# All the credit cards are hers, how responsible am I?



## Runsalone (Dec 27, 2008)

Hey all, I wonder if somebody can help me with something.

My wife of almost 9 years and I are deciding to call it quits. We have no shared ownership of anything, no house no car, the child is my stepchild.

The credit cards we deal with are all in her name, about half of the debt is debt she had on them from before she knew me. I have tried over and over again to get her not to use credit cards throughout our marriage but to no avail.

I am a cardholder on one but it is not in my name . I have NO credit cards in my name, or joint credit cards between us.

My question is what is my level of LEGAL responsibility to pay her credit cards. Im planning to help her with them but I dont want to be legally responsible for anything that isnt rightly mine. Especially given that Ive begged her every step of the way not to use them. 


Thanks for any help!!


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## justean (May 28, 2008)

in your heart you know what you have bought and not bought.
if your going your own ways , can she atleast be logical.
my personal opinion only but whatever is my debt is my debt its not my H's.
but then im not a taker.
i think if a card is in her name , like most cards, its that persons responsibilty not yours.


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## Blonddeee (Dec 17, 2008)

I just filed last Monday so i don't know how all this will work out, but my lawyer said that most of the debt incured would be split- since we bouhgt him a big screen tv... if he keeps it, he'll keep the debt for that... so i guess there's a couple ways of spliting it. If you make similar salarys it should be more fair...


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## TNgirl232 (Oct 5, 2008)

When I got divorced the lawyer said "technically" anything household related (meaning we both used it - so an appliance or furniture or a vacation) those should be split 50/50. But my ex was willing to take it all so there was no debate. So if she wants to push it, then you may have to do an accounting of anything that could be seen as community property and cover half of that.


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## Runsalone (Dec 27, 2008)

TNgirl232 said:


> When I got divorced the lawyer said "technically" anything household related (meaning we both used it - so an appliance or furniture or a vacation) those should be split 50/50. But my ex was willing to take it all so there was no debate. So if she wants to push it, then you may have to do an accounting of anything that could be seen as community property and cover half of that.




There literaly isnt any. The furnishings are all hers from before. We own seperate vehicles. No house no nothing that isnt obvious and decided about whos is whats.

Shes taking everything she brought into the thing and Im taking the guy stuff that she couldnt possibly be interested in. Which equivocates to about $400 in backpacking gear.


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

Runsalone said:


> Which equivocates to about $400 in backpacking gear.


How appropriate


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## Runsalone (Dec 27, 2008)

MarkTwain said:


> How appropriate


Maybe time to dust that stuff off eh?


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## Runsalone (Dec 27, 2008)

Runsalone said:


> Maybe time to dust that stuff off eh?



So I did.


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## marina72 (Dec 29, 2008)

Well, all that should be ironed out in the divorce agreement. And actually you two can do it any way you want, as long as it's acceptable to you both, and you both formally agree, then the judge will most likely grant the divorce and make the decree.

Talk to your lawyer. but in the strictest sense, I think if all those cards are in her name, then technically, they are her debt.

However, it could be argued in a court of law, that's if the divorce is contested in any way, that you both incurred the debt, just by living life in general.

I mean, I have no credit cards, had mine all payed off when I met my current hubby, so he has two cards, in his name, that he had long ago. But, since we've been together, we've most certainly used those, to support our family. So, I would certainly , not that we are ever going to divorce, but if we did, I'd be willing to take half the debt, since the cards were used for him/me/kids... while we were together.

But, you really just have to sit down with an attorney and decide what works best for both of you.


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## Runsalone (Dec 27, 2008)

marina72 said:


> I mean, I have no credit cards, had mine all payed off when I met my current hubby, so he has two cards, in his name, that he had long ago. But, since we've been together, we've most certainly used those, to support our family. So, I would certainly , not that we are ever going to divorce, but if we did, I'd be willing to take half the debt, since the cards were used for him/me/kids... while we were together.
> 
> But, you really just have to sit down with an attorney and decide what works best for both of you.


 Cant afford an attorney I agreed to take half of everything owed on them and have been paying by covering the bills she cant seem to pay. As soon as we all are on our feet again Ill be paying her personally towards half of it.

That seemed fair to me even though I didnt do much of the running up of the bill, I dont want to just send her off with all the debt.

But I dont want some legal b.s. to tell me what ive already agreed to do, and have been doing. But I dont think shell go that route. Ive been a man of my word the entire time shes known me. I always do what I say Im gonna do.

I really just want this to be done with so I can stop worrying about my future. I wish they could just flip a switch and say "you not married anymore" and not have to go through all the motions. Thats all we need anyway, we dont own diddlysquat, and Ive already been helping her with the debt even though its about 90% not mine.

Our situation just has nothing for us to squabble over, Ive only got about 4K left and I should be debt free. Im worring about her changing her mind or her parents or friends talking her into screwing me over. 

I really dont think she would do that but weirder things have happened.


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

well, it depends on what state you live in, since you were married for 9 years, basically everything is 50/50 doesn't matter whose name is on it, or who owned it prior to marriage.

it becomes "communial" property

Try to work things out first and see what you can negotiate.


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