# Did my husband sleep with you too?



## Rugs (Apr 12, 2013)

I had this feeling a couple of times before as I was married to a serial cheater for several years......

There is a neighbor down the street who I've seen at a few old neighborhood functions and I've tried to be friendly with her and she has completely ignored me. We've never spoke and she is very friendly with everyone else but me. It's almost as she has singled me out. 

It crossed my mind if maybe my husband slept with her. ??

I had this feeling about one of the moms from my son's baseball team once too. 

I of course have no idea but do you ever look around and wonder if people around you may have slept with your spouse? 

I wonder if he ever slept with anyone I knew........

Poor us BS's :slap:


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

With my son's father? Yes I've wondered about some of the women that were around at the time. Their behavior was off. 

There was one in particular who it turned out that he was sleeping with.


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## johny1989 (May 21, 2014)

Over thinking nothing else...


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## Cloaked (Sep 15, 2013)

Initial perception is usually correct.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## harrybrown (May 22, 2013)

It would be a nice gesture to tell you, if they did.


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## NextTimeAround (Dec 15, 2011)

I still value sisterhood, but these days I am very carefeul with my female friends.

Over the years I have noticed

1) when female friends had direct access to my brother to date, I was toast.

2) when female friends had direct access to my (ex)H, I was...well, almost toast.

One woman said, she did not want to make plans with me unless my husband was coming. She was single. that was when I was nice and wondered if I had done something wrong. Those thoughts do not flood me anymore.

Rugs, since everyone likes to thme of themselves as a good person, then when do something so heinous as sleep with a mrried man, then they have to behave in ways that don't remind them of how horrible they are. Blanking you out, so that you do not exist is the method here.

At this point in my life, I might get in their face.... in a nice way of course and make them acknowledge me. But I agree, every situation is different.


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## thatbpguy (Dec 24, 2012)

Maybe she did and maybe she didn't, but this type of thinking can be very self destructive. Give her the benefit of the doubt unless you have better reasons to think otherwise.


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## NextTimeAround (Dec 15, 2011)

thatbpguy said:


> Maybe she did and maybe she didn't, but this type of thinking can be very self destructive. Give her the benefit of the doubt unless you have better reasons to think otherwise.



What would giving the benefit of the doubt do for the OP. the neighbor has already blanked her so there's no relationship here anyway?


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## RWB (Feb 6, 2010)

johny1989 said:


> Over thinking nothing else...


Were you married to a Serial Cheater?


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## Joka (May 15, 2014)

Rugs said:


> I had this feeling a couple of times before as I was married to a serial cheater for several years......
> 
> There is a neighbor down the street who I've seen at a few old neighborhood functions and I've tried to be friendly with her and she has completely ignored me. We've never spoke and she is very friendly with everyone else but me. It's almost as she has singled me out.
> 
> ...


From my experiences first instincts are usually right or lead to something close


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## Rugs (Apr 12, 2013)

I don't care if she did sleep with my husband. I have moved on from my marriage and much happier for it. 

It's almost comical that we all could be in a similar situation and not know it. 

My ex-husband is EX. I don't have feelings of anxiety over it. If someone told me they slept with my husband while we were married, I don't think I would care at this point. 

I think it would be mean if they told me intimate details but I have no connection in my heart for him.

I don't wish my ex-husband harm, I just don't care. 

I do have triggers and I also wonder what might have happened while I was living my life not having any idea what was going on. 

Just a topic for discussion.


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## Acoa (Sep 21, 2012)

I'm wondering who my STBXW has selpt with. I figure it's more than she has admitted too. I'm not going to lose sleep over it, but it does make you wonder. 

The way I plan to deal with it is to treat people as well (or not) as they treat me. So, if someone is giving me the cold shoulder I'm not going to waste any time guessing why. I'll just expend my social energy where it's accepted.


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