# who here agrees this relationship should not be happening?



## btch

I 30, attractive, work, responsible, and am married to a man my own age. We are perfect together and the same age. He works at an Electrical company and I got to leave my job and stay at home to take care of the kids. We have 2 little ones. We are a black family!


Women in their 20's should be out partying and having fun. Men often are pigs.what do these young 20 something women have that I don't have? These men go after them because they can't handle a real woman.A true and mature relationship. My sister has been seeing my personal trainer, this guy who is 33 year old white boy, fit like a male model, just moved out on his own for the first time as he graduated college and has a career in health and exercise, and is a virgin. She told me that he has had difficulties in life earlier such as upbringing, being bullied, and a slower learner. Real winner eh? Plus instead of drinking, he smokes marijuana. Thats no good. My sister is a shy, petite, wide eyed,bouncy, attractive 20 year old who can get any man she wants as every guy she passes seems to take interest. How gross is that? They are in a serious relationship. She is a fitness model. Used to be a cheerleader. Even has offers to pose for Playboy Magazine. How shallow is this man. What could these two possibly have in common ? Their enganged to get married after a year and a half of seeing each other.They seem inseperable. Kinda gross if you ask me.

Makes me wanna be sick to my stomache. People are supposed to be with their own age groups.This poor poor girl is wasting her youth. Her one and only youth on this man who is in his 30's. Sad really. Makes me mad at this monster for falling in love with such a young woman. It disgusts me but it is kinda my fault as I asked my sister if she owuld train with me a few session, and the two just met. Before him, she was in 2 relationships. This guy had none before my little sis. All this selfish man wants is a hot young body at night I bet. Why can't he get someone his OWN age?


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## Maricha75

Are you sure it's the age...or skin color...that bothers you most? Seriously, get over it. Your sister is a big girl who can take care of herself. Butt out. You are married. He is not. Who he chooses to be with is of no concern to you. Frankly, you sound jealous that your trainer is interested in your sister and not you. What's gross about your sister being in a relationship with this man? Nothing. What is gross is the fact that you think you have a right to dictate what is acceptable to soemone else. Seriously, grow up. 

I bet you think it's gross that I am 6 years older than my husband, too, huh? Never mind the fact that he was 17 when we met.... and I was the one who took his virginity. Guess what? It doesn't concern you... nor does your sister's relationship with your trainer. Get over it.


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## anchorwatch

What are you looking for? You're already a judge of what should make someone else happy. Why even ask for other opinions?


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## BrockLanders

How does a slow learner finish college?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Holland

This is the same story that a user posted last week, word for word. So now they have started a new account to post the same rubbish.

Why do people bother with such stuff?


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## HarryDoyle

I made a wrong turn, I thought this was the Long Term Success in Marriage forum.


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## relationshipsguide_gal

Hi btch, Sorry but I would have to agree with the other comments. Your sister is 20 years old with a mind of her own. Why should you keep them from being happy? It's really none of your business, sorry. It would be best if you just stick with your own relationship. Also, just think what your sister thinks or how she feels about you butting in her own life. Nobody likes to be dictated what to do with his or her own life. And oh, stop being judgmental, it would be for your own good.


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## Broken at 20

Have you met and had a conversation with this man? 
Or are you simply going by your first impression of this man?


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## PBear

I'm with the others... You should just stay out of it. Your sister is a big girl and needs to take care of herself. IMO, she shouldn't be engaged to ANYONE (white, black, young, old) for another 5 years, but my opinion is even less valuable than your own...

C


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## I'mInLoveWithMyHubby

Someone that has a career in Heath and exercise is not going to smoke pot. I'm not sure where your getting your info on your sisters SO. 

I know many personal trainers, people at the gym, people who are in exercise groups/clubs, running/triathlon clubs and not one single person smokes. My husband races in ironmans and other triathlons and marathons. I was a runner myself and did many races. I was at the gym daily. People who are health conscious are not into smoking.


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## PBear

My running coach came out to visit me a few years ago to do a relay race with me. I has known him for a year online. That's when I found out he was a smoker and border-line alcoholic. And he could STILL qualify for "elite" status at races!

C


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## SimplyAmorous

btch said:


> *Women in their 20's should be out partying and having fun*.


 Not everyone cares for this lifestyle...and who says she is not having FUN... You talk about maturity, partying is not necessarily mature at all. It can be downright wreckless. 



> Men often are pigs.what do these young 20 something women have that I don't have?


 Not sure I understand this comment ...other than you sound Jealous, that he should want YOU...as you are more his age... you are also married... and happily so - so you claim... what gives ? 



> These men go after them because they can't handle a real woman.A true and mature relationship. *My sister has been seeing my personal trainer, this guy who is 33 year old white boy, *fit like a male model, just moved out on his own for the first time as he graduated college and has a career in health and exercise, *and is a virgin*.....
> 
> She told me that he has had difficulties in life earlier such as upbringing, being bullied, and a slower learner. Real winner eh? Plus instead of drinking, he smokes marijuana. Thats no good.


 Your need to take anything (in this case his smoking marijuana..maybe he doesn't smoke it NOW but was in the past?....His slow learning in his youth, his virginity & his age) to put him down .....you are either terribly judgemental or jealous..... 

Can we just be honest here. You LIKE this man very much, this is why HE is your personal Trainer...you also love his body as you say he could be a male model... .he isn't THAT much of a Loser, or he wouldn't have graduated College.....




> My sister is a shy, petite, wide eyed,bouncy, attractive 20 year old who can get any man she wants as every guy she passes seems to take interest. How gross is that? They are in a serious relationship. She is a fitness model. Used to be a cheerleader. Even has offers to pose for Playboy Magazine. How shallow is this man. What could these two possibly have in common ? Their engaged to get married *after a year and a half of seeing each other.They seem inseperable*. Kinda gross if you ask me.


 I don't think it is gross at all, in fact I think your sister is a very very wise woman to NOT jump in bed with every willing JOHN who is HOT, to not be out partying till the sun comes up and to have found a man who kept his Di** in his pants - for something lasting... 

If he is as FIT as you seem to explain here, I bet he's had his share of opportunites to take women down... I applaud him ! 

Would you rather your sister be dating the Philandering type who bed 50 women before her? You referring to him as a PIG - (more related to age as the rest makes no sense at all) is just misplaced badly. 

My goodness they have been together *a year and a half *...*and they are inseparable*... I'd say this is a hell of a good sign of compatibility...:smthumbup:



> Makes me wanna be sick to my stomache.


 Another emotion can do this... The one that starts with J. . 



> People are supposed to be with their own age groups.*This poor poor girl is wasting her youth.*


 Many might have felt that about me too... I married a virgin male, we didn't party....and we were inseparable too... still are after 31 yrs. 



> Her one and only youth on this man who is in his 30's. Sad really. Makes me mad at this monster for falling in love with such a young woman.


 Now you are calling him a MONSTER... tell me something.... How has this MONSTER hurt your sister ? Has he beat her up, disrespected her, lied to her... 



> It disgusts me but it is kinda my fault as I asked my sister if she would train with me a few session, and the two just met. Before him, she was in 2 relationships. This guy had none before my little sis.


 What, you would prefer she has 5 more relationships and breakups before she finds TRUE LOVE... 

Of course maybe he is lying to her through his teeth and has slept around... but if they have thrived and been inseparable for over a year & a half... surely some red flags would come to light....

Wondering if he is still YOUR personal trainer ? 

Other than all I have just said.. me personally wouldn't care for a man THAT much older.. .It would be a deal breaker.... but ya know...it works for some.... so let it be.


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## Stonewall

Ok so I'm a pig! And your point is?


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## firefly789

Not everyone wants to spend their youth partying. I didn't. I also married an older man. He is college educated, so he has career opportunities.


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## Wiserforit

btch said:


> Women in their 20's should be out partying and having fun. Men often are pigs.what do these young 20 something women have that I don't have? These men go after them because they can't handle a real woman.


They have the hot young body you don't have. 

Being bitter and spiteful about it just puts you that much further behind in terms of attractiveness.


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## Coffee Amore

Holland said:


> This is the same story that a user posted last week, word for word. So now they have started a new account to post the same rubbish.
> 
> Why do people bother with such stuff?


I know, right... why do people post the same thing when some of us can remember the previous posts. :scratchhead:


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## krismimo

Now that is determination

I don't agree with anything that your saying for so many reasons. I dated outside my race as well, for one I think your low key jealous of your sister and the trainer. I don't care about color as long as she is happy. Two the age is just age. To answer your question you assume that men or all men have not tried dating women and or married to women their own age, I can't tell you how many women who are older than me make a** hats of themselves and taking for granted really good men, this is a double edge sword this works both ways.


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## Wiserforit

krismimo said:


> I can't tell you how many women who are older than me make a** hats of themselves and taking for granted really good men, .


Yup, the OP is just oozing with entitlement.


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## althea0212

Love knows no gender, age or culture. If they are so much in love, be happy for them. They are within the right age, independent and capable of deciding for themselves. You cannot control your sister's life and be too overprotective. Just be supportive when they need you.


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## Ano

I think you should be happy that she is happy. Age and race mean nothing.


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## somethingelse

I swear I've posted in a thread almost exactly like this one before


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## Sussieq

Holland said:


> This is the same story that a user posted last week, word for word. So now they have started a new account to post the same rubbish.
> 
> Why do people bother with such stuff?


For the attention.


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