# Have you read "Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay"



## smbunhappy (Jun 9, 2014)

Did it help or hinder your decision making process?


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

I have, several years ago and according to the book, I should have packed up and left.

But I didn't. Instead to took a long hard look at myself and saw how my own behavior contributed to his behavior. I changed my behavior. It took time but I learned to be more open and honest about what I wanted and needed from my husband. I also learned to recognize and encourage his attempts to be the kind of husband and man I wanted. I also had to do my level best to meet his needs.

Once I had been doing the above, I insisted he also start doing the above. I gave that time to be realized. When the time was up, I was ready to leave knowing I had done everything possible to make it work. It wasn't until I announced to him that I was through trying, that he finally got the picture that his half assed effort wasn't enough and would never be enough, and he started putting full effort into it.

We are now 8 months into full out effort and things are going very well.

We've been married almost 30 years. Making a marriage work is not for the faint of heart. It is difficult to know whether to end it or try. Once you have tried everything, you can walk with a clear conscience. Until then, you're chasing rainbows.


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## Jetranger (May 31, 2013)

It helped. I was quite a long way in before I reached a 'YES' question, but some of the other scenarios and situations it presented along the way were thought-provoking too.


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## highwood (Jan 12, 2012)

I just posted in my thread from earlier today that I know I contribute alot to my own unhappiness. I feel like I am in a vicious cycle becuase I am not happy withmyself thus I think I am taking it out on him but then at times I think if he was gone I would be happier and more focused. Grass is greener on the other side kind of thing...

I read that book and I related to what she was saying about how you spend most of your thought process daily thinking about should I stay or leave..I so can relate to that. Sometimes I think I should put that energy toward my courses I am taking or working out or gardening I would be more productive


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