# He cheated



## Shell22 (Dec 9, 2008)

First off I am new to this. Im only 24 and I needed a way to cope with what is going on in my new married life. I just got married 3 months ago to my best friend, the love of my life, my soul mate and everything I ever wanted in a husband. I thought everything was perfect and I was the Princess of the world. I couldnt be happier.....until.....

The day before he Thanksgiving he admitted to me that one night while at a bar he made out with some girl and she ended up going down his pants. 

He keeps telling me how sorry he is and that we have a lifetime for him to make it up to me. That is was the biggest mistake of his life and it will never happen again. That he was in the wrong place at the wrong time and having some drinks in him made him not think right. That life would end without me and blah blah blah

I know they didnt have sex and there was no emotional attachment or any of that. It was a one time thing and deep down I know it will never happen again. 

I just can't stop thinking about the fact that I just freakin got married and my husband cheated on me one month after! Im to be happy and smiling from ear to ear and Im not. Ive been so depressed. All I do is sleep. 

I know we can get threw this and we will be fine but Its killing me to know that he did this to me. Can anyone help me keep my head up? 

Thanks!!!!


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## MsLady (Dec 1, 2008)

How long were you dating before getting married?
How has your sex life been during your relationship and since marriage?

Here's the thing. This is a critical moment. If he gets away with this easy, he will likely do it again. The fact that he's using the "I was drunk and was at the wrong place at the wrong time, blah blah blah" excuse is disturbing because he's blaming what happened on circumstances beyond his control. Blah blah blah is right ... He needs to find the understanding and the language of responsibility for his action. Tons of men drink a bunch of beer and don't end up making out with some chick's hand down his pants. So this wasn't something the universe did to him. He did it and he needs to understand that. We all have alcohol and wrong places and wrong times. We must understand WHY we chose to do something when we chose to do it in order to truly avoid future mistakes.

As part of his "penance" I would request couple's counseling for at least a few sessions.

I'm sorry he ruined your honeymoon period.


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## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

Shell22 said:


> Ive been so depressed. All I do is sleep.


You sleep all day? Do you not have any obligations during the day?

If that is the case, I would strongly suggest you find some volunteer work, or something to get your mind off your own problems for awhile. 

Im sure what you are going through is really hard. He sounds very sincere and really sorry, though. Just take it one day at a time.


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## draconis (Oct 3, 2007)

At the very least he was honest with you and you know that given the situation he will always be. You might not trust him for some time but you can make it work again.

draconis


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## CONFUSED83 (Dec 1, 2008)

I say divorce his sorry behind before he has a chance to do it again. I have been going through it for two years. If it has happened once, chances are it is going to happen again


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

I would take it for what it was worth...

He told you, he came clean, so it has been eating away at him for awhile, he is sorry.

You are nboth still young, and it was a mistake. We all make mistakes.

Can you forgive him? Can you work it out? It will take time, but I think you can get by this.


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## draconis (Oct 3, 2007)

GAsoccerman said:


> I would take it for what it was worth...
> 
> He told you, he came clean, so it has been eating away at him for awhile, he is sorry.
> 
> ...



:iagree:

draconis


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