# Long laundry list of hate towards me



## brokenbythis (Aug 21, 2011)

ok well I guess it's time to hire a lawyer and get myself protected. Today we had our FINAL discussion.

He vented a very long, angry, bitter list of terrible things I have done to him, the "you made me dump my friends" came up a lot. He dumped his friends not me, if he did, I had told him my concerns of their unfair treatment of me and I also told him I expected my husband to come to my defence.

He sees the other EA's as totally fine, and I don't. He said we have a different perspective. Yes well I think that is accurate. I asked him if he would ever consider a comprimise on these matters and he said no he is definitely done and wants out for good.

I am tired of this emotional rollercoater. If he really is done we should not prolong the process. So I told him we should go ahead and make it official. I will hire an attorney this week. I had been relucatant to do so in the past since we have been going to MC and having talks, and I was getting the vibe he may stick in there and try to finally work things out. He is full of hate and refuses to look at any of his own issues. He has pushed me away for many years and seems frightened of any real intimacy with his wife. In turn I have been angry and hurt for a very long time.

How sad I am. How disappointed I am. I am fearful for my child's emotional wellbeing. This is not my choice by any means but we all know here we have no control over the OP's actions. They make their own choices.

Now that I have no doubts about his intentions, as far as I'm concerned he can communicate any concerns about our child via short email and I don't want to see him in any manner, shape or form. He can pick his visitation days and pick up our 8yo from the front. I don't have to see him.


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## Lostouthere (Aug 24, 2011)

Sorry to hear it has came to this. Now comes the big thing is stick to your guns about not seeing him or talking with him. 

Sounds like hes trying to stay angry with you to justify in his head his own actions. It will still be a rough ride for a little while but you will get through along with the rest of us here. As you said we cannot control the other persons actions but you can bet one day they will regret the decision.


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## brokenbythis (Aug 21, 2011)

Yes I told him I'm sure he is feeling fine right now, he has his freedom, his peace, his partying and his friends he so much wants. I reminded him however "free" he may feel now we are ALL going to suffer from his decision for the rest of our lives. Especially our child. That's the really saddest part of this. Our poor little boy. Our son told me he would rather have daddy here every night and listen to arguments than to not have daddy here and have to go visit him. My husband disagrees. You probably know the drill "the kids are better off us divorced" line.

I listened to his justifications and I do validate his feelings I just thought he had it in him to try a little longer, especially since our MC's have been going well, we have been communicating so much better, etc.. We've been learning about setting boundaries and I had hoped we could put some in place to make us both happy. I thought we were on the right road to working out our differences. He has told me in the past few weeks, he still loves me, he likes me as a person a lot, and respects me.

Instead he has thrown in the towel for good.

He is so full of hate and anger it worries me..


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