# introducing people into our 'bed'



## southernlove (Apr 8, 2013)

Hi~ This is very odd for me to be considering.. I have a wonderful man in my life and our 'bed' time is always nothing short of fabulous. We are extremely sexual and spontaneous. The list of our never dos is very short. So all in all we keep each other very happy and worn out ~ haha. Well, this last year he has told me about his favorite porn- they are like homemade ones about a husband who shares his wife with another man, not in a gay way~ some times its soft play other times they share- anyway, he states all the time that he would like to do this. He wants to see me with another man? I'm thinking about it, but worry about taking it out of a fantasy and them having him think I truly am the '****' we act out~ So now with all the talk I cant help but think about being fair and doing either a couple thing, or M4WM or W4WM - We have been together for a little over 4 years and are engaged. And I'm okay with the 'idea' of it, but don't know how it effects couples. Or how to start something discreet like that- IF ITS EVEN LEGAL!! I have talked with him about it, and he seems to be taken by this and it could be fun. But I'm nervous where this will put 'US' as a couple. Will there be talk about things later like grudges? Can it be something that we share together and not travel to cheating on the side? Has anyone gone through this and has it been good? I have soo many questions~ and don't know who to ask really. I would do anything to keep my man happy, & he would for me as well I believe. I just don't know HOW serious he is & I don't want to cross lines I can't undo. Basically is it worth one night?


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## deejov (Sep 24, 2011)

I don't have a lot of personal experience with this, other than when I wasn't married, I was interested in exploring it. With a partner that I trusted. We never went through with any of it, because we both decided it would change our relationship. 

My personal opinion on this... a good friend that I trust, know well, and it's a temporary relationship, yeah I might consider it. 

Someone I was married to, or intended to stay with? No.
My personal view only.

Some people are able to do this, but you don't know until you do it if you can live with it, or if your relationship can survive it. And it only takes ONE of you to not accept it for the whole relationship to die. 

It's a risk. Make it an informed one. Some cities have clubs, groups, you can visit with. By posting here in the first place there is probably a lot of doubt. So seek out more information. Give yourself a lot of time to make sure you aren't being talked into something you don't want to do. 
Good luck, whatever you decide.


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## southernlove (Apr 8, 2013)

Very good information! I am on the fence about it yes. I think because we have such a wild side this has come out.. I can imagine it~ think maybe, but over think what you nailed... It takes one person to ruin it. And I worry about where and when do things like this end? But I also worry that he would stray if we don't. Lame excuse I know, but some people are truly insatiable. If you don't get what you want wouldn't you look elsewhere? I guess I need to educate myself more on this and really decide if its something worth it.


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## tacoma (May 1, 2011)

This should go on that short list of "never dos".

There's just too much possible resentment that could come from this.

My wife has asked repeatedly for a FFM threesome.
I don't think it'd go down quite as wonderfully as she envisions so I refused.

I will use it as part of our sex life and mutual fantasizing however and she seems satisfied with that for now at least.


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## deejov (Sep 24, 2011)

Never, as a rule in life, allow your personal morals to be swayed by someone else. Never. It's the biggest thing you own in life. 
That is different from exploring your sexuality and making your own decision about whether or not you like \ dislike something. 

But you shouldn't have to have sex with someone else to keep your partner. That makes your partner not worth keeping.


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## Cubby (Mar 28, 2012)

On this forum you're not going to get much support for pursuing this idea. And I agree, it's not a good idea to go down that road. There are so many things that can go wrong. 

Becoming intimate with another guy, and bonding with him, and all with your boyfriend's permission can make you look at and perceive your husband in a completely different way. Subconsciously, you don't want your husband to give another man permission to fook you. You want him to protect you and to be a strong masculine man who would never let another man be with his woman. He wants to become what's called a 'cuckold.' If you're a normal woman, I'd think you'd lose respect for a man like that.

You're playing with dynamite here....but then you're not married and there's no kids involved so maybe you two might think the excitement and thrills are worth the risk of blowing up your engagement....

By the way, there are several 'swinging' websites out there that discuss this lifestyle in great detail. Lots of talk about entering it and if it's for you. They all are in agreement that it's something that's not for everyone. I'd guess that there's a small percentage of couples who are capable of dealing with the issues, the jealousy, the mental images of your spouse with someone else that will occur. This small percentage are wildly enthusiastic about it though. Except I'd guess that a lot of them end up divorced eventually.


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## Wiserforit (Dec 27, 2012)

My wife has fantasies about me doing another girl and watching. I am not prepared to do this. There are things that can stay fantasies. How can our relationship be harmed if I don't do this? She's not going to leave me because I refuse to do another girl, right?


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

My SO and I have done this. But we're also card carrying sex club members... . It has a relatively high risk of problems, I think. But with two mature people who have good/great communication, I do think it can work. They have to respect each others feelings, they have to make the primary relationship the focus of anything they do, and they have to be willing to stick with the ground rules. 

I'd probably recommend keeping it in the fantasy area until you're positive it's something you want as much as he does. 

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Cubby (Mar 28, 2012)

southernlove said:


> But I also worry that he would stray if we don't. Lame excuse I know, but some people are truly insatiable. If you don't get what you want wouldn't you look elsewhere?


If you don't want to do this, and it sounds like deep inside you really don't, then you have to firmly put your foot down and tell him this is unacceptable. Sure there's a chance he'll stray, but that would be true no matter what you decide. You hear that excuse a lot with swingers. They justify what they're doing saying it keeps their partner from cheating. 

If you think your partner might cheat just because you won't share them or allow yourself to be shared, it's time for a serious evaluation of the worthiness of your partner as a lifelong spouse.


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## Theseus (Feb 22, 2013)

southernlove said:


> I'm thinking about it, but worry about taking it out of a fantasy and them having him think I truly am the '****' we act out~



What's wrong with him thinking that?




> Or how to start something discreet like that- IF ITS EVEN LEGAL!!



If you live in a country like Iran or Saudi Arabia, then no, it's not legal, and you can be stoned to death. If you live in a Western Democracy, you don't have anything to worry about.


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## Theseus (Feb 22, 2013)

So Tacoma & Wiseforit,

Your wife would like to have a FFM, and you refused?

Holy cow. 

I feel like a kid from a starving African country, watching rich Americans throw away food...


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## stevehowefan (Apr 3, 2013)

There's no way I, as a husband, would EVER let another dude touch my wife. And I, as a husband, would NEVER want another woman in my bedroom. I have a buddy whose wife wanted a threesome with another woman. It was her best friend. Well, it's been five years and he has tagged just about anything that has came along. And she wonders why he won't be faithful. Hell, she invited a shark into a pool full of blood. What the did she think was going to happen? This is just my opinion. Some couples may have no qualms with it.


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## stevehowefan (Apr 3, 2013)

Matter of fact, I'd be highly upset if my wife wanted either one. And no, I'm not gay. I just respect the sanctity of marriage. Why be married if not to honor one another? Once again, that's just me.


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## Cubby (Mar 28, 2012)

Theseus said:


> So Tacoma & Wiseforit,
> 
> Your wife would like to have a FFM, and you refused?
> 
> ...


There's a reason Wiseforit didn't come up with the username, 'impulsiveforit.' 

He and Tacoma are wise.


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## brokenhearted118 (Jan 31, 2013)

stevehowefan said:


> Matter of fact, I'd be highly upset if my wife wanted either one. And no, I'm not gay. I just respect the sanctity of marriage. Why be married if not to honor one another? Once again, that's just me.


:iagree::iagree::iagree:

If you want an open relationship where you are having sex with other people, that is not the definition of marriage. I suggest a visit to Merriam Websters Dictionary:

Definition of MARRIAGE:
(1) : the state of being united to *A* person of the opposite sex as husband or wife in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law. 

Note the bolded A: meaning singular/one person. A committed relationship is among 2 adults and wedding vows are more than mere words. Love, honor, cherish, etc....


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## tacoma (May 1, 2011)

Theseus said:


> So Tacoma & Wiseforit,
> 
> Your wife would like to have a FFM, and you refused?
> 
> ...


It's because I don't think she really wants it.

I think the idea turns her on but I'm pretty damn sure the moment she saw me penetrate another woman that fantasy would be blown out of the water with jealousy.

She'd NEVER get that image out of her head and the way my wife focusses and expands self guilt it would drive her mad.

I think it would eventually destroy us just as easily as my having an affair would.

Then there's my terror, I'd bet a paycheck I'd need some viagra to even think about maintaining an erection with an OW while my wife was in the room.
I would be constantly worrying and wondering what she was feeling/thinking.

It's just not going to happen.,
I can't see it being a pleasurable experience for anyone really.


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## Jim LINY (Mar 30, 2013)

Don't do it. If life is good, that is a very dangerous variable to introduce.


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## Paulination (Feb 6, 2012)

I can't relate to a man that would like to see his wife with another man. Seems like the ultimate display of betaism.


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## Wiserforit (Dec 27, 2012)

Theseus said:


> So Tacoma & Wiseforit,
> 
> Your wife would like to have a FFM, and you refused?
> 
> ...


I understand how you feel. It just doesn't mean enough to me. I have a similar fantasy about watching two guys do my wife at the same time. Nowhere near as urgent as her fantasy about me, but it is nothing I would actually arrange. 

Chasing my kids around the house and having them laugh with glee - there's so much joy in that. Way beyond what I could have imagined. We're just going to focus on that.

edit - oh with us she has tried numerous times to wheedle me into it. Not just an idea for her, she definitly wants me to do it and I've had to stop her.


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## Cubby (Mar 28, 2012)

I remember several years ago when Adam Carolla and Dr. Drew had that radio sextalk show and a guy called in asking for advice on adding a third person to the bedroom. The first thing Carolla and Drew asked was, "do you have kids?" The advice given was, if you have kids DON'T DO IT. They said there's a good chance your marriage will end if you introduce this into your marriage.


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## Theseus (Feb 22, 2013)

Wiserforit said:


> edit - oh with us she has tried numerous times to wheedle me into it. Not just an idea for her, she definitly wants me to do it and I've had to stop her.



You definitely won't get sympathy from me here...

OK, I'll change my analogy a little. Now I feel like a starving child in a third world country, stomach bloated, desperate for a scrap of food, watching an anorexic American refusing food even as someone is trying to push it into his/her mouth.

Sigh...


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## naga75 (Jul 5, 2012)

My wife and i did it. 
It was also with her best friend. 
I knew what she was comfortable with and what she wasnt, so no PIV with best friend and really i hardly touched her. 
It was one of my wifes fantasies that i do her while she did a girl so there you have it. 
It hasnt affected our marriage AT ALL. 
Of course, bestie also knew about my wifes affair and OM pretty much from day one. So she isnt really welcome in my home anymore. 
As far as another man touching my wife with my knowledge? Or while i was actually present? Not hardly. If she fantasizes about that, she is SOL as my wife.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Stonewall (Jul 5, 2011)

Fantasies are fun and have no unintended consequences. Not so of reality.


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## plasmasunn (Apr 3, 2013)

My first bit of advice...if you're on the fence, don't do it. Introducing others into your bedroom without both people totally on board could equal disaster. In my opinion, being poly-amorous isn't something anyone can ever really "warm up to" you either want it or you don't. 

I'm a straight, married woman, but I've always had a sexual interest in other women (never wanted to date one or have a relationship with one...but I find the female form absolutely gorgeous and have been with several women.) I can tell you my husband (then-boyfriend) and I had a FFM threesome and I'll be honest, it was amazing. I was open with my man from the very beginning of our relationship about my sexual interest in women, but it wasn't something I actively pursued, it just happened when it happened. (Like, that threesome...wasn't planned, just happened.) And after that threesome, I independently hooked up with that same woman a short time later and when I told my husband, he absolutely lost it. 

We ended up on a break, he told me I'd cheated on him (I honestly didn't feel like I did...if I thought of it the way he eventually expressed he did, I wouldn't have done it) and it took a long time to get over. I was shocked because he LOVED the threesome (I will never forget the look on his face, actually!) but hated the idea of me with anyone other than him if he wasn't around.

My point is, this can work if two people want it and communicate about it openly. My mistake was not communicating effectively and I ended up hurting the most important person in the world to me. We have since laid boundries and the same miscomm hasn't happened again. And yes, fantasy can be VERY different from reality! Maybe you should ask your man to REALLY think about what it would mean to watch you have sex with another guy. There are a TON of men who get off on this (just Google "cuckhold" but not at work!) and personally, yeah, it's an odd sexual kink, but certainly not the craziest one I've ever heard. 

Bottom line...I believe extra sex partners in a relationship can work, it really just depends on the people.


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## soulpotato (Jan 22, 2013)

I agree with deejov. This is a terrible idea.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## CuddleBug (Nov 26, 2012)

Everything sexually is great and you love your hubby, right?

Why would you want to have sex with another man? That would be comitting adultery on purpose and breaking your marriage vows.

3 some, etc down the road usually ends of badly, so this fantasy should remain just as that, a fantasy.

Now if you're single, dating, then I guess anything can happen, but that stops when you get married.

What's to say, your hubby wants to have sex with another hot woman while you watch?

There are so many fantasies and fetishes you can do together, almost limitness to your imaginations, so do that instead.

Have crazy anal sex. Feet. Sex standing up, with you upside down. Outside, have sex with him while he is asleep, bondage, light stapping on the bum and back, blind folding, the sky is the limit amoung all the sexual positions.


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## stevehowefan (Apr 3, 2013)

Have you and your husband tried to bunny hop across the bedroom? I mean, that is some wild stuff in and of itself. Hell on the quads, but fun amirite?


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## Wiserforit (Dec 27, 2012)

Theseus said:


> You definitely won't get sympathy from me here...
> 
> OK, I'll change my analogy a little. Now I feel like a starving child in a third world country, stomach bloated, desperate for a scrap of food, watching an anorexic American refusing food even as someone is trying to push it into his/her mouth.
> 
> Sigh...


Well no sympathy desired. I'm pretty thrilled at her attitude. She brings me internet girls on the computer screen and wants me to watch them together while I do her. She knows exactly what to pick.

This was a girl who was VERY jealous in the beginning. It leads me to believe that a lot of these girls who are so jealous of porn might be able to open up a whole new avenue to fun in the bedroom, and if they want to see buff Chippendale type boys while with their husband I see no harm in that.


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## SomedayDig (Jul 17, 2012)

The swinging scene isn't for everyone. Period. This is something to talk about openly and honestly in every sense of the words. There are couples who swing who have a TON more honesty and communication in their lives than most. I'd say, if you're curious look up local clubs or even house parties that are nearby. A club would be the easiest, IMO because it's public. Let him see other guys really look at you. Let him see and feel what it's like when another guy wants to be with you sexually.

You'll know if it's gonna work pretty quickly.


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## Grayson (Oct 28, 2010)

Several years ago, my wife confided in me that she'd long harbored a fantasy of being with another woman. I gave her my blessing as long as I ate wet got to be in the room. She began to look for someone to fit the bill. During her search, her EA and PA with two men came to light and almost ended us. At that time, she stopped her search, coming to the conclusion that, given what we'd just been through, it wouldn't be good for us...that, even if I felt I could handle seeing her with another woman, she doesn't think I can. There are times that I applaud her thinking it through, and times I wish we could throw caution to the winds. Her way in this matter is probably for the best.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Theseus (Feb 22, 2013)

CuddleBug said:


> Why would you want to have sex with another man? That would be comitting adultery on purpose and breaking your marriage vows.



It may be adultery, but unless her marriage vows included no sex with other people, then she wouldn't be breaking her marriage vows.


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## Jonathan35 (Feb 28, 2013)

This is a great fantasy. Use it for what it is. If you say "never" it will kill the thrill of it and it will fade away. That's not good. Just agree that if the absolutely perfect situation just naturally occurs (and include so many factors and variables that it would take a miracle for the perfect situation to happen) then you would do it in a heartbeat and you would love it. That will keep the fantasy alive and will functionally eliminate the reality and all of the downsides of the reality. He will totally be OK with that. In the meantime, get a toy and act it out like another man is there. He just wants to see you getting off on something kinky. Give it to him.


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## Alexandria (Apr 21, 2013)

No, no and did I say NO. Some things are better left as fantasies. Bringing people into the bedroom, other than the two of you, will lead to bad, bad things, unless you are willing to adopt this lifestyle of threesomes, possibly women in the bedroom, group sex, orgies, swinging, etc. etc. I would NEVER do it. I can't even imagine my husband saying, "Hey, I want to watch another man have sex with you." Yes, it is a fantasy, but leave it as such, period.. not open for discussion. You don't have to succumb to his desires to keep him happy. Don't sacrifice yourself in ANY way. I watched a Dr. Phil about this. Some guy would not let us on his wife about watching her have sex with another man. So, she did, to make him happy. Now, she is screwed up in the head and their marriage is swirling the drain. Don't do it. He is a pervert and it is okay to be a bit pervy in your head, but making it a reality, makes it a reality.


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## salamander (Apr 2, 2013)

Alexandria said:


> No, no and did I say NO. Some things are better left as fantasies. Bringing people into the bedroom, other than the two of you, will lead to bad, bad things, unless you are willing to adopt this lifestyle of threesomes, possibly women in the bedroom, group sex, orgies, swinging, etc. etc. I would NEVER do it. I can't even imagine my husband saying, "Hey, I want to watch another man have sex with you." Yes, it is a fantasy, but leave it as such, period.. not open for discussion. You don't have to succumb to his desires to keep him happy. Don't sacrifice yourself in ANY way. I watched a Dr. Phil about this. Some guy would not let us on his wife about watching her have sex with another man. So, she did, to make him happy. Now, she is screwed up in the head and their marriage is swirling the drain. Don't do it. He is a pervert and it is okay to be a bit pervy in your head, but making it a reality, makes it a reality.


My husband and i took it out of fantasyland and brought another man into our bed. Even though we didn't go all the way, my worst fear happened. I became limerent on the om. Limerence is an involuntary obsessive crush with severe emotional highs and lows that depend upon if the other person reciprocates. It is a horrible, horrible feeling because i am super in love with my husband, but now because of our actions, i have this nagging brain frizz and emotional energy drain. And i call us lucky that that's the only consequence. Limerence is a life destroyer, and it comes without warning. It is mentioned in the polyamory bible, "the ethical ****". Take heed and keep fantasy intact. Nothing spoils a hot fantasy like a bitter dose of reality. And in the words of the main character in the movie "interstate 60": "the world's greatest **** is the one you never had!"
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## DrSher (Jul 17, 2016)

The Holy grail for Alphas is an FFM. I have no interest, or negative interest in being with another guy. If wife wanted that, I would let her have at it, but not with me. I have a good "friend" of mine willing to do it with us, a hot single mum that I know from gym. Wife has met her before and likes her, but we shall see how it goes further. If there isn't an hour in my life without thinking about sex, there isn't a day in my life...


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## Evinrude58 (Jun 16, 2014)

I'm just thankful I don't have any desire for all thus foolishness.
I think wanting to see another dude screw your wife is a true indicator of mental illness. NO man should want a other guy to screw his wife. And to ask for it is the epitome of insanity.

Jmo
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## katiecrna (Jan 29, 2016)

My husband has a similar fantasy. However I am not as open as you are. My body literally shuts down and dries up the second he starts talking about it while we are having sex. It doesn't seem like you want to do this, so right now I would say don't do it. At least for now. We all want to make our spouses happy but we also need to be comfortable and respect ourselves too. Maybe in the future you will be into exploring it, but right now you don't seem there. 
I think being sexually adventurous is great, but where does it stop? Do you have to keep upping the ante? Plus what if you do it and he absolutely loves it, and he wants it more and more? I personally think you should hold off, and go with what your gut says


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## pidge70 (Jan 17, 2011)

The OP hasn't posted in 3yrs.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Spicy (Jun 18, 2016)

A couple so deeply in love. Engaged, ready to vow lives to each other. So compatible!

But first, let's watch each other cheat. It might be hot for an hour. 

Then as time goes by and the erosion begins its destruction, you will wonder why you risked your true love? 

Oh yeah, it will have been based on ideas recommended to you in the solid reality known as Porn.


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## tech-novelist (May 15, 2014)

brokenhearted118 said:


> :iagree::iagree::iagree:
> 
> If you want an open relationship where you are having sex with other people, that is not the definition of marriage. I suggest a visit to Merriam Websters Dictionary:
> 
> ...


I assume this has been updated to the new definition where the partners don't have to be of the opposite sex.

And in a few years they will get rid of the limit of 2 as well...


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Well if it is what they call hotwife this is really about power. I mean how much more power can you have over a person then to get them to abandon there own morals. Of course people will argue with me but the power thing is the aphrodisiac. It's really about pimping your wife.


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## MarriedDude (Jun 21, 2014)

Lots of activity for a zombie
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## pidge70 (Jan 17, 2011)

MarriedDude said:


> Lots of activity for a zombie
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I know right?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## DrSher (Jul 17, 2016)

Where do we draw a line here then? Can your girlfriend/wife dance with other girls? Hug? be in water? 

How about watching porn together? Is that wrong too? 

FFM is not politically correct, helluva fun.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

DrSher said:


> Where do we draw a line here then? Can your girlfriend/wife dance with other girls? Hug? be in water?
> 
> How about watching porn together? Is that wrong too?
> 
> FFM is not politically correct, helluva fun.


Yeah all those things are similar. Nice straw-man though.


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## DrSher (Jul 17, 2016)

sokillme said:


> Yeah all those things are similar. Nice straw-man though.


 I was actually asking a serious question. Where is the line drawn?


To some women, it may be if you check another girl out with your eyes.

To some women it may be if you watch porn.

To some women it may be watching something special

To some women, it may be going to strip club.

To some women, it may be talking to an ex.

To some women it may be making out with a girl at a party.

To some women, it may be asking for a threesome.

To some women, it may be having sex with another women without wife there.


My point is that there IS a line that differ for everybody. 

Where is yours and hers?


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

DrSher said:


> I was actually asking a serious question. Where is the line drawn?
> 
> 
> To some women, it may be if you check another girl out with your eyes.
> ...


In my opinion the line is *INTENT*. A person can do NONE OF THE ABOVE and cross the line if the intentions are harmful to the relationship. A person can also do ALL OF THE ABOVE if the intentions are not to harm the relationship and never cross the line. BOTH situations can occur within the same relationship. 

For example some friends of ours have a wife that is jealous of the husband's coworker. He admitted to his wife that he had feelings for this woman but that he had never acted on them, except to think about her when he masturbated. This was very bad and upset the wife. 

At the same time they would often goto strip clubs together and get lap dances together from strippers as a way to party and have fun. This was OK and fun for them as a couple. It was something they were both OK with doing. 

Badsanta


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## NobodySpecial (Nov 22, 2013)

Meh. Yah the idea of alt relationships scares the crap out of a lot of people. I would recommend this:

https://www.amazon.com/Opening-Up-C...TF8&qid=1469389271&sr=8-2&keywords=opening+up

My husband never wanted what you described. But we were swingers for years. There is really no need to cheat when you can be radically honest. I would say our marriage is better for having done it. But the journey, like marriage itself, has pitfalls. Be prepared to weather them. Seriously. Read the book.


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

badsanta said:


> For example some friends of ours have a wife that is jealous of the husband's coworker. He admitted to his wife that he had feelings for this woman but that he had never acted on them, except to think about her when he masturbated. This was very bad and upset the wife.




Why in the world did he tell his wife that???


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## larry.gray (Feb 21, 2011)

blueinbr said:


> Why in the world did he tell his wife that???


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## Imissmywife (Jan 29, 2016)

I feel that with our experience I can knowledgeably reply to this question. A little background........

We were engaged and living together, and during some pillow talk shared our fantasies. Come to find out we both fantasized about swapping and threesomes. After watching that genre of porn and literary readings we decided to give it a try. We took at an ad, and after meeting public ally with a few couples, found one that we clicked with. The other wife was bi, and my wife had bi fantasies, but that's another thread.

My wife informed me that she didn't think she could handle seeing me with another woman, and although I was very disappointed, I accepted it. So that couple was out, but I still had the huge desire to share her in an MFM. An old College friend had family in town, and one holiday week he paid them a visit. We met him for dinner/drinks and then back to our place. One thing lead to another, and we had the most mind blowing sex with him that night. She had countless orgasms and we had a couple each. After he left we had great reclamation sex that was very intense. In the afterglow she said that she wanted to do it again, so we did two nights later. Again, over the top hot. My emotions ran the range from jealousy to aroused to insecure to totally turned on.

We were married 3 months later.......still having a great sex life where my friend was occasionally included in the talk/roll play. Three months later I had a business trip to where this friend lived, and my wife jumped at the chance to come along. Again, an awesome night of raw hotel 3sum sex, and again intense reclamation sex for us.

About a year later he was back in town and we went out for dinner/drinks, and he and I were both thinking we'd head back to our place for another steamy evening. He excused himself to the restroom, and while he was gone I asked her if she had any plans for another session with him. She said NO! WTH? He was as disappointed as I was, and we went our separate ways. On the drive home I asked what was wrong, and she said basically that she thought it was something that a proper wife and mother (she brought two kids with her into the marriage) shouldn't be doing.

Fast forward 17 years into the marriage.......it is still one of my favorite fantasies, memories that I use when alone. Our sex life has gone from smoking hot to non existent (3 times in the last 4 years). We were "discussing" this a month or so ago, and she said that she didn't want to have sex when all I think about when we're knocking boots is those Mfm memories. I told her that no one put a gun to her head or in any way forced her to do it, that she's the one that suggested having him back again 2 nights later, and that she jumped at the chance to travel,with me and do it again. I asked if she enjoyed herself, and she said that it was hot, but it wasn't right.

So here we sit, with no sex life. I thought I had married my sexual soul mate who willingly participated in one of our kinks. Now I'm in a sexless marriage and wonder if this 3sum activity is coming back to bite me in the butt.

Like my user name says, I miss my wife!


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