# Separated 6 months



## TheOne6 (Jun 16, 2017)

Hello Everyone,

I'll get straight to the point. I'm 35 wife is 34, married 8 years together 10. 2 kids 9 and 7. Before I went on deployment of April last year, my wife found me texting another female. It was strictly text and nothing else. My wife had become distant from me and was focused on school and other things. I apologized, cut off the texting. I deployed a few weeks later. While I was gone, she started hanging out with another married man from her LPN class. They hung out, drank together ect. She hid all of this from me. Before I came home from my 9 month deployment, she was being distant, not really talking to me and said she wanted to separate. So I came home and found out from my kids this guy was around a lot. She claims he was just a friend, that he was married but then why is he around my wife. My wife is black and he is an Asian guy and she never seemed attracted to them (I'm white). We been separated 6 months and this past month I finally was invite over after not really talking and arguing about everything. I spent the night over there Atleast 6 times and I done sexual things to her but she still won't have full out sex with me. She seems confused about what she wants. She said "Even if we get back together, I still want to hang out with my friends". It was never like that for 10 years! It was all about us and our family. She said while I was gone she found her identity again and she didn't want to be just a wife and mother. So I'm really confused as to what i should do. I like spending time with her but she doesn't seem 100% invested yet.


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## BobSimmons (Mar 2, 2013)

Why not invite your wife's boyfriend to hang out? It will stop the "confusion"


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## honcho (Oct 5, 2013)

TheOne6 said:


> Hello Everyone,
> 
> I'll get straight to the point. I'm 35 wife is 34, married 8 years together 10. 2 kids 9 and 7. Before I went on deployment of April last year, my wife found me texting another female. It was strictly text and nothing else. My wife had become distant from me and was focused on school and other things. I apologized, cut off the texting. I deployed a few weeks later. While I was gone, she started hanging out with another married man from her LPN class. They hung out, drank together ect. She hid all of this from me. Before I came home from my 9 month deployment, she was being distant, not really talking to me and said she wanted to separate. So I came home and found out from my kids this guy was around a lot. She claims he was just a friend, that he was married but then why is he around my wife. My wife is black and he is an Asian guy and she never seemed attracted to them (I'm white). We been separated 6 months and this past month I finally was invite over after not really talking and arguing about everything. I spent the night over there Atleast 6 times and I done sexual things to her but she still won't have full out sex with me. She seems confused about what she wants. She said "Even if we get back together, I still want to hang out with my friends". It was never like that for 10 years! It was all about us and our family. She said while I was gone she found her identity again and she didn't want to be just a wife and mother. So I'm really confused as to what i should do. I like spending time with her but she doesn't seem 100% invested yet.


She isn't confused, she is playing you right now. She isn't invested at all in the marriage, your plan b. You should consult a lawyer and file for divorce. Your trying to nice her back when in fact your just allowing her affair to continue. If om is married find out who his spouse is and expose the affair.


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