# Advice to our daughters



## janesmith (Nov 29, 2010)

*Advice to our daughters before they get married*

I was been thinking about this since I had my first daughter, we have three. But more specifically since ive been on TAM, what do I tell my daughter about sex, love, relationships and marriage. 

What tid bits of wisdom would I share with her to help her have the happiest and satisfying of marriages. Here's my list. Please add yours.

1. Love him for who he is right this minute and not for who you think he can become.

2. Never stop flirting with him

3. Kids arent an excuse to not have sex

4. If you arent having sex with you husband he WILL think you dont love him

5. If he doesnt know why you are mad at him, he cant fix it. If he cant fix it then he is going to have a hard time relating. Give him something to fix. Its not fair to expect him to explore your murky feeling all the time and its exhausting to boot. It will be much less painful if you give a brief concrete description of what you feel and what he has done to bring that feeling on, lol. THAT he will understand. 

6. He wants to make you happy, sex is important to him lol. So dont make him to have figure it out. Tell him.

I have others, but im going to take a break. Im writing these in a journal so I can give it too the when they get older


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

I don't have children but at the top of my list would be:

Have self respect. If you respect yourself, you will attract the type of man that will also respect you and in turn, you will show him the respect he also deserves. Mutual respect, appreciation and gratitude is fundamental.


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## Auzzie (Jan 23, 2012)

Sex and love arent a mutual thing. Just because you have sex with a man/woman...doesnt mean he/she will be in love with you the next day.

Dont just give them the journal and walk away....talk it through with them as a small part of the arsenal of tools you may need to tread the murky, confusing world of navigating that stage with your girls.


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## janesmith (Nov 29, 2010)

I think I would add, you dont have to be in love to have sex. Sometimes being in "like" is enough


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## I'mAllIn (Oct 20, 2011)

My daughter's getting married in June, so I've been thinking about this a lot. We've had lots of great talks in the last few months. So far the big things I've told her are:

Don't expect him to read your mind. Talk to him, tell him what you want, expect, need from him. And do it BEFORE you're really mad at him for not doing something.

Really listen to him when he tells you what he want's, expects, and needs from you. Don't take it lightly. Remember how hard it was for you to do it. Meet as many of them as you can, and tell him why you can't meet the ones that you can't.

Thank him, all the time, for the little things and the big things. You may think that he knows you appreciate him, but chances are he doesn't. 

Do not let the sex stop. Good sex makes up for a lot of things, too little sleep, a crappy job, a tiny apartment, burnt dinner, whatever. I will watch the future kids if that's the problem. Just don't let the sex stop.

Watch your weight. Take it from me, it's much easier to never gain it than to try to lose it.


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## FirstYearDown (Sep 15, 2011)

No children here.

I would have loved to hear my parents tell me it was okay to be independent and think for myself. They were way too overprotective and sexist.

I was groomed for marriage since I was nine years old. I was not allowed to do my homework until I watched my mother cook. 

For years, I did not want to get married because I thought it was shackles for a woman. My mother was very overworked and unhappy. 

Life just surprises you sometimes. I met a decent man who treats me like an equal and not his maid.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

janesmith said:


> I think I would add, you dont have to be in love to have sex. Sometimes being in "like" is enough


Yea, I won't be telling my daughter that right now.. she's 12. 

She can figure that out for herself when she's older. lol. 

We have very candid talks about sex though. She knows I'll answer everything and sometimes even get pictures. Why not? More education, better choices.


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## I'mInLoveWithMyHubby (Nov 7, 2011)

janesmith said:


> I think I would add, you dont have to be in love to have sex. Sometimes being in "like" is enough


Are you really serious? I have a 17 year old and if I taught her that, she'd be pregnant right now, most likely. We keep a very watchful eye on our children. She is not to be in private with a boy without parent supervision. I may be strict, but I stand by my rules! I teach my daughter to at least be engaged before having sex, although marriage would be ideal. We will continue to meet any new friends parents before we allow our daughter over to spend time, this applies to any of her friends. These rules will apply to our other two children as well.

You are teaching your daughters that one night stands are okay. They are not okay. Your daughter may end up with a non curable STD or pregnant.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## janesmith (Nov 29, 2010)

ofcourse that advice wouldnt be for a child. I didnt think i had to spell that out. that would be grown woman advice geesh.

Please keep the judgment out of this thread. It has a good vibe going. In fact I like to ask you to remove some of your post. You of course will make your own choice. We may not agree with each other but our thoughts come from our own perspective. We need to respect that.


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## SunnyT (Jun 22, 2011)

I think... in this day and age, you have to tell them specifically, "Do not have children until YOU are in a position to raise them without help." Because once you have them, they are 100% yours, whether the other parent stays involved or not. 

I also tell them, there is no such thing as 50/50...in marriage, relationships or in child raising, YOU have to give 100% and you should expect 100%. 

Be ready, able and willing to pull your own weight, to support yourself, to support your family, to reach for your goals, to not give up on ambitions, dreams, or love. It's easy to give up. It's more worthwhile to be ABLE and ready to EARN what you have....and not just material items. 

Don't sweat the small stuff....and it's ALL small stuff. 

Don't EVER have sex until you are at least 50. (Ya, that one got me a few grandkids!)


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## FirstYearDown (Sep 15, 2011)

Nobody has the right to tell others how to raise their children.

As human beings, kids need space to breathe, make mistakes and learn from them.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

> Here's my list. Please add yours


I did a thread I put alot of thought & my heart into on this specific topic....it is long and not everyone will agree with me, nor would I expect them too in this day & age, I am admittably a little old fashioned. But not overly so, I do give some leeway considering even teens have raging sex drives. Not talking about these things - I feel is the worst thing we can do as parents. 

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/family...-sex-relation-love-her-emotions-her-life.html

.


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## DTO (Dec 18, 2011)

Not a woman, but have a daughter and I'm the attentive parent, so I have the most influence:

How about we add:

* Be self-sufficient and content in yourself (financially and emotionally). You don't want to look for someone to fill a hole in your life.

* Effort in marriage is an even split. Don't fall for the lie (that people still tell) that a woman should expect to receive more than she gives in a relationship.


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## DTO (Dec 18, 2011)

SimplyAmorous said:


> I did a thread I put alot of thought & my heart into on this specific topic....it is long and not everyone will agree with me, nor would I expect them too in this day & age, I am admittably a little old fashioned. But not overly so, I do give some leeway considering even teens have raging sex drives. Not talking about these things - I feel is the worst thing we can do as parents.
> 
> http://talkaboutmarriage.com/family...-sex-relation-love-her-emotions-her-life.html
> 
> .


Lots of good stuff in the URL, but...

Even giving the religious bent, it seems lacking in the transition from "honor your body" before marriage to "you are his only legitimate outlet" after marriage. Also, needs mention that his preference matter as much as hers. Honoring her body and meeting a husband's sexual preferences (even if it something she doesn't particularly enjoy herself) are not mutually exclusive.


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

what about bj's

by the number of post about misserable husbands not getting any maybe they should be cjued in on how important they are.


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## janesmith (Nov 29, 2010)

lmao @ Chillmorn. in relation to that, i would tell my GROWN UP daughter (let me specify that) to not start anything while dating man or woman it thats their bent, that she's not going to take into marriage with that person


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

Without reading other replies, here's what comes to mind:
- Don't get married if you have ANY doubts
- Don't get married till you're at least 25
- Have sex with him before you're married, lots of it
- Have sex with him after you're married, lots of it
- Expect to fall out of love with him from time to time. Also expect to fall right back in love with him.
- Never EVER stand for any form of abuse
- Never be afraid to leave, but don't plan on it either unless you really need to
- Put something into his love bank at least once a day
- Accept him for who he is, or don't accept him at all. You cannot change anyone but yourself.
- Discuss all the big stuff before deciding to marry him. Kids, jobs, money, sex, everything. 
- Never let him force you to do anything
- Make sure he makes you laugh regularly
- Cook with him, lots
- Don't ever stop kissing him


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## janesmith (Nov 29, 2010)

i love ur list hope. all of these are really good


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## janesmith (Nov 29, 2010)

what would you have liked your mother or woman figures in your life to have told you to make marriage "easier" for you


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## DTO (Dec 18, 2011)

chillymorn said:


> what about bj's
> 
> by the number of post about miserable husbands not getting any maybe they should be clued in on how important they are.


You know, in all seriousness, I don't feel comfortable telling any adult what to do or not do. I cannot predict what value system she will adopt and don't want to load her with baggage. I will tell her:

* I would prefer she wait until engagement / marriage until having sex (because guys will try to use a woman - something a father understands - and that creates its own baggage).
* sexual satisfaction (physical release - not just emotional bonding) is important to marital happiness
* having sex just to physically enjoy your partner is okay (and so is birth control)
* there is nothing wrong with a BJ, role playing, etc.
* not to judge a sexual (or any) act solely by what you get from it directly
* at the end of the day, you do not have do anything and you should not be physically forced - but failure to do something may bring other consequences to bear

I know I'll catch some grief for that last one. But, for instance, if a lady simply refuses to give a BJ, it is unreasonable to expect her husband to treat her as exactly the same as if she had.

I am not talking about divorce or an affair. But he might pull back a bit: not gas her car up, cook a meal for her he doesn't like, etc. It is human nature to give more to those that do more for us; the opposite also is true. Allowing someone to think they can make a decision impacting another person with zero consequences is setting him or her up for disappointment.


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

janesmith said:


> what would you have liked your mother or woman figures in your life to have told you to make marriage "easier" for you


I sat and stared out the window, thinking, trying to respond to this good question. I really couldn't come up with anything, to be honest. The lessons that I have learned (and still learning), had to be experienced. If I was told, I'm not sure that I would necessarily understand the importance of them. I saw the failing marriage of my parents. I heard/experienced a lot of negativity as a result. Perhaps I saw what I didn't want for myself and what I wouldn't put up with. Separate to this, the most valuable thing my mother instilled in me, was a good sense of self. I think having self-respect has assisted me in making good decisions for myself.

I have experienced the loving, long-term marriage of my grandparents (over 60 years) before they passed. I'd be curious to know their advice. My grandad helped teach me about gratitude and perspective. I bring this into my marriage.

The most I have learned, about myself, about our marriage, has been through my husband himself. 

While I think gathering thoughts to share with your daughter is a wonderful idea, I also think the most valuable lessons will be through her own experiences and observing her role models.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

DTO said:


> Lots of good stuff in the URL, but...
> 
> Even giving the religious bent, it seems lacking in the transition from "honor your body" before marriage to "you are his only legitimate outlet" after marriage.


 I am not sure what you mean exactly.... do you get the idea I mean masterbation is wrong or something ? If so, not at all. I just feel if one partner is feeling it, the other should care to please, or try to get in that mindframe, that doesn't mean the one feeling it has to take them up on it, nothing wrong with a little self pleasure once in a while, to not burden our spouses. 



> Also, needs mention that his preference matter as much as hers. Honoring her body and meeting a husband's sexual preferences (even if it something she doesn't particularly enjoy herself) are not mutually exclusive.


 Not quite getting what you mean here again, sorry!!! But did want to hear more of what you have to say .


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## Trenton (Aug 25, 2010)

I have a 15 year old daughter. Tough age because I'm watching her struggle with discovering who she is and having the body of a woman but mind of a child.

Mainly what I tell her is along the lines of...believe in yourself and even when you don't, I always will. (This is the biggest one that I always reiterate)

If you have any questions or something comes up that you're confused about, I'm always here. 

Boys at your age are really interested in sex, if you're not, respect your body because if you don't, they won't. 

It's OK to be curious but it's important to be careful and thoughtful.

Everyone messes up from time to time, don't be too hard on yourself, but don't be too easy either because you never know if you can do something till you try.

Don't be afraid to try and if you succeed I'll be your biggest fan, if you fail, me and Dad will be here to help you back up again.

Don't be afraid to love. You are worthy of love. If you are ever heart broken, and you will be sometime along the way if you risk loving, don't be afraid to cry and don't be afraid to love again.

Mainly these are things my husband and I reiterated throughout her life so some are spoken and some are obvious through our actions.


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## DTO (Dec 18, 2011)

SimplyAmorous said:


> I am not sure what you mean exactly.... do you get the idea I mean masterbation is wrong or something ? If so, not at all. I just feel if one partner is feeling it, the other should care to please, or try to get in that mindframe, that doesn't mean the one feeling it has to take them up on it, nothing wrong with a little self pleasure once in a while, to not burden our spouses.
> 
> Not quite getting what you mean here again, sorry!!! But did want to hear more of what you have to say .


I did not take away that you felt masturbation was wrong or any such thing.

My comment meant simply that, in my opinion, this type of talk needs to be carefully balanced. I have the mindset that love is an action as much as a feeling and that we are responsible for providing for the sexual fulfillment of our spouses.

So, if I tell my daughter that her body and sexuality are precious and ought to be respected, I would explicitly tell her that her husband's are equally so. My concern would be to make sure she does not take an "I don't feel like that so I don't have to" mindset.


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## janesmith (Nov 29, 2010)

Guys I was thinking in terms of marital advice. Im sorry I wasnt clearer, but you guys have some good stuff going


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## Trenton (Aug 25, 2010)

janesmith said:


> Guys I was thinking in terms of marital advice. Im sorry I wasnt clearer, but you guys have some good stuff going


Yeah, I'm not there yet. Sowry.


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## janesmith (Nov 29, 2010)

me either trenton. my oldest daughter is 17 and the youngest is 10, so i have a ways to go. Reading this forum inspired thoughts of what i would like them to know from my experiences that I think would help them have successful adult romantic relationships/marriages


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## Trenton (Aug 25, 2010)

I read you Jane except if I bring up the concept of marriage my daughter has very little interest. I don't think it's on her radar in any way so I can offer advice based upon our interactions and my observations but unsolicited advice often falls on deaf ears. If I even approach the subject she'll tell me she doesn't have time for dating/marriage and doesn't want to have kids...ever. She plans on adopting. She's 15, I'm pretty sure she thinks she knows it all. haha

At this moment in time my daughter would swear up and down that she's going to get into a great college, go to medical school and become a fabulous doctor. That's her flavor of the year. Two years ago she was set on being a Vet. I'm waiting for that first true love, interest in boys, etc. but she's not heading there yet beyond telling me about slight crushes.

Honestly though, I think our kids are great at observing and imitating. The best way to inspire them to get into a great relationship is to model it within our own households.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

DTO said:


> I did not take away that you felt masturbation was wrong or any such thing.
> 
> My comment meant simply that, in my opinion, this type of talk needs to be carefully balanced. I have the mindset that love is an action as much as a feeling and that we are responsible for providing for the sexual fulfillment of our spouses.


 Is there anything I said that you feel is not balanced ? Seriously I would like to know. Challenge me. Because I couldn't agree more with you on what you just said here ... that *we are responsible for providing for the sexual fulfillment of our spouses*. If anything in my writng has even a sentence in it that does not express that -- I will go back and change it! 



> So, if I tell my daughter that her body and sexuality are precious and ought to be respected, I would explicitly tell her that her husband's are equally so. My concern would be to make sure she does not take an "I don't feel like that so I don't have to" mindset.


 I am not sure how long you have been on this forum but if you even think I feel differently than you do, my oh my are you ever off. When I read stories of hurting men -the wives have a lacking sex drive & refuse them over & over, my temperature starts to rise, I want to near lash out at such wives for not satisfying their husbands, oh my yes ! In fact, I have to take a deep breathe , "tone down" my thoughts a little before I post, because I will come on way too strong, most especially if they are good men, doing all they can, treating and leading their wives in the way they should without causing resentment. 

Couldn't agree with you more in these things, and I thank you for taking the time to read my thread.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Sex is important. Don't marry anyone whom you don't know them sexually.

Don't fight about money. If you want more, make more. Don't put the financial burden on your husband.

Don't sweat the small stuff. Seriously. Laugh often, even if you're frustrated.


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## DTO (Dec 18, 2011)

SimplyAmorous said:


> Is there anything I said that you feel is not balanced ? Seriously I would like to know. Challenge me. Because I couldn't agree more with you on what you just said here ... that *we are responsible for providing for the sexual fulfillment of our spouses*. If anything in my writng has even a sentence in it that does not express that -- I will go back and change it!
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I am glad we agree. I have not been on here all that long, so I was just going off of what I saw written.

Nonetheless, these issues are so critical to our daughter's future happiness that it is nearly impossible to over-emphasize. My daughter is not yet old enough to discuss such matters, but as she hits her teen years I will be sure to discuss these issues regularly so that she knows where I stand.

Even at that, I will re-emphasize these principles as she hits that exclusive relationship phase of her life. I simply feel it is important enough to revisit regularly.


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## LovesHerMan (Jul 28, 2011)

The difficult thing that I have found about giving advice to our children is that they have to learn the hard way, from experience. They do not seem capable of learning from our advice.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

lovesherman said:


> The difficult thing that I have found about giving advice to our children is that they have to learn the hard way, from experience. They do not seem capable of learning from our advice.


You're right, however, if you set them up with the right attitude about things, they have a better chance at success.

My friend's parents were weird about sex and bodies. She wasn't even allowed to drink Naked Juice 

She and her husband have TONS of sex issues. No wonder why.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

lovesherman said:


> The difficult thing that I have found about giving advice to our children is that they have to learn the hard way, from experience. They do not seem capable of learning from our advice.


Although this is true for many teens..... I do not believe all. I have been very pleased with the outcome in our home of how my 2 oldest sons (so far) have been conducting themselves, even today I had a 20 minute indept conversation with my 2nd son about getting too close with his GF- and yes, IN that way.... while I was cooking lunch. He is very receptive, he asks me questions, he listens, he also shared with me how he is having "those feelings" . Which I expect, I want him to be honest like that , if he couldnt go there it would be more of a concern to me. Him & her both wear silver rings and plan to wait till marraige for sex. Her parents love him, allow him to come over all the time, she is coming over today, they are only in 9th grade. I hope I am not putting too much TRUST in him - and this will bite me later on, but so long as we can talk openly as we do - I feel very good about it. I also talk to him about the likelihood of a break up, since they are so very young and how he will feel afterwards, he thinks they will "be" forever. I guess it is possible since I met his dad at 15. But unlikely --yes...I want my son to be grounded in the realities of life. 

He told me today he told his GF that there was 3 things his mother didn't allow him to do....(cause I am prettty lenient with my kids so long as they show Responsibility)... is "Sex, Drugs, and football" I said "hmmm, I think I need to make that list a little longer".. I did add drinking to it , not a good thing. My 21 yr old son has been very receptive to all of my & husbands teachings over the years. And he is a Youth Leader/Worship Leader. 


If parents are providing a good example, they see, feel & are a part of a happy thriving homelife, why would they not want that for thier own futures and if the parents do not come off as "perfect" /strict to the core...but humble & understanding of thier struggles as teens, feelings and desires, although, these conversations may be awkward at 1st, it doesn't need to remain so. It's not in our house, it has become free flowing somehow. 

They know we want the best for them, they look around them and see broken relationships everywhere, if they are smart kids- caring to look at the whole picture.... they will take notice of these things. My son was telling me how eveyone in his grade things you need to sleep with the girls, this is common. And we encourage them to come to us about anything/everthing, and they do...we are very "approachable", they often share the goings on in school , how kids talk, what trouble they get into. And they also share how they feel about such things so I know where they are at. 

Me , on the other hand, I learned through observation to NOT make the same mistakes as my own mother did, she didn't teach me anything really.


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

that_girl said:


> You're right, however, if you set them up with the right attitude about things, they have a better chance at success.


:iagree:


which may also mean how to handle themselves when things don't go according to plan. To the OP, I know you're seeking advice more specifically about marriage, but I do think her foundations of behavior, attitude etc are important to consider in this but then again, whadda I know?


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## britney5 (Nov 20, 2011)

My advice would be to lose your virginity to someone you love, though make sure you have sex with the person that becomes your husband before you get married.


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

my advice is, to all my kids: take resposibility for your own actions, be accountable for your life and what happens in it. while this may not be purly specific to marriage, i do believe it can contribute to the downfall if its not put into practice.

i cant remember when i was growing up if there was a propensity to blame others for your own problems. i do however see that our society has gotten out of control with this attitude now. people have a hard time looking at their self in the mirror. alot of people are waiting for others to lead, to make the first move. stubborness and the desire to win all the time are rampant. letting someone else make you feel better about yourself and your lot in life is not the way to go.

marriage is give and take, listen to your spouse, try to understand their side of things.


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## FirstYearDown (Sep 15, 2011)

chillymorn said:


> what about bj's
> 
> by the number of post about misserable husbands not getting any maybe they should be cjued in on how important they are.


:lol::lol:
Maybe when your child is an adult?

My mother taught me that sex was gross and just to be tolerated by women. She is appalled that I have a high sex drive; poor woman has never given or received oral sex despite the fact that she has been married for nearly forty years. :rofl:

Thankfully, I was smart enough to realize that her attitude was bullsh!t.


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## 7737 (Feb 10, 2011)

As parents it is our responsibility to send our children out into the world with as many tools in their tool box as we can possibly give them.
Give them the best education you can possibly afford so they if they want to be a brain surgeon or a gardener they can.

Tell them that smoking is bad because of xyz
Tell them about the dangers of alcohol/drug abuse
Explain all about contraception, sex, love

One thing you shouldn't do is tell them NOT to do something!

We cannot make their minds up for them...all we can do is give them all the information and support we possibly can to enable THEM to reach an informed decision themselves. Give them the most comprehensive tool box ever!


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## Freak On a Leash (Feb 19, 2010)

My advice is to stay single. 

My 17 year old daughter's seen a lot in almost two years so I don't have to tell her much. .She's seen and heard it all, first hand. 

What I have told her is to never be afraid to be alone.

That only if you can be happy with yourself and your own company, can you be happy with someone else...that no one person can bring you happiness and contentment if it isn't within yourself to begin with. 

I've told her to always to be independent and never be in a position where she has to depend on someone else to live her life. 

That life is too short to waste time being miserable. 

As far as sex goes. I went over that years ago. I told her that if she dresses and acts like a sl*ut she'll be treated as such. 

I told her that if she gets pregnant before marriage I'll kill her. I think she's still trying to figure out how serious I am. 

I have told her that she shouldn't give up her virginity lightly. That she should love the person she is with, preferably be thinking of marriage and definitely in love. She's seen first hand what casual, sexual relationships can do to people (a few of her friends have slept around, with bad results). It's convinced her to wait for the right person and the right time. 

She's a smart girl and tends to figure these things out for herself but it never hurts for me to emphasize certain things with her. 

What I do know is that we've always had an open and honest relationship with each other about relationships and sex. No problems whatsoever and I've always liked and approved of the boys she's gone out with so she's doing something right...and at 17 she's still a virgin with no plans to change anything. :smthumbup:


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

^ rock on, mama!


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## lovinmyhubby223 (Jan 31, 2012)

I would say make sure you know him and he knows you before you get married. I mean really KNOW each other. Likes, dislikes, kinks, pet peeves the whole nine yards. I have read so many posts here where women and men are “unhappily married” or in a “sexless marriage” and the stories these women and men tell it’s like the H or W was one person before the marriage and someone completely different after. I would tell her that over time you and he will change because people change so be willing to adjust and adapt and if you know each other well enough those changes won’t be so drastic. 
Marriage isn’t a disposable thing it should be for life so go into it with that in mind and be sure you and he are in it for life before you have kids. Children WILL NOT help a failing marriage. If you and he can’t fix your issues then a child definitely won’t fix them in fact most times it makes it worse.


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## ericwills (Mar 7, 2012)

Nice for sharing.


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## MAEPT10 (Oct 19, 2011)

*Re: Advice to our daughters before they get married*



janesmith said:


> I was been thinking about this since I had my first daughter, we have three. But more specifically since ive been on TAM, what do I tell my daughter about sex, love, relationships and marriage.
> 
> What tid bits of wisdom would I share with her to help her have the happiest and satisfying of marriages. Here's my list. Please add yours.
> 
> ...



A man chiming in here.

Very good advice. I think its important to not only work on our own marriages but to influence our children's through our marriages so that they can be in the position to make healthy decisions. 

My problem is that my wife does not think this way, as stated above in the OP. She would have to come to terms with these things as being important to her and her marriage before spreading the word to her daughter (my step-daughter). I don't want my step daughter to grow up and treat some man the way that my wife treats me, (at least how I feel about it, and how I take it) as neglecting my feelings, my sexual needs, and not being a good communicator. 


The moment I held our son in my arms I knew that I had a responsibility to help him become a good and decent man. I hope I can find the list of things to give to him as he matures. I think I'm finding out what doesn't work. But that could only be because my wife is not responsive to me. My advice may just be, don't get married.


Great job taking responsibility to help your daughter with the things in marriage that she will face. I admire your honesty and bravery to at least realize these things are important in a marriage, they must be to you, other wise you wouldn't suggest it.

:smthumbup:


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