# Am I overreacting to this? Husband took my pills.



## Magilly30

Ok, I will try to be as concise as possible. My husband and I have been married for 9 years. We have an 8 year old and a 2 year old. We have always been social drinkers, and live in an area where drinking is expected and apart of the culture. Since the beginning I have told him I think he drinks too much. He works offshore, so he does NOT drink while working. But when he is home, he drinks beer and wine daily. Usually light beer (4-6 per night) or wine (a bottle). I will also drink, but usually only have 1 or 2 (at most, some nights none). When he is offshore I dont drink at all. I dont even know what I would classify him as...I guess a "functioning alcoholic" or maybe someone with a drinking habit? He has a low tolerance to alcohol, and if he has one or two beers I can tell. Bottom line it has always bothered me that he has this daily desire to drink...to get a buzz. He does get "drunk" occasionally but that has become rare. In the early part of our marraige he would get so drunk at times that he wouldn't know where to pee, and would pee on a chair or something....I got so pissed at him during those years and told him that if that continued I'd end up leaving him. He has always reacted mildy to my anger and has always appeased me and apologized, but at the same time not really fixing it. He has calmed down and now rarely gets "drunk" but still....it is so annoying that he has to drink everyday. 

OK SO SORRY THIS IS THIS LONG! Well, he has never given me a reason to think he would use drugs or pills. He is randomly drug tested at his job and I trusted him and believed that he has never had the urge to jeopordize this. Here is the deal: I am prescribed lortabs for migraine headaches. I take one or two monthly if that. We went to the beach last Friday for a long weekend, coming home Monday. My brother stayed at the house to house sit. I went to take one of the 10 pills that were left today because I had a bad headache, and found only 1 remaining. I immediately thought it was my brother who took them (this definately within the realm of possibility, but he is a pretty good guy) and I texted my bro about it. After a minute I went into the kitchen to tell my husband, "I think my bro took my pain pills while we were out of town!" and he immediately came clean and said, "no it was me, I took a few". I said "How many? WTH!" and he said, "7 or 8, I dont know". I could tell he was remorseful but he didn't say anything else. Keep in mind that about 30 minutes earlier we had one of our routine convos about how I think he drinks too much and he needs to stop it. I told him (again) that his dependance on alcohol will be the end of us..... 

So after he admited to taking the pills I just stared at him and didn't know what to say, started to cry and walked away.

I am phobic about addiction, and I have been a wreck about this for the past 5 hours. I wont talk to him and have been quietly crying about it. I just feel that he is sneaky and this is addictive behavior. I am embarrassed that I even texted my brother, and didn't think for a second it would be my husband. However, I do believe that this is the first of this type of behavior from him. (that is why it is so surprising, because I've had pain pills pretty much for the duration of our marraige). 

Jeez. Am I overreacting? I know that this is very mild compared to what some couples go through, But I am just scared he will become addicted to pills or something. I am also hurt that he was sneaky about it..... I dont know. Give opinions! Am I being a weirdo??


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## Shaggy

Do the pills do anything other than help with migraines? A high a low ? Anything?


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## Magilly30

Shaggy, for me? I get a mild euphoric feeling if that. I take with food and lay down to go to sleep. They are the last resort if my usual migraine med Maxalt doesn't work....so they are always around because they aren't used very much. Also, I tend to use them sporadically because they usually give me a rebound headache the next day.


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## Sara Ann

I used to take my friend's pain pills. Lortabs, my favorites. I give him kudos for being honest with you. I would have denied it.

Maybe he's open to changing things. Maybe he feels guilty about the drinking and wanting the pills, but doesn't know what to do, how to change. 

Start this discussion with him and see where it takes you. And be careful about going into those 12 step rooms. They tell you what to think and don't give you room to find your own way. There are other options.


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## Runs like Dog

Lortab is hydrocodone and Tylenol. So a) it's a synthetic opioid subject the same abuse and b) prone to cause liver damage in relative 'low' (e.g. recreational) doses. Also combining it with alcohol is super high risk for CNS depression respiratory failure and death.


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## In_The_Wind

Magilly30 said:


> Ok, I will try to be as concise as possible. My husband and I have been married for 9 years. We have an 8 year old and a 2 year old. We have always been social drinkers, and live in an area where drinking is expected and apart of the culture. Since the beginning I have told him I think he drinks too much. He works offshore, so he does NOT drink while working. But when he is home, he drinks beer and wine daily. Usually light beer (4-6 per night) or wine (a bottle). I will also drink, but usually only have 1 or 2 (at most, some nights none). When he is offshore I dont drink at all. I dont even know what I would classify him as...I guess a "functioning alcoholic" or maybe someone with a drinking habit? He has a low tolerance to alcohol, and if he has one or two beers I can tell. Bottom line it has always bothered me that he has this daily desire to drink...to get a buzz. He does get "drunk" occasionally but that has become rare. In the early part of our marraige he would get so drunk at times that he wouldn't know where to pee, and would pee on a chair or something....I got so pissed at him during those years and told him that if that continued I'd end up leaving him. He has always reacted mildy to my anger and has always appeased me and apologized, but at the same time not really fixing it. He has calmed down and now rarely gets "drunk" but still....it is so annoying that he has to drink everyday.
> 
> OK SO SORRY THIS IS THIS LONG! Well, he has never given me a reason to think he would use drugs or pills. He is randomly drug tested at his job and I trusted him and believed that he has never had the urge to jeopordize this. Here is the deal: I am prescribed lortabs for migraine headaches. I take one or two monthly if that. We went to the beach last Friday for a long weekend, coming home Monday. My brother stayed at the house to house sit. I went to take one of the 10 pills that were left today because I had a bad headache, and found only 1 remaining. I immediately thought it was my brother who took them (this definately within the realm of possibility, but he is a pretty good guy) and I texted my bro about it. After a minute I went into the kitchen to tell my husband, "I think my bro took my pain pills while we were out of town!" and he immediately came clean and said, "no it was me, I took a few". I said "How many? WTH!" and he said, "7 or 8, I dont know". I could tell he was remorseful but he didn't say anything else. Keep in mind that about 30 minutes earlier we had one of our routine convos about how I think he drinks too much and he needs to stop it. I told him (again) that his dependance on alcohol will be the end of us.....
> 
> So after he admited to taking the pills I just stared at him and didn't know what to say, started to cry and walked away.
> 
> I am phobic about addiction, and I have been a wreck about this for the past 5 hours. I wont talk to him and have been quietly crying about it. I just feel that he is sneaky and this is addictive behavior. I am embarrassed that I even texted my brother, and didn't think for a second it would be my husband. However, I do believe that this is the first of this type of behavior from him. (that is why it is so surprising, because I've had pain pills pretty much for the duration of our marraige).
> 
> Jeez. Am I overreacting? I know that this is very mild compared to what some couples go through, But I am just scared he will become addicted to pills or something. I am also hurt that he was sneaky about it..... I dont know. Give opinions! Am I being a weirdo??


I dont think you are over reacting i mean 7 or 8 pills to me thats alot i think most prescriptions call for 1 every 4 to 6 hours sounds like he was trying to get high


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## unbelievable

Not sure where you live, but in my state, Hydrocodone (Lortab) is a schedule II narcotic and it's a felony to obtain it through theft, fraud, or subterfuge. If your husband is drinking four beers a night, he's got at least one addiction. Sneaking, lying, stealing, or any other dishonest behaviors are not compatible with a healthy marriage. Getting high and drowning on the job while on a ship at sea isn't conducive to a healthy marriage. Getting one's buddies killed on the job because you're stoned isn't good. Getting tossed into prison for something stupid and making one's wife use grocery money for bail and lawyers isn't conducive to a healthy marriage. In any case, if pills, money, porn, girlfriend, or whatever is more important to a husband than his wife's ability to trust him, he's got a problem.


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## Sara Ann

Let's not get carried away here. Lortabs are pretty safe, and if you are used to them like I was you can take dozens in a day and never doze off. They are even safe for pregnant and nursing moms, so get a grip guys! I took 40x 325mg of tylenol a day for many years, and at the end when I quit my liver, kidney, and thyroid all came back normal. I have never heard of a drug overdose on hydrocodone. They all were something stronger, usually oxy+a downer like alcohol or xanax, which do make people into zombies. I doctor shopped for years and my state pharmacy database contacted a couple of my doctors over the years but I was never contacted or charged with anything. I was on the PTA during this time, I started a business, everyone thought I was so perfect and admired me, I was so far from prison, and I took multiples of what this guy did. So don't scare this lady unless you know what you're talking about, geez!

He was probably trying to get high, he is receptive to changing because he was honest about it, so take that as an opening and talk about why he does this, what is lacking in his life, what he is avoiding, and focus on his dreams and goals. People who choose substances know it's wrong and they go deeper into it sometimes instead of dealing with some discomfort or insecurity or chasing their dreams.


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