# I think I have relationship anxiety? Help Please.



## IMtheman23 (May 17, 2011)

For starters I am 22 years old and I am in my first relationship. So the girl I am currently with I have been dating for about 2 months. We were friends for about 3 years, and we decided to take it to the next level recently. I started having feelings for her about 2 months ago, and we already knew each other pretty well so it was easy for us to figure out if we wanted to be together. We started dating, I was so happy to finally have found a girl that I really like and who liked me, I never had that before. A month or so after we started dating, I started overthinking everything. At times I felt like I was in love with her, and then at times I was questioning do I really like her? Sometimes, I am at peace with myself and that is when I have the strongest feelings for her. I have actually fallen in love with her, and I told her I love her. I meant everything that I said to her, and I wasn't making anything up. When I start having idle time to think about things, is when I start overanalyzing everything. I really do love her, she is amazing, she is great, she's everything I'd ever want. So why do I question myself?

And I have alot of idle time at work where I can think to myself, and this is when I start falling into those thoughts. I think about her ALL THE TIME and thats why I start thinking about it and I feel guilty if I try to stop thinking about it/her because then it's me not having "feelings" for her, when I really have the strongest feelings I've ever had for someone when I don't think about these things.


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## BigToe (Jun 2, 2011)

Maybe because you are still thinking of her as a friend, instead of a girlfriend? I'm not sure what the answer is, but you've only been going out two months. Give it time. Forget about analyzing anything at this point. Just go out, have a good time, get to know her. If the relationship develops further, let it, don't analyze it.


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## IMtheman23 (May 17, 2011)

BigToe said:


> Maybe because you are still thinking of her as a friend, instead of a girlfriend? I'm not sure what the answer is, but you've only been going out two months. Give it time. Forget about analyzing anything at this point. Just go out, have a good time, get to know her. If the relationship develops further, let it, don't analyze it.


I don't think its that. I have developed really strong feelings for her, and I don't see her as just a friend anymore. I wouldn't have asked her to be my girlfriend and be with her if I didn't want to, to begin with. Everything was good to begin with, and after some time is when I started overthinking it all. She really is great, I've fallen in love with her and I love her and I will tell the whole world that. There's just sometimes for some reason I start questioning everything.


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## BigToe (Jun 2, 2011)

Well what are you questioning? Are you questioning whether you are gay? Are you questioning whether she is pretty enough for you, wealthy enough for you, can cook and clean for you? Are you questioning whether she is a *****, being true to you? Are you questioning whether she loves you back, whether you are ready for this kind of relationship, or is she enjoys circuses, cowboy movies?

I guess I could keep on asking questions but it we'd get there faster if you stated exactly what it was you were questioning.


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## CoffeeTime (Jul 3, 2011)

IMtheman23 said:


> For starters I am 22 years old and I am in my first relationship. So the girl I am currently with I have been dating for about 2 months. We were friends for about 3 years, and we decided to take it to the next level recently. I started having feelings for her about 2 months ago, and we already knew each other pretty well so it was easy for us to figure out if we wanted to be together. We started dating, I was so happy to finally have found a girl that I really like and who liked me, I never had that before. A month or so after we started dating, I started overthinking everything. At times I felt like I was in love with her, and then at times I was questioning do I really like her? Sometimes, I am at peace with myself and that is when I have the strongest feelings for her. I have actually fallen in love with her, and I told her I love her. I meant everything that I said to her, and I wasn't making anything up. When I start having idle time to think about things, is when I start overanalyzing everything. I really do love her, she is amazing, she is great, she's everything I'd ever want. So why do I question myself?
> 
> And I have alot of idle time at work where I can think to myself, and this is when I start falling into those thoughts. I think about her ALL THE TIME and thats why I start thinking about it and I feel guilty if I try to stop thinking about it/her because then it's me not having "feelings" for her, when I really have the strongest feelings I've ever had for someone when I don't think about these things.


Sounds like you are just scared. Sometimes over analyzing too much is just a self defensive action protecting vulnerable feelings. Vulnerability is sometimes one of the most scariest things in life


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## Akki (Nov 5, 2011)

I face same circumstances...overanalysing abt my boyfrnd and always fearing worst that may happen to our relatnship or we may get separated...though he is a wondrful guy who undrstnds me n lovs me alot bt i tend to overanalyse...I dnt knw hw to keep myslf at peace!! feel like dying...wot to do?


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## Stonewall (Jul 5, 2011)

you have a tendency towards generalized anxiety. This is easily treatable. See your physician.


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