# Tips for Managing Your Anger in Marriage



## Administrator

As much as you love your spouse, they’re going to drive you crazy once in a while. A relationship is a coming together of two people – two individuals – so it only makes sense that you’ll butt heads once in a while. When you and your spouse aren’t seeing eye to eye and you’re starting to see red, take a step back and utilize some of these tips for managing your anger.

*Why Is It Important to Deal with Anger?*

Anger is a normal human emotion and sometimes it is going to be directed at your spouse or your family. Though you can’t completely prevent anger from popping up from time to time, you can learn coping skills to prevent it from harming your marriage. Not only is managing anger one of the most difficult skills you’ll have to learn, but it is also one of the most important. If you don’t learn to deal with your anger, you might bottle it up inside where it will eventually turn to bitterness and then to contempt. That is a surefire way to poison a marriage. So, do your spouse and yourself a favor and take steps now to learn how to manage your anger.

*Tips for Arguing Effectively and Learning to Manage Anger*

Conflict is inevitable in any relationship, not just in a marriage. If you think about it, you can probably remember a time when you were angry with your best friend or a sibling. Conflict is usually caused by differences between two people which can contribute to situations that become frustrating. If you don’t deal with the conflict and the resulting frustration, it can turn to anger and that can turn into a fight. 

Being part of a partnership like marriage means working together with your spouse in all things – even when you don’t see eye to eye. Your marriage will be much stronger in the long run if, early on, you can learn how to express your anger and deal with conflict effectively so it doesn’t fester. Here are some tips to keep in mind the next time you and your spouse face a conflict:



Be open about your emotions – don’t assume that your spouse knows how you feel. The first step in resolving conflict is laying all your cards out on the table.

Try to avoid placing blame or making accusatory statements. It might seem silly but using “I-statements” can be very helpful in this situation.

Focus on the current issue – don’t go dredging up the past or you might end up in a bigger fight that doesn’t actually resolve the issue.

Be open to proposing and accepting solutions – if there is a specific issue, come to the table with a possible solution. And be ready to compromise!

Accept that you can’t change your spouse (or yourself). You can only change how both of you act and how you respond to each other’s actions.

Know when to end the argument. When both of you have aired your grievances and you’ve come to a solution (or agreed to disagree), let that be the end of it.

Marriage is difficult, that is no secret. You might love your spouse more than life itself, but that doesn’t mean they won’t make you angry from time to time. When conflict arises, you and your spouse should be open and honest with each other to work through the issue – you’ll be much stronger for it.

VS Glen, Community Support


----------

