# I have a key to his office door



## Billyray (11 mo ago)

I suspect my wife is cheating. The other day I discovered a new key on her car key ring. I used to re-key locks, and I noticed that the key pattern is quite unique. I've never seen this pattern. I suspect a particular person, and I have only circumstantial evidence as to her cheating or not. I am VERY tempted to go to his office and try the key in the exterior door. If in fact it opens the door, I then have proof of what I suspect. I'm scared to do this for two reasons: I could be arrested for Breaking and Entering, or if it won't open the door and my wife finds out, it would totally destroy our 36 year marriage.

I have tried to broach the subject on two different occasions, only to be verbally rebuked, and very strongly I might add. She does not know I made a copy of the key. We had a blow-up the other day, and I am now sleeping in a different room. My daughter talked her into getting joint marriage counseling yesterday. I have been going to counseling for many months now, sometimes on a weekly basis. Up until yesterday, she had always refused any type of counseling, even it were counseling just for herself.

I am at my wit's end with this. I feel that by trying the key in the lock will at least give me some closure. Right now with no definitive proof I am in constant agony trying to deal with this mentally. What should I do? Should I try the key?


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## Benbutton (Oct 3, 2019)

Does she work with this person? If the key fits the door what exactly is that going to prove? What is this evidence you speak of? Id hold off and give us more detail, it would be much easier to help you out. You might also receive much better advice than what you are currently thinking of doing.


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## Talker67 (Apr 7, 2016)

if you simply turn the key in the lock, but do not open the door and immediately leave, i suspect you will be fine. 
just expect there to be cameras watching the door and parking lot...so park your car a few blocks away, and cover your face.


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## Cletus (Apr 27, 2012)

Knowing exactly which door this key fits is uninteresting if she isn't willing to tell you herself what it is for.


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## re16 (Oct 9, 2012)

Maybe hire a PI?

If you are trying to catch her at this, do not confront with partial information, stay quiet until you have the evidence.


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## re16 (Oct 9, 2012)

What other things have made you think she might be cheating?


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## ArthurGPym (Jun 28, 2021)

Hire a P.I. But it sounds to me like she’s checked out. Your marriage was probably over long ago and you were never privy to it.


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

Well. You could say, “Hey wife, what’s this key for?” and see what she says before you consider B&E.


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## Beach123 (Dec 6, 2017)

What if it’s not to his office door? What would benefit her having a key? If he’s there - she wouldn’t need a key.

My worry would be that they have a place rented where they meet. Hire a PI and find out what she’s doing that’s making you suspicious. If you don’t trust he - she’s probably not going to tell you what the key goes to.

If it looks odd - could it be a key to a mailbox? A safe deposit key possibly?


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

Beach123 said:


> What if it’s not to his office door? What would benefit her having a key? If he’s there - she wouldn’t need a key.
> 
> My worry would be that they have a place rented where they meet. Hire a PI and find out what she’s doing that’s making you suspicious. If you don’t trust he - she’s probably not going to tell you what the key goes to.
> 
> If it looks odd - could it be a key to a mailbox? A safe deposit key possibly?


If I were a sneaky cheater, I wouldn’t put my F buddy’s hookup key on my key ring when my H was a locksmith… she must be some kind stupid if that’s the case. That’s why I think he should just ask her and see what her reaction is.


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## Billyray (11 mo ago)

This guy is her chiropractor for over four years now. She has a standing appointment every week. That means that this guy has physically touched my wife over 200 times. A little over a year ago I had a lady tell me that she was told that my wife was cheating on me. She would not name the source of the information, nor would she name the person having an affair. This past April I had to be out of town for 11 days straight for a federal trial. It was during that time that there began eight texts in one day. Normally she gets a text at exactly 6:58pm the night before, which is an automated message asking to confirm her next appointment. Then that next morning she receives two texts at the same time. I have seen these, and they are all automatically generated.

However, that week in April was the very first time there were ANY texts between them. The eight texts were on April 14, the next string of multiple texts were on April 20th. The eight texts on the 14th I describe in detail what I suspect, but do not know for sure (BTW... I was able to gather this information from our cell carrier's website with my account):

8:55am text in (in is from Chiropractor) Left home to drive to his practice (a 25 minute drive)
9:12am call out to her mother while driving 17 minute duration
9:21am text out notifying arrival at his practice (driving duration 26 minutes)
9:25am two texts in (standard reply from his office)
9:25am text out acknowledging receipt
9:39am text in asked to come into office (Covid required wait in car until time to come in) total wait time in car 14 minutes
10:05am, daughter calls in to my wife. This was 26 minutes after her arrival. I suspect that sometime between 9:39am and 10:05am my wife propositioned him, asks him to call her later if he decides to take her up on it. (More on why I suspect this later).
10:29am, text in I suspect he said yes. During 10:05am and 10:29am she was either already home or driving back home to change clothes.
12:21pm he texts saying everyone in his office is out to lunch (office lunch time is from 12pm to 2pm... two hours).
12:21 text out says she is on her way to his office
12:34pm call out while driving she calls her personal physician's office, call duration 13 minutes. I suspect she was driving to his office.
12:46pm a call in from her physician's office, duration 12 minutes.
Total elapsed time from leaving house and arrival to his office is 25 minutes.
2:59pm call out to an 800#
Six weeks before April 14th she received her first ever testosterone injection to help her with her lack of sexual desire. On my last night out at trial Tuesday April 20th (coming home the next day), we talked that evening via FaceTime. She was EXTREMELY horny. Never in our 35 years together has she displayed anything like this. She even sent me two photos of her, one with her breasts, the other full frontal naked in front of a mirror. That next morning on my way home (six hour drive), she sent me two texts, one asking if I "pleasured myself" last night, the other saying that she "pleasured herself" last night. She also said she could not wait for me to get home. That whole week after I came home she was all over me. Later that next week she said all of that was a direct result from the testosterone. I almost forgot...right around April 25th I noticed there were no tabs open on her iPad. This is very unusual. Normally there are many open, for she shops online quite a bit. The next day while she was still asleep I opened up the web browser on her phone. There were several windows open on Pornhub. I took several screen shots and texted them to her and said that we need to discuss this. Later that day she didn't offer to say a thing. When I brought it up she only said "that was not one of my proudest weeks." That's all she ever said.

After sex, she always takes a mild antibiotic as she is prone to infections. Early last December I was at our pharmacy, and I requested both our records for every prescription for the entire 2021. I noticed that on April 22nd (the day after my arrival back home) she picked up three antibiotic pills (not the usual 30). There were at least 20 pills still left from her previous fill date. Sometime early May she informed me that her doctor had switched antibiotics for her. The new prescription was written on May 7th, and filled on May 25th. Our normal sexual routine is every Friday night. That said, she still had many pills left from her previous fill date. At the time I did not think too much of it.

5/7-surgery for hysterectomy, six weeks before any sex (that would be 6/18)
6/1-(her birthday), three texts in, one text out
6/2-two texts in
8/9-(his birthday), one call out
6/19-Saturday one text in, one text out, one text in
6/23-Three texts in, one text out
6/24-two texts in
6/28-one call out, two texts in, one text out
6/29-two texts in
10/21-one text in, one text out.
10/22-two texts in, one call out
10/25-three texts in, one call out
10/27-one text in, one text out
10/28-two texts in, one text out, three texts in
12/10-one call out
12/13-two texts in, three calls out
12/14-one text in, one text out
12/15-one text in, one text out, one text in

When she finally ran-out of her previous antibiotic, she kept the pill bottle on her dresser. It never moved for several months. One day we were both upstairs and I grabbed the bottle and asked her why she was keeping it around. Her reply was pretty sheepish-I caught her off guard. Later that afternoon she made it a point to throw it into the trash.

She calls him by his first name, and not Dr. XXX. One time she talked in detail about his family, particularly his wife (said she is homely). I asked her why she knows so many details about him. I forgot what she replied, but I know I caught her off guard with that.

One time while having sex, I commented her on her large brea***. She replied "I know". I thought that was very odd. She seemed very proud of that.

Here are my replies to comments made previously... 
Benbutton, I cannot really say by trying the key what it will prove. If I had to guess it would be that she does not really love me nor respect me. She knows I take several medications for depression, bipolar, and anxiety. Along with that there is the many sessions of counseling. That is what would most hurt me is that she has let me suffer with this for so long.

Talker67, that is what I am unsure about. I, like you think that simply inserting the key and trying to turn it, then removing the key but not opening the door is much safer than opening the door. Also, I would make it a point to try this during normal business hours.

Cletus, as of right now she does not know that I have a copy of the key.

I appreciate all of your comments so far.


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

Billyray said:


> This guy is her chiropractor for over four years now. She has a standing appointment every week. That means that this guy has physically touched my wife over 200 times. A little over a year ago I had a lady tell me that she was told that my wife was cheating on me. She would not name the source of the information, nor would she name the person having an affair. This past April I had to be out of town for 11 days straight for a federal trial. It was during that time that there began eight texts in one day. Normally she gets a text at exactly 6:58pm the night before, which is an automated message asking to confirm her next appointment. Then that next morning she receives two texts at the same time. I have seen these, and they are all automatically generated.
> 
> However, that week in April was the very first time there were ANY texts between them. The eight texts were on April 14, the next string of multiple texts were on April 20th. The eight texts on the 14th I describe in detail what I suspect, but do not know for sure (BTW... I was able to gather this information from our cell carrier's website with my account):
> 
> ...


Okay! Get a PI. Go out of town for a weekend and let her know ahead of time. Put the PI on her that weekend. No need to try out keys, she will just gaslight and blameshift anyways. 

Then you can destroy them both.


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## Billyray (11 mo ago)

Beach123 said:


> What if it’s not to his office door? What would benefit her having a key? If he’s there - she wouldn’t need a key.
> 
> My worry would be that they have a place rented where they meet. Hire a PI and find out what she’s doing that’s making you suspicious. If you don’t trust he - she’s probably not going to tell you what the key goes to.
> 
> If it looks odd - could it be a key to a mailbox? A safe deposit key possibly?


Beach123, it is a Kwikset brand key. It is not a safe deposit box nor mailbox key. The reason why I suspect they meet there is that his office door is in the back of the building. I think she leaves out the front door after her appointment and goes in the back door. Since she has an iPhone, I am able to track her movements in real time via the FindMy app. She goes in the front door, then immediately to an examination room for about 8 minutes, then goes to the center of the building. The center of the building is where she puts these electrodes on her shoulders to massage her neck. This lasts for about 20 minutes. After that, I see her either exit the front of the building, or mostly exit the rear of the building right in the middle. There are three doors on the back of the building, an office on the left, a center door with a wheelchair ramp, and a door on the right which is his office. Many times I have tracked her at this back exit door, then spend about a half hour in the vicinity of his office. Overall she is there just over an hour. I think that she waits for him to come into his office between patients.


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## Billyray (11 mo ago)

QuietRiot said:


> If I were a sneaky cheater, I wouldn’t put my F buddy’s hookup key on my key ring when my H was a locksmith… she must be some kind stupid if that’s the case. That’s why I think he should just ask her and see what her reaction is.


QuietRiot I am not a locksmith. I worked for a building supply company 30 years ago.


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## Billyray (11 mo ago)

QuietRiot said:


> Okay! Get a PI. Go out of town for a weekend and let her know ahead of time. Put the PI on her that weekend. No need to try out keys, she will just gaslight and blameshift anyways.
> 
> Then you can destroy them both.


QuiteRiot I think she has broken it off with him. He told her several weeks ago that he has stage 4 liver cancer (for some reason I do not feel sorry for him).


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## Beach123 (Dec 6, 2017)

So have the PI see what she is doing when she’s at the back of the building. I wouldn’t go in his office by using that key.


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## Billyray (11 mo ago)

re16 said:


> What other things have made you think she might be cheating?


re16 see my lengthy diatribe above


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## Billyray (11 mo ago)

I failed to mention that she changed Chiropractors a few weeks ago. This was due to his liver cancer. He cannot practice anymore since he is on pain meds. His business partner is a rather petite woman, and is not strong enough to treat her. Also, she has agreed to joint marriage counseling. Do you think it would be prudent and reasonable to show her the key while in a joint counseling session?


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## thunderchad (12 mo ago)

Go through her phone. Put a GPS tracker on her car. Or hire a PI.


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## Billyray (11 mo ago)

QuietRiot said:


> Well. You could say, “Hey wife, what’s this key for?” and see what she says before you consider B&E.


QuietRiot your advice is very good.


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## Billyray (11 mo ago)

thunderchad said:


> Go through her phone. Put a GPS tracker on her car. Or hire a PI.


ThunderChad I am reluctant to go through her phone. One reason is that it is ALWAYS in her pocket, or it is on her dresser while she is asleep. The other reason is that if she were to discover me doing that, it would destroy our joint marriage counseling effort. Regarding the GPS, I know that the iButton (if that is what the name is) made by Apple will alert the person that there is a tracking device that has been actively tracking you for some time. Is there anything else out there? Also, what good does it to attach one to her car? What would you suggest?


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## Billyray (11 mo ago)

I know this may sound naive, but what would be on InstaGram that may be evidence? I have never used it, nor have it on any device I own. I guess I could check to see if she has the app. I just do not know what could be discovered.


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

Billyray said:


> I failed to mention that she changed Chiropractors a few weeks ago. This was due to his liver cancer. He cannot practice anymore since he is on pain meds. His business partner is a rather petite woman, and is not strong enough to treat her. Also, she has agreed to joint marriage counseling. Do you think it would be prudent and reasonable to show her the key while in a joint counseling session?


Son of a *****. Well. In that case your only option is to try to get the truth of what happened. You’d have to be ready to lose your wife if you want to go that route. If she was cheating… then no big loss. So if you don’t have any proof via her iPhone and cloud to the actual conversations or texts… polygraph.

See what her face looks like and what she does when you ask what the key is for. That might give you more reason to put down an ultimatum. I.e. Tell you everything about her doctor, and take a poly. Or divorce. There is no reason to be communicating with her chiropractor that much, and if someone already tried to warn you before? Yeah, she is a cheater.


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## Billyray (11 mo ago)

QuietRiot said:


> Son of a ***. Well. In that case your only option is to try to get the truth of what happened. You’d have to be ready to lose your wife if you want to go that route. If she was cheating… then no big loss. So if you don’t have any proof via her iPhone and cloud to the actual conversations or texts… polygraph.
> 
> See what her face looks like and what she does when you ask what the key is for. That might give you more reason to put down an ultimatum. I.e. Tell you everything about her doctor, and take a poly. Or divorce. There is no reason to be communicating with her chiropractor that much, and if someone already tried to warn you before? Yeah, she is a cheater.


QuietRiot, if it has to resort to a polygraph, then our marriage truly is already over. I would not subject her to that... it is not worth it at that point.


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## Billyray (11 mo ago)

QuietRiot said:


> Son of a ***. Well. In that case your only option is to try to get the truth of what happened. You’d have to be ready to lose your wife if you want to go that route. If she was cheating… then no big loss. So if you don’t have any proof via her iPhone and cloud to the actual conversations or texts… polygraph.
> 
> See what her face looks like and what she does when you ask what the key is for. That might give you more reason to put down an ultimatum. I.e. Tell you everything about her doctor, and take a poly. Or divorce. There is no reason to be communicating with her chiropractor that much, and if someone already tried to warn you before? Yeah, she is a cheater.


QuietRiot, up until the first week of November 2021 when I first confronted her she deleted EVERY text between them. It was only after that she left them on her phone. But, she could have only left the ones that pertain to actual appointments, and deleted any that were incriminating.


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## Talker67 (Apr 7, 2016)

during normal business hours, when it is already unlocked, if nobody can see you, would be perfect to try the key in the door. No one can accuse you of Breaking And Entering if the office is staffed and open at the time, i like that idea

it would be like a smoking gun. no doctor is giving his patient a key to his office.

If it does fit the door, then i would hire a PI to get the info on her and him, and then try to get his license to practice revoked.


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## jlg07 (Feb 24, 2017)

I do think a P.I. is the way to go here. It will get you proof with no exposure to you getting in to hot water.


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## Rus47 (Apr 1, 2021)

Billyray said:


> I suspect my wife is cheating. The other day I discovered a new key on her car key ring. I used to re-key locks, and I noticed that the key pattern is quite unique. I've never seen this pattern. I suspect a particular person, and I have only circumstantial evidence as to her cheating or not. I am VERY tempted to go to his office and try the key in the exterior door. If in fact it opens the door, I then have proof of what I suspect. I'm scared to do this for two reasons: I could be arrested for Breaking and Entering, or if it won't open the door and my wife finds out, it would totally destroy our 36 year marriage.
> 
> I have tried to broach the subject on two different occasions, only to be verbally rebuked, and very strongly I might add. She does not know I made a copy of the key. We had a blow-up the other day, and I am now sleeping in a different room. My daughter talked her into getting joint marriage counseling yesterday. I have been going to counseling for many months now, sometimes on a weekly basis. Up until yesterday, she had always refused any type of counseling, even it were counseling just for herself.
> 
> I am at my wit's end with this. I feel that by trying the key in the lock will at least give me some closure. Right now with no definitive proof I am in constant agony trying to deal with this mentally. What should I do? Should I try the key?


Personally, I wouldn't do what you mention. Too many ways for you to get in a ton of trouble. Am not even sure about laws regarding unauthorized copying of key. Is turning a copied key in a locked door breaking and entering? In my uneducated mind it is. Since you used to re-key locks, assume you know the laws. But if you go down this road please be very sure of the risks as compared to the very small reward. Possession of a key to the bosses office was pretty normal for an administrative assistant (or even a direct report) when I was working. The desks were keyed differently and not given to anyone else besides security. Nothing nefarious at all.

IMO you ought to just hire a PI to get the goods (or not) on both of them. Stop playing at being detective and hire a real one. Tell the PI your suspicions, a few hours of surveillance by an expert ought to be pretty simple unless his office is the only place she is doing him. Your gut is giving you all of the 'proof' you really need. A PI ought to be able to give you more proof than you actually want to know.

Also, go see three attorneys with your suspicions, solicit what your options are and decide which one you are going to retain. You can deliver any damning evidence from the PI directly to the attorney.


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## wmn1 (Aug 27, 2014)

PI her. Don't break and enter. Being married for 36 years means you are about 60 years old or so and don't need the criminal charge. Use other ways or surveillance. It is sad that this may be the case after 36 years of marriage. That is the time you should be enjoying retirement and your wife but it sounds like she may have broke. I don't get these "I'm 60' and feel the need to cheat stories. It is disgusting and problematic. It is also unfair to you, not just the cheating, but how late in life it is and robs you because of stolen time, emotions and finances. You can't grow old and be happy with a cheater who is actively in the affair or a cheater at all. It robs you of your comfort zone. 

Hire a PI, get the info you need, keep in touch with the good people here and make hard decisions decisively


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

Billyray said:


> QuietRiot, up until the first week of November 2021 when I first confronted her she deleted EVERY text between them. It was only after that she left them on her phone. But, she could have only left the ones that pertain to actual appointments, and deleted any that were incriminating.


So right there. That is proof she is untrustworthy. She wouldn’t have deleted anything unless there was something to hide. At this point I’d move the burden upon her to prove to you she was NOT cheating on you. She should be glad to give you anything and everything you need to make that happen. I have to say a polygraph and taking her phone to a IT person to see if anything can be recovered, with her cooperation, is what I would accept. Nothing less.


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## BeyondRepair007 (Nov 4, 2021)

Billyray said:


> then our marriage truly is already over


@Billyray you keep referring to the devastation caused if you do certain things. Like trying the key and she found out, or trying the polygraph, or checking her phone.

I have to ask, given the amount of evidence you have, isn't your marriage already in severe jeopardy?
It seems pretty clear that something major is going on and you have plenty of reason to be suspicious.

Are you prepared to walk away from this unless you find hard video evidence of infidelity?
Could you live like that in your marriage? Could you trust her?

My opinion is that if you have reasonable evidence of infidelity, take the necessary steps to find out, even the risky ones.
You need to get to the truth, be it yes or no.
If she finds out you're checking and goes nuclear, I would say that adds credibility to your case.

Honestly good luck with this. You're in a tough spot.


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## QuietGuy (Aug 31, 2021)

I like the suggestion to use a PI, but it sounds like the affair may be over due to his health issues, or do you think it is still going on? I would suggest that you find out if the key is for his office. If it is, it then be interesting to ask her about the key to see if she lies about it.


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## thunderchad (12 mo ago)

If she deleted stuff she's obviously hiding things. I don't see any issue with going thru her phone while she's sleeping. Or, just take while she's awake and say "I have a bad feeling and I want to check on a few things." If she say fine, then you know she's probably not hiding anything. If she freaks out, you have your answer.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Billyray said:


> I failed to mention that she changed Chiropractors a few weeks ago. This was due to his liver cancer. He cannot practice anymore since he is on pain meds. His business partner is a rather petite woman, and is not strong enough to treat her. Also, she has agreed to joint marriage counseling. Do you think it would be prudent and reasonable to show her the key while in a joint counseling session?


 Do not show her the key. Whether or not the key is related to her cheating, she will deny it is. Cheaters lie. You won't find out anything useful and you will tip her off that you might have some solid evidence.

Her calling her doctor by his first name means nothing. I've called just about every doctor I've ever had by their first name. It's very common.

You could try the key at his clinic. If you do make sure you can't be identified on the security cam video. Also, you could trigger an alarm.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Billyray said:


> Also, what good does it to attach one to her car? What would you suggest?


Then you would know where she was going. For example, if they have a secret place/hotel/etc to meet, you'd find out that she's going there. If she disables the tracking on her iphone, you'd have a secondary way to track her.

You need to hire a PI. For some time now you have been going round and round about all this and not getting the evidence you need to prove or disprove your suspicions.


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

Does anyone really need over 400 chiropractor appts? Seems excessive. 
What did she say when you asked her about the key?


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## Wolfman1968 (Jun 9, 2011)

What about a VAR under her seat of her car? You need to do it PROPERLY (see Weightlifter's sticky note).


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Billyray said:


> Also, what good does it to attach one to her car? What would you suggest?


Then you would know where she was going. For example, if they have a secret place/hotel/etc to meet, you'd find out that she's going there. If she disables the tracking on her iphone, you'd have a secondary way to track her.

You need to hire a PI. For some time now you have been going round and round about all this and not getting the evidence you need to prove or disprove your suspicions.


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## Zedd (Jul 27, 2021)

if he thinks the affair is over due to the potential AP's cancer, a PI isn't going to help a lot.


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## GG1061 (Apr 20, 2021)

QuietRiot said:


> Well. You could say, “Hey wife, what’s this key for?” and see what she says before you consider B&E.


She has rebuked him and he is now sleeping separately. She doesn’t seem to be interested in talking about anything related to the matter. This raises suspicion, hence the key copying. Besides, who looks at their wife’s keys? I don’t. That in itself will set off her defense alarms.

Besides, I think B&E is not applicable here. Especially if he only checks if the key works and there is video evidence. Trespassing may be the more applicable offense and might be worth that to get more truth.


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## Talker67 (Apr 7, 2016)

getting the PI to figure out where the key fits....might be smart, as everyone points out. no way for you to end up in the slammer. i hereby change my recommendation


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## Jeffsmith35 (Apr 8, 2021)

Billyray said:


> I know this may sound naive, but what would be on InstaGram that may be evidence? I have never used it, nor have it on any device I own. I guess I could check to see if she has the app. I just do not know what could be discovered.


Instagram has a DM (direct message) function where people can communicate. Useful to see what's in there, although there are many other ways to communicate (pinterest dm, whatsapp, snapchat, etc.).


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## Jeffsmith35 (Apr 8, 2021)

If she has an iPhone, you can look at significant locations to see where she frequently goes.


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## Erudite (Jan 28, 2015)

I think this is a bunch of baloney. There is no way, I repeat no way, that the pharmacy gave the OP her records. None. Let me repeat that..NONE. Doesn't matter if they are married. And even if they did give him a list, they certainly are NOT handing out copies of the prescriptions, without her say so. Nope. Nope nope. And he happens to be a locksmith, federal trial blah blah, phone records.. what is this man KGB??? Sigh.


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## ThatDarnGuy! (Jan 11, 2022)

Billyray said:


> Beach123, it is a Kwikset brand key. It is not a safe deposit box nor mailbox key. The reason why I suspect they meet there is that his office door is in the back of the building. I think she leaves out the front door after her appointment and goes in the back door. Since she has an iPhone, I am able to track her movements in real time via the FindMy app. She goes in the front door, then immediately to an examination room for about 8 minutes, then goes to the center of the building. The center of the building is where she puts these electrodes on her shoulders to massage her neck. This lasts for about 20 minutes. After that, I see her either exit the front of the building, or mostly exit the rear of the building right in the middle. There are three doors on the back of the building, an office on the left, a center door with a wheelchair ramp, and a door on the right which is his office. Many times I have tracked her at this back exit door, then spend about a half hour in the vicinity of his office. Overall she is there just over an hour. I think that she waits for him to come into his office between patients.


Exactly what does this prove other than she is at work and moving around the building,?

Have you ever talked to a counselor to see if you might have some kind of problem with anxiety? And I am not saying this to be a smartazz. But you are tracking her movements in the building she works at.

I can tell you that if she found out you are doing this. She probably will lose all respect for you. I have seen many cases where the spouse tracks another spouse. But I have never seen where a spouse is tracked in the building they work. Women get really turned off by this level of anxiety.... This is deep mistrust.


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

GG1061 said:


> She has rebuked him and he is now sleeping separately. She doesn’t seem to be interested in talking about anything related to the matter. This raises suspicion, hence the key copying. Besides, who looks at their wife’s keys? I don’t. That in itself will set off her defense alarms.
> 
> Besides, I think B&E is not applicable here. Especially if he only checks if the key works and there is video evidence. Trespassing may be the more applicable offense and might be worth that to get more truth.


Her behavior is suspicious for sure. I think she should have the responsibility of proving her innocence at this point considering all her suspect actions.


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## ThatDarnGuy! (Jan 11, 2022)

QuietRiot said:


> Her behavior is suspicious for sure. I think she should have the responsibility of proving her innocence at this point considering all her suspect actions.


I believe his behavior has gotten out of line. Who tracks and becomes suspicious of their spouses movement at their job? Makes a copy of a key and seriously considers breaking the law and sneaking into the building to see what it might fit? This will probably lead to her losing her job.

If my spouse acted like this, I wouldn't engage in conversation either. I would feel that no matter what I said, it would be viewed irrationally with more suspicion. In fact, I would be searching the home for hidden cameras, microphones, etc. I would then say you either get mental evaluation and treatment, or I see no future together. 

I feel its completely out of line how some of you are encouraging him to go to this building and see if the copied key fits anything. 
This


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

QuietRiot said:


> If I were a sneaky cheater, I wouldn’t put my F buddy’s hookup key on my key ring when my H was a locksmith… she must be some kind stupid if that’s the case. That’s why I think he should just ask her and see what her reaction is.


Yeah!!


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## gaius (Nov 5, 2020)

QuietRiot said:


> Well. You could say, “Hey wife, what’s this key for?” and see what she says before you consider B&E.


Putting a key in a door and turning it isn't breaking or entering. If it doesn't work it doesn't work, and if it works he can just relock it and leave. But he won't even do that. That's too dangerous.

At this point you've been allowing another man to put his hands all over your wife for years, probably even picking up the tab and paying him for it. And now that she's done everything but tattoo "I'm a cheater" on her forehead you do nothing. Too scared to try the key, don't want to look through her phone. So full of fear and inaction I'm surprised she hasn't brought this guy over and banged him in your bedroom while you were sleeping. You'd probably just go back to bed if you heard them. And she knows that.

I've had the police called on me 4 times in my life and been escorted off the premises by them twice. And I wouldn't change a thing. Don't live your life in fear. It's a big waste of time. Get off your butt and do something.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Billyray said:


> QuietRiot, if it has to resort to a polygraph, then our marriage truly is already over. I would not subject her to that... it is not worth it at that point.


I think a polygraph is a very bad idea for the reason you do and for other reasons. When they do these polygraphs, you are usually allowed only 2-3 questions. They have to have yes/no answers. These tests are not reliable. I've seen posts from a lot of people who had their spouse take the test and it comes out negative. Btu then, they know that polygraph tests often return a false negative. So, even with the test they still feel that they don't know if their spouse cheated. It seldom turns out to be helpful.


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

Billyray said:


> QuietRiot, if it has to resort to a polygraph, then our marriage truly is already over. I would not subject her to that... it is not worth it at that point.


Then you’re going to have to let it go… you won’t get info off her phone, you won’t get a polygraph, you won’t question her. So what’s left? The affair is over… you have no options now. Testing a key at his workplace will still prove nothing to you whether or not it works.


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## Trident (May 23, 2018)

Erudite said:


> There is no way, I repeat no way, that the pharmacy gave the OP her records


Yes, that would be a HIPAA violation for sure. Sheds doubt on the credibility of the entire story.

He also seems to have a heck of a lot of free time to track her movements around the chiropracter's office.. and in reality the iphone tracking feature is not nearly so accurate as to find a person's exact location within a building. Especially time and time again within such a small area.


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## hairyhead (Oct 30, 2015)

Tell her to go to an Osteopath.

Chiropractors are over charging charlatans.


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## No Longer Lonely Husband (Nov 3, 2015)

This story has some holes…..


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## Robert22205 (Jun 6, 2018)

You have a record of her visits. 
Do you have access to her credit cards or checking account?
Does she pay for the visits (or are they free?)?


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

My initial thought here would be to pay a visit to liver cancer, chat him up a bit, and then just ask him point blank. This would work better if you can refrain from smashing his face in but since he’s probably dying anyway that is perhaps made easier.

I know a guy who works in that profession who is rumored to be banging many female clients, many married ones.


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## Chaparralredux (Apr 21, 2021)

Billyray said:


> I know this may sound naive, but what would be on InstaGram that may be evidence? I have never used it, nor have it on any device I own. I guess I could check to see if she has the app. I just do not know what could be discovered.


Check her phone bill for all the different apps she has downloaded. There are many apps with messaging features. 
So you think due to his illness the affair is over? His office is the only possible place she could be going for an affair according to her phone location? What about a neighbor or coworker?


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## ABHale (Jan 3, 2016)

Not breaking and entering if you have a key and only unlock and re-lock the door without going in. You could also go by during the day and see if the key locks it.


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## recovering2018 (Sep 9, 2021)

I'm not a locksmith either but have rekeyed many locks. The most common lockset I've rekeyed is a Schlage. The second is a Kwikset. That's because these are the two most carried brands by the big home improvement stores. 
The keys look very different, but the locks look different as well. Many times, the brand is inscribed right on the lock, and even if not, I can usually tell the difference by quick inspection. So this may be solvable without even trying a key. Just go look at the lock. If it's a Schlage, then you're barking up the wrong tree. If it is a Kwikset, then maybe you try the key.


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## re16 (Oct 9, 2012)

Did the key fit?


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## uwe.blab (May 2, 2019)

re16 said:


> Did the key fit?


If the key fit, do not acquit.


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## TAMAT (Jun 20, 2015)

BR,

What is the history of this Chiropractor, did he do this with other female patients, did you speak with the Drs wife?

If he is as reckless to have sex with a patient, then I would expect him to have done this before and to be good at concealing affairs.

I put Chiropracters in a category with Personal Trainers in that they have to keep their clients coming back to them through being charismatic, confident and making the client feel good about themselves. That leads to attachment, unlike doctors who tell you the facts as they know them and practice professional distance.

Can you contact the person who told you about the affair? You can pay her some of the money you would have paid a PI, as they say a gold hammer will bring down an iron door.

You should also monitor you WWs mood if he dies, my W wanted to see OM3 on his death bed but did not go when I said I would go with her.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Erudite said:


> I think this is a bunch of baloney. There is no way, I repeat no way, that the pharmacy gave the OP her records. None. Let me repeat that..NONE. Doesn't matter if they are married. And even if they did give him a list, they certainly are NOT handing out copies of the prescriptions, without her say so. Nope. Nope nope. And he happens to be a locksmith, federal trial blah blah, phone records.. what is this man KGB??? Sigh.


*MODERATOR NOTICE:*- He did not claim to be a locksmith, so you are wrong on that point. 

If you doubt the veracity of any other member on TAM use the report function. Calling them out in public is against the rules.


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## Erudite (Jan 28, 2015)

MattMatt said:


> *MODERATOR NOTICE:*- He did not claim to be a locksmith, so you are wrong on that point.
> 
> If you doubt the veracity of any other member on TAM use the report function. Calling them out in public is against the rules.


I understand, I will refrain in future but just to be clear I was using locksmith in the sense that it was his claim that he use to rekey locks. Which is a main function of a locksmith and hence how he came about his knowledge of the key being "wrong". I used locksmith prejoratively, not as a staement of fact.


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## ABHale (Jan 3, 2016)

hairyhead said:


> Tell her to go to an Osteopath.
> 
> Chiropractors are over charging charlatans.


It depends on the chiropractor. I found a great one. About 9 years ago I got up off the couch and couldn’t stand up. He worked on me off and on for 3 days. Serval hours each day. I was walking upright again by the third day. He only charged me $35.00.


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