# porn and relationships -- Do you hide it?



## magnificent27 (Jul 17, 2015)

I have been watching porn flix since I was 19 (18 years) pretty regularly when I am in relationships and between relationships. I probably watch porn 2-3 times a week to get off, sometimes a little more if I'm not having sex.

My question has to do with disclosure. I've never told a single gf or even my current wife that I watch it. Never once. In fact I've always managed to keep it secret with a few close calls of almost getting caught either "in the act" or with my stash (before streaming days and just having VHS DVDs). I always prefer sex over porn, so I don't think I have a problem, but I have HD and like sex regularly. If I can't get sex, i turn to porn. 

Is it normal to hide it? Perhaps it is the shame aspect or my guilt watching/seeing other women naked Two of my best friends also hide porn from their wives, so that makes me feel less guilty/weird. Then again, I read about couples who watch it together and/or dont mind one partner watching/getting off alone. 
How many of you hide it? Did any of you once hide it the later reveal it to your partner?

One more point, It is very difficult, even stressful, to schedule secretive porn watching times when living together. I feel like I'm 14 still and hiding a Playboy under my mattress! Sometimes I just want to say "honey, I know we aren't making love tonight, so don't mind me while I wank to this streaming site. " :surprise:


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## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

I personally think it is best to be able to share your entire sexual self with your partner, and that means unashamedly disclosing your masturbation habits (whether you are male or female, whether you use toys, porn, whatever). The reason I think it is best, is because if you are hiding a part of your sexuality, you are setting yourself and your spouse up for something one or the other might be hurt about, and also because there may be things you could share about your solo activities that your spouse may enjoy knowing about you or participating in.

However, I also understand hiding it and keeping your solo activities to yourself in some cases. It is an individual thing and depends on your circumstances.

Being unshamed about who you are and what you enjoy is usually best, though. Not that you must share every detail, but at least being able to be yourself and express your sexuality with authenticity is best in a relationship.


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## magnificent27 (Jul 17, 2015)

One more thing to add-- when I first met my wife we were having sex almost every day for the first two months. During that time I had no desire to watch porn. When I only have sex 1-2 times I week, like now, I go crazy and need to get off. I am HD for sure but my wife isnt as into it (not LD but not Hd either). 
I am pointing this out because I really do believe I am not addicted to porn.... but maybe I am???


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## Fozzy (Jul 20, 2013)

Faithful Wife said:


> I personally think it is best to be able to share your entire sexual self with your partner, and that means unashamedly disclosing your masturbation habits (whether you are male or female, whether you use toys, porn, whatever). The reason I think it is best, is because if you are hiding a part of your sexuality, you are setting yourself and your spouse up for something one or the other might be hurt about, and also because there may be things you could share about your solo activities that your spouse may enjoy knowing about you or participating in.
> 
> However, I also understand hiding it and keeping your solo activities to yourself in some cases. It is an individual thing and depends on your circumstances.
> 
> Being unshamed about who you are and what you enjoy is usually best, though. Not that you must share every detail, but at least being able to be yourself and express your sexuality with authenticity is best in a relationship.


Totally agree. I hid my masturbation from my wife for years. I honestly don't know why either, other than learned shame. One day, I just stopped giving a crap. Been totally chill about it ever since. My wife is still a little weirded out about it, but meh, oh well.


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## kingsfan (Jun 4, 2012)

I hide it when I'm doing it but she knows I do watch some. She's fine with it but has no interest in seeing any herself.

In my last relationship I hid it. She had strong oppressive views of pornography and even masturbation and she'd go judgmental on me about it, so it made it easier to not tell her and sneak around with it. Never going to end up in that type of BS again.


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## lilbitoluv (Aug 14, 2015)

I dont think it is something you should hide but you should be discreet about it. It's not that big of a deal in that you are not cheating. But it is in the fact that you feel the need to hide it and always have which is an indicator that you know you are doing something that is at least somewhat unacceptable. While I think most women in general expect that at some time or another men look at porn, she probably already knows. You probably expect that she will be turned off or feel inadequate. She likely will not even care that much. I think porn is okay as long as it is not something that subtracts from your actual sex life and you don't feel the need to hide it like a teenager. That is kind of demeaning to your own self. However, i will say that too often the sexual energy we feel is released only by sex when it could be used in other productive ways. If you're excited and can't have sex, go workout or use your energy creatively. Sex is great but i truly believe we do ourselves a disservice by limiting that energy to sexual release.


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

I all my years of using research on the psychology of porn use to try and replace my previous and somewhat OCD actual porn use habits, I have learned that in ALL relationships that women are way more hurt by the act of men HIDING porn than the actual porn itself. Essentially the foundation of trust is broken if women find their mate is "hiding" porn, and the relationship can severely suffer.

It is possible that your wife may prefer not to know and that she prefers you to just be discrete when you have an urge to do something like that. But both of you should feel very comfortable asking each other questions and being honest if one of the two wants to talk about it or has a concern. 

Hope that helps, 
Badsanta


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

She should probably be let in. Secrets can hurt more in the long run.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## staarz21 (Feb 6, 2013)

magnificent27 said:


> One more thing to add-- when I first met my wife we were having sex almost every day for the first two months. During that time I had no desire to watch porn. When I only have sex 1-2 times I week, like now, I go crazy and need to get off. I am HD for sure but my wife isnt as into it (not LD but not Hd either).
> I am pointing this out because I really do believe I am not addicted to porn.... but maybe I am???


No. No. No. You're not addicted to porn. From what you've said, your habits seems totally normal. When you're watching it everyday, several hours a day, and ignoring your spouse or preferring porn to sex, then you need to look at it being a problem. I think what you've described sounds completely normal. 

However, I do think you should be open about your porn use. You can explain it to your W that you would prefer having sex with her daily, but since he cannot (or will not) do that, sometimes you meet your needs yourself with the use of porn. 

I agree with Bad Santa that a lot of the hurt many women feel over porn has to do with the lying or hiding part of it. So, try to be as open as you can.


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## NoIinThreesome (Nov 6, 2007)

I treat porn the same way I treat clipping my toe nails, flossing, or passing gas. Out of courtesy to my SO, I practice good computer hygiene habits (clear the history, put away the tissue, make sure there's no mess) and generally make sure that it doesn't interfere in any way with my relationship. 

It's not anything to be ashamed of, but neither is it something to be flaunted (unless your partner is completely OK with it.) If I were asked about it, I would be honest, but circumspect. It's a relationship, not a deposition.


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## magnificent27 (Jul 17, 2015)

NoIinThreesome said:


> I treat porn the same way I treat clipping my toe nails, flossing, or passing gas. Out of courtesy to my SO, I practice good computer hygiene habits (clear the history, put away the tissue, make sure there's no mess) and generally make sure that it doesn't interfere in any way with my relationship.
> 
> It's not anything to be ashamed of, but neither is it something to be flaunted (unless your partner is completely OK with it.) If I were asked about it, I would be honest, but circumspect. It's a relationship, not a deposition.


I am careful to erase my tracks. 

Does this mean your partner does not know? 

I wouldn't deny it if she asked... but I would feel quite ashamed.


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## magnificent27 (Jul 17, 2015)

A few years ago I was in between relationships and watching porn maybe 3-5 times a week. One week I decided to try and get off without it (no visual stimulation, just my imagination) and it was very difficult. It made me realize how much I rely on visual images to get off and how much I rely on this type of stimulation.

When I make love, it rarely in the complete dark, although the feeling alone with my eyes shut will still lead to orgasm...

I guess I'm wondering how much porn makes us rely on the visuals for stimulation and if that (negatively?) affects actual intercourse expectations and requirements...


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## magnificent27 (Jul 17, 2015)

Faithful Wife said:


> I personally think it is best to be able to share your entire sexual self with your partner, and that means unashamedly disclosing your masturbation habits (whether you are male or female, whether you use toys, porn, whatever). The reason I think it is best, is because if you are hiding a part of your sexuality, you are setting yourself and your spouse up for something one or the other might be hurt about, and also because there may be things you could share about your solo activities that your spouse may enjoy knowing about you or participating in.
> 
> However, I also understand hiding it and keeping your solo activities to yourself in some cases. It is an individual thing and depends on your circumstances.
> 
> Being unshamed about who you are and what you enjoy is usually best, though. Not that you must share every detail, but at least being able to be yourself and express your sexuality with authenticity is best in a relationship.


I feel lots of shame for it...

Sometimes I will ask to do something in the bedroom that I saw in a film. One time I asked my wife to do something and she didn't like the idea. I immediately apologized and said, "maybe I got that idea from too much porn in the past." She laughed when I said that... it was the closest I came to admitting that I watch it now...


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## magnificent27 (Jul 17, 2015)

staarz21 said:


> No. No. No. You're not addicted to porn. From what you've said, your habits seems totally normal. When you're watching it everyday, several hours a day, and ignoring your spouse or preferring porn to sex, then you need to look at it being a problem. I think what you've described sounds completely normal.
> 
> However, I do think you should be open about your porn use. You can explain it to your W that you would prefer having sex with her daily, but since he cannot (or will not) do that, sometimes you meet your needs yourself with the use of porn.
> 
> I agree with Bad Santa that a lot of the hurt many women feel over porn has to do with the lying or hiding part of it. So, try to be as open as you can.



I will try to talk to her about it... Thank you.

I should add that we have not made love since she got pregnant two months ago. She said she has no drive right now and feels too uncomfortable. I think this has made me think more about porn to get some relief.


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## magnificent27 (Jul 17, 2015)

badsanta said:


> I all my years of using research on the psychology of porn use to try and replace my previous and somewhat OCD actual porn use habits, I have learned that in ALL relationships that women are way more hurt by the act of men HIDING porn than the actual porn itself. Essentially the foundation of trust is broken if women find their mate is "hiding" porn, and the relationship can severely suffer.
> 
> It is possible that your wife may prefer not to know and that she prefers you to just be discrete when you have an urge to do something like that. But both of you should feel very comfortable asking each other questions and being honest if one of the two wants to talk about it or has a concern.
> 
> ...


Badsanta--

This advice helps a lot. 

I don't like having any secrets between us and this is one of the reasons I try to limit my watching...
I want to be brave and tell her without hurting her feelings...


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## gouge_away (Apr 7, 2015)

The frequency with which you watch porn is affected by the frequency you are having sex.

Your not a porn addict.

If it were the other way around, then you might be an addict, or at least letting porn negatively impact your life.


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## Melinda123 (May 1, 2015)

My husband was secretly watching porn and escalated to messaging a porn queen while she performed, they messaged back and forth while she performed- while I was sitting in the same room. It was like pulling teeth to get him to admit to what the heck he was doing, and WHO he was messaging. I don't mind if he reads Playboy but the internet is dangerous. I'm not a holy roller, but a friend of a friend's husband watched porn, started paying to see more, lost all their savings, their marriage, his kids....it can be an addiction. I don't know where my husband is as far as addiction, but since he got interested in another woman at this time, I am of the belief that porn is not a good thing.


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## Catherine602 (Oct 14, 2010)

What makes you want to tell now? This is a sensitive time in your relationship. Chances are that if you tell her now, she may feel that she is inadequate and/or she has to compete with porn actresses. Too big a chance to take now that she is in pregnant and probably not feeling good about her body or libido. 

Is the person your wife knows you to be all those years different based on watching porn and masturbating?. It's different if it leads to escalating activity and cheating, that's not ok of course.

Think about it. You can always tell but once you do, you can never take it back. At lest wait until after the pregnancy and infancy.


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## jsmart (Mar 14, 2015)

Problem with porn is that it can lower your T levels. Making the husband less aggressive in pursuing his wife. I mean, why face constant rejection from the wife, when you can imagine you're the one banging that super sexy woman. Get your fix and not have to deal with the wife complaining "is that all you think about." 

Facing and pushing through rejection makes you better at romancing your wife. If you give up and just use porn and settle for the once or twice a week duty sex. you'll grow resentful. That resentment leads to lack of action on your part and before you know it, you have a wife on the prowl for romantic engagement.


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## gouge_away (Apr 7, 2015)

Uggh, so hey...
I've been out of the house for 3.5 months now. Living in mom's basement, I'm 33 years old.

My mom does this nock nock open thing, you know why even knock...

So by the time the door opens I pull the covers over myself and she starts badgering me, "what are you hiding, I know your hiding something, you look like your up to no good, you better not be doing something illegal!"

The whole 3 minutes I'm between laughing and tears of embarrassment, finally I just said, "hey babe, we will have to try this another time, my mom just walked in on me..."

This was two weeks ago.


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## kingsfan (Jun 4, 2012)

jsmart said:


> Problem with porn is that it can lower your T levels. Making the husband less aggressive in pursuing his wife. I mean, why face* constant rejection from the wife*, when you can imagine you're the one banging that super sexy woman. Get your fix and not have to deal with the wife complaining "is that all you think about."
> 
> Facing and pushing through rejection makes you better at romancing your wife. If you give up and just use porn and settle for the once or twice a week duty sex. you'll grow resentful. That resentment leads to lack of action on your part and before you know it, you have a wife on the prowl for romantic engagement.


That can also lower your T levels. If you are getting turned down that often, I see no issue skipping the rejection game.


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## magnificent27 (Jul 17, 2015)

Catherine602 said:


> What makes you want to tell now? This is a sensitive time in your relationship. Chances are that if you tell her now, she may feel that she is inadequate and/or she has to compete with porn actresses. Too big a chance to take now that she is in pregnant and probably not feeling good about her body or libido.
> 
> Is the person your wife knows you to be all those years different based on watching porn and masturbating?. It's different if it leads to escalating activity and cheating, that's not ok of course.
> 
> Think about it. You can always tell but once you do, you can never take it back. At lest wait until after the pregnancy and infancy.


I guess I thought about telling since it is more frequent lately, or at least the urge is...

You are right about it being a very sensitive time. Perhaps I will hold off until after the pregnancy. Good advice


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## gouge_away (Apr 7, 2015)

That might not be the best time either. I would be very careful how you present this.


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## magnificent27 (Jul 17, 2015)

gouge_away said:


> That might not be the best time either. I would be very careful how you present this.


Yeah, I will probably just wait some time...


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## magnificent27 (Jul 17, 2015)

jsmart said:


> Problem with porn is that it can lower your T levels. Making the husband less aggressive in pursuing his wife. I mean, why face constant rejection from the wife, when you can imagine you're the one banging that super sexy woman. Get your fix and not have to deal with the wife complaining "is that all you think about."
> 
> Facing and pushing through rejection makes you better at romancing your wife. If you give up and just use porn and settle for the once or twice a week duty sex. you'll grow resentful. That resentment leads to lack of action on your part and before you know it, you have a wife on the prowl for romantic engagement.


I find lovemaking infinitely more satisfying than porn. Rejection is a tad frustrating, of course, but I am high drive and still make the effort even if the odds seem low.
Perhaps that will change in the future. We have only been married 20 months. 
Having the first child will add to the decreased frequency, I imagine


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## magnificent27 (Jul 17, 2015)

kingsfan said:


> That can also lower your T levels. If you are getting turned down that often, I see no issue skipping the rejection game.


In a past relationship I began to resent my ex for her constant rejections... 
I dont want that to happen again


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## gouge_away (Apr 7, 2015)

magnificent27 said:


> In a past relationship I began to resent my ex for her constant rejections...
> I dont want that to happen again


I used to feel really guilty about looking at porn. Christian upbringing, not that porn was evil or sinful, but that its not fair to make the woman you love compete with unrealistic characters for your desires. That wasn't loving, it certainly wasn't faithful and honorable.

Maybe take a break from the visuals, imagine your wife.


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## tommyr (May 25, 2014)

gouge_away said:


> I used to feel really guilty about looking at porn. Christian upbringing, not that porn was evil or sinful, but that its not fair to make the woman you love compete with unrealistic characters for your desires. That wasn't loving, it certainly wasn't faithful and honorable.
> 
> Maybe take a break from the visuals, imagine your wife.


You must have missed the part where he explained only when his wife rejects sex does he look at porn. So your post makes no sense at all! There is no competition for desire, SHE is just uninterested so he turns to Plan B. Nothing unfaithful or dishonerable about that, she has an active role in this.


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## *LittleDeer* (Apr 19, 2012)

I don't like porn, I personally don't think it has any place in a committed relationship and do not like the exploitation and pornificatuon of women. 

That said I masturbate all the time and gave no issue if my partner does it either so long as our sex life is healthy. And that means extremely frequent.


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

magnificent27 said:


> I guess I'm wondering how much porn makes us rely on the visuals for stimulation and if that (negatively?) affects actual intercourse expectations and requirements...



Here is a SUPER FUN experiment you can play with your brain that demonstrates that you DO NOT need the visuals. If you are like me when I was younger, you probably spent most of your porn watching with the volume turned all the way down in your efforts to not get caught. So try turning off the video, putting on some headphones and listening to the audio only. While I'll admit finding a clip that has good audio is difficult, when and if you find one will be quite an experience. 

Here is what happens, it will sound as if you snuck in the room with two people that are doing it and they are completely unaware you are there. Because you can not see anything, you imagination will start going INSANE trying to figure out what is going on, and this can be highly erotic and even better than watching the video.

What is nice about this experiment, is it will demonstrate to you that your own imagination can actually be WAY MORE exciting than seeing the explicit visuals of porn. ...then perhaps you can transition to reading erotic materials (books, blogs, and other nefarious things) to provide you with something for your mind to fantasize about and eventually you will find this to be way better than porn. What is nice about reading, is that people (women) are not being abused or paid for sex in an effort to create this type of materials. Written accounts of things erotic tend to be way more sincere, and even if they are fictitious will represent someone's inner most fantasy that is not inhibited by finding actors and a filming budget.

Then when it comes to being discrete, reading materials are a lot less obvious to someone seeing what you are doing than a graphic video playing on a screen. 

Also this will allow you to begin using your own fantasy as opposed to a video which is way more healthy as you can reflect on scenarios that involve you and your wife and perhaps enhance love making ideas between the two of you.

Good luck, 
Badsanta


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## magnificent27 (Jul 17, 2015)

intheory said:


> Turning things around often helps us to reach a better understanding of what action to take.
> 
> So imagine that your wife suddenly reveals to you that your sexual style (be it frequency, positions, stamina, type of foreplay . . .whatever), doesn't always "do it" for her the way she would like. You seemed to make an effort to please in the earlier stages of the relationship, but you've slacked off a lot recently.
> 
> ...


Excellent analogy. I would want to know if my wife used sex toys, etc. and what I could do to satisfy her needs and desires. I want openness and not secrets...

I will wait until after the pregnancy to talk about it.


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## magnificent27 (Jul 17, 2015)

badsanta said:


> Here is a SUPER FUN experiment you can play with your brain that demonstrates that you DO NOT need the visuals. If you are like me when I was younger, you probably spent most of your porn watching with the volume turned all the way down in your efforts to not get caught. So try turning off the video, putting on some headphones and listening to the audio only. While I'll admit finding a clip that has good audio is difficult, when and if you find one will be quite an experience.
> 
> Here is what happens, it will sound as if you snuck in the room with two people that are doing it and they are completely unaware you are there. Because you can not see anything, you imagination will start going INSANE trying to figure out what is going on, and this can be highly erotic and even better than watching the video.
> 
> ...


That's an interesting idea/experiment. And yes, I do have the volume down and sweat getting caught! :surprise:

I recently downloaded some erotic short stories and novels on my kindle. I want to see if I can get off with the imagination rather than moving images...


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## brooklynAnn (Jun 29, 2015)

I believe in openness, let her know about your secret hoard. Man, do you still have VHS?

Try to get her to watch some of those romantic ones with you. That's what my husband did, when I was younger and porn was dirty and evil. Then, progress from there. You might find that you don't need it at all once she knows.


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## magnificent27 (Jul 17, 2015)

brooklynAnn said:


> I believe in openness, let her know about your secret hoard. Man, do you still have VHS?
> 
> Try to get her to watch some of those romantic ones with you. That's what my husband did, when I was younger and porn was dirty and evil. Then, progress from there. You might find that you don't need it at all once she knows.


LOL-- no VHS or stash of videos. That was before the streaming stuff on the net! 

I will bring it up in conversation after the pregnancy and go from there... hard to imagine watching together.


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

magnificent27 said:


> I will bring it up in conversation after the pregnancy and go from there... hard to imagine watching together.


Since you are going to do some reading, you COULD read together with her and discuss. Just because your wife is pregnant does not mean that she is sexually dormant, and odds are she has a lot of hormones that would actually make her hyper sexual if you set the right tone in the bedroom. 

She may be distant sexually at the moment because it is actually you are the one that could be distant due to the stress of the upcoming birth and not wanting to do anything that could harm the baby. Once the baby is born, energy levels will be an issue as she will not be able to sleep normally for a few weeks, but until then I would strongly encourage you to be very close and intimate with your wife. Not necessarily wild and crazy, but just as emotionally close as possible!

Cheers, 
Badsanta


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## life_huppens (Jun 3, 2015)

magnificent27 said:


> I have been watching porn flix since I was 19 (18 years) pretty regularly when I am in relationships and between relationships. I probably watch porn 2-3 times a week to get off, sometimes a little more if I'm not having sex.
> 
> My question has to do with disclosure. I've never told a single gf or even my current wife that I watch it. Never once. In fact I've always managed to keep it secret with a few close calls of almost getting caught either "in the act" or with my stash (before streaming days and just having VHS DVDs). I always prefer sex over porn, so I don't think I have a problem, but I have HD and like sex regularly. If I can't get sex, i turn to porn.
> 
> ...


I am watching porn maybe 1 to 3 times per week. My wife knows this, I do not hide the fact, I do watch it when she is not around. She does not mind, but then again we do not have sex consistently and often. That said, it does not bother her. Again, I am not crazy about port, but it has it place. So, it all depends on how your partner fills about it. Bring the subject for the discussion, and asses your actions based on her response. In my case, if sex with my wife was frequent, I might not watched porn at all.
Hope this helps


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## OnTheFly (Mar 12, 2015)

magnificent27 said:


> I guess I'm wondering how much porn makes us rely on the visuals for stimulation and if that (negatively?) affects actual intercourse expectations and requirements...


An interesting TedTalk regarding this subject…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wSF82AwSDiU


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

OnTheFly said:


> An interesting TedTalk regarding this subject…
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wSF82AwSDiU


Just so you know Gary's wife Marnia preaches that the only true way to sustain a relationship is through giving up orgasms for both men and women. 

Reuniting | Healing with Sexual Relationships is her site. Many porn users end up there for some reason, so if you have an audience why not preach to them! 

They ARE nice people, but it is so freaking hilarious to read accounts to where women get all into this in somewhat of a cult fashion and then can't convince their boyfriends to give up orgasms in favor or a nonstop tantric love fest for the rest of their lives. 

Cheers, 
Badsanta

PS: Marnia and Gary have also gone to great lengths to dispel the myth that never ejaculating might be harmful to your prostate, cause it is completely natural to abstain from orgasms indefinitely as all this "wonderful" energy just gets reabsorbed! --- yes on the ceiling above my bed while I am having a great dream says Badsanta!


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## OnTheFly (Mar 12, 2015)

badsanta said:


> Just so you know Gary's wife Marnia preaches that the only true way to sustain a relationship is through giving up orgasms for both men and women.
> 
> Reuniting | Healing with Sexual Relationships is her site. Many porn users end up there for some reason, so if you have an audience why not preach to them!
> 
> ...


ugh….didn't know this! Does it affect the content of the TedTalk? If it does, OP, please disregard.


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## NoIinThreesome (Nov 6, 2007)

magnificent27 said:


> I am careful to erase my tracks.
> 
> Does this mean your partner does not know?
> 
> I wouldn't deny it if she asked... but I would feel quite ashamed.


She does know. I don't deny it, but neither do I feel shamed about it. I also am circumspect about the uh...nature...of some of the types of porn I consume. Just as I don't need to know the intimate details of her past sexual encounters, she has no need to know of my penchant for midget lesbian goth porn. :grin2:


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

OnTheFly said:


> ugh….didn't know this! Does it affect the content of the TedTalk? If it does, OP, please disregard.


Yes, 

They have this theory of the "coolidge effect" that causes us to loose attraction for our mates if we are limited to one mate without much novelty. Guess what? You can overcome this "coolidge effect" and be in love with one mate forever by giving up orgasms!

Regards, 
Badsanta


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## moco82 (Jul 16, 2012)

After you move in together, there is something about porn as a secret lair that's solely yours. Like a door hidden behind a book shelf. A basement with a pool table, a bar, and a large-screen TV might address a similar need; but the basement doesn't tickle the senses quite the same way.


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## Mrs.Submission (Aug 16, 2015)

I don't hide my porn use from my husband. 
He doesn't mind if I watch porn as long as those movies aren't ruining our sex life.


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