# Shy Guy



## lovelyblue (Oct 25, 2013)

I would like a guys help with my current situation.


My boyfriend of 4yrs is.

Super 
shy.
religious. 
Self-consciousness.-(cause of his weight he's a big guy)
Bashful.

I love and care for him don't care about his weight I love it actually. 

However when we try to get frisky he seems inhibited or scared into trying new things or moving further sexually.

My Q is how did I get him to understand that it's okay to try new things or go further?


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## DesertRat1978 (Aug 27, 2013)

I used to shy and inhibited in all aspects of life. In high school, I never talked to anybody, just as an example. 

He has to be confident outside of the bedroom to be confident in the bedroom. In the bedroom, one is at their most vulnerable and exposed. Some small things that can be done are working out or having him be successful at even the smallest things in life. This may be a poor example but one of the ways that I started building my confidence was beating video games. This may not work for you. 
To finish, when I started being confident I noticed that I did not stop and analyze my every move with a woman. I just went with the flow, so to speak, and it has worked out mostly.


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## nevergveup (Feb 18, 2013)

Well,have you sat him down and told him exactly
how you feel and love about him?

Guys are not mind readers and we don't know what
women are thinking let alone,even our wife.

Tell him all the things you love about him and trusting 
and patient.If he is shy,I say that you initiate
things you want from him.The worst he will say
is no.


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## lovelyblue (Oct 25, 2013)

tyler1978 said:


> I used to shy and inhibited in all aspects of life. In high school, I never talked to anybody, just as an example.
> 
> He has to be confident outside of the bedroom to be confident in the bedroom. In the bedroom, one is at their most vulnerable and exposed. Some small things that can be done are working out or having him be successful at even the smallest things in life. This may be a poor example but one of the ways that I started building my confidence was beating video games. This may not work for you.
> To finish, when I started being confident I noticed that I did not stop and analyze my every move with a woman. I just went with the flow, so to speak, and it has worked out mostly.


He was the same in HS shy and also never really talked to people.

Me on the other hand I talked a lot and hung out with people I was the same in college.

I'll try the video games or slowly taking in out to places.


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## lovelyblue (Oct 25, 2013)

nevergveup said:


> Well,have you sat him down and told him exactly
> how you feel and love about him?
> 
> Guys are not mind readers and we don't know what
> ...


You know I all ways do this and recently it's working.

Also I've just gotten him to the point of self pleasure-( i like 2 watch). I'm just looking to speed it up a bit.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

lovelyblue said:


> My boyfriend of 4yrs is.
> 
> Super
> shy.
> ...



Alot of people who are introverts/ shy are deep thinkers and readers....does he read anything? Getting him a book on sexuality could be helpful, something you both could explore together... to open up the communication... 

You say he is religious...how much of this...do you feel could be the culprit... he may feel "guilty" or shame for stepping out sexually/ having a boundary to not cross -feeling God would be displeased with him? Though generally this is pretty hard to adhere to -when the hormones start raging...many times it's a matter of "How can I hold back?".... if he is very much overweight, this could affect his testosterone levels in addition. 

Here is an article that explains some of this > The Truth About Testosterone | The Dr. Oz Show


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## bevixnz (Nov 22, 2013)

How old is he?

I think once a male matures, they care less about what other people think as they come to realize that everyone has their own flaws and issues. In my experience this can give a shy man confidence and be helpful.

The religious aspect is a whole different ball game though. :S


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

lovelyblue;5183258I love and care for him don't care about his weight I love it actually. [/QUOTE said:


> Obesity is strongly associated with diabetes, stroke, high blood pressure, heart problems, and a whole slew of other health related complications including a shorter life expectancy. Plus, overweight people tend to be rather limited in terms of their ability to perform many activities, they tend to be rather sedentary and the mere fact that they are overweight can be a sign of poor self esteem, and other mental issues.
> 
> Why do you love the fact that he's overweight?
> 
> It's just not healthy.


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