# ambivalence



## jrnyc (Jun 3, 2010)

i can't decide whether to stay or go. One day I lean one way, the next, another. What I can say is that everyone around me is telling me to get out. Is that enough reason to get out?

My wife isn't changing, and I can't say anymore how much of it is our miss-matched needs around intimacy and touch vs. our inability to communicate vs. the fact that I generally get the impression that I annoy her -- most of the time.


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## stalemate (May 13, 2010)

Making the decision to let it all go is a hard one for me too. Deep down I think this can't work out but instead of telling him that I continue to make the effort.

Both my mom and my best friend tell me that we are too mismatched and I need to cut my losses and move on. I just don't want to hurt him. He is truly a nice guy...just not the best one for me.

I don't have a good answer for myself or for you. Except I think you have to keep trying until you can honestly say you have tried everything so you have no regrets when you look back.


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## The Destroyer (Aug 3, 2010)

Wow, I figured everyone just knew 100% and that there was just something wrong with me. I sit here knowing that I should try (and I do) to save this but deeper down on my selfish side I don't understand why I should. I don't have the romantic/sexual attraction to him. He's like a friend that I can handle sometimes but that's it. 

My friends & counselor say leave that the kids will be fine. But I'm sitting here trying to figure out if my confusion is because somewhere that I haven't looked in my soul there is love to build on. I don't know what to do. 

Maybe in all of our combined confusion we can figure it out. 

~The Destroyer


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