# What to do??



## Stampede (May 4, 2012)

First of all, I have been a jealous jerk, have said hateful things, have been COMPLETELY insensitive to what my wife has wanted............

She will not consider recinciliation. I want to, but she does not. What do you do at this point?? Continue with the divorce proceedings?? That is not what I want, but she has obviously moved on. 

I could use some help here......
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## canttrustu (Feb 22, 2012)

When you say youve been a jealous jerk and have been COMPLETELY insensitive....can you explain. Give some examples? Were you unfaithful? Give some details please so we can better respond.


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## wiigirl (Jun 14, 2012)

Unfaithful vs being a jerk.....you can fix being a jerk.









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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

My advice... Take a look at her complaints, and see which ones have merit. Take a look at yourself, and identify what you want to address about yourself as a husband/father/person. Then lay out a plan to start changing those things. Individual counseling, personal development, etc. if she sees the changes, likes them, and believes they'll stick, you have a chance. If not, you'll be in better shape for yourself and your next relationship. 

C
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## Stampede (May 4, 2012)

canttrustu said:


> When you say youve been a jealous jerk and have been COMPLETELY insensitive....can you explain. Give some examples? Were you unfaithful? Give some details please so we can better respond.


Have NOT been unfaithful! I have never looked at another woman the way I look at my wife!!

She is in her early 40's, done having kids, and she has made some changes in her life that have produced a severe amount of anxiety in my life. 

Right, wrong, or indifferent, I have said some things that I wish I could take back. But once it is out of the mouth, its out! 

I truly love this woman and would love to patch things up, but it is apparent, I'm not going to get the chance.
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## kindi (Apr 28, 2012)

She will not consider reconciliation, and divorce proceedings have begun.

There is nothing else you can do but accept that it's over and it's time to move on with your life.

Or, you can stall by contesting different aspects of the divorce such as asset distribution, support, etc.. and try to fix whatever it is about you that she doesn't like and hope she has second thoughts before the court stamps the papers and it's final. 

But don't for a single minute sit there and think she's divorcing you because of a few poorly chosen words you spoke in moments of anger.

That's definitely not it.


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## Stampede (May 4, 2012)

kindi said:


> She will not consider reconciliation, and divorce proceedings have begun.
> 
> There is nothing else you can do but accept that it's over and it's time to move on with your life.
> 
> ...


I'm not going to contest anything. She is a very strong willed woman and knows what she wants. Right now, I am not in the plans. 

There is no one else on either side but we have had a very rough patch over the last eight months. She is wanting to go one direction and I was expecting something else. 

Maybe someday we will reconcile, but I doubt it. Marriage is a one time deal for me. After what has happened, don't know that I could ever get into another relationship.
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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

What was your relationship like prior to 8 month ago?

What effected the dynamics of the marriage 8 month ago?

Were those hateful words spoken recently?


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