# the first full week *sigh*



## staircase (May 16, 2011)

My husband and I separated last year but were on our way to a great recovery-or so I thought. He dumped me right on my @ss last week.

I am sometimes  and sometimes  and most often  When does this level out to one or none of those emotions?


ok while I am looking through the smilies-does anyone know the appropriate use for these?? :butterfly: :fro:


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

staircase said:


> I am sometimes  and sometimes  and most often  When does this level out to one or none of those emotions?


Honestly it has taken me three years. I think I would have recovered much sooner had the divorce been quicker. It seems to take an emotional toll when you live in limbo and then the divorce is drawn out. I'm finally to the point of indifference--which is a good place.

As for the cute little icons....no clue!


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## staircase (May 16, 2011)

It's definitely been drawn out. We have lived apart for over a year. That whole time I've been waiting for the other shoe to drop but at the same time hopeful things will work out. This year has SUCKED.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

827Aug said:


> I think I would have recovered much sooner had the divorce been quicker. It seems to take an emotional toll when you live in limbo and then the divorce is drawn out.


Agreed. If my divorce woulda happened sooner I prob coulda moved on faster but separation to divorce was an entire 1.5 yr and we were in contact and sleeping together and going on vacation and talking daily almost The Entire Time. 

It's like we couldn't quit eachother and yet the D was still looming in the air. Bananas!

The sooner you accept he is done, the better for you. That way you can start preparing yourself for moving on with your life. The longer you cling or deny the reality of what has happened--the worst.

Break ups suck. Seriously. No matter how you slice it but there IS a light at the end of the tunnel and quite frankly: life DOES go on.


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## staircase (May 16, 2011)

Fantastic. Imagine my delight to see a text from my husband! Sadly the text was asking if the divorce papers had been drawn up. What little progress I have made this week is all gone.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Well honey you are still gonna have to deal with him re: the divorce. So don't think of it as a setback. yes, it sucks this is all reality but the divorce and legal portion are a necessary part.


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## staircase (May 16, 2011)

I know, thank you jellybeans. I guess I am holding out for a better outcome more than I thought I was. I just didn't expect to get a "where are the papers?" text. Go get your own f'cking lawyer if I am not giving you your divorce fast enough.


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## d1221 (Mar 13, 2011)

Staircase sorry to hear that.

Actions can be off balance and its hard to make sense of.

I am not realistically wanting to do this because in my mind this will be real. I know I have to push on than staying in limbo. My H cheated we agreed to divorce but he keeps avoiding me but is doing whatever. Sometimes actions do not add up. Hang in there.....we cannot avoid the inevitable but have to pray through it.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

staircase said:


> I know, thank you jellybeans. I guess I am holding out for a better outcome more than I thought I was.


Hope is always the last thing to die. And honestly, *hope* prolongs the pain so much more. It's best to just cut it off and move on, as hard as it is...

Re: divorce... are you going to file or is he? Maybe you could tell him to file since he wants out so bad...


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## Crankshaw (Jan 12, 2011)

Jellybeans said:


> Hope is always the last thing to die. And honestly, *hope* prolongs the pain so much more. It's best to just cut it off and move on, as hard as it is...


you can be, at times, such a hard ar*e with your replies, gotta love ya for that 



> Re: divorce... are you going to file or is he? Maybe you could tell him to file since he wants out so bad...


agreed 110%, he is the one who wants it, he should be the one who does the work to achieve what he wants.

Same for me, she is the one who wants it, she can shell out the time & $$ to achieve what she wants.

Is divorce the final straw in the relationship, not always, there are many who, after divorce, get back together with their ex partner and live long happy lives, but *never* count on that.


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