# I just suck at marriage



## ItsReallyMe (Jan 8, 2014)

Okay, this is my third marriage, so I think I can say that I TOTALLY SUCK at marriage.

I do NOT want to be married anymore. I really thought that the third time would be a charm -- first time I was too young and second time husband cheated when I had a small child (under 2) but now I think it is me. Or, at least, the men that I choose.

Now I have been married almost 12 years to a man that I can no longer stand. We haven't had sex for almost five years, and he is verbally cruel to my son (his stepson). Also, when he drinks his personality changes to something that I can barely tolerate. 

I thought I had learned something from my first two marriages, but obviously, I have not learned a thing. Still chose the WRONG person. 

Now what -- be a 3-time loser? Divorce again? It is all complicated by the fact that I am the real breadwinner in the family so if I dump him, it has serious financial repercussions for him. I feel guilty about that, as I don't think HE wants a divorce or separation at all. But -- I am going a little crazy. I don't want another man. I have NO other lover. I just want to be alone.

Part of it is me, I know. I just shouldn't be married. 

So -- what now?


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## Another Planet (Aug 8, 2012)

Be single.


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## ne9907 (Jul 17, 2013)

After being divorce for the first time, some of us blame the ex instead of focusing on our own failings and how we contributed to make the marriage fail. This behavior does not allow us to grow as individuals and seek better mates, as a result we keep making the same mistake and pick the same type of relationship.

Your husband should not be mean to your son. Children come first. If you seriously cannot live with him, get a divorce, enjoy being by yourself. Find out what makes you and do not make the mistake of marrying again without finding out WHO YOU ARE!


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## wilderness (Jan 9, 2013)

Stay married. You agreed to a lifelong marriage contract. Honor your contract.


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

ItsReallyMe said:


> Okay, this is my third marriage, so I think I can say that I TOTALLY SUCK at marriage.
> 
> I do NOT want to be married anymore. I really thought that the third time would be a charm -- first time I was too young and second time husband cheated when I had a small child (under 2) but now I think it is me. Or, at least, the men that I choose.
> 
> ...


I find it extremely difficult to call someone who leaves a cruel drunk (including cruelty to a child) a loser. Except in the sense of losing excess baggage.


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## Fordsvt (Dec 24, 2010)

Why even post this ? It's quite obvious you know what needs to be done. 
You hate your marriage. 
He is a cruel drunk that a uses kids. 
Hmmm what to do ?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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