# Frustrated beyond belief



## Married4life123 (Apr 14, 2019)

Hey guys, my libido is about a 15 out of 10. My wife’s is about a -5 out of 10. How do you manage something like this? I masturbate several times a day but other than that is there any other way to keep this in check? I am so effing frustrated. But I don’t want to cause any issues. She works hard and is always tired it seems like I’m the only one with the issue...


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

How old are you? I only ask because several times a day seems excessive. How do you even get the time and opportunity to do this while you are at work say? Have you sat down and suggested that you find a compromise? So if you want sex once a day and she wanst sex once every 2 weeks you could agree on 1-2 times a week say.


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## Married4life123 (Apr 14, 2019)

I’m 47 and so is the wife. I realize my sexual appetite is probably out of the norm but I’m trying to manage it. You wpuld be suprised (maybe) that regardless of where you are you can masterbate frequently and it actually makes it more exciting sometimes if its in a less than private place... 


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

Married4life123 said:


> I’m 47 and so is the wife. I realize my sexual appetite is probably out of the norm but I’m trying to manage it. You wpuld be suprised (maybe) that regardless of where you are you can masterbate frequently and it actually makes it more exciting sometimes if its in a less than private place...
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


Just make sure its not where you can be seen, you could get into big trouble.


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## Married4life123 (Apr 14, 2019)

Just as an example. We have both had the last three days off together and I made a point to not initiate anything. I wanted to see if she would have any inclination to do anything sexual or playful at all. It’s day three and I just finally mentioned that we had about an hour or two before my daughter came home and she said I was so predictable…. WTF… I’m so done


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## Married4life123 (Apr 14, 2019)

I seriously don’t think there’s a power in the universe greater than the power a woman has to withhold sex from a man. I am so jealous


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## gr8ful1 (Dec 3, 2016)

Married4life123 said:


> Just as an example. We have both had the last three days off together and I made a point to not initiate anything. I wanted to see if she would have any inclination to do anything sexual or playful at all. It’s day three and I just finally mentioned that we had about an hour or two before my daughter came home and she said I was so predictable…. WTF… I’m so done


Ask her what frequency would she ENTHUSIASTICALLY have sex (nothing worse than sympathy sex in my view). You have two choices: come to a compromise that works for both of you, or let her know this is a boundary for you and that you two are sadly sexually incompatible, which is a deal-breaker for you.

Was she different when she was younger? How long have you been together?


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

If you're having to masturbate that many times a day, it is your issue. That seems awfully time-consuming. Your wife isn't the one who's out of the norm and I don't think anyone would want to oblige you that many times. Have you seen a doctor?


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## Married4life123 (Apr 14, 2019)

gr8ful1 said:


> Ask her what frequency would she ENTHUSIASTICALLY have sex (nothing worse than sympathy sex in my view). You have two choices: come to a compromise that works for both of you, or let her know this is a boundary for you and that you two are sadly sexually incompatible, which is a deal-breaker for you.
> 
> Was she different when she was younger? How long have you been together?


Been together (married)for 20 years. I’ve never asked her but I don’t remember her ever having much of a desire for sex other than maybe the first few years together. I am definitely attracted to her and want so much to have a robust sexual relationship again but I really dont know how to communicate that with het. Ive tried to bring it up from time to time over the years but nothing ever came of if other than an argument so I usually drop it


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## ABHale (Jan 3, 2016)

So she isn’t willing to come up with a solution or even talk about it. Then when you try to initiate she has a smart azz remark for you. Nice wife you have there


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## Married4life123 (Apr 14, 2019)

ABHale said:


> So she isn’t willing to come up with a solution or even talk about it. Then when you try to initiate she has a smart azz remark for you. Nice wife you have there


Pretty much yeah.. I am always and have forever been the “bad guy” in this scenario.


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

Married4life123 said:


> Been together (married)for 20 years. I’ve never asked her but I don’t remember her ever having much of a desire for sex other than maybe the first few years together. I am definitely attracted to her and want so much to have a robust sexual relationship again but I really dont know how to communicate that with het. Ive tried to bring it up from time to time over the years but nothing ever came of if other than an argument so I usually drop it
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


She probably burnt out on it because of the frequency a long time ago. That's not going to be acceptable to most people.


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

Perhaps marriage counseling could help, but it won't change her being so tired so often if that is a root cause. Aside from that, divorce may be the only option you have to try to find someone more compatible (but I doubt you'll find anyone who will match your 3x a day for long or consistently, but 1x a day isn't difficult for a good relationship). If things are bad now, they most likely will get worse. The sooner you do _something_, the sooner you may find something or someone that works for you.


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## Married4life123 (Apr 14, 2019)

Married but Happy said:


> Perhaps marriage counseling could help, but it won't change her being so tired so often if that is a root cause. Aside from that, divorce may be the only option you have to try to find someone more compatible (but I doubt you'll find anyone who will match your 3x a day for long or consistently, but 1x a day isn't difficult for a good relationship). If things are bad now, they most likely will get worse. The sooner you do _something_, the sooner you may find something or someone that works for you.


Sadly, I really dont think finding someone else after 25 yards of marriage is really an option. I would be happy if she would just show some initiative once in a while 


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Be careful you don't go blind....


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## FloridaGuy1 (Nov 4, 2019)

I don't have any advice OP but I think your situation is more common than you think. I am convinced many married couples are not sexually on the same page. My guess is very few couples have a satisfying sex life for BOTH parties.

Therefore you have two choice:
1. Live with it
2. Divorce

Yeah I know both options suck.


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

Married4life123 said:


> I seriously don’t think there’s a power in the universe greater than the power a woman has to withhold sex from a man. I am so jealous
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


Right. It is abusive. I heard someone say that about a POed hubby not speaking to his wife and thought that is the word i was thinking about for spouses that withhold sexual intamacy.


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## Mr.Married (Feb 21, 2018)

While others have written about the 3x a day ... I’ll make a different point of view.

A person who is dying of thirst can only think about water just like a person starving for sex can only think of sex (and try to do something about it)

Here is the bottom line: You either have a long hard talk with your wife about ..... or learn to live with it. I’m not talking about a temper tantrum that gets you pity sex. I’m talking about the discussion where you tell her how serious this is and what actions you may take over it.

If your not willing to DO what you SAY .... then just forget about it and keep jerking.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Divinely Favored said:


> Right. It is abusive. I heard someone say that about a POed hubby not speaking to his wife and thought that is the word i was thinking about for spouses that withhold sexual intamacy.


It can be abusive it's used to manipulate, but in the same respect no one is entitled to their spouses body. If you are in a sexless marriage and unhappy about it you need to leave or renegotiate the terms of the deal.


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

sokillme said:


> It can be abusive it's used to manipulate, but in the same respect no one is entitled to their spouses body. If you are in a sexless marriage and unhappy about it you need to leave or renegotiate the terms of the deal.


Biblically you are. Bible says you bodies belong to each other and not to withhold unless you both are in agreement. 

I am referring to someone who's LL is physical intimacy and a spouse deciding they just are not that interrested in sex any longer is no different in a spouse deciding to not speak to their spouse any longer....giving them the silent treatment. After all they are not entitled to your comunication or even your presence either i suppose. Someone on a thread called the silent treatment, emotional abuse and i thought BINGO! that is the word for withholding physical intimacy from your spouse i was thinking. 

If they will not stop the abuse you either tolerate it or end it.


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## Livvie (Jan 20, 2014)

Divinely Favored said:


> Biblically you are. Bible says you bodies belong to each other and not to withhold unless you both are in agreement.
> 
> I am referring to someone who's LL is physical intimacy and a spouse deciding they just are not that interrested in sex any longer is no different in a spouse deciding to not speak to their spouse any longer....giving them the silent treatment. After all they are not entitled to your comunication or even your presence either i suppose. Someone on a thread called the silent treatment, emotional abuse and i thought BINGO! that is the word for withholding physical intimacy from your spouse i was thinking.
> 
> If they will not stop the abuse you either tolerate it or end it.


I'm definitely not wanting to defend a sexless or low sex marriage, definitely not.

But you should really, truly realize when giving marriage advice that there are loads of people who don't recognize the bible as anything but just another book, and there are loads of people who have marriages (and view of sex) that have NOTHING to do with religion, the bible, or god.


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## hairyhead (Oct 30, 2015)

It's not abusive per se.

At 47 it could be hormonal related to menopause. At any age it could be loss of desire for the spouse. At any age it could be hormonal related to their normal body chemistry.

Bible pushing doesn't really help. It almost infers consent is not needed and I know that is not a Christian position.

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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

Married4life123 said:


> Sadly, I really dont think finding someone else after 25 yards of marriage is really an option. I would be happy if she would just show some initiative once in a while


Why not? I divorced my ex after 25 years (about your age) and went on to find a far better relationship in every way, but especially w.r.t. sex. I expect you can do far better than your current situation.


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## Hopeful Cynic (Apr 27, 2014)

Sex is supposed to be a mutually enjoyable activity that occurs when both spouses want it. If both spouses don't want it, it doesn't happen, so yes, control does fall to the lower-libido person. That works fine if both partners have similar libidos, which you clearly do not. You are such an outlier that I'm not sure you could ever find a partner with a similar libido. Did you both start out that wildly divergent? Or did it happen over time? When you married her, what was the frequency? Did you secretly think it was too infrequent and marry her anyway? Did you think it would increase over time? And similarly, did she secretly think it was too frequent, but marry you anyways, and think it would decrease over time?

Right now, you are probably coming across to her as making it HER problem to fix, bring her frequency up to meet yours. She feels defensive, and that doesn't create intimacy, it destroys it. But you've come here asking for advice, so in a sense you recognize that you can look at it as YOUR problem instead. Have you considered sex-drive reducing medication? That's as valid as asking her to look into hormonal treatments. Because, honestly, masturbating several times a day in places where you could potentially get caught is verging on a medical and legal problem, and is YOURS to manage.

I would suggest a frank conversation with her about it. Don't let her turn it into an argument that stops the discussion, the way she's gotten away with over the years. Tell her lack of intimacy in the marriage is a problem you both have to solve collaboratively. Make it you and her teamed up against the libido mismatch, not you against her.


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## FloridaGuy1 (Nov 4, 2019)

Forget talking, bail out on her. Seriously, I used to "talk" to my ex all the time about it. She would say OK, agree to everything, sex would be good for a week then the same crap would start all over. Repeated same process for years. I can't tell you how many serious talks we had about it.

My theory is unless you are newly weds, if you have to talk about things like sex, she isn't going to change. She knows what you want and doesn't care.

Get a divorce and find someone who does.


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

Divinely Favored said:


> Right. It is abusive. I heard someone say that about a POed hubby not speaking to his wife and thought that is the word i was thinking about for spouses that withhold sexual intamacy.


Intimacy is for when you want it, not just because your partner needs to get their rocks off.


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

Married4life123 said:


> Sadly, I really dont think finding someone else after 25 yards of marriage is really an option. I would be happy if she would just show some initiative once in a while
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
> [/Q





Married4life123 said:


> Sadly, I really dont think finding someone else after 25 yards of marriage is really an option. I would be happy if she would just show some initiative once in a while
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


This is a matter of context and degrees. 

When I first got with my wife, she was a smoke'n hot, single, no kids, 25 year old former teen model and state-level pageant contestant that was DTF anytime we were together when the cops weren't around. 

We went on to have a home and family and many great years together. 

I know I will never get with someone with those qualifications again. 

However at this point, a first date with a divorced 45 year old with kids that at least looks me in the eye and talks to me in meaningful conversation would be an improvement.


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## LisaDiane (Jul 22, 2019)

oldshirt said:


> However at this point, a first date with a divorced 45 year old with kids that at least looks me in the eye and talks to me in meaningful conversation would be an improvement.


THIS...Exactly...
What is the point of top level "qualifications" anyway, if you cannot create a connection with that person...??

@Married4life123, if you are being rejected in every way by your wife, WHY wouldn't looking for someone who thinks you are special be an option?


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

LisaDiane said:


> THIS...Exactly...
> What is the point of top level "qualifications" anyway, if you cannot create a connection with that person...??


It's a matter of context. When I got with my wife, I was 30 years old and looking to develop a meaningful relationship that could develop into home, marriage, family etc as well as a robust and active sex life. Everything mattered at that time and for those objectives. The person to fit that bill had to check off a whole lot of boxes and my wife did at that time. 

Today at 56 years old with one in college and one in high school, I have no intentions of ever having more kids. An apartment where I don't have to mess with lawns or landscaping or shoveling the driveway ever again sounds awesome so even a house and yard doesn't matter all that much to me. 

And as long as someone takes care of themselves and isn't obese or unkempt and as long as they are attracted to me and are able to support themselves, that's good enough for me now.


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## LisaDiane (Jul 22, 2019)

oldshirt said:


> It's a matter of context. When I got with my wife, I was 30 years old and looking to develop a meaningful relationship that could develop into home, marriage, family etc as well as a robust and active sex life. Everything mattered at that time and for those objectives. The person to fit that bill had to check off a whole lot of boxes and my wife did at that time.
> 
> Today at 56 years old with one in college and one in high school, I have no intentions of ever having more kids. An apartment where I don't have to mess with lawns or landscaping or shoveling the driveway ever again sounds awesome so even a house and yard doesn't matter all that much to me.
> 
> And as long as someone takes care of themselves and isn't obese or unkempt and as long as they are attracted to me and are able to support themselves, that's good enough for me now.


Interesting...!!
I guess for the OP it's a matter of, does he want HIS "boxes" checked, or does he want the connection...

I've never really had "boxes"...I have very few needs for enjoying my life, I could live in a tent or sleep in my car at the beach (you can really do that in California!!) and be happy...and attraction for me has little to do with how a guy looks. I don't care about money or "stuff"...I just want someone who loves sex and loves ME. The rest will take care of itself. 

Of course, for some people, having a list of wants/needs is the way they ensure they find a partner who makes them happy, and that's great for them.

I just think there are way too many diverse, interesting, exciting people out there to have the OP's attitude that there are no options!


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## frusdil (Sep 5, 2013)

Livvie said:


> But you should really, truly realize when giving marriage advice that there are loads of people who don't recognize the bible as anything but just another book, and there are loads of people who have marriages (and view of sex) that have NOTHING to do with religion, the bible, or god.


Exactly. It's ridiculous.

As the saying goes, when you're feeling dumb, remember there are grown adults who actually believe that two penguins walked all the way from Antarctica to the Middle East to get on a boat. Lol.


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## In Absentia (Aug 21, 2012)

But... what's the frequency? I don't think you've told us.


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## LisaDiane (Jul 22, 2019)

Divinely Favored said:


> I am referring to someone who's LL is physical intimacy and a spouse deciding they just are not that interrested in sex any longer is no different in a spouse deciding to not speak to their spouse any longer....giving them the silent treatment. After all they are not entitled to your comunication or even your presence either i suppose. *Someone on a thread called the silent treatment, emotional abuse and i thought BINGO! that is the word for withholding physical intimacy from your spouse i was thinking.
> 
> If they will not stop the abuse you either tolerate it or end it.*


THIS is a terrific point, no matter what anyone believes about religion!!


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

Livvie said:


> I'm definitely not wanting to defend a sexless or low sex marriage, definitely not.
> 
> But you should really, truly realize when giving marriage advice that there are loads of people who don't recognize the bible as anything but just another book, and there are loads of people who have marriages (and view of sex) that have NOTHING to do with religion, the bible, or god.


However his wife clearly does believe in the Bible which is why its relevant.


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## hairyhead (Oct 30, 2015)

Diana7 said:


> However his wife clearly does believe in the Bible which is why its relevant.


Just read his posts again. Can't see where he says or intimates that.

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## MarriedWife (Oct 27, 2020)

In a 33 year marriage with both spouses having different libidos, I can tell you what happened from my own perspective. 

In the beginning, he would want sex daily. I tried to keep up with his "needs" because I felt it was my wifely obligation.

As time went on, and we had children, I couldn't keep up with him anymore and reduced it to 2-3 times per week. He would then start to get mad at me and it would turn into a fight sometimes. I would have sex with him when he fought with me and then I would feel like a prostitute afterwards, just letting him use me.

When you feel like somebody's prostitute, you no longer desire sex because it's not intimate or making love. I lost any desire to have sex with him and completely stopped.

Maybe that can help some people understand.


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## LisaDiane (Jul 22, 2019)

Married4life123 said:


> Sadly, I really dont think finding someone else after 25 yards of marriage is really an option. I would be happy if she would just show some initiative once in a while
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


Unfortunately, she probably never will show any initiative, and the sooner you accept that, the sooner you can make decisions based on your reality. From what you've posted, it sounds like she is perfectly satisfied with the sex that she allows you to have with her, and she is also fine with you not being happy with it. She is unlikely to spontaneously change those feelings. 

If you are unwilling to leave and find a woman who would love having sex with you, you need to make it much clearer to her that you are frustrated and unhappy, and expect her to work on that with you, because THAT is what marriage is ABOUT - BOTH of your needs getting met with compromise on both sides.


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## FloridaGuy1 (Nov 4, 2019)

MarriedWife said:


> In a 33 year marriage with both spouses having different libidos, I can tell you what happened from my own perspective.
> 
> In the beginning, he would want sex daily. I tried to keep up with his "needs" because I felt it was my wifely obligation.
> 
> ...


Just out of curiosity (and not trying to be smart or anything) why couldn't you keep up with him? Did you guys have long drawn out sex sessions or short ones?


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## Evinrude58 (Jun 16, 2014)

I’ve finally reached the age that my libedo isn’t as high as it once was, and have had instances where I was wanted when I didn’t want sex, and although I was madly in love with her and the sex thing was the best I’d ever had——- there were times when I dreaded she might wake up horny. I just didn’t want that at all.

who knows whether OP’s wife just has no desire for sex or if she’s having sexual with someone else?

the only thing I could suggest is to try going to the Dr. Thing is, even if she got some hormones and wanted it all the time, I don’t think it would last. OP, you really need to decide whether sex is a dealbreaker. I think there’s basically no chance she will change. It’s just not going to happen. I’m sorry. Really sorry.

why did you choose to marry a woman that wasn’t really into sex at all from the beginning?


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## FloridaGuy1 (Nov 4, 2019)

click here


Evinrude58 said:


> why did you choose to marry a woman that wasn’t really into sex at all from the beginning?


In all fairness to the OP, I hear that question alot too with both my ex and current wife. BOTH were into sex big time when dating! Oral, anal, you name it! Every day too. Then a year or so into the marriage down to once a week of boring old missionary. 

So when I hear that question, I cringe as many of us had great sex when dating that fizzled out a few years down the road.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Divinely Favored said:


> Biblically you are. Bible says you bodies belong to each other and not to withhold unless you both are in agreement.
> 
> I am referring to someone who's LL is physical intimacy and a spouse deciding they just are not that interrested in sex any longer is no different in a spouse deciding to not speak to their spouse any longer....giving them the silent treatment. After all they are not entitled to your comunication or even your presence either i suppose. Someone on a thread called the silent treatment, emotional abuse and i thought BINGO! that is the word for withholding physical intimacy from your spouse i was thinking.
> 
> If they will not stop the abuse you either tolerate it or end it.



Which is pretty much what I said.


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## 241happyhour (Jan 31, 2011)

@Married4123—We have been married 20 years also and my wife just went and had her hormones checked about 4 months ago. She is 44 and I am 49. She has been on testosterone now for 3 months and it is unbelievable. It’s
like something I can’t explain. It’s pure awesomeness. 


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## CactusLady (Nov 2, 2020)

To the OP. I'm a woman and in your position. My spouse is a once a week if that kind of person. I'd be happy with 3 or 4 a week. 2x a day would be heaven but not going to happen.


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## MarriedWife (Oct 27, 2020)

FloridaGuy1 said:


> Just out of curiosity (and not trying to be smart or anything) why couldn't you keep up with him? Did you guys have long drawn out sex sessions or short ones?


Desire-wise. I also wasn't getting my needs met. Foreplay was non-existent (yes, I spoke up). There was a time, early on, that he only wanted me to preform oral sex. I spoke up and told him I was feeling used that he only wanted oral so he stopped asking for oral and asked for sex instead. I still wasn't getting my needs met even when it switched back from oral to sex. He was a very selfish lover and nobody feels good being used solely for their partner's pleasure. That's not making love. And I got tired of meeting his needs when mine weren't met.

I think that some people don't self reflect when their partner's desire wanes. Sometimes they should.


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## FloridaGuy1 (Nov 4, 2019)

MarriedWife said:


> Desire-wise. I also wasn't getting my needs met. Foreplay was non-existent (yes, I spoke up). There was a time, early on, that he only wanted me to preform oral sex. I spoke up and told him I was feeling used that he only wanted oral so he stopped asking for oral and asked for sex instead. I still wasn't getting my needs met even when it switched back from oral to sex. He was a very selfish lover and nobody feels good being used solely for their partner's pleasure. That's not making love. And I got tired of meeting his needs when mine weren't met.
> 
> I think that some people don't self reflect when their partner's desire wanes. Sometimes they should.


Thanks I appreciate your sharing that.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

MarriedWife said:


> In a 33 year marriage with both spouses having different libidos, I can tell you what happened from my own perspective.
> 
> In the beginning, he would want sex daily. I tried to keep up with his "needs" because I felt it was my wifely obligation.
> 
> ...


Do you no longer have sex with H?

And does he tolerate that, how's it working out?

You kind of gave an example without sharing how it's working.

Tx,


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## MarriedWife (Oct 27, 2020)

Ragnar Ragnasson said:


> Do you no longer have sex with H?
> 
> And does he tolerate that, how's it working out?
> 
> ...


I'm filing for divorce. I should have a long time ago.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

MarriedWife said:


> I'm filing for divorce. I should have a long time ago.


I'm glad you've got an action plan. Yay you!


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## Young at Heart (Jan 6, 2015)

MarriedWife said:


> In a 33 year marriage with both spouses having different libidos, I can tell you what happened from my own perspective.
> 
> In the beginning, he would want sex daily. I tried to keep up with his "needs" because I felt it was my wifely obligation.
> 
> ...


Thank you for your post. If you were able to talk to your spouse to save that marriage could you offer some tips on how you told him? If you divorced over this without telling him, how did you discuss sexual frequency with your other H?

Thank you.


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## MarriedWife (Oct 27, 2020)

Young at Heart said:


> Thank you for your post. If you were able to talk to your spouse to save that marriage could you offer some tips on how you told him? If you divorced over this without telling him, how did you discuss sexual frequency with your other H?
> 
> Thank you.


I told him exactly what I said here. At first he cried and said he never wanted to do that to me. He said he would be happy with once a month. 

I felt he was remorseful and surprised him by initiating sex myself. I thought that he finally understood. Because we were talking divorce at this point, I was willing to try again.

Two days later, after discussing the divorce for several hours, where I was crying most of that time, he asked for sex again. I told him I was not trying to make an excuse but I really didn't want to. He insisted and got his way.

Unfortunately, nothing much has changed. His desire for sex is more important than respect for me.


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## Blondilocks (Jul 4, 2013)

Young at Heart said:


> Thank you for your post. If you were able to talk to your spouse to save that marriage could you offer some tips on how you told him? If you divorced over this without telling him, how did you discuss sexual frequency with your other H?
> 
> Thank you.


I think she has only been married once. See her thread on why she is divorcing him.


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

CactusLady said:


> To the OP. I'm a woman and in your position. My spouse is a once a week if that kind of person. I'd be happy with 3 or 4 a week. 2x a day would be heaven but not going to happen.


He probably has Low T. I had to start T injections at 37.


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

241happyhour said:


> @Married4123—We have been married 20 years also and my wife just went and had her hormones checked about 4 months ago. She is 44 and I am 49. She has been on testosterone now for 3 months and it is unbelievable. It’s
> like something I can’t explain. It’s pure awesomeness.
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


When my wife was trying to get hers lined out after hysterectomy Dr gave her a shot. She said being she is low her body may absorb use it up quickly and if she was feeling low to come back before next appr and get an adjusted dose. After a couple weeks she went back and Dr just gave her anoyher full dose. She was like a 18yr old boy. Insatiable. 

I knew she was more aroused but not to what extent. She easily orgasms with PIV but shortly afterward she was ready to go again. She is in commissioned sales and actually had to take a week off due to her aroused state. She said all she could think about was having sex and could not concentrate on sales. She said she had to change her panties 3x day for them being soaked.😋

WHY DID YOU NOT TELL ME THIS THEN!!!! I WOULD HAVE TAKEN VACATION FROM WORK!!!!😛😁


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

MarriedWife said:


> I told him exactly what I said here. At first he cried and said he never wanted to do that to me. He said he would be happy with once a month.
> 
> I felt he was remorseful and surprised him by initiating sex myself. I thought that he finally understood. Because we were talking divorce at this point, I was willing to try again.
> 
> ...


See the bolded.

You're very likely projecting your opinion as his here, my dear.

That's unusual for a husband when in a good M, and all are working out sexual speed bumps. 

If you continually accuse H of this, your injecting a rot that will weaken the M foundation. Guaranteed. 

A H that wants more sex from W, and if he's not horribly selfish in bed, is a H that wants more intimacy, not less, and his respect only increases.

And, if you think H really agrees that once a month is fine you've already created a new destructive time line.

He's just going along at this stage because you're freaking out and he's a little shell shocked. 

By you condemning him you've created a tangential path for him - one that forces him to realize you're not really with him in the relationship but you're kind of selfish which may make him start looking outside the M for non-stressful conversations and more.

Food for thought.


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