# wife being inappropriate?



## sgpin84

So we had some friends over, a few females, and males...so anyway we was all sat, in the living room joking! around having a laugh. My wife was wearing tight jeans. 

she was sat kneeling on the sofa!! you know the usuall kneeling position..with your bum sat on the back of your feet.

BUT..she was sat with her knees wide apart??? infront of all my mates joking and laughing...!?

then a week later i had a friend over, my wife was sat on the floor,
she was speaking to my mate, and yet again sitting knees apart???
with her hands between her legs??

and this has happened quite often? my question is for women is this normally how you would sit? or was this inappropriate sitting?

or maybe am i looking too far in to this??


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## MrsAldi

Here, give her this....your majesty. 









Sent from my B1-730HD using Tapatalk


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## straightshooter

SG,

Obviously, there is not enough in your post to give you any factual information, but the old sayinmg is "TRUST YOUR GUT". You gut has found whatever she is doing to be concerning enough to you that you went online and are asking a bunch of strangers about this. 

So given that fact, until you post more about her other behavior, I think we need to go under the assumption that YOU. ARE not CRAZY and that your wife is being too suggestive in her behavior. 

So here are a couple of suggestions
(1) do not say anything yet to her
(2) Google "sings your wife is cheating". If you are seeing things like guarding her phone, unexplained disappearances, change in appearance, more makeup, "grooming " herself differently, less sex, etc, then you better be concerned.
(3) if you still are concerned, put a VAR in her car. You will most likely get the information you need within a week
(4) check your phone bills and look for an unknown number with a lot of texts or call or longer duration calls

Those might just be starters. If you immediately after two instances talk to her, then if she is up to something she will just hide it better.

I'd be more concerned for you if you told me the same guy was who she was talking to or if she had a skirt up to her ass on and was flashing him. But then again, remember my first sentence.

TRUST YOUR GUT!!! Most of the time that works out better. Your WORST enemy can be denial.

Good luck. If you want more advice from others, I'd suggest more details of what is going on.


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## alexm

straightshooter said:


> SG,
> 
> Obviously, there is not enough in your post to give you any factual information, but the old sayinmg is "TRUST YOUR GUT". You gut has found whatever she is doing to be concerning enough to you that you went online and are asking a bunch of strangers about this.
> 
> So given that fact, until you post more about her other behavior, I think we need to go under the assumption that YOU. ARE not CRAZY and that your wife is being too suggestive in her behavior.
> 
> So here are a couple of suggestions
> (1) do not say anything yet to her
> (2) Google "sings your wife is cheating". If you are seeing things like guarding her phone, unexplained disappearances, change in appearance, more makeup, "grooming " herself differently, less sex, etc, then you better be concerned.
> (3) if you still are concerned, put a VAR in her car. You will most likely get the information you need within a week
> (4) check your phone bills and look for an unknown number with a lot of texts or call or longer duration calls
> 
> Those might just be starters. If you immediately after two instances talk to her, then if she is up to something she will just hide it better.
> 
> I'd be more concerned for you if you told me the same guy was who she was talking to or if she had a skirt up to her ass on and was flashing him. But then again, remember my first sentence.
> 
> TRUST YOUR GUT!!! Most of the time that works out better. Your WORST enemy can be denial.
> 
> Good luck. If you want more advice from others, I'd suggest more details of what is going on.


Easy there, Hoss. I know you mean well, but it's a tad early to break out the VAR.

She's just kneeling. :surprise:


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## Mr.StrongMan

sgpin84 said:


> So we had some friends over, a few females, and males...so anyway we was all sat, in the living room joking! around having a laugh. My wife was wearing tight jeans.
> 
> she was sat kneeling on the sofa!! you know the usuall kneeling position..with your bum sat on the back of your feet.
> 
> BUT..she was sat with her knees wide apart??? infront of all my mates joking and laughing...!?
> 
> then a week later i had a friend over, my wife was sat on the floor,
> she was speaking to my mate, and yet again sitting knees apart???
> with her hands between her legs??
> 
> and this has happened quite often? my question is for women is this normally how you would sit? or was this inappropriate sitting?
> 
> or maybe am i looking too far in to this??


Yes I would say her body language was inappropriate.


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## Haiku

Was her face veiled though?


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## Spotthedeaddog

You have to compare it to the way she acts/sit around others.

Sometimes if it is your friend, she may just feel comfortable and safe around him; especially if the sitting suits a wider angle.
Again this is quite common when many women don't wear skirts or dresses any more - and so don't have to sit in a way for the fabric to fall closed.

However if you observe that she tends to sit closed around other people (including you), or other body language is open or inviting then perhaps you need to be more concerned about your relationship with her.
Also consider the person she's angling at, are then reflecting or copying poses or motions, placing items towards her, or placing themselves closer to her than she is to you? Generally if a target is "just being polite" there will be a combination of "friendly"/"accepting" and "closed"/"deflecting" behaviors. eg he may have a posture that takes her into the forward angle, but would use closed hand or leg positioning - or the other way around.
He may look and talk to her, but refocus as soon as the discussion is done (or turn away fully when addressed) - although if he is turned toward her, has open body signals, and averts his gaze or acts distracted, then you should be more concern as these are signs of distress related to hiding things.


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## Spicy

My mom taught me to sit with my legs closed, basically like what @MrsAldi posted, so I personally wouldn't sit like that around others than my immediate family.

That being said, yes, she may just be really comfortable with your friends...

I have such a joking/sarcastic relationship with my husband...if he said "Babe, why were you sitting like such a floozy the other night? Trying to give away the farm?" We would laugh about it, but I would get the point too. Not sure if that would work in your dynamic with your wife or not, but if it bothers you, then you could mention it in a lighthearted way.


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## rafaelandy

personally, i don't see anything wrong. perhaps she's just comfortable with herself sitting in that position and wear. i will suggest to go easy on this one.

if you are really uncomfortable with her behavior, talk to her calmly about how you feel. explain to her why you feel that way. 

i think she will appreciate your concern for her.


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## SunCMars

sgpin84 said:


> So we had some friends over, a few females, and males...so anyway we was all sat, in the living room joking! around having a laugh. My wife was wearing tight jeans.
> 
> she was sat kneeling on the sofa!! you know the usuall kneeling position..with your bum sat on the back of your feet.
> 
> BUT..she was sat with her knees wide apart??? infront of all my mates joking and laughing...!?
> 
> then a week later i had a friend over, my wife was sat on the floor,
> she was speaking to my mate, and yet again sitting knees apart???
> with her hands between her legs??
> 
> and this has happened quite often? my question is for women is this normally how you would sit? or was this inappropriate sitting?
> 
> or maybe am i looking too far in to this??


Who knows. Women are more flexible than men. I think that this has more to do with being comfortable than her being revealing and coy. IMO.

Tell her nicely that sitting "like that" is not attractive for a married women. 

Possibilities:
She does not know that this bothers you.
She may not have any idea that this posture is overtly sexual.
She may not know that you are "on to her"....???

You, obviously have jealousy concerns with respect to your wife.
What are her other "Red Flag" behaviors? If none, then this is fixable and likely a non-starter. 

YOU TELL US.

Good Luck!


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## Evinrude58

Yep, why are you worried?
Gotta be something going on that has alerted your spidey sense
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## jb02157

I don't see anything wrong with this. She probably doesn't even realize that she's doing this and it's just a comfortable way to sit for her. You could bring it up to her, but it would come across as awfully controlling. If you think this is indicative of something inappropriate going on I would get evidence of that before I would do anything.


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## sgpin84

ill explain a bit more in a bit...but this picture is close enough, to give you an example....


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## jld

straightshooter said:


> SG,
> 
> Obviously, there is not enough in your post to give you any factual information, but the old sayinmg is "TRUST YOUR GUT". You gut has found whatever she is doing to be concerning enough to you that you went online and are asking a bunch of strangers about this.
> 
> So given that fact, until you post more about her other behavior, I think we need to go under the assumption that YOU. ARE not CRAZY and that your wife is being too suggestive in her behavior.
> 
> So here are a couple of suggestions
> (1) do not say anything yet to her
> (2) Google "sings your wife is cheating". If you are seeing things like guarding her phone, unexplained disappearances, change in appearance, more makeup, "grooming " herself differently, less sex, etc, then you better be concerned.
> (3) if you still are concerned, put a VAR in her car. You will most likely get the information you need within a week
> (4) check your phone bills and look for an unknown number with a lot of texts or call or longer duration calls
> 
> Those might just be starters. If you immediately after two instances talk to her, then if she is up to something she will just hide it better.
> 
> I'd be more concerned for you if you told me the same guy was who she was talking to or if she had a skirt up to her ass on and was flashing him. But then again, remember my first sentence.
> 
> TRUST YOUR GUT!!! Most of the time that works out better. Your WORST enemy can be denial.
> 
> Good luck. If you want more advice from others, I'd suggest more details of what is going on.


This is a joke, right?


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## WonkyNinja

sgpin84 said:


> So we had some friends over, a few females, and males...so anyway we was all sat, in the living room joking! around having a laugh. My wife was wearing tight jeans.
> 
> she was sat kneeling on the sofa!! you know the usuall kneeling position..with your bum sat on the back of your feet.
> 
> BUT..she was sat with her knees wide apart??? infront of all my mates joking and laughing...!?
> 
> then a week later i had a friend over, my wife was sat on the floor,
> she was speaking to my mate, and yet again sitting knees apart???
> with her hands between her legs??
> 
> and this has happened quite often? my question is for women is this normally how you would sit? or was this inappropriate sitting?
> 
> or maybe am i looking too far in to this??


How the ***k do you go from the OP post above to this? 

This is beyond ridiculous.



straightshooter said:


> SG,
> 
> Obviously, there is not enough in your post to give you any factual information, but the old sayinmg is "TRUST YOUR GUT". You gut has found whatever she is doing to be concerning enough to you that you went online and are asking a bunch of strangers about this.
> 
> So given that fact, until you post more about her other behavior, I think we need to go under the assumption that YOU. ARE not CRAZY and that your wife is being too suggestive in her behavior.
> 
> So here are a couple of suggestions
> (1) do not say anything yet to her
> (2) *Google "sings your wife is cheating"*. If you are seeing things like guarding her phone, unexplained disappearances, change in appearance, more makeup, "grooming " herself differently, less sex, etc, then you better be concerned.
> (3) if you still are concerned, put a VAR in her car. You will most likely get the information you need within a week
> (4) check your phone bills and look for an unknown number with a lot of texts or call or longer duration calls
> 
> Those might just be starters. If you immediately after two instances talk to her, then if she is up to something she will just hide it better.
> 
> I'd be more concerned for you if you told me the same guy was who she was talking to or if she had a skirt up to her ass on and was flashing him. But then again, remember my first sentence.
> 
> TRUST YOUR GUT!!! Most of the time that works out better. Your WORST enemy can be denial.
> 
> Good luck. If you want more advice from others, I'd suggest more details of what is going on.


In fact you've pretty well rewritten the post to suit your own agenda.


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## tropicalbeachiwish

Thank goodness she wasn't wearing that mini skirt. Jk.

You're making a mountain out of a mole hill. Let it go. 

Sent from my SM-G930V using Tapatalk


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## norajane

Lol! One of the reasons people wear jeans (and yoga pants, lol!) is they are comfortable and allow you to sit any way that is comfortable when hanging out at home.


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## GTdad

I wish I could still sit like that without breaking something.

You're over-reacting, OP.


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## Maricha75

GTdad said:


> I wish I could still sit like that without breaking something.
> 
> You're over-reacting, OP.


You and me, both. It's been so long since I was able to sit like that. If I could, I most definitely would... I don't care if it's "proper" or not. If I am wearing pants, I will sit however I am comfortable. Don't like it? You know where the door is. 

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## Maricha75

jld said:


> This is a joke, right?


I certainly hope so. If not, well... 

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## thebirdman

Your friends are guests in your/her home. The fact that she put pants on at all is just being gracious. 

We try to be courteous to any of our guests but when it comes down to it its our house, our rules. Guests who don't like that can leave. 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## Yeswecan

I see no issue here. I have noticed that women hold themselves differently concerning the cut of clothing they are wearing. Sitting in a pair of jeans is certainly different than a mini-skirt. A low cut top when bending over to get something a hand will come up to assure the blouse will not droop down giving someone the thrill of their life. A mini-skirt will elicit a sitting position of legs crossed to keep the glory from view. A pair of jeans will sometimes have crossed legs and sometimes sitting with legs open.


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## Natthewife

As a woman, sitting position is not enough to go on unless coupled with other odd behaviour around other men. 



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## MarriedDude

sgpin84 said:


> So we had some friends over, a few females, and males...so anyway we was all sat, in the living room joking! around having a laugh. My wife was wearing tight jeans.
> 
> she was sat kneeling on the sofa!! you know the usuall kneeling position..with your bum sat on the back of your feet.
> 
> BUT..she was sat with her knees wide apart??? infront of all my mates joking and laughing...!?
> 
> then a week later i had a friend over, my wife was sat on the floor,
> she was speaking to my mate, and yet again sitting knees apart???
> with her hands between her legs??
> 
> and this has happened quite often? my question is for women is this normally how you would sit? or was this inappropriate sitting?
> 
> or maybe am i looking too far in to this??


IDK.....There has got to be something else sending your mind in this direction.....or you have WAY too much free time to analyze your wife's sitting position...

In my work world -we spend many hours on our knees, all 4's, on our behinds...etc...not one time have I looked at a female sitting like that and thought..."oh yeah...she wants me". My wife works with me...she sits like that...sometimes...I think I'll ask her about the hidden meaning...but I imagine I'm gonna get that scooby doo look...

OP- Maybe just try to relax...a little bit


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## MattMatt

sgpin84 said:


> ill explain a bit more in a bit...but this picture is close enough, to give you an example....


The photograph didn't work.

But if your wife looked remotely like this pose, you should start to worry...


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## SunCMars

sgpin84 said:


> ill explain a bit more in a bit...but this picture is close enough, to give you an example....


Lucy! You have "sum splanin" to do.

We are all ears...some tails....dog at my feet.


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## Blondilocks

Why anyone would sit like that on a sofa is beyond me. It's like "get your feet off the sofa, girl". Maybe she needed to spread her legs for balance.

Doctors don't recommend sitting with legs crossed at the knees or the ankles. It affects blood pressure even if it does look dainty and ladylike.

Why don't you ask her why she sits like that? Or, hey, buy a chair.


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## Apexmale

straightshooter said:


> SG,
> 
> Obviously, there is not enough in your post to give you any factual information, but the old sayinmg is "TRUST YOUR GUT". You gut has found whatever she is doing to be concerning enough to you that you went online and are asking a bunch of strangers about this.
> 
> So given that fact, until you post more about her other behavior, I think we need to go under the assumption that YOU. ARE not CRAZY and that your wife is being too suggestive in her behavior.
> 
> So here are a couple of suggestions
> (1) do not say anything yet to her
> (2) Google "sings your wife is cheating". If you are seeing things like guarding her phone, unexplained disappearances, change in appearance, more makeup, "grooming " herself differently, less sex, etc, then you better be concerned.
> (3) if you still are concerned, put a VAR in her car. You will most likely get the information you need within a week
> (4) check your phone bills and look for an unknown number with a lot of texts or call or longer duration calls
> 
> Those might just be starters. If you immediately after two instances talk to her, then if she is up to something she will just hide it better.
> 
> I'd be more concerned for you if you told me the same guy was who she was talking to or if she had a skirt up to her ass on and was flashing him. But then again, remember my first sentence.
> 
> TRUST YOUR GUT!!! Most of the time that works out better. Your WORST enemy can be denial.
> 
> Good luck. If you want more advice from others, I'd suggest more details of what is going on.


I come to TAM to learn HOW to cheat. The knowledge posted in these forums is crucial to planning and conducting a successfull affair.


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## NextTimeAround

Apexmale said:


> I come to TAM to learn HOW to cheat. The knowledge posted in these forums is crucial to planning and conducting a successfull affair.


yeah, l go to cheaters' to learn how cheaters dust their tracks.


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## phillybeffandswiss

NextTimeAround said:


> yeah, l go to cheaters' to learn how cheaters dust their tracks.


LOL. Shhh, let him roll, it is always great.


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## Apexmale

NextTimeAround said:


> yeah, l go to cheaters' to learn how cheaters dust their tracks.


How would you do that?


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## NextTimeAround

OP, if a woman regularly sat provocatively in front of my husband, she would definitely be on my radar as someone to follow / investigate.

I don't think you said whether you noticed her sitting this way before, especially before you two got married. If yes, then you have implicitly given her a green light to continue doing this.


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## Begin again

So, she's like this:










And the men were like this:


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## manfromlamancha

I have 4 sisters, 3 daughters, a wife and a whole bunch of female cousins and nieces - all of whom are complete tomboys!! I kid you not. They sit like men, or even when they are grown up, like kids! So I wouldn't read anything into this. Maybe just explain the etiquette stuff described above.


But if you feel like doing something then

VAR her car!
Take over her PC and key log the hell out of everything!
Separate your finances!
Warn all of your male friends off or else you will tell their wives!
And expose her far and wide! Ummm … on second thought, perhaps not that last one!


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## Maricha75

NextTimeAround said:


> OP, if a woman regularly sat provocatively in front of my husband, she would definitely be on my radar as someone to follow / investigate.
> 
> I don't think you said whether you noticed her sitting this way before, especially before you two got married. If yes, then you have implicitly given her a green light to continue doing this.


I don't see anything provocative about how she sits. Basically, he has implied that she doesn't sit "ladylike"... so what? That does NOT translate to provocative. Even his description doesn't sound provocative. Personally, I think he's reading far more into it than is there. Guaranteed, if I was physically capable of sitting the way he described, I would. Thank God my husband doesn't view it as provocative. Now, if she had the crotch cut out of her jeans and/or was commando, that would be reason for concern. But what he described? No way.

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## Yosemite

I'd be concerned if she had a skirt on with no panties.

But since she was wearing jeans, I'd say you're over the top.


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## Cooper

I see no big deal in sitting like that if she has jeans on, especially in a casual setting among friends. Do people really think it's some sort of hidden invitation to crawl between her legs? Because she sits that way she's a cheater? She's having an affair with one of your mates? She's looking to advertise her goods?

Come on people, can't she just be sitting comfortably in her own home around her friends?


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## sgpin84

something like this....

im not sure what to say lol. alot of people find this normal?
i mean..im sure most us guys... are!! eyes would be wondering..
if a girl sat in this position?


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## Lostinthought61

i think Dr. Freund said it best "sometimes a banana is just a banana" do no seek smoke where there is no fire.


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## Maricha75

sgpin84 said:


> something like this....
> 
> im not sure what to say lol. alot of people find this normal?
> i mean..im sure most us guys... are!! eyes would be wondering..
> if a girl sat in this position?


That's it???? She sits like that??? Oh, ffs. There is nothing provocative at all about that!!! Seriously, if you think she is sitting like this to entice your friends, YOU need to get yourself to a counselor because there is something wrong with your thoughts process!

And, no, no man I know would think anything of a girl or woman sitting like this. This includes my 66 year old father, 35 year old husband, and my 15 year old son. Sgpin84, it is all in your head. This is YOUR issue, not hers.

And I will say it again... I WISH I could sit like that!

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## cutebunny

I don't see anything wrong with that. I always sit like that because I feel comfortable, specially at home.


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## Yosemite

sgpin84 said:


> something like this....
> 
> im not sure what to say lol. alot of people find this normal?
> i mean..im sure most us guys... are!! eyes would be wondering..
> if a girl sat in this position?


You got issues dude.

Enough said.


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## norajane

sgpin84 said:


> something like this....
> 
> im not sure what to say lol. alot of people find this normal?
> i mean..im sure most us guys... are!! eyes would be wondering..
> if a girl sat in this position?


Well, that women IS sitting in that position. Unless you got this from a cat fetish porn site, I don't think she's trying to entice the cat or any men or women into sex. Do you really think that's what this woman is doing? If not, then why do you think your wife is trying to entice people into sex? 

That's the REAL question here. Why do you believe your wife is trying to entice your friends into sex by the way she sits in her own home on the couch or on the floor? Do you suspect her of wanting other men in general?


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## WonkyNinja

sgpin84 said:


> something like this....
> 
> im not sure what to say lol. alot of people find this normal?
> i mean..im sure most us guys... are!! eyes would be wondering..
> if a girl sat in this position?


If I were at a friends house looking at that scenario I wouldn't be able to take my eyes off her cute pvssy.

That is just begging for some attention, like a feather on a stick or a laser pointer.


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## phillybeffandswiss

I was thinking something like Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct, the way you described how she was sitting. Anything remotely like the picture, with or without the hands in the same position, is ridiculously overstated.


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## jamessutton

this is probably more accurate, especially when she sits on the floor..
ive seen men talk to her while shes sat like this. And i see there eyes wondering, down below


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## GTdad

jamessutton said:


> this is probably more accurate, especially when she sits on the floor..
> ive seen men talk to her while shes sat like this. And i see there eyes wondering, down below


You're the face-sitting guy AND the OP, sgpin? 

Isn't school back in session?


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## TX-SC

jamessutton said:


> this is probably more accurate, especially when she sits on the floor..
> ive seen men talk to her while shes sat like this. And i see there eyes wondering, down below


Well, if you take away the seductive facial expression here, I still don't think it's horrible. It's not like she's sporting a camel toe or something.


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## Maricha75

jamessutton said:


> this is probably more accurate, especially when she sits on the floor..
> ive seen men talk to her while shes sat like this. And i see there eyes wondering, down below


Nope. Still not seeing the problem. Although, looking at your other thread, it all makes sense now. You think everyone else is seeing her that way because of your fetish. You are thinking it is provocative because it turns YOU on, due to your fetish. So, again, I will say...NO, there is nothing weird or provocative for a wife to sit in that position around your friends. If she was sitting on them, THEN there would be cause for alarm. But just sitting there? No. And, if you can't distinguish between the two, you need to see a counselor.

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## phillybeffandswiss

Hold Hold on hold on.

So, you just tried to escalate the sexuality of the pose. Really?

...and their eyes wander? So, instead of being upset at the men disrespecting you, which they really aren't, you get mad at your wife? Tell us the truth. Was there an affair on her or your part? Did she cheat on you before? Were you cheated on by another woman? Did you cheat before?

I'm asking because you keep reaching for a reason to be mad and I do not see it.


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## AliceA

If she's attractive it probably wouldn't really matter how she sat, they're going to check her out. There's nothing actually revealing in that pose, since she's in jeans, nothing more than there would be if she was sitting any other way.

I don't really get how the pose could be considered sexy or enticing. Just looks a bit uncomfortable to me.


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## 225985

The wide legs mean your wife is cheating on you with all your mates. What else could it mean?

BTW, yes my eyes would wander there.


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## Yosemite

That belt is too wide.


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## xgyrlx

Lol I wouldn't sit like that in front of my hubbys friends. But maybe she's just comfortable around everyone? 


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## Daisy12

I wouldn't sit like that in front of my husband friends, But I'm not someone who likes to draw attention to themselves. 

If it bothers you just tell her. If my husband told me something as trivial as that bothered him, I wouldn't get upset. I just wouldn't do it anymore out of respect for my husband. 

Sent from my D2206 using Tapatalk


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## mistakesweremade

If all of your friends respect you and your marital boundaries, there shouldn't be an issue whatsoever.


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## CuriousBlue

If it bothers you, tell her.
I think it should.
That's not a ladylike pose.
If she insists, find a way to impress on her that you do not approve and that by insisting on doing that, she is disrespecting your feelings.
You can't stop her, though. She can do what she wants, but it doesn't have to be with you.


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## caruso

It doesn't bother him.

She's not posing in a sexual fashion. In fact, she isn't posing at all.

He doesn't have to stop her and she cannot and will not do what she wants.

Because she doesn't exist.


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