# Infidelity- where's the line?



## Theword_love (May 31, 2011)

Hello. I am 26 and my husband just turned 29. We have a 10 month old baby and have been married 3 years. My husband is finally about to graduate in December and I believe he has just had the most stressful semester of his life; with the baby plus private violin students plus many seasonal gigs plus school.

Ok so that is the background. 

In April he started acting weird and when I asked him what was up he said he wasn't sure if he loved me any more. He said it was nothing bad or wrong that I had done, but it was just him. I immediately started looking for signs of cheating. I had full access to his emails and I immediately found that he'd been messaging a girl on facebook and talking about getting together to collaborate (she's a pianist) on some music. I knew nothing about her so.... I messaged her. I simply asked if she had spent any time with him, and apologized for being forward. She said no, she lives with her bf and it was just a "musical desire to collaborate." Well.. When he found out about this he got SOOOOOO pissed at me. Worse than ever. He said by messaging her I messed up everything. I was scared and insecure and I don't regret trying to find the truth. Anyways, over the next couple months he started texting her constantly and emailing her. Also talking to her late at night and lying to me telling me it was someone else. That stuff has tapered off this month. He moved out the first week of June, saying he wanted to try it for a month. He could only stay away for a week b/c he missed our son.

My question is this-- how would YOU feel about this other girl? I know she's taken but I also know he was VERY infatuated with her. While he doesn't seem to talk to her any more, I have found him looking at personal ads on craigslist, and looking at youtube links that say "good questions to ask a hot girl" and "best questions to ask a girl on a first date." He hasn't slept with anyone else, but I just don't know what to make of this crap. I never EVER thought I would be considering a divorce. He still says he doesn't know if he loves me. AND he doesn't know if he's staying with me. He is making me miserable. I try to love and respect him always, but every day that gets more difficult and less natural for me.


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