# I thought we were doing better..



## Deguello (Apr 3, 2015)

This is Deguello,I've been hanging back,because I'm trying some different approaches.we have been together since,1970, I am a recovering porn addict that is what caused this C/F, I've been thru counseling, we. Have been thru counseling, I understand it is a trust issue,however after 90 days of enforced celibacy to test me.? We did some negotiating and we agreed that 1-2 times per week was a good compromise,that lasted 1 week, and she said "I did not agree to that " and our sex life spiraled down . Last year we had sex less than 12 times,this year we are holding the line at 3 so far.at one point I was sure she was stepping out with a woman,in the end I was wrong,100 % after they both got out of the hospital and recovered from the injuries, I never did actually confront my Ww,,we had dinner and a serious conversation . 
In any case we had a discussion with just the two of us.I asked if she had any fantasies "no" I took charge,backfired on me. The she said"I'll have sex because it is my marital obligation " that felt a lot like pity sex,it has just gotten worse
Thx 
deguello


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## Casual Observer (Sep 13, 2012)

It may be way too late for this, but worth a look anyway. The sex-starved marriage. A pretty amazing and close-hitting Ted Talk for many of us.


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