# what percentage of the population is asexual



## KendalMintcake (Nov 3, 2012)

What percentage of the population (do you reckon) is asexual as in they have no interest in sex. I'm beginning to think my wife is asexual . Once upon a time I said to her that I'm sure I never initiated that we'd never do it to which there was a pause followed by 'pprobably'. That really pissed me off its a bit like imagining a situation where one partner (lets just say the husband) was a non-working and believed that working was optional and then subjected the spouse to lack of income etc. Imagine that imagine if I just didn't want to work it would be unacceptable. Whatever I'm just wondering because google states that 1% of people are asexual and I'm just trying to wrap my head around the odds ! How the %&*) did this freakin happen !
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

I think you're confusing true asexuals (about 1% of the population, but potentially as high as 5% - stats are very limited on this) with low drive people or those who are in relationships with someone who does not sexually attract them.

Nearly 46 percent of premenopausal women experience low sexual desire at some time in their lives, and it is the most common form of female sexual dysfunction. About 31% of men have the same experience.

Your wife may only have responsive desire (RD), since you must initiate all the time.


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## Starstarfish (Apr 19, 2012)

There's also a difference between not intitating and never having sex.


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## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

I know you've been struggling with this for awhile. Questions I would have are 

1) Did your wife appear to have a higher libido with others prior to you or at the beginning of your relationship? 

2) Was there an event or series of events that turned her off to you that you can think of?


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## lovecat (Jul 31, 2015)

KendalMintcake said:


> What percentage of the population (do you reckon) is asexual as in they have no interest in sex. I'm beginning to think my wife is asexual . Once upon a time I said to her that I'm sure I never initiated that we'd never do it to which there was a pause followed by 'pprobably'. That really pissed me off its a bit like imagining a situation where one partner (lets just say the husband) was a non-working and believed that working was optional and then subjected the spouse to lack of income etc. Imagine that imagine if I just didn't want to work it would be unacceptable. Whatever I'm just wondering because google states that 1% of people are asexual and I'm just trying to wrap my head around the odds ! How the %&*) did this freakin happen !
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Just curious to how old you and your wife are?


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## dadstartingover (Oct 23, 2015)

KendalMintcake said:


> What percentage of the population (do you reckon) is asexual as in they have no interest in sex. I'm beginning to think my wife is asexual . Once upon a time I said to her that I'm sure I never initiated that we'd never do it to which there was a pause followed by 'pprobably'. That really pissed me off its a bit like imagining a situation where one partner (lets just say the husband) was a non-working and believed that working was optional and then subjected the spouse to lack of income etc. Imagine that imagine if I just didn't want to work it would be unacceptable. Whatever I'm just wondering because google states that 1% of people are asexual and I'm just trying to wrap my head around the odds ! How the %&*) did this freakin happen !
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Do you realize how many people have heard this... only to find out that their spouse is having an affair and does unspeakably kinky sexual things with the affair partner? 

We all really need to stop throwing around terms like "asexual" so much. It's ridiculous. You just aren't lighting her fire, amigo. No big deal... it happens. A lot. Stop thinking that simply being her husband gets you an instantly horny wife. It doesn't. Quite the opposite, actually. You're familiar and never going away. You're comfortable. None of those things equal desire. 

Dissecting Dead Bedrooms


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

It's a distinction without a difference.


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## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

dadstartingover.com said:


> Do you realize how many people have heard this... only to find out that their spouse is having an affair and does unspeakably kinky sexual things with the affair partner?
> 
> We all really need to stop throwing around terms like "asexual" so much. It's ridiculous. You just aren't lighting her fire, amigo. No big deal... it happens. A lot. Stop thinking that simply being her husband gets you an instantly horny wife. It doesn't. Quite the opposite, actually. You're familiar and never going away. You're comfortable. None of those things equal desire.
> 
> Dissecting Dead Bedrooms


If anyone happens to read some of KMC's earlier threads, you'll find out that he has the nice guy syndrome (engaging in covert contracts), had a weird exchange with his wife over the gift of a vibrator where he went passive/aggressive with her and had a thread where he professed an interest in wearing tights in public as a guy and his wife wondered if he was a homosexual deep down. A lot of that points more to someone who does not think highly of her H as a lover or as a person of value. JMHO, sorry to KMC if this comes across as offensive.


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## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

OP, I'm sorry to say this, but I think the problem is not that your wife is asexual but rather that she does not want to have sex with you. The two of you don't seem to have the healthiest marriage in general. I'm not sure either of you even _like _the other very much.


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## dadstartingover (Oct 23, 2015)

Plan 9 from OS said:


> If anyone happens to read some of KMC's earlier threads, you'll find out that he has the nice guy syndrome (engaging in covert contracts), had a weird exchange with his wife over the gift of a vibrator where he went passive/aggressive with her and had a thread where he professed an interest in wearing tights in public as a guy and his wife wondered if he was a homosexual deep down. A lot of that points more to someone who does not think highly of her H as a lover or as a person of value. JMHO, sorry to KMC if this comes across as offensive.


Okay, this puts things into perspective. 

KMC: You need a total restart, my friend.


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## KendalMintcake (Nov 3, 2012)

Yeah I think you are right. I guess if I was not attracted to my wife and thought she was a looser I'd be labeled asexual as well since I steer clear all the time (and probably have a fling on the side). Thinking about it from that perspective gotta feel bad for her being stuck with a pos for an H :/ I really should look in the mirror more ...
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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