# confused.........



## beachgoer (Jun 30, 2012)

My wife and I have been separated for 8 months now. I am wanting and have offered to go to counseling. Every time she gets close to coming back she says "nothing will ever be the same" and tells me "i'm not looking at the big picture". And she says "part of me says yes and the other part no". 
How do i respond to these comments by her? 

Her lastest is " I don't know what to do or say anymore".


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## Married in VA (Jan 6, 2012)

Beach,
How do you respond? You agree to the break up. You agree to everything she is feeling and you tell her that you apologize for your part in the demise of your marriage and that divorce is the best option. She is done and wants out of your marriage otherwise SHE would be making some kind of effort. You don't have a marriage right now. It is a one sided effort and you shouldn't waste your time on someone who doesn't want you. Time to admit it's over and move on. Implement the 180 and get on with your life. Who knows, you just might get her back. Just saying...


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## lulubelle (Jun 28, 2012)

i agree. it sucks, and it's hard but doing a 180 may help. i know you want to do everything possible to work on things, if she's still at the "i don't know" stage, give her lots of space, if not total silence. let her miss you and decide if she wants put forth effort. in the mean time, work on and take care of yourself.


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