# wife had a drunken one night stand help!!!!!!!!!!



## heartbrokensoul

Hi everyone im new here im just after a bit of advise
hope ye can help
ok so heres the story my wife of seven yrs 2 kids went out with some friends for drinks over the christmas.

i refused to go because my wife said she was drinking and any time we go out drinking together it always ends in a massive row
i had promised to go until she said she was drinking(she gets very messy and dont no when enough is enough)

this upset her very much because we were not out together in a good while so she went without me the biggest regret ot my life

she did not return home until 7:30am which raised my suspicions quiet a bit

i waited a while until she was asleep and i checked her cell phone for evidence to my horror there was 3 messeges one from a strange number and 2 replys to same number

the message read like this... ye id let you do what ever you wanted to do to me xxx then she replyed to him il see. then she sent the last message at 7;15am saying nite nite.

i calmed myself down then went and woke my wife she denied everything saying her friend used her phone and **** but the last message she sent was after she got home so she was caught

she eventually confessed to sleeping with this guy back at a house party after she got waisted.She says she cant remember much about it either which i need answers to

she swears she will never drink again if i give her another chance we have so much to lose i dont no what to do

she is very remorsfull for her actions and it has hit her really hard she is so disgusted how can i for give the woman that i love for doing this to your family 

do people think a one night stand is worse than an affair 

sorry for such a long rant 
thanks for the replys in advance 
happy new year to everyone:smthumbup::smthumbup:


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## Chris Taylor

Doesn't matter whether WE think one is worse than the other... the fact is she cheated on you.

You have to set some immediate boundaries:

- Once chance to give you the full story. If anything comes out later, all bets are off.

- no drinking. Period. Not social, not partying.

- transparency on her phone, computer, emails, voice mails. Nothing hidden.

- marriage counseling for both of you.

- STD testing for both of you (assuming you had sex with her since).


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## Rags

Happy new year indeed.

All I can say is - people who have experienced this, and worse, will tell you what your options are, and what to do.

Listen to them. They know what works.

And then decide, first for yourself, then for your family, what to do.

Good luck.


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## Chaparral

Who was the guy? She was with your friends, what have they said? Was she drunk when she got home?


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## Plan 9 from OS

I have a hard time believing that the wife does not know who the guy is. Considering they exchanged phone numbers, it's pretty clear that she knows his name. C'mon, what's she supposed to do say "hey you" whenever she calls or texts this guy???

Sorry OP, but my suspicion that you know your wifes ONS partner. I doubt he's a stranger. Was the sex unprotected? Was there anything in her panties? Sorry to be so graphic, but these are details you will probably want to know. So sorry to find you here.


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## Chaparral

You need to check her phone, texts, and emails. Do this without telling her. The first thing you need to find out is if this is the first time she has gotten drunk and screwed around. Get a VAR , Velcro it under her drivers eat and see what she is saying to her friends about this.

Just doesn't seem like this is the only time if she can't hold her alcohol.


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## heartbrokensoul

the guy was someone she new from school 
sorry she was out with her friends which i cant believe them
she was very drunk when she came home and still was when i woke her


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## The Middleman

heartbrokensoul said:


> ok so heres the story my wife of seven yrs 2 kids went out with some friends for drinks over the christmas.
> 
> *i refused to go because my wife said she was drinking and any time we go out drinking together it always ends in a massive row*
> i had promised to go until she said she was drinking(she gets very messy and dont no when enough is enough)


I'm sorry if this is going to sound harsh but what I bolded above was *your* huge mistake. *What man allows his wife to go to a party alone where drinking is involved.* Especially if he knows she has personality issues when drinking. That's just dumb. You must at least have had an inkling that something like this would happen! At least I hope they had protected sex (doubtful)

Normally, I'd advise you to separate, at least temporarily, to help you get your head together and to show her how serious you are, but I don't think you'll do that. You're going to get some good advice from some of the others here .... please take it.


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## Hope1964

I am so very sorry this has happened  Please read the newbie link in my signature. There is a ton of info in there you need to know.

Cheaters follow a script. They don't admit to any more than they have to. You can rest assured she is NOT telling you everything.

If she is truly remorseful she will want to do everything she possibly can to fix this with you. And it's very fixable. But only if she does what she needs to. STD testing, admit who the guy was, open up her entire life to scrutiny to prove this hasn't happened before, quit drinking and doing GNO, get counseling for herself and MC when the time comes (that will be if and when you decide to reconcile. That is, YOU, yourself. It's up to you here, not her), write a no contact text/email/letter whatever to the OM.


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## Chaparral

These are your friends and hers? Why did they not stop her? No way she can drink again. I doubt this is the first time.


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## tom67

Tell her you will schedule a polygraph test. Ask her if she needs help with stopping the alcohol such as a treatment center.


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## teresa

I am a widow and I know how kids suffer when they miss one parent. I would've done anything to keep my husband at home if I could; try to work things up if you love her and you think she loves you. There is a lot at stake here: your kids. Nowadays it seems like the answer is divorce and I think that when there are kids involved the answer is to make it happen. Nobody is perfect, there is no excuse for her behavior and she should've thought of her kids and loosing you before doing something stupid. Be the better person and think things through. Good luck.


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## Hope1964

teresa said:


> I am a widow and I know how kids suffer when they miss one parent. I would've done anything to keep my husband at home if I could; try to work things up if you love her and you think she loves you. There is a lot at stake here: your kids. Nowadays it seems like the answer is divorce and I think that when there are kids involved the answer is to make it happen. Nobody is perfect, there is no excuse for her behavior and she should've thought of her kids and loosing you before doing something stupid. Be the better person and think things through. Good luck.


This is the WRONG thing to do when your spouse has cheated. I am very sorry for the loss of your husband, but it's a whole nother ball game when you've been cheated on.


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## walkonmars

You have been married 7 years. In many marriages this is the time things begin to go stale. 

Your wife likes to drink. She fights with you so often you refused to go with her.
You admitted it was a mistake. You chose to avoid a fight rather than exercise your role as the head of your household. Don't ever do this again. You have more responsibilities than just bringing home a paycheck.

She exercised very bad judgement in continuing to drink to excess. She is an alcoholic. 

Check with the people she went with. Find out if they stayed as a group or if she parted company early in the evening. As Plan 9 suggested, the OM is probably someone well known to you.

Infidelity, poor boundaries, alcoholism, deception, boredom. Thes are the issues that are on het plate.

Derelection as the head of the household is on you plate. You need to clean up both plates.


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## HappyHubby

If it were me I do not think I could get over the bitter anger if I did not take control back and provide serious consequences. I would separate and make her believe that it is likely the end of the marriage and see her reaction. Her complete and utter snot-oozing grovelling submission would be the only way I could continue the relationship. That, and a good deal of time away from her to put energy into myself (workout, play sports, hang out with friends, etc.). Tell her to leave the house and work on herself and if she can stay sober for 3 months and you feel like you can forgive her and trust her after that point you will be willing to talk to her again. 

That's me anyway


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## Acabado

walkonmars said:


> She is an alcoholic.


This.
And a cheater. She did willingly, porpously.


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## sharkeey

Acabado said:


> This.
> And a cheater. She did willingly, porpously.


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## keko

One night stand IS an affair. I'm not sure what you're trying to ask.

It's pretty obvious this was going to happen when you send out your spouse to party and get drunk.

Now you need to ask yourself should you take the risk and stay with a girl that's quite easy to score by other men.


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## carmen ohio

heartbrokensoul said:


> Hi everyone im new here im just after a bit of advise
> hope ye can help
> ok so heres the story my wife of seven yrs 2 kids went out with some friends for drinks over the christmas.
> 
> i refused to go because my wife said she was drinking and any time we go out drinking together it always ends in a massive row
> i had promised to go until she said she was drinking(she gets very messy and dont no when enough is enough)
> 
> this upset her very much because we were not out together in a good while so she went without me the biggest regret ot my life
> 
> she did not return home until 7:30am which raised my suspicions quiet a bit
> 
> i waited a while until she was asleep and i checked her cell phone for evidence to my horror there was 3 messeges one from a strange number and 2 replys to same number
> 
> the message read like this... ye id let you do what ever you wanted to do to me xxx then she replyed to him il see. then she sent the last message at 7;15am saying nite nite.
> 
> i calmed myself down then went and woke my wife she denied everything saying her friend used her phone and **** but the last message she sent was after she got home so she was caught
> 
> she eventually confessed to sleeping with this guy back at a house party after she got waisted.She says she cant remember much about it either which i need answers to
> 
> she swears she will never drink again if i give her another chance we have so much to lose i dont no what to do
> 
> she is very remorsfull for her actions and it has hit her really hard she is so disgusted how can i for give the woman that i love for doing this to your family
> 
> do people think a one night stand is worse than an affair
> 
> sorry for such a long rant
> thanks for the replys in advance
> happy new year to everyone:smthumbup::smthumbup:



Dear heartbrokensoul,

I'm really sorry for you and your kids. You need to fight through the mental anguish you're experiencing and use your head before deciding what to do. Consider the following:

- As others have said, your WW has a serious drinking problem. This will make reconciliation much more difficult, maybe impossible since it means she has to deal with two problems simultaneously. You should insist that she get into an alcoholic rehabilitation program.

- Your WW has not only cheated on you, she's lied to your face about it. She's still lying if she claims not to remember the details (she was sober enough when she left him to send her lover a "nite nite" message). That means you can't trust anything she says, including that she is remorseful. That makes the chances of her straightening herself out even less likely. Don't be fooled by her words. Only her actions count.

- While it's possible that this was the first time she's cheated, if she is in the habit of going out with her friends without you and drinking, it's not very likely. You need to know whether this was really a ONS or if it's only the tip of the proverbial iceberg. If she's a habitual cheater, then the odds of her ever being faithful go even lower.

- You shouldn't even be thinking about forgiveness right now, not until you know all the facts and have observed her over a long enough period of time to satisfy yourself that she is not going to do this again. We're not talking weeks here or even a few months; more like six months to a year.

- In the meantime, you need to make sure she knows that her marriage is on the line. My recommendation would be to file for divorce. I'm not saying divorce her, just start the process. That will drive the point home stronger than anything else you can do. Tell her that, if she does everything you ask, including being totally honest, stops drinking, is an open book, etc., you will consider halting the divorce proceedings. If you think filing for divorce is too extreme (it's not, but a lot of guys can't bring themselves to do it until their marriage is in shambles and it's their only option), then think of something else that will make her believe that you are prepared to leave. Don't rely on mere threats because threats that aren't backed up by action are easily ignored.

- You and she need to reveal what she's done to your respective families and close friends. Nothing kills an affair faster than exposure to the light and the shame that goes with it.

- For the foreseeable future, treat your WW with respect but also with a degree of indifference. Don't show your emotions in front of her (cry in private). Don't berate or argue with her. Don't show her affection. You want her to realize that you have one foot out the door and that you are perfectly capable of living without her.

- Get total transparency as to her whereabouts at all times and her communications with others. You should have complete access to all of her electronic accounts and communications devices. She should let you know where she is at all times and be available to speak with you any time you call her. Keep close tabs on her, especially for the first few months when the danger of her slipping up are the greatest.

- You are going to have some pretty bad feelings for a long time about this. Take care of yourself. Don't drink. Get as much rest as you can. Exercise. Spend lots of time with your kids. Occupy your time in useful endeavors (your work, charitable organizations, sports), whatever helps you to keep sane. Rely on family and friends for support. Get counseling.

There's a lot more to fixing a marriage than this, but it's a good place to start.

I hope this works out for you. If you remain strong and let her know that you are prepared to make a life for yourself without her, it probably will. If you put all of your eggs in the reconciliation basket and "forgive" too soon, it probably won't.

Good luck.


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## Shaggy

She claims she was too drunk for details, but she was sober enough to get home and to send texts.

Notice too that she was focused enough at home to be texting him. That's not a drunk looking to crash and pass out, that was a cheater saying goodnight to her OM and doing do knowing full well what she was doing,

Notice too there wasn't any guilt at all. No feelings of remorse or fear of getting caught. She did care. Now she's upset at getting caught,not remorseful choosing to have sex. Oh, anywhere did they do it? Certainly people would have noticed , see she didn't care and her do called friends were more than happy to lie and cover for her.

If you do give her another can, those friends are history forever. They happily let her cheat they happily covered for her.

Makes you wonder if this was really the first and only time.

It is also nasty that if this was her first time cheating, she went straight to letting him do anything. Does she offer you anything you want sexually?

Usually first time cheaters are just oral or a quick penetration, but she's offering him anything which makes me think ths is not their first time. If it was, why is she trying to spice it up?

I think you'd better get a polygraph.
She dumps those friends forever
She stops drinking forever.
And the she needs to work on why she was open to him doing anything. Even drunk that's a pretty extreme choice.


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## Shaggy

Also follow up and find the other guy. Find everything about him, does he have a wife or gf? If so tell her cheated.

Your wife must also get an std test.


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## Jonesey

Sorry to see you here. But the bolded part´s makes me think this was either pre planed.Or it has been going on for a while.
I hope im wrong.But as a minimum i would check here phone records and also install a key-logger. This does not make any sense.







heartbrokensoul said:


> Hi everyone im new here im just after a bit of advise
> hope ye can help
> ok so heres the story my wife of seven yrs 2 kids went out with some friends for drinks over the christmas.
> 
> i refused to go because my wife said she was drinking and any time we go out drinking together it always ends in a massive row
> i had promised to go until she said she was drinking(she gets very messy and dont no when enough is enough)
> 
> this upset her very much because we were not out together in a good while so she went without me the biggest regret ot my life
> 
> she did not return home until 7:30am which raised my suspicions quiet a bit
> 
> *i waited a while until she was asleep and i checked her cell phone for evidence* Why? Any reason? Phone record´s
> 
> to my horror there was _*3 messeges*_ *one from a strange number and 2 replys to same number*
> 
> the message read like this... *ye id let you do what ever you wanted to do to me xxx* *then she replyed to him il see*.
> 
> then she sent the last message at 7;15am saying nite nite.
> 
> i calmed myself down then went and woke my wife she denied everything saying her friend used her phone and **** but the last message she sent was after she got home so she was caught
> 
> she eventually *confessed to sleeping with this guy back at a house party after she got waisted.* So why the 3 sms? Waisted she said.Hmm strange.
> 
> *She says she cant remember much about it either* Remember nite nite. Waisted and don´t remember.which i need answers to
> 
> she swears she will never drink again if i give her another chance *we have so much to lose *Correction she has much to loose.. i *dont no what to do* Key logger, And check phone record´s is what you should do..
> 
> 
> she is very remorsfull for her actions and it has hit her really hard she is so disgusted how can i for give the woman that i love for doing this to your family
> 
> do people think a one night stand is worse than an affair
> 
> sorry for such a long rant
> thanks for the replys in advance
> happy new year to everyone:smthumbup::smthumbup:


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## thatbpguy

First, there are no excuses for her betrayal. If you are going to start accepting excuses I suggest giving a free pass to betray at will. Betrayers must be held 100% accountable for their actions. This should take a positive path.

Second, I agree with full disclosure, full transparency, full exposure, STD testing... get every thing out on the table and sweep nothing under the rug so nothing new comes up later.

Third, on the assumption you want to try and live through this, take whatever steps are necessary, both individually and together, to minimize this doesn't happen again. 

Fourth, set up a long term system of accountability for her. It only gets easier the next time.

Fifth, I do like the idea of time away from each other to fully reassess whether or not this relationship should continue- from both of you.

Best of luck.


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## AngryandUsed

Sorry OP,

I dont believe it was just ONS, although drunken.
Could it be many night stands?


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## Bobby5000

If I were in the situation and she was genuinely remorseful and wanted to change, I believe I could get over it and perhaps it could make you closer. And candidly while you can't say you'd forgive and forget, you can't spend the right of your marriage harping on one thing. She has to deal with her alcohol issue and she does have to understand you have a right to monitor her activities a little more carefully. 

You have two children an a household and you don't just create two households, change your role of father to participant in bi-weekly visitation, and use whatever savings you have and give it to lawyers. `


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## JCD

OP isn't coming back.


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## MrK

heartbrokensoul said:


> She says she cant remember much about it...


Of COURSE she can't.


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## heartbrokensoul

hi everyone i no the other guys name he is married and i no where he lives so he will be getting a nasty wakeup call very soon:lol:

she is getting an std check very soon and polygraph test i do believe her when she says its the first time because she nearly never goes out without me drunk and this is the first time she has come home the next day so drunk 

i was talking some people from the party who tell me my wife wive was so bad there they think she might have been spiked with some kind of drug which she is also being tested for

i no its a cop out to say she cant remember anything but i do believe her i cant remember much from the night before if i get that drunk and possibly drugge aldo i never cheated on her so idont no

when she dont drink she is the best person in the world and a great mother which i trust very much i just dont no if its enough to forgive her i defo need some time out to access the situation 

thanks very much for all the feedback this site helped me a lot im glad its here thanks again

slan abhaile


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## Rookie4

Dude , drinking is no excuse for anything. Remember that before you give her a pass card. An affair is an affair, whether it's a one-night, two-night or 300-night stand. The amount of sex makes no difference at all. Your wife is a cheater and betrayed you.......so what are you going to do about it?


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## sharkeey

JCD said:


> OP isn't coming back.


Gotta love it when people assume an Op has hit the road simply because they have a life outside the forums and just might be too busy to post for a period of less than 24 hours.


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## JCD

sharkeey said:


> Gotta love it when people assume an Op has hit the road simply because they have a life outside the forums and just might be too busy to post for a period of less than 24 hours.


What is this 'life' thing you are blathering about?

Next you'll be going on about the impropiaty of dispensing legal advice just because one was in a divorce! Nah!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## sharkeey

JCD said:


> Next you'll be going on about the impropiaty of dispensing legal advice just because one was in a divorce!


I'm convinced I know more about divorce than the attorneys do.


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## tom67

I hope you contact the omw today foget about talking to him go straight to talking to her.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## the guy

The drinking didn't make her do "it" your wife drinks cuz she is doing "it"!

I think she drinks to wash the guilt away, cuz this aint her 1st rodeo.

Her replies seem more comfortable then one would think....this being the one and only time she screwed around on you. I feel there wasn't a sense of being scared or afraid, but rather a reply thats is some what typical for her when she has to deal with her morning after walk of shame. 

Thats my $0.02


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## JCD

Well. Good luck with that. Personally I think you are rug sweeping, but it isn't my life.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Wiserforit

If she's an alcoholic, which doesn't require daily drinking by the way, she's got to reach rock bottom before she has the conviction to turn around.

Rock bottom is delayed by being too eager to forgive and sweep this under the rug. It is going to require a choice between alcohol and her marriage. 

For me I had the benefit of knowing I came from a long line of alcoholics. So when the time came where I was old enough to drink I was pretty quickly convinced I had the bug too so I just implemented a zero tolerance regime for myself instead of losing my job, my house, my wife, or killing someone on the road driving drunk. She was driving drunk, right? How about a manslaughter charge. Wouldn't that be cheery? With a big fine or lawsuit to bankrupt you too.


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## Entropy3000

heartbrokensoul said:


> Hi everyone im new here im just after a bit of advise
> hope ye can help
> ok so heres the story my wife of seven yrs 2 kids went out with some friends for drinks over the christmas.
> 
> i refused to go because my wife said she was drinking and any time we go out drinking together it always ends in a massive row
> i had promised to go until she said she was drinking(she gets very messy and dont no when enough is enough)
> 
> this upset her very much because we were not out together in a good while so she went without me the biggest regret ot my life
> 
> she did not return home until 7:30am which raised my suspicions quiet a bit
> 
> i waited a while until she was asleep and i checked her cell phone for evidence to my horror there was 3 messeges one from a strange number and 2 replys to same number
> 
> the message read like this... ye id let you do what ever you wanted to do to me xxx then she replyed to him il see. then she sent the last message at 7;15am saying nite nite.
> 
> i calmed myself down then went and woke my wife she denied everything saying her friend used her phone and **** but the last message she sent was after she got home so she was caught
> 
> she eventually confessed to sleeping with this guy back at a house party after she got waisted.She says she cant remember much about it either which i need answers to
> 
> she swears she will never drink again if i give her another chance we have so much to lose i dont no what to do
> 
> she is very remorsfull for her actions and it has hit her really hard she is so disgusted how can i for give the woman that i love for doing this to your family
> 
> do people think a one night stand is worse than an affair
> 
> sorry for such a long rant
> thanks for the replys in advance
> happy new year to everyone:smthumbup::smthumbup:


Completely unfaithful for her to go out and get wasted especially when you are not there. Why? Because she turns control over to random others by choice. That said I do not believe that being drunk is an excuse for anything. 

Now you should have gone of course. But you not going is not permission for her to stay out all night and screw around. Basically she was punishing you. THAT is controlling behavior.

I would not put up with a wife that got drunk out with her freinds ... period. Not this drunk. Even is she did not screw around. So this was a problem already. This would be a dealbreaker for me for sure. You are not me so I hope you are able to define what your boundaries really are.

Again not blaming you but you should not have accepted her going out like she did without you. You either should have gone or told her that her going without you to get this drunk was unacceptable.

Expose this to the guys wife.


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## tom67

Entropy3000 said:


> Completely unfaithful for her to go out and get wasted especially when you are not there. Why? Because she turns control over to random others by choice. That said I do not believe that being drunk is an excuse for anything.
> 
> Now you should have gone of course. But you not going is not permission for her to stay out all night and screw around. Basically she was punishing you. THAT is controlling behavior.
> 
> I would not put up with a wife that got drunk out with her freinds ... period. Not this drunk. Even is she did not screw around. So this was a problem already. This would be a dealbreaker for me for sure. You are not me so I hope you are able to define what your boundaries really are.
> 
> Again not blaming you but you should not have accepted her going out like she did without you. You either should have gone or told her that her going without you to get this drunk was unacceptable.
> 
> Expose this to the guys wife.


And on top of all that you letting her get behind the wheel when you know she get's blasted when she drinks.


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## Shaggy

Do not warn or even mention to your wife that you are going to expose to the OMW. She will try to talk you out of it, or worse warn him.

Just contact her and expose.

As for the drink, if she did drink a spiked drink she would have been way out and not happily texting him even when she got home.

Sorry, but the choice to cheat was deliberately and consciously made by her. Perhaps helped along by the booze, but she knew what she was choosing, after all it wasn't rape.


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## Wazza

Shaggy said:


> As for the drink, if she did drink a spiked drink she would have been way out and not happily texting him even when she got home.


That was my thought also. 

My daughter had something slipped in her drink at a party once. She was with real friends, they looked after her and brought her home, undamaged thank goodness. And no way could she have texted. 

She has an idea who put the stuff in her drink, and she no longer associates with that person or any of his friends in any way. Will not even attend a party if they are invited.

If your wife ever has anything to do with these people, I would assume she either doesn't believe her drink was spiked, or doesn't see a problem if it happens again.

Look, maybe she is telling the truth, but she has a lot of incentive to lie. Be suspicious, because right now her story as you have reported it seems suspicious.


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## jim123

She was able to text him so I doubt the whole drink thing. People are covering for her.


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## heartbrokensoul

she was not drink drinking she got a taxi home ye i dont believe for a minute her drink was spiked and we talked before she went out and she said she was only going to drink a little so much for that

i do also believe her side of the story all do its probably toned down for my ears the bottom line is she cheated something i thought she could never do to me or the kids and i dont think there is any going back to the way it was every time i look at her i see them having sex so i think its time to kick her out and move on 

im not one to stir another mans porridge if you no what i mean


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## jim123

No question she is lying and toned down the story. Do ask her to leave and get control. Take time and decide from there. If you take her back, the friends must go too.


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## KanDo

heartbrokensoul said:


> she was not drink drinking she got a taxi home ye i dont believe for a minute her drink was spiked and we talked before she went out and she said she was only going to drink a little so much for that
> 
> i do also believe her side of the story all do its probably toned down for my ears the bottom line is she cheated something i thought she could never do to me or the kids and i dont think there is any going back to the way it was every time i look at her i see them having sex so i think its time to kick her out and move on
> 
> im not one to stir another mans porridge if you no what i mean


I can certainly understand your position and it was mine as well. However, take a little time to think about what you really want to do with your wife. Expose the POSOM as quickly as possible. Do the 180. Get yourself together.


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## OldWolf57

No matter what way you go, the friends STILL have to go.
If a friend think a friends drink been spiked and DON'T protect them, those are not friends.

Now, on the other hand, they was just looking for her to mess up to have something to gossip about, it's understandable. 

Also, as shaggy said, she was not to smashed to txt him after getting home.

Dude, I've floated above my physical body while blacked out, watching as I did things.


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## tom67

OldWolf57 said:


> No matter what way you go, the friends STILL have to go.
> If a friend think a friends drink been spiked and DON'T protect them, those are not friends.
> 
> Now, on the other hand, they was just looking for her to mess up to have something to gossip about, it's understandable.
> 
> Also, as shaggy said, she was not to smashed to txt him after getting home.
> 
> Dude, I've floated above my physical body while blacked out, watching as I did things.


Heart take your time I'm glad she took a cab. Do a polygraph.


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## smethjoso

Listen to them. They know what works.


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## Goldmember357

leave


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## Summer4744

Heartbroken soul.

If you had not caught her that morning, how do you think she would have reacted when sober?

Regretfull and full of remorse? Would she have told you?

Would she have kept the A going? Would she have just treated it as a fun little diversion and never told you?


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## Rookie4

OP, what the posters are saying is absolutely right. If she was sober enough to text him when she got home, she was sober enough to have refused to f**k him, in the first place. She is trying to play you, bigtime.


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## JCD

Well she certainly remembers enough to thank him for the fvck.


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## walkonmars

The plans both of you made for the future,your vision for your old age together have changed. You need to take a lot time to come to terms with how her infidelity has affected not only you but your family.

It's like a person who has been running a marathon in the middle of a marathon discovering that something is very wrong with his legs. 

He shouldn't keep running. Not until he finds out how badly the legs are. He may elect to limp to the end, try to repair the damage, or just stop and change what he does.

Take a lot of time.


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