# Can someone explain this???



## kevsand718 (Jun 3, 2010)

Okay, I'm trying to understand something here. Maybe one of you veterans in here can help. Okay I have posted in the past that my wife has a low sex drive. She has little desire for lovemaking. We planned a day once a week but then both agreed that we did not want to feel committed to a set day. It was just uncomfortable when that day came around and you knew what was to come that night whether you were in the mood or not. Anyway here is what's happening. 

If I playfully ask my wife if she is in the mood on any given day or time of day. I get rejected. Okay i can understand this. We have 4 kids. However when I do this my plan is more to put it in her head that I'm in the mood and maybe later that night we can revisit and things will happen. It never really works though. Other times I will initiate in the evening when we retire to the bedroom and I will usually get "do you want me to help you" My answer is "no, I want us to pleasure each other". I will either then drop it and go to sleep or let her get me off only which isn't much fun really. So now here is the kicker. Are you ready? I am a very sexually active sleeper. meaning i have erotic dreams and I move my hands a lot and talk in my sleep. My wife has found this as a turn on. In the beginning she wouldn't even wake me and when I started talking and moving she would put my hands on her body and let them work her to orgasm. I would find out the next morning. I told her that it's not fair to me and that she should wake me. So now she does which is great cause she is turned on and the sex is great for both of us. My problem is why does she get turned on while i'm sleeping but when I initiate she is not in the mood at all????? I don't get it. I asked her what it is about my talking and moving that turns her on and she said "I don't really know, I guess it's the dirty talk and moving". I tried all of this when initiating and it doesn't work. So why does it work when i'm asleep??? Does anybody understand this???


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