# How to SHOW a wife respect....



## akay (Feb 3, 2010)

I believe that I have always respected my wife. I respect her abilities as a mother, and a professional. I have been told from an outside source to our marriage that it doesn't convey by my actions that I respect her. I'm just wondering what some of those actions may be. The source wouldn't or couldn't elaborate any further, so ladies, what are some actions from your men that show RESPECT?


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## sisters359 (Apr 9, 2009)

Hm. Do you respect her as a person? Do you ever interrupt her, or act as if she hadn't said anything? Can you accept a public disagreement/correction (factual, not intended to embarrass you but just setting the record straight) with grace? Do you ever tell stories that you just think are funny but might reflect negatively on her (even if that isn't your intent)? Do you back up what she says to the kids and disagree with her only in private--so that you show a united front? Do you value her input on all things as much or more than anyone else (say, your parents, your male friends)? Do you make it clear in all your actions and words that you both respect and admire her-at all times, in all settings? These are just some things off the top of my head based on what I've seen men do that suggests they don't really respect their wives. Maybe the ideas will help you figure out what you might be doing differently that is sending a different message. Good luck; let us know if you figure it out.


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## Scannerguard (Jan 26, 2010)

Good question!

I felt exactly as Ajay did in my ending marriage. I felt like I always respected her position, if I interrupted, I immediatley apologized and asked her to continue, always valued her input highly, even if it wasn't always the most. 

Yet. . .and please anyone forgive me in advance for making this culturally biased/prejudiced statement. . .it's only meant to convey a point - my stb-x ranted and raved like an animated woman on the Jerry Springer show screaming and waving her finger,

"You dis'respectin' me!!!!"

(not really, but I am just trying to convey the irrationality of this sometimes)

I mean. . .it drove me nuts that no matter how much I tried to show respect, she would say she felt further and further disrespected.

Sometimes I wonder if it was a way of manipulating me. (I think it partially was and partial insecurity on her part)

Finally, we had the mother of all fights a week ago and I purposefully told her that I had no respect for her at all, that I used to have her on a pedestal and now I don't respect her at all. It was certainly meant to hurt at that point.

Ladies, I ask you to give this careful thought how you may or may not overproject certain actions or inactions by your man as "disrespect" when in fact there may be none.

I am not saying this to excuse any real disrespect. . .just widening the discussion to being secure with yourself and your role in your husband's life.


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## DawnD (Sep 23, 2009)

I am a rather uncomplicated person, and small things show me he respects me. Calling me to let me know if he is going to have friends over, calling if there is something he wants to buy to make sure we have the money in our budget for it ( things over $50), calling to let me know where he is if he should leave work to go do something, etc. Just small things. Listening to me and taking my point into consideration. But I do have to say, I expect nothing if I am giving nothing......


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