# Update on: my husband left me 4 months pregnant



## addie (Apr 19, 2010)

well i am moving to another state on friday and my husband is now going to come too. he says he is gonna go cause his nanny is sick, but she is not really that sick. he also says it is just for a short visit and that he plans to come back out here. but he is taking all his belongings with him. does this sound like he is changing his mind? i still dont plan on being in same place as him when my son is born but it is good to know that he is going home to where he has more support from family(which he has yet to talk to his family about any of it). its refreshing that he is pulling away from the OW out here who i still believe he has been emotionally involved with(not physically). as much as i want our marriage to work and as much as i love him. i cant just give him a big welcome back if he decides he wants to come home. he has hurt me in all this and its gonna take time to heal from it. we really need to do alot of talking and probably find a way to reconnect as the couple we used to be before all this drama happened. am i being hopeful to think he is changing his mind or is really possible he is having a change of heart here?


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## addie (Apr 19, 2010)

well things seem to be going down hill now again. he is so indecisive. i am so confused. he said he is going to leave his truck her in virginia and just go to louisiana for a short visit and he is gonna fly back out here. i seem to be getting my hopes up adn broken down over and over. i know i am going to tennessee until my son is born but it is still heart breaking for him to stay here in virginia. i feel like this is the end of it all. i dont know what to do. how do you walk away from someone you love as much as i love him. he keeps saying how hard it is for him to leave us but why leave if it is that hard? its not like our marriage has been full of misery. we have had our issues and we have talked about our issues now and both of us understand we have these issues but yet he still insists on staying away from my daughter and me. it is really heart breaking but i know if i just give up and let it be that i would nto be able to handle it right now. i have to have hope in order to sustain some sort of healthy pregnancy. i feel like god is working with me somedays and against me others. i feel like god made his cousin call him one nght and tell him his nanny was sick, because god knows his only weakness is his mom and his nanny. i am asking everyone for prayers. we need all we can get. we are just a young couple(25 yr olds) trying to make it. i pray every night for god to take the pain and hurt from his heart(that i seem to have caused) and that god give me all the stregnth to forgive him for everything that has happened since he left me. and of course that god fill my baby girl with joy and my soon to be born son all the health.


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## cantletgo (Mar 22, 2010)

I know all too well the feelings of false hope that things will change. It's awful. My H is moving out soon, and I have 2 kids. I know what you are going through. All I can say is that if you honestly want to keep working at this marriage, then stay in touch with him, try to keep a level head, and concentrate on your children. That's what I have to do until my H decides to man up. I'm here if you need me.


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## addie (Apr 19, 2010)

cantletgo said:


> I know all too well the feelings of false hope that things will change. It's awful. My H is moving out soon, and I have 2 kids. I know what you are going through. All I can say is that if you honestly want to keep working at this marriage, then stay in touch with him, try to keep a level head, and concentrate on your children. That's what I have to do until my H decides to man up. I'm here if you need me.


i am trying with all i have to give him the space he needs but also keep in touch with him enough for him to know what he has at home. i would never push him away from our daughter and i pray everyday he will be there fro the birth of our son. but right now i am trying to hand it all over to god, better myself and my own life, and pray everynight that he will be able to remove the bricks and hate from his heart before its to late. im really trying


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## cantletgo (Mar 22, 2010)

That's all you can do hun. I am constantly reminded of that movie "Sleepless in Seattle", when he is talking to the radio host waking up every morning, trying to remember to breathe, and the hope that one day he'll wake and won't have to remind himself. Corny, I know. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other and remember, this too shall pass. I have to keep reminding myself of that as well. It's hard, but we will make it through this.


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Ask him to go to Help for Men, Mentor for Men, Men's Groups, Relationship Advice, Life Coach and read up on stuff there. It may change his opinion on what a marriage is supposed to be for a man his age.


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