# working on this



## Waited4This (Apr 10, 2011)

me and my wife have had some discussions about our sex life and I tell her my problems and she agree's and tells me she will work on the problems, it's going on a year with no change what so ever, how long should I wait? What should I do? It's getting to the point where I don't want to go home.
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## Enchantment (May 11, 2011)

Sorry, I don't know what your history is.

How old are you two? How long married? Kids? Does she work/have a lot of stress?

Does your wife say what her reasons are for why she is not interested and seems to be unwilling to try?

What is your relationship like outside of this issue?

Best wishes.


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## JennaLynne (Sep 13, 2011)

W4T - I agree can you give some background?


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## Waited4This (Apr 10, 2011)

Enchantment said:


> Sorry, I don't know what your history is.
> 
> How old are you two? How long married? Kids? Does she work/have a lot of stress?
> 
> ...


I'm 28 her 26. Married 8yrs as of this week. No kids, been tring since we got married no luck just alot of money paided to doctors to tell us that we are both good. She doesn't work, stress may stem from no kids. She really cant tell me her reasons just that she knows the problems are there. Relationship outside the problem is good people tell us we make them sick how much in love we are.
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## JennaLynne (Sep 13, 2011)

This sounds simliar to PART of my story. Has she seen a therapist about her lack of sex drive? What does she have to say about it? 

I can only speak from my situation - which was I just lost interest - it's not that it wasn't good - it's that it wasn't a need for me....first I thought it was side effects of meds I was on....then I thought it was because my H didn't put enough effort into me.......I then realized it was me - I lost interest in ME -- I needed to take steps to be able to feel pretty and attractive again, but that was on ME.


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## Trying2figureitout (Feb 3, 2011)

It's likely you.. at her age she shouldn't have any problem with her sex drive.

You don't stimulate her enough.... plus she knows you aren't going anywhere.

Act now or trust me it'll get worse!

First find out about women's needs (sex is low in the list) and try to fulfill those needs. It all starts in their brain.

You need to become a better you if you want your sex life to improve. Perhaps she isn't for you.


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## desert-rose (Aug 16, 2011)

Try marriage counseling?

Maybe it has something to do with the fact that you guys have been trying unsuccessfully to have kids for a while?

Have you tried talking to her about why she's not willing to work on this problem with you? I don't mean like a results-oriented talk, but like a getting-to-the-heart-of-the-problem kind of talk?


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