# I might have crossed the line with a married woman :(



## Another Planet (Aug 8, 2012)

So now that I am almost divorced and back on the market I keep getting in trouble with married/involved women! I don't know if it's just me and how I am but this sucks. I am going to get shot or at least my ass kicked one of these days!

So it started with when I divorced my wife in March. I ended up a couple months after hooking up with an ex girlfriend that was kind of still in a relationship with her children's dad. That fizzled out after a couple months and then I went on vacation with my cousin and his wife and two other couples. Well nothing really happened then but we all hit it off and have stayed pretty close. 

Fast forward a couple months and I am going to one of the couples weddings in Iowa(I live in Michigan) which is actually where they all live but are all originally from MI. I am staying with my cousin for the wedding, well they have this neighbor that they are all really tight with...anyway she is married and her husband is a linesman and travels 11months of the year. The night of the wedding we all end up drinking a lot and I basically am with her the whole time and we hit it off. I really don't remember a lot but I guess I made quite the impression lol. I also can be maybe a tad flirty when drinking...I also do remember walking her back to her hotel room, walking in with her standing there for a second and telling myself no so I just turn around and leave.

So nothing happened then but the next day my phone is blowing up with FB friend requests from all these new people including her. Well we end up messaging on FB a bunch and I end up giving her my number to text and then we end up on the phone often. Well we probably have now discussed more then we should have, I learn she is very very unhappy in the marriage and she feels her life just wasting away. We both agree that we clicked but I have told her I can't do anything with a married woman. The phone talking and texts slowed after that maybe a couple times per week. 

Well now this last weekend they were all in town here for a wedding. Before hand I confront her to see how much everyone else knows before I might say something to get her in trouble and she says nothing, she has told no one anything about her unhappy marriage or me! I am just like wtf ok I guess I'll keep my mouth shut(which I suck at). 

So we are all out on the town the night before the wedding and I am able to play it down like I just kind of know her...I do get the vibe my cousins wife might know something is up. Anyway, somehow the next morning I end up with her hotel room key sitting on my kitchen table?! So here comes the wedding which I did not go to. She calls me later to chat and said she left the wedding early and is at her hotel. Well she flat out told me "I should come over I have her hotel room key anyway" but insisted on no one being able to know  
I told her I couldn't do that and that she should come here because everyone will be here sooner or later, and to me that was the only way I could guarantee nothing would happen. Well she never showed and I haven't talked to her since.
I actually feel bad because we really get along but I turned her down twice now and she is really unhappy and I really like her.....


----------



## SunnyT (Jun 22, 2011)

She's MARRIED. Period. Stay away.... far, far away.


----------



## Another Planet (Aug 8, 2012)

Yeah I know that is why I just can't do it.

There are others also over the years, this is just the current and worst. Now that I am basically divorced I feel like the inappropriate situations have increased. It is actually effecting my faith in monogamy and trust. Between what my wife did to me and the way married/involved women treat me my hope for this is dwindling.


----------



## Philat (Sep 12, 2013)

Another Planet said:


> Yeah I know that is why I just can't do it.
> 
> There are others also over the years, this is just the current and worst. Now that I am basically divorced I feel like the inappropriate situations have increased. It is actually effecting my faith in monogamy and trust. Between what my wife did to me and the way married/involved women treat me my hope for this is dwindling.


Take a look in the mirror and ask yourself what you are doing to get married women to "treat" you this way. Or are you a helpless victim of the predatory married female?


----------



## YupItsMe (Sep 29, 2011)

Another Planet said:


> It is actually effecting my faith in monogamy and trust.


There are plenty that do not deceive, cheat, lie etc. Pick better friends to spend time with. Birds of a feather...


----------



## CH (May 18, 2010)

It's never you, it's always them that causes these situations. 

Easy to fix the problem, don't flirt with married women. Problem solved, how hard was that.....


----------



## Another Planet (Aug 8, 2012)

Didn't know I was blaming anyone for my actions. I really didn't mean for it to come off that way.


----------



## Another Planet (Aug 8, 2012)

Philat said:


> Take a look in the mirror and ask yourself what you are doing to get married women to "treat" you this way. Or are you a helpless victim of the predatory married female?


LOL that is possibly the strangest thing I have ever heard. I am in business, I need to look decent. I am not going to purposely look bad just so women aren't attracted to me. Plus I consciously have changed my appearance and I just attract a different type.



YupItsMe said:


> There are plenty that do not deceive, cheat, lie etc. Pick better friends to spend time with. Birds of a feather...


I hope you are right. But I love my friends and wouldn't trade them for the world.


----------



## Another Planet (Aug 8, 2012)

Thank you all for your responses


----------



## Philat (Sep 12, 2013)

_LOL that is possibly the strangest thing I have ever heard. I am in business, I need to look decent. I am not going to purposely look bad just so women aren't attracted to me. Plus I consciously have changed my appearance and I just attract a different type._

Looking decent is one thing, this is another:

_The night of the wedding we all end up drinking a lot and I basically am with her the whole time and we hit it off. I really don't remember a lot but I guess I made quite the impression lol. I also can be maybe a tad flirty when drinking...I also do remember walking her back to her hotel room_

Takes two to tango.


----------



## ne9907 (Jul 17, 2013)

Another Planet said:


> So now that I am almost divorced and back on the market I keep getting in trouble with married/involved women! I don't know if it's just me and how I am but this sucks. I am going to get shot or at least my ass kicked one of these days!
> 
> So it started with when I divorced my wife in March. I ended up a couple months after hooking up with an ex girlfriend that was kind of still in a relationship with her children's dad. That fizzled out after a couple months and then I went on vacation with my cousin and his wife and two other couples. Well nothing really happened then but we all hit it off and have stayed pretty close.
> 
> ...


Bad dog!! Bad dog!! bad...!!!!!
I am sorry, I just felt like saying that

You sound like a dog who knows he is not suppose to **** inside the house but still does it!

As far as your married "friend" leave her alone. Or I may have to hit your head with a newspaper!


----------



## SunnyT (Jun 22, 2011)

Geez ne9907, he's going to think you are coming on to him. 

Then he's going to HAVE to hit on you...and it's all your fault. 

Married women suck.


----------



## SunnyT (Jun 22, 2011)

You make yourself available to married women... whatever the story. So you are as guilty as they are. 

IF your w cheated on you with an unmarried man... then he's a good guy who some guy's wife just jumped on???? Really?????


----------



## ne9907 (Jul 17, 2013)

SunnyT said:


> Geez ne9907, he's going to think you are coming on to him.
> 
> Then he's going to HAVE to hit on you...and it's all your fault.
> 
> Married women suck.


:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:


----------



## Another Planet (Aug 8, 2012)

Wow, okay then. 
I'm not some dog. The assumptions and insults just show your true colors not mine.


----------



## Another Planet (Aug 8, 2012)

I'm not looking for sympathy for sure...
I don't really know where to go at this point, mods can delete this whole thing I guess. It doesn't sound like it will help anyone out in the future.


----------



## ne9907 (Jul 17, 2013)

Another Planet said:


> Wow, okay then.
> I'm not some dog. The assumptions and insults just show your true colors not mine.


I am sorry, I thought it was funny, but I suppose my sense of humor is rather dry and only amuses me.

What I meant is that you know you should not do that but you keep doing it. Ask yourself why.


----------



## RClawson (Sep 19, 2011)

Of course it is helpful AP. You approached the line, you teased the line and you allowed yourself to be tempted to cross it but you did not. Thank God. Let's face it people most people in AP's situation would have hit it not once but both times. He did not.

In the meantime quit flirting with the married women. It is not like there are no single ladies your age that are attractive and eligible.


----------



## Another Planet (Aug 8, 2012)

OK then can you please council me on that! Seriously I know there is a problem, that is what I was trying to say. I don't want to be a threat to my friends wives and GF's...ahhh as stupid as that sounds!


----------



## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

I think this is a very informational thread and I hope you don't delete it.

Your original post is the way all affairs start.

I realize you aren't married right now but you were still a party to the beginning of an affair. In fact, that affair is probably still blooming because it is doubtful you will stop all contact with this woman.

That is why this thread is full of good information.

You, like all people in that position, feel like you weren't "looking for this" and want to deflect any notion that you have a responsibility in your own actions. It surprises you that others feel you DID have some responsibility there. That's the first line of the script. "It just happened, I never meant it to..." and the cheater actually still believes his or her own lie at that point.


----------



## Another Planet (Aug 8, 2012)

I have always had more friends that are girls then guys, it's just what happens.


----------



## Another Planet (Aug 8, 2012)

ne9907 said:


> I am sorry, I thought it was funny, but I suppose my sense of humor is rather dry and only amuses me.
> 
> What I meant is that you know you should not do that but you keep doing it. Ask yourself why.


ne I know, I was just looking for something else as a response....I'm cool with dry humor. 
I don't really understand this area of life right now. I'm 31 and was in a relationship for 10 years. AND I have always been completely faithful because it's very important to me.


----------



## ne9907 (Jul 17, 2013)

Once again, I am deeply sorry.
I am a bitter soon to be divorced woman, and your post sort of triggered me because my ex would typically say "they come onto me" "we are just friends" "they are married, you are being crazy" etc etc etc.

I should definitely not answer to post that trigger me. 

I am sorry


----------



## Another Planet (Aug 8, 2012)

ne9907 said:


> Once again, I am deeply sorry.
> I am a bitter soon to be divorced woman, and your post sort of triggered me because my ex would typically say "they come onto me" "we are just friends" "they are married, you are being crazy" etc etc etc.
> 
> I should definitely not answer to post that trigger me.
> ...


It's ok really  ... you are right you shouldn't talk to me lol but you are more then welcome to I would love to hear your input.


----------



## Another Planet (Aug 8, 2012)

Faithful Wife said:


> I think this is a very informational thread and I hope you don't delete it.
> 
> Your original post is the way all affairs start.
> 
> ...


OK you are right I will most likely not stop all contact with her. We get along very well. I think she is lonely and kind of chose me because I am not in her immediate group, I am 600 miles away but she still knows me because of how close she is to everyone else I know...but then again I think I just worked through something as I was typing...wow duh moment


----------



## Another Planet (Aug 8, 2012)

Wow I am so frkn stupid sometimes. After some thought yeah that's why she picked me out of any man in between her and I. I am so far away from her she could possibly get away with it...she doesn't like me! She likes the thought of me...damn talk about being dogged. I can be so stupid sometimes :/


----------



## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

Lesson learned. Affair avoided. What all did you learn?

(this is an excellent opportunity for self-reflection and increased understanding)


----------



## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Who cares? Its not your vows to keep, just hit it and go!

FW will probably kill me for recommending it but meh


----------



## Philat (Sep 12, 2013)

RandomDude said:


> Who cares? Its not your vows to keep, just hit it and go!
> 
> FW will probably kill me for recommending it but meh


Oh boy, let's not get into this again. Been there, done that.

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/mens-clubhouse/123593-why-do-men-hit-married-women.html


----------



## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

OP, married women hit on you because they are bored and you are a handsome flirtatious guy who probably seems both fun and safe. You're an ego boost. Most of them probably don't really want to cheat on their husbands with you. Some of them definitely do. But, if you don't want to be the Other Man in someone else's marriage, and subsequent divorce, you're going to have to take some responsibility for yourself. 

Stop flirting heavily, drinking heavily, and making bad choices, around other men's - particularly your friends' - wives. Lightly flirtatious in a general manner is fine, even flattering. But stop there. A few drinks with the group is fine. But stop there. Don't "find" yourself in the position of being a married woman's defacto escort for the evening. Don't "find" yourself in the position of being drunk and making out with a married woman. Don't "find" yourself in the position of being in a married woman's hotel room. You will manage not to "find" yourself in positions like that when you learn not to put yourself in positions like that. Learn about boundaries. If you don't want to sleep with your friends' wives, stop making decisions that create opportunities where that's not only possible but probable.


----------



## alexm (Nov 29, 2008)

This one's on you, and here's why:

You lead her on. You acted like you were interested (and maybe you were, at least in the attention you were getting).

Although her possibly cheating on her husband is not at all cool, it's actually 2 separate things going on here. There's her, making herself available. There's you, acting like you were available to her. Married or not, it's not cool to lead somebody on, especially if you have no intentions of anything happening from the start.

She may have not even been looking to do this, but your flirting and otherwise showing interest may have planted the seed. Or she may have been looking to do this, and because you showed interest in return, she set her sights on you.

I'm like you, a I get along better with women. My wife gets along better with men. It's just the way it is. Early on in our relationship, I established the "do not cross line" with how she interacts with men (99% of her co-workers are male). How some of the men she works with talked to her and treated her was inappropriate while she is in a relationship. To her it's how they've always been with her, and vice versa. There was never any intent on her part to lead them on (if she did), but the optics weren't good.

Because she's always been more friendly with men than women, she didn't quite see what I was talking about. To her, she was just being one of the guys (which is important when you work in a male-dominated profession). I understood where she was coming from, as I had once spent about a year working a job in which I was the only man. It automatically made me quite popular, simply because of my gender.

Initially, she didn't understand what I was trying to say, but eventually she started to see it. I basically told her that the way she responds to the sexual overtones of how some of those guys spoke to her, minimized our relationship, and emasculated me in the process. To her, it wasn't sexual at all, she was just being one of the guys and fitting in. To THEM, however, it was one indication after another that she was "available", and she enjoyed the attention. We guys will lap it up, even if we have no intentions of doing anything, as I believe most of her male counterparts were doing. They had no intentions of trying to bed her, they just liked that they could be flirted with in return. We could get into a whole big discussion of what's appropriate in the workplace (or even outside), but the point is, when someone, particularly a man, pushes the envelope and isn't shot down, it will continue. Especially if the response is what they are looking for. You did this, OP. The envelope was pushed, you responded in the way she wanted, she pushed farther, and on, until her hotel key was magically on your table. If this isn't an overt "**** me" signal, then what is? Her signals were returned to her in spades, until she was comfortable enough to do that. And that is on you, and you alone.

As far as I know, only one guy truly crossed the line with my wife, and she shut him down quick. He crossed this line while we were engaged, and he knew she was getting married. This did not stop him. I think this was an "ah ha" moment for her, as she assumed that if any of those guys ever got out of line, it would have been while she was single. This guy proved my point for me. I resisted the urge to say "I told you so", and she's since realized that her behaviour was part of the problem.

You fall into this category, OP. To you, it was harmless flirting, enjoying the attention, and even thinking it was only friendly. (a gross misjudgment, if that was the case.) She had other intentions, and it appears you did not quite read them, or believe that she would go that far.

You showed integrity by not following through with her offer, so good on you for that. But you showed little integrity or forethought about allowing it to get to that point in the first place. To her husband, if he ever finds out, this is an EA, even if you did not intend it to be, or even realize it was. He will hold you just as responsible as his wife. I don't think any of us married guys here would be happy with your behaviour, regardless of whether it was his wife who was pushing for this in the first place. You went along with it and enjoyed it.

Bottom line, married = the no zone.


----------



## Laurel (Oct 14, 2013)

Just a random thought - sometimes people have a habit of being attracted to the wrong people due to past experiences (picking unavailable people as a way to avoid getting too close emotionally, feeling like you deserve to be treated badly, etc.). Obviously, I don't know anything about what happened in your marriage or life, but maybe examine yourself to see if there is something in your subconscious that makes these types of women attractive to you since this seems to be a reoccurring pattern with you.

Anyway, the minute you find out someone is married, disengage. Do not text. Do not talk. Do not accept the FB friend requests. You may be tempted to continue on as "just friends." Don't. It is such a slippery slope. Emotional affairs are wrong too. This is someone else's wife. And stop feeling bad for these women when they tell you the sob story of how unhappy their marriage is, how taken for granted they are, blah blah. Every cheater has a variation of this story, making themselves into sort of a victim and justifying their bad behavior to themselves and you. If they are so unhappy, they should be talking to their husband about that, not you. Or getting a divorce and moving on. But a lot of these people are what we call "cake eaters," they like certain things the husband provides (money, lifestyle, etc.) but are bored or unhappy with other things. So they take the coward's way and cheat instead of addressing what is wrong.

And in the event you fall for your married lover and decide to be together (not likely as most cheaters don't actually end up leaving the spouse voluntarily), the chances of it working out are miniscule. Very few relationships that start as affairs last long term.

Basically, getting involved with a married woman just isn't worth it. Do you really want to be involved in breaking up a marriage/family? No, you don't know the husband, but think of how you would feel if it were you (karma and all that). And you can be sure whatever she tells you about him is full of lies/omissions/half truths (to make it seem somehow ok to cheat on him). Think of the innocent children who may be involved. Do you need the hassle of an angry husband coming after you? Being named in the divorce? Having your name and pic posted on cheaterville for anyone who ever googles your name to find? 

These women are just using you to feel better about themselves. They are craving attention. They are selfish. 

Don't waste your time on these people. If you are just looking for fun/sex (nothing wrong with that, especially after a painful divorce), there are plenty of single women out there that will be happy to provide this for you. And if you are looking for a relationship, there are plenty of quality single women out there for that too. Getting involved with a married woman is just asking for trouble (and if you willingly do this, you deserve everything you get).


----------



## thunderstruck (May 9, 2012)

Another Planet said:


> I have always had more friends that are girls then guys, it's* just what happens*.


It happens b/c you are a weak "man" who can't have close relationships with other men. Read No More Mr. Nice Guy.

Nothing wrong with you having a few female friends, but your close circle should be made up of guy friends, and not weak ones. You need a guy friend right now to smack you up upside your head with this married woman BS.


----------



## Another Planet (Aug 8, 2012)

I have read and own NMMNG. I am pretty sure I don't fall into the "Nice Guy" category. Maybe I'm wrong though, but if you talked to the people around me they would say otherwise lol

At one point I told her she needs to be talking to her husband not 
me, concerning her unhappy situation. She told me he does know...

She just posted this on FB and I am pretty sure it is directed towards me. Starting to look like I was suppose to take the fall for the whole thing. I might still who knows.....
"I don't know what has happened as I've gotten older! I've become so tolerant of disrespectful, dishonest inconsiderate, rude, self centered people that waste my time and really aren't even worthy of my patients at all.. WEll LET IT BE KNOWN... The girl I once was is back! Accountability starts by me telling you with no filter how it is..."

After reflecting on the past couple months she was definitely setting me up for this. Possibly this whole thing might have been produced for the one last night in the hotel. She outsmarted me...I am glad I held my moral ground and didn't let it go any further.


----------



## Another Planet (Aug 8, 2012)

Thank you all who have posted. 
I have not been on here for quite some time but it seems I am going to have to hang out here to get my head back. It is definitely a form of counseling.
Thank you all once again!


----------



## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

Another Planet said:


> She just posted this on FB and I am pretty sure it is directed towards me. Starting to look like I was suppose to take the fall for the whole thing. I might still who knows.....
> "I don't know what has happened as I've gotten older! I've become so tolerant of disrespectful, dishonest inconsiderate, rude, self centered people that waste my time and really aren't even worthy of my patients at all.. WEll LET IT BE KNOWN... The girl I once was is back! Accountability starts by me telling you with no filter how it is..."


Even if she were single, would you really want a grown woman who posts drama-queen stuff like this on her Facebook page? She sounds like a rebellious 15 year old. And whether or not it was directed at you, it's certainly a passive-aggressive swipe at _someone_. 

Oh, and stop Facebook stalking her. She's married. She wants to cheat on her husband _with you_. The way you signal that you don't want to be her OM is by stopping all contact with her. No drama, no confrontation, no final farewells. Just stop following her posts, emailing, texting, calling, and otherwise contacting her. If she contacts you, be busy or out or on a date, or just don't respond. 

Unless of course, you actually enjoy this sad little drama spiral you've (supposedly inadvertently) put yourself in with her? What need is this thing with her filling in you? Do you need the drama to feel alive?


----------



## ne9907 (Jul 17, 2013)

Never trust a woman who enjoys posting her drama ridden life on FB.


----------



## thunderstruck (May 9, 2012)

Another Planet said:


> After reflecting on the past couple months she was definitely setting me up for this. Possibly this whole thing might have been produced for the one last night in the hotel. She outsmarted me...I am glad I held my moral ground and didn't let it go any further.


Good. Now hopefully her H doesn't show up at your door with an alum bat.


----------



## Another Planet (Aug 8, 2012)

Rowan said:


> Even if she were single, would you really want a grown woman who posts drama-queen stuff like this on her Facebook page? She sounds like a rebellious 15 year old. And whether or not it was directed at you, it's certainly a passive-aggressive swipe at _someone_.
> 
> Oh, and stop Facebook stalking her. She's married. She wants to cheat on her husband _with you_. The way you signal that you don't want to be her OM is by stopping all contact with her. No drama, no confrontation, no final farewells. Just stop following her posts, emailing, texting, calling, and otherwise contacting her. If she contacts you, be busy or out or on a date, or just don't respond.
> 
> Unless of course, you actually enjoy this sad little drama spiral you've (supposedly inadvertently) put yourself in with her? What need is this thing with her filling in you? Do you need the drama to feel alive?





ne9907 said:


> Never trust a woman who enjoys posting her drama ridden life on FB.





thunderstruck said:


> Good. Now hopefully her H doesn't show up at your door with an alum bat.


This is actually the first of this type of stuff I have seen from her. She seemed pretty cool which is why I was attracted to her. This might have been just a blip anyway, but I can't say because I have only known her for a couple months. 

I'm not FB stalking her this came up in my newsfeed this morning lol 
I'll just have to put her on the back burner on FB, I think it would draw to much attention if I deleted her all together.

Yes I am now a little worried about the long term outcome. He is a big guy too, I would probably get my ass handed to me. Still it would be well deserved. I am just glad I could say no when I was tested with the full fledged affair.


----------



## alexm (Nov 29, 2008)

Laurel said:


> And in the event you fall for your married lover and decide to be together (not likely as most cheaters don't actually end up leaving the spouse voluntarily), the chances of it working out are miniscule. Very few relationships that start as affairs last long term.


My ex wife would fall into the category of it actually working out  She's been with the guy for about 5 years now, plus the 2 they were sneaking around before she left me. Of course, there's still plenty of time left! She's only in her early/mid 30's. I'm sure she'll get bored of him at some point, too!


----------



## Cubby (Mar 28, 2012)

You get involved with married women because you don't have firm boundaries in place. You push your friendships with married women, getting to know them better, telling yourself you won't take it too far, but then you end up liking them more than you should, and they also become attracted to you. It's a bunch of baby steps that get you to where you are. You need to stop before you start taking those steps.

As soon as you find out a woman is married, just stop right there. You can be cordial and pleasant, but that's as far as it should go. Don't be a d-bag. 

At 31, there are millions of single women out there for you to meet. What's the formula for how young you can go? Oh yeah....half your age, plus seven. So any single girl from 22.5 and up is fair game. Emphasis on "single."


----------



## SunnyT (Jun 22, 2011)

Where did that formula come from?


----------



## Cubby (Mar 28, 2012)

SunnyT said:


> Where did that formula come from?


I don't remember where I heard that. Maybe the "Chateau Heartiste" blog, but I'm not sure. The point I was trying to make is that the OP has a lot of options, meaning many single women available to date.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## terrence4159 (Feb 3, 2013)

first of all way to go on not crossing that cheating line man! second when she tells you shes not happy and yada yada..its all that just yada's to get you to sleep with her she is obvioulsy a cheater and this is not her first rodeo.


----------



## Another Planet (Aug 8, 2012)

JustPuzzled said:


> WHAT? You OK?


Not real sure. It is still setting in I think. Maybe I will need to make another thread about my whole endevoure, it is pretty epic unfortunately


----------



## Another Planet (Aug 8, 2012)

omg I am such a piece of ****. I think it happened again tonight. Different MARRIED woman.....
ahhh I will post back tomorrow I am just to tired right now. I am so not looking for sympathy, just a way for this to stop this. I will never end up in a meaningful relationship with this track.


----------



## Sanity (Mar 7, 2011)

Another Planet said:


> omg I am such a piece of ****. I think it happened again tonight. Different MARRIED woman.....
> ahhh I will post back tomorrow I am just to tired right now. I am so not looking for sympathy, just a way for this to stop this. I will never end up in a meaningful relationship with this track.


Wait no offense but how do you date women that all seem to be married? Where are you going? Why aren't you doing research before you date?


----------



## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Do unto others...

(before someone's husband knocks you out).


----------



## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

Another Planet said:


> omg I am such a piece of ****. I think it happened again tonight. Different MARRIED woman.....
> ahhh I will post back tomorrow I am just to tired right now. I am so not looking for sympathy, just a way for this to stop this. I will never end up in a meaningful relationship with this track.


Do you just have really, really, poor boundaries in all aspects of your life? 

I ask because if this sort of thing keeps "just happening" it is either because you suck rather desperately at boundaries or because you are actually looking for married women to hook up with.


----------



## Cubby (Mar 28, 2012)

Rowan said:


> Do you just have really, really, poor boundaries in all aspects of your life?
> 
> I ask because if this sort of thing keeps "just happening" it is either because you suck rather desperately at boundaries or because you are actually looking for married women to hook up with.


Exactly. It's one or the other. Now he knows about boundaries, so it can't be something that "just happens" any more. So from now on, if it "just happens" then he's actively seeking out married women.


----------



## tom67 (Oct 2, 2012)

That is effed up.
The other guy is married and she was happy to be his mistress?
Her sister was okay with this?
She is your xw right? I hope?

Does his w even know about this? WOW.


----------



## tom67 (Oct 2, 2012)

You need to tell the omw now. If it was the other way around wouldn't you want to know. She needs to get tested for STDs and take him to the cleaners.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------

