# Spotting the Nymphos



## BioFury

Hey ladies,

Mismatched sex drives is a staple of the forum, so I don't need to go into that. I've been wondering about this for a while, but the thread by @LeananSidhe finally made me put my thoughts out there.

My question is, what are you high drive ladies like? In other areas of your life, that is. How do you see your drive manifesting itself in places other than the bedroom? Whether that be personality, hobbies, dressing habits, career choices, food, exercise, whatever really. What I want to know, is if high drive is completely random, or if there are behavioral similarities among a large percentage of high drive women, that would potentially make them recognizable in the dating pool.

So, would you ladies be willing to give your organic thoughts and observations, as well as a little information about your personality, frequency and type of exercise, diet, etc, etc? Perhaps a pattern will emerge. Oh, and any details you're willing to share about your monthly cycle. Perhaps libido has some type of connection to the hormones responsible for heavy flows, light flows, pain, no pain, regular, irregular, etc.

And, if I can add one more thing, what about your parents marriage? I've always wondered whether a high drive is biologically inherited (to some extent, whether that be parents, or grandparents). Or whether it can be "psychologically inherited" (if that's even a thing). For instance, if the parents prioritize sex highly, but don't necessarily have a high drive, which in turns stimulates highened brain development in that sector of the child. The parent's thoughts become the child's reality, if you will.


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## Faithful Wife

I saw the bat signal and got here as fast as I could!

Nympho here to answer questions.

Not an actual nympho, but I never minded that term, I think it is kind of cute and makes me think of some kind of fairy in the woods who is horny all the time.

Re: My parents...I really don't know. I know they both at one time had a healthy sex drive, but I don't really have any more info than that.

I can say though that I was always boy crazy and a bit sexual, even as a child. And everyone around me obviously was a bit worried about this. They did not shame me though. They seemed to be trying to divert my attention to other things, and to offer advice or support where they thought they needed to....all of which did not have the effect they wanted it to have - but it wasn't a disaster. All in all, understanding what they were dealing with (ie: me), I think they did well in not squashing or shaming my sexuality but at least acknowledging that it made *them* feel uneasy. I understood that part well enough.

Re: my personality...I am an introvert but pretty low on the scale and I can be quite extroverted, especially if it comes to dating/mating/meeting people for that reason. So meeting a guy who may be a potential for me, and if I am free to explore it (ie: don't have to rush home in 5 minutes), I will come across as extroverted, fun and sexy. I will not be aggressive but the vibe I give off is confident, not afraid of anything, and definitely a highly sexual person. I love to laugh and joke around. I can be extremely goofy. I am an optimist. 

Re: my style...if it is appropriate, I will wear next to nothing (ie: beaches, bikinis, tiny dresses/skirts/shorts). I do not shop at Forever 21 though...there are cute barely-there sexy-classy clothes that are not juvenile. If weather doesn't permit this, I still look put together but always sexy. (I can't help it, I'm just drawn that way). I have large-ish breasts but I rarely show cleavage, I am more likely to show lots of leg. No one would say I dress ****ty, and many wouldn't even say I dress sexy. People who are not attracted to me in "that way" don't seem to see me "that way". 

Re: my diet/other...I grew up in gymnastics and dancing, and I actually think that may have been part of why I am so sexual. The exercise and confidence building stuff, plus just flinging yourself half naked around a gym with lot of other half naked people just kind of revs you up. I am still fit and flexible and can tumble, though I do not regularly do any gymnastics. But that early base stuff set the foundation for a great sex life in so many ways! I love it rough and rowdy, and I can take it because I'm so strong and flexible. I eat a fairly balanced diet, nothing out of the ordinary.

Random stuff: I am very kinky, but I am happy with connected vanilla sex, too. I have been mostly in long term monogamous relationships, so my wild and crazy best sex has been with committed partners. I love talking about sex, more than most of my partners have wanted to. I usually have a higher drive for frequency than my partners do (after a settling in period). I love men. I love peens. I love sex. I also love just general touching and groping, and in a relationship I want us to have our hands on each other all the time. I have a dirty mind and dirty jokes/inuendos come to me easily...I have to not say them all the time or I just sound like a ding bat, so I usually just keep them to myself.

Re: recognizing us in the wild....I call this Sexdar. I'm pretty tuned in to it. I can look at men or women and know which ones are highly sexual, with very few clues (sometimes I can tell just by looking alone). I have the advantage of being highly sexual myself. It is like we send a tiny little "ping" to each other in the wild, and then the other responds to our ping in a very slight way but one which we can recognize. It isn't about attraction necessarily. I notice other highly sexual people even if they aren't in my dating or attraction pool. There are a few who will keep their sexuality so close to their chest that although they are highly sexual, they will not pick up on my "ping". Those types, I will still suss out if I have a chance to talk to them a bit. Usually they are "locked down" and that's why they don't catch my "ping".


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti

Faithful Wife said:


> I saw the bat signal and got here as fast as I could!
> 
> Nympho here to answer questions.
> 
> Not an actual nympho, but I never minded that term, I think it is kind of cute and makes me think of some kind of fairy in the woods who is horny all the time.
> 
> Re: My parents...I really don't know. I know they both at one time had a healthy sex drive, but I don't really have any more info than that.
> 
> I can say though that I was always boy crazy and a bit sexual, even as a child. And everyone around me obviously was a bit worried about this. They did not shame me though. They seemed to be trying to divert my attention to other things, and to offer advice or support where they thought they needed to....all of which did not have the effect they wanted it to have - but it wasn't a disaster. All in all, understanding what they were dealing with (ie: me), I think they did well in not squashing or shaming my sexuality but at least acknowledging that it made *them* feel uneasy. I understood that part well enough.
> 
> Re: my personality...I am an introvert but pretty low on the scale and I can be quite extroverted, especially if it comes to dating/mating/meeting people for that reason. So meeting a guy who may be a potential for me, and if I am free to explore it (ie: don't have to rush home in 5 minutes), I will come across as extroverted, fun and sexy. I will not be aggressive but the vibe I give off is confident, not afraid of anything, and definitely a highly sexual person. I love to laugh and joke around. I can be extremely goofy. I am an optimist.
> 
> Re: my style...if it is appropriate, I will wear next to nothing (ie: beaches, bikinis, tiny dresses/skirts/shorts). I do not shop at Forever 21 though...there are cute barely-there sexy-classy clothes that are not juvenile. If weather doesn't permit this, I still look put together but always sexy. (I can't help it, I'm just drawn that way). I have large-ish breasts but I rarely show cleavage, I am more likely to show lots of leg. No one would say I dress ****ty, and many wouldn't even say I dress sexy. People who are not attracted to me in "that way" don't seem to see me "that way".
> 
> Re: my diet/other...I grew up in gymnastics and dancing, and I actually think that may have been part of why I am so sexual. The exercise and confidence building stuff, plus just flinging yourself half naked around a gym with lot of other half naked people just kind of revs you up. I am still fit and flexible and can tumble, though I do not regularly do any gymnastics. But that early base stuff set the foundation for a great sex life in so many ways! I love it rough and rowdy, and I can take it because I'm so strong and flexible. I eat a fairly balanced diet, nothing out of the ordinary.
> 
> Random stuff: I am very kinky, but I am happy with connected vanilla sex, too. I have been mostly in long term monogamous relationships, so my wild and crazy best sex has been with committed partners. I love talking about sex, more than most of my partners have wanted to. I usually have a higher drive for frequency than my partners do (after a settling in period). I love men. I love peens. I love sex. I also love just general touching and groping, and in a relationship I want us to have our hands on each other all the time. I have a dirty mind and dirty jokes/inuendos come to me easily...I have to not say them all the time or I just sound like a ding bat, so I usually just keep them to myself.
> 
> Re: recognizing us in the wild....I call this Sexdar. I'm pretty tuned in to it. I can look at men or women and know which ones are highly sexual, with very few clues (sometimes I can tell just by looking alone). I have the advantage of being highly sexual myself. It is like we send a tiny little "ping" to each other in the wild, and then the other responds to our ping in a very slight way but one which we can recognize. It isn't about attraction necessarily. I notice other highly sexual people even if they aren't in my dating or attraction pool. There are a few who will keep their sexuality so close to their chest that although they are highly sexual, they will not pick up on my "ping". Those types, I will still suss out if I have a chance to talk to them a bit. Usually they are "locked down" and that's why they don't catch my "ping".


Damn, your posts are inspirational! 

Or, at least they would be if I was 30 years younger. 

_If I only knew then what I know now..._


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## I shouldnthave

Funny... I have a feeling its going to be tough to find any patterns here. Well at least my answers are going to be very different than faithful wive's. 

I haven't always been "super sexual" I would say my awakening was around 21-22. I grew up a Tom Boy, and while I had a steady boy friend Jr/Sr year in high school, I would have not called myself highly sexual before then. 

I have always dressed conservatively. I do not show a lot of skin, maybe a tank top on a very hot day, and I have never owned a pair of "short shorts". I do wear dresses frequently, but they are conservatively cut, usually the shortest is just above the knee - so I don't think someone would ever look at my clothes and think "nympho". More girl next door, or business professional. 

Personality wise, I am very very confident and out going. A bit of an extrovert. People often comment on my ease of approaching strangers, being direct, and open. 

I know how to flirt, I can do it with just my eyes, I think one of my favorite things is to make a man squirm by just looking at him. Sometimes I will do this just to toy with someone. But I turn it off and on. When its "off" I feel like I probably could be interpreted as a bit prudish or cold. When I am "on" I can turn heads and get guys clamoring. I have been told that I am a seductress.... 

Hobbies? Avid equestrian who competes in an extremely dangerous sport, and I enjoy cars - spirited drives in the mountains (I have never owned a vehicle with a manual transmission). 

Career? Commercial real estate / finance. I would definitely say I am career oriented. 

Exercise? Comes and goes - I always ride or hike 5 days a week - when I am on a fitness kick I will run 5-6 days a week, other times I slip into couch potato ways. 

Food? Oh boy, I love the indulgences in life. Good sex, good food, and good drink. I enjoy fine food, and cooking. Food wise I am adventurous and will try anything once (if its really weird, I ask to be told after I eat it!). Very far from picky, and enjoy things many freak out about (super stinky cheese, cured fish, stuff like that). I try to keep it healthy, but indulge eating out about once a week. And I enjoy cocktails, wine, beer - I will drink once to twice a week on "dates" with my husband. 

My parents divorced when I was young - but ahhh, I would describe them both as sexual people. I was raised in a sex positive environment, a copy of joy of sex on the book self, and condoms in the closet. It was always made clear to me that there should be no shame or guilt associated with sex. Just make good choices and take measures to protect your health. My dad remarried when I was in my teens and have a fabulous marriage with my step mom. Oh, and my dad has always been a huge influence in my life, I am very close to him. 

In the end, I have always been the higher drive in every relationship I have had. My husband calls me his little nympho. I don't know if I would call myself kinky (thats all relative) but we have an exciting and uninhibited sex life.

Oh, last but not least - I do not have kids. Never wanted kids, for a plethora of reason, but kids affects on sex lives and relationships is right up there.


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## Married but Happy

Faithful Wife said:


> I saw the bat signal and got here as fast as I could!
> 
> Nympho here to answer questions.


LOL You and my wife could be twins! Sure, there are some differences, but you appear to have the same basic attitude and personality.

it was clear to me almost immediately that she was (and still is) a highly sexual person. I can't usually perceive this immediately, but i do pick up on it fairly quickly if I spend time with someone. I just wish I'd learned how to do that when I was younger, before I met my first wife ....


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## BioFury

Faithful Wife said:


> I saw the bat signal and got here as fast as I could!
> 
> Nympho here to answer questions.
> 
> Not an actual nympho, but I never minded that term, I think it is kind of cute and makes me think of some kind of fairy in the woods who is horny all the time.


Lol :grin2: I knew I could rely on you. 



> Re: My parents...I really don't know. I know they both at one time had a healthy sex drive, but I don't really have any more info than that.


What about your children, if any? Have you noticed an kind of libido similarities? I'd be thrilled if they'd be able to make a long term in-depth study out of this, but I wouldn't think there'd be too many entire families who are willing to participate in a long-term study on libido inheritance.



> I can say though that I was always boy crazy and a bit sexual, even as a child. And everyone around me obviously was a bit worried about this. They did not shame me though. They seemed to be trying to divert my attention to other things, and to offer advice or support where they thought they needed to....all of which did not have the effect they wanted it to have - but it wasn't a disaster. All in all, understanding what they were dealing with (ie: me), I think they did well in not squashing or shaming my sexuality but at least acknowledging that it made *them* feel uneasy. I understood that part well enough.
> 
> Re: my personality...I am an introvert but pretty low on the scale and I can be quite extroverted, especially if it comes to dating/mating/meeting people for that reason. So meeting a guy who may be a potential for me, and if I am free to explore it (ie: don't have to rush home in 5 minutes), I will come across as extroverted, fun and sexy. I will not be aggressive but the vibe I give off is confident, not afraid of anything, and definitely a highly sexual person. I love to laugh and joke around. I can be extremely goofy. I am an optimist.
> 
> Re: my style...if it is appropriate, I will wear next to nothing (ie: beaches, bikinis, tiny dresses/skirts/shorts). I do not shop at Forever 21 though...there are cute barely-there sexy-classy clothes that are not juvenile. If weather doesn't permit this, I still look put together but always sexy. (I can't help it, I'm just drawn that way). I have large-ish breasts but I rarely show cleavage, I am more likely to show lots of leg. No one would say I dress ****ty, and many wouldn't even say I dress sexy. People who are not attracted to me in "that way" don't seem to see me "that way".
> 
> Re: my diet/other...I grew up in gymnastics and dancing, and I actually think that may have been part of why I am so sexual. The exercise and confidence building stuff, plus just flinging yourself half naked around a gym with lot of other half naked people just kind of revs you up. I am still fit and flexible and can tumble, though I do not regularly do any gymnastics. But that early base stuff set the foundation for a great sex life in so many ways! I love it rough and rowdy, and I can take it because I'm so strong and flexible. I eat a fairly balanced diet, nothing out of the ordinary.


Ok, so your sexual interest is often verbally expressed, albeit subtly, in the dating scene. You're not one of those librarian cello players who transforms into a monster the moment the door is closed :grin2: Extreme interest in boys is also interesting. I've always been obsessed with girls, but I guess I thought that represented everyone's experiences. But I guess not. Might be an indicator, though that interest could be an expression of a completely different need - not a sexual one.

Physical fitness... I have to wonder whether it's one of those things where you're habits and choices as a child, create a particular trait as an adult. For instance, if the exercise resulted in a highly active hormone center. Oh, that's an interesting thought. If I may ask, what has your monthly cycle been like throughout your life?



> Random stuff: I am very kinky, but I am happy with connected vanilla sex, too. I have been mostly in long term monogamous relationships, so my wild and crazy best sex has been with committed partners. I love talking about sex, more than most of my partners have wanted to. I usually have a higher drive for frequency than my partners do (after a settling in period). I love men. I love peens. I love sex. I also love just general touching and groping, and in a relationship I want us to have our hands on each other all the time. I have a dirty mind and dirty jokes/inuendos come to me easily...I have to not say them all the time or I just sound like a ding bat, so I usually just keep them to myself.
> 
> Re: recognizing us in the wild....I call this Sexdar. I'm pretty tuned in to it. I can look at men or women and know which ones are highly sexual, with very few clues (sometimes I can tell just by looking alone). I have the advantage of being highly sexual myself. It is like we send a tiny little "ping" to each other in the wild, and then the other responds to our ping in a very slight way but one which we can recognize. It isn't about attraction necessarily. I notice other highly sexual people even if they aren't in my dating or attraction pool. There are a few who will keep their sexuality so close to their chest that although they are highly sexual, they will not pick up on my "ping". Those types, I will still suss out if I have a chance to talk to them a bit. Usually they are "locked down" and that's why they don't catch my "ping".


I know how you feel, I'm the same way. Which is one reason for this thread. Aside from curiosity, I'd like to end up with someone who's just as touchy and sex obsessed as myself. But I currently have no way of reliably pursuing that outcome. My sexdar must be broken, lol. Because it all just seems random. Person A is a maniac while dating, but dries up after marriage. Person B is meh, but awakens and becomes a maniac after marriage. Then you have everything in between.

But the extreme interest in boys might actually be a thing, now that I think about it more. An old woman who's a friend of mine is a insatiable, and she was nothing but boys, boys, boys when she was younger. I was the same way with girls, so perhaps that's some kind of constant.


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## Buddy400

The problem is that some women, like @LeananSidhe, were high drive, low drive, no drive and then very high drive at different stages of their life.


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## Faithful Wife

Rocky Mountain Yeti said:


> Damn, your posts are inspirational!
> 
> Or, at least they would be if I was 30 years younger.
> 
> _If I only knew then what I know now..._


When I was 30 years younger, I was not where I am now with a lot of things. It was immature and not fully self aware yet. However, I did always know I loved and wanted sex. The world was a confusing place to me at the time, how to navigate it and meet people who would be a good match wasn't as clear to me as it is now. I usually stumbled my way using instincts and kind of found what I was looking for (usually), but at the time I didn't know what had made things work sometimes and not others. The young men in my life were just as clueless at that time, and I did not have any kind of mentor or teacher. So stumbling through it was my only path.

One thing that was easy for me then and now and didn't need any mentoring or learning was feeling mutual attraction with someone. I know and can feel when there is a high level of mutual attraction. I can also feel when the attraction is more on one side than the other, no matter which side. It was easy for me then to not bother with people who felt less or more attraction to me than I felt for them. Mutual attraction is a huge key for me. When it is there, it is bright and sparkly, and it is a HUGE factor in my sexuality when in a relationship. When it is not there in the same level on both sides, nothing ever went right for me if I entered a relationship (sexual or not) with that person. I have to feel huge attraction for someone and know they also feel it for me, on a daily basis, in order to keep wanting sex all the time with that person. If that attraction wasn't there or changed somehow, I didn't want sex with that partner at all. I would still want sex, just not with them.

I think people over look strong mutual attraction as a part of this discussion. For me it simply has to be there, even though I'm highly sexual whether it is there or it isn't. My motivation to want to have sex with one particular person over and over depends on that juice I feel from the strong mutual attraction. My desire to be sexual all the time is not motivated by anything, it is just there and always has been. But I do not want to be sexual with someone who I don't have strong mutual attraction with. My body just shuts down, and it won't matter how many skills they have or whatever. And when I'm talking about mutual attraction in this sense I do mean things other than physical attraction, but that has to be there first and it has to be there strong. I want to salivate when I see him getting out of the shower, and I want him to salivate when he sees me. Nothing less than this will do for a long term sexual relationship with me.


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## Faithful Wife

BioFury said:


> Physical fitness... I have to wonder whether it's one of those things where you're habits and choices as a child, create a particular trait as an adult. For instance, if the exercise resulted in a highly active hormone center. Oh, that's an interesting thought. If I may ask, what has your monthly cycle been like throughout your life?


Gymnastics in particular seems very sexy-inducing. The leotards, the incredible things people can do with their bodies, the amazing show of strength...all of this is a turn on to me and was while I was a child. I'm sure at the same time, the exercise itself was building good things in my brain and body that assisted with my sexual nature. I was also in competitive dance, which was also very sexy and glamorous to me at the time.

My periods were never regular, but they also were never much of a problem (didn't have horrible symptoms or abnormal flow like other women I've known). My menopause has been amazing with no bad side effects other than hot flashes (for several years now). OMG it is so awesome not to have periods anymore!!!! Even though mine were minimal hassle compared to others, just not having them at all is incredible!


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## Faithful Wife

Buddy400 said:


> The problem is that some women, like @LeananSidhe, were high drive, low drive, no drive and then very high drive at different stages of their life.


This is true, and I can't speak for women whose drive has fluctuated. Mine has always been constant. So as far as real nyphos who always were nyphos and always will be, I'm here to represent.


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti

Faithful Wife said:


> When I was 30 years younger, I was not where I am now with a lot of things. It was immature and not fully self aware yet. However, I did always know I loved and wanted sex. The world was a confusing place to me at the time, how to navigate it and meet people who would be a good match wasn't as clear to me as it is now. I usually stumbled my way using instincts and kind of found what I was looking for (usually), but at the time I didn't know what had made things work sometimes and not others. The young men in my life were just as clueless at that time, and I did not have any kind of mentor or teacher. So stumbling through it was my only path.
> 
> One thing that was easy for me then and now and didn't need any mentoring or learning was feeling mutual attraction with someone. I know and can feel when there is a high level of mutual attraction. I can also feel when the attraction is more on one side than the other, no matter which side. It was easy for me then to not bother with people who felt less or more attraction to me than I felt for them. Mutual attraction is a huge key for me. When it is there, it is bright and sparkly, and it is a HUGE factor in my sexuality when in a relationship. When it is not there in the same level on both sides, nothing ever went right for me if I entered a relationship (sexual or not) with that person. I have to feel huge attraction for someone and know they also feel it for me, on a daily basis, in order to keep wanting sex all the time with that person. If that attraction wasn't there or changed somehow, I didn't want sex with that partner at all. I would still want sex, just not with them.
> 
> I think people over look strong mutual attraction as a part of this discussion. For me it simply has to be there, even though I'm highly sexual whether it is there or it isn't. My motivation to want to have sex with one particular person over and over depends on that juice I feel from the strong mutual attraction. My desire to be sexual all the time is not motivated by anything, it is just there and always has been. But I do not want to be sexual with someone who I don't have strong mutual attraction with. My body just shuts down, and it won't matter how many skills they have or whatever. And when I'm talking about mutual attraction in this sense I do mean things other than physical attraction, but that has to be there first and it has to be there strong. I want to salivate when I see him getting out of the shower, and I want him to salivate when he sees me. Nothing less than this will do for a long term sexual relationship with me.


What was inspirational was the way your whole description of self runs so counter to the commonly accepted narrative that people of our generation usually grow up with with regard to female sexuality. 

The first level of narrative that did a great disservice was that women don't really enjoy sex. 

The next level was that women tolerate sex to get the other things they want in life (i.e. kids, financial stability, diamonds and clothes, etc).

The next level was that of those very few who actually enjoy sex, they are incapable of fidelity. They were pejoratively labeled as ****s and consequently were not to be trusted under any circumstances. 

Some of us were wise or aware enough to know better, but as overwhelming as that narrative was, it couldn't not influence most of our generation, as well as those generations who came before. 

And what a dark, depressing vision of sexuality it was! 

It's inspiring that that truth isn't so dark. Romantic relationships need not be the mere barter of love for sex of material goods for sex, etc. Both partners CAN have both emotional AND sexual fulfillment. How awesome to think a woman can be highly sexual AND loyal! 

Hopefully, the current generation is being raised under a more enlightened approach.


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## Faithful Wife

Rocky Mountain Yeti said:


> What was inspirational was the way your whole description of self runs so counter to the commonly accepted narrative that people of our generation usually grow up with with regard to female sexuality.
> 
> The first level of narrative that did a great disservice was that women don't really enjoy sex.
> 
> The next level was that women tolerate sex to get the other things they want in life (i.e. kids, financial stability, diamonds and clothes, etc).
> 
> The next level was that of those very few who actually enjoy sex, they are incapable of fidelity. They were pejoratively labeled as ****s and consequently were not to be trusted under any circumstances.
> 
> Some of us were wise or aware enough to know better, but as overwhelming as that narrative was, it couldn't not influence most of our generation, as well as those generations who came before.
> 
> And what a dark, depressing vision of sexuality it was!


All of that ^^ just confused the hell out of me as I was growing up and feeling so sexual, yet the world wanted to pretend that only men want sex and all that bull crap. It just annoyed me so much. It makes me appreciate my family so much the more now, because they did not toss me out and shame me. They wanted to protect me from what they knew the world would say about me! I get that now.

For the most part, in my early adulthood I just ignored and rejected all of the dark twisted ideas people had about women's sexuality and instead I focused on how awesome sex is - and how much I love it - and how can I get more of it? - and how can I do it better? 

I encountered so many men who were/are turned off by me, too. Other than those who simply aren't/weren't attracted to me, I mean the ones who got the vibe of how I am and then would instantly show fear on their face and flee as fast as possible. I'm sure those boys had been told about "girls like me" and to stay away from us. I couldn't blame them, you know? How could they have known any better if they were taught to fear highly sexual females? This happened so frequently that I used to scoff at people who would say "men are dogs, they are down to do anything that moves". Um really? Yeah, no. A lot of men are simply decent and don't want to screw "anything", but also a lot of guys have their own very narrow set of parameters they will allow of how sexual a woman can be before it turns them off. Again - - these guys were raised this way, they were told to fear us. And there are a LOT of them. And no, most of them will not just bang some chick in a bar. And also, the ones that will bang some chick in a bar are not out there in the huge numbers that people say they are. 

Everywhere I went, the world did not look like these lies people were saying. So I went with what reality was showing me instead of what they were saying.

More recently, there is a lot less of the "only men want sex" hype and a lot more understanding that all men are not slavering dogs.


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## Married but Happy

BioFury said:


> What about your children?


I don't think my parents were very sexual, but they could have hidden it _very_ well, if they were. I don't think my son is, either, from what I've seen of his dating experiences and marriage. So, I'd guess it's only partly genetic, and may have more to do with gestational hormones and - perhaps - examples and experiences while young.


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## Married but Happy

Faithful Wife said:


> I encountered so many men who were/are turned off by me, too. Other than those who simply aren't/weren't attracted to me, I mean the ones who got the vibe of how I am and then would instantly show fear on their face and flee as fast as possible. I'm sure those boys had been told about "girls like me" and to stay away from us. I couldn't blame them, you know? How could they have known any better if they were taught to fear highly sexual females? This happened so frequently that I used to scoff at people who would say "men are dogs, they are down to do anything that moves". Um really? Yeah, no.


Yeah, I've noticed that in some of my gender. They talk a good game, but when the opportunity arises to live it, they go with someone "safe" where they aren't threatened with performance anxiety. Fortunately, I wasn't taught anything about female sexuality, so I had to learn for myself and form my own preferences. I am highly selective, and have learned to wait for that great sexual match - plus all the other great stuff, of course! Unfortunately, it took one bad marriage to learn all the lessons.


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## john117

It helps to identify the likely environment for said expectations... If your frame of reference is friends, family, the PTO, and church, don't bother. If you're in college, it's easier. Mostly. Work... Risky regardless.

The huge place dd2 lives is full of young professionals, medical students, or med residents. A lot of material, but unlikely that your friendly neighbor the ENT resident will have any time no matter how much she smiles when you hold the elevator.

Look for self selection above all. Groups, meetups, the usual dating scenes, and such. 

When my girls were undergrad there were plenty of classmates that were alleged to be in the group. But go past 25 or so years and things begin to change.


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## ReformedHubby

Ha, ha. Good for you for realizing that nymphos are more fun. The whole good girl thing is over rated. Life is too short. I think for some men a sexually liberated woman is too much. They are missing out. They feel like it makes them more likely to cheat. I don't think freaky or kinky etc. has anything to do with that. In fact I would actually worry more about someone that is repressed sexually. You'll learn to recognize them on your own in time. Its hard to describe, there really is no "type", just a feel, and honestly truth be told, half the time they'll find you. Nympho does not mean lack of commitment, I love my absurdly kinky girlfriend, and she loves me. Even learned some new tricks!


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## Faithful Wife

ReformedHubby said:


> Ha, ha. Good for you for realizing that nymphos are more fun. The whole good girl thing is over rated. Life is too short. I think for some men a sexually liberated woman is too much. They are missing out. They feel like it makes them more likely to cheat. I don't think freaky or kinky etc. has anything to do with that. In fact I would actually worry more about someone that is repressed sexually. You'll learn to recognize them on your own in time. Its hard to describe, there really is no "type", just a feel, and honestly truth be told, *half the time they'll find you*. Nympho does not mean lack of commitment, I love my absurdly kinky girlfriend, and she loves me. Even learned some new tricks!


As to the bolded, we can't see the guys who won't "ping" us back. But then again, most who don't ping us back aren't that sexual anyway (or are afraid of sexual women).

Also, I have no problem with men not wanting to engage in a particular sexual activity or kink, that in itself does not say to me that the guy is afraid of highly sexual women. Some kinks just don't do it for some people and there's no point in "trying to accommodate". Since I am the same way, I'm all good with that. For instance, if a man is super hot to me and all the other bells are clicking, but he is a sadist or into something like blood play or torture or a few other things that are a turn off to me, it doesn't mean that I'm not as sexual as that guy or that I fear his sexuality. It just means what he is into doesn't turn me on. When something I am into doesn't turn a guy on, I'm good with that, and there are a LOT of things I'm into that most guys are not. I know where and when I can unleash myself. I don't hold it against others that they aren't into it/me.

It is at another level that I feel fear and judgment from a guy. And it is always about them, not me. When it is about me (like if they simply aren't attracted to me), then I know and feel this (and it is still ok). When it is about them, it feels totally different when they run or show the fear. It feels like they are seeing right past me, not me at all. They are looking at whatever the monster highly sexual female prototype is in their minds, based on whatever they learned or believe. That prototype is not me, so it never feels like me they are responding to. Again - this is totally different than just not being into me personally for other reasons, or not into me because my kink turns them off.


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## sunsetmist

@Faithful Wife

I think a defining, important piece is that you know and like/love yourself, are genuine, make no excuses, expect to enjoy life to the fullest. This state of being is harder to attain than many realize. Congrats!


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## TheDudeLebowski

Faithful Wife said:


> I saw the bat signal and got here as fast as I could!
> 
> Nympho here to answer questions.
> 
> Not an actual nympho, but I never minded that term, I think it is kind of cute and makes me think of some kind of fairy in the woods who is horny all the time.
> 
> Re: My parents...I really don't know. I know they both at one time had a healthy sex drive, but I don't really have any more info than that.
> 
> I can say though that I was always boy crazy and a bit sexual, even as a child. And everyone around me obviously was a bit worried about this. They did not shame me though. They seemed to be trying to divert my attention to other things, and to offer advice or support where they thought they needed to....all of which did not have the effect they wanted it to have - but it wasn't a disaster. All in all, understanding what they were dealing with (ie: me), I think they did well in not squashing or shaming my sexuality but at least acknowledging that it made *them* feel uneasy. I understood that part well enough.
> 
> Re: my personality...I am an introvert but pretty low on the scale and I can be quite extroverted, especially if it comes to dating/mating/meeting people for that reason. So meeting a guy who may be a potential for me, and if I am free to explore it (ie: don't have to rush home in 5 minutes), I will come across as extroverted, fun and sexy. I will not be aggressive but the vibe I give off is confident, not afraid of anything, and definitely a highly sexual person. I love to laugh and joke around. I can be extremely goofy. I am an optimist.
> 
> Re: my style...if it is appropriate, I will wear next to nothing (ie: beaches, bikinis, tiny dresses/skirts/shorts). I do not shop at Forever 21 though...there are cute barely-there sexy-classy clothes that are not juvenile. If weather doesn't permit this, I still look put together but always sexy. (I can't help it, I'm just drawn that way). I have large-ish breasts but I rarely show cleavage, I am more likely to show lots of leg. No one would say I dress ****ty, and many wouldn't even say I dress sexy. People who are not attracted to me in "that way" don't seem to see me "that way".
> 
> Re: my diet/other...I grew up in gymnastics and dancing, and I actually think that may have been part of why I am so sexual. The exercise and confidence building stuff, plus just flinging yourself half naked around a gym with lot of other half naked people just kind of revs you up. I am still fit and flexible and can tumble, though I do not regularly do any gymnastics. But that early base stuff set the foundation for a great sex life in so many ways! I love it rough and rowdy, and I can take it because I'm so strong and flexible. I eat a fairly balanced diet, nothing out of the ordinary.
> 
> Random stuff: I am very kinky, but I am happy with connected vanilla sex, too. I have been mostly in long term monogamous relationships, so my wild and crazy best sex has been with committed partners. I love talking about sex, more than most of my partners have wanted to. I usually have a higher drive for frequency than my partners do (after a settling in period). I love men. I love peens. I love sex. I also love just general touching and groping, and in a relationship I want us to have our hands on each other all the time. I have a dirty mind and dirty jokes/inuendos come to me easily...I have to not say them all the time or I just sound like a ding bat, so I usually just keep them to myself.
> 
> Re: recognizing us in the wild....I call this Sexdar. I'm pretty tuned in to it. I can look at men or women and know which ones are highly sexual, with very few clues (sometimes I can tell just by looking alone). I have the advantage of being highly sexual myself. It is like we send a tiny little "ping" to each other in the wild, and then the other responds to our ping in a very slight way but one which we can recognize. It isn't about attraction necessarily. I notice other highly sexual people even if they aren't in my dating or attraction pool. There are a few who will keep their sexuality so close to their chest that although they are highly sexual, they will not pick up on my "ping". Those types, I will still suss out if I have a chance to talk to them a bit. Usually they are "locked down" and that's why they don't catch my "ping".


I got half a chubby just reading this. 0:whip:


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## Faithful Wife

sunsetmist said:


> @Faithful Wife
> 
> I think a defining, important piece is that you know and like/love yourself, are genuine, make no excuses, expect to enjoy life to the fullest. This state of being is harder to attain than many realize. Congrats!


Thank you, my parents taught me this. They taught me to love and accept myself and gave me good self esteem.

But they also knew that for me, this was going to have to include the same sexually curious frisky-ness that they also wished they could tamp down in me. They only wanted to tamp it down because they were worried for my rep, and theirs as parents, and were worried that I would put myself in harms way due to ignorance combined with that high level of frisky-ness. And I don’t blame them. I’m sure it was quite scary for them. 

So they did a very good job considering how conflicted they must have felt. They wanted me to be true to myself but that included this frisky-ness that was potentially damaging.

The best thing they did though was make me feel like they were just going to trust me to make good choices and that actually gave me the room to make mostly good choices. I’m a happy well adjusted extremely sexual adult now, and their acceptance of me, fears and all, was very important to my journey. 

They never ever said that sex was “bad” or used any shameful language, by the way. They expressed their concerns to me in language that reflected their actual fears, not in language that made me think they were out of touch with sexuality. When adults speak to children as if sex or sexual feelings are bad or shameful dangerous in general, the child immediately starts conflating bad things with sex, before they have even had a chance to know what sex is!

But kids know instinctively that there is a whole world of pleasure in their bodies and they are urged toward experiencing something really important and amazing in with their bodies. So when adults other than my parents said things that were shaming about sex or sexual feelings, I just knew they were full of crap. I knew there was something amazing going on in my body and there was no way in the world that it was shameful. They should be ashamed for saying something so stupid, is pretty much how I felt.

My parents never made sex be the “bad guy” in the whole thing. I think that’s really important for parents to understand.


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## Blaine

Since we are talking to a group of high drive women can I ask your normal number or orgasms for a good sexual encounter or a great one? Anyone have a way of describing the intensity of their normal orgasms or for really good one? Everything from toe curling, leg shaking, screaming to passing out?


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## Faithful Wife

Blaine said:


> Since we are talking to a group of high drive women can I ask your normal number or orgasms for a good sexual encounter or a great one? Anyone have a way of describing the intensity of their normal orgasms or for really good one? Everything from toe curling, leg shaking, screaming to passing out?


I hope others will answer this one because it’s not about orgasms for me. Never has been. It’s always been about penetration, my favorite thing in the world, and I don’t O from it. It’s the friction, the slow and fast, the pounding, the soft barely perceptible moves in and out. All of that. O or no, I want the penetration and lots of it in different ways.


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## BioFury

I shouldnthave said:


> Funny... I have a feeling its going to be tough to find any patterns here. Well at least my answers are going to be very different than faithful wive's.
> 
> I haven't always been "super sexual" I would say my awakening was around 21-22. I grew up a Tom Boy, and while I had a steady boy friend Jr/Sr year in high school, I would have not called myself highly sexual before then.
> 
> I have always dressed conservatively. I do not show a lot of skin, maybe a tank top on a very hot day, and I have never owned a pair of "short shorts". I do wear dresses frequently, but they are conservatively cut, usually the shortest is just above the knee - so I don't think someone would ever look at my clothes and think "nympho". More girl next door, or business professional.
> 
> Personality wise, I am very very confident and out going. A bit of an extrovert. People often comment on my ease of approaching strangers, being direct, and open.
> 
> I know how to flirt, I can do it with just my eyes, I think one of my favorite things is to make a man squirm by just looking at him. Sometimes I will do this just to toy with someone. But I turn it off and on. When its "off" I feel like I probably could be interpreted as a bit prudish or cold. When I am "on" I can turn heads and get guys clamoring. I have been told that I am a seductress....
> 
> Hobbies? Avid equestrian who competes in an extremely dangerous sport, and I enjoy cars - spirited drives in the mountains (I have never owned a vehicle with a manual transmission).
> 
> Career? Commercial real estate / finance. I would definitely say I am career oriented.
> 
> Exercise? Comes and goes - I always ride or hike 5 days a week - when I am on a fitness kick I will run 5-6 days a week, other times I slip into couch potato ways.
> 
> Food? Oh boy, I love the indulgences in life. Good sex, good food, and good drink. I enjoy fine food, and cooking. Food wise I am adventurous and will try anything once (if its really weird, I ask to be told after I eat it!). Very far from picky, and enjoy things many freak out about (super stinky cheese, cured fish, stuff like that). I try to keep it healthy, but indulge eating out about once a week. And I enjoy cocktails, wine, beer - I will drink once to twice a week on "dates" with my husband.
> 
> My parents divorced when I was young - but ahhh, I would describe them both as sexual people. I was raised in a sex positive environment, a copy of joy of sex on the book self, and condoms in the closet. It was always made clear to me that there should be no shame or guilt associated with sex. Just make good choices and take measures to protect your health. My dad remarried when I was in my teens and have a fabulous marriage with my step mom. Oh, and my dad has always been a huge influence in my life, I am very close to him.
> 
> In the end, I have always been the higher drive in every relationship I have had. My husband calls me his little nympho. I don't know if I would call myself kinky (thats all relative) but we have an exciting and uninhibited sex life.
> 
> Oh, last but not least - I do not have kids. Never wanted kids, for a plethora of reason, but kids affects on sex lives and relationships is right up there.


So you were not a "boys, boys boys" type of girl when you were young? Do you remember if there was a triggering event that caused your awakening?

Did you engage in a lot of exercise as a child? What about your monthly cycle, if I may ask?


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## Herschel

I can’t speak for her and what she thinks, but my girl friend is a bone fide nympho. At first I just thought it was new relationship hot and heavy. But it didn’t stop and it’s all she wants (which can be tough since we got 6 kids between us). All I have to do is just grab her butt and she turns around and is like, let’s go up stairs, you just made me so wet or anything like that. It’s lretty crazy since she looks like just a suburban mom. She is goofy and sweet and pays for peoples food at the convenience store when they don’t have enough. But she wants my **** all the time and I have never seen anyone always so wet as she is. I have to keep her stocked on liquids. Don’t even get me started on how she demands anal. 🤷*♀


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## ReformedHubby

One thing that is unique about dating a "nympho" is that its kind of the opposite of the "She did it for him, but not for me" threads on here. You know you're not in Kansas anymore when as a man that is very experienced you are considered the "prude" or vanilla person in the relationship. There will be things she has done in the past that you will find shocking, she would love to do those things with you (provided she feels you have what it takes in you), but you may not be into it. The cool thing is women don't make a big deal out of it at all. Assuming she is highly attracted to you, and there is good chemistry, she will still enjoy sex with you. Very few have kinks that are deal breakers or that would cause resentment if you won't do them.


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## Ynot

Man here, but I have experienced a few nymphos since my divorce. When I was married I used to have to rub one out thinking about some of the things I wanted to do with my wife. Since I have gotten divorced I now realize that I have no fantasies that have I have not tried in real life. So thank you nymphos, wherever you are! 
While almost every woman has been highly sexual at the beginning of the relationship, it seems with the nymphos they just keep looking for more. As someone else said, it took me a while to try to catch up to her (I never really did, but I tried). I was vanilla in the relationship. I guess she enjoyed some of the things I do/did, because a year later she still reaches out from time to time for more.


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## I shouldnthave

BioFury said:


> So you were not a "boys, boys boys" type of girl when you were young? Do you remember if there was a triggering event that caused your awakening?
> 
> Did you engage in a lot of exercise as a child? What about your monthly cycle, if I may ask?


No, it definitely was not "boys boys boys" - I was a bit of a Tom boy myself, and the majority of my friends were boys. I love guys, love men, love their company, friendship, I have always connected well with guys. My first "best friend" was Jake back in kindergarten. All growing up I had close platonic guy friends.

As a child I did engage in a lot of exercise. I lived in the country and walked miles through hilly country every day. All summer I swam for hours before riding my horse the rest of the day - always very active and outdoorsy - and fit and strong. In my teen years I became serious about equestrian competition and literally trained 7 days a week, often before and after school.

Awakening? Hum, at 20 I had this amazing FWB - we went on what I would call a sexual journey together. Found heights I never dreamed possible, and I suppose that really lit my fire.

As for my cycle, I do not remember tracking it much when I was young. I know in my late teens early 20s it wasn't totally regular, because occasionally I would have a pregnancy freak out because I was late.... But it always eventually came.

Since about 30 I have been meticulously tracking and I am pretty darn regular, a day or two early or late, otherwise like clockwork.


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## 269370

BioFury said:


> My question is, what are you high drive ladies like? In other areas of your life, that is.



Go to the library...That’s the unofficial hideout place for all the nymphos. 

In short, I think I can spot them (shy, usually introverted, sometimes can see a twinkle in their eyes when making a dirty joke). But maybe it’s just my imagination.

The ones who are actually showing openly how much they like sex, are often just acting to get attention from men. This was my experience in the past anyway.

Sorry this is a terrible generalisation but you asked a very general question...

In truth, there is no one ‘nympho’ type. A nympho is someone who likes sex a lot but that could be my wife who likes sex a lot only with me and only under certain circumstances/conditions or it could be someone who has a physical/hormonal ‘problem’/imbalance and would **** anything that moves or orgasm riding a bus.

There is also nothing more reassuring than thinking you are marrying a nympho only to find out that 5 years later (and after 3 babies) that ‘I’m really really tired and have a headache to still be a nympho’.



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## personofinterest

For inmyprime:

https://youtu.be/WTuyoOyWh0c


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## LeananSidhe

Buddy400 said:


> The problem is that some women, like @LeananSidhe, were high drive, low drive, no drive and then very high drive at different stages of their life.


As I’ve mentioned, probably 100 times now, my sex drive fluctuations were due to birth control. I have a naturally high drive but I react poorly (or not depending on how you look at it) to hormonal birth control. I don’t know why.


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## JustTheWife

I'm kind of kinky in my fantasies and stuff that i've done in the past. I've also been promiscuous. Very submissive. Think about sex a lot. Not sure if that's what you mean by nynpho. 

I'm very shy and introverted but I can be bubbly and when I'm nervous I laugh/giggle a lot. I'm usually kind of nervous in social situations. Not really so sure of myself. I dress conservatively and I'm very religious. I don't have any tattoos or any piercings of any kind. I went to college.

I'm not a "wild" type and I don't take many risks in life except with sex. I look and act really innocent. People say I'm "cute". Just like a normal girl, i guess.

I keep in good shape but i'm not obsessive about it. I jog regularly and go to the gym. I eat pretty well too.


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## 269370

JustTheWife said:


> I'm kind of kinky in my fantasies and stuff that i've done in the past. I've also been promiscuous. Very submissive. Think about sex a lot. Not sure if that's what you mean by nynpho.
> 
> 
> 
> I'm very shy and introverted but I can be bubbly and when I'm nervous I laugh/giggle a lot. I'm usually kind of nervous in social situations. Not really so sure of myself. I dress conservatively and I'm very religious. I don't have any tattoos or any piercings of any kind. I went to college.
> 
> 
> 
> I'm not a "wild" type and I don't take many risks in life except with sex. I look and act really innocent. People say I'm "cute". Just like a normal girl, i guess.
> 
> 
> 
> I keep in good shape but i'm not obsessive about it. I jog regularly and go to the gym. I eat pretty well too.




Yes, that’s the ‘prototype’ I was talking about (or one of them). This one’s hard to spot but I used to really enjoy trying back in school! (And was usually right!) Still enjoy it sometimes and find it endearing (when a woman can’t do anything about the fact that her body just...wants something).

I married (and lost my virginity) also to an introvert but loyalty was the no1 thing I was looking for in a partner. I saw too many people’s hearts getting ripped out. 
I also always believed in the idea that everyone has a ‘little nympho’ inside of them somewhere. And found it exciting to have the challenge to tease it out. 
It seems my wife has it in her. Unless I am completely insane!!!

May I borrow a book now ? 


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## thefam

LeananSidhe said:


> As I’ve mentioned, probably 100 times now, my sex drive fluctuations were due to birth control. I have a naturally high drive but I react poorly (or not depending on how you look at it) to hormonal birth control. I don’t know why.


I had the worst sex life period of my marriage for my time on birth control. It was soooo depressing because I never turned down my husband for sex but I just didn't have desire for it. So I was always anxious at bedtime that he would want it. I went back to my high drive self when I got off and tried to conceive. It took 5 years to get pregnant during which time I got a little depressed about sex.

When I finally got pregnant my sex drive sky rocketed so much so that I was afraid it was going to flatten after I delivered but nope. 

Another thing-TAM (or giving birth...IDK) brought out my kinky side.

Anyway background is raised in church, hammered in us 3 girls that we should be virgins when we married, that girls who sleep around were not marriage material. Played along because I was scared of my parents but in my mind I fully intended to have sex as soon as I got a boyfriend (mainly my now hubby who at that time wouldn't give me the time of day). When we finally got together I was reluctant which is a story for another day.

Anyway oddly enough when my H asked me to marry him my Mom almost every day before we got married drove home 3 things for advice, one of which was "never turn down your husband when he wants sex. That's ungodly"

All that being said I have a feeling my high drive is more tied to my deep love respect and admiration for my hubby. I pray I never have to find out otherwise.

Exercise as a child: not overly active but in high school I was on the ballroom dance team which changed all that. Hubby and I continued amateur ballroom dance until he got too competitive with it which made me no longer enjoy it.

Periods have never been a major issue.


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## 269370

Blaine said:


> Since we are talking to a group of high drive women can I ask your normal number or orgasms for a good sexual encounter or a great one? Anyone have a way of describing the intensity of their normal orgasms or for really good one? Everything from toe curling, leg shaking, screaming to passing out?


My wife has no problem climaxing from penetration but I’m not sure that’s the most important thing for her. The whole ‘journey’ is what matters. But she’s somebody I would have described as LD before but with an extremely responsive desire; but if I approach her in the right way, there is no limit....
If I’m lazy and just wait for things to happen; she will probably stop having sex with me. (And some of the time, I definitely AM lazy).

They say behind every great man is an even greater woman; I say behind every great nympho is an intuitive and imaginative partner. 
But that’s also simplistic. Sometimes there’s just no compatibility and that’s it.



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## LeananSidhe

I just wrote out a long reply but lost it somehow. 😞

Anyway, long story short... I don’t think most people would be able to know that I have a high drive. I’m a quiet, shy person usually. Especially around the opposite sex. I have always dressed conservative (Mormon). 
I’m just a totally different person in the bedroom.


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## LeananSidhe

thefam said:


> I had the worst sex life period of my marriage for my time on birth control. It was soooo depressing because I never turned down my husband for sex but I just didn't have desire for it. So I was always anxious at bedtime that he would want it. I went back to my high drive self when I got off and tried to conceive. It took 5 years to get pregnant during which time I got a little depressed about sex.


Thank you! It definitely happens.

My husband was my first real sexual partner and I had a very high sex drive. I always wanted it and we had sex all the time. I had fertility problems and it took us almost 5 years to have our first baby. After he was born I was put on birth control for the first time. It was a lower dose pill because I was breastfeeding. My drive lowered but was still ok and we just assumed it was from being a parent and being tired. Then after baby 2 I was put on a regular dose birth control pill and my drive went way down. It was so low that I rarely wanted sex but I could still enjoy it once I got started. My friends and doctor all said it was normal because I had 2 kids now. After I had baby 3 I assumed my drive would be completely gone. I didn’t go back on birth control. My drive shot up! It was so strange because suddenly I was always horny and felt sexy again. My husband didn’t know what was going on but liked it. I was also more flirty and happier. But then I got on the depo shot...and that lowered my drive down to the worst it ever was. I wasn’t even really enjoying sex when we did it. I tried but I just felt numb. Nothing felt good. I was also extremely moody and closed off. I felt stiff around my husband and hated it. 
I finally put 2 and 2 together and realized that it might be the birth control. I stopped getting the shot and we went to condoms. A few months later my drive started back up. 
Now it’s just as high as it ever was! I’m back to having fantasies and feeling sexy. I’m also super flirty and affectionate again. 
I love it!!


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## Ynot

It is good to see these posts from women who have embraced their sexuality. I really think that many women enjoy sex but are afraid to admit it because of societal pressures. Then there are many men who are intimidated by women who are sexually open. It is a shame. 
I have a friend who tells me all the time that women only have sex for three reasons. First, to get a man, second to keep a man and third to have a baby. I feel sad for him that he hasn't enjoyed being with a woman who just enjoys sex. The times I have done so, have been great. 
Most men who think like my friend are also hung up on numbers and would perish at the thought of being with a woman with too many partners. All I can say, is too bad for them. They don't understand that that thing she does that drives you crazy - well she learned that somewhere.


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## Ursula

Like @Faithful Wife, I wouldn't really consider myself a Nympho, but my drive is pretty damn high.

People in my life would probably be utterly shocked to know that, and to know that I love things like anal. I'm the quiet, dorky girl in the corner! I've always been a geek, don't consider myself to be exceptionally pretty, and I'm certainly not sexy!

Organic thoughts…:
- monthly cycle is predictable as I'm on the pill; very light flow; not much for cramps
- hobbies include anything artsy: I'm a classical musician, love photography, crafts, my dogs, dogs in general, hiking, x-country skiing, snowshoeing, skating, swimming.
- exercise: I get loads of cardio, and just joined a gym to get into weight training

As for my parents, this is an odd one. I don't recall them having sex often, although when they did, they would never close their door. I don't know why, maybe they thought I'd be clueless about what they're doing…? It was weird and uncomfortable and it would sometimes wake me up. One time, when we were living in a rental unit, their bedroom was directly across from mine, and I actually got up to close their door. Other than that, I recall experimenting with masturbation at a very early age (like single digit age, yet), and I'm not sure where that stems from, or if it's contributed to my own high drive. I was also raised to believe that sex before marriage was a horrible thing, and when my sister moved in with her BF, I was told: "I hope you have more damn brains than your sister when you get to be her age". I left home at 26, and lost my virginity at 26. Late in life, but boy have I made up for it!


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## 269370

Rocky Mountain Yeti said:


> What was inspirational was the way your whole description of self runs so counter to the commonly accepted narrative that people of our generation usually grow up with with regard to female sexuality.
> 
> The first level of narrative that did a great disservice was that women don't really enjoy sex.
> 
> The next level was that women tolerate sex to get the other things they want in life (i.e. kids, financial stability, diamonds and clothes, etc).
> 
> The next level was that of those very few who actually enjoy sex, they are incapable of fidelity. They were pejoratively labeled as ****s and consequently were not to be trusted under any circumstances.
> 
> Some of us were wise or aware enough to know better, but as overwhelming as that narrative was, it couldn't not influence most of our generation, as well as those generations who came before.
> 
> And what a dark, depressing vision of sexuality it was!
> 
> It's inspiring that that truth isn't so dark. Romantic relationships need not be the mere barter of love for sex of material goods for sex, etc. Both partners CAN have both emotional AND sexual fulfillment. How awesome to think a woman can be highly sexual AND loyal!
> 
> Hopefully, the current generation is being raised under a more enlightened approach.



I grew up in a different world, void of those stereotypes; none of the women I knew felt that way. They made their own choices and nobody judged them. 

But in the end, successful partner selection is based on so many aspects; sexual compatibility is just one of them. If you are constantly annoyed with someone (as an example), nympho or not, the future is not going to be bright. 

In these sex-focused threads, people sometimes put the cart before the horse: lack of sex or abundance of it is often a symptom of something else going on in the marriage. It’s like a very superficial barometer of the overall health of the marriage.


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## BioFury

LeananSidhe said:


> I just wrote out a long reply but lost it somehow. 😞
> 
> Anyway, long story short... I don’t think most people would be able to know that I have a high drive. I’m a quiet, shy person usually. Especially around the opposite sex. I have always dressed conservative (Mormon).
> I’m just a totally different person in the bedroom.


But from your perspective looking at your own behavior, is there anywhere that your high drive shines through? 

Were you obsessed with boys when you were young, even if you didn't express it to anyone? When did you yourself realize that you had a high drive? And, if I may ask, what are you monthly cycles like? Regular, irregular, painful, not painful, heavy, light?


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## LeananSidhe

Ynot said:


> It is good to see these posts from women who have embraced their sexuality. I really think that many women enjoy sex but are afraid to admit it because of societal pressures. Then there are many men who are intimidated by women who are sexually open. It is a shame.


This is so true. When I was younger I was more open with friends and coworkers about sex and I regretted it. Even though I was faithful to my husband (and he’s my only real sexual experience) I got this weird reputation. It was a pretty relaxed work environment (restaurant) and lots of flirting between other coworkers. I had one male manager (married) who used to just constant harass me because he “knew I liked it”. It was pretty bad. I quickly found another job and left. I learned not to join sex conversations for the most part and only talk to closer female friends.


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## 269370

Maybe I am ‘one of those men’ who were not really that comfortable with ‘highly sexual women’ (or women who felt the need to go through a lot of effort to present themselves in such a way).

This was nothing to do with ‘fear’ of their sexuality; but it was partly to do with the primal urge I always had to be the ‘pursuer’ the ‘hunter’. I need to fight for my female and make her ‘mine’. I don’t like it too easy. I don’t like women picking me or even flirting with me openly (found open/obvious flirting, groping from women etc somewhat irritating).

The other reason was that from experience, a lot of this ‘I’m a highly sexual woman, look at me’ thing was just not always what was actually going on. Maybe some women really thought that they were this way but for many men, it didn’t turn out to be that way at all and it was a bit of an act. I saw MANY men getting burnt because they thought they were getting something totally different than what actually transpired to be the case and ended up divorced/alone. 
Talking about it is one thing but looking at results (and what actually happened to those couples) is something rather different.
It all felt just too ‘high maintenance’ for me, and much too risky.

I always knew that being with someone quite stubborn who never gives into any argument or holding onto grudges for example for me would be a recipe for disaster (as I’m stubborn myself). I did try various types at the very beginning and it was very easy for me to just ‘sort/discard’ and project into the future of how things might be. For example if I argued with a girlfriend all day long about something totally superficial and we couldn’t move past it, it’s fairly straightforward to project into the future that this is likely going to be a dead end. And no matter how sexual that girl is, I could see myself just lying in bed next her masturbating and feeling miserable for not getting any sex from this highly sexual being and also from feeling miserable from constantly being walked all over because I won’t admit that I forgot to buy the milk or some other bull**** that i didn’t do and wasn’t willing to admit to. I know it’s childish but sorry to say, this is how divorces come about 99% of the time: because of childishness.

Anyway, in the end it’s about type. And there’s most certainly not one type that is better for the majority as everyone will have their own type that will be best for them. What you need to know though, is what type is NOT for you, rather than what type you’d ‘love to be with’, in theory. Because it’s all about the practice, and not theory.


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## NobodySpecial

Ynot said:


> It is good to see these posts from women who have embraced their sexuality. I really think that many women enjoy sex but are afraid to admit it because of societal pressures. Then there are many men who are intimidated by women who are sexually open. It is a shame.


Or don't even know because of experiences that are a result of societal expectations of men AND women.

I agree it is a shame. Throw out the societal expectation rule bool, I say! (Start with religion.)


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## personofinterest

I am going to assume we are not referring to the clinical definition of nymphomaniac, as that would not be the kind of marital or life partner most monogamous people would want.  Kind of like that guy who can't make up his mind is probably not bipolar lol. But I digress...

I definitely have a high drive. I'm an every day kind of woman. I am very touchy feely, enjoy sex immensely, and am adventurous. I don't know that there were any "tell-tale" signs. Though I was boy crazy like some of the other posters. Heck, I sometimes chased boys on the playground to kiss them in kindergarten - the scandal!

In junior high we began attending a very conservative church, and I redirected my energies into spiritual pursuits. I am not sorry, nor do I feel they "stunted" me. I was so desperate to be liked and fit in, it probably saved me a lot of heartache and a teenage pregnancy haha. But I still liked boys and wished for a boyfriend and wanted to be kissed. In college I was head over heels in love with a guy who saw me as "just a friend." However, one magical weekend we fooled around (no intercourse), and THAT woke me up to how powerful those "feelings" could be. I manged to keep them in control, but I was very physical with my boyfriends after that. Then I married, and....well, I've told some of that story.

I have always been very creative and expressive. I love the arts, am somewhat of an extrovert, enjoy performing. My taste in clothes hovers between the professional I know I should wear and the bohemian, girl-dancing-through-wildflowers style I wish I could wear all the time. I've always been extremely feminine, and I tend toward submissiveness. However, I have a firey temper as well. I do not lose my temper with hubby because I love him, or my kids because I love them. But I don't spare my ire with people who I don't know when I feel they are being jerky or idiots or just plain asshats. Which has gotten me into trouble online at times. 

I like my colors bright, my food to have flavor, my humor clever, and my sex passionate. But to much of the world, I probably seem like a sweet, unassuming, good girl.


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## Ynot

NobodySpecial said:


> Or don't even know because of experiences that are a result of societal expectations of men AND women.
> 
> I agree it is a shame. Throw out the societal expectation rule bool, I say! (Start with religion.)


Yes, start with religion! Not to thread jack too much, but as any one who has been trapped in a sexless marriage can attest, trying to live a life you don't want, stinks. Life can be so much more liberating and fulfilling when one can become who they want to be instead of who others think they should be. In today's world, hopefully we will see more of that as people start to realize they no longer have to play by the old rules of yesterdays world.


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## LeananSidhe

BioFury said:


> But from your perspective looking at your own behavior, is there anywhere that your high drive shines through?
> 
> Were you obsessed with boys when you were young, even if you didn't express it to anyone? When did you yourself realize that you had a high drive? And, if I may ask, what are you monthly cycles like? Regular, irregular, painful, not painful, heavy, light?


Where my drive shines through... Maybe that I’m very flirty. I love to flirt and tease. I’m affectionate too. People have commented that I’m always touching my husband. I rub his arm and scratch his back a lot in public. 

Obsessed with boys... I don’t actually think so. At least not out in the open. I was painfully shy around boys. When most of my friends got boyfriends I lagged behind. I had plenty of crushes though. I was your typical teen with pictures of cute musicians on my wall. I had a picture of Rob Thomas from Matchbox 20 over my bed. LOL
I did fantasize about sex and masturbated a lot. 

I’m not sure when I realized I was high drive. I think I might have gotten the idea when I was young. I felt like there was something wrong with me because I was always so interested in sex and masturbating. Then after I met my husband I realized that I really liked sex and everything that went with it. I actually broke up with him because I felt so guilty because of my upbringing. I dated another guy who assumed I was a virgin and I thought it was for the best. Kind of like wiping the slate clean and I could be good this time...but I ended up extremely frustrated because he was so respectful and never tried anything with me and I was constantly wanting it. I remember one night making out with him and I was ready to rip my clothes off and praying for him just to make a move. He moved his hand up and lightly touched my boob through my shirt and I was so excited but he jerked back and apologized and drove me home.... I kind of feel bad for that guy now. Lol. He had no idea. 
I broke up with him and ran back to my future husband and straight into his bed again. Literally. He was the only one who knew the real me. So that’s when I knew that I didn’t just love it but also needed it. 

Cycles... Kind of crazy. They were painful and irregular when I was younger. It took us almost 5 years to conceive our first baby. When I was put on birth control my cycles became very normal and not painful (but my sex drive was lowered). Now that I’m not on birth control my periods are back to being super irregular but they aren’t very painful anymore.


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## NobodySpecial

My exterior package would give no clues. I am totally straight forward. Pretty type-A. I am NOT emotive or touchy. But I am not dependent on messages from my upbringing, thank god! What is naturally in me is readily available to me, and I don't need to hide it. If you looked at the men I am attracted to, they don't look like the standard god men you see on screens. They are not unattractive. But they have huge brains. Huge brains and tons of introspection. HOT!


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## personofinterest

> I felt like there was something wrong with me because I was always so interested in sex and masturbating.


At the risk of being highly embarrassed....when I was around 12 I discovered masturbation, and I did it a lot. I also started reading my 16 year old neighbor's naughty novels lol.

Then I was assaulted, and things took a turn. I began writing very disturbing stories of violent sex and me cutting off men's parts and such. Looking back, I REALLY should have told someone and gotten some help. I look at my family's move to a new church and redirecting my energies as a blessing and the kind of healing I needed. I was likely on the road to becoming a very messed up girl.

When I rediscovered those feelings at 20, enough time and growth and healing had happened so that the shame and anger were gone. Just the normal desire and feelings were there.


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## Elizabeth001

NobodySpecial said:


> My exterior package would give no clues. I am totally straight forward. Pretty type-A. I am NOT emotive or touchy. But I am not dependent on messages from my upbringing, thank god! What is naturally in me is readily available to me, and I don't need to hide it. If you looked at the men I am attracted to, they don't look like the standard god men you see on screens. They are not unattractive. But they have huge brains. Huge brains and tons of introspection. HOT!




The term sapiosexual is interesting to me. I’ve done a little googling but I can relate 


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## NobodySpecial

Elizabeth001 said:


> The term sapiosexual is interesting to me. I’ve done a little googling but I can relate
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


Ugh. Around here, that term has been co-oped by the super nerd, anime watching type who are trying to make a sexy niche for themselves.


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## ConanHub

"Nymphdar" available at Amazon???


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## Elizabeth001

NobodySpecial said:


> Ugh. Around here, that term has been co-oped by the super nerd, anime watching type who are trying to make a sexy niche for themselves.




lol 


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## thefam

LeananSidhe said:


> As I’ve mentioned, probably 100 times now, my sex drive fluctuations were due to birth control. I have a naturally high drive but I react poorly (or not depending on how you look at it) to hormonal birth control. I don’t know why.





Ynot said:


> Yes, start with religion! Not to thread jack too much, but as any one who has been trapped in a sexless marriage can attest, trying to live a life you don't want, stinks. Life can be so much more liberating and fulfilling when one can become who they want to be instead of who others think they should be. In today's world, hopefully we will see more of that as people start to realize they no longer have to play by the old rules of yesterdays world.


As someone who was raised religious, in a non-denominational church, I would say our church us proactive in a healthy sex life, just with married couples. 

My mother who is a church lady for real, has taught several classes to married ladies at our church. My sisters and I try to go and support her when she teaches and we always end up shaking our heads saying "is this OUR Mom?"

Our Pastor always talks about it across the pulpit and it is definitely not approached as being taboo within marriage.


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## NobodySpecial

thefam said:


> As someone who was raised religious, in a non-denominational church, I would say our church us proactive in a healthy sex life, just with married couples.
> 
> My mother who is a church lady for real, has taught several classes to married ladies at our church. My sisters and I try to go and support her when she teaches and we always end up shaking our heads saying "is this OUR Mom?"
> 
> Our Pastor always talks about it across the pulpit and it is definitely not approached as being taboo within marriage.


In my opinion only, by the time one is committed to only having sex with one person ever for the rest of one's life is too late to be approaching this topic. ymmv.


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## personofinterest

As much as some religious groups have earned scapegoat status, there ARE people of faith with healthy sex lives, and there will always be religion. So I'm not sure it's all that productive to use a nypho thread to denigrate religion. Yeah, some churches mess people up. Some don't. And as tough as my first marriage was, it wasn't actually God's fault.


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## Ynot

thefam said:


> As someone who was raised religious, in a non-denominational church, I would say our church us proactive in a healthy sex life, just with *married* couples.
> 
> My mother who is a church lady for real, has taught several classes to *married* ladies at our church. My sisters and I try to go and support her when she teaches and we always end up shaking our heads saying "is this OUR Mom?"
> 
> Our Pastor always talks about it across the pulpit and it is definitely not approached as being taboo within *marriage*.


This exactly why I posted what I posted. As was said later by another poster, by the time one gets married it is a little too late to be finding out what one likes or dislikes. No matter how much or deeply it is discussed, one never knows until one finds out.
So while your church may promote a healthy sex for married couples, I am sure what is considered healthy within the church may be very different than what others might consider healthy. I am also sure that the wide open sex life that some enjoy outside of your church (and outside of marriage) would NOT be considered healthy by your church.


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## personofinterest

Ynot said:


> This exactly why I posted what I posted. As was said later by another poster, by the time one gets married it is a little too late to be finding out what one likes or dislikes. No matter how much or deeply it is discussed, one never knows until one finds out.
> So while your church may promote a healthy sex for married couples, I am sure what is considered healthy within the church may be very different than what others might consider healthy. I am also sure that the wide open sex life that some enjoy outside of your church (and outside of marriage) would NOT be considered healthy by your church.


At my church, they use the verse about the marriage bed being undefiled as the guide. Here is what it means....

....

....

It means ANYTHING a husband and wife consensually want to do. Anal? Fine. Se swing? Fine. D/s? Fine. Role playing? Fine.

Threesomes and orgies would be a problem, but then that would be a problem for a lot of people.

It is fine do disagree with religion or even dislike religion. Just don't let the view bleed into ignorant generalizations..Because then one looks, well, ignorant.

Of course, I do sort of dread the day my MIL asks why there is an eye-bolt above the bed......


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## thefam

NobodySpecial said:


> In my opinion only, by the time one is committed to only having sex with one person ever for the rest of one's life is too late to be approaching this topic. ymmv.


Doesn't appear to help too many of you non-religious people either. From what I read on TAM incompatbility and sexless marriages is not confined to ChrIstians.


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## LeananSidhe

personofinterest said:


> I felt like there was something wrong with me because I was always so interested in sex and masturbating.
> 
> 
> 
> At the risk of being highly embarrassed....when I was around 12 I discovered masturbation, and I did it a lot. I also started reading my 16 year old neighbor's naughty novels lol.
> 
> Then I was assaulted, and things took a turn. I began writing very disturbing stories of violent sex and me cutting off men's parts and such. Looking back, I REALLY should have told someone and gotten some help. I look at my family's move to a new church and redirecting my energies as a blessing and the kind of healing I needed. I was likely on the road to becoming a very messed up girl.
> 
> When I rediscovered those feelings at 20, enough time and growth and healing had happened so that the shame and anger were gone. Just the normal desire and feelings were there.
Click to expand...

I actually touched on something similar in my long post that disappeared. 

I was taught to masturbate at a much younger age by an older female cousin. She was young too. Neither of us knew what we were doing, she just found something that felt good so she showed me. I got in big trouble because I started doing it in front of people because I didn’t know any better. After that I started sneaking and doing it in my room but I knew it was “bad” so I always felt guilty and like there must be something wrong with me. 

I was raped by a boyfriend at 15. It happened on my parents couch while they slept in their bedroom. I was more worried about them waking up than I was about fighting it. The guy told me it was my fault because I let him go too far and he lost control. He cried and I apologized to him... Later he threatened to tell my parents if I didn’t let him have sex with me again. I just laid there the whole time. I remember being so disappointed because I had fantasized about sex for so long and it was terrible. I told the guy to leave me alone shortly after. I didn’t feel extreme anger over it by just a lot of guilt because I really believed it was my fault. I had let myself get caught up in how exciting the kissing and touching felt and then the bad part happened...everyone warned me about that but I didn’t listen and look what happened. That was my mindset anyway.


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## SadSamIAm

My Nymphdar is broken.

I dated a few girls that I felt were nymphos. They loved sex. My wife was one of them.

I always wondered if those girls (that I though were nymphos) would have eventually turned into my wife? Maybe they are nymphos and I break them?


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## personofinterest

LeananSidhe said:


> I actually touched on something similar in my long post that disappeared.
> 
> I was taught to masturbate at a much younger age by an older female cousin. She was young too. Neither of us knew what we were doing, she just found something that felt good so she showed me. I got in big trouble because I started doing it in front of people because I didn’t know any better. After that I started sneaking and doing it in my room but I knew it was “bad” so I always felt guilty and like there must be something wrong with me.
> 
> I was raped by a boyfriend at 15. It happened on my parents couch while they slept in their bedroom. I was more worried about them waking up than I was about fighting it. The guy told me it was my fault because I let him go too far and he lost control. He cried and I apologized to him... Later he threatened to tell my parents if I didn’t let him have sex with me again. I just laid there the whole time. I remember being so disappointed because I had fantasized about sex for so long and it was terrible. I told the guy to leave me alone shortly after. I didn’t feel extreme anger over it by just a lot of guilt because I really believed it was my fault. I had let myself get caught up in how exciting the kissing and touching felt and then the bad part happened...everyone warned me about that but I didn’t listen and look what happened. That was my mindset anyway.


I am so sorry that happened to you. For me, he had been telling me I was pretty and such, and no one ever told me that. I was.....awkward. Tall, gangly, glasses, unruly hair, all arms and legs....so this older teenage boy telling ME I was Pretty...wow! I didn't fight much either because I was paralyzed with shock and fear and didn't want anyone to hear. Even now, I remember him coming in, I remember the fear and sensations, but I do not actually remember a blow by blow of what happened. I only assume I was actually raped because of how sore I was.

Thankfully, I had enough time and enough healthy role models and such that I was able to process it, put some distance and time between me and the incident, and have a healthy view of men, relationships, and sex. I know it very well could have gone a different way. I think having an amazing father played a big part. 

I'd hate to think something that happened to me when I was 12 would have kept me from enjoying my amazing husband today.


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## NobodySpecial

thefam said:


> Doesn't appear to help too many of you non-religious people either. From what I read on TAM incompatbility and sexless marriages is not confined to ChrIstians.


Prohibition on premarital sex seems more common among the religious.


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## Faithful Wife

Nympho fight! Nympho fight! Woot woot! Maybe they will kiss!


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## Faithful Wife

personofinterest said:


> I'd hate to think something that happened to me when I was 12 would have kept me from enjoying my amazing husband today.


I think this happens to millions of people, men and women. Something bad happens during childhood or adolescence and it prevents them from having a healthy sex life for the rest of their lives. It is not always the case, but for those who have experienced something sexually traumatic (or even just confusing, as sometimes the event itself is just fuzzy versus traumatic right away) many don't ever find a way to cope with what happened and separate it from their adult, healthy thoughts and feelings. So sad, the child was not only robbed of the privilege of having a childhood free from unwanted sex, they also pay the price as adults. 

I'm glad that you found your way. 

Still sorry it happened.


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## thefam

NobodySpecial said:


> Prohibition on premarital sex seems more common among the religious.


And I'm saying that non-prohibition doesnt prevent sexless marriages or incompatibility.


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## 269370

NobodySpecial said:


> Prohibition on premarital sex seems more common among the religious.




I wonder why?  


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## LeananSidhe

personofinterest said:


> I am so sorry that happened to you. For me, he had been telling me I was pretty and such, and no one ever told me that. I was.....awkward. Tall, gangly, glasses, unruly hair, all arms and legs....so this older teenage boy telling ME I was Pretty...wow! I didn't fight much either because I was paralyzed with shock and fear and didn't want anyone to hear. Even now, I remember him coming in, I remember the fear and sensations, but I do not actually remember a blow by blow of what happened. I only assume I was actually raped because of how sore I was.
> 
> Thankfully, I had enough time and enough healthy role models and such that I was able to process it, put some distance and time between me and the incident, and have a healthy view of men, relationships, and sex. I know it very well could have gone a different way. I think having an amazing father played a big part.
> 
> I'd hate to think something that happened to me when I was 12 would have kept me from enjoying my amazing husband today.


I don’t remember many details either. I remember a little after it happened because I remember him crying and me being confused about it and the guilt but the act is kind of a blur.
I didn’t have any healthy sex role models. It wasn’t talked about at all in my family. Oddly enough, my 2 best friends were very promiscuous. But they also had low self esteem and awful experiences so it seemed like another cautionary tale about sex to me. 
My husband is the one who helped me feel better about sex. He kind of just let me go as far as I wanted with him and never pressured me. I tried all the things I had been curious about with him and it was fun. I don’t know why but I felt really open with him. I would say “I’ve always wondered how it feels to ___” and he’d always obliged. Unsurprisingly. Lol


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## NobodySpecial

inmyprime said:


> I wonder why?
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


I have No Earthly Idea what religions seem to get the knickers in such a twist about sex.


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## NobodySpecial

thefam said:


> And I'm saying that non-prohibition doesnt prevent sexless marriages or incompatibility.


Nor did I suggest that it did. Since that is not what I was talking about, I am not sure why you replied to me.


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## personofinterest

NobodySpecial said:


> I have No Earthly Idea what religions seem to get the knickers in such a twist about sex.


Honestly, I think there are 2 reasons:

1. The time. Even though there are records of ancient birth control, honeycombs and potions didn't always work. Because of the social structure, you can imagine that there might have been issues with all sorts of multiple people with multiple baby daddies, etc. Not to mention disease and such. Also, marriage is seen as many as a picture of Christ and the Church, so the whole idea of belonging only to God comes into play. Also, many believe that since God designed sex, it is special, not to just be tossed around with anyone. The phrase "one flesh" in the Bible is believed to mean the sex act and that it should only be shared with the spouse to whom one has made vows.

Also, in those times it was not uncommon for a woman to not start her period until the mid teens and then marry soon after. These days, girls can start their period at 10, boys go through puberty much sooner than they used to, and people are marrying later and later. I think that makes the "waiting" a lot more complicated.

I am not arguing whether or not any of these things are legitimate. I am just pointing out some of the varied rationale. I am not sorry I married as a virgin. But I am sorry I didn't feel free enough to talk about it and save myself some heartache.

All that said, it is usually easier to have open discussion about things when the core of what someone is is not denigrated. Then again, I know there are a few people (not you, Nobody Special) who have no interest in really having any kind of civility with someone who is religious because of their own disdain for it. That makes me sad, not because they are not religious, but because they are so intolerant.


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## 269370

NobodySpecial said:


> I have No Earthly Idea what religions seem to get the knickers in such a twist about sex.




It’s pretty clear I would have thought? (With regards to premarital sex).

https://corechristianity.com/resour...-that-teach-that-sex-before-marriage-is-a-sin


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## NobodySpecial

personofinterest said:


> Honestly, I think there are 2 reasons:
> 
> 1. The time. Even though there are records of ancient birth control, honeycombs and potions didn't always work. Because of the social structure, you can imagine that there might have been issues with all sorts of multiple people with multiple baby daddies, etc. Not to mention disease and such. Also, marriage is seen as many as a picture of Christ and the Church, so the whole idea of belonging only to God comes into play. Also, many believe that since God designed sex, it is special, not to just be tossed around with anyone. The phrase "one flesh" in the Bible is believed to mean the sex act and that it should only be shared with the spouse to whom one has made vows.
> 
> Also, in those times it was not uncommon for a woman to not start her period until the mid teens and then marry soon after. These days, girls can start their period at 10, boys go through puberty much sooner than they used to, and people are marrying later and later. I think that makes the "waiting" a lot more complicated.
> 
> I am not arguing whether or not any of these things are legitimate. I am just pointing out some of the varied rationale. I am not sorry I married as a virgin. But I am sorry I didn't feel free enough to talk about it and save myself some heartache.
> 
> All that said, it is usually easier to have open discussion about things when the core of what someone is is not denigrated. Then again, I know there are a few people (not you, Nobody Special) who have no interest in really having any kind of civility with someone who is religious because of their own disdain for it. That makes me sad, not because they are not religious, but because they are so intolerant.


Meh. The potential for thread jack here is huge. The word "tolerant" is one of the places where I find some pretty serious hypocrisy in public discourse. For instance, I would be accused by some of being intolerant by pointing out some of the inconsistencies in just your brief explanations of which I was aware. Maybe I should have said I have no earthly idea why religions get their knickers in a twist THESE DAYS. I mean, god designed asparagus too, and he does not seem to mind my sharing dinner with anyone and everyone. 

Anyway. Trying to speak to the topic without jacking too far.


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## 269370

True. Lets get back to what the bible says about nymphos 


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## NobodySpecial

inmyprime said:


> It’s pretty clear I would have thought? (With regards to premarital sex).
> 
> https://corechristianity.com/resour...-that-teach-that-sex-before-marriage-is-a-sin
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


I stopped at Paul. No Thank You. Anyway. The fact remains that different christian sects cherry pick what they focus on. Why sex is such a huge deal, I cannot fathom.


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## Faithful Wife

For the heck of it, I just now uploaded a few pictures of me into an album in my user profile. All of these pics were taken in the past 3 months or less. One is with with my 2 adult kids, who I have cropped out. If you saw me in public, would you know I'm a nympho? Some would, because they are highly attuned. Most probably wouldn't. Others would make other assumptions about me based on other things. I just know that some of us highly sexual people can "see" each other, regardless of what the outsides are presenting or in what context. Doesn't mean we will act on it or even speak, just that we "see" each other.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson

😎 see book Song of Solomon. A great book in the joys of sex. For those not too familiar it can be kind of graphic.


----------



## personofinterest

NobodySpecial said:


> Meh. The potential for thread jack here is huge. The word "tolerant" is one of the places where I find some pretty serious hypocrisy in public discourse. For instance, I would be accused by some of being intolerant by pointing out some of the inconsistencies in just your brief explanations of which I was aware. Maybe I should have said I have no earthly idea why religions get their knickers in a twist THESE DAYS. I mean, god designed asparagus too, and he does not seem to mind my sharing dinner with anyone and everyone.
> 
> Anyway. Trying to speak to the topic without jacking too far.


If you wanted to discuss the relevance or irrelevance of what I wrote in a respectful and mutually regarding way, I would actually welcome that. I find myself sometimes wondering if some lines are really as clear in 2018 as they were in BC2000. And you are right that a whole lot of religious people are hugely intolerant. But just as I know not to paint all atheists with the most unflattering brush possible, it is always may hope that others will do the same with me.

Religious legalism has done a lot to hurt people's views of sex. Religious legalism has hurt marriages. I would say religious legalism is to blame for a couple of wives I know of being killed by their husbands.

However, I do not think it is a foregone conclusion that Christian=sexual misfit. And let's face it, we aren't talking Hindu and Judaism here. We are specifically referring to the Christian religion.

Personally, I think God is a fan of sex. He didn't have to create things like the clitoris in order for people to reproduce. He didn't have to put so many nerve endings in all those places. That was for pure pleasure.


----------



## thefam

NobodySpecial said:


> Nor did I suggest that it did. Since that is not what I was talking about, I am not sure why you replied to me.


Maybe you didn't intend to reply to me. But you quoted me in your reply.

Anyway you are mistaken about religious people in general and sex. Christianity as I'm sure you are aware teaches abstinence before marriage. But that's where the prohibition on sex ends, except of course the sex remains between husband and wife only. But that's a pretty mainstream view that extends to non-Christians too.

YMMV


----------



## NobodySpecial

Faithful Wife said:


> For the heck of it, I just now uploaded a few pictures of me into an album in my user profile. All of these pics were taken in the past 3 months or less. One is with with my 2 adult kids, who I have cropped out. If you saw me in public, would you know I'm a nympho? Some would, because they are highly attuned. Most probably wouldn't. Others would make other assumptions about me based on other things. I just know that some of us highly sexual people can "see" each other, regardless of what the outsides are presenting or in what context. Doesn't mean we will act on it or even speak, just that we "see" each other.


DH and I would guess, for sure. He would look at you and say (under his breath) "dirty girl". Sorry, not my type though.


----------



## NobodySpecial

thefam said:


> Maybe you didn't intend to reply to me. But you quoted me in your reply.
> 
> Anyway you are mistaken about religious people in general and sex. Christianity as I'm sure you are aware teaches abstinence before marriage. But that's where the prohibition on sex ends, except of course the sex remains between husband and wife only. But that's a pretty mainstream view that extends to non-Christians too.
> 
> YMMV


I would have to go back and look. So sorry if I replied to you where it was not appropriate. But my specific point was that prohibition on premarital sex is a bad idea and that the time for learning about sexuality is BEFORE you commit to one person with whom you are doing it for the rest of your life. I disagree with you that sex only between husband and wife is a mainstream view anymore. In my opinion, that change is for the better.


----------



## NobodySpecial

personofinterest said:


> If you wanted to discuss the relevance or irrelevance of what I wrote in a respectful and mutually regarding way, I would actually welcome that. I find myself sometimes wondering if some lines are really as clear in 2018 as they were in BC2000. And you are right that a whole lot of religious people are hugely intolerant. But just as I know not to paint all atheists with the most unflattering brush possible, it is always may hope that others will do the same with me.
> 
> Religious legalism has done a lot to hurt people's views of sex. Religious legalism has hurt marriages. I would say religious legalism is to blame for a couple of wives I know of being killed by their husbands.
> 
> 
> However, I do not think it is a foregone conclusion that Christian=sexual misfit. And let's face it, we aren't talking Hindu and Judaism here. We are specifically referring to the Christian religion.


I guess I was thinking also of Islam. I know little of most other religions. But from what I think I know, Judaism has some of the same injunctions around sex outside of marriage.



> Personally, I think God is a fan of sex. He didn't have to create things like the clitoris in order for people to reproduce. He didn't have to put so many nerve endings in all those places. That was for pure pleasure.


I don't think it would be super helpful to this thread to talk about Christianity and sex and spotting nymphos. tee hee. I would merely say that your view is not very typically biblical. And I know of sects that speak to that creation serving a much less positive purpose.


----------



## thefam

NobodySpecial said:


> I would have to go back and look. So sorry if I replied to you where it was not appropriate. But my specific point was that prohibition on premarital sex is a bad idea and that the time for learning about sexuality is BEFORE you commit to one person with whom you are doing it for the rest of your life. I disagree with you that sex only between husband and wife is a mainstream view anymore. In my opinion, that change is for the better.


I'm sorry what I meant to convey is the mainstream view is when there is a married couple they don't bring a 3rd party into the marriage. But I could be wrong about that. Maybe now most married couples are swingers. It's just not for me. 

As for abstinence before marriage of course as a non-religious person you are going to feel that way. But I don't see how it makes much of a difference in the hard numbers of couples who have sexual problems in their marriages. Those who engaged before marriage have just as many issues as those who didn't. 

Full disclosure I did before even though my husband is the only one I've ever been with sexually or otherwise. But like I said that's a whole other story.


----------



## Faithful Wife

NobodySpecial said:


> I don't think it would be super helpful to this thread to talk about Christianity and sex and spotting nymphos.


First of all, God spots all Nymphos, he has the ultimate Sexdar.

Also, he created the Nympho himself, so he is highly fond of us.

In fact, in my religion, our myth is that God originally did not want to send the Nymphos to earth as he knew man would not understand or care for us properly. So we waited until God was passed out from a Nympho session and we all descended upon the earth to see what man has to offer.

We been begging to come home ever since but God is either still passed out and/or isn't returning our call. :laugh:


----------



## BioFury

Faithful Wife said:


> For the heck of it, I just now uploaded a few pictures of me into an album in my user profile. All of these pics were taken in the past 3 months or less. One is with with my 2 adult kids, who I have cropped out. If you saw me in public, would you know I'm a nympho? Some would, because they are highly attuned. Most probably wouldn't. Others would make other assumptions about me based on other things. I just know that some of us highly sexual people can "see" each other, regardless of what the outsides are presenting or in what context. Doesn't mean we will act on it or even speak, just that we "see" each other.


Would you be willing to do sexdar lessons? >


----------



## Faithful Wife

BioFury said:


> Faithful Wife said:
> 
> 
> 
> For the heck of it, I just now uploaded a few pictures of me into an album in my user profile. All of these pics were taken in the past 3 months or less. One is with with my 2 adult kids, who I have cropped out. If you saw me in public, would you know I'm a nympho? Some would, because they are highly attuned. Most probably wouldn't. Others would make other assumptions about me based on other things. I just know that some of us highly sexual people can "see" each other, regardless of what the outsides are presenting or in what context. Doesn't mean we will act on it or even speak, just that we "see" each other.
> 
> 
> 
> Would you be willing to do sexdar lessons? <a href="http://talkaboutmarriage.com/images/TAMarriage_2015/smilies/tango_face_devil.png" border="0" alt="" title="Devil" ></a>
Click to expand...

Absolutely! This is something that would have to be done in person though. Go together in public somewhere (anywhere will do, park, grocery store, mall) and just people watch for awhile. I could point out those who “ping” and try to describe what I’m picking up from them. It would take several examples but eventually you would see the indicators I’m seeing.

Of course we couldn’t then chase them down and ask “hey you pinged my sexdar, would you be willing to answer some personal questions about your sexual proclivity?” So you’d have to take my word for it, I suppose.

Wish I could set up a panel of people in a line up to do this experiment with and have the participants describe their sexuality before hand so I could see my success rate. 

The reason I trust my sexdar is that with many many people I’ve felt a ping with on first sight, I’ve later gotten to know them (men and women) and found out I was right. I’m also usually right about those who I’ve felt no ping with, got to know them later and heard their stories and they are not very sexual.


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## thefam

@Faithful Wife sorry. Your pics say "Vixen" all the way! LOL

You look good!


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## Faithful Wife

thefam said:


> @Faithful Wife sorry. Your pics say "Vixen" all the way! LOL
> 
> You look good!


You and NS can "see" me because it takes one to know one. 0


----------



## personofinterest

thefam said:


> @Faithful Wife sorry. Your pics say "Vixen" all the way! LOL
> 
> You look good!


Yeah, I gotta agree. You have that angle to your smirk and that look in your eye lol


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## Blaine

Nice pix Faithfull ur H is a lucky man


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti

NobodySpecial said:


> I would have to go back and look. So sorry if I replied to you where it was not appropriate. But my specific point was that prohibition on premarital sex is a bad idea and that the time for learning about sexuality is BEFORE you commit to one person with whom you are doing it for the rest of your life. I disagree with you that sex only between husband and wife is a mainstream view anymore. In my opinion, that change is for the better.



Yes!

Even today, there's a lot of flotsam and jetsam in the wake of that outmoded view.


----------



## Blaine

Faithful Wife said:


> First of all, God spots all Nymphos, he has the ultimate Sexdar.
> 
> Also, he created the Nympho himself, so he is highly fond of us.
> 
> In fact, in my religion, our myth is that God originally did not want to send the Nymphos to earth as he knew man would not understand or care for us properly. So we waited until God was passed out from a Nympho session and we all descended upon the earth to see what man has to offer.
> 
> We been begging to come home ever since but God is either still passed out and/or isn't returning our call. :laugh:


Interesting post-Faithfull I have long believed God built us with our desires so they can't be wrong. The only religious question is how do we use them? ie: inside a faithful relationship where each can explore their body's limits with someone u can trust. If you have a string of one nite stands it is easier to be hurt emotionally, physically and mentally. I learned long ago the female body is capable of way more than most people think it can. (even women) I have said to female friends that they could easily have 20 or more orgasms during each sexual encounter and then they look at me like I have 3 heads. So I have to explain the purpose of a female orgasm is different than a male orgasm. Then I have to wait 20 mins while they process it. Of course, showing them how is much more fun.


----------



## BioFury

LeananSidhe said:


> Where my drive shines through... Maybe that I’m very flirty. I love to flirt and tease. I’m affectionate too. People have commented that I’m always touching my husband. I rub his arm and scratch his back a lot in public.
> 
> Obsessed with boys... I don’t actually think so. At least not out in the open. I was painfully shy around boys. When most of my friends got boyfriends I lagged behind. I had plenty of crushes though. I was your typical teen with pictures of cute musicians on my wall. I had a picture of Rob Thomas from Matchbox 20 over my bed. LOL
> I did fantasize about sex and masturbated a lot.
> 
> I’m not sure when I realized I was high drive. I think I might have gotten the idea when I was young. I felt like there was something wrong with me because I was always so interested in sex and masturbating. Then after I met my husband I realized that I really liked sex and everything that went with it. I actually broke up with him because I felt so guilty because of my upbringing. I dated another guy who assumed I was a virgin and I thought it was for the best. Kind of like wiping the slate clean and I could be good this time...but I ended up extremely frustrated because he was so respectful and never tried anything with me and I was constantly wanting it. I remember one night making out with him and I was ready to rip my clothes off and praying for him just to make a move. He moved his hand up and lightly touched my boob through my shirt and I was so excited but he jerked back and apologized and drove me home.... I kind of feel bad for that guy now. Lol. He had no idea.
> I broke up with him and ran back to my future husband and straight into his bed again. Literally. He was the only one who knew the real me. So that’s when I knew that I didn’t just love it but also needed it.
> 
> Cycles... Kind of crazy. They were painful and irregular when I was younger. It took us almost 5 years to conceive our first baby. When I was put on birth control my cycles became very normal and not painful (but my sex drive was lowered). Now that I’m not on birth control my periods are back to being super irregular but they aren’t very painful anymore.


Ok, masturbation is definitely a related metric, but I hadn't thought of it. You'd have to know the person you were dating pretty well to ask them about their masturbation habits though, lol. But I guess it would make sense that the high drive women would also masturbate a lot as soon as they discovered it.



NobodySpecial said:


> My exterior package would give no clues. I am totally straight forward. Pretty type-A. I am NOT emotive or touchy. But I am not dependent on messages from my upbringing, thank god! What is naturally in me is readily available to me, and I don't need to hide it. If you looked at the men I am attracted to, they don't look like the standard god men you see on screens. They are not unattractive. But they have huge brains. Huge brains and tons of introspection. HOT!


You're not emotive or touchy at all? Or just in public? Would you be willing to share your masturbation habits as a kid and young adult?



personofinterest said:


> At the risk of being highly embarrassed....when I was around 12 I discovered masturbation, and I did it a lot. I also started reading my 16 year old neighbor's naughty novels lol.
> 
> Then I was assaulted, and things took a turn. I began writing very disturbing stories of violent sex and me cutting off men's parts and such. Looking back, I REALLY should have told someone and gotten some help. I look at my family's move to a new church and redirecting my energies as a blessing and the kind of healing I needed. I was likely on the road to becoming a very messed up girl.
> 
> When I rediscovered those feelings at 20, enough time and growth and healing had happened so that the shame and anger were gone. Just the normal desire and feelings were there.


Ok, so childhood masturbation might be a thing. It's not as common among women (that I know of), so perhaps that's the only indicator there really is. What about your monthly cycles, if I may ask? Have they always been regular, irregular?



JustTheWife said:


> I'm kind of kinky in my fantasies and stuff that i've done in the past. I've also been promiscuous. Very submissive. Think about sex a lot. Not sure if that's what you mean by nynpho.
> 
> I'm very shy and introverted but I can be bubbly and when I'm nervous I laugh/giggle a lot. I'm usually kind of nervous in social situations. Not really so sure of myself. I dress conservatively and I'm very religious. I don't have any tattoos or any piercings of any kind. I went to college.
> 
> I'm not a "wild" type and I don't take many risks in life except with sex. I look and act really innocent. People say I'm "cute". Just like a normal girl, i guess.
> 
> I keep in good shape but i'm not obsessive about it. I jog regularly and go to the gym. I eat pretty well too.


Did you masturbate a lot as a child/young adult?


----------



## BioFury

Faithful Wife said:


> Absolutely! This is something that would have to be done in person though. Go together in public somewhere (anywhere will do, park, grocery store, mall) and just people watch for awhile. I could point out those who “ping” and try to describe what I’m picking up from them. It would take several examples but eventually you would see the indicators I’m seeing.
> 
> Of course we couldn’t then chase them down and ask “hey you pinged my sexdar, would you be willing to answer some personal questions about your sexual proclivity?” So you’d have to take my word for it, I suppose.
> 
> Wish I could set up a panel of people in a line up to do this experiment with and have the participants describe their sexuality before hand so I could see my success rate.
> 
> The reason I trust my sexdar is that with many many people I’ve felt a ping with on first sight, I’ve later gotten to know them (men and women) and found out I was right. I’m also usually right about those who I’ve felt no ping with, got to know them later and heard their stories and they are not very sexual.


Haha, yeah I suppose there not being any feedback from the individual would be the trouble. Though, people are willing to answer all kinds of questions on the street these days. At least I see it on youtube all the time, so maybe there's hope :grin2: What state are you in?

Did you masturbate a lot when you were a kid?


----------



## Faithful Wife

BioFury said:


> Haha, yeah I suppose there not being any feedback from the individual would be the trouble. Though, people are willing to answer all kinds of questions on the street these days. At least I see it on youtube all the time, so maybe there's hope :grin2: What state are you in?
> 
> Did you masturbate a lot when you were a kid?


Oregon, and yes. Constantly. I also snooped through the entire house of every person I could get away with it, looking for porn or sex toys or anything else that seemed like secret sexual stuff. Every adult I babysat for, I knew where their porn was stashed. 

However, I got really bored of MB'ing by the time I was 15 or so and just focused on boys after that. 

Touching myself still bores me, does nothing for me, and getting an O that way is in no way a release for me.

I need my brains pounded out. There is nothing even close to that feeling that I can do to myself.


----------



## 269370

BioFury said:


> Ok, masturbation is definitely a related metric, but I hadn't thought of it. You'd have to know the person you were dating pretty well to ask them about their masturbation habits though, lol. But I guess it would make sense that the high drive women would also masturbate a lot as soon as they discovered it.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You're not emotive or touchy at all? Or just in public? Would you be willing to share your masturbation habits as a kid and young adult?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Ok, so childhood masturbation might be a thing. It's not as common among women (that I know of), so perhaps that's the only indicator there really is. What about your monthly cycles, if I may ask? Have they always been regular, irregular?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Did you masturbate a lot as a child/young adult?




Can I ask why you want to learn to ‘spot’ nymphos? Is it for fun or to find a partner? 

For me, this would be some of the last metrics on the list. A nympho can be a nympho: until she meets you, for example (the general you). I don’t see how this is of much use?

I have to say I do appreciate subtleties in a woman...


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## Ynot

personofinterest said:


> At my church, they use the verse about the marriage bed being undefiled as the guide. Here is what it means....
> 
> ....
> 
> ....
> 
> It means ANYTHING a husband and wife consensually want to do. Anal? Fine. Se swing? Fine. D/s? Fine. Role playing? Fine.
> 
> Threesomes and orgies would be a problem, but then that would be a problem for a lot of people.
> 
> It is fine do disagree with religion or even dislike religion. Just don't let the view bleed into ignorant generalizations..Because then one looks, well, ignorant.
> 
> Of course, I do sort of dread the day my MIL asks why there is an eye-bolt above the bed......


No one ever said it means anything between a husband and a wife isn't fine. What was said was that once you are married (and most churches and religions frown on premarital sex) was that it may be too late. Just because you happen to enjoy what ever and so does your husband, does not mean that everyone does. Many times the sexual incompatibility only makes it self known after it is too late. So if you don't want this thread to become about religion then you need to stop posting non sequiturs.


----------



## chillymorn69

They work in libraries. Wear glasses and their hair pulled up . They dress in a conseritive fashion. 

High heels,nails painted and a wicked grin.

Oh and a make america great again button.

Red hair



Not too thin


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## Ynot

thefam said:


> Doesn't appear to help too many of you non-religious people either. From what I read on TAM incompatbility and sexless marriages is not confined to ChrIstians.


I can see that logic is not something you have bothered to study. No one has said or suggested that non-religious people do not suffer from incompatibility or sexless marriages. What was said is that religious dogma, such as sex is only between a man and a woman within the confines of marriage have created huge roadblocks in the way of one exploring and discovering their sexuality. That dogma bleeds over into all sorts of secular aspects of life as well such as secular marriages and divorce, relationships and forms the basis of the shaming that takes place throughout most of our society.


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## Idyit

I will be working in Portland soon...:grin2:


----------



## BioFury

inmyprime said:


> Can I ask why you want to learn to ‘spot’ nymphos? Is it for fun or to find a partner?
> 
> For me, this would be some of the last metrics on the list. A nympho can be a nympho: until she meets you, for example (the general you). I don’t see how this is of much use?
> 
> I have to say I do appreciate subtleties in a woman...
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


The latter. Sex drive mismatch appears to be a rampant problem. And it's not a problem I would be able to put up with. Hence the thread. 

As I'm sure you can appreciate, being with someone who can't get enough of you is very emotionally fulfilling. So even if one found a woman who was willing to have sex whenever you wanted, it wouldn't be the same as being with a woman who's not just always willing, but always eager.


----------



## BioFury

Faithful Wife said:


> Oregon, and yes. Constantly. I also snooped through the entire house of every person I could get away with it, looking for porn or sex toys or anything else that seemed like secret sexual stuff. Every adult I babysat for, I knew where their porn was stashed.
> 
> However, I got really bored of MB'ing by the time I was 15 or so and just focused on boys after that.
> 
> Touching myself still bores me, does nothing for me, and getting an O that way is in no way a release for me.
> 
> I need my brains pounded out. There is nothing even close to that feeling that I can do to myself.


Alrighty, I'm on the east coast, so I'll unfortunately have to take a rain check.

Masturbating a lot as a child seems to be the only constant so far. Strange. I would have thought a woman's cycle would be connected somehow.


----------



## Faithful Wife

BioFury said:


> Alrighty, I'm on the east coast, so I'll unfortunately have to take a rain check.
> 
> Masturbating a lot as a child seems to be the only constant so far. Strange. I would have thought a woman's cycle would be connected somehow.


I did have one really REALLY nympho friend who had horrid periods, endometriosis, and then had a full menopause early at age 34!! A few years after menopause, her sex drive shut down and disappeared completely. She says she doesn't miss sex, doesn't want it, and doesn't think about it. She says it feels weird because she used to be so sexual, but since she isn't anymore, she simply doesn't think about it. So with her crazy bad periods and then extremely early menopause and disappearing of sex altogether, I'm thinking in her case, it was all related somehow to her hormones. (She is and was single by the way. So she didn't leave some poor husband sexless).

If you are looking for a partner, then your first date or two with a particular woman is your best chance to see if you can pick up on her vibe that way. You don't have to get all dirty talking or other weird things like that. A highly sexual person will generally be comfortable talking about sex in general, or in my case, I'm comfortable talking about specifics, even on a first date.

A good way to segue into a sexual tone of conversation would be to talk about sexlessness you've experienced in the past (I'm sorry, I don't recall your story, and am not sure if this is even an issue for you). Like "why are you out on the market?" "Well, I was in what a thought was a great relationship, but it ended up sexless, so we ended it". Then feel around for her response. If she's not going to go there, not even in the least, you kind of have your answer. I mean, it may not mean she's just not a very sexual person if she doesn't want to discuss anything like that at that juncture, but what I'm getting at is that if she is a highly sexual person, she will more than likely be very open to the topic and start offering stuff of her own.


----------



## BioFury

Faithful Wife said:


> I did have one really REALLY nympho friend who had horrid periods, endometriosis, and then had a full menopause early at age 34!! A few years after menopause, her sex drive shut down and disappeared completely. She says she doesn't miss sex, doesn't want it, and doesn't think about it. She says it feels weird because she used to be so sexual, but since she isn't anymore, she simply doesn't think about it. So with her crazy bad periods and then extremely early menopause and disappearing of sex altogether, I'm thinking in her case, it was all related somehow to her hormones. (She is and was single by the way. So she didn't leave some poor husband sexless).
> 
> If you are looking for a partner, then your first date or two with a particular woman is your best chance to see if you can pick up on her vibe that way. You don't have to get all dirty talking or other weird things like that. A highly sexual person will generally be comfortable talking about sex in general, or in my case, I'm comfortable talking about specifics, even on a first date.
> 
> A good way to segue into a sexual tone of conversation would be to talk about sexlessness you've experienced in the past (I'm sorry, I don't recall your story, and am not sure if this is even an issue for you). Like "why are you out on the market?" "Well, I was in what a thought was a great relationship, but it ended up sexless, so we ended it". Then feel around for her response. If she's not going to go there, not even in the least, you kind of have your answer. I mean, it may not mean she's just not a very sexual person if she doesn't want to discuss anything like that at that juncture, but what I'm getting at is that if she is a highly sexual person, she will more than likely be very open to the topic and start offering stuff of her own.


I don't have a sob story, and I hope to keep it that way, lol :grin2: I'm young, and haven't been married as of yet. I'm hoping to do it right the first time, and marrying a woman with a high drive would definitely help :grin2: I guess I'll just have to ask about their masturbatory habits. I am religious, so it adds an additional element to any conversation on a date. In that the woman in question may _want _to talk about it, but feels that it's wrong, or inappropriate.


----------



## Faithful Wife

BioFury said:


> I don't have a sob story, and I hope to keep it that way, lol :grin2: I'm young, and haven't been married as of yet. I'm hoping to do it right the first time, and marrying a woman with a high drive would definitely help :grin2: I guess I'll just have to ask about their masturbatory habits. I am religious, so it adds an additional element to any conversation on a date. In that the woman in question may _want _to talk about it, but feels that it's wrong, or inappropriate.


Religious. Do you also want someone who is a virgin or very few sexual partners? Because that actually adds a new dilemma. Some (not all) people who have limited sexual experience don't actually know that they have a very low libido. That one is almost impossible to navigate. Neither of you will have a clue. No one can accurately determine what their base line sexuality in a relationship will be until they have had at least one sexual relationship lasting for a year or more. And many people don't know that they will end up losing a lot of sexual mojo after the first 3 years with any partner, as that is extremely common.

Also, even for me who is willing to talk about almost anything sexual on a date, I would not want someone to ask about my MB habits. I would feel like they were wanting to hear me talk about it because they were getting turned on by it. While I love talking about sex, I do not want someone on a first date talking about it with me for the express purpose of turning themselves on. I mean, it is different in a relationship. But if a guy asks me a question that seems locked and loaded for his own gratification (versus getting to know me) I will feel weird about it. It is fine if they do get turned on, and sometimes I do too. But I can tell the difference, and a question about MB would be an indicator of something other than interest in knowing me.


----------



## BioFury

Faithful Wife said:


> Religious. Do you also want someone who is a virgin or very few sexual partners? Because that actually adds a new dilemma. Some (not all) people who have limited sexual experience don't actually know that they have a very low libido. That one is almost impossible to navigate. Neither of you will have a clue. No one can accurately determine what their base line sexuality in a relationship will be until they have had at least one sexual relationship lasting for a year or more. And many people don't know that they will end up losing a lot of sexual mojo after the first 3 years with any partner, as that is extremely common.
> 
> Also, even for me who is willing to talk about almost anything sexual on a date, I would not want someone to ask about my MB habits. I would feel like they were wanting to hear me talk about it because they were getting turned on by it. While I love talking about sex, I do not want someone on a first date talking about it with me for the express purpose of turning themselves on. I mean, it is different in a relationship. But if a guy asks me a question that seems locked and loaded for his own gratification (versus getting to know me) I will feel weird about it. It is fine if they do get turned on, and sometimes I do too. But I can tell the difference, and a question about MB would be an indicator of something other than interest in knowing me.


Yes, which is one reason why I was looking for alternate indicators of the biology that you and the other high drive ladies possess. 

I wouldn't ask such a question anywhere near the first date, so I should be safe :grin2: I'm one of those people who's shocked that it's considered normal for people to be having sex by the 4th date if things are going well. I would say that I would frame the question within "I'm asking so I have a barometer for your sex drive, and thus our sexual compatibility", but that might cause them to alter their answer in a more favorable way. So to that degree, I guess it would be better to ask as soon as possible, so they're not attached, and have no desire to impress or please me with their answer.


----------



## Faithful Wife

BioFury said:


> Yes, which is one reason why I was looking for alternate indicators of the biology that you and the other high drive ladies possess.
> 
> I wouldn't ask such a question anywhere near the first date, so I should be safe :grin2: I'm one of those people who's shocked that it's considered normal for people to be having sex by the 4th date if things are going well. I would say that I would frame the question within "I'm asking so I have a barometer for your sex drive, and thus our sexual compatibility", but that might cause them to alter their answer in a more favorable way. So to that degree, I guess it would be better to ask as soon as possible, so they're not attached, and have no desire to impress or please me with their answer.


Aye.

I don't see this going quite the way you are hoping.

But do keep us posted!


----------



## BioFury

Faithful Wife said:


> Aye.
> 
> *I don't see this going quite the way you are hoping.*
> 
> But do keep us posted!


In what way?


----------



## LeananSidhe

I don’t think you’ll be able to find what you’re looking for. I don’t think there’s going to be an easy way to tell if a woman has a high sex drive especially if you also want her to be a virgin or close to it...and I might call 911 if a date asked me if I masturbated a lot as a child. 

Even if you did get a woman to answer these questions...there’s always a chance that she won’t tell the truth. She might lie to seem more sexual or lie to seem less sexual. When I was a teenager I remember a guy asking me over the phone how many times I fingered myself and I swore that I never did...as I was sticking my hand down my pants.


----------



## 269370

BioFury said:


> The latter. Sex drive mismatch appears to be a rampant problem. And it's not a problem I would be able to put up with. Hence the thread.
> 
> 
> 
> As I'm sure you can appreciate, being with someone who can't get enough of you is very emotionally fulfilling. So even if one found a woman who was willing to have sex whenever you wanted, it wouldn't be the same as being with a woman who's not just always willing, but always eager.




Yeah...no, I can see why you’d think that. But you are likely going to substitute a broken dishwasher with a washing machine...instead of a dishwasher that works for your dishes...(sorry for bad analogy).

I mean a woman with a highly active sex drive and (probably) a bunch of kinks (that usually come with an active sex drive) may solve the no sex problem for you but you will need to be able to ‘maintain’ it and feed that drive, if you plan to keep her.... And sorry to say, the ‘crops’ might become empty sooner than you may imagine and you will have a host of different problems on your hands. 

Imagine being with someone where you are not able, either physically or psychologically, to keep up and fulfil all her kinks properly? I know that maybe sound ridiculous to someone wha has no sex but it can happen and you will be suffering, both from feelings of inadequacy and inevitably, from her finding someone who CAN fulfil them. 

Don’t you want a woman who wants you because of YOU and not because she has to want you, because she’s a nympho? (Which she still may not).

I think you should try and focus on finding someone you get along with and are compatible with (sexually but also in other walks of life). Trying to ‘catch’ a nymphomaniac to keep at home as a problem solver seems an odd approach. But I have seen stranger things  Hope it works though!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## Ragnar Ragnasson

inmyprime said:


> I think you should try and focus on finding someone you get along with and are compatible with (sexually but also in other walks of life). *Most definitely*
> 
> 
> Trying to ‘catch’ a nymphomaniac to keep at home as a problem solver seems an odd approach. But I have seen stranger things  *
> I like it! A good objective. Everyone should have one to mature and grow with!*
> 
> See bolded comments. Just my humble opinion &#55357;&#56856;


----------



## BioFury

LeananSidhe said:


> I don’t think you’ll be able to find what you’re looking for. I don’t think there’s going to be an easy way to tell if a woman has a high sex drive especially if you also want her to be a virgin or close to it...and I might call 911 if a date asked me if I masturbated a lot as a child.
> 
> Even if you did get a woman to answer these questions...there’s always a chance that she won’t tell the truth. She might lie to seem more sexual or lie to seem less sexual. When I was a teenager I remember a guy asking me over the phone how many times I fingered myself and I swore that I never did...as I was sticking my hand down my pants.


I wouldn't ask such a question until I knew the person well enough, and we were comfortable with each other. Cause it has tremendous potential for being taken the wrong way.

Yes, dishonesty, and the person's own ignorance, make getting a reliable answer frustratingly difficult. Which is why I was hoping there was some, seemingly unrelated, biological or behavioral trait, that linked high drive ladies together. But masturbating as a kid is really the only thing that appears to be shared among you all.



inmyprime said:


> Yeah...no, I can see why you’d think that. But you are likely going to substitute a broken dishwasher with a washing machine...instead of a dishwasher that works for your dishes...(sorry for bad analogy).
> 
> I mean a woman with a highly active sex drive and (probably) a bunch of kinks (that usually come with an active sex drive) may solve the no sex problem for you but you will need to be able to ‘maintain’ it and feed that drive, if you plan to keep her.... And sorry to say, the ‘crops’ might become empty sooner than you may imagine and you will have a host of different problems on your hands.
> 
> Imagine being with someone where you are not able, either physically or psychologically, to keep up and fulfil all her kinks properly? I know that maybe sound ridiculous to someone wha has no sex but it can happen and you will be suffering, both from feelings of inadequacy and inevitably, from her finding someone who CAN fulfil them.
> 
> Don’t you want a woman who wants you because of YOU and not because she has to want you, because she’s a nympho? (Which she still may not).
> 
> I think you should try and focus on finding someone you get along with and are compatible with (sexually but also in other walks of life). Trying to ‘catch’ a nymphomaniac to keep at home as a problem solver seems an odd approach. But I have seen stranger things  Hope it works though!
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


Well, yeah. My goal isn't to find the first high drive and settle down. Sexual compatibility can't be the exclusive basis for a marriage. I know how to find and spot the other qualities I am looking for, while this one is still a bit of a mystery. I never intended to give the impression that "nymphomania" was the only criteria that said female needed to meet. Merely that it is the one that I have no idea how to reliably identify.

Yes, I want a woman that wants me for me. But on the same token, I have a strong need for sexual fulfillment. So the woman I marry needs to be able to fill that need. Hence the desire for recognizing individuals with a high drive.


----------



## Faithful Wife

BioFury said:


> Faithful Wife said:
> 
> 
> 
> Aye.
> 
> *I don't see this going quite the way you are hoping.*
> 
> But do keep us posted!
> 
> 
> 
> In what way?
Click to expand...

Because there is really no guaranteed way for any person to be self aware about their own sexuality if they are a virgin or very inexperienced. This includes you, by the way. You don’t actually know - if you are inexperienced yourself - if you would enjoy the sexual temperature in a relationship with a highly sexual woman. 

Even if a person is thinking they are highly sexual before sexual activity and it turns out they are correct, they still do not know much yet about their preferences. So two virgins who talk openly about how much they can’t wait to get married and start their amazing sex life together, may get there and then feel absolutely no chemistry with each other. The sex would feel clumsy and not passionate. That’s just what it feels like with a partner you have no chemistry with for everyone. So if you are placing all your chips on a really good bet like a virgin who really does end up being highly sexual, you may end up with one that still isn’t into you. She won’t know this until she’s had sex with you several times.

Sorry. I honestly don’t know how virgins are supposed to figure this stuff out. Sexual self awareness requires experience.

We will hear stories by posters here who hit the jackpot with a virgin or close to it who ends up being a lifelong nympho. Simply Amorous is like that, and there are other examples. It seems the best bet for you to find a woman like her would be to watch for certain signs in the early relationship and ask lots of questions as it becomes appropriate, and then pray and cross your fingers if it all feels good. 

If you really believe that God wants this for you, He will help you find her. It is good that you even are aware of the down side of sexless marriages so that you can try to prevent one for yourself. That should be something every person considering a long term relationship is aware of and is wary of. 

Perhaps you can start up a new forum for virgins and inexperienced who are seeking others yet also are concerned about long term sexual compatibility. Maybe get some pastors or leaders from your church or others to contribute their thoughts. People who are having cold feet before tieing the knot would be looking for answers.

Your situation is different than those of us who have had plenty of sexual experiences, know our preferences, are self aware, and are seeking similar mates. We can just talk about this stuff with each on first dates. It doesn’t mean we are going to have sex that night or ever. It just means sex is highly important to us in any relationship and more than one date isn’t worth it if you can weed someone out immediately. But usually I’ve vetted someone really well before the first date and I know they have pinged my sexdar enough to spark interest.


----------



## the guy

PING

PING

PING

PING

PING


I make my self laugh sometimes!


----------



## NobodySpecial

BioFury said:


> You're not emotive or touchy at all? Or just in public? Would you be willing to share your masturbation habits as a kid and young adult?


Um, I think you could file that under don't do it or go to hell.


----------



## Blaine

BioFury said:


> Alrighty, I'm on the east coast, so I'll unfortunately have to take a rain check.
> 
> Masturbating a lot as a child seems to be the only constant so far. Strange. I would have thought a woman's cycle would be connected somehow.


Bio are you looking for a hormone connections?


----------



## Faithful Wife

By the way, I have to hunt for highly sexual males in the wild when I am dating. It is assumed (by some, certainly not all) that most men would cherish a sexual partner like me. But this is just far from true. 

There has to be compatibility. There are plenty of men who are definitely sexual people, who simply do not enjoy my type of sexual energy. We are not compatible.

So it isn’t like I can just choose any guy who is hot to me. I still have to snare him through actual chemistry, not just initial attraction. 

So I now have honed my own personal sexdar that I use for my own hunting to certain traits I’ve noticed that are similar in men I tend to feel good chemistry with. Most of these traits are so subtle I can’t even describe them. I’m pretty good at it now.

I’ve used this same type of sexdar to avoid certain men while I’m in a committed relationship. Like I will not hang out long at the desk of a guy at work who I know we are pinging each other even without intending to. I’m super aware of how my body reacts to other bodies at this point, and theirs to mine. Maybe for men that is easy because you’d just have a boner? 😆


----------



## Ynot

How would a woman know if she was a nympho or for that matter even liked sex until she has had it? 

I am like FW, I talk about sex on the first date. And I do it exactly how she has described. I move into the discussion because inevitably the question about why are you divorced comes up. If a woman doesn't want to talk about it, then I know she isn't someone for me. I have no interest in investing my time and effort in a relationship that will most likely never get off the ground.
In fact, sex is one of the first things I like to find out about a potential partner. I want to be with women who enjoy sex and can embrace their own sexuality. I have no interest in being with women who are ashamed of themselves, their bodies or their desires.
I also have no desire to be around some one who wants to wait until they get to know me better. Sex is one of the best ways to get to know someone. Once you have gotten naked with a woman, and shared a mutually satisfying experience, it seems all sorts of honesty presents itself. There is a reason why pillow talk is used to gain secrets in spy craft.


----------



## BioFury

NobodySpecial said:


> Um, I think you could file that under don't do it or go to hell.


ETA: You're saying your parents shamed you about the practice?


----------



## BioFury

Faithful Wife said:


> Because there is really no guaranteed way for any person to be self aware about their own sexuality if they are a virgin or very inexperienced. This includes you, by the way. You don’t actually know - if you are inexperienced yourself - if you would enjoy the sexual temperature in a relationship with a highly sexual woman.
> 
> Even if a person is thinking they are highly sexual before sexual activity and it turns out they are correct, they still do not know much yet about their preferences. So two virgins who talk openly about how much they can’t wait to get married and start their amazing sex life together, may get there and then feel absolutely no chemistry with each other. The sex would feel clumsy and not passionate. That’s just what it feels like with a partner you have no chemistry with for everyone. So if you are placing all your chips on a really good bet like a virgin who really does end up being highly sexual, you may end up with one that still isn’t into you. She won’t know this until she’s had sex with you several times.
> 
> Sorry. I honestly don’t know how virgins are supposed to figure this stuff out. Sexual self awareness requires experience.
> 
> We will hear stories by posters here who hit the jackpot with a virgin or close to it who ends up being a lifelong nympho. Simply Amorous is like that, and there are other examples. It seems the best bet for you to find a woman like her would be to watch for certain signs in the early relationship and ask lots of questions as it becomes appropriate, and then pray and cross your fingers if it all feels good.
> 
> If you really believe that God wants this for you, He will help you find her. It is good that you even are aware of the down side of sexless marriages so that you can try to prevent one for yourself. That should be something every person considering a long term relationship is aware of and is wary of.
> 
> Perhaps you can start up a new forum for virgins and inexperienced who are seeking others yet also are concerned about long term sexual compatibility. Maybe get some pastors or leaders from your church or others to contribute their thoughts. People who are having cold feet before tieing the knot would be looking for answers.
> 
> Your situation is different than those of us who have had plenty of sexual experiences, know our preferences, are self aware, and are seeking similar mates. We can just talk about this stuff with each on first dates. It doesn’t mean we are going to have sex that night or ever. It just means sex is highly important to us in any relationship and more than one date isn’t worth it if you can weed someone out immediately. But usually I’ve vetted someone really well before the first date and I know they have pinged my sexdar enough to spark interest.


Sure, the accuracy of my projections can only be so accurate without actually having sex with the person. But that's the reason for the thread, I want to learn more about what high drive women are like, so I can recognize the trait when I see it. You ladies have that trait, which makes you qualified. There has to be some similarities, even if it's only a history of masturbation.

If I could just have sex with anyone and everyone, then I could merely propose to whoever made the grade. But I can't, which forces me to use alternate methods. Such as using other behavior, like their masturbatory habits, as an indication of their over-all level of sexual desire, and then combine that with open communication about fantasies and expectations.

Yeah, we won't know precisely where we will land after we've been in bed for a year, but I can only hope that that our mutually expressed desires were accurate and legit. Thus landing us in a place where both of us are happy and fulfilled.

In your own relationships, what do you think the ratio has been of people you've "pinged" with, that you really jived with sexually after actually having sex. Versus those you pinged with, but realized you weren't sexually compatible after sleeping together?


----------



## Faithful Wife

Bio....it’s hard to come up with a ratio. I don’t have high numbers anyway, and I haven’t been “wrong” about anyone in that way since I was in my early 20’s. 

I can now easily tell just by a few make out sessions with clothes on if a guy will be a good chemistry match for me before going further. By then I have tested him out in other ways that help me know. 

If the make out doesn’t give me promise, I don’t sleep with him. So like I said, it hasn’t happened to me in so long that it isn’t very statistically relevant to my sex life anymore.

What I will not know from a make out or even good sex, is whether I will feel sustained desire for this person. 

However, I do know that within a month or so usually, if we are having regular sex during that time. If I’m still feeling a certain way about him sexually by then, I have a very high chance of the desire lasting. That’s just how my body works. 

But even then....I have no way of knowing if this person will change in some way that makes me lose attraction to them. 

At some level, everyone is taking a gamble.

But I do think you are headed in the right direction and just by prioritizing this before you meet a woman, I think you have a good head on your shoulders.


----------



## 269370

BioFury said:


> I wouldn't ask such a question until I knew the person well enough, and we were comfortable with each other. Cause it has tremendous potential for being taken the wrong way.
> 
> 
> 
> Yes, dishonesty, and the person's own ignorance, make getting a reliable answer frustratingly difficult. Which is why I was hoping there was some, seemingly unrelated, biological or behavioral trait, that linked high drive ladies together. But masturbating as a kid is really the only thing that appears to be shared among you all.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Well, yeah. My goal isn't to find the first high drive and settle down. Sexual compatibility can't be the exclusive basis for a marriage. I know how to find and spot the other qualities I am looking for, while this one is still a bit of a mystery. I never intended to give the impression that "nymphomania" was the only criteria that said female needed to meet. Merely that it is the one that I have no idea how to reliably identify.
> 
> 
> 
> Yes, I want a woman that wants me for me. But on the same token, I have a strong need for sexual fulfillment. So the woman I marry needs to be able to fill that need. Hence the desire for recognizing individuals with a high drive.



That’s probably because there isn’t really any reliable way to recognise if a woman is going to keep ****ing you until the undertakers come.

At the beginning of a relationship (first 1-2 years), you should be getting a lot of sex anyway but that’s a very poor predictor I to the future. And if she’s a true nympho, you may not be the only one getting sex with her. 

It’s strange, but all the girls I met that exhibited nymphomaniacal behaviour, I could not imagine having a life with for some reason.

I think as long as you know that sexual compatibility is one of the top priorities, that’s already a huge plus. And you don’t need a nympho for that.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## BioFury

inmyprime said:


> That’s probably because there isn’t really any reliable way to recognise if a woman is going to keep ****ing you until you until the undertakers come.
> 
> At the beginning of a relationship (first 1-2 years), you should be getting a lot of sex anyway but that’s a very poor predictor I to the future. And if she’s a true nympho, you may not be the only one getting sex with her.
> 
> It’s strange, but all the girls I met that exhibited nymphomaniacal behaviour, I could not imagine having a life with for some reason.
> 
> I think as long as you know that sexual compatibility is one of the top priorities, that’s already a huge plus. And you don’t need a nympho for that.
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


True. But I've never been talking about a true nymphomaniac. As Faithful Wife said, I just think it's a cute way to refer to women who are HD. Women like Faithful Wife, LeananSidhe, and personofinterest are the ones I mean. They're not insane, or open to screwing anything with two legs. They just want sex every day.


----------



## Cromer

There's a lot of false advertising out there. Just saying.


----------



## Faithful Wife

BioFury said:


> inmyprime said:
> 
> 
> 
> That’s probably because there isn’t really any reliable way to recognise if a woman is going to keep ****ing you until you until the undertakers come.
> 
> At the beginning of a relationship (first 1-2 years), you should be getting a lot of sex anyway but that’s a very poor predictor I to the future. And if she’s a true nympho, you may not be the only one getting sex with her.
> 
> It’s strange, but all the girls I met that exhibited nymphomaniacal behaviour, I could not imagine having a life with for some reason.
> 
> I think as long as you know that sexual compatibility is one of the top priorities, that’s already a huge plus. And you don’t need a nympho for that.
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
> 
> 
> 
> True. But I've never been talking about a true nymphomaniac. As Faithful Wife said, I just think it's a cute way to refer to women who are HD. Women like Faithful Wife, LeananSidhe, and personofinterest are the ones I mean. They're not insane, or open to screwing anything with two legs. They just want sex every day.
Click to expand...

I’m happy that you get this and understand that women like us exist. We aren’t even that rare. There are lots more women on TAM alone that haven’t replied yet, but I hope they still will. The more info on nymphos, the better!


----------



## 269370

BioFury said:


> True. But I've never been talking about a true nymphomaniac. As Faithful Wife said, I just think it's a cute way to refer to women who are HD. Women like Faithful Wife, LeananSidhe, and personofinterest are the ones I mean. They're not insane, or open to screwing anything with two legs. They just want sex every day.



Yes, with their husbands. If they were with someone else, perhaps they wouldn’t. But then again, they probably wouldn’t be with someone they wouldn’t want to have sex with.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## EleGirl

Might be a good time to bring up a thread from the past. 


*Women, what is your normal desire for sex? *



Daily or more? ................... 22 ...... 6.92% 
5-6 times a week? .............. 16 ...... 12.31%
3-5 times a week? .............. 53 ...... 40.77%
1-2 times a week? .............. 28 ...... 21.54%
1 time every two weeks? ....... 2 ...... 1.54%
1 time every 3 weeks? .......... 3 ...... 2.31%
1 time a month? .................. 2 ...... 1.54%
Less than 1 time a month? .... 1 ...... 0.77%
Never want sex? .................. 3 ...... 2.31%


----------



## EleGirl

Rocky Mountain Yeti said:


> What was inspirational was the way your whole description of self runs so counter to the commonly accepted narrative that people of our generation usually grow up with with regard to female sexuality.
> 
> The first level of narrative that did a great disservice was that women don't really enjoy sex.
> 
> The next level was that women tolerate sex to get the other things they want in life (i.e. kids, financial stability, diamonds and clothes, etc).
> 
> The next level was that of those very few who actually enjoy sex, they are incapable of fidelity. They were pejoratively labeled as ****s and consequently were not to be trusted under any circumstances.
> 
> Some of us were wise or aware enough to know better, but as overwhelming as that narrative was, it couldn't not influence most of our generation, as well as those generations who came before.
> 
> And what a dark, depressing vision of sexuality it was!
> 
> It's inspiring that that truth isn't so dark. Romantic relationships need not be the mere barter of love for sex of material goods for sex, etc. Both partners CAN have both emotional AND sexual fulfillment. How awesome to think a woman can be highly sexual AND loyal!
> 
> Hopefully, the current generation is being raised under a more enlightened approach.


This thread is a good example of the type of brain washing that women used to get, and some still get, about their own sexuality.

The choice of words in the thread title "Nymphos". - excessive sexual desire by a female
Definition of nymphomania
: excessive sexual desire by a female 
— nymphomaniac
— nymphomaniacal​
The idea that women do not enjoy sex was taught by "doctors" and "scientists" in the Victorian era through to about the 1960's. And still people have this idea that 'good girls" don't do that or want that. Women enjoying sex was actually considered a mental illness and some women were actually put in mental hospitals because it.

I think that what OP is really asking is how to spot a woman who has a healthy sex drive and attitude towards sex. At least I don't think he's asking how to tell which women are nymphos. 

I'm just amuses me that the title of the thread actually furthers the very **** shamming that causes a lot of women to hide their sexuality and to feel very insecure about being open sexually even in their marriage. 

Look at the link I posted in an above post... most women have a good, healthy sex drive. It's not some deep mystery to find one that does.


----------



## EleGirl

NobodySpecial said:


> I have No Earthly Idea what religions seem to get the knickers in such a twist about sex.


The reason that religions have strong rules about premarital is that back in the day (the thousands of years before birth control was invented) sex led to babies. Life was pretty rough in those days. A women who had no husband had a very hard time taking care of their children. It usually took two adults to hunt, farm, cook, weave cloth & make clothing, etc. If you look back in history, the societies that survived were those with strong family rules, to include rules against sex outside of marriage.

In our current modern times it's easy to forget that birth control has existed in only a few short years in history and that the very easy life we live now has no resemblance to the struggle that people had in the past to even survive.


----------



## 269370

But the OP is not asking how to find a woman with a ‘healthy drive’. He’s is asking how to spot a nympho...I’m still not entirely sure why. Maybe just to be doubly sure? 




EleGirl said:


> I think that what OP is really asking is how to spot a woman who has a healthy sex drive and attitude towards sex. At least I don't think he's asking how to tell which women are nymphos.







Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## minimalME

EleGirl said:


> Might be a good time to bring up a thread from the past.
> 
> *Women, what is your normal desire for sex? *
> 
> *Daily or more? ................... 22 ...... 6.92%*
> 5-6 times a week? .............. 16 ...... 12.31%
> 3-5 times a week? .............. 53 ...... 40.77%
> 1-2 times a week? .............. 28 ...... 21.54%
> 1 time every two weeks? ....... 2 ...... 1.54%
> 1 time every 3 weeks? .......... 3 ...... 2.31%
> 1 time a month? .................. 2 ...... 1.54%
> Less than 1 time a month? .... 1 ...... 0.77%
> Never want sex? .................. 3 ...... 2.31%


I responded to the thread above. 

I answered 'daily', but that's relative. 

I'm currently on my own, not willing to engage in casual sex. So, within me, my desire fluctuates. I masturbated 3 times yesterday, but then will go days without.

Being with a partner is different, and the sex is a way to connect, which I like feeling a lot.



inmyprime said:


> But the OP is not asking how to find a woman with a ‘healthy drive’. He’s is asking how to spot a nympho...I’m still not entirely sure why. Maybe just to be doubly sure?


In a relationship, I consider myself HD, yet responsive. The more I have sex, the more I want it. And the level of respect influences attraction.

I've only skimmed the thread, but I also had very early sexual experiences with male family members who behaved inappropriately. And I'm talking about adult men, not peers playing doctor. So that contributed to being turned on at a young age.

But even without that, I'm just sexually wired. I love the creativity of it. 

I started a tumblr account in order to create a portfolio of what my sexual preferences are - what I enjoy actually doing. I'm very pleasure driven (with zero tolerance for pain), and although I like to be in control occasionally, it turns me on to be told what to do.

@EleGirl I don't know that it'd be appropriate to share the link - because, although the images are all tasteful (more in the art range), it's still basically pornography.

It's purpose is to show a potential partner, 'This is what i like. Are we sexually compatible in terms of what you see? Are you willing to do these things?' And then of course, the other side is to find out what he prefers. And this discussion takes place prior to actually having sex.

Unfortunately, I'm pretty nunnish at the moment, so I have no one to direct my sexual energy towards.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson

Pre sex make out sessions with a women can be a hint, combined with other non-verbal interactions during first couple dates further assists to evaluate probable HD or LD. There are different tells if a woman is being mechanical or truly sexually passionate. Don't ask what they are because I can't list them, it's a feeling or connection conveyed between man/woman when getting to respectfully know each other. 

When a woman asks you out its always a good sign there's likely sex but even that doesn't tell you about her reasons. A caring and observant man has to listen to her body and mind together if shooting for ltr compatibility. 

For a sexually experienced man. As someone above mentioned if a man hasn't had any or much sex he won't have any references to draw on. He's still appreciative of sex that night if happens, as he should be.

Same for a young lady, she may be just getting to know herself.


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## personofinterest

The OP explained a few posts up that he was using the term Nympho as a cute way to refer to women with a high drive, which is what I had gathered anyway. As did most people on the thread, I assume. I mean, I am assuming that people like Faithful Wife don't actually mean they have a diagnosable psychological disorder.

It was pretty obviously not literal....


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## 269370

personofinterest said:


> The OP explained a few posts up that he was using the term Nympho as a cute way to refer to women with a high drive, which is what I had gathered anyway. As did most people on the thread, I assume. I mean, I am assuming that people like Faithful Wife don't actually mean they have a diagnosable psychological disorder.
> 
> 
> 
> It was pretty obviously not literal....




I know, any chance to pull Elegirl’s long avatar legs, I will take  Having a healthy, high sex drive for women is warmly embraced here and generally in the world (in my experience). What was happening 100+ years ago or in isolated villages is a different matter....
No woman would be told she is a ‘****’ for having a high drive. She may prefer and keep referring to herself as a dirty little **** in certain circumstances, but that’s a different topic...

I do wonder whether it is ‘cute’ though, using the word nympho. I thought it had negative connotations.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## minimalME

Ragnar Ragnasson said:


> Pre sex make out sessions with a women can be a hint, combined with other non-verbal interactions during first couple dates further assists to evaluate probable HD or LD.


I'm clueless when it comes to flirting, and I work really hard not to be visually or verbally provocative during early dating. IMO, it needs to be earned.

But I totally agree about the kissing - 100%. I can tell if we'd be sexually compatible by this.


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## LeananSidhe

minimalME said:


> Ragnar Ragnasson said:
> 
> 
> 
> Pre sex make out sessions with a women can be a hint, combined with other non-verbal interactions during first couple dates further assists to evaluate probable HD or LD.
> 
> 
> 
> I'm clueless when it comes to flirting, and I work really hard not to be visually or verbally provocative during early dating. IMO, it needs to be earned.
> 
> But I totally agree about the kissing - 100%. I can tell if we'd be sexually compatible by this.
Click to expand...

I actually agree with this too. I’m very shy when I’m getting to know someone and I can’t really see myself bringing up sex on a first date. I still blush if my husband talks about something we’ve done. 

But once we got to the kissing/making out stage....I’m sure my true nature would come out. My reservations fly out the window when I’m turned on and I wouldn’t be able to hold back. I think I’d be able to tell if I was sexually compatible with someone based on this. 
Like with my ex BF who assumed I was a virgin and never made a move. I was putting out all the signals and moaning and grinding on him in the back of his Jeep after prom and he just laid there kissing me. Ugh. Maybe things would have gone different if he would have known more about me but the fact that he wouldn’t even try it was so unattractive to me.


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## Ynot

Ok having read this thread all the way through, I have come to the conclusion that the premise in the OP is seriously flawed. Mostly based on ignorant assumptions and outdated stereotypes. Having no experience with sex, how can the OP assume that they would want a woman with HD aka a "nympho". The OP, lacking any real life experience himself, may come to realize that his fantasy of having sex daily or twice a day or whatever number of times he imagines as being "healthy", may not be to his liking. He may realize that once a week or once a month is all he wants. He may also realize that there may or may not be enough variety to keep him interested, or that the ratio of the variety may not be to his liking. These are just the things he doesn't know about himself. And that list is far from complete.
Then we have all of the variables that come with women. Drives change over time. Desires change over time. Hormones, life experiences, day to day life etc, all affect the sex drive in both the long and short terms. 
OP, rather than worrying about making a "mistake" or trying to make the "right choice". You need to take a chance and make mistakes and learn from them. Of course, the religious dogma, driving your choices is one of the reasons for the side discussion about religion. Because in your world view, you get one chance, so you want to make the right one. But the problem is you don't really have a clue what that might be, other than to base it on something you have only imagined but never experienced.


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## minimalME

LeananSidhe said:


> But once we got to the kissing/making out stage....I’m sure my true nature would come out. My reservations fly out the window when I’m turned on and I wouldn’t be able to hold back.


I can drink, have a passionate makeout session, and even sleep in the same bed without having sex.


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## personofinterest

minimalME said:


> I can drink, have a passionate makeout session, and even sleep in the same bed without having sex.


I could probably do this, but I'm not sure lol

A few weeks ago due to an injury, I was in pain and did not feel well, plus I had taken some muscle relaxers. I asked if we could cuddle for one night and apologized for feeling bad. He responded that he wasn't going to even try sex because he could tell I didn't feel well. 

Well....he was just so sweet, and rubbing my back, and he smelled good, and his arms are so......


Yeah, I attacked him


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## 269370

personofinterest said:


> I could probably do this, but I'm not sure lol
> 
> 
> 
> A few weeks ago due to an injury, I was in pain and did not feel well, plus I had taken some muscle relaxers. I asked if we could cuddle for one night and apologized for feeling bad. He responded that he wasn't going to even try sex because he could tell I didn't feel well.
> 
> 
> 
> Well....he was just so sweet, and rubbing my back, and he smelled good, and his arms are so......
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yeah, I attacked him




Reverse psychology works the best. He obviously wanted it all along. I thought that technique is only available to womenz 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## LeananSidhe

minimalME said:


> I can drink, have a passionate makeout session, and even sleep in the same bed without having sex.


Forgive my naivety, but do adults normally have passionate makeout sessions without having sex?

This is probably where my lack of dating experience shows.


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## minimalME

LeananSidhe said:


> Forgive my naivety, but do adults normally have passionate makeout sessions without having sex?


Sure. 

Did it as a teen all the time.


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## PigglyWiggly

LeananSidhe said:


> Forgive my naivety, but do adults normally have passionate makeout sessions without having sex?
> 
> This is probably where my lack of dating experience shows.


not this adult. Passionate kissing is the way I prefer to be turned on and I hold it as a very intimate act.....probably more so than oral.


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## LeananSidhe

minimalME said:


> LeananSidhe said:
> 
> 
> 
> Forgive my naivety, but do adults normally have passionate makeout sessions without having sex?
> 
> 
> 
> Sure. <a href="http://talkaboutmarriage.com/images/smilies/biggrin.gif" border="0" alt="" title="Big Grin" ></a>
> 
> Did it as a teen all the time.
Click to expand...

That’s why I said adult. Lol. I did it as a teen too but only because I couldn’t have sex for whatever reason (parents home). 

But I can’t imagine being an adult and having the option to have sex after passionately making out and not taking it. 
Again though, I have almost zero dating experience.


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti

LeananSidhe said:


> Forgive my naivety, but do adults normally have passionate makeout sessions without having sex?
> 
> This is probably where my lack of dating experience shows.


As far as I know, typically no, but I'm sure there are exceptions. 

Adults, especially men, are prone to thinking of making out without sex as something you do as teens, but you "outgrow" that once you become sexually active. 

Personally, I'm all for an occasional hot and heavy make out session without sex, for a couple of reasons.
1. As I said in another thread, kissing can be a fantastically intimate experience. If it's not expected to lead to sex, you can really concentrate, and draw a lot from, that aspect of it.
2. The making out can be a great sexual tension builder that can lead to a more explosive session later on if you have the ability to not give in to the initial desire and let things build. Teasing each other over period of time can really bring things to a head (so to speak).


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## Faithful Wife

LeananSidhe said:


> minimalME said:
> 
> 
> 
> I can drink, have a passionate makeout session, and even sleep in the same bed without having sex.
> 
> 
> 
> Forgive my naivety, but do adults normally have passionate makeout sessions without having sex?
> 
> This is probably where my lack of dating experience shows.
Click to expand...

I definitely make out with new dates before moving it to sex. I don’t have any issues getting hot and bothered but not having sex. I’m just used to being hot and bothered, I guess.

A great make out is required for me before going further because I’m not going to risk just going for sex without testing the goods out a little first. In other words, I’m not going to risk having any bad sex at all. If I agreed to sex before a make out session and then we got going and the guy can’t even kiss properly or his hands are clumsy and not passionate, it’s not as easy to back out at the last minute. “Oh oops, yeah I thought we were going to have sex but now that I know you don’t turn me on because you don’t even have basic skills, never mind. Bye!” It’s just too late at that point to get out of it in a classy way. 

I’m just unwilling to proceed to sex before I at least know there is a high probability that it’s going to be good sex. I’d rather have a stomach flu than have bad sex. Thankfully, I haven’t had any bad sex since my first marriage ended.

Since then, in my relationships, yes even after the initial dating and we are having sex regularly, we sometimes had make out sessions that didn’t lead to sex. Making out for it’s own sake is awesome!


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## minimalME

LeananSidhe said:


> But I can’t imagine being an adult and having the option to have sex after passionately making out and not taking it.


Well, just as one has self control as a young adult (teen), one has self control as an older adult.

Teasing and denial are a thing for me, so maybe that contributes to the lack of PIV not being an issue.

Although in all fairness, I make my boundaries super clear before I even meet someone.


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## Faithful Wife

Rocky Mountain Yeti said:


> LeananSidhe said:
> 
> 
> 
> Forgive my naivety, but do adults normally have passionate makeout sessions without having sex?
> 
> This is probably where my lack of dating experience shows.
> 
> 
> 
> As far as I know, typically no, but I'm sure there are exceptions.
> 
> Adults, especially men, are prone to thinking of making out without sex as something you do as teens, but you "outgrow" that once you become sexually active.
> 
> Personally, I'm all for an occasional hot and heavy make out session without sex, for a couple of reasons.
> 1. As I said in another thread, kissing can be a fantastically intimate experience. If it's not expected to lead to sex, you can really concentrate, and draw a lot from, that aspect of it.
> 2. The making out can be a great sexual tension builder that can lead to a more explosive session later on if you have the ability to not give in to the initial desire and let things build. Teasing each other over period of time can really bring things to a head (so to speak).
Click to expand...

I’ve found that all the men I’ve dated who I made out with were really excited about it and loved the reminder of how great it actually feels. There was even a time when I was dating but not having sex (because I was not emotionally ready for that at that time but I did want to have some light intimacy). So I told all my dates this. That I was not going to have sex with them but I’d love to make out and just feel that rush. 

Grown men I’ve dated are not squirming or pushing for sex because they know sex is fairly easy to get. They also understood my position and were happy I was self aware enough not to rush into sex when I knew I wasn’t ready for it. They enjoyed the warm fuzzy and sometimes hot zinging feeling from just making out with me. I think they also enjoyed the zero pressure of it. Like since we both knew it wasn’t going any further, they could sink into the make out and enjoy it for it’s own sake without thinking anything is happening next.

Of course, I told these guys this was temporary and I would have a sex life again, but I just couldn’t promise it would be with them. They all knew I was not trying to play a game, I was just protecting myself after an emotional downfall. They were kind and considerate about it and truly enjoyed dating and making out with me. 

This was one of the funnest parts of my dating adventures. It lasted for several months. When I finally got to the point where I felt healthy enough to have sex with someone, I began dating with a new intention. But those dates still started with make out sessions before sex, to test drive the goods a bit.


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## FrenchFry

.


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti

Faithful Wife said:


> I’ve found that all the men I’ve dated who I made out with were really excited about it and loved the reminder of how great it actually feels. There was even a time when I was dating but not having sex (because I was not emotionally ready for that at that time but I did want to have some light intimacy). So I told all my dates this. That I was not going to have sex with them but I’d love to make out and just feel that rush.
> 
> Grown men I’ve dated are not squirming or pushing for sex because they know sex is fairly easy to get. They also understood my position and were happy I was self aware enough not to rush into sex when I knew I wasn’t ready for it. They enjoyed the warm fuzzy and sometimes hot zinging feeling from just making out with me. I think they also enjoyed the zero pressure of it. Like since we both knew it wasn’t going any further, they could sink into the make out and enjoy it for it’s own sake without thinking anything is happening next.
> 
> Of course, I told these guys this was temporary and I would have a sex life again, but I just couldn’t promise it would be with them. They all knew I was not trying to play a game, I was just protecting myself after an emotional downfall. They were kind and considerate about it and truly enjoyed dating and making out with me.
> 
> This was one of the funnest parts of my dating adventures. It lasted for several months. When I finally got to the point where I felt healthy enough to have sex with someone, I began dating with a new intention. But those dates still started with make out sessions before sex, to test drive the goods a bit.


Awesome post. 

I've tried to do this within my marriage a couple times as a sort of reset button. Bring back the newness of dating and exploring each other's baselines as they have evolved. After all, we're both new people as time has passed. Sadly my wife wasn't really on board. But then she wasn't much on making out even before we became sexually active with each other. I suppose I should have spotted that as a red flag at the time.


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## minimalME

FrenchFry said:


> Not a whole lot of correlation between kissing as sex for me because sex is the complete opposite.




An awful kisser is repulsive for me. I've even tried to fight it a couple of times (in an attempt to be more flexible), but it ends up affecting my attitude - and the entire relationship.


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## FrenchFry

.


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## NobodySpecial

Ynot said:


> Ok having read this thread all the way through, I have come to the conclusion that the premise in the OP is seriously flawed. Mostly based on ignorant assumptions and outdated stereotypes. Having no experience with sex, how can the OP assume that they would want a woman with HD aka a "nympho". The OP, lacking any real life experience himself, may come to realize that his fantasy of having sex daily or twice a day or whatever number of times he imagines as being "healthy", may not be to his liking. He may realize that once a week or once a month is all he wants. He may also realize that there may or may not be enough variety to keep him interested, or that the ratio of the variety may not be to his liking. These are just the things he doesn't know about himself. And that list is far from complete.


OR he may not know that the frequency and "variety" that a "nympho" wants might BREAK him. I have definitely had men walk away from me as "too much"... with a smile but recognizing that that is not what he wanted.


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti

personofinterest said:


> The OP explained a few posts up that he was using the term Nympho as a cute way to refer to women with a high drive, which is what I had gathered anyway. As did most people on the thread, I assume. I mean, I am assuming that people like Faithful Wife don't actually mean they have a diagnosable psychological disorder.
> 
> It was pretty obviously not literal....


Yes, context is important. There are many labels we throw around that will have very different connotations based on how we are using them.


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## personofinterest

Rocky Mountain Yeti said:


> Yes, context is important. There are many labels we throw around that will have very different connotations based on how we are using them.


I have a friend who, when she is moody or indecisive, says, "I'm so bipolar today." It kind of annoys me as someone who's loved one has bipolar disorder, but I know she's just using it as an unofficial descriptor.


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## Ynot

LeananSidhe said:


> Forgive my naivety, but do adults normally have passionate makeout sessions without having sex?
> 
> This is probably where my lack of dating experience shows.


I liken the whole experience to buying a new car. When you go into the show room, you might look at few models. You may even have your heart set on one. Then you get in them to see if the fit. (I am tall and broad shouldered so I do not fit in every car or truck). This is the make out session. If it fits, you take it for a test drive. This is the sex part. If you like the ride, you buy the car. This is the relationship part of it.
There have been times I have made out with a woman and decided to pass. There have been other times I have made out with woman and waited. Usually, she was thinking about the experience as well and the next time we went out we ended up having sex.
Sorry for the analogy. But I don't understand people who would buy a car without making sure they will like it, any more than I can understand someone getting into a relationship with some one without ever having sex.


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## LeananSidhe

My husband likes to remind me that he got in my bra before we even had our first kiss. Lol. It’s a true story but we had a very unique arrangement. 
I obviously wouldn’t be that way with now with someone new... 

I guess maybe it depends on the intensity of the makeout session. When I think of “passionate makeouts” I’m imagining the hot and heavy necking, bodies grinding together kind of thing. That’s when I’d have a hard time stopping. 
I’m not talking about just passionate kissing after a date.


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## LeananSidhe

Ynot said:


> LeananSidhe said:
> 
> 
> 
> Forgive my naivety, but do adults normally have passionate makeout sessions without having sex?
> 
> This is probably where my lack of dating experience shows.
> 
> 
> 
> I liken the whole experience to buying a new car. When you go into the show room, you might look at few models. You may even have your heart set on one. Then you get in them to see if the fit. (I am tall and broad shouldered so I do not fit in every car or truck). This is the make out session. If it fits, you take it for a test drive. This is the sex part. If you like the ride, you buy the car. This is the relationship part of it.
> There have been times I have made out with a woman and decided to pass. There have been other times I have made out with woman and waited. Usually, she was thinking about the experience as well and the next time we went out we ended up having sex.
> Sorry for the analogy. But I don't understand people who would buy a car without making sure they will like it, any more than I can understand someone getting into a relationship with some one without ever having sex.
Click to expand...

No, the analogy makes sense to me. I think maybe I was misunderstanding what people meant by “passionately making out”. I was picturing hot and heavy necking between two people who are obviously enjoying themselves and wanting more. 
I wasn’t thinking about just kissing. 
Of course, I wouldn’t feel the need to hop into bed with someone after a few kisses, even passionate ones.


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## Ynot

Make out sessions are good indicators, but not perfect. Some women (and men I suppose) are great at making out, mainly because that is all they have ever done. I have been fooled a few times, thinking, "Wow, this woman is really into this!" only to find out it was just an act.


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## Faithful Wife

LeananSidhe said:


> My husband likes to remind me that he got in my bra before we even had our first kiss. Lol. It’s a true story but we had a very unique arrangement.
> I obviously wouldn’t be that way with now with someone new...
> 
> I guess maybe it depends on the intensity of the makeout session. When I think of “passionate makeouts” I’m imagining the hot and heavy necking, bodies grinding together kind of thing. That’s when I’d have a hard time stopping.
> I’m not talking about just passionate kissing after a date.


Yes I mean grinding and humping make outs. 

If I couldn’t control my passion and stop when I wanted to, I wouldn’t start.

Perhaps this is easier for me because I’ve had so much amazing sex in my life, I know there’s really no rush or reason to not enjoy lesser amounts of intimacy for their own sake. Or maybe like I said I’m just always hot and bothered anyway.


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## Ynot

LeananSidhe said:


> No, the analogy makes sense to me. I think maybe I was misunderstanding what people meant by “passionately making out”. I was picturing hot and heavy necking between two people who are obviously enjoying themselves and wanting more.
> I wasn’t thinking about just kissing.
> Of course, I wouldn’t feel the need to hop into bed with someone after a few kisses, even passionate ones.


So, the part about sitting in the car. You look around, reach for controls, adjust the seats, check the stereo system out, adjust the steering wheel etc. To me kissing after a date is like just looking in the windows. Making out is passionate, open mouth, tongue exploring kissing, exploring each others bodies with our hands, getting a feel for the other persons body. It may involve removal of clothing or loosening of clothing. One can usually gauge the excitement of the other person.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson

Lord, there is so much one learns from the first make out session with a new date. Also from the first couple dances with a woman. Or the kisses on the dance floor. From my single days of course.

But you have to truly be a great appreciator of the female person including form and mind and be truly "with" your date when your with her, if that makes sense. 

If she wants to dance belt buckle to belt buckle one has to be able to dance well. I do have to say for younger men especially, if you don't dance really well you're missing many opportunities.


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## CharlieParker

LeananSidhe said:


> My husband likes to remind me that he got in my bra before we even had our first kiss. Lol. It’s a true story but we had a very unique arrangement.
> I obviously wouldn’t be that way with now with someone new...
> 
> I guess maybe it depends on the intensity of the makeout session. When I think of “passionate makeouts” I’m imagining the hot and heavy necking, bodies grinding together kind of thing. That’s when I’d have a hard time stopping.
> I’m not talking about just passionate kissing after a date.


Good one. We like to say we had sex before our first date.

Agree on the making out.


----------



## LeananSidhe

CharlieParker said:


> LeananSidhe said:
> 
> 
> 
> My husband likes to remind me that he got in my bra before we even had our first kiss. Lol. It’s a true story but we had a very unique arrangement.
> I obviously wouldn’t be that way with now with someone new...
> 
> I guess maybe it depends on the intensity of the makeout session. When I think of “passionate makeouts” I’m imagining the hot and heavy necking, bodies grinding together kind of thing. That’s when I’d have a hard time stopping.
> I’m not talking about just passionate kissing after a date.
> 
> 
> 
> Good one. We like to say we had sex before our first date.
> 
> Agree on the making out.
Click to expand...

Same for us. We had sex twice (and had already done everything else) before I finally gave in and agreed to date him. We were engaged 6 months later. Lol.


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## personofinterest

I wonder if she qualifies.....


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## thefam

Rocky Mountain Yeti said:


> Yes!
> 
> Even today, there's a lot of flotsam and jetsam in the wake of that outmoded view.


LOL! You are right. That's not what I meant to say at all. Need to work on those writing skills!


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## badsanta

BioFury said:


> if there are behavioral similarities among a large percentage of high drive women, that would potentially make them recognizable in the dating pool.


 @BioFury Guy walks into a bar without his shirt. Bartender says, "no shirt, no shoes, no service!" Guy says, "I'm just looking!"


----------

