# I've lost interest



## EonBlue (Jun 6, 2017)

I'm unhappy in my marriage, and I just realized fairly recently that I want out.

I have always been unhappy with our sex life. My husband was a virgin when we got together, which is fine. I figured he would catch on and we'd develop a great sex life. But there's something about sex he has never "gotten", it's the subtle, unteachable things like passion and enthusiasm. He is never relaxed, he never lets loose and enjoys himself or me. There have always been issues with ED. At first it was light and not a big deal. He could perform ok and when it was required. But there has always been a rush to get it over with before he looses his erection. There has never been time for extended sex. If I want to orgasm it has to be "after" with the help of a toy.

Early on, sex was passable, though. I have had issues with depression in the past and sex was never a priority for me. Sex between us has literally tapered off to once, maybe twice a year. I have been growing more and more disgruntled as time goes on. 

About six months ago I got a new job that I really love. A lot of anxiety I was carrying around with me went away, and these past couple of months my sex drive has been through the roof. I suddenly need much, much more than what my husband can give me.

Over the years we've tried pills, I've bought him videos, underlined passages in books sent him emails of websites and told him -explicitly- "this is what I need". He has had his testosterone tested and his Dr put him on an antidepressant. I don't know if what I'm missing really is just unteachable or if he's being dismissive and lazy. The only thing we haven't tried is sex counseling, and that's pretty much because I'm losing interest in investing anymore effort.

It's not just sex that makes me weary of marriage. He has horrible personal hygiene (again, we've talked until I'm blue in the face about it, nothing changes). He does not take care of himself physically, and he has already run up one huge ER bill for high blood pressure. He whines about EVERYTHING. I can't even have a conversation with him anymore, all he does is ***** about everything he hates.

All anyone ever sees of him though is what a sweet, great guy he is. I feel like I'm evil for not being happy with him. I feel angry at him, but he's never been mean or a jerk to me. I have been with him over 10 years now, being patient and understanding and a good, supportive wife. But all this patience and support makes me feel more like a mommy than a wife. 😣


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## BioFury (Jul 9, 2015)

EonBlue said:


> I'm unhappy in my marriage, and I just realized fairly recently that I want out.
> 
> I have always been unhappy with our sex life. My husband was a virgin when we got together, which is fine. I figured he would catch on and we'd develop a great sex life. But there's something about sex he has never "gotten", it's the subtle, unteachable things like passion and enthusiasm. He is never relaxed, he never lets loose and enjoys himself or me. There have always been issues with ED. At first it was light and not a big deal. He could perform ok and when it was required. But there has always been a rush to get it over with before he looses his erection. There has never been time for extended sex. If I want to orgasm it has to be "after" with the help of a toy.
> 
> ...


He sounds overweight, is he? If so, how long has he been that way? What are the side effects of all the medications that he's on?

Sex counseling would be worth a shot. Does he look at porn?


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## EonBlue (Jun 6, 2017)

BioFury said:


> He sounds overweight, is he? If so, how long has he been that way? What are the side effects of all the medications that he's on?
> 
> Sex counseling would be worth a shot. Does he look at porn?


Yes, he's overweight. And yes, he looks at porn.

I have hit a wall, honestly. I am ANGRY and I don't WANT to do counseling with him.


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## BioFury (Jul 9, 2015)

EonBlue said:


> Yes, he's overweight. And yes, he looks at porn.
> 
> I have hit a wall, honestly. I am ANGRY and I don't WANT to do counseling with him.


I understand how you feel. Have you considered going to a marital counselor by yourself? You could vent your feelings about what's going on, and they could give you some ideas on how to go forward. It's important that you assuage your anger, so you don't act out of rage.

Him being overweight is a problem. Fat on the gut cripples testosterone, which obviously impacts his sex drive. The porn is also not helping.

You say that you've talked ad nauseam, so my advice would be to give him an ultimatum. But I would wait until after you've taken care of your feelings of anger, and gone to a counselor.


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## jld (Dec 1, 2013)

EonBlue said:


> Yes, he's overweight. And yes, he looks at porn.
> 
> *I have hit a wall, honestly. I am ANGRY and I don't WANT to do counseling with him*.


It sounds like you know you want a divorce. What is stopping you?


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## EonBlue (Jun 6, 2017)

BioFury said:


> I understand how you feel. Have you considered going to a marital counselor by yourself? You could vent your feelings about what's going on, and they could give you some ideas on how to go forward. It's important that you assuage your anger, so you don't act out of rage.
> 
> Him being overweight is a problem. Fat on the gut cripples testosterone, which obviously impacts his sex drive. The porn is also not helping.
> 
> You say that you've talked ad nauseam, so my advice would be to give him an ultimatum. But I would wait until after you've taken care of your feelings of anger, and gone to a counselor.


Thank you. For some reason I feel like I have to take all the responsibility and all the blame in my marriage. He's good at pulling the "poor, scared,heartbroken me" act when I show him anger. I don't know if it's a ploy or if he's actually scared of me. Either way, it's not attractive. 
I have a counselor I see off and on for my depression/anxiety issues. I will set up an appointment first thing tomorrow morning. I was surprised by my feelings of anger - I didn't realize it was there until I wrote everything out.


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## BioFury (Jul 9, 2015)

EonBlue said:


> Thank you. For some reason I feel like I have to take all the responsibility and all the blame in my marriage. He's good at pulling the "poor, scared,heartbroken me" act when I show him anger. I don't know if it's a ploy or if he's actually scared of me. Either way, it's not attractive.
> I have a counselor I see off and on for my depression/anxiety issues. I will set up an appointment first thing tomorrow morning. I was surprised by my feelings of anger - I didn't realize it was there until I wrote everything out.


Was he always like that? What does he do for work? Can you think of any way that your husband embodies strength and leadership? What drew you to him when you were dating?

Good, it should help to get everything off your chest. A massage might be another good idea.


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## EonBlue (Jun 6, 2017)

jld said:


> It sounds like you know you want a divorce. What is stopping you?


The realization that I'm feeling done only hit me about two weeks ago or so. I moved across the country to be with my husband, and a move "home" is going to take planning and time. I have passed a certification for my career, but it's going to take more time and effort to build experience where someone would actually pay me to do the work. My mom has room for me to stay at her place, but it's unavailable to me right now. I don't have anyone just down the street I can stay with and cool off for a couple of weeks. They may sound like excuses, but for me they're real roadblocks that need to be considered.


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## Buddy400 (Aug 30, 2014)

EonBlue said:


> About six months ago I got a new job that I really love.





EonBlue said:


> I have passed a certification for my career, but it's going to take more time and effort to build experience where someone would actually pay me to do the work.


Hmmm.. does your new job pay now?

He's had plenty of chances and failed to step up to the plate.

You don't owe him anything.

But, stuff like having a job and getting paid are going to be real important soon.

He seems like a decent enough (if dense) guy, try not to damage him too badly financially.


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## cc48kel (Apr 5, 2017)

Could've wrote some from your post myself.. That's what I told my therapist he is going to work everyday, bills are being paid, he helps with kids BUT our communication is way off. So should I bolt or just put up with it until kids go to college. Our sex life is non existent!! And the last few months I believe that I have developed anxiety because 'things' are just not right and I can't fix it!.. His worries (about life) are tough to ignore and I feel more as a mom to him than anything. He also complains a lot when 'things' don't go his way and picks his nose and fingers often which is really gross. 


That's great that you have a job that you like. Have you tried marriage counseling? Maybe they could help him realize that you need more and perhaps he could start working on himself. Ours told us to do more things together and to continue MC once a week-- Nothing has changed-- he still thinks are marriage is fine. Perhaps, staying busy outside the home will get his attention.


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## Spicy (Jun 18, 2016)

Bad personal hygiene. Ewwww.
Was he like that and overweight when you married him?
How old are you both, and do you have kids?


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

EonBlue said:


> I'm unhappy in my marriage, and I just realized fairly recently that I want out.
> 
> I have always been unhappy with our sex life. My husband was a virgin when we got together, which is fine. I figured he would catch on and we'd develop a great sex life. But there's something about sex he has never "gotten", it's the subtle, unteachable things like passion and enthusiasm. He is never relaxed, he never lets loose and enjoys himself or me. There have always been issues with ED. At first it was light and not a big deal. He could perform ok and when it was required. But there has always been a rush to get it over with before he looses his erection. There has never been time for extended sex. If I want to orgasm it has to be "after" with the help of a toy.
> 
> ...


Print ^this^ out and let him read it.


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## EonBlue (Jun 6, 2017)

BioFury said:


> Was he always like that? What does he do for work? Can you think of any way that your husband embodies strength and leadership? What drew you to him when you were dating?


I was initially attracted to him because he's very kind and understanding. I was a few years out from a bad relationship and didn't want to make the same mistakes twice. 

He has always been passive and submissive. In the beginning we had issues with his parents trying to control our lives. 

He works in data processing. He hates it and constantly complains about his job. I have tried to engage him and get him interested in maybe finding a better career path, but he does nothing. 

The only time I have seen him display any sort of strength was once, when I went to a driving range with him. He is able to hit golf balls with confidence and aggression. I literally was astounded - I didn't know he had it in him.


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## EonBlue (Jun 6, 2017)

Buddy400 said:


> Hmmm.. does your new job pay now?
> 
> He's had plenty of chances and failed to step up to the plate.
> 
> ...


My job pays. It is considered entry-level but it's in the industry I want to be in. I am planning on purchasing another training course and maybe doing some volunteering for experience. I could not support myself on what I make now. I don't feel I can just up and leave right now. Plus, this whole separation thing is pretty new to me.


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## EonBlue (Jun 6, 2017)

Spicy said:


> Bad personal hygiene. Ewwww.
> Was he like that and overweight when you married him?
> How old are you both, and do you have kids?


The hygiene and weight fluctuate. Sometimes it's better than others. I am 38, he is 39. We have no kids, TG.


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## Radch1988 (Jun 3, 2017)

Hi there, sorry you're here. 

I think that maybe you need to focus on your own happiness first and foremost. 

I'm going through a different set of circumstances but needless to say being unhappy in a relationship will eventually lead you down a path of resentment with both your partner and yourself. 

I would try and work everything out if the love is there.

However if you have tried everything and he refuses to put in the effort himself then you will lose respect and ultimately love for him. You're both young and have no children. Count this as a blessing. 

Marriage is not always easy and there can be rough times but don't lie to yourself if it's not working for you. Life is just too short. 

Whatever the future holds I hope it's one that works out the best....for you. 


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## BioFury (Jul 9, 2015)

EonBlue said:


> I was initially attracted to him because he's very kind and understanding. I was a few years out from a bad relationship and didn't want to make the same mistakes twice.
> 
> He has always been passive and submissive. In the beginning we had issues with his parents trying to control our lives.
> 
> ...


How did the session with your counselor go?

So if I'm hearing you correctly, you need someone that possess strength and confidence? Other than golf, what are some things your husband is good at? Not necessarily confident in, but competent/skilled.


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## EonBlue (Jun 6, 2017)

BioFury said:


> How did the session with your counselor go?
> 
> So if I'm hearing you correctly, you need someone that possess strength and confidence? Other than golf, what are some things your husband is good at? Not necessarily confident in, but competent/skilled.


I haven't seen the counselor yet, I have an apt for next week. 

I don't know what else my husband would be good at - all he does is play computer/video games. I think he's good at carpentry and building stuff. If you're going to suggest I try to get him interested in hobbies to build his self confidence, BTDT. 

I have literally spent years being his counselor and mommy, trying to get him to be his best self because, yes, I do need a strong man and a leader (or at least someone who is willing to lead SOME of the time). It comes down to am I trying to help him or change him? I don't want to be the kind of wife who sees her husband as a project.

He has taken up one new hobby - collecting toys from his childhood. That would be fine in and of itself, but given his past record of being passive and weak, it greatly annoys me. It seems he's focused on remaining a child when I am left alone needing a partner and a grown adult man.


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## ABHale (Jan 3, 2016)

Sounds like you went from one extreme to the other. 

He has to want to change or this is who he is and just can't. 

Some guys are just like this.


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

At some point which could be tomorrow, next week, next year etc, you are going to encounter a fit, Zhealthy, clean, sexy, ambitious hunk that will give anything to ride you like Secretariat every day. 

You can either meet him as a free and single woman. Or you can meet him as a woman married to a boat anchor and deal with complexities of an affair or trying to keep him interested and on the hook until you can get disentangled from your marriage at that time.


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## EonBlue (Jun 6, 2017)

Maybe I am nitpicking here or being too sensitive, but I find myself really ticked off at my H for last night. I woke up Friday morning with a cold and sore throat. We're very busy at work, so I went in anyway and worked a full day. Usually I do grocery shopping Friday after work, but I was feeling too sick and came straight home instead. Usually we eat something together, but because I'm home late Fridays we do our own thing for dinner, so I made myself something to eat and went to bed.

Saturday I literally slept all day. I had some breakfast in the morning, showered and went back to bed. I thought I'd rest and read a bit, but I completely conked back out. I woke up around 2 and had some peanut butter, then laid down again and slept till 6. I went down to the kitchen, figuring my h had planned and fixed dinner for us since he knew I was sick and out of it all day. He was microwaving an individual meal for himself and commented that - wow, I had slept all day. 

Seriously? You can't get off your ass from your video games and cook something for your sick wife?? WTF?? I had to go get dressed and go to the damn grocery store sick to pick up food and make something for myself. 

Am I making a huge deal out of nothing, or just looking for things to be mad at?? I have this huge need to micromanage dinner - I have to set a menu, buy ingredients, and decide what we're having when. My idiot husband gets home home from work before me, so he will actually cook the food. But God forbid I ever ask him what he wants for dinner - he is not up to making those sorts of decisions. Now I see I have this need to micromanage because apparently if I don't I will not EAT.


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

EonBlue said:


> Maybe I am nitpicking here or being too sensitive, but I find myself really ticked off at my H for last night. I woke up Friday morning with a cold and sore throat. We're very busy at work, so I went in anyway and worked a full day. Usually I do grocery shopping Friday after work, but I was feeling too sick and came straight home instead. Usually we eat something together, but because I'm home late Fridays we do our own thing for dinner, so I made myself something to eat and went to bed.
> 
> Saturday I literally slept all day. I had some breakfast in the morning, showered and went back to bed. I thought I'd rest and read a bit, but I completely conked back out. I woke up around 2 and had some peanut butter, then laid down again and slept till 6. I went down to the kitchen, figuring my h had planned and fixed dinner for us since he knew I was sick and out of it all day. He was microwaving an individual meal for himself and commented that - wow, I had slept all day.
> 
> ...


I'll give you a husband's perspective on this one specific event. 

I would not have fixed anything either.

You were sick in bed all day and sick people have significant changes to their appetite and there was no way on God's Green Earth that he would have had the slightest idea on what you would want or what you would even eat if he had fixed it. 

If my wife were sick, I would never in a million years try to guess what she would eat and I would never fix anything and then have her reject it. 

You are off base on this one. 

Had he tried to guess what you would eat and he happened to guess wrong, you would have complained about him fixing that. He was in a no-win scenario on this one. 

Now I would ask my wife if she wanted something in particular and if she were to tell me what she wanted, I would have fixed that. But there is no way in hell I would ever try to guess or assume what a sick person would or would not eat. 

You may have some legitimate grievances in your relationship, but this particular incident is not one of them.


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## Elizabeth001 (May 18, 2015)

He should have asked her how she was feeling and if there was anything he could fix for her that she was up to eating or drinking. 


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

EonBlue;18027010
Am I making a huge deal out of nothing said:


> I think you have reached a level of dissatisfaction and frustration to where it has crossed over into toxicity.
> 
> In essence, he can't do anything right.
> 
> ...


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

Elizabeth001 said:


> He should have asked her how she was feeling and if there was anything he could fix for her that she was up to eating or drinking.
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


For all we know he may have. He may have but she *****ed him out for bothering her or not letting her rest. 

That's kind of my point to my previous post. We can all sit here and say "couldaa/shouldda/wouldda" but she is at a point where nothing he tries, says or does is good enough and she will complain about it regardless of what he does.


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## dolphindad50 (Jun 11, 2017)

My wife has no sex drive. He doesn't understand how nice he has it.


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## lorikeet25 (Jun 22, 2016)

I agree about not cooking for someone who is feeling ill. I was thinking she was overreacting right up to the part where she had to drag her sick butt to the grocery store to get food for her dinner. HE should have done that. 

Maybe he offered? But it sounds like OP just really doesn't like him anymore, and I doubt there is much he does that won't annoy her.


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

lorikeet25 said:


> I agree about not cooking for someone who is feeling ill. I was thinking she was overreacting right up to the part where she had to drag her sick butt to the grocery store to get food for her dinner. HE should have done that.
> 
> Maybe he offered? But it sounds like OP just really doesn't like him anymore, and I doubt there is much he does that won't annoy her.


 But did she really "have" to do that herself or did she just do it because she was mad and could use it as ammo against him afterwards.


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## BioFury (Jul 9, 2015)

EonBlue said:


> Maybe I am nitpicking here or being too sensitive, but I find myself really ticked off at my H for last night. I woke up Friday morning with a cold and sore throat. We're very busy at work, so I went in anyway and worked a full day. Usually I do grocery shopping Friday after work, but I was feeling too sick and came straight home instead. Usually we eat something together, but because I'm home late Fridays we do our own thing for dinner, so I made myself something to eat and went to bed.
> 
> Saturday I literally slept all day. I had some breakfast in the morning, showered and went back to bed. I thought I'd rest and read a bit, but I completely conked back out. I woke up around 2 and had some peanut butter, then laid down again and slept till 6. I went down to the kitchen, figuring my h had planned and fixed dinner for us since he knew I was sick and out of it all day. He was microwaving an individual meal for himself and commented that - wow, I had slept all day.
> 
> ...





oldshirt said:


> I'll give you a husband's perspective on this one specific event.
> 
> I would not have fixed anything either.
> 
> ...


You have a point, but I disagree to some respect. Like you, I would not have just fixed something. But, I would have gone in there, woken here up with a glass of water or something, and asked her if she was hungry.

That said, I do get distracted rather easily, and perhaps he does too. If for some reason, it had totally slipped my mind, I would have taken the reins once she woke up and started getting ready for the store. It would be apparent to anyone with a brain that you had screwed up at that point, and that she needs you to do dinner, and let her rest.


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

BioFury said:


> You have a point, but I disagree to some respect. Like you, I would not have just fixed something. But, I would have gone in there, woken here up with a glass of water or something, and asked her if she was hungry.
> 
> That said, I do get distracted rather easily, and perhaps he does too. If for some reason, it had totally slipped my mind, I would have taken the reins once she woke up and started getting ready for the store. It would be apparent to anyone with a brain that you had screwed up at that point, and that she needs you to do dinner, and let her rest.


I get that.

And that is how any normal person in a healthy and mutual appreciative and loving relationship would do and how they would see things. 

But this isn't a normal, healthy, loving relationship. She does not love, respect or appreciate him and she does not believe that he respects or appreciates her. 

In your scenario above, she would have likely been mad he woke her up and insulted that all he brought her was water. 

Do y'all see what I'm getting at?? No matter what he would have done or how he did it, it would not have been good enough or the right thing.

The core issue here isn't how he treated her when she was sick. The issue is the relationship has broke down so much that she no longer has any respect, faith or confidence in him as a husband. 

This is a relationship issue and not care giving or nursing issue. 

He could have fixed steak and lobster and brought home a $400 bottle of champainge and she would have complained that that is not what you feed a sick person and that he wasted good money. 

Once you lose respect, confidence and attraction for someone, nothing they do will be good enough.


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## Elizabeth001 (May 18, 2015)

oldshirt said:


> But did she really "have" to do that herself or did she just do it because she was mad and could use it as ammo against him afterwards.




Maybe she was hungry? I don't understand why you are so negative. A personal button get pushed?

OP: get your a$$ out of this marriage. If you stay, you have no one to blame but yourself. 


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## farsidejunky (Mar 19, 2014)

oldshirt said:


> I get that.
> 
> And that is how any normal person in a healthy and mutual appreciative and loving relationship would do and how they would see things.
> 
> ...


QFT.

This is what happens when a loss of respect leads to (mis)judging intentions rather than evaluating the actions themselves.


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

EonBlue said:


> Maybe I am nitpicking here or being too sensitive, but I find myself really ticked off at my H for last night. I woke up Friday morning with a cold and sore throat. We're very busy at work, so I went in anyway and worked a full day. Usually I do grocery shopping Friday after work, but I was feeling too sick and came straight home instead. Usually we eat something together, but because I'm home late Fridays we do our own thing for dinner, so I made myself something to eat and went to bed.
> 
> Saturday I literally slept all day. I had some breakfast in the morning, showered and went back to bed. I thought I'd rest and read a bit, but I completely conked back out. I woke up around 2 and had some peanut butter, then laid down again and slept till 6. I went down to the kitchen, figuring my h had planned and fixed dinner for us since he knew I was sick and out of it all day. He was microwaving an individual meal for himself and commented that - wow, I had slept all day.
> 
> ...


Yeah, you're making a big deal out of nothing. You slept all weekend. Why would he expect you to wake up for dinner?

The problem is that you have now gone into your 'I don't like him' mode so everything he does it getting picked apart.

As for your overall problem, honestly, the only thing that's going to make a difference is you moving out and moving on. MAYBE at that point he'll miss you enough to get off his ass and fix himself. But maybe he won't. Either way, you'll be moving forward.

The only thing I'd add, though, is that I suggest you move out now, and don't make plans to move 'back home' until at least next year. Your emotions are running high and you shouldn't make major decisions that way. Plus, it will give it time to see if he DOES go through the changes required to become a better husband.


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## farsidejunky (Mar 19, 2014)

Elizabeth001 said:


> Maybe she was hungry? I don't understand why you are so negative. A personal button get pushed?
> 
> OP: get your a$$ out of this marriage. If you stay, you have no one to blame but yourself.
> 
> ...


My wife and I have been in this position before, Elizabeth.

One glaring example, during the peak of our dysfunction, was me spending 5 hours in early summer Tennessee heat setting posts and building fence for her horses. It was hot, miserable work.

When I came into the house, thoroughly exhausted after working on a project that was exclusively for her, there was not so much is a thank you, but rather a complaint that I was neglecting taking care of the trash and the dishes that day.

Once resentment gets a foothold, it leads us to view the best actions in a poor light.

This is not necessarily defending her husband, who certainly has his own share of issues. But it wouldn't hurt for her to consider that not all action (or lack of action) from him is nefarious.


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## Elizabeth001 (May 18, 2015)

Did you guys miss the part about her being sick?


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## Elizabeth001 (May 18, 2015)

FSJ, I can't see this man-boy doing anything like you did. He's fat, lazy, stinky and using his wife for a mommy. The only thing I see that's worse is her letting him. 


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## Elizabeth001 (May 18, 2015)

I suppose it hit a soft spot for me too. When I was down in my last marriage, the whole world stopped and waited for me to get it going again. I had Popeye arms from rowing the boat all by myself. 


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## Elizabeth001 (May 18, 2015)

farsidejunky said:


> My wife and I have been in this position before, Elizabeth.
> 
> One glaring example, during the peak of our dysfunction, was me spending 5 hours in early summer Tennessee heat setting posts and building fence for her horses. It was hot, miserable work.
> 
> ...




As a side note, I would have met you at the door totally nude with an ice cold beer...ushered you off to the shower and given you the best bj a man ever had, then tucked you in under the fan for a nice nap while I arranged dinner!

Uhhh...sorry...I got sidetracked with the visual 


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## Elizabeth001 (May 18, 2015)

Ah dammit...my cat is having kittens again 


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

Elizabeth001 said:


> As a side note, I would have met you at the door totally nude with an ice cold beer...ushered you off to the shower and given you the best bj a man ever had, then tucked you in under the fan for a nice nap while I arranged dinner!
> 
> Uhhh...sorry...I got sidetracked with the visual
> 
> ...


But that is what someone that loves and respects and admires and appreciates and desires their partner does. 

People who don't have that esteem for their partner find fault and resentment in what they do. 

That's not me or anyone else being negative and it's not about soft spots. It's simply recognizing the reality. 

The OP's husband can come home with a winning powerball ticket and she is going to complain that now he is going to be even lazier and that there will now be a bigger house to clean and that she will have to hire a maid and butler to take care of it. 

It's not about the deeds. It's about how she feels about him.


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## Elizabeth001 (May 18, 2015)

oldshirt said:


> But that is what someone that loves and respects and admires and appreciates and desires their partner does.
> 
> 
> 
> ...




True. When I was REALLY done with my marriage, there was NOTHING he could have done to turn it around. 

Time for these guys to cash in the chips. 


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## Elizabeth001 (May 18, 2015)

@oldshirt I was just sitting on my patio, having an adult beverage and a nice visual of FSJ pounding posts in the ground in the Tennessee summer heat. Why did ya have to ruin it with logic? UUUUGGGHHH




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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

Elizabeth001 said:


> @oldshirt I was just sitting on my patio, having an adult beverage and a nice visual of FSJ pounding posts in the ground in the Tennessee summer heat. Why did ya have to ruin it with logic? UUUUGGGHHH
> 
> 
> 
> ...


How about me in work boots and a tool belt with no shirt on, adding an extension to your deck and installing a hot tub for you???

Will that bring the good vibes back? 😉


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## Elizabeth001 (May 18, 2015)

oldshirt said:


> How about me in work boots and a tool belt with no shirt on, adding an extension to your deck and installing a hot tub for you???
> 
> 
> 
> Will that bring the good vibes back?




OMG. I'm a sucker (no pun intended) for a tool belt. 

Knock it off before I have to report you to the Gods for being a tease a$$hole. I gots no one but my 2 schnauzers to go to bed with & I don't want to give them emotional scars. They don't understand how to post here to get help 


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## Elizabeth001 (May 18, 2015)

You said "extension". Hehe




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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

Elizabeth001 said:


> You said "extension". Hehe
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Well if one is going to erect a deck, there will have to be some extension.

You can't bring the job to completion without it.


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## Elizabeth001 (May 18, 2015)

oldshirt said:


> Well if one is going to erect a deck, there will have to be some extension.
> 
> 
> 
> You can't bring the job to completion without it.




Well...we will have to agree to disagree then. Where there is a will, there is a way. It ain't always about your extension dear 

I'm going to bed now and dream about sweaty guys building fences and decks *sigh*

Have I told you TAM people that I love you lately? (Well...MOST of you...lol)






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## ABHale (Jan 3, 2016)

I believe it was the fact that he didn't give two cents that OP was sick.


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