# Hi, I'm TurnedTurtle



## TurnedTurtle (May 15, 2019)

Hi, I'm TurnedTurtle.

Married 26+ years, living together 30+ years, dating for 33+ years. We have one child, now 22 years old, about to graduate from college.

Over the last 19 months or so I've learned some new things about my spouse (and myself) that brought our marriage to the brink of divorce, and that sent me into depression. We are still together, I am climbing out of my hole, but reality is reality....


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Hi, @TurnedTurtle.

What have you learned? How can we help you?


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## TurnedTurtle (May 15, 2019)

Hi MattMatt,

Thanks for your response, but I didn't actually come seeking help. I posted here in the introduction forum because it is required before I could post elsewhere, and there was another thread where I thought I might be able to offer the OP some helpful insight.

As to what I have learned: (1) my spouse had a serious crush and became very close with another person (what I call an asymmetric emotional affair); (2) I am very much a co-dependent person; (3) my spouse is (very likely) an asexual (aka, "ace")...


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## Lostinthought61 (Nov 5, 2013)

Welcome TT, if you have uncovered that your spouse is in an emotional affair, is asexual and your kid is grew up, why would you want to stay in this marriage when clearly you have an opportunity to move and find better life for yourself (however you define that) you can't carry a marriage on your own and clearly they are doing nothing to help.


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