# Fiance threatening to leave if I don't support him finanicially



## lexidavis999 (Oct 31, 2016)

I would request that the moderator please delete this post. I had been locked out before and someone pointed out that I am not ...so I need to return to my screen name. Unfortunately, I am not a troll....wish the story was not true.


----------



## rockon (May 18, 2016)

Seriously? He wants to control you AND your money. To hell with this. The only words you need are good bye!! He is not marriage material (not even boyfriend material).


----------



## lexidavis999 (Oct 31, 2016)

I would request that the moderator please delete this post. I had been locked out before and someone pointed out that I am not ...so I need to return to my screen name. Unfortunately, I am not a troll....wish the story was not true.


----------



## Workathome (Aug 30, 2014)

Your not married and should not be giving him your paycheck. He's showing you who he is. Believe him and RUN as fast as you can away from him!


----------



## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

Who cares how much money you THINK he's going to make? Good lord - give your head a shake here!! This guy is a total a$$. It's just going to get worse!!!

Seriously - read what you posted above and pretend your sister wrote it. What would you tell her? 

The guy is a total control freak - even if he DOES get rich some day do you think you'll see a penny of it?

Cut your losses and RUN FAR FAR AWAY


----------



## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*I'd say to fastly convey to him that if he were so displeased with the events of the status quo, to try not to let the front door hit him in the a$$ whenever he goes to exit!

You're far better off letting some other "sugar mama" go about supporting his childish whims!

You don't really need to be married to someone like that!*
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Aspydad (Oct 17, 2013)

Sorry, but your Fiance is using you!! Why in the heck are you mixing finances prior to marriage?? Do you really think that someone who will treat you like this is going to stick around once they are on their feet?? Red flags here big time!!! You need to disconnect now before he takes you to the cleaners.


----------



## MrsHolland (Jun 18, 2016)

Have you posted this before?


----------



## PhillyGuy13 (Nov 29, 2013)

Do you have children with him?

Do you own property with him?

If no, run. RUN. Hes controlling you this much now, wait until you are married.

now I know, you will say he's a good person and will come up with a laundry list of reasons not to leave him. Sorry, don't want to hear them.

RUN.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## 3Xnocharm (Jun 22, 2012)

Edit...NEVER MIND. I recognize this.


----------



## lexidavis999 (Oct 31, 2016)

I would request that the moderator please delete this post. I had been locked out before and someone pointed out that I am not ...so I need to return to my screen name. Unfortunately, I am not a troll....wish the story was not true.


----------



## PhillyGuy13 (Nov 29, 2013)

lexidavis999 said:


> No children. Just not much left for myself $$$ wise. I am enamored by him but yes..I do feel used.
> 
> The thing is...he prob won't marry me if I stand up to him. He often says (when talking about my paychecks) that he can't be married to someone like me.


Not sure why you are even with him or why this is an issue. Sounds like he doesn't want to marry you and he's a terrible mate anyway.

Are you afraid of being alone?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## lexidavis999 (Oct 31, 2016)

Yes, fear. Fear of the unknown and the sense that I may never find someone better.


----------



## ABHale (Jan 3, 2016)

Why are you with him if he is so abusive. 

Just don't know how to answer this. 

I would say leave this POS and find someone that actually cares for you.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Steve1000 (Nov 25, 2013)

lexidavis999 said:


> Yes, fear. Fear of the unknown and the sense that I may never find someone better.


If you marry him, then you will definitely never have the chance to find someone better.


----------



## PhillyGuy13 (Nov 29, 2013)

There are millions of wonderful single people out there that will make wonderful partners.

Personally, rather be alone than with someone who uses me.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## lexidavis999 (Oct 31, 2016)

Do you really think he doesn't care about me? 

Honestly, I tried telling him that if I were going to be expected to hand over all money etc...that I would want to be married. 

I said it only makes sense that we are a team and we are legally married. 

He immediately said that he felt very scared by my words and urgency to be married and wonders if I am trying to trap him into something. 

I said we need a date at least...he said it won't be years...but, he can't give me a date right now. 

He didn't understand why it was necessary. 

After this fight which turned ugly...he woke up the next morning and wrote on the mirror that he does want to marry me..that he wants me more than anything. 

That's still on the mirror and last night when arguing about money he said...I can't marry someone like this.


----------



## norajane (Feb 7, 2012)

You are wasting your life with this loser. No, he doesn't love you. Yes, you would be FAR, far better off alone than with this guy. Life is short. Stop wasting it.


----------



## 3Xnocharm (Jun 22, 2012)

Sometimes he's the husband, sometimes he's the fiancé...


----------



## tropicalbeachiwish (Jun 1, 2016)

3Xnocharm said:


> Sometimes he's the husband, sometimes he's the fiancé...


Oh. . .


----------



## lexidavis999 (Oct 31, 2016)

I just feel so hurt and quite understand why he spoils me and does amazing things and then threatens me. I think he does want us to work but on his conditions.


----------



## WonkyNinja (Feb 28, 2013)

lexidavis999 said:


> Yes, the thing is ...I believe he will be profitable quite quickly and will probably be doing great within a year...
> 
> *So what? Do you think he's suddenly going to treat you properly then?*
> 
> ...


Technically he doesn't own that computer although with his name on the receipt it might be tough to prove. Forget the computer you just learnt a $2000 lesson that was a bargain at 10x the price. You found out what he is like before it's too late.



lexidavis999 said:


> No children. Just not much left for myself $$$ wise. I am enamored by him but yes..I do feel used.
> 
> The thing is...he prob won't marry me if I stand up to him. He often says (when talking about my paychecks) that he can't be married to someone like me.


Then take him at his word. 



lexidavis999 said:


> Yes, fear. Fear of the unknown and the sense that I may never find someone better.


From what you've said you'll have a really tough time finding someone worse.


----------



## WonkyNinja (Feb 28, 2013)

3Xnocharm said:


> Sometimes he's the husband, sometimes he's the fiancé...


Is this an established troll?

The story sounds too ridiculous to be real in many ways.


----------



## MrsHolland (Jun 18, 2016)

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/genera...cial-abuse-how-bad-feels-pretty-horrible.html


----------



## Chris Taylor (Jul 22, 2010)

Why is there even a discussion about this? The guy is a controlling, abusive a-hole. YOU hold the cards here, not him.

Leave, take care of yourself and you'll be surprised how many non-a-holes are out there.


----------



## prunus (Oct 29, 2016)

lexidavis999 said:


> No children. Just not much left for myself $$$ wise. I am enamored by him but yes..I do feel used.
> 
> The thing is...he prob won't marry me if I stand up to him. He often says (when talking about my paychecks) that he can't be married to someone like me.


That's a good thing. Why would you want to marry a person like this? Do you actually give him your paychecks?


----------



## 3Xnocharm (Jun 22, 2012)

MrsHolland said:


> http://talkaboutmarriage.com/genera...cial-abuse-how-bad-feels-pretty-horrible.html


Thanks Holland, I was just going to go search for this thread...

The thread is still active, so not sure why this new one.


----------



## MrsHolland (Jun 18, 2016)

3Xnocharm said:


> Thanks Holland, I was just going to go search for this thread...


Tis a very cold morning here, public holiday, I am the only one awake in the house. What better thing to do than search through old threads >


----------



## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

I went up into my attic looking for something that could explain this man's behavior.

Hacking and gagging, swiping at cobwebs I found what I was looking for.

My uncle gave me his Bass Fiddle Case, before he died. You have seen them; wide at the bottom narrow at the top.

This one is different. It has a lady with big hips and a naughty smile painted on it.

This is what he thinks of you. You are a walking human-shaped purse.

You have no value outside of the cash that you provide.

No wonder he is divorced. Divorced with two kids in tow. She married a man but got a Carpet Bagger. Life is all about him.

Leave him to himself as did his EX. 

He cannot float in heavy sea water, so heavy is his flabby heart and big load of BS.


----------



## MrsHolland (Jun 18, 2016)

3Xnocharm said:


> Thanks Holland, I was just going to go search for this thread...
> 
> The thread is still active, so not sure why this new one.


There is another thread as well, not sure how long ago it was posted or if it is closed. As to why start a new one??? Maybe to get back to the top of the list? Maybe that is part of the game?


----------



## Prodigal (Feb 5, 2011)

Wash, rinse, repeat. This exact same situation has been posted a number of times before. You are either not authentic, or you are the same person dealing with the same problem. The reason I doubt the authenticity, to some extent, is the story is a bit over the top. Here you are living with a jerk who demands your money and you are afraid to stand up to him. After all, you may not find a "prize" like this dude ever again. 

So, support him financially if you wish. If you want to leave, leave. If you want to hang onto the dream of him hitting the big-time, go for it.


----------



## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

MrsHolland said:


> Have you posted this before?


Weirdo, is this you?

Either ditch the loser with manipulation and control issues or just accept this is the life you've chosen. I can't even fathom, if this situation is real, why you'd want such a creep in your life, much less why you want to rush him to the altar so that you can be legally tied to him and legally liable for whatever debt he runs up.


----------



## Prodigal (Feb 5, 2011)

lexidavis999 said:


> What's my point of posting? Was hoping to get feedback. He can be so mean and angry. I don't know how to deal with it and yes, I want to be able to buy myself some things ...and now I am supporting him and his child support and his house and his cars??? If he leaves in 3 months or if I were to leave ...I would never get any of this money or time back.


^^THIS.^^ Like I said, wash, rinse, repeat. You have been given feedback. YOU choose to support him. And, NO, you won't get the money or time back. So stay and accept it, or take it for the outrageous, downright ridiculous situation it is and LEAVE. Seriously.


----------



## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

*Moderator Warning:*

Anyone identifying another member as a troll in the open forum is breaching the rules.

Please resist the urge to do this.


----------



## Prodigal (Feb 5, 2011)

lexidavis999 said:


> I had been locked out before and someone pointed out that I am not ...so I need to return to my screen name.


Having multiple accounts is a bannable offense; however, if you have just forgotten your previous account information, the moderators here would be glad to assist you.

The thing is, from what I am reading, you have posted about this situation before and you have received feedback. There is only so much feedback and advice you can get for this situation. Now it's up to you to determine whether you stay or go.


----------



## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

@lexidavis999, I have sent you a Personal Message.

Please check your inbox.


----------

