# My Fantasy - Am I nuts?



## Sad_in_NY (Jun 23, 2010)

I know many of you are open minded and never judge, but in this case - judge away! 

The fantasy that bubbles to the surface in my the cauldron of my libido is having a Male-Female-Male threesome with my wife. 

I would never act on it, but I love the thought of my wife sexually ravenous and watching her curl the toes of another man like she does mine. 

Whenever we are talking dirty (which is rare) this comes out, playfully and she shoots it down. Says she has no interest in even the fantasy. 

I am nuts, right?


----------



## Amplexor (Feb 13, 2008)

It is not an uncommon fantasy but you are right to know your limits. Many spouses couldn't handle it if it were to come to fruition.


----------



## Sad_in_NY (Jun 23, 2010)

Amplexor said:


> It is not an uncommon fantasy but you are right to know your limits. Many spouses couldn't handle it if it were to come to fruition.



I am "the dating type" - I have been in a monogomous relationship for as long as I can remember. I have dated women that have slept with more partners than I have kissed. I have had the oppt'y to be in 2 threesomes/orgies and I have turned them down each time.


----------



## Rem1100 (Jul 7, 2010)

I agree with this as I have had the same fantasy, but as with you my wife quickly shoots it down and I also do not think that I would ever let it go any further then a fantasy. So I do not think your nuts as I have had the same fantasy and know many other men with the same, but I would think you are nuts if you acted on it.


----------



## Mal74 (Dec 24, 2009)

A few years back my H and I started talking about fantasies, and after a long period of banalities I finally told him, "I hope this doesn't freak you out but I really fantasize about having two guys at the same time." Since then we have talked about it a lot in our regular play but we both agreed that we would never take steps to make it happen in real life. Not that we're judgmental of other peoples' choices in that arena, but it's just not for us.

I have been surprised at the... uh, filthy stuff that is rattling around in my H's head with respect to this whole area of fantasy. That said, it certainly seems that this is extremely common.

As far as getting your wife to be comfortable with it, I'm not sure what to do. Perhaps continue to inquire as to her fantasies, and see what if any kinky directions that might take you in.


----------



## Sad_in_NY (Jun 23, 2010)

To be fair, if I had a woman tell me this 10 years ago I probably would have freaked. But, I have "grown". 

many times I have tried to discuss fantasies with my wife - never any luck. Oh well


----------



## Deejo (May 20, 2008)

Keep talking ... especially when naked.


----------



## Crypsys (Apr 22, 2010)

Gah, the thought of my wife with another guy does nothing for me at all. I'm one of those guys who the thought of another man with my wife brings up my fight response and I get my "caveman" aspect going.

So yeah, you are nuts. ;-) (j/k)

Different strokes for different folks. Ones man turn-on is another mans worst fear.


----------



## Affaircare (Jan 11, 2010)

I actually know of a person who's wife had an affair and he worked hard to get the affair to end. 

THEN he pushed and pushed and pushed her to do is fantasy of two men: him and any other guy of her choosing. She had done that fantasy once before and it ended the relationship, and for years she said no and would shoot it down. Finally she relented and picked a guy from work. 

She found the sex with him toe-curling and had an affair with the guy from work, and now the marriage is broken because she won't even CONSIDER trying again. 

Soooooo...it's a nice fantasy to daydream about, but for the love of God, don't go there.


----------



## AmorousWarrior (Jul 6, 2010)

My wife and I had talked about her with another woman or man. The thought of another woman turned her on more. We had a long conversation about it and decided that it was better left to be a fantasy. It's fun to talk about it while in bed, but the reality of it wasn't something that either of us wanted to deal with.


----------



## dsfg_lover_001 (Jul 4, 2010)

Well I understand how you feel.Three some is always a fantasy for men,you should tell your wife about what do you want for the sex life.Anyway i don`t think you are being nuts now,well thanks for sharing.


----------



## tamiwilli (Jul 9, 2010)

The fantasy that bubbles to the surface in my the cauldron of my libido is having a Male-Female-Male threesome with my wife. 

I would never act on it, but I love the thought of my wife sexually ravenous and watching her curl the toes of another man like she does mine. 



HEllo, I want to tell you that my husband is exactly this way. He always wants to watch me taking another man. We have had 4 different partners with us. One was a woman, the other 3-men. I can tell you that the woman was fun, but too much drama and I wanted to smack her. I did not like watching him with her, but I enjoyed her. The first guy was an idiot with no sexual prowess, but my husband freaked out and hid in the bathroom for 2 hours anyway. The second guy was WAY too dominant, and clashed with my husband. Now. Considering all of that, we still were interested in getting a man to join us. Here is where it gets kinda sticky. I had never been attracted to black men (or women) and had no interest in interracial sex. My husband(being the ass that he is) said he would never be with a woman who had sex with black men. Surprisingly, he brought over one of his black friends to join us. I was confused. I could not figure out why he was doing this if neither one of us wanted it. Well I decided that now this man was here and he was expecting a threesome and I was going to give it a whirl for nothing else than to avoid anyone losing face. Guess what happened? I bet you know. I really liked it. My husband really liked it. He came when I wasn't even touching him. Just from watching. I enjoyed the sensuousness that my husband does not give (he is very dominant, and bossy and a little rough, and I have no say in bed). So that was fun. Anyway, about 2 weeks later my husband needed to get something to me but could not deliver it himself so he sent our friend. Well. We hung out for hours talking and talking. I really felt a connection with him and I REALLY wanted to keep him. I wanted to jump him right then, but my husband and I agreed that is not allowed (both must be present). So I didn't, and the friend wanted to, too, but I told him that wasnt allowed and he respected that and did not touch me at all. SO. 2 days later we all gather in the bedroom. DISASTER. My husband did not like how nice I was to the guy and I ended up in tears and I have no idea what those 2 have talked about since, but the guy told me he would never talk to me again and also accused me of using him and many other things that were hurtful. I was SO hurt. My husband took it away the moment I REALLY enjoyed it. My friend will not talk to me, and I really liked him. We are about to get a divorce now because I was honest and told my husband I wanted the kind of intimacy that the third provided. It got complicated, quick. My husband has never used the N-word and he is not usually so offensive, but he now refers to me as "N"-lover and he says things like "once you go black, you never go back" to me. It was at his request, yet he tries to make me feel ashamed because I enjoyed a gift given to me. VERY UNCOOL. So to sum up. If you have a strong relationship (no trust issues, not going through a crisis), and both are MATURE, and you both are willing, it is soooo fun. You also must make clear what is ok and what is not beforehand to everyone involved, and you have to understand that sometimes people can't help liking another party and jealousy cannot be a factor. Anyway, you are not nuts.


----------



## CH (May 18, 2010)

For most men (90% or more) it's better left as a fantasy. Seeing someone actually inside your wife/gf seems like great idea in your head but when it's happening right in your face it could have disastrous results to your relationship.

Especially if she you can see that she's having a way better time with the other male then when the 2 of you are having sex alone, that alone can kill a man's ego big time.

Don't get me wrong, there are guys who can take it and love seeing that, but I'm just not one of those guys. I'll just live with the fantasy of MFM and MFF and leave it at that.


----------



## SandyM (Jan 15, 2009)

Sad in NY... too funny... 
You replied to my other post and I ran into this post while looking for another one... Our marriages have similarities!! My husband has this fantasy. We have never fully acted on it. We have gone as far as posting ads on a site for that type of stuff and replying to some of interest. As we talked, we got into topic of diseases, and possible pregnancy and that kind of killed it for him 
So the ad has been down but he will still use that while we are together. So I have told him if on a beach somewhere in Mexico and it would happen to come up that I would consider it... but by no means will he be able to do the same.


----------



## Sad_in_NY (Jun 23, 2010)

SandyM said:


> Sad in NY... too funny...
> You replied to my other post and I ran into this post while looking for another one... Our marriages have similarities!! My husband has this fantasy. We have never fully acted on it. We have gone as far as posting ads on a site for that type of stuff and replying to some of interest. As we talked, we got into topic of diseases, and possible pregnancy and that kind of killed it for him
> So the ad has been down but he will still use that while we are together. So I have told him if on a beach somewhere in Mexico and it would happen to come up that I would consider it... but by no means will he be able to do the same.


Sandy - my efforts/thoughts will never leave the bedroom. You guys are more adventurous than we are. I am wary of the pitfalls and I am not even talking about pregnancy or disease. I would just love to have my wife want that fantasy.


----------

