# It's very difficult living with someone when she thinks you have Altzheimers



## Tommy1000

My wife's father did have Alzheimer's! She is constantly searching for evidence that I am doing things, that a person with Alzheimer's would do. She is watching my every move. This is maddening and I do not think I can stand this! Just how do you prove a negative? I have been in engineering and design most of my life, but I have been out of work for the last year or slightly more. She is working and we have Social Security income. I take care of everything around the house except for some of the washing of clothes, which involves pushing a button. I also fix all the meals and cleanup, while I am looking for work during the day. And during the day, I am contacting companies, revising my resume, revising my summary, searching the net for open positions, and trying to change my field of work. I also just finished going to a security class in order to obtain a job as a security guard. This involves a reduction in my pay of about 75%. Television is our primary entertainment mode, because there is no money for anything else. Our house and property is paid for, as is one vehicle. She has the newest vehicle that we bought less than a year ago.

Staying together is the only thing that makes any sense at all, since so much that we have is paid for. To split this up and divorce would be throwing away all of our security. That, to my mind, would be insanity, since we are 67 and 75 respectively.

I would appreciate any comments or thoughts about what I have written here, and there is no one else to talk to about this problem. I will continue to write about any other developments concerning this in coming days.


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## Emerging Buddhist

Which one of you is 75?

Have a full physical letting them know the concern and give her every bit of information from the results of all the tests.

Invite her to come to the discussions even...


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## uhtred

This is really hard. 

People with alzeheimers often don't recognize it, and sometimes think it is their partners who are having problems. My mother was asking me about my father's mental condition - after she was so far gone the half the time she couldn't recognize me.

Adding to the confusion is that as people age their memories start to weaken, even without any specific dementia.

Maybe you both should be evaluated by doctors? Maybe it doesn't matter.


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## sa58

That is what doctors are for . What if you or her did start
to show signs of it ? What would you do then?
As we get older our bodies wear down.
That's part of life.


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## MattMatt

Counselling, is what I'd suggest. She is probably just very worried about you. Her concerns and your concerns must be addressed.

@Tommy1000 if this is still an issue, please do reach out to us.


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## sunsetmist

Sir, 
Many older folks have similar issues. Finding a new job at your ages is especially difficult. A medical physical should be done annually, at least, and a psychologist can rule out many cognitive issues that are not common to older age. Dr. Amen (and others) writes excellent advice (has TV shows on public TV) if you wish to read his work. He also does studies of what the brain looks like normally and otherwise.

You and your wife should find peace after gaining more professional knowledge.


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## Mr. Nail

speaking of Alzheimer's . . . Matt just replied to a two year old post by a member that hasn't been seen since he posted it.
I just wanted to get that in before a SUPER mod locks this up.


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## sunsetmist

Hey, I followed Matt and did likewise...


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## Blondilocks

Mr. Nail said:


> speaking of Alzheimer's . . . Matt just replied to a two year old post by a member that hasn't been seen since he posted it.
> I just wanted to get that in before a SUPER mod locks this up.


LOL


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