# Help hurt



## lmh24 (Mar 1, 2009)

We have been together for 16 years. He had a affair that lasted a month,told me about it, we were working it out even though it was hard on me. He just moved out and stated he needs time and space. That he needs to forget stuff that happen in the pass that he was keeping in,money issue,house problem and that affair which I think was a big issue. I have done everything for this guy I love him very much and its killing me inside but i think he did this cause of her or someone else. He tells me there is no other women he just needs time and space. I told him all the time and space is not going to let him forget the pass if he don't and we don't work out our issue together. I try to talk to him sometime and he get upset or just listens and don't respond. He has put up a wall. He has become a different person. When i spoke to his sister and his sister question him him got upset. I told her I think your brother is cheating again. We had a good sex life, we were friends and enjoyed each other. Everybody say he is going though a midlife crisis. I don't know whats going on with him. I want to work this out but he don't seem to want to for right now. He states he needs time. He say he loves me but not the same way,and that we should start over dating in time and if something rekindles than fine. I don't understand how u lose love for someone overnight? We talk and hang out but its not the same. I miss him. What is going on with him? What to do to get him to see and understand what he is doing? Right now he has more money issue and he is trying to find another job but right now it hard because it slow and no one is hiring. I think he needs counseling ,but he don't want it cause he said he don't need someone to tell him what he needs to do. Help me with this issue.


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## justean (May 28, 2008)

the thing is the more you fight for him and the more he knows it, hes on a win win situation. 
he can come back to you, because you have your arms open.
do the reverse psychology on him.
you want him back , you have to fight in a different way.
inside your mind.
dress up nice , make up , hair, as if your going out everynight of the week.
infact when you see him, walk out as he walks in. he doesnt have to be informed n e more of your whereabouts.
let him get the very lonely , OMG i could lose my wife syndrome.
this isnt a quick game and you have to bide your time. 
mine took 10 months, but i got my H back. 
you have to remind yourself you can both do whatever you want as your not together.
trying to make this easier for you, my H and we were split at the time - he met someone for a month. but where did it go, no where .
they werent meant to be.
we didnt get back straightaway , but if your meant to be , you wil.
you have to make him want you, just dont go to bed with him. 
you have to make the game harder for him.


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