# Kids who are about the same age as girlfriend



## Justanothermile (Aug 24, 2013)

I am 40 years old and have three kids ages 21, 19, and 13 and have been seeing a woman who is 24. We really enjoy each others company and are very happy together. Last week something happened and she pulled back. After talking to her and hearing what was concerning her it turns out that she is very concerned with the ages of my kids and the fact that they are three years younger than her. I talked to my kids and all three of them are just fine with dad dating her, in fact they are happy because she makes me happy. I passed this info on hoping to calm her nerves and she was very happy to hear this but said that she couldn't explain it but still felt awkward. According to her this is the only hang up. Is there anything that I can do to help her with this feeling or is this something that just has to be deallt with one day at a time? 

Looking for advice.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

One day at a time. I can understand her concern.


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## Maneo (Dec 4, 2012)

What happened when she pulled back? What was the thing that happened?


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## ILoveMyWife! (Sep 5, 2013)

Why date someone so young? Chances of anything going anywhere are very slim. I understand it might be "fun" then dont tell your kids about it. I would just take it slow and see what comes of it.


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## Sanity (Mar 7, 2011)

The only reason a 24 year old is dating a 40 year old is for financial stability or she's temporarily bored with her age bracket. Do yourself a favor and don't get her pregnant and enjoy the ride because that's all your getting.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

Sanity said:


> The only reason a 24 year old is dating a 40 year old is for financial stability or she's temporarily bored with her age bracket. Do yourself a favor and don't get her pregnant and enjoy the ride because that's all your getting.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Not all of them but most.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## soulseer (Jul 26, 2013)

wow I am 37 ...and the thought of dating a 21 year old is disturbing. I could date a 30year old without feeling like a creep.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

soulseer said:


> wow I am 37 ...and the thought of dating a 21 year old is disturbing. I could date a 30year old without feeling like a creep.


How is this helpful?


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## Coffee Amore (Dec 15, 2011)

lenzi said:


> How is this helpful?


She or he is sharing an opinion of what he/she would do in the same situation. That's what so many posters do on TAM.


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## clipclop2 (Aug 16, 2013)

It is demonstrating a norm. Why is the guy dating her? Would he want a 40 yr old dating one of his kids?

I don't know her circumstances. I do know the kids wo.t be the only thing that makes her uncomfortable as time fgoes on. 40-year old wives will also make her (sometimes deliberately) uncomfortable. Some of your 40-year old friends you on the back because she pulled such a young chick. others will treat her like a w**** and make passes at her ... And any girlfriends she brings around.

I know this from my own experience.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ASummersDay (Mar 4, 2013)

I think she is right to be concerned about the age gap. Twenty years is nothing to sneeze at. I am left to wonder why such an age difference would not seem to concern you in the slightest.


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## Engagedandconfused85 (Sep 7, 2013)

It is extremely rare for a relationship between a 24 year old and a 40 year old to work out. You are in two different stages of your life.

What happens when, in a couple of years, she wants to have kids and you realize you don't want to have an infant around at 45?

What happens when you're looking to retire in Boca and she still has 20 years at her job?

What happens when you're 80 and in a wheelchair, and she is still wanting to go out dancing because she's only 63?

How can you have a real conversation with a woman who is barely out of college while you've raised three children and seen so much more of life? 

I just don't see how it will work on a level other than physical.


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## clipclop2 (Aug 16, 2013)

If a man is immature enough, that last thing isn't an issue.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Engagedandconfused85 (Sep 7, 2013)

clipclop2 said:


> It is demonstrating a norm. Why is the guy dating her? Would he want a 40 yr old dating one of his kids?
> 
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I agree with this. I don't know if his 21 year old or 19 year old is a daughter, but the OP should think about how he would feel if a man nearly old enough to be his daughter's father starting trying to date her.

Gross. Date someone your own age, OP.


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## Cosmos (May 4, 2012)

I don't believe age is necessarily a problem in relationships, but I do believe that the percentage difference and life experience can be. It could be that realizing that she's so close in age to your children has brought this home to her and caused her to rethink the wisdom of her relationship with you.


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## clipclop2 (Aug 16, 2013)

if one of those kids a son his girlfriend might find herself attracted and with a little bit of booze or the right conditions we all know how it can go wrong .

I also know this from experience . we didn't go that far but there was a moment of high tension . The son happened to be very handsome just like his father .
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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