# Emotional Fiance



## inluv (Jun 11, 2012)

I lost my job in May and have been fighting with the company and the state along with trying to find a job in the meantime. My fiance has been flipping out on me and telling me he's not going to help with the bills and if we get an eviction notice he's breaking up with and moving him and his kids out. I Love him with all of my heart and I am trying but he doesn't seem to see that. He just belittles me lately and pushes me away. He just left and told me to get away from him. What should I do?


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## Amplexor (Feb 13, 2008)

He's not emotional.

He's controlling. immature, selfish and abusive. Beat him to the punch and tell him to hit the road. Marrying a man like this does not bode for a happy future. Sorry.


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## lamaga (May 8, 2012)

What????

Honey, don't marry this guy. Don't ever sleep with this guy again. He is a putz.

I could write four more paragraphs, but really, I think "he is a putz" says it all. If he loved you, he'd be looking for a way to help you out in your time of need.


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## sisters359 (Apr 9, 2009)

Thank him for showing his true colors before the wedding, and send him packing. Geez, how heartless (although as always, it is possible there is more to this story than given.) If you are typically reliable and this is just an economy-related job loss, then he's out of line. Not a little; a whole lot. Why would you love someone so mean?


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## humanbecoming (Mar 14, 2012)

inluv said:


> I lost my job in May and have been fighting with the company and the state along with trying to find a job in the meantime. My fiance has been flipping out on me and telling me he's not going to help with the bills and if we get an eviction notice he's breaking up with and moving him and his kids out. I Love him with all of my heart and I am trying but he doesn't seem to see that. He just belittles me lately and pushes me away. He just left and told me to get away from him. What should I do?



That is ridiculous... You deserve better. If you can't work through this as a couple, don't get married, because life can throw much worse at you.


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## inluv (Jun 11, 2012)

t is hdor me to call it quits. He has good moments but only when we have $. He hasn't worked more than a couple of months in the 3 years we have lived together. How do I get him to support me and us? It's hard.


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## Amplexor (Feb 13, 2008)

Add sponge to my list

I'm sorry he is what he is and will likely never change nor try to. You really should move on and find someone more supportive.


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## lamaga (May 8, 2012)

Listen to yourself...he is nice only when you have money?

And you cannot "get him" to support you. You cannot even "get him" to love you.

He has shown you who he is. If you stay after this, then it's all on you. You've bought it, and you are not going to like it.


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## A Bit Much (Sep 14, 2011)

inluv said:


> t is hdor me to call it quits. He has good moments but only when we have $. He hasn't worked more than a couple of months in the 3 years we have lived together. How do I get him to support me and us? It's hard.


Show him the door. You ask how do you get him to support you? When has he EVER done that? Why should he start now? That's your job to support all of you (that's what he's been shown).

Cut the dead weight and let him leave. You don't need that mess.


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## inluv (Jun 11, 2012)

He just called me to tell me he wrecked his truck but he's ok and doesn't need me. Just wanted me to know. Oh ya and tomorrow he's packing all of their things, including the food in the house, and moving. Why can't people realize how bad words can hurt. I have been in a physically abusive marriage before, but I think that is easier to deal with than this.


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## inluv (Jun 11, 2012)

Thank you to all who have posted. I must sound pathetic but your words help.


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## lamaga (May 8, 2012)

You're right, inluv, some things hurt worse than fists.

You WILL get through this. You will. And once you are through the immediate financial crisis -- and you WILL get through it! -- you need to get some counseling to understand why you keep picking abusive men.

There is nothing wrong with you. There is, however, something very wrong with your picker.


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## A Bit Much (Sep 14, 2011)

inluv said:


> He just called me to tell me he wrecked his truck but he's ok and doesn't need me. Just wanted me to know. Oh ya and tomorrow he's packing all of their things, including the food in the house, and moving. Why can't people realize how bad words can hurt. I have been in a physically abusive marriage before, but I think that is easier to deal with than this.


He's sounds like a parasite. They suck the host dry, then move on when the host dies.

What are you missing? Be honest with yourself. Maybe you don't know what a healthy relationship looks like. You went from a man who hit you to a man that takes from you and verbally beats you down.


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## A Bit Much (Sep 14, 2011)

lamaga said:


> You're right, inluv, some things hurt worse than fists.
> 
> You WILL get through this. You will. And once you are through the immediate financial crisis -- and you WILL get through it! -- you need to get some counseling to understand why you keep picking abusive men.
> 
> There is nothing wrong with you. There is, however, something very wrong with your picker.


Broken picker does it every time. I say that about my ex's. My picker was broken.


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## tm84 (Jul 24, 2011)

This is NOT someone you want to spend the rest of your life with. From what you wrote, he's abusive, manipulative, highly inconsiderate and disrespectful. This will not change anytime soon, if it's been going on this long. Nothing you do or say will change him. Run away before you wind up a completely broken person. You deserve much better.


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## inluv (Jun 11, 2012)

Thank you. You made me laugh for the first time all weekend . I will get my picker fixed. LOL


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## YinPrincess (Jul 31, 2011)

Stay with him as long as you need to, to learn a very hard lesson. (I had to as well, and probably am now). Just don't marry him.

I speak from experience - they don't change and you WILL get tired of it. Sorry. *hugs*
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## inluv (Jun 11, 2012)

Well I guess he is moving out tomorrow. Apparently for sure because for the first time I'm not talking him out of it. He was ok with me then took a nap and nothing has changed. Oh well, live and learn. :smthumbup: Oh ya, he wants my engagement ring back. Can't I keep it since he gave it to me or do I have to give it back?


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

THANK GOD he pulled this before you got married.

Tell him to go. Buh bye!! Seriously...bad news. FOR BETTER OR WORSE, RICHER OR POORER is not something he could handle AT ALL.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

inluv said:


> Well I guess he is moving out tomorrow. Apparently for sure because for the first time I'm not talking him out of it. He was ok with me then took a nap and nothing has changed. Oh well, live and learn. :smthumbup: Oh ya, he wants my engagement ring back. Can't I keep it since he gave it to me or do I have to give it back?


If you were to break up with him, give it back.

If he breaks it off with you, keep it. It's a gift.


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## jenniferswe (Apr 23, 2012)

What a terrible thing to have happen. I'm very sorry you lost your job. It is so sad that he is so mean and not supportive. It sounds like you are trying hard to find a job and all. It takes a while to find a good job especially during this economy.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

inluv said:


> Thank you. You made me laugh for the first time all weekend . I will get my picker fixed. LOL


You might be LOLing, but you really do need to figure out why you get yourself in emotionally and physically abusive relationships.

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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