand that no matter how stone cold crazy you are for each other right now, and even if he's a trust fund baby and never needs to work, long term, you will fall out of love and become very frustrated, very resentful, and very unhappy with a man like this.

What you want and need from a marriage changes over the years. If he is not maturing with you, someday you will sit alone and cry wondering how you could have been so foolish to sacrifice your life for an overgrown man-boy.

Also, if he is a spoiled brat and used to having what he wants, he's probably very high risk for being the type of man who will cheat on you as soon as he gets bored.


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

Bon242 said:


> ...I know he is my soul mate.


No such thing.


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## citygirl4344 (Mar 4, 2016)

GusPolinski said:


> No such thing.




I agree...maybe I'm jaded. Lol


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## Evinrude58 (Jun 16, 2014)

How do you convince your parents to let you marry this guy? 
Tell them he borrowed money from his bro to get the ring because he has no job. Or tell them he gets in lots of fights because he is so tough.
Tell them how he has lots of run-ins with the law, and how his rich parents always bail him out of trouble. They'll love that.
If all this fails, remind them how much you love each other and how sure you are it will all work out. 
Last thing that I'm sure will work:
Tell them since he hasn't a job, that he's willing to move in with you and your parents for a while. That when he knocks you up, he will let them babysit while he hangs out with the cool guys from the pub a few blocks over. That will win them over.

Please don't marry this guy.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## RClawson (Sep 19, 2011)

You need to marry this guy because no one else will measure up no matter who they are. Face it your attracted to losers.


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## primavera (Sep 4, 2014)

OP, did I misunderstand or have you been dating this guy for 5 years and you haven't even introduced him to your parents yet? If not surely that says something in itself?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

you mentioned all his bad points. and they all seem to be red flags.

so what is the attraction.....is he that good a lover that you can't stay away?

give us some of his good qualities.

I predict that if you marry him its is very likely you will end up abused.

you deserve better.

good luck


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Marry him. He sounds like a catch. Nice ring. It will come in handy in case you have to hock it to get the deposit money to move into that single-wide trailer you always dreamed of.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

In which country are you?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## TX-SC (Aug 25, 2015)

I think you should marry him. Sometimes things get slow around here and your marriage will bring us plenty to read.


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Tell him "as soon as you have a real job that you've held for six months, I'll start wearing the ring and tell everyone."


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## Steve1000 (Nov 25, 2013)

blueinbr said:


> First make sure it is a real diamond. Then get the appraised value in case you need to pawn the ring to get the money to bail him out of jail. If it really is an expensive ring then at least you will have some money available (by selling it) when he cheats on you and you have to move out.


Now, that's some useful advice! :smile2:


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

or not stolen.


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