# 10 years later......... here I am.



## AverageMoe (8 mo ago)

Most reading this will be thoroughly confused, that's my intention. I've abandoned my old screen name, and all the shame that was associated with it. 

10 years ago, my wife and I landed on here. We had issues, serious issues. Things happened, both here and at home, and **** went from bad to worse. Most on here were suggesting I leave. I didn't I held in. Eventually, things got better, but not right. 

10 years later...... I was informed last week that she was leaving..... and it hurts. She doesn't want us to hate each other, and that I'll have a better life once I've moved on. So, here I am..... again..... searching for meaning.

I have spent an hour typing, then deleting. I'm angry, I'm hurt, and I'm frustrated. I'm not here to bash her. The truth lies between the two stories as to what has happened between us. So I'm not looking for answers or reasons, I'm here for a healthy distraction to the **** show I'm experiencing.


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## BeyondRepair007 (Nov 4, 2021)

AverageMoe said:


> Most reading this will be thoroughly confused, that's my intention. I've abandoned my old screen name, and all the shame that was associated with it.
> 
> 10 years ago, my wife and I landed on here. We had issues, serious issues. Things happened, both here and at home, and **** went from bad to worse. Most on here were suggesting I leave. I didn't I held in. Eventually, things got better, but not right.
> 
> ...


Well, I’m not confused exactly.
Sorry to see you back, that’s for sure.

But you knew this if you were here before. If you didn’t fix it then, you would be back. I’m sure TAM told you that.

And now I’ll tell you this.
Stop looking for distractions.
Deal with what’s in front of you. Straight on, no turning away. She’s leaving you and that sucks but you can’t avoid it like you did 10 years ago. You even got a new username to avoid dealing with the old stuff. Come on. Do you avoid everything in your life?

You only can change yourself and how you deal with problems. It’s the only control anyone really has. So to prevent this from happening with your next love, get a freakin grip on things right now. Learn how to face challenges with determination and grit. Stop avoiding hard stuff.

Get into therapy, find a good counselor.

And get a good lawyer for your upcoming divorce. End this misery, change who you are, and build a better future. Trust me, there is happiness there if you want it.


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## Peering_Within (8 mo ago)

I'm feeling this. I have been running from this problems with us for years. I can't run forever. I hope they get tired and I loss them, but I am the one who is getting tired. Had our daughter in the middle of marital issues, and she is almost 7. I don't regret giving her life and love her tremendously. I think I need to face and leave him. It's unbearable. 

Sorry to talk about myself. I'm in crisis. I want for people to stay together. I am always sad to hear people are in your position. I will be too at some point.


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