# In need of Advice



## JakeCee23 (Jun 28, 2008)

I am 23 year old college student, last night I proposed to my girlfriend of 5 months. In context we both have agreed to not actually "tie the knot" so to speak until we both graduate with our advanced degrees which will take 2 more years. My question(s) for you guys out there is: Time frame? I feel comfortable about the situation now but, I understand how life changes people. Next fall she will graduate with her bachelor's and is contemplating grad school out of state, while I finish my dual degree. My friends think Im crazy and we are telling her parents tomorrow. I wonder if our action to earnest, and I don't want her to give-up on a very promising career on my account. My question finally; is there anyone out there that married in their twenties thats been through long distance relationships, and found ways to make it work? I really truly love this person but I am also aware of the divorce rate in this country, and the picture that has been painted of marriage in general. I don't pretend to act as though I'm not concerned or even fearful. Yet I also feel we deserve each other and in that regard I want to give our relationship my best. So, if there is anyone that has had a similar circumstance or perhaps the wisdom of experience, frank well-intentioned advice is needed. Thank you.


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## justean (May 28, 2008)

first time i married was at the age of 21, ok it was my worst mistake, been together since we were 16. thought we were doing the next best thing in life. but we both had so much going on in out lives. 
i was training to be a nurse, he was training to be a manager. but it wasnt about our careers, we were just the wrong couple.
ok i learnt alot. but i wasnt really in love with him. 
he changed as soon as we got married, but when i actually looked back b 4 we married he was still cruel to me, but when married that got worse.
i cant take it back only learn. but the marriage only lasted 15 months.
second time i married was at 27. to me it was a better age, training and career were established. i felt i had better prospects and i knew who i was.


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## draconis (Oct 3, 2007)

During the next few years you will grow a great amount. Some people grow together while others apart. Can it work, sure. But you have to have faith and trust in her to let her be free from you and can not interfere with her plans. I had a long distance relationship with my wife and we have been married for ten years now.

Ask yourself why you proposed to her, was it because you know you two will end up together or are you afraid of losing her?

draconis


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## TheLuckiest08 (Jun 2, 2008)

If you really know that she's the one for you but you can't get married for a few years, why not just wait to be engaged? What's the rush?? Five months is not very long to know each other before making such a big commitment.


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## Triton (Jul 8, 2008)

Dude , the first part-"I'm 23 ". Don't even think about getting married.


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