# Oral sex with my husband...



## Therealbrighteyes (Feb 11, 2010)

This is my first post and I am embarrassed to post it so bear with me. We have been married for 16 years and still relatively young at 38 (at least we think so). We have had a lousy marriage for most of our marriage. We didn't really fight per se, we just got into the habit of ignoring each other. That lead to terrible resentment on both our parts. My husband is a rare man in that he has to feel an emotional connection in order to want sex. Since we didn't have that he didn't want it. We had sex once every 4 months or so and he rarely jerked off. As he put it "I killed his sex drive". When we would have those rare moments of sex or sex related activities I would not let him cum in my mouth but I did when we were dating, often. I think in my own way I was "punishing him" for ignoring me. Not sure. He in turn got it in his brain to never cum in my mouth.
Now our relationship is a trillion times better. We both made an active decision to renew our marriage. It was January of 2009. He sat me down and told me he felt a lack of connection with me and he was thinking of divorce. We both agreed to work on us and we have ever since. Our marriage is better than ever. I look forward to seeing him, being with him, hugging him and making love with him. He feels the same way too. We make a total effort to make each other feel special, loved and adored. We have also been in marriage counseling for a year and we continue to go every week.

So here is my worry/question....we have been having sex regularly ever since. Nearly every night. And now the truly embarassing part....when I give him a bj he cannot cum. Not at all. I know he wants to but he cannot. For nearly a year we have tried but he cannot. I have told him that I want him to and that now I am in the place of loving him and the act. He is really trying and it pains me to see him so distressed over it. It has now gotten so bad that he sometimes gets soft when I go down on him. I think fear has gotten the best of him. What the hell should I do? I think he feels pressure from me but I don't know what to do about it. For example: two nights ago I wanted to go down on him and he stopped me and said no let's have sex instead. Today when I asked him why he is avoiding that he said he didn't know but thought that I work too hard and it wouldn't happen and that it would make me feel bad. Thoughts? In truth I do feel bad. Really bad. I was the one who stopped this long ago and the one who put this in his head not to. I don't know what to do. We have tried everything. I won't go into details but we have tried. He is now also having difficulty with masturbating on my body. It is almost as if he trained himself to only cum inside me. He has no health issues at all. None. Great shape, loves his job, not depressed in any sense and on no medication....all the things I would attribute to this. Is it me? That is my fear. Thank you for reading and I apologize in advance if it is too much. Any input is more than welcome.


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## Deejo (May 20, 2008)

Be patient. Be supportive. Don't take it personally. Kudos on recovering your marriage, it's always heartwarming and encouraging when a couple turns things around.

Performance anxiety sucks. There is no rhyme or reason to it. Sex with with my ex was like walking on egg-shells for a variety of reasons - consequently, the baggage left over from that relationship has carried into my newly emerging sex life.

The less you are hung up with him achieving an orgasm, the more at ease over time he will become with getting there. 

In terms of making him feel more at ease, you can simply lay off oral if it makes him anxious - or even better, condition him into recognizing that it's ok, and you are ok with it. Can he climax if you are masturbating him? If so, just as he starts to go - (not prior) use your mouth. In that way he is achieving orgasm, and gets to see that you really are ok, and maybe even enthusiastic about the idea of him cumming in your mouth.


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## Therealbrighteyes (Feb 11, 2010)

Thank you for your response! Yes, we have tried everything. God, this is so embarassing!!....he has tried cumming near my mouth and yet nothing. He said that associating my mouth with an orgasm is very difficult for him. I don't know what to do. I really don't. We have not brought this up to our marriage counselor as she is older, not a sex therapist and frankly would embarass my husband and I. What's worse is me asking him if he could do this with another woman (in his fantasies) and he said no. He cannot associate the two together. I feel awful, just freaking awful. I have also noticed the decline of him wanting to perform oral on me and asked him about that last night. This is a man who loved doing that for me. I asked him why and he said that if he did that for me he would be scared that I would feel the need to reciprocate so he feels nervous doing it. Seriously, what the hell do I do now?


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## Therealbrighteyes (Feb 11, 2010)

I posted this in two forums. I am unsure of the rules but would really love a man's input. Help!
This is my first post and I am embarrassed to post it so bear with me. We have been married for 16 years and still relatively young at 38 (at least we think so). We have had a lousy marriage for most of our marriage. We didn't really fight per se, we just got into the habit of ignoring each other. That lead to terrible resentment on both our parts. My husband is a rare man in that he has to feel an emotional connection in order to want sex. Since we didn't have that he didn't want it. We had sex once every 4 months or so and he rarely jerked off. As he put it "I killed his sex drive". When we would have those rare moments of sex or sex related activities I would not let him cum in my mouth but I did when we were dating, often. I think in my own way I was "punishing him" for ignoring me. Not sure. He in turn got it in his brain to never cum in my mouth.
Now our relationship is a trillion times better. We both made an active decision to renew our marriage. It was January of 2009. He sat me down and told me he felt a lack of connection with me and he was thinking of divorce. We both agreed to work on us and we have ever since. Our marriage is better than ever. I look forward to seeing him, being with him, hugging him and making love with him. He feels the same way too. We make a total effort to make each other feel special, loved and adored. We have also been in marriage counseling for a year and we continue to go every week.

So here is my worry/question....we have been having sex regularly ever since. Nearly every night. And now the truly embarassing part....when I give him a bj he cannot cum. Not at all. I know he wants to but he cannot. For nearly a year we have tried but he cannot. I have told him that I want him to and that now I am in the place of loving him and the act. He is really trying and it pains me to see him so distressed over it. It has now gotten so bad that he sometimes gets soft when I go down on him. I think fear has gotten the best of him. What the hell should I do? I think he feels pressure from me but I don't know what to do about it. For example: two nights ago I wanted to go down on him and he stopped me and said no let's have sex instead. Today when I asked him why he is avoiding that he said he didn't know but thought that I work too hard and it wouldn't happen and that it would make me feel bad. Thoughts? In truth I do feel bad. Really bad. I was the one who stopped this long ago and the one who put this in his head not to. I don't know what to do. We have tried everything. I won't go into details but we have tried. He is now also having difficulty with masturbating on my body. It is almost as if he trained himself to only cum inside me. He has no health issues at all. None. Great shape, loves his job, not depressed in any sense and on no medication....all the things I would attribute to this. Is it me? That is my fear. Thank you for reading and I apologize in advance if it is too much. Any input is more than welcome.


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## Deejo (May 20, 2008)

So to be straight here, is your concern that you feel guilty about his condition and want to make amends?

If you are being intimate, both physically and emotionally - he is getting what he needs.

As for the oral orgasm, the more of a priority it is for you - the more anxious he will continue to be. 

Conditioning is a powerful thing.


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## MrsInPain (Feb 5, 2010)

I'm just going to play the Devil's Advocate here. Please don't take ANYTHING personally! I'm just trying to help.

Have you changed your oral techniques at all since you were dating? Meaning... do you think you still do it as good? Honestly, just a question.

The issue you bring up about the emotional part of it is, as I understand, an important part in sex for your H.

However, maybe there are still a few things you can try. Maybe try taking taking a different approach to giving him a BJ. Maybe some role-play, or new tricks? Do some online research and experiment. 

I know this is really personal but have you tried some not-so-conventional stuff? Like for instance my H goes CRAZY for ball-play (as in testicles) during oral sex. I mean licking them, or lightly grazing my fingernails on them, licking under them, etc. Have you guys gotten that playful?

Maybe you can play some fun games like blindfolding him then going down on him. Or perhaps build it up a little bit, kissing his stomach first and etc. 

Just trying to help. Hopefully I didn't gross you out too much! =)


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## steve71 (Feb 5, 2010)

It could also be that, at 38, hubby is just a little less physically sensitive than in earlier years - or, to put it another way, now needs more vigorous stimuli like energetic intercourse?


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## Rob2380 (Dec 21, 2009)

A few thoughts come to mind here. I suspect he's clearly got an issue with allowing himself to orgasm when you go down on him. You also say that you are having sex almost every night. It may be that he needs this extra amount of physical stimulation to reach climax. Assuming there's no problem with his erection when you try to please him with your mouth, it may be necessary for you to introduce some other sensation during the act. You might use your hand on his shaft in conjunction with using your mouth. That will create more friction. You might also use a finger to stimulate his perineum and do external prostate massage. This can be very powerful for a man. Try using your hands to bring him to climax, then when he's reached the point of no return, take him in your mouth. Bet once he's done it, and if you reassure him how good it was for you to be able to please him that way, his hangups over it will fade.


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## Rob2380 (Dec 21, 2009)

I posted this answer in the other forum where this post originated:
A few thoughts come to mind here. I suspect he's clearly got an issue with allowing himself to orgasm when you go down on him. You also say that you are having sex almost every night. It may be that he needs this extra amount of physical stimulation to reach climax. Assuming there's no problem with his erection when you try to please him with your mouth, it may be necessary for you to introduce some other sensation during the act. You might use your hand on his shaft in conjunction with using your mouth. That will create more friction. You might also use a finger to stimulate his perineum and do external prostate massage. This can be very powerful for a man. Try using your hands to bring him to climax, then when he's reached the point of no return, take him in your mouth. Bet once he's done it, and if you reassure him how good it was for you to be able to please him that way, his hangups over it will fade.


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## chuckf75 (Sep 6, 2009)

I have often had trouble cumming while receiving oral and the stress of trying made it impossible sometimes. Now my wife is fantastic, she looks up and smiles at me and says, "I don't care if you ever cum and I will do it all night". She just takes all the pressure off and then I can often get off. OK, my wife loves giving BJs and her mouth never gets tired but this is what works for us. Take the pressure off, both decide it doesn't matter and see what happens!


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## toolate (Sep 22, 2009)

chuckf75 said:


> I have often had trouble cumming while receiving oral and the stress of trying made it impossible sometimes. Now my wife is fantastic, she looks up and smiles at me and says, "I don't care if you ever cum and I will do it all night". She just takes all the pressure off and then I can often get off. OK, my wife loves giving BJs and her mouth never gets tired but this is what works for us. Take the pressure off, both decide it doesn't matter and see what happens!


Thats right! I would keep it off the table or say something like I like going down there whether or not anything happens... keep it simple and he will let you know if he feels ready someday to open that up again. If you want him to go down on you but he is scared bc he doesnt want you to reciprocate ask him what you can do instead... maybe just go right into sex for a while... see what his answer is.:smthumbup:


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## momof6girls (Jan 11, 2010)

not sure if this helps at all.. but i have been married 20 + years and i am 40 and he is 45 and i let him cum in my mouth and nothing went bad, you know you do have kids and life and stuff that gets mixed in but other than that sex ok... 

well about a year ago i could tell you it was a surprise when he went soft... in the middle of it.. yep.. shocked me and him and well since he just can't stay hard and i to have tried all different ways... and he still enjoys a bj but i know he will get soft and i do it anyway... (you have to have time) he says still feels great just soft??? so i do my thing then he does his on me and by then he is semi hard again and we get into sex... 

so what i am saying just because he is soft he still may enjoy it... just work it in different order so you can have your cake and eat it to... ok corny..


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## Amplexor (Feb 13, 2008)

Not unusual for some men to have a more difficult time in cumming during a BJ. My self included. My guess is he has a head case right now. (Sorry for the bad pun  ) I agree with Chuckf, take the pressure off and give it time. He is likely making this hard on (Oops sorry again) himself an is creating a self fulfilling prophecy. 

Here are a couple of threads discussing technique, likes, dislikes,.... Maybe find some ways to change it up a bit. Good luck.

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/sex-marriage/10132-tips-bjs.html

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/sex-marriage/6708-need-tips-giving-best-bj-ever.html


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## cody5 (Sep 2, 2009)

I'm guessing you want him to cum in your mouth for his, not your sexual pleasure. Kudos for doing that for him. But if it IS for him and he prefers vaginal stimulation, then go with vaginal stimulation. 

My wife will gladly give me a BJ for ME, and I'm not going to decline. But I prefer vaginal intercourse and so does she, so that's what we do. Sometimes oral is "necessary" and she'll do it, (and boy, can she sell it. She's good at it, but I digress) but we go back to vaginal sex when the time allows. 

If you both like regular sex, than go with it. Daily? What are you complaining about? I'm SURE he's not.


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## Therealbrighteyes (Feb 11, 2010)

Again, thank you all for your replies. I think some of you touched on my expectations and such. I think I am making a bigger issue out of this than him. Frankly, he is so happy to have reconnected with me and us having a wonderful sex life. Perhaps I am pushing too fast? I feel tremendous guilt and the "conditioning" of him. Maybe I am doing this to relieve my guilt? Not sure.


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## Therealbrighteyes (Feb 11, 2010)

Cody,
Ha ha. Your daily comment made me smile. Yes, nearly daily. I posted on the sex forum that I think I am hung up on this because of guilt I feel. He certainly is happy. He has told me numerous times that he is thrilled with our new sex life. I am having the time of my life but also conflicted. I "conditioned" him to be this way and I feel awful about it. Not sure what to do now. Just let it go and let time take its course?


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## Scannerguard (Jan 26, 2010)

We had this discussion the other day, my gf and I.

Are you sure he wants to release in your mouth? Or are you projecting?

Honestly, I'd rather give on oral sex than receive. I woudn't really care if I ever got it again (well, I may miss it a little). It's hard to cum for oral sex for me because I am more of a "shaft" guy than a "head" guy. He may be like me that way so it really means the woman has to get 2/3rds of the way down - a "tall, thick" request  

It's fine for foreplay (love it actually) but I'd rather devote most of the oral sex for her.

Just saying don't overproject and be good about receiving. It's frankly more important for the female because isn't something like 94% of female orgasms clitoral?


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## Therealbrighteyes (Feb 11, 2010)

Okay, sorry for the blush but your comment made me blush. " It's hard to cum for oral sex for me because I am more of a "shaft" guy than a "head" guy. He may be like me that way so it really means the woman has to get 2/3rds of the way down - a "tall, thick" request". 
Yup, I do all of it. In fact he says repeatedly that my techniques are wonderful. All the way down, you name it without getting into tmi. He just cannot. God, I feel like a *****. I caused him to be this way and yet I am the one who is now putting pressure on him to perform. I can tell he is stressed to the max now when I do this. So much so that he avoids it. So much so that he avoids "going downtown on me" because he worries that I will feel the need to reciprocate. He actually told me that. So I thought just lay off it all. Take it slowly. Yet he admitted today on the phone that he thinks about it all the time. That he has fantasies about it. Gah! I don't know what to do. God I love this man. I really do. Thoughts?


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## larniegrl (Oct 7, 2009)

Yes...move on. The more you fixate on this, the more of a problem it will become. Just focus on having fun, and if the moment arises where it will work to "go down" on him (without pressure on anyone)...do it.


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## jgn2112fletch (Feb 5, 2010)

Brennan said:


> Okay, sorry for the blush but your comment made me blush. " It's hard to cum for oral sex for me because I am more of a "shaft" guy than a "head" guy. He may be like me that way so it really means the woman has to get 2/3rds of the way down - a "tall, thick" request".
> Yup, I do all of it. In fact he says repeatedly that my techniques are wonderful. All the way down, you name it without getting into tmi. He just cannot. God, I feel like a *****. I caused him to be this way and yet I am the one who is now putting pressure on him to perform. I can tell he is stressed to the max now when I do this. So much so that he avoids it. So much so that he avoids "going downtown on me" because he worries that I will feel the need to reciprocate. He actually told me that. So I thought just lay off it all. Take it slowly. Yet he admitted today on the phone that he thinks about it all the time. That he has fantasies about it. Gah! I don't know what to do. God I love this man. I really do. Thoughts?


Hi Brennan...I think you're doing a fantastic job of trying to help and empower yourself to take care of your H's needs. Not all of us are as fortunate as your H. I have never liked oral sex. In my entire life I've never been able to cum from oral. But lately, I've really wanted it badly. This might be because my wife wants absolutely nothing to do with me sexually though. My suggestion, for whatever it's worth (which might not be much), is to just ignore it for awhile. Don't even bring it up or just brush it off like it's nothing. Try having sex in a position where you're in control...like on top or something. Make sure you know when he's going to cum. And after he starts to cum get off of him and give him oral as a surprise as he's cumming. And I'd say whatever you do, at this point, make it seem as though you're loving every drop of it. I don't want to make it sound ****ty, but as some have pointed out, I think he has a complex about it. Seeing you down on him, loving every bit of it, even if his cum is all over your face...to see you getting a tremndous thrill out of giving him oral while cumming...and all COMPLETELY BY SURPRISE, may do the trick. It might take a couple of times doing this by surprise.
Just my two cents...my hat's off to you for trying so hard. Like I said, I wish I were as lucky as your H.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

Congratulations on the Re-connecting, that is the Beautiful thing here! We all go through struggles sexually, you are so eager to please, that is wonderful ! When we've been married for so long, I think we all have some guilt for things we should have done in the past. Good that we realize where we have went wrong, but so important that we work through in letting the past go, and focus on the here & now. 

I was a once a week -wife when it came to sex for about 20 yrs, only cared to give him a BJ for a bribe, so I had some guilt too. And I wanted to make up for things too. So I understand where you are coming from here. My insaitable zeal to please him now & get him off every time - has also caused my husband to struggle with some Performance Anxiety! It isn't always just young guys! He also has some hang ups about watching me do oral on him. 

Sounds like this is a combination of some Performance Anxiety, some hang ups about ejaculating in your mouth & maybe even just too much sex (for allowing the oral to be sensitive ENOUGH). 

For example, my husband can have an orgasm from Oral but NOT if we had sex every night. He is 46. I would have to wait a day or two for this to work, just something I have noticed with him, so I reserve those times when I am on my monthly - to do this for him & bring him to orgasm. But he CAN ejaculate nightly with intercourse. So every man is different. 

I know you said you did this regularly when you & he was younger, unfortunetly as men age, the sensitivity & the male hormones wane a little, or alot since those younger days. Men generally need MORE stimulation as they age, so getting him off orally may be more of a challenge. 

For the time being, put aside the guilt , enjoy the togetherness in the ways that are exciting for him, and I am sure, in time, you can ease all of this back into swing.


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## Nekko (Oct 13, 2009)

Enjoy whatever you're doing. You've made such great progress that i have no idea why you don't simply enjoy the marriage and the sex and that's that. As for his cumming during bj's, he'll have to at one point in time, figure out for himself, that it's ok to do that. Probably somewhere at the back of his mind, he associated cumming with something he shouldn't do. Since training the body to do something over time works (otherwise we'd all still be peeing ourselves) his is responding to what it was programmed to do...not cum. So yeah, just let it go, eventually ask him to relax during bj's (because he's probably feeling a bit more tense than he should) and if it starts happening great. If not...you already have an awesome marriage and sex life. Treasure it.


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## Chris H. (Jan 27, 2007)

[merged duplicate threads]


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## diaxis (Feb 20, 2010)

Rob2380 said:


> Try using your hands to bring him to climax, then when he's reached the point of no return, take him in your mouth. Bet once he's done it, and if you reassure him how good it was for you to be able to please him that way, his hangups over it will fade.


This.

You need to re-associate the orgasm itself with the perception that you desire his "stuff". You might even surprise him with this the first time. If he thinks you enjoy the experience it will heighten his orgasm, but you might need to trick him in order to reduce the performance anxiety.

Another problem might be this : hands provide better frictive force, and it might be more stimulating than a mouth, especially a lazy one.


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## Dryden (Jan 5, 2010)

If he's associating cumming with only intercourse, then my suggestion, IF you are comfortable doing it, would be to have regular intercourse until he's just at the point of no return. Then just as he's about to climax, get him into your mouth. At that point, there's pretty much no way for him not to come and it could start the association of climaxing in your mouth being OK.

Also, using the hand or hands as an extension of the mouth when performing a BJ I find to be key. The added friction/pressure really helps.


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## Happyquest (Apr 21, 2009)

A few things come to mind. One stop trying to make him cum. Nothing worse than goal orinted sex. If I go down on the wife only trying to make her cum. It doesnt happen. She can since that all I am trying to do. Tell him that he better not cum without permission. Make him begin to think about trying not to cum. If I began to think I better not cum. well it starts to build and I cant even control it.

Here are some of my own experiences. Try a mouth full of hot coffee or tea. Not too hot but good and warm. The hottest mouth you ever felt is bring you pleasure. Ice cubes are counter productive for me. We like warm and the warmer the better. A sip of hot tea and then a BJ = feelings of heaven. :smthumbup::smthumbup:

2. If your very open minded and want to push is take off button. Its the prostate. Google prostate massage. Not for everyone but from what I read here. I think your open minded enough. It has good health benefits too. Its my go button if your giving me oral and massaging my prostate. I hope you can handle the truth. LOL

my 2 cents worth.


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## 63Vino (Dec 23, 2009)

I havent seen the thread starter respond in a while to this. BUT.
Id want to know if its technique or the mental part.
He may be embarrased to say that your particular technique cant get him there. I will tell you that a BJ is not a BJ.

meaning there have been some girls who could make your toes curl and others that you could just as well be reading the paper cause they have no idea what they are doing. Even if they do, the actual way the mouth glides over, how far in she can take it matters. Try to make sure he;s honest about what it is.
I "think" its the same for girls but sometimes it can actually feel a llittle ticklish (for lack of a better word) in which case your NEVER gonna cum. 

If it mental.. heck watch more porn.. almost every scene these days ends in the "cum shot"... after a few dozen of those maybe he wont think it too bad "desensitize" him. Maybe talk about the idea away form the bedroom.. "i wanna drink your cum" text messages and things like that.!!

And yea.. the relax thing is important.. make the goal sucking his life out though his penis.. NOT making him cum.


report back brennon... progress?


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## mike1 (Jun 15, 2009)

Dryden said:


> If he's associating cumming with only intercourse, then my suggestion, IF you are comfortable doing it, would be to have regular intercourse until he's just at the point of no return. Then just as he's about to climax, get him into your mouth. At that point, there's pretty much no way for him not to come and it could start the association of climaxing in your mouth being OK.
> 
> Also, using the hand or hands as an extension of the mouth when performing a BJ I find to be key. The added friction/pressure really helps.


:iagree:

I think if you can have sex until he gets to that point of being close to cumming then let him finish in your mouth that could work to re-condition him to associating your mouth with having an orgasm. Keep doing that and over time pull him out sooner and sooner so your blowing him for a longer period. Also when you're having sex, stop to blow him for a minute or two then resume intercourse. Gradually spend more time with him in your mouth then having intercourse. Maybe that will help things over time so he'll eventually be able to go start to finish in your mouth.


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## Therealbrighteyes (Feb 11, 2010)

Thank you for your responses. God, this is hard. We have tried to make progress but last night he couldn't even masturbate in front of me., with my mouth near his penis. I feel disgusting. He tried, he really did. When I asked him later what was going on he said that "associating my face with ejaculation" causes him the inability to stay hard. He said it is because he associated my mouth with conditioning. I moved away from his penis. He still couldn't and we were not able to have sex. Please help?!


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## 63Vino (Dec 23, 2009)

Brennan said:


> Thank you for your responses. God, this is hard. We have tried to make progress but last night he couldn't even masturbate in front of me., with my mouth near his penis. I feel disgusting. He tried, he really did. When I asked him later what was going on he said that "associating my face with ejaculation" causes him the inability to stay hard. He said it is because he associated my mouth with conditioning. I moved away from his penis. He still couldn't and we were not able to have sex. Please help?!


Penis and mind really ARE connected... go figure.
Does he want to do this?
Could you restate exactly what he thinks about this?
Its really one of the best forms of feeling your partner open to you.. God its nice.

Well STOP focusing on it. The self concsiousness is going to kill him. If its not necessarily something he's comfortable with AND he's standing there jacking off and your mouth is right there, sure its not going to happen.

How bout progressive step? Cum on you near your "hot spot" then stomach,, then chest. Tell him to cum on you is to love you. ))) hahahah

Seems definately a mind issue. I would also get him to see many cum shots. desensitize him.
I went though my entire 15 year marriage and my ex NEVER wanted to do this... and here is the opposite.. ARGH!!!

Take baby steps is what im trying to say i guess.. dont focus directly on end goal.

good luck... hope you get something to drink soon. o geez


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## destinygirl (Mar 7, 2010)

It looks to me as though his problem might be that he doesn't feel entirely comfortable.

The comment that he 'associates' ejaculation with your face badly, possibly means that he is afraid of dominating you or hurting you. I know that sounds weird. 

Perhaps you could try this article 'why men love blow jobs':

Why Men Love Blow-jobs :The Feminine Woman

it is (the article) to help women understand the reason behind men wanting blow jobs in the first place. Perhaps the problem is that you're not coming from the right place when you give him a blow job?

I'm sorry for your situation.


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## 20years (Mar 8, 2010)

Has your husband complained? If not don't sweat it. Life's a journey, not a destination. If he seems to be enjoying the BJ keep up the good work and when you get tired climb on top and enjoy intercourse together.


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## 63Vino (Dec 23, 2009)

While true... maybe she would like to be cummed on and in!

In which case... well you know.   and


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## 20years (Mar 8, 2010)

63Vino said:


> While true... maybe she would like to be cummed on and in!
> 
> In which case... well you know.   and


Well then there's more than one way to skin a cat. How about Mammary sex or a good old fashioned hand job? Those work for me and my wife has been uncomfortable with oral sex for years.


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## 63Vino (Dec 23, 2009)

Star said:


> I could add to this, but I'm going to behave for once


Oh why start NOW!?!?!?


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## 63Vino (Dec 23, 2009)

Star said:


> Erm, normally when I post YOU tell me to go away


No please... go right ahead.. I can take it today.


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

Brennan-

There is an easy way to fix this, let me know if you are still posting on this thread. I also need to know how old he is.


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## Flanders (Feb 26, 2010)

Let him giver on you between your legs and when he is close, pull out and start giving him oral sex, don't go slow be very vigorous like when you have intercourse and he will blow like old faithful.

Just one man's opinion. If that doesn't work take him to an asian massage parlor and get a professional to give him oral, take note of what she is doing and do the same to him at home.

I have recieved good oral and bad, so just work on your skills.

Good luck.


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## YasminTiaraMacDonald (Mar 10, 2010)

My relationship with my boyfriend is getting more intimate. I don't want to have intercourse yet (I'm a virgin), but I would try oral...


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## ran1976 (Apr 17, 2010)

You seems one of lovely wife, who takes pain for her husband's problem. At least you are trying everything you can, shows you love him a lot . As suggested in other post, ask your husband what acts he like the most, try to add new technique of BJ to your routine. 
After all If he loves you it should not be a concern. 

Good Luck


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## Kobo (May 13, 2010)

Haven't read the whole thread so SIAP. 

Go on a sex hiatus for two weeks, at least for him. Cuddle, Kiss, Touch but no Os. After the time off go down and he'll be ready to blow for sure. Good luck.


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

Jesus this is depressing.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Therealbrighteyes (Feb 11, 2010)

Why was my thread resurrected? Why, just why? 
Things are worse in the last week and I didn't need this reminder of when both of us were working at our marriage.


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## Kobo (May 13, 2010)

Brennan said:


> Why was my thread resurrected? Why, just why?
> Things are worse in the last week and I didn't need this reminder of when both of us were working at our marriage.


My bad. Didn't check the date. Hope things go better this weekend.


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## SaffronPower (Mar 6, 2011)

My husband started needing more stimulation by the time he was that age too to cum. I go down on him all the time but I haven't had spunk in my mouth for years. But we're having fun, nobody's complaining.

I think you need to relax. And stop feeling guilty.

RELAX RELAX RELAX


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## SaffronPower (Mar 6, 2011)

oh sorry didn't see this was old...was in the "new posts"


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## Troyman (Mar 13, 2011)

Do not worry about him not comming. I very much enjoy oral sex, but have I have never been able to cum from it. Not sure why, but I am always happy to finish more traditionaly


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## Fordsvt (Dec 24, 2010)

Amplexor said:


> Not unusual for some men to have a more difficult time in cumming during a BJ. My self included. My guess is he has a head case right now. (Sorry for the bad pun  ) I agree with Chuckf, take the pressure off and give it time. He is likely making this hard on (Oops sorry again) himself an is creating a self fulfilling prophecy.
> 
> Here are a couple of threads discussing technique, likes, dislikes,.... Maybe find some ways to change it up a bit. Good luck.
> 
> ...


Those BJ tips are great.
Try them out. Remember-it's all about visual too. Men are very Visual.


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