# How direct can a woman be?



## LivingAndLearning (Jun 17, 2014)

Guys, would you find it unattractive if a woman you have known for a very short time just tells you straight up how she feels about you?

Also, is it a myth that ment don't like to be pursued?


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## Betrayedone (Jan 1, 2014)

I would love that level of honesty. That's how I do it towards women, too. They either find it refreshing or a turnoff. I don't care. I am who I am.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

It depends... If she told me I was a dweeb, I'd probably find that unattractive, yes. If she told me she wanted to rock my world and blow my "mind" (and she was a hottie), I'd find that very attractive. 

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Jetranger (May 31, 2013)

I would say let me know and make it clear you’re serious, but then don’t keep pushing me and reminding me constantly as that would make me worried about what you’d be like in a relationship or if the relationship ever ended.


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## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

Nope I love an honest and upfront woman. I hate having to guess where I stand


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## Sunburn (Jul 9, 2012)

Not at all and sooner the better cause I'm an investment broker by trade and time is money!


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## murphy5 (May 1, 2014)

PBear said:


> It depends... If she told me I was a dweeb, I'd probably find that unattractive, yes. If she told me she wanted to rock my world and blow my "mind" (and she was a hottie), I'd find that very attractive.
> 
> C
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


:rofl:
yeah I would only want to hear the good stuff.


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## over20 (Nov 15, 2013)

LivingAndLearning said:


> Guys, would you find it unattractive if a woman you have known for a very short time just tells you straight up how she feels about you?
> 
> Also, is it a myth that ment don't like to be pursued?


I don't think so. I think that is a sign of maturity that she WONT play mind games with the male she is interested in......I have been out of the dating game for a long time, as I am married, but hubs and I DO play around......and yes he loves to be pursued..


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

LivingAndLearning said:


> Guys, would you find it unattractive if a woman you have known for a very short time just tells you straight up how she feels about you?
> 
> Also, is it a myth that ment don't like to be pursued?


My Husband is the type that would NOT be turned off by this.. but of course it would be awkward if he was not into her.. his 2nd GF (before me) pursued him, there was another but he didn't like her..

And he married me - I am more forthcoming than most women I personally know, I don't mind confrontation...I say it like it is..... Mind games.. Never played them.. if someone even tried to mess with me like that...I'd open the subject up, speak how I feel ...question how they feel, what is going on.. if I didn't trust the answers, our relationship would wither & die.. I can handle hard truths but not BS... 

Just wouldn't have the patience for it.. 

Yet.. I'm old fashioned minded and for myself.. I would NEVER chase a man.. be friendly.. Yes... but if he didn't show me *his intentions 1st*.. I'd assume he was NOT into me...I *want *the man to come on to me.. I've always felt very strongly about this.. or it all falls apart for me... I'd have to get over anyone I had a crush on if he didn't go there..to me, that means I didn't do it for him, he was not interested ENOUGH.. and yeah, I want to be able to blow the guy away. 

Husband did that, thankfully.. or nothing would have happened between us.. just remained friends likely till someone else came along and shown how they felt ...


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## jorgegene (May 26, 2012)

It depends on what a 'short time' is.

If you get 'I love you' or 'lets get married' withing a few weeks, its creepy and superficial.

I've always let the women in my life say the first 'I love you'.
Why? Because I tell them love must be tested by trials before it can be real love.

Not too many years ago I dated a gal 17 years my junior and she went around singing "he love me, he wants to marry me". She would ask me if I love her and I would say "not yet, but I like you a lot" and later "I'm learning to love you".

My present wife started to tell me she 'I love you' after about a month and a half. I told her I'm not quite ready, that we have to go through some trials. Well we did, and we're married and I can say unequivocally 'I love you'.

But to answer the original question. Yes, I want a woman to be direct. There's way too much game playing out there.
Every woman I've ever been with except my present wife played games.

My present wife doesn't know how to play games.

After 2.1/2 years I know this, because she's never played a game so far.


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## Emerald (Aug 2, 2012)

When my husband was single he LOVED to be approached by women & while dating wanted them to be honest if they decided "they were just not into him."


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## LivingAndLearning (Jun 17, 2014)

Thanks for your opinions all  That's given me the ecouragement to speak up and tell somone how I feel about them!

It's definately a NOT declaration of love! More a case of met someone, there's a strong physical attraction and we seem to share a lot of the same interests and values.

All I really want to do it tell him I think he's a great guy and suggest we spend a little time together to see whether we get along/it might go somewhere.

I know he was screwede over in his previous relationship so I suspect he's i nterested but just a little shy/cautious.

Nothing ventured, nothing gained!


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## Almostrecovered (Jul 14, 2011)

sorry L&L, I know I'm awesome but I'm married


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## DoF (Mar 27, 2014)

I can always appreciate honesty, even if it hurts.


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## xakulax (Feb 9, 2014)

over20 said:


> I don't think so. I think that is a sign of maturity that she WONT play mind games with the male she is interested in......




:iagree::iagree::iagree:


I can't agree more


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## Mostlycontent (Apr 16, 2014)

LivingAndLearning said:


> Thanks for your opinions all  That's given me the ecouragement to speak up and tell somone how I feel about them!
> 
> It's definately a NOT declaration of love! More a case of met someone, there's a strong physical attraction and we seem to share a lot of the same interests and values.
> 
> ...


Like several others have stated, I prefer to know where I stand and not have to guess at it so I prefer a direct women.

Here's the thing, whether we are aware of it or not, we all have a subconscious checklist when looking for a mate. Obviously, we have a conscious one too but that little thing in your gut that says "full speed ahead" is usually your subconscious checklist with a lot of boxes checked on it.

It's helpful to know within the first few months of a relationship if the person you're dating also has a lot of checked boxes.

Once you've got a lot of checked boxes on the list, you allow yourself to get more invested and head towards the "falling in love" part of the relationship. We all go at different speeds. I'm incredibly decisive so I can get there perhaps quicker than others. It's just a matter of truly "qualifying" people.

My W and I got married 6 months to the day after we met so obviously, we both realized that we had a lot of boxes on our subconscious checklist marked and proceeded accordingly and rather quickly.

I'm particularly pragmatic and figured that I wasn't likely to do better so I closed the deal.


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## Thundarr (Jul 4, 2012)

LivingAndLearning said:


> Guys, would you find it unattractive if a woman you have known for a very short time just tells you straight up how she feels about you?
> 
> Also, is it a myth that ment don't like to be pursued?


I think you have to do that for sometimes. We (guys) aren't always good at reading signals.


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## waylan (Apr 23, 2014)

Thundarr said:


> I think you have to do that for sometimes. We (guys) aren't always good at reading signals.


Agree 100% Us men can be pretty dense at times. I love a women that knows what she wants isn't afraid to express it.....


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