# Requesting TAM to add a new Topic - Older Folks



## old timer

How would one go about requesting TAM add another category to discussion topics?

Specifically, I'd like to see a category for older folks.

While many aspects may be universal in marriages, infidelities and such, older folks are generally playing with a slightly different deck of cards than most younger people: empty nest (no kids to consider in whether to D or R), menopause/mid life crises, division of assets (retirement accounts, jointly owned property, etc) to name a few.

Thanks


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## Hope Springs Eternal

I would support and participate in this.


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## Twofaces

What constitutes older folks?


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## Hope1964

As long as you realize that the way TAM works, anyone can post anywhere, so your new section would not be 'restricted' to 'older folks' only.


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## old timer

Hope1964 said:


> As long as you realize that the way TAM works, anyone can post anywhere, so your new section would not be 'restricted' to 'older folks' only.


Yep - I understand, Hope. 
*
"What constitutes older folks?" *

*twofaces:* 
As Hope stated - it would be open to all ages, and each TAM member could decide on their own if the topics being discussed were relevant to their particular situation, and whether or not to participate.

I'd think it would be of interest to TAM members from mid-forties and up.


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## Cosmos

I think this could be a good idea, too.


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## sweetpea

Thanks for the suggestion! 

Chris and the moderators will discuss the idea next week, and get back with you. 

Sweet pea


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## Coffee Amore

I really like this idea. I hope it happens.


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## old timer

Thanks for chiming in, Coffee. 

I know it can't happen overnight, but I think the concerns about marriage for older folks doesn't always coincide w/ younger people.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Pandakiss

What exactly is meant by "older"??? Is it just in years or relationship age. I'm just about mid 30's and have been together for 20 years. We have been together longer than not being together. 

And does it really matter that someone in their 40's-ten years my senior, being in their relationship 20 years??? Would we still have the same way of thinking about marriage longevity???


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## old timer

Pandakiss said:


> What exactly is meant by "older"??? Is it just in years or relationship age. I'm just about mid 30's and have been together for 20 years. We have been together longer than not being together.
> 
> And does it really matter that someone in their 40's-ten years my senior, being in their relationship 20 years??? Would we still have the same way of thinking about marriage longevity???


Panda, read the OP mentioning some of the things older couples deal with that younger couples do not.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Twofaces

old timer said:


> Yep - I understand, Hope.
> *
> "What constitutes older folks?" *
> 
> *twofaces:*
> As Hope stated - it would be open to all ages, and each TAM member could decide on their own if the topics being discussed were relevant to their particular situation, and whether or not to participate.
> 
> I'd think it would be of interest to TAM members from mid-forties and up.





Mid 40's and up, im in!


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## Coffee Amore

Pandakiss said:


> Well sorry for asking what exactly was meant by old couples problems. I'm not a young couple. Honestly my first snap judgement was, isn't there some senior citizens forum some where, buuuut that's a wrong assumption to make, so I just thought I would ask.
> 
> And though I'm not heading toward menopause, but I'm a lot closer than I was at 21. I may not be an empty nester yet, but I do have a (at this point, 2 months) 17 year old. So am I going to deal with a adult child, my life will change some what.
> 
> What I don't have to think about retirement?, life changes, so thanks for telling me you don't need my input after 20 years.


I think you're being hard on the OP. He wasn't being rude. You're reading more into his first post than what he said. He said he thinks "older" means age 40 and above.


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## old timer

Panda: sorry if I sounded curt. I didn't mean to imply that yours or anyone else's input would not be welcome. 

Each TAM member could decide whether any of the discussions in an "Older Couples" applied to them, or maybe how their parents had handled problems.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Pandakiss

Sorry i flew off the handle. Sometimes my temper gets the better of me.


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## old timer

Pandakiss said:


> Sorry i flew off the handle. Sometimes my temper gets the better of me.


No problem, Panda. All is good.


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## Hope Springs Eternal

Pandakiss said:


> Sorry i flew off the handle. Sometimes my temper gets the better of me.


You youngsters. Such hotheads!


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## old timer

So...admins...any chance of adding this category?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## sweetpea

We are still discussing the change at the moment. We haven't forgotten about the request. Hope to let you know soon. Thanks!


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## old timer

Cool. Thanks for the reply.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Freak On a Leash

Twofaces said:


> Mid 40's and up, im in!


:lol: :rofl: Is that a good thing? 

I'm all for it, as long as everyone isn't complaining about their various physical ailments, aches and pains and what doctor's appointments they have coming up this week...


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## old timer

Freak On a Leash said:


> :lol: :rofl: Is that a good thing?
> 
> I'm all for it, as long as everyone isn't complaining about their various physical ailments, aches and pains and what doctor's appointments they have coming up this week...


Or getting more fiber in their diet...


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## SomedayDig

Dammit...I'm gonna be mid 40's on 2/23. I don't WANNA be in your section OT!!! 

(mostly cuz you're having a blast in NOLA hanging out on your balcony overlooking Bourbon St) LMFAO!


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## old timer

Ha - I had to come back (sickness in the family), and will not be making my Super Bowl appearance. 

I plan on going back down for the conclusion of Mardi Gras, however.


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## TheOldMan

Hay, folks!!! I'm 73, got married in 1966. I have searched the web for for a long time for a forum like this.

I am looking for a place to exchange thoughts about how to keep life exciting.

If I were a kid again, say around 40 or so...


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## arbitrator

old timer said:


> How would one go about requesting TAM add another category to discussion topics?
> 
> *Specifically, I'd like to see a category for older folks. *
> 
> While many aspects may be universal in marriages, infidelities and such, older folks are generally playing with a slightly different deck of cards than most younger people: empty nest (no kids to consider in whether to D or R), menopause/mid life crises, division of assets (retirement accounts, jointly owned property, etc) to name a few.
> 
> Thanks


Hell, OT! I know that you can't possibly be talking about me! I'm just 60 and still consider myself a somewhat adolescent young pup!

You have absolutely gotta be talking about someone in their 90's!
*But you have contributed a most noble idea! *

*Follow up on it, TAM!*


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## old timer

Welcome, Old Man. 

I'm just a whipper-snapper compared to you (59). 

I'm assuming you're still married. Golden Anniversary just around the corner. That's quite an accomplishment these days.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## old timer

Arb, they've said it's being considered. Told me thus several weeks ago.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## arbitrator

old timer said:


> Ha - I had to come back (sickness in the family), and will not be making my Super Bowl appearance.
> 
> *I plan on going back down for the conclusion of Mardi Gras, however.*



OT: While you're in NOLA, if you should bump into my STBXW and her lardass BF down there, please don't tell them I said "Hi!"

Since even before the onset of our separation, they seem to be a "regular pair" down there on Bourbon Street, more especially during Mardi Gras, at least according to the FB postings and pics that have been shown to me! 

No wonder the divorce is taking so damn long to finalize!


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## old timer

arbitrator said:


> [/B]
> OT: While you're in NOLA, if you should bump into my STBXW and her lardass BF down there, please don't tell them I said "Hi!"
> 
> Since even before the onset of our separation, they seem to be a "regular pair" down there on Bourbon Street, more especially during Mardi Gras, at least according to the FB postings and pics that have been shown to me!
> 
> No wonder the divorce is taking so damn long to finalize!


PM me a pic of them, and I'll be on the lookout


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## TheOldMan

TheOldMan said:


> Hay, folks!!! I'm 73, got married in 1966. I have searched the web for for a long time for a forum like this.
> 
> I am looking for a place to exchange thoughts about how to keep life exciting.
> 
> If I were a kid again, say around 40 or so...


Sorry about the mis-info. I bought my hot car, a Shelby GT350, in '66. Didn't get married to my hot wife until '68. Actually, the car was a lot hotter, but that's another story.


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## StillSearching

Is there a list of the acronyms used in the forums and what they mean?


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## TheOldMan

How can I get to the suggestion box to put in my request for this forum for older folks? or does it already exist and I am missing something?

I have looked all over the web for something like this. Most of what I find is more of interest to people in their 20's and 30's.


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## old timer

Mr.B, there is a list of commonly used acronyms. I'm mobile now and it's pretty hard for me to copy and paste links. Maybe a good neighbor will see this and post it. 

OM- there is no such discussion category. That's why I started this thread.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## TheOldMan

Hay, Old Man,

Thanks for starting it.

Like anyone that is, or has been married, I have some really good stories and some that's not good at all. After solving a multitude of problems there are still more. I guess there always will be. What is best about this forum is that there should be enough answers to cover almost anything.

I've spent hours reading other threads and have faced many of the things they talk about. It's sad to see some of the answers that are given. A lot of them show a lack of understanding, not that I have any better answers for some of them.

I am facing a whole new set of problems because of my age and would really like to get a little input from others.

Thanks again,
TheOldMan


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## TheOldMan

TheOldMan said:


> Hay, Old Man,
> 
> Thanks for starting it.
> 
> Like anyone that is, or has been married, I have some really good stories and some that's not good at all. After solving a multitude of problems there are still more. I guess there always will be. What is best about this forum is that there should be enough answers to cover almost anything.
> 
> I've spent hours reading other threads and have faced many of the things they talk about. It's sad to see some of the answers that are given. A lot of them show a lack of understanding, not that I have any better answers for some of them.
> 
> I am facing a whole new set of problems because of my age and would really like to get a little input from others.
> 
> Thanks again,
> TheOldMan


I beg your pardon. I meant "Old Timer".


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## anchorwatch

Though I don't feel that way, I'm an older fellow myself.

I consider this as the older folk section; 

Long Term Success in Marriage 

Here are the acronyms;

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/forum-guidelines/464-common-message-board-abbreviations-acronyms.html

You could always use the General or Men's areas, there's more traffic there. You'll find all ages helpful.


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## old timer

Thanks for the links aw.

And I agree about all ages being helpful, though I doubt many of the younger folks have very much insight into mid-life crises, empty nesters, or menopause, lol
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Omegaa

old timer said:


> How would one go about requesting TAM add another category to discussion topics?
> 
> Specifically, I'd like to see a category for older folks.
> 
> While many aspects may be universal in marriages, infidelities and such, older folks are generally playing with a slightly different deck of cards than most younger people: empty nest (no kids to consider in whether to D or R), menopause/mid life crises, division of assets (retirement accounts, jointly owned property, etc) to name a few.
> 
> Thanks


Hi

"older"? How about People in Golden Years? 

I take your point though. I was replying to a thread written by someone in Twenties assuming the person would be at least in 40s/50s. How so WRONG was I...  

I agree. I noticed some people are passing judgement according to their own perception in THEIR OWN AGE. Sometimes, this isn't fair if you are at crossroads in much older age group. 

Do you think "older section" would help people/you to be able to discuss more openly?


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## Omegaa

old timer said:


> Thanks for the links aw.
> 
> And I agree about all ages being helpful, though I doubt many of the younger folks have very much insight into mid-life crises, empty nesters, or menopause, lol
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I did ask you about your wife's menopause in your thread to no avail. I thought it had a lot to do with your reactions. 

Maybe, you thought I was too young to know. LOL! I'm not that young. )

Anyway, a sensible suggestion.

Happy St Valentine's Day whatever you do.


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## Amplexor

Omegaa said:


> Hi
> 
> "older"? How about People in Golden Years?
> 
> I take your point though. I was replying to a thread written by someone in Twenties assuming the person would be at least in 40s/50s. How so WRONG was I...
> 
> I agree. I noticed some people are passing judgement according to their own perception in THEIR OWN AGE. Sometimes, this isn't fair if you are at crossroads in much older age group.
> 
> Do you think "older section" would help people/you to be able to discuss more openly?


The old fart forum was discussed but we felt that adding an additional forum would complicate things. If we get to 20 or 30 sub forums it just puts too many options out there. And besides all the young whippersnappers could use some of our sage. Amp is 56.


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## Omegaa

Amplexor said:


> The old fart forum was discussed but we felt that adding an additional forum would complicate things. If we get to 20 or 30 sub forums it just puts too many options out there. And besides all the young whippersnappers could use some of our sage. Amp is 56.


Hi 

Old fart...That does sound very negative doesn't it 

I did come across with a very interesting thread started by a mature lady (60s) and she was able to address her issues very well.


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## old timer

Omegaa said:


> I did ask you about your wife's menopause in your thread to no avail. I thought it had a lot to do with your reactions.
> 
> Maybe, you thought I was too young to know. LOL! I'm not that young. )
> 
> Anyway, a sensible suggestion.
> 
> Happy St Valentine's Day whatever you do.


Sorry, I didn't address the menopause issues before, O. I must have overlooked them - def wasn't avoiding the topic. In retrospect, i think MP had a lot to do w my W's behavior 5 yrs ago. But I can't retroactively change my (or her) methods of dealing w it. 

If we could turn back the clock, TAM would have very few posters.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## pb76no

Sorry the "old fart" section was voted down, I was kinda looking forward to it. I mean, even Denny's has a senior's menu!!!! Perhaps you could just call it the "Early Bird Special".


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## TheOldMan

Amplexor said:


> The old fart forum was discussed but we felt that adding an additional forum would complicate things. If we get to 20 or 30 sub forums it just puts too many options out there. And besides all the young whippersnappers could use some of our sage. Amp is 56.


I looked at the link that was recommended and all thru the threads. It didn't fit what I was looking for and thought I found. To me it looked something like a business with all the files dropped into the top drawer of the filling cabinet and I couldn't find the ones I wanted.

Since this was to be exactly what I was looking for I think I'll just move on and keep looking.

I enjoyed the time I spent here. Thanks!!!
TheOldMan


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## old timer

TheOldMan said:


> Since this was to be exactly what I was looking for I think I'll just move on and keep looking.
> 
> I enjoyed the time I spent here. Thanks!!!
> TheOldMan


(Swear to goodness - this isn't my alt ID). 

OM - hang around - don't be a crotchety old fart!
We can teach some of these young bucks a few things, lol.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Omegaa

old timer said:


> Sorry, I didn't address the menopause issues before, O. I must have overlooked them - def wasn't avoiding the topic. In retrospect, i think MP had a lot to do w my W's behavior 5 yrs ago. But I can't retroactively change my (or her) methods of dealing w it.
> 
> If we could turn back the clock, TAM would have very few posters.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Hi

Looking forward to your future posts on MP. :smthumbup:

All my Best,


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## TheOldMan

old timer said:


> (Swear to goodness - this isn't my alt ID).
> 
> OM - hang around - don't be a crotchety old fart!
> We can teach some of these young bucks a few things, lol.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Hay, OT,

Thanks for the reply, but at this particular time in my life I don't have the time, energy, or desire to "teach some of these young bucks a few things". I've got some issues that are specific to seniors, some of witch make me "crotchety old fart".

I found a forum for seniors that covers a lot of territory. I don't think it would be right to post the name or url here.

I'll still stop by here to keep an eye on whats going on. Maybe they will change their mind, but I really don't feel like arguing for it.

OM


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## old timer

OM - you can send the URL to me in a PM. 

TIA
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Omegaa

TheOldMan said:


> Hay, OT,
> 
> Thanks for the reply, but at this particular time in my life I don't have the time, energy, or desire to "teach some of these young bucks a few things". I've got some issues that are specific to seniors, some of witch make me "crotchety old fart".
> 
> I found a forum for seniors that covers a lot of territory. I don't think it would be right to post the name or url here.
> 
> OM


Hi OM

Would you mind sending me PM re. the link as well, please?

Thanks so much.

Regards,


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## old timer

Still think an "old farts" category would be a good idea...


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