# help!!!!!!!



## Serenity79 (Oct 15, 2009)

My first time ever posting, I am in need of some advice and direction.My story is a little complex, I'll try to make a long story short.....

H and I where married Oct 2007, we married while he was in federal prison. We have know one another since high school and we were always just friends, but we reconnected after some hard times in my life.

Prior to H and I reconnecting, I was a single mother, had a decent job brought my 1st home at 24, had my own car you know I was doing good for myself. I've always dealt with bouts of depression, and I've always felt that I needed a man to define me. Thus I have been in some not so good relationships. 

My mother passed away in Sept 06, I became guardian to my siblings who are now 15(and pregnant), 16,16,13, my mentally challenged brother who is 38, and oh yeah don't forget about my own children 7, and me and H have a 6month old together. So he came home to this large blended family, he didn't want to live in the city that we are originally from so I packed up the kids and we moved 2 hrs away.

We have had issues money,kids, communication with others(on his behalf). He made me feel as if I was crazy and he always had this way of shifting the focus from him to me....very manipulative. I started going to counseling, and I started taking meds Lexapro for depression and trazadone to help me sleep at night, I thought that it was me and I thought that me getting on the meds would help. He was ot very good at supporting me if I had a crappy day he would say things like "your medication must not be working". We have been seperated since July, but it didn't seem like it he was here all the time, we were going to counseling

He has been communicating with a so called female cousin for quite some time, I didn't approve because it just didn't seem appropriate, but he continued because he felt like I was trying to tell him what to do. Well I requested this cousins husband to be a friend on facebook, my H's so called cousin began to email me and she began to say things such as "we all know that your crazy, we heard that you are on medication, you need to leave my husband alone and go see your therapist"I felt so betrayed because she could have only gotten this info from my H! Since then we have not spoken, and some how he is upset with me. Im so hurt, he hasn't even tried to contact or see the kids. Im scared, he's 32, and I am 30 we are young. I've put up with a lot, I have made so many sacrafices and I have been invested 100%. I don't know if he has ever slept with anyone else, but I know that he has communicated with other females, so who knows. 

I guess I just need to know do I just give him space, it's hard he made me so many promises, one of the children that is in my care he convinced me to adopt him, I really didn't want to bcuz he has a lot of mental problems, and behavior problems, and my H said do it he promised that he would help me, but he's not here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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## dobo (Jun 30, 2009)

Why do you want him back?


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## Ilovemyfeelings (Oct 20, 2009)

Yes, why do you want him back? 

If it because you LOVE him...stop and LOVE you, get back to loving you....


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