# What books and other content have helped you as a woman.



## Lila (May 30, 2014)

I saw a similar thread on the men's lounge and thought it would be interesting to see what books or podcasts would be recommended by women for women. 

I highly recommend all women read The Subtle Art of Not Giving a **** by Mark Manson and Warrior Goddess Training by Heatherash Amara. These two books focus on self awareness and self acceptance. We don't have to be everything to everyone. We just need to be true to ourselves and reflect that truth with confidence to the outside world.


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

Why Men Love *****es
by Sherry Argon

Of course when I read it I realized I already do most of it 😁


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## Lila (May 30, 2014)

lifeistooshort said:


> Why Men Love *****es
> by Sherry Argon
> 
> Of course when I read it I realized I already do most of it 😁



I was going to post this one as well. 

I kind of cringed a little when I first read it while married. Now that I'm single, it all makes sense.


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

Lila said:


> I was going to post this one as well.
> 
> I kind of cringed a little when I first read it while married. Now that I'm single, it all makes sense.


The title isn't meant to be taken literally....it doesn't actually say one should be a *****.

It talks about how to appeal to the part of men that likes to chase and it gives tips to present yourself as a woman of value that is worth a lot of effort.

Nowhere does it ever say to be nasty.


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## Lila (May 30, 2014)

lifeistooshort said:


> The title isn't meant to be taken literally....it doesn't actually say one should be a ***.
> 
> It talks about how to appeal to the part of men that likes to chase and it gives tips to present yourself as a woman of value that is worth a lot of effort.
> 
> Nowhere does it ever say to be nasty.


I read the book and don't disagree with you. I like that she advocates for women to have boundaries and expectations, however the part that made me cringe is how she describes men as ego driven, simple creatures. I'm not sure that i buy that.


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

Lila said:


> I read the book and don't disagree with you. I like that she advocates for women to have boundaries and expectations, however the part that made me cringe is how she describes men as ego driven, simple creatures. I'm not sure that i buy that.


Yeah, I agree that does most men a disservice. All men have an ego, but the extent that they're influenced by said ego varies greatly.

And of course women have an ego too.


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## D0nnivain (Mar 13, 2021)

Two pop psychology books by Dr. Laura: _The Care & Feeding of a Husband _and _The Care & Feeding of a Marriage._ Both contain some pretty misogynistic drivel but if you can wade through that they are about appreciation, being thankful for the good things in your life not focusing on what you think you don't have. 

Three years ago I joined a book club at my church & have been helped tremendously by many of the books the group has read, which have deepened my faith & brought peace to my life.


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## Lila (May 30, 2014)

D0nnivain said:


> Two pop psychology books by Dr. Laura: _The Care & Feeding of a Husband _and _The Care & Feeding of a Marriage._ Both contain some pretty misogynistic drivel but if you can wade through that they are about appreciation, being thankful for the good things in your life not focusing on what you think you don't have.
> 
> Three years ago I joined a book club at my church & have been helped tremendously by many of the books the group has read, which have deepened my faith & brought peace to my life.


The parts of the book I've read didn't appeal to me. Her advice was not about self improvement or how to be a better woman. The parts I read were instructions on how to appease husbands which doesn't necessarily translate to self improvement or becoming a better woman in general. 

I'm not interested in paying money for the book but am curious to know how that book help you become a better woman. What were the things she advised in her book that you'd recommend to other women?


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

I've listened to a lot of Dr Laura. She's a bit too stuck in the 50's for my taste but she does make a lot of good points about how women devalue themselves. Her list of the top 10 things women do to screw up their lives is quite good.

She has a list for the men as well.


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## Lila (May 30, 2014)

lifeistooshort said:


> I've listened to a lot of Dr Laura. She's a bit too stuck in the 50's for my taste but she does make a lot of good points about how women devalue themselves. Her list of the top 10 things women do to screw up their lives is quite good.
> 
> She has a list for the men as well.


I hadn't heard of those books but i googled and found
Dr. Laura's 10 Stupid Things Women Do To Mess Up Their Lives.
Dr. Laura's 10 Stupid Things Men Do To Mess Up Their Lives.


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## Lila (May 30, 2014)

Another favorite of mine is Brene Brown. All of her books are excellent (Daring Greatly is still my favorite) but she's got a podcast called The Gratitude Project which I highly recommend.


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## D0nnivain (Mar 13, 2021)

Lila said:


> What were the things she advised in her book that you'd recommend to other women?


It's what I said about appreciation. Being happy with what you have rather than focusing on what you think is missing from your life. 

I read these books years ago before I had a therapist who made me create a gratitude journal, where I had to list 3 things I was grateful for every morning & 3 more at night. It's about shifting focus from want to abundance. 

I agree that a lot of what Dr. Laura says makes her seem to be stuck in the 50s & I did say a lot of it was anti-woman. To me the books were more like the old dating "tome" _The Rules_. The rules themselves, never accept a date from a man who doesn't ask on Wednesday, are insipid but if you read between the lines _The Rules_ were supposed to teach women to have self esteem & value themselves, their time & their thoughts.


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## Girl_power (Aug 11, 2018)

I love this topic so thanks for starting it!! 

I first thing I think of in what makes someone a better women is...what does the ideal women look like to you. And that is going to be answered very differently from different people. 
Also if I struggle with control, and aggressiveness, and “feminist” mentality I would want to read something a little more traditional and misogynistic if you would to help me balance. 
And if I’m struggling with lack of confidence and identity, gumption and self-worth, then I would want to read something empowering and feminist-ey. 

So I think whatever your ideal women is... where are you lacking in your personal definition, that will be the answer to what book and podcast you should listen to.


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## Girl_power (Aug 11, 2018)

lifeistooshort said:


> The title isn't meant to be taken literally....it doesn't actually say one should be a ***.
> 
> It talks about how to appeal to the part of men that likes to chase and it gives tips to present yourself as a woman of value that is worth a lot of effort.
> 
> Nowhere does it ever say to be nasty.


I’m going to read this one based on your description! Thanks for putting it on here.


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## Girl_power (Aug 11, 2018)

(By the way, how awesome would it be to do a book club type thing on this forum. I think if there’s enough people to want to read a certain book we should consider it! )


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

Ready for a slightly abstract take?

_Helped me as a woman... _I haven't read the books mentioned. I do have a couple on the shelf that Turnera has suggested on the forums, yet I've only skimmed these and couldn't say that I have read them. I'm hard pressed to think of books written by women that have 'helped' me as a woman. Instead, there are a couple of books that have really stayed with me. The first, I read at age 7 (or rather, was on cassette tape as an audio-book). I listened to it so much, and revisited this book even in recent years; despite the fact I could almost recite it by heart. It's a children's book by Oscar Wilde, called 'The Happy Prince'. You know how certain music becomes a soundtrack to moments in your life and brings you back to a part of yourself? Well, that's what this story does for me.


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

I'll admit that I've been a bit over TED Talks in recent times, however, I came across this just the other week. While not by a woman for a woman, I enjoyed giving focus to this.


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

Here's a talk that also 'stayed' with me, with the notion that compassion takes a 'strong back and a soft front'.


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

I guess reflections on being human that are within our book collection, include the likes of Victor Frankl, Alan Watts, Thich Nhat Hanh, Krishnamurti, Miyamoto Musashi. 

And I do have 'The Conscious Catwoman Explains Life On Earth' - Julie Newmar 😸


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