# Difficult choice to make



## Flo250188 (Mar 16, 2018)

Hi everyone 
I wanted to write this for a very long time, but I was always convinced that I am the monster in the relationship and shouldn’t even dare to ask for advice
My and my partner have been together for almost 5 years now. She is a great person and lovely to be around, I love her to bits.
She had trust issues since day 1 but rarely, and the happy moments simply made me forget that.
We now have a 6 months son and we reached a point where we simply hate each other. Everything I do is wrong, everything I don’t do is again wrong. We need the money to support ourselves and our child but me going to work seems to be huge problem.
I’ve seen a therapist who explained this this is common for couple of months after the delivery because of the hormones.
7 months later the same thing happens, and lately she has become often phisycally abusive , simply using any reason to attack me. 
I don’t want my son to grow up in such a toxic environment where we are at each other throats all day long, every day.
I have become depressed beyond imagination and often having suicidal thoughts.
I feel like I need to get out of this relationship but at the same time I can’t imagine leaving my son behind 
Anyone else in a similar situation that can share some thoughts?

Many thanks


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

If anyone physically assaults you,call the cops.
And I mean anyone.


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## Bananapeel (May 4, 2015)

Her assaulting you is her problem not your problem. Keep a video camera around to get proof then file for divorce (if you are married) and go after full custody of your child. Kids that grow up in a violent home are more likely to be violent themselves or victims of violence. That's not something you want your son to experience.

And using money as an excuse to stay in the relationship is not a good enough reason.


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## stro (Feb 7, 2018)

Physical abuse is never OK. You are obviously suffering because of it. It sounds like she is also emotionally abusive as well. Staying in that toxic environment isn’t going to make things any better. You say you don’t want to leave your child, so don’t. Fight for custody of him. But Get away from this woman.


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

Go and get legal advise and tell them that she is violent. You can't leave a baby with a violent parent. You need proof and a detailed log of what happened when.
I cant imagine what it must be like for a child to grow up with one parent violently abusing the other.


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## cc48kel (Apr 5, 2017)

I would hit the record button so you have proof. Some ppl have hidden cameras in their house-- you could get one as well. But yes, seek legal advice (it's free) to see what would be needed. You don't want your son to grow up in a hostile environment. Do what you can. Next time it gets physical, call the police- they will file a report.


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## Thor (Oct 31, 2011)

Please seek qualified therapy for your depression and suicidal thoughts! In the immediate time frame you can take a natural amino acid called 5-htp. This is available at your local grocery store or drug store. 50 mg mid afternoon and again mid evening. If you don't feel better within a couple of days you can double the dose, but not more than that. This is to get you through the weekend until you can make an appointment with a qualified therapist. It is a totally safe natural chemical which our bodies need. The worst side effect could be vivid dreams, in which case take the doses earlier in the day. Don't take 5-HTP if you are already on a prescription anti-depressant or anti-anxiety med.

Also supplement with Magnesium and Vitamin D. Strong doses of both.

Also, cut out any alcohol or caffeine. Eat healthy, and get good exercise of some sort. Even just long walks. Turn off the news or any other media which gets you upset at all.

Your family doc might prescribe medications, but you also need a qualified therapist to work with. I don't think we are the best venue to help you out here other than to support you emotionally. You are reacting normally to being treated abusively! A therapist can help you get a plan in place to get yourself on solid ground and to deal with all the issues.


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## chillymorn69 (Jun 27, 2016)

Next time she assaults you call the cops!

Having hormones is not an excuse to assault someone. Ever.


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