# So I'm cooking now.



## calamityjim (Jul 18, 2014)

I used to think I had a great marriage before I began to really see all of our issues. We're working on some things, and things are going really well.

One of my changes is to man up. Previously, I was trying to let her decide everything so that she could have what she wanted and be happy. But I've now realized that what she has really wanted was for me to assume the leadership role.

We have constant dinnertime battles. From planning to shopping to cooking to eating, there's drama at every step.

All the planning had previously fallen on her, then we would shop as a family. She would come home at 5pm and cook, and the kids would undoubtedly fight about eating salad or peas or whatever. On more than one occasion, this caused her serious emotional distress to the point of tears.

New approach: I plan, I shop on the way home from work, I cook. They eat it or they go hungry. 

This is a big alpha step for me, as I'm now running mealtime.
It stops us from _all_ going grocery shopping where we inevitably overspend.
It takes a huge load of stress off my wife, which she can thank me for later in the evening. :smthumbup:
My wife is debilitatingly picky. Her view of what constitutes "food" has always been very narrow, so this gives us a chance to branch out.

So... As a "regular" dad, my cooking is pretty much limited to stuff that starts with browning ground beef. Tacos, Hamburger Helper, spaghetti, or I can fire up the grill.

Surely you guys have some good food sites in your back pockets. I've thought about emeals too, but I don't know if I want to be _that_ structured. Bottom line, I'm no chef, but I can follow a recipe. I'm going to ease some of the newness onto my inherently picky kids. Last night's battle was baked beans. How do you not like something with 12 cups of brown sugar?? 

Thanks.


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## Almostrecovered (Jul 14, 2011)

go to americastestkitchen.com

sign up for the free one month trial member ship that allows you access to all their sites (America's Test Kitchen, Cook's Illustrated, and Cook's Country)

For the free trial you will have access to all of their videos (6 seasons of Cook's Country, 14 seasons of ATK and all of the recipes from their 20+ year magazine Cook's Illustrated)

It is by FAR the best cooking instructional show ever made (including Good Eats which is very funny and entertaining too)
They use science to figure out the best ways to make traditional recipes even better and simpler. They often test a recipe out in 100+ different ways to get it right

If you dont like the instruction then be sure to cancel the recurring membership before the month is out but to me the $80 or so is totally worth the price for the year's subscription
My cooking game this past year has skyrocketed since using their services

They also have an online cooking school which may be of interest to you


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## Almostrecovered (Jul 14, 2011)

oh, and the food is downright amazing

all the recipes I've followed have been downright good to drop dead incredibly delicious (and I can't believe I made this)


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## DoF (Mar 27, 2014)

You call that cooking OP?

hehe

I recently started cooking myself. But mostly do whole meats (steak, pork loins, whole chicken/breast).....nothing grinded or who knows what and Veggies and Fruit.

I have caught a cast iron bug as well.....well to be honest, I got sick and tired of buying new pans every couple of months (cheap and expensive ones). They all seemed to get ruined in no time/temporary. But eventually fell in love with the taste of food from cast iron skillet. We have like 5-6 now (all sizes). They are dirt cheap, last forever and will hand them down to my grand kids one day. 

NOTHING like an egg on a cast iron skillet.....

I also took up Charcoal grill cooking as well/Smoking. 

REALLY REALLY enjoying it. It also takes a LOT of pressure off my wife and I started helping her with planning etc as well.

Last year we also started to involve ALL of our kids with helping my wife cook and it turned out really REALLY great.

Regardless, good work OP. Just be careful with how much work you take on. Key is to keep the balance at 50/50 or around there. Your situation seems a bit extreme on your end right now hehe.

I did take over all of Camp cooking though, mostly to give my wife a break and time to relax more. She loves it and I also enjoy helping her and cooking as well (kids help too).

Campsite food has become amazing......went from hot dogs/hamburger theme to gourmet meals (Smoked Pork/Sweet potatos.......Steaks/Pinapple etc.

Ummmm


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Love to cook. So much joy. 

Get online and watch videos of things you enjoy eating and learn. Then do.


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## norajane (Feb 7, 2012)

I sometimes use Eatingwell.com. Most of the recipes are simple and tasty.

Once you get the basics of cooking down, then you can do more experimenting with spices. Eventually, you get to the point you can look in your fridge and pantry and start creating things yourself.


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## EnjoliWoman (Jul 2, 2012)

Deceptively Delicious: Simple Secrets to Get
Your Kids Eating Good Food by Jessica Seinfeld (yes, Jerry Seinfeld's wife).

I don't use all of her tips but I have found there are a ton of ways to "hide" veggies. Also - your wife CRIES because the kids fuss? Good grief, NOONE knows how to put their foot down around there, do they? Suck it UP, woman!

Studies show it takes 17 exposures to foods before kids will enjoy it (or never will). My rule, which works OK (she's not the best but a lot better) is she has to TRY one fork full. Every time. She hates peas, brussels sprouts, etc. but if I make it, she has to at least have one decent bite of it. She used to hate baked beans, too - now she likes them. I was impressed that she tried sushi. Didn't like it but that's OK.

I also try to have other things on her plate I know she likes - for balance. Of if I know she just hates it (like the brussels sprouts) I will make something else that is her favorite. And the veggies she DOES like we eat often.

Instead of adults being stuck eating "kid food" they need to be exposed to a wide variety of foods. Otherwise when they begin to make their own choices it will be nothing but processed junk.

A few ideas that are kid friendly:
BBQ chicken - just put chicken breasts in a shallow frying pan - rub bottom with olive oil to prevent sticking - pour about 2 table spoons of BBQ sauce on each breast, cover with a lid and let cook for about 20 minutes and check for doneness. While they cook, put a green veggie on the stove they like if there is one. If not, make broccoli and sprinkle (don't cover - just sprinkle) grated cheddar on it. I often serve corn - canned or on the cob - with this. A side of natural applesauce and some milk and you have all of the food groups covered.

Faux quiche - buy a premade deep dish pie crust. Scramble 6 eggs or so in a bowl with some milk. Fill the crust with leftovers - any veggie or meat, really that seems good together. I like broccoli/ham (or pre-cooked bacon bits)/cheddar or chicken/swiss/spinach. Kids WILL eat spinach like this. Canned or frozen chopped - drain it and use half and re-freeze the other half for another quiche or make two and freeze one. Fill up the pie crust with the fillings - you can layer it or toss it together first - doesn't matter (except I do mix the spinach into the egg mixture to distribute evenly. Pour egg mixture over top - if you need a bit more, crack another egg or two. Bake for about an hour or until the center doesn't jiggle like liquid. Serve with a mixed fruit salad tossed with vanilla low-fat yogurt (also a great dessert). Again - all food groups are represented.

My kid used to not even like RICE. I mean - who doesn't like rice? Now one of her favorites: Buy broccoli slaw (grated broccoli stems, carrots and purple cabbage) and saute in olive oil while cooking rice (or boil in bag if you must). I do this separately because the slaw cooks down to half the size - toss it into a large serving or mixing bowl. Get turkey kielbasa - I like butterball; less fat than Echrich - slice (or cut lengthwise first for smaller pieces if kids are young enough for choking hazard) and saute in same pan you used for slaw. When they are heated and browned a bit, toss them in the bowl. When rice is done add that, mix it all up. Serve with more unsweetened applesauce as a side. Again you have all of the food groups here in one dish. I have switched over to half white/half brown rice but can't quite get her to enjoy wild rice. (I also put broccoli slaw in spaghetti sauce to increase veggie content).

Make extra rice and save for next night - make a tetrazinni - use a can of cream of celery (or chicken or mushroom depending on your taste - I use 98% fat free/low sodium versions) mix with rice, mix in any veggie chopped small (can be assorted left overs!) and chicken or turkey (I use left overs from a roasted chicken earlier in the week), add in a cup of grated cheddar, stir it all together and pop in the oven to heat through. I save the "heels" of wheat bread, dry them on the counter and put in the food processor for bread crumbs and sprinkle on top with some grated parmasean - makes a nice thin crunchy crust. But not required.

Another dish that I was surprised she liked - winter squash. Cut acorn or hubbard squash in half and remove seeds, put in an oven safe dish with a little water and cover. Cook for 45 minutes or until flesh soft. While that cooks, brown sausage until it crumbles and drain. When squash are done, flip them over and fill the cavity with sausage. Top with a tablespoon of brown sugar. It has a savory sweet flavor and every kid who has had it loves it. Oddly enough.

You cook spaghetti squash the same way but let it cool a bit and use a fork to "fluff" it into strings like spaghetti. I mix it half/half with angel hair pasta because she caught on when I used it alone with the sauce. 

Those were some go-to quick dinners that she liked. I've branched out a little since then. (PS everything is cooked at 350 that I have listed here.)


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## EnjoliWoman (Jul 2, 2012)

Almost recovered is probably cringing at my recipes because he's a much better cook LOL


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## Almostrecovered (Jul 14, 2011)

everyone has to start somewhere


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## Blondilocks (Jul 4, 2013)

Did you really use TWELVE cups of brown sugar? It's none of my business, but just how many kids are you feeding?

Boneless, skinless chicken breasts will be a life saver. They cook quickly and can go Italian (Chicken Parmigiana);, Mexican (enchiladas,burritos,tacos); Chinese (stir-frys) or plain old American in the blink of an eye.

Good luck and good on you!


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## over20 (Nov 15, 2013)

Eggs are a great way to feed the family.....high in protein, cheap and easy.....you can make them for a quiche, egg salad sandwiches with soup, or in a casserole...

Also if you buy a whole chicken, wrap it up with butter, seasonings and bake it....that can be the first meal...(baked chicken with mashed potatoes) and then the leftover chicken can be used in sandwiches or casseroles and the bone can be boiled down with an onion so you have a ready to go broth for homemade soup....

I buy turkey and ham year round and can get about 2 meals and a soup out of each.......and they are all easy to make don't feel intimidated by cooking them!


good luck!


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## Philat (Sep 12, 2013)

Almostrecovered said:


> go to americastestkitchen.com
> 
> sign up for the free one month trial member ship that allows you access to all their sites (America's Test Kitchen, Cook's Illustrated, and Cook's Country)
> 
> ...


You will never go wrong here. I volunteered to be a recipe tester for Cook's Country.


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## Almostrecovered (Jul 14, 2011)

Philat said:


> You will never go wrong here. I volunteered to be a recipe tester for Cook's Country.


if you get this I will hate you from sheer jealousy


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Congratulations on stepping up! And on saying eat or go hungry. That is SO important!

Get lots of cans of cream of mushroom and cream of chicken soup. You can use them on everything. Put some uncooked pasta in a casserole dish, throw some chicken pieces on top, mix up the cream of chicken soup in a separate bowl with 2 cans of water (to help with the pasta), and pour on top. Bake at 350 for an hour. Perfectly seasoned, easy to cook. You can even throw a can of peas or green beans in.


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## Akinaura (Dec 6, 2011)

I second turnera on the cans of cream of mushroom and cream of chicken! These are my bases for a LOT of my recipes.

One of my favorites to make is Upside Down Pot Pie. A bag of frozen veggies, chicken cut into bite size pieces, and one large can of cream of chicken. For flavor, you can always toss in a packet of chicken gravy. Toss all that into a pot of boiling water, cover, and cook until the meat is done. For the bread part, two boxes of stuffing cooked a few minutes before you are ready to serve the other part. My husband isn't picky, but my 5 yr old is, and she eats this down quickly while asking for seconds.

Look into maybe grabbing a book of 30 min meals. They usually are simple, provide the basic nutrients, AND don't have you searching for some odd spice that nearly no one carries. As a military wife, getting dinner cooked fast is a bonus so I can have more time with the family.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## commonsenseisn't (Aug 13, 2014)

Calamityjim

You're on the right track. I learned the same lesson a long time ago with my wife. She does not like to cook and I don't mind it, so I do it as a loving service to buy her more time to do what she likes. I play a leadership role in the endeavor and make sure everyone knows it's the "manly" thing to do. 

I put together a three ring binder, gave it an ostentatious title, and I frequently add a new favorite recipe to it. I only add recipes that are stunningly delicious and easy to make. Though I'm a rank amateur I sportingly make a big deal of claiming to be the best chef who ever walked the planet and whatever foolish bluster inspires me. Friends and family have fun with it at my expense which is great.

My wife would be horrified to know that I recently overheard her tell two other ladies what an incredible cook I am. When friends or family see me reach for the three ring binder they know something special is about to be created. It's becoming a beloved family tradition and I love to do it for them.


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

And don't forget the crock pot. Put any seasoned meat in there with potatoes, onions, carrots, etc., a little water, more seasoning, and when you get home, dinner's done.


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## NobodySpecial (Nov 22, 2013)

EnjoliWoman said:


> Deceptively Delicious: Simple Secrets to Get
> Your Kids Eating Good Food by Jessica Seinfeld (yes, Jerry Seinfeld's wife) .I don't use all of her tips but I have found there are a ton of ways to "hide" veggies


I have to disagree with this. If you put a tablespoon of cauliflower puree into a brownie, it is still a brownie, and does nothing to instill the important eating HABITS.



> . Also - your wife CRIES because the kids fuss? Good grief, NOONE knows how to put their foot down around there, do they? Suck it UP, woman!


Amen to this.


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## NobodySpecial (Nov 22, 2013)

turnera said:


> And don't forget the crock pot. Put any seasoned meat in there with potatoes, onions, carrots, etc., a little water, more seasoning, and when you get home, dinner's done.


My favorite crock pot book is Cooking Light, not because it is light but because it is yummy. But ain't you a lucky devil, OP, since all their recipes are online.


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## clipclop2 (Aug 16, 2013)

Cooking Light is a great magazine too


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

I remember going to visit friends in Dallas about 7-8 years ago, who were having a new house built, and she had this little desk area built into the kitchen...no bookshelves...I asked her where she was keeping her cookbooks, and she said she gave them all away. The desk was for where she kept her laptop. I was like what?! She said she had no need for cookbooks any more, since she had access to so many recipes online. I was like, wow, I REALLY need to come into this century.


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## clipclop2 (Aug 16, 2013)

I like books. Easier to add notes. And I do computers for a living.


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## NobodySpecial (Nov 22, 2013)

I look at cookbooks the way men look at porn.


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## vellocet (Oct 18, 2013)

NobodySpecial said:


> I look at cookbooks the way men look at porn.


With your d!ck out?


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