# CoDependency



## Spartan01

So a lot of you recommended I seek a new therapist. Which I have done. I told him my story and he smiled. I asked why are you smiling. He said you have codependency. I asked how did you come up with that so quickly. He replied “because I am one”. 

Do any of you have experience with this? Is it curable? What needs to be done etc. I have began reading Codpendant No More which he recommended. Any other things you can think of as I am a little scared as to where this is going to lead. 


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## Mr. Nail

good deal a new therapist who "gets" you sounds promising. My sister is much less codependent than she was, so I guess treatment is effective.


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## Emerging Buddhist

This is an excellent book to start with... I own it.

https://www.amazon.com/Codependent-No-More-Controlling-Yourself/dp/0894864025


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## Tasorundo

I think it can definitely be worked on. I have issues with it, but I am far better now than before.


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## UpsideDownWorld11

Do you feel you are co-dependent? Do you have trouble saying no? Do you seek approval more than trusting yourself? I think that is all of us to some extent when in a commited relationship, but to differing extenses. But if you know you can walk away if the need arises, sounds unlikely. People with co-dependency like to project that onto other people, I've noticed.


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## BluesPower

Spartan01 said:


> So a lot of you recommended I seek a new therapist. Which I have done. I told him my story and he smiled. I asked why are you smiling. He said you have codependency. I asked how did you come up with that so quickly. He replied “because I am one”.
> 
> Do any of you have experience with this? Is it curable? What needs to be done etc. I have began reading Codpendant No More which he recommended. Any other things you can think of as I am a little scared as to where this is going to lead.


Don't freak out, it is curable, very curable. 

Where this is going go lead is 1) Kicking yourself in the Ass for being unhealthy and stupid enough to ever have fallen into this behavior pattern. 2) Starting to understand boundaries which is super healthy. 3) Starting to understand that self love, is not in an of itself, wrong. Loving yourself and having healthy boundaries. And it is not selfish. But by loving yourself, you learn how better to love others and still have good boundaries.

So if you stick with it, you will learn a lot. It should be a good ride...


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## aine

Follow Emerging Buddhist's advice, the book is very good. I have the hard copy and am listening to the audio version right now. In Chapter 2 or 3 it actually lists out the behaviors of a co dependent.
I was a co-dependent because of my H alcoholism, I think i am much better now but have to remind myself not to slip into old 'codie' behaviors. 
The book also discusses how to gt 'cured.'


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