# Why Penile Implants Are the New Boob Job



## Truthseeker1 (Jul 17, 2013)

*The wonders of modern medicine...would you get one?*


Why Penile Implants Are the New Boob Job

A woman tells you what it’s like to sleep with a man who has a medically enhanced erection


By Anka Radakovich Monday, September 21, 2015, 9:51 pm 

I recently met a guy with a sexual secret.

He was 39, in great shape, and in his spare time was a CrossFit athlete. But he had diabetes, and he told me that it made him impotent.

After a few years of taking Viagra and Cialis, the pills just didn’t work for him anymore. So he got a penile implant; the female equivalent of a boob job—a “boner job,” if you will.

He was so cute and funny, I didn’t really care. Besides, an erect, on-demand, rock hard schlong that could go for hours? I was in.

And now that women are getting vaginal rejuvenation to tighten their baby makers, it seemed silly to be afraid of the latest improvements in medical technology.

The implant consists of two plastic rods that go into the penis and an attached reservoir filled with saline solution is placed in the lower stomach. Then a pump with a valve is implanted in their scrotum. (Read our full report on How Penile Implants Work.)

I’d seen a penile implant before, at a nudist resort. A guy in his 70s—who called his “The Pump”—played volleyball erect, chatted erect, and even dined erect.

But seeing it is one thing. For something more intimate, like actual sex, would I be able to tell the difference between a regular raging boner and a medically enhanced one?

“Some single or divorced men who are in new relationships don’t even tell their partners they have the implant, and their partners never find out,” says Dr. William Brant, M.D. a urologist and advisor to ED Cure | Erectile Dysfunction Treatment | Causes of ED, who specializes in the procedure.

After a few dates, I was curious to road test this innovative inflatable device. I admit I was nervous when he came over. And when it came to actual intercourse, I got scared for a second.

There are four levels of hardness: limp, half-chub, hard, and “OMG you’re going to kill me with that thing.” I feared it would feel like I was fornicating with a baseball bat.

We made out for a while, and then he grabbed his manhood and did about 20 or so “squeeze pumps,” taking his thumb and forefinger and squeezing a grape-like bulb underneath his junk.

I watched it inflate in a few seconds, like one of those balloon animals at a carnival.

And the results? It felt like a normal stiffee in my hand, and I didn’t feel the pump or valve when I road tested it in my mouth.

It was rock hard, like it should be, but I didn’t feel like I was sucking a tail pipe or anything. And by the time we actually did the deed, I forget all about the implant and enjoyed myself.

After he finished, the thing was still standing at attention. Since there is no refractory period, his bazooka was ready to go. It was bionic.

“Dude, you should go over to CrossFit and see if anyone wants to use that thing as a pull-up bar,” I told him.


To deflate, a quick pump or two of a valve—located next to the pumper upper—released the saline solution back into the reservoir and it went back down.

In the end, our summer romance ended, and my “Penile Implant Guy” moved out of New York. But someday we will meet again. We might be 80 by then, but he’ll have the boner of an 18-year-old.


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## Cletus (Apr 27, 2012)

Truthseeker1 said:


> *The wonders of modern medicine...would you get one?*


Well, you know what they say, Truth, when you get an implant:

"Then we will inflate our boners in the shade!"


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## Mr. Nail (Apr 26, 2011)

Thanks, I've been contemplating this surgery, for the same reason. A female review is helpful.


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

If I ever need the extra boost and my wife is still good to go years down the road from now, then sure, I'd get one. I'll specify a closed casket - just in case.


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## Cletus (Apr 27, 2012)

Married but Happy said:


> If I ever need the extra boost and my wife is still good to go years down the road from now, then sure, I'd get one. I'll specify a closed casket - just in case.


Fly that flag proud, son. Just make sure the mortician paints a smile on your face.


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## Dude007 (Jun 22, 2015)

I always keep a Popsicle stick and duck tape handy. Dude
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Nucking Futs (Apr 8, 2013)

Cletus said:


> Well, you know what they say, Truth, when you get an implant:
> 
> "Then we will inflate our boners in the shade!"


Wait, are there arrows in this story?


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

Interesting.

It'd be more interesting (to me, anyway) to read it from the guy's perspective, though.


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## CH (May 18, 2010)

Hopefully I never have to go this route. Just the wind passing between my legs will get it up sometimes....:grin2:

But as others have stated, good to know just in case.


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## Cletus (Apr 27, 2012)

Once I get one of these, plus T shots, Androgel, and god knows what else, I'll just don a Darth Vader mask before climbing into bed. That should make the choke play a whole lot easier. 

"He's more machine now than man."


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## CH (May 18, 2010)

Cletus said:


> Once I get one of these, plus T shots, Androgel, and god knows what else, I'll just don a Darth Vader mask before climbing into bed. That should make the choke play a whole lot easier.
> 
> "He's more machine now than man."


You should probably find if they have some red glow in the dark ink that is safe to use on skin :wink2:


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

CH said:


> You should probably find if they have some red glow in the dark ink that is safe to use on skin :wink2:


I got the implant with color changing LED lights embedded into the shaft. I was out on a hot date and when the moment came, she screamed and ran for the hills thinking I had a rare std or something.

Here is what a normal implant looks like:










but I UPGRADED for this one!!!










wish I had not and now my insurance will not pay to have it replaced with a normal one.

Badsanta


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## Amplexor (Feb 13, 2008)

badsanta said:


> I got the implant with color changing LED lights embedded into the shaft. I was out on a hot date and when the moment came, she screamed and ran for the hills thinking I had a rare std or something.
> adsanta


Badsanta knocking some off on the living room floor!


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

So, now you're a *flasher*, badsanta?

I think a version with built-in, variable speed *vibrator* would be more appealing to the ladies. What do you think?


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Amplexor said:


> Badsanta knocking some off on the living room floor!


:rofl:

Hahaha LOL damn... stomach pain lol

Anyway on topic: OH HELL NO!!!


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## john117 (May 20, 2013)

Too low tech - needs Bluetooth 4.x and an app to customize boner-ness and lighting patterns... 

In-app purchases too.


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

I probably wouldn't but if my towel rack, her name for it, ever failed, you never know. So far I have been a walking hard on since age ten.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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