# From SI Things Every Wayward Spouse Need To Know



## No Longer Lonely Husband (Nov 3, 2015)

https://www.loveshack.org/forums/ro...365269-things-every-wayward-spouse-needs-know


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

I would just go through the two D's.

Disgust and divorce.

You doing ok mate?


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## UpsideDownWorld11 (Feb 14, 2018)

It seems like a losing game to me. That trust and respect (for both sides) will never be the same.

I found a better spouse in the time it would have taken me (according to the 'experts') to recover from infidelity and regain a shred of my former marriage.

There are so many better options out there. Why limit yourself to a flawed one.


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## GoldenR (Jan 6, 2019)

Here's the list my XWW needed to know: 

1 - don't come home


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## StarFires (Feb 27, 2018)

GoldenR said:


> Here's the list my XWW needed to know:
> 
> 1 - don't come home


Oh that is just so perfect.


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## StarFires (Feb 27, 2018)

Seriously, I couldn't live through trying to read all of that. If anybody gave THAT kind of darn, they wouldn't cheat in the first place.


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## attheend02 (Jan 8, 2019)

StarFires said:


> Seriously, I couldn't live through trying to read all of that. If anybody gave THAT kind of darn, they wouldn't cheat in the first place.


That's what I quickly realized with my WW. 

I would have had to coerce her out of her fog just to be continuously second guessing for the rest of life.


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

UpsideDownWorld11 said:


> It seems like a losing game to me. That trust and respect (for both sides) will never be the same.
> 
> I found a better spouse in the time it would have taken me (according to the 'experts') to recover from infidelity and regain a shred of my former marriage.
> 
> There are so many better options out there. Why limit yourself to a flawed one.



In his 'Married Man Sex Life' material, Athol Kay uses the term, "it is easier to give birth than it is to resurrect the dead" to describe that concept.


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## No Longer Lonely Husband (Nov 3, 2015)

ConanHub said:


> I would just go through the two D's.
> 
> Disgust and divorce.
> 
> You doing ok mate?


Doing fantastic Conan. Life is good. Marriage is doing GREAT! Working less living more. Wife and I flew to our new place in south Florida for the new year and just returned home Thursday after almost three weeks. Had a blast with two couples staying with us on alternate weeks.

Posted this from other site as it is pretty good read for a wayward in my humble jarhead opinion. I know most on here lean towards d, but Christmas Eve as three years of R. Glad I chose this route. Was not easy at first as I dealt my my issues simultaneously while wife was in IC and we were in MC. Took about two years to feel complete again, but it was short term pain for long term gain.




Peace


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## Mr.Married (Feb 21, 2018)

He's a Marine .... tough is his way.


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## snerg (Apr 10, 2013)

GoldenR said:


> Here's the list my XWW needed to know:
> 
> 1 - don't come home


This truly is the most simple and efficient solution.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

That's an interesting piece.

Incidentally, I never told *anyone* about my wife's affair. Not a single soul.


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## She'sStillGotIt (Jul 30, 2016)

StarFires said:


> Seriously, I couldn't live through trying to read all of that. If anybody gave THAT kind of darn, they wouldn't cheat in the first place.


Yup.

I took one look at that massive hot mess over on LoveShack and shut it right down. Most WS's will put on some kind of act to keep in the good graces of their BS, but they're NOT going to turn into the Saint this silly article implies they need to be. Good luck with THAT.

GoldenR has the right idea - you just need a list of ONE item, and that's "don't come home."

Done.


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## StillSearching (Feb 8, 2013)

MattMatt said:


> That's an interesting piece.
> 
> Incidentally, I never told *anyone* about my wife's affair. Not a single soul.


I know now!


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## TJW (Mar 20, 2012)

snerg said:


> (don't come home) This truly is the most simple and efficient solution.


Seriously.

If you disrespect and despise your spouse enough that you can give yourself permission to commit adultery....if you are so indifferent to his/her emotional well-being as to allow yourself to feel good at his/her expense.....

then, please, be honorable for once......, get out, take nothing, allow liberal visitation, support yourself TOTALLY with no alimony, take half the typical child-support if you are the custodial parent, become the best co-parent you can be, and let him/her go to salvage whatever he/she can of the rest of his/her life.

If you think that somehow he/she will "get over it", "forgive and forget"..... you are in complete delusion. While he/she may indeed, in time (lots of time) forgive what you did, the scars you placed on his/her psyche will never disappear. It's quite like having someone cut your arm off..... you may, in time, no longer seek retribution, and no longer wish any harm to your maimer..... but, you will live your life with only one arm.


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