# Shattered...from underground to Dday...and beyond



## Betrayedred (Jun 16, 2013)

I was on here a lot earlier this summer. Pregnant, early labor, husband having an EA with a 21 year old. I found out, he said he ended it. I stupidly didn't follow up, because he got upset when I did. Yeah, he went waaaaay underground. Way. Made himself a new Apple id to use an app to talk to her. He was defensive, but he seemed more engaged with our marriage. Yeah, well, he was also more engaged with her. Their EA became a PA. 

I went into labor a month early. Had a C section. I thought things were good with WH and me. We had gone on a trip and talked a little about OW. I felt secure. 

Four weeks ago, when our new baby was only six weeks, I got a text message from OW. It said, "I'm tired of the lies." And included a screen shot of their Whatsapp messages. He was detailing what he wanted to do to her on Monday morning---at exactly the time that I was packing his suitcase and writing him sweet notes, as he was going on a trip with his dad for the weekend. 

She sent it to me because he kept telling her that he had filed for divorce when our baby was born. Yeah. He had not, and had no intention. He was cake eating in the biggest way. She was, I think, trying to force his hand, or make me do something. 

Well, I did something. I texted my husband. I told him she had contacted me and that we would talk when he got home, but that I didn't want to talk to him for the rest of his trip. 

Then I invited the OW out for a drink. And I talked to her for about 6 hours. It was...interesting. My WH is so stupid, I think. And I think she is manipulative and mentally ill. I'm a former therapeutic teacher, I have seen a lot of messed up kids...she's one of them. Sigh.

The weekend that he was gone, D weekend, I had all five of our blended kid family. I couldn't eat or sleep, and almost had to stop nursing our baby, because I couldn't provide for him. I thought about filing for divorce. I thought about not picking him up from the airport. I thought about cleaning out our savings and heading home to Georgia. I thought about so many things, but mostly I thought about the man that I thought I had married and the man that I had actually married. 

It's been a month. In that month, for the first two weeks, the OW texted me numerous times, texted him, sent both of us screen shots of conversations. She told him that in addition to her renal failure, she also had cancer with only a 30% chance of survival. He wanted to stay friends with her, because she "needed" him. I disagreed and let him know that if he chose to remain her friend, I would choose to not be his wife any longer. 

I then texted her and called her, and called her bluff. He blew up at me, told me I had ruined everything and that he was done with me. He said he couldn't trust me. I had some good friends with me that day, while he was telling me all of this via text. They helped me pack a few things for my baby and me, and arranged for me to have a place to stay for a few days. I stopped responding to his text messages and stopped taking his phone calls that day. 

The next day, she sent me a text telling me that she wasn't trying to be with my husband, but that she had to tell him that she was pregnant with his child, but couldn't carry it because of her medical condition and that he was excited that she was getting an abortion. I forwarded it on to him. He asked if he could call me and I told him yes. He called and said that he was done with her, because she had been mean to him, said nasty things, and he didn't believe that she was pregnant, and that it was all one drama after another. 

I listened to him in a numb state of mind. Something had snapped in me the day before, as he was sending me all those text messages. I realized that I was giving him my power, my energy, my health, and all the best things about me---and he was treating me like trash. I know that I'm not trash, and I felt myself detach from him. 

These last two weeks have been a roller coaster. I've been so angry---for crying out loud, he was texting with her when I was delivering our child! He told a multitude of lies to me and to her. He gaslighted me until I felt like I was a hysterical, hormonal mess of a pregnant woman. And he's been angry and blaming ME for his affair. I drove him to it. I wasn't a loyal wife. I had hurt him. He does all the work in our marriage, but gets punished for every thing that goes wrong. I sit at home and do nothing while he works his ass off. And on and on and on. 

I detached further, and he started trying to press closer. I told him that I didn't want to be engaged in a marriage by myself. He agreed. He said he realized how much energy he was taking from our marriage for his affair. He says it's over. Trust but verify, right? He asked me to check the cell phone records, to block her number, whatever I needed to do to feel better. I told him that I would block her number if it made him feel better., but that I wouldn't be checking things, as he had already proven that he could get around anything that I know how to check. I told him that I was fine, with or without him, and that if he wanted to be married to me, he would need to prove it. 

We have had one major fight since then, where I did explode and call him some mean names and told him some harsh truths. 
He wants to know if I love him, if I want to be with him, if I think we're going to make it. I tell him that I love him. That I want to be with him, if I am not sharing him. I tell him that we can make it. 

I told him my dealbreakers---contact with her or another affair, and he got defensive and angry and said that the covenant of marriage and unconditional love didn't have deal breakers. I told him that our covenant was broken, and that I could still love him unconditionally, but choose not to stay in a marriage that was disrespectful and damaging to me and the kids. 

So. Here we are. At our first MC, our counselor worked on general things...and told us that for right now, he wants us to look at where we are going, not where we have been. He wants us to focus on building safety and security back into the relationship. We have a session next week and he said we will start dealing with specifics then. 

Some days I look at him and feel such love. Other days I look at him and have a bitter taste in my mouth. I wonder how he could have done the things he did and told the lies that he told. I think about all the times that he lied. I think about him not taking me to the hospital the weekend that our son was born, because he said it was false labor. And really, he just didn't want to be inconvenienced as he tried to have a tryst with her. 

I think I want to work on the marriage. But then, I also think about how much easier it would be to cut my losses and move on. This is my second marriage. I'm no stranger to pain and loss. I'm strong---though it took having the rug pulled out from under me AGAIN, to realize how strong I am. I'm smart. Grajemated from college, ya know?  I'm sexy (Nine weeks post birth, and I'm within five lbs of my pre pregnancy weight). I'm giving, patient, gracious, funny, and so many other things. I'm not a piece of garbage, and this man treated me like I was. Even now, he wants me to meet his needs, to reassure him, and to cater to his wants. He is a fundamentally selfish man, and I am a classic codependent woman---I can fix him, if I just give him enough of me. Ha! 

I have forgiven him. But I don't know how to start healing and working through this. I don't know how to just accept that I won't ever know everything that I think I want to know, or how to wrap my mind around the fact that I was pregnant with OUR son, and he cheated on me. All the while, telling me how I didn't cook dinner or clean the house right. I was supposed to be resting because of the early contractions, and all he could do was come home and gripe because I hadn't fixed a four course dinner. Sigh. I don't know how to get over those things. 

When is it ok to say, "You know what? I thought I could do this, but I don't think I can. I need some space to think. I need some time for ME to heal, before I can even think about time for US to heal." Heck, our MC counselor and I were on the phone today, and he told me that I would have to be the flexible one and accept that my needs were not going to be met in this marriage---at least not any time soon. I don't know if I want to be the flexible one. 

Ok. There are so many other details, but it hurts to think about them right now. I haven't slept in almost three days (well, I've had about 6 hours of sleep in three days) and I think I might be rambling. So that's all that I can tell of my story for now. I am going to finish my wine cooler, hope that my beautiful almost 10 week old son will sleep for a good four hours, and attempt to get some sleep myself. 

Thanks for reading.


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## illwill (Feb 21, 2013)

What are your real dealbreakers? Not the ones you tell us about or him, but the ones only you know about. Figure that out. And truly stick to them. You need true conviction. Because he will not believe you. And you will be tried.


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## ne9907 (Jul 17, 2013)

WoW Betrayed...
I am so sorry for you.
My first instinct would be to tall you to leave your husband and find happiness elsewhere.

But you are working on your marriage. You cannot change your husband, he must want to change for himself.
How old are you both? How many children do you have?
Do you think you could be okay without him?
If you think you could be okay without him, then you should leave.

If you wish to stay in the marriage, I suggest you begin implementing a plan B. Plan B consist of having your personal bank account, talking to a lawyer to see what your rights are, looking for a job (if you don't have one), continue with IC, starts looking at your husband with different eyes sort of like an outsider looking in.
Live for yourself, once you do that I think you will be strong enough to decide what is best for you
Good luck and I am so sorry


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## illwill (Feb 21, 2013)

And the time to walk away is anytime you want. You owe this man nothing.


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## HangingOnHope (Oct 26, 2013)

I am very sorry for the pain you've endured. 

I rarely deal in absolutes. I'm all about the gray areas. However, I have a *very bad feeling about this man as marriage material, going forward. You were at one of your most vulnerable times in life and even in that moment (childbirth)..he chose to be selfish and engage himself with the OW. Further, when she expressed being vulnerable (illness)...he says she needs him? wth? Sorry..deal breaker for me, no matter what he says now. 

If it were me, I would cut my losses now, yes. But its not me..and if you think there is a chance this broken man can be mended, (given the absolute that he'd acknowledge being broken..and want to mend himself), then I wish you all the best. But I do think this man would need a wife who is hypervigilant for years to come. Are you up for that sort of thing? If not..someday the other shoe may very well drop.


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## walkonmars (Aug 21, 2012)

So he gave her up because of they way she treated him? That's the reason he wants you back? 

Unreal. 

You should insist the counselor address this issue. And soon before you go much further.


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## Betrayedred (Jun 16, 2013)

Thanks, everyone. 

I have started my plan B. I have a part time job that he doesn't know about. With my first paycheck, I will be opening an account. I have consulted a lawyer. And I am trying not to walk on eggshells and trying not to take care of his upsets for him. I now see him as a self indulgent child. 

Our kids are 13,11,6,6, and 10 weeks. One of the 6 year olds and the 11 year old are mine from 1st marriage. 

And I know it would re rough for a while without him, but I also know I would be fine. Probably more than fine.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## walkonmars (Aug 21, 2012)

Betrayedred said:


> Thanks, everyone.
> 
> I have started my plan B. I have a part time job that he doesn't know about. With my first paycheck, I will be opening an account. I have consulted a lawyer. And I am trying not to walk on eggshells and trying not to take care of his upsets for him. I now see him as a self indulgent child.
> 
> ...


That's the spirit! Good attitude and good plan.


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## Betrayedred (Jun 16, 2013)

Thanks, walkonmars. I am confident, in my good moments, that I will be fine. In my darker moments, I think as a Redheaded Southern Woman, and contemplate ways to hurt him. Of course, the sweet codependent in me shies away from actually inflicting emotional turmoil onto my poor poor husband. 😜 

My part time job has nothing to do with my Education degree---I am actually cleaning houses, but it pays really well, and the physical activity helps me to get out some of my pent up anger. And with every house I clean, I think about my bank account balance and not being dependent on someone who would hurt me in this way. It feels good.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ne9907 (Jul 17, 2013)

> In my darker moments, I think as a Redheaded Southern Woman, and contemplate ways to hurt him.


:smthumbup:

I am a brunette Mexican woman and I have also contemplated ways of hurting him and them!!!!
I think this feeling is universal~


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## WalterWhite (Sep 14, 2012)

With all the crap your husband has pulled I cannot believe you still want to make it work. Wow, how can you settle for crumbs!?!


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## MovingAhead (Dec 27, 2012)

Betrayed,

I am so sorry for you. You are doing a wonderful job. Be strong. The lawyer is important. Getting a job is fantastic. It is hard to see what you got until you take the wrapper off. There is no way a man should treat you like this. God bless and you should be very proud of yourself for taking the right steps.


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## Betrayedred (Jun 16, 2013)

WalterWhite said:


> With all the crap your husband has pulled I cannot believe you still want to make it work. Wow, how can you settle for crumbs!?!


Walter, (one of my fave tv shows, btw---on season 3 on Netflix) I haven't even posted the half of it, lol. Yet, why would I want to give this marriage a chance? I don't know. I stayed in my first marriage far too long, with emotional and mental abuse on a daily basis. Perhaps part of me wants to make this turn out ok so that I won't have "failed," again? I do know that at Dday2and before, I felt helpless. I was seriously barefoot and pregnant. Oh, and did I mention that I was also grieving the loss of my Daddy--- he died on June 3, and that was the day WH decided to tell me about OW's "health issues," for the first time. On Dday2 and the days after, I was single parenting our five kids, as he was out of town with his dad. I saw and see how our kids adore each other, and part of me wants to keep it together for them. Because I won't have any legal rights to my step kids if/when we divorce, and that hurts almost more than losing WH. 

I am slowly but surely regaining my power, my strength, my spunk! And I know for myself, if I choose to stay in this marriage, I will get the whole enchilada, not just crumbs or leftovers, because I am worth it all.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Gonna Make It (Dec 3, 2012)

The MC does not want to talk about what went wrong and says YOU are the one who will have to be flexible and not have needs met. WTH!!!! Did this guy or girl get their degree off the back of a box of cracker jacks? And while I am on the subject, your WH's comment that your "covenant of marriage" doesn't have a deal breaker? Where the crap does he get that? Even Jesus said that divorce because of sexual immorality (read PA) is allowed. So I guess your WH thinks he is better than Jesus, LOL!

Seriously, run. Get a lawyer and take the kids back to GA. This guy wanted to stay friends with her because she needed him because of HER medical condition but wanted to mistreat you during yours. And to top it off, he tells you how much SHE needs him the very same day YOUR dad dies, this guy is scum!!!! This guy makes John Edwards look like a saint!


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## Betrayedred (Jun 16, 2013)

Our MC said we will get into specifics with the next sessions. He also knows how stubborn my WH is, and knows that of the two of us, I am the one most likely to see more than one perspective. My mom and I were talking today about having to be the only one in a relationship like that. I am in no way excusing his choices, but I do know that I have absolutely stunk at enforcing boundaries, and I have allowed him to be selfish at my expense. That made it easier for him to have this affair---he knew I would absorb the fall out and fix things for him, I think. That's what I have stopped doing in the past two weeks---fixing his brokenness and making things right for him. It's hard for me, but it will be worthwhile. 

And as I look at my kids, who are cuddled around me right now, I know that no matter what--D or R, that me being stronger and able to enforce my personal boundaries will make me a better mom and person. His brokenness and screwy thinking don't have to cripple me any longer.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

walkonmars said:


> So he gave her up because of they way she treated him? That's the reason he wants you back?
> 
> Unreal.
> 
> You should insist the counselor address this issue. And soon before you go much further.


:iagree:


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## Betrayedred (Jun 16, 2013)

I actually addressed it with WH. I asked him if he wanted to R with me because of how she had treated him. He said no, that he realized that he was in danger of losing the best things in his life---me and the kids. The fact that she had been "mean," just made it easier for him to cut things off with her. Hmmm, right? He is NOT a great communicator, and I am a very precise communicator...I have to give a little grace in the area of communication between us, as I am a writer and a confident speaker. He is not, and gets flustered when engaged in conflict. I get cool and analytical. So he says things that don't come out right, and if I am feeling kind, I usually try to clarify with him. If I am not feeling kind, I tell him to think before he speaks. Sigh.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## weightlifter (Dec 14, 2012)

Twice a loser?

If you R I smell more pain in your future but it will take longer because he is getting better and better at hiding it.

Lets be blunt and Ill take the heat for being Mr Chauvinist. Female sex value declines as you age. Sorry Ill take the hits but its true. Your ability to find the man YOU DESERVE declines by the day and he does not deserve what you wipe off your bum after a case of the runs.


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## Aerith (May 17, 2013)

weightlifter said:


> Twice a loser?
> 
> If you R I smell more pain in your future but it will take longer because he is getting better and better at hiding it.
> 
> Lets be blunt and Ill take the heat for being Mr Chauvinist. Female sex value declines as you age. Sorry Ill take the hits but its true. Your ability to find the man YOU DESERVE declines by the day and he does not deserve what you wipe off your bum after a case of the runs.


Sex value is just for sex. For marriage not only sex value considered...otherwise all WHs would have left their wives for mistresses but that does not happen....

However. You are right, the harsh reality is women are aging faster in average


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## Chris989 (Jul 3, 2012)

Betrayedred said:


> Walter, (one of my fave tv shows, btw---on season 3 on Netflix)


I had to stop watching mid season 3 you'll see why 

Reading your story it sounds like your WH has no remorse. I suspect he will do it again.

You don't deserve this.


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## Betrayedred (Jun 16, 2013)

Yeeeeah, I am kinda coming to that conclusion. In my IC session, however, my counselor reminded me that my ADHD brain tends to want to act NOW, when sometimes, it's ok to stop and catch my breath. He suggested not making a firm decision right away, but to give myself a time frame. He also suggested that I journal daily, so that I have an accurate picture of that time frame. And not to stop regaining myself. 

As far as my sex value--- I am not really worried about that at this point. I am blessed to be a redhead who has and continues to take care of herself---and I am often mistaken for younger than I am. Besides that, I am not sure I ever want to be back on the market, should I D WH😔
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Betrayedred (Jun 16, 2013)

I did want to say thank you, though, weightlifter! You're not a chauvinist if it's the truth😄. And, I truly appreciate the last part of your post!😃
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## missthelove2013 (Sep 23, 2013)

It sounds like you have gone well above and beyond the call of duty...he should wake up every morning thanking god he has someone as forgiving as you...I sincerely hope he gets his head out of his ass and puts 100% into his family...


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## weightlifter (Dec 14, 2012)

Betrayedred said:


> I did want to say thank you, though, weightlifter! You're not a chauvinist if it's the truth😄. And, I truly appreciate the last part of your post!😃
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Look I want YOU TO WIN. However you define it. 

I'm not exactly known here as Mr Subtle.

As for the aging faster thing... Yes I know it aint fair.


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

Hey Betrayedred. Just wanted to say keep your chin up! You really are married to a POS!! If I was in your neck of the woods, I would offer your WH some free "self defense " sessions! He would certainly benefit from my "instructions ".
You should definitely take your time in deciding what YOU want, not considering what WH wants. I hope you stop cutting him any slack. He has utterly betrayed and trampled on you! He is not fit to speak your name, much less call you wife!

He has no honor, dignity, or strength! Your MC needs his or her brain examined! He needs to change! You need to be less flexible, not more! There are men out there who are worth your time, love, and energy. Men who would feel honored to have you as a wife.

Do not settle! You don't have to.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Betrayedred (Jun 16, 2013)

I want to be appreciated for the person that I am. I have put up with and worked around a lot. The thing that keeps tripping me up is that I can see glimpses of the man that he could be, and those keep me hanging onto hope. 

Sigh. I worked at my job today, and feel strong...and WH is calling me every thirty minutes because he feels depressed. He asked me why I wasn't saying anything, because normally I would encourage him and tell him that I will do this or that to help him feel better. I told him I didn't really know what to say, but that I would listen to him vent. 

Are there strong men out there who want a partner and not a mommy/maid?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

Betrayedred said:


> I want to be appreciated for the person that I am. I have put up with and worked around a lot. The thing that keeps tripping me up is that I can see glimpses of the man that he could be, and those keep me hanging onto hope.
> 
> Sigh. I worked at my job today, and feel strong...and WH is calling me every thirty minutes because he feels depressed. He asked me why I wasn't saying anything, because normally I would encourage him and tell him that I will do this or that to help him feel better. I told him I didn't really know what to say, but that I would listen to him vent.
> 
> ...


Absolutely YES!!! You just need to take your time and observe. No man is perfect, but men who don't need a mommy, are out there. Many are represented on TAM. The key to finding one is to keep your heart guarded until you have seen how a man acts and interacts with people and situations over a period of time.

It might take some time, but you can find a man capable of taking care of himself and you and your children.
My one and only wife had two marriages before me. They both treated her like you have been treated. It took me 4 years to convince her to marry me and I asked her the first week we met.
We have been married for18 years, together for 22.

People can change, but it is not your job to change your WH! Take care of yourself and if he becomes a better man down the road....
But you don't need to wait around and you aren't responsible for cleaning up his sh!t!! Take care redhead!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Thorburn (Nov 23, 2011)

I cleaned houses in grad school. Also did carpentry and painting. The folks in New York paid very well.

You have a plan and your eyes are opened. Good for you.


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## Anuvia (Jul 10, 2013)

Betrayedred said:


> I was on here a lot earlier this summer. Pregnant, early labor, husband having an EA with a 21 year old. I found out, he said he ended it. I stupidly didn't follow up, because he got upset when I did. Yeah, he went waaaaay underground. Way. Made himself a new Apple id to use an app to talk to her. He was defensive, but he seemed more engaged with our marriage. Yeah, well, he was also more engaged with her. Their EA became a PA.
> 
> I went into labor a month early. Had a C section. I thought things were good with WH and me. We had gone on a trip and talked a little about OW. I felt secure.
> 
> ...


No offense but your husband sounds like a real a$$hole. What garbage heap did you pull him out of? This story really pissed me off. I don't have any advice to offer you but I wish you all the best.


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## onestepatatime (Oct 23, 2013)

Don't move on with him until he shows some respect for you. He sounds very selfish and has not respected you at all.


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## Betrayedred (Jun 16, 2013)

I actually like cleaning the houses. It's an amazing workout!  And I'm meeting some neat people!  I like people.

However, I had kept the job a secret from my WH, for two weeks. And I am not a good liar. I finally just had to tell him that I have a job and I want to keep it. He is annoyed, says I am better than cleaning houses (my thought is, if it's honest work, then nothing is beneath me, I'm not "better," just because I have a degree), it's not good for our 10 week old to be without me, he'll work two jobs to earn more money, etc. I told him that I want this job, and stood up to him. That's big for me, as I typically try to placate him. 

So then he moved on to trashing my exH, about how little he pays in child support, and how he, my WH, is always picking up the slack for the ex, and how I never stand up to my exH, and how it's ok if he (WH) works himself to death because exH won't pay more in child support. 

Frustrations. Argh. I just listened, didn't attach.

I think I need to get a VAR and attach it to the underside of his seat. I suspect he has a burner phone or an app to talk to the AP---some things just aren't adding up yet, and he is still so focused on himself, not on R, or me. 

He isn't even pursuing me at this point. He told me yesterday that his love tank was empty and asked me to tell him something sweet today. He says I am distant and don't seem to want to talk to him about anything. Um yeah---- because I want to ask a few questions, and he gets defensive and aggravated when I do---he doesn't want to talk about what I need to talk about. 

Respect---I cleaned a bathroom to that song today, and sang it OUT!


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

R E S P E C T!!! I hope you keep singing that tune!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

A VAR Is not a bad idea. Weightlifter Is Captain expert On their use And is super committed to helping people If you're interested.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

Oh and BTW. My wife Had a three year old son when I met her. I could care less If she ever got any child support. She didn't really want any anyway. When I married her I knew that he was part of the package. I took him and love him And raised him As my own. I still love him to this day. He still calls me Dad. And he is 25. 
The more I hear about your husband The more I desire To give him an "attitude " adjustment!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Betrayedred (Jun 16, 2013)

Conan, he's 6'3", 245 lbs. He works on cars all day---he's pretty intimidating!  The best way for his attitude to be adjusted is very simply for it to not be tolerated or fed into anymore!  And once I set my mind to something, I do it----very well!


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

I agree with your take on his attitude and the way to deal with it. I trust your judgement on it. However I walk the walk. I have never started a fight but I have finished everyone. I am 5 foot 10 and weigh 180. I have fought many opponents larger than your husband. I have never lost. It has never even been close. 
I used to be a real bad boy, but when I met my wife, that started to change. I still think some men need a good thumping. It helps the thought process. 
Anyway, I'll drop it. You sound like your doing good!
Smiles.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Betrayedred (Jun 16, 2013)

Conan, if you wanted to give him an attitude adjustment, I wouldn't stop you  

Some days are better than others, ya know? Weirdly enough, the LESS contact I have with WH, the better I do. This is his three day weekend---the last three day weekend he had, I "ruined" it by fighting about OW, and by staying elsewhere for a night. Let's hope I can stay detached this time.


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

So let me get this straight: YOU have to be flexible, meaning your hb is a selfish pos so if you want to stay married you have to kids his a$$. And you didn't cook and clean enough, so be f$cked a 21 year old? Because we know how much 21 year olds cook and clean. Do yourself a favor and get rid of this selfish piece of crap.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

I hope you have a great 3 day weekend! I hope your H does too, by himself of course! LOL! Your attitude seems really good, might give him some food for thought and maybe he will start to blame himself for his crappy behavior ...... Then again, maybe he'll just keep blaming you.
Oh well. Hope for the best, prepare for the worst.
At least you are changing what you can, namely yourself. I hope you like who you see in the mirror. 
Smiles.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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