# Dealing with a separation



## twinmama85

Okay, so I feel like I am in some kind of intervention: Hi, my name is twinmama85, I have been married going on 7 years, have twin 3.5 year old boys and on August 2nd, my husband said he couldn't do this anymore. He stayed in the house until September 2nd and moved 180 miles away back home, even paying his dad rent for a room. He says its over, he tells me that everything is my fault, that his life isn't where he wants it to be at because of me. There is no other woman, he is too selfish for that right now. I basically say what he is going through is a mid-life crisis at the age of 28. He has mentioned a few times in the past that he isn't living his life like someone in their twenties should and all this other stuff. I want to save my marriage, I don't believe its over, every time I ever say anything about divorce, he gets all upset about it. People who have talked to him, he tells them he wants to work it out but then says hes confused about what he wants. A little about me, I am active duty in the AF, I have no family around me, I have our sons. I have been building on my faith with God so divorce from me is completely out of the question.

Do I go dark and cut off all contact, let him contact me as he wants, or what? Any help with this conflicting and frustrating scenario would be great


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## kgirl

Try to get to the root of the problem... see what he's really thinking. Everyone's life in their 20s is different. Sounds like he's regretting missing out on some youth events or something. You have been building your faith lately... maybe, if he's not, he's feeling conviction. Which causes him not to want to give up... what?? What exactly does he want his life to be at this point? What does he feel he is missing out on, that is so important? If it is good, healthy things... are there ways you can get there together?


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## twinmama85

He has a lot of insecurity about himself. He doesn't like how his career has gone and feels he hasn't accomplished much in his life since we been married so I guess that is why he blames me; because since we've been married, his life hasn't gone the way he wanted :'( I really wanna be apart of him. I guess I just have to give him time and space and hope that he will see what he is going to throw away. I believe God will reconcile us, I truly do, but its the waiting and letting God work that is the killer on me.


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