# Depression?



## Trying2getitRIGHT (Mar 7, 2017)

My wife has stated many times she is depressed. She is now getting cold towards me, and seems to want very little to do with me. She acts put out to give a hug or kiss, like its irritating her. She complains how tired she is constantly. She has gained a lot of weight, and does not really take much care of herself. So i doubt shes cheating. But she acts like she wants nothing to do with me. Shes a stay at home mom and says shes drained. Is this normal for depression?


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## marriageontherocks2 (Oct 4, 2017)

Sounds like depression, have her see a doctor and therapist. If she refuses to get help, let her know that you'll support her and deal with her lows as long as she's seeking help, but if she won't do anything about it you don't feel obligated to just be her whipping post and live in a marriage devoid of all affection and intimacy.

Depression is a beast, and for many it's a terminal illness. It takes a lot of hard work to deal with it and get better. You never really go into remission, but you can cope with it and learn how to deal with the disease without spiraling into the depths of depression and making yourself and everyone around you miserable.


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## Ynot (Aug 26, 2014)

Yes, it sounds very much like depression. To beat it, you need to discover the source of it. It could be hormonal. it could be dietary, it could be environmental or situational. Way too many people choose to treat the symptoms with drugs rather than find the cause and root it out. Good luck.


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## Rick Blaine (Mar 27, 2017)

Start by calling you health care provider. They will have in place therapists who can help diagnose your wife's depression. 

My daughter went through a diagnosis as well as therapy. She took classes, and I joined in on some of them. She eventually was put on medication. She struggles with depression, but she has developed coping skills. I feel very bad for her as she has many dark nights in her own personal hell. But she has more good days then bad and she is persevering.

As a parent I have been as proactive as possible. I never enable her. But I always show her love and concern. Do this with your wife. Call your doctor immediately and get her help. But she has to be willing to help herself.


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## nealstory (Mar 3, 2018)

Hi there, I think she is in depression and at this point in time she need your presence and you need to take care of her otherwise the condition can get worse in future. You need to find out the main problem and try to solve it. You can also take the help of professionals who can help to cure depression. I have heard good reviews about martine-voyance who are expert in curing depression.


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## Red Sonja (Sep 8, 2012)

Tired all the time and weight gain can also be symptoms of inadequate thyroid hormone levels, among other things. A complete blood test panel by a physician is good place to start in order to rule out a medical cause.


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## EndoftheLine (Jan 11, 2018)

I think I am in the same boat. My wife was a very cheery person before marriage. She used to get upset if she thought someone had slighted her or her family. Before marriage, she was an accomplished doctor back home but since coming to USA, she hasn’t been able to practice or even work. I never put any restrictions on her working. We have had a kid so last few years she has dedicated her life to our kid. For a while now, she is upset almost daily, at me or my family or our kid. She has become this person that I hardly recognize. She has gained at least 30 pounds. Her daily routine is basically somehow get through the day until our daughter has gone to bed. After that, she is stuck on one side of bed with food and tv. Sometimes she insists on me joining her to watch something. Otherwise she just does her own thing and goes to sleep after few hours. If we have any kind of free time, she spends it shopping. Basically we have no conversations outside of taking care of our daughter together. I have tried to engage her in serious discussions few times that we need to do something to fix this. Some counseling or some volunteer work to start so she can feel better about herself. There are days she is super into everything and she is planning future steps such as how to lose weight, how to get back in the field, things to do for our child. I also get excited but after few days, it is right back to her just getting through the day somehow. Physically we have not been intimate in a long time except once. We had an abortion couple of months back. I think that has made situation worse. She isn’t open to being intimate anymore. I honestly think if she had not married me, she would be in better place. She probably still be working , have self esteem and be happy. I have thought about taking myself out of the equation but I think that will just further send her downhill. Besides I want to be happy with her and daughter. There are times when she smiles and laughs with me on my silly jokes that make me the happiest man but those moments are rare. I really want our marriage to work. I just don’t know where to start. She seems to have shut herself off to anything I am saying.


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