# Another day...another rant(I think)



## Agast84 (Dec 26, 2011)

After continuing oddness, I am at a loss as to what to think of her. 
Maybe I should stop asking questions as to where she is when she calls( hey I hear things in the background I ask where she or anyone is). I am only around her when we do things for the kids. I really don't know if she is dating, but if she is, but saying ("I am at a friend's house." or "at a movie with a friend" it rarely seems plural) Further suspect is the vehicle that is constantly outside her place. I wish she would stop being ridiculous. Is it wrong to ask where she is and what she's up to? I would honestly ask anyone the same thing. I still don't know if it is better to serve her myself or have someone else do it. I don't want to do it to her at where she works, when she has the kids, but I honestly don't know when she is at home and when she isn't. I don't want things to get ugly, I haven't the energy or the life to fight it.


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Agast84 said:


> I still don't know if it is better to serve her myself or have someone else do it. I don't want to do it to her at where she works, when she has the kids, but I honestly don't know when she is at home and when she isn't. I don't want things to get ugly, I haven't the energy or the life to fight it.


Nope, have an official server give it to her at work. Why do you owe her any respect? Has she shown you any? This is the kind of tough love walkaways and waywards need. You have been far too accomodating.

I swear you must be one of the nicest guys I know. Quit it!!


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## Mamatomany (Jan 10, 2012)

I was talking to a friend and people have gotten very clever about serving their spouses. It's even been known to serve them in our state's air space (yes, that counts).


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## unsure78 (Oct 17, 2011)

Agast,

stop asking- I was doing the same thing and all it was hurting was me-


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## Agast84 (Dec 26, 2011)

bandit.45 said:


> Nope, have an official server give it to her at work. Why do you owe her any respect? Has she shown you any? This is the kind of tough love walkaways and waywards need. You have been far too accomodating.
> 
> I swear you must be one of the nicest guys I know. Quit it!!


True. 

I am done. I am talking to a lawyer as soon as I have a free day, which is really soon.


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## Agast84 (Dec 26, 2011)

unsure78 said:


> Agast,
> 
> stop asking- I was doing the same thing and all it was hurting was me-


I don't so much now, but it seems absurd to me that she never sees her actions as suspect,ever. Oh well, lawyer day will happen soon.


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## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

Agast84 said:


> I don't so much now, but it seems absurd to me that she never sees her actions as suspect,ever. Oh well, lawyer day will happen soon.


Seriously, what was her childhood like?


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## Agast84 (Dec 26, 2011)

Conrad said:


> Seriously, what was her childhood like?


Not good. That is all I have to say.


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## cantmove (Feb 20, 2012)

I keep asking my stbxh where he is when he calls as well. I tell myself not to and then I answer the phone say hello and the first thing out of my mouth is "where are you" and it sounds like an accusation. Ugg. I guess when someone cheats on you and doesn't work to repare the damage, the need to know where they are is ingrained. It's rediculous really, they have never and will never tell the truth


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## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

Agast84 said:


> Not good. That is all I have to say.


Do any of you realize how pervasive this thing is?

Selfish neglectful parents beget broken children. They move on to become selfish perhaps abusive parents/spouses. They poison everyone around them.

Wrong is right.


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## Agast84 (Dec 26, 2011)

Conrad said:


> Do any of you realize how pervasive this thing is?
> 
> Selfish neglectful parents beget broken children. They move on to become selfish perhaps abusive parents/spouses. They poison everyone around them.
> 
> Wrong is right.


Another thing, sometimes the one that appears most functional isn't. Too pervasive. She's a better parent than spouse, in some ways.


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## Agast84 (Dec 26, 2011)

cantmove said:


> I keep asking my stbxh where he is when he calls as well. I tell myself not to and then I answer the phone say hello and the first thing out of my mouth is "where are you" and it sounds like an accusation. Ugg. I guess when someone cheats on you and doesn't work to repare the damage, the need to know where they are is ingrained. It's rediculous really, they have never and will never tell the truth


I usually ask everyone. The problem for me is I was labeled as a nut because I often said, "this makes me uncomfortable" or "this looks suspicious, here is why,etc.


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## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

Agast84 said:


> Another thing, sometimes the one that appears most functional isn't. Too pervasive. She's a better parent than spouse, in some ways.


Don't bet on it.


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## Agast84 (Dec 26, 2011)

I don't.


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