# What the hell?



## KatiezMomma (Nov 17, 2011)

I am hoping you guys might have any idea what the hell is happening? Back story: seperating after 15 years, he's had a year long EA turned into a PA in November. Daughter and I are moving in February to our new place so in the mean time, we are still here. He goes to see the OW on the weekends only, FB and texts her continually (its bizarre actually). We have been distant since I found out, talk when we need to and he is sleeping on the couch. Christmas was painful, spent Eve together but we left on the day to spend the day with my family after we opened gifts at home (and surprise, no gift for me).

So he comes home tonight all excited, he went shopping for a new outfit for new year for his date with her. He says I got my gift, she is taking me to Vegas on the weekend you are moving, so I can't help you out. I was needless to say was a bit upset, mostly hurt and jealous. Seems kind of quick to be taking a trip together but thats just me. I left for a bit just to get some air but came back about an hour later with boxes to start packing. Ever since then, he was been super affectionate, almost bordering on sexual! What the hell? Guilt maybe?


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## tacoma (May 1, 2011)

Oh he`s definitely not feeling guilt.
You can`t live with your wife and child during the week, spend the weekends ****ing your mistress come home, tell your wife you`re going to Vegas with the mistress, and have a conscience.

He`s aiming for that last sex session.
You know, the hysterical bonding in vain?

Tell him to stay the hell off you and pray the time flies until you`re gone.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Why are you and your child moving out of the family home instead of him?


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

He feels no guilt which is why he's blatantly rubbing his affair in your face. File for divorce and never look back.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Crankshaw (Jan 12, 2011)

Jellybeans said:


> He feels no guilt which is why he's blatantly rubbing his affair in your face. File for divorce and never look back.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


still dishing out very sound advice JB


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Thanks, Crank. And we have missed you! Hope you are well!


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## KatiezMomma (Nov 17, 2011)

You guys are right, he is such a charmer that he could be telling you to **** off and you would think hey thats a great idea (I guess that what actually happening really  I spent the night stewing about it, not a great night sleep. I have no idea what I have done to deserve this garbage but not my concern anymore, its the OW. 

Elegirl, we are renting this place so it doesn't matter who leaves. Truthfully I jumped at the chance to leave here because I hate it.


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

Why are only separating and not divorcing him? If you divorce you'll be able to get court enforceable child support etc.

Right now he's a married man, openly cheating, and openly running off to vegas.

Also 50% of the money here is yours. guess what he'll be spending in vegas.


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## KatiezMomma (Nov 17, 2011)

In BC we have to be seperated a year before we can file for divorce but that will happen for sure. We have child and spousal agreement in our seperation papers that will be filed when we move.
As for the trip OW is paying for it, how sweet for him! And me I guess, but I did point out his first support payment is due the day he leaves . I also pointed out how messed up it is to be travelling with his new lady when he is still married, still living together regardless if he emotionally is done. He sat for a minute and didn't say anything. I just wish someone other than me would ask him what the **** he is doing because this is so out of character for him but he grew up with a family that condones just about anything so I think its a lost cause. Pity because I loved that man more than anything and would have done anything for him but it just doesn't matter.


Shaggy said:


> Why are only separating and not divorcing him? If you divorce you'll be able to get court enforceable child support etc.
> 
> Right now he's a married man, openly cheating, and openly running off to vegas.
> 
> Also 50% of the money here is yours. guess what he'll be spending in vegas.


_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## CH (May 18, 2010)

Take him to the cleaners IMO.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Jellybeans said:


> He feels no guilt which is why he's blatantly rubbing his affair in your face. File for divorce and never look back.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


:smthumbup::smthumbup::smthumbup::smthumbup:


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

And it's not out of character for him if he's doing it. This is his character now.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

KatiezMomma said:


> In BC we have to be seperated a year before we can file for divorce but that will happen for sure. We have child and spousal agreement in our seperation papers that will be filed when we move.
> As for the trip OW is paying for it, how sweet for him! And me I guess, but I did point out his first support payment is due the day he leaves . I also pointed out how messed up it is to be travelling with his new lady when he is still married, still living together regardless if he emotionally is done. He sat for a minute and didn't say anything. I just wish someone other than me would ask him what the **** he is doing because this is so out of character for him but he grew up with a family that condones just about anything so I think its a lost cause. Pity because I loved that man more than anything and would have done anything for him but it just doesn't matter.
> 
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


You should check with a lawyer, but I believe here in Canada the one year waiting period can be avoided in cases where adultery is an issue.

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## KatiezMomma (Nov 17, 2011)

I did talk to a lawyer and trying to get the evidence is going to next to impossible since he chats on his work cellphone and he won't admit to it in writing....actually I never asked him! Hmmmm. There is a conversation to have tonight. I just wish this was so easy for me as it is for him. Sadly I am so worried for him, this new relationship seems so....bizarre but I guess it would from any spouses view.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

KatiezMomma said:


> I did talk to a lawyer and trying to get the evidence is going to next to impossible since he chats on his work cellphone and he won't admit to it in writing....actually I never asked him! Hmmmm. There is a conversation to have tonight. I just wish this was so easy for me as it is for him. Sadly I am so worried for him, this new relationship seems so....bizarre but I guess it would from any spouses view.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


The courts aren't naive. Him going out like he does, and then going to vegas with her is pretty clear cut I'd say.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Most states are no-fault so it won't matter whether he has cheated or not (which he has).

File for divorcea nd child support/custody and spousal support if you are entitled to it.

Be done with him. He's been gone for a long time from your marriage. He's dead weight so cut him loose and start living. 

You deserve better.


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## KatiezMomma (Nov 17, 2011)

I'm sure you are all right, he is an ******* but I am in the real lame oh wo is me, he is the best I will ever meet, I love him so much and I must have deserved this yuck cycle. I can't stand being around myself right now, I hate it. I am sure this will all be different when I get the hell out of here and into our own place so I don't have to be around it anymore. Him leaving for Vegas is going to be hard though, we had planned on doing that but never seemed to get around to it.... See!! I am getting into that mood as I type this........I need a stiff drink!


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