# Need someone to talk to...



## who123456 (Mar 2, 2013)

I am feeling really lonley right now, so I hope there is someone out there I can talk to.

My husband and I separated a couple of weeks ago, because I can't see a way forward for us with the problems we have.

I have slowly lost all interest in sex over the past few years, I have really tried, and we would do it occasionally, but not much. I don't really know why this is. I do love my husband but there were never really any sparks. I hoped that these would come with time, but what little sparks were there at the beginning have now ignited completely. He also wants a family, but I am 41 and now feel too old to contemplate having a baby. I really tried to get myself to want to have one but i just cant.

So based on this i decided we should separate, because I just cant see any solution to these problems. I don't know whether my hormones have changed and maybe thats why i dont want children, whether its my age, the fact we have no money, the fact that i am mid way through a course that will finally get me a good job...or all of that...

I don't know why i don't have a strong desire for sex anymore, i just feel like i cant be bothered, i've lost all interest, and i am not in the slightest bit interested in anyone else.

The trouble is, i DO love him, i miss him, i love his family, i am sad that all this is going to go, sad that i cant give him what he wants, because he does love me. I feel responsible for it all, but I really dont know what else i can do, other than separate.

I just needed to talk about it all. i have two jobs and study and a son to look after so i don't get much time, and i don't get a chance to talk it over with anyone.


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## Toffer (Jan 31, 2012)

Who,

Letting him go is probably the right thing to do.

Did you ever see a doctor to check out all your hormone levels? Are you on birth control?

I just saw another thread where a wife found out her potassium level was really low and when she addressed that, her sexual desires came roaring back.


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## doureallycare2 (Dec 10, 2012)

What steps other than separation have you taken to “see” your way forward?
What effort other than having sex?
The very first thing you should have done was seen a Dr. 
You can definitely be going through hormonal changes, not only affecting your sex urges but your emotional thinking also. 
Also IC, have you thought of going and talking with someone professionally? 
All these steps most certainly should have been done before the drastic step of separating. You basically are saying my marriage and my H is not worth me figuring out what is wrong with me. If you haven’t done either of these things and more, you’re giving up without even trying and you should feel responsible.


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## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

who123456 said:


> I am feeling really lonley right now, so I hope there is someone out there I can talk to.
> 
> My husband and I separated a couple of weeks ago, because I can't see a way forward for us with the problems we have.
> 
> ...


What was your childhood like?


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