# What to do I am stuck in my marriage.



## rahul.kumar.bhatt (Aug 6, 2012)

My wife does not want to take interest in anything. Not want to do anything. Before the marriage , I said to her for finding the job, but she did not took it seriously and has not done anything. 
I said its okay, she will catch up later. After a year when I said many times to invest her time in some fruitful activities, she has not done anything. After a year, I stopped saying anything to her, I said she will take her own interest, but after three year of marriage, the daily activities of unfruitful things are really pinching me a lot and might be my suffocation is getting on highest level and there are many fights with her. If nothing is going to change then I would prefer to get separated as there would be no worth to continue such a disastorous life. I just want that she do her own things on time and invest her time in some fruitful activities , but she does not listen at all and invest her whole day in bull**** activities and later blames me that you don't support me, I go to office and when I come back I always ask how was your day and other activities, I am sick and tired of all these activities, I dont see any good future by seeing all these things. What should I do. Should I get separated or still there is hope that I can sustain, I do not want to do such thing, I never wanted to do but it is now over my head and everyday, I feel suffocating and helpless, I dont feel good about me.


----------



## Couleur (Apr 4, 2012)

I assume you do not have any children. That makes it easier to offer an ultimatum (change or I'll leave). 

Having said that, I think that you two would benefit from systematically talking about your expectations for your relationship. Seeing a marriage counselor might be a good idea. Or picking out a book on marriage and having you two both read it might work well. I like _His Needs, Her Needs_.

I'm also curious about whether your expectations and those of your wife are rooted in your family experiences. Did you mother work to support the family or did she spend time volunteering or caring for older relatives? Does your wife come from a family where her mom didn't work?


----------

