# New and looking for advice/support



## lovemygirl (May 16, 2013)

I'm new here so forgive me if I don't get this right! I am going through a divorce after almost 10yrs of marriage. To make a long story short, there were at least 5 1/2 yrs of an affair (husband) and maybe longer. He is currently with his paramour. I am in fact ok with it as I got over him 2 years ago or so and never had the strength to leave. We have 1 child,age 5. Of course walking out the door caused him to go crazy, he wanted us to stay. The divorce proceedings have gotten increasingly nasty and I have court coming up on Monday and am a nervous wreck. I have primary custody and he has EOW and 1 night a week until 7. I offered him joint when I left and he refused. He has since not paid the correct amount of spousal support or child support which forced me into bankruptcy. Our original orders were never signed becuase the judge got ill and then retired, hence, why we go back Monday. Ex currently resides in the martial home because on top of having to get a restraining order in the winter, he was recently in the home in the middle of the night while our child and I sleeping. OK the reason I am a little concerned is that in October 2012, long after I walked out the door I met someone. This has driven my Ex crazy and he has some pictures of significant others car and other things in front of martial home when child and I lived ther and now maybe a few from where we live now. Will these hold any weight?


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## Voltaire (Feb 5, 2013)

I doubt they will bear any weight (a car in front of a house - what does that prove?) but you should check with a lawyer. Obviously it depends on what jurisdiction you are in. The obvious line for him to argue is that your relationship with OM shows a clear intent for you to cohabit, and that he should therefore pay less in maintenance.

Have you introduced your child to this man?


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## lovemygirl (May 16, 2013)

We do occasionally meet at the park with his child but never alone. Always with family and has never been introduced as my significant other. Never any overnights when I have our child. Lawyer says who cares but shes not a judge!! We are in VA.


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