# Help with getting proof



## Kreissage (Apr 15, 2012)

So glad I found this site. Hoping to get some help getting proof that wife, who moved out today, is cheating. 

I guess I've known in my gut for a while that she was having at least an emotional affair, but I was in denial and was satisfied with my situation. Also some complications such as a co-owned business, house under water, very close to each other's families (and the list goes on), I just wanted to stick my head in the sand.

I don't want to make an decision on trying to reconcile or divorce until I have proof that she is cheating. You guys will think I'm a fool when you read the signs below:

1. Stopped having her cell phone carrier send a paper bill. Online only (I don't have the password, never asked). When I do the taxes she'll just put the yearly total on spreadsheet.

2. Changed browser settings to not save history and to delete cookies upon closing program.

3. Super secretive with Facebook (and poker). She won't get up from the computer without making sure she is logged out. 

4. We both bought new smart phones, every text I've ever sent is still in my phone, along with call history. One day I checked and she had deleted all texts and call history. 

5. I had a free trial for Refog (key logger) and saw a screenshot where she was putting in privacy settings that said all her friends could read her wall and her friend list except for my brother. I don't have a FB page.


There's more but those are obviously more than ominous signs.

I read on another thread that I could retrieve her texts if she syncs her phone with itunes. Can someone provide steps on how to do this? (PC, Vista).

Also, I want to install a good keylogger but I can't purchase one without her seeing a purchase on the bank or credit card statement so it needs to be free. Any recommendations from people that have actually used a good free keylogging program? I primarily want the password to her FB, but if it can create screenshots, all the better.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

VAR (voice activated recorders) are the most effective weapon with the cheater police.

Plant the VAR in her car, use velcrow to tape it up under the seat or under the dash.

Buy a couple of them and once you get into her place you can plant one there.

Hire a PI, costly but very effective, especially if they have her schedule and routine


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## Kreissage (Apr 15, 2012)

the guy said:


> VAR (voice activated recorders) are the most effective weapon with the cheater police.
> 
> Plant the VAR in her car, use velcrow to tape it up under the seat or under the dash.
> 
> ...


Thanks for the reply. I'll start looking for one, maybe in the office as that would her best opportunity.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

The car is a most!

The office would be a good place for the 2nd one. There cheap

Its a proven fact that cheaters are most comfortable in there car when it comes to taking out loud to the AP.


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

What would be the purpose of this sleuthing? Has she given you some indication that she wants to be married to you? If you record her chatting with someone inappropriately, are you going to make her move farther away? She already moved out. Before you break into her car to plant a recorder, check the laws of your state. Pay special attention to Stalking, Vehicle Burglary, and Eavesdropping. In my state, that looks like two felonies and a misdemeanor. Of course, you'd have to break back into the car to retrieve the recorder. She's not sneaking around to play Farmville.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

As mentioned above you will need to keep this on the down low, but at least you'll get some answers.

With all of this said, a PI may be your best and safest bet in getting the info that will help you move on.


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## AngryandUsed (Jun 23, 2011)

Kreissage said:


> So glad I found this site. Hoping to get some help getting proof that wife, *who moved out today*, is cheating.
> 
> I guess I've known in my gut for a while that she was having at least an emotional affair, but I was in denial and was satisfied with my situation. Also some complications such as a co-owned business, house under water, very close to each other's families (and the list goes on), I just wanted to stick my head in the sand.
> 
> ...


Why did she move out?

From the signs you are seeing, they are red flags. You need to atleast get to know what is going on.

There are some posters who are familiar with smartphone syncing with PCs. I hope they will give you ideas.

You have narrated the signs you have observed. Can you tell us about her behaviour in the past and recently?

How is your sex life?

You get the signals only after the A is already in.

As someone earlier said, PI should be your route....


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## OldWolf57 (Mar 20, 2012)

and man just go to the D##M bank and take some money out, if she ask, just say you wanted it. so what if she pissed. you being cucked. or just tell her you doing like Dave Ramsey say, pay with cash.


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## Will_Kane (Feb 26, 2012)

What was the stated reason for moving out?

Do you have kids?


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

You can buy a visa prepaid card with cash and use it to buy keyloogers online do she won't see the purchase
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## warlock07 (Oct 28, 2011)

Get more eveidence. I don't think there is enough to suggest an affair.


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## CandieGirl (Apr 27, 2011)

Will_Kane said:


> What was the stated reason for moving out?
> 
> Do you have kids?


She moved out to test run her new life, whatever it entails. If it is a success, she'll file for divorce. If it is a failure, she'll be running back telling the OP that she made a HUGE mistake.

My husband's ex pulled a similar stunt. Happily, when she begged him back after a few months, he told her to go phuck herself. The end.


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## anonymous1978 (Dec 27, 2010)

If you haven't figured out how to see deleted texts on an iPhone...
First, the phone must be backed-up, not just synced...in iTunes, right-click on the phone and select "back-up".

On a PC, Navigate to the folde: ~/Library/Application Support/MobileSync/Backup/. 
Open that directory and look for the following filename: 3d0d7e5fb2ce288813306e4d4636395e047a3d28

(do not "search" the folder or file name, it will not show in your search results.)

Vists the site iPhone SMS backup export - Convert your iPhone's iMessages, text messages and contacts to PDF, CSV, XML and Android

Upload the file...

Here is a helpful website How to Access and Read the iPhone SMS Text Message Backup Files
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Chaparral (Jul 17, 2011)

Since she moved out, you should:

Talk to a lawyer

Separate finances, take half the money in your joint accts and get a debit card, cancel joint accts..........You are helping pay for an affair

Kids?

Who do you suspect the OM is? Moving out means she is separating so she can take the affair physical with out guilt. If thats a deal breaker let her know you will file for divorce. You don't have to know she is having an affair, just general ground rules.

You may want to put a hidden camera in your office

If your name is on the car title I don't believe you have to worry about the law

Have you tried to guess her password? Does facebook report to her email when she logs on?

You can get deleted texts from the computer and Iphone is synched with

iPhone Backup Extractor for Windows and Mac

Since its a co owned business, go over the books

If shes cheating she's lying, don't believe anything she says wihtout confirmation


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## Almostrecovered (Jul 14, 2011)

shame you didnt act when you got suspicious before she moved out- a keylogger would have yielded all of the answers

you may want to try Fchat- it's a program that retrieves some of the deleted facebook chats, so if you still have the computer at your house you can check


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

Almostrecovered said:


> shame you didnt act when you got suspicious before she moved out- a keylogger would have yielded all of the answers
> 
> you may want to try Fchat- it's a program that retrieves some of the deleted facebook chats, so if you still have the computer at your house you can check


:iagree:

If she used Skype, you can use Skype Log Viewer from Nirsoft, it's free. You should be able to retrieve all chats she's ever made using Skype.

There's also a chance that a web browser has saved any passwords, but you have to do this under her profile. Using WebBrowserPassView is a good utility to retrieve usernames and passwords IF its still stored in the browser. It's free from nirsoft, so you don't lose anything if it doesn't work.


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## OldWolf57 (Mar 20, 2012)

dude, just do like Chap said, separate everything now. if she ask why, just say for your own protection because you don't trust her any more. I'm a in your face type guy when crossed, and I listen to my guts, I don't need anything else. if my gut say she cheating, then I see a lawyer. I mean what is some judge going to do, force me to live with her.


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