# Wife said she was unhappy and left



## Braden Smith (Sep 17, 2016)

My wife told me she wasnt happy anymore and then took off for the weekend to her mom's house with our son. I obviously reacted terrible and got mad at her. Once it set in I went through the stage of "I need to fix this ASAP". After showing up uninvited asking for forgiveness, many gifts, emails, and speaking to her mother closely, it obviously made things out to be still bad. Go figure right? 
Well she has been enjoying her time with her mom and going on trips while I have been worried sick. I've done intensive evaluation on myself (probably too critical too) and have read much material and realized I handled it very wrong.
I'm trying to give her space and respect her wishes, but it is hard, but it is needed. A main reason why she had left was due to me keeping her from her family. I've tried to show her any moment I can that I have changed, but it's hard for her to see that I believe. I actually truly do love her family and think this has been a very good thing for me (I hate saying that because i wish it was just over though). She agreed to go to counseling with me and all that is said on her end is she needs to work on forgiving me. 
Here's what has me worried though.

I love her with all my heart and would work through anything to make her feel loved and special each day and want our family to be together. I just feel terrible that I am the one that has causes this to happen because she felt she couldn't talk to me and it took her a lot of courage to do this I believe. 

But I feel sometimes as if she's beating the love right out of me.. I don't think she loves me anymore nor cares for me. And it hurts incredibly bad. To the point that I wonder what it will be like even if she does decide to come back.. deep down, I'll know where I am in her heart.

It's been a month now and I've gotten to take her out on some dates and I can make her laugh, smile, and what not, but it seems like she doesn't want to feel anything towards me anymore.

Ive read a lot of material that has helped me cope with the matter, but I can't help but feel the longer she's away, the more she will feel that this is the norm and will gain a routine of it so it seems harder to come back.

I truly am sincere, but for all she knows it's just an act. I've gotten my own counselor to try and help me as well and plan to keep at it so I do not relapse either because i never want to have her go through this again.. nor do I.. 

She doesn't want to talk to me about it and I've said pretty much everything anyways. There's nothing I can do I feel other than let time run its course. I just am worried because sometimes I feel like I should just give up because she will never love me again and doesn't care for me anymore anyways. 

I can't imagine how terrible it would be to have to go on without her because I feel that she's my purpose in life and love her so much. 

I'm so lost and I feel as if I've let my son down now too because of my selfish actions in the past.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Adelais (Oct 23, 2013)

Sorry you have lost your wife and son.

I have a few questions.

Why did you keep her from her family?

Why are you worried sick that she is going on trips with her mom? Are you jealous of her relationships with her family?

How can she beat the love out of you if you know she doesn't love you anymore due to your actions, and you are the one saying you love her with all your heart?

Did you work on yourself while she still lived in the home with you, or did you just start after she left?

Whether she comes back or not, keep working on yourself so you will be a better person. Do it for yourself, and it will become real.

Don't date while she is gone, if you love her. If you date, it will prove to her what a jerk you are, and that you are only faking to try to get her back.


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## Marc878 (Aug 26, 2015)

Fix and work on yourself. You can't fix her. The good thing you've learned is being clingy, needy and constantly pestering her will push her further away at this time. Your actions long term will speak louder than anything you can say.

IMO live for yourself and let her contact you.

I would check the phonebill just to make sure no one else is involved.


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## farsidejunky (Mar 19, 2014)

Being with a controlling partner will suck the life out of you.

You must have a high level of fear to need to exact so much control over your wife's life.


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