# Situation with spouse



## Samape1 (Mar 5, 2018)

I’ve been married 9 years. Our marriage just seems to keep getting crazier. We have one child. I try everyday to be positive with my husband but he doesn’t like anything I do. I’m always doing something incorrectly. I never seem to be able to do anything right. He gets frustrated if I even ask him a question or talk to him. He goes off and does his own thing the majority of the time- get mad if I call him. He says there isn’t anyone else, and for some reason I believe that. I try to spend family time with him, but he gets mad within minutes and makes it not worth it. He blames me for everything. He’s rude to my family, won’t let my parent over. He blames me for not spending quality time with our daughter- says I won’t let him. He took his checks out of the bank and is spending through all of our savings. Says he’s always leaving and then says he isn’t. I don’t want him to because I don’t feel comfortable having our daughter alone with him. Im stressed and don’t know what else to do. I do have a job, but don’t really make a lot. He says he refuses to let my daughter and I leave the state we live so I can get a better position. My parents won’t let my daughter and I live with them- they say they don’t have the room and we don’t have any other options in that area. Please assist.


----------



## Mr.Married (Feb 21, 2018)

Check his phone records...I think your going to be surprised.


----------



## brooklynAnn (Jun 29, 2015)

Can you get a better job?

Sounds like your husband has lots of issues, including some mental health issues. Is he depressed?

He sounds very abusive. I would start saving some money on the side and figure out the cost of you renting a small apartment with living expenses. Your husband sounds very unpleasant.


----------



## Young at Heart (Jan 6, 2015)

Samape1 said:


> I’ve been married 9 years. Our marriage just seems to keep getting crazier. We have one child. I try everyday to be positive with my husband but he doesn’t like anything I do. I’m always doing something incorrectly. I never seem to be able to do anything right. He gets frustrated if I even ask him a question or talk to him. He goes off and does his own thing the majority of the time- get mad if I call him. He says there isn’t anyone else, and for some reason I believe that. I try to spend family time with him, but he gets mad within minutes and makes it not worth it. He blames me for everything. He’s rude to my family, won’t let my parent over. He blames me for not spending quality time with our daughter- says I won’t let him. He took his checks out of the bank and is spending through all of our savings. Says he’s always leaving and then says he isn’t. I don’t want him to because I don’t feel comfortable having our daughter alone with him. Im stressed and don’t know what else to do. I do have a job, but don’t really make a lot. He says he refuses to let my daughter and I leave the state we live so I can get a better position. My parents won’t let my daughter and I live with them- they say they don’t have the room and we don’t have any other options in that area. Please assist.


OK you have given us the "glass is half empty" perspective. What has he ever done right? If it truly is nothing, then divorce him. 

I would wager that the does have some good qualities, but you are just fixated on the bad ones as a way of trying to talk yourself into something, possibly divorce and are looking to TAM to help convince you into doing that. I mean leaving him to go to another state doesn't sound like a way to build a stronger marriage.

Good luck and you might try marriage counseling.


----------



## Cooper (Apr 18, 2008)

Is it possible he's doing drugs? Is there any material things you see him spending all your savings on? I think you need to become proactive and find out what is going on as well as planning a safe exit for you and your daughter, that means a little money and a place to go.


----------



## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

@Samape1 When will he start acting like a husband and a father?

You need to see a lawyer to protect the interests of you and your daughter.


----------



## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

Has he always been a jerk or is this something new?

He may have been nice to you while he was courting you but was he a jerk to everyone else before you got married?

If he has always been a jerk to everyone else, now you are married and have kids, you are just another face in the crowd and so he is a jerk to you as well. 

If this is a sincere change in behavior, then it is one or both of these two things -

- cheating (look through his phone, computers, have someone follow him etc and you will find the proof) 

- drugs. (same thing. Seek and yee shall find)


----------



## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

oldshirt said:


> Has he always been a jerk or is this something new?
> 
> He may have been nice to you while he was courting you but was he a jerk to everyone else before you got married?
> 
> ...


Oh, and even if he has always been a jerk, that does not rule out cheating (or drugs for that matter) Jerks cheat. It's what they do.


----------



## ILoveSparkles (Oct 28, 2013)

Samape1 said:


> I’ve been married 9 years. Our marriage just seems to keep getting crazier. We have one child. I try everyday to be positive with my husband but he doesn’t like anything I do. I’m always doing something incorrectly. I never seem to be able to do anything right. He gets frustrated if I even ask him a question or talk to him. He goes off and does his own thing the majority of the time- get mad if I call him. He says there isn’t anyone else, and for some reason I believe that. I try to spend family time with him, but he gets mad within minutes and makes it not worth it. He blames me for everything. He’s rude to my family, won’t let my parent over. He blames me for not spending quality time with our daughter- says I won’t let him. He took his checks out of the bank and is spending through all of our savings. Says he’s always leaving and then says he isn’t. *I don’t want him to because I don’t feel comfortable having our daughter alone with him.* Im stressed and don’t know what else to do. I do have a job, but don’t really make a lot. He says he refuses to let my daughter and I leave the state we live so I can get a better position. My parents won’t let my daughter and I live with them- they say they don’t have the room and we don’t have any other options in that area. Please assist.


Why do not want your daughter to be alone with with her father? That's the biggest issue here IMO.


----------



## Samape1 (Mar 5, 2018)

*Spouse moving out*

I’ve been married almost 10 years. Our marriage just seems to keep getting crazier. We have one child. I try everyday to be positive with my husband but he doesn’t like anything I do. I’m always doing something incorrectly. I never seem to be able to do anything right. He gets frustrated if I even ask him a question or talk to him. He goes off and does his own thing the majority of the time- gets mad if I call him. Yesterday he said he is moving out in a. Few weeks. That will really destroy us financially. He then told me he’s divorcing me. He says there isn’t anyone else, and for some reason I believe that. I try to spend family time with him, but he gets mad within minutes and makes it not worth it. He blames me for everything. He blames me for not spending quality time with our daughter- says I won’t let him. He’s always going out and leaving us to do his hobbies when we ask him to hang out. Im stressed and don’t know what else to do. I do have a job, but don’t really make a lot. He says he refuses to let my daughter and I leave the state we live so I can get a better position. My parents won’t let my daughter and I live with them- they say they don’t have the room and we don’t have any other options in that area. Please assist.


----------



## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

*Re: Spouse moving out*



Samape1 said:


> I’ve been married almost 10 years. Our marriage just seems to keep getting crazier. We have one child. I try everyday to be positive with my husband but he doesn’t like anything I do. I’m always doing something incorrectly. I never seem to be able to do anything right. He gets frustrated if I even ask him a question or talk to him. He goes off and does his own thing the majority of the time- gets mad if I call him. Yesterday he said he is moving out in a. Few weeks. That will really destroy us financially. He then told me he’s divorcing me. He says there isn’t anyone else, and for some reason I believe that. I try to spend family time with him, but he gets mad within minutes and makes it not worth it. He blames me for everything. He blames me for not spending quality time with our daughter- says I won’t let him. He’s always going out and leaving us to do his hobbies when we ask him to hang out. Im stressed and don’t know what else to do. I do have a job, but don’t really make a lot. He says he refuses to let my daughter and I leave the state we live so I can get a better position. My parents won’t let my daughter and I live with them- they say they don’t have the room and we don’t have any other options in that area. Please assist.


YOu repeated the same posting of a couple of months ago and never replied to the posters here?


----------



## SentHereForAReason (Oct 25, 2017)

*Re: Spouse moving out*



aine said:


> YOu repeated the same posting of a couple of months ago and never replied to the posters here?


We may have just uncovered a devious plot by TAM! Only half of the posters are real and the other half are AI Robots used to spark conversations and web traffic but this one has gone rogue


----------



## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

*Re: Spouse moving out*



Samape1 said:


> I’ve been married almost 10 years. Our marriage just seems to keep getting crazier. We have one child. I try everyday to be positive with my husband but he doesn’t like anything I do. I’m always doing something incorrectly. I never seem to be able to do anything right. He gets frustrated if I even ask him a question or talk to him. He goes off and does his own thing the majority of the time- gets mad if I call him. Yesterday he said he is moving out in a. Few weeks. That will really destroy us financially. He then told me he’s divorcing me. He says there isn’t anyone else, and for some reason I believe that. I try to spend family time with him, but he gets mad within minutes and makes it not worth it. He blames me for everything. He blames me for not spending quality time with our daughter- says I won’t let him. He’s always going out and leaving us to do his hobbies when we ask him to hang out. Im stressed and don’t know what else to do. I do have a job, but don’t really make a lot. He says he refuses to let my daughter and I leave the state we live so I can get a better position. My parents won’t let my daughter and I live with them- they say they don’t have the room and we don’t have any other options in that area. Please assist.


You must seek legal advice to protect yourself and your daughter.


----------



## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Samape1 said:


> I’ve been married 9 years. Our marriage just seems to keep getting crazier. We have one child. I try everyday to be positive with my husband but he doesn’t like anything I do. I’m always doing something incorrectly. I never seem to be able to do anything right. He gets frustrated if I even ask him a question or talk to him. He goes off and does his own thing the majority of the time- get mad if I call him. He says there isn’t anyone else, and for some reason I believe that. I try to spend family time with him, but he gets mad within minutes and makes it not worth it. He blames me for everything. He’s rude to my family, won’t let my parent over. He blames me for not spending quality time with our daughter- says I won’t let him. He took his checks out of the bank and is spending through all of our savings. Says he’s always leaving and then says he isn’t. I don’t want him to because I don’t feel comfortable having our daughter alone with him. Im stressed and don’t know what else to do. I do have a job, but don’t really make a lot. He says he refuses to let my daughter and I leave the state we live so I can get a better position. My parents won’t let my daughter and I live with them- they say they don’t have the room and we don’t have any other options in that area. Please assist.


Are you in the United States?

Oh. Never mind.


----------

