# I am not a psychologist, get some damn help



## Layla83 (Sep 21, 2011)

Im in my late 20's, he is in his early 40's. About 3 years ago he was diagnosed with severe depression and was put on meds. He then went off the meds after one year (which was the best year in all the seven years together) and went off because it made him feel 'numb'. Wow that year I could be myself, feel at peace and no road rage. Things went 'ok' for a while but somethings triggered his depression again and now he tells me things like he is suicidal and wants to run away sometimes. We must have sex twice a year. No hugs or real kisses. Just pecks at hello and goodbye. We dont even sit on the same couch. I work a fulltime job and him but when we get home i must tend to the house, cook and look after our 3 and 1 year olds. In all this time he is laying on the couch watching tv. 
I am so lonely and sad in this but how could i possibly leave someone who is already so suicidal and feeling sorry for himself. 
I do not have that kind of courage to do that although sometimes I feel I wish he would leave me. 
I can not help him as i dont have the knowledge to deal with this kind of depression but he wont go on anti-depressants again. I am not really asking a question but would just like to know how do you deal with this kind of spouse.


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