# He Oughta Know



## happyman64 (Jan 12, 2012)

Hi Gang,

What do you think of Dear Prudene's advice to this Battered Spouse about informing his Affair partner's Husband about the affair and that their is an STD that has been transmitted to her via the Affair.

Do you think Prudence gave the right advice?

Because I do not in this case.

Help! My Husband Doesn’t Want Me to Expose His Affair, but I Think I Should. - Slate Magazine

HM


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## Foghorn (Sep 10, 2012)

I don't agree with Prudie's advice at all. The Wayward's appeal, "please don't tell the OW Hubby, he might hurt her" doesn't work for me.

If he really is abusive, finding out that he's also cheating might be the tipping point that gets her out of an abusive marriage.

If he isn't abusive, and WH is using this argument to convince a wavering spouse to keep his sick secrets, then he's planning to go deeper undercover and continue the A.

I say, tell the other spouse... they have a right to know.


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## BK23 (Apr 17, 2013)

I generally like Prudence's advice, but she does seem a bit off when it comes to infidelity.


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## Squeakr (May 1, 2013)

I disagree with her conclusions. She seems to imply that the STD is not a big thing and it would already be known by the OW's H. I also believe in letting people know what they are getting into. IF the OW got the STD she could be a serial cheater and gotten it from another AP? I think that the advice is doing nothing more than taking the safe route, no matter how it affects all parties involved.


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## sang-froid (May 2, 2013)

Well, I think Prudence's assumption that the STD is a pre-existing condition in the other couple's marriage is a bit of a leap. It's quite possible that the WH could have contracted the STD from someone else and gave it to the OW and her husband doesn't know that he has it.


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## The Middleman (Apr 30, 2012)

Once again, Prudie is full of crap.


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## workindad (May 7, 2011)

Prudie missed the mark with this one. The assumption of a pre existing condition is ridiculous her husband has a right to know and to protect his health. 

The story of potential harm comes from a wayward , hardly a reliable source of honest information.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Chris989 (Jul 3, 2012)

I chipped in on the comments to this and gave up; it was either people making snide comments about the advice or even one particular woman whom had been the victim of infidelity herself and still agreed with this silly woman's advice.

Found the article quite by chance before seeing the link on here too!


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## Harken Banks (Jun 12, 2012)

Pretty wacky overall, but the STD thing is just silly. The advice columnist simply assumes that the husband knows that he is sharing sexually transmitted diseases with his wife? Couldn't the letter writing lady's husband be the source of the STD through other screwing around? And if the other woman is the immediate source, couldn't that be from her screwing around and unknown to the other woman's husband? In either case it would seem there would be an undiagnosed health risk to the other guy and maybe a moral imperative to let him know so that he can get checked out and treated. And going back to the assumption that the other woman and her abusive husband were openly sharing this disease, insn't it some form of battery for her to inflict that on this guy and maybe others?


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Prudence is an *idiot*. IMO.

She should be sued for such bonkers advice.


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## Acabado (May 13, 2012)

Space filler.


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## 3Xnocharm (Jun 22, 2012)

I agree with others, she was way off on this advice. The cheating husband is full of crap about the abusive OWH, seriously, how many battered women have the nerve to have an extramarital affair in the first place?? Too risky. And the OWH has every right to know he is infected with some funky disease, in addition to being married to a cheater.


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