# Husband and son



## indiecat (Sep 24, 2012)

We are separated, again. H uses son to confide in. Such as h bought me a bracelet
which I politely said was too expensive and I returned it, h told son I didn't appreciate his gift and son got on my back about how rude I was to his dad.

Also h. promised not to give our son his credit card anymore and then....he did. I was very upset and expressed that. That could have been left as it was. But h had to run and tell son that I objected to him giving him the card which led to son screaming at me while h stood by. That was the last straw and the reason we are not living together. Everytime h doesn't get his way he runs and tells our son, we have had mc and h has been told not to do this repeatedly.

I don't believe in badmouthing the other parent but to say they can't EAT because of me when it's a patent lie????? H told our son that they can't afford groceries because i didn't cave in and put even more money into the joint account on his demand. Meanwhile he has bought electronics and expensive designer clothes for our daughter out of that account. Son texted me in a rage saying his dad said they can't buy groceries until next week due to me. Son now says he is done with me, i am the worst mother ever etc. I asked son to go to counseling with me but he refuses and doesn't answer my calls now.


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## ThreeStrikes (Aug 11, 2012)

Can you provide a link to your original thread?


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## synthetic (Jan 5, 2012)

This is a very hard situation to be in. I really feel for you. My piece of sh1t dad inflicted this kind of abuse on me and my mother for years. He used me to make my mom feel guilty. Well he succeeded and my mom is now a wreck.

What your husband is doing is one of the worst types of abuse. I don't even know if there's a name for it. I'd rate it worse than physical violence. It eats at both you and your son from inside. Your son is not realizing it yet. How old is he? He'll become a wreck in his 30s himself.

I know it's hard but you need to cut contact with both for a while. Your son needs to hit rock bottom with his dad and start seeing you in a different light. He will eventually cut all ties with his father. That's guaranteed to happen in the future. If you remove yourself from this dysfunction, there's hope for you and your son.

Again, very sorry you have to go through this as a mother. It's gut wrenching.

Cut contact with both of them. It's toxic.


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## indiecat (Sep 24, 2012)

Has your mom
recovered at all?
I suffer from extreme anxiety now and feel like crawling home, against all my friends/doctors/counselors advice.
My son is 21.
I don't know how to provide the previous links.
I need to be strong for my 13 year old dd who is with me half time. H is now working on spoiling her as is my son so that she will want to stay with them only.


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