# Help !



## Tullytara (Dec 26, 2011)

Ok so 4 weeks into seperation

HIM - ur being unreasonable about when i can have the kids
ME- you can see the children mon 4-7 wed4-7 friday from 4overnight till sat 5pm
HIM- NO i dont get enough time on my own i have to pick A*** up for school and bring him home and do 2 hospital appointments for D*** next week im not a taxi and u expect me to have the kids onthose nights as well.
ME- Whats the problem
HIM - i have plans for a friend to come up friday and sat they going sunday.

(this friend is the new gf who he only met friday31 spent new eve at her haouse and all day sunday)

ME- Well im sorry but i have the kids all day everyday and dont get a night off till sat be glad ur not having them sat night too.
HIM- thats not good enough i need my weekends to rest 
ME- When do i get my rest?
HIM - WHEN I HAVE THE KIDS THROUGH THE WEEK (he shouts at me)
ME- thats when i get my cleaning done and tidy up and run to the shops etc
HIM -whatu do with ur time is up to u, but i am not having them this sat 
ME- You are because your children should be more important then some girl u only have to wait 6 weeks and we will be out of the country and out of your life.
HIM- i need a break ....... 

HE HUNG UP THE PHONE.

ok my youngest 2 and1/2 is special needs and has to attend a few appoinments we have two next week when school starts up again, my oldest goes to the local school but because we have aweful weather i wont walk him as i can risk my youngest getting ill again, 

he has sunday free tuesday free thursday free , at the moment and the other days he just has the kids for 3 hours on the evening , so technicly he has all week free bar saturday. i love my boys but its taking an toll on me, and until i move home i have no help, i cant trust my one set of friends as something i said in trust to them got back to the hubby. they were the only people i said it too.

what am i to do he thinks that he shouldnt have to look after the kids or do the hospital appointments anymore dont know where he gets this advice from but i need to know what i can do am i doing the right thing?
If i stop access i think its gonna cause more trouble


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## paperclip (Feb 24, 2011)

Never stop access to his children...

With that said, just from personal experience. Having the children alternate every other day between parents is not the best idea for the interest of the children exp. if they are not even sleeping over there. who will have them do their homework? Who will bathe them? 

With that said. You guys need to come up with a better and agreeable parenting plan. Such as 1 complete week on or one complete week off. Every other weekend.

Edited: You both should be doing doctors appointments and that stuff with the kids.


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## Tullytara (Dec 26, 2011)

there wasnt a problem until this female came onto the scene plus its only been 4 weeks so we are trying to get intoa proper groove, untill i return home i am giving him every chance to see the kids, i dont want to stop the access thats never been my intention, i want my boys to have the best of both worlds my eldest has adhd so routine needs to be kept in place, which ois why i tried to keep it everyother day, so he still gets to see Dad, 

Sadley because Dad has moved back in with his mom and dad and they have this idea that the routine that we have in place doesnt apply in their house, and since the counsellor thinks that a week on and week off would be deterimental to his progress, that cant happen. 
i have said about the weekends where he still has the kids overnight on the friday but drops them back at 12 so he get that afternoon and all day sunday. 

i thought that about the appointments through just need to get it through to him


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