# Am I being unreasonable?



## Laura1975 (Jan 11, 2012)

I hope you are all well.

I’m looking for some honest advice please, my decision making ability seems to have gone on an extended holiday and I just don’t know what to do….

....I have been married for three years and we have a beautiful little 2 year old boy who we are both obsessed with. 

My husband was made redundant 15 months ago from a well respected managerial job that paid pretty well, when he was made redundant, I increased my hours at work to work full time while he looked for a job, he is holding out for a managerial job and one that pays a good salary, which I was happy to support as were sensible with our money and can afford the luxury of waiting for the job that he wants…however, after a year of this, the resentment started to build within me (I like to think I was really supportive for that year), so I dropped some hours at work so that I could spend some time with our baby (I miss him terribly), so we then had a situation where he wasn’t earning and I was now on part-time hours (although, I still work 32 hours and what I earn covers the bills).

Anyway…to cut a veeerrryyyy looooonnnnggg story short, I snapped at him last night, he is cutting himself off from his friends and he has no other interests other than our son, I understand that his pride has taken a bashing by being made redundant but how long is this to go on, I would really like my son to have a brother or sister and that is put on hold until he gets a job, I’m 36 so don’t have the luxury of waiting for years. I find his lack of drive to do other things (meet with friends, do a college course...etc) very unattractive and I’m losing respect for him but I love him but I need to know when things are going to change and he doesn’t give me any reassurance. Also, because he doesn’t go anywhere without me, I feel like I’m suffocating, I get no time in the house to myself, I do have other interests outside of the home, book club etc but I would just like an evening in the house on my own (with my son) but I never get it and it’s driving me mad. 

I have a lot of things on sky+ that my hubby refuses to watch (too girly) so I never get to just watch what I want, I have asked for time to myself and he promises me that I’ll get it, but then he says he doesn’t know where to go when it’s dark then I feel sorry for him and don’t say anything until it all bubbles up again and becomes a vicious circle….

Oh – just a quick background info, my husband and I have had very different upbringings, he had a very privileged upbringing with private schooling etc and is very driven by money and status, and I have had the exact opposite, I am not driven by money at all, I just want us both to get back to our lovely family life that we had before this anger built up in me.
Thanks for reading this far….
Laura


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