# Any men like foreplay



## marriedwithkids1 (Nov 10, 2010)

I am curious. Do any couples have this problem. It seems to be "flip-flopped from most couples. 

He wants to take things slow. He likes to be aroused teased and to savor the experience. For me once i am aroused i want to be stimulated to orgasm. Luckily for me that is not dificult. If my hubby goes down on me or goes in me i will come in a few minutes and typically have many, many orgasms in a short period of time. It doesn't seem to matter how slow or fast he goes I still climax. After about 15 minutes i want him to come in me wich i love. Having him come in me gives me another strong orgams. I am not sure what it is that causes this but it is very strong. 

Does anyone else experience this


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## nice777guy (Nov 23, 2009)

Foreplay?

Never heard of it...please explain...

Actually, you sound a lot like my wife. Our "quality" is good, but our "quantity" isn't. So - when we do start fooling around, it doesn't take much to get either of us aroused.

I think we both 'like' foreplay, but we really don't do a whole lot of it.


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## marcopoly69 (Sep 7, 2010)

Yes, I do...not for too long, but I do. I like kissing and being close to my wife's face and smell her face and lips....just that moment when is dark, with music in the background and being close... afterwards, we move to the foreplay that is more sexual...depending how is the mood. But includes me going down on her, or the other way around, sometimes we'll do a 69, and also I would kiss her behind if she is horny enough and in the right mood...she'll let me know...or I would ask in advance if I don't want to feel the rejection....anyhow, foreplay, makes everything better....but sometimes, mostly during the busy weeks, we'll just go the the main course but with passion and different positions and trying to keep it fresh and exciting....when we both are health physically and mentally....


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## marriedwithkids1 (Nov 10, 2010)

It is not even a time contraint thing. It is like once my motor get running i want to go right tothe main event and once that is underway I am like "driven" to have a bunch of O's and then I want him to come as I have kind of "had enough" and want him to come. I feel bad as he has said to me he likes to take it slower it is just not my thing. He sometimes complains that without a good "warm up" so to speak it is less satisfying. He comes and all but, it is not as satisfying for him. Again I am curious if other men feel this way or what. Sometimes i feel bad becuase i am left VERY satisfied.


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## jamesa (Oct 22, 2010)

I like foreplay. My missus likes to get to penetration sooner than I do.


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## janesmith (Nov 29, 2010)

when you say NO foreplay what do yall do? get naked and stick it in? how does that work? Am i reading this NO foreplay too literal?


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## nice777guy (Nov 23, 2009)

I don't exactly want to hear "Can we please hurry up and get this over with?"

I've never complained if my wife wants to speed certain things along and skip over some of the pleasantries.


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## janesmith (Nov 29, 2010)

nice777guy said:


> I don't exactly want to hear "Can we please hurry up and get this over with?"
> 
> I've never complained if my wife wants to speed certain things along and skip over some of the pleasantries.


LMAO.....she doe not say that!!....who says things like that, lol. Im amazed. If i want my husband to hurry up and come, i have skills for that. who is THAT crass? lmao, how totally ignorant


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## nice777guy (Nov 23, 2009)

Well - Frasier comes on at 11...


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## janesmith (Nov 29, 2010)

im sorry, please dont take offense. I was not laughing at your pain, i was laughing at the absurdity that she would speak to you like that. How insulting


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## nice777guy (Nov 23, 2009)

janesmith said:


> im sorry, please dont take offense. I was not laughing at your pain, i was laughing at the absurdity that she would speak to you like that. How insulting


As long as we get started by 10:55 its not so bad...


GOTCHA!!!!


Sorry - I was just kidding.


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## janesmith (Nov 29, 2010)

nice777guy said:


> As long as we get started by 10:55 its not so bad...
> 
> 
> GOTCHA!!!!
> ...


:lol:


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## reachingshore (Jun 10, 2010)

marriedwithkids1 said:


> It is not even a time contraint thing. It is like once my motor get running i want to go right tothe main event and once that is underway I am like "driven" to have a bunch of O's and then I want him to come as I have kind of "had enough" and want him to come. I feel bad as he has said to me he likes to take it slower it is just not my thing. He sometimes complains that without a good "warm up" so to speak it is less satisfying. He comes and all but, it is not as satisfying for him. Again I am curious if other men feel this way or what. Sometimes i feel bad because i am left VERY satisfied.


My Husband is like that. I used to be like you - in the sense that I wanted it here, now and hard. I have never had any problem with multiple orgasms, and also had to beg for him to (finally) come.

Then I got hold of some historical Harlequinn (you know, 19th century England, Lords and virgin Ladies, seduction of the innocent, LOL) and it got me to thinking that maybe I am at a point in my sexual life where I should get myself more focused on the road traveled, rather than the destination? When I consciously approached having sex that way, the whole experience became different somehow (I bacame more focused on "us", rather than "myself").

Don't know about the differences in the level of his physical satisfaction. However certainly it has a lot to do with his level of emotional (and/or, err, intellectual?) satisfaction. He kinda "gets off" on the fact that he can make you satiated to the point where you almost pass out?


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

Our foreplay is all day long. 

I constantly joke with my husband about his big toy. I constantly play with his toy. During the day, his toy is being stroked, sucked, and lusted........................ 

He fondles my breasts all the time, he checks my pu$$$ all the time, he spanks my butt all the time......................

We get horny easily. 

When I am horny, I just hop on him and take him. 

When he is horny, he chases me to the bedroom and do me doggy. 

When we are both horny, show starts................

Sex is not only for the actually intercourse. Sex is involved with a lot of playing.....................


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## Mrs.LonelyGal (Nov 8, 2010)

^^^
wow. just, wow.
Pretty sad, IMHO...


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## az_wife (Nov 18, 2010)

Mrs.LonelyGal said:


> ^^^
> wow. just, wow.
> Pretty sad, IMHO...[/QUOTE
> 
> ...


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## TheTopChef (Oct 14, 2010)

Mrs.LonelyGal said:


> ^^^
> wow. just, wow.
> Pretty sad, IMHO...


I agree. I don't know the back story on that poster, but that's really sad.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

You ask if any men like forplay... 

My answer is -- If I do not give my husband some forplay , I would get alot less sex. Soon to be reaching 50 in a few years, he is not raring to go -like a young man anymore. I didn't seem to care back in the day, took it completely for granted. I needed MORE forplay THEN. And now it is HE that needs more Forplay. This bothers me more than I care to admit. Causes most of my emotional moments with my husband. Those morning erections are few & far between, very little brushing up against me causes one -as these were automatic just 5 yrs ago. But then again, we didnt do it as much -then, so this played a part. 

I have to remind myself I "drain" him almost daily. So of coarse he needs more TIME and attention. 

I know for me, I like to make it last. The Forplay, but I have to sometimes jump on it when it is there or It might diminish. It is balancing act between Me & my husband sometimes. So long as we can still get there, all is good.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

Foreplay, mid-play, and after-play... They can all be good! 

I like to tease to begin, I like to cuddle in between/after... Maybe not all the time; there is a time and place for quickies too. I try not to overthink things too much. 

Clint


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## Scannerguard (Jan 26, 2010)

I havent' read through all of these but I'll answer:

Yes, I like foreplay. I like it a lot. And I like Greenpearl's answer that it starts throughout the day with a flirty text or something.

That being said, when it comes to physical foreplay, I am noticing as I mature, there is a "window" and I have spoken to this to another guy friend when we exchange lockerroom talk. He confirms what I am saying.

The "window" means there comes a certain point with women we've had in our arms naked where you start to think, "Okay. . .are we just going to salivate all over each other here or are we going to get to the main event?" Usually, it's up to the guy on that.

When the window "closes", well, the big guy down there (there are 3 parties in the room - Man, Woman, Penis - always remember that) may not be cooperating.

For me. . .an estimation - window: 

Minimum: 5 minutes (yeah, the mere thought of sex or the wind blowing doesn't do it for me anymore)

Maximum: 30 minutes (had better get to the main event and if you aren't raring to go by then, well, we had better change direction)

When the foreplay window closes, it's like the 3rd party is saying, "Well, I guess you ain't getting laid there you dumbass. Nice going! I'm going to sleep."


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## southbound (Oct 31, 2010)

I'm a man and I didn't need foreplay, but I would have enjoyed more. My wife was either in the mood or was not in the mood. If she was in the mood, she was ready for penetration, or whatever the main act might have been that night. If she was not in the mood, she was not interested in any foreplay to try to get in the mood.


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## mike1 (Jun 15, 2009)

marriedwithkids1 said:


> I am curious. Do any couples have this problem. It seems to be "flip-flopped from most couples.
> 
> He wants to take things slow. He likes to be aroused teased and to savor the experience. For me once i am aroused i want to be stimulated to orgasm. Luckily for me that is not dificult. If my hubby goes down on me or goes in me i will come in a few minutes and typically have many, many orgasms in a short period of time. It doesn't seem to matter how slow or fast he goes I still climax. After about 15 minutes i want him to come in me wich i love. Having him come in me gives me another strong orgams. I am not sure what it is that causes this but it is very strong.
> 
> Does anyone else experience this


My wife represents these remarks! Seriously my wife could have written that post. I WISH I could spend a lot more time savoring the whole experience and leading up to it. One of my issues with our sex life is that once she's aroused she wants to get to the main event ASAP. Most often if we're having sex it's because she's aroused already which means our 'foreplay' may last only a minute or two, actually sometimes she just wants me inside her immediately. Like you she'll orgasm very quickly (usually within a couple of minutes). She wants me to cum at the same time she does (as do I). It makes it more intense for both of us so I understand how you get a strong orgasm. However, unlike you, if my wife has an orgasm and I haven't yet then she doesn't want me to cum inside her . Unless of course she has another O, which happens but isn't often with penetration. Usually once she gets off it's like a switch is flipped and she just wants it over with. 

Like your husband often feel unsatisfied even though I've had an orgasm. For me personally I don't get nearly enough sex so after I've been feeling sexually frustrated for 1, 2 or more weeks and finally get to be intimate with my wife it's just over way too quickly. We both have an O but I feel like there should be more behind it.

For example there are times when I take care of myself and I will sometimes take an hour to get to orgasm. I wish I could experience that with my wife. The warming up and building up and slowing down ends with a much more satisfactory orgasm! If that could happen when I'm with my wife that would bring things to a whole new level.


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## marriedwithkids1 (Nov 10, 2010)

Mike, 
OMG you sound like my hubby. If he is alone he usually takes 30 minute or more. He would take more if it were not for having to work, deal with house bills, sleep etc. He enjoys to do this thing where he starts and stops and get himself really aroused. Our sex life has been great from my side as I have many O’s that are quite powerful. He has told me he enjoys more foreplay. He is a giving man and enjoys satisfying me. He has not come out and said he is less than satisfied as I would guess he thinks this could possibly hurt my feelings. 
We have been tried different ways to compromise. The more I read on this site and others I think that there are many men who may be like this. I have read about women who’s husband turn to porn rather than sex. I wonder if it is actually the men liking having their arousal/orgasm on their own terms because of the orgasm it produces- be the allure to masturbation.
I think this is a great subject to explore.


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## fatiguedfatherof4 (Apr 28, 2011)

My wife and I have foreplay all day long too. Every passing there is a kiss and not just a peck but not a full on make out either (we have 4 kids!) but a slow sensual meaningful one, enough to leave us with that goofy ass look on each others faces the way we did when we met 15 years ago. If she's doing something I may come up behind her and gently brush her hair aside and softly kiss the back of her neck as I stroke her arms and shoulders. And if I'm doing something outside she may bring me something cold to drink and as she hands it to me takes my face in both of her hands, guiding my lips towards hers in a passionate embrace, then whisper into my ear how much she cannot wait to put the kids to bed tonight to be alone with me (as she gives the front of my pants a squeeze while she says it). This can go on all day, now tell me that a quickie beats that!!


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## lisa3girls (Apr 6, 2011)

fatiguedfatherof4 said:


> My wife and I have foreplay all day long too. Every passing there is a kiss and not just a peck but not a full on make out either (we have 4 kids!) but a slow sensual meaningful one, enough to leave us with that goofy ass look on each others faces the way we did when we met 15 years ago. If she's doing something I may come up behind her and gently brush her hair aside and softly kiss the back of her neck as I stroke her arms and shoulders. And if I'm doing something outside she may bring me something cold to drink and as she hands it to me takes my face in both of her hands, guiding my lips towards hers in a passionate embrace, then whisper into my ear how much she cannot wait to put the kids to bed tonight to be alone with me (as she gives the front of my pants a squeeze while she says it). This can go on all day, now tell me that a quickie beats that!!



I am so jealous...my husbands idea of all day foreplay was assaulting my boobs roughly or making a crass comment about his junk....not even at all affectionate or romantic.


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## themrs (Oct 16, 2009)

My husband likes foreplay more than me too. He also likes to take things slower than I do. I don't need a whole lot of prep. If I'm down for doing it, let's do it! 

I just think the things that put me in the mood have nothing to do with anything physical, so if he's doing all the right things (mainly talking to me in a way that makes me feel loved and sexy) I don't need anything else. I will pounce on him!


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## fatiguedfatherof4 (Apr 28, 2011)

lisa3girls said:


> I am so jealous...my husbands idea of all day foreplay was assaulting my boobs roughly or making a crass comment about his junk....not even at all affectionate or romantic.


What about other little things done to make you feel special? Some guys have a difficult time with their more sensual side.. which alot of men confuse with their sensitive side. Hell, I still have a difficult time with that but being sensual, tender loving towards my one and only, now, to me there;s just no other way to be. What I was trying to ask was does he do any special little things to make you happy? Before we had children we had much more freedom to express how we felt (besides physically) like cards, make a romantic dinner for 2 (I'm the cook in the house btw) or one that sticks out for her that she told me was the time I laid rose petals from the front door (for when she came home from work) to a freshly drawn bath (helps to know her schedule if this is something any fella wants to do for his s/o) with a few of her favorite scents (for my gal it's candles/incense and her fave coconut bath soap). Then as she's relaxing I put the finishing touch on dinner. When she was ready to get out, I had her big soft bathrobe ready for her to put on and then take her hand and take her to the candle light dinner I had spent the better part of the day preparing. The rest of the night's activities I'll keep to myself 
Remember now this is all BEFORE we had the monsters... I mean our lovely, well behaved angels.
Best of luck Lisa3, you deserve to be treated like the woman he treated you like from jump.... assuming he wasnt always so brutish about your needs.


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## roymcavoy (Apr 15, 2011)

marriedwithkids1 said:


> If my hubby goes down on me or goes in me i will come in a few minutes and typically have many, many orgasms in a short period of time


Herein lies the problem. We men, have one GOOD blast -- and, on rare occasion -- perhaps a second. We do not have the ability to orgasm "many, many" times. If we did, it is unlikely we would EVER do anything else.

That being the case, we would prefer to warm-up to the occasion, in the manner it takes Old Faithful time to erupt.


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## lisa3girls (Apr 6, 2011)

Fatuigedfather-- he wasn't always SO brutish, but did tend toward it. At least though he used to do little things for me, now it is few and far between...things are not so good right now. It makes me sad.


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## tjohnson (Mar 10, 2010)

Women should consider their man's desire for foreplay important. Someone (perhaps me when i have more time should start a new thread for women who would ignore this post based upon its tittle. I think many men like mike1 may actually gravitate toward solo sex for this reason. It took me many years to "get in touch with my feelings" to understand this to be the case. I would image other men feel the same way. 

There is a notion (that my wife shared until i enlightened her) that if the white stuff comes out then the the man is happy. For the most part they are right. For many men who would rather have mediocre sex then perhaps imply that "it could be better" they may resist saying anything. From what i have read some guys are glad to "take what they can get" anyway.....It should be realized that not all orgams or sexual acts are as sexually "relieving" or enjoyable as others i am sure this is true of women but, i have not read much about this. I started a post tittled "the ultimate male orgasm" ther was hardly any response..

Many men like myself sometimes choose to "go it allone" not because we don't love our wife, find them attractive or want to look at porn etc. We do it because we can do it on our terms. We can get off quick (if that is what we want) or take it slow. It time permits I will take a long time. On such occasions the orgasm that results is quite powerful. In terms of how it feels (the intensity of the contractions) and also as evidenced by the amount and ejaculatory force of my semen. 

The other benefit i have found (which chould be interesting for the ladies to know) is that i find if i have a really powerful O, i won't want/need to have sex for a couple days or more. 

If you really want to give your man a thrill (or keep him off your back (excuse the pun) reseach "stop and start method" it is also called "edging" online. It is something that men do to intensify their orgasm. While general information refers to a masturbation technique, it can be incorported into partnered sex althoght some of the logistics can be a little challanging. Some of my previous posts may have referenced what my wife and i have done to incorporate this into our sex life. Some of it i recall was deleted i because it got a little graphic. The moderators thought it was not appropriate and since this is a grey area I cannot blame their decision or we wind up with realy wacos here.


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## magnoliagal (Mar 30, 2011)

I've recently learned that my H wants/needs/likes lots of foreplay. I think my husband was like tjohnson or mike1. I had no idea obviously because he never told me (so I'm not taking blame for it). But now that I'm here and read what men want I'm trying new things and figuring this out on my own. My husband has responded really well. I start at lunch with flirty talk and end it with a massage after he's had a long day at work. And when we do have sex I take my time and make sure he's good and turned on before starting. By the time I'm done he's in more of a hurry than I am. 

...... I'm learning.

Oh and I just have to brag. My H has been bending over backwards for me this past week. He jumps on chores, takes care of things without being reminded or even asked sometimes, he's eating better (something I've wanted him to do), etc. Just from me learning how to be a better wife from reading these boards I've got a new husband.


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## tjohnson (Mar 10, 2010)

magnoliagal said:


> I've recently learned that my H wants/needs/likes lots of foreplay. I think my husband was like tjohnson or mike1. I had no idea obviously because he never told me (so I'm not taking blame for it). But now that I'm here and read what men want I'm trying new things and figuring this out on my own. My husband has responded really well. I start at lunch with flirty talk and end it with a massage after he's had a long day at work. And when we do have sex I take my time and make sure he's good and turned on before starting. By the time I'm done he's in more of a hurry than I am.
> 
> ...... I'm learning.
> 
> Oh and I just have to brag. My H has been bending over backwards for me this past week. He jumps on chores, takes care of things without being reminded or even asked sometimes, he's eating better (something I've wanted him to do), etc. Just from me learning how to be a better wife from reading these boards I've got a new husband.



We are such simple creatures (us men) keep us happy and we will run around like puppies trying to reciprocate to make you happy in return. It is a great cycle to have going on!!


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

I like the thought that every couple is different in their dynamics. With my current partner, the teasing and foreplay can last literally for days. I think the worst (best?) was when she was diagnosed with strep throat. So we used the time to tease and torment each other without actually "doing" anything serious. By the end of the week, I was ready to get strep throat from her for a single deep kiss...

But even our "regular" nights still involve anywhere from 30 minutes to 2 hours of foreplay before the main event. This only works because she loves to be teased, and I love teasing her. Progressing her to the point that I can touch her arm, and it sends shivers through her entire body. Or whispering in her ear, telling her a fantasy...

I would consider our times together to be very sensual, not just sexual. Yes, there's been times that I've pinned her up against a wall when she walks in the door, and not let her go till she came. But even that I would usually consider foreplay, as we hadn't had sex yet.

C


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

I don't 'need' it. I like it. I like play.


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## magnoliagal (Mar 30, 2011)

tjohnson said:


> We are such simple creatures (us men) keep us happy and we will run around like puppies trying to reciprocate to make you happy in return. It is a great cycle to have going on!!


The challenge for me is making sure my heart is in it. If I'm not feelin it he reads me like a book and it's game over. It's not hard per se it's just making sure I'm not thinking about dishes, laundry, kids, etc. when I'm focused on him. What he's wanted all this time was some attention both in and out of the bedroom.

And yes I think now it was oh so simple and I'm kicking myself for not finding this site sooner. 

Oh and I was wrong about him not telling me. He gave "hints" which I didn't get until now. They were encrpyted guy talk and he never elaborated.


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

Feeling it and being bad at it are two different things. The wifey is not good at this, doesn't appreciate any guidance and won't talk about it. Sometimes I just want to tie her up and do unspeakable things to her. And then quiz her later to see if she learned anything.:FIREdevil:


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## southbound (Oct 31, 2010)

I'm a guy and always enjoyed foreplay more than my x-wife. I didn't need it for arousal, but I enjoyed it. I don't know if others are like this or not, but when I fantasized about sex, it wasn't the orgasm that I thought about a lot, although that is the climax, but I always imagined everything that led to it. Maybe I'm weird.


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## magnoliagal (Mar 30, 2011)

southbound said:


> I'm a guy and always enjoyed foreplay more than my x-wife. I didn't need it for arousal, but I enjoyed it. I don't know if others are like this or not, but when I fantasized about sex, it wasn't the orgasm that I thought about a lot, although that is the climax, but I always imagined everything that led to it. Maybe I'm weird.


Based on the general consensus from the men here you aren't weird at all.


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## marriedguy (Nov 7, 2009)

Nope..not weird..actually when I fantasized about sex it was always about foreplay..that actual intercourse was about 10 percent of my imagination..its all about the ride..not the final score..


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## tjohnson (Mar 10, 2010)

Like southbound, I enjoy the journey. 

To me there is NOTHING like the feeling I get when i am aching to come and yet remain at a high level of arousal. To me this is a great feeling. While I still like the end, this is great too.


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## jackhei60 (May 5, 2011)

Yes,not too long.


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## Rough Patch Sewing (Apr 18, 2011)

I love foreplay. I want like to message my wife and explore and enjoy her body. It is great and she feels loved and satisfied too. When I am really excited, she gets the most passionate messages. It is also a great time to connect emotionally and to get her ready for the rest of the fun!


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