# Do you miss what you used to have?



## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

I enjoy our sex life. Sometimes I can't help but think of some of the things we used to do but has gone by the wayside as we get older. Just sitting here and thinking about what we now do for PIV positions has decreased to a small number. I love the wife and we have great sex most of the time. But it's nice to go down memory lane to see how much crazier things used to be before kids and adult responsibilities come into play. If I take a mental inventory for the positions we do now, I would say we have dropped down to the following:

missionary, doggie style, spoons, her on stomach, her bent over the bed, he laying on back on bed while I stand, cowgirl, her laying on her side at the edge of bed while I'm standing, 'The T' (her on her back pulling legs back while I lay on side), "standing doggie against the wall". For PIV, that's all we have left in our repetoire. Anal much less frequently than in the past and oral even more rare than that. 

Anyone ever think back to when times were more wild? I'm kinda excited to see the kids grow up because then we get to be alone more often again - just hoping we have some wild crazy years left.

I think having teens has got me down lately, and our adult child is not stepping up to the plate like we think he should be.


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

Hi Plan, 

If I could, let me make a public service announcement for the Furniture Warehouse to help you think about your Christmas shopping list...

Badsanta


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

@badsanta,

We actually had a bed very similar to the one in your picture, ours did not have the tall posts though, and we broke it having sex. The bed had been in my H's family and was given to us so it was a bit old but I really liked it. He put too much pressure on the side board with his foot as he pounded into me and we heard this loud crack and then the mattress tilted me back toward him. 

Is there anything that makes a man prouder than breaking a bed because he f***ed his wife so hard? I think his chest remained puffed up for a whole week.


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

Plan,

That's the one of the good things about your kids getting their drivers license and getting a car. We can be *busy* when they go out without having to worry about dressing again to go pick them up. However, watching the clock to ensure they are home on time brings its own set of worries.

I miss the energy I once had for sex. I miss having sex frequently. Everything we used to do we still do...except the sex swing. There isn't enough privacy for that.


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## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

Anon Pink said:


> @badsanta,
> 
> We actually had a bed very similar to the one in your picture, ours did not have the tall posts though, and we broke it having sex. The bed had been in my H's family and was given to us so it was a bit old but I really liked it. He put too much pressure on the side board with his foot as he pounded into me and we heard this loud crack and then the mattress tilted me back toward him.
> 
> Is there anything that makes a man prouder than breaking a bed because he f***ed his wife so hard? I think his chest remained puffed up for a whole week.


The pic isn't showing up for me, but my wife and I broke our bed in 3 of the 4 support corners at various times having sex. I had to buy a steel round at Home Depot and start cutting it up to insert rods into the framing for support. We had to buy a new bed a few years back that is Amish made and build like a brick ****house. Our bed is now unbreakable.


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## Holdingontoit (Mar 7, 2012)

See, that is the advantage of never having had a decent sex life. I don't have any memories of times when it was "better". Since it always was awful, the current complete absence of sex is more like a peaceful respite than a hollow emptiness.


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## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

Anon Pink said:


> Plan,
> 
> *That's the one of the good things about your kids getting their drivers license and getting a car.* We can be *busy* when they go out without having to worry about dressing again to go pick them up. However, watching the clock to ensure they are home on time brings its own set of worries.
> 
> I miss the energy I once had for sex. I miss having sex frequently. Everything we used to do we still do...except the sex swing. There isn't enough privacy for that.


It's getting better, but at the same time with the additional activities it's a challenge too. We've had to sneak off to other parts of the house to have sex while the kids are doing their thing. Pounding her from behind while she's leaning against the wall behind the furnace in the basement can be pretty hot - believe it or not - but I yearn for that day when we can comfortably come out into the living room knowing no one is around and to just enjoy each other.


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

peacem said:


> Yeah you would think so wouldn't you? We broke a bed from having sex and decided to replace it with a new one because it was very old. I thought someone might be able to repair it but my husband wouldn't let me put it on freecycle because he was worried about what the neighbours would think :surprise:
> 
> He's not a natural exhibitionist.


Worried what the neighbors would think? They'd think the bed broke because of only two reasons: 1. Kids jumping on it. 2. Parents f***ing on it. 

Was he also worried what the neighbors would think when you showed up pregnant? I mean...you had to have sex for that one too. 

One day no one will be raised with shame regarding sex. One day...


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

Plan 9 from OS said:


> It's getting better, but at the same time with the additional activities it's a challenge too. We've had to sneak off to other parts of the house to have sex while the kids are doing their thing. Pounding her from behind while she's leaning against the wall behind the furnace in the basement can be pretty hot - believe it or not - but I yearn for that day when we can comfortably come out into the living room knowing no one is around and to just enjoy each other.


Yeah that's hot..the sneak away... Our sneak away place is in the shed when we've both been working in the yard, filthy, sweaty. Yup, that's some dirty sex right there.


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## JoeHenderson (Oct 3, 2011)

Anon Pink said:


> @badsanta,
> 
> We actually had a bed very similar to the one in your picture, ours did not have the tall posts though, and we broke it having sex. The bed had been in my H's family and was given to us so it was a bit old but I really liked it. He put too much pressure on the side board with his foot as he pounded into me and we heard this loud crack and then the mattress tilted me back toward him.
> 
> Is there anything that makes a man prouder than breaking a bed because he f***ed his wife so hard? I think his chest remained puffed up for a whole week.


I would seriously have a grin on my face similar to that guy on the old Enzyte commercials.


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## norajane (Feb 7, 2012)

I fall into the "count your blessings" camp rather than the "dwell on what makes you miserable" camp. Stop focusing so much on what you don't have at the moment, or it will prevent you from enjoying or even noticing the goodness that you do have. 

It's also really, really hard to live with a person who only looks at what they don't have. It makes you feel like they don't appreciate what they do have, and that they are never satisfied with you and what you do is never enough. It comes off as critical and unappreciative of your partner/life.

This isn't just a sex thing. I'm 48 and can't stay out all night dancing like I used to when I was 23, something I loved. I'm not going to waste time lamenting that loss, and instead prefer to focus on the awesome vacations my SO and I can afford to take these days. Life is good. Don't ruin it by only thinking about what you used to have.


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

Plan 9 from OS said:


> The pic isn't showing up for me, but my wife and I broke our bed in 3 of the 4 support corners at various times having sex. I had to buy a steel round at Home Depot and start cutting it up to insert rods into the framing for support. We had to buy a new bed a few years back that is Amish made and build like a brick ****house. Our bed is now unbreakable.


Right after my wife and I got married we traveled out of the country to spend the first Christmas with her family. 

We broke the bed! 

Nothing says "I love your daughter" to a house full of very Catholic South Americans than having to ask my new father-in-law in my very broken version of español to help fix the bed that his daughter and I were sleeping in together!

Cheers, 
Badsanta


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## UMP (Dec 23, 2014)

Plan 9 from OS, 
I can give you some hope. Me 53, wife will be 50 in a couple months, 24 year marriage. 
I would not trade our current sex life for any other year in our marriage.
She is as hot as hell, hotter than when we first got married.
I can't even believe it myself.


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## Bibi1031 (Sep 14, 2015)

badsanta said:


> We broke the bed!
> 
> Nothing says "I love your daughter" to a house full of very Catholic South Americans than having to ask my new father-in-law in my very broken version of español to help fix the bed that his daughter and I were sleeping in together!
> 
> ...


Ay pobrecito...NOT? Jealous a tad? Yes, I am. >

Bibi


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## Fozzy (Jul 20, 2013)

Anon Pink said:


> @badsanta,
> 
> We actually had a bed very similar to the one in your picture, ours did not have the tall posts though, and we broke it having sex. The bed had been in my H's family and was given to us so it was a bit old but I really liked it. He put too much pressure on the side board with his foot as he pounded into me and we heard this loud crack and then the mattress tilted me back toward him.
> 
> Is there anything that makes a man prouder than breaking a bed because he f***ed his wife so hard? I think his chest remained puffed up for a whole week.


I once gave my wife a nosebleed from it. Ah, the good ol' days.


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## Giro flee (Mar 12, 2013)

I just thought everybody broke a bed during sex at least once in their lifetime, right? I mean beds are pretty fragile for two adults to be bouncing around on...

I don't miss anything, we've gained way more than we have lost.

Ok, the only thing I dislike is that my hip can now hurt during missionary, that never happened in my twenties.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*Inasfar as the financial security is concerned, I miss that only mildly. But I've long since learned how to cope without that luxury!

Also miss the closeness and all of the mutual flirting with a female companion!

But the sex with a blatant cheater, well let's just say that I do not miss that aspect at all! 

Nor do I miss any of her delinquent, criminal, tatted-up, drug-head kids!*
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

Fozzy said:


> I once gave my wife a nosebleed from it. Ah, the good ol' days.


I think more details might be in order...


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## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

Anon Pink said:


> I think more details might be in order...


Guessing wrong hole


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## inarut (Feb 9, 2013)

Well, with kids in the house you do have to be more cautious and there is definitely less freedom for spontaneity but you mentioned positions. So what stops you from doing all those positions you used to do? Initiate them if that's what you want. If you want more variety in terms of place, I'm sure you can sneak something in somewhere at least now and then.


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## Woodchuck (Nov 1, 2012)

We found early on that 4 paint cans under the mattress frame held up much better than the original legs......Also drill and attach the bed slats to the frame with screws....It keeps the frame rails from twisting..


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## Lila (May 30, 2014)

"There is a season and a time to every purpose under heaven"

Personally I've found that dwelling on the past prevents me from enjoying the good things happening to me today. I'll trade the spontaneous, three ring circus sex for my kids laughter, smiles, and "love yous" any day of the week. It's part of the season I'm in.


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## Fozzy (Jul 20, 2013)

Anon Pink said:


> I think more details might be in order...


Not much to tell. Railed her. Hard. Nose started bleeding. Not sure if I pushed something up too far...


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## Young at Heart (Jan 6, 2015)

Plan 9 from OS said:


> ....Just sitting here and thinking about what we now do for PIV positions has decreased to a small number.
> 
> ....Anyone ever think back to when times were more wild?


Do I miss what I use to have? HELL NO! 

I use to be in a SSM, now at least my wife and I "make love" twice a week. Even if the number of positions is limited to missionary and cowgirl, my wife has mastered them both quite well and can rock my world when she is in the mood.

Getting older is about change and readjusting the compromises in marriage. Finding things or frequency that satisfies both.

You glass is half full not half empty. Good luck to you.


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## happy as a clam (Jan 5, 2014)

This thread is cracking me up!

We bought a new bed a few years ago. We haven't managed to break it yet, but now that I think about it, it IS making some strange creaking and popping noises during times of action... it may not be long for the road.

:lol:


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## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

happy as a clam said:


> This thread is cracking me up!
> 
> We bought a new bed a few years ago. We haven't managed to break it yet, but now that I think about it, it IS making some strange creaking and popping noises during times of action... it may not be long for the road.
> 
> :lol:


Our bed frame is made out of 2x12's and 3/8" lag screws, so pretty indestructible...but dayum...the worry free leverage we can get with her hands against one side and my feet against the other...


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## karole (Jun 30, 2010)

My husband and I are officially empty nesters (since May of this year) and I can say, without a doubt, that it is WONDERFUL!! Our sex life is better than it's been in years!! It's almost like being newlyweds again. My husband and I love reminiscing about our sex life - when we do, it always puts my husband in the mood..........so I try to bring up the subject often! LOL


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## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

karole said:


> My husband and I are officially empty nesters (since May of this year) and I can say, without a doubt, that it is WONDERFUL!! Our sex life is better than it's been in years!! It's almost like being newlyweds again. My husband and I love reminiscing about our sex life - when we do, it always puts my husband in the mood..........so I try to bring up the subject often! LOL


You give me hope!


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

Lila said:


> "There is a season and a time to every purpose under heaven"
> 
> Personally I've found that dwelling on the past prevents me from enjoying the good things happening to me today. I'll trade the spontaneous, three ring circus sex for my kids laughter, smiles, and "love yous" any day of the week. It's part of the season I'm in.


 @Lila is the same as I feel in my relationship in that there is SO MUCH MORE than just sex to enjoy in the relationship. So far having teenage kids in the house has not been awkward (albeit sometimes moody), as they can actually be helpful and enjoy participating in the family. Our kids LOVE TO HELP COOK, and I don't mind doing the dirty work and helping to clean up afterwards. 

As far as sex goes it is not so much about quantity or doing wild things, but more so about quality and having a much deeper connection. If anything my idea of "wild" these days is taking some time to just slow myself down and let her just enjoy teasing the ever living shît out of me while I tell her how beautiful she is.

Cheers, 
Badsanta


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## Woodchuck (Nov 1, 2012)

No longer having the kids in the house allows you to be *loud...*i love it...


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## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

Woodchuck said:


> No longer having the kids in the house allows you to be *loud...*i love it...


I know when we get the house to ourselves there is less inhibition. I think the kids are a net drain on the sex life. I can't too much though because we do have sex somewhat regularly, but it's annoying to listen for footsteps while you have it.


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## Emerald (Aug 2, 2012)

Yes I do.

I miss my flat stomach & bikini bod

Ooops...were you talking about sex?


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