# Looking for misery,



## Shooboomafoo (Mar 30, 2011)

I think awhile back I posted that I had removed myself from my stbxw FB page. Well, I friended her again, and despite the impending Divorce, I mistakenly thought we could still be friends, as we were still going to parties, etc., and such but I guess as something "less than" a couple.? More for our daughters sake than for our own, but of course we both had many many mutual friends there too. 

Delusional thinking, and my extreme bad.

In fact I think it was yesterday that one of the last pictures remaining from her "glamour shots" taken and given to me in a special valentines day album finally made it onto facebook as her profile picture. Forget about anything being "sacred". 

Let the single dude's "likes" and "comments" ensue!, and they did. and I guess it makes her feel really good to get that kind of attention.

so I made a comment and she defriended me. LOL.

I guess the moral of this story is to at whatever costs refrain from digging at the scab? 

I was so sick of seeing her "victim" mentality posts and all her girlfriends soothing her pour wounded soul.

Wait a minute. Oh Yeah, it was you that cheated on me! and our family! 

See where this can go? It was like dredging up [email protected] that I was supposed to be getting over, and I made that mistake.

Beginning to box my stuff up for move out day. I dont even have a place to go yet. Finance Co. needs a copy of the decree signed by the "Black Robe of Justice", before they will "aye" or "nay" the application, and I am at a point of needing to go somewhere. I cant stay here in this house with her much longer if any longer at all. Plus, her mom is still here too. Awaiting me to leave, before she finally feels obligated to "help out" more with the $$$. 
Funny how you do someone so much help in their lives when really it wasnt any of your business to have to, and then when they could step up to plate and return the kindness, they are cold, calculating, and devoid of thoughtfulness in any regard.

Sometimes I feel myself thinking too much about it all, and that part of me that is beginning to develop that says, "dont go there, dont think about it, it will only bring you down" does seem to be getting stronger.

But man have I had my stumbles along the way.
Seeing her acting happy one day and laughing out loud as if life were fine, along with the poor-me victim mentality, makes a person want to "retort with great scorn". 

But it gets no where. Its only looking for misery.


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## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

Ouch shoo, that would hurt. Yes letting go is hard and takes time, but also realize that she is likely letting you see what she wants you to see, at some level she is hurt inside and definitely damaged and that is her way to express it, so there is no need to be passive-aggressive or even actively resentful - don't waste any effort thinking of the hurtful things she can do to you, life will dole out its consequences to everyone. Just keep doing what you know to be the right thing, do everything you can to avoid the misery.


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## caughtdreaming (May 30, 2011)

Shooboomafoo said:


> Funny how you do someone so much help in their lives when really it wasnt any of your business to have to, and then when they could step up to plate and return the kindness, they are cold, calculating, and devoid of thoughtfulness in any regard.


Oh I know, hilarious isn't it?



> Sometimes I feel myself thinking too much about it all, and that part of me that is beginning to develop that says, "dont go there, dont think about it, it will only bring you down"


This has started to become my personal mantra, a chant I repeat quite religiously.


The nerve of these people.


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