# Wife Really Let Me Down



## Holding Pattern (Dec 31, 2009)

I am furious. I have had some health issues lately that has required hospitalization and lots of testing - I have had some pain and missed some work. Every minute of it, I was well aware how pay and everything else was affected.
She has had a drinking problem for a while now but with the health problems it has gotten so much worse. She is obliterated just about every night then she becomes verbally abusive, physically confrontational, and knows exactly what buttons to push. 
On top of that she admits she has 'shut down' she does very little around the house anymore, is content to 'dress down' which I won't even go into - it is embarrassing to see her look like hell.
Tonight I am running a fever and she wouldn't even decide what to make for dinner - so after a fight - I ended up making dinner which she didn't even eat. So now she has a half a bottle of vodka in her system and nothing to absorb it.
I am in for a fun evening...
I just feel cold. I can't imagine being by myself but together is becoming more miserable.


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## hurtwife (May 21, 2010)

Not really sure what to say, but just wanted to say I hope you feel better. Just try and work on the positives I guess. Sorry I wasnt much help


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## braveheart2009 (Mar 25, 2009)

get rid of the alcohol and save your marriage mate. Her actions can't be held accountable as her mind is somewhere else imo.


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## Damselfish (May 21, 2010)

Your wife is dealing with a lot of emotion, albeit not in a good way. She is probably scared of your health problems and worried she's going to loose you, some how. She's projecting her fear on you and that is NOT okay. Not THIS way.

I have used alcohol in the past in my marriage to deal with "issues," too. I did a lot of the things you describe in your marriage. 

I suggest you contact your local al-anon. My husband has been going for almost a year now. I've seen the change in him! I have worked on the "whys" and have gotten beyond the drinking. But he still looks forward to and goes to these meetings every week and gets so much out of them - life enhancing support, and I am so glad for him. For us. 

I do hope you get well soon. Keep us posted, please.

Damsel


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## pinkprincess (Jun 10, 2008)

Damselfish said:


> Your wife is dealing with a lot of emotion, albeit not in a good way. She is probably scared of your health problems and worried she's going to loose you, some how. She's projecting her fear on you and that is NOT okay. Not THIS way.
> 
> I agree with this, your wife may be dealing with a lot emotionally and she is more than likely scraed for you, but as your wife and part of the marriage vows you took ïn sickness and in health"she needs to get a grib and be strong for YOU....
> 
> ...


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