# How to be persuasive to have sex tonight!



## Mrs$ (Aug 13, 2021)

My hubby is respectful, almost to a fault! I need to feel him up inside me tonight but need to make him realize that without coming across as slutty? Im always afraid he is trying to be so polite and not offend me by doing something really sexy ie naughty but I really want to feel something like that tonight! How do I let him knowI want to do something different that the norm?


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

My wife jumped on top of me last night in her panties that did it.


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## AC2021 (Aug 9, 2021)

Mrs$ said:


> My hubby is respectful, almost to a fault! I need to feel him up inside me tonight but need to make him realize that without coming across as slutty? Im always afraid he is trying to be so polite and not offend me by doing something really sexy ie naughty but I really want to feel something like that tonight! How do I let him knowI want to do something different that the norm?


Please come across slutty. That's what works every single time. Men crave that so don't be shy. If he doesnt respond then it's his job to adjust. 
Try very red lipstick, some perfume, stockings and heels. Take your time walking towards him and then grab his hardening **** and do what you wish to do.. Rest will happen by itself.


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## Mrs$ (Aug 13, 2021)

I am a pretty dominant person, due to years in a male dominated profession. Hubby will always be receptive, but Im wanting to introduce something different to our lovemaking. Thanks for the positive reinforcement! Im a little shy in asking for what I want in this case.


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## Mrs$ (Aug 13, 2021)

ccpowerslave said:


> My wife jumped on top of me last night in her panties that did it.


I bet!! Your wife must know what she likes and isnt shy about going after it! You two sound very healthy that way! Thanks for commenting!


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## Talker67 (Apr 7, 2016)

what is wrong with slutty???


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## Mrs$ (Aug 13, 2021)

Talker67 said:


> what is wrong with slutty???


behind the doors of our bedroom there is nothing wrong for sure. Im just having a hard time breaching the topic of something different and am a little bashful or ashamed.


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## Baby Fark McGee-Zax (Aug 14, 2021)

Mrs$ said:


> My hubby is respectful, almost to a fault! I need to feel him up inside me tonight but need to make him realize that without coming across as slutty? Im always afraid he is trying to be so polite and not offend me by doing something really sexy ie naughty but I really want to feel something like that tonight! How do I let him knowI want to do something different that the norm?


Just tell him straight out. There is nothing wrong with coming across as "slutty" when it comes to having sex with your own spouse. I can't think of a better way to say this as I just flat out suck at diplomacy, so here goes: if you're mature enough to have sex, then you're mature enough to discuss sex. If you and your husband can't openly talk about it and ask for what you want/say what you don't like, you have a much bigger problem that will only get worse over time.


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

Mrs$ said:


> I bet!! Your wife must know what she likes and isnt shy about going after it! You two sound very healthy that way! Thanks for commenting!


To be honest if she comes to bed with just panties on even without jumping on top of me then I’m like this:


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## CharlieParker (Aug 15, 2012)

Do you want to peg him? Give him a "back rub", after that it is easier to ask for forgiveness than for permission.


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

Mrs$ said:


> I am a pretty dominant person, due to years in a male dominated profession. Hubby will always be receptive, but Im wanting to introduce something different to our lovemaking. Thanks for the positive reinforcement! Im a little shy in asking for what I want in this case.


My wife will take off her robe slowly across the bed while keeping eye contact with me and a sly little smile. Then she starts slowly crawling across the bed like a lioness about puonce on a wildebeast.


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

And our bed is a "No Clothing Zone"....
Because Daddy said! It leads to sex more often and we both sleep better. Buy a devet as it breathes better than a comforter. It is warm but also cooler so you dont get all sweaty at night. Nude+devet=more sex and better sleep.


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## Rus47 (Apr 1, 2021)

Mrs$ said:


> My hubby is respectful, almost to a fault! *I need to feel him up inside me tonight but need to make him realize that* without coming across as slutty? Im always afraid he is trying to be so polite and not offend me by doing something really sexy ie naughty but I really want to feel something like that tonight! How do I let him know I want to do something different that the norm?


How about start by telling him exactly what you wrote. And nothing a wife does for or to to her husband is "slutty", just get that word out of your vocabulary and out of your head. Tell him exactly what you crave and show him how you want it. He will be one ecstatic husband, may have been waiting for you to let him know. The only problem you may have is helping him to slow down and last long with something brand new. Round 2 may be essential.  

99.99% of men are down for whatever their wife wants to do with them.


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## Talker67 (Apr 7, 2016)

Mrs$ said:


> behind the doors of our bedroom there is nothing wrong for sure. Im just having a hard time breaching the topic of something different and am a little bashful or ashamed.


i have news for you, we ALL are a little bashful in that regard. But acting sexy, dressing sexy, is what helps get hubby's brain off of history channel reruns, and onto your breasts instead!

go for it.


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## Talker67 (Apr 7, 2016)

Divinely Favored said:


> And our bed is a "No Clothing Zone"....
> Because Daddy said! It leads to sex more often and we both sleep better. Buy a devet as it breathes better than a comforter. It is warm but also cooler so you dont get all sweaty at night. Nude+devet=more sex and better sleep.


one thing that is incredibly sexy, wear short skirts around the house, and NO PANTIES. a thin blouse with no bra underneath is a giant help too. not too many men would not get hard when they find out what you are not wearing!

another sure fire thing, a short dress with one of those big obvious zippers right on the front. his mind is just going to think all day long about pulling that zipper down all the way!


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## HappilyMarried1 (Jul 21, 2021)

Here is a suggestion @Mrs$

If he is at work today send him a naughty text or email if he has a private email other than the work one. In the text or email tell him what you want to do to him or what you want him to do to you. That may help take care of what you said about being bashful or ashamed. Also, tell him you will be in something sexy and waiting for him to get home maybe even send him a sexy picture with the text or email. Thanks for posting this has now got me thinking. I think I may now go home and surprise my wife of 34 years with a little sexual surprise. Thanks again. Best of luck!


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## CatholicDad (Oct 30, 2017)

Sorry, but my thought is that if a man doesn’t clue in to even subtle innuendo- he’s either not that interested, using porn, or both.

Presuming he is healthy.


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## Mrs$ (Aug 13, 2021)

CatholicDad said:


> Sorry, but my thought is that if a man doesn’t clue in to even subtle innuendo- he’s either not that interested, using porn, or both.
> 
> Presuming he is healthy.


Interesting that this is what I conveyed. We have a very active sex life and rarely go more than a few days without being intimate with each other. Im just interested in doing something that we rarely do and am a little embarrassed to initiate that experience. Im sure he will be receptive its just a little hard to ask for. Thanks for the input.


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## Asterix (May 16, 2021)

Mrs$ said:


> My hubby is respectful, almost to a fault! I need to feel him up inside me tonight but need to make him realize that without coming across as slutty? Im always afraid he is trying to be so polite and not offend me by doing something really sexy ie naughty but I really want to feel something like that tonight! How do I let him knowI want to do something different that the norm?


I have a rhetorical question for you. How well do you know your husband?

The reason why I'm asking is that, I think it's unlikely that your husband is going to think of you as "slutty" for starting on the foreplay. Another thing I'd urge you to do is not to worry that other's MIGHT think of your actions as slutty because this might make you hold back maybe just a little and could shortchange your sex life. 

I don't know your husband, but I think it'd work wonders if you tell him exactly what you told us: "I need to feel him up inside me tonight". 

A lot of women act all prim and proper and wait for the partner to make a move. I'd suggest that you make the move first. I think it is exciting and arousing for a man to feel desired. A woman acting prim and proper and waiting for the partner to make a move does not always make a man feel desired. 

It's also possible that your husband is respectful because he's been taught throughout his life to be respectful towards others and especially woman. It is for you to let him know how you like "it". Maybe holding your hair firmly in his hand could float your and his boat? Ask for what you want .


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## Young at Heart (Jan 6, 2015)

Mrs$ said:


> My hubby is respectful, almost to a fault! I need to feel him up inside me tonight but need to make him realize that without coming across as slutty? Im always afraid he is trying to be so polite and not offend me by doing something really sexy ie naughty but I really want to feel something like that tonight! How do I let him knowI want to do something different that the norm?





Mrs$ said:


> I am a pretty dominant person, due to years in a male dominated profession. Hubby will always be receptive, but Im wanting to introduce something different to our lovemaking. Thanks for the positive reinforcement! Im a little shy in asking for what I want in this case.





Mrs$ said:


> behind the doors of our bedroom there is nothing wrong for sure. Im just having a hard time breaching the topic of something different and am a little bashful or ashamed.


Dear Mrs$;

I think you are making a mistake by saying you need something done tonight. You are likely going to create a confrontation.

Find a time, outside of the bedroom. to tell your H that you are a little embarrassed and feeling a little strange, but you need to tell him something important to you. Ask if you can do it say after dinner some night during the week.

That will get him curious. When the time comes tell him that you have been having some thoughts that you can't get our of your mind. Tell him that you want him to F your brains out (or you his) and that you were hoping that you could explore one of your sexual fantasies. Tell him that you are afraid to tell him what you want to do, but you love and trust him enough that you feel you should try sharing it. Tell him you don't want him to judge you because of what you share with him. Tell him he doesn't need to do what you want, but you would at least like to discuss it with him and you want him to think about it. 

If he is OK with it then schedule a time on another day to go do the sex act. If so, then you have gotten what you want at the expense of some bravery on your part and a little discomfort.

If he is absolutely against it, tell him that you want him to forget the two of you ever had this conversation and you won't bring it up again, unless he brings it up first. Thank him for listening and don't bring it up. You might be surprised in a few months after he has thought about it and perhaps done some research, if he doesn't bring it up again. Some folks feel threatened by "change" and need to internalize the change before they can act. 

Dr. David Schnarch likes to point out that most of us if you look at just about any sex act will think it is weird and probably a bit icky the first time we think about it. He recommends that people break such sex acts down into components and slowly work on each separate component until they are comfortable with it and then start putting multiple components together until the entire sex act happens. One of his tame examples is french kissing. On the surface exchanging saliva by rubbing tongues sounds pretty unsanitary. However after you have gotten use to closed mouth kissing and are comfortable with that, taking it to another level slowly, may not seem to bad. After a while you both will own that act of intimacy. He likes to add opening your eyes to do kissing while eyes open as a way of even further enhancing the act.

If H is unsure, tell him you appreciate his honesty and bravery. Ask him if he can explore what you would like by reading up on it or if you can provide him over the next few days some websites or material on what you would like to do. Schedule a time in a week or two to again talk about this, so he doesn't feel immediate pressure. If it would help him, let him know you can do it while role playing. If he is sort of OK with some aspects of what you want, but not others, then see if you can't do some portions or at least some aspects which create the illusion of what you want.

Role playing is a great way to pretend that it is not really you or your H who are doing something. You might be surprised how liberating wearing a mask or having one partner have the illusion of restraint can change one's mental ability to move outside of their comfort envelope. (Not sure what "kink" you are hoping for, but for some people instead of tying them up, just allowing them to loop something around their wrist and hold the end of the rope; can give the illusion of bondage without the fear.) Also if your H agrees to try something "different" make sure he has a couple of "safe words" one for absolute stop (I am freaking out) and a second for "things are getting a little uncomfortable, can you slow down and lighten up while I regain control of my feelings."

Good luck. Great sex should be playful and exploratory. Afterwards no matter what happens you might ask him if he has any secret fantasies you might help him explore. Again, no guarentees, as to if you will do it with him, but you won't judge him and if you aren't comfortable, you will see if there isn't a way to role play parts of it so he can explore his fantasies.


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## Mrs$ (Aug 13, 2021)

Young at Heart said:


> Dear Mrs$;
> 
> I think you are making a mistake by saying you need something done tonight. You are likely going to create a confrontation.
> 
> ...


Thank you so much for the thoughtful input! This particular thing I would like to do is something that we have done before and I dont think hubby is hung up about it and in fact from the past experience he will likely welcome the invitation. The only thing holding me back is likely my own preconceived image of something that I feel is dirty or naughty. I figure that it might not be a bad idea to reach down and guide him where I want him and see how receptive he is. If he pulls away I can always stop and not force the issue, the topic is uncomfortable for me to talk about so this might be the way to go. Thank you for your input!


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

I think it was the lead singer for Motley Crue said, "I want my woman to be a lady on my arm, and a ***** behind closed doors"

I agree with that, as do about all the male sex.


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## This too shell pass (Oct 1, 2021)

Mrs$ said:


> My hubby is respectful, almost to a fault! I need to feel him up inside me tonight but need to make him realize that without coming across as slutty? Im always afraid he is trying to be so polite and not offend me by doing something really sexy ie naughty but I really want to feel something like that tonight! How do I let him knowI want to do something different that the norm?


try going to bed without pantries..


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## farsidejunky (Mar 19, 2014)

CharlieParker said:


> Do you want to peg him? Give him a "back rub", after that it is easier to ask for forgiveness than for permission.


 Charlie letting the freak flag fly tonight...lol.

Sent from my Pixel 3 XL using Tapatalk


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## DLC (Sep 19, 2021)

All you need is to drop the slightest hint and you don’t even have to say it twice. A light touch, a little flirting
It’s like I love burgers, just the idea of having burger for dinner will get me home early. That’s all I am saying. 
Having said that, two things to mention. Follow through of what you suggested. Blue ball sucks, and if men comes up empty handed enough times, they won’t take the boat any more. 2nd, if you can’t even flirt with him, then there is a bigger problem than “don’t know tell him what you want”.


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## OLD GUY (12 mo ago)

Mrs$ said:


> My hubby is respectful, almost to a fault! I need to feel him up inside me tonight but need to make him realize that without coming across as slutty? Im always afraid he is trying to be so polite and not offend me by doing something really sexy ie naughty but I really want to feel something like that tonight! How do I let him know I want to do something different that the norm?


Tell him you want to be his ****! While in the bedroom, you both talk about your sexy thoughts. No judgments. You the internet & lookup at sex toys, stories, videos, etc. You both learn it's OK to go crazy. 
We are old now & we miss our sex life.


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