# Got an Email from the EX Cheater through linkedln......



## krismimo (Jan 26, 2011)

So today at work, I was minding my own business (as usual). I get a email that makes me want to scream. It came from my ex of almost 7 yrs. As much as I wanted to yell and cuss I couldn't because you know I was at work. The email was sent through Linkedln I don't have a Linkedln account never had one, he sent the request to add me as a contact through Linkedln and it shows his email address. 

At first I thought meh no biggie maybe it as a accident, this is the odd part, he sent the email to my new email address I never gave that to him I think he found it through FB or something. The email looked pretty generic it wasn't personal it looked like something like this "I would like to add you on my contacts through Linkeldln. and there was a add request that said please add ****** if you know him. HELL NAW I'm not going to add him, but I wonder what the hell does he want? it has been almost five yrs since I dumped him. Anyone that uses Like could you tell me how the request work? Thanks! K


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## walkonmars (Aug 21, 2012)

It's a generic message. The part you quoted wasn't written by him. He could have added something personal if he wanted. 

Looks like he's testing the waters. 

BTW, you must have a linkedin acct if he reached you that way. If you click on the link it will take you to the linkedin page that belongs to you. You can see who his contacts are if you want. 

But why bother right?


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## Pepper123 (Nov 27, 2012)

I believe you can add people based on mutual acquaintances as well, and I am sure you have plenty of those. 

But yes, you have to have an account.


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## krismimo (Jan 26, 2011)

Oh ok see I know he had one he has had one for years...


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## krismimo (Jan 26, 2011)

Right on it wasn't a personal message but at the same time how did it get my email? I cut ties with him and his friends so I just found it a bit strange....


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## krismimo (Jan 26, 2011)

oh wait I was mistaken it was sent to my old email address he would know that one, but still....


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## Mavash. (Jan 26, 2012)

I asked this question recently and found out if you sign up for linkedIn and you're not careful with the settings it will send out invites to EVERYONE in your contact list and maybe even those that have been previously deleted.

I asked because I was getting invites from people I haven't spoken to in years too. I just deleted the generic emails and went about my day after I learned how it works.


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## krismimo (Jan 26, 2011)

ohh ok whew I think that is what happened in this case at least I HOPE SO only time will tell...


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## Pit-of-my-stomach (Nov 2, 2010)

It is automatic. He has aol, yahoo, Hotmail or gmail presumably.


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## krismimo (Jan 26, 2011)

whew ok crisis averted thank you so much...


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## thebadguy (Dec 7, 2012)

There are also viruses out there that do the same thing...pretend to be LinkedIn, send an email to everyone in your contact list. You click 'ok'...you get the virus. Then everyone you know will get the same email from you...maybe even him if he is still in your contact list somewhere. 

My wife (I am the cheating spouse) got such an email from the OWH. I couldn't convince her he just had a virus and wasn't trying to connect with her. So she emailed him through the email address she already had for him and he was all "uh..sorry. I had a virus on my PC."


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## krismimo (Jan 26, 2011)

Ok guys so today I got another email from "Like" again, reminding me to accept my ex's invitation. So????... what's the deal?


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## Acoa (Sep 21, 2012)

You need to take action on the original invite or it will keep popping up. 

You can add, lol, not really... Or
You can hit ignore. 

Once you hit ignore it will go away unless he sends out a new invite. I think there is an option to ignore all requests from this user, but I have never tried it.


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## krismimo (Jan 26, 2011)

the problem is there is no ignore option.


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## Rob774 (Sep 27, 2010)

He's fishing... baby stepping his way, but fishing nevertheless. Hoping that a nice, pleasant, non-personal outreach through LinkedIn will get things going again with you guys. Some guys think time will heal all wounds. My wife would go out with friends, and would come across a loser ex, who'd approach her and pretend like nothing ever happened. So he's just hoping you are weak.


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## whatslovegottodowithit? (Jan 6, 2013)

An idea:

First, forward the email to LinkedIn and tell them this needs to stop AND that you are reporting this as SPAM to your email provider. If these emails further continue, you will file a complaint with the FTC and your State's Attorney General for harrassing you. There is also nothing wrong to find LinkedIn's physical address and complain online to the local Better Business Bureau which will force LinkedIn to address the complaint.
***Keep the emails you send as you may need to copy the text in the future should this continue. You can create a folder called "Online Safety" so you can easily find them later if needed. It will show when you first brought this to someone's attention***

Second, forward as SPAM to the email provider your ex uses (i.e. Y!, Hotmail, etc...) send to [email protected](Y!, Hotmail, etc...) as he used your email address from one of those accounts (he HAD to allow LinkedIn access to your address via his email provider).

Third, in your email client, direct the email to the SPAM folder. Any future similar requests will also go straight to your SPAM folder.

Fourth, be aware of what the laws about spamming actually say (It will make you more informed when you file complaints) :

Laws Against Spam: CAN-SPAM Act

How to Report Spam

You may also choose to advise your employer (if using a work email client) that you are being spammed. There truly is a 'blacklist' of spammers that enterprises subscribe to in order to prevent an attack on their network(s). It will 'blacklist' the IP Address (the service provider the email is sent from) and prevent those who send ANY email from that IP Address to get to most enterprise/business email address. I work for a local government entity that stupidly provided a "Public Wi-Fi" and somebody spammed while connected to it. Important, urgent communication from outside agencies got halted and took many days to clear-up the 'blacklist' status. 

People often just turn their back to spam (txt and email) and that is how it festers! It will take time to properly report and complain, but can save you and your organization in the end!!


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## krismimo (Jan 26, 2011)

Rob thank you for the response, but no I'm not going to take the bait, besides I'm the crazy one right? (Rolls eyes). I'm happily married now...Thanks to his mistake I met the person that I was suppose to be with. I think the only thing I hate about it is even after all this time when I saw his name pop up in my email I cringed...


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## krismimo (Jan 26, 2011)

What's thank you for all the useful info. I did see and unsubscribe option and hopefully that will do the trick if not, then I'm go to have to do the following that you suggested. Thanks again.


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## janefw (Jun 26, 2012)

I have never had a LinkedIn account but I get requests sometimes from people to be their friend (or whatever). I always ignore them and I think you should ignore this one.


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