# I feel like ending the marriage, need some advice



## TDIGUY (May 2, 2010)

Ok, well this is my first post, and first time every visiting a site regard marriage, so if I was to not follow general protocol of this site, my appologies in advance.

I have been married to my wife for nearly four years, and we have been together for 6. She is a wonderful woman as far as character, model citizen, and faithful wife, loving mom, she is the type of person that is really sweet, caring, and everything else along those lines. With that having been said that is why it is so hard to justify breaking us up.

We love each other, really we do. The romance department is lacking a bit, but healthy sex life.

So you are probably wondering right now, why the hell do you want to break up? (I am going to have to cut this post short, just got called into work) 

-I'm bored as hell in my marriage
-My wife has changed her position on several things that I find important
-My wife wants to have children asap, I do not

I really have to go now, sorry


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## lola_b (Aug 28, 2009)

You're bored? Make plans to do something, start doing date nights once a week and try and make it something different each week. Talk about what you'd each like to do (go for walks, movies, camping, theme parks, new restaurants, etc.)

People grow and change throughout life, you will need to learn how to communicate with each other to see how you can compromise so you're each happy.

You will really need to discuss having children, why each of you do/do not want children right away...discuss, don't argue. Make sure you plan out everything and tell her that too, make up a list of pros/cons of having kids asap.


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## Crypsys (Apr 22, 2010)

TDIGUY said:


> -I'm bored as hell in my marriage


So? Just because you are bored you will end a 4 year marriage? Good gravy man, WTH? If you are that bored, why don't you find something to do together? Take dance classes, take a weekend vacation? What exactly are you bored from that leaving your marriage will "unbore" you?



TDIGUY said:


> -My wife has changed her position on several things that I find important


And have you discussed this with her on more than one occasion in a rational matter? Are your position on those things so important to you that you will be willing to give up a marriage for them?



TDIGUY said:


> -My wife wants to have children asap, I do not


While dating did she ever say she wanted to have children after a few years? What is your main reason for not wanting children? What is her main reason for wanting children?


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## DennisNLA (Jan 26, 2010)

TDIGUY said:


> . She is a wonderful woman as far as character, model citizen, and faithful wife,* loving mom*, she is the type of person that is really sweet, caring, and everything else along those lines. With that having been said that is why it is so hard to justify breaking us up.


Do you already have children? I think this question is very important. If you don't, then its fine to be a sh*ty person and get out of this marriage as having children will not help it, and most likely end up hurting an innocent child when you most likely will leave her a few more years down the line. A smaller amount of pain today, is probably better than more pain in the future, plus it allows your wife the chance to find someone who may be a much better father.

If you already have children then go get some counseling and start making your marriage and life with your children better.


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