# Can I afford to get married?



## spk14 (Oct 22, 2010)

I am currently single and am drawn to the conclusion that I do not make enough money to ever consider marriage. My current finances are:

Annual income before taxes: $55,000
Annual Income after taxes: $40,000
My annual living expenses: $15,000 (one bedroom apartment)
Annual disposable income and savings: $25,000

Every girl I have met over the past few years has extremely limited or no earning potential with a cost of living higher than mine. I've been told child care is over $10,000 annually. If I were to ever get married and have a kid and my wife could only make minimum wage at a part-time job, it would only be smart for her to stay at home to take care of a child and save the money that would have been spent on day care. Considering this, the costs of marriage are:

Income before taxes: $55,000
Income after taxes: $40,000
My annual living expenses: $15,000
Her annual living expenses: $20,000
Added annual expenses as a home buyer: $15,000
Annual costs of raising a child: $15,000
Annual disposable income and savings: -$25,000

If I get married, I will be $25,000 in the hole every year unless:

1. I increase my annual income by at least $25,000
2. She is able to earn that $25,000 plus child daycare costs

Should I be drawn to the conclusion that my annual salary is too low to ever consider marriage, or should I expect any potential wife to hold a job? Do most married men make at least $80,000 annually? From what I recall, the average annual income for a peson in Texas is $40,000. Should I reconsider my career for one with more earning potential if I ever consider getting married?


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## 30Mom (Jan 21, 2012)

There is no right time to marry. There is also no right salary to indicate that you're ready for marriage. I read somewhere that less people are getting married because of the bad economy. You're ready to marry when you find the right person. Just don't spend a fortune or go into debt for the wedding. 

Honestly, I think you make enough. When my husband and I got married, we were both unemployed and had a child on the way. He eventually found a job and I got a great financial aid package for graduate school. We lived on less than 35,000 a year for 3 years. We made scarifices but never felt deprived in any way. We were creative for childcare, went to the museums on free days, and bought a single family home. We still managed to take family trips during the holidays and have a comfortable savings account. 

Now that i'm done with school and work full time, we are doing so much better financially but our lifestyle have not changed that much. Hope that helps.


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## spk14 (Oct 22, 2010)

Thanks for the reply. I feel more comfortable with numbers. According to my numbers, I'm putting myself in debt $25,000 per year at my current salary if I want to get married and have a kid. That means $100,000 debt in 4 years. That may very well mean having to sell our house and move into a crampt tiny apartment. Although $55,000 may be a measly salary by most people's standards, I feel I've worked too hard to live the rest of my life in poverty.

As of now, I am single and have no financial worries because of my low cost of living. If I lose my job for whatever reason, I know I have 4 years living expenses in the bank and will have no need to panic. 

Will I need to say good-bye to my sense of financial security if I ever get married? Is it common for the husband to pay 100% of the finances? Do many wives hold jobs that contribute to the family finances?

Are my estimates of raising a kid wrong? Are my expectations of a wife's ZERO earning potential wrong?


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Spk,

A bit more info about you could help.
How old are you? Do you have a college degree or some kind of trade school training that would lead to a career with a good possibility to your income going up significantly over time? Do you live in the USA? If not what country?

Like you I’m a lot more comfortable with numbers when it comes to issues like this.

When you are calculating what it costs to have a family, you need to consider the additional tax break for each person in your family. If you have a software program like Turbo Tax you can run different scenarios.. like how much of a tax break just a wife will make. How much of a tax break a child will make. If you earn $55K a year and have a wife and child you will pay significantly less in federal and state income taxes.

Some people will give me grief for this.. but seriously making sure that one’s family is financially fit is extremely important. You need not look for a woman who can bring in an income on her own right. 

Look for a woman how earns about what you do. To me it’s important that both of you have the ability to earn enough to support the family on your own if something happens, like one of you loses your job, one of you becomes too ill to work. Even one of you takes some time off work to be a stay-at-home parent, that person can get back into the work force easily once the children are in school.

More and more couples are defining their own financial model of who they fun their own family and finances. For example it is traditional for the man to the be the bread winner. But in my family I am the breadwinner and the wife takes care of the children and home. In many families both spouses work, share child care and house work evenly. This is something that you and your wife will need to work out. And it can/will be different at different times in your marriage as the two of you go through life.


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

I don't think marriage has much to do with money.
Are you trying to put a price tag on a woman?
Just any woman, shopping around in your price range?
What if there were some woman out there who made $300K a year and decided she couldn't afford you?
I think your perspective on this is very limited.
First of all, it's based on the assumption that a woman is going to be a static line in your balance sheet. Then you're assuming that your children are going to be healthy. And that you will be able to buy a house, prior to losing it of course. And that nobody will ever run a red light and smash into your car at an intersection and leave you in a coma for a few months and then permanently disabled afterwards. Unable to speak and eating through a tube. 
Also the assumption that someone would want to marry a guy who has such rigid plans.
This post has just left me with my jaw hanging open.
Please tell me this is not the way most men think about getting married? Women with ovaries have price tags on them?

I think EleGirl puts it more eloquently than me.
But really, as a woman I've had years of making 50K with barely working and 20K working my butt off at something I love...lifestyle has never taken a hit, always been there for my kids, including one who had a disability for a long while (and still has limitations).


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## spk14 (Oct 22, 2010)

I am 31 years old and have an MBA degree from a state university in finance with roughly five years professional experience. In my opinion, I have an impressive resume. Of course, when compared to hundreds of applicants in brutal competition for a job, it's not so hot. I wasn't lucky enough to graduate from high school at the age of seven and hit a home-run every day ever since. I would need a CPA license to enhance my earning potential.

Earning a CPA license would first require 60 hours in advanced accounting courses from a university. One of the more popular universities in my state is roughly $30,000 per year. Earning 60 hours would require 2 years at 15 hours per semester at $60,000 in tuition and fees. I would also have to quit my job to attend full time as the 3-hour commute every day would not be practical. Quitting my job and depleting my savings by $60,000 would be a real blow to my finances. This excludes the cost of applying for the CPA exam. Most people do not pass on the first try and require multiple attempts and consequently multiple exam fees. Obtaing a CPA license would be extremely expensive for me.

I think that if I wait for woman who has comparable earning potential as I (even at a measly 50k per year), I may be waiting for the rest of my life. Most women I meet who are in my age bracket are still living at home with their parents with no plan and not the slightest clue whatsoever regarding a future career of their own.

Whenever I meet a woman with a job, she almost always has a rock on her finger. In fact, every woman I meet who does not have serious problems in her life already has a rock on her finger. Most women I have met would have been completely dependent on me for all finances. 

Basd on the prior response, it sounds like this is abnormal and that I should expect to be able to find a woman who is willing and able to make more than minimum wage.


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## COGypsy (Aug 12, 2010)

I think that you may be making a few errors in your estimations. The first one I see is that you seem to be double counting a lot of living expenses. I'm assuming that you are including rent, food, utilities and car expenses in your estimation of living expenses, correct? If you are assuming that a potential spouse has higher living expenses, are you including those same items in that cost? If so, then you're including two rents, two full utilities, double groceries, etc. in that. In addition, if you're including an annual $15k additional expenses for home ownership in addition to the two rental line items, you're way overestimating. Basically it looks as though you've added in two full rents and a house payment when you would only be actually paying out one of those. Moreover, utilities wouldn't double across the board, only increase incrementally for an additional person and slightly larger space. In my house, the weeks that my husband is on call and not at home to eat, my grocery tab is about 75% of what it is when I shop for both of us. Two can't live as cheaply as one, but they can generally live for less than double the cost of one.

Your estimation for a child also looks as though you're assuming that your wife will not work, and yet the child will require full time day care. I'm guessing that the expenses for a child without day are would be about half or less what you're estimating.

I'd also point out that there are a lot of "living expenses" that are flexible. I know that if we ever had to live on just my husband's salary, there would be a huge difference in our grocery habits, grooming, clothing, etc. And frankly, a lot of them would be pretty painless changes, requiring more thought than anything else. 

As far as expectations for the financial contributions of each partner go, that's highly individual. I personally don't know ANY stay at home mom's. Almost every one of my female friends earns income that significantly contributes to the household coffers. I earn about the same as my husband, and know that's not uncommon for most of my friends. Others are in professional fields that don't hold the same earning potential as their spouses, but are a long, long way from minimum wage. It's important to remember too that income isn't static. Presumably, as experience, education and seniority kick in, wages increase as well. I've been promoted or changed jobs about every 2 - 3 years and it's never been for a new job that pays less, you know?

I think it's more about finding someone that shares your _values_ about money and homelife. If having someone stay at home with the kids is important, then you should be on the same page about spending, saving, lifestyle, etc. Regardless, those are important things to be in agreement about for a marriage, but once you start adding in kids and stuff, it becomes even more important.


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## FrankKissel (Nov 14, 2011)

Dude, I was earning half that when I got married (granted that was 15 years ago, but even accounting for inflation it was less). My wife made even less than I. We're both highly educated people who made the choice to enter rewarding, but not terribly well paying, career fields. 

Is there something about you that makes you uniquely incapable of attracting a mate with similar earning power and potential? Why are you only dating unemployed/underemployed women?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## spk14 (Oct 22, 2010)

Homemaker_Numero_Uno said:


> I don't think marriage has much to do with money.
> Are you trying to put a price tag on a woman?
> Just any woman, shopping around in your price range?
> What if there were some woman out there who made $300K a year and decided she couldn't afford you?
> ...


I just want to know if marriage means living the rest of my life in poverty. It's not that I will object to marrying the right girl even if it means living in poverty for the rest of my life, but I would like to at least know beforehand. As of right now, I'm single with no marriage plans.

How would you feel if you worked hard your entire life for a sense of financial security and then married a man with a cost of living so high and an earning potential so low that it meant you would have to move back in with your parents rather than having a place of your own with him? Not that you would object, but wouldn't you at least like to know?

I'm not putting a price tag on a woman. I just want to know if I'm a slacker who needs to reconsider his career before thinking about marriage. I want to survive, but I don't want to survive under a bridge. As of now, I'm able to pay my bills and add to savings with no problem as a bachelor. I hope to someday be a home owner.

I want to know if I have suitable finances to consider marriage or if I'll have to convince a future wife to live with me and my parents in their basement and have lunchables for dinner every night for the rest of our lives. Last time I checked, most women didn't like having lunchables for dinner. If that's the case, it's my job to get a second job or reconsider my career.


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

I think it might be best for you if you were single for a while longer, and instead of spending your time to get the CPA as you have a bad feeling about that, invest instead. I knew a guy who married a woman who earned measley money (according to your measures) and he took the wife's paycheck and invested it. When they had children, she stayed home with them and all fo those expenses were taken care of by the investment. It worked out wonderfully, especially since one of the children developed a psychiatric disability and the other one was gender exploratory and needed more clothes and hair salon visits and waxing than one would have expected.

I think with your savings and income you can afford some nice affairs, and there is no need to get married right now as it would be too angsty for you no matter what the woman was earning, you would worry about her getting pregnant or losing her job, and you'd scare her off before even getting down the aisle. 

You might start a business and hire from abroad. Then you have an employee who you can perhaps marry, and I have seen that work out as well.


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## FirstYearDown (Sep 15, 2011)

My husband lost his job soon after he proposed to me. It took him a year to find work and this was in 2008, when the recession hit full force.

We eloped because we could not afford a real wedding. We are finally leaving our small one bedroom apartment, after nearly four years of being here. I made those sacrifices because our love is priceless and I understood that money can come and go. 

If the love and work ethic is there, couples can work together to acheive financial goals. You are reducing marriage to strictly a financial proposition. 

My parents have lived in a four bedroom home and raised four children. When they met nearly forty years ago, all they could afford was a room and they had no car for years when they lived in the city we currently reside in.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

spk14 said:


> Basd on the prior response, it sounds like this is abnormal and that I should expect to be able to find a woman who is willing and able to make more than minimum wage.


I a woman who earns 6 figures as a software engineer. I work for a fortune 100 engineering firm. About half of the engineering staff is female.. most of them young. Many of them unmarried. Their starting salary right out of college is more than 50K. 

I don't know what city/state you live in, but there are a lot of well educated, well employed young women out there your age who have a problem meeting good men who actually have a good job and who want to get married.

The point is that you have to look for the women where the women are.

Where do you meet all of these women who only earn minimum wage? Where are you looking for women?


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## COGypsy (Aug 12, 2010)

spk14 said:


> I am 31 years old and have an MBA degree from a state university in finance with roughly five years professional experience. In my opinion, I have an impressive resume. Of course, when compared to hundreds of applicants in brutal competition for a job, it's not so hot. I wasn't lucky enough to graduate from high school at the age of seven and hit a home-run every day ever since. I would need a CPA license to enhance my earning potential.
> 
> Earning a CPA license would first require 60 hours in advanced accounting courses from a university. One of the more popular universities in my state is roughly $30,000 per year. Earning 60 hours would require 2 years at 15 hours per semester at $60,000 in tuition and fees. I would also have to quit my job to attend full time as the 3-hour commute every day would not be practical. Quitting my job and depleting my savings by $60,000 would be a real blow to my finances. This excludes the cost of applying for the CPA exam. Most people do not pass on the first try and require multiple attempts and consequently multiple exam fees. Obtaing a CPA license would be extremely expensive for me.
> 
> ...


Just out of curiosity, which part of Texas are you in? I'm having a hard time picturing too many places there where you'd be 3 hours from a university. My guess is South Texas somewhere, especially if the culture lends itself to people living at home until married--just a shot in the dark though. I grew up in El Paso, so I think I get a lot of what you're saying.

Also, I don't know what area of finance you're in, but have you looked at a CFP instead of a CPA? That can be pretty lucrative and doesn't come with the additional education requirement if you already have a masters, as far as I know. Online education is also a good choice for a lot of people and I know that the business schools at the big 3 schools have quite a bit of online options. Then you could do it part-time over several years, no matter what the course was.

I got my masters and all of my certifications attending part-time, online, weekends, etc. and never left my job to do it.

It's all about looking at things with some flexibility....


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

spk, what state do you live in?


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## spk14 (Oct 22, 2010)

There is someone here who thinks I am cold-hearted. I think this particular person is under the impression that I am already in love with a woman and ready to get married. That's not the case. I'm single. I'm just looking at my past few relationships. I could very well fall in love with a woman and not care whether we will be rich or poor as long as we are together. I did not have that feeling with my past girlfriends. Regardless of money, we just were not right for each other. 

Girlfriends of my past wanted to get married, but when they brought thier finances to me, it really grabbed my attention. By this time, there were already several red flags that were scarring me completely irrelevant to finances.

In many cases, the woman had no earning potential, and in one case, a woman's living expenses were three times higher than mine. This woman already had about a dozen or so red flags in our relationship.

When you marry someone, you marry the good and the bad. If that person has huge debt or a high cost of living, that becomes both of your responsibilities. If the wife cannot handle it, it is the husband's job to take care of it.

This can be scary for someone who had to work his entire life to barely make some financial progress. It is more concerning when you have worked hard your entire life and think you might actually be ready to start thinking about buying a house in the forseeable future. If you marry a woman who drains you of your finances and savings, you can say good-bye to that house.

If you love the person, you will not mind giving up the things you want as long as you are with the person. However, I am not currently in a relationship with a possibility of marriage and have not yet met a woman who I would trade everything in the world for. Until that time comes, I will not be ready to marry.

By the way, I do not think 55k is 'measly' despite my original post. I know many people who refer to their outrageously impressive accomplishments and I have always suspected they were exaggerating. Comments in this thread support my belief.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

spk,

You are thought full and make a lot of sense. What matters the most in marriage is of course that you and your spouse are on the same page, love each other and treat each other well. 

When it comes to money we plan as best we can. But sometimes life gets in the way. You are wise to at least try to start on the best foot as possible. You are also wise to discuss finances BEFORE marriage and share each other's financial information before. There have been several threads here about people who got married who did not discuss finances ahead of time. They later find out that their spouse does not agree with their view on finances, one of them spends like crazy. Some have even found out that their new spouse has brought tens of thousands of debt into the marriage and did not even disclose it ahead of time.


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

I'm sorry spk. My husband who was also abusive forced a house on me. Also he wanted me to take a regular job part-time so I could be home for the kids' before and after school, instead of working from home as usual doing my consulting for an ivy league university. I think the issue was that he did not want me to have free time at home or to have an irregular schedule because he was cheating on me. He was very very close with his money, and his house, and used it against me even after I took a job that had a steady paycheck like he wanted me to, because he was risk-averse. 

I would rather live in a yurt and have a faithful husband. When I hear men talking about money and women and affordability, I just blow a fuse. My H used to spend money on me taking me out to dinner or buying me flowers and even got me a couple rings he made a big deal out of even though they were blood diamonds, against my values, along with fancy food. I'm a Quaker. So not into that and told him so. But still he treated me like I valued all that, and used guilt to make me act like I was grateful for what he said he sacrificed for me, even though I never wanted it. 

I think you'll be a good provider. But also I think you would do very well to take advice from my grandmother. Live very frugally and very basic. Do not show your money when you're dating. Only spend when dating what you will be able to afford when you are married. That way you attract someone who loves you for you. All of you, even the financially prudent you, which I do think is endearing. 

I am from NH and here we tend to live very simply. I can live on 2K a month and not want for anything. Even feel wealthy because of the lifestyle here. There is low crime, there is low traffic, there is fresh food and sidewalks and open space. The public schools are nice, no metal detectors. You run into friends and friends of friends just about everywhere. The kids play outdoors, even sled down the street when it snows. People go camping on vacation, for a whole week maybe it's $200. 

I always feel sheepish sometimes because I'm a programmer-analyst with an ivy league degree, I speak/read/write 3 languages and speak another one. I work from home, no day care. Also I have a scholarship to a college here, full-time. I don't have to work much, and what I do, I really like. 

It makes me feel very sad to hear people talk about affording to get married. I wonder what kind of lives people live in other places, where they end up thinking this way? I know from my travels that I come from an unusual place, and that the lifestyle in other places is very different, competitive and isolated even though people live on top of one another. 

I hope you will find someone to love and who loves you too.
That will be the real treasure, but honestly, if you like to have nice things, and a nice home, with pleasant and loving family, I don't see why you can't have all that. Just be careful. But don't let all the worries and contingencies keep you from knowing your heart.

When I was working at an obvious professional job where I couldn't hide my salary, had an office, my own hours, etc. I had the unpleasant experience of someone using me for my money. I put a stop to it. But I could tell I was an 'investment' and so I broke it off with the guy. I saw it from that side...and trust me, there are a lot of women who get in the same situation as you. It's not just a guy thing.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Homemaker_Numero_Uno said:


> It makes me feel very sad to hear people talk about affording to get married. I wonder what kind of lives people live in other places, where they end up thinking this way? I know from my travels that I come from an unusual place, and that the lifestyle in other places is very different, competitive,


Your lifestyle sounds very nice. But in some places it’s not so easy to live frugally.

One of my brothers lives in the Los Angeles area. He is renting a 2 bedroom apartment. It’s not fancy… sort of run-of-the mill. Here in Albuquerque it would rent for about $700 a month. 

He pays $1595 for it. Two bedroom Apartments in the same area that are really nice with a lot of things like a workout room, pool, etc run over $2K a month. His wife (they are getting a divorce) is renting a nice 1 bedroom for $1500 a month. 

I do not get how people are making it at all in some areas of the country.


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## DTO (Dec 18, 2011)

spk14 said:


> Thanks for the reply. I feel more comfortable with numbers. According to my numbers, I'm putting myself in debt $25,000 per year at my current salary if I want to get married and have a kid. That means $100,000 debt in 4 years. That may very well mean having to sell our house and move into a crampt tiny apartment. Although $55,000 may be a measly salary by most people's standards, I feel I've worked too hard to live the rest of my life in poverty.
> 
> As of now, I am single and have no financial worries because of my low cost of living. If I lose my job for whatever reason, I know I have 4 years living expenses in the bank and will have no need to panic.
> 
> ...


First of all, I get that income levels tend to fluctuate with the cost of living in the surrounding area. So while some folks here are saying "can you make more money" I know the answer is "depends on where you live (in large part)".

If you are paying all your expenses on $1,250 per month (I'm assuming the $15k per year includes rent and utilities, food, basic transportation) then you most likely live in a low-cost area, and your salary is pretty good. You would have to make $75k - $80k in most parts of So Cal to live as nice a lifestyle.

Agree you are double counting lots of expenses. How, as was mentioned earlier, are you figuring that a lady is going to add $20k a year in expenses? If you are talking strictly about a wife (no children yet), your additional expenses will be fairly small. Even if you marry someone making a minimum wage, your lifestyle should improve in marriage.

Even if you have a child, you do not NEED a house - it is a luxury. If you have a SAHM because your wife does not make much, you will not need day care (the SAHM will cover that) nor will you need expensive formula (SAHM can breastfeed). Your extra expenses for raising a child will not be near $15k per year.

So, yes you can afford to have a wife and child on your salary. You will have to budget and watch your expenditures, but that is reality for most people. You are frugal, but if your wife has high expectations (a house, pre-school, big family) but no income then you will have problems. However, it is completely reasonable to expect that the solution would be to spend less (something you can control) rather than make more money (which means depending on someone else to pay you more).

A bigger-picture question: what do *you* want? Unless you are underpaid for your job role, earning more is likely to mean putting in more hours at work or changing your career. Would you be happy doing that? Would you be happy with a woman who expects a nice (rather than simply ok) material lifestyle; sounds like you are frugal by nature so it's a fair question to ask.

You seem to be thinking about this in the wrong order. By this I mean you seem to be asking what do you have to do to get a woman. You should be settled on what kind of life you want and then inviting a woman into that life.

If you talking about a CPA license, then I am assuming you are an accountant of some kind. If so, you are correct that your prospects without a CPA license are limited. An MBA is more well suited to financial planning and analysis type work, systems analysis, and other business functions.

Essentially, at this income level you can have the quiet life with a SAHM, or you could find a career woman and live a little more upscale. It really depends on what you want. And, in your early 30s, you still have plenty of time to have a family.

Personally, I would be very hesitant in marrying someone who made a high level of financial success a requirement for her husband. You work hard and can provide a comfortable life as you are now; beyond that point, more money says nothing about what kind of father and husband you will be.


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## FirstYearDown (Sep 15, 2011)

My earning potential went down once the recession hit. 

I returned to college to gain some new skills.

So does this mean my husband should have left me, just because I could no longer make a livable salary with what I was doing? I went from being worth 35K to 22K. I am working on it, but it will take time.

I am not the type of woman who would be happy with making practically nothing for the rest of my life.


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## 30Mom (Jan 21, 2012)

I think you have to be careful about what you wish for also. As the person with the higher earning potential, I expect my husband to make personal and career scarifices. This could mean relocating for her job, quitting your job, and finding a new job in this economy. If you marry someone who could potentially make more than you, are you willing to relocate? Are you willing to stay home and care for the children? You can't expect a career-driven woman to drop everything to be your wife.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

spk14 said:


> Income before taxes: $55,000
> Income after taxes: $40,000
> My annual living expenses: $15,000
> Her annual living expenses: $20,000
> ...


I can tell you, it sure as heck does not have to cost $15,000 a year to raise a child, I have 6 and we have managed to become debt free , own a large Farmhouse, many acres, a large garage and all of our cars (older) with my husband making less than $51,000 a year for the last 14 yrs of our marriage, and I have only held very small side jobs (only making about $3,000 a year or less).

I understand the cost of living is differnt everywhere, where we live it is lower than most places in the country, just a hick town, we even have the AMISH as neigbors in our area. 

We saved when we dated so when we got our 1st house, we had $15,000 to put down on it. Always have something to fall back on, and learn to be frugal, most especially if you are having trouble with a budget. Everything does not have to be bought brand new, or nor do we NEED everything we "want". Some things we can "wait" for. 

*Depends on what you want out of life*. Do you enjoy your job? IS there potential to move up? 

Me & my husband wanted to get married, it was very important to us, it would not have mattered where he was working, just that he WAS working. He worked in a lowly Grocery Store when we married, but I got pregnant quickly after so we decided it would be best to stay home..... when 2 are on the same page, sacrificing for your shared goals & dreams, you can manage to live within your budget, if the WILL is strong enough. Financial discipline is absolutely huge though. Or it will cause horrible fights, even wreck a marraige. 

I feel a Good Health care plan is very important in any financial plan, as without that, anything you have saved can go up in smoke even over a hospital stay....something to figure in with your estimating. 


A husband & wife can always clip coupons for Food, buy (BOGO) deals, buy generics at lower cost Grocery Stores, buy clothes at consignment shops, take advantage of yard sales, only buy on sale , when eating out -use restaurant coupons, get water instead of pop... and get your debt down while dating. 

Trying to pay for Rent and a mortgage with DEBT would have been impossible for us, so we never had any debt except our mortgage. This will help you afford many things you may feel you can't even.

Strive to destroy any debt before getting married and build a nice savings -while you are looking for Mrs. Right.


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## FirstYearDown (Sep 15, 2011)

Rural areas are notoriously cheap.


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## COGypsy (Aug 12, 2010)

spk14 said:


> By the way, I do not think 55k is 'measly' despite my original post. I know many people who refer to their outrageously impressive accomplishments and I have always suspected they were exaggerating. Comments in this thread support my belief.


I would say that $55k is pretty comfortable for most areas. Certainly middle class, especially if you're not living an extravagant lifestyle.

And just as an aside, I'd point out that it's a safe bet that most of the folks that have responded are a few years ahead of you. I myself am 6-7 years older and have been working more or less in my field for 15 years. But $55k is about what I was making at 31 with a masters degree. Time and experience are a wonderful thing for that salary bottom line!


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## nader (May 4, 2011)

I am your age, and we have our first kid already. My wife and I make less than what you make combined. We don't get to do everything we would like, but we are more or less fine. Don't overthink the numbers - it sounds like you will be fine. The real question is, can you afford to get divorced?


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## I'mInLoveWithMyHubby (Nov 7, 2011)

My husband does not make a 6 figure income. We are a family of 5 and I'm a SAHM. Last year was rough since we were paying $2,000 a month out of pocket for health insurance. That was $600 more a month then our house payment. We were behind every month basically paying 2 mortgages. This year should be better, hopefully. We make a lot of sacrifices, but it's worth it. We try to live as frugal as possible! I'm disabled and unable to work and I can not collect disability.

My husband and I have a beautiful relationship. We have a very special and strong bond to each otter. I couldn't imagine life any other way.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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