# Sex within the context of loving marriage



## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

How much attention does sex get in our marriages, compared to other activities and discussions?

We enjoy each other's company, and have a deep connection that goes beyond sex. We talk, laugh!!, and have a harmonious happy home. 

I am also interested in my work, my friends, my spiritual growth, and other topics. Sex is not all there is to me; however, I immensely enjoy it. 

I have learned to enjoy the sex I do have. It is not like the movies and my orgasms don't fall from the sky, I don't have Os every time we have sex. Guess what!! I no longer care! I am getting more comfortable and enjoying what I have, not what I think I should have. 

Therefore, I am free to enjoy all of my marriage, and all of me.


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## Rough Patch Sewing (Apr 18, 2011)

This attitude could be a good way to release yourself from anxiety. My wife and I are learning to seize the day, Carpe Diem! That is enjoy the day and the activities of the day as they have priority in the day. Sometimes sex between us is just not in that priority, but I am sure glad that we normally are on the same page as to these things now.

If I want sex and she does not I still love, message, and cuddle her in bed and know that I am investing in tomorrow.

Is your husband in agreement with your stance? If so it could be a real good thing, in balance.


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## Sawney Beane (May 1, 2011)

Sara Ann said:


> _I have learned to enjoy the sex I do have_. It is not like the movies and my orgasms don't fall from the sky, I don't have Os every time we have sex. Guess what!! I no longer care! I am getting more comfortable and enjoying what I have, not what I think I should have.
> 
> Therefore, I am free to enjoy all of my marriage, and all of me.


Emphasis mine. How? "Enjoying the sex I do have" sounds like quite a profound shift. Did you just sort of wake up and get there, or was it a concious process?


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## Edge (Mar 30, 2011)

I think I am coming to the point where you are. Being honest I sometimes wish there was more sex in my marriage. Most of the time sex is at least a once a week occurrence with sometimes more and a few times less. I found myself being upset about this and it led to a couple fights. I am beginning to realize though that it is not everything. That there is so much more to marriage. And I am finding myself happy with that and with what I do have. I love my wife. I enjoy being with her whether we are sitting on a couch watching a movie or in bed having fun. The fact that we are not in bed having fun as much as my overly active male libido would like does not mean I am not happy. I honestly think I had unrealistic expectations. We were both virgins and I had this idea that we would be having sex multiple times a day and ripping each others clothes off constantly. I am, I hope, becoming more mature and realizing what marriage truly is. At the end of the day all I know is I am a happily married man with a wife I love.


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