# I need help ASAP, I feel myself going under



## tlcnotathome (Jul 10, 2013)

Dated: 1 1/2 years
Married: 8 1/2 years
No children together
Both children from previous marriages
Divorced since Sept of 2012

We always had a rocky marriage. I am his 3rd marriage (red flag).

I will try to be short but to the point. His child was always in trouble with the law and very disrespectful to me. This put a lot of pressure on our relationship. He is an alcoholic and has used different drugs. He has always loved to stay in bars and run with different women. That is why I divorced him.
Since the divorce he has texted, came to my house, left pictures on my car during the night. We started to see one another on a regular basis and he promised him new what he had lost and would do everything in his power to correct all his mistakes. Come to find out while he was talking and seeing me, I found out that he was talking and seeing another girl. I am hurt, torn, can't eat, and can’t sleep. I feel myself going down and cannot seem to pull out. I go to bed thinking of this and get up thinking of what he has done again and I allowed it to happen.

I found out the girl he was talking to had a boyfriend of 6 years and I exposed the relationship to the boyfriend. The boyfriend is heartbroken as well. What is so crazy, I'm trying to help the boyfriend and I am in worse shape than he is. At least he can function.

Recently I have tried to date other people and I am miserable once I'm with another person.So I just stopped all together. I do not do anything but go to work.

My ex is a narcissist and he knew just want to do to make you feel special when he desired to. I miss the good moments with him. We did everything together. He was out of work for 4 1/2 years for back injuries and he had a lot of time to play while I was at work.

I can't stand the thoughts of losing him for good to another women. I want what she is getting all the attention and love from him. I know this sounds like I'm a crazy person for loving someone so bad. I try to tell my heart and mind, but it is not working. How can a man say he loves you and then turns around and trying to sleep and see another women?

There is so much in my head I can not think straight. I feel myself slipping away. I want this pain to go away. I have lost 6 pounds in one week. I get sick with the thoughts of food right now. 

What I hate he walks around happy as can be while I'm left with all the heartache. I have really tried to keep this marriage and I failed.

Please Help!


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

Have you looked into counseling to figure out why you're willing to put up with this? The problem isn't his behavior. He's an ass. He'll always be an ass. The problem is you let him treat you like dirt, and then you go back for more. 

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## tlcnotathome (Jul 10, 2013)

Yes, I seen someone for months and it did not help. I have been on depression meds and that did not seem to help. I have talked to my pastor and everyone said the same thing. Get over him, he's not worth it. I do not drink or have never done drugs. His morals are alot different than my.


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## doubletrouble (Apr 23, 2013)

Your pastor and friends are right, although that's not what you wanted to hear, and that's why you fight it. 

It's a horrible position to be in, and it eats at your self worth in BIG chunks. You have to believe that although you aren't perfect (none of us are), you are surely worth having someone in your heart who believes you ARE. 

Always remember that. Say it to yourself as a mantra. "I am worth loving!"


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## toblkflys (Jun 28, 2013)

I know just how you are feeling. I just found out 2 weeks ago and she doesn't want to try a R. We've been together for 10 years and it's all been a lie. 
I too can't eat, sleep, think straight or do anything. I work from home and so I have a hard time doing that. My life has been crushed. I want to die.
I wish I had some words of wisdom for you, but all I can do is relate to the pain. I just want it to stop.
I'm going to see a therapist today. I'm already on antidepressants and they aren't helping.
I wish you well, I really do. I hope we can both pull ourselves out of this.


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## tlcnotathome (Jul 10, 2013)

Well it has been an mth since any contact with the ex. His girlfriend that he is currently seeing came into the store where I'm working part time. She made it a point to let me know that she was going to my ex-husbands house. Her ex-boyfriend is still trying to deal with this destruction. Her ex-boyfriend said he was just trying to hold on to the 15 year friendship they once shared.

I'm still unable to eat. I have already lost 8lbs and still cannot sleep. I had a breakdown during the weekend. I hate feeling like this. I am a very outgoing person and love the outdoors. I have no ambition to do anything.

I have been adding false pictures and posting life is great on facebook, just to not let my ex have the satisfaction of me being miserable without him.

I have had mine and my ex's friends talk to me and tell me, "Girl you have been through the ringer with your ex". They know I was living in h*** all these years. I can say for myself I hung in there and really tried.

For those of you, who have been cheated on, please be aware they never change. If you choose to R, you have already allowed the door to be open to cheating and that door will never be closed. It is most likely they will cheat again.


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