# Husband is bored with me after 24 years



## aloha (Aug 24, 2009)

After 24 years of marriage, my husband has informed me that he's bored. For the last 12 years, He's doesn't want to do activities with me - last one was a cruise to mexico and that was it. I've always asked him to accompany me to visit friends and family but he's never wanted to go. Absolutely will not go anywhere with me - except the grocery store. He always wants to ask other people to come along. Then I tell him "never mind - I didn't want to be with your friends in the first place - just you" 

He's been knowing a single lady, who is the mom of our sons friend; calls her every day - if not more often - she comes to my house when I'm not there. She is basically the female version of him. What to do? I don't know. I love him with all my heart. I told him just this weekend that I need to be with him more often, and actually feel his presence and his response was "maybe you will stay focused on going to the gym"...WTF was that? I don't know whats going on here....any advice.


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## youngNmarried (Aug 22, 2009)

i think he's trying to call you fat ... no offense . Try being more outgoing sexually , dress sexy , do things to him that you know he likes , take him to the roof of your house and make love to him like you haven't in a while make him feel wanted instead of just telling him that you need him by you .


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## preso (May 1, 2009)

He's not bored he's just disinterested it seems, as he found someone else. That is just an excuse he's using to try to place some blame on you for his actions.

far as him telling you to focus at the gym....
that wasn't very nice.


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## swedish (Mar 6, 2008)

I agree, not very nice. He is placing expectations on your request...in other words, if you want more of his time/attention, you need to stick to your commitments like working out, etc. That's how I read it anyway.


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## preso (May 1, 2009)

If my husband told me that, I'd be very tempted to say something that was equally not nice 

maybe like I could better do that if he could pay better attention to my needs in the bedroom
or 
make more money or something... so it's a good thing my husband is not prone to say things like that as it would really cause problems for him.


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## martino (May 12, 2008)

No doing this would only reinforce his "bored" behavior.



youngNmarried said:


> i think he's trying to call you fat ... no offense . Try being more outgoing sexually , dress sexy , do things to him that you know he likes , take him to the roof of your house and make love to him like you haven't in a while make him feel wanted instead of just telling him that you need him by you .


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## swedish (Mar 6, 2008)

preso said:


> If my husband told me that, I'd be very tempted to say something that was equally not nice


If I wasn't feeling good about myself, it would probably motivate me to take him up on it....but probably not in the way he would want....for me, not to please him...and the better I started to look/feel, the further I would drift...but I admit, I don't take criticism well


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## QuitaBee (Aug 11, 2009)

preso said:


> If my husband told me that, I'd be very tempted to say something that was equally not nice
> 
> maybe like I could better do that if he could pay better attention to my needs in the bedroom
> or
> make more money or something... so it's a good thing my husband is not prone to say things like that as it would really cause problems for him.


If my husband said that to me!!!!!...I'd tell him to try focus on enlarging his penis "you want be smaller and I want you bigger, isn't that ironic"....well we'd probably argue all night and not have sex for months lol....so i guess that would defeat the purpose!!!!!:rofl:


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## QuitaBee (Aug 11, 2009)

If a man is interested in someone else, i dont think there is much you can or SHOULD do, its not your fault. If you try to improve your appearance, do it for yourself!!! Because you'll only be resentful when you've tried it all (just for him) only to yield the same result.


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