# Clues



## Ynot (Aug 26, 2014)

that you still need to do some growing...

When you read a thread and find that you can agree with one side of a discussion and then later go back and find you now agree with the other side of the discussion, it is probably a good clue to yourself that you need some more time to reconsider some of your own issues.

It isn't always as black and white as we would like to have it be in our own minds. Sometimes you can be reminded of the subtle nuances of a sitation simply by observing and not participating.


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## SecondTime'Round (Jan 15, 2015)

Hm. I see it the opposite way. When you can begin to see things more than just YOUR way, from just YOUR perspective/experience/side of the story, maybe it's a sign that some growth has occurred.


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## Ynot (Aug 26, 2014)

SecondTime'Round said:


> Hm. I see it the opposite way. When you can begin to see things more than just YOUR way, from just YOUR perspective/experience/side of the story, maybe it's a sign that some growth has occurred.


For sure, you can see that some growth has occurred. I didn't mean to imply otherwise. My point was that you now realize that more may be needed in order to sort things through.


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## SecondTime'Round (Jan 15, 2015)

Ynot said:


> For sure, you can see that some growth has occurred. I didn't mean to imply otherwise. My point was that you now realize that more may be needed in order to sort things through.


Ah, yes, I definitely see that, too and can apply it to my own life .


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## Acoa (Sep 21, 2012)

Albert Einstein said, "the more you know, the more you realize you don't know." 

As you heal and the pain fades you start to see the 'other side' of issues. You may not agree with it, or do anything differently with that knowledge. But it brings perspective, and in that wisdom sometimes peace (not always). Sometimes you realize the folly of your own actions. You can't turn back the dial and change the past. But you can live your life differently from that day forward. Sometimes we have to go through painful experiences to become a better us.


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## Ynot (Aug 26, 2014)

Acoa said:


> Albert Einstein said, "the more you know, the more you realize you don't know."
> 
> As you heal and the pain fades you start to see the 'other side' of issues. You may not agree with it, or do anything differently with that knowledge. But it brings perspective, and in that wisdom sometimes peace (not always). Sometimes you realize the folly of your own actions. You can't turn back the dial and change the past. But you can live your life differently from that day forward. Sometimes we have to go through painful experiences to become a better us.


This^^^^^ was exactly the kind of thing I was thinking about when I wrote this on another thread:

"This begs the question of why would this same statement not apply to his marriage? After all don't most people get married for precisely the excitement we have (at that time) for our SO? Perhaps in the excitement of love he married her against everything he knew (then) about honor, kindness and honesty. In fact these ideals may in fact have been fairly misunderstood or undeveloped relative to the point the OP is at now.
Honor, kindness and honesty are not absolutes in that they are hardwired into every person's thinking. Our understanding of them develops with each new experience we have in life. 
Just think of the experiences you have had just this very day! Now expand that view to include your whole life. Most if not all may have gone unrecognized in the moment. But it was the sum of each of them that has brought us to this point in lives."


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