# Does this seem odd



## LilyPAD (Jul 31, 2012)

I ask my husband to request his brother to give us an fpl bill so that we can put our son at his address, so my husband says for me to give him a call and ask, but I tell my husband that doesn't respond to me, that's his brother and it pertains to personal papers so I tell him to ask his brother for it.

But, then his brother wants me to sell a boat on the internet and wants me to put the information to sell the boat so I'm in need of the model of the boat, so then I call my husband so he can tell me the model he says "I dont know" so then I call his brother if he can give me the model of the boat.

Now, the question is that my husband says that I can ask him for the model but he does'nt get why I can't ask him for the personal paperwork to put my son in his address. He flipps out about this.

what do you think?


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

I'm not sure I understand your post. First, by fpl bill, do you mean a utility bill? What are you trying to accomplish? Are you trying to get your son into a certain school district or something and using your brother in law's address to qualify?

And why do you need to be the one to sell the boat online? I don't know, it seems to me that if you're "personal" enough with the brother to sell his boat online then you should be able to ask him for an electric bill. But if you guys want to use his address for some reason for your son and he doesn't know about it, then I agree it would be best for your husband to break the news to him.


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## LilyPAD (Jul 31, 2012)

Yes an utility bill to place my son at a school. but I just think this is a more personal issue than placing an add on the net. lmao!


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## CantePe (Oct 5, 2011)

You know if they catch you doing that they will expel your son from the school right?

I don't see why you can't ask for it yourself. Even at that, they want YOUR name on a utility bill from that address to prove you live there. Is your name on any of them? Your husband's? Still not going to work if your name isn't on any of those utility bills...


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## LilyPAD (Jul 31, 2012)

They have the same last name!


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Doesn't matter. You have to your husband's name on a bill.

You could go to the school district and ask for a permit for that school. We did that with my oldest.


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## LilyPAD (Jul 31, 2012)

Yes but that is not the point we are getting off subject. I know all that the problem is the way my husband flipps out!


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## LilyPAD (Jul 31, 2012)

Any more comments please!


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## kindi (Apr 28, 2012)

I am having a really hard time following the original post.

I've tried several times and I still don't get it.


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## Prodigal (Feb 5, 2011)

You have received comments that asked for additional information. Not only that, they were thoughtful comments, in that the people responding put a lot of thought into their responses.

You want to find a way around the law or a way to get your son into a particular school via the backdoor? Sorry, but I think you may have come to the wrong place for that kind of advice.

BTW, people here do the best they can to give intelligent responses. You don't like the answers? Don't ask the question!


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## Prodigal (Feb 5, 2011)

kindi said:


> I am having a really hard time following the original post.
> 
> I've tried several times and I still don't get it.


Don't worry ... nobody else knows what the he!! this person is seeking, based on their unacceptable responses, according to the OP.


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

I've actually been in situations where my wife wants to bend the rules to benefit one of our kids. Sometimes I don't really want to bend the rules the way she does, I just don't feel comfortable doing it. Then on top of wanting to do something I don't feel comfortable with, she wants me to be the one to call and make it happen.

Don't know if that's what's going on here or not. But if you want this thing done, do it yourself. Sounds like your husband doesn't want to do it and I can't say that I blame him.

I actually had a distant relative call and ask if he could use my address to set up a corporation because my state doesn't have an income tax and his does. HELLO??? I'm a CPA and could lose my license for something like that. Did he really think I was going to risk my career and the income I provide for my family so that he could save a few bucks in tax?


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Your husband flips out because:
1. He doesn't want to ask for help.
2. He doesn't want to break the rules.

Basically, he doesn't want to do it and doesn't appreciate the constant asking. That's called nagging when you don't want to do something.

Maybe you should ask. You are all family.

If the school won't accept permits, then move to the area so your chil can go to that school.


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## bluelaser (May 26, 2012)

kindi said:


> I am having a really hard time following the original post.
> 
> I've tried several times and I still don't get it.


You are not alone 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## kindi (Apr 28, 2012)

i have the confusion narrowed down to this:



LilyPAD said:


> my husband says that I can ask him for the model but he does'nt get why I can't ask him for the personal paperwork to put my son in his address.


If you can just answer these two questions I might be able to help you out.

Why can't you ask your husband for the personal paperwork for your son, and why can't your husband get why you can't ask him for the personal paperwork for your son?


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## costa200 (Jun 27, 2012)

Alright her problem is that she wants her husband to ask BIL for the bill for the kid's school, but the husband says that if she is selling the BIL's boat online she should have no problem asking for the bill. 

Basically the problem is that she doesn't feel comfortable asking for the bill and the husband doesn't get the difference between the two situations. 

I read poorly written texts all day long. 

To the OP, if this is something you both want and agree on, your husband should be the one to ask your brother in law because after all, it's his brother, and you're not comfortable with it. Can't understand his position, unless he doesn't agree with what you're doing!


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## LilyPAD (Jul 31, 2012)

My husband just wanted, for ME to ask his brother, but I said "that is your brother, why should I ask for that information." 

Well what ever,:sleeping: I already asked my sister-in-law, she said it was fine. I know I may go to the school district and ask for the transfer but its time spending believe me -  I rather just get it over with, and get the utility bill. 

The problem is that he wants me to do everything, when I say everything is everything, solve all problems pay all bills he does not take any resposibility for nothing just go to work and bring the paycheck.


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## kindi (Apr 28, 2012)

LilyPAD said:


> The problem is that he wants me to do everything, when I say everything is everything, solve all problems pay all bills he does not take any resposibility for nothing just go to work and bring the paycheck.


This is the real problem, isn't it?

He works full time and supports you and the kids, but you feel like you're getting the short end of the stick and you resent him for it.


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## Hicks (Jan 14, 2011)

Maybe your husband is uncomfortable peforming immoral and/or illegal acts at your direction.


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## CantePe (Oct 5, 2011)

You know you are taking a spot from another family by breaking the law for the school thing. There are reasons why you have to go through the proper channels. I think that's an extremely selfish thing to do.

As for your original question. I work full time, husband works part time (me sometimes 10 days in a row, him 2 days a week) and *I* still do all of the appointment scheduling, bill paying, groceries, etc. He does most if not all the house work and child rearing (when I'm not home or working night shift and sleeping the next day).

I'm just better at bills, appointments, groceries and what not. I've accepted that fact. He's a better cook and house keeper than I am and he's accepted that fact. You have to give a little to get a little and trade back and forth.

I haven't touched laundry in over 8 months thanks to husband (he knows I hate laundry) and I appreciate it so much. We trade off things, he hasn't needed to make an appointment or pay a bill in over 3 years - I do that. He appreciates it because it's just too stressful for him to handle.

Give a little, get a little.


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## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

OP wants her H to do all the work bending the rules, even though she knows he is uncomfortable doing it. it probably goes against his principles and this is just a sh1t test to see if he will stand his ground and cave - its kind of a lose/lose for him because if he doesn't she resents him and if he does she ultimately loses his respect.

My ex used to do this to me once in awhile too, make me fight the stupid battles she would pick - I usually stood up for my W, except when she was asking me to go against my own principles. In which case I suppose I accepted the resentment against me. but she saw that as always taking the other side.


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## CantePe (Oct 5, 2011)

LilyPAD said:


> They have the same last name!


THAT DOESN'T MATTER!!! DO YOU LIVE THERE, IS YOUR BIL ON THE BIRTH CERTIFICATE, DOES YOUR HUSBAND OR CHILD LIVE THERE....

No? THEN IT DOESN'T MATTER! The child is not your BIL or SIL's biological child and does not live in the household. YOU ARE BREAKING THE LAW.

Your solution - MOVE to the jurisdiction of that school or REQUEST a transfer or approval of transfer to that school under special circumstances. Again : YOU ARE BREAKING THE LAW!!!


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## GTdad (Aug 15, 2011)

Hicks said:


> Maybe your husband is uncomfortable peforming immoral and/or illegal acts at your direction.


He may well be, but he's at fault as well for not stopping this nonsense cold.


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## kindi (Apr 28, 2012)

CantePe said:


> You know you are taking a spot from another family by breaking the law for the school thing.


That would only be true if the school is so full they can't handle any more students.


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## ShawnD (Apr 2, 2012)

CantePe said:


> *You know if they catch you doing that they will expel your son from the school right?*
> 
> I don't see why you can't ask for it yourself. Even at that, they want YOUR name on a utility bill from that address to prove you live there. Is your name on any of them? Your husband's? Still not going to work if your name isn't on any of those utility bills...


Probably a lot worse than this. Knowingly putting false information on a government form is called perjury.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Yea, having a utility bill from someone, even with the same last name, DOES NOT MATTER unless it's YOUR name or your husband's name.

I know this because I've been a teacher for 12 years. I've seen a lot of people try to pull this crap and they are sent away.

it's not that time consuming to get a transfer. You print it out from online, get your home school to sign it and get her enrolled at the new school (call them first to see if they honor these permits).

Good luck.


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## CantePe (Oct 5, 2011)

I hate when people do this because I have special needs kids and certain schools in our district have limited positions that can be filled by students within their spec ed classes... That means that even the children not in spec ed classes count as a the total of students they can accommodate. Which means people like OP who take a spot for their child while not being in the district of the school potentially remove a spot for a child who would normally have that spot.

Mind you, my Autistic kiddo goes to a school for exceptional children (only 34 kids but only 40 spots).

That was a special request transfer, the time I spent on that transfer was one meeting with the school she was in for 5 days and a telephone conversation. 3 hrs tops and the paperwork was done between the two schools and school board... NOT THAT TIME CONSUMING. Worth every minute of time I spent doing so.

It's like a person cutting in line at a grocery store while the line runs down the aisle. Nobody likes line cutters - same thing here.


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## CantePe (Oct 5, 2011)

kindi said:


> That would only be true if the school is so full they can't handle any more students.


BULL...there is a reason there are districts and jurisdictions whether they are at capacity or not. Rules are rules and for a dang good reason.

While a school may be able to accommodate 500 students building and grounds wise they may not be able to do so staff wise. There are laws that dictate how many children per staff.

Excuses are no excuse.


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