# where do i go from here?



## Heads.a.mess (Aug 14, 2012)

Hi, really hope you can give me some advice.

Ill just give you the basics and take it from there,my wife has been having an affair for the last 6 months with a so called mate.... we have been married for just over 2 years and have been together for 8 years. we bought a house roughly 12 months ago with a deposit which was given to me by my family, we also have a 12 month old baby together. she is currently still seeing this man although she does deny it i have proof aswell.

where do i go from here? we got married in Barbados and had a prenuptial agreement but im not sure if that means anything in the uk?


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## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

Heads.a.mess said:


> Hi, really hope you can give me some advice.
> 
> Ill just give you the basics and take it from there,my wife has been having an affair for the last 6 months with a so called mate.... we have been married for just over 2 years and have been together for 8 years. we bought a house roughly 12 months ago with a deposit which was given to me by my family, we also have a 12 month old baby together. she is currently still seeing this man although she does deny it i have proof aswell.
> 
> where do i go from here? we got married in Barbados and had a prenuptial agreement but im not sure if that means anything in the uk?


Crush the affair.


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## Heads.a.mess (Aug 14, 2012)

Conrad said:


> Crush the affair.


Already tried to do that and people still can't believe it's still going on, it's all public knowledge now.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## spun (Jul 2, 2012)

Heads.a.mess said:


> Already tried to do that and people still can't believe it's still going on, it's all public knowledge now.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Where's your baby?

Is she still living at home?

Where is she getting her money from?


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## Heads.a.mess (Aug 14, 2012)

We are still in the same house as I refuse to leave so my daughter is still in the house with us, I pay all the bills and half the mortgage... Asked her to leave but she refuses because she won't live with her mother. I do find it hard because I work as a joiner full time and she only works part time at a bank and has an evening shift at the local pub and I hate been away from our daughter.. I know I could go for full custody of her but I wudnt be able to go part time with the job I do, I have plenty of places I can go stay but I don't see why I should go anywhere.. I know it isn't helping been in the same house but I don't know what else to do at the minute...
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## spun (Jul 2, 2012)

Heads.a.mess said:


> We are still in the same house as I refuse to leave so my daughter is still in the house with us, I pay all the bills and half the mortgage... Asked her to leave but she refuses because she won't live with her mother. I do find it hard because I work as a joiner full time and she only works part time at a bank and has an evening shift at the local pub and I hate been away from our daughter.. I know I could go for full custody of her but I wudnt be able to go part time with the job I do, I have plenty of places I can go stay but I don't see why I should go anywhere.. I know it isn't helping been in the same house but I don't know what else to do at the minute...
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


You are her backup plan. Without any consequences that is what you will continue to be.

File for D and full custody of your child.

It may snap her out if it. Maybe not. If it doesn't she wasn't worth sharing your life with moving forward.

If you don't respect yourself. She will never respect you.

Filing for D shows self respect. It says I'm not OK with this.

Take action. Now. Any words you lay on her will mean nothing.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Heads.a.mess (Aug 14, 2012)

Thankyou so much for your help, I'm seeing a solicitor next week to make a start on all this, just want to make sure I'm doing the right thing for me and my daughter

Thanks again, I'll update when I've spoken to my solicitor
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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