# Hi I am new here and on the verge of divorce



## jfolk826 (Jun 14, 2013)

Hi my name is Jamie I am 31 years old and have been married to the love of my life for almost 10 years. 3 weeks ago my husband told me that he isn't happy and wants to separate. I have been doing everything I can to prevent that. I am at my witts end trying to save my marriage. I do not want him to leave, but things are quickly spiraling out of control. We have 3 children ages 5, 3, and 10months that we have to think about in our situation as well. The things he says makes him unhappy are things that can easily be repaired, but he holds his emotions in for so long that he has a lot of things that he just won't let go of. I am desperate to save my marriage, and feel so lost and so alone. I have had some days where I don't even leave my room, and my kids are suffering because of how badly I am suffering.

Any advice is wonderful.
Thank you.


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## 3Xnocharm (Jun 22, 2012)

What are the things that he says are making him unhappy?


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## Mrs.S. (Jun 19, 2013)

Hello - I'm sorry to hear about your situation. I'm going through a similar thing - I'm 33, don't have kids, but my husband has told me that he's unhappy and that the things wrong with our marriage have been building up for a while and he doesn't think things can really change. He's been considering whether he wants to stay in this or not for about 2.5 months now. He also has been having an EA with a girl from work for a few months. He has told me that he stopped inappropriate contact with her, but he refuses to stop talking to her and emailing with her at work. I feel like we're at rock bottom and I have no idea which way it will go. 

Anyhow, this post is not about me. Please keep us updated and I am here to be a support to you as well! My thread is actually in the Reconciliation forum because at the time that's where I thought we were headed. Anyhow, my thoughts are with you, as I know how incredibly painful this is.


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## Maneo (Dec 4, 2012)

is there a history of problems in your marriage? does your husband suffer from any physical or psychological problems? have you considered couples counseling? are there things outside the family and your relationship that could be contributing factors?


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## Alpha (Feb 18, 2013)

Did his telling you come unexpected, out of the blue? If your issues are easily fixable but yet he doesn't want to fix them mean something is up. 

Him bottling his emotions so long and then finally letting go is bulls**t. Strong chance that there is another woman. 

You should have no respect for a man who easily walks away and won't fight for his family. 

You reactions are normal but you need to start taking control immediately. Get out of your room and go straight to lawyer and find out your rights. You cannot look pathetic to your husband. Showing him that you mean business is the best thing you can do right now.


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