# Help me out here, ladies



## Searching For... (Jun 25, 2011)

My wife and I have been married 22 years. We both were married before (to other mates). My wife brought three children with her, and her and I had 1 together. I have worked my ass off to support my family and have been a faithful partner. My wife on the other hand has had, and been caught by me having relations with other men. The first time was about 17 years ago, and the latest was discovered about 2 months ago. She lies about it when confronted, which I can understand the knee jerk reaction to cover it up, but even when I discovered sexual text messages on her phone, she still tried to play it off and at that point told me she doesn't want to be married anymore and has felt that way along time. I will give more details if someone can help me work through this trying time. I love my wife, but my head is telling me to let go.


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## akcroy (Dec 23, 2010)

I'm a guy, but I don't think you need a lady to tell you what to do - anybody will tell you the same thing - that you should leave. Your wife seems to be a cold-blooded cheat. I'd also advise you to sue her for causing undue emotional hardship - that'd teach her, at least a bit.


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## Searching For... (Jun 25, 2011)

I don't want to teach her anything. Even I can't believe how much restraint I have had dealing with it. To me there is an underlying reason. My wife is Bi-Polar and is now dealing with the change along with unemployment. There are so many things that are playing a role in this. It's a mess. I just don't want to bale on a marriage I have felt comfortable in, for the most part. I just need to know if there are any women who have been in this position, who have recovered and were able to put concrete on their marriages. What are the odds of recovery? I don't want to give up, if there is still hope.


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

My wife has Bi-Polar but thankfully, it has never manifested itself as promiscuousness. I understand that is rather common with the disorder. I can honestly say I've never known anyone married to a Bi-Polar patient who described their situation as "comfortable". For me, it's anything but comfortable. I can deal with it and I can maybe even thrive in it but I have to always watch to avoid triggers. Her mood changes 10-15 times a day, often for no apparent reason and she can go from peaceful to downright hostile in a nanosecond.


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## confusedtexan (Jul 9, 2011)

Hi. I wish I had answers for you. I have the same problem with my husband and I found out recently it is a-lot worse than I ever imagined. He is bipolar as well and he has cheated on me before but we found out he was bipolar and got him treatment and for 3 years our marriage was great. We had major changes in our lives due to job loss and a move and he stopped taking his meds and he cheated again not with one person either. I have been married 8 years we have 2 kids now he wants to have another baby. I am so depressed. I don't even feel like I know who is he is sometimes. He says he does not want to lose me and it will never happen again. He's in therapy and taking his meds actually I give him his meds. It is so difficult to stay but at the same time so difficult to leave because there are so many good things about our realtionship at the same time. I can't advise you on what to do because I don't know what to do either. I hope things get better for you and whatever happens in your relationship you are happy.


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