# seperated..confused..want her back



## Draven (Nov 30, 2009)

Well....my wife and I had seperated in the spring for about three weeks...something she initiated. I stayed at the trailer and her at the house with our three childre...each week we swapped. We got back together and entered into counselling...it has been going really well until our last visit. it seemed like it was a bashing session against me. after two weeks and visits to her brothers....she said she needed some space and said she wasn't sure if she loved me anymore...so here i am....now some background. we have been married for over 17 years. our children are 16, 14, 12. four months ago, i caught her in bed naked with my best friend...now trust is a funnny thing and the ability to trust is sometimes harder...they were sleeping...i left them and another friend very drunk, she said she went to bed because i left (because everyone was getting very drunk) andwhen i returned much later ((about 3 am) this is what i found...no actions...just sleeping....she the next day said nothing happened and so did he...just that since he was drunk, he went to bed rather than the couch where he began....there was a sleeping bag there....see what i mean about trust...so i did trust her and i still do....the next day after that incident i left for one night...she then cried, wailed and passed out from the tears because she said she loved me so much that she could not live without me and she would do anything for me just so i wouldn't go away....well here i am...she is gone because she left because she said she doesn't know if she loves me or not....i am no angel...i never slept withanyone or had an affair.....but i am very confused with how she has flipped flopped her own love....any advice...i really want her back in my arms and in my life....


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## Help239 (Oct 20, 2009)

Take it from me....she is not telling you the truth and this is just the beginning of the roller coaster ride. I have been on it for almost 2 months.

Try to be honest with yourself - it took me 7 weeks to wake up.

You're not going to want to hear this, but if what you say above is true, she has cheated on you. Why else would the couch have been unoccupied? What possible BELIEVABLE reason would your best friend have to sleep in YOUR bed?

Wake up. Better to do so sooner rather than later. That said, it took me almost 2 months so I would understand if you didn't either.


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## jessi (Feb 11, 2009)

I agree with Help, I've been living with the same thing, my husband said he was just helping a friend/employee with a difficult situation(her marriage problems) that was their excuse for all the contact. I found out a week ago it's a full fledged affair and they actually have a plan set to each leave their spouses and pursue a relationship......Hurts like hell, I'm trying to be honest with myself and accept that this is and has been more than I want to believe.. People are so cruel and dishonest, protect yourself and your children, this might be something you wouldn't be able to hang on to.....she is showing signs of wanting something different, good luck


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