# Execute superhot, sexy fantasy with wife and other or not….



## cub!chy (May 7, 2012)

My wife lived maybe a crisis, at 30, not sure, and then found the Shades of Grey books and just went crazy. She opened up sexually, we grew really close together, she told me of all her thoughts and perceptions on sexuality, and things have been great. I am HD and she used to be LD, but this has now changed, she is now HD, as she has confided in me what she wants to do. We have bought toys, gone on 3 month binges, pretty much done it all under the sun. She is now 33 and I am 38, we have 3 kids, less than 7 years old. We have been to strip clubs together and also visited just to look at some BDSM sex clubs, crazy what goes on in there. I don’t care for the BDSM stuff, but she loves it. So I do it for her, I am more vanilla, but I can be aggressive, which she likes. She sleeps naked and basically I can get it anytime, anyplace at any frequency and so can she, we are each other HO’s. She is a great mom and the best wife in the world; we love and respect each other greatly. 
So this brings me to this issue, she drank a bit the other day after the kids went to sleep and was very kinky. After the kink, she asked me about my fantasy and you all can guess I am a guy; it’s a threesome with her and another woman. She knows this and won’t do it, because she won’t share me, but asked about my second. That’s easy, not sure if it’s the same for others, but I would love to see my wife making out with another woman and sucking each other breasts. They then both provide oral to me, one on my p!nis and the other on my b0lls, that’s heaven for men, at least for me. I then finish myself off on both of them while they kiss. This is the hottest imagery that comes to mind after a threesome, more than any porn or anything else. And it’s not me and 2 other women, that doesn’t do it for me, my wife has to be in it. What blows me away is that she confided that she has been curios about being with another woman, she won’t elaborate, just says she has felt curious in the past. So she said yes, that she’s willing to do this for me, of her own free will, as long as I don’t touch the OW. I asked her the following day and we have discussed it at length and we are both crystal clear on the details and boundaries. We actually tried it while in the Caribbean a few months ago, but couldn’t execute. So I brought up the idea of hiring an escort and she was ok with that, that’s more direct than trying it at a club and more controlled. 
Anyway here are my issues, I dated her for 1 year and have been married for 13 years. We are both educated and intelligent; and I have thought thorough the pros and cons. Our relationship id very solid. First I would like to hear from anyone that has done something like this? How did it go, how did you feel afterwards, both partners? Anyone else close to this, realizing a fantasy or has experience with bringing in a 3rd person the marriage for 1 experience? Please provide details and the experiences, not just open-ended opinions. I have been reading this list for years, so I am clear on all the failed threesome experiences and bringing a 3rd party to the marriage. This is much more controlled and limited. Pardon the length.


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## missymrs80 (Aug 5, 2012)

First thing that came to mind was a girl i knew who had a herpes outbreak all in her mouth and throat. It was awful.
Hopefully the prostitute you get doesnt have this.


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## Snookums (Nov 6, 2012)

Never had this experience nor want to but anything I've ever read about it bringing brought into a marriage never ended well. Usually lots of doubt & trust issues developed in the marriage but just relaying what I've seen & read.


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## Hicks (Jan 14, 2011)

She's giving you your fantasy so she can have her fantasy.

Which will be having sex with another man.


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## Zatol Ugot? (Mar 5, 2012)

Though some may beg to differ, chances are very high that this will not end well.


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## 40isthenew20 (Jul 12, 2012)

While it sounds amazing and is obviously every guy's fantasy (mine included), I would tread very carefully when it is your wife and mother of your children involved. This can take on a life of it's own and the road may be where neither of you want to go. 

Just curious as to some of the details as to your attempt in the Caribbean. Thx.


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## MaritimeGuy (Jul 28, 2012)

If you've clearly established your boundaries and are both into it I don't see why not. I would make sure that you make a pact should either one of you wish to back out at any point you can do so no questions asked.


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## MEM2020 (Aug 23, 2009)

What makes sex so special with your wife is that you both value it enough to forgo the temporary delight of being with another. 

You cannot do what you want without diluting and thus devaluing your marriage.


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

Ack. Another one.

If you search around here and do some reading, you'll see that this comes up about every two weeks, and the advice is almost overwhelmingly NOT to do it. There are a few on here who have and who claim it was 'fine' but I would really like to hear from them in a year, five years etc to see whether it didn't come back to bite them in the butt.

There's a thread here that talks about it.

Also, what's the fun for you if you 'don't touch' the other woman?? That isn't going to fulfill what you described as your fantasy.


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## Dad&Hubby (Aug 14, 2012)

There's a reason the phrase "Fantasy vs. reality" exists.

In fantasy, no consequences, no "next day after the thrill", no secondary thoughts exist. Fantasy is about the moment and only the moment.

Reality is different. The consequences and the thoughts that follow are usually bigger than the actual activity.

Some people can live in an open marriage but understand, like ANYTHING else, this is a slippery slope. If you get this, then why can't your wife then make out with another man? Why can't she give oral to a man while you screw her? 

Sit down and do a pros and cons list. I know it sounds too clinical for sex but definitely do it.

Pros - Have 1 more form of hot sex (as if you don't have enough)
Cons - HAHAHA I'll let you fill it in because it's too long for me.


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## TCSRedhead (Oct 17, 2012)

Reality and fantasy exist on separate planes. This starts opening up all sorts of issues. What if she likes oral much better from this woman than you're able to give her? What if the line gets crossed and you do touch her and like that better than your wife (or your wife thinks she does).

My recommendation - go to a strip club together, check out the dancers then go home and continue things via fantasy of talking about who was hot, etc. As soon as you introduce another person in your sex life, things tend to spiral out of control.


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## east2west (Oct 19, 2012)

Hicks said:


> She's giving you your fantasy so she can have her fantasy.
> 
> Which will be having sex with another man.


Yes. This is a risk you may not have thought through. I would talk to her about what she wants in return. Make sure you don't take on a liability you can't handle.


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

How is it 'for him' when he isn't even allowed to touch the OW?? :scratchhead:


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## missymrs80 (Aug 5, 2012)

Hope1964 said:


> How is it 'for him' when he isn't even allowed to touch the OW?? :scratchhead:


Bc he gets blown by the hooker


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## jaharthur (May 25, 2012)

cub!chy said:


> So she said yes, that she’s willing to do this for me, of her own free will, as long as I don’t touch the OW. I asked her the following day and we have discussed it at length and we are both crystal clear on the details and boundaries.


This sounds like he just gets to watch. It sure seems to rule out any oral sex. I suppose he can masturbate while watching.

He could also in the heat of the moment ignore the boundaries set by his wife.


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## humanbecoming (Mar 14, 2012)

How do I love thee?
Let me count the ways:

Hepatitis
Chlamydia
Crabs
HIV
Herpes
HPV


Yeah, an escort sounds swell


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## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

cub!chy said:


> My wife lived maybe a crisis, at 30, not sure, and then found the Shades of Grey books and just went crazy. She opened up sexually, we grew really close together, she told me of all her thoughts and perceptions on sexuality, and things have been great. I am HD and she used to be LD, but this has now changed, she is now HD, as she has confided in me what she wants to do. We have bought toys, gone on 3 month binges, pretty much done it all under the sun. She is now 33 and I am 38, we have 3 kids, less than 7 years old. We have been to strip clubs together and also visited just to look at some BDSM sex clubs, crazy what goes on in there. I don’t care for the BDSM stuff, but she loves it. So I do it for her, I am more vanilla, but I can be aggressive, which she likes. She sleeps naked and basically I can get it anytime, anyplace at any frequency and so can she, we are each other HO’s. She is a great mom and the best wife in the world; we love and respect each other greatly.
> So this brings me to this issue, she drank a bit the other day after the kids went to sleep and was very kinky. After the kink, she asked me about my fantasy and you all can guess I am a guy; it’s a threesome with her and another woman. She knows this and won’t do it, because she won’t share me, but asked about my second. That’s easy, not sure if it’s the same for others, but I would love to see my wife making out with another woman and sucking each other breasts. They then both provide oral to me, one on my p!nis and the other on my b0lls, that’s heaven for men, at least for me. I then finish myself off on both of them while they kiss. This is the hottest imagery that comes to mind after a threesome, more than any porn or anything else. And it’s not me and 2 other women, that doesn’t do it for me, my wife has to be in it. What blows me away is that she confided that she has been curios about being with another woman, she won’t elaborate, just says she has felt curious in the past. So she said yes, that she’s willing to do this for me, of her own free will, as long as I don’t touch the OW. I asked her the following day and we have discussed it at length and we are both crystal clear on the details and boundaries. We actually tried it while in the Caribbean a few months ago, but couldn’t execute. So I brought up the idea of hiring an escort and she was ok with that, that’s more direct than trying it at a club and more controlled.
> Anyway here are my issues, I dated her for 1 year and have been married for 13 years. We are both educated and intelligent; and I have thought thorough the pros and cons. Our relationship id very solid. First I would like to hear from anyone that has done something like this? How did it go, how did you feel afterwards, both partners? Anyone else close to this, realizing a fantasy or has experience with bringing in a 3rd person the marriage for 1 experience? Please provide details and the experiences, not just open-ended opinions. I have been reading this list for years, so I am clear on all the failed threesome experiences and bringing a 3rd party to the marriage. This is much more controlled and limited. Pardon the length.



http://talkaboutmarriage.com/sex-marriage/58606-threesomes-so-fourth.html

Hope you enjoy!


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## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

Sorry, no experience with it. But I'm going on record to state that it's a bad idea to bring a third into your marriage. I don't care how "controlled" the hook up would be nor do I care about how emotionally secure, mature or sophisticated you and your wife thinks that you are. The bottom line is that a 3rd person in the bedroom is playing with fire. Even if you have a successful hook up, it's still a risk that isn't worth taking. JMHO, and I'll stop posting in your thread unless you engage me directly with a response.


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## jacksparow1964 (Sep 28, 2012)

first: at one time your age i was crazy about the idea which never happened due to wife never liked it and then all kind of sick fantasies filled my head till this moment  ,,, fantasy (sick one) should stay a fantasy. 
second: you both sound like a simple people with spontaneous attitude , and this 
where the problem come from, the emotions which will take place when you are engaged in this extra ordinary experience shall have a negative reaction on you both it will be very shocking for both of you and nobody can predict what will happen after, this is very risking move from your side for little pleasure period totally not worth it, family life is the greatest gift for all of us better we maintain healthy and strong, finaly this might work for some people but definitly not in your case ,,,, have a happy and secured life


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## Stonewall (Jul 5, 2011)

Don't do this!


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## farmerswife (Nov 7, 2012)

This is a fantasy that my husband and I have both had but neither of us have experienced either alone or together (it is something we only were only interested in doing together). We also were just in the Caribbean in October where we had fun pointing out to each other the women that we thought were hot and would enjoy sharing. We never made it a point to hunt one down and bring her to the room. Well, my husband found a woman that he was attracted to (it's funny that our types are polar opposites; he like brunettes with nice big round asses and I like blondes with a slender figure and big tits) and spent a lot of time chatting with her while I sunbathed. Eventually he brought her over to meet me. I could tell he was attracted to her in the settle way he flirted with her so I began to flirt with her as well. I think it really turned him on to see me flirt with her. We all made plans to meet up after dinner at the resorts evening events. As my husband and I walked back to the room to get ready for the evening we had playful talk about what we would do with and to her if given the opportunity. I got ready all along still teasing each others sexual side. We left the room and as we walked to the restaurant I could feel his mood changing. I asked him what was wrong and he said " I just want to make sure you love me." I stopped him and looked him dead in the eye and said "If you have to question it I don't want to do anything with her." I completely meant it and at that point I knew we would not pursue her. I was not mad or upset, I still had my man by my side and did not need her to have a good time with him. End of story, book closed, for me....so I thought. He began to continue on a downward spiral of jealousy saying that I was a lesbian and that I was horrible for wanting to share him and I was only worried about her and getting dressed up for her. (I wore *his* favorite dress and heels that night and never once asked him if I thought she would approve. Nor did I emphasize anything about how excited I was or how I couldn't wait. It was never a done deal with her...we still had to do all the tracking!) Anyway, I ate dinner as fast as I could because I was so embarrassed and upset that he was taking such a turn for the worse. _He was the one that brought her to me!_ We went straight back to the room (of course luck would have it that we pass her) I was crying and he was fuming! I went straight to bed, the next morning he apologized for jumping off the jealousy cliff. He just got scared. I felt even worse for aiding him in feeling so uncertain about us. I told him I was not upset and that I would never want him to be jealous of anyone. He was that only one for me in life. Later that day while doing our usual lounging in the pool (my eyes were completely shut off to the bounty of boobies on the beach) he began our game again. I told him that I was not even entertaining looking because I did not want him to feel bad. After some coaxing that everything was fine he got me back to playing. 

That was when I realized that there are two sexual worlds we live in; fantasy and reality. One where outrageous acts and being spontaneous and crazy is *safe* and one that it is only meant for two. I enjoy visiting fantasy (and often) but I really love our reality and I don't want to ruin it.

I hope that my "almost" experience helps you with your decision...I guess the moral of my story is that things can change in a really, really quick nano-second and sometimes it can be too late to fix it. I don't know what would have happened if we had gone through with it and he got jealous while we were in the "act". I don't think it would have been fixable at that point and that is a very scary thought.


I found this forum when I did a google search for "going to a strip club with your husband". We are planning on going _tonight_ and I worry that even though it was his idea that we will have another jealousy explosion. (I did find a thread that I was looking for but being a rookie to all forums I commented on that YEAR old thread instead of creating my own so that is my next stop. Without taking thunder away from THIS thread visit mine and give me some advice if you have it.


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## Catherine602 (Oct 14, 2010)

You have a wife that is finally opening up top you sexually. Sounds wonderful. 

It is interesting that the newness of enjoying each other is not even a year old and you are trying to get OW in the mix. I don't think that it is wise.

Have you fully explored sexual intimacy with your wife to any extent before considering adding another level of complexity?

Be careful - one of you needs to keep their head to protect each other and the family. 

Don't be shortsighted, and turn this boon into a bust.


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## cub!chy (May 7, 2012)

Thanks to all for the responses, you have brought up some ideas that I may need to re-think. I will try to answer some of your questions. The Caribbean adventure, we were at a poor country where our location was severely patrolled for working girls and we could not get one or even a local. We really didn’t try that hard, but both loved the adventure and thrill. To clarify, the fantasy is seeing my wife make out with a woman and doing breast play between both, they then both do oral to me and I masturbate on both of them while they kiss. That’s it. The only contact is kissing between wife and OW and oral to me by OW, so STDS are minimalized. The boundaries are clearly established. My wife won’t touch the OW in any other way and I won’t touch the OW at all, I don’t really want to. I mentioned a threesome in my original post, but even if my wife agreed, which she won’t, I won’t do it, as many have said it too risky. Some of posters have mentioned jealousy, I won’t feel any, as I have seen her get multiple lap dances by male strippers and I am ok with it. She is curious about kissing another woman, so she gets hers. I asked her about doing a MFM threesome or some other escalation and it’s not something she wants. There was only one poster with an actual experience on this; I am hoping to hear from others that actually lived this. My only real concern is what one poster said about my wife finally opening up sexually and I not exploring it completely, but instead rushing to a 3rd party. That is causing me to rethink entirely or delay this option. But the fantasy is so darn HOT, walking away from it, you need some iron calls. Thanks all!


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## jaharthur (May 25, 2012)

So the OW fellating you is OK because you aren't touching her, she's touching you? Then it should be OK for the OW to have cowgirl sex with you, too, because she's touching you, you're not touching her.

Interesting definitions!


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