# ** TAM "coping" demographics - Who we are***



## Pit-of-my-stomach (Nov 2, 2010)

I deleted the old thread to replace it with this more detailed POLL...

Again, I would like to uderstand "who we are" as a group...

What the "coping" board is made up of...

For those that no longer apply, please fill in your "status" as it was when you found "Talk about marriage/Coping with Infidelity" (ie; You were the LS or DS, and now your divorced)

If your the DS and the LS both... check both options...

Multiple Choice Poll is above


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

There is no poll... LOL


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## Numb-badger (May 18, 2011)

The poll rolled away


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## Pit-of-my-stomach (Nov 2, 2010)

Numb-badger said:


> The poll rolled away


Strange the way posting polls works, you have to make the post, hit "post" then the poll options come up... and you have to fill in everything... Anyway, should pop up now.


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## Numb-badger (May 18, 2011)

Tada!
Magic.


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## HurtinginTN (Feb 22, 2011)

30 - 40 or 40 - 50. I chose the former. May change the lower limit to a 1 in the ones position to clarify those of us on the decade.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

I am also "on the decade" TN, so I didn't vote. I am 30. 
Also there wasn't an option for "divorced" and also I can't vote BS and DS casue I only clicked "Female" and it saved my choice and I can't go back now. LOL.


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## it-guy (Jan 6, 2011)

you are all kinds of messed up JB


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## Pit-of-my-stomach (Nov 2, 2010)

HurtinginTN said:


> 30 - 40 or 40 - 50. I chose the former. May change the lower limit to a 1 in the ones position to clarify those of us on the decade.


lol. Whoops. My bad. Maybe if your under 40 years and 5 months you round down, 40 years and 8 months you round up?

Re; the divorced thing... I tried to alter is so that it said "when I found TAM I was.... " for the people that these options no longer apply to...

*edit* hard to see wher I posted this at the top of the poll but it says POLL question is ... "This is my story, or was when I found this forum... "

wish I would have had more options or could post multiple polls to the same thread. But limit was 1 poll and 10 options in that poll..


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## AppleDucklings (Mar 27, 2011)

I was the LS when I first found this site. I am now divorced. I am 34


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

it-guy said:


> you are all kinds of messed up JB


:rofl:

There aren't enough options for my demographic. LOL


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## HurtinginTN (Feb 22, 2011)

Pit-of-my-stomach said:


> lol. Whoops. My bad. Maybe if your under 40 years and 5 months you round down, 40 years and 8 months you round up?


No, thanks! I'll round down 40 years and 364 days and lower. That next day, I'll round up. lol


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## Saffron (Mar 7, 2010)

Lol! Yup, I turned 40 last year. My H's affair started when I was 39 and was full blown by the time I turned. Just an extra kick in the pants that year.


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

I'm Batman.


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## Numb-badger (May 18, 2011)

Runs like Dog said:


> I'm Batman.


Isn't Bruce Wayne a playboy? 
If so, wtf are you doing on a marriage site!?! I thought you'd run a mile from this place


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## cherokee96red (Apr 23, 2011)

I've started to have doubts about the reality of there actually being an OW at all. Why? Because more than once I told H that we could get through any challenge to our lives and marriage except for him cheating on me. Infidelity would be grounds for divorce in my book. Considering all that we have faced and dealt with in 25 years together he knew that would be the one thing that would be next to impossible for me. Even the chance that I wouldn't make through brain surgery and recover as well as I have wouldn't have done it for me. 

So now I am beginning to doubt the validity of his claim. Think he is simply being cowardly in the way he is handling the issues at hand like financial health, my health, you name it.


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## Pit-of-my-stomach (Nov 2, 2010)

Numb-badger said:


> Isn't Bruce Wayne a playboy?


Not exactly.... lol.


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## Numb-badger (May 18, 2011)

Lol!


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## RestlessInGeorgia (Dec 3, 2008)

Pit-of-my-stomach said:


> Not exactly.... lol.


So he's not a playboy, he "Plays with Boys". Gotcha :rofl:


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## Pit-of-my-stomach (Nov 2, 2010)

BTW, If your "the cheater" and "the cheated" just check both options...


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

Bruce Wayne is. Batman's kind of a neutered freak.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Pit-of-my-stomach said:


> BTW, If your "the cheater" and "the cheated" just check both options...


I voted only "female" cause I didn't think it was multiple-choice (lol) and also my age was on the cusp so there were 3 additional things I needed to check off but had already hit submit so I couldn't go back. (It only allows you to submit it 1x). Also, there wasn't an option for "divorced."

Wait, am I the only divorced person on here? It seems like it sometimes...?


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## AppleDucklings (Mar 27, 2011)

Jellybeans said:


> I voted only "female" cause I didn't think it was multiple-choice (lol) and also my age was on the cusp so there were 3 additional things I needed to check off but had already hit submit so I couldn't go back. (It only allows you to submit it 1x). Also, there wasn't an option for "divorced."
> 
> Wait, am I the only divorced person on here? It seems like it sometimes...?


I'm divorced


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Oh, yeah! LOL. 

Ok so I am not alone here  Oaks also got divorced last week.


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## Pit-of-my-stomach (Nov 2, 2010)

Jellybeans said:


> I voted only "female" cause I didn't think it was multiple-choice (lol) and also my age was on the cusp so there were 3 additional things I needed to check off but had already hit submit so I couldn't go back. (It only allows you to submit it 1x). Also, there wasn't an option for "divorced."
> 
> Wait, am I the only divorced person on here? It seems like it sometimes...?


FAIL. lol.


BTW, LURKERS.... You guys get the benefit of this forums wisdom and some really dark entertainment value...

Help us out here, even if you don't participate in the community.... 

Please stand up and be counted. There should be hundreds of people that fill this poll out...


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## pidge70 (Jan 17, 2011)

I had already hit submit too. I have cheated and been cheated on in my current relationship.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore (Apr 7, 2011)

Jellybeans and Appleducklings ~ 

We are the divorced people stuck in a married mind frame. LOL!!!


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

Being older is great. I am as calm as a Hindu Holstein when dealing with other people.


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## Anonymous_Female (Apr 16, 2011)

Jellybeans said:


> Wait, am I the only divorced person on here? It seems like it sometimes...?


I'm workin' on it!


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## Pit-of-my-stomach (Nov 2, 2010)

RWB said:


> POS,
> Damn, I feel like the old fart being lumped into the "I'm age 50+" whatever group.
> 
> There's got to be some wild cheating going on in that 60+ group with all the spare time they got to fool around.


POS sounds like the acronym for Piece of Sh*t... lol. just call me Pit.

I think the wild cheating at the 60+ prolly has more to do with the advent of Viagra and the other miracle "wood working" tools and less to do with spare time... lol. 

But, yeah your probably right, the silver's are knockin' boots like teenagers these days... I know of this dude that works for the hospital at a HUGE upscale retirement community in Florida and he said the biggest and most common treatment issue is STD's!!!. 



Anonymous_Female said:


> I'm workin' on it!


Me too. W moved out last week.


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## bobbie (Jun 1, 2011)

I've been on each corner of the eternal triangle, and no position is comfortable. Now I am single and am going to stay that way. My passion now is writing, and one of my books explores the whole minefield of infidelity - between men and women, between friends, between colleagues. ‘Truth Games’ Truth Games: Amazon.co.uk: Bobbie Darbyshire: Books We're in1970s London UK, when the freedoms of the swinging 60s began to run into trouble. It’s the two blazing hot summers of 75 and 76, and a group of friends are getting way out of their depth in infidelity. Thought-provoking stuff.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore said:


> Jellybeans and Appleducklings ~
> 
> We are the divorced people stuck in a married mind frame. LOL!!!


It's silly isn't it? LOL



Pit-of-my-stomach said:


> POS sounds like the acronym for Piece of Sh*t... lol. just call me Pit.


:rofl:

Unfortunately the poll isn't accurate since quite a few of us botched it on our first go-round.


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## grizabella (May 8, 2011)

Take it easy on us 60+ people. The fact that we're still going at it must give you young-uns some hope. It ain't over till it's over.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

grizabella said:


> Take it easy on us 60+ people. The fact that we're still going at it must give you young-uns some hope. It ain't over till it's over.


:smthumbup:

I like this. I am 30 and feeling old lately, (has something to do with the hub cheating w/ someone 10 yrs younger) but you have given me great hope.


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## grizabella (May 8, 2011)

JB, you got a whole lot of lovin to do. At 30 you are in your sexual prime (men max out somewhat earlier) and if properly cared for can last a long, long time. I'm a make-up artist and let me tell you, fixing up the outside can make you feel a lot better on the inside. Do something funky, outrageous and YOUNG. It still works for me. On the inside I feel like your age.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

grizabella said:


> JB, you got a whole lot of lovin to do. At 30 you are in your sexual prime


Oh believe me, I am VERY aware of this. LOL. Plus it's the first time in nearly a decade I've found myself without a sex partner since my ex and I divorced 2 months so yeah, it's different. Haha.



grizabella said:


> I'm a make-up artist and let me tell you, fixing up the outside can make you feel a lot better on the inside. Do something funky, outrageous and YOUNG. It still works for me. On the inside I feel like your age.


Great advice. I agree. My grammy is 80+ and goes walking nearly every day and takes gambling trips with her girlfriends. She looks about 15 yrs younger too. :raying I have these genes:: LOL. 

You & RWB are making me feel good about getting to my silver years. With the "feeling young" attitude and the propensity for all that loving in the adult communities, it sounds like great days are ahead! (Minus the herpes in the nursing homes, of course). Haha!


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