# Need Advise and opinions please



## blondmist82 (Feb 20, 2010)

Hi guys, I am new to this forum or any marraige forum for that fact. I am 27 and my H is 28. We have been together since we were both 20 and married for 3 years. He doesnt go out that often due to past issues with him going out. See he went out when I was pregnant with our first son (6 mos preg), about 2 1/2 years ago, and did not come home until after 6AM (we had got in a fight before he left). A few days later while he was in the shower I went through his phone. I found a video of him (with his clothes on) touching some naked girls a$$ while he video taped it. His excuse... I told you there was a bacholor party and so I went and there were strippers and some guy bought me a dance. First off, why would they not buy the dance for themselves but whatever... So while he was in the shower I left and it only lasted 3 days but things got better. 

Now, I am pregnant again (second time) and I am 19 weeks (we find out the sex on Monday) and he wanted to go out with his friend last night and I had no problem with it because he said he would be home before 1. Well I work in the morning at 6am and at 2 am I text him... asked if he was coming home or what and he said Im on my way... then a minute later text again that he was sorry if it is so late but him and this guy hardly kick it anymore (they play xbox online every night). Needless to say, he was not on his way home and he did not answer to my next texts or calls. I was calling him up until 4:30 AM. I went to take a shower at 5AM and when I got out he was on the couch sleeping!!! He basically told me to shut up when I tried to ask when he got home. So I left for work.

At work I checked out phone logs and found that he received a text for this Camel looking Bi^@# that he used to work with 9and was a stripper) at 7:30 (he had left at 6pm that night) and then she also called him 2 tmes at 9:40 and 945 and they talked for two minutes each time. Well then I also saw that the he had called the guy that he was supposedly with that night 5 times between 2:42 am until 3:38AM and he called him back once between those times! WTF I guess he wasnt really with him but I dont know and if I tell him I looked that stuff up he will say I snoop to much! I dont know what to do but I do know that this stress is not good for the baby!D I do not know how to approach him about this or what to say (a part of me is worried if we fight and he leaves and takes our son with him or even takes him when I am at work). Any advise would greatly be appreciated! Thanks in advance!


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## shazil (Feb 25, 2010)

blondmist82 said:


> Hi guys, I am new to this forum or any marraige forum for that fact. I am 27 and my H is 28. We have been together since we were both 20 and married for 3 years. He doesnt go out that often due to past issues with him going out. See he went out when I was pregnant with our first son (6 mos preg), about 2 1/2 years ago, and did not come home until after 6AM (we had got in a fight before he left). A few days later while he was in the shower I went through his phone. I found a video of him (with his clothes on) touching some naked girls a$$ while he video taped it. His excuse... I told you there was a bacholor party and so I went and there were strippers and some guy bought me a dance. First off, why would they not buy the dance for themselves but whatever... So while he was in the shower I left and it only lasted 3 days but things got better.
> 
> Now, I am pregnant again (second time) and I am 19 weeks (we find out the sex on Monday) and he wanted to go out with his friend last night and I had no problem with it because he said he would be home before 1. Well I work in the morning at 6am and at 2 am I text him... asked if he was coming home or what and he said Im on my way... then a minute later text again that he was sorry if it is so late but him and this guy hardly kick it anymore (they play xbox online every night). Needless to say, he was not on his way home and he did not answer to my next texts or calls. I was calling him up until 4:30 AM. I went to take a shower at 5AM and when I got out he was on the couch sleeping!!! He basically told me to shut up when I tried to ask when he got home. So I left for work.
> 
> At work I checked out phone logs and found that he received a text for this Camel looking Bi^@# that he used to work with 9and was a stripper) at 7:30 (he had left at 6pm that night) and then she also called him 2 tmes at 9:40 and 945 and they talked for two minutes each time. Well then I also saw that the he had called the guy that he was supposedly with that night 5 times between 2:42 am until 3:38AM and he called him back once between those times! WTF I guess he wasnt really with him but I dont know and if I tell him I looked that stuff up he will say I snoop to much! I dont know what to do but I do know that this stress is not good for the baby!D I do not know how to approach him about this or what to say (a part of me is worried if we fight and he leaves and takes our son with him or even takes him when I am at work). Any advise would greatly be appreciated! Thanks in advance!


IMHO, he does not love you. choice is yours . Bail out or if you think that it is a matter of survival for you to stay with him then, i suggest survive


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## lovinghimforever (Dec 14, 2009)

IMO, you NEED to bring it up. Don't bring up specifics of looking at the phone history, but do bring it up. It doesn't matter where you found the information, he LIED to you and he needs to man up.


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