# Blind or just dumb



## bamagirl11 (May 13, 2011)

First of all let me say that I am so glad that I found this website. I am a newly wed bride that found out I was pregnant in December. 2011 roll in and my husband began to act different from what he had before. Because of this change, I begin to ask him what was going on with him. His job required him to travel alot but I noticed that he begin to go out of town every other weekend. We would tell me that he was going to hang out with friends. On valentines day, he basically told me that he wanted a divorce but because I was pregnant he wouldn't be able to divorce me until after the baby was born. he also was getting ready to be deployed in April so he said that he was going to divorce me in December when he returned to stateside. I asked him why he wanted a divorce and he made up every excuse he could think of. He said that he didn't trust me, he said that he thought I would be done with school by now becuase I was a college student. What ever he could think of, he made up stuff. As the days and weeks went by, he begin to harrass me daily for a legal separation. He wanted me to meet him at his attorney's office and sign the paper work without seeking an attorney. He thought that I would do whatever he asked. When I told him that I wasn't going to sign any papers the harrassment became more and more evident. He would send me text messages asking for a legal separation/divorce and say that it was not up for negotiation. This went on everyday. It became so bad, I wasn't able to sleep, eat nor did I have any piece in the house. The harrassment and verbal abuse got so bad and when I went to my doctor's appointment in March, I had lost 10lbs. This is not good for me nor the baby. He showed no interest in me nor the baby. I basically was living and sleeping with my enemy and didn't know it. On March 4th he asked me what was I doing at the house and if I had somewhere else to go. At that time, I knew it was time for me to go. I packed my bags and left and found me somewhere else to live. I would later find out that he was taking these 3 day weekend trips to see his mistress in another state. Someone he knew from college and someone he looked up on facebook. He basically had fallen in love with her so he had to do whatever it took to move me out of the way for her. He would leave on Wednesday evening after work and would not come back home until Saturday or Sunday. It would be a long 3 day weekend getaway with her. Once I moved out, he really showed no interest in me nor the baby. He would lie about going to doctor's visit with me but then he would come up with an excuse as to why he couldn't come. He doesn't call to check up on the baby as a matter of fact, there is no communication between us at all. I don't understand how a man who wanted a baby so badly and this being his first born would do somethig like this. Some days are good and some I feel like crying. I am trying to be strong for the baby because I want to have a healthy happy baby. How can someone just turn love off like a faucet? Sometimes I ask myself if he even loved me. There is no way you could be in love with someone else this quickly. What he is in love with is the excitement he is getting. I just pray that when he return to stateside, we can at least communicate like civil adults for the sake of the baby. It is good to know that I am not in this alone.


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## hesnothappy (Mar 5, 2011)

You are strong beyond compare...I would be (and am) crying all over the place. You will get through this without being destroyed ;o) we can all pray for that. I pray for you and your unborn, but beautiful baby to find comfort and peace.


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## DelinquentGurl (Mar 25, 2011)

Wow...your husband is a jerk.
I don't mean any offense but no "man" would walk out on his wife and unborn child. And the stress he is putting you through is inexcusable.
I'm glad you moved out and found yourself a different place to live.

Didn't you say you guys just got married also? 

I am so sorry that you are going through this.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## bamagirl11 (May 13, 2011)

Yes, we got married in April of 2010. We should be in wedding bliss but instead I am in the middle of a nasty divorce and pregnant. God is a good God and worthy to be praised. I know my end results will not be like my beginning.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Bama, you are not alone. A lot of women get pregnant and find their hubs have left the marriage for someone else, as sick as that is.

BE STRONG. You CAN do this. Thank GOD you were only married a short time where he showed you his true colors.

My advice: get a lawyer, tell his commanding officer and get support for you and baby.
TRY To stay positive through your pregnancy.

I know it hurts badly right now but look at it this way: he just did you a favor!!! You get to move on with your life w/o an idiot who coulod so callously marry and leave his pregnant wife for a Facebook floozie. She is no prize if she can sleep with a man who just got married and got her pregnant only to leave.

You deserve way better


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