# He answered with I am guilty of cruel treatment toward him



## gigi888 (Oct 6, 2013)

I dont know what to think or what to do anymore. He answered to the divorce petition with I am guilty of cruel treatment and this is why the marriage ended!!!!!!!

What should I do?


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## SadSamIAm (Oct 29, 2010)

I don't know what your situation is, but in my marriage my wife will withhold affection, intimacy and sex. I have often thought of this as cruel treatment.

I don't see why you need to do anything. He will feel what he feels in regards to why the marriage ended and you will have your opinion. Does it matter? Does it affect custody, alimony, division of assets?


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## gigi888 (Oct 6, 2013)

well, I filed on ground of adultery and this is what he comes back with. On the paper, he said he want a disporportional share of the asset.

Have anyone have to deal wtih this? Please help


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## Pluto2 (Aug 17, 2011)

Texas is one of those jurisdictions that considers fault in the division of marital property, so its seems he's trying to get as much as possible from the D. It will come down to proof. Do you have proof of adultery to present to the court?


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## gigi888 (Oct 6, 2013)

I have cell phone bills showing the abnormal amount of text he have with that girl (hundreds throughout the day) and witness showing them together abnormally friendly.

I dont want to get more money. I just wanted adultery on the paper to show that he is at fault for breaking the marriage as he keep on putting all the blame on me.

So I dont understand why he put i am guilty of cruel treatment toward him.


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## norajane (Feb 7, 2012)

> So I dont understand why he put i am guilty of cruel treatment toward him.


Because he does want more money, and because he wants YOU to be the one at fault so he can get more money. He'll use whatever legal grounds possible to do so. I don't know what the at-fault divorce grounds are in Texas, but I imagine they are limited to only a few things like adultery, abuse, and cruel treatment. Since you didn't cheat, and didn't abuse him, then his only option is to select cruelty. 

Get yourself an excellent lawyer.


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## gigi888 (Oct 6, 2013)

Norajane- I have a good lawyer. I am just not sure if he is stating that saying i falsely accused him of adultery or he is saying this cus he wants more money.


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## SadSamIAm (Oct 29, 2010)

Sounds like he will be trying to say that his adultury was caused by your 'cruel treatment'. 

Don't think that will fly in court. If you were so cruel, he should have left the marriage, not cheated.

In court he will need to provide evidence/examples of your 'cruel treatment'.


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## Pluto2 (Aug 17, 2011)

Texas courts can consider fault in the dissolution of the marriage as a factor when dividing property. If he could prove that your cruelty led to the destruction of the marriage, it would justify the court's ruling in giving him more than a 50-50 split. But my understanding is that earning capacity might play as much of a factor as anything. Just go over this with your attorney. Honestly, I wouldn't worry too much about this. Its more posturing for the property division.


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## honcho (Oct 5, 2013)

Its posturing on his part, he will claim you drove him into the arms of another therefore he isnt guilty of adultry. Something like that. 

If/when the lawyers get together and start negotiating they will pull out an isolated incident or two, spin it to sound horrible. Its just lawyer games.


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## gigi888 (Oct 6, 2013)

Ok....but isn't this silly given only the lawyer will be rich from this? What gain will he have? We have not even argued in the past 5 months. The last arguement we had was I did not want to do contruction work on the house because it was just too stressful for me.


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## Pluto2 (Aug 17, 2011)

greed


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## ne9907 (Jul 17, 2013)

Why don't you ask him the reason he put "cruel treatment"?
He may truly believe that is the reason he cheated on you, which as we all know, it is an excuse.


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## gigi888 (Oct 6, 2013)

I refused to talk to him right now. Ever since he asked me how we going to split the decoration vases (worth ~20 ea), I cutted all contact with him because he was just trying to drive me crazy.

He forgot who was the one that took care of his dad when he was at the hospital for 6 months. I went everyday...even more than him.

He forgot who invited his mom to stay at our house when his dad was ill.

He forgot that I also told him it is ok if dad wants to move in with us. He is the one that does not want it because he could not stand living with his dad.

He forgot that allowed him to loan his family over $15K.

I am so cruel that I told him to pay for the funeral of his brother because I knew they were tight in money.

All I have done for his family and I get accuss of cruel treatment....the world is truly xxxx-up.


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## ne9907 (Jul 17, 2013)

gigi888 said:


> I refused to talk to him right now. Ever since he asked me how we going to split the decoration vases (worth ~20 ea), I cutted all contact with him because he was just trying to drive me crazy.
> 
> He forgot who was the one that took care of his dad when he was at the hospital for 6 months. I went everyday...even more than him.
> 
> ...


Then I would think he is just being an *******. Take care of yourself and finances. 
WHy is it that people always want to make things more complicated than they have to be?


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## gigi888 (Oct 6, 2013)

I guess this is when you really see the person's true color. So sad. 7 yrs and I get CRUEL TREATMENT when he is the one that is cheating. Yes, I did cause him pain because I was not as affectionate as he would like me to be but I was like this prior to marriage already. I am not an affectionate person and he still decided to get marry.

Everyone need to go into marriage asking yourself "Can you be with this person without any changes for the rest of my life?"


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## honcho (Oct 5, 2013)

yes exactly, the lawyers get rich. In his mind he has nothing to loose, you commented before he was living a lifestyle he couldnt afford, he wants money and stuff. You want it done, simple split and each go your own way.

He probably figures the more inconvenient he makes it the more you will want to just settle, get him gone, hence he will get more. Remember he does you know better than just about anyone. He knows what buttons to push and thats all he is doing. Lawyers seemily love to want to deal with the little no one cares things, its easy billing, it keeps each party mad at each other over nothing and all too often one just yes sure they can have it, it worthless to me. Lets move on.


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## gigi888 (Oct 6, 2013)

I am not one that will allow someone to step all over me and not fight back. If he wants to go down this road, that is fine. I dont need this is end this quickly. I am not the one that have another person in my life so I have nothing to loose in reality if this drags on. I will be calm and just wait it out if needed. I refuse to allow him to bully me again.


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## honcho (Oct 5, 2013)

What till you get a letter from his lawyer asking for a pizza cutter. That is still my favorite and I think I will frame it! His lawyer if/when you go in front of a judge will try to spin it that you havent cooperated over these months because you have refused to communicate, he will just speak in generalities about it. Have the information ready as to the petty, not important, ridiculous requests. Her attorney in my case tried to do that. The judge really did think the pizza cutter letter funny and just made them look foolish. 

You borrowed money to his family, remember that is an asset of the marriage and does need to be accounted for. You expected the money to be repaid. Tell his lawyer he can assume that asset of the marriage and you will deduct from the home equity or something. He will like that. 

Like I said in an earlier posting, he knows how to push your buttons, and he did. He is in fun land, and just doesnt care or deep down inside he is miserable and hes gonna make you miserable.


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## gigi888 (Oct 6, 2013)

I am a lot better now. The intial shock have worned off already thanks to all you guys support. He even rejected the temp order...LOL Well, I have emails after emails of him not replying to my request (ie...what u want in the house? can you provide doc on x,y,&z). Also, I noticed today that he stop replying to my text starting in Sep. There are a number of my text to him saying "Where are u?" with no reply. I will match those date with his text record (which I have cuz he was on my account). Hmmmm...he is able to text this girl that he is not having an affair with but unable to tell his wife where he is at.

I will prepare myself on all the nasty game he will put on me and will try my hardest not to have it affect me....easier said than done...LOL


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## gigi888 (Oct 6, 2013)

Well, Karma kick him in the butt today. His gym bag got stolen. In it was his car key, wallet, cell phone, & apartment key. I had to call me to ask me to give him the spare key. I gave it to a mutal friend so he can go pick it up.....gosh, I wish I can be cruel and just not give to him and let him suffer, but that is not who I am.


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