# Anyone going thru divorce impatient to date?



## BeachGuy (Jul 6, 2011)

If you know anything about my story it's been a very long drawn out thing starting 5 years ago and it's been almost a year since I filed. I've chatted it up with a few women and have had opportunities to ask them to dinner or whatever but I'm still married AND living at home, so I don't. But it's really frustrating because my marriage is way long over and I really miss the companionship. My stbx and I don't speak, don't sleep in the same bed, don't do anything. And there's some really nice ladies out there.

So is it taboo to go out on a date in my situation? Oh yeah, and my lawyer died 3 weeks ago so yet another delay to the final end. And it's a really simple divorce case.


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

As far as I am concerned, as soon as you file you're free to date.

My divorce took two years and I was dating before it was final. And I wasn't even looking to date, it just kind of happened. We had been separated for three years at that point.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

I think your situation would be a red flag for many prospective partners. Many people are hesitant to date "separated" people in the first place. And one that's not even moved out yet? 

In my case, I started dating a few weeks after separating. I had told my wife I wanted out about 3 months before moving out though, so that could be considered our separation date. In any case, after a year of being separated/in the process of divorcing, you have my permission to get out there. 

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## BeachGuy (Jul 6, 2011)

PBear said:


> I think your situation would be a red flag for many prospective partners. Many people are hesitant to date "separated" people in the first place. And one that's not even moved out yet?


I hear ya but trust me, they're out there. And since I've already actually filed it's more in my favor. And I'm not really looking for a long term relationship. I just want to go out to dinner with a woman or something. Anything. My biggest roadblock is my youngest. She wants to know what I'm up to 24 hours a day.


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## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

Date. You filed and aren't reconciling. No need to tell any of them what you do every moment.


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## FrustratedFL (May 18, 2011)

This is a tough one for me and a personal decision. I posted a very similar thread and had some very strong opinions. I am very much emotionally detached from STBXH at this point and my divorce case has dragged on for a very long time. Ex wants to date but has delayed every court appearance. Classic cake eater! 

In my situation, my ex had two affairs and dated 5 years BEFORE I ever knew and before I kicked him out/ he walked out depending on who's story you are listening to. 

I personally do not want to date till my divorce is officially and legally over. Again personal choice. I would not be able to date a married man regardless of how long or what the cause of the marriage split. Maybe the infidelity has put a line in the sand where I cannot cross or my values are set in stone. 

BUT for me - The IRS, both mortgage companies, chase visa and court system still deem me married and I agree with them until I am no longer.


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

If you can find someone to date who is okay with your circumstances, then do so. You do need to be honest about those, IMO.

Of course it's better if you have you own place. I was dating within weeks of moving out. I'm glad I didn't wait for the divorce to be final, because it dragged on for seven years!


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