# Womens Weighty Issues.



## brendan (Jun 1, 2011)

I have done a few posts over the last couple of months which a few of you wuld have seen, mainly relating to my sexless marriage with wife (we are only 28).

I thought id post this issue up for reponses, When i met her she was 21 with a lovley body (55k.g).

4 years later whilst engaged she crept up to 70k.g due to her terrible diet and probably feeling comfortable within herslef.
NOw over the last year she has equalled me at 82k.g

She is not fat (yet) but id say overweight and this has bothered her over the last year or so.

But what im so so so sick of is her, being upset and calling herslef fat. THEN 3 or 4 hours later go to McDonalds then at night have bottles of coke and ice cream before bed. If she is that upset with her body when cant she/women just eat/excercise?????

It got to the point, last night in bed i said to her " you have a sexy body" and she says "no, i dont, im fat-dont cuddle me like that, cuddle me like this".

Im over this issue of hers that she is having when she seems to have the worst diet ever, no one to blame but herself and i worry that if she does keep going and gets fat 100k.g, ill be so turned off by it....

thoughts?


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

What you describe is one of the main reasons I left my wife. One minute, she's complaining and unhappy about how she looks and feels. The next minute, she stuffing herself with junk food and wine as she lays in front of the TV. Eventually, she was dragging me down with her, and that's where I drew the line. I couldn't make her change her behavior, no matter how supportive I was. I couldn't make her go see her doctor, or get out and exercise. But I could prevent her from dragging me down into her depression.

There's other things that went along with that. But they became larger issues as I fell out of love with her. And even as she appears to have changed parts of her life now, almost a year later, I have no real desire to go back. 

C
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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

Either that, or you'll start losing weight, she won't, she'll get depressed and lose even more self esteem, start eating and drinking more to compensate, and soon your lack of attraction for her won't be an issue because she won't let you anywhere near her.

oh wait... That was my situation. Your mileage may vary.

C
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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

some women(should say people) want a free pass at keeping themselves in healthy shape.

its not rocket science...........eat less and move more.

there is no excuse except laziness for this to happen.

its only a very small % of the people with weight problem that have some sorta of medical condition that make it really difficult to maintain a healthy weight.

the rest of the people are just lazy or don't care if they are unhealthy weight wise.

its not fun if you don't like to exercise. but If the same people would realise how good you feel physicaly and MENTALY when your in shape then maybe they would put some effort into it.

nothing worth while in life is easy.


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

I suppose that's true with anything. My wife chain smokes. Apart from the whole she stinks thing and the $70/week in cigarettes there's that dropping dead early from cancer, stroke, etc. especially since she's already had cancer. 

You can't make people love themselves.


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## chattycathy (Aug 19, 2011)

Well Brendan, I know you have children and there you go.
Some women have a lot of trouble recovering good eating habits and exercise once they have created life.
I think its nature's way of things. Must be.

Anyway, tell your wife you are feeling like you have fallen out of love with her, that her eating habits and depression over her physique is a turn off. That she needs to seek help and turn things around and this issue isn't going to go away. Be honest with her. I don't suspect you are communicating your need for a svelt, happy wife to her. You are avoiding communicating to avoid her wrath or angst. You are just adding to it.

Give her a fighting chance to 'get it together' or to kick you to the curb.

Don't keep your thougths to yourself and pull the rug under from her without warning.


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## I'mInLoveWithMyHubby (Nov 7, 2011)

chillymorn said:


> .
> 
> its only a very small % of the people with weight problem that have some sorta of medical condition that make it really difficult to maintain a healthy weight.


I'm a great example of one of those people. I'm disabled with a neck injury and I can not walk for more then 200 feet without resting. I'm at a normal weight due to watching my calories. I eat 1 bowl of shredded wheat with chia seeds for breakfast and lunch. I also eat a low calorie small portion dinner. I make everything from scratch and if it's a higher calorie dinner, I will eat a small bowl of shredded wheat and the family will go on eating what I made. I do bike on the stationary bike most days for 20-30 minutes, but that's not really exercising. I use to run 36 miles a week.

I'm far from being toned as I once was. I did just lose 20+ pounds this past year from adjusting my diet. Once in a great while I'll substitute the lunch cereal to a bowl of soup with toast. I spend most my day in bed or on the couch with an ice pack on my neck. I'll get up every couple hours and clean what needs to be done. 

My husband is an ironman triathlete, but he thinks I'm thin and that I look great.
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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

why would someone else have to coerce, cajole, beg and lead another person to lose weight (stop smoking, quit alchohol/drugs, etc..) our society needs to take more personal responsibility or deal with the consequences. jeezus this stuff aint that difficult


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

okeydokie said:


> why would someone else have to coerce, cajole, beg and lead another person to lose weight (stop smoking, quit alchohol/drugs, etc..) our society needs to take more personal responsibility or deal with the consequences. jeezus this stuff aint that difficult


WHAT actually hold someone accountable for their actions.

where do you get this stuff from you must be a neanderthal.

I'm so offended I don't what I'm going to do I must go homw and drink copious amounts of alcohol and then some drugs and what the hell beat the wife around a little in the process and its all your fault


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## mousecat (Nov 28, 2011)

People eat fatty food because it tastes nice.
People sit on their backside because they are lazy.

People get sad about being fat, while eating fatty food, and sitting on their backside, because they are stupid.


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## FirstYearDown (Sep 15, 2011)

Wow, looks like some of you have always been skinny and healthy! Seeing a lot of judging people for gaining weight.

I seem to carry all my weight in my stomach. It is the only part of my body that I hate. I recently saw my doctor about weight loss and he warned me about overexerting myself right at the beginning. I tend to push too hard right away and then I can barely move the next morning. I just want to lose my big belly FAST. My doctor said that healthy weight loss is very gradual...there are no quick fixes.

My weaknesses are sweets and starch. I will need to skip those more often, as well as slowly easing into exercise by walking. Just today, I took a 20 minute walk. Also, the meds I will be on for the rest of my life cause constipation and weight gain. This contributes to the preggo look. I have already started to eat more fruit and bran to get things moving. 

I will get there, it is just going to take way too much time. I am not looking forward to eating less rich food, since eating is one of my great pleasures.


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## brendan (Jun 1, 2011)

tried the encouraging of esting more healthy but it didnt work.

i am doing what an earlier response said which is, I have been looking agter myself physically and not worrying about her as i havde tried for a while to help her. Ive hit the gym twice a week and go for a relaxing 30minute run once a week. NOt pushing myself too hard but i feel great.

But ive never been overwight as im not lazy try and watch my diet, although im not saying i have the best diet either. I hope she sees im enjoying being a really fit 82k,g man and she wants to join in whilst she is now a plump but not fat (yet)82k.g lady.


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## cloudwithleggs (Oct 13, 2011)

what about those weighty guys , the only time I am over weight is when my thyroids out and then it only put 14lbs on me. I workout watch my food intake and don't smoke or drink.

I think being fat is a life style choice it is one I don't choose to follow , my husband has always been overweight and I am at the point I just can't stand it at any more.

fat men and sex what can I say , guys it gives you a very small **** and different postions are difficult , l love sex but fat man are a huge turn off.


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## StStephen65 (Dec 13, 2011)

It just makes everything else bigger, pun intended. If one partner is fat/out of shape/whatever and won't address it and take care of themselves, what do you think they'll do about other issues in the marriage? If there's no problem to them there, likely they see no problems elsewhere. Also, at least for me, the weight gain and half hearted attempts to lose it ( going to gym is cancelled out by giant grilled cheese and ice cream!!!!) exacerbate the other little things. Huge, again pun intended, dilemma: how do you fix sexless marriage when you are not sexually attracted to person you are supposed to have sex with????? Personally I am trying hard to understand that issue and figure it out.
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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

FirstYearDown said:


> Wow, looks like some of you have always been skinny and healthy! Seeing a lot of judging people for gaining weight.


im slightly overweight, and guess what, its 100% my fault. its not my wifes fault, its not her job to make me feel good about myself so i will want to change, its my issue to fix, for me and for her. she is also slightly overweight, and thats her issue, or is that my issue to fix also?

i get weary of reading how men affect or even cause their wives to be overweight and that its up to them to help their wives lose. reading the last lady poster talking about her husband being overweight and what a turnoff it is for her was refreshing.


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## FirstYearDown (Sep 15, 2011)

okeydokie said:


> im slightly overweight, and guess what, its 100% my fault. its not my wifes fault, its not her job to make me feel good about myself so i will want to change, its my issue to fix, for me and for her. she is also slightly overweight, and thats her issue, or is that my issue to fix also?
> Did you see me write that it was YOUR issue to fix?
> 
> i get weary of reading how men affect or even cause their wives to be overweight and that its up to them to help their wives lose. Again, I did not say that.reading the last lady poster talking about her husband being overweight and what a turnoff it is for her was refreshing.


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

my apologies as i do see where i failed to make my point, which was prompted by your comment.

i am not a perpetually skinny and healthy person trying to judge those that are not. i am a person who tries to live their life based around personal responsibility and accountability. i have seen alot responses on numerous threads about weight that basically put the onus on the partner of the over weight person to help them lose weight (sorry to say it but especially where the woman is over weight). i think a large part of our society has transformed into the "not my fault" mentality. it sickens me.

incidentally FYD, i have read your story about your unfortunate injury. i dont classify that the same way. you obviously have the desire to improve, but you are obviously limited.


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## Tall Average Guy (Jul 26, 2011)

okeydokie said:


> my apologies as i do see where i failed to make my point, which was prompted by your comment.
> 
> i am not a perpetually skinny and healthy person trying to judge those that are not. i am a person who tries to live their life based around personal responsibility and accountability. i have seen alot responses on numerous threads about weight that basically put the onus on the partner of the over weight person to help them lose weight (sorry to say it but especially where the woman is over weight). i think a large part of our society has transformed into the "not my fault" mentality. it sickens me.
> 
> incidentally FYD, i have read your story about your unfortunate injury. i dont classify that the same way. you obviously have the desire to improve, but you are obviously limited.


I expect much of that is because it is the spouse coming here for suggestions, not the peron that is overweight. I take these suggestions as ways you can support and encourage your spouse to look after their weight. 

At the end of the day, however, it is like everything else - you can't change a person, they need to want to change.


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

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Can you believe that this is the same woman? 

Several years ago she was fat and ugly in men's eyes. She was also a big joke in China because she liked to show. Look at her now, slim and beautiful, who doesn't want this? 

People might want to know what kind of surgery she did or what kind of medicine she took. Her secret is nothing special. Go jogging in the morning everyday and continue for several years. Eat more fruit and vegetables, less meat. She still eats good food since food is important to her. Just balanced diet. 

People look for all kinds of excuses not to control their weight. Little do they know that they will benefit a lot if they stop looking for excuses.

It's easy. Just stop being lazy!


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

Tall Average Guy said:


> I expect much of that is because it is the spouse coming here for suggestions, not the peron that is overweight. I take these suggestions as ways you can support and encourage your spouse to look after their weight.
> 
> At the end of the day, however, it is like everything else - you can't change a person, they need to want to change.


i agree, but some threads do morph into why it is the fault of the person asking for advice, "its no wonder why your wife is overweight" type comments from a few.


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## FirstYearDown (Sep 15, 2011)

greenpearl said:


> ªÜ»T©j©j½G¨*¦¨¥\¤j®iÅÖ®z¸y¨* ÅSªÓ¨q»L¦A²{§O¼ËS¦±½u - ®T¼Ö - °ê»Ú½u¤W
> 
> ªÜ»T©j©j½G¨*¦¨¥\¤j®iÅÖ®z¸y¨* ÅSªÓ¨q»L¦A²{§O¼ËS¦±½u - ®T¼Ö - °ê»Ú½u¤W
> 
> ...


When there are medical issues, it is not as easy as you think. 
Sometimes people have to take medication that causes weight gain or slowing of metabolism. 
There are also challenges with mobility and heart conditions.
It is very ignorant and misinformed of you to say that ALL weight problems come from laziness. I suggest you do some reading and educate yourself.
Not everybody is blessed with your good health.


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## FirstYearDown (Sep 15, 2011)

Angel5112 said:


> I agree and disagree with you. I agree that it isn't as easy as everyone thinks and there is medication and genetics to think about. However, I DO think that most cases obesity (not just being overweight) stem from laziness. If people cared enough they would get up and do something about it, if they weren't lazy or just didn't care/it doesn't bother them. I never mentioned genetics. I do agree that obesity is worse than being overweight. I am not obese, just chunky. I am doing something about it though. :smthumbup:
> 
> I have a friend who has been obese (now 300+ lbs) her whole life. She went on a diet (slim for life) and lost about 150lbs. They had her doing things like eating 5 plain hamburgers (no bread, just the hamburger) for lunch and doing all the weight loss herbs and pills. Of course these things definitely made her lose the weight but they also caused her to put back on what she lost and about 50lbs more after she ended the diet, because it taught her nothing about healthy eating or portion control. Now she is doing it the right way, portion control, healthy eating, fruit and veggie servings every day, and more importantly, exercise. I have started to drink more water and replace unhealthy snacks with fruit. I have also began to go for a thirty minute walk every day. My doctor has made these suggestions.:smthumbup:
> 
> For the people who have health problems that prevent them from walking/running/weight lifting, there is water aerobics. That is what my 75 year old grandmother (who is 5' tall and weighs 275lbs) does. She also is on a diet of only 1400 calories/day. She is slowly but surely dropping weight. She has heart problem, has had several knee and hip surgeries, and is diabetic. There is always a way, you just need to have the will.


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## GoingNowhere (Nov 13, 2011)

As a woman that has let herself go before, can I put my two cents in?

I did nothing about it because I was afraid that no matter how hard I tried to please my husband, I would fail. Gaining weight was something to put the blame on, instead of "myself".

He only seemed to care about me in the bedroom, or when I got dolled up.. It had bern years since he hugged me and told me how much he loved me while I was wearing pajamas and had bed head. 

I started to feel like I could only get his attention if I looked the part, and it made me wonder about our future. I won't be a 23 yr old forever... I will grow old and someday my hair will turn gray.

I alone, the me inside, won't be able to keep him happy... If he only loves me on the outside...

I began to lose wright for the wrong reasons, because I was certain he was going to leave me, I lost weight so I could believe another man might want me.

53lbs... I weigh less than before we got together.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

GoingNowhere said:


> As a woman that has let herself go before, can I put my two cents in?
> 
> I did nothing about it because I was afraid that no matter how hard I tried to please my husband, I would fail. Gaining weight was something to put the blame on, instead of "myself".
> 
> ...


chicken or egg again.

I think most men could say she only loves me when I am emotional she dosn't love the real me.

my poit being is we should love eachother because of our gender differences and except them for the qualities we don't have.

but instead we get stuck with our own thought process on the things that we selfishly want.

and in doing so we should realise that you have to put your self outside of your comfort zone as a way to really show how much you love eachother. 


yes a man should show his emotional side but women need to realise that its difficult for most men to do. and they should encourage it be being suportive and not critisize the way or manner in which he dose it.

on the flip side women should also travel outside their comfort zone. and men should realise it was difficult for them to do.

and then the comfort zone starts to get bigger and bigger and before you know it it one big happy comfort zone.

I guess in a perfect world thats how it would work.


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## I'mInLoveWithMyHubby (Nov 7, 2011)

Angel5112 said:


> For the people who have health problems that prevent them from walking/running/weight lifting, there is water aerobics. That is what my 75 year old grandmother (who is 5' tall and weighs 275lbs) does. She also is on a diet of only 1400 calories/day. She is slowly but surely dropping weight. She has heart problem, has had several knee and hip surgeries, and is diabetic. There is always a way, you just need to have the will.


I disagree. My neck/spine injury does not allow me to do any exercise without going into unbearable pain. I have the will. I have the motivation. Trust me, I'd be doing any cardio exercise if able! I love to exercise and even though my injury stopped me in my tracks, I still have the motivation and will. I use to run 36 miles every week for years.

I'm literally STUCK laying in bed or on the couch most of the day. I'm a prisoner in my own body. I do however, must learn to live like this without getting depressed. I do bike, but I can not move my upper half of my body. I can not walk over 200 feet without resting. I do have a handicap parking permit and I'm only 37.

I do eat healthy. We do not eat greasy foods here. Our children are fast food deprived. 90% of the food I cook is from scratch.

Before I broke my neck, I gained 100 pounds with each child. I loved to eat. I had gestational dibeaties along with that, but I would only lose 16 pounds of the 100 I gained. I could easily run it off. My third child I started running 3 miles one week after delivering her. I'm not quite sure how I gained the weight from being pregnant in the first place. 

When I broke my neck, I gained 30 pounds in a few months. I stayed the same weight for a while. My problem was that I was not getting dressed and wearing pj's daily. My MIL made a comment on my weight gain, I felt bad, so I changed my eating habits and I'm where I'm at now. I'm getting older and my metabolism is surly slowing down.

I'm grateful for my husband who love me for who I am. He never once had a problem with any of my weight gains. If he did, he would of told me. We have great communication with each other.

I would give anything to exercise again. I raced in a few triathlons as well. I miss being toned also.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

I'mInLoveWithMyHubby said:


> I disagree. My neck/spine injury does not allow me to do any exercise without going into unbearable pain. I have the will. I have the motivation. Trust me, I'd be doing any cardio exercise if able! I love to exercise and even though my injury stopped me in my tracks, I still have the motivation and will. I use to run 36 miles every week for years.
> 
> I'm literally STUCK laying in bed or on the couch most of the day. I'm a prisoner in my own body. I do however, must learn to live like this without getting depressed. I do bike, but I can not move my upper half of my body. I can not walk over 200 feet without resting. I do have a handicap parking permit and I'm only 37.
> 
> ...


you must be mentaly strong to endure such a lifestyle change.

maybe its time to be revaluated by a different dr.



maybe some new technology has been discovered that would help.


best of luck.


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## GoingNowhere (Nov 13, 2011)

chillymorn said:


> chicken or egg again.
> 
> I think most men could say she only loves me when I am emotional she dosn't love the real me.
> 
> ...


But chilly,

What beauty can never fade? Or at least we have full control over it NOT fading.

Beauty from the inside, or outside?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## GoingNowhere (Nov 13, 2011)

A woman jumping outside her comfort zone to be the "sexy and sex driven" partner she suspects her husband wants her to be is hard because she knows she will outgrow that sexy appearance.

A man jumping out of his comfort zone to show emotional attraction should be comforting because that is something you can always have, never lose.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

GoingNowhere said:


> But chilly,
> 
> What beauty can never fade? Or at least we have full control over it NOT fading.
> 
> ...


totally un true inside beauty can fade as everybody is always changing and thats a fact.

many people who were once beautifull on the inside become ulgy over time.


and I know some people who look better with time and maturity than they did in their youth.

thats just your opinion or how some women think.


for example my wife is more beautifull after having children even with a little extra skin and sagging breast.


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

hard to look through someone elses eyes.


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## GoingNowhere (Nov 13, 2011)

chillymorn said:


> totally un true inside beauty can fade as everybody is always changing and thats a fact.
> 
> many people who were once beautifull on the inside become ulgy over time.
> 
> ...



But we can control it, if we want that inner beauty back, can't we.

We can't make our skin taught again by exercise, but we can exercise our mind and heart..
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## YupItsMe (Sep 29, 2011)

Married Man Sex Life: Destablizing Your Relationship For Fun And *****


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

GoingNowhere said:


> But we can control it, if we want that inner beauty back, can't we.
> 
> no always, its person spicific. as we age our mind also ages and can fail as well as are bodies
> 
> ...


or change our thought on what a beautifull person looks like. 

I don't know about you but as I age I no longer look for or at much younger women and think wow shes beautifull. it kinda creeps me out to be thinking of younger women in that reguards.

but instead I find myself looking at women my age and thinking that women took care of herself and has aged wonderfully.

I could be wrong by in conversations with my male friends they say the same.


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## GoingNowhere (Nov 13, 2011)

chillymorn said:


> or change our thought on what a beautifull person looks like.
> 
> I don't know about you but as I age I no longer look for or at much younger women and think wow shes beautifull. it kinda creeps me out to be thinking of younger women in that reguards.
> 
> ...


Hey you can tell me that you love your wife for who she is, and see beauty for more than what's on the outside until you are blue in the face.

It doesn't matter if I or you believe this, what matters is if your wife feels it.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

chicken or egg chicken or egg chicken or egg


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## GoingNowhere (Nov 13, 2011)

chillymorn said:


> chicken or egg chicken or egg chicken or egg


So is your pride so great you can't be the first?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

I feel like I have been the first to start.

so I guess In her nonresponce that was my answer.


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## tjohnson (Mar 10, 2010)

Eating/drinking is likely being caused by unhappyness. Regardless, not acceptable but, see if the cause can be determined and treated/resolved. 

You should take the lead as others have noted. Be active/eat right and set the tone. Hopefully, she will follow. 

I have a slugish metabolism so i can understand. One thing i have learned is that controlling food intake is the most important factor. Unless you have 7-15 hours a week to burn off calories and the inclination to stick with it you need to create a calorie deficit to reduce weight. counting calories is dead boring/tedious but, you have to understand how to eat less effectively. Weight watchers is similar as it forces you to eat less. 

There are 1000s of tips online. Good luck


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## justkeepswmg (Dec 16, 2011)

Interesting that this is my first post, but here we go....I struggle with my weight and it has drastically impacted my marriage. But it is not nearly as black and white as some of you make it seem. 

You (I) put on a few pounds, hubby doesn't like it so you lose it. You put on a few pounds, hubby gets irritated, you get irritated with him not loving you for you, you put on more weight. You feel like crap, yes even lazy because of the weight, so you put on more weight. Hubby stops wanting sex or affection, is embarrassed being with you so you eat your feelings and gain more weight. It's an awful ugly cycle. Is it possible to get off the couch and make changes? Of course it is! But when your self esteem is so wracked because you feel unloved and unwanted it's just hard. That's it, just hard. 

My only advice to the wife who is struggling with her weight is to do it for herself. Don't do it because husband wants it do it because you deserve to be fi and healthy.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Enchantment (May 11, 2011)

Well, there have certainly been a lot of 'weighty' posts recently - just in time for the festive holiday season and all of its attendant eating. 

Honestly, I don't know how you would even bring up this subject to a person without hurting them. I would think if you did bring it up, they would just feel bad, and reach for the holiday cookies, fudge, and ice cream to feel better.

I think you can do a lot by being a good role model, being supportive, try and go shopping together, cooking together, walking together. Try and make it a way that you can connect with each other. Make a commitment to changing the eating and health habits of your entire family.

And I don't agree that people who have weight problems are just plain lazy. I think there may be that for some people, but not for all.

For some people, it's an emotional thing - eating releases those same kind of 'feel good' hormones that other pleasurable activities release and they use eating as a coping mechanism.

For others, there are bona fide health problems. Two years ago I had gotten to the point where I told my husband I could eat a lettuce leaf everyday and I would never be able to lose a single pound. I had never been like that before in my life. Found out I was severely hypothyroid. Once I got that under control with medication I will take forever on, I was able to lose weight more easily and actually had the energy to exercise again.

So, I don't think we should judge people and their motivations, or lack thereof, based upon their weight - we don't know what's going on in their lives.

Best wishes.


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

FirstYearDown said:


> When there are medical issues, it is not as easy as you think.
> Sometimes people have to take medication that causes weight gain or slowing of metabolism.
> There are also challenges with mobility and heart conditions.
> It is very ignorant and misinformed of you to say that ALL weight problems come from laziness. I suggest you do some reading and educate yourself.
> Not everybody is blessed with your good health.


You have taught me a lot. 

I am learning from you!

I am learning what not to do from reading your posts!

You can look at your big belly and be proud of yourself and look for all kinds of excuses not to do anything. Not my business. 

Yes, I am ignorant, especially about people like you!


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## FirstYearDown (Sep 15, 2011)

I have already mentioned my diet and activity changes, so I don't know where you get the idea that I do nothing but make excuses. :scratchhead:

More than one person has pointed out reasons why losing weight is harder for some and not always a matter of laziness. Maybe you would do better if you learned to read, rather than make snarky comments when you are proven wrong. 

Keep being too arrogant to understand that you do not know everything.
http://www.medicinenet.com/hypothyroidism/article.htm
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/bipolar-medications-and-weight-gain/AN02062


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## FirstYearDown (Sep 15, 2011)

Enchantment said:


> Well, there have certainly been a lot of 'weighty' posts recently - just in time for the festive holiday season and all of its attendant eating.
> 
> Honestly, I don't know how you would even bring up this subject to a person without hurting them. I would think if you did bring it up, they would just feel bad, and reach for the holiday cookies, fudge, and ice cream to feel better.
> 
> ...


:iagree::iagree:
Too bad greenpearl does not have enough compassion to understand such things.


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

FirstYearDown said:


> I have already mentioned my diet and activity changes, so I don't know where you get the idea that I do nothing but make excuses. :scratchhead:
> 
> More than one person has pointed out reasons why losing weight is harder for some and not always a matter of laziness. Maybe you would do better if you learned to read, rather than make snarky comments when you are proven wrong.
> 
> ...


Just to let you know, being overweight causes one's health issues.


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## FirstYearDown (Sep 15, 2011)

Did you read Enchantment's post or any of the links I recommended?

Darling, being overweight does not cause thyroid issues or mental health problems. These types of health challenges have NOTHING AT ALL DO WITH BEING TOO BIG. :rofl::rofl: 

Carrying too much weight can lead to heart disease and diabetes. It does not lead to _every _illness.

There is much wisdom to be found in empathy and humility. I strongly suggest you try to develop these attributes, so that you may become more wise. 

I have noticed that the dumbest people are often the loudest, especially about subjects they don't know anything about.


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

Our body is designed only for a certain amount of weight. When our weight is over that, our organs have to work harder. After overworking for some time, they tend to fall apart. Then you have health problems. That's my theory. 

In order to be healthy, we can't be over weight, we can't over work.


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## AbsolutelyFree (Jan 28, 2011)

Hmm, well...

I'd have to agree that many health problems can be related to being overweight. Perhaps not directly, but as a consequence. FirstYearDown mentioned that weight has nothing to do with mental health. True, perhaps. But still, regular exercise is considered to have a strong positive effect on depression. This doesn't really imply that obesity would be linked to depression, 

Also, I know that as a man, exercise really helps me a lot in those 'manly ways.' Having a healthy cardiovascular system gives better bloodflow, which includes to that important place. Strength training by lifting weights is also a proven way for a man to raise the testesterone level in his body.

While obesity may not be the cause of many conditions and diseases, I do wonder to what extent it aggravates them. For example, I have read about how so many children in the United States are being treated for ADD and ADHD. This condition is made greatly worse by ones diet. When kids eat a lot of greasy, unhealthy food and don't eat any vegetables, it make sthe problem much worse. Maybe 50 or 60 years ago, there were just as many people who had ADD/ADHD, but it didn't cause as big a problem for them because they had much healthier diets.


I even wonder the same about hypothyroidism. I have a good friend with this problem. He is very much overweight and has a hard time with oversleeping, "getting going" in the morning, etc. But he eats fast-food almost every meal and drinks bottles and bottles of high sugar soda every day. Even though he has the hypothryoid condition, I think that his situation could be greatly improved if he could make himself eat healthier and exercise more.


I'm not a doctor of course. This is just a rambling post of my observations and musings.


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## FirstYearDown (Sep 15, 2011)

AbsolutelyFree said:


> Hmm, well...
> 
> I'd have to agree that many health problems can be related to being overweight. Perhaps not directly, but as a consequence. Yeah, that is why I mentioned diabetes and heart disease.FirstYearDown mentioned that weight has nothing to do with mental health. True, perhaps. But still, regular exercise is considered to have a strong positive effect on depression.What on earth will exercise do for a schizophrenic or a multiple personality? This doesn't really imply that obesity would be linked to depression.
> 
> ...


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

So I have this book about circus side shows in the 1890's. And the fat man or the fat woman frankly, looks almost normal compared to 30% of the people you see at the mall. A hundred years ago 400lbs was some kind of world record. Now that's just the 4th person in line on their electric scooter @ Walmart.


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