# I’m only attracted to men with personality disorders



## Xylophone1286 (Oct 9, 2021)

Evening! Was following another thread, but the moderator closed it so I’m posting here anew.
I was dating a man who told me to read a book on Charles Sobhraj, because he said he’s exactly like him except he doesn’t kill people. I guess he was trying to tell me he’s a psychopath? I’m disturbed bc if I’m honest, I can see him that way, yet I’m deeply drawn to him. I spend most of my time miserable bc I want to be treated
better/commitment, but I get such a high from any interaction with him even though theyre Emotionally never fulfilling. Examples…
1) he likes to remind me that he abandons Everyone and likes to be able to leave any situation without Warning . Like how a company tailor made a position for him and Bent over to his demands then he left within a year, for no real reason (though rumor had it he was kinda forced out for being reckless). and he says he never Should’ve even been there Bc why didnt he stay in his home state w his kids and wife?! Says he doesn’t care. Even if people are very upset with him it means nothing

2) I could tell him I’m upset over something serious at work and he’ll blankly stare, never comfort. Empathic Phrases like “I’m sorry” or “that must be so hard“ literally don’t exist. If I’m talking about a recent hike he might interrupt me right as I’m describing the summit to start hooking up. he’ll never stay the night. if I put my arm around him he‘ll shove it away. sex is as cold as can be

3) If you say something like “since you’ve been out of town on business all month, now that you’re finally around this weekend I thought we’d spend it together,” he loses it and says not to expect anything of him and as soon as hd feels any demands he will punch his way out of the proverbial box to be free. Obsessed w being free and not attached to anyone yet if I were to see other guys I’m a terrible woman and how dare I.

now anyone would say he is toxic and I should get away. Obvi. so why am I so attracted and obsessed, and around more normal guys I feel panicked like I’ll get bored and went to leave? If I can’t cure this guess what, I’m going to end up old and alone chasing a Personality disordered guy… but I cannot force myself to want someone more normal! i was married to a guy who on the surface was fine (actually emotionally empty\lots of problems but I digress), and I couldn’t stoMach the thought of the rest of my life without passion. But this psychopath is my idea,of passion?!!!! I feel so close when he’s telling me terrible things about himself


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## TXTrini (Oct 2, 2013)

Why do you keep posting the same story under different names?


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

This is beyond the kind of help that this board can give you.

Whatever you do leave the "boring" guys alone. Don't pick one because you decide you want someone stable for a while. You will end up destroying his life like these guys you pick destroy the women they are with. 

No offense but you are pretty much the female version of those guys


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## Laurentium (May 21, 2017)

Psychopathy and personality disorder are two pretty different things. 



Xylophone1286 said:


> so why am I so attracted and obsessed, and around more normal guys I feel panicked like I’ll get bored and went to leave?


You need a therapist to answer that.


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

Xylophone1286 said:


> Evening! Was following another thread, but the moderator closed it so I’m posting here anew.
> I was dating a man who told me to read a book on Charles Sobhraj, because he said he’s exactly like him except he doesn’t kill people. I guess he was trying to tell me he’s a psychopath? I’m disturbed bc if I’m honest, I can see him that way, yet I’m deeply drawn to him. I spend most of my time miserable bc I want to be treated
> better/commitment, but I get such a high from any interaction with him even though theyre Emotionally never fulfilling. Examples…
> 1) he likes to remind me that he abandons Everyone and likes to be able to leave any situation without Warning . Like how a company tailor made a position for him and Bent over to his demands then he left within a year, for no real reason (though rumor had it he was kinda forced out for being reckless). and he says he never Should’ve even been there Bc why didnt he stay in his home state w his kids and wife?! Says he doesn’t care. Even if people are very upset with him it means nothing
> ...


I don't know why you are accepting this behavior, but I'd be getting myself down to the psychologist to find out. And meanwhile you'd be better off not dating.


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## Blondilocks (Jul 4, 2013)

DownByTheRiver said:


> *I don't know why you are accepting this behavior, *but I'd be getting myself down to the psychologist to find out. And meanwhile you'd be better off not dating.


She doesn't know either. Ask one of her other banned personalities.


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

Blondilocks said:


> She doesn't know either. Ask one of her other banned personalities.


So it's probably a guy posing as a woman to make it look like no women like nice guys.


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## OnTheFly (Mar 12, 2015)

DownByTheRiver said:


> So it's probably a guy posing as a woman to make it look like no women like nice guys.


Or it’s a woman being brutally honest about the mate selecting process of a fair number of women. 

Her story isn’t surprising or uncommon.


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

OnTheFly said:


> Or it’s a woman being brutally honest about the mate selecting process of a fair number of women.
> 
> Her story isn’t surprising or uncommon.


Please.


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## OnTheFly (Mar 12, 2015)

DownByTheRiver said:


> Please.


Was it the usage of “fair” number of women that is a problem?

Because it’s not like there aren’t a fair number of women who are pen pals with the most psychotic murderers in jail professing their undying love....is there?

The only possible answer is a guy trolling as a female to make women look bad???

Maybe all those pen pals are dudes too....logical thinking.


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

OnTheFly said:


> Was it the usage of “fair” number of women that is a problem?
> 
> Because it’s not like there aren’t a fair number of women who are pen pals with the most psychotic murderers in jail professing their undying love....is there?
> 
> ...


I don't call the small amount of women writing letters to prison or a fair amount of women or any representation of women whatsoever.


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## OnTheFly (Mar 12, 2015)

DownByTheRiver said:


> I don't call the small amount of women writing letters to prison or a fair amount of women or any representation of women whatsoever.


Fine, to you they don’t exist, or aren’t important enough to consider. Others do care. Because if it was my sister making these incredibly stupid mate selection choices, she’d damn sure hear about it. 

To the OP, if this is what you want in life there will be dire consequences. It’s sad no one in your immediate family and friends haven’t (metaphorically) slapped you upside the head.

You know it’ll be a problem, so stop it.....or at least don’t bring an innocent child into your warped life if the tingles for danger are too powerful to resist.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

The OP was banned. This thread is now closed.


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