# Breakdown in communication in the bedroom



## Welshtyke (Dec 14, 2013)

I would interested to hear what people think. 

Is there a breakdown in communication in the bedroom department and beyond.

From what I can gather a lot of the modern thrillers etc. and "mummy porn" that people read are just a shagfest with a loose story line.

Obviously people are reading these novels and enjoy the sexual explicit content. But do inhibitions and too much reserve prevent turning theory into practice and couples find it hard to talk dirty to one another. When they are really dying to say to their husband or wife that they just want to shag the arse of them and do a whole host of naughty things.:smthumbup:

Is this one of the reasons a spark can go out of a relationship and why things fail through a lack of adult behaviour. Also have we all been too sanitised by the media that may stifle things.

Like I say, I am just interested in the responses, because I think it can be like a breathe of fresh air


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## usmarriedguy (Dec 9, 2013)

I don't know what you mean exactly.

But I agree that many relationship troubles are caused by poor communication. I do not think it has anything to do with modern life. If anything humans are probably improving a bit as education improves.


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## heyheyitschrish (Jan 17, 2014)

Are you saying that porn and dirty novels and stories take the flame out and breakdown communication in relationships?

If so, I disagree! I think he communication breakdown happens before the breakdown in sexual communication happens, I think it is when people stop expressing themselves or feeling confident in the marriage. Because I read stories and magazines and my husband and I have plenty of sexy books like "365 days of sex" and more that INCREASE our communication and help us experiment better and really increase the quality of the sex each time. Ask me any questions about it you'd like I can probably help in the communication in the bedroom part!


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## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

It sounds like you're asking why people who love erotica can't also get on board with dirty talk in the bedroom?

I actually don't really like reading erotica. Usually too much badly written sex and too little actual plot and character development - although there are exceptions I'm sure. I'm also not really into dirty talk. But, I think dirty talk is different from mature communication regarding sex. That can be dirty, but doesn't have to be. And people who communicate well about sexual matters aren't necessarily fond of dirty talk.


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

All I can say is this, when I lean over to my H in bed and start playing with his package, he leans back and says, found a good story tonight?

So in our case, it works.


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## FizzBomb (Dec 31, 2013)

Welshtyke said:


> I would interested to hear what people think.
> 
> Is there a breakdown in communication in the bedroom department and beyond.
> 
> Obviously people are reading these novels and enjoy the sexual explicit content. But do inhibitions and too much reserve prevent turning theory into practice and couples find it hard to talk dirty to one another.


I love to read erotica, steamy romances, literotica and it always translates into hot bedroom time :smthumbup: I don't have any reservations about turning fantasy into reality with my husband. I am the one doing all of the dirty talk and making up the sexy stories - he loves it! However, he is reticent to reciprocate - it's all good though.


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## askari (Jun 21, 2012)

Taff - not quite sure what you are saying either! But I think there is a time and a place for everything. 
Watching porn in bed with you partner can (as I remember form years and years ago) enhance what goes on in the bedroom.

I also accept that there are people (like my wife) who think porn is simply disgusting.

I have got to the stage now (late 40's) where because my wife has in effect killed my libido, that I have to watch porn to get aroused simply to jack off and clear the tubes.

So it works for some, not for others!


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