# Husband in contact with x girlfriend



## simi (Mar 18, 2012)

My husband has been in contact with his x on Facebook.i know they have been emailing each other for a couple of months i have a problem with this because she was his first "love" so to say they dated for about 5 years or so and were close to getting married at a point. i was okay for a while with him emailing her because i believe that we all have rights to act on our emotions.i have his password for his Facebook account so i check who he's in contact with (he knows i do this).he deletes all emails that he receives and sends to this x of his.i read one and didn't like the way it was going so i confronted him he says there just talking about how things are now that he's married and has a kid i feel as though he's explaining himself to her or trying to emotional connect with her or with the past they shared. 
Whats hard is we talked about this when we first got married and he seemed to be over her in fact he hated her and now all these messages that i get glimpses of confuse me and anger me. she lives in the same city as us so I'm also worried he might even try to meet her one day..because he's done this before with another x of his. 
I don't understand how he thinks its okay for him to do this he says that how could he cheat on me when i have his password and all if he deletes his messages then he must have something to hide? I was pregnant when we got married he just left me when he first found out until his parents talked to him ..then he agreed to get married i loved him from the start but as the years went by i found out he was cheating on me while we were dating and i believe he also cheated on me after we were married while i was pregnant because i would find used condom packs in the car when i cleaned it.he explained that his friend often used his car but he was so protective of his car know one was allowed to drive it so it didn't make sense but i let it go. 
I don't know what to do I'm to scared of divorce because we have a child that i couldn't risk losing and i still have feelings for him i can't imagine living without him we share something sacred and special. i blame myself for somethings I'm going through a lot so I'm not myself most of the time..but he knows that I'm depressed he knows why and he knows I'm working my way out of it this depression is caused by his family which is a completely different story.

Has anyone been through something similar? i would appreciate advice on how to work through this all. there's a lot more to all this but i can type only so much.


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## Toffer (Jan 31, 2012)

Simi,
It's apparent from your post that you care for him more than he cares for you.

You need to work on your issues first before you can work on the issues that are weighing on your marriage.

What have you been doing about your depression? Get counseling and see your MD.

Once you have that under control, it will be time to work on your marriage.


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