# My husband will go down on other woman but not on me



## Cotton_Candy_&_Bubblegum (Jul 7, 2011)

My husband and I have had a great relationship up until about 2 months ago. He is caring, helps with the children, cooks dinners, provides well for his family etc, etc. We are a young couple and decided to have a 3-some with an acquaintance which went well with no issues, we actually where closer afterwards. We didn't expect the same scenario to happen so soon after but about 4 months later it happened again with a mutual female friend, now before any of these two events occurred we discussed rules, that we use protection, not to much intimacy with the third party and no oral on the other girl because he has always told me he didn't like it and didn't do it to me so I didn't think it was fair if she got that special treatment. 

In both situations he ate them out especially with the second encounter he was asking her a lot to eat her out. I asked him later why he doesn't eat me out but will eat her out and he said I taste weird. I always thought I was clean I take showers daily and I have never heard a comment from previous relationships about this. I asked him why he did it and that I told him not to, his reply was that he didn't hear me say that. and then I made him very aware that I was hurt and we are never going to have any other sexual encounters with another girl again. We agreed because we felt it wasn't healthy for our relationship and from what I saw he wanted to work on it I read to put honey on my special area to make it taste better. So one night I made it special and took a shower, lit candles, put some loungerie on and got some honey that night went well it seemed to help a lot the next week we where at the farmers market and he even bought me some honey so I was proud he was trying.

Then a week after going to the market I decided to take a shower and use some honey he got mad at me and said he wasn't going to to it and that he didn't like it... he claimed up again....... Since then I have not gone down on him and we rarely have sex... we used to have sex 4-5 times a week at least now its about 1 time every two weeks. 

It has been this way now for about a month and a half we finally made our first apt to a marriage counselor but It seems like until then which it is 15 days away it just keeps getting worse and worse. I am not even turned on by the thought of sex with him anymore because he thinks my vagina is gross... he also lied to me about not liking it for years and It pisses me off that he would do it to this other woman who gets around the block but not to me, his wife. I also have been fantasizing about maybe meeting up with another person... I know I never will but it bothers me that I am fantasizing about someone else....

Is there any one going through this same situation or if you where what would you do... I just want my marriage to be like it was, happy, healthy, and loving.


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## Undertheradar (May 11, 2011)

Cotton_Candy_&_Bubblegum said:


> My husband and I have had a great relationship up until about 2 months ago. He is caring, helps with the children, cooks dinners, provides well for his family etc, etc. We are a young couple and decided to have a 3-some with an acquaintance which went well with no issues, we actually where closer afterwards. We didn't expect the same scenario to happen so soon after but about 4 months later it happened again with a mutual female friend, now before any of these two events occurred we discussed rules, that we use protection, not to much intimacy with the third party and no oral on the other girl because he has always told me he didn't like it and didn't do it to me so I didn't think it was fair if she got that special treatment.
> 
> In both situations he ate them out especially with the second encounter he was asking her a lot to eat her out. I asked him later why he doesn't eat me out but will eat her out and he said *I taste weird*. I always thought I was clean I take showers daily and I have never heard a comment from previous relationships about this. I asked him why he did it and that I told him not to, his reply was that he didn't hear me say that. and then I made him very aware that I was hurt and we are never going to have any other sexual encounters with another girl again. We agreed because we felt it wasn't healthy for our relationship and from what I saw he wanted to work on it I read to put honey on my special area to make it taste better. So one night I made it special and took a shower, lit candles, put some loungerie on and got some honey that night went well it seemed to help a lot the next week we where at the farmers market and he even bought me some honey so I was proud he was trying.
> 
> ...


I think he answered your question. :scratchhead:


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

If he broke the agreement regarding the arrangement it doesn't matter if he has a reason. It's still breaking an agreement. 

THAT is the issue. 
The break of trust.

So, suggest a threesome with a guy, with the agreement that the invitee goes down on you. I wonder how your H would like that arrangement. 

It doesn't sound like a sex issue at all. It sounds like your H is being a jerk. An agreement is an agreement.


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## Cotton_Candy_&_Bubblegum (Jul 7, 2011)

The thing with that is I don't necessarily like choking on his **** either but I do it any ways because I love him and want him to be happy.

It just frustrates me that this situation is going down hill so quick.

I feel like he could do it once in a while to please his wife. I go the extra mile to help by taking a shower right beforehand and putting honey on the spot. Am I wrong for thinking that he should do it once in a while to make me happy since I do things that I don't like just to make him happy. Like waking up at 5:AM just to make him fresh breakfast and lunch.

I just don't feel like I should be deprived of it for my whole life. 




Also we both mutually agreed to never do it again...

I mentioned that with another man and he said he would punch him out... I told him I didn't want to anyways because I am his woman and I don't even want to be with another man.. but then I mentioned that I love kissing and maybe I should be able to kiss two guys because I actually do miss that... obviously it wasn't a constructive situation and we fought about it.


All I really want his for him to maybe try eating me out a little more make me feel that my vagina isn't gross because it isn't (My past boyfriends had no problem with it) And I am willing to accommodate him and do what he needs in being able to do that (like put honey on it)


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## Cotton_Candy_&_Bubblegum (Jul 7, 2011)

WhiteRabbit said:


> you shouldn't be deprived of it and that's why you guys are going to counseling to figure it out.
> i dunno, maybe you should stop giving him oral and tell him he smells funny or tastes funny. that's kind of game playing but it might give him a taste of his own medicine.


I did that... well I stopped going out of my way to give him oral because he is getting lazy and wont go out of his way for me. I didn't want to say anything hurtful... because words last. 

But I think that is why we are not having intercourse anymore because I am not giving oral all the time and he hasn't asked either he just goes on with his day like everything is fine and dandy


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

Ugh.
My perception is currently warped due to my own issues but it sounds like he is using withholding as a weapon, also that he has done it to someone else right in front of you, after saying he would not. It's just wrong. You are right, this is a double standard. I wonder if he is having his cake and licking the icing somewhere else. I mean, really, it does not sound like he's on your side at all. Any man can wash the dishes. Mine made a point of it and would tell EVERYONE how he washed the dishes. He hated the new dishwasher in the new house. Even after I pointed out it is cheaper than hand-washing because less use of hot water he insisted on washing the dishes. He stole a whole jug of dishwashing fluid from his work and brought it home before he left and said it would still be there because I wouldn't use it I would use the dishwasher, like it was somehow pathetic to not hand wash dishes...ignoring the fact I am allergic to what he stole to bring home. Anyway, he wanted to point out that he must care about me deeply, because he did the DISHES. Once in a while he would make the bed, meaning fold the sheet up and throw a cover on it. He also paid bills on time. And bbq'd and cooked (but usually when it pleased him, otherwise he would offer to get take out, likely so he could take his cell and go make calls to his posse of women).

If your H's actions in the sack are not lining up with how he is portrayed in your life, pay attention. Sex is supposed to be FUN and you are supposed to be able to ENJOY IT. Not wonder if you are going to. While jumping through hoops and being humiliated in the process. My big mistake was watching a sex instruction video from the Sinclair Institute in order to figure out why I was having trouble orgasmiing (well, after I found out my H was cheating and lying...it did take that)....hmmm the video I selected at the recommendation of my case manager was one that had married couples. What I saw was not so technically adept perhaps as my husband's repertoire in terms of showcasing, but it was way far advanced in terms of mutual pleasure and exploration, and well, the love showed. I commented to the case manager that after 20 minutes of watching, I would want to go to sleep because it was ummmmm so pleasant and dreamy. Not like sex with my H which was all about manipulation, dominance and control, disguised by telling me I needed to 'relax' so I could have an orgasm and that I must be 'frigid'.


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## Stonewall (Jul 5, 2011)

He has a problem. Period! There is nothing that makes me happier than giving my wife oral. When I'm really on my game it makes her climb the wall. In fact I get very disappointed with myself if I don't get a very vocal reaction out of her. It tells me I need to work harder at it and pay more attention to her clues and reaction. 

Any man who has a good wife (like mine) and doesn't have that drive to please her is narcissistic at the least and probably an a****** to boot. I am game for whatever gets her excited. The more she gets off the happier I am and the greater sense of accomplishment I get. Your H should get a clue!!


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## Mom6547 (Jul 13, 2010)

Make sure you don't have BV or a yest infection. I would not go down on a woman with BV either because it just plain smells bad.


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## Chelhxi (Oct 30, 2008)

I would never agree to a threesome in real life but theoretically, as oral is a hot topic between us (he won't; I love it), if the situation happened to me, I would have stopped the threesome action immediately right then. I'm sure I'd have gotten angrier than I've ever been in years as well. That's just something out of a horribly bad dream to see my H doing that do another girl.


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## michzz (Jun 6, 2008)

He told you whatever you needed to hear to make it ok to bring in these girls. Then he did whatever he wanted to do.

You and he have major boundary issues and he has a deception problem.

Whether or not he would do what pleases you in bed is both hardly the issue and the issue.

One is structural, the other immediate.

Your marriage needs structural change!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## piqued (Mar 25, 2010)

Stonewall said:


> He has a problem. Period! There is nothing that makes me happier than giving my wife oral. When I'm really on my game it makes her climb the wall. In fact I get very disappointed with myself if I don't get a very vocal reaction out of her. It tells me I need to work harder at it and pay more attention to her clues and reaction.
> 
> Any man who has a good wife (like mine) and doesn't have that drive to please her is narcissistic at the least and probably an a****** to boot. I am game for whatever gets her excited. The more she gets off the happier I am and the greater sense of accomplishment I get. Your H should get a clue!!



+1000, agree completely


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## piqued (Mar 25, 2010)

LOL, we all can't inspect you to say if you have a "wierd" or otherwise undesirable vagina, but to be honest it sounds like a load of sh*t.

Eating out a women is probably a fantasy of his (like the threesomes) but for some reason he doesn't feel it is manly to do this to one's wife. Maybe he has to feel dominant, and giving oral to his wife makes him feel less than powerful.

Or it's something else but I'd say the chances are 80% or better it's some psychological hang up of his rather than anything to do with actually not liking your vagina. And, it doesn't seem like he has a very good method of opening up or communicating whatever his real issues are.

I take you at your word that, til now, he's been a good husband. But from the outside looking in he seems selfish. Maybe you're the exception, but I'd bet the MFF threesome was originally his idea. It appears he's always welcomed, if not asked for oral. In other words, he seems pretty locked in to what HE wants sexually, but seems to have a lack of a sustaining desire to please YOU. That is what counseling is for. As far as the wierd vagina, I know words sting, but I'd really try to let that go knowing its probably an excuse for some other issue he has, and try to get to that issue in counseling. If you can solve the real issue, and open his eyes to his self-centeredness, then the rest will fall into place.:smthumbup:


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

While I don't have one, were I a Vulvic-American, I would be mightly insulted and pissed off by this. There are few things prettier than a vulva. If even sounds pretty.


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## Undertheradar (May 11, 2011)

I'm sorry, but I need to harp on the stated obvious.

THE GUY SAYS IT TASTES WEIRD!!!

Doesn't that account for anything? I'm a man, and there's no way am I munching on a foul tasting woman. And I don't care WHO she is!
Maybe he's being honest.


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## cherrypie18 (Feb 21, 2010)

wait wait, all other issues aside, why is it ok to bring another woman into their bed and he eats her out but he's not down with bringing another man for the wife to go down on or get eaten out???? selfish jerk?? i think so!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## fhg1893 (Jun 25, 2011)

michzz said:


> He told you whatever you needed to hear to make it ok to bring in these girls. Then he did whatever he wanted to do.
> 
> You and he have major boundary issues and he has a deception problem.
> 
> ...


:iagree: This.

If my wife enjoyed oral, she'd find me happily lapping away at every opportunity.

Of course it tastes a little weird, but I thought that was all just a part of the experience. Awesome part if you ask me but to each their own...

This guy isn't being fair with you at all. You went so far as to put honey, which is probably not the best for that spot? If my wife put honey on herself, I think I'd start taking all my meals from- I mean he went down on other girls, but not you? It doesn't matter what he says, you should immediately stop going down on him. It sure sounds like he's being a selfish jerk.


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## cherrypie18 (Feb 21, 2010)

Undertheradar said:


> I'm sorry, but I need to harp on the stated obvious.
> 
> THE GUY SAYS IT TASTES WEIRD!!!
> 
> ...


how did he know that the other woman didn't or wouldn't also taste weird before munching away at her vaj?? what, he can just tell from the shape what it's gonna taste like? i think all vaginas and penises and the fluids they secrete would taste weird...it would be odd if a vagina tasted like rose water... I'd be very mad if my husband licked someone else and rejected me.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Undertheradar (May 11, 2011)

cherrypie18 said:


> how did he know that the other woman didn't or wouldn't also taste weird before munching away at her vaj?? what, he can just tell from the shape what it's gonna taste like? i think all vaginas and penises and the fluids they secrete would taste weird...it would be odd if a vagina tasted like rose water... I'd be very mad if my husband licked someone else and rejected me.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Yes, true... 
But there's a possibility that hers' does in fact taste yucky, and this other woman had a pleasant, and "normal" taste to it. If the other woman tasted gross, I'm sure he would have backed off.


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## Laurae1967 (May 10, 2011)

I don't think this issue really has anything to do with her taste. The fact that he was so callous in how he said it to her "You taste weird" says a lot about his lack of care and concern for his wife. And even if she did taste weird, the fact that he went ahead and ate out two other girls in front of his wife, after saying he wouldn't, shows that he's a selfish, insensitive person who really doesn't care about his wife's feelings.

Balls and penises smell funky (even after a shower) and that's just part of the deal. Barring any infection she may have (doubtful), her husband is not trying to accommodate his wife and what she wants. And her previous partners never had a problem with her kitty. This situation is really about the husband's selfishness.

Personally, I think it's part of his way of keeping his wife down and off balance so he can manipulate and control her.


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## cherrypie18 (Feb 21, 2010)

Undertheradar said:


> Yes, true...
> But there's a possibility that hers' does in fact taste yucky, and this other woman had a pleasant, and "normal" taste to it. If the other woman tasted gross, I'm sure he would have backed off.


All that is true but he lied to the wife that he didn't like giving oral but he still went down on the other woman, without knowing what she tasted like. I don't really think taste is the issue here. It's merely an excuse. 



Cotton_Candy_&_Bubblegum said:


> In both situations he ate them out especially with the second encounter* he was asking her a lot to eat her out*. I asked him later why he doesn't eat me out but will eat her out and he said I taste weird.


I think 3somes are just plain wrong wrong wrong.


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## cherrypie18 (Feb 21, 2010)

Laurae1967 said:


> I don't think this issue really has anything to do with her taste. The fact that he was so callous in how he said it to her "You taste weird" says a lot about his lack of care and concern for his wife. And even if she did taste weird, the fact that he went ahead and ate out two other girls in front of his wife, after saying he wouldn't, shows that he's a selfish, insensitive person who really doesn't care about his wife's feelings.
> 
> Balls and penises smell funky (even after a shower) and that's just part of the deal. Barring any infection she may have (doubtful), her husband is not trying to accommodate his wife and what she wants. And her previous partners never had a problem with her kitty. This situation is really about the husband's selfishness.
> 
> Personally, I think it's part of his way of keeping his wife down and off balance so he can manipulate and control her.


Exactly! It's just plain rude I would say lol


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## Stonewall (Jul 5, 2011)

Laurae1967 said:


> I don't think this issue really has anything to do with her taste. The fact that he was so callous in how he said it to her "You taste weird" says a lot about his lack of care and concern for his wife. And even if she did taste weird, the fact that he went ahead and ate out two other girls in front of his wife, after saying he wouldn't, shows that he's a selfish, insensitive person who really doesn't care about his wife's feelings.
> 
> Balls and penises smell funky (even after a shower) and that's just part of the deal. Barring any infection she may have (doubtful), her husband is not trying to accommodate his wife and what she wants. And her previous partners never had a problem with her kitty. This situation is really about the husband's selfishness.
> 
> Personally, I think it's part of his way of keeping his wife down and off balance so he can manipulate and control her.


Dead on! Laurae nails it!


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## Syrum (Feb 22, 2011)

Undertheradar said:


> I'm sorry, but I need to harp on the stated obvious.
> 
> THE GUY SAYS IT TASTES WEIRD!!!
> 
> ...


 lucky men's d !cks taste like cottan candy and rainbows.

Seriously, even if she had a yeast infection or something it wouldn't last the entire length of the relationship.



> Stonewall View Post
> He has a problem. Period! There is nothing that makes me happier than giving my wife oral. When I'm really on my game it makes her climb the wall. In fact I get very disappointed with myself if I don't get a very vocal reaction out of her. It tells me I need to work harder at it and pay more attention to her clues and reaction.
> 
> Any man who has a good wife (like mine) and doesn't have that drive to please her is narcissistic at the least and probably an a****** to boot. I am game for whatever gets her excited. The more she gets off the happier I am and the greater sense of accomplishment I get. Your H should get a clue!!


:iagree:

And many women go into having threesomes because they think it will make their man love them more, find them sexier and more awesome, but he if he really loved you he would value you, he would care about your needs and what you want. he would certainly should never be cruel about your vagina.

If my SO said something like that I'd be loathe to allow him to touch me or go anywhere near my vagina again. I really would be that upset, that I had allowed someone near the most intimate part of me and they didn't consider themselves the luckiest person ever.


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## weR2 (Jul 9, 2011)

Hi, I am new to this site but would like to comment on this thread. Nobody here can evaluate your flavor, nor the flavor of the other women. BUT, I can tell you from prior experience:
1) Years ago, I dated a woman for a time that did not shave, and although she showered and scrubbed thoroughly (I actually washed her and she washed me on various occasions), she still had a urine smell and taste to her. I never said anything to her, but avoided oral with her at all cost. It is because of that experience that I keep myself at least trimmed, I would not want my SO to have to deal with that. Although, I have some friends comment during "guy talk" that they like that urine taste and smell as a pretext to oral. CRINGE!
2) It is seldom that I will have intercourse without oral first, or during. Having said that, I have experienced many flavors from my SO at various times over the last 25+ years. The food that she eats, the drinks that she drinks, the medication that she is on, and the stress that she is going through all affect her flavor. Alcohol is least appealing to me. She has also indicated to me that when I drink alcohol, she does not like the taste of me.
3) I also noticed that when we have sex daily, she tastes much sweeter than if we do not have sex for a couple days. The first couple days after her menstrual cycle and the couple days before her menstrual cycle also seem to affect the flavor. It seems that as she "drains" from the previous sex session she tastes sweeter the next day.

Just some thoughts:
!) Do you shave? If not, try to shave at least the vulva area and trim the other area. Then taste yourself, work yourself up and taste yourself again.
2) Try to eat natural foods and drinks at least for a few days, not too acidic. See if you can see a difference in the taste.
3) Once you have found your taste pleasing, have sex with him for at two consecutive days. DO NOT be afraid to be aggressive with him, show him that you want HIM. Then, get on top of him, work him up a bit, then begin to play with yourself. When you work yourself up, taste yourself so that he can see that you like the flavor. When he sees that, move up to his face and put yourself where you need to be, just within smelling distance. From there, let him take the first taste. See what happens!

Please do not just blame him, as he may have a legitimate excuse. In a relationship, we should grow together. Communication and understanding are key here. I do not believe that you should just assume that whatever the taste might be, he should just be there and accept it. He has tried to communicate to you his concern and thoughts, now it is up to you. Do you just consider him an a***ole or do you attempt to remedy the situation.

By the way, I do disagree with his comment about you having sex with another, what is good for the goose is good for the gander. That is another situation apart from the oral sex. Please keep us informed so that we can expand our knowledge. Good luck


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## sexuallyfustrated (Mar 24, 2011)

Cotton_Candy_&_Bubblegum said:


> My husband and I have had a great relationship up until about 2 months ago. He is caring, helps with the children, cooks dinners, provides well for his family etc, etc. We are a young couple and decided to have a 3-some with an acquaintance which went well with no issues, we actually where closer afterwards. We didn't expect the same scenario to happen so soon after but about 4 months later it happened again with a mutual female friend, now before any of these two events occurred we discussed rules, that we use protection, not to much intimacy with the third party and no oral on the other girl because he has always told me he didn't like it and didn't do it to me so I didn't think it was fair if she got that special treatment.
> 
> In both situations he ate them out especially with the second encounter he was asking her a lot to eat her out. I asked him later why he doesn't eat me out but will eat her out and he said I taste weird. I always thought I was clean I take showers daily and I have never heard a comment from previous relationships about this. I asked him why he did it and that I told him not to, his reply was that he didn't hear me say that. and then I made him very aware that I was hurt and we are never going to have any other sexual encounters with another girl again. We agreed because we felt it wasn't healthy for our relationship and from what I saw he wanted to work on it I read to put honey on my special area to make it taste better. So one night I made it special and took a shower, lit candles, put some loungerie on and got some honey that night went well it seemed to help a lot the next week we where at the farmers market and he even bought me some honey so I was proud he was trying.
> 
> ...


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## sexuallyfustrated (Mar 24, 2011)

I have always like eating fruit especially pineapples. I always like to google the benefits of things. From water, fruit, castor oil what ever. I did this with the pineapples and it said improves the taste of both men and women. As I said I eat fruit often. For the most part thats all I eat. My husband has always loved the way I taste. Most times it fustrates me for him to go down because he is just learning to do it correctly but he goes there for quite sometime and has a ball lol.....he just moans and says over and over how good I taste. Try that see if it helps.


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## Halien (Feb 20, 2011)

Cotton_Candy_&_Bubblegum said:


> I mentioned that with another man and he said he would punch him out... I told him I didn't want to anyways because I am his woman and I don't even want to be with another man.. but then I mentioned that I love kissing and maybe I should be able to kiss two guys because I actually do miss that... obviously it wasn't a constructive situation and we fought about it.


You saw it as fair to let him add a woman, but he would punch another guy out for having sex with you?

Sorry to be a killjoy, but if you take a selfish guy, enable him to be more selfish, you will not get much other than selfish results.

Before we are married, the new conquest is always the most arousing in an immature way. Its sometimes like a kids in a candy shop. You'll do whatever. The new vagina is like a treat. So it is completely normal that he would be more aggressive sexually with you for a short while afterwards. Those memories of her don't go away immediately. And the anticipation makes him excited, but you are the only one there until the next time.

Take a look at his motives. The average guy would be incredibly flattered to have a wife who wants the attention you crave. And most would never want to hurt you by bringing another woman into it in the first place.


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## piqued (Mar 25, 2010)

cherrypie18 said:


> All that is true but he lied to the wife that he didn't like giving oral but he still went down on the other woman, without knowing what she tasted like. I don't really think taste is the issue here. It's merely an excuse.
> 
> ^^^^RIGHT ON^^^^ Oops, didn't mean to include this in cherrypie's quote.
> 
> I think 3somes are just plain wrong wrong wrong.


^^^But what about foursomes?^^^ JK



> Sorry to be a killjoy, but if you take a selfish guy, enable him to be more selfish, you will not get much other than selfish results.
> 
> Take a look at his motives. The average guy would be incredibly flattered to have a wife who wants the attention you crave. And most would never want to hurt you by bringing another woman into it in the first place.


^^^Right On Halien^^^

I think the biggest issue at play here is he is being selfish. Sorry, don't mean to bash him without meeting him, but a husband should respect, revere, and relish a wife's vagina (as well as the rest of her). An essential part of becoming one in marriage is the WANT of each partner to make the other partner scream with delight on the partner's terms, not one's own.


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

I also am angry they got the Bentley TOO clean this time.


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## couple (Nov 6, 2010)

This answer is simple and easy....Both men and women go to more effort to please a new lover. It's only natural that one wants to impress a new lover and to make him or her feel like we are good lovers. And with a man, pressure to "please" a woman can be great. Some guys see eating a girl out as somewhat of an insurance policy that reduces any feared performance or size shortcomings.

this is a very easy explanation but points to the problems of a threesome...jealously can occur when actions with the new third party are different or exceed those between the married couple. This is normal (e.g. "she screamed too loud with the new guy" or "he was a little too interested in the other girl's big [email protected]", etc.). You can't expect the sex to be the same in intensity as compared to a married couple who have had sex probably 150+ times together.


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

It's time for a blindfolded taste test
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## 4sure (Aug 8, 2010)

Watch the husband. I think he may try to hook back up with this woman.


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## Cotton_Candy_&_Bubblegum (Jul 7, 2011)

UPDATE: 

I want to say thank you for all the great different input. I absorbed it and went with what I thought was best for my marriage. I want to clear up some of the comments before I explain what me and my husband did to resolve this issue.

I initiated the three some more than my husband did.
I do not have BV or yeast infection... I was tested at DR. everything is Fine!
I do believe my husband was being a selfish lover lately
I do believe that my husband is faithful and will not cheat on me with the other woman or any woman. 
I do not taste weird, for each their own, because past boyfriends enjoyed my taste thank you very much
regarding why no 3some with a man but only with a woman. I am bi. he is not. it would be weird plus I truly only want to be with my husband I don't think I would like a 3some with another guy either
why did he eat her out after I told him not to. I guess he did not hear me or attain the info when I explained to him not to and he was in the heat of the moment I truly believe him. (Men are the worst at multi-tasking it is scientifically proven. 


there was a list of things that needed to be discussed and every-time in the past when I tried to explain and work things out with my husband it would become an argument... So I spent all Saturday at a friends house. she is a good friend and also went to school for counseling. I told here the whole situation and gave her all the details I could (We talked for hours) and this is what we came up with. that I need to sit down and just talk to him. Make sure there is no distractions (no t.v., no radio, kids asleep .... just me and him at the kitchen table) I wrote word for word out because I am not a person that is good with conflict or serious relationship talking of the such and I usually end up saying what I want to say in the wrong way or come on as if I am attacking him. So I made the conversation all about me and how I feel. I explained to him that i feel hurt and that I need more dates, oral etc. 

he explained that he doesn't really like oral but did it because he was in the heat of the moment. In a 3some. He did what he thought the man should do in a 3some and he apologized that he hurt me, that was never his intentions and said he still doesn't want to do oral with me. I told him, me being his wife I need it and that once a month would be sufficient and I would then resume giving BJ's like I used to. He neglectfully inclined. BUT surprise surprise since our discussion Sat night he has done it every night and I think since he has done it he is liking it more and more.... I am such a Happy Wife that I wake that man up every morning 5 minutes before his alarm goes off for work with the greatest BJ that any husband can get from his wife.....

I just hope that it doesn't last a week, and he consistently works on pleasing me... in and out of the bedroom as I do the same for him. 

Thanks for all the support and advice on the situation!!! Until next time because we all know marriages are like roller coasters!!!


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## weR2 (Jul 9, 2011)

Hoorah! So glad that everything is cumming together.


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## Kobo (May 13, 2010)

_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## stars (Jan 7, 2013)

Did you and your husband work it out? I taught human sexuality for a few years and heard so many stories very similar to yours. It never seems like a good idea to bring other people into your bedroom. So you are definitely not alone. The only suggestion I do have is not to use anything in your vaginal area that has sugar in it (like artificially flavored stuff, honey, candy etc). It can cause lots of problems. For a long time I didn't know what to use... that was natural and tasted good because I was always worried about smelling and tasting clean while he was down there. Then one of my friends gave me a little jar of Yume Blush edible cream that she got online. I have been hooked ever since. It's safe everywhere and the flavors taste real. It really does make everything smell and taste so good...with out any infections!!


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## dubbizle (Jan 15, 2012)

You sound like a very good/fun wife setting up a threesome with another woman for your husband,if my wife did that for me and I knew she liked oral it would take the jaws of life to get me off her every day to pay her back.I also think being BI you are going to want to do another threesome in the future since its part of who you areonce this blows over so next time sit down and writre out what you can do and not do way before hand.I know a number a swingers who have been married for a long long time and they say communication is the key. 

Its great that you spoke up and talked to him.


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## CanadianGuy (Jun 17, 2012)

stars said:


> Did you and your husband work it out? I taught human sexuality for a few years and heard so many stories very similar to yours. It never seems like a good idea to bring other people into your bedroom. So you are definitely not alone. The only suggestion I do have is not to use anything in your vaginal area that has sugar in it (like artificially flavored stuff, honey, candy etc). It can cause lots of problems. For a long time I didn't know what to use... that was natural and tasted good because I was always worried about smelling and tasting clean while he was down there. Then one of my friends gave me a little jar of Yume Blush edible cream that she got online. I have been hooked ever since. It's safe everywhere and the flavors taste real. It really does make everything smell and taste so good...with out any infections!!


Stars- This post is from 2011.


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## Chaparral (Jul 17, 2011)

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