# What does it mean when she stops wearing her ring?



## Chronotrigger

Short history: three weeks ago my wife said she wants a separation when the lease on our rent house is up. That will be in November. She insists that right now she does not want a divorce and still loves me, and has since said she feels like she's falling in love withe all over again. She's going through a midlife crisis and is fearful of turning 50. She's 47 now. She says she wants to live on her own for a while to prove to herself that she can do it. It's about her freedom, she says. She's always done what everyone else expected of her and wants to live free for a while.

Okay, fine. But she's not wearing her wedding ring anymore. And when she does wear it she puts it on the opposite hand. I want to hear from a woman's perspective what you think this means? Is it to emotionally distance herself while she figures out what she wants? Is she advertising to other men that she's available? Please offer some insight!


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## Mr. Nail

I know what it means to me when I don't wear mine. Perhaps the married and single women here will also tell me what they think it means when a man doesn't wear the ring.


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## Openminded

I’m a woman. It means she’s weighing her options (which is what you’ve been told in all the other threads about her).


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## dubsey

If you want to know what it really means, prepare divorce papers and put them in front of her. You'll have an answer in short order. Quit playing the game.


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## Chronotrigger

DudeInProgress said:


> Holy ****, I thought we finally got past all of this pathetic idiocy in your last thread on this exact topic.
> The first thread didn’t take. You asked all the questions got all the same answers and the same basic advice from everyone here - but you couldn’t seem to grasp it.
> 
> Then you started a second thread on the exact same topic, asking the exact same questions and you got all of the exact same answers from all of the people once again. This time, by the end it seemed like you were finally starting to comprehend and acknowledge the obvious reality of your situation. It seemed like it was finally starting to get through.
> 
> And now here we are with the third thread, on the exact same topic, asking the exact same questions about the exact same ridiculous situation.
> 
> if this is for real, you deserve whatever you get at this point.


Dude, I just want to know what the women think as to why a woman would do this when we are currently living under the same roof. I haven't wavered from my last post - there will NOT be a separation happening. Once the lease is up it's either we stay together or get a divorce. 

My question is why she is doing this RIGHT NOW. What's the hurry? Is it to advertise or for her own emotional state of mind?.


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## Chronotrigger

Openminded said:


> I’m a woman. It means she’s weighing her options (which is what you’ve been told in all the other threads about her).


Thank you for the reply. So in your opinion, she's still undecided. Got it.


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## Openminded

Chronotrigger said:


> Thank you for the reply. So in your opinion, she's still undecided. Got it.


She’s looking to trade up. If she can, she’s gone. If she can’t, she stays.


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## DudeInProgress

Openminded said:


> She’s looking to trade up. If she can, she’s gone. If she can’t, she stays.


Which does not mean undecided. She is very decided. She has clearly already decided that she doesn’t want you, and if she can find anything better than you she’s gone.

And even if she stays because she can’t get a better man to commit to her, she clearly does not respect you, is not in love with you, and has nothing but distain for you. Why the **** would YOU want to stay with that?


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## Chronotrigger

Openminded said:


> She’s looking to trade up. If she can, she’s gone. If she can’t, she stays.


So as to why she's doing this right now, you're saying it is so she can find a potential replacement for me to take over as her significant other as soon as the lease is up? That would indicate she's not comfortable out of a relationship and needs to jump from one man to another with no in between.


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## QuietRiot

Chronotrigger said:


> I want to hear from a woman's perspective what you think this means? Is it to emotionally distance herself while she figures out what she wants? Is she advertising to other men that she's available? Please offer some insight!


It means “I’m not committed.”

She’s ALREADY emotionally distanced herself. There is zero confusion on her part. 

It is either an advertisement of availability or a statement for her new boyfriend. Perhaps both.

She won’t even put it on the correct finger but takes the time to put it on... smh. Would you like me to hire a sky writer to spell it out? You are her distant, distant back up option if all else fails. You are her very last resort. She says only what serves to keep you as the last resort. Not even a plan B... more like a plan Z.


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## Evinrude58

Chronotrigger said:


> So as to why she's doing this right now, you're saying it is so she can find a potential replacement for me to take over as her significant other as soon as the lease is up?


she’s not wearing her ring because she wa to others to think she’s not married and approach her, or so others whom she is chasing will believe she’s separated or divorced.

she has no intention of returning to you unless she is forced to.

Your need to reconcile the obvious with your hopes—- good luck but it’s not gonna happen.


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## Evinrude58

QuietRiot said:


> It means “I’m not committed.”
> 
> She’s ALREADY emotionally distanced herself. There is zero confusion on her part.
> 
> It is either an advertisement of availability or a statement for her new boyfriend. Perhaps both.
> 
> She won’t even put it on the correct finger but takes the time to put it on... smh. Would you like me to hire a sky writer to spell it out? You are her distant, distant back up option if all else fails. You are her very last resort. She says only what serves to keep you as the last resort. Not even a plan B... more like a plan Z.


Hoped you’d read this again. Exactly correct.


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## Andy1001

Your wife has her ass in the store window and she’s waiting for interested gentlemen to sample the goods on offer. 
If she doesn’t get any or even if she does but they’re not suitable for a long term relationship she will have some fun times for a year or so but then will probably come back to good old plan B.
That’s you in case you’re wondering. 
Don’t ever be anyone’s plan B.
Plan B never becomes plan A.


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## theloveofmylife

The wedding ring on the wrong hand is code for being available, despite being married. As a woman, I don't know why she doesn't just take the ring off altogether instead of rubbing your nose in it. It's cruel behavior, especially from someone who continues trying to convince you that she loves you.

I know she's saying all the pretty words to you, but pay attention to her actions, not her words.\

I'm sorry this is happening, but you have got to stand up for yourself.


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## re16

Forget the lease, give her the freedom she wants now and show her the door, just make sure she takes all her stuff with her and never comes back.


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## ccpowerslave

QuietRiot said:


> You are her very last resort.


I think there’s a song about this... cut my life into pieces! 🎶


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## QuietRiot

ccpowerslave said:


> I think there’s a song about this... cut my life into pieces! 🎶


Suffocation, no breathing... don’t give a **** if I -

ok end t/j


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## moulinyx

Chronotrigger said:


> Dude, I just want to know what the women think as to why a woman would do this when we are currently living under the same roof. I haven't wavered from my last post - there will NOT be a separation happening. Once the lease is up it's either we stay together or get a divorce.
> 
> My question is why she is doing this RIGHT NOW. What's the hurry? Is it to advertise or for her own emotional state of mind?.


When I was on the verge of filing for divorce, I stopped wearing my ring. I felt like I had been punched in the stomach when I took it off.

It isn’t a good sign when your wife no longer wants to feel claimed. She took it off because she doesn’t want to feel married and likely hasn’t felt married for a while.


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## VladDracul

Chronotrigger said:


> Dude, I just want to know what the women think as to why a woman would do this when we are currently living under the same roof.


It means psychologically, she's already jettisoned your azz. And why shouldn't she already have something already lined up when youre out of the picture? Most folks have no trouble quickly replacing a tv or a car that they no longer want.


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## Chronotrigger

I


moulinyx said:


> When I was on the verge of filing for divorce, I stopped wearing my ring. I felt like I had been punched in the stomach when I took it off.
> 
> It isn’t a good sign when your wife no longer wants to feel claimed. She took it off because she doesn’t want to feel married and likely hasn’t felt married for a while.


Yeah. She makes no effort to hide the fact that she's not wearing it. Usually she doesn't wear a ring at all. When she does wear the wedding ring, it's on the right hand.i have no idea why she would bother at all to wear it.


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## Chronotrigger

Evinrude58 said:


> Hoped you’d read this again. Exactly correct.


Fine. She's done. You know what? So am I. I'm done. I am so ****ing done. I'm checking out. So sick of this ****. This is my second go round and both wives left me. I'm the ****ing problem. **** this. **** it all. I'm done.


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## Openminded

Chronotrigger said:


> So as to why she's doing this right now, you're saying it is so she can find a potential replacement for me to take over as her significant other as soon as the lease is up? That would indicate she's not comfortable out of a relationship and needs to jump from one man to another with no in between.


Lots of people don’t let go of a sure thing until they have a replacement. They don’t want to be alone.


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## Rob_1

Jesus: I can already see it: the wife found a new suitable dude while Chrono was sucking his thumb waiting, then Chrono's new post here: Will my wife leaving me for another guy means that this time she's really already done with me?


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## Anastasia6

Woman who hasn't read your copious other threads.

I don't wear a ring. But it isn't a statement about my husband. Yours however is different because she used to wear a ring.

I'll go with some choices

1. She has built resentment and believes she is done with the marriage but wants until the lease is up to get her affairs in order. 

2. She is kind of having a mid - life crisis or the 4 or 7 year itch. People get to a certain point of the relationship and start to feel blase and want to see if there is a thrill around the corner. This is often times paired with a spouse who is below par in their eyes. She may want to see if someone flirts and see what it's like from the safety of home.

3. She may not actually want a divorce. Has she tried to get you to listen or change the relationship is some way? She maybe feeling you aren't still committed to the relationship. Often times this is a test to see if you really still want to be married or to see if you will finally listen.

If I had a ring and stopped wearing it. I would probably mean that I was done. But each woman is different. You are her husband and you have no idea if she would 'play' with taking off her ring? I'd say that is a much bigger problem that which hand it's on.

Some people would never take their ring off, others like me don't even wear one. I am committed to my husband and have been in a great relationship for 27 years. I


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## GG1061

Analyzing this thing to death gets you nowhere. All your multiple posts, re-questioning, asking for clarification on what others are trying to say, etc. is you treading water and allowing the current or the tide take you where you're going. You'll end up with the waves slamming you against the rocks. Your trying to seek closure before the opening bell is rung. 

You have to take things at face value. Her motivation for doing things means s#!t. Her removing the visible symbol of her commitment to you and her marriage is reflective of what's in her heart. That's all there is. Don't analyze, take action. You've taken separation at the end of your current lease as decision time. Decision time can be now for your own sanity and well-being. No one here can tell you how to do it but just do something! It doesn't matter what/where you start it only matters that you start actively taking back control of your life and dictate the pace. Try to negotiate the lease for an early buyout, talk to a lawyer, demonstrate you are distancing yourself from her, etc. Taking the rings back and selling would be clear action equal to her not wearing them. Not to be vengeful but to communicate you're not willing to sit around while she gets to decide the future of your relationship.

Steel yourself and accept the fact she's checked out and let her experience what life is like without you. Yes, that means letting her take out some line to find her "freedom" which she may well do. Don't wait for her to explore her freedom. Take the initiative to start exploring yours first. Push for you to find out what it's like to live without her. When she's sees that she will either run to you or run in the other direction. You will then have your answer without waiting six months.


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## coquille

Chronotrigger said:


> Fine. She's done. You know what? So am I. I'm done. I am so **ing done. I'm checking out. So sick of this **. This is my second go round and both wives left me. I'm the **ing problem. ** this. **** it all. I'm done.


I don't think you should blame yourself for her behavior. I've read some of the posts on your other threads, and it really looks like she is looking for a free life of dating, but she is not doing it in an ethical way. She stayed with you until her son is out, and now that she looks physically better after working on her physical appearance, she wants to explore the dating world. She doesn't want to be a stepmother, but it sounds like she is not brave enough to say it to you, and also she might be keeping you as plan B in case she doesn't find better options. We don't have her version of the story, but from your various posts this is what it looks like, so you shouldn't be thinking that you are the problem because most likely you are not.


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## Anastasia6

Ok so I just read a clip of one of the other threads.

Your wife is trying to decide if her and Jim are going to get together.


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## Benbutton

DudeInProgress said:


> Holy ****, I thought we finally got past all of this pathetic idiocy in your last thread on this exact topic.
> The first thread didn’t take. You asked all the questions got all the same answers and the same basic advice from everyone here - but you couldn’t seem to grasp it.
> 
> Then you started a second thread on the exact same topic, asking the exact same questions and you got all of the exact same answers from all of the people once again. This time, by the end it seemed like you were finally starting to comprehend and acknowledge the obvious reality of your situation. It seemed like it was finally starting to get through.
> 
> And now here we are with the third thread, on the exact same topic, asking the exact same questions about the exact same ridiculous situation.
> 
> if this is for real, you deserve whatever you get at this point.


Lol, the very definition of insanity.


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## RandomDude

(Walks in) 

(Walks out) 🤦‍♂️


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## No Longer Lonely Husband

Please get yourself into a good counselor. You need assistance urgently. I say this in all seriousness. Life is to short to live in emotional turmoil. Get her out of your life and move on.


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## frusdil

Openminded said:


> She’s looking to trade up. If she can, she’s gone. If she can’t, she stays.


^^This.

Are you prepared to sit around until November waiting to see what she does? Call it now. Tell her she's either in or out, but not both. If there's any hesitation on her part, end it.


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## ElOtro

Sent her to Jim with a card saying: Do not return this to the sender.


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## Chronotrigger

frusdil said:


> ^^This.
> 
> Are you prepared to sit around until November waiting to see what she does? Call it now. Tell her she's either in or out, but not both. If there's any hesitation on her part, end it.


It's not that easy. There are financial issues involved. Neither of us can leave until the lease is up.


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## Marc878

Chronotrigger said:


> So as to why she's doing this right now, you're saying it is so she can find a potential replacement for me to take over as her significant other as soon as the lease is up? That would indicate she's not comfortable out of a relationship and needs to jump from one man to another with no in between.


Probably already found him. Check your phone bill. Like most she wants to cake eat awhile.


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## Marc878

Chronotrigger said:


> It's not that easy. There are financial issues involved. Neither of us can leave until the lease is up.


She’s already left. Wake up.


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## Emerging Buddhist

frusdil said:


> Are you prepared to sit around until November waiting to see what she does? Call it now. Tell her she's either in or out, but not both. If there's any hesitation on her part, end it.


You will take longer to adjust healthily to the changes if you do not accept that by caring less, she has taken control of how your relationship will end.

Set the deadline... as said before, in or out.

Stick to your deadlines, your boundaries, and act with purpose.

The freedom from suffering that is found will allow you opportunity to choose your future wisely.


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## aine

Hers an idea, why don’t you ask her straight up? ‘Dear why have you stopped wearing your wedding ring?’


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## ElOtro

aine said:


> Hers an idea, why don’t you ask her straight up? ‘Dear why have you stopped wearing your wedding ring?’


Good one.
Perhaps it would be even better to tell her: "Dear, may you be so kind to store my ring in the same safe place as yours? Just to be consistent with the status of a former cuple in road to their divorce"


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## Evinrude58

I thought she had moved out?


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## CountryMike

ElOtro said:


> Good one.
> Perhaps it would be even better to tell her: "Dear, may you be so kind to store my ring in the same safe place as yours? Just to be consistent with the status of a former cuple in road to their divorce"


Nah, store her ring with yours.

That way in the end, you'll have them both and can melt them into a new bauble.


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## theloveofmylife

She's wearing her ring. It's just on the opposite hand. 

I'd just ask her for it back, since she doesn't value it appropriately.


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## ElOtro

CountryMike said:


> Nah, store her ring with yours.
> That way in the end, you'll have them both and can melt them into a new bauble.


And have with me something related with her? 
In the distribution of the "shared" I was favoured with my daughters.
I never needed a coin more than that blessing.


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## CountryMike

ElOtro said:


> And have with me something related with her?
> In the distribution of the "shared" I was favoured with my daughters.
> I never needed a coin more than that blessing.


I was thinking of melting hers into part of a fishing lure, but that's just me.


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## Evinrude58

CountryMike said:


> I was thinking of melting hers into part of a fishing lure, but that's just me.


The PERFECT option! I like it. Trick unsuspecting fish with it!


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## ElOtro

CountryMike said:


> I was thinking of melting hers into part of a fishing lure, but that's just me.


With also the ring she once used? 
What about caring on the natural enviroment? Wold those fish be still edible? Or only for shark fishing?


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## Evinrude58

Chronotrigger said:


> Dude, I just want to know what the women think as to why a woman would do this when we are currently living under the same roof. I haven't wavered from my last post - there will NOT be a separation happening. Once the lease is up it's either we stay together or get a divorce.
> 
> My question is why she is doing this RIGHT NOW. What's the hurry? Is it to advertise or for her own emotional state of mind?.


It’s to show you that she feels she is not bound by the vows anymore and when you find out she’s cheating, she can pretend she explained that you were separated and seeing other people. She’s blatantly telling YOU she’s seeing other men and not worried a damn bit that you’ll give her consequences. Why ask the women? It’s obvious to everyone but you.

You can sAy you’ll divorce if she leaves...She is telling you SHE’s ALREADY GONE, by not wearing her ring. What possible excuse can YOU make for her to not wear he ring, other than to tell you and other men that she’s not married?????????????????

You’re gonna let your cheating wife walk allover you. Only you can prevent this forest fire.


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## Evinrude58

Chronotrigger said:


> Short history: three weeks ago my wife said she wants a separation when the lease on our rent house is up. That will be in November. She insists that right now she does not want a divorce and still loves me,******** and has since said she feels like she's falling in love withe all over again more ********. She's going through a midlife crisis and is fearful of turning 50. She's 47 now. She says she wants to live on her own for a while to prove to herself that she can do it. total bI’ll shut It's about her freedom, she says Truth! Freedom to be with other men. She's always done what everyone else expected of her and wants to live free for a while.
> 
> Okay, fine. But she's not wearing her wedding ring anymore. *And when she does wear it she puts it on the opposite hand*. * I want to hear from a woman's perspective what you think this means? Is it to emotionally distance herself while she figures out what she wants? Is she advertising to other men that she's available? Please offer some insight!


A quick google search provides this answer to your question: “Instead of men or women removing their wedding band to cheat on their spouse, they move their ring to a different finger on the right hand. Wearing their wedding ring on the right hand is like *some kind of unwritten code signaling that they are available for a romp between the sheets*.”

So I on ow you f dad not want to hear this, but what your wife says is diametrically opposed to what she is doing. Will you believe what your prevaricating wife SAYS, or what she DOES?
I’d go with actions every time.


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## frenchpaddy

mike93081 said:


> To be blunt, it means you are not husband material to her anymore. She is scared of being alone and wants you around until she finds a new husband.


god mick you summed that up well I like you


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## Baby Fark McGee-Zax

Chronotrigger said:


> Short history: three weeks ago my wife said she wants a separation when the lease on our rent house is up. That will be in November. She insists that right now she does not want a divorce and still loves me, and has since said she feels like she's falling in love withe all over again. She's going through a midlife crisis and is fearful of turning 50. She's 47 now. She says she wants to live on her own for a while to prove to herself that she can do it. It's about her freedom, she says. She's always done what everyone else expected of her and wants to live free for a while.
> 
> Okay, fine. But she's not wearing her wedding ring anymore. And when she does wear it she puts it on the opposite hand. I want to hear from a woman's perspective what you think this means? Is it to emotionally distance herself while she figures out what she wants? Is she advertising to other men that she's available? Please offer some insight!


Translation: I want to see if there is somebody better out there while keeping you on the hook just in case there isn't.


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## plastow

No Longer Lonely Husband said:


> Please get yourself into a good counselor. You need assistance urgently. I say this in all seriousness. Life is to short to live in emotional turmoil. Get her out of your life and move on.


she is 


Chronotrigger said:


> It's not that easy. There are financial issues involved. Neither of us can leave until the lease is up.


she is preparing while you sit and wait no guesses who will do best is there


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## thunderchad

It means your wife is leaving you and looking for someone else.


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## ElOtro

thunderchad said:


> It means your wife is leaving you and looking for someone else.


Or, by all means worst, " looking for someone else" and NOT "leaving you".


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## Ragnar Ragnasson

Chronotrigger said:


> Short history: three weeks ago my wife said she wants a separation when the lease on our rent house is up. That will be in November. She insists that right now she does not want a divorce and still loves me, and has since said she feels like she's falling in love withe all over again. She's going through a midlife crisis and is fearful of turning 50. She's 47 now. She says she wants to live on her own for a while to prove to herself that she can do it. It's about her freedom, she says. She's always done what everyone else expected of her and wants to live free for a while.
> 
> Okay, fine. But she's not wearing her wedding ring anymore. And when she does wear it she puts it on the opposite hand. I want to hear from a woman's perspective what you think this means? Is it to emotionally distance herself while she figures out what she wants? Is she advertising to other men that she's available? Please offer some insight!


Just help her move out now. Now, now, now.


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## MattMatt

Zombie Cat and Scaredy Cat are on the case.


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