# Getting in shape, what works?



## Lostwouthim (Jun 17, 2012)

I know alot of us on here have decided to get ourselves in better shape than when we were with our spouses. 
What has worked for you? 
Gym, walks, weight lifting just curious. 
I am also wondering if anyone can guide me into what kind of exercise mix I should be doing to lose the weight initially? 
Should I focus on cardio and then after I shed some pounds move to muscle building to get some definition?


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## UpnDown (May 4, 2012)

You are going to get so many different responses it won't be funny. It's like a religion.

I was 285lbs 4 months ago, I'm now 240-245lbs. Although I have lost a lot of weight, my muscle mass also plays a factor, so I'm sure I've lost more.

Hated the treadmill, started on the elliptical.

Stopped eating a lot of junk food (which was easily done because ex was the one who wanted it most of the time).

Don't skip breakfast. Just puts your body in starving mode to start the day.

Google basic weightlifting.

Currently my routine is somewhat like this;

Day 1 - Cardio

Day 2 - Warm up Cardio w/ Chest & Triceps

Day 3 - Cardio

Day 4 - Warm up Cardio Back, Shoulders and Biceps

Day 5 - Cardio / Legs

Take breaks in between whenever I feel I need it.


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## jdlash (Jun 18, 2012)

Do cardio for sure, but don't forget to mix in weight lifting. Combining both will get you the best results.


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## UpnDown (May 4, 2012)

Just noticed, you're a woman .. lol.

Maybe SVL can help ya out then!


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## worrieddad (Nov 3, 2011)

If you are just starting out, I'd recommend doing something you like to do - that way, you'll be more apt to stick with it. Myself, I have never lost my army mentality where no workout is a good one unless I'm absolutely kicking my own behind - a typical daily workout for me is at least 30 minutes of hard cardio, plus 45 mins of weights - no talking, cellphone usage, lallygagging or the rest of it...just the way I was trained.

If feeling like you are about to drop is not your bag but you don't mind the gym, I'd still recommend something similar...a good session of cardio (but doesn't have to be to the extreme), followed by weights that use your major muscle groups - just do light weights but lots of repetitions - will serve a dual purpose as to keep the earlier cardio going but also start to build some definition.

Really though, anything to change your lifestyle a little bit towards exercising more will help, as will sensible eating...since my separation began, I've been eating out a whole lot less (very rarely these days), and just controlling my portions - its not a diet, just sensible. I should imagine up there in Oregon hill walking is very popular - heck, maybe you could even join a group or something...meet some new people while doing something energetic - would maybe keep your interest and and make some new friends while working out! Good luck


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## UpnDown (May 4, 2012)

Probably one of the biggest suggestions I could give, would be to keep it at a pace you think you could do everyday if not every other day. Last thing you want to do is burn yourself out so bad that you can't get motivated to do it again.


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## SoVeryLost (May 14, 2012)

What works...it's really pretty simple.

You need to: start small, do things you enjoy, and change your way of thinking. Diets don't work. You need to change your lifestyle.

The biggest mistake people (mostly women) make is trying to starve themselves. Google "how many calories I need to eat" and a ton of free websites will pop up. Plug in your height, weight, and age, and it'll kick out the number of calories you need to maintain your current weight. Take that number and subtract 500. That's how many calories you NEED to eat a day. Just by restricting your calories by 500 a day from what you need, you'll lose a pound a week. There are 3,500 calories in a pound. It's simple math. But DO NOT eat less than that. It's hard to wrap your mind around - you want to think, "if I eat less, I'll lose weight faster." Wrong. If you eat less than that number of calories, your body *will* think it's starving and it will hold onto every single calorie you do consume and store it as fat. It's completely counter-productive. To lose weight, you have to eat.

You'll read and hear a lot about proteins, fats, carbs, but if you're just starting out, the most important thing you need to focus on is caloric intake. And don't eat a bunch of 100 calorie packs of that processed junk. Make them good calories. Fresh fruit and vegetables, lean meats (chicken, turkey, and fish - especially salmon), whole grains, etc. Give your body some actual fuel. The closer you can get to a food's original form the better. Good rule of thumb if you are eating something processed? If it has more than 10 ingredients in it, skip it. Find a healthier choice.

Write down what you eat throughout the day. Keep a bank of how many calories you've consumed. Sounds hoky and like a lot of work, but being accountable for your calories throughout the day helps more than you think it would. In my personal opinion, successful weight loss is 75% diet.

Now, when it comes to exercise, if you're not doing anything right now, any kind of exercise will be good for you. Find something you will realistically do. Like Up said, if you don't like the treadmill, do the elliptical. If you don't have either and don't want to join a gym, walk outside. Do stair steps at home. When you're starting out the most important thing to do is just get your body moving. Don't worry about strength training right now. You don't want to overwhelm and shock your body. And remember...you're not going to define any muscles that have fat on top of them. Work on getting rid of the fat first.

That being said, strength training can be more effective than cardio, for the simple fact that it keeps your heart rate elevated longer than simple cardio does. When you are doing cardio, though, don't try to push yourself as hard as you can go. Look up what your target heart rate should be. Aim to keep your heart rate at 80% of that range. You'll get better results than if you go at it as hard as you can, guaranteed.

Start off with small goals. Don't say - I want to lose 30 lbs. Make your first goal 5 lbs. Once you've reached that, your next goal can be another 5 lbs., and so on. That way you're not going to get discouraged. You will fluctuate. You will gain weight some days, not lose any for a week, and then plummet the next. It's all normal. Stick with it, even on the days you feel discouraged. Switch up your diet and routine every 8 weeks to keep your body guessing.

And most importantly, remember...it takes 21 days to form a habit. Give yourself time to adjust to a healthier lifestyle. See it through. The change in your diet and the increase in your exercise will not only have monumental health benefits, but they'll have amazing mental and emotional benefits as well. There's a reason they say "you are what you eat." Your body functions on what you put into it. Make your body happy, and your mind will follow.


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## lulubelle (Jun 28, 2012)

i used to work as a diatician, and for most women about 1200 calories per day is best for weight loss. try to get in at least 30 minutes of something per day, even if its just a walk. if you go to the gym, try to get in some cardio and weights. i like to do 30min cardio, 30 min weights, and another 30 min cardio. the food part is hard for me. i've had stress induced anorexia on and off my whole life, so i'm still working on that part.


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## Vanton68 (Feb 5, 2012)

Why not do P90x or Insanity? They show results in a short period of time (assuming your diet is relatively clean, and your calories are adjusted for weight loss. Most likely one of your friends might have one of those DVDs collecting dust somewhere. It takes all of the guesswork out of your workout.


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

3 miles walk and run daily. Bleachers- 15 sets. Weight training 4x a week. No sugar, junk food or glutens. Stay away from the booze. Beer will put pounds on you like you cannot believe.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Lostwouthim (Jun 17, 2012)

It's funny you mentioned P90x! I have done some of the workouts from P90x on and off, but I find I can't adapt to the diet. But that was also when I was in a different mind set, I loved eating CARBS. But since I found out I will be getting a D I've tried to stay away from all that sh*t I was shoving in my mouth previously. So far, so good. I did join a gym though and tomorrow will be my first day going to a gym in about 14 years. But I still like P90x legs and back and the cardio dvd's so I may use that when I don't want to go to the gym. I'm also looking into the fitness classes that the gym offers and might try a few of those to.


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## Dustball (May 16, 2012)

10-20 minutes of cardio and an hour of weights did wonders on me. I was in better shape after pregnancy than I was at 15.

Here's something you won't read anywhere else. Asides from eating properly, no fried foods, no soda (that includes light sodas, they don't work), drink plenty of water, blablabla, I noticed when I lived in the US that people have such busy schedules that most people make supper their big meal. They eat steak, mashed potatoes, gravy, the whole thing, and then sit in front of the tv or the computer the rest of the evening. All those calories are not being put to use, and they get stored, and since many don't have a decent breakfast, the body will get used to store what it recieved during supper to make up for hours of fasting and crappy breakfasts.
The most important meal of the day should be breakfast, you need the fuel in your body to get you through the day. A light snack at midday (no cookies or such, maybe an apple, orange, etc), a good meal for lunch, and supper should be light, fruit and yogurt, salad, etc. Sometimes the when and how you eat can make a difference.


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## Lostwouthim (Jun 17, 2012)

UpnDown said:


> Just noticed, you're a woman .. lol.
> 
> Maybe SVL can help ya out then!


Yes, I most definitely am a woman!


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## Vanton68 (Feb 5, 2012)

Lostwouthim said:


> It's funny you mentioned P90x! I have done some of the workouts from P90x on and off, but I find I can't adapt to the diet. But that was also when I was in a different mind set, I loved eating CARBS. But since I found out I will be getting a D I've tried to stay away from all that sh*t I was shoving in my mouth previously. So far, so good. I did join a gym though and tomorrow will be my first day going to a gym in about 14 years. But I still like P90x legs and back and the cardio dvd's so I may use that when I don't want to go to the gym. I'm also looking into the fitness classes that the gym offers and might try a few of those to.


I love carbs too, but not as much as seeing my abs.


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## worrieddad (Nov 3, 2011)

SoVeryLost said:


> Start off with small goals. Don't say - I want to lose 30 lbs. Make your first goal 5 lbs. Once you've reached that, your next goal can be another 5 lbs., and so on. That way you're not going to get discouraged. You will fluctuate. You will gain weight some days, not lose any for a week, and then plummet the next. It's all normal. Stick with it, even on the days you feel discouraged. Switch up your diet and routine every 8 weeks to keep your body guessing.
> 
> And most importantly, remember...it takes 21 days to form a habit. Give yourself time to adjust to a healthier lifestyle. See it through. The change in your diet and the increase in your exercise will not only have monumental health benefits, but they'll have amazing mental and emotional benefits as well. There's a reason they say "you are what you eat." Your body functions on what you put into it. Make your body happy, and your mind will follow.


These are very good points...especially the weight loss bit. I think far too many people get hung up on watching the pounds go down, and when they don't, even perhaps just for a day or two, they get discouraged and sometimes even quit altogether. As per the second paragraph here, a better goal IMHO is a lifestyle change...if the aim is to get fitter and healthier, the pounds will usually follow, or they will convert to muscle mass and give you definition.

Me for instance, my weight is generally very stable...for as long as I can remember I've been 6' and 200lbs +/- 10lb. But at that weight, I can either start to look and feel a bit tubby and lethargic (as I was trending about a year ago), or I can be really well toned and fit (as per now).


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## SoVeryLost (May 14, 2012)

The biggest challenge in weight loss is not a physical one. It's a mental one. Accept that the changes you need to make you need to make for the rest of your life. That's why diets don't work. They're not sustainable. 

I love Twinkies and pizza and pop as much as the next person. But just remember that once you've swallowed it...the taste sensation is gone. And you'll likely feel a quick high from the carbs and the sugar, but once it wears off you'll be tired, your body will feel heavy, and you may even have an upset tummy. Had you chosen a salad with grilled chicken, an apple, and a bottle of water, think of how you would feel. 

I recommend the documentary, "Food, Inc." to just about everyone. Will give you a better look at what you're really putting into your body. 

One body, one life.


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

Set a reasonable goal of no more than a few pounds every week. Maybe 2 lbs but consistent so that you're -8lbs or so every month. 

Read food labels. Even a 12oz class of OJ has about 200 cals.

Don't think that because you lost some weight you owe yourself a treat. 

Personal trainers, FWIW, in the US are not allowed and not certified to offer nutritional advice or meal planning.


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## SoVeryLost (May 14, 2012)

Runs like Dog said:


> Personal trainers, FWIW, in the US are not allowed and not certified to offer nutritional advice or meal planning.


Every personal trainer I've ever had has done meal planning with me. How can you properly help someone as a personal trainer if you don't address the biggest component necessary for weight loss?

Where did you hear this? If it's true, I wonder if my personal trainer knows this.


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## UpnDown (May 4, 2012)

I'm sure there are different 'levels' of personal trainers right? Ones that went to school etc for all of it and others who did it on there own and turned trainers.

At my gym I see a lot of those types, people I knew were just working out years back and now are trainers.


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## SoVeryLost (May 14, 2012)

That's true, Up. I guess if you go the route of a personal trainer, be sure you know what you're getting. I took a strength training boot camp course a few months back, and afterwards the instructor asked me if I'd want to teach a class on my own. Could I advertise myself as a personal trainer in that case? I suppose so, but what a rip off.

Everyone is trying to make a quick buck these days. Just do your research on someone before handing them over any money. Again, that's if you go this route.

Like Up said earlier, everyone has a different opinion about what works and what doesn't. Listen to your body and how it reacts to whatever you try.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## norajane (Feb 7, 2012)

I have really good results with HIIT - High Intensity Interval Training. 

It can be done a lot of ways, but the gist is to warm up with whatever exercise you're doing, and then do intervals where you are going at full intensity, followed by a period where you slow down and catch your breath, then do another high intensity interval, then slow down again, rinse, repeat, for maybe 25 minutes.

If you were a runner, you'd do something like sprint for 30 seconds, then jog for 2 minutes until your heart rate goes down, then sprint again for 30 seconds, then jog again, etc. If you're on an elliptical or other machine, you can increase your speed or the tension on the machine so you work hard those 30 seconds.

You can do this with any cardio type activity. It really, really kicks your ass and you get it done in less than 30 minutes. Works like a charm to get your metabolism up all day and to drop pounds. Later, you can add weight training to build up some muscle, which will also increase your resting metabolism.

I try to do it every other day, but skip it if I'm out and about and doing other things, like swimming in the summer or biking or whatever. It's good to mix up your activities so you have some fun, too!

The other big things is you really have to be careful with food. Exercise alone will only get you so far. You know what your specific bad habits are with food, so you have to change them. If you overeat, then you have to be careful with portion control. If you snack a lot, you have to change your snacks to something healthy and maybe space out your meals so you are eating smaller, more frequent meals. If you eat at night in front of the tv, turn it off! At the very least, get a DVR so you can fast forward past all the food commercials in the evening which have the psychological effect of making you want food. If you're a potato chip lover, learn to become an unbuttered popcorn lover. You can't get away from needing to change bad food habits, you can't.


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## UpnDown (May 4, 2012)

I think I remember reading somewhere that diet and sleep is like 80% of the battle.

You will hinder yourself if you don't try to get at least 7-8 hours of sleep, anything below 6 .. you are really just not giving your body that time to recharge and rebuild that muscle.

I used to drink about 2 or 3 cans of pop a day, I have cut down immensely. I can go days without drinking one .. so much sugar. Even the juice etc, just look at the sugar. Insane.

Water and 1% milk (I cannot go below 1% lol) is all I pretty much drink, unless I take the kids out and I will share a pop with them.

One of the hardest things for me since all of this, is that I don't have much junk food around, or snacks / candy. Kids do not like that, say I have nothing in my fridge (compared to my in laws where the ex is living .. this is true, lol).

Eat with a big plate? Try going to a smaller one, I now eat from the same size plates my kids eat from. lol.

Also, give yourself a cheat DAY! One day where you can eat this or that. Once you get your metabolism going steady again, it won't hurt you. It can even be beneficial because it will make your body burn that off.


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

SoVeryLost said:


> Every personal trainer I've ever had has done meal planning with me. How can you properly help someone as a personal trainer if you don't address the biggest component necessary for weight loss?
> 
> Where did you hear this? If it's true, I wonder if my personal trainer knows this.


My son, who has a masters in exercise rehab and is fully certified, and runs a hospital program for geriatric and post heart surgery exercise rehab tells me this. Nutritionists receive 6 months more educational training, must complete a different internship and pass a series of exams which are in fact different from those of exercise rehab specialists. Closer to what a nurse does. People violate those rules all the time but there you have it.


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## Matt1720 (May 7, 2012)

If you're hungry, drink a big glass of water. If you're still hungry in ten minutes then you actually need to eat. Often, you are just dehydrated.


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## Lostwouthim (Jun 17, 2012)

Vanton68 said:


> I love carbs too, but not as much as seeing my abs.


Yeah, I want to see my abs again and be hot like I used to be! An get my A$$ and legs back in order too! Actually I just want to feel and look hot and rub it in his face whenever I have to see him! But all for myself!


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## UpnDown (May 4, 2012)

Lostwouthim said:


> Yeah, I want to see my abs again and be hot like I used to be! An get my A$$ and legs back in order too! Actually I just want to feel and look hot and rub it in his face whenever I have to see him! But all for myself!


Lol. I hear ya.

When we first met I was 195 lbs and pretty beefy, she used to say how much she loved my shoulders and the 'valley' in my chest.

So I make sure to work out my shoulders extra frickin hard, lol. One day .. one day.

It's great motivation, because in the end it's all for me anyways.

On Wednesday my buddy was toast (to his credit he is a machine, bikes to and from work everyday, plays softball, and in 2 ball hockey leagues) but I kept going .. which made him keep going because he didn't want the fat guy to show him up. Haha.

Which is all good to me, another great motivator.


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## Vanton68 (Feb 5, 2012)

Lostwouthim said:


> Yeah, I want to see my abs again and be hot like I used to be! An get my A$$ and legs back in order too! Actually I just want to feel and look hot and rub it in his face whenever I have to see him! But all for myself!


Good for you! Take before and After pics to see how far you progress!


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## YinPrincess (Jul 31, 2011)

I don't get to exercise much anymore now that I have a small child, but when I did I'd hit the gym 3x a week - alternating between weight lifting and muscle toning, then cardio - usually the tread or elliptical. It's important to alternate and not let your body plateau in routine.

Now, I watch what I eat, my latest thing has been mono-dieting. (Eating only fruits, veggies and water). This takes a LOT of discipline, but it can benefit you in the short term. Week on/week off, eat sensibly when you're on your off week.

I also do one hour of yoga a day. This keeps me toned, balanced and flexible.

I hike mountains, (or the volcanoes nearby), at least once a week and bike-ride when possible.

You will have to experiment with a few different things to see what works for you, but I hope I've given you some ideas! 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## UpnDown (May 4, 2012)

For some reason, I've always wanted to try yoga .. lol.


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## Lostwouthim (Jun 17, 2012)

UpnDown said:


> Lol. I hear ya.
> 
> When we first met I was 195 lbs and pretty beefy, she used to say how much she loved my shoulders and the 'valley' in my chest.
> 
> ...


Yeah, I'm going to work really frickin hard and get the 6 pack and a slammin behind, and then I'm gonna rub it in his face! Cause he won't be getting anymore of me!


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## YinPrincess (Jul 31, 2011)

UpnDown said:


> For some reason, I've always wanted to try yoga .. lol.


A lot of people make fun of it, but it's actually VERY challenging. 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## sadsoul101 (Oct 18, 2011)

What works? Planet Fitness or some other similar type gym...all you really need is elliptical, treadmill & stretching. Run on that treadmill...when life hands you divorce, you must start running!


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## Mothra777 (Apr 10, 2012)

I do a 10km intensive and hilly bike ride every second day. When I first started the 180 it took me 38 mins and yesterday I had it down to 28 mins.

I have also been doing Tony Horton's Power90 daily and the Hollywood Trainer Ab Blast every second day.

So far I have lost 10kg and am really starting to see the results as far as muscle tone is concerned and I am generally feeling much fitter. I still have a bit to go to get down to my ideal weight but I will get there.

Whatever method you choose - make sure the exercise is something that you enjoy otherwise you will lose interest quickly.


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## kd123 (Jun 18, 2012)

after H left couldnt eat for 2 months dropped weight quickly. but I started walking and using a treadmill. Helped me deal with the stress of it. 3rd month I hired a personal trainer to tone and define. 6 months later I have lost 30 lbs. a size zero and rocking a hard fab bod!!! it helped with the stress, depression, and sleep problems. the new body helps with the self esteem and confidence. Just get out there and start moving!!! eat clean!!!!


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## Lostwouthim (Jun 17, 2012)

Yeah, I've dropped 20lbs in the last 3 weeks since H told me he wanted a D, not the healthy way to do it. 
I started working out daily as of Friday- 2 hrs at gym - treadmill, stationary bike, eliptical, upper body weight machines.
Saturday- 2 hrs at gym. 1/2 "dancing" cardio class, treadmill, rowing machine, & some kind of machine liking an eliptical. I actually remembered to grab my heart rate monitor, after all that I had burned 1800 calories. That made me excited and very hopeful for the future! Now I have to build that habit up. 
I'm still having trouble eating, I really need to go to the store tomorrow and find something that sounds good! Wish me luck I'm hoping to do a long walk with my mom tomorrow and then doing yoga in the evening.


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## Emma1981 (Apr 29, 2010)

Vanton68 said:


> I love carbs too, but not as much as seeing my abs.



Agreed! I am thankful I have been in shape before my marriage, during my marriage and now going into separation - it's the only thing that's ever been consistent in my life.

OP - find your maintenance calories and subtract 300-500 calories depending. You don't need to eat "clean" but you do need to track what you are eating. Calories in vs calories out is what it boils down to - also, don't kill yourself with cardio - lift weights, do some cardio, track what you are eating and boom!


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