# Drive home



## Shooboomafoo (Mar 30, 2011)

Lately because the financial situation has been so bad, and growth at work has been nonexistent, Ive carried with me a constant desperation to do something about my situation. Looking at new job opportunities, has me scared to death in terms of it only lasting a short time and being let go, (was here at my current job for 16yrs), wondering if it will be something I will like, because I dont want to jump ship purely for financial reasons... I havent enjoyed life lately, and the divorce has the feeling of failure requiring constant suppression. Having a very hard time keeping on top of credit card bills, but also, am watching people be promoted and given raises here at work, while I stagnate and perform job functions that no one in the company including the CEO is familiar with, thus, they get viewed as minimal and requiring little expertise. Aside from the misrepresentation of the value of my job, I have figures of authority achieving their own career objectives by influencing the perception of the value of the job functions I perform..

Knowing all this, feeling stuck, watching these same naysayers able to be promoted and advanced, has me screaming quietly for fairness, for some universal hand to reach down and point me in the right direction.


Yesterday on my drive home, with these things weighing heavily on me, I noticed at a stop light that I was right behind my ex-wife's car. She was turning into the old subdivision we lived at for thirteen years. Off to the old marital home, with her live in piece of sheist. She might as well have been just another stranger on the street, and that panged me a bit. 

Down to the last few bucks before payday again mid week next week, and I pick up my daughter this evening for her oncoming week with me.


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## Shooboomafoo (Mar 30, 2011)

One particular person I used to work with, who has unfairly been promoted to my supervisor, which in itself was a demotion, but "sole proprietors" have no clue at all how to run a business outside of self-service... but this guy has been heard trying to smear me, by using my recent divorce as a means to say Ive been a negative influence and was like a black cloud looming around..

Ive not let this situation with the divorce cause me to act like that, so you can see where things are being used to impress the CEO that theres issues with me. 

Im tired of struggling.. I guess thats all I had to say today.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Sorry to hear you are feeling down.

Get your resume together and start sending it out places, Shoo.

Smile, hell, wink, at a hot chick. It's the little things


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## notreadytoquit (Jan 11, 2010)

Hey Shoo do you have a profile on LinkedIn? If you don't you should. It's the go to place for recruiters and for job seekers. If you are not familiar drop me a message and I will explain more. Don't forget you are not the only one struggling. I am 2 years post divorce with autistic child and I have not even had time to deal with all my emotions


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## Corpuswife (Apr 24, 2009)

I would like to strongly encourage you to begin looking at other avenues! First, a change would be good. Second, you know your room for growth may be limited (after 16 years) after all of these years. Third, no longer should be be tied to our jobs. It used to be a place of loyalty but really, as I have learned, there is none. If they can't afford; don't need you; then they will can you azz. I have never been "canned" but I tell you I have worked with my last employer that didn't hesitate. 

Good luck and happy hunting!


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## stillhoping (Aug 27, 2012)

try to remember that this is a time of opportunity, not discouragement. Get out there and smile


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## moco82 (Jul 16, 2012)

Oh, the stagnation because no one knows exactly what your duties involve. Screw them, quit and let them appreciate what it involves for a few Fridays at 10pm after your departure! 

The longer you stay, the harder (psychologically) it would be to change jobs. I was doubting whether I had any skills beyond my multi-year repertoire at one point as well, until taking increasing financial responsibility prodded me to take the plunge only to discover it was something I should have done a few years earlier. Longer hours and higher pressure, but of the good kind: to apply your talents where they'd produce more return and get rewarded significantly more. (Because you don't get rewarded for having talent, but for results after applying it.)

The toughest part is stopping paying attention to labels and job descriptions and starting thinking about what actions you'd be taking there, which parts of your brain would get activated there, and not worrying about being evaluated/compensated for the work done until the work is done. That last part may be hard to guarantee ahead of time at large corporate bureaucracies, but they're not the job creators these days anyway 

In short, if you're struggling, get out. You'll do great.


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## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

Shoo, I read this the other day and sorta related... my job is going ok at the moment, but the other aspects of life, as you know, are similar. My house is keeping me broke, but the housing market is ridiculous and there honestly is nothing very decent for much less (especially by the time I deduct lawyer fees, realty fees, etc) When I bought this house it was in our sweet spot as to price/niceness... and the same way your job is keeping you stagnant my home is keeping me that way...

I think you should be preparing yourself mentally for a major change, even if none happens, be ready to walk out of the door at your old place. A friend from college, whom I wasn't close to until he started working at the same place as me last year, went through what you are now, he was accumulating more and more responsibility, as a draftsmans doing the work of two project managers, half the office managers job and the more they piled on him the more higher ups they were laying off... finally he had enough after they refused to pay Christmas bonuses that year (for some really bogus reason), so he said he was walking - they offered him a 50 cent raise, he laughed in there face, was already only making 90's wages at that place (though lots of OT) and we're in an economic boom here still.

Another friend I know is a welder, was getting mistreated like you are, more and more responsibility, people taking credit for his ideas, he got his inspection ticket and threatened to leave, had a job offer paying twice as much, was leaving and his old company matched the pay rate as the inspection job?! He still took the new job because it was in line with what his career goals were, but after a few months it wasn't working out so he went back to the welding job, at the higher rate.

When you demonstrate you are willing to walk, you can realize your true value to the company, and if they can't acknowledge what you believe your worth to them is, you will be glad to leave anyway.

As to the company my drafting friend left, when he bolted and everyone had to pick up his slack, most of them quit, 2 or 3 drafters and a project manager, plus one of the admin assistants (who also was managing projects - for like $13/hr lol - went on mat and the other one took stress leave). It was a family business that decided to take too many shortcuts, they reaped what they sowed.


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## 2ntnuf (Jul 14, 2012)

He's afraid of you and wants you out of his way. He may hang himself in the process. If the company lets this go on without chastising him, I would surely do the best I could to better myself.


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## Paradise (Dec 16, 2011)

Not making light of this post because I know most of us here are in a similar place (and I have gone through similar battles with a bunch of moron football coaches at my new job), but....all I can think about when I see this post is the movie Office Space.


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