# CrossDresser, your thoughts



## cloudwithleggs (Oct 13, 2011)

I have no issue normally with this thought, till the other day. Well I am chatting to this guy and yes he is for real and he says he wants to send me a pic, I think naughty pic and mmmm good.

Not good because it is him just his ass, thighs is all I can see in skirt, suspenders, stockings, if it had been a woman I would of been turned on but it is a man dressed in womens lingerie, no turn on for me.

He says he is not a crossdresser, just likes colours, fabric and such, I say he is not telling himself the truth, why on earth would he think a woman would be turned on by pics like that?

For sex I like my men to be men and women to be women.

That and he'd be taking all my lingerie to try....


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## Jeff/BC (Apr 1, 2012)

I'm pretty comfortable with the kink community so I'm hardly shocked by the word "cross dresser". But my thought is that this is confusing. It seems to me that if you're male and you're wearing women's clothes then you are cross dressing. I can't quite figure out how not to read that as self-denial which would be a red flag for me.

Then, of course, there is the wisdom of sending such a photo to a person who is almost certainly not likely to be receptive to it. 

So my guess is that that is exactly his kink. For some reason he gets off on sending photos of himself in women's clothes to straight vanilla women. Heh, at this point I've come to the conclusion that you can name anything and someone, somewhere has managed to eroticize it LOL.

And yes, he'd be taking all your lingerie


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

Maybe he's just weeding out the ones that aren't into him early, rather than wasting time for both of you?

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Jeff/BC (Apr 1, 2012)

PBear said:


> Maybe he's just weeding out the ones that aren't into him early, rather than wasting time for both of you?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Perhaps. But honestly isn't that roughly the equivalent of sending a woman a close up of your package just to weed out the wrong ones early? Well OK... it's a strategy... I suppose....


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## Lordhavok (Mar 14, 2012)

people do all kinds of weird stuff. Just because he dresses like a woman dont mean he's gay. Lots of straight guys get their kicks dressing like a woman. If thats your thing, whatever.


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## cloudwithleggs (Oct 13, 2011)

Well its not my thing in a potential lover, no issues otherwise but i like my men more alpha, not comparing lingerie less they want it on me.

He isn't gay, but is in total denial about cross dressing saying he is not one, and apparently other women like him wearing lingerie, well i say good for them because i don't, i think they may only be online women and they are not being truthful to him.

He took the fact i like lingerie (i am female) that we had something in common and that i'd like to see lingerie on him, wrong, wrong and just so wrong. :scratchhead: 

I had sent him already semi full nudes including face, so expected something to equal it, he has sent me a pic of his package now but i am not interested, would prefer full nudes including face, body parts could be anyones, blah :lol: :rofl:


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## Complexity (Dec 31, 2011)

cloudwithleggs said:


> Not good because it is him just his ass, thighs is all I can see in skirt, suspenders, stockings, if it had been a woman I would of been turned on but it is a man dressed in womens lingerie, no turn on for me.


I lol'd at this and I'm inclined to agree 

He's evidently a cross dresser, nothing wrong with it. Don't know why he's more comfortable sending pics of himself in skirts than to actually come to terms with this identity.


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## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

if his legs look better in stockings than yours then steer well clear


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Yea, it wouldn't get me turned on...but he'd be fun to go shopping with!


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## Jeff/BC (Apr 1, 2012)

cloudwithleggs said:


> Well its not my thing in a potential lover, no issues otherwise but i like my men more alpha, not comparing lingerie less they want it on me.


*chuckles* Careful there. I'm fine with your personal preferences... we all have them and are entitled to them. 

But as I remember there are photos on the internet of me in both my wife's white wedding panties and then when I got razzed for being too "pure" a red G-string. I'm still pretty secure in my "alpha-ness" as well my malehood. I've also gone to work in a skirt (don't you hate it when you lose bets?). As I remember, my basic psyche did not change and I was still one of those "better a friend than an enemy" people.

MOSTLY, I'd say to you that your idea of "alpha" is obviously not even skin deep... it's clothes deep. I can tell you that a genuinely dominant personality would tell you to keep your opinions of what sort of clothing he needs to wear to prove his dominance to yourself. Have you actually ever been around an "alpha"?

I was too lazy but man I was tempted to run back and grab a pair of my wife's panties and slip them on as I typed all that just to be a pill.

Man, we SERIOUSLY, SERIOUSLY need men's lib. Either that or the next time you put on slacks I'm going to question your basic ability to be female.

*edited to add*
Man, if I couldn't walk into an unfamiliar conference room with total strangers wearing a flouncy summer dress and sandals and STILL take over the meeting if I chose to then I wouldn't really think of myself as particularly alpha.


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## Almostrecovered (Jul 14, 2011)

he was testing you to see if you like his fetish

if you don't no biggie, move on


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Whoa. That's a lot there against the OP just because she doesn't want a man in lingerie 

Sure, you gave a disclaimer that she is allowed to like what she likes but then got all up on her for not liking it.

I don't like men in tighty whities. Or polo shirts. Or khakis.

Preferences. Everyone has them.


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## Jeff/BC (Apr 1, 2012)

that_girl said:


> Sure, you gave a disclaimer that she is allowed to like what she likes but then got all up on her for not liking it.


Then you misinterpreted. I am truly, completely perfectly fine with her personal preferences. But when you start associating basic personality qualities to clothing... seriously? You are seriously going to suggest that that's reasonable? So then if I were to say that I prefer brunettes because I like smart women you'd be fine with that?

I wouldn't even have remarked on it all had she not included the "alpha" part. The "not my thing" part is totally understandable. I don't find men in women's clothing to be attractive either.


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## cloudwithleggs (Oct 13, 2011)

yeah but they weren't slacks it was full on lingerie, which in my book is sexual, or would you say women don't wear lingerie to feel sexy or be sexual, so his lingerie wearing is not sexual, but i think it is. why he thought he could impress me with pics like that i'll never know i think he was just getting his rocks off.

He lured me in saying he was going to give me something naughty, he so lied or has a strange perception of what females want.

I gave him semi full nudes and he returns with that, i must say it is a first, so what do you think he was really getting at?

If it is not sexual what the hell is it for?

Meh he showed me his **** in the end, when he realised i weren't impressed, by this time it was wasted on me.

I like alpha dominant men for sex its a turn on and it pushes my buttons and it is more than skin deep, not a man that dresses in lingerie, that to me is omega, he told me he likes queening  don't forget this is just my opinion and if you think me shallow, do i give a **** no, i laughed the whole way through your post. :lol:

Have i ever been around an alpha? yeah me, i am 98% more aggressive than my peers and can be very dominate in the bedroom, it's difficult to find males that are not intimidated, let alone have a male that is dressed in lingerie (i am ****ing visual sexually), what am i supposed to do with him, boring and a turn off, i'll own him, may be fun for a while then what.

As for your panties, skirt wearing it seems you did it for fun, not sexual and that is fine, i have no issue with it. 

yeah and pics or it didn't happen


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

Preferences are preferences, completely agree.

If I allow myself to enter an alternate universe for the sake of this thread, if he could work it, there's a chance I'd be intrigued. Yes, I had a crush on Frankenfurter as a child. Is it something I'd be seeking? Nope. But in your situation, intrigued would be the answer.


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## Jeff/BC (Apr 1, 2012)

cloudwithleggs said:


> As for your panties, skirt wearing it seems you did it for fun, not sexual and that is fine, i have no issue with it.


*nods* My observation from the thread where I posted the panties photos was that different women registered it differently. Some of them saw me as less dominant (their word for alpha) because I had emasculated myself. Some saw me as more dominant because my sense of self wasn't dependent on wardrobe.

The takeaway for me is that there is no such thing as an "alpha male" when used as an external evaluation. It's all subjective.



> yeah and pics or it didn't happen


LOLOL... man, you sound just like the kinksters. I was informed (and I agree) that my hairy male ass didn't do the thong justice at all. 

I still maintain though, that whatever my reasons for wearing whatever I chose to -- sexual or otherwise -- my sense of self and my sense of "I'm in control of my life" would not be affected. Sure, other people's perceptions of me would change. But mine wouldn't and that's really all that matters when it comes time to find out who's alpha and who's not.

On the other hand, I would absolutely expect my dating pool to diminish drastically. That's what happens when you're unusual. Lots of women won't find it appealing.


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## diwali123 (Feb 17, 2012)

My h is a CD-er. If he had sent me pics like that out of the blue in the beginning I would have run for the hills. You don't just sprung that on someone. I think this man might define a cross dresser as someone who dresses as a woman completely including makeup, boobs and wig. Some people just wear lingerie as a fetish and some people like my h do it for fun and it's not sexual.
I see his bravery as being alpha. He is so secure in his masculinity that he doesn't care what other people think. 
But when he's fully dressed I don't get turned on usually.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Candida (May 7, 2012)

I have been with a guy for 6 years, I never knew he was a crossdresser. I know quit a bit of these subject I have been a very supportive partner. 
At the beggining we had great sex, kincky in many ways. I thought it was ok. To make the story short (if you want to know about my experience read my thresd.

They are two kinds of crossdressers, the ones that likes to just dress as a girl and the other type that wants to look, feel like a girl. From this type my suggestion is to run away...these type have gender disphoria mine partner is one and he/she in in denial. When I said feel I mean feel in everyway, they need the Dic&** if they like better than the puss%^^ what is that??? Bi??? I don't think so, they are call TS or TG = transsexual. Mine partners likes and turn him/her on to see a Girl with Dic&**.
I thought it was cool at the beggining when it was only the make up the dress, we had lot of fun going out.
But when things starting turning into more permanent changes, he wanted real boobs, hips, complete face transformation, I was worried. I asked, but the answered all the time was, I love my dic%^^ I will never cut it off.
I have great respect for everybody, but I think is mean, not to be honest with their partner. Keeping the best of both worlds!
As a woman I feel bad, honestly I think it is my own fault. Why I didn't run away? Well after 7 years I was and I still am maddly inlove with this person, who really does not care about me. He/she is more in to be a girl. I can see the ending, he will end up like a *****. Is so sad because he is an intelligent person when he is a guy, but he turns into a woman all the lazyness and selfiness come out. The only thing important is to look as a girl and flirt and of course to feel like a *****...
Why am I saying this? Because I still love that person but I can not get out of these destructive relatinship. I can compite with a woman but I can not compite with a ****.
I wish he/she will still dressing only, it was fun, but he told me he likes **** but he is not gay!. What is the difference?


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## whatsup (May 7, 2012)

i'd hit it but i'm kinda bi :x


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## dubbizle (Jan 15, 2012)

[Maybe he's just weeding out the ones that aren't into him early, rather than wasting time for both of you?]

I am not into cross dressing but I think this is what people should do,be upfront right off so the other person can decide if they want to be with you or not.
There are too many stories on here where people find out their partner is into something that was hidden and are not accepting so I am with this person and say put it out there right away so the other person can stay or go.


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## Sanity (Mar 7, 2011)

Lordhavok said:


> people do all kinds of weird stuff. Just because he dresses like a woman dont mean he's gay. Lots of straight guys get their kicks dressing like a woman. If thats your thing, whatever.


Ah no. If you dress like a woman you have gay tendencies that you are in the process of acting on. 

OP: Move on from this nutbag. Plenty of sexually and mentally healthy men out their that won't try on your clothes and look better in them.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Only time I crossdress is to give wifey a good stomach-wrenching laugh


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