# Just need someone else's opionion other than family!



## Mother&Wife21 (Jan 4, 2010)

My husband and i met back in 2007 a month after that we were married, yes i know it was fast but we were both head over heals in love with each other and knew its what we both wanted, he was in the air force and i was working full time at a casino! We were very outgoing and just loved life, a month later we found out i was expecting and he decided he was going to switch over and join the army ( something he was in the process of doing before we met) so a month after finding out we were pregnant he left for the army for 7-8 months of training, i saw him a few times in between and he was there for the birth. After we had our baby girl we got stationed in GA and moved there and he went back to work and i stayed at home with kaleigh, i just couldn't imagine leaving her in a daycare i wanted to be there for everything, well its almost 2 years later and my husband told me last night that hes unhappy that he isn't in love with me anymore and he thinks in this marriage for all the wrong reasons he thinks hes still here is because he doesn't want to lose him daughter. He says im not the same person he met over 2 years ago that i have changed alot and hes just unhappy and not in love with me, he says he loves and cares about me alot but not in love. He wont tell me to leave he said its my decision. I want to be that person he first fell in love with trust me i do i miss that person, so im doing everything in my power to make things right again im bettering my self and trying to save our marriage because divorce is just not an option for me right now im not going to walk away knowing there is some sort of hope still there. Im going out to get a job iv pretty much changed my whole outlook on life, i guess like a wake up call. Im just wondering if im wasting my time and him im wondering if he could ever have those feelings for me again, he told me last night he doesn't know if he could, i guess its better than saying he cant and wont ever. I just dont want to give up. Hes my future and i never want another man to replace him ever! Any advice would help and if you have any questions please ask! Thank you for reading and im taking it one day at a time... We have a date Friday night something we havent done in years. I hope it goes great!


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## DawnD (Sep 23, 2009)

It sounds like you two are talking about whats going on and trying to make changes, so thats always good!! Has he been acting sad lately or more frustrated?? Do you think there could be more stress from work weighing on his decisions right now? 

Try date nights, try to find something you both love doing together just the two of you and show him that you want him. Thank him for doing little things that he may think go unnoticed. Ask him his opinion on things ,like which lingerie to wear  Think about how you two interact and see if there is any communication that needs to change!


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## sisters359 (Apr 9, 2009)

> Im just wondering if im wasting my time


It will never be a waste of time if you are doing it for yourself, so you can be a happier adult and better mom. If you are doing it ONLY to win him back, it isn't going to hold and you will have to rebuild yourself yet again if things don't work out. In other words, do it for yourself. No matter what happens in your marriage, you will always be better off for it.

And read about "love," because you cannot be in love with someone you have known only 1 month. You simply do not know them well enough, haven't seen them in enough situations, etc. That first 12-18 months is infatuation and lust, and if there is not a deeper connection--one based on many shared experiences and conversations--then there is nothing left when the infatuation fades. I'm sorry if that is what has happened to you; you can keep working on yourself, work on the marriage, and things may work out. Good luck.


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## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

sisters359 said:


> It will never be a waste of time if you are doing it for yourself, so you can be a happier adult and better mom. If you are doing it ONLY to win him back, it isn't going to hold and you will have to rebuild yourself yet again if things don't work out. In other words, do it for yourself. No matter what happens in your marriage, you will always be better off for it.


:iagree:


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