# Wife says she is frustrated



## shawnmc (Apr 4, 2011)

We have been married for 7 years. I first noticed she would not say I love you too about 3 weeks ago.We have been having financial problems that she blames completely on me.I can honestly say a lot of it is my fault.I should have hired some one out side the family instead letting her help.I just didn't want to hurt her feelings. Now After I have given up on our small company and have taken a few good job offers she flipped out and started screaming and telling me why now? why not a couple of years ago before I was this angry and about to divorce you? I try to talk to her but she says she doesn't want to talk about it around the kids or not right now. After some arguing and getting "b" at I ask her if she still loves me.She does not say yes, or no. She just says she is frustrated. I am devastated!!! I am not making excuses but we lost our first son in 06' and I have had a hard time dealing with it. I would come home from work and just want to drink untill I passed out.We had another son in 09 that looks like his twin and it has been so hard. Every time I look at him I am so happy and so sad at the same time.I know I have not been a very good husband and should have payed more attention to my wife but now I wonder if it is to late! I don't know what to do.All I want to do is make her happy again. Some one please help! I don't want to loose her.I can't sleep, I can't seem to eat very much.She is the love of my life.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

You cant make your wife happy, she has to make her self happy... happy with her own life and her own dicisions. So stop and make your self happy, show your wife a confident and successful man that will get throught this crap and she is more then welcome to come along. 
The last thing you want is your spouse believing you have lost control of the ship. so go easy on the booze and take control of your self.
I have to believe once she sees you back in control and taking actions not words in bettering your self she will be happy.
She will be happy that the man she married is back and in control and she will soon feel the security you gave her so many years ago.

I may be wrong here but she may be frustrated over the fact that her man is no longer the captain of the ship. Maybe the direction, guildence, and security she once felt is gone and she is wondering were that confident strong man is.

So stop asking whats wrong and start telling her whats right and that you will fix it, not for her but for your self and if she want to come along for the ride you can only promise her a positive change in *your * life and a healther marraige.

You seem so worried about her you may have lost your self.


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## MrK (Sep 2, 2010)

I hate to always be so pessimistic, but wives don't fall back in love with husbands. I've yet to see it happen with anyone on this or any other site I've been on. No way it's happening in my marriage. They fell out of love for a reason, and no matter how much you change, that other you is always there. 

It'll never get back to the way it was. You're different, she's different, your relationship is different. Keep working on yourself and figure out a new relationship with your wife that doesn't involve the same kind of love. That's gone. You need to work on something else.


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## shawnmc (Apr 4, 2011)

well, I talked to one of her friends and a relative. She told them that she is just very very upset because of our financial situation and that it is all my fault. I will not argue with her no matter what at the moment as that would just make things worse.She still will not talk to me about it so I will give her some time to cool off and try and do a few little things here and there to let her know I love her. On a good note, I got 2 job offers today that either one will help us get out of debt in a year or less and I have another interview Thursday for a job that should pay even more. I went ahead and accepted one offer on a trial basis and have started learning there procedures. If they are everything they say they are I will be able to negotiate my pay in a week or 2.


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