# husband favors his kids over mine (his step kids)



## swimmer70 (Oct 15, 2009)

I have been married for two and a half years.
I have three young children. My husband has two teenagers.
My husband says things like, "Do you have any idea how stupid you look?" to my daughter who is dancing around the living room (she is seven years old). 
He is down right mean and insulting to my sons. Calls them "Nancy" when they cry. 
He also helps care for them too. He helps out with babysitting them after school two days a week when I have to work until 4pm. He jokes around with them, too. 
I have spoken to him about his harshness regarding them. He is a very sensitive father to his own children. I have never heard him criticize their character the way he does with the younger kids.
It also drives me crazy when he talks about my kids in a negative way to his kids. He will mock them and joke, insulting them with his own teenagers. They are all laughing and it makes me feel awful. 
It makes the whole thing feel divided. Like teams against eachother. 
Secretly, it makes me hate him. Sometimes I look at him and I think that I would just like him to disappear. I think, for my kids sake, sometimes that I should just pack them up and leave.
Our marriage has been FILLED with struggle. Ex-spouses, his flirtations with many other women (carrying on an online relationship with another woman...)
The biggest problem is that when I tell him something bothers me that he's doing, I just start to feel like I don't really accept the way he is.
And I wonder why we got married.
We have been to SIX different marriage counselors. The one we are with now we have been working with for a couple of months. And I feel like we are making progress.
The final area is parenting. We haven't gotten there yet fully.
Really, I am starting to just feel like I have to fake it for awhile.
Fake like everything is fine, because we talk until we are blue in the face! And it doesn't help!
I see he is just as frustrated with me as I am with him.
Sometimes I just want to run away.
Advice.


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## dobo (Jun 30, 2009)

I wouldn't allow my kids to be subjected to someone like him. Tape him and play his abuse back to him. Ask him if he sounds like a bully.

Your kids are being damaged by this jerk.


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## PrivateTalk (May 27, 2011)

I agree, I think your kids may learn to see themselves as less. Your husband is being cruel and I don't think that he intends to change that. I would leave if I were you, I know that is probably not what you want to hear but he doesn't sound like a loving husband especially if your just going to discover that he's been cheating on you. Think of your children and the effects mental abuse can cause them over years. Take them from this it only seems to be a damaging environment.

Find someone that can love you the way you deserve and can be truly a caring step parent to your kids


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## mikey11 (May 31, 2011)

lol...this thread is over a year old


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