# Wife's multiple O's question



## CubsFan89 (Jan 9, 2019)

Hey ladies, I was hoping you could shed some light on this for me!

If your not familiar with my back story the misses and I were basically in a sexless marriage after our 2nd child was born, fast forward a few years later i'm at my breaking point so I stumble upon this site, post my frustrations and take bits and pieces of advice from everyone.

Basically boiled down to we were horrible at communication especially me because after a half dozen heart to heart conversations it's like we are newly weds again! It's only been on the mend for about a month but it is a completely different atmosphere then it's been for the last several years, night and day difference for the better!!

Anyway to my question, the wife and I have "fallen" into a rhythm of basically every other night [awesome!!] And things have been amazing, we finally got a night alone as my mother in law took the kids so ofcourse "it was on"!!

Later that night once we got started with oral right before we're about PIV her mom calls, 4x until she says she better answer it and ofcourse it's a video chat so now all the build up is gone as she had to at least get a shirt on [kids wanted to say goodnight].

So we start going at it again, oral, hands etc everything but penetration and just before we can start again my work calls 3x, she says I better answer because someone might be calling in and I'd have to go cover the shift. So I answer 30 minutes later i've got everything straightened out and by this point i'm irritated and flustered that not once but twice we've been interrupted so I turn both our phones off.

We start again but this time only kissing and hands, and I wanted to get started right away so I told her to go over to the edge of the bed [her 2nd favorite position] and it finally starts! I'm really getting into it [so is she] minor dirty talking and hair pulling eventually I flip her over into missionary[her favorite position] and tons of kissing nails in my back etc. And finally finish up.

Do the normal clean up, cuddle, and visit after and she starts taking about how great it was and then tells me she's never orgasmed that much, said she lost count after 8. Normally she will O at least 3 or 4 times everytime we are intimate as I can tell from body and her reactions etc.

So, any ideas what caused so many this time?? We've had nights without the kids before granted its been a while but that would never be anything like this just her normal 3 or 4.

Was it the build up? Of us getting stopped a few times? Is it we are just more emotionally connected now? I was just curious on your thoughts about it. 

Thanks for any advice you can offer!


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## Spicy (Jun 18, 2016)

Good job you stud! >


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## manwithnoname (Feb 3, 2017)

For a fee, I can call and interrupt a few times in order to build up the tension and anticipation.

Just give me your schedule.


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## manwithnoname (Feb 3, 2017)

CubsFan89 said:


> Was it the build up? Of us getting stopped a few times? Is it we are just more emotionally connected now? I was just curious on your thoughts about it.
> 
> Thanks for any advice you can offer!


To answer your question, you are right on all three. Build up, getting stopped a few times, and more emotionally connected. If she was just doing her "duty", she would have not been in the mood after the first interruption, let alone the second.

As for advice....stop boasting! :wink2:


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## CubsFan89 (Jan 9, 2019)

Spicy said:


> Good job you stud! <a href="http://talkaboutmarriage.com/images/TAMarriage_2015/smilies/tango_face_devil.png" border="0" alt="" title="Devil" ></a>


Lol thanks I wasn't really looking to brag just insight on why this time was so amazing for her so I can make sure it continues to happens more in the future!


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## CubsFan89 (Jan 9, 2019)

manwithnoname said:


> CubsFan89 said:
> 
> 
> > Was it the build up? Of us getting stopped a few times? Is it we are just more emotionally connected now? I was just curious on your thoughts about it.
> ...


Thank you for the insight, was not trying to boast in anyway lol. Just glad that we [so far] have turned things around in a positive way. 

She has definitely not done "duty" sex since we had our talks, she's as passionate as when we were teenagers! But I changed some things, like we are going on dates weekly instead of monthly, we talk with each other not at each other now, most nights regardless of sex we spend a couple hours cuddling and taking before falling asleep together. A lot of little things but had made an enormous difference!


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## StarFires (Feb 27, 2018)

Good for you, CubsFan! So glad things have turned out well.


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## WorkingWife (May 15, 2015)

CubsFan89 said:


> Was it the build up? Of us getting stopped a few times? Is it we are just more emotionally connected now? I was just curious on your thoughts about it.


I think all of that. Getting stopped and having to start up again a couple times could have really added to the build up. And definitely if you're more emotionally connected now. Trying to recreate it might not work though, sometimes getting stopped can be the end and that's that.

GOOD JOB. ;-)


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## WorkingWife (May 15, 2015)

CubsFan89 said:


> Basically boiled down to we were horrible at communication especially me because after a half dozen heart to heart conversations it's like we are newly weds again! It's only been on the mend for about a month but it is a completely different atmosphere then it's been for the last several years, night and day difference for the better!!


Don't ever forget this and you'll have her love forever. That's all most women really want. I recommend reading the book "His needs her needs" just to keep this fresh in your mind. Nothing personal, but guys have a tendency to go on cruise control as soon as she seems happy. A month is not that long. Don't let up on the heart to hearts. 

Seriously, that is really wonderful.


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## Mr.Married (Feb 21, 2018)

In our house it is called "sexual tension". The more the anticipation the higher the participation. Like coming home after a long business trip that had some hot texting while away. 
Try your best to always keep "the game in play".

If you keep her emotional mind engaged she will engage your .......... well you get the idea.


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## CubsFan89 (Jan 9, 2019)

StarFires said:


> Good for you, CubsFan! So glad things have turned out well.


Thanks star!

A lot of your advice helped get me in the right mindset. 

Who would have thought actually talking with my wife about it instead of at her about it would start the ball rolling in the right direction!🙄

Things continue to improve, we're still talking nearly every night unless I have a super early work time in which case just cuddle until we fall asleep! She has gotten night and day better at communicating with me what she wants / needs as well which was non existent before.


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## CubsFan89 (Jan 9, 2019)

WorkingWife said:


> CubsFan89 said:
> 
> 
> > Basically boiled down to we were horrible at communication especially me because after a half dozen heart to heart conversations it's like we are newly weds again! It's only been on the mend for about a month but it is a completely different atmosphere then it's been for the last several years, night and day difference for the better!!
> ...


Thank you workingwife!

I will definitely look into the book you've suggested, i've been working on getting done with a few different ones that have been suggested here on TAM.

Having that 2 - 3 hours a night where we cuddle and talk without the kids has made a world of difference! She has progressively gotten better at telling me what she wants / needs intimately and i've gotten much better at being open about my feelings instead of bottling everything up.

I realize it's only been a month and that isn't very long compared to how long we sat in status quo but I would never want it to get like it was then, especially after how wonderful it's been this last month.

Holding hands, kissing, hugging etc. In public no less [which NEVER happened the last 4 years] and she is 100% more intimate at home where she will now walk by randomly throughout the day and hug me, kiss me, tell me she loves me.

She mentioned on our date last night [which is weekly now instead of monthly] that it feels like we're teenagers dating again! I felt like I was cloud 9 when she told me that. 

Couldn't be happier at the moment!


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## Satisfied Mind (Jan 29, 2019)

It's great hearing success stories like yours, CubsFan. Your story reminds me a lot of mine. We hit a dry spell after our second child, but with the help of some difficult and rewarding communication, the last year has been a sexual reawakening. 

With young kids, we are sometimes interrupted in the heat of the moment. It used to frustrate me, but I too noticed that the resulting buildup of sexual tension definitely plays out in more intense and a greater number of orgasms for my wife.


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## MaiChi (Jun 20, 2018)

It sounds like you two needs to start doing it in hotels. Hotels are good in that if you leave the children with someone and go to a hotel, you switch off everything else and just concentrate of the one thing you are going to do in the hotel. Call the children and speak to them then continue your hotel quest all the weekend.


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## jlg07 (Feb 24, 2017)

CubsFan -- look up "edging" -- you will see why her head exploded! You can do this yourself with her WITHOUT the annoying phone interruptions....

Oh, BTW, this works for BOTH of you!!!!


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## CubsFan89 (Jan 9, 2019)

Satisfied Mind said:


> It's great hearing success stories like yours, CubsFan. Your story reminds me a lot of mine. We hit a dry spell after our second child, but with the help of some difficult and rewarding communication, the last year has been a sexual reawakening.
> 
> With young kids, we are sometimes interrupted in the heat of the moment. It used to frustrate me, but I too noticed that the resulting buildup of sexual tension definitely plays out in more intense and a greater number of orgasms for my wife.


Yes I'd agree it was difficult communication at first! Things have [and continue] to get easier for us to talk about, she is being 110% more open and vocal about what she wants[intimately]. 

It was [and still is] difficult for me to to be open about my feelings with her but i'm getting better. Or so she tells me i am anyhow! Growing up in the household I did [alcoholic mother, drug addicted father] we shared 0 emotions and we were actively encouraged to bottle everything up, so it has been a big change for both of us. 

Things continue to be wonderful right now, as I said earlier we're intimate nearly every other night, and we talk all the time now about everything instead of just the old what do you want to do for dinner, how were the kids? Etc.

If [hopefully they do] things continue like this I would definitely classify it as a sexual reawakening, she has not been this passionate since we were teenagers!


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## CubsFan89 (Jan 9, 2019)

MaiChi said:


> It sounds like you two needs to start doing it in hotels. Hotels are good in that if you leave the children with someone and go to a hotel, you switch off everything else and just concentrate of the one thing you are going to do in the hotel. Call the children and speak to them then continue your hotel quest all the weekend.


Funny you should mention that i've actually got a weekend away planned for us this upcoming week a few hundred miles away, just the two of us the in laws are watching the children. 

The misses is more excited about it then I am, which is almost scary!!😅


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