# Abstinence for bj's



## aimee21 (Jan 5, 2017)

Occasionally my husband will ask if we can not have sex for a week or so prior to asking for a bj. He also will ask if it's ok that he takes certain supplements that are designed solely to increase sperm production. I will usually agree and let him but was just curious if other men do this as well? My other sahm friends never heard of men doing this for bj. :surprise:


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## IndianApple (Mar 27, 2016)

Its quite normal.. though i havent used any supplements , but you need to ask him the reason behind he seeking help of supplements.


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## jorgegene (May 26, 2012)

never heard of it, but everyone has their own kinks.

does he explain why?

taking a wild guess, i would say he wants to build a lot of pressure (physically and sexually) so he can have a greater release.
also, it might be about male power. building his sperm count, unless he is trying to get you pregnant through PIV makes no logical sense except to
express his male power fantasy by releasing a large sperm count.

personally it strikes me a bit odd and selfish, but if it doesn't bug you and turns you on, then all good.


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## toblerone (Oct 18, 2016)

You can't take supplements to increase sperm count. He may be taking some to increase the volume of semen that comes out. Just needed to clarify that for you.

Dude probably saw porn and wants to shoot like male pornstars. It does sound like a power fantasy thing.


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## Leroi (May 13, 2016)

never heard of it as well.
I do the opposite: I never ask for a bj if we haven't had sex for a while, because my sperm can become too thick.

In any case I think it must be related to dominance, maybe he wants to put a mark on you


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## C3156 (Jun 13, 2012)

toblerone said:


> He may be taking some to increase the volume of semen that comes out....Dude probably saw porn and wants to shoot like male pornstars.


That is the only thing that came to mind, he wants to be able to pull out and shoot a huge load all over you (sorry if tmi). If he is the type to take a video, this is why.


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## aimee21 (Jan 5, 2017)

He has told me flat out before he likes to make his ejaculate large for oral sex. He says it's a visual turn on. The supplements he takes are to increase semen volume but zinc and folic acid does increase sperm production also. I'm just wondering if others do this because my sahm friends seemed horrified when I told them I let him do this.


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

Semen is only 1% sperm. More sperm won't be noticeable. The supplements can though affect the taste of the ejaculate.


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## TheMoon (Feb 3, 2016)

If you are both for the week wait and the big load, then who cares if it normal? Do your thing.


I would be more in the horrified camp only because there is no way I'm going a week without sex just so he can blow a bigger load for a BJ.


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## Spicy (Jun 18, 2016)

Never heard of this.

How *do you feel about it?*


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

I've never heard of this - fetish? I suppose abstinence for a week would make his orgasm more intense, though, and bj's tend to produce much more intense orgasms anyway (in my experience, at least). Intensity can often be increased by having a greater volume of semen, which may explain the supplements. However, he is mislabeling their effect, I think.

I wouldn't give up sex for a week just for a better bj - to me it seems like sacrificing too much for a small gain in one event! If he takes care of you orally during that week, then perhaps it's not a loss for you - if you care.


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## Middle of Everything (Feb 19, 2012)

jorgegene said:


> never heard of it, but everyone has their own kinks.
> 
> does he explain why?
> 
> ...


Agreed.

As long as it doesnt bother you, all good. 

Also dont bring your friends into your bedroom. None of their business.


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

Let me guess - he always wants to finish in your mouth. Its a common kink. Maybe more volume makes the kink better

I think there is no explaining kinks - they are almost by definition irrational.

If it doesn't bother you, then there is no reason not to play to his kinks as long as he is willing to do what you want in bed.


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## MrsAldi (Apr 15, 2016)

Maybe there is a porn term for what he's doing? 
I might ask my husband later. 

How do you feel about it? 
Does he return to favour with oral for you, or is he more concerned with his orgasms? 

Be careful discussing your sex life with your friends, if they're horrified instead of understanding and helpful, their judgement could work to make you feel ashamed. 


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## aimee21 (Jan 5, 2017)

Good points. My dh has always been very visual especially when it's for bj. I don't mind and he keeps me happy too. It just can be very difficult and nauseating when it is a lot built up, especially when I was pregnant. I just wasn't sure if this was a "thing" other men do to make getting a bj more exciting.


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## heartbroken50 (Aug 9, 2016)

uhtred said:


> Let me guess - he always wants to finish in your mouth. Its a common kink. Maybe more volume makes the kink better
> 
> I think there is no explaining kinks - they are almost by definition irrational.
> 
> If it doesn't bother you, then there is no reason not to play to his kinks as long as he is willing to do what you want in bed.


I don't have experience with the abstinence & volume side, but my H always preferred to finish orally. He would probably be happy without PIV or other activities at all. I read here on TAM about BJs as foreplay and it's difficult to relate. Every time I'd initiate BJ first, he would finish and I'd be left to my own devices. 

That said, every couple is different, and if you don't mind the abstinence and the kink makes it good for both of you, then go for it!


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

Wanting to finish with a BJ is fine, but I'd hope that he would then reciprocate. Its never right to leave someone to have to take care of themselves - at least without doing your very best for them first. 




heartbroken50 said:


> I don't have experience with the abstinence & volume side, but my H always preferred to finish orally. He would probably be happy without PIV or other activities at all. I read here on TAM about BJs as foreplay and it's difficult to relate. Every time I'd initiate BJ first, he would finish and I'd be left to my own devices.
> 
> That said, every couple is different, and if you don't mind the abstinence and the kink makes it good for both of you, then go for it!


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## IndianApple (Mar 27, 2016)

aimee21 said:


> He has told me flat out before he likes to make his ejaculate large for oral sex. He says it's a visual turn on. The supplements he takes are to increase semen volume but zinc and folic acid does increase sperm production also. I'm just wondering if others do this because my sahm friends seemed horrified when I told them I let him do this.




May be, he need to have longer BJ because if he ejacuate initially before u give him bj, he can enjoy for a longer period.. supplement will increase sperm count and am sure he must be feeling good to pump it out on you or ur face ...


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## heartbroken50 (Aug 9, 2016)

uhtred said:


> Wanting to finish with a BJ is fine, but I'd hope that he would then reciprocate. Its never right to leave someone to have to take care of themselves - at least without doing your very best for them first.




He would make half-hearted attempts... but gets what I call "BJ Brain"... frankly he'd be toast after a BJ and just not able to.



Over the years I adjusted...usually made sure I got one or two of my own first and then finish the way I know he liked. So if I initiated early with BJ it was because I wanted to give that to him unreciprocated.


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## Kivlor (Oct 27, 2015)

I have been known to take supplements to increase volume (Lecithin). I don't know about your H, but with me, I have had an issue for years where I will often have dry orgasms. It is not pleasurable. Whereas, when a larger volume is ejaculated, it is much more pleasurable. Now, I've never directly asked a girl to wait a week, but I've definitely avoided sex/masturbation for several days so that it will be far more enjoyable for me when it happens.


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## wantshelp (Mar 10, 2016)

In my opinion, I think it's great that the two of you are comfortable enough with each other that you satisfy each others' sexual desires and fantasies. It sounds like the two of you have no trouble communicating to each other what you want and you do it for your partner. That is great. I think it's a sign of a strong loving relationship where you are not keeping score. Perfect! 

I do agree with not letting friends tell you what you should or shouldn't do. Friends will only be able to project based on their life experience and it is likely different from yours.


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## PhillyGuy13 (Nov 29, 2013)

I don't know the answer but wondering. I understand the longer one goes between orgasms, the higher the overall volume. Is there measurable difference between going 3-4 days vs waiting a week? 

I know going more than once a day or every day the volume is noticeably less, but I'm thinking there must be a point where the volume maxes out.


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## Kivlor (Oct 27, 2015)

PhillyGuy13 said:


> I don't know the answer but wondering. I understand the longer one goes between orgasms, the higher the overall volume. Is there measurable difference between going 3-4 days vs waiting a week?
> 
> I know going more than once a day or every day the volume is noticeably less, but I'm thinking there must be a point where the volume maxes out.


Just speaking for myself, anecdotally, ~2 weeks, without supplementation, volume seems to cap out. I've never gotten out some measuring cups, and tested it, just going on visual / cleanup requirements. After 3-4 days with a lot of lecithin and I'm usually good for 2-3 strong, pleasurable, voluminous orgasms. Then it's back to waiting, or faking it. 

I don't think I'm a good source though, due to my admitted problem.


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## aimee21 (Jan 5, 2017)

I don't know about other men but if hubby waits 7 days compared to 2 it's a big difference. He seems to max out at around 7-10 days especially if taking supplements.


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## PhillyGuy13 (Nov 29, 2013)

I agree 7-10 days much more volumous than 2 days. 

Again just wonder maybe at 4-5 days he's at 90% volume of where he would be at 7-10 days. As long as the two of you are both happy, all good.

As far as BJs, much more intensive orgasm here than PIV. If I'm remembering correctly anyway


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## katiecrna (Jan 29, 2016)

If it doesn't bother you that's great. I bet If you look at his porn history it's a bunch of facials and cumshots. Your a very nice wife if you don't mind this. 
I find it disrespectful personally. How would he feel if you had a fetish for spraying his face when you orgasms, and you wanted to abstain from sex just so you could spray on him with more pressure and volume.


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## PhillyGuy13 (Nov 29, 2013)

katiecrna said:


> If it doesn't bother you that's great. I bet If you look at his porn history it's a bunch of facials and cumshots. Your a very nice wife if you don't mind this.
> I find it disrespectful personally. How would he feel if you had a fetish for spraying his face when you orgasms, and you wanted to abstain from sex just so you could spray on him with more pressure and volume.


I'd mark it on my calendar. With a Sharpie.


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## katiecrna (Jan 29, 2016)

It's crazy how sexuality is so different among one another. It's actually amazing how many fetishes there are.


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## TheTruthHurts (Oct 1, 2015)

Ok here's my take and your homework.

In my years on the planet I've opened many internet doors that I wish I hadn't, but you can't really unsee something once it's out there.

You might want to get hold of 3 different porn clips and watch then with him and see what he thinks. You can be direct or show him these along with others.

First bukkake - this is a big enough thing that you'll have no problems finding it. If this turns him on... it'll be obvious. This stuff you either like or quickly move on.

Second, I've seen 2 other types of porn in enough quantity to believe these are common fetishes.

The first one involves a girl / woman overwhelmed by size/volume and gagging, etc. Seems a lot of guys have a male dominance thing going on and live to see this. The more innocent or helpless - but willing and not forced - the better it appears.

The second involves women who just can't get enough of the stuff. The fantasy appears to be that the woman twiddled her fingers all day dreaming of a huge load. This is kind of a power sharing fantasy - she demands and he performs.

If he has one of these fantasies and you can narrow it down, you can probably really turn him on by playing your part. You seem very open to him which is why I suggest this. But as you can see - the roles are kind of opposite so knowing which one is important.

If it's the latter you might even mix your own batch (I'm sure google can provide a formula) and you can surprise him by doing whatever with your batch you want to demonstrate your extreme desire for the stuff. Frankly I think this latter fantasy might dovetail with a fantasy of you taking matters into your own hands - when he arrives and you have your stuff and concoct a story line about someone sneaking out the back just a moment ago - idk but that could be where he's going

Who knows but he has SOMETHING on his mind and he seems to be spending all week building to it, so...


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## aimee21 (Jan 5, 2017)

The visual I just had of that Katie had me peeing my pants! Lol!


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## PhillyGuy13 (Nov 29, 2013)

katiecrna said:


> It's crazy how sexuality is so different among one another. It's actually amazing how many fetishes there are.


Just having fun.


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## Fozzy (Jul 20, 2013)

Is it weird that I've never paid much attention to volume? I mean I know I can't fire one across the room anymore like when I was younger, but it's never really made me want to grab an eyedropper and start measuring.


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## katiecrna (Jan 29, 2016)

Some sexual fantasies are a complete turn off for the other person. So you want to keep him happy but not open Pandora's box. It depends on how much the fantasy bothers you, or excites you if you want to open that box or not.


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

That works, as long as overall thing are fair. 

Otherwise you need to get out the handcuffs and riding crop and make sure he does his job properly >



heartbroken50 said:


> He would make half-hearted attempts... but gets what I call "BJ Brain"... frankly he'd be toast after a BJ and just not able to.
> 
> 
> 
> Over the years I adjusted...usually made sure I got one or two of my own first and then finish the way I know he liked. So if I initiated early with BJ it was because I wanted to give that to him unreciprocated.


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## katiecrna (Jan 29, 2016)

My husbands one fantasy that I know about... when he starts talking about it during intercourse I literally start to dry up while he is in me and sex is sooo painful it has to stop. This is something I can't control. I guess I can use lube but that may or may not be handy when he gets to talking. Also it makes it obvious that I'm not into it if I need to stop to lube up. 
Damn fetishes and incompatibilities...


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## heartbroken50 (Aug 9, 2016)

katiecrna said:


> If it doesn't bother you that's great. I bet If you look at his porn history it's a bunch of facials and cumshots. Your a very nice wife if you don't mind this.
> I find it disrespectful personally. How would he feel if you had a fetish for spraying his face when you orgasms, and you wanted to abstain from sex just so you could spray on him with more pressure and volume.




Everyone has preferences... Safe, sane and consensual, right? If they both enjoy it, that just means they are sexually compatible.

I really think a lot of women enjoy these kinds of kink, but don't admit it because of the kind of reactions OP got from her friends. 

One of my closest friends is in a mostly sexless marriage...she dreads her H's birthday, their anniversary and Valentine's Day since those are their 3 sex days a year. It's a chore to her. She already thinks I'm a freak just for owning a vibrator, I can't imagine what she would think if she knew everything 



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## PhillyGuy13 (Nov 29, 2013)

Fozzy said:


> Is it weird that I've never paid much attention to volume? I mean I know I can't fire one across the room anymore like when I was younger, but it's never really made me want to grab an eyedropper and start measuring.


I think it's more noticeable if I'm... self-servicing... for a period of time compared to PIV. You can feel varying intensities but tougher to tell how much actual volume.


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## Fozzy (Jul 20, 2013)

The nerd in me needs to point out that theres a difference between a fetish, a kink, and a preference. With a fetish, you NEED it to get off.


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## aimee21 (Jan 5, 2017)

Very good points. We have watched blowbangs before and he really likes them. Especially where the girl is swallowing 9, or 10 loads one after another.


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## Fozzy (Jul 20, 2013)

Good gravy!!



Sorry, I'll show myself out


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## heartbroken50 (Aug 9, 2016)

uhtred said:


> That works, as long as overall thing are fair.
> 
> 
> 
> Otherwise you need to get out the handcuffs and riding crop and make sure he does his job properly >






Unfortunately we're each taking care of our own now, but that's a whole other story (and now 2 threads).


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## Lurkster (Feb 8, 2016)

As a guy who produces a large volume, I can understand the OP's apprehensions.... 
It was quite a while before my wife would do me to completion because of my volume when I O'd. 
YES, most us guys are visual beasts! (so are many women, including my wife)
YES, we like to see that stuff all over! That includes our wives drooling it all over..... No way to explain that...it's just how it is. 
YES, no release for a few days, and I know I fill up the tank, and will release more. No difference after 4 or 5 days though. 
Never heard of supplements. I assume he likes the visual, and has been reading or something? 

If it floats his boat, and the OP is OK with it....go for it! 
You both should do things for each other, and what is 'normal', is of little consequence. It's up to you two.....joint decisions.....


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## katiecrna (Jan 29, 2016)

I have watched porn with similar qualities... deepthroat, oral cream pie... things like male dominating the women. But doing it in reality... my husband would get his d*ck cut off if he tried some of the stuff I've seen lol


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

aimee21 said:


> I will usually agree and let him but was just curious if other men do this as well?


Abstinence play and ejaculate volume play might actually be more common than you think. Nothing to make your husband feel ashamed about. If anything you should be glad that he is open enough about this to discuss it with you. 

The abstinence part gets into the category of tease and denial. He wants to enjoy delaying this so that he can spend time _looking forward_ to this special moment. 

The supplements likely do not really help but instead have a placebo effect that _enhances_ him looking forwards to that special moment. 

In my opinion if such a topic interests you, you may want to discuss having sex without allowing him to orgasm as a way to focus on emotional bonding. There is a tantric style of this discussed here:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coitus_reservatus

This will allow you to engage in traditional lovemaking that is charged with this desire. If done playfully it can increase his semen volume as well for when he is ready to share that with you at a desired interval. 

Regards, 
Badsanta


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## aimee21 (Jan 5, 2017)

I think it's more of a kink. He doesn't ask for it all the time or need to do it everytime we are in bed. It's more like every other month or so and he will ask before he starts taking his little vitamins. The only time it was difficult for me was when I was full term pregnant.


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## katiecrna (Jan 29, 2016)

For me... things that I get off to while masterbating are things I would never do and like in reality. (Watching a girl deepthroat and gag is better than being the one who can't stop gagging and can't breath). This is probably because when your masterbating your enjoying just the visual. Also because masterbating is so sub par to actually being with my husband that I need a more extreme stimulus to orgasm when I'm doing it myself.


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## Lurkster (Feb 8, 2016)

aimee21 said:


> I think it's more of a kink. He doesn't ask for it all the time or need to do it everytime we are in bed. It's more like every other month or so and he will ask before he starts taking his little vitamins. The only time it was difficult for me was when I was full term pregnant.


So if it's not a requirement, which I believe is the definition of 'fetish', and you are OK with it.....why not? 

I do things that I know my wife likes, that are not on the 'man on top normal' way of doing things, by any stretch of the imagination. 
She does things for me, in the same not quite normal category. Again....why not. 
As long as it's not degrading to one of you, or gross....??


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## aimee21 (Jan 5, 2017)

No, not degrading at all or I would tell him. The only time it seemed gross was when I was very pregnant and I gagged from it easier.


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## Lurkster (Feb 8, 2016)

aimee21 said:


> No, not degrading at all or I would tell him. The only time it seemed gross was when I was very pregnant and I gagged from it easier.


Well....there ya go! I can understand the pregnant thing.....lots of things don't work then! 
Got something you'd like him to do for you? It's all fair! 

"Trade ya!"....could be an interesting question! 
(has been around us Lurksters!)


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## Middle of Everything (Feb 19, 2012)

Lurkster said:


> So if it's not a requirement, which I believe is the definition of 'fetish', and you are OK with it.....why not?
> 
> I do things that I know my wife likes, that are not on the 'man on top normal' way of doing things, by any stretch of the imagination.
> She does things for me, in the same not quite normal category. Again....why not.
> As long as it's not degrading to one of you, or gross....??


Trust me its gross. Just ask my wife. Pretty sure she would tell you about how semen is just another gross nasty thing that comes from your body like urine or feces.:banghead:


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## TheTruthHurts (Oct 1, 2015)

You're a good wife. ;

I've run into the blowbang when it's inserted into compilations or pmv videos. Not my thing but you are latching onto something if that's his direction.

That's definitely a domination fantasy where the girl is insatiable.

Frankly, if you start to act like you can't take the volume in his normal activity, you might be able to eliminate the drama of the abstinence period. He seems to think he has to initiate the fantasy by building volume but it's the setting and response that's the turn on.

In my opinion, as Board Certified Doctor Of Porn (due solely to the passage of time), this is all about you bowing down to his awesomeness because you need it and want it. Frankly you can role play this anytime you want. And if you take charge of the role play unexpectedly it could be a huge turn on. Maybe script it out and watch a few of those videos to see what they're saying - the specific words used might be what is exciting. IDK

Just some random thoughts. Funny how graphic we can be with strangers, but I'm really glad you are reaching out and getting ideas to interject some freak into your marriage.


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## She'sStillGotIt (Jul 30, 2016)

aimee21 said:


> No, not degrading at all or I would tell him. The only time it seemed gross was when I was very pregnant and I gagged from it easier.


This guy is such a selfish pig.

He can't even respect his extremely pregnant wife and the discomfort you're already dealing with 24/7 because he needs to fly his freak flag or God forbid, the earth will stop spinning.

Disgusting.


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

aimee21 said:


> No, not degrading at all or I would tell him. The only time it seemed gross was when I was very pregnant and I gagged from it easier.


If you knew a surefire way to make your orgasm longer lasting and more intense, you'd do it, right? That's what your husband is doing, so why not, eh? It's no different than "edging" or doing a 1-2 week "sex reset" to increase intensity and desire. You seem to be into it, so who cares what friends think?

I was really sensitive to taste and texture when I was pregnant. I literally couldn't complete a BJ properly (swallow) without being nauseous until after the birth.


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## Capster (Jun 10, 2014)

So I assume he's either jacking into your mouth like a porn or giving a facial? Because if as you say "it's a visual thing" then he must see it coming out, unlike a regular CIM BJ. For my wife, I'm always worried that it's too much for her, so I kinda do the opposite.


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## TheTruthHurts (Oct 1, 2015)

Anyone have any idea what average volumes even are? W says I have large volume so she won't go to completion but IDK she's just not into it. But who knows?

Is 8 oz a lot?


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## Middle of Everything (Feb 19, 2012)

TheTruthHurts said:


> Anyone have any idea what average volumes even are? W says I have large volume so she won't go to completion but IDK she's just not into it. But who knows?
> 
> Is 8 oz a lot?
> 
> ...


Uh thats 2/3 of a can of pop or beer. LOL.


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

Thats completely normal, just like a 14" penis.






Middle of Everything said:


> Uh thats 2/3 of a can of pop or beer. LOL.


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## Mr.StrongMan (Feb 10, 2016)

aimee21 said:


> Occasionally my husband will ask if we can not have sex for a week or so prior to asking for a bj. He also will ask if it's ok that he takes certain supplements that are designed solely to increase sperm production. I will usually agree and let him but was just curious if other men do this as well? My other sahm friends never heard of men doing this for bj.


. 

You're husband is lucky to have you.


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## TheTruthHurts (Oct 1, 2015)

uhtred said:


> Thats completely normal, just like a 14" penis.




Fwew! I told her the pain and gagging were HER issue all along and she was just being a wimp. Thanks for the clarification @uhtred


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## 55pedro1989 (Jan 7, 2017)

For me is totally different 
I have already a big load and its disturbing .
I don't have any fun to finish orally for me its soooo disrespecting specially if you will kiss after or next day )))
But the BJ still the fun after shower for some minutes also .I go down end her in condition I need to don't speak nothing like that she like .
For me if she speak its turn me crazy ..
About the load sometimes big sometimes no I don't take nothing I think some kind of fruits or fish make difference ah juses avocado and dry fruits nuts ...

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## aimee21 (Jan 5, 2017)

No need to be attacking and name calling @Shestillgotit. I have a loving husband who when we do these things tells me over and over that I don't have to. I've never been coerced, begged, or made to feel guilty if I didn't feel like it and many times I have said "No". Maybe you had experiences in the past that left this anger to oral sex within you but I was merely curious if other couples have heard of this.


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## IndianApple (Mar 27, 2016)

I truly agree with aimee21 


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## Buffon06 (Aug 14, 2016)

I have told my wife many times that the intensity and enjoyment of my orgasms has a lot to do with volume of my ejaculate. The more volume and the number of "squirts", the more intense my orgasms are. My wife likes me to pull out and shoot my load on her (a$$, breasts, sometimes on her face and in her hair, but almost never in her mouth). In fact, sometimes she will be disappointed if my volume of semen is small, or if it dribbles out instead of shooting (most of the time I can pull out of PIV and reach her face/hair).

One of the most intense orgasms I ever had was after three weeks of forced abstinence. I had a thrombosed dorsal vein of my penis (the big vein on the top of the shaft), and the doc said no PIV or penis action of any sort for three weeks. When I was able to have PIV again, my wife was on top of me, she got her orgasm very quickly, and decided to finish me off orally. When I came, she aimed it up towards me, and shot a really massive load all over my chest and face. The orgasm was so intense it felt like my penis was being turned inside out!

So I will sometimes abstain from ejaculating for several days to intensify my orgasm, whether it is from a BJ or PIV. More water seems to be the best way to increase volume. I tried Lecithin a few times, but it didn't seem to increase ejaculate volume very much, but it did dramatically increase the amount of pre-cum, and sometimes caused my penis to "leak" pre-cum during the day, which was not good. I was taking Lecithin during a trip to Miami several years ago, and we spent a lot of time nude in the company of other nude people, and the nearly constant flow of pre-cum from my penis was very embarrassing.

OP, as long as you and your H are OK with him abstaining for oral, I say good for you and don't worry what your friends think about it.


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## Phil Anders (Jun 24, 2015)

I get the volume issue related to deferring orgasm for a few days, but I'm not understanding how that translates into a need to "abstain from sex". Why not have sex but stop short of ejaculating during the "build-up"? That way you aren't deprived for the week, and he develops useful control & gets to build his anticipation of the "big finish" (which I'm sure you could work into the pillow talk quite effectively). Win-win, no?


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## TheTruthHurts (Oct 1, 2015)

Phil Anders said:


> I get the volume issue related to deferring orgasm for a few days, but I'm not understanding how that translates into a need to "abstain from sex". Why not have sex but stop short of ejaculating during the "build-up"? That way you aren't deprived for the week, and he develops useful control & gets to build his anticipation of the "big finish" (which I'm sure you could work into the pillow talk quite effectively). Win-win, no?




Ha ha younger guys - many guys actually - will think you're crazy. But it's an interesting idea


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