# College parties and being crazy in your youth...



## Lifeisquick (Nov 16, 2008)

Nevermindd


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## Leahdorus (Jul 28, 2008)

I was not a partier in high school either, so my first year living in the dorms in college, I got a little crazy. Crazy by my standards, but that was still pretty tame by most. I drank a lot, fooled around with guys while way drunk (not all that fun, really), and my roommate was stoned ALL the time. I didn't do any drugs, but I think I had a contact high every day for the whole time I lived in that dorm room, there was so much pot smoke in there. After that first year, I moved to an apartment and while there was partying, it wasn't as much as the prior year, and I could take it or leave it. 

What I found was that I really don't like that sort of lifestyle at all. I also can't drink much tequila anymore, without feeling queasy. 

I say have some fun in college, keep your grades up, and see what happens. Maybe you'll be like me and just not be that into it. I didn't want to have a boyfriend who was into that sort of thing because I wasn't, and knew it wouldn't be a good match.

Have fun!


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## Melancholy (Nov 15, 2008)

I don't agree that you need to go out and "sew your oats" before a long term relationship just to get it out of your system. Yes, you have raging hormones and girls are very attractive at college. But you should be a little concerned about keeping some decency and dignity for yourself. Also, your future spouse may appreciate that you didn't have 100+ partners before them.

Have fun in college, but remember you are there for your education and to meet and network with others. Your objective shouldn't be to get wasted and laid every weekend.


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## *Aceso* (Oct 25, 2008)

My advice is, do whatever you want to do while single so that you don't wake up one day and say to yourself:"I wish I did....." 
Before I settled down I traveled everywhere, did all the stupid things, made many mistakes (and learned from them ) and alwasy lived by one motto "It's better to regret what you have done then to regret something you haven't". 
You are young. Live a little.


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## draconis (Oct 3, 2007)

Even with protection you can still get an STD and there is still a chance to get her pregnant although reduced. Further, things like crabs, shingles and lice don't care how carefull you are. I have had seven partners my entire life, yet I partied like the ****ens. Do some people look back and feel they missed out? Sure, plenty of people on here married young and never enjoyed the 21-25 party range of drinking and socializing. But, I always did it with my gal, and never strayed. Never felt like I missed anything. The first time is not only awkward but normally the worst so why have that many bad experiences that people will judge you by?

draconis


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

Live it up dude, your only in college for a short time.

I dated my wife through college, But we went to schools in different states, we went to our own parties and had our own friends. 

I enjoyed socializing and drinking with my male friends, didn't need to sleep around to have a good time,

I beem married to my wife for 13 years we still like to go out and have a wild time and party, not much has changed but "how we party" has, we do have three kids, so we are in check, it's more socializing then "drunk"

enjoy your time, but when I met my wife I knew she was the one. But we were young and enjoyed our youth, there was no pressure for me to be the perfect guy, nor her to be the perfect girlfriend. We would call each other and chat and laugh, get together when we could. Never asked her about what she did at parties, she never asked me.

If were you I would just have a good time and not worry about things, becuase when the right girl comes along you will know it.

we ahve a big dress up halloween party every year and a big Luau every summer, our friends and neighbors LOVE it, it's 2 times of the year they ahve a blast like the college days, and the kids LOVE it as well.


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## *Aceso* (Oct 25, 2008)

> we do have three kids, so we are in check, it's more socializing then "drunk"


:lol:Yep, when you have kids hangovers are not a good thing. That's why I drink once or twice a year.


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## draconis (Oct 3, 2007)

*Aceso* said:


> :lol:Yep, when you have kids hangovers are not a good thing. That's why I drink once or twice a year.



Same here and the grand parents have them that (those nights).

draconis


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## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

Lifeisquick said:


> I have the idea in my head (and PLEASE correct me if its an idiotic one) that doing this will sort "get it out of my system" and then later down the road make me appreciate having a stable girlfriend or wife.


I remember watching the people that did drugs and drank and stuff, and got 'around'. I was so turned off by that lifestyle. I couldn't believe all the drama and the horrible situations they got themselves into (car accidents, abortions, single moms, diseases, fights, depression, etc). I thought they were the dumbest people I ever met and I never wanted to be like them.

I have a few people in my family that thought this lifestyle was 'fun', too. Two sisters are divorced, one of which has cervical cancer and cant have kids. my brother is a single alcoholic. The 'fun' just never stops for him.

My two oldests are married for 10+ years, have kids, and a good life. They never partied.


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## voivod (Aug 7, 2008)

ljtseng said:


> I remember watching the people that did drugs and drank and stuff, and got 'around'. I was so turned off by that lifestyle. I couldn't believe all the drama and the horrible situations they got themselves into (car accidents, abortions, single moms, diseases, fights, depression, etc). I thought they were the dumbest people I ever met and I never wanted to be like them.
> 
> I have a few people in my family that thought this lifestyle was 'fun', too. Two sisters are divorced, one of which has cervical cancer and cant have kids. my brother is a single alcoholic. The 'fun' just never stops for him.
> 
> My two oldests are married for 10+ years, have kids, and a good life. They never partied.


this is mirrored throughout society. be good, good will happen for you. be bad...bad things...


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## *Aceso* (Oct 25, 2008)

> I have a few people in my family that thought this lifestyle was 'fun', too. Two sisters are divorced, one of which has cervical cancer and cant have kids.


I am sorry, but you can't tell me that your sister has a cancer because she partied. I knew a girl that died from it and she was your typical "perfect" girl. Never drank, smoked, took drugs and then she died at the age of 28 (still a virgin because she was saving herself for marriage). So there, sometimes it's the cards you have been dealt and other times you invite bad things in your life. 



> this is mirrored throughout society. be good, good will hapen for you. be bad...bad things...


No way. No way. Everybody did some bad things in their life at least once but if you learn from it and move on. If you don't learn anything....well that's when things turn to s#!t.


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## brad (Jul 31, 2008)

Party hard!!
I did it all in college and beyond. You name it (threesomes etc.) I did it. 
I am now married and have two kids. 
boy am I glad I did all those things. I will never wonder like so many others what it was like to do so.


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## voivod (Aug 7, 2008)

okay, here's how it works. you wake up, go to class, come back to the dorm, call some friends, borrow your buddy's stereo, haul it up the stairs, hook it up, can't get that damned left speaker to work, people start showing up, no one brought beer cuz they thought you were having a keg, somebody gets into your munchy stash, someone else shows up half drunk, falls down in you bathroom, riipping the shower curtain down. then you do the beer run, come back, you pictures are ripped off the wall, your cocktail table is busted because some drunk chick fell over it. she's "passed out" in your room on your bed, dudes are trying to "wake her up," neighbors call the cops, whole thing gets busted.

oh yeah, did you drink? you're hung over the next morning, when it starts all over again. fun, huh?


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## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

*Aceso* said:


> I am sorry, but you can't tell me that your sister has a cancer because she partied.


cervical cancer...and actually i never said she had it b/c she partied. I said she partied and had cervical cancer. but never said it was a cause and effect relationship. these were just examples from my own immediate family of the two different lifestyles. i feel i am blessed to have a lot of family so that i can learn which lifestyle i want to live.


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

LJ and Void, I will also have to disagree with you.

My wife and I both partied, at different schools.

We are not drug addicts, not alcholohics, not criminals.

We both have very successful jobs, been married 13 years, no major issues in our marriage, 3 great smart children.

I oach numerous sport teams for my children, we do boy scouts and girl scouts, I am the HOA president, I ran my 20 year reunion from another state. I ahve allot of friends and well liked.

Anyone that goes to college, pretty much 95% party at some point. the issue is do you go overbaord every weekend or once in a blue moon? I worked 2 jobs and paid my own way through college, but when I wanted to blow off steam and hang with my boys I did and had a great time.

Academics came first, but partying helped relieve some stressful things as a youth.

I think being part of a fraternity or a sority is a good thing. It is good networking and good community service.

I say each to their own, If he parties, let him, just be responsible. I never drove drunk, we had a friend that did not drink at all, but he "partied with us" we always bought his food and soft drinks when we went out.

Again, it's about responsibility and maturity, learning life's lessons and experimenting.

Hey if it's not for you then don't do it, but for some, it is a good thing. I LOVED my college days, they were a blast. 

Now when we "party" it is more socializing and having fun with our friends then anything else.

Life is short, enjoy it.

Cancer has nothing to do with this.


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## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

GAsoccerman said:


> Life is short, enjoy it.
> 
> Cancer has nothing to do with this.


In my family it does have something to do with it. Aside from seeing what friends have gone through, Ive had to watch what my sisters are going through, and my brother, b/c they thought life was short so live it up. i do know a few people who partied, slept around, and are just fine. Im not saying everyone is going to end in this demise, but to me its just not worth the risks.


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## fossill (Nov 25, 2008)

Lifeisquick, I'm just recently out of college, and now married, and might have at least a decent opinion for you.

I was never a party guy in college, although I had my fair share of girlfriends. I never slept with a girl that I wasn't in a committed relationship with mind you. 

I don't regret at all I never partied that much, nor did I do anything out of the ordinary. I drank VERY little, I had 6 months where I was single and did the whole, "friends got me out to drink, we drank, danced, and I stumbled home", but I have never done drugs, nor have I ever gone home with a woman.

I think it's all relative to what you want to do. Most people aren't all that impressed with the party animals out there. It might be funny in college, but you never know what could happen while you are out doing those things. Getting busted at a party really does have more effects on things than you may think. Be it school, friends, or other such things.

College was about learning for me. High school in all relativity means very little. I would take college seriously. I don't regret doing so, I'm married now, my wife's a piece of work, but I don't regret anything.

Good luck with whatever you choose.


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## cheewagacheewaga (Aug 28, 2008)

I'm 28-years old. Went to a very good University and studied really hard. Looking back at it, I wish I had partied more and got experience from women. 

If I were you, don't worry about education so much. You only live once so have fun! And yes, I'm being serious. Being an overachiever and hard working only stresses you out.


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## draconis (Oct 3, 2007)

cheewagacheewaga said:


> I'm 28-years old. Went to a very good University and studied really hard. Looking back at it, I wish I had partied more and got experience from women.
> 
> If I were you, don't worry about education so much. You only live once so have fun! And yes, I'm being serious. Being an overachiever and hard working only stresses you out.


This is bad advice, don't listen.

draconis


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## Amplexor (Feb 13, 2008)

cheewagacheewaga said:


> I'm 28-years old. Went to a very good University and studied really hard. Looking back at it, I wish I had partied more and got experience from women.
> 
> If I were you, don't worry about education so much. You only live once so have fun! And yes, I'm being serious. Being an overachiever and hard working only stresses you out.


Agreed Drac!!

Having a great time in college and performing well are not mutually exclusive. I worked hard, graduated from a major university in 4.5 years with a decent GPA. Even made Dean’s list and graduated with the degree I went in for and two minors to boot. As for the partying and women part, I was a four year, live in member of a fraternity in the late 70’s. Nuff said!


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## draconis (Oct 3, 2007)

I had a bright friend accepted into one of the best schools of it's kind in the country. He partied and flunked out the second half of his first year got kicked out and still had 25,000 in college loan debts.

draconis


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## cheewagacheewaga (Aug 28, 2008)

draconis said:


> I had a bright friend accepted into one of the best schools of it's kind in the country. He partied and flunked out the second half of his first year got kicked out and still had 25,000 in college loan debts.
> 
> draconis


Well, sucks for him. Good thing(?) I haven't ended up like him. I bet he still got more women than I ever will, and probably is still getting more women. For some reason women like to pick the losers.


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

LJ, I ahd a brother die from Brain cancer, never partied, was a state trooper, married, had a kid, died at 35 after removing 3 tumors over 5 years.

Watching a little girl die from cancer at my daughters school, 8 years old.

Watched my father in law choke to death from throat cancer, good father and husband.

My niece's husband, at the age of 25 has testicular cancer, married 4 months. he was a scholar athlete, not a partier.

partying and cancer ahve ZERo to do with each other.

It is a HORRIBLE Horrible disease, Don't mix the two.

I am sorry for your loss, but it is a disease and there is nothing to blame,t here is no "cause" or way to prevent it. I beleive some of it is Genetic, some of it is your environment, or a combination of both.

Again, Life is short, enjoy it....how you wish to enjoy it, is your choice.


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

I went to a good school, partied and worked my way through with two jobs. 

It comes down to the person and responsibility. I worked and studied when I had to and needed to. Sure I partied, But like Amp, studies came first and were far more important.

you can have both, but like anything, being excessive in either is usually bad.


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## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

GAsoccerman said:


> I am sorry for your loss, but it is a disease and there is nothing to blame,t here is no "cause" or way to prevent it. I beleive some of it is Genetic, some of it is your environment, or a combination of both..


Actually if you look up the first three main causes of cervical cancer it is sleeping around, or sleeping with someone who sleeps around, or having intercourse at a young age. there are a couple other factors but they are farther down on the list. im not just pulling this stuff out of the air. 

i am also part of a study for a new drug to prevent cervical cancer. Part of the initial screening is that participants in the study cannot have more then one sexual partner. The drug company wouldnt want to waste their money and screw up their study results if the odds are the you have it anyway. Multiple sexual partners is a very real cause of cervical cancer.


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

LJ, You are talking about HPV, I plan on getting my daughter the Guardisil (merk's product) vacine as well. Not only do I want to limit her chances of Cancer but that also of other possible STD's, I hope my daughter does not sleep around, but you never know aboutt he boys whom she will be with and what they could pass onto her for her "first encounter" It only takes one time to get an STD, that is how Jessica Simpson got her STD, her hubby slept around and gave it to her, she was a innocent bystander.

As any Cancer it is part of your genetics and environment (sexual partners)

I applaud you for doing the trial and being part of "the cure" Kudo's for that.


Again, Partying and cancer have nothing to do with each other. You can be an Angel and your husband can sleep with a hooker and give you something...life is full of chance.

But again, any person willing to fight the battle of Cancer with either Money, walking for a cause, physical donation of time, helping those who have this dreaded disease, anything. I applaud.

I have seen far to many people suffer and all kinds of ages, back rounds, lifestyles.

here is a link to the American Cancer I donate over $5000 a year to the American cancer society.

As Jimmy V would say, "beat the disease" and that is what it is, a disease. Again best of luck in your trial, my wife falls into the same category.

Human Papillomavirus (HPV) and Cancer: Q & A - National Cancer Institute


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## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

GAsoccerman said:


> LJ, You are talking about HPV, I plan on getting my daughter the Guardisil (merk's product) vacine as well. Not only do I want to limit her chances of Cancer but that also of other possible STD's, I hope my daughter does not sleep around, but you never know aboutt he boys whom she will be with and what they could pass onto her for her "first encounter" It only takes one time to get an STD


That is exactly my point. It only takes one time. And the risks increase exponentially with every partner thereafter. What floors me is that everyone knows it, too. Everyone is aware of the risks, but they want to believe if they trust the pharmaceutical companies, that they wont be at risk. People just keep trying to micromanage the adverse side effects with birth control and now vaccines. No one seems to notice that its not working. Who knows what "they'll" think of next. But i can think of a pretty simple solution...


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

agreed mommy, that is why she has not gotten it yet, as with anything, give it time to see what happens.

Like a new type of model car, the first 2 generations usually have "issues" then they are corrected for better models.

as with anything things get better after trial and error, no clinical study or vaccine is perfect.

nor do I expect a "cure all" But the best thing I can do as a father is prepare my daughter for the real world, that not everything is perfect and that daddy can not fix everything.

The best thing you can do is educate your children to the risks of life and what they can do to prevent it. It will be their decision ultimately if they follow your advice or not.

how many of us have followed our parents advice??


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

lt there are risks with everything you do in life...

To much sun gives you cancer

To much sweet and low can cause cancer

Simply going to work gave people cancer (asbestous)

life is full of choices and options....everything is a risk.

you can die tomoorrow from a car accident, a shooting, a heart attack.

I had a friend, 22 years old died from a heart attack.

Lost another brother to a gun shot wound in a bar fight (2 of my 3 brothers are gone)

My father died from Hepotitis from eating Raw clams.

I was a lifeguard for 5 years, saved 7 people from drowing and countless small children whose parents where clueless that their toddler was under water because they were to busy gossiping.

Life is a crap shoot, you can sit there and worry about what if, or deal with what is and roll with it.

As I said, I think your a great person, alot to offer, read many of your posts and you have great info, especially with your marriage and brother issues, so don't take any of this the wrong way.

I just can sit here and "worry about what if" I deal with what is and adjust as necessary. I enjoy every living breathing moment I have with my wife and childre, friends and neighbors. 

You simply just do not know when it will end. but that is how I live, we are all different and have to make our own decisions about our lives.

Best of luck dear.


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## TheLuckiest08 (Jun 2, 2008)

I don't think I agree with many of the previous posters.

First of all, you're paying (or your parents...) THOUSANDS of dollars on a college education. Many people are not lucky enough to have such an opportunity, so don't blow it. If you do you'll really regret it when you try to look for a job and find yourself making a lower salary than you could have gotten had you applied yourself.

As for the sleeping around thing, I think it could become a habit. It might make it harder for you to commit to women in the future. Personally, I would be wary of a guy who had a bunch of flings with women in the past. It will reflect poorly on you.


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## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

GAsoccerman said:


> lt there are risks with everything you do in life...


I know. I knew that would come up at some point. When it comes to sleeping around, however, that involves the possibility of creating a life, even when using contraceptives. So not only are there risks of disease, health problems from pharmaceutical drugs, emotional problems, habits created, unwanted associations incurred, etc, there is also the potential of bringing a life into the middle of it. That, to me, is not something to be played around with. 

I've actually lived on both sides of the spectrum. growing up my friends were pot heads, partiers, slept around, drank. then, for awhile, i lived with a group of people who believed it was wrong to even kiss pationately before marriage. It was quite the culture shock for me. I was actually asked to remove my dr.pepper from the fridge. lol. The split in my family has been interesting, too. 

But ive learned a lot. its obvious which side i think is 'right.' the evidence from my experience is just overwhelming. 



GAsoccerman said:


> As I said, I think your a great person, alot to offer, read many of your posts and you have great info, especially with your marriage and brother issues, so don't take any of this the wrong way.


Thanks GA. I really appreciate the complement. I promise I do not take it the wrong way. I debate this with my sister, and brother, all the time. They think Im too conservative, judgmental, an "aqua fiesta" i think is the term (party killer). In the end they know Im just concerned for them and that I feel sorry for what they are going through, irregardless of causality.


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

LJ fair enough dear fair enough...


The luckiest...Some of the best and greatest, smartest people I know failed out of college their freshmen year due to partying. after failing out, They got up, brushed off their pants, cleaned up their act and got back to work and completed college.

Most colleges will let you expunge your first semester if you fail out that semester, becuase this happens to 25% of the kids.

Most go on to graduate with high degrees.

As they say sometime a good kick in the nuts is a good start. 

Also did you know only 25% of the US population has a college degree, so yes it is something special.


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