# Husband won't send nudes



## UnicornCupcake (Dec 8, 2016)

I picked up a second job a few weeks ago. I told my husband that given the adjustment period (evenings and weekends are involved with my new schedule) I'd like us to make sure we prioritize sex. I just didn't want to to wake up in a month exhausted from work and realized we hadn't done it. Anyway, he was all for this. He seemed quite happy that I vocalized that I want more sex.

I've been asking him to send nudes. A **** pic. I've even asked him to take some of me. He WON'T. On one hand, I want to respect his wishes even though I don't understand them, but on the other I'm kind of annoyed. I told him I wanted to us to pay more attention to our sex lives and he's all for that - on his terms. If it's something he doesn't want to do suddenly it's off the table. 

I WANT to bring up the selfishness of his actions. It's just a few pictures. Maybe we can take a video. Nothing crazy. I just want to do SOMETHING different. But I'm not sure he even IS being selfish? He brought up blow jobs and wondered when he'd get one next and I told him after my **** pic. It's like the thought of doing that was out of the question.

Anyone have any insight on this?

He's not small or anything and he has a nice body so I don't think there SHOULD be anything going on down there to make him feel inferior or self conscious. 

I don't know why this is bothering me so much. Probably because I have very few sexual demands. Sex is sex. What I REALLY want a **** pic and he just won't do it.


----------



## xitinglife (Jun 25, 2017)

UnicornCupcake said:


> I picked up a second job a few weeks ago. I told my husband that given the adjustment period (evenings and weekends are involved with my new schedule) I'd like us to make sure we prioritize sex. I just didn't want to to wake up in a month exhausted from work and realized we hadn't done it. Anyway, he was all for this. He seemed quite happy that I vocalized that I want more sex.
> 
> I've been asking him to send nudes. A **** pic. I've even asked him to take some of me. He WON'T. On one hand, I want to respect his wishes even though I don't understand them, but on the other I'm kind of annoyed. I told him I wanted to us to pay more attention to our sex lives and he's all for that - on his terms. If it's something he doesn't want to do suddenly it's off the table.
> 
> ...


No offense, but my first reaction after (and actually in the process of) reading this post was ... well, a giggle. Then I realized that you're being serious. In this case, I have a few questions to ask:

(1) How old are you?
(2) For how long have you been married?

It sounds like you don't really have much experience. This is fine, we all go through this. What leads me to believe that you do not have much experience is that nowhere in your post have you indicated as to why your husband might not want that, which leads me to believe that you never asked him, or that the communication between the two of you is broken. It sounds like you haven't explained to him that it turns you on, or why it turns you on, or why you even want it. 

Let me put it in perspective: some time ago I wanted to take a few pictures of my wife. She was OK with that. Then I asked her to take pictures with me, or even record us. She was NOT ok with that. I didn't get angry. I apologized, and then spoke with her about her feelings, reservations, and fears. She gave me clear answers, and I haven't asked her again. Period. Done. 

You have to understand that he may have his reasons. Those reasons might even sound irrational to you, but they are his reasons. You have to respect that. I can't help it -- from your post, I gather that communication between the two of you is broken. 

What do you expect people to tell you on this forum? Do you expect them to tell you that all, or most guys have that issue, and give you a magic formula for resolving it? You need to talk to him, and you need to stop being so self-centered on this issue. Good luck!


----------



## UnicornCupcake (Dec 8, 2016)

xitinglife said:


> No offense, but my first reaction after (and actually in the process of) reading this post was ... well, a giggle. Then I realized that you're being serious. In this case, I have a few questions to ask:
> 
> (1) How old are you?
> (2) For how long have you been married?
> ...


In your defense, when I re-read it it sounded ridiculous. Almost troll-like, lol. I assure you it's actually bothering me. I just feel like I'm not asking for much! Send me a picture!

I have asked why and he hasn't really given an answer. So I just sort of assumed he was self-conscious. He has more self-esteem issues than he should, IMO. He has NOTHING to be self-conscious about and I've told him that. He just has NEVER been sexually adventurous. I can't even get him to give me a face or boob shot. I posted about that and realized maybe that IS asking for a lot, but a picture? Do I EVER get what I want, sexually?


----------



## UnicornCupcake (Dec 8, 2016)

What were your wife's answers? If you don't mind me asking?


----------



## chillymorn69 (Jun 27, 2016)

Lol 

Most people don't want their junk floating around where it might be a problem.

You could try to gently playfully by asking every once and awhile but if he don't want to you should respect his decission.


----------



## zookeeper (Oct 2, 2012)

If he has never been adventurous, why would you expect him to start now?


----------



## UnicornCupcake (Dec 8, 2016)

zookeeper said:


> If he has never been adventurous, why would you expect him to start now?


That's why I backed off on any other secret demands: I accepted he wasn't adventurous. But a PICTURE?
Can there not BE some compromise?


----------



## chillymorn69 (Jun 27, 2016)

UnicornCupcake said:


> That's why I backed off on any other secret demands: I accepted he wasn't adventurous. But a PICTURE?
> Can there not BE some compromise?



Porn?


----------



## UnicornCupcake (Dec 8, 2016)

chillymorn69 said:


> Porn?


I watch porn. He insists he doesn't. He'd probably be heartbroken if he found out I actually watch it... He's only 31, but I swear, he's like an old prudish man at times.


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

A lot of people would not agree to sending this sort of picture. Once sent, it's public domain. 

Are you ok with the potential of sexual pictures of you getting out on the internet?


----------



## UnicornCupcake (Dec 8, 2016)

EleGirl said:


> A lot of people would not agree to sending this sort of picture. Once sent, it's public domain.
> 
> Are you ok with the potential of sexual pictures of you getting out on the internet?


I'm OK with it. This is my husband. I trust him. If he betrays that by posting photos than all the more ammunition for me in the divorce.
It's not about the picture per se. I just want him to do something sexually for ME. It's always about him.


----------



## chillymorn69 (Jun 27, 2016)

UnicornCupcake said:


> I'm OK with it. This is my husband. I trust him. If he betrays that by posting photos than all the more ammunition for me in the divorce.
> It's not about the picture per se. I just want him to do something sexually for ME. It's always about him.


What you ask for pics so you can use it aginst him in divord. That might be why he hesitant.


----------



## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

UnicornCupcake said:


> I picked up a second job a few weeks ago. I told my husband that given the adjustment period (evenings and weekends are involved with my new schedule) I'd like us to make sure we prioritize sex. I just didn't want to to wake up in a month exhausted from work and realized we hadn't done it. Anyway, he was all for this. He seemed quite happy that I vocalized that I want more sex.
> 
> I've been asking him to send nudes. A **** pic. I've even asked him to take some of me. He WON'T. On one hand, I want to respect his wishes even though I don't understand them, but on the other I'm kind of annoyed. I told him I wanted to us to pay more attention to our sex lives and he's all for that - on his terms. If it's something he doesn't want to do suddenly it's off the table.
> 
> ...


Some people just think it's too risky, doesn't even have to do with you. Phones get hacked. Ask him to do something else that turns you on.


----------



## UnicornCupcake (Dec 8, 2016)

chillymorn69 said:


> What you ask for pics so you can use it aginst him in divord. That might be why he hesitant.


That's not why I'm asking. I just think it ridiculous that a poster would ask whether or not I fear him posting them online. Like. Uh. DUH. Of course I don't. This is my husband, lol. If he does that's him betraying my trust. I'd get over it.


----------



## UnicornCupcake (Dec 8, 2016)

sokillme said:


> Some people just think it's too risky, doesn't even have to do with you. Phones get hacked.


Could it be that simple? If he worked in a professional suit and tie kinda job, I'd understand his hesitation more, but he's a labourer. The men in that pool tend me be er... A little more crass. I know teachers and doctors who refrain from social media entirely because you never know if a student, patient, parent, etc. can come across your page, but in our case it just seems like something minor for me to ask from him. He'snot even OPEN to discussion about it. I guess that's what bothers me.


----------



## DustyDog (Jul 12, 2016)

It was pointed out to me recently that I've "been around the block" a few times. None of the women I've been with would have been interested in 'sending' nudes. In the early part of a relationship, a bit of fun taking what were then polaroid photos, then discarding them.

But once a photo is in digital form and "sent" anywhere, it can very easily become public.

And, as my women partners have said, they want sex to be intimate between us, not shared.


----------



## chillymorn69 (Jun 27, 2016)

Hes conseritive by nature sexually.

Your going to have to slowly get him to open up sexually if he opens up at all.


----------



## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

UnicornCupcake said:


> Could it be that simple? If he worked in a professional suit and tie kinda job, I'd understand his hesitation more, but he's a labourer. The men in that pool tend me be er... A little more crass. I know teachers and doctors who refrain from social media entirely because you never know if a student, patient, parent, etc. can come across your page, but in our case it just seems like something minor for me to ask from him. He'snot even OPEN to discussion about it. I guess that's what bothers me.


I am not on any social media, I like my privacy. If my wife asked for me to send that picture I would laugh and tell her she is crazy, all things in on the internets stay on the internets, hell one day 100 years from now there will be an archive where researchers go through all our texts. This will be for HISTORY just like they dig up old bones now. HELL NO, no **** pics. 

HOWEVER, if and when she is adventurous in other ways I am more then ready, some of it my doing. Maybe he is just too smart to put it out there where it will eventually turn up online.


----------



## DustyDog (Jul 12, 2016)

UnicornCupcake said:


> I'm OK with it. This is my husband. I trust him. If he betrays that by posting photos than all the more ammunition for me in the divorce.
> It's not about the picture per se. I just want him to do something sexually for ME. It's always about him.


It's not about trusting HIM. Most service providers, when you signed up with them, asked for your permission for them to read your texts, emails, etc - and use your contents if they so desired, as long as they kept your personal information private. Only your name and social security number are considered private. A photo of the two of you going at it is not considered private, since it does not personally identify you and ISPs have indeed sold such photos.

Figure if it's a good photo and you send it to someone - it will become public.


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

UnicornCupcake said:


> That's not why I'm asking. I just think it ridiculous that a poster would ask whether or not I fear him posting them online. Like. Uh. DUH. Of course I don't. This is my husband, lol. If he does that's him betraying my trust. I'd get over it.


Him posting pics of you online. You posting pics of him online.

But that's not the complete issue here. How secure do you think messaging is on cell phones?


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

DustyDog said:


> It's not about trusting HIM. Most service providers, when you signed up with them, asked for your permission for them to read your texts, emails, etc - and use your contents if they so desired, as long as they kept your personal information private. Only your name and social security number are considered private. A photo of the two of you going at it is not considered private, since it does not personally identify you and ISPs have indeed sold such photos.
> 
> Figure if it's a good photo and you send it to someone - it will become public.


Yep.......


----------



## Hope Shimmers (Jul 10, 2015)

I don't know. I would think partners would trust each other to keep such things private. I sent nudes to my ex-boyfriend... not that he gave a damn.

Why not just take a photo of him during a private time and keep it on your phone?


----------



## TheTruthHurts (Oct 1, 2015)

My w would never do this though she once let me take a couple of discrete photos. I want to sext a little but I understand and respect her boundaries (though it would be amazing if she relaxed them a bit). We're old though - i suspect if you're young you have time to work on opening him up. Don't ever give up. My w is amazing but way more closed than me - I'm still whittling away after 30+ years and she's moving slowly forward so keep trying (I didn't push for several years / a few decades because we were so busy with kids and career so don't assume I've been pushing a glacier ha ha)

I'm shocked no one offered to pinch hit. I guess not many laborers here 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## hope4family (Sep 5, 2012)

To be fair, I see where you are coming from. 

However, there are a ton of logical reasons as to why an individual would say no to this. It's up to you as a partner to calmly and lovingly figure out what the reasons are, ask if there is a compromise somewhere (hard copy's, professional photos, ect ) then back off. 

Now to be more then blunt, thank you for prioritizing a pleasing and amicable sex life. That being said, the cure to finding this out easier might be in giving him what he desires and how he desires it (wear him out sexually) and then talking about what turns you both on individually. This is not a home run conversation, but something that would probably be best done gradually as others suggest.


----------



## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

I've never sent my husband a nude pic. Not ever. 

I'm just not comfortable with the idea of naked pics of me being out there. Once you put something out in digital media it's there..... forever.

He's never asked for one but I'm sure I've mentioned how I feel about it. 

He sees me naked every evening and gets regular sex, so he'll have to live without it. 


I'd probably do a lot of adventurous things if he asked, but naked pics ain't happening.

Maybe your husband feels like me?


----------



## TX-SC (Aug 25, 2015)

I wouldn't either.


----------



## TheTruthHurts (Oct 1, 2015)

To be clear I'd be googling how to capture the most flattering dicpic immediately if my w even remotely implied she was interested.

I made a clone-a-Willy of my d as a laugh for my w. Might be a good option for you. It's very rigid and not a particularly good vibrator (when so many wonderful options are available  ) but carrying that around in your purse might get you a little randy. Very realistic - veins and all - just super rigid. 

So, watch videos and read blogs if you try this. Many fail because you get soft stressing about mixing the formula and sticking you d into a tube of gunk with a few minute window.

So, instead, you get a cheap pump and c ring, and another Tam member recommended pvc pipe to replace the flexible tubing provided. Lube, stroke, mix, time, and lean into the pvc so any fat pad is pressed flat and you have a nice long impression.

Sorry to be so graphic but that might be your solution. If you do it with him the stress will be lowered as you can attend to the mixing. Plus I read that a d that is raised via a bj is bigger (yeah on another TAM d thread)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## harrybrown (May 22, 2013)

if you figure this out, let me know.

I was trying to flirt with my wife on my phone by texting.


She got upset with me, just sending fake lips showing a kiss.

She said that was wrong for me to do this. (been married for over 40 years)

So I would not now ask her to send a picture, because she was so upset by using some of the lips etc that come with the phone.

Maybe if you go first and say you really want this, so you will give him a bj or something, if he will do this deed.

any suggestions for better ways to try to spice things up with the wife, let me know. we are way behind you two.

Good luck.


----------



## Rubix Cubed (Feb 21, 2016)

UnicornCupcake said:


> That's not why I'm asking. I just think it ridiculous that a poster would ask whether or not I fear him posting them online. Like. Uh. DUH. Of course I don't. This is my husband, lol. If he does that's him betraying my trust. I'd get over it.


 Doesn't have to be him. What if he loses his phone?


----------



## leon2100 (May 13, 2015)

Send them to me!


----------



## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

Three words: hidden spy cam. 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## toblerone (Oct 18, 2016)

yo i may have read through all this crap way too fast but I don't see anything mentioning whether or not you sent him anything.


----------



## introvert (May 30, 2016)

chillymorn69 said:


> Hes conseritive by nature sexually.
> 
> Your going to have to slowly get him to open up sexually if he opens up at all.


I dom my gf until the cows come home....I'm not closed off at all, sexually...but there's no way in hell a photo of my naked body is going out onto the interwebz. I concur with the OP's husband.


----------



## alexm (Nov 29, 2008)

UnicornCupcake said:


> I can't even get him to give me a face or boob shot. I posted about that and realized maybe that IS asking for a lot, but a picture? Do I EVER get what I want, sexually?


Frankly, it's a little different, but he's also entitled to draw his own lines.

I mean, in all honesty, a woman who wants her husband to send her pictures, never mind asks him to shoot on her face or boobs? Where do I sign up?

But, he's allowed to not want to do those things. He has his reasons, and whatever they are, it's okay for him to have them.

The problem that I see, obviously, is that there's a divide between what you want and what he's willing to give you, and he doesn't seem willing to compromise, or even try. That's going to be a problem, if it isn't already.


----------



## MrsAldi (Apr 15, 2016)

I don't think the nudes pictures are the issue, perhaps demanding them is. 
If my husband demanded that I send him them, I would not be happy. 

Maybe he's not comfortable with the idea of you being the "masculine" one in the marriage. Maybe he wants something from you that is "feminine". 
Look he may like that you're a strong woman, but when you become the "man" in all aspects of the marriage, especially in bedroom, don't be surprised when you see a straight man lose his sex drive. 

He likes you being in control of other things, but not all the time in the bedroom. Have you ever looked at the costumes on an adult website? Most of the female ones are Nurse, French Maid and Secretary. The reason why they are popular still is because men, like to enjoy the aspects of a submissive women who will take care of them, be nice and stroke their ego! So if you want your husband to send you a picture of his thing, then give him something that will get his blood flowing! 


Sent from my B1-730HD using Tapatalk


----------



## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

If my husband suddenly asked me to send him nude pics I'd be wondering wtf he'd been doing to give him that idea. I also wouldn't do it, because him sharing them across the internet isn't the only way someone else could get their hands on them. He could lose his phone and that would be it.


----------



## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

I'd have no problem doing this - but then my feeling is that if there is someone out there who *really* wants to see my naked body, then they can feel free to knock themselves out. 

I'd love to hear that my wife was actually excited by my body and wanted pictures.

That said, I do understand people being generally shy about having pictures taken and there is a legitimate worry about pictures escaping into the wild.


I'm generally a fan of people in relationships doing their best to satisfy their partners desires / kinks, but of course everyone has a right to decide that certain things are off limits.


----------



## Middle of Everything (Feb 19, 2012)

Just a **** pic? I'd have no problem doing it. I mean who is going to identify me solely from a pic of my ****? Add in face or something for either my wife or I? No. Then the internet and forever comes into play for me. But just sexy pics or our naughty parts? I'd find it kinda sexy. Be exciting for me if my wife requested it.

But as others have said its about what your husband is comfortable with OP. What is simple, no problem and even appealing to one person could be a complete no go for another. Ill give you an example. My wife really wants me to do a strip tease for her. I've yet to do it. It makes me nervous just thinking about doing it for her. Its simple and fun. But im not in shape like Spartan from 300. I have no "dancing" experience. I'm afraid something that is supposed to be exciting and a turn on is silly and a laugh to her instead.

Simple and no problem for some. Not so for all. To be fair I am trying to work up the courage to strip tease for my wife. Maybe talk with your husband and find out WHY he is hesitant. Maybe its something he can work up to as well.


----------



## Tigger (Dec 5, 2007)

It's his body and I think you should respect that.


----------



## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

I'm pretty adventurous, but almost certainly wouldn't send my wife penis portraits either. And she wouldn't send me vagina videos. We have some of us on our computer, but none on the phone, and will keep it that way. Just cautious, I guess.


----------



## Mr. Nail (Apr 26, 2011)

TheTruthHurts said:


> I'm shocked no one offered to pinch hit. I guess not many laborers here


It was bound to come up in a thread like this. Reminds me a bit of the days when my credit was awful and every store I went to wanted me to fill out a credit app. I used to tell the cashiers that I would except the hysterical laughter from the credit office was too embarrassing. . . . . . Something similar applies here.

Onward. @UnicornCupcake has been very clear that She is getting fed up with the NO's. I believe she said something like "can't I have just one sexual thing for me.?" She really NEEDS for him to get out of his comfort zone just for her. I totally understand this need. There have been some very long times when Mrs Nail wouldn't leave her comfort for me. It's not so much the picture, it's the proof that you are important enough to get something like that.


----------



## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

You don't sound as if you respect your H imo. I am sure this is only one incident and it happens across other spheres of your relationship? 
There is a huge difference between an assertive wife and an aggressive one. Men do not like aggressive women. Think about it, he said no, so why go on about it, it is his choice, right?

To my mind your H does not like it and this is one area where he has control. Respect that.


----------



## alexm (Nov 29, 2008)

MrsAldi said:


> Maybe he's not comfortable with the idea of you being the "masculine" one in the marriage. Maybe he wants something from you that is "feminine".
> Look he may like that you're a strong woman, but when you become the "man" in all aspects of the marriage, especially in bedroom, don't be surprised when you see a straight man lose his sex drive.
> 
> He likes you being in control of other things, but not all the time in the bedroom. Have you ever looked at the costumes on an adult website? Most of the female ones are Nurse, French Maid and Secretary. The reason why they are popular still is because men, like to enjoy the aspects of a submissive women who will take care of them, be nice and stroke their ego! So if you want your husband to send you a picture of his thing, then give him something that will get his blood flowing!
> ...



Yeah, it can be kind of off-putting to have your spouse want something you don't _want_ them to want (that's a mouthful, but hopefully it makes sense)

OP said she'd want her hubby to finish on her face or chest, for example. While many men would be thrilled at that, some can't see past the fact that this is their wife and perhaps mother of their children, know what I mean? Perhaps he feels it's a degrading act for _her_ to do - despite the fact that she's actually asking for it (thereby removing the degrading aspect of it, IMO).

What's the saying? Madonna/***** something-or-other? That.


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

I think that the bottom line is that he does not feel comfortable sending photos of his junk. That's something that is deeply personal and should be respected.


----------



## TheTruthHurts (Oct 1, 2015)

EleGirl said:


> I think that the bottom line is that he does not feel comfortable sending photos of his junk. That's something that is deeply personal and should be respected.




To me it's the same as a guy wanting a sexual act like anal or public sex, but their SO says no way. Could just be a sexual mismatch. If it's not resolved and it's important enough, it can create a huge wedge in the relationship

I suspect these things become an issue, not because the spouse won't do the act, but that they refuse to acknowledge a mismatch is values and attitudes. Those are probably the underlying issues - in this case, very conservative (him) versus liberal or free spirited (as they used to call people without sexual "hangups"). That can be a real issue in many aspects of the relationship and perhaps this is just the straw that broke the camel's back

OP is this the underlying issue? Do you feel you are being held back in many areas of life by your H's conservative or rigid (from your perspective) viewpoint?

If so, I think you need to talk openly about that, and possibly get MC to help you both be heard and also hear each other with respect (not necessarily acceptance though)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## AussieRN (Mar 28, 2013)

As long as there no face or identifying anything in the picture I cant see why he would or should care. I for one would think it was awesome if my other half wanted to trade some pics and video.
If you want to try to get him to be more adventurous with sex perhaps try leading by example.....


----------



## Talker67 (Apr 7, 2016)

each person has their own limits to what they are willing to do online. Nudes for some are a big line in the sand. If he is not comfortable with sending you nude pics of him, then respect that. Also, you might get caught looking at these nudes at work and get fired anyway, so why roll those dice. 

USUALLY it is the other way around, it is the guy begging for nudes of the wife, and she refuses...possibly because she does not want them showing up posted online somewhere....


----------



## xitinglife (Jun 25, 2017)

UnicornCupcake said:


> In your defense, when I re-read it it sounded ridiculous. Almost troll-like, lol. I assure you it's actually bothering me. I just feel like I'm not asking for much! Send me a picture!
> 
> I have asked why and he hasn't really given an answer. So I just sort of assumed he was self-conscious. He has more self-esteem issues than he should, IMO. He has NOTHING to be self-conscious about and I've told him that. He just has NEVER been sexually adventurous. I can't even get him to give me a face or boob shot. I posted about that and realized maybe that IS asking for a lot, but a picture? Do I EVER get what I want, sexually?


Well, as with many women, to my wife sex and emotion are connected. Long story short, she said it would make her feel "cheap" and completely disconnected from me intimately. It would make sex appear mechanical and unrelated to our bond. At the time it sounded ridiculous to me, but I respected that. Upon further reflection, I can see her point. At any rate, I didn't question it. To me that (the making of our own porn, so to speak) would not constitute something overly important -- just fun; to her, on the other hand, it was obviously a matter of deep concern.


----------



## Jason Bourne (Jul 30, 2017)

Tbh i thought my wife was narrow minded in many sexual aspects but in this she did great. 
If security and safety bothers him try this:
Blutooth exchange while in separate bedrooms.
Make it a virtual sex chat but safe. And yes NEVER use Spybook, twitter, viber etc or anything else unless encrypted. GOOGLE NEVER FORGETS/FORGIVES.


----------



## She'sStillGotIt (Jul 30, 2016)

UnicornCupcake said:


> I just want him to do something sexually for ME. It's always about him.


Yeah, I'd figured that out already when you posted about him whining about when he'd get his next blow job. He sounds like an ignorant teenage kid whose still all about his own genitals and knows nothing about women or how to please them.

Lucky, lucky you. :frown2:


----------



## She'sStillGotIt (Jul 30, 2016)

A couple of months ago, I was minding my own business up in my woman cave when I received a text.

My husband had texted me a nude picture from the waist down after he'd just finishing his monthly 'manscaping.'

I replied back, "who is this?"


----------



## brooklynAnn (Jun 29, 2015)

She'sStillGotIt said:


> A couple of months ago, I was minding my own business up in my woman cave when I received a text.
> 
> My husband had texted me a nude picture from the waist down after he'd just finishing his monthly 'manscaping.'
> 8
> I replied back, "who is this?"


What was the answer? ?


----------



## Volunteer86 (Aug 2, 2017)

UnicornCupcake said:


> I watch porn. He insists he doesn't. He'd probably be heartbroken if he found out I actually watch it... He's only 31, but I swear, he's like an old prudish man at times.


So he doesnt know you watch it?


----------



## Volunteer86 (Aug 2, 2017)

I may have also missed the post but Unicorn do you send him any? My wife send me some and I have sent her a couple I was a little hesitant about it at first but after that it was no problem. I know my wife befriended another female on another site and she said they were going to trade her H for mine she asked me for permission and I told her I didn't mind my face wasn't included so it didn't matter. A little adventurous, of course when she sent hers my wife says. WOW! lol It was fun!


----------



## rm3507 (Dec 23, 2016)

UnicornCupcake said:


> I picked up a second job a few weeks ago. I told my husband that given the adjustment period (evenings and weekends are involved with my new schedule) I'd like us to make sure we prioritize sex. I just didn't want to to wake up in a month exhausted from work and realized we hadn't done it. Anyway, he was all for this. He seemed quite happy that I vocalized that I want more sex.
> 
> I've been asking him to send nudes. A **** pic. I've even asked him to take some of me. He WON'T. On one hand, I want to respect his wishes even though I don't understand them, but on the other I'm kind of annoyed. I told him I wanted to us to pay more attention to our sex lives and he's all for that - on his terms. If it's something he doesn't want to do suddenly it's off the table.
> 
> ...


I wish my W would show some type if interest. I would gladly send pics or videos. But here we are going on 11 months with no intimacy or sexual relations of any kind other than self gratification.  

Sent from my SM-G935P using Tapatalk


----------



## WorkingWife (May 15, 2015)

UnicornCupcake said:


> In your defense, when I re-read it it sounded ridiculous. Almost troll-like, lol. I assure you it's actually bothering me. I just feel like I'm not asking for much! Send me a picture!
> 
> I have asked why and he hasn't really given an answer. So I just sort of assumed he was self-conscious. He has more self-esteem issues than he should, IMO. He has NOTHING to be self-conscious about and I've told him that. He just has NEVER been sexually adventurous. I can't even get him to give me a face or boob shot. I posted about that and realized maybe that IS asking for a lot, but a picture? Do I EVER get what I want, sexually?


So when you asked why not, what DID he say?

Could it be he is afraid of the pictures getting out there and seen by others? Or maybe he's modest on your behalf? You hear all the time about people's online photo back ups getting hacked. I know he's not a movie start so probably low risk of that but he may be very uncomfortable with the idea of digital images.

You could encourage him to take some that don't show his face... Or send him some of you and see if that doesn't pique his interest.


----------



## frusdil (Sep 5, 2013)

I would never, ever send nude anyone nude pics. No way. The risk of them getting out there is far too high.


----------



## Vince Vance (Aug 7, 2017)

Since when is it okay to pressure your partner into doing something that they are clearly "not okay" doing??


----------



## ZedZ (Feb 6, 2017)

The way things are these days no way I sending **** pictures. Everything today can be traced...that's a fact...


----------



## spawn2031 (Jul 19, 2017)

1st off, I have to say that given other other forum posts from @UnicornCupcake there's a good amount of sexual mismatching going on here. Her guys sounds just plain vanilla while she is obviously Twist with sprinkles. I mean seriously... watches porn, wants a load blown on her chest and face, wants to exchange nudes... you've either got a super fun wild side to you or you've been so suppressed and unhappy with what you have that you are acting out in a big way with these desires. Or, you could be like me and just looking for ways to keep it interesting. I guess that depends on how long you've actually felt that way.

Problem with Plain Vanilla folks is that asking them to so anything even slightly risque can feel like the worst possible stage fright and completely paralyzing so plenty of folks stay away from it entirely. He might be very bad at communicating as well (which seems he is) and instead of talking to you about it just gives you very unsatisfying answers to just get out of the conversation. Who knows, only he can tell you that.

Personally, I have no problem with sending a **** pic to my wife, I honestly don't know what the turn on is for her as I have heard her say on many occasion that "male strippers are hilarious to her and what makes you think I want to see that thing" so I assumed just seeing a **** wasn't anything special to her... I was wrong, lol. I was uncomfortable with doing it but that was more from a "Am I doing it right?" stand point.

Now... security... for those of you that are hyper concerned about this, there are a TON of ways to get around it. 

1) phone hacking... are you a celebrity? No? Then dont worry about it. Phone hacking isn't all that hard but it still does take some time and a hacker has to have a reason to target you first.
2) Snapchat... use it. Snapchat is a great way to not have questionable pics stored on either phone but still surprise your SO. Yes of course, even these can be recovered but you have to be able to root a phone and then run file recovery tools on it and retrieve them. While doable, still something someone has to have a reason and want to do. It's something someone wouldn't do just for the hell of it. Also if those sexy pics come to you and you DO want to keep them, you can screen shot them and save them. Dont want those being seen either? Read on....
3) Private Mode... Most phones have a private mode features now a days that you can enable. This creates a special private folder that can only be seen once a p/w is put in. The folder doesn;t even show up unless you put in the p/w so unless you knew there was a private folder on the phone (or suspected) there is no breadcrumb trail to follow. Perfect for those of you that are worried about losing your phone because it comes with a cool little extra feature.. you can have it turn off private mode once your phone's screen turns off!
4) Worrying about an ISP sharing your information? Look, there's a lot more juicy information that goes back and forth with your ISP about you that's a helluvalot more sensitive that you should be worried about. If you spent more than a couple of seconds time worrying about whether or not some no name hacker is gonna find your **** pic / nudes and share it with the world, well I'd say you're thinking too hard and should probably spend a little more time on productive and less paranoid things.... Like how to take the perfect **** pic (I'm still lookin into it! lol) Unless you have the most gorgeous body in the world, I doubt anyone besides your SO is really gonna look at it anyway.


----------



## TheTruthHurts (Oct 1, 2015)

Vince Vance said:


> Since when is it okay to pressure your partner into doing something that they are clearly "not okay" doing??




Since forever. 

Do you think I ever wanted to change a diaper? Do you think I ever wanted to go to a play?

My w picks clothes for me. Of course I pick them for her. I wear the ones she picks, and she sometimes wears the ones I pick.

Pushing for sexual issues is perfectly fine and desirable in a LTR. It's good to challenge perceptions and stated beliefs to see where differences lie and see where you can both grow.

Sex should be limited to your SO IMO, so it's the one thing in life you shouldn't get satisfied by others. That means you may have to push and prod to move your SO along as you change and grow in life (and vice versa).

One of the TAM ladies once mentioned that creating NEW experiences in a LTR is one of the real challenges, but it's the new experiences when we date that attracts us. So it is healthy IMO to continually look for new ways to connect, play, grow, etc. BTW this doesn't assume all new experiences end up good but live and learn and grow.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------

