# It's time to file I think



## brokenbythis (Aug 21, 2011)

So after a year of back and forth, a false reconciliation (him still seeing his female "friends", lies and deceit), then me kicking him out again in July, I finally think its time to file and move ahead.

He'e never going to change. Never. I really don't think he is capable of a committed relationship. His own family is so messed up with multiple divorces I don't think he knows what a real relationship is. 

He's been making amends the last 6 wks or so, he tells me he would do this and that differently if we got back together, but I know he still sees other SINGLE female "friends" a lot, he doesn't share any of his life with me and he has made no concrete effort to commit to our relationship again, even if we continue to live apart for a while.

The lease is up on the house we shared,in 8 wks. I have been struggling to pay for it and I will be moving into an apartment. I will tell him this today when he comes over to pick up our son for his 2 day visitation. He also needs to take one of the dogs as the apartments I will be moving to only allow one dog.

I am so sad... it has really hit me this weekend. I don't know what I'm sadder about, my marriage ending and being alone, my son now coming from a broken home, or the fact that I married a unfaithful a-hole who never had any intention of treating this like a marriage and treating me like a wife.

I feel like I've given him plently of chances and time to make things better and now I feel like the year is coming to and end, my lease is up, and I need to file for divorce and move into an apartment I can easily afford, and get on with my life.

The memories of the hurts he has caused me over the past 12 years haunt my dreams. Its not right, I deserve someone who cares about me and loves me.

I've been so depressed all weekend. I have not cried for so long and this weekend I've been a total mess. Am I making the right decision?


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## oncehisangel (Oct 13, 2012)

huggs honey
You follow what feels right for you.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Sorry to hear it's come to this. I know it sounds hollow, but in time you will be ok, even better.

How do you know that he is still seeing other women? 

Has he told you that he's not doing this?


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## brokenbythis (Aug 21, 2011)

Ele: He doesn't tell me anything about what he does in his spare time. My son tells me. He takes our little boy out with his "friends". When I confront him he doesn't want to talk about it, or he denies it or he says what I've always heard with the other multiple single female friends he used to see in secret: "we're just friends".

How many posts on TAM are about just friends?


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Just wanted to give a hug.


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