# Dazed and Confused



## Brockann (Jul 30, 2020)

I left an abusive marriage just 2 months ago. I really don't know where to begin with needing help - I feel so lost and heartbroken.


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

Oh, I'm sorry -- but at the same time I'm so happy for you that you found the courage to leave! That is a big accomplishment. It is so hard to get out. 

You are just a little lost now. But things are going to get better day by day as you take control of the rest of your life. I can recommend that if you live somewhere they have it, you might want to google the name of your town and then "victims counseling" or "domestic abuse counseling" and see if you find a place to just get in a group or talk through it. But you've done the hardest part already, getting out. You didn't say if you had kids. If so, that will be the most challenging, I guess. Be sure you've seen an attorney and worked out an agreement with a judge's order so the ex can't just do whatever he wants and if you need a restraining order, usually upon divorce from an abuser, judge's will grant that. You should have an attorney to consult with if you possibly can. A domestic abuse counseling service may even know someone that will work with you.


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## Brockann (Jul 30, 2020)

I have children, however he and I did not together. I recently joined an online group called Divorce Recovery but unfortunately there is nothing within 70 miles of me for an actual face to face meeting. I honestly hadn't even thought of any domestic abuse groups and will be looking into those locally for myself and family. 
I have good days and bad days and good and bad within each. For the first time I am putting me first in the right ways and thankfully I have support where I did not think... Correction, where I did not realize I had before in family and friends. Talking took me a while because my embarrassment and shame, having had been an executive at one time in my past life, however that has been freedom for me on so many levels. 
Thank you for taking the time to respond and for the advice.


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## ah_sorandy (Jul 19, 2018)

Brockann said:


> I have children, however he and I did not together. I recently joined an online group called Divorce Recovery but unfortunately there is nothing within 70 miles of me for an actual face to face meeting. I honestly hadn't even thought of any domestic abuse groups and will be looking into those locally for myself and family.
> I have good days and bad days and good and bad within each. For the first time I am putting me first in the right ways and thankfully I have support where I did not think... Correction, where I did not realize I had before in family and friends. Talking took me a while because my embarrassment and shame, having had been an executive at one time in my past life, however that has been freedom for me on so many levels.
> Thank you for taking the time to respond and for the advice.


Opening up and acknowledging that you were a victim of domestic abuse is the first step.

It is better to be away from it for you and your family.

Keep going forward, things will get better.

Best of luck with everything.


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## Brockann (Jul 30, 2020)

Thank you for the encouragement!!!


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

@Brockann, as I say to new members I am so sorry you had to seek us out, but I am glad you found us.

There's plenty of special sub-sections offering advice, plus there is a Social area for relaxation.

Please explore and remember, we are here for you.


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