# HELP!!!! "O" happens to quickly since getting of psych meds



## Big Mama (Mar 24, 2014)

Well I think the title says it all. I have been off my meds for about 4 months now. I am not sure this is a change I will keep. Here is the issue. I cum so quickly. There is almost no moving threw the stages leading up to "O". It all seems to go so quickly. Then the "O" sucks. I would have rather not even bothered wasting my time. 

When I was on psych meds, it took huge efforts to cum. I mean vibe on super high for pretty long periods of time. I went threw all teh phases and build up and finally with much work "O." 

Now it seems I can't even delay or work threw things slowly. It is bam and I am left thinking WTF. 


*just as a side note, I am talking solo sex here. My H and I have been separated for almost a year. I have just returned this weekend, and we always laughed and called him the 60 sec man. When in all reality it was more like the 30 sec man. But who knows, sex with a real live person might be different. WE might be equally yoked, but I doubt it. 

Any suggestions on how to delay this. I was thinking about using some of that numbing "delay" stuff. I am open to suggestions.


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## Seppuku (Sep 22, 2010)

Stop using a vibrator? I have no idea.

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## Big Mama (Mar 24, 2014)

ok, so I have become vibe dependent. If I don't use it either the "O" totally sucks because it is so weak, or It just want happen. I guess I am so used to the buildup taking 30 min, that the "O" is quite powerful when it finally happens. After 8 years of being on psych meds I have finally figured out how hings work. and now things are different. With out the vibe, the "O" jsut dies usually. 

So I am stuck with Yes vibe and quick O that really sucks

OR 

No vibe, and more then likely it is nto going to happen or It will get almost there and stop. and if it does it will be very weak. I'd rather not bother. 

I thought getting off my meds would help my O issues. Seems like having the shoe on the other foot is no cake walk either. I am going to have to be in search of something slower and less powerful I suppose.


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## Fozzy (Jul 20, 2013)

Have you considered starting with no vibe and then bringing it in toward the end as a pinch hitter?


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## Seppuku (Sep 22, 2010)

Wean yourself off of it. It might take a long time to get used to not using it, just put in the work and keep trying. It's what we men have to do.

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## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

Put some lube on your fingers and rub your clit slowly. Watch some porn or listen to erotica on audio books if you want. Just rub slowly for awhile until you start feeling that build up. Stay with it slowly for awhile and keep building that feeling.

Your hand will take over and start rubbing more aggressively at some point.

If you don't make it to an O just stop for now and enjoy the pleasure you did have.

Keep doing this until you succeed and don't use a vibe at all until you do. You'll succeed eventually.


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## LucasJackson (May 26, 2016)

I'd like to comment and help but first I need to stop by the bathroom for 3-4 minutes....


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

Big Mama said:


> Any suggestions on how to delay this. I was thinking about using some of that numbing "delay" stuff. I am open to suggestions.


I would refrain from using any numbing creams in favor of just being patient and learning how to pleasure yourself more naturally which of course includes a simple vibrator for most women. 

1) In my opinion, this seems like an ideal time to perhaps explore a little with you vibrator. You may discover that you have other erogenous zones on your body that are rather underutilized, and that stimulating those may cause a slower buildup to a more pleasurable orgasm. 

2) Perhaps try placing a soft towel between you and the vibrator. Try folding the towel until you find a thickness or thinness that allows you to take more time with the vibrator. 

3) Also don't forget that women can be multi orgasmic! Just because you had one and fast, does not mean it is time to give up... take a small moment to relax and try for a second one. You may just find that having one very fast was just your body priming the pump for the real fun that will have you having orgasms that feel like nothing you have ever experienced before. 


Regards,
Badsanta


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## Big Mama (Mar 24, 2014)

Fozzy said:


> Have you considered starting with no vibe and then bringing it in toward the end as a pinch hitter?


Excellent idea. Practice makes perfect : ) I think I can actually do that.



Faithful Wife said:


> Put some lube on your fingers and rub your clit slowly. Watch some porn or listen to erotica on audio books if you want. Just rub slowly for awhile until you start feeling that build up. Stay with it slowly for awhile and keep building that feeling.
> 
> Your hand will take over and start rubbing more aggressively at some point.
> 
> ...


Thank you for the suggestion. I kinda spent a lot of years jstu trying to enjoy getting as close as I was gonna get, but I guess I got greedy, once you have it, I mean really have it, it is hard to go back to jsut enjoying what you are given.


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## Big Mama (Mar 24, 2014)

badsanta said:


> I would refrain from using any numbing creams in favor of just being patient and learning how to pleasure yourself more naturally which of course includes a simple vibrator for most women.
> 
> 1) In my opinion, this seems like an ideal time to perhaps explore a little with you vibrator. You may discover that you have other erogenous zones on your body that are rather underutilized, and that stimulating those may cause a slower buildup to a more pleasurable orgasm.
> 
> ...



Thank you for your wisdom. I always appreciate your input. 

I had not thought about multi orgasmic. That must be because that has never happened for me. I am no longer a spring chicken and things are a changin. That would we totally awesome. (I've heard) I have not been with my H or any man for that matter for a little over a year. I jsut returned home this weekend and I am sure there will come a point where sex is on his list of things to do. 

You other suggestions were helpful as well. Thank you for your insight.


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## Fozzy (Jul 20, 2013)

Big Mama said:


> Excellent idea. Practice makes perfect : ) I think I can actually do that.


I'm far from an expert, but it seems that what gives it that extra oomph is building levels of arousal. By building up to it manually for a while and then finishing with a vibe you'll stand a better chance of getting where you want to be.

From a male perspective, I can make myself go in pretty short order if that's what I wish. But drawing it out to get to a deeper level of arousal makes it more powerful. I'd imagine that it's similar from a female perspective.


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## heartbroken50 (Aug 9, 2016)

Big Mama said:


> Thank you for your wisdom. I always appreciate your input.
> 
> I had not thought about multi orgasmic. That must be because that has never happened for me. I am no longer a spring chicken and things are a changin. That would we totally awesome. (I've heard) I have not been with my H or any man for that matter for a little over a year. I jsut returned home this weekend and I am sure there will come a point where sex is on his list of things to do.
> 
> You other suggestions were helpful as well. Thank you for your insight.


I was going to suggest that... I often get my first O rather quickly, but 2nd and 3rd have a much slower build up and are much more powerful.


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

How long have you been off your meds and how long had you been on them?

Psychotropics alter your brain chemistry to artificially level your mood/behavior. Moods/behaviors are prompted by, happen in concert with neuro chemicals. It is those hormones that allow you to have a racing heart, increased respirations, increased sensitivity to tactile and olfactory senses, and even sight via pupil dialtion and contraction. Whether you're on a roller coaster, running for your life, or in the throes of the best orgasm you've ever had, none of those physiological responses to stimuli would be possible without the spikes and increases in adrenaline, endorphins, serotonin, and cortisol. 

Now that you've gone off your meds your previously artificially dampened neuro chemical fluctuations are free to fly to the moon baby! 

Give it time and your brain and body will adjust back to what might be closer to normal, so long as everything else remains stable.

And ditch the vibrator.


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## WorkingWife (May 15, 2015)

Big Mama said:


> Thank you for your wisdom. I always appreciate your input.
> 
> I had not thought about multi orgasmic. That must be because that has never happened for me. I am no longer a spring chicken and things are a changin. That would we totally awesome. (I've heard) I have not been with my H or any man for that matter for a little over a year. I jsut returned home this weekend and I am sure there will come a point where sex is on his list of things to do.
> 
> You other suggestions were helpful as well. Thank you for your insight.


You should definitely go for more. I take forever to O, but once I do it, I can keep doing it (with a vibrator) until I get bored. (Which is probably 15 to 30 times...)

Personally, the manual thing has never worked for me. I'd get carpal tunnel before I'd come. BUT I urge you to try a gentle stream of water... laying on your back in the bath tub under the water (if you're not in a drought area, of course). THAT "builds up" for me much better than a vibrator and since it's less intense stimulation, the actual orgasm is longer, more intense, and relaxed. If that's not practical, get a shower massager with a long hose and play with that on different settings. Try to stick to the more gentle settings - sounds like that's all you need now anyhow.

Other than that, all I can say is - I envy you!


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## Big Mama (Mar 24, 2014)

Fozzy said:


> I'm far from an expert, but it seems that what gives it that extra oomph is building levels of arousal. By building up to it manually for a while and then finishing with a vibe you'll stand a better chance of getting where you want to be.
> 
> From a male perspective, I can make myself go in pretty short order if that's what I wish. But drawing it out to get to a deeper level of arousal makes it more powerful. I'd imagine that it's similar from a female perspective.


Thank you for taking the time to respond. I used to be able to choose how long I wanted ti to last. But now that I am off my meds, I guess that is the issue, IDK, I don;t have that luxury. IF I drag it out then often it fades. I guess it would be comparable to a man going soft halfway threw the encounter. Totally sucks. 

I'm sure I will figure this out. Like I said I was on meds for 8 years, and have only been off of it 4 months. So I have not had much time for practice, though I have practiced some. It's just not what anticipated.


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## Big Mama (Mar 24, 2014)

heartbroken50 said:


> I was going to suggest that... I often get my first O rather quickly, but 2nd and 3rd have a much slower build up and are much more powerful.


I have not even attempted that. Definitely worth a try.


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## Big Mama (Mar 24, 2014)

WorkingWife said:


> You should definitely go for more. I take forever to O, but once I do it, I can keep doing it (with a vibrator) until I get bored. (Which is probably 15 to 30 times...)
> 
> Personally, the manual thing has never worked for me. I'd get carpal tunnel before I'd come. BUT I urge you to try a gentle stream of water... laying on your back in the bath tub under the water (if you're not in a drought area, of course). THAT "builds up" for me much better than a vibrator and since it's less intense stimulation, the actual orgasm is longer, more intense, and relaxed. If that's not practical, get a shower massager with a long hose and play with that on different settings. Try to stick to the more gentle settings - sounds like that's all you need now anyhow.
> 
> Other than that, all I can say is - I envy you!


Thank you for your suggestion. The manual thing just doesn't do that great for me either. I'm with ya there. The water thing sounds interesting. Positioning could be awkward. But if it is worth it, then hey who cares. Guess it would be wise to warn users of this method not to put the drain plug in. That could potentially give whole new meaning to "drowinging in orgasam."


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## peacem (Oct 25, 2014)

Hi

I think your body will slowly adjust to being off the meds and your orgasms will become 'normal' again. Just wait it out. In the mean time go for the multiples, get a vibe with different settings and pulsations and experiment on lower settings, perhaps not even directly on your clitoris but just slightly off centre. I personally wouldn't ditch the vibrator if it is a sensation that you like.


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## Big Mama (Mar 24, 2014)

Well I had lots of fun trying some of these things. I jsut wanted to give yall an update. I had to go back on my anti depressants. The issues mentioned here will no longer be an issue. I am back on my sex drive killing medicine. But like I said thank you for all your feedback.


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## wantshelp (Mar 10, 2016)

What psych meds are we talking about here? An SSRI? Did you get back on for your mental health or to restore your orgasm? And, if everything goes back to the way it was, please let us know. That would be very interesting.


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## Big Mama (Mar 24, 2014)

I was taking Zoloft. I quit taking it a while back with the help of my Dr and T. I have been off of them for 4 months. During that time Orgasms were different and to easily triggered and sucked at that. I was used to the time and difficult that was needed to have on "O" while on meds. That was not the case any more, when I wrote this tread. But I had a lapse and had to go back on the meds. Back on Zoloft. So now I am pretty sure my sex drive will be gone and the lady bits will once again be come numb and orgasm will take lots of stimulation.


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## peacem (Oct 25, 2014)

Big Mama said:


> I was taking Zoloft. I quit taking it a while back with the help of my Dr and T. I have been off of them for 4 months. During that time Orgasms were different and to easily triggered and sucked at that. I was used to the time and difficult that was needed to have on "O" while on meds. That was not the case any more, when I wrote this tread. But I had a lapse and had to go back on the meds. Back on Zoloft. So now I am pretty sure my sex drive will be gone and the lady bits will once again be come numb and orgasm will take lots of stimulation.


Have you tried a body wand? I don't even need mental stimulation with those.


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