# Where did i go wrong



## FINISH LAST (Apr 13, 2011)

I been married to my wife for 23 years now but we were high school sweethearts and probably been together longer than that. Shortly after our anniversary she has done a 360. She leaves for work at 0900 and I don't see or hear from her at all anymore until the hours of midnight to 0400 in the morning every night now. 

I have been the sole provider for everything, mortgage,credit card bills, gas/electric, all medical bills,car note, insurances etc. Actually the money she make she is hers,she can contribute if necessary but usually not.
I buy her a new vehicle every 3 years, I clean, cook and for the past 20 years bring her breakfast every sunday in bed while I am up cooking for the family. 

I have 2 jobs and told myself if I was ever blessed with making great money I would ensure my family had the better things in life, well I spoiled them. The wife and I use to do things together and that has stopped. She has recently asked for a divorce and I am crushed. I thought I had given her eveything,quality time together, spirtiual time together,a home and all of the things you might want. It isn't hard to see that she is having an affair all the signs are in front of me. My question to the Ladies lounge Why is she still coming home and hopping in the bed after asking for this divorce although we sleep head to toe, Why is she angry at me but she is the one cheating, and why when some women have a good man they through it all away and the good guy finishes last? I feel like a fool to have poured all my heart into this woman and get jilted like this after all these years, was she always planning this?


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## Rob774 (Sep 27, 2010)

I'm curious what the ladies answer will be as well, although they can only speculate whats in the mind of your wife...

To me, it seems as though you were taken for granted. THe more you did... the more she got used to you giving. There was never a time when she had to take a step back and appreciate what you have, what you've provided for her. The Great Provider, the Mr. Nice Guy, to her = The Guy With No Edge, No Passion. Chances are, the guy she is cheating on you with, is 1/5 the man you are, but he's got that moxy, that mojo, that edge that you don't have, that extra bit of "umph" that excites your wife. She will have to learn the hard way, like everyone else who goes down this road... there's a special little ***** and her name is Karma. And also the grass is not always greener on the other side. She wants to cheat, she can call another household home. You are not going to sleep in the bed i provided why you bang other dudes.

Sorry ladies for intercepting this.


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## southbound (Oct 31, 2010)

Rob774 said:


> I'm curious what the ladies answer will be as well, although they can only speculate whats in the mind of your wife...
> 
> To me, it seems as though you were taken for granted. THe more you did... the more she got used to you giving. There was never a time when she had to take a step back and appreciate what you have, what you've provided for her. The Great Provider, the Mr. Nice Guy, to her = The Guy With No Edge, No Passion. Chances are, the guy she is cheating on you with, is 1/5 the man you are, but he's got that moxy, that mojo, that edge that you don't have, that extra bit of "umph" that excites your wife. She will have to learn the hard way, like everyone else who goes down this road... there's a special little ***** and her name is Karma. And also the grass is not always greener on the other side. She wants to cheat, she can call another household home. You are not going to sleep in the bed i provided why you bang other dudes.
> 
> Sorry ladies for intercepting this.



I agree that this is a possibility. I was in a similar boat. I thought I was providing a good life, but apparently she was taking it for granted. I now joke with some of my younger friends who aren't married that if they have any skills like cooking or cleaning, don't do it until you've been married a few years. Then it will seem like a treat. I jumped right in in the beginning, so my cooking and cleaning was no big deal to my wife, it was just the norm.


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## magnoliagal (Mar 30, 2011)

My theory is biblical. In the bible it says we love whom we serve. In your case you did all the serving and she did nothing hence she lost her love for you. 

I have an acquaintance whose marriage ended the exact same way yours did. She had an affair even though her husband gave her everything. But yep karma's a *****. That man dumped her when the affair became public and he went back to his wife. She then began screwing her friends husband (who lives next door I might add). She's drinking, partying (and she's way to old for that lifestyle). Her hair is falling out, she's aged 10 years and she is now a mess. I've since lost touch with her because that's not anything I want a part of.


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