# Funny cheater story



## Augusto (Aug 14, 2013)

In the break room a bunch of the normals come in during lunch. I was reading to them what someone here was going through and how they caught their WS. This one lady then goes "well for me it was an accident. He sent me a bunch on lines of sexting texts." She went on to say at first she thought they were for her until he said...."are you going to wear that ****ty cop outfit that I like?" The whole time he did not pay attention who he was texting. She said she threw his stuff out on the lawn with a sign saying free from a cheating husband, divorced him and he moved to Florida a week after getting caught. Short but funny.


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## tech-novelist (May 15, 2014)

I love stories with happy endings!


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

Read earlier today that Iggy Azalea's fiancé (don't recall his name, but he's a pro basketball player) was outed as a serial cheat by one of his teammates.

HUGE surprise there, right?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

My friend, guy I'd known since Jr High, was on either his 2nd or 3rd marriage. I honestly can't remember, but pretty sure it was #2. Anyways, he had to have emergency surgery (nothing too serious, think it was his gallbladder) and outed himself to his wife while he was in recovery and still too out of it to know what he was saying and who he was talking to.


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

MJJEAN said:


> My friend, guy I'd known since Jr High, was on either his 2nd or 3rd marriage. I honestly can't remember, but pretty sure it was #2. Anyways, he had to have emergency surgery (nothing too serious, think it was his gallbladder) and outed himself to his wife while he was in recovery and still too out of it to know what he was saying and who he was talking to.


LOL. Reminds me of the scene from "Breaking Bad" in which Walt -- fresh out of surgery and still reeling from the after-effects of the anesthesia -- reveals to Skyler that he has not one but TWO cell phones.


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

GusPolinski said:


> LOL.  Reminds me of the scene from "Breaking Bad" in which Walt -- fresh out of surgery and still reeling from the after-effects of the anesthesia -- reveals to Skyler that he has not one but TWO cell phones.


M revealed a over a grand in...get this...phone sex lines he'd recently run up on the credit cards, the fact that he had been fired from his job 3 weeks prior and had been lying about going to work every day, and that he was screwing someone else. 

Apparently, he was incoherently blabbing and busted himself on the phone sex, then his wife started asking questions and he spilled all the rest. By the time he came fully around, she'd verified everything, called to tell pretty much everyone she'd ever known, and was filing for divorce.


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## joannacroc (Dec 17, 2014)

GusPolinski said:


> LOL. Reminds me of the scene from "Breaking Bad" in which Walt -- fresh out of surgery and still reeling from the after-effects of the anesthesia -- reveals to Skyler that he has not one but TWO cell phones.


There should really be more anasthesia-fueled cheater confessions. Wouldn't that make life so much more easier? Surgeries all round! Not to make light of a serious topic....


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

MJJEAN said:


> M revealed a over a grand in...get this...phone sex lines he'd recently run up on the credit cards, the fact that he had been fired from his job 3 weeks prior and had been lying about going to work every day, and that he was screwing someone else.
> 
> Apparently, he was incoherently blabbing and busted himself on the phone sex, then his wife started asking questions and he spilled all the rest. By the time he came fully around, she'd verified everything, called to tell pretty much everyone she'd ever known, and was filing for divorce.


Daaaaaaaaaamn...


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

joannacroc said:


> There should really be more anasthesia-fueled cheater confessions. Wouldn't that make life so much more easier? Surgeries all round! Not to make light of a serious topic....


Myself and most of my friends are 35 or older. We're at the age where things go wrong and need to be removed or repaired here and there. Every time someone I know has to have surgery, I think about M and chuckle. I may also occasionally suggest a spouse talk to their other half while they're still waking up...




GusPolinski said:


> Daaaaaaaaaamn...


M was an entertaining character. You should hear what he did in his first marriage! All 3 of his ex wives are friends and trade stories about shyte he pulled on them every time they get together with a few bottles of wine and some table top game or another. If you didn't know the people involved, you'd think they were making their M stories up, but he really was that...outlandish.

I always wondered about his 3rd wife... When his 1st wife called his 2nd wife and tried to warn her away from marrying him, I could understand 2nd wife's willingness to marry him anyways. It's easy to pass that kind of warning off as crazy ex trying to ruin the relationship. But 3rd wife had warnings from TWO previous wives. You'd think that would have been enough to convince her to run, but noooo.


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## Augusto (Aug 14, 2013)

This is a fun thread.....lol


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## LosingHim (Oct 20, 2015)

joannacroc said:


> There should really be more anasthesia-fueled cheater confessions. Wouldn't that make life so much more easier? Surgeries all round! Not to make light of a serious topic....


What's that stuff they give people to make them tell the truth when being interrogated? 

Maybe we should be suggesting that rather than polygraphs!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## honcho (Oct 5, 2013)

joannacroc said:


> There should really be more anasthesia-fueled cheater confessions. Wouldn't that make life so much more easier? Surgeries all round! Not to make light of a serious topic....


Many years ago when my crazy ex had surgery the doctor joked about asking her questions right after the operation. He said patients have a tendency to say the darnest things coming out if anesthesia.


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## Redactus (Nov 22, 2015)

LosingHim said:


> What's that stuff they give people to make them tell the truth when being interrogated?
> 
> Maybe we should be suggesting that rather than polygraphs!
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Uh, waterboarding?


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## HeartbrokenW (Sep 26, 2012)

Truth serum. 

Sent from my SM-N910V using Tapatalk


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## thenub (Oct 3, 2014)

Sodium pentathol


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## sidney2718 (Nov 2, 2013)

MJJEAN said:


> My friend, guy I'd known since Jr High, was on either his 2nd or 3rd marriage. I honestly can't remember, but pretty sure it was #2. Anyways, he had to have emergency surgery (nothing too serious, think it was his gallbladder) and outed himself to his wife while he was in recovery and still too out of it to know what he was saying and who he was talking to.


This must have been a while back. I had gall bladder surgery a few years ago. When I finally woke up, I had no after effects of the anesthetic and was ready to hop off the gurney and go home.

They kept me for 20 minutes and then kicked me out.

But we are all different. We need to add an appendix (removable) to the cheater's bible on being careful after surgery.


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## sidney2718 (Nov 2, 2013)

honcho said:


> Many years ago when my crazy ex had surgery the doctor joked about asking her questions right after the operation. He said patients have a tendency to say the darnest things coming out if anesthesia.


My cousin was like that. She'd say the darndest things after surgery, some quite insulting to the doctor. So her husband used to warn her surgeon before hand what might happen.

The doctor came by later to thank the husband. He did say that she may have some serious unresolved issues. Her husband said no, she told every doctor the same set of insults.


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

sidney2718 said:


> This must have been a while back. I had gall bladder surgery a few years ago. When I finally woke up, I had no after effects of the anesthetic and was ready to hop off the gurney and go home.
> 
> They kept me for 20 minutes and then kicked me out.
> 
> But we are all different. We need to add an appendix (removable) to the cheater's bible on being careful after surgery.


Let's see...it would have been between 2003 to 2004.


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

sidney2718 said:


> This must have been a while back. I had gall bladder surgery a few years ago. When I finally woke up, I had no after effects of the anesthetic and was ready to hop off the gurney and go home.
> 
> They kept me for 20 minutes and then kicked me out.
> 
> But we are all different. We need to add an appendix (removable) to the cheater's bible on being careful after surgery.


Another huge variable would be whether or not the surgery is done traditionally or laproscopically.


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## lostmyreligion (Oct 18, 2013)

honcho said:


> Many years ago when my crazy ex had surgery the doctor joked about asking her questions right after the operation. He said patients have a tendency to say the darnest things coming out if anesthesia.


I've been through at least a dozen surgeries and have been told on three occasions by the attending nurses that they had never heard anyone swear that continuously, inventively and foully coming out from under before. 

No idea what I said and they were unwilling to repeat it though one did tell me it started with asking if a rat had sh!t in my mouth and then went downhill from there.


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

lostmyreligion said:


> I've been through at least a dozen surgeries and have been told on three occasions by the attending nurses that they had never heard anyone swear that continuously, inventively and foully coming out from under before.
> 
> No idea what I said and they were unwilling to repeat it though one did tell me it started with asking if a rat had sh!t in my mouth and then went downhill from there.


I've had a couple of surgeries. Apparently I'm all the more hilarious when under the effects of anesthesia.


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