# The Sister in Law straight from hell



## maggierose

Where do i begin and how do I describe this evil one? I'll take you back to the beginning. She came along dating my brother seemed very sweet, always brought something to my parents house showered everyone with smiles. I started to see warning signs when she became bridezilla and then got "hurt" at work and stopped working. She became a nasty mooch who was taking my brother for granted in every way possible. Well no surprises here she gets pregnant real fast, so needless to say it was one party after the next, engagement, bridal shower, wedding, baby shower, christening it was all about her her her meanwhile in the midst of this I got engaged well she had the nerve to complain that I scheduled my engagement party the week before she scheduled the baby's 1st bday party, are you kiddin me? meanwhile my fiance was in the army and i had to schedule it around his time off. So the saga continues, my fiance came home I moved to PA from NY, I have been living here for 4 months and my brother has not even mentioned coming out to see me, cause she complains that it is too far, by the way its only an hour and 45 min drive. Well a few weeks ago my mother wanted to go out for mothers day and sis in law throws a fit that she doesnt like the place my mom picked and we wind up having to go her house so I drive in. I suggested having fathers day at my apartment and here she goes again throwing a fit that my brother has work the next day and its too much to drive in so now my father really wants to come here but won't cause he wants everyone to be together. So i'm stuck driving in AGAIN meanwhile the weekend before is a christening for a close cousin that I have to respond no to now cause I can't drive in 2 weeks in a row. Im so fed up and angry that I don't even want to go in for father's day now and I know that would make my father feel terrible. Its very unfair to me cause I work full time and go to school and she sits on her fat butt all day with no job and gets to call the shots? How in the world did that happen? this isn't even her family? I have work that Monday too so isn't it just as hard for me.... I sware I am not answering any of their phone calls for a few days cause I need to cool down, am I over reacting? Sorry for this rant, but I really needed to vent.


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## michzz

Start making separate plans with your father and living your life as yo see fit. I am positive that after awhile her tirades will grate on everyone. Stick to your plans, be reasonable about timing, alert all concerned including SIL if there are legit reasons for scheduling that interferes with her plans.

If there is conflicting plans? So be it.

Working around the wishes of irrational people sucks.

Crazy sets the agenda if you let it.


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## someguy888

Yes, try to get others in the family on your side and don't let her ruin things. Sounds like she has issues and is taking them out on you and your family. There has to be give and take in any family and it sounds like she is a taker. The family probably already knows this so will probably work with you in making alternate arrangements.


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## turnera

Just talk to your family, one by one, about how the things are adding up. Don't accuse her, don't try to destroy her, just point out that the whole family is starting to bend itself around to accommodating her, and if they don't put their feet down, it's going to be a long, miserable few decades ahead.


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## WantsHappiness

Mmm, I don’t know how much you can talk to the rest of the family about this. I would tread verrrrry lightly. This is your brother’s wife, like it or not this is who he chooses to be with. If he’s not coming to visit you it’s because he’s making the choice to do so. People only have so much influence over one another. 

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that she’s right and I do know what it’s like. I have a stbsister-in-law who also makes everything about her. Some people are just like that. But trying to get the family on your side likely won’t do much more than make you look like the one with problems. Maybe I’m way off base but if your family wants to bend to her wishes, that’s their problem. 

I agree with michzz who said to schedule things with your dad on your own. Be reasonable but if you can’t make it to the family get together and there is no way to compromise and meet in the middle (will she consider something like this? Meeting for dinner in a neutral place?) then take him out to dinner the following week. You do not have to be at this woman’s beck and call, do what works for you and spend time with your family when you can.


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