# finally had the courage to do it.



## xxPsychoKatxx (Dec 6, 2011)

my husband has been seeing a married women with 3 kids, she has told him lie after lie and that her and her husband arent together but i found out recently they atill are so i messaged him letting him know everything thats his wife has been doing with my husband and well he hast read it yet but when he does im pretty sure it wont be so pretty.

did i do tight or wrong..

help?


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Does your husband know that you know about his affair?

Did you do the right thing? I think you did. I just hope he's not a violent man.


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## tacoma (May 1, 2011)

You did the best thing that could be done.

You threw a wrench in the affair from the OW`s side.

This has one of two general outcomes..

The OW`s husband wants to save his marriage and puts his wife on lock down so she cannot continue her affair with your husband.
It also often destroys the fantasy your husband has built around her.

The OW`s husband kicks her out and she`s readily available to engage in her affair with your husband into overdrive.

Either way it applies pressure to one or both of them that could only be beneficial to you.

How did you find out?
How long has it been going on?
Have you confronted your husband?


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

100% right thing.

The OWH husband has a right to knw his wife is messing around.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## xxPsychoKatxx (Dec 6, 2011)

i found out because my husband and i got separated then i saw he had been talking to her through face book and then he finally came clean telling me they were together and all that jazz but im pretty sure her husband was unaware of this because shes been feeding my husband lies saying theyre separated but she goes and comments his pic on face book saying she wished she was there to see it with him before she goes to spend time with my husband so im sure he is unaware but i certainly am no but i do think he had the right to know that the women hes working his ass off to support is haveing an affair with my husband that im separated from so its not much as an affair in my perspective but it is in the OW husbands perspective.


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## GoingNowhere (Nov 13, 2011)

I think you did. But I hope your words in the message were sensitive, and not full of anger.

I called one of my WH's AP's (I can't say OW because..... Well it was an IT... ) that I found contact information for.. I didn't get a call back from them, but their boyfriend.

Immediately, my tone changed and I asked him if he was busy. If he was working. He said he was off that day. I asked him to sit and talk with me a while.. said that what I had to tell him wouldn't be easy to hear.

I told him that his "girl"friend and my husband had a night together. He started crying.. It was so hard to take. He said "she" had done this before but he thought "she" was done with cheating. He then asked me about my ordeal - found out we were married, and have a child. He started apologizing for his "girl"friend's mistakes.... said he couldn't believe the damage "she" must have caused....

We actually talked for upwards of two hours... I almost didn't want to get off the phone with him.... in that short time, he became my friend.


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## Dexter Morgan (Dec 8, 2011)

xxPsychoKatxx said:


> my husband has been seeing a married women with 3 kids, she has told him lie after lie and that her and her husband arent together but i found out recently they atill are so i messaged him letting him know everything thats his wife has been doing with my husband and well he hast read it yet but when he does im pretty sure it wont be so pretty.
> 
> did i do tight or wrong..


Outing cheaters is ALWAYS the right thing to do. People shouldn't have to sit at home not knowing what POS they are married to.


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## bryanp (Aug 25, 2011)

You did absolutely the correct thing. Well done!


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## xxPsychoKatxx (Dec 6, 2011)

thanks everyone, i never got a response but i just hope he reads it and maybe does something to fix it for himself.


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## xxPsychoKatxx (Dec 6, 2011)

so i finally got a response from the OW husband and well we exchanged numbers so we can talk through text and ive told him everything i know and the poor guy was in the dark, he told me he was glad i contacted him.

idk what this is gunna do but im just glad he now knows also.


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## HerToo (Oct 3, 2011)

I hope you encouraged him to gather evidence of his own before he talks to his W. 

And to also not be violent in any way. 

You did good. 

I wish your marriage and his the best chance for recovery.


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## xxPsychoKatxx (Dec 6, 2011)

HerToo said:


> I hope you encouraged him to gather evidence of his own before he talks to his W.
> 
> And to also not be violent in any way.
> 
> ...


thanks and yeah but my husband texted me saying thank you for telling her that me and him had sex 2 weeks ago and that he hates me and cant wait till i leave so he doesnt have to see my ugly face again.
lol loser.
my marriage is over for good on his end, it sucks but oh well at least this affair has been exposed.


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## Wanabeelee (Sep 6, 2011)

xxPsychoKatxx said:


> thanks and yeah but my husband texted me saying thank you for telling her that me and him had sex 2 weeks ago and that he hates me and cant wait till i leave so he doesnt have to see my ugly face again.
> lol loser.
> my marriage is over for good on his end, it sucks but oh well at least this affair has been exposed.


Gos to show he was still 100% with the other woman though. You did the right thing. Now it's time to tell everyone he knows as well. cheaterville.com is a good place to start.


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

When the OW throws him underthe bus he will be back trying to sweet talk you,
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## xxPsychoKatxx (Dec 6, 2011)

well seems like everything i did turned into a big mess then it became nothing again lol, the OW got my number and started to try and talk to me then it went from that to poop talking then after i put in my last word she never texted me back then she texted me like at almost 1 in the morning apologizing for everything she said to me and that she knows that she was wrong and all this stuff lol then my husband found out that her husband was planning to meet him and to tell him that shes staying with him and that shes not going to be with my husband lol and today im leaving back to my parents house and i let my husband know so that he could say bye to our son before we left, he came by and played with him a bit then told him bye and then he left, i wasnt expecting any kind of apology from him at all but then i got a text from him saying he was sorry for all the **** he put me through these past 4 years and that he was going to leave the OW alone because he was tired of all the bull**** and that he was gunna stick to his plan and be alone and that he hopes to hear from me again one day.
i was shocked at the text and i just said that i forgive him and goodbye just for my own satisfaction as to show that i have no ill feelings about this anymore.
i still got what i wanted in the end and that was for him to not be with the OW lol and well looks like my plan worked out for me in the end.

im cutting my husband out of my life to give me time to heal from this whole ordeal and im sure once i feel better about talking to him i will contact him but for now, im not going to let him know a thing about me.

my inlaws will pick up our son from me and i still will have contact with them but i just wont have contact with my husband.
so the whole thing with the child situation is taken care of also.
his parents dont want to see me go but they feel its the right thing for me to do so i can heal and i can start my life up without him.

ugh wish me luck everyone!


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## Eli-Zor (Nov 14, 2010)

Wish you luck , youve chosen a course that is best for you. Send the OW's husband a message advising him that after an affair is busted waywards tend to go underground.

Your going to be in a good place , run what is called a Plan B on your husband . Find an intermediary to filter your husbands calls , text messages and emails. Go dark on him , the less direct contact you have the better it is for you.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## xxPsychoKatxx (Dec 6, 2011)

Eli-Zor said:


> Wish you luck , youve chosen a course that is best for you. Send the OW's husband a message advising him that after an affair is busted waywards tend to go underground.
> 
> Your going to be in a good place , run what is called a Plan B on your husband . Find an intermediary to filter your husbands calls , text messages and emails. Go dark on him , the less direct contact you have the better it is for you.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


yeah, the OW said she wanted to be friends with me and i cut her off right there, i dont wanna be friends with a person who caused so much pain in my life, my husband knows i wont be in contact with him because i told him and he got upset about it and i asked him after the apology if he still wanted to hear from me and he said yes but hes not going to and i will be getting my number changed for those purposes on him texting or calling.

im done with this and i know im doing the right thing even tho im a little hesitant.

thank you for the luck!


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## lou (Apr 22, 2011)

xxPsychoKatxx said:


> yeah, the OW said she wanted to be friends with me and i cut her off right there, i dont wanna be friends with a person who caused so much pain in my life,!


This happened with my STBX's OW too. I do not understand the mind frame of these women! Why in god's hell would I ever want to be friends with you!?


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## xxPsychoKatxx (Dec 6, 2011)

lou said:


> This happened with my STBX's OW too. I do not understand the mind frame of these women! Why in god's hell would I ever want to be friends with you!?


right! its like seriously you thimk were gunna be friends after all the pain you put me through? i kept sticking to the truth with her and no more texts from her or her husband lol i guess after my stbxh stopped talking to her lol theres nothing like the wrath of a women scorned lol!


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## calif_hope (Feb 25, 2011)

Is your husband going to see his child, does he want to? Is he going to pay you child support, help with bills? You know it's very possible, after he gets his head out of his ass (the fog) he will pursue visitation thru the courts. You need to be ready for that and have contingency plans ready (ie. amount of visitation, overnight or not, exchange of child, rules about introducing child to other women (never).....

Take care of yourself!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## xxPsychoKatxx (Dec 6, 2011)

calif_hope said:


> Is your husband going to see his child, does he want to? Is he going to pay you child support, help with bills? You know it's very possible, after he gets his head out of his ass (the fog) he will pursue visitation thru the courts. You need to be ready for that and have contingency plans ready (ie. amount of visitation, overnight or not, exchange of child, rules about introducing child to other women (never).....
> 
> Take care of yourself!
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


actually he is going to see his dad and his family this weekend, hes going for christmas.
there is no way i would ever keep my son from his father or his grandma, he has no interest in seeing him cause if he did the whole time we were in his town he wouldnt have chosen to see that OW over him and i have filed for child support already im just waiting for a letter telling the court date and im ready for whatever he thinks he can do, we've been through this before and this time im not letting him cancel the divorce and im not going to cancel the child support.
he chose this, not us.


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## xxPsychoKatxx (Dec 6, 2011)

so like 2 days ago i got a text from the OW saying "hes all your" the nerve of her man i just blew it off and laughed because it doesnt matter if hes mine or not at least not right now lol i just didnt want him to be with that flusie lol! anyways merry christmas lol late i know!


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

xxPsychoKatxx said:


> so like 2 days ago i got a text from the OW saying "hes all your" the nerve of her man i just blew it off and laughed because it doesnt matter if hes mine or not at least not right now lol i just didnt want him to be with that flusie lol! anyways merry christmas lol late i know!


Why not text her back that you don't want him.. she can have him.


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## xxPsychoKatxx (Dec 6, 2011)

Eh I didn't even wanna bother with it anymore all I told her was merry Christmas lol I think it prolly ticked her off, she gets my number tried to be cool with me then started running her mouth then she apologizes and says she wants to be friends and because I ignored her she prolly pooped her pants lol some people just crave attention or something I think she thought she was going to get a reaction out of me or something but since I didn't react the way
She wanted she was prolly all steamed haha my stbxh wants nothing to do with her now especially while she was telling me off she brought our son into it, eh i don't care haven't talked to him in days and I'm happy bout that. 
Best thing for me to do is my own thing like I'm doing now but I will still keep you all updated with anymore news haha!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## calif_hope (Feb 25, 2011)

"You don't want him"......... I like that. Maybe "There is a no return policy in force".........it might be too easy to play mind games with this stupid OW that it takes the satisfaction out of the equasion!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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