# Mom Jailed Because She Let Her 9-Year-Old Daughter Play in the Park Unsupervised



## Theseus

I lived in Germany for many years, and this story would never even happen there. Kids of all ages played at the park without parents every day. Even for America though, this is over the top. One comment from the site that made me chuckle: "_jezus f*ck, who wants to live in a country where you can't let your nine-year-old go play in the park without having to be physically present watching her, every ****ing second?_"



Mom Jailed Because She Let Her 9-Year-Old Daughter Play in the Park Unsupervised - Hit & Run : Reason.com
Lenore Skenazy|Jul. 14, 2014 9:10 am

Just in case you thought you could parent whatever way you see fit in 2014 America:

A North Augusta mother is in jail after witnesses say she left her nine-year-old daughter at a nearby park, for hours at a time.
Hours at a time? At a park? In the summer? Gosh! That certainly sounds normal and fun like a reason to throw a mom in jail—and place the child in state custody.

Here are the facts: Debra Harrell works at McDonald's in North Augusta, South Carolina. For most of the summer, her daughter had stayed there with her, playing on a laptop that Harrell had scrounged up the money to purchase. (McDonald's has free WiFi.) Sadly, the Harrell home was robbed and the laptop stolen, so the girl asked her mother if she could be dropped off at the park to play instead.

Harrell said yes. She gave her daughter a cell phone. The girl went to the park—a place so popular that at any given time there are about 40 kids frolicking—two days in a row. There were swings, a "splash pad," and shade. On her third day at the park, an adult asked the girl where her mother was. At work, the daughter replied.

The shocked adult called the cops. Authorities declared the girl "abandoned" and proceeded to arrest the mother.

Watch the news: It sounds like Debra Harrell committed a serious, unconscionable crime. The reporter looks ready to burst with contempt. But what are the facts? She let her daughter play at the park for several hours at a time—like we did as kids. She gave her a daughter a phone if she needed to call. Any "danger" was not only theoretical, it was exceedingly unlikely.

But, "What if a man would've come and snatched her?" said a woman interviewed by the TV station.

To which I must ask: In broad daylight? In a crowded park? Just because something happened on Law & Order doesn't mean it's happening all the time in real life. Make "what if?" thinking the basis for an arrest and the cops can collar anyone. "You let your son play in the front yard? What if a man drove up and kidnapped him?" "You let your daughter sleep in her own room? What if a man climbed through the window?" etc.

These fears pop into our brains so easily, they seem almost real. But they're not. Our crime rate today is back to what it was when gas was 29 cents a gallon, according to The Christian Science Monitor. It may feel like kids are in constant danger, but they are as safe (if not safer) than we were when our parents let us enjoy the summer outside, on our own, without fear of being arrested. 

But because some busybody thought she knew more about this girl's safety than the girl's own mother, a family has been separated. Harrell is in jail and the child is in the custody of the Department of Social Services. If only the girl had spent her whole summer sitting in McDonald's—surfing the internet and eating a Big Mac instead of playing outside and getting fresh air—this never would have happened.


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## Blondilocks

Am very familiar with North Augusta and wouldn't think twice of letting a 9 year old play in a park. 

Many parents let their child wander around a mall or play arcade games. Kids can be abducted anywhere.

It is sad when the neighborhood seems safe and the child is in the company of others that this situation can happen.


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## mablenc

I think the problem is she had no babysitter, was she planing on sending the girl to the park everyday she had to work?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ScarletBegonias

I personally wouldn't be ok with letting my son be at the park all day alone unless it was right across the street or something like that. Even then I'd still make him text me every 20-30 mins to confirm he's ok. I don't think the mom should have been arrested for this though. Obviously she's struggling and needs help rather than a prison record. Maybe the parent who called the police can afford to be at the park with his/her children but this mom obviously can't. Maybe instead of calling the police,that parent could have offered to keep an eye on the girl instead. Do unto others.


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## Blondilocks

It sounds like a catch-22. If the mother could afford a babysitter, she probably wouldn't be working at McD's. A sad situation.


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## mablenc

I know here in the US most states have vouchers for day care for low income families. I wouldn't let my child alone unsupervised, but I realize it may be the need for income that put the mother I that position. Putting her in jail only makes her situation worse and for he child. There has to be other ways of intervention, besides ripping the family apart.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Blondilocks

Why the officer didn't take the child to the mother and advise her of future consequences is puzzling. It seems a warning could have been issued.


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## richie33

My mother should be doing life in jail. We we're outside all day as kids.


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## Theseus

mablenc said:


> I know here in the US most states have vouchers for day care for low income families.


Is there even such thing as day care for 9 year-olds?



> _I wouldn't let my child alone unsupervised_,


That seems a bit extreme. At 9 years old, children should be able to stretch their wings a bit. Walk to school alone, bike to the local park and stay there for a few hours, walk to the corner store. That's what we did as kids, and statistically crime was more rampant then. Add the fact that kids have cell phones now, which makes things are much safer than before.


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## mablenc

Theseus said:


> Is there even such thing as day care for 9 year-olds?
> 
> 
> 
> That seems a bit extreme. At 9 years old, children should be able to stretch their wings a bit. Walk to school alone, bike to the local park and stay there for a few hours, walk to the corner store. That's what we did as kids, and statistically crime was more rampant then. Add the fact that kids have cell phones now, which makes things are much safer than before.


There is up to the age of 12, I wonder why she didn't leave her at home instead.


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## imtamnew

She must have left the kid at church....kids have always been safe there.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## mablenc

Theseus said:


> Is there even such thing as day care for 9 year-olds?
> 
> 
> 
> That seems a bit extreme. At 9 years old, children should be able to stretch their wings a bit. Walk to school alone, bike to the local park and stay there for a few hours, walk to the corner store. That's what we did as kids, and statistically crime was more rampant then. Add the fact that kids have cell phones now, which makes things are much safer than before.


While I agree about letting them stretch their wings, it's a long stretch to me to leave my son while I work in a park. I actually have my son in an after school program that allows 14 year olds in special situations. While I sure hope my son doesn't need it, at least I know there's a place for him. 

My son has Aspergers so I'm not sure when he would be ready to be alone.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## clipclop2

That's just sad. That mom must be traumatized. 

Im tam, that was hilarious!!!!


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## Wiltshireman

A massive over reaction to what used to be normality.

How things must have changed in the last 40 years.

At the age of nine I walked myself the 2 miles to school each morning (normally early enough for a pickup game of football on the playground before first bell). 

Had to be home from school in time for tea (5pm allowed time for a quick skinny dip in the river on a sunny day).

On a Saturday morning a troupe of kids would scurry into town to the cinema for the morning picture show their pocket money ready to buy a bag of popcorn, then home for lunch and then out again to enjoy time with our friends. Sunday for us was THE family day, church in the morning, big roast dinner, time to catch up with homework in the afternoon.

During the school holiday we would either be out and about with our mates or around each others homes / gardens. As long as Mum knew what meals you were eating where there was not a problem.

IMHO with the exception of the roads being so much busier now the actual danger levels are no higher and should an emergency arise they now have a mobile phone to call for assistance where as we just had a coin for the payphone.

I have a nine year old son ATM and although he is allowed the same level of independence (all though we do ferry him in  the car to & from most events that I at the same age would have walked / rode a bike to) he usually chooses to stay inside playing on the computer / game station either at home or at a friends.


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## DoF

This counties pussification continues.

Would I do what she did? Probably not, but if I had no choice....no big deal.

When I was 8 I was already taking 2 city buses/1 hour each way to and back from school.....in a 1 million population city.

I survived and did JUST fine. If anything it taught me A LOT.

To put someone in jail for that is just completely stupid/ridicules. I'm sorry.

Fact that this country is SO caught up in selling fear to public doesn't help. And it doesn't help that people actually allow to be brainwashed.

EVERYTHING is a risk and danger is at EVERY corner. If someone wants to take your kids they can take the parent out pretty easily anyways.....

Silly goose


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## tom67

DoF said:


> This counties pussification continues.
> 
> Would I do what she did? Probably not, but if I had no choice....no big deal.
> 
> When I was 8 I was already taking 2 city buses/1 hour each way to and back from school.....in a 1 million population city.
> 
> I survived and did JUST fine. If anything it taught me A LOT.
> 
> To put someone in jail for that is just completely stupid/ridicules. I'm sorry.
> 
> Fact that this country is SO caught up in selling fear to public doesn't help. And it doesn't help that people actually allow to be brainwashed.
> 
> EVERYTHING is a risk and danger is at EVERY corner. If someone wants to take your kids they can take the parent out pretty easily anyways.....
> 
> Silly goose


They think the kids are property of the state.:iagree::iagree:


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## Lloyd Dobler

DoF said:


> This counties pussification continues.
> 
> Would I do what she did? Probably not, but if I had no choice....no big deal.
> 
> When I was 8 I was already taking 2 city buses/1 hour each way to and back from school.....in a 1 million population city.
> 
> I survived and did JUST fine. If anything it taught me A LOT.
> 
> To put someone in jail for that is just completely stupid/ridicules. I'm sorry.
> 
> *Fact that this country is SO caught up in selling fear to public doesn't help. And it doesn't help that people actually allow to be brainwashed.*
> 
> EVERYTHING is a risk and danger is at EVERY corner. If someone wants to take your kids they can take the parent out pretty easily anyways.....
> 
> Silly goose


I think you're absolutely correct. Fear sells in the media, so the media is going to keep putting fear online, in magazines, on TV, wherever it suits their needs.

I used to argue about this kind of stuff with my wife. Like a lot of others here, when I was young I basically left home on weekend mornings or during the summer to either walk or ride my bike to my friend's houses. I was home for dinner, but we had freedom to go pretty much anywhere we wanted to. It was the same for my wife, yet because of all the sensationalism on TV she felt she needed to be ultra careful with our kids while I felt otherwise.

Were there child kidnappers, rapists, and murderers back when I was growing up? Of course, but the media didn't publicize them like they're so fond of doing now. 

It's the irrational fear of WHAT MIGHT HAPPEN that's driving a lot of parent's decisions now, and I think it's sad. It's only compounded by the utter ridiculousness of law enforcement and general perceptions in the public.


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## Runs like Dog

But saying that back in the day things were different is a weak argument. This is here and now, today. This is the world we live in. When we were little we did all sorts of insane things no one would do today.


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno

If someone has the time to be so concerned and hanging out at the park, why not just offer to watch the girl for the summer? What's so burdensome about a 9 year old? Give them a sandwich, a park, a cup for water and they're good to go. 

Oh, but offering to watch someone's kid for free, now that would raise an eyebrow for sure. You'd be called a potential molestor/pervert/creep, something would be wrong with you. You could be arrested.

Argh.


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## PhillyGuy13

So annoying. Here's a mom doing her damnedest to raise her child. She could have stayed home, laid back and collected any forms of government assistance. Instead she got a job. 

So she leaves her nine year old alone in the park, to play. The greatest decision? Probably not. But it's not like she left her in a car all day while she was inside a casino.

So what do we do? Throw her in jail, like a common criminal. Spend taxpayer money on her prosecution and confinement. Now she's got a criminal record. Good luck finding a job to support your kid now. Luckily you and I are there to provide taxpayer assistance to her.

PS More money spent in putting the nine year old in foster care. 

The whole system is F--ked. Up.


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## changedbeliefs

When I was ~10-11, I used to hop on my bike, ride neighborhood and main traffic town roads and trails, I would guess 2-3 miles, to my Little League field. Equipped with about $2, I could grab a hot dog and some candy (rarely a drink, and I didn't die from dehydration!) and would spend probably 2-3 hours watching whatever games were going on. No cell phone, no pager, no pay phone at the field (well, I guess somewhere there may have been), and I returned when I felt like it.

Friends of ours moved to London a few years ago, her kids were something like 8 and 10? There was a park across the street, but I gleaned that it wasn't 'wide open' like she could glance at any point and locate them. She said all the kids are just sent outside on a non-school day and they vanish into the park, among each other, the playground, etc..., and play all day, and then come home at some point (pre-set time, I assume).

Make no mistake, the problem in this news story, is 'Murica.


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## DoF

Runs like Dog said:


> But saying that back in the day things were different is a weak argument. This is here and now, today. This is the world we live in. When we were little we did all sorts of insane things no one would do today.


This is true

As a "free range" child, I got myself into WAY too much trouble and lot of it could've been avoided, but my parents simply didn't care enough to spend time with us....so it was what it was.

But I don't let my kids to be free range either. Not much good came from that.

However, I do like a nice middle ground between the 2 extremes.


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## Philat

I think one difference between now and back in the day is that in the past the horrible events received extensive publicity only if prominent people were involved (Lindbergh kidnapping, Lizzie Borden, Leopold and Loeb, Sam Sheppard, Manson Family, etc.). They were regarded as appalling deviations from the norm.

Nowadays, especially with social media, these horrible events get massive coverage no matter who is involved--the victims could be any one of us (Etan Patz, Adam Walsh, Jaycee Dugard, Columbine, Sandy Hook), making them seem less remote and more of an immediate threat to everyone. Hence the (over) reactions. Like a 10-year-old getting suspended from school for pointing his finger like a gun:

Boy points finger like gun, gets suspended | The Columbus Dispatch


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## Theseus

Runs like Dog said:


> But saying that back in the day things were different is a weak argument. This is here and now, today. This is the world we live in. When we were little we did all sorts of insane things no one would do today.


That's true - but so many things make us safer now. Everyone has a cell phones. There are surveillance cameras everywhere. Violent crime is way down, etc.


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## Sbrown

This reinforces the fact that your children do not belong to you but to the state.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## RandomDude

This is... disturbing to say the least =/


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## NextTimeAround

Jaycee dugard was 8 years old waiting for the school bus in front of her house when she was tasered by her captor of 20 years.

In her memoirs, she noted that her captor had missed at least 2 sessions of court appointed counseling just before he kidnapped her. And the state never thought to look into this.



> This reinforces the fact that your children do not belong to you but to the state.


So, umm yeah, interesting ironies. It looks like the State doesn't do its job very well either.

It also makes me wonder what of regulations there regarding tasers.


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## Maricha75

*smh* The arguments that "we all did this back in the day..." don't ring true for me. While I did play outside in our yard all day without mom or dad out there every second, I did NOT go to the park without supervision, and certainly was not dropped off while mom and dad worked all day. I agree that the mom should have been given a warning for dropping her daughter off all day, but I agree with Scarlet. I would not be ok with my kids being at the park unless it was across the street or right next door, where I could check up on them periodically. And, if unable to afford a sitter on her own, she should look into having a friend or relative care for her. Those vouchers mentioned earlier in the thread extend to friends/family caring for the children, too.


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## Boricha

Leave a 9 year old girl at the park while at work? Not in a million years. What's a cell phone going to do if someone snatches her? 

I hope it was a lesson for the mom to make better choices.


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## imtamnew

And what is a petite mother going to do against a hardened con.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Theseus

Boricha said:


> Leave a 9 year old girl at the park while at work? Not in a million years. What's a cell phone going to do if someone snatches her?


So in your view, 9 year-old children can never go to the park or wander from the house without an adult?

That's one reason why kids are so obese today. 

And no one can really "snatch" a 9 year-old at a public park with lots of witnesses around. Anyway, the vast majority of child abductions are by non-custodial parents or some other relative.


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## Scannerguard

I agree with most here - very unlikely with abduction. . . but what about just the 9 year being a little "cretin" all day - begging for food from the other moms, maybe bullying your child, doing vandalism?

Hardly a societal menace, but maybe a small nuisance?

I am not saying she should be jailed though. . .I am outraged as a taxpayer.


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## EnjoliWoman

It's a shame the mother is in jail - as most said, not the best decision. The article only says "for a few hours" not all day - the length of time is unclear. Perhaps she expected to go get her at lunch time, etc.? Or only worked part-time?

Regardless she felt she was in a bind. She was trying at least. I can respect the fact she had a job and that the child preferred playing in the park with other kids. The article doesn't say the child was a menace.

As a 9 y/o, I played in the woods, at the edge of a river with steep banks, or walk to the nearest neighbor 1.5 miles away and would be gone for hours during the summer. My older sister was at home but she is handicapped and likely wouldn't be able to do more than call for help but since I was a quarter of a mile away out of sight and yelling distance, again, unlikely.

Instead I was taught to watch where I stepped to look out for snakes, what to do if I was bitten, what to do if I saw a snake (be still, back away sloooooowly or go around leaving lots of space) and also how to shoot one with a CO2 powered BB gun (pistol style). I was also taught how to swim, to not panic, go along with the current and work my way to the side, etc. My parents PREPARED me instead of protecting me.

I taught my daughter to look both ways when crossing the street, to pay attention to cars and to ride her bike on the sidewalk. I let her ride her bike out of sight down the sidewalk and to the daycare parking lot and made her be sure to come back and check in regularly. I taught her about strangers, safety in numbers/crowds, to scream, etc. There are no guarantees and we love our children but to instill fear will make them afraid to trust - others AND their instincts.

There was also an article about the mother in NYC who left her 9y/o son to ride the subway back home after a shopping trip. She got tons of criticism for it but we all are accustomed to our own environments. So while this may seem horrifying to someone in suburbia, to someone who's child rides the subway every day, has been taught how to read the schedule and maps and has money, subway card, etc. - no big deal. Country kids drive tractors, help with heavy work and big animals. An urban parent might balk in fear at letting a young child ride a large horse bareback or drive a huge tractor pulling a harrow.


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## Miss Taken

Another thing that bothers me about this story is that if I recall correctly, this park had a free and supervised play program every day at that park. 

Of course, the mother should have checked with the counselors running the program first BUT knowing there were adults around watching the kids is probably a reason why the mother let her child play there. 

I feel sorry for the daughter and the mother in this case. I feel like they're being punished for their poverty. I don't think that jail or social services is the better choice, it will cause way more harm than good for the both of them.


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## richardsharpe

Good afternoon all
There was another case yesterday of a mother arrested for letting her kid walk to a park alone.

This is really horrible. You take a family where possibly the mother is allowing her kid to take too many risks, jail the mother and break up the family -with the idea that this is somehow done for the kid's benefit?issed:

Wouldn't simply talking to the parents make more sense? Maybe there should be some legal guidelines?

As other posters have said, when I was 9, I used to ride my bike all over the neighborhood, explore the nearby woods etc. Independence is a very important part of growing up. Do people really want children's first experience of independence to be when they head off to college at 18????


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## imtamnew

This is so funny. Can kids every be kids in America:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AuJ-jXWrb9Q


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## golfergirl

I just don't understand why the mom didn't leave her at home or enroll in the program. Part of the problem I find isn't that the 9 year old is just playing, but usually at that age they need to be able to check in with an adult. They want a snack, they are thirsty, they don't know where bathrooms are.... She must have been reaching out to parents at the playground for these needs to even land on someone's radar that she was alone. Perhaps she got hurt and that is how people noticed. Would she have had access to her mom in case of emergency or was she 100% on her own should an emergency arise? There is a difference between a group of your friends playing on their own riding bikes and exploring with a parent available if need be and a kid left completely to their own devices. I don't think the mom deserved jail but I don't think that was a good judgement call.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## NextTimeAround

As far as a tax on society...... wouldn't the cost of daycare for the child be cheaper than incarceration for the mother.

oh yes, that's right, jails are being privatised and they need constant warm bodies to justify their existence........ (and to jistify their charges to the state/ government for services rendered.......)


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## richardsharpe

Good afternoon golfergirl
I think children vary a lot in their maturity. I also don't know anything about the "park". If it had lots of adults and children it might have been completely safe for a child on their own. Hard to know if she really needed help from an adult, or a busybody saw here. 



golfergirl said:


> I just don't understand why the mom didn't leave her at home or enroll in the program. Part of the problem I find isn't that the 9 year old is just playing, but usually at that age they need to be able to check in with an adult. They want a snack, they are thirsty, they don't know where bathrooms are.... She must have been reaching out to parents at the playground for these needs to even land on someone's radar that she was alone. Perhaps she got hurt and that is how people noticed. Would she have had access to her mom in case of emergency or was she 100% on her own should an emergency arise? There is a difference between a group of your friends playing on their own riding bikes and exploring with a parent available if need be and a kid left completely to their own devices. I don't think the mom deserved jail but I don't think that was a good judgement call.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


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## SurpriseMyself

Runs like Dog said:


> But saying that back in the day things were different is a weak argument. This is here and now, today. This is the world we live in. When we were little we did all sorts of insane things no one would do today.


That's an even weaker argument. What will the kids of today say in 30 years? Remember when we were allowed to walk around the corner to our friend's house in a group with our mom's texting so that they knew we were safe at all times?

How far is this going to go? I work with a woman who won't let her 12 year old bike farther than around their block. And she looks down on any parent who doesn't do the same. That's the real issue here. Parents are so worried all the time that they think everyone they don't know is some predator, pedophile, murderer. People really haven't changed so much in a single generation; but our fear of others certainly has.


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## chillymorn

every kid gets a trophy, can't hurt anybody's feeling, drive our kids to the bus stop, laws about when its too cold for kids to wait at the bus stop, etc,etc,etc

when are they going to arrest a parent for letting their child play on the internet without parental controls. 

make pot legal by outlaw soda pop!

this country is a$$backwards


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## Entropy3000

No idea if he mother should have been arrested or not. With no background it seems wrong to me but I need more information.

The laws for when it is legal to leave a child unattended, at home or anywhere else vary considerably.

Would I consider a parent leaving a 9 y/o daily in a park irresponsible? I might. I need more information.
The logistics and demographics matter to me. What are the risks? What about the weather? Drugs, gangs, homeless and so on. What are the alternatives? What park? How far is the child from the parent? Is the place of work just steps away? How far is the child from the home? How many hours again?

The devil is in the details. It is nice to have a Norman Rockwell view of things. Do I think there are more dangers today than ever? Well I think so. But we used to live in a very naive society growing up. But it seems there are more earth quakes around the world too. I think I am just more aware. 

I think the mother is in danger of losing her child. Right or wrong. For them to have arrested her there would seem to be additional suspitions. Are these in evidence here? No. Need more information.

Per the story the house was robbed. So how safe was the home? Then again even expensive houses in gated areas get broken into.


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