# The questions from children.....



## Dedicated2Her (Nov 13, 2010)

There is no mistaking the emotional damage that divorce brings, on all sides. The betrayed spouse deals with the rejection and the loss of what they thought was real. The wayward deals with guilt and regret in so many forms. I firmly believe the betrayed spouse comes out on top, almost every single time. They are the one's that look inside and say, what can I do to be a better me? You go through process, and you get better. You even date. You meet a girl who is, on the surface, a very healthy individual as they were once a betrayed spouse themselves. This creates a common ground if both of you have done the work individually to become whole. 

Then, your children start to ask, "Who are you texting? Why are you smiling when you text? Is that a girl?" Tonight, my 6 year old asked me something that I don't think I was prepared for. She asked me, "Daddy, if mommy said she was sorry, would you give her another chance?" I just stared at her. Her eyes were watering up. I said, "I don't know, sweetheart. I would pray about it and leave it up to God."

I don't know. It seems as if the only one in this situation that kind of wins........is me. I'm happy.


----------



## 06Daddio08 (Jul 26, 2012)

My oldest is 6.

She doesn't ask any questions anymore.

Not sure what to make of it.


----------



## indiecat (Sep 24, 2012)

Great answer to your child! Not slagging the ex is being a good dad!


----------



## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

Eventually, the truth must be told.


----------



## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

Although my boys are now college-aged, the older one has seen the evidence first-hand, knows, and firmly believes the truth about STBXW. While sympathetic, the younger one is somewhat in denial because he doen't want to sacrifice his good relationship with her!


----------



## lee101981 (Sep 6, 2012)

That was a great response! It is a fine line to walk!


----------



## wiigirl (Jun 14, 2012)

lee101981 said:


> That was a great response! It is a fine line to walk!


It really is and hard to keep your emotions in check.


----------



## Dedicated2Her (Nov 13, 2010)

Conrad said:


> Eventually, the truth must be told.


Conrad, the kids know. That is why the question is phrased, whould you give mommy a second chance. They know I worked my butt off to save my marriage. I have never slammed their mom, but I have told them that mommy is the one who wanted me to leave. They understand, but they also see both our daily lives. The evidence there is plenty truth enough to see which of their parents has honor.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

Dedicated2Her said:


> Conrad, the kids know. That is why the question is phrased, whould you give mommy a second chance. They know I worked my butt off to save my marriage. I have never slammed their mom, but I have told them that mommy is the one who wanted me to leave. They understand, but they also see both our daily lives. The evidence there is plenty truth enough to see which of their parents has honor.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Many times, the temptation is to lie and cover for the ex.

That doesn't do the kids any good.

BTW, I thought your response was fine. "What if" are truly useless questions, because they're about delusion.

But, from your sweet little child, it's totally expected.

You're a good dad.


----------

