# Depression is caused by cognitive distortion. Examples within



## YupItsMe (Sep 29, 2011)

*Cognitive distortions can cause depression. Examples within*

EDIT: Changed title for clarification. See above

And they are all ridiculous. I have given examples of cognitive distortions that someone might think. 

Remember after reading them, they can and very often do cause depression. If you "think" what I "wrote" you are "distorting cognitions" and therefore putting yourself in possible jeopardy of depressing yourself. 

You need to learn how to fix that to become and remain happy again.

All-or-nothing thinking - "Nobody will ever like me", "I always say something stupid" "Ill never be happy" "Ill never find anyone nice" "All the good ones are gone"

Overgeneralization – After making an isolated mistake thinking "Im a total failure"

Mental filter – After an average appetizer, awesome entre, delicious wine and lousy desert thinking "that meal sucked." After enjoying a movie but with stale popcorn thinking "why cant I have any fun"

Disqualifying the positive – "Sure it worked out this time but it wont last"

Jumping to conclusions – "Did you hear much noise that baby was making inside the airport. I just know this flight is going to suck"

Mind reading –" i know she thinks Im terrible"

Fortune telling – "There is no way this is going to go well. I just know it."

Magnification and minimization – "They are so awesome and I totally suck. I dont stand a chance"

Catastrophizing – "I know if I do that Ill be hated forever"

Emotional reasoning – "I dont feel confident about whats to come so it wont be good"

Should statements – "She should have called me first. Who does she think she is."

Labeling and mislabeling – "They are so cheap they wouldnt offer a crumb to a starving child in the street if they had just come from a ten course meal with a king and had leftovers spilling out of every pocket"

Personalization – "Its my fault she got in that accident. I should have told her not to go"

Narcissistic rage - "Did you see how she looked at me. Who the hell does she think she is"

Here is my slogan for depression (Depression: You do it to yourself)


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## Arnold (Oct 25, 2011)

*Re: Depression ius caused by cognitive distortion. Examples within*

Good stuff.


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## Arnold (Oct 25, 2011)

Sounds true, as well. Guess they are not mutually exclusive.


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## NoIssues (Oct 9, 2011)

wifeofhusband said:


> Depression is also caused by physical medical issues (thyroid, adrenals, hormones, for example). It is also caused by situational factors that need addressing (and that someone may need help identifying and with knowing what options are available to them).
> 
> Depression can be and often is caused by distorted cognitions alone
> 
> ...


In your case, I agree that changing the situation will help but others have entirely different issues. Secondly I disagree you couldnt benefit from thinking differently or you wouldnt still be there.

Distorting cognitions that all by itself can and often does cause depression and learning how to stop doing so alone is a well known cure when that is the sole underlying issue. That sort of case is very common.


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## YupItsMe (Sep 29, 2011)

Glad to see some interest in the subject. 

Certainly didnt mean to imply cognitive distortion, aka irrational thinking, exaggerated thinking and logical fallacies

1. always cause depression
2. are the always the sole cause of depression

I appreciate the other valid thoughts posted. 

Clearly there are a number of causes of depression but I believe it is very common to suffer from depression from distorted cognitions alone and it can be cured without medication which I am a big fan of. 

I also believe it is the most common cause of depression in a difficult marital situation and therefore the most relevent to the forum. 

Thanks all.


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## YupItsMe (Sep 29, 2011)

wifeofhusband said:


> I know someone who suffers anxiety caused by cognitive distortion alone but would never arrive at this conclusion without a holistic assessment.


There are plenty of self help success stories of those suffering depression caused by CD that also have little faith or dont have a budget or patience for professonal intervention. 

There are others that tried the professional route and were sorely disappointed after being ripped off of thousands of dollars and delaying their feeling better until they escaped the grip off professionals pocket padding methods due to the weekly, biweekly and monthly schedule common to the industry. 

There are other professionals that do advocate solution based brief therapy that I have more respect for. I might recommend giving that a go since the impact can be evaluated quickly minimizing any wasted time or often limited funds.


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## YupItsMe (Sep 29, 2011)

wifeofhusband said:


> On what basis do you think it is the most common factor? Genuinely interested.


1. Having read several posts on several forums where Ive read CDs in black and white, having a habit of using the new post function on all forums and having a habit of noting which section the threads come from Ive had a strong feel that Cds are the most common cause of depression related to marital and romantic diffculties

2. Conversations with friends and family that have gone thru marital issues making statements that were clearly CDs

3. Personal experience recovering from depression due to CDs

4. Exhaustive reading on the subject

5. Conversations with several close friends that are involved in counseling of various capacities


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## YupItsMe (Sep 29, 2011)

For the benefit of a serious subject and because this forum is anonymous, Ill disclose what I was hesitant to let go earlier. 

I suffered from depression about six years ago for about 9 months. Went to my physician, and tried two anti=depressants neither of which worked and both of which made me lathargic. I went to two different counselors both of which were quacks. 

Then I read "Feeling Good" learned about CDs and was largely cured almost immediately and was completely cured within about six months. At the three month mark there was almost no sign of depressive episodes and my depression was toast after six months. 

I have since recognized and taught the concepts to many friends that I recognized were depressed. 

I can see them and hear them from ten thousand miles away since they were so rampant in my own thinking. 

It started with a lawsuit against the government that has stacked the deck and cost me over one hundred thousand dollars to prosecute and I eventaully won. 

The stress caused the CDs initially but eventually they took over most of my thinking because they become habits that you have to break to lift the depression. 

Understanding them alone from reading about them brought me to my knees with tears of joy because I knew I found MY cure for MY problem with depression. 

It was real bad lying on the sofa not going outdoors for a week at a time several times and its been real good for over five years. 

As I said eariler, I can see them and hear them like they have a bugle corp marching in every time one is uttered.


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## YupItsMe (Sep 29, 2011)

wifeofhusband said:


> Recognizing and reasoning on CDs would be a useful addition to school curriculum IMO (as a short course or workshop at older ages).


Bravo for that awesome idea. :smthumbup:

Imagine how much suffering that could relieve from these poor kids in high school. 

Im going to think about that and maybe take some action barking up the right tree. Id want to do what I call a big mouth campaign to media outlets to get press coverage and a ground swell. 

You have me thinking now uh oh. :rofl: I could really get into doing something with that. 

My daughter is ten, brilliant and makes dealing with bullies look like tiddly winks but some of her poor peers and older friends have it bad and they distort bigtime alot. 

It scares the hell out of me.


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## raising5boyz (Nov 8, 2008)

Ok...so now that y'all are done bickering about this and made friends with each other.....lol....just playing, don't yell at me! :rofl:

for real.....my mouth dropped to the floor when I read about this cognitive distortion thing! That is so so so so me! Scary! Help me! What is the best info out there about this? I am depressed...have been for a while on and off...it's pretty dang bad right now....and I want to feel better NOW! 

I was on anti-depressants for a while....hated them! Basically made me feel like...eh whatever...about life. No lows...but certainly no highs either! At all!

My situation now....very high stress and nothing I can do to change the really high stresses (raising 5 boys as a single mother going to school full time with extremely low income!).

Thanks in advance for your help!


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## YinPrincess (Jul 31, 2011)

Without having read the responses... One would think that thinking these things does not cause, but are actually caused BY depression?

I wouldn't think these thoughts when I am "well" - but when I am depressed I do... (Just an observation)...
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## YupItsMe (Sep 29, 2011)

raising5boyz said:


> What is the best info out there about this?


Quickest way is to Google "cognitive distortion" and read a dozen entries to get a firm grasp of what you are saying to yourself that is causing depression. 

Be mindful cognitive distortion is also called irrational thought, exaggerated thought and logical fallacy.

The idea is you are in essence lying to yourself and belieiving it creating hopelessness and depression. You can learn how to stop doing this as follows

1. Learn to recognize them (you will be amazed how easy it is to start doing this UNTIL you learn see them coming)
2. Learn how to alter them back to reality

For example, you have a flat tire in a snow storm running late for Christmas dinner 

"I cant even enjoy Christmas. My life will always be the pits" is a cognitive distortion off the top of my head. It is untrue, It is an exaggeration but a depressing thought to that your life will always be the pits and you cant enjoy christmas becaue of an inconvence. 

This distorted thinking changes to accurate thinking "well I have some unfortunate difficulty to get thru at the moment and that is inconvenient for sure but this too shall pass and ill be on my way to friends and family. Leftovers are also delicious"

The bookstore psychology and self help areas specifically looking for "depression" and "anxiety". Look for the word "cognitive"

The book that started it all for me is called "Feeling Good" and has many excercises and examples to teach you how to stop them dead in their tracks and replace them with rational thinking that is not depressing. Its very powerful. 

I have since read many more books and google entries but it was well worth it to take care of my self and to follow up by helping others. 

I wish you all the best


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## YupItsMe (Sep 29, 2011)

YinPrincess said:


> Without having read the responses... One would think that thinking these things does not cause, but are actually caused BY depression?
> 
> I wouldn't think these thoughts when I am "well" - but when I am depressed I do... (Just an observation)...
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Its well established they CAUSE depression. Not always and not always alone but a very large number of cases all by themselves they can make you functionless.

I recall months of ZERO interest in doing ANYTHING while experiencing NO JOY. Sleeping was the only relief for me. It was god awful. 

It is also well established stopping them CURES depression. Not always but the success rate remarkably high.


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## YupItsMe (Sep 29, 2011)

I didnt notice this deeply bothersome post yesterday and need to comment and clarify the many errors in it and the large amount of damage it does to those suffering from depression. 

This post by the way is from someone who admits they have NO personal experience with depression or curing it thru self help AFTER professional intervention FAILED MISERABLY. NONE NADA ZERO, Thats the admission whether true or false.



wifeofhusband said:


> it bothers me on behalf of those who suffer depression when I read that if they would just change their thinking, all would be well.
> 
> Its very unfortunate you dismiss a proven cure since there is plenty of evidence that it works exactly as you have dismissed it. But you left out the important part which is ... When they change their distortion thinking to reality based thinking the depression lifts. Your oversimplification misses that key distinction entirely.
> 
> ...


No it isnt like being told to snap out of it at all. Both of the last two statements are a gross and cynical over-simplification of a massive body of work called Cognitive Therepy that is well proven to be very effective treating depression single handedly without other treatment methods applied. 

Its being told their is a path to recovery that can be rather rapid, inexpensive, self help and free of prescription drugs which many find the side effects to be worse than the illness. 

Socondly the infuriating and in my view unforgiveable disservice you are doing to those SUFFERING from depresion with your preference for what you call "evidence based practice" while minimizing what you call my apparantly lame in your eyes "anecdotal evidence" is you are 

UNNECESSARILY STEEPENING THE MOUNTAIN OF RECOVERY 

for those that need to be reassured their pain and suffering can very possibly be cured by learning and understanding whats going on with them. 

Making anything sound more difficult than neccesary to a depressive prolongs suffering and delays them addressing their illness because a hallmark of depression is lethargy and lacking the initiative to follow thru because of feelings of hopelessness. 

Your cynical post adds to the very feelings that further demotivate a depressive from addressing their illness sooner rather than later.

Even though my comments are NOT based solely on anecdotal evidence since I have read countless scientific studies on the subject your dismissive comment flies in the face of this very site since 98% of the advice given here is based on anecdotial experience. 

You cant participate here comfortably in good faith embracing anecdotal evidence in nearly every thread on the forum and then dismiss anecdotal evidence as flawed only when discussing depression while endorsing it everywhere else on the forum. 

Please stop poisoning the thread with cynical inaccuracy from a personal bias with no personal experience. It doesnt help. In fact it hurts the point since it is inaccurate and demotivates depressives from seeking out relief with a sound direction based on empiracle AND significant anecdotal evidence.


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## YupItsMe (Sep 29, 2011)

wifeofhusband said:


> please also acknowledge other factors so those suffering can really get to their own root cause (or causes)


I have. 

Your valuable contributions clarified and added to the quality of the thread immensely and are very much appreciated except where I took specific exception to bothersome statements for reasons stated. 

I understand we both have the same intent to help others relieve their suffering. 

Largely we are having a heated agreement in some places and arguing about math and method of proof in others 

Distorting cognitions can be a slippery slope to watch for and can lead to severe depression with or without other factors present and can also be fixed by learning about them and restoring thinking back to reality based thought.

To be clear about the level of care I am committed to here, I have gone back and edited that which you found most bothersome. Again, I thank you for making the thread much more useful and thorough. Its been rather invigorating getting it more precisely as you and I would want it to say the least.


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## YinPrincess (Jul 31, 2011)

YupItsMe said:


> Its well established they CAUSE depression. Not always and not always alone but a very large number of cases all by themselves they can make you functionless.
> 
> I recall months of ZERO interest in doing ANYTHING while experiencing NO JOY. Sleeping was the only relief for me. It was god awful.
> 
> It is also well established stopping them CURES depression. Not always but the success rate remarkably high.


I wonder what causes the thoughts... And to what extent are these thoughts 'normal'? I do a lot of mental self-correcting now, but I've always had thoughts like these, especially when I'm down.

Thanks for the info... This has been a VERY interesting read! 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## YupItsMe (Sep 29, 2011)

YinPrincess said:


> I wonder what causes the thoughts... And to what extent are these thoughts 'normal'? I do a lot of mental self-correcting now, but I've always had thoughts like these, especially when I'm down.
> 
> Thanks for the info... This has been a VERY interesting read!
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Youre so welcome. Im glad its helpful for you. 

I dont know yet. I will ask you some questions to see if we can jolt a sound explanation out of one of us since I dont have time to research it. 

First off they are prevalent in society so we do hear others say them often. Some are cliches for crying out loud. 

Do you agree we want to avoid disappointment so we talk down our expectations to ZERO when we do this? 

Clearly lowering expectations is a method of enjoying a meal, vacation, party, wedding. The reverse is also true. If our expectations are too high, we are "setting ourselves up for disappointment". 

For example, if you expect every day of your vacation to be wonderful weather, you are setting yourself up to be disappointed. 

Thinking "I know we will have lousy weather. I just know it" is common also but is it accurate and why would someone think that? Is it valid? Why is it thought? Is it unconcious disappointment avoidance? 

Why would someone say that? They feel unlucky? They are negative? They watched the weather channel and looked at percentages? 

It seems getting it right is the key to remaining happy. Reality, Accuracy. Good,. Exaggeration. Distortion. Bad.

Wisdom, Serenity and Courage is in there somewhere for balance and reality


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## FrecklesSN (Jun 6, 2011)

Thanks for this post. The examples you gave sound JUST like my husband. Everything is the end of the world when he is upset. His favorite seems to be "I work my ass off all day long and have nothing to show for it!" usually after he can't afford something he wants but doesn't need.


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## tiredandout (Jun 1, 2011)

My husband is the living proof of this cycle: distorted thinking kind of causing depression and depression causing more distorted thinking.

He knows he is depressed, he thinks he is depressed — but he doesn't think it is a disease or that there is anything he could do to it internally. He hates his environment (this town, country, other people, me) for "making him miserable". And, in his bad moments, he doesn't see that he could help it in any way. It seems to me that he is waiting for the environment to turn around and start living up to his expectations — which of course it never will. 

He has better moments too, and sometimes even for a longer time. This has to do with other people pleasing him or something abnormally exciting happening. Apparently I can be of no help though. I am most of the time the one to hurt him and his happiness, my smallest mistake in being there for him makes me a "jerk" and "a bad wife" and amplifies his depression — but me trying to cheer him up, take him out or invite him to things is hardly ever accepted. It seems he doesn't really accept that kind of help from me. I should be all-forgiving all-understanding and always on a good mood. Otherwise I am just causing him unhappiness. Others are treated which more tolerance, their smallest efforts of being good to him make his day. 

I don't know if I'm just doing it wrong. If I really just try to give him the wrong kind of help. I have tried to examine my behavior and don't think I'm trying to tell him to snap out it. I try to offer support and compassion but I do admit that after offering support and compassion for a week or two, and the hopeless thoughts just grow more and more unrealistic — I do try to give him a gentle reminder that some things might not be that bad. But at that points his distortions are gone too far for him to appreciate my kind of thinking.

I know there is no way for me to change him. But there doesn't even seem to be any way for me to hint him of another direction. He hates the way things are but has lost all hope or interest in trying to make them better. 

I am starting to dislike our relationship more and more. He is unhappy and while he is unhappy he doesn't want to allow any happiness for me either. Wish I could just twist that dial on his brain that causes him to only see black or white and show him all the warm shades of gray that I can see.


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## YupItsMe (Sep 29, 2011)

Tired and out.

If he knows he is depressed then buy him a book on curing it.

You should also let him know he needs to help himself or you will have to consider moving on. 

It often takes a serious jolt to get a depressive to help themselves.


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## tiredandout (Jun 1, 2011)

YupItsMe, thanks for your reply.

Well, my husband is not a reader. I know he has read some things on the internet on the subject and done small things to try to help himself (finding things to do or going out with a friend, trying out stress-relief techniques, went to a mindfulness class). However, his interest to doing anything to it doesn't last long, it should be easier for his motivation to last. This is also the reason why getting professional help failed. He did see a doctor, but finding a mental health care specialist that would speak his language simply turned out to be too d4mn difficult in this place (he has moved here for me). 

I guess we are in a rut not only because of his depression but also due to my reaction to it, which is that I have turned into a codependent shadow of a person more than an equal partner. There is more on this in other threads, I am now working on it very hard and making changes to take back the power in my life. 
Anyway, it has that to do with this, that I guess I still cannot honestly tell him that he must work on it or I'll be out. Don't have that kind of confidence yet, I still feel "responsible" and an obligation to take of him.

Well, tonight we talked about it in length and actually he brought up the idea that he might indeed be not just depressed but bipolar. We discussed his past, the cycles of ups and downs he has had, his feelings then and now — and it does seem to hit. He showed some interest in seeing someone about it, but is discouraged by how hard it was the last time he tried. Frankly, so am I. 

The mental health care people here do not let me as his spouse to sign him up for doctors appts. They, and understandably so, want to talk directly to him to understand the issue and be sure they are offering him the help he needs. But he has been too disappointed in the system before to have the energy, since he also he doesn't feel comfortable talking to people on the phone about it and is stressed out they won't fully understand him because of a language barrier. So I don't really know what there is to do. I don't think this is something he can help himself out of alone — not me for that matter — but getting outside help doesn't seem an option at the moment unless something more radical happens in one way or another..


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