# How does a military divorce work?



## JCash205 (May 29, 2016)

My wife has been in the military for as long as we've been married. I sacrificed a career to take care of the house, and we moved overseas together. She has been active duty for 6 years. She apparently now wants out. 

The divorce papers I found earlier hadn't been filed, but they have vanished from the house, she said she threw them away, but she is going to the base legal office, but lied saying she wasn't...

Her first shirt says they wont file the papers or draft them, just give her information.

What exactly are my options here?


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## C3156 (Jun 13, 2012)

First of all, the military JAG's usually do not get involved in domestic items like divorce. They might give a little advice, but you would be best served to see a civilian lawyer for advice.

Sorry that you gave up a career for your wife and now she wants out. You can only control yourself, so don't pay her a lot of attention.

A military divorce is like any other divorce. You don't mention kids, so hopefully you will not have that drama. I hate to tell you that she has not been in long enough for you to demand a portion of her pension, I believe the minimum is 10 years.


What I would do:
- Split the bank account in half and put your half in a separate account. Do this first so you have money to start with. Online banking works well, I use USAA.
- Split your marital assets and ship everything that is yours back to the states.
- Secure a place to live and move back to the states.
- Once you get there, establish residency, if necessary, and file for divorce.
- Make sure to request half of her retirement fund if she has established one.

Since she is overseas at the moment, the process may take a while. Once you reach whatever state requirement is that you reside in, you might be able to get a default divorce without her. Most likely she will have some legal protection till she returns to the states. 

So don't hold your breath on a quick divorce, may take a couple years. Which is why I recommend you split your stuff first and get it out of the house. That way she can't sell it once you leave.

You are stuck in an unenviable position right now. Take action to protect yourself and your possessions while you can. At least you got a heads up.


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## kristin2349 (Sep 12, 2013)

Understanding Divorce in the Military | Military.com


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## threelittlestars (Feb 18, 2016)

You do everything C315 SAYS! 

In that order too. Please got to US, and protect YOU at all costs. This woman is the enemy...


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## DepressedDiva (Mar 23, 2017)

it used to be you could get half the pension after 10 years of marriage but now its a percentage. Even then the service member has to have 20 years of service. 

I am sorry to hear that your wife wants to divorce you. You will not likely get any compensation from your spouse. No one cares about the sacrifices a military spouse makes - we don't get a medal or any damn thing.


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

DepressedDiva said:


> it used to be you could get half the pension after 10 years of marriage but now its a percentage. Even then the service member has to have 20 years of service.
> 
> I am sorry to hear that your wife wants to divorce you. You will not likely get any compensation from your spouse. No one cares about the sacrifices a military spouse makes - we don't get a medal or any damn thing.


A service member must have served "honorably" for a minimum of twenty years to receive a pension. That being said, being married to the service member was [at minimum] 10 years to get any of their pension. Now, it is a percentage, based on years married. There have been cases where one could get a pension with less time. A medical discharge at 19 years service or so. I remember reading about some pensions offered for ~15 years service. But those were rare and I might be mistaken.

If you divorce and she stays in for twenty years then go back and visit your rights. 

What assets do you have that could be impacted? House, boat, cars/trucks, motorcycles, pets, children, cash in bank, money in TSP, 401K's, land, buildings, etc.


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

DepressedDiva said:


> it used to be you could get half the pension after 10 years of marriage but now its a percentage. Even then the service member has to have 20 years of service.
> 
> I am sorry to hear that your wife wants to divorce you. You will not likely get any compensation from your spouse. *No one cares about the sacrifices a military spouse makes - we don't get a medal or any damn thing.*




Isn't that the truth. People just live their own lives and whine how hard they have it. They do not have a clue what sacrifices the spouses need to make, when their service spouse is deployed or on call 24/7, 365 days a year. Even on leave, they can reach out and call you back. The lower enlisted folks and families have it the worst. Some are on food stamps.


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