# Your Definition of Love (Men/Women)



## MarriedWifeInLove (May 28, 2010)

My husband said something this weekend that got me to thinking.

Our definition of love - its not the same.

I said "love ya sweetie" in passing on Saturday and he said I love you too even though you don't believe it.

I responded I do believe it and that you love me in your own way.

He then said - well, our definition of what love is, isn't the same.

To which I responded - you're probably right.

So, Websters dictionary on line states love is:

Definition of LOVE
1a (1) : strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties <maternal love for a child> (2) : attraction based on sexual desire : affection and tenderness felt by lovers (3) : affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests <love for his old schoolmates> b : an assurance of affection <give her my love> 
2: warm attachment, enthusiasm, or devotion <love of the sea> 
3a : the object of attachment, devotion, or admiration <baseball was his first love> b (1) : a beloved person : darling —often used as a term of endearment (2) British —used as an informal term of address 
4a : unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another: as (1) : the fatherly concern of God for humankind (2) : brotherly concern for others 

My definition as I see/feel it is: strong affection, tenderness, loyalty, devotion, concern and sexual desire.

What is yours? And are you and your spouse on the same page with the definition as you both see it?


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## kcguy (Nov 15, 2010)

MarriedWifeInLove said:


> My husband said something this weekend that got me to thinking.
> 
> Our definition of love - its not the same.
> 
> ...


this is an interesting subject. What we read are different things, we have the feelings of love, the acts of love and the thoughs of love. We have Physical love. A mothers love and a Fathers love. We can even manufacture in our minds what we think is love and tell ourselves it's true. AS Human being animals, generally, it's based on what, a strong attraction to have the affection, sex, attention of one person and hopefully given back. It's something we feel that compels us to give, overlook and share. I makes us want to give of our bodies, our feelings, our trust and respect. the we hope we Honor it to the best of our ability. Then we have healthly and unhealthly love. It depends on how the person was raised and how they were taught to honor that power. What we have here in our bodies, in our minds and conciousness, is only limited to that. It's limited. 3 years ago, I had a near death experience. What I felt, that can be described of love, wasn't what i felt for god, rather what I felt from God. I felt complete and utter freedom of who I was, I was completely forgiven, I was so felt that HE was honored of MY presence, I was free. the real power of human beings. Human, is the physical part of us that comes from the universe of years of evolution and our moms and dads doing the woohoo..  I learned what were are soley responsible for the Being part. We pay for what we do here, as that seperation from the source, grows wider. How are we being while we're human, is what's imporatant. Yet we still feel pain of love, we still have human laws which we can't help. We still have consequences to our human love. I felt such love of no boundry, no judgement, there was nothing that I wasn't good enough. This is for all of us. This is to each and every person who in on this earth. I didn't have to own it, or earn it. I just had to honor it. I just have to share it here, to tap in and be free. We can tap that. I don't know if anyone can answer that until you get to the next experience and know, how you were loved.


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## TheOxRocks (Nov 14, 2010)

I know that I love someone when I would willingly make sacrifices in my life to facilitate theirs. Love to me is unconditional and works best when reciprocated between individuals. I feel that this is true for any sort of relationship; with a spouse, family member, or friend. It is the feelings of acceptance and affection that solidify connections with those around us as we seek to be cared for and have some one to rely on. When people accept one another for everything that they are, and are willing to take up their burden along side them, with full knowledge that the other person is equally ready to do the same, love can flourish.

My boyfriend has often said very similar things to me, and I have been able to convince him, mostly through actions, that I do love him and firmly believe that he loves me. I would have to agree that no two people are liable to have exactly the same conception of what love is, but as long as both parties in a relationship have an understanding of what love means to each other, and they find those definitions healthy and satisfactory, a relationship can still work and love be perceived as legitimate and satisfying.


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## MarriedWifeInLove (May 28, 2010)

"I would have to agree that no two people are liable to have exactly the same conception of what love is, but as long as both parties in a relationship have an understanding of what love means to each other, and they find those definitions healthy and satisfactory, a relationship can still work and love be perceived as legitimate and satisfying."

:iagree:


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## Trenton (Aug 25, 2010)

MarriedWifeInLove said:


> "I would have to agree that no two people are liable to have exactly the same conception of what love is, but as long as both parties in a relationship have an understanding of what love means to each other, and they find those definitions healthy and satisfactory, a relationship can still work and love be perceived as legitimate and satisfying."
> 
> :iagree:


I agree with your agree


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## greeneyeddolphin (May 31, 2010)

To me, love is accepting the other person as they are, with no intention to try to change them. It's finding their quirks and little annoying habits bearable, even if they do annoy you in other people. It's wanting to wake up with that person, go to sleep with them, talk to them, share with them. 

I think my boyfriend's definition of love is pretty similar to mine. Can't say for sure, since I can't ask him right now, but since we're still together, still in love, and making it work, we can't be too far apart in definition.


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## Pandakiss (Oct 29, 2010)

love is always making sure to say sorry and give and take thiking about someone other than your self: putting gas in the car when its too cold to be out, not eating the last of the froot loops, not vaccuming at 8 in the morning,at least once a week making their fav food,sending a little text mess just to say hey not a run down of your sucky day or to demand something be brought to you, forgiving a past grevience or strife against you by spouse, not playing the blame game or passing the buck to make them feel bad, accepting them the way their are, respecting their opnion especially if you dont agree,walking the dog every other time,stop pointing its just not nice,be responseable for your own actions if both people did a little of this less fighting and more talking and lovin might happen


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## funfun (Oct 27, 2010)

Just thought I would share this with you. It comes directly from the website 

_The 5 Love Languages | Five Love Languages

Of the countless ways we can show love to one another, five key categories, or five love languages, proved to be universal and comprehensive—everyone has a love language, and we all identify primarily with one of the five love languages: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch.

The 5 Love Languages® has helped countless couples identify practical and powerful ways to express love, simply by using the appropriate love language. Many husbands and wives who had spent years struggling through marriages they thought were loveless discovered one or both spouses had long been showing love through messages that weren’t getting through. By recognizing their different love languages, they witnessed the rebirth of the love they thought had been gone for good.

*
Words of Affirmation

Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important—hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten.
*
Quality Time

In the vernacular of Quality Time, nothing says, “I love you,” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there—with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby—makes your significant other feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed dates, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful.
*
Receiving Gifts

Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday, anniversary, or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous—so would the absence of everyday gestures.
*
Acts of Service

Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter.
*
Physical Touch

This language isn’t all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive. _


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## CLucas976 (Jun 27, 2010)

I tend to think of love as unconditional. When I love someone, I give them all of me, my heart, my soul, my mind, my time, and my body..at their disposal. I would do anything, fight to the death, jump infront of a car, whatever I had to for the person(s) I love. ANY of them. 

I am the only person I know who goes out with her friends, irrate, hurt, crushed, and depressed about their husband and still comes home with a gift for him because I knew it was something he'd like, and would make him happy.

I think I speak multiple love languages. Quality time is soo important to me when I'm actively loving, the gifts one? definately me too. I could go out for toilette paper and come home with a bagfull of stuff for him. Some of my favorite gifts weren't huge, expensive things. The birthday my husband bought me an owl cookie jar at a garage sale, a plant pot, some dirt, and a flat of petunias I was over the moon. I tend to make the person I love feel like they're my whole world, because in general they are.

Love isn't asking someone to change, or being asked to change, but changing for the better, because it makes you a better person, lover, and friend. 

When I love someone I give them all I've got, what they do with it in return, determines how long that love can last. Love supports each other, Love holds eachother through tough times, love laughs together, love can never shake that person from their mind, love doesn't judge, and love doesn't know spite or harsh words, love understands.

at least, that's how I roll. maybe it just means I'm too much of a push over and a softy, but I can't see any other way at this point in my life.


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## 4sure (Aug 8, 2010)

Me- quality time
Husband- physical touch

Love is valuing your spouse above anyone or anything else.


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