# I asked the love of my life to move out...he left yesterday



## figureitout (Feb 14, 2010)

We have been together 3 years. We have our ups and downs, like all couples. We were common law. I was previously married, he has never been, we both have kids....no issues there. I have had depression in my life ever since I was in my late teens. I was treated and saw a counsellor for many years. I am very aware of my 'triggers' and try hard to not fall back into that dark place again. 

My love has had issues over the years that he has clearly identified as problems for him (communication/depression/addiction issues) Some of these issues had begun to creep into our relationship. I think that he is depressed and in a rut (this has added to the other issues) 

My story...my previous marriage was one 15 years of loneliness. I became very independant as a result and learned to never lean on anyone, including my ex. We had an amicable split but I think that the walls of independance and loneliness has made it difficult for me to truly recognize happiness. I seem to always look to the negative and I really don't know that I actually know how to be happy. My common law love and I as a result, suffered.

I asked him to move out, despite the fact that we are deeply in love with each other, and truly do not want to be apart. I needed him to go work on his issues so that I could work on mine, alone. I realize that during this time apart we may drift apart and never reunite. I think that although it was the hardest thing that we have ever done, we need it to grow as people. If we have any chance to be together again, we have to take care of ourselves.

I am happy to say that he had taken a brave step and has an appointment to see a therapist this week. He has finally said out loud to me and others that he has issues to work on and he wants to feel better for himself.

I too have decided to go back to my counsellor for a 'maintenance' check up. I need to shake these long lost demons from my past and own up to some things.

I told him that there is no crystal ball that will tell us how this ends up. I hope that out of this very painful process that we can both heal and become better parents/partners/daughters/sons/sisters and brothers.

I may be on here from time to time as I think that I may need some support during my weaker moments.

Thanks for reading


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Good luck!

Are you still seeing him?


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