# when is the right time to start dating after seperation



## ontheup (Mar 4, 2012)

Hi
i have been seperated for 20months, my friends keep telling me it's time to dip into the dating pool and get myself a new fella. I just smile sweetly and change the subject.
i would like to know if there is a right time to start dating?, and how do you even go about it, i have never dated, STBX was first and only man for me since age of 18, now 40, so i don't have a clue.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

How long until the divorce? Why are you not divorced already?


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## ontheup (Mar 4, 2012)

i have filed for divorce last month, basically i could have divorced him straight away on grounds of adultery or on the grounds of behaviour(there is a proper word but cannot think of it at moment)
I had to prove without any doubt that he was having a physical affair which until he left he was not was a on/off EA or i had to use his mental state and breakdowns over the years against him which meant dragging up things that would have seriously hurt his relationship with his kids, which i could never do, he did enough damage to it himself with out me kicking the boot in. I just could not bring myself to be a Bxxch despite how he treated me and hurt me, so i waited until all the financial things and the house was legally mine before filing for divorce. So just waiting to hear if i am intitled to recieve legal aid towards cost of divorce. i put the kids first over my hurt and need for revenge, tried to keep things as stable as i could for them.


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