# Not enough sex?



## pussicatangel (Mar 16, 2014)

I love sex. I am a young attractive healthy woman and i want to have a happy healthy sex life. 

The problem is that lately I feel like I have to bug my husband to sleep with me much of the time. 

It wasn't always like this...infact it used to be the other way around. I was depressed & my sex drive went poof. Now I am healthy & I want sex all the time. I can not get enough of it. I want it everyday & would love it multiple times a day.

My husband works alot of hours. He is also in very bad shape (I am not) so he is not healthy. He is having trouble sleeping & is tired all the time because of his bad sleep schedule & bad eating habits.

So he is too tired often. But idk it is hard for me to deal with this. Even though rationally I know a man shouldn't just want sex all the time & never turn it down, it is still hard to be turned down...it is killing my confidence. 

I am beautiful, sexy, and I want sex all the time. Shouldn't I be every husbands dream? I am willing to try new things, make it fun & interesting. Anything. And when we do have sex it isn't horrible, its good sometimes great. I am having orgasms. But because of his health/fitness I am almost always on top & it gets boring for me. After I am often still wanting to go again & he has fallen asleep which is really just a killer blow to me.

IDK what to do. he refuses to go to the doctor right now or make healthier changes. Talking about it just turns into a fight. If I bring up sex he just gets upset & hurt like he isn't good enough. 

I love him. I love being with him. I just want so so much more...


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## usmarriedguy (Dec 9, 2013)

There is not much you can do if the spouse is unwilling to change. 

Sometimes people will actually change when they are forced to. Tell him that if he wants to live like that he can do it on his own. 

I have type 2 diabetes now partly because I carried extra weight for 20 years. It is an epidemic in the US -bad health cost a lot of money. 

I would start by changing the diet. We have so much good information these days about how to eat and what happens when we do not take care. 

It isn't just about looking good, being overweight is like poison. After losing 30 pounds out of 50 I need to loose I have so much more energy and a happier and more positive attitude about life. At 52 I feel more like 40 and once the other twenty are gone I expect to feel like I am 30 again. 

The hardest part was getting started.


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## pierrematoe (Sep 6, 2013)

Sorry for your troubles. This story sounds a lot like mine in reverse. Also sounds like my wife about 75 lbs ago. She's lost the weight thank goodness but still complains of being tired all the time especially when we climb in bed together. She works her tail off and I get that but c'mon right?

Have you had a heart to heart talk with him about you not being happy with the current conditions of your married life?


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## pussicatangel (Mar 16, 2014)

Thanks for the replies. It is just so difficult and I feel like I have no one to talk to.

I was overweight & I am diabetic. I have a panic disorder & had alot of sex issues because I was raped when I was younger. It made sex difficult. He tried being understanding but it was hard for us. We drifted apart & it came to the point where we were never having sex almost. When we did it was a huge issue for me where I would panic & be in tears. (not sexy)

He stood by me through all of that. So I kindof feel like a huge ***** now. 

But I came to a turning point where I had to change. I went to stay with my family & I got better. I lost weight, made huge changes in my life for the better but during that time he cheated on me. 

We just got back together and he tells me he loves me & wants to be with me and only me. But being cheated on killed a part of me. I can't move past it. And I keep thinking maybe he is still cheating on me and that is why....

He tells me how beautiful I am. How much he loves that I have lost this weight, how sexy I am. But then he doesn't seem interested in touching me. How confusing is that? 




Changing his health is difficult. He doesn't want to change. We rarely eat together so I can't just give him something different & if I did he wouldn't eat it. 

I talk to him but he is just dismissive. He tells me he is just not well & that he has tried everything to feel better (he hasn't), he blames it on sleep apnea. He says he is having problems getting hard because of his health. That he loves me more then anything & thinks I am beautiful & is very much attracted to me. So I just then feel horrible.

I just want sex & intimacy. I dont know what to do.


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## usmarriedguy (Dec 9, 2013)

Who initiated getting back together? If it was him than I think you have some leverage if it was you than maybe he does not really care and you would be better off with someone who will not drag you down with them.


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