# Just when I was so "Strong"..



## CLucas976 (Jun 27, 2010)

This separation has been hell. It's been on again off again plays on my actual love for my husband while he continues to act in the ways that caused me to leave in the first place.

well, now he's in another state, and we hadn't talked until he went down there and felt he needed to contact me for whatever reason. I let him go, carry on, stayed civil and friend-like.

Well, then two weeks ago we had a blow out that cemented for me, the idea of divorce. It was a light bulb. I don't need him, I don't believe in him, and he is and always will be a compulsive manipulative lying drug addict. I can't fix his problems and I'm done fighting his demons and striving to still be "worth" giving up drugs.

I am not a worthless fat ***** that just up and walked out, I am not below him, and I do not need to learn my place as the "good christian wife"

To further this cementation, i went to the doctor to find I had a bacterial infection and somehow (with not symptoms) a yeast infection. BOTH of these, and especially the bacterial come from your partner (or yourself, but I am not out hunting down new pieces of meat) having multiple partners. I suspected it, I intuitively "knew" it, but this is enough proof to me.

So here I am a new woman ready to take life by the balls again, and I really love who I am again.

last night the 17 maybe now 18yr old girl he'd been running around with, feeding drugs to, and sleeping with according to everyone but him..came into my workplace. 

I've never had that feeling before. Complete rage, anger, disgust, and INSULT! this girl look like she's strung out on heroin for crying out loud!

dumbfounded, I was floored. Just finally deleted all my pictures of us, blocked his facebook, still maintaining no contact and happily progressing to be slammed out of nowhere at work with what felt like a brick wall.

I know that i am better that her. but to have all of those comments about the "prettier, hotter, more attractive girls that treat him so much better" thrown at me, called a fat *****, told that i need to submit to my place as his wife, to then see hes ****ing a highschool [email protected]!!

five hours, five long hours I've had to think about this, deal with it, process it..I just cannot believe she had the balls to come in to my workplace. She knows who I am, because at first, I couldn't place how I recognized her OR why she was acting so shakey and jumpy and weird..

just..UGH really?!


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## hesnothappy (Mar 5, 2011)

Don't let her continue to rob you of your joy. She was trying to get your goat ;o( She has bigger problems than you can even imagine. Let go of all the hurt and pain and continue onward and upward to the good life you deserve. Have a good weekend.


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## CLucas976 (Jun 27, 2010)

Definitely good riddance.. It's just one of those "Really?!" moments.

Like, there I was donating money to my stbx for driving ten minutes out to see me because he was so "broke" and gas is so expensive, listening to his "love" for me, looking past his behaviors, and he's driving over two hours to see this chick and dump drugs on her.

I think I just needed a rant, really. It's not often I bother posting about my situation because it is so incredibly messy and stupid..but that really just took the cake and smashed it into the floor let me tell you!


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## DelinquentGurl (Mar 25, 2011)

Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission.

Don't give her that power. Don't allow him that power either.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## CLucas976 (Jun 27, 2010)

DelinquentGurl said:


> Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission.
> 
> Don't give her that power. Don't allow him that power either.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I know..

but I really don't have to be nice to the little hoe either. especially if she wants to rub her pathetic existence in my face.


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