# How do i leave and stay away when i know its no good



## Shaunee (Oct 10, 2012)

I know that im with someone who treats me like crap. We argue and fight then the following day he expects me to be all chirpy again and when im not he says that all i want to do is argue which is incorrect. We live together and i own 90% of all household goods. My family have said that they will help me move (im with them now due to last nights row) but he makes it difficult by playing with my emotions. He called half an hour ago and said 'hi my darling' in a happy voice, i was upset and angry so i hung up. I immediately started to cry and thought to myself, maybe i should just stay i mean, i do love him lots...but i think the problem is that im not feeling loved back and it hurts - so i try and resolve issues with him but this in turn causes more. What do you base staying with someone on? How do you move on from an abusive partner and stay away? This just takes all my energy from me, i dont even have the energy to get out of bed sometimes i just lie their and think, think, think.


----------



## Holland (Aug 20, 2012)

Shaunee said:


> I know that im with someone who treats me like crap. We argue and fight then the following day he expects me to be all chirpy again and when im not he says that all i want to do is argue which is incorrect. We live together and i own 90% of all household goods. My family have said that they will help me move (im with them now due to last nights row) but he makes it difficult by playing with my emotions. He called half an hour ago and said 'hi my darling' in a happy voice, i was upset and angry so i hung up. I immediately started to cry and thought to myself, maybe i should just stay i mean,* i do love him lots.*..but i think the problem is that im not feeling loved back and it hurts - so i try and resolve issues with him but this in turn causes more. What do you base staying with someone on? How do you move on from an abusive partner and stay away? This just takes all my energy from me, i dont even have the energy to get out of bed sometimes i just lie their and think, think, think.


When someone abuses you and you say "I love him" I think what it really means is that you don't love yourself enough to see clearly. 

You have a network of support around you, call on them to give you the strength to do what you need to do to be whole. That may mean some serious counselling or it may mean ending the relationship.


----------



## BK LV (Oct 14, 2012)

Shaunee said:


> I know that im with someone who treats me like crap. We argue and fight then the following day he expects me to be all chirpy again and when im not he says that all i want to do is argue which is incorrect. We live together and i own 90% of all household goods. My family have said that they will help me move (im with them now due to last nights row) but he makes it difficult by playing with my emotions. He called half an hour ago and said 'hi my darling' in a happy voice, i was upset and angry so i hung up. I immediately started to cry and thought to myself, maybe i should just stay i mean, i do love him lots...but i think the problem is that im not feeling loved back and it hurts - so i try and resolve issues with him but this in turn causes more. What do you base staying with someone on? How do you move on from an abusive partner and stay away? This just takes all my energy from me, i dont even have the energy to get out of bed sometimes i just lie their and think, think, think.


Hi Shaunee:

It is not right to be the one receive verbally abuse that causes one to be depressed. Very sorry to hear what you are going through.
If you feel unsafe around him, you need to let your family know. Base on your information, your family is very supportive and very close to you.
You do not want verbal abuse to become physical abuse. Consider you are providing 90% of financial, than he should feel lucky.
If there's no way to reconnect and you have yet to be in long term relationship or married, there's always better person out there, don't rush into things like I did.

My story is 13 years long, have a kid and did not know my spouse will become the person today.

When there's sign of anger, if you and him can't calmly discuss your difference, than its time to move on. 
Physical item can be replaced, if you have proof you own 90% and if he refuse to return, you can always turn to the law to assist.
Lasty, remember personal hurt takes longer time to repair than dishes and house items. 
Do not let his negativity effect your life and cause you to not get out of bed and live a life.


----------



## indiecat (Sep 24, 2012)

We go to counseling together or we are done is what you tell him


----------

