# penis size of my wifes x is ruining our sex and cuddles



## TAMissues (Aug 14, 2015)

I suspect I will get beat up by women and men over this one and I know it is stupid but I have gone a few years not enjoying sex with my wife. I just joined because I don't know what to do.

We have been married 6 years. The first 3 everything was wonderful.
One night after my wife had been drinking and we had just had sex and somehow we got on the subject of penis size. Mine is above average in size and have never cared much about this thing. I knew she had 8-10 boyfriends before we got married and me about the same amount of girlfriends. I always knew statistically one of her past guys must have had a bigger penis than me and didn't think or care about it.

Anyway she got onto this "funny" story her girlfriends liked about how huge one of her boyfriends had been to the point of them having a hard time getting it in to begin having sex. Her and her girlfriends apparently thought it was funny and still do. She dated the guy for 3 years and almost married him. I know who he is but don't know him well.

I know it is so weak and pathetic but I can't get the though of this guy and her having sex out of my mind. We have talked about and every time it makes things worse. She has said how it wasn't fun, uncomfortable etc. That our sex is the best of her life.

I would appreciate a sincere comment on this. I'm to the point of needing a shrink about it.


----------



## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*Either you're over-envious about her BF's penile size or are insecure in your own sexual capabilities!

Move on! A physically and psychologically healthy male would never allow himself to be bothered by this in the very least!*
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

I think seeing someone about this may be the way to go. There's pretty much no benefit to having the kind of information you now have, but there's also pretty much nothing your wife can say at this point that will help in any way. Find a therapist to work this out with, before it causes irreparable harm to your marriage. 

And stop having these types of conversations with your wife. You don't want or need details of any type regarding her previous sexual exploits, so don't ever ask for them. Make sure she knows you don't want details, as well, so she doesn't feel the need to overshare again in future.


----------



## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

I suggest you go ahead and see the shrink. She loves you and wants to be with you. Don't ruin that because you think you can't possibly please her with your average tool. When you make love to her bring the passion and the bring the heat. If she was disappointed with your package, I doubt she would have married you, unless you're filthy rich.


----------



## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

Bigger isn't necessarily better, and is sometimes worse. I don't really understand what is bothering you about this. She loves you, chose you, and says you're the best, and there is no reason to think she is lying. The problem is really only in your own mind, and if you can't let it go, get some counseling.


----------



## jorgegene (May 26, 2012)

believe her when she says it wasn't comfortable having that gigantic thing in her.

i'm no expert on these matters, but I've run into women that have said in confidence that oversize units are often NOT fun!

average is 'average' for a reason. think about it. it is designed to give pleasure and accomplish the task at hand.
'average' does it millions of times x millions of times over thousands of years.
if they were meant to be bigger................they would be bigger.


----------



## brooklynAnn (Jun 29, 2015)

if your wife said that sex with you is the best. Then, believe her. If not and you keep bring this up, she is going to get pissed. 

You are also going to become insecure and unhappy. Your woman is not going to want you when you become like this. 

If she said it was painful, then, I am sure it was. 

Then, think about this, that huge pole poking in there, it can only go so far. Getting hit on your cervix is painful, leads to UTIs and all kind of internal pains. Little tiny tears around your vj. All of that is so wonderful. And your poor wife is missing out on it.

Hear is a new image. You in your wife, filling her up. Sounds like a winning image. Now go bang that woman and make her happy. Stop thinking stupid thoughts.


----------



## TAMissues (Aug 14, 2015)

I do please her with my ****. Make her orgasm with my mouth all the time and also during sex. She loves it and loves me. I love her. She is the love of my life.
I just wish to God she had never shared that story. It's a festering wound on my brain. There are so many nights when I am horny and just cant do it because of the thought of that dude giving it to her.
blaaaa. I guess a shrink might help. I's to the point where I want to leave her.


----------



## TAMissues (Aug 14, 2015)

I do hit her cervix myself. I think I feel a huge deformation in it from her x which is another one of my insane thoughts.


----------



## SecondTime'Round (Jan 15, 2015)

I understand. 

If my man told me about a body part of a former lover he was with, I would feel the same way you do. Why? Because I'm insecure about my own body. And yes, I'm in therapy for that.


----------



## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

TAMissues said:


> I do please her with my ****. Make her orgasm with my mouth all the time and also during sex. She loves it and loves me. I love her. She is the love of my life.
> I just wish to God she had never shared that story. It's a festering wound on my brain. There are so many nights when I am horny and just cant do it because of the thought of that dude giving it to her.
> blaaaa. I guess a shrink might help. I's to the point where I want to leave her.


*Get yourself into IC as soon as possible and don't let this phobia attempt to ruin what seems to be a loving relationship! Best of luck to you!*
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## TAMissues (Aug 14, 2015)

alright...I'm wrong about the deformation. It does feel like a left turn when I hit it.

Learned this on Google just now.

"feels much like a cul-de-sac on a dead-end street, a curved pocket you can feel deep inside the vagina, tucked under the cervix. Technically speaking, it's an erogenous zone in the Anterior Fornix, the area in the back of the vagina into which the cervix protrudes."


----------



## McDean (Jun 13, 2015)

TAMissues said:


> I do please her with my ****. Make her orgasm with my mouth all the time and also during sex. She loves it and loves me. I love her. She is the love of my life.
> I just wish to God she had never shared that story. It's a festering wound on my brain. There are so many nights when I am horny and just cant do it because of the thought of that dude giving it to her.
> blaaaa. I guess a shrink might help. I's to the point where I want to leave her.


Trust the others on here when they say to let it go and don't engage in this talk anymore....as men it is always hard to ignore that our current loves had past lovers who may have been this, that or the other. It can affect women too....I know I'm not the biggest my wife has ever had but I know I'm the only one to ever give her multiples, be happy in what makes her happy!


----------



## TAMissues (Aug 14, 2015)

Not trying to turn this into a biology seminar. That story she told me has made me bawl my eyes out for countless hours.
More than anything in my entire life.
I am shaking just telling this forum. It does feel a little better just to get it off my chest.
Thanks for being kind with your responses.
I was expecting to be told to get a life.


----------



## Dude007 (Jun 22, 2015)

TAMissues said:


> Not trying to turn this into a biology seminar. That story she told me has made me bawl my eyes out for countless hours.
> More than anything in my entire life.
> I am shaking just telling this forum. It does feel a little better just to get it off my chest.
> Thanks for being kind with your responses.
> I was expecting to be told to get a life.


This is no Biggie, get a LIFE!! DUDE


----------



## tom67 (Oct 2, 2012)

Like others have said go get some ic now.
Don't tell your wife.:smile2:


----------



## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good evening
Go to a sex toy site that caters to women. (good vibrations is OK). Look at the sizes of their most popular sex toys - most are in a fairly normal human range. Yes, there are a few giant ones, and some tiny ones ,but what most women enjoy is fairly average.


----------



## Cletus (Apr 27, 2012)

TAMissues said:


> I would appreciate a sincere comment on this. I'm to the point of needing a shrink about it.


I think you've answered your own question.


----------



## inhope (Nov 17, 2010)

Thound said:


> *I suggest you go ahead and see the shrink.* She loves you and wants to be with you. Don't ruin that because you think you can't possibly please her with your (*Correction: *) _ABOVE_ average tool. When you make love to her bring the passion and the bring the heat. If she was disappointed with your package, I doubt she would have married you, unless you're filthy rich.


Yes, I agree, you need to talk this one out.
I do not see you getting over this one by yourself.


----------



## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

You're fixated on an idea that you know is not an accurate assessment. The way to control and irradiate an irrational fixation is to:

1. Recognize it for what it is. Irrational and Incorrect

2. Educate yourself on what is correct. (Your wife's assurances are educating you of the correct version. Google has educated you on this "deformation thing" which is one of the most absurd notions I've ever heard. And this forum is educating you by reinforcing your wife's assessment.)

3. When this idea hits, you literally shake your head and recall the correct version. If you must. Get up and get busy elsewhere, write down the correct version. Do not allow yourself to dwell on the fixation because it is false.

4. Yes a shrink could help you but their going to tell you the same things I've said, but they will also teach you more ways of controlling it, not to mention possibly finding other areas in which you are prone to develop fixations. 

Fixations are similar to OCD and if you have OCD it's important to get that under control ASAP because the longer you allow those compulsions to run your life the more firmly planted they become. Don't accept this as part of who you are, fight it before it runs your life.


----------



## 4x4 (Apr 15, 2014)

It's easy to let insecurities about your partners past creep into your mind. If I find myself ever "going there" mentally, and I don't mean just regarding physical attributes, I flip the script. Looks at it from the other side. Maybe your wife is not the prettiest girl you dated, maybe her boobs are not as good as an ex's, maybe an ex had a better butt than her, a prettier smile, was more intelligent or funny, etc. Does that diminish your wife in your eyes? I bet it doesn't. So learn to let it go and trust when she tells you your the best for her. She married you, not him. Talk to a counselor if needed.


----------



## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

Your wife should stop waxing about captain penis to her friends as well.

If I heard you right, she brought it up in drunken conversation?

Her lack of discretion would bother me but not a former partners size.

I agree with IC and also more education about female sexuality.

Mrs. Conan's first husband had a log hanging between his legs. She didn't disclose this fact to friends but it slipped during a conversation with me.

I'm big but not OMG big. I am hands down the best lover she has ever had and that is one of many reasons she married me.

I could probably service her better with about half or less of what I have.

Most women are not size queens and it doesn't appear your wife is one either.

Do you think you are experiencing retroactive jealousy or are you just feeling insecure about captain dong?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## jorgegene (May 26, 2012)

4x4 said:


> It's easy to let insecurities about your partners past creep into your mind. If I find myself ever "going there" mentally, and I don't mean just regarding physical attributes, I flip the script. Looks at it from the other side. Maybe your wife is not the prettiest girl you dated, maybe her boobs are not as good as an ex's, maybe an ex had a better butt than her, a prettier smile, was more intelligent or funny, etc. Does that diminish your wife in your eyes? I bet it doesn't. So learn to let it go and trust when she tells you your the best for her. She married you, not him. Talk to a counselor if needed.


this is a great point. very once in a while i think about women i've had in the past. one had gigantic DD boobs. one had the most perfect v.j. i've ever seen (in real or anywhere else!). one was the prettiest, et. but none of them was like my wife. i'd take my wife over the combination of all of their assets. individually, assets only go so far. i've had the best sex with my wife than any of the others hands down.


----------



## Livvie (Jan 20, 2014)

Maybe what's driving you crazy about this is the fact that she actually told you this story about her sexual experience with another man and that she talks about it with her girlfriends, too.


----------



## terrence4159 (Feb 3, 2013)

man it is time for you to man up. who cares if he was bigger, my wife has been with guys bigger than me do i care, nope. unless your wife was a virgin odds are really good that she has been with bigger. my wife has admitted to others being bigger. i really really dont care. she says im the best she has ever had by a long ways and i beleive her.

she chose me and we have amazing sex....we have amazing love making sessions and we have amazing [email protected]@@@@G sessions where when she goes to work the next day they ask what happened because shes walking funny. get over your sad insecurities and enjoy sex with your wife.


----------



## jorgegene (May 26, 2012)

Livvie said:


> Maybe what's driving you crazy about this is the fact that she actually told you this story about her sexual experience with another man and that she talks about it with her girlfriends, too.


another good point. not the fact she had someone bigger, but that she talked about it. still. gotta let it go.


----------



## Yeswecan (Jul 25, 2014)

TAMissues said:


> I do please her with my ****. Make her orgasm with my mouth all the time and also during sex. She loves it and loves me. I love her. She is the love of my life.
> I just wish to God she had never shared that story. It's a festering wound on my brain. There are so many nights when I am horny and just cant do it because of the thought of that dude giving it to her.
> blaaaa. I guess a shrink might help. I's to the point where I want to leave her.


Get a grip dude. If you think this way with your W you certainly will with any after her.

Your W should stop talking about it to you and her friends. My W does not sit around and talk old conquests with me.


----------



## Lostinthought61 (Nov 5, 2013)

TAM....let me understand this you were crying because one of her past boyfriend has a bigger stick then you....i will be honest with you that is concerning and desperately shows a lack of self image on your part, that i think is the bigger issue. look at the end of the day she ended up with you not him....and i am pretty sure she had sex with you before she said yes, so she knew what she was getting. you really need to work on your self esteem. remember its only a tool....know how to use it, know how to make her happy, just don't be one.


----------



## I Don't Know (Oct 8, 2013)

I know it sucks. But think about this. The day before you found out she'd had bigger it was still a fact. The only thing that this changes is that you KNOW now.

You MUST NOT DIG! Knowing about your wife's past does no one any good. You least of all.

I know how this works. You'll think if I know what "he" (insert any of her exes) did that she liked you can do it too. Well you can, but you can't. Even if you do it a million times better, your mind will still tell you "he" did it better. Or she liked it more with "him". Or "he" did it first and therefore it's somehow better.

I don't know how you get over this, except to just know that nothing you can do will change the facts. Your wife can never reassure you enough that it won't bother you so don't ask her too.

And for the love of God, DON'T DIG FOR ANYTHING ELSE. I believe that temptation is coming. And you're stupid brain will convince you that you it's for your peace of mind. "If I know X then I'll feel better about Y." No. You won't. You'll just feel sh!tty about X AND Y.


----------



## DayOne (Sep 19, 2014)

tom67 said:


> Like others have said go get some ic now.
> *Don't tell your wife.*:smile2:


Or.. do! It's obviously bothering you, eating away at you. NOT communicating with her could cause more issues than it would solve. 

Say it fks with your head so much you get ED over it. Now, in your head you're not only 'less' than the monster she claims she was with, a long time ago. AND you can't get it up, due to stress. 

How much worse will that make you feel?

She needs to know it's bothering you. Talk about it, don't bottle it in, or just sneak off to counselling. 

Turn it around, look at it a different way. She's already said you're best she's had in the sack, and she MARRIED you, FFS! I'm assuming you guys 'got in on' before you married? She knew what she was getting into (or on to...) and chose you. She wanted the WHOLE package, not just a large,, er,,, package. 

And have a load of fun continuing to prove that your's works just fine! What you have already seems to satisfy her, look for new ways, together, to use it to leave her with her eyes crossed and her legs unable to move!


----------



## Cletus (Apr 27, 2012)

By definition half the men in the world have a below average sized penis.

Would you think it a healthy situation for every one of those men to waste energy worrying about the above average guy their girlfriend almost certainly had at one time or another in her past? Do we need a quarter of the world's population running around mad about the size of their johnson? 

Penis size ain't sh*t, man. When I got a case of middle-aged Peyronie's, I lost some length, some girth, and gained some curvature that was all brand new to me. It took a little fiddling to figure things out, but today that poor little beat-down shadow of my former male glory still gets the job done each and every time it is used, and sometimes more than once in a given session. Spend your mental energy on the stuff that matters and follow the advice of the folks who know something about behavior modification. 

You are unhealthy and you're going to have to do some hard work to fix it.


----------



## Hardtohandle (Jan 10, 2013)

Cognitive thinking my friend.. 

I have issues with the GF past and the such.. I am learning now how to change my thoughts.. Its all about you.. But you basically need to retrain your brain when it comes to this.. Which again is what I am trying to do..

physical appearance and getting in shape.. Here is something I can be honest about.. 

When I was 315LBS I had an average penis size.. 

At 230, I have a much larger penis.. MUCH LARGER.. 

Also you need to remember as was already said.. Big D!ck does not mean he knows how to use it.. Even my GF told me a story about a guy with a big penis, he was a nude model from an art class she took.. She dated him, Why because he had a big d!ck.. But didn't know how to use it and was a minute man..

On a side note she also told me she dated a guy with a small penis that was really good. 

Again I know what you are going through.. My fantasy mind movies caused me a lot of issues in my relationship.. 

What your doing now is making yourself the victim and using that to punish her ( I can't have sex with you because of what you told me, it's your fault ).. Again I know because I did the same thing with other stuff.. 

This sort of stuff will follow you with any relationship you are in and not just this one.. If it isn't this, you will make up something else with another person.. 

Therapy helps.. But you need to fight yourself.. I literally tell myself to stop being a jerk0ff and that I love this woman.. It is literally like the normal side is fighting off the crazy side of me.. 

If you are overweight, lose the weight and YOU WILL get a bigger Penis size..


----------



## SecondTime'Round (Jan 15, 2015)

Hardtohandle said:


> Also you need to remember as was already said.. Big D!ck does not mean he knows how to use it.. Even my GF told me a story about a guy with a big penis, he was a nude model from an art class she took.. She dated him, Why because he had a big d!ck.. But didn't know how to use it and was a minute man..


So, the only thing that was satisfied was her curiosity!


----------



## Hardtohandle (Jan 10, 2013)

SecondTime'Round said:


> So, the only thing that was satisfied was her curiosity!


Need a rimshot on that one..


----------



## Melvynman (Mar 19, 2014)

You are normal and healthy! Your problem is lack of understanding human sexuality. Stop listening to hearsay about human sexuality that is only trying to control women reproductive rights. 

Human are animals in case you didn't know. We have been evolving for millions of years. Women evolved into sexually promiscuous animals. Males evolved to compete at the sperm level. The heads of penis are shaped to pull sperm out and will pull out 95%. The sound, smell, thought and seeing others having sex should excite you, you should be driven to compete sexually with others. Stop beating yourself and go have sex with you wife and compete like your driven too.


----------



## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

I love Melvyn!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## McDean (Jun 13, 2015)

To put in a different light, consider back in the day when you and your buddies sat around talking about women, you probably talked about the girl with the big t1ts and/or nice a$$ etc...but did you really care, because in the end you are with any of them (not that your wife may not have both of those in spades) but just like us, women talk and of course things that stand out make the gossip....but again, who is she with? Not that guy, you.....don't think for a minute she is settling either, that is unhealthy thinking!


----------



## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Thound said:


> If she was disappointed with your package, I doubt she would have married you, unless you're filthy rich.


I disagree with this. There are many, many women who are willing to give up sexual fulfillment and attraction towards their husbands in exchange for security and dependability. We see it all the time.


----------



## TAMissues (Aug 14, 2015)

Thanks for all the good suggestions. Frankly the way she told me and how I know it's "funny" story with her friends is what bothers me the most.
I will work on changing my mental subject when I start to obsess.
Her x was a moron and a kid and surely didn't know how to have sex well.
And yes, I guess me not being affectionate with her is trying to punish her and make her feel miserable too.
Lastly I know I need to man up and say who gives a sH#!.

I am sure there are good books on dismissing bad thoughts.
People with real problems surely read them. I just don't want this of all things to end my marriage.
I know it's not OCD but like someone posted sounds pretty similar.

Feel like a fool making this into a big deal and going to this forum but I must say it has helped.


----------



## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Livvie said:


> Maybe what's driving you crazy about this is the fact that she actually told you this story about her sexual experience with another man and that she talks about it with her girlfriends, too.



And most of that talk is bull cookies. 

Let me let you dudes in on a little piece of info....

Men are not the only ones who engage in locker room banter. We are not the only ones who exaggerate about our sexual prowess, and we are not the only ones who brag and exaggerate about the sexual abilities of some of the women we have been with. 

Women are no different. When they sit in their hen parties they will flat out exaggerate, brag, and lie to one another about the gi-normous gorilla d!cks they have squatted on, and all the multiple screaming orgasms these imaginary John Holmeses have given them... 

They are waaaay more shameless than men when it comes to smack-talk like this. It's a competition. It's all for show. It is nothing more than women strutting, preening and competing against each other to make themselves out to be the most desirable, sensuous, sex goddess in the room. 

I'ts a bunch of crap that men should ignore like last year's Arizona Cardinal's football record....


----------



## SecondTime'Round (Jan 15, 2015)

TAMissues said:


> Feel like a fool making this into a big deal and going to this forum but I must say it has helped.


You're not a fool . We've encountered way more foolishness than that here at TAM!


----------



## SecondTime'Round (Jan 15, 2015)

bandit.45 said:


> And most of that talk is bull cookies.
> 
> Let me let you dudes in on a little piece of info....
> 
> ...


This does not describe me and my relationships with my girlfriends at all.....


----------



## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

TAMissues said:


> Thanks for all the good suggestions. Frankly the way she told me and how I know it's "funny" story with her friends is what bothers me the most.
> I will work on changing my mental subject when I start to obsess.
> Her x was a moron and a kid and surely didn't know how to have sex well.
> And yes, I guess me not being affectionate with her is trying to punish her and make her feel miserable too.
> ...



Dude, you got her off before...you can get her off again...

You are your own enemy here. Who gives a flying fvck what your wife and her bimbo friends yak about? Seriously! Fvck them and their goodbar dreams! 

When you get her in that bedroom you ravish her and enjoy her...she's yours brother. Your territory. Stake your claim, plant that flag and fvck her into a speech impediment....


----------



## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

SecondTime'Round said:


> This does not describe me and my relationships with my girlfriends at all.....


I'm not talking about the White Cross Quilters Club here.....


----------



## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

SecondTime'Round said:


> This does not describe me and my relationships with my girlfriends at all.....


That locker room attitude is often outgrown. I actually never kissed and told.

Several of my partners did though. Mrs. Conan and I have had discussions about sexual history and we have one couple we share almost everything with.

I think OP just needs to talk boundaries with his wife when it comes to telling tales.

She may be fine with him talking about a past partner with unusual parts but he clearly isn't.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

I've overheard conversations between women on GNOs at Scottsdale restaurants and clubs that would curl your toes. Each woman at the table would take her turn trying to outclass the other women with sordid tales of debauchery... mostly dealing with sexcapades between her and her younger lover. Some of that talk made me lose my appetite.


----------



## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

The package on one of my exes was huge, but he sucked in bed. And he was an all around pathetic man. .... its not the penis size but the man attached to it that matters. Big d!ck doesn't necessarily equal real man. 

Besides, does your wife have the biggest breasts or best body you've been with? If not should she ruin your sex life over it?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## EllisRedding (Apr 10, 2015)

I say get a penis enlargement, out size her ex, and you won't have to worry about it anymore :wink2: Plus, it will save you a trip to IC .... Just be warned if you get this reaction ...


----------



## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

TAM, this is just a splinter in your mind. That's all it is. Can you think of it that way and work on taking the splinter out without it becoming infected?

One time I read a story about the death penalty and how lethal injection works, and it created a similar splinter for me. For months afterwards I was constantly thinking about the horrors of being lethally injected, and the gruesome death that would occur (my own). I do not know why the story locked into my mind like that but it did. 

It took some time and effort for me to stop having those constant thoughts. It made me feel insane!

But eventually I worked the splinter out. It did not require counseling, as it truly did not come from a hangup I have. Rather it was more like a literal splinter. It got caught in some of my neurons. 

If you can look at it like this you will have a better chance of getting the splinter out.


----------



## Lostinthought61 (Nov 5, 2013)

Faithful Wife said:


> TAM, this is just a splinter in your mind. That's all it is. Can you think of it that way and work on taking the splinter out without it becoming infected?
> 
> One time I read a story about the death penalty and how lethal injection works, and it created a similar splinter for me. For months afterwards I was constantly thinking about the horrors of being lethally injected, and the gruesome death that would occur (my own). I do not know why the story locked into my mind like that but it did.
> 
> ...



Interesting analogy Faithful, i guess in both ways they have to deal with a little prick huh. :smile2:


----------



## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Xenote said:


> Interesting analogy Faithful, i guess in both ways they have to deal with a little prick huh. :smile2:


:rofl:


----------



## Cosmos (May 4, 2012)

IMO, it was highly inappropriate for your W to tell you about the size of the other guy's penis. What purpose could it possibly serve other than to get you 'thinking?' People really don't need to hear such intimate details about previous partners / relationships, and I can'tunderstand why they even go there.

However, you tell us that you are completely 'normal' in that department, so I would really try to move on from this with your head held high.


----------



## bigfoot (Jan 22, 2014)

Dude, I am going to hit you with 4 points to illustrate the needless anxious thoughts that you are having.

1. Anecdotal from a friend: A girl he was dating told him about the time that she ALMOST hooked up with a famous pro athlete. She said that once they were going to have sex and they took their clothes off, she saw his "mule ****" and she asked him, "where do you plan on putting that?!" She got dressed and left. BTW she had given birth.

2. From a female friend: I had a friend who dated a pro-athlete who was HUGE. When they had sex, she was making all kind of noise and crying out "oh my gawd". He thought she was enjoying it. She said, it was all I could say. She said it was painful, uncomfortable, she could not wait until he finished, and the best part was when it was over. 

3. My own experience: Hooked up with a woman and she flat out told me to "stop going so deep", it hurt.

4. My own experience: I used to creep around with this lady in college. She dated a basketball player. He was built like a mack truck and hung like a horse. To quote her, "his thing scared the sh&t" out of her. Who did she prefer to hook up with. Me. I was not built, I was not huge, but I got the job done.

My point is this, get porn out of your mind. Get size queens out of your mind. In my life, I have only heard of one true size queen. She was in that music TLC. Her name was Chili. Other than that, unless you literally have nothing to worry about.


----------



## ThePheonix (Jan 3, 2013)

TAMissues said:


> I just wish to God she had never shared that story. It's a festering wound on my brain. There are so many nights when I am horny and just cant do it because of the thought of that dude giving it to her.
> blaaaa. I guess a shrink might help. I's to the point where I want to leave her.


Ya man I know what you mean. Back when I was escorting I had a client that use to take me to Mexico Beach Florida a few time a year. Her husband was 6'7" with a 9-10 inch tool, a good bit bigger than me. It used to bug me big time wondering if I was earning my money or she was just being kind and generous. > 
I'll just add if you really want to leave her because an ex has a larger tool than you, first your a dumbazz and second, some average guy with a smaller mule than her ex will take over plowing the field that you walked away from because you didn't think you had the equipment equal to a previous owner.


----------



## hookares (Dec 7, 2011)

I haven't heard anything about penis size and my less than average unit since I split with my cheating ex wife.
Of course I only date the same gal only four months at the most.
>


----------



## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Work on you oral skills, hand skills, finger skills....

If you work a woman up right she isn't going to care about c0cksize.


----------



## 241happyhour (Jan 31, 2011)

TAMissues said:


> I do hit her cervix myself. I think I feel a huge deformation in it from her x which is another one of my insane thoughts.



Dude---get some help. If you let **** like this get to you where you want to leave, your going to have a long road ahead.


----------



## thread the needle (May 4, 2015)

Would you rather be the best or the biggest?

For your own well being, simply top being an idiot and embrace your wife's preference for you. 

A big **** isn't all it's cracked up to be. Ask the ladies.


----------



## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

thread the needle said:


> Would you rather be the best or the biggest?
> 
> For your own well being, simply top being an idiot and embrace your wife's preference for you.
> 
> A big **** isn't all it's cracked up to be. Ask the ladies.


No. They lie.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## CTPlay (Apr 26, 2015)

This thread is awesome. 

Hey look. According to my STBX, my Mr. PeePee is extraordinarily tiny. Especially when it's cold. Man, it just plain turtle's up when the frost comes! It looks like a hairy thumb! 

So look. Consider yourself lucky that you are "average". I mean, can you imagine the alternative? Next time you think your one eye monster is on the "wee" side of things, just let go and enjoy having sex with your wife. Talk filthy! Some women love it!


----------



## gouge_away (Apr 7, 2015)

Umm, getting it in has less to do with size and more to do with lack of hardness. Its no secret, guys with huge penises don't get nearly as hard as guys with average penises.

Believe her when she says you rock the c0ck. She's probably telling you the truth, a little above average to a little below average is the sweet spot.


----------



## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

TAMissues said:


> I do hit her cervix myself. *I think I feel a huge deformation in it from her x* which is another one of my insane thoughts.


LOL. No you don't.

Seriously... I am laughing so hard right now.


----------



## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

TAMissues said:


> alright...I'm wrong about the deformation. It does feel like a left turn when I hit it.
> 
> Learned this on Google just now.
> 
> "feels much like a cul-de-sac on a dead-end street, a curved pocket you can feel deep inside the vagina, tucked under the cervix. Technically speaking, it's an erogenous zone in the Anterior Fornix, the area in the back of the vagina into which the cervix protrudes."


Unless you're hitting it dead center every time, it's going to slip a bit when you hit. If it consistently slips to the left, it probably has more to do w/ your thrusting technique than anything.

Still laughing, BTW.


----------



## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

GusPolinski said:


> LOL. No you don't.
> 
> Seriously... I am laughing so hard right now.


Hey! Not funny!

How would you like it if your ol' lady's vag was all bent up from captain dong? 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

TAMissues said:


> Not trying to turn this into a biology seminar. That story she told me has made me bawl my eyes out for countless hours.
> More than anything in my entire life.
> I am shaking just telling this forum. It does feel a little better just to get it off my chest.
> Thanks for being kind with your responses.
> I was expecting to be told to get a life.


Dude. Some guys are just bigger, but that doesn't always equal better. Additionally, a penis CAN be so large that it causes discomfort (and even pain) for anyone on the receiving end.

And yeah, you'll hear some women say that size matters, bigger is better, etc, but keep in mind that -- just like men -- women are "sized" differently as well. IOW, there are plenty of women for whom an average penis won't do the trick. But that likely just means that they have larger-than-average vaginas.


----------



## Mostlycontent (Apr 16, 2014)

gouge_away said:


> Umm, getting it in has less to do with size and more to do with lack of hardness. Its no secret, guys with huge penises don't get nearly as hard as guys with average penises.
> 
> Believe her when she says you rock the c0ck. *She's probably telling you the truth, a little above average to a little below average is the sweet spot.*



Here's the thing about penis size. If the choice was to be either too big or too small, I'm betting that 100% of guys would choose to be too big.

However, that is not the choice. Being average to a bit above average is absolutely where you want to be. 

If you're a little big, there are some women with whom you are disqualified because of the pain and discomfort. If you're a lot big, there's probably half the female population off the table and if you're really big, then likely three quarters of the female population wouldn't be able to deal with you and perhaps more than that. Hey, that's when you go to the Porn Industry in search of a job.

I've been with enough women to know that most of them do not want someone with a super-sized c0ck.


----------



## alexm (Nov 29, 2008)

ConanHub said:


> Your wife should stop waxing about captain penis to her friends as well.
> 
> If I heard you right, she brought it up in drunken conversation?
> 
> Her lack of discretion would bother me but not a former partners size.


I'm three pages behind, so sorry, but while I agree with the above, I also don't think his wife still talks about this little story as anything more than a humorous anecdote. As in, she's not talking about this guys penis in a positive light.

While it's a rather crude story to bring up, even amongst her female friends, I think this can be chalked up to any number of little stories and anecdotes that we all have and laugh about 10, 20 or 50 years later.

Imagine the roles were reversed, and you had a girlfriend once who was so tight, you had trouble getting it in without some work and a lot of patience, and therefore, sex with her was not as fun as it should be, and generally not very good. But this girl had a freakishly small vagina. THAT'S the story, not how good it was, or how awesome her tiny vagina was.

I think OP is most definitely over-reacting at the gist of the story - the meaning behind why it's still talked about. It's because he had a freak penis that was NOT awesome and therefore caused trouble, and is now able to be laughed at, I suppose. It's really no different if he had a freakishly small penis to her. She probably talks about some guy she slept with who had a tiny penis. OP says she's been with 10-12 guys? Odds are high that at least one of them had a small tool. And obviously at least one guy had a massive one. Guess what guys? Neither is good. And both can and do stand out to some women. So why are we men able to laugh at women's stories about some guy who's penis was as big as her finger, but not at the stories of the guy who's penis was the size of her forearm? Neither are good.

However, she most definitely should not be talking about this type of thing, good or bad, to her husband, and also should probably have enough class to not talk about it when he's not around.

My wife did this once. I don't even remember the context, or why it came up, but somehow it came up that some guy she dated (or maybe just slept with, I don't know) was into spanking - something she had no interest in, and thought was weird. And that was the point of her story, not that she had fond memories of it, or him.

But, like OP, it's been ingrained in my head ever since. She didn't speak about this in a positive manner, but to her, it was a funny thing that happened to her at some point before I came along. To my credit, I did tell her that I would prefer not to hear about things like this, even if they were negative or funny, again. It's not a jealousy thing (I'm not into spanking, she's not into spanking, so it's not something this guy had over me or anything). But like OP, the visions of some guy spanking my wife's a** is not something I particularly want in my head.


----------



## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

Mostlycontent said:


> Here's the thing about penis size. If the choice was to be either too big or too small, I'm betting that 100% of guys would choose to be too big.


Once, while on an impromptu lunch date a couple of years ago, Mrs. Gus and I had the following conversation...

Mrs. Gus: "I hate being so short. Why couldn't I be at least a couple of inches taller?"

Me: (smirking) "Yeah, I wouldn't mind a couple more inches myself."

Mrs. Gus: (with a sort of cross-eyed look) "What, are you trying to kill me?"

:lol: :rofl:


----------



## imperfectworld (Jan 18, 2015)

Unfortunately, this isn't simply about sex. You may think it is, but if it is retroactive jealousy you have only started the long, dark journey. 

Regardless of what's commonly put out here, I always say people have a right to their feelings.


----------



## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

imperfectworld said:


> Unfortunately, this isn't simply about sex. You may think it is, but if it is retroactive jealousy you have only started the long, dark journey.
> 
> Regardless of what's commonly put out here, I always say people have a right to their feelings.


We definitely do have a right to our feelings. But if our feelings make us feel like sh*t, and further if they make us act mean and resent and punish our partner, do we still have a right to them?

What if the OP can see these feelings as a temporary state he is experiencing, rather than some all important emotional "truth"?

What if the feelings are transitory and will change over time?

Yes, we have a right to our feelings. But what if we'd prefer to rid ourselves of them? That's ok, too, right?

Things like this can end up being like phobias and other obsessions. They sometimes don't "mean anything"...sometimes they are just mental habits that can be overcome with a little time, effort and patience.

Not all feelings are worth fighting to keep. Some are worth fighting to rid ourselves of.


----------



## Cynthia (Jan 31, 2014)

You have gotten some great advice.
You are comparing yourself to a man that your wife was not impressed with. His size was a problem, not an asset. She is glad that you don't have the same problem that he had. Be thankful that you have what your wife wants and needs. Now focus on that and get back to enjoying your wife.


----------



## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

bandit.45 said:


> And most of that talk is bull cookies.
> 
> Let me let you dudes in on a little piece of info....
> 
> ...



1. We do not exaggerate and lie about our sex lives. We really do have great stories to tell.

2. It's not a competition, it's bonding. We aren't competing, we are sharing. We aren't strutting, preening or posing, we are relating.

3. Next time make yourself know when you're eves dropping on women. Some of this stuff is copyright protected!


----------



## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

Anon Pink said:


> 1. We do not exaggerate and lie about our sex lives. We really do have great stories to tell.
> 
> 2. It's not a competition, it's bonding. We aren't competing, we are sharing. We aren't strutting, preening or posing, we are relating.
> 
> 3. Next time make yourself know when you're eves dropping on women. Some of this stuff is copyright protected!


Sing it, sistah.

When my girls are I are dishing, we aren't making sh*t up. We are sharing about ourselves and our lives. And ooooooooohhhhh the stories I've heard from friends....better than any fiction I've ever read. :toast:


----------



## Decorum (Sep 7, 2012)

Oh good, its been a while since a size thread.

I don't fret about my wife prior experience because I know in my core it the whole package.

Women can fret about how they measure up too, and if we are going to get the tape measure out we both will fall short here or there. Dont be myopic, its the whole package, my wife and I have been married for 28 years, prior partners measurements mean nothing to me, I barely remember them because I just dont care.

I can find a woman who likes my "whole package" if my partner decides she does not, and that is the point, its the partner not the package, unless you or she married unwisely and needs a donkey size member.

That's why there are lawyers, to screw you when your wife doesn't want to. (yeah that was cheap)


----------



## gouge_away (Apr 7, 2015)

The fact she didn't marry the guy and married you should be hint #1 your c0ck is better.

The fact they still joke about freak c0ck should be clue #2 you c0ck is better.


----------



## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

Decorum said:


> That's why there are lawyers, to screw you when your wife doesn't want to. (yeah that was cheap)


bah dum tss


----------



## lostmyreligion (Oct 18, 2013)

gouge_away said:


> The fact she didn't marry the guy and married you should be hint #1 your c0ck is better.
> 
> The fact they still joke about freak c0ck should be clue #2 you c0ck is better.


This :iagree:

I know all about my wife's former love life. I asked when we first started dating and she told me. 

It was extensive. 

A couple were really big, and one was just plain huge. 

The huge guy she pawned off to a girl friend after the one and only time they did it because no matter how gentle he tried to be, "It focken hurt!".

I think she said to me something to the effect of 'Since you don't have the plumbing, try to imagine having a beer can shoved up your a$$.'

The really big guys were uncomfortable for her and worse - just plain lazy. Their egos were so wrapped up in their d!ck size that they felt all they had to do was pull it out and lay back while she worshiped at the alter of their mammoth member.

I've never had reason to doubt her about this. When I asked her how I stacked up, she said that I was slightly larger than most but more importantly, I was a *perfect* fit and seriously know how to please her with it. She's told me "Gawd I love your ****" more times than I could count in the last 20 yrs. 

Her final words on the topic were "I tried the rest and married the best".


----------



## lostmyreligion (Oct 18, 2013)

I might only have 4 inches, but I figure that's wide enough for any woman.


----------



## alexm (Nov 29, 2008)

This really isn't a penis size thread, ladies and gents.

What this is, is OP now having a mental image of his wife with somebody else, who just happens to have a (too) big tool.

Worse, the image is more or less specific - some guy trying to fit his elephant junk into his wife's vagina.

This isn't even related to jealousy, IMO. As I said in my post above, I heard a specific sexually-related anecdote involving my wife, from her own mouth, involving something she did not like, did not speak fondly of and was able to laugh about in the end.

The consequence was that this created a mental image in my mind, of my wife naked, with somebody else who was spanking her.

My wife has had sex with more partners than I have, and I am fine with that. She wasn't a virgin when we started dating, and neither was I. I also have some interesting anecdotes and memories (good, bad, weird and funny). It goes without saying.

She would be just as uncomfortable with me bringing up this that or the other thing, as I was hearing about her little story. She doesn't need to picture me with somebody else, especially in a specific scenario.

It doesn't matter if my anecdote was funny or just plain weird. For example, my ex wife once practically broke my tool once when she was on top and riding me hard. Came off to far and slammed down with her pelvic bone or something. There was a cracking sound, which I will remember the rest of my life. It hurt for weeks. To this day, I can't enjoy the woman on top position if my wife starts really moving and riding me hard.

Is this something I would ever mention to my wife? Of course not. Just like I don't want to hear about Joe Blow who was into spanking and tried to do it to her.

Hell, this type of thing doesn't even have to be sexual in nature. I don't particularly want to hear any stories about my wife and her ex, good, bad, or humorous, nor does she want to hear about mine. I realized some years ago that I subconsciously use "I" and "me" when I talk about experiences I had with my ex wife. I talk about the house she and I bought together, yet I say "my old house", or "the house I lived in", or "the first house I bought". "I went on vacation here" or "I lived in this city", "My old dog", "my couch", "my car", and on and on. I've subconsciously removed my ex wife from the old stories I have when she's not a relevant part of them. I didn't even realize I did this until it dawned on me one day.

My ex wife broke my ****. I can laugh/cringe at it now, but my wife does not need to hear about it, even if it becomes relevant. If my wife happens to do this to me (god forbid), should I tell her my ex did it, too? This isn't the first time it's happened?

My ex wife, when we were dating (over 20 years ago now) once pointed out a big flat rock in the middle of a park near her house and said, no joke, that's a great place to have sex and we should go there one night and do it. There was just so many things wrong with that statement. To this day, I still drive by that park a few times a week, and the stupid rock catches my eye every time. I haven't even seen my ex wife in almost 7 years, and that f****** rock is still there.


----------



## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

GusPolinski said:


> Dude. Some guys are just bigger, but that doesn't always equal better. Additionally, a penis CAN be so large that it causes discomfort (and even pain) for anyone on the receiving end.
> 
> And yeah, you'll hear some women say that size matters, bigger is better, etc, but keep in mind that -- just like men -- women are "sized" differently as well. IOW, there are plenty of women for whom an average penis won't do the trick. But that likely just means that they have larger-than-average vaginas.


Size only matters of you're ridiculously small. If you've got at least an average one that you know how to use you're great for most women. The marginal benefit we get for every little bit above average is minimal at best and in some cases negative.

Geez, did I just sound like s nerd at the end of that paragraph?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

alexm said:


> This really isn't a penis size thread, ladies and gents.
> 
> What this is, is OP now having a mental image of his wife with somebody else, who just happens to have a (too) big tool.
> 
> ...



Dude, I wish you could've spoken to my hb early on in our relationship when he felt the need to run his mouth about all kinds of exes. I've since put a stop to that, we won't get into how though many here have heard the story and it involves among other things, telling him about the huge c0ck on my first. But it did damage our relationship because among other things it made me feel like one in a long line. I have plenty of things I could throw in his face but it always seemed trashy to do that. 

This is why I think one should keep their mouth shut regarding exes and only answer specific questions so you know you're only providing what your partner wants to know.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

lifeistooshort said:


> Size only matters of you're ridiculously small. If you've got at least an average one that you know how to use you're great for most women. The marginal benefit we get for every little bit above average is minimal at best and in some cases negative.
> 
> Geez, did I just sound like s nerd at the end of that paragraph?



Diminishing returns? Limits?

Sounds like calculus to me!

NEEEEEEEEERRRRD!!!!!

:lol: :rofl:


----------



## Cynthia (Jan 31, 2014)

It's not the size of your wife's ex that is causing the problem. It is your reaction to it and your dwelling on it, rather than dwelling on what you describe as a great relationship prior to the disclosure. Let it go and love your wife.


----------



## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

GusPolinski said:


> Diminishing returns? Limits?
> 
> Sounds like calculus to me!
> 
> ...


Hey, don't be knocking us nerds. Chances are you work for one, remember? 

We rule the world!!!!! Well except those that still live in mom's basement and b!tch on reddit about how women don't like "nice guys". :grin2:
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

GusPolinski said:


> Diminishing returns? Limits?
> 
> Sounds like calculus to me!
> 
> ...


Brings more meaning to the term "unit".

Maybe she could invent the penometriculator. An obvious necessity for ladies to measure relative pleasure.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

ConanHub said:


> Brings more meaning to the term "unit".
> 
> Maybe she could invent the penometriculator. An obvious necessity for ladies to measure relative pleasure.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I'd need to plot some charts and do some trend analysis first.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Truthseeker1 (Jul 17, 2013)

lifeistooshort said:


> Dude, I wish you could've spoken to my hb early on in our relationship when he felt the need to run his mouth about all kinds of exes. I've since put a stop to that, we won't get into how though many here have heard the story and it involves among other things, telling him about the huge c0ck on my first. But it did damage our relationship because among other things it made me feel like one in a long line. I have plenty of things I could throw in his face but it always seemed trashy to do that.
> 
> This is why I think one should keep their mouth shut regarding exes and only answer specific questions so you know you're only providing what your partner wants to know.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Agreed...why does she keep bringing it up and going into such gory details. Maybe I'm wrong but it seems crass and improper. I went out to dinner one night with a couple who just got back from their honeymoon. There were other people at the table and the subject came up about how they met, the online dating site they used, etc. All in all a normal conversation up until that point. Then the husband decides to go into "sharing mode" and tell us about all the women he slept with from that site before he met his wife. It wasn't just an off hand comment he went on for about 5 minutes or so talking about it. People just stared at him - the look of disgust on his new wifes face was obvious. Sharing like that can be crass and immature.


----------



## imperfectworld (Jan 18, 2015)

alexm said:


> Hell, this type of thing doesn't even have to be sexual in nature. I don't particularly want to hear any stories about my wife and her ex, good, bad, or humorous, nor does she want to hear about mine. I realized some years ago that I subconsciously use "I" and "me" when I talk about experiences I had with my ex wife. I talk about the house she and I bought together, yet I say "my old house", or "the house I lived in", or "the first house I bought". "I went on vacation here" or "I lived in this city", "My old dog", "my couch", "my car", and on and on. I've subconsciously removed my ex wife from the old stories I have when she's not a relevant part of them. I didn't even realize I did this until it dawned on me one day.


I wish I could give you 10 thumbs up for your post.

Now go watch this video short and see if you can contain your emotions:

*Still *- By Dan Woodliff - _A moment revisiting memories._
https://vimeo.com/129033960


----------



## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

lifeistooshort said:


> I'd need to plot some charts and do some trend analysis first.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Make a good episode of Shark Tank.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*Regardless of the overly attractive attributes of both the male and female physique and genitalia, the overriding fact of the matter remains that what it is that we're ultimately attracted to in the opposite sex is foremostly their psychological attributes and how it relates to and the effect that is has on us, more especially as members of the opposite sex!

Nothing more and nothing less! The size of the man's penis or of the woman's breasts is strictly secondary ~ or at least should be!*
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## lostmyreligion (Oct 18, 2013)

I asked about her previous sex life because I needed to know what she had tried and liked. Jealousy and tooling insecurity were never an issue for me. That was _her_ past and I have what I have. I was thankful that she shared it with me because it gave me the information I needed to maximize tooling effectiveness.


----------



## lostmyreligion (Oct 18, 2013)

There might have been a voyeuristic component as well.

But that's the open door to the darkened basement in horror movies...


----------



## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

lifeistooshort said:


> Hey, don't be knocking us nerds. Chances are you work for one, remember?
> 
> We rule the world!!!!! Well except those that still live in mom's basement and b!tch on reddit about how women don't like "nice guys". :grin2:



LOL... I'm actually quite the nerd myself.


----------



## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

Truthseeker1 said:


> Agreed...why does she keep bringing it up and going into such gory details. Maybe I'm wrong but it seems crass and improper. I went out to dinner one night with a couple who just got back from their honeymoon. There were other people at the table and the subject came up about how they met, the online dating site they used, etc. All in all a normal conversation up until that point. Then the husband decides to go into "sharing mode" and tell us about all the women he slept with from that site before he met his wife. It wasn't just an off hand comment he went on for about 5 minutes or so talking about it. People just stared at him - the look of disgust on his new wifes face was obvious. Sharing like that can be crass and immature.



Wow. What a f*cking retard.


----------



## Truthseeker1 (Jul 17, 2013)

GusPolinski said:


> Wow. What a f*cking retard.


 @GusPolinski he even provided an example or two saying things like when I went out with this one girl we knew it was going nowhere and we were not going to have a serious reltionhip so we just gor to the sex If looks could kill his wife would be doing jail tme for murder. :banghead:


----------



## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

Truthseeker1 said:


> Agreed...why does she keep bringing it up and going into such gory details. Maybe I'm wrong but it seems crass and improper. I went out to dinner one night with a couple who just got back from their honeymoon. There were other people at the table and the subject came up about how they met, the online dating site they used, etc. All in all a normal conversation up until that point. Then the husband decides to go into "sharing mode" and tell us about all the women he slept with from that site before he met his wife. It wasn't just an off hand comment he went on for about 5 minutes or so talking about it. People just stared at him - the look of disgust on his new wifes face was obvious. Sharing like that can be crass and immature.



Right? We were having dinner with my hb's former next door neighbors and hb starts going on about some girl he dated in the 70's (like anyone cares) and how they went out and drank lots of beer and did this and that. The hb just looked uncomfortable and the wife looked at me with this look of pity.

I even ran some of the things he would say by a couple of married guys I ran with at my old job for perspective and both thought it was in very poor taste. One told me that if he spoke to his wife like that she'd kick him out.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Truthseeker1 (Jul 17, 2013)

lifeistooshort said:


> Right? We were having dinner with my hb's former next door neighbors and hb starts going on about some girl he dated in the 70's (like anyone cares) and how they went out and drank lots of beer and did this and that. The hb just looked uncomfortable and the wife looked at me with this look of pity.
> 
> I even ran some of the things he would say by a couple of married guys I ran with at my old job for perspective and both thought it was in very poor taste. One told me that if he spoke to his wife like that she'd kick him out.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Wow...it is simply inappropriate. In addition how does the OP's wife think talking about the man she almost married huge member is going to make her husband feel? He didn't ask to know she blurted it out - it seems childish to me - like a HS boy bragging he just got laid. These are HS antics. 

I agree with the advice he should move on but absolutely understand why it stings. How would the wife feel if he went on about how his previous girlfriend was the hottest woman he ever dated?


----------



## November (Nov 28, 2013)

I could strongly argue that discussions about former lovers be totally off the table. No upside.

If you want to know what your mate likes, or desires, ask and try... you'll find out. 

To let a past relationship of your mate bother you to the point of needing counseling, then get some counseling.


----------



## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

Truthseeker1 said:


> Wow...it is simply inappropriate. In addition how does the OP's wife think talking about the man she almost married huge member is going to make her husband feel? He didn't ask to know she blurted it out - it seems childish to me - like a HS boy bragging he just got laid. These are HS antics.
> 
> I agree with the advice he should move on but absolutely understand why it stings. How would the wife feel if he went on about how his previous girlfriend was the hottest woman he ever dated?


Oh I could tell you stories that part of you would wonder if I was making up because you wouldn't be able to fathom how anyone would do that, and hb was in his 50's. Here's one: I happened to mention having stretch marks and he went off about how he had a gf with stretch marks and they'd be having sex and she'd ask him to close his eyes. And this story, like all the others, was repeated multiple times until I finally snapped and tore him a new ahole. 

I do think he should move on, I did, though I'd be lying if I said it didn't still p!ss me off sometimes. One thing that helped me was to realize that hb was driven by his own insecurities. .... people that are secure don't feel the need to do this. So look at them from a perspective of pity that they feel the need to bring this stuff up. I feel no need to dredge up my past to throw in hb's face, and if what I offer doesn't suit him it will suit a lot of others and he knows it. Maybe such a perspective would help op.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## NoChoice (Feb 12, 2012)

OP,
Your thought process is illogical. Without surgical intervention, you cannot alter your physical size. Do you feel inadequate that several of your wife's former boyfriends were taller than you? What of their tongue size? This could not be more irrelevant.

Also, if you left your wife will you spend the rest of your days alone? How will you find a woman who has only been with guys smaller than you? Will you have them fill out a questionnaire prior to the first date? This is nonsensical.

The female body can accommodate the passage of very large objects through the canal (think baby) and still return to normal. I have been involved in several births and have yet to see a woman enjoy it. Your wife's ex, who was not the size of a newborn infant I can assure you, has not permanently deformed her nor has he given her this extraordinary pleasure you feel he has.

These thoughts should be immediately dismissed as entertaining them is foolish and damaging. And lastly, I would posit that her ex has actually left a lasting impression on YOU not her. When you two prepare to be intimate her thoughts are about the blissful union that is about to happen, yours are about her ex! You can control your mind if you choose to but you must choose to. No counselor, therapist or psychiatrist can make you stop until you want to and do. This is all on you. Let it go and enjoy the woman who has pledged her love, her life and her V to YOU.


----------



## Me Vietare (Nov 26, 2014)

Not to thread jack, but since others have, I'll make a contribution to the spousal blurt collection. 

My sweetie, whose favorite position is corpse, once commented that a former boyfriend was into B&D. I'm picking my jaw up from the grassy ground, as she's never, never ever indicated a desire for anything like that. Or, for that matter, anything. 

So, now I'm thinking; "where is that woman? How can I find her?" Not for B&D or Shades of Anything, but just for some variety and passion/desire. 

Oh well, she has other good qualities, but dayam.>

And, no I don't think it's me. Fit. A cultured Alpha. And never had any trouble with any of the other owners of "Y" chromosomes that I've had the pleasure of knowing.


----------



## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

Me Vietare said:


> Not to thread jack, but since others have, I'll make a contribution to the spousal blurt collection.
> 
> My sweetie, whose favorite position is corpse, once commented that a former boyfriend was into B&D. I'm picking my jaw up from the grassy ground, as she's never, never ever indicated a desire for anything like that. Or, for that matter, anything.
> 
> ...



Ha ha, "spousal blurt collection". I love it, that's my new phrase of the day :grin2:
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Ikaika (Apr 23, 2012)

I want to know why everyone is dishing out fallacies associated with big members. 

The vagina is surrounded by a lot of elastic fibers and allows it to accommodate many sizes very well. 

As well in a LTR, she can become more or less accommodating to the situation over time.

Ok, so it's hard in the beginning, but it is just as painful for the guy as for her. 

And, just because some have size does not automatically make one "suck in the sack"

So I think in the long run, ditching someone with a large penis for someone less large has more to do with other issues than penis size.

Just my $0.02 worth of opinion.


----------



## imtamnew (May 13, 2013)

Hey,

You mentioned that you hit her cervix.

You do realize that there is no more room beyond it.

Imagine you have a car that is being parked in a garage. Does not matter how long the car is, only so much of your car can go inside it.
So if the X had a Looooooooooooooooooong car, so what. It still could not get inside the garage beyond the point that you yourself are using..

Sorry for the crude analogy but I hope you see sense and able to laugh it off.


----------



## alexm (Nov 29, 2008)

Truthseeker1 said:


> Agreed...why does she keep bringing it up and going into such gory details. Maybe I'm wrong but it seems crass and improper. I went out to dinner one night with a couple who just got back from their honeymoon. There were other people at the table and the subject came up about how they met, the online dating site they used, etc. All in all a normal conversation up until that point. Then the husband decides to go into "sharing mode" and tell us about all the women he slept with from that site before he met his wife. It wasn't just an off hand comment he went on for about 5 minutes or so talking about it. People just stared at him - the look of disgust on his new wifes face was obvious. Sharing like that can be crass and immature.


One of my brother in laws is like that, and dear god is it awkward when he starts in on those stories. He's a bit of a man-***** and immature for his age (nearly 40), yet he thinks it's okay to tell his sister (his SISTER!) about the chick who blew him in the parking lot, or the two girls he met online who came over for a threesome with him. I'm not even kidding.

He once brought over his then girlfriend for xmas dinner, and he started in with these stories. We were just mortified that he was going there with this poor woman sitting right next to him.

I think he honestly thinks people, including his girlfriends and his sister, are impressed by this. Ugh.


----------



## gouge_away (Apr 7, 2015)

alexm said:


> This really isn't a penis size thread, ladies and gents.
> 
> What this is, is OP now having a mental image of his wife with somebody else, who just happens to have a (too) big tool.
> 
> ...


I hear ya alexm...
I get the privilege of googling my stbxw's name and seeing all the nasty yahoo groups her and her ex boyfriend were into. Honestly, a part of me is very glad my name won't be associated with her's, I know its in the past, but its not my past, and its right there for the world to see.


----------



## gouge_away (Apr 7, 2015)

lifeistooshort said:


> Hey, don't be knocking us nerds. Chances are you work for one, remember?
> 
> We rule the world!!!!! Well except those that still live in mom's basement and b!tch on reddit about how women don't like "nice guys". :grin2:
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Owwwwee, "MOM THE INTERNET IS BULLYING ME AGAIN!"
she's gonna kick yer @ss


----------



## SecondTime'Round (Jan 15, 2015)

Truthseeker1 said:


> @GusPolinsk he even provided an example or two saying things like when I went out with this one girl we knew it was going nowhere and we were not going to have a serious reltionhip so we just gor to the sex If looks could kill his wife would be doing jail tme for murder. :banghead:


And how long did that marriage last? :surprise:


----------



## McDean (Jun 13, 2015)

Bad idea to share details, never ends well and we tend to make more of those things looking backward than they really are. A few things over the years have slipped out from both my wife and I, I had almost no reaction to hers but one of mine still bugs her to this day and I am regretful about it.


----------



## TAMissues (Aug 14, 2015)

Well I must say...the reaction from so many is impressive. I touched a nerve possibly.
I expected to see some silly comments and have. But read some sincere good ones which I appreciate.

I have thought about this a lot. And I realize it isn't so much the size thing as how I was told.
I didn't ask. She explained later she thought I was so confident about sex that the story wouldn't matter.
Because frankly we have amazing sex. Just a little better before this story started haunting me.

My take away is sharing details about your past is a dumb idea unless you and your partner are cool with it.
I am not, clearly.

I don't think I will check this anymore because I have a plan now and it has helped.
I just say to myself "I'm not wasting anymore brain time thinking about some moron she ditched"

It kind of makes it go away.

Lastly I want to be clear my thread was not intended to insult women in anyway whatsoever.
Some of the best advice came from women. 

Good luck with your marriages.


----------



## ThePheonix (Jan 3, 2013)

Good to see youre getting it together TA.


----------



## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

I don't see where you insulted us at all.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## oddball (Sep 5, 2012)

Well for what its worth I am smaller than everage and probably the smallest of my wifes sexual partners. Ive never cared that much. I posed nude for art classes as a student, and in my youth was somewhat of a nudist. I wont say Ive never had insecurities, but I have focussed on the fact that my wife married me, and that I am the father of our three children together. We are all created differently. At a point, I just decided I cant change my size - so I may as well work with what Ive got. 

Life to short to fret over what I cannot change. 

PS I must be the only guy on TAM that isnt 8 inches Lol!


----------



## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

oddball said:


> Well for what its worth I am smaller than everage and probably the smallest of my wifes sexual partners. Ive never cared that much. I posed nude for art classes as a student, and in my youth was somewhat of a nudist. I wont say Ive never had insecurities, but I have focussed on the fact that my wife married me, and that I am the father of our three children together. We are all created differently. At a point, I just decided I cant change my size - so I may as well work with what Ive got.
> 
> Life to short to fret over what I cannot change.
> 
> PS I must be the only guy on TAM that isnt 8 inches Lol!


There are a lot of guys on TAM who are sub 8"! Myself included. My average size has never once kept me from getting a partner off. So don't feel bad. Your wife bore your children and stayed with you for other reasons than c0ck size.

By the way, the worldwide average for a fully erect penis is 5.5" I believe.


----------



## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

bandit.45 said:


> There are a lot of guys on TAM who are sub 8"! Myself included. My average size has never once kept me from getting a partner off. So don't feel bad. Your wife bore your children and stayed with you for other reasons than c0ck size.
> 
> By the way, the worldwide average for a fully erect penis is 5.5" I believe.


*As long as it's healthy, aesthetically pleasing to both you and your spouse/partner, and gets the job done ~ what more could you ask for?*
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Holdingontoit (Mar 7, 2012)

If your partner is consenting to sex, then you are doing OK regardless of size.

And I agree it is generally a bad idea to share past sexual history unless you are sharing unfavorable reviews of former partners. Nothing good comes from complimenting your ex's physical attributes, technique, etc.

I am tiny. We have little to no sex. And my wife during MC blurted out "don't you think I miss the weekends spent in bed having sex with my bf? No, we can't go on vacation there, because I had lots of hot sex with a former bf there and I don't want to be reminded of the comparison to sex with you." 

Being married to her and being the father of her kids (yes, genetics check out) doesn't help dull the pain. Just don't go there.


----------



## I Don't Know (Oct 8, 2013)

Holdingontoit said:


> If your partner is consenting to sex, then you are doing OK regardless of size.
> 
> And I agree it is generally a bad idea to share past sexual history unless you are sharing unfavorable reviews of former partners. Nothing good comes from complimenting your ex's physical attributes, technique, etc.
> 
> ...


Why on earth are you married to this woman?


----------



## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

Holdingontoit said:


> If your partner is consenting to sex, then you are doing OK regardless of size.
> 
> And I agree it is generally a bad idea to share past sexual history unless you are sharing unfavorable reviews of former partners. Nothing good comes from complimenting your ex's physical attributes, technique, etc.
> 
> ...


*This is a woman who should have said "I do" to a vibrator! With an attitude like that, she absolutely shouldn't be married to anyone!*
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

I Don't Know said:


> Why on earth are you married to this woman?



Amen.


----------



## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

Holdingontoit said:


> If your partner is consenting to sex, then you are doing OK regardless of size.
> 
> And I agree it is generally a bad idea to share past sexual history unless you are sharing unfavorable reviews of former partners. Nothing good comes from complimenting your ex's physical attributes, technique, etc.
> 
> ...



Wow, what a sh!tty thing to say.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## ThePheonix (Jan 3, 2013)

If he stays married to a bit-ch like that, what can you say.


----------

