# I finally got my sex life to improve!!



## Shake-N-Bake (Jul 10, 2012)

Whether this is temporary or permanent, I don't know. Anyways, my wife has always been LD. I am her first and only lover. She has blamed her LD on being mad at me, to being confused, to not being happy and all that mess. Well, I worked very hard for the past few months or so on spending more time with her, and basically listening and showing her main 2 love languages (of the 5 love languages) and it has worked like a charm. Recently she has told me that she thinks I am very sexy, and that I am the hottest out of all her friends husbands, and that her girls just won't admit it. A woman's emotions sure do dictate who and what is sexy more than physical appearance!  She has noticed a huge boost in my confidence (lost weight, working out, more energy, jelqing aka. penis exercises that increase size and erection quality, no joke) She has even lately told me that she loves spending time with me and is much happier. We have figured out the emotional aspects of our relationships that have limited intimacy. She is a lot more touchy, and looks at me with deep love once again! She hates her job, so when she didn't feel comfortable to come home, she literally felt like she had NOTHING. Just glad to see most of this has changed.

Anyways,finally she admitted that yes, she is LD. All of the other excuses that she made, I have fixed, so she had nothing else to blame it on. Just had to face the music. She tried getting off BC and that seemed to help some. We went on vacation, and that eased her stress load. That seemed to help. She is having blood work looked at to see if that tells us anything about hormone regulation.

When we got back we had a deep conversation on why she may have a LD. Her parents sheltered her, and shoved into her head that sex is bad (at least before marriage, they are very overbearing) and she also has ugly duckling syndrome. I've always though she was beautiful, but now, more than ever. She felt awkward growing up and had bad skin. I told her that I knew I was a little insecure about things, and for once told her EXACTLY what they were, instead of trying to hide them anymore. I told her that I also constricted her sexuality without realizing it and that I was very sorry (things like getting mad directly at guys when they hit on her and not letting her handle herself, and basically sheltering her in some aspects). I told her that I wanted her to try new things with me, and become comfortable with herself and our sex life, so I came home with an egg vibrator and a medium-ish sized dildo. She didnt like the dill, but LOVES the egg. She told me that the though of being able to use the egg through her clothes turned her on. She also said that once penetration begins it is so much easier on her, (and boy is it a lot easier for me to get her motor running!!) Sometimes me massaging and touching her just made her not want to be touched anymore instead of turning her on. Afterall, for those that know of 5 love languages, she scored a 2 out of 12 on touch. It's just not her big language. So when it seems to be harder for me to get things going, the egg make a bridge from unexcited wife, to ready for action! She even admitted that she may like watching some soft-core porn. Sweet!! This whole honesty/confidence thing is working wonders for us.

So sex has increased from once or twice a month or less, to 10-12 times this past month alone!! Me being HD I thought I wanted sex 1-2times a day, but I am perfectly happy with 2-4 times a week. I can't explain the passion that is back in my life. Work is fun, I am smiling a lot more. Just thought I'd share my experiences with you guys. I am surprised that this turned around so quickly for us, but I have put nearly ALL of my free time and efforts into my marriage lately, and plan on keeping it that way. The rewards have been amazing. The best part is that I realized that I truly LOVE spending time with her. All the hours of fishing, guitar playing, and whatever other little hobbies that I have mean next to nothing without her love. I would often rather hang with her than fool with all of my man toys anymore. Thanks for listening crowd!! We'll see how consistent this becomes for us.


----------



## wiigirl (Jun 14, 2012)

Congrats!!! Happy for you! 









_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## keeper63 (Mar 22, 2012)

Be careful about making her the center of your universe, spending every waking moment, etc., you may swing the pendulum too far, and she may feel smothered. Don't give up on your hobbies, independence, etc., these are things that made you attractive to her in the first place.

Moderation, my friend...


----------



## Emerald (Aug 2, 2012)

Woo hoo! It is great to to hear a success story


----------



## Shake-N-Bake (Jul 10, 2012)

keeper63 said:


> Be careful about making her the center of your universe, spending every waking moment, etc., you may swing the pendulum too far, and she may feel smothered. Don't give up on your hobbies, independence, etc., these are things that made you attractive to her in the first place.
> 
> Moderation, my friend...


Agreed! But this is the type of behavior that got her in the first place. She actually is pretty needy, although she tries to make it seem as if she is not. I just had a lot of relationship healing to do, so I figured I'd jump start it with some attention and affection. I am going on a two day fishing trip with my buddy starting on Friday. She doesn't want me to go but hey...


----------



## Shake-N-Bake (Jul 10, 2012)

Emerald said:


> Woo hoo! It is great to to hear a success story


Hopefully we can make this last! We are still going to seek a therapist. I want to remove any deep seeded issues when we are on a good swing, just seems easier to fix small issues with the car motor when it is running rather than waiting for it to blow up.


----------

