# Feeling unwanted



## Brokbod (Jul 12, 2013)

My wife tells me that she feels unwanted. She does not get my attention. She gets to do all the household chores and I dont help. And she gives me silence treatment to get my attention, which generally goes on for a week with me asking her whats wrong and she telling me NOTHING. Then every 5-7 days later there is a major showdown with me throwing an anger fit, throwing things, which calms her down and then she tells me because of my this behavior she is having difficulty in this relationship. 

I have a 4 years daughter and a 1 month old son. My daughter is my life. I love her so much that I cant stand make her go through our divorce. But this marriage is killing me. I used to be a happy guy. Always finding fun in every aspect of life. Really ambitious and competitive at work. Now I have lost all my confidence. 

I think I will go nuts very soon. I get nightmares. Only after my marriage I realized how bad I am. 

I make good money and I spend all that on my family. I dont drink or gamble, plus I work from home. Which means I am with my family all the time. I spend all my non working hours with my family. My wife who complains about having to do all the household work has 4 maids and a driver to run errands from outside. How can she get overworked in a small family of four. 

But I know there is something wrong with me. I cant even explain my situation or my side of the story properly. I just hate the silence treatment. I just hate it. I talked to her many times and told her that consider me a little dim witted and please tell me whats bothering you instead of me taking a guess. Because in my life I am always 24/7 guessing what have I done now. 

When I suggested that we should go for a marriage counselling she told me that I should see a therapist and get myself mended because the problem is with me. So I went. My therapist asked me to bring her for one of the sessions so that he can here her side of the story, but that never happened. 

I remain hungry all the time. When she throws this silence treatment at me I am not able to eat properly. I cant even order food from outside because that will open another pandoras box. I cant go out and eat myself because I feel guilty, as If I am doing something wrong. My constantly going hungry makes me angry, which I generally douse with gulping cola and some chips. But once every few days I break and start shouting and turn into that ugly Villain. Thats when she wins and the fight gets over. I go back to my feeling guilty and this cycle repeats itself in another 3-4 days. 

I feel like a rotting garbage from inside. I really want to get out of this trauma and start living again. 

Please advice me.


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## Unique Username (Jul 6, 2013)

"My wife who complains about having to do all the household work has 4 maids and a driver to run errands from outside. How can she get overworked in a small family of four. "


I'm sorry, I'm having little compassion for your plight. You are the one paying for 4 maids and a driver......which you lead us to believe you pay for...yet you go hungry? hmmm

Perhaps she is referring to not getting any attention because she is caring for the 1 month old and you are consumed with work? You have cash for the other "help" how bout a Nanny or two...that might alleviate her feeling of overwork.


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## Brokbod (Jul 12, 2013)

Family of Four means. Me, My Wife, My Daughter and My Son. 

Paying for the maids is no big deal and does not even register since I make good money. So no biggie there and no special efforts on my part on that front. What I am talking about is She has 4 people to help her in a small household.

No Nanny in our household, is her philosophy. I have no objection to that because I love having to look after the kids. When it is burping time, of diaper changing time or singing lullaby in my irritating voice, I am always there. I just cant brestfeed the child. And she has to carry him and all hell breaks loose. I suggested top feeding, but then that is not good for the child. Another philosophy. 

I can single handedly take care of both my kids but I cant be a mother.


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