# How many dates before you had sex after your separation or divorce?



## Cobalt




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## SamuraiJack

I picked up a FWB.
Truly the best gift a person can get theselves. 

My current GF and I had sex on our fourth date.


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## toolforgrowth

SamuraiJack said:


> I picked up a FWB.
> Truly the best gift a person can get theselves.
> 
> My current GF and I had sex on our fourth date.


I did the exact same thing. Picked up a FWB, totally helped my self esteem, and had sex with my current GF on the fourth date.

I'm really hoping that I don't have a split personality that is exactly like me...:rofl:


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## Holland

I had a FWB and was also casually dating others when I felt like it.

When Mr H and I met we had sex on the second date and became exclusive not long after. I moved on from my FWB and we both removed our online profiles that week. Have been together for 3 amazing, challenging and love filled years now. Still having sex daily or more.


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## Married but Happy

I was in no rush with the women I dated, but I guess they were! Almost all of them initiated sex on the second date (a few on the third). A couple weren't relationship-compatible, but we agreed to continue a while as FWB.


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## arbitrator

*My vote is solely predicated upon my second separation/divorce from my rich, skanky XW. 


Last remembered sex with her was on February 28, 2011~ "her birthday" sex
"Trial Separation" requested by her in first week of March, to begin in Mid-May
Separation officially effected on May 21, 2011
Divorced finalized on October 23, 2013
Chose not to date during the separation/divorce process for legal reasons
Have only had 4 "dates," all from eH and POF since, but sensed no real connection with any of them or vice-versa enough, to ever want to take them to the bedroom.

So, "still 'celibate' after all these years!"

In my first marriage however, I had sex with the second gal that I dated, not all that long after the divorce had been officially finalized.*


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## samyeagar

Holland said:


> I had a FWB and was also casually dating others when I felt like it.
> 
> When Mr H and I met we had sex on the second date and became exclusive not long after. I moved on from my FWB and we both removed our online profiles that week. Have been together for 3 amazing, challenging and love filled years now. Still having sex daily or more.


Didn't do the FWB thing. Not my style, but like you, my wife and I slept together early into our second date, removed our profile within the week, and it's been a fantastic almost three years since.


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## COguy

toolforgrowth said:


> I did the exact same thing. Picked up a FWB, totally helped my self esteem, and had sex with my current GF on the fourth date.
> 
> I'm really hoping that I don't have a split personality that is exactly like me...:rofl:


Post-split I was introduced to the wonderful world of a "soft harem." Quite fun....

Current GF and I had sex on our fourth date. Most of the girls were 2-3, though now I think I could get that average down to 1 or 2.


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## COguy

arbitrator said:


> my rich, skanky XW.


How rich and how skanky? Does she need a pool boy? Can I get her #?


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## SamuraiJack

COguy said:


> How rich and how skanky? Does she need a pool boy? Can I get her #?


I dont think you want to get in with her. From what Arb says it sounds like she has been ridden more times than a pony at the state fair.


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## Satya

FWB is great for some, but not for me. For my first LTR after divorce (2.5 years post), I didn't have sex until 4 months into the relationship. That may be too long for some, but I was up front with the guy from the start and he was OK with my boundaries. In fact, I think his aligned well. I wasn't interested in the act so much as knowing the person was the right fit emotionally and intellectually. And I'm no prude... You'll just have to believe me on that.  I simply knew what was important to me. 

We were great in many respects, but we simply had different ideas for the future, so it wasnt going to work out. He was an upstanding bloke. 

My current relationship... We connected emotionally/intellectually much faster than my previous relationship, simply because we had more in common and we meshed more easily. Our schedules also permitted us to see each other more often and we all know how important quality time is. 

It's hard to remember precisely how many "dates" we had before we had sex (likely because one of those nights my head had nearly popped off and I'm sure there was some memory loss that resulted... Ahem) but if my memory is at all reliable, I'd say it was at least 4-5 encounters before we bonded. 

I think there is no correct answer here, as there have been many different responses. You will simply "know" when the time is right for you.


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## bkyln309

I dated a few men and had no intimate relations. But the current guy and I went for it at date 4 and I have no regrets. But he is talking long term so its all good for now.


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## 'CuseGal

Dating? Sex? What's that? 10 years post split here and I've had neither except in a few pathetic attempts to reconcile with the ex. Wish I could figure out how to start again.


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## arbitrator

COguy said:


> How rich and how skanky? Does she need a pool boy? Can I get her #?


*Rich, skanky XW had a rather nice swimming pool at her old digs, but not at her current one. 

And I'd have to say that if there is one there, it would have to be in her bedroom whenever she spreads her legs; but you may encounter some problems as she already has a brand new fiance in tow to help chlorinate it for her!

But given her natural propensity to cheat, you might well stand a decent chance!*


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## COguy

arbitrator said:


> *Rich, skanky XW had a rather nice swimming pool at her old digs, but not at her current one.
> 
> And I'd have to say that if there is one there, it would have to be in her bedroom whenever she spreads her legs; but you may encounter some problems as she already has a brand new fiance in tow to help chlorinate it for her!
> 
> But given her natural propensity to cheat, you might well stand a decent chance!*


Even better...sex AND blackmail money!


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## Chuck71

SamuraiJack said:


> I dont think you want to get in with her. From what Arb says it sounds like she has been ridden more times than a pony at the state fair.


I thought she had rode more people than Greyhound.... 

and my fav.... she has screwed more people than the IRS


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## Chuck71

Most LaD readers kinda know my backstory with my 4 so here goes

1st love..... 1st date (we were in high school)

2nd love... 3rd date (week after we met)

3rd love / XW.... 2nd date

4th love.... 1st date (yeah kind of a red flag in some ways)


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## Dread Pirate Roberts

Moved out in June 2013. Didn't date anybody for a long time - maybe 9-10 months. Couple of dates, and slept with one of them, which I didn't enjoy at all. Current girlfriend, on date number six. That was 7 months ago, and we are still going strong.

DPR


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