# used 2 love....



## nicole8125 (Nov 17, 2011)

i used 2 love giving him head and now i just am not that into it anymore. and when we have sex, its just like ok its done and over with. i dont feel any type of emotional connection anymore, i used 2 love giving him head and letting him finish n my mouth because i knew it made him happy. but honestly i have resentment built up because its always about him and we never do forplay and he always is thinking i am cheating on him. i havent cheated at all on him, that hasnt even crossed my mind. i just wish he would step his game up and how do i get him 2 stop thinking i am cheating on him?  people probably think if u arent dont make a big deal outa it, but being with someone u love and u r being 100 percent faithful and he still thinks u r cheating is exhausting emotionally and it makes me not even want him anymore. i could c if i was doing something wrong and he says that stuff, but i am not!! how or is it even posible 4 me 2 ever feel that emotional closeness twoards him i once felt? i feel bad 4 not feeling like that anymore twoards him, but i really dont think i should because if he was doing what he was supposed 2 b doing 4 me like putting some effort into meeting my needs instead of not caring, then i wouldnt feel that way!! what should i do men and as a man y is he thinking i am cheating or he will catch me up sooner or later cheating?? i tell him he wont cuz i dont want anyone else even though i am not happy. i keep having faith things will get better.
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## nice777guy (Nov 23, 2009)

Maybe you should tell him exactly what you just typed. That his accusing you of cheating is hurtful and is making you less attracted to him. Maybe instead of using MORE sex to prove how faithful you are, try not giving him anything at all until he figures out his insecurities.


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## nicole8125 (Nov 17, 2011)

what makes him think he will catch me up sooner or later? i dont understand!!


nice777guy said:


> Maybe you should tell him exactly what you just typed. That his accusing you of cheating is hurtful and is making you less attracted to him. Maybe instead of using MORE sex to prove how faithful you are, try not giving him anything at all until he figures out his insecurities.


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## nice777guy (Nov 23, 2009)

What makes him think you are cheating?


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## Jamison (Feb 10, 2011)

You can't help how you feel. If you don't feel anything for him then you just don't. As far as him accusing you of cheating, I figure either, 1.) The accuser might just be the one cheating. Or 2.) He can sense you no longer feel the way you do and just assumes its because you are cheating. 

I say if you no longer feel the way you used too, and he going to just accuse you regardless of what you try to explain to him, then maybe its time to move on.


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## nicole8125 (Nov 17, 2011)

i love him i always will. but when we have sex its just not there anymore. i just dont no....
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## nice777guy (Nov 23, 2009)

Just wondering - how old are you guys? Any kids together?

And still wondering - why does he think you are cheating? Have either of you ever cheated?


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## nicole8125 (Nov 17, 2011)

he is 15 years older than me and i have one he is being daddy too he has his kids too but there grown etc... we have both cheated n the past i have forgiven him though. someone give me answers!
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## trey69 (Dec 29, 2010)

nicole8125 said:


> he is 15 years older than me and i have one he is being daddy too he has his kids too but there grown etc... we have both cheated n the past i have forgiven him though. someone give me answers!
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


My suggestion to you is, move on. Its not healthy really. You have lost feeling for him, be it emotionally or physically or both. He thinks you are cheating for whatever reason, so therefore doesn't sound productive or healthy. 

I have a feeling if you don't end it, this will just be a vicious cycle.


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## nicole8125 (Nov 17, 2011)

he is 15 years older than me and i have one he is being daddy too he has his kids too but there grown etc... we have both cheated n the past i have forgiven him though. someone give me answers!
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## nicole8125 (Nov 17, 2011)

i have tied my hands of the situation..
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## Trickster (Nov 19, 2011)

nicole8125 said:


> i love him i always will. but when we have sex its just not there anymore. i just dont no....
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


That is your answer you want... He Knows that you are not there anymore. I would think the same thing. If you are not cheating now your thoughts are not really with him and in the near future you may cheat with somebody more your own age that you desire. I don't believe there is anything that you can do or say that will convince him otherwise.


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## nicole8125 (Nov 17, 2011)

i think he is testing me to c even though we arent together 2 c if i would cheat on him, but newsflash he is the only person i have been with this year, and that ISNT going 2 change!!! i think he is just used 2 getting hurt and cant cy a good woman as myself would want a guy like him. maybe? like hes used 2 getting done wrong bye females so now he has a good 1 he cant figure out y i wont cheat on him etc. the only reason y i wont is because no matter what i love him and i would never want him 2 experience the pain i felt when i was cheated on before. that i wouldnt wish on my worst enemy!!! how can i prove 2 him i am not like any of the females he has been with in the passt?
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## nicole8125 (Nov 17, 2011)

love isnt supposed 2 hurt!!! i want 2 b bye his side through thick and thin, the good and the bad!!
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## Jamison (Feb 10, 2011)

nicole8125 said:


> love isnt supposed 2 hurt!!! i want 2 b bye his side through thick and thin, the good and the bad!!
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Then make your decision. But if you're not connected to him anymore for whatever reason, why stay around? You're not married you have no real ties, end it or stay. More than likely he will continue to accuse you of cheating, you will continue to resent him and no longer feel attraction for him, its your call.


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## nicole8125 (Nov 17, 2011)

i called him to wish him a happy birthday but there was no i love u or i miss yous. it was happy birthday an bye that was it. i wanted 2 say how much i missed him and love him but couldnt bring myself 2 it. he needs 2 no he messed up and lost me!
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## trey69 (Dec 29, 2010)

nicole8125 said:


> i called him to wish him a happy birthday but there was no i love u or i miss yous. it was happy birthday an bye that was it. i wanted 2 say how much i missed him and love him but couldnt bring myself 2 it. he needs 2 no he messed up and lost me!
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Don't call him, move on.


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## nicole8125 (Nov 17, 2011)

well i didmove on cuz i am tired of his selfish inappreciative ways, but for some reason, i feel so sick, cant sleep cant eat or anything! it felt sooo good 2 b held and all that. y cant he do the simple things? y did i have 2 run into the arms of another man? i feel bad in 1 since, but then again i shouldnt because i told him what i needed, and he wasnt putting any effort into it, so i foind someone else who did. but i dont want any type of sex from this new guy. ive only been with 1 person this year and i am proud of myself 4 it! i didnt give the new guy a kiss be for he left and he was like i am your man, and u wont kiss me? and i told him i was not going 2 do that!!!! i messed up cuz i texted him and left him a vm and told him how sick i was but i didnt mea 2 leave him the txt, it was accidental. i left him a vm cuz he called and left me one for me 2 call him. what should i do now??? tryina do the 180 method. can someone please explain how 2 do it??
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## 38m3kids (Sep 29, 2011)

nicole8125 said:


> well i didmove on cuz i am tired of his selfish inappreciative ways, but for some reason, i feel so sick, cant sleep cant eat or anything! it felt sooo good 2 b held and all that. y cant he do the simple things? y did i have 2 run into the arms of another man? i feel bad in 1 since, but then again i shouldnt because i told him what i needed, and he wasnt putting any effort into it, so i foind someone else who did. but i dont want any type of sex from this new guy. ive only been with 1 person this year and i am proud of myself 4 it! i didnt give the new guy a kiss be for he left and he was like i am your man, and u wont kiss me? and i told him i was not going 2 do that!!!! i messed up cuz i texted him and left him a vm and told him how sick i was but i didnt mea 2 leave him the txt, it was accidental. i left him a vm cuz he called and left me one for me 2 call him. what should i do now??? tryina do the 180 method. can someone please explain how 2 do it??
> _Posted via Mobile Device_



ummmmmm is this 4 real?  no offense, but sometimes reading messages like this is good therapy for me that maybe my life isn't as screwed up as i perceive it.


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