# Abuse and lying.. And divorce



## JWilliams (Jul 2, 2012)

I wouldn't call myself a drug addict but more of an abuser. I won't lie.. I like to get high as an escape. 

Over the years I have stole my wife's pain killers and when she confronted me I would always lie. Promise to never do it again. Be good for a while and then go back to taking a few more. 

I have completely ruined my marriage, her trust in me, she resents me, always suspicious of me. 

I am feeling really low and I am to the point of considering divorce. Is it right of me to be able to make this decision because of my problems if she doesn't want to separate? 

I have no coping skills, no family and just want to stop hurting her. I have done this too many times and just cannot deal with my regrets and her distrust and resentment to me anymore. 

I'm just so lost right now and just need some advice. Without her pills she is in pain.. Really shows how much I care about her... And yet when they are around I am tempted...


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Do you have children with your wife?

How often do you take her pain medication? 

Why haven’t you taken care of your problem and stopped abusing the drugs?


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## JWilliams (Jul 2, 2012)

No kids

Sometimes 1 time a month, sometimes once every couple of months. 

I always try to not do it, but my need for instant gratification usually has the pills down, then I regret it


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

How many of the pills do you take at a time? 

What have you done to tried to stop doing this?

Are there certain things that seem to lead to you wanting to get high? Like maybe a bad day at work?


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## JWilliams (Jul 2, 2012)

2 to 3..

And it's always to just escape... Escape work, stress, etc.. 

Spent the day talking and working things out with my wife. She has always been against drinking, but have come to an agreement that when I need to escape I can have some drinks as long as I don't go over board. 

I can't believe what I was thinking... But then again I am always thinking of her and how to take care of her and make sure she is happy. 

Of course not when I take her pills then lie about it. I know I have a lot of issues still to work on, and a lot of damage I hope I can repair. 

I know I won't be able to fix all the problems I have caused, but it's just happy know she is still willing to let me attempt it.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

The drinking is an issue as well since alcohol can cause a very nasty addiction. I'm not against drinking when a person does not have issues with it. I enjoy a drink or two once in a while.

There are a few things that might help you. Going to NarAnon is one thing. It's the Narcotics version of Alcohol Anonymous.

You need to learn how to reduce stress. One of the best ways is exercise. Done on a regular basis, it works like a release valve on a pressure cooker. When you are really stressed have a routine you do.. like go for a long walk, or a run if you are in shape for that, or a long bike ride.

The exercise releases endorphins, dopamine and other brain chemicals that make you feel much much better. They are the same brain chemicals that drugs affect. And it's a lot healthier way to do this.


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