# Isn't it better after 40 having a husband with high sex drive?aging isn't good to sex



## marcopoly69 (Sep 7, 2010)

I read here so many people arguing that too much of a high sex drive is not good, well, what about as you get older and biologics kick in?....are you sure that you don't want to have a partner who no matter how you look want to make love to you, give you oral, and as much pleasure as possilble?...I mean, life is short and you don't get any younger or hotter...shound'nt you embrace and feel lucky that you have a man or wife that wants to give you and receive as mas pleasure as possible?...:scratchhead:


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## sailorgirl (Jun 9, 2010)

marcopoly69 said:


> I read here so many people arguing that too much of a high sex drive is not good, well, what about as you get older and biologics kick in?....are you sure that you don't want to have a partner who no matter how you look want to make love to you, give you oral, and as much pleasure as possilble?...I mean, life is short and you don't get any younger or hotter...shound'nt you embrace and feel lucky that you have a man or wife that wants to give you and receive as mas pleasure as possible?...:scratchhead:


Amen. I would love to have a man who actually wants sex more than 3 times a year.


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## marcopoly69 (Sep 7, 2010)

I mean so many people get caught up and frustrated because her / his partner has a high sex drive and they don't know how to handle them....well, after 40 when women become more confortable with sex, they your hubby start giving up and basically so much rejection gets to you and that's shouldn't be....if you have a partner with a higher sex drive than you, embrace it and deal with it, because later in life, is going to be your jack pot!!...when everyone else is getting almost none, or very lame sex, you'll getting whatever you want to experience....for example, myself I am a butt and pu..y licking guy, I like anal, vaginal, bjs, filming, fu..k my wife face, etc....2 years ago, i couldn't even finger my wife....today after a lot of work, honesty, communication and understanding, my wife understood that i don't have a hidden agenda, that i don't want to abuse her....is the way i am...the way god made me...and not having access to her body the way i needed was killing me....today, i have everything i dreamed of....not perfect, but i love my wife for letting herself loose and give herself to me in a way that finally i feel really loved.....


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

marcopoly69 said:


> I read here so many people arguing that too much of a high sex drive is not good


Ha Ha, you'll never hear me coming from this camp of thought! Sadly I spent far too many years not thinking about how important it was, taking our sexuality totally for granted. 

I am not at all happy with the fact men start slowing down as they age, I let this play on my mind more than it should. But I am blissfully thankful I live in the era of such wonderful (even accidental) discoveries as good ol' Viagra. Now we can go till we hit dust.


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## frustr8dhubby (Dec 23, 2010)

Tell me exactly when that kicks in. My wife will be 44 in a few months and still has absolutely no desire for sex...


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## SadSamIAm (Oct 29, 2010)

SimplyAmorous said:


> Ha Ha, you'll never hear me coming from this camp of thought! Sadly I spent far too many years not thinking about how important it was, taking our sexuality totally for granted.
> 
> I am not at all happy with the fact men start slowing down as they age, I let this play on my mind more than it should. But I am blissfully thankful I live in the era of such wonderful (even accidental) discoveries as good ol' Viagra. Now we can go till we hit dust.


Does Viagra help with recovery time? When I was younger, I could recover within minutes or seconds and sometimes just keep going.


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## Wild1 (Dec 29, 2010)

frustr8dhubby said:


> My wife will be 44 in a few months and still has absolutely no desire for sex...



Good news / bad news time...

Good news: You wife has desire for sex.

Bad news: It's not with you. Sorry.


Link:

Your Wife Has No Desire for Sex? You Better Read This - Associated Content from Yahoo! - associatedcontent.com


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## magixz64 (Jan 18, 2011)

sailorgirl said:


> Amen. I would love to have a man who actually wants sex more than 3 times a year.


I hear that!! my hubby gives it to me maybe once every 9 months and only 'cause I brought it up and caused a fight...


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

SadSamIAm said:


> Does Viagra help with recovery time? When I was younger, I could recover within minutes or seconds and sometimes just keep going.


 Not sure how old you are now & what you are trying to accomplish but I think this depends on how much mg's you take & your desire level to get it back up. I think everyone is different. 

My husband has 50mg pills but we cut them into 4's = 12.5 mg (what I call slithers) and I only give them to him once in awhile, less than not for sure. We have found on some of those night's where he may be a little tired, or we've been doing it "nights" in a row, taking one of these does the trick, just keeps him harder. 

Although I have not tried, I do not think he could regain another erection a half hour later-not even an hour later, his desire level would be exhausted. He is not a young overly horny man like he used to be. 

But I will say, even with this small slither, he will wake up Hard 7-8 hours later sometimes with no touch, it is just there (I know this is the lagging effects) because generally if we have sex near bedtime, he does not wake up with a woody. Only if we have not been engaged for over a full day or more & this happens randomly at his age. (Now 47) 

So yes, you can definetely get MORE erections & CLOSER erections out of Viagra -- Lessoning that refractory period . 

The Higher the does, I am sure the better it will work too . But you might get a headache & a really stuffy nose at the same time. (another reason to take as small of dosage as you need). They sell them in 25mg, 50mg & 100mg.


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## MsLonely (Sep 23, 2010)

Hi SimplyAmorous,

My husband has got 100mg viagra from the doctor, and he tried to cut it into 4 pieces.

It works well, but it's hard for him to climax and ejaculate even after 20-30 mins intercourse. 

Is it normal ?

I'm exhuasted already, also he is exhausted, but he can hardly reach his orgasm.

Does your husband face same problem?

Any advice?


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## OhGeesh (Jan 5, 2010)

Good change of attitude Marcopoly!!

I've taken Viagra just to see and did nothing for me except make me feel like I'm 15! Every side effect you can get I got most will never take that crap again.

As far as SEX my wife has been the same..for the most part...our whole married life.

2-3x a week if average for over 10yrs now. The only time is what alot more was when we were 18-22.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

MsLonely said:


> Hi SimplyAmorous,
> 
> My husband has got 100mg viagra from the doctor, and he tried to cut it into 4 pieces.
> 
> ...


 With or without V, my husband can usually "go" within a few minutes of slow pumping (after some forplay - we average maybe 6 minutes give or take), most often he is struggling to wait for me, having to stop here & there, waiting for me to get mine 1st. 

Now, if we tried to have a 2nd romp like maybe 9 or so hrs later --for those times when he took that slither & it is still working, Yes, it does take him alot longer, could be 20 minutes-
the last morning BJ I gave took that long & literally a dry orgasm at that. He just doesn't "need" it that much. Once a day is his kosher limit. 

* Does your husband take any other meds *? Lots of meds can slow reaching orgasm for many people. I have a some friends, we are very open with our sex talk, his wife was telling us it has always taken him over an hour to climax, one of the reasons sex is a chore for her. He is on "adderall". Don't think he ever tried Viagra. 

It is supposed to help you "last longer" though, I have read where docs have given it for Pre-mature Ejaculation issues. Have you tried giving him a lower dose to see if it makes him firm enough. Maybe a lower dose will have less of that lasting effect. But 25mg is decently low. They say with lower Test, some can go " too fast" and some struggle to go.


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## gregj123 (Dec 29, 2010)

Wow Ill be 44 soon I my sex drive is through the roof has always been like that.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

gregj123 said:


> Wow Ill be 44 soon I my sex drive is through the roof has always been like that.


And I bet you have a nice hairy chest like a Bear too - and might be loosing some on top of the head ? These are all signs of a HIGH Test guy.


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## gregj123 (Dec 29, 2010)

SimplyAmorous said:


> And I bet you have a nice hairy chest like a Bear too - and might be loosing some on top of the head ? These are all signs of a HIGH Test guy.


LOL NO!!!! full head of hair! not that bad LOL,just because you like alot of sex dont mean your test is too high!


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## Draguna (Jan 13, 2011)

SimplyAmorous said:


> And I bet you have a nice hairy chest like a Bear too - and might be loosing some on top of the head ? These are all signs of a HIGH Test guy.


I'm pretty sure that a man loosing hair is determined by a few gene sequences, not due to hormone balance. A man needs only one copy of the different sequences to become bald, women need those gene sequences on both to end up with thinner hair. Now, I could be wrong, so feel free to correct me.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## MarriedWifeInLove (May 28, 2010)

I'm glad the little blue pill works for some, but doesn't for mine.

We've tried all of them, Viagra, Cialis, Levitra, you name it. Doesn't work at all. But his issues are also not only physical in nature, but meds and I believe some psychological issues too (MO).

Wish it did work - we have 3 full bottles. I've tried slipping him some thinking maybe it did work and he didn't want me to know. but alas - it did nothing.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

Draguna said:


> I'm pretty sure that a man loosing hair is determined by a few gene sequences, not due to hormone balance. A man needs only one copy of the different sequences to become bald, women need those gene sequences on both to end up with thinner hair. Now, I could be wrong, so feel free to correct me.




This article seems to agree with us both ! Testosterone & Baldness - Testosterone Levels & Male Hair Loss – HealthTree 

and

Male Pattern Baldness


While testosterone does play it's role in male patern baldness, so does genes. Generally the more Test you have, the hairy your chest though. http://www.labtestsonline.org/understanding/analytes/testosterone/faq.html#3

I compare my husband's chest to the Charley Brown Christmas tree's needles. Not that this bothers me, I prefer a bare chest - love that look but it would be nice if he had the hormones of the guy with the Hairy chest. We can't have everything we want I guess. I do love the fact at almost 50, he still has all his hair. 

Ironically, those who want to get "Hair Replacement" due to the High Test that can cause it - will then find it being reversed in order to get their hair back! Something to be very cautious about if thinking of getting hair replacement , many complaints & stories online . 

Please read this Propecia Side Effects - Impotence, Low Libido, Erectile Dysfunction, Finasteride


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

gregj123 said:


> Just because you like alot of sex dont mean your test is too high!


This I know, Love the ability of our minds to arouse us in addition to our drives.

Some of us, we just have "Sex on the Brain" ! 

Amazon.com: Sex on the Brain: 12 Lessons to Enhance Your Love Life (9780307339089): Daniel G. Amen M.D.: Books


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## gregj123 (Dec 29, 2010)

Im better now thean when I was 25! hope it stays like that.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

gregj123 said:


> Im better now thean when I was 25! hope it stays like that.


What is your secret to this renewed stamina then- as this is not generally how it plays out for men as they age? Taking some really good vitamins? Working out X amount a day? Just not as busy now as in your younger days? 

Lots of women here would be up for hearing how to "energize" the men in our lives - just a little more.


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## Draguna (Jan 13, 2011)

SimplyAmorous said:


> This I know, Love the ability of our minds to arouse us in addition to our drives.
> 
> Some of us, we just have "Sex on the Brain" !
> 
> Amazon.com: Sex on the Brain: 12 Lessons to Enhance Your Love Life (9780307339089): Daniel G. Amen M.D.: Books


Yeah, that would be me. Just a breeze could arouse me, but I'm completely not agressive or a typical male. Doesn't matter how I feel, ill, headache, sick, stressed, I still get aroused so quickly. Only moments I do not, are when I have asthma or I'm nauseated.

Must be my hedonistic nature.


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## gregj123 (Dec 29, 2010)

Ive always been like that hope it stays like it!!


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## Sierra61 (Feb 22, 2010)

I think it's absurd to suggest hairy chests corrolate to high testosterone. The Beatles all had testosterone levels through the roof (Paul routinely had sex with 7 to 8 groupies per night when they were on tour). None of them had hairy chests, because they are British.

Northern European men generally don't have the hairy chests of Arabs, Greeks or darker races. It's just an evolutionary thing. It has nothing to do with testosterone. Millions of care-chested men have huge sex drives and plenty of those with hairy chests have low testosterone.


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## Sierra61 (Feb 22, 2010)

Also, to Marriedwifeinlove....

Viagra only works when sexual arousal occurs. Slipping the pill into a man's drink or food won't instantly give him an erection unless he's sexually aroused at the same time. Viagra is not an aphrodisiac and makes no claim to be one.


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## lucky_guy (Jan 23, 2011)

Sierra61 said:


> Also, to Marriedwifeinlove....
> 
> Viagra only works when sexual arousal occurs. Slipping the pill into a man's drink or food won't instantly give him an erection unless he's sexually aroused at the same time. Viagra is not an aphrodisiac and makes no claim to be one.


Sexual arousal with ED can be very different to what is needed if you don't have ED. Unfortunately :-(


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## UserName1 (Oct 22, 2013)

frustr8dhubby said:


> Tell me exactly when that kicks in. My wife will be 44 in a few months and still has absolutely no desire for sex...


Mine is 44 next month and we're in the same boat! Says she really likes it when it does occasionally happen, just zero interest. At 6 months and counting.....


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## romantic_guy (Nov 8, 2011)

SimplyAmorous said:


> I am not at all happy with the fact men start slowing down as they age, I let this play on my mind more than it should.


Men slow down as they age???? News to me!!! At 58 I am as horny as ever!! And once the doctors get to the bottom of why my wife has been feeling so lousy for the past 9 months after surgery, I hope she gets a bit more horny too. :smthumbupFYI...she is being tested for celiac disease. Hard to be horny when you don't feel good most of the time).


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## ChargingCharlie (Nov 14, 2012)

UserName1 said:


> Mine is 44 next month and we're in the same boat! Says she really likes it when it does occasionally happen, just zero interest. At 6 months and counting.....


Mine is a few years older, and we've had sex three times in the last three years. She says she's too tired after work and kids to think about sex. I know she's not cheating. She just has no interest or desire for sex. I don't even bother bringing it up, as it will lead to duty sex ("Are you ready to finish" two minutes in), and I'll get more out of my hand


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## Goldmember357 (Jan 31, 2012)

Men can also get shots of testosterone monthly to increase their testosterone levels. This does wonders, it can make a 40 year old man have the energy an in shape 22 year old version of himself had.


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## DesertRat1978 (Aug 27, 2013)

SimplyAmorous said:


> What is your secret to this renewed stamina then- as this is not generally how it plays out for men as they age? Taking some really good vitamins? Working out X amount a day? Just not as busy now as in your younger days?
> 
> Lots of women here would be up for hearing how to "energize" the men in our lives - just a little more.


While this was not directed at me, my sex drive has went up starting in my early 30's. One of my thoughts about how this could be is that I have became more active. I make a point of riding my bike to and from work. This comes out to roughly 60 miles a week. 

Also, I have started to consume a healthier diet. Drinking less beer and consuming less fast food. 

The final item is that I started branching out in the bedroom and found that somethings that I used to think were taboo really turn me on. One example is being assertive and a bit dominating.


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## mineforever (Jan 31, 2013)

frustr8dhubby said:


> Tell me exactly when that kicks in. My wife will be 44 in a few months and still has absolutely no desire for sex...



That after menapause libido increase usually doesn't start to later 40' s early 50's. Hit about 47 for me and I am naturally HD....I got unreally HD poor hubs didn't know what to do with me. :-D. Toys are our friends now!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

romantic_guy said:


> Men slow down as they age???? News to me!!! At 58 I am as horny as ever!! And once the doctors get to the bottom of why my wife has been feeling so lousy for the past 9 months after surgery, I hope she gets a bit more horny too. :smthumbupFYI...she is being tested for celiac disease. Hard to be horny when you don't feel good most of the time).


When my husband was a teen, he could whack it up to 5 times a day...so he's told me... once a day is his limit at age 49 -or he needs to pop a pill... The refractory period is just not what it used to be.... 

From all my reading on hormones, this is pretty normal for men ...as they loose 1 -2% of their Test every year...also their estrogen goes up and some of those more aggressive men find themselves feeling more TAME, like a fun loving Grandpa...being more attentive to their wives even. (though I already know my husband seems to be a little LOWER TEST than the average for his age.. was told this by an Endocrinologist 5 yrs ago -after getting some of his Testosterone results). 

But learning these things years ago, surely helped me feel better...as I was thinking "What the heck is wrong with him?"... I thought all I needed to do was touch him (didn't matter how often) and he'd be UP & ready to roll.... that was a shock to my system... 

When you're not getting it as often as you'd like...you feel like you're high drive... if you did a wife swap with a Nympho - I bet she'd give you a run for your money at age 58!



> *tyler1978 said:* While this was not directed at me, my sex drive has went up starting in my early 30's. One of my thoughts about how this could be is that I have became more active. I make a point of riding my bike to and from work. This comes out to roughly 60 miles a week.
> 
> Also, I have started to consume a healthier diet. Drinking less beer and consuming less fast food.
> 
> The final item is that I started branching out in the bedroom and found that somethings that I used to think were taboo really turn me on. One example is being assertive and a bit dominating.


 This all makes sense, right...you got more active, pumping up the Test, you started eating better... you started looking better (with those other 2 -I would imagine so)...your confidence rose, plus you let go of the some of those earlier Taboo thoughts... stirring your sexual passions... after all, they say SEX starts in the Brain... all a Great plus for the bedroom!


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## Coach8 (Jun 17, 2013)

I'm 34. I've always been HD. But it has gotten even higher the last 3-4 years (I would like 3-4 times a day if time permitted). Unfortunately, my wife has been having thyroid problems which has caused her drive, which was lower than mine before, to decrease. Although, they have her on some medicine now and we have had either oral or sex 5 of the last 6 nights, so I am hopeful!


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## RickyC (Apr 26, 2013)

Wow, I can't believe when I read that some men just simply are not interested in sex. Let's just say that I started exploring my own body very young and its been a non-stop adventure. I have been married about 20 years and my wife has never been able to keep up. A few years ago, something did kick in, not sure what, but my sex drive is in overdrive. It is difficult though having a sex drive of 10 when your wife is at 1 and trying to remain faithful. I am a numbers person and lets just say that between myself and wife I am at 175 for the year... not too bad for 50. I am refusing to grow old and sit in some damn chair until I croke! I see people younger than me that look 20 years older than me... Not gonna happen.


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## 40isthenew20 (Jul 12, 2012)

The fact that the multi-billion dollar industry for Viagra and the like shows that there are couples out there banging away in their 40s and above. The marketing ploy shows that the guy needs to use the pill to keep up with his wife and satisfy her when his body is working against him. 

If those ads were based on my marriage, it would show an already HD husband chasing his L to MD wife around the house even more than before and her trying to stave it off, giving in once a week and jerking him off a few other nights so she can go to sleep.


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## missthelove2013 (Sep 23, 2013)

hmm...when I was 25-30...I was able to have sex whenever I wanted...even if I wasnt in the mood...hell I had sex at the tail end of stomach flu even though I didnt want to...erections were no problem...and I could go many times...

NOW...at 45...I nead more coaxing, and a lot more down time between...I still have VERY high Drive...but my body is not always with my libido...I am not ready for the little blue pill yet, I AM taking steps as far as diet, exercise...NO MASTURBATION or porn, to make it better

This is why older women like younger men...


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## 40isthenew20 (Jul 12, 2012)

I don't think that there is any ailment that would make me turn down sex. A flu, bad cold, shivering fever - any wouldn't effect me to the point where I wouldn't want to have sex or at least masturbate. 

That's how I know women are different than men. Any slight headache, cramp, stomach ache, my wife plants the seed that she's not doing anything that night.


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## SunnyT (Jun 22, 2011)

40isthenew20 said:


> I don't think that there is any ailment that would make me turn down sex. A flu, bad cold, shivering fever - any wouldn't effect me to the point where I wouldn't want to have sex or at least masturbate.
> 
> That's how I know women are different than men. Any slight headache, cramp, stomach ache, my wife plants the seed that she's not doing anything that night.


That's not "women"....that's one woman. I say there is nothing like a good romp to relieve a headache, or menstrual cramps, or general achiness. Luckily for me, my H feels the same way. :smthumbup: I know other men who are just as wussy as the wussy women.


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## BRT (May 6, 2014)

My wife just turned 49 and became super-horny after the last 15 of never wanting sex but twice a year when I could go all the time. Hopefully this lasts,as I have so earned it remaining faithful for the last 20 years.


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## BRT (May 6, 2014)

Now it seems she is back to the mood swings and hot flashes -- what gives?


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

marcopoly69 said:


> I mean so many people get caught up and frustrated because her / his partner has a high sex drive and they don't know how to handle them....well, after 40 when women become more confortable with sex, they your hubby start giving up and basically so much rejection gets to you and that's shouldn't be....if you have a partner with a higher sex drive than you, embrace it and deal with it, because later in life, is going to be your jack pot!!...when everyone else is getting almost none, or very lame sex, you'll getting whatever you want to experience....for example, myself I am a butt and pu..y licking guy, I like anal, vaginal, bjs, filming, fu..k my wife face, etc....2 years ago, i couldn't even finger my wife....today after a lot of work, honesty, communication and understanding, my wife understood that i don't have a hidden agenda, that i don't want to abuse her....is the way i am...the way god made me...and not having access to her body the way i needed was killing me....today, i have everything i dreamed of....not perfect, but i love my wife for letting herself loose and give herself to me in a way that finally i feel really loved.....


A TAM success story. I bet in your wildest imagination you couldn't imagine it turning around like this.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

40isthenew20 said:


> The fact that the multi-billion dollar industry for Viagra and the like shows that there are couples out there banging away in their 40s and above. The marketing ploy shows that the guy needs to use the pill to keep up with his wife and satisfy her when his body is working against him.
> 
> If those ads were based on my marriage, it would show an already HD husband chasing his L to MD wife around the house even more than before and her trying to stave it off, giving in once a week and jerking him off a few other nights so she can go to sleep.


My belief is the increase in Cialis and Viagra sales was due to politics that disempowered males and empowered females. A lot of guys got their d1cks killed in the process.


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## Mr. Nail (Apr 26, 2011)

FYI I'm low Testosterone, High Drive and Balding.
Due to Diabetes I've used Cialis and Levetra. What helps my stamina the most is swimming. 
MN


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## Holland (Aug 20, 2012)

Mr H is in his 50s and no decline in drive or stamina, we have sex 10 or more times a week. No long refractory period either, he can have sex within an hour again. Fwiw he has a hairy chest and thinning on top, has always been very HD. We hope to be having great sex for many years to come. I am late 40's and also very HD. The chemistry between us is amazing, IME this is they key factor, simply to be having sex with the right person, someone that turns you on.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Lordhavok (Mar 14, 2012)

I dont take viagra or cialis or nothing. I've had a high drive ever since I can remember. I started taking t injections 5 or so months back. I didnt have problems in the bedroom, just lack of energy and staying fatigued. Thats not an issue anymore with the injections. Doc told me that my drive hasnt slowed down by now, it probably wont, I turn 45 next month. The injections make me feel like a horny teenager again though, I was already hd and now thats up twice as bad and I'm wearing the wife out, lol. As far as a rest period between sessions, it really all depends. If we been going at it at least once a day, usually one shot has her and me both satisfied. But if I've had to give her a break for a few days, after 30 minutes, I'm ready to go again. After lots of sex for 4 or 5 days in a row, I need a break myself. Just really depends on the person and how their schedule works I guess. Who knows, maybe in a few years I'll need viagra or something. I dont cut my hair because its falling out, lol.


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