# Surviving



## MegaTbone (13 d ago)

So just a general concensus posting, for the guys. Which do you feel given a choice, could you survive and continue with your partner: 
Emotional affair, or
Physical affair.
Kicked this thought around for awhile now. As crappy as either situation is, given the choice I feel I could survive an emotional affair. For me its easier to cope with it just being from the mind and heart to get by. Just can't imagine I could ever get over knowing that my mate had willingly had sex with another man. It absolutely repulses me to even consider following another man where I was the only one that should be there. The mind movies would be horrid!
So what do you think?


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

MegaTbone said:


> So just a general concensus posting, for the guys. Which do you feel given a choice, could you survive and continue with your partner:
> Emotional affair, or
> Physical affair.
> Kicked this thought around for awhile now. As crappy as either situation is, given the choice I feel I could survive an emotional affair. For me its easier to cope with it just being from the mind and heart to get by. Just can't imagine I could ever get over knowing that my mate had willingly had sex with another man. It absolutely repulses me to even consider following another man where I was the only one that should be there. The mind movies would be horrid!
> So what do you think?


I refuse to live with either.


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

Neither. Kicked her to the curb!!


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

I know what I bring to the table in my marriage and I won’t put up with any cheating whether it’s emotional or physical.


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## BeyondRepair007 (Nov 4, 2021)

BTDT

Neither.

I’ve tried (because I’m an idiot) to live with both.
Big fail.
Never again will I even try to “live with it”.


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## Sfort (Sep 28, 2019)

I don't think there is such a thing as an emotional affair. A physical affair is the end of the road.


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

Sfort said:


> I don't think there is such a thing as an emotional affair. A physical affair is the end of the road.


An emotional affair is just an affair that hasn’t got physical. Yet.


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## Sfort (Sep 28, 2019)

Andy1001 said:


> An emotional affair is just an affair that hasn’t got physical. Yet.


I understand the definition. I just don't think it's an affair. If my spouse becomes infatuated or attracted to another, I may be able to win her back. If they become physical, the damage cannot be undone. It's probably semantics, but unless it's physical, it's not an affair. It may be an inappropriate interaction or even relationship.


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

Sfort said:


> I understand the definition. I just don't think it's an affair. If my spouse becomes infatuated or attracted to another, I may be able to win her back. If they become physical, the damage cannot be undone. It's probably semantics, but unless it's physical, it's not an affair. It may be an inappropriate interaction or even relationship.


Why would you want to "win" her back? Sounds like the pick me game.


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## Sfort (Sep 28, 2019)

Numb26 said:


> Why would you want to "win" her back? Sounds like the pick me game.


Good question. My comment assumes that I am equally if not fully responsible for the disconnect. You notice I did not say fall out of love. The situations I mentioned are more of a temporary nature. I've had situations during my long life in which I could have given into my weaknesses and caused problems in my marriage, but I never have.


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## MegaTbone (13 d ago)

Divinely Favored said:


> I refuse to live with either.


That sounds similar to an a question I asked my wife. Would you rather be right of be happy. Wanna guess her answer?


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

MegaTbone said:


> That sounds similar to an a question I asked my wife. Would you rather be right of be happy. Wanna guess her answer?


Happy I'm right!


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## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

I just couldn't pick either. Emotional affair is a transfer of love an affection to another person, so to me is an affair, regardless if it hasn't gone physical yet. So, either is divorce for me.


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## Rus47 (Apr 1, 2021)

MegaTbone said:


> Emotional affair, or
> Physical affair.


Isn't the first just a precursor to the second? Or the second a natural progression from the first?

It seems to me the only reason an EA was the only thing that happened was it was discovered before it had chance to go physical. Which it most likely will sooner or later.

If someone who swore to forsake all others for you has developed an interest of any kind in another, I would say it is time to dissolve the partnership and let them go be with their new lover.

Either is a show stopper for me.


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

If either of these involved lies and deception, I'd end the relationship.


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## MegaTbone (13 d ago)

Rus47 said:


> Isn't the first just a precursor to the second? Or the second a natural progression from the first?
> 
> It seems to me the only reason an EA was the only thing that happened was it was discovered before it had chance to go physical. Which it most likely will sooner or later.
> 
> ...


I can get that. Remember its a hypothetical question for discussion.


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