# How can I regain trust in my kids mother?



## Parkerbo (Oct 2, 2017)

After what seems like years of her being unreliable I find myself wanted to help my kids and her have a relationship. The thing is over the years she has habitually driven drunk with the kids, left them alone at night to go drink, ignored them at home, disappeared at night only to return after ruining family plans, and finally abandoning them at home for me to find. To follow that up for months she hasn't wanted to be involved at all despite that her being gone put my job in serious jeapordy, ruined our finances basically making us poor, and caused me to ship them off to my mom's until school started just so I could keep working and put food on the table. It was sudden and the only way I could handle it. In my mind my kids lost their mom, and then me. I now have sole physical and legal custody and she can't so much as call the school for an update. If she wants to come back howndo I do this? I feel like I know what she did while we were together, I sure don't want to know what she'll do if I'm not watching. Other than her eventually coming home and committing to the family, and I can kind of keep an eye on things, I have no ideas. Open to suggestions.


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## Satya (Jun 22, 2012)

When she has such a history of treating them terribly, acting irresponsibly, and with indifference, why are you even entertaining this idea?


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## Laurentium (May 21, 2017)

I'd want to see maybe 5 or 7 years of sobriety, working the programme.

How old are the children?


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

From bar to bar.
From man to man.

From bottle to bottle.
From man to man.

From home to home.
From man to man.

Her gut filled with liquor.
Her men filled with lick-her.

Her man is in the bottle.
She keeps tipping it up, hoping he will fall out and into her mind.

Your wife ended up inside that bottle, it sucked her in.
The alcohol dissolved her resolve.
Dissolved her essence. Her worth.

Her skin will get wrinkly and paunch.
Her bottom and thighs soft from all the bar stools sat.
And all the beds laid flat. On her back.

What you had is gone.
What you had is now a memory, a mirage.
She is gone, melted away in a icy glass. A cherry next to her heart. 
It's stem is still attached. Waiting for the next man to pluck it.
Take it and her heart.... to her next home, next bed.


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

Have you ever listened to an alcoholic women sing?
Have you ever heard her speak?

All those days and nights consuming hard liquor.
All those OH groups flowing over her vocal chords.

Burning and converting.
From the sweet sound of a Warbler to the Caw of a Crow.

Turning a beautiful women.
Into a shrew and a fish women.

From One so beautiful and groomed.
Into a hairy and smelly off-key trumpet.

They sit on their stools and cackle and howl.
Waiting for the next drink to appear.
Waiting for the next man to milk. His dollars for her body and soul.


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## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

Parkerbo said:


> After what seems like years of her being unreliable I find myself wanted to help my kids and her have a relationship. The thing is over the years she has habitually driven drunk with the kids, left them alone at night to go drink, ignored them at home, disappeared at night only to return after ruining family plans, and finally abandoning them at home for me to find. To follow that up for months she hasn't wanted to be involved at all despite that her being gone put my job in serious jeapordy, ruined our finances basically making us poor, and caused me to ship them off to my mom's until school started just so I could keep working and put food on the table. It was sudden and the only way I could handle it. In my mind my kids lost their mom, and then me. I now have sole physical and legal custody and she can't so much as call the school for an update. If she wants to come back howndo I do this? I feel like I know what she did while we were together, I sure don't want to know what she'll do if I'm not watching. Other than her eventually coming home and committing to the family, and I can kind of keep an eye on things, I have no ideas. Open to suggestions.


Honestly, I think it might be less painful for your kids for her not to be in their lives. If they choose to make have a relationship when they are adults that is up to them and her.


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## Lostinthought61 (Nov 5, 2013)

How old are the children, are they old enough to understand the situation and her issues?


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