# An update or something like that.



## Agast84 (Dec 26, 2011)

Many things have happened since the last time I commented or posted. I got tired of my wife's odd behaviors as well as my temperament while dealing with her. I took about 2 weeks of little to no communication or physical contact(not that we have had much, especially hard not living in the same house.) I also let family take care of pickup and drop off. I lived my life and even blocked her on some of the sites we use to use.
Within those 2 weeks she seemed to miss me rather than take me for granted. We had fun together, not just with the kids.We did things as a family, which made me angry in some ways. I am having quite a reawakening to somethings. I am being cautious and observant, no need for any pep talks in on direction or another. That is all I have for now. I am still in therapy. There will be more to add, but I need sleep.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

You changed how you interact with her. It got her attention. Don't be angry about it. Change is sometimes needed.


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## Agast84 (Dec 26, 2011)

EleGirl said:


> You changed how you interact with her. It got her attention. Don't be angry about it. Change is sometimes needed.


I agree Elegirl, I was sleepy when I wrote the initial post and didn't clarify. That was about 2 months ago. We have slowly done more together. We have done beach trips for the day and so forth. She has stood up to her mother more (which I must say is a turn on now). She has started flirting with me as well, but she has always flirted with every one, but she started again. We are going to a concert this summer as well as taking a multi-day family trip. 
I am not reading too much into this stuff because I am sure she would do some of it with her male friends as well. 
As I have said, I am being VERY cautious regardless of what my family thinks(and if she thinks she is got me on a hook and going to string me along, she's got another thing coming. I love her, but I am not going back to loveless/100% sexless marriage.)
She is still saying contradictory things about the future, but I am noticing more "us/we" than last year. 
She also has mention her mom accused her of the same things I have ( I think her mom is crazy, because she still hasn't apologized for calling me horrible things for doing what she has done as well.) W's stories still seem inconsistent as far as some of the other men, so I am ever the skeptic and will continue to observe to make sure I am not crazy.


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## Shooboomafoo (Mar 30, 2011)

"I am not reading too much into this stuff because I am sure she would do some of it with her male friends as well. "

This bugs me. Its making me want to ask what your plan is at the moment. Are you just in a sort of holding pattern to see how things pan out?


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## Agast84 (Dec 26, 2011)

Shooboomafoo said:


> "I am not reading too much into this stuff because I am sure she would do some of it with her male friends as well. "
> 
> This bugs me. Its making me want to ask what your plan is at the moment. Are you just in a sort of holding pattern to see how things pan out?


I am sitting back and not stressing myself out. At times I have contemplated divorce, but I was really upset when this was going on. I know I, like many others on here have posted contradictory posts, but as my therapist says, "agast knows what is best for agast ." Her mother did a great job stirring up turmoil in our relationship, so I am trying to silence the paranoid voice as well as not view W through the blind eye of love and let her do whatever she wants. I've been in a holding pattern trying to emotionally equalize, I am nearest that point. 
In summary, I am trying to figure out where W's "truth" and her Fam's "truth" meet with mine.


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