# Anyone here not like their husband performing oral sex on them?



## Happilymarried25

I really enjoy when my husband goes down on me mainly because it's the only way I can have an orgasm. It really surprises me when I read posts from husbands here that their wives don't like them going down them and no surprise most of those women don't enjoy having sex and don't have orgasms through PIV. I think that if they would let their husbands go down on them, they would have an orgasm and enjoy sex more. 

Does anybody here not enjoy their husband going down on them?


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## CatJayBird

*crickets*


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## richardsharpe

Good evening
My wife enjoys when I do it, but only for a sort of warm-up. She doesn't generally like to orgasm that way - takes to long for her.


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## Lila

I'm neutral about oral sex on me. It's not at the top of my favorites list but it's not something I'd reject either. It's just there. I much prefer manual attention  Way easier to achieve orgasms this way for me and much stronger too.


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## arbitrator

*Let's just say that in my advanced state of dotage, oral, more especially the lack thereof, is a definite deal-breaker inasfar as propagating a new relationship with a woman that I would care to fall in love with!

With regard to performance on her, there is almost as much there for her in being the recipient as there is for me as the provider! To up and say "no" to oral out of some social or quasi-religious fear just doesn't cut it! And the very same holds true inasfar as her performance of oral on me!

In addition to the fact that there are some validations out there, greatly to the effect that there are natural instinctive tendencies associated with oral, I truly believe that oral should be done to your partner preemptively out of the goodness and passion of ones heart!

And for that, the element of fear should never be entertained or entered into the equation! *
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## EllisRedding

I always thought my wife was somewhat indifferent to it. Of late though I have tried to put more emphasis on it and expand my toolbox from reading some books. Now it definitely seems like she has no issues sitting back and enjoying the ride for as long as it goes. 

Here is the problem though, I don't like to share my chapstick (in general I don't like to share waterbottles, utensils with kids, etc...). A few nights ago she couldn't find her chapstick so she used mine. I gave her my most sinister look to show displeasure, but of course she hit me up with the fact I had no problems setting up camp down south so how could I seriously mind if she used my chapstick. I have created a monster :soapbox:

IDK, maybe my sinister look isn't that sinister. I am starting to think it is more "Blue Steel" than Evil Super villain


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## Fozzy

EllisRedding said:


> I always thought my wife was somewhat indifferent to it. Of late though I have tried to put more emphasis on it and expand my toolbox from reading some books. Now it definitely seems like she has no issues sitting back and enjoying the ride for as long as it goes.
> 
> Here is the problem though, I don't like to share my chapstick (in general I don't like to share waterbottles, utensils with kids, etc...). A few nights ago she couldn't find her chapstick so she used mine. I gave her my most sinister look to show displeasure, but of course she hit me up with the fact I had no problems setting up camp down south so how could I seriously mind if she used my chapstick. I have created a monster :soapbox:
> 
> IDK, maybe my sinister look isn't that sinister. I am starting to think it is more "Blue Steel" than Evil Super villain


On a side note--notice how Lionel Richie is also giving a "Blue Steel" in your avatar shot?


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## arbitrator

*Hey, @Ellis! With a loving spouse and the sharing of mind-blowing sex, the spousal sharing of Chap-Stick is absolutely nothing!

Just what on God's green earth are you gritching about?
*
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## EllisRedding

Fozzy said:


> On a side note--notice how Lionel Richie is also giving a "Blue Steel" in your avatar shot?


Lol, makes sense that I am drawn to those, especially since I have been giving the blue steel look since this photo of me as a baby was taken ...












arbitrator said:


> *Hey, @Ellis! With a loving spouse and the sharing of mind-blowing sex, the spousal sharing of Chap-Stick is absolutely nothing!
> 
> Just what on God's green earth are you gritching about?
> *
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I don't remember agreeing to sharing a chap stick as part of our nuptials, it was definitely never discussed in those pre cana classes back in the day. Just another classic case of bait and switch ... >


OK, sorry, I have single handedly destroyed this thread ... :redcard::rules::banhim:


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## sixty-eight

CatJayBird said:


> *crickets*


:lol:

I didn't like it toward the end of my marriage, because stbx said that he didn't like giving oral. That it was "gross". Not just me, but in general.

I don't want anyone doing that, that isn't enjoying themselves. If i have to think about someone hating it but sacrificially doing it anyway, it's a turn off.


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## Fozzy

My wife didn't like it for the longest time, but has been slowly warming to it in recent years.


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## happy2gether

my wife loves it, and often gets it. I've never been with a woman that did not like it, but I have heard a few say they don't. Honestly I think most of those are because they have never had it done or done properly!


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## bandit.45

sixty-eight said:


> :lol:
> 
> I didn't like it toward the end of my marriage, because stbx said that he didn't like giving oral. That it was "gross". Not just me, but in general.
> 
> I don't want anyone doing that, that isn't enjoying themselves. If i have to think about someone hating it but sacrificially doing it anyway, it's a turn off.


Don't know you, but I would venture to guess you are physically not gross in any way. That is just one more hangup in a long line of hangups your husband seems to have. The more you talk about him the less and less I like him.


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## bandit.45

I enjoy giving a woman oral more than I like getting BJs. I have never been with a woman who did not like me going down on her.


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## arbitrator

*In a nutshell, oral should be equally fun for both the giver and the receiver! 

And you'll have yourself one a hell of a time convincing me that it's not the way that it was fully intended to be!*
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## soccermom2three

I can't imagine not liking it.


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## sixty-eight

bandit.45 said:


> Don't know you, but I would venture to guess you are physically not gross in any way. That is just one more hangup in a long line of hangups your husband seems to have. The more you talk about him the less and less I like him.


yeah, he's a putz. If it helps you bandit, i don't like him either .
I'm not gross, but when you've only had one partner, stuff like that cuts deep, you have no frame of reference. Which is likely why he said it. 
The funny thing is, is that he only shows his true colors to family (traditionally true for NPDers).

He is well liked at work and among friends. A master manipulator, the boss at work that's on top of everything. He comes home and cries(literally, with tears) that they don't really like him, are just pretending. I have no doubt that he has talked me down to everyone he knows, playing the victim. Ie: He tells people that i don't want to work, when in reality, he won't let me go on interviews, has moved me away from good jobs that i've had, away from where good jobs are, and can't be trusted to watch the kids. If you met him, you might like him. That's just the way of things sometimes.

He managed to charm my dad and my brothers after a while, and they knew he beat me, broke my thumb in a rage. He convinced them that i was overreacting, and that he was reformed. Snake in the grass.


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## bandit.45

sixty-eight said:


> yeah, he's a putz. If it helps you bandit, i don't like him either .
> I'm not gross, but when you've only had one partner, stuff like that cuts deep, you have no frame of reference. Which is likely why he said it.
> The funny thing is, is that he only shows his true colors to family (traditionally true for NPDers).
> 
> He is well liked at work and among friends. A master manipulator, the boss at work that's on top of everything. He comes home and cries(literally, with tears) that they don't really like him, are just pretending. I have no doubt that he has talked me down to everyone he knows, playing the victim. Ie: He tells people that i don't want to work, when in reality, he won't let me go on interviews, has moved me away from good jobs that i've had, away from where good jobs are, and can't be trusted to watch the kids. If you met him, you might like him. That's just the way of things sometimes.
> 
> He managed to charm my dad and my brothers after a while, and they knew he beat me, broke my thumb in a rage. He convinced them that i was overreacting, and that he was reformed. Snake in the grass.


Well, I would imagine that physically there is nothing repulsive about you. He's just got serious hangups all around and I'm glad you are separating from him. Divorce and find yourself a man who wants to please you.


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## Spotthedeaddog

One couple I was dating, she didn't like receiving oral because some kids at her school had convinced her to let them do it to her when she was 14-15, and then told everyone. The experience "felt weird" and she would get flashbacks.

Another just considered her Vulva to be a dirty place and couldn't handle the idea of someone putting their face there. This was definitely not helped when a older controlling first serious befriend kept insisting on kissing her after going down on her (and neither of them considered showering first). She was also so naive that she just thought "sex was something she was supposed to "do for him"" so just lay there/did what ever he told her (and only that) so never even thought to mention that the kiss afterwards was unpleasant for her - as it had never occurred to her that it wasn't all supposed to be unpleasant.

A friends gf confided she didn't enjoy it, simply because it felt weird with a person sticking their head in her crouch. Although in this case the woman was rather confined/conservative in her thinking.


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## Nynaeve

I don't dislike it but I also don't prefer it. I always imagined I'd like it before I got it. Turns out it doesn't live up to my imaginings.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## lucy999

It feels great but im very hard to O. Takes a tremendous amount of time, concentration, and all the stars have to be in alignment lol. That said, I really have no issue that I don't O on the regular. Its not the holy grail for me.its too much pressure on me to O when my bf goes down south. He then kind of feels like a failure when I don't and I don't see it that way at all. It all feels good. Tbh I get way more excited when I'm going down on him.


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## Darwin17

My wife doesn't like it. I love to give it and she has told me if feels good. She still doesn't like it.


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## SimplyAmorous

Happilymarried25 said:


> I really enjoy when my husband goes down on me mainly because it's the only way I can have an orgasm. It really surprises me when I read posts from husbands here that their wives don't like them going down them and no surprise most of those women don't enjoy having sex and don't have orgasms through PIV. I think that if they would let their husbands go down on them, they would have an orgasm and enjoy sex more.
> 
> *Does anybody here not enjoy their husband going down on them?*


Sex researchers claim somewhere around 30% of women have orgasms through PIV... and it's at a much higher rate to have an orgasm through oral sex.. 

I am one of those women who ONLY seem to have an orgasm through PIV.. only twice in my life , that I can remember did I get off by oral.. I know my husband would love it if this happened more often... as it's one of his favorite things to do...

In our earlier years.. he kept trying to go there.. but between hang ups I had (do I smell,







how can he stand [email protected]#$ my mind was in over drive & it seemed SO SENSITIVE !..plus I just didn't get off like that !)... so I never much cared for it... 

I'm sure ...If I was orgasmic...those hang ups would have flown out the window though! .... I have gotten over these silly hang ups ...and now very very much enjoy the foreplay of it... in fact I'd probably be upset if he didn't want to go there.. so I've grown in enjoying "cunnilingus"....

But ultimately I want the Rod ! 

I found this article about how Women feel about oral sex.. and men feel too..



> *Ladies thoughts on being done orally by their husband*:
> 
> *36%* like how excited their husband gets by doing it. She enjoys you enjoying it – and it probably makes her feel less selfish about it. If you like it, let her know how much you like it!
> 
> *36%* like it as foreplay, but would rather finish with intercourse. Most women like intercourse (Even among those who never climax from it, most feel a need for it.) If you want to do oral on her, make it clear it’s her choice how things end.
> 
> *25%* are only open to it if they just showered
> 
> *17% *can’t understand why he is willing to do it, and
> 
> *8%* say they feel gross when he does it. This is a major block to women accepting oral sex, and to enjoying it if they do accept it. Work to convince her you do not find it gross, but actually enjoy it (see the men’s stats below for help with that). Thinking back, my husband was too darn quiet here, had he been more vocal with his excitement, sharing how much he WANTED IT ..I think I might have gotten over my hangs ups quicker ...
> 
> *18%* said it was their favorite sex act. You need to know if your bride is one of these, and if she is make oral part of most sex acts.
> 
> *13%* like to climax orally if he finishes before she does during intercourse. Don’t make her ask, go for it.
> 
> *10%* say they don’t get oral nearly as often as they would like.
> 
> *11% *enjoy oral, but can’t climax from from it. If she can’t get there from oral, give her some pleasure then move on. Don’t make it a point of pride!
> 
> *8% *said it’s the only sure way they can climax, and *4%* said it’s the only way they can climax at all.





> *The men’s thoughts on doing their wife*
> 
> *45%* of men love the smell/taste, and another *34%* like it.
> 
> That means *79% *of men ENJOY how a woman’s genitals taste and smell. What’s more, only *4%* said they dislike the smell/taste.
> 
> *66%* of men say doing it turns them on. Only *2%* said they do it but don’t like it. So it’s not “just for her” – he enjoys it.
> 
> *14%* want to try, but are told no.
> 
> *10%* would like to do it to orgasm, but she says no. Only* 6%* like to do it but don’t want to finish her that way. Ladies, don’t feel selfish, he wants to!


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## Spotthedeaddog

One female partner said that when receiving oral if she climaxed it often didn't feel as satisfying since there was nothing inside to squeeze on.
To assist with this I either used vibrators or fingers part-or-last into the piece to push her over the edge. This can be effective using both hands to stimulate her erective tissues around her mons, and also various areas in and around the pubic bone. Do have to be careful on positioning as she did dislocate two of my fingers at one point.

Others not so responsive, one because she liked to tease and be in control, another because she liked the pressed feeling of someone on top of her squashing her down.
Others looking for more specific technical stimulations, so if they climaxed during oral they would get irritated.


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## GusPolinski

Mrs. Gus loves it.

I _love *Love** LOVE*_ it.


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## joannacroc

It was something I instantly loved and still do. I don't understand viewing it as something dirty, but then I didn't have a particularly religious background. I'm sure if you're raised viewing sex or certain acts as dirty or wrong, it's hard to enjoy them.


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## Lila

lucy999 said:


> It feels great but im very hard to O. Takes a tremendous amount of time, concentration, and all the stars have to be in alignment lol. That said, I really have no issue that I don't O on the regular. Its not the holy grail for me.its too much pressure on me to O when my bf goes down south. *He then kind of feels like a failure when I don't and I don't see it that way at all.* It all feels good. Tbh I get way more excited when I'm going down on him.


In my case, it's not a lack of concentration but rather over-sensitivity down there. From conversations with my h and other men, the feelings I experience from direct contact on my clitoris can best be described as the over-sensitivity that a man feels on his penis post orgasm. Too much stimulus. Once I explained this to my H, he understood and didn't take the lack of O from oral personally. 

Is there anything you do for your bf that can be used for comparison purposes? Sometimes putting things in their terms helps to push past the communication barrier.


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## farsidejunky

happy2gether said:


> my wife loves it, and often gets it. I've never been with a woman that did not like it, but I have heard a few say they don't. Honestly I think most of those are because they have never had it done or done properly!


This. I broke up with the one girl I dated that didn't like it.

It was not specifically for that reason, but it was definitely one more thing that just wasn't right.

And I agree with Bandit that 7 out of 10 days I would rather give that to her rather than receive it from her.

I think most days she could take it or leave it to be honest. She prefers PIV.

Sent from my SM-N910V using Tapatalk


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## Ynot

First GF loved it. Second GF hated it and said it was gross the one time I went down on her. Ex did not like it and thought it was gross, she seldom allowed it. Rebound enjoyed giving and receiving and had no hang ups about kissing afterwards or performing it after PIV.


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## Reaper39

My wife has always enjoyed it and I love performing oral sex on her. I enjoy it most after she climaxes but she feels sensitive.


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## bandit.45

WARNING: EXPLICIT.....


I was doing it wrong for a long time. What I did not know is that you don't lick pvssy. You suck pvssy. The clitoris is essentially a teeny-tiny penis with the same amount of nerve endings in it that a guy has in his entire penis. Licking the vulva can feel good but it doesn't get a woman off. Like many guys I went down there with my tounge flapping about like a thirsty dog...lapping and flicking...

Well that doesn't work. All it does is make her feel weird...like she has a lapping, licking dog down there. What I found is that you have to make a big O with your mouth, and basically take in her whole pubic mound in your mouth and kind of latch yourself on like a remora. Keep a steady suction while use use the flat of your tongue, not the tip, to rub her clitoris lightly at first then progressively more pressure and speed as she begins to build towards orgasm. Spell the alphabet out with the flat of your tongue. Stay on that clit. Now, don't do it hard at first...go very very lightly and then as she squirms and moans and you watch her body, you can increase the pressure and speed of your tongue.

Most of the time this works pretty well at bring her to an O. Experiment. Remember...always ease into it. 

There.... Bandit's cunninlingus 101.


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## SecondTime'Round

bandit.45 said:


> WARNING: EXPLICIT.....
> 
> 
> I was doing it wrong for a long time. What I did not know is that you don't lick pvssy. You suck pvssy. The clitoris is essentially a teeny-tiny penis with the same amount of nerve endings in it that a guy has in his entire penis. Licking the vulva can feel good but it doesn't get a woman off. Like many guys I went down there with my tounge flapping about like a thirsty dog...lapping and flicking...
> 
> Well that doesn't work. All it does is make her feel weird...like she has a lapping, licking dog down there. What I found is that you have to make a big O with your mouth, and basically take in her whole pubic mound in your mouth and kind of latch yourself on like a remora. Keep a steady suction while use use the flat of your tongue, not the tip, to rub her clitoris lightly at first then progressively more pressure and speed as she begins to build towards orgasm. Spell the alphabet out with the flat of your tongue. Stay on that clit. Now, don't do it hard at first...go very very lightly and then as she squirms and moans and you watch her body, you can increase the pressure and speed of your tongue.
> 
> Most of the time this works pretty well at bring her to an O. Experiment. Remember...always ease into it.
> 
> There.... Bandit's cunninlingus 101.











Sent from my SM-G920V using Tapatalk


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## SimplyAmorous

bandit.45 said:


> WARNING: EXPLICIT.....
> 
> What I found is that you have to make a big O with your mouth, and basically take in her whole pubic mound in your mouth and kind of latch yourself on like a remora....
> 
> There.... Bandit's cunninlingus 101.


 Oh that was goooood...I was laughing out loud.. had to share this with my husband .. reading for Effect.. never heard of a Remora... oh the sucker Fish -- of course !


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## 3Xnocharm

I can take it or leave it. Not sure exactly WHY. I have had partners who were horrible at it and I hated it, and others that were masters and I loved it. But still...eh...its really not something I crave. I enjoy giving oral much more than receiving. I'd rather have the d!ck, LOL!


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## Hope Shimmers

bandit.45 said:


> WARNING: EXPLICIT.....
> 
> 
> I was doing it wrong for a long time. What I did not know is that you don't lick pvssy. You suck pvssy. The clitoris is essentially a teeny-tiny penis with the same amount of nerve endings in it that a guy has in his entire penis. Licking the vulva can feel good but it doesn't get a woman off. Like many guys I went down there with my tounge flapping about like a thirsty dog...lapping and flicking...
> 
> Well that doesn't work. All it does is make her feel weird...like she has a lapping, licking dog down there. What I found is that you have to make a big O with your mouth, and basically take in her whole pubic mound in your mouth and kind of latch yourself on like a remora. Keep a steady suction while use use the flat of your tongue, not the tip, to rub her clitoris lightly at first then progressively more pressure and speed as she begins to build towards orgasm. Spell the alphabet out with the flat of your tongue. Stay on that clit. Now, don't do it hard at first...go very very lightly and then as she squirms and moans and you watch her body, you can increase the pressure and speed of your tongue.
> 
> Most of the time this works pretty well at bring her to an O. Experiment. Remember...always ease into it.
> 
> There.... Bandit's cunninlingus 101.


Wish every guy in the world would read and implement this.

Really nothing more to say. :smile2:


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## Marc878

Damn, all this time I thought it was mandatory!!!!!!

Seriously, it's the easiest, fastest way to give an O.

Then it's my turn whatever I want. Uh huh


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## arbitrator

SecondTime'Round said:


> View attachment 41210
> 
> 
> Sent from my SM-G920V using Tapatalk


*And as far as what that gal will be having for dinner, well let's just say that I think that she'll have what Bandito's girlfriend is already having!*
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Faithful Wife

bandit.45 said:


> Well that doesn't work. All it does is make her feel weird...like she has a lapping, licking dog down there. What I found is that you have to make a big O with your mouth, and *basically take in her whole pubic mound in your mouth and kind of latch yourself on like a remora. Keep a steady suction* while use use the flat of your tongue, not the tip, to rub her clitoris lightly at first then progressively more pressure and speed as she begins to build towards orgasm.


This wouldn't work on me. Every once in awhile a full mouthed suction like that feels good a few times like a tease. But the constant suction wouldn't feel good (have tried it).

I like receiving oral sex but it leaves me in a quite passive state and that ends up being boring to me. I find myself getting distracted out of sheer loneliness...I get jealous of my kitty because she's getting all of his attention and here's the rest of my entire body wishing for it, too. 

Though we do do it (he he, I said do do) and we both love it, I tend to not want it that often because of the loneliness factor.

Like Lila said (I think it was Lila) I seem to have an over sensitivity issue as well, and at different times, it sometimes actually hurts and causes shooting firey pain across my body. Could be nerve damage, I don't know. But I have had these feelings since being a very young girl and during a masturbation experiment gone wrong, I may have caused this nerve damage. (Don't ask). I don't know if that is when these feelings started or not so I just don't know what the issue is. Thankfully the way I am built, I am usually well protected from over stimulation. Only when a tongue or finger gets right directly on it and only at certain times, do I get those jolts of firey pain. Other times it feels like heaven. I never know until we start.


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## bandit.45

I've been lucky in that the partners I have had seemed to enjoy my way of doing it. 

But I fully understand that all women are different. No two women respond to the same technique. I predict that one day I will strike out badly and slither away in disgrace. 

I think it behooves us men to be sensitive and really pay attention to how our partners are responding. If a gal is just laying there and nothing you are doing seems to be making her moan or squirm, then it's time to talk to her and ask her what she needs. Sometimes they want digital stimulation, sometimes they want PIV, and sometimes they want to talk.


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## EllisRedding

Following up on FW in terms of boredom/loneliness, I actually prefer to go back and forth between oral, PIV, other foreplay for that reason. My wife seems to enjoy it that much more, and her entire body gets full attention instead of just her "meat wallet".

Also, oral too long honestly is fatiguing and at times difficult to get comfortable with (I am rather muscular so this keeps me propped up a bit higher than where my wife would be laying down and can get uncomfortable after a while).


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## TeddieG

EllisRedding said:


> I always thought my wife was somewhat indifferent to it. Of late though I have tried to put more emphasis on it and expand my toolbox from reading some books. Now it definitely seems like she has no issues sitting back and enjoying the ride for as long as it goes.
> 
> Here is the problem though, I don't like to share my chapstick (in general I don't like to share waterbottles, utensils with kids, etc...). A few nights ago she couldn't find her chapstick so she used mine. I gave her my most sinister look to show displeasure, but of course she hit me up with the fact I had no problems setting up camp down south so how could I seriously mind if she used my chapstick. I have created a monster :soapbox:
> 
> IDK, maybe my sinister look isn't that sinister. I am starting to think it is more "Blue Steel" than Evil Super villain


Yeah, sorry dude, it is REALLY hard for me to take Ben Stiller seriously.


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## EllisRedding

TeddieG said:


> Yeah, sorry dude, it is REALLY hard for me to take Ben Stiller seriously.


In all fairness i think Blue Steel works better than White Goodman lol


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## TheCuriousWife

Lila said:


> I'm neutral about oral sex on me. It's not at the top of my favorites list but it's not something I'd reject either. It's just there. I much prefer manual attention  Way easier to achieve orgasms this way for me and much stronger too.


:iagree:

I'm on the fence about it. I used to love it. But when we were just learning husband made some "joking" comments about smell and taste. Also it took him a while to agree to do it, with the insinuation that it was gross or icky. Despite me giving him a blow job on the first day. Years later, I still haven't been able to let that go completely. 

I've never had an orgasm from it. Husband doesn't stay down there long enough / isn't skilled enough, and I'm not relaxed enough.

Sometimes it bothers me when he does oral and then comes up to kiss me. I'm not sure why. Most times I taste/smell fine, but occasionally it does bother me. Mostly because I let my mind get the best of me, or perhaps there will be a faint scent that just puts me off. (Not necessarily a bad smell) I'm also put off by bad breath in general.

I do try to enjoy it, and usually it is done for a just few minutes to warm me up. I much prefer it to include fingers. I need more stimulation, or perhaps it could just be my husband's ability is lack luster. So in general I prefer manual stimulation. Although I will confess that I have often imagine an awesome session of oral sex, complete with a toe curling orgasm. Unfortunately, the reality is that it never seems as good as I wish it to be.

I would say my oral experiences mostly equate to a "lapping, licking dog down there." Complete with slurpy sounds.


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## SurpriseMyself

happy2gether said:


> my wife loves it, and often gets it. I've never been with a woman that did not like it, but I have heard a few say they don't. Honestly I think most of those are because they have never had it done or done properly!


This! If a man knows what he's doing, it's great. If he's down there just lapping without a clue, it's like a bad blow job.


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## knobcreek

My wife loves it but she always thinks she needs to be shaved up and fresh out of the shower for her to relax enough to enjoy it, when really I don't care at all, I've never had a bad experience down there. Now I just kinda force the issue a bit when she protests about "not showered yet" or something else, 3 seconds later she's OK with it.

Sex isn't the same unless I go down on her, it also makes me go into sexual overdrive. I love it.


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## alltheprettyflowers

I prefer getting my ass licked while I masturbate.


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## SecondTime'Round

alltheprettyflowers said:


> I prefer getting my ass licked while I masturbate.


That would not turn me on at all. I poop from there. Gross.

Sent from my SM-G920V using Tapatalk


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## alltheprettyflowers

SecondTime'Round said:


> That would not turn me on at all. I poop from there. Gross.
> 
> Sent from my SM-G920V using Tapatalk


But you wont be the one licking it. So why is that gross?


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## richardsharpe

something can be gross even if you are the recipient. My wife thinks its gross, but finds it very physically pleasurable. 







alltheprettyflowers said:


> But you wont be the one licking it. So why is that gross?


----------



## SecondTime'Round

alltheprettyflowers said:


> But you wont be the one licking it. So why is that gross?


My empathy would prohibit my ability to get pleasure out of it.

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## youngmama

Oral is a total turn off to me. I'd rather have hands... hate his face down there. Ew.

Sent from my SM-G925V using Tapatalk


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## Kev88

My W is in the camp of "Please, no!". She willingly, if not enthusiastically, will give me head, usually to completion in her mouth (spit, not swallow). But, she insists that she doesn't enjoy receiving oral. I've pushed the issue a few times in 35 years of marriage, *once* I believe she orgasmed, but I'm not even sure of that.

Orgasms for her are typically 1/4 of the time, mostly PIV with me providing manual stimulation; so she's not anorgasmic, just indifferent. If she's come in the past couple of weeks, she is more likely to just take care of me by uninterested intercourse or oral (which I truly know is a blessing, but still, something is lacking).

Bottom line is that, perhaps intimidated by statistics that "all women love oral", I feel it must be a reflection on my skills. It's helpful to read - not a lot, but a few - that there are other women here who share her attitude. But, that's not to say I won't be trying Bandit's tips at the next opportunity.
>

As I write this, one other factor comes to mind: as I get older and I require more stimulation, part of this desire for my wife is selfish because getting her off is a sure-fire stimulant for me.


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## FrazzledSadHusband

Does he know you would like it more?? Make his day, some night when you guys get home from work, tell him to get on his knees NOW and give you a good licking!

(lucky ******)


----------



## FrazzledSadHusband

OliviaG said:


> Well, I've been dropping not-too-subtle hints for months now, but he hasn't increased the frequency. Sometimes he doesn't pick up on hints no matter how blunt, and I need to just tell him directly. I don't know why I feel funny about doing that, but I just might take your advice.


Most guys fantasize about their SO doing what I suggested. Most guys enjoy a woman that gets aggressive at least once in a while. If you do what I suggested, and he enjoys going down on you, he will go to sleep that night thinking "Holy Crap, I am the luckiest guy in the world" And or "I am the KING of the World" 

He will go to work the next day kickin @ss!!


----------



## cvan

I don't get women who don't like it...I used to be self conscious about it, but I got over that, thankfully! My husband doesn't like to 'give'. When I asked why, he told me that his first wife told him he didn't have to provide oral sex - eh, thanks a lot there, lady! Even after telling him how much I enjoy it, I still have to beg! And it's crazy, because he's really quite good at it (when it happens, which is like, never, for us at the moment!).


----------



## flyer

My wife absolutely loves me going down on her.
She can O several times, I love the taste of her juices, and so does she. I'll save her juices in my mouth, then share them with her with a kiss.
We had been married probably 25 years before she finally let me eat her. One night I was just fingering her & sucking on her boobs. I just sort of started "sliding" down toward that area. I asked "do you mind"? She just said "if you want to".:smile2: That was all the approval I needed. Now, she either straddles my face while on her knees. Or she lays back & I go between her legs.


----------



## Happilymarried25

flyer said:


> My wife absolutely loves me going down on her.
> She can O several times, I love the taste of her juices, and so does she. I'll save her juices in my mouth, then share them with her with a kiss.
> We had been married probably 25 years before she finally let me eat her. One night I was just fingering her & sucking on her boobs. I just sort of started "sliding" down toward that area. I asked "do you mind"? She just said "if you want to".:smile2: That was all the approval I needed. Now, she either straddles my face while on her knees. Or she lays back & I go between her legs.


I can't believe it took her 25 years to let you and now she loves it. I bet she could get those 25 years back. LOL. My husband enjoys it too and will do it whenever I want and/or when he wants to. He is impotent so it's the only way I can O.


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## rich84

My wife didn't like me to do it because she thought it was gross. I think she was just self conscious and in her head too much to enjoy it. This was for the better part of our 10 years together as a couple. 

Slowly, she came around and I showed her that I found nothing about it unpleasant. In fact I have a pretty strong urge to/oral fixation. 

Now she absolutely loves it. She comes so quickly that it frustrates her because she would like to come with PIV, but can't seem to muster the strength to resist O'ing from oral. 

My enthusiasm for it has led her to be interested in oral for me, too, which she was never very enthusiastic about before. 

I enjoying giving a lot and now that she's receptive it has made me feel that I am able to better express myself sexually. 


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## BBF

Happilymarried25 said:


> I really enjoy when my husband goes down on me mainly because it's the only way I can have an orgasm. It really surprises me when I read posts from husbands here that their wives don't like them going down them and no surprise most of those women don't enjoy having sex and don't have orgasms through PIV. I think that if they would let their husbands go down on them, they would have an orgasm and enjoy sex more.
> 
> Does anybody here not enjoy their husband going down on them?


My wife. Anything below her waist is off limits.


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## arbitrator

BBF said:


> My wife. Anything below her waist is off limits.


*If that is truly the case, avoiders to performing oral sex are just being maritally selfish, emotionally immature, or sexually misinformed!

Or a solid combination of all three!*
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## BBF

arbitrator said:


> *If that is truly the case, they are being maritally selfish, emotionally immature, or sexually misinformed!*
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


And those are her good points.


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## JukeboxHero

bandit.45 said:


> WARNING: EXPLICIT.....
> 
> 
> I was doing it wrong for a long time. What I did not know is that you don't lick pvssy. You suck pvssy. The clitoris is essentially a teeny-tiny penis with the same amount of nerve endings in it that a guy has in his entire penis. Licking the vulva can feel good but it doesn't get a woman off. Like many guys I went down there with my tounge flapping about like a thirsty dog...lapping and flicking...
> 
> Well that doesn't work. All it does is make her feel weird...like she has a lapping, licking dog down there. What I found is that you have to make a big O with your mouth, and basically take in her whole pubic mound in your mouth and kind of latch yourself on like a remora. Keep a steady suction while use use the flat of your tongue, not the tip, to rub her clitoris lightly at first then progressively more pressure and speed as she begins to build towards orgasm. Spell the alphabet out with the flat of your tongue. Stay on that clit. Now, don't do it hard at first...go very very lightly and then as she squirms and moans and you watch her body, you can increase the pressure and speed of your tongue.
> 
> Most of the time this works pretty well at bring her to an O. Experiment. Remember...always ease into it.
> 
> There.... Bandit's cunninlingus 101.



Wow, Bandit nice idea! I'm definitely going to try that. I love performing oral (or I did) on my STBXW, but looks like I won't be able to do it for awhile now 

However, I will try this next time I do have the opportunity to go down on a woman. I just love seeing them squirm and moan with pleasure.

I do have one question though; how do you avoid scraping it with your teeth?


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## JukeboxHero

arbitrator said:


> *If that is truly the case, avoiders to performing oral sex are just being maritally selfish, emotionally immature, or sexually misinformed!
> 
> Or a solid combination of all three!*
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I agree. How could she say anything below the waist is off limits? Does that mean her vagina is totally off-limits to PIV too? Do you only get to play with her breasts? Does she perform oral on you?

If I meet another person, I will need to make sure they love to give and receive oral! Definitely.


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## CuddleBug

Happilymarried25 said:


> I really enjoy when my husband goes down on me mainly because it's the only way I can have an orgasm. It really surprises me when I read posts from husbands here that their wives don't like them going down them and no surprise most of those women don't enjoy having sex and don't have orgasms through PIV. I think that if they would let their husbands go down on them, they would have an orgasm and enjoy sex more.
> 
> Does anybody here not enjoy their husband going down on them?



Mrs.CuddleBug usually pulls me up when I start going down there because she is very insecure about her body. When I do give her oral, force her arms to her sides, she enjoys it but when she starts getting into it, usually pulls me up for PIV instead.

She told me once that me giving her oral to orgasm takes a lot out of her.

I think its more due to her life long insecurities.

When on rare occasion, she has let herself go, I give her oral and she even uses the small vib I bought her at the same time, she has an orgasm and loves it.

Go figure.


Now she knows I love oral from her and I tell her all the time how fantastic she is and her tongue is amazing, saliva, sounds, etc. She really gets into giving me oral.

Since she is Acts of Service that makes sense. It makes her happy to please me. Since I'm Physical, I love all forms of physicality from her and she knows this and it drives her nuts at times. Pushes me away and tells me to f$ck off.


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## NotEasy

CuddleBug said:


> Mrs.CuddleBug usually pulls me up when I start going down there because she is very insecure about her body. When I do give her oral, force her arms to her sides, she enjoys it but when she starts getting into it, usually pulls me up for PIV instead.
> 
> She told me once that me giving her oral to orgasm takes a lot out of her.
> 
> I think its more due to her life long insecurities.
> 
> When on rare occasion, she has let herself go, I give her oral and she even uses the small vib I bought her at the same time, she has an orgasm and loves it.
> 
> Go figure.
> 
> 
> Now she knows I love oral from her and I tell her all the time how fantastic she is and her tongue is amazing, saliva, sounds, etc. She really gets into giving me oral.
> 
> Since she is Acts of Service that makes sense. It makes her happy to please me. Since I'm Physical, I love all forms of physicality from her and she knows this and it drives her nuts at times. Pushes me away and tells me to f$ck off.


I could have written this about myself and my wife. Everything you wrote matches with us so closely. We must be pairs of clones.

I have talked to my wife about this many times, but still she is stuck rarely enjoying oral. I actually prefer giving oral to her than receiving oral.

Please post if you ever discover the secret to the puzzle.


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## NotEasy

Huh, just realised, I got post 69 on a thread on oral. Are there bonus points for that?


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## HumanoidStampede

...


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## rich84

HumanoidStampede said:


> I wish I could enjoy it but I just feel like my husband does it, which is extremely rare, to just do it so he can say he tried. I feel like it is forced and there is no passion when he does therefore I just find it pointless so I tell him to stop or just not even go there. All it makes me end up feeling is pretty disappointed and unappealing :unamused:



Do you know how he really feels about it? Does he really dislike it or is he just insecure about his skills or thinks you don't enjoy it? 

My wife never gave me BJ's. When she did it also felt forced and like she was just doing it for me. No passion. 

She also wouldn't let me go down on her. Finally, I told her that I want to go down on her, I don't care if she returns the favor, I just have a strong desire to express myself sexually with her that way. She slowly let me do more and more, and because I was 110% into it and it felt great, she dropped her insecurities about me being down there. 

After a while of oral only being one sided, she asked me one day if she could give it a try. It was not that passionate, not that good, but I definitely praised her as if it was the best. She kept at it and now she's doing it almost every time I go down on her. She shows passion and energy and gets into it, and it's pretty freaking good now. She was just totally insecure about her ability to please me. 

We put all these barriers up in front of great sex, a lot of them unintentionally. 


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## New_Beginnings

I personally don't like it. My mind isn't in a place during the act to enjoy it and I don't know what I should do with my hands... I wonder if I smell like vagina? Too many thoughts go on in my mind that I'm not focusing on him trying to please me. I'm quite embarrassed, he's aware of how I feel and it's embarrassing because I know he's trying to please me.

I also grew up being taught no sex until marriage (that didn't happen). I do believe part of trying to hide being sexually active or as if it's wrong (in my teenage years), I feel receiving oral isn't right. I'm trying to remove my thoughts on how it doesn't feel right and tell myself it's ok to find pleasure from my husband orally.


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## Ynot

NotEasy said:


> Huh, just realised, I got post 69 on a thread on oral. Are there bonus points for that?


Not really , you want to be 77 because you get ate more!


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## rich84

OliviaG said:


> Can you find a way to talk to him about it and find out how he feels? Although, I have to say in my experience you can pretty much tell how he feels about it by how he performs.
> 
> 
> 
> When my husband is really into it, as he has been through most of our marriage, it's amazing. At those times it's not an easy task to discourage him - he wants it and he's pretty insistent about it and it's obvious he's loving it. And what a turn-on that is to me - it greatly adds to my pleasure.
> 
> 
> 
> Recently my drive has been a lot higher than my husband's. He's now having sex sometimes when he could take it or leave it, just to try to keep me satisfied. On the days that he performs oral for my benefit only, the experience is nothing like when he's really into it. I appreciate him doing this for me (and am not discouraging it by any means, rather I'd like more..), but it's not nearly as much fun when your partner isn't into it himself.



I find that the more aroused I am, the more aggressive I am with the giving - even for someone who seriously likes to give oral. My wife's no different. The more I perform and carry on about the BJ I'm getting, the more she amps it up. 

If all you're doing is some heavy breathing, you're likely not providing a strong arousal feedback loop. Luckily, I have enough desire to generate my own sustained arousal, but if my wife started moaning and carrying on - it would drive me wild. 


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## HumanoidStampede

...


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## HumanoidStampede

...


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## rich84

OliviaG said:


> I give him plenty of "feedback" during the act, that's for sure. I find it hard to be quiet even when I'm trying. But he is really having much more sex than he wants at the moment so I think he just doesn't have the desire in him sometimes, no matter what feedback he gets from me. He refuses to orgasm sometimes lately which has really been hard on my psyche, but he explained that he does it so that he can have sex more often because he knows I need to. He even refuses (most) BJs or will only allow them briefly as foreplay.
> 
> 
> 
> When he first began lagging behind me in the desire for sex it about destroyed me. I thought he had just lost desire for ME, not for sex. Even though we were having sex two or three times per week, if he turned me down on the third or fourth time, I was devastated. Had never been turned down before when I initiated and really NEEDED sex. Reading here helped me to understand that his drive was normal for his age, mine was not, and he was probably telling me the truth that he was still attracted to me and wanted me, etc. But for a while I walked around feeling like a shell of my former self wondering what had happened to my marriage all of a sudden and how to carry on. Something I never anticipated happening and I was shocked at the intensity of my emotion around it.



Sucks, doesn't it? Now add to that your partner thinks your motives are selfish and unreasonable and actively avoids sex for as long as possible and you'll face what a lot of the men (and some women) on here deal with. It does a number on your self esteem. 

It sounds like your hb is trying to accommodate you, but your drives are just mismatched. I'm glad you found help here on TAM to at least fix the self perception issues you were facing. TAM did the same for me. 


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## rich84

HumanoidStampede said:


> When I spoke to him about him, while we were drinking, he said he wants to do it but I need to maintain down there. Which I began doing but it hasn't happened and when we spoke about that it was about 2 months ago. I don't ask him because I feel if he was into it he would go for it, right? I may be wrong. He's always asking me to blow him which I can do no problem but sometimes I stop or not even engage because he does not do it to me. I know it's wrong but then I question is it me or does he just not like it even he expressed that he would like to do it to please me.



Well, I guess everyone has their acceptable threshold for personal hygiene in intimacy. Perhaps he's easily off put and above par grooming and cleanliness would make the difference. Or he could just not like to do it. Personally, I don't really care if my wife is shaved or not, freshly showered, etc. 

Either way, he should know that it bothers you that he won't reciprocate, and it makes you feel less inclined to give him oral (i.e. resentful). 




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## rich84

OliviaG said:


> Yes, once he understood what was happening with me, we got out of the downward spiral that I had (accidentally) started by being so demanding and then hurt when I was refused. He's been absolutely great. He gets it, unlike many of the LD wives that I read about here. Maybe it's easier for men to understand the DESPERATE NEED for sex than it is for women, who rarely seem to feel it because their husbands fulfill their every need. I can honestly tell you that I had no idea how it felt to be refused or to not automatically be able to turn my husband on whenever I made the slightest attempt. Could not have imagined how much it would hurt.



Wow, you nailed it. Killing the desperation and hurt helped turn my dynamic around. But it took some time to unlearn self-defeating behaviors. 

Being able to turn your partner on with the slightest attempt... That must be an intoxicating superpower that women take for granted. 


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## EllisRedding

Oral was something that never really got a great deal of attention. For a variety of reasons it was something that I never really got in to, never had an issue performing on my wife, just never something I really craved to do nor did I ever get the impression it was something high on my wife's list. Over the past few months though I decided to make it a priority, in part in an effort to help spark things up a bit and help get our sex life back on track. Read up on some material, fine tuned my technique, and to my surprise my wife is now more than happy to just lay back and relax lol. Seeing her enjoy it so much makes me get into it much more and enjoy performing on her. For her as well, it makes her feel like I really want her, which I think that mentality/component is just as important as anything physical. It does help that my wife has no issues giving me oral. Honestly, if I was with someone who had little interest in giving me oral, I probably wouldn't bother pursuing oral on her.


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## HumanoidStampede

...


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## HumanoidStampede

...


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## HumanoidStampede

funny cuz I asked my husband if he could feel it and he said "yes because of the increase of juice downstairs" haha


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## froggy7777

Maybe I'm just dumb but really don't know. Some of the abreviations (spelled wrong I know ) and I see some talking about an L D husband. Ok what do theses terms mean. Also P I V. what do the mean if you know. Thank you very much. My wife and I have been married 5 8 years and still in love.


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## EllisRedding

froggy7777 said:


> Maybe I'm just dumb but really don't know. Some of the abreviations (spelled wrong I know ) and I see some talking about an L D husband. Ok what do theses terms mean. Also P I V. what do the mean if you know. Thank you very much. My wife and I have been married 5 8 years and still in love.


I am still trying to figure out all the abbreviations thrown around here...

LD - Low Drive
PIV - Poop In Van (or Penis in Vagina  )


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## arbitrator

EllisRedding said:


> I am still trying to figure out all the abbreviations thrown around here...
> 
> LD - Low Drive
> *PIV - Poop In Van (or Penis in Vagina  )*


*Hey, Ellis ~ Let's just say that as of late, Ol' Arb has come a hell of a lot closer to having one of those "van" episodes much rather than the other one!*
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## froggy7777

What do you mean by P I V?


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## keeper63

Enjoying oral is a very situation-specific thing for my wife. She likes it (sometimes loves it) as a prelude to PIV, but not as a standalone act. She says she sometimes feels emotionally isolated while I am going down on her. In 35 years of sex, I can count the number of times she has orgasmed from oral without begging for PIV afterwards on two hands.

She really enjoys giving me oral however, and it frequently arouses her to the point of wanting PIV even if her original intent was to give me a standalone BJ. She will sometimes even finish me off with oral after she has had an orgasm from PIV. I'm not complaining about that at all, but I wish she would let me do something that is just about her (orgasms from oral without a PIV finish) because I really enjoy giving probably more than I enjoy receiving.


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## keeper63

A woman was once asked by her sex therapist, "Do you know what your a$$hole is doing while you are having an orgasm?"

She replied, "Yes, he is usually out playing golf."


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## Kilgoretrout

Nynaeve said:


> I don't dislike it but I also don't prefer it. I always imagined I'd like it before I got it. Turns out it doesn't live up to my imaginings.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Why?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## BBF

My wife doesn't. 

But that's the least of her foibles.


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## Kilgoretrout

Happilymarried25 said:


> I really enjoy when my husband goes down on me mainly because it's the only way I can have an orgasm. It really surprises me when I read posts from husbands here that their wives don't like them going down them and no surprise most of those women don't enjoy having sex and don't have orgasms through PIV. I think that if they would let their husbands go down on them, they would have an orgasm and enjoy sex more.
> 
> Does anybody here not enjoy their husband going down on them?


That is the only way? Never through piv?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Happilymarried25

Kilgoretrout said:


> That is the only way? Never through piv?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


No never, and now my husband has ED so he rarely gets erect enough to have PIV.


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## Kilgoretrout

Happilymarried25 said:


> No never, and now my husband has ED so he rarely gets erect enough to have PIV.


I'm sorry to hear. What about viagra?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## *Deidre*

I'm getting over my fear of death by oral sex lol  (story in another thread)
I like being on top, and my fiance using his fingers, better than oral. 
For now.


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## Kilgoretrout

*Deidre* said:


> I'm getting over my fear of death by oral sex lol  (story in another thread)
> I like being on top, and my fiance using his fingers, better than oral.
> For now.


Wait, fear of death by oral sex? Please continue...
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## *Deidre*

Kilgoretrout said:


> Wait, fear of death by oral sex? Please continue...
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


There's another thread on here about it, but I've read that a very small (very) percentage of women have died from oral sex. So, sometimes I can't relax enough to enjoy oral sex. I worry about strange things in life, I've always been this way. 

I'm getting past it...with ''help'' from my fiance. lol


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## Kilgoretrout

*Deidre* said:


> There's another thread on here about it, but I've read that a very small (very) percentage of women have died from oral sex. So, sometimes I can't relax enough to enjoy oral sex. I worry about strange things in life, I've always been this way.
> 
> I'm getting past it...with ''help'' from my fiance. lol


Really? I have never ever heard that. Well, I am glad he is helping - lol
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## mjgh06

How can any woman not enjoy oral, unless their is an emotional hang up or pain involved?

My H is very LD and that is the one thing I greatly miss because I rarely get orgasm PIV - only when pent up so much from lack of sex and then I can by PIV or have them while sleeping - that was a new one for me. I knew men could have orgasms in sleep but not women. My H LD changed that. I have dream sex with orgasm all the time now...lol


----------



## Cletus

mjgh06 said:


> How can any woman not enjoy oral, unless their is an emotional hang up or pain involved?


I don't know, how could anyone ever learn to like oysters?

Sexual preferences are not universal. A woman who is very sensitive on the clitoris might not like any activity that directly stimulates it. If she's 100% orgasmic through regular PIV, why would she see a need for anything else?


----------



## Kilgoretrout

*Deidre* said:


> There's another thread on here about it, but I've read that a very small (very) percentage of women have died from oral sex. So, sometimes I can't relax enough to enjoy oral sex. I worry about strange things in life, I've always been this way.
> 
> I'm getting past it...with ''help'' from my fiance. lol


It does seem worth risking ones life for
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## *Deidre*

Kilgoretrout said:


> It does seem worth risking ones life for
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


hmmm! 0


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## Happilymarried25

Kilgoretrout said:


> I'm sorry to hear. What about viagra?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


No he is impotent, he gives himself a shot but he doesn't get fully erect.


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## TX-SC

My wife doesn't like oral sex at all. It's a hang up she has always had. Says it's disgusting. I LOVE oral sex, especially giving. So, I go without. She enjoys a good vibe and PIV sex, just not oral. Even when she just gets out of the shower, she won't let me go down on her. 

It's my only "wish" in our marriage. I wish she would get over her concerns and enjoy oral. When we were dating she would let me. She always had an orgasm that way. She just finds it gross. 

At least I never have to worry about her going bisexual on me!


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## FrazzledSadHusband

TX-SC said:


> My wife doesn't like oral sex at all. It's a hang up she has always had. Says it's disgusting. I LOVE oral sex, especially giving. So, I go without. She enjoys a good vibe and PIV sex, just not oral. Even when she just gets out of the shower, she won't let me go down on her.
> 
> It's my only "wish" in our marriage. I wish she would get over her concerns and enjoy oral. *When we were dating she would let me. *She always had an orgasm that way. She just finds it gross.
> 
> At least I never have to worry about her going bisexual on me!


So, a bait & switch???


----------



## TX-SC

FrazzledSadHusband said:


> So, a bait & switch???


No, she didn't "like it" then either but she went along with it. Over the last 20 years she has become more secure in just saying no to that. I'm okay with it, though I wish it were different. I could never cheat. It's just not in me. But if I did, it would probably be just for the oral sex. In fact, it might be just to give oral sex. Getting a BJ in return would be fun but not a deal breaker. But again, I would/could never do that. I'm just not a cheater. I love my wife too much for that to happen. 

To be fair, we have good sex. It's just one thing she doesn't like.


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## jorgegene

TX-SC said:


> My wife doesn't like oral sex at all. It's a hang up she has always had. Says it's disgusting. I LOVE oral sex, especially giving. So, I go without. She enjoys a good vibe and PIV sex, just not oral. Even when she just gets out of the shower, she won't let me go down on her.
> 
> It's my only "wish" in our marriage. I wish she would get over her concerns and enjoy oral. When we were dating she would let me. She always had an orgasm that way. She just finds it gross.
> 
> At least I never have to worry about her going bisexual on me!


interesting that she finds it 'gross and disgusting' even though it's being performed on her rather than her doing the performing.

so...... it's the thought of it that's disgusting rather than the actual act because she is the passive receiver.

she has every right to think this i think. there is probably a reason in her experience or influence that leads her to think so.


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## FrazzledSadHusband

TX-SC said:


> No, she didn't "like it" then either but she went along with it. Over the last 20 years she has become more secure in just saying no to that. I'm okay with it, though I wish it were different. I could never cheat. It's just not in me. *But if I did, it would probably be just for the oral sex. In fact, it might be just to give oral sex. * Getting a BJ in return would be fun but not a deal breaker. But again, I would/could never do that. I'm just not a cheater. I love my wife too much for that to happen.
> 
> To be fair, we have good sex. It's just one thing she doesn't like.


Likewise, I never would cheat either, but I totally understand what your sayin.

Now for the matters you wrote about: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” 2 But since sexual immorality is occurring, each man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband. 3 The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4 The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. 5 Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. 

The do not deprive each other part IS important!


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## TX-SC

jorgegene said:


> interesting that she finds it 'gross and disgusting' even though it's being performed on her rather than her doing the performing.
> 
> so...... it's the thought of it that's disgusting rather than the actual act because she is the passive receiver.
> 
> she has every right to think this i think. there is probably a reason in her experience or influence that leads her to think so.


I would guess it's just a hangup. It doesn't make me love her any less.


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## TX-SC

FrazzledSadHusband said:


> Likewise, I never would cheat either, but I totally understand what your sayin.
> 
> Now for the matters you wrote about: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” 2 But since sexual immorality is occurring, each man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband. 3 The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4 The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. 5 Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer.
> 
> The do not deprive each other part IS important!


Yeah, I guess, but she isn't depriving me of sex, just oral sex. I want her to be comfortable with sex, not dread it. So, if oral is off the table, so be it.


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## richardsharpe

Good evening
My wife enjoys it as foreplay, though it isn't anything special for her. She never wants an orgasm that way.


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## HumanoidStampede

...


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## Lia_lb2017

With my husband I only enjoy it if I am fresh out the shower and well groomed *as in short trimmed or waxed*. I love knowing that my husband can enjoy eating a nice clean *****. I will not let his mouth near my V unless those aforementioned are met. I used to be self conscious about my tummy but that is nothing a tank top with my breast exposed or lingerie can't fix. I was also self conscious that I might " taste" weird but found that flavored lubricant applied light to the area masks any unpleasant first taste that is quickly licked away by him. This my husband told me lol. So I've come to the conclusion that as long as I feel clean and confident he likes it and so do i .


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## drewg350

I absolutely LOVE going down on my wife, any time, in any position. I tell her every time how much I love eating her out and how great she tastes. It's right at the top as far as her favorite type of sex. She always gets off from oral. If I'm looking for sex and she's not quite in the mood, if I say "please honey, just let me go down on you". She might say no sometimes, but than she thinks about it for 10 seconds and than she's pulling her panties off just as fast as she can. I definitely get alot more out of going down on her, than her giving me a BJ. Nothing excites me more than watching and hearing her orgasm while I'm eating her out, and looking up at her face. She's the one who always tells me "it's time to stop", because she gets so super sensitive immediately upon cumming. I think we're both so lucky that we're both so into it.


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