# Divorce in CA



## lemonade (Oct 18, 2010)

After much deliberation, I've come to the conclusion that divorce is what's best for my husband and I. I know that trust can take a long time to return but I just don't have it in me anymore to try to believe anything that he says. He's lied to me too much and I feel this relationship can't be salvaged. Nor do I believe he can be honest about his feelings towards me. 

I'm not sure how to go about filing for divorce in California. I am tight on money so I'm not sure that I can hire an attorney. Is there anyway I can do this myself? If anyone here has had any experience with divorce in California, I would appreciate any advice. Thank you.


----------



## tom67 (Oct 2, 2012)

Well if your husband makes more money than you it will turn out well. From what I have learned in other threads, if you are married for 6 yrs or more you could get lifetime alimony. BFF and eric415 he is in the private section, could give you more insight.


----------



## lemonade (Oct 18, 2010)

tom67 said:


> Well if your husband makes more money than you it will turn out well. From what I have learned in other threads, if you are married for 6 yrs or more you could get lifetime alimony. BFF and eric415 he is in the private section, could give you more insight.


We've been married less than 6 years and have no children. I don't want his money.


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

tom67 said:


> Well if your husband makes more money than you it will turn out well. From what I have learned in other threads, if you are married for 6 yrs or more you could get lifetime alimony. BFF and eric415 he is in the private section, could give you more insight.


No, it's not 6 years or more for life long alimony in CA.

Up to 20 years (short term marriage) it can be alimony for 1/2 the period of the marriage.

After 20 years (Long term marriage), it can be life long. However, California is moving more and more away from life-long alimony towards wanting both spouses to be self-supporting. So even in long term marriages you can end up with a few years of re-habilatative support.


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

lemonade said:


> We've been married less than 6 years and have no children. I don't want his money.


If you are not going to go for spousal support and/or are not entitled to it then the process is not too bad.



Here's a link to the California Court Self Help website

Completing Divorce or Separation - divorce_or_separation_selfhelp

Basically all assets/debts accumulated during divorce are split 50/50.

Any assets/debt from before marriage are generally sole-property/sole-debt.


----------



## me2pointoh (Jan 31, 2012)

Legal typing services have been recommended to me, you might look into that. They help you navigate the mountain of paperwork. There are several in my small town so you shouldn't have trouble finding one. When I called, I was quoted $400 for this service and she told me it cost $430 to file. Still out of my budget but I am working to overcome that hurdle.

This works best if there isn't a dispute though...
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Thumper (Mar 23, 2013)

I'm just wondering why you wouldn't be willing to try a separation first? Divorce is so final, and you might just be to caught up emotionally to make decide? Not knowing any back story of course, its seems drastic to me I guess.

nvm, went back and did some reading. divorce on!!


----------



## brokenbythis (Aug 21, 2011)

Thumper said:


> I'm just wondering why you wouldn't be willing to try a separation first? Divorce is so final, and you might just be to caught up emotionally to make decide? Not knowing any back story of course, its seems drastic to me I guess.
> 
> nvm, went back and did some reading. divorce on!!


I filed for legal sep in CA when I found out one of the women he was banging is pregnant. 2 reasons: I am disgusted with him and wanted to start the legal process, and 2nd: To protect myself and our son financially before she starts filing for child support - in CA whoever gets judgement first gets the biggest slice of the pie. I also left the door open just a crack because when he told me she was pregnant he had already left her weeks before and swore black and blue he made such a huge mistake, still loved me, wanted his family back and didn't want anything to do with her or the child except for child support.

6 weeks later I find out he's still in contact with her, and probably still sleeping with her/taking her out.

Now I want to convert it to divorce. I went no contact 2 wks ago and I believe he's fully back with her now. Even though he swore he couldn't stand her, it was only sex. He left her for a reason.

They can have each other. Water finds its own level.


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

me2pointoh said:


> Legal typing services have been recommended to me, you might look into that. They help you navigate the mountain of paperwork. There are several in my small town so you shouldn't have trouble finding one. When I called, I was quoted $400 for this service and she told me it cost $430 to file. Still out of my budget but I am working to overcome that hurdle.
> 
> This works best if there isn't a dispute though...


Do you live in California? If so look at the link I provided above.


This link is a page where you can request a fee waiver based on hardship/low income.

Fee Waivers - getting_started_selfhelp


----------

