# Weak moments?



## Numb in Ohio (Oct 31, 2011)

While going through separation, how do you get past the weak moments? 

When you feel alone, undesirable, too depressed to go through a normal day without a breakdown...

Those moments when you almost feel that being miserable with him might be better than being miserable alone.


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## canguy66 (Dec 18, 2011)

Vulnerable moments? Yes. It's normal. They happen and they suck, but all we can do is do out best to shift our mindset, keep busy and take our pleasure where we can.


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## lamaga (May 8, 2012)

Oh, those moments are so awful -- I'm sorry.

You just have to soldier on through them. They will pass.

Friends help, support of any kind helps. Keep posting here!


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

Talk to a friend. If you have a friend of the opposite gender all the better, you can get a self-esteem builder. Friends know your good points, and don't mind giving you a bit of reinforcement. I also kill time, like go to yoga or to the movies, something that is committed at least an hour of doing something to break the broken record in your head.


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## UpnDown (May 4, 2012)

I vent on TAM lol, it's all over! Harass a few people in PMs and others I know personally, haha... It's so easy to get down on yourself.. especially when you see how "well" the other half is doing. She left "knowing" what she wanted and I was left wondering about everything and 100lbs heavier 7 years after we met (although I've managed to drop 35 of that).

Let yourself go through the motions, but do not use enablers like alcohol.. it serves no purpose when you are alone.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## justabovewater (Jun 26, 2011)

Just like everyone says, take it moment by moment. I STILL have those moments, heck the last two days have been bad. Had to visit my closet last night cause I didn't want the kids to know. Sad thing for me is that I've been separated almost a year and I'm still having bad days now and then. It's definitely gotten better, but sometimes the loneliness and despair are too much.

You'll get through it, just be sure to treat yourself with kindness. Cry when you have to.


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## AlterEgoist (Mar 6, 2012)

I know a lot of bad days come from sadness and loneliness, but keep in mind that some bad days come from anger too. Look at my story, lol. With anything, you just need to keep them in check. I'm doing a lot better than I was 3 weeks ago.


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## Mothra777 (Apr 10, 2012)

I think we all have weak moments. When I have mine I find distraction the best thing. I take a ride on my bike, watch a movie or just go for a walk. If I cannot do any of these things, I have found 'One Moment Meditation' to be helpful - it may not be for everyone, but try this: One-Moment Meditation: "How to Meditate in a Moment" - YouTube


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## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

I come here and vent to people who understand!


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## survivorwife (May 15, 2012)

Numb in Ohio said:


> While going through separation, how do you get past the weak moments?
> 
> When you feel alone, undesirable, too depressed to go through a normal day without a breakdown...
> 
> Those moments when you almost feel that being miserable with him might be better than being miserable alone.


It's perfectly acceptable to cry once in awhile. Alone. Having a "pity party", so to speak. Sometimes I do force myself to get through the day, but I do it. My boss expects it. My children expect it. And, when the day is done, I sleep well knowing I made it through the day.

And I can safely admit that I know that "being miserable with him" is far worse than being "miserable without him". I look around. My home is peaceful, happy, surrounded by "family memories" (kids, parents etc). Not him. He is not here. I am safe from being belittled, controlled, insulted, and dragged down by him. Never again. And THAT makes me happy!


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