# Are you married and still have to use Condoms?!



## qdobajoe (Jun 14, 2009)

How many of you (guys) out there are married and still are having to use condoms as Birth control. My wife and I have been married for about 4 months now and every time we have sex I still have to use condoms. I hate wearing condoms. I have begged my wife to find another form of birth control but she complains that she gets some type of "infection" from using birth control pills. So for the ladies out there (and I guess guys as well)....any suggestions as to what type of birth control to use besides the ole' condom?!


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## Deb1234 (May 31, 2009)

Or get her pregnant...no need for condoms then! :smthumbup:


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## revitalizedhusband (Feb 9, 2009)

I have to "one up" you.

My wife is "fixed", so pregnancy is not even a possibility. 

However, just about 8 months ago my wife started having throbbing pains/burning "down there" after sex. Now we've been married 9.5 years and this was brand new. She, over time, has developed a weird allergic reaction to my cum (confirmed by doctor).

On top of that, she gets severly irritated with latex, so condoms are out.

So, for the last 8 months its sex and then the "pull out" method of "birth control". I have been married for nearly 10 years now, have 3 kids, and all of the sudden when we are done having kids, can't ever "finish" in my wife again. 

So, all I'm saying is...it could be worse?


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## michzz (Jun 6, 2008)

revitalizedhusband said:


> However, just about 8 months ago my wife started having throbbing pains/burning "down there" after sex. Now we've been married 9.5 years and this was brand new. She, over time, has developed a weird allergic reaction to my cum (*confirmed by doctor*).


Not to be a cynic, but did you get this confirmation directly from the doctor or is this what your wife told you?


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## hubby (Aug 10, 2009)

Funny this topic comes up now. We still use the condom but yesturday was the first time in years that I took it off and finshed outside (no pill, etc). It was just after her period so we are OK. I have mentioned it a few times that we should look into alternatives. She was just at her OBGYN last week and they discussed it. They think she may be alergic to progestrone so that limits the options. She is really worried about all the potential side effects (bleeding, lower libido, weight gain, etc) so I don't think we will get there until I go under the knife. Oh well, yestuday just reminds me how good and intimate it feels to not have a piece of latex between us.


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## revitalizedhusband (Feb 9, 2009)

michzz said:


> Not to be a cynic, but did you get this confirmation directly from the doctor or is this what your wife told you?


From the doctor, I was in the room because they had to test "my stuff" and her reaction to it.

If you are that "interested" read this, the symptoms describe my wife EXACTLY.

http://www.essortment.com/articles/semen_allergy_100017.htm


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## somethingtotalkabout (Oct 15, 2009)

NuvaRing worked well for me and my husband...however, he sometimes uses condoms as well. We have been married for about six months now. I had problems with other forms of birth control, such as migraines and mild infections.


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## sjm1983 (Sep 18, 2009)

My wife and I had very good success with a foam spermicide. Its not quite as good a condom but you risk getting pregnant if you have sex at all. No birth control is 100%. 

I guess to some degree you have to know how big of a risk you are willing to take.


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## MEM2020 (Aug 23, 2009)

My wife got fitted for a diaphragm. It worked great. 

I HATE condoms. After we had our 3rd child - which was planned - I got the big V.




qdobajoe said:


> How many of you (guys) out there are married and still are having to use condoms as Birth control. My wife and I have been married for about 4 months now and every time we have sex I still have to use condoms. I hate wearing condoms. I have begged my wife to find another form of birth control but she complains that she gets some type of "infection" from using birth control pills. So for the ladies out there (and I guess guys as well)....any suggestions as to what type of birth control to use besides the ole' condom?!


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## DownButNotOut (Apr 9, 2009)

sjm1983 said:


> My wife and I had very good success with a foam spermicide. Its not quite as good a condom but you risk getting pregnant if you have sex at all. No birth control is 100%.
> 
> I guess to some degree you have to know how big of a risk you are willing to take.


My 4th child was a result of this contraceptive's failure.


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

We used condoms for 20 years, with only 3 short breaks... Guess how many kids we have  

I did not realise how much sensation I was missing out on until we stopped 2 years ago. I'm not sure if the woman is as affected by condoms as much as the man... just thinking of the mechanics of it.

We stopped using condoms after I started semen retention. I have no idea if we are playing with fire. There are supposed to be sperm in pre-cum, and we are often at it for an hour at a time. But perhaps the fact she is 47 is helping.

I'm not recommending this as a contraceptive method AT ALL. Just giving my experience. If you don't want kids at all, don't have sex.


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## MMA_FIGHTER (Feb 2, 2009)

i dont use condoms with my wife at all, i have a 7 year old son and that it.......yaaaay meeee


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## sarah.rslp (Jan 2, 2009)

I don't see the point in condoms if you're in a steady relationshp... I always relied on condom mainly as a means of preventing STD's not birth control...

In the past I usually sack condoms once I'm in a steady relationshp for a month or so and I've got some confidence in the guy... One thing I might suggest is to be absolutly clear about where you intend to finish during sex.. I hate guys finishing inside me and I know I'm not alone in that ... so maybe a possible issue?


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## MMA_FIGHTER (Feb 2, 2009)

do you mean finishing inside you with a condom on or off, and if its off, why would a girl not want someone to do that besides the obvious...does it not feel good or something, if its with the condom on i can understand caus it could break and you could get pregnant. just curious....


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## mdinwpg (Aug 8, 2009)

My wife's on the pill but still insists on using a condom as a "backup". I'm not a fan and even suggested I get a vasectomy (We don't want ANY kids) but even then she says we'd still need a condom since that's not 100%, she "read somewhere" about that failing as well so obviously that wouldn't be worth the effort lol


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## ChimeIn (Oct 10, 2009)

If she has problems with infections, you can try lambskin condoms. They are supposed to be a lot thinner and give the guy a lot more sensation... but they don't protect against STD's, just pregnancy. 

My husband tried them (when we were trying out various birth control methods) but said they felt about the same as latex to him. Every guy feels differently.


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

mdinwpg said:


> My wife's on the pill but still insists on using a condom as a "backup". I'm not a fan and even suggested I get a vasectomy (We don't want ANY kids) but even then she says we'd still need a condom since that's not 100%, she "read somewhere" about that failing as well so obviously that wouldn't be worth the effort lol


Your wife might be borderline OCD. Like me, lol 

Some of the best people are, but you would do well to read up on it. OCD is made worse by lowered serotonin levels. Conversely higher serotonin makes the symptoms ease off. For me, lots and lots of sex makes me feel almost normal.


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## humpty dumpty (Nov 26, 2008)

semen retention great for more sex not great for birth control  
have you thought about using a iud easily removed when you deside to have children.

failing that there are plenty of other forms of birth control if you really dont like using comdoms then talk to her about finding something you are both happy with  good luck


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## revitalizedhusband (Feb 9, 2009)

A vasectomy is just as reliable as a condom, why is she ok with a condom but not a vasectomy?


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## humpty dumpty (Nov 26, 2008)

pretty perminate having a vasectomy ok if you have had children and want no more but for early married life probably not the best form off control


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## mdinwpg (Aug 8, 2009)

revitalizedhusband said:


> A vasectomy is just as reliable as a condom, why is she ok with a condom but not a vasectomy?


No idea. She claims it's not 100%, I think she read somewhere on the Internet that it wasn't and now her mind is set. She's also mentioned that she needs to physically feel a barrier to feel ok with it.


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## revitalizedhusband (Feb 9, 2009)

What about a diaphram then? She's feel that barrier.


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## American Arrogance (Sep 5, 2008)

Before I got my tubes tied I was using the gel contraceptive...you can buy at any drugstore over the counter. It comes in a blue box however, you can perfrom oral sex after it in....lol

I didnt like the pill becuase the pill decreased my sexual desires for years and I would only get horny during the menses. During our first 3 years of marriage we was doing the pull out method...needless to that didnt work much becuase I didnt like him pulling out!

Now life is better with the essure procedure.


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## CaliRN (Jan 2, 2010)

married and still using condoms, that sucks in a bad way lol !


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## larniegrl (Oct 7, 2009)

Use a diaphragm...it is very effective and can stay in for up to 4 hrs.


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## CaliRN (Jan 2, 2010)

there's alot of different birth control out there, if she insist for condoms, have her put on the female ones lol


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## MEM2020 (Aug 23, 2009)

Diaphragm worked really really well for us - no accidents in 13 years of use. After last child was born I got a vasectomy.




qdobajoe said:


> How many of you (guys) out there are married and still are having to use condoms as Birth control. My wife and I have been married for about 4 months now and every time we have sex I still have to use condoms. I hate wearing condoms. I have begged my wife to find another form of birth control but she complains that she gets some type of "infection" from using birth control pills. So for the ladies out there (and I guess guys as well)....any suggestions as to what type of birth control to use besides the ole' condom?!


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## Alexandra (Jan 9, 2010)

Lots of other options. Have your wife visit the GP to discuss them.

There's a lot of different types of BC pills out there, maybe she reacted to one, but can find another one that works for her. Then there's IUD, female condoms, diapragms, etc.

Withdrawl and rhthym methods are also available, although not especially reliable. And what about getting her pregnant, did you respond to that one ???


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## Hurra (Sep 13, 2009)

My wife and I after 3-4 years married still use a condom. I really want to get rid of it. I feel like we're teens dating or something. I know she would be totally opposed to it for 100 reasons. I think the fact she doesn't want to get rid of it sends a message, multiple messages, including how she feels about sex, about me, about the male organ and what it generates.

Right now we are not in a position to start a family but there has to be alternatives to the condom that will give us equal birth control.


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## Rob2380 (Dec 21, 2009)

When we were married I used condoms for several years as my wife had problems with birth control pills (excessive bleeding as I recall). We kept thinking we'd have another child at some point, but that day never came, so one day we talked about vasectomy. Best thing I ever did. Funny, I don't miss the condoms one bit. :smthumbup:


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## bacala787 (Feb 7, 2010)

withdrawal / oral / anal / a pearl necklace is a nice gift


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## beccablue (Nov 2, 2010)

i need help with this . i have been with my husband for almost 10 years , married for 3 of those years . the entire time i have been with chris we haved used condoms . i so sick of using them its to the point when we use them i get sore and painful like im getting allergic to them , know i want a baby so bad that i dont want to use them any more and he insist that we keep useing them .. WHAT TO DO . IT GETTING TO THE POINT WHERE WE HAVE ARGUMENTS OVER SEX AND CONDOMS , CAUSE HE NOT READY BUT WHEN WE ARE AROUND ALL HIS FRIENDS THAT HAVE CHILDREN HE PLAYING WITH THEM IT REALLY MAKES ME MAD I NEED SOME ADVICE


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## jack ttr (Sep 14, 2015)

my wife and I been married for 20 years, she has been threw change of life 6 years ago. She suffered a massive heart attack 3 years ago, since then she has lost allot of weight which is great, but sex is now painful for her. Due to several medicines she takes will interfere with taking estrogine.its seams to help if I start out with a condom at first,why?.


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