# Menopause



## debrajean (Dec 27, 2007)

I'm at that age and I've been told that menopause decreases a woman's sexual appetite. I guess it's true b/c I'm finding I have less and less interest in my husband. It may be b/c I'm finding him less attractive or his demands for sex or a combination of the three. If it's just menopause, I've heard that there are OTC medicines for this. Can someone recommend one that actually works?


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## MMA_FIGHTER (Feb 2, 2009)

if you dont mind me asking, how old are you because my wife is getting up in age as well and i know its only a matter of time before i experience this with her. i just want to know when i should start expecting all this...she is 38 right now and im 32...
thanks


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

i believe that my wife (45) is beginning the process. i would think 38 is a bit young but i'm no expert.

i will tell you its like living with 7 different people and i dont know from day to day which one will show up.

i do applaud you for wanting to improve the situation. mine couldn't care less


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## DownButNotOut (Apr 9, 2009)

First 38 is NOT "getting up in age"!

Menopause is different for each woman. I believe, in general mid-40's to mid 50's is when the process begins.

But, you can get much more, and much better information on the medical side with a simple google.


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

debrajean-

My wife is 47 and getting hotter. Every woman is different. Some women actually experience a rise in libido due to the fact that the testosterone levels decrease less than the other hormones. So this leaves the testosterone at a higher percentage relative to other hormones present, compared to what it was in her youth. 

Testosterone causes women to grow facial hair, and is widely believed to drive libido in women. So it's the women who are constantly bleaching their moustache, that are the ones to watch out for 

You said in another thread:



debrajean said:


> My husband recently complained about not getting enough sex and my response to him (after years of this happening) was, "Did you ever wonder why I'm not into having a lot of sex with you?"
> "B/C you're an icebox?" was his answer.
> I had to take a deep breath to keep from calling him a nasty name,
> "No, b/c maybe I'm sick of you getting all the enjoyment while I lie here wondering where my enjoyment is as you roll over and fall asleep. I'd rather not even begin to have sex than end up being dissatisfied each time."


So this would indicate that there are thing your husband could be doing to make life easier for both of you.


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## MMA_FIGHTER (Feb 2, 2009)

DownButNotOut said:


> First 38 is NOT "getting up in age"!
> 
> Menopause is different for each woman. I believe, in general mid-40's to mid 50's is when the process begins.
> 
> But, you can get much more, and much better information on the medical side with a simple google.


well first of all, she is not getting any younger...second, GOOGLE SCHMOOGLE...MT is the only "GOOGLE" i need for my inquiries...i mean, i know i could google it but just because things get googled doesnt mean you always get the right answers...besides..i was basically looking for a time frame and what to expect. i wasnt looking to get into the scientific rocket science aspect of it. just laymens terms...like when she turns 45she will become a total beeotch, she will hate you forever and let you know that you are the source of all her problems..
things of that nature....you know good wholesome thoughts.
peace


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

A man wrote to me on another forum and said his wife went from sex NON STOP to no sex at all when the menopause hit. However, I never got all the other juicy information I needed to really get to the bottom of it. Some women experience a hormone drop and want to do something about it. Other women just don't care. But when you look deeply into the whole situation, and terrible picture sometimes emerges. Here is a worse case scenario:

The wife reaches 48 and stops allowing sex. Four years go by. The kids have grown up so the man (who has crawled the walls in frustration so long there are foot holds in the ceiling) could leave, but he doesn't because he is 49, bald, fat, and dishevelled looking. He knows no-one will wan him.

And, surprise surprise... his appearance is not exactly tempting to his wife. 

When a woman's libido is down due to hormones, everything else should be done to make up for it. The man should get in shape. The woman should start thinking about sex more; reading books on the subject, or maybe reading novels with a sexy undercurrent. 

I once read an article by a female sexologist who was researching low libido in women. She came to the conclusion that part of the reason that most men are perpetually horny is because they have a little porn machine running in their brain 24/7 - whereas women do not gravitate to thinking about sex quite so often. The sexologist recommended that women should read steamy novels etc. to try to keep their brain on sex a bit more.

Women often get turned on by reading about sex on forums. There have been some quite arousing threads on this site for instance that have certainly made me want to go to bed early


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## blessed1 (May 24, 2009)

Well, all of the articles are very interesting to say the least. I am 50 yrs old and I am in menopause now. I haven't seen red in about 3 maybe 4 mos. I am also a newely wed got married 05-05-09 and my husband is playing games by holding out on sex and sleeping on the couch a week and counting. I would love to have it everynight but my husband tells me he is not going to let me drain him. But before we were married he wanted it and I was trying to hold out until we got married due to religious beliefs. It was very difficult for him to keep his hands off of me. I laying next to me could feel each pulse of him as he laid close behind me. Now its a whole other story. I have been growing facial hair for about 29 years and it is now growing like a wild fire. I have to hot wax my chin more often, now that my cycles have stopped. I don't know about other women that have gone through but I have been told that most women want more of it and to be married should be an extra goodie. Since you are the one being deprived dear husband my heart goes out to you. Hopefully you can get some type of medication or counseling for this. Because without acknowledgement of this problem on her part and you trying to support her its going to be a bumpy ride. I know it has been hard for you because you are the man in this situation, I feel that hot and steamy sex hopefully without the thought of birthcontrol and pregnancy is every married couples right. If she is not a willing participant like my husban then you will be hot and miserable like I am and a newly wed to top it off. I just started exercising and working out more since I am trying to drop another 39 lbs. I have already lost 57 lbs, however he saw me when I was 57 lbs heavier but we were only friends then, and we got along beautifully. I could always feel the energy between us, but its so different now that we are married. Menopause for me has meant more desire and less sex per my husbands actions. By the way good luck and hopefully good sex!
blessed1;-)


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

blessed1-

One way to stop you husband feeling drain is to get him to practise semen retention: Semen Retention That's what I do, and it charges me up every time. When I got over the age of about 38, I used to feel a bit drained from ejaculation if I did it more than 3 times per week. Now at 42, I can go every day all day.


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## Sufficiently Breathless (May 18, 2009)

I would suggest any woman going through "the change" seek advise from her doctor. 

My mother is 55 and going through menopause. She has stated that soy products to help to elliviate some symptoms. examples, soymilk, tofu, roasted soy nuts ect ect. It has also been suggested to her to try taking a vitiman E supplement 800IU per day. She was asked to try it for three months and see if she noticed any changes in her symptoms.

If you have a bit of depression and anxiety caused by menopause, Asian Ginsing may help reduce the effects of that. 

There are many different theories and studies out there that show how natural supplements may help... but I still advise seeing your doctor!


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