# He proposed 2 weeks ago and was almost caught with another man



## geekgal (Dec 14, 2009)

I met my fiance and he has been a dream come true in every aspect. Loves my kids, amazing family man, amazing in bed, etc... I moved in with him about four months ago and everything has been great. If anything I was the one holding back. He has been an open book, giving me email passwords, etc... all along. When he proposed I let down all walls and accepted the ring with my whole heart. Last week I was in bed sick but I noticed something just wasn't right, a nagging feeling. For the first time I went into his email and found out he had responded to an ad on craigslist and was planning to meet a MAN that night. I was at work and just sat here in shock. I'm open minded but he has been cheated on before and told me that would be the one thing I could do and he would turn his back on me. I have read the emails hundreds of times I think. I even emailed both of them, went to the bridal store, cancelled the layaway, etc... He swears it was a one time thing and he was just curious because of doors I had opened up to him. Everyone in his family is angry, but none of them knows he was planning to meet a man. In a small southern town like this it would ruin him and his family and his kids and parents do not deserve this. He is begging me to to stay, to just give him one chance, my kids even want me to stay. And even though I hate myself for it I do love him. WTH do I DO? I can't sleep, I can't concentrate, I can't do anything but think about this. it has crushed me.


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## Beninyourshoes (Jul 31, 2009)

I would have to say some counseling would be in order. Did you ask if he catches or pitches? Sorry, couldn't resist.


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## cody5 (Sep 2, 2009)

As long as you're comfortable marrying a gay man with a propensity for lying and infidelity, go for it.


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## stillINshock (Apr 9, 2009)

Make sure in your heart - and every cell of your body that you are not his 'cover' - his public appearance person. You were right to hold off on the wedding. Take your time. There must be more he is not telling you. Don't pay attention to anyone else. And don't feel you have to end it. Don't make any decisions now. You went with your gut - stay with it. Ask a million questions. Feel 100% sure he's entering your family and your life for the right reasons.


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## Atholk (Jul 25, 2009)

Marry him and you will regret it. Just leave. Very sad but true.


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## cody5 (Sep 2, 2009)

Now that I think about it, I don't think I've read a single post from a gay man asking relationship questions here. Not many gays around. Go to gay relationship forum. That's where you need to get your advice. Personally, I don't believe in bisexuality for men. Any man that claims he's bisexual is gay and trying to fit into a straight world. 

Seriously, you need to hear from gay men.


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## stillINshock (Apr 9, 2009)

There's actually been some helpful advice in the sex forum on this site. Post there too. But beyond the man on man sex thing, its the fact that he did it behind your back. If he said we was exploring something that "you" (plural) had opened, then why didn't he explore that option with you? THAT to me is the bigger deal. He's not telling you something. He's lying to you and that is no way to start a lifelong commitment.


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## cody5 (Sep 2, 2009)

BEYOND the man on man sex thing? It's ALL about that. That's where the lying starts. That's why he NEEDS to go outside of the marriage for his gratification. What about AIDS? Have you been tested?

Look at my first, short post in this thread. That's all you need to know.


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## stillINshock (Apr 9, 2009)

cody - and anyone out there - 
do you really think that a guy that crosses the line is flat out gay? what if he just wanted to be the recipient - in a bill clinton kind of way? does that too make him gay?


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## cody5 (Sep 2, 2009)

stillINshock said:


> cody - and anyone out there -
> do you really think that a guy that crosses the line is flat out gay? what if he just wanted to be the recipient - in a bill clinton kind of way? does that too make him gay?


Beyond a shadow of a doubt.


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## Atholk (Jul 25, 2009)

stillINshock said:


> cody - and anyone out there -
> do you really think that a guy that crosses the line is flat out gay? what if he just wanted to be the recipient - in a bill clinton kind of way? does that too make him gay?


Yup.


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## grizzlybe (Dec 15, 2009)

You can´t stay with a man qho is obviously gay. You can try fighting for him but if hes gay their is no chance and you won´t be happy for the rest of your life! Think about that...


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