# What pushes a guy away? About the chase?



## nikkilaya1234 (Mar 10, 2008)

All guys I've talked to say that it's about the chase. I'm one who puts everything into a relationship and put him first. I've been in only two serious relationships and got hurt both times. With all my boyfriends I get some kind of message waaaayy later saying "you were such a great girlfriend. I was stupid for treating you like I did." It makes me question what I'm doing wrong. This last relationship lasted 2 years. He was awesome the first year. He told me that he was the one who always got hurt by his exes making me the first he was mean to and didn't try with. Is it sex? Does that really push a guy away? It feels like after the first time, things are perfect but the more and more we do it the more and more he doesn't care anymore. It's like he fell out of love with me. 

Guys, how would the perfect relationship go for you from dating up until marriage? What are the dos and don'ts? What makes you say "this is the most perfect girl for me?"


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## draconis (Oct 3, 2007)

Communication is the most important key. You need to have that working first before anything. You can't stop doing the things you fell in love with or get into the rut of taking things for granted. 

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/long-term-success-marriage/1174-what-gave-me-10-years-success.html

the above link might help.

draconis


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## Honey (Sep 2, 2008)

nikkilaya1234 said:


> All guys I've talked to say that it's about the chase. I'm one who puts everything into a relationship and put him first. I've been in only two serious relationships and got hurt both times. With all my boyfriends I get some kind of message waaaayy later saying "you were such a great girlfriend. I was stupid for treating you like I did." It makes me question what I'm doing wrong. This last relationship lasted 2 years. He was awesome the first year. He told me that he was the one who always got hurt by his exes making me the first he was mean to and didn't try with. Is it sex? Does that really push a guy away? It feels like after the first time, things are perfect but the more and more we do it the more and more he doesn't care anymore. It's like he fell out of love with me.
> 
> Guys, how would the perfect relationship go for you from dating up until marriage? What are the dos and don'ts? What makes you say "this is the most perfect girl for me?"


In your next relationship, don't be too fast to dish it out. Girls have spoiled guys in that way. Try your best to really get to know the person first. I know this is hard, because they are so cool in acting good, and telling you things you want to hear. Just don't give out sex to try to hold on to a guy. If he really wants to be with you, you will know it's not just sex he is after.


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## nikkilaya1234 (Mar 10, 2008)

AAAAHHHHH! No way! I never dished it out. We were together for 2 years. It took 3 months of us just hanging out for me to kiss him. He tried 3 times to kiss me and I turned my cheek. Then we started dating. I would never have sex to keep a guy. We were really in love. I was just wondering if it's true: Do guys lose interest after they get what they're all chasing after? We were together for a while before we got that close.


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## draconis (Oct 3, 2007)

nikkilaya1234 said:


> AAAAHHHHH! No way! I never dished it out. We were together for 2 years. It took 3 months of us just hanging out for me to kiss him. He tried 3 times to kiss me and I turned my cheek. Then we started dating. I would never have sex to keep a guy. We were really in love. I was just wondering if it's true: Do guys lose interest after they get what they're all chasing after? We were together for a while before we got that close.


The only guys that would lose interest after having sex with you wouldn't wait for three months to begin with, they'd move on to someone easier (and there are plenty out there.) Just never settle into the mundane.

draconis


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## Honey (Sep 2, 2008)

nikkilaya1234 said:


> AAAAHHHHH! No way! I never dished it out. We were together for 2 years. It took 3 months of us just hanging out for me to kiss him. He tried 3 times to kiss me and I turned my cheek. Then we started dating. I would never have sex to keep a guy. We were really in love. I was just wondering if it's true: Do guys lose interest after they get what they're all chasing after? We were together for a while before we got that close.


Sorry, hun. I didn't mean you are easy. Ok, I should have said maybe other girls shouldn't dress and act like they are. 
Hmmm.. :scratchhead:.. maybe I should just shut up, huh?


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## elscotto (Sep 6, 2009)

So no advice or anything to add here but I notice a lot of regulars that are banned such as Honey right above? Dobo was another--why? Does anyone know?


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