# having a weak moment. :(



## momtoboys (Apr 22, 2012)

As the post stated earlier today i have been getting a long better with my stbxh and have been texting the last 2 days about the kids, and stuff. As my last post said he tries to "sext" with me and i havent been. I have told him no every time. I have told him that im over him and the marriage. (im not really over him but told him that)

But then i did something stupid, a few hours ago i told him i was lonely. Big mistake. He said "well get a boyfriend then".  I can see he doesnt care about me or what i do anymore. Dunno if he really doesnt or if he is doing the same thing i am doing, idk!


I really am at a loss. I know he has to think i am a psycho because i am back and forth up and down emotionally. He told me part of the reason he doesnt want to be with me is because im so back and forth about what i want. I dont want to break down and tell him i still love him because he's told me he is really done this time. So i tell him im over him and i try to stick by it. But then i will have break downs and tell him i wish we werent doing this and could work it out (although i havent done this in a few weeks.)

We are long distance, i havent seen him since Jan. I really feel like we need to see each other to be able to have closure. I need to see him to see how i feel. Does this make sense?


Should i continue to make him think i am over him? I figure if i seem like im over him maybe he will want me back, idk or atleast make me not look so pathetic. 

i want to go 180 but i am really not sure how 180 would work for me since we are long distance. I know i probably should stop contacting him, its hard though. 

ugh i was doing so good, now im back in to a slump


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## unsure78 (Oct 17, 2011)

Mom I agree with Sam the 180 is for YOU, I have gone though the same thing with my ex- at one point he sent me a pic of his junk and a bunch of dirty talk out of the blue ( we never did that when we were together) Just wanting sex. But if I said anything about being lonely he would tell me the same thing - get a boyfriend. My best guess is that he really doesn't care, he is selfish ( like my ex) and you are only useful to him when HE fells like it. Your best it to let go and take care of yourself


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## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

samyeagar said:


> Now interesting question, that I have wondered myself about my wife...what happens if they try using the NC, 180 and other strategies...how does that dynamic work?


I wonder this too...my stbxh has gone completely quiet, not responding to completely business-oriented things like questions about bills. Aggrivating!!!!! I wonder if he is doing the 180 as well. If so, there is no way we will ever reconcile.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Matt1720 (May 7, 2012)

Theres a difference between not engaging emotionally/discussing the relationship, and avoiding taking care of business regarding finances and bills. 

Not doing those things will put you ass out in the street. Just goes to show how unhealthy they are if they can't realize this.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Stop texting him about anything that doesn't involve co-parenting.

Problem resolved. 

Weak moments are normal. But don't feed into him.


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