# Looking for signs of reconcile. Still displays naked



## bobsmith

Per my other post, We have been in therapy for a while and learning that she may suffer from some PTSD type feelings from a rough early childhood and I may have some bipolar tendencies. I think mostly my mood is the biggest issue. However, I explained that there are many times I am really not even mad but sound mad and is scares her. 

We went on a family vaca 1 week ago. She is still doing all the normal things in the house. She is still comfortable being naked in front of me or allows that to occur, and we are working well together, she not shopping for a place to live, etc

However, only a few days ago, we had one of our power talks and she openly communicated that she is DONE and made several very hurtful comments that is hates being around me and plans things around me so I will not get mad and tired of it, etc. 

I have jumped off the deep end working on my issues and already on 5 different meds, etc. I truly feel horrible knowing I am the cause of ALL her stress and anxiety. 

I am trying to watch for signs that she will try to accept me if I work on these issues to see if we can meet in the middle. I am also very confused as to how I should be communicating right now, if at all? Should I just move through nothing but actions to help and improve things or trying talking with her daily? I just don't want to push her away by doing the wrong thing.


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## Zomb

If staying at the house is not working, you should definitely try separation. It doesn’t make any sense to keep with a strategy if it is not working.... Actually, in a way you are making things worst... Suggest separation and settle some rules (i.e. no dating with others, see each other every week or once every two weeks, etc)... Good lock and keep us inform…


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## lifeistooshort

What does she have to do with working on your issues? You should do that for you. Sounds like that was part of the problem, you didn't do it for you so it took your marriage falling apart to motivate you. Leave her alone and put yourself together; she'll either want the improved you or you'll be in a good place for someone else.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## bobsmith

I agree and in either case, I have little choice but to work on my issues. She has a long list of her own but luckily not serious. The HUGE problem in our relationship is she simply will not talk to me unless I sit her down and make a big deal out of it. She has never just said "that pisses me off when you do that" or "that makes me uncomfortable to hear you yell". 

As we are working through therapy, she has noted that I do not want to go in for 1 on 1 time for me. I really was avoiding it because I thought it was going to be about me in which US and HER was the issue. I know, dense is a good word here. I am only now realizing a few things. 

I really think ME will affect US, thus will open HER up.


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