# I really need advice. Its long but to undrestand i had to give some background



## orangeivy (Aug 17, 2009)

Im 22 years old and a mother of two. I have a two year old and a one month old. I have been married for almost 3 years. We have been together though a total of 7. It started when we first began to date. We were dating 4 months into I lost my virganity to him, I then found out around the same time he was seeing an ex behind my back. I was so in love with him i forgave him. I was friends with an ex of his that was my first mistake. I was at work on night and he picked her up and wen to vote at the high school, He took her home and kissed her goodnite, a few weeks later i had to work after winning these tickets to see the premiere of SAW, he told me he was taking a good friend of his named alex. I worked even told him id call in he refused and said he wanted a "guys night" I worked got off worked and he was no where to be found. I called he said he was on his way...An hr later he shows up and told me he had car trouble and had to take alex home. I went to amanda(my friend his ex) and picked her up she was staying at my house. I was telling her how he wasnt acting right and i thought he was cheating again. I called him listened to her and was asking the questions she told me too. I jumped in the shower and went to bed. I then found out after finding a note hidin in his closet that he had amanda went to the movie and out to eat then he took her home and kissed her yet again, I found out that when i was in the shower she called him and told him what i had been saying and making things up telling him she wanted him...A few days later she went to his house and they had oral sex. I had no clue about this one.....until after i was married and 8 months pregnant with our daughter. Our senior year he had a band thing in Phoniex. He told me he didnt know what was gonna happen the 2 weeks he was there but wasnt planning on anything. He wanted to have a break while he was there. I told him if we break up even gfor the 2 weeks it was over for good. you only want a break when your planning on doing something. Hr told me he loved me and would be faithful. The day they left i recieved a phone call from a girl i didnt even know she told me he was kissing and everything with a freshman. he had told her i was a b**** and broke up with me that he liked her. Tons more happened but ill never really know...He came back after still dating her. Would call me and tell me he hated me. He loved her would even call her my nicknames. After a month he relized dating a 14 yr old at 18 wasnt so much fun..She wasnt allowed to watch pg13 movies... I was dating different guys and he called and would try to get back with me. After a while i went back...then he went to lincoln tech and cheated aghain while we were engaged. i went back to him got an apt, and got married and pregnant I then learned about the oral sex with amanda after we promised each other everything was out in the open. He told me if she hadent have told me never would have. We havent been the same since. we are always fighting and he has started to get controlling. If i need money i have to ask bc he has all the money...i have to tell him how much and what its for..he hated my family even though im really close with them and we live with my mom.his mom hates me said shed take my kids....Its sad to say but i stay bc i feel bad like its my fault or i did something...I have no job, car or home of my own, and he wont leave he says im over reacting. Since our son was born its gotten worse hes always yelling at my daughter shes 2 and into everything..and all we do is fight...
Please any advice would be helpful.


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## orangeivy (Aug 17, 2009)

I forgot to say waht i needed advice about...lol I dont know if i should leave him and how not feel guilty...


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