# Friend Died



## TikiKeen

My friends took their annual anniversary vacation this week. While there, the H suddenly and traumatically died, the day after their anniversary.

I haven't been as physically close (seeing them often etc) as I had been, neither had H, and that doesn't matter. It hurts, and I can't imagine the pain the W is feeling now. This was the last thing anyone in our circle of friends expected.

They're the best example of a happy marriage I've ever seen. I'm heartbroken for her. I'm also resolved to do every single thing I can to improve my marriage, as is H. It's hit us both hard. We've already done some work (edited to add: over the past few months), but had a brief talk today reminding ourselves why we became friends with this couple: we wanted what they have...a fantastic marriage.

I'd like to think H would be thrilled to know that his joy in life and overwhelming love, compassion and devotion to his wife was the example we are using to learn to be the same way ourselves. 

We plan on doing whatever the W asks to support her right now, and always. My friends who are widows have offered some amazing insight and guidance today so that I don't step on toes or hurt feelings.

I'm so sad.


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## mablenc

I'm sorry for your loss, it's understandable that you are shocked and sadden. What a tragedy! 

Hugs


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## omgitselaine

My condolences.


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## manticore

so sorry


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## 2ntnuf

I am sorry for your loss.


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## soccermom2three

I'm so sorry for your loss.


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## bkaydezz

Really so sorry for everyone. 

Death has its way of bringing out some good in us.

Hopefully she will find a healthy way to cope!!!


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## EleGirl

How sad. Sorry for your loss.


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## heartsbeating

Very sad .....I'm extremely sorry.


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## TikiKeen

His wife has arranged a community jam in his honor later this month (he was a musician and Episcopal Deacon), and they've decided on private burial and public memorial. Seems right in line with how they lived: great boundaries.


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## manticore

between my lurking when I was in my most misogynistic phase in my life (after years of standing the craziness of my mother) I ended in a page dedicated for women who had lost their husbands, the things I saw written there made me cry and regain a little of faith in marriage again, I am really sorry about your friend lost, I know that there really are marriages that are close to perfect and I can not imagine the lost that your friend is feeling.


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## Omego

That is so very sad. My condolences.


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## imtamnew

Very sorry. My condolences.


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## Lifer

I'm very sorry for your loss. Your friend will certainly need your love and support. She may have a hard time letting you know how to help. Some times, we have to take some risk, and find a way to help. You talking with her, and showing your love by just being there will mean a great deal to her.


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## over20

Lifer said:


> I'm very sorry for your loss. Your friend will certainly need your love and support. She may have a hard time letting you know how to help. Some times, we have to take some risk, and find a way to help. You talking with her, and showing your love by just being there will mean a great deal to her.


:iagree: Sometimes just being a listening ear does wonders for the grieving heart.


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## xakulax

You have my deepest and heartfelt condolences I know how you're feeling right now as I am to dealing with the loss of a friend may the love of those around you help you through the days ahead.


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