# Selfish Ex-Boyfriend



## favored (Aug 29, 2009)

I met this guy online 11 months ago. I broke up with him 2 months ago because he was very selfish. When I finally got fed up and told him so, he begged me not to break up with him. I did anyway. He has contacted me four times since the break-up with general messages like about current events, his job, etc. I roll my eyes and press delete without responding/calling.

Recently, he sent me a long, emotional, I messed up really bad email saying he's learned his lesson. He loves and misses me and knows he'll never find anyone else like me because he hasn't been able to his whole life. He realizes what an awful boyfriend he was and if I give him another chance, he won't disappoint me. I figure I have three choices and I'm not sure which to make.

1. Continue to ignore him.
2. Contact him and tell him not to contact me again. After all, he could only want to get back with me because he has nothing to lose and everything to gain.
3. Give him a chance to prove to me that he's changed but protect my emotions and don't give too much in the process.

What went wrong:
He loves oral sex so I did it on average 2x daily; sometimes I just did it and sometimes he asked and I never said no. He said I did it because I loved to do it. I told him no, I do it because you like it. He refused to do it for me saying he didn't like to do it. I told him that's unacceptable because I like it just as much as he does so then he would do it like once a week and even that was a half-hearted attempt and he would ask me if I wanted it like he was hoping I'd say no.

He spent a week at my place at Christmas time. I had purchased a gift for him, he gave me nothing. What loser who's single, no kids, and makes 100k annually doesn't buy his girlfriend a Christmas gift? Valentine's day? Nope, no gift then either.

The last straw was one morning I called him at 6am (he always gets up at 6:30am for work) because I was up all night with a problem and needed a shoulder to cry on. Instead of asking me if I was ok, he immediately says, "Why are you calling me so early? You know I don't get up until 6:30. Can you call me back later?" I had never called him that early before. I was too angry to tell him why I called so I just gave him half of my mind. I didn't want to make a decision in anger, so I waited a few days to calm down, told him just how awful I think he is, then broke up with him.

He did other selfish things, but I'm sure you get the idea. I forgot to mention, the whole time he was doing selfish things, he claimed he loved me.

Sorry so long; thanks for reading. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.


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## preso (May 1, 2009)

Was his name Dave?

I suggest you ignore him... he is only wanting sex at a very low cost if not free
by his actions.

Actions speak louder than words you know and his actions say
he does not really care that much for you.

Do yourself a BIG favor and forget him and stop all contact.


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## Atholk (Jul 25, 2009)

favored said:


> He loves oral sex so I did it on average 2x daily.


Best. Girlfriend. Ever.

I'm thinking this has no small part in wanting to get back together. You can try again with him, _but take it slow._


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## preso (May 1, 2009)

I want to know if his name was Dave !!!


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## favored (Aug 29, 2009)

Thanks atholk and preso. Sorry for not responding sooner-was out of town.

No, his name is not Dave, lol. Name starts with J.


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## preso (May 1, 2009)

favored said:


> I met this guy online 11 months ago. I broke up with him 2 months ago because he was very selfish. When I finally got fed up and told him so, he begged me not to break up with him. I did anyway. He has contacted me four times since the break-up with general messages like about current events, his job, etc. I roll my eyes and press delete without responding/calling.
> 
> Recently, he sent me a long, emotional, I messed up really bad email saying he's learned his lesson. He loves and misses me and knows he'll never find anyone else like me because he hasn't been able to his whole life. He realizes what an awful boyfriend he was and if I give him another chance, he won't disappoint me. I figure I have three choices and I'm not sure which to make.
> 
> ...


from what you wrote you should
1.) continue to ignore him...


its for your benefit and your emotional health
for you to do so.


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## swedish (Mar 6, 2008)

I'd be leary...You state a lot of selfish behaviors on his part and I'd probably think this is just another selfish ploy to get you back...he knows he had it made and blew it. 

It's up to you in the end if you want to try again and see if he has changed...he may be more attentive, etc. but also look to see whether he is emotionally there for you...it is important to you so be sure he has it in him to be there for you.

If you decide not to give it another try, apparently you should avoid "Dave" ?!


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## Loving Husband (Aug 3, 2009)

Originally Posted by favored 
He loves oral sex so I did it on average 2x daily. 




Atholk said:


> Best. Girlfriend. Ever.
> 
> [/I]


:iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree:


Where do you live?? J/k..


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## romeo29 (Oct 23, 2009)

Better you keep away from him as now you do...!


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## kerry5 (Mar 21, 2010)

Continue to ignore him! I wasted years in my 20's on a jerk like this. We would break up, and when he couldn't find someone else to put up with him, he would contact me, say he'd changed, and I would give him another chance. He had never changed, and chances are that this guy won't either. You sound like a very generous, thoughtful person, and there are men out there like you. Don't waste any more time on this guy because you deserve better.


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