# Quick question need quick answer something is about to pop



## jupiter13 (Jun 8, 2012)

It has been 18 months since......
I have given him "The Letter" after rewriting it some. He knows I didn't write it and I will tell him so. 
I also sent him this

"You can't possibly know right now how you are going to feel in the long run. People always regret jumping to reconciliation, especially since their WS's are lying, lying, lying at every turn. You don't want to agree to your future based on a pack of lies."

You offer no honest disclosure without attitude and you have not suffered consequences. What are you going to do to make this situation right and fair to me? 

His answer: "I am working with you and we both have come a long ways."

A building has called back and are interested in our business expansion. I can not talk about it don't even want to hear about it it gets to grow while I get to sit here and wonder? He has put all his energy into the business. I could use it as a tool "no building until I get disclosure." It feels so wrong to do this. I can not leave the home I have 3 small grand kids and we are the only stability they know right now. I am lost again. Must I continue to put my needs and feelings on the shelf for everyone else? For the kids I would do anything but for the buisness I am done making sacrifices. He meet the OW and OM husband and wife team as new clients and according to him nothing happened till right before I went into hospital in June 2011. Operation July Home Aug. Beat me while telling me high on drugs Sept. 1, 2011. Something just don't smell right to me. Need some back bone and encouragement to hold my ground on this. Thank You


----------



## brokenhearted118 (Jan 31, 2013)

Hold your ground and do not waiver on this. If full disclosure is what you want in order for his needs to be met...get full disclosure and all the info you want! No more Monty Hall, Let's Make A Deal. This time around for you should be the following: My Way or Take The Highway! Go get what YOU need Jupiter, this is your time to shine!


----------



## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

Stand your ground. My estranged husband did something similar with our business. He entered into a contact to buy out a competitor even after I told him not to. That was 7 years ago and it didn't end well. If your husband has other distractions, he probably isn't making sound business decisions. Go with your gut feelings on this one.


----------



## jupiter13 (Jun 8, 2012)

Well he's come home with attitude. Went straight in and got me all the paperwork and then got everything ready for tomorrow. got mad at the dogs and shut them out of the bedroom. I had to go in to get something and found him reading the book "After the Affair." He had mentioned earlier that he had read 10 pages. Now he's in bed with the lights on and I can hear him snoring. He even was snappy at me for asking some question about the paperwork. Looked him right in the eye and told him, "Don't snap at me like that I don't appreciate it." So avoiding again. I have to reschedule our MC appointment so the sooner the better. I hate this. I am reading Not Just Friends, just got through the introduction and already in tears. Thank you for encouageing me to stand up for myself I need to do this. I am a doormat for everybody is what I am finding. Thank you again. We'll see what tomorrow holds. Most likly he will be like nothing happened.


----------



## Headspin (May 13, 2012)

jupiter13 said:


> It has been 18 months since......
> I have given him "The Letter" after rewriting it some. He knows I didn't write it and I will tell him so.
> I also sent him this
> 
> ...


look I think we would appreciate you maybe re writing this in slightly more fuller and clearer terms - at the moment it's all too abbreviated and a bit text speak almost ( which I hate !)
Can you do that please and maybe we'll get the full picture about it all and hopefully you'll get more pertinent advice
(It might just be my stupidity but I can't quite get what is going on here) 

That said from what I can gather from this it sounds like you need to 'woman up' 
Close everything down this instant and take complete control, the control he obviously feels he has about you and the life you lead

This instant now at 030am UK as I type this

Tell him how you intend dealing with everything without his opinion involved, be it separate lives divorce kids etc etc 
He'll soon wake up to that trust me

(I could be reading this wrong apologies if I am)


----------



## Thorburn (Nov 23, 2011)

Your post was confusing but here is my take.

Say D is in your future. If you are now financially stable and will benefit in the D as things are right now then stand your ground on the expansion. 

If the expansion is something that will not be too risky and you will benefit in the short term from agreeing to the expansion then go for it.

If the expansion will jepordize things and will only result in the possibility of a long term pay out don't do it.

Like above, woman up and stand your ground. 

He is acting like a knucklehead and right now seems like he does not give two hoots about you.


----------

