# I Don't Know What to Think



## mmelise (Oct 13, 2010)

I am newly married and me and my husband are having all kinds of problems. We both lost our jobs this year and he had to leave the country to see about his parents and some other business. He has a vehicle back home that he wants to sell and be able to bring home some money. But he has been gone since Labor Day and I have been struggling here all alone to pay all the bills. Before he left he made several long distance calls everyday that I was not aware of and when I got the bill there was three pages of long distance call that totaled up to over $300.00. We almost lost our apartment because I got behind in the rent. All of this is causing me to be stressed out and I am depressed and unable to focus on looking for a job. I borrowed some money so that would not get evicted but I still owe more money. All he can say it that is trying to sell his truck and he does not know when he is coming home. 
How am I supposed to live like this I have no money to buy food all I am doing is worrying about bills. When I get my unemployment check the whole thing has to go to bills. I called him this morning to tell him how much I am struggling and he told me that he would call me back because he does not want me to run up the bill. But he is not even paying the bill and I am his wife and if have an emergency that I need to tell him about what is wrong with that. I have not heard from him as of yet, the last time this happened I did not here from him for three days. Then on top of everything else he makes these accusations implying that I may be looking at another man or talking to another man. I am not that kind of a person, how can I think about anything like that when I have all these financial problems. Why should I have to go through all of this by myself what is the point of having a spouse if you can't go through problems together. Thank God for my mother I feel so embarrassed and ashamed. I am a christian and I believe that God does not give us more than we can handle. If this is what the beginning of a marriage is supposed to be like then I just don't know what to do anymore. I feel so abandoned and rejected. I feel like he doesn't care about what I am going through.


----------



## LaceyRain3 (Oct 13, 2010)

Keep in mind that I only know what you've told me so I don't know the entire picture.

But from your own description I am going to have to say you are being used.

By marrying you did he become a citizen?

I don't mean to be unkind. But it is not normal behavior to leave behind a new wife to deal with serious financial issues and then to accuse her about other men. He is the one who left - he is being ridiculous.

I think you should "hope for the best BUT prepare for the worst". Hope that he comes home and everything is all better BUT prepare yourself for what you'd do if he doesn't come home - or if he comes home and is still rude and abusive.

You need to set a time frame of when you will put your foot down and move on from him. Let him know.

I'm sorry dear he doesn't sound like a good man to me.

If I'm being too "doom and gloom" I hope someone else will chime in to give balance.


----------



## mmelise (Oct 13, 2010)

Thank you for your response,

I want to remain positive and hope for the BEST!!!!. I believe in a way we are all being used whether it is on a job, relationships, family members etc. I have come to realize that there are no perfect relationships or marriages. We are all dysfunctional to a certain extent. I will just put my trust in GOD and know that he loves me no matter what. Everyone will have to give an account when they are no longer on this earth of what they done. So that is my peace and I will be forgiving, understanding and put my trust in God not man. 

By the way he called and said that he will try and send me some money tomorrow and that he will come home soon (whatever that means). 

God Will Provide


----------

