# How did you get her to forgive



## jdesey (Dec 6, 2015)

I have posted this before. My SO of 2 yeArs and I broke off our engagement last fall and are on and off since. We have had a lot of talks lately and the bottom line is that she's still very hurt from my screw ups. 

I failed financially and we got evicted. She had to go to work. I left her to figure outfit all on her own. I gambled away $$ in stock market. And more. 
The bottom line is that I didn't make her and us enough of a priority. 

I got out and got a new job. Ive been there for anything she needs. 

She is trying but says it could take a year to forgive. I see progress when she is sweet and loving. 

What can I do to prove I'm sorry. To show her I've changed.


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

Marry her.


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## ThreeStrikes (Aug 11, 2012)

Omg


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## jdesey (Dec 6, 2015)

I want to marry her. She won't put the ring back on. She's so hurt. I mean we had a wedding date and it got canceled cause of $. What girl wouldn't be crushed. 

Help. I need advice


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## SecondTime'Round (Jan 15, 2015)

When did the escorts come into play? Before or after you met her?


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## jdesey (Dec 6, 2015)

Oh god. That was 5 years before we met and it only went on for 3 months. Never have done it since


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## Relationship Teacher (Jan 3, 2016)

jdesey said:


> She is trying but says it could take a year to forgive. I see progress when she is sweet and loving.
> 
> What can I do to prove I'm sorry. To show her I've changed.


1. Stop trying to prove it. The onus is on her to forgive. But she has to forgive the pain she felt due to your actions.
2. Be the best you possibly can be. Do this for every menial task. Be the best listener. Be the best sweeper, etc.

Keep your apologies short and sweet. A true apology is the corrective action. You have to be the best person possible, and it is up for others to see that. When individuals beg for forgiveness, they are disrespecting themselves, the offended partner, and the relationship.

If it keeps coming up, just be there to listen. Be there with that arm on her back.


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## Mr The Other (Feb 1, 2014)

jdesey said:


> I have posted this before. My SO of 2 yeArs and I broke off our engagement last fall and are on and off since. We have had a lot of talks lately and the bottom line is that she's still very hurt from my screw ups.
> 
> I failed financially and we got evicted. She had to go to work. I left her to figure outfit all on her own. I gambled away $$ in stock market. And more.
> The bottom line is that I didn't make her and us enough of a priority.
> ...


First up, if she is a reasonable attractive and responsible woman, then she could do a lot better. 

You are emotionally needy and irresponsible. So, stop being emotionally needy and start being responsible. That way, you will be a man worth her while if she decides she wants a relationship with you. And if she does not, you will be find and she will be fine.


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## staarz21 (Feb 6, 2013)

Let's see....

She communicates with her ex to include sexual talk and she has told you she will NOT stop the communication. 

She said she needs her ex in her life. 

Her ex is the one that bailed you out of the financial ruin you got into with her. 

She put her ex before you. 

You are completely irresponsible and she knows this. She doesn't care if you leave. She even said as much when she told you she would not stop communication with her ex!!! 


Dude, let it go. She is not into you. She is into her ex.


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## Blondilocks (Jul 4, 2013)

It doesn't matter how many forums you post this on - the advice is the same.


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## tripad (Apr 18, 2014)

blueinbr said:


> Marry her.


If she's smart , she will not .
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## tripad (Apr 18, 2014)

staarz21 said:


> Let's see....
> 
> She communicates with her ex to include sexual talk and she has told you she will NOT stop the communication.
> 
> ...


He failed her . 

Her ex bailed him out . what a nice ex !

Don't blame her . 

_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## tripad (Apr 18, 2014)

jdesey said:


> I want to marry her. She won't put the ring back on. She's so hurt. I mean we had a wedding date and it got canceled cause of $. What girl wouldn't be crushed.
> 
> Help. I need advice


Yes she's crushed . if she has a brain , she will leave you . 

You should learn n don't do that with the next gf .
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

I thought you moved out?


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## jdesey (Dec 6, 2015)

I did move out. I'm obviously not done with her. I screwed up so bad. We are trying to start over. I don't know if I'll ever get back the woman I fell in love with


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

Are you and her even talking or texting?


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## jdesey (Dec 6, 2015)

Yes. We text and talk all day. We see each other every night. Then I go to my place. I am staying w her thurs fri and sat cause my place is not available.


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## Mr The Other (Feb 1, 2014)

jdesey said:


> Yes. We text and talk all day. We see each other every night. Then I go to my place. I am staying w her thurs fri and sat cause my place is not available.


From this, I take it you still need her emotionally and practically. This is not appealing to a woman and would not be good for for. Again, sort your life out first and leave her to move on with her life.


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## Ynot (Aug 26, 2014)

jdesey said:


> I did move out. I'm obviously not done with her. I screwed up so bad. We are trying to start over. I don't know if I'll ever get back the woman I fell in love with


No! YOU are trying to start over, she probably can't figure out how to be done with you. Get over it and move on, you are wasting your time and her time and every body else's time.


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