# talked to husband



## denise1218 (Dec 24, 2010)

Okay...when my husband and I last texted...he accused me of looking at his profile on a dating website. I told him it wasn't me but could tell that he didnt' believe me. He later called and apologized because he looked at a diff. picture and obviously it wasn't me. I accepted his apology. Talked to him on the phone last night. I feel so horrible on many different levels...he is not doing good. The lonliness of coming home to an empty apt. and the lonliness of not seeing the kids daily is really taking a toll on him. He told me that he was thinking of killing himself but then he pictured our kids faces and could not do it. I don't know what to do. He doesnt want to fix our marriage as husband and wife and he won't let me be there as a friend for him....because that is what he needs. I told him that after 20 years together....there is nobody who knows him like I do and vice versa. I want to be there for him so bad. He told me he did find some girls on the dating website...not so much for a relationship but just someone to talk to, at least that is what he told me. Anyways, a few of the girls kinda gave him the brush off. He made the comment that he will probably just end up with any girl who will take any interest in him. I know I have totally hurt him with my lying. But...he is the love of my life....I so badly want him...but can't have him. I told him that he is going to make some girl very lucky and told him I should know....BUT, he better not settle with just anybody. He wants no part of it for fear that I will just keep hurting him. I am going to therapy and I am learning alot about myself and my actions...is it possible that he could work thru the pain? Do you think there could be a chance down the road for us? What do I need to do....be there for him or back off?? Please I need advice.


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