# Hi yet not a new member, an absent (voice) member.



## Tomara (Jun 19, 2013)

There are many long time posters here that I admire. I have been not posted much here because of my horrific story. I didn't want my posts to show how jaded I was. 

I have come to realize that I am in total support of marriage. It's not easy but I believe it is a sanction that deserves top respect. 

You don't cheat, you don't lie, you don't withhold sex and intimacy. Without the above, you don't have a marriage or a good relationship. Your spouse should be your best friend.

If that is not what you have then I believe strongly let go. I have waited since 2001 to find that man that compliment me and makes me want to be the best "me". Everyone else in this journey was a heartache and a lesson, me being lacking or them lacking.

Ta da I know .......Hi I am Tomara!


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Hi Tomara!!

You are definitely an old-timer around here.


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

Uh, Hi!

My sword is still nicked and bent after I swung at the iron bar in your personality. I have a hard time saying taciturn, let alone confronting an angry version not in my lexicon.

That said.....Welcome!!


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## Tomara (Jun 19, 2013)

lol I just turned 54 so yes and old timer. I have held my tongue and not provided good advice. That I was a down fall on my part.


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## Tomara (Jun 19, 2013)

SCM I have grown since we tangled. When I introduced myself I reference my horrific past. I do not discount my trauma nor my triumphs. I am currently dealing with my mother who is dying. My life experiences are so small when I consider what is before me now. Will I have a little tougher exterior than a lot..... yep. But, my heart is now open, to loss, to love, really to actual life. Open is a pretty damn good feeling if I do say so myself


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