# thoughts on romantic movies as a disservice



## AggieL (Aug 8, 2020)

I have been thinking lately that romantic films especially older romantic comedies and Brit lit flicks have done a disservice to many people who are sexually immature. I don't say that as a dis. I am gently including myself. I was shocked and overwhelmed at the reality of sex when I started dating my now husband; the smells, the awkward positions, the need for communication, etc.. I now look at a romantic film that does not depict any sort of real sexual behavior and wonder as the couple kiss and embrace in the last shot of the film, "does she realize he may ask her to put her finger in his butt?" 

Any thoughts on how romantic films have effected your or your partner's developing views on sex?


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## Mr.Married (Feb 21, 2018)

AggieL said:


> "does she realize he may ask her to put her finger in his butt?"


So.....uuummmm....where’s the problem? 😜😜😜😜


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## Cletus (Apr 27, 2012)

I don't think they are any worse than, for instance, Sesame Street. I mean, did we really learn anything useful about same sex marriage from Bert and Ernie?

Holding films to task for not meeting a standard to which they were never subjected seems a little unnecessary.


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## Girl_power (Aug 11, 2018)

I think it’s the same as porn. Both set up unrealistic expectations.

I think that you need to experience yourself sexually to really understand what normal is first. At least understand yourself and your smells and what not.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

There's such a wide variety of what's called romance movies that what's romance is up to the individual. But none get into the sexual relations, really. 

Well, now, Deadpool One is a romance I like.

But some of the pure corny ones, too.

Then, you have how women and relationships are portrayed in 50s and 60s that has the rat pack members in them.

Dames, and all that. Now, those are cool. 

But the sex itself is left to the imagination.


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## Broken at 20 (Sep 25, 2012)

There was some great meme about this, but I can't for the life of me, find it. But I did find this one which has a similar message. 










But I think the major difference is that most guys know that they aren't going to find their favorite XXX star look-alike out there to date. I don't think most girls know that the perfect boyfriend and husband they have in their imagination doesn't exist.


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## Cletus (Apr 27, 2012)

Broken at 20 said:


> There was some great meme about this, but I can't for the life of me, find it. But I did find this one which has a similar message.
> 
> View attachment 70993
> 
> ...


To be fair, they do exist - in about the same ratio as the XXX porn star look alike (and perform alike) girlfriend.


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## Girl_power (Aug 11, 2018)

Broken at 20 said:


> There was some great meme about this, but I can't for the life of me, find it. But I did find this one which has a similar message.
> 
> View attachment 70993
> 
> ...


I disagree. A girl growing up with fairy tales and romance movies will have expectation of how daring should be. A boy growing up with porn will also have a wrong expectation of sex and women’s bodies.

As we get older and experience real life we know that’s not true and there is no harm.

I think we don’t remember but young kids are very impressionable.


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## AggieL (Aug 8, 2020)

Broken at 20 said:


> There was some great meme about this, but I can't for the life of me, find it. But I did find this one which has a similar message.
> 
> View attachment 70993
> 
> ...


Assuming that everyone knows perfection is not a thing in any aspect of life, then I would say that the men portrayed in romantic movies _do _exist to some extent. There are so many wonderful, chivalrous, funny, handsome men out there who want to love and respect their partner but they also want _real _sex not just an embrace, a passionate few minutes on top of her and some cuddling. That is the part that confounded me as a young person.


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## AggieL (Aug 8, 2020)

Ragnar Ragnasson said:


> There's such a wide variety of what's called romance movies that what's romance is up to the individual. But none get into the sexual relations, really.
> 
> Well, now, Deadpool One is a romance I like.
> 
> ...


I never imagined 3/4 of the sex that I currently participate in with my husband. It has been a long journey of acceptance in my mind and my body. I only imagined kissing and then a silent, passionate "cuming together" with him on top. I am not saying that's a good thing only that was my reality as a younger person.


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## Broken at 20 (Sep 25, 2012)

Girl_power said:


> I disagree. A girl growing up with fairy tales and romance movies will have expectation of how daring should be. A boy growing up with porn will also have a wrong expectation of sex and women’s bodies.
> 
> As we get older and experience real life we know that’s not true and there is no harm.
> 
> I think we don’t remember but young kids are very impressionable.


I won't argue that young kids are impressionable. But young kids SHOULD NOT be watching porn. Granted, once puberty starts, porn becomes a necessity for some. Despite the age requirement. 



AggieL said:


> Assuming that everyone knows perfection is not a thing in any aspect of life, then* I would say that the men portrayed in romantic movies do exist to some extent. There are so many wonderful, chivalrous, funny, handsome men out there *who want to love and respect their partner but they also want _real _sex not just an embrace, a passionate few minutes on top of her and some cuddling. That is the part that confounded me as a young person.


I don't think there are as many as you want to believe there are, and you're kind of proving my initial point right here.

You brought up handsome men. Because looks are subjective, let's pick categories that can be measured and compare the US male population to it: height and weight. According to google, 47% of men are taller than 5'10" (a good height), and in the US, almost 50% of the US male population is overweight, with over 10% being obese. That means of the US population, less than half of the population is a height that I would guess most women would prefer (or taller), and of that population, we got about a 50% chance of them being overweight. That narrows the population down to 25%

If we just look at the romantic comedies, it's not any better. I googled top 10 romantic comedies, then wikipedia for the plot for the top 3 (because I was not doing this for 10). And the first 3 that came up, yeah the guy was in shape/tall etc., but also it was mentioned he was upper middle class, or better. So income. 
Less than 10% of the US earn $100,000 or more. 
Only 12.5% of the US earn more than 75,000.


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## minimalME (Jan 3, 2012)

😳



Broken at 20 said:


> Granted, once puberty starts, *porn becomes a necessity* for some. Despite the age requirement.


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## Girl_power (Aug 11, 2018)

Most kids have smart phones and/or a computer/iPads. You better bet your butt they are looking up porn.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

Girl_power said:


> Most kids have smart phones and/or a computer/iPads. You better bet your butt they are looking up porn.



Right or wrong, good or bad; pick your stance but that's a true statement.


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## minimalME (Jan 3, 2012)

They may be looking at it, but they certainly don’t need it.

Pornography is not a necessity. 🙄


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## Married_in_michigan (Apr 9, 2014)

I agree that movies and other media form unrealistic expectations of relationships and sex


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

minimalME said:


> They may be looking at it, but they certainly don’t need it.
> 
> Pornography is not a necessity. 🙄


And I agree with that, for sure. It's too easy to find, and that's one of the barriers from pre-internet. 

Hustler was available a hundred years ago in my youth, but if it wasn't the stack handed down from brothers or friends an effort had to be made. 

Even then it was limited, and as the content wasn't wild with sex, just pics, (real paper!) the novelty passed.


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

In my opinion most romantic movies completely gloss over the fact that for a woman getting married that she might as well be adopting an overgrown child that is completely incapable of cleaning up after himself and is looking for younger someone that can do everything for him that his mom did while growing up but without all the nagging to tuck in his shirt and wash his hands after petting the cat.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

badsanta said:


> In my opinion most romantic movies completely gloss over the fact that for a woman getting married that she might as well be adopting an overgrown child that is completely incapable of cleaning up after himself and is looking for younger someone that can do everything for him that his mom did while growing up but without all the nagging to tuck in his shirt and wash his hands after petting the cat.



Surely you jest. 

That may be the case for some men and women entering Ms and maybe more so in todays society but not all, in broad summary.


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## Broken at 20 (Sep 25, 2012)

Girl_power said:


> Most kids have smart phones and/or a computer/iPads. You better bet your butt they are looking up porn.


I would argue it's smarter to give the kids an i-phone to look at porn with than hope they don't do it on the family PC. My phone has never been home to more viruses than a Chinese wet market. 

Secondly, parents can put restrictions on the phones, and routers or modems, etc, to restrict what the kids can watch. If they're too lazy or don't care to learn how, that's their choice. The tools are there. 


minimalME said:


> They may be looking at it, but they certainly don’t need it.
> 
> Pornography is not a necessity. 🙄


I misspoke here. Porn is definitely not a necessity. Something I learned at that age when I went on a mission trip for 10 days with no internet. But it does enhance the experience. 

Should've said masturbation instead.


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## WandaJ (Aug 5, 2014)

the truth is these movies are fairy tales for adults. Feel good movies. Movies, where you can relax, and enjoy, take a break from your everyday life. The adult person knows this is not true, this is just Hollywood story to enjoy. Steal couple of hours from your life.


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## Cletus (Apr 27, 2012)

WandaJ said:


> the truth is these movies are fairy tales for adults. Feel good movies. Movies, where you can relax, and enjoy, take a break from your everyday life. The adult person knows this is not true, this is just Hollywood story to enjoy. Steal couple of hours from your life.


Precisely. Willing suspension of disbelief and a couple hours of escapism is good for the brain.

Might as well not create LOTR because Hobbits don't exist. But then, lots of women would have never had the opportunity to swoon over Viggo.


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## Cletus (Apr 27, 2012)

minimalME said:


> They may be looking at it, but they certainly don’t need it.
> 
> Pornography is not a necessity. 🙄


So help me out here.

The list of things we absolutely need is very short indeed. Why does porn continue to get the "we don't need it" treatment when that statement applies to literally almost everything we do on a daily basis - like watch romance movies?


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## minimalME (Jan 3, 2012)

😂 😂 😂 

I agree with you! It is a short list.

You'll not find me saying romance movies are a need. Or watching anything on TV, for that matter. Or the TV.

It's nice to have modern things, and I'm very thankful for my electronics, air conditioning, modern medicine, etc.

But you're right, the majority of what fills our lives are not _needs_.

I do consider sex a basic human need - but not pornography.



Cletus said:


> So help me out here.
> 
> *The list of things we absolutely need is very short indeed.* Why does porn continue to get the "we don't need it" treatment when that statement applies to literally almost everything we do on a daily basis - like watch romance movies?


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## Girl_power (Aug 11, 2018)

@AggieL do you or did you ever watch porn when you were younger?


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## Cletus (Apr 27, 2012)

minimalME said:


> 😂 😂 😂
> 
> I agree with you! It is a short list.
> 
> ...


Ok. I also see that you were responding to a post saying that porn was a "necessity for some".

Forgive me if I am over-interpreting, but I read your comment as saying more than a tautological "that's not strictly true" - and that may only be my interpretation. But I read it as implying that it was in some way inferior to, well, I'm not sure what except not using porn. Hence the question. Do we slap someone on the back for making it through a Florida summer without air conditioning, simply because it isn't a need? 

So if sex is a basic human need, and someone cannot fulfill that need with another person (or even if they can - perhaps that's the point of my question) - why not the modern convenient version? I was probably 17 before I realized that women didn't come with a staple through their mid-section .


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## minimalME (Jan 3, 2012)

In the context of this thread, I was responding to Broken at 20's assertion that once children hit puberty, they need pornography. 

He corrected that statement. 🙂

The rest of this is all you. 



Cletus said:


> Ok. I also see that you were responding to a post saying that porn was a "necessity for some".
> 
> Forgive me if I am over-interpreting, but I read your comment as saying more than a tautological "that's not strictly true" - and that may only be my interpretation. But I read it as implying that it was in some way inferior to, well, I'm not sure what except not using porn. Hence the question. Do we slap someone on the back for making it through a Florida summer without air conditioning, simply because it isn't a need?
> 
> So if sex is a basic human need, and someone cannot fulfill that need with another person (or even if they can - perhaps that's the point of my question) - why not the modern convenient version? I was probably 17 before I realized that women didn't come with a staple through their mid-section .


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## LisaDiane (Jul 22, 2019)

AggieL said:


> Assuming that everyone knows perfection is not a thing in any aspect of life, then I would say that the men portrayed in romantic movies _do _exist to some extent. There are so many wonderful, chivalrous, funny, handsome men out there who want to love and respect their partner but *they also want real sex not just an embrace, a passionate few minutes on top of her and some cuddling. *That is the part that confounded me as a young person.


Am I the only one who was thrilled that there was more to sex than what I saw in movies as a girl...?


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## Mr. Nail (Apr 26, 2011)

AggieL said:


> Assuming that everyone knows perfection is not a thing in any aspect of life, then I would say that the men portrayed in romantic movies _do _exist to some extent. There are so many wonderful, chivalrous, funny, handsome men out there who want to love and respect their partner but they also want _real _sex not just an embrace, a passionate few minutes on top of her and some cuddling. That is the part that confounded me as a young person.


The best part about romance men is that they are mercenaries with millions of dollars, and quite a few of them are undead or shapeshifters. Not only is the "perfection" unusual, it's downright unreal. but hey if I was a billionaire shapeshifter, my wife would just read about taller billionaire shapeshifters.


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## Mr. Nail (Apr 26, 2011)

WandaJ said:


> Steal couple of hours from your life


Or every minute you are not at work or driving. I could handle it at a weekly hallmark flick. But it's full time escape now. The only good news is she doesn't much care what I cook as long as it doesn't cut into escape time.


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## Broken at 20 (Sep 25, 2012)

LisaDiane said:


> Am I the only one who was thrilled that there was more to sex than what I saw in movies as a girl...?


As a guy....um, no? Do you mean like the talking and feelings aspect of it? Or all the crap that happens afterwards? I thought that was the price of admission. Sometimes the massage, or foreplay, is enjoyable. Maybe the cuddling? 
Like, what's the 'more' you're referring to? Breakfast? 



Mr. Nail said:


> The best part about romance men is that they are mercenaries with millions of dollars, and quite a few of them are undead or shapeshifters. Not only is the "perfection" unusual, it's downright unreal. but hey if I was a billionaire shapeshifter, my wife would just read about taller billionaire shapeshifters.


The lack of grammar in the first sentence hurts me. 
And if I were a guessing man...I'd be a shape-shifter? Because I shift to be whatever I think the girl wants? 

Or is this a reference to the husband store?


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

Ragnar Ragnasson said:


> Surely you jest.
> 
> That may be the case for some men and women entering Ms and maybe more so in todays society but not all, in broad summary.


As for men being overgrown children that are adopted by a wife...

...I assume then you were the last person to wash your pillow cases and replace your toothbrush?


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## LisaDiane (Jul 22, 2019)

Broken at 20 said:


> As a guy....um, no? Do you mean like the talking and feelings aspect of it? Or all the crap that happens afterwards? I thought that was the price of admission. Sometimes the massage, or foreplay, is enjoyable. Maybe the cuddling?
> Like, what's the 'more' you're referring to? Breakfast?


Are you really asking me...? Lol!!
To answer your question, NO, not the talking and feelings aspect of it, I mean the physical aspect of it -- I meant that I was thrilled that there was more to do sexually than what was in the movies, and I would have been disappointed if sex was as boring as those movies showed.


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## Prodigal (Feb 5, 2011)

Mr. Nail said:


> he only good news is she doesn't much care what I cook as long as it doesn't cut into escape time.


Do you know her motivation for escaping? Inquiring minds would like to know.

Anyone who watches the crap that passes for entertainment on The Hallmark Channel should be jettisoned to a distant galaxy ...


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

badsanta said:


> As for men being overgrown children that are adopted by a wife...
> 
> ...I assume then you were the last person to wash your pillow cases and replace your toothbrush?



No, you got me on the washing bed items. 

But, saving grace, for our whole M she washes the sheets and pillow cases, and I remake the whole bed and put the pillowcases on, make the bed. 

I get my own laundry done. Buy my own clothes, get my own personal care items ordered in.

But she does buy the tooth brushes.


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## Mr. Nail (Apr 26, 2011)

Prodigal said:


> Do you know her motivation for escaping? Inquiring minds would like to know. -snip-


It's either addiction or insomnia.
I guess it could be the stress of holding down an emotional? affair.
There is always that very same thought in my mind. The what is so bad that I'm doing that she needs full time escape. I guess I don't know. If a man is using porn is it because he needs to escape his wife or is he addicted?


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## WhiskeyVictor (Sep 13, 2016)

Movies are purely for entertainment. Either way, sex is not one size fits all so you won't get an accurate depiction of a typical romp session. They probably assume that people watching sex on TV engage in sexual activity so there's no need to be as graphic and rated as such.


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

Ragnar Ragnasson said:


> No, you got me on the washing bed items.
> 
> But, saving grace, for our whole M she washes the sheets and pillow cases, and I remake the whole bed and put the pillowcases on, make the bed.
> 
> ...


You see in romantic movies it never shows the woman pulling the sheets off of the bed and washing them (including the husband's pillow cases). Nor does it show her looking at your tooth brush and thinking, "OMG he needs a new one because no way would I put that in my mouth.... oh ewwww he kisses me after brushing with that!"

Let me guess a few more things that only a mother would do for her son, and subsequently his wife has to do:

Purchase/replace your bathroom towels as needed
Schedule your doctor/dentist appointments
Write/mail thank you cards on your behalf when needed
Remind you when you need a haircut 
Keep up with everyone's birthdays in the family and remind you of upcoming ones as needed
Help you wrap any gifts from you to your friends and family (and sternly insist that it is not OK for you to give unwrapped gifts in a Dollar General plastic bag with the receipt still inside)
Clean up the muddy footprints you track in the house or car
so on and so on....

This is not meant to be a sexist post by any means, but more of a thank you to my mom for everything she did for me but that it would not be until she passed away that I noticed and began to appreciate them all. 

Sincerely, 
Badsanta
[*]


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

badsanta said:


> You see in romantic movies it never shows the woman pulling the sheets off of the bed and washing them (including the husband's pillow cases). Nor does it show her looking at your tooth brush and thinking, "OMG he needs a new one because no way would I put that in my mouth.... oh ewwww he kisses me after brushing with that!"
> 
> Let me guess a few more things that only a mother would do for her son, and subsequently his wife has to do:
> 
> ...


And a much thanks to my dear Mom, (who's passed, a few years ago).

She did most of those things, and Grandmother. 

Except for writing thank you cards and wrapping presents, I do all the rest as of course she does too, and we're all guilty of the footprints 🙂 !

But your meaning isn't lost my friend. And too much, it is true.


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## Prodigal (Feb 5, 2011)

Mr. Nail said:


> The what is so bad that I'm doing that she needs full time escape. I guess I don't know.


Why not ask? Would a direct question illicit a direct response?


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## Broken at 20 (Sep 25, 2012)

LisaDiane said:


> Are you really asking me...? Lol!!
> To answer your question, NO, not the talking and feelings aspect of it, I mean the physical aspect of it -- I meant that I was thrilled that there was more to do sexually than what was in the movies, and I would have been disappointed if sex was as boring as those movies showed.


I would assume that's because they can't put lengthy documentaries about the human reproductive system into movies beyond the like, 2-4 minute, vanilla sequences (complete guess). That would make the movie too long. And the movie ratings board in....probably every country would categorize that movie as XXX. 

Guess I have the benefit of growing up in the internet age and knowing there is a vast ocean of...activities beyond that which movies are willing to demonstrate. 



badsanta said:


> Let me guess a few more things that only a mother would do for her son, and subsequently his wife has to do:
> 
> Purchase/replace your bathroom towels as needed
> Schedule your doctor/dentist appointments
> ...


So..I know I'm probably not a good role model...for....probably anyone or anything. But are you seriously telling me you had trouble doing all the above prior to marriage or a serious relationship? 
Is this typical of the male leads in romantic comedies? Like, how does a guy like that function? And have a job with income? 
Maybe that's why I'm not getting any action on Tinder. I'm too put together, and don't have enough going wrong for me that needs fixing like in those movies. 


Speaking of those movies, are we just completely bypassing my post on the first page? 
Where I use statistics to show there can't being a lot of handsome men wanting to get married? Thereby showing that guys typically portrayed in the romantic comedies are a very small percentage? 
Or that most of the guys in these movies are at least somehow upper middle class, and that's an even worse statistic? 

I mean, if we are, totally fine with it. I'm just salty that I looked up all those statistics and plot points of stupid movies to make a point that is completely ignored.


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## Mr. Nail (Apr 26, 2011)

Prodigal said:


> Why not ask? *Would a direct question illicit a direct response?*


You asked the right question. No a direct question will illicit no answer, "I don't know" answer. or upset at being nagged (distracted from escape reading).


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## AggieL (Aug 8, 2020)

Broken at 20 said:


> I would assume that's because they can't put lengthy documentaries about the human reproductive system into movies beyond the like, 2-4 minute, vanilla sequences (complete guess). That would make the movie too long. And the movie ratings board in....probably every country would categorize that movie as XXX.
> 
> Guess I have the benefit of growing up in the internet age and knowing there is a vast ocean of...activities beyond that which movies are willing to demonstrate.
> 
> ...


I appreciate your efforts. I almost skipped the word "handsome" but kept it because it is subjective. There are many men I have found attractive who are not movie star attractive. Still, your point about money and looks are well stated. I am way more attracted to humor and kindness and confidence/bravery than looks or money. I made an assumption that I am not alone. I suppose I am saying that I am attracted to the sidekick men in these movies rather than the lead and that's not really true but that's because of the way they are written. However, I do see your point. 

My point, in my original post, was to find out if others felt that their sexual development was adversely affected by too many romantic notions received through film and not enough real life, real sex education. I don't watch porn. There was a period of time when I had access to loads of Playboy magazines. I was 8 or 9 and that did make an impact. Unfortunately, I considered those titillating times as shameful as opposed to the romantic films which I saw as noble and good. Also, those magazines did not really portray sex but just nudity and sexiness.


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

Well, my generation could go see Deep Throat and Last tango in Paris at the movies, so I guess it was a bit different. 

I think the bigger problem is the mass proliferation of porn, which makes a lot of men feel entitled to brutal sex most women are not going to enjoy and puts a lot of naive young women thinking that's expected.


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## GC1234 (Apr 15, 2020)

All movies, cartoons, etc. SHOULD be solely for entertainment purposes, but also have political agenda's strewn into them...think about it. Look at the messages in Coco, good movie, but a kid who knows better and disobeys parents and family. Not sure what messages they're trying to send, but they're not good. The little mermaid: change/give up who you are to get the prince. Even romance movies don't show women how they should "really be when dating"...we all know dating is a game with specific things you have to do in order to land the man or woman. That's my rant of the day


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## Personal (Jan 16, 2014)

GC1234 said:


> Even romance movies don't show women how they should "really be when dating"...we all know dating is a game with specific things you have to do in order to land the man or woman.


No we don't all know dating is a game with specific things one has to do in order to land the man or woman.

I've been married twice and am still married in the second instance, and had another longer term sexual relationship (in that one she also asked me to marry her), plus other sexual relationships. Yet I've never had to do any specific things to land any women, so please do enlighten me?


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## GC1234 (Apr 15, 2020)

Personal said:


> No we don't all know dating is a game with specific things one has to do in order to land the man or woman.
> 
> I've been married twice and am still married in the second instance, and had another longer term sexual relationship (in that one she also asked me to marry her), plus other sexual relationships. Yet I've never had to do any specific things to land any women, so please do enlighten me?


Ordinarily, I'd be happy to share my thoughts on the matter, but with comments like "so please do enlighten me", I sense a little something off. So I'll choose not to and move forward. But do enjoy your night!


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## Personal (Jan 16, 2014)

GC1234 said:


> Ordinarily, I'd be happy to share my thoughts on the matter, but with comments like "so please do enlighten me", I sense a little something off. So I'll choose not to and move forward. But do enjoy your night!


Being completely clueless on this I'd really like to know, since I have never known that there are any specific things that ever need to be done?

Is it something like having sex within 2 hours of first meeting at party, like what happened with my ex-wife and I when we first met?

Or is it like when I had sex with some woman in a nightclub one night. Then while riding public transport home later that night another woman gave me her phone number and asked me to call her, so I had sex with her the following day?

Or maybe it's like when my now wife asked me out for our first date, because she heard another woman at work was just about to ask me out?

Is it about having sex early into dating?

Please help me out.


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

AggieL said:


> Assuming that everyone knows perfection is not a thing in any aspect of life, then I would say that the men portrayed in romantic movies _do _exist to some extent. There are so many wonderful, chivalrous, funny, handsome men out there who want to love and respect their partner but they also want _real _sex not just an embrace, a passionate few minutes on top of her and some cuddling. That is the part that confounded me as a young person.


One of the first sex scenes I saw as a youngster, was in Purple Rain. 

For me, typical romance movies focus less on sex... and more on holding boom-boxes up to the window. I very recently revisited Before Sunrise (Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy). Oh I love walking around a strange city with my husband and just chatting away, being together... and the reality of married life while I watched the movie, was him unloading the dish-washer and reminding me that I'm messing up the carving knives by putting them in the machine instead of hand-washing them. I couldn't help but laugh (while acknowledging what he was saying), blew him a kiss, and which led to silly running commentary between us about every day life and the movie I was watching.


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

Which is also why I really love this scene in one of my fave movies, High Fidelity:


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

And I stumbled upon Barbarella around aged 15. That type of viewing likely intrigued me more than romance movies in terms of considering sexuality.

So I can't say that romance movies have done me a disservice in any way. As others have shared, we allow ourselves to be suspended by the story and characters at the time... just like reading books, watching theater etc.


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