# Things you do NOT miss



## AppleDucklings (Mar 27, 2011)

I saw this question asked on another marriage site and thought it was a good question. Is there anything about your spouse that you do NOT miss since they have been gone? For me, I do not miss the constant worry about where he is and why is he late from work again. I do not miss being ignored when I need attention, I do not miss being made to feel like I am stupid, I do not miss his lies, I do not miss having to walk around on eggshells for fear of making him mad, I do not miss trying to make him happy and getting nothing in return.


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## ClipClop (Apr 28, 2011)

For my ex-, him going out drinking after work and taking the kids only to places that served alcohol. The way he never really heard me. The way any serious conversation about us ended with him drinking himself stupid, and I mean stupid. The way he'd drink and drive and start to fall asleep and swerve and then deny it.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## 52flower (Mar 4, 2011)

I don't have to hesitate with my answer. His ability to be dishonest. How I felt I needed to constantly put energy into trying to find out if he was lying or not. His values that it was not necessary to be forthright unless he was found out, and then how he justified how it wasn't wrong. I can't believe how much energy it took out of me.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

The habitual silent treatments that would start unprovoked and sometimes last weeks
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## JustAGirl (Oct 1, 2010)

Oh boy! Here we go....his passive aggressive behavior, his unwillingness to talk - about anything other than what he wanted to talk about, his silent treatments, his lack of ability to have an open mind, making me feel unloved, ugly, fat, unattractive and most of all not being able to show me love....yep that'll do it for now 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## AppleDucklings (Mar 27, 2011)

52flower said:


> I don't have to hesitate with my answer. His ability to be dishonest. How I felt I needed to constantly put energy into trying to find out if he was lying or not. His values that it was not necessary to be forthright unless he was found out, and then how he justified how it wasn't wrong. I can't believe how much energy it took out of me.


My husband is this way also.


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## TotoWeRNotInKansasAnymore (Apr 7, 2011)

Let’s see …… Oh... oh ... I got it, the fact he could be a male chauvinistic jerk all too often! Yep, that about sums things pretty good!


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## 2xloser (May 8, 2011)

The way she smells, her hair, the way she feels, her eyes, the way she smiles, the way we talked... 

OH yeah --and being able to trust her....


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## Neonwhizz (May 26, 2011)

Things I don't miss include:

Having to worry about other guys hitting on her at work and her not wanting to appear "impolite" and playing along
Having to tolerate her excessive shopping and spending habbit
Having to devote all my time to her but not get the same back in return
Having to worry about what I am allowed to talk about so as not to start a temper tantrum followed by silent treatment


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## Lilyana (Apr 12, 2011)

I don't miss a damn thing about him.. sad but true. 

Wait.. theres one thing I do miss. He is tall and changed lightbulbs for me when they went out. I can't reach them, being only 5'1", without carting a step stool with me. 

Thats the only thing I can think of that I actually miss.


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## rider03 (Apr 7, 2009)

Her inconsiderate behavior. Never ever thinking about others first. Making me and the kids sit in the car and wait for her every single time we went somewhere.

Her inability to keep the house at least somewhat clean.

Putting me dead last on the family list of importance.

The lack of sex. Although I'm still missing that but I'm not divorced yet.


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## Shooboomafoo (Mar 30, 2011)

Things I wont miss:
1) the incapacity to admit and apologize for the smallest mistakes, blaming everything and everyone except herself.
2) wrapping my arms around her and being told shes "busy" wiping off the countertop in the kitchen. too "busy" for simple affection.
3) the incapacity to apologize. Often turning an error of her own doing, into a wildly martyristic fantasy that somehow was for my own good?!?!
4.) constant posts from her boyfriends on her facebook page.
5.) her midlife crisis desperate search for attention from everyone else.
6.) her horrible spending habits and debt pile.
7.) being told I am whiny or needy, when the fact was simple closeness and an emotional tie was completely missing.
8.) being blamed for having a problem with her horribly abusive emotional baggage.
9.) I wont miss watching her mental crisis deteriorate, and being "there" for her.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Shooboomafoo said:


> 3) the incapacity to apologize. Often turning an error of her own doing, into a wildly martyristic fantasy that somehow was for my own good?!?!


I don't miss that one either!


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## WhiteRabbit (May 11, 2011)

The one thing about him I will not miss is his inability to see the world outside of his own little bubble.in other words,his inability to see how his actions and words create a ripple over the lives of others.

The list of things I will miss is much longer for now as expected this early in being apart.


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## Shooboomafoo (Mar 30, 2011)

"The one thing about him I will not miss is his inability to see the world outside of his own little bubble.in other words,his inability to see how his actions and words create a ripple over the lives of others." --WR


---INDEED! Often I thought that its impossible for people to be so self centered as to not realize how their actions affect others. Quotes that come to mind that I have heard from STBXW were:
---"I just have to live with the decisions Ive made, good and bad"
---"I didnt tell him I was divorced!!!"
---" I still hope we can be friends" 
...is there such a thing as narcissitic personality disorder?


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

^ Yes. It's called NPD. LOL. 

_Narcissistic personality disorder is a condition in which people have an inflated sense of self-importance and an extreme preoccupation with themselves_

Narcissistic personality disorder - PubMed Health


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## LonelyNLost (Dec 11, 2010)

I don't miss....

-the yucky shavings on the shower wall
-pee on the toilet seat and floor
-clothes laying on the couch from the night before
-the dirty cups from the chewing tobacco
-having to worry about when he was coming home, because now it's all MY time
-sitting and begging for attention
-the way he hated to see the kids' toys laying around
-his issues with clutter
-the bills going unpaid because he said he'd pay them
-waiting to start my day because he was sleeping in while we all waited
-the yard not getting mowed because he's lazy...now it doesn't get mowed because there's no man!
-looking at my phone all day waiting for a text to show he was thinking of me
-asking for date night to no avail
-feeling sick to my stomach because of the limbo and uncertainty
-complete disrespect of myself and loss of my dignity

Oh and I completely AGREE with this, WhiteRabbit... "The one thing about him I will not miss is his inability to see the world outside of his own little bubble.in other words,his inability to see how his actions and words create a ripple over the lives of others." --WR

Wow, guess I could go on and on. I'm HAPPY now!


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## JustAGirl (Oct 1, 2010)

2xloser said:


> The way she smells, her hair, the way she feels, her eyes, the way she smiles, the way we talked...
> 
> OH yeah --and being able to trust her....


oh....wow


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## JewelryVixen305 (May 19, 2011)

JustAGirl said:


> Oh boy! Here we go....his passive aggressive behavior, his unwillingness to talk - about anything other than what he wanted to talk about, his silent treatments, his lack of ability to have an open mind, making me feel unloved, ugly, fat, unattractive and most of all not being able to show me love....yep that'll do it for now
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


minus the feelings of ugly fat and unattractive. I don't miss him running to his grandmother with our problems to make me look bad. Him really thinking he is a real man when he is so far from that.


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