# Has a baby mad your relationship with MIL better or worse?



## KI0159 (Apr 19, 2011)

Deleted


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## badcompany (Aug 4, 2010)

I'd need more info to answer that question. Both my wife and I work. My parents don't help much and only her mom is still with us, so it makes it very hard for us having a kid.
Do both of you work?
If so and you have a baby, your MIL will likely become a regular and maybe more of a problem.
If you don't work and will be able to raise your baby and stay at home, sounds like minimal issues.


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## Pandakiss (Oct 29, 2010)

yes, it did. she didnt like me before...but we come from a ghetto family-so me and her were preggers at the same time.

she has 2 sons, and always wanted a girl, we both had girls, but because she had wanted a girl for 20/25 years prior, she couldnt just be happy she had one finally.

she had attitude about it for a while, then when i had the trips...all girls...she didnt speak to me on the day she found out {i was at her house} and stopped all contact for 2 years.

she is unhappy with her life, and anyone who has the slighest bit if happiness or fun, she is there. i think she does the best she can when we visit, so we keep her in the kids life.

but fortunatley, we were frequently with out a car, and didnt live near her, then she moved out of the city...

but yes vindictive, cruel, backstabbing, catch attitudes all the time over nothing. silent treatments {we can leave and go home}, wont visit me, we have a relationship all on her terms.

my husband knows how she is, and is happy to have her out of our lives. we have very different parenting..uh views..and thinks what she does is the best...ok by me, but if i say, i dont want my kids watching jay and silent bob strike back...then i dont want them watching jay and silent bob strike back.

i dont have to go into detail about how barbie is bad for young girls esteem...she would get mad, and either do it anyway..or if i tattle to husband, she will start a month long {or longer} silent treatment.

its only petty if you have a normal MIL, we are all not so fortunte.


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## FirstYearDown (Sep 15, 2011)

If your husband would take her side over yours, that is something that needs to be addressed before a baby comes. You should come first, he is not married to his mother.

Do not have children if you do not want them. My husband and I are not having children and even though people call us selfish, we are okay with that. We want to focus on each other and enjoy our freedom.

If she is already this nosey and interferring, it will only get worse once the baby comes.


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## Nikki1023 (Sep 24, 2011)

Mine got WORSE..then better.

She has 2 sons..had them young..age 19..then 21. I had my first at 21. My husband was 24 when she was born. 

Do you know what she said to my husband when she found out I was pregnant?? " Why, you are so young..you should be going out and enjoying your life! Im too young to be a grandma"

THEN after I had the baby..she was UP MY A$$. Putting her 2 cents in about EVERYTHING..wanting to come over every single day, she dosent drive..wanted him to go out and pick her up, then drop her off home. Totally interfered with any sort of family, bonding time we had.

He sided with her ALOT at the beginning, took him a good year and a half to see my view. She put so much stress on my marriage..between how we split the holidays..what we did for birthdays..and how mad she was that we didnt call her every single day to see how she was doing.

Now..5 years later..shes not so bad...but I dont really think its because she got better, I think its because my husband is out of the country. And she knows I really dont bother with her drama, so she kinda keeps in check since its just me.

SOOOOO BE CAREFUL. If I were you, Id try to discuss things with him BEFORE you get pregnant. Certain rules and expectations you have of him, and his family.


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