# Are people whose top love language words of affirmation more of a risk to cheat?



## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Discuss...


----------



## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

I think people with little integrity are at a greater risk to cheat. 

Having a strong need for approval, admiration, verbal affirmation, attention, validation, adrenaline rushes, novelty, or any other type of ego stroking, doesn't help. But even people with those needs won't cheat if they have integrity.


----------



## Keke24 (Sep 2, 2016)

I agree with @Rowan. 

Does having a strong need for sex/sexual attention increase one's propensity to cheat? Does needing to be constantly showered with gifts increase one's propensity to cheat? I don't think so.


----------



## Fozzy (Jul 20, 2013)

People who don't get their needs met are more of a risk to cheat.


----------



## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

Fozzy said:


> People who don't get their needs met are more of a risk to cheat.


I do think not getting your needs met can open up more temptation to cheat. But not everyone whose needs are unmet cheats. Poor boundaries and lack of integrity, which sometimes go hand in hand, are also required.


----------



## TX-SC (Aug 25, 2015)

It's one of my top two Love Languages. I do not cheat and I rarely get that need met. I think having poor boundaries leads to cheating. 

Sent from my LG-US996 using Tapatalk


----------



## Fozzy (Jul 20, 2013)

Rowan said:


> I do think not getting your needs met can open up more temptation to cheat. But not everyone whose needs are unmet cheats. Poor boundaries and lack of integrity, which sometimes go hand in hand, are also required.


Agreed. It makes it more likely, not a forgone conclusion.


----------



## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Fozzy said:


> People who don't get their needs met are more of a risk to cheat.


So I believe this is true in combination with the idea that people with poor character and boundaries are more apt to cheat. People with strong moral character and boundaries are much less likely no matter what the circumstance. I believe there are cheaters and non cheaters, I do not subscribe to the theory that everyone is capable of cheating. I think there are a pool of people who are capable in extreme circumstances but for whatever reason avoid it. But there is also a pool of people who no matter what the circumstances won't cheat. Finally there are people who were probably always going to cheat. 

However logically words of affirmation require little effort or investment. Unlike many of the other love languages which require some sort of familiarity to get to the point where the love language is effective. For instance you can't spend quality time with a person if you don't know them well them for instance. Can't just start touching a person you don't know. Anyone can start bombarding people with complements, ones that aren't even true. Not everyone is in the position to provide people with gifts. Also how would you know that they respond to gifts unless you give them some first. Words though are really the easiest of all love languages to give, and probably the most susceptible to abuse. 

So my feeling is assuming you have the first (poor character/boundaries) I believe words of affirmation being your primary love languages makes you a more risky choice. The problem with figuring your partner has the first set of requirements is it's very easy to hide the fact that you don't. 

Taking all that into account my overall conclusion is yes I would be cautious.


----------



## Young at Heart (Jan 6, 2015)

My top love language is touch and my secondary love language is words of affirmation.

In my opinion, because I seek praise is partly why I am a type A personality and strive for success. The main problem with this is that when people, especially my wife, criticize me, it makes me feel very unloved. I see that as the real danger, at least in my marriage.

I have told my wife that if she wants to criticize me, she needs to first tell me that she loves me, touch me and make me feel loved, then in as positive a way as possible tell me what she doesn't like. This has lead to many fights and her telling me that at times she feel she has to walk on egg-shells. 

Does the need for praise make a person more likely to cheat? I don't think so. It does make them more likely to be hurt by their spouse, and I mean deeply emotionally hurt in the course of an argument. That is the real danger that the anger will destroy the emotional closeness to the point that cheating seems an option. I found working long hours to get the praise of my employer and coworkers a substitute.


----------



## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

Of course having unmet needs puts people more at risk, but not everyone who is at risk will cheat. Some will end their relationships, some will just accept their status quo, and some will cheat.

Personally, as someone whose primary needs are words of affirmation and touch, I think touch would be the most difficult to do without while remaining married and faithful. Words of affirmation I can get from friends, family, co-workers, neighbors, church members, etc. without crossing boundaries. Touch is nearly impossible to get without crossing boundaries.


----------



## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

MJJEAN said:


> Personally, as someone whose primary needs are words of affirmation and touch, I think touch would be the most difficult to do without while remaining married and faithful. Words of affirmation I can get from friends, family, co-workers, neighbors, church members, etc. without crossing boundaries. Touch is nearly impossible to get without crossing boundaries.


I think that probably depends on whether "touch" for you means sexual or non-sexual. Chapman doesn't differentiate, whereas Harley does, and I think it may make sense to acknowledge that not everyone who requires "touch" needs the same thing. Touch is one of my primary love languages, but I don't really need that touch to be sexual. I crave non-sexual physical affection - holding hands, hugs, cuddling, etc.. My now-ex-husband had _zero_ interest in any sort of physical affection that wasn't going to result in sex within the next 20 minutes or so. That didn't really work for me, it didn't actually fulfill my need for touch. I actually did pretty well during my marriage getting my need for non-sexual physical affection met by friends, family, even pets. But, yes, it does make it easier to fall in love and stay in love with a partner who is willing to indulge that need. You can't imagine what a turn on it was to discover that my SO is nearly as tactile as I am, and finds that trait to be attractive rather than an irritant! 

But if my need was for sexual physical affection, then yes, I agree it would be nearly impossible to get that need met elsewhere while still remaining faithful.


----------



## naiveonedave (Jan 9, 2014)

Rowan said:


> I think that probably depends on whether "touch" for you means sexual or non-sexual. Chapman doesn't differentiate, whereas Harley does, and I think it may make sense to acknowledge that not everyone who requires "touch" needs the same thing. Touch is one of my primary love languages, but I don't really need that touch to be sexual. I crave non-sexual physical affection - holding hands, hugs, cuddling, etc.. My now-ex-husband had _zero_ interest in any sort of physical affection that wasn't going to result in sex within the next 20 minutes or so. That didn't really work for me, it didn't actually fulfill my need for touch. I actually did pretty well during my marriage getting my need for non-sexual physical affection met by friends, family, even pets. But, yes, it does make it easier to fall in love and stay in love with a partner who is willing to indulge that need. You can't imagine what a turn on it was to discover that my SO is nearly as tactile as I am, and finds that trait to be attractive rather than an irritant!
> 
> But if my need was for sexual physical affection, then yes, I agree it would be nearly impossible to get that need met elsewhere while still remaining faithful.


touch is my #1. I definitely do notice that I need both types of touch. I am able to actually tell that I really need to 'hold hands' at times and others, I really need the sexual part of it. I think this is a tough one for experts to navigate.....


----------



## Jessica38 (Feb 28, 2017)

Not anymore than people who list intimate conversation as a top need. You can either allow others to meet that need outside of the marriage or you can set firm boundaries with the OS to reduce the risk of developing feelings for others.


----------



## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

Rowan said:


> My now-ex-husband had _zero_ interest in any sort of physical affection that wasn't going to result in sex within the next 20 minutes or so. That didn't really work for me, it didn't actually fulfill my need for touch. I actually did pretty well during my marriage getting my need for non-sexual physical affection met by friends, family, even pets. But, yes, it does make it easier to fall in love and stay in love with a partner who is willing to indulge that need. You can't imagine what a turn on it was to discover that my SO is nearly as tactile as I am, and finds that trait to be attractive rather than an irritant!
> 
> *But if my need was for sexual physical affection, then yes, I agree it would be nearly impossible to get that need met elsewhere while still remaining faithful.*


 I would say the physical touching need - when sex/ intimacy is so important (a craving for some of us)-this has to be the most difficult to deal with, or lay down .. if one is wired this way.. and a spouse is not.. can't think of a worse miss match ! I'm actually not a hugger, touchy person much at all (with friends, strangers) .. except with my husband.. then I am terribly affectionate.. 

When my drive was insatiable.. I told my husband point blank.. if he didn't take care of me.. I don't think I could have handled it ... I needed what I needed during that time.. .. I went out of my way to arouse him, to make it FUN for us both, add novelty.... I'd get a little frustrated at times, as he couldn't keep up...even caused him some performance pressure, then we worked through that...

I tried leaving him alone, bought some toys... then he told me to put them all away -to come to him every time... I cried !! He was amazing during that time.. 

Maybe this wasn't so hard for him though. .he's always been a Physical Toucher....we came to learn, taking that love language test >>







 Love Languages Personal Profile 








...our languages were all in the same order.. this didn't surprise me.. though it sure explained why we always got along so well.. I've never felt neglected in these areas...

Though sorry to say.. there was a time he felt neglected - with sex (having too many kids, I had them in bed with us).. stupid!...Looking back.. I was getting a lot of that "Physical touch" from the babies, holding them, kissing them.. 

I do feel anytime our needs are neglected (if that's how we feel.. being a mismatch is difficult !)...it's one of those things.. a couple needs to find what will satisfy both -so they aren't feeling neglected ...some way to live with it... without a growing resentment.... as once Resentment sets in... Temptation is going to be harder to turn away, one will start thinking what is over the fence...it's only natural... a "perfect storm" could take many down...


----------



## DustyDog (Jul 12, 2016)

Probably not...Gottman et al have determined that the initial behavior that usually ends up with a spouse cheating is that they believe their spouse offers no emotional support/connection. However, in follow-up work by Sue Johnson, she determined that ALL people expect emotional support from their spouses, no matter what "love language" they speak.


----------



## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

Rowan said:


> I think that probably depends on whether "touch" for you means sexual or non-sexual. Chapman doesn't differentiate, whereas Harley does, and I think it may make sense to acknowledge that not everyone who requires "touch" needs the same thing. Touch is one of my primary love languages, but I don't really need that touch to be sexual. I crave non-sexual physical affection - holding hands, hugs, cuddling, etc.. My now-ex-husband had _zero_ interest in any sort of physical affection that wasn't going to result in sex within the next 20 minutes or so. That didn't really work for me, it didn't actually fulfill my need for touch. I actually did pretty well during my marriage getting my need for non-sexual physical affection met by friends, family, even pets. But, yes, it does make it easier to fall in love and stay in love with a partner who is willing to indulge that need. You can't imagine what a turn on it was to discover that my SO is nearly as tactile as I am, and finds that trait to be attractive rather than an irritant!
> 
> But if my need was for sexual physical affection, then yes, I agree it would be nearly impossible to get that need met elsewhere while still remaining faithful.


It's best described as intimate touching, I suppose. Not necessarily sexual, but not appropriate touching for friends or family members, either. A hand high up on the thigh while driving. An arm wrapped around my waist, gripping my love handle firmly, while we chat. Stroking and petting while cuddling on the couch. That kind of thing. Of course, kisses, random gropes, make out sessions, and sex are important, too.

I raised 3 kids and have always had a small zoo worth of pets, but cuddling them just isn't enough. I tried subsisting on strictly platonic and familial touching for the last year of my first marriage and during a phase in my current marriage during which DH was working away for days at a time. I get kind of bug nutty crazy cut off from intimate (sexual and non) touch for too long.


----------



## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

sokillme said:


> However logically words of affirmation require little effort or investment. Unlike many of the other love languages which require some sort of familiarity to get to the point where the love language is effective.


Words of affirmation require familiarity to be effective. You can't just give these people any old compliment, and the words required vary from person to person. My husband has words as one of his main ones, but they have to be specific words about specific things for him. Telling him he looks good means nothing to him, but telling him he did something well means a lot more.



MJJEAN said:


> Of course having unmet needs puts people more at risk,


I don't think there's any 'of course' about this. There's having unmet needs, and then there's THINKING you have unmet needs. 



DustyDog said:


> the initial behavior that usually ends up with a spouse cheating is that they *believe* their spouse offers no emotional support/connection.


 I think the bolded word is key. Perception is everything. If I'm the best wife in the world, give the best blow jobs, dress sexy, earn money, whatever he wants, but he has decided he's missing something, then nothing I do is going to change that. 

As for the original question, I don't think having the need for words unmet confers any more of a propensity for cheating than having any other unmet need. It's easy for someone to say their spouse didn't meet their needs and so they cheated. But that's bull****. If your spouse isn't meeting your needs, TALK to them. Or divorce them. Don't just think that gives you a free pass to cheat. That's the chicken**** way out.


----------



## katiecrna (Jan 29, 2016)

Words of affirmation can simple mean being verbally appreciated. Or it could mean a constant need to be praised, while not hearing any criticism at all and needing to think everything they do is right and good. 
I think people who can't handle or hear criticism and need to be praised all the time... to me this can really cause you to pull away from your spouse and seek praise elsewhere. They are ego seekers. Who could be suffering from insecurity and low self esteem. 

Words of affirmation is a tricky one... everyone likes to be appreciated. But the need to be praised and adored imo stems from a deeper issue.


----------



## katiecrna (Jan 29, 2016)

Young at Heart said:


> My top love language is touch and my secondary love language is words of affirmation.
> 
> In my opinion, because I seek praise is partly why I am a type A personality and strive for success. The main problem with this is that when people, especially my wife, criticize me, it makes me feel very unloved. I see that as the real danger, at least in my marriage.
> 
> ...




You remind me of my husband. It's good to hear your perspective


----------



## DustyDog (Jul 12, 2016)

Hope1964;17793105
I think the bolded word is key ([B said:


> believe [/B]to not be emotionally supported). Perception is everything. If I'm the best wife in the world, give the best blow jobs, dress sexy, earn money, whatever he wants, but he has decided he's missing something, then nothing I do is going to change that.


I politely disagree. In every course I've taken, or book I've read, the communications sections have emphasized active listening. In active listening mode, you ask a lot of questions. When your partner speaks, you say things like "do you mean xxx?" - it's about making sure you are listening fully and properly interpreting. If you speak a 20-word sentence to ten people - there will be ten separate messages received! So it's important to get this feedback loop working.

On a regular basis, many of these books/counselors suggest asking your spouse "Am I doing OK? Is there anything I'm not providing that you need?" I think it's grand. Used to work with my various past LTRs and SOs...not with present wife. She thinks it's a weak and whiny question.


----------



## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Hope1964 said:


> Words of affirmation require familiarity to be effective.


No they don't. You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. I love that dress. You really ran that presentation well today. blah blah blah.


----------



## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

katiecrna said:


> Words of affirmation can simple mean being verbally appreciated. Or it could mean a constant need to be praised, while not hearing any criticism at all and needing to think everything they do is right and good.
> I think people who can't handle or hear criticism and need to be praised all the time... to me this can really cause you to pull away from your spouse and seek praise elsewhere. They are ego seekers. Who could be suffering from insecurity and low self esteem.
> 
> Words of affirmation is a tricky one... everyone likes to be appreciated. But the need to be praised and adored imo stems from a deeper issue.


I agree with this which is also why I think it is risky.


----------



## Young at Heart (Jan 6, 2015)

DustyDog said:


> Probably not...Gottman et al have determined that the initial behavior that usually ends up with a spouse cheating is that they believe their spouse offers no emotional support/connection. However, in follow-up work by Sue Johnson, she determined that ALL people expect emotional support from their spouses, no matter what "love language" they speak.


This is a very good discussion. Sue Johnson's book Touch Me is about physcial touch more than sexual touch. I feel that Chapman's 5 LL Touch is about physical touch as well. I feel that sex can be worked in to just about any of Chapman's 5 LL's, Presents (love cards), Act of Service, quality time (think aftercare), Touch (erotic massage with Happy Ending), and Words of Affirmation (positive "uplifting" dirty talk).

In a Gottman's Art and Science of Love weekend, they really preach the need to a long kiss and hug each day.

Yes, it is about emotional support, but that can be given in almost any love languages as can sex.

The original question is focused on words of affirmation. I think a healthy marriage requires compromise and give and take. For many of us, words of "negative affirmation" can destroy a relationship faster than just about anything else out there. 

The giving of negative presents, the giving of negative acts of service don't seem as likely to cause cheating in my opinion as negative affirmations, negative touch (aka withholding all physical touch (or giving physcial abuse), or negative quality time (being mean and cruel or as David Schnarch would say Marital Sadism).


----------



## katiecrna (Jan 29, 2016)

sokillme said:


> I agree with this which is also why I think it is risky.




The problem is, most people don't know their spouses love language before they are married. And by the time they know it, they may be in to deep.


----------



## Young at Heart (Jan 6, 2015)

katiecrna said:


> Words of affirmation can simple mean being verbally appreciated. Or it could mean a constant need to be praised, while not hearing any criticism at all and needing to think everything they do is right and good.
> I think people who can't handle or hear criticism and need to be praised all the time... to me this can really cause you to pull away from your spouse and seek praise elsewhere. They are ego seekers. Who could be suffering from insecurity and low self esteem.
> 
> Words of affirmation is a tricky one... everyone likes to be appreciated. But the need to be praised and adored imo stems from a deeper issue.


I would say that for words of affirmation to really make one feel loved, they need to be relevant and on target. As another said they require a degree of both familiarity and a degree of understanding. 

The same is true for words of negative affirmation. If they are on target they can deeply hurt a person. A spouse knows their significant others strong and weak points. In anger they can emotionally wound their spouse. When my marriage was in a sex starved mode, my wife said things to me that I felt bordered on emotional abuse. She knew me and she was struggling to maintain emotional distance from me as she still loved me. The easiest way for her to maintain her emotional distance from me was to pick a fight with me and get an argument going. She was very good at pushing me emotionally away from her. I didn't cheat, but thought a lot about it at the time.

I think that those whose primary love language is words of affirmation probably don't cheat anymore than others, but it would not surprise me if they divorce more, especially if their spouse is clueless about love languages. I came very close to divorcing my wife.


----------



## Mostlycontent (Apr 16, 2014)

katiecrna said:


> Words of affirmation can simple mean being verbally appreciated. Or it could mean a constant need to be praised, while not hearing any criticism at all and needing to think everything they do is right and good.
> I think people who can't handle or hear criticism and need to be praised all the time... to me this can really cause you to pull away from your spouse and seek praise elsewhere. They are ego seekers. Who could be suffering from insecurity and low self esteem.
> 
> Words of affirmation is a tricky one... everyone likes to be appreciated. But the need to be praised and adored imo stems from a deeper issue.



I completely disagree with this position. With all due respect, I believe you have grossly misrepresented what "Words of Affirmation" even means. 

It means that the person needs to hear they are loved (in words) and appreciated (in words) for what they do or who they are. I was raised in a home where everyone was very verbal. If you looked nice, you were told so. If you performed a task well, you were told so. If you did well in school and received a good grade, you were told so. I understand that other home environments were not like that. I certainly don't think it means that a person needs to be continually praised all the time. That view presents the love language as some kind of character defect

Your love language may be "Acts of Service", for example. That happens to be my wife's primary love language. When she's going out of town the next day, I will often take her car and fill up the tank or get her tires checked the day before. I do this because I know that is how she receives love and best demonstrates for her that I love her. Her family was not verbal but rather did things for one another.

This could also be grossly misrepresented if I characterized it as me having to jump through hoops for her in order to demonstrate my love or if I felt like I had to do this thing or that thing in order to satisfy her. That would be no different than how you characterized "Words of Affirmation".

Of course, everyone wants to feel adequately considered, appreciated and loved. Any of them could lead to complete abuse as well, depending on the emotional well being of the person, but none of them are wrong in any way. 

I also don't think that having any one of them as a primary love language is likely to make that person more or less likely to cheat.


----------



## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Young at Heart said:


> I would say that for words of affirmation to really make one feel loved, they need to be relevant and on target. As another said they require a degree of both familiarity and a degree of understanding.


Any person with a high level of emotional intelligence can do usually figure this out after spending some time with someone. Working with someone for instance. Most insecure people tell you what they are insecure about if you listen to them. I stand by my hypothesis. People with poor self-esteem, shaky morals and boundaries and who are whose primary love language is WOA are like fish in a barrel for people looking to pray upon them. Kind of hard to spend quality time with the women from work who is married. Not that hard to tell her how beautiful she is. 

Granted they have to have the first part though poor self-esteem, poor morals and such.


----------



## katiecrna (Jan 29, 2016)

Mostlycontent said:


> I completely disagree with this position. With all due respect, I believe you have grossly misrepresented what "Words of Affirmation" even means.
> 
> 
> 
> ...




I understand what your saying. I think the point I was trying to make was that with words of affirmation it can be on a spectrum. Some only need to hear they are appreciated, while others not only need to hear appreciation but they can't hear negative comments, or criticism. Because like saying "thanks for doing that for me!" Makes them feel loved, saying "babe you forgot to take out the garbage", or "it hurts my feelings when you say x,y,z"... makes them feel unappreciated and even unloved. That's more what I'm talking about. My husband cannot hear anything he did wrong, he takes it so personal and he can't separate DOING something wrong vs, HE is wrong. 
I was raised in a way we're we all make mistakes and we all mess up because we're human it's not big deal. My husband was raised in a place where there was no criticism, all this fake positivity crap. His family rug swept everything and there was never issues and everything was fine and no one talked about it or was held accountable. Now I say something to him and you would think I told him he's a terrible person! And he says to me all the time... katie I'm not a bad person you know. And I'm like babe, all I'm saying is you forgot to take out the garbage it's not that serious.


----------



## katiecrna (Jan 29, 2016)

I love words of affirmation. I love verbal appreciation. But criticism doesn't bother me at all. I don't take things too personal.


----------



## katiecrna (Jan 29, 2016)

sokillme said:


> Any person with a high level of emotional intelligence can do usually figure this out after spending some time with someone. Working with someone for instance. Most insecure people tell you what they are insecure about if you listen to them. I stand by my hypothesis. People with poor self-esteem, shaky morals and boundaries and who are whose primary love language is WOA are like fish in a barrel for people looking to pray upon them. Kind of hard to spend quality time with the women from work who is married. Not that hard to tell her how beautiful she is.
> 
> 
> 
> Granted they have to have the first part though poor self-esteem, poor morals and such.




This is a very interesting take and obviously offensive to those whose love language is WOA. 

I would say that WOA is my second love language. It's nice to Hear appreciation sometimes. It's nice to hear my spouse say something nice about me to other people. I love that. I don't think I need that to feel loved, but it differently makes me feel loved. 
But to go with your theory, I am a little insecure, especially with my marriage and my husbands love for me and maybe that's why I like to hear it. But it only means something to me coming from my husband. I am not at all a people pleaser, and need to be praised by others. 

I think it's the people pleasers, WOA, need constant praise, attention needy, ego stroking people that you speak of that can't handle criticism that are like the worst lol. I think you can have your love language be WOA without being like those people. That's a whole other personality trait.


----------



## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

sokillme said:


> blah blah blah.


This is the only part of your post that's accurate. Platitudes are meaningless.


----------



## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Hope1964 said:


> This is the only part of your post that's accurate. Platitudes are meaningless.


To you, but not to people who thrive off of WOA. They are actually one of the most important ways they connect emotionally with others.


----------



## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

katiecrna said:


> This is a very interesting take and obviously offensive to those whose love language is WOA.
> 
> I would say that WOA is my second love language. It's nice to Hear appreciation sometimes. It's nice to hear my spouse say something nice about me to other people. I love that. I don't think I need that to feel loved, but it differently makes me feel loved.
> But to go with your theory, I am a little insecure, especially with my marriage and my husbands love for me and maybe that's why I like to hear it. But it only means something to me coming from my husband. I am not at all a people pleaser, and need to be praised by others.
> ...


Which is why I made it a point to say the danger comes with a person of low morals and character. Even someone with low self-esteem if they have good character will not move to the dark side. But the combination of both low character and a high need for WOA to me is a disaster waiting to happen, because again it is so easy to give WOA without much effort. It doesn't have to be authentic, all they are is words. This is extreme of course, yes there needs to be other stuff too. Just saying you are hot, is not enough except in the very extreme but it does happen. However I do think it leaves people who have these qualities vulnerable. Go look at the WS section of SI and you will see most of those people have these issues and the affair usually starts with WOA.


----------



## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

DustyDog said:


> many of these books/counselors suggest asking your spouse "Am I doing OK? Is there anything I'm not providing that you need?" I think it's grand. Used to work with my various past LTRs and SOs...not with present wife. She thinks it's a weak and whiny question.


My husband NEVER answers these types of questions truthfully. EVER. Practicing 'active listening' with him is like talking to a parrot. One that is NOT funny.


----------



## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

sokillme said:


> To you, but not to people who thrive off of WOA. They are actually one of the most important ways they connect emotionally with others.


People who do this only THINK they're connecting.

Look, if you want to think that words of affirmation neediness predicts cheating then by all means. I just don't agree with you


----------

