# Harder to stay faithful AFTER getting married?



## nbmGuy (Apr 26, 2012)

Men, I have heard that it's actually harder to stay faithful to your wife AFTER you get married. People tell me this, but they've never explained why.

I am a male and never been married, but I want to be. Do you find this to be true?

First, yes or no answers would be helpful along with explanations.

Thanks!


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## trey69 (Dec 29, 2010)

I can't say I feel this way. I have never had a problem staying faithful. Perhaps these friends of yours just have trouble staying faithful in general. Its odd they can't seem to tell you why though. I would point blank ask them.


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## nbmGuy (Apr 26, 2012)

trey69 said:


> I can't say I feel this way. I have never had a problem staying faithful. Perhaps these friends of yours just have trouble staying faithful in general. Its odd they can't seem to tell you why though. I would point blank ask them.


Maybe more have told me, but I distinctly remember two. One was a former girlfriend who is divorced b/c her husband cheated on her. She said when she got a ring on her finger MORE guys started hitting on her.

The other was a woman at work. I guess I could ask her to explain.


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## trey69 (Dec 29, 2010)

nbmGuy said:


> Maybe more have told me, but I distinctly remember two. One was a former girlfriend who is divorced b/c her husband cheated on her. She said when she got a ring on her finger MORE guys started hitting on her.
> 
> The other was a woman at work. I guess I could ask her to explain.


For SOME men its the thrill of the chase. So your friend that got married, once a ring was on her finger, it more than likely made men want to chase her because she was off the market, no longer available. Most people want what they can't have.


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## Blue Moon (Sep 7, 2009)

Yes, because women want you more when you're married. They smell it on you.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## nbmGuy (Apr 26, 2012)

trey69 said:


> For SOME men its the thrill of the chase. So your friend that got married, once a ring was on her finger, it more than likely made men want to chase her because she was off the market, no longer available. Most people want what they can't have.


What about from a man's perspective though? I know you said no already. But I guess I'm not asking, "Have you been unfaithful more since you have gotten married" but I'm asking, "Is there more of a temptation to be unfaithful (even in non sexual ways) after marriage, even if you have never been unfaithful?"


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## Gratitude (Feb 12, 2012)

If you have it in you to cheat, you're going to cheat anyway whether your married or not.

Marriage can bring stress: financial, parenting etc. Spouses may stop trying to look good after they "landed" them. Fights about family, friends and trying to bring everyone together can create tension. There's heaps of reasons in a marriage why people could cheat.

BUT

Whether you have a ring on your finger or not it doesn't change your morals. Saying it's because you got married is just an excuse.


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## Jeff/BC (Apr 1, 2012)

No. I have never had a temptation to be unfaithful... not in a low-sex marriage. Not when dating. And not when married in a wonderful marriage.


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## nbmGuy (Apr 26, 2012)

Gratitude said:


> If you have it in you to cheat, you're going to cheat anyway whether your married or not.
> 
> Marriage can bring stress: financial, parenting etc. Spouses may stop trying to look good after they "landed" them. Fights about family, friends and trying to bring everyone together can create tension. There's heaps of reasons in a marriage why people could cheat.
> 
> ...


What about you personally though? Did you feel more or less of a temptation to be faithful after getting married?


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## Machiavelli (Feb 25, 2012)

nbmGuy said:


> What about from a man's perspective though? I know you said no already. But I guess I'm not asking, "Have you been unfaithful more since you have gotten married" but I'm asking, "Is there more of a temptation to be unfaithful (even in non sexual ways) after marriage, even if you have never been unfaithful?"


Once you have that ring, you're going to get more up front, straight out offers for sex, assuming you're already getting some offers. What you do with those offers is up to you.


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## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

I'm a man, and married for a looong time. And I say that's a ridiculous statement! Anybody can cheat, you don't need to be married. 
Who are these people you spoke to? Whats their marital experience? Look for that information, then judge their opinions. Its good that your asking that question of more people. Hope that helps.


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## Browncoat (Mar 25, 2012)

No not at all. I've been married 15 years, and for all for all of them I've been terribly disappointed with our sex lives (I mean absolutely devastatingly disappointed for most of it), and I've never been tempted to cheat once.

Clearly though it's individual, others obviously have had much different experiences than I have.


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

I find that statement absurd. Marriage is a deeper comittment so your boundaries need to be better.

Married men seem to be more desireable to women than the same man was before marriage. Preselection.

if you are an unfaithful person do not get married.


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## lovelygirl (Apr 15, 2012)

Gratitude said:


> If you have it in you to cheat, you're going to cheat anyway whether your married or not.


I totally agree with this. Some people were born to cheat so if it's in their character to do so then they will. No matter if they cheated once or twice and obviously it doesn't matter if they're married or not. 

I think some men [like your friends] should speak for themselves and not generalize and make men sound like they are the same.


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