# So what now?



## vauxhall101 (Jul 23, 2017)

I'm splitting up with my wife, and this is going to cause me problems, other than emotional. I think I might be in a spot of bother, financially. 

We are living in a foreign country, in an apartment that is tied to my wife's job. I paid all the rent in advance, and my wife's salary would pay for food. Because we're breaking up, it's me who has to leave - it is wife's job, and also, obviously I'd just feel bad if she wasn't taken care of. 

I'm self-employed, and I work remotely. While I am/was living in an apartment with the rent paid, this was fine. I have some semi-regular work, and was going to try a few of my own things to make money. 

However, if we're splitting up, this puts me in trouble. I have about $2k in the bank. I have a job coming up, I think, which will pay about $1k, but I need an internet connection and a quiet place etc, and obviously moving is very disruptive. 

I have another 'verbal agreement' type of deal that supplies me with work fairly regularly for an application I programmed, that might very soon lead to some less sporadic income, a type of retainer for my services. But these things take time. I have agreed to work with them long-term (and I love doing it), but it is not a fulltime job - and it is probably just enough work that it wouldn't be possible while holding a fulltime job. 

My wife was screaming at me yesterday that her taxes are my fault (seriously, she says if she hadn't married me her taxes would be lower) - even though I paid her taxes for her, plus an extra $1.5k that I just gave her on top of that. Then there was a holiday, new TV and so on. 

But I don't know what to do. $2k isn't going to get me far, especially as I have no reason to stay in this country and want to leave. I have a perpetual fear of being homeless (I think because my parent's divorced when I was very young, and my mother was alcoholic, constantly threatening to just walk off into the night and not come back etc). I'm worried about what I'm going to do. 

As for family, my mother is dead, my father is remarried and I really can't stay with him, my sister is practically a saint, and she says I can stay with her for awhile, but she has a husband and a small boy, and I really would only feel comfortable staying with them for about a week. What few friends I have are dotted around the globe, and most of them have young families etc. I'd like to be on my own for awhile anyway. 

Does anyone have any advice? This is an added worry for me, in fact I'm somewhat terrified, on top of breaking up with my wife. Thanks.


----------



## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*I'd at least sit down and disclose all of this to your good friends, hoping that they perhaps can at least help you come up with some kind of a short-term solution!*


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

vauxhall101 said:


> I paid all the rent in advance, and my wife's salary would pay for food.


How far in advance did you pay the rent? It you mean that the rent is already paid for the next few months, have the divorce settlement set up so that she has to give you the money. If you are not living there, you should not be invested in her future rent.

what are the laws where you life. Does she earn a lot more than you? If so can you get some kind of rehabilitative support or some extra in the settlement to help you either go back to your country or move to an apartment, etc?

Could you get a part time job to help you support yourself until you increase your self employment income?


----------



## getting it together (Jun 28, 2017)

"My wife was screaming at me yesterday that her taxes are my fault (seriously, she says if she hadn't married me her taxes would be lower) - even though I paid her taxes for her, plus an extra $1.5k that I just gave her on top of that. Then there was a holiday, new TV and so on."

>>>Judging by the above, your wife is in limerence, probably phase 2. You paid and should be able to stay. Tell her you need to save up enough money before you depart. Be sure you have a time frame in mind.


----------



## michzz (Jun 6, 2008)

Can you get any credit from a bank to tide you over as you transition to another place to live?


----------

