# Process of Divorce??



## skippyizz (Sep 5, 2010)

I am currently separated from my husband, I have made the decision that it Divorce is the best thing for me. I know some people have been through this or are going through this. I have read a few books to help me about abuse especially emotional. I however am a bit confused about the process of divorce. I know I need to file and I believe in the state of Massachusetts but I have no idea what it entails or how to go through it without the assistance of a lawyer right now. I don't have the money to be able to hire a lawyer right now and really want to get the process moving forward. Any recommendations are greatly appreciated.

Thank you


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## Shelly29 (Oct 9, 2010)

I'm and going through a Mediator as we are not really fighting for anything.... I heard its a bit less stressful and less expensive too. But I'm just beginning too!


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## skippyizz (Sep 5, 2010)

Thanks Shelly, it's been almost 4 months since I had to have my mom and sister help me leave my husband and we haven't talked once. I'm so afraid of talking to him, he was emotionally abusive. He won't accept that I'm not coming back, no matter how many times I've told him through emails, letters and text messsages. I might look into a mediator, I've been looking at councelors but he only took that as me being willing to work on things and it's more than I can handle I wish there was a crying one because that would fit better there. I just want to start the process and let myself heal so I can move on with my life and get on to better things.


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## Shelly29 (Oct 9, 2010)

Are you seeing a counselor yourself, to help clear your mind and help you out emotionally...it might help get all the crazy emotions out and have a clear head when it comes time to settle everything.


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## skippyizz (Sep 5, 2010)

Yes Shelly, I am seeing a counselor myself. I started seeing one the same month I escaped. I have gotten a lot stronger, but I still can't shake this feeling of being afraid of him. My counselor is urging me to have us both see a couples counselor to work through some things, but I think I need to change to another counselor because her expectations and mine are not the same and I feel a little like she is working against me on some of it.


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## LVS (Apr 5, 2010)

skippyizz i live in Ca and i went through similar situation i saw legal free advisor through YMCA She took care of all the papers and i had the divorce fees waived because of my low income
hope this link can lead you to a place close to you

http://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C...m=1&sqi=2&ved=0CCgQtQMwAA&fp=6e8733203d1b4e27

As for the counseling thing, I don't know the whole situation but IMO if your H is abuser whether verbally emotionally or physically he needs to see individual counselor and work on his own issues first then you might be able to try to give him another chance and go together to a couples counselor.

Good luck


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## skippyizz (Sep 5, 2010)

LVS- Thank you, that had some interesting links in it. The whole situation is hard to handle let alone worrying about financing the divorce. 

He supposidly is seeing a counselor himself, however I don't see any kind of effort being put forth by him. After being gone for almost 4 months we still haven't talked in person or on the phone only via text messages and emails. It's such an emotional situation to begin with, let alone having others throwing it off track.

Sorry about my rant lol. Thank you very much!


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## LVS (Apr 5, 2010)

I read your other posts and kind of i understand better your situation 
Your financial worries are because you still don't know what to do or where to go you can start with the free legal advice you may get spousal support they will tell you what you can do
Maybe you will feel better if you get a full time job...

You can also join united way they can also give you the support you need

Good you are seeing individual counselor too this is going to help you if you don't feel comfortable with the one you are seeing you can see another one but don't stop counseling you need it for your well being and self confidence.....


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