# I don't think either of us want to, but it seems inevitable



## AnonymousMan (Apr 9, 2011)

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## anx (Nov 30, 2010)

Get in MC. My MC story is in my profile. I'm not sure why you think that you can't live together during that.

You'll find more answers to what, why, and how there.



> maybe it will say some things I never can when we are in front of each other.


 Not being able to open up to your wife really is probably one of the biggest issues, and she probably feels the same way in reverse.


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## alphaomega (Nov 7, 2010)

Wow! Compared to all the other posts on this site, this one just seems so fixable to me.

MC will definitely help. The trick is finding one your both comfortable with. This may take some time, or you could just get lucky with your first one.

There are a lot of good books out there to read, to help you understand and interact with one another much better. If your both really commuted to trying to make this work, then you need to read them together.

His, needs, Her Needs.
The 5 Love Languages.
Fall in love, stay in love
For men only (for you to read)
For Women Only (for her to read)

Also, go check out
Www.affair care.com. (no spaces)
Marriage builders.com (no spaces)

This site, too of course.

When you talk, also take the personal out of it. Instead of.."you do this". Say..."I feel when you do this it....". This makes it about your feelings instead of a personal attack, which creates a lot of anxiety and fights. Also, when you feel like your or she is blowing your or her top, say "look, I really want to discuss this with you, but I'm/you're feeling angry, upset, etc......and you/ I just need to calm down a Bit. Can we bring this up later? Then go for a walk, drive, etc, until you are ready to discuss it again. But make sure you do talk about it later, or it will be like your sweeping the discussion under the rug.

Ok. Thats all I got for now.....good luck in this. Hope it works out well.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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