# first timer



## fuzben (Dec 31, 2012)

I have been married to my wife for 13 years I am 52 and she is 42 no kids just a dog and cat.I always said I would not get married til I had a job that I could take care of us .I have lived next door to my mother for some time before we got married and it seemed like the best place to stay my wife and mother got along great for the longest time but my mom is kinda like the mom from every one loves Raymond not that she would come over unannounced all the time just once in a while but she could say some of those passive aggressive things .My wife has had a tougher life and childhood than mine was even put in a foster home for a short time.My good job lasted only 4years and the plant closed I have not been able to find one ever that good again through I still try.I then lost my last job about 6 months ago and have been living on unemployment since.We never had to pay rent or even the tax on our house and we had a family cottage we went to a lot in the summertime.My mother has went so far to help us that she brought us a used van,New washer dryer,and helped with food.I have been employed the hole time expect for some operations that I've had to have but I still had some money comming in.My wife has had a harder time of it she did have a back operation so her options are limited as are mine .she went back to school and got a degree in medical billing and coding but still can't land a job.we have never had I physical fight and I still love her with all my hart.now my mom wants to sell the cottage and my wife has called her a money hungry ***** and has went back to her mom's and is talking divorce there is always more to the story I've never done this kind of thing over the internet so any suggestions


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## Deejo (May 20, 2008)

Made this discovery in my very own failed marriage.

The value of your marriage is never tested during good times, it's the bad times that determine what kind of foundation you have.

People deal with adversity in one of two ways, fight or flight.
My ex-wife chose flight, so it appears has your spouse. She wants it 'solved', but isn't much interested in working at the solution.

I want a fighter for a partner. What kind of partner do you want?


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## fuzben (Dec 31, 2012)

I have always was able to pay our bill's but if we both could be working it would have been a lot easier on our financial stuff.I can't help that I inherited this house without it we would have been homeless a while back.I never got violent throwing things and all that or pushing her around and the vows say for richer or poorer in good times or bad.I always thought she had it pretty good out of the 13 years of marriage she has worked maby 3years we are just working class people never made more than 35000 a year and that was 10 years ago.all I know is I still love her and miss herher.


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