# Should I continue with the marriage or call it quits?????



## gurm (Feb 8, 2009)

Sorry because it is going to be a long story. It is twenty years long. We were married 20 years ago and have one daughter 17 years old. I am teetotaller, religious and down to earth person. I had always belived what ever may happen there will be no problem of infidelity in our life. I loved her a lot (still do). It was always she before I. I gifted her a cell phone for her in 1999 when I was not having one. We both are well educated and having good jobs. But suddenly in 2004 I started noticing change in her behaviour. She started avoiding me. I ignored everytime. then one day as I tried to read a sms in her phone she snatched it and deleted it. Later she assured that it was from one of her students. I searched the number and found that it was of her friends and she had not stored the number in her mobile. I checked the call details in the internet and to my astonishment I found she was making on an average 20 calls of almost 2 hours duration to this fellow. She just kept mum. I thought it was a mistake and ignored it. But warned her to stop this. She assured me that it will not be repeated. But once in a while I still kept coming across this persons in her cell. She would assure me that he called but she never answered. On Oct.18 2008 when I was out of city for one night on official work, she invited him for dinner and even tried to brainwash my daughter that your father is very bad and this uncle is very nice. We are not sharing the bed room since the Start of Dec.2008 and she is sleeping in the daughters room. This was enough. ever since i have started telling the common friend what she has done and is still doing. 

two weeks ago when we were alone at home I tried to have sex with here. She told me that she did not felt like having sex with me.

Please advise what to do.


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## Amplexor (Feb 13, 2008)

Obviously the marriage has some serious issues. She has lied and hidden things from you. In answer to your query, no it is not time to end the marriage. It is time to work on it to see if it can be salvaged. Has you wife discussed why she will not have sex? Has she explained the relationship with TOM? Have you discussed counseling? A 20 year marriage deserves some attention and effort before you through in the towel.


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## humpty dumpty (Nov 26, 2008)

To be married for 20 years deserves some effort in repairing , why have things gone wrong and what can you both do to make things better. Can you still comunicate with each other? could you go to counseling!! dont give up so easily


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