# Not having enough sex.



## Anangel (Jan 21, 2011)

Hi Everyone,

I am new in here, lets cut the story to short. I have been married before my ex husband was great in bed. I use to wait from morning to go back to bed i was crazy for him but ofcourse
he never loved me and we ended up getting divorce. I am happily married now with gorgeous 20mnth old son. My hubby loves me so he is the best husband a best person. even from sarting i knew that he is not that good in bed but i thought he will get better with time but sex is becoming a major issue now sometimes 1 in a month or may 1 in a 2,3 months. i absolutly love sex he is keep saying that its me i don't do enough to make him have sex. I honestly don't know what to do I am24/7 thinking about sex which is driving me mad i desperatly need help.


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## MsLonely (Sep 23, 2010)

What do you mean he's not good in bed?
What is good in bed in your views?
Can you make your true sexual life issue more specific?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Hicks (Jan 14, 2011)

If he's not good in bed, he probably realizes you feel that way and he gave up trying.


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## Anangel (Jan 21, 2011)

I mean even when we do have sex he just rush through just to get the climax. I like more hugging and kissing. I want my husband to be more kinky naughty type. I have always been shy approaching even with my ex husband. I like him to hold me and start. which i guess not everyone will agree but i find it more pleasureable. he is always tired looking at the clock worried about howmany hours sleep is left. i don't like to force i think its natural if you want sex you don't care about time but i guess i was wrong. What is more hurting is that i want him so much and it doesnt bother him. he always says that he loves me so much we get on so good we dont have any other problem. I think i have a higher sex desire then him which makes me really unhappy. I desired for men like him but now i have it i still feel something is missing which is sex.


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## MsLonely (Sep 23, 2010)

Date him.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## SoCalMark (Dec 31, 2010)

I have always wondered what that meant... "Good In Bed" because most of that could be solved if we asked our partner what we liked and then fulfill that need in us. Is good in bed mean that you want a high-wire act, softness, a pounding or snuggle after sex? What is that?


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## MsLonely (Sep 23, 2010)

I'm not joking. Married couple should keep dating each other.
Now my husband and me date at least once a week.
When it's a date, it will push your husband to think about doing something special & being romantic to you.
 give him some hints and ask him to date you, also can!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## gregj123 (Dec 29, 2010)

Some men just dont like it others, do stop comparing him to ur ex too.make it exciting for him to that turns a guy on tease him a little


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## Anangel (Jan 21, 2011)

First of all i thank you all for the suggestions, you kno i have never compared him to my ex. Because they are opposite each other. we talk a lot he do kno what i like or not. I was virgin untill i got married so every thing happened was all new to me and was very exciting. He was a sex manic and sometimes we use to have sex four times a day. Marriage lasted for two and a half year. I loved him so much very dearly but he was cheating on me and other family problems. he couldnt stand me when we were in family once we are in room all of the sudden different person comes out but i still given many chances then he started to drink excessivly and become very abusive and satrted to raise hand. we got separated and i came back to saty with my family where i found my present husband he was aware of the situation. we had a great understanding when i got divorce after two years of dating we got married and straight away i was fallen pregnant. we did not have any sexsual intercourse untill our son was born. we had sex when my son was 2 months old. since then sexlife become miserable. we talk about it every couple of weeks but nothing happens both of us cry. he takes it personal even if i start to say that there could be some medical issue. i thrive for sex but end up crying every night when i see him snore. he is a joiner and electrician his job is mentally tiring i do understand. if you say i dont tease him i do i have trying wearing sexy lengerie, sleeping half naked trying hugging him kissing him but then i just become sad and force my self to go sleep. I do mean it that he is very loving caring hubby but he just doesnt like sex. he is 32 and I am 28. Sorry story has become to long.

Thanks.


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## Anangel (Jan 21, 2011)

I got caught last night about this forum, he read it all and was very upset. well this morning i passed my driving test in first attempt and he was very happy and jumping up and down. lets wait untill evening when he is back from work how he will act. I am feeling very shamefull, i don't kno how i'm gonna handle this situation may my test passing will help fingers cross!


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

So very sorry he caught what you wrote here, putting aside your X , you clearly love your husband, you desire him wildly, you expressed such things - these he needs to take to heart. 

I can tell by the way you described your X- he was a HIGH Testestoerone man, sex 4 times a day and STILL cheated, aggressive, abusive - all the signs are there, He was not able to control that irritableness inside of him. Generally these kinds are GREAT in bed (bad boy type), they have that aggressive edge, that wild Erotic passion, full of lust in the moment, but less capable of affection outside the bedroom , always wanting to roam, get into something. 

After experiencing this, you are now married to what sounds like the complete opposite , the more passive very loving Lower testosterone man >> he doesn't generally crave sex to the degree as your former HOT lover, or pursue it as aggressively. It is all in the hormones. 

You go on about how Loving & good he is, but in the bedroom, he does not sound all that affectionate, taking time for pleasurous forplay, holding & making sure you get your "O". 

Kinda trips me up as Generally these types of loving men WANT to please their wives, they are very giving , gentle & intimatly affectionate, the type that can generally hold thier wives & not get antsy & angry if it does not end in sex. ..... You say MONTHS go by without intercourse, that you & he cry about this issue, that he is always snoring, looking at the clock, worried about getting enough sleep. 

Question: Does he have morning erections? Is he falling asleep after work? Sometimes even younger men can have a drop in their Testosterone levels from too much stress at work, meds ? -that could hinder their desire & sex drives. Or is there a possibilty he is taking care of himself , maybe has become accustomed to this while you was pregnant, gotten into the habit & not letting go, then has little left over for you ? 

Please take advantage of morning sex if you can, as this is generally the horniest time for men, their Test levels the highest. Have him go to sleep earlier, set the alarm an hour earlier, and be daring, go down on him! he should love being woke up like this. 

And hopefully he will hear you about your desire for more affectionate sensuous hugging/kissing/touching/teasing forplay when you are intimate, these things are very important for us women.


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## Anangel (Jan 21, 2011)

Hey, thanks for taking the time to go through my story as i have mentioned before that he found out that i was on this site and we had detailed conversation about it. I kno i have hurt him by writting something about him which really hurted him and i am deeply sorry about that. We discussed all areas of our relationship and i said to him that it is my right to have you in bed and i am not getting that. he said you have never played any part in it. by nature as i have told you before that i am quite shy approaching and he knew very well but i said i will try to be more open. to be honest i have never given him a blowjob because i just hate i can't stand the word blowjob which i beleive he would enjoy as much i would want him to do anything for me. i was very scared that what would he think about me that i am going on about our relationship on the web but sware to god he is forgiven me for this but deep down i feel that i had hurt him badly. but i love him so much that i can't even imagine life without him, i'll die without him. you kno what he said to me that he loves me madly that he beleives i have touched his soul and become one. his problem is that he thinks long ahead takes pressure likes everything organised in life not any struggle for me or my son, works hard hardest he can possibly do to give us good living. he wants to secure our future, thats where i beleive he puts other things beside. he has promised me that he will try and give me my time from now on.

I beleive nobody is perfect there is plenty of things need changing in me before i go on about him and i shall concentrate to become better wife.I thank all of you for your suggestions.


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