# Confused



## Smiling2

This is my first time on here. My husband and I of 18 years together separated it’s been a year and 3 months. I tried to go to marriage counseling with him but he hated it and so t go back (. He didn’t like being told what he did wrong ). I tried going to dinner with him and our daughter but he never talks to me just her. When I ask him about divorce he doesn’t answer me but will text our daughter about it. Not sure what to do. Feeling very confused


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## examp

You seem to be smiling and confused! You dont tell us if you want divorce or not. You really will have to get someone else in the picture to talk between you. No one likes being told what they do wrong so your counsellor wasnt very good. If he went that usually shows he wanted the marriage but I suppose on his terms. Maybe he still wants it. If you post in general relationships you will get more views and replies.


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## MattMatt

What does he do that is wrong?


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## Smiling2

He talked to our daughter about adult stuff she was in 5th grade when this happened. He is still doing it now. She is a senior in high school. He mentally abused her. He has done so much damage to our relationship. I’ve tried to talk to him about this stuff and he won’t talk about it.


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## Diana7

Smiling2 said:


> He talked to our daughter about adult stuff she was in 5th grade when this happened. He is still doing it now. She is a senior in high school. He mentally abused her. He has done so much damage to our relationship. I’ve tried to talk to him about this stuff and he won’t talk about it.


In that case why dont you end the marriage? What do you mean by 'adult stuff'?. Why do you both still see him if he mentally abused her.?


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## Smiling2

We have been separated for two years. We hardly see him any more. I’ve been trying to talk to him about it but he won’t talk about it.


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## examp

Does your daughter also think he 'mentally' abused her or only you. You do say he still talks to her and I suppose that usually means she also replies.


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## MattMatt

Does your daughter see him?


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## EleGirl

Smiling2 said:


> We have been separated for two years. We hardly see him any more. I’ve been trying to talk to him about it but he won’t talk about it.


It sounds like he has no interesting in getting back with you. That's probably why he's not talking to you. 

Do you know why he has not filed for divorce if he does not want to be with you?

Have you considered filing for divorce?


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## Ragnar Ragnasson

OP, there are too many directions going on here, can you provide additional real details in regards to varying topics?

Forgive me, there are only topics named,glossed on then moving on.

Hang in there. Make sure you have plans to care for you and to co-parent, in the worst case scenario.

Btw the mental abuse you mentioned re daughter is either your perception or it's a true item needing attention. 

Kindly, two very different approaches are called for in that one circumstance.


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