# Success?



## endymion (Oct 1, 2009)

New to the forum - but then I'm fairly new to being separated too. Having one of those rough nights (you guys know the ones I mean), and just wondering something. Has anyone on the forum had a separation end successfully? I don't mean you end up empowered or stronger or a better person, but I'd love hear from someone who turned a separation into a marriage again, and made it last. 
Anyone?


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## knortoh (Sep 5, 2009)

sorry that you are having a bad time
and I think I have read stories like that on this forum...
I actually laughed when I read what you wrote -
about the ending up a better person -
I know what you mean when you write that
sometimes it just seems like ?????????
I'll just take getting back together thank you very much! 


There's a reconciliation thread - have you looked on that?

YOU obviously have HOPE for reconciliation...many of us on this forum do -

and there are some amazing stories of people finding strength and acting out of love despite very trying circumstances ....


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## endymion (Oct 1, 2009)

I do have hope for reconciliation - and I'm doing my best. Space helps, time helps, but it's certain nights that get to me. Like tonight. 

The thing of -
"sometimes it just seems like ?????????
I'll just take getting back together thank you very much!"
is totally true. 

I was okay, now am struggling. 

And I hope that people who get back together and live happily ever after are too busy enjoying their lives and enjoying their spouses to come back to this forum, because the recon thread is kinda small.

Thanks for the reply though knortoh, I've read through your thread and know what you're going through. I know the feeling of "I'm okay. I'll be okay - I'm feeling good today" before the crashes come back for a while. The ups and downs are the worst, aren't they?


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## wren (Aug 19, 2009)

The ups and downs can be exhausting. But you have found a good support system through this site.


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## endymion (Oct 1, 2009)

That's very true. This place has been the reason I decided to have a complete break away from my W to let her (and me) sort some things out, and it's been totally the right choice.


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## wren (Aug 19, 2009)

The letting go process can be good for you and for the marriage. It is damned challenging though. I wish you good luck!


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## Corpuswife (Apr 24, 2009)

I think you are right..there are folks that separate and go back into their marriage. Either they are too busy living their lives and working on their marriages or they end up ending it (in my guess). 

The reconciliation thread is new...not many posts. Many are very close to reconciliation see "breaking down the walls" post.


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## knortoh (Sep 5, 2009)

Yes E the up and downs are brutal to live through - guess it's why they call it a rollercoster -and why so many of us just hope for 'peace' in one form or another 

like many here I had never experienced pain like this in my life 

I experinced it at times as a form of torture - it was 'physical' with me 

the way I have dealt with it is through lots of exercise 

and time does start to heal the really raw wounds....


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