# How do people co-parent?



## Special K (Jul 30, 2012)

I am finalizing my divorce with my wife. We have a 5 year old son. Does anyone use any tools to be a better co-parent? Can anyone recommend anything?


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## SoVeryLost (May 14, 2012)

Civility, respect, a shared goal for the child's well being...those are the best tools you can utilize. I have a 5-year-old son as well.
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## SoVeryLost (May 14, 2012)

I should note...my STBXH doesn't utilize any of those tools, but they're what I wish he would bring to the table in regards to co-parenting our son.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

I have a five year old son I co-parent too, i find texting/emailing of great value because I then have a documented history of every exchange, (I back up my text messages to my gmail account) What was said I can always go back and reread, plus it is easier to keep it business oriented without all the negative feelings I may have towards my son's mother. If it is something more complicated we will talk in person or by phone, but I try to summarize what we ended up agreeing to in an email afterwards.

I also used the federal guidelines for the child support I pay and harbour no resentment about the amount I have to pay despite being 50/50, and despite knowing that my ex will surely spend most of it on stupid things, but atleast I know it helps cover the actual expenses incurred for my son.

nothing else really, assuming you already have a legal separation agreement in place - mine also has rights of first refusal, so if my W is away from my son for more than 3 hours she has to inform me and allow me to step in... also a morality clause that isn't really enforceable but atleast is a good vision statement to aid in communicating and decision making regarding the child.

The best tool you can have is just to be a good father, that takes care of himself, is strong and a good role model for your son.


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