# First Date with Wife After 4-1/2 Months



## StandbyMe (Aug 5, 2011)

Just when I thought it was over (I had already begun my search for a divorce lawyer) I have a date with my wife tomorrow night. After 4-1/2 months my first actual date. We have seen each other maybe 4 times since she left me back in July but for the most part it was family functions. I will be very nervous but I am hoping this is the first step in reconciliation. There has been a lot of emotion between the two of us but hopefully we can move past that at some point. Any suggestion's for the first date would be appreciated.


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## TroubldHusband (Nov 29, 2011)

Truly happy that you are getting back in touch and going on a date!! :smthumbup:

One step at a time. Wish I were there already, but we've only been separated for two months and things are moving slowly at this point, though they do seem to be positive. 

As far as dates... I would keep it casual, but personal. I would say no to a movie, unless it's something you two always enjoyed doing together. With movies you spend more time avoiding each other and conversation than anything, and right now you probably both want to just enjoy each others' company, make small-talk, and have a good time. I would suggest a nice dinner somewhere and then something simple. Something that won't put a lot of pressure or strain on things. Take a walk, or maybe go rollerskating or ice skating? Lots of outdoor arenas in Chicago at this time of year and they all are lit up and decorated amazingly for the holidays. I'm sure other colder cities have similar things. I played hockey 15 years so I enjoy skating (rollerblade/skates or ice skates) and that's something I'm hoping I can plan with my wife if things keep moving in a positive direction, just cus it's romantic this time of year with all the decorations and lights and hustle/bustle of the busy city around the holidays. 

Like I said, keep it simple and relaxed, and don't put too much pressure on things. You want her coming back for another one


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## blueskies30 (Jan 27, 2010)

I'm happy for you Me and my husband have been seperated since Aug 28th and have been communicating since Oct 3rd. It was a slow and painful processof many ups and downs, but I think we are finally hopefully not going to have have so many downs where I feel as though I've suddenly fallen off of a cliff!!

We have not had a date yet. My husband has not wanted to go out on one, but we have gone shopping alone without kids together. Been to family functions as a family. He has come to the house to fix things, which makes me happy because it shows he really does care about making life easier for me.

We talk on the phone every day when he gets off work and has cell signal, like clockwork every day at 5:15 and he calls often because he is wondering what I'm doing. He does not get great signal when at home at his parents so we text for about 2 hrs every night. 

Our cell phone bills went seperate as soon as the seperation happened. Last week we ordered new cell phones with another carrier where he is the bill owner and phones are on a family plan. We both just ported our phone numbers to the new carrier last night. 

I informed him last night that I put my wedding ring back on. Our come together has been slow, but we have accomplished a lot of communication and putting years of hurt behind us (at least on my part). We both relized what was not working in the marriage and I think tons of BIG BIG things have been fixed. We have both admitted our mistakes. 

For us its communication was started on Oct 3rd when my husband asked me if I really wanted a divorce. I said "NO I did not!!" So now to the present day Dec 7th....We have made huge progress I feel.

No date yet though, 

I hope you have great progress too. Good luck!!!


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