# Need advice asap



## isabella88 (Dec 28, 2015)

I am going to be 28 on Sunday. I am married to a man who is an undocumented person in the united States. We have been married 7 years. We has 2 children together and I have one from a previous relationship. We live in a home that is mine (will be inherited when my father passes). 

First off.... I am not perfect. I have had a relationship while married but we were separated. I had a child when we got married but he knew about her. 

I have told my husband multiple times I do not love him. I don't want to be with or around him. Looking at him disgusts me. I married him out of spite toward his mother. We have been "together" a total of about 3 out of the 4 years we have been married. We fight continuously. I try not to fight in front of my kids but he does it on purpose I believe.

Anyways, he gets me in situations (makes me lose my vehicle/has me stop working etc) then leaves. I don't believe he loves our kids. He leaves and takes their stuff. Leaves them with nothing and absolutely does nothing to help with them unless I'm with him. For money for them i have to have intercourse with him. He has a child he had with a woman he had an affair with while I was pregnant with our first child (we were together). 

He is now refusing to leave. He recently wrecked on new years eve and lost his car. He has been verbally abusive our entire marriage. I refused to help him get a vehicle in my name for him to drive (he has no license cuz he is illegal). My oldest child is mixed with black (he is not mean to her) but to hurt me when he's drinking or mad he calls me a n*gger lover and if I don't answer right away on the phone he tells me I must be with my n*gger. I don't have sex with him but once a month or so. I hate it. I don't enjoy it. It makes me miserable. I don't believe in hate towards ppl for no reason but I do sincerely hate him. He picks and picks. I will ask him to leave me alone and he will come up with something to fight. If I'm in a happy mood he fights to make me mad then says there's something wrong with me. 

I got put on medication to try to deal with him. I shouldn't have to do that. So now I tell him to leave I don't want him here. He won't go. I live in Florida... What are my options?


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## tech-novelist (May 15, 2014)

Get rid of him.

If you have to call immigration on him to get him to leave, do that.

(Note: I have no issue with immigration, but this guy is a scumbag and needs to go away. Far away.)


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## TeddieG (Sep 9, 2015)

What tech said. Maybe see a lawyer for a free consultation and get divorce started asap. But if you've been reading here for long, you'll see that many long-term posters advise DOING something but not telling your cheating or wandering or abusive spouse what you're going to do. Just do it.


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