# Only married 2 months!!!



## Guest (Jun 27, 2009)

I need help but I'm not sure if this is the right area for this. My husband and I have been together for 8 years but just got married 2 months ago...we have two beautiful little boys together who are 2 1/2 years and 5 months...I just found out last week that my husband's not sure if he wants to be a couple anymore...He says he still loves me and always will because I gave him the kids and that I'm still his best friend but maybe we're better off as just friends...I'm still 100% in love with him and don't want this to be over especially so soon after the wedding

Now here's our situation...I'm on maternity leave from my part time job and he's unemployed so we're living with my parents who are a strain on the relationship because they think of only themselves and not the kids safety...We're working on getting him a job or something we can do at home to earn money so we can move out on our own but right now it's all four of us in the basement which is like one big room so I'm not 100% comfortable being intimate with the kids sleep in the same room so we've barely done that so it's like we've only been able to have a friendly relationship...he's going to stay until we move out and then work on our relationship more then but I need something that will help now as well...we start date night tomorrow but I have no idea what I'm doing...we both want to try working on our problems because of the kids and because we've been threw so much already

Oh yeah and just some basic information he did cheat on me and we broke up about 4 years ago but we have kinda worked threw that...I have forgiven him but I'm still scared that it'll happen again and I question every text, phone call and email he gets...I can normally keep it under control but his brother is getting a divorce because his girlfriend emailed his wife telling her he's unfaithful and she's mad at my husband because he knew about it and so she's trying to ruin hubby's life as well so she keeps emailing me and texting me telling me he's cheating on me too...I know it's not true because she hates my guts and hubby's but my brain goes into over drive and I end up freaking out thinking what if it's true and I don't know how to stop

Please give me ideas as to what to do to help my marriage before it goes the way of a celebrity's...Sorry this is so long


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## Sandy55 (Jun 3, 2009)

"...._we're living with my parents who are a strain on the relationship because *they think of only themselves*_ ...."

They only were thinking of themselves when they had you, their daughter, and her unemployed boyfriend-turned-husband with TWO small kids move into _*their*_ house?

_Who_ is only _thinking of themselves_? Your PARENTS? 

Did you miss-type? Did your parents move into YOUR house and are now causing issues?


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## Sandy55 (Jun 3, 2009)

"..._he's going to stay until we move out and then work on our relationship more then._.." So he is going to LEAVE you when you move out, and THEN work on the relationship?

Why not work on the relationship it while he is unemployed and not doing anything else, he and you can talk a lot if he isn't working, can't you? 

If he is unemployed, he can care for the KIDS, so [/B]you can go back OFF maternity leave and work one, maybe even TWO jobs[/B].


WHY the heck are you STILL on maternity leave after FIVE months?

You two need to buckle down and you need to get back to work and _quit the relationship gyrations_. 

You have two small children to support, there is naturally going to be stress living in the basement, but hey, that is the ECONOMY right now! If she keeps calling your cell, dump the cell, and use your parent's phone when you need it to CALL about a job...you could save money not having a cell phone because texting costs MONEY.


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## Guest (Jun 27, 2009)

I'm in Canada so maternity leave here is a year and it's better in the long run right now because my work has no extra hours for any of the part timers

My parents think of themselves when they leave knives and cigerettes where ever they want in the kids reach when we've asked them to leave them where the kids can't reach and when they stand at the top of the stairs while the kids are sleeping and drink and eat the food we get for my son so he can eat....we don't care when it coes to ourstuff and whatever we only ask that they think of the kids

I did mistype when I put he's going to stay till we move out...I ment once we move out and if things still aren't working for us a few months later then we're going to take another look at whether it's a good idea to still be together or seperate as friends

Came here looking for things that could help my marriage and get support not get freaked out at when we're doing everything we can do to provide the best for thesebabies...also I'm breastfeeding so I'll take the time to provide that for my baby


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## Guest (Jun 27, 2009)

oh yeah and we have the basic plans so that if he is out and something happens to the kids then I can get ahold of him...the only things we've added are unlimited incoming calls and unlimited text which is $20


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