# Need your suggestions



## Vinni (Dec 7, 2021)

I have been married for 6 years, however we have not had sex since. I have waited patiently when he was having financial issues for 2years and he said he was under stress. I have waited when after that everyday he said we will do it tomorrow, it's been almost 6 years now. We hardly ever kiss or hug or cuddle, I have been asking him that I want a kid and 2 years have passed since. He is just not available for me emotionally and physically. I have had lots of conversations, I have given him ultimatums of leaving but he never takes it seriously. Now I am on a stage where I don't want to get involved physically with him. My heart has shut on him. 
I am thinking of leaving seriously but I am scared of the future


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

I see that you’re in India. Was this an arranged marriage?


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## Vinni (Dec 7, 2021)

Andy1001 said:


> I see that you’re in India. Was this an arranged marriage?


My sister and friends had got married and I was really alone after a bad breakup. During that time I met him on a matrimonial site and found him to be really sweet. So we decided to get married


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

Vinni said:


> My sister and friends had got married and I was really alone after a bad breakup. During that time I met him on a matrimonial site and found him to be really sweet. So we decided to get married


So you got married because your friends were getting married. And to someone who you knew nothing about except he was “sweet”.
A lot of gay men are sweet.
You should ask for a refund and a divorce.


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## Divorcing1 (May 21, 2019)

Leave. Return home. File for divorce. if he comes to his senses in the meantime, chase you, put you high up as a prize as he should, regret his actions and commit to you then maybe you could consider withdrawling the divorce. what you describe is not a marriage.


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## Galabar01 (Mar 20, 2019)

Was there any sexual interaction before the marriage?


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

Vinni said:


> My sister and friends had got married and I was really alone after a bad breakup. During that time I met him on a matrimonial site and found him to be really sweet. So we decided to get married


You married the wrong guy. I don't see why you should stay. You're not getting anything out of this on any level. Pretty sure you could find a better guy or at least a better match. Just be confident and don't be afraid of leaving. He's probably living whatever life he wants to live when he's not with you and may only be staying with you for appearances. Don't waste your life like this. Even if you agreed to get you pregnant, I just bet you'd be on your own after that and it wouldn't be like a happy family or one where you had a real partner helping with the child.


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## kclark30 (Nov 6, 2021)

You sound a lot like me. You need to make a plan and figure out how to leave your marriage. I was married for 6 years and we hardly had sex, he just didn’t want to. I was the best wife I could be and did everything I could to try and make it work. The only problem was that he wasn’t doing anything for me. I asked several times, we did therapy, I’d get so angry at him and it wasn’t good for me. I care for him as a person and a friend, but nothing more. I saved as much money as I could and made a plan to leave. It wasn’t easy, but it makes it less scary. Your future is waiting for you.


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## jonty30 (Oct 23, 2021)

Vinni said:


> I have been married for 6 years, however we have not had sex since. I have waited patiently when he was having financial issues for 2years and he said he was under stress. I have waited when after that everyday he said we will do it tomorrow, it's been almost 6 years now. We hardly ever kiss or hug or cuddle, I have been asking him that I want a kid and 2 years have passed since. He is just not available for me emotionally and physically. I have had lots of conversations, I have given him ultimatums of leaving but he never takes it seriously. Now I am on a stage where I don't want to get involved physically with him. My heart has shut on him.
> I am thinking of leaving seriously but I am scared of the future


If he will not be your husband, you're going to have prepare for a life of your own.
I'm sorry for this.

Get a marketable skill that will allow you to earn an income and prep for independence.


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