# More Fodder For The Culture Of Infidelity



## farsidejunky (Mar 19, 2014)

Why more women are letting their husbands cheat | New York Post

:banghead:


----------



## jld (Dec 1, 2013)

I think women have been tolerating this, usually for practical reasons, since forever, far. I agree that it is disappointing.


----------



## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

Makes sense as a business arrangement.

I just hope that they never tell child #5 that she was conceived so that daddy can have sex with someone other than mommy.


----------



## threelittlestars (Feb 18, 2016)

I think its a PATHETIC entitled arrangement. To me it just feels like an empty marriage. I understand open marriages and romance, but the article talks of a hall pass weekend. Not allowance for an affair. In some cased ONS are easier to forgive for SOME people. 
This article makes everything, even sex in marriage sound like a business transaction.


----------



## Marduk (Jul 16, 2010)

Transaction oriented lifestyle.

I see the logic in it. If you're shallow or afraid to demand more from life.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Truthseeker1 (Jul 17, 2013)

Infidelity is glamorized everywhere...they made a fvcking musical of Bridges of ******* Country get this from Wikipedia:

*"Francesca tearfully considers the path that brought her and Robert together and ultimately separated them, but regrets neither her affair with him nor her choice to stay with her family."*

You can read the rest here:

The Bridges of ******* County (musical)

This type of sh!t turns my stomach and I dont get people who find this sh!t story romantic...


----------



## NobodySpecial (Nov 22, 2013)

If they agreed, it is not cheating.


----------



## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*This really makes one truly wonder what the whole point and purpose of the concept of "marital vows" ever was being ecclesiastically adopted in the first place!*
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## ReformedHubby (Jan 9, 2013)

I don't know. I guess I'm the only one, but I don't think this is new. A lot of the examples they gave were wealthy celebrity men and their wives. In these cases I think a lot of women are willing to look the other way. Sure, if they filed for divorce they would be set money wise. But for these women the lifestyle and notoriety of being Mrs. "So and So" might actually be more important. I guess I'm saying I don't feel sorry for them. They don't seem to be devastated by it at all.


----------



## Truthseeker1 (Jul 17, 2013)

ReformedHubby said:


> I don't know. I guess I'm the only one, but I don't think this is new. A lot of the examples they gave were wealthy celebrity men and their wives. In these cases I think a lot of women are willing to look the other way. Sure, if they filed for divorce they would be set money wise. But for these women the lifestyle and notoriety of being Mrs. "So and So" might actually be more important. I guess I'm saying I don't feel sorry for them. They don't seem to be devastated by it at all.


I know people who worked in finance on Wall Street and they would tell me the "big shots" had these arrangements all the time - some even had an apartment in NYC and a big house in the 'burbs - they would stay in NYC during the week while their family lived in a big house in the 'burbs and they would go home on weekends. During the week in between working a zillion hours they'd have young mistresses and their wives turned a blind eye because they had a comfortable lifestyle...it was an "open secret" at work...


----------



## Maxo (Mar 8, 2016)

jld said:


> I think women have been tolerating this, usually for practical reasons, since forever, far.
> I agree , and women have been cheating forever, as well, although it is on the rise and has just about equaled or overtaken men in some demographics,


----------



## Maxo (Mar 8, 2016)

jld said:


> I think women have been tolerating this, usually for practical reasons, since forever, far. I agree that it is disappointing.


These women need to look within to see why they have driven their husbands to cheat, right jld?


----------



## QuietSoul (Feb 11, 2012)

I literally just finished reading it after a friend posted it on FB, and I came here to share it then saw this


----------



## Marduk (Jul 16, 2010)

Ok.

I'm going to throw one thing out there. It's a true story, friends of ours from way back that moved away and we lost touch with them.

Due to some health issues and "that's the way married people are" the wife stopped being so interested in sex, and the husband's sex drive seemed to increase. 

Until he started obviously cheating on her (********* move), but her response was to turn a blind eye to it. Because... It was a relief. She got her husband during the week, no pressure in bed, and he would take off overnight on the weekends and return happy.

My wife and I were like 'WTF' about it, but she claimed to be happy.

That is, until he left her for the other woman, and now it's all bad of course.

Anyway. This happens. I think it's easy to see the sense in it, until it all blows up in your face and ends badly. Not what always happens, but I'm sure it happens more often than not.


----------



## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

That last woman, Sophie, just sounds pathetic. And how sad is it that that first woman agreed to compromise her principles just to have another baby.

I am sure there are lots of marriages with similar arrangements for the wife. Probably more today than ever before. But I really fail to see the point of being married in the first place. Why even be married?? Why not just 'be together' without the piece of paper?

I dunno, I think the institution of marriage as a lifelong monogamous relationship should be put on the back burner and people should just do what they want to. It would provide for much more honesty than we see now, where people who aren't really the monogamous type get married and then cheat. You can't cheat if it is assumed that you're going to have sex with other people. People who WANT to be monogamous still could be, but that would be spelled out and agreed upon beforehand.


----------



## jld (Dec 1, 2013)

ReformedHubby said:


> I don't know. I guess I'm the only one, but I don't think this is new. A lot of the examples they gave were wealthy celebrity men and their wives. In these cases I think a lot of women are willing to look the other way. Sure, if they filed for divorce they would be set money wise. But for these women the lifestyle and notoriety of being Mrs. "So and So" might actually be more important. I guess I'm saying I don't feel sorry for them. They don't seem to be devastated by it at all.


I do not feel sorry for them, either.


----------



## jld (Dec 1, 2013)

Maxo said:


> These women need to look within to see why they have driven their husbands to cheat, right jld?


I am thinking of Hillary Clinton. I read once that Bill told her he wanted a divorce in the early 80s (had found someone he wanted to be with) and she talked him out of it. I think that was too bad, for both of them.


----------



## Satya (Jun 22, 2012)

I don't understand it.

If they both agree to the arrangement, so be it, but I'd rather just be let go of if my SO wanted some strange. I will absolutely not put myself at risk for STDs. There's no way I'd believe he has my health at the forefront of his mind. Frequent blood testing gets expensive. Ska-rew that situation!


----------



## MEM2020 (Aug 23, 2009)

Far,
I am pro monogamy. It forces a high level of engagement. 

BUT - most unilaterally sexless marriages - seem to contain the same type of betrayal associated with an affair. 

And culturally - I've got a huge issue with the idea that - your only 'valid' option is to divorce. 

And fwiw - I am not fond of the whole idea of swinging. At all. 

I couldn't live like that. 

I do think a lot of LDs exploit the enormous costs of divorce, when they check out of the marriage. 

Truth is, most frustrated HD folks only really act when they - snap. 
And by then they are polluted by hurt and anger. 

And then what comes across is: I don't love you anymore, so I'm leaving. Or worse, I hate you for not loving me. 








farsidejunky said:


> Why more women are letting their husbands cheat | New York Post
> 
> :banghead:


----------



## Maxo (Mar 8, 2016)

MEM11363 said:


> Far,
> I am pro monogamy. It forces a high level of engagement.
> 
> BUT - most unilaterally sexless marriages - seem to contain the same type of betrayal associated with an affair.
> ...


No,the betrayal is different because it is known. Thus,the recipient has options and is not,unknowingly,susidizing it.


----------



## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

Well..
......

Maybe they plan events while hubby is away.

I agree with @NobodySpecial

It isn't cheating if it is an arrangement.

It is a lifestyle.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## becareful (Jan 28, 2016)

Truthseeker1 said:


> Infidelity is glamorized everywhere...they made a fvcking musical of Bridges of ******* Country get this from Wikipedia:
> 
> *"Francesca tearfully considers the path that brought her and Robert together and ultimately separated them, but regrets neither her affair with him nor her choice to stay with her family."*
> 
> ...


I wonder how many tv shows that center around infidelity get cancelled because people trigger and boycott it.


----------



## Maxo (Mar 8, 2016)

Truthseeker1 said:


> Infidelity is glamorized everywhere...they made a fvcking musical of Bridges of ******* Country get this from Wikipedia:
> 
> *"Francesca tearfully considers the path that brought her and Robert together and ultimately separated them, but regrets neither her affair with him nor her choice to stay with her family."*
> 
> ...


Would probably go somethimg like this: "Franseca wanted **** and wanted it bad..."
That smarmy,cliched script should be run through CL's UBT.


----------



## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

NobodySpecial said:


> If they agreed, it is not cheating.


It's still ADULTRY no matter how you cut it.


----------



## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

My wife actually told me that, due to her lack of interest in sex, that I could take a lover.

She then told me about her very close female friend who was in the same position as me, having no sex because her chap could not perform sexually due to medicsl issues.

I turned the offer down as gently as I could.

I turned it down because I knew that I find her friend so attractive -she is physically VERY much my type and we share the same sense of humour, whilst my ASD wife doesn't understand my jokes- that my having sex with her could have gone very badly indeed.

I think my rejection of her idea pleased my wife the next evening as she initiated sex which was the longest and best session in years. 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------

