# Is it appropriate for me to have sex with my wife while she's sleeping?



## Jack I (Nov 23, 2012)

I have wondered about this for a while.How appropriate is this?I've never actually had sex my wife while she was sleeping but I've thought about it at times.Lately I seem to be fantasizing about it more.Has any wife or husband here ever had this experience?If so,what was it like?


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

Dunno...I sleep soundly!

What does your wife think about it? I used to love being woken up to a stiff one and fingers and tongues.


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## pidge70 (Jan 17, 2011)

That's just disturbing.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Thunder7 (Jan 2, 2013)

I asked my wife how she felt about a quickie last night. She said, 'Do I have to be awake for it?'. Yeah, preferably.


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## FrenchFry (Oct 10, 2011)

Prior consent please. Please for the love of god get enthusiastic prior consent.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## mablenc (Feb 26, 2013)

This question sure gets asked a lot lately


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## Thunder7 (Jan 2, 2013)

FrenchFry said:


> Prior consent please. Please for the love of god get enthusiastic prior consent.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


See my 'yeah, preferably' response above.


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

mablenc said:


> This question sure gets asked a lot lately


It's a fantasy common with men. They get to do what they want without worrying about her response, her reaction, her pleasure.

What I don't understand is how is sleeping sex different from "corpse" sex?


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

If you do it without her consent, it's rape.

Ask her what she thinks about this and if it's ok with her?

Me? If all was ok between my and my husband it would not bother me. I'd probably wake up an join in. 

But if I was tired or ill.. then he'd have to stop if I said stop.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Anon Pink said:


> It's a fantasy common with men. They get to do what they want without worrying about her response, her reaction, her pleasure.
> 
> What I don't understand is how is sleeping sex different from "corpse" sex?


She's still breathing and warm..


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## 40isthenew20 (Jul 12, 2012)

I often wake up in the middle of the night like a steam pipe. But I know that if I even begin the hinting process, it will be thwarted with a push away and complaints. But there have been a handful of times when my wife wakes up and begins to give me signals. A mere second or two later, I am all in. 

Why isn't it reciprocal?


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## Jack I (Nov 23, 2012)

pidge70 said:


> That's just disturbing.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Why?


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Jack I said:


> Why?


Because you want to have sex with someone at a point when they cannot consent to the sex. 

And you want to have sex with a body that just lays there and is not involved.

These things are disturbing.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

:scratchhead:

I don't get how one is supposed to get off over a dead fish. I dumped dead fishes in the past for a reason, and now you say you prefer your wife to be a dead fish? What? 

Curious tis all =/


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## mineforever (Jan 31, 2013)

40isthenew20 said:


> I often wake up in the middle of the night like a steam pipe. But I know that if I even begin the hinting process, it will be thwarted with a push away and complaints. But there have been a handful of times when my wife wakes up and begins to give me signals. A mere second or two later, I am all in.
> 
> Why isn't it reciprocal?


I love middle of the night sex or early morning sex! Only prerequisite is he make sure I am turned on "wet" enough to have PIV. I enjoy waking him up to a bj and hj as well.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Jack I (Nov 23, 2012)

RandomDude said:


> :scratchhead:
> 
> you say you prefer your wife to be a dead fish? What?
> 
> Curious tis all =/


I never said that I prefer this kind of sex.I said that I fantasize about it.There are reasons why this is a popular fantasy.


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## Jack I (Nov 23, 2012)

EleGirl said:


> Because you want to have sex with someone at a point when they cannot consent to the sex.
> 
> And you want to have sex with a body that just lays there and is not involved.
> 
> These things are disturbing.


I don't think I could see myself getting on top of my wife and having sex with her in her sleep without giving her any indication at all that I wanted to do so.I would probably ask her if it was okay first,then at some point one night,have sex with her.But outright doing it without making a single mention of it before?I couldn't see it.


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## Catherine602 (Oct 14, 2010)

Anon Pink said:


> It's a fantasy common with men. They get to do what they want without worrying about her response, her reaction, her pleasure.
> 
> What I don't understand is how is sleeping sex different from "corpse" sex?


:lol::rofl:


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## Jack I (Nov 23, 2012)

Catherine602 said:


> :lol::rofl:


What's your take on the subject?


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## Catherine602 (Oct 14, 2010)

Jack if you ask I don't see a problem. If my husband wanted, I would try, just to see what it is like. Why not? If we both didn't like it, we wouldn't do it again. 

Just tell her its a fantasy that you'd like to try.


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## MissScarlett (May 22, 2013)

I do think you should ask ahead of time. I would be fine with it, though. In fact I think I would like to wake up like that.

As an aside, H has encouraged me to do this with a blow job. However I cant get over the fear he would pee in my mouth if he was asleep when I started. Just to note - I am fine with oral. I'm not stingy with it. The pee thing is only a fear if he was asleep. 

Uh, lets see - I might have seen a little porn with this sleep thing. I mean obviosly the woman was just pretending to be asleep. It might have appealed to me a bit. I think because it relieved any of the responsibility of sex. There was no burden of being reciprocal. No communication needed - whitch is something I'm having to work on right now (communicating and it is uncomfortable.) Perhaps this registers me as a deviant though. I don't know.

Lastly I should not post here when I have been drinking.


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## Jack I (Nov 23, 2012)

MissScarlett said:


> I do think you should ask ahead of time. I would be fine with it, though. In fact I think I would like to wake up like that.
> 
> As an aside, H has encouraged me to do this with a blow job. However I cant get over the fear he would pee in my mouth if he was asleep when I started. Just to note - I am fine with oral. I'm not stingy with it. The pee thing is only a fear if he was asleep.
> 
> ...


Good stuff Scarlett


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## larry.gray (Feb 21, 2011)

FrenchFry said:


> Prior consent please. Please for the love of god get enthusiastic prior consent.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


FWIW, I have given my wife full consent to use me sexually in any way she sees fit before I wake up.

I *LOVE* being woken up that way.


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## tom67 (Oct 2, 2012)

larry.gray said:


> FWIW, I have given my wife full consent to use me sexually in any way she sees fit before I wake up.
> 
> I *LOVE* being woken up that way.


GF does that on occasion:smthumbup:


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## jdd (Aug 30, 2013)

Full conscent is a 100% requirement. Though if I ask for permission one more time she is going to clobber me. I pretty much have an unconditional green light from her.

Obviously I prefer activities where she is more awake (which is what takes place 98% of the time), but still prefer half awake sex with her to doing it myself. Though she always wakes up at least a little bit. The only thing she gets mad about is if I ask for permission too many times. She will holler "just do it, its fine, I don't care".


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## Thunder7 (Jan 2, 2013)

MissScarlett said:


> I do think you should ask ahead of time. I would be fine with it, though. In fact I think I would like to wake up like that.
> 
> As an aside, H has encouraged me to do this with a blow job. However I cant get over the fear he would pee in my mouth if he was asleep when I started. Just to note - I am fine with oral. I'm not stingy with it. The pee thing is only a fear if he was asleep.
> 
> ...


No one would have ever been able to tell you'd been drinking. Not when you use phrases like 'no burden of being reciprocal'. So there were a few other misspellings. Could happen to anyone.  We should have one thread where drinking and typing were actually a prerequisite. That would be interesting.

Maybe I shouldn't post here when I'm sleep deprived.


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## popcorn (Nov 2, 2012)

I would love it if my husband did this. I would just wake up and go with the flow. If it's his fantasy, I'm in plain and simple. I'll take what I can get and appreciate it.


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## popcorn (Nov 2, 2012)

Jack I said:


> I never said that I prefer this kind of sex.I said that I fantasize about it.There are reasons why this is a popular fantasy.


You're allowed to fantasize so don't feel awkward about it. We're all different. Everyone has opinions about everything of course but no matter what, it's OK to want a fantasie fulfilled. That's the whole point!


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## popcorn (Nov 2, 2012)

Jack I said:


> I never said that I prefer this kind of sex.I said that I fantasize about it.There are reasons why this is a popular fantasy.


Makes perfect sense to me.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

In my opinion this is between you and your wife, if it's appropriate for you two you shouldn't need to ask a random forum about it, but thats just me


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## Cosmos (May 4, 2012)

I must be a very light sleeper, because I as sure as hel! couldn't sleep through someone having sex with me.

Waking up to a partner trying to initiate sex (by touching, caressing etc) would be fine with me.


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## MagnificentEddy (Nov 15, 2012)

No Jack, it is inappropriate, in fact it's very very wrong.
BTW, if you can have sex with your wife without waking her, you're doing it wrong.


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## GinnyTonia (Jul 31, 2012)

MissScarlett said:


> As an aside, H has encouraged me to do this with a blow job. However I cant get over the fear he would pee in my mouth if he was asleep when I started. Just to note - I am fine with oral. I'm not stingy with it. The pee thing is only a fear if he was asleep.


Does he pee in his sleep often? (Teehee!)
I thought that it was difficult for guys to pee while aroused. 

I don't do it unless I know he's close to awakening because I'm worried about annoying him while he's tired.


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## I Notice The Details (Sep 15, 2012)

mineforever said:


> ...I enjoy waking him up to a bj and hj as well.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Wow, you are a wonderful lady!!!!!! Can you call my wife and give her some of your suggestions?


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## hambone (Mar 30, 2013)

My XW did a bait and switch on me. Love life was great before we married but that wedding cake just killed it..

One night, in the middle of the night, we made love. Now, this is a woman who had been unresponsive to my touch for a long... well, ever since we got married.

It was great, she was really into it. It was by far the most passionate sex we'd had since we got married. 

She had her arms and legs wrapped around me... she was moaning and groaning.. It was great..


Then, as soon as I finished... she just collapsed, like she'd been shot. 

That morning, I asked her if she was awake last night.. She had no clue about what I was talking about...

Kinda disappointing... I thought maybe something had changed.

See, the excuse she kept using was that she, "Needed a little more time to get used to the idea of having sex." WHAT? She was used to it before we got married! (^$&^$#@


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## mineforever (Jan 31, 2013)

Therealbrighteyes said:


> Screwing someone without their permission is awesome. What you should also do is take the grip end of a tennis racket and ram it up your ass.
> 
> Seriously this guy is still around? The entirety of his posts sound like a who's of serial killers or rapists.



I guess I don't understand your point of view at all. I love being woke up this way....you make it sound like my husband making love to me and arousing me awake as some kind of violation of my person instead of a loving way of wakening me out of sleep and starting my day off feeling thoroughly loved.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

MagnificentEddy said:


> BTW, if you can have sex with your wife without waking her, you're doing it wrong.


:lol:

No truer words spoken.


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## soulsearch (Aug 2, 2013)

*Re: Re: Is it appropriate for me to have sex with my wife while she's sleeping?*



larry.gray said:


> FWIW, I have given my wife full consent to use me sexually in any way she sees fit before I wake up.
> 
> I * WOULD LOVE* being woken up that way.


liked.... and changed for my sitch, lol!


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## tacoma (May 1, 2011)

I've never once "asked" my wife for sex.
In fact I've never once "asked" any woman for sex.
I will never "ask" any woman for sex.

I know of no faster way to completely turn a woman off.

OP,

This is completely dependent on your wife.
I'm not sure I'm getting what you want.

If you want her to remain asleep during the act you're going to have to mention this fantasy beforehand so she can fake it because I'm pretty sure no woman is going to remain asleep during intercourse (unless heavily drugged which I don't recommend).

If you mean wake her up for sex, just start touching her(don't go for the goods right away), kissing her, and see how she responds.

Best to do it right before she has to be up in the morning anyway.


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## missthelove2013 (Sep 23, 2013)

hmm...does this count:
about 5 years into marriage, I woke up around 2am and was just lying there, NOT moving!!!!!...Wife rolled over, put her head on my chest, and started tickling my tummy...worked her way down and grabbed the stiffener...then she went down and gave me head, right to completion, and swallowed like she always DID...then she went back to sleep

wtf!!!

Next morning she did NOT remember this...we had NOT been drinking...

she did it again maybe a month later...next morning, she claimed she remembers it, but thought she was dreaming,,,she got mad and told me NEXT TIME WAKE ME UP

huh??

happened 2 more times and I didnt say a thing, she didnt mention it either...then a 3rd time I woke her...she still gave me head, but crawled on top and "cowgirl'd" me until I came...weird weird weird

years later she isnt mad about it, but when one of her girlfriends complained she was waking up with hubby inside of her (she was deep sleeper)she reminded me and told her friend that it was rape...wtf...her friend actually got turned on by it


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

If you guys make an agreement that this is a possibility, then it should be ok. Of course boundary conditions should be created.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

tacoma said:


> I've never once "asked" my wife for sex.
> In fact I've never once "asked" any woman for sex.
> I will never "ask" any woman for sex.
> 
> ...


If you can carefully penetrate her, it's possible for her to remain asleep. She may dream she's having sex. Of course I wouldn't do this on anyone unaware! If it's a possibility you guys would like, discuss it!


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## where_are_we (May 24, 2013)

I wish my husband would wake me this way. It will never, ever happen though. 

I've woke my husband many times by attempting to do something just for him. He ALWAYS stops me after a few minutes, saying he is too tired or has to get up and get ready for work. Huh? He is the only man I have ever met who turned THAT away, regardless of the hour.

Also, I don't see how she could sleep through it if you were actually doing it "right." ha ha.


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

Multiple threads on this topic all of a sudden. The sleeping wife theme is a "fetish" of sorts. Whatever that is about. Porn links? Idunno.

I have been awakened more than once with a woman having sex with me. My wife has done this. That was many years back though when things were new.

And of course sex when one is half asleep in the middle of the night can be nice. 

But actively trying to have sex with a woman and trying not to wake her up is a whole other thing.


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

tacoma said:


> i've never once "asked" my wife for sex.
> In fact i've never once "asked" any woman for sex.
> I will never "ask" any woman for sex.
> 
> ...


this^^^


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## donny64 (Apr 21, 2012)

I've always wanted to do it with the W. To begin intercourse and have her slowly wake up in the middle of it to a "sleepy - dreamy sex" type thing. Problem is she just sleeps too lightly, and I go anywhere near her hoo-ha and she starltles awake. 

I can sometimes get her the sleepy dreamy "o" by cupping a small vibrator in my hand and very gently applying pressure. Then she'll typically wake slowly, moaning and grinding. Awesome. 

It has everything to do with waking her to dreamy type sex. Nothing to do with just "using her body" while she sleeps. 

We both love it...when I can successfully pull it off.

She's done it to me a few times...slowly maneuvering herself until I'm in her mouth, without waking me. I wake up to that. Again, awesome. 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Leelan (Oct 10, 2013)

_Posted via Mobile Device_. I think if your wife agrees then no problem. My problem is my husband was doing this and seems to have shut down because I asked him to wake me so I could join him. Or, initiate having sex with me when I am awake. It seems because I spoke about this now we have no sex. I'm not going into details because it's already under the thread about his lack on initiating sex. So, for me I think it's fine for my husband to have sex with me sometime when I sleep, but it's sick if that is the only way he can have sex with me. I saw comments about spelling, please for give my errors. My screen is very small.


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## Ano (Jun 7, 2012)

Is it even possible? I'd surely wake up and enjoy it. I couldn't sleep through it.


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## Leelan (Oct 10, 2013)

Ano said:


> Is it even possible? I'd surely wake up and enjoy it. I couldn't sleep through it.


No I don't sleep thru, I wake up and my waking movement makes him orgasm. He's finished, and I'm left semi aroused with hit and run tracks if you get my drift. I tell him, baby you can have all you want don't run. Touch it look at it, it's yours alone. So I think if you're going to have sex with me in a way that turns you on it is only fair you reciprocate and have sex with me in away that turns me on.......awake, I just want to be awake. This stuff is hard to believe and harder to make up.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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