# Can men be scared by the strength of their feelings??



## LivingAndLearning (Jun 17, 2014)

Lets say you meet a new lady and are surprise how strongly you feel for them. Would this scare you to the point to pulling back or perhaps cutting off contact completely?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

Yes.

The problem is that it can be like a black hole. If you are too close it takes more and more effort to break loose.

That said, more common is to fall into an EA and have very clouded judgement. BUT it is more likely one has learned the hard way to realize the true danger. Even then ....

Most people prefer to play just the tip.


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## ocotillo (Oct 17, 2011)

LivingAndLearning said:


> Lets say you meet a new lady and are surprise how strongly you feel for them. Would this scare you to the point to pulling back or perhaps cutting off contact completely?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


--Depends on what you mean by, "New Lady" 

If it means somebody for whom those feelings would be inappropriate, (i.e. One or the other, or both of you are attached to somebody else.) I'd say, "Yes." Cutting off all contact immediately is the best thing to do. 

If it means somebody, "New" only in the sense of an otherwise unattached man having recently met a similarly unattached lady, I'd say the answer is, "No." It's a great feeling.


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

ocotillo said:


> --Depends on what you mean by, "New Lady"
> 
> If it means somebody for whom those feelings would be inappropriate, (i.e. One or the other, or both of you are attached to somebody else.) I'd say, "Yes." Cutting off all contact immediately is the best thing to do.
> 
> If it means somebody, "New" only in the sense of an otherwise unattached man having recently met a similarly unattached lady, I'd say the answer is, "No." It's a great feeling.


Nice catch. I read the post in a completely different context.

And I agree with you.


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## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

LivingAndLearning said:


> Lets say you meet a new lady and are surprise how strongly you feel for them. Would this scare you to the point to pulling back or perhaps cutting off contact completely?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Absolutely. And if I get any sense that I am falling for someone who isn't sure about me or not feeling the same about me I'm gonna break that off immediately. I don't ever want to be in a one sided love again......ever


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## LivingAndLearning (Jun 17, 2014)

Thanks for the replies guys. My question is in the context of being free and single. You happen to meet someone, chance meeting, have a great time and are kind of shocked by how strong the atraction is.


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## long_done (Jun 5, 2014)

Well you should thank your lucky stars in this case. What, you'd rather meet someone whom you really don't have any interest in?

You should be careful not to scare her off with your infatuation. And make sure that over time she feels the same way about you. If it's just one-sided feeling you are going to be in a lot of hurt. So fake that you're not so interested until you know that she is interested.


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## ScarletBegonias (Jun 26, 2012)

Ladies can go through this too.It sucks as a free and single person but it REALLY sucks as a married person. 

Free and single=let it ride and try not to scare yourself into ruining something great.

Married= shut it down immediately and talk to your spouse about things so the two of you can figure out how it happened and how to fix it.


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## LivingAndLearning (Jun 17, 2014)

Thanks for your responses. I'm actually the female in this situation and met someone very unexpectedly. Even I was shocked but the strength of attraction (although I didn't let him know that) and I believe he was too.

That said, he pretty much bolted for the hills! 

Could very well be another reason why he did that but I was just curious.


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## sandc (Dec 15, 2011)

LivingAndLearning said:


> Thanks for your responses. I'm actually the female in this situation and met someone very unexpectedly. Even I was shocked but the strength of attraction (although I didn't let him know that) and I believe he was too.
> 
> That said, he pretty much bolted for the hills!
> 
> Could very well be another reason why he did that but I was just curious.


Then he's an idiot. Good riddance and I hope you get to experience that attraction again... this time with a man who can deal with his feelings.


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## ScarletBegonias (Jun 26, 2012)

LivingAndLearning said:


> Thanks for your responses. I'm actually the female in this situation and met someone very unexpectedly. Even I was shocked but the strength of attraction (although I didn't let him know that) and I believe he was too.
> 
> That said, he pretty much bolted for the hills!
> 
> Could very well be another reason why he did that but I was just curious.


If he bolted and stays gone then he wasn't feeling it as deeply as you are. Have you asked him why he disappeared on you?


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## LivingAndLearning (Jun 17, 2014)

sandc - here's hoping!

SB, you may well be correct and he just wasn't as interested as I was. In which case, fair enough  I haven't asked him. Had just figured it leave him be and he'll be in contact if he wants to. The main reason I asked is that I was in a relationship for a long time then single and not looking for a while after that ended. In short, it's been a very long time since I dated anyone and sort of just finding my feet anf figuring it all out again.


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