# Bisexual but monogamous



## marriedinpei (Jan 15, 2012)

Confession time - I am bisexual and before I met my wife, experimented with sex with men. Since starting to date her and since marriage, I have been monogamous. Sometimes it is a real struggle - especially when there has been very little sex between us. 

Are there any other men in a similar position?


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## marriedinpei (Jan 15, 2012)

Lots of reads, but no response. That's ok. Most guys would be reluctant to admit such things.

If any of you guys want to talk, feel free to message me.


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## Enchantment (May 11, 2011)

Hi marriedinpei ~

Is your wife aware of your bisexuality at all? Was it something she knew about your prior to marriage, after marriage, not at all?

You've mentioned in other posts that you have been in a sexless situation for some months. Was there something that happened - a catalyst - at that point in time?

Best wishes.


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## shy_guy (Jan 25, 2012)

My question is why you chose to label yourself as such? I'm not intending this to be a condemning question - I ask because we usually label ourselves with what we think of as important. In my case, I have no problem labelling myself as monogamous, but very seldom think to put any label on it beyond that. 

In another thread, I revealed that after I hit the 40's I had some bicuriosity. I soon found this to be pretty common especially among men my age. My curiousity was not strong enough for me to ever really want to act on it, but if it had wanted to actually act on it, I would still see myself as monogamous, and my committment to my wife would be enough to prevent that action.

It sounds like your committment to your wife is also strong enough to keep you from acting on your bisexual urges, so in my way of thinking, that makes you monogamous - a choice that we have both made. I wonder why you choose to label yourself as "bisexual but monogamous."


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## marriedinpei (Jan 15, 2012)

My wife is not aware of my bisexual past. The only catalyst i can think of re loss of sexual interest on her part was having children. Before kids we had a reasonable sex life.

It depends upon how one defines bi-sexuality and bi-curiosity. I have had sex with men in the past and I have urges that I don't act upon. I have no romantic interest in men, only raw sexual fantasies/urges. So, it might be more correct to describe me as bi-curious, past active, presently monogamus.


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