# Relationship Engineering - stories from the front



## MEM2020 (Aug 23, 2009)

As many of you may have guessed. I am attempting to get my G.E.D in Relationship Engineering (RE). That said I am keeping a log of "interactions" with my lovely better (and I mean that sincerely) half. 

Last week. 
We played racquetball several times. As usual I prevailed in every game. Great fun for both of us. Very proud of my W who despite being thrashed in a couple games - kept her focus - her poise and steadily upped her game. Excellent display of emotional strength. With this big a skill gap I personally would get somewhat demoralized and play worse. She did just the opposite. Lots of banter on the court and sincere compliments back and forth for "winners and saves". 

Interleaved with rball we played this "real time" word game. You make words out of scrabble tiles from a central pool. Thing is the other person can "steal" your word(s) by adding at least one letter and changing the root. I used to consistently win this game. Now she consistently beats me. Mid-week we started playing and she got into the zone like I have never seen before. If Merriam Webster had come back from the dead and joined us at the table, she would have given him a run for his money. To say she blew me off the table would be an understatement. I took a page out of her class act on the rball court and complimented her play while she literally ground me into the dust. Nothing hotter than a smart woman. 

And of course "interleaved" with this Greek model of healthy body/healthy mind was a delightful series of night time adventures. 

Over the weekend we had an interesting situation. My W moved my car onto the driveway and parked a little more centrally than she should have. She then asked me to run an errand in "her" car which is NEW. She did however ask that I first "move" my car out of the way so I wouldn't "scrape" it backing hers past it on the driveway. I looked out the window and assured her there was PLENTY of room to get by my car. 
For context: We both have excellent "long term" driving records though in the interest of clarity I need to add that scored by "accidents and speeding tickets" I have the BETTER record. 

What then ensued was about 10 minutes of (for me) funny to hilarious conversation during which she did everything but offer me oral sex to try to persuade me to "move my car". I laughingly offered to get the tape measure and prove that I would have at least 18" on EACH side of her car. I suggested that:
- She seemed to think my driving skills were comparable to those Stevie Wonder or Ray Charles
- Her OCD behavior was becoming worthy of a "****tail party" story

She acknowledged I could "probably" manage but asked that "just to be 100 percent sure" I move my car. 

>>>>>>>>>>>
On a serious note - and there is no way in hell I would have said this to her as the tone was light and constructive. She created this situation by parking my car a bit carelessly and by pandering to her own OCD. No WAY I am going to feed that cycle. 
>>>>>>>>>>>

Finally she asked if she could move my car. I said sure. Afterwards I told her that in any future situation where her “OCD” kicked up – I would never get in the way of “her” solving the problem.

>>>>>>>>>>> 
The reason for that is simple. Only she knows how “anxious” a situation is making her feel. If it is severe enough to warrant her solving the problem, I am completely supportive of that. If not then it won’t get solved. It is a bad idea to pander someone else's OCD's. That is a dark path leading slowly into the abyss.
>>>>>>>>>>>


----------

