# DS Referral sources to provide



## Pit-of-my-stomach (Nov 2, 2010)

This may or may not already exist and I have seen the threads for a "DS that wants to get out of the fog" and a bunch of very useful topics here...

But... Let's say this forum specifically is someplace that I wouldn't want my DS to come nessasarily because I value the anonimity of being able to ask questions and be very honest without concern that someone I know or my DS would read these things...

So you have a DS, who _really_ doesn't know what is happening to them... knows nothing about the stages & psychology of affairs, has no one to really talk to (no one 100% unbias and objective) and really is _lost_. 

I have sent my DS to Marriagebuilders and there is lots of useful information there but its not as user friendly for someone that may not be very internet savvy (not familiar with forums), and its tougher to navigate through all of that information to find what your looking for. There is alot there, no doubt. I sincerly hope she will take full advantage of it... I just wonder if its a little overwelming.

But, I would like to point her to other places, articiles, etc... so she can educate herself of what is happening much like I have educated myself here...

Does anyone have very specific articles (maybe pointed toward a lost or wayward spouse) that they read that they found very usefull? Even if they were in MB or anywhere really..???


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## Eli-Zor (Nov 14, 2010)

> I have sent my DS to Marriagebuilders and there is lots of useful information there but its not as user friendly for someone that may not be very internet savvy (not familiar with forums), and its tougher to navigate through all of that information to find what your looking for.


She does not have to search if she registers as a user, she logs into the forum, writes the background down, she will be given advice and pointers to links that will take her to the required information. Your wife must be honest and explain she is the wayward spouse, like this forum she will be hand held though the recovery.

Surviving an Affair - Marriage Builders® Forums


Start by buying the "Surviving an Affair" book - Harley , many sites will reference you to this book.

A number of users on this forum offer advice that follows the processes recommended by Harley, so you and your wife would be aligned.


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## Affaircare (Jan 11, 2010)

You know, Pit, I'm not here to promote myself but I have to be honest--we have a couple really good articles on our Articles page.

I'd specifically suggest: 
Basic Concepts
What are Love Kindlers?
What are Love Extinguishers?
How do affairs start?
and
Coming out of an affair (which is written specifically to Disloyals who are trying to return to the marriage).

To help you rebuild, we also recommend our Quizzes . Each one helps you learn about yourself, learn about her, and the two of you can SHARE your results! 

We also have lots of extra, additional helpful stuff like our Facebook and Twitter (for daily reminders to "BE GOOD!"), a place for prayer requests, a newsletter...you know, helpful stuff!


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## disbelief (Oct 31, 2010)

I wish my spouse would read anything she wants to go it alone.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Pit-of-my-stomach (Nov 2, 2010)

Im sorry to hear your W wants to go it alone. At least she's honest and not just creating hope where there is none. honestly, Im not sure exactly what my W will actually read if anything. Like many events, conversations and "faked" efforts in the past... it could easily be her "buying more time" or saying what I want to hear or just getting more lip service to tell other people she has tried or is trying.

PS. Affaircare, would you check your Private Messages?


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