# Girlfriend keeps disconnecting from me



## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

Hello

I have a major concern with my girlfriend. We have been together for 3 years total and me,her and her 2 kids all live together. Money has been tight. I'm working as many hours as I can on 3rd shift and going to college 4 days a week during the day so I can be there to see all of them in the evenings. I took today off and going to make it up on Friday. 

We have been going through a time period for the last year or so were she will disconnect from me emotionally. A little time passes and she gets back on track. The last time she did this it got really bad. To the point that she was having an emotional affair. Which as soon as I found out about it I brought it up to her. She seen the guy one more time after that and a lot of evidence suggests that she slept with him at that time. Side story we were still living together at the time but she wanted me to move out and I was putting my money together to do just that. She says that during this time she no longer considered us together. A couple days after the suspected "affair" she no longer wanted me to go. It was out of nowhere wanting us to adopt a child one day (she had a hysterectomy in 2001) and talking about one day potentially getting married. All of this happened about 2 months ago. 

The other guy still talks to her and she talks to him although nowhere near to the extent that she was. She is cordial but doesn't mention anything about wanting to have sex with him or hang out with him. Although he brings it up pretty frequently. She just usually does a "lol" or will say she's in a weird place and not really talking to anyone. She has yet to tell him that her and I are still together. I'm uncomfortable with it but when I mention it to her all she says is were not married and she will talk to whoever she wants but she will not cheat on me. 

Literally yesterday morning we woke up at 5:30am and first thing she said to me was "I feel disconnected from you" which for some reason I was surprised to hear her say that. I asked how long she had been feeling that way. She replied with just now. That's literally the way it happens. It will be random and out nowhere and may last for days. 

So yesterday this guy sent her some rap song about having sex and told her it reminded him of her and it as she told her sister swelled her ego up. I don't know if that will kick start things back up again but I'm on guard at this point. Not mentioning it or anything just on guard. She doesn't know I know her email password and she does all this stuff during her work hours.

I know she has some hormonal issues from the hysterectomy which she is supposed to be getting hormone treatment starting this week. She had to go and find a place that specially mixes it all up per individual. She gets low on testosterone and such. I don't know a lot about how hormones affect people but I'm curious if that could be a root cause for her random mood swings,aggression,depression,money problems. I initially thought she might be bi-polar or borderline but she won't get checked out for that. It took nearly a year just to get her to take a look at her hormones. 

She says I don't turn her on anymore also. She said last night that she really loves me and she's happy with me but I don't turn her on. She said there is no romance. Which her idea of romance and mine are different. She likes more theatrical romance. Example being out in public and sweeping her up in my arms and kissing her. I do that kind of thing here and there or will randomly take her by the hand and just dance with her in a public mall. I do it when I feel it's right not for spectacle. She says when I do it in public it feels forced and embarrassing. My usual idea of romance is just an example. Last week I sent the kids to their grandmothers for the night and turned off all the lights and lit candles. Made a great dinner and had flowers coming from the front door to the dining table to the bedroom. 

She also says she likes the "mating dance" you know like hunting and pursuing. She says people get to used to each other and knowing that they can pretty well have sex with each other whenever they want is boring and takes out the excitement. Which I agree but I don't really know how to go about hunting and pursuing a girlfriend that I live with,you know? Even back when we first started dating I never really hunted and pursued so to speak. We just clicked naturally and started hanging out and talking all the time. 

Thoughts? Thank you in advance for any suggestions,thoughts and taking the time to read this.


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## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

No one have any advice on this? Right now she's mad as hell at me. She blew all her money once again and after paying bills that were behind I don't have enough to feed us all till payday next week and as usual this is my fault...


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## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

I'm married a long time, l still try to be the man my wife wants to date. Routine kills a romance. You need spend at least 15 hours a week together, not with the kids or in front of tv.


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## jfv (May 29, 2012)

Itchy said:


> Hello
> 
> I have a major concern with my girlfriend. We have been together for 3 years total and me,her and her 2 kids all live together. Money has been tight. I'm working as many hours as I can on 3rd shift and going to college 4 days a week during the day so I can be there to see all of them in the evenings. I took today off and going to make it up on Friday.
> 
> ...


Why are you still letting her talk to a man she had an affair with?? She is disrespecting you every time she contacts him. Why are you putting up with this? 
So because you are not her husband she can talk to whomever she wants to regardless of your feelings? 
She is not a suitable companion. Unless you don't mind being cuckolded every time she gets bored, find someone who will respect you and the relationship. 
Oh yeah, DO NOT MARRY HER.


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## Fallen Mind (Jan 23, 2013)

She definitely does seem like she may fit borderline personality disorder (BPD). (I'm a graduate student studying clinical mental health) Here's a few reasons why:

- She likes spectacle romance and to make a scene of things.
- She sounds clingy, whether or not if it's with you or this other guy.
- Decreased satisfaction with you as a partner, but then her mood swings back and she suddenly feels needed when you seem distant. 

There's no way to know though for sure though unless she sees either a psychologist, counselor or psychiatrist. 

But I would first definitely stand my ground and tell her to stop talking to this guy. She will most likely make a scene and blame you, but you must endure through this and tell her that it's her. If the argument gets so bad that splitting up is brought up, it's your choice from there. If you say you want to split, she will most likely throw a huge fit (if she throws stuff around or hits walls then she's definitely BPD in my opinion). She then will most likely turn clingy and will not want you to leave her. 

You sound really unhappy, but it's your life and your choice. If you feel like this is going no where, I would leave. 

Good luck and stay strong!!!


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## Emerald (Aug 2, 2012)

Does she work or do you support her financially?


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## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

Emerald said:


> Does she work or do you support her financially?


She works and in all honesty makes more money than I do. She just spends all of it. She can get paid on Friday and be broke by Monday.


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## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

jfv said:


> Why are you still letting her talk to a man she had an affair with?? She is disrespecting you every time she contacts him. Why are you putting up with this?
> So because you are not her husband she can talk to whomever she wants to regardless of your feelings?
> She is not a suitable companion. Unless you don't mind being cuckolded every time she gets bored, find someone who will respect you and the relationship.
> Oh yeah, DO NOT MARRY HER.


I don't have any control over who she talks too. I've tried telling her before I'm uncomfortable with it and I do not want it happening. She just says were not married and she will talk to whoever she wants too and that I do not own her.


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## janefw (Jun 26, 2012)

Itchy said:


> I don't have any control over who she talks too. I've tried telling her before I'm uncomfortable with it and I do not want it happening. She just says were not married and she will talk to whoever she wants too and that I do not own her.


Does that work both ways? How would she react if you decided to flirt or have an emotional affairs. 

I am not going to diagnose her with any mental problems, she just sounds selfish and like she is not just that into you. Sorry.


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## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

Fallen Mind said:


> She definitely does seem like she may fit borderline personality disorder (BPD). (I'm a graduate student studying clinical mental health) Here's a few reasons why:
> 
> - She likes spectacle romance and to make a scene of things.
> - She sounds clingy, whether or not if it's with you or this other guy.
> ...


I wish she would go get checked out but she won't. I know there are 3 other members of her family who suffer from BPD. 

Right now I've decided I'm going to try to disconnect myself from this whole issue. I'm under way too much stress right now trying to sort out the financial side of things. I don't really know how to disconnect myself though. 

Right now? I am honestly very unhappy with the way things have happened. 

That's for certain. She blows things up bigger than they actually are where I'm concerned. If she has an issue with something I've done I'm always the bad guy that did something horrible and she's never to blame. Of course people always believe her.


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## janefw (Jun 26, 2012)

What are the things that you do that rile her?


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## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

janefw said:


> Does that work both ways? How would she react if you decided to flirt or have an emotional affairs.
> 
> I am not going to diagnose her with any mental problems, she just sounds selfish and like she is not just that into you. Sorry.


She says she would love it if I flirted with other girls because she likes to feel jealous and she knows she can trust me not to do anything. Which I'm not comfortable flirting with other people when I'm with someone. 

Who and what she's into bounces around a lot. She did tell me last night that she hopes everything works out for us in the end but she says when things are bad it's usually a sign that it's not to be.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

Why are you in this relationship? There's a sea of red flags from infidelity to financial irresponsibility, none of which bode well for a happy long term relationship. Are you thinking you can "fix" her? Good luck with that? Are you thinking she'll change if you marry her? She most likely will, but not for the better.

Personally, rather than investing time in your relationship with her, I'd recommend spending your time and effort in understanding your desire to stay in such an unhealthy relationship so you can prevent it from happening again. But that's just my thoughts, based in your posts...

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## janefw (Jun 26, 2012)

Itchy said:


> She says she would love it if I flirted with other girls because she likes to feel jealous and she knows she can trust me not to do anything. Which I'm not comfortable flirting with other people when I'm with someone.
> 
> Who and what she's into bounces around a lot. She did tell me last night that she hopes everything works out for us in the end but she says when things are bad it's usually a sign that it's not to be.


Seriously? I would move on. Even if she ever gets diagnosed and medicated, you are in for a lifetime of trouble. Relationships are hard enough when both parties are somewhere on the 'normal' range on the mental health scale, when you have someone who is so unreliable and your future is so uncertain - what is the point?


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## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

janefw said:


> What are the things that you do that rile her?


I don't really do anything. She says I'm a wonderful guy and the best boyfriend she's ever had. I think the biggest triggers are that as of late I have been so stressed out over finances that she says I never get really happy. She says my happiness is like a small wave that ripples on an ocean. 

Aside from that as I mentioned it's the lack of romance in the fashion that she thinks romance should be.

I pay for most of the food and bills and still somehow when I have paid things and run short on funds she gets mad and says that I'm not doing my job as the hunter/gatherer for this family. Then goes off and claims that she's paying for everything.


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## janefw (Jun 26, 2012)

Itchy said:


> I don't really do anything. She says I'm a wonderful guy and the best boyfriend she's ever had. I think the biggest triggers are that as of late I have been so stressed out over finances that she says I never get really happy. She says my happiness is like a small wave that ripples on an ocean.
> 
> Aside from that as I mentioned it's the lack of romance in the fashion that she thinks romance should be.
> 
> I pay for most of the food and bills and still somehow when I have paid things and run short on funds she gets mad and says that I'm not doing my job as the hunter/gatherer for this family. Then goes off and claims that she's paying for everything.


Run. Don't walk. Run. 

I hope that you have your financial affairs separate to hers, and you have no joint credit cards or anything like that.

She is selfish and immature.


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## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

janefw said:


> Seriously? I would move on. Even if she ever gets diagnosed and medicated, you are in for a lifetime of trouble. Relationships are hard enough when both parties are somewhere on the 'normal' range on the mental health scale, when you have someone who is so unreliable and your future is so uncertain - what is the point?


I'm hoping these hormone treatments will help balance her out some. The place that is specially making her's for her says she should have been on them since she had her hysterectomy. She's got a jackass doctor that won't call the place back and give them the ok though. 

There's more to it than just her and I. The kids. Their father is a deadbeat he won't even so much as pay his child support. They say that their mom has had so many boyfriend's in and out and I'm the first that has actually felt like a father to them.


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## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

janefw said:


> Run. Don't walk. Run.
> 
> I hope that you have your financial affairs separate to hers, and you have no joint credit cards or anything like that.
> 
> She is selfish and immature.


Oh yah. We have completely different bank accounts. That way all the money doesn't get spent and I can get the bills paid. I thought of having it all in one account before so I could keep an eye on it all but decided it would probably be a bad idea in the end.


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## janefw (Jun 26, 2012)

*sigh

I am sorry for the kids. I'm sure that they love you and you love them.

Are you prepared to put up with a lifetime of this for the sake of the kids?


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## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

Itchy said:


> I don't have any control over who she talks too. I've tried telling her before I'm uncomfortable with it and I do not want it happening. *She just says were not married and she will talk to whoever she wants too and that I do not own her.*



That's enough for me. Have a nice life baby, we're done!


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## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

janefw said:


> *sigh
> 
> I am sorry for the kids. I'm sure that they love you and you love them.
> 
> Are you prepared to put up with a lifetime of this for the sake of the kids?


Truthfully. I really want this to work out and I'm doing everything that I can in my power to sort it all out but no I won't do this forever. I was in a horrendous marriage prior to getting into this relationship that put me in a really bad place. If this relationship starts putting me in that place I will walk away.


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## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

anchorwatch said:


> That's enough for me. Have a nice life baby, we're done!


lol easier said than done. At least for me it is


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## janefw (Jun 26, 2012)

I do honor you for trying to figure it out, and for loving these kids, but it takes two to make a relationship or marriage. If she is not willing to work it out, it will fail in that you will be left 'carrying' the marriage. It's very hard to carry a marriage alone. Would she be willing to go into relationship counseling? Is she going to get the drugs you think she needs? Will she be willing to go to counseling on her own to get a real insight into her issues?

The way that I see it is that while you don't give her a reason to confront her issues, she will continue on in this manner, and it will hurt you, and it will also hurt her children. They are watching and listening and absorbing her behavior. I can't imagine that you would want her daughter to think it is okay to behave like this to her future partner, or for her son to think it is okay to stand by while his future partner acts like this? KWIM? The kids really are like little sponges - I have seen it in action. And often they will repeat the actions they have observed. That's why you want them to have healthy behaviors to repeat. 

I do think that you need to get some counseling yourself, so that you can get to a healthier place, and understand that there needs to be an ultimatum at some point, for the sake of yourself, and for the kids, and for your g/f.


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## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

Itchy said:


> Truthfully. I really want this to work out and I'm doing everything that I can in my power to sort it all out but no I won't do this forever. I was in a horrendous marriage prior to getting into this relationship that put me in a really bad place. If this relationship starts putting me in that place I will walk away.


The woman your living with is entertaining other men and she tells it's none of your business. She's your SO and she tells you you have to compete with them. 

How much does it take to put you in a bad place? 

Are you a doormat or cuckold? I wouldn't think so, but you're acting like it. You're a "Nice Guy" without enough boundaries and they finish last.


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## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

PBear said:


> Why are you in this relationship? There's a sea of red flags from infidelity to financial irresponsibility, none of which bode well for a happy long term relationship. Are you thinking you can "fix" her? Good luck with that? Are you thinking she'll change if you marry her? She most likely will, but not for the better.
> 
> Personally, rather than investing time in your relationship with her, I'd recommend spending your time and effort in understanding your desire to stay in such an unhealthy relationship so you can prevent it from happening again. But that's just my thoughts, based in your posts...
> 
> ...


Sorry didn't see your post earlier. No while it seems like there is a lot of bad there is a lot of good that overshadows it as well. I think that's one of the things we forget when we come for advice. At that moment in time the problem far outweighs the good that is there. 

You are right though. I have a problem myself in that I have a "caretaker" personality. It's something I have been struggling with for a long time to correct.


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## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

janefw said:


> I do honor you for trying to figure it out, and for loving these kids, but it takes two to make a relationship or marriage. If she is not willing to work it out, it will fail in that you will be left 'carrying' the marriage. It's very hard to carry a marriage alone. Would she be willing to go into relationship counseling? Is she going to get the drugs you think she needs? Will she be willing to go to counseling on her own to get a real insight into her issues?
> 
> The way that I see it is that while you don't give her a reason to confront her issues, she will continue on in this manner, and it will hurt you, and it will also hurt her children. They are watching and listening and absorbing her behavior. I can't imagine that you would want her daughter to think it is okay to behave like this to her future partner, or for her son to think it is okay to stand by while his future partner acts like this? KWIM? The kids really are like little sponges - I have seen it in action. And often they will repeat the actions they have observed. That's why you want them to have healthy behaviors to repeat.
> 
> I do think that you need to get some counseling yourself, so that you can get to a healthier place, and understand that there needs to be an ultimatum at some point, for the sake of yourself, and for the kids, and for your g/f.


The hormone medicine is something she is for sure getting. The place that is making it has it all ready the hold up is her doctor. They just need him to give the ok on it all and he thus far is not returning their calls. I know because I the place has called me about it and I have called him about it multiple times. 

She will not go into any kind of counseling though. I have thought of that before. She feels counselors are idiots who will not have an unbiased opinion. She argues that women naturally tend to side with their own gender and vice versa. If it's someone who has been scorned in a bad relationship previously they are going to side with the person on the receiving end simply because they are sympathetic to that person.

The girls and I have had many conversations about this. They will address the way their mom acts towards me and the way she acts towards them. I will listen to what they have to say but by no means will I ever side against my girlfriend. I respect what they have to say and what they are seeing but I can't put their mother into a negative light where they are concerned. They won't bring any of it up to her though. They bring it to me and will bring it up to their grandmother who has equally as many issues.


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## janefw (Jun 26, 2012)

Itchy said:


> The girls and I have had many conversations about this. They will address the way their mom acts towards me and the way she acts towards them. I will listen to what they have to say but by no means will I ever side against my girlfriend. I respect what they have to say and what they are seeing but I can't put their mother into a negative light where they are concerned.


I have some doubts about this. They do need to know that her behavior is not normal, and not healthy. They need to hear that - especially if their grandmother behaves in a similar way. If you want them to grow up different to these two women, they should know that there is an alternative behavior.

I hope that if she ever behaves in a manner which endangers them, you will take their side against her.


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## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

anchorwatch said:


> The woman your living with is entertaining other men and she tells it's none of your business. She's your SO and she tells you you have to compete with them.
> 
> How much does it take to put you in a bad place?
> 
> Are you a doormat or cuckold? I wouldn't think so, but you're acting like it. You're a "Nice Guy" without enough boundaries and they finish last.


I am a nice guy. I'm way too nice. I didn't used to be like this is the funny thing. It's only been over the course of the last year when I started staying really stressed out. I was never mean by any means but no one was able to walk on me either. 

Her thought process on all of that is that she needs to feel desired and wanted and as long as she's not doing anything too risque it's ok. We have had many talks about this. She says normally guys will make an ultimatum and she will not listen because she will not choose a man over her friends. Which I have reasoned these people that in reality just want to have sex with her are not friends at all. She ha a hard time figuring that out because she loves attention. She's been a ballet/belly dance performer since she was 6 years old and used to having sexual attention.


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## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

janefw said:


> I have some doubts about this. They do need to know that her behavior is not normal, and not healthy. They need to hear that - especially if their grandmother behaves in a similar way. If you want them to grow up different to these two women, they should know that there is an alternative behavior.
> 
> I hope that if she ever behaves in a manner which endangers them, you will take their side against her.


That's one area where my train of thought has worked out. They do realize it's not fair to me or to them. Back when things got really bad between us the oldest (14) even asked me why I stay with her mother. That one was a bit of a shock to hear. 

They like me are really hoping these hormone treatments will do her some good. They really want us to get married and have me adopt them as my own.


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## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

*Re: Re: Girlfriend keeps disconnecting from me*



Itchy said:


> I am a nice guy. I'm way too nice. I didn't used to be like this is the funny thing. It's only been over the course of the last year when I started staying really stressed out. I was never mean by any means but no one was able to walk on me either.
> 
> Her thought process on all of that is that she needs to feel desired and wanted and as long as she's not doing anything too risque it's ok. We have had many talks about this. She says normally guys will make an ultimatum and she will not listen because she will not choose a man over her friends. Which I have reasoned these people that in reality just want to have sex with her are not friends at all. She ha a hard time figuring that out because she loves attention. She's been a ballet/belly dance performer since she was 6 years old and used to having sexual attention.


She has less boundries than you. This is not going to end well.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

Itchy said:


> Sorry didn't see your post earlier. No while it seems like there is a lot of bad there is a lot of good that overshadows it as well. I think that's one of the things we forget when we come for advice. At that moment in time the problem far outweighs the good that is there.
> 
> You are right though. I have a problem myself in that I have a "caretaker" personality. It's something I have been struggling with for a long time to correct.


You've asked for advice in here, and you're getting a pretty consistent message. You can choose to accept it or not. But if you stay in this relationship, I'll bet dollars to donuts that you're in for a lifetime of frustration and pain, most likely culminating with her cheating on you when one of the guys she's fooling around with finally hitting the right buttons at the right time. 

All I can suggest is that if you choose to continue this relationship, you bookmark this site. I suspect you'll be back sooner rather than later. 

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

Take a look at this book and site. Take the quiz, see where you stand. Maybe you can find something to help yourself set some personal boundaries. Things will be a whole lot better for everyone when you do.

No More Mr. Nice Guy


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## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

anchorwatch said:


> She has less boundries than you. This is not going to end well.


Thing is I don't really know what to do about it. To get her to understand how it all affects me,you know?


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## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

You can't get her or anyone else to do anything. 

You can decide to set your personal boundaries, as to how you will be treated and respected, for who you are and what you give to a relationship. She then will decide if she can respect them or not. 

I suspect you weren't respected in your previous relationship.


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## janefw (Jun 26, 2012)

anchorwatch said:


> You can't get her or anyone else to do anything.
> 
> You can decide to set your personal boundaries, as to how you will be treated and respected, for who you are and what you give to a relationship. She then will decide if she can respect them or not.
> 
> I suspect you weren't respected in your previous relationship.


:iagree:


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## Emerald (Aug 2, 2012)

Itchy said:


> They say that their mom has had so many boyfriend's in and out and I'm the first that has actually felt like a father to them.


Let me guess OP - when you met your wife she was VERY charming & sexual - sometimes hypersexual?

Only a professional can dx, but I think your wife is bipolar or BPD. You say some of her family members are BPD. Bipolar runs rampant in families; not sure about BPD.

Overspending (her entire paycheck each weekend) is a symptom of bipolar during the manic phase.

"So many boyfriends" as mentioned by you above - another possible bipolar symptom during the manic phase.

You also mention that she refuses to seek professional help.

You say she depends on you to "feed the family." She also treats you horribly often & can have EA's with other men "because you don't control her."

I mean no disrespect OP, but this relationship is 50 Shades of Crazy.

My advice is to cut your losses after 3 years & move on before the stress of living with her kills you.


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## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

anchorwatch said:


> Take a look at this book and site. Take the quiz, see where you stand. Maybe you can find something to help yourself set some personal boundaries. Things will be a whole lot better for everyone when you do.
> 
> No More Mr. Nice Guy


I scored 
_71 – 88: You could be a poster child for the Nice Guy syndrome!_

Going to read over the site some and see what it says


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## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

PBear said:


> You've asked for advice in here, and you're getting a pretty consistent message. You can choose to accept it or not. But if you stay in this relationship, I'll bet dollars to donuts that you're in for a lifetime of frustration and pain, most likely culminating with her cheating on you when one of the guys she's fooling around with finally hitting the right buttons at the right time.
> 
> All I can suggest is that if you choose to continue this relationship, you bookmark this site. I suspect you'll be back sooner rather than later.
> 
> ...


Your absolutely right and I greatly appreciate all the advice and such I'm getting here. Please don't get me wrong about that


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## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

anchorwatch said:


> You can't get her or anyone else to do anything.
> 
> You can decide to set your personal boundaries, as to how you will be treated and respected, for who you are and what you give to a relationship. She then will decide if she can respect them or not.
> 
> I suspect you weren't respected in your previous relationship.


My ex wife cheated on me but yes she did not respect me. With her the very first time it happened she was out the door. The cars were in my name. I took her's from her sold it outright. She had to go with her brother and I filed for divorce within a month of separation. To this day she will occasionally message me on facebook (she is not on my friend's list obviously) and say that she regrets it all.


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## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

Emerald said:


> Let me guess OP - when you met your wife she was VERY charming & sexual - sometimes hypersexual?
> 
> Only a professional can dx, but I think your wife is bipolar or BPD. You say some of her family members are BPD. Bipolar runs rampant in families; not sure about BPD.
> 
> ...


She was. It was sex all the time. Anytime during the day we had a free moment. She was absolutely charming. Everything about her radiated positivity and confidence in herself.

She's had a lot of boyfriends since her divorce. A lot of her boyfriend's were friend's that they mutually decided to try dating and obviously they didn't pan out very well. Some of them are still friend's with her. A couple although they were many years back have never dated again since because they are still hung up on her. Plus a lot of her ex boyfriends have been addicted to drugs and whatnot.

I agree it is crazy. My problem is I can't seem to walk away without knowing I did everything I could to save it. In the back of my head I know that is crazy as well because I know I have done everything I can possibly do. I think it's part fear and part dedication. I dunno.


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## Itchy (Jan 22, 2013)

So me and my girlfriend were talking last night. She brought it up not me. She said her problem in relationships is she gets bored. She gets scared of stagnation. She said she finds it attractive when people are unavailable. Like married men for example. She said she doesn't want to sleep with them she just likes knowing that they want and desire her.

Her doctor finally called the hormone clinic back and denied treatment and gave no reason why. I suggested she see a different doctor. My girlfriend has a ton of medical problems and outside of something like the flu he can't diagnose anything wrong with her. 

I hate to admit defeat but I guess at this point the only thing I can do is start saving up for my own place and end it like you all have suggested. The thought really causes me a lot of pain. I don't know have any friends that I can stay with they all have roommates or live in girlfriends and my family lives in a totally different state than I.


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