# How does God and the church deal with unrequited love??



## spunkycat08

How does God and the church deal with unrequited love?


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## Mr The Other

I write from ignorance, but....

If my unrequited love you mean a longing for closeness to someone who does not feel the same, and it causes you pain, that is not love. If you could not be happy without them or you cannot be happy without them being happy, that is not love. Love does not make any demand and brings only joy.


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## ConanHub

spunkycat08 said:


> How does God and the church deal with unrequited love?


I'm curious. Please elaborate.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Fozzy

I believe God commands us to love each other, regardless of whether that love is returned.

If you're referring to romantic love in particular, I don't believe there are any specific guidelines around that.


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## unbelievable

The Bible tells me that before Jesus' return, because of increased evil in the world, the love of many will wax cold. I think Christians, especially, should expect difficulties in their marriages and family relationships. If you were the devil, isn't that where you would attack them? 

"And then shall many be offended, and shall betray one another, and shall hate one another. 11And many false prophets shall rise, and shall deceive many. 12 And because iniquity shall abound, the love of many shall wax cold." Matthew 24:10


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## imperfectworld

ConanHub said:


> I'm curious. Please elaborate.



I second that. And count me in on any thread on this topic. Is it "limerence" or agape?

Sometimes, I think it is the finest love of all. And before you snicker, consider how often it has served as inspiration for art.


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## spunkycat08

ConanHub said:


> I'm curious. Please elaborate.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I have been reading on another forum a thread posted by someone who is dealing with limerence/unrequited love.

I was wondering how God and the church deal with this.


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## spunkycat08

intheory said:


> I'm assuming you mean God in the Christian Bible?
> 
> There are a couple of examples of people behaving badly because they couldn't have the person they wanted: ie. Shechem raping Dinah, Potiphar's wife pining for Joseph, Tamar's half-brother Amnon becoming physically ill with lust for her, then raping her.
> 
> I guess, though, it comes down to "do unto others". If the other person isn't interested in you; then you have to respect that, right?
> 
> And if you haven't yet approached them because you are so infatuated and in awe of them? Two things come to mind:
> 
> 
> You have to take your chances and be willing to be rejected
> 
> If someone truly is "out of your league" in an obvious way; feeling super nervous and anxious around them can be your instincts letting you know that you are in over your head.
> 
> People have always been fascinated with love. You may be destined to love some people "from afar".
> 
> Unrequited love is said to be the most intense and passionate. Since it is never quenched or satisfied.
> 
> If you are a Christian, you can pray for that person's spiritual and material wellbeing. That is an act of love.
> 
> We've all been there; at some point in our lives. * I hope you're not in too much pain:*|


Regarding the bolded part in pink...

I am not the one dealing with this. I have been reading a thread on another forum regarding a guy who is dealing with this. I was just wondering how God and the church deal with this.


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## ConanHub

Ok. intheory has given a couple of good examples for you.

There really isn't a lot about this in the Bible.

One person having desire for someone else is pretty basic and if unrequited, then too bad.

We are taught that we should control our desires and not vice versa.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Steve1000

spunkycat08 said:


> How does God and the church deal with unrequited love?


Keep in mind that when the old testament writings came into being 3 - 4 thousand years ago, and a large part of the new testament being compiled in 170 AD, there was not much dating going on in the Middle East. Marriages were arranged by parents, mostly fathers. Therefore unrequited love was not part of the equation.


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