# When you don't want photos taken of you



## lucy999 (Sep 28, 2014)

Yes, I'm one of those. And not for the reason you think. Well, sort of.

I'm just not a fan of people taking pictures of me. Sure, it's got something to do with appearance, I want to look my best before I adorn someone's wedding picture wall for life. Or if they're posted on social media forever and ever. It's a HUGE turn off for me. I want to and think I should be able to have control over when and where my photo appears. But I realize in this day and age, that's really not possible.

My main concern is social media. I have zero desire to have my photo plastered on someone's FB, etc. And these days, we have no control over that. Say, at a party or something. I can't be all, HEY! DON'T TAKE PICTURES OF ME! I've tried it a few times at small social gatherings along w/my reasons why. And I felt and sounded like an idiot.

Some of my friends understand; some do not. 

For me, it's about not having control over those photos taken of say, candid moments, or when I'm not looking my best. I've admitted before I'm vain. I care how I look.

I've even declined a few social invitations because I knew it would be a photo fest and ultimately, those photos would end up on everyone's social media. 

Can I get an amen? Or will you tell me to just get the eff over it already and I'm a control freak? (Which is okay too).


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Amen! 

I feel you. In an era of selfies, I don't actually selfie a lot. I have the social media sites but I usually post pics of other things. I have a love-hate relationship with Facebook. It's annoying that people want to post every second of their lives to me. Also, I tend to be undercover at times so I don't want the world knowing all my BIZNAZZ



lucy999 said:


> I want to and think I should be able to have control over when and where my photo appears. But I realize in this day and age, that's really not possible.


It really isn't, unfortunately. We live ina time where everyone is posting up everything that happens all the time and people are always photographing themselves. 

While I have not declined an invite to an outing somewhere JUST because pics would be taken, I have at many times just said I don't want to be in the picture, or end up on social media, and have untagged myself from many things I've been posted in. I have a friend who I specifically told NOT to post a pic of me online (to be fair, it was me, her and another gal) and she said "Ok!" and did it anyway. I untagged myself and she was upset but ya know what, I don't care.

It's funny because my Facebook profile pic is almost never my full face. Looking back, I've had the profile of my face many times, the back of my head/hair with only my eyes seen looking at mirror, or of me taking a picture in a glass window of an art gallery with my camera phone covering my face. I like a little mystery. When my FB friends get a full-on pic of me (that I post and not a friend) in something it's a "special treat." Pretty funny.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

And doesn't it seem our friends always post the WORST pictures of us? LOL.


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## Anonymous07 (Aug 4, 2012)

Sorry, but I am going to be the one to tell you to get over it. 

I know at the time they're taken, there are a number of pictures I really don't like of myself, but I am ultimately very happy they have been taken when I look at them again months or years later. I hated most of the pictures from my baby shower, as I was tired/a hot mess, but looking back I'm glad they were taken. It's a lot more about the experience and the people there, then the details of how you looked. I may not look the best in all the pictures, but I would never avoid a place because I didn't want my picture taken. The picture issue should never interfere with your life. Don't miss out on a fun gathering because you just don't want to be in a picture.

My BIL takes a billion and a half pictures every time he comes to visit and they are not always the best pictures, but I enjoy seeing him and talking. He will post them to facebook, but I have to approve pictures before they are visible on my profile. It's never been a big deal to me. I also hate selfies, but that's something different.


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## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

I don't do FB but there are pics of me on other's FB....it does kind of bug me if they aren't flattering pictures...but I wouldn't ask them to take them down. I get what you are saying though.


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## Giro flee (Mar 12, 2013)

My husband just loves to take pictures when people aren't looking their best. Running around in the morning with bed head, all sweaty after a workout, etc. Rarely does he take a pic when we are dressed and having a good hair day. It starts to irritate me after a while. I don't want ninety percent of pictures to include me at my worst. For some reason he finds this funny.😡


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## Holland (Aug 20, 2012)

I have always hated having my photo taken, I am the most unphotogenic person that ever lived. 

Yeah AMEN


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## lucy999 (Sep 28, 2014)

Giro flee said:


> My husband just loves to take pictures when people aren't looking their best. Running around in the morning with bed head, all sweaty after a workout, etc. Rarely does he take a pic when we are dressed and having a good hair day. It starts to irritate me after a while. I don't want ninety percent of pictures to include me at my worst. For some reason he finds this funny.😡


Gah. Next time, wait til he's on the crapper and take a picture of him.


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## SecondTime'Round (Jan 15, 2015)

I don't like having my photo taken either because I'm not photogenic (in my opinion).

But, I think you bring up VERY valid points here, and it could probably even be a thesis topic! We have so little control of our own privacy these days, it is crazy!


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## lucy999 (Sep 28, 2014)

Anonymous07 said:


> It's a lot more about the experience and the people there, then the details of how you looked.


You are so right! Thank you for this. Because sometimes, (most times), it's not all about ME. It's about someone else. Photos capture the memories that were made at that point in time. That's the whole point of the picture. To remember.

I hear you. Loud and clear. I appreciate your honesty. You've given me something to chew on.


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## EnigmaGirl (Feb 7, 2015)

> Yes, I'm one of those. And not for the reason you think. Well, sort of.
> 
> I'm just not a fan of people taking pictures of me. Sure, it's got something to do with appearance, I want to look my best before I adorn someone's wedding picture wall for life. Or if they're posted on social media forever and ever. It's a HUGE turn off for me. I want to and think I should be able to have control over when and where my photo appears. But I realize in this day and age, that's really not possible.
> 
> ...


I totally understand this.

I HATE having my picture taken and I cannot stand social media.

I don't care what other people do...I just don't want to participate myself. I don't get exposing pictures and details of your life on social media. I enjoy my privacy and don't feel the need to posture or brag on facebook. The only person that needs to know I'm happy is me.

I've taken professional pictures of me with my husband and with my kids...but I don't like casual photos. Its not because I'm self-conscious about how I look, its because I can't control where the pictures end up when they're on someone's phone.

The worst incident I had was actually at my wedding. We had a very small, private ceremony. I invited no one but a few family members asked to come including my husband's daughter. I didn't care...thought it was a nice...but she's a nut with her phone camera...she takes soooo many pictures. So I had asked my then fiancé to tell her that if she came, there were no pictures at the ceremony. He did that (more than once) and yet when she came, I re-iterated it again and she started debating with me about it. I had to get pretty firm about it which was ridiculous since it was my wedding day. She literally insisted on taking pictures and I had to remind her that it was my wedding day and my only request was no pictures. It kind of ticked me off for a while since she got pretty adamant that she was doing it no matter what I said and I had to get irate.

I called her after and we discussed it and she honestly is just one of those people that thinks that you should have a picture of everything and she couldn't fathom that I didn't want any. She just honestly thought it super important.

I don't remember things by photo...in fact, photos always seem kind of like fake memories to me. The only thing I find them useful for is to remind myself of how my children looked at different ages. But for remembering events, I have a very graphic memory and I remember things by telling the story about the day it happened. I can remember every detail of important moments in my life. 

I've come to the conclusion that there are picture people...and there are non-picture people. Nothing wrong with either but I'm glad I'm in the non-picture club...lol.


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## lucy999 (Sep 28, 2014)

EnigmaGirl said:


> I've taken professional pictures of me with my husband and with my kids...but I don't like casual photos. Its not because I'm self-conscious about how I look, its because I can't control where the pictures end up when they're on someone's phone.
> 
> ^^^THIS.^^^
> 
> ...


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## tech-novelist (May 15, 2014)

lucy999 said:


> Yes, I'm one of those. And not for the reason you think. Well, sort of.
> 
> I'm just not a fan of people taking pictures of me. Sure, it's got something to do with appearance, I want to look my best before I adorn someone's wedding picture wall for life. Or if they're posted on social media forever and ever. It's a HUGE turn off for me. I want to and think I should be able to have control over when and where my photo appears. But I realize in this day and age, that's really not possible.
> 
> ...


Amen!


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

I like to take pictures of people's hands.


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## lucy999 (Sep 28, 2014)

Runs like Dog said:


> I like to take pictures of people's hands.


Interesting.Why?


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## kristin2349 (Sep 12, 2013)

Holland said:


> I have always hated having my photo taken, I am the most unphotogenic person that ever lived.
> 
> Yeah AMEN



I am with you Holland, seeing myself in most photos triggers facial dysmorphia or something in me. It freaks me out. Normally I do what Amish kids are taught to do when they see "English" try to photograph them and hold my middle finger up over my face! My manicures are always flawless.

A few years ago I went on a once in a lifetime trip to Kenya. My friend who is a professional photographer came on the trip, and always respectfully photographs me and lets me delete any I think are horrible. He has taken some great photos of me, some of the only photos that exist of me without my middle finger over my face. We should all have friends like that, sadly I have some doozies on FB even though I avoid that like an Amish person too.


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

Question falls in the category of 'what if I don't want to poop?'
It's going to happen. Trying to control it is going to make it much, much worse and pretty much take over your life. Then there will be photos of you worrying about being photographed. 

Going to social events is like going to the grocery store. You should go to social events to be social, not to worry about being photographed (which will happen, and you can't spend all of your conscious time monitoring it or thinking about it). At the grocery store, you don't really spend time thinking about how the food is going to become poop, or worrying about how to prevent this from happening. Some things in life need to be banned from consciousness, like thinking how being in a car under human control with other human beings on the road in cars and trucks is like death breathing down your neck. You have to focus on the driving, not on the death. The groceries, not on the poop. The socializing, not on what asocial or overly social or socially needy people are doing. 

There is no privacy in life. I would be more concerned about putting private thoughts out on the internet than in having an image of your external self being captured in perpetuity. One is much more invasive than the other.


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

lucy999 said:


> I can't be all, HEY! DON'T TAKE PICTURES OF ME! I've tried it a few times at small social gatherings along w/my reasons why. And I felt and sounded like an idiot.
> 
> Some of my friends understand; some do not.


I hear you, to an extent. 

I'm no longer on FB. My annoyance with social media as far as photos goes, is that it feels more about the need to take the photo, judge it, and then 'share' instead of being in the actual moment. I've done that myself. The close friends I'm surrounded with, don't tend to be the types to take photos and post. We do sometimes take a photo and share via text later. That's for the memory and primarily just for, and between, us. 

I've had two scenarios just recently whereby someone wanted to take my photo. I declined, softly at first. She persisted quite strongly. My heels started to dig in. I was her customer. She told me to 'get over it' and I told her she was pushing my buttons and I didn't want my photo taken. haha... so yes, I feel you. Did she end up getting the photo? Yes. Did I feel respected as her customer? No.

A week later, I was in a similar position somewhere else. I said, 'I'll opt out of this one.' The response was a graceful 'No problem' and that was that.

As for social events though, if you want to go, then go! Please don't let such things prevent you from seeing friends, meeting new people and enjoying yourself!


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

I'm not photogenic either, so I always make faces.


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## Brigit (Apr 28, 2015)

heartsbeating said:


> I hear you, to an extent.
> 
> I'm no longer on FB. My annoyance with social media as far as photos goes, is that it feels more about the need to take the photo, judge it, and then 'share' instead of being in the actual moment. I've done that myself. The close friends I'm surrounded with, don't tend to be the types to take photos and post. We do sometimes take a photo and share via text later. That's for the memory and primarily just for, and between, us.
> 
> ...


Facebook is evil.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

Ok.. I am going against the grain here.. but try to not beat me up too fast...because I AM SENSITIVE to how others feel on this..

One of my hobbies is "*People Photography*".. I've always enjoyed giving Photo's away.. it's about "the Memories".. and good times people share.. many a parent has thanked me for taking photos & sharing them over the years....some have told me without mine, they would have very few...and it always makes me feel good when I see something I have taken made a profile pic or used as a Cover photo... it happens often... 
I am the MOM -always with the SLR in hand ..  

However...I have a close friend who feels as you do Lucy999 & others on this thread... very private woman....HATES her picture taken (well she is OK with that -just not putting it anywhere online)... *and I've always respected THAT*.. 

It's actually something *we SHOULD ASK* ....and I DO.. because I know not everyone feels the same... I am mindful of this fact... 

Unless I see a FB person is VERY OPEN to pictures / sharing (you can always tell )... I will NOT put a pic on their Page or share it.. I will send it in a private message instead (and that's only if the picture is VERY good, feeling they would want it)... if if sucks.. I delete them...as I am very particular myself. 

Even with those who ARE "Picture people" & enjoy the sharing... I am always careful that the picture is "flattering" to them.. as I know how I would feel if I looked lousy/ bad hair day... I'd want that deleted like yesterday ! ...I can be "vain" like that myself .


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

RandomDude said:


> I'm not photogenic either,* so I always make faces*.


...and those are the best ones to Catch [email protected]#.. if you have a good attitude about it .. of course!


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

EnigmaGirl said:


> The worst incident I had was actually at my wedding. We had a very small, private ceremony. I invited no one but a few family members asked to come including my husband's daughter. I didn't care...thought it was a nice...but she's a nut with her phone camera...she takes soooo many pictures. *So I had asked my then fiancé to tell her that if she came, there were no pictures at the ceremony. He did that (more than once) and yet when she came, I re-iterated it again and she started debating with me about it. I had to get pretty firm about it which was ridiculous since it was my wedding day*.
> 
> *She literally insisted on taking pictures and I had to remind her that it was my wedding day and my only request was no pictures. It kind of ticked me off for a while since she got pretty adamant that she was doing it no matter what I said and I had to get irate.*
> 
> I called her after and we discussed it and she honestly is just one of those people that thinks that you should have a picture of everything and she couldn't fathom that I didn't want any. She just honestly thought it super important.


 She SHOULD have respected your wishes in every way... I can understand WHERE this woman was coming from, feeling it was the most SPECIAL of days..that you may want to look back upon it.. but still.. it was YOUR DAY.. I think *offering *is the most we should do.. but NEVER pushing.. 

I cared so much about capturing the Memories for our BIG DAY ...I had 2 Photographers!.. one was a good friend (she offered -her present to us)... plus we paid a Professional.. of all the things we have to look back upon ...the photos bring the day most to LIFE ...ushering us back there & some of the video that was taken.. 

Last year, 3rd son having learned how to navigate Sony Vegas software from a friend helped us make a Wedding Video for our 25th anniversary...video clips combined with the photos, adding the song we danced too..& others we hold dear...15 minutes long.. I can't begin to express how much *that* meant to me.. I treasure it .... That's our foundation.. where it all began. ...it's something we can share with our children & grandchildren someday.... . that's just HOW some of us are wired.. and HOW MUCH IT means.. we are very sentimental about it.. 

But again... 

It was YOUR DAY... YOUR LIFE....YOUR CHOICE ( I assume your husband was on board too) to pass up on those.. and this person should have put her phone down. 



> *I've come to the conclusion that there are picture people...and there are non-picture people. Nothing wrong with either but I'm glad I'm in the non-picture club...lol*.


 Yes.. this is very true...

IF our house burned to the ground tomorrow... all turning to ashes....I would cry a river over the loss of treasured photos, the albums, the family portraits that hung on the walls.. (though I have all saved on CD's, old pictures scanned -through all our years) and on hard drives - one not kept in the house - just in case.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

SimplyAmorous said:


> ...and those are the best ones to Catch [email protected]#.. if you have a good attitude about it .. of course!


Well, sometimes people do complain though - they go:

"OMFG look at your face! You ruined the photo! WTF kind of face were you trying to pull?! OMG everyone was normal and you stick out like a sore thumb in the photo" etc etc

Personally I find such reactions amusing however


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Lol well you're cool about it, alot of people arent! They want to exhibit their photos or something, meh! I hate my photo flying around, always have. Sometimes they try to catch me off guard and I ninja out of the way! As if I'm dodging a bullet! You see only a blur! BLUR OF SPEED!


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

RandomDude said:


> Lol well you're cool about it, alot of people arent! They want to exhibit their photos or something, meh! I hate my photo flying around, always have. Sometimes they try to catch me off guard and I ninja out of the way! As if I'm dodging a bullet! You see only a blur! BLUR OF SPEED!


I wouldn't want to be a bother to anyone..and I'd prefer people speak up if they dislike something & don't want it.. (like being in a picture, etc).... it just makes it easier *to know* where people's boundaries are..

Those I hang with are all pretty easy going.. I have never been met with irritation or discord over my picture taking.. I have an aunt who always had to snap photos every family gathering.. her husband hated it... she'd try to position everyone JUST SO.. the complaining starts....how slow she is.. hurry up.... she wasn't helping matters not knowing how to use the camera half the time.. witnessing THIS, growing up... put a sour taste in my mouth....

Just better to go where you are appreciated ...at the very least.. KNOW your camera so a few pictures isn't a fiasco!

My husband told me when he was a kid... him & a friend went Halloweening as a* 2 headed Robot*.. his mom took NO pictures of this.. nada ..you know what I think.. Da** it [email protected]#$% .. how ORIGINAL THAT WAS !. 

Not the issue of this thread of course.. I hope we still take some pics of our kids/ their friends -for memories sake... even if we don't care about ourselves.. 

This was my 1st introduction into Picture taking .....My Grandmother & Pa owned a Trailer Court.. as a young girl.. I remember the WALL FILLED WITH PICTURES of families standing next to their trailer...... She had a big window over looking all of them.. and all these family photos on the right side of the wall to whom lived where..from the top of the wall to the bottom.... I guess at a young age -I thought that was pretty organized & pretty cool.. if you wanted to live there, you would be subject to my Grandmother adding your family to her kitchen wall ... ha ha.....










She also had Photo albums full ...all in order of the years... I always enjoyed looking through those.. I guess I've just taken after my Gram on this one... but Oh so thankful for the ease of DIGITAL !


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

In all her photos it would just be me pulling unrecognisable faces and other general acts of immaturity 

It's good you respect boundaries, alot of people don't, including ex-wife, she sometimes snapped me in rather private situations and had me chase her around fighting for her phone. It wasn't too bad though cause I normally got her back for it.


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## Anonymous07 (Aug 4, 2012)

lucy999 said:


> You are so right! Thank you for this. Because sometimes, (most times), it's not all about ME. It's about someone else. Photos capture the memories that were made at that point in time. That's the whole point of the picture. To remember.
> 
> I hear you. Loud and clear. I appreciate your honesty. You've given me something to chew on.


Photos are there to capture a moment in time. I can't imagine not having photos of my wedding, baby shower, the birth of my son, a friend's birthday party, and so on. It's not really about me, but the event. Those photos are the fastest way to bring those memories to life and have a good laugh/cry/etc.

I honestly do not care what others think of how I look, so being in any picture does not bother me. I know my value is a lot more than just my physical appearance and I put a lot more value on experiences. I love spending time with family and friends, and would never let pictures ruin that. I'm not going to waste my time worrying what I look like, when I can be having fun instead. It's like the women at the beach who are so worried about their appearance, that all they do is just sit in their beach chairs. I refuse to do that, as I want to be out by the water playing with my son and enjoying my time.


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## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

Holland said:


> I have always hated having my photo taken, I am the most unphotogenic person that ever lived.
> 
> Yeah AMEN


Ooooooooohhhhh. I disagree. I am lol. In my whole life maybe a dozen pictures do I think I actually look good. I avoid the camera like the plague.


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## thread the needle (May 4, 2015)

People that take or post pictures of other people without their permission are insensitive and oblivious to this common issue.

I won't do it but understand stupidity and insensitivity is part of life and being photographed in a less than flattering manner is an annoying but predictable practical jokey blood sport that so many idiots think is funny. 

I hate those people and don't spend time with them or leave the scene when the camera is out if I absolutely was required to be around morons for some reason..

Mean stupid people do that


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## EnigmaGirl (Feb 7, 2015)

> She SHOULD have respected your wishes in every way... I can understand WHERE this woman was coming from, feeling it was the most SPECIAL of days..that you may want to look back upon it.. but still.. it was YOUR DAY.. I think offering is the most we should do.. but NEVER pushing..


I agree. I talked to her afterwards and she told me that she thought this was super important, etc. She's in her 20s too...and an A-type personality that thinks her way is always the right way.

What bugged me is that first, I did compromise...I wanted a private ceremony...just the two of us....however, a few of his family members wanted to come. In the end, I realized it was really nice that they wanted to come and I'm glad that they did because I think it was important to my husband. Secondly, I had him tell her weeks before that there was no pictures. I didn't surprise her with it. It shouldn't have even been a discussion point and that I had to get irate before a ceremony that she wasn't even really invited to was kind of ridiculous. Its my wedding and I certainly would never tell anyone else what to do at their ceremony.

In the end, I love her. She's a sweet, lovely, kind woman who's a wonderful person....so this is no big deal. We just have very different ideas about our personal privacy. 



> Not the issue of this thread of course.. I hope we still take some pics of our kids/ their friends -for memories sake... even if we don't care about ourselves..


My issues about pictures apply to me....like any mom, I took pictures/videos of my kids through developmental stages.

I do respect my kid's wishes on some of the pictures took though. If they don't like them, I don't destroy the original but I also don't put them in any photo albums or show them to people to embarrass them and I certainly would never post pictures of my kids on social media. I don't use it anyway but I seriously don't understand people who stick pictures of small kids all over FB with details of their family life for every pedophile in a 50 mile radius to see.

Now they're old enough to take their own pictures...so thankfully, I don't really have to use a camera anymore.


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## EnigmaGirl (Feb 7, 2015)

> Those photos are the fastest way to bring those memories to life and have a good laugh/cry/etc.


We actually never remember anything in our family life using photos.

We remember by telling the stories. When my kids and I have dinners, we tell stories of events that have happened. A lot of them are now stories that have become legendary in family lore. I'm the lead storyteller for the family because any event in my life, I can remember with photographic detail without a pictures. In addition, I can remember what someone said, how they said it, what happened before and after. We spend hours talking about what happened at whatever event from each person's perspective. Its actually pretty fun and it fleshes out the event and fixes it in your memory far better than a two-dimensional photo can.

The only thing I use photos or videos for is when I need the for projects or some event. I actually rarely pull them out. They are nice to remember the specific way my kid's looked as they were growing though.

Everyone is different.


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## NotEasy (Apr 19, 2015)

Holland said:


> I have always hated having my photo taken, I am the most unphotogenic person that ever lived.


No, I am the most unphotogenic person ever. I almost feel like asking for photographic proof.

I don't mind having my photo taken. At work we doctored our team's photos on the staff directory. Mine was done as a police mug shot. They said mine was the simplest to edit. I feel if I can get through life with a mug like this, I must have something else going for me. And those who look like Barbie or Ken are often also as hollow as a plastic doll.


If you don't want to be photographed then that should be obeyed. Here in Aus we have laws to that effect. A famous professional photographer here was almost arrested trying to do a modern take on a very famous Aussie photograph called "Sunbaker". Trouble is he had a big lens, as he was a professional photographer. And there were children on the beach, as on every beach. Parents complained to police and he was detained. The fact that he had permission to photograph the person that he was photographing was not sufficient, once a complaint had been made. Finally he gave up on beach photography. Society is mad.

Apart from laws, decency should say you don't take photos of people who don't want to be photographed. Especially a bride or a customer. I thought best men and brides maids were there to take care of such problems so the bride and groom can stress out a little less.


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## Anonymous07 (Aug 4, 2012)

EnigmaGirl said:


> We actually never remember anything in our family life using photos.
> 
> We remember by telling the stories. When my kids and I have dinners, we tell stories of events that have happened. A lot of them are now stories that have become legendary in family lore. I'm the lead storyteller for the family because any event in my life, I can remember with photographic detail without a pictures. In addition, I can remember what someone said, how they said it, what happened before and after. We spend hours talking about what happened at whatever event from each person's perspective. Its actually pretty fun and it fleshes out the event and fixes it in your memory far better than a two-dimensional photo can.
> 
> ...


I said photos are the fastest way to bring back memories, not the only way to do so. Obviously story telling can bring back memories, but it takes longer and those memories can be easily distorted, as that is just how the human brain works. It's much easier to look at a picture and really see how it was. 

I highly enjoy looking at pictures of fun events. My wedding photos, husband's birthday party, a day at the beach with family and friends, and so on. I also make sure to be in pictures with my son, so I'm not just the mom behind the camera. I really value the photos I have with my parents and also want my son to be able to look back at pictures with me as well. I have a great memory, but you will inevitably forget a number of the fun day to day events that pictures can capture.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

Anonymous07 said:


> I said photos are the fastest way to bring back memories, not the only way to do so. Obviously story telling can bring back memories, but it takes longer and those memories can be easily distorted, as that is just how the human brain works. It's much easier to look at a picture and really see how it was.
> 
> I highly enjoy looking at pictures of fun events. My wedding photos, husband's birthday party, a day at the beach with family and friends, and so on. I also make sure to be in pictures with my son, so I'm not just the mom behind the camera. I really value the photos I have with my parents and also want my son to be able to look back at pictures with me as well. I have a great memory, but you will inevitably forget a number of the fun day to day events that pictures can capture.


This is over thinking... but I worry someday ...what if I loose the memories, or him...... WHAT IF.. in the "Notebook".. so sad really... Noah wouldn't give up.. through the pages of her written stories...their life together...he did his best to bring her back.... just for short moments in time... 

I try to leave both... but I sure hope I/we won't ever be in that situation... I even find today, there are things my H remembers that I have no recollection of...I hope that is not a bad sign!... with the pictures, it is right there in front of me. 

These, an old song... a funny story...all 3 .. I would be sad to take any of them away.


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## Anonymous07 (Aug 4, 2012)

SimplyAmorous said:


> This is over thinking... but I worry someday ...what if I loose the memories, or him...... WHAT IF.. in the "Notebook".. so sad really... Noah wouldn't give up.. through the pages of her written stories...their life together...he did his best to bring her back.... just for short moments in time...
> 
> I try to leave both... but I sure hope I/we won't ever be in that situation... I even find today, there are things my H remembers that I have no recollection of...I hope that is not a bad sign!... with the pictures, it is right there in front of me.


My grandpa passed away from complications of Alzheimer's disease a year and a half ago, so it runs in my family. The pictures did help bring back some memory for him in the more early stages of the disease, but at the end he was unrecognizable and had the cognitive ability of a 2 year old. It was very difficult to watch that fun loving, adventurous man deteriorate becoming afraid of water, not remembering anything, etc. 

Although memory loss is just part of aging in general, as we all will forget many details in life. Even the smartest people will forget things. That is just life. It's a great reason to have photos and home videos that can bring back those memories to life. I have a lot of pictures of my life and home videos of myself that my parents took and of my son that we took. I swear it's the reason people keep having kids, as they forget how tough labor/delivery and newborns are. :rofl: I know I've forgotten many of the bad parts and my son is not even 2 yet. My mother has definitely forgotten the tough parts, but sure remembered again when she helped take care of my son the other day.


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## Kristisha (Apr 29, 2013)

lucy999 said:


> Yes, I'm one of those. And not for the reason you think. Well, sort of.
> 
> I'm just not a fan of people taking pictures of me. Sure, it's got something to do with appearance, I want to look my best before I adorn someone's wedding picture wall for life. Or if they're posted on social media forever and ever. It's a HUGE turn off for me. I want to and think I should be able to have control over when and where my photo appears. But I realize in this day and age, that's really not possible.
> 
> ...



OMG!! I thought I was the only one. I don't have any account on the social media because no matter how much privacy they offer, I still feel exposed!!!

I had a talk with my friends and family about this and like you lucy999 some got it some didn't and that bothers me A LOT!!

I mean there is a reason behind my decision and I have a privacy concern, so I don't want anybody else to do it without my consent.

And I hate when they get comments about me

So I hear you sister!:iagree::iagree:


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## NotEasy (Apr 19, 2015)

Anonymous07 said:


> I have a lot of pictures of my life and home videos of myself that my parents took and of my son that we took. I swear it's the reason people keep having kids, as they forget how tough labor/delivery and newborns are. :rofl:


:iagree:It is not 'they' forget, it is 'mothers' forget. I still remember our daughters delivery but my wife thinks it was easy. I have given up correcting her. 
My father says, if males had the children humans would have died out after Adam's first child.


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

She gives me Hell for it all the time, but I love taking pictures of my wife when she's eating. I'd share some of them here, but she'd kill me.


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## jld (Dec 1, 2013)

NotEasy said:


> :iagree:It is not 'they' forget, it is 'mothers' forget. I still remember our daughters delivery but my wife thinks it was easy. I have given up correcting her.
> My father says, if males had the children humans would have died out after Adam's first child.


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