# Trying to leave



## Surfsup1963 (Nov 6, 2021)

I’ve already made the decision to leave after years of mental health issues on both sides. But partner keeps coming back and pleading, wanting to talk, wanting a glimmer of hope that I don’t know exists. I’m emotionally exhausted from the relationship to the point of resentment, losing who I am, friendships and other relationships suffering, and physical ailments. Communication about all of this has fallen on deaf ears for years. But now the threat of the end has sparked promises of change, anything to save the relationship, etc. I need out for my own sake. But when partner approaches me after asking multiple times for space, I get confused again, empathetic, and question my choice. Is this emotional manipulation? I’m so stuck in the mess I literally feel trapped. I’m wondering if I’m being manipulated (intentionally or not) or if I should take more time, even though I feel I already made this decision.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

From what you wrote, I think you are being manipulated. It's probably not intentional as it's a normal reaction for a person to suddenly want to address the problems when their partner/spouse informs them that it's over. And very often, after a period of time, once they feel their partner/spouse is settled back in the relationship, things go back to 'normal'.

Do you have any friends or family who you can talk to about this to get some support in real life?


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

Ask them not to contact you again. Block the number. Don't answer emails. Don't answer the door to them.


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