# Facebook SUcks



## sunflower (Dec 15, 2008)

So I dont know why I do this to myself. BUT I am still friends with the Ex Best Friend and well she just looks so happy and has friends that I dont have and I get so depressssssssssed...... WHY do I do this does anyone else get this way.


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## Tanelornpete (Feb 2, 2010)

You do it because you get a payoff from it. You get to be miserable and feel all bad for yourself!


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

i agree with the thread title, i deactivated my brief account several months ago


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## tj71 (Jul 20, 2010)

I agree...facebook sucks. I F'n hate it!


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## DawnD (Sep 23, 2009)

Delete her. Problem solved. Stop worrying about who she has in her life and make sure you and your husband are still becoming closer and working on your marriage together.


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## Kitty's Affair (Aug 17, 2010)

It's hard to judge a person's happiness from their facebook. People sometimes use their profiles to create an image or persona of the person they'd like to be. The fact that her facebook page makes her look so delighted may be indicative of her trying to disguise what's really going on with her life. As you mentioned you two are no longer close and still she is your "facebook friend" so not everyone that's her friend is someone that she is actually friends with in real life. 
In a best case scenario she really is that happy and has a life full of friends. You should feel glad about that for her and decide what you can do to make yourself feel similarly.


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## Initfortheduration (Dec 12, 2008)

People have no idea yet, just how destructive facebook is to their careers and personal life. Sure you can get a lot of friends. But how many would be there when you need them. And let me tell you, there are psychologist employed by employers who will look at these computer logs and be able to tell whether this person or that is worth the risk of hiring. The less information on them the better. Mine has my picture and the game goodies everyone who has friended me sends. And thats it. If I want info to go out, I text or e-mail them.


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## yogachick (Aug 9, 2010)

My Facebook looks like "I have it all" because, at a glance, in real life or on FB, I do look like I have it all. People do not want to hear about my problems but they seem to want to "take me down a notch" due to envy. I'm not sure if I helped, but things aren't always as they seem. Focus on your own path and try to love everyone that has crossed your path <3


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## yogachick (Aug 9, 2010)

Tanelornpete said:


> You do it because you get a payoff from it. You get to be miserable and feel all bad for yourself!


How is being miserable and feeling bad something someone should or would desire? I'm seriously intersted in the explanation for this. You guys (affaircare) make sense most of the time but just a couple of things confuse me.


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## MrDude (Jun 21, 2010)

Yogachick, 
To kind of answer your question.

Why do some people cut themselves? Why do some people intentionally cause them self pain? When you have a bruise on your arm, why do you keep poking at it?


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## yogachick (Aug 9, 2010)

I don't know why people cut themselves or intentionally cause themselves pain. I have never poked at a bruise and if I had a bruise I would probably ignore it or put Arnica on it to help it go away faster.

I seriously do not get it but would like to get it.


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## mommy2 (Oct 27, 2009)

I can see how FB can be bad but I love my facebook! It brings me smiles and laughs when people post funny things their kids say, I get to see pics of their kids, vacations, weddings, etc. 

I post funny things my kids say and people comment how much they look forward to my posts becasue it always brings smile to their face! 

I guess I am in the minority!


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## Kitty's Affair (Aug 17, 2010)

Of all the horrible things in the world, I don't think Facebook ranks that high. Yogababe many people are very self destructive and cause themselves pain. Many people whether they realize it or not are more comfortable with pain than with happiness. 
I've dealt with self destructive habits my whole life. I used to smoke, drink too much, date losers and then one day I realized that I was doing all of these things to punish myself, because I didn't feel like I was as good/successful/attractive/etc as I should be.


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## yogachick (Aug 9, 2010)

mommy22 said:


> I think the intended message was people want attention. It's the whole reason the term "drama queen" was coined. Hope that makes sense, Yogachick.


"Yogababe many people are very self destructive and cause themselves pain. Many people whether they realize it or not are more comfortable with pain than with happiness. 
I've dealt with self destructive habits my whole life. I used to smoke, drink too much, date losers and then one day I realized that I was doing all of these things to punish myself, because I didn't feel like I was as good/successful/attractive/etc as I should be."

Thank you both for these explanations!!! Maybe I'm a little "slow on the uptake" but I do appreciate you taking the time : ) 

I'm thinking bottom line is to try our best to make those we love *feel worthy* of all life has to offer <3


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## Pit-of-my-stomach (Nov 2, 2010)

I agree and agreed well before I became convinced of my wife's EA.

It almost creates a total alternate reality for some people. 

I fear my wife literally lives in that alternate reality and her personality has changed incredibly since she has been addicted to that website.


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## mentallydrained (Oct 7, 2010)

Only way to get out of the 'fog' the facebook 'fog' is to cancel and not go on! I know...I've done it, am doing it. Facebook can be fun, a good connection to old friends. And why people continue to blame FB for their marriage issues is beyond me! FB doesn't 'make' you have EA and talk to the people the way you (wife) does or wants to be talked to. I had this discussion in counseling and as he said, before FB it was cell phones, texing (still is) and before that is was letters or secret meeting places. FB is NOT the cause of peoples marriage but an 'avenue of access' to have that social EA or meeting place that seem private, secretive, and unknown.

Once you 'friend' that one person that gives you the attention you need or desire, it snowballs from there. For me, my H hated I reconnected with friends (not male but actual girlfriends). It made me realize I wish I would have never stopped hanging out with people my age. I miss those connections. The girly chats, girls nite out that I never partaicipated in. I too was obsessed each night on til 11 or midnight after daughter went to bed. Just surfing pages and pages, seeing what everyone was doing, going, saying. Even IM those on same time discusse old times, how things are now, etc. After 23 years, I see H.S. girls still chatting and connecting like they did in school. That depresses me. I wish I had that connection. I never had it in school. I was always seriously dating someone and made that my life. Hence why I am struggling with my marriage. I've always made the boyfriend/relationship my priority and now I resent it..all of it. I feel I messed up my childhood/teenage years/H.S./College years by always having a serious boyfriend then to marriage.

All of these acquantences I will call them, since never truly hung out with them due to boyfriend situaitons, all of them keep in touch, go to the reunions, have wifes/husbands close in age spans, kids same age spans, and that is what I feel I 'messed' up on by not keeping with friendships and relationships my own age.

FB will make you feel mentally insane. It's tough. I've been off it for month now and I soooo want to resign but haven't. It is very addictive.


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