# Am i wrong?



## Savywife84 (Jan 2, 2012)

My husband of two years and I had his mother who is divorced and recently broke up with her bf over our house. We were watching a movie and out of no where she asks my husband if he finds latin women attractive. He responds then she replies "We'll do you like to look at them"? I found this to be totally inappropriate..what mother asks her son who is married who he finds attractive,especially in front of his wife. I am very attractive,fit and intelligent. I just felt like this was very odd especially for a mother to say/ask. This is not the first time she has commented in front of me about other females to my husband. She has in the past tried to control situations between my husband and I, and to influence him into doing the opposite of what we agreed upon. Am I wrong for thinking these comments are strange and maybe she is trying to start a disagreement between us?


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

A mother in law who's a sh^t stirrer? Never seen that.


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## Savywife84 (Jan 2, 2012)

Are you being sarcastic or you really never have? So you think she is trying to start problems? The only thing I can think of is she wants attention/or is jealous that her son does not really depend on her anymore.Before we were together he depended on her for a ton of things,now he is more independent and I am there for him.


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## s.k (Feb 27, 2010)

no the comments are strange for a mum to ask her son if other women are attractive think you should have a word with your husband you dont want this to cause problems for the two of you


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## tacoma (May 1, 2011)

In the context of that single comment I don't think the question is inappropriate.

If you feel it's just one part of a larger scenario it could be but you'd have to supply to context of the larger scenario.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Savywife84 (Jan 2, 2012)

I have talked to my MIL and husband about it. She said she was "just joking",but I do not think this is the case since she went on and on about it in a provoking manner. When I told him that I brought it up to her he accused me of trying to start trouble. I just don't know how much more I can take since I am always the one in the wrong when his family instigates. I have never had so many issues with another bf's family as I do with my current husband's family.


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## CandieGirl (Apr 27, 2011)

Ya...lot's of people claim to be 'just joking' after you call them out on the carpet because of their crap. She's a sh!t disturber...don't let her get to you.


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## Savywife84 (Jan 2, 2012)

Tacoma, I have to supply to context of the larger scenario? How is it appropriate to make such comments to your married son?


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## s.k (Feb 27, 2010)

Savywife84 said:


> I have talked to my MIL and husband about it. She said she was "just joking",but I do not think this is the case since she went on and on about it in a provoking manner. When I told him that I brought it up to her he accused me of trying to start trouble. I just don't know how much more I can take since I am always the one in the wrong when his family instigates. I have never had so many issues with another bf's family as I do with my current husband's family.


Its obviously not a joke if shes done it on more than one occasion, I think you should ask your husband how is asking their mil who makes stupid comments and asks stupid questions causing trouble also I think you should ask him the obvious if your family asked you if you liked paticular guys in front of him and you responded how wopuld that make you feel is a mummys boy??


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## Savywife84 (Jan 2, 2012)

Yes, CandieGirl I think your right. What would you do if you were in this situation with a MIL like her?


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## CandieGirl (Apr 27, 2011)

Savywife84 said:


> Yes, CandieGirl I think your right. What would you do if you were in this situation with a MIL like her?


I would confront her - or get your H to speak to her. Even if she uses the just joking excuse again, it just might be enough to deter her from continuing with this insulting behavior. 

Is she elderly? I ask because my FIL is, and constantly brings up my H's ex, but it isn't done in a malicious way at all. So could this be the case with your MIL?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Savywife84 (Jan 2, 2012)

No she is far from elderly she is only in her 50's. I have tried to be nice to her and the family but I just cannot take these insults anymore.


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

No. That's just weird.
You know, you can get a Carmen Miranda hat from a costume store and learn a little Espanol, pick up salsa from UTube instructional videos and cook some black beans and rice, with some flan. See how that sits with her. Ask her, do you like Spanish woman? Start watching movies with the Spanish language option. Only watch Spanish cable channels. If she tells you to knock it off, switch to a fake mustache, and ask "Te gusta hombres espanol?  If she wants a Hispanic daughter-in-law, let her try one on for size.

Honestly, her ex-bf probably is dating a Latino. He probably fed her some line about how all men are hot for Latino chicks. Like they're uniformly homogenous or something. I don't like your MIL's comment just because it's racist. My soon to be former inlaws were horrible. FIL said all kinds of stupid stuff about blacks and Latinos. Ummmmm, hello, I'm MUCH darker in the summer, potato head.


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

by be she caught her bot friend looking at latin porn?and was wondering what the attraction was.

???????


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## ARF (Jan 26, 2011)

I think you might be making a bigger deal out of the comment then you need to. Ignore it, don't over think it. Even if she is stirring the pot, you should ignore it unless your hubby gets caught up in it.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Should have said, "He doesn't, but I do! Rawr!"


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## TDSC60 (Dec 8, 2011)

Savywife84 said:


> My husband of two years and I had his mother who is divorced and recently broke up with her bf over our house. We were watching a movie and out of no where she asks my husband if he finds latin women attractive. He responds then she replies "We'll do you like to look at them"? I found this to be totally inappropriate..what mother asks her son who is married who he finds attractive,especially in front of his wife. I am very attractive,fit and intelligent. I just felt like this was very odd especially for a mother to say/ask. This is not the first time she has commented in front of me about other females to my husband. She has in the past tried to control situations between my husband and I, and to influence him into doing the opposite of what we agreed upon. Am I wrong for thinking these comments are strange and maybe she is trying to start a disagreement between us?


No question that she is trying to make trouble.

My MIL (the wicked witch of the north) was the same way. Got so bad that it really caused stress in my marriage. Talk to your husband about this. Might not do much good, but it might open his eyes. My wife understood after I talked to her and we were OK, but she never spoke to her mother about it and continued to make excuses for her.


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## SockPuppet (May 16, 2011)

Savywife84: Take the time to read everyones input and not just those that agree with your line of thinking.

Tacoma asks a valid question.

If your MIL is making these small random comments, they could very well be innocent things, maybe even intended as funny.

Based upon the original post, it sounds to me like the comment was made just to stir the pot, and you fell for it, hook line and sinker. You know MIL better than we, perhaps you should read a couple of books on comedians so that you have a funny response ready for MIL next "comment".

Or, dont take it personally. If your Husband isnt taking his mothers side he isnt a mommys boy. If he doesnt come to your aid, and the two of you are in a good place, then he sees the comment as innocent.


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## tacoma (May 1, 2011)

Savywife84 said:


> Tacoma, I have to supply to context of the larger scenario? How is it appropriate to make such comments to your married son?


Yes, you do.

I don`t find asking a simple question inappropriate regardless of whether or not it involves what type of people you`re attracted to.

In the context of a larger picture where she`s doing it for ulterior motives then yes it could be seen as inappropriate but as the questions stands alone and without context I don`t have a problem with it.

My mother and I were thick as thieves there were no boundaries on the content of our discussions.
She often asked me if I found a certain woman attractive or even a certain type of woman.

Not inappropriate on it`s own.


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## Dellia (Jan 6, 2012)

Joking or not, why would she ask her married son if he finds ANY woman besides you attractive? It's rude.


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