# Future spouse grateful for affair



## Augusto (Aug 14, 2013)

Met a lady in church today that said she is eternally grateful that her husbands ex ran off with another man. They were married for 7 years and after the 5th child was born she up and left. She had been talking to an ex boyfriend for months and he made her feel special and forgot what being a wife and mother was about. They divorced and she did not want the kids so it was an easy split. The deal was her husband got everything in the deal if he granted a clean and fast divorce. Fast forward 4 years and they have a wonderful family. She is grateful everyday that his ex wife cheated on him. She not only helped heal him but also gave her a real chance in raising children since she is not able to have any which helped cause her divorce from her first husband as he fathered 3 with two different women behind her back. She mentioned that the ex of her husband actually knocked on the door one day and her husband let her in and she started off by saying she made a huge mistake and asked if there was a chance for her to come home and make things right. Then from the kitchen comes herself and he introduces her to his ex wife and the ex leaves without saying a word, goes to her car and sobs for over 2 hours. Turns out the guy she left her family for had 3 other girlfriends while they were living together. She had bounced from relationship to relationship and eventually ended up back home living with her parents during much of the last 4 years. After no contact for 4 years she comes back thinking she can just continue where she left off. Now she is claiming this lady has stolen her family from her. Yet she does not know how much pain her husband and children went through. He is wonderful father and loving husband from what she said. You just do not throw your family away like garbage and expect different results. There are a lot of things I would like to say to this women....like "How would you like to be one of those children in that their mom chose to be with a boyfriend instead of being there when you needed them the most while growing up?":scratchhead:


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## user_zero (Aug 30, 2013)

Augusto said:


> Met a lady in church today that said she is eternally grateful that her husbands ex ran off with another man. They were married for 7 years and after the 5th child was born she up and left. She had been talking to an ex boyfriend for months and he made her feel special and forgot what being a wife and mother was about. They divorced and she did not want the kids so it was an easy split. The deal was her husband got everything in the deal if he granted a clean and fast divorce. Fast forward 4 years and they have a wonderful family. She is grateful everyday that his ex wife cheated on him. She not only helped heal him but also gave her a real chance in raising children since she is not able to have any which helped cause her divorce from her first husband as he fathered 3 with two different women behind her back. She mentioned that the ex of her husband actually knocked on the door one day and her husband let her in and she started off by saying she made a huge mistake and asked if there was a chance for her to come home and make things right. Then from the kitchen comes herself and he introduces her to his ex wife and the ex leaves without saying a word, goes to her car and sobs for over 2 hours. Turns out the guy she left her family for had 3 other girlfriends while they were living together. She had bounced from relationship to relationship and eventually ended up back home living with her parents during much of the last 4 years. *After no contact for 4 years she comes back thinking she can just continue where she left off. Now she is claiming this lady has stolen her family from her.* Yet she does not know how much pain her husband and children went through. He is wonderful father and loving husband from what she said. You just do not throw your family away like garbage and expect different results. There are a lot of things I would like to say to this women....like "How would you like to be one of those children in that their mom chose to be with a boyfriend instead of being there when you needed them the most while growing up?":scratchhead:


taking no responsibility for one's actions and blaming others for one's choices. hummmm..... immaturity is the mark of cheaters (the ones who has no remorse)


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## workindad (May 7, 2011)

What a mess. I feel for the affected family. Glad the husband and kids found a way to start over and rebuild in what sounds like a healthy manner. 

Hopefully the exw will find a way to get her life back on track. 

Another example of getting a good divorce deal for the betrayed by acting decisively and quickly.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## phillybeffandswiss (Jan 20, 2013)

Did she expect him to sit around, in a 4 year limbo, while she "found what she was missing." Terrible situation, but good for him.


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## Acoa (Sep 21, 2012)

Yeah, grass wasn't greener now she has buyer's remorse. Boo hoo.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Augusto said:


> Met a lady in church today that said she is eternally grateful that her husbands ex ran off with another man.
> 
> …..
> 
> There are a lot of things I would like to say to this women....like "How would you like to be one of those children in that their mom chose to be with a boyfriend instead of being there when you needed them the most while growing up?":scratchhead:


I think that people have missed your point. Your point is that you are taken back by the new wife and that she’s glad that her husband’s ex had an affair and abandoned the husband and her children.

I agree with you that it’s pretty sad for the lady at church to express/view the breakup of a family in that light. But at the same time, did nothing wrong and has provided stability for the children and has a good life with her now husband. And she is grateful for that. Not a bad thing to be grateful for.


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## thatbpguy (Dec 24, 2012)

My ex walked away from our daughter without a thought. After all these years (15) they live less than a mile apart and see each other a few times per year and without much love. In her own way she has tried to get back into my daughter's good graces, but apologizing isn't part of her efforts.

I suppose the vast majority of betrayers do so with selfishness as one of the prime motivators.


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## manticore (Sep 3, 2013)

EleGirl said:


> I agree with you that it’s pretty sad for the lady at church to express/view the breakup of a family in that light. But at the same time, did nothing wrong and has provided stability for the children and has a good life with her now husband. And she is grateful for that. Not a bad thing to be grateful for.


Well I really don't see it as a bad thing, it may sound crude and rude from certain perspective, but depending on perspectives almost always for someone to do good in life means that someone had the unfortunate side affect:

- to have a promotion someone else has to lose it
- to have a succesful business somenone else business is no making money
- to win the lottery many other have to buy tickets and lose.
- to have an organ transplant someone has to die.

The woman is happy because was blessed now with a loyal husband and a family including toddlers that she cant have as she is infertile, but for her to have them someone has to lose them, she didn't stole anything she took what someone else left as unimportant giving it for granted and did not apprecited them, while for she who was previously cheated and unable to have family on her own considered them valuable and hard to acchive.

normally humans have many opportunities in their life to acchive happiness sometimes they come earlier in life and sometimes come later but is important to recognize when is yours and take it.


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## phillybeffandswiss (Jan 20, 2013)

EleGirl said:


> I think that people have missed your point.


No, I understood it, I just don't see it as sad or the way he read into it. Most religions I have attended, researched or were part of taught people to speak exactly like she did.

Basically, she said "this is how horrible our lives were, until God put us together, now look at us. Praise God/Jesus."



> Yet she does not know how much pain her husband and children went through. He is wonderful father and loving husband from what she said. You just do not throw your family away like garbage and expect different results. There are a lot of things I would like to say to this women....like "How would you like to be one of those children in that their mom chose to be with a boyfriend instead of being there when you needed them the most while growing up?"


This is the assumption I ignored. If you were at a social gathering, I might get your confusion. You were in church, why would she give you the gory unhappy details unless you are a Priest?


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## LongWalk (Apr 4, 2013)

How does a mother walk away from her own children? Some wires were not connected upstairs.


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## PreRaphaelite (Dec 15, 2012)

I cannot take much satisfaction in a story like this, assuming that it's true. You can say that the Ex-wife deserves what she got, and it's true, but I take no pleasure in seeing someone like her destroy her life that way to the point where she now has nothing. It's sad.


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## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

PreRaphaelite said:


> I cannot take much satisfaction in a story like this, assuming that it's true. You can say that the Ex-wife deserves what she got, and it's true, but I take no pleasure in seeing someone like her destroy her life that way to the point where she now has nothing. It's sad.


I think there is a difference between taking joy in someone's misery in order to feel better about yourself vs feeling satisfaction in knowing that someone suffers the consequences of his/her actions. It's inspirational to see someone who chooses partying over their own family ultimately suffering for those terrible decisions, because it reinforces the notion that it's good to make the right decisions in life.


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