# How long before you (or your husband) can get another erection?



## wantshelp (Mar 10, 2016)

The refractory period is the time it takes a man to get another erection after ejaculation. The time generally gets longer with age. 

*How long before you (or your husband) can get another erection? And how does that impact your sex life? *

I'll start with me. In my 20s, it was 5-15 minutes. Now I am 40 and it is at least 1-2 hours for the erection to be hard enough to penetrate, but it is much harder if I wait 24 hours. The impact is that I'll try to make sure I take care of my partner before I ejaculate.


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## wantshelp (Mar 10, 2016)

From the Internet...

According to some studies, 18-year-old males have a refractory period of about 15 minutes, while those in their 70s take about 20 hours, with the average for all men being about a half-hour. Although rarer, some males exhibit no refractory period or a refractory period lasting less than 10 seconds.

Anybody here have a 10 second refractory period? :grin2:


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## Lurkster (Feb 8, 2016)

wantshelp said:


> From the Internet...
> 
> According to some studies, 18-year-old males have a refractory period of about 15 minutes, while those in their 70s take about 20 hours, with the average for all men being about a half-hour. Although rarer, some males exhibit no refractory period or a refractory period lasting less than 10 seconds.
> 
> Anybody here have a 10 second refractory period? :grin2:


Averages.....
But I think you'll findt numbers all over the place. 

In my 20's, after my first shot, I would usually not go very soft at all. 
After a second, I could be ready to go in 15 minutes. 

Now, 50's, I need 15-20 minutes after the first, and 30-40 after the second.

All has a lot to do with what me, she, and we, are doing after I unload. Mrs Lurkster has a method if she's not done yet, that she calls 'suck-starting'. :wink2:

:grin2:


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## wantshelp (Mar 10, 2016)

Lurkster said:


> ...Mrs Lurkster has a method if she's not done yet, that she calls 'suck-starting'. :wink2:
> :grin2:


Oh now, that's interesting. So if you ejaculate after PIV (or whatever), you can accelerate the next erection by her sucking? I guess that's like what a penis pump does. Does it stay firm enough for PIV when you do that or does it fade quickly when the sucking stops? That makes me think... what are people's experience with c*ck rings? Anyone used them to preserve an erection?


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## Lurkster (Feb 8, 2016)

wantshelp said:


> Oh now, that's interesting. So if you ejaculate after PIV (or whatever), you can accelerate the next erection by her sucking? I guess that's like what a penis pump does. That makes me think... what are people's experience with c*ck rings? Anyone used them to preserve an erection?


For me, it's more to do with the act of her sucking, and watching, than the sucking itself.
If your wife took you in her mouth, right after you shot a load in her, and you were still wet, dripping, and oozing with both your own and her fluids, I bet you would get harder faster too! :grin2:
Hotness accelerates the return of the bone.....

We tried a few **** rings, and didn't really achieve anything, but your results may vary. 

:laugh:


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## ChargingCharlie (Nov 14, 2012)

When I was in my mid-30's and having lots of sex, it wouldn't take too long - I could take a break and get back at it (and the GF was always ready). Now in my late 40's, on the very rare times that we have sex, once I'm done she's done.


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## EllisRedding (Apr 10, 2015)

No clue tbh. Once I have blown my load (which is always at the end of the session) we aren't looking to have sex again immediately. If I had to guess, about 15-30 minutes.

I know there are supps/medication that claim to help get you back up to the plate quicker (caber being one of them).


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## wantshelp (Mar 10, 2016)

EllisRedding said:


> I know there are supps/medication that claim to help get you back up to the plate quicker (caber being one of them).


Funny you should mention that. I have Cabergoline and the biggest change I saw was that the ejaculation was prolonged. I have heard that refractory period is shortened too, but have not taken it enough to have noticed that change.


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## Lurkster (Feb 8, 2016)

wantshelp said:


> Oh now, that's interesting. So if you ejaculate after PIV (or whatever), you can accelerate the next erection by her sucking? I guess that's like what a penis pump does. Does it stay firm enough for PIV when you do that or does it fade quickly when the sucking stops? That makes me think... what are people's experience with c*ck rings? Anyone used them to preserve an erection?


There are other methods besides suck-starting too. 
The biggest sex organ is the brain you know!!
:laugh:


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

In my opinion it depends on a variety of factors of which age is not as critical of a factor as one may think. 

The male refractory period is inversely proportional to the amount of time aroused prior to climax.

A) If a male is mildly aroused a day or two prior to sex, the refractory period will be minimal.

B) If a male is not very aroused prior to sex, the refractory period will be much more significant. 

For this reason the HD male that has been wanting and not had sex in a few days, he will seem insatiable as he will be immediately ready to go again regardless of age. Meanwhile when a wife convinces an LD husband to have sex that was not in the mood in the first place, he will not even want to think about it again for a few days at least. In my opinion many relationships do not appreciate this dynamic and focus too much on the act of sex itself as opposed to learning how to cultivate sexual arousal/desire and enjoying that BEFORE having sex.

Badsanta


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## TX-SC (Aug 25, 2015)

I'm 47. Honestly, if it's good sex and I'm highly aroused, I may have no refractory period at all. I'll just stay erect and keep going. The problem is achieving a second O. It usually takes a long time or may not happen at all. It's almost like drunk sex. You want it bad, but it's just out of reach.


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## Young at Heart (Jan 6, 2015)

wantshelp said:


> Oh now, that's interesting. So if you ejaculate after PIV (or whatever), you can accelerate the next erection by her sucking? I guess that's like what a penis pump does. Does it stay firm enough for PIV when you do that or does it fade quickly when the sucking stops? That makes me think... what are people's experience with c*ck rings? Anyone used them to preserve an erection?


C*ck rings, help one keep an erection after ejaculation, they don't change the time between erections. What I like about the CR is that after orgasm, it allows me to remain within and intimately connected with my W longer and those moments cuddling and holding each other while intimately connected are special.

I am a 67 year old man, who exercises fairly regularly. I can "pop" again within an half an hour to the next morning depending on stimulation. The mind is the biggest sex organ and mental stimulation as well as physical stimulation has a big effect on the ability to get it up. Pelvic floor muscle tone also has a big impact. 

Also there have been studies that being exposed to a different female's pheromones can quicken time to erection after ejaculation. However, most women wouldn't be happy with adding another female partner to your bed as a solution speeding things up.

For me I get to rarely find out what my resolution time is except for masturbation following PIV, as my wife is LD. But once in a Blue Moon.......:wink2:


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## EllisRedding (Apr 10, 2015)

Young at Heart said:


> Also there have been studies that being exposed to a different female's pheromones can quicken time to erection after ejaculation. However, most women wouldn't be happy with adding another female partner to your bed as a solution speeding things up.
> 
> :


Lol, I am cracking up here thinking about having a woman just sitting next to the bed so after you O you start sniffing her up to get a quicker erection :laugh:


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## alexm (Nov 29, 2008)

wantshelp said:


> From the Internet...
> 
> According to some studies, 18-year-old males have a refractory period of about 15 minutes, while those in their 70s take about 20 hours, with the average for all men being about a half-hour. Although rarer, some males exhibit no refractory period or a refractory period lasting less than 10 seconds.
> 
> Anybody here have a 10 second refractory period? :grin2:


Yes. I can stay hard if need be, and especially if I "keep going". My wife is multi-orgasmic, so she always has one or two or more before I do, but occasionally she's close to another one by the time I'm done, so I'll keep it going.

IME (I'm 40), it only goes soft when it's no longer in use. The thing is that if there's a round 2, with a break in between (which is very rare these days...) getting it back up again is not an issue, but it HURTS.

Once, when I was 17 or 18, my then girlfriend and I, out of pure boredom, decided to see how long we could have sex for, without stopping. She gave up first, after I had 7 orgasms, without taking my foot off the pedal. There is no way I could do that now, and I probably couldn't even have 2 that way, but I CAN keep going if necessary. What that time limit is now, I have no idea, and my wife would have zero interest in finding out, I'm sure!


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## alexm (Nov 29, 2008)

wantshelp said:


> Oh now, that's interesting. So if you ejaculate after PIV (or whatever), you can accelerate the next erection by her sucking? I guess that's like what a penis pump does. Does it stay firm enough for PIV when you do that or does it fade quickly when the sucking stops? That makes me think... what are people's experience with c*ck rings? Anyone used them to preserve an erection?


I use them occasionally to enhance the hardness. Being the age I'm at now, it's not what it used to be. Definitely nothing wrong with it, but for my wife, like most women, harder is better.


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## EllisRedding (Apr 10, 2015)

Sounds like the men of TAM should do one big Erection experiment tonight. Skype anyone??? :grin2:


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

Early 60s, and it varies depending on how tired I am and how much I've had to drink. It varies from no loss of erection after orgasm (half the time), to about 20 minutes to regain one. But, it is always at least 10 to 20 minutes for a second orgasm (sometimes longer these days), and increasingly longer until a third or sometimes fourth orgasm. I've always been this way, but slowing down some now.


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

Young at Heart said:


> Also there have been studies that being exposed to a different female's pheromones can quicken time to erection after ejaculation. However, most women wouldn't be happy with adding another female partner to your bed as a solution speeding things up.


There is probably some truth to that, as I'm ready to go again sooner when we've had threesomes.

Now if they can bottle those female pheromones, a scent diffuser in the room might work almost as well. Or maybe it would be more effective as an inhaler!


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## Lurkster (Feb 8, 2016)

EllisRedding said:


> Sounds like the men of TAM should do one big Erection experiment tonight. Skype anyone??? :grin2:


Oh no....a test.....

I better bone up on the subject....

:laugh:


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## EllisRedding (Apr 10, 2015)

Lurkster said:


> Oh no....a test.....
> 
> I better bone up on the subject....
> 
> :laugh:


I think we could take down the internet with this one. We can test out erection quality, refractory period, best costume (hotdog costume disallowed), and most importantly ... size!!!


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## EunuchMonk (Jan 3, 2016)

alexm said:


> Yes. I can stay hard if need be, and especially if I "keep going". My wife is multi-orgasmic, so she always has one or two or more before I do, but occasionally she's close to another one by the time I'm done, so I'll keep it going.
> 
> IME (I'm 40), it only goes soft when it's no longer in use. The thing is that if there's a round 2, with a break in between (which is very rare these days...) getting it back up again is not an issue, but it HURTS.
> 
> Once, when I was 17 or 18, my then girlfriend and I, out of pure boredom, *decided to see how long we could have sex for, without stopping.* She gave up first, after I had 7 orgasms, without taking my foot off the pedal. There is no way I could do that now, and I probably couldn't even have 2 that way, but I CAN keep going if necessary. What that time limit is now, I have no idea, and my wife would have zero interest in finding out, I'm sure!


You forgot to say how long it was....


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## LosingHim (Oct 20, 2015)

When my husband and I first started dating – when he was 21 until roughly 4 years ago (age 28) if he so desired, he could continue THROUGH ejaculation with an erection to #2. If he decided to stop in between, he could get another one whenever he felt the desire to again, whether it was 5 minutes later or a few hours. 

Now at 32, sometimes it’s not even the same day. Other times he can the same day, a few hours apart. But, he’s also dealing with intermittent ED due to diabetes. Just depends on the day and it’s almost like it goes it cycles. For a few weeks he’ll have very firm erections with not much down time in between, but then other weeks, the erections are barely firm enough to penetrate and there’s more recovery time in between – at least 24 hours.


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## DustyDog (Jul 12, 2016)

When I was in my 20s...well, to make sure I would last long enough for her pleasure, we always did something so I'd quickly take care of my "round 1"...and without delay, we'd be on to round 2, with no refractory period notable. As I aged, such a period showed up, but it was never long...if she was obviously interested in continuing, I was ready as soon as she was. 

Even now, at 60, if I'm with my naked wife...it's never so relaxed that we can't get something going.

My brothers have hinted they're about the same, so it could be genetic.

I don't tend to get comparative remarks from my SOs...but before I was married, I had two who claimed to be impressed at how long I could last, so I suppose in their worlds, I was...that end of average, I suppose.

The way I look at it, it's just OK...means it's not something I would have to worry about if I were to again have an SO who wanted sex more frequently than every five years.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

Lurkster said:


> For me, it's more to do with the act of her sucking, and watching, than the sucking itself.
> If your wife took you in her mouth, right after you shot a load in her, and you were still wet, dripping, and oozing with both your own and her fluids, I bet you would get harder faster too! :grin2:
> *Hotness accelerates the return of the bone.....
> *
> :laugh:


Wish this was the case for my husband ... not that we have tried RIGHT AFTER he blows.... we generally climax together like 95% of the time.. we're blissfully satisfied afterwards...

His lagging "Refractory period" caused me some worry yrs ago though...never cared or noticed till I had a sex drive increase (that was 8 yrs ago- what led me to this forum even)...suddenly I wanted to do it *3 times a day*....he couldn't keep up... not that he didn't' want to....he loved my enthusiasm, coming after him! 

I was beginning to take this "personal"...am I loosing it ?.. doesn't he desire me anymore? ...I'd let this play on my mind...Isn't this what every man wants?... 

I even scheduled him to get his testosterone checked ....he was on the lower end of normal.. The Doc just handed him some Viagra.. she made a comment his levels were normal for a 60 yr old man.. this worried me for months!.. yrs later he took another test.. they were higher.. (as I recall he was having some work stress during that time..then dealing with an insatiable wife)...

It sure wasn't cause I haven't tried.. I was buying books on how to please a man, went on a lingerie kick, introduced a lot of sexual novelty, new positions, places, I was always going down on him...we even went to the strip club together... anything that could turn him on.. was helping me out !..... 

He's 52 now... it seems he needs hours of sleep after he's ejaculated.. to get it back UP... 

I was in heaven days ago...we did it at 2:30 am.. then he was ready to go again 5 hrs later in the am brushing up against me ...I get like a little girl in the candy store... I took full advantage of that !

This can be achieved if we do it at night... Mornings are his best time... but if we had sex in the am.. I'd be awfully lucky to get him to go again -even at night.. he'd need a slither of Viagra for it to be hard enough.. 

So thankful I live in the day of that little blue pill.. it has saved us numerous times when I was ANTSY for some action.. his attitude is ...if he can get it up.. he wants to use it...the man does love sex...so I can't really complain...

My drive has calmed since... now we're about even..

Kinda envy the women who have their men ready to roll this quickly....

In his youth.. he could do it like a half hour later - for those times he slipped before me...This would be Me >> .. telling him I needed that, damn it! that he was going to do that again...

Today... that's just not going to happen.. 

I gotta say though...he's amazing at holding out... this helps so he doesn't need to get a new erection right away..


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## MrsHolland (Jun 18, 2016)

He is 55, refractory can be as quick as 10 mins. We don't often go a second round though as the first is usually enough to knock us both out.


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## TheTruthHurts (Oct 1, 2015)

Hmmmm don't know. W is one and done. I'm 54 so I can go a l o o o o g time now, but I gauge things and pop when it makes sense for her. No point in just chopping wood for 30 minutes (I sometimes wonder if young guys think all women want that based on porn). 

I do prefer to go a bit longer than W. 

But I suspect it's very short refractory period and if she was up for it I'm sure I could accommodate it. 

Btw been working out a few times a week hard with a personal trainer lifting snd also do cardio other days so that probably helps. Certainly helps with T levels.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## Lurkster (Feb 8, 2016)

SimplyAmorous said:


> Wish this was the case for my husband ... not that we have tried RIGHT AFTER he blows.... we generally climax together like 95% of the time.. we're blissfully satisfied afterwards...


Hey....seems to me you two have figured it out.
And more than once due to changes aand all.

Good for you both!!

Lurkster


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## Spicy (Jun 18, 2016)

I don't know the answer to this question! I need to find out ASAP.

I am happy to make this sacrifice in the name of research!:grin2:


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## larry.gray (Feb 21, 2011)

wantshelp said:


> From the Internet...
> 
> According to some studies, 18-year-old males have a refractory period of about 15 minutes, while those in their 70s take about 20 hours, with the average for all men being about a half-hour. Although rarer, some males exhibit no refractory period or a refractory period lasting less than 10 seconds.
> 
> Anybody here have a 10 second refractory period? :grin2:


Until about 35 I was a zero about 75% of the time. I found stimulation unpleasant for about a minute, but there was no loss of stiffness. For the first several rounds my orgasm to orgasm time was about 15 minutes. I was capable of going until wife said "enough" and we'd quit.

Nowadays it's only a few minutes most of the time, but it isn't a rock right after. More than enough to penetrate again but not at peak stiffness. A new orgasm takes about 1/2 hour.


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## alexm (Nov 29, 2008)

EunuchMonk said:


> You forgot to say how long it was....


That wasn't in the question and is nobody's business and nobody cares.

I am unsure as to why you're singling me out in this, when other people are saying more or less similar things in response to this question.

If you read my response as bragging, that was not my intention. Nobody here knows me, this isn't my real name (or picture! I don't even own a dog!) and I could care less what anybody thinks about these things, other than my wife. If my refractory period was 7 days and I had a 2" penis, I'd say so, in response to the question. Actually, I wouldn't mention my penis, as it has nothing to do with the question.

Thanks for contributing, though!


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## EunuchMonk (Jan 3, 2016)

alexm said:


> That wasn't in the question and is nobody's business and nobody cares.


So why write it?



> I am unsure as to why you're singling me out in this, when other people are saying more or less similar things in response to this question.


Singling you out? WTF!



> If you read my response as bragging, that was not my intention. Nobody here knows me, this isn't my real name (or picture! I don't even own a dog!) and I could care less what anybody thinks about these things, other than my wife. If my refractory period was 7 days and I had a 2" penis, I'd say so, in response to the question. Actually, I wouldn't mention my penis, as it has nothing to do with the question.
> 
> Thanks for contributing, though!


TFW you are triggered.

Thanks for writing that long response though!


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## alexm (Nov 29, 2008)

EunuchMonk said:


> So why write it?
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I'm very confused. I said nothing that several other people didn't already say in their responses, but somehow you made it sound as though you think I was bragging, and the only thing missing was how big (or small, you'll never know!) my penis is - am I correct?

And triggered by what?

I've so far liked and enjoyed reading many of your comments on TAM, so whatever caused you to reply to my response the way you did came out of left field for me, this one included.


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## Seppuku (Sep 22, 2010)

It depends on the situation and my level of arousal. On average I would say 10-15 minutes but can be much, much shorter

I just turned 38.

Sent from my LG-H810 using Tapatalk


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## As'laDain (Nov 27, 2011)

30 years old here. I don't really have a refractory period unless I am just physically exausted. I usually have about four orgasms, and I stay hard.

For me, the only thing that takes time after an orgasm is building up to another orgasm. The first one is in like 20 seconds, second in a few minutes, third after another ten minutes or so, fourth after about fifteen. Usually my wife is the one to tap out first, but sometimes she out lasts me. 

When she drinks tequila, she is insatiable! At a certain point, I just stay hard and have an orgasm about every fifteen minutes or so.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Holdingontoit (Mar 7, 2012)

No idea. Never had a round 2 in my life. So if you are female and annoyed that you have to wait so long between rounds, realize it could be much worse. You could be with a guy who does not understand how to keep the session going so that there is a round 2. And if you are a guy who is concerned how long it takes you to get ready for round 2, thank your lucky stars that you have a partner who is interested in keeping the session going so you can have a round 2.


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## jarhed (Nov 11, 2012)

I can be back in the saddle in 20-25 minutes. I ask all the time for 2fers, cuz if we lie there for a bit I get hard again- but she usually pushes me away. Grrrrr


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## DustyDog (Jul 12, 2016)

EllisRedding said:


> Sounds like the men of TAM should do one big Erection experiment tonight. Skype anyone??? :grin2:


A test? Ugh. The last test I took, I studied and studied and studied for it and STILL flunked that damned urine test.


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## CantBelieveThis (Feb 25, 2014)

Prolactin is the main hormone that controls refractory period, and to some extent as well, circulating levels of free testosterone (unbound) and estradiol in males. As for me I can have a couple but usually the first is the best...40yo and on testosterone treatment, even w optimal levels I usually have no desire to doing it more than 2 or 3 times a day , seems plenty enough for us.....no need for more and not that much free time anyways.

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