# what are signs of bi curious husband



## mrs confused (Jul 25, 2011)

almost 8 years of a roller coaster marriage. i have my concerns.
first happend when we started dating. he took me to a party after an hour he left me there to get beer w a married man. i was seeing there glances all night and even found him knocking on the bathroom door saying "its me open up". (he didn't know i was listening in the next room, but my guy did). for hours i watched in disbelief. when getting into the car to finally leave, the passenger seat was reclined all the way back. fast forward 2 years on a camping trip, more suspitions.
saturday night we went to a party, being as hott as it was, he went the car to sit in the ac. my friend told me she saw him drive off with a strang guy. when they returned, they were talking by themselves and that 'feeling' crept back in. having issues that i was mad at myself for ignoring it so many years past i walked right up to them, put my arms around my husband and said hello. he didn't make eye contact of even give me a second look or want anything to do w me. (mind you im a beautiful italian woman) for the next hour i watched this guy repeatedly try to make eye contact w my husband and made sure he put himself in the best possible position to have some form of comunication. i told my husband i saw what was going on and he blew up when we left...."IM NOT A ******" he became so angry and pissed off that i accused him again that he threatned to hurt me and called me all sorts of names. he says he was defending his manhood........help me make sence of this.....is he bi? should i look into this further? should i let it go, i saw what i saw and it made me feel uncomfortable.
oh yeah, in bed we were talking about fantacies, guess what his was??? yep getting another GUY into the mix.


----------



## EvanderS (Jul 1, 2011)

I don't know what the signs are of being bi... 

but I do know the sign of a cover-up. And being reactive like that says there is something going on.

If he's not willing to be truthful with you then you got a problem.


----------



## Hicks (Jan 14, 2011)

Why don't you ask him to take a lie detector test. If he answers anything but YES, it means he is Bi or Gay.


----------



## mrs confused (Jul 25, 2011)

so we talked last night. after he calmed down a bit a recapped IN DETAIL the things i witnessed in the past. i asked him what reason in the world could be that the front seal was reclined so many years ago......no response. i asked him why he said he wanted another man, he said cause he wanted to watch me blow another guy and thats all (as if that's ok) i did perform this act for him on a dildo....now he says you fullfilled that fantacy so i don't need another guy. i also mentioned to him that he has no clue what to do with a womans body....i NEVER get 4play or anything that will turn me on. its ok im horney lick it and stick then have jack rabbit sex.....sorry but woman want so much more and HE HAS NO CLUE. my reationality for this is being the captain of the football team and the hockey star etc he never had to "work at it" the girls would throw themselves at him cause of his good looks so he never had to please a woman and now im paying for it. he really has no clue how to please me, he says bull**** ive had sex w too many woman in my life to not know what im doing....i know what im doing and them proceeds to do something and i just roll my eyes....my sex life sux.....another sign of bi?? thanks for answering and helping me vent this in an anonomys was as who could i really discuss this with???


----------



## mrs confused (Jul 25, 2011)

a lie detector test is an awsome idea i doubt highly he will agree.....he mentioned he shouldnt have to defend is masculinity and im just gonna have to get past this..... i said i did get past it for years.....well until it all happened last saturday again......that cat and mouse game of glances ewwwwwww


----------



## Hicks (Jan 14, 2011)

Yeah, if he doesnt' agree, you tell him that you have your answer, and then you operate accordingly.

Regarding any subject in life, when a person becomes defensive and says things like "you should trust me", "I shouldnt have to prove it"... this means that the accuser is correct.


----------



## Lea2407 (Jul 14, 2011)

> i told my husband i saw what was going on and he blew up when we left...."IM NOT A ******" he became so angry and pissed off that i accused him again that *he threatned to hurt me and called me all sorts of names*. he says he was defending his manhood........help me make sence of this.....is he bi? should i look into this further? should i let it go, i saw what i saw and it made me feel uncomfortable.


Whether or not your husband is gay, bi, or straight, you don't deserve to be treated like this. This is not a healthy relationship. 

You definitely don't want it to escalate to the point where he feels he needs to "demonstrate" his masculinity on you. My advice would be to get out of this, at least until he can get some help and sort out his feelings and how he deals with them.


----------



## Stonewall (Jul 5, 2011)

Lea2407 said:


> Whether or not your husband is gay, bi, or straight, you don't deserve to be treated like this. This is not a healthy relationship.
> 
> You definitely don't want it to escalate to the point where he feels he needs to "demonstrate" his masculinity on you. My advice would be to get out of this, at least until he can get some help and sort out his feelings and how he deals with them.


I agree.


----------



## sinnister (Dec 5, 2010)

Sounds gay. Sorry.


----------



## SKN (Jul 29, 2011)

Sounds like you, need to make a stand and be ready to move on for both your sakes. He's living a lie and endangering your mental health, having to live with his constant lies and deceit making you believe you are crazy. And he is endangering your sexual health! Get tested. Ask for his tests! It's your right! He may be bi! So be it, however let him know its not just his dignity he is jeopardizing but your health! When we get lost in this other world, we don't see the element of casualties.
It's what stopped me in my spiral. For me men required less emotional requirements. Women are still far better but I didn't have to feel guilty for getting a BJ from a guy! And they didn't ever embellish the secret! They have just as big of fear of being exposed as a queer!


----------

