# I want to tie my wife up and use toys on her



## tjohnson (Mar 10, 2010)

In the past she asks/demands that i stop using toys on her (especially the magic wand) after a few minutes. I trully think judging by the past instances she is afraid of me seeing her reaction. For some reason i think she is going to be set off into convulsive orgasms like i have never seen before. I have heard of women who have used the magic wand comment that they screammed like never before. 

My intention is to tie her up completely and give her a sensual massage, start slow. In the end i am going to use the toy she uses internally (and seems to like) for a little bit then bring out the wand and really stimulate her clit/clit area and let the sparks fly. I will prep her allong the way that my intentions are to bring her to new places and want to assure her that it i fully expect her to be driven crazy. I want her to feel comforable that it is not this (device) that is making her feel that way but, me (even if the device may be "helping". 

I am looking for suggestions on:

1) Creating an erotic mood.
2) Stimulating all of her sences.
3) I am thinking of drawing her a bath first (do women fell more sexy after a bath?
4) suggestions on the logistics of the restraints/positioning. I have a couple of handcuffs but, think those may hurt. I have posts under our bed i can tie too (I am pretty good rope and can tie some knots) not sure if restraints that you buy would be better. I certainly want her to be comfortable. 
5) If my suspicions are true (that she doesn't want me to see her react this way) how can i get her to "just go with it". PS i have already tried to "ask her".


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## Mom6547 (Jul 13, 2010)

Candles.
Different people have different opinions on this one, but I like my DH's sexy tunes mix.
I hate baths. Ick. I do not want to sit in a pool of my own dirt and sweat.
You can't *get* her to do anything. If she feels unsafe or insecure, then she won't want to do it. Have you asked her why she does not want you to see her reaction? When she uses the magic wand (love that thing!) does she squirt? Could she be afraid of that? 

Make SURE if you tie her up that you have a safe word. Something that has nothing to do with sex like door mat that you would never normally say during sex. If she says the safe word, it is full stop. Trust is the most important thing.


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## Idontknownow (Sep 30, 2010)

Honestly if I were her I wouldn't trust you to tie me up since you made it sound like the whole point was she couldn't stop you when she wanted.


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## michzz (Jun 6, 2008)

You might reconsider your theory about tying her up and then buzzing the bejesus out of her.

Has it occurred to you that doing so may be excruciatingly painful? Especially if she has just climaxed.

You may see her as being inhibited and that tying her up and buzzing her with the toy will break her through to to the other side, of sheer pleasure.

But I'll bet she'll see it as an assault.


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## tjohnson (Mar 10, 2010)

To clarify it took her months to admit to using the vibrator on herself but, she jokes that it is her best friend. We have a fairly active sexlife so i am not challanged by a toy. 

Someone asked if the squirts with the wand. I am not sure it, i guess that it a good question. 

OK. What is a spreader bar?


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## nice777guy (Nov 23, 2009)

michzz said:


> You might reconsider your theory about tying her up and then buzzing the bejesus out of her.


:rofl:


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## Mom6547 (Jul 13, 2010)

tjohnson said:


> To clarify it took her months to admit to using the vibrator on herself but, she jokes that it is her best friend. We have a fairly active sexlife so i am not challanged by a toy.


I don't think anyone is questioning whether YOU are challenged by a toy. But a number of people have, rightly, expressed concern that your desire to tie her up is based on a desire to force her to do something she does not want to do. 



> Someone asked if the squirts with the wand. I am not sure it, i guess that it a good question.
> 
> OK. What is a spreader bar?


Spreader bar - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia


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## kgregory1011 (Dec 2, 2010)

Sounds like she's afraid of "letting go". Sex can make people feel vulnerable, especially if she is out of her comfort zone.Maybe start by blindfolding her, let her get comfortable with that. Why dont you reverse roles? Let her tie you up, let her experience the intensity of being in complete control. Start small, there are so many different things you can try. 

My husband was used to the same old boring sex until he met me ..lol 

I have opened that mans eyes and made him see that sex is pleasure, pleasure is a good thing. He was hesitant with some things, all I asked was he try it. Now he is open to almost anything and he loves what I have shown him. 

I am happy to say that my "bedroom box" is a closet full of fun


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## MarriedWifeInLove (May 28, 2010)

michzz said:


> You might reconsider your theory about tying her up and then buzzing the bejesus out of her.
> QUOTE]
> 
> This was hillarious and made my day! :lol:


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## michzz (Jun 6, 2008)

Guess you ought to get the rope.


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## MsLonely (Sep 23, 2010)

tjohnson said:


> In the past she asks/demands that i stop using toys on her (especially the magic wand) after a few minutes. I trully think judging by the past instances she is afraid of me seeing her reaction. For some reason i think she is going to be set off into convulsive orgasms like i have never seen before. I have heard of women who have used the magic wand comment that they screammed like never before.
> 
> My intention is to tie her up completely and give her a sensual massage, start slow. In the end i am going to use the toy she uses internally (and seems to like) for a little bit then bring out the wand and really stimulate her clit/clit area and let the sparks fly. I will prep her allong the way that my intentions are to bring her to new places and want to assure her that it i fully expect her to be driven crazy. I want her to feel comforable that it is not this (device) that is making her feel that way but, me (even if the device may be "helping".
> 
> ...


The plan is ok but your suspicions could be totally wrong.
Bring her to haven by yourself, not by the magic wand instead.
If she told you to stop, it means she hated it or hated you using that stuff that made her feel sick. That's your desire telling you to try that not hers!


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## MsLonely (Sep 23, 2010)

No woman is afraid of letting go and show her reaction. Unless she's a virgin or someone who seldom sees a penis in her life.


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## nice777guy (Nov 23, 2009)

MsLonely said:


> No woman is afraid of letting go and show her reaction. Unless she's a virgin or someone who seldom sees a penis in her life.


I think my wife has held back a few times. Hard to tell, but I had that same feeling that OP had - that she was about to explode, but was afraid to really let it go.

Of course I didn't go back later and push the issue, so I guess I'll never really know.


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## Mom6547 (Jul 13, 2010)

MsLonely said:


> No woman is afraid of letting go and show her reaction. Unless she's a virgin or someone who seldom sees a penis in her life.


Where do you get this? What a load. People are insecure or tentative about a whole myriad of things. This included.


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## Trenton (Aug 25, 2010)

Seriously, I've seen a penis a lot and it's hard for me to let go. 

Michzz that might be the funniest forum line I've read and I thought the Dyson and the a$$chaps were pretty hard to beat...


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## MsLonely (Sep 23, 2010)

Go ahead and try it. Many people here would love to know the result.

I have experienced lots of sex, including anal, toys, WWM, most of the positions and role plays.

If I tell a man to stop, that means STOP. Women who have experienced a lot knowing very well what they want and don't want.

Toys are something very addtional in my opinion. They are good for musterbations or when the penis doesn't hold the hardness for that long otherwise, the real hard meat is more prefered.


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## MsLonely (Sep 23, 2010)

vthomeschoolmom said:


> Where do you get this? What a load. People are insecure or tentative about a whole myriad of things. This included.


Are you saying his wife has never experienced orgasms with him?


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## MsLonely (Sep 23, 2010)

Trenton said:


> Seriously, I've seen a penis a lot and it's hard for me to let go.
> 
> Michzz that might be the funniest forum line I've read and I thought the Dyson and the a$$chaps were pretty hard to beat...


You never experience an orgasm? Or feel shy to show your man that you're having an orgasm?


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## Mrs.LonelyGal (Nov 8, 2010)

MsLonely said:


> No woman is afraid of letting go and show her reaction. Unless she's a virgin or someone who seldom sees a penis in her life.


You can't say "no woman". 
I have come through a lot w/ my sexuality, but for years I wouldn't allow myself to orgasm. I wouldn't let anyone go down on me because I was insecure about relinquishing "control". Orgasms can make you feel very vulnerable- some women don't like to let go.
I know, because I was one of them for years.


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## 76Trombones (Jun 2, 2010)

It's quite simple. If she demands/asks you to stop using toys, you should stop it right away. Have some respect for her, dude!


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## MsLonely (Sep 23, 2010)

Mrs.LonelyGal said:


> You can't say "no woman".
> I have come through a lot w/ my sexuality, but for years I wouldn't allow myself to orgasm. I wouldn't let anyone go down on me because I was insecure about relinquishing "control". Orgasms can make you feel very vulnerable- some women don't like to let go.
> I know, because I was one of them for years.


I did say, No women... unless she's a virgin kind, that means lacking of sexual experiences, including never has an orgasm.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## MsLonely (Sep 23, 2010)

now ppl are assuming your wife never has an orgasm so you must try with that magic wand to bring her one.


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## MsLonely (Sep 23, 2010)

I think we should wait him try and see the result.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Mom6547 (Jul 13, 2010)

Trenton said:


> Seriously, I've seen a penis a lot and it's hard for me to let go.
> 
> Michzz that might be the funniest forum line I've read and I thought the Dyson and the a$$chaps were pretty hard to beat...


Much to the disgust of some of the male posters here, I have had a LOT of sex with several different people. I have seen my O face on video. Yah I don't want to share that with everyone.


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## Mom6547 (Jul 13, 2010)

MsLonely said:


> I did say, No women... unless she's a virgin kind, that means lacking of sexual experiences, including never has an orgasm.
> '
> 
> You are just plain mistaken. I am neither virgin kind nor lacking in sexual experience. There are plenty of circumstances in which I will not relinquish control enough to squirt.


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## swedish (Mar 6, 2008)

michzz said:


> You might reconsider your theory about tying her up and then buzzing the bejesus out of her.
> 
> Has it occurred to you that doing so may be excruciatingly painful? Especially if she has just climaxed.
> 
> ...


:iagree: :rofl:

Any tying up should be agreed upon beforehand...and if she agrees I would highly recommend getting something soft, that she can pull off if she wants to....not metal handcuffs or ropes.

Just fyi, the most intense toys, unless you have a hard time getting to the point of orgasm, are the worst choice if you are going for long, extended pleasure. Better to use feathers, caress, massage and a toy she likes...go slow and get her wanting it.

When I read your post, I thought if that were me I would probably feel...then I read Michzz's post and thought....yeah, that!


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## tjohnson (Mar 10, 2010)

Appreciate all your imput but, shoud clarify: 
She is very orgasmic.
I had to PUSH her to use a toy and now has a couple and loves using them. 
Granted I need to be cautions not to "assault her" and make her feel comfortable. 
Follow my logic- 
All orgasms are not the same and some are more intense then others. Women who can only orgasms using power tools...right. 
So it is fair to say that a powerfulr evice MAY evoke moe intense orgasms. Knowing my wife she may feel uncomfortable "letting go" whether that is squirting or screaming. 
PS I one thing i plan to do is communicate with her along so we can get feedback. 

Based upon your feedback and rethinking i will try the tying up thing and not push anything but, see how it goes. Perhaps i will let her tie me up first.


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## swedish (Mar 6, 2008)

tjohnson said:


> She is very orgasmic.


In that case, a powerful toy might be too much for her...when it is overly sensitive it's uncomfortable and painful not pleasurable...better to not make direct contact with overly sensitive areas for a prolonged time.

The best way to achieve multiples over time (IMO) is to build up slowly, change it up as you go.


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## southbound (Oct 31, 2010)

I would just make sure there was a long discussion about expectations before doing it. I'm sure men and women are different, but I get really sensitive if hand-job stimulation continues after orgasm. Early in our marriage, my wife noticed this and asked if she could keep going while I was tied up, even if I said stop. I agreed. She continued for several minutes after orgasm. I wouldn't call it painful, just extremely intense. If I had been untied, I certainly would have ended it, but we discussed beforehand, so I was ok with it. Immediately afterwards I thought, "I'll never do that again," but oddly enough, I got in the mood for it a few more times. Communication is the main thing.


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## MsLonely (Sep 23, 2010)

tjohnson said:


> Based upon your feedback and rethinking i will try the tying up thing and not push anything but, see how it goes. Perhaps i will let her tie me up first.


I like the "Tie you up" idea! If I were your wife, I would use the magic wand on you that allow you to experience an anal orgasm.:rofl:

I did use a vib on my husband...LOL he didn't like it so I only tried once.


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## marriedwithkids1 (Nov 10, 2010)

My initial thought is that this device may hurt, be too much or perhaps she climaxes so quickly that whe wants the stimulation (or the extreme stimulation this device provides) to stop. Perhaps that is why she is abruptly stopping you. 

In fairness i will assume perhaps that your concerns that she is hiding the fact that if you continue to use the wand on her that she will scream and convulse in orgamic bliss that she is dousn';t want you to see. I would make sure that you let her communicate with you what she is feeling with everything you do to her. Try using lube and rubbing her in a variety of different ways. Up down, side to side. My husband recently did this to me and sparks practically flew. Critical that you ASK "is this good" is this better, etc. she may tell you when something is good but, may not tell you when it is not. You should try to learn her various stages of Orgasms. It may be a fun excersize for you to understand where she is at IE is she close to cumming, just about to come, did she already and needs to "back off" or is she ramping up for another...You can experiment. 



I think doing this first (without bringing out the wand) will help you to understand her response and perhaps even be more in tune with how she/her body responds. This will not only help with your "Experiment" but, may improve your overall ability to please her and may also bring you to a new level of intimacy. Knowing how much stimulation she likes and when will be valuable for you to please her with and without toys. Only after doing this on a few occasions would I suggest moveing forward with "the big buzz" . When you are using toys continue to let her know how much you enjoy watching her and that you how much you enjoy giving her pleasure. Good luck with your journey and esperiment. 


PS I heard Dr Frankenstien is looking for another assistant! You may want to apply.


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## hamster (Dec 19, 2010)

my suggestion is to gag her really well:smthumbup::smthumbup:


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## Mrs.LonelyGal (Nov 8, 2010)

yeah that was a great first post hamster... troll alert!


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## SteppingStones (Dec 20, 2010)

I love it when my husband ties me up, blindfolds me, whips me, or just uses "force" (in a playful way of course). We have an understanding though - if I say stop - he stops. Instantly. I enjoy a little pain with my pleasure, but he's careful not to go to far. In fact I'm typically asking him to be more rough. 

There is a good product out there. Bed straps. They hide nicely under the mattress and have velcro straps. I enjoy my hands tied, my feet not so much, but I let him do it every once in a while.

Handcuffs do hurt if you put them on too tight, I like mine a little snug - but beware they DO leave marks if she moves too much in them. 

A good idea is to have a code word that REALLY means stop. Sometimes I'll say no, but only because it's so intense, not because it's unpleasurable. So for us, even thought stop generally means stop, if he asks if it's too much and I say "its yellow" it means it's getting to be too much but its not there yet. If I say "it's red" that means back off, slow down, stop, etc. 

If it's green that means I can tolerate a higher level of intensity.


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## Mrs.G (Nov 20, 2010)

I will never understand how men enjoy sexual acts, with a woman they had to pressure! They often forget that the woman's boundaries are important as well.
The OP comes across as a pig. Stop pushing your wife!! She's not your sex slave.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## tjohnson (Mar 10, 2010)

Mrs.G said:


> I will never understand how men enjoy sexual acts, with a woman they had to pressure! They often forget that the woman's boundaries are important as well.
> The OP comes across as a pig. Stop pushing your wife!! She's not your sex slave.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I appreciate all your feedback. 

To clarify my wife has domonstrated being "shy" about trying things in the past which after some gentle nudging she enjoyed them. I think i could be accused of being a pig if my intentions were to somehow derive pleasure from something that trully was against her wishes. I don't think this can be considered treating her like a sex slave but, perhaps we have different outlooks on things. If for example my wife wanted too tie me up so she could stimulate me analy-because she thought i might like it but, i was being shy or homophic and did so in a respectful manner and didn't hurt me would that be wrong? 

I think it is human nature to tell white lies in the interest of protecting another's feelings. I know my wife, i am operating under the premise/suspician that these toys used in a certain way may/can/has take her to places my di#$, tonge or hand cannot take her. That she may know (perhaps from past experience) that from what she has said that she is afraid to let go. Perhaps she will squirt, scream in orgasmig bliss or tell me to stop. Either way i think it will be fun. 

Thanks again for your comments.


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