# Supporting each other through this stressful time



## frusdil (Sep 5, 2013)

My husband and I are about to face one of the scariest times in our marriage. Our beautiful girl (my stepdaughter) is about to undergo major spinal surgery this week.

We've known since late last year that it was happening, but the time has gone so quickly and it's now upon us. 

This is major surgery, taking about 6 hours and then going to ICU. Incredibly stressful for my husband and I (I realise the connection we each have with her is different being she's biologically his). We both are terrified of something going wrong, as all parents are I'm sure. 

So far we're doing pretty good...cutting each other some slack and being conscious of being kind to each other. How much, if any, involvement her "real" mum will have we don't know. We have our girl 100% of the time because she has some special needs that her mum can't cope with. Either way, we'll be fine...we've got this.

I hope...I'm so scared for our girl. If I could switch places and do this for her I would


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## Celes (Apr 28, 2015)

Aww I'm sorry to hear that. That's rough. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your girl. Hope the surgery goes well.


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## jld (Dec 1, 2013)

frusdil said:


> My husband and I are about to face one of the scariest times in our marriage. Our beautiful girl (my stepdaughter) is about to undergo major spinal surgery this week.
> 
> We've known since late last year that it was happening, but the time has gone so quickly and it's now upon us.
> 
> ...


Of course you would. You love her very much.

Will keep her in my heart this week. (((frusdil's dsd and her loving family)))


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

Praying for her and you sweetie!


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## giddiot (Jun 28, 2015)

I will be praying also.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*Prayers flowing your way from Aggieland, @frusdil

May our Heavenly Father make His presence so very real in all of your lives during this most stressful time!*


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## frusdil (Sep 5, 2013)

Thankyou so much for the well wishes everyone, so very much appreciated and needed right now xx


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## Blondilocks (Jul 4, 2013)

She has you in her corner so her odds of a successful recovery are greatly enhanced. Will keep you and yours in my prayers.


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## meson (May 19, 2011)

I hope all goes well with the surgery. My thoughts are with you, your husband and stepdaughter.


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## Livvie (Jan 20, 2014)

I hope the surgery goes well, with a quick recovery!


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## Emerging Buddhist (Apr 7, 2016)

Many warm thoughts and wishes your way...


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

I am sure you have been all over the net reading about similar cases, outcomes for this particular surgery ... I can only imagine the hope, but also the fear waiting upon this day, wanting/ praying for everything to go smoothly, putting so much faith in the team of Surgeon's hands upon your step daughter. 

I am imagining this surgery will give her a better life, maybe she was in daily pain.. Try to stay positive, above all.. she needs it right now, the support, reassurance, this has to be so frightening for a young girl...some cry & think the world is coming to an end -just over a flu shot ...

Everyone hold on to each other... and remember .. it's the greatest time to live, with the amazing medical advances we have...Praying for the best.


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## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

Hope your family comes out the other side of this stronger than ever. You got this!


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## Daisy12 (Jul 10, 2016)

I hope the surgery goes well and she recovers fast. All the best. 

Sent from my D2206 using Tapatalk


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## lorikeet25 (Jun 22, 2016)

I hope all goes well.


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## MEM2020 (Aug 23, 2009)

A true measure of a person is there ability to truly adopt their young charges - independent of blood. 

Your H is truly a lucky man. As is your child. 





frusdil said:


> My husband and I are about to face one of the scariest times in our marriage. Our beautiful girl (my stepdaughter) is about to undergo major spinal surgery this week.
> 
> We've known since late last year that it was happening, but the time has gone so quickly and it's now upon us.
> 
> ...


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## emmasmith (Aug 11, 2016)

I hope all goes well and Praying for her!


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## frusdil (Sep 5, 2013)

You're not going to believe this...the hospital stuffed up in a big, big way and they told us today that they're unable to operate tommorrow!! The day before the operation!! Our poor girl now has to wait another week  

She is absolutely gutted...she sobbed in my arms when we got the call and then took herself off to bed  She's in pain, she can't sleep, she'd prepared herself mentally for this and after all of that, she now has to do it all over again.

I'm gutted for her, and for my darling husband 

She asked me why these things keep happening to her...I told her everything happens for a reason...this time tommorrow night we could be saying "Thank God it wasn't done today!". Seemed to help a little.

Poor little darling  Haven't heard from her "real" "mum"...grrrrr


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## frusdil (Sep 5, 2013)

MEM2020 said:


> A true measure of a person is there ability to truly adopt their young charges - independent of blood.
> 
> Your H is truly a lucky man. As is your child.


Thankyou so much for saying that...you made me tear up. You have no idea how much that means to me xx

Thankyou so very much to you all for the support...I have to be strong for my husband and daughter, so I really appreciate having you all to lean on x


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## jld (Dec 1, 2013)

frusdil said:


> You're not going to believe this...the hospital stuffed up in a big, big way and they told us today that they're unable to operate tommorrow!! The day before the operation!! Our poor girl now has to wait another week
> 
> She is absolutely gutted...she sobbed in my arms when we got the call and then took herself off to bed  She's in pain, she can't sleep, she'd prepared herself mentally for this and after all of that, she now has to do it all over again.
> 
> ...


Oh, no! Poor little girl! Poor all of you!


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## frusdil (Sep 5, 2013)

Today's the day. It's 5.30am and we're about to head off to the hospital. 

Please hold our girl in your thoughts today...the op starts in 2 hours, and should be finished 7-8 hours from then.

Absolutely terrified but holding it together...so far...


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## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

Keeping good thoughts for all of you!


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## Satya (Jun 22, 2012)

Wishing great success for the surgery and a speedy recovery! X


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## frusdil (Sep 5, 2013)

She's gone to surgery. I stayed with her until
she went under.

Now we wait. Please let it all go well for her.


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## jld (Dec 1, 2013)

Holding her in our hearts, frusdil . . .


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

You, she and the rest of your family are in my thoughts right now!!! Sending 'speedy recovery' vibes your way


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## Satya (Jun 22, 2012)

@frusdil, I sincerely hope all went well?


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## frusdil (Sep 5, 2013)

Hi all, sorry for not updating sooner...Ive had my hands full, lol. The op went well, no surprises and our brave girl is doing well. The wait was excruciating - almost seven hours!! 

Our darling girl is in quite a bit of pain, but they're keeping it fairly well controlled. Her bravery puts most adults to shame. I'm so incredibly proud of her. I got to come home lastnight - my husband stayed at the hospital overnight with her, it was nice to sleep in a comfy bed lol. 

Not sure which one of us is staying with her tonight, will play it by ear and see what she wants 

Thankyou so much for holding us in your thoughts...so nice to know I have you all to lean on xx


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Thank you for your update.

Best wishes for her full recovery.


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## jld (Dec 1, 2013)

MattMatt said:


> Thank you for your update.
> 
> Best wishes for her full recovery.


Ditto.


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## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

Wonderful news!

I know all of you are so relieved that it's over and life can return to normal (the very best place to be).


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## Satya (Jun 22, 2012)

That's a relief! Glad to read she is on the mend. Don't forget to try end squeeze in some decompression time for you and your husband, too. X


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