# Advice needed



## prodriver (Jan 27, 2014)

Hi all. Last year I posted that I've had problems with my wife that shes not affectionate, etc and I wanted to leave her but struggled due to kids. 

Anyway, cutting long story short, I really like this lady and im not 100‰ sure if she likes me. 

Ive known her for 5 years now (shes my customer), I take her to airport and back. 

She lives in greece but comes to work here. 

Anyway when she sees me she comes running up to me, gives me a very tight hug and a kiss on both cheeks (abit strange to do that to a driver). 

Anyway I asked her if we can go for a meal together when she comes and she agreed and we went for a meal. 

Every now and again she touches my hand and my back for little things she says im so nice. 

I got her a necklace (cheap one lol) and she was so pleased with it. 

Am i wrong in thinking she likes me? 

Also, I am worried about my kids. I dont wana leave them but have good grounds on custody as my 11 year old texd me to say she threw a shoe at him. 

Can someone on here please put me in the right direction? 

Also, I don't want to spoil the relationship with this woman by asking her if 
She likes me in that way. I once said to her shes a lovely person and she replied I am very good with all my boyfriend's. 

But with women you never know. Is she giving me signals and im not taking it or is she just being too friendly?


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## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

If you can't fix the relationship you're in, end it before you start another. There are always women out there that will give you attention, a good relationship is much more than that. 

You sound as if your are needy and insecure about this woman as your wife. Have you done anything to improve yourself since you were here last? 

Best


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## prodriver (Jan 27, 2014)

Only thing is I don't wana lose both. This other woman is honestly best woman ive ever met. Thing is I dont want to end it then go in a mess if the other one doesnt think of me in that way.

With improvement, I have tried alot of things to make it work. 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## prodriver (Jan 27, 2014)

Only thing is I don't wana lose both. This other woman is honestly best woman ive ever met. Thing is I dont want to end it then go in a mess if the other one doesnt think of me in that way.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

So, in effect, you are sort of asking if it is OK for you to cheat on your wife, the mother of your kids.

The answer would be no. It isn't.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## KillerClown (Jul 20, 2016)

I looked at your previous posts. You ask for advice and you get plenty but you don't do anything with them and disappear. Are you going to do the same thing with this thread?


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## prodriver (Jan 27, 2014)

I did alot of things to make it work. Ive spoken to her, lost weight to see if she would change but no difference. 

I do take advice honestly
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

prodriver said:


> I did alot of things to make it work. Ive spoken to her, lost weight to see if she would change but no difference.
> 
> 
> 
> ...




I went down the path you are going. Don't do it. It will only end in disaster. You can't see that now but you will regret it later.


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## Spicy (Jun 18, 2016)

Just so I'm clear...are you saying you are still married and living with your wife and kids? And that in that state you are persuing another woman, taking her on dates and buying her jewelery?

If the answer is "yes" then shame on you. End your marriage before staring to date!!!! I would like to throw a shoe at you...


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## prodriver (Jan 27, 2014)

You have no idea what i went through with my current wife. She deserves every bit of it. What comes around goes around.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

prodriver said:


> You have no idea what i went through with my current wife. She deserves every bit of it. What comes around goes around.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


This isn't about your wife, it's about you.


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## TAMAT (Jun 20, 2015)

Prodriver,

Keep in mind that this OW you believe is so wonderful is willing to cheat with you on your W to whom you are still married. This OW is also willing to destroy your childrens' family which is even less forgivable.

I perfectly well understand the ego boost when a female you don't know pays you attention, it's like a drug, but like most drugs it clouds your judgement.

I haven't read your posts, but if you are cheating with this OW because your W cheated on you that is unfortunate, because your children now have two cheating parents rather than one. Also your W has turned you into a cheater just like her. 

Tamat


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## prodriver (Jan 27, 2014)

But then shes probably only seeing me as a good friend. Who knows?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Married27years (Jun 16, 2016)

Hello you are married. You shouldn't even be looking at other women. Either fix your marriage and stay or leave and be on your own. Don't be a typical whimpy man and only leave your marriage when you have another women waiting in the wings. I see that so much and it's sad that most men can't be alone.


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## citygirl4344 (Mar 4, 2016)

prodriver said:


> But then shes probably only seeing me as a good friend. Who knows?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_




Who knows. Who cares right now...you are still married. Leave your current relationship before Persuing anything with this new woman. 


Sent from my iPhone


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

She's out of your league. Sorry.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

prodriver said:


> You have no idea what i went through with my current wife. She deserves every bit of it. What comes around goes around.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Yeah you sound like a real prize. I am sure all the problems were because of your wife. Cut the crap, go cheat if you want to but at least admit you are doing evil to your wife (you wouldn't be posting on here if you didn't know it was wrong). Or have the balls to end your marriage and move on.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

prodriver said:


> I once said to her shes a lovely person and she replied I am very good with all my boyfriend's.


This says it all, I am sure you are one of many. She likes the attention, keep in mind if she knows you are married then she has no problem with going out on dates with married men. Not the best choice for anything else but FWB (when you are single!). Hey she got a free dinner and a necklace out of it though so works for her. 

If this is "the best woman you ever met" then you need to get out more.


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## jb02157 (Apr 16, 2014)

I don't see anything here that would lead me to believe she looks at you as a possible love interest. The hugging and the kissing on both cheeks is a cultural thing.


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## ericthesane (May 10, 2013)

1. You are her driver.
2. She has a profession/job that entails frequent international travel. That usually mean that her skill sets are sought after, and compensated accordingly. 

You see the imbalance here ?

3. She hugs and kisses and touches hands... Maybe this is a reflection of her culture and personality; chances are that this is how she behaves with most people. 

Any chance that you read waaaay too much into this ?


And... deal with wife first. If you both decide that ending it is the best, THEN, go out and about, but not before that.


and... the adage of not mixing business and pleasure is such for a reason.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

TAMAT said:


> Prodriver,
> 
> Keep in mind that this OW you believe is so wonderful is willing to cheat with you on your W to whom you are still married. This OW is also willing to destroy your childrens' family which is even less forgivable.
> 
> ...


If he remembered to tell her he is married?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Acoa (Sep 21, 2012)

Step one, end marriage.

After that you can look to finding another woman. If you are only staying married until you are sure you have a better option, then you are the one with the problem, not your wife.


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## Blondilocks (Jul 4, 2013)

No buying jewelry for customers. Ever.


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## Yeswecan (Jul 25, 2014)

prodriver said:


> Only thing is I don't wana lose both. This other woman is honestly best woman ive ever met. Thing is I dont want to end it then go in a mess if the other one doesnt think of me in that way.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Sorry my man, you can't have your cake and eat it too. Advise the W things are not working out. Either work on it or let her go find someone who respects her. When that is complete you may go get your cheeks kissed and a meal.


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## prodriver (Jan 27, 2014)

Things is, we both have agreed to spend a whole day out together. She knows that i am married and having endless problems. 

She said she will pay and we are going for a whole day out and i told her my wife must not know about this and she said she'll keep it quiet. 

I am going to tell her on that day and see how she responds. Im gonna tell her I miss her when she leaves and going to ask her to hold hands. 

See how she responds.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## prodriver (Jan 27, 2014)

Yes its a cultural thing maybe but she has mentioned it so many times i am so nice to her and she was complimenting on my eyes and looks
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## citygirl4344 (Mar 4, 2016)

prodriver said:


> Things is, we both have agreed to spend a whole day out together. She knows that i am married and having endless problems.
> 
> 
> 
> ...




Excuse me.
Completely inappropriate and disrespectful to yourself and your wife and your children. If you are unhappy then end the marriage. Don't go down a cheating path. 


Sent from my iPhone


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## Prodigal (Feb 5, 2011)

prodriver said:


> Things is, we both have agreed to spend a whole day out together. She knows that i am married and having endless problems.
> 
> She said she will pay and we are going for a whole day out and i told her my wife must not know about this and she said she'll keep it quiet.


Your thread is titled "Advice needed." What advice is it you are seeking? You are going to spend the day with another woman. Okay, your life to do as you please.

But I'm honestly puzzled about the advice thing ...


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## prodriver (Jan 27, 2014)

My advice is asking for opinions if she likes me in that way (as a partner) because of the way she acts. Ive had some opinions that its greek culture but i cant be sure. 

Another advice is children who comes 1st. The custody because ive got proof she hit my son with a shoe on his head.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

Right, now I have serious doubts if you are using an of act discipline as an accusation of child abuse, attempting to weight the scales in your favor. Let me give you a bit of real advice, solve your problems on your own. If you look to the courts to solve your family problems the reality of it is you will be giving up any say in what the outcome will be. 

Stop lashing out like a little boy who's been wronged and work to solve your family problem, instead of looking for other women. 

Best


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## prodriver (Jan 27, 2014)

Acts of discipline a shoe thrown at a childs head? Ok if you say so.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

Spicy said:


> Just so I'm clear...are you saying you are still married and living with your wife and kids? And that in that state you are persuing another woman, taking her on dates and buying her jewelery?
> 
> If the answer is "yes" then shame on you. End your marriage before staring to date!!!! I would like to throw a shoe at you...


A shoe made in Molotov, Russia.

An old fashion design that puts fire in one's step.


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## prodriver (Jan 27, 2014)

Lol
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

anchorwatch said:


> Right, now I have serious doubts if you are using an of act discipline as an accusation of child abuse, attempting to weight the scales in your favor. Let me give you a bit of real advice, solve your problems on your own. If you look to the courts to solve your family problems the reality of it is you will be giving up any say in what the outcome will be.
> 
> Stop lashing out like a little boy who's been wronged and work to solve your family problem, instead of looking for other women.
> 
> Best





prodriver said:


> Acts of discipline a shoe thrown at a childs head? Ok if you say so.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


If that's all you got out of my post, you've got a long slog ahead.

Wish you and your family well.


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## prodriver (Jan 27, 2014)

I have actually got 2 different jobs which im not going to mention so shes definitely not out of my league.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

prodriver said:


> I have actually got 2 different jobs which im not going to mention so shes definitely not out of my league.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


First Job......Uber Driver

Second Job.......Uber Leutnant at the German Embassy.


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## citygirl4344 (Mar 4, 2016)

prodriver said:


> I have actually got 2 different jobs which im not going to mention so shes definitely not out of my league.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_




You are not understanding the point. You have absolutely no right to be starting a relationship or whatever this is with another woman while you are married. I don't care how bad the marriage is. 


Sent from my iPhone


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## She'sStillGotIt (Jul 30, 2016)

prodriver said:


> But then shes probably only seeing me as a good friend. Who knows?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Pass her a note next time you see her. You know, like we all did in grammar school.

You can write, "do you like me?" Then put a box for yes and a box for no and ask her to check off one.

Thanks for the trip down Memory Lane back to 8th grade. Jeez.


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## prodriver (Jan 27, 2014)

If you say so. Ill let you think that but its shocking people don't read a book and judge it. Well done
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

prodriver said:


> Things is, we both have agreed to spend a whole day out together. She knows that i am married and having endless problems.
> 
> She said she will pay and we are going for a whole day out and i told her my wife must not know about this and she said she'll keep it quiet.
> 
> ...



This thinking right here is going to cause you an immense amount of problems in your life going forward. Write it down, right here is where it going to start. You can't say you weren't warned. I am warning RIGHT NOW! This girl see you as nothing more then some ego boosting.

You better get ready for the pain OP. First up loosing your job. Gonna be harder to get you kids when you don't have a job.


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## prodriver (Jan 27, 2014)

sokillme said:


> This thinking right here is going to cause you an immense amount of problems in your life going forward. Write it down, right here is where it going to start. You can't say you weren't warned. I am warning RIGHT NOW! This girl see you as nothing more then some ego boosting.
> 
> You better get ready for the pain OP. First up loosing your job. Gonna be harder to get you kids when you don't have a job.


How will i lose my job?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

prodriver said:


> How will i lose my job?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Dating a client.


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## prodriver (Jan 27, 2014)

sokillme said:


> Dating a client.


Ive known her for 5 years now and she wont say anything but according to what I have gathered greeks are touchy. They kiss and hug. So i might be taking this the wrong way round.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Spotthedeaddog (Sep 27, 2015)

prodriver said:


> Only thing is I don't wana lose both. This other woman is honestly best woman ive ever met. Thing is I dont want to end it then go in a mess if the other one doesnt think of me in that way.
> 
> With improvement, I have tried alot of things to make it work.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


If she ios the best then stop being an <rephrase>unpleasant man</> and playing with other peoples feelings. A light flirt might be ok, but you don't seem to know where to draw the line, and you need to personally defend your heart if you give it so easily.

If you can't do that, give away the wonder one so others may show her the honor that you can't. (and then stop being a richard)


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## prodriver (Jan 27, 2014)

spotthedeaddog said:


> If she ios the best then stop being an <rephrase>unpleasant man</> and playing with other peoples feelings. A light flirt might be ok, but you don't seem to know where to draw the line, and you need to personally defend your heart if you give it so easily.
> 
> If you can't do that, give away the wonder one so others may show her the honor that you can't. (and then stop being a richard)



I like this advice thanks. Best one so far. You are definitely correct saying not to give heart away easily when i am doing. I can't stop thinking about her and that needs to stop.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

prodriver said:


> Ive known her for 5 years now and she wont say anything but according to what I have gathered greeks are touchy. They kiss and hug. So i might be taking this the wrong way round.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_




Ask her out and if she says yes, divorce your wife. If she says no, find another client.


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## prodriver (Jan 27, 2014)

But honestly does it sound like she likes me or doesnt? Shes only just started doing this the moment I got her a necklace
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

prodriver said:


> But honestly does it sound like she likes me or doesnt? Shes only just started doing this the moment I got her a necklace
> _Posted via Mobile Device_




This isn't junior high. If you like her ask her for coffee. It's that simple.


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## prodriver (Jan 27, 2014)

blueinbr said:


> This isn't junior high. If you like her ask her for coffee. It's that simple.


I did ask and we did go for a meal. 

Im still not sure if she sees me in that way. 

Im gonna take her for a full day out (she agreed). 

Then im going to ask her.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Hopeful Cynic (Apr 27, 2014)

prodriver said:


> But honestly does it sound like she likes me or doesnt? Shes only just started doing this the moment I got her a necklace


Nope. She has nothing but contempt for you. She is using you. She knows you're an ******* who would cheat on his wife. She knows you're willing to buy her jewelry and meals, etc, and all she has to do is kiss you on the cheek which is completely normal in her culture.

She has you wrapped up around her little finger, which she can easily do because you told her how unhappy your marriage is.

This infatuation with a client simply demonstrates that your marriage is on the rocks and something needs to be done. You have two paths to decide between.

You can work to improve your marriage. Step one for that would be to dump this client as she'd be a terrible distraction.

Or you can end your marriage. Once the dust has settled and your children are stable again, then you can pursue this client. And probably get your heart broken.

All you are doing is the classic cheater behaviour of being unwilling to leave one comfort zone until you know you have another one lined up. Treat your wife with respect like a human being instead of abusing her while you establish another comfort zone.

Also, this client is not going to be a comfort zone.


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

prodriver said:


> I did ask and we did go for a meal.
> 
> 
> 
> ...




Come back then. We will be here.


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