# What else can I do to make my husband want sex again?



## Josselyn (Sep 10, 2012)

I had gained a little weight and our sex life slowed down. My husband said parts of my body were not attractive to him anymore (even though he recently lost 50lbs, he had been obese out entire relationship of 10yrs). I got upset of course and began to lose weight and he has been saying nice things like "you're looking so good lately" which is encouraging (I'm still mad about the way he handled it though and we are in counseling), but now we haven't had sex in weeks and I'm getting really frustrated. We've done some things like take quizzes on what we like about sex, I've bought lingerie, I've tried to get him in the mood, but he says he's tired (and he is stressed from work and works overtime and is taking classes online + we have a kid. I don't always come out and say "I want to have sex", but when I ask him about our lack of a sex life he says the above and we still don't have sex. The worst part is I asked him if he would be bothered if I got some toys and he seemed ok with this, instead of trying to solve the issue between him and I. Either way, just looking for suggestions because even though I am trying really hard to be patient, sex is very important to me in our relationship and I want it back, but if this is a permanent situation I will not live in a sexless marriage. So....Any suggestions are wanted. Anything I can do to spice it up, is it doomed beyond repair or should I just be patient with him?


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

He doesn't give you much to go on. I know when I'm tired, it's usually worse at night. You could try waking him up a little early for sex. Wake him up with some oral. Guys can't resist that. Also, if the tired thing is just an excuse, I would suspect that he may just be bored with the routine. Maybe introduce some new tricks. Finally, a huge problem with guys today is online porn use. It's hard to be horny if you're getting off with your iphone 3 times a day. I know this from personal experience. I also know from personal experience that stopping it is not easy. But it can be done.


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## Josselyn (Sep 10, 2012)

Thanks for the advice. It's nice to hear a perspective from a male about it.


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