# Physical anxiety



## joannacroc (Dec 17, 2014)

Horrible chest pains and nausea making it hard to deal physically with dealing with being under the same roof as my husband until we can hash out custody agreement for our son for during the separation. Right now he has agreed I can take our son on a planned trip to see my family over the holidays without him. Once he finds a place to live in January I have asked him to move out. He is planning on spending the holidays with one of the women he's been cheating on me with (but denies that too). I keep telling myself I only have to stick it out for a few more days, but I can't seem to sleep. Frustrated since he cheated on me (I have proof) and he is denying everything and acting angry at me for suggesting he's done such a thing. Mostly I'm scared because he followed me to a work event we had planned in attending together a few weeks ago which I asked him not to join me at and since I didn't feel safe getting out of the car alone. How did this happen? Anyone else suffering from anxiety pains and found a great way to deal with them? What's your secret?


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## fertileground (Sep 22, 2012)

Hi,
I am sorry you are going through this. It is super hard.When I was first going through this, I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, was quite shaky. One day, even drove through a stop sign and didn't realize it until I had gone through the intersection- that really scared me. 
I went on medication for a while, still go to therapy, and got tons of support from my family and friends. Other people exercise a lot. Unfortunately, you just have to get through this. I wish there was a magic potion, but I haven't found it. Best advice I can give to you is for you to talk to your doctor and a therapist. Good luck, stay strong!


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## Mr.Fisty (Nov 4, 2014)

You should go see a doctor to help manage your anxiety until you can learn to manage it on your own,. Seek a therapist to help cope with the stress. You have to start managing your life, and let go of the things you can't control. Once you gain acceptance of that fact, your mind can start focusing on a game plan to regain some control of your life. You seem off-balanced, and your thoughts and emotions are all over the place. You have to gain confidence in yourself, and believe that the actions you are taking is the correct ones. If you are not sure, seek advice. 

There is some things that you can do right now. Go full tilt into the divorce. Part of you is conflicted with this idea, but once you set course, and put energy into that action, it releases you from inaction. Believe that this is correct. Believe that you deserve a loyal spouse, and that no matter what happens, you will be fine.

Start working out, start eating healthier, and believe that you do have good qualities that someone will cherish. Accept your weaknesses, and work on them. The more self-improvement you make, the more confidence will be gained by you. Start new hobbies and try new things, you may discover more about yourself.

Also, you have to cut contact with him, unless it deals with your son. Whenever your around him, seek a cool, calm, collective persona. Don't show any emotions and show how vulnerable you are. You have to detach from him. Attachments leads to suffering, as well as fulfillment and joy. Your attachment to him is making you suffer. You have to physically and emotionally cut him away. See him as an ex, no longer as your husband. Keep that thought in your mind. Make it a mantra. The truth is, you are no longer in a relationship. Relationship requires reciprocity, and currently there is none. You have to change your perception to the person that he is at the moment. Inside of your mind, you have to discard the past to accept the current him.


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## Thundarr (Jul 4, 2012)

joannacroc said:


> Horrible chest pains and nausea making it hard to deal physically with dealing with being under the same roof as my husband until we can hash out custody agreement for our son for during the separation. Right now he has agreed I can take our son on a planned trip to see my family over the holidays without him. Once he finds a place to live in January I have asked him to move out. He is planning on spending the holidays with one of the women he's been cheating on me with (but denies that too). I keep telling myself I only have to stick it out for a few more days, but I can't seem to sleep. Frustrated since he cheated on me (I have proof) and he is denying everything and acting angry at me for suggesting he's done such a thing. Mostly I'm scared because he followed me to a work event we had planned in attending together a few weeks ago which I asked him not to join me at and since I didn't feel safe getting out of the car alone. How did this happen? Anyone else suffering from anxiety pains and found a great way to deal with them? What's your secret?


A short term fix is medicine but that's not the long term answer. 

When my wife was having panic attacks I went to and bought a package of books and tapes. It was kind of expensive back then ($500) but maybe it's not so high now.
Midwest Center for Stress & Anxiety - Solution for Stress and Anxiety | Overcome Anxiety | Overcome Stress | Midwest Center for Stress & Anxiety

But it helped my wife a lot and it worked for my boss's wife who was having anxiety and panic attacks. Honestly I read a lot of the material and it helped me even though I wasn't having uncontrollable anxiety attacks, we all get anxious and nervous sometimes.


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## ButtPunch (Sep 17, 2014)

I had to get meds. Only needed them a few months. I didn't get addicted and quit before the prescription was even up. See a doctor and tell him what's up.


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## IIJokerII (Apr 7, 2014)

Remove yourself from the environment as much as practical, schedule some away time for a sleep over at a friends house or family's house. Forget about him admitting any wrongdoing, you know the truth, and that's all that you need, his denial and lying shows what a coward he is.


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