# I think I'm about to cheat on my husband



## Anomnom

I've just found this forum while searching for other advice or info for my situation. So here goes..

I've been married to my husband for almost 7 years. We have a 9 month old baby.

He has no libido whatsoever. I have a high one. He'd be happy to only have sex a couple of times a year, if ever. I'd like it at least a few times a week. We've only had sex 3 times this year, all me initiating. In the 8 years we've been together, he's only initiated sex about 5 times, seriously. We've fought about it a lot..that is me starting off asking why he never initiates and it escalates into fighting and him promising he'll change and ask for it more. He then gets over affectionate for a few days thinking this fixes everything, but still doesn't initiate sex.. same scenario over and over and over for our whole marriage.

He's never really been into sex but due to living with his parents for the first 4 years of the marriage (in his country) which made intimacy difficult, it didn't seem a huge issue.. until we moved here and lived alone, where it became abundantly clear that he just isn't interested in sex. A few months ago he finally admitted to me that he doesn't like sex. After me questioning him for years and him reassuring me that he likes it, he'll change, etc etc, he finally told me the simple truth. He won't get counselling and he won't have his hormones checked because he thinks he's completely normal.

If we didn't have a baby I think I would end things. He is from a different country and if I left him, he would have little choice but to move back to his country as he is not independent and wouldn't know how to live here alone. I don't want our baby to grow up without a dad, and he is the best dad in the world. 

So, after all that, I'm on the verge of cheating on him. I have never ever cheated on anyone and have always been quite judgemental of cheaters, thinking there is never justification to do that. But now here I am very seriously contemplating it  I met someone recently who is interested in taking things further then friendship with me and frankly it feels great to actually have someone interested in me sexually after so many years of rejection and disinterest from my husband. I feel like this is not who I want to be..married and considering physically being with someone else. I know there is no justification in cheating..only a reason. 

How is it fair to be in a marriage that has no intimacy though? If your partner knows you are unhappy with something in the marriage, shouldn't they at least make an effort to fix things? How can you reaffirm your love and commitment without sex/making love.. making dinner and doing chores only goes so far IYKWIM.

I've never been in a situation like this and feel like I am going to be physical with this other person to get what is missing in my marriage. I have asked my husband before if he would allow me to have sex with someone else and the thought horrified him (rightly so I suppose!), yet he won't have sex with me.. so I just don't know what to do..


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## This is me

The one thing that is certain and I think 99% of the people here would advise you is that you should not cheat on your husband.

End your marriage before you get into another relationship first.

Of course, this is the last resort if MC and trying everything you can to make it works fails.


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## livelaughlovenow

Absolutely agree with the above, end your marriage first... then seek love elsewhere. If you cannot do that, then sit down with your husband and talk through it, you may find reasons behind his "low libido" that can be fixed.


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## sinnister

I'm not going to be the one to condem you for feeling this way. I'm in your situation except I'm my wife is sexless. I would be lying if I said I didn't feel what you're feeling now.

I've also never admitted this to anyone or to this forum, but I did have an opportunity to cheat. It was as blunt and brazen of an offer I've ever received from a younger attractive single woman. The temptation was/is unbelievable. I know you want nothing more than to just feel that from your husband. But to have that option from somebody who actually wants you is more than flattering. It feels right. But wrong at the same time.

Bottom line is I never even responded. And I dont think you should either. I know you are suffering right now, and quite honestly I've been going through this for 6 years and now I know it will probably never improve. 

Whatever you decide to do I hope it works out. And I can't say you should consider him through this because somebody who pretty much cuts you off from intimacy for years is not considering you.


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## Anomnom

Thanks for your replies. I used to think the same thing about ending a relationship first..since I never could see how people could cheat.. but when a child is involved it is more complicated then to walk away. Apart from this issue, we do have a pretty good marriage.

I think he has low testosterone but he won't investigate this. I've also seen a counsellor privately (without hub knowing I went) who suggested he only thinks about sex for reproductive purposes which he seems to have 'learned' from his parents. And now we have a baby, perhaps that means he thinks there's no more need to have sex.. I just don't know, when he doesn't do anything to help the situation.


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## Anomnom

sinnister said:


> But to have that option from somebody who actually wants you is more than flattering. It feels right. But wrong at the same time.
> 
> And I can't say you should consider him through this because somebody who pretty much cuts you off from intimacy for years is not considering you.


Yes, this is exactly how I feel


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## Mistys dad

4 paragraphs about how it is his fault.

Then you say you have already found somebody who you have breached sexuality with.

You have already cheated. Cut your husband loose before you do more damage than you already have.


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## Almostrecovered

the right choice isn't usually the easiest choice


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## Anomnom

I was explaining the situation, not laying blame..read it how you will. I have been to counselling, he has done nothing to help our marriage is the only thing directly at 'fault'.


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## Toffer

Anom,

You said "but when a child is involved it is more complicated then to walk away"

If you cheat and your husband found out AND your marriage ended (however many weeks/months/years down the road from now) would you want your child to find out YOU were the cheater? Would you want to be viewed as the cheater by others?

Misty's dad is also correct. It sounds as if you're already involved in an Emotional Affair (read up on them) and your looking for the justification to take it physical.

Yes, you're in a bad marriage right now because it's not giving you what you need. There's alot of us out here whose spouses are low drive (LD) and we feel your pain.

As others have said, don't cheat. In the long run it won't be worth it.

Tell your husband again that he isn't giving you what you need and if he continues to refuse counseling and a medical doctor visit you'll have no choice but to end the marriage. Set a hard deadline of say a month for him to see his MD AND get his first counseling appointment. 

If he doesn't follow through, seperate from him and then start divorce proceedings. Eliminate the other man in you marriage now and never contact him again


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## anchorwatch

No healthy male, his age, doesn't want sex. There is something wrong with him, he needs to see an MD. 

It is understood that a marriage can not last without intimacy. Don't lose your self respect and cheat. End it fairly. Cheating will end it badly.


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## Almostrecovered

why don't you flat out ask him if you can see/have sex with other people?


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## Sara8

You have already cheated on your husband. 

If you are unhappy with your sex life let him go and move on. 

You seem to want the security of a faithful husband and good dad without any of the bad parts of a marriage like poor health. 

My sTBEH always had a low sex drive. I accepted it because I loved him. 

Than I found out that he cheated on me. 

That has in an odd way set me free. I can now leave him without needing to feel any guilt. 

I have to leave because I can never trust my STBEH again. 

Your husband will never trust you either, and your marriage will be a shell. 

With that said, verify that he is not cheating. 

A lot of men who experience low sex drive or erection issues blame it on the wife and need to test themselves by cheating. 

It is often easier for a man with sexual difficulties to get heated up during the fantasy of the illicit thrill of an affair. This further perpetuates blame on the faithful wife. 

Don't however accuse him as it will warn him. Simply start checking.


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## Sara8

anchorwatch said:


> No healthy male, his age, doesn't want sex. There is something wrong with him, he needs to see an MD.
> 
> It is understood that a marriage can not last without intimacy. Don't lose your self respect and cheat. End it fairly. Cheating will end it badly.


That is absolutely untrue. 

There are a lot of marriages in which men have erectile dysfunction and the woman do not cheat. 

The marriage vows say in sickness and in health. 

If it does turn out that this man has erectile dysfunction is she allowed to complain. 

There is more to a marriage than just sex. Otherwise no need to marry in the 21st century. Stay single.


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## Anomnom

Thanks Toffer for that thoughtful response.



Almostrecovered said:


> why don't you flat out ask him if you can see/have sex with other people?


I have brought it up several times and he is always horrified at the suggestion.

Sara - he's healthy as an ox..he possibly has psychological issues attached to sex or a hormone imbalance..but who knows since he wont investigate.


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## Hicks

Anomnom said:


> Thanks for your replies. I used to think the same thing about ending a relationship first..since I never could see how people could cheat.. but when a child is involved it is more complicated then to walk away. Apart from this issue, we do have a pretty good marriage.


You made the choice to have a child knowing how your husband was. 

Being a cheater is a terrible life for you and as a consequence will be a terrible life for your child. You cannot raise your child in any sense of a normal fashion in a long term sham of a marriage where you are sexually involved with other males.

You have a structural problem in your marriage, and the solution to cheat is a temporary band aid which will lead to nothing but problems for you and incalculable hurt for your husband.

You husband is not pulling his weight in the marriage. He is a grown man and is responsible for his actions. You owe it to him to tell him to fix his libido or get out of your life. If you leave him, and he suffers, that is his own doing and caused by him. You have a great set of reasons for leaving him. If you cheat, then 100% of the harm for the marriage and child is your fault and your responsibility.

Cheating is a major and completely unnecessary horrible decision you are fixing to make.


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## Cara

I know this is not exactly what you asked, but you said he is the best father. Part of his job as a father is to treat thechilds mother well and teach the child what a healthy marriage should be. He might be great with the 9 month old baby but consider what the child will see & hear in your marriage as it grows up.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## anchorwatch

Sara8 said:


> That is absolutely untrue.
> 
> There are a lot of marriages in which men have erectile dysfunction and the woman do not cheat.
> 
> The marriage vows say in sickness and in health.
> 
> If it does turn out that this man has erectile dysfunction is she allowed to complain.
> 
> There is more to a marriage than just sex. Otherwise no need to marry in the 21st century. Stay single.


Sara, how's this 'some form of intimacy' is that better? 

Who said cheat?

And you just described me. I got help and 'We're Back'


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## Almostrecovered

Anomnom said:


> I have brought it up several times and he is always horrified at the suggestion.


not surprising

and you still wish to inflict that sort of pain upon him

you will get caught and you will likely end up divorced anyways- so why put him through that pain? At least if you file now he may wake up enough to go get checked and make changes.


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## Drover

I'd say not only should you not cheat (ie. have a physical affair), but end the emotional affair with the other person now if you intend to stay in your marriage. And you need to have a serious talk with your husband. Not liking sex is not normal. Hormone issues will lower your drive, but not make you just "not like" it. It sounds like he needs therapy. If you have to, make it a condition of your marriage.


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## daisygirl 41

Please don't cheat on him. You will crush him if he ever finds out.
There are other ways to fix this. Cheating will not fix your marriage. It will make it unmeasurably worse.
Don't do it!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Almostrecovered

in all honesty, what would your game plan be?


have an affair with the one guy, get emotionally attached and then leave your husband for this man OR get caught and end up divorced

have multiple NSA affairs, possibly get an STD or pregnant and get caught and end up divorced

now granted there is a small chance you do not get caught or your husband looks the other way in ignorance. But then you live your life as a lie- ask any of the cheaters who post here, sure the affairs are exciting but they lived in fear and dual lives- that takes a huge toll on not only your health BUT also your family's well being- there's only so much you can invest in your family while you are having an affair- they will suffer EVEN IF YOU DON'T GET CAUGHT INCLUDING YOUR CHILD


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## GPR

First off: Don't cheat. 

Now, you definitely need to get your husband checked out. Like has been said, I don't know any man that doesn't want sex unless there is some type of problem. Whether it's ED, Low Testosterone.

If you wouldn't mind answering some very personal questions:

What is sex like when you do have it? Does he have issues with performance or have problems getting or staying erect?

You said overall he is healthy, but that doesn't mean anything. Is he tired a lot? Sleep a lot?


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## Anomnom

GPR said:


> First off: Don't cheat.
> 
> Now, you definitely need to get your husband checked out. Like has been said, I don't know any man that doesn't want sex unless there is some type of problem. Whether it's ED, Low Testosterone.
> 
> If you wouldn't mind answering some very personal questions:
> 
> What is sex like when you do have it? Does he have issues with performance or have problems getting or staying erect?
> 
> You said overall he is healthy, but that doesn't mean anything. Is he tired a lot? Sleep a lot?


No problem getting erect but sex only lasts 5-10 mins. I figured because it's so few and far between he comes so quickly. No more tired then the norm and sleeps normally.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Drover

Anomnom said:


> No problem getting erect but sex only lasts 5-10 mins. I figured because it's so few and far between he comes so quickly. No more tired then the norm and sleeps normally.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


That's why he doesn't like sex. He has performance anxiety. He's ashamed. Try viagra. Try one of the de-sensitizing creams. Talk to a doctor.


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## Sara8

anchorwatch said:


> Sara, how's this 'some form of intimacy' is that better?
> 
> Who said cheat?
> 
> And you just described me. I got help and 'We're Back'


I did not say you said to cheat. 

You said: "It is understood that a marriage can not last without intimacy. Don't lose your self respect and cheat. End it fairly. Cheating will end it badly."

That is the statement I am disputing. 

Yes. it's best to get help, but viagra does not work for everyone. 

I have numerous friends married to men in their 50s with erectile dysfunction, who do not cheat and it has never entered their minds. 

They have been married 20 or more years and they vowed to be faithful in sickness and in health. 

Their are other ways to satisfy sexual urges without going outside the marriage. 

In addition, I have a lot of brother one of whom is in his 50s with erectile dysfunction. 

His wife is crazy about him, and does not cheat.

So, I am glad you got help but I was only disputing your statement that a marriage can not survive without sex. 

Their are other forms of intimacy, BTW, in a marriage, too.


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## This is me

Anomnom said:


> I've also seen a counsellor privately (without hub knowing I went) who suggested he only thinks about sex for reproductive purposes which he seems to have 'learned' from his parents.
> 
> 
> 
> 1. Why are you hiding this from him? Be open about going to a IC and get him to MC if you can!
> 
> 2. I do not have much faith in a IC who gives conclusions without talking to the person they are giving their opinions about.
Click to expand...


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## GPR

Does he enjoy it when you do have sex? Do you guys do different things (foreplay, different positions, different places, etc?) or is it just straight missionary with little to nothing else? 

How do you initiate, and how does he normally respond when he tells you he doesn't want it? And has he gotten any deeper into it other than "he doesn't like it"? 

And can you give any further explanation to the thing with the parents and just for reproduction?


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## GPR

Sara8 said:


> I did not say you said to cheat.
> 
> You said: "It is understood that a marriage can not last without intimacy. Don't lose your self respect and cheat. End it fairly. Cheating will end it badly."
> 
> That is the statement I am disputing.
> 
> Yes. it's best to get help, but viagra does not work for everyone.
> 
> I have numerous friends married to men in their 50s with erectile dysfunction, who do not cheat and it has never entered their minds.
> 
> They have been married 20 or more years and they vowed to be faithful in sickness and in health.
> 
> Their are other ways to satisfy sexual urges without going outside the marriage.
> 
> In addition, I have a lot of brother one of whom is in his 50s with erectile dysfunction.
> 
> His wife is crazy about him, and does not cheat.
> 
> So, I am glad you got help but I was only disputing your statement that a marriage can not survive without sex.
> 
> Their are other forms of intimacy, BTW, in a marriage, too.



It WILL be a problem if one partner needs sex and the other will not reciprocate. True it helps if they work together, try alternatives, etc. But in this case, none of that is being done. It makes a HUGE different if both spouses care and can address the situation together. But if nothing like that is being done, and the attitude is "Hey, you married me, you are just going to have to deal with it". Then, there are going to be problems. 

Now I'm not saying it's OK to cheat, but a marriage like this is doomed if something doesn't change.


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## LovesHerMan

All marriages face challenges. What you are going to do to meet this challenge? Are you going to discuss your issues with him, or are you going to look for an empty thrill elsewhere? Dig deep down inside, and find the strong woman who can find solutions to the problems in her life. Even if you found another man, there would still be problems, just different ones.


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## anchorwatch

Sara8 said:


> Their are other forms of intimacy, BTW, in a marriage, too.


Good, we're in agreement. That's why I used the word intimacy, not sex.


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## GhostRydr

Unless he knows its over (and its only fair to tell him so) dont cheat

Also, educate yourself on his country's culture and norms and how closely he subscribes to them, ie...do you stand the chance of him kidnapping your baby and going back? Will he look at you wanting to leave him as a personal disgrace and try to physically harm, disfigure or even possibly kill you?


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## Goldmember357

another lost soul


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## Anomnom

GPR said:


> Does he enjoy it when you do have sex? Do you guys do different things (foreplay, different positions, different places, etc?) or is it just straight missionary with little to nothing else?
> 
> How do you initiate, and how does he normally respond when he tells you he doesn't want it? And has he gotten any deeper into it other than "he doesn't like it"?
> 
> And can you give any further explanation to the thing with the parents and just for reproduction?


He's quite indifferent. He says he enjoys it but if he did, he'd do it more often. Over the years we've tried different things but he is pretty much indifferent to everything sex related.. even bjs.

I initiate by either touching or making suggestions. 99% of the time he says he's not in the mood, we'll do it tomorrow (which never happens), he's tired or any number of other 'reasons' to not do it. It's very deflating dealing with this for so many years, it's a miracle I still have any self esteem left at all. 

He's only ever said that he didn't like it the one time which I think surprised even him when we discussed it. His family is from a small asian village of a generation that just married to have babies, they've never slept in the same bed and by all appearances only had sex for procreation.


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## Anomnom

GhostRydr said:


> Unless he knows its over (and its only fair to tell him so) dont cheat
> 
> Also, educate yourself on his country's culture and norms and how closely he subscribes to them, ie...do you stand the chance of him kidnapping your baby and going back? Will he look at you wanting to leave him as a personal disgrace and try to physically harm, disfigure or even possibly kill you?


I lived in his country (with his parents) for over 4 years so I speak the language and know the culture well. Prior to him I was with someone else from his country who loved sex so it is definitely not a specifically cultural issue. 

In some fights he's said that he would take our baby back to his country but he is not an independent person and could never do it on his own and even if he managed it, I know where all his family live so I'm not worried about them disappearing and I've never worried about my safety with him, he's a kind and placid man. 

Like I've said before we have a pretty good marriage, it's just this issue that is becoming more of a problem as the years go by. It feels crazy to me to leave someone because of just a sex issue but it's so important to me as part of a loving relationship. I am going to book us in to counselling, I think it's our only hope to make him realise how serious this is.


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## warlock07

What culture specifically if you don' mind? And who is this new guy you are talking to? Is he single?


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## Cosmos

I was in a similar situation many years ago. After exploring every avenue available to me, I decided to divorce my H, rather than cheat on him. 

Whilst I can understand you thinking the way you are doing, cheating really isn't the answer to this problem. You say you don't want to divorce him because he's a good father etc but, should you cheat, he might divorce you anyway...

Far better to be completely open with him by telling him that unless he's prepared to address the problem, you're going to have to walk away.

No marriage can survive without physical intimacy, OP, but cheating isn't the way to go.


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## sinnister

I really don't see it how you guys do.

I don't think she has cheated because it felt good to be hit on by a guy. WTF??? How is that an EA? She never said she enjoys long converstations and discuses their feelings. She said the guy has made his intentions known and it felt good.

I'll say this again, cheating is not the right answer here, but it's a basic human NEED to have sex. And if your spouse isn't giving it to you, they need to tell you why. They are the one breaching the marriage.

Other forms of intimacy only get you so far. At some point if you're not getting sex the basic human need kicks in and you will want it from somebody else. I also understand the not being able to leave thing due to small children. I will never leave my babies. Ever.

So you have two solid choices and 1 terrible one you can make. Leave your family or suffer through female form of permanent blue balls. The terrible choice is obviously cheating. Neither is appealing but unfortunately it is the position your husband has put you in.


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## Anomnom

Thanks for everyone's responses. I'm booked in to see a marriage counsellor on my own next week and if she's any good I will try to convince hubby to come with me next time. We've also booked him in with the doctor end of next week to get a health check and hormones checked. 

I think it's finally starting to sink in how serious I am about potentially leaving him if he doesn't make some sort of effort. I don't want to stray and I do take responsibility for my own actions so hopefully these first steps are in the right direction.


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## Anomnom

Worrying update -

I told my husband I was going to see a marriage counsellor on Monday and his immediate response was "Well if we seperate, I'll take B (baby's name) back to my country". I said I'm going to a counsellor, not a lawyer, I don't want a divorce I just need to talk to someone about our problems. 

This escalated into a big fight where I ended up saying that I would get custody anyway being the full time carer and he responded with "I'll kill you and B (baby) before that happens". This is the second time he has said this to me..the first about 6 months ago. I said, amongst other things, that if he ever says that to me again i'm going to the police, which I absolutely will.

He is by no means physically or verbally abusive, normally very placid temperament but this is just not normal right? No normal person would even have this thought cross their mind no matter how angry, right?


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## Phenix70

Anomnom said:


> Worrying update -
> 
> I told my husband I was going to see a marriage counsellor on Monday and his immediate response was "Well if we seperate, I'll take B (baby's name) back to my country". I said I'm going to a counsellor, not a lawyer, I don't want a divorce I just need to talk to someone about our problems.
> 
> This escalated into a big fight where I ended up saying that I would get custody anyway being the full time carer and he responded with *"I'll kill you and B (baby) before that happens". This is the second time he has said this to me..the first about 6 months ago.* I said, amongst other things, that if he ever says that to me again i'm going to the police, which I absolutely will.
> 
> He is by no means physically or verbally abusive, normally very placid temperament but this is just not normal right? No normal person would even have this thought cross their mind no matter how angry, right?


F**k that!
Get the hell out now, this man has already threatened to kill you & your child twice, what more do you need to know that he's obviously unstable.
Mentally healthy people do not threaten to kill their SO's & children.
Find a Women's Shelter, call the police & divorce this guy.
There is NO WAY in hell I would stay with a man who made a threat to kill me or my child.


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## anchorwatch

Phenix70 said:


> F**k that!
> Get the hell out now, this man has already threatened to kill you & your child twice, what more do you need to know that he's obviously unstable.
> Mentally healthy people do not threaten to kill their SO's & children.
> Find a Women's Shelter, call the police & divorce this guy.
> There is NO WAY in hell I would stay with a man who made a threat to kill me or my child.


:iagree::iagree::iagree:


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## Henri

Avoid emotional blackmail. Don't even rise to defend/challenge the "taking baby" idea. Return the topic to open topics, not defence or offence. 

Keep notes of these conversations, when and what exactly was said (keep an email diary for example which others don't have a clue about the password, this will help your case). Talk to real friends and family now, so they too can witness your conversations e.g. killing you. These are hasty words but you will save yourself pain in the future by simply taking steps now. Where I live they report murders on TV (they have a drive to reduce it), almost always neighbours say they didn't expect anything was wrong until the husband kills his wife (often they are mature couples too).


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## hunter411

Anom, 
I was reading your posts rather casually until your last one. I no longer need a cup of coffee. Please listen to me carefully. I know what I am talking about. You have to take these threats seriously. If you add in your opinion he is already having medical issues and other problems, he may be giving you his final solution to all of this. There is no one indicator that you can use to know if this is just a means of control, or if he is serious. One thing that almost always happens in this situation where a murder occurred... They told their victims they would do it. I dont know where you are located, there should be a lot of resources available at your disposal if you are in the U.S. Family Violence awareness has come a long way in the last 10 years. You have to take this threat as real. Are you willing to risk the life of your child? Yours? Friends or family that might be in the wrong place ant the wrong time? Put the life of your child and your life first. If you are in the States and need some direct instructions, PM me. I dont want to put out specific details on a public forum. It can educate a batterer.


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## RClawson

Do yourself a favor and go the the police now. That is a terrorist threat and something that is taken very seriously by law enforcement. You are far to cavalier about him making this statement but you are very close to becoming a statistic. 

Your husband has severe emotional issues and you need to take a strong stance for you and your child. Sex is a non issue at this point.


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## Anomnom

I have now told my sister what happened. I have never been remotely scared of him before as I am, I guess, the dominant one in our relationship, but as this is the second time he's said it I can not ignore it.

In saying that I think that if I go on as if everything is normal he would never act out or do anything..he is the calmest, non-confrontational person I know..but I think if I made real attempts at seperating is when something could potentially happen because he couldn't handle loosing face, returning to his country divorced without his child.. 

I will see what the counseller has to say tomorrow, I just don't know what to do. And yes, sex is the last thing on my mind now.


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## Niha123

Tell us what happened please. Have you heard from the counselor? Did he come to go with you and is he still threatening you?


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## fshyfrg

Wow, this was a bit of a terrifying read. If you go to 
Anomnom's page you'll see she is still active and presumably in a new relationship, but it's kind of eerie she never responded!

Anomnom, I hope that things were all right in the end.


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## weightlifter

?? Her page. She looks inactive since Feb.


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## tinarett

Tell him if things don't change you want a divorce. See what he says to that. It is hard but if he really wants to save the marriage he will get help. There's no guarantee it will work however. I am in a similar situation and I know it's very hard. Technically how can it be called cheating if he doesn't have sex with you? I know the temptation you are in. Tell him to get help see how he reacts. Tell him you will seek sex elsewhere again see how he reacts if nothing helps leave because you will go crazy otherwise. Sexless marriage is ok if both sides are happy with it. Having sex once to two times a week is standard if he can't do at least once a forthnight it will be very difficult for you. I realise there's baby involved. Hence give him a chance to work it out. But if he refuses than he doesn't care enough for the marriage. You need to talk and lay the cards on the table. I hope you can work it out. Good luck.


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