# chastity



## Changecage (Jan 14, 2020)

what do people think about chastity cages.


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## Young at Heart (Jan 6, 2015)

It is one of many, many kinks out there that some couples enjoy.

It probably depends on why you are interested in wearing such a device.


Is the desire to have someone else in control of your sexuality?
Is there a desire to surrender control and be submissive and manipulated by someone else?
Is the desire to have something stronger than your good intentions to stop behaviors you want to change? (Porn, masturbation, cheating on your SO, ???)
Is the desire to somehow punish or deny yourself sex?
Is the desire to prove to you SO that they can touch you without it leading to sex
Is this some weird form of birth control that your SO only unlocks you when she is not in the fertile part of her cycle?

There could be a lot of reasons and the reasons you want to experiment with chastity. Even if your SO wants to play with chastity, her reasons might be quite different and incompatible with yours.

Whatever the reasons, you need to talk it over with you SO and if you aren't good at talking to them about sex or sexual things, it may be a struggle.

Personally, it would not be my thing. I want to make love with my wife to emotionally bond with my wife more than I get. I struggled to get out of a sex starved marriage and turn it around into a loving sexual marriage. A chastity cage seems to be about giving up whatever full to limited control of ones own sexuality. 

Which is not my thing, but it is one of many kinks that people seem to enjoy. So to each their own and good luck.


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

Changecage said:


> what do people think about chastity cages.


What do you think about them and why do you want to know?


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## No Longer Lonely Husband (Nov 3, 2015)

Changecage said:


> what do people think about chastity cages.


Well dumb me, I had to look up what it was. That is stupid as hell IMHO. To each their own I guess.


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

No Longer Lonely Husband said:


> Well dumb me, I had to look up what it was. That is stupid as hell IMHO. To each their own I guess.


Not my cup of tea


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## manwithnoname (Feb 3, 2017)

You've started 6 threads and abandoned the majority of them. 

I think chastity cages are stupid, but I would approve of a chastity cage for your posting abilities.


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## Talker67 (Apr 7, 2016)

we all vote that if your wife puts one on you, that she needs to wear the key around her neck, and brag about it to all of her GFs.

but since your wife still needs to have sex herself, i would assume she is forcing you into a cuckold lifestyle too. or is about to do so. So the cage helps her to humiliate you sexually. Some guys love that


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## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

That’s a very personal choice so why does it matter what others think.


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## Livvie (Jan 20, 2014)

I don't.


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## ElOtro (Apr 4, 2021)

Diana7 said:


> Not my cup of tea


May I say "neither my cup of........coffee"? 😀


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

Changecage said:


> what do people think about chastity cages.


I think it's a definite positive for keeping select men from reproducing.


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## happyhusband0005 (May 4, 2018)

Seems like it would be painful.


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## ThatDarnGuy! (Jan 11, 2022)

In marriage, as long as both agree to it and it doesn't harm anyone. I don't think there is anything too freaky.


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## thunderchad (12 mo ago)

Do you want to watch your wife get banged by other men...because I see where this is going already.


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## Talker67 (Apr 7, 2016)

thunderchad said:


> Do you want to watch your wife get banged by other men...because I see where this is going already.


i would assume this is exactly what he wants.
there are some porn sites where this is exactly what the husband wants. the more he is humiliated, usually the more he likes it.

i would bet if you statistically evaluated all the posters on those boards, i would bet that 90% of them are divorced 5 years later. It is not a sustainable kink...


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## thunderchad (12 mo ago)

This can only end in disaster. Just do some searches on here.


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## thunderchad (12 mo ago)

Dang he's gone.


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## trophy_husband (11 mo ago)

I was brought to this sight after doing searches on "Karezza," then I bumped into this thread. Cool!

Well, I'm excited that I can explain what the hell male chastity is all about. Years ago I remember seeing a chastity cage in porn on accident. I wanted to unsee it kind of like when you have seen videos of a car crash or someone dying and wish that you hadn't seen it. But I couldn't get it out of my head. I was drawn into it at first I guess as a kink. And you can get entry level ones to play with on amazon for like $30. At first my wife was horrified by the idea and then grew to like it and we both grew to enjoy it as a kink. Then as I got into it more I bumped into the science behind it and it all made complete sense and made me further lean in on this as a lifestyle really and not as much of just a kink anymore.

Basically it permanently puts you in courting mode. Men love to chase and women love to be chased. So it is like having the security of a long solid marriage with the excitement of just meeting someone for the first time. Give a man an orgasm and he will forget about it immediately. Deny a man an orgasm and he will never stop thinking about it. Does that start to make at least a little sense?

Ok - that was the abridged explanation that you should be able to relate to from your own life experiences. Here is the science behind it.
--------------------------

Orgasm denial impacts 3 major hormones that affect our mood:

*Dopamine *- the neurotransmitter that causes the feeling of pleasure we receive from engaging in certain activities. Sexual arousal (or the chase thereof), the eating of calorie rich foods, and for some people, certain other behaviors like gambling or shopping.

*Prolactin *- the neurotransmitter of satiation; it applies the brakes on the level and duration of dopamine and oxytocin. Prolactin levels generally remain stable in the reward center of the brain except during orgasm when they are substantially increased to deal with (i.e counteract or reduce the level of) the sudden flood of dopamine and oxytocin.

*Oxytocin *- often called the “cuddle hormone,” when the level is elevated, produces the pleasurable feeling of bonding or “connectedness,” as well as feelings of closeness, devotion and protection. It is the primary factor in establishing the basis for pair bonding.

Basically, men are rewarded with dopamine by pursuing an orgasm and the dopamine grand prize is an orgasm itself. However, prolactin then kicks in and shuts down your dopamine buzz so the man can reset a new goal of distributing his gene pool to another female conquest. By not having an orgasm (combined with affection and pursuit), your dopamine levels are above average and because it is reset less often, your receptors are more sensitive too. So the escalated dopamine puts us in a good mood and supports all of the ways we want to improve ourselves help out wives / girlfriends and family. The oxytocin makes us want to be more affectionate. We get oxytocin rushes just from touching or massaging the female which we are chasing which make us more horny which keeps the loop going.

end of science stuff
------------------
So male chastity doesn't take away the sex - it just takes away the orgasm. In fact, there will be far more intimacy and sex in a chastity relationship. Ultimately, the man will have an orgasm at some point. And it will be ****ing awesome. What precedes that is teasing and anticipation. It could be after a day / night of play or days leading up or it go on for weeks / months if you get into the lifestyle end of things.

With chastity, you are always courting your woman and think how you have behaved in “courting mode” previously. So in chastity, you get a secure relationship but the constant romantic chase at the same time. Chastity could be on the vanilla end of the spectrum or get way way kinky. You and your partner's kinks will emerge and you’ll find it easier to communicate under these circumstances so you can take it wherever you want now that you’ve harnessed the male sex drive.

When it goes beyond the short term thing, an important component is that there is constant sexual tension. I crave to give my wife back / body / footrubs. I crave to go down on her and use toys while locked up. I leave no mess and get her a baby wipe to clean up when we're done as she drifts off and I massage her feet.

Typically we'll break out of the the lifestyle every few months due to life getting in the way. Even I am amazed the trance like state being denied can put me in. I still find my wife attractive and want to give her footrubs / body rubs and go down on her. But when I am denied, I send her calendar invites to go down on her and and am like a dazed highschool boy in love when she accepts. It's pretty ****ing cool.

As to kink or not a kink. Don't think of it that way, just think of a man not having an orgasm. From there each man or couple will take their own path. Chastity in itself is a submissive act, but at the end of the day, it is just a utility throttling up the male sex drive and each person will point their sex drive in different directions etc. For some it will be whips and latex for others it will be date night dinner and a play or show your wife likes while locked up etc. And instead of the date night ending with a male orgasm, it could be your nude wife laying on the bed being worshiped with a long body massage. Sigh. 

Oh, on the painful or note. Nah, not at all. If the cage is just a tad smaller than your flacid penis size, it is comfortable and not noticeable after a little use. It needs to be just a tad shorter than flacid penis size because you want to stop the bonner before it turns into a run away train. That is another point. I spend a significant majority of my day being aroused, trying to get erect. It is so wild to feel the cage push back. it is like my wife is there with me constantly. Any sexual thought I have, my **** starts to engorge and then I feel the cage tighten and it is like my wife's hand stopping me or my wife is the little devil (or angel) on my shoulder and goes "nah nah nah - no boners for you hubby. I didn't say you could ... yet" ; ).

Ok ... well, so much for me learning more about Karezza (I'm trying to tie it into Chastity btw). A google search brought me here an hour ago and no I'm signed up and replied with this long ass post. I hope this brought some sanity to why one would want to get into chastity. I look forward to hear thoughts / questions.

Now go play with your hormones!

Cheers!
TH


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## Talker67 (Apr 7, 2016)

trophy_husband said:


> I was brought to this sight after doing searches on "Karezza," then I bumped into this thread. Cool!
> 
> Well, I'm excited that I can explain what the hell male chastity is all about. Years ago I remember seeing a chastity cage in porn on accident. I wanted to unsee it kind of like when you have seen videos of a car crash or someone dying and wish that you hadn't seen it. But I couldn't get it out of my head. I was drawn into it at first I guess as a kink. And you can get entry level ones to play with on amazon for like $30. At first my wife was horrified by the idea and then grew to like it and we both grew to enjoy it as a kink. Then as I got into it more I bumped into the science behind it and it all made complete sense and made me further lean in on this as a lifestyle really and not as much of just a kink anymore.
> 
> ...


dude, T.M.I.


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## Lostinthought61 (Nov 5, 2013)

there is an old story that when king Arthur was leaving Camelot to fight in a battle he took Merlin aside and said that he had this suspicion that Guinevere was cheating on him so he placed a chastity belt on her and said to Merlin, " i want to you to hold on to this key, and if i should not come back then i will allow you to release her to her bond with me"... "Okay my King, i will protect this with my life" 

Having felt like he was ready to leave now, Arthur and the rest of the knights set forth for battle.....not two miles outside the castle...Merlin comes running up on horseback, screaming " you left me the wrong key"


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## Mr.Married (Feb 21, 2018)

It’s a great way to convince yourself it’s the reason your wife isn’t F’ing you.

That is the dumbest chit I’ve ever heard. I like nailing a$$ not chaining up my junk.

You can have your [email protected] cage … all of them. They are all yours 

🤢


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## Tested_by_stress (Apr 1, 2021)

How do you avoid urinating on your shoes? Asking for a friend.


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

I had no idea this was a thing that existed. Learned a new thing today. Calling it a win.


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## BigDaddyNY (May 19, 2021)

Read all of @Changecage posts and you will see this is just the last attempt to fix "performance" issues he is having. He thinks it is because his sex life has become boring. It has absolutely nothing to do with his 20+ years of porn use and I'm sure this hairbrained idea didn't come from all the porn he watches.


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## No Longer Lonely Husband (Nov 3, 2015)

BigDaddyNY said:


> Read all of @Changecage posts and you will see this is just the last attempt to fix "performance" issues he is having. He thinks it is because his sex life has become boring. It has absolutely nothing to do with his 20+ years of porn use and I'm sure this hairbrained idea didn't come from all the porn he watches.


Got to wonder....WTF...who in his right mind would want his weenie in a cage!?


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

No Longer Lonely Husband said:


> Got to wonder....WTF...who in his right mind would want his weenie in a cage!?


Did we learn nothing from the zipper scene in “There’s Something About Mary”? 😂


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## No Longer Lonely Husband (Nov 3, 2015)

TexasMom1216 said:


> Did we learn nothing from the zipper scene in “There’s Something About Mary”? 😂


ROTFLMAO


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## Talker67 (Apr 7, 2016)

i still wince from that zipper scene


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

Talker67 said:


> i still wince from that zipper scene


Me too and I’m not even completely sure why, I have no frame of reference. It’s just awful, who saw that and said, “know what would do it for me? An Iron Maiden for my peep!” Yikes, y’all.


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

Talker67 said:


> i still wince from that zipper scene


Thats the only scene I've seen of that movie.😵‍💫

I've heard a lot about it though.😉


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

BigDaddyNY said:


> Read all of @Changecage posts and you will see this is just the last attempt to fix "performance" issues he is having. He thinks it is because his sex life has become boring. It has absolutely nothing to do with his 20+ years of porn use and I'm sure this hairbrained idea didn't come from all the porn he watches.


Yeah. Getting in shape, trying a vegan diet and staying away from porn probably wouldn't do a thing but a male chastity device? Sure! That's a winner for performance...😳


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

trophy_husband said:


> Orgasm denial impacts 3 major hormones that affect our mood:
> 
> *Dopamine *- snip
> *Prolactin *- snip
> ...


So, basically, this mechanism is engaged when edging and this is why edging is so fun for DH. Sweet!


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

MJJEAN said:


> So, basically, this mechanism is engaged when edging and this is why edging is so fun for DH. Sweet!


Perv.😉


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## Tested_by_stress (Apr 1, 2021)

Well.......now I have to google "edging"! Lol


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

ConanHub said:


> Perv.😉


Well, duh!

Also, edging and/or rope (Shibari) play is a great way to keep the bond and intimacy going when some random injury or illness prevents sex for weeks. Or so I've heard.


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## trophy_husband (11 mo ago)

Tested_by_stress said:


> How do you avoid urinating on your shoes? Asking for a friend.


Hah! The kind I have, and the kind most get I think - you can go standing up at a urinal in public etc.


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## Talker67 (Apr 7, 2016)

Online they are recommending THIS device. 









Cellmate: Male chastity gadget hack could lock users in


The Chinese maker of the toy has updated the app involved, but some users remain at risk.



www.bbc.com


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## lisag77079 (4 mo ago)

Changecage said:


> what do people think about chastity cages.


We do not use cages but we practice male orgasm denial. We started out slow, one every week, then a month, and finally a year. He told me he is ready to commit to never getting off. It has made our sex life amazing. He gets played with more than almost any married man, he just does not get off.


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

lisag77079 said:


> We do not use cages but we practice male orgasm denial. We started out slow, one every week, then a month, and finally a year. He told me he is ready to commit to never getting off. It has made our sex life amazing. He gets played with more than almost any married man, he just does not get off.


Just a question, why would any man not want to ever have an organism?


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## BigDaddyNY (May 19, 2021)

lisag77079 said:


> We do not use cages but we practice male orgasm denial. We started out slow, one every week, then a month, and finally a year. He told me he is ready to commit to never getting off. It has made our sex life amazing. He gets played with more than almost any married man, he just does not get off.


Torture and humiliation, nothing more.


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

BigDaddyNY said:


> Torture and humiliation, nothing more.


How sad.


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