# How to Tell Him I'm Not Rapunzel



## bravenewworld (Mar 24, 2013)

After my divorce I cut my long-ish hair to 3-4 inches past shoulder length. However, I have a set of sexy long hair extensions I like to wear (sometimes) when I go out. Let's say 2-3x per month I'll clip them in. 

Last week I met a guy that seems really nice, and we are supposed to go on a date. However, I didn't tell him I was wearing hair extensions and now I feel kind of weird showing up with my hair six inches shorter! One friend says I should just tell him I cut it, and another said to wear the extensions on the actual date to keep up the ruse. I feel like the first option is lying and the second option is kind of phoney because I don't wear them that often. 

I just wanted to change up my hairstyle and have fun, but now I feel like a bald dude wearing a toupee.


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## Holland (Aug 20, 2012)

The bald guy line was funny >

I have long, naturally wavy hair with a bit of curl but often straighten it, especially when going out. When I first met Mr H it was straightened and it took me a while to tell him it was wavy and then for him to see it. Turns out that he loves my hair both ways, straight or curly. 

In your situation if you are going to go with your own hair then tell him before the date and tell him you like to change your style occasionally.


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## SecondTime'Round (Jan 15, 2015)

I've never worn hair extensions (but I would if I knew how), but so many people do these days. I think I'd just be honest if he says anything about it. If he says he liked your hair long you can say, "I'll wear them on our next date!"


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## Lila (May 30, 2014)

bravenewworld said:


> I just wanted to change up my hairstyle and have fun, but now I feel like a bald dude wearing a toupee.


Ha! :laugh: 

I would just tell him that I got a haircut and am looking forward to showing it off to him :wink2:


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## happy as a clam (Jan 5, 2014)

Don't lie to him about something so silly as hair extensions!

I would go without them on the next date... if he mentions the change in your hair, simply tell him you often wear hair extensions just to change things up but aren't wearing them tonight.

Simple.


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## kristin2349 (Sep 12, 2013)

happy as a clam said:


> Don't lie to him about something so silly as hair extensions!
> 
> I would go without them on the next date... if he mentions the change in your hair, simply tell him you often wear hair extensions just to change things up but aren't wearing them tonight.
> 
> Simple.



I agree. He might not notice a thing. People don't scrutinize our appearance like we think they do. 

If you don't wear them often, go without them. It would be awful to have to clip them in all the time just to keep up some charade for a few extra inches of hair. Eventually he is going to find out, especially if he puts his hands in your hair.


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## Anonymous07 (Aug 4, 2012)

happy as a clam said:


> Don't lie to him about something so silly as hair extensions!
> 
> I would go without them on the next date... if he mentions the change in your hair, simply tell him you often wear hair extensions just to change things up but aren't wearing them tonight.
> 
> Simple.


^ This. 

Don't over complicate things. It's not like you're trying to trick him into something. It's just hair. If he's honestly that upset about you having shorter hair, then he obviously isn't the right guy.


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

Different wigs for every date.


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## UMP (Dec 23, 2014)

I would not wear the extensions the next time you see him. I'm sure you look fine with or without them. When you see him next, simply tell him what you told us. "Sometimes I wear hair extentions" and leave it at that. If you wear the extensions and don't tell him, he will eventually find out and think you are trying to hide things from him, not good.


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## happy as a clam (Jan 5, 2014)

A set of hair extensions is no different than any other female "beauty product" -- false eyelashes, (h*ll, makeup for THAT matter!), Spandex, push-up bras, teeth-bleaching, fake spray-tans, nail tips, etc. Are you going to tell him, "These are fake nails"??? God forbid, one chips and falls off. Or, "Oh, my teeth are really yellow but I bleach them every week!"

Lighten up, OP. Hair extension kiosks are in every mall and every hair salon. It's just another fashion choice.


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## jb02157 (Apr 16, 2014)

I'll never understand why women want to wear male hair styles. It's plain not attractive.


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

jb02157 said:


> I'll never understand why women want to wear male hair styles. It's plain not attractive.



Agree. But 3-4" past the shoulders does not fit in this category. 

I wouldn't even mention it or think about it. I doubt he will mention it but if he does just tell him the truth as stated above.


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## happy as a clam (Jan 5, 2014)

jb02157 said:


> I'll never understand why women want to wear male hair styles. It's plain not attractive.


You mean like *THIS:* (I totally agree)










:rofl:


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## weightlifter (Dec 14, 2012)

Dont worry about it unless you are covering truly short hair...
or a Sinead Oconnor.


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## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good evening
In my innocence I never knew hair extensions existed. If I met a woman and later discovered she had hair extensions, I would be surprised simply because it was a new concept. Otherwise I would have no negative reaction at all.

Women look beautiful with long hear. Women look beautiful with short cropped hair, or curly hair, or .... you get the idea.

As always I think its the entire picture that matters.


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## lucy999 (Sep 28, 2014)

Go without the extensions. And frankly, his reaction (if any) will tell you all you need to know. If he freaks out, N-E-X-T. If he compliments your hair, maybe he'll score a second date. If he doesn't notice at all, maybe he'll score a second date. Because he's a man, after all. They usually don't notice things like that, unless they have a clear hatred for shortish hair. And if that's the case, you don't want to be with him anyway. 

Hope you have fun!:grin2:


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## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

How about buying some floor length extensions and wearing them on your next date...then the next time, wear your hair up so the length is impossible to determine....and then the next date, wear a wig of a hair color that is entirely different than your real color....and later, go on a date with just your natural hair and no extensions or anything. This way you'll seem like a variety of beauties all in one woman!


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## Fozzy (Jul 20, 2013)

Faithful Wife said:


> How about buying some floor length extensions and wearing them on your next date...then the next time, wear your hair up so the length is impossible to determine....and then the next date, wear a wig of a hair color that is entirely different than your real color....and later, go on a date with just your natural hair and no extensions or anything. This way you'll seem like a variety of beauties all in one woman!


Actually not a bad idea. I really like it when my wife shows up with a new hairstyle or length. Changing up your look is a great way to keep things interesting.

And don't let anybody get you down about having short hair. I likes me a good pixie cut.

Just don't do the Kate Gosselin "I'd Like To Speak To Your Manager" haircut.


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## lucy999 (Sep 28, 2014)

Fozzy said:


> Just don't do the Kate Gosselin "I'd Like To Speak To Your Manager" haircut.


:rofl::rofl::rofl:

Oh that is COMEDY GOLD! I've heard a few great descriptions for her hair, but this one gets the trophy.


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## Decorum (Sep 7, 2012)

I don't understand why you don't just wear the extensions to the date then causally mention during the conversation that your hair is shorter and you hope it does not freak him out if he sees you without them sometime?


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## EnigmaGirl (Feb 7, 2015)

I actually started laughing at this post because it reminded me of this old scene in a old movie called "I'm Gonna Get You Sucka" where this woman gets a guy back to her place and reveals her real self by taking off her wig, butt implants, breast implants, fake leg, etc. She spends part of the scene hopping after him while he tries to bug out of her apartment.

Anyway, I don't see this as any big deal. Its just hair and I'm sure its pretty on you both long and short. 

Just show up with your hair however you want and tell him. You dressing up is part of who you are and if he doesn't accept it ...better to know now rather than later. 

The only thing that's kind of inappropriate would be not telling him while he's trying to run his fingers through your hairclips...especially if he managed to pull one off...LOL.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

EnigmaGirl said:


> I actually started laughing at this post because it reminded me of this old scene in a old movie called "I'm Gonna Get You Sucka" where this woman gets a guy back to her place and reveals her real self by taking off her wig, butt implants, breast implants, fake leg, etc. She spends part of the scene hopping after him while he tries to bug out of her apartment.


You made me google, and I assume you mean this scene?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-1C6QlvHl8

lol!


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## Chelle D (Nov 30, 2011)

Would you stop & not date him if he was a bald dude wearing a toupee??

I say, go with natural hair. If he asks if you cut it, or comments that it's a nice hair cut.... Then you could just say "thanks, but it's not a cut, I was wearing extensions the other time".

If he doesn't mention anything, than he probably was more interested in you, than your hair!... If he seems "affronted" that you don't have long hair on the date...... let that one walk..

Just like if a bald guy's toupee "accidently falls off"... If it stops her from doing a second date, she wasn't interested in the "person" instead of the hairstyle, and she didn't deserve a second date anyway.

If he doesn't want a second date because your natural hair is shorter that he had seen it before... he won't deserve a second date.


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

Don't worry. If it gets to the point where you take his pants off you'll find a rolled up sock anyway! 

Just kidding! It probably isn't a big deal. 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## 6301 (May 11, 2013)

I remember back in 1969, I meet a girl a local burger joint hang out and we arranged a date. She had short blond hair and pretty eyes. Few days later I went to her house to pick her up and while I'm waiting I saw this girl walking towards me wearing glasses and very thick dark brown hair that went mid way down he back. I said hi and she said hi and I'm standing there and she finally said "are you ready?" and I looked at her and asked who she was and if she was the girl I met a few nights ago sister?. I wasn't. It was a pair of contact lens and a short blond wig. I was kind of pissed that I felt like she bamboozled me.


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## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

Chelle D said:


> Would you stop & not date him if he was a bald dude wearing a toupee??
> 
> Just like if a bald guy's toupee "accidently falls off"... If it stops her from doing a second date, she wasn't interested in the "person" instead of the hairstyle, and she didn't deserve a second date anyway.


Not sure I could date a guy who wore a toupee. But only because all the men I've ever known personally who wore one were .... .... um ... kind of weird. Kind of arrogant and obsessive about the bald thing...like, arrogant, but they didn't really accept themselves and their baldness at all. And they were really upset at the topic of baldness or their toupees. They would get all weird about it, like they would deny wearing one in mixed company. 

If a man is gonna wear a toupee, he should be totally open about it, IMO. 

Though I think a woman should be open about that, too if she keeps seeing a guy.


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

I think finding out your hair isn't really as long as it appeared when he met you will be much less disappointing, not to mention he probably won't even notice, than finding out your D cup breasts are really B cup breasts. While a wonder bra really does do wonders for your cleavage, eventually the guy is going to discover what's really under that dress.

My H's aunt married a guy who thought she was a natural blonde, through out their whole marriage. How he never noticed the roots is beyond me.


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Wear a sexy dress and hoist your cleavage up. He won't notice your hair.


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## Chelle D (Nov 30, 2011)

Okay... You've got a point about a lot of types that wear toupee's. Some do seem to be obsessive about it and not accepting of their own baldness.


I guess I really meant if you wouldn't date a bald person - "only" because of the baldness.
If he doesn't give a second date- 'only' because of your hair not being super long... well..... 

I guess that's his choice.

However, I really feel that you've got the personality that attracted him.Not just your hair style or fashion sense.
If you truly feel he'd be affronted because you wore extensions... that's your decision to date him or not.
If you're just worried b/c you are a fashion forward person, that he'll not be interested because you changed up the fasion, I'd say, Don't be worried.

I'm sure there's something inside of you that he was attracted to.


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## Chelle D (Nov 30, 2011)

BTW, is the date this weekend? Next?
Let us know how he measures up.


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Chelle D said:


> BTW, is the date this weekend? Next?
> Let us know how he measures up.


Yes. Take a tape measure. Ace hardware sells those little Stanley 10' tape measures for like $7. Report back with the exact measurement.


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## Chelle D (Nov 30, 2011)

bandit.45 said:


> Yes. Take a tape measure. Ace hardware sells those little Stanley 10' tape measures for like $7. Report back with the exact measurement.


And don't tell us 7 inches.>


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## Fozzy (Jul 20, 2013)

Anon Pink said:


> I think finding out your hair isn't really as long as it appeared when he met you will be much less disappointing, not to mention he probably won't even notice, than finding out your D cup breasts are really B cup breasts. While a wonder bra really does do wonders for your cleavage, eventually the guy is going to discover what's really under that dress.
> 
> My H's aunt married a guy who thought she was a natural blonde, through out their whole marriage. How he never noticed the roots is beyond me.


What about Spanx? Are those cheating?


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

Fozzy said:


> What about Spanx? Are those cheating?


Cheating? Noooo. Nothing is cheating really. If you fall for the package you will be disappointed at some point. Spanx don't turn an 80 year old into a 50 year old. Right?


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## EnigmaGirl (Feb 7, 2015)

> You made me google, and I assume you mean this scene?
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-1C6QlvHl8
> 
> lol!


lmao...that's the one. Thanks for that link...I haven't seen it in ages and I die laughing every time.


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## bravenewworld (Mar 24, 2013)

Oh my goodness this thread had me giggling!

Update post-date: I did not wear my hair extensions. We sat down. He studied my face. Squinted. Then said-

"Did you get a tan?"

So yea, uh, he didn't even notice.


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## Blaine (Jul 23, 2015)

As a guy I learned a long time ago a woman's hair can change on a daily basis. And to be quite honest its not worth lying over and the only reason its important is if you first meeting was short and you meet in a crowded place he may be only able to identify you by the hair LOL I like the sexy dress and push up bra idea. and yes if he freaks cuz your hair is shorter then run.


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## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

Go with your natural hair, if the guy is so bothered by your change in hair style then he is too shallow for you to waste your time on him. Move along.


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## SecondTime'Round (Jan 15, 2015)

bravenewworld said:


> Oh my goodness this thread had me giggling!
> 
> Update post-date: I did not wear my hair extensions. We sat down. He studied my face. Squinted. Then said-
> 
> ...


Haha!


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## Lila (May 30, 2014)

bravenewworld said:


> Oh my goodness this thread had me giggling!
> 
> Update post-date: I did not wear my hair extensions. We sat down. He studied my face. Squinted. Then said-
> 
> ...


LMAO! So is there going to be a second date? (yeah, I'm nosey)


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## Chelle D (Nov 30, 2011)

i was just checking back to see how the date when with Prince Charming (or whomever was Rapunzel's co-character)...

Okay, so he didn't notice... Was he not much to mention about?? Was he worth all the fretting? Or was the date 'meh' and he didn't impress you, even though he didn't freak about the hair.

Or.. did he "Not" impress you, _because_ he didn't notice the hair??

Is there a second date that we can guess what hairstyle you'll go with?


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## FeministInPink (Sep 13, 2012)

Faithful Wife said:


> Not sure I could date a guy who wore a toupee. But only because all the men I've ever known personally who wore one were .... .... um ... kind of weird. Kind of arrogant and obsessive about the bald thing...like, arrogant, but they didn't really accept themselves and their baldness at all. And they were really upset at the topic of baldness or their toupees. They would get all weird about it, like they would deny wearing one in mixed company.
> 
> If a man is gonna wear a toupee, he should be totally open about it, IMO.
> 
> Though I think a woman should be open about that, too if she keeps seeing a guy.


Oh, I know, I wouldn't date someone who wears a toupee... it's just weird. If you're going bald, just own it. Bald can be very sexy. Every person I've known who wears a toupee was just a little bit... off...

And I think the mentality behind wearing a toupee and wearing extensions is totally different.


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## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

I came to this thread to take a break from the alpha one. BNW, I can't offer much advice - bald guy here who has never worn a toupee, though a couple years ago I found a bunch of fine hairs growing which I thought were new growth but turns out they were the remnants of dying ones. From a logical point of view, going without the extensions he'd just think you got a haircut, but if you put them back in on a third date that would be a mindfvck for him.


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## bravenewworld (Mar 24, 2013)

Lila said:


> LMAO! So is there going to be a second date? (yeah, I'm nosey)


We already had a second date! I really enjoy his company. He even brought me a bouquet of wildflowers. ::swoon::

It was pretty funny he didn't notice my hair on our first date. I didn't notice the fact he shaved off his beard. I guess we are even. :grin2:


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## anonmd (Oct 23, 2014)

If I noticed the change and was told it was extensions I'd be intrigued, all assuming the extensions had looked natural of course. 

The things women worry about, amazing. BTW, if you are 45+ and a knockout in a dress. It's not a surprise when we see you naked if your boobs don't poke out straight and there is a bit of a muffin top.


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## Chelle D (Nov 30, 2011)

Did you wear the extensions on second date? If not, wear on third!..
LOL not notice his shaved beard??? = ouch (lol). The guy spruced himself up spiffy, just for you & you didn't notice. *tsk, tsk*

Gee, I can just see it before the date.....
Him: Do I leave my beard, or shave it for the date?
His friend: Does it matter? If you don't normally wear it, shave nice for a date.
Him: But what if she was attracted to me only because of the beard?
His friend: If she doesn't want a second date, only because you shaved yourself nice for her... She isn't worth it.

Laughing in my mind.


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