# I have been married for 27 years



## neverthought (Apr 10, 2013)

I hope this is the right place for this story. I am maried to an older woman 18 years my senior. I do love her even after what I have done to her. Xmas 2011 I signed up at a dating site on a lark. I never thought anyone would respond to me. Well a few did and I was hooked. Took one woman to dinner. My wife found out. We went to counseling. I was good for 6 months and then a "friend" sent me a link to an overseas dating site. Why the hell I signed up there I'll never know. So I did and I met a woman from a foreign country that I was extremely attracted to. I am shortening this story a bit. I lost my job our friends hate me. her family hates me naturally. I have to live with family because she is living in the house till foreclosure. I have no car and no money. I have been to my girlfriends country a number of times. I know what I did to my wife is awful terrible and any other bad adjective you can think of. I never thought it woul lead to this. Thats the problem I think that I just never thought. Yes she has a lawyer but I'm pretty sure if I sought professional help she would take me back under the right circumstances. When I am with my girlfriend I enjoy myself but I also feel terrible for my wife.for what she is going thru. What I created. When I was with my wife I couldn't help but long for my girlfriend. Yikes! I'm sure there will be plenty of people here to tell me what an ass.... I am. I already know this. My wife asked me once so was it all worth it?


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## tacoma (May 1, 2011)

neverthought said:


> I signed up at a dating site on a lark .... Why the hell I signed up there I'll never know.


I've conveniently highlighted the bull**** in blue so it becomes even more recognizable to other readers than it already is.



> My wife asked me once so was it all worth it?


What was your answer?

What are you here for?

Do you want your wife or your girlfriend?


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## neverthought (Apr 10, 2013)

ok your correct the reason I signed up is obvious I guess. Was it worth it NO! Do I want my wife or GF wow sometimes GF sometimes wife. I feel I owe my wife bigtime though. What am I here for advice,thoughts,help. etc...


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## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

Give your wife the divorce she deserves.

She needs a reliable man.. .a man with integrity.

You're not him.


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## neverthought (Apr 10, 2013)

Debated whether or not I would respond to this Conrad. For 26 years I have been that man. I made a large mistake and I am paying for it it many ways now. For you to say without knowing me that I am not a man of integrity is a lie. What I did was lousy the reason I am here should be obvious. It is because I believe there is that possibility of becoming that man from the last 26 years.


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## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

neverthought said:


> Debated whether or not I would respond to this Conrad. For 26 years I have been that man. I made a large mistake and I am paying for it it many ways now. For you to say without knowing me that I am not a man of integrity is a lie. What I did was lousy the reason I am here should be obvious. It is because I believe there is that possibility of becoming that man from the last 26 years.


You did it twice.

Who says you won't do it again?

If I was her? I wouldn't wait around to find out.


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## C-man (Oct 23, 2012)

OP: You threw out 27 years of marriage to have some selfish short-term fun. Now you regret it and you want back. Ask yourself why your wife would want you back right now? If she looks at you, what do you think she sees? What are your motives for wanting back in? Financial? Because that's how it reads.

BTW, how old are you and how old is your ex-wife? 18 year difference and you stabbed her in the back.

You need to get a job and work on yourself before you even think of reconciling.


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## Pluto2 (Aug 17, 2011)

neverthought said:


> Debated whether or not I would respond to this Conrad. For 26 years I have been that man. I made a large mistake and I am paying for it it many ways now. For you to say without knowing me that I am not a man of integrity is a lie. What I did was lousy the reason I am here should be obvious. It is because I believe there is that possibility of becoming that man from the last 26 years.


Quite simply, a man of integrity would have ended the marriage BEFORE hooking up with other woman. A man without integrity will lie and deceive his spouse for selfish gain, which appears to be what you did.


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

The worst part of this [email protected]#it post is that right now you still only want your wife halfway. You want the stability and comfort your wife offers and the excitement of your gf. Grow up and let your wife go, then enjoy your gf for as long as that lasts.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## neverthought (Apr 10, 2013)

C-man said:


> OP: You threw out 27 years of marriage to have some selfish short-term fun. Now you regret it and you want back. Ask yourself why your wife would want you back right now? If she looks at you, what do you think she sees? What are your motives for wanting back in? Financial? Because that's how it reads.
> 
> BTW, how old are you and how old is your ex-wife? 18 year difference and you stabbed her in the back.
> 
> You need to get a job and work on yourself before you even think of reconciling.


off all the responses I have gotten this one makes the most sense to me. Btw: I am 53 she is 71. Motives, I really f-ed her badly and want to make it right when the time comes. If she will allow it.


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