# Gender Specific Bennies



## JCD (Sep 2, 2012)

In the 'Sexual Objectification' thread, there was a lot of talk about the trials and travails put upon women because of their gender. Leers, gropes, sexual assaults etc.

But this is only, IMO, half the story. Currently, I commute a lot to a Third World Country. In some ways, much more is expected of me because I am a WASP male.

But in other ways, I am also cut much more slack because I am a WASP male. 

So, ladies, I would ask what gender specific benefits do you think you garner to offset the negatives.

It can be anything from 'nicer clothes' to 'getting out of trouble easier' to 'childbirth'. What benefits in society do you see yourself accrue which your Y chromosome counterparts lack?

I'll start this off (and I hope not on a negative note) in that women always have a career track: mommy/child caregiver. I had a conversation with a female co-worker. Her plan B if her career didn't jump start was 'getting married'.

This is an option I lack unless I want to be a cabana boy for a wealthy heiress...and frankly, I don't have the abs for that.


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## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

I consider having boobs a benefit.


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## Fozzy (Jul 20, 2013)

Faithful Wife said:


> I consider having boobs a benefit.


Me too.


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## lisad45 (Feb 21, 2014)

Boobs, legs, and ass. Definitely a benefit lol


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

JCD said:


> I'll start this off (and I hope not on a negative note) in that women always have a career track: mommy/child caregiver. I had a conversation with a female co-worker. Her plan B if her career didn't jump start was 'getting married'.


There is no guarantee that she will get married, though. A lot of people don't get married. And that is sad that she sees that as her only "fallback" option.

Hmm let's see... for me... I do like if I am out, and a man holds the door open for me,, where he may not do that for another man... there is almost a tenderness when it happens. Or if you ask a guy to help lift something heavy, ti's done with a little bit of chest-puffing like, "Oh I got this." I like that. 

Also, I love the nurturing friendships women have together. There is something I get from female friends and can share with their in conversation that I cannot with male friends. Those sharing my female experience (other women) can relate to it. If we get excited to see eachother and are all "Ohh how are you doing" and sort of hug and get excited, ti's more acceptable than if men do it.


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

You should try being an American female in the developing world. Talk about expectations. All woman want you to be their savior, their mentor and their heroine. As an American woman, everyone is watching you, they want to believe in what they have heard about your life and your freedoms. Meanwhile, the men overseas in those countries just want to test their own assumptions about American women...

So, I'm not polite about it. In one country, I received an invite to a networking function that featured beautiful (sexy) waitresses in a halter bra top (sequined.) I replied asking if that was the dress code or if pasties were okay? Half a mind to show up in a halter top, jeggings and stacked heels and conduct business as usual with male counterparts from US, NZ and Oz acting like it is normal!

Benefits, well, being able to do things like that and have people not know if it's normal or not for American woman. THANK YOU HOLLYWOOD!!!!!!

A girl has to have her fun.

Don't kid yourself about expectations of yourself overseas. Just drop some money here and there and everyone will be more than happy having their expectations met. ;-) Aside from the true humanitarian work, other organizations for development in those countries are lining pockets, and you might be surprised whose pockets they are, if you dug a little deeper.

Oh, another benefit of being a woman, especially an American woman? People think you're a dizt, and harmless. So they tend not to censor. It's a real asset when gathering information, here, there, everywhere. If a guy thinks he can score, he will keep talking and talking and talking, as you lean closer and closer and closer. Too funny!


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## ScarletBegonias (Jun 26, 2012)

The courtesy you get from most men is really a huge benefit,like JB was saying. 

Also,as a woman if you go to a restaurant alone or to a movie alone you're not regarded as creepy or a lurker whereas men might be viewed as a little off if they go to see the latest pixar film by themselves.

we get to wear makeup when we're looking tired too.Men for the most part just have to hang it all out there...dark circles,pimples and all. 

Multiple orgasms.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

ScarletBegonias said:


> Multiple orgasms.


:rofl:

HOW ON EARTH could I forget this one???


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

Career track statement is funny. 
Never crossed my mind to have that as a priority, in fact, I fielded off two very decent proposals to leave home and pursue my thing. Marriage is a detriment to what I do. And kids have put me on hold for the next decade, more or less...but when they're grown, they understand mommy is out and about again. (They let me loose last summer, otherwise I would have gone nuts.) I can only take so much housekeeping and homemaking (despite user name) before I have to go out into the world. 

I see marriage as something I will MAYBE do when I am old and definitely retired, and have time for that sort of thing (maybe 80, maybe not.)

I've spent all of two years of my entire life being married. Not for me. I am still reading this web site trying to figure our why it should be...so many people seem to see it as a goal.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Homemaker_Numero_Uno said:


> Career track statement is funny.
> Never crossed my mind to have that as a priority, in fact,


Me, too, Homemaker.

I had a friend in college who's parents had a wedding fund for her, which I thought she was joking about, but she wasn't. At that point, she'd never even had a boyfriend. She made it pretty clear that her life's goal was to get married and essentially never work or have dreams about anything other than that. I found it endlessly fascinating. She was the the antithesis to, well, me.


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## ScarletBegonias (Jun 26, 2012)

Jellybeans said:


> Me, too, Homemaker.
> 
> I had a friend in college who's parents had a wedding fund for her, which I thought she was joking about, but she wasn't. At that point, she'd never even had a boyfriend. She made it pretty clear that her life's goal was to get married and essentially never work or have dreams about anything other than that. I found it endlessly fascinating. She was the the antithesis to, well, me.


I wonder what that's like. How it feels to have no other urges. I can't imagine.


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## JCD (Sep 2, 2012)

Trust me, she tried very hard to work in her field. However, she felt she had a 'safety net'.

Men tend to not have safety nets. It makes us a little crazy and driven.


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

Jellybeans said:


> Me, too, Homemaker.
> 
> I had a friend in college who's parents had a wedding fund for her, which I thought she was joking about, but she wasn't. At that point, she'd never even had a boyfriend. She made it pretty clear that her life's goal was to get married and essentially never work or have dreams about anything other than that. I found it endlessly fascinating. She was the the antithesis to, well, me.


My best friend full blooded NA (I'm just part) was going to get married off to her friend's dad in a horse and land swap (I kid you not, and this wasn't two bit trading, it was big time ranching kind of deal.) She begged off if she could go to college and her dad agreed, even gave her a new sportscar for not marrying her boyfriend. Well, she took the car and drove off, and enlisted in the Air Force (where I met her) and her boyfriend joined the Army and last I saw her she was married to him, he got stationed at a base near hers in CA and she was expecting. Her dad forgave her as she was the youngest of 12 girls. Her brother died and so her joining the military and acting like boy kind of filled a gap. Thing about NA culture, cunning like that and giving someone the slip is admired, more so in a woman! Life is tougher for us.

In Mongolia, I found the same thing. Nobody looks down on a woman there for being capable, not just in money, but in all ways. Women have to be tougher than men. I think it's just in America that women have some kind of delusion they're attached to that they can be lightweights and submissive when it comes to life, and men. In other countries, and in cultures within our own country, it's not the same, at all.

These beliefs people are talking about here are a bubble - a delusional one. The only reason we want our men to be dominant is so that we can keep sending them off to war to do our dirty work for us, even though it's clear that everyone reaps the benefits. It's wrong, but we don't want to admit it. So most people cling very tightly to our beliefs.


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## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

There is definitely a level of courtesy and respect given to women by men (at least in the USA). This is more obvious in older men than younger ones. But this courtesy can be used against you too, so it is not always a benefit. For instance, I don't like strange men to hold doors open for me, because sometimes they will use it as an excuse to check out your ass or make conversation (of the skeezy type) and you are expected to put up with this because of the "courtesy" this guy afforded you. I mean, it is hard to say "no thank you" when a man is holding a door for you and you know just looking at him that he isn't doing it to be nice.


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## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

Cosmo....


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## Fozzy (Jul 20, 2013)

As a man who occasionally sees movies by himself, and nearly always holds the door open for women (unless I hate them), this thread makes me uneasy.


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## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

Don't stop opening doors, Fozzy! Please.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Yeah, Fozzy. Don't ever stop opening the doors for ladies. 



Faithful Wife said:


> For instance, I don't like strange men to hold doors open for me, because sometimes they will use it as an excuse to check out your ass or make conversation (of the skeezy type) and you are expected to put up with this because of the "courtesy" this guy afforded you.


I see it differently. If a stranger opens the door for me I always thank them and am happy, whether I know him or not. Sure, he may cop a glance at my ass, but I can't blame him. Hee hee hee. I appreciate courteous favors.


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## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

I appreciate them too, when it is truly courtesy and not creep-town.

I know the difference and have experienced both.

I like the one, not the other.


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

Where I live, there are usually double doors with a foyer in between. So the person who holds the first door open then gets the second door opened for him (or her.) 

When there are single guys at the movies, I usually end up sitting next to them, or vice versa. I've made some good friends that way at the movies. I think it's just perception or personal experience that leads people to think a guy who goes to the movies alone is a perv or a creep. In most metro areas, going to the movies alone is like crapping alone or brushing one's own teeth, it's perfectly normal as a singular activity. Nobody thinks twice of it. Even in NH which is mostly rural, it's not at all unusual or creepy. Being suspicious of single men at the movies is only going to serve one purpose, ruining your enjoyment of watching the movie you just paid to see.


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