# Ladies, are you in pain during and after sex?



## coupdegrace (Oct 15, 2012)

When my wife and I have intercourse, she always complains about her labia (lips) burning afterwards, but we don't know what the cause is. We've seen a few female doctors, but all they've done is guess, and guess wrong. 

When my wife and I finish and I pull out, she is almost in tears. When I perform oral sex on her (which is quite frequent), she orgasms and there's never an issue, but it always seems to burn like hell during and after intercourse. I'm not that big of a guy (6"-7" erect), so I don't think stretching her lips the cause for the burning and discomfort.

Is there anyone here that experiences anything similar? If so, do you have any advice or remedies?


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

Has she ever been tested for a semen allergy?


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## coupdegrace (Oct 15, 2012)

Hope1964 said:


> Has she ever been tested for a semen allergy?


No, she hasn't... and that's about the only thing she hasn't been tested for. I've never even heard of such a thing.


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## Cosmos (May 4, 2012)

coupdegrace said:


> No, she hasn't... and that's about the only thing she hasn't been tested for. I've never even heard of such a thing.


You could test this out for yourselves by seeing if using a condom brings about the same problem.

In the meanwhile, here's a link for semen allergy info:- Semen Allergy - Causes, Symptoms, Treatment for Semen Allergy


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

Pretty rare but it might be worth looking into. I am surprised no doctor thought of it.

Human Seminal Plasma Hypersensitivity | Embarrassing | Health | Channel4.com/bodies


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## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

I had burning with intercourse for a while. It was definitely the semen, but I am not actually allergic to it. In my case, it was most likely a pH problem. My doctor theorized that mine and my husband's fluids combined to create a mixture which was a bit more acidic than was comfortable to me. It felt sort of like pouring lemon juice on a paper cut. Not sexy. At all.

In my case, it started when I went on a higher dose birth control pill to combat irregular and prolonged periods and continued to be a problem for as long as I was on the higher dose. I also noticed it was worse after he'd been smoking or drinking a lot. Whether that was due to the smoking or alcohol, or simply to him being dehydrated and more...um, concentrated...if you will, I don't know. 

Start by ruling out a semen allergy. Also, rule out lubes, soap or laundry residues, fragrances, oils, or anything else you can think of that might be "on" you that's getting "in" her during sex. If none of that solves the issue, it may be a result of something either you or she are consuming - medicines, food, drink, smoking, etc.


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## I Notice The Details (Sep 15, 2012)

My wife is diabetic, which means that she doesn't have a lot of natural lubrication. That made sex a little uncomfortable for her at times, with burning feeling sometimes. 

After 5 years of marriage, we found out that she also had an allergy to latex condoms...and we had been using them for a while. This was also causing a burning sensation on her lips. 

We focused on tons of foreplay, got rid of the condoms, I got a vasectomy, and use lubricant if necessary. All is good now.


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## LookingForTheSun (Dec 28, 2011)

You might be rubbing against her - like kissing a man with a beard. Maybe try some manscaping. If you already do, you might be too prickly - I know that sounds dumb, but it is true.


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## coupdegrace (Oct 15, 2012)

Thanks for the advice, everyone!



Rowan said:


> I had burning with intercourse for a while. It was definitely the semen, but I am not actually allergic to it. In my case, it was most likely a pH problem. My doctor theorized that mine and my husband's fluids combined to create a mixture which was a bit more acidic than was comfortable to me. It felt sort of like pouring lemon juice on a paper cut. Not sexy. At all.
> 
> In my case, it started when I went on a higher dose birth control pill to combat irregular and prolonged periods and continued to be a problem for as long as I was on the higher dose. I also noticed it was worse after he'd been smoking or drinking a lot. Whether that was due to the smoking or alcohol, or simply to him being dehydrated and more...um, concentrated...if you will, I don't know.
> 
> Start by ruling out a semen allergy. Also, rule out lubes, soap or laundry residues, fragrances, oils, or anything else you can think of that might be "on" you that's getting "in" her during sex. If none of that solves the issue, it may be a result of something either you or she are consuming - medicines, food, drink, smoking, etc.


My wife read somewhere that the symptoms may be consistent with the detergent we use. Over the weekend, she purchased different detergent and fabric softner to see if this could be the cause.

After reviewing the two links in the previous posts, I'm wondering if my diet has something to do with my semen causing her to burn, IF that's the case. I drink very acidic juices on a regular basis: OJ, Pineapple and lemon juice, Sunny Delight, etc. I'm a vitamin C freak. Perhaps the acidity is affecting the composition of my semen. Still, my wife has complained about the burning DURING intercourse. I know semen is present in Cowper's gland, but I don't think it's enough to drip out and spread all over her labia. Typically, after 10 minutes of intercourse, she'll tell me, "It's starting to hurt, so you need to cum soon."

Perhaps Rowan's situation is similar to ours in that both our fluids combine to create a more acidic mix. I will try sex with a condom and see if that helps. The problem is, we're trying to conceive, and after 2 recent miscarriages, I'm trying to avoid things that she would be sensitive to.


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## coupdegrace (Oct 15, 2012)

I Notice The Details said:


> My wife is diabetic, which means that she doesn't have a lot of natural lubrication. That made sex a little uncomfortable for her at times, with burning feeling sometimes.
> 
> After 5 years of marriage, we found out that she also had an allergy to latex condoms...and we had been using them for a while. This was also causing a burning sensation on her lips.
> 
> We focused on tons of foreplay, got rid of the condoms, I got a vasectomy, and use lubricant if necessary. All is good now.


My wife isn't diabetic, but we will try condoms and see if that helps. Thanks!



LookingForTheSun said:


> You might be rubbing against her - like kissing a man with a beard. Maybe try some manscaping. If you already do, you might be too prickly - I know that sounds dumb, but it is true.


LOL! I don't think that's it. I'm always on the bottom during sex because I'm a fairly large guy, (6'3", 250lbs) and she's a very small lady, (5'0" 120lbs). If there's any scraping, she's doing it to herself.


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## Cosmos (May 4, 2012)

> Typically, after 10 minutes of intercourse, she'll tell me, "It's starting to hurt, so you need to cum soon."


*Ten minutes*? Unless there's lots of lubrication going on, this could be the problem, OP... Perhaps you could cut down actual penetration time.


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## coupdegrace (Oct 15, 2012)

Cosmos said:


> *Ten minutes*? Unless there's lots of lubrication going on, this could be the problem, OP... Perhaps you could cut down actual penetration time.


We never engage in sex unless we have plenty of lube. We always use "Pre Seed" which works very well, so that's not the issue... at least I don't think it is.










Cut down on 10 minutes?!? Anything less than 10 minutes and we might as well not even have intercourse.


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## Cosmos (May 4, 2012)

> Cut down on 10 minutes?!? Anything less than 10 minutes and we might as well not even have intercourse.


OP, are you actually talking about _10 minutes of thrusting _here?


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## coupdegrace (Oct 15, 2012)

Cosmos said:


> OP, are you actually talking about _10 minutes of thrusting _here?


No. As I previously stated, I'm never on top. Because I'm a giant (compared to her), I allow her to be on top to control the action. We've tried other positions (i.e. Doggiestyle), but they hurt.


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## Cosmos (May 4, 2012)

OK. In that case it really might be worth looking into the semen allergy scenario.


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## BFGuru (Jan 28, 2013)

I dealt with years of pain in my early marriage. Turned ut I had vaginal muscle spasms, was allergic to Ky which was the only lubricant I knew of back then and allergic to latex. Burning is an understatement. Ring of fire is more like it.

We changed lubricants (normally slippery stuff a.k.a. Femglide), stopped using latest condoms, and took our time so I also was releasing my own lubricant. Lubrication is a must. The more the merrier because I was also dry.

I ended up going to physical therapy for the muscle spasms which was mortifying, but it ended up really helping once we combined it all. Every now and then I try a diff lubricant. Sometimes it's good sometimes it's bad. Plain sesame seed oil also woks as a good lubricant.


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## Zing (Nov 15, 2012)

I've had a brief phase in my sexually active life where I remember having had this 'burning feeling' after my husband came. It was not bad enough for me to start rolling about in pain or start crying...but was nearly getting there... now, I am prone to UTIs so I know it wasn't that..and I know it wasn't any other infections either... I only remember now that it was clearly the semen that caused it...it lasted for sometime and then went off ....I fail to recollect what could have caused those changes and/or what happened that it went away, but yes this temporary semen-burning is something I have encountered...


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## coupdegrace (Oct 15, 2012)

My wife and I discussed last night and in her vast internet research, she thinks she may have Vulvodynia. 

Vulvodynia - MayoClinic.com

Some of the symptoms fit, but there's no definite way to know as the doctors she saw didn't have a clue. Still, there may be some merit to this semen allergy, however it wouldn't explain how the burning starts before I ejaculate.

I just hope the pain is nothing like my allergic reaction to Nonoxonol 9, that spermicide that's on Trojan condoms. After using those condoms, I felt like I was urinating needles.


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## Cosmos (May 4, 2012)

coupdegrace said:


> My wife and I discussed last night and in her vast internet research, she thinks she may have Vulvodynia.
> 
> Vulvodynia - MayoClinic.com
> 
> ...


Pre-ejaculate perhaps?


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## coupdegrace (Oct 15, 2012)

Cosmos said:


> Pre-ejaculate perhaps?


I suppose that could be possible, with the lubricant acting as a spreading agent for the Cowper's gland.


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## Cosmos (May 4, 2012)

I would certainly experiment a couple of times with condoms and PIV sex. Even if it did turn out that your W is allergic to your semen, apparently there is treatment to become desensitized to it.


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