# husband obsessed with huge breasts



## betrayed32

ok, so the other day my husband accidentally left his phone at home when he went to work. He has done this before and i have never looked through his phone or had the urge to, but for some reason on that particular day something told me to go through his internet history. I honestly didn't really think i would find anything, but in his history i found tens of dozens (if not hundreds) of times he had logged on to various pornography sites and all of them were of women with HUGE breasts. when i say huge, i don't mean like a D cup - i mean these women literally all had breasts the size of my head. And some of the sites were just of women with huge breasts taking off their tops and touching or shaking their breasts,etc. I confronted him about it when he got home and after not being able to speak for a while, he said he was so sorry and he would never do it again. i asked him how long this had been going on and he said since he got his new phone that has internet (which i think has been about a year.) i feel so hurt and like he is not attracted to me, although he says he is happy with my body. I am a 34D, but i feel so insecure now that i have seen what kind of breasts actaully turn him on. I am trying really hard to move on, but i think about this all the time and i don't know how to get over it. I would like to hear from anyone out there who can tell me if this is normal guy behavior, or if i should be worried.


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## Beelzebub

bigger are better sometimes.


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## betrayed32

I'm not saying bigger is not nice, but i just don't understand why he chose me in the first place if he was not happy with me. he could have chosen someone else that looked like what he wanted instead of doing this behind my back..


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## Posse

I love my new 2012 pickup truck.

I could have gotten a sport car if I wanted, but I didn't want that. I wanted the pickup truck I got. I absolutely love it. It is the best driving, most comfortable vehicle I have ever owned. It has bells and whistles on it that I could never get in a sports car or a motorcycle. I couldn't be more thrilled with the truck. It has a Cadillac-smooth ride (no small feat for a truck), has excellent cargo capacity, and is downright awesome to behold. I get multiple compliments on it daily. I wouldn't ever want to get rid of it for a sports car or a motorcycle. Driving it is pure joy, and is a thrill every time I get behind the wheel.

I still like looking at sports cars and motorcycles, though.


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## betrayed32

thanks for the reply. I completely get what you're saying. and honestly, if he had just been looking at random porn sites, i probably wouldn't have cared. it's just the fact that ALL the sites he went to were strictly of women with enormous breasts. maybe if there had been a little variety in what he was looking at it wouldnt have been so hurtful. its just the fact that now i know that's his "thing" which i dont have. its hard to accept..


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## Maricha75

Beelzebub said:


> bigger are better sometimes.


Yea, unless YOU are the one carrying them around! Trust me, it's not as great as you may think... backaches, neck aches, etc...


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## dormant

I agree it is nice to look at large breasts, but...

If I'm going to get intimate, I'll take real over size any day!


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## Almostrecovered

fantasy is different from reality

don't think he is settling for your smaller breasts


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## CandieGirl

It's just a stupid compulsion, and he can't stop himself. It really doesn't have anything to do with you. And seriously, huge boobs (real ones) are gross. The implanted ones aren't much better, either.


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## betrayed32

I understand porn is interesting. i even like watching it to see other people having sex or oral sex, etc, but i have never watched it because i wanted to look at other guys bodies. i just like to see what they are doing. it wouldn't have bothered me if he was just watching normal porn so he could see what people were doing to each other. he was specifically viewing sites of women with huge breasts sometimes they were even alone not even having sex so obviously the only reason he was watching it was to fantasize about their huge boobs. this is what is so upsetting. I asked him if he wanted me to get implants and he said no, he likes me the way i am, but i find that very hard to believe. i kept pushing the issue and finally he said ok, get them if you want but i think deep down that is what he really wants. i just feel so sad that he seems unhappy with what he has. i'm not small chested, but feel so completely inadequate. am i overreacting?


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## lamaga

Oh, betrayed. In the gentlest way possible, yeah. I think you are, a bit. For one thing, you don't have small breasts if you are a D cup. I'm sure you are just what he wants. And yeah, he looks at big-breasted women in porn -- they're like you, but more so.

I don't pretend to understand the whole guy/porn thing, and I don't want this thread to turn into another referendum on porn, but I don't think this means anything about your relationship.

And I'm so sorry. I know this is hurtful for you.


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## Goldmember357

your boobs are not small at all you should not be insecure but than again i understand if he is looking at huge boobs all day


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## IndiaInk

*sigh*

Can you just blame yourself for snooping?..seriously...I think that's your best chance to "let this go"

Please do not spend another minute comparing your REAL-LIFE Breasts...to some porno pics

I guarantee you...to your husband...you are in another stratosphere all together (a far higher one)

As I'm sure you've heard a thousand times...women are not the same as men. There's a reason the porn industry caters to them...there's a reason they go to strip clubs and women don't...there's a reason both FEMALE and MALE prostitutes cater to men

The problem is: 

although we can explain to ourselves the under-lying reasons with logic and biology...it's still _*REALLY *_ hard to "understand" why they're so much more sex-focused ...

Simply because we aren't this way...and because there's no female equivalent...no analogy one can draw...and alas, nothing anyone can say that will make his "huge breast obsession" relateable to you

While everyone's different, for what it's worth, this is my general rule on pornography:

Don't ask, don't tell.

(don't go out of your way to find evidence of it's use (if it's going to be an issue for you)...and then, provided it's not a major problem/addiction, you'll never have to know)

Regarding "normal" male porn use---ignorance is bliss

Funny thing is...it's just evidence of him being a "red-blooded male"...if you'd found gay porn...or evidence of an affair...then you'd have reason to doubt, to be upset...and a reason to feel so awful

My guess is that even if you were willing to get triple J implants (or whatever)...he *genuinely* would *hate* that...also, when a guy's not attracted to his woman (it's really freaking obvious!!)...in general men are not subtle creatures sexually...if he *enjoys* sleeping with you...and *wants* to sleep with you...and *MARRIED* you...then trust me, he *LOVES *your breasts

Don't try to understand the fascination with naked ladies and boobs...it's a futile exercise in frustration....heck...guys can't even explain it themselves...I mean, as you saw when you confronted him...in a way they can be made deeply embarrassed by their fascination really

So, if you have a good, and faithful husband...just embrace this as one of life's unanswerable questions...and love yourself enough...give yourself enough credit...to confidently believe that your husband loves YOU and the breasts you come with...far more deeply and profoundly...than he does some anonymous pictures on his iphone

The more you dwell on this...the more you are choosing to torture yourself for NO GOOD REASON

So just stop it...okay?

I think you'll feel better


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## betrayed32

India Ink, thank you for the reply. It's funny you should mention triple J breasts, because it seems like the girl who he had the most downloads of has that size. next to one of her pics it listed her size. Just curious, why would you say that if i were willing to get triple J implants my husband would probably hate it? why wouldn't he want me to look like what he secretly desires and fantasizes about. wouldn't he be happy if he could have that fantasy in real life too?
Also, if it were the other way around and he found out that i had downloaded dozens or hundreds of porn on my phone and every single one of them was about guys with enormous penises, i find it hard to belive that he wouldn't think that is what i wished he looked like and he would probably feel insecure about it...


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## IndiaInk

Have you googled men's opinions on fake breasts?

If not--- do it.

The things a guy looks for in his WIFE are often very different then the things he looks for to get off.

Men draw a clear dividing line in the brain between women they respect and women they use.

Your typical up-standing guy could be sexually attracted to a porn-star...but would he want her for a wife? Dear God NO!!!

In a way, it'd be nice if we could wave a magic wand that would give you a male sex drive/sexuality for a week...so that you could really feel the allure porn has to testosterone filled guys...even that very specific/fetish type of porn ( maybe large penises as you suggested)....

Then, have your husband find it and feel hurt and insecure ( yes, absolutely I think he would feel the same way you feel now)....and you would have the unpleasant, embarrassing task of trying to explain how your desire to look at that porn and your desire for your husband and his body are so apples to oranges...so night and day different...that his belief that your drive to look at large penises is in any way connected to your attraction to him...seems utterly ludicrous...that the porn drive is part of a powerful yet crude, animal sexual arousal that is a uncontrollable as sweating or breathing...and that you'd never think to give a minutes comparison between the two

Unfortunately, as women, we have no empathy with this porn-desire (and yes, even your own female 'interest' in porn...is not relateable to a man's interest in it...and never can compare).... so we have to take it on faith...or maybe take it based on the fact that the porn-stars, strippers and all the female workers of the seedy sex industry in this world....don't end up the "total catch" husbands...if they're married at all

I think he said "yes" to your question about implants after you'd pestered him because at this point he'd say anything to make you happy as he feels terrible ...

Personally, I don't know ANY men that wanted their wives to get implants..not saying they don't exist I'm just saying I don't know any (and I don't live in the bible-belt or anything remotely close)


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## MattMatt

betrayed32 said:


> ok, so the other day my husband accidentally left his phone at home when he went to work. He has done this before and i have never looked through his phone or had the urge to, but for some reason on that particular day something told me to go through his internet history. I honestly didn't really think i would find anything, but in his history i found tens of dozens (if not hundreds) of times he had logged on to various pornography sites and all of them were of women with HUGE breasts. when i say huge, i don't mean like a D cup - i mean these women literally all had breasts the size of my head. And some of the sites were just of women with huge breasts taking off their tops and touching or shaking their breasts,etc. I confronted him about it when he got home and after not being able to speak for a while, he said he was so sorry and he would never do it again. i asked him how long this had been going on and he said since he got his new phone that has internet (which i think has been about a year.) i feel so hurt and like he is not attracted to me, although he says he is happy with my body. I am a 34D, but i feel so insecure now that i have seen what kind of breasts actaully turn him on. I am trying really hard to move on, but i think about this all the time and i don't know how to get over it. I would like to hear from anyone out there who can tell me if this is normal guy behavior, or if i should be worried.


Is it normal guy behaviour? No. Not at all. Ouch! Damn. My nose just grew and poked my damned monitor!

Normal? Probably!

34D? Hmmm. That sounds big enough... Oh. Sorry. Now I am blushing!


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## betrayed32

India Ink, i dont get this idea that men want to marry nice sweet women but stare at ****s. it doesn't make sense! if i get huge boobs does that make me a ****ty person all of a sudden and all my good qualities he wants in a wife will disappear? why wouldnt he want it ALL - the whole package - in one person. not to fantasize about one type of woman and be with another type of woman. it is mind blowing to me. I can see that i'm the only one on this forum with my point of view and i guess it will bother me forever and i will probably never get over it until i look like the women he stares at all day while he's not with me..


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## lamaga

Betrayed, you have received multiple assurances that no, this doesn't mean anything and no, it doesn't mean that he doesn't love your breasts, but _you don't want to hear them_. 

This is a fairly typical phenomenon on fora like these -- the person who is not looking for an answer so much as reinforcement in his/her determination to be offended no matter what.

We can't fix this for you. We've offered perspectives that you don't want to hear. So, be offended. Don't ever get over it. Ruin your marriage over this. It's really not going to hurt us at all. But is that the person you want to be?


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## tacoma

betrayed32 said:


> thanks for the reply. I completely get what you're saying. and honestly, if he had just been looking at random porn sites, i probably wouldn't have cared. it's just the fact that ALL the sites he went to were strictly of women with enormous breasts. maybe if there had been a little variety in what he was looking at it wouldnt have been so hurtful. its just the fact that now i know that's his "thing" which i dont have. its hard to accept..


You`re bound and determined NOT to get it aren`t you?

If it starts to sink in you`ll probably stop it from doing so somehow.


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## betrayed32

you are all right in your comments that i probably came on here to get justification for how i feel. i don't get it and yes, i am completely utterly traumatized. i literally think about it all day, go to sleep thinking about it, dream about it, wake up in the middle of the night thinking about it, first thing i think in the morning.. i see huge breasts in my mind all the time now and i think am becoming obsessed with going online myself now to look at them and tell myself i'm not as attractive to him as all the women he looks at with huge boobs. every time we are intimate all i can think is he's probably wishing my boobs were like some of the ones he has been looking at online. it has completely just turned my whole sense of reality upside down. i feel like i'm going into depression and i am trying to keep up a good front for him because after letting him know for a few days how i was feeling, i felt like there's no sense in brining it up anyomore so he thinks everything is back to normal and fine, but it's totally not fine in my mind. i feel like things will never be the same between us. to top this off, i'm almost 3 months pregnant with our first child and now every day am thinking about how gross my body is going to be and he will be even less attracted to me once i have saggy lifeless breasts and stretch marks. i never had these thought before, i just thought he loved my body and would hopefully be ok with the changes but now i feel like i am not even happy about being pregnant any more. i'm just obsessing about wanting to have the perfect body for him and have it look like these women online that he likes. you could say i went from feeling very secure in his feelings about me to being completely insecure and thinking he probably has to fantasize about huge boobs just to be intimate with me. i know i'm driving myself crazy but i can't stop these thoughts! i am starting to feel like what else is he doing that i dont know about? has he been going to strip clubs after work or looking for other women. i dont think most people out there reading this grasp the amount of mental devastation this has caused.


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## IndiaInk

LOL

Argghh...well I tried my best...i really did

Reread Lamaga's latest post until that sinks in...she's absolutely right

I shouldn't do this...but I can't help myself

So here's one quote from the great Marcus Aurelius and then I will step out of your thread...

_"If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment."_


My Translation as it pertains to your situation:

_"You are free to allow this porn situation to make you feel as miserable as you want. Or not. It's 100% *YOUR CHOICE*"_

I'm sure you'll disagree. "No, no.. I_ can't help_ how this makes *me* feel."

In fact...you are the *ONLY ONE *who can choose how you want to let this affect you.

(Oh and this is one of life's greatest (and hardest) lessons in general...better to start learning it sooner rather than later....and admittedly, a lot of people will never learn it)


(also note...negative self-absorption is STILL self-absorption 
(took me a long time to learn that)....you're making something that had absolutely nothing to with you....all about yourself...can you get over your self a little bit? c'mon now)

You opened Pandora's here...you can't close it again. 

Move on or don't

It's totally your choice

Whether you realize it or not


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## betrayed32

thanks all for your comments. i dont think i am strong minded enough to actually choose to get over it. i am starting to feel a deep hatred and resentment towards my husband and if i weren't pregnant, i would have already told him i want a divorce. but thanks again to all. at least now i know that probably 99.9 percent of women out there would probably have no problem with this, and i am in that 0.01 percent that can't "choose" to let it go.


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## 50Something

I sympathize with your situation. Like a lot of guys, I'm a huge breast fan and occasionally visit websites that cater to men of our persuasion. My wife used to be large-breasted, but had a reduction years before I met her. It does make me sad to think of what could have been if we'd had the chance to love each other before. But I did marry her anyway and I don't regret it. If he says he loves you and his sex drive is strong, you should believe him. He's just a normal male who let his guard down. Damm those smart phones!


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## dubbizle

This is just an excuse because if this is all it takes for you to want a divorce you should not be togethre in the first place. 

You want to get back at him find a site that has guys with HIUGE penises leave it on so he see it and that will get to him or sit dow with him look at the porn and mention ever guy that has a huge penise/bigger then his and he will stop with the breasts.

But once again even if you are prego you just need to split now because there will be much bigger situations in life/marriage then this and you can't handle this.


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## Freak On a Leash

Posse said:


> I love my new 2012 pickup truck.
> 
> I could have gotten a sport car if I wanted, but I didn't want that. I wanted the pickup truck I got. I absolutely love it. It is the best driving, most comfortable vehicle I have ever owned. It has bells and whistles on it that I could never get in a sports car or a motorcycle. I couldn't be more thrilled with the truck. It has a Cadillac-smooth ride (no small feat for a truck), has excellent cargo capacity, and is downright awesome to behold. I get multiple compliments on it daily. I wouldn't ever want to get rid of it for a sports car or a motorcycle. Driving it is pure joy, and is a thrill every time I get behind the wheel.
> 
> I still like looking at sports cars and motorcycles, though.


Yeah, I love my Jeep Wrangler but that doesn't mean that when a Ferrari or Vette drives by I don't look at it and think "wow, hot car!" I'd still keep my Jeep though even if I got a hot sports car. :smthumbup:

I'm a 34D and I think I look pretty hot. Any bigger wouldn't look good IMO. I had a boyfriend who was like your husband. He LOVED big breasts. He thought my friend, who was much bigger than I but chubbier, was hot. I wouldn't have wanted to look like her. She was a size 16 and I was a 6. :rofl: But he loved those breasts she had. Once I gave him a coffee cup that was just a pair of breasts and we laughed over that. 

Another time I was at the beach with one of my girlfriend and he was with us. This girl with huge breasts was walking towards us on the beach. I said to my friend" Check out Dave" and there he was looking at her with his tongue hanging out and then he glanced over at me and my friend and I were cracking up. He started blushing. Ever seen a 6'2" guy blush? It's pretty damn funny. 

Guys are just like that. My boyfriend used to say "Just cuz I'm on a diet doesn't mean I can't look at the menu". 

I used to say in return "I don't care where you get your appetite, as long as you eat at home." 

Try not to take your husband too seriously. In fact, I'd say get a push up bra and some sexy lingerie and show him that he can get some serious action at home! :smthumbup:

Be his sexy and hot girlfriend, not his nagging and jealous wife.


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## Freak On a Leash

Oh great..this thread is like 6 months old and poor Betrayed is popping out a baby and probably needs to lose 20lbs of baby fat but her breasts are a lot bigger. 

I hope she got over this. She seemed rather obsessed about it but maybe it was the hormones. Prego women often go a bit insane. Ask me how I know...


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## DjangoJr

betrayed32 said:


> ok, so the other day my husband accidentally left his phone at home when he went to work. He has done this before and i have never looked through his phone or had the urge to, but for some reason on that particular day something told me to go through his internet history. I honestly didn't really think i would find anything, but in his history i found tens of dozens (if not hundreds) of times he had logged on to various pornography sites and all of them were of women with HUGE breasts. when i say huge, i don't mean like a D cup - i mean these women literally all had breasts the size of my head. And some of the sites were just of women with huge breasts taking off their tops and touching or shaking their breasts,etc. I confronted him about it when he got home and after not being able to speak for a while, he said he was so sorry and he would never do it again. i asked him how long this had been going on and he said since he got his new phone that has internet (which i think has been about a year.) i feel so hurt and like he is not attracted to me, although he says he is happy with my body. I am a 34D, but i feel so insecure now that i have seen what kind of breasts actaully turn him on. I am trying really hard to move on, but i think about this all the time and i don't know how to get over it. I would like to hear from anyone out there who can tell me if this is normal guy behavior, or if i should be worried.



Does he love your breasts?


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## goodwife4

have an E cup and my hubby still looks at other womens breasts, i tell him 50 % of them arent real ...... but it still hurts


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## Paullie

I have to say the men are visually driven when if come to the oposite sex, this is instictual. So a man looking at porn is nothing to be concerned about. Most men like the big tits and this to is encoded in the DNA/hormones/ and instinct. If thats what it takes for him then go with it, dont fight it cause that cant be helped. What concerns me about your post is the lack of trust that you have in each other. Looking through his/her phone is never a good idea. Guys likewise going through thier purse, checking thier internet use, this is stalking behavior and it has to do with your own insecurities. Wemen have the insecurities but most often this is the man doing this. This suspicion will only deepen with time and eventually leads to emotional and late physical abuse. Think about counciling.


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## ShawnD

Men like giant tits because they are an indicator of fertility and hormone levels.
Breast size is strongly correlated to BMI, height, and weight. That sounds redundant, but it's not. A taller woman with the same BMI will be heavier and have larger breasts. Breast size is affected by hormones and other things. They can be bigger if:
-high level sof insulin like growth factor
-high levels of estradiol
-high levels of progesterone
-lower levels of testosterone (this is why body builders have small breasts)
-increased levels of prolactin
-increased levels of luteinizing hormone
-low levels of follicle-stimulating hormone
-low levels of endogenous progesterone 

Large boobs and wide hips are strong signs of being healthy and fertile. That's why men like these things.


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## Eöl

Hello, 

I just wanted to answer because I too had a similar obsession. I still actually do from time to time but a lot less nowadays. My own woman has large breasts you would think that would "cure" some unsatisfaction? it doesn't. I believe that from my standpoint, it is no big deal, because to me it is only fantasy. I wouldn't actually cheat on my girl for another women even if she had big breats or whatever, it's just some lust I have in my mind. I actually believe I am a very balanced person. Fantasy is ok, everyone has that within. As long as realizing your fantasies hurts no one, that too is ok. But he actually be like me and not want to realize anything, just feed that lust a little. But you can't be mad at him for having fantasies. That is 100% human. 

Hope this helps


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## Ignis

You should talk a lot. It is important for him to reflect about his actions and know the reasons why he is attracted to pornography.

Please, understand, that this is not about you! Those ladies he is watching are not what it seems. I mean, they turn him on, but there is something else, deeper, that pushing him into such actions.

Talk, talk, talk...


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## jenifadesu

Ignis said:


> You should talk a lot. It is important for him to reflect about his actions and know the reasons why he is attracted to pornography.
> 
> Please, understand, that this is not about you! Those ladies he is watching are not what it seems. I mean, they turn him on, but there is something else, deeper, that pushing him into such actions.
> 
> Talk, talk, talk...


It's been way too long since the last post to this thread, but I'm new and have been checking out the site when I came across this thread. Ignis has a strong point - when there is an _obsession_ with porn in whatever form, a deeper reason exists. It's time to hash things out.

Not to sound mean, but Betrayed has had a taste of how smaller breasted women feel when their guys always look at well, all big breasted women.

While a lot of people are justifying the behavior and saying that, well, this is just what guys do, I'm going to say that there's a limit to everything. It's okay to obsess with giant tits and check out porn sites once in a while, but when it gets to the point that your partner is uncomfortable or unhappy with it, then you have a problem and potentially your relationship is on the line. If you're single - knock yourself out on internet porn sites or whatever, but being married means that both sides might have to make sacrifices for the sake of something greater.

It's easy to brush off someone's concerns with a simple, "that's the way it is," but if there's something deeper or more complicated within their relationship that we don't know about, then we don't have the right to take it so lightly.

Maybe it's as simple as Betrayed (and many women like her) having to come to terms with the fact that her husband likes to look at giant tits. Hand-in-hand, her husband might need to tone down the ogling of the porn sites and start paying more attention to what his in-the-flesh, loving wife has to offer him -contact with *gasp* real boobs. 

I'm sure there are guys out there whose egos would be mighty bruised if their significant other was obsessing with huge dongs on hundreds of websites, especially if their package is smaller in comparison. They might be wondering why she's so interested, and worrying if they've got what it takes to please her. Some guys won't give a damn, as long as they can still get some at the end of the day. Man or woman, it can go both ways.


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## Mr The Other

You raise a number of good points. It is also worth considering that women will look at mens' browsing history occasionally.

I would say that it is not as though he was doing so in the living room, it was discreetly on his mobile phone, but I would assume my wife would check that.

Possibly, a comparison other than women looking at endless pictures of huge dongs would be keeping tabs on your Possibles list of men on Facebook. It is actually slightly ****ty behaviour and not really OK, but women do it. As long as it is discreet, looking the other way is not a bad policy.


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## HuggyBear

This whole section is about addiction.

A guy looking at "dirty pictures" doesn't have a problem unless it's interfering with his family, job, finances, or social life. It doesn't sound like any of that is happening here... on his end.

However, it sounds like the real problem is that this woman can't stop thinking about this, and it is seriously affecting her, and her family, by extension.

It sounds like even if the guy stopped, or even had his eyes poked out, the woman would STILL have a problem with something he can't even do. She needs some kind of intensive therapy. I hope she's gotten better since this all was posted.


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## Jung_admirer

betrayed32 said:


> you are all right in your comments that i probably came on here to get justification for how i feel. i don't get it and yes, i am completely utterly traumatized. i literally think about it all day, go to sleep thinking about it, dream about it, wake up in the middle of the night thinking about it, first thing i think in the morning.. i see huge breasts in my mind all the time now and i think am becoming obsessed with going online myself now to look at them and tell myself i'm not as attractive to him as all the women he looks at with huge boobs. every time we are intimate all i can think is he's probably wishing my boobs were like some of the ones he has been looking at online. it has completely just turned my whole sense of reality upside down. i feel like i'm going into depression and i am trying to keep up a good front for him because after letting him know for a few days how i was feeling, i felt like there's no sense in brining it up anyomore so he thinks everything is back to normal and fine, but it's totally not fine in my mind. i feel like things will never be the same between us. to top this off, i'm almost 3 months pregnant with our first child and now every day am thinking about how gross my body is going to be and he will be even less attracted to me once i have saggy lifeless breasts and stretch marks. i never had these thought before, i just thought he loved my body and would hopefully be ok with the changes but now i feel like i am not even happy about being pregnant any more. i'm just obsessing about wanting to have the perfect body for him and have it look like these women online that he likes. you could say i went from feeling very secure in his feelings about me to being completely insecure and thinking he probably has to fantasize about huge boobs just to be intimate with me. i know i'm driving myself crazy but i can't stop these thoughts! i am starting to feel like what else is he doing that i dont know about? has he been going to strip clubs after work or looking for other women. i dont think most people out there reading this grasp the amount of mental devastation this has caused.


Fantasy or fetish is about play, something that is temporary and many times transitory. As adults, we separate our fantasy from reality (or you find yourself in a padded cell). Your DH may want to engage this fantasy with you, but he does not want this to extend into reality (as mentioned by others). 

It's easy to allow your mind to wonder about a partner's motives. A female partner once refused to go clean shaven because she intimated her partner wanted a little girl. The partner responded he just didn't like getting hair in his mouth. Be gentle with yourself and your DH ... play is just that ... play. Kindest regards-


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## Mr The Other

Unfortunately, the OP is from 2012. Her last post on here was still upset and angry. I hope she has more perspective now.


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## CharlotteMcdougall

betrayed32 said:


> thanks for the reply. I completely get what you're saying. and honestly, if he had just been looking at random porn sites, i probably wouldn't have cared. it's just the fact that ALL the sites he went to were strictly of women with enormous breasts. maybe if there had been a little variety in what he was looking at it wouldnt have been so hurtful. its just the fact that now i know that's his "thing" which i dont have. its hard to accept..


A D cup is far from small. Remember that when you feel insecure. If you had small breasts, I could understand why your husband's porn habits would be upsetting. Since this is not the case, I believe that you are overreacting. 

Sometimes I love looking at pictures of very muscular men. It doesn't mean that I am not attracted to my husband.


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## achola

Huge breast are awesome i love them especially for BBW.


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## Stevenj

Eöl said:


> Hello,
> 
> I just wanted to answer because I too had a similar obsession. I still actually do from time to time but a lot less nowadays. My own woman has large breasts you would think that would "cure" some unsatisfaction? it doesn't. I believe that from my standpoint, it is no big deal, because to me it is only fantasy. I wouldn't actually cheat on my girl for another women even if she had big breats or whatever, it's just some lust I have in my mind. I actually believe I am a very balanced person. Fantasy is ok, everyone has that within. As long as realizing your fantasies hurts no one, that too is ok. But he actually be like me and not want to realize anything, just feed that lust a little. But you can't be mad at him for having fantasies. That is 100% human.
> 
> Hope this helps


Milk with the cookies is a good thing.


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## bkaydezz

Yea. He is a jerk. 

Just walk around topless every chance you get and see how he 
reacts!


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## bestwife

I go through whole thread and I want to know how its going? What about your husband? Still looking for that big breasts?


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## goodwife4me

I agree with most everything above. My wife felt similar for a while. I kept telling her "I' with you!" She finally dealt with it somehow. It was a wonderful marriage, and she was a wonderful wife. We were together practically 24/7. She passed away a while back. I miss her dearly. And I still love big boobs. Your reality is he loved you enough to marry you. Many men just never marry and never commit. Good luck!


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## jimrich

betrayed32 said:


> I would like to hear from anyone out there who can tell me if this is normal guy behavior, or if i should be worried.


I am a guy who "likes" large breasts, not HUGE ones, but I would NEVER let that interest ruin my relationship with my modestly built wife because the love and respect we share over-rides anything about body styles/shapes. 
I see you as dealing with two separate issues here. 
1. Your own insecurity and jealousy of other women's "stuff"....
2. The very bad and offensive behavior of your husband. 
Of the two, the easiest one to fix is your own bad and inadequate self esteem and self worth by just working on a few self esteem and self respect techniques so google: self esteem and get started fixing yours.
Next, your husband's behavior. 
If he is blatantly disrespectful of you by drooling over the parts of other women and neglecting you, that is something you will need to confront. If he OCCASIONALLY looks at other women's parts but gives you adequate attention, then it's just a normal male thing to notice and appreciate what ALL women have. 
It's a matter of degree or respect and my wife and I worked it out so that we could "look at" other people down at the beach, etc. WITHOUT becoming angry, frightened or hysterical - so long as we did this "looking" with respectful moderation. It would be healthy if he has pictures, etc. that are NOT secrets from you and allows you to check out what he is looking at and why - not to monitor him but to let it be openly available to both of you. Keeping secrets in a relationship is DEADLY! :surprise:


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## EleGirl

Zombie thread


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## browser

jimrich said:


> I am a guy who "likes" large breasts, not HUGE ones, but I would NEVER let that interest ruin my relationship


 @jimrich,

Are you a guy who "likes" zombie threads?

Because that seems to be the case.

Maybe you could lot let that interest intefere with the rest us because it's getting really freaking annoying.


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