# Esther Perel: The secret to desire in a long-term relationship



## CanadianGuy (Jun 17, 2012)

Interesting insights. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sa0RUmGTCYY


----------



## CuddleBug (Nov 26, 2012)

Communication on both sides, even if its out of your comfort zone.

Over time, everyone gets comfy and set in our ways, and the bedroom isn't any different.

Always trying something new, never asking, surprises, not letting yourself go and getting very fat, that will keep it fun.


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Very good. Thanks for posting the link. I'll have to listen to it a few times. There's a lot to learn.


----------



## CanadianGuy (Jun 17, 2012)

EleGirl said:


> Very good. Thanks for posting the link. I'll have to listen to it a few times. There's a lot to learn.


The things she said about being a good partner actually smothering desire definitely made me sit back and think. Yes I've watched it a few times already.


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

CanadianGuy said:


> The things she said about being a good partner actually smothering desire definitely made me sit back and think. Yes I've watched it a few times already.


She talked about a lot of the things that I do that have actually hurt me a lot. Like taking on too much responsibility, giving up too much of myself, argh.


----------



## CanadianGuy (Jun 17, 2012)

EleGirl said:


> She talked about a lot of the things that I do that have actually hurt me a lot. Like taking on too much responsibility, giving up too much of myself, argh.


I can not recall anyone dissecting "desire" quite like she has.


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

CanadianGuy said:


> I can not recall anyone dissecting "desire" quite like she has.


She did a very good job of explaining it all. Like she said, for the first time in history people are expecting so much out of marriage and few know how to carry it off.


----------



## CanadianGuy (Jun 17, 2012)

EleGirl said:


> She did a very good job of explaining it all. Like she said, for the first time in history people are expecting so much out of marriage and few know how to carry it off.


Thus this forum.


----------



## Saki (Dec 7, 2011)

I think the high level of expectations in itself is part of the marriage epidemic right now.

I drastically lowered my expectations of marriage and frankly I'm a hell of a lot happier person because of it!


----------



## CanadianGuy (Jun 17, 2012)

The link had changed so I edited it in the OP for the correct one.


----------



## Loyal Lover (Jan 30, 2013)

Thank you for sharing, very insightful.


----------

