# Stuck



## MLady103 (Aug 18, 2015)

I'll get right to it. I've been married for 2 years. Sex is good but I want more! I don't want to just make love all the time I want to be (excuse my language) ****ed. I want to experience new things but husband has no interest or at least doesn't . I show it. I don't know where to go from here. I'm craving more sexually and I'm not getting it. It's driving me crazy


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## where_are_we (May 24, 2013)

MLady103 said:


> I'll get right to it. I've been married for 2 years. Sex is good but I want more! I don't want to just make love all the time I want to be (excuse my language) ****ed. I want to experience new things but husband has no interest or at least doesn't . I show it. I don't know where to go from here. I'm craving more sexually and I'm not getting it. It's driving me crazy


Welcome. I have been there. The one thing I have learned is you can't change another person. They must be willing to compromise and try to meet your needs, and you meet theirs in turn.

Have a frank, but loving discussion with him, outside of the bedroom, if you haven't already. If he's not willing to budge, or tries but is not into it, I think you are stuck with this mismatch in style. Then you will need to decide if this is a deal breaker for your marriage. 

Has he always been this way or was there a sudden change in his style? If he has always been this way, trying to change him now may not be possible if he is not willing to explore new things. Talk, talk, and talk some more.

My main advice is to not try to change him if he is not willing to explore new things because you could fail miserably like I did.

Good luck!


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

It is difficult to get a person with lower desire to improve their libido to the point that they will ravage you. Do not expect much. You have to try to get them to THINK about sex more often in a way that gets their attention. Regardless as to if you have a vibrator or not in the house, brag to you husband about your ability to go crazy with a toy you have in the house but offer little or NO details. When he asks wanting to know more, this is when you all the sudden pretend to be very shy!

The point of that is that it at least gets him THINKING about sex.

Cheers, 
Badsanta


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## MrVanilla (Apr 24, 2012)

MLady103 said:


> I'll get right to it. I've been married for 2 years. Sex is good but I want more! I don't want to just make love all the time I want to be (excuse my language) ****ed. I want to experience new things but husband has no interest or at least doesn't . I show it. I don't know where to go from here. I'm craving more sexually and I'm not getting it. It's driving me crazy



I agree with *where_are_we* that the two of you need to talk. This is a conversation many couples fail to have before marriage and it can cause a lot of issues later on. I feel a need to caution you as to how to approach this discussion. Express to him how you'd like to do new things - but *always* express this in a manner that suggests that you have never done any of these things before. 

My initial reaction to your craving to be ****ed, was that this is something that you have done before (why you miss it) and it's just not be a great idea to share those personal stories with hubby. It may be way easier on his ego if you put whatever thing it is that you want to do in the context of having never done it before and that it's your hope to share these acts together for the first time. 

Some men (not all) believe that they're the ones that are supposed to know more about sex than their spouses, so if you come across as having far more experience and knowledge in the area, it could wound the very maleness you're seeking. Have the conversation, but it should always be a new journey together, and not some competition with the past.


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## JohnA (Jun 24, 2015)

I read an interesting short story about a marriage where the women had a "hot steamy" affair. He ask her why she never even hinted at wanting to do something like that. Her response "but your are my husband and he was...". A lot of men do not push because he are taught to be the nice guy. 

Your problem is you are timid to push because he might see you as a **** who fing other men as well. There is another new thread here where she is way more experienced and her husband is losing it. I have always advised women to find a nice guy and bring the bad boy out regularly and they will live happily ever after. 

Hey president Reagan said it took him and his wife close to twenty yrs to be truly be comfortable with their sexuality and to open up completely. He was talking about what you are, and he and wife where out of Hollywood.


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## anonmd (Oct 23, 2014)

Buy him a copy of the book Just F*ck me by Eve Kingsley


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## JohnA (Jun 24, 2015)

Found thread from 2913 that s dead on. Perhaps a mod can link your's 

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/genera...on/56204-being-good-girl-wife-compliment.html

I never pushed my wife because I thought nice guys didnt do that if they loved you. WOMAN !!!! Please just make up your minds !


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## Young at Heart (Jan 6, 2015)

MLady103 said:


> I'll get right to it. I've been married for 2 years. Sex is good but I want more! I don't want to just make love all the time I want to be (excuse my language) ****ed. I want to experience new things but husband has no interest or at least doesn't . I show it. I don't know where to go from here. I'm craving more sexually and I'm not getting it. It's driving me crazy


You have gotten a lot of good advice. May I suggest a different approach. If you were I guy, I would tell you to get Glover's book NMMNG. Instead, I am going to tell you what you might want to learn from that by analogy. 

Take responsibility for your own sexuality and happiness, don't expect your spouse to be the source of your happiness. Work on improving yourself, so that you become absolutely fascinating to your spouse. Do new things that make you feel good about yourself and that cause your spouse to look at you in a new light and question their assumptions about you and how to react to you.

For example. Have you ever thought of say taking a pole dancing class, a belly dancing class, a class in how to strip for your husband, or a course in how to give a massage? Think about what your husband would think, if he heard you had signed up for one of these and that you came home and asked if you could practice your homework assignment on him. While he might at first decline because he wouldn't know how to act, he might also give in just to find out more about what you were doing that was putting a smile on your face when he saw you at night after your class. 

My suggestion is to find something you would find interesting, that will stretch you, that your H might find sexy and then go do it and take pride in your new skill. Most men find women to be the most sexy, when they are proud of themselves and their skills, confident, and happy. 

Good Luck to you.


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## Fozzy (Jul 20, 2013)

anonmd said:


> Buy him a copy of the book Just F*ck me by Eve Kingsley


I second this. Good book.


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