# Month and a half and counting...



## baissier (Jun 21, 2009)

Usually how long does separation drag on... I am so tired. Tired of even thinking about her. Every morning waking up from another dream of still being with her. 

There is no contact anymore. Whenever I go back to the house, I really hope she will not come home early for whatever reason and run into me. Don't want to see her emotionless face.

Can't fall asleep every night. Seems like working out is the only thing that can keep my life moving. As soon as the adrenaline wear off, it feels miserable again. So silly to focus on losing 20 lbs...5 more to go to reach 135lb. So what if I reach the target?

wouldn't it be nice without a family so I can do whatever I want without considering others...so sick of this


----------



## ls878 (Jul 2, 2009)

who initiated separation? it sounds like you just want a divorce. is there someone else? you say no contact, so counseling was never an option i take it? do you have support from friends? 

try and focus on you. hobbies, friends, etc. find out what you really want out of life and go there. 

my husband is leaving and the last thing i want to do is mope around the house. i want to be free and find myself again. i will definitely miss him, but i'm excited to get started in a small weird way.

i wish you the best


----------



## Lostman (May 23, 2009)

Seperations can last a long while. So I agree with other post concentrate on yourself. 

My stbxw and I have been seperated for about 2 months now. I asked her where we stood about a month, we both agreed that marriage wasn't savable. So I proceeded to move forward. Actually met someone new. To early yada yada. There was a lot of love lost in my marriage over the yrs. 
So do what you need to do and move forward, either way. If there is considerations for reconcilation the go that direction, if not then go forward from there. Hardest thing to do is letting go. 
So hang in there and remember do what you feel is right for you.


----------



## baissier (Jun 21, 2009)

another dream of her..is this never going to end

in the dream, i was offered a pill to forget about her. i took it and then woke up....Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind...then sitting in my bed. I remembered the movie. Liked the movie back then but loving it more now.

feeling bad for my dog who is by himself most of the time. wish i can take it with me instead of just going over to walk him. 

how can people change so suddenly...how she acts feel like a total stranger to me. is she cheating or is it just depression. i need to let my mind go


----------



## overitnolove (Dec 5, 2008)

I think that dream is telling you that the only way to stop dreaming about her is to deal with your waking life.

Getting your dog to be with you will be great for you. Can you do that? What iI mean is, can a dog be there where you are? That's the only consideration. You need the conpanionship.

Stay busy and see a shrink. Stay busy otherwise you will fall over emotionally and it is really hard to get up from that, I know!


----------



## Dark Angel (Jun 17, 2009)

Make list of things that you want to do and start tackling them one by one. eventually your own momentum will carry you forward.

Her being that distant is a bit of a question mark. Could she just be putting on a front? I thought thats what my wife was doing till I caught her with another guy. I never thought her capable either.

Keep your eyes open and listen to your gut.


----------



## voivod (Aug 7, 2008)

baissier said:


> Usually how long does separation drag on... I am so tired. Tired of even thinking about her. Every morning waking up from another dream of still being with her.
> 
> There is no contact anymore. Whenever I go back to the house, I really hope she will not come home early for whatever reason and run into me. Don't want to see her emotionless face.
> 
> ...


in a way, i think you're asking this:

how long is this going to go on?

a smart man once responded to me this way, when i asked that question of my separation. he said:

"why, do you have somewhere to be?"

that's the answer.

keep living an honorable life.

daily.

good luck and, truly, Godspeed.


----------



## Dark Angel (Jun 17, 2009)

:iagree:

Great Post.

Straight to the heart of the matter.


----------

