# Unforgivable acts?



## Miss Honey (Sep 26, 2014)

What acts would you be unable to forgive your partner for?


----------



## larry.gray (Feb 21, 2011)

You don't know until you've been there. You simply can't understand until you're starring it in the face.

Something not on the list but certainly not forgivable: Molesting kids. Not too much of a worry for men to think their wife might do that. But not so for women. A relative discovered her husband was doing that. Rather than face jail he blew his head off. Made an effed up situation even more effed up.


----------



## Holland (Aug 20, 2012)

I voted for all of them except the last one. Zero tolerance for immoral behaviour here especially infidelity either EA or PA.

The only one that would be flexible is a criminal offence as it would depend on what it was. If it were violence of any kind then no, if it were traffic offenses then that is not a big deal.

There are enough good men out there to waste time on a bad one.


----------



## nikoled (Mar 12, 2014)

I am 6 months post dday of my husbands EA. I never thought I would forgive an affair. I'm not forgiving his, but we are in reconciliation and I think are going to make it. I don't FORGIVE it per se- more I am accepting that it happened and choosing to move forward with my husband. It is now VERY clear, however, that if he ever cheats again I will be done, however. So, I guess I now do know that I would not tolerate an EA or PA. I also would not tolerate domestic violence or big secrets at this point. Maybe at one point I would have- not again.


----------



## The Middleman (Apr 30, 2012)

A physical infidelity


----------



## Forest (Mar 29, 2014)

Now the follow up question should be as to whether of not you'd actually end the relationship due to an "unforgivable act".

Can you have an unforgivable act, yet continue on?


----------



## Thundarr (Jul 4, 2012)

Depends on the person who betrayed me and the surrounding factors. I divorced my ex for cheating but she wasn't the remorseful heavy lifting wayward type.

-Sexual Infidelity
Most likely would be divorce but maybe not.

-Emotional Infidelity
Sooner than I would PA but it would be tough.

-Domestic Violence
I'd forgive once. Not twice though.

-Criminal Offense
Sure depending on the offense. 

-Undisclosed past (previous partners, previous children)
Depends. Small omissions meh. Medium omissions would be disappointing. Flat out deception of character would be a problem and large omissions like previous kids I would not forgive.

-Hidden bad habits (gambling, financial lying)
Depends on how bad or how destructive.

-There's nothing I wouldn't forgive.
Honestly there's not a whole lot I'm not capable of forgiving but it would take a pretty special effort to make amends and changes for a few things.


----------



## commonsenseisn't (Aug 13, 2014)

Because of spiritual values I have, I feel I am obligated to forgive all things. (I'm not capable of it yet, but practice makes perfect I guess.)

I would still divorce for physical infidelity and a few other things, plus there would be no chance of reconciliation later. Just because I choose to forgive does not mean I will continue to allow someone the opportunity to harm me. 

The context of many offenses would be important to my decision. 

I would like to think I'm a believer in forgiveness and reconciliation, but there's a limit.


----------



## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

There's not much that I can't forgive. Having said that, I'll also say this...

Forgiveness and divorce are NOT mutually exclusive.


----------



## Q tip (Apr 15, 2014)

Dutch Ovens weren't covered. What's wrong with this world.


----------



## Kvothe_The_Raven (Apr 6, 2014)

Not seemingly being "there" emotionally during possible pregnancy - this is what I've been told is unforgivable in my relationship and has destroyed all the trust. It may not seem all that much in comparison to the list above, but to my partner it was shattered the bedrock of our relationship. So, to different people there are different values that are important to them.. and not appreciating that was the lesson I learned.


----------



## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

Holland said:


> I voted for all of them except the last one. Zero tolerance for immoral behaviour here especially infidelity either EA or PA.
> 
> The only one that would be flexible is a criminal offence as it would depend on what it was. If it were violence of any kind then no, if it were traffic offenses then that is not a big deal.
> 
> There are enough good men out there to waste time on a bad one.


:iagree:

Except I feel that way about women

Plenty of good women out there and won't waste my time with any of that nonsense anymore. Voted for every one except the last one


----------



## Gabriel (May 10, 2011)

Forest said:


> Now the follow up question should be as to whether of not you'd actually end the relationship due to an "unforgivable act".
> 
> Can you have an unforgivable act, yet continue on?


Interesting concept. This would also imply that you are willing to stay with someone while forever begrudging them of something they've done.

That would be tough. 

Gus's comment on the other hand, I think (tell me if I'm wrong Gus), goes the other way and says that you probably could forgive someone AND leave them.


----------



## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

Nothing on that list I wouldn't forgive a partner for, but I'd still end the relationship with them (even marriage) for most of those reasons. Forgiveness is about the forgiver not the perpetrator.


----------



## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

GusPolinski said:


> There's not much that I can't forgive. Having said that, I'll also say this...
> 
> Forgiveness and divorce are NOT mutually exclusive.


Could not have said it better.

I voted nothing that I could not forgive, that does not mean there are no repercussions.

Forgiveness is a matter of the heart, justice is needed in concert.


----------



## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

Gabriel said:


> Interesting concept. This would also imply that you are willing to stay with someone while forever begrudging them of something they've done.
> 
> That would be tough.
> 
> Gus's comment on the other hand, I think (tell me if I'm wrong Gus), goes the other way and says that you probably could forgive someone AND leave them.


Yep. You can forgive, and then divorce, or divorce, and then forgive, though I'd think that the latter is probably the more common of the two. Either way, it doesn't necessarily have to be one or the other.

Now... as far as my threshold for divorce? Well, having already forgiven an EA (two of them, actually), I'd have to say that another EA would be a deal-breaker. Obviously a PA would be as well. In fact, if either of the EAs had been a PA, I'd have opted for divorce instead of reconciliation.


----------



## Gabriel (May 10, 2011)

GusPolinski said:


> Yep. You can forgive, and then divorce, or divorce, and then forgive, though I'd think that the latter is probably the more common of the two. Either way, it doesn't necessarily have to be one or the other.
> 
> Now... as far as my threshold for divorce? Well, having already forgiven an EA (two of them, actually), I'd have to say that another EA would be a deal-breaker. Obviously a PA would be as well. In fact, if either of the EAs had been a PA, I'd have opted for divorce instead of reconciliation.


Agreed - if my wife's EA was also a PA, it would be over. If she dove into another EA, same result.

If she never had any infidelity and had a drunken ONS....I'd reserve judgment. That, in some ways, would have hurt less than a deep EA with love/feelings, etc.


----------



## Thundarr (Jul 4, 2012)

Forest said:


> Now the follow up question should be as to whether of not you'd actually end the relationship due to an "unforgivable act".
> 
> Can you have an unforgivable act, yet continue on?





Gabriel said:


> Interesting concept. This would also imply that you are willing to stay with someone while forever begrudging them of something they've done.
> 
> That would be tough.
> 
> Gus's comment on the other hand, I think (tell me if I'm wrong Gus), goes the other way and says that you probably could forgive someone AND leave them.


Depending on the betrayal it can take many revolutions of begrudging and forgiving, only to begrudge and forgive again. The wheel usually stops spinning eventually though.


----------



## 4x4 (Apr 15, 2014)

I voted Sexual Infidelity as the only 100% unforgivable.

I can can think of some depends and what-ifs on the other options.


----------



## Abc123wife (Sep 18, 2013)

GusPolinski said:


> Yep. You can forgive, and then divorce, or divorce, and then forgive, though I'd think that the latter is probably the more common of the two. Either way, it doesn't necessarily have to be one or the other.
> 
> Now... as far as my threshold for divorce? Well, having already forgiven an EA (two of them, actually), I'd have to say that another EA would be a deal-breaker. Obviously a PA would be as well. In fact, if either of the EAs had been a PA, I'd have opted for divorce instead of reconciliation.


I might see forgiving 1 EA, but 2? Why would she believe that a 3rd is the actual deal-breaker? Just curious.


----------



## 2ntnuf (Jul 14, 2012)

Steven Seagal in anything...Hey, just kidding Steve.


----------



## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

Miss Honey said:


> What acts would you be unable to forgive your partner for?


Gossip, Lying, Disloyalty.


----------



## Thundarr (Jul 4, 2012)

2ntnuf said:


> Steven Seagal in anything...Hey, just kidding Steve.


Hard to kill was awesome. Of course that was 25 years ago and Kelly LeBrock was in it (my what 25 years can do).


----------



## 2ntnuf (Jul 14, 2012)

Thundarr said:


> Hard to kill was awesome. Of course that was 25 years ago and Kelly LeBrock was in it (my what 25 years can do).


I remember her. Who was he?  Actually, I forgot about her. She was hawt. oh baby......


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

I can forgive almost anything given the right circumstances. 

But forgiving does not mean that the marriage can continue. That's a completely different thing. Each situation is different.


----------



## Cynthia (Jan 31, 2014)

Forgiving is not the same as tolerating or putting up with something. I forgive, but that doesn't mean I have to stay in the relationship or forgo justice.


----------



## Rugs (Apr 12, 2013)

I'm not a forgiver. I never have been. 

My sister took me to a psychic for my 40th birthday and the lady told me I was put here in this life to work on forgiveness. 

I thought the lady was hokey but she was onto something because I expect the impossible from human beings who are never flawless. 

Once the line has been crossed, I can't think of anyone I've forgiven.


----------



## Q tip (Apr 15, 2014)

Understanding does not justify the act.


----------



## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

Gabriel said:


> Agreed - if my wife's EA was also a PA, it would be over. If she dove into another EA, same result.
> 
> *If she never had any infidelity and had a drunken ONS....I'd reserve judgment.* That, in some ways, would have hurt less than a deep EA with love/feelings, etc.


Hmm... it _might_ hurt less, but the bottom line (for me, at least) is that *she'd have knowingly put herself into a situation where that was somewhat likely to happen.*


----------



## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

Abc123wife said:


> I might see forgiving 1 EA, but 2? Why would she believe that a 3rd is the actual deal-breaker? Just curious.


I didn't find out about the 2nd until about a week-and-a-half after I caught her in the first. At that point, I'd already committed to reconciliation, and I felt that she was being truthful (at last!), so I decided to keep pushing. Plus I bluffed the f*ck out of her and led her to believe that I could get every text, pic, and e-mail that she'd ever sent w/ a cell phone... and she totally bought it.

Plus... I wasn't the best of husbands. I'll admit that. I've never been physically or verbally abusive w/ her, but there was a lot of neglect. It was never done maliciously, but it happened nonetheless. _Or, rather, *I DID IT* nonetheless._

Believe me, though... I get what you're saying. But you'll just have to trust me when I tell you... she now knows beyond a shadow of all doubt that another affair would mean the immediate and permanent end of our marriage.


----------



## Miss Taken (Aug 18, 2012)

Until it (whatever *it* is) happens to you, anything you say is just speculation.

I never thought I'd forgive infidelity. I always said if he cheated I'd kick him out the door...and I did for a year but here we are again.


----------



## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

Miss Taken said:


> Until it (whatever *it* is) happens to you, anything you say is just speculation.
> 
> I never thought I'd forgive infidelity. I always said if he cheated I'd kick him out the door...and I did for a year but here we are again.


Guess it depends on the person and how badly you want to make things "work". In my marriage infidelity was an absolute deal breaker and we divorced over it. Some of the other things on that list I would have worked with at that time. I only had that one boundary on her and none on myself.

Now making it works takes on a whole other Concept to me. I don't worry about holding accountable the boundarys I place on my GF. What I do hold firm to is the boundarys I place on myself. I won't be with a cheater, I won't be with an abuser, I wont be with someone who won't communicate about their past and so on. Once you take the burden off what you want them to do and place it firmly on yourself and say this is how I am going to live its way easier to hold yourself to. Least that's how I work And it has made things easier to not over think things.


----------



## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good evening all
I think there are a lot of fuzzy boundaries and mitigating circumstances. 

Personally I don't think I could forgive an intentional and planned attempt to hurt me. I could forgive almost anything else if it were repented.

By "hurt me" I mean an act intentionally designed to cause me harm, not an act which happens to cause me harm as a side-effect - something I have forgiven many times already.


----------



## Gabriel (May 10, 2011)

GusPolinski said:


> Hmm... it _might_ hurt less, but the bottom line (for me, at least) is that *she'd have knowingly put herself into a situation where that was somewhat likely to happen.*


I can see that. I can also see how easy it would be, especially for women. Go out with friends, have a couple too many, dance in a crowd, inhibitions fall to the wayside, quickie in the car before you're even thinking.

Not to say it's okay - just that I could potentially see myself forgiving that depending on the circumstances. But only if it happened only once, and there was immediate regret/remorse.

IMO that's a less severe crime than months of secret texts, emails, phone calls, I love you's, and fully giving your heart to another person. 

My wife fully admitted she fell in love with the OM, who was a living breathing friend of hers for 20 years, and someone I considered a casual friend also. Way more painful IMO.

However, if she consummated that love with sex, I would not have ever forgiven her or even worked on R. I know for a fact they did not.


----------



## 2ntnuf (Jul 14, 2012)

for·give verb \fər-ˈgiv, fȯr-\
: to stop feeling anger toward (someone who has done something wrong) : to stop blaming (someone)

: to stop feeling anger about (something) : to forgive someone for (something wrong)

Forgive - Definition and More from the Free Merriam-Webster Dictionary


I think feelings are neither right nor wrong and I don't think we can turn them on or off like a switch. I think it takes some work to do that. We have to see some kind of sadness, remorse, or retribution. Sometimes all it takes is an apology. Sometimes it's a sincere apology. There is no right answer. Everyone is different. I think the person who offended wants to see forgiveness sooner than the victim in many cases. 

The part of the definition I disagree with is where it says stop blaming someone. Saying, "you did this or that and made me feel badly or messed this or that up", just seems like stating facts. Feelings can be expressed in many ways. Stopping the blame does not mean a person is not angry. I think we can call a murderer a murderer and not be angry when we do that. It may or may not be hurtful for them to hear that. If it's the truth, it's their burden to find peace with that truth, not mine to make them feel better. It's sort of like saying a wife should make a husband happy, or vice versa. No, I think we need to be happy and then we can find happiness with someone else who is happy.


----------



## OnlyQueen (Oct 19, 2013)

Nearly all of them except for the lying about a past partner or child. This would really depend on several factors:

Was it during our relationship/marriage or before we even met?
Were his previous past partners long-term gfs or random hook-ups/FWB thing?
What is the reason he hasn't visit his child?

If he used to sleep around in the past and the reason he hasn't visit his child is because he bailed out while the woman is suing him for child support then no I wouldn't forgive him.

If his previous partner was a nasty wife who not only took away his child but was awarded full custody while he's still fighting to get his child back (but just didn't want to hurt me with this information) then I would considered it.


----------



## allwillbewell (Dec 13, 2012)

Interesting discussion.

Always thought infidelity would be a deal breaker : it wasn't.
evidence of previous affair, ONS a deal breaker : it wasn't. 

Forgiving the LTAs of FWH? These are made up of a hundred minor and major behaviors, some of which I can forgive and some which I have not.

We are in a strong R with my still holding certain actions of his against him.

I see forgiveness as a process like peeling the layers of an onion. Not necessary to forgive all in one great epiphany. As FWH is able to open up and discuss his behavior and motivations AND apologise, I will consider forgiving him for that harm...but I need him to understand what each act he so carelessly committed did to me first. He needs to be held accountable : a very long process of many years but I am OK eith that.


----------



## EnjoliWoman (Jul 2, 2012)

I would find the deception a bigger issue than the act itself. I've never been cheated on (that I'm aware of) but right now I lean toward not forgiving PA or EA nor reconciling. DV is an absolute unforgivable event. It happened in my first marriage and yelling, threats, violent outbursts or hitting just won't be tolerated. Life is too short to walk on any more eggshells. I'd rather be alone.

Undisclosed partners isn't a huge deal by itself but there certainly are some dealbreakers. Children that were never acknowledged would speak to his character - to walk away even as a young man and abandon a child would forever change my respect for him. UNLESS he confided this to me and was distraught at his choice and wanted my support in finding that child. If the child came looking for him, I'd have more of an issue with it - it would bother me that it never bothered him. Having had sex with a prostitute would make me feel icky about him. If we had a friend that I later found out he had sex with, I would have trust issues - I expect transparency. The specific situation isn't what would be unforgivable but rather the way in which it was handled would diminish my respect and therefore love and would likely result in a breakdown of the relationship.

Hidden bad habits - depends on the destructive nature. I would be more worried about the "hidden" part. If I found out he smoked cigarettes on occasion when out with "the guys" and lied about it when I smelled it, not a huge deal but odd that he felt he couldn't just fess up. The lack of communication and trust would bother me more. Buying lottery tickets every week when he knows I think it's silly isn't a big deal but still I would be concerned that he felt he had to hide it. Hiding credit cards, gambling debts, taking out a loan to cover them, etc. all huge and unforgivable. Taking a long shot for a high return on an IPA or other investment really just a trust issue. I'd be more concerned that he thought I wouldn't be supportive and then went behind my back. I'd be mad about the huge loss, especially if it were devastating, but mostly it would be the hiding and the fact he didn't respect my opinion.

Criminal offense is the one that has the most wiggle room. DUI? Totally irresponsible but as long as he didn't have a drinking problem and it was a single event that didn't result in injuries to anyone, I could forgive. Assault because he punched a guy? Depends on why. Anything very violent or greedy AND premeditated or manipulative would completely change my opinion of him.


----------



## jaquen (Mar 1, 2012)

There are no unforgivable acts. I believe forgiveness is something I must always find my way to, regardless.

But if you mean what acts would destroy my marriage? It would be nearly impossible for me to continue being married after a PA.

And disrespect. I will not stand to be chronically, blatantly, purposefully disrespected.


----------



## firebelly1 (Jul 9, 2013)

2ntnuf said:


> for·give verb \fər-ˈgiv, fȯr-\
> : to stop feeling anger toward (someone who has done something wrong) : to stop blaming (someone)
> 
> : to stop feeling anger about (something) : to forgive someone for (something wrong)


When I answered the question I was equating forgiveness with staying in the relationship. But Gus brought up the good point that there is a difference. I am not religious, so don't feel a religious imperative to forgive, and I don't feel I have a moral obligation to forgive either. I've heard forgiveness is for ourselves and I would want to forgive for that reason - holding on to anger isn't good for my mental health.

If forgiveness means to stop feeling anger toward someone for something, it seems that I could do that with everything on the list, but it doesn't necessarily mean I would stay in the relationship. I WOULD continue blaming since blame is just a fact. They did it.

The one thing on the list that I would immediately leave a relationship for is domestic violence. If someone raised a hand to me or my kids I would have to assume they would keep doing it. Sexual abuse of me or my kids is another thing - no tolerance. 

I could, under the right circumstances, stay in a relationship where everything else had occurred, without anger and resentment, given that the issue was entirely resolved and trust was reestablished.


----------



## jaquen (Mar 1, 2012)

Miss Taken said:


> Until it (whatever *it* is) happens to you, anything you say is just speculation.
> 
> I never thought I'd forgive infidelity. I always said if he cheated I'd kick him out the door...and I did for a year but here we are again.



Technically true, but give people a little credit in reasonably knowing their personal boundaries.

For example, Firebelly1 just said that sexually abusing her or her kids is an act that would result in the relationship ending. I think she knows, beyond reasonable doubt, that this is the sure outcome of such actions.

For some people infidelity is that sure action. They will never, ever be with somebody who was unfaithful and they don't need to experience the foul breath of infidelity in order to find out.


----------



## 2ntnuf (Jul 14, 2012)

firebelly1 said:


> When I answered the question I was equating forgiveness with staying in the relationship. But Gus brought up the good point that there is a difference. I am not religious, so don't feel a religious imperative to forgive, and I don't feel I have a moral obligation to forgive either. I've heard forgiveness is for ourselves and I would want to forgive for that reason - holding on to anger isn't good for my mental health.
> 
> If forgiveness means to stop feeling anger toward someone for something, it seems that I could do that with everything on the list, but it doesn't necessarily mean I would stay in the relationship. I WOULD continue blaming since blame is just a fact. They did it.
> 
> ...


Well, I'm struggling with forgiveness and it's meaning. I posted the definition because I thought it might be of some help to understand what we are talking about. 

I think it is helpful to talk about what occurred. I think it can be healing under the right circumstances and supervision. I think it can easily be considered blaming. 

I am not judging nor am I trying to "throw anyone off"(confuse/trick). Part of the other reason I posted the definition was to bolster and explain my personal position on forgiveness. Believe me, I struggle very much with forgiveness. I want to forgive, but feel that it is difficult if not impossible, without some kind of apology and a little remorse on or from all parties involved. It's like the scales have to be calibrated.

And, I think I understand that there are certain things you have which may be the same and also different from others, that will be forgiven. Feelings are neither right nor wrong. Again, I have no right to judge. I have made my own mistakes in life. Some of which, I pay for until the end of my days. 

Some things are believed to have been done by me and are not true. Some things I have heard whispers of, but have no knowledge of doing. It's really tough when you must accept guilt for things of which you had no part in, but are considered guilty of anyway. 

It doesn't matter. It's those things in particular, that cause me the most difficulty in forgiving and moving forward. It's those things that have caused me the most emotional harm. I believe you cannot prove a negative. 

Please don't think I have said anything in that post in relation to anyone here. Sometimes I read something posted and own it. I usually find out I am mistaken. Unless someone quotes me or sends me a pm, I have to consider that we all have our own "stuff" going on inside. 

I don't even know any of you personally. I don't know your real names. I don't care to know your business, only what you decide to share, that is, if I even see it.

I did like richardsharpe's post(by the way, love the username), which I quoted below. I think he has captured much of what I feel inside at this time. I wish it wren't so. 



richardsharpe said:


> Good evening all
> I think there are a lot of fuzzy boundaries and mitigating circumstances.
> 
> Personally I don't think I could forgive an intentional and planned attempt to hurt me. I could forgive almost anything else if it were repented.
> ...





2ntnuf said:


> for·give verb \fər-ˈgiv, fȯr-\
> : to stop feeling anger toward (someone who has done something wrong) : to stop blaming (someone)
> 
> : to stop feeling anger about (something) : to forgive someone for (something wrong)
> ...


I don't have the answers firebelly. I wish I did. I'd share them with everyone hurting. I don't understand all of it either. I'm just trying to muddle through like everyone else. If you knew me personally, you'd take what I write with a grain of salt, like I try to do with everyone else. I fail sometimes. I'm human too. I'm still learning and I'm 52.


----------



## EnjoliWoman (Jul 2, 2012)

While I understand the definitions and I understand the concept that forgiveness is for the offended more than the offender, I'm not sure it is always required to be at peace with something and move on.

For instance, the pain my ex caused me and my daughter with his alienation tactics. I know due to his personality disorder and all of my research he may not be able to understand or empathize with the hurt he caused either of us. He was probably sure he was steering her in the right direction and likely can't acknowledge it wasn't in her best interest. (There are some conflicting view on NPD in the psych arena.) 

I can't forgive or forget what he did - the things he said about me, the lies he told her, the way he tried to manipulate the system, the $40K in legal expenses he cost me that I'm still paying back. 

BUT I can acknowledge that I won't ever get an apology and that he will never comprehend the error of his ways. I can move forward and gradually leave it behind me. I say gradually because until she's 18 I am still on guard, but each year since that time it becomes less significant and I think about it less and less and I think about it with less emotion when I do think about it. Now it's just something that happened in the past.

Whether one forgives or not, to me it's more of being able to put it in the past and leave it there, whatever it is. I have difficulty comprehending giving forgiveness that isn't requested. It's like giving a gift that is refused. You're still holding the gift. What do you do with it? Just leave it there unwanted? Just because you gave it doesn't mean it was received. Does it make me feel better to have given something? Do I feel like a better person for taking that high road? I used to think so. I'm not so sure anymore.

If the best revenge is living well, I think perhaps the best forgiveness is that which isn't required. Not because an injustice didn't occur, but because you no longer even feel the sting of hurt therefore forgiveness is moot. To me that is even better - the parallel to the best revenge of living well is not even remembering the hurt, much less the need to forgive someone who doesn't want it. 

Does that make sense to anyone else? I'm not sure I'm explaining it well. It just feels forcing forgiveness doesn't bring me peace but frustration. Whereas indifference gives me peace.


----------



## 2ntnuf (Jul 14, 2012)

Yes it does make some sense. I think once the scabs are no longer being picked from the wounds, and we can find happiness in other people and things in our lives, we can truly move forward. Until then, we must either deal with those wounds again and again, or find a way to understand that those people and their opinions just do not matter a lick any more and will never again. 

Once I wrote about pity. I think the road to forgiveness in some cases, is paved with pity.


----------



## Bridge (Dec 27, 2013)

I was dating a guy back in 2008. He had a lot of character flaws I would never tolerate now but being 20 I chalked them up to his deep, counter culture nature. I put up with cheating, jealousy issues, lies, drug abuse... 

About 9 months in he revealed he believed in doomsday 2012 and reptilian people and my love for him died on the spot. 

Believing in reptile people = unforgivable.


----------



## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

*Re: Re: Unforgivable acts?*



Bridge said:


> I was dating a guy back in 2008. He had a lot of character flaws I would never tolerate now but being 20 I chalked them up to his deep, counter culture nature. I put up with cheating, jealousy issues, lies, drug abuse...
> 
> About 9 months in he revealed he believed in doomsday 2012 and reptilian people and my love for him died on the spot.
> 
> Believing in reptile people = unforgivable.


My GF does too, which I don't personally, however I'm a sucker for Illuminati conspiracy theories.


----------

