# C-ptsd?



## Machjo (Feb 2, 2018)

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## VibrantWings (Sep 8, 2017)

I have it.Was beaten, among other abuses/tortures on an almost daily basis as a child. Was diagnosed with it years ago, have been through counseling for it (along with the depression that can go along with it). I spent years without medication, learned "coping skills" because, you know, I'm Super Woman or some such **** and always want to tough it out. I started meds about six (?) years ago and not only is my life better but so is everyone else's around me. (Read: I don't anger so easily or feel "trapped"). The daily dose of anti-anxiety meds have helped change a lot of my perceptions and I'm happier for it.

My daughters: all have had some type of anxiety issues. That's not all on me though: their father is an alcoholic and has suffered with his own anxiety/depression issues. In other words, it's in the bloodline on both sides. Both of us came from dysfunctional homes though I do believe the lives of our children are much better than our own were as kids. It's something that is highly important to us both as parents. 

I have read about it some. The "C" you mention stands for "complicated" as in it's not so easy to treat or understand when it happens in childhood. I don't think most of the people around me realize that I have it. It's not something I announce. 
I do believe what most people may notice about me is "the switch"....as in people with PTSD have a hard time finding "middle ground". I do tend to be an "all or nothing" type of person. 

However, I tend to think it makes me a bit more "honest" about some things...makes me see things from a different perspective than some others might....and overall, I feel stronger for it all. I have survived it....and I still am


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## Machjo (Feb 2, 2018)

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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

I was diagnosed with PTSD when i was about 60. Apparenlty I've had it from about the time I was 10 from living in a place where there was a war going on. And then i've had more thing happen to add to it... raped, attempted rape/murder and a very bad prgenancy that ended in still born twins and me also dying ( hemeraging ).

My father had PTSD too from WWII. He was on the Baatan Death March and then survived 3.5 hours of the horrors of a Japanese prison camp. 

When i was younger there was no talk of PTSD and people just learned to live with it.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

I have heard that Regression therapy is very good for resolving issues related to PTSD.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Machjo said:


> I was wondering if anyone here has any experience or knowledge of PTSD. How did you learn that you might suffer PTSD-like symtoms? How have you learnt to cope with it (or at least its more harmful symptoms)? Do you worry about passing it on to your children in the form of trans-generational trauma?


I was involved with the aftermath of an assault and threatened at gun point. I have no children. I pretty much spiraled at first and had to be put on medication. I have since stopped taking it after 10 years. 

My symptoms were at first the typical panic attacks which I took for being a heart attack, obsession with death, where I felt like I was about to die in the next few moments, and finally dissociation. I think this was my minds way of coping with the fear. Eventually I needed to be put on medication to stop the circular thinking. This was a very hard time in my life. I was able to keep most of my suffering from everyone, which I am not sure was helpful but I think it needed to be done. 

Today over 10 years later I still occasionally have the physical symptoms of a panic attack but I know what they are and I just sit down and breath, because I am able to identify what is happening there really is no fear surrounding them, just physical symptoms, like heart racing, and the initial few seconds of dread. Then I calm myself down and just feel tired. These are rare too. 

It gets better but don't hesitate to get help, tell your primary but make sure you go to a clinical physiologist because the meds do have side effects. I feel like for the years I was on the meds I was not fully emotionally present. I am glad I am off them now, but I do think they were a necessary evil at the time.

Hope that helps.


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## Notself (Aug 25, 2017)

This site is very helpful:
https://www.myptsd.com/


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## ButWeAreStrange (Feb 2, 2018)

I was diagnosed with PTSD when I was 12 (it was later changed to C-PTSD as an adult), from various sources of trauma throughout my development. One of the interesting things I've recently read about it is that some psychologists are now considering it to be more of a developmental/personality disorder than strictly an anxiety one (like traditional PTSD). 

I've never been given treatment for it aside from the occasional talking therapy, but I have heard that there are specialists out there that have new approaches to helping make living with the disorder more bearable. 

Your question about it being trans-generational, though, was a good point to bring up. Both of my parents suffer from it (neither have been officially diagnosed but absolutely have it from excessive childhood trauma), and growing up the few times it leaked into their parenting did affect me and my sisters. Now that I'm a parent myself, I often have to keep an open mind and communicative avenue for discussing it with my kids. My eldest is now old enough to understand it a bit more, but it's still very difficult to explain it any further beyond "Sometimes Mommy has a hard time doing things" or "Mommy's feeling sick today." My husband was recently diagnosed Bipolar, too, so our children are being raised in a household where mental health is a factor that we can't shy away from. No matter how much I wish I could control it, I know that I can't always, and being as open about it as I can allows not only myself to have the space to cope with it, but also grants my children the opportunity to grow up understanding that mental health is important to talk about. I try to make an active effort to check in with their well-being and mental health as they grow up not only as children of parents with disorders, but simply because that's part of being a good parent. 

On another note, I have found my disorder to help me in parenting is that I'm able to apply (to a healthy degree) the lessons learned in my own upbringing that help protect and prevent similar trauma from my children.


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