# What do you want to REALLY tell your ex?



## lulubelle (Jun 28, 2012)

So the best way to act is to not react, nc, 180, ect. don't cry, beg, blubber, drink a bottle of wine and text them to f#ck off. but sometimes it's so hard not to, so tempting! this thread is for all the mean, nasty, immature, pathetic things you would love to tell them! 

so here's my list :lol:

you are a worthless piece of sh!t.

if you want to spend your life living in your mommy's basement, getting drunk with your looser single friends, go for it.

you're a selfish drunk.

you're a spinless coward and don't deserve me.

you sucked at oral.

my life is better without you.

you can go f#ck yourself, you f#cking stupid douche bag.


AHHHHH! i feel a little better already!


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## Orpheus (Jul 6, 2012)

lulubelle said:


> you sucked at oral.


Isn't that the point?


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

Every time you lied there were obvious physical signs.
You asked me how I knew when you were lying, because I was so accurate. I told you some of the ways I knew, but not all. And no, I never needed any electronic surveillance or a private detective, I got my information solely from your casual conversation and your body. If I had told you all of it, it wouldn't be so obvious to the next person to come along. Every time you lied, I went along, because I assumed that since you had been found out, and not confronted too much, you might take a hint and change your behavior. I never expected you to be so dumb as to really think I believed you. :-o Sorry, I can't stay married to someone who is so ridiculously out of touch with themselves and others that they don't even know when their lies have been thoroughly exposed, and think they've got away with something. Eventually too, it became too much of a burden to try to remember all the lies I was currently 'believing.' I guess to sum it up, hey, you're transparent. lol.


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## Orpheus (Jul 6, 2012)

something like this drives through my head about 80 million times a day...

10 Things I Hate About You. (poem) - YouTube


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

Count backwards from 60.


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## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

lulubelle said:


> you sucked at oral.


Ok...now that's just harsh...a really low blow!


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## Traggy (Jan 26, 2012)

Orpheus said:


> something like this drives through my head about 80 million times a day...
> 
> 10 Things I Hate About You. (poem) - YouTube



That poem is gut wrenching. Stop it!


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## unsure78 (Oct 17, 2011)

Well since you asked and im really pissed at him right now:
1) you have a small d!ck ( always wanted to say that but could never be that mean)
2) you were boring in bed, i asked you to spice it up and you gave me nothing
3) you are a selfish, immature, idiot, who cant manage money or anything else to save his life. oh and you cant even keep a f*cking job. 

You know what you did me a favor cheating on me and wanting a divorce, I am getting rid of having to take care of you like your mommy for the rest of my life. This allows me to go out and find a real man, and even if i end up being alone for the rest of my life its still better than having to walk on eggshells trying to not get you upset, while taking care of everything else. Enjoy your new life a$$hole- its what you asked for.


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## vi_bride04 (Mar 28, 2012)

Guess what. I'm awesome and you can't have me. I'm done with you. No there isn't anyone else. Go have fun having emotionally shallow relationships with your female co-workers for the rest of your life!!!!


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

The opposite of love is indifference.

Lulu, as much shade as you're throwing at your ex, it sounds like you still love him.

Let me duck and get out of this thread.


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## casemx (Feb 1, 2012)

Dear W,

You have know idea how unbelievably pissed I am that you walked out with out giving our marriage a chance. Sure, you agreed to go to MC but your mind was already made up. YOU GAVE US NO CHANCE FROM THE BEGINNING. Nothing but a separation would do. You say you tried to work on things. By "work on things" I assume you mean withdrawing emotionally, keeping a strangle hold on resentment, and having an EA with that looser oompa loompa. 
I really hope your divorced 40 something ****bag "friends" are proud of you for "being your own woman" and "living your own life", because nobody else is.


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## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

You know all those times you said you might as well be a single mom to me, or to our friends with me around, when I was gone all day at work an hour and a half away so you could live where you wanted, and do what you wanted? You've got your wish now babe.

I think of all the things that happened, and all the things that bothered me in my marriage, that frequently used comment is the one thing that I think I will have the hardest time not being bitter about. I think what hurt me most was when I told her how it made me feel, rather than recognizing that it was a very hurtful and disrespectful thing to say, she would try to justify it.

Now that we have been seperated and with the divorce eminent, she has ramped up the the rhetoric to anyone who will listen about how hard it is for her having to do everything by herself, which surprises me that she would feel that way since she might as well have been a single mom when we were married. The thing is, it's going to get a whole lot harder for her...she is still not working.


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

***** was the better man.
We hadn't sleep together and we really were just good friends.
You still could have had me, but you messed it up.
I hope you enjoyed the second chance you asked for and got, 100%.
Funny thing is, after you cheated on me again, within three months of asking for your second chance, he was right there waiting for me. It was nice to know that SOMEONE thought I was worth all that. 
Even though he had a brain hemorrhage, he's still way smarter than you.


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## burgh_mom (Jul 9, 2012)

Ah, thanks so much for this opportunity to vent...this should be fun! 

Dear H,

I'm sorry that you're lonely now. It's a shame that no one wants to be around you. Quite regretful that we now live apart, but this was your idea. Sure we had money problems, but mine are fixed now. Absolutely I miss you in my bed, but not enough to come back for more disrespect and lies. You will make it through the tears, just like I did. I have faith in you.

PS No, I will not sign your papers nor help you pay for our divorce. No it's not ok to date or text other women. Throwing the kids and I out of your home made you a loser. We are survivors!

Your beautiful W.


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## Kathrynthegreat (Apr 23, 2012)

Dear ex-husband,

You're a good man. 

Thank you for offering to support me until I was able to find a good job to get on my feet and support myself. 

Thank you for helping me work out a "dog support arrangement" to continue paying half the dogs' expenses after the divorce. They're your puppies too and I know you love them. They can't wait to come spend time with you at your new place. 

Thank you for being my best friend. 

Even though it didn't work out between us romantically and sexually, you are a human being of the highest caliber and I will always like and respect you. 


Am I doing this right?


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## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

Kathrynthegreat said:


> Dear ex-husband,
> 
> You're a good man.
> 
> ...


Yes, you are doing it just right.


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## Awakening2012 (Apr 13, 2012)

Dear H - 

I am disappointed that you loved me enough to marry me, and stay with me during the 2 years of the recurrence of my alcoholism (which you know I profoundly regret and am deeply remorseful for), but not enough to stay with me when I finally re-committed to my recovery, am getting better and needed you the most. I am disappointed that you left me and broke my heart. I am sad that the man who was so sure we were soul mates does not want to try harder to save the marriage, and cares so little for upholding our our marriage vows. I know that I hurt you, but am sick and tired of your abandonment rejection, distancing and indecision. I am doing my best to make amends, forgive myself, and carry on with building a happier, healthier life. But I miss you every day, and long for you to have a change of heart and give us another chance. I am scared that there will never be another man I could ever love as much as I have loved and still love you. 

Ugh...............


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

The brakes don't work.


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## Matt1720 (May 7, 2012)

Me so horny


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## ImStillHere (Apr 25, 2012)

casemx said:


> You say you tried to work on things. By "work on things" I assume you mean withdrawing emotionally, keeping a strangle hold on resentment, and having an EA with that *looser oompa loompa*.


:rofl: Hilarious!


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## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

Congratulations. You picked just the right person to support you when you were down, believe in your talents, understand your background, and give you chance after chance when you had multiple EAs and used my deepest fears and weaknesses of which I was most ashamed to keep me under your thumb. And now that you got to the point where you are sure you have other women wanting you, financial independence (thanks to the government and taxpayers), a free education (ditto) and others who will feel sorry for you, you can feel free to be even worse than the ill, abusive mother from whom you claimed to rescue me. You can break even the extra promises I asked you to make about never divorcing until we tried every last method of working things out -- by never even trying ONE method. Thank you for taking away my good memories by changing history to make everything bad. Thank you for making me feel tremendously guilty for picking you to be the father of my children. Thank you for leaving me as you found me -- not trusting that I would ever find someone who would truly love me for me, even when I screw up, or if I get sick or when the chips are down. Too bad there were 15 years of...whatever...between then and now. Thank you for not even allowing me to regret knowing you, because that would mean I wouldn't have my son, the only truly undeniable good thing from our relationship. 

A few words of advice: For your next 'true love(s),' 'best friend(s)', 'bride(s),' 'lifelong partner(s),' please do not say 'I love the best of you and the rest of you.' Do not play mushy songs about growing old together while you hold her as she cries, thinking you mean it. Just don't. Tell them all the truth. They are the flavor of the month. You will trade their feelings for the fleeting emotional attachment of someone who will sell you out when you hit a crisis, but you won't learn from it and will do it again. You will blame them for it, too. You do not believe in all the facets of love, only the fun part early on. You don't believe in honoring others' relationships, as you poached your current girlfriend from the man she was living with, supposedly a friend of yours. That you WILL get what you want, no matter what it takes. 

That you lie as easily as breathing. That you are a truly disordered human being and you scare me because you either don't realize it, or you do and deny it or don't care.

And in the end, you will walk away with your freedom, your health, your degree, half of my retirement, and other material goods. I will maybe qualify for food stamps, but probably not.

Congratulations.


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## jpr (Dec 14, 2011)

Nothing. I never want to talk to him ever again. :/
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## solitudeseeker (May 1, 2011)

You're a lousy father, and our daughter thinks you're an idiot.


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## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

unsure78 said:


> Well since you asked and im really pissed at him right now:
> 1) you have a small d!ck ( always wanted to say that but could never be that mean)
> 2) you were boring in bed, i asked you to spice it up and you gave me nothing
> 3) you are a selfish, immature, idiot, who cant manage money or anything else to save his life. oh and you cant even keep a f*cking job.
> ...


This is EXACTLY what I would say to my ex. Plus, sex with you was ****, you were always selfish and never cared if I got off. You ran off with our car, all the cash, haven't paid one bill and have ignored my communication and even your own parents ever since because you are a small, empty shell of a person who isn't worth the sh*t on the bottom of my shoes. You will always be unhappy. You will never be a real husband or have a family of your own. I dodged a bullet. Motherf***er.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

Runs like Dog said:


> The brakes don't work.


Rofl!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## lulubelle (Jun 28, 2012)

yay, so theraputic! yes i do still love him, unfortunately. but i'm angry and typing this here is a release, if i text him these things i just look crazy!


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## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

lay off the weed, yeah?


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

I did eat the last piece of pizza, and I'd do it again.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## toolforgrowth (Apr 24, 2012)

Honestly, at this point I would tell her this:

"I have no desire for competition for our daughter's affection. We both love her very much, and there is no reason why we can't amicably share her.

I truly hope you find happiness in your life. I have found a great deal of happiness, and I do not wish to rub it in your face. I'm enjoying my freedom, and I'm enjoying my new relationship. I hope you experience the same. If you are happy, then I am happy for you. 

Please stop playing games. You attempt to use our daughter as a means of controlling me, and to keep me under your thumb. I find it immature and unnecessary. And please stop coming around me dressed up in sexy clothes. It is comically transparent what you are trying to do and it only serves to make you look foolish. I no longer want you; please accept it gracefully.

I hope for our daughter's sake we can be civil, although I will never want to be friends with you. There is too much resentment over everything that's happened for me to ever trust you again.

And please, for your sake and for our child's, seek counseling."
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Rawrdonstein (Jun 14, 2012)

Simple: Thank you ever so much for putting me through hell,it made me a stronger, better person.


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## toolforgrowth (Apr 24, 2012)

Rawrdonstein said:


> Simple: Thank you ever so much for putting me through hell,it made me a stronger, better person.


There is a lot of truth to this statement. I feel like a different person as a result of my ex leaving and her affair. Rather, I'm the person I used to be before I became domesticated. Strong, fun, outgoing, and alive. 

I totally agree with you.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## boxhead201 (Jun 8, 2012)

I have to aim for indifference, but I still feel much anger towards my STBXW:

1. Thanks for disregarding my needs and feelings for the past 10-years.
2. Thanks for casting me aside while you took care of the children and your mother.
3. Thanks for creating a horrible living environment for me that caused me to move away from my children.
4. Thanks for checking out of the marriage because I would not take care of your mother.
5. Thanks for having an emotional affair with one of your mother's doctors.
6. Thanks for talking smack about me to all of your friends.
7. Thanks for using me and throwing me away like a piece of garbage.

Problem is: I told my STBXW this stuff, but I can no longer say it to her because it doesn't help. This is what I still feel though


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## UpnDown (May 4, 2012)

Nothing, because as much as I want to, I know in the end I will feel it meant jack squat to her anyways and I would probably be more irritated about that over venting.


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## Orpheus (Jul 6, 2012)

Goodnight Sweet Girl,

I wish we had been less broken.

I search for you under moonlight in a sea of endless sheets. And from our bed there is nothing to shelter me from the storm inside my head. As the days rage on even your memories want to divorce me. I no longer recall the tug of your lips upon mine; the way you would laugh with abandon; or the insecure preening before we'd leave for a date.

In its place is another woman. One who looks like you and answers to your name. But a woman I'll never know. 

Our marriage. Vessel lost. No survivors found.


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## kruppmart (May 10, 2012)

I haven't talk to her since D-Day(I wasn't able due to a CPO), and I never will. She always told me that I will have a hard time missing her ... I will proof the opposite. I give a sh*t what will happen to her ... I told her before I never look back in my live, and that is what is going to happen.

She recently informed a friend of ours that she has to put our dog to sleep ... I told him not to respond because I don't care (I care for the dog, but not for her feelings). I think ingnoring her and everything around her (family, her children) is the best for my healing.

I am trying to get my life to the best as it can get ... that will hurt her the most while she will going downhill.


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## lulubelle (Jun 28, 2012)

i love reading everyone's vents and seeing the different stages everybody is in this process. those who are indifferent or even at peace or grateful, i hope to be there someday. i'm ok right now with being angry and still loving him. just like the depressed desparate stage, i know this too will pass.


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## boxhead201 (Jun 8, 2012)

When will it pass? It is killing me !!!!


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## lulubelle (Jun 28, 2012)

boxhead201 said:


> When will it pass? It is killing me !!!!


i wish i knew! until that day comes, i am ok mentally stabbing the voodoo doll of him that is in my head!


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## MainStreetExile (Jun 26, 2012)

Dear L,

When all is said and done, I will never choose not to love you.


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## Lordhavok (Mar 14, 2012)

your a stupid inbred hillbilly wh#re
you've taken more from me than money or anything can replace
everytime I look at you I want to rip your throat out


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## jw1966 (Jun 26, 2012)

i would say i love kid rock. half your age and twice as hot! lol so back to the curb where i found you. being single in so cal at 45 best shape in years. i got a lot to choose from and i,m doing great. ive told her look in the mirror sooner or later you,ll see the piece of sheeiite looking back. ha ha ha:smthumbup:


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## Tainted Halo (Jun 14, 2012)

Dear stbxh,

Though the future is unknown for us at the moment I still consider you my close friend regardless what we both did. You have always been a good father and supporter and I Thank you for continuing to support me while I get back on my feet during our separation.


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## Bitter+Sweet (May 19, 2012)

Awakening2012 said:


> Dear H -
> 
> I am disappointed that you loved me enough to marry me, and I am disappointed that you left me and broke my heart. I am sad that the man who was so sure we were soul mates does not want to try harder to save the marriage, and cares so little for upholding our our marriage vows. I know that I hurt you, but am sick and tired of your abandonment rejection, distancing and indecision. I am doing my best to make amends, forgive myself, and carry on with building a happier, healthier life.
> 
> ...


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## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

MainStreetExile said:


> Dear L,
> 
> When all is said and done, I will never choose not to love you.


This just made me cry.
Despite being the garbage can of my stbxh's broken promises, I may always love him deep down. Wish it weren't so.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## UpnDown (May 4, 2012)

MyselfAgain said:


> This just made me cry.
> Despite being the garbage can of my stbxh's broken promises, I may always love him deep down. Wish it weren't so.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


You aren't alone in that department MA.


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## Bitter+Sweet (May 19, 2012)

Where do I begin....
_You promised me you wouldn't leave me like some people did_. Well you ain't here now. What happened to that promise?

_You always told me you loved me more than I loved you._ And I am the one who wanted you to stay and try to make the marriage work.

_You said you could go to your friends and talk to them b/c they wouldn't cosign on your bullsh**!_ But yet you couldn't listen to your wife when she was looking out for you and trying to keep you out of trouble.

_You wanted to be the head of the household, I was suppose to be submissive to you._ Yet you continued to do things that a leader/husband shouldn't do and expected me to be ok with that. What kind of wife would I be if I let you do wrong things and never tried to help you see that it was wrong.

_One of your fears was that I would leave you for someone better than you because you didn't have a lot going for you when we met. _ Funny how the tables turned. You've finally gotten to be in a better place financially & phsically & you are leaving me.

I was there for you when you didn't have a pot to piss in nor a window to throw it out of. (Literally).

If nothing else remember these 2 things:
1. What goes around comes around. What you do to others will come back to you.
2. Every man...I do mean every man that I have ever been serious with always wanted me back later. You don't miss your water until the well runs dry.


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## sadsoul101 (Oct 18, 2011)

One week before I moved out of the marriage condo, I read your journal. I read about a special woman that you fell in love with, you sought her out b/c you were unhappy, she heals you, she shows you that not all women would put you thru the sh*t that I did.

I no longer feel guilty that I read it, but I'm afraid to tell you that I know. I know about other woman.

I'm bitter that you got to keep our home and have a great job, I rent a room in a strangers house and I'm always worried about money.

I miss you more than I can put in words.

You can be such an ass*ole. Why didn't you just tell me about her?

You hurt me more than anyone ever has. I'm closer to you than anyone in my life. It hurts not to speak. It's really insensitive that you put pictures of our living room(after I moved out and you painted it) onto Facebook.

I know you have a heart. Where is your soul?

I'll always love you.


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## dream_weaver (Jun 5, 2012)

Dear ExH,
Thankyou for not making me feel supported by gambling away our money when we were on one wage while I was a stay at home mum looking after our baby...I hate you for making me solely responsible for paying our bills because you were incapable as whenever I gave you the bills to pay you gambled that money and then asking me where our money was going as I couldn't pay the bills.

You lied to me,your mother & your employers & have no shame....you stole money from your workplace,you lied to your mother to borrow money when you gambled as I'd give you a roasting as I couldn't pay the bills,you created so much anxiety for me by gambling as every time you were late from work or went out longer than normal I knew you were gambling & wondered how much money you'd lose.No it was'nt ok when you ocassionally brought some winnings home as you lost way more than you ever won & you were prepared to lose it in the first place.

Now we have separated I have seen you are still gambling as you don't have me stopping you.Your money issues aren't my fault-start taking responsibility for yourself...your tax debt is not my fault.

Everything you can't do is not my fault,you are useless & always have been,I just didn't realise how much until I left & stopped doing everything for you.


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## synthetic (Jan 5, 2012)

That I love her.


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## cloudwithleggs (Oct 13, 2011)

hmmm i did tell him he had a small ****, but it is true all that fat makes it about 4", that and he has ED :smthumbup:

i am getting really good at insulting, not normally part of my nature, but i have to make an exception for him.

the funny thing is his insults to me have no affect any more, he is not used to me insulting him though.


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## justabovewater (Jun 26, 2011)

Dear H,

I guess I'll start by apologizing for my share of the wrong done in our marriage. I know it must have been difficult to deal with a wife who was depressed or angry all the time. I know I spent alot of time wrapped up in my own head trying to figure out what was wrong with me and in doing so I missed the signs that you were so unhappy and our marriage was falling apart. I didn't realize until just recently that you didn't feel taken care of or supported. I thought I supported you, but I guess it wasn't enough. Contrary to your belief, I do love my family, both immediate and extended and feel that I was a very good mother. I did the best I could considering the mental illness I have. I tried to control it as best I could and even today, every day is a struggle, especially now. There's so much more I could say here, but I think you're done listening to me. My heart is in a million pieces, never to be whole again. I still love you with all that I am and hope that you can forgive me at some point because I never went into this marriage wanting to be bad wife or mother.


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## Matt1720 (May 7, 2012)

Don't confuse my current kindness with forgiveness. I am a kind and forgiving person, but I have no intention of having you in my life even as a friend when this is all said and done.


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## vi_bride04 (Mar 28, 2012)

Quit trying to mind f*ck me


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## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

justabovewater said:


> Dear H,
> 
> I guess I'll start by apologizing for my share of the wrong done in our marriage. I know it must have been difficult to deal with a wife who was depressed or angry all the time. I know I spent alot of time wrapped up in my own head trying to figure out what was wrong with me and in doing so I missed the signs that you were so unhappy and our marriage was falling apart. I didn't realize until just recently that you didn't feel taken care of or supported. I thought I supported you, but I guess it wasn't enough. Contrary to your belief, I do love my family, both immediate and extended and feel that I was a very good mother. I did the best I could considering the mental illness I have. I tried to control it as best I could and even today, every day is a struggle, especially now. There's so much more I could say here, but I think you're done listening to me. My heart is in a million pieces, never to be whole again. I still love you with all that I am and hope that you can forgive me at some point because I never went into this marriage wanting to be bad wife or mother.


That really touched me.


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

"Is sunblock useful in Hell? You'd better find that out."


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## lulubelle (Jun 28, 2012)

Runs like Dog said:


> "Is sunblock useful in Hell? You'd better find that out."



:smthumbup:


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## Orpheus (Jul 6, 2012)

It's ok, Dear. I know you're gone. I just haven't caught up with you yet.


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## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

I am deeply saddened to know that you will live a lonely, desperate, depressive, unhappy, unfulfilling life. It is not what I want for you. I will always love you much more than you will ever know. I feel deep sorrow knowing that you will never truly feel my love for you, or know the awesomeness of your own soul.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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