# Distance or Personality Conflicts?



## heartbrok3n (Jun 5, 2012)

It has only been slightly more than 5 years since our marriage, and i am seriously contemplating a divorce. The only things that are stopping me is my 2 beautiful kids and the disappointment and heartache that i will bring my parents if it materializes.

We spent more than 3 of our 5 years of marriage living apart, not just in different states, but in different countries. She said she was taking the kids back to her country and live there for a year before coming back here, but she never did. I have been travelling to where they are living now for the past three years, trying to persuade her to come back home but in vain.

And if the pain of living as a 'married single man' and missing my kids isn't excruciating enough, she is now accusing me of being unfaithful and reluctant to send her money for family maintenance. She took out a mortgage that she can't afford by herself, and this was without my prior consent too. I don't mind paying for it even though that would be encouraging her to not ever considering moving back. And now with all those accusations flying at me and with her being so unappreciative, not only am i thinking of cutting her supply of money from me, but i am losing hope that this marriage will last.

The thought of losing my kids is eating me alive.


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## lamaga (May 8, 2012)

I am sorry. I would encourage you to stay far, far away from her mortgage.

I don't know about the kids, you need to see an attorney who is versed in international custody issues.

Again, this sounds heartwrenching. So sorry.


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## heartbrok3n (Jun 5, 2012)

We haven't made any contact with one another for more than two weeks now. Her mortgage repayment for June is closing in. I have made up my mind not to send her any money, to let her know that she needs me, that the kids need me.

Not sure how well it will work. Knowing her, i think it will backfire.

My attorney has referred me to another that is more experienced than she is. But she said i need not consult him until my wife and i have decided what we're to do next.

The court in her country favors women. The fact that i only get to see my kids for about 2 to 3 months a year won't help my case. The odds are against me, anyway you look at it.

I can only hope that when they're all grown, they will have the desire to see me, give me a chance to tell them my side of the story, and know that i didn't leave, but mummy took and kept them away.


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