# Emotional and Verbal Abuse



## SoCalKat (Mar 2, 2011)

Well, after she initiated the separation last year and then tortured me, I moved on months ago. After I stopped chasing her and trying to get her to work on things, I worked on myself, reconnected with my family and really took the time to evaluate my role in the marriage.

After a lot of research and discussions with friends & family that knew us together, I came to the conclusion that I've been verbally and emotionally abused by this angry, controlling woman for the duration of our marriage. She even continued it during the separation. I guess for men it's really hard to accept this. We've been living in the house, but separate. I did it because money is tight and I didn't want to leave my children.

In spite of all this, I filed for a No-Fault Divorce a couple of weeks ago and started a draft settlement agreement. I really just want to be done with her and her abuse and get on with my life. I'm really afraid she's going to make this difficult for me, as is her nature. Unfortunately, my finances being what they are, I can't afford an attorney. 

If she tries to make this hard, how can bring in the emotional and verbal abuse into the negotiations or in court? I have a notebook of some e-mails and wrote down lots of examples of her abuse, but unfortunately, a lot of it was spoken and not witnessed by anybody, so it's somewhat "off the record."


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## Shooboomafoo (Mar 30, 2011)

The courts here in TX, even after initial filing, require that the divorcing parents work out their negotiations thru a mediator.
Whether you have a lawyer or not, you will be seeing a mediator, as a court is not going to immediately start a jury-trial of the ends and means of the divorce.
Just focus for now, on what the agreement should be at the no-fault basis, and dont let yourself worry about what she might do.
If you need help, find a mediator yourself, set up an appointment, and you can then get a feel for where your stbxw is planning to go. A lot of the time, the mediator can put the kabosh on any bullsh!t.


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