# i freaking cant stop texting him



## All of a sudden (Jan 24, 2013)

I keep texting my husband who two days ago said he wanted a divorce cause he doesnt love me anymore. We have four kids. He is out of town on a business trip and wont talk to me. I keep texting him and calling and he wont pick up or respond. Its driving me insane. Im going to a lawyer tommorow and i want him to tell me not to so bad. He wants me too i guess. I feel so freaking pathetic begging someone who doesnt want me all of a sudden. I sit on my hands saying im not going to do it again, then i do. GOD help me, im sure he thinks im pathetic.


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## Bee2012 (Dec 8, 2012)

So sorry you are going through this. I swear, all our pride goes out the window when this happens. Things will get better. Don't text him. Write him a long letter instead to occupy your time, and then dont send it to him. Keep yourself busy.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## oncehisangel (Oct 13, 2012)

180 my dear girl.

He needs to miss you sweety...put your thumbs in your pockets. 

We know it's hard... but you have to do this.


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## oncehisangel (Oct 13, 2012)

ps.. read the 180..its for you...not him though.

Concentrate on you.

Sometimes the benefit of 'letting them go' is they do think of you. 

But this is for YOU.

So sorry you are joining us here at TAM


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## All of a sudden (Jan 24, 2013)

I feel im going to throw up my dinner. How do your best friends turn into evil villans overnight?


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## lee101981 (Sep 6, 2012)

By you texting him you are pushing him away
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## All of a sudden (Jan 24, 2013)

Where do i find the 180?


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## All of a sudden (Jan 24, 2013)

lee101981 said:


> By you texting him you are pushing him away
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I know im being a complete idiot but im so freaked out i cant stop. Slap myself!


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

I don't think it happens over night. Over time they morph. Or maybe they just start showing their real colors.

Take a look at the 180 link in my signature block below. That's how you need to start interacting with him.

Call up a friend or family member who will support you. Text that person if you need to text someone. The idea of you writing him a letter is a good idea as well. Just do not send it. Keep it for yourself or delete it.


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## Bellavista (May 29, 2012)

I know, it is hard to stop yourself from pleading & begging. However, it really does not help. Really, truly, it does not help & in a lot of cases, can make the spouse who is leaving more stubborn.

Just concentrate on breathing, in and out. Big deep breaths.


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## All of a sudden (Jan 24, 2013)

Thanks, good ideas, but hard to implement, when i feel like breaking down. Will do my best to try.


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## Bee2012 (Dec 8, 2012)

You will get through tonight . That's all you need to worry about for now. One day at a time.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Chopsy (Oct 10, 2012)

i dont know about you. but its always in the evening/night i feel the urge to text. someone on here once said never text if youre wearing pyjamas. i would also say never text after 7pm. If you feel tempted, please post on here first. ok? i know its tough but you will feel better for not giving in. I cant tell you how often i texted my H and the next morning felt like crap about it!


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## K.C. (Dec 1, 2012)

Use TAM as a venting / sounding board. This place is a gold mine of support and advice. Dont be afraid to say whatever you feel you need to. If someone comes along and slaps you down, it will be well meant and it's better than doing something irreversible or that makes a bad situation worst.

Look at things you genuinely want/need to change. Not things that will make him happier with you but will make you happier with yourself.


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## Stella Moon (Nov 22, 2012)

By now you texts are just you repeating yourself. You've said it all and he's heard it all. Nothing is mattering and it's all garbling and your setting yourself up for rejection at every single text. 

Knock it off. Get yourself respect back. Start the 180 now hard core and go dark. 

Listen to these people girl...they know what they are talking about...as do I...
Have you had enough rejection from him yet? Take your self control back and yes...see a lawyer. Follow through.


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## NoWhere (Oct 2, 2012)

Listen to what everyone here has said and don't text him anymore. Don't beat yourself up about it. We've all been there. I know I sent email after email to my ex and always hated myself after sending it, but I couldn't stop either. It always does more harm then good, but what is done is done. Wipe the slate clean and start over.


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## K.C. (Dec 1, 2012)

And just to add, don't beat yourself up over any little slips or moments of weakness, they are natural and we all have them.. I've been known to be fine and happy one minute and fivbe minutes later have sent a text I know is a bad idea. When you have a weak moment, post on here (preferably before acting upon it) and we will beat you instead; in the nicest possible way of course!


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## Bellavista (May 29, 2012)

When my fWH gave me the 'I don't love you anymore, maybe I never did' speech, he was in another country (with another woman so it turned out).
I bombarded him with texts. It did no good, he did not respond to them. If only I had known then, what I know now, I would have done a 180 and started the healing process much quicker.
Sure, you feel shattered, your world feels like it is caving in, but bombading, begging & pleading has never helped in this situation. A lot of us have been there, a lot of us made mistakes, we want to help you avoid some of the mistakes we made.
I know turning your phone off it too hard, you will be clutching it like a life preserver, hoping against hope that he sends a text telling you he changed his mind, it was all a big mistake. Just try really hard to resist sending texts to him.


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## NoWhere (Oct 2, 2012)

I know I still from time to time check my phone for texts from the Ex just out of habit.


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## mama2five (Dec 29, 2012)

I am guilty of the txts and emails when he left. It was rough. Its not healthy. Your not alone! I still check my phone constantly! But NC is best. Give him a chance to miss you.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Well if you are going to text him, find some good jokes and test those to him.

He will freak out an wonder what the hey is going on with you that you don't care enough that he's left. Might be a good way to mess with his head...

Ok I'm joking.. sort of


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## Stella Moon (Nov 22, 2012)

EleGirl said:


> Well if you are going to text him, find some good jokes and test those to him.
> 
> He will freak out an wonder what the hey is going on with you that you don't care enough that he's left. Might be a good way to mess with his head...
> 
> Ok I'm joking.. sort of


Guys with small wieners jokes...


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## Decorum (Sep 7, 2012)

There are a lot of good people in your very spot.
When someone withdraws it creates a vacuum, and the pain is beyond words, if you are human and this happenes, this is how it feels. Its not you.
I'm so sorry!


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Take his number out of your phone.

That way, you have to put it in to text him and by the time you hit all 10 numbers, you may rethink things.

Or text, but save in drafts and not send (this worked for me).

But STOP texting him. Stop it. You are making yourself look desperate and that is never attractive.


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