# i love my husband, and he left



## cricket7 (Nov 12, 2008)

My husband has always been the jealous controlling type. I try not to let it bother me and try to keep the peace, but I still do things that I don't mean to do, but still make him mad.

He left about 2 weeks ago, and has been back twice for meaningless sex- I guess on his behalf. 

In ways I feel stupid, to let someone treat me in a manner that I have let him treat me. I have never cheated or even considered doing so, but he has always acted like it is just waiting to happen. 

I love my husband. And he left. I want him to change, to not think I am a horrible person, but he wont even go to counseling. 

He sent me divorce papers and keeps texting me to sign them and just get this over with.. but I can't. I love him. I want him to come back. 

I don't want things the way they were, but I still want him, but I can't make him see that. 

I don't know what to do.


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## voivod (Aug 7, 2008)

cricket7 said:


> My husband has always been the jealous controlling type. I try not to let it bother me and try to keep the peace, but I still do things that I don't mean to do, but still make him mad.
> 
> He left about 2 weeks ago, and has been back twice for meaningless sex- I guess on his behalf.
> 
> ...


to your knowledge, has HE ever cheated? not on you, but maybe on a previous relationship? my counselor called freakin out about your spouse cheating when he actually did is called "projecting."

controlling and jealous are a combination that come together with that or self-esteem problems. he may not think he "deserves" you. romantic, i suppose, but also potentially very destructive.

talk with him, find out what's going on as far as those things are concerned. a little individual counseling can go a long way towards that.


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## magicsunset08 (Oct 30, 2008)

If he treats you bad and has left and does not want to work it out, what is left? It cannot be one-sided. You should not give him sex--no matter what. That will only complicate things.He has some self esteem issues. Tell him you love him and would not do anything to hurt him, but don't put up with that stuff. Life is too short.


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## draconis (Oct 3, 2007)

voivod said:


> to your knowledge, has HE ever cheated? not on you, but maybe on a previous relationship? my counselor called freakin out about your spouse cheating when he actually did is called "projecting."
> 
> controlling and jealous are a combination that come together with that or self-esteem problems. he may not think he "deserves" you. romantic, i suppose, but also potentially very destructive.
> 
> talk with him, find out what's going on as far as those things are concerned. a little individual counseling can go a long way towards that.



:iagree:

draconis


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## NikiVicious (Oct 2, 2008)

You deserve to be treated with love. He isnt treating you with love. Why do you want him back? He is unwilling to change his actions. If it is going to work, he will have to change certain paterns of behavior. 


PS: You left a comment on my profile calling me a "Mean person" I was wondering why you would say that. Please explain.


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