# A very questionable marital notice my wife has in our kitchen



## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

She bought it a while back, it is one of a number of inspirational notices she has. 

It says 

"In marriage if you are wrong, admit it. 

If you are in the right say nothing."

To my way of thinking there's something deeply flawed with that sentiment.

What does everyone else think about it?


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## Mr. Nail (Apr 26, 2011)

When I got married, I thought I had found Ms. Right. I didn't realize her middle name was "Always".


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

MattMatt said:


> She bought it a while back, it is one of a number of inspirational notices she has.
> 
> It says
> 
> ...


There is one very important question that you need to answer.
Did she buy it for you or for herself?


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## 269370 (Dec 17, 2016)

MattMatt said:


> She bought it a while back, it is one of a number of inspirational notices she has.
> 
> It says
> 
> ...



Only if this applies to her. The reverse is true should the tables be turned.

The question is: did she buy this to ‘inspire’ you or herself? 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## 269370 (Dec 17, 2016)

Andy1001 said:


> There is one very important question that you need to answer.
> 
> Did she buy it for you or for herself?




Great minds think alike 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## minimalME (Jan 3, 2012)

Isn't the sentiment, 'don't be prideful'?


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## Ynot (Aug 26, 2014)

Andy1001 said:


> There is one very important question that you need to answer.
> Did she buy it for you or for herself?


My ex polluted our house with all those kind of sayings. After she left I realized that those were for her more than for me. I never needed to remind myself that family came first.


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## Marc878 (Aug 26, 2015)

Do as I say not as I do


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## SunnyT (Jun 22, 2011)

Maybe it's more innocent....like....

Admit your mistakes, and don't gloat. ????


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

I would think it's meant innocently too... like 'be accountable; demonstrate grace'.


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## Cooper (Apr 18, 2008)

I think it lost something in translation, it should read "If marriage wrong admit it and get the **** out. If marriage right don't complain about insignificant issues, shut up and enjoy it"


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## Dusk (Oct 29, 2018)

Seems reasonable to me? I would think it meant to take responsibility for your own stuff and don't rub it in when you're right about something.


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## zookeeper (Oct 2, 2012)

Useless crap priced just cheap enough to encourage an impulse buy, destined to be largely ignored until the day it is tossed in the trash.

How people act is what is merits attention, not the tchotchkes they buy. Most are manufactured by people who cannot even read them. How much meaning could they really have?


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## personofinterest (Apr 6, 2018)

I've seen a sign kind of like that before period I always took it to mean that when you are wrong be quick to apologize, and when you are right don't rub it in someone's face. I guess if we want to we can assign some sinister back door meaning to it, but I never really thought of it that way.


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## BarbedFenceRider (Mar 30, 2018)

"Ofcourse, I'm not going to say anything when I am right....I will be drinking my beer and relishing the moment."

hahahaha


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## Laurentium (May 21, 2017)

"right" and "in the right" are not exactly the same thing...


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## Ed3n (Sep 25, 2018)

My mother puts it another way "Is it more important to be right, or to be kind?" 

I know when I am right, but my husband insists that he is, that it is often easier to say nothing. This does not apply to everything, but when it doesn't matter who is right, I see no point in arguing about the issue. I took my mom's advice, and she was right. It is better to be kind. It also avoids a lot of pointless bickering, and hurt feelings.


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## David Darling (Oct 22, 2016)

Ed3n said:


> My mother puts it another way "Is it more important to be right, or to be kind?"
> 
> I know when I am right, but my husband insists that he is, that it is often easier to say nothing. This does not apply to everything, but when it doesn't matter who is right, I see no point in arguing about the issue. I took my mom's advice, and she was right. It is better to be kind. It also avoids a lot of pointless bickering, and hurt feelings.


Exactly.

As the hilarious Tim Dowling says in How to Be a Husband:

_"In the context of marriage, a moral victory is something you’ll invariably end up celebrating on your own. If you’re going to get on in married life — if you’re going to have sex ever — you’ve got to learn how to lose an argument. And to do that, you’ve got to learn how to be wrong."_


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## AliceA (Jul 29, 2010)

How do you know that you're right? Generally people aren't arguing over whether 2+2=4... 

It may be person 1's opinion that person 2 is lazy. From person 1's perspective, they would feel they are right.


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## personofinterest (Apr 6, 2018)

breeze said:


> How do you know that you're right? Generally people aren't arguing over whether 2+2=4...
> 
> It may be person 1's opinion that person 2 is lazy. From person 1's perspective, they would feel they are right.


This is a very good question. Lots of things are subjective. Example: Spouse A wants to spend time with parents on the holidays because they are aging and in very bad health. Spouse B doesn't want to go because it is a long trip and money is very tight, and besides, that aunt on one side is rude to her every single time.

Who is right? It's a tough one.

I wonder sometimes if it is more about being heard than being right.

If I am on an argument spiral, the quickest way to just gt me of the train is to HEAR me. Say "I hear you, you matter," even if it isn't those exact words.

Even on forums, if the person who MUST prove me wrong or argue with everything I say would just stop and say "Your matter and I hear you," 9.99999999 times out of 10, I'm finished. I back off. 

We often resist doing this due to pride.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

Mr. Nail said:


> When I got married, I thought I had found Ms. Right. I didn't realize her middle name was "Always".


*When I got married for the second time, I thought that all of my wrongs had been duly corrected!

Her middle initial was S.

Sadly, I later found out that it stood for "Skank!"*


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## Rubix Cubed (Feb 21, 2016)

personofinterest said:


> I've seen a sign kind of like that before period *I always took it to mean that when you are wrong be quick to apologize, and when you are right don't rub it in someone's face.* I guess if we want to we can assign some sinister back door meaning to it, but I never really thought of it that way.


 @MattMatt 
Your wife is an ASPY right? Maybe that is to remind her of the bolded above, because IIRC Not admitting fault or see the other side is one of the traits of an ASPY.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Rubix Cubed said:


> @MattMatt
> Your wife is an ASPY right? Maybe that is to remind her of the bolded above, because IIRC Not admitting fault or see the other side is one of the traits of an ASPY.


Tee and a hee and a hee hee hee!


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