# Hubby in MLC and I'm Frustrated



## Cat3CatGirl (Jun 19, 2012)

Anyone survive partner's MLC?

I am going INSANE!!! He is definitely in MLC, but our problems started long ago. We've never had much in common. We enjoy being with each other, but don't have any of the same interests. Then we had kids. He went off to do his own things and I let him. Didn't want to rock the boat or make him feel controlled. This allowed us to grow apart and me to grow bitter. We separated in Jan this year and he had an affair (we agreed not to date, just to reflect and work on ourselves). We've been back together for about 2 months, but things are still up in the air.

We are both in our early 40s. I've had mild depression for about 5 years and am probably having a mild mid life "transition." Not crisis mode, but a time where I'm reflecting and making changes. A few years ago I went on antidepressants and started to feel better, but not really good. Thought about divorce, but just didn't feel like our problems were significant enough to warrant divorce. We don't fight, don't yell, don't hit, don't blame where not appropriate, still have good sex, still have dates. But we're not really emotionally intimate (but trying to improve there).

His MLC makes things soooo much worse. We are both entertaining thoughts of divorce (him more than me - but I'm getting there for sure). We're learning that we have different priorities. Maybe those priorities are somewhat compatible, if other aspects of our relationship had been taken care of all along. But those aspects have been neglected for a long time.

Have any of you survived your H's MLC still married? Especially if the marital problems started long before MLC?


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