# Wife is too exposed during massage



## Sam L. Houston

My wife recently started getting regular massage at a local studio from a male therapist. After some prodding, my wife described me the massage. She starts off nude under a towel on her stomach. When he massages her lower back the towel is then partially and then completely removed. When she is on her back, her breasts are exposed and the towel is always covering her genitals. 

This has happed the last couple of sessions. He asked her permission and she agreed. My wife is 37 and looks pretty good. The masseur is much younger. I've met him a couple of times and I don't really feel comfortable with this guy spending so much time with my wife nude. 

She says it doesn't bother her and makes it easier for him. She's accusing me of being controlling. I know nothing is happening but still...


----------



## marriedguy

No way would I be ok with that...that's too much exposure, maybe that's because I'm an ass man...there's no reason she cant keep her panties on...and if he's massaging her boobs then I think it's sexual..even if he's a "professional" he's still a guy.


----------



## sisters359

I have many, many massages from therapists of both sexes and NEVER had my naked butt or breasts exposed. Professional therapists would, IMO, never even ask. I tend to lie nude under the sheets, but panties and/or bras are normal for many women even with a female therapist. Professionals are trained to work around this type of clothing.

Your wife is pretty much a massage novice if she thinks this is a normal masseuse request, and the dude is taking advantage of her. Or she knows darn well that this is not typical and she's complicit in the indiscretion. 

I live in the US and have no idea about standards elsewhere, btw.


----------



## marriedguy

Things are a little different en Europe I hear..hahaha
Talk to the dude, tell him to never massage your wife without her panties...that's what I would do..in fact I dont think I'd let her go to that therapist anymore..even if she gets mad...but that's just me...


----------



## morningdew

This is why I prefer to have a female masseuse LOL. 
But seriously tho', usually bra off is fine but never heard of the total naked thing. I agree with Sister, she might thinks it's normal but believe me it doesn't sounds like a 'regular' massage. 

I'm in Asia, and no we don't strip butt naked


----------



## unloved

I see a female massage therapist weekly and am completely naked under the covers. She always has either a towel or covers over my breasts, netherregions and butt. She does, however, uncover one butt cheek at a time to really massage my glutes (a problem area for me during hard marathon training). She always gives you the option to keep as much clothing on as you feel comfortable with. 

There's really no reason to have breasts, genitals or the entire butt exposed even without undergarments on. The MT should be skilled at placing and tucking the covers/towel to prevent overexposure during the massage. 

I would be worried - this doesn't sound like professional behavior to me especially with an opposite sex MT.


----------



## Freak On a Leash

No way would I do that with a male masseuse and I wouldn't put up with my husband having it done with a female. NO FREAKIN' WAY!!

Tell her to find another masseuse, a female or none at all. It's your right. If she resists then you go in there and stand there and watch. See how long that lasts. 

The things people put up with..*shakes head*


----------



## Rob2380

Freak On a Leash said:


> I wouldn't put up with my husband having it done with a female. NO FREAKIN' WAY!!


I have been visiting a female professional masseuse in a spa for a few years. I am always naked under a sheet (but had the option to leave on as much as I wanted), but covered so that only the part of the body being massaged is exposed. When she massages the my glutes, only one side is is exposed at a time. The sheet is very carefully placed so I am covered on the other side. When I'm on my back and she's doing my legs, the sheet is arranged so I am completely covered in the genitals at all times. She is very careful to make me feel comfortable while preserving my modesty, but at the same time allowing her to give me a great massage. I've described the entire process to my wife and she's fine with this.

Now, if my wife were being massaged by a male and he wanted to expose her in the way described in the original post, there's no way I'd allow that. I'd have her stop seeing the guy. This is not the norm in my experience.


----------



## del88

I'm wondering if there was something going on whether she would have still told you. Maybe she could agree on another massage therapist. If she really cares about you, one wouldn't think that should be a problem.


----------



## mike1

I agree with you, I would not be comfortable with my wife being naked and getting rubbed down my a young male masseuse. Suggest she seek a different place out and even try a female. Talk to her and like the other poster said, if she loves and cares about you it shouldn't be a problem.


----------



## Deejo

I'd clarify the procedure with your wife, and just make sure you are on the same page in terms of what exactly is happening. 

Naked isn't a big deal to some, to others it is. A professional masseuse is about making you feel relaxed and comfortable. If your wife is obviously uncomfortable with what he is doing, then his behavior borders on predatory.


----------



## momof6girls

go to a session with her... i mean if he is professional and it is all level then he would be ok giving her the normal routine with you in the room... 

O HELL no..!!!


----------



## OneMarriedGuy

OK.. well this is one of those tough situations. She obviously has no problems with it. You do.

So...is her no problem because she gets a sexual excitement from it? Most likely (she probably at least likes the attention and has a bit of fantasy that she is turning him on). Would she admit that to you if she wishes to continue. Most likely not. Will they ever go further? ... don't know.

You have already expressed your discomfort, she has already let you know that she has no intention of things changing.

So how bad does it bug you. Because whether there is more than just a little flirt going on or not - you are most likely going to get the " you are over jealous, controlling and don't trust me" line.


----------



## MMA_FIGHTER

marriedguy said:


> No way would I be ok with that...that's too much exposure, maybe that's because I'm an ass man...there's no reason she cant keep her panties on...and if he's massaging her boobs then I think it's sexual..even if he's a "professional" he's still a guy.


:iagree: yeah baby, im an ass man too and if you start touching my wifes ass, we got problems...now i understand that massages are like that...butt, that doesnt mean i agree with getting an ass massage....her ass massage comes from me and no one else unless we are swinging.....and we have never done that yet. cause if i got a massage from some hot asian chick, my wife would not be happy about it either...especially if it was a prostate massage :iagree:


----------



## russ101

I definitely know how you feel. About a year ago, my wife started going to get a monthly massage. She wanted a guy because she said that their hands were much stronger. I never knew to what degree she got undressed (I guess I never really thought about it) Then one day I went with her (we had to go to a friends home afterwards for dinner). I was shocked when she got undressed down to her bra and panties. When he walked in she layed down and when she laid on her stomach, he undid her bra to massage her back. She was laying there almost completely naked making small talk with him. Afterwards I told her how suprised I was that she got that undressed. She said Its all professional as you can see. I get undressed for my doctor and you don't have a problem with that do you? I guess after that I had no real problem with it (even though he was a younger good looking male). I will say though she only had her bra undone while she was laying on her stomach. As soon as he wanted her to roll over, he hooked her bra back up. She never was laying on her back topless. I would be suspicious of someone that required her to do this. It doesn't seem to be professional. Ask her why she lays on her back topless. Most therapists will let you undress down to what you feel comfortable with. They won't require you to be naked.


----------



## jplj

My wife and I recently took a vacation to Thailand and while we were there went to a massage/spa recommended by our host. It was a smaller private house and the couple we were staying with knew the owner and his wife. We had a joint massage and although we both started naked, covered with a large towel, as the husband worked on my wife he kept lowering the towel until she was completely uncovered. At first I felt a little uncomfortable but since our hosts had recommended them, I thought it was just the custom there. She was just having a deep tissue massage and as he worked on her legs, it was pretty clear that he could see between them from behind.

When I started to think about it, I found it fairly sexually arousing and actualy got an erection as his wife worked on my lower back and buttocks. When I finally had to turn over, my penis was fully erect and I was completely embarrassed, hoping that my wife would not turn to look over at me. But the wife that was doing me was completely professional and did not pay attention to it. Eventually it subsided, and I turned over again as she finished. 

When my wife turned over, she was covered, and although he only lowered the towel to the tops of her breasts, he eventuall raised the lower half until her entire pubic triangle was exposed. But neither of them ever touched our genitals the entire time. My point in writing this is that I should probably asked them to keep us covered, but my erotic curiousity at having strange man see my wife nude took over. I think there must be other men out there that feel the same way, but does that make me a bad person? I don't know and am curious what others think or if others have had an experience like this.


----------



## Monty

When my wife and I were on our honeymoon about ten years ago when we were a little more adventuresome, we ordered a male masseur to come to the room and give a massage while I watched. We were just back from the pool when he arrived and my wife removed her bikini in front of him and he gave her a bath before giving her a complete nude massage. I must admit it was a turn on for me to see her oiled up with this younger guy and completley nude. We haven't done much more like that since but I still get turned on when I think about it.


----------



## marriedguy

There's no chance I would get turned on seeing some other dude massage my wife, especially if it's her ass, breasts, thighs, etc...
Although, my heart might pick up beats per minute causing me to rage in a furious pace..


----------



## Teufelhunden

For what it's worth I don't think it is right. I just got a massage the other day and the gal working on me adjusted the sheet over my nipples after it had moved down. I am a man BTW so it didn't bother me that my chest was exposed, but she told my they weren't supposed to expose the nipples. As for removing the blanket at any time I call BS. The blanket is there to keep the person warm and the muscles relaxed. From the sound of it the guy isn't to professional. JMO


----------



## Freak On a Leash

Rob2380 said:


> I have been visiting a female professional masseuse in a spa for a few years. I am always naked under a sheet (but had the option to leave on as much as I wanted), but covered so that only the part of the body being massaged is exposed. When she massages the my glutes, only one side is is exposed at a time. The sheet is very carefully placed so I am covered on the other side. When I'm on my back and she's doing my legs, the sheet is arranged so I am completely covered in the genitals at all times. She is very careful to make me feel comfortable while preserving my modesty, but at the same time allowing her to give me a great massage. I've described the entire process to my wife and she's fine with this.


Well, if your wife is good by it, then it works for you. It all sounds fine but I figure I can give my husband any massage he may need and I often do just that. 

It's not that I figure my husband is going to cheat and he's never given me reason to think he would. I just don't like the idea of some other woman laying her hands on uh..certain spots or even being near them. Yeah, I'm the jealous type. I'll admit it.


----------



## Q*bert

unloved said:


> I see a female massage therapist weekly and am completely naked under the covers. She always has either a towel or covers over my breasts, netherregions and butt. She does, however, uncover one butt cheek at a time to really massage my glutes (a problem area for me during hard marathon training). She always gives you the option to keep as much clothing on as you feel comfortable with.
> 
> There's really no reason to have breasts, genitals or the entire butt exposed even without undergarments on. The MT should be skilled at placing and tucking the covers/towel to prevent overexposure during the massage.
> 
> I would be worried - this doesn't sound like professional behavior to me especially with an opposite sex MT.


^ Agreed. 

I hope your wife tip him extra at the end for his "special attention".


----------



## MarkTwain

As a European masseur, I can tell you it is quite normal for the client to be nude in some settings. It depends where you go. If you see a massage therapist who works in a treatment room in a gymnasium, you will be offered towels, but you may be able to request nudity. If you go to an aromatherapist however, you will be expected to keep most of your underwear on, and they will tuck the towel under your boxers/knickers to make absolutly sure there is no accidental exposure. 

When people come to someone like me, who works at home, I am so used to doing people nude that I only offer towels if they come across as old-fashioned. I have towels clearly visible on the shelf, so they can always ask. But quite frankly, people like the feel of being able to relax naked in a warm room with someone running their hands all over them.

Your wife probably gets a kick out of being massaged nude. This may not be such a bad thing - she may come home horny, and expect you to deal with it  If you lose your aggravated attitude, you may be in for a good time.

Masseurs are used to dealing with naked people all day long. This guy may or may not want to take advantage, you need to work out if he has the right boundaries in place or not. In the meantime... RELAX


----------



## braveheart2009

I think its bang out of order for guys to let their wifes have these types of massages. Reverse the roles what the guys got a massage off hot half dressed girls taking pants off and massaging **** under bedsheets! how would the wifes feel. I think its disgusting. A massage with the same sex is okay but still why can't the husbands and wifes massage each other its free and it increases the relationship between the 2 better? There are online and offline courses, books etc that teach you how to massage like a pro invest in that rather than paying all that money for a 30min/1hr session.


----------



## Keely

Your wife is comfortable with the massage she is having, and you should not be interfering - you have an over-active imagination which is fantasizing all sorts of worse-case scenarios. 

You are showing signs of being a control freak. 
I think you should trust her completely instead of acting like a jerk.


----------



## albertini

That is ridiculous your wife must be enjoying the touch, i would never let her go near that masseur again, it might seem innocent to her but on the long run she will start having some bizarre feelings and would want to experiment, my advice is STOP HER!


----------



## lindamontamae

What does it matter? It's likely the masseur sees nudity everyday and is not interested in looking at you wife anyway. I've been going to same masseur for a couple of years now and although I'm covered with a towel I'm sure he's seen all of me at one point. It's not something you should worry about. He's a professional. My husband didn't like me getting massages from a man at the beginning but now he's used to it. Get over it and stop wasting energy being jealous.


----------



## MarkTwain

lindamontamae said:


> What does it matter? It's likely the masseur sees nudity everyday and is not interested in looking at you wife anyway.


This is very true. One gets used to it.


----------



## lindamontamae

You're right. It is more relaxing not having to worry about the towel all the time. And I have to admit my husband gets the benefits when I get home!


----------



## MarkTwain

lindamontamae said:


> And I have to admit my husband gets the benefits when I get home!


That's right! Some people are just too insecure to see this simple point. But if you're insecure, your insecure, folks


----------



## lindamontamae

I visit my masseur at his private studio. He's 20, I'm in my (uhhh) late thirties. I don't think he's interested in seeing the fun bits of an older lady. I think he just wants to get the job done and not fuss with a towel. And is it so bad that it turns me on a little? My husband gets all the benefits. Are there any other men out there whose wife is regularly exposed nude to another man. How do you feel about it?


----------



## IBelieveInScience

Speaking from personal experience as a massage therapist in the US. This type of draping is not common, but also not totally unheard of. We spend our days rubbing lotion on people with no clothes.....it's not exactly stimulating. Professionalism is important, but with a regular client, you develop a relationship that is geared toward the clients comfort level. 

Of course she "enjoys the touch" as someone mentioned. He's a professional 'toucher-of persons.' Having been on both sides of the table so-to-speak, the idea that he does this to get erotic pleasure from looking at your wifes boobs is silly. You get in "the zone" doing the same thing you do 6 times a day.

The chance that _she does this to bathe is his male attention is only as likely as you (who know her best) think it is. 

The fact that you and wifey haven't talked about boundaries in these situations is not his problem. Also, I doubt your approach of wanting control of what she does with her body when she's not on your time isn't going over well with her._


----------



## bbinsider

My wife had a short-term affair with a massage therapist (from a national chain) who was 15-20 years her junior. IT CAN HAPPEN! It just about put us in divorced court and took an entire year for the marriage to get back to half way normal. I bought into the whole "massage professional" thing also and until she brought home a STD from the twenty-something boy. For those who compare massage therapist to doctors; keep in mind, doctors are 100 times smarter and richer than your average massage therapist. They also have 1000 times more too lose. There is also a nurse in the room much of the time. By the way, the affair started right in the massage room after a few weeks of regular massages.

Ladies ... no matter who the male therapist is, if you are half way decent looking, he's thinking about more than the massage. That is a fact.


----------



## magnoliagal

That would not be okay with me. I'm modest and when I've gotten massages I keep undies on and nobody touches my ass or my boobs. I can't imagine my dh ever being okay with even if were.

No way.


----------



## venis

So what do you think as her husband,
If it bothers you than ask her to stop and if she doen't then you need to make some choises.
I for one don't have a problem with it. I believe that our social pressure in the states causes us to freak out if you see a butt crack, and why if you don't want to see something don't look. If you trust your wife just tell her I don't like this, but if you really want somebody eles to see you nude than go for it. This will do two things one remove the shock factor and second gives her the choice. see what happens


----------



## choreplay

_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Runs like Dog

I'm guessing a masseuse (female) is out of the question or would that be bothersome too?


----------



## choreplay

Oook... Where to start... I'm a US-based Massage Therapist for a little under seven years. Here's some basic standards/practices info:

-In the US, true massage professionals refer to themselves as "massage therapists". They do this because "massage therapist", in most states, is a licensed profession. Which means everything that normally means for licensed health professionals. There is anywhere from 8 months to 2 years of schooling and typically a certification exam involved in getting licensed. We have malpractice insurance, continuing education requirements, and strict codes of conduct that specify what we are and are not allowed to do, on pain of discipline by the state. In most states it is ILLEGAL for an unlicensed individual to claim that they are or refer to themselves as a "massage therapist". 

-(Again, in the US, this differs with other countries) Massage Therapists will not refer to themselves as masseurs or masseuses because this is an outdated designation typically used for unlicensed massage practitioners. These people may have some skill, or not. They may be legitimate, or they may participate in unethical, prostitute-like behavior. If you are in the US, you want to always see a Massage Therapist, and confirm that they are licensed for this reason.

-State laws vary slightly, but in almost every circumstance it is inappropriate and/or malpractice/illegal to perform therapeutic massage on the genitals of both sexes and the breasts of women. Since there are large and important postural muscles in the buttocks, massage there is allowed provided that appropriate draping is maintained. Anyone who knowingly gives OR recieves any sort of sexual touch in a massage setting, for money, should be wary that they are committing potentially an offense they could face criminal charges for.

-All this is pretty self explanatory and intuitive, but the OP was talking about draping. Here's how draping works: (again laws vary slightly by setting and case) patients should always be able to leave on as many garments as they feel comfortable with. Massage therapists are trained to work on people of both sexes in every state of dress or undress. Draping should always cover genitals of both sexes and breasts of women (some states or localities want men's chests covered as well, but this is less common), and buttocks are exposed using draping techniques that keep the sheet covering an area approximately equivalent to a bikini bathing suit bottom. Breast exposure is a tricky question because there are inherent gray areas. Pectoral massage is appropriate and common with women, but this necessitates careful draping to expose the reachable part of the pec muscle without exposing the breasts themselves. Accidental breast, genital, and buttock exposure do occur from time to time in a massage setting, but there is a very clearly defined difference between accidental and deliberate (or even just lazy). Accidental exposure (including things like involuntary sexual response in men) are no cause for alarm, but according to rules of practice, the therapist is obligated to stop the massage if the patient refuses or is unable to then subsequently be draped in the appropriate way. Which means "oops" is fine as long as it's clearly just an accident, but repeated "oops" or "lets not bother with the sheet" is NOT ok. Regardless of who suggests it. In the US, therefore, this massage therapist's (if indeed he is a licensed massage therapist) behavior is in violation of at least the AMTA's code of conduct, very likely the rules of conduct of his licensure, and possibly state and local law.

-And just to clarify on the nature of the job, I'm a male massage therapist and after working on thousands of tired, often sore or otherwise uncomfortable men and women (of all ages and body types), the sight of their unclothed bodies holds little or no mystery to me anymore. I work exclusively in clinical/rehab settings and I do the job because it's the only medical job I've been able to find where the patients are always happy to see me and where I'm not also expected to answer the phone while I'm working. One thing good massage schools teach is strong mental separation from the therapist's own sexuality during treatment, as it is incredibly easy for a patient to be able to sense what a therapist is thinking or feeling during treatment. Hence, when I go into into a room to treat someone, my sexuality stays outside. I work in clinics, too, which are decidedly unsexy places, and i have additional training and qualifications to help my doctors with other types of non-massage care. Spa people are a different breed but the rules are there for all of us, and the vast majority of us follow them to the letter. Even in a clinic, accidental exposure happens. So do erections, farting, and all sorts of other bodily things. Not a big deal. Laziness or deliberate disobedience of the rules of licensure, however is not excusable. If this is a massage therapist in the US, do me and my fellow legitimate rule-following male massage therapists a favor and quietly report this clown. I'm not sure how things are done in Europe, but in the US massage therapists are legitimate professionals who still struggle with trying to distinguish themselves from the lazy, unethical, hypersexualized stereotype.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Mrs.G

russ101 said:


> I definitely know how you feel. About a year ago, my wife started going to get a monthly massage. She wanted a guy because she said that their hands were much stronger. I never knew to what degree she got undressed (I guess I never really thought about it) Then one day I went with her (we had to go to a friends home afterwards for dinner). I was shocked when she got undressed down to her bra and panties. When he walked in she layed down and when she laid on her stomach, he undid her bra to massage her back. She was laying there almost completely naked making small talk with him. Afterwards I told her how suprised I was that she got that undressed. She said Its all professional as you can see. I get undressed for my doctor and you don't have a problem with that do you? I guess after that I had no real problem with it (even though he was a younger good looking male). I will say though she only had her bra undone while she was laying on her stomach. As soon as he wanted her to roll over, he hooked her bra back up. She never was laying on her back topless. I would be suspicious of someone that required her to do this. It doesn't seem to be professional. Ask her why she lays on her back topless. Most therapists will let you undress down to what you feel comfortable with. They won't require you to be naked.


This is what I am used to when I get a massage. Usually, the therapist drapes a towel over my breasts and bum. The OP's concerns are completely understandable.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## threedinmt

jplj said:


> My wife and I recently took a vacation to Thailand and while we were there went to a massage/spa recommended by our host. It was a smaller private house and the couple we were staying with knew the owner and his wife. We had a joint massage and although we both started naked, covered with a large towel, as the husband worked on my wife he kept lowering the towel until she was completely uncovered. At first I felt a little uncomfortable but since our hosts had recommended them, I thought it was just the custom there. She was just having a deep tissue massage and as he worked on her legs, it was pretty clear that he could see between them from behind.
> 
> When I started to think about it, I found it fairly sexually arousing and actualy got an erection as his wife worked on my lower back and buttocks. When I finally had to turn over, my penis was fully erect and I was completely embarrassed, hoping that my wife would not turn to look over at me. But the wife that was doing me was completely professional and did not pay attention to it. Eventually it subsided, and I turned over again as she finished.
> 
> When my wife turned over, she was covered, and although he only lowered the towel to the tops of her breasts, he eventuall raised the lower half until her entire pubic triangle was exposed. But neither of them ever touched our genitals the entire time. My point in writing this is that I should probably asked them to keep us covered, but my erotic curiousity at having strange man see my wife nude took over. I think there must be other men out there that feel the same way, but does that make me a bad person? I don't know and am curious what others think or if others have had an experience like this.


----------



## threedinmt

look I've never shared a naked massage with my wife though I would love too. I can completely understand about the massive hard-on I get the same affect when my wife steps out provocatively dressed. I sort of enjoy other guys looking at the goods but often times try and shield her from their gaze.


----------



## threedinmt

I'm glad your masseuse turns you on some, but if he don't simply love looking over your fun bits then I'd find one who does. A good masseuse is there to give you a service and being complimentary of a fantastic nude thirty something body is a shame. He should take his time and smell the beautiful roses particularly when she in bloom.


----------



## bossesgirl26

My husband would never allow that. Underwear would be a must.


----------



## cafedoc123

Keely said:


> Your wife is comfortable with the massage she is having, and you should not be interfering - you have an over-active imagination which is fantasizing all sorts of worse-case scenarios.
> 
> You are showing signs of being a control freak.
> I think you should trust her completely instead of acting like a jerk.


What a load of crap. If your spouse is comfortable doing something and your not, you should just let them do it? What kind of relationship is that? If a wife doesn't like her husband surfing porn, but the husband is comfortable with it, is the wife a control freak?

Sorry--if you are in a committed relationship and truly love and respect one another, then your partners feelings are, um IMPORTANT. Communication is important here. 

I wonder if the roles were reversed and he was getting a massage from a comely young woman, buck naked and sporting an erection. How would the wife feel then?


----------



## LadyFrog

Freak On a Leash said:


> No way would I do that with a male masseuse and I wouldn't put up with my husband having it done with a female. NO FREAKIN' WAY!!
> 
> Tell her to find another masseuse, a female or none at all. It's your right. If she resists then you go in there and stand there and watch. See how long that lasts.
> 
> The things people put up with..*shakes head*



Yep. I would get myself into that massage room faster than a monkey on a ripe banana, every time. Stand there and watch. If it's all innocent she won't have a problem with you being there.


----------



## Lionelhutz

Years ago this would have bothered me, not now.

I


----------



## diwali123

I get massages and I'm naked under a sheet. If the guy wants to sneak perks at the side of my breasts I guess he can but I don't think it's more than what you would see on a beach. I've asked my h if he problems with it and he says no. I just feel like I can relax more without worrying about them having to work around straps, and it just feels better because they have a heated pad on the table. I do prefer men because they are stronger and with women there is a weird vibe. 
Men aren't as hesitant somehow. And if he thinks I'm hot and enjoys it in his head while maintaining professional standards I don't care.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## diwali123

I meant to say I think exposing her breasts is too much and not professional. The butt thing: that's a muscle that holds a lot of tension. I had a female therapist work wonders on my back pain by releasing the muscles there. I would probably not feel comfortable with a male doing the same. Partly because I might enjoy it the wrong way and I'd feel guilty!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## threedinmt

on your honeymoon getting naked and worked over by another man, wow truely a woman who gets get her cake and eats it to


----------



## threedinmt

lindamontamae said:


> What does it matter? It's likely the masseur sees nudity everyday and is not interested in looking at you wife anyway. I've been going to same masseur for a couple of years now and although I'm covered with a towel I'm sure he's seen all of me at one point. It's not something you should worry about. He's a professional. My husband didn't like me getting massages from a man at the beginning but now he's used to it. Get over it and stop wasting energy being jealous.


yes and whats wrong with a man doing a job he loves


----------



## gidalover

I think your wife is already crossing the limit.just think yourself and do the needful immediately. What do you think if a 25 year old man find an attractive MILF to massage her ass ? You said they take a long time and it appears they have enough fun fooling a poor man like you.:lol:


----------



## touchdown

These posts are interesting - they point out how sensitive this subject is. I've been having massages for 17 years with a trained and certified massage therapist (he has all his certificates on the wall). I accidentally found him when I was having terrible trouble with carpal tunnel syndrome, and as he was so excellent, I stayed with him, otherwise I would not have stayed with a man as I feel uncomfortable undressing. I have a massage about every 6 weeks.

but here's the thing - although he always says I can get as dressed or undressed as I want - he is totally prepared to work through clothing if that is what I want. In 17 years I've never felt comfortable to take my panties off. So I don't. He moves the fabric around. But that is my choice. The rest of me is naked, but the only part he uncovers is the part he is working on. Now, I live in a colder part of the country - I'm not talking about southern Texas in the boiling heat and humidity. Blankets are nice, even with a heated room. 

When I arrive, he asks me if I have special concerns, anything that needs extra massage. then he leaves the room and closes the door while I undress and get on the table. I cover myself with a blanket. He returns. I have seen other masseuse and it is always the same. No-one else is allowed in, either, unless it is a dual massage or a public space (airport neck massage). Then he starts massaging, going systematically, usually starting with feet. As he moves up, he uncovers, but as he finishes a body part, he covers it back up (covers the right leg, moves to the left leg). When it is time for me to roll over, he lifts the sheets like a tent and looks away. I roll over, and lay down, and he starts the same process, usually with my feet first. When he does my stomach, which he doesn't always, he has a towel over my breasts and the sheet turned down at my hips. My private areas are never exposed, and if he massages around my breasts then he just touches the edge of the chest under the towel. There is no reason to massage breasts as they have no muscle tissue - only the chest wall muscles need massage. My nipples are never exposed. it keeps everyone safe. 

Sometimes massage does happen to stir sexual feelings. After all, you have someone touching your whole body. However, that is not unexpected. What would be unexpected would be to act on it. 

I recommend this husband book a massage with someone he trusts and see what it is like, and then book a massage with her masseuse and see if he likes it. Then he can talk to his wife from a position of experience. Often times if you feel creeped out, then there is something to it, but on the other hand, maybe trust is the issue.


----------



## Rob3188

Hi all,

and here I was thinking I was over reacting and thinking it's just me.
I am so glad I have found this site as I am having real difficulty dealing with what I am going through right now...

Here a little back ground on me...
Got divorced after 15 years of marriage and 3 kids.
Ended up leaving the UK to live in Germany with a lovely lady whom I had met a long time ago before I got married to my ex. 
Now re-married living happily until this happened...
My other half suffers from Fibromyalgia and has so for 20 odd years. She has tried all sorts of medicines and Doctors to deal with it but none help.
She is a very spiritual person (I am not). She does yoga which helps her a little, then one day she wasnt feeling well and went to our Docs. She was told that there is an Indian chap who runs an Healthcare in India offering Ayurvedic treatments.
Anyway, he is visiting Germany and one of the places he will be is just around the corner from where I live at a yoga studio.
My wife contacted this studio and was advised that what is on offer isnt a chat but a massage called a chavutti thirumal massage and it would be carried out by the indian chap and the guy who owns the yoga studio as he had been to India and learnt the technique and had been certified by this Indian chap.
Well, to be honest I didnt think much of it... until I found out that it is a massage where the person receiving the massage is naked and lies on the floor on a mat whilst the person carrying out the massage , massages the person with their feet...
The little info I found on the internet I noticed that the person receiving the massage has a Tanga type undewear on, more like a thin towel between butt crack and legs whilst lying on their front, which then gets tied so that they are covered up whilst on their front. I thought... ok, I can deal with that although she would be lying there bareing breasts whilst on her back, which dont get massaged direktly, but do get touched on the rib side and inbetween.
Well, when I found out how this guy does the massages I found out that whilst on her front she is not covered up at all the tanga type towel is between her legs but not covering anything until she turns over and she doesnt tie it up, he does it. Also I dont know if you agree, but when one is lying on their front with the legs slightly appart, you cant tell me that nothing can be seen, specially when you need to move like into a prone position so that the side of the legs can be massaged...
I was fuming when I found this out, unfortunately it was just before I drove her to the yoga studio. I carried on and went on to my therapy session to think that when it was done in an hour I could go pick her up on the way home... nope, this massage took a total of bloody 3 hours... now I have no reason to misstrust her, but I find it really difficult to deal with this, specially now as she found out our neighbour goes there also and strangly enough her other half doesnt like it, further more our neighbour had invited this chap round to a party of hers, as she also attends his yoga sessions... My response to this was I would not like it, I dont like the fact that she gets massaged by this guy and then to befriend him and invite him to our home NO! She didnt understand me. I got the same as many others have said here... ie you dont mind me going to the doctor or physio therapist, why should it be different going to the yoga guy?
I have tried to explain, that nudity for me is more of an intimate thing. Again...why should a yoga guy with massage certification should be different to a doc?
Why invite him to a party, you dont invite your doctor? Well, if I would go to this place in india to take part in the healthcenter and should meet our doctor who goes there (the doc is a woman by the way) and get to know her better I might...
It just seemed to me, no matter what I said or expressed my dislike, she doesnt understand it. I even found a woman in our area, ok given, its a bit of a drive, but still, a woman which would put my mind at peace... Nope, the woman might not be able to apply the preasure needed like this chap can. Plus she would feel guilty that he had spent an hour explaining the masssage to her and finding out about her complaints, whithout charging for it... my answer was, well he probably does that to all new customers...furthermore, he told her about his personal loss of a child and marriage and apparently this was how he discovered the Indian way of life and learnt I presume yoga and the way to deliver this type of massage... - Sorry but why would you tell a stranger about your woes, to me it seemed oh heres a nice lady, lets see how she responds to shedding sympathy. Then whilst massaging her legs, which according to my wife was quite painfull, he asked, who did you try to run away from as a child... I mean ffks what is that about, my wife said that brought tears to her eyes....
Well, lets come to an end... This has caused a major ruck between me and my wife, she doesnt understand my point of view, she wont go to the woman masseus and is looking at getting the double massage (although she says she doesnt want to :-/ I'm not daft).
So, how is one to deal with this...It is really doing my head in, it is causing bad vibes at home where her kids are noticing it (not that her eldest is bothered as hes more interested in himself) but the youngest I think may suffer if this should split me and her up....
Damn... that went on a bit... look forward to your replies...
Rgds
Rob


----------



## 269370

Rob3188 said:


> Hi all,
> 
> 
> 
> and here I was thinking I was over reacting and thinking it's just me.
> 
> I am so glad I have found this site as I am having real difficulty dealing with what I am going through right now...
> 
> 
> 
> Here a little back ground on me...
> 
> Got divorced after 15 years of marriage and 3 kids.
> 
> Ended up leaving the UK to live in Germany with a lovely lady whom I had met a long time ago before I got married to my ex.
> 
> Now re-married living happily until this happened...
> 
> My other half suffers from Fibromyalgia and has so for 20 odd years. She has tried all sorts of medicines and Doctors to deal with it but none help.
> 
> She is a very spiritual person (I am not). She does yoga which helps her a little, then one day she wasnt feeling well and went to our Docs. She was told that there is an Indian chap who runs an Healthcare in India offering Ayurvedic treatments.
> 
> Anyway, he is visiting Germany and one of the places he will be is just around the corner from where I live at a yoga studio.
> 
> My wife contacted this studio and was advised that what is on offer isnt a chat but a massage called a chavutti thirumal massage and it would be carried out by the indian chap and the guy who owns the yoga studio as he had been to India and learnt the technique and had been certified by this Indian chap.
> 
> Well, to be honest I didnt think much of it... until I found out that it is a massage where the person receiving the massage is naked and lies on the floor on a mat whilst the person carrying out the massage , massages the person with their feet...
> 
> The little info I found on the internet I noticed that the person receiving the massage has a Tanga type undewear on, more like a thin towel between butt crack and legs whilst lying on their front, which then gets tied so that they are covered up whilst on their front. I thought... ok, I can deal with that although she would be lying there bareing breasts whilst on her back, which dont get massaged direktly, but do get touched on the rib side and inbetween.
> 
> Well, when I found out how this guy does the massages I found out that whilst on her front she is not covered up at all the tanga type towel is between her legs but not covering anything until she turns over and she doesnt tie it up, he does it. Also I dont know if you agree, but when one is lying on their front with the legs slightly appart, you cant tell me that nothing can be seen, specially when you need to move like into a prone position so that the side of the legs can be massaged...
> 
> I was fuming when I found this out, unfortunately it was just before I drove her to the yoga studio. I carried on and went on to my therapy session to think that when it was done in an hour I could go pick her up on the way home... nope, this massage took a total of bloody 3 hours... now I have no reason to misstrust her, but I find it really difficult to deal with this, specially now as she found out our neighbour goes there also and strangly enough her other half doesnt like it, further more our neighbour had invited this chap round to a party of hers, as she also attends his yoga sessions... My response to this was I would not like it, I dont like the fact that she gets massaged by this guy and then to befriend him and invite him to our home NO! She didnt understand me. I got the same as many others have said here... ie you dont mind me going to the doctor or physio therapist, why should it be different going to the yoga guy?
> 
> I have tried to explain, that nudity for me is more of an intimate thing. Again...why should a yoga guy with massage certification should be different to a doc?
> 
> Why invite him to a party, you dont invite your doctor? Well, if I would go to this place in india to take part in the healthcenter and should meet our doctor who goes there (the doc is a woman by the way) and get to know her better I might...
> 
> It just seemed to me, no matter what I said or expressed my dislike, she doesnt understand it. I even found a woman in our area, ok given, its a bit of a drive, but still, a woman which would put my mind at peace... Nope, the woman might not be able to apply the preasure needed like this chap can. Plus she would feel guilty that he had spent an hour explaining the masssage to her and finding out about her complaints, whithout charging for it... my answer was, well he probably does that to all new customers...furthermore, he told her about his personal loss of a child and marriage and apparently this was how he discovered the Indian way of life and learnt I presume yoga and the way to deliver this type of massage... - Sorry but why would you tell a stranger about your woes, to me it seemed oh heres a nice lady, lets see how she responds to shedding sympathy. Then whilst massaging her legs, which according to my wife was quite painfull, he asked, who did you try to run away from as a child... I mean ffks what is that about, my wife said that brought tears to her eyes....
> 
> Well, lets come to an end... This has caused a major ruck between me and my wife, she doesnt understand my point of view, she wont go to the woman masseus and is looking at getting the double massage (although she says she doesnt want to :-/ I'm not daft).
> 
> So, how is one to deal with this...It is really doing my head in, it is causing bad vibes at home where her kids are noticing it (not that her eldest is bothered as hes more interested in himself) but the youngest I think may suffer if this should split me and her up....
> 
> Damn... that went on a bit... look forward to your replies...
> 
> Rgds
> 
> Rob



Yeah in Germany they are obsessed about nudity and Ayurvedic, spiritual and homeopathetic medicine....

The first time my wife ever had a massage, the guy spent about 45 minutes massaging the insides of her thighs and her buttocks. She didn’t know any better any thought that’s what was supposed to happen...

Not really sure how to deal with your situation in your case. You could just put your foot down (on her, and massage her yourself ):

It is either the Indian guy in a g string or you. Say you don’t have the money to waste on this?

These massage videos you have been watching...it doesn’t mean it will be exactly like that in reality. The massage videos I watch, most end with a happy ending, even though in reality the ending is usually quite sad 



Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## personofinterest

morningdew said:


> This is why I prefer to have a female masseuse LOL.
> But seriously tho', usually bra off is fine but never heard of the total naked thing. I agree with Sister, she might thinks it's normal but believe me it doesn't sounds like a 'regular' massage.
> 
> I'm in Asia, and no we don't strip butt naked <a href="http://talkaboutmarriage.com/images/smilies/smile.gif" border="0" alt="" title="Smile" ></a>


This

If the massage is truly therapeutic there is no reason your wife can't have a female masseuse


----------



## 269370

personofinterest said:


> This
> 
> If the massage is truly therapeutic there is no reason your wife can't have a female masseuse


Who could still look inside her nunu...is there no way to keep the knickers on? Or does it destroy all the health benefits immediately :scratchhead:?


----------



## Deejo

Nine year old thread ... just sayin'.


----------

