# Is she a cool wife?



## lolo238 (Nov 3, 2009)

The wife of my husband's high school friend arranged a guys-only strippers party at a hotel room for her husband's 40th birthday. The wife will not attend the party and it is a surprised party for the husband. My husband is invited and think it is a cool and fun party for his buddy. I am a bit confused and would like to hear comments. Is she a cool wife or she has a different value?


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## JamesM (Sep 17, 2009)

lolo238 said:


> Is she a cool wife or she has a different value?


Yes and yes.

The next question is...will she be mad if the stripper goes too far with her husband? And are any other married men going to be "allowed" to go without repercussion.

Why tempt your husband unless he is allowed to be fulfilled?


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## bestblu1 (Oct 21, 2009)

Yes, she is a weird wife and she is setting her marriage up for future problems. My wife would never approve of me attending a bachelor party with a stripper and I would not expect her to.


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## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

i dont know if she's a cool wife, but trying to be a cool wife is what got me into some problems in my marriage. I am not a cool wife anymore, but my marriage is much better.


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## Minncouple (Sep 9, 2009)

Not sure on the cool wife thing, sounds more like a wife with possible issues, sorry just my .02 cents.

I simply don't get the whole "guys hall pass' thing. Are they like that unhappy or chained down that they need a Hall Pass to have fun. How does the wife feel about feeling like she is the one keeping her husband from doing these things and LETTING him out of jail for a night?

I would rather go to a strip club WITH my wife and have a good time. My wife would have no issue with me going, and I would have no issue with her going, BUT both of us would rather do something like this together.

If I was invited I would pass on it, again just don't get the who Hall Pass thing.


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## Tweak (Nov 18, 2009)

If I was in this situation as a Husband,it would make me uncomfortable.Also then the whole sexual frustration thing about after the "party" would be there.

Sounds like maybe she is testing her husband.


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

Freud once said "Sometimes a cigarette is just a cigarette". she sounds cool to me. Why are you guys always looking for the pit-falls. Sometimes you gotta grab life by the horns with both hands. I am nearly 43. My hands are still firm. They may not be when I'm 103.


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## Minncouple (Sep 9, 2009)

Dont get me wrong Mark, I'd be into the strip club, nude thing, but IMHO it would be alot more fun with couples there. Why hang out with just guys when doing this. We have been to strip clubs and other more risky places and had a great time.

Again, maybe its just me, but the whole frat night thing is soooo 2005.


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

Minncouple said:


> Dont get me wrong Mark, I'd be into the strip club, nude thing, but IMHO it would be alot more fun with couples there. Why hang out with just guys when doing this. We have been to strip clubs and other more risky places and had a great time.


Agree, more fun with couples


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## noki (Dec 14, 2009)

I know my hubby would NOT be encouraged to go!


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## Rags (Aug 2, 2010)

I wouldn't go without my wife. If I was going to be turned on, I'd want here there to be a part of it.

Not going to judge someone else, but it wouldn't work for me.


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

I'm conflicted on this one. The "H" in question is an adult and could go see strippers anytime he wished if that was what he wanted. He apparently doesn't. This stripper business is apparently a one-shot entertainment for a special occasion. If my wife were invited to a Chipendales for a friend's birthday, I wouldn't have a problem with it. In a way, it's sweet that the man's wife wants to do something special for his birthday. I personally think hiring strippers is a little juvenile, but that's a matter of taste.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

Not sure about the coolness, as other men's wive's will definetly *not *think so! Not want their husbands alone with a bunch of horny men & some hot naked strippers, not knowing what is happening, worrying all night her man might be touching them, flirting with them. Some would be facing alot of questions when they finally got home -from the typical woman anyway. 

I think it would be alot more entertaining, and more Fun for all to go "with him" to a strip club that would bring him up on stage for all his buddies (and wives daring enough to go) and watch it all up close, just to see his reaction. 

Me & my husband go every so many months- with some guy friends, he wants me to go with him, even said he wouldnt go if I didnt want too. 

It is always a barrel of fun & laughs to see the guys who go on stage (costs about $100), The strippers dance around him while he sits in a chair -he is not allowed to touch, they walk on his legs to climb the pole, then one jumps down off the pole unto his lap -REALLY HARD (almost looks dangerous- heavens, the man better not have it UP), then they slowly take his belt off , put him on all fours, one stripper walks him like a dog while the other rides him, then they smack him real hard with one loud whip with his belt, then he gets to watch how one of the strippers use the pole so gracefully, then it is HIS turn ! And he will get awfully booohed if he doesn't try. It is the funniest thing ever. Most uptight wives would even be laughing at this point! 

Now a wife that allowed this, instead of a private all men all nighter alone in a hotel room, Yeah, this would be cool and so much less worry from the wives. IN a controlled environment.


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## CH (May 18, 2010)

Is the wife testing her husband or trying to make him get caught in the act. Pretty sure there will be camera phones and alot of pics taken.

Or maybe they both have an open relationship and are cool doing that to each other.

Too many variables, but I wouldn't say she's a cool wife. But if that's what gets them off, more power to the both of them.


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## Liam_680 (Aug 31, 2010)

She is definitely a cool wife and has a different set of values. it is cool to allow your husband to have fun but its not really good to be that encouraging that she would even organize the party and include strippers in it.. Maybe she really trusts her husband but that is something I would never ever do to my partner..


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## Rob774 (Sep 27, 2010)

MarkTwain said:


> Freud once said "*Sometimes a cigarette is just a cigarette*". she sounds cool to me. Why are you guys always looking for the pit-falls. Sometimes you gotta grab life by the horns with both hands. I am nearly 43. My hands are still firm. They may not be when I'm 103.


Thank You!!!
She's trying to do something nice for her husband's 40th. Its not like this is something she does everyday. Not every man loses his mind at these things and has to sneak off to have an affair. The whole concept of concerning trust is probably not an issue in their marriage. If her husband had an addiction to these clubs, then i'd say, no this is not a good idea. Its like giving somebody who has a porm problem tickents to an Adult Video Convention.

I've been to these things, and it was cool, but i didn't lose my mind. Ladies if your husband wants to ocassionally do this and your marriage is secure, to me its not that big of a deal. Have a concern??? Sex him like crazy before and after he gets back!!!


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## Freak On a Leash (Feb 19, 2010)

Rob774 said:


> Thank You!!!
> She's trying to do something nice for her husband's 40th. Its not like this is something she does everyday. Not every man loses his mind at these things and has to sneak off to have an affair. The whole concept of concerning trust is probably not an issue in their marriage. If her husband had an addiction to these clubs, then i'd say, no this is not a good idea. Its like giving somebody who has a porm problem tickents to an Adult Video Convention.
> 
> I've been to these things, and it was cool, but i didn't lose my mind. Ladies if your husband wants to ocassionally do this and your marriage is secure, to me its not that big of a deal. Have a concern??? Sex him like crazy before and after he gets back!!!


:iagree: :iagree:

Nice to see that someone shares my point of view! No, I'm NOT deranged or naive and I say "Everything in moderation". I mean, it's not good to be addicted to porn but is it so bad to check it out once in awhile on the internet, watch an XX rated movie or buy a magazine? I don't think so..

That said...

IMO it depends on the husband. Some men can't be trusted but if that's the case there's something wrong to begin with. A faithful husband isn't going to suddently turn into an animal because a half naked female shows up. 

My husband and I have other problems but one of them is NOT infidelity. I know he wouldn't and has never cheated on me. It just isn't in his moral code. I've know the guy for 30 years and feel I have a pretty good fix on this. 

So yeah, I was "in" on the planning with his friends to have a stripper at his bachelor party. AFAIK everyone behaved themselves. Let's give adult men some credit here..they aren't all mindless animals who HAVE to climb on top of every women they see! 

I've also had no problems with his going to see topless dancers with his buddies from time to time...although one of his friends was horrified that I knew about it and begged me not to tell his wife! :rofl: I assured him that wouldn't be happening. 

I'm a trusting and realistic "cool" wife. I'm also that way with my kids. My lord, we've gotten so paranoid and uptight these days!

My .02 cents: If the guy is going to stray, he's going to stray regardless of the wife dogging his every move and being hypersensitive and paranoid isn't going to change anything. 

I don't care where he gets his appetite...as long as he eats at home.  If he goes to see a stripper and comes home "in the mood" that's icing on the cake.

Also, I have NO desire to go to a strip club with my husband. I'd rather go see a band at a rock bar/concert and THEN come home and have wild sex (been there, done that). I have no desire to see half naked females. 

Also, hate to break to you ladies but there is a certain atmosphere and camaraderie among guys that is definitely NOT the same if the wives are there. When are women going to figure this out? Guys need "guy time" just like women need "gal time". It's human nature and there's nothing wrong with it.


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## DawnD (Sep 23, 2009)

Freak On a Leash said:


> :iagree: :iagree:
> 
> Also, hate to break to you ladies but there is a certain atmosphere and camaraderie among guys that is definitely NOT the same if the wives are there. When are women going to figure this out? Guys need "guy time" just like women need "gal time". It's human nature and there's nothing wrong with it.


 My H would totally disagree with you here LMAO. He always wants me to go now, begs me because of all the special attention I get when I am there with him. With his friends, just us, he always wants me to be there. Something about watching another woman touching me gets him all riled up LMAO


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## Freak On a Leash (Feb 19, 2010)

DawnD said:


> My H would totally disagree with you here LMAO. He always wants me to go now, begs me because of all the special attention I get when I am there with him. With his friends, just us, he always wants me to be there. Something about watching another woman touching me gets him all riled up LMAO


Well, that might be your husband and I congratulate you on that. :smthumbup: But I'll wager most men don't feel like that. Most men I know (and I know quite a few) want to hang out at a "gentlemen's club" without their significant others being there and I am one wife who has no desire to go out to be there with them and I don't want another woman touching me, that's for sure!

My husband loves when I go with him to a concert, to see a band at a club and/or bar..we do it almost every weekend. He gets off on me smoking cigars too. But for me to go a strip club and see half naked women making love to a pole? Nah, he definitely wants to be with the guys (and they don't want me there either!) and it's definitely not for me.

Now when he comes home I'll definitely show him that he's got a lot better waiting on him...

Now If I wanted to play on both sides of the fence it might be different..but I don't. Not that there's anything wrong with for those who do or just get off on being at a strip club with their guys and like checking out the girls. Heck, I'm open minded but not of that mindset.


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## Rob774 (Sep 27, 2010)

Freak On a Leash said:


> Well, that might be your husband and I congratulate you on that. :smthumbup: But I'll wager most men don't feel like that. *Most men *I know (and I know quite a few) want to hang out at a "gentlemen's club" without their significant others being there and I am one wife who has no desire to go out to be there with them and I don't want another woman touching me, that's for sure!


:iagree:

I love my wife... i don't want her right next to me at the strip club. 

Just sayin...


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