# Update - Reconciliation



## TCSRedhead (Oct 17, 2012)

Since we see so often the disasters and train wrecks, I just wanted to post an update on our situation.

My other half (CrashandBurn) and I are doing well. We're communicating better than I can ever remember in our marriage. During the holidays, we've had visits from both the daughters (19 and 21 yo) and it was really wonderful to be a family and enjoying each other's company.

The support and advice from people here has been absolutely invaluable and I just cannot thank you enough.


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## daisygirl 41 (Aug 5, 2011)

This is great news.
Lovely to hear a positive update.
Hope things continue to go well for you!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ChangingMe (Oct 3, 2012)

So glad to hear it! Keep up the good work, both of you!


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## walkonmars (Aug 21, 2012)

Red, I'm glad that you and Crash are at a place that gives your relationship a chance to really blossom. I hope Crash continues to develop his talent. It takes time for things like that to take off. And even if it doesn't become a multinational enterprise, he can find fulfillment in his work.


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## Acabado (May 13, 2012)

Great news, redhead!
Thanks for the update.


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## bfree (Sep 30, 2012)

Awesome. I think you guy are great. I wish all good things for the both of you.


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## TCSRedhead (Oct 17, 2012)

Thanks folks - he's definitely continuing and has a show coming up in the spring that we're pretty excited about as well as a feature upcoming on an internet tv show. 

It's definitely a work in progress but worth every effort.


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## AngryandUsed (Jun 23, 2011)

Red,
What in your opinion is the major contributing factor in R?

AU


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## Mrs_Mathias (Nov 19, 2012)

So glad to hear things are going well for you!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## goodwife4 (Jan 7, 2013)

just wondering how long did it take to get to this point ??

its been 2 yrs since i found out about EA


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## TCSRedhead (Oct 17, 2012)

AngryandUsed said:


> Red,
> What in your opinion is the major contributing factor in R?
> 
> AU


He and I were really good friends for years before we ever became romantically involved. It took me a while to pull my head out of my behind but I finally came to realize not only was I losing my husband, I was losing that friend as well.


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## TCSRedhead (Oct 17, 2012)

goodwife4 said:


> just wondering how long did it take to get to this point ??
> 
> its been 2 yrs since i found out about EA


It's been over 16 months since D-Day. That said, we did everything wrong so this process definitely took a long time. I'd say that the solid process of R really began about 4 1/2 months ago.


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## sandc (Dec 15, 2011)

Just now discovering your threads. Just want to say I admire all the work and effort you have put in to rebuilding the marriage. Even though it hurts me to read what WS's have done to their families (and themselves) I really respect people like yourself who put in so much work to rebuild. You are both lucky people.


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## cj9947 (Jul 9, 2011)

Congrats....


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## Ovid (Oct 11, 2012)

Very happy for you two. Keep it up


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## Rand OmGuy (Apr 1, 2013)

Red, 
Very good to hear. It makes me feel more comfortable about the R process my wife and i are in. Thought it is all very fresh for me, we are working together good and i know we'll have bumps along the way, but seeing that you and Crash are in a very positive place gives me a lot of hope. 

Hope all continues to go well! You both deserve it!!!


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## TCSRedhead (Oct 17, 2012)

Thank you for the well wishes. I'm still awed and amazed by his love and hope to continue to be the wife he deserves to have by his side. 

His texts to me today (he's out of town) were sweet and filled with the love I thought I had destroyed. The one thing that stands out the most is him telling me that he knew he was important to me even when I had forgotten. 

He's right. I know this is part of why I come back here. I hope and pray that there are other people I can help through this disastrous experience.


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## StarGazer101 (Jan 26, 2013)

Amongst all the heartache on here it really does me good to see that there is hope. I am very happy for you both - I hope you continue to go from strength to strength.


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## sandc (Dec 15, 2011)

Okay, I have to admit, I've never been betrayed but, Stonewall, what mind movies can a BS have from an EA? They didn't actually do anything physical. Would it just be the pictures or ??

Red, has your H had mind movies?

Genuinely curious.


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## TCSRedhead (Oct 17, 2012)

I'm not sure about mind movies. He's never described that to be honest. He has had bad days in the past where he remembers the pictures that were sent. 

I do make sure to take things a lot further and raunchier with him than I've ever done/been with anyone else so I think that's definitely made a big difference.

I'll definitely make sure to keep an eye out for it though. I tend to be pretty sensitive to his moods so when he's seeming down or upset, I turn up the attention to him as much as possible.


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