# Feeling so sad and alone.



## ladyavon (Oct 10, 2011)

Hello I am seriously considering leaving my husband. He does not abuse me, he says he loves me but... he spends all of his time talking to strangers on a philosophy forum/chat/message board. He goes to the computer when he gets up, stays there until he has to go to work and then goes right back there when he gets home, sometimes he doesn't even take time to eat. We are empty nesters, so it's just me and him now. (I have daughters 18 and 22). I am so lonely. I have tried to talk to him about it. We actually did break up (for two weeks) last year due to the same type of thing. I tell him I am so lonely and he says "I'm right here". If he does step away from the computer, he then talks non-stop about philosophy or some similar topic and expects me to listen, sometimes for hours. I just can't listen anymore. I am so angry. I feel like he has abandoned me. He does not care about anything I might tell him to do with "real" life issues. He tells me to "make a plan" Well I want him to make it with me. I want a husband, a partner. Our sex life is suffering (we have previously had some great sex), he says I never want it, well, I don't, until I get desperate, I am not interested in having sex with someone who does not care about my feelings. That is not a turn on. I know I would be sad without him, I love him. But I am so so so angry! Now we have started fighting, bad arguments, yelling, swearing, and I have said some hurtful things to him. I just don't know what to do. He will not go to counselling, I have tried to get him to go... so I guess I will just have to leave because I cannot continue being so angry and hurt every day. I am so sad. There seems to be no way to reach him.

I am mostly afraid that if I don't leave I will have an affair. It is so tempting and so easy - I have already been talking on POF because I am so lonely. I want my husband. I want my marriage. What can I possibly do? It seams hopeless.


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## YinPrincess (Jul 31, 2011)

I am so sorry. I know exactly how you feel
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## YinPrincess (Jul 31, 2011)

Whoops! I meant to write more before sending! I would encourage you to go to individual counseling for yourself. It will help you to talk and receive validation. You can also learn things you can do for yourself, such as setting boundaries. I know how you feel, and I know how frustrating it is to feel stuck.  I wish you the best.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## mommyoftwo85 (Sep 23, 2011)

I know how you feel. My husband is currently working out of state and has been for 4 months now. When he first went out of state he would call me all the time and spend hours on the phone with me. The situation has changed so much now. I am lucky if I get 5 mins of his time through out the day. I have tried talking to him and explaining how this makes me feel and he gets mad and will not talk to me for days on end. This really has me feeling lonely and un loved. I am not asking for hours on the phone but atleast 30 mins just to talk about our day. I am currently 3 weeks from having our second daughter and he has now resorted to not speaking to me because I ask for more time. Really being punished by not talking to me because I want more of his time.


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