# The OW still doesn't believe me



## Lovingwife315 (Dec 10, 2012)

She must be more stupid than I thought. She has all the information she needs to know he has been lying to her, and she still wants to see him. What kind of magic spell does he have on us because I am just as stupid!


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## NextTimeAround (Dec 15, 2011)

Lovingwife315 said:


> She must be more stupid than I thought. She has all the information she needs to know he has been lying to her, and she still wants to see him. What kind of magic spell does he have on us because I am just as stupid!


she could just be creating a reason to see him.


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## BjornFree (Aug 16, 2012)

Why do you want to reason with her? You and your husband need to send out a clear signal for her to stay away. If that means a restraining order for civil harassment, so be it. Is your husband being remorseful ?


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## Lovingwife315 (Dec 10, 2012)

my husband and I are seperated living apart . He has not voiced his intention to stop seeing her or R with me, although he won't leave me alone. It is hard for me to set boundries with him, because I love him and want to R. (I tried to kill the affair but since I kicked him out it has come out in the open to me, but his actions with me are being hidden from her) So I wrote her a full disclosure letter, and she doesn't believe me. (or she wouldn't still want to see him) He is a great liar ..............why can I not let go?

BTW he is unBPD


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## Lovingwife315 (Dec 10, 2012)

BTW I call her his girlfriend , he corrects me and says she is not but she is in love with him and they are going to Mexico next month....


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## LetDownNTX (Oct 4, 2012)

A while ago on another forum someone said that her WH who was living with the OW was coming to her house for sex. She took a sharpie and drew a line on his a$$ during sex then told the OW...LMAO

Maybe you could go that route!


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## Lovingwife315 (Dec 10, 2012)

LOL :rofl:

If they saw each other regularly I would do that.....but she lives 3000 miles away and they only see each other every 4-6 weeks or so, which is why they are still in the honeymoon phase! I don't know why I even care, I will never be able to trust him again, it just gets to me that she is still in the picture, I don't want it to get any more serious as I don't ever want my children to meet her....


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

LetDownNTX said:


> A while ago on another forum someone said that her WH who was living with the OW was coming to her house for sex. She took a sharpie and drew a line on his a$$ during sex then told the OW...LMAO
> 
> Maybe you could go that route!


When my h was having an affair I thought of doing something like that.. I was going to sign my name on his ass. But he broke it off so I never got the chance.

Why not sign your name and put a date on it. Write "yum this was good" and then put your name


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Lovingwife315 said:


> LOL :rofl:
> 
> If they saw each other regularly I would do that.....but she lives 3000 miles away and they only see each other every 4-6 weeks or so, which is why they are still in the honeymoon phase! I don't know why I even care, I will never be able to trust him again, it just gets to me that she is still in the picture, I don't want it to get any more serious as I don't ever want my children to meet her....


Well they are going to mexico next month. So just before his trip do it.


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## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

You need to accept that you can't change his behavior or hers. Concentrate on *you*.


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## Regga (Jan 22, 2013)

Openminded is right. Focus on you! It's so effing hard and takes every bit of strength left to move forward alone, but remember you have support here and lots of people with a similar story!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Calibre12 (Nov 27, 2012)

Let him go... The quicker the better. Read the newbie thread by AlmostRecovered, 180 - him no explanation. He will drop her like a hot potato! Give it at least 6 weeks.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Lovingwife315,

Have you read "Surviving an Affair" by Dr. Harley? If not it's probably time you do.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

LetDownNTX said:


> A while ago on another forum someone said that her WH who was living with the OW was coming to her house for sex. She took a sharpie and drew a line on his a$$ during sex then told the OW...LMAO
> 
> Maybe you could go that route!


An indelible felt tip pen works just as well, or so I was told by someone who did it.


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## SadandAngry (Aug 24, 2012)

MattMatt said:


> An indelible felt tip pen works just as well, or so I was told by someone who did it.


Sharpie is a brand name over here for those Matt!


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## Lovingwife315 (Dec 10, 2012)

Thanks everyone.....on the shopping list
1. Sharpies 
2. Surviving the Affair
3. the will power to go NC


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## Lovingwife315 (Dec 10, 2012)

where do I find the "newbie thread"


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## LovesHerMan (Jul 28, 2011)

Lovingwife315 said:


> where do I find the "newbie thread"


Here it is:

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/coping...e-tam-cwi-newbies-please-read.html#post430739


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## Ovid (Oct 11, 2012)

Lovingwife315 said:


> LOL :rofl:
> 
> If they saw each other regularly I would do that.....but she lives 3000 miles away and they only see each other every 4-6 weeks or so, which is why they are still in the honeymoon phase! I don't know why I even care, I will never be able to trust him again, it just gets to me that she is still in the picture, I don't want it to get any more serious as I don't ever want my children to meet her....


There's always a branding iron


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## Ovid (Oct 11, 2012)

Lovingwife315 said:


> Thanks everyone.....on the shopping list
> 1. 180
> 2. Full exposure
> 3. Divorce papers served


Fixed it for you


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## staystrong (Sep 15, 2012)

This thread highlights one of the differences between men and women. 

I can't even conceive of a husband marking his wife's ass to prove to an OM that the wife is still sleeping with him.


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## Lovingwife315 (Dec 10, 2012)

Now just to top things off..... This ***** has no concept of kids and family or she wouldn't come unplanned to see him on Easter!!!!


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## BjornFree (Aug 16, 2012)

So uh did you guys invite her in or...?


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## SaltInWound (Jan 2, 2013)

staystrong said:


> This thread highlights one of the differences between men and women.
> 
> I can't even conceive of a husband marking his wife's ass to prove to an OM that the wife is still sleeping with him.


It took me a while to figure it out, but my husband used to put a mark on my neck every time he went on a ship deployment. So yeah, some of them are desperate enough to mark their wives in some way.


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## Lovingwife315 (Dec 10, 2012)

He lives on his own now....although I really thought he was coming around to realize our marriage is not so far gone....she spent the day/night with him yesterday, and then flew off into the sunrise this morning! 

I am calling a lawyer today. I also had a full STD panel done last week......

Funny though he kept saying " Im so sorry I have ruined your future" and I would say "ours not mine"

But I think I am going change that to "my future is still gonna be as wonderful, only difference is you won't be sharing it with me!"


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## Ovid (Oct 11, 2012)

Lovingwife315 said:


> He lives on his own now....although I really thought he was coming around to realize our marriage is not so far gone....she spent the day/night with him yesterday, and then flew off into the sunrise this morning!
> 
> I am calling a lawyer today. I also had a full STD panel done last week......
> 
> ...


Fixed that one too.


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## LetDownNTX (Oct 4, 2012)

How are you feeling today LovingWife?


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

SadandAngry said:


> Sharpie is a brand name over here for those Matt!


Ah! In the UK a Sharpie is something you do not want to use for that job!


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## mahike (Aug 16, 2011)

I am glad you saw a lawyer. Does not matter if you R or D you need to stop being his doormat.

File for the D right away. Only talk with him about bills and the kids and get yourself into IC.

It seems to me you have self worth issues if you let him treat you and the kiddies that way.

Keep everyone posted on what is going on it will help you keep a log of what is happening and how you are feeling.


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