# Wife wanting to end marriage



## Plaster (Feb 10, 2013)

First, I want to say I wish I found this site A LONG time ago. Reading some threads, seeing the advice given to people in infidelity situations (my situation), finding out these advice are what I am just figuring out for myself down the line, I wish I had brought my problems to the internet to begin with. My scenario is like this:

My wife and I are young couple (I am 26, she 25). We were together for 2 -3 years before we decided to get married. I had to leave the country because of visa (immigration) issues and was away for 2 years. In those 2 years, she came over to visit me and we were together for pretty much the whole of the 2 years. Within that 2 years, we got married and I started making plans to be with her once again. Now, shortly after our marriage, while we were apart, I became an emotional wreck, was always in a mood, bringing up the past (which by the way was not pleasant, but we did not break up. We both done wrongs in the past. But that did not break us up) because I thought I would be denied the chance of ever seeing her again. I found it easier to be pessimistic I will not be given the permission to return and see her again. Said things I regret to this day. So, things got a bit rough between us. But before it got to that stage, she told me of this man in her office who has tried it with all the ladies in the office (married and single) and he constantly gets turned down. Now, he is trying it with her. Since she was going to be leaving the job, the man asked her out to cinema. She told me this, and we both agreed since she was always in the house, stuck hearing her parents bicker, that can she go to the cinema with the man. She assured me nothing can EVER happen. I agreed *(first mistake)*, seeing as he was way older than her (14 years) and she was not going to give him any chance at all. Based on the way she spoke about him. This man even used the line "Hope your boyfriend won't mind" at the end of the text.
Now, shortly after their first meet, we got into the rough patch *(second mistake)*. All started from my end and next thing I know, I was giving her the permission to go with the man again to the cinema *(third mistake)*. I was telling myself she was better off, seeing as I would be denied the chance of seeing her again etc (found it easier and safer to expect the worse). Now, whilst in this rough stage, to my surprise, was issued the visa.
I came back and in the airport was greeted with the news, she got physical with the man. Was hoping it didn't happen, but it did. From that day, she started saying the marriage was a mistake. I could not believe what I was hearing. From then on, it just went down hill.
Now just after couple of months of marriage, she's having an affair with the man. This man has 2 kids and his wife/partner kicked him out of their house way before he met my wife. He knew she had a boyfriend and that she is now married, but I'm guessing because of the way my wife is encouraging him, he is not letting go.
The first mistake I did was to trust she would end things with him in the beginning. She stated she was "weak" around him. Didn't latch onto that and accept it. Instead I was angry that a woman I married is making herself weak around another man. I kinda gave her space *(fourth mistake)*, this only brought them closer to the point they are calling themselves bf and gf. In fact, gave her a lot of space that I agreed not to tell her parents, because I was scared I'll push her away even further. She threatened too that if I should, she'd be angry and I listened *(fifth mistake)*.
Now, it is at the stage the man knows how much she loves him and has threatened to end it if she does not tell her parents, so she told her parents.
Now, I am fighting to save this marriage. She insists it is over, but that the only thing holding her is her parents and family. I know she is angry with me and is building up on it. I also know that if she does not stop seeing this man, things will most likely neverr work with us. I told her this, but she does not want to stop. But she once agreed that she will like to be with me and wishes the man will just end it. That she was not strong enough to.
As I write this, she is with the man now and they are planning to move in together.
Can't sleep, lost appetite, can't focus on work, been putting off going to the gym since not really eating properly again. Can't even focus on my job hunt.

Question is, is it too late to salvage this?
Am I being delusional to think this will ever work?
What do I do especially since I have made a lot of mistakes, out of fear I will be pushing her away?
What can I do?

_I tried to keep it short, apologies if it is too long._


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## JustSomeGuyWho (Dec 16, 2012)

Plaster said:


> *No use in sugar coating it ... *
> 
> Question is, is it too late to salvage this?
> 
> ...


I wish you the best of luck. I hope being served with divorce papers snaps her to her senses but personally, even if it does, is she really the person you want to spend the rest of your life with knowing that she is capable of this? You are very young and believe it or not, despite the stories you read in TAM, there are a lot of women out there with character. Work on yourself.


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## Plaster (Feb 10, 2013)

Cheers for this.
It's just that, can not believe it has got to this stage. I love this girl way more than anything. In the beginning, did not want to give into love. But she kept pushing. We have both done things we aren't proud of in the past, but that did not break us. Why now?
I thought if there's a way to prevent her from seeing the guy or stop the guy seeing her. Maybe talk to him...dunno.
I have thought about going to his house and making a physical point to back off, been told not to.
Just have the belief if they stop seeing each other, we can finally work on our marriage. 
What do you think about me holding out to see if it lasts?


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## JustSomeGuyWho (Dec 16, 2012)

Plaster said:


> Cheers for this.
> It's just that, can not believe it has got to this stage. I love this girl way more than anything. In the beginning, did not want to give into love. But she kept pushing. We have both done things we aren't proud of in the past, but that did not break us. Why now?
> I thought if there's a way to prevent her from seeing the guy or stop the guy seeing her. Maybe talk to him...dunno.
> I have thought about going to his house and making a physical point to back off, been told not to.
> ...


Unless he has something to lose, I don't know how you could stop him from seeing her. A physical confrontation isn't the answer. If he was "happily" married, you could expose to the wife ... but that isn't the case. You could attempt to expose him to HR at his job. 

I guess the answer lies in which version of her you are so in love with. Are you in love with the girl you thought you married or are you in love with the girl who is cheating on you and willing to give you up for another man?

From my point of view, both of you may have made mistakes but this is something altogether different.


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## JustSomeGuyWho (Dec 16, 2012)

Plaster said:


> Cheers for this.
> It's just that, can not believe it has got to this stage. I love this girl way more than anything. In the beginning, did not want to give into love. But she kept pushing. We have both done things we aren't proud of in the past, but that did not break us. Why now?
> I thought if there's a way to prevent her from seeing the guy or stop the guy seeing her. Maybe talk to him...dunno.
> I have thought about going to his house and making a physical point to back off, been told not to.
> ...


Holding out puts her in complete control. She can now choose between her first option, the OM, and her second option, you. There are no consequences. Filing a divorce eliminates those options. She may wake up to reality. Remember, filing does not mean you have to go through with it if she comes back to you for reconciliation and that is what you both want ... but she should be under no illusion that you don't intend to go through with it.


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## Plaster (Feb 10, 2013)

In love with the girl I married. I know she's in there somewhere. Put a lot into this, dis-obeyed a number of people, invested way too much, for it to be over in a number of months. Nightmare!
Trying to find a way to accept it is over. But it just ain't working. Especially since I have **** loads too lose.
Will reporting him to HR do much? Especially since he plans on leaving the job this April. So they could relocate. 
Don't know if she really will quit her new job and relocate with him. But she says she will.
Always picking fights with me at every opportunity. Trying to boss me around. I do all she asks. Starting to feel like a boy in this relationship, not a man, because of Love and do not want to loose her.

When you say, "altogether different", what do you mean exactly?

We still will be living together for about 2 months or so. You reckon I should just not bother trying to show her I still care?

Cheers for your messages by the way


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## Plaster (Feb 10, 2013)

JustSomeGuyWho said:


> Holding out puts her in complete control. She can now choose between her first option, the OM, and her second option, you. There are no consequences. Filing a divorce eliminates those options. She may wake up to reality. Remember, filing does not mean you have to go through with it if she comes back to you for reconciliation and that is what you both want ... but she should be under no illusion that you don't intend to go through with it.


Yeah, see what you mean. Think I've shattered that illusion to begin with. But now, just have to accept it and show her, I know this will definitely cause arguments and maybe make things worse. But hey! Tragic, I should have kept my mouth shut and believed. Kept a lid on my emotions etc


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

I think all things considered you move on. Find a woman who can be faithful to you.

Yes indeed you agreed to let her date another. Don't do that again with any woman.


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## Plaster (Feb 10, 2013)

So basically, lesson learn here is, most women are are weak. Didn't think he had a chance. She knew what he was after, sex. He was way older than her. We were married. Figured all that would have provided enough obstacles to cheat.
Now, I must not trust a woman to go into the wild on her own and come back in one piece. Powerful lessons.
So will you say I should forget planning some valentine related events?


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

Plaster said:


> So basically, lesson learn here is, most women are are weak. Didn't think he had a chance. She knew what he was after, sex. He was way older than her. We were married. Figured all that would have provided enough obstacles to cheat.
> Now, I must not trust a woman to go into the wild on her own and come back in one piece. Powerful lessons.
> So will you say I should forget planning some valentine related events?


I would not say most women are weak. I would say people have to have very strong boundaries and putting oneself in risky situations is a bad idea.

I found that ego will drive people to think that their character will protect them. But that is very naive. What most people do not udnerstand is that dating others is dangerous. It is amting ritual and compromies our thinking due to the brain chemicals. It becomes an addiction.

You should let your women into the wild. You are supposed to c0ckblock.

Letting a woman date another man demonstates low value to a woman. It comes off as weak, ambivalent and / or naive. Not attractive.

But yes indeed hopefully this is a lesson learned.


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## dzd&confused (Nov 27, 2012)

Yes, plan nothing unless you want to invest more time and emotions into someone who is not doing the same for you. Remember you deserve to be respected and loved. Is she on the internet asking how to fix a marriage? NO. Shes planning her future with someone else. Dont make mistakes that will only hurt you further? Dont do it. Care for yourself.

How long are you willing to wait around while she is with someone else? 

What do you think the marriage would look like if she did come back?

She is insisting it is over, so give her the end. I was in the lawyers office when I filied crying because my heart was crushed but I could NOT be in a marriage with 3 people.


"Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference"

Take control of YOUR future. You have no control over her or hers.


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## dzd&confused (Nov 27, 2012)

and dude - your 26. You have so much future to capitalize on. Dont waste some of your best younger years with someone who dosnt value marriage and you.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Plaster said:


> So basically, lesson learn here is, most women are are weak. Didn't think he had a chance. She knew what he was after, sex. He was way older than her. We were married. Figured all that would have provided enough obstacles to cheat.
> Now, I must not trust a woman to go into the wild on her own and come back in one piece. Powerful lessons.
> So will you say I should forget planning some valentine related events?


Why? What the heck would a card and perhaps a romantic meal cost you?


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## Count of Monte Cristo (Mar 21, 2012)

MattMatt said:


> Why? What the heck would a card and perhaps a romantic meal cost you?


Self-respect comes to mind.


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## Tony55 (Jun 8, 2012)

Plaster said:


> What can I do?


Your best shot at anything positive is to do the opposite of what you feel you should do. You feel like you should pursue her. Don't. That will only push her further away. You need to turn your back on her and tell yourself she no longer exist. If she comes to you, then you decide if you want her. DO NOT PURSUE HER. Save yourself from more suffering.

It's time to be a man, focus on your life, your job, your future. She is gone, accept this. Don't blame yourself too much, you were in a different country, there was little you could have done. If she truly loved you she would have waited until you returned, she should never have asked to go out with another man. If you would have told her no, she would have resented you and accused you of not trusting her. You could not win, the moment she desired to spend time with another man, you lost.

Sorry.

T


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## Count of Monte Cristo (Mar 21, 2012)

Plaster said:


> We were married. Figured all that would have provided enough obstacles to cheat.


Look at from the OM's perspective: you loaned him your wife knowing what a sleaze ball he is - what did you expect?

Kind of like that parable about the scorpion that bit the man that saved its life. When asked why he bit his savior, he simply said 'it's my nature.'

Let this be a lesson to you. Don't lend things that you value and would like returned in one piece.


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## TeaLeaves4 (Feb 19, 2010)

Plaster said:


> So basically, lesson learn here is, most women are are weak. Didn't think he had a chance. She knew what he was after, sex. He was way older than her. We were married. Figured all that would have provided enough obstacles to cheat.
> Now, I must not trust a woman to go into the wild on her own and come back in one piece. Powerful lessons.
> So will you say I should forget planning some valentine related events?


No, YOUR woman was weak. And living apart all this time hasn't served to strengthen your relationship. 

Sorry you are in this situation.


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

Your wife wasn't weak, she is an adult and has chosen an old man who hits on everything over you.

At this point you have lost her. I say that because it frees you to take nuclear actions to try to end the affair.

Why do you believe she's leaving that job? She's got her OM there.

1. Go after them at work, both professionally and socially.
Exposé the affair to HR and the other workers. They know how he is,try to make her dating and cheating with him humiliating.

You say she's leaving, so you won't be harming her job, but just might harm his job.

2. Tell her parents yourself. Tell them the truth so they know it, not just the version she told.

Btw, since you are foreign, it could be her parents are using this affair to end the marriage to you.

See, the relationship with this old guy has no chance long term. He's going to be broke paying child support, and he is a cheater himself. He'll be cheating on you wife before long.

3. You need to find and contact his wife. You may not know the whole story. Find her and tell her.

4. Post the OM on cheaterville.com

5. Learn from this. Giving your spouse permission to go on dates alone with a known player is just plain stupid.


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## hookares (Dec 7, 2011)

dzd&confused said:


> and dude - your 26. You have so much future to capitalize on. Dont waste some of your best younger years with someone who dosnt value marriage and you.


This is good advice.Just try to do a better job of choosing when you begin dating one or more of the other three billion other women on this planet.


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## Count of Monte Cristo (Mar 21, 2012)

Shaggy said:


> Your wife wasn't weak, she is an adult and has chosen an old man....the relationship with this old guy has no chance long term.


Shaggy, according to my math, this guy is only 39 years old. Hardly an old man.

(BTW, I'll be 50 in a few days and in the best shape of my life and don't consider myself old. In fact, AARP sent me a card and application that I promptly tossed in the trash bin - I don't need the discounts that much.)


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## TRy (Sep 14, 2011)

Plaster said:


> I know this will definitely cause arguments and maybe make things worse.


 How exactly could it be any worse? She is cheating on you with an affair partner (AP) where they openly refer to each other as boyfriend and girlfriend. She tells you that she is making plans to move in with him. After telling you that you better not tell her parents or she will be angry with you, she tells her parents about them when her AP demands that she tell him; he did this to show you that with your wife he is in charge and to humiliate you. Just how much disrespect to you as a man can you take exactly?

She cannot be in love with someone that she does not respect. As long as you do not respect yourself, there is zero chance anyone will respect you. Learn from the AP. He gets respect because he demands it. Respect is not given, it is taken. He felt disrespected by her not telling her parents about them and was willing to end things if she did not tell them. 

It is probably too late to save your marraige, but your best chance is to go out with some class and file for divorce and mean it. Do not even consider taking her back unless she comes begging and even then do not accept her back right away. She will test your resolve by offering you a few words of hope and false reconciliation, but this is just to see if she can hold onto you as a backup plan and to reaffirm to herself that you are in fact not worthy of her respect.


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## akashNil (May 20, 2012)

Let her go. You are too young. 

She got a man 14 years elder than her? Go get a girl 7 years younger than you. 

Let your WW see what kind of man you are.


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## JustSomeGuyWho (Dec 16, 2012)

Plaster said:


> In love with the girl I married. I know she's in there somewhere. Put a lot into this, dis-obeyed a number of people, invested way too much, for it to be over in a number of months. Nightmare!
> Trying to find a way to accept it is over. But it just ain't working. Especially since I have **** loads too lose.
> Will reporting him to HR do much? Especially since he plans on leaving the job this April. So they could relocate.
> Don't know if she really will quit her new job and relocate with him. But she says she will.
> ...


I have news for you ... the girl you see now IS the girl that you married. The girl you are in love with is the girl you THOUGHT you married. She has revealed herself. 

You are putting her on a pedestal she doesn't belong on. This isn't a mistake ... she is a married woman who has a bf and flaunts it. She is stringing you along and you don't stand up for yourself because you think ... maybe she'll come back to me? In her mind, she is not married to you except maybe in legal status alone. 

From an outsiders perspective, an objective perspective that isn't tainted from emotions I feel for her, you have nothing to lose. You have already lost her and she is not worth trying to get back. Whatever you might lose monetarily, you are young enough to recover from. 

Many years ago in New Zealand I went bungee jumping for the first time. I remember standing on a plank midway across a bridge looking way down at the river below. The boat they were going to use to pick me up looked tiny from that height. My knees were weak and my heart was pounding. What I wanted to do was to back off and tell the guy I wasn't going to do it. The "right thing to do" would be to jump ... that is what I came there to do. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and with weak knees and all, I jumped. Once I was flying through the air, I was no longer scared ... what is done was done and I couldn't change it ... and I felt incredible! I think you know what has to be done ... what the right thing to do is ... jump.

File for divorce, see what happens, enjoy your life.


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## Aunt Ava (Jan 24, 2013)

Plaster said:


> So basically, lesson learn here is, most women are are weak. Didn't think he had a chance. She knew what he was after, sex. He was way older than her. We were married. Figured all that would have provided enough obstacles to cheat.
> Now, I must not trust a woman to go into the wild on her own and come back in one piece. Powerful lessons.
> So will you say I should forget planning some valentine related events?


No, you are wrong. She has no boundaries, it has nothing to do with being weak. Someone that cheats on you this early in a relationship has no respect for you. You may love her, but she doesn't love you. 
Walk away, try to find your self respect and heal. There are a lot of quality women out there that would never cheat...you chose poorly.


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## warlock07 (Oct 28, 2011)

Why do you want such a disgusting woman ? Yuck!!


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## Aunt Ava (Jan 24, 2013)

warlock07 said:


> Why do you want such a disgusting woman ? Yuck!!


:iagree: 
Why on earth would you want to stay with someone like this? She has shown you who she is...


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## TDSC60 (Dec 8, 2011)

Like Warlock and Aunt Ava says, why do you want her?

Answer - you want the fantasy that you thought she was - a loving, honest, compassionate woman. You have to accept that the person you love does not exist.

You cannot accept that now she is this lying, cheating, ****, who is in love with a man who cheated on his wife and two kids. This is who she is today. 

You KNOW this but are not ready to accept the truth. Move on. Soon you will feel lucky to be rid of her and all the drama she brings with her.


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## walkonmars (Aug 21, 2012)

Thank your lord that you have no children. That would make it so much worse. Walk or better yet, RUN from this relationship with you dignity in tact. 

Don't have ANY conversations with this creature. Absolutely no sentimental "goodbyes" or "I'll wait for yous"


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## carmen ohio (Sep 24, 2012)

Plaster said:


> Cheers for this.
> It's just that, can not believe it has got to this stage. I love this girl way more than anything. In the beginning, did not want to give into love. But she kept pushing. We have both done things we aren't proud of in the past, but that did not break us. Why now?
> I thought if there's a way to prevent her from seeing the guy or stop the guy seeing her. Maybe talk to him...dunno.
> I have thought about going to his house and making a physical point to back off, been told not to.
> ...


Dear Plaster,

As Tony55 told you, the wrong way to go about this is to pursue your WW and try to coax her into coming back. That will only make you look weaker than you already do in her eyes for letting her go out with another man, not just once but even after you realized there was something going wrong in your marriage.

Ironically, the way that will give you the best chance of winning her back is also the best way to get over her as quickly as possible. It is (and it should be done in this order): (1) file for divorce, (2) tell her that you have filed because you will not tolerate a wife who cheats; (3) do everything you can do to improve your physical appearance (working out, new clothes, etc.), (4) start doing things that you enjoy and, eventually, (5) start dating again.

If you do these things all the while maintaining a cheerful demeanor around your WW (the point being for her to see you moving on with minimal regret about losing her), there is a chance that she will start to realize what she is losing and ask you to take her back. But, even if she doesn't, you will be on your way to finding a woman more deserving of your love.

The sooner you start to move on without her, the sooner you will heal. The longer you pine for her and dream about her returning, the more you will suffer. Healing is good. Suffering is bad.

By the way, read "The Married Man Sex Life Primer" by Athol Kay and start putting his principles to work in your life.

Good luck.


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)




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## Plaster (Feb 10, 2013)

Cheers for this everybody. Thanks a lot, you have no idea.

Yes, I have learnt a massive lesson. The only reason I agreed for her to go out with him was because, I seriously thought he had no chance, he also was a colleague and a number of her colleagues were planning on a leaving-go party for her (since she was leaving the job). She said so herself. Everybody literally laughs at him in the office (so she says) AND I thought the massive age gap and kids etc would have been enough barriers. Add to the fact that we are married. 
I knew his intentions, made it clear to her. She knew herself, but chose to do it.

I have tried and still trying to move on, or to show I can. But it really is HARD and I have been looking forward to this, sacrificed a lot, left my country of origin (pretty much severed all professional ties back home), went against peoples advice etc, to be with her.
Funny thing is, I knew I wasn't ready for this marriage, told her, she insisted. But I felt I sounded selfish and agreed to do it. Now, don't understand.
I have put my all into this (no doubt we both have). Now, I am currently on a spouse visa and do not want to go back. Go back and face the embarrassment, the "I told you so" speech etc. Had good job offers, now don't know what's going happen. Back to square one again (heaven forbid).
Odd, but reading from you guys keeps the moral high. Part of the reason I'm trying to get with her still, is because, I feel I have loads to loose here. Funny thing about it all is that she knows this too. Start to question is we were ever in Love and all this from a silly argument that could have been easily prevented.
Now, she is adding up all the wrongs that has happened in our relationship in the past. Just to justify her decision when she feels guilty.
It really is just a nightmare. Did not have any back up plan AT ALL and it's like I'm just out of moves (I hope not), limited options etc.
Worst f**king situation of my LIFE!


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## Plaster (Feb 10, 2013)

Count of Monte Cristo said:


> Look at from the OM's perspective: you loaned him your wife knowing what a sleaze ball he is - what did you expect?
> 
> Kind of like that parable about the scorpion that bit the man that saved its life. When asked why he bit his savior, he simply said 'it's my nature.'
> 
> Let this be a lesson to you. Don't lend things that you value and would like returned in one piece.


Know what you mean. But did not expect MY WIFE, of ALL people to fall for him. 
2bh, their workplace did set up a staff social night, he made his move and I warned her against it. He works in the same place.
For the majority of the 2 years we were apart, she was ok. Why does it have to be when I had just a week left to get back, then she started this? Why was it a day before I arrived, then she decided to offer him some sort of sexual favour? All because we argued via messaging, I was in a mood, kept bringing up the past etc.
I am stronger than that, will not let another woman steal my heart like that. Wasn't ready for this, she knows. I did it anyway and committed myself. Jumped in believing she will always have my back when the going gets tough. 
Now it is and she is leaving me out and cold. Telling me it's either me or her that will have to be thrown "under the bus". My under the bus being, start from scratch etc again. Hers, she might loose the man (a man who is not looking to stay. Who is telling her he will not wait for her. Who does not care if she goes or stays).
If this ain't pure evil, I don't know what else comes close.


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## Kallan Pavithran (Jan 17, 2012)

Dont you have any self respect?

I hate cheaters but seeing this kind of self respectless people makes me think differently.
For her you are needy, self respect less man, she dont want to spend her rest of the life with you. Be a man and act like a real man, she will follow you else she will use your love to wipe her a$$.


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## Plaster (Feb 10, 2013)

Kallan Pavithran said:


> Dont you have any self respect?
> 
> I hate cheaters but seeing this kind of self respectless people makes me think differently.
> For her you are needy, self respect less man, she dont want to spend her rest of the life with you. Be a man and act like a real man, she will follow you else she will use your love to wipe her a$$.


Yeah! You're right!


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## outNabout (Mar 2, 2013)

Is your worst fear that people will say told you so? That her cheating looks bad on you somehow? I think you should be aware of how she has violated your trust and her vows. Move on and let it be her mistake, not yours.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

Why do hold on to the idea that this started when she says it did?

Cheaters lie. That's one thing you can count on.

Get away from this horrible person and regain your self respect.

There is no shame in being lied to and cheated on. That shame is on the person who did it. The shame for the victim comes from how they react to it.


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## Plaster (Feb 10, 2013)

outNabout said:


> Is your worst fear that people will say told you so? That her cheating looks bad on you somehow? I think you should be aware of how she has violated your trust and her vows. Move on and let it be her mistake, not yours.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Nah, the worst fear is having to start all over. In every respect I can think of. Career, life, etc. Practically gave everybody "the finger", who dare say anything negative about my decision in the past.
Fear that most opportunities that were offered then, probably won't be offered noow. 

A lot!


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## Plaster (Feb 10, 2013)

Shaggy said:


> Why do hold on to the idea that this started when she says it did?
> 
> Cheaters lie. That's one thing you can count on.
> 
> ...


Cheers. Thought so .
Sad though, I have reacted in pretty ****y ways looking back now


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## ThePheonix (Jan 3, 2013)

Plaster said:


> Question is, is it too late to salvage this?
> Am I being delusional to think this will ever work?
> What do I do especially since I have made a lot of mistakes, out of fear I will be pushing her away?
> What can I do?


Plaster, of course its too late. You can't do anything to push her away. She's already gone; if she was ever there in the first place, which I doubt. Pack your bags.


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## AlphaHalf (Aug 5, 2012)

Future reference, Never let another man take your wife out on a date, (regardless of age, looks, financial status) That's your job.


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## alte Dame (Aug 7, 2012)

The things to be afraid of in life are ravaging war, terminal illness, solitary confinement. You're a young man with a problem that you will survive.

Hold your head up. Tell her where to get off. Go home and stand up like the man you are, give the people at home the respect they deserve by telling them they were right about her, and that you are back and restarting your life without her.

Believe me, you will survive her cr*p. Find your pride. Stand up like the man you are. No more fear of inconsequential things.


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