# What's the bottom line?



## Gemini79 (Oct 9, 2010)

OK, once and for all...how important is it to have your woman be happy? What is the reason you got into a committed relationship/marriage?:scratchhead:


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## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

Gemini79 said:


> OK, once and for all...how important is it to have your woman be happy? What is the reason you got into a committed relationship/marriage?:scratchhead:


How do you think you can "make her happy"?

And, it that a choice a man can make for her?


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

i really dont know what makes my wife happy. she is very difficult to figure out in that regard. too many things going on with her physically to know what mood im going to get from day to day.


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## Chris Taylor (Jul 22, 2010)

it's difficult to know what makes a woman happy... security, emotional support, financial stability.

All I know is that when she's really happy, I know it. When she's really unhappy, I know that, too. it's that middle ground where I'm supposed to read her mind where I get in trouble.


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## soccermom (Oct 13, 2010)

Make her feel like she is your queen.

Most women need to feel loved, secure and treasured. When that happens, a man will be treated like her king.

Tell her she's beautiful, tell her she's the only woman for you, touch the nape of her neck when you kiss her, give her a hug for no reason, give her a passionate kiss out of the blue, tell her you adore her. Make her feel like she is the only woman in the world for you.


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## Rob774 (Sep 27, 2010)

Taking notes...

Its good to get woman's points of views on here, instead of having to ask what the wife what she wants.


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## Mom6547 (Jul 13, 2010)

Why is it so hard to ask what your wife wants, Rob? The way you say that "having to ask what the wife wants"... I don't get it.

Anyway no one can MAKE another person happy.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

My take is, making her happy is different then making her happy with you.
My wife was happy getting the attention from other guys, but since I stopped dismissing her and started to reconize her excistence, she was happier with me then with them. 
So, I'm making her happy with me by doing that luvy dovy stuff .


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## Nekko (Oct 13, 2009)

Well, I don't really believe that someone can make someone else happy. Happi-er, yes, that could work. Someone could hurt and make someone else unhappy though. 

What i want right now would be to feel like he genuinely gives a damn, finds me important and wants to be with me. When we start out we listen to everything the other person has to say, pay attention, comfort them. After we're married for 5,10,15 years, we tend to ignore some stuff "ah, he's annoyed about his job again, i'm tired of that" "oh, she's having her period and she's acting crazy again"...or whatever else, those were just some examples. 

We're not there for eachother as we used to be. The person who doesn't get the attention anymore sometimes feels neglected (whether it's sex, talking, spending time together, understanding, respect...). So i guess some people (like me) want to go back to how it used to be when we were top priority in our partner's lives. 
"I stopped dismissing her and started to reconize her excistence" that's one thing that my husband could do to make me happier right now. 

@vthomeschoolmom for some people (like my husband), just asking doesn't work. He feels like telling me what's lacking means he's complaining. I've worked hard to make him understand that it's communicating and sharing, not complaining. he doesn't get it so i have to sit around on these forums, see what other people want from their marriage and spouse, try to relate and guess what he needs. Fun eh?


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## greeneyeddolphin (May 31, 2010)

Well, I'm not a guy but I'll give you my two cents anyway. 

It's not my boyfriend's job to "make" me happy, nor can he. If I'm not happy with my life in general, there wouldn't be anything he could do to make me happy. He can make me happier with my life, by helping to fill out another part of my life. Meaning, if I'm happy with career, home, kids, etc., he, by being my boyfriend and loving me and being someone I can love, can make me happpier than I already was.

At the same time, while he can't make me happy, he could make me unhappy. Your partner can make you unhappy by ignoring or neglecting you, cheating on you, lying to you, being unsupportive, being lazy, uncommunicative, controlling...there's a pretty extensive list of the things people can do to make another person unhappy. 

I guess the basic rule would be to not do the things that would make them unhappy and you'll be fine.


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## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

It's the old trap.

She tells you what it will take, you do it.

Then, there's something wrong with it.

And, then on to the next thing.

Focus on making yourself attractive to her.

That's the key.


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