# Am I the only wife in a bdsm relationship



## samanthajones (Jul 2, 2012)

I am not sure if everyone is being honest. If there are any other women in here with dom husbands please shed some light


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## Almostrecovered (Jul 14, 2011)

bdsm lifestyle isn't strictly sex from what I've read


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## Almostrecovered (Jul 14, 2011)

well there are degrees of how far people take it

I think a lot of women feel the way you do angel, my wife likes a little spanking and being "controlled" during sex as well. 

but I've seen sites where it's a complete lifestyle, it's an interesting mindset, one that confuses me but I won't judge it.


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## Jeff/BC (Apr 1, 2012)

samanthajones said:


> I am not sure if everyone is being honest. If there are any other women in here with dom husbands please shed some light


Carol and I.
*edited to add*
In my opinion, this isn't the right forum for the discussion of such things. If you have specific questions, feel free to send them to Carol or myself. Carol doesn't read here anymore, so if you send her something, it's best to send me a short message just so I can tell her to check her messages.


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## samanthajones (Jul 2, 2012)

It isn't all sex but, most think it is, the lifestyle is great, easy, and not all the stress from making the decisions. Things started light for me too and too some they are still light. 



Angel5112 said:


> None that I know of. You would be better to ask in the Sex in Marriage section though.


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## CLucas976 (Jun 27, 2010)

I'll be a little overly honest.

It's an interesting lifestyle. I worked really hard to get the ex into his dom side. I mean, I can be quite the antagonist when I want abuse.

I've certainly played around with humiliation and pain. I enjoy having the control taken from me and being at the mercy of someone else.

THAT being said. to the degree of your relationship op, wouldn't do it. 

After whatever happy sex play, the submissive part of my brain gets shut off. It might take me a minute, but it goes off. As kinked as the rest of the lifestyle sounds, its one of those things better left to fantasy, I could not commit to day in and day out of that, and I certainly would not get a body alteration in an effort to please.

Not that people can't have happy long term relationships this way, it does happen. Or that I really think there is anything wrong with it; its just not something I could put up with beyond the bedroom.


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## Henri (Jun 30, 2012)

CLucas976 said:


> Not that people can't have happy long term relationships this way, it does happen. Or that I really think there is anything wrong with it; its just not something I could put up with beyond the bedroom.


I am curious how you seperate it from the bedroom?


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## CLucas976 (Jun 27, 2010)

I have control issues, I'm thick headed, persistent, stubborn, and don't like to be told what to do?

which probably has everything to do with my sexual tendencies.

It really just ends there, and stays there. That has to be the general understanding or game over.


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## Henri (Jun 30, 2012)

CLucas976 said:


> I have control issues, I'm thick headed, persistent, stubborn, and don't like to be told what to do?
> 
> which probably has everything to do with my sexual tendencies.
> 
> It really just ends there, and stays there. That has to be the general understanding or game over.


Thanks for the reply. So you are stronger out of the bedroom and enjoy some submissiveness in it.


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## CLucas976 (Jun 27, 2010)

I feel like I was just interviewed for some reason. 

This calls for a beer.


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## samanthajones (Jul 2, 2012)

Were in a good place now we talked a lot on vacation. Thanks for everything and sorry to bother you all were very nice for the most part.


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## *LittleDeer* (Apr 19, 2012)

I guess I am in one yes.

I would say it has some aspects of a full time BDSM but not all. 

I prefer to look at it as a cross between BDSM and TIH. 

With lots of love and affection too.


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## samanthajones (Jul 2, 2012)

Would you say its more bdsm or normal. 



*LittleDeer* said:


> I guess I am in one yes.
> 
> I would say it has some aspects of a full time BDSM but not all.
> 
> ...


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## His_Pixie (Jan 29, 2012)

There's a broad spectrum to BDSM. There's the 24/7 lifestyle and there's the just-in-the-bedroom and there's the just-in-the-bedroom sometimes. 

24/7<-------------------------------------------------->Sometimes

At what part of that spectrum are you asking about?


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