# New to this



## jennifer38 (Oct 21, 2011)

I have been married for 19 years and we have had problems right from the get go constant up and downs. I believe marriage is supposed to be forever i like being married but this has been horrible at times. He has been verbally and occasionally physically abusive. I don't have any family and we have two teenage daughters and one 7 year old daughter. I have friends but of course it isnt the same. I am having a hard time with coming to terms with the financial end of things as well. He makes the majority of the money and I dont want the kids to suffer. I havent felt the same way about him in a few years last time he threw a can of paint across our living room floor. The other day he had another physical incident he has major anger problems (people outside the family dont no about). I asked him to leave after the last physical incident (he is out of house). We have tried counseling. He is going to counseling currently.


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## chattycathy (Aug 19, 2011)

Is he in an anger management group? That sounds like a critical aspect of what he needs to do on his part.


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## jennifer38 (Oct 21, 2011)

I don't know if there is an anger management group in our area(small town). His counselor is having him read book about anger for dumbies. The book seems helpful.


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## hesnothappy (Mar 5, 2011)

Be careful and protect yourself, and your heart and your finances at all times. Something we all have in common.


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## philomom (Oct 25, 2011)

i am also new to this , seperated 1 month ago yesterday after 25 yrs of marriage , he too was verbally and physically abusive and I stayed hoping aganst hope for a change . I seem to walk about in a daze now - almost zombie like and still wonder why he doesnt seem to be hurting over this and has moved on - I on the other hand had to move 4 hrs away and stay with my sister in order to begin again . It is very difficult especially with the fact that this has devastated me - even with the abuse , just knowing he is fine with this and even seemingly happy makes me feel duped , even foolish that I invested so many years


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## Shooboomafoo (Mar 30, 2011)

Any form of physical abuse or threat is never okay.
Sure you may have lived with it and loved in spite of, but now that you are at this point, for the protection of yourself and your kids, get a restraining order in place.


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