# I have not had orgasm :((



## senorita2007 (Nov 6, 2008)

hi
I am married for 5 years and i have never had orgasm. We usually have some hugging ,kissing, stroking genitals and he penetrates and everything is over.
Now i see so many people talk about and I want to know how orgasm is achieved and want to try it too...


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## draconis (Oct 3, 2007)

First you need to relax, it will come (pun intended) but the more that you worry the harder it will be to achieve.

Second is look at the time ramping up to the penetration.

Third, how much forplay do the two of you use? Normally 20-30 minutes is good for this. Toys help too. 

Don't be afraid to take his hand and show him where you like to be touched and how. It will be strange at first but communication is important.

draconis


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## swedish (Mar 6, 2008)

Have you ever tried having one on your own by masturbating? It will take the pressure off (it can take time and practice to get there) and you will then be in a better position to know what you need when you are with your husband.


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## senorita2007 (Nov 6, 2008)

hi,
He was a very reserved kid when he was in school and totally uncommunicative. I have told him that sex is not satisfying and sometimes even painful. he just feels sorry for me. he doenst like to touch my private parts with his hands. so i can totally forget about oral sex... he is overly obssessed with cleanliness and tidiness and private parts are like a big NO to him.

how is female masturbating done ? i have not done it...


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## swedish (Mar 6, 2008)

I sent you a private message.


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## kiran23 (Sep 18, 2008)

I agree with all comments....


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

get the book "the good girls guide to bad girl sex" they ahve ti at Barnes and Noble.

This can help you achieve your goal. Best of luck


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## voivod (Aug 7, 2008)

senorita...

is your husband latino?


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## Ismile (Oct 22, 2009)

I've never actually had an orgasm during sex but can easily achieve multiple ones using a vibrator. Go to a store, explore, buy, then play. ALSO: It may be too "stressful" if he is with you the firs time you use it. Give yourself time. Learn your own body because it is great!


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## Tweak (Nov 18, 2009)

Agree with the above.

You need to know what gets you there yourself first.
You need to explore your sexuality solo so you know what makes you tick.
Relaxation is key.
Once you can have a orgasm by yourself with masturbation,you can work through his issues and get him to help work with you.(Or work on the solo and Him at the same time.No need to limit your practice  )

Make sure he understands its NOT ok to leave you hanging,women can get "blue balls" to.....in the form of resentment issues.


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