# Interfaith Marriage



## Amarah

Im Christian married to a Muslim man. Before our wedding, I made it clear to him that I will not convert to Islam and he agreed. We were so happy during our first year but things change after that. He demanded me to wear clothes from neck to toe (but not hijab) even during summer and we always argue because of that. I compromise by changing my clothing style but he wants more.Now, he wants me to use a shawl always. Another thing is the food. He dont want me to eat any food that theres no halal code in it. We cannot even eat out. I talked to him many times that we must understand each other as we have different culture and religion but he was so close minded. He never appreciated my sacrifices. He just want me to change.Im so frustrated, exhausted and unhappy.Can someone give me any advice?


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## arbitrator

*In the vast majority of these cases, this is exactly how it's going to ultimately play out!

I also see that you have yet another thread that is very closely related and for simplicity sake, I'd highly recommend that you have them merged into one!

At this juncture, I'm in tacit agreement with many other of my TAM cohorts that an annulment or divorce is going to be about your only logical way out!

Get with a good family lawyer post haste and start this process before things worsen!

*


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## Diana7

You have made a terrible decision marrying this man, and it will get far worse when you have children. If you are serious about your faith why did you even think of marrying him? 

I think you must regrettably end this marriage before you have children. You will have no choice about how to bring them up.


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## manfromlamancha

My advice to you would be a lot more useful if I knew what ethnicities/nationalites we are talking about here and also where do you live? By the way its going to get a hell of a lot worse when kids arrive (trust me on this)!


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## Openminded

He's not going to change. The situation will only intensify. That leaves you with two choices: stay or leave.


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## Ynot

My advice would be to get out while you still can. My next advice would be stop allowing any man fairy tales to get in the way of your own happiness. Apparently you didn't believe on one enough to not marry some one who believed in a different version of the fairy tale, so why let it stop you from being happy.


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## SunCMars

You belong to a reiigion, Chritianity.

He belongs to what 'some' would call a cult.

It is one thing to voluntarily act on the dicates of your religion.

It is another thing to be 'compelled' to act on the dicatates of one's religion.

You can be a casual Christian.
You cannot be a casual Muslim. Especially, not as a women. The peer pressure can be ovewhelming.


As a Muslim man, no one is getting in your face, your place, or your space.
As a Muslim woman, the opposite.


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## Steve1000

Amarah said:


> Im Christian married to a Muslim man. Before our wedding, I made it clear to him that I will not convert to Islam and he agreed. We were so happy during our first year but things change after that. He demanded me to wear clothes from neck to toe (but not hijab) even during summer and we always argue because of that. I compromise by changing my clothing style but he wants more.Now, he wants me to use a shawl always. Another thing is the food. He dont want me to eat any food that theres no halal code in it. We cannot even eat out. I talked to him many times that we must understand each other as we have different culture and religion but he was so close minded. He never appreciated my sacrifices. He just want me to change.Im so frustrated, exhausted and unhappy.Can someone give me any advice?


This is another version of bait and switch. I know a man from Iraq who married a lady who was not religious. He is a very secular Muslim and they have had a fun 20-year marriage. Now in their 50's, they still go out to bars on their weekly date night. Therefore, while religious upbringing is an important factor, a perhaps bigger factor in my opinion is that your husband is uptight, controlling, inconsiderate, and unfair.


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## maktub

Personally, I think often times people make sweeping generalizations about Muslims/Islam and Arabic countries without really knowing as much as they think they do. 

I am an American woman who was raised Catholic but I do not belong to any organized religion as an adult. I believe in and am well educated in sciences--the pope would convert to Islam before I'd ever believe the "stories" in any holy text, let alone practice any religion. Before you get too angry with me, I would be considered "agnostic". I do not know or claim to know if god does or does not exist but I do believe people have the right to believe and follow any religion they choose. I may not agree with your religious beliefs but I also do not judge people based on them either. 

More to the point....

I am dating a wonderful Iraqi Muslim man. YES, he is an American citizen who works, pays taxes and is a productive member of society. He was born in Iraq and lived there until shortly after the war. He was forced to leave Iraq because the war dismantled any government control which led to the destruction of the country. Forced to leave Iraq yes. because my boyfriend and his family lived under the very imminent real threat of death, kidnapping, torture, rape and beheadings by the fundamentalist groups (aka terrorists like Al-Queda) who invaded and established what the Americans failed to do--control power and their own form of government. 

My Muslim boyfriend moved at first to Syria because he feared the same "Muslims" the rest of the world fears. Since the Syrian government would not let any Iraqi work, his family moved to different countries in Europe. After living in Norway for a few years, my boyfriend moved to the same little town in New Jersey as I had been living at the time. 

I apologize for the tangent....

My point was to emphasize that he was born raised and lived in an Arab country well into adulthood. "westernized" he was not but also far from a woman-beating, close-minded, uneducated, controlling, domineering, judgmental, kill all "infidels" generalizations of Muslim men. People fail to realize millions of Iraqis are Christian and millions are Muslim. They went to the same schools, lived in the same towns and interacted with each other without issue. 

True, radical fundamentalist Islam is not a religion and their members are not Muslims or at least they do not represent, practice or preach true Islam just like Warren Jeffs is a radical fundamentalist Christian and his followers are brainwashed in a cult led by a child rapist from his prison cell. There is no greater motivator than fear. These fundamentalist group leaders use very similar tactics to control their members.

Whereas Islam, Christianity and Judaism are all Abrahamic religions. They all believe in the Old Testament of the Bible or the Torah and Muslims everything about Jesus as Christians except for his divinity (and resurrection).
A Christian, Muslim and Jew all believe in Adam and Eve, in Noah, in Moses in all of those silly stories in a holy book of a god more violent than the one ever mentioned in the Quran. (this is not a judgment, it is a fact)

_________

My boyfriend is Muslim, he prays 5 times on most days, he does not attend services every single Friday, he does not try to convert me to Islam nor will he EVER be successful in doing so. According to Islam, a Muslim is not forbidden from marrying a non-Muslim. According to Islam, anyone who converts to the religion for a reason like marriage not because they truly in their heart want to convert, is NOT considered Muslim and doing so is a SIN. Some will say the person has to "be of the book" meaning Christian or Jewish in order to marry a Muslim. Again, not true...the most important tenant of Islam is Allah is God....as in it is a MONOTHEISTIC religion. Like that Christian Commandment that speaks of not worshiping idols. Same deal. Belief in one God.....

I am a white blonde hair blue eyed American , non-religious, tattooed, divorced, single mother. I am what many would think a Muslim, especially an "off the boat" arab muslim man would consider a she-devil. He is already a citizen, he makes good money (and hello he is from an oil country) and we have been dating for almost a year but never had sex (we are intimate and do other sexual acts but not actual intercourse).
- I'm not being used for a visa
- I'm on SSDI so I'm certainly not being used for my money
- He has his own car and home so I am not being used for any material things
- We have not had sex so I am not his *****
- We plan to live together before we would ever get married--something we both want but want to be sure it is best for both of us because we genuinely love each other. 


Do two people ever agree on every single thing in life? No. I accept his religion and I have even studied it a lot not because I believe in it but because it is important to him. He does not love me for being Muslim or Christian or for any other reason than for who I am as a person and vice versa. He is more than Muslim, he is more than Iraqi....he is a beautiful, intelligent, caring, loyal, emotive, sensitive, generous, accepting, tolerant, peaceful, loving, man. THAT is who I love.....that's who he is. 


I was married to a blonde haired blue eyed Catholic American man who abused me in every way imaginable for years. He beat me down until I believed I was nothing but dirt. He broke my bones, would not allow me to work, handed me a daily chore list, kept me literally trapped in our home, he lied, he cheated, he spit in my face, he was finally successful in getting me pregnant against my will, he took his anger out on me and beat, punched and kicked me until the life he forced inside of me then circled the toilet that he also made me flush. 

My ex-husband was a psychopath. It wouldn't have mattered if he was Muslim, Hindu or Christian....he was a textbook psychopath. 

My boyfriend is my best friend and the love of my life. He is the reason I know what love really is--my ex husband who was raised in the same religion as myself, a religion that is supposed to follow the peaceful tolerant accepting teachings of their god (jesus taught love, acceptance, forgiveness and kindness).There was nothing kind or Christian about him and by those standards my Muslim boyfriend follows the teachings of Jesus CHRIST. He has cried many times hearing about the terrible things my ex-husband did to me (and if you asked my ex, he loved me). I have grown more as a person, as a partner, as mother, and as a professional in the last year than I have the 35 prior. I am treated equal, I am loved, I am supported and I feel safe.....from a Muslim Man. And HE is the terrorist?, please. 

My ex-husband was a close minded, selfish, cruel, psycho and my boyfriend is an open-minded, selfless, kind, accepting loving man. Christian and Muslim have nothing at all to do with it. 

I don't believe in the Bible and my Catholic marriage failed. I don't believe in the Quran and my relationship with a Muslim is amazing, healthy and thriving. 

I was charmed by a bad man and I was loved by a good man

end of story. 

Some people are just selfish controlling a**holes who think they do no wrong. People who try to control their partner whether they use their fist or twist the teachings of their religion.....any justification works for them. It's about control, not Islam. It's an insecure man who is terrified of losing his partner and justifies his controlling behaviors.


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## manfromlamancha

maktub said:


> Personally, I think often times people make sweeping generalizations about Muslims/Islam and Arabic countries without really knowing as much as they think they do.
> 
> I am an American woman who was raised Catholic but I do not belong to any organized religion as an adult. I believe in and am well educated in sciences--the pope would convert to Islam before I'd ever believe the "stories" in any holy text, let alone practice any religion. Before you get too angry with me, I would be considered "agnostic". I do not know or claim to know if god does or does not exist but I do believe people have the right to believe and follow any religion they choose. I may not agree with your religious beliefs but I also do not judge people based on them either.
> 
> More to the point....
> 
> I am dating a wonderful Iraqi Muslim man. YES, he is an American citizen who works, pays taxes and is a productive member of society. He was born in Iraq and lived there until shortly after the war. He was forced to leave Iraq because the war dismantled any government control which led to the destruction of the country. Forced to leave Iraq yes. because my boyfriend and his family lived under the very imminent real threat of death, kidnapping, torture, rape and beheadings by the fundamentalist groups (aka terrorists like Al-Queda) who invaded and established what the Americans failed to do--control power and their own form of government.
> 
> My Muslim boyfriend moved at first to Syria because he feared the same "Muslims" the rest of the world fears. Since the Syrian government would not let any Iraqi work, his family moved to different countries in Europe. After living in Norway for a few years, my boyfriend moved to the same little town in New Jersey as I had been living at the time.
> 
> I apologize for the tangent....
> 
> My point was to emphasize that he was born raised and lived in an Arab country well into adulthood. "westernized" he was not but also far from a woman-beating, close-minded, uneducated, controlling, domineering, judgmental, kill all "infidels" generalizations of Muslim men. People fail to realize millions of Iraqis are Christian and millions are Muslim. They went to the same schools, lived in the same towns and interacted with each other without issue.
> 
> True, radical fundamentalist Islam is not a religion and their members are not Muslims or at least they do not represent, practice or preach true Islam just like Warren Jeffs is a radical fundamentalist Christian and his followers are brainwashed in a cult led by a child rapist from his prison cell. There is no greater motivator than fear. These fundamentalist group leaders use very similar tactics to control their members.
> 
> Whereas Islam, Christianity and Judaism are all Abrahamic religions. They all believe in the Old Testament of the Bible or the Torah and Muslims everything about Jesus as Christians except for his divinity (and resurrection).
> A Christian, Muslim and Jew all believe in Adam and Eve, in Noah, in Moses in all of those silly stories in a holy book of a god more violent than the one ever mentioned in the Quran. (this is not a judgment, it is a fact)
> 
> _________
> 
> My boyfriend is Muslim, he prays 5 times on most days, he does not attend services every single Friday, he does not try to convert me to Islam nor will he EVER be successful in doing so. According to Islam, a Muslim is not forbidden from marrying a non-Muslim. According to Islam, anyone who converts to the religion for a reason like marriage not because they truly in their heart want to convert, is NOT considered Muslim and doing so is a SIN. Some will say the person has to "be of the book" meaning Christian or Jewish in order to marry a Muslim. Again, not true...the most important tenant of Islam is Allah is God....as in it is a MONOTHEISTIC religion. Like that Christian Commandment that speaks of not worshiping idols. Same deal. Belief in one God.....
> 
> I am a white blonde hair blue eyed American , non-religious, tattooed, divorced, single mother. I am what many would think a Muslim, especially an "off the boat" arab muslim man would consider a she-devil. He is already a citizen, he makes good money (and hello he is from an oil country) and we have been dating for almost a year but never had sex (we are intimate and do other sexual acts but not actual intercourse).
> - I'm not being used for a visa
> - I'm on SSDI so I'm certainly not being used for my money
> - He has his own car and home so I am not being used for any material things
> - We have not had sex so I am not his *****
> - We plan to live together before we would ever get married--something we both want but want to be sure it is best for both of us because we genuinely love each other.
> 
> 
> Do two people ever agree on every single thing in life? No. I accept his religion and I have even studied it a lot not because I believe in it but because it is important to him. He does not love me for being Muslim or Christian or for any other reason than for who I am as a person and vice versa. He is more than Muslim, he is more than Iraqi....he is a beautiful, intelligent, caring, loyal, emotive, sensitive, generous, accepting, tolerant, peaceful, loving, man. THAT is who I love.....that's who he is.
> 
> 
> I was married to a blonde haired blue eyed Catholic American man who abused me in every way imaginable for years. He beat me down until I believed I was nothing but dirt. He broke my bones, would not allow me to work, handed me a daily chore list, kept me literally trapped in our home, he lied, he cheated, he spit in my face, he was finally successful in getting me pregnant against my will, he took his anger out on me and beat, punched and kicked me until the life he forced inside of me then circled the toilet that he also made me flush.
> 
> My ex-husband was a psychopath. It wouldn't have mattered if he was Muslim, Hindu or Christian....he was a textbook psychopath.
> 
> My boyfriend is my best friend and the love of my life. He is the reason I know what love really is--my ex husband who was raised in the same religion as myself, a religion that is supposed to follow the peaceful tolerant accepting teachings of their god (jesus taught love, acceptance, forgiveness and kindness).There was nothing kind or Christian about him and by those standards my Muslim boyfriend follows the teachings of Jesus CHRIST. He has cried many times hearing about the terrible things my ex-husband did to me (and if you asked my ex, he loved me). I have grown more as a person, as a partner, as mother, and as a professional in the last year than I have the 35 prior. I am treated equal, I am loved, I am supported and I feel safe.....from a Muslim Man. And HE is the terrorist?, please.
> 
> My ex-husband was a close minded, selfish, cruel, psycho and my boyfriend is an open-minded, selfless, kind, accepting loving man. Christian and Muslim have nothing at all to do with it.
> 
> I don't believe in the Bible and my Catholic marriage failed. I don't believe in the Quran and my relationship with a Muslim is amazing, healthy and thriving.
> 
> I was charmed by a bad man and I was loved by a good man
> 
> end of story.
> 
> Some people are just selfish controlling a**holes who think they do no wrong. People who try to control their partner whether they use their fist or twist the teachings of their religion.....any justification works for them. It's about control, not Islam. It's an insecure man who is terrified of losing his partner and justifies his controlling behaviors.


Maktub (I will assume you know what your adopted handle means), I am glad that you have found true love with your boyfriend. And yes, this has nothing to do with the Quran or the Bible. And if the point that you are trying to make is that there are good people and bad people in every faith, race, nationality etc. then I whole heartedly agree with you. However, there are a number of things about the middle east, the Islamic faith, the history of the Catholic church and its role in the world etc that you do not appear to know and I sincerely doubt that even your boyfriend would know. Iraq is a fairly young country although the people of the region are some of the oldest in the world.

Just a few take away thoughts that might even alarm your boyfriend:

Iraq in its original form (lets call it a tri state area of Assyria, Babylon and Chaldea) was never Arab! In fact they came up with most of the languages that evolved in the Middle East including Hebrew, Arabic and some of the roots of Aramaic and Syriac. Their own language was largely Akkadian following on from the older Sumerian. Arabic was the language spoken by the Nomadic (largely Bedouin) tribes in the central desert area who were generally referred to as Arabs (in fact Arab is a way of saying nomad). This is where Islam suddenly appeared originating from the head of one of these tribes (the prophet Mohammed). Again very little to do with Iraq. Iraq grew into one of the most capable and intelligent countries in the world with historical developments and discoveries in Physics, Chemistry and Mathematics. In fact they came up with the original terms for these and are accredited with arriving at the need for a zero (0) which really helped Mathematicians. The point I am making is that it was a highly intelligent, educated country until the arrival of the Arabs and their faith. Abraham came from the city of Ur and is accredited with some of the original approaches to mono-deistic religion.
Also until the arrival of Islam, it was a stronghold for Christianity (like Syria) so there was a large Christian population and old Christian heritage in the country. Tariq Aziz one of the most intelligent Prime Ministers in Iraq (during the time of Saddam Hussain) was a Roman Catholic. When old families like mine think of Syria, Lebanon and Iraq, we think of old Christianity. The point is that being an Iraqi comes with a rich heritage of good, educated and intelligent behaviour. It was the arrival of the Arabs that compromised some of this.

Now there are many, many good Iraqi Muslims - good men and women who are level headed, smart, kind and polite. Comes with their upbringing and history. However, the faith does tend to make the men controlling. And some of the things that OP is saying in this thread are very familiar to those of us who have seen it a million times before. The kindness, "westernised" views, openness etc is all very well during dating and courting and sometimes even up to the arrival of the first child. That is when Islamic programming tends to kick in - this is because like all parents, we want to do the best for our children and want a moral structure that is sound and many Muslims go back to being Muslims when faced with the birth of a child and no real experience of anything else. In the case of OP this behaviour seems to have started just after the marriage, so that would make me think that this was the plan all along. I am not saying this is the case with your boyfriend but is unfortunately true in a great many cases. It sounds like you had a bad first marriage and are now using the fact that your new relationship is good to defend Islam - I understand and applaud the sentiment and good for you - but you really need to have a lot more knowledge and experience before you can do this effectively.

As for attacking the Catholic Church, I can write a whole treatise on what was good and bad about it and its very important role in evolving the civilised world. That's for another time and place


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## personofinterest

maktub said:


> Personally, I think often times people make sweeping generalizations about Muslims/Islam and Arabic countries without really knowing as much as they think they do.
> 
> I am an American woman who was raised Catholic but I do not belong to any organized religion as an adult. I believe in and am well educated in sciences--the pope would convert to Islam before I'd ever believe the "stories" in any holy text, let alone practice any religion. Before you get too angry with me, I would be considered "agnostic". I do not know or claim to know if god does or does not exist but I do believe people have the right to believe and follow any religion they choose. I may not agree with your religious beliefs but I also do not judge people based on them either.
> 
> More to the point....
> 
> I am dating a wonderful Iraqi Muslim man. YES, he is an American citizen who works, pays taxes and is a productive member of society. He was born in Iraq and lived there until shortly after the war. He was forced to leave Iraq because the war dismantled any government control which led to the destruction of the country. Forced to leave Iraq yes. because my boyfriend and his family lived under the very imminent real threat of death, kidnapping, torture, rape and beheadings by the fundamentalist groups (aka terrorists like Al-Queda) who invaded and established what the Americans failed to do--control power and their own form of government.
> 
> My Muslim boyfriend moved at first to Syria because he feared the same "Muslims" the rest of the world fears. Since the Syrian government would not let any Iraqi work, his family moved to different countries in Europe. After living in Norway for a few years, my boyfriend moved to the same little town in New Jersey as I had been living at the time.
> 
> I apologize for the tangent....
> 
> My point was to emphasize that he was born raised and lived in an Arab country well into adulthood. "westernized" he was not but also far from a woman-beating, close-minded, uneducated, controlling, domineering, judgmental, kill all "infidels" generalizations of Muslim men. People fail to realize millions of Iraqis are Christian and millions are Muslim. They went to the same schools, lived in the same towns and interacted with each other without issue.
> 
> True, radical fundamentalist Islam is not a religion and their members are not Muslims or at least they do not represent, practice or preach true Islam just like Warren Jeffs is a radical fundamentalist Christian and his followers are brainwashed in a cult led by a child rapist from his prison cell. There is no greater motivator than fear. These fundamentalist group leaders use very similar tactics to control their members.
> 
> Whereas Islam, Christianity and Judaism are all Abrahamic religions. They all believe in the Old Testament of the Bible or the Torah and Muslims everything about Jesus as Christians except for his divinity (and resurrection).
> A Christian, Muslim and Jew all believe in Adam and Eve, in Noah, in Moses in all of those silly stories in a holy book of a god more violent than the one ever mentioned in the Quran. (this is not a judgment, it is a fact)
> 
> _________
> 
> My boyfriend is Muslim, he prays 5 times on most days, he does not attend services every single Friday, he does not try to convert me to Islam nor will he EVER be successful in doing so. According to Islam, a Muslim is not forbidden from marrying a non-Muslim. According to Islam, anyone who converts to the religion for a reason like marriage not because they truly in their heart want to convert, is NOT considered Muslim and doing so is a SIN. Some will say the person has to "be of the book" meaning Christian or Jewish in order to marry a Muslim. Again, not true...the most important tenant of Islam is Allah is God....as in it is a MONOTHEISTIC religion. Like that Christian Commandment that speaks of not worshiping idols. Same deal. Belief in one God.....
> 
> I am a white blonde hair blue eyed American , non-religious, tattooed, divorced, single mother. I am what many would think a Muslim, especially an "off the boat" arab muslim man would consider a she-devil. He is already a citizen, he makes good money (and hello he is from an oil country) and we have been dating for almost a year but never had sex (we are intimate and do other sexual acts but not actual intercourse).
> - I'm not being used for a visa
> - I'm on SSDI so I'm certainly not being used for my money
> - He has his own car and home so I am not being used for any material things
> - We have not had sex so I am not his *****
> - We plan to live together before we would ever get married--something we both want but want to be sure it is best for both of us because we genuinely love each other.
> 
> 
> Do two people ever agree on every single thing in life? No. I accept his religion and I have even studied it a lot not because I believe in it but because it is important to him. He does not love me for being Muslim or Christian or for any other reason than for who I am as a person and vice versa. He is more than Muslim, he is more than Iraqi....he is a beautiful, intelligent, caring, loyal, emotive, sensitive, generous, accepting, tolerant, peaceful, loving, man. THAT is who I love.....that's who he is.
> 
> 
> I was married to a blonde haired blue eyed Catholic American man who abused me in every way imaginable for years. He beat me down until I believed I was nothing but dirt. He broke my bones, would not allow me to work, handed me a daily chore list, kept me literally trapped in our home, he lied, he cheated, he spit in my face, he was finally successful in getting me pregnant against my will, he took his anger out on me and beat, punched and kicked me until the life he forced inside of me then circled the toilet that he also made me flush.
> 
> My ex-husband was a psychopath. It wouldn't have mattered if he was Muslim, Hindu or Christian....he was a textbook psychopath.
> 
> My boyfriend is my best friend and the love of my life. He is the reason I know what love really is--my ex husband who was raised in the same religion as myself, a religion that is supposed to follow the peaceful tolerant accepting teachings of their god (jesus taught love, acceptance, forgiveness and kindness).There was nothing kind or Christian about him and by those standards my Muslim boyfriend follows the teachings of Jesus CHRIST. He has cried many times hearing about the terrible things my ex-husband did to me (and if you asked my ex, he loved me). I have grown more as a person, as a partner, as mother, and as a professional in the last year than I have the 35 prior. I am treated equal, I am loved, I am supported and I feel safe.....from a Muslim Man. And HE is the terrorist?, please.
> 
> My ex-husband was a close minded, selfish, cruel, psycho and my boyfriend is an open-minded, selfless, kind, accepting loving man. Christian and Muslim have nothing at all to do with it.
> 
> I don't believe in the Bible and my Catholic marriage failed. I don't believe in the Quran and my relationship with a Muslim is amazing, healthy and thriving.
> 
> I was charmed by a bad man and I was loved by a good man
> 
> end of story.
> 
> Some people are just selfish controlling a**holes who think they do no wrong. People who try to control their partner whether they use their fist or twist the teachings of their religion.....any justification works for them. It's about control, not Islam. It's an insecure man who is terrified of losing his partner and justifies his controlling behaviors.


I am thrilled that this has worked for you, but I believe it is obvious that the OP's husband is a very different man from your boyfriend. And she is not agnostic; she is a practicing Christian. So while I agree that generalization is not a good thing, I am not sure what your SO does well can be applied to her controlling husband. I wish it could be.


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## ButWeAreStrange

OP, was there anything that happened recently (or since the first year of marriage) that may have suddenly increased his need to identify his entire life through a religious lens? On a superficial level it sounds like a bait-and-switch type of scenario, but if beforehand he seemed perfectly fine with you maintaining your own religious identity and has only now begun to make gradual but definite demands/changes, could it be that something has happened to cause a sense of insecurity on his end? Any family and friends potentially putting pressure on him from a religious or cultural perspective? 

I am also in an interfaith marriage, though my husband (who was raised Episcopalian but fluctuates between agnostic to militant atheist) understood going into our marriage that the faith I was born into (Vajrayana Buddhism, specifically the Dzgochen lineage) was non-negotiable. He's always known where his own boundaries were in regards to how much he'd interact with me spiritually and knows where he draws the line on his own without it impeding or insulting my spiritual independence. We both have a mutual love and respect for how each other views the concept of existence and have many points of reference that bridge our beliefs onto a common ground (in most cases science). 

Since you both come from Abrahamic backgrounds, are there any points of commonality that you can use to express yourself or meet eye-to-eye on? It could be that he's trying to communicate something through his sudden shift in religious pressure but not know of a better way to do so.


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