# Opinions please



## smooshie (Dec 29, 2011)

Hi all, 
Hubby and I are having a dilemma about my husband changing a career. He works abroad and we (me and our 3 little girls) live with him which is great as we all travel together a lot. The problem is, I got sick and I'm not getting the proper treatment where we're currently located. The doctors here are quacks. We always have to drive 2 hrs to the city just to get a better treatment but I still don't trust the doctors there either. Unlike in Canada, we have our own family doctor (my doctor since I was a small child). 
Anyways, me and the girls are all flying back to Canada next wk to get proper treatment. Anyways, my dad offered for all us incl. hubby to stay at his place for 3 yrs so hubby can change career. He can help him get a job at where he's working at. But hubby will start as on call first. He said that normally it takes 2-3 yrs before you get permanent. The salary is much lower than what hubby's earning now bu it has pension, dental, medical, etc... perks. Our dilemma is, we don't want to be stuck at my dad's house forever coz we won't be able to afford buying a house for the much low salary. Yes I can work but not for a while. We have 1 infant, 1 baby and a little girl so I'll be busy for a while. Also, hubby will be 45 this yr, kinda too late too start a new career. Another thing also is, hubby has a Master's degree and we don't want it to go to waste. 
On the other hand, we're thinking of maybe staying in Can. for good is a better option as where we are now, the school is not good and medical and the driving is dangerous. We're planning to relocate to the city/another country (jobwise) but not guarantee that it'll be better of everything.
We've sold most of our things here but we haven't sold our car yet as we're still thinking of maybe changing a career not a good idea? Any opinions please?
Thank you


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

This is a huge question that it hard to respond to with really so little info.

What kind of work does your husband do now? Could he find work in the same field in Canada?

Can your illness be 'fixed' if you stayed in Canada for a short while, allowing your husband to do his current job where you now live?

could your husband start his own business, doing what he does now if you move to Canada?


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Also, has your husband job hunted in his current field in Canada?


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

EleGirl said:


> This is a huge question that it hard to respond to with really so little info.


Agreed.


...wanted to add, that's a very generous offer from your dad.


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## smooshie (Dec 29, 2011)

EleGirl said:


> This is a huge question that it hard to respond to with really so little info.
> 
> What kind of work does your husband do now? Could he find work in the same field in Canada?
> 
> ...



My husband is a teacher.

We moved back to Canada 2 yrs ago from living abroad and we stayed there for 2.5 yrs. The whole 2.5 yrs, he was always laid off or just working 1 full semester here and there. We had enough so we moved back to the Middle East where he has a stable full time work 10 months per yr with 2 months vacation pay. No pension, dental though but medical is included but not all like maternity isn't covered.

I can stay with he kids in Canada for a short while but the thing is, you have to cancel your health care card in Canada if you're not a resident paying tax/no tax then when you get sick and want to be treated in Canada, you'll have to re-apply again and there's a wait period of 3 months. I always thought that I'm a healthy person but I've started getting heart problem and I'm only 32. We're flying back to Canada next wk and won't be able to get medical help for 3 months. I'm going to see a good cardiologist here if I can (2 hrs drive to the city) before leaving and maybe get some meds to hold me up to 3 months. I just don't trust the doctors here anymore. For instance, when I started getting heart palpitations, we went to the emergency and they made us wait for hours before finally getting treated and they just did an ECG and prescribed me an over the counter stomach acid pills. I didn't take them as I don't have any stomach ulcer. Then we went to see another doctor at another town and still no luck. We went to see a 3rd doctor here and he told us to take the pills recommended so I did. I was supposed to be 2 pills twice a day for 5 days. On the 3rd day of taking the pills and still having heart palpitations, we drove the city which is 2 hrs away. The hospital isn't covered by hubby's medical insurance and it's catered for expats. The cardiologist did an echo testing done and found the problem an it's ony benign. I don't really trust him so I'm seeing a different cardiology at another more expensive hospital catered for expats in the city to get a 2nd opinion before I fly to Canada. I don't trust him as he prescribed me a medication that I should take for 20 days but it's giving me still heart palpitations and chest tightness.

I don't want hubby to work abroad while me and the kids live in Canada as I grew up not seeing my dad a lot. He was always working away/abroad and I felt like he was just a stranger whenever he was home. Hubby had the same experienced with his father.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

What level does your husband teach at? University?

How much less (percentage wise) would your husband earn working where your father works?

It would seem that the low cost/free health care in Canada would make up for a lot.

Would you one day inherit your father's house? Could this make up for you not being able to buy a home?

could your husband take on teaching jobs while he works at the same place your father does.. for example a friend of my father's taught at the local university 2 nights a week for over 20 years. This was to augment his day job. This kept him active in the career field he loved.


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## smooshie (Dec 29, 2011)

heartsbeating said:


> Agreed.
> 
> 
> ...wanted to add, that's a very generous offer from your dad.



Yes I know, we just don't want to live at my dad's house forever.
Hubby will start on call first for maybe 2-3 yrs before getting permanent and my dad said that while staying at his house, we can start saving money for mortgage. Buying a house in Canada is very expensive. If we did manage to put enough down payment on a house, we're worried about the monthly mortgage if it's enough to pay the house, food, gas, bills, etc....
Plus we can't commit on a 25/30 yr mortgage. Hubby's already turning 45 this yr. Our plan living here abroad was to save loads of money for a down payment, have a 15 yr mortgage and rent out our house while living abroad.


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## smooshie (Dec 29, 2011)

EleGirl said:


> What level does your husband teach at? University?
> 
> He's an English teacher working at a University.
> 
> ...


My husband worked at the top University in Canada before but they just gave him 3 semester work ful time and after that just on call work which was conflicting his new job at a College he worked at as he had to work there for 2 semester full time.


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## appletree (Oct 9, 2012)

I guess sooner or later you want to go back to Canada anyway. It is very generous of your father that you can stay there but I wouldn't do that for more than say two months it never does good.
I would try to live from what you have other families do this too. Given your health health insurance is worth a lot of money.


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## smooshie (Dec 29, 2011)

appletree said:


> I guess sooner or later you want to go back to Canada anyway. It is very generous of your father that you can stay there but I wouldn't do that for more than say two months it never does good.
> I would try to live from what you have other families do this too. Given your health health insurance is worth a lot of money.


You mean take my father's offer?


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

It seems like $45,000 should be a good enough income...


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## tennisstar (Dec 19, 2011)

$45k for a family if 5 with a high cost if living? Not a good income to survive on...
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

Question for you... How's your plan working out now as far as saving money while working abroad? Have you been doing it long enough to tell if it's a good plan? There are places in Canada that have lower costs of living, and those are often areas that need teachers. How selective are you being about where you live?

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## smooshie (Dec 29, 2011)

PBear said:


> Question for you... How's your plan working out now as far as saving money while working abroad? Have you been doing it long enough to tell if it's a good plan? There are places in Canada that have lower costs of living, and those are often areas that need teachers. How selective are you being about where you live?
> 
> C
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


We've been living abroad on and off for 6 yrs now. 
We've saved a lot of money but some got spent this yr buying a new vehicle fully paid. I thought that living abroad was a good plan but I got sick and I've realized that health care in Canada is much better than living abroad. We were planning to move next yr to a diff. country but still Middle East where hubby can earn more money but can't guarantee if health care is better there.
I don't mind relocating anywhere in Canada. It seems like teaching is a bad career in Canada though. My mother who works at the school board always tells me that teachers are always getting laid off at the school she works at.
To be honest, the plan was for us to live abroad until the kids go to high school then me and the kids move back to Canada while hubby continues working until retirement. But deep inside, I don't want our family to be separated when the time comes. I just didn't want to think about it.


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

tennisstar said:


> $45k for a family if 5 with a high cost if living? Not a good income to survive on...
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


But they'll be living with her dad for 2 or 3 years, putting that money in the bank for a downpayment on a house, and the job will be morphing into a higher-paying job. Seems a lot more promising for a family of 5 to live low for 2 or 3 years (years that the kids won't remember anyway), to build a future than where they are now.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

No offense, but if your plan was "to save loads of money" for a down payment on a house so you can do a 15 year mortgage, and after 6 years a significant chunk of money was spent on a brand new vehicle that will likely be very difficult to import back to canada and you just lost a bunch of value on, you may want to rethink your plan. Doesn't sound like you're getting too far ahead. 

Your mother works at A school board. How much research have the two of you done looking across the country? 

Don't know what else to tell you. Yes, the medical care here is good. But your plan for the future seems fuzzy, and time is running out. Do you want to be in the same situation in 5 years, when your husband is 50?

C


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## smooshie (Dec 29, 2011)

smooshie said:


> We've been living abroad on and off for 6 yrs now.
> We've saved a lot of money but some got spent this yr buying a new vehicle fully paid. I thought that living abroad was a good plan but I got sick and I've realized that health care in Canada is much better than living abroad. We were planning to move next yr to a diff. country but still Middle East where hubby can earn more money but can't guarantee if health care is better there.
> I don't mind relocating anywhere in Canada. It seems like teaching is a bad career in Canada though. My mother who works at the school board always tells me that teachers are always getting laid off at the school she works at.
> To be honest, the plan was for us to live abroad until the kids go to high school then me and the kids move back to Canada while hubby continues working until retirement. But deep inside, I don't want our family to be separated when the time comes. I just didn't want to think about it.


We bought a brand new car as we've been renting a car most of the time here and it the rate per month goes up every yr so we've decided to buy one so it's cheaper in the long run. Also, we don't trust buying a 2nd hand car here as there are always accidents not reported. 
Yes I do agree with you about our plans in the future. I am frustrated about my husband that he doesn't want to think what's for the best for our family. Our future plan is my decision but I am not really sure it it's going to work. I always ask my father for any advice but he doesn't really want to get involve with our decision. He did offer his help though and he wants us to decide soon. I'm just not sure if it's enough to live on money wise.


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## Unique Username (Jul 6, 2013)

There are a lot of Universities in Canada and the USA.

Health and proper health care is really important ESPECIALLY with 3 little children.

Weigh your pros and cons.

Canada, less money, better health care, family help now and (god forbid) if something worse were to happen with your health.
Your father being able to be with his Grandchildren. etc.

More money, in the Middle East where they don't really like women anyway, improper healthcare, no familial support etc.

No one can decide for you though - we can only just offer points of view, suggestions. 

and yes very generous of your Father.


Make your lists and see which has the most positive attributes for your health and your future. 

More money isn't everything...especially if it could potentially mean you wouldn't be there to care for those babies.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

I think that your health is a HUGE consideration in this situation. If you are not getting the medical care you need, then I would think you need to move to a place where you can get it. 

If you are healthier, you can also get a job so that improves the income situation as well.

Just some thoughts.


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