# YOUR woman in lingerie



## karma*girl

I read often how many guys here say they love it when their wives wear lingerie & wish they'd do it more often, etc..
Of course some don't care much about it at all- My husband has always fallen in the latter category.
He says it always winds up on the floor in 5 seconds anyway, so it's not necessary...but I might want to try it anyway.

My question is- what is it about YOUR woman in lingerie that is so appealing? I always imagine you guys, who say how awesome it is, having women with amazing bodies. Long legs, large breasts, flat, perfect stomachs, no cellulite, perfect skin, etc..which would explain why you like it- they look amazing in it, of course!
I think that's the only image I've ever seen of women in lingerie..always models, always pretty perfect looking. 

I'm pretty sure that's why I've never ventured into that area. 
I've had the ..'I don't look like that so I'm not worthy of wearing that kind of thing' attitude.

But I can't believe that every guy who likes it on his wife has a picture perfect woman, right!?
I'm trying to figure out how an average woman, like myself, can build the courage to pull of a corset & thigh highs with heels, etc..without thinking that HE'LL think WTH is she doing!?

I am curious to know what is it about YOUR woman in lingerie vs. every other woman you've seen in VS, or porn, or whatever, that makes you like it on (specifically) HER? 

Thanks! ( :
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Tall Average Guy

I know it makes my wife feel sexier. It feels good against her skin, hides some areas that bother her and pushes somethings back to where she wants them. When she is feeling sexier, she is much more confident with me in bed. That makes for a better experience for both of us.

But even with that, I find my wife hot. Yes, she does not fit the mold of a covergirl, but that does not mean she is not beautiful. She certainly gets my motor running. And when she puts on lingerie, she is accenting that hotness and communicating that we are going to have a lot of fun.


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## Fozzy

It's a signal that she's into the moment. She's putting in the effort to try to look seductive. It's more of an active role in the whole process which I for one appreciate.


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## xakulax

Deepens what type of lingerie are we talking about Frederick's Of Hollywood, Victoria's Secret ,Trashy.com or the Walmart special ?


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## karma*girl

Well, how would you feel seeing her in each? Classy & trashy?

I go for classy..but would mix it up for the fun of it...that is, once I decide to actually put it on! 

Thanks for the input, guys!
I feel like it's more about her showing that she's up for a good time, not so much the lingerie itself, that you like...
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Fozzy

karma*girl said:


> Well, how would you feel seeing her in each? Classy & trashy?
> 
> I go for classy..but would mix it up for the fun of it...that is, once I decide to actually put it on!
> 
> Thanks for the input, guys!
> I feel like it's more about her showing that she's up for a good time, not so much the lingerie itself, that you like...
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Exactly.


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## karma*girl

So if that's the case, me jumping him, wearing underwear & a tank top should have the same effect, right?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Thound

I know its not on for very long, but wrapping paper isnt on a gift very long either. Could you imagine getting a Christmas gift unwrapped? Half of the fun is unwrapping it.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## karma*girl

...it's fun even if it doesn't look great underneath?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Fozzy

karma*girl said:


> ...it's fun even if it doesn't look great underneath?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Don't expect it to look good to you. It's not FOR you. Like cooking something you hate for someone else who loves it. Take pride in giving them something THEY love.


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## NobodySpecial

My husband likes that it demonstrates enthusiasm and interest and makes me feel sexy.


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## xakulax

Well in that case Classy = romantic trashy = right now!!! lol personally I prefer both there great way's for setting the mood and IMO both are necessary for good relationship.


Keep in mind its not just the lingerie that matters the attitude has to be there too other wise you get beautiful woman in a naughty nurse outfit who rather be watching T.V. The attitude is a big factor in setting the mood I don't care if she wearing sweatpants if my girl give me the sign then its go time!!!


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## Married but Happy

This thread would be better with pictures!


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## JCD

A Case for Lingerie

1) It covers and supports what needs to be covered and supported, while revealing that which can safely be revealed.

2) It shows willing

- She had to shop for it

-She had to spend money on it

-She had to have the courage to try it

-And she had to make a little 'display', in her eyes perhaps shedding a little dignity to make me hotter...

...just for me. It's like a blow job for the eyes. She gets nothing out of it, but is making a LARGE effort to please me. Even stuff that isn't 'my style' deserves MAJOR props from me just for the effort.

3) If the 'present' inside the wrapping isn't 'up to snuff', it is a visual decoration in it's own right.

4) It indicates a sexually liberated nature which encourages him to some new and daring things...some of which you might like. 

5) It makes him more open to suggestion for things YOU might like in the bedroom (hint: no strapons)

6) It is 'relationship currency'. Suddenly, after a night where you pretend to be Kiera Knightly, he suddenly goes to your mother's house with a smile on his face and a song in his heart...and you think there is no relationship to these two incidents?

7) If the loving in the bedroom has slacked off, what does it hurt to TRY something different? Trying NOTHING different isn't working...

Just a caution. Do NOT ambush him by spending 2 hours getting ready for sex...right before he settles in for the night...or the big game starts...or he is coming off a 12 hour shift.

In this case, foreplay is DEFINITELY needed (and I am talking a few HOURS of mental prep) to avoid wasting effort or hurting feelings.


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## anchorwatch

karma*girl,

For effect, we're a healthy couple who just moved into our sixties. So take that as we take care of ourselves but at sixty, we're not sports illustrated models. (never were either, lol). She wears lingerie (it doesn't have to come off) that let's her feel sexy and attractive, and I still get plenty aroused at that effort and whats under it, after all these years...


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## Wolf1974

I think my GF would look wonderful in it but sadly has not put any on yet.


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## lovelygirl

Wolf1974 said:


> I think my GF would look wonderful in it but sadly has not put any on yet.


Kind of strange considering you're in a relationship with her.
Is she THAT shy?


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## karma*girl

I've been with my husband for 20 years..it is possible to be that shy or in my case, that unsure about wearing it, no matter how long you've been together..as crappy as that seems.
It has more to do with the relationship I have with myself rather than my relationship with him. 

Wolf- it's been about 18 years since I've worn anything lingerie-ish..basically before kids. 
After what pregnancy did to my body, I honestly never felt good enough for it. 
Maybe that's how she feels? 
Sometimes we really would love to try things or pull certain things off, but don't think it's possible without major embarrassment, so just avoid it altogether.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## I got this

If you are wearing it for him ask him to pick something out with you. If you are wearing ir for you, wear what makes you feel sexy not self-conscious. 

Im not a big fan of your calling yourself average and defining a hot woman as one that needs a sandwich. 

There are many shapes of woman that are sexy. There are what you call imperfections that are sexy. Who even defines perfect? Clearly the definitions vary. 

Step back and think over your definition and see of your husband agree. 

Five carpenters I know very well travel together to work every day. One is a boob man, another an ass man, one likes em skinny another likes em thick another likes them ****ty in any shape at all. The thick lover also like the librarian look. Another boob man likes brunettes, The ass man blonds. 

Stop please and think about your beliefs. They way off. 

Ask your husband what he likes and do that if you can. If not get as close as possible or go with what makes you feel sexy.

If you are lucky they are the same.


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## Fozzy

If you're not comfortable with lingerie, try picking out something you ARE comfortable in (not sweats, dear god, not sweats) and make it your sex outfit. You mentioned a tshirt and shorts earlier. Find a set that's easily identifiable, and make it clear to him that when he see's you in it, game on. Make sure that you keep the outfit JUST for that though. If he sees you cleaning house in that shirt later on, it's going to lose it's potency.


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## FizzBomb

karma*girl said:


> I've been with my husband for 20 years..it is possible to be that shy or in my case, that unsure about wearing it, no matter how long you've been together..as crappy as that seems.
> It has more to do with the relationship I have with myself rather than my relationship with him.
> 
> Wolf- it's been about 18 years since I've worn anything lingerie-ish..basically before kids.
> After what pregnancy did to my body, I honestly never felt good enough for it.
> Maybe that's how she feels?
> Sometimes we really would love to try things or pull certain things off, but don't think it's possible without major embarrassment, so just avoid it altogether.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Karma*girl, I hope you don't mind me butting in here. 
What does your husband like to see you in? Have a chat and go from there. What would be even sexier, is to go and browse through some of the online Sex Shops/Lingerie Shops together and select a few items. He will love what ever effort you go to for him. Grab a couple of pairs of those sexy sky high heels - they push your tits and bum out in a sexy way. May as we'll grab a set of nipple clamps too while you're at it :lol:

I buy all my own lingerie. Hubs is just 'meh' about it. He says 'you've got a great body.' I wear lingerie a lot. The ****tier the better. I wear it for myself and him. It makes me feel even hornier when I've got it on.

I think you will be pleasantly surprised when you're all decked out.


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## alexm

As has already been said here, lingerie is more the signal that you're up for it, and ready to please. And if you makes you feel sexier, then that's even better!

My wife is not a lingerie wearer, though she does have some. It comes out a couple of times a year, just enough to not be boring.

To her, she doesn't like it, it doesn't make her feel sexy, but she has bad body image issues (don't we all?)

Funny story - I like it when she wears it, so she made me a deal. She bought me some sexy (?) underwear, the kind that accentuates my manhood. (they're not a thong, don't worry) I think I look ridiculous in them, but it oddly FEELS sexy when I do wear them. She laughed the first time I put them on. But they come out every now and again, and it's now sexy (ish) when I do wear them. Tit for tat.


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## alexm

karma*girl said:


> After what pregnancy did to my body, I honestly never felt good enough for it. _Posted via Mobile Device_


oh man, don't feel that pregnancy ruined your body! Wear it like a badge of honor. Most women's bodies won't go back to the pre-pregnancy days, and that's okay.

Sexy is an attitude, not your body or your clothes. I haven't been with an inordinate number of women in my life, but I have been with some who had "great" bodies but were insecure - and that was totally unsexy. One girl I dated, I never saw her breasts, not even once. Not even her bra. The shirt stayed on at all times. A couple of other women were on the chubby side, or had had children, or were disproportionate etc. but they owned their bodies and didn't think twice. My ex wife was barely 100lbs at the end, and she hated her body without clothes on. I once had a thing with a woman who weighed a good 90lbs more than me, and it was some of the best sex I've ever had. Why? Because she owned that body. THAT'S sexy.

Most guys could care less about the woman's body, especially if they've already married them  As long as you both show confidence in the bedroom, all is good.

Think about it - how sexy would it be if the guy you were dating always left his shirt on, or always made comments about how he didn't think you'd like whatever he was insecure about? Or always mentioned that he thought his penis was too small? Not very sexy, is it?

Own your body, because you ARE sexy. ALL women can be sexy.


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## Wolf1974

lovelygirl said:


> Kind of strange considering you're in a relationship with her.
> Is she THAT shy?


Nope just still the new phase so by the time we can get to be with one another things come off really fast the first time. Guess I could by her some for round two


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## Wolf1974

karma*girl said:


> I've been with my husband for 20 years..it is possible to be that shy or in my case, that unsure about wearing it, no matter how long you've been together..as crappy as that seems.
> It has more to do with the relationship I have with myself rather than my relationship with him.
> 
> Wolf- it's been about 18 years since I've worn anything lingerie-ish..basically before kids.
> After what pregnancy did to my body, I honestly never felt good enough for it.
> Maybe that's how she feels?
> Sometimes we really would love to try things or pull certain things off, but don't think it's possible without major embarrassment, so just avoid it altogether.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Oh no not it at all. To look at her you would never be able to tell she even had a child. I sure we will get to it as some point Maybe we should go shopping together. That could be fun

I can appreciate what your saying though pregnancy can play hell on a woman's body I have seen.


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## Machiavelli

I'm old enough to remember The Time Before Pantyhose. All girls wore lingerie (garter and stockings) everyday. And Cokes were the old formula (not that phony "classic").


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## rush

My wife rarely wears lingerie for me, too shy or whatever. She has a few times at my urging her into it and she looks awesome. I even made some for her once, kind easily ripped off her, that was great!


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## heartsbeating

I would love for you to go to a burlesque show... to see all different shapes and sizes of women and recognize how sensual and sexy various body types can be. Note the attitude they exude - confident, fun and sassy - and how the audience responds in support and celebration.

My husband likes lingerie on me. He also digs when I wear nothing but a smile. Or just a fitted t-shirt and undies... I don't have a perfect body. He's told me before that he digs when I feel confident within myself. He finds that sexy. I don't expect myself to look like a lingerie model and I have my moments of insecurities same as the next person. But I work with, and as much as possible embrace, what I've got. Recently I've been enjoying strength-training for health, appearance, mindset, and all that good stuff. I dig feeling my hamstring muscles (they exist!) develop and recognize that I'm becoming stronger week by week. It contributes to my mind-set of how I feel about myself overall. 

I have a friend who is stunningly gorgeous, has a huge heart, an amazing figure, has children and yet, is so down on her appearance. If only she saw herself the way most of us see her. All I can suggest is, as hard as it may be, try to re-frame your thoughts about your body. Wear what you feel comfortable and sexy in.


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## NewHubs

My wife will wear a tight fitting white camisole top with thong panties. Seeing her in this is enough for me!

Simple = Sexy
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Chumpless

Lingerie, you mean the pasta?


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## sparkyjim

My wife never has to buy lingerie. I see something I like I buy it for her. And she loves wearing it for me.

I like it for the look and the feel - as far as that goes I stay away from lace because that can be very scratchy. There is no fun in having your wife in your lap abrading away at your johnson...

I agree with thound...it is all about wrapping up the gift...


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## ocotillo

I get loopy when she's in an ultra-short kimono style robe. --Can't even begin to explain why.


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## WorkingOnMe

Machiavelli said:


> I'm old enough to remember The Time Before Pantyhose. All girls wore lingerie (garter and stockings) everyday. And Cokes were the old formula (not that phony "classic").


My wife knows I love lingerie. As you say, garter and stocking. 99.9% of the time she wears a ratty t-shirt to bed. Either with or without panties. Without is supposed to be my hint. Anyway, since she knows I love stockings, once in a great while she will wear them to bed and then do her best to hide from me. What she doesn't get, at all, is that what I find sexy about them is the idea that we're going out, her in a dress with those things underneath, and then unwrapping the package when we get home. Finding them on her in bed is ok I guess, but not really the point.


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## committed4ever

I personally LOVE wearing lingerie and spike heels. TBH, I don't know if I do it for H or me, because it's usually off in 10 seconds or less. But he seems to love the 10 seconds anyway, so I chug along. Haven't put it on since I was pregnant and had a wardrobe/walking-in spike-heels-at-7-months-pregnant malfunction.


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## Catherine602

I love the s!utty net or lace body suits with heels. I don't know if this belongs in the lingerie thread. They're too trashy?


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## GettingIt_2

WorkingOnMe said:


> My wife knows I love lingerie. As you say, garter and stocking. 99.9% of the time she wears a ratty t-shirt to bed. Either with or without panties. Without is supposed to be my hint. Anyway, since she knows I love stockings, once in a great while she will wear them to bed and then do her best to hide from me. *What she doesn't get, at all, is that what I find sexy about them is the idea that we're going out, her in a dress with those things underneath, and then unwrapping the package when we get home. Finding them on her in bed is ok I guess, but not really the point.*


Did you tell her this? Would she wear them out on a date? I think my h is the same way; wearing lingerie to bed is a sorta too little, too late.


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## GettingIt_2

committed4ever said:


> Haven't put it on since I was pregnant and had a wardrobe/walking-in spike-heels-at-7-months-pregnant malfunction.


:nono:


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## Catherine602

How is the baby Committed? Get back in those heels gurl.  A little practice and you'll be good to go.


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## WorkingOnMe

GettingIt said:


> Did you tell her this? Would she wear them out on a date? I think my h is the same way; wearing lingerie to bed is a sorta too little, too late.


Yes, I've told her this many times. No way in hell will she wear anything remotely sexy outside the bedroom. Seriously, not even the living room with the kids all gone. She wore lingerie once in a hotel room. On our 20th anniversary after I bought it for her and insisted she wear it.


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## FizzBomb

WorkingOnMe said:


> What she doesn't get, at all, is that what I find sexy about them is the idea that we're going out, her in a dress with those things underneath, and then unwrapping the package when we get home.


Working, I really like the idea of going out wearing sexy lingerie. Even better if my husband suggests what to wear underneath. My husband is a bit 'meh' or 'whatev's' about ideas like this. Unenthused would be a better word. I am much more of a lingerie lover than he.


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## mineforever

Lingerie at my house is for me...I enjoy wearing it always have. Hubs not really his thing. He prefers me with nothing on...to him me coming out all natural and climbing in his lap (stadling him) is what turns his crank. Its attitude more than anything for him. He would prefer his package unwrapped, assembled and ready to play with.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## I Notice The Details

I think lingerie on my wife peeks my curiosity. Her body is gorgeous, but even more provocative with a wispy, colorful pair of panties covering her triangle...keeping it from my view. When she walks around the house in a short t-shirt and panties, I have to stop what I am doing and watch her...and eventually get my hands on her. I admit, men are visual, and when she covers up her "details" with something sexy, I want to see them even more.

I really appreciate when she wears lingerie for herself...because it makes her feel special. Something silky and soft. When we are at dinner during date night and she whispers that she is wearing her thinnest, sheer bra...and that it feels good...it is a turn on! When I see her get out of the car with panty hose on and I know they are special thigh highs that I purchased for her....I know she is thinking about something sexy, and enjoying it. 

Wearing lingerie makes me feel that my wife appreciates her own body...and appreciates my likes too. I remember being super stressed from work one day, and sitting down to watch TV to relax. She just happened to decide to vacuum the family room minutes later...with a red, stretchy teddy on and black high heels. I couldn't take my eyes off of her, and it was the best distraction ever..at the perfect time. 

I also say that many people like to unwrap presents. I like to unwrap her body....slowly...savoring the sexy views by admiring, touching, teasing...and finally peeling off lingerie from her body when she is super turned on and ready to jump on top of me. Nude is nude. We all see that daily. I think sexy lingerie adds spice and color to a sex life. Just my opinion.


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## johnAdams

karma*girl said:


> I am curious to know what is it about YOUR woman in lingerie vs. every other woman you've seen in VS, or porn, or whatever, that makes you like it on (specifically) HER?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I love my wife in lingerie. She has a whole closet full of nothing but lingerie. She will often dress in her lingerie and walk down the steps and I cannot take my eyes off of her. I just think she looks beautiful and sexy. She enjoys knowing that I enjoy it.

She also looks wonderful in dresses. She wears dresses almost exclusively, which is rare for women anymore. She is also a shoe person. She always looks great.

I think to us, lingerie adds another element to foreplay. It is absolutely eye candy. Men are turned on by sight, so her taking the effort to dress in sexy lingerie is very much appreciated by me. As others have said, yes the lingerie comes off pretty quickly, but it was so worth the effort.

The reason I like it specifically on her is that the lingerie is on the woman I love and that makes all the difference in the world.


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## Refuse to be played

Personally I prefer her wearing bodystockings, I just love ripping them apart. She doesn't wear lingerie often and would be pissed if I went to town on the few pieces she does have.


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## ChargingCharlie

My wife never wears any, but an old MILF girlfriend would get dressed up in a nice dress and pantyhose to go out, and one time when we got back, I stopped her in the bedroom before she got undressed and rubbed her crotch through her pantyhose. She was ready to get it on but I was mean and told her she had to wait until I was done (one hand rubbing her crotch, the other fondling her D-cup boobs through her dress). Needless to say, we probably caused global warming with the heat in her bedroom. Man, that was hot.


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## joe kidd

All of hers has been thrown out. She wore it for OM and its never been replaced.


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## WorkingOnMe

joe kidd said:


> All of hers has been thrown out. She wore it for OM and its never been replaced.


If she only put out 8 times last year it sounds like it's not needed anyway. I feel you Joe, it must be very frustrating after all that's happened.


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## treyvion

joe kidd said:


> All of hers has been thrown out. She wore it for OM and its never been replaced.


Well it shows you who is most important, but i wouldn't want those skanky outfits back after the modelled them for the other guy.


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## soccermom2three

Is it weird that my husband has never given me lingerie? In almost 32 years of dating and marriage?

Once in a while I wear one of his old t-shirts that he's given me but I usually wear a little nighty or a cami with shorts. I can't wear anything on my legs, it's too hot.


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## CuddleBug

karma*girl said:


> I read often how many guys here say they love it when their wives wear lingerie & wish they'd do it more often, etc..
> Of course some don't care much about it at all- My husband has always fallen in the latter category.
> He says it always winds up on the floor in 5 seconds anyway, so it's not necessary...but I might want to try it anyway.
> 
> My question is- what is it about YOUR woman in lingerie that is so appealing? I always imagine you guys, who say how awesome it is, having women with amazing bodies. Long legs, large breasts, flat, perfect stomachs, no cellulite, perfect skin, etc..which would explain why you like it- they look amazing in it, of course!
> I think that's the only image I've ever seen of women in lingerie..always models, always pretty perfect looking.
> 
> I'm pretty sure that's why I've never ventured into that area.
> I've had the ..'I don't look like that so I'm not worthy of wearing that kind of thing' attitude.
> 
> But I can't believe that every guy who likes it on his wife has a picture perfect woman, right!?
> I'm trying to figure out how an average woman, like myself, can build the courage to pull of a corset & thigh highs with heels, etc..without thinking that HE'LL think WTH is she doing!?
> 
> I am curious to know what is it about YOUR woman in lingerie vs. every other woman you've seen in VS, or porn, or whatever, that makes you like it on (specifically) HER?
> 
> Thanks! ( :
> _Posted via Mobile Device_



My wifee was a larger woman most of her life due to her lifestyles choices, not eating right, or correct amounts and no exercises. She never wore anything sexy ever!!! Now she finally got it over the last 4.5+ months, has lost 45 lbs and is still loosing more weight, and for the first time, has bought a few sexy panties and many new sexier clothes. I LIKE!!!:smthumbup:

I don't care what weight she is after all her weight loss. The number means nothing to me. It's is she in shape, lost as much as she can healthily, and feels great, that's more important to me. The ladies in porn are usually very fit and hot, models?, movie star wanna bee's, and can wear those very sexy outfits and have that wild crazy sex without feeling insecure because they are in fantastic shape. Plus they get paid extremely well and you could say, they stay very fit and sexy as part of their jobs.

Who here would stay in extremely great shape if you got paid huge amounts of money for a few hours work here and there?


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## ChargingCharlie

CuddleBug said:


> My wifee was a larger woman most of her life due to her lifestyles choices, not eating right, or correct amounts and no exercises. She never wore anything sexy ever!!! Now she finally got it over the last 4.5+ months, has lost 45 lbs and is still loosing more weight, and for the first time, has bought a few sexy panties and many new sexier clothes. I LIKE!!!:smthumbup:
> 
> I don't care what weight she is after all her weight loss. The number means nothing to me. It's is she in shape, lost as much as she can healthily, and feels great, that's more important to me. The ladies in porn are usually very fit and hot, models?, movie star wanna bee's, and can wear those very sexy outfits and have that wild crazy sex without feeling insecure because they are in fantastic shape. Plus they get paid extremely well and you could say, they stay very fit and sexy as part of their jobs.
> 
> Who here would stay in extremely great shape if you got paid huge amounts of money for a few hours work here and there?


The hot and sexy women on TV, porn, movies, etc. don't do it for me. Hell, we have some female friends that are very attractive women with great bodies, and somehow don't get me turned on. However, my wife's friend, who is fairly attractive but not hot, and doesn't have a great body besides the fact that she's well-endowed (she's not fat by any means, but could lose a few pounds) I find very sexually appealing. Mainly this is due to the fact that I know she's very into sex, and doesn't have any inhibitions when it comes to sex.


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## I Notice The Details

soccermom2three said:


> Is it weird that my husband has never given me lingerie? In almost 32 years of dating and marriage?
> 
> Once in a while I wear one of his old t-shirts that he's given me but I usually wear a little nighty or a cami with shorts. I can't wear anything on my legs, it's too hot.


Soccermom2three

What would he say if you asked: "Honey, is there any lingerie that you would like for me to model and wear for you? You can order it online with free shipping and free returns." I think he would jump at the chance to buy you something sexy if you initiated this conversation... Surprise him. Get him to spice things up. 

I do find it strange that he has never bought you any lingerie....most of my wife's extensive collection was purchased by me over the years. Her favorite high heels were all picked out by me as well. I know what looks great on her body. She appreciates that.


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## WorkingOnMe

soccermom2three said:


> Is it weird that my husband has never given me lingerie? In almost 32 years of dating and marriage?
> 
> Once in a while I wear one of his old t-shirts that he's given me but I usually wear a little nighty or a cami with shorts. I can't wear anything on my legs, it's too hot.



I never bought mine any until our 20th. She never seemed open to it and even when I did I had to insist pretty forcefully to get her to wear it. I suspect if you started wearing it, he would start buying and picking it out. But he won't if he thinks it's a waste of time since you don't wear it anyway.


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## CharlieParker

I Notice The Details said:


> Soccermom2three
> 
> What would he say if you asked: "Honey, is there any lingerie that you would like for me to model and wear for you? You can order it online with free shipping and free returns."


sm2t, 32 years? Sweet. Do this. 

k*g, could you do this too? Deep breath, he is gonna love it. I promise.


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## CharlieParker

Mrs. John Adams said:


> I buy my own lingerie details...I would not want my beautiful hubby to buy it for me. I buy my own shoes...my own underwear, my own clothes....no no no...I don't want him to buy my stuff.


I used to go to local lingerie shoppe because they knew her (she went herself too) and knew her sizes. The ladies could alway$ $ee me coming 

After we quit smoking and she gained weight she wasn't comfortable anymore. We moved 6 years ago and I didn't know we had a local shoppe here. She went for the first time a couple of weeks ago (she's been trying hard to up the sexy). Not sure if I'm going to go with her or not.


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## Fozzy

soccermom2three said:


> Is it weird that my husband has never given me lingerie? In almost 32 years of dating and marriage?
> 
> Once in a while I wear one of his old t-shirts that he's given me but I usually wear a little nighty or a cami with shorts. I can't wear anything on my legs, it's too hot.


I took my wife to Fredericks one time several years back. Bought her a couple hundred worth of different panties, etc. VERY much looking forward to seeing those for their intended purpose (it's FREDERICKS after all). Didn't happen. I'd keep finding them in the laundry after she'd wear them to work. Eventually they were ratty from use and got thrown out.

I've point blank told her I will never buy her lingerie again.


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## WorkingOnMe

Fozzy said:


> I took my wife to Fredericks one time several years back. Bought her a couple hundred worth of different panties, etc. VERY much looking forward to seeing those for their intended purpose (it's FREDERICKS after all). Didn't happen. I'd keep finding them in the laundry after she'd wear them to work. Eventually they were ratty from use and got thrown out.
> 
> I've point blank told her I will never buy her lingerie again.


Not THAT sucks. Ouch.


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## treyvion

Fozzy said:


> I took my wife to Fredericks one time several years back. Bought her a couple hundred worth of different panties, etc. VERY much looking forward to seeing those for their intended purpose (it's FREDERICKS after all). Didn't happen. I'd keep finding them in the laundry after she'd wear them to work. Eventually they were ratty from use and got thrown out.
> 
> I've point blank told her I will never buy her lingerie again.


Yeah those Fredricks will wear out quickly. My question to you is, do you think she had some people in "single land" she was impressing with your great underwear selection, because it surely wasn't you...

I'm not trying to slap you in the face either.


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## Fozzy

treyvion said:


> Yeah those Fredricks will wear out quickly. My question to you is, do you think she had some people in "single land" she was impressing with your great underwear selection, because it surely wasn't you...
> 
> I'm not trying to slap you in the face either.


Nope, I'd actually see her putting them on in the morning before work, and coming home in them. After a while they were not in any condition to be turning ANYONE on.


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## SimplyAmorous

My husband has never cared, he's never bought me any in all our years together..

I got a little mad at him a few yrs back when "I notice the Details" came on here with his Panties story.... asking him why in the world he never bought me anything like that..he had 2 excuses... when would he have time to shop -I'm always with him...and it's coming off anyway -I don't need it...Ok sweet..

But really... I had my head up by butt ...I wasn't thinking "sexy" enough ...so he could have turned up the heat a little...with a surprise package.. (could have shopped on the net)

I did have a few things and I recall when I was feeling REALLY HOT....I would put these on..it's like I wanted to set the stage for seducing or something.... of course he loved it -I was coming after him!

Somehow I just never got into Lingerie... until 5 yrs ago.. then I went on a KICK and was buying all kinds of things ...left & right... on Ebay...oh it was hit or miss. but it was so much FUN... it upped my confidence -getting older It just made me feel good...I was having a ball ...the French Maid, the Naughty Nurse, Tarzan woman...the garters...all of it.. I'd take these on vacations.. cook breakfast for for him in heels..we'd do pictures....

It surely added some Ommmph ..for how I felt about myself and my effect on him..... I think I was making up for lost years... This has toned down some... a nice reminder to not let it slip..


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## Holland

OK so I don't have the best body in the world but when Mr H see me in lingerie I feel so sexy. We go to bed naked every night and most of the time I don't wear undies during the day so for him it is a real treat when I do wear lingerie. I love the look on his face when he see it.

Tonight I plan on greeting him at the door with a pretty dress on, some sexy lingerie underneath and a pair of 5" red heels. All day I will be thinking about it, the thrill for me is the thought of his response when he sees me.


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## WorkingOnMe

SimplyAmorous said:


> until 5 yrs ago.. then I went on a KICK and was buying all kinds of things ...left & right... on Ebay...oh it was hit or miss. but it was so much FUN... it upped my confidence -getting older It just made me feel good...I was having a ball ...the French Maid, the Naughty Nurse, Tarzan woman...the garters...all of it.. I'd take these on vacations.. cook breakfast for for him in heels..we'd do pictures....


Sigh....


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## jld

Holland said:


> *OK so I don't have the best body in the world *but when Mr H see me in lingerie I feel so sexy. We go to bed naked every night and most of the time I don't wear undies during the day so for him it is a real treat when I do wear lingerie. I love the look on his face when he see it.
> 
> Tonight I plan on greeting him at the door with a pretty dress on, some sexy lingerie underneath and a pair of 5" red heels. All day I will be thinking about it, the thrill for me is the thought of his response when he sees me.


I bet your husband thinks you do.


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## Holland

And that was the point JLD  

I long ago stopped worrying about the perfect bodies in porn, movies etc. In my past life with a LD husband I got all screwed up with body image issues.
In my current life, the man that loves me simply cannot get enough of my body, it is sexy as hell and I feel empowered regardless of my imperfections.


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## omgitselaine

We've spent hundreds of dollars ( perhaps more  ) ....... him buying for me and me buying for myself but obviously for him ahem ahem. 

Each and every penny has been worth it IMHO and I am sure Joe would agree to this  !!!

It makes me feel girlie and sexy for him ....... and well we know what it does for Joe


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## karma*girl

Holland- I am in love with your last line^ You give me hope: )
That's where I am headed in my journey for physical self acceptance. 

My biggest fear (and what holds me back) is that I'll put something on that I think looks pretty sexy & then he will (mentally) compare me to every other woman he's seen in a similar outfit. 
(I know to a lot of you that seems silly, but I might as well be honest.)
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Jamestone

Dont think like that karma. If you have the right attitude on when you wear the outfit you will not have anything to worry about but cleaning up afterwards. A man who is in love with his partner only needs to feel she is "feeling" for him to have a great time. No matter your appearence and what you may be working on to improve. Show him what you have with a smile and grin and you will be the winner in the end.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## jld

karma*girl said:


> Holland- I am in love with your last line^ You give me hope: )
> That's where I am headed in my journey for physical self acceptance.
> 
> My biggest fear (and what holds me back) is that I'll put something on that I think looks pretty sexy & then he will (mentally) compare me to every other woman he's seen in a similar outfit.
> (I know to a lot of you that seems silly, but I might as well be honest.)
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I think it is always good to be honest. 

Has he ever told you that he compares you to other women? 

SA recommended a book recently, I think called Vulnerability, and I flipped through it recently. I need to get it again from the library, and read the whole thing, because the little bit I read was really good. The part was where some young women were talking about how insecure they felt about their bodies, and a young man actually got upset and told them that it was not how their bodies looked, but how the women felt in their bodies that was so appealing to men. The women were stunned. 

Dh is always telling me how much he loves my body, and for 21 years I have not believed him. Oh, I like hearing what he says, but I don't look like the models at all, so in my mind, my body is just . . . wrong. 

Dh totally disagrees, and is really working on changing my mindset. Maybe he is making some headway, lol. But what an uphill battle. Conditioning is so strong.


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## karma*girl

James..thank you, that's so encouraging( :
Sometimes a glass of wine is all it takes to relax me enough to not over-think about what he is thinking...but I really want to do that naturally!
I don't want him to think I need to be buzzed in order to have a good time with him. : /
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Holland

KarmaG and JLD for me personally the real telling is in the expression on their face, the look in their eyes. Mr H looks like he just won lotto when he sees me in lingerie. No words in the world could convince me I am sexy, it is the look he gives me.

Wear lingerie with confidence, you are with a man that loves you, all of you


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## samyeagar

Holland said:


> OK so I don't have the best body in the world but when Mr H see me in lingerie I feel so sexy. We go to bed naked every night and most of the time I don't wear undies during the day so for him it is a real treat when I do wear lingerie. I love the look on his face when he see it.
> 
> Tonight I plan on greeting him at the door with a pretty dress on, some sexy lingerie underneath and a pair of 5" red heels. All day I will be thinking about it, the thrill for me is the thought of his response when he sees me.


Similar here. So many of the things that are being suggested as sexy way of doing things, she already does as a matter of course as opposed to something special. Hell, virtually every time we go out to dinner, by the time we are ready to leave, she'll make sure I see the panties I watched her put on earlier are now in her purse. Yes, she's even done that once or twice in church too.

For us, the default position is game on, so even if she's been wearing sweats around the house all day, has been yawning, complaining about a headache, it's a safe bet she'll be naked when we get into bed and we're having sex.

All the undies she as, I have bought. She pretty much only wears thongs, and certainly prefers them to anything else, but I have gotten her a couple pairs of boy shorts that her ass makes look absolutely exquisite.

As far as lingerie goes, she has some, and will wear it very occasionally but more just to do something different than to send any signal like she is more in the mood than normal or trying to seduce me or anything. It is more something just for variety than spicing it up.


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## Jamestone

Jld, your hubby is dead on. I dont know why women dont believe their closest friend and husbands on this one. My wife is the same way as you. But I can promise you that if i have a choice between a woman who owns her body and has he right mindset of not holding back because of her insecuritites, i will take that every time over the pefect model body who is insecure with whatever. Its such a turn off no sexy body can overcome. Just once I would like my wife to put all that nevative energy and thoughts into getting totally lost with me and she would never worry again.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## omgitselaine

I actually have nooo problem with my husband comparing me to " other " women because when he sees me in my teddy , thongs , high heels and that " look " on my face .................. I know he'll think of the other women and understands how lucky he is to have me dressed this way in front of him.

Its all about confidence and attitude


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## karma*girl

Wow, jld, that totally speaks to me! I'm going to have get that book for sure. 

For the guys that say it's how we feel in our bodies that is most important, I can understand that, but it's like a catch 22 for us. 
How can we feel confident & sure about ourselves when everything around us tells us there is something wrong with us. 

I know we shouldn't let outside influences affect us but it's very, very difficult.
My husband has never said anything in terms if comparing me, but I've seen the porn he's looked at & I'm opposite of the one girl he looked up more than once.

The conditioning is hard core, I agree completely.
Thank you again for the book suggestion..I'm going to look it up on my Nook( :
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Jamestone

Of course when we compare to someone who we think has better qualities we will always come up on the short end of the stick. But think about this. Odds are your hubby cant compete physically with the men in those pornos either. We guys mostly all come up way short of men in porn. But it does not stop us from flaunting what we do have and coming after you like we could not be more excited to show you what our assets can do for and too you. Men need to learn to be more like women and be emotional and connect with women, women need to learn to be more like men and act like you have everything we need to make us happy. I challenge you to find the sexiest outfit you can put togeher and for one night dont even look in the mirror. But chase after him in your outfit and act like us idiot guys act when we are horn dogs and trying to get in your pants. Have fun with it and remember you are about to rock his world! Just try it and tell me t was not an incredble feeling to let go of those i securities for one night.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## treyvion

Jamestone said:


> Of course when we compare to someone who we think has better qualities we will always come up on the short end of the stick. But think about this. Odds are your hubby cant compete physically with the men in those pornos either. We guys mostly all come up way short of men in porn. But it does not stop us from flaunting what we do have and coming after you like we could not be more excited to show you what our assets can do for and too you. Men need to learn to be more like women and be emotional and connect with women, women need to learn to be more like men and act like you have everything we need to make us happy. I challenge you to find the sexiest outfit you can put togeher and for one night dont even look in the mirror. But chase after him in your outfit and act like us idiot guys act when we are horn dogs and trying to get in your pants. Have fun with it and remember you are about to rock his world! Just try it and tell me t was not an incredble feeling to let go of those i securities for one night.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Most of those porno guys are ugly in the face tho. That's my opinion. C0ck sizes in porn are 7-9" or so, it's no 12" they use camera angles and illusions to fool people. It's some descent bods in porn, but any man who really cares about it can get to that level of physical body.

I'm really for an evolution of husband who is also a stud. That's my opinion.


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## jld

Jamestone said:


> Jld, your hubby is dead on. I dont know why women dont believe their closest friend and husbands on this one. My wife is the same way as you. But I can promise you that if i have a choice between a woman who owns her body and has he right mindset of not holding back because of her insecuritites, i will take that every time over the pefect model body who is insecure with whatever. Its such a turn off no sexy body can overcome. Just once I would like my wife to put all that nevative energy and thoughts into getting totally lost with me and she would never worry again.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


You are right on, Jamestone, about how women just have to be confident in their bodies, and really, themselves. 

I do feel good with dh, and my insecurities don't hold me back sexually. And really, I run around the house half-naked most of the time, so body image can't be that big of a problem for me. It is in my head, though.

And there have been threads here on TAM that have shown me that not all men find the same body types attractive. Just reading those threads can build a woman's self-confidence. Advertising makes us think there is only one acceptable body type.


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## jld

karma*girl said:


> Wow, jld, that totally speaks to me! I'm going to have get that book for sure. Okay, I just found the title: Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, & Lead, by Brene Brown. I think SA may have done a thread on this book. It really seems good.
> 
> For the guys that say it's how we feel in our bodies that is most important, I can understand that, but it's like a catch 22 for us.
> How can we feel confident & sure about ourselves when everything around us tells us there is something wrong with us. I regret that I understand this completely. Too well. I had an eating disorder when I was a teen because of this, and pressure from my mother. So sad, and so unnecessary.
> 
> I know we shouldn't let outside influences affect us but it's very, very difficult. Yep, it is. Years and years of conditioning, starting when we are young and so impressionable.
> My husband has never said anything in terms if comparing me, but I've seen the porn he's looked at & I'm opposite of the one girl he looked up more than once. Oh, I am so sorry. Have you shared this with him? It must hurt you terribly to know this.
> 
> The conditioning is hard core, I agree completely.
> Thank you again for the book suggestion..I'm going to look it up on my Nook( : I think you are very brave to speak up so honestly about this. It gives me the courage to talk about it, too. And I know there are women reading that have these feelings, too. Just seeing Holland's one sentence gave me the courage to post about it. I think many of us struggle with this.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


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## I Notice The Details

Mrs. John Adams said:


> I buy my own lingerie details...I would not want my beautiful hubby to buy it for me. I buy my own shoes...my own underwear, my own clothes....no no no...I don't want him to buy my stuff.


Mrs. JA, you are clearly comfortable and confident with dressing your body in a sexy way. I admire that. My wife was not when I married her. 

My Dad was not comfortable buying lingerie for my Mom either. I remember my older sister buying "bedroom clothes" because he was nervous or embarrassed. I certainly am not, and because my wife was raised by her step Mom who was almost a Nun, I had to step up and teach her what is sexy to her husband. If I hadn't purchased her lingerie and shoes over the years, she could possibly be wearing granny panties and birkenstocks at this very moment....Thank God that did not happen!!!!!!!


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## Tess112

I usually don't wear lingerie. I'm of the same opinion as Karma*girls husband - it would end up on the floor in a few seconds. 

I mentioned to my fiance that if he wanted me to wear some, I'd be willing to go out with him and pick some up. He seemed interested and we might go out next week and get some.


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## Anon Pink

Birkenstocks!!!! Granny Panties!!!!!


Oh the horror!


My husband recently learned to let go of his poker face. It has caused some fascinating consequences.


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## Marriedand40

I think it's fantastic that the barriers that women faced in the 70's, 80's and even the 90's are finally over. 

Alot of women on this forum will attest to that if you wore lingerie, you were a stripper, if you showed cleavage, you were a ****, etc.

It's about time that those boundaries are gone and women of all ages can wear sexy clothes and feel confident and good about themselves.

Even some sports bras are kind of sexy nowadays so it's good that women have a variety of colours and styles to pick from.

Breast sizes are alot larger nowadays and the quality of bras and underwear is better as well so that a lady doesn't have to cover up her curves anymore.

I think that any lady growing up should be learning about how to apply makeup properly from their mother or aunt or whoever and how to select the proper bras and underwear to suit their figure. It's a win-win really.

I do think that women should try to match their bras and underwear. I am a man and I hate seeing mis-matches.

Just my opinion anyway.


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## Rags

Don't know if anyone has mentioned this yet - haven't read every post - but, here's a tip:

It's worth spending money on decent lingerie.

The difference between a £20 item and an £80 item is huge - the cut, the feel, the material quality - you often can't tell in still shots, but you can tell when they move. And the difference is well worth it.

Real silk and satins are so much nicer (for the wearer) - they can boost confidence because it feels good.

I have this on good authority - not wearing it myself - but I do like to buy it and see it being worn - and help taking it off.

This is an area where it's best not to skimp.


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## NobodySpecial

karma*girl said:


> For the guys that say it's how we feel in our bodies that is most important, I can understand that, but it's like a catch 22 for us.
> How can we feel confident & sure about ourselves when everything around us tells us there is something wrong with us.


I think that people accept these images too easily. The "everything" we see is largely in the form of media. Don't watch it. We have not had network tv in twenty years. The commercials we see are at other people's super bowl parties. Period. Junk mail goes directly into the recycle bin, unopened. 

Just a thought. But it can go a long way.


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## jld

Machiavelli said:


> I'm old enough to remember The Time Before Pantyhose. All girls wore lingerie (garter and stockings) everyday. And Cokes were the old formula (not that phony "classic").


Just curious, Mach, if you don't mind my asking: How old are you?


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## Anon Pink

Pay attention gentlemen! The comments below should be memorized!



Rags said:


> Don't know if anyone has mentioned this yet - haven't read every post - but, here's a tip:
> 
> *It's worth spending money on decent lingerie.*
> 
> The difference between a £20 item and an £80 item is huge - the cut, the feel, the material quality - you often can't tell in still shots, but you can tell when they move. And the difference is well worth it.
> 
> *Real silk and satins are so much nicer (for the wearer) - they can boost confidence because it feels good.*
> 
> I have this on good authority - not wearing it myself - but I do like to buy it and see it being worn - and help taking it off.
> 
> This is an area where it's best not to skimp.


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## Tall Average Guy

karma*girl said:


> Wow, jld, that totally speaks to me! I'm going to have get that book for sure.
> 
> For the guys that say it's how we feel in our bodies that is most important, I can understand that, but it's like a catch 22 for us.
> How can we feel confident & sure about ourselves when everything around us tells us there is something wrong with us.
> 
> I know we shouldn't let outside influences affect us but it's very, very difficult.
> My husband has never said anything in terms if comparing me, but I've seen the porn he's looked at & I'm opposite of the one girl he looked up more than once.
> 
> The conditioning is hard core, I agree completely.
> Thank you again for the book suggestion..I'm going to look it up on my Nook( :
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


At some point, this is your problem. I understand the outside influences and your imperfections, but it is clear from your numerous posts on this issue that you don't believe you are worthy. You think that unless you are perfect (in a "the even have to airbrush the models" sort of perfect), no one could think you are attractive. Based on your posts, nothing we can say or do will change that. Your husband sounds like his attracted to you and you think he is just being polite.

My wife was a lot like you. A great looking girl who's body has changed a lot after three kids. I know she really does not like how she looks, with things have shifted and sagged to go along with stretch marks. But she believes me when I say and show her she is sexy. Those marks are her gift to me. Without them, we don't have our family. That is a big part of what makes her sexy. The more she believes me, the more confident she has become and the sexier she has gotten.

So go work on it with a therapist. We can't help you with this. You need to work on it before your self doubt actually hurts your marriage.


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## CharlieParker

Rags said:


> Don't know if anyone has mentioned this yet - haven't read every post - but, here's a tip:
> 
> It's worth spending money on decent lingerie.
> 
> The difference between a £20 item and an £80 item is huge - the cut, the feel, the material quality - you often can't tell in still shots, but you can tell when they move. And the difference is well worth it.
> 
> Real silk and satins are so much nicer (for the wearer) - they can boost confidence because it feels good.
> 
> I have this on good authority - not wearing it myself - but I do like to buy it and see it being worn - and help taking it off.
> 
> This is an area where it's best not to skimp.


Fleur of England brand comes to mind


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## karma*girl

TAG, You're right, I totally agree. I own it as my problem, not his or anyone else's. 

I have thought of going to therapy. It's just that I can't see how anyone else can help me see things any differently. I might try anyways. 

My husband is completely supportive & attracted to me, I have no doubt about that. He could not care less about my issues- they don't bother him one bit.

It's ALL me..and outside influences, unfortunately, will always be a part of our lives. 

I know I need to figure out a way to bypass my usual train of thought, so I don't drive myself crazy.

One thing I know-I would never let something that is my problem ruin a good thing, being my marriage. 

It has been a topic we have talked about on occasion, but I talk WAY more about it here, so I can figure things out without him having to hear it all the time.

We actually have a great sex life together..the bad stuff pretty much exists in my head..but it doesn't make it any less real to me.

Wearing lingerie has been something I personally have been interested in, but of course, my body is involved, soooo, it creates mental chatter..which I come here to get help with & figure out.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## karma*girl

As a side note- Although it does not appear this way, I honestly HAVE been tremendously affected, in a positive way, thanks to all those that have been kind enough to share their thoughts with me.
I take all the positive guidance & apply it in real life & it has made a difference to me. 
I learn & apply things incrementally, small changes, slowly have worked to influence my life for the better..
so thank you( :
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## jl2005

Love when my wife wears pantyhose, heels, short skirt. Something about being with her in public, wanting to feel her legs up, but not allowed to. playing footsie and feeling that silky nylon rubbing up my leg! Some will disagree, but pantyhose/stockings are lingerie meant for public viewing.


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## murphy5

soccermom2three said:


> Is it weird that my husband has never given me lingerie? In almost 32 years of dating and marriage?
> 
> Once in a while I wear one of his old t-shirts that he's given me but I usually wear a little nighty or a cami with shorts. I can't wear anything on my legs, it's too hot.


not really weird. Take him to a hot lingerie store, and let him pick out stuff....you are there to make sure it fits...then RUN home to model it for him. He might just be too embarrassed to be seen in a lingerie shop all by himself. Alternately, you can just do it online with him at the computer...but that is not as big a rush

As far as the posters who say they are embarrassed to wear it...some lingerie is VERY flattering! Corsets are basically designed to suck in your gut and make the boobs stick out. Mesh body suits make ANY woman look hot, and they are super stretchy to fit any figure.


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## jb02157

She did look good in it some 20 years ago but she let herself go and gained about 100 lbs. Never touches lingerie now only a really ugly set of sweats. I wish she would lose the weight and want to be sexy again but that day is never coming.


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## Zatol Ugot?

karma*girl said:


> I read often how many guys here say they love it when their wives wear lingerie & wish they'd do it more often, etc..
> Of course some don't care much about it at all- My husband has always fallen in the latter category.
> He says it always winds up on the floor in 5 seconds anyway, so it's not necessary...but I might want to try it anyway.
> 
> My question is- what is it about YOUR woman in lingerie that is so appealing? I always imagine you guys, who say how awesome it is, having women with amazing bodies. Long legs, large breasts, flat, perfect stomachs, no cellulite, perfect skin, etc..which would explain why you like it- they look amazing in it, of course!
> I think that's the only image I've ever seen of women in lingerie..always models, always pretty perfect looking.
> 
> I'm pretty sure that's why I've never ventured into that area.
> I've had the ..'I don't look like that so I'm not worthy of wearing that kind of thing' attitude.
> 
> But I can't believe that every guy who likes it on his wife has a picture perfect woman, right!?
> I'm trying to figure out how an average woman, like myself, can build the courage to pull of a corset & thigh highs with heels, etc..without thinking that HE'LL think WTH is she doing!?
> 
> I am curious to know what is it about YOUR woman in lingerie vs. every other woman you've seen in VS, or porn, or whatever, that makes you like it on (specifically) HER?
> 
> Thanks! ( :
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


KG,
This is something that has been an issue in my marriage for the longest time. I have struggled for the longest time trying to convince my wife to wear lingerie on a more frequent basis. We are both in our mid-forties and neither of us are supermodels. Regardless, I find her HOT when she gets all dressed up for me and I enjoy it immensely. 
She is a bit curvy (definitely not fat) and I find her very attractive. But she is always concerned about her "bulges" or jiggly bits. I try to do everything I can to comfort her and let her know that she looks amazing when she wears lingerie. You mentioned corset, thigh highs and heels. Oh my God that's my kryptonite. I LOVE that stuff. I would give almost anything if my wife dressed like that on some sort of regular basis. As it stands, I get some form of lingerie about once every couple of months.
What makes it different for my wife vs. the Victoria's Secret model? Victoria's Secret models are not real life. They are the "idealized" woman but they are not "my" woman. They are not the one that I love and married. Despite the stretch marks, small bulges and other imperfections, seeing my wife decked out in a sexy outfit is heaven to me. When she puts that stuff on, you can rest assured that my eyes are not fixated on the minor flaws of her body. I'm drinking in the entire scene and enjoying the overall visual.
What does my wife wearing lingerie do for me?

I am EXTREMELY visual and I do have a thing for lace, silk, satin, heels and stockings. 
I love for my wife to be as feminine as possible and what is more feminine that lingerie?
It is awesome when she puts the effort in and goes through the trouble to get all dolled up for me. It let me know that she has an interest in sparking my attention.
To me, it just makes sex hotter. I get turned on which, in turn, turns her on, big time. It's a win/win situation.


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## Zatol Ugot?

JCD said:


> A Case for Lingerie
> 
> ...just for me. *It's like a blow job for the eyes.* She gets nothing out of it, but is making a LARGE effort to please me.


I've never heard it phrased that way but it is so true. Great analogy.


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## mineforever

I got started wearing lingerie to build my self esteem. I had always been extremely thin and attractive. At around the age of 45 unbeknownst to me I developed a thyroid tumor and gained over 100 lbs in a very short period of time...on my 5'1" frame that was devastating. My self esteem plummeted. ..my hubby took to buying me the sexiest leather and lace lingerie he could find and lavishing it on me. He would show up at home constantly with something new....telling me how beautiful I was in it. I knew I was fat but he made me feel beautiful in his eyes. When the thyroid started making my waist length hair thin to half its thickness he took me to a professional stylist and paid $$$ to get it styled. A car accident and subsequent CT scan eventually identified the tumor and I dropped 85 lbs within the first year of havin the tumor removed. I tell you this to tell you lingerie can be a powerful boost to a women's self esteem fellas....not just something visual for you. Just a thought. I still wear lingerie but more for me than big guy...he prefers all natural. It makes me feel sexy and kinky all wrapped together. You don't have to be a model or a teenager to wear it.....I am on the other side of 50 don'tcha know...:-D....


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## Forest

This thread has made me think of the first time I saw wife (not yet wife then) when she was 19 and wearing a pair of boy's long-john underwear.

You had to be there. 19 year olds look good in everything.


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## rush

mineforever said:


> I got started wearing lingerie to build my self esteem. I had always been extremely thin and attractive. At around the age of 45 unbeknownst to me I developed a thyroid tumor and gained over 100 lbs in a very short period of time...on my 5'1" frame that was devastating. My self esteem plummeted. ..my hubby took to buying me the sexiest leather and lace lingerie he could find and lavishing it on me. He would show up at home constantly with something new....telling me how beautiful I was in it. I knew I was fat but he made me feel beautiful in his eyes. When the thyroid started making my waist length hair thin to half its thickness he took me to a professional stylist and paid $$$ to get it styled. A car accident and subsequent CT scan eventually identified the tumor and I dropped 85 lbs within the first year of havin the tumor removed. I tell you this to tell you lingerie can be a powerful boost to a women's self esteem fellas....not just something visual for you. Just a thought. I still wear lingerie but more for me than big guy...he prefers all natural. It makes me feel sexy and kinky all wrapped together. You don't have to be a model or a teenager to wear it.....I am on the other side of 50 don'tcha know...:-D....


hum.....my visionary imagination still works,,,,leather eh?


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## mineforever

Well ya know us country girls....:-D...
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## rush

yes I do, lol.............but still, wow


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## MarriedTex

soccermom2three said:


> Is it weird that my husband has never given me lingerie? In almost 32 years of dating and marriage?
> 
> Once in a while I wear one of his old t-shirts that he's given me but I usually wear a little nighty or a cami with shorts. I can't wear anything on my legs, it's too hot.



First five years of my 23-year marriage, I would regularly buy & give wife lingerie for gifts. Not every time, but enough to deliver the idea that I view her as sexy and that she deserved nice things. 

Same response every time. The lingerie would get worn once, then never to be seen again. After the first couple of times, I asked her to tell me what she liked/didn't like. Followed the guidance. Same result. I would joke to myself that I didn't know that this lingerie I was buying her was "disposable"- worn once and then seemingly tossed. But it sure seemed that way. 

I typically got pretty nice stuff ($50 pieces from the likes of Macy's/Dillard's) Not break the bank, but somewhat classy. Ultimately, though, her actions proved to me that she was not into it. Came to feel more like a gift for me than her. (Like a eight year old buying his Mom a catcher's mitt.)

Haven't bought her any lingerie in 15 years. & she hasn't bought any for herself either. Not a deal breaker but it is disappointing.


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## Zatol Ugot?

Okay, I had no intention of writing another post to this thread as I didn't really have anything new to add. But since this thread is about "*YOUR* woman in lingerie", I wanted to relay an experience about *MY* woman that I had last night. 
After getting off from work, I drove the 30 minute commute back to my home thinking about all of the "to-do's" that had to be accomplished, both at home and at work. As I came into the house, I noticed that my wife was nowhere to be seen as she normally beats me home from work as her job is closer to home. I generally find her in the kitchen preparing the night's dinner or taking a breather on the couch before we start the night's routine. I began to walk upstairs and turned the corner to go into my bedroom and was presented with a vision of beauty that I will have in my mind for a looooonngg time to come. My wife had beaten me home from work and taken the opportunity to by reclining on our bed, leaning on stacked pillows with nothing on other than a tiny, lacy red thong, thigh high stockings and five inch heels. I believe that I set a record for becoming undressed with shoes, pants and my tie flying everywhere. Let's just say that what happened next freakin' AWESOME! For both of us. Afterwards, my wife told me that the look on my face as I turned the corner and saw her splayed out in her sexy best was something like a young boy at Christmas getting the season's hottest toy. 
My point in relaying this story is to respond to the OP's original question by saying that it was *MY* woman that was laying there in lingerie for *ME*. It was not a Victoria's Secret super model or an anorexic 20 year old from a magazine laying on my bed. It was my wife. All 46 year old, stretch marked, slightly bulging bit of her. And she did this for ME. She put the effort in to give me something that she knows that I love. When I looked at her, there were no flaws. There was nothing to criticize. There was only a goddess in my bed and we were going to be having some serious fun. 
This whole thing surprised the crap out of me! My wife, like many/most women, has body image issues. I have struggled our entire marriage to convince her that I want to see her in the lacy and frilly items that we (mostly I) have bought over the years. Her self confidence just hasn't been there. I think that over the past year or so, that has begun to change a bit. And I like it! 
Moral of the story....you CAN'T let outside factors influence your self image. I know. I know. Easier said than done. But you have to take that leap of faith, especially with your spouse.


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## Zatol Ugot?

7 Ways to Make the Most of Your Lingerie | The Forgiven Wife

On target article.


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## SamuraiJack

Hmmmm...my woman in lingere means a lot of different things. Something I didnt see mentioned here was simple validation.
( I admit to skimming ...you may smack my wrists if need be)

When my GF puts on lingere or sexy clothes I know that she is tempting me and giving me the full go ahead. But its the validation of the lingere. The "Im putting this on to seduce you because I think you are worthy of seduction and I want you to know I feel this way ".
All other reasons are good too, but when my GF comes out in something fun...well I feel a little bit proud of the fact that I can instill this in a beautiful woman.
Something inside me goes "Hey Man...you still got it!"

The sex is fun too..


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## heartsbeating

SamuraiJack said:


> All other reasons are good too, but when my GF comes out in something fun...well I feel a little bit proud of the fact that I can instill this in a beautiful woman.
> Something inside me goes "Hey Man...you still got it!"


It was great to read this  ....and she's likely feeling she's still got it too.


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## heartsbeating

karma*girl said:


> I read often how many guys here say they love it when their wives wear lingerie & wish they'd do it more often, etc..
> Of course some don't care much about it at all- My husband has always fallen in the latter category.
> He says it always winds up on the floor in 5 seconds anyway, so it's not necessary...but I might want to try it anyway.


Have you ventured more into the world of lingerie for yourself since posting? 


I don't view lingerie as something that's just on for 5 seconds and then ends up on the floor. It can certainly serve that purpose, but for me, it's in part how I feel within myself as well as for the extended tease it can bring. 

Wearing thigh highs with a dress when heading to dinner with my husband, and subtly having him discover this when we're out... well, it's just good ole sexy fun.


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## rush

the last sexy lingerie I bought for my wife she would not wear as to the fact she said it was cheap....where is a good high end place I can order nice lingerie?


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## Fenix

heartsbeating said:


> Have you ventured more into the world of lingerie for yourself since posting?
> 
> 
> I don't view lingerie as something that's just on for 5 seconds and then ends up on the floor. It can certainly serve that purpose, but for me, it's in part how I feel within myself as well as for the extended tease it can bring.
> 
> Wearing thigh highs with a dress when heading to dinner with my husband, and subtly having him discover this when we're out... well, it's just good ole sexy fun.


Especially if it is only thigh highs.


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## ScarletBegonias

karma*girl said:


> I am curious to know what is it about YOUR woman in lingerie vs. every other woman you've seen in VS, or porn, or whatever, that makes you like it on (specifically) HER?
> 
> Thanks! ( :
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


DH was keen on lingerie for a while then he got tired of it. "Why aren't you naked?? I can't see your body I can't feel your skin!!"

lol

I have no idea why he liked lingerie on me. Probably the mystery of it. One piece he loved in particular was gorgeous bright pink silk w/spaghetti straps. I think he really enjoyed the bright color and the feel of the silk.


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## Zatol Ugot?

rush said:


> the last sexy lingerie I bought for my wife she would not wear as to the fact she said it was cheap....where is a good high end place I can order nice lingerie?


Stockings by Secrets in Lace - Lingerie, Nylon Stockings, Bras, Girdles, Garter Belts, Seamed Stockings, Retro Lingerie, Vintage Lingerie
Stockings & Thigh Highs by Stockingirl


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## murphy5

MarriedTex said:


> First five years of my 23-year marriage, I would regularly buy & give wife lingerie for gifts. Not every time, but enough to deliver the idea that I view her as sexy and that she deserved nice things.
> 
> Same response every time. The lingerie would get worn once, then never to be seen again. After the first couple of times, I asked her to tell me what she liked/didn't like. Followed the guidance. Same result. I would joke to myself that I didn't know that this lingerie I was buying her was "disposable"- worn once and then seemingly tossed. But it sure seemed that way.
> .


nowadays, with sexy lingerie shops in the malls, it is easy to go shopping at the mall, stroll by a Fredricks of Hollywood, stop and look thru the window, and say to her "hey lets go in", and not move until she joins you inside. Then have HER try out stuff, but make sure it is something you would find sexy too before she buys it!

If that fails, you could just throw out all her granny panties one day. Then she might get the message.:smthumbup:

My wife does the same "I don't like it if its not high quality" thing, but if she goes into the high-quality shop, it ends up being granny panties again. I have to go in there with her and say.."uh...not that one, how about these instead....."

Why do women make is so hard for us guys? We don't like hanging around in victorias secret as you try on stuff, but we cant leave--lest the granny panties and white padded bras show up in the bedroom again


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## sinnister

> My question is- what is it about YOUR woman in lingerie that is so appealing?


Nothing.


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## mineforever

sinnister said:


> Nothing.


 well thats not good....


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## over20

ocotillo said:


> I get loopy when she's in an ultra-short kimono style robe. --Can't even begin to explain why.


That's hot, prob because you can see where her legs meet her rear....that's what my hubs loves to touch....that crease...


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## I Notice The Details

sinnister said:


> Nothing.


That cannot be your real answer....is it?????


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## WorkingOnMe

I Notice The Details said:


> That cannot be your real answer....is it?????



Read his situation. Ya, that's his real answer.


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## WorkingOnMe

That's not what he means. He means there's nothing appealing


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## sinnister

I Notice The Details said:


> That cannot be your real answer....is it?????


It is. I can't stand lingerie.

Also I'm foot guy so pantyhose annoys the ever living crap out of me.


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## over20

sinnister said:


> It is. I can't stand lingerie.
> 
> Also I'm foot guy so pantyhose annoys the ever living crap out of me.


Your like my hubs....


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## I Notice The Details

I see....I like legs, but I enjoy when my wife wears thigh highs....and high heel shoes. I also love when women take care of their feet. My wife does this too. Very sexy!


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## DanaS

I have greatly enjoyed reading this thread, and can most DEFINITELY emphasize about what all the ladies are saying about feeling bad about our bodies. 

My ex was never supportive or loving when it came to my body issues. He always made me feel as if I were ugly and worthless, when we'd watch TV/Movies when an attractive woman would come on he'd say "Why can't you look like her?"; among other mean and nasty comments. Even though I have always exercised and ate right (for the most part).

Getting older certainly didn't help, and when I hit 40 I pretty much started dressing like a nun. I felt so horrible. Then I met my now husband and everything changed. He said I was beautiful and loved the way I look and did/does always compliment me. At first I didn't believe it, especially coming from a man 15 years younger! I thought this guy was crazy and surely the younger girls are far more attractive than me.

But he persisted. I remember the first date we went on I wore a red dress I bought and hadn't even worn before, as soon as he saw it he remarked how lovely it looked and said I looked great wearing it. I remember when he did I actually laughed at him thinking he was just joking. I feel bad about it now because I know he was telling the truth. 

Slowly but surely when I noticed his comments were genuine I felt more confident and shopped more and bought much nicer blouses/dresses/skirts etc. and to this day he still tells me I look nice  

Funny thing, when I hit 40 I started wearing one piece bathing suits (we go swimming fairly often) and when I started dating him we went shopping and I looked for a new bathing suit, while I was looking at the one piece ones he asked "Why not get a bikini?" I told him I am to old for that and don't have the body, but he said I was being crazy and I would look great in one but it was up to me what I got. I finally gave in, got a bikini and have been wearing them exclusively now. 

Who would have thought a man 15 years younger could improve an older woman's confidence in her looks and body? I certainly wouldn't have ever thought so! It may seem silly now but at the time it was a huge issue for me. Granted, I still have some hang ups, but I would still have them even if I weren't with him. 

As hard as it is, we do need to do our best to have confidence in ourselves and our bodies no matter what the media or anyone else says. Now that I am with my husband I am always happy to spend money on "sexy" and "nice" clothes! 

Oh, and for the record, my husband LOVES lingerie! While some men may be all for taking it off immediately, he actually asks for me to keep it on for awhile before we do the deed. I also have bought some nice night gowns and other things to wear to bed. 

You know, one thing my husband said to me, really got me to think. I was bemoaning to him how I am getting older and that it can be difficult, to which my husband replied "Well, isn't that all the more reason to put effort into looking nice now?". He was so right. Truth is every man and woman will one day get old, get grey hairs and not look that great, so either we can maximize and have fun with what we have now or waste it by worrying. I love my husband!!

Oh, and because my guy is a legs man (which he says are my best physical assets) I especially try to accentuate my legs with skirts and such. In particular he loves pencil skirts so I have plenty of those. I am actually the first woman he's been with that has worn them, something he has brought up many times heh.


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## I Notice The Details

Excellent post DanaS! :smthumbup:


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## FizzBomb

I am 100% for lingerie and think that every woman should own at least 1 or 2 complete outfits that make her feel aroused and sexy when she dons them.

My favourite pieces are:

thigh highs (regular, fishnets, line down the back)
high heels (I order stripper type heels from ebay)
open cup lace bra (does awesome things to a pair of t!ts)

I am the buyer of lingerie in our house. My husband has never bought me any pieces at all - doesn't bother me. It is interesting to hear from other men about how they shop for lingerie for their wives online or how they try and get their wives to go into a lingerie store with them.


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## naiveonedave

I too love lingerie, it shows how much she cares to 'doll up' for me. To me that is priceless. Even though she has personal issues with her body, I love every square inch! The wrapping just gives me more time to enjoy it all.


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## options20

karma*girl said:


> I read often how many guys here say they love it when their wives wear lingerie & wish they'd do it more often, etc..
> Of course some don't care much about it at all- My husband has always fallen in the latter category.
> He says it always winds up on the floor in 5 seconds anyway, so it's not necessary...but I might want to try it anyway.
> 
> My question is- what is it about YOUR woman in lingerie that is so appealing? I always imagine you guys, who say how awesome it is, having women with amazing bodies. Long legs, large breasts, flat, perfect stomachs, no cellulite, perfect skin, etc..which would explain why you like it- they look amazing in it, of course!
> I think that's the only image I've ever seen of women in lingerie..always models, always pretty perfect looking.
> 
> I'm pretty sure that's why I've never ventured into that area.
> I've had the ..'I don't look like that so I'm not worthy of wearing that kind of thing' attitude.
> 
> But I can't believe that every guy who likes it on his wife has a picture perfect woman, right!?
> I'm trying to figure out how an average woman, like myself, can build the courage to pull of a corset & thigh highs with heels, etc..without thinking that HE'LL think WTH is she doing!?
> 
> I am curious to know what is it about YOUR woman in lingerie vs. every other woman you've seen in VS, or porn, or whatever, that makes you like it on (specifically) HER?
> 
> Thanks! ( :
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


All the girls I've been with have been perfect in the physical sense besides the first girl I was with. I've dated models one cheerleader and my best friend who is amazingly gorgeous. She was almost my height and heavier than my preference but she was curvy still and I really liked her in push up bras she had like the perfect A cups for being a bigger girl. But all the girls I've been with had been 20 or younger so I never had to deal with other issues one might face. I like small breasts though. Usually the vs models are little too big chested also a little too tall.

On my current girl though I really don't like bras on her. Because her breasts are really small it's a better view without cloth in the way. I like her in corsets though with ruffled panties it really emphasizes her pear shape dynamic for me. Otherwise I find her eually as sexy in her birthday suit.


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