# What makes a 35+ woman attractive to you?



## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

This is somewhat of a stolen thread topic concept from *southbound*. What makes a 35+ woman attractive to you guys? Also, what would make you have the courage to approach that woman and strike up a conversation if you noticed there was no wedding ring? Physical and personality traits are acceptable answers on this one. There truly are no wrong answers.

However, try to refrain from the whole “She needs to look like Carrie Underwood, Scarlett Johansson, Jessica Biel or Megan Fox,” because they are *SOOOO* not even close to 35 years old. I’m certain you guys would hate to have the ladies play the whole “He needs to look like Matthew McConaughey,” comparison card.

Have at it guys!


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## Therealbrighteyes

You like stirring hornets nests, don't cha Kansas?


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## nader

Looks like Sophia Vergara from Modern Family! j/k (sort of - I do like latin women and was lucky enough to marry one!).

well dressed, big laugh, sense of humor, cute smile, great hair, positive/fun attitude, good poise/posture, confidence, well educated, good taste in beer...and good old fashioned T&A doesn't hurt either!

There was a girl in college I had this crazy crush on, and she dipped. Normally this wouldn't be attractive, but because of all the above traits it made her that much sexier!


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## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

Therealbrighteyes said:


> You like stirring hornets nests, don't cha Kansas?


Not the hornets, just like to play with bees.


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## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

nader said:


> There was a girl in college I had this crazy crush on, and she dipped. Normally this wouldn't be attractive, but because of all the above traits it made her that much sexier!


Who would've thought? Hmmmm??


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## Therealbrighteyes

TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore said:


> Not the hornets, just like to play with bees.


Fair warning that a guy named Scannerguard is going to be all over this.


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## Halien

Therealbrighteyes said:


> You like stirring hornets nests, don't cha Kansas?


C'mon now. They don't even start looking really attractive until 35.


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## Therealbrighteyes

Halien said:


> C'mon now. They don't even start looking really attractive until 35.


Well it's official, I love you Halien. Out with the old guard, in with the new. Under his regime, any woman over 26 was past her shelf life. Any woman over 40 just needs to pick out her coffin already and join a convent.


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## Runs like Dog

Curves, big beautiful smile, a great laugh, good taste in clothing and jewelery
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Duke

There are a LOT of beautiful women between 35-45 YO. The first thing that catches my eye is a great smile! Besides that a fun attitude, confidence, and doesn't have to have a perfect body but a woman that takes care of herself. An elegant look is more attractive than super casual I'd say. Heels not flip flops.

I'm 45 FWIW.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Runs like Dog

Having finally got over herself. That is a turn on.


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## thinner

A daughter that's 25...(pause for laughter). Just kidding. Athletic, intelligent, confidence, beauty and poise. A big bank account doesn't hurt, but not necessary.  Oh, and a great sense of humor.


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## Enginerd

It's different for everyone and can change over the years. By the time you're 35 you realize that some traits are not so great over the long haul but may be good for other reasons . I'm from SoCal, 46 and spent a little time around hippies and bikers when growing up which has affected my taste in women. Before I was married I would approach women with the following traits:

Physical:
Natural looking with modest make-up.
Longish hair
Warm smile
Healthy alabaster skin. (my fixation)
Feminine with girlie curves but no rolls. 
Good hygiene. 
Smells nice but not overpowering. 


Other Basics:
Good attitude with a sense of humor about life.
Not a princess with healthy levels of humility

In the end I think it comes down to a certain comfort level for each person. Everyones background is different so the best bet is to be yourself and attract the guy who is comfortable with who you are. However if you are not "approachable" then you could be waiting for a long time.


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## PBear

Things I find incredibly attractive about my 42 year old GF...

Intelligent. She has a degree, is well informed about many different topics
Self sufficient. Runs a business with a partner
Kind and caring. She's willing to give of herself, teaching adult education and literacy as a volunteer
Sensual. Loves to touch and be touched. Loves to be teased for hours or sometimes even days
Beautiful. My first thought when someone asked me to describe her was a 42 year old model. Blonde, blue eyes, just stunning!
Sexy. Even though she thinks she might have a few extra pounds, she still wants to wear lingerie or a bikini because she knows I like seeing her in them
Classy. Even on her worst days, she never looks like an escapee from Walmart. She doesn't over-dress, but she does like to look her best.
Sexual. She has fantasies and an imagination that blows my mind. And I haven't even thought of entertaining myself for months. I don't have the energy for it!

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Therealbrighteyes

So I have a question......do you prefer 35+ rather than younger women? All the guys here are saying very positive things but if they were the norm, you wouldn't have a bunch of guys chasing younger women.


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## PBear

Therealbrighteyes said:


> So I have a question......do you prefer 35+ rather than younger women? All the guys here are saying very positive things but if they were the norm, you wouldn't have a bunch of guys chasing younger women.


Since I'm here already... I would think somewhere between my age and 7 years younger (36). 

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Entropy3000

Runs like Dog said:


> Having finally got over herself. That is a turn on.


I was looking for the words to explain it.

This. All those other attributes but she should have matured enough to be ... real.


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## drdrfor

I don't get the part about no wedding ring. the ring doesn't make it a "np deal". I get attracted to women who think they are attractive and who willingly display their sexuality. A "com hither look" will catch my eye far quicker than any other attribute.
Oh, and long legs and/or pert nipples will seal the deal. LOL


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## Enginerd

Therealbrighteyes said:


> So I have a question......do you prefer 35+ rather than younger women? All the guys here are saying very positive things but if they were the norm, you wouldn't have a bunch of guys chasing younger women.


Are we talking about getting laid or a LTR? All dirty old men like me fantasize about younger women. It's natural for men to seek women who are still capable of breeding. It's hardwired in us to ensure our species survives. Harsh but true. However, I prefer to be with someone at the same stage in life. I believe a truely deep emotional connection can not exist between a 25 year old "girl" and 45+ year old man.


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## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

drdrfor said:


> I don't get the part about no wedding ring. the ring doesn't make it a "np deal".


Alright, it’s definitely more of a conservative train of thought that if a woman had a wedding ring on, most decent guys would admire from afar but not try to hit on her.


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## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

PBear said:


> Even on her worst days, she never looks like an escapee from Walmart. _Posted via Mobile Device_


I that is a great prerequisite!!!:smthumbup:


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## ManDup

Nobody wears dresses anymore. That's hot. Also, smile. Being logical is a huge turn-on for me. If you have any interest at all in geeky things, you have a specific demographic who will beat a path to your door.


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## Therealbrighteyes

ManDup said:


> Nobody wears dresses anymore. That's hot. Also, smile. Being logical is a huge turn-on for me. If you have any interest at all in geeky things, you have a specific demographic who will beat a path to your door.


What constitutes geeky? Are we talking liking Monty Python or are we talking about a chic who thinks Linux is the best operating system in the world?


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## Therealbrighteyes

Enginerd said:


> Are we talking about getting laid or a LTR? All dirty old men like me fantasize about younger women. It's natural for men to seek women who are still capable of breeding. It's hardwired in us to ensure our species survives. Harsh but true. However, I prefer to be with someone at the same stage in life. I believe a truely deep emotional connection can not exist between a 25 year old "girl" and 45+ year old man.


A woman who is 35+ is capable of breeding so that argument is kinda out the window. If you say you like younger women because they often times have better bodies, now that I understand.


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## alphaomega

TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore said:


> This is somewhat of a stolen thread topic concept from *southbound*. What makes a 35+ woman attractive to you guys? Also, what would make you have the courage to approach that woman and strike up a conversation if you noticed there was no wedding ring? Physical and personality traits are acceptable answers on this one. There truly are no wrong answers.
> 
> However, try to refrain from the whole “She needs to look like Carrie Underwood, Scarlett Johansson, Jessica Biel or Megan Fox,” because they are *SOOOO* not even close to 35 years old. I’m certain you guys would hate to have the ladies play the whole “He needs to look like Matthew McConaughey,” comparison card.
> 
> Have at it guys!


But......I DO look like Matthew McConaughey.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Runs like Dog

Pretty girls are pretty girls. I want a full on ferocious woman.


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## alphaomega

When a woman still looks hot with messed up hair after waking up....that's hot!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## drdrfor

TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore said:


> Alright, it’s definitely more of a conservative train of thought that if a woman had a wedding ring on, most decent guys would admire from afar but not try to hit on her.


OK, I'm not a "decent guy". Now that we've established that, Are you busy this weekend? 

Women who aren't shopping, aren't even looking at the goods. If a woman flirts with me, she's open for suggestions, regardless of whether she's wearing a ring or not. Once we've put that issue aside, I look for a woman who feels and acts attractive. I'm not interested in most under 30 women because they haven't learned to appreciate themselves as "objects of desire" other than to a level of "tits and ass". 

I find women attractive who think and act sensually, Women who regard themselves as desirable, women who think of theselves as more than mere receptors of men's lust. 

A women whose patina of fire lies just below the surface, simply waiting for a man who recognizes her inner flame, is a woman who draws my gaze. A fire unlit is far more engaging than a flame ready to be snuffed.


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## OhGeesh

This is just like that what makes a 40yr old guy hot.......there isn't anything magic here either.

The same things that make a 20yr old HOT you just realize there is a little age package.


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## OhGeesh

Enginerd said:


> Are we talking about getting laid or a LTR? All dirty old men like me fantasize about younger women. It's natural for men to seek women who are still capable of breeding. It's hardwired in us to ensure our species survives. Harsh but true. However, I prefer to be with someone at the same stage in life. I believe a truely deep emotional connection can not exist between a 25 year old "girl" and 45+ year old man.


It's natural to fantasize about woman who are capable of breeding? Is that the way you justify it or something?

I could care less if you can have kids or never have kids if you are hot you are hot!! 20,25,30,35,40 IDC!!!

Halle Berry is freaking hot what is she 42? 

Capable of breeding haaa that's some true psychobabble right there!!


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## Halien

Therealbrighteyes said:


> So I have a question......do you prefer 35+ rather than younger women? All the guys here are saying very positive things but if they were the norm, you wouldn't have a bunch of guys chasing younger women.


In choosing to meet a man's gaze in the appraising way, an older woman brings a refined set of criteria to the equation. She knows what she wants and chooses to look at you. That's appealing. 

In my twenties, I was fortunate to go to a party college. Many one night stands. For some reason, though, I had some relationships with older, sometimes married women. I'm a different person now, but I developed some personal bias back then. I had crushed my ankle in a brawl. Grew up with parents in a biker group. Even on the best days, I walk with a limp. Back then, I sometimes needed a cane. So, you have Joe Sixpack who is big into fitness. Having a John Wayne limp (as my friends called it) teaches you alot. The younger women didn't actually see me. Once they notice the limp, the lights go out for the most part. Okay for a one night stand, but not much more. The more mature women see me.


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## Therealbrighteyes

Halien said:


> In choosing to meet a man's gaze in the appraising way, an older woman brings a refined set of criteria to the equation. She knows what she wants and chooses to look at you. That's appealing.
> 
> In my twenties, I was fortunate to go to a party college. Many one night stands. For some reason, though, I had some relationships with older, sometimes married women. I'm a different person now, but I developed some personal bias back then. I had crushed my ankle in a brawl. Grew up with parents in a biker group. Even on the best days, I walk with a limp. Back then, I sometimes needed a cane. So, you have Joe Sixpack who is big into fitness. Having a John Wayne limp (as my friends called it) teaches you alot. The younger women didn't actually see me. Once they notice the limp, the lights go out for the most part. Okay for a one night stand, but not much more. The more mature women see me.


Halien,
You are a breath of fresh air and yes, I saw your post about your limp. So what! You have a limp. I bet we all have something that makes us different or as I like to see it, unique. Anybody who cannot see that isn't worth the time of day.


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## lost all respect

The thing that scares my wife the most is that it isn't the young women I find attractive, because she knows most of them look right past an older guy. 

I am 44 and tend to find women in the 35-50 year old range that are well put together.....clothes, makeup, jewelry, a confident smile the most attractive. Someone said something about curves.....I think that is something that men appreciate more with age....or at least I do. Women like I've mentioned making eye contact and acknowledging our eye contact can tend to distract me.....and I'm not one to oogle women in public.


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## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

drdrfor said:


> A women whose patina of fire lies just below the surface, simply waiting for a man who recognizes her inner flame, is a woman who draws my gaze. A fire unlit is far more engaging than a flame ready to be snuffed.


drdrfor you scare me! LOL!!! Did someone find their mom’s old stash of Harlequin Romance novels. LOL!!!! I’m only teasing because between my mom and two of her sisters, they could have opened up and stocked an entire secondhand book store with all of theirs. They had read so many that each of them would initial the inside covers to ensure no time would be wasted rereading the same novel. I once asked them, "How can you tell the difference from one novel to the next?"


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## Enginerd

Not a justification or psychobabble. Read a book or at least watch some educational TV. We are just intelligent animals and there are underlying reasons for all our sexual behaviors. I agree that Halle Berry is hot but she doesn't exactly look like your typical 42 year old does she? She's a genetic wonder with unbelievable skin.


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## Scannerguard

_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Scannerguard

I certainly find older women attractive. That doesn't mean I'd marry one. Jeez. . . Don't you all know it is the goal of marriage is to be productive as per the Catholic Church? You guys at Tam have a very romantic notion of marriage.


_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

Scannerguard said:


> I certainly find older women attractive. That doesn't mean I'd marry one. Jeez. . . Don't you all know it is the goal of marriage is to be productive as per the Catholic Church? You guys at Tam have a very romantic notion of marriage.
> 
> 
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Yep. I had the big, huge Catholic Ceremony that my father absolutely reveled in. On the other hand, my ex-husband chose to no longer follow those same marriage guidelines we (as Catholics) were brought up to hold so true to our beliefs. That about sums up my inability to receive weekly communion at mass. Heartbreaking because I was also confirmed before I had even reached my twenties.


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## Scannerguard

I am being tongue and cheek of course but there is an underlying message behind my humor. I usually reply here thru the filter of marriage ( mating for life ). I have never said anything about a shelf life; I have only spoken about optimal male-female pairing. 

The truth is many of the women who get their panties in a wad at my assessments would be the strongest to overreact if their 26 up son brought home a 42 up female to meet you and said "gee whiz isn't she wonderful?"

As far as what makes a35 to female attractive. . .how come no man said boobs? A face will eventually become wrinkled... Boobs are forever. 

(you can spare the references towards me ladies . )
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Therealbrighteyes

Scannerguard said:


> I am being tongue and cheek of course but there is an underlying message behind my humor. I usually reply here thru the filter of marriage ( mating for life ). I have never said anything about a shelf life; I have only spoken about optimal male-female pairing.
> 
> The truth is many of the women who get their panties in a wad at my assessments would be the strongest to overreact if their 26 up son brought home a 42 up female to meet you and said "gee whiz isn't she wonderful?"
> 
> As far as what makes a35 to female attractive. . .how come no man said boobs? A face will eventually become wrinkled... Boobs are forever.
> 
> (you can spare the references towards me ladies . )
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I just KNEW you would be here. You did say that a woman over 40 is limited. Boobs aren't forever either. Ever see gravity? Sure, they are still there but after a while, they look like tube socks. Not saying mine do btw.  
Okay, so a man needs a younger woman, got it. So you are saying that a 40 something year old man needs a 26 year old for what? Having kids? I don't know of any 40 something year old man who wants to have more kids. Let's just call it like it is. An old man who likes young and strange. 

Welcome back Dr. Clean. We've missed you.


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## OhGeesh

Enginerd said:


> Not a justification or psychobabble. Read a book or at least watch some educational TV. We are just intelligent animals and there are underlying reasons for all our sexual behaviors. I agree that Halle Berry is hot but she doesn't exactly look like your typical 42 year old does she? She's a genetic wonder with unbelievable skin.


What does looks have to do with child bearing years? Absolutely nothing!! That is what makes your post psychobabble!!

Give me 100 18-22yr old 200lb woman or 1 40yr old with a hysterectomy and I know what I'm picking!!

Humans have free will jack the next thing you'll start spewing off about pheromones......or something.


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## Therealbrighteyes

OhGeesh said:


> What does looks have to do with child bearing years? Absolutely nothing!! That is what makes your post psychobabble!!
> 
> Give me 100 18-22yr old 200lb woman or 1 40yr old with a hysterectomy and I know what I'm picking!!
> 
> Humans have free will jack the next thing you'll start spewing off about pheromones......or something.


Okay, but let's say those 18-22 year olds are 125lbs. Who would you go for?


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## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

Scannerguard said:


> . .how come no man said boobs? A face will eventually become wrinkled... Boobs are forever. _Posted via Mobile Device_



Ya, but boobs don't look the same forever either. Ever seen that movie “The Sweetest Thing”? Some days I feel like I can totally relate to a specific scene which has Cameron Diaz in it. However for me it’s more like “29...39...29...39...29...” LOL!!!!


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## michzz

If she's 35 she'd have to not run away wierded out by this 53-year-old man! 

Pretty face, well groomed, interested, flirty, aware of the world, can hold a conversation, up for road trips, can drink a glass a wine and not be REALLY picky about food.

Not stuck up. Smile that lights up my heart.

And that's true for whatever age. Mainly within 10 years of mine.


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## Therealbrighteyes

michzz said:


> If she's 35 she'd have to not run away wierded out by this 53-year-old man!
> 
> Pretty face, well groomed, interested, flirty, aware of the world, can hold a conversation, up for road trips, can drink a glass a wine and not be REALLY picky about food.
> 
> Not stuck up. Smile that lights up my heart.
> 
> And that's true for whatever age. Mainly within 10 years of mine.


There's a reason I adore you and why you will be a HOT commodity in the dating world. You sir are the real deal, a gentleman. :yawn2:


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## unbelievable

Confidence and class. a woman who feels good about herself and is comfortable with her age is just plain beautiful, no matter what age she is. Maybe I'm just strange, but I think most women are beautiful in one way or another. I don't flirt with them and I don't hit on them cause I'm married, but I do admire and respect them. I think God's finest work was the female human. There's nothing better looking, better smelling, or more interesting on earth.


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## Therealbrighteyes

unbelievable said:


> Confidence and class. a woman who feels good about herself and is comfortable with her age is just plain beautiful, no matter what age she is. Maybe I'm just strange, but I think most women are beautiful in one way or another. I don't flirt with them and I don't hit on them cause I'm married, but I do admire and respect them. I think God's finest work was the female human. There's nothing better looking, better smelling, or more interesting on earth.


I do love how confidence and class is what is being trotted out for us "older" women. The younger ones just have to flash their t!ts to get noticed by old men but we have to be confident and classy. Comfortable with her age? Yeah, we aren't 100. Come on.


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## WhiteRabbit

unbelievable said:


> Confidence and class. a woman who feels good about herself and is comfortable with her age is just plain beautiful, no matter what age she is. Maybe I'm just strange, but I think most women are beautiful in one way or another. I don't flirt with them and I don't hit on them cause I'm married, but I do admire and respect them. I think God's finest work was the female human. There's nothing better looking, better smelling, or more interesting on earth.


Oh this just made me swoon...finally someone who gets that a woman cannot be contained by something as simple as a number for her age.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## greenpearl

I asked my husband this question! 

He said a lot of things which other posters said. 

But then he added: A woman who has an organized life is very attractive. Her body is not quite like a 25 year-old, but still in a good shape, don't think like a 25 year-old and live like a 25 year-old! 

A 35 year-old should be organized and mature!


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## Kobo

TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore said:


> This is somewhat of a stolen thread topic concept from *southbound*. What makes a 35+ woman attractive to you guys? Also, what would make you have the courage to approach that woman and strike up a conversation if you noticed there was no wedding ring? Physical and personality traits are acceptable answers on this one. There truly are no wrong answers.
> 
> However, try to refrain from the whole “She needs to look like Carrie Underwood, Scarlett Johansson, Jessica Biel or Megan Fox,” because they are *SOOOO* not even close to 35 years old. I’m certain you guys would hate to have the ladies play the whole “He needs to look like Matthew McConaughey,” comparison card.
> 
> Have at it guys!



I dated women 30+ since I left home at 18. My greatest seperation was a 47 year old at 19. What distinguished older women from younger ones was that older women played a lot less games and had more of an idea of what they wanted. You can really tell when you date both at the same time period. Physically, the same things that attract me to a young woman would attract me to a older woman.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## unbelievable

If a young thing want's to show lots of skin, guys are going to look but very few of us would want a wife or daughter looking like that. It's like guys seeing the Batmobile...yeah, I'll look at it, but I aint buying one, doesn't suit my purposes, and I'd feel stupid with one.


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## chillymorn

A plesent attitude,smiles alot,keeps fit as best as she can,sexually uninhibited, fun to be with,not negative.

I don't mind a few extra pounds as long as she isn't sloppy 

a woman who trusts a man judgment and dosen't try to change me.


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## rider03

Friendly. Somewhat reserved. Flirty (in a classy way). I adore making eye contact with a woman 35+ in the grocery store or somewhere and we both smile and say hi as we pass. More than that, if I get a whiff of her perfume it just melts me. I really don't care if she's "good looking" or whatever. In fact, I tend to be drawn towards the underdog so to speak. The one who doesn't know how cute she is and therefore, doesn't have an attitude. Oh, and touch. Lightly puts her hand on my shoulder while we share a laugh about something. Love that. I feel like Al Pacino in Scent of a Woman. I just love, love, love women.

This is all first impression of course. Which I think was the op's question. All the other traits everyone listed will be discovered later.


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## unbelievable

A sweet disposition??? I didn't realize you could even get that option anymore. I'll stick that at the top of my list.


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## thinner

unbelievable said:


> If a young thing want's to show lots of skin, guys are going to look but very few of us would want a wife or daughter looking like that. *It's like guys seeing the Batmobile...yeah, I'll look at it, but I aint buying one, doesn't suit my purposes, and I'd feel stupid with one.*


Now, if I had the matching outfit, I wouldn't feel stupid. :smthumbup:


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## Halien

Through a fluke, I once found myself as the single holdout on a list of designated approvers to pay a two million dollar payment to a supplier. I'll admit, I was the low man on the list. Awkward. The supplier wasn't getting the quality part right, and new federal engine emissions were just around the corner. It was make or break time. The supplier's parent company sent four VPs in their private jet to take me to the site installation to prove that they could meet the final date for the last payment. I only mention this because it became very obvious that they did their homework on me. It was really creepy. They only talked about their kids and how important their families were, but it was pretty obvious that they didn't have a clue. The one sitting closest to me offered to show his family pictures in his wallet. He was about 48, but the trophy wife was 25. When he showed his kids, they were with his first wife. Simply put, her real beauty was stunning. Every picture showed a beaming smile, and poise, even though she was wearing a baloon hat in one. The guy was an idiot. Got the impression that the current wife was happy as long as the checkbook stayed open.

I'll admit I'm like most other guys. When an attractive woman passes by, if the high heels make the rear end take a life of its own, its hard not to notice. But that symmetry of motion doesn't have an end date for a number of years. Then again, I'm married, so its not like I ever notice. Just thinking conceptually.


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## Runs like Dog

A cougar in the kitchen and a chef in the bedroom.


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## Helicon

The key to success for a woman 35+ is to keep a young mind. No one can stop the effects of looking older, but it's that inner glow of youthfulness that's important. That's what will shine through. 

Continue doing all the things that drew men to you in your early twenties. Stay in shape, dress sexy, be cute, outgoing, fun, adventurous and spontaneous. This is especially important if you're bringing kids into the picture.


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## AbsolutelyFree

I haven't read any of the other responses yet. I am interested to see how similar they are.

A lot of people believe that women can no longer be physically attractive once they past a certain age - 30, 35, 40, whatever. The belief seems to be that the only way she can remain physically attractive is by having excessive plastic surgery, and even then, she will never look as nice as a woman in her 20s.

Actually, this isn't true at all. I have seen women in their 50s who I considered to be *hot*. The oldest one (that I knew the age of) was 53, and she was quite a babe. It's true, her face was not as smooth and youthful as it might have once been, but besides all of that, she had it all going on.


The basic things which are physically attractuve are not much different than for younger women:

- Don't cut your hair like a man
- Have big boobs and a nice butt
- Have a flat stomach
- Nice, toned legs are good too

There are also a few things which a lot of women do which I feel are unnecessary:

- Tanning
- Dying hair blonde - Dark hair is a lot more attractive!

As as the non physical traits...Well, those are the same as for younger women, too. 

- A kind spirited and graceful personality. By kind spirited, I mean she can challenge you or disagree with you without being insulting or sarcastic. She makes you feel respected and wanted throughout daily life. By graceful, I mean that she isn't a wild party girl who gets drunk a lot and dances on the bar, doesn't throw things, yell or scream, etc.

- Sex! It is a wierd thing with men, but it's true. Having sex with a woman makes me feel attracted to her. I feel strongly in love with her during and after sex, and this feeling resonates through the next day, week, whatever. Yes, people have sex _because_ they are attracted to eachother, but it also _creates_ attraction.


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## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

unbelievable said:


> It's like guys seeing the Batmobile...yeah, I'll look at it, but I aint buying one, doesn't suit my purposes, and I'd feel stupid with one.





thinner said:


> Now, if I had the matching outfit, I wouldn't feel stupid. :smthumbup:


:smthumbup: Just so long as he shares and I get to drive it twice a month. LOL!!


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## bill2011

For me, nice smile, long hair, have some meat on the bones, should only need a little makeup to highlight the face. And most importantly must be sensual, caring and have a sense of humor.


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## nice777guy

Haven't read the comments above.

Recently went to a concert - kind of "Pop-country" if you will - with my wife and my in-laws. Surrounded by a lot of younger girls.

But there were two women - over 35 who caught my attention more than the younger girls.

One woman was just very social and outgoing. Her personality was kind of "bubbly." She seemed to be talking to everyone around her. She and her husband were both drinking beer - holding hands - and were both dancing together when the concert started. Yes - she was very "pretty" and a good dancer - but a lot of it was personality.

Then there were two women with their older daughters (kids were maybe 13 or so) sitting right in front of us. One of the daughters kept taking pictures of her mom. Her Mom was probably a few years older than 35 - and was again very "pretty." But I was just AMAZED at seeing a 13 year old daughter who genuinely seemed to be having a good time with her mother at a concert. Hard to explain - but my wife that night was dressed in a sparkly sliver shirt - showing cleavage - kept taking her own picture. To me - it felt like I was out with a 25 year old - and I don't mean that in a good way. And although the woman in front of us was dressed modestly, I couldn't help but "notice" her - almost like looking at her through her own daughter's eyes. I KNOW how my 11 year old would have reacted to my wife's "LOOK AT ME" behavior and appearance.

Not sure if this has made much sense. But - to try and sum up - the attaction was only partially physical. And secondly - a lot of it was me being attracted to something I think I'm missing. One woman - drawing attention to herself by just being bubbly. The other - looking like Mom of the Year. Contrasted by my wife - a 39 year old trying to look 10 years younger - taking her OWN picture to put on Facebook to SHOW everyone how much fun she's having.


----------



## 2xloser

The first thing I always notice abou a woman, any woman, is her hair. And I am partial to longer, thick hair worn down.

Femininity oozes in everything she does. 

Smiles easily, and for real - no falseness. With good teeth.

Poise and self-pride/confidence, in how she walks, talks, and acts even when no one's looking.

Eye contact when talking, when listening, and when there's silence.

Not sloppy - in dress, in relative physical fitness.

Can talk with her eyes... especially to a man, to tell you to 'go away', or 'come hither'.

All the body parts just 'work' together.

Sure boobs matter, but they need to fit the body they're on. An appropriate bra if there's 'sag'... or even if there's not. You want ot see 'firmness'. Height/weight proprtionate; doesn't need to be a workout maven. A flat stomach does amazing things to a woman's entire body...

Confident enough to 'show off what she's got', without flaunting any of it.

Can wear a bathing suit in public without embarassment.

Looks great even with wet hair and no makeup.

Unafraid and uninhibited sexually, without being trashy.

Some cleavage & good shoes help. I hate 'flats'; love heels, boots.


Oh - and doesn't cheat on her man... and makes no ones about it...... I started that comment tongue-in-cheek, but there IS something very attractive that can ooze from a woman that lets it be known she is WITH her man and quietly, confidently adores him.


----------



## magnoliagal

nice777guy said:


> Contrasted by my wife - a 39 year old trying to look 10 years younger - taking her OWN picture to put on Facebook to SHOW everyone how much fun she's having.


Sadly I know exactly the type of woman you are talking about.


----------



## nice777guy

magnoliagal said:


> Sadly I know exactly the type of woman you are talking about.


I really was just totally blown away that a 13 year old girl would be taking so many pics of her mom!!!


----------



## magnoliagal

nice777guy said:


> I really was just totally blown away that a 13 year old girl would be taking so many pics of her mom!!!


She adores her mom thats why. The woman I know cares more about herself than her kids. Oh she goes through the motions of being a great mom but it's fake. We all went skating one day with our kids. Most of the moms were up skating too but not this woman. She spent the whole time on her blackberry. She got up once and skated just to pose for pictures to put on FB. Not of her kids mostly her. 

Whats sad is she's a beautiful woman but her snobbiness makes her ugly.


----------



## AFEH

Financial independence. Leads a healthy and active lifestyle, maybe runs, plays tennis, golf. Into healthy food, grows her own fruit and veg, maybe has some chickens!!! Good cook, well looked after body, well within her BMI. Adventurous and likes the outdoor life. Not afraid of confrontation and telling like it is in a mature way. Into DIY and house renovation.


----------



## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

Teeter-tottering between feelings of confidence and gloom after reading a lot of great posts on this thread. The confidence part is how I have been repeatedly told I possess so many of these traits. Not just by males either. (And not by females in a weird way. Well, at least I'm hoping not) . The gloomy part is, I have so dated the wrong men who do not recognize these traits. Or ...... if they do realize it, they get scared and leg bail. UGH!!!


----------



## TruthSetsYouFree

The thing is - the hard boiled truth of it - is that we ALL get older. We ALL get wrinkles, gray hair, and body parts that start to sag that were once up and at attention. It's simply a fact of life. Men age just the same as women age. Age is nondiscriminatory. It doesn't care if you're male, female; handsome, beautiful, ugly; white, black, purple; rich or poor. Young men and women who feel their youth and beauty is their power will shortly learn that those years are short and are over in the blink of an eye. If a person does not take the time to cultivate other attractive qualities, they're going to be left with a pretty empty bag down the road. I personally find people - men and women - of all ages attractive. A lot of one's beauty comes from within. Confidence also helps a lot.


----------



## 2xloser

Have to add something here -- there's a difference in what "catches your eye & initially attracts you" vs. once you start getting to know someone and be around them.


----------



## Wrench

Clean teeth, good laugh, minimal cleaveage, smart-ass personality. Healty eater is bonus points


----------



## Jellybeans

PBear said:


> Classy. Even on her worst days, she never looks like an escapee from Walmart.


:rofl:

You've been looking at The People of Walmart, haven't you?



Scannerguard said:


> . . .how come no man said boobs? A face will eventually become wrinkled... Boobs are forever.


:lol:

Someone mentioned on here (can't find the post)t ahta curves are something a man appreciates as he gets older. Why do you men think that is?


----------



## nice777guy

Jellybeans said:


> :rofl:
> 
> You've been looking at The People of Walmart, haven't you?
> 
> 
> 
> :lol:
> 
> Someone mentioned on here (can't find the post)t ahta curves are something a man appreciates as he gets older. Why do you men think that is?


Survival of the fittest. Curves usually mean "birthing hips" - and I mean that in a good way. Some would say that we are attracted to birthing hips so that our species will survive.


----------



## Therealbrighteyes

nice777guy said:


> Survival of the fittest. Curves usually mean "birthing hips" - and I mean that in a good way. Some would say that we are attracted to birthing hips so that our species will survive.


Jesus, this entire thread is starting to sound like a horse auction. Nice hips, teeth and hair. Neeeehhhhh.


----------



## Jellybeans

LOL @ "horse auction"

Gotta say, I am big on teeth myself. I love nice teeth.


----------



## nice777guy

OK - so for me so far - personality - birthing hips - and the ability to suck a golf ball through a straw!!!

Should about do it!!!


----------



## nice777guy

Would actually prefer no teeth to big teeth - while I'm being overly honest here...


----------



## Therealbrighteyes

nice777guy said:


> OK - so for me so far - personality - birthing hips - and the ability to suck a golf ball through a straw!!!
> 
> Should about do it!!!


And a nice set of personalities, eh NG?


----------



## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

nice777guy said:


> and the ability to suck a golf ball through a straw!!!


:lol: Well shoot …… I thought it was through a garden hose. Back to the drawing board I guess. LOL!!!


----------



## Therealbrighteyes

TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore said:


> :lol: Well shoot …… I thought it was through a garden hose. Back to the drawing board I guess. LOL!!!


Try doing it through a Pixie Stick.


----------



## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

Therealbrighteyes said:


> Try doing it through a Pixie Stick.


:rofl::rofl::rofl:


----------



## nice777guy

You know - if you can do it through a pixie stick - no personality or birthing hips needed!!! Just some proof that you aren't a man!


----------



## Runs like Dog

Being able to shoot a ping pong ball out of her cooter and across the room?


----------



## nice777guy

Runs like Dog said:


> Being able to shoot a ping pong ball out of her cooter and across the room?


Thanks! Just shot COKE out of my NOSE!!!


----------



## Scannerguard

> just KNEW you would be here. You did say that a woman over 40 is limited. Boobs aren't forever either. Ever see gravity? Sure, they are still there but after a while, they look like tube socks. Not saying mine do btw.
> Okay, so a man needs a younger woman, got it. So you are saying that a 40 something year old man needs a 26 year old for what? Having kids? I don't know of any 40 something year old man who wants to have more kids. Let's just call it like it is. An old man who likes young and strange.


I only posted here because I was goaded into it off-list. APparently, I have a reputation for being superficial. Or honest. Or both.

No, a man in his 40's is done having kids but the primal urge is there and that's what mate selection is based upon.

As far as gravity, that's why you want big, floppy boobs. . .they can keep on flopping into a woman's late 50's and 60's. After a long day, your wife can put them in your face as she sits on your lap. All your troubles melt away. . .

C'mon. . .this isn't that hard, people. Conversation, flirty way about her, intelligent. . .what is this here? I leave for a few months and the Men's 
Clubhouse turns into a Metrosexual Coffeehouse.

I'm going to have to ask the Elder Sergeant-at-Arms to escort the Ladies out here.


----------



## Therealbrighteyes

nice777guy said:


> Thanks! Just shot COKE out of my NOSE!!!


Better than out your cooter.


----------



## Jellybeans

Runs like Dog said:


> Being able to shoot a ping pong ball out of her cooter and across the room?


:rofl:

I was watching Bradley Cooper last week or so and he was on Letterman telling a story just like this!


----------



## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

Runs like Dog said:


> Being able to shoot a ping pong ball out of her cooter and across the room?


:lol::rofl::rofl::rofl::lol:

OMG!!!!! I can't stop laughing so I can type.


----------



## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

Scannerguard said:


> As far as gravity, that's why you want big, floppy boobs. . .they can keep on flopping into a woman's late 50's and 60's. After a long day, your wife can put them in your face as she sits on your lap. All your troubles melt away. . .


:rofl::rofl: 

All of these likes and dislikes are giving me some pretty hilarious visuals. LOL!!!!! I can’t stop laughing.


----------



## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

nice777guy said:


> Thanks! Just shot COKE out of my NOSE!!!





Therealbrighteyes said:


> Better than out your cooter.



That was a witty comeback there Therealbrighteyes. LOL!!!


----------



## Halien

Scannerguard said:


> As far as gravity, that's why you want big, floppy boobs. . .they can keep on flopping into a woman's late 50's and 60's. After a long day, your wife can put them in your face as she sits on your lap. All your troubles melt away. . .


That is until she starts the movin'. Then you get a black eye.


----------



## nice777guy

Halien said:


> That is until she starts the movin'. Then you get a black eye.


Are we still talking about the ping-pong ball???

Glad the perverts came out to play today!!!


----------



## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

Now that is a visual. :rofl::rofl::rofl: A black eye from the ping-pong ball! :rofl::rofl::rofl:


----------



## Halien

nice777guy said:


> Are we still talking about the ping-pong ball???
> 
> Glad the perverts came out to play today!!!


No, I just had the visual image of those unconstrained big floppy boobs shuckin' around a guys face.


----------



## Therealbrighteyes

TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore said:


> Now that is a visual. :rofl::rofl::rofl: A black eye from the ping-pong ball! :rofl::rofl::rofl:


Imagine what she could do with a pool cue.


----------



## nice777guy

Therealbrighteyes said:


> Imagine what she could do with a pool cue.


I thought I may have crossed the line. You - sir (or ma'am, as I do not know who you may be) - crossed it - jumped back - crossed it again - spat on it - danced on it - and then erased it altogether...

Good job!!!


----------



## OhhShiney

Self confident, makes an effort to take care of herself, dresses well, but not like a teen, light makeup (no "BONDO" for wrinkles, please), smiles a lot, doesn't take herself too seriously, honest, direct, sensitive, riveting eyes, and comfortable with her age, body, and sexuality. 

Oh yeah, wrinkles around eyes and mouth from too much smiling and laughter are hot.


----------



## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

nice777guy said:


> I thought I may have crossed the line. You crossed it - jumped back - crossed it again - spat on it - danced on it - and then erased it altogether...
> Good job!!!



:smthumbup: Oooo!!! I need to remember that one.


----------



## PBear

JB, I've been known to give myself nightmares from wandering through there. The people of Walmart, that is...

I'm very happy to see many of the other attributes of my GF in here! Of course, she's accused me of having googles on for her... Like beer-goggles, but just for her. I could easily start another list. . Sometimes, I think I'm heading into deep water.

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## unbelievable

With a simple flick of a light switch, a "5" looks identical to a "10", but a selfish, obnoxious attitude is just as ugly in the dark as it is in the light of day.


----------



## Duke

TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore said:


> ...However, try to refrain from the whole “She needs to look like Carrie Underwood, Scarlett Johansson, Jessica Biel or Megan Fox,” because they are *SOOOO* not even close to 35 years old...


Maria Bartiromo is almost my age and looks perfect. Just perfect.


----------



## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

Duke said:


> Maria Bartiromo is almost my age and looks perfect. Just perfect.


Ok, I guess Maria Bartiromo can be counted on the normal everyday person list. Especially since I recall once seeing a photo of her wearing a dress which was strapless and she didn’t try to hide the obvious tan lines left from a previous top with body makeup. The only condition to adding her to that list is, we all want her autograph when the two of you hook up.


----------



## bunnybear

Therealbrighteyes said:


> I just KNEW you would be here. You did say that a woman over 40 is limited. Boobs aren't forever either. Ever see gravity? Sure, they are still there but after a while, they look like tube socks. Not saying mine do btw.
> Okay, so a man needs a younger woman, got it. So you are saying that a 40 something year old man needs a 26 year old for what? Having kids? I don't know of any 40 something year old man who wants to have more kids. Let's just call it like it is. An old man who likes young and strange.
> 
> Welcome back Dr. Clean. We've missed you.


Um I'm in my 20's and hubby's turning 42 and I just had our 2nd baby 4 mo.'s ago and planning to have more in the future but I don't think he's using me to give him some healthy babies


----------



## Duke

TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore said:


> ...The only condition to adding her to that list is, we all want her autograph when the two of you hook up.


Ha ha I'll keep that in mind!


----------



## Scannerguard

> Um I'm in my 20's and hubby's turning 42 and I just had our 2nd baby 4 mo.'s ago and planning to have more in the future but I don't think he's using me to give him some healthy babies


Subliminally he is. . .he's got the evolutionary drive of 1000's of ancestors before him telling him it's up to him and him alone to propagate their genes.

But I am sure he loves you too


----------



## heartsbeating

nice777guy said:


> Haven't read the comments above.
> 
> Recently went to a concert - kind of "Pop-country" if you will - with my wife and my in-laws. Surrounded by a lot of younger girls.
> 
> But there were two women - over 35 who caught my attention more than the younger girls.
> 
> One woman was just very social and outgoing. Her personality was kind of "bubbly." She seemed to be talking to everyone around her. She and her husband were both drinking beer - holding hands - and were both dancing together when the concert started. Yes - she was very "pretty" and a good dancer - but a lot of it was personality.
> 
> Then there were two women with their older daughters (kids were maybe 13 or so) sitting right in front of us. One of the daughters kept taking pictures of her mom. Her Mom was probably a few years older than 35 - and was again very "pretty." But I was just AMAZED at seeing a 13 year old daughter who genuinely seemed to be having a good time with her mother at a concert. Hard to explain - but my wife that night was dressed in a sparkly sliver shirt - showing cleavage - kept taking her own picture. To me - it felt like I was out with a 25 year old - and I don't mean that in a good way. And although the woman in front of us was dressed modestly, I couldn't help but "notice" her - almost like looking at her through her own daughter's eyes. I KNOW how my 11 year old would have reacted to my wife's "LOOK AT ME" behavior and appearance.
> 
> Not sure if this has made much sense. But - to try and sum up - the attaction was only partially physical. And secondly - a lot of it was me being attracted to something I think I'm missing. One woman - drawing attention to herself by just being bubbly. The other - looking like Mom of the Year. Contrasted by my wife - a 39 year old trying to look 10 years younger - taking her OWN picture to put on Facebook to SHOW everyone how much fun she's having.


Sorry to sound like I'm grading a school paper (and not that I'm a teacher) but I have to say this was well written, good insight, which speaks volumes about who you are too. I like how you conveyed the emotion, especially about seeing the woman through her daughter's eyes.


----------



## bunnybear

Scannerguard said:


> Subliminally he is. . .he's got the evolutionary drive of 1000's of ancestors before him telling him it's up to him and him alone to propagate their genes.
> 
> But I am sure he loves you too


actually it's me who wants to have more babies and he's ok with that coz he loves being a daddy.


----------



## nice777guy

heartsbreaking said:


> Sorry to sound like I'm grading a school paper (and not that I'm a teacher) but I have to say this was well written, good insight, which speaks volumes about who you are too. I like how you conveyed the emotion, especially about seeing the woman through her daughter's eyes.


Thanks! Why do I find myself wanting to give you an apple...!!!


----------



## Therealbrighteyes

nice777guy said:


> Thanks! Why do I find myself wanting to give you an apple...!!!


That's a euphamism for something, right?


----------



## nice777guy

Therealbrighteyes said:


> That's a euphamism for something, right?


Perv...

:lol:


----------



## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

Ok, many great answers from the men for traits that make a woman attractive for you. Some pretty hilarious ones also. 

So ...... let’s get to the second part of my question. How or when is the right time to approach her? When do you feel confident or comfortable to make your move, so to speak? 

I’m not trying to sound vain but I’ve been told that I do supposedly possess traits/qualities you guys indicated. Am I so missing the boat on decent guys being interested in me and not picking up on the signals? 

By decent guys, I’m so not referring to the kind of creepy internet/cable intallation guy who wasn’t at my house for all of 2 minutes before he stated I was beautiful and how lucky my husband was. (Of course, I never divulged to him there would be no “husband” residing in this house.) 

Or the somewhat weird-ish pest control guy who commented I was “hot” and what all guys want in a girlfriend. Oddly, I was wearing jeans, t-shirt and trying on new hunting boots from Cabela’s which UPS had just dropped off 5 minutes before when my son came to me and stated someone else was ringing our doorbell. Being 16” snake boots, I couldn’t get them untied fast enough before I got to the door. Chalked the "hot" comment up to the guy being all of 20-ish years old. Point being, I do not dress in outfits which scream “Please notice me .... and all the skin on my female body!" I'm not completely against it and if needed, along with the appropriate setting, I can do hoochie attire. Definitely not an everyday thing for me though.

The majority of my friends are married with young children at home. The ones who are not married, are my guy friends and when we do something together, it is amazing how many people assume we are a couple. So here it is, a long weekend, my son has plans Friday and Saturday evening at friend’s houses, my few single friends have plans and I’m sitting at home alone all weekend. Something is so wrong with this picture because I’ve been doing that way too often.


----------



## LonelyNLost

I agree. What makes a woman approachable? Like what if you have all those characteristics, but men don't approach you. You might get the odd glance, but the guys don't come up to you. Some say I seem stuck up, but I smile warmly and make eye contact. Is something I do intimidating? The only ones that say something are the complete pervs. I'm kind of shy, so maybe I put out a negative vibe.


----------



## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

LonelyNLost said:


> The only ones that say something are the complete pervs.


Ditto!!! It's not just that they are perverts, they are the creepy, almost mangy looking perverts too. I can handle the normal perverts. My ex-husband had plenty of those for friends. LOL!!!


----------



## Mrs.G

unbelievable said:


> Confidence and class. a woman who feels good about herself and is comfortable with her age is just plain beautiful, no matter what age she is. Maybe I'm just strange, but I think most women are beautiful in one way or another. I don't flirt with them and I don't hit on them cause I'm married, but I do admire and respect them. I think God's finest work was the female human. There's nothing better looking, better smelling, or more interesting on earth.


:lol::lol::iagree::iagree::smthumbup::smthumbup:

I can't wait to turn 30. As soon as people hear others answer the age question with twenty _anything_, the young person loses credibility. I am mature enough to admit that I don't know everything.

Whenever I hear the word "pervert", I answer, "Yes?" :rofl::rofl:


----------



## Scannerguard

To answer your question, I guarantee you 6, 7, or 8's are more approachable than 10's. Maybe the fact you are dressing down works to your advantage in these situations.

If it was Maryanne or Ginger and I was on Gilligans Island, 10:1 bet I'd ask Maryann out.

With those country dresses. 

And pigtails.

And those innocent "Are you really going to do me?" eyes with eyelashes batting.

What were we talking about?

Oh yeah, how come the Professor could always fashion a radio out of some vines and coconuts but yet they couldn't build a raft to get off the island?


----------



## Scannerguard

Deep Thoughts With Scannerguard.


----------



## JessiTexas40s

As a 41 yr old woman I get hit on by younger men far more often then older men. Funny young men want cougars and old men want trophies...men! lol


----------



## RandomDude

Other women always have an advantage compared to younger women especially in one thing; depth.

I've always tried to date older, rarely younger (for relationships ne way). My wife is close to her 30s now, (so am I, but a bit behind her), however I've been attracted to women even in their 30s-40s in the past before. However, for me at that time - it was rather awkward when I found out that her son was only 5 years my junior. >.<


----------



## unbelievable

JessiTexas40s said:


> As a 41 yr old woman I get hit on by younger men far more often then older men. Funny young men want cougars and old men want trophies...men! lol


We seasoned guys are not ignoring you, we're just being stealthy. The kids haven't learned that approach, yet.


----------



## Halien

TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore said:


> Ok, many great answers from the men for traits that make a woman attractive for you. Some pretty hilarious ones also.
> 
> So ...... let’s get to the second part of my question. How or when is the right time to approach her? When do you feel confident or comfortable to make your move, so to speak?
> 
> I’m not trying to sound vain but I’ve been told that I do supposedly possess traits/qualities you guys indicated. Am I so missing the boat on decent guys being interested in me and not picking up on the signals?
> 
> By decent guys, I’m so not referring to the kind of creepy internet/cable intallation guy who wasn’t at my house for all of 2 minutes before he stated I was beautiful and how lucky my husband was. (Of course, I never divulged to him there would be no “husband” residing in this house.)
> 
> Or the somewhat weird-ish pest control guy who commented I was “hot” and what all guys want in a girlfriend. Oddly, I was wearing jeans, t-shirt and trying on new hunting boots from Cabela’s which UPS had just dropped off 5 minutes before when my son came to me and stated someone else was ringing our doorbell. Being 16” snake boots, I couldn’t get them untied fast enough before I got to the door. Chalked the "hot" comment up to the guy being all of 20-ish years old. Point being, I do not dress in outfits which scream “Please notice me .... and all the skin on my female body!" I'm not completely against it and if needed, along with the appropriate setting, I can do hoochie attire. Definitely not an everyday thing for me though.
> 
> The majority of my friends are married with young children at home. The ones who are not married, are my guy friends and when we do something together, it is amazing how many people assume we are a couple. So here it is, a long weekend, my son has plans Friday and Saturday evening at friend’s houses, my few single friends have plans and I’m sitting at home alone all weekend. Something is so wrong with this picture because I’ve been doing that way too often.


That's the conundrum. Thing is, its not you. Most guys are just to unsure of themselves to be willing to act on the signals. At our age, most are too out of practice also. To make it worse, you have unintentionally become elevated in our eyes for holding these characteristics.

Since I tend to be the alpha type, I'll admit that this is one area I tend to get into trouble. I just strike up conversations with anyone. I'm not trying to get into some inappropriate relationship. 

I'll give a scenario: I drove a day to meet my son in Nashville recently. While killing time before his flight arrived, I went into our normal store chain for clothes. Needed athletic socks, but hate the cheap kinds. There was an attractive 40ish woman helping her son find pants. All the guys in the men's department were checking her out. She was simply beautiful. Refined and confident, and smiled. Not a one of the abviously single guys (no rings) made a move though, even though her son was staying away from her since there were older guys in the area.

They approached the area where I was looking, and here I am holding white socks. (I'll admit, I can't wear a ring for the job. Nearly lost my finger from doing so when I forgot to take it off while showing a guy how to set up a lathe for a new fuel injection component.) I held up the white pair while she was looking in my direction with a frown and said, "trust me, I don't intend to wear these with these pants." Since I was wearing casual khakis, she laughed and said, "Hey, maybe you're from up north?" With a little "What if I am?" banter, we were talking. (my secondary career is writing, so meeting people is a part of who I am)

My goofy intro gave her the chance to show that she was a warm person, who could smile even when a guy was lame. Not sure if some of the ones you meet aren't going to need a little help in breaking the ice.


----------



## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

Scannerguard said:


> Oh yeah, how come the Professor could always fashion a radio out of some vines and coconuts but yet they couldn't build a raft to get off the island?



LOL! The irony of your comment is how one of the few guys I've dated was a college instructor who has been recently appointed to dean. He is so book smart. However, I have more mechanic technician abilities than he does. He would totally admit to it. Apparently he was explaining to a colleague how I’d fixed his washing machine and the other guy was so impressed. LOL!!!

As a side note: The center post gasket for the washer tub had begun leaking. We needed to pretty much dismantle the entire washing machine and order the part (no parts or repair place local seemed to have it in stock). He was a great brute strength assistant for that project.


----------



## Scannerguard

Well, then. . .you and I would be a match I guess.

Ask any of the women around here and they would all say I am known for my stunning, penetrating, enormous, deep thoughts.


----------



## KJ5000

Confidence, knowing what she wants, more orgasmic, bigger sex drive....
I could go on and on about what makes an older woman attractive.
When was in my early twenties I usually got on better with women that were 6-10 years older.
One thing that is NOT a turn on is this new term "Cougar"
Conjures up vision of older women dressing like teenagers and chasing guys young enough to be their sons.:slap:


----------



## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

KJ5000 said:


> ....... term "Cougar"



Not that long ago my son was getting into our truck while I was loading a few things in the back, and these three younger guys were talking loud enough for me to overhear them (which I'm certain was intended). One of the guys said, “Now that’s a M.I.L.F.” I had heard the expression before and fully knew what it meant. However, it took me a few seconds to realize I was the only female close by. DUH!!! They were talking about me. LOL!!!!


----------



## OhGeesh

bigger sex drive than a 20-22yr old? Unsure of what you did at that age..........quality was definitely much worse, but frequency was way up.

I remember 2-3 times a day in college that has never been repeated...granted often there was more than one girl too.

I don't want to bust "fairytales" but Niceguy777 if that bubbly, funny, confident, chic was 250lbs you wouldn't have been so attracted to her!!

It boils down to looks guys plain and simple.........personality, attitude, demeanor, style, etc etc are all perks the deal sealer is looks.

Of course I'm talking about first meetings and out and about time of interaction. Once love is involved that is the true trump card!!


----------



## nice777guy

OhGeesh said:


> I don't want to bust "fairytales" but Niceguy777 if that bubbly, funny, confident, chic was 250lbs you wouldn't have been so attracted to her!!


Wouldn't be so sure about that. Especially if its a "curvey" 250!

A 250 with a bubbly personality trumps a beauty queen with no personality any day of the week. And at my age, staring at 20 year olds with halter tops and pierced belly buttons just makes me feel like an old pervert!!!

When people ask "what makes a woman good in bed" - the answer rarely comes with measurements. I think the most common answer is ENTHUSIASM - which closely relates to personality.

To quote Spinal Tap - "Big bottoms drive me out of my mind; How could I leave this Behind?"


----------



## nice777guy

TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore said:


> Not that long ago my son was getting into our truck while I was loading a few things in the back, and these three younger guys were talking loud enough for me to overhear them (which I'm certain was intended). One of the guys said, “Now that’s a M.I.L.F.” I had heard the expression before and fully knew what it meant. However, it took me a few seconds to realize I was the only female close by. DUH!!! They were talking about me. LOL!!!!


How about a GILF?

Sounds sick - but I know a woman who is "about" 50 - looks great - who's daughter just had a baby.

Saw a pic of Jane Fonda the other day - 73 maybe? - and she still looks incredible!

Was also thinking about the movie Bull Durham the other day - which probably came out at least 20 years ago. Susan Sarandon was a HOT older woman back and - and still is today.

Makes me wonder if our eyes see women differently as we age...


----------



## JustAGirl

nice777guy said:


> How about a GILF?
> 
> Sounds sick - but I know a woman who is "about" 50 - looks great - who's daughter just had a baby.
> 
> Saw a pic of Jane Fonda the other day - 73 maybe? - and she still looks incredible!
> 
> Was also thinking about the movie Bull Durham the other day - which probably came out at least 20 years ago. Susan Sarandon was a HOT older woman back and - and still is today.
> 
> Makes me wonder if our eyes see women differently as we age...


ew


----------



## nice777guy

Sorry - I'll start my own thread titled "When did I become attracted to GILFS?"!!!!!


----------



## magnoliagal

nice777guy said:


> Makes me wonder if our eyes see women differently as we age...


I hope so. I'm 45 and can't stay young forever.


----------



## Runs like Dog

Go look at a picture of Lena Olin, Anny Duperey or Juliette Greco. Hot? Oh.My.God.


----------



## magnoliagal

See I agree I think Jane Fonda and Susan Sarando look amazing.


----------



## Jellybeans

Susan Sarandon is the sex. She just oozes it.


----------



## JustAGirl

magnoliagal said:


> See I agree I think Jane Fonda and Susan Sarando look amazing.


I do too!

I just can't get over "Jane Fonda" yet....
I'm trying....lol

When I think of "fine" Demi Moore comes to mind...
I know she's only 50ish....but dang now SHE'S HOT!


----------



## Halien

magnoliagal said:


> I hope so. I'm 45 and can't stay young forever.


Let's admit it, 35, or even 45, looks better on some people than others. Some people show age more than others. I'm 45, and as a guy, people tend to peg me much younger. Embarrassingly young. I think the only gray hair I ever had sprouted from my chin. Several of my similar-aged coworkers, though, look older than dirt. I might be wrong, but there seems to be even more variability among women. 

Still, poise, self-confidence and a good sense of humor never grow old.


----------



## Jellybeans

Halien said:


> Still, poise, self-confidence and a good sense of humor never grow old.


So very true.


----------



## Lilyana

I'm about to hit the 35 mark in a few months.. this thread scares me lol

I'm a funny chubby gal with kids going thru a divorce. Never went to college because I chose to get married instead (dumba$$). I feel like crap about myself most of the time...

Guess I should start buying cats now


----------



## nice777guy

Lilyana said:


> I'm about to hit the 35 mark in a few months.. this thread scares me lol
> 
> I'm a funny chubby gal with kids going thru a divorce. Never went to college because I chose to get married instead (dumba$$). *I feel like crap about myself most of the time...*Guess I should start buying cats now


Work on the *bold/underline *part and you'll be just fine...


----------



## ARF

I am 33 and I would have no issue dating a woman 35+ if I were single again. There are so many traits that make a woman attractive though and it varies. I have no specific type physically, but I just have to find them physically attractive. I would like a woman of any age to take pride in their looks. 

Personality, values, sense of humor all play a role as well.


----------



## magnoliagal

Lilyana said:


> I feel like crap about myself most of the time...


This is totally fixable. 35 is so young in my world (I'm 45). I think wow what I could have done in 10 years if I knew then what I know now. 

Skip the cats and change your life.


----------



## Lilyana

I'm a work in progress...I do feel better since throwing out my STBX. I even took some pictures of myself and posted them on facebook, before my facebook was all pictures of my kids. I was one of those that always ran when a camera came out lol

It's a long hard road, but I'm working on it.


----------



## JustAGirl

Lilyana said:


> I'm a work in progress...I do feel better since throwing out my STBX. I even took some pictures of myself and posted them on facebook, before my facebook was all pictures of my kids. I was one of those that always ran when a camera came out lol
> 
> It's a long hard road, but I'm working on it.


YOU GO GIRL!

Love yourself and the rest will come!

*BTW - you have a GREAT sense of humor* :smthumbup:


> Guess I should start buying cats now


----------



## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

nice777guy said:


> Susan Sarandon was a HOT older woman back and - and still is today.





magnoliagal said:


> See I agree I think Jane Fonda and Susan Sarandon look amazing.





Jellybeans said:


> Susan Sarandon is the sex. She just oozes it.


:iagree: Ironically I was at a friends house a few days ago and a milk commercial with Susan Sarandon came on the TV. I stated, “Dang, she still looks good for her age.” He agreed and said something like, “Ya, and she’s getting up there.”


----------



## LonelyNLost

I just have to say, I love this thread. 

I'm 32, going through a divorce, and realizing there's more to life than relationships. I'm finding myself and I really like myself. I feel good. This thread makes me feel good about the future, and about men in general. I think I'm in my prime!


----------



## Runs like Dog

I'm tired out, exhausted, burned to a crisp. Mother me. Hold me.


----------



## JustAGirl

Runs like Dog said:


> I'm tired out, exhausted, burned to a crisp. Mother me. Hold me.


(((HUG))) *applies aloe*


----------



## Conrad

magnoliagal said:


> This is totally fixable. 35 is so young in my world (I'm 45). I think wow what I could have done in 10 years if I knew then what I know now.
> 
> Skip the cats and change your life.


Magnolia,

Let yourself off the hook.

We learn things when we're ready - and not one minute sooner.

Just be glad you have it now.

Most never get a clue.


----------



## Scannerguard

Um, I want my young hottie and I'll have her, thank you very much.

Not sure why the forum is trying to spoil my midlife crisis here.


----------



## JustAGirl

Scannerguard said:


> Um, I want my young hottie and I'll have her, thank you very much.
> 
> Not sure why the forum is trying to spoil my midlife crisis here.


:rofl:


----------



## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore

JustAGirl ~

Have to say, I love that avatar. :smthumbup:


----------



## JustAGirl

TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore said:


> JustAGirl ~
> 
> Have to say, I love that avatar. :smthumbup:


lol thanks!


----------



## Zaphod

The same thing that makes any woman attractive to me:

Keeps herself fit physically and mentally; meaning no major hang ups or mental issues, as well as somebody who hasn't decided that after the ring went on the need to keep herself healthy went away.

Pretty (totally subjective, but my "type" is the innocent looking girl-next-door Jennifer Aniston types, as opposed to the way too made up "glamorous" types)

Exudes sexuality (doesn't have to mean trashy by the way)

Dresses in a way that does not suggest that she's mentally on the journey to being 70.

Doesn't hate/seethe about men

Reasonably long hair (yep, I said it, short hair normally hits around the late 20's and sticks with an awful lot of women for some reason and wow, it's just not my cup of tea).

Hasn't thrown in the towel on her youthful idealism

Has my sexual kinks


----------



## ShuttleDIK

> What makes a 35+ woman attractive to you?


She's a woman.










PAOWH!


----------



## dbj1971

Good afternoon, Ladies.

First of all, there is beauty in every woman. It reminds me of Don Juan Demarco's (movie) comment, made by actor Johnny Depp, and one of my favorite quotes from that movie. He is speaking about the beauty he finds in all woman:

"By seeing beyond what is visible to the eye. Now there are those, of course, who do not share my perceptions, it's true. When I say that all my woman are dazzling beauties, they object. The nose of this one is too large; the-the hips of another, they are too wide; perhaps the breasts of a third, they are too small. But I see these women for how they truly are... glorious, radiant, spectacular, and perfect, because, I am not limited by my eyesight."

Now, this is not to say that some women aren't especially gifted with physical attractiveness, but the charm of that wears off very fast if she doesn't have a warm, attractive personality. By that I mean:

Fun to be with (playful, sense of humor)
Unselfish
Doesn't put others down (including other women)
Has vitality, spunk, verve, energy (whatever you may call it)
Is comfortable with her body and has confidence
Is able to enjoy sensuality and knows what she likes and wants and communicates it (we can't read minds)
Really enjoys others' company (friends, relatives, dates) - makes others feel appreciated
Really enjoys life and lives each day to the full

You know the kind of person I'm talking about - the kind who makes you feel like you're the only person in the room when they're talking to you, that makes you laugh, but can be serious too, and just makes you feel enriched to have been in their company, whether intimately or just in a casual conversation. 

With that said, any woman can be sexy and beautiful, because it's already within them. It's a choice, an attitude, it's spirit, it's an action. An attractive woman is one who embraces her feminity as a strength and celebrates it by living life to the full and being the best she can be. She is discrete but not closed off, friendly but not loose, sensual but not unfaithful. She is comfortable in her own skin and, like Adele, realizes she can be awesomely beautiful without being 105 pounds.

Women only get better with age. I'm a 41 year-old man, and I don't think younger women are more desirable than "older" (over 40) women. My wife is 39 and will be 40 this September, but I've been with her since she was 16 and I can honestly say she is more sexy and beautiful to me now than ever. I tell her so, too. (This is not a gratuitous comment - she doesn't log onto there so I have no brownie points to gain by that comment). 

One of the saddest things to me is how "******* Avenue" (ie, marketing) exploits the insecurities of men and women. With women, it's the fear of aging (or the appearance of it), and with men it's their penis size. In reality, it's what you do with what you got that counts.

The one problem I believe men have in dating older women is that these women have now lived long enough to have had one or more bad experiences with men, and can (if not careful) generalize a bad attitude toward all men ("all men are dogs" etc.). Older women might be jaded by the bad experiences they've had. On the other hand, maybe they're more mature and appreciate the things that matter. Maybe they have learned what they like and how they like to be pleased, and they have fully accepted and embraced themselves. 

A real man searches the beauty that a woman possesses, and appreciates it. Another quote: 

"Women react to me the way that they do, Don Octavio, because they sense that I search out the beauty that dwells within until it overwhelms everything else. And then they cannot avoid their desire, to release that beauty and envelope me in it."

"Every true lover knows that the moment of greatest satisfaction comes when ecstasy is long over and he beholds before him the flower which has blossomed beneath his touch."

You will notice that in my list of what makes a woman 35+ (or any woman) attractive does not include physical attributes. I'm not denying their existance or effect, but we men have probably all been around a physically gifted women who, after awhile, makes us feel like not wanting to be around them or who is not enjoyable to be around. Some physically attractive women seem to think they can just coast along on their looks alone, and so they don't have to put forth effort to develop their personality or be polite. On the other hand, we've been around women whom the world might not pick as the most physically attractive, but there was something about them that makes a man feel alive, energized, and warm in her presence. It's that playfulness, a smile, good conversation, a connection. It's a feeling of appreciation, of a fun person who is genuinely interested in someone other than herself.

Ladies, remember that age is an attitude. You can be old at 30 and young at 50. Do you understand what I'm saying? It's your attitude and your zest (that's one word I was looking for earlier) for life that makes the difference. 

Come on, guys, let's be honest. What makes cheerleaders so attractive (okay, laugh, laugh, besides the physical)? Truly, that's not really it. I see ladies every day who look like they could be models. It's really more than just surface appearance. It's their energy that they exude. They look like they're having fun, they smile, and they have all that energy. 

Ladies should be encouraged to know that while they should take care of themselves the best they can, they can be very sexy and attractive to men if they make the conscious choice and attitude to be so. Put aside your insecurities, your hangups, and put away the microscope you had focused on all your faults and imperfections. 

There are men who want "real women," not air-brushed fantasies. Just delight in your womanhood and be the type of person you would like to be around yourself. Trust me, a man truly worthy of your time and affection will see and appreciate this from within you, and be drawn to your femininity.

To the beauty in all of you Ladies,
Warm regards,
DJ


----------



## tacoma

TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore said:


> This is somewhat of a stolen thread topic concept from *southbound*. What makes a 35+ woman attractive to you guys?


The same things that make a 25 year old girl attractive to me with the added knowledge that the 35 year old actually knows how to use those things.




> Also, what would make you have the courage to approach that woman and strike up a conversation if you noticed there was no wedding ring?


She`d have to show "some" interest, a smile, "the look", something before I`d directly approach her.


----------



## Jellybeans

tacoma said:


> The same things that make a 25 year old girl attractive to me with the added knowledge that the 35 year old *actually knows how to use those things*.
> .


Forgive my ignorance.......what "things?"

LOL

and yes I am being serious.


----------



## tacoma

Jellybeans said:


> Forgive my ignorance.......what "things?"
> 
> LOL
> 
> and yes I am being serious.


-Hair (I have a preference for brunettes)
-Eyes (Brunettes are even better with blue eyes)
-Body(I`ll have mine petite please)
-Intelligence/Wit ( I love a sharp tongue on a quick woman)
-Carriage (When a woman carries herself with confidence it's sexy to me)

From the OP`s outline it sounds as if we`re talking about meeting someone for the first time.
If that`s so then the above is all I`d have to go on probably.
25 or 35 if you have enough of what I find attractive in at least a couple of those categories you`ll interest me.


Where the 35 year old wins out is 

-Life experience/knowledge( Sex is great but you`ve got to be able to talk about something during the lulls.

This is actually where my preference for the 35 year old is won over. I`d be better able to relate to her.


----------



## dbj1971

Dean,

That's a good point. I can understand that women have to watch their backs for the criminals and the predators, but generally when a man smiles and says hello, he's not necessarily 1) flirting, 2) trying to pick you up, 3) a stalker, or 4) thinks that if you smile and say hi, you're giving him the green light to seduce. I'm concerned that in the (understandable) effort to protect ourselves and keep from giving the wrong signals, we've gone too far in the other direction. For all our instant messaging and modern communications technology, we've becomre more of a shut-off, closed society. We're suspicious of everyone, people don't say hello as much, women are closed off because 1) they are tired of being "hit on" and overreact to any man just being civil and saying good day as a pickup attempt; 2) they may have had an ex-stalker boyfriend and so their leery; 3) they think that if they smile and say hello to a man that he will want to get in their pants; etc. It's ironic that the more communication capability we have, the more we're losing our ability to be just plain civil. People look-past each other and are withdrawn into their own worlds. I'm not saying total strangers should just strike up a conversation like long-lost best friends, but let's find a happy balance somewhere.

Ladies, Dean's statement is simple yet profound: smile and say hello. This is the outgoing friendliness that is so attractive. Just for the mere fact that this seems to be rather rare nowadays, some man somewhere might take it to mean a bit more than it does, just because in doing so you'll stand out because so many others don't do this simple gesture. 

Being attractive really isn't hard and doesn't cost thousands of dollars. It does take effort - effort to be kind, to converse, to focus on other people and their concerns and words, not just our own, and to smile and say hello and just be likable human beings. If you ladies would smile and just be civil, and not make us pay with your defense shields because some other guys were cads and tried cheesy pickup lines and shut you off to the rest of the guys, then your natural feminity that is so attractive to the masculine polarity of men will be free to shine through.

DJ


----------



## hookares

Thirty five would be turning the clock way back should a lady of that age were to find me acceptable. As a matter of fact, so would one fifteen years older.


----------



## sinnister

Pretty feet = good.

Busted feet = bad.

The end.


----------



## chillymorn

her very large........................













bank account! first time love second time money


----------



## uhaul4mybaggage

but not past 45?


----------



## uhaul4mybaggage

Duke said:


> There are a LOT of beautiful women between 35-45 YO. The first thing that catches my eye is a great smile! Besides that a fun attitude, confidence, and doesn't have to have a perfect body but a woman that takes care of herself. An elegant look is more attractive than super casual I'd say. Heels not flip flops.
> 
> I'm 45 FWIW.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I'm 46. So, I can't be good looking?


----------



## Caribbean Man

Nice thread!

Too bad it was started before I joined TAM.

In my opinion , and this is just my opinion.
Doesn't mean that this has any bearing on anyone else's reality.

In my opinion, women look their best, and are at their sexual prime between the ages of 35 - 55.
Between those magical ages it's almost as if a switch is flipped on inside of them and insecurities simply disappear. They are comfortable with their bodies and natural self whether they are well dressed or naked.
I think that inner self confidence comes through real life experiences and a deeper understanding of themselves.[ those that actually work on themselves and have that.]



Men on the other hand tend to look their best between 17 - 40. They tend not to question their sexual ability between those ages because everything's still " functional." After 40 , very few men maintain themselves.


----------



## Betrayedone

uhaul4mybaggage said:


> I'm 46. So, I can't be good looking?


I like 46.....I like 56!


----------



## Betrayedone

Caribbean Man said:


> Nice thread!
> 
> Too bad it was started before I joined TAM.
> 
> In my opinion , and this is just my opinion.
> Doesn't mean that this has any bearing on anyone else's reality.
> 
> In my opinion, women look their best, and are at their sexual prime between the ages of 35 - 55.
> Between those magical ages it's almost as if a switch is flipped on inside of them and insecurities simply disappear. They are comfortable with their bodies and natural self whether they are well dressed or naked.
> I think that inner self confidence comes through real life experiences and a deeper understanding of themselves.[ those that actually work on themselves and have that.]
> 
> 
> 
> Men on the other hand tend to look their best between 17 - 40. They tend not to question their sexual ability between those ages because everything's still " functional." After 40 , very few men maintain themselves.


I was a goofball at 17 and beyond. I had no clue as to being sexual.......I am 55 and in the best overall physical and mental (present divorce burp excepted) condition of my life. I feel as though I have really awakened and emerged into the best man I will ever become. I have no idea how long this period will last. I feel a great sense of loss, however, because the man I have become is ultimately the man my stbxw was looking for all along. She will never know and I find that incredibly sad...........D


----------



## suesmith

Heck.. I'm 57 and my divorce was final yesterday. But from the sounds of this thread...... I should go find some cats!


----------



## RClawson

Seriously? How about that she is not 25.


----------



## WorkingOnMe

On the list of things that make a woman attractive to me I'm afraid that her age isn't listed. It's really all about how she treats me. I guess I'm starving for someone nice. That trumps age any day.


----------



## PreRaphaelite

Women over 35 have often been around the block a few times, and unless they turn into cougars, they can be some of the best companions around --unless you're a young stud I guess 

And good companions can make some great lovers.


----------



## jnyu44

If you believe that personality matters more than looks, then a woman at 35 is just about as great as she was at 25.

Every man wants and needs something different. 

I fall firm in the workaholic borderline family negligent camp. If I found a 35 yo woman who knew how to build a strong relationship in this sort of context (cuz I clearly don't), sign me up a million times over...

...and I think that translates into someone who is selfless and willing to put the relationship before herself, good temperament, and patient. Very tough thing to expect from someone though as I put career first, am impatient, and stubborn.


----------



## Philat

This thread is so old the OP implies that Matthew McConaughey is a stud (seen him lately?).

I guess 35+ doesn't refer to bust size...


----------



## jld

WorkingOnMe said:


> On the list of things that make a woman attractive to me I'm afraid that her age isn't listed. It's really all about how she treats me. I guess I'm starving for someone nice. That trumps age any day.


Oh, WOM. Everybody feels bad for you. We all hope your wife is secretly reading this. You really are not asking for very much.

And if you really feel like you are starving, maybe you should just get a divorce. I think you stay for your child, right? 

But if you are so unhappy, it might be better for your child and you if you just call it quits and find someone who can feed you.


----------



## I Notice The Details

35+ year old women who are confident with their bodies and do their best to stay in shape are extremely attractive:


----------



## GettingIt_2

I Notice The Details said:


> 35+ year old women who are confident with their bodies and do their best to stay in shape are extremely attractive:


Professional lighting, hair/makeup/wardrobe, and generous photo editing sure don't hurt, either!


----------



## Caribbean Man

GettingIt said:


> Professional lighting, hair/makeup/wardrobe, and generous photo editing sure don't hurt, either!


lol,

She could be 60 years old , but we can never know from that pic!


----------



## Kria

The question is asked as if women 35 and up can't be attractive or something. Being under 35 does not necessarily make a woman attractive.


----------



## NextTimeAround

Kria said:


> The question is asked as if women 35 and up can't be attractive or something. Being under 35 does not necessarily make a woman attractive.


I find this interesting. Those 35- are not necessarily fitter, healthier or even more fertile.

Excess weight, the high incidences of chlamydia among young women make them nearly as(in)fertile as those 35+.

I have heard that on OLD, some men will say that they want children just to justify the younger and sometimes greater differences in age of the women that they seek.


----------



## MarkTwain

PBear said:


> Even on her worst days, she never looks like an escapee from Walmart.


Not far from me lives a woman who is a drug dealer. She often looks un-well. She is too thin. I am guessing she is 45ish. She tries to be a good mother. Obviously, that does not work out too well, but her kid does at least look healthy and happy.

She is not my type for multiple reasons, but yet this woman still has a kind of magnetism. Imagine what she could achieve if she cleaned up her act.

I have not yet met a woman who could not shine in some way given the right motivation. And I am not being selective here. Even the wall-mart escapees eluded too earlier in this thread are included.

Since splitting up from my wife nearly 4 years ago, I have been looking for a "Heart of Gold" to quote Neil Young. I find golden hearts attractive. Everyone has a nugget of gold hidden away somewhere in their heart. But if you notice that little nugget of gold in your own heart and focus on it night and day, fan the flames - so to speak - it will take you over and you will be transformed into pure gold.

Now _that's _what I call attractive


----------



## The Cro-Magnon

TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore said:


> This is somewhat of a stolen thread topic concept from *southbound*. What makes a 35+ woman attractive to you guys? Also, what would make you have the courage to approach that woman and strike up a conversation if you noticed there was no wedding ring? Physical and personality traits are acceptable answers on this one. There truly are no wrong answers.
> 
> However, try to refrain from the whole “She needs to look like Carrie Underwood, Scarlett Johansson, Jessica Biel or Megan Fox,” because they are *SOOOO* not even close to 35 years old. I’m certain you guys would hate to have the ladies play the whole “He needs to look like Matthew McConaughey,” comparison card.
> 
> Have at it guys!


I have had girls in their 20's of late express interest in me lately, who I thought were repulsive on the inside, yet I have met an unwed physiotherapist in her mid 30's who I thought was gorgeous, even though most would say she was conventionally unattractive. She was awkward, gangly, sincere, intelligent, and did not wear make up, just how I like women. I didn't even bother trying to talk to her though, as she would most likely have a list of demands up the wazoo, 6ft+ tall, rich, handsome, etc.

I also get matched with various women on this dating site I lacklustrely signed up to, they send me constant emails, and they are all horrendous and shallow women, out of nowhere though, I was matched to a 35yo woman in my city, though originally from Switzerland I believe, and although most would say she is not attractive, I thought she was perfect, into bushwalking, diving, climbing, travelling, does not need make up. Again, can't bring myself to message her, as I just know she would only be wanting "Fabio" and would not really want someone like me.

I dunno if that helped answer your question, I guess I can see endless "pretty" women and feel nothing for them, but a woman who has her feet on the ground, who is real, who likes to do the same things as me, and who doesn't wear make up, I find very attractive, and I would stand by such a woman to hell and back.


----------



## Jellybeans

Caribbean Man said:


> Men on the other hand tend to look their best between 17 - 40. They tend not to question their sexual ability between those ages because everything's still " functional." After 40 , very few men maintain themselves.


Oh I don't know. There are plenty of men in their 40s who are way hotter in that decade that they've ever been previously. There is something about the forty-ish man.


----------



## Caribbean Man

Jellybeans said:


> Oh I don't know. There are plenty of men in their 40s who are way hotter in that decade that they've ever been previously. There is something about the forty-ish man.



:lol: I'm 44.
But men like us who look hotter really have to try very hard.
When grey hairs start appearing, self confidence can take a hit. Confidence doesn't come naturally, especially with so many younger , well sculptured bodies around in the media , billboards etc , etc.
But beer guts are no longer tolerated..:rofl:


----------



## Jellybeans

Ah, so men do suffer the same as women! 

LOL.


----------



## Sandfly

The Cro-Magnon said:


> I have had girls in their 20's of late express interest in me lately, who *I thought were *repulsive on the inside, yet I have met an unwed physiotherapist in her mid 30's who I thought was gorgeous, even though most would say she was conventionally unattractive. She was awkward, gangly, sincere, intelligent, and did not wear make up, just how I like women. I didn't even bother trying to talk to her though, as she *would most likely *have a list of demands up the wazoo, 6ft+ tall, rich, handsome, etc.
> 
> I also get matched with various women on this dating site I lacklustrely signed up to, they send me constant emails, and they are all horrendous and shallow women, out of nowhere though, I was matched to a 35yo woman in my city, though originally from Switzerland I believe, and although most would say she is not attractive,* I thought she was perfect*, into bushwalking, diving, climbing, travelling, does not need make up. Again, can't bring myself to message her, as I just know she would only be wanting "Fabio" and would not really want someone like me.
> 
> I dunno if that helped answer your question, I guess I can see endless "pretty" women and feel nothing for them, but a woman who has her feet on the ground, who is real, who likes to do the same things as me, and who doesn't wear make up, I find very attractive, and I would stand by such a woman to hell and back.


This is rich coming from me, 

but I recognise what you are doing as 'projecting' onto people you don't yet know. Don't bother with the internet, it's for girls who already have casual 'nice' boyfriends who want unprotected sex with 'fun' strangers. Not at all worth it.

Many years ago, I thought I'd found a girl, younger, who was shy, naïve, hardworking, honest, no tattoos, dressed modestly etc - you know ideal for longterm. When I dated her, I found out that she lived with her grandparents because she was out of control, her dad was god knows where, her sister was a drug addict, and her past boyfriends had all been revolting wannabe gangsters. She was also not that hardworking and thoroughly dishonest. 

You are looking for a particular _personality_, yet you are sifting the applicants by _appearance_. To repeat the previous point, you are also searching through a medium designed for affair-sex to find a long-term partner. Does this make sense to you?

I believe that with this faulty thinking of yours, you wouldn't have noticed all the flaws in this 'innocent' girl I described to you, and you would now be paying child support to a drugged up narcissistic brat, looking on helplessly as your son/daughter's mother surrounded your child with abusers and losers.

You should stop projecting and introduce yourself to the women who interest you. There is nothing preventing you from walking away if they turn out slaggy. Just treat it as practice - which is good, for the real world. You will likely meet someone serious in a social club or hiking club where your interests co-incide, than in a bar or chatroom.

Don't be a sucker when you do meet people too. Stop projecting: pay attention instead to what you _really _see and hear, and stop treating a good woman as a 'scarce commodity', you yourself through this mindset are making them rarer than they are, which will make you needy and clingy the effect of which is: when you do meet them, they'll sense fake-niceness/desperation and they'll run. 

In reality, there are more than enough good ones, you just need to increase your chances of meeting them, by going to the right places, being patient and not too eager and simply spend time ... meeting them and enjoying their company - getting to know the real person, before even thinking of dating them.

Chances are, if you're happy-go-lucky and not pushy, they'll give you the signals anyway.

S.


----------



## Sandfly

Caribbean Man said:


> :lol: I'm 44.
> But men like us who look hotter really have to try very hard.
> When grey hairs start appearing, self confidence can take a hit. Confidence doesn't come naturally, especially with so many younger , well sculptured bodies around in the media , billboards etc , etc.
> But beer guts are no longer tolerated..:rofl:


I know what you mean bro.

As a former Adonis, it's not easy.


----------



## jld

Dh is getting grey hair, and I think it is very sexy! 

What is it with guys and their hair?!


----------



## Sandfly

jld said:


> Dh is getting grey hair, and I think it is very sexy!
> 
> What is it with guys and their hair?!


Jld, there is silver-grey, a noble shade, distinguished and sexy, like the "Sizovo orla" (grey steppe eagle) of the Russian ballad Katyusha,

then there is ashen grey, which CM and I have. Sigh... 

I'm only in my thirties dangnammit !!


----------



## Jellybeans

I developed my first "older man" crush (in real life, not a celebrity) when I met a man last year in his late 40s. I seriously have never been attracted to anyone that much older than me before. I cannot aptly describe how badly I wanted to jump on this man. He is soooooooooooo hot. Wrinkles, some grey hairs and all! I think he thinks I am too young for him. Lame!


----------



## jld

There is something about older men, isn't there, JB? Just so appealing.

I trust dh 100%, but I am sure younger women are drawn to him. 

It's that hair!


----------



## Jellybeans

Hehe. I don't know if it's the hair, it's just the je ne sais quoi about certain men. 

Before that experience, I'd only been attracted to men my own age so I was like, Hellllllllllo, Daddy-o! HAHA.


----------



## arbitrator

*What impresses me more than anything about the older woman is that she has the innate sense of sophistication that younger gals all too often lack. Also, she is more worldly and usually more educated. And not to even mention that she is far more experienced in family affairs.

With rare exception, those of us who are notably older, can look past some of the wrinkles and excess poundage, knowing that they often are the prerequisites of that experience.

Just seeing how she looks after herself, both physically and psychologically, examining her interior first, seeing how she loves and is loved, and then to the exterior elements, seeing how she looks after and respects herself, is preeminently what sparks my interest in her!*


----------



## jld

Jellybeans said:


> Hehe. I don't know if it's the hair, it's just the je ne sais quoi about certain men.
> 
> Before that experience, I'd only been attracted to men my own age so I was like, Hellllllllllo, Daddy-o! HAHA.


Giggle, giggle


----------



## Sandfly

Jellybeans said:


> I developed my first "older man" crush (in real life, not a celebrity) when I met a man last year in his late 40s. I seriously have never been attracted to anyone that much older than me before. I cannot aptly describe how badly I wanted to jump on this man. He is soooooooooooo hot. Wrinkles, some grey hairs and all! I think he thinks I am too young for him. Lame!


I'm not in my late 40's, and you should have said something sooner. I've got wrinkles?!

OK srsly

We get the same thing too. The only woman who set fire to my loins by simply talking and spending time with me was 50. I went on a date with her, and I was 24 or so at the time, so at least I gave it a shot 

This is what she looked like:










This is her accent, manners and voice:



I knew there was no future in it, but I've never been so motivated.


----------



## jld

I hope you find someone soon, arbitrator!


----------



## jld

She is beautiful, Sandfly!


----------



## Sandfly

arbitrator said:


> *What impresses me more than anything about the older woman is that she has the innate sense of sophistication that younger gals all too often lack. Also, she is more worldly and usually more educated. And not to even mention that she is far more experienced in family affairs.
> 
> With rare exception, those of us who are notably older, can look past some of the wrinkles and excess poundage, knowing that they often are the prerequisites of that experience.
> 
> Just seeing how she looks after herself, both physically and psychologically, examining her interior first, seeing how she loves and is loved, and then to the exterior elements, seeing how she looks after and respects herself, is preeminently what sparks my interest in her!*


Tres bien, m'sieur!

je suis d'accord à cent pourcent.


----------



## hawx20

My wife is 41 and I find her as beautiful as anyone. Sure, her body isnt as tight as a 20 year old, but thats okay, it still looks damn good!

My wife and I are both pretty lucky that we look much younger than our actual age. I'm 39 and one of my coworkers girlfriends thought I was 25. My wife could pass for 30.

Young girls can be hot with perfect bodies, but not much going on upstairs. They are fun to play with, but not fun to be with.

Older women can also be very fun to play with, usually play better, and also fun to be with.


----------



## Sandfly

jld said:


> She is beautiful, Sandfly!


Yes, but even more radiant in her gracefulness and polished manners. Looks alone wouldn't have got me asking for a private interview.

oh my word! They don't make 'em like that anymore.


----------



## jld

Je savais pas que tu parlais francais. En fete, tu l'ecris meilleur que moi.

Sheesh, I had to have ds14 look at this, and he's not sure it's correctly written, either, blush.


----------



## jld

hawx20, you have the right attitude. I'm sure your wife appreciates it.


----------



## southern wife

Caribbean Man said:


> Nice thread!
> 
> Too bad it was started before I joined TAM.
> 
> In my opinion , and this is just my opinion.
> Doesn't mean that this has any bearing on anyone else's reality.
> 
> In my opinion, women look their best, and are at their sexual prime between the ages of 35 - 55.
> Between those magical ages it's almost as if a switch is flipped on inside of them and insecurities simply disappear. They are comfortable with their bodies and natural self whether they are well dressed or naked.
> I think that inner self confidence comes through real life experiences and a deeper understanding of themselves.[ those that actually work on themselves and have that.]
> 
> 
> 
> Men on the other hand tend to look their best between 17 - 40. They tend not to question their sexual ability between those ages because everything's still " functional." After 40 , very few men maintain themselves.


Just wanted to chime in and say that my husband did not really start taking *the best* care of himself until after he turned 40. He just turned 44 and in the last 6 months he has lost 25 lbs. He's always walked or rode his bike for exercise and lifted weights, but never actually lost the weight he wanted to lose until recently. He's looking great....the best he's ever looked!


----------



## southern wife

Betrayedone said:


> I was a goofball at 17 and beyond. I had no clue as to being sexual.......I am 55 and in the best overall physical and mental (present divorce burp excepted) condition of my life. I feel as though I have really awakened and emerged into the best man I will ever become. I have no idea how long this period will last. I feel a great sense of loss, however, because the man I have become is ultimately the man my stbxw was looking for all along. She will never know and I find that incredibly sad...........D


Aaahhhh but there you are......ripe for the picking of the next fine lady to share yourself with! :smthumbup:

I much prefer older men, to younger or even my age men.


----------



## southern wife

I Notice The Details said:


> 35+ year old women who are confident with their bodies and do their best to stay in shape are extremely attractive:


How did you get that pic of me?


----------



## southern wife

Jellybeans said:


> Oh I don't know. There are plenty of men in their 40s who are way hotter in that decade that they've ever been previously. There is something about the forty-ish man.


:iagree:

Even 50-ish and 60-ish if they take care of themselves!


----------



## hawx20

jld said:


> hawx20, you have the right attitude. I'm sure your wife appreciates it.



No, not really....she cheated on me.....I bet she appreciates me now much more though


----------



## NextTimeAround

hawx20 said:


> My wife is 41 and I find her as beautiful as anyone. *Sure, her body isnt as tight as a 20 year old, but thats okay, *it still looks damn good!
> 
> My wife and I are both pretty lucky that we look much younger than our actual age. I'm 39 and one of my coworkers girlfriends thought I was 25. My wife could pass for 30.
> 
> Young girls can be hot with perfect bodies, but not much going on upstairs. They are fun to play with, but not fun to be with.
> 
> Older women can also be very fun to play with, usually play better, and also fun to be with.


Could we stop with the charades that younger women are necessarily fitter than older women. There's an obesity epdiemic going on out there and a lot of 20 and 30 somethings are really out of control with their wieght.

to keep talking about older women as if somewhow we are even fatter than they are is beyond disbelief.

I'll have you know that my fiance was dating before me a woman 21 years younger than I am; who self described as 50 pounds overweight; who admitted that she was getting tested already for diabetes, cholesterol and she told my fiance that she was being referred to a nephrologist......I actually had to look that one up(kidney and or liver specialist, big weekend drinker); to compare herself favorably to me (at 50 yo at the time) she had to say, well, at least it's better than cancer.

So if you think that someone 29yo (as she was) is a much better choice a much more beuatiful --inside and out-- well, some people can be their own worst enemy.


----------



## jld

hawx20 said:


> No, not really....she cheated on me.....I bet she appreciates me now much more though


Oh, I am so sorry, hawx. I am assuming you are reconciling. Gosh, that must be hard.

I hope you two can work things out, and be happier and stronger going forward. Best of luck.


----------



## jld

NextTimeAround, I think it depends on the woman, not necessarily the age. Some women really take the time and make the effort to eat well and exercise, however old they are. This may have a lot to do with education level and social class.

Every age has its benefits, I think.


----------



## Duguesclin

jld said:


> Je savais pas que tu parlais francais. En fete, tu l'ecris meilleur que moi.


Correction:
Je ne savais pas que tu parlais le francais. En fait, tu l'ecris mieux que moi.


----------



## I Notice The Details

southern wife said:


> How did you get that pic of me?


SW...with your personality and beauty, I bet that could be you in that picture. You are such a sweetie!


----------



## NextTimeAround

jld said:


> NextTimeAround, I think it depends on the woman, not necessarily the age. Some women really take the time and make the effort to eat well and exercise, however old they are. This may have a lot to do with education level and social class.
> 
> Every age has its benefits, I think.


The one I am talking about has master's and it looks as if she comes from a middle class family. She's Jewish. I don't think there are too many Jews in the lower classses and they are for the most part very well educated.


----------



## hawx20

NextTimeAround said:


> Could we stop with the charades that younger women are necessarily fitter than older women. There's an obesity epdiemic going on out there and a lot of 20 and 30 somethings are really out of control with their wieght.
> 
> to keep talking about older women as if somewhow we are even fatter than they are is beyond disbelief.
> 
> So if you think that someone 29yo (as she was) is a much better choice a much more beuatiful --inside and out-- well, some people can be their own worst enemy.


You missed the point on that one. I didnt say ANY 20 year old has a fitter body than someone in their 40s. My wife is 41 years old and is in great shape. A 20 year old in great shape is going to have a firmer body. 

Just like how a 20 year old woman doesnt have to worry about wrinkles as a 40 year old would. Its just age. All I was saying was that I love her body and wouldnt trade it in for a younger person. I love every inch of her body.


----------



## jld

hawx20 said:


> All I was saying was that I love her body and wouldnt trade it in for a younger person. I love every inch of her body.


This is very good. This is how my dh feels, too. 

Was this part of why you decided to reconcile, this strong physical attraction to your wife?


----------



## Caribbean Man

The owner of my gym and his wife is a former professional bodybuilder and his wife , a fitness model.

His wife is one of the fittest women in that gym, having one of those impossible - to - get physiques.
Waistline somewhere around 28" and her hips would be 38". [ I know these things because I am in that industry.]
Completely flat stomach , she mostly wears tank tops and yoga shorts.
Firm body with really decent cuts/ muscle definition in her abs , arms and legs.
I knew her husband's age, he's 43.
I used to think she was about 30 - ish.
Until I met her kids.
Her eldest daughter is 20 yrs old , so I asked her what was her age.
She smiled , and showed me her driver's licence.

She's 46.


----------



## NextTimeAround

hawx20 said:


> You missed the point on that one. I didnt say ANY 20 year old has a fitter body than someone in their 40s. My wife is 41 years old and is in great shape. A 20 year old in great shape is going to have a firmer body.
> 
> Just like how a 20 year old woman doesnt have to worry about wrinkles as a 40 year old would. Its just age. All I was saying was that I love her body and wouldnt trade it in for a younger person. I love every inch of her body.



Thanks for the clarification. What you wrote:



> My wife is 41 and I find her as beautiful as anyone. Sure, her body isnt as tight as a 20 year old, but thats okay, it still looks damn good!


sounded to me as if you were comparing your wife's body to every and any 20 yo. but there are these days a whole bunch of fat 20 year olds.

Regarding lines on the face, I have seen a few with the lines across the forehead while they are in their 20s. 

There are a few men who agree that this is one time in hman history in which the 40+ crowd look better and are in better health than the 20 something crowd. 

How's that for progress and industrialisation.


----------



## Betrayedone

southern wife said:


> Aaahhhh but there you are......ripe for the picking of the next fine lady to share yourself with! :smthumbup:
> 
> I much prefer older men, to younger or even my age men.


.....we've met someone......and I think she likes me.....


----------



## Betrayedone

southern wife said:


> :iagree:
> 
> Even 50-ish and 60-ish if they take care of themselves!


Oh HELL yes!


----------



## hawx20

jld said:


> This is very good. This is how my dh feels, too.
> 
> Was this part of why you decided to reconcile, this strong physical attraction to your wife?



No. I love every inch of her body because its her body. Her body looks great for her age but I know I could probably get someone younger if I wanted. So no, the physical attraction had very little to do with my decision.


----------



## jld

What made you decide to stay?


----------



## roostr

I havnt read the entire thread but though I would put in my two cents. Being 53, and to me, if I had a choice between a 25 year old pretty woman and a 40 year old pretty woman, Id absolutely go for the 40 year old without a doubt. 

The fact that I have a 22 year old daughter probably factors in to the fact that I typically don't look at women in their 20's in that way. But mostly, its the maturity level of a woman that would be the difference for me. 

In my mind, as far as looks go, there is nothing that a 25 year old woman would have over an older woman assuming they are equally attractive. I think the younger woman would be at a disadvantage due to the maturity, but that's me.


----------



## hawx20

jld said:


> What made you decide to stay?


At first? My 5 year old daughter. The thought of ripping apart the world she has always known killed me more than anything my wife did. She wouldnt understand and being the father automatically put me on the losing end of custody. The thought of not seeing her grow up everyday killed me.

Had we not had children, we wouldnt be together. So I stayed for my daughter and didnt know how I would ever reconcile with my wife at the time. She has been extremely remorseful and has done everything right so far. Its made R so much easier and the love I have for her slowly but surely coming back.

She lost a great husband who would do everything to make her life easier. She still has a great husband, but now she has one that she will never take for granted. I dont fear losing her. I never will. I already went through the pain of losing her. If she ever decides to cheat or go back to her old ways, I'm gone.


----------



## jld

I am so sorry, hawx. Just so sorry.


----------



## hawx20

jld said:


> I am so sorry, hawx. Just so sorry.


Thanks. All things considered, especially reading some stories on TAM, it could be worse. 

She took her family to the brink of destruction and I hope that "woke her up" to the person she had become. So far, its seems to be the case. 

Obviously I wish it had never happened, but I'm actually much happier now then I was between the the time she had the affair and dday. Shes back to being the woman I fell in love with, married, and lived with for 5 years. Only time will tell if she remains this way but if she doesnt, I wont hesitate to show her the door. 

She used her only second chance. There will not be a third and she knows that.


----------



## Caribbean Man

What is not attractive about these two women?



Halle Berry @ 52 yrs old.
IMO , she's aged pretty good. She got better looking and sexier , after she crossed 40.

Michelle Yeoh @ 51 yrs old.
( Crouching Tiger , Hidden Dragon )

Fine wine.


----------



## familyfirst09

Interesting thread...I am 40 and in sooooooo much better shape than when I was 20..and also smarter and wiser...found this article which is sort of related and it struck a cord with me so thought I would share:

The Actual Difference Between Women Who Are Hot And Who Are Beautiful | Elite Daily


----------



## Sanity

Therealbrighteyes said:


> So I have a question......do you prefer 35+ rather than younger women? All the guys here are saying very positive things but if they were the norm, you wouldn't have a bunch of guys chasing younger women.


I prefer older woman and always have. I remember dating a 25 year old when I was 19. Unfortunately age does not = maturity and I have met younger women with the wisdom of a 75 year old. If I ever get back into the dating scene, age will be a factor but so will maturity. Having said this, I will not date anybody seriously in their 20's. Most folks this age are still figuring thins out. It would take somebody with good upbringing and maturity to even consider this age bracket again. 

In short my age range for dating would be between 30-43.


----------



## Jellybeans

Halle Berry is a goddess.


----------



## Sandfly

Jewish women are attractive, especially in their 30's and 40's. I don't understand the mechanisms involved. 

They tend to be intelligent, good conversationalists and internationalist in their views. They also tend to be crazy, but this is a quality I look for.


----------



## Machiavelli

35, huh? Physique wise, primarily a relatively flat stomach with no evidence of tummy tuck. Typically, if that is in order the rest will be, too. I'm more of a big picture guy, in that I don't care that much about individual body parts as I do about the sum of the parts taken as a whole.

If I were really in the market, I'd be looking for the same thing I was looking for 35 years ago: general attractiveness and playfulness.


----------



## SpinDaddy

Meh, I like me my women like I like me my cars. Classic, tail fins, sexy curves and big V-8s.


----------



## Sandfly

Duguesclin said:


> Correction:
> Je ne savais pas que tu parlais le francais. En fait, tu l'ecris mieux que moi.


Enfin, Je vous vois par ici, Mr. Duguesclin. Soyez le bienvenu! Ca fait tant d'années que je ne le parlais pas, mais je me rappelle assez pour en faire un effort lorsque je passe par Bruxelles ou bien la France en route pour d'autres pays... mais malheureusement, pas autant que je voudrais... si c'était á moi de décider, le francais serait encore la langue utilisée pour se comprendre, et non pas ce mélange 'anglais' sans mélodie, qui se fait passer pour une langue. Mais, cet avis, c'est entre nous deux, ben?


----------



## jld

Mais, comment parles-tu aussi bien que ca? Tu connais le francais mieux que moi, et ca fait vingt ans que je l'apprends. Dis-nous, s'il te plait.


----------



## Sandfly

Thanks  I guess if you start early enough, you remember it more easily.

We're going off thread jld! (my fault!)

So who would you rate as the archetypical post 35 attractive woman?

Let's see a picture of this person...


----------



## I Notice The Details

Speaking of beautiful older women....OMG....look at this:


----------



## NewHubs

Christie Brinkley looks AMAZING but the mug shot of Justin Bieber on the cover just killed it for me! What was People thinking??!!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## NextTimeAround

familyfirst09 said:


> Interesting thread...I am 40 and in sooooooo much better shape than when I was 20..and also smarter and wiser...found this article which is sort of related and it struck a cord with me so thought I would share:
> 
> The Actual Difference Between Women Who Are Hot And Who Are Beautiful | Elite Daily


oh dear, another one of those articles written by a woman telling us what SHE THINKS men want.


----------



## Caribbean Man

NextTimeAround said:


> oh dear, another one of those articles written by a woman telling us what SHE THINKS men want.


Lol!

I read the entire article and the same thing crossed my mind!


----------



## Caribbean Man

I Notice The Details said:


> Speaking of beautiful older women....OMG....look at this:


Is that woman in the pic really 60 yrs old?

I have a really close female friend who's 55 yrs old.
She has three daughters. The middle daughter is about 22 yrs old.
They both actually wear each other's fitted jeans and tops.
They wear the same size dresses too.


----------



## JustRon

Dana Delany, 57 and going strong. China Beach was my awakening....


----------



## Machiavelli

NextTimeAround said:


> oh dear, another one of those articles written by a woman telling us what SHE THINKS men want.


More like what men SHOULd be wanting. No doubt, she fits the bill.


----------



## norajane

Caribbean Man said:


> Is that woman in the pic really 60 yrs old?


60, with a lot of photoshop.


----------



## Sandfly

NextTimeAround said:


> oh dear, another one of those articles written by a woman telling us what SHE THINKS men want.


I read yon article...

She recycled the stale old papist idea of women as either Wh*re or Angel..., 

"Hot is devious; beautiful is innocent.
Hot is sultry; beautiful is wholesome."
etc.

I liked this response in the comments:

-Rebecca Law · Director at Nourish Co.- Says:

"Sounds to me like the writer could consider broadening her horizons. If that's the calibre of men she knows or spends time with it's equally a reflection on her. Very few men I know fit into that stereotype because I choose not to spend time around narcissistic, superficial or artificial individuals."


----------



## uhaul4mybaggage

P-P-P-P-please.
I have seen so much before/after photo retouching on celeb photos. I agree Halle et al are beautiful, but when you have real people with real insecurities about their age and how it is affecting their DOW JONES in dating circles, and then you throw up a very likely airbrushed and photoshopped pic of a celeb who has very likely had a zillion dollars worth of plastic surgery BEFORE the photo shop... well, just stick a fork in me. I'm done.

Men and women both age. Men do it "gracefully" (meaning, women seem to appreciate the changes that nature throws at men.) Women do it... Jeez. I was on a particularly harsh site ... 

Dating Market Value Test For Women | Chateau Heartiste

answered some questions related to my dateability. Turns out, even though I think I'm pretty shagarific, I should be looking at the Hank Hills as prime catch and his beer bellied buddy Bill as basically my average. According to them, if I dare to turn 49, my score automatically goes to "Why are you still alive?" FT. 

Turned over to the guy quiz, and guess what? Much kinder scale. 
It's like me posting a Johnny Depp photo of him in his 20's and saying, yeah, see? Older guys can rock. GIVE. ME. A. BREAK. please?


----------



## Therealbrighteyes

uhaul4mybaggage said:


> P-P-P-P-please.
> I have seen so much before/after photo retouching on celeb photos. I agree Halle et al are beautiful, but when you have real people with real insecurities about their age and how it is affecting their DOW JONES in dating circles, and then you throw up a very likely airbrushed and photoshopped pic of a celeb who has very likely had a zillion dollars worth of plastic surgery BEFORE the photo shop... well, just stick a fork in me. I'm done.
> 
> Men and women both age. Men do it "gracefully" (meaning, women seem to appreciate the changes that nature throws at men.) Women do it... Jeez. I was on a particularly harsh site ...
> 
> Dating Market Value Test For Women | Chateau Heartiste
> 
> answered some questions related to my dateability. Turns out, even though I think I'm pretty shagarific, I should be looking at the Hank Hills as prime catch and his beer bellied buddy Bill as basically my average. According to them, if I dare to turn 49, my score automatically goes to "Why are you still alive?" FT.
> 
> Turned over to the guy quiz, and guess what? Much kinder scale.
> It's like me posting a Johnny Depp photo of him in his 20's and saying, yeah, see? Older guys can rock. GIVE. ME. A. BREAK. please?



Just so you know, the guy who runs the website you mentioned is Daryush Valizadeh, better known as Roosh V or Chateau Heartiste. He wrote self published books about how to rape your way through foreign countries. He also literally moved out of his fathers basement at the age of 29. He attracts the scourge of the Earth and has no shortage of them. 

I thought you should know how "hot" he is so here is a link to his picture. I'll leave you to your laughter. 

http://www.datingskillsreview.com/images/stories/jreviews/2690_rooshv1_1313777235.jpg


----------



## familyfirst09

Caribbean Man said:


> Lol!
> 
> I read the entire article and the same thing crossed my mind!


Lol, I thought it was sweet!!! I'd take being called beautiful over hot any day (then again I am a woman) 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## uhaul4mybaggage

Therealbrighteyes said:


> Just so you know, the guy who runs the website you mentioned is Daryush Valizadeh, better known as Roosh V or Chateau Heartiste. He wrote self published books about how to rape your way through foreign countries. He also literally moved out of his fathers basement at the age of 29. He attracts the scourge of the Earth and has no shortage of them.
> 
> I thought you should know how "hot" he is so here is a link to his picture. I'll leave you to your laughter.
> 
> http://www.datingskillsreview.com/images/stories/jreviews/2690_rooshv1_1313777235.jpg


Thanks, Bright Eyes, that makes me feel much better. I've always been pretty gullible, things like this make my skin crawl.


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## Sandfly

Mmmm. Of course, if you look at the picture, you know who he thinks he is, who he is emulating with the

Long hair
Bushy Beard
and Hypnotistical stare-eyes technique?

I wish the word 'hot' would drop out of American vocabulary. It's so stupid. As UH4MB points out, the correct term is shagarific or "well-fit" or "proper tidy".


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## Faithful Wife

You know...I'm not all flag-waving Yankee Doodle singing or anything but...really sandfly? There are a lot dumber things Americans do you could pick on us for.

If someone doesn't understand the subtle nuance of how we mean "hot" when we say it, then don't listen to us. Very easy.

Buster Poindexter - Hot Hot Hot - YouTube


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## Therealbrighteyes

Best compliment I ever received was when a guy I was dating said I looked scandalous. "Proper tidy" is what I do every Sunday morning with a can of Pledge.


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## Kaboom

Without reading any replies yet, my first thought is:



> What makes a 35+ woman attractive to you?


A: An 18 year old sister!


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## Therealbrighteyes

kaboom said:


> without reading any replies yet, my first thought is:
> 
> 
> 
> A: An 18 year old sister!


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## Caribbean Man

Sandfly said:


> Enfin, Je vous vois par ici, Mr. Duguesclin. Soyez le bienvenu! Ca fait tant d'années que je ne le parlais pas, mais je me rappelle assez pour en faire un effort lorsque je passe par Bruxelles ou bien la France en route pour d'autres pays... mais malheureusement, pas autant que je voudrais... *si c'était á moi de décider, le francais serait encore la langue utilisée pour se comprendre, et non pas ce mélange 'anglais' sans mélodie, qui se fait passer pour une langue. Mais, cet avis, c'est entre nous deux,* ben?


Huh?
_
J'ai pensé que vous aimiez anglais_?

Never mind,

_" Amour, toux et fumée En ne secret sont demeurée, et,tout arrive en France !"_

At least that's what I've been told.
[lol, hope I got that right!]


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## Pictureless

Q: What makes a 35+ woman attractive to you?

A: First I notice what she looks like, but what she has to say is way more important.


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## familyfirst09

Pictureless said:


> Q: What makes a 35+ woman attractive to you?
> 
> A: First I notice what she looks like, but what she has to say is way more important.



The same can be said for a man...a man can be "hot", "beautiful", whatever but if he opens his mouth and sh*t comes out, his "hotness level" decreses substantially...
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## I Notice The Details

familyfirst09 said:


> The same can be said for a man...a man can be "hot", "beautiful", whatever but if he opens his mouth and sh*t comes out, his "hotness level" decreses substantially...
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Very true!


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## lovelifeandwanttoenjoyit

that is younger than me!!!! lol

Seriously I always liked older women, usually they know what they want and they share the experience........

I like a woman that is secure of her self and knows what she wants and is not afraid of showing it.


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## sidney2718

Kaboom said:


> Without reading any replies yet, my first thought is:
> 
> 
> 
> A: An 18 year old sister!


And for me it would be her youth. Seriously.


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## Jellybeans

Therealbrighteyes said:


> View attachment 17017


I've always had a crush on Animal. Don't laugh.


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## Machiavelli

Pictureless said:


> Q: What makes a 35+ woman attractive to you?
> 
> A: First I notice what she looks like, but what she has to say is way more important.


Yeah, but if she's not good looking, you never hear what she has to say. And what she says decreases in importance, the hotter she is. Of course, that's only true until you enter the refractory period.


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## I Notice The Details

Machiavelli said:


> Yeah, but if she's not good looking, you never hear what she has to say. And what she says decreases in importance, the hotter she is. Of course, that's only true until you enter the refractory period.


:rofl: Your sense of humor is exactly like my brother's....:rofl:


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## NextTimeAround

Machiavelli said:


> Yeah, but if she's not good looking, you never hear what she has to say. And what she says decreases in importance, the hotter she is. Of course, that's only true until you enter the refractory period.


My fiance and I were just talking about this. I remarked how I noticed that when a guy starts dating me, he's willing to listen to everything and comment thoughtfully. After awhile, he'll become dismissive to the point where I get mad and well, the relationship falls apart.

I now accept that men are wired differently and no amount of women's lib is going to change some things.


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## ocotillo

TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore said:


> This is somewhat of a stolen thread topic concept from *southbound*. What makes a 35+ woman attractive to you guys?


Being sixty?

--Sorry, couldn't resist. :rofl:


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## Betrayedone

jld said:


> Mais, comment parles-tu aussi bien que ca? Tu connais le francais mieux que moi, et ca fait vingt ans que je l'apprends. Dis-nous, s'il te plait.


All right you two........get a room!


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## jld

Sorry, betrayed. I like to speak Spanish or French whenever I can. But I will stick to English!


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