# So When a Woman Sees a "Hot Guy"...



## MountainRunner (Dec 30, 2014)

..what goes through her mind? I'm curious because on another bodybuilding forum, a pic was put up of a built fitness model and all the women were literally throwing their "ePanties" at his pic. Many of whom are married. So it got me thinking and I even asked a female friend about it. She is of the opinion that women may think a guy is hot, but the next thing that goes through their mind isn't necessarily that they'd like to bed him. they may get all "riled up", but they'll go home to their mate and bang him. I found that a bit odd that a woman gets "wet" by another man and will go home and do her man after another man got her motor running. Why was she all horny if she wasn't sexually "interested" in said hot guy?

When you gals see a hot guy, what goes through your mind? Do you think "Oh...that's nice." and move on? Do you think "Damn...What I wouldn't do to get my hands on that!"

The reason I'm asking is because I believe that my own thoughts about women in general has been biased by my direct experience with women over the years.


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## TiggyBlue (Jul 29, 2012)

Me personally it's "Damn, what I wouldn't do to that" show the closest female near the hot guy and move on.


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## sapientia (Nov 24, 2012)

Women spend 1/2 as much time staring at guys.. but when we do, its your eyes that fascinate:

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/new...970007/Men-spend-a-year-staring-at-women.html


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## MountainRunner (Dec 30, 2014)

sapientia said:


> Women spend 1/2 as much time staring at guys.. but when we do, its your eyes that fascinate:
> 
> Men spend a year staring at women - Telegraph


That article is funny because the last time a woman "exuberantly" told me that she "appreciated" me...I was out at the local shopping mall getting groceries and a scanner for my wife. I do the bulk of grocery shopping and I would agree that women use the supermarket to get their fill of eye candy.


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## Holland (Aug 20, 2012)

I very much enjoy perving on hot guys, yes it makes me think of sex but TBH I have the best lover I have ever had so he gets the benefit of the heightened sexual urges. He has no problem with that, he trusts me and is a very happy man.

Actually a guy does not have to have a hot body for me to have a second look, I love good looking men, men in suits, men on bicycles, men with great smiles. My heart only belongs to one though.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

MountainRunner said:


> I found that a bit odd that a woman gets "wet" by another man and will go home and do her man after another man got her motor running. Why was she all horny if she wasn't sexually "interested" in said hot guy?


Isn't this the same thing that men do when they see a hot woman? They are not usually going to have sex with every hot woman they see.. but it does get them sexually 'interested'.


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## Omego (Apr 17, 2013)

I usually think: 'What an attractive guy!' And that's it. No sexual urges. However, if I wasn't fulfilled in my marriage, I'm sure things would be quite different.


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## NextTimeAround (Dec 15, 2011)

My husband indulges me in my celebrity crushes, Liam Nissan and Dr. Nassif on Botched.

I would never mention to him about hot guy in real life.

To get a man's position, I will ask him his opinion about celebrity women. But I know not to ask about women in real life.

When I was younger and single, I might have tried to approach the guy. I wish I had learned sooner that men prefer to do the approaching.

But I'm happily married now, so I can help the next generation.


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## SecondTime'Round (Jan 15, 2015)

I do not think about jumping into bed with him. I think about getting to know him, wonder what he's like. Also, I'll send my single female friend a text about it, something along the lines of, "Damn, I'm hanging out at the Toyota dealership lounge more often! And next time I'm not wearing a hoodie and sweats!" (I may or may not have sent that text earlier this week  )


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## bfree (Sep 30, 2012)

*Re: So When a Woman Sees a &quot;Hot Guy&quot;...*



EleGirl said:


> Isn't this the same thing that men do when they see a hot woman? They are not usually going to have sex with every hot woman they see.. but it does get them sexually 'interested'.


No, if men are being honest the first thought is of the sex act itself. If they're being honest. Well maybe "thought" isn't the right word. Mental image is more accurate.Then they think things like "I'm already with _____" or "she wouldn't be interested" or she must have a boyfriend/husband" etc. Most men are very risk averse and loathe rejection. The ones that aren't do think they're going to have sex with every hot woman they see. Their first thought is "yeah, she's mine."


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## soulpotato (Jan 22, 2013)

I don't think that kind of behavior (or response) is appropriate. People seem to think it's fine to just "lust and not touch", but I don't and I wouldn't want my mate doing it either.


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## lucy999 (Sep 28, 2014)

MountainRunner said:


> When you gals see a hot guy, what goes through your mind? Do you think "Oh...that's nice." and move on? Do you think "Damn...What I wouldn't do to get my hands on that!"


Warning: this is really shallow!

I'll admit I perv out and think about what we'd both do to each other in bed. The best sex I've ever had was with a bodybuilder and it kind of set the template. :| I realize this is a huge shortcoming of mine.

That said (I warned you this was shallow!) if he doesn't have the best face, but a rockin body, I'll admire his body from a nonsexual standpoint, if that makes sense. I love to look at very fit bodies, male or female. I'm always so impressed by their dedication to that lifestyle.


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## stephscarlett (Sep 2, 2015)

there is no way I can be attracted to a man without knowing him personally so I think - I wonder how he got those abs and would the same workout/nutrition work for me? In addition, guys who are really good looking or body builders look like high maintenance to me. Not interested.


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## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

Just because I am on a diet, it does not mean I cannot look at the cake. I like looking at cakes, but not tempted to eat.


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## ihatethis (Oct 17, 2013)

I look at them and think "ooh he is good looking" but I immediately think "I wonder what his personality is like" because honestly, you can be a 10 in the looks department but if you open your mouth and you have no personality or think you are God's gift to women, I'm out. There of course has to be an attraction but it'st he personality that really gets me excited.


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## kristin2349 (Sep 12, 2013)

ihatethis said:


> I look at them and think "ooh he is good looking" but I immediately think "I wonder what his personality is like" because honestly, you can be a 10 in the looks department but if you open your mouth and you have no personality or think you are God's gift to women, I'm out. There of course has to be an attraction but it'st he personality that really gets me excited.



I agree with this^ Normally it wouldn't even progress to wondering about their personality because I was married. Now that I am single I pay a little more attention but not to then extent of "putting them into the spank bank" or anything. I can eye up man candy in a pretty detached way and just appreciate that they are good looking. Cars, jewelry and handbags can literally make me feel more wanton lust than a stranger who happens to be hot.


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## SecondTime'Round (Jan 15, 2015)

kristin2349 said:


> I agree with this^ Normally it wouldn't even progress to wondering about their personality because I was married. Now that I am single I pay a little more attention but not to then extent of "putting them into the spank bank" or anything. I can eye up man candy in a pretty detached way and just appreciate that they are good looking. *Cars, jewelry and handbags can literally make me feel more wanton lust than a stranger who happens to be hot.*


:rofl:


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

*Re: So When a Woman Sees a &quot;Hot Guy&quot;...*



bfree said:


> No, if men are being honest the first thought is of the sex act itself. If they're being honest. Well maybe "thought" isn't the right word. Mental image is more accurate.Then they think things like "I'm already with _____" or "she wouldn't be interested" or she must have a boyfriend/husband" etc. Most men are very risk averse and loathe rejection. The ones that aren't do think they're going to have sex with every hot woman they see. Their first thought is "yeah, she's mine."


This is my husband's thoughts... had a conversation over this thread yrs ago .. http://talkaboutmarriage.com/mens-clubhouse/24519-way-men-really-think.html .......We both understand the allure of noticing the the opposite sex, what erotic rise there could be in a moment... we're very open with each other like this, it's free flowing.. neither of us would Gawk.. or linger ...so it's never been a problem for us.. .

This is how he explained it ...

1st he looks at the face, this will not sound nice but he says "if she is dog faced, no sense in going any further", then he automatically puts them into baskets >>> "Doable" ..."Maybe".... or "ewwww NEVER". He said IF there is a CHOICE in these matters, it would be to LOOK AWAY immediately, but he admitted he doesn't want to do that... "it is no fun".... Then here is his next mental thoughts within seconds..... *"I love my wife, STD's, I love my kids , STD's" *...and that is the end of the fleeting fantasy.

*Me*.. I am actually very similar to my husband.. in the thought process...

I have always felt the hotter the Guy (though sometimes I check out some odd ones too- where this may not be the case at all).. but immediately my brain will speak how he's probably banged 100 women, black book a mile long, women falling all over him... and frankly this part of it is a terrible turn off to me..

I do care more about a man over just his body & sexual appeal.... But those lust centers of the brain can give a rise of something very pleasurable in a moment...stopping us in our tracks.. for a glimpse... like " Oh my my my... "....a little heart race.. maybe even a tickle shooting down my spine".... 

But still I remind myself.. I have ALL I need right here, if my husband is close by.. I will grab him, maybe even squeeze his butt or something, tell him how I can't wait to get him alone later.. really.. no one could ever take his place.







It's just a fleeting fantasy...that means nothing.


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## EnigmaGirl (Feb 7, 2015)

I honestly can say I'm not attracted to men who preen in front of camera's or mirrors. I'm extremely turned off by superficiality though.

I love modest men who really have no clue how good looking they are. Plus, I love older men...always have.

The other thing I think is "He might be more of a catch if he'd put his shirt back on and got a real job."

The most attractive man I've ever seen or known is my husband. He's insanely modest, brilliant and financially stable.


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## norajane (Feb 7, 2012)

MountainRunner said:


> ..what goes through her mind? I'm curious because on another bodybuilding forum, a pic was put up of a built fitness model and all the women were literally throwing their "ePanties" at his pic. Many of whom are married.


That site is geared toward people who focus on body. epanties (?!) are a social convention of that site. That's not representative the of the whole of woman-kind.

I think, "cute guy!" and move on. But I'm not doing that based on body. I like faces instead.


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## Nynaeve (Jun 19, 2013)

norajane said:


> That site is geared toward people who focus on body. epanties (?!) are a social convention of that site. That's not representative the of the whole of woman-kind.
> 
> I think, "cute guy!" and move on. But I'm not doing that based on body. I like faces instead.


This goes for me, exactly. I honestly don't get past "he's cute.". When I was single, I'd glance at his left hand to check for a ring. And then maybe I'd entertain a quick fantasy of striking up a conversation with him. But, besides celebrities, I've honestly never had sexual thoughts or feelings about a man I've not spoken to. I have to have some sort of mental/emotional connection with a person to get turned on.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## MountainRunner (Dec 30, 2014)

norajane said:


> That site is geared toward people who focus on body. epanties (?!) are a social convention of that site. * That's not representative the of the whole of woman-kind*.


True, but I have witnessed similar responses when I was active on FB and a woman would put up a pic of Channing Tatum or some other male model and the replies from the women was....heh..."enthusiastic" shall we say?

Anyway, interesting responses to say the least and I want to thank all who offered up their thoughts. I'm beginning to believe that my own thoughts/feelings about how women behave in male/female situations has been severely skewed based upon my own experiences.

I'm going to be honest and risk getting flamed, but based upon my own experiences and observations, if a woman sees a hot guy and begins drooling over him...she wants to have, or at the very least would like to, have sex with him.

I'm beginning to draw this conclusion and I know that it is unhealthy. It will be something I will be discussing in therapy.


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## MountainRunner (Dec 30, 2014)

Nynaeve said:


> ...But, besides celebrities, I've honestly never had sexual thoughts or feelings about a man I've not spoken to.


Interesting...So are you saying that you have had sexual thoughts/feelings toward a male celebrity but not an "unknown" piece of beefcake posted on some page?


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## kristin2349 (Sep 12, 2013)

MountainRunner said:


> Interesting...So are you saying that you have had sexual thoughts/feelings toward a male celebrity but not an "unknown" piece of beefcake posted on some page?



Most people have some preconceived notion of a celebrities personality. It may be completely manufactured but it adds to the overall appeal over some straight up beefcake photo.


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## SecondTime'Round (Jan 15, 2015)

MountainRunner said:


> True, but I have witnessed similar responses when I was active on FB and a woman would put up a pic of Channing Tatum or some other male model and the replies from the women was....heh..."enthusiastic" shall we say?


I don't think you can really go by that. Those women are feeding off each other.


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## tech-novelist (May 15, 2014)

SecondTime'Round said:


> I don't think you can really go by that. Those women are feeding off each other.


BTW, that is a well-known effect called "pre-selection".


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## sixty-eight (Oct 2, 2015)

soulpotato said:


> I don't think that kind of behavior (or response) is appropriate. People seem to think it's fine to just "lust and not touch", but I don't and I wouldn't want my mate doing it either.


i agree with this, partially. it's not appropriate to be eyeing up every guy and thinking about being in bed with them if you are married. however, there is nothing wrong with appreciating beauty. When i see a man with a nice set of eyes, or a body that looks like he has spent time working on, i have no problem looking at them, thinking that they're beautiful. Similar to my reaction to seeing a beautiful pair of shoes, or a lovely flower, or a painting. letting it progress to lust is a bad habit.

however, involuntary reactions are not something i let myself feel guilty over. If i saw someone hot, that i wanted (eg: a celebrity or the local Starbucks barista. whoever.) are the feelings wrong? no. acting on the feelings would be wrong, or dwelling on them all the time. But is it wrong to watch a movie or read a book that turns you on, and then want to have sex with your husband after? imo, only if you were imagining someone else instead of husband.



kristin2349 said:


> Normally it wouldn't even progress to wondering about their personality because I was married. Now that I am single I pay a little more attention but not to then extent of "putting them into the spank bank" or anything. *I can eye up man candy in a pretty detached way and just appreciate that they are good looking.* Cars, jewelry and handbags can literally make me feel more wanton lust than a stranger who happens to be hot.


^well said


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## Nynaeve (Jun 19, 2013)

MountainRunner said:


> Interesting...So are you saying that you have had sexual thoughts/feelings toward a male celebrity but not an "unknown" piece of beefcake posted on some page?


Yep. Sexual thoughts about actors, mostly. And usually about the characters they played rather than the actor. My fantasies pretty much always involved elaborate back stories. I probably should be a romance novelist. 

Without some context, pretty faces and bodies are like artwork. I can appreciate the aesthetic and knowing how much effort they put into making their body look that way but drooling is not in it.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Lila (May 30, 2014)

Seeing still photos of a gorgeous man or a good looking man that's just standing still really does nothing for me. A man in motion is a whole other story. Something about the way a man moves that sets my mind off. Some guys can be beautiful and have no idea how to move their bodies in general. Some guys can be kind of average looking but immediately capture my attention (and imagination) with their movement. To make things more complicated, what works for one guy doesn't necessarily work for another. 

For example, I saw Magic Mike 2 not long ago on a GNO. I'm going to preface this eg. by admitting that I've been to several male revues before and never really understood what the hullabaloo was all about. The other girls at the GNO were all giddy to see Channing Tatum. I agree, he's a beautiful piece of human artwork, however I always considered him another pretty Hollywood face........until he started moving. My jaw dropped. Had Channing Tatum been doing his dance for ME, I'd be all over him like white on rice. 

Another example is my husband. I think he's a good looking guy but like all other men, I appreciate his physical attributes as artwork. I'll be honest and admit that I don't get turned on by just looking at him standing. He has to do something sexual (kiss me, touch me, tell me a dirty joke...something) to turn me on....except when he works out. His perfect and smooth movements, combined with rippling muscles are an aphrodisiac. He can flex for me at home and it won't do a thing for me. It's his movements that turn me on.

So I guess the moral of the story is what works for one, doesn't necessarily work for all. Clear as mud?


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## ticktock33 (Jun 6, 2014)

In the past I never really noticed a hot or handsome looking guy, I'm married so I've got tunnel vision. But in the last few years my husband and I have had real issues with him talking and looking at women in a obvious way. Now it's more of a 2 can play that game and the goggles are off.

That being said, if I see a guy that is handsome I might think about it a little more but not in a sexual way. I'm very visual so I appreciate a good looking guy but it's never sexual.More like an innocent crush and I don't feel guilty about it anymore. I stare Jemaine Clement a little more than I should now. We even joked about it, he and Rihanna will be very happy together while I run off to marry Jemaine.


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