# wife made a sex tape with an ex...and showed me



## conflictedhubby

So, my wife and I have been married for 12 years. We have a great marriage and a hot sex life (though like everybody it goes through some ups and downs, but overall great).

To spice things up in bed in recent years we've whispered some pretty racy fantasies and talked about past lovers and things...we both get turned on by it.

About a month ago my wife whispered to me that she made a tape one time in college with her and her then boyfriend. She didn't have a lot of partners before me, since we met in college ourselves.

She kept the tape...it was the only copy. And one night after some drinks, we put it in the VCR (which we needed to get out of storage...lol)

anyway, I was extremely jealous but extremely turned on too. I can't believe I liked it as much as I did...she pleasured me while we watched and it didn't take long. She and he made three scenes in it and the camera work is pretty good.

I somehow feel wrong about this...how can I like watching my wife from years back, shortly before I knew her, doing this with another guy?

I have to admit, though, I can't stop watching...it's very hot and makes me sort of conflicted...

Am I nuts?


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## NextTimeAround

No you're not nuts. But since you're really turned by the film and the wife services you at the same time, AND it was made well before you came on the scene, the question to ask is, what's the problem.

My fiance and I have talked about our past sexual experiences. I suppose it helps that not once has he or I had that dreamy faraway look in our eye when we talked about it...... just matter of fact.

Since everything else seems to be right with this vid of your wife, I hope you can get over your unexplained apprehensions.


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## Machiavelli

conflictedhubby said:


> So, my wife and I have been married for 12 years. We have a great marriage and a hot sex life (though like everybody it goes through some ups and downs, but overall great).
> 
> To spice things up in bed in recent years we've whispered some pretty racy fantasies and talked about past lovers and things...we both get turned on by it.
> 
> About a month ago my wife whispered to me that she made a tape one time in college with her and her then boyfriend. She didn't have a lot of partners before me, since we met in college ourselves.
> 
> She kept the tape...it was the only copy. And one night after some drinks, we put it in the VCR (which we needed to get out of storage...lol)
> 
> anyway, I was extremely jealous but extremely turned on too. I can't believe I liked it as much as I did...she pleasured me while we watched and it didn't take long. She and he made three scenes in it and the camera work is pretty good.
> 
> I somehow feel wrong about this...how can I like watching my wife from years back, shortly before I knew her, doing this with another guy?
> 
> I have to admit, though, I can't stop watching...it's very hot and makes me sort of conflicted...
> 
> Am I nuts?


There is a lot of psychological theory behind why this happens. Probably the most generally accepted one is that it is a holdover from the misty Hyborean Age and we get fired up to reclaim the woman and generate a lot of battle semen to wipe out the OM's sperm. Look up "sperm wars" on Amazon.


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## pink_lady

We are often aroused by what we fear. Plus, it's a bit taboo, and like someone else mentioned, it's in the past, before she knew you.

Just make sure she knows the only videos she'll be making from now on are with you, so she doesn't think you're going to want to see her with other dudes regularly.


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## KJ5000

Shows how different people can be. I don't even want to know who my wife dated before me much less see a tape of her with someone else but that's what makes the world go round. 

Forget about a tape, there are men who want to be right there in the room watching while their wife gets her back blown out, so whatever works for the both of you is cool.


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## tacoma

Nope


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## jfv

I'd be pissed that she still hadn't destroyed the tape. 

Hope you haven't opened a can of worms by being cool with her watching herself with another man.


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## YinPrincess

I'd be mostly concerned about the fact that she had this tape for 12 + years and didn't tell you... But I don't think being aroused by it is very abnormal at all...
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## olwhatsisname

my wife of 48 yrs, said recentlly, she wasn't a virgin when we met. she shared something special with you. that took courage and love,that you should understand. life only gets better when you work on it


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## conflictedhubby

YinPrincess said:


> I'd be mostly concerned about the fact that she had this tape for 12 + years and didn't tell you... But I don't think being aroused by it is very abnormal at all...
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I hear what you are saying but I don't actually feel deceived that she kept the tape. She had it buried in storage and said she always remembered it but didn't think much of it through the years. And truthfully, when we were dating and then early on in our marriage I wouldn't have been able to handle it, but it has been strangely very arousing to watch now.

When she pulled it out, she wasn't sure it would even still work and how good the quality would be. Given its age, it's not completely clear, but they had a pretty tight closeup going... especially during this really long oral sex session. It's a mind blowing tape (no pun intended!) and it's definitely added a different dimension to our sex life...so i'm not complaining but it's a really weird thing to get my mind around...


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## I got this

cuckold related?


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## YinPrincess

conflictedhubby said:


> I hear what you are saying but I don't actually feel deceived that she kept the tape. She had it buried in storage and said she always remembered it but didn't think much of it through the years. And truthfully, when we were dating and then early on in our marriage I wouldn't have been able to handle it, but it has been strangely very arousing to watch now.
> 
> When she pulled it out, she wasn't sure it would even still work and how good the quality would be. Given its age, it's not completely clear, but they had a pretty tight closeup going... especially during this really long oral sex session. It's a mind blowing tape (no pun intended!) and it's definitely added a different dimension to our sex life...so i'm not complaining but it's a really weird thing to get my mind around...


I hear that! I actually think this is an opportunity for you both to become even closer... As someone stated earlier, it took a lot of courage for her to share this with you, and it speaks volumes about your relationship in my opinion. It says to me that she feels completely safe and secure with you and trusts you enough to (potentially) put herself in quite a vulnerable position. She may not even see it like that, but that's my take. 

The "weirdness" will probably go away over time, but if it persists, I imagine that you "should" be able to be just as open and vulnerable with her and just say something like, "Watching this tape was sooo exciting! In a way, it also made me feel kind of strange about it, too..." And open up a dialog that way.

My ex and I had a tape... Ahem, and it fell into his "dad's" possession...    And er, when I got it back (after a year!) I took a hammer to that thing and sent it to VHS heaven. I couldn't ever imagine sharing it with my husband, even if it still existed, but that's just me! LMAO!!!  
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Omgitsjoe

Goes to show how different we all are ?? There will be some who wouldnt think this is a big deal and others who would be very upset by it ??? 

I for one would not have a problem since 1) it happened prior to us meeting and 2) I get to now watch my wife as that porn vixen I've always wanted her to be !!

The husband can now watch his wife in her own porn video which not only is the amateur type ( very sexy ) but he also knows the girl ( even sexier  )


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## Dad&Hubby

You're turned on because you're watching your wife in porn. 

You're also turned on because of your drive to be the "Alpha" in the pack. (The only one who gets to impregnate the females speaking in a very base naturalistic fashion)

You're confused because you feel you SHOULD hate it but you don't. 

Don't sweat it man, enjoy it. As long as your woman is just with you now, it's all good.

Caveat: Personally, I wouldn't want to see it. My wife had partners before me, did things before me and I'm 100% cool with that. BUT I wouldn't want to watch any of it LOL. Make one with her and watch it...SURE! Don't want to watch her with another dude (or woman)...TOYS...hmmmm that could be fun.....(time to go find the camera).


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## weightlifter

Because it was before you met her?

Am I jealous of my wife's past lovers? Yea but it rates a 2 on the 10 scale. Plus you got to see what she looked like in her early 20s.

I'm convinced its simply differing psychology. I have a Brit friend. His wife was asked to do one of those naked charity calendars. He went nuts and it never happened. I would ask "is anyone going to touch you? ". If not... Whatever. Neither turns me on nor bothers me. Lol my wife would never do it, it simply is not an issue to me until there is body contact. If there were body contact ( think Janet Jackson style handbra) I would go Rambo style crazy no.


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## Jambri

Not abnormal at all. I can't think of many scenarios that would be as hot as watching your wife on tape while you both play together. Many guys get aroused by the thought of their wife with another man because it's taboo but in your case it is safe because you weren't married at the time. So you get the excitement factor without the consequences. Nice....


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## RandomDude

Sheez, if my STBX did that for me I think I would have blown in 2 seconds!


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## larry.gray

RandomDude said:


> Sheez, if my STBX did that for me I think I would have blown in 2 seconds!


Are you thinking of her when she was with another woman - and that's what's got you excited?


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## RandomDude

When I was still with her, any stories of her with other men OR women turned me on heaps. To watch it in action on tape and have her pleasuring me at the same time I don't think I would have been able to contain myself. But alas it never happened.


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## johnnycomelately

It turns you on, which probably turns her on. What is the problem? Of course it makes you feel a bit weird, all the best sex does.


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## aug

I am surprised it still worked, both the machine and the tape.

Have you consider getting it digitized? This way it keep forever.

Was there a third person in the room? Who was doing the camera work while they were busy? 

How does she know for sure there aren't other copies floating around? on the internet?


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## couple

For me it would be both extremely sexually exciting and a little disturbing at the same time. It would arouse great passion and i would savor every second of it.


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## 808YinPrincess

I would need to see the video to determine how I feel about this.


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