# Ladies seemingly more forgiving of men



## SunCMars

Hello!

I arranged this alone time with all the ladies who post on TAM.

I asked SunCMars to take his gang of hooligans out for a few days of fishing.

Especially, _The Typist._

His constant hovering over me and his closeness is unnerving. He had to go or I could not write out my thoughts.

He is forever questioning what I do and why. 

And his eyes, they are forever roaming over me.

I am not into inter-species relationships. 

I wish to make that known.


To the point:

I suspect, and this is not a criticism of my fellow Ladies.
Female humans and my (wee type) seem more forgiving of male, in your face, peccadilloes. 

Ladies seem more forgiving of phallus-ed males than we do of our cleft bearing sisters..

Please give me your opinion on this, I will follow up, being short and shortly behind you.


_Gwendolyn-_ matron of the Dublin Warren.


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## SunCMars

Please note..

It is only me posting here.
I say this because I do not want to sign off on every post.

Like the vain men here!


Gwendolyn-


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## Livvie

Forgiving of what behavior?


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## SunCMars

Men acting as men.

Some rude, some crude, some secret, some flagrant cheaters.

Just acting their carefree self, with that dangling down, appendage of theirs.

Them, thinking themselves superior. 

If a lady acted thus, they would be hated by their gender, instantly.
Men, are more likely forgiven.

More likely, not proffering absolutes.


_G-_


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## TheDudeLebowski

We judge ourselves hardest. In seeing those more like ourselves, we judge them harder than those less like ourselves. 

Dudette-


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## RandomDude

_Resisting male urge to threadjack_


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## Violet28

Manners are manners in either sex, if a man or woman is burping, farting, and scratching themselves inappropriately through social situations in life, I doubt either would be viewed favorably.


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## SunCMars

TheDudeLebowski said:


> We judge ourselves hardest. In seeing those more like ourselves, we judge them harder than those less like ourselves.
> 
> Dudette-





RandomDude said:


> _Resisting male urge to threadjack_


Permission granted


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## C.C. says ...

I think I’ve misinterpreted this post but um... 

What do you mean by ‘cleft bearing sisters’. The visual on that isn’t good. 😆

We forgive mouthy, **** swinging men, because they’re men and men are supposed to be strong and ballsy. There’s men here that when they speak their minds, some ladies here hate them and call them “pricks” but I like those kinds of men. You never have to guess what you’re working with. Plus, it’s just sexy. Manly. (But ok I have daddy issues so maybe I’m in the minority) Of course there’s a fine line between manly and full blown douchbag. I’ve found personally that “nice guys” are often the most devious, stalking you and seething with anger while hiding behind flowers and heart emojis.

Other women usually don’t like other women to act aggressively. It’s just not feminine or accommodating so their claws come out. A lot of times, they don’t want to hear a woman with a harsh opinion, because then they see it as a challenge and swiftly get to work on taking her down a peg. Women work in a different way than men. They side eye each other until they know if they are dealing with a friend or foe. A friend would be someone non threatening that talks kindly to them without any hint of jealousy or undermining. A foe is a ***** that becomes a thorn in your side and follows you around and makes snide comments just because they don’t like you for whatever reason. You don’t know the reason. They don’t know the reason. They just _do_.

You think it’s hard being a man?

Pulease.

I don’t even think your brains delve that far into it. With men, it’s all good hearted ribbing and a ‘how ya doing, man?’ to make a friend. Women are much more complex.

P.S. I just read @TheDudeLebowski ‘s post and if it’s true, which it very well may be from what I’ve been reading lately about his very same thing, it’s scary! We don’t _want_ to be that person that rubs us the wrong way. Are we really just looking in the mirror?


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## SunCMars

Violet28 said:


> Manners are manners in either sex, if a man or woman is burping, farting, and scratching themselves inappropriately through social situations in life, I doubt either would be viewed favorably.


Ah, not favorably for neither, more so unfavorable for us, the boobed set.

We ladies are expected to set the example.
Mommies do not fart out loud, daddies can't resist.

Boys, proudly burb and fart. At least around our warren.
Hell, our men do not reprimand them!


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## Mr.Married

Oh come on SunCMars ..... are you having a little phallic envy ? Am I supposed to do the helicopter now 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣?????

Men are testosterone driven pigs and women like it...... just like I like watching them sway their hips as they walk away.


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## TheDudeLebowski

Let's just say I've seen more harsh judgement of men by other men, and more harsh judgement of women by other women.

I don't know what it's like to be a woman, therefore the benefit of the doubt exists when judging the opposite sex. It doesn't when judging same sex. 

Maybe I have misread sunC, er, Gwendolyn's post tho.


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## SunCMars

C.C. says ... said:


> I think I’ve misinterpreted this post but um...
> 
> What do you mean by ‘cleft bearing sisters’. The visual on that isn’t good. 😆
> 
> We forgive mouthy, **** swinging men, because they’re men and men are supposed to be strong and ballsy. There’s men here that when they speak their minds, some ladies here hate them and call them “pricks” but I like those kinds of men. You never have to guess what you’re working with. Plus, it’s just sexy. Manly. (But ok I have daddy issues so maybe I’m in the minority) Of course there’s a fine line between manly and full blown douchbag. I’ve found personally that “nice guys” are often the most devious, stalking you and seething with anger while hiding behind flowers and heart emojis.
> 
> Other women usually don’t like other women to act aggressively. It’s just not feminine or accommodating so their claws come out. A lot of times, they don’t want to hear a woman with a harsh opinion, because then they see it as a challenge and swiftly get to work on taking her down a peg. Women work in a different way than men. They side eye each other until they know if they are dealing with a friend or foe. A friend would be someone non threatening that talks kindly to them without any hint of jealousy or undermining. A foe is a *** that becomes a thorn in your side and follows you around and makes snide comments just because they don’t like you for whatever reason. You don’t know the reason. They don’t know the reason. They just _do_.
> 
> You think it’s hard being a man?
> 
> Pulease.
> 
> I don’t even think your brains delve that far into it. With men, it’s all good hearted ribbing and a ‘how ya doing, man?’ to make a friend. Women are much more complex.
> 
> P.S. I just read @TheDudeLebowski ‘s post and if it’s true, which it very well may be from what I’ve been reading lately about his very same thing, it’s scary! We don’t _want_ to be that person that rubs us the wrong way. Are we really just looking in the mirror?


 Oh, thank youuu!

Let me tell you about life in our warren.

It is all about tradition and conditioning.

Men chase the ladies, we run, we trip, we get caught. 
We resist, but, at last give in.
We kiss and say goodbye.

Most of the men in my warren are cheaters.

The few that are not are either very old, very jolly fat, lazy, or passive.
They only want to be fed and have their hair and back rubbed.

They become our man-servants, we friend zone them. 

We do, now and then take them to bed and get them off.
But, only if they go out of their way for one of us.

Yes, we give them (and others) pity sex.

We feel it is our duty to keep our men happy. 
Plus, it is no sweat off our back, they do all the work.

Our men are cheaters, we tolerate, have gotten used to it.

If one of our ladies goes against tradition and slips in another males bed unbeknownst, she is shunned.

When I was young I chased many a lady away from my male companion. I chased them with a long switch.

I was fearsome back then.

Now, I only romp with _Brian_, our King.

Ah, he is the biggest of cheaters.

You should see him when _The Red Queen_ comes around1

His cod piece sticks out a foot, his face gets all blushy red.

It infuriates me.

Though, I love _The Red Queen_. I have no bad thoughts about her. 
I love her so.

All the men here are pigs.


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## SunCMars

Mr.Married said:


> Oh come on SunCMars ..... are you having a little phallic envy ? Am I supposed to do the helicopter now 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣?????
> 
> Men are testosterone driven pigs and women like it...... just like I like watching them sway their hips as they walk away.


Read the initial post, this is _Gwendolyn_.
All the men went down to the Caribbean to fish for _Red Groupers._

*See, the men ignore me**.*
*And they do not read well, at all.*

Ooh, men are dumb.


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## RandomDude

SunCMars said:


> Permission granted


And the sausage fest continues!


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## JustTheWife

Yes, i think that's probably true that women are more forgiving. I think women instinctively fear abandonment and that's the biggest threat of their man cheating. Perhaps that makes it more of a logically based decision to forgive (not saying that it's not also very emotional). It seems a lot more personal for men when they are cheated on...another man has HAD their wife. So very emotional. As discussed in another thread, men also probably have some kind of instinctual drive to not have a LT relationship and building a family with someone who might end up cuckolding them (classic meaning of making their husband raise someone else's kid - in a classical sense one of the most humiliating things for a man and also parallels in the animal kingdom. But I guess there are different ways of looking at everything.


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## Livvie

I don't think women tolerate cheaters any more/better than they tolerate bad behavior from females. Was that the question? Kinda?


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## Livvie

Or are your postulating women tolerate a cheating partner better than men tolerate a cheating partner?


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## Livvie

I think women stay with men who have cheated on them (or who they aren't really into generally) because they are using said man for money.

Which I think is a horrid dishonest thing.


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## C.C. says ...

SunCMars said:


> Men chase the ladies, we run, we trip, we get caught.
> We resist, but, at last give in.
> We kiss and say goodbye


I’m so lost. You’re a lady?  What? Omg somebody help me. What is being said right now? I’m utterly confused.


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## C.C. says ...

No, for real. ... I’m up there babbling on about men and women and their differences in general and this is about forgiving cheaters? Omg I feel so stupid. 🤦‍♀️ Now I don’t even know if SunC is a woman or a man with multiple personality disorder. Someone help me, pleaseeee?


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## RandomDude

C.C. says ... said:


> I’m so lost. You’re a lady?  What? Omg somebody help me. What is being said right now? I’m utterly confused.


@SunCMars is quite simply beyond our comprehension.


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## Mr.Married

SunCMars said:


> Read the initial post, this is _Gwendolyn_.
> All the men went down to the Caribbean to fish for _Red Groupers._
> 
> *See, the men ignore me**.*
> *And they do not read well, at all.*
> 
> Ooh, men are dumb.


Hey !!! 70% of people are dumb but I’m in the other 40% 😁


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## Openminded

I disagree, SCM.


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## SunCMars

Livvie said:


> I don't think women tolerate cheaters any more/better than they tolerate bad behavior from females. Was that the question? Kinda?


Women expect worse from men.
Then, when they see it, they roll their eyes, shrug their shoulders.

If it is a man close to them, and not their spouse, or LTR, they do not hold it (long) against the dude.


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## Mr.Married

Women are more tolerant because they have a high value for security and can exchange their emotional needs for money.

Men get all pissy and cry their little eyes out because they get their feelings hurt.

As I’ve always said.... Women are mentally tougher than men.


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## SunCMars

Openminded said:


> I disagree, SCM.


You mean, I disagree, Gwen!

_SunCMars_ and his _Martian_ buddies and that putz_ Typist _have gone fishin'.


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## SunCMars

Mr.Married said:


> Women are more tolerant because they have a high value for security and can exchange their emotional needs for money.
> 
> Men get all pissy and cry their little eyes out because they get their feelings hurt.
> 
> As I’ve always said.... Women are mentally tougher than men.


Yes!

Kisses for this post, coming your way!


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## Openminded

SunCMars said:


> You mean, I disagree, Gwen!
> 
> _SunCMars_ and his _Martian_ buddies and that putz_ Typist _have gone fishin'.


I disagree with all your versions.


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## Mr.Married

What was the name of that show with the guy with all those different personalities and then he would eat his victims?

Are you hungry ????? 😜


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## Mr.Married

Split .... that’s the name of it !!!!

Your the female version of that dude. Do you work at the zoo like he did?


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## Mr.Married

SunCMars said:


> Yes!
> 
> Kisses for this post, coming your way!


It’s true. You see this dynamic played out on TAM all the time. Of course this is a general statement but the guys come in here a wreck after being cheated on and the chicks come in making plans. That’s a big indicator of the difference in the sexes. The dynamics of relationship entanglement are very different between the two.

Take note: I never said one is the right or wrong way.... just different.


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## SunCMars

Openminded said:


> I disagree with all your versions.


I too, see your adversion.


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## sokillme

I don't know, there are a hell of a lot of men who forgive much more then I would to the point of absurd.


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## SunCMars

I believe ladies forgive men their trespasses (more so) because they secretly feel powerless over them, hence they must.

I believe ladies are harder on other ladies because they have the same thoughts, and dreams.

Ladies can read other ladies better.

Ladies reading men is always a guess.
The benefit of the doubt is often applied....here.

A lady who hates other ladies often hates herself. Or, at least parts of herself.

A lady hates another woman who gains a foothold on a man using her sexual attraction.
It cheapens all women.

A man, a good man is the ultimate goal for 'most' women, not for my countrywoman, Enya.

How can a lady, properly denigrate that which is her goal in life?

_Gwendolyn-_ still


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## SunCMars

sokillme said:


> I don't know, there are a hell of a lot of men who forgive much more then I would to the point of absurd.


Yes, do not encourage_ The Typist!_


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## Mr.Married

SunCMars said:


> Ladies can read other ladies better.
> 
> _Gwendolyn-_ still


Because they are creatures of indirect communication and maneuvering with the use of tone, posture, and slight.

Men are direct and won’t pick up on many a female que that other females easily recognize.


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## TheDudeLebowski

Mr.Married said:


> It’s true. You see this dynamic played out on TAM all the time. Of course this is a general statement but the guys come in here a wreck after being cheated on and the chicks come in making plans. That’s a big indicator of the difference in the sexes. The dynamics of relationship entanglement are very different between the two.
> 
> Take note: I never said one is the right or wrong way.... just different.


Confirmation bias says I


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## Mr.Married

TheDudeLebowski said:


> Confirmation bias says I


I don’t know ... maybe so. I’ve never been divorced or had problems so I don’t relate to the situation well. I can only evaluate what I see from the outside looking in. I would like to think I’m equally nonbiased along both male and female lines


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## TheDudeLebowski

The machismo routine on TAM gets tiring. Seems every man here here gives multiple orgasms without even trying. Has a 12" shlong. Will send other men running home crying to mommy with only a sharp stare if they dare disrespect them ... 

Overcompensation for their personal insecurities


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## Livvie

SunCMars said:


> I believe ladies forgive men their trespasses (more so) because they secretly feel powerless over them, hence they must.
> 
> I believe ladies are harder on other ladies because they have the same thoughts, and dreams.
> 
> Ladies can read other ladies better.
> 
> Ladies reading men is always a guess.
> The benefit of the doubt is often applied....here.
> 
> A lady who hates other ladies often hates herself. Or, at least parts of herself.
> 
> A lady hates another woman who gains a foothold on a man using her sexual attraction.
> It cheapens all women.
> 
> A man, a good man is the ultimate goal for 'most' women, not for my countrywoman, Enya.
> 
> How can a lady, properly denigrate that which is her goal in life?
> 
> _Gwendolyn-_ still


Yes but Gwendolyn you must admit that part of you also thinks men are stupid for letting a woman gain a foothold based on sexual attraction alone (when a man literally worships an attractive B I T C H).


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## Blondilocks

Dear Gwendolyn, methinks you have two points here:
1. women judging women differently than they judge men
2. women forgiving their man more easily than a man forgiving their woman

Let's look at point #1. As The Dude alluded to, women know their own kind and are more confident in ascertaining their motives etc. With men, it's a guessing game since they are DIFFERENT!

Point 2. A woman may seem more forgiving of her man than a man in the same circumstance for various reasons ie finances, children etc; but, I can assure you that while a woman may not be surprised that another woman's man acted like a pig she will be gobsmacked that HER man stooped to such a low level. She will NEVER hold him in the same high regard going forward. She may swear on a stack of Bibles that she has forgiven all the while knowing in the back of her mind that if he so much as thinks of stepping out of line again that all bets are off and he'd better sleep with one eye open. This is, of course, just my humble input. I do not pretend to speak for all ladies.


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## SunCMars

Livvie said:


> Yes but Gwendolyn you must admit that part of you also thinks men are stupid for letting a woman gain a foothold based on sexual attraction alone (when a man literally worships an attractive B I T C H).


Men are stupid.
Many ladies need them this way.


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## SunCMars

Blondilocks said:


> Dear Gwendolyn, methinks you have two points here:
> 1. women judging women differently than they judge men
> 2. women forgiving their man more easily than a man forgiving their woman
> 
> Let's look at point #1. As The Dude alluded to, women know their own kind and are more confident in ascertaining their motives etc. With men, it's a guessing game since they are DIFFERENT!
> 
> Point 2. A woman may seem more forgiving of her man than a man in the same circumstance for various reasons ie finances, children etc; but, I can assure you that while a woman may not be surprised that another woman's man acted like a pig she will be gobsmacked that HER man stooped to such a low level. She will NEVER hold him in the same high regard going forward. She may swear on a stack of Bibles that she has forgiven all the while knowing in the back of her mind that if he so much as thinks of stepping out of line again that all bets are off and he'd better sleep with one eye open. This is, of course, just my humble input. I do not pretend to speak for all ladies.


I love your take on things. I agree with this.

Now that I have you attention, tell me, do you have our dog?

Are you hiding our beloved _Red Dog_?

There have been allegations that howling has been heard from your SOCAL home?

Don't lie, I am a crafty woman.
I do magic.

I can readily tell if you slip-fib!


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## Mr.Married




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## Openminded

In general:

I think that women tend to be more practical about men than men are about women. I think we are usually less romantic. We don’t tend to put men on a pedestal as men often do with us (although there are definitely some of us who will take full advantage of that -- and of you). We are considerably less naive about men than men are about us. IMO, men and women are so different it’s surprising any relationship works well long-term. Apparently, we feel it’s worth it (until we don’t).


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## Blondilocks

SunCMars said:


> I love your take on things. I agree with this.
> 
> Now that I have you attention, tell me, do you have our dog?
> 
> Are you hiding our beloved _Red Dog_?
> 
> There have been allegations that howling has been heard from your SOCAL home?
> 
> Don't lie, I am a crafty woman.
> I do magic.
> 
> I can readily tell if you slip-fib!


Hiding him? How do you hide a mutt of that size? He's sprawled across half of my family room while watching some silly Harry Potter show and giving me dirty looks because I haven't dished up his bowl of butter pecan ice cream, yet. I'm tellin' ya, he's eating me out of house and home again. Give him a whistle, will ya?


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## Mr.Married

Openminded said:


> In general:
> 
> I think that women tend to be more practical about men than men are about women. I think we are usually less romantic. We don’t tend to put men on a pedestal as men often do with us (although there are definitely some of us who will take full advantage of that -- and of you). We are considerably less naive about men than men are about us. IMO, men and women are so different it’s surprising any relationship works well long-term. Apparently, we feel it’s worth it (until we don’t).


Nailed it !


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## TheDudeLebowski

If monetary situations and physical stature were reversed throughout history, we would be telling a different story in this thread


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## DownByTheRiver

There are things that can't be forgiven in the sense of making up with someone because of ethical reasons. You can be with someone quite a while and then find out something about them that is just a deal breaker for you and it may be something tangible or it may just be something you found out about them that was unethical that is just not acceptable to you. So you may forgive them sometime but that doesn't mean you would ever accept them.


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## TheDudeLebowski

Scratch what I said above, just physical stature is all that needs be reversed. The money would go along with it, naturally.

If women could just kick the ish out of men throughout history, they would control the money. In turn, men would have been required to be more emotionally manipulative to get what they want. So they would be the ones with the thousands of years head start on figuring out and controlling the other gender. There would be all sorts of gold digging men ... All that stuff would be reversed.


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## Chaotic

Maybe I am stating the obvious or maybe this is somewhat a generational thing, but I feel like there is a huge variation on the ability to forgive through both genders; I think it's more personality-reliant than gender-specific. Some people become angry and hold grudges over tiny things, some people are doormats and allow others to take advantage of them, some people are wise and experienced enough to set boundaries and deal in a fair and kind way with others. None of that is gender-specific. I've seen plenty of men and women behave in all those ways. 

But then I think I always tend to put more stock in individual personalities than gender. Perhaps I am naive.


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## TheDudeLebowski

Well, there's endless examples of women in physically abusive relationships that still stay there. Is it that they are more forgiving of their abusive man, or unable to forgive themselves for some perceived personal wrong doing? Thus, they feel they somehow deserve to be on the receiving end of the abuse, and stay in the toxic relationship.

This works both ways of course, and with many types of abuse. A lot is justified by the abused one feeling they deserve it somehow. So its still a forgiveness issue.


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## DownByTheRiver

It's fear and Hope that they'll change. they often harken back to the very beginning of the relationship when the man was totally faking it and lying to them being nice. They just can't accept reality.


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## SunCMars

Openminded said:


> In general:
> 
> I think that women tend to be more practical about men than men are about women. I think we are usually less romantic. We don’t tend to put men on a pedestal as men often do with us (although there are definitely some of us who will take full advantage of that -- and of you). We are considerably less naive about men than men are about us. IMO, men and women are so different it’s surprising any relationship works well long-term. Apparently, we feel it’s worth it (until we don’t).


Love this..


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## SunCMars

If men were not romantic, there would no need of any of that amorous semantic, words being mere pedantic.

Oh, sorry.

I sound like that blasted _Typist_ !!


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## SunCMars

Blondilocks said:


> Hiding him? How do you hide a mutt of that size? He's sprawled across half of my family room while watching some silly Harry Potter show and giving me dirty looks because I haven't dished up his bowl of butter pecan ice cream, yet. I'm tellin' ya, he's eating me out of house and home again. Give him a whistle, will ya?


Me instinks, they neer fell me yetz.

...................................................

Expect an army of pissed-off, battle ready Martians, soon to descend upon your household.

Hint:

Buy more ice cream, lots more.
Borrow some from Nancy Pelosi.

Oh, and..........

RUN!


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## TheDudeLebowski

Fear, sure. Fear of failure stems


DownByTheRiver said:


> It's fear and Hope that they'll change.


What is the fear exactly?


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## DownByTheRiver

Of intensifying abuse if they leave and they're right because that will trigger the worst abuse. You have to get organized to leave.


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## TheDudeLebowski

DownByTheRiver said:


> Of intensifying abuse if they leave and they're right because that will trigger the worst abuse. You have to get organized to leave.


There's organizations dedicated to this. So now that we have that excuse out of the way, let's talk about the second part I quoted... Hope that they will change. Why?


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## Livvie

I think a lot of the time it's people don't want to give up the $$$$.


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## TheDudeLebowski

If the person does change, will that erase the abuse they suffered at the hands of their abuser? Or will it erase something else?

Fear of failure, where does that come from? Some person with a fear of failure, will they try their hardest to get the help they need, or will they more likely do minimum to complete their self fulfilling prophecy?


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## SunCMars

This change..

Is it nickle and dime change, or about-face change?
Remember the Leopard and his spots.

Forget the spots, focus on the ill temper and his claws.

A desperate wife will close her eyes to abuse, dream it is happening less, soon gone, that sometime later.

My man loves me......he does.


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## SunCMars

Is this love that we women have with our man, Paradise?
Or, is it a _pair-of-dice_ that will fall, rarely in your favor, your flavor?


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## TheDudeLebowski

SunCMars said:


> Is this love that we women have with our man, Paradise?
> Or, is it a _pair-of-dice_ that will fall, rarely in your favor, your flavor?


The only person whoever disappoints one, ultimately, can always be seen in the mirror.


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## DownByTheRiver

TheDudeLebowski said:


> There's organizations dedicated to this. So now that we have that excuse out of the way, let's talk about the second part I quoted... Hope that they will change. Why?


Because they don't understand human psychology.


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## SunCMars

When we release a man, we realize it is us that fills, at last, vastly, him.
We are the stuffing of men.
Without us, they ring hollow.

Without a man we are not these inflators, nay, we are filled with these fluff dreams and we have nowhere to unload them.


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## SunCMars

TheDudeLebowski said:


> The only person whoever disappoints one, ultimately, can always be seen in the mirror.


Like dominoes, those disappointed fall, one, then the next, and yet another.

This, nay be true, lest you be an orphan, marooned solely, on a deserted isle.
Such, there are no knowing others to disappoint, done past, that future.


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## TheDudeLebowski

DownByTheRiver said:


> Because they don't understand human psychology.


Indeed.

Not that it matters much. Knowing one's self doesn't always result in positive changes made.


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## SunCMars

Ow fair a wombin is from her ome is war her heart layeth, thar.
Ma art beets in ma Kings chessa.

.......................................................................................................

How far a women is from her home is where her heart lays, there.
My heart beats in my Kings chest.


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## C.C. says ...

👎 This whole thread.

It’s like those nightmares I get when I take the Xanax too close to the Tramadol.


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## DownByTheRiver

TheDudeLebowski said:


> Indeed.
> 
> Not that it matters much. Knowing one's self doesn't always result in positive changes made.


No, it doesn't, and when it does it happens very slowly.


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## SunCMars

DownByTheRiver said:


> Because they don't understand human psychology.


They know ape psychology, the better, and apply it not to their human, not kind, brethren.
No one wants to admit, our, this monkey business.

The primitive mind rules when the chips are played off, now gone.


----------



## SunCMars

C.C. says ... said:


> 👎 This whole thread.
> 
> It’s like those nightmares I get when I take the Xanax too close to the Tramadol.


We wish to travel from Xanadu to Trafalgar.
If not now, in our feminine dreams.


----------



## TheDudeLebowski

SunCMars said:


> Like dominoes, those disappointed fall, one, then the next, and yet another.
> 
> This, nay be true, lest you be an orphan, marooned solely, on a deserted isle.
> Such, there are no knowing others to disappoint, done past, that future.


Nobody makes it through socialization unscathed. Nor isolation. So what of it then?

Stones placed in rivers redirect the water's path until they are removed. Can't remove them all alone, yet some can only be seen by one's self alone.


----------



## Livvie

SunCMars said:


> When we release a man, we realize it is us that fills, at last, vastly, him.
> We are the stuffing of men.
> Without us, they ring hollow.
> 
> Without a man we are not these inflators, nay, we are filled with these fluff dreams and we have nowhere to unload them.


Now, now. 

That's not totally true.

You really aren't Gwendolyn, or you'd know.

Women are creators. Have you ever been pregnant and grown a child inside your body? Nursed it with your breasts? Been it's everything? Put your blood, sweat and tears into its life and built a beautiful life for it?

Women have more to offer the world than as it relates to men!


----------



## SunCMars

That harsh lady tone comes from our mothers voice, long ago recorded in our cerebellum (the Serenade Bellowing).


----------



## RandomDude

C.C. says ... said:


> ...take the Xanax too close to the Tramadol...


So that's how you trigger a brainfart.


----------



## SunCMars

Livvie said:


> Now, now.
> 
> That's not totally true.
> 
> You really aren't Gwendolyn, or you'd know.
> 
> Women are creators. Have you ever been pregnant and grown a child inside your body? Nursed it with your breasts? Been it's everything? Put your blood, sweat and tears into its life and built a beautiful life for it?
> 
> Women have more to offer the world than as it relates to men!


That's the spirit!
I do agree!


But, without the man....
Oh, I will not say it.

_"Who am I to tear into flesh, both mine and my kind?"
"That would be so unkind of me, also your gender, one not now, being that gently tender".

"Picking at the wound that is man and women is the bigger scab told"._


----------



## C.C. says ...

RandomDude said:


> So that's how you trigger a brainfart.
> 
> View attachment 72321


Oh god it gets worse. 🤦‍♀️


----------



## SunCMars

Off topic, is now topically visible here.


----------



## SunCMars

Ladies seemingly are more forgiving of men.
Why is this?


----------



## Livvie

SunCMars said:


> Ladies seemingly are more forgiving of men.
> Why is this?


Asked and answered.

$$$$$$$$$$$$.

See how forgiving a woman is of a man on the lower $$ end of the spectrum.


----------



## SunCMars




----------



## SunCMars

Livvie said:


> Asked and answered.
> 
> $$$$$$$$$$$$.
> 
> See how forgiving a woman is of a man on the lower $$ end of the spectrum.


I am lucky, funny that thought.

In our warren everyone is rich, we all own gold, it is our birthright.
To be poor and unwanted, what a dire, so sad fact.

I would give all my gold for that last poor, good man.
I would save just a bit for mine and his ring finger.


----------



## SunCMars




----------



## Blondilocks

Having a discussion with Gwendolyn and her head mates is rather like herding cats.


----------



## Aviator

SunCMars said:


> Ladies seemingly are more forgiving of men.
> Why is this?


I'm a man. They aren't. For some reason women just retract their "claws" with men... perhaps knowing they can't win the fight or it will be too costly.

Women I've known remember every wrong... forever. That ain't forgiveness. My temper is ginormous but I've forgotten and therefore forgiven a wrong within a day or two. Unless it was some man making time with my woman... these wrongs are never forgotten.

Men were once a different animal. I think we're only shadows of what we once were (like dogs to wolves). I think modern living, porn, and convenience have made us weak and pitiable.


----------



## SunCMars

Blondilocks said:


> Having a discussion with Gwendolyn and her head mates is rather like herding cats.


Why is this?

Has Queen Nemesis been round and about?


----------



## SunCMars

Aviator said:


> I'm a man. They aren't. For some reason women just retract their "claws" with men... perhaps knowing they can't win the fight or it will be too costly.
> 
> Women I've known remember every wrong... forever. That ain't forgiveness. My temper is ginormous but I've forgotten and therefore forgiven a wrong within a day or two. Unless it was some man making time with my woman... these wrongs are never forgotten.
> 
> Men were once a different animal. I think we're only shadows of what we once were (like dogs to wolves). I think modern living, porn, and convenience have made us weak and pitiable.


I like this post!


----------



## Blondilocks

SunCMars said:


> Why is this?
> 
> Has Queen Nemesis been round and about?


Sometimes it's hard to tell if it's a skirt or a kilt.


----------



## SunCMars

Aviator said:


> I'm a man. They aren't. For some reason women just retract their "claws" with men... perhaps knowing they can't win the fight or it will be too costly.
> 
> Women I've known remember every wrong... forever. That ain't forgiveness. My temper is ginormous but I've forgotten and therefore forgiven a wrong within a day or two. Unless it was some man making time with my woman... these wrongs are never forgotten.
> 
> Men were once a different animal. I think we're only shadows of what we once were (like dogs to wolves). I think modern living, porn, and convenience have made us weak and pitiable.



Forgiving and forgetting are two different animals.
We never forget a slight. 

Our memory is our shield against, further-of-the-same.

We also imagine a goodly number of slights, methinks.
This allows us the _convenient_ dislike of another.
The benefit of the doubt, we are stingy with, mostly with other females.


----------



## aine

I think woman generally have a higher tolerance level for BS in all its shapes and forms. Something to do with estrogen, nurturing, etc.


----------



## SunCMars

Blondilocks said:


> Sometimes it's hard to tell if it's a skirt or a kilt.


Shes the last person you would want to meet after committing wrongdoing.
She knows no compromise.


----------



## SunCMars

aine said:


> I think woman generally have a higher tolerance level for BS in all its shapes and forms. Something to do with estrogen, nurturing, etc.


Edit..
This I disagree with on some levels, agree with when it comes to nurturing.

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< = >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Our skin is much thinner, we thus enjoy more the caresses, yet can tolerate less easy the stings and barbs.

Aye, and we are attuned to our environment.

We are on the edge, live as edgy beings.
Tense beauties, we.

My Brian says I quiver all day, lay still only in rest.


----------



## SunCMars

When it comes to our children, we endure the worst of their behavior as no men on Earth can so manage.

Our children come first.
Always and forever.

As a mother, our children can hurt us, that no man could ever suppose.

Men love their children in an up and down manner.
We, as women, worship them.

................................................................................................
_Amended-

Aye, their are some women who worship too much their children, they raise them too high and they starve them of the good air. They push them to their ends. They do this with their girls, less so the boys._


----------



## Ragnar Ragnasson

There're a lot of responses. I'm going to have to read deeper before even considering commenting. 

Great thread!


----------



## SunCMars

A good man will always stand up for his family.
A mother will readily die protecting it.


----------



## Luminous

SunCMars said:


> A good man will always stand up for his family.
> A mother will readily die protecting it.


Only after the man has died first trying to protect it...


----------



## SunCMars

As a woman, you a lady....

I ask you, whether you _like_ men, these males, as they are, and not as you wish they were.

I ask you_ not_, if you totally accept their behavior,* I ask you, if you are more forgiving of the male behavior you disapprove of?*
Such behavior in a man, than say, in a woman?

It is this forgiving, this overlooking, I so inquire.

A man, your spouse or significant other gets the more rigorous look-at, look-over, I know this, surely.
My man gets the microscope inspection, the smell test, and the lie detector look.

If he fails, he gets the electric chair.....um, I wish.
No I don't, I need him alive, warts and all.

What about men who do not touch you intimately, so privately, and those not your own boys?
If they do those things that males are famous for, do you overlook this behavior?


_Gwendolyn-_ matron of the Dublin warren. I amthe originator of this thread.


----------



## SunCMars

My Brian says I quiver all day, lay still only in rest. 

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< = >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
A follow up-

He loves to watch me as I lay naked in bed, on a cold night, no covers.
He lightly runs his finger-tips over my goose-bumps, making my skin under his fingers tremble, shiver, quiver more.

My nipples are his favorite toy.
Especially, when huge, starved for heat, for love.
His lips are my joy!


----------



## Ragnar Ragnasson

SunCMars said:


> My Brian says I quiver all day, lay still only in rest.
> 
> <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< = >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
> A follow up-
> 
> He loves to watch me as I lay naked in bed, on a cold night, no covers.
> He lightly runs his finger-tips over my goose-bumps, making my skin under his fingers tremble, shiver, quiver more.
> 
> My nipples are his favorite toy.
> Especially, when huge, starved for heat, for love.
> His lips are my joy!


I may have to go home for lunch!


----------



## Ragnar Ragnasson

Aviator said:


> I'm a man. They aren't. For some reason women just retract their "claws" with men... perhaps knowing they can't win the fight or it will be too costly.
> 
> Women I've known remember every wrong... forever. That ain't forgiveness. My temper is ginormous but I've forgotten and therefore forgiven a wrong within a day or two. Unless it was some man making time with my woman... these wrongs are never forgotten.
> 
> Men were once a different animal. I think we're only shadows of what we once were (like dogs to wolves). I think modern living, porn, and convenience have made us weak and pitiable.


Unless you're one of those men that was raised in more of the old world style, self sufficient, loves and protects his wife and world, has proven it to W in a long and happy M.

It's good to be the king.


----------



## SunCMars

I find it hard....

I find it hard to love a man, at times.

A man has a penis, it has its own mind, its own purposing, it ever porpoising.
That penis is my joy and my antagonist. 

It is an extender of pleasure, a *detractor* of other good things.

The penis wants release at all costs.
It is never a loyal partner.

A penis is never owned by a lady.

Nor, its owner.
The one who keeps it polished, waxed and pretty in the garage.
The owner who keeps it fueled up with lust and blood.

The penis is always the traitor to all.
It wants what it wants, it cannot, will not say NO.

It is the owner who says no, with huge, with great resistance.
It is also the garage hands, many of them, who can and will, refuse service to it.
It fails without the support of many hands, most of them internal to the man.

This is one of the reasons, as a woman, I like not, a man.
He owns a penis, and will not take total control, total ownership of it, nor, take total responsibility for it.

I want that penis, he will not give me title to it!


----------



## SunCMars

I have to pee.
I have downed three cups of tea since dawn.

We woman have not the feed pipe length, nor the extra sphincter to shut off the flow.
Gotta go, gotta go!


----------



## Luminous

SunCMars said:


> I have to pee.
> I have downed three cups of tea since dawn.
> 
> We woman have not the feed pipe length, nor the extra sphincter to shut off the flow.
> Gotta go, gotta go!


This reminds me of the joke about why do men fart more than women...


----------



## TheDudeLebowski

SunCMars said:


> A good man will always stand up for his family.
> A mother will readily die protecting it.


Higher number of women murder their infant children than men. Not even talking about abortion either. Im just talking about mom that throws her baby in a trash can to go out clubbing ...


----------



## Aviator

Ragnar Ragnasson said:


> Unless you're one of those men that was raised in more of the old world style, self sufficient, loves and protects his wife and world, has proven it to W in a long and happy M.
> 
> It's good to be the king.


With all due respect, you're no Viking, pal. I doubt you've ever had an empty belly or spent all of your waking hours providing basic necessities for your family. You're biggest concern of the day is running home at lunch for sex.

Imagine how geared up for sex your wife would be if almost half her kids died before their fifth birthday (child mortality in the 1800s). Men today have almost nothing to worry about except "am I getting good sex tonight"? And if said man doesn't get it he retreats to his device for self pleasure. He's not worried about eating, dying, or consoling his broken wife over their dead children.... he's watching sports, or his 401k, or whatever else tickles his fancy.

Yeah, we can't compare to men of old. Sure, we suffer- but we don't spend every day on the edge as our father's did. Are you reading the men's posts on here? What a bunch of whiny a$$ babies.... it's so sad what men have become.

Sorry for the thread jack!


----------



## Ragnar Ragnasson

Aviator said:


> With all due respect, you're no Viking, pal. I doubt you've ever had an empty belly or spent all of your waking hours providing basic necessities for your family. You're biggest concern of the day is running home at lunch for sex.
> 
> Imagine how geared up for sex your wife would be if almost half her kids died before their fifth birthday (child mortality in the 1800s). Men today have almost nothing to worry about except "am I getting good sex tonight"? And if said man doesn't get it he retreats to his device for self pleasure. He's not worried about eating, dying, or consoling his broken wife over their dead children.... he's watching sports, or his 401k, or whatever else tickles his fancy.
> 
> Yeah, we can't compare to men of old. Sure, we suffer- but we don't spend every day on the edge as our father's did. Are you reading the men's posts on here? What a bunch of whiny a$$ babies.... it's so sad what men have become.
> 
> Sorry for the thread jack!


Well my friend you know not of what you speak.

For those of us raised in rural America on working farms, working cattle, horses, working long hours in the fields cropping tobacco, loading watermelons, crops, it's understandable many of your group have no knowledge of the hardships. 

And I mean working before sun up to after dark, as soon as you were big enough to carry and tote.

After school snacks were bread and syrup at one point, you get my drift. 

And likely you've never raised and butchered your own meat, cut bulls, hogs, and hunted and fished for freezer stock. And it's a great life! 

And everybody knows where you stand, what you'll tolerate, what you won't. 

So, speak for yourself is my point. 

Its ok. 

You indeed may never understand living from a position of self sufficiency and confidence only a very physical as well as intellectual life brings.


----------



## Aviator

Ok, Ragnar. But now you're sitting on your rear like the rest of us typing on TAM and watching (bad) TV shows. 

Back to the thread- women were probably much kinder to each other in the 1800s too... everyone was suffering from the loss of their children so bickering about minor slights probably wasn't happening.


----------



## SunCMars

We cannot love a man,, without accepting that they are flawed, are pressured, some hopelessly.

As, are WE.

I have my flaws, do not expect me to admit them.


_G-_


----------



## TheDudeLebowski

Aviator said:


> With all due respect, you're no Viking, pal. I doubt you've ever had an empty belly or spent all of your waking hours providing basic necessities for your family. You're biggest concern of the day is running home at lunch for sex.
> 
> Imagine how geared up for sex your wife would be if almost half her kids died before their fifth birthday (child mortality in the 1800s). Men today have almost nothing to worry about except "am I getting good sex tonight"? And if said man doesn't get it he retreats to his device for self pleasure. He's not worried about eating, dying, or consoling his broken wife over their dead children.... he's watching sports, or his 401k, or whatever else tickles his fancy.
> 
> Yeah, we can't compare to men of old. Sure, we suffer- but we don't spend every day on the edge as our father's did. Are you reading the men's posts on here? What a bunch of whiny a$$ babies.... it's so sad what men have become.
> 
> Sorry for the thread jack!


What's a 401k? That $1200 stimulus check kept me from being homeless. 

I think you're projecting. At least now we know what you're about.


----------



## SunCMars

A woman, a man, they have these urges to mate, to cohabitate.
To live together as equals, with many of each's thoughts, in truth, opposing.

All this, against that better judgement, their own.

Many ladies here have said, sacrifices and compromises will be made, due to that extra money and security that a partnership will bring..
Woo a man, bring him close, hold him closer.

Take his breath away.
Steal his nectar.

Then, take freely his money.
This, to compensate the ladies requirement of putting up with all those male faults.

A husband wants an active and supporting partner.
A wife wants the same.

When the cash runs low or out, the man must go, he is out.
A wife, that poor soul who does not work, but is active and loving, she is in, a keeper.

A horrible thought.
Reality is often horrible.


----------



## Ragnar Ragnasson

Aviator said:


> Ok, Ragnar. But now you're sitting on your rear like the rest of us typing on TAM and watching (bad) TV shows.
> 
> Back to the thread- women were probably much kinder to each other in the 1800s too... everyone was suffering from the loss of their children so bickering about minor slights probably wasn't happening.


Again, still projecting it seems.

I think the Dude @TheDudeLebowski has got you pegged. 

Thanks for playing. Have a nice day.


----------



## Casual Observer

JustTheWife said:


> Yes, i think that's probably true that women are more forgiving. I think women instinctively fear abandonment and that's the biggest threat of their man cheating. Perhaps that makes it more of a logically based decision to forgive (not saying that it's not also very emotional). It seems a lot more personal for men when they are cheated on...another man has HAD their wife. So very emotional. As discussed in another thread, men also probably have some kind of instinctual drive to not have a LT relationship and building a family with someone who might end up cuckolding them (classic meaning of making their husband raise someone else's kid - in a classical sense one of the most humiliating things for a man and also parallels in the animal kingdom. But I guess there are different ways of looking at everything.


So something along these lines came up in another thread, and my thinking was that there's a really different view of initial (including virginal) sex vs what goes on later, for men and women. Speaking in generalities, for women, initial sex for a younger woman may carry feelings of emotional bonding, with the reason for sex including increasing the odds of a long term relationship with the guy. Once that LTR is accomplished, we might still (hopefully!) have desire for sex, but one reason for it might be gone. Now consider the guy. Speaking again in generalities, initial sex leads not so much to the expectation of an LTR but rather... more sex. However, over time, sex becomes, for the guy, an increasing bond with his wife. Even when the desire for that sexual bond isn't reciprocated. 

As I mentioned elsewhere, I don't think our understanding of men & women is advanced when we choose a static model, thinking Men are from Mars, Women from Venus.


----------



## RandomDude

Ragnar Ragnasson said:


> Unless you're one of those men that was raised in more of the old world style, self sufficient, loves and protects his wife and world, has proven it to W in a long and happy M.
> It's good to be the king.





Aviator said:


> With all due respect, you're no Viking, pal. I doubt you've ever had an empty belly or spent all of your waking hours providing basic necessities for your family. You're biggest concern of the day is running home at lunch for sex.





Aviator said:


> Ok, Ragnar. But now you're sitting on your rear like the rest of us typing on TAM and watching (bad) TV shows.





TheDudeLebowski said:


> What's a 401k? That $1200 stimulus check kept me from being homeless.
> I think you're projecting. At least now we know what you're about.


Where in the hell did this come from?!?!


----------



## Ragnar Ragnasson

RandomDude said:


> Where in the hell did this come from?!?!


That's what I'm sayin'. 

Like broad stroke generalizations are concrete fact in every situation.


----------



## TheDudeLebowski

RandomDude said:


> Where in the hell did this come from?!?!


A couple of avid Jordan Peterson fans compare **** sizes. 

Im just here to talk ****.


----------



## SunCMars

Casual Observer said:


> So something along these lines came up in another thread, and my thinking was that there's a really different view of initial (including virginal) sex vs what goes on later, for men and women. Speaking in generalities, for women, initial sex for a younger woman may carry feelings of emotional bonding, with the reason for sex including increasing the odds of a long term relationship with the guy. Once that LTR is accomplished, we might still (hopefully!) have desire for sex, but one reason for it might be gone. Now consider the guy. Speaking again in generalities, initial sex leads not so much to the expectation of an LTR but rather... more sex. However, over time, sex becomes, for the guy, an increasing bond with his wife. Even when the desire for that sexual bond isn't reciprocated.
> 
> As I mentioned elsewhere, I don't think our understanding of men & women is advanced when we choose a static model, thinking Men are from Mars, Women from Venus.


I agree, the notion that mentally, Men are from Mars, women from Venus is shortsighted, and limited.

We have mentally aggressive, driven women, and passive, introspective men.

Our body chemistry is widely variable, and this affects, quite a bit, how we think and present ourselves.

Our early environment plays a role in our later personality.

It can take a lifetime for some people to get over a (perceived, or real) bad childhood.

Your 'given' body limits your total development, The Village programs you a certain way.

While both situations can be overcome, how much, is often a toss up answer.
We can all cite great people from humble, maybe tragic beginnings.
A rare thing, unfortunately.

The magic in any relationship comes from the love the two share.


----------



## SunCMars

Casual Observer said:


> So something along these lines came up in another thread, and my thinking was that there's a really different view of initial (including virginal) sex vs what goes on later, for men and women. Speaking in generalities, for women, initial sex for a younger woman may carry feelings of emotional bonding, with the reason for sex including increasing the odds of a long term relationship with the guy. Once that LTR is accomplished, we might still (hopefully!) have desire for sex, but one reason for it might be gone. Now consider the guy. Speaking again in generalities, initial sex leads not so much to the expectation of an LTR but rather... more sex. However, over time, sex becomes, for the guy, an increasing bond with his wife. Even when the desire for that sexual bond isn't reciprocated.



The one factor in any successful marriage is compatibility in all major (to each) areas.
A women who is very compatible with her man in most areas will often overlook those where they are not.

Or, she will give up trying to 'change' him, 'more' to her liking. That is, if she gets 'smarter' about this.

Smarter=compromises


----------



## TXTrini

Livvie said:


> Asked and answered.
> 
> $$$$$$$$$$$$.
> 
> See how forgiving a woman is of a man on the lower $$ end of the spectrum.


Speak for yourself on this one.

My ex-husband was definitely not a high-income earner, we only made it b/c I managed our finances and worked really hard to provide a good standard of living with what we earned combined. According to this logic, I should have left him in 2011 when he had an EA, and then again in 2018, or either time when he lost his job instead of trying to be a complementary partner.


----------



## Livvie

TXTrini said:


> Speak for yourself on this one.
> 
> My ex-husband was definitely not a high-income earner, we only made it b/c I managed our finances and worked really hard to provide a good standard of living with what we earned combined. According to this logic, I should have left him in 2011 when he had an EA, and then again in 2018, or either time when he lost his job instead of trying to be a complementary partner.


It's an observation. Go read on SI and women openly admit they aren't leaving because of $$$.


----------



## TXTrini

Livvie said:


> It's an observation. Go read on SI and women openly admit they aren't leaving because of $$$.


Oh, I know some women do that, my bf's ex did exactly that to him, except she cheated first. I could easily have the mindset now, that all men are cheating assholes but, I think generalizing everyone is the start of bitterness and paying punishment forward. No wonder we're all freaking jaded!

In response to Sun's original question, I don't think women are more forgiving of men than women in general. They may be more forgiving of THEIR men depending on the nature of their trespass, b/c they ALREADY have so much invested, or because they are legally tied and try to make the best of things.

The devil you know is always better than the one you don't, unless they have truly wronged you and it becomes better to be alone than suffer pointlessly. Similarly, if a female friend irritates me, I'll ascribe it to her having something else going on and not take it personally, but if a strange female irritates me, I'd be MUCH less forgiving. So I really don't think it's a sex thing.


----------



## BruceBanner

SunCMars said:


> I believe ladies forgive men their trespasses (more so) because they secretly feel powerless over them, hence they must.
> 
> I believe ladies are harder on other ladies because they have the same thoughts, and dreams.
> 
> Ladies can read other ladies better.
> 
> Ladies reading men is always a guess.
> The benefit of the doubt is often applied....here.
> 
> A lady who hates other ladies often hates herself. Or, at least parts of herself.
> 
> A lady hates another woman who gains a foothold on a man using her sexual attraction.
> It cheapens all women.
> 
> A man, a good man is the ultimate goal for 'most' women, not for my countrywoman, Enya.
> 
> How can a lady, properly denigrate that which is her goal in life?
> 
> _Gwendolyn-_ still


I believe women forgive men's trespasses because men and women evolved different behaviors.



TheDudeLebowski said:


> The machismo routine on TAM gets tiring. Seems every man here here gives multiple orgasms without even trying. Has a 12" shlong. Will send other men running home crying to mommy with only a sharp stare if they dare disrespect them ...
> 
> Overcompensation for their personal insecurities


Can I ask where this came from?



SunCMars said:


> I find it hard....
> 
> I find it hard to love a man, at times.
> 
> A man has a penis, it has its own mind, its own purposing, it ever porpoising.
> That penis is my joy and my antagonist.
> 
> It is an extender of pleasure, a *detractor* of other good things.
> 
> The penis wants release at all costs.
> It is never a loyal partner.
> 
> A penis is never owned by a lady.
> 
> Nor, its owner.
> The one who keeps it polished, waxed and pretty in the garage.
> The owner who keeps it fueled up with lust and blood.
> 
> The penis is always the traitor to all.
> It wants what it wants, it cannot, will not say NO.
> 
> It is the owner who says no, with huge, with great resistance.
> It is also the garage hands, many of them, who can and will, refuse service to it.
> It fails without the support of many hands, most of them internal to the man.
> 
> This is one of the reasons, as a woman, I like not, a man.
> He owns a penis, and will not take total control, total ownership of it, nor, take total responsibility for it.
> 
> I want that penis, he will not give me title to it!


Are you single?



SunCMars said:


> I agree, the notion that mentally, Men are from Mars, women from Venus is shortsighted, and limited.
> 
> We have mentally aggressive, driven women, and passive, introspective men.
> 
> Our body chemistry is widely variable, and this affects, quite a bit, how we think and present ourselves.
> 
> Our early environment plays a role in our later personality.
> 
> It can take a lifetime for some people to get over a (perceived, or real) bad childhood.
> 
> Your 'given' body limits your total development, The Village programs you a certain way.
> 
> While both situations can be overcome, how much, is often a toss up answer.
> We can all cite great people from humble, maybe tragic beginnings.
> A rare thing, unfortunately.
> 
> The magic in any relationship comes from the love the two share.


There are exceptions to every rule but aggressive men are usually more rewarded in nature than the opposite.


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## blahfridge

I get so tired of the TAM trope that women only stay for the $$. It’s always more complicated then money. There’s the family unit, the extended family, the place in the community. Women are in general more relationship oriented then men. I know that’s how I was reared. It is never stated outright but the expectation is for women to tend to the home and children. That expectation has changed somewhat, but it’s still deeply ingrained in the female psyche. So we forgive because we feel we have to, because it’s what’s expected of us. 
But we don’t forget.


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## TheDudeLebowski

BruceBanner said:


> Can I ask where this came from?


My fingers on a keyboard. 

Nah, some post rubbed me wrong. There's nice dudes here, but it slips out often how much more of a man they are than other "lesser men."

Which goes along with my thoughts that men judge other men much more harshly. Heaven forbid a dude gets emotional sometimes. I believe there's a term for this. 

What is interesting is there was a thread by some broad here talking about women lacking empathy for men. The term "v-clang" I think it was, was tossed around endlessly in that thread. Of course, they would never dream of being so heartless to their man and couldn't believe some of the stories shared and the response from the men's wives. Except they cackled at their clever little term for shutting their vaginas when a man shows vulnerability. 

Don't be a vulnerable male. Don't be emotionally closed off either. Don't judge other men for being vulnerable and encourage it. Don't be a whining little ***** and cry either because you look weak. Men should be more empathetic. Men should be more strong and carry their crosses silently...

Can't win. 

Women have similar no-win situations they deal with as well that men don't have to deal with. 

Oh well. Just ignore me


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## TheDudeLebowski

Plenty of men stay for money. So its nonsense that only women do this. Guys even write songs about it...


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## TXTrini

Apologies in advance for the T/j here, Sun, but I'm compelled to respond to TheDudeLebowski

QUOTE="TheDudeLebowski, post: 20202083, member: 306962"]
What is interesting is there was a thread by some broad here talking about women lacking empathy for men. The term "v-clang" I think it was, was tossed around endlessly in that thread. Of course, they would never dream of being so heartless to their man and couldn't believe some of the stories shared and the response from the men's wives. Except they cackled at their clever little term for shutting their vaginas when a man shows vulnerability. 

Don't be a vulnerable male. Don't be emotionally closed off either. Don't judge other men for being vulnerable and encourage it. Don't be a whining little *** and cry either because you look weak. Men should be more empathetic. Men should be more strong and carry their crosses silently...

Can't win.
[/QUOTE]
I don't understand this way of thinking. Personally, I like a man who is man enough to be vulnerable and emotional with me. I feel things deeply, though I've been told many times (including by very close family) I am hard to read. So I have been actively looking for a man who can balance sensitivity and masculinity- a "manly man" and I would always clash.

My bf has shared his challenges, concerns and I've seen his eyes water sometimes when life is tough, and it's made me feel safer to be vulnerable with him. His vulnerability has not tarnished his masculinity in the least in my eyes - no "v-clamp" going on here, just the opposite. In his own estimation, he's a very average guy (I find him very attractive), average body, underemployed, and "nothing special". For the record, "bad boy" "alpha" males have always repelled me.

TheDudeLebrowski, instead of becoming embittered by what you consider "female nature", be true to yourself always reject anyone who treats you as lesser for being authentic, and find someone who complements you. Now if you're ****ed in the head, by all means, get some help, brah.


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## Luminous

TheDudeLebowski said:


> Plenty of men stay for money. So its nonsense that only women do this. Guys even write songs about it...


Depends, most of the time they stay for THEIR money, not someone else's.


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## TheDudeLebowski

What gives you the impression I'm bitter with women specifically? I think I've **** talked more men than women by far. Perhaps not?


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## TXTrini

TheDudeLebowski said:


> What gives you the impression I'm bitter with women specifically? I think I've **** talked more men than women by far. Perhaps not?


Aren't we all a little bitter? I've seen some of your other posts, and they have a cynical tone. Maybe your outlook has changed, I don't know. Maybe I'm full of


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## TheDudeLebowski

Luminous said:


> Depends, most of the time they stay for THEIR money, not someone else's.


Speaking of being bitter with women ... Personally, I see it as kid's money. Custodial parent should get the lions share. Helping your ex helps your kids. 

The married man will sell his boat to put his kid through college. The divorced man is bitter about having to sell his boat to make child support and alimony payments.


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## TheDudeLebowski

TXTrini said:


> Aren't we all a little bitter? I've seen some of your other posts, and they have a cynical tone. Maybe your outlook has changed, I don't know. Maybe I'm full of


"If you're conscious you must be depressed, or at least cynical"

-MGMT


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## Luminous

TheDudeLebowski said:


> Speaking of being bitter with women ... Personally, I see it as kid's money. Custodial parent should get the lions share. Helping your ex helps your kids.
> 
> The married man will sell his boat to put his kid through college. The divorced man is bitter about having to sell his boat to make child support and alimony payments.


Just going off observations and many that I have spoken with in this type of situation.

Your highlighting of differences between married/divorced men, whilst a broad brush in scope, does not highlight the possibility that a divorced man might not be bitter about selling his boat as such, but that he has no control over WHERE that money goes for his child (i.e. College fund etc.)


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## SunCMars

Luminous said:


> Just going off observations and many that I have spoken with in this type of situation.
> 
> Your highlighting of differences between married/divorced men, whilst a broad brush in scope, does not highlight the possibility that a divorced man might not be bitter about selling his boat as such, but that he has no control over WHERE that money goes for his child (i.e. College fund etc.)


A man selling off his prized assets, car, boat, motorcycle, favorite golf clubs, dropping memberships, downsizing homes and lifestyles in a divorce or life crisis, can be very painful. 

Those are material things. 
Some can be replaced at a later date.

Replacing a once valuable partner, is the hardest.


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## Luminous

SunCMars said:


> A man selling off his prized assets, car, boat, motorcycle, favorite golf clubs, dropping memberships, downsizing homes and lifestyles in a divorce or life crisis, can be very painful.
> 
> Those are material things.
> Some can be replaced at a later date.
> 
> Replacing a once valuable partner, is the hardest.


I believe you may be missing the point (or I haven't properly digested your message)...

I was referring to the sacrifice that these people still make, and want to make for their kids, but there is now a middle man (or middle woman) that now gets to decide where/how those funds are allocated, and these individuals do not always act in a virtuous way, the way they probably should in matters such as these.


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## SunCMars

Luminous said:


> I believe you may be missing the point (or I haven't properly digested your message)...
> 
> I was referring to the sacrifice that these people still make, and want to make for their kids, but there is now a middle man (or middle woman) that now gets to decide where/how those funds are allocated, and these individuals do not always act in a virtuous way, the way they probably should in matters such as these.


Sure, that too.

I did that for our children, repeatedly.
No middle man, no OM.
Well, later a wayward son-in-law. He became a former SIL.

We make great sacrifices for our children.
I read somewhere that the _average_ child costs parents anywhere from 250K to 350K over a lifetime.


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## SunCMars

_The Martians_, _The Typist_ and I are back from our fishing expedition. 
We were driven off by tropical storm Zeta.
...............................................................
I came back and I found this thread!!

This thread has become a place to offset, to off-put feelings, so many raw emotions.
TJ's happened.

Worry not...

I apologize to any that got a bad outcome with her bringing this up.
Life is hard.

Relationships are hard.
Friendships are hard.
Compromise is hard.

Little Gwendolyn is an amateur in this banter.
She went back to her Dublin warren, head down, worried and smiling less.


_Are Dee-_


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## Blondilocks

Well, I figured dear Gwendolyn was channeling some of her other head mates thoughts. Did they get it out of their respective systems?


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## Luminous

Blondilocks said:


> Well, I figured dear Gwendolyn was channeling some of her other head mates thoughts. Did they get it out of their respective systems?


Jury is still out on that one...


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## SunCMars

Blondilocks said:


> Well, I figured dear Gwendolyn was channeling some of her other head mates thoughts. Did they get it out of their respective systems?


Quite an insight, that.

They all come from the same fountain.
_THRD._


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## SunCMars

Some thoughts should not be revealed.
Sensitive people take them to heart, thinking they are the inspiration for those thoughts.


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## Blondilocks

SunCMars said:


> *Quite an insight, that.*
> 
> They all come from the same fountain.
> _THRD._


LOL Just call me Sherlock. Or, as Mycroft was fond of saying "Sherly".


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## TheDudeLebowski

Blondilocks said:


> Well, I figured dear Gwendolyn was channeling some of her other head mates thoughts. Did they get it out of their respective systems?


Pretending to be a woman in order to gain a specific response that confirms their bias. Was never really a question being asked in earnest.

Arb and SunC could be best friends... 

Yet, I'm the bitter one?


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## C.C. says ...

SunCMars said:


> They all come from the same fountain.
> _THRD._


Gwendolyn took away my ignorant bliss. Curse you, Gwendolyn. May your vibrator run out of battery life.


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## TheDudeLebowski

C.C. says ... said:


> Gwendolyn took away my ignorant bliss. Curse you, Gwendolyn. May your vibrator run out of battery life.
> 
> View attachment 72347


TAM is a knife party. It's only a matter of time before you figure it out.


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## blahfridge

I’m very confused now...


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## SunCMars

..


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## TheDudeLebowski

Struck a nerve it seems.

The dearth of faith you speak, perhaps you missed it. I already said I might change my name to Emerging Misanthrope. 😋

The timing is evident. My marriage ended and my kids have been used as pawns by someone I thought was at least a good mother, if nothing else. The world has gone to **** in 2020. The true face of humanity was revealed in the chaos. in My father is dying of cancer. Friends became foes on a dime, in my time of need. In my most vulnerable state. People HERE! One that I even specifically named in my testimony. Abandoned by all I once believed to be good, even though flawed, yet still good. 

Warts indeed.


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## RandomDude

blahfridge said:


> I’m very confused now...


Only a select few with a select wavelength can ever hope to understand the contents of this thread.


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## Livvie

TheDudeLebowski said:


> TAM is a knife party. It's only a matter of time before you figure it out.


Say what?


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## TheDudeLebowski

You know what hurts? Thinking yourself as less than your entire life. When the truth hits, you are an equal. It is not because you are better than you give yourself credit for. Its because everyone is worse than you gave them credit for all along.

Still in the mud. Suddenly you wipe the dirt from your eyes only to see everyone was right there with you in the mud this whole time.

Hope ... Faith? It has not died yet. But it runs low. I still have some things to fight for. I'll keep fighting. But I'm angry. I have expressed this. I have expressed my distaste for humanity. I feel I have a right to be angry. Perhaps not?


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## SunCMars

...


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## Blondilocks

TheDudeLebowski said:


> Pretending to be a woman in order to gain a specific response that confirms their bias. Was never really a question being asked in earnest.
> 
> Arb and SunC could be best friends...
> 
> Yet, I'm the bitter one?


I don't recall Arb ever pretending to be a woman. What am I missing?


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## TheDudeLebowski

Blondilocks said:


> I don't recall Arb ever pretending to be a woman. What am I missing?


A couple of old men bitter about themselves that outwardly are bitter towards women as a response. 

Women are more forgiving of men. Until they call that man brazen...


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## Blondilocks

TheDudeLebowski said:


> A couple of old men bitter about themselves that outwardly are bitter towards women as a response.
> 
> Women are more forgiving of men. Until they call that man brazen...


Thanks for the explanation.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson

Blondilocks said:


> I don't recall Arb ever pretending to be a woman. What am I missing?


I may be mistaken but I seem to recall posts that arb did say woman, and I tried to make a mental note of it as I thought was male.

But hey. I could be wrong.


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## Andy1001

Arbitrator is a six foot three American male who made the mistake of marrying two stone cold *****es. In my four and a half years on tam I never heard him insult or belittle any member of the forum.
And I think it’s a bit ****ty of anyone mouthing off about him when he’s not around to defend himself.


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## Andy1001

You want me to defend myself. Against what, your rantings ?
You show me a post saying I had “servants as a child”.
I’ve still got your number “Dude” and your messages thanking me for my help. 
Now because I don’t agree with your self pitying bs I’m the enemy. And you insult my dead parents ?
How many more bridges are you going to burn.
Grow ****ing up.


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## Blondilocks

Andy1001 said:


> You want me to defend myself. Against what, your rantings ?
> You show me a post saying I had “servants as a child”.
> I’ve still got your number “Dude” and your messages thanking me for my help.
> Now because I don’t agree with your self pitying bs I’m the enemy. And you insult my dead parents ?
> How many more bridges are you going to burn.
> Grow ****ing up.


Am I correct in assuming this is in response to a PM? 

Remember, I told you - no good deed goes unpunished.


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## Andy1001

Blondilocks said:


> Am I correct in assuming this is in response to a PM?
> 
> Remember, I told you - no good deed goes unpunished.


No it’s in response to a post which has subsequently been deleted.
Basically because I defended Arb I was called a snake in the grass, my upbringing was mentioned and what was said was complete lies, my deceased parents were insulted, my a life and relationships were brought up in a negative way and I was told what I could do with my money. 
The post has been removed obviously by a moderator, whether at the posters request or not I don’t know.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson

Andy1001 said:


> No it’s in response to a post which has subsequently been deleted.
> Basically because I defended Arb I was called a snake in the grass, my upbringing was mentioned and what was said was complete lies, my deceased parents were insulted, my a life and relationships were brought up in a negative way and I was told what I could do with my money.
> The post has been removed obviously by a moderator, whether at the posters request or not I don’t know.


Durn, that would be harsh.


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## SunCMars

We live in troubled times, X3.

The weakest of us fall out, then fall on their sword.
The stronger get that bad feeling in their guts.

Moving to Antarctica is looking more tempting every day.
I only need to develop a taste for penguin stew.


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## Divinely Favored

SunCMars said:


> We live in troubled times, X3.
> 
> The weakest of us fall out, then fall on their sword.
> The stronger get that bad feeling in their guts.
> 
> Moving to Antarctica is looking more tempting every day.
> I only need to develop a taste for penguin stew.


Taste like chicken, with hint of fish. 😆


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## Hiner112

I didn't read all of the posts in the thread so this is probably redundant. Its also inconclusive.

There are two competing historical perspectives on this subject.

One is "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned." meaning that women are something to be feared if they've been rejected or betrayed.

The other is all of the jealousy and anxiety surrounding cuckolding, the devaluing of women who've had sex, and the historical official (multiple wives) and complicit (knowing he has sex with the secretary) polygamy.

On TAM, it seems pretty balanced. Guys saying something like "I found out she's cheating but I still love her and don't want (her) to leave" and women saying, "he's had his dalliances in the past but we stayed together [for the children / so he could pay for stuff]".

Some women seem to want to find a fixer upper, a troubled guy that they can guide into better behaviors and a better life.

Some guys want to "rescue" a woman in bad circumstances.

Women's perspective on men sometimes has to deal with a troublingly thin line between confidence and arrogance (IE are you putting up with bad behavior or appreciating someone exhibiting manly traits).

Guys often have a similar problem with the line between being a provider and being taken advantage of. Also, is the woman being caring or mothering/controlling?


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## aine

Say what? Ladies lounge? err most answers are not from "ladies" ??


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## SunCMars

Some men wish to hide behind, actually, under a woman's skirt.
Some men wish to speak on their behalf.

The better half is rarely amused.

They do not want to be one of the girls, they want to be close to the action.
And, to keep themselves in view, in case something goes....down.

Just more wishful thinking, on men's part.


_Gwendolyn-_


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## SunCMars

Men can be first, those_ bad boys_, the ladies, secondly, those _bad girls_.

The first is said, forgivingly, it being expected, and, with a smirk, this behavior is reluctantly accepted.

_Bad girls_ are thought more than naughty, they are reviled by many. 
Girls are not supposed to be fun loving.
Their treasure-chest is not to be readily shared.
No.

A sad thought, backed by most casual observers of both genders.


_The Typist-_


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## SunCMars

It is said that _time heals all wounds_, not so with the wounds ladies inflict on others.
Of both sexes.
We are never forgiven.
This is the common perception....

Ladies, more than men, are the _preferred_ target of expressed wrath. They cannot properly fight back.
Hmmm, what a misguided thought that is.

Society expects more from ladies, they are wives and mothers.
They do not have to fall far to be called out as (something less than good).

Men have ****s, therefore behaving as one is expected.

Men are seen as natty, ladies as catty when word play exercises it jaw, and bares forth its claws.


_Gwendolyn- _I came back to this thread after being painfully chased away. I need to defend* our* position on this subject.


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## SunCMars

Ladies, it seems, hate what they see in other woman.
They inwardly hate themselves for the same gendered reasons.

It is easier to hate another for the same (perceived) faults you own.
Such a convenient hate, not looking clearly at your known, hidden own.

Men do this self/other hating, also.
We all wish to own the world, not to be ever-owing.

Jealousy is that double edged blade.
It cuts fore and aft.

Ach!, both strokes draw blood and ire.


_Are Dee- _


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## BruceBanner

TheDudeLebowski said:


> Friends became foes on a dime, in my time of need.


How did they become foes?


----------

