# I'm so scared!



## Elisenowlin (Apr 14, 2013)

Hi, I am going through a divorce, my decision, from my husband who is abusive in every aspect of life. Money, car, times of being home, physically, mentally, calls me worthless... And the list does on and on.

What I need to know is, he is claiming me and my kids on taxes, won't give me the amount of RETIRN or let me see it. My car is broke down, I have ZERO money and am living with my alcoholic mom and drug addicted brother with my two BEAUTIFUL AND INNOCENT children that aren't his. We don't have kids together... Anyways, I live in a community property state. He makes VERY GOOD money and I have stayed home for 4 years raising his two and my two as a sahm, allowance weekly but, not much. I was a slave. 

I had an idea. Can I take a loan out with him & I before the divorce is served? Car loan? Anything. To help me get by? Is this illegal? I am desperate and don't know what else to do. The state won't help, he maks too much money?!!


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## hurtnohio (Jul 17, 2011)

You need to talk to a lawyer. Some women's shelters can connect you with attorneys who will help women leaving abusive relationships for free. Check around.

If nothing officially has been filed yet, it is my understanding that you two could still take out loans. But I'd be up-front with the folks lending you the money. I did this recently in my divorce. We refinanced the house so the payments she'll eventually be making on her own will be lower. We were completely up-front and honest about our situation. While technically no paperwork had been filed yet (or so I thought), it still seemed a little shady to me to not give any potential lenders a heads-up. The lender worked with us to make sure everything was on the up-and-up.

But don't take my advice. You really need to talk to a lawyer.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Elisenowlin said:


> Hi, I am going through a divorce, my decision, from my husband who is abusive in every aspect of life. Money, car, times of being home, physically, mentally, calls me worthless... And the list does on and on. [/QUOT]
> Ok, so you have left him….. good
> 
> 
> ...


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## Morgiana (Oct 18, 2011)

How long has it been since you worked? Have you looked into getting a job yet? You are going to have to be able to support yourself and your two kids. Even if your husband makes a good bit, you aren't likely to get any alimony from a 4 year marriage; and since the kids aren't his there won't be any child support either. You need to figure out long term what you are going to do to pay for your living expenses, but for short term relief, look up the aid organizations like the previous poster suggested.


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