# Just found the NC letter I wrote to ex's AP but didn't send



## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

Wow, just decided to clear out an old email account I had setup when my ex was in the midst of her affair, right on dday. Found a draft email I had stayed up all night writing to the POS OM.

That was before I came to TAM, was distraught and had no idea what was happening. It was a very logical letter, but SOOO weak, was basically pleading to the other guy to reconsider continuing their affair. At the time I didn't think he knew she was married, and I'd found his FB profile, on it he was bragging about how important family is and how his daughter is his world - so my letter played on that. However it wasn't until some time later I realized that the photos she had sent him she was not only wearing her wedding ring, but had put it on specifically for him (since for several months prior she had stopped wearing it complaining that her hands were alwaus swollen from her work).

The night/morning I wrote it I was just about to send it when she burst into my (the spare) bedroom and asked me to not send it.

Looking back I can't believe how weak and desperate I was totally afraid to offend her and push her away, pretty much seeking his approval to end it, what a fcking doormat I was. I'm kinda glad I didn't send it after all though, realizing now the immature and selfish girl my ex was, I'm glad I wasn't able to salvage that relationship (I couldn't have admitted this without complete shame for thinking this a year ago).


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## SRN (Mar 20, 2012)

Lon said:


> Looking back I can't believe how weak and desperate I was totally afraid to offend her and push her away, pretty much seeking his approval to end it, what a fcking doormat I was. I'm kinda glad I didn't send it after all though, realizing now the immature and selfish girl my ex was, I'm glad I wasn't able to salvage that relationship (I couldn't have admitted this without complete shame for thinking this a year ago).


Glad you're getting to that point. I feel like I'm on my way there too.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Lon said:


> Looking back I can't believe how weak and desperate I was totally afraid to offend her and push her away, pretty much seeking his approval to end it, what a fcking doormat I was.


Hindisght is always 20/20.

Aren't you so glad you didn't send the letter though?


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