# Wife With Dissolving Relationship



## MommaGizz (Dec 3, 2010)

My husband and I have been married for 2 1/2 years, though we have known each other for 7. I was 16 when we met and he was 20, and he was my first boyfriend/relationship. We had a troubling beginning. We parted ways after 9 months, then found each other years later where we fell back in love (the sappy puppy dog kind). Sex was frequent and we were inseperable. After 6 months, I got pregnant with our son. Sex during pregnancy eventually disappeared as my hormones were all out of whack (I also have thyroid issues which probably exascerbated this issue). There were many times where I would want it from him, but I was very put off because he became very emotionally distant from me. I would also wake up in the middle of the night to find him looking at porn. Our son was born and he took a job where he had to be out of town the majority of the time. When my son was 8 months old, he left this job to be at home with us. He has always had a big sex drive, but I have felt emotionally detached from him since I was pregnant. He says he loves me very much, and he wants sex all the time, but I don't feel a physical connection to him at all. 

Recently a few months back he left for a business trip, and in my depression I checked his social networking and found some very inappropriate messages to a MUCH older woman, someone he had a sexual past with. With more digging, I discovered that these types of inappropriate relationships have been going on since the beginning of our second go-a-round. We went to a Christian counselor, but he soon found excuses as to why we shouldn't go. 

We are very outwardly affectionate to each other, and say I Love You 15 million times a day, but I can't seem to get over my mistrust and the hurt from this. Now I find myself questioning everything I know about us. I find myself wondering about whether I made the right choice to marry him. Our marriage is sliding through my fingers, and it's killing me. I really do love him, I just miss the closeness. I want to have sex with him, but I can't stand the thought of being physical with someone who can't open up to me (if that makes sense??). It just feels like now we are staying together for our son.... Can anybody relate to this, or are my hormones just really that screwed up??


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