# Is it in bad taste to...



## kittykatz (Feb 22, 2013)

post pictures on facebook of your baby holding alcohol? Even if the bottle of alcohol isn't opened.... do you consider these types of pictures "cute" or is it just in poor taste? 

What about posting pictures on facebook of your baby wearing clothes that have profanity written on them, such as the F word? 

I know its not like the baby has any clue what the word means or that its a swear word... but again, don't you think its just a little bit distasteful?

Don't get me wrong. I've seen some baby clothes that had little sayings written on them that I thought were actually pretty funny/cute. I just don't see the need for the profanity.

Just looking for opinions here because I know someone who posts pictures like these. I've never said anything to the person about it... I usually just try to ignore it.... but in the back of my mind, I can't help but to find it somewhat trashy. Its not that I think this person would ever let their baby actually drink the alcohol or anything like that... I don't believe she is an irresponsible parent... I don't feel that the child's safety is at risk, therefore I think it wouldn't be my place to say anything about it. My opinion is just that its not something thats my style, and not something I'd do with my child. Even if I did think that having my baby pose holding a wine bottle was cute, I probably wouldn't post it on facebook for everyone to see... I'd keep it to myself.

Just out of curiosity, has anyone else here posted these types of pictures online? Is it something thats more common than I think it is?


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Of course some of this is trashy. I don't like facebook.. this is one of the reasons.

It's like 4 something in the morning where you live. Why are you up? (Yes I'm acting like your mother  ) Seriously you have been up all night. Do you have insomnia?


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## kittykatz (Feb 22, 2013)

EleGirl said:


> Of course some of this is trashy. I don't like facebook.. this is one of the reasons.
> 
> It's like 4 something in the morning where you live. Why are you up? (Yes I'm acting like your mother  ) Seriously you have been up all night. Do you have insomnia?


Its because of my work schedule. I don't have to go into work until 3 PM so I usually always stay up until 4 or 5 in the morning and then wake up late in the afternoon right before its time for work. I'm actually going to bed here in just a minute.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Did you know that staying up late like that ruins your health? People who work gave yard shifts have a lot of health problems from it.

I have a brother who has worked graveyard for years.. 3-4 nights a week. His health has suffered very much for it.

You might want to rethink this all night thing you do... 

Is your husband up all night with you as well?


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## kittykatz (Feb 22, 2013)

Yea I know its not good which is why I don't always do it.... But I do do it most of the time. Sometimes I try to make myself go to sleep earlier but its really hard to do once you get used to a certain schedule. 

And no he doesnt... he stays up kind of late but not as late as me. He went to bed a couple hours ago.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

I have gotten into a bad sleep schedule as well. So I get how this happens.

I have been using Melatonin to get me back on track. I forgot to take it earlier and got tied up in this silly site so I'm still on here. But I did take it a bit ago and I’m getting sleepy.

When the sun goes down our body produces Melatonin. That's the thing that makes us sleepy at night. It's a natural supplement available at drug stores, Wal-Mart, etc.

It helps regulate your sleep cycle without using drugs. You might want to try it. 

Also things like TV, gaming and the internet keep us all up for hours. They are sleep distroyers.


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

Not only is that in bad taste, it is down right trashy. I don't understand why people go out of their way to do things like this. What happened to people having a little class?:scratchhead:


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## I got this (Feb 25, 2013)

Not cool. Looking for attention. Pathetic. No damage now but when the kid grows up and becomes a priest or something he may resent his mother for it then. Consequences of stupidity are not always apparent at first glance


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## hambone (Mar 30, 2013)

When I see a picture of a child posted with alcohol, or wearing shirts with offensive language or engaged in any activity (Cigarette dangling out of their mouth etc) that is inappropriate for their age.... it just shouts that their parents are immature and unsophisticated. 

Probably the same people that smear wedding cake in each others faces.


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## Jane_Doe (Aug 9, 2012)

My older sister does this with her kids all the time, and ugh, it's just horrible. They think it's hilarious. Her boyfriend holds the bottle to the baby's lips even if it has stuff in it! In my view they're classless and trashy.

They also think it's funny when a 2-3 year old is learning to talk and yells out swear words and death threats.


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

hambone said:


> When I see a picture of a child posted with alcohol, or wearing shirts with offensive language or engaged in any activity (Cigarette dangling out of their mouth etc) that is inappropriate for their age.... it just shouts that their parents are immature and unsophisticated.
> 
> Probably the same people that smear wedding cake in each others faces.


I agree about the inappropriate activities portion of the above quoted post. It is wrong on so many levels. But to say it's probably the same people that smear wedding cake in each others faces? Not exactly accurate. My husband and I did that and we both find the actions depicted in those pictures of young children abhorrent. As do both of my sisters. I know of people who DIDN'T do that with their wedding cake and they actually post those kinds of pictures of kids. One has nothing to do with the other.


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## Bellavista (May 29, 2012)

It is trashy, I have a cousin like that, she is a real bogan. Then, their kids get bigger, start drinking at 9yo and swear at their teachers and the parents blame the school system and/or society...


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## kittykatz (Feb 22, 2013)

Wow I didn't expect to see so many people agree with me on this... I thought I might just be being old fashioned since I come from a much more conservative family than this person. 

I've asked my husband his opinion on this and he almost acts as if he doesn't really see the big deal... He doesn't feel that they would ever actually let their kid DRINK the alcohol, which I don't either, but I still find the pictures inappropriate. I guess since he doesn't think that they'd ever let their child drink it, thats all that matters... and as far as the clothes with swear words on them, I think he just looks at that as having a little fun... no harm done. He says "Its not like the baby can read."

I just think there is more to it than that. If they're putting clothes with swear words on them on their kid, its probably not a stretch to say that they say those words in front of their kid.... because it seems like they take those words very lightly. If they do say words like that in front of the child, its not going to take long before she starts picking up on it and will be saying them. I guess some people would just laugh and think its "cute" but not me. Growing up in MY parents house, you did not use that kind of language, and if you did, you were scolded for it. Besides, even if they don't swear in front of the baby, what happens one day when the kid IS old enough to talk... and shes looking at pictures of herself when she was a baby and says "mommy.... what does my shirt say?" And then whats the mom going to say? "well.... honey.... I can't tell you that because it has a bad word on it". Its going to confuse the crap out of the child.... Its teaching her that there are bad words which she isn't allowed to say, but yet its ok to wear clothes with bad words on them??

The same can be said for alcohol. When they get older, are they going to be taught that they aren't allowed to drink alcohol but its ok if they take pictures of themselves holding the alcohol and acting like they're drinking it? Its ok to look like you're promoting alcohol as long as you don't drink it? Personally I don't think either one is acceptable.

The woman I'm talking about is young.... but still I think shes old enough to know better. I'm 4 years younger than her, and at only 22 years old I wouldn't post those types of pictures, or even take them in the first place, to be honest. Even before she had her baby, she would post a lot of pictures of her going out, partying, drinking a lot.... shes just one of those people that acts like she doesn't really care what others think. 

Apparently, she must have offended others before with some of her pictures.... because I remember one time she posted a picture of her baby wearing a shirt that said "I love my mommy".... and then in very small letters below that it said "even though shes a b****!". She captioned the picture by saying "If this offends you, keep your negative comments to yourself, because it doesn't offend me". And lets not forget her other picture that she posted of her baby wearing something that said "One cute f**king baby"... except it actually spelled out the whole word. I found this picture to be even a little more shocking than the other one... I usually just try to not say anything at all when she posts these types of things. I'm not going to lie and pretend like its the cutest picture in the world... but like I said, I don't feel like it would be my place to call her out on it either. I don't think she would ever put her baby at any serious risk or anything... I just think shes making herself come off as a not very classy person. 

The first time I saw a picture of her baby with alcohol was when she was only a few months old. She was sleeping on the floor, and they put a wine bottle next to her... they said it was to show how little she was, compared to the size of the wine bottle.... but then when they saw how "funny" it looked to see her laying with a wine bottle next to her, they decided to have fun with it. So she ended up laying there with a wine bottle next to her, a cigar in one hand, and a bottle of pills on the other side of her.... so it looked like instead of sleeping, she had passed out from all the pills and booze. They thought it was just hilarious. I didn't find it funny, but I tried not to think too much of it. It was only a few months later and she was posting similar pictures. Her husband is in the marines and I remember he got some type of promotion or something, and they brought their baby to the ceremony with them.... they were celebrating with a bottle of wine and they went out of their way to put the bottle of wine in their baby's lap and then snap a picture. After I started seeing pictures like this on a regular basis, it started to become a little bit annoying. Everytime I would see one I'd just kind of roll my eyes and say great... another picture of the baby holding alcohol again.... how hilarious.


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## hambone (Mar 30, 2013)

Maricha75 said:


> I agree about the inappropriate activities portion of the above quoted post. It is wrong on so many levels. But to say it's probably the same people that smear wedding cake in each others faces? Not exactly accurate. My husband and I did that and we both find the actions depicted in those pictures of young children abhorrent. As do both of my sisters. I know of people who DIDN'T do that with their wedding cake and they actually post those kinds of pictures of kids. One has nothing to do with the other.



I did say, "probably"..

Smearing the cake... IMO that just indicates a lack of respect for your spouse.

Posting those kinds of pictures... I find that disrespectful of your kids.


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

hambone said:


> I did say, "probably"..
> 
> Smearing the cake... IMO that just indicates a lack of respect for your spouse.
> 
> Posting those kinds of pictures... I find that disrespectful of your kids.


Well, regarding the cake... you are entitled to your opinion, of course. Neither my husband nor I viewed it that we. We were having fun... and had fun cleaning it off each other, too. 

As for the pictures, I do agree with you on that. Completely.


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## soccermom2three (Jan 4, 2013)

I think it's pretty trashy especially when it's done on purpose and but ....

I have a picture of myself when I was about 3 years old. I'm wearing a pair of my mom's heels and her sunglasses. I'm standing next to a coffee table with my hand in the air. On the table is a beer. In the picture it looks like I'm ordering another one. It's probably my dad's beer and it just happened to be there when my mom snapped the picture. I think it's a funny picture.


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## Lyris (Mar 29, 2012)

I don't do this myself but I don't care much if other people do. There's more than one way to live.


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## hambone (Mar 30, 2013)

Maricha75 said:


> Well, regarding the cake... you are entitled to your opinion, of course. Neither my husband nor I viewed it that we. We were having fun... and had fun cleaning it off each other, too.
> 
> As for the pictures, I do agree with you on that. Completely.


I know a lot of people must agree with you because a lot of people do the cake smearing thing.

That said, I love my wife so much. I respect her so much. I have never once done anything disrespectful, embarrassing or humiliating to her in pubic. And, I especially not in front of a crowd. I just don't derive any please out of that kind of behavior. I think it sends a message that I don't want to send... IE.. that I don't respect my wife. 

I feel the same way about my kids.


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## FrenchFry (Oct 10, 2011)

I'm with Lyris. People definitely have different parental styles and senses of humor, as well as what they feel would be appropriate for their child.



> If they're putting clothes with swear words on them on their kid, its probably not a stretch to say that they say those words in front of their kid.... because it seems like they take those words very lightly. If they do say words like that in front of the child, its not going to take long before she starts picking up on it and will be saying them. I guess some people would just laugh and think its "cute" but not me.


We swear in front of our 2 year old. Not excessively by any means, and we have cut down (especially my husband) from where we were pre-child, but both of us grew up in households where we were taught words we could use exclusively inside our house and how to speak politely outside of our house and we plan to teach our son the same. So far, he has a huge vocabulary with no curse words but the time will come when we get to talk about "inside" and "outside" words.

As far as storytelling goes, one of my mom's favorite stories involves my pre-school age sister breaking a toy before daycare in the car and saying "Well S***" with perfect usage. Different strokes.

I wouldn't post pictures with my son with alcohol or drugs, but I get the appeal as we have many pictures of him posing mini-adult style. The best thing I think you are doing is not flaming her out on Facebook because, like she said, it' doesn't offend her...and it's her child with whom she will have to deal with in the future.


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

hambone said:


> I know a lot of people must agree with you because a lot of people do the cake smearing thing.
> 
> That said, I love my wife so much. I respect her so much. I have never once done anything disrespectful, embarrassing or humiliating to her in pubic. And, I especially not in front of a crowd. I just don't derive any please out of that kind of behavior. I think it sends a message that I don't want to send... IE.. that I don't respect my wife.
> 
> I feel the same way about my kids.


As do I... that is, I love my husband and kids too much to humiliate, embarrass, or disrespect them, especially in public. I guess we just don't necessarily agree what is disrespectful, in general.


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## Wiltshireman (Jan 23, 2013)

Whether a photo is "trashy" or not depends on the people and the circumstances.

For drinks in the picture we have a photograph of my eldest in the family Christening robe with us all holding glasses of wine to toast her "wet the babies head". I do not think that is "trashy" or in poor taste. 

What does annoy me is where children are show "seemingly" drinking or wearing stuff with rude messages on it. I think there is too much pressure to make kids act / look older than their years.

Let’s let kids be kids, adulthood is for adults.


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## Cooper (Apr 18, 2008)

In my opinion it shows a complete lack of parental responsibilities, what it's doing is desensitizing the kids to all sorts of bad behavior. As kids grow they mimic those around them and they become accustomed to the environment they live in. So if drinking, drugs, smoking and raunchy jokes are what the kids become use to how will they grow up to know better?


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## Wiltshireman (Jan 23, 2013)

Cooper said:


> So if drinking, drugs, smoking and raunchy jokes are what the kids become use to how will they grow up to know better?



Cooper, 

I think you might be taking it a bit far to say any drinking, smoking, raunchy joke telling is irresponsible parenting.

IMO As parents we are better of explaining to our children and giving a good example of how to act responsibly rather than having a blanket prohibition.

I do on occasion have a small glass of wine or a shady with a meal out if I am driving home. 

I allow my teenage children to have a glass of wine / beer at home but remind them they must be 18 (in the UK) to buy it at a shop / club / restaurant.

I do smoke cigarettes but not, in the house (our house rule), inside any public building (UK Law), in my wife’s car (her rule), In my car if there are kids in the car (my rule).

As for raunchy jokes I would think that by the time most kids are at senior school (11 in the UK not sure what grade that is in the US) the kids will have heard all the words / jokes already so you just have to educate them about tailoring the joke to the audience.

I do not take any illegal drugs and there is a “not under my roof” rule in place for visitors but that has not stopped me from speaking truthfully to my children about the relative dangers of the various drugs that are available on the “black market” in most towns / cities.


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