# Ok Ladies, Honest Question



## cdm (Jun 3, 2011)

So now that things are going better in the bedroom with the wife and I, I've been wondering a couple of things concerning orgasms for women.

Some of you might not be able to answer this since, according to the research, an overwhelming percentage of women have never even had an orgasm brought on by penetration. However, for those who have, whats the difference, if any, between being able to orgasm from penetration as opposed to oral sex, or direct stimulation of your cl!t??? Is one better than the other?? 

Also, if so, my next question is this.... Apparently a well endowed man in terms of GIRTH is the way to make orgasm via penetration possible, and I'm simply average (According to all the available research) or even a little below average in that area. So, is there something, in terms of a position, maybe something from the adult store, anything at all that might help her achieve an orgasm through penetration?? Thanks in advance...


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## BigBadWolf (Nov 30, 2009)

I know you asked this to ladies, so while we wait for their help I will speak to this issue.

Mostly penetration orgasm, is "G spot" stimulation, but, and do not miss this, often in missionary position it can also be the man's pelvis stimulation of the clitoris that is as well what can happen.

A woman, such as when the man is laying on his back and his woman on top, she is then often easy to find the perfect movement and position to get the head of her man's penis stimulating her g-spot.

So I say this to help you as well, do not be afraid to let your woman the freedom to achieve her own orgasm, such as putting her on top of you, and let her show you how to do it. 

As far as girth and length, the g-spot is only a few inches inside her vagina, so on that, men should always be confident and spending effort on honing their sexual skills and not so much on effort wondering how long or wide they are.


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## SunnyT (Jun 22, 2011)

My first post/reply!

As a woman, I can say that of those types of orgasms listed, none is better than the other, all of them are awesome. Any one of them is satisfying but more than one of them is heaven!! And all of them are better than "self servicing"!! I can't speak for women who have problems reaching an orgasms tho. 

All I can think of, in terms of assistance for her... its lots of lube, lots of rubbing, and allowing her and encouraging her to do as she will with you. Her on top facing you is wonderful in terms of hitting that G spot, and either of you can easily play with her clitoris in that position. Her on top facing away from you....well, that is just FUN! 

As far as what you can get from the "toy store" for both of your pleasures... flavored lubes (cuz wet, slippery AND edible is the way to go!) and maybe a **** ring. You might have to experiment with a few different ones to find what works for you, but they can increase girth size. 

And maybe.... for women who are opposed to viewing porn, books that describe and picture various positions. Or, look into "tantric sex"....


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## YoungMommy23 (Jun 22, 2011)

I prefer oral stimulation, but being on top facing him can do it the way your wondering about  good luck


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## Enchantment (May 11, 2011)

I've never felt differences between any of the orgasms you listed - maybe I'm just not that sensitive. :scratchhead:

The only time that I notice any difference depends typically on two factors for me: how aroused and in to it I am at that moment, and what time of the month it is. During certain times of the month, it is a lot easier and more explosive than at others. 

If you wanted to give her a bigger girth, you could sometimes go with a strap-on that is larger than you normally are.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

My GF has described a number of different types of orgasms, depending primarily on the types of stimulation she's receiving. Some of them are "sharp", some of them are "spasming" (inside her vagina), some are "whole body".

My point is, I think, that every woman is different. And Lord, I'm grateful for the woman I found!

With regards to size, she's apparently a fan of "just right". Too small (pinky sized) doesn't work, and too big is painful. Anywhere in between and success depends on the user.

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## PHTlump (Jun 2, 2010)

I believe the determining factor on orgasm via penetration only vs. clitoral stimulation is the distance of the clitoris from the vagina. 2.5cm (1in) or less and the woman can probably experience orgasm without direct clitoral stimulation. More than that and it's much more difficult, perhaps impossible.


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

I can cum by penetration, masturbation, and oral. 

I like penetration the best, two bodies tangle together, it is a very intimate feeling. Besides, I like the full feeling. His toy is inside, my pu$$y is full, it is a great feeling. When my husband is thrusting fast and hard, it makes the feeling even more excited, I can't have enough. 

I use to masturbate during the period when I didn't have a man. I haven't masturbated for a long time. I prefer real toy ( his toy). 

I can cum orally, and the orgasm is very strong, it is so strong that I only want it occasionally, once a month the most. When my husband is going down on me, I would rather his tongue focus on my vagina than my clit, too much stimulation on my clit actually doesn't make me feel good, I like the warm and soft feeling on my vagina. 

I think A woman's vagina is very good at adjusting, her size will fit her man's size. What I mean here is: if the woman is only having sex with one man, after spending some time together, her size will fit her man's size, I don't think men need to worry about their sizes. I think erection is more important. As long as you can have good erection and can last for some time, it is all you need. 

Some women need a long time to cum, I really don't think it is the man's fault for not able to make her cum fast. Average men last about ten minutes, few can last for one hour. I believe I am gifted in this area, I can cum in less than a minute if I want to! I think when the woman is in control of sex and know how to focus on her sensitive area and know how to get herself aroused, it is easy to cum. 

I think men have to be affectionate lovers, but please don't bring all the pressure on yourselves. If your spouses want to enjoy sex, they have to do some work too!


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## Laurae1967 (May 10, 2011)

My husband and I were just talking about this today! I think that clitoral stimulation is involved in almost every type of orgasm, including from penetration. When I am really aroused and my cl it has been well-stimulated, I love the feeling of penetration. The walls of my p*ssy feel every thrust and it's great. That type of orgasm (from the thrusting) is my favorite because it feels complete. A cl it orgasm also feels good, but I can have those on my own. But if my husband just stuck it in without any foreplay, it would take a while to feel really good.

So lots of nipple play and cl it play and then penetrate.


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## Jadegreen (Apr 4, 2011)

hmm. I wrote a huge long essay (longer than this) and then thought that was a bit much. So, what I wrote, in short was that, personally, it is better for me to talk about Os in terms of intensity, not from where they start. So a low grade intensity is often centered on my Cl*t, - I'll call that a #1. it's sort of vibrat-y though I like it a lot. It's like eating chips - you want another one right away. A #4 is a black-out - can't see etc. It's a total body experience and I kind of lose the boundaries of time and space. In between is the contractions of a good O - front, vagina and back end all go together. those middle kind sometimes make me grip hair, moan and arch - though not always - they can be quiet. The black-out ones makes me slightly not responsible for my behavior and I get pretty juicy. 

But none of these are stimulated one way or another in particular, although I agree with Laurae1967 that likely all the bigger ones involve everything. The bigger O for sure needs more time and more passion, but time and passion alone do not guarantee the biggest O. I've got to be into it, too - I have to be relaxed, feel like I've got the time, and it helps a lot if it is a good time of month - some weeks a shorted fuse could make me O. Confusing I'm sure when you are trying to figure it out! 

second thing I wrote is that size really does not matter a lot - not that I don't feel it, but what matters is tightness. So, here's an example. If you close your eyes and make a fist, and someone shoves a hot dog into your fist, it might feel tight if your fist is quite closed. But if your fist is very open, even a smokie is not going to feel tight. 

So what I would suggest is that you make her as aroused as possible, meaning as swollen or, as they say as "puffy" as possible, using any means. Then any girth or size you have is going to feel pretty darned good. and if that still doesn't work, then positions where she has her legs more closed will work, or she can practice exercises to maker her more muscular and tight.

another way to think about it - fingers are pretty good for penetration and stimulation, but even the biggest thumb or two fingers is not usually bigger than the smallest man. Mostly it's just magic to feel a guy in you. 

what sometimes happens is that there is very good stimulation in the lead up, but when the intercourse part starts, the stimulation of the women is left behind. If that is an issue then i would suggest a position where you can reach her front end with your hand, and work on her Cl*t while you thrust. if you are too distracted, let her do it. If she can get herself rockin' while you are in her, you will never forget it. 

good luck!


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## Rough Patch Sewing (Apr 18, 2011)

Jadegreen said:


> The bigger O for sure needs more time and more passion, but time and passion alone do not guarantee the biggest O. I've got to be into it, too - I have to be relaxed, feel like I've got the time, and it helps a lot if it is a good time of month - some weeks a shorted fuse could make me O. Confusing I'm sure when you are trying to figure it out!


JG is right! 

When your wife is into it - let her help you know what to do. She'll probably be in tune with it if she's into it.

As a husband that has been my experience, at least.

You might not always know when she is into it too - although when she is REALLY into it, you'll know!

Can you tell your wife that she can give your instructions?

If you are not thrusting or riding high enough, or she wants her legs closed, or she wants oral, G-spot.....

You know I don't think that it makes a husband less of a man to get some play-by-play instructions.

For me feeling her have an O is so incredibly awesome that -

Well, It's the best positive feed back you can get!

Best of luck. Communication is the key!


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## FirstYearDown (Sep 15, 2011)

I am a highly orgasmic woman, so I can cum from both oral and intercourse.

I find that the orgasms with my husband inside me feel more powerful. It's that boa constrictor tightening that my vagina does when I cum. The position doesn't really matter; my orgasms are as copious as snowflakes in the winter.

An orgasm from oral sex or touching is more like a pleasant tickle.


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## monkeyface (Dec 2, 2011)

I really really wish I could orgasm by penetration alone, but it doesn't do anything for me unless accompanied by clitoral stimulation. I don't think it's that important to be able to orgasm by penetration alone...I have mind blowing orgasms, the rock my world kind, by stimulating myself while being penetrated. I know what I want and it takes the pressure off hubby. So I just think as long as you are giving your wife orgasms of any kind then you're good!


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## Rough Patch Sewing (Apr 18, 2011)

monkeyface said:


> So I just think as long as you are giving your wife orgasms of any kind then you're good!


There is a wisdom to be found in these words. 

Her delight should be your delight, and visa versa!

Mutual Sexual Satisfaction in a marriage is a many splendid thing!


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## uhaul4mybaggage (Jul 20, 2010)

When I'm crazy horny, with a lot of build up (foreplay, necking, yadda yadda) I can O just from initial penetration. I have O'd from thinking about sex, no touch. You think only guys have wet dreams? Think again. 

My advice: hands on. All day. Shoulders, foot rubs, hugs, kisses on the neck, back. Grab stuff. If it looks good, grab it. Build that sucker up all day. She'll pop like a balloon. But that's just me.


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## The Nurturer (Jun 27, 2011)

Honestly, focus on how ur wife moves when your penetrating in her.. If her moans become groans and deeper.. I don't think any of us can really give you an answer to exactly what it is that you are requesting, simply because we do not know what type of sex your wife enjoys most. I read most of these posts and noticed that none have mentioned anal penetration. A woman reaches an orgasm quicker when she is penetrated in BOTH anally and vaginal. (Your penis in her vagina and maybe a finger or two massaging INSIDE her anal) I am not a fan of such a thing but when I tried it for the first time I can agree that it does work. With plenty of lubrication and comfort. Especially if it's a first timer.


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

PHTlump said:


> I believe the determining factor on orgasm via penetration only vs. clitoral stimulation is the distance of the clitoris from the vagina. 2.5cm (1in) or less and the woman can probably experience orgasm without direct clitoral stimulation. More than that and it's much more difficult, perhaps impossible.


interesting...... I can see it now all the women On tam now measuring the distance from their clit to their vajvaj . 

:smthumbup:


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

BigBadWolf said:


> As far as girth and length, the g-spot is only a few inches inside her vagina, so on that, men should always be confident and spending effort on honing their sexual skills and not so much on effort wondering how long or wide they are.


This is very very true ^^^ ... Mine is as average as they come, and it works every time-- rocking me to the heavens. Mr. Average - The true story about penis size, from a site that isn't trying to sell you anything.


I have never needed to touch myself in addition to him being inside of me to orgasm. I was so clueless about sex, I never even knew some women need extra stimulation there till I seen this in porn & read about it. 

I do some rhythmic moving around to "get mine", find the positions that feels amazing (3 work for us) and with every pump, I can feel it building & building .... If he is on top , I am grabbing his butt, pushing him down into me, my legs bracing a certain way on his to rock myself or rock him a pleasurable way to get me there . I never let him do all the work- or it would likely not work for me, except for those times we haven't had it in a while & the slow is enough to take you over the edge. 

When I am on top, I control all the pumping, this is the easiest positon for women . And we do it with his sitting against the wall or on a chair, it helps when we control the pumping, rocking, grinding here. 

Love oral but I have only been able to orgasm from this 2 times that I recall, it is only forplay for us. 

The mental passion of being fused as one heightens my pleasure immesureably , that with a little fantasy & the G-spt getting it's attention, nothing sweeter than orgasmic sex.

We know very little about toys, that is a whole another door to open in our sex life -maybe someday.


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## LoveMeTruly (Dec 13, 2011)

Never come from oral  My 'self pleasure' has over the years become less and less satisfying, tbh. I orgasm best on top like BigBadWolf explains. They can happen with a different level of intensity though, because sexually, I'm very psychological, I like dirty talk, and dominance- if I feel like my husband is insane with need for me, that orgasm is going to be incredible. 

As for dimensionality, my husband is fairly average I believe, but of nice girth (perhaps a little above average there?) and with a nice upward curve. I'm not sure (I've been with him for so long, I've forgotten my past partners  ) how this affects my orgasms, but I enjoy his attributes greatly when performing oral.


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## annagarret (Jun 12, 2011)

Doing it from behind gets me to O from penetration. My rear is usually up higher on pillows, or just with my head in the mattress, giving my DH a great angle to reach my G spot. My DH is on the larger side but I think it is more about position and practice than girth. He is so awesome...he drives insane by doing this...


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## Rough Patch Sewing (Apr 18, 2011)

Just read an article and commented on  15 tips to make your girl c#m, and in addition to the advice that the best sex focuses on give, then get in return... it also gave some great advice on great ways to foreplay stimulate her. However, I do leave a warning: The owner of the website, Betty Dobson displays some of her erotic art on the site. So sensitive eyes be warned!

It also gave a great tip on playing around with applying outside hand pressure below her belly button to try to position her internal G-spot for the best thrust-contact. All for the best orgasm crescendo she can enjoy.

Worth a try!


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