# my husband is jealous of my time without him



## COMEY (Oct 15, 2008)

Thanks for all your replies on this. It has helped me a lot.


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## angela (Oct 15, 2008)

I honestly have been in a simular relationship as you. It is very difficult because human nature has it's differences. I would be very hard for me to give you good advice becaue my re lationship finally ended after a year and a half because he seemed to thinkt that any time I left the house that there was possibility of me cheating or forgetting about him and my son. Now I would never do any such thing but he never would trust me. He thought that I didn't want to spend time with him because I needed a break from my son whom I was with 24 hours a day 7 days a week. I needed time alone to go shoping and talking face to face with friends that I hadn't spoken to in a long time. Eventually he tried to argue with me all the time and I just tried to explain to him insanity means doining the same thing everyday and waiting for something else to happen but it doesn't. this being said, I was going insane with my same daily rutine and I needed a little change in my life. He refused to let me change my rutine so I told him to accept me or walk. To my surprise, he walked. Maybe without giving you husband the choice to choose between the two, just inform him that you go insane with having to do the same things all the time the same way and sometimes you just need time to yourself to relieve the stress. I hope the advice I give to you will help. If your husband cares, he'll understand over time. Hopefully sooner than later for the sake of your family. Good Luck.


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## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

COMEY said:


> He doesnt have any friends online or local so i feel he is jealous of that. I havent had any hobbies since being married. he has encouraged me to have hobbies like he does.


This has been a hard one for my H and I, too. He's more outgoing and im more of a recluse. 

In the beginning of our relationship I'd get so upset if he left. I guess it was because i moved states with him and i had left all my friends and family just to be with him. then he'd go out all night with people from work and id just be stuck in an apartment alone. that was brutual. 

Its taken awhile for us to work on this issue. he eventually quit doing some of the things he loves and now he's miserable. so, i do encourage him to go out and start doing the things he likes. but, it still sucks for me. 

We did a boundaries workbook together to get to a happy medium on this issue. i still dont like it when he goes out without me, but im learning my attitude isnt healthy. so even though i still get upset, in the back of my mind i know im wrong. 

and since doing the boundaries workbook together, he knows he shouldnt feel guilty for doing the things he loves. he will let me know he loves me, but that he's going anyway.

Its a work in progress. I would suggest doing a boundaries workbook together to come to some common ground.


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## justean (May 28, 2008)

i had issues of jealousy with hubby, over my hobbies. jealous of my horse and the time i take and the time im not with with him and me on this forum and phoning my F had to be limited. but at the time i did go on the phone for hours ( but it was after kids in bed).
but put it bluntly i tell him, what about the time hes not with us, or in his workshop, or his time away, oh and his boat.
some of his resentment came from the fact that i work mon- wed and if im ill i get sick pay. H is self employed, but i do understand at times y the constant working. but you stil have to rest.
but i stil have balance. i dont ride on a sat as H works in the am and so far most sats we have taken our children out. infact H works most days a week, but i stil see that as his choice. 
i find my H doesnt realise himself what he does himself in a given day. because of his job, hes always being phoned or on the phone- He forgets that. but i simply remind him, whenever he steps over his own rules and policies.


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## Honey (Sep 2, 2008)

Most of the people I have dated was jealous of me. I remember going bowling and I happened to talk to the two girls beside us. Not coming on to them or flirting, and boy was she upset. I was only talking bowling..geez!


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