# A Public Service Announcement for Remorseless Cheaters



## Truthseeker1 (Jul 17, 2013)

A Public Service Announcement for Remorseless Cheaters

January 21, 2016 by Chump Lady

Dear Cheaters,

Apparently there is still some confusion out there that your extracurricular shenanigans are wrong. In the interest of members of the unsuspecting public that may hook up, marry, or have children with you, the following PSA is offered.

1. You aren’t “edgy.” You think we lack the sophistication and intellect to understand your complicated love rhombus. On the contrary. You lack the intellect to keep both your security clearance and your pants on. Cheating on your spouse doesn’t make you special, misunderstood, or star crossed. It makes you rather embarrassing.

2. Quit with your Darwinian theories already. We didn’t evolve to be monogamous? Well, we didn’t evolve to do a lot of things. Farm. Use indoor plumbing. Buy sequined crap on QVC. And yet we manage. Why is it that you blame your primal self for infidelity, yet are quite adept at technologies such as placing personal ads on Craigslist? Why point to the reptilian part of your brain as an excuse for boinking whomever you want to? When the spouse of that person comes after you with a shotgun, neither you nor the court of law will be much impressed with the argument that the reptilian part of his brain would like to splatter your guts on the sidewalk.

3. Admit that you like the deceit. Come on, it’s a high. Playing hooky is a lot more fun than getting a day off from school. Everyone there in the classroom, playing by the rules, listening to a boring lecture on the continental Congress, while you smoke dope behind the bleachers. Renegade! The secrecy and lies are what gives the frisson of danger to your affair and make it so delicious. Otherwise you would have an open marriage, same rules for everyone. But no, the power imbalance is what you’re after. You enjoy a position of advantage over your trusting partner. They’re at home, devoting their energies to you and your home life, faithful to the wonderfulness that is you. Sweet gig you got there — and you know it.

(read the rest here)


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## 5Creed (May 29, 2011)

I wish my STBX could see this as it describes his thinking very well!


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## Truthseeker1 (Jul 17, 2013)

5Creed said:


> I wish my STBX could see this as it describes his thinking very well!


It's incredible how similar cheaters are to one another isn't it? Not special snowflakes at all....


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## 5Creed (May 29, 2011)

LOL! No; not so special at all! Another point is there are other people going through the same crap and they got through it so I can too~


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## Nomorebeans (Mar 31, 2015)

OMG. 4 and 6. All day long. And I lurve the line in 7 that goes, "People who lack empathy synapses and introspection - we call those people sociopaths."

My ex's favorite thing to do is make excuses for why he's such a selfish pr!ck, usually at others' expense. His latest ploy in this game is to compare other husbands' flaws that do not include cheating unfavorably to his own. Because fvcking another woman repeatedly outside our marriage (when we didn't have an open marriage agreement), lying to me about it, and leaving me for her is soooooo much better than putting on 40 pounds or golfing all the time instead of helping with the kids.


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

Nomorebeans said:


> OMG. 4 and 6. All day long. And I lurve the line in 7 that goes, "People who lack empathy synapses and introspection - we call those people sociopaths."
> 
> My ex's favorite thing to do is make excuses for why he's such a selfish pr!ck, usually at others' expense. His latest ploy in this game is to compare other husbands' flaws that do not include cheating unfavorably to his own. Because fvcking another woman repeatedly outside our marriage (when we didn't have an open marriage agreement), lying to me about it, and leaving me for her is soooooo much better than putting on 40 pounds or golfing all the time instead of helping with the kids.


LOL. I wonder how OW reacts when he starts poking fun at others' weight.


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## Truthseeker1 (Jul 17, 2013)

5Creed said:


> LOL! No; not so special at all! Another point is there are other people going through the same crap and they got through it so I can too~


It is a road many have traveled - which is why when a BS comes here and thinks they are alone or their situation is unque - others bring them around to realize your cheating spouse is as rare as roaches in a garbage dump...


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## Truthseeker1 (Jul 17, 2013)

Nomorebeans said:


> OMG. 4 and 6. All day long. And I lurve the line in 7 that goes, "People who lack empathy synapses and introspection - we call those people sociopaths."
> 
> My ex's favorite thing to do is make excuses for why he's such a selfish pr!ck, usually at others' expense. His latest ploy in this game is to compare other husbands' flaws that do not include cheating unfavorably to his own. Because fvcking another woman repeatedly outside our marriage (when we didn't have an open marriage agreement), lying to me about it, and leaving me for her is soooooo much better than putting on 40 pounds or golfing all the time instead of helping with the kids.


Wow your ex sounds like a real catch..not...

I also love this line - "It is understandable that you want to think of yourself as a good person. Our character, however, is made up of our actions. " - cheaters need to wrestle wiht that one - I can not tell you how many times I've read elsewhere - when cheaters go unchallenged how they have to add "I'm a good person, this doesn't define me" - for at least a certain period in your life you were a POS...and you damaged other people probably for life...nice going you "good person"


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## azteca1986 (Mar 17, 2013)

> If your marriage is truly awful and sexless and *your love language is seething passive aggression*


Loved this


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## Truthseeker1 (Jul 17, 2013)

azteca1986 said:


> Loved this


Chump lady does have a way with words doesn't she? :grin2:


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## Truthseeker1 (Jul 17, 2013)

azteca1986 said:


> Loved this


I also loved how she wrote "admit it you liked the deceit" - that cuts to the very heart of infidelity - its fun for the cheaters and they got off on it - while the affair was going on they were having a blast -during the fallout - not so much.....

If cheaters are truthful to their BSs they will admit - I did it and I liked it - a lot - but the bill I now have to pay is a bit steep and I'm not wanting to pay it - most never do....


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## TaDor (Dec 20, 2015)

Well... I bombed my facebook and therefore my wife's FB page about the affair. I told my side of what happened, along with photo and screen shoots, proving of their actions, etc.. even a bit of video too.
I wasn't going to let HER pretend she simply broke up with me and started dating this OM. Some friends were upset... "man, it makes you look like a sore loser, or angry".

Screw that! She lied behind my back, betrayed my trust - so NO, she doesn't get a free ride. Everyone in her family and friends got to see WHAT she DID to US for a loser. Just checked, that was about 420 friends on her list. These were messages behind my back, talking about sex and more. So what if some people got upset with me... get over it. My family unit was broken up by an affair!

Some said I was being vengeful, public shaming, should be private, causing her embarrassment. I said SO WHAT?! If she wants to be with the OM, then she should be PROUD of her actions. Hey, this is what she wanted... look, how slimy he is, compared to our baby. I even put the pics side by side.

The cheating spouse SHOULD ALWAYS be ashamed of what they have done. It was their choice to break a vow or an agreement... too bad. Live with it.


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## Truthseeker1 (Jul 17, 2013)

TaDor said:


> Well... I bombed my facebook and therefore my wife's FB page about the affair. I told my side of what happened, along with photo and screen shot proof of their actions, etc.. even a bit of video too.
> I wasn't going to let HER pretend she simply broke up with me and started dating this OM. Some friends were upset... "man, it makes you look like a sore loser, or angry".
> 
> Screw that! She lied behind my back, betrayed my trust - so NO, she doesn't get a free ride. Everyone in her family and friends got to see WHAT she DID to US for a loser. Just checked, that was about 420 friends on her list. These were messages behind my back, talking about sex and more. So what if some people got upset with me... get over it. My family unit was broken up by an affair!
> ...


Good for you!! Isn't that precious - you were causing HER embarrassment? It should be private? I love how cheaters run around betray, devastate and scar their BS but when it comes to their paying the price - now certain rules of decorum have to be observed? Fvck that - when you get hit you hit back...your ex deserves a public shaming there should ber MORE public shaming over infidelity That is why I love @chumplady - she descries cheaters in the most accurate light possible - no rainbows and unicorns...none!


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## Truthseeker1 (Jul 17, 2013)

azteca1986 said:


> Loved this


I liked this post form one of the ocmmenters on the article: 

_"I understand the frustration and anger, but oddly enough..as one of the few here who actually did bury her cheater in a hole in the ground with actual dirt and rocks; I wouldn’t have chosen it.

If I had known the full truth while he was alive, I would have cried & screamed, gone NC, told the world what he did and I hated him, rubbed poison ivy in the crotch of his underwear, taken him for every dime I could and hoped that he and Jesus made peace but I would have never hurt him.

*I consider the fact that my life is better with him dead as an example of the exquisite tragedy that his life was and that speaks volumes.*"_

The highlighted really hits home - the fact that you are better off without them speaks volumes about their life and not yours and BSs need to remember this!!


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## TaDor (Dec 20, 2015)

@Truthseeker1 : When I exposed my WW with the posts, it meant she was outed to her friends, family and co-workers. But she also has the ability to remove those from her timeline, but she decided to leave them up - because it was what she did.

Then she later posted on her timeline about the AP and their "boss"/his room-mate as he was still pursuing my wayward. It was to expose him and the business owner, their friends and family about their actions. Her ex-boss, wanted them to be a couple for their own sick motives. My Wayward was their best employee and with the two of them being an "item" - sales and productivity improved, etc. So why not give them a place to stay as well?!

We don't know the whole truth of why - doesn't matter anymore, but that post drove the point home for them and got the AP and the people he associates with out of her life.


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