# Strictly oral



## Giveitup (Mar 8, 2016)

Don't get me wrong, I love receiving oral. But the problem is, is that it is the only sex my wife & I have. I do the wine and dine her. I do all the things she asks of me. I am her handyman. Wash dishes, cloths, etc. but when it all finally gets to the point of having a sexual night in bed with her, it always ends up with her giving me a blow job. Then she is done. I try & try, to continue so that I can play with her, & give her some pleasure. the only time I get to see her naked is when gets out of the shower. That's for 2 minutes then she's dressed. Any suggestions what might be going on here? When I ask her why she only gives me a BJ, all I get is " I like doing it for you ". I tell her I need more then just a BJ all the time. The answer, " next time ". This has been going on about 2 years now.


----------



## GraceG676 (Dec 16, 2015)

Giveitup said:


> Don't get me wrong, I love receiving oral. But the problem is, is that it is the only sex my wife & I have. I do the wine and dine her. I do all the things she asks of me. I am her handyman. Wash dishes, cloths, etc. but when it all finally gets to the point of having a sexual night in bed with her, it always ends up with her giving me a blow job. Then she is done. I try & try, to continue so that I can play with her, & give her some pleasure. the only time I get to see her naked is when gets out of the shower. That's for 2 minutes then she's dressed. Any suggestions what might be going on here? When I ask her why she only gives me a BJ, all I get is " I like doing it for you ". I tell her I need more then just a BJ all the time. The answer, " next time ". This has been going on about 2 years now.



Have you tried anything romantic? Have you tried making a reservation in a hotel if you guys have kids ask someone for help. Do you think she's cheating on you. Or have a serious talk. 2 years is alot if that's the only thing your getting. Is she ashamed of her body.


----------



## Giveitup (Mar 8, 2016)

Thanks, no kids, as for her body, she is working on improving it, but under the sheets in the dark, I can't see anything. We have been on trips where only we 2 are alone. As for cheating on me, I haven't seen any evidence.


----------



## Yeswecan (Jul 25, 2014)

Giveitup said:


> Don't get me wrong, I love receiving oral. But the problem is, is that it is the only sex my wife & I have. I do the wine and dine her. I do all the things she asks of me. I am her handyman. Wash dishes, cloths, etc. but when it all finally gets to the point of having a sexual night in bed with her, it always ends up with her giving me a blow job. Then she is done. I try & try, to continue so that I can play with her, & give her some pleasure. the only time I get to see her naked is when gets out of the shower. That's for 2 minutes then she's dressed. Any suggestions what might be going on here? When I ask her why she only gives me a BJ, all I get is " I like doing it for you ". I tell her I need more then just a BJ all the time. The answer, " next time ". This has been going on about 2 years now.


Self esteem issue with her body?

My W does not like the way she looks. Asks me to take my glasses off when she it naked.


----------



## TheTruthHurts (Oct 1, 2015)

Same for me for years. W had issues during childbirth so PIV was a problem. Wasn't comfortable for her.

I finally asserted myself mute more and got "his needs her needs" and have tried a ton of different things to communicate better.

Many women really don't get men's need for sex. It is often really about intimacy for men but it's mistaken as purely a sex act.

Read that book and then read it with her. It can serve as a way to talk about your need for physical closeness that the BJ doesn't provide.

The other thing is she probably has huge self esteem and body issues. I think my W is amazingly hot but she didn't see this and wore clothes that were loose fiting and conservative. But the real issue was a lack of confidence.

So I became much more aggressive - rolled on top of her and told her how beautiful she is to be and how sexy she is too. The contact wasn't sexual in nature but for closeness and to connect. I stepped up my praise of her 10 fold. It's taken about a year but now she dresses nicer (I specifically asked her to buy herself nicer outfits), even wears yoga pants, is happier with herself and more confident. So I am just saying let her know how awesome she is and eventually she'll start to believe it.

Btw re the PIV - maybe your big for her and it hurts. I wouldn't have believed it but it was true. We tried all types of lubes till we found something that didn't irritate her. Also longer foreplay and more gentle and shorter time periods. It has helped immensely.

Good luck


----------



## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

Wait, so your wife has been giving you blow jobs, and only blow jobs for two years and she says she doesn't want anything more?

Well now this is a new one for me!

Your wife is working on her weight but you don't think that her negative body image has anything to do with her refusal? Just how over weight is she? Was she always over weight? Did she grow up as an over weight kid and blossom into a very over weight woman? Does she diet often? Are other members of her family over weight?

Have you tried telling her you don't want a blow job and instead want to touch her?

Have you two ever had sex? Did she seem to enjoy it? Are you really really sure? Cause women fake it a lot!

Have you tried getting her to stop blowing you before you ejacukate so that you can move on to something that might bring her an orgasm?

I'm just havin a super hard time wrapping my brain around this. Two years of blow jobs only and she pretends to be happy with that? Not buying it.


----------



## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

How long married?

How long together?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

Did she ever like PIV intercourse? If so when did that stop? 

Is it possible she may be hiding a discovery like an std or something from you? What would happen if you initiated sex and took control to do PIV sex? Would she reject you?


----------



## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

This cannot be real.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## GuyInColorado (Dec 26, 2015)

I'd get a girl on the side to slide it in and keep the wife for BJs. Win! 

Yes, I'm fcking serious!


----------



## 2ndchanceGuy (Sep 28, 2015)

She must be afraid of getting pregnant ??


----------



## *Deidre* (Feb 7, 2016)

Maybe PIV sex hurts? If it hurts, then she won't be interested. Maybe just ask her if it hurts.


----------



## Kilgoretrout (Feb 2, 2016)

Anon Pink said:


> Wait, so your wife has been giving you blow jobs, and only blow jobs for two years and she says she doesn't want anything more?
> 
> Well now this is a new one for me!
> 
> ...


Yeah this is man bites dog stuff. Maybe focus on making her feel beautiful and desirable and see if that helps
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Kilgoretrout (Feb 2, 2016)

*Deidre* said:


> Maybe PIV sex hurts? If it hurts, then she won't be interested. Maybe just ask her if it hurts.


There must be a way to make it work. To make her more comfortable
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## *Deidre* (Feb 7, 2016)

GuyInColorado said:


> I'd get a girl on the side to slide it in and keep the wife for BJs. Win!
> 
> Yes, I'm fcking serious!


Well after he 'wins,' then she'll 'win' ...in divorce court.


----------



## TheTruthHurts (Oct 1, 2015)

ConanHub said:


> This cannot be real.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Why? That was my situation for years. We used toys for the W but she loves BJs - go figure.


----------



## Young at Heart (Jan 6, 2015)

Giveitup said:


> Don't get me wrong, I love receiving oral. But the problem is, is that it is the only sex my wife & I have.
> 
> .......Any suggestions what might be going on here? When I ask her why she only gives me a BJ, all I get is " I like doing it for you ". I tell her I need more then just a BJ all the time. The answer, " next time ". This has been going on about 2 years now.


First of all, count your blessings, you could be one of the guys posting that his wife never has any kind of sex with him.

Yes, something is going on. Therapy would probably help. However, she is expressing love and a good attitude when she says "I like doing it for you." 

Good luck.


----------



## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

TheTruthHurts said:


> Why? That was my situation for years. We used toys for the W but she loves BJs - go figure.


Apparently you were aware your wife had a medical issue.

This guy hasn't nailed his woman in two years or seen her naked and doesn't know why.

I also would never go that long. Not even close.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## TheTruthHurts (Oct 1, 2015)

Sorry I assumed your W was getting off other ways at least some of the time. Is she? Do you guys use toys?


----------



## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

TheTruthHurts said:


> Sorry I assumed your W was getting off other ways at least some of the time. Is she? Do you guys use toys?


She won't go there. We just use our bodies. I don't mind but I love PIV.

I won't go one session without it. 

Medical issues are the only exception and I would bend space to get her healthy in that department.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

TheTruthHurts said:


> Sorry I assumed your W was getting off other ways at least some of the time. Is she? Do you guys use toys?


Whoops! Sorry! I think you were asking OP.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Vinnydee (Jan 4, 2016)

I have not had intercourse for longer than my wife and I can remember. I know the reason though. It is a complicated story with many psychological issues combined with other factors, but the long and short of it is that my wife is bisexual and prefers sex without penetration like the sex she has with her girlfriend.


----------



## D1C (Aug 29, 2015)

Vinnydee said:


> I have not had intercourse for longer than my wife and I can remember. I know the reason though. It is a complicated story with many psychological issues combined with other factors, but the long and short of it is that my wife is bisexual and prefers sex without penetration like the sex she has with her girlfriend.


Id be out the door so fast....


----------



## TheTruthHurts (Oct 1, 2015)

Vinnydee said:


> I have not had intercourse for longer than my wife and I can remember. I know the reason though. It is a complicated story with many psychological issues combined with other factors, but the long and short of it is that my wife is bisexual and prefers sex without penetration like the sex she has with her girlfriend.


I completely understand and frankly sexuality is a very personal thing. Women more often than not cum from clitoral stimulation. Once a man truly understands that he will do what it takes to provide the best sexual experience for his lover / wife (that's for you vinnie  ). So I buy lots of toys and we have lots of fun. I just bought a glass dildo and at Christmas I bought a magic wand rechargeable though that's kind of powerful. Anyway you have to provide your spouse what they most enjoy. And believe me I get what I need every day. So give whatever your spouse needs regardless of your preferences or biases.


----------

