# Naked Pictures



## ktheuerkauf (Jan 2, 2017)

My husband and I are trying to rebuild our marriage. We've drifted apart for several reasons and are trying to reconnect. A few months ago, I discovered that my husband was hanging out with a woman (half his age) from his volunteer job on a regular basis and did not tell me. I found out that their relationship was on the flirtatious side. He ended it with her, even though he said that it was nothing and he was seeking support from other people because I was not providing it. I own up that and am trying to be more supportive and am working hard on being a better person and wife. Flash forward to now. I was charging my phone on our computer and found naked pictures of him, including pictures of his penis. I asked him about this and he said he felt unattractive to me, so he shared his pictures online to see whether or not he was attractive. To be honest, it's sickening to me. Though I'm not a prude, I have a moral code and think he crossed the line. I understand why he did it and that informs me that I need to make him feel more desirable, but I still think it's inappropriate. After his relationship with the woman and now this, I'm questioning the kind of person he is. We're Christians and he won't go to church with me or talk about God with me anymore. Maybe I'm overreacting and guys do this all the time. I only have sisters and only had a few guy friends growing up, so I'm unsure of the guy world. Any thoughts or advice would be helpful.


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## GatorXP (Oct 1, 2017)

ktheuerkauf said:


> My husband and I are trying to rebuild our marriage. We've drifted apart for several reasons and are trying to reconnect. A few months ago, I discovered that my husband was hanging out with a woman (half his age) from his volunteer job on a regular basis and did not tell me. I found out that their relationship was on the flirtatious side. He ended it with her, even though he said that it was nothing and he was seeking support from other people because I was not providing it. I own up that and am trying to be more supportive and am working hard on being a better person and wife. Flash forward to now. I was charging my phone on our computer and found naked pictures of him, including pictures of his penis. I asked him about this and he said he felt unattractive to me, so he shared his pictures online to see whether or not he was attractive. To be honest, it's sickening to me. Though I'm not a prude, I have a moral code and think he crossed the line. I understand why he did it and that informs me that I need to make him feel more desirable, but I still think it's inappropriate. After his relationship with the woman and now this, I'm questioning the kind of person he is. We're Christians and he won't go to church with me or talk about God with me anymore. Maybe I'm overreacting and guys do this all the time. I only have sisters and only had a few guy friends growing up, so I'm unsure of the guy world. Any thoughts or advice would be helpful.


Hey K
The first thing I would say is that he explanation for the existence of the pictures is very odd. As a generality I would say there are most likely other reasons for the existence of these photos.

All i will say about your morality issue is you are certainly entitled to be with someone who's morality you feel matches your own. 
Morality in general basically just my Ps me off tho as it's just based a person's beliefs and we all how true those are.

Sent from my SM-G935V using Tapatalk


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

ktheuerkauf said:


> My husband and I are trying to rebuild our marriage. We've drifted apart for several reasons and are trying to reconnect. A few months ago, I discovered that my husband was hanging out with a woman (half his age) from his volunteer job on a regular basis and did not tell me. I found out that their relationship was on the flirtatious side. He ended it with her, even though he said that it was nothing and he was seeking support from other people because I was not providing it. I own up that and am trying to be more supportive and am working hard on being a better person and wife. Flash forward to now. I was charging my phone on our computer and found naked pictures of him, including pictures of his penis. I asked him about this and he said he felt unattractive to me, so he shared his pictures online to see whether or not he was attractive. To be honest, it's sickening to me. Though I'm not a prude, I have a moral code and think he crossed the line. I understand why he did it and that informs me that I need to make him feel more desirable, but I still think it's inappropriate. After his relationship with the woman and now this, I'm questioning the kind of person he is. We're Christians and he won't go to church with me or talk about God with me anymore. Maybe I'm overreacting and guys do this all the time. I only have sisters and only had a few guy friends growing up, so I'm unsure of the guy world. Any thoughts or advice would be helpful.


Force him to show you exactly where — and with whom — he shared the pictures online.

If he won’t do that, kick him out on his ass.


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## growing_weary (Jul 23, 2017)

That's a crappy "reason" to share nudes and can quickly escalate to emotional shenanigans if someone takes the bait.


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

Uh, no!

He has to go!

He sent those pictures out.
He sent them out as bait.
He is a cheat and a lout.

The pictures are bait.
He is hovering, lies in wait.

For the female sucker fish.
To nibble, take his dish.

A single worm attached to a married Blowfish.


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## Mindy123 (Nov 30, 2014)

GusPolinski said:


> Force him to show you exactly where — and with whom — he shared the pictures online.
> 
> If he won’t do that, kick him out on his ass.


That reason sounds like bull****. I'd do some more investigating.


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

Mindy123 said:


> *That reason sounds like bull****.* I'd do some more investigating.


That’s because it is.


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## GatorXP (Oct 1, 2017)

SunCMars said:


> Uh, no!
> 
> He has to go!


Let's not lose our heads. Just because he choose to act poorly to Ks lack of support doesn't necessarily mean the gallows. I'm pretty sure Ks stated faith has something in there about forgiveness should she deem and he prove himself worthy

Sent from my SM-G935V using Tapatalk


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## Livvie (Jan 20, 2014)

It's possible he took the pictures to share with the woman from work. Then, made up the story about sharing them "online" instead of telling you the truth.

I'd ask him to show you where he shared them online. If he can't show you right away, then it's probably a made up story.


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

GatorXP said:


> Let's not lose our heads. Just because he choose to act poorly to Ks lack of support doesn't necessarily mean the gallows. I'm pretty sure Ks stated faith has something in there about forgiveness should she deem and he prove himself worthy
> 
> Sent from my SM-G935V using Tapatalk


OK.. 

Gator, neither male nor female.

Being a ghost and a ghost of a gentleman, I am not [able or willing] to flip a Florida Gator over and determine your gender.

Let us see how this plays...out.

You have ten posts to date..
You are new here....

That is fine, as HERE is still THERE...where we all muddle and cuddle in muddy bayous; of our own making.

Later...Gator!


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti (Apr 23, 2017)

I can't solve your problem but I can help you frame it.

All men do not do this. Please do not chalk this up to being a "man thing."

This most definitely is a form of cheating even if no physical contact ever took place. In the absence of a fully negotiated agreement to the contrary, any intimate image is for your spouse only.

Only with a rock solid understanding and internalizing of that fact will you be able determine and enforce reasonable expectations and boundaries moving forward and make the right decisions accordingly.


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## Lila (May 30, 2014)

ktheuerkauf said:


> My husband and I are trying to rebuild our marriage. We've drifted apart for several reasons and are trying to reconnect. A few months ago, I discovered that my husband was hanging out with a woman (half his age) from his volunteer job on a regular basis and did not tell me. I found out that their relationship was on the flirtatious side. He ended it with her, even though he said that it was nothing and he was seeking support from other people because I was not providing it. I own up that and am trying to be more supportive and am working hard on being a better person and wife. Flash forward to now. I was charging my phone on our computer and found naked pictures of him, including pictures of his penis. I asked him about this and he said he felt unattractive to me, so he shared his pictures online to see whether or not he was attractive. To be honest, it's sickening to me. Though I'm not a prude, I have a moral code and think he crossed the line. I understand why he did it and that informs me that I need to make him feel more desirable, but I still think it's inappropriate. After his relationship with the woman and now this, I'm questioning the kind of person he is. We're Christians and he won't go to church with me or talk about God with me anymore. Maybe I'm overreacting and guys do this all the time. I only have sisters and only had a few guy friends growing up, so I'm unsure of the guy world. Any thoughts or advice would be helpful.


So what has your husband done to win back your trust after his little "flirting fling"? What has he done since you found the photos? Did he seek out individual counseling to understand his incessant need for external validation? Did he show true remorse for lying to you? 

Sounds to me like he's done an excellent job of blaming you for his "peccadilloes".


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

@Lila


> Sounds to me like he's done an excellent job of blaming you for his "peccadilloes".




Yep..

For pick a dildo, pack of dildo pictures.

If you can turn this around "K", I would commend you.

At the same time, condemn him. 

This is just so.....juvenile. 

He is a grown man, another Carlos Danger [Anthony Wiener] in the flesh. If you were to mention either one of those names in his presence...would he know them?


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*Don't let yourself be fooled! Those "weenus" pictures of his were taken strictly for "her" benefit and enjoyment! And not yours!

Someone is trying to pull "the wool" down over your eyes!*


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## Not (Jun 12, 2017)

If it's attention he needs he's way to needy. Sounds like it would be a full time job feeding that ego.


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## Windwalker (Mar 19, 2014)

SunCMars said:


> OK..
> 
> Gator, neither male nor female.
> 
> ...


You are hilarious and puzzling.
A true quandary of the mind.
Dont ever change.
:grin2:

Sorry for the tread jack.


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