# I'm now a cuckold husband.



## TXDude

My wife has been having online affairs for about 6 months now. She knows I know and she just smiles at me when I confront her and she will not stop. Surprisingly, we are having the best sex we have had in decades. I would say better sex than when we 1st met 19 years ago. At 1st I was mad, jealous, hurt, humiliated, broken hearted ect. Now I am calm about her online and probably physical relationships with other men. She flirts on the phone before bed in our bathroom for about an hour, then comes to bed and I give her multiple O's before I finish. Before the affairs are sex was pretty bad, now it is great, I do all I can to last as long as possible and pleasure her. 

I'm now a cuckold husband and I'm not sure that I like the role. I like the improvement in our sex together but I don't like her sharing herself with other men. I'm not as freaked out about it as I was when I found out it several months ago, but I can tell it is hurting my self-esteem it is hurting me mentally. 

I found an interesting article about cuckold marriages that is worth a read. 

https://cuckoldcouple.wordpress.com/the-science-of-cuckoldry/


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## GusPolinski

So stop settling for virtual sloppy seconds and divorce.

Otherwise it won't be long before you're getting _actual_ sloppy seconds.

Hell, like you said, you might be already.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## zookeeper

Any chance this is YOUR blog?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## jorgegene

is this what you really want to be?

it almost sounds titillating to you.

i guess to each his own.

well, let me tell you bro, my ex. was the same. had her online b.f. and taunted me about it.
I even saw a text she sent him making fun of me. 
took me 2 more online affairs to get the guts to leave her sorry @ss forever.

my theory is if a woman (or man) is that brash, that egoistic, self centered, and immature to actually flaunt it without any God given shame, then they are beyond hope.

there is just no fixing that.


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## TXDude

zookeeper said:


> Any chance this is YOUR blog?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Not my blog. I realized today I'm now a cuckold husband since I'm still together with my cheating wife. That led me to google the topic and I found this article or blog on the topic. It seems that this type of "marriage" is very common. I didn't make the decision for this to happen in my marriage. I was devastated on Dday 1 then Dday2 3 4 5 6, one crisis after another. Now it seems I have surrendered to her infidelity and we have a good relationship as long as we don't discuss her cheating. Great sex nearly every night, compassion and friendship together during the day. However she will go away on her phone for an hour or so pretty much daily and have her online fun with other men. Then we are the happy couple having fantastic sex pleasuring each other, not just one sided sex.


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## GusPolinski

TXDude said:


> Not my blog. I realized today I'm now a cuckold husband since I'm still together with my cheating wife. That led me to google the topic and I found this article or blog on the topic. It seems that this type of "marriage" is very common. I didn't make the decision for this to happen in my marriage. I was devastated on Dday 1 then Dday2 3 4 5 6, one crisis after another. Now it seems I have surrendered to her infidelity and we have a good relationship as long as we don't discuss her cheating. Great sex nearly every night, compassion and friendship together during the day. However she will go away on her phone for an hour or so pretty much daily and have her online fun with other men. Then we are the happy couple having fantastic sex pleasuring each other, not just one sided sex.


I wouldn't say it's common, much less _very_ common.

Either way, she's not having sex w/ you... she's just using your c*ck to have sex w/ other men.

In her head, anyway.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Emerging Buddhist

Ugh... no sex is worth such a thing.

In technology terms... garbage in, garbage out.

In mindful terms... always, always trust your first gut instincts. If you feel something’s wrong, it usually is.

Sigh... I guess I am judgmental about some things, not sure I am willing to find a better path in this area though.

I guess if it works for you, I would not find myself in a better place though.


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## Clay2013

If you want to be second then continue on but if you want it to stop you file for divorce and put it all on the line. She will either stop or she wont. You can't control her but you can stand up for yourself. I would go see a lawyer right away and start doing 180. She would not be sleeping in my bed tonight and she would know it. 

C


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## maritalloneliness

So this article basically reduces the husband /wife relationship to that of animal urges where human beings are just looking for the best chances of obtaining the best genetic material to produce the best offspring. What a bunch of crock. So once the female has found the best man to provide for her financially, she leaves him at home while she bed hops with hopes of engaging with multiple men will produce the best child. Makes no sense because if we were like the animals, once this female comes back impregnated with another man seed, the home husband /animal would kill the offspring since it wouldn't be his causing the female to go into heat forcing her to copulate with him with the chance of passing on his genetic material. 
Surely through evolution and using our massive brains, we are above basic animal urges. Really, it seems people will find any excuse to justify their behavior.


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## GusPolinski

Clay2013 said:


> *If you want to be second then continue on* but if you want it to stop you file for divorce and put it all on the line. She will either stop or she wont. You can't control her but you can stand up for yourself. I would go see a lawyer right away and start doing 180. She would not be sleeping in my bed tonight and she would know it.
> 
> C


I dunno, man... sounds like he's _seventh_ at best.

And she's not going to stop. She's gotten too accustomed to it. Her brain has been re-wired for this, especially since she's gotten at least tacit approval from her husband up until this point. She _needs_ it now.

Can't remember his name, but we had a BH in a very similar situation a while back. I want to say he was a SAHD (ugh). Kept deleting his threads.

_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## TBT

TXDude said:


> Now I am calm about her online and *probably physical relationships with other men.
> *


It appears you have some doubts and I can see them only getting worse,but to each his own. Considering what you wrote above,it's probably wise to get regular STD checks. It wouldn't be wise to trust her word the way things stand now. Good luck.


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## TXDude

Yes, I know it is wrong, I can feel that it is wrong, it hurts my self-esteem, it hurts my pride, it just hurts my soul really bad. She has no respect for me, Gus is probably right that she is just using my [email protected] and is thinking of the other men when we have sex. 

Maybe I'm just hoping this will pass, that she will stop eventually on her own. 

My gut and my brain do not want to be a cuckold husband, but I can't find the strength to divorce yet. If I bury my head in the sand and pretend she is not cheating I feel better. It is like I'm hiding from the reality of her betrayal. It's like I'm surrendering because I can't take the pain of the betrayal any longer so I pretend it is not happening.


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## Bibi1031

Well, for being married for those many years and now to accept that you now share that woman which was yours only, must be a rude awakening.

If she broke the vow of "forsake all others", why are you still married to her? Divorce and just enjoy the great sex until she decides to change you for a different model. You can't possibly love her and accept this demotion? You must be in shock and the hysterical bonding won't last long. It's a bandaid to mask the pain.


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## MrsAldi

Why put up with being betrayed? 
If you want happiness leave, life is short why waste it on someone who doesn't care?

Sent from my B1-730HD using Tapatalk


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## Capster

TXDude said:


> My gut and my brain do not want to be a cuckold husband, but I can't find the strength to divorce yet.


That, my friend, is why you are a cuckold husband.


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## CH

Troll to get everyone all worked up?

But whatever floats your boat.


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## GuyInColorado

Sounds like a troll post. What real man would allow this to happen? You have no balls. Divorce and get some new pu$$y.


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## alte Dame

Real post or not, I think the focus on terminology for the BH is not fair. If we change the view to focus on the WW, the formal term for her is 'wh0re.' Google that, OP, and then ask if the sex is worth it.


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## TXDude

Not a troll. This is what is happening in my life right now. Yeah it is easy to say get some balls and blow up the marriage, but that is harder to do when you think how it is going to affect your children and immediate family. I already talked to some family and they all want me to ride it out, that she is probably going through a mental illness right now. That you can't blame a person for their illness. 

It seems things have slowed down a bit with her online activity, maybe we could be reaching a turning point. 

Another thing that is going through my head is that I'm just holding on because she is disrespecting me and I want to win her back 100% out of pride. Then once that happens I will start blasting her about what she has done on a daily basis. Maybe I don't really love her any longer and I just want her back because I feel like I'm being rejected, it is more of a pride then than I honestly want reconciliation. 

I don't know, I'm really confused and hurt. It has been affecting my performance at work and fathering. 

It is like I woke up in the twilight zone 6 months ago and haven't returned.


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## chillymorn

TXDude said:


> Not my blog. I realized today I'm now a cuckold husband since I'm still together with my cheating wife. That led me to google the topic and I found this article or blog on the topic. It seems that this type of "marriage" is very common. I didn't make the decision for this to happen in my marriage. I was devastated on Dday 1 then Dday2 3 4 5 6, one crisis after another. Now it seems I have surrendered to her infidelity and we have a good relationship as long as we don't discuss her cheating. Great sex nearly every night, compassion and friendship together during the day. However she will go away on her phone for an hour or so pretty much daily and have her online fun with other men. Then we are the happy couple having fantastic sex pleasuring each other, not just one sided sex.


whats good for the goose is good for the cuckold >

find a girlfriend. and when she asks just smile.


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## TXDude

chillymorn said:


> whats good for the goose is good for the cuckold >
> 
> find a girlfriend. and when she asks just smile.


I'm not sure how to go about that? I don't have time to go out and meet someone and I don't know a thing about finding an online girlfriend. Also I'm not good at online flirting or sexting, that all seems so childish and I feel ridiculous doing it. After I knew about my wife's cheating for a month or so, I started sexting her thinking that is what she likes and it felt extremely awkward, that's not me. I'll dirty talk during sex, but I feel weird doing it via text message or post on a forum. I guess I could try. What websites should I go to that are free where you can find an online lover and remain anonymous? Not sure if I want to do that, it is not who I am. 

If I were to cheat I would need to meet a single woman and develop the relationship in traditional ways, and I don't have the time for that.


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## Clay2013

So make it obvious. Build accounts on dating sites. Print off girls you like profiles. Leave them laying arround. Put a pass code on your phone. Everytime she walks near you put your phone down or change the screen on your computer. You don't have to be the one doing it you can just leave her the impression she now has competition. Stop sleeping with her. Start going out at night and turning your phone off. 

She will either wake up and realize she is loosing you or she will help you by filing divorce on her own since you can't seem to do it yourself. 

C


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## Emerging Buddhist

TXDude said:


> Another thing that is going through my head is that I'm just holding on because she is disrespecting me and I want to win her back 100% out of pride. Then once that happens I will start blasting her about what she has done on a daily basis. Maybe I don't really love her any longer and I just want her back because I feel like I'm being rejected, it is more of a pride then than I honestly want reconciliation.



Put the pride aside and your mind will get right rather quickly...



Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## Tron

I'm curious, have you confirmed that she has gotten physical with any of these other men?


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## ne9907

blah blah blah.... more blah... blah... blah...


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## bryanp

Denial is not a river in Egypt.


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## TXDude

Tron said:


> I'm curious, have you confirmed that she has gotten physical with any of these other men?


I have no evidence that she has gone physical with any of these men that she is having online masturbation, sexting, nude photo sharing with. My gut tells me she has, but I don't have any proof yet.


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## Broken at 20

Well, going off your post, you don't sound like a cuckold. To be a cuckold, one of your kids has to have been fathered by another man, and is being raised by you. 

You do sound like a doormat, beta, spineless, codependent, mess. But not a cuckold. 

Why do you want this person? 

It's like wanting to buy a house that has a dump and nuclear power plant as neighbors. It's going to kill you painfully and slowly, and everyone is going to wonder WTH you were thinking staying there. 

Though, at least with my example, you have a chance to get some kind of super powers living next to a dump and nuclear power plant. Staying with your cheating wife will just make you a very hollow, resentful, shell of a person. And it will take much longer to kill you than the house will.


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## Bibi1031

TXDude said:


> Not a troll.
> 
> *Well, can't take most of this crazy $hit at face value you know :surprise:*
> 
> 
> This is what is happening in my life right now. Yeah it is easy to say get some balls and blow up the marriage, but that is harder to do when you think how it is going to affect your children and immediate family.
> 
> *Wrong dude! You didn't blow up anything, she did! Your responsibility is to do damage control. Part of damage control is to stop having sex with the one that did blow up the family. And you need to get your head out of the sand yesterday. What are you 10, do you still believe in superman? Well, there is no Superman to come rescue you. How old are your kids?*
> 
> I already talked to some family and they all want me to ride it out, that she is probably going through a mental illness right now. That you can't blame a person for their illness.
> 
> *That's pure:*:bsflag:
> 
> It seems things have slowed down a bit with her online activity, maybe we could be reaching a turning point.
> 
> *Not likely*
> 
> Another thing that is going through my head is that I'm just holding on because she is disrespecting me and I want to win her back 100% out of pride. Then once that happens I will start blasting her about what she has done on a daily basis. Maybe I don't really love her any longer and I just want her back because *I feel like I'm being rejected,* it is more of a pride then than I honestly want reconciliation.
> 
> *This is expected. You run a whole gamma of emotions and most are not pretty at all*
> 
> *Newsflash: Once you have been rejected, you can't be unrejected. It is what it is *
> 
> I don't know, I'm really confused and hurt. It has been affecting my performance at work and fathering.
> 
> *Very normal. Your wife pulled the rug from under you. You are trying to figure out what the hell blew your life up to pieces dude.*
> 
> It is like I woke up in the twilight zone 6 months ago and haven't returned.



Twilight zone analogy is spot on!


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## phillybeffandswiss

Broken at 20 said:


> Well, going off your post, you don't sound like a cuckold. To be a cuckold, one of your kids has to have been fathered by another man, and is being raised by you.


No this is incorrect on many levels.


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## LucasJackson

Clay2013 said:


> So make it obvious. Build accounts on dating sites. Print off girls you like profiles. Leave them laying arround. Put a pass code on your phone. Everytime she walks near you put your phone down or change the screen on your computer. You don't have to be the one doing it you can just leave her the impression she now has competition. Stop sleeping with her. Start going out at night and turning your phone off.
> 
> She will either wake up and realize she is loosing you or she will help you by filing divorce on her own since you can't seem to do it yourself.
> 
> C


This is awesome. It goes against what all the eggheads say to do but it would be so much more satisfying to fight fire with fire.


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## GusPolinski

TXDude said:


> I have no evidence that she has gone physical with any of these men that she is having online masturbation, sexting, nude photo sharing with. My gut tells me she has, but I don't have any proof yet.


Why do you need proof of this? What she's doing _openly_ should be _more than enough_ to prompt you to take action.

That said, if you absolutely must have proof of physical infidelity before doing anything about it, get your hands on the phone. You should find everything that you need there.

_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## niceguy28

OP stop putting your wife on a pedestal. You are a cuckhold if you chose to let her do what she wants with no consequences. If you like this arrangement then more power to you but if you don't you need to man up. If you got kids and don't wanna go through the drama of divorcing this chick then fight fire with fire. There is nothing stopping you from meeting people yourself. I'm sure there are some women out there who are better looking than your wife that you might be able to hook up with. Get yourself in shape, go by yourself some new clothes and tell your wife that you don't give a fck about her or what she does but that she better make damn sure that she gives you sex when you want it or she can pack her bags. Then tell her that you want to experience more "exotic" women yourself and go forth and enjoy yourself. Stop giving these females all of this power. Be a man.


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## *Deidre*

:laugh:


TXDude said:


> I have no evidence that she has gone physical with any of these men that she is having online masturbation, sexting, nude photo sharing with. My gut tells me she has, but I don't have any proof yet.


Seems like a risky way to hold onto a marriage. If she is sleeping around, and then sleeping with you...she could bring home a disease. If your dignity doesn't matter, that should.


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## niceguy28

TXDude said:


> I'm not sure how to go about that? I don't have time to go out and meet someone and I don't know a thing about finding an online girlfriend. Also I'm not good at online flirting or sexting, that all seems so childish and I feel ridiculous doing it. After I knew about my wife's cheating for a month or so, I started sexting her thinking that is what she likes and it felt extremely awkward, that's not me. I'll dirty talk during sex, but I feel weird doing it via text message or post on a forum. I guess I could try. What websites should I go to that are free where you can find an online lover and remain anonymous? Not sure if I want to do that, it is not who I am.
> *
> If I were to cheat I would need to meet a single woman and develop the relationship in traditional ways, and I don't have the time for that.*


It's not that difficult man. All you have to do is go out and be friendly with females. Sooner or later you will run into somebody who will give you exactly what you need. I would still wear my ring as a matter of fact. Believe it or not that actually makes a lot of women want you even more. If you hit on a woman as a married man then you will get shot down immediately but if you just casually flirt and just be nice then you will be successful.


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## drifter777

TXDude said:


> I have no evidence that she has gone physical with any of these men that she is having online masturbation, sexting, nude photo sharing with. My gut tells me she has, but I don't have any proof yet.


It seems to me that your wife is trying out the "Hotwife" lifestyle. Since it's pretty much without your approval or - more importantly - your request then it definitely leans toward Cuckolding. There is a difference here. In the hotwife case the husband gets off knowing his wife is having sex with other men. Him watching them have sex may or may not be part of the deal. Usually it's just knowing she's with other men and getting all of the juicy details of the encounter from wifey when she gets home. The dynamic is that the wife wants more sex than husband can provide. The husband understands this and wants her to be sexually satisfied so they figure out how to accomplish this without killing their marriage. 

Cuckolding is a lot different in that the key dynamic is humiliation of the husband. That really is the only focus - humiliating the husband and him needing that so bad he is happy with the whole thing. 

Both of these are repulsive to me on a personal level but I see nothing wrong with the Cuckold or "Hotwife" lifestyle. To each their own. Maybe you just need to pick the situation that fits and go with it because you clearly are leaning in one of these directions. A husband tolerating his wife openly cheating on the internet is just wrong for a typical man. You love sex with her when she's done playing with the other boys and say that it is the best you've ever had. I think very soon you'll be more than happy to share her sexually as long as it works for both of you in the bedroom. 

If this is your bend then there's no shame in getting the sex you want and making your wife happy and sexually fulfilled at the same time. This is what every couple strive for, right? I acknowledge that there are paths to achieve this goal that I could not take but that doesn't make them wrong for some people.


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## TXDude

drifter777 said:


> It seems to me that your wife is trying out the "Hotwife" lifestyle. Since it's pretty much without your approval or - more importantly - your request then it definitely leans toward Cuckolding. There is a difference here. In the hotwife case the husband gets off knowing his wife is having sex with other men. Him watching them have sex may or may not be part of the deal. Usually it's just knowing she's with other men and getting all of the juicy details of the encounter from wifey when she gets home. The dynamic is that the wife wants more sex than husband can provide. The husband understands this and wants her to be sexually satisfied so they figure out how to accomplish this without killing their marriage.
> 
> Cuckolding is a lot different in that the key dynamic is humiliation of the husband. That really is the only focus - humiliating the husband and him needing that so bad he is happy with the whole thing.
> 
> Both of these are repulsive to me on a personal level but I see nothing wrong with the Cuckold or "Hotwife" lifestyle. To each their own. Maybe you just need to pick the situation that fits and go with it because you clearly are leaning in one of these directions. A husband tolerating his wife openly cheating on the internet is just wrong for a typical man. You love sex with her when she's done playing with the other boys and say that it is the best you've ever had. I think very soon you'll be more than happy to share her sexually as long as it works for both of you in the bedroom.
> 
> If this is your bend then there's no shame in getting the sex you want and making your wife happy and sexually fulfilled at the same time. This is what every couple strive for, right? I acknowledge that there are paths to achieve this goal that I could not take but that doesn't make them wrong for some people.


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## TXDude

drifter777 said:


> It seems to me that your wife is trying out the "Hotwife" lifestyle. Since it's pretty much without your approval or - more importantly - your request then it definitely leans toward Cuckolding. There is a difference here. In the hotwife case the husband gets off knowing his wife is having sex with other men. Him watching them have sex may or may not be part of the deal. Usually it's just knowing she's with other men and getting all of the juicy details of the encounter from wifey when she gets home. The dynamic is that the wife wants more sex than husband can provide. The husband understands this and wants her to be sexually satisfied so they figure out how to accomplish this without killing their marriage.
> 
> Cuckolding is a lot different in that the key dynamic is humiliation of the husband. That really is the only focus - humiliating the husband and him needing that so bad he is happy with the whole thing.
> 
> Both of these are repulsive to me on a personal level but I see nothing wrong with the Cuckold or "Hotwife" lifestyle. To each their own. Maybe you just need to pick the situation that fits and go with it because you clearly are leaning in one of these directions. A husband tolerating his wife openly cheating on the internet is just wrong for a typical man. You love sex with her when she's done playing with the other boys and say that it is the best you've ever had. I think very soon you'll be more than happy to share her sexually as long as it works for both of you in the bedroom.
> 
> If this is your bend then there's no shame in getting the sex you want and making your wife happy and sexually fulfilled at the same time. This is what every couple strive for, right? I acknowledge that there are paths to achieve this goal that I could not take but that doesn't make them wrong for some people.



She knows her online cheating is humiliating and hurting me, I think she gets off on it. I don't. I have threatened divorce, exposure, ect ect and she doesn't care, she just smiles and remains silent for the most part. Not sure how much more I can take. That could be why I'm burying my head in the sand and pretending it is not happening, so I don't totally go insane. 

I need to get my act together and put a plan in place to exit the marriage. I need to find the alpha male in me. 

I neglected her sexually for years because I always had to beg for the booty. When she gave it up I was in hurry because it seemed like she was inconvenienced by giving me some. We should have been communicating our needs better. Now she has discovered that other men find her desirable and she is hooked on the thrill, the chase the attention, the secrecy of the online cheating. 

I'm not a little guy, I'm tall fit and athletic. I run daily and lift and I have a big unit. She tells me I'm good in bed, she has never been able to take all me in, she limits my penetration by stopping me with her arms and legs during sex. When I do hit 100% she squirms back away. I've been tearing her up in bed giving her multiples the last few weeks, dripping sweat all over her, yet she continues with the online activities. 

Again it is like I woke up in the twilight-zone and haven't returned.


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## Lostinthought61

You know this is never going to end well......evenly she will find a man who is an alpha to your beta and you will end up tied to a chair watching her have sex with some dude in front of you and then she will make you eat her....now if that is your thing God love you, but as a fellow Texan, that is not how Texan men roll, maybe Oklahoma. 

Maybe secretly you want that..


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## TXDude

Xenote said:


> You know this is never going to end well......evenly she will find a man who is an alpha to your beta and you will end up tied to a chair watching her have sex with some dude in front of you and then she will make you eat her....now if that is your thing God love you, but as a fellow Texan, that is not how Texan men roll, maybe Oklahoma.
> 
> Maybe secretly you want that..


This is not how I roll, I hate it. I don't share my wife and not going to be a doormat, submissive faithful beta husband no more. I'm done. Time to get a plan together, any suggestions would be appreciated. 

Thanks everyone, time to unleash the caged alpha beast in me.


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## Bibi1031

TXDude said:


> Thanks everyone, time to unleash the caged alpha beast in me.


Let the talk and the walk match now!


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## drifter777

TXDude said:


> This is not how I roll, I hate it. I don't share my wife and not going to be a doormat, submissive faithful beta husband no more. I'm done. Time to get a plan together, any suggestions would be appreciated.
> 
> Thanks everyone, time to unleash the caged alpha beast in me.


An alpha can't unleash his alpha - it's who he is. What you are talking about is anger and that can carry things only so far because she knows you will get over it. And of course anger always fades so she's right - you don't scare her. 

You don't have to be an alpha to have a good marriage - a good life. Beta doesn't mean doormat. We all pretty much are treated the way we allow others to treat us. Your wife, like pretty much all women, loves the attention of men. She wants to be desired and pursued and it's so important to her she's willing to risk your marriage to keep it going. She's also betting that she knows you well enough to know you aren't going to get tough and make her stop this behavior. Sure, you might roar at her and make a fuss but that will blow over because - well, it always has in the past. Then of course she's giving you candy in the bedroom in return for your cooperation. She's got you wrapped around her finger and she's loving it. Are you sure you aren't loving it too? If not then your path is incredibly simple and I have to wonder why you haven't just done this. Here it is: go to her right now and tell her if she sexts or texts or chats or swaps pictures or any other cheating behavior that you will divorce her. Of course she won't believe you so when she gets back on her phone or laptop or whatever you just pack a bag and leave. Check into a hotel for the weekend. Zero contact with her. You spoke of kids so you just tell them you are going hunting or fishing or on a business trip for a few days and you'll see them next week. Leave. I cannot stress strongly enough that you have ZERO contact with her while you are gone. Shut your phone off - do whatever you have to do so that you can stay disciplined on this. On Monday you call a lawyer and get in to see him/her as soon as possible. If I were you I'd stay away at least a week. You will want to talk to your kids so some contact with WW is unavoidable but limit it strictly to logistics related to the kids. Like you'll pick them up at so-and-so time and drop them off at so-and-so time. 

My guess is that it will take a while for her to break. Actually serving her with divorce papers might do it but the complete no contact is your most powerful weapon. Women hate, hate, hate to be ignored. Stay at a hotel as long as you can but at some point you will have to go home. When you do you can still maintain no contact by not engaging or responding to anything she says that isn't about the kids or picking up groceries or whatever. If she wants to talk about her cheating tell her to write you a letter. Keep moving forward with the divorce until she begs you for another chance or you see her at the trial. You don't have to be an alpha to do all of this. You just have to be sick and tired of being treated like she treats you and willing to make a life change.


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## philreag

TXDude said:


> I neglected her sexually for years because I always had to beg for the booty. When she gave it up I was in hurry because it seemed like she was inconvenienced by giving me some.


Dude, this is so backwards.

She cuts off sex and you say you neglected her and had to beg.

So now I understand better, you were sexless, now you're not. You're thinking with the little head.


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## Hope1964

If you're ready to do something, kick her sorry cheating ass to the curb.

I doubt you will though.


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## MattMatt

Actually, you are not a cuckold. 

If you are happy with the situation and do not mind her breaking her marriage vows you would be a witol. 

BTW Insist on STD and HIV tests for her.


----------



## TaDor

cuckold husbands usually like being in that position, right?

Seems like, she is simply cheating on you - in front of your face.


----------



## becareful

TXDude said:


> This is not how I roll, I hate it. I don't share my wife and not going to be a doormat, submissive faithful beta husband no more. I'm done. Time to get a plan together, any suggestions would be appreciated.
> 
> Thanks everyone, time to unleash the caged alpha beast in me.


I've read this entire thread and it just makes me sad. You are everything you say you are not: submissive, beta, doormat. I'm going to throw in neutered, emasculated, defeated, and broken. No man worth his salt would allow his wife or gf to disrespect him this way, and they wouldn't go anywhere near where other men's phallus have been. You accepted crumbs from her like a good little lapdog.

You say you want to win her back due to 100% pride, but what pride? You don't seem to have any left. And why would you want to win back such trash? 

Have her served with divorce papers and go dark. This unremorseful, unrepentant wife does not deserve a second chance. She's garbage; throw her to the curb.


----------



## aine

TXDude said:


> She knows her online cheating is humiliating and hurting me, I think she gets off on it. I don't. I have threatened divorce, exposure, ect ect and she doesn't care, she just smiles and remains silent for the most part. Not sure how much more I can take. That could be why I'm burying my head in the sand and pretending it is not happening, so I don't totally go insane.
> 
> your problem is you are merely threatening her, but no follow through. She has called your bluff and won.
> 
> Does she work? If not take away access to money, leave a bare minimum, cut off internet access, stop paying her phone bill, cut it off, tell her family, your family and friends what she is doing.
> 
> In the mean time go to the gym, get healthy and fit. Take up sports, live you life and show her you are ok. Go see a lawyer, draw up the papers and give them to her. No more threats just action
> 
> I need to get my act together and put a plan in place to exit the marriage. I need to find the alpha male in me.
> 
> I neglected her sexually for years because I always had to beg for the booty. When she gave it up I was in hurry because it seemed like she was inconvenienced by giving me some.
> 
> your wife has absolutely no respect for you. You may not win it back, but take back your power man, show her enoug is enough. You are being a door mat
> 
> 
> 
> We should have been communicating our needs better. Now she has discovered that other men find her desirable and she is hooked on the thrill, the chase the attention, the secrecy of the online cheating.
> 
> I'm not a little guy, I'm tall fit and athletic. I run daily and lift and I have a big unit. She tells me I'm good in bed, she has never been able to take all me in, she limits my penetration by stopping me with her arms and legs during sex. When I do hit 100% she squirms back away. I've been tearing her up in bed giving her multiples the last few weeks, dripping sweat all over her, yet she continues with the online activities.
> 
> maybe part of the problem, is sex is painful and not a pleasant experience for her.mhave you and she discussed this. Seems there is more to what you are saying here
> Again it is like I woke up in the twilight-zone and haven't returned.


----------



## foolscotton3

She controls you with sex.
I imagine she feels a sense of power over you and enjoys that aspect of it, by putting up with it for the scraps she hands you, you have become a very weak individual.

Soon she will discover the rush of having you play cleanup for another man... If she hasn't already.

If I were in your situation I wouldn't show any emotion towards her and casually say, "You know what I was thinking, maybe one of these online boyfriends can take care of you from now on, and I can finally close this chapter of my life and move on to something better." Then present her with the divorce papers.
Sent from my Z936L using Tapatalk


----------



## AlphaHalf

Is this part of your Cuckold fantasy as well. The "I'm a **** who doesn't want to be ****, but lets it happens anyways because I'm a ****" fetish???

F#$k that nonsense, If you really want out then get out. Otherwise I think this post is part of your **** fantasy used to amplify your cuckold fetish. Screw this Rabbit hole.


----------



## just got it 55

TXDude said:


> She knows her online cheating is humiliating and hurting me, I think she gets off on it. I don't. I have threatened divorce, exposure, ect ect and she doesn't care, she just smiles and remains silent for the most part. Not sure how much more I can take. That could be why I'm burying my head in the sand and pretending it is not happening, so I don't totally go insane.
> 
> I need to get my act together and put a plan in place to exit the marriage. I need to find the alpha male in me.
> 
> I neglected her sexually for years because I always had to beg for the booty. When she gave it up I was in hurry because it seemed like she was inconvenienced by giving me some. We should have been communicating our needs better. Now she has discovered that other men find her desirable and she is hooked on the thrill, the chase the attention, the secrecy of the online cheating.
> 
> I'm not a little guy, I'm tall fit and athletic. I run daily and lift and I have a big unit. She tells me I'm good in bed, she has never been able to take all me in, she limits my penetration by stopping me with her arms and legs during sex. When I do hit 100% she squirms back away. I've been tearing her up in bed giving her multiples the last few weeks, dripping sweat all over her, yet she continues with the online activities.
> 
> Again it is like I woke up in the twilight-zone and haven't returned.


I'm out

55


----------



## knobcreek

So just today you realized you enjoy your wife banging other dudes? Clearly this has been a fantasy of yours for some time, but enjoy the discussion I guess...


----------



## knobcreek

becareful said:


> and they wouldn't go anywhere near where other men's phallus have been.


Sorry to break it to you, but anyone dating a woman over 25 has likely gone very near where dozens of phallus's have been.


----------



## 6301

TXDude said:


> She knows her online cheating is humiliating and hurting me, I think she gets off on it. I don't. I have threatened divorce, exposure, ect ect and she doesn't care, she just smiles and remains silent for the most part. Not sure how much more I can take. That could be why I'm burying my head in the sand and pretending it is not happening, so I don't totally go insane.
> 
> I need to get my act together and put a plan in place to exit the marriage. I need to find the alpha male in me.
> 
> I neglected her sexually for years because I always had to beg for the booty. When she gave it up I was in hurry because it seemed like she was inconvenienced by giving me some. We should have been communicating our needs better. Now she has discovered that other men find her desirable and she is hooked on the thrill, the chase the attention, the secrecy of the online cheating.
> 
> I'm not a little guy, I'm tall fit and athletic. I run daily and lift and I have a big unit. She tells me I'm good in bed, she has never been able to take all me in, she limits my penetration by stopping me with her arms and legs during sex. When I do hit 100% she squirms back away. I've been tearing her up in bed giving her multiples the last few weeks, dripping sweat all over her, yet she continues with the online activities.
> 
> Again it is like I woke up in the twilight-zone and haven't returned.


 Seriously? How good can the sex be when she disrespects you? You understand that while your banging away she's thinking of one of those bums on line shes talking to or possibly screwing so is the good sex worth it?

No sir friend when you get used in that manner and just take it day in and day out then you deserve it. If it's me, she would have her ass bounced out and on the street before I would put up with being treated like that. Time for you to wise up and get rid of her. Hit her with divorce papers and see if she's still smiling when you hold the door open and tell her to leave.


----------



## ABHale

TXDude said:


> Not a troll. This is what is happening in my life right now. Yeah it is easy to say get some balls and blow up the marriage, but that is harder to do when you think how it is going to affect your children and immediate family. I already talked to some family and they all want me to ride it out, that she is probably going through a mental illness right now. That you can't blame a person for their illness.
> 
> It seems things have slowed down a bit with her online activity, maybe we could be reaching a turning point.
> 
> Another thing that is going through my head is that I'm just holding on because she is disrespecting me and I want to win her back 100% out of pride. Then once that happens I will start blasting her about what she has done on a daily basis. Maybe I don't really love her any longer and I just want her back because I feel like I'm being rejected, it is more of a pride then than I honestly want reconciliation.
> 
> I don't know, I'm really confused and hurt. It has been affecting my performance at work and fathering.
> 
> It is like I woke up in the twilight zone 6 months ago and haven't returned.




It is only cuckold if you are being humiliated by it.

Second, what is goes around comes around, find someone for yourself. You are in a open relationship. 

BS on the mental illness. I bet everyone would be singing a different tune if you were the one cheating.


----------



## ABHale

TXDude said:


> This is not how I roll, I hate it. I don't share my wife and not going to be a doormat, submissive faithful beta husband no more. I'm done. Time to get a plan together, any suggestions would be appreciated.
> 
> Thanks everyone, time to unleash the caged alpha beast in me.




File for divorce and go from there. 

If you have kids, it is doing more harm seeing their father in this position.

She is getting away with it because you are allowing her to..


----------



## Feeling lost and lonely

This sounds somewhat like my situation. I know my wife had physical affairs before but we tried to work on our marriage because of our kids and then she wanted an open marriage, she has not been with anyone else since our agreement but I was talking to someone I meet on dating website and she got extremely mad at me when not reveling details. That is when I decided we are done and I have retained a lawyer and getting the paperwork they need ready. Now I need to let her and her family know.

Sent from my XT830C using Tapatalk


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## Bibi1031

Feeling lost and lonely said:


> This sounds somewhat like my situation. I know my wife had physical affairs before but we tried to work on our marriage because of our kids and then she wanted an open marriage, she has not been with anyone else since our agreement but I was talking to someone I meet on dating website and she got extremely mad at me when not reveling details. That is when I decided we are done and I have retained a lawyer and getting the paperwork they need ready. Now I need to let her and her family know.
> 
> Sent from my XT830C using Tapatalk


You have reached your line in the sand and are ready to let her go because she is not the person she used to be. T

OP will need to decide what his line in the sand is. It's hard though, especially when you have hopes that the family unit doesn't have to get destroyed.


----------



## BobSimmons

TXDude said:


> she has never been able to take all me in, she limits my penetration by stopping me with her arms and legs during sex. When I do hit 100% she squirms back away. I've been tearing her up in bed giving her multiples the last few weeks, dripping sweat all over her...


:grin2::grin2::grin2: *splash* the sound of the shark jumping


----------



## Mclane

TXDude said:


> She tells me I'm good in bed, she has never been able to take all me in, she limits my penetration by stopping me with her arms and legs during sex. When I do hit 100% she squirms back away. I've been tearing her up in bed giving her multiples the last few weeks, dripping sweat all over her, yet she continues with the online activities.


Maybe you're not trying hard enough.


----------



## Chaparral

TXDude said:


> She knows her online cheating is humiliating and hurting me, I think she gets off on it. I don't. I have threatened divorce, exposure, ect ect and she doesn't care, she just smiles and remains silent for the most part. Not sure how much more I can take. That could be why I'm burying my head in the sand and pretending it is not happening, so I don't totally go insane.
> 
> I need to get my act together and put a plan in place to exit the marriage. I need to find the alpha male in me.
> 
> I neglected her sexually for years because I always had to beg for the booty. When she gave it up I was in hurry because it seemed like she was inconvenienced by giving me some. We should have been communicating our needs better. Now she has discovered that other men find her desirable and she is hooked on the thrill, the chase the attention, the secrecy of the online cheating.
> 
> I'm not a little guy, I'm tall fit and athletic. I run daily and lift and I have a big unit. She tells me I'm good in bed, she has never been able to take all me in, she limits my penetration by stopping me with her arms and legs during sex. When I do hit 100% she squirms back away. I've been tearing her up in bed giving her multiples the last few weeks, dripping sweat all over her, yet she continues with the online activities.
> 
> Again it is like I woke up in the twilight-zone and haven't returned.


So the worse she acts and betrays you the more you reward her? Hmmmmm, doesn't sound like much of a plan.

Hope you haven't caught an STD yet, get checked. Also, DNA your kids. Sounds like she hasn't been in love with you for a long, long time.


----------



## becareful

knobcreek said:


> Sorry to break it to you, but anyone dating a woman over 25 has likely gone very near where dozens of phallus's have been.


The context of my response was in regards to cheating, not past sexual partners before the relationship began.


----------



## Talker67

lets look at this logically. 
If you go on with this cuckold relationship, realize that you will be in a VERY small percentage of men. Maybe less than 1%.

There need to be boundaries, even in cuckolding. Like do you have ANY say in who her partners are? Are you sure they are "clean". Does she 100% wear protection? These are very important questions related to YOUR health going forward.

Can she bring men to your bedroom and your bed? Or is sex to be outside the house only?

I hear that many put a time limit on each relationship. Like she can only sleep with a man 4 times max, then she has to dump him. This supposedly keeps her from falling in love with him.

And what about YOU? Are you given permission to find your own women for play?

Keep your eyes open on this one!


----------



## Talker67

Chaparral said:


> Hope you haven't caught an STD yet, get checked. Also, DNA your kids. Sounds like she hasn't been in love with you for a long, long time.


It WOULD be important to ME to make sure the kids were genetically mine. Given her kinky over the top behavior, it is very possible you are raising some other guys kids. 

And std's...ugh, not even sure WHERE to begin on that. Swingers clubs make ALL the members get tested for STDs before they will let you in to a party. But if your wife is just giving BJs in back of the supermarket to guys she hooked up with on craigslist....that sounds like russian roulette to me.

That she is humiliating you about it all...that IS one trait of the cuckoldress. they get off on humiliating the cuckolded husband. It makes their sex ardor much higher making fun of you. Unless you actually WANT to be treated this way, you will make a very unhappy cuckold!


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## TheTruthHurts

First, I don't believe a word of this. But it's an amusing topic so I'll bite...

The humiliated, jealous feelings are very close to the feelings we get when we're first dating and under the spell of the drugs our systems are making. We are in a competitive mode, trying to win over a new lover. It's intoxicatingly.

Those drugs fade with time and normalcy. However, jealousy can trigger the same panic / competitive drive. If this is real, that's the ONLY thing you actually like about this - the way it makes you feel.

Unfortunately, you have a brain and your brain tells you the truth - the love of your life doesn't respect you, takes joy in your misery, will never again see sex with you as special, will only tolerate you as a TOOL to get her excited by your longing.

You've become a hovering, wimpy, stray dog and she's become a vampire. Not too far off.

Now think about her. She built resentment for your neglect and lost respect for you over time. She went online, and holy cow! - a million guys like free pu$$y! There is literally NO END to the string of men who will shower her with affection and attention if she spreads her legs. Furthermore, a lot of guys LOVE that she is cuckolding you - they're getting the competitive / conquer chemicals your getting while defending and losing.

The problem is the chemicals. Anything can become normal and then the chemicals stop. So how do we counteract this? Go in deeper! Start giving bj's and coming home a little late so you suspect but aren't sure. Your insecurity triggers your juices, an her flagrant cheating AND GETTING AWAY WITH IT trigger her juices. "How far can I go?". Maybe a friend? Neighbor? Someone close to hubby? Maybe come home filled with something but pulling the wool over your eyes.

This is a cartoon version of things but it probably does happen. People cheat for all kinds of reasons. Your W is now doing it for the thrill. That's a very dangerous game.

This us like the old movie "war games". "The only way to win is not to play". So what will you do?


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## BetrayedDad

TXDude said:


> Yes, I know it is wrong, I can feel that it is wrong, it hurts my self-esteem, it hurts my pride, it just hurts my soul really bad. She has no respect for me


And why should she? Can you blame her? You don't even respect yourself.

The day you decided to accept **** status is the day a piece of you died.

You're only salvation is to dump your cheating POS wife who is using you.

Accepting the status quo is accepting a life of abuse and shame. Only you can change it.


----------



## becareful

There is a thread on SI by nambaster (could have spelled his name wrong) in which he says his cheating wife refuses to tell him the name of the hairy guy at her hospital that she's been having an affair with. She claims it's just kissing and groping and the husband believes her. We all know it's highly unlikely that it was just kissing and groping. She refuses to stop seeing the OM. When he insisted on the OM's identity and threatened divorced, his wife called his bluff and soon enough, he came crawling to her begging for her forgiveness. He later this morning posted a picture of her and basically says, "See how pretty my wife is? This is why I don't want to divorce her." 

I wanted to register and lay him out. My gawd, that cuckold is an embarrassment to all red blooded men everywhere.:banghead:


----------



## MattMatt

becareful said:


> There is a thread on SI by nambaster (could have spelled his name wrong) in which he says his cheating wife refuses to tell him the name of the hairy guy at her hospital that she's been having an affair with. She claims it's just kissing and groping and the husband believes her. We all know it's highly unlikely that it was just kissing and groping. She refuses to stop seeing the OM. When he insisted on the OM's identity and threatened divorced, his wife called his bluff and soon enough, he came crawling to her begging for her forgiveness. He later this morning posted a picture of her and basically says, "See how pretty my wife is? This is why I don't want to divorce her."
> 
> I wanted to register and lay him out. * My gawd, that cuckold is an embarrassment to all red blooded men everywhere*.:banghead:


No. It's attitudes like this that make wives like his get all hot under the collar and decide to cheat. Why? Because...



> that cuckold is an embarrassment to all red blooded men everywhere


Nope. The truth is she is an embarrassment to herself and needs psychiatric treatment.


----------



## becareful

MattMatt said:


> No. It's attitudes like this that make wives like his get all hot under the collar and decide to cheat. Why? Because...
> 
> 
> 
> Nope. The truth is she is an embarrassment to herself and needs psychiatric treatment.


You're blaming him for his wife's cheating?


----------



## GusPolinski

becareful said:


> There is a thread on SI by nambaster (could have spelled his name wrong) in which he says his cheating wife refuses to tell him the name of the hairy guy at her hospital that she's been having an affair with. She claims it's just kissing and groping and the husband believes her. We all know it's highly unlikely that it was just kissing and groping. She refuses to stop seeing the OM. When he insisted on the OM's identity and threatened divorced, his wife called his bluff and soon enough, he came crawling to her begging for her forgiveness. He later this morning posted a picture of her and basically says, "See how pretty my wife is? This is why I don't want to divorce her."
> 
> I wanted to register and lay him out. My gawd, that cuckold is an embarrassment to all red blooded men everywhere.:banghead:


Wow.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## MattMatt

becareful said:


> You're blaming him for his wife's cheating?


:wtf:
* How on earth did you manage to read that from what I said? *

I was pointing out that his wife needs psychiatric treatment for her perversions.

And that her husband needs no attacks from any "red blooded males" as he is the victim of his wife's perversions.


----------



## becareful

MattMatt said:


> :wtf:
> * How on earth did you manage to read that from what I said? *
> 
> I was pointing out that his wife needs psychiatric treatment for her perversions.
> 
> And that her husband needs no attacks from any "red blooded males" as he is the victim of his wife's perversions.


I re-read both our posts and correct me if I'm wrong, but on second read, I think you are saying that attitudes of the red blooded males like me cause his wife to cheat? Maybe there's something lost in translation here... Who or what is causing wives like his to cheat?

I'm not sure I completely buy into the notion that he is a complete victim here, since he has said that he doesn't want to divorce her because she's so attractive. I think his weakness is on him and not caused by her. His lack of resolve in begging her for forgiveness is due to his lack of character that was there before the affair.


----------



## Palodyne

becareful said:


> There is a thread on SI by nambaster (could have spelled his name wrong) in which he says his cheating wife refuses to tell him the name of the hairy guy at her hospital that she's been having an affair with. She claims it's just kissing and groping and the husband believes her. We all know it's highly unlikely that it was just kissing and groping. She refuses to stop seeing the OM. When he insisted on the OM's identity and threatened divorced, his wife called his bluff and soon enough, he came crawling to her begging for her forgiveness. He later this morning posted a picture of her and basically says, "See how pretty my wife is? This is why I don't want to divorce her."
> 
> I wanted to register and lay him out. My gawd, that cuckold is an embarrassment to all red blooded men everywhere.:banghead:


 Yeah, I was reading his thread last night. It's definitely frustrating. I wasn't over there this morning so I missed the pic he posted. It's been taken down now.


----------



## MattMatt

becareful said:


> I re-read both our posts and correct me if I'm wrong, but on second read, I think you are saying that attitudes of the red blooded males like me cause his wife to cheat? Maybe there's something lost in translation here... Who or what is causing wives like his to cheat?
> 
> I'm not sure I completely buy into the notion that he is a complete victim here, since he has said that he doesn't want to divorce her because she's so attractive. I think his weakness is on him and not caused by her. His lack of resolve in begging her for forgiveness is due to his lack of character that was there before the affair.


No. That's not what I said. I just think it wrong to kick a fellow when he is down.

His wife is probably a master manipulator who has messed with his mind. That is why I think he is a victim, here.


----------



## wmn1

TXDude said:


> My wife has been having online affairs for about 6 months now. She knows I know and she just smiles at me when I confront her and she will not stop. Surprisingly, we are having the best sex we have had in decades. I would say better sex than when we 1st met 19 years ago. At 1st I was mad, jealous, hurt, humiliated, broken hearted ect. Now I am calm about her online and probably physical relationships with other men. She flirts on the phone before bed in our bathroom for about an hour, then comes to bed and I give her multiple O's before I finish. Before the affairs are sex was pretty bad, now it is great, I do all I can to last as long as possible and pleasure her.
> 
> I'm now a cuckold husband and I'm not sure that I like the role. I like the improvement in our sex together but I don't like her sharing herself with other men. I'm not as freaked out about it as I was when I found out it several months ago, but I can tell it is hurting my self-esteem it is hurting me mentally.
> 
> I found an interesting article about cuckold marriages that is worth a read.
> 
> https://cuckoldcouple.wordpress.com/the-science-of-cuckoldry/



First of all, thanks for sharing that nasty link that justifies women cheating on their husbands. Just because you are opening yourself up to this crap doesn't mean that you have to broadcast such disgusting material here.

Enjoy your hysterical bonding all you want. At least I go to bed every night knowing that I am not sharing my wife with anyone and things are fine


----------



## wmn1

TXDude said:


> I'm not sure how to go about that? I don't have time to go out and meet someone and I don't know a thing about finding an online girlfriend. Also I'm not good at online flirting or sexting, that all seems so childish and I feel ridiculous doing it. After I knew about my wife's cheating for a month or so, I started sexting her thinking that is what she likes and it felt extremely awkward, that's not me. I'll dirty talk during sex, but I feel weird doing it via text message or post on a forum. I guess I could try. What websites should I go to that are free where you can find an online lover and remain anonymous? Not sure if I want to do that, it is not who I am.
> 
> If I were to cheat I would need to meet a single woman and develop the relationship in traditional ways, and I don't have the time for that.


so how does she have time for that ???? Hmmm.. let me guess, you work while she plays you for a fool


----------



## LucasJackson

becareful said:


> There is a thread on SI by nambaster (could have spelled his name wrong) in which he says his cheating wife refuses to tell him the name of the hairy guy at her hospital that she's been having an affair with. She claims it's just kissing and groping and the husband believes her. We all know it's highly unlikely that it was just kissing and groping. She refuses to stop seeing the OM. When he insisted on the OM's identity and threatened divorced, his wife called his bluff and soon enough, he came crawling to her begging for her forgiveness. He later this morning posted a picture of her and basically says, "See how pretty my wife is? This is why I don't want to divorce her."
> 
> I wanted to register and lay him out. My gawd, that cuckold is an embarrassment to all red blooded men everywhere.:banghead:


Call me old fashioned but that kind of weakness in males really disgusts me.


----------



## Palodyne

I am all about communication. Talking things out, finding amicable solutions. That said, if I found out my wife was carrying on online affairs, and I sat her down to speak to her about how it hurt me. And she just sat there and smiled at me till I finished and went back to her other men. There would be no other discussion.

The next morning I would shut off all phone and internet service to the house. Any tablet, laptop, desk top computer, or cell phone that I had paid for would have the screens busted with a hammer. Then I would sit down with an old fashioned magazine to read till she came down screaming and yelling. Then I would sit there and smile at her till she was done, then go back to my magazine.


----------



## MattMatt

Palodyne said:


> I am all about communication. Talking things out, finding amicable solutions. That said, if I found out my wife was carrying on online affairs, and I sat her down to speak to her about how it hurt me. And she just sat there and smiled at me till I finished and went back to her other men. There would be no other discussion.
> 
> The next morning I would shut off all phone and internet service to the house. Any tablet, laptop, desk top computer, or cell phone that I had paid for would have the screens busted with a hammer. Then I would sit down with an old fashioned magazine to read till she came down screaming and yelling. Then I would sit there and smile at her till she was done, then go back to my magazine.


That would be satisfying wouldn't it? 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Sports Fan

You say you prefer to Bury your head in the sand. 

When she passes on an STD you cant bury yourself from that.

Have some pride man up and kick this ***** to the kerb


----------



## the guy

Wait a second folks....OP is not getting off on this shyt his old lady is pulling!

****'s don't get laid...the way I see it is he's getting "it" but the PSOB has to pay a price for the "good stuff" so he "buries his head in the sand".

I'm guessing here but OP is banging his old lady like a wh0re and at the end of the day they are both missing out on how to make love!

That kind of shyt will phuck up the marriage even more(I know...been there). This is a case of unhealthy behaviors phucking up a marriage even more, so it's time for both of them to shyt or get of the pot and start learning the tools to have a healthy relationship.

The way I see it is if they stopped treating each other like some "john' and some "trick" they might like each other more...but then again who am I to judge. I like tricks!lol

So is your old lady coming home with soiled panties and you are going down on her with a smile on your face, or is she getting off on this online bull shyt and you taking a turn on her? Either way you guys are phucked up and the both of you need to set some dam boundaries that will but a stop to this phucked up behavior.

That's my $0.02


----------



## bandit.45

This gawddamned website has fallen down the cosmic bunny hole. 

Un-fvcking-believable that we are giving this guy the time of day.


----------



## TheTruthHurts

bandit.45 said:


> This gawddamned website has fallen down the cosmic bunny hole.
> 
> Un-fvcking-believable that we are giving this guy the time of day.


It's been down there as long as I've been here.


----------



## LucasJackson

TheTruthHurts said:


> It's been down there as long as I've been here.


I'm convinced that 99% of the stories here are pure fiction.


----------



## ThePheonix

TXDude said:


> This is not how I roll, I hate it. I don't share my wife and not going to be a doormat, submissive faithful beta husband no more.


Tex, you know you like the idea of another cowboy riding your filly. You being the "victim" as you portray here, is a major element of your pleasure. In your dreams you're the alpha male. But you're not and you don't want to be. You "casually" point out that the little lady is the dominate one. The only surprising thing in your story is that you're not claiming you're to small to satisfy her.
You get aroused by mental anguish my man and love the roll you're playing. Why don't you just come out an scream it.


----------



## foolscotton3

This song immediately reminded me of this guy's post

Sent from my Z936L using Tapatalk


----------



## MattMatt

OP, have you ever considered *not* pandering to your wife's perverted desires?

Oh, yes! And do please remind her that websites like dirtystories.etc are fictional sites and are *not* How to Guides?


----------



## TXDude

A lot has happened since I last posted. My 1st post which I deleted in January 2016 was when I walked in on my WW taking nude photos and she kept her phone locked. She was meeting men on myfitnesspal and sexting with them on KIK and Skype. Video sexting when my son and I were not in the house, when she went on business trips ect. Then gifts started arriving from these men with notes that they hoped to meet her in person. My WW went on to start a secret private Instagram account and she had 19 men followers all from myfitnesspal. In July of 2016 the wife of one of the men she was sexting with and was on her secret IG account contacted me. The OBS was getting into her WH's phone and documenting the affair for months. She researched online and found the identity of my WW and me. The OBS called me and told me about it but would not tell me her name or her husband's name. I confronted my wife and she turned around and told those men that one of their wives had found out, and boy all those men disappeared like a fart in the wind. They didn't know whose wife it was. LOL Anyway the OBS sent me all she collected and wow it was really bad. 

So my WW got off all social media, unlocked her phone and wants to stay together. I just filed for D 2 weeks ago. She put me through 11 months of hell, having affairs in my face, while I stupidity played the pick me dance. 

When she was on business trip's my son and I would call her while I'm reading him a bedtime story and tell her goodnight and she would tell us she loved us and missed us, then once off the phone she would live skype masturbate with these guys. After she became transparent I found voice recorded message from one of the men, he would to a voice recorded message on his phone and email it to her. Then had plans to meet in person. I was so excited to finally meet her, all the naughty things he was going to do, ect ect ect blah blah blah. 

Anyway, I finally put an end to this nightmare. I'm not going to waste another year of my life being abused and living in infidelity. I feel so so so much better now that I have filed. Going to use the my share of the equity from our home to buy my new house and the remainder will go into a college fund for my son. I'm looking forward to my future again, feeling proud again.


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## Lostinthought61

TX dude, if you ever find yourself in austin i will buy you a beer...that woman is broken and her moral compass is hosed, you can't fix her......be the best dad you can be and make sure your son does not make the same mistake. one day when you are happily in a relationship with someone who truly only you, she will wake in some strange bed and realize how screwed up she is....i am so glad you came back....cuckold no more.


----------



## arbitrator

GusPolinski said:


> So stop settling for virtual sloppy seconds and divorce.
> 
> Otherwise it won't be long before you're getting _actual_ sloppy seconds.
> 
> Hell, like you said, you might be already.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


*What would make a rationale man or woman come to the conclusion that he's not already residing in "Sloppy Secondsville?"*


----------



## TXDude

She was gaslighting my ass, making me think I was crazy. Her phone was locked so I couldn't get in it.


----------



## Satya

Good for you! Welcome to the start of your new, improved life!


----------



## ChipperE

Congrats. Divorcing a cheater is hard sometimes because you want to believe you are enough for someone, but the truth is, some people are just messed up in the head and need multiple sources of attention. I wish you all the best moving forward.


----------



## TXDude

My STBXWW was so addicted to the attention, addicted to the validation. On her secret IG account, she would post a sexy selfie daily and all those man-*****s she met from myfitnesspal would comment, "sexy baby", "you are so hot", and boy she would eat it up, she loved the attention. The sexting would happen in the private message on IG, you can send pics in private with messages, and she would do it all Skype as well. 

She became a real pro at it, she had 93 porn selfies on her phone, so she could sext from the office, no need to take a nude pic she had 93 saved on her phone ready to go. 

So glad that OBS contacted me, that is what blew this whole thing up. Not me begging her to stop and her laughing and smiling in my face, this OBS threatened to expose my WW's sexting affair with her husband to my WW's employer, to the HR department, because it was time stamped and she even said during the sexting she was at work. LOL So that fear of being expose at work and to her friends woke her up and she stopped and became transparent. 

Well it was too late, after I saw how bad it was, after I read the sexting convos and seen the pictures, she even sent video, I was done, too much to forgive, too much to forget, too much to get past.


----------



## TXDude

Yeah she built herself an online harem of 19 man-hores on her secret IG account, that was her online harem of man-hores.


----------



## Herschel

**** her. Seriously dude. **** her. She will have to live with her lying, cheating piece of ass til the day she dies.


----------



## jorgegene

and she probably thinks she's just a misunderstood, great gal that was just caught up in harmless flings.

i bet she's still proud as a pea****.

just like my ex. they seem to all live on the shores of lake denial.


----------



## turnera

So she's said after you filed that she wanted to stay together?


----------



## Evinrude58

My ex wife was into that crap, too. I'll bet she's still secretly doing it while married to the new sugar daddy. She still works out and worries about her appearance. There's no way she's satisfied with just one man's attention. She'll be physically cheating in not too long, as well.

I suspect your wife is addicted to that stuff, and she will never stop. She likely doesn't even want to stop. She's probably working at finding a new batch of guys as we speak.
I could tell while I was groveling and pleading and "talking" to my ex while we were in our separation period that she was really proud of her sexting skills and thought of me as less of a man because my sexting skills were non-existant. I even tried it with her a couple of times hoping to satisfy her urges for that crap. It left me feeling like total trash to lower myself to do that with my cheating ex. I would never consider dating a woman that liked that kind of stuff now. My current gf NEVER even considered sending me a "picture", nor sexts, or anything like that. She has far more class.

You will be glad you divorced from this cheating attention junkie.


----------



## Grapes

*<high five>*


----------



## GusPolinski




----------



## TXDude

I have moved into the guest room a couple of weeks ago and had her served. I'm going for full custody of our son. I have been keeping a log that shows I'm his primary care giver, I have been from the beginning because I telecommute (work from home). 

She is begging me for another chance, she got off social media and doesn't use her smartphone. She has her dad lobbying me for reconciliation. I told him, "look, you don't have to live with her, I do, and I shouldn't have to remain in an abusive marriage". 

She claims that she was addicted to it and couldn't stop, and it took something big like the threat of public exposure by the OBS to break her. 

I just can't get over what she has done, and now I know what she is capable of that is not someone I want to stay with. I begged from January until August and she just kept on doing it in my face. She was baking me a birthday cake and asked me to come taste the icing and there was her phone with a message from a man, yup she was messaging with one of her online man w hores will making my birthday cake. I could go on and on about the h ell she put me through, but no need you guys get it. 

Anyway I'm feeling good, in control, I no longer worry about what she is doing, no urges to snoop, I just look forward to my new life. I've been getting the house ready to sell, looking online at homes for sale, make plans for a fresh start.


----------



## browser

arbitrator said:


> *What would make a rationale man or woman come to the conclusion that he's not already residing in "Sloppy Secondsville?"*


 @arbitrator

This is the second post of yours I've read in the past 10 minutes that makes it obvious you only read the first few posts of a multipage thread and then jump right in without getting up to speed on the current state of the Ops situation.

You just might want to consider taking a bit more time to get caught up on the thread before you throw up a post that is completely irrelevant.


----------



## TDSC60

Congrats on finding your balls.

She just smiled at you while you were begging her to stop. Selfish to the extreme. No respect or love for you at all.

She only stopped after OBS threatened exposure to HR. Was one of her OM a coworker? Still another selfish act. She did not stop because she felt guilty, or because she regretted her actions had caused others pain, or did not want to hurt you anymore. She stopped so she would not lose something she cared about - her job.

Definitely divorce.


----------



## sokillme

TXDude said:


> I have moved into the guest room a couple of weeks ago and had her served. I'm going for full custody of our son. I have been keeping a log that shows I'm his primary care giver, I have been from the beginning because I telecommute (work from home).
> 
> She is begging me for another chance, she got off social media and doesn't use her smartphone. She has her dad lobbying me for reconciliation. I told him, "look, you don't have to live with her, I do, and I shouldn't have to remain in an abusive marriage".
> 
> She claims that she was addicted to it and couldn't stop, and it took something big like the threat of public exposure by the OBS to break her.
> 
> I just can't get over what she has done, and now I know what she is capable of that is not someone I want to stay with. I begged from January until August and she just kept on doing it in my face. She was baking me a birthday cake and asked me to come taste the icing and there was her phone with a message from a man, yup she was messaging with one of her online man w hores will making my birthday cake. I could go on and on about the h ell she put me through, but no need you guys get it.
> 
> Anyway I'm feeling good, in control, I no longer worry about what she is doing, no urges to snoop, I just look forward to my new life. I've been getting the house ready to sell, looking online at homes for sale, make plans for a fresh start.


You are on your way my friend. Leave the crazy behind, she really was the cruelest of the cruel to you. Let her Dad live with her.


----------



## VFW

Glad that you finally saw value in yourself and realized you deserve better. It is high unlikely that she would change anyway, I think you have made a good decision. You still have a long hard row to hoe, but you and your son will be better for it in the long run.


----------



## honcho

TXDude said:


> I have moved into the guest room a couple of weeks ago and had her served. I'm going for full custody of our son. I have been keeping a log that shows I'm his primary care giver, I have been from the beginning because I telecommute (work from home).
> 
> She is begging me for another chance, she got off social media and doesn't use her smartphone. She has her dad lobbying me for reconciliation. I told him, "look, you don't have to live with her, I do, and I shouldn't have to remain in an abusive marriage".
> 
> She claims that she was addicted to it and couldn't stop, and it took something big like the threat of public exposure by the OBS to break her.
> 
> I just can't get over what she has done, and now I know what she is capable of that is not someone I want to stay with. I begged from January until August and she just kept on doing it in my face. She was baking me a birthday cake and asked me to come taste the icing and there was her phone with a message from a man, yup she was messaging with one of her online man w hores will making my birthday cake. I could go on and on about the h ell she put me through, but no need you guys get it.
> 
> Anyway I'm feeling good, in control, I no longer worry about what she is doing, no urges to snoop, I just look forward to my new life. I've been getting the house ready to sell, looking online at homes for sale, make plans for a fresh start.


She is right, she is addicted and she can't stop, unfortunately they rarely can break the habit. Often they just get better at hiding it which fuels the high they get from it or they get bored and start to chase it again.


----------



## *Deidre*

Glad you're healing and moving forward without your toxic wife. Stay strong.


----------



## JohnA

I've been following your story for a while. Does the thread disk digger and 50 shades belong to you as well?


----------



## lordmayhem

TXDude said:


> A lot has happened since I last posted. My 1st post which I deleted in January 2016 was when I walked in on my WW taking nude photos and she kept her phone locked. She was meeting men on myfitnesspal and sexting with them on KIK and Skype. Video sexting when my son and I were not in the house, when she went on business trips ect. Then gifts started arriving from these men with notes that they hoped to meet her in person. My WW went on to start a secret private Instagram account and she had 19 men followers all from myfitnesspal. In July of 2016 the wife of one of the men she was sexting with and was on her secret IG account contacted me. The OBS was getting into her WH's phone and documenting the affair for months. She researched online and found the identity of my WW and me. The OBS called me and told me about it but would not tell me her name or her husband's name. I confronted my wife and she turned around and told those men that one of their wives had found out, and boy all those men disappeared like a fart in the wind. They didn't know whose wife it was. LOL Anyway the OBS sent me all she collected and wow it was really bad.


Yet another example of why you should expose to the OMW/OWH. TXDude would not have know about all this without the info from the OMW. And in some instances, the OMW/OWH may actually have more info about the affair than you do.


----------



## JohnA

Hi

Do not be rushed into reconciliation. There are basic truths out there you don't know, questions that linger but need to be truthfully answered. Got to ask about FOO or CSA issues. (Family Of Origin, Childhood Sexual Assault). If these are present combined with her recent acting out the future is very grim. While I know it happens I have not read one thread here or else where the marriage did not end in divorce. The logic is twisted, but once reviewed is clear. 

At this point friends and families are pushing but only you live with her and with yourself. First define yourself. Understand one truth above all else: she has defined only herself with her actions not you. Your choices going forward (and only your choices) define you. I can tell you that you are not a ****, if you need to ask your not.


----------



## KaggyBear

your wife sounds awful omg.


----------



## TXDude

WW wanted to talk so I agreed, she pushed again for R and I said no. Before I said no I played along and was able to get some more details about her sexting. I found out that she was sexting at night in our marital bed while I was sleeping next to her. IMO that is the same as having sex with a man in our bed, maybe worse because I was sleeping next to her, also she was doing it during our ski trip last year while she was on vacation with me and our son. She was sexting many times in our bed while I was sleeping next to her, that IMO is unforgivable and reinforces the decision for divorce. 

Maybe if she was sincerely remorseful I would entertain possible R, however she is not and still feels somewhat justified with her betrayal.


----------



## TXDude

Telling men what a bad husband I am then telling them she wants them to c um in her mouth and sending nudes, this went all from Dec thru Aug, it is too much to overcome.


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## Bananapeel

Glad you are seeing things clearly. I can't imagine anyone wanting to be married to a woman like that.


----------



## browser

TXDude said:


> I played along and was able to get some more details about her sexting. I found out that she was sexting at night in our marital bed while I was sleeping next to her.


You dont want or need any more details, even though you think you do.

You've got more than enough material to mess with your head for years to cum.


----------



## jb02157

browser said:


> You dont want or need any more details, even though you think you do.
> 
> You've got more than enough material to mess with your head for years to cum.


I would think that more details would do more harm than good at this point. She could stop her behavior but chooses not to. Either way the only thing to do now is leave her.


----------



## Cynthia

I agree. All these details are each like another strike against your back with a whip. You know all you need to know. Any further information will only serve to cause you more pain.


----------



## MyRevelation

TXDude said:


> Telling men what a bad husband I am then telling them she wants them to c um in her mouth and sending nudes, this went all from Dec thru Aug, it is too much to overcome.


Maybe I'm combining info from your posts on SI, but I don't have posting privileges at SI, so I'll address it here. Since FIL is still trying to get you to R with his special snowflake ... why not share some of this info with him ... maybe even let him know that you have the password protected thumbdrive that you think has the really bad sexting stuff and simply ask him ... "If that was your W, rather than your D, would you R?" FIL is inserting himself into your M without knowing the whole story ... maybe its time you educated him.

Also, don't underestimate the value of possessing that thumbdrive in property and custody settlement negotiations. In reality, it contains 2 bombshell trump cards for you to play if/when the time is right ... 1st is the actual knowledge that it's in your possession and uncracked ... 2nd is the knowledge that you will spare no expense to jailbreak it, if necessary, and in both cases, the "threat" of exposure is more valuable than the actual exposure.


----------



## Stillasamountain

TXDude said:


> Her phone was locked so I couldn't get in it.



I will never ever understand why this isn't an automatic deal breaker.


----------



## ulyssesheart

browser said:


> You dont want or need any more details, even though you think you do.
> 
> You've got more than enough material *to mess with your head for years to cum.*


Naw, he is not a ****. He cannot have an O with these thoughts dancing naked in his head!

She is a piece of work. A piece of wack.


----------



## JohnA

Actually I think he is the female version of a woman who's husband is a porn addicted. I wonder what @EleGirl and @Affaircare thoughts on this might be. But to follow your logic is the wife of a porn acted a lesbian and wants PSE sex non stop?? If you are married ask your wife. 

TXdude I look at your wife and her behavior and it screams FOO or CSA right down to how quickly she latched onto you. She was 23 new college grad you 30, 31 divorced two daughters. In short solid dependable older man. Daddy issues??? Often @Uptown can offer a great deal of insight, though his primary insights are into BPD there is so much overlap he nails it often. But he will need to read your other threads on SI. I do not have posting rights there but I have two of your threads booked marked. Your forum (SI) do not allow for posting links from other sites to SI. But if Uptown is interested and you read his posts and want him to I can PM him the links. Note he will not post on SI because of their policy regarding links. Uptown is one of the most carefully researched posters I have read anywhere. If he posts it, he can link it to solid source(s). 

In any event FIL may be part of the problem. This is not something you say or imply to him, but you need to consider. 

Txdude come on you know she went PA at least once. The full wax, unnecessary business trip?


----------



## lordmayhem

TXDude said:


> Maybe if she was sincerely remorseful I would entertain possible R, however she is not and still feels somewhat justified with her betrayal.


That right there shows that R should be off the table.


----------



## VladDracul

TXDude said:


> Maybe if she was sincerely remorseful I would entertain possible R, however she is not and still feels somewhat justified with her betrayal.


Why would she be remorseful for something she enjoys and willing to persue? Of course she feels fully (not somewhat) justified. Any tort has three elements; motivation, opportunity (you were asleep beside her for example) and justification/rationalization so her "justifying" it a given. Beside, she knows you well enough to know you'll likely let her walk back in anytime she wants.


----------



## JohnA

Remorse is not an on off switch. You filed what is the waiting period? One important element is understanding that any change she makes must be for herself so she never hurts anyone like this again. Let her use the waiting period to gain the understanding and make the changes that are needed married to you or not.


----------



## GusPolinski

TXDude said:


> WW wanted to talk so I agreed, she pushed again for R and I said no. Before I said no I played along and was able to get some more details about her sexting. I found out that she was sexting at night in our marital bed while I was sleeping next to her. IMO that is the same as having sex with a man in our bed, maybe worse because I was sleeping next to her, also she was doing it during our ski trip last year while she was on vacation with me and our son. She was sexting many times in our bed while I was sleeping next to her, that IMO is unforgivable and reinforces the decision for divorce.
> 
> Maybe if she was sincerely remorseful I would entertain possible R, however she is not and still feels somewhat justified with her betrayal.


I'll go ahead and say what should (at least by now) be painfully obvious to you --

Given that she spent months engaging in this behavior, in spite of the obvious anguish that it caused you (and regardless of your tacit approval), it is simply not possible for her to feel any remorse for having done it.

She doesn't now.

She didn't yesterday.

She won't tomorrow.

And mark my words, if at some point it appears that she _is_ remorseful, you can pretty much write that off as learned behavior.

She might feel some regret for the impending loss of her marriage, home, and family, but regret and remorse aren't the same thing.

Not by a long shot.


----------



## alte Dame

There's a certain personality type that just becomes unbearable when showered with flattery, approval, and validation. This type of person buys into all of it and truly believes that he/she is worth all of the attention because he/she is obviously generically superior. Your WW lapped up all of the attention & loved to feel the object of so many men's attention. It gave her a sense of power and entitlement - just look how desirable she was! She had close to 100 men drooling over her every day! What an ego trip!

You can say it's an addiction, but whatever it is it's a huge character flaw, in my opinion. It's the sexual equivalent of a megalomaniac.

And as she did this, she devalued you. To her you were a lesser mortal, one who wasn't so desirable, superior, powerful. She felt invincible and better than you.

How sad this is, since her behavior actually proved her to be pathetic. She needed cheap, sordid affairs to make her feel better than you. Some people join the Peace Corps to distinguish themselves. Your WW got into the gutter, all the time thinking it made her a star.

She needs serious help and you should keep doing what you are doing. Get away from her and try to heal.


----------



## stillthinking

> Telling men what a bad husband I am then telling them she wants them to c um in her mouth and sending nudes, this went all from Dec thru Aug, it is too much to overcome.


Well then fine. According to her own words, you divorcing her is a win win situation.

She gets what she wants. To be rid of you, the "Bad" husband. And find various guys to cum in her mouth. Apparently that is her dream.

You get to cut loose from a cheating, lying, soon to be villiage bicycle. And then you can find a women who will love you and be faithful. There are lots out there.

Stay strong man.


----------



## TXDude

Going for full custody so my attorney advised me to get all the infidelity evidence together. I went back in my WW's secret yahoo account to make sure I got everything that was in there. She used that account to open her secret Skype and Instagram accounts. Well wouldn't you know I missed an email from one of her sexting partners. Attached to the email was a short video clip of him jacking off. LOL Surprisingly I wasn't even upset, didn't start shaking, no trauma!!! I think I'm healing, I'm getting past it. Can't believe I missed it the 1st time I went through it. This guy also sent her a bunch of voice messages, he would record a 10 minute voice message with his phone then save it and send it via email. They had plans to meet up, he wanted her to try a butt plug, he wanted to do some "backdoor loving". 

Anyway, I want to let him know that I've seen him in all his glory. I was thinking about sending it back to him and tell him I will delete it if he sends everything my WW sent to him. But that could lead to legal issues possibly. I still want him to know I've seen it and I have it. I don't think it would be illegal for me to foward that email with his whack-off video on it and tell him something like, "nice whack-off dude, great form, great finish" or something similar. Maybe, "dude you are brave sending this crap out, especially to a married woman, you miserable POS". 

I don't know what are you guys thoughts? Should I just let it go? I really don't want to, I don't really see the harm in letting him know I have it.


----------



## Lostinthought61

Do you know if he is married or where he lives? I don't a problem requesting him to forward all of the emails sent to him....if he say n then fine, but you might want to remind him that you are gather evident in your case and his video is part of that evidence so then he maybe agreeable....and clearly if he was smart he would disappear shortly after. No black mailing just a nice request....assume he thought she was single.


----------



## GusPolinski

TXDude said:


> Going for full custody so my attorney advised me to get all the infidelity evidence together. I went back in my WW's secret yahoo account to make sure I got everything that was in there. She used that account to open her secret Skype and Instagram accounts. Well wouldn't you know I missed an email from one of her sexting partners. Attached to the email was a short video clip of him jacking off. LOL Surprisingly I wasn't even upset, didn't start shaking, no trauma!!! I think I'm healing, I'm getting past it. Can't believe I missed it the 1st time I went through it. This guy also sent her a bunch of voice messages, he would record a 10 minute voice message with his phone then save it and send it via email. They had plans to meet up, he wanted her to try a butt plug, he wanted to do some "backdoor loving".
> 
> Anyway, I want to let him know that I've seen him in all his glory. I was thinking about sending it back to him and tell him I will delete it if he sends everything my WW sent to him. But that could lead to legal issues possibly. I still want him to know I've seen it and I have it. I don't think it would be illegal for me to foward that email with his whack-off video on it and tell him something like, "nice whack-off dude, great form, great finish" or something similar. Maybe, "dude you are brave sending this crap out, especially to a married woman, you miserable POS".
> 
> I don't know what are you guys thoughts? Should I just let it go? I really don't want to, I don't really see the harm in letting him know I have it.


Eh... I wouldn't do it.

I'd probably find a way to contact his wife, though.


----------



## turnera

TXDude said:


> Going for full custody so my attorney advised me to get all the infidelity evidence together. I went back in my WW's secret yahoo account to make sure I got everything that was in there. She used that account to open her secret Skype and Instagram accounts. Well wouldn't you know I missed an email from one of her sexting partners. Attached to the email was a short video clip of him jacking off. LOL Surprisingly I wasn't even upset, didn't start shaking, no trauma!!! I think I'm healing, I'm getting past it. Can't believe I missed it the 1st time I went through it. This guy also sent her a bunch of voice messages, he would record a 10 minute voice message with his phone then save it and send it via email. They had plans to meet up, he wanted her to try a butt plug, he wanted to do some "backdoor loving".
> 
> Anyway, I want to let him know that I've seen him in all his glory. I was thinking about sending it back to him and tell him I will delete it if he sends everything my WW sent to him. But that could lead to legal issues possibly. I still want him to know I've seen it and I have it. I don't think it would be illegal for me to foward that email with his whack-off video on it and tell him something like, "nice whack-off dude, great form, great finish" or something similar. Maybe, "dude you are brave sending this crap out, especially to a married woman, you miserable POS".
> 
> I don't know what are you guys thoughts? Should I just let it go? I really don't want to, I don't really see the harm in letting him know I have it.


IIWY, I would locate either his wife or his parents, and send it to them.


----------



## TXDude

This guy sent her a running watch with a love note. I tracked him down on myfitnesspal found out who he is and then I found him on facebook and sent his wife a copy of the love note. She responded back and said yes that is his handwriting and this is the reason she is leaving him. She told me he was a serial cheater and she is moving out in 2 months. We became friends since and I texted her today about the existence of his jack-off video and asked her if she wanted it. She said no, she didn't need to see it. She told me that he is really pissed that she has a boyfriend. She started dating this new guy back in November and she started bringing their son around him this month. So their son told his dad about the new boyfriend and he came unglued with jealousy. Threatening to cut off her child support. LOL 

That is the consequences of cheating, you will lose your family, your wife will find another man and he will be with your kids. 

Anyway this dude is in his mid 40's so I don't see what sending it to his parents would do, or his brothers and sisters. Also sending it could be illegal, it is porn, it is a video of him whacking his pecker and finishing. 

I do think it would be very embarrassing for him if he knew I had seen it and have it. I don't think I could get in trouble by sending the email he sent with his whack-off video back to him and letting him know I've seen it.


----------



## VladDracul

"_don't know what are you guys thoughts? Should I just let it go? I really don't want to, I don't really see the harm in letting him know I have it._"


Why not go to a site like wifelovers and publish some of her. If I were in his shoes, I wouldn't give a crap and would think its funny that the best you've got to demonstrate your wrath at your old lady ally catting around and shyting all over you, are a few images of me. Sound too "paper tigerish" for my taste. Publish both him and her on the internet and their employers and friends. When you send this out you ain't worried about what good it would do. You're trying to knock their azzez in the dirt. Run with the big dogs or stay on the porch.
Oh, I hate hearing the other wife has a boyfriend. I'z hoping you'd report back that ya'll went for coffee one afternoon and wound up ordering room service the next morning.


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## GusPolinski

TXDude said:


> This guy sent her a running watch with a love note. I tracked him down on myfitnesspal found out who he is and then I found him on facebook and sent his wife a copy of the love note. She responded back and said yes that is his handwriting and this is the reason she is leaving him. She told me he was a serial cheater and she is moving out in 2 months. We became friends since and I texted her today about the existence of his jack-off video and asked her if she wanted it. She said no, she didn't need to see it. She told me that he is really pissed that she has a boyfriend. She started dating this new guy back in November and she started bringing their son around him this month. So their son told his dad about the new boyfriend and he came unglued with jealousy. Threatening to cut off her child support. LOL
> 
> That is the consequences of cheating, you will lose your family, your wife will find another man and he will be with your kids.
> 
> Anyway this dude is in his mid 40's so I don't see what sending it to his parents would do, or his brothers and sisters. Also sending it could be illegal, it is porn, it is a video of him whacking his pecker and finishing.
> 
> I do think it would be very embarrassing for him if he knew I had seen it and have it. I don't think I could get in trouble by sending the email he sent with his whack-off video back to him and letting him know I've seen it.


I doubt that he'd care that you've seen it.

If anything he'd probably start harassing you about it.


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## thenub

Upload the whack off video to a gay porn site with his contact info


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## TX-SC

TXDude said:


> Going for full custody so my attorney advised me to get all the infidelity evidence together. I went back in my WW's secret yahoo account to make sure I got everything that was in there. She used that account to open her secret Skype and Instagram accounts. Well wouldn't you know I missed an email from one of her sexting partners. Attached to the email was a short video clip of him jacking off. LOL Surprisingly I wasn't even upset, didn't start shaking, no trauma!!! I think I'm healing, I'm getting past it. Can't believe I missed it the 1st time I went through it. This guy also sent her a bunch of voice messages, he would record a 10 minute voice message with his phone then save it and send it via email. They had plans to meet up, he wanted her to try a butt plug, he wanted to do some "backdoor loving".
> 
> Anyway, I want to let him know that I've seen him in all his glory. I was thinking about sending it back to him and tell him I will delete it if he sends everything my WW sent to him. But that could lead to legal issues possibly. I still want him to know I've seen it and I have it. I don't think it would be illegal for me to foward that email with his whack-off video on it and tell him something like, "nice whack-off dude, great form, great finish" or something similar. Maybe, "dude you are brave sending this crap out, especially to a married woman, you miserable POS".
> 
> I don't know what are you guys thoughts? Should I just let it go? I really don't want to, I don't really see the harm in letting him know I have it.


If he's into a lot of butt stuff and you tell him how great his "form" was, you might just make a very special type of new friend! 

Sent from my LG-US996 using Tapatalk


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## JohnA

Have you stopped to consider possible FOO or CSA issues I suggested? Your wife's behavior is far outside the norm, why? Yes it matters, her son. The damage could/will be real is the extent of her behavior comes out.


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## TXDude

Yeah, it is bothering me tonight. I feel rage, anger, then I want to cry. I know he just didn't send that whack-off video unsolicited, I remember in her sexting conversation with another man that after he said he "I just had a huge cum explosion" she replied "next time send me a picture so I can see what I did to you". 

20 years together and I never thought for one minute my darling love of my life wife could do this, could be this person. 

Yeah, it is bothering me tonight and I have no one to talk with about it. I don't want to tell a friend because they will spread it to our mutual friends, and I'm uncomfortable talking to my sisters about it. 

I'm glad there is forums like this to come to and unload this crap.


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## turnera

Do you have a sibling or parent you can talk to?

There are always phone call-in places for therapy...


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## Vinnydee

There are husbands that let their wives date and have sex with other guys. They even are OK with their wives having a steady boyfriend. Some husbands just look the other way figuring that they have kids, their wife is happy, a good mother and feels guilty enough to give them more and better sex than before. There is a whole psychological element as to why some guys do this, but they do. 

My wife is bi and we shared her girlfriend who eventually got married to a guy who was into being a cuckold, so she remained our girlfriend for about 25 years of her marriage. She had her own room in our home and went between her two relationships. I also know a few guys who get aroused by having their wife have sex with other men for various reasons too lengthy to list here.

If you do not like what your wife is doing, then do something about it one way or the other. The danger in being a cuckold is that sometimes the wife resents her husband for not being jealous and wanting her to himself like all the husbands of her friends do. Ultimately you decide if you are going to be a cuckold or not. There are wives who want their husbands as their security blanket while they are shopping for a new husband. I have seen this happen with a few married couples who were into that lifestyle. The next move is yours. I would not be able to do what our girlfriend's husband did but some guys can.


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## VladDracul

TXDude said:


> I know he just didn't send that whack-off video unsolicited, I remember in her sexting conversation with another man that after he said he "I just had a huge cum explosion" she replied "next time send me a picture so I can see what I did to you".
> 
> 20 years together and I never thought for one minute my darling love of my life wife could do this, could be this person.


TX my man, are you sure you're not a little intrigued by having a so-called "hot wife"? Sounds to me like she knows how to keep a man, including you, stimulated. Here's a song written by Bobby Lee McDill an old C&W song writer my uncle introduced me to decades ago. Tell me who it describes.


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## sokillme

TXDude said:


> Yeah, it is bothering me tonight. I feel rage, anger, then I want to cry. I know he just didn't send that whack-off video unsolicited, I remember in her sexting conversation with another man that after he said he "I just had a huge cum explosion" she replied "next time send me a picture so I can see what I did to you".
> 
> 20 years together and I never thought for one minute my darling love of my life wife could do this, could be this person.
> 
> Yeah, it is bothering me tonight and I have no one to talk with about it. I don't want to tell a friend because they will spread it to our mutual friends, and I'm uncomfortable talking to my sisters about it.
> 
> I'm glad there is forums like this to come to and unload this crap.


Go one an find another person who isn't so insecure that she need to send out pix to desperate men to get them to tell her how hot she is. We all know there is no shortage of desperate men. It's not like she had to work for it or anything. Your wife has devalued herself not you. You can do better.


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## sokillme

Vinnydee said:


> There are husbands that let their wives date and have sex with other guys. They even are OK with their wives having a steady boyfriend. Some husbands just look the other way figuring that they have kids, their wife is happy, a good mother and feels guilty enough to give them more and better sex than before. There is a whole psychological element as to why some guys do this, but they do.
> 
> My wife is bi and we shared her girlfriend who eventually got married to a guy who was into being a cuckold, so she remained our girlfriend for about 25 years of her marriage. She had her own room in our home and went between her two relationships. I also know a few guys who get aroused by having their wife have sex with other men for various reasons too lengthy to list here.
> 
> If you do not like what your wife is doing, then do something about it one way or the other. The danger in being a cuckold is that sometimes the wife resents her husband for not being jealous and wanting her to himself like all the husbands of her friends do. Ultimately you decide if you are going to be a cuckold or not. There are wives who want their husbands as their security blanket while they are shopping for a new husband. I have seen this happen with a few married couples who were into that lifestyle. The next move is yours. I would not be able to do what our girlfriend's husband did but some guys can.



Ha ha ha, the danger of being a cuckold is you're a cuckold. :rofl:


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## The Middleman

As far as all the videos, and sexting emails, and messages go, follow the advice of your attorney. However, at some juncture in life, everyone in the family, and the spouses of the sexting partners should see the evidence that caused the breakup of a long standing marriage. No one should be under any delusions that your wife is innocent of any wrong doings; they should see the hard facts of what she really is.


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## TDSC60

Since you have made your choice to divorce, you should forget about all the other men. Any woman who is actively looking for other men can eventually find them. Stop focusing on other men. Focus your anger where it belongs - at your wife for doing this to you in the first place. Anger is one step in the grieving process. Eventually you will reach acceptance. Accepting what she has done to you and the marriage and that she is responsible for the consequences of her actions. Accept it and move on.


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## stillthinking

None of these men held a gun to her head and made her cheat. They are like a bacteria. They can only flourish if the environment is favorable. She created that favorable environment. She wanted it. If it was not this guy wacking off on video, it would have been another. 

Where there is a demand, a market will appear to meet that demand.

Keep you anger focused on where it should be.....her.


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## MattMatt

thenub said:


> Upload the whack off video to a gay porn site with his contact info
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


Moderator note:

Suggesting ideas that would get the OP jail time are not as helpful as you might think...


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## thenub

MattMatt said:


> Moderator note:
> 
> 
> 
> Suggesting ideas that would get the OP jail time are not as helpful as you might think...




Sorry. Ban me if you must. 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## TXDude

MattMatt: Don't worry I'm not going to upload the video to a gay site, though the comment did make me laugh. 

stillthinking: Yeah I was pretty naive about the internet. I thought most teenagers engaged in sexting, I guess I was totally wrong. All these social site, myfitnesspal, facebook no name it are full of freaks. There is definitely a market out there for cheaters. 

TDSC60: I made the decision to divorce, I guess I'm mourning the death of my marriage. Angry that she made these decision to destroy our family. I guess I want some revenge on this parasites, they all knew she was married, and most of them are married as well. I was only able to find the identity of one of them, I tried to catfish the others but they are too smart, they don't give out any information that could lead to exposure. I have 1st names and cities and that is it, tried to get where they worked, or other details but they are smart. These married men like sexting with women they meet online, and they don't give out anything that would reveal their identity. I have their usernames on a few sites like myfitnesspal, kik and skype. If anyone reading these wants to try to catfish them so I can expose them to their wives send me a private message I will give you their usernames. 

The Middleman: My WW is begging me not the expose her, this is her quote, "You would do that to the mother of your child?" She is terrified I'm going to do it, I will wait until after the divorce then I will. 

VladDracul: Whatever. Funny song, not my WW. We have been together 20 years and she never ever did anything like this before. It is like she has gone insane, she is in IC trying to figure out why she did it. She swears she has no desire ever to do this again. You are way off base, if she was like this I would have seen it at the beginning. I think she is going through some sort of mid life crisis. She lost all weight and said that she felt invisible to men or some **** like that. Anyway, she is not like what you have said, and I don't ****ing share. 

Vinnydee: So you had your wife's female lover living in your house? Sorry that is not my cup of tea, each to his own, but I'm out on that. More power to ya brother, I like the straight life, raising kids in my house, not a swinger pad. Good luck with that.


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## sokillme

TXDude said:


> Yeah, it is bothering me tonight. I feel rage, anger, then I want to cry. I know he just didn't send that whack-off video unsolicited, I remember in her sexting conversation with another man that after he said he "I just had a huge cum explosion" she replied "next time send me a picture so I can see what I did to you".
> 
> 20 years together and I never thought for one minute my darling love of my life wife could do this, could be this person.
> 
> Yeah, it is bothering me tonight and I have no one to talk with about it. I don't want to tell a friend because they will spread it to our mutual friends, and I'm uncomfortable talking to my sisters about it.
> 
> I'm glad there is forums like this to come to and unload this crap.


Are you "soulhurt" on SI, your stories seem similar. He has a hard drive of stuff she sent but can't get it open. Also divorcing. If you are you get better advice on here. If not you should look him up, exactly the same his wife basically became an cam model to reinforce poor self esteem. Gross.


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## VladDracul

TXDude said:


> VladDracul: Whatever. Funny song, not my WW. We have been together 20 years and she never ever did anything like this before. It is like she has gone insane, she is in IC trying to figure out why she did it. She swears she has no desire ever to do this again. You are way off base, if she was like this I would have seen it at the beginning. I think she is going through some sort of mid life crisis. She lost all weight and said that she felt invisible to men or some **** like that. Anyway, she is not like what you have said, and I don't ****ing share.


Maybe she got hold of some bad moonshine whiskey.


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## MattMatt

thenub said:


> Sorry. Ban me if you must.
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


Ban you? :scratchhead: Why would you expect to be banned?


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## JohnA

FOO or CSA? What was her childhood and teen years like? You keep asking why, I think the answer lies there.


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## alte Dame

I think it's normal to mourn not just the death of your marriage, but the death of your wife as you knew her.

The thing is, we all have different 'stuff' going on inside us that informs how we behave given certain stimuli. Some people rise to greatness when they are in the spotlight. Your WW chose to become a personal porn star for pathetic married guys. This is what makes her feel important; this is inside of her. It probably was always a part of who she is.

She could have lost weight, gotten healthy, and run marathons for worthy causes. She could have met people in venues like that and made herself a star. There are SO many options to shine other than what she has done. But she did what comes naturally. She made herself 'that girl' - the one in high school who thought she was all that because all the boys knew she was a ****. The boys love those girls for the sex, but usually have zero respect for them. They are pathetic to the rest of us.

This is who your WW is, TX. It must be inside of her to be able to express itself the way it has. That's not an aberration. It's a true, abiding character flaw. She needs therapy. I hope you will continue with the D.


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## Rod1987

TXDude said:


> Not my blog. I realized today I'm now a cuckold husband since I'm still together with my cheating wife. That led me to google the topic and I found this article or blog on the topic. It seems that this type of "marriage" is very common. I didn't make the decision for this to happen in my marriage. I was devastated on Dday 1 then Dday2 3 4 5 6, one crisis after another. Now it seems I have surrendered to her infidelity and we have a good relationship as long as we don't discuss her cheating. Great sex nearly every night, compassion and friendship together during the day. However she will go away on her phone for an hour or so pretty much daily and have her online fun with other men. Then we are the happy couple having fantastic sex pleasuring each other, not just one sided sex.


I can understand it. One difference between you and me is that I had mentioned to my wife in the past that I had a desire to see her having sex with other men. She had been reluctant at first, thinking that was just a way for her to approve me fooling around with women. 

Perhaps close to a year went by, 11 months ago, when I discovered she had been having sex with her co-worker for the previous three months while I traveled overnights in my job. She is now 29 years old and a tall, very attractive brunette. I learned about their affair when I had my two days' appointments of the week canceled and arrived home around 2:00 p.m. that day. She didn't arrive until around 10. She confessed and reminded me it had been my idea. She broke off the relationship with the co-worker and we found new guys through personals ads. 

She has now been with several different men she carefully chose from their emails and photos. With two exceptions when she was at their apartments, she has been with them at our home and I watch those couplings. I'm convinced that women in their late 20s, perhaps most in their 30s, need more sex than just one man can give them. It works out for us because I approve and enjoy it, maybe as much as she does. She says she can understand my pleasure from watching her but doesn't really think I get as much as she out of it.


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## TDSC60

TXDude,

Is the divorce final yet?


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## Bibi1031

Rod1987 said:


> I can understand it. One difference between you and me is that I had mentioned to my wife in the past that I had a desire to see her having sex with other men. She had been reluctant at first, thinking that was just a way for her to approve me fooling around with women.
> 
> Perhaps close to a year went by, 11 months ago, when I discovered she had been having sex with her co-worker for the previous three months while I traveled overnights in my job. She is now 29 years old and a tall, very attractive brunette. I learned about their affair when I had my two days' appointments of the week canceled and arrived home around 2:00 p.m. that day. She didn't arrive until around 10. She confessed and reminded me it had been my idea. She broke off the relationship with the co-worker and we found new guys through personals ads.
> 
> She has now been with several different men she carefully chose from their emails and photos. With two exceptions when she was at their apartments, she has been with them at our home and I watch those couplings. I'm convinced that women in their late 20s, perhaps most in their 30s, need more sex than just one man can give them. It works out for us because I approve and enjoy it, maybe as much as she does. She says she can understand my pleasure from watching her but doesn't really think I get as much as she out of it.


It would be best if you start your own thread @Rod1987 instead of thread jacking this one.


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## GusPolinski

Hey mods, can cuckolds get their own subforum?


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## Rod1987

GusPolinski said:


> Hey mods, can cuckolds get their own subforum?


Might be a good idea, Gus. Apparently at least one member here didn't like my remarks. (How did I "thread-jack" this?)


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## Bibi1031

Rod1987 said:


> Might be a good idea, Gus. Apparently at least one member here didn't like my remarks. (How did I "thread-jack" this?)


Not at all. The reason I recommended you posting on your own thread is because I noticed you only had one post and your story deserved its own thread.


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## Youngwife1000

@TXDude 
This situation is horrible, but I'm glad you have found a clear path in moving forward.
My husband did the same to me but actually met up 7 times with people. He also lay next to me in bed sexting others then woke me up to use me to out work his online conversations.
I'm in the middle of not knowing if reconciliation is for sure going to work.
I'm currently just working on myself and trying to get strong.
Reading this thread brings back many painful memories. Your strength did a quick or appears to have done a quick u turn. I still don't know what to do, some days the fear is stabbing and the pain of what's already been done suffocating. Then we can be good for weeks were I think maybe it will be ok. 
Fair play to you,I hope for a swift moving forward for you and your son.
Regards the email, I'd let him know you know, but add no threats.... he'll be more worried with the least information you give.
Best wishes.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## colingrant

Your biggest obstacle might be the sex she's throwing on you. It may be compromising your boundaries. If so, you have to come to terms with that fact before you can expect handling your issues with her. xxssy is powerful.


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## sokillme

@TXDude how are you doing?


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## BadGrammar

I would divorce her. So, good sex is what seems to keep you from escaping this humiliation? Well then, be assured that functional female genitalia need not be attached to a sadist.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## SunCMars

MattMatt said:


> Ban you? :scratchhead: Why would you expect to be banned?


Now, Tut tut.

The poor boy, he fears.
The poor boy fears your corivals across the Irish Strait.

He knows, he knows.
He knows that some that have moved, deserted their Eire, left it behind. 
Left their Eire, yet they still hold a grudge.

They now reside in your Devon, and your Devonshires.
I bring this to light in my oft, not wise, limerick conspires.

To be banned in England is an easy endeavor. Aye, that it is.
Just speak your mind, rattle your neighbor, let the belly's beverage fizz.

But, this, my Welsh brother is Nay that he fears. 
It is the Eire, the brogue from the Rogue whose roots lay due West, headlong across the Strait.
Across that channel where words, simple words gets a-twisted. Aye, they do.

To be banned in England is to drum-band a bounder, kept at a distance.
When a Limerick-man slurs said ban, it gets tongue twisted to bin, in this instance.

To be binned in Limerick, is.... 'Ite' shaids wurser'.
It is to be banned to no Aeire, Eirey spot, it is buried, um, twenty-four hands deep, and that's minus the cursor.

And that Good Sir, is why he fears the ban of an Englishman. One, whose roots, he knows not.

Just Sayin'

_SCM from the African plain.
Transcribed and presented by The Typist.
The Spock Puppet._


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## SunCMars

On being a Cuckhold, I cannot be.
I can live as two, but never three.

''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''



ulyssesheart said:


> Naw, he is not a ****. He cannot have an O with these thoughts dancing naked in his head!
> 
> She is a piece of work. A piece of wack.


Oh, my God!
On this post...revisit.

This man, this poster, causes chills to run up and down me legs.
I think of him, then, I remember, my brother be gone.

Sprung and flung to outer Space.
Floating, adrift, blue in the face. 

His silver lifeline cut by one so cruel.
No motion, no thoughts, SHE cut off his fuel.
.................................................................................................................
This, done by a women, I left in a former life, left as a young widow; my bones left in some shallow grave on a battlefield forgotten.
But forgotten never by her. It was @EleGirl, that I left in disarray. My head bludgeoned to death by a rifle butt, her heart left to beat, alone, for forty-four and a day...years.
She knows not these facts, though I once told her. She holds a grudge from two generations..... gone in the past.
Cannot know, it seems, though I have told her so.
So sad, this be.
..................................................................................................................
On Ulyssesheart:

But, all in the end did work out, the man, the lesser god got reprieve.
Jason and his Argonauts his body did retrieve.

To a place that women cannot breathe, cannot survive.
The air is purified and can only be gulped and taken in by an appendage that swings to and fro.
Not by a pocket rocket, a soft silky sleeve, this, it cannot contrive.


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## SunCMars

Bibi1031 said:


> It would be best if you start your own thread @Rod1987 instead of thread jacking this one.


Ah, Bibi, Dear..

I see some prurient interest, a little drop, flowing out of your left eye.

Aye, Yai, Yai.


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## leon2100

kinda like a guy who watches porn to get turned on for the wife... so what's the problem?.


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## SunCMars

On this, oh, please.
I did not revive this post, this, not-so-long-ago, tease.

I too, not a Ban fear, the shame that this doing doust fan.
But a Bin, this, I fear, coming from Eire, eire, anger, from a Limerick-man.

Put simply for California, Berkley-men.
Ban, do not Bin.


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## Sports Fan

Don't celebrate your new found sex life for too long. It has been overwhelmingly proven that when cheaters first cheat on their spouse they increase the sex they have with them out of guilt. This new found Sex on Tap will be short lived though. Eventually your wife will only want to have sex with her affair partner and you will be a cuckhold left out in the cold. 

Man up and take action now regarding her foul behaviour.


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