# How did you spice up your sex life?



## Curious_Guy (Aug 21, 2013)

Did you try new positions, new activities, and/or new places??
Do you exercise to look good too?

With work and taking care of kids, how does a married couple here on TAM keep the spark?


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## 40isthenew20 (Jul 12, 2012)

Getting in better shape will help all around in regards to your sex life. Stamina, flexibility,etc. Plus both of you will feel better about yourselves and want to be seen naked. 

New toys and some fantasy stuff will help, too.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*Staying in some semblance of shape seemed to help out the most, and by occasionally watching some of those steamy movies on pay-per-view cable.

XW never seemed to have any real interest in toys although she had some that she supposedly received as a gift from some prior BF before we ever met.*


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## NewHubs (Dec 23, 2012)

As mentioned staying in shape is KEY. It does make a world of difference when it comes to spicing up sex life.

Also...toys in the bedroom are good too. I bought my wife a vib and she loves it during sex.


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## JustAnotherMan (Jun 27, 2012)

Role Play...keeps things interesting


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

franks hot sauce. Its good on pizza wings and ............


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## UsernameHere (Sep 26, 2013)

Me and the misses had been pretty much vanilla sex for years.

We started off slowly with new things and it's helped us to enjoy sexy time much more:

Soft music playing and a nice massage for each
Slowing things down with the foreplay making things more sensual for both
introduce some simple toys (nothing too intimidating) to start with

Sit down and discuss likes, dislikes and common ground for things you both find exciting and try. I was amazed my rather conservative wife was willing to try cuffs, simple restraints and nipple clamps (she described them as very sensual and huge turn on)!!! :woohoo:


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## Writer (Aug 3, 2012)

Because of a condition that I have, daily exercise is important to me. It just makes me feel good and desirable at the same time.

We have been exploring roleplay. I do enjoy erotic literature, and, being authors, we both write erotic stories that only we have access to. We'll talk dirty to each other in bed. This started off slowly because I grew up in a repressive household where sex, our bodies, etc were taboo. I still feel slightly embarrassed when I voice what I'm thinking, but I do love his reaction to my thoughts.

We do use toys. In fact, we're thinking of ordering something on Adam and Eve.com in the coming weeks.

Finally, we are embarking on a light BDSM relationship. I'm the submissive. We do have a daughter, so we only do this side when she's not here or asleep. I don't want to explain to her why her father spanks her mother. lol.


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

chillymorn said:


> franks hot sauce. Its good on pizza wings and ............


I put that **** on everything!


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

Separation from a wife who couldn't be bothered with sex, followed by finding a gf who loves sex as much as I do. 

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## anotherguy (Dec 14, 2011)

UsernameHere said:


> ...I was amazed my rather conservative wife was willing to try cuffs, simple restraints and nipple clamps (she described them as very sensual and huge turn on)!!! :woohoo:


That is both hilarious and awesome. Good for you both.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

Curious_Guy said:


> Did you try new positions, new activities, and/or new places??
> Do you exercise to look good too?
> 
> With work and taking care of kids, how does a married couple here on TAM keep the spark?


We did all of that you mentioned above.......I feel when a couple wants to UP something between each other...they will TAKE THE TIME, they will find ways...tweak some schedules, a little better time management with kids at home...Most of us find the time for the things we crave, don't we?? 

*My List of Spicing* ...

*1.* Plan a Romantic vacation...get away...a country cottage with a hot tub on the porch..to an Ocean get away.....take a Nature walk together hand in hand... ..day trips getting off alone...visit an old "necking" site...

*2.* Take a shower together, lather each other up / bubble bath 

*3.* Buy a Sex Board game , this is one we have Discover Your Lover Board Game - ....so many ideas you can read off the cards, ideas you've never entertained on these cards..... even if they sit by your bedside... Play Strip Poker... Forget Monopoly, try this >> XXXopoly


*4.* Give body /oil / erotic massages.../foot massages -with mint lotion...

*5*. Read books to further ideas, positions, get ideas Here >> List of All Sex Positions  ..Read erotic stories to each other in bed...books like this > Frenzy: 60 Stories of Sudden Sex: 

*6.* Rent / buy some Sex Instructional videos ...nice list here > Loving Sex DVDs  

*7*. Buy some new lingerie to entice.. this is alot of fun, do a photo shoot...Women surprise him in heels , cook his breakfast -when the house is empty... welcome him home in some new lingerie, push him down on the bed & start taking his clothes off, start kissing his chest & working your way down as you unbotton him & unzip.

*8* FLIRT, tease and banter with each other... the only person in the world we have that freedom. If any words can be taken "dirty" -run with it... give each other those "eyes" of lust. These things keep us feeling young, passionate & very alive unto our lovers. 

*9.* Touching should be like a gravitational pull to your man, he wants his woman to do this freely and often.... if you sit next to him, run your hands down his stomach, a little below, if you feel an erection -take care of him, if you are out & about, tell him how you can't wait to get him all alone. You can have alot of fun in a darkened movie theater, act like teens again. 

*10.* Laugh together, make fun of each other even. Laughter is so very important, it lifts our spirits unto each other. 

*11*. Dance together... ..put on some love songs , hold each other close...or put on some "Pour some Sugar on Me' or "She shook me all night long" ...get a little wild... 

*12*. For the woman, I really enjoyed this Book >> 
I LOVED this one >>  Passionista: The Empowered Woman's Guide to Pleasuring a Man 

For the man >> She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman: 

*13. *. Try some Toys, can read reviews on  Adam & Eve Adult Store Try a "Sex Swing" (on that link)... some Sex Furniture here >> Liberator Sex Furniture

The possibilities are endless...


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## WalterWhite (Sep 14, 2012)

Ask wife to do Kegel exercises...give it a few weeks...


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## kimd (Oct 12, 2013)

By all means, role play each others fantasies. My man & I play in our bedroom and indulge each others desires. If our friends really knew what we do and say as we make love !!!!


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## GettingIt_2 (Apr 12, 2013)

My husband and I have taken it "outside the bedroom" a lot recently. I don't mean the actual sex act, but sexual touching, innuendo, flirty and dirty texts and emails, necking sessions, caresses, etc. We've been making it a point to carve out (to DEMAND) time for one another--even if the kids are clamoring and the chores aren't done. We find a place to be alone to talk. We feed the kids, then send them off so we can sit and have dinner together. We focus on one another to the exclusion of everything else several times a day. 

It might seem like a simple thing, but the difference in the bedroom is huge because our emotional and physical intimacy is kept pretty much in overdrive all day. 

New toys, new lubes, new fantasies, new locations for sex--all good, too, of course, but nothing, nothing beats feeling really, really into the guy (or gal) you're f*cking.


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## kimd (Oct 12, 2013)

That says it all GettingIt. Sounds like you are GettingIt often. Great !!!


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

Tobassco lube


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## Maneo (Dec 4, 2012)

Finger Paints. And they aren't just for fingers. Use an old sheet.


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## GettingIt_2 (Apr 12, 2013)

Maneo said:


> Finger Paints. And they aren't just for fingers. Use an old sheet.


Oh, this reminds me--my husband has always been turned on by tattoos in private places. I've thought about getting one, but never could pull the trigger. But I do occasionally let him take a sharpie and design one of his own where ever he wants. It is a huge turn on for both of his (it's so hard to lie still when he's slowly and intently working on my thigh, or hip bone, or ass) and he's quite a good artist. If I decided to get a tattoo, I'd let him design it.


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## NewHubs (Dec 23, 2012)

Shaggy said:


> Tobassco lube


:scratchhead: I like spicy but....


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## CuddleBug (Nov 26, 2012)

40isthenew20 said:


> Getting in better shape will help all around in regards to your sex life. Stamina, flexibility,etc. Plus both of you will feel better about yourselves and want to be seen naked.
> 
> New toys and some fantasy stuff will help, too.



This is the root cause for many people. They don't take care of themselves, insecure, then don't want sex much or talk about it either. Exactly! :smthumbup:


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

Shaggy said:


> Tobassco lube


*Hey Shaggy? May I borrow that bottle of McIlhenney's







just long enough to sprinkle a few drops on my XW's pointed little vibrating plastic toy?*


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## WalterWhite (Sep 14, 2012)

If you want the best sex and the biggest orgasms in your life, then the LAST thing you want to do is watch porn, and/or masterbate.

It is far better, and healthier, and sustainable to do this:

1. Improve cardio-vascular systems.
2. Improve muscles by weight training.
3. NEVER masterbate; it desensitizes.
4. NEVER view porn; it desensitizes.
5. Don't smoke.

Happy Fooking!


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## 40isthenew20 (Jul 12, 2012)

CuddleBug said:


> This is the root cause for many people. They don't take care of themselves, insecure, then don't want sex much or talk about it either. Exactly! :smthumbup:


Exercising and eating healthy helps produce more natural testosterone in men and women, enhancing their libido. It's a win-win and scientifically proven, too.


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## aeasty (Jun 5, 2013)

We do have a daughter, so we only do this side when she's not here or asleep. I don't want to explain to her why her father spanks her mother. lol.[/QUOTE]

Could be rather difficult lol or just keep the act going and say has been really naughty. 

I spiced up the sex life by getting one! The ex wasn't very interested in it and thus brought down the marriage and made other issues but now sex is great try as many new places as possible and even just going away on a sex vacation
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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