# High School Sweethearts - Solar Eclipse or the Ninja of Relationships?



## ISeeBedPeople (Mar 4, 2013)

Hi all, I'm a long-time lurker (found this board like 5 minutes ago, actually) and thought I'd do something.

Ever since I picked up one of those damn _Chicken Soup_ books in my aunt's bathroom as a teenager, I knew I was destined to be something special. 

I planned on incorporating that first sentence into my post, but I can't remember how it fit in now. To condense the exposition as much as possible: I met this absolutely gorgeous girl in elementary school and it blossomed into your typical love-story. We talked probably 3 times from second grade to high school and then fell madly in love over a chance MSN Messenger conversation (those were the days, weren't they?). Fast forward to now. I'm approaching senior status in college and we've been together for a wonderful 7 years.

We've lived separately throughout our relationship (including college), but it's reached the point where we spend at least 4-5 nights of the week together. As for all that "you won't know them until you've lived with them," pffffft. She knows I'm going to brush my teeth _after_ breakfast every morning, and I know that in the case of visitors, the toilet is off-limits for the day.

With the possibility of moving off after college for jobs and better restaurants looming, marriage is heavy on my mind, and I suppose that's how I wound up here. The idea of tying the knot has claimed an exponentially growing sector in the ol' noggin, and the pressure is really starting to build. Our relationship has been perfect sans the typical 100 calorie mishaps along the way, although I'd definitely say we hit a Quarter Pounder this summer that left me full for days. I'm not willing to disclose details but that event somehow solidified the idea that I want to marry this woman more than anything I've ever wanted in my life. My sole desire in life is to make her as happy/comfortable as possible, and I'll do everything in my power to make that happen.

Now, I come to this forum knowing that I'm young and have much to learn, but I'd love to hear any input from those of you who have built upon a successful early start.

BTW, if they make a movie about me someday where I'm the idealistic kid that gets off to a running start with his high school sweetheart and then turns into a total bum, I'm gonna be so pissed.


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## tryingtobebetter (Aug 6, 2012)

Well I suggest reading around on this website. You will learn a lot about married life. A lot of the posts are about problems of course so it probably gives a rather gloomy view unless viewed with that thought in mind.

There are some wise heads on here but also some disillusioned ones.

Read some books. I like the Five Love Languages and His Needs Her Needs. Even the best relationship can be improved so we should always want to raise our game.

I have been married 35 years and strongly recommend marriage if you have met the right person.

Best wishes for the future


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## icecream (Mar 4, 2013)

ISeeBedPeople said:


> My sole desire in life is to make her as happy/comfortable as possible, and I'll do everything in my power to make that happen.


Awww! That is really sweet! I wish my husband had the same desire for me! *sigh*

Well I don't have any advice or input for you, but all the best to you and future wife! xx


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## Rags (Aug 2, 2010)

This is what I thought on the subject:

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/long-term-success-marriage/58256-tips-newlyweds.html#post1137500


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## richie33 (Jul 20, 2012)

That's your sole desire? You will be back here in ten years singing a different tune.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## captainstormy (Jun 15, 2012)

I wouldn't say I'm cynical, I'm about to get married in June. But I couldn't imagine a marriage to a high school fling would often work long term.

I know you've been together for a while now, but people change so much between 18-30ish that its unreal. 

Your probably what 23ish right now? You'll both be different people in another few years. Maybe those two people can love each other. Maybe they can't.

Just my .02 thou. That's a lot of the reason I've waited until I'm 29 to get married even thou we have been dating for 7 years.


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## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

tryingtobebetter said:


> Well I suggest reading around on this website. You will learn a lot about married life. A lot of the posts are about problems of course so it probably gives a rather gloomy view unless viewed with that thought in mind.
> 
> There are some wise heads on here but also some disillusioned ones.
> 
> ...


Sound advice. :iagree:

38 years here. Enjoy the ride.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

First question. Now old are the two of you?


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## JTL (Dec 14, 2009)

I've got about 22 years in (started at high school age). I think most of the high school sweethart relationships fail. In my opinion, it is simply because of the changes people go through from adolescence to early, then full adulthood. So far, we have managed, though it has not always been easy. Now, the next part is just my opinion-I would not recommend or want my children to do the same thing i did. I think it is easier to experience life in early adulthood single. To experience other people and relationships and live life free of relationship responsibilities while you grow as a person. I love my wife and yes, because of the way it has worked out, i would do it all over again. That doesn't mean i don't see an advantage with being single from 17-27 though. All people are different and every relationship is unique so you won't really get any great advice here for your particular relationship. Marriage should be forever, and by that i mean you should not do it unless you are really committed to the person and the responsibilities of a life long relationship. Forever is a long time when you start young. I know i wasn't the same person or husband at 25 that i was at 35. I also know my attitude towards marriage and our life together was quite different. It's hard to be the ideal spouse when you're still maturing and experiencing things for the first time. I find things got easier after we had more life experience under our belts. Just my 2 cents. Good luck


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