# Question for those guys who use Tinder



## SMG15 (May 23, 2015)

I seem to get stuck after I get a match. Never know what to say first once we are matched. I usually start off with a compliment on their pics and sometimes the conversation never takes off from there

Why the hell would someone click yes on my tinder page and not talk to me???????????


----------



## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good evening
I don't know tinder, but does it include information on peoples interests? If so you can start a discussion on that:

Her profile: Hobbies - wrestling polar bears

You: Wrestling polar bears sounds cool. How did you get started? I've never tried, I live in Honolulu where we don't have polar bears, but they look pretty huge - how do you do it. Around here we do shark wrestling, maybe that is sort of similar.


----------



## SecondTime'Round (Jan 15, 2015)

A former boss of mine told me her go-to conversation starter is, "So what's keeping you busy these days?"


----------



## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

Just like apps that help you cheat at Words with Friends, you'll need to download FireStarter (not available on all mobile platforms). It is an app that automatically engages contacts using your profile and artificial intelligence and then gives you a notification once you have a "live one!"










Odds are that those clicking yes on your page also have the app (or similar one installed) that queues up dates automatically. So just think of it as a robocall where the phone rings, but then a live person is never able to answer and the call gets dropped.

Cheers, 
Badsanta


----------



## DayOne (Sep 19, 2014)

SMG15 said:


> Why the hell would someone click yes on my tinder page and not talk to me???????????


Maybe they work for the USPS? Or in a warehouse?...


----------



## Fozzy (Jul 20, 2013)

badsanta said:


> Just like apps that help you cheat at Words with Friends, you'll need to download FireStarter (not available on all mobile platforms). It is an app that automatically engages contacts using your profile and artificial intelligence and then gives you a notification once you have a "live one!"
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Why not just have the apps date each other? They could have robo-phone sex and save everyone time!


----------



## SMG15 (May 23, 2015)

DayOne said:


> Maybe they work for the USPS? Or in a warehouse?...


stop posting


----------



## WonkyNinja (Feb 28, 2013)

Fozzy said:


> Why not just have the apps date each other? They could have robo-phone sex and save everyone time!


No chance. I'm not risking my Android phone ending up with some dumbed down Siri who just wants to hook up and try pseudo-witty comments. :smile2:


----------



## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

SMG15 said:


> stop posting


Poor SMG... still having problems finding the perfect date before it gets too cold to go outside. I knew, even before I checked the thread, that you had started this one, too. How did I know? Because it is the same premise as ALL your dating threads... which eventually devolve into telling you that you need to relax, pay attention, don't get worked up over stupid things... and be respectful. Respectful, not only toward your date, but to the staff, as well as others around. 

You know, your attitude on here reminds me of a character I saw in a movie once. Actuslly, it was the lead in the movie Falling Down. You are volatile. I could see you snapping like that guy did. 

Anyway, the reason I quoted your post above... you tell people to stop posting all the time. Frankly, if you didn't post so much off the wall nonsense, you probably wouldn't get quips like DayOne's. You won't stop, though. You THRIVE on the drama you start. That became apparent from the first post you made.


----------



## karazy (Aug 31, 2015)

Start meeting people in real life.


----------



## BradWesley (May 24, 2013)

Fozzy said:


> Why not just have the apps date each other? They could have robo-phone sex and save everyone time!


WOW - Just imagine what an electronic STD would do to your device!!!


----------



## toonaive (Dec 13, 2012)

Maricha75 said:


> Poor SMG... still having problems finding the perfect date before it gets too cold to go outside. I knew, even before I checked the thread, that you had started this one, too. How did I know? Because it is the same premise as ALL your dating threads... which eventually devolve into telling you that you need to relax, pay attention, don't get worked up over stupid things... and be respectful. Respectful, not only toward your date, but to the staff, as well as others around.
> 
> You know, your attitude on here reminds me of a character I saw in a movie once. Actuslly, it was the lead in the movie Falling Down. You are volatile. I could see you snapping like that guy did.
> 
> Anyway, the reason I quoted your post above... you tell people to stop posting all the time. Frankly, if you didn't post so much off the wall nonsense, you probably wouldn't get quips like DayOne's. You won't stop, though. You THRIVE on the drama you start. That became apparent from the first post you made.


----------



## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

SecondTime'Round said:


> A former boss of mine told me her go-to conversation starter is, "So what's keeping you busy these days?"


The only correct response to that is, "Hopefully it will be you!"


----------



## DayOne (Sep 19, 2014)

Maricha75 said:


> You know, your attitude on here reminds me of a character I saw in a movie once. Actuslly, it was the lead in the movie Falling Down. You are volatile. I could see you snapping like that guy did.


If you're worried about him going 'postal', I think his other thread made it clear that's not going to happen. Given his aversion to becoming a mail carrier in the first place....


Edit: or having any kind of job.


----------



## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

karazy said:


> Start meeting people in real life.


He does... it rarely gets to date 2. And even more rare for it to go to date 3.


----------



## BetrayedDad (Aug 8, 2013)

I used to go through their photos and comments on something interesting. 

**Posing with her dog**

Me: Cute dog what breed is it?

Pretty good success rate with that. Then you can run with it. Usually the formula is small talk > get to know questions > sprinkle in some humor > ask to meet up for a drink.

Spread it out over a few days then ask to meet. If you ask same day or wait more than a week they are usually long gone. I had the best success waiting a couple days before asking to meet up.

Some girls do swipe right and never respond. A lot of them are on there JUST for the ego boost. It's a numbers game so just keep swiping. Plenty of legit ones.

Good Luck.


----------



## Mr. Nail (Apr 26, 2011)

@SMG15 ,
This is actually a very good thread for you. You aren't looking to stir up fights, and you are asking for specific advice. I must admit that I was tempted to talk to you about fire starting supplies. 

Bad Santa's information about an app to do your texting for you really worries me. It seems so hard to actually meet genuine people online. This kind of thing often takes a lot of failures before you find a success.


----------



## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

SMG15 said:


> Why the hell would someone click yes on my tinder page and not talk to me???????????


Because she also clicked "yes" on 45 other dudes and she doesn't have time to talk to all of them, so you fell to the bottom of the pile.


----------



## SMG15 (May 23, 2015)

Maricha75 said:


> Poor SMG... still having problems finding the perfect date before it gets too cold to go outside. I knew, even before I checked the thread, that you had started this one, too. How did I know? Because it is the same premise as ALL your dating threads... which eventually devolve into telling you that you need to relax, pay attention, don't get worked up over stupid things... and be respectful. Respectful, not only toward your date, but to the staff, as well as others around.
> 
> You know, your attitude on here reminds me of a character I saw in a movie once. Actuslly, it was the lead in the movie Falling Down. You are volatile. I could see you snapping like that guy did.
> 
> Anyway, the reason I quoted your post above... you tell people to stop posting all the time. Frankly, if you didn't post so much off the wall nonsense, you probably wouldn't get quips like DayOne's. You won't stop, though. You THRIVE on the drama you start. That became apparent from the first post you made.



I changed photos and now can't get any messages. I hate depending on free dating sites to meet women which means I may have to find another pay site.


----------



## SMG15 (May 23, 2015)

Faithful Wife said:


> Because she also clicked "yes" on 45 other dudes and she doesn't have time to talk to all of them, so you fell to the bottom of the pile.


Good Point


----------



## SMG15 (May 23, 2015)

Personal said:


> Perhaps he'd have more success dating masochists.


I got to a 2nd date in August but after that she went out of town which killed the momentum


----------



## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

SMG15 said:


> I got to a 2nd date in August but after that she went out of town which killed the momentum


No... what killed it was your suggestion about coming over to your place to have dinner, cuddle, and watch TV or a movie. She said she wasn't ready for that. You moved TOO fast. Had you waited until she got back, you might have gotten dates 3... 4... 5... Hey, you might be in date 10 by now.


----------



## SMG15 (May 23, 2015)

Maricha75 said:


> No... what killed it was your suggestion about coming over to your place to have dinner, cuddle, and watch TV or a movie. She said she wasn't ready for that. You moved TOO fast. Had you waited until she got back, you might have gotten dates 3... 4... 5... Hey, you might be in date 10 by now.



I sent that because I figured it was over and I had nothing to lose

Remember she rarely contacted me first to say good morning or called first. So I never felt the interest so I no longer cared what she was offended by.

Once I feel someone is just using me for free dinner I put a stop to it


----------



## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

SMG15 said:


> I sent that because I figured it was over and I had nothing to lose
> 
> Remember she rarely contacted me first to say good morning or called first. So I never felt the interest so I no longer cared what she was offended by.
> 
> *Once I feel someone is just using me for free dinner I put a stop to it*


You ASSUME they are using you. In reality, you have a hard time discerning, as evidenced in many of your own posts here.


----------



## SMG15 (May 23, 2015)

Maricha75 said:


> You ASSUME they are using you. In reality, you have a hard time discerning, as evidenced in many of your own posts here.


One clue is never initiating contact


----------



## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

SMG15 said:


> One clue is never initiating contact


Unless she was socially awkward, or nervous. You still made an assumption. And you can't handle when things don't go the way you want them. Perhaps she wasn't really into you. And perhaps she was... and what you did killed any chance with her. The biggest problem, as many of us see it, is you. You get irritated and annoyed over the simplest little things. Throw in how you treat your mother (and it is possible any one of them found out), and I can understand how these ladies feel.


----------



## SMG15 (May 23, 2015)

Maricha75 said:


> Unless she was socially awkward, or nervous. You still made an assumption. And you can't handle when things don't go the way you want them. Perhaps she wasn't really into you. And perhaps she was... and what you did killed any chance with her. The biggest problem, as many of us see it, is you. You get irritated and annoyed over the simplest little things. Throw in how you treat your mother (and it is possible any one of them found out), and I can understand how these ladies feel.



How I treat my mother??


----------



## FeministInPink (Sep 13, 2012)

SMG15 said:


> One clue is never initiating contact


Not necessarily. For example, I tend to be an over-communicator, which I have learned may make me appear needy or clingy, when in fact I am just easily excited. So I have learned to NOT be the one to initiate (daily) contact, preferring to let the guy set the pace, so as not to blow up his phone.

The more he initiates contact, the more comfortable I will be initiating myself.


----------



## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

SMG15 said:


> How I treat my mother??


SMG, have you forgotten that I have been around since the first or maybe second thread you started? You ignore her on a regular basis. You don't like when her texts are the first you see in the morning. And I recall another thread where you went to lunch with her and got annoyed with her for sticking up for the waitress you believed to be incompetent. It wouldn't be hard for them to find out at all.


----------



## Mr The Other (Feb 1, 2014)

I used Tinder for a while. It worked well. 

You have probably got most of these points covered, but I will list all that comes to my mind.
1. Photos are the biggie. Get a professional shot. The other type worth doing are odd ones that show humour, my main one was dressed as a red coating, pointing with great intent at a blue egg spoon. It sets one apart.
2. Most people will go banal with the opening line, such as "How are you?", so do not bother. Go for a light joke or a song you are listening to, encourage a sing-a-long over Tinder.
3. This is controversial. Use similies and be dorky. The girl might well want to meet you, she is more likely to meet a harmless dork that someone to edgy. Save edgy for when you are meeting in real life.
4. Lots of girls just go on there for a giggle and to see if they will get replies. Do not fret that.


----------

