# What is best???



## loiue (Sep 7, 2011)

Hi all. Feeling like my relationship is at an end. I try to appreciate my partner. I try to listen to him take his advice etc. I tell him I love him, he does most of the time.
Then there are other times where he is angry and stressed and bitter he tells me he hates me when i do certain things, calls me names, says im lazy and a slob and he tells me to keep acting the way i am and i am just adding to his list that makes him want to leave, and that one day he will. 
I understand that he is stressed, works long hours, we have personal problems, that all cause stress and anxiety with him. I am trying to be understanding and think he doesn't mean it and usually he will apologize but then we always seem to be back to sqaure one.
I feel that we have grown apart, I still love him and i think he still loves me. We seem to be too different to even get along sometimes. I love him but i feel that i am the complete oposite of what he wants and the type of person he wants to be with, and when he belittles me and berates me I dont like it.
I dont know what to do? 
I dont know what is best for everyones wellbeing? We have 2 kids and we are expecting a third. I dont know if separating will be best for my childrens wellbeing? 
Does anyone have any ideas or advice? I am mainly concerned how a separation will affect my kids.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

That is very emotionally abusive 

Just because someone is stressed doesn't mean they should go around saying these things. Threatening to leave is mean. It makes you walk on eggshells and doesn't make for a healthy marriage or relationship.

Would he ever be up for counseling?


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## loiue (Sep 7, 2011)

Ive suggested it. He isnt keen doesnt see how talking about things will help.
I suspect he is depressed sometimes when i suggest seeing a gp or counsellor he doesnt see the point.
I was seeing a cousellor for some other personal reasons. He sat in with me and doesnt understand how it helps.

I love him and want to help but am at a loss because we always end up in the same situtations arguments etc. 

There is lack of trust on both sides of the relationship so i dont feel that helps and ok i am partly to blame but he isnt perfect either.

I have read some of your other posts that_girl and think it is great that you are getting help with your own issues.


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