# karma XWW



## imjustwatching (Jul 8, 2014)

Do you guys have any karma story about the cheating x wife 
I'm really down today i'm waiting for karma to hit my XWW but i'm doing down


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## ButtPunch (Sep 17, 2014)

Please don't wait for karma to hit your ex. Life doesn't work like that. Take charge of YOUR life and live it to the fullest. The hell with her.


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## Q tip (Apr 15, 2014)

There's a thread somewhere that discusses this topic along with a few stories.

But Karma happens. You can't wish it into existence. Live well, hit the gym, be happy and date beautiful ladies. Your happiness is part of that karma. Please don't search it out. It will find her when the time is right.

Live well and happy. That should be enough. Don't be greedy.


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## bigfoot (Jan 22, 2014)

Here is a metaphysical answer. The best karma is when you don't care anymore. you see, losing the love of someone who committed their life to you is karma. It means that you have ceased to exist. You have been unwritten. 

A cheater leaves and fills your spot with another. Your space remains, but someone else is there. The cheater always has that spot, that void, that need... Your used spot. When you no longer care, its different. There is no void. No new person sitting in the cheater's spot. The whole thing becomes new. That's why you wait to start new relationships, because moving too soon just puts someone else in the cheater's dirty spot.

In short, Karma is knowing that you don't care. Not because you are angry, but because you r different and they no longer are a part of you. Karma is also in their head. They will always know that they cheated and did someone wrong. It is a burden. Also, how many cheaters proudly tell their "how we met" story? Most will always live a lie because society hates cheaters. There is your karma.

Live well, forget them. They truly are not worth it.


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## Q tip (Apr 15, 2014)

bigfoot said:


> Here is a metaphysical answer. The best karma is when you don't care anymore. you see, losing the love of someone who committed their life to you is karma. It means that you have ceased to exist. You have been unwritten.
> 
> A cheater leaves and fills your spot with another. Your space remains, but someone else is there. The cheater always has that spot, that void, that need... Your used spot. When you no longer care, its different. There is no void. No new person sitting in the cheater's spot. The whole thing becomes new. That's why you wait to start new relationships, because moving too soon just puts someone else in the cheater's dirty spot.
> 
> ...


Wow. QFT


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## Harken Banks (Jun 12, 2012)

There is some karma for hire that you can find if you subscribe to the right magazines.


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## Squeakr (May 1, 2013)

bigfoot said:


> Most will always live a lie because society hates cheaters. There is your karma.


This used to be the norm, but it seems that as times pass, this becomes less and less the reality (in fact society seems to live vicariously through them, think of Charlie Sheen and lots of modern books, movies, and series that glamorize cheating).


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## Cinema79 (Aug 30, 2013)

Brief story:

- Bad marriage, wife always picked on me. I didn't make enough money, I'm too skinny. She never wanted to be intimate.

- She starts getting really thin, looks really pretty, and gets cold emotionally...you know what this means...

- We divorce.

- Turns out, wife cheated on me with co-worker. They begin dating, and she rubs it in my face. Tells me that her and I would never have worked out, not to ever talk to her again, etc. 

- I get extremely depressed.

- 7 months later, she sees me with my new hotter, thinner, prettier, smarter, nice, accomplished girlfriend. I've also gained 10lbs of muscle, got a job at a Fortune 500 company and make great money and moved two hours away to the prettiest town in our state. Guess who isn't "poor" and "skinny" any more?

- Pictures surface on FB of my ex-wife with a 40lb weight gain, looking terrible. Still living in the same boring town with her co-worker boyfriend in house with his mom. My ego says that my ex-wife didn't probably care to see me holding hands with another woman, and some good Facebook stalking probably did her in and sent her into a pretty depressed state when she saw HOW WELL I was without her. I'm sure my ex-wife enjoyed my recent vacation photos to Cyprus with my new GF!

The best way to get back at them is to move on quickly like they did to you and build a new life. Curiosity will get the best of them eventually and they'll want to track you down. They DON'T want you to do well. It's an ego thing for cheaters, because in their mind they have painted you as "not good enough" so when you do become successful, it completely turns them on their head.


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Only bad one I know about is of an acquaintance of mine down in Tucson. His wife of fifteen years or so got hooked on drugs and left him and her children for her dealer. She also cleaned him out of his life savings before she took off. 

He slowly rebounded, divorced her, moved himself and his kids into a smaller place and they went on with their lives. The ex-WW was killed about two years later in a DUI. Both she and the driver were loaded on booze and coke and drove off the side of an overpass.


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## RV9 (Sep 29, 2014)

Karma? Why do you even care about what happens with her? When would you start caring about yourself? You have been a victim. Now be a Victor.


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## Harken Banks (Jun 12, 2012)

Rohitvikash said:


> Karma? Why do you even care about what happens with her? When would you start caring about yourself? You have been a victim. Now be a Victor.


Life is funny. The world is a funny place. It's OK to laugh.


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## imjustwatching (Jul 8, 2014)

Rohitvikash said:


> Karma? Why do you even care about what happens with her? When would you start caring about yourself? You have been a victim. Now be a Victor.


I care because i could of have some real karma , i could of have her send to jail for 2 years for cheating ( its our law) i did have proofs and her confession and a lot of people who know and ready to witness for me..
but i didn't and i back off because i did love her after all of what she did to me ... but i'm starting to doubt my self now


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## BobSimmons (Mar 2, 2013)

imjustwatching said:


> I care because i could of have some real karma , i could of have her send to jail for 2 years for cheating ( its our law) i did have proofs and her confession and a lot of people who know and ready to witness for me..
> but i didn't and i back off because i did love her after all of what she did to me ... but i'm starting to doubt my self now


What exactly are you waiting for to happen with her? She's living her life, you're sitting there wishing for something bad to happen to her, and if nothing happens then what? Sink into a worse mood? This keep repeating in a cycle, you keep losing while she keeps winning.

Go live your life bruh, go live it well, that's the best karma, knowing when you find happiness that you found it yourself.
In the words of the Rock..it doesn't matter what she thinks!


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## IIJokerII (Apr 7, 2014)

Rohitvikash said:


> Karma? Why do you even care about what happens with her? When would you start caring about yourself? You have been a victim. Now be a Victor.


Yeah, a victim, and lets face it, infidelity is an emotional and psychological rape of oneself. It is fair to want bad things to happen to the ones who hurt us, that high road, move on, let it go bullsh1t is great in theory but not in practice. Once one detaches from the situation too often the BS, even though he/she is in a better place, is extremely hurt and gets the joy of watching their EX have a good ol time, in some cases in the home they once lived in with their children, furniture and even the damn dog. 

I am not saying to practice voodoo or literally sit around and wait but if one does find out they had a bad karma spell or life in general got ****ty for their former WS, then right on.


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## commonsenseisn't (Aug 13, 2014)

Much karma is imperceptible to our mortal eyes. 

To fully comprehend it we must comprehend the purpose of our existence. 

Instant and full reward of karma to cheaters would negate free will because it would be too compelling to not make bad choices. 

How else could we have agency to choose our path/destination if the promise of karma was so obvious? 

I believe karma is inevitable but arrives on its own schedule. 

I also believe that the payment of karma will be so comprehensive that betrayed spouses will look upon their betrayers with pity, empathy and sorrow. 

Sorry to take the discussion to existential philosophy.


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## BobSimmons (Mar 2, 2013)

commonsenseisn't said:


> Much karma is imperceptible to our mortal eyes.
> 
> To fully comprehend it we must comprehend the purpose of our existence.
> 
> ...


You can't cheer that someone has reached the bottom of the barrel, when you yourself are at the bottom of that same barrel.


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## soccermom2three (Jan 4, 2013)

Last spring my cheater SIL had to have a benign tumor removed from her taint. (No, I'm not kidding.)


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## Rugs (Apr 12, 2013)

By the time any Karma came around, it was looong after I wanted it too. 

Basically two cheating old boyfriends called me (while they were married) to tell me what a great gf I was back in the day. 

They were both miserable then and miserable now. 

I was glad that they called me because they both treated me so bad but I had moved on and didn't care anymore. 

At the end of the day, we have to live with ourselves. Live a good life and make sure you are the one who has nothing to apologize for in the future. 

I have never gone out of my way to hurt anyone and I don't like to see or cause anyone to be unhappy. I can live with myself very happily with no regrets. 

Be a good person and live a good life!!


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## GROUNDPOUNDER (Mar 8, 2013)

soccermom2three said:


> Last spring my cheater SIL had to have a benign tumor removed from her taint. (No, I'm not kidding.)


You sure it was a tumor and not a callus?...


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## GROUNDPOUNDER (Mar 8, 2013)

I think what you're looking for is the opposite of serendipitous.
Serendipity means a "fortunate happenstance" or "pleasant surprise". It was coined by Horace Walpole in 1754.

Good things happen to good people. So it would stand to reason that bad things will happen to bad people, also.

When you've payved your way with the stones of deciet, the path that you follow will never lead to where you had hoped it would have...


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

soccermom2three said:


> Last spring my cheater SIL had to have a benign tumor removed from her taint. (No, I'm not kidding.)


Taint? :scratchhead:


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## rustytheboyrobot (Nov 20, 2013)

The first girl I lived with cheated on me. We weren't married but it still messed me up pretty bad. We had been living together for several years.

She called me up a year and a half ago to tell me all about how awesome her life was. She was married and had two kids and a great career. Three months ago she died from cancer. Her twin sister called me. She wasn't married but did have a few terrible and abusive relationships after me. She didn't have two kids she had two dogs. And her career was really waiting tables. She died from lymphoma that she had discovered shortly before looking me up and calling me.

I wasn't and am not happy that her life was terrible. I wish she could have made better choices.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## soccermom2three (Jan 4, 2013)

GROUNDPOUNDER said:


> You sure it was a tumor and not a callus?...


OMG, I'm going to tell that one to my husband, lol!


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## soccermom2three (Jan 4, 2013)

GROUNDPOUNDER said:


> I think what you're looking for is the opposite of serendipitous.
> Serendipity means a "fortunate happenstance" or "pleasant surprise". It was coined by Horace Walpole in 1754.
> 
> Good things happen to good people. So it would stand to reason that bad things will happen to bad people, also.
> ...


I've never used the work Karma. I use, "What goes around, comes around".


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## Rugs (Apr 12, 2013)

GROUNDPOUNDER said:


> You sure it was a tumor and not a callus?...


:rofl:


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## 3putt (Dec 3, 2012)

GROUNDPOUNDER said:


> You sure it was a tumor and not a callus?...



Oh snap!


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## Thundarr (Jul 4, 2012)

imjustwatching said:


> Do you guys have any karma story about the cheating x wife
> I'm really down today i'm waiting for karma to hit my XWW but i'm doing down


Forget karma and learn to be happy for yourself. Karma is slow and I didn't find it satisfying at all. I wasn't wishing karma on my ex but it found her because she earned it. It hits those who don't learn from their mistakes. When my first wife and I split, I felt like she was in for a rude awakening but I had hoped that she and I both learned and would be better partners for someone else.

She's the mother of my children so I hope karma leaves her alone for a while but that's up to her I suppose.


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## Q tip (Apr 15, 2014)

soccermom2three said:


> Last spring my cheater SIL had to have a benign tumor removed from her taint. (No, I'm not kidding.)


She have some kind of bad a$$ story to tell now...


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## Q tip (Apr 15, 2014)

bandit.45 said:


> Taint? :scratchhead:


Bet bandit gets a TAM record for PMs on this...!


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## bigfoot (Jan 22, 2014)

One last point on Karma. I really subscribe to the "I don't give a ****" about them mindset. We want cheaters to suffer because of the suffering they inflicted. Now for some controversy and hopefully not a TJ. I have found, in my interactions with people who have been involved in infidelity on both sides, and this is in not way scientific, but the ones who cut the cheater off, kick them to the curb, or go scorched earth with exposing to everyone seem to have the most satisfying experience in the overall unsatisfying situation. Seriously, it did not lessen the impact on their lives, but in the end, when they told the story, you could honestly see the satisfaction in their eyes. It was like, "yeah, I got my emotional azz kicked, but they got hit too. 

Two quick ones for you, one was a man who left his wife and kids to marry a much younger woman from overseas. He wanted a docile hottie. He ended up having a stroke and had to be cared for by the younger woman. No more sex, but lots of drooling. When he died, she got what was left after all of his medical bills were paid. I felt bad for her because she really was oblivious to everything until he moved her to the States. He'd cheated on his first wife many times before and she finally just let him go and moved on with life. On the male side, this guy's cheated. Said it was just because she was curious and that her husband should get over it. Well, hubby dropped her fast and told EVERYONE. He was devastated, but he was also ruthless. Longtime family friends, co-workers, their kids (teens), family, anyone who thought that she was an upright woman was told. He honestly did not give a flying f*ck who knew. Divorced her and eventually remarried. He did date a lot of women and always made sure the ex heard about the younger ones. She never remarried. She ended up having to live with one of the daughters because she could not afford to support herself. The look in her eyes when you saw her was pitiful. She knew that you knew and that was just humiliating for her.

I've mainly only ever heard of KARMA from the folks who beg, grovel, pine away, and are just lost without their cheating spouse. They seemed to hope for karma the most. 

Again, this is not scientific and comes from a sample of around 10 or so. It is also NOT a judgment on those who want Karma. As I see it, if a cheater gets hit by the KARMA bus, GREAT. Post it, tell the story, and they deserve it. Still, its better to not give a damn.


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## larry.gray (Feb 21, 2011)

bandit.45 said:


> Taint? :scratchhead:


The medical name would be perineum. Taint pvssy and taint ass.


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## Sports Fan (Aug 21, 2014)

The best sort of Karma is to live a successful and happy life, and show her how just how great your life has become without her.


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## Forest (Mar 29, 2014)

I got one, maybe:

Many years ago, I we became friends with a nice couple. Both very attractive types. Husband a great guy. Wife a spendaholic. Friction comes around over her attitudes. Husband sticks with it, wife cheats. Divorce follows.

Now, both go on to good success in their careers. The child prefers to live with dad, so wife becomes a workaholic. Dad has several casual girlfriends, but lives like a respectable, but active bachelor.

This year, husband suddenly dies of heart attack. The sense of tragedy and loss was very evident with ex-wife. 

Not exactly like getting hit by a bus, but I'm sure it gnaws away at her.


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## Thundarr (Jul 4, 2012)

Sports Fan said:


> The best sort of Karma is to live a successful and happy life, and show her how just how great your life has become without her.


I agree and would take it one more step. If karma never comes big deal, if karma slams her to the ground big deal. Forget what she thinks because she doesn't matter.


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## IIJokerII (Apr 7, 2014)

Sports Fan said:


> The best sort of Karma is to live a successful and happy life, and show her how just how great your life has become without her.


Stitch that on a pillow, I want to see them fail, suffer and if I ever find a genie, After immortality and Jedi powers (with light saber of course) my third wish will be for my WS to have taste buds in her colon so she can taste what I had to hear and feel during this whole ordeal......sh1t, for the rest of her life.......


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## Dyokemm (Apr 24, 2013)

Karma does not exist as most people think or assume it does.

When something happens and it appears to our eyes as an occurrence of karma coming home to roost, a deeper analysis will reveal that it is most likely the result of continued sh*tty behavior and decision making by the WS after the M ends.

The fact is, if a person continues to behave in ways that expose themselves to unnecessary risks or treats the people around them in hurtful and disrespectful ways, the law of probability says that eventually that behavior will blow up in their face. 

They will finally injure someone who will seriously retaliate against them....or risky choices will finally lead to a disastrous incident like the one Bandit described.

Karma is nothing more that the playing out of the WS's continued brokenness as a person.


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## commonsenseisn't (Aug 13, 2014)

When karma comes to an ex it might surprise you how you feel. 

Almost 25 years ago I put my ex wife through college and funded some other opportunities that enabled her to get her dream job which she enjoyed and loved for a decade. 

Turned out she lost the job plus any other opportunities in that career because of her dishonesty. 

I mourned over this despite the fact she had ruined my life for a long time. My reaction really surprised me because I had always assumed I'd enjoy bad karma catching up to her.


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## honcho (Oct 5, 2013)

Well im not a big believer in Karma and have never waited for it but after spending a good portion of my morning in court I do think my stbx has been stuck in the wheels of the bus based on the circus act she has become. 

One of the highlights of the karma roadshow for me was when she totaled out her car hitting her then boyfriends car while drunk. Then finding out a couple days later she forgot to pay her insurance so no coverage.


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## Ceegee (Sep 9, 2012)

Karma is cool to watch in the beginning. Sit back, eat some popcorn and enjoy the show. 

After a while it just becomes pathetic. Especially when kids are involved. 

It was funny to hear my XW's POSOM's wife tell me that he still sexts her and that she's had sex with him while he was dating XW. But the constant fighting and relationship instability stresses my kids out. 

The karma bus has paid my XW many visits. Each time it shows up I find myself wishing it would change routes. That she would learn from her mistakes. Release her anger and pride and just grow up. 

It hasn't happened yet and likely never will. 

It is more sad than anything else.


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## 3putt (Dec 3, 2012)

commonsenseisn't said:


> *When karma comes to an ex it might surprise you how you feel.
> *
> Almost 25 years ago I put my ex wife through college and funded some other opportunities that enabled her to get her dream job which she enjoyed and loved for a decade.
> 
> ...


I have to agree with this as I've experienced it myself. 

After only 4(?) years of being married after cheating on and leaving me, my ex got cheated on by her AP as well. He not only left her, but also left her alone with the 2 young kids he fathered along with my former SS that I was raising as my own. From what I hear, she's now dating a sugar daddy about 16/17 years her senior. I'm sure that will end well. 

I thought I would be tickled over the bus running her over, but found that I actually felt nothing but pity for her. Still do.

Go figure.


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

I don't believe in karma.

I BELIEVE IN RETRIBUTION!!!!!:BoomSmilie_anim::BoomSmilie_anim::BoomSmilie_anim::2gunsfiring_v1::2gunsfiring_v1::2gunsfiring_v1::FIREdevil::FIREdevil::FIREdevil::FIREdevil::FIREdevil::FIREdevil:


HA! HA! HA!


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## IIJokerII (Apr 7, 2014)

ConanHub said:


> I don't believe in karma.
> 
> I BELIEVE IN RETRIBUTION!!!!!:BoomSmilie_anim::BoomSmilie_anim::BoomSmilie_anim::2gunsfiring_v1::2gunsfiring_v1::2gunsfiring_v1::FIREdevil::FIREdevil::FIREdevil::FIREdevil::FIREdevil::FIREdevil:
> 
> ...


Weapons free!!!!!


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## 3putt (Dec 3, 2012)

ConanHub said:


> I don't believe in karma.
> 
> I BELIEVE IN RETRIBUTION!!!!!:BoomSmilie_anim::BoomSmilie_anim::BoomSmilie_anim::2gunsfiring_v1::2gunsfiring_v1::2gunsfiring_v1::FIREdevil::FIREdevil::FIREdevil::FIREdevil::FIREdevil::FIREdevil:
> 
> ...


Frankly, I don't have a problem with that either. And he got his taste of me....a big taste. But you'll have to trust me on that one as I won't go into details. But, to this day, he is still terrified of running into me. I have that on very good authority.


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

3putt said:


> Frankly, I don't have a problem with that either. And he got his taste of me....a big taste. But you'll have to trust me on that one as I won't go into details. But, to this day, he is still terrified of running into me. I have that on very good authority.


Warms my heart to hear it! I am sorry for your xw as well. I always want people to grow and heal but retribution always puts a spring in my step and a smile on my face!:smthumbup:


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

imjustwatching said:


> I care because i could of have some real karma , i could of have her send to jail for 2 years for cheating ( its our law) i did have proofs and her confession and a lot of people who know and ready to witness for me..
> but i didn't and i back off because i did love her after all of what she did to me ... but i'm starting to doubt my self now


:wtf: Seriously? You haven't spotted the karma bus that run her over? :scratchhead:

That's really weird, because you were driving it!


> , i could of have her send to jail for 2 years for cheating ( its our law) i did have proofs and her confession and a lot of people who know and ready to witness for me.


*So she owes her future, the fact that she is not in jail, to you, the person she wronged?*

She owes you massively - and she can *never* repay you!:rofl:


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## honcho (Oct 5, 2013)

Ceegee said:


> Karma is cool to watch in the beginning. Sit back, eat some popcorn and enjoy the show.
> 
> After a while it just becomes pathetic. Especially when kids are involved.
> 
> ...


The show does get old and the popcorn does become stale. They cant learn from the mistake because there own false pride wont even allow them to realize they are the key to the mistakes to begin with, not everyone else.


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## Thundarr (Jul 4, 2012)

honcho said:


> The show does get old and the popcorn does become stale. They cant learn from the mistake because there own false pride wont even allow them to realize they are the key to the mistakes to begin with, not everyone else.


Being a betrayed spouse makes a lot of people grow. Things like 'we can't control others' become blatantly obvious. Wayward spouses don't have that benefit. Not only are they too busy rationalizing their actions but they also are riding an emotional power trip for a while. But eventually the new wears off of their shiny turd and they have no tools to deal with it yet again.


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

Like I say in the usual karma thread that pops up every few months, I don't believe in karma. If something happens to the XWS, then its just a coincidence.

If you believe in karma, then that means that you deserved to be cheated on because of something that you did. I know I didn't deserved to be cheated on in both my marriages.


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## larry.gray (Feb 21, 2011)

I don't think it's TOTALLY coincidence. Many who have affairs have bad judgement and make poor choices. When it's a pattern that is repeated, it leads to bad things happening.

It's not that they have bad luck, it's that their good luck eventually runs out and their bad choices catch up to them.


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

larry.gray said:


> I don't think it's TOTALLY coincidence. Many who have affairs have bad judgement and make poor choices. When it's a pattern that is repeated, it leads to bad things happening.
> 
> It's not that they have bad luck, it's that their good luck eventually runs out and their bad choices catch up to them.


:iagree:

A lot of it is poor decision making skills and not karma.


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## Squeakr (May 1, 2013)

lordmayhem said:


> Like I say in the usual karma thread that pops up every few months, I don't believe in karma. If something happens to the XWS, then its just a coincidence.
> 
> If you believe in karma, then that means that you deserved to be cheated on because of something that you did. I know I didn't deserved to be cheated on in both my marriages.


Not sure where I stand on this ideal, but have had the same thoughts about if Karma is true and exists, then what have I done in the past that was so heinous as to merit this pain and suffering I have been given (as it must be something if Karma is true, or does Karma pay one back in spades and then some)??


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## Thundarr (Jul 4, 2012)

lordmayhem said:


> :iagree:
> 
> A lot of it is poor decision making skills and not karma.


The betrayed can take solace that what goes around comes around but I don't think it's a good idea. I'm not comfortable being a victim so why set my self up to be a victim of fate. What if the WS doesn't get theirs so then we've set ourselves up for yet another reason to feel screwed over?

I'll just say this, for every WS who didn't pay a price later on for their selfish or naive decisions, there are 10 who do pay a price. Some pay it within months, other within years, but some WS feel the weight of what they've done and become better people. I think that anyway even though I haven't seen it .


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## honcho (Oct 5, 2013)

lordmayhem said:


> :iagree:
> 
> A lot of it is poor decision making skills and not karma.


:iagree:

And this is why the mess got created in the first place.


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## ThePheonix (Jan 3, 2013)

Cinema79 said:


> Brief story:
> 
> 
> 
> - 7 months later, she sees me with my new hotter, thinner, prettier, smarter, nice, accomplished girlfriend. I've also gained 10lbs of muscle, got a job at a Fortune 500 company and make great money and moved two hours away to the prettiest town in our state. Guess who isn't "poor" and "skinny" any more?


Probably because you got rid of that harpy and your mind began working better.


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## vellocet (Oct 18, 2013)

imjustwatching said:


> Do you guys have any karma story about the cheating x wife (


Yup. She is now with a guy who doesn't trust her and controls her every move. She is in hell and scared of him.


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## CantePe (Oct 5, 2011)

*Re: Re: karma XWW*



Dyokemm said:


> Karma does not exist as most people think or assume it does.
> 
> When something happens and it appears to our eyes as an occurrence of karma coming home to roost, a deeper analysis will reveal that it is most likely the result of continued sh*tty behavior and decision making by the WS after the M ends.
> 
> ...


I completely agree as this is what is happening to a supposed friend who stabbed me in the back while smiling to my face last month. Burnt bridges and all.


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## lostmyreligion (Oct 18, 2013)

Thundarr said:


> I'm not comfortable being a victim so why set my self up to be a victim of fate. What if the WS doesn't get theirs so then we've set ourselves up for yet another reason to feel screwed over?.


I *SO* agree with this.


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## Augusto (Aug 14, 2013)

Never make a karma wishing list. Just improve yourself. Don't make her want you or make her wish she never left you. Move on and let her live her life and you live yours. If she wants you later, tell her it was over when she checked out.


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## FormerSelf (Apr 21, 2013)

My best friend had a high school sweetheart that he ADORED for a few years. They had made all sorts of plans for the future, so it was a shock to him when he found out she was warming up to another guy. It CRUSHED my friend, so he moved on, living life and travelled the world in the military.

Years later they reconnect and the old feelings blossom, so marriage date is set, dresses are made, cake is baked, and day of marriage arrives, except my best friend did not arrive. Left her waiting in the chapel. I don't know if I should paint this as karma, but I know for a fact that wouldn't have happened if she hadn't broken his heart years earlier.


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## Mr.Fisty (Nov 4, 2014)

i don't believe in karma either. 

I've seen some sh1tty people have good lives, and some good people live poorly. 

I figure for your best chance to improve your life, you have to create the circumstances to help you get there. 

Broken people will make poorer choices. Most of the ws don't seek help for their destructive behavior, they are not self-aware enough.

I do believe on how self-aware you are. 

Knowing your strength and weaknesses can help you improve many factors in your life. You can eliminate your weaknees, minimize it, or turn it into a strength.


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## Mr.Fisty (Nov 4, 2014)

Also, waiting for something to happen to someone else, is bad form. That means your too focus on them. They have power over you still when your focus on them. Indifference is winning.


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## TDSC60 (Dec 8, 2011)

I do believe in "karma" to a certain extent. But I also believe that if you waste your time watching and hoping for it to happen, it will not.

When you have moved on and build a new, better life and are concentrating on that, you will hear through the grapevine that the "karma" bus has hit.

So don't dwell on it, don't wish for it, don't expect it. It will happen in time and you will just think of it as an ironic situation and forget it.


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## vellocet (Oct 18, 2013)

Mr.Fisty said:


> i don't believe in karma either.



Oh I do. Not that its some mystical force that evens out the scales of justice, but rather that if someone is sh!tty to others, that will come back to them once they get sh!tty with the wrong people.

A POS will get whats coming to them sooner or later.


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## GROUNDPOUNDER (Mar 8, 2013)

Karma is just another word for cause and effect.

The WS made bad choices to cheat, then get caught. The cause.

The BS BS leaves them, or they leave the BS. The effect.

If the ex-WS continues to make bad choices there will may be more negative effect in the future. The karma.

A person would be better served if they just waited for vs. dreamed about and even planned for that "karma". "As ye sows so shall ye reap" type of thing.

About 2 years after my ex and I D'd, I went to pick our Daughter up at my ex's house. I knew that she and her 2nd husband had been having problems.

While I waited for my Daughter to get her things, my ex started telling me how she thought her husband had been seeing another woman. I just listened, silently. I still feel to this day that my ex was giving me a chance to gloat in her marital problems and then tell her "I told ya so". And man, did I want to.

I opened the front door and sent my Daughter to go to my car. When I turned back to my ex, looked her right in the eyes and said "I know exactly how you feel", turned away and closed the door behind me.

I know that I should have said nothing before I left. I wanted to give it to her with both barrels. I'm pretty good with come backs and one liners. I decided I would just tell her the truth and let her figure it out.

I imagined as she watched me drive down her driveway with our Daughter, she had most likely broke down into tears. I found it strangely unsatisfying and unfulfilling. 

I then thought back to when I realized that I had been replaced and she had moved on. I wished with all my heart that she would end up miserable. Well, be careful what you wish for. She had a miserable 7 year marriage. Then when they finally got divorced, she threw him out, then took him back. They still live together.

She says it's because neither can afford to live on there own. I say it's because misery enjoys company.

Through all this my Daughter had to endure countless arguing and fighting between those two. Yes, my ex was miserable, but at what cost.

After a few years I found my self wishing that my ex would have ended up with a good looking Doctor and lived happily ever after. Then my Daughter could have been sitting on the sidelines of an entirely different game...


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Most of the posters who have had ex wayward spouses come to them and apologize or admit they were wrong have said the same thing....that they were surprised to find they found no joy in their ex-spouse's misery.  Almost to a man/woman this has been the case.

Morituri's XWW was banging a drug dealer and he filmed it. Mori found the video on her computer and got to see his wife doing porno sex with the OM. 

Mori filed for divorce and kicked her to the curb. She went off the deep end, and ended up having to spend a month or so in a mental ward. By the time she got herself straightened out Mori had found her replacement. 

When she came back to him, begging for him to give her a second chance, he had to inform her he had already moved on to another woman. He says she was absolutely devastated and he felt no joy or satisfaction in it.


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## IIJokerII (Apr 7, 2014)

bandit.45 said:


> Most of the posters who have had ex wayward spouses come to them and apologize or admit they were wrong have said the same thing....that they were surprised to find they found no joy in their ex-spouse's misery. Almost to a man/woman this has been the case.
> 
> Morituri's XWW was banging a drug dealer and he filmed it. Mori found the video on her computer and got to see his wife doing porno sex with the OM.
> 
> ...


These people are better than I. How about your bandit? Did you or would you get satisfaction from seeing your' ex's downfall. I can't say I am waiting for it but I will take some pleasure in it to say the least. Most would call that being bitter, I call it icing on the cake.


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

IIJokerII said:


> These people are better than I. How about your bandit? Did you or would you get satisfaction from seeing your' ex's downfall. I can't say I am waiting for it but I will take some pleasure in it to say the least. Most would call that being bitter, I call it icing on the cake.


No. My ex is doing fine. And no, I would not want to see anything bad happen to her.


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## IIJokerII (Apr 7, 2014)

bandit.45 said:


> No. My ex is doing fine. And no, I would not want to see anything bad happen to her.


Did you think this way at first or did you let it go over time?


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## thummper (Dec 19, 2013)

FormerSelf said:


> My best friend had a high school sweetheart that he ADORED for a few years. They had made all sorts of plans for the future, so it was a shock to him when he found out she was warming up to another guy. It CRUSHED my friend, so he moved on, living life and travelled the world in the military.
> 
> Years later they reconnect and the old feelings blossom, so marriage date is set, dresses are made, cake is baked, and day of marriage arrives, except my best friend did not arrive. *Left her waiting in the chapel.* I don't know if I should paint this as karma, but I know for a fact that wouldn't have happened if she hadn't broken his heart years earlier.


So what was the point of that? Just for revenge? I believe in karma, but not cruelty. That was just plain sh!tty on his part.


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## IIJokerII (Apr 7, 2014)

thummper said:


> So what was the point of that? Just for revenge? I believe in karma, but not cruelty. That was just plain sh!tty on his part.


Yeah, This is extremely cruel and not defined under the "Karma" law whatsoever. The reason for this guy's failed relationship during the high school years is called restless youth, not immoral acts towards others, quite frankly, people in their late teens simply do not have the know how or experience of what a loving and lasting relationship is supposed to be like, let alone sustain. 

Him leaving her at the chapel despite his willingness to rekindle feelings is completely bad on him. Kinda pisses me off to tell you the truth.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

IIJokerII said:


> Yeah, This is extremely cruel and not defined under the "Karma" law whatsoever. The reason for this guy's failed relationship during the high school years is called restless youth, not immoral acts towards others, quite frankly, people in their late teens simply do not have the know how or experience of what a loving and lasting relationship is supposed to be like, let alone sustain.
> 
> Him leaving her at the chapel despite his willingness to rekindle feelings is completely bad on him. Kinda pisses me off to tell you the truth.


He was still a child in the body of a man. And not a nice person. At all.


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

IIJokerII said:


> Did you think this way at first or did you let it go over time?


Never did wish any evil on her. I just wanted to end it.


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## IIJokerII (Apr 7, 2014)

bandit.45 said:


> Never did wish any evil on her. I just wanted to end it.


This is fascinating since I believe, correct me if I am wrong, you discovered the Affair, threw Divorce on the table and less than a week later she flew over to SD to, as you put it, "Mate with the OM", 21 years down the drain. I take it you were devoid of the false R, lying, and all that other happy crap? I do not know, sorry to intrude, just opinionated questions.


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## toolforgrowth (Apr 24, 2012)

It's gotta be said: don't waste your life waiting for it to happen. That's no way to spend your valuable time.

The adage of "the best revenge is living a good life" really does apply. My XWW is engaged and about to get married to her third husband at the tender age of 31 (not to her xAP, a different guy). I consider myself lucky in that her fiancee is actually a pretty good guy, so when my daughter is with them, I know she's loved and cared for. That is a HUGE stress reliever for me.

But whenever I see her (which is very few and far between) I can see the regret written all over her face. She doesn't talk much and rarely smiles. She totally dominated me during the M, but once I discovered her affair I re-discovered my testicles, manned up, kicked her out of my life, and rebuilt my life from the ground up. It's kinda funny...I begged her to give us another chance when our M was falling apart and she said she didn't have any faith that I would change. But I did. I got my mojo with women back; I became super-dad; I became way more social and started making new friends and having a ton of fun; and this year, I got my dream job making a $h!t ton more money. All the things she didn't believe I would ever achieve, I did. And she can't be around to reap those benefits because of her cheating.

Example: In August I was chatting with my XWW about scheduling mutual vacations; she went camping with her family and I was taking a trip with a FWB (who's now just a friend, no benefits, as I have a GF now) to the East Coast for a few days. After getting the logistics for her trip nailed down, I asked my her if she would like to have our daughter while I was gone during my trip. She immediately stopped replying to my messages and didn't get back to me until the next day. When she did, she was very dry and business-like.

The last time I saw her was after Halloween to pick up our daughter. She knows I'm seeing someone, so she chose to wear tight yoga pants and be all cheery at my door (first time she's been cheery around me in years). I got a good chuckle after she left.

The point is that while I think her life now is okay, all the things she complained about while being married to me are still present in her life; her and her fiancee are broke (she told me herself, while I'm doing a lot better financially than she is); she still isn't living in her "dream house" (the house she lives in now is much older and run down than my house, which was the marital home); she has more kids to take care of now (her fiancee has two kids from a prior marriage, and she has two); and because of her shenanigans, my ex step daughter has chosen to live primarily with her father.

Her life isn't "bad", but it's not all that and a bag of chips either. They struggle to get by, her kids are gone from her a lot of the time, and from what I hear she's developed some "health problems" (don't know what, don't care what they are). Comparatively, my life is a lot better, and I'm much happier with her gone. She senses it. THAT's her karma. But you sitting around and waiting for it to happen won't actually cause it to occur.


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## FormerSelf (Apr 21, 2013)

thummper said:


> So what was the point of that? Just for revenge? I believe in karma, but not cruelty. That was just plain sh!tty on his part.


I was actually out of contact with my friend all this time, so I was pretty shocked myself when he told me the story several years later. He felt pretty horrible about what he had done, not out of revenge, but he explained that he lived pretty wild in his world travels after being heartbroken...so much so that he wasn't the same person anymore...that he had become warped and he just couldn't go through with getting married. I helped him with mustering the courage to speak and apologize to her parents years later. Good news is that they both moved on and are quite happily married.

I don't think she at all deserved what happened, but I do recall how crushed he was. It was the last day of high school...and he takes me down to say hi to his girlfriend (as I had just came back from out of the country after being gone for a year) and suddenly he notices she is wearing a half-heart necklace. He had already signed up for the military and they dreamed up what young couple dreamed, but obviously she wasn't ready to be that serious. My friend didn't lose it on her...but he was devastated...but when he went overseas...BOOM! That's when we lost contact and I didn't see him or hear from him for probably 5 years.


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