# I want to employ wifey!



## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

The missus has been keeping herself occupied but is still yet to find herself a job. I've been a sole provider with my little restaurant and has supported us thus far, but since sobering up I've been looking at expansion. For that, I need someone to help out with marketing, especially since I just established a bar but it's relatively new.

Judging by what I've seen of her over the years, she would be perfect for a marketing position and/or sales. I'm confident in her ability to sell ice to eskimos, and I always get her to tag along whenever I go shopping as she always gets me good prices and prevents me getting ripped off lol
(And seeing her arguing with folks turns me on hehe)
She's not qualified but she's sharp and I'm sure she can pick things up rather quick.

My "office" at the back used to house me, my wife and daughter years ago when she came in to help out with the dishes/cleaning/etc so it's not like her starting work will rob her of her SAHM time and if she needs to go on the field I can take care of our daughter. The question is however...

How to get her to do it? 
I'd rather her then someone else, saves money and I know her ability... her lack of training worries me but shouldn't be a problem in a month or so, what you guys think?


----------



## Hopefull363 (Feb 13, 2012)

Tread carefully, very carefully. I can't speak for everyone but my husband and I had our own business for 13 years. We've been married for 14 years. Our relationship is much better now that we are not working together.


----------



## Posse (Jan 30, 2012)

Bad idea.


----------



## occasionallybaffled (Apr 12, 2012)

I won't say it's a bad idea... but be cautious. Can easily/unexpectedly change the dynamic of your relationship.


----------



## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Well, she did come in to help out every once in a while in the past. No issues at that time, either than having her around 24/7 in my life which caused a bit of distress, and workplace gossip due to her unable to keep silent during office quickies.

But that was then, and a role in marketing won't require her to be at the restaurant all the time. However, please share your experiences, what kind of things may happen in the long run?


----------



## occasionallybaffled (Apr 12, 2012)

I don't have personal experiences but I've seen friends/relatives attempt it, and it usually doesn't work out/end well.

It may not *take away* from her duties as a SAHM, but it will *add* to them. She will be much more busier than she currently is, so your quality time with her will most likely decrease.

She may not finish projects as quickly as you like or you may not like the quality of her work (which will be under scrutiny because you still need the job performed effectively/efficiently.

It reminds me of sharing an apartment with really good friends. You get along well and engage in social activities, but you later find out that they aren't the best roommate. Dishes left in the sink "for later", lights left on when no one is home, etc. Some relationships only work on one plane. If you combine those planes, there is nowhere left to retreat. Maintaining a healthy marriage is no easy task. I would be weary of coupling that with my spouse as my business partner/associate. Either of you could take professional criticisms as a personal attack. Are you prepared to risk that?


----------



## YellowRoses (Jun 2, 2012)

This may be a British or a purely personal niggle

But you calling her 'wifey' and 'the missus' irritates me to the point of wondering whether you just want some more cheap labour from her and what the dynamic in your relationship is

Like others have said its tough to work together as well as live together.

Was there any need to mention your office quickies ?


----------



## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

For us Aussies we use "the missus" all the time. 
And the office quickies? We tried our hardest to be discreet about it of course, but rumors spread fast in regards to the missus' 'visits' and there was simply no saying no to her at that time in the past, her sex drive was uncontrollable.

Anyways yeah I see what you guys mean, it'll add in more issues/problems... and it's risky to try. I'm just sick of feeling that sometimes she's just not making full use of her time that's all, especially when I know what she's capable of.

EDIT: Hell, I thought of this before, I even forgot I wrote an old thread about this very same thing... ARGH!


----------



## rj700 (Jun 22, 2012)

You know the dynamics or your relationship better than anyone else, so you should be able to envision the possible pros & cons. One pro to add is that you will be adding to her skill set, making her more marketable/employable elsewhere in the long run.


----------



## TiggyBlue (Jul 29, 2012)

YellowRoses said:


> This may be a British or a purely personal niggle
> 
> But you calling her 'wifey' and 'the missus' irritates me to the point of wondering whether you just want some more cheap labour from her and what the dynamic in your relationship is
> 
> ...


 LMFAO im british and that really irritates me too :smthumbup:

kinda confused how it would save money though


----------



## Starstarfish (Apr 19, 2012)

Is this related to the other thread?

Are you looking to honestly hire her because you think she's be a good employee, or because she's "enjoying life too much" as a SAHM, and needs to go back to work because your friends say so?

It would save money because he wouldn't be giving her a salary, likely. Which - I think would just increase the problems here, as in your mind you'd still consider her -just- a SAHM.


----------



## Lyris (Mar 29, 2012)

I'm an Aussie too, as is my husband, and I'd be pretty unimpressed with being referred to as 'the missus'. Or 'her indoors'. Or 'the old ball and chain'.

And wifey? Nothing Australian about that. It's weird. 

How are strangers on a forum going to tell you how to convince your wife of anything? You're the one who knows her.


----------



## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Starstarfish said:


> Is this related to the other thread?


Yes



> Are you looking to honestly hire her because you think she's be a good employee, or because she's "enjoying life too much" as a SAHM, and needs to go back to work because your friends say so?


All of the above



> It would save money because he wouldn't be giving her a salary, likely. Which - I think would just increase the problems here, as in your mind you'd still consider her -just- a SAHM.


She'll be reaping the profits in which she is already spending.
And in my mind I see an intelligent and very capable lady whose talents are not being used to their full potential.


----------



## Leahdorus (Jul 28, 2008)

My husband has his own software consulting business and a number of years ago I worked for him, when I was between contracts. He needed my skills as a project manager, I was highly qualified, and he wanted me to help him stay on schedule. Well, I tried to do my job, but he made it next to impossible. He would not respond to my requests for status updates, etc. I was able to see how he managed his business and it was not the way I would do it, so it was frustrating for both of us. It just wasn't working out. In the end, he hired a project manager (a colleague of mine), and he responded to her requests...not sure what the deal was there.

Anyway, what I'm getting at is that mixing business with a marriage is not always a great idea. Are you her boss or her husband? The lines get blurred and it can put both relationships at risk. I valued the marriage more than being able to help him out and now I don't get involved in his biz.


----------



## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Hmmm... now that you mention it, yeah maybe this wasn't such a good idea. Back then she was just helping out casually, but if given her more responsibility, she would most definitely snap back.

*sigh*


----------

