# NOT SURE YET please help!!!



## HEADENDTECH (Nov 8, 2009)

Hello, my wife has a friend who is a gay woman they have know each other for about 10 years I just happen to be going through some emails I saw one sent by her ,not my wife that pretty much said to her listen to the words of the abba song take a chance on me ..did you have a chance to read them???? i DIDnot see any replies on my wife side to her about this i checked...doeint mean it was not erased though i am very angry on just the thought of this...So with that i ask her yesterday ooo Unknow your friend lisa is she trying to be a little to nice...????? Not telling her a saw the email. AND my wife said no......you have nothing to be woirried about...she went on to said i told her a long time ago i was not interested in her...now i have a gay friend at work who is a girl and i dont tell her im not interested in her it where just firends and why would i say that uno.....I am still fuming about this ,losing sleep ..I want to believe her but why would her friend put that in her email...now this is my wifes other email account that was left open by accident that i dont normally see....I am ver yupset over this it might be nothing but I still am...


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## manchild (Nov 9, 2009)

tough call, telling her you saw her friends message tells her you opened and scanned her private mail...........is there really privacy in a marriage? There should be the expectation of 'openness' the whole "if there's nothing to hide then there's nothing to be embarrassed to share" componenet to the relationship

since you've already broached the subject of her female 'suiter/stalker' you might just ask instead of asking her if she is engaged in an emotional affair if there is something that that woman can offer your wife that you cannot, some specific care or need that a woman can offer that you haven't or can't.........then tell her that you want to be everything to her and you can tell her that you are concerned that you aren't doing enough

that alone will tell her that you want to fill any gaps in caregiving that the other woman is attempting to breach........and it opens the dialogue

good luck!


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## HEADENDTECH (Nov 8, 2009)

thanks so much,
I didnot tell her i saw the email ,I JUST ASKED HER IF HER FRIEND WAS BEING A LITTLE TO FRIENDLY WITH HER...AND went from there...I my opion she should confide in me no others, but getting back to the subject, I found the email to her a little to much once i read the lyrics to the song i got really upset.... and was not sure how to put it to her /but i did leave out the scanning of the emails which in my case was totally inocoent becasue she left it open and i was going on the comp for other things..Her friend used to be a delivery person for ups suprise and her old work place and they bacame friends back then , but why would she say ooo she knows i want nothing like that it really peeves me...


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## HEADENDTECH (Nov 8, 2009)

I would like a female opions on this matter to thanks..


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