# adult nocturnal emissions



## marriedinpei (Jan 15, 2012)

Any married men here have nocturnal emissions / wet dreams? My wife and I were discussing the idea of re-activating non-ejaculatory intercourse [the status quo is nothing!] and I mentioned that I would have to follow up with something - bj, hj or masturbation. She detests giving oral, and while she has offered to give hjs in the past, she is way too rough. She has massaged my prostate in the past, is very good at this and perhaps its time to get back to that. However, she thought that maybe, after a while, if I didn't get any release, that my body would get in a rythum and I'd have a wet dream. Or, maybe after a while, my body would release quicker and easier with intercourse and I'd maybe climax during intercourse without it being a marathon. She also thought that maybe a vibrating butt plug would help me - when I was getting close, turn on the vibrator to give my prostate a buzz [for the record, I love prostate stimulation and I am ok with toys in my backdoor]. She also suggested that I give up masturbation to give this a try and that she would buy me some nice new underwear to wear under my pjs so if I have a wet dream the seminal emissions will be contained.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

How long is "marathon"? As a first step, I'd say give up the masturbation. That should make it easier to climax through intercourse. There's quite a bit of information on the web about guys who can't climax any other way because of "overuse". The degree of pressure you can provide with your hand instead of a vagina can't have compared.

C


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## marriedinpei (Jan 15, 2012)

Marathon for us is 40 plus minutes of continuous intercourse - well, except for applying more lube. She gets sore.


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## anotherguy (Dec 14, 2011)

*"...However, she thought that maybe, after a while, if I didn't get any release, that my body would get in a rythum and I'd have a wet dream. " *

So, her solution is to never climax and to hope that you get sexually pent-up enough that it would result in wet dreams?

I think her suggesting getting your body into some kind of 'rhythm' through lack of satisfying sex is total specualtion on her part, and probably completely wrong as well. Have you ever had a wet dream? If not, I wouldnt hold my breath. Buying new underwear to keep your PJs clean while you wait passively for some sort of subconcious release seems insane. You need to take control of the situation while you are concious.

If your status quo is 'nothing', then I would rather try to find a way to work on that together - unless your ultimate goal here is simply a wet dream - which may contribute zero to your relationship anyway. 

Do you feel masterbation is a contributing factor to your delayed climax? How often are you doing that? Daily? Weekly? Hourly?


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## tjohnson (Mar 10, 2010)

I have not had a wed dream since i was 10 and think even a prolonged (and painful) lack of release would prompt this. 

If you are masturbating fairly regularly, you may consider if your body is becoming used to the way you are doing it and if perhaps if this cannot be replicated in partnered sex may account for the "delay". For me i find if i have a period of arousal before i begin intercourse/oral, that I will usually climax quicker. 

You may find the butt plug thing works. I have experimented with a hitachi magic wand (plug in "massager"). If find if i hold it against the head of my penis firmly, that I climax pretty quickly. Perhaps you could experiment having intercourse with your wife and using this for the "happy ending". 

Good luck. 



After about 5 days from my last rel


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## lonesomegra (Dec 11, 2011)

I am not convinced that abstinence from masturbation helps a great deal. I have gone 40 days without Pam and her 5 sisters and it didn't help me with finishing in my wife's front port. I have read that the woman has a big part to play as if she is not tight enough and if she will not exercise her virginal muscles then there is not a great deal the man can do. If the woman is tight then you might need to seriously consider your penis health. 

Here are some facts I have heard contribute to better penis health:

1. Sleep naked. This allows for freer nocturnal erections and helps the flow of blood in the penis

2. Avoid wearing tight jeans or underware as this can lead to high levels of heat that affect production factors in the testes.

3. Eat small amounts of very high quality, high in Coca content dark chocolate each day. I don't understand the science behind this one but I know it gives a good well being element and being happy has positive effects on the body and libido.

4. Eat small amounts of Blackberry, Bilberry and Blueberry jam. These foods are known to eliminate free radicals and encourage male sperm production.

5. Other factors are to make sure you are not overweight, take baths instead of showers and to eat granola and nut snacks ( if you aren't allergic. )

I know I have researched other aspects of penis health but these are the main ones that stick in my mind.

I also think the rear vibrator is worth a try and I'd be very interested in the result of this experiment.


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## anotherguy (Dec 14, 2011)

lonesomegra said:


> ...I have read that the woman has a big part to play as if she is not tight enough and if she will not exercise her virginal muscles then there is not a great deal the man can do. If the woman is tight then you might need to seriously consider your penis health.


I wouldn't blame your wife - I think, but reading your posts, it is very unlikely vaginal tightness is the problem. 



lonesomegra said:


> Here are some facts I have heard contribute to better penis health:


Facts? 'penis health'? I woulnt regard that list as 'facts' to make you climax faster. Do you know what a 'free radical is', or why getting rid of them would help?

What I would not do is try to self diagnose based upon threads on some website or speculate that eating blackberry jam is going to help your problem. What I think - is that sleeping nude, having your wife do kegel exercises, and buying loose jeans isnt going to make the slightest bit of difference... but Im just guessing. 

Its good that you and your wife are able to talk about it. You mentioned a vibrator a couple times now - if that kind of stimulation is what it takes and your wife is interested in participating...go ahead. 

You did not mention if she has similar concerns regrading her own satisfaction. It is definitely a 2 way street - if she is satisfied and pleasurably motivated - you may find things 'come' a little easier for the both of you hopefully?

If masturbation comes easily for you (or at least more easily), then I'd think about what is different in your head or what kind of stimulation you are using - and worry less about granola and warm baths. Do you think about the same things? You need to be honest with yourself and her, if you want your wife to be able to help. Sounds like she is willing to give you a HJ.. maybe you need to show her a little more clearly what works for you so she does not get 'too rough' - if you can summon up the courage to do so. I know I would be a little uneasy. Perhaps with a little more communication, patience, relaxation and practice...maybe you will have a bit more luck.

I was in Limerick once. I fell in love with the place, and the people.


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## lonesomegra (Dec 11, 2011)

If I had these facts from just one source or if they were being 'lifted' from one website to another I would doubt them but I have read these in books, on health food websites, reputable newspapers and been told some by doctors. I think it would be very boring writing or reading all the back up science here so I have given bare facts. I have a similiar problem to the OP and feel a duty to share. You are welcome to your opinion anotherguy but unless you have firm facts to bebunk what I have written then I'd advise you to post them up rather than trying to ridicule someone who is trying to help. Oh and just for your information I have come across the term free radicals whilst working in the chemical industry making medical pharmaceuticals and I understand the basic 'dumbing down' of terms to explain certain medical conditions.


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