# Mixed feelings about wife and co-worker



## Malky1954 (Jul 11, 2011)

Long story - I'll try and keep it short - can explain more if necessary.

Firstly my wife is more than 12 years younger than me and we have both been married before - this time for fifteen years.

A month or so ago she went to a conference with her work. Four days over the weekend - Friday to Monday. When she got back she told me that there had been a mix up with the accommodation and that she had ended up sharing a twin room with a male co-worker from another branch - he about ten years younger than her - but, she said "nothing happened".

I was surprised at my reaction. Sort of both angry but also aroused. We had good sex that night.

Over the next few days I quizzed her further. "What did she wear to sleep?" (we sleep naked at home). Her underwear. "Did she take off her bra?" Yes. "What did he sleep in?" His boxers. "Where did they dress?" Mostly in the bathroom. "Mostly?" And so on.

Each day (and night) my questioning revealed a little more detail and, to be honest, the hornier I got and the better the sex was between us. My wife couldn't fail to notice the effect each extra bit of salicious detail was having on me. "It turns you on to think of me in such an intimate situation with another guy, doesn't it?" I had to admit that it did.

She still insists that "nothing happened" but with each additional bit of detail the definition of nothing is narrowing.

I'm no longer sure that what she is telling me is true or whether she is spicing it up for effect (she swears she would only tell me the truth). Either way it is working. For example, "Did he see your naked breasts?" Yes.

I'm not sure what all this means about me and our marriage. Am I pervert? Is she? The sex between us is great, but surely it cannot last and there is a risk it all ends in tears.

Any advice? Anyone have similar experiences?

Thanks.


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## ClipClop (Apr 28, 2011)

She cheated on you and you are so turned on you believe nothing happened. Shows how an aroused man can't think straight.

No business would condone their behavior. 

Did she actually have a reservation? A weekend business trip. Could be. What alleged business was this? Can she prove it?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

ClipClop said:


> She cheated on you and you are so turned on you believe nothing happened. Shows how an aroused man can't think straight.
> 
> No business would condone their behavior.
> 
> ...


If she was cheating on him, she didn't need to tell him the story! 

Common sense! 

A cheating person wouldn't go home and tell her man what happened!


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## ClipClop (Apr 28, 2011)

Are you kidding me? This was preemptive because he could have found out another way.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

Malky1954 said:


> Long story - I'll try and keep it short - can explain more if necessary.
> 
> Firstly my wife is more than 12 years younger than me and we have both been married before - this time for fifteen years.
> 
> ...


My husband would be aroused too! 

Men are interesting! 

I think it tells me that men are less jealous than women. I guarantee the male co-worker's girl friend or wife will have a totally different reaction, screaming or yelling I am sure! 

Just view it as a fantasy, if it turns you on, then it turns you on!


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## ClipClop (Apr 28, 2011)

I am really surprised that you can blow off the obvious red flags. You'd tolerate this from your h?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

ClipClop said:


> I am really surprised that you can blow off the obvious red flags. You'd tolerate this from your h?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


It's not my business to make an assumption if she is cheating or not! 

If she is cheating, then she is good at cheating. She actually goes home and tells her husband what happened! I don't know how many people would be this smart! 

I am a woman, I don't find it amusing if my husband shares a room with another woman. But the OP finds it arousing, it's not surprising for me to know. He is a MAN!


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## morituri (Apr 1, 2011)

Before her business trip, did you share any cuckold fantasies with her?


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## Malky1954 (Jul 11, 2011)

morituri said:


> Before her business trip, did you share any cuckold fantasies with her?


Not as such. We've always been open about our previous sexual experiences and commented honestly on the attractiveness (or otherwise) of other people - but never suggested that either of us might have sex with another.


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## Malky1954 (Jul 11, 2011)

greenpearl said:


> My husband would be aroused too!
> 
> Men are interesting!
> 
> ...


Thanks, Greenpearl.

Thing is I'm not sure how much is fantasy and how much is true - or how much I want to be fantasy and how much I want to be true!


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## e.p. (Jun 10, 2011)

Malky1954 said:


> A month or so ago she went to a conference with her work. Four days over the weekend - Friday to Monday. When she got back she told me that there had been a mix up with the accommodation and that she had ended up sharing a twin room with a male co-worker from another branch - he about ten years younger than her - but, she said "nothing happened".


I'm not going to say she cheated on you but this just does not happen; either she is lying (she slept in the same room as the guy on her own or is making the whole thing up) or the company she worked for acted unethically.

I am a man and I travel several times a year with the same group of men to conduct tests at remote facilities. If there is difficulty booking enough rooms we get spread across multiple hotels even though that means more rental cars and money spent. Even thought it wouldn't be an issue with the group of people I travel with, we have never been asked to share a room.

You should follow up with her company as I would view this as an impropriety. Also, does she file for reimbursements for travel? If so, is she claiming a hotel room?

-e.p.


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

Malky1954 said:


> Thanks, Greenpearl.
> 
> Thing is I'm not sure how much is fantasy and how much is true - or how much I want to be fantasy and how much I want to be true!


I wouldn't go any further! 

I still believe in one man one woman marriage. 

Some people try threesome, some people try swinging. I know I can't do it! I don't want to make my life complicated! That kind of excitement doesn't last!


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## morituri (Apr 1, 2011)

Have the two of you talked about an 'open marriage'?


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## Malky1954 (Jul 11, 2011)

greenpearl said:


> I wouldn't go any further!
> 
> I still believe in one man one woman marriage.
> 
> Some people try threesome, some people try swinging. I know I can't do it! I don't want to make my life complicated! That kind of excitement doesn't last!


I don't want her to have had sex with him (and she assures me she didn't) or with anyone else. But the flirting/exhibitionism/voyeurism bit turns me on. For example she says she saw him in his boxers with his 'morning wood' and that he was in the room when she put on her stockings. I'm arroused just telling you about it!


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## morituri (Apr 1, 2011)

Malky1954 said:


> I don't want her to have had sex with him (and she assures me she didn't) or with anyone else. But the flirting/exhibitionism/voyeurism bit turns me on. For example she says she saw him in his boxers with his 'morning wood' and that he was in the room when she put on her stockings. I'm arroused just telling you about it!


Just make sure you inform her that the next time she goes on another business trip that she first checks the hotel reservations before going. A company can get into a lot of legal trouble for not checking up on this kind of mistake, especially if a woman gets raped by a fellow co-worker.


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

Malky1954 said:


> I don't want her to have had sex with him (and she assures me she didn't) or with anyone else. But the flirting/exhibitionism/voyeurism bit turns me on. For example she says she saw him in his boxers with his 'morning wood' and that he was in the room when she put on her stockings. I'm arroused just telling you about it!


Obviously men are different from women here! 

My husband gets turned on when I tell him my past experience with men! He keeps on asking for more details! 

I don't get turned on by his experience with women in the past. He should be glad that I don't get furious!


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## PHTlump (Jun 2, 2010)

Your wife had sex with another man. On the bright side, that doesn't seem to be a problem for you. Win, win.


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## sigma1299 (May 26, 2011)

If my wife was in any room - let alone a room with a bed in it - with another man and he saw my wife's breast and/or she saw him with a hard on I would go [email protected] crazy!!! But I have less than zero desire to see, hear or imagine my wife with another man. Had that been me I'd have come unglued on her for not just getting her own hotel room and worry about reimbursement later, I'd have come unglued on her company for putting her in the situation, and I'd have come unglued on the guy for not being a gentleman and giving the lady the room and not putting her or him that situation to begin with.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

Personally, I don't buy the story. I think your wife is trickling out the truth, breaking it to you slowly. And it's working. 

As far as it turning you on, there's quite a few people who might be turned on by that. Maybe your wife suspected you would be one of them, who knows. But you're not a pervert or anything, in my books.

The potential issue I see is that your wife is willing/wanting to push the boundaries in your relationship without even discussing them first (apparently). The obvious issue is that there's a big risk that she'll eventually get to the point that it ISN'T fun/arousing for you, and everything will blow up.

C


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## morituri (Apr 1, 2011)

PBear said:


> Personally, *I don't buy the story. I think your wife is trickling out the truth, breaking it to you slowly.* And it's working.
> 
> As far as it turning you on, there's quite a few people who might be turned on by that. Maybe your wife suspected you would be one of them, who knows. But you're not a pervert or anything, in my books.
> 
> ...


I don't buy her story either. The fact that you are here on this forum with a thread titled "Mixed feelings about wife and co-worker" obviously shows that you have serious doubts that she is telling you the whole story about her trip.

If you can afford it, hire a P.I. If you can't then start doing some investigation of your own. If she comes in late one evening, check her panties or thongs for traces of semen or better yet, send a pair to a lab to test for evidence of semen. If she's having extra-marital sex then you must know ASAP. Your wife might be playing Russian roulette not only with her life but your life as well.

The last thing faithful wives want is to lose their husbands trust and would never allow themselves to be put in such a position that your wife described to you. You have some serious investigative work to do here.


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## Closer (Jul 15, 2011)

I can see the possibility that nothing happened. It seems that she knows that you get turned on by the story so she's continuing it.


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## Malky1954 (Jul 11, 2011)

greenpearl said:


> Obviously men are different from women here!
> 
> My husband gets turned on when I tell him my past experience with men! He keeps on asking for more details!
> 
> I don't get turned on by his experience with women in the past. He should be glad that I don't get furious!


Thanks again, Greenpearl.

Are you ever tempted to spice up the stories of your past experience for your H's benefit? Is that what my W is doing for me?


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

Malky1954 said:


> Thanks again, Greenpearl.
> 
> Are you ever tempted to spice up the stories of your past experience for your H's benefit? Is that what my W is doing for me?


I just give my husband the details he asks for! 

I don't add anything or make up any stories. 

What we talk about is what happened before we met each other, he is intrigued by my past, my past excites him. 

I read your post to my husband last night, and asked him if he would have the same kind of reaction like you did if I were in a similar situation, he said YES. I am not surprised. 

But I won't make up any stories to get my husband excited! I am not good at lying! I am not creative either!


Are you suspicious that your wife is cheating on you?


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

One time my husband was almost put into a same room with a woman because my husband's name can also be a girl's name. 

Does your wife know this co-worker? Or he is just from a different branch and they have never met before? My husband said that it's unlikely for two strangers to jump into bed together at a situation like this.


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## Stonewall (Jul 5, 2011)

I get it. Hes digging the fantasy/visual side of it but if it crosses into reality.....watch out there will be a problem!


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## Tourchwood (Feb 1, 2011)

If I put in a room with a woman and share the same bed for couple hours only, believe me I will be ding dong all over her. 
if she did share the room then she was physical


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## Malky1954 (Jul 11, 2011)

Tourchwood said:


> If I put in a room with a woman and share the same bed for couple hours only, believe me I will be ding dong all over her.
> if she did share the room then she was physical


There were two separate beds.


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## Malky1954 (Jul 11, 2011)

greenpearl said:


> One time my husband was almost put into a same room with a woman because my husband's name can also be a girl's name.
> 
> Does your wife know this co-worker? Or he is just from a different branch and they have never met before? My husband said that it's unlikely for two strangers to jump into bed together at a situation like this.


She met him before a couple of times over a few years, but didn't know him any better than any other colleague from another branch.


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

e.p. said:


> I'm not going to say she cheated on you but *this just does not happen; *either she is lying (she slept in the same room as the guy on her own or is making the whole thing up) or the company she worked for acted unethically.
> 
> I am a man and I travel several times a year with the same group of men to conduct tests at remote facilities. If there is difficulty booking enough rooms we get spread across multiple hotels even though that means more rental cars and money spent. Even thought it wouldn't be an issue with the group of people I travel with, we have never been asked to share a room.
> 
> ...


This does not just happen. 

I have no idea what company this would be. I work for a fortune 100 company and have worked for others a well. I have never had to share a room with another man even. But I suppose with some smaller companies that could happen. Idunno. 

Anyway, to avoid even the appearance of anything I will not visit a woman's room alone. I sure would not invite a woman into my room for the same reasons. In some cases companies have suites where they entertain or do actual working sessions. There is just no leaving a man and a woman alone in a hotel room for more than a few minutes. If we wish to chat we would meet downstairs in the lounge or bar areas.


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

sigma1299 said:


> If my wife was in any room - let alone a room with a bed in it - with another man and he saw my wife's breast and/or she saw him with a hard on I would go [email protected] crazy!!! But I have less than zero desire to see, hear or imagine my wife with another man. Had that been me I'd have come unglued on her for not just getting her own hotel room and worry about reimbursement later, I'd have come unglued on her company for putting her in the situation, and I'd have come unglued on the guy for not being a gentleman and giving the lady the room and not putting her or him that situation to begin with.


Absolutely. My wife would not have gone along with anything so crazy. This is absurd. I highly doubt this actually happened. What married woman would go along with this unless she wanted to be alone with this guy or was acting out a fantasy for her husband.

I would not have gone along with it either.


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## Therealbrighteyes (Feb 11, 2010)

Entropy3000 said:


> Absolutely. My wife would not have gone alone with anything so crazy. This is absurd. I highly doubt this actually happened. What married woman would go along with this unless she wanted to be alone with this guy or was acting out a fantasy for her husband.
> 
> I would not have gone along with it either.


This sounds more along the lines of "Dear Penthouse Forum". My bs meter is pretty high on this one and I'm not talking the wife.


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

therealbrighteyes said:


> this sounds more along the lines of "dear penthouse forum". My bs meter is pretty high on this one and i'm not talking the wife.


yes


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## Therealbrighteyes (Feb 11, 2010)

Entropy3000 said:


> yes


BTW....he talks about his wife's "room mate" sporting morning wood. I always thought that would be an excellent name for a manor. Morning Wood Manor. How fabulous. Imagine what the lawn jockeys would look like. 

Now back to our regularly scheduled program. So there I was relaxing in the hot tub when suddenly out of the blue 3 Nordic blondes scaled the back fence, insisted on taking off their clothes and climbed in.........


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

Therealbrighteyes said:


> BTW....he talks about his wife's "room mate" sporting morning wood. I always thought that would be an excellent name for a manor. Morning Wood Manor. How fabulous. Imagine what the lawn jockeys would look like.
> 
> Now back to our regularly scheduled program. So there I was relaxing in the hot tub when suddenly out of the blue 3 Nordic blondes scaled the back fence, insisted on taking off their clothes and climbed in.........


:rofl:


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## piqued (Mar 25, 2010)

I read the first page and 1/2 of this thread so I don't know if anything has changed after that, but this is VERY fishy. There is just not a company in the world that would expose itself legally making/forcing two co-workers from different divisions (IOW, they don't know each other) room together ESPECIALLY if one is a female. It just flat out would not happen. She may be telling you what "happened' during their time together, but she isn't telling you the truth as to how this arrangement came to be. Like I said, not a company in this country would make a man and woman that do not know each other share a room. Something is going on that you haven't been told yet.


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

greenpearl said:


> It's not my business to make an assumption if she is cheating or not!
> 
> If she is cheating, then she is good at cheating. She actually goes home and tells her husband what happened! I don't know how many people would be this smart!
> 
> I am a woman, I don't find it amusing if my husband shares a room with another woman. But the OP finds it arousing, it's not surprising for me to know. He is a MAN!


I am a man and would not find this sexually arousing at all. I would be very aroused but in a very different way. I would be full of the EXTREMELY PISSED OFF hormone.


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

greenpearl said:


> My husband would be aroused too!
> 
> Men are interesting!
> 
> ...


No. Men can be very jealous. Men are wired by Sperm Competition to be sexually aroused if they think their mate has been with another man. The urge is for the man to then supply his sperm in competition with the other males.

As the link states some sperm are for defensive purposes and others are for ensuring his sperm "wins". There is actually a numbder of days that sperm survive. So a man who has intercourse with his mate more often than every five days is more assurred that his sperm is available to help ensure his lineage. Longer than five days he has no live sperm left to ... compete.

So men are wired to c0ckblock by acting on the gut feelings of jealousy to prevent another male from imprenating his mate. That is why folks should listen to their gut feelings in these matters and not just dismiss them without further investigation. Often the gut feeling is dead on.

So all this is very clinical but it is at the heart of men being aroused by behavior of the female that would seem counter-intuitive. Kinda why some men on this forum have no problem with their SOs interacting with other men and coming home and making love to them. Actually it is more likely raw pounding sex as this is a very primal thing. They get a hormonal kick out of the fact that just maybe their woman is carrying another man's sperm. They probably have no conscious idea that is why they are aroused. They just know they are very horny and she is all aroused as well. Ignorance is bliss I guess.

So yeah men have their way of being jealous.


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## Therealbrighteyes (Feb 11, 2010)

Ent,
Damn....take a pill. You do know this post isn't real....right? Yes, yes, we all know why the penis is shaped the way it is. 
This poster is just inciting and he apparently did a damn good job.


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

Therealbrighteyes said:


> Ent,
> Damn....take a pill. You do know this post isn't real....right? Yes, yes, we all know why the penis is shaped the way it is.
> This poster is just inciting and he apparently did a damn good job.


I have not had the need to take Viagra yet. I hope that is many years away. Yes his situation is totally absurd. This seemed to be a learning moment as it pertained to the comment about jealousy.

Why don't you explain to the good folks here why the penis is shaped in this manner?

LOL. 

So now that I have myself all worked up thinking about raw pounding primal sex .... I need to check to see if my wife is done playing with the family ancestry website.


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## MakinOurWay (Jul 12, 2011)

I doubt the company is a start up, or a mom and pop outfit... because according to the story the accommodations were made for groups from different branches. Branches suggest a certain level of corporate sophistication, and that would likely entail a legal division and HR division... meaning this slip up would cost the HR/travel coordinator his/her job, and open the company up to a lawsuit. A phone call to corporate HR could remedy this. The hotel staff would CERTAINLY remedy this.

The conference ran over the weekend? Highly doubtful. Such expense and such an imposition. It's just extremely rare.

A colleague allowed his awkwardly sudden female roommate to see his erection? In what world would anyone allow this to happen?? "Good morning. This rooming situation sure is weird, Mrs. Brown. Oops, look! There is my erection! Yeah, I'm just going to get up from my bed here, walk in front of you with my boner bouncing out there in its tent... and then get into the shower. Enjoy the show, Mrs. Brown, oh, and when will you need the Frederickson files?"

And the unlikeliest circumstance by far is that she put on hose and he saw.
1. She's working a conference and elects to wear panty hose? Fine, I'll buy it as plausible, however incredibly unlikely in these times. He'd have been in the room as she pulls hose up her legs and over her underwear, before she put on her skirt... or she's got her skirt on already and has to hike it up to get her hose situated. There is no circumstance in which this occurred and he watched.
2. She's wearing thigh high hose and she just rolled them up her legs and attached them to her garter belt? It's so letters to penthouse it's not funny. Wife, conference, thigh highs, naughty encounters, etc... this is a fantasy.


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## morituri (Apr 1, 2011)

MakinOurWay said:


> I doubt the company is a start up, or a mom and pop outfit... because according to the story the accommodations were made for groups from different branches. Branches suggest a certain level of corporate sophistication, and that would likely entail a legal division and HR division... meaning this slip up would cost the HR/travel coordinator his/her job, and open the company up to a lawsuit. A phone call to corporate HR could remedy this. The hotel staff would CERTAINLY remedy this.


Indeed.

It's either a bogus story perpetrated by his wife or by the OP. But in case it is not, he needs to investigate further because no faithful wife - or even unfaithful wife - would even consider relating such a story to her husband considering the most likely reactions of rage, heartbreak, and violence that would result from it.


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## Malky1954 (Jul 11, 2011)

The overbooking was the hotel's mistake not the company. The event was not a company event (although they were there on business) - would you call it a convention? - the precise meaning may be lost in transatlantic translation. They agreed to share (after some debate my wife tells me) rather than be booked out to another hotel, so no one is liable except them.

Is it true? I believe some of it is. The knowing/not knowing is part of the turn on (which confuses me even more).


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## Cara (Aug 15, 2010)

Malky1954 said:


> The overbooking was the hotel's mistake not the company. The event was not a company event (although they were there on business) - would you call it a convention? - the precise meaning may be lost in transatlantic translation. They agreed to share (after some debate my wife tells me) rather than be booked out to another hotel, so no one is liable except them.
> 
> Is it true? I believe some of it is. The knowing/not knowing is part of the turn on (which confuses me even more).


OK, now I _know_ this is fiction. :rofl:


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## Tourchwood (Feb 1, 2011)

Man you remind me with Movie Chloe. 
when Julianne Moore is aroused by imagining or hearing her husbands infidelity.


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## ClipClop (Apr 28, 2011)

What I find odd is that you don't seem to,care that she cheated on you. Why don't you care? Your **** overrides your heart, commitment to your marriage and your brain? 

She cheated. If you'd stop thinking about your sexual response you might be able to save your marriage. All you are doing now is to encourage her to do it again.

You should be looking for evidence, not worrying about being turned on. Or, maybe you want to lose your marriage. You aren't very serious about it. I would call it immature.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Tourchwood (Feb 1, 2011)

I agree with ClipClop
Stop ***Monkey, think about your marriage.


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## michzz (Jun 6, 2008)

:iagree::iagree:

This post is totally fabricated. And not really that well executed for that matter.



Therealbrighteyes said:


> Ent,
> Damn....take a pill. You do know this post isn't real....right? Yes, yes, we all know why the penis is shaped the way it is.
> This poster is just inciting and he apparently did a damn good job.


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## ClipClop (Apr 28, 2011)

All that matters is she came home to him? ****, most ppl go home to h or w after ****ing someone else the first many times, some for years.

This entire thread is lunacy.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## golfergirl (Dec 8, 2010)

ClipClop said:


> All that matters is she came home to him? ****, most ppl go home to h or w after ****ing someone else the first many times, some for years.
> 
> This entire thread is lunacy.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_



He's being incredibly sarcastic. He's the most respectful, proper partner - not his character.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

Malky,

Was this a well-known hotel chain or franchise where this meeting was taking place?


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## tjohnson (Mar 10, 2010)

I am not sure if you are making up the stories or if your wife is.


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## ClipClop (Apr 28, 2011)

If anyone is making it up, it is incredibly boring.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Chris H. (Jan 27, 2007)

I think you guys are being too hard on this guy. I think his story is legit, and he is honestly posting because he's not sure how to take it. Call me gullible.


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## FieryHairedLady (Mar 24, 2011)

Therealbrighteyes said:


> This sounds more along the lines of "Dear Penthouse Forum". My bs meter is pretty high on this one and I'm not talking the wife.


I got the same vibe. LOL


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## Therealbrighteyes (Feb 11, 2010)

Alright, giving him the benefit of the doubt, where is the issue? She cheated, he is turned on by it. What's the problem?


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