# Divorce today



## TheMizz...erable (Aug 14, 2011)

It's been almost 4 full months since wife left. It was hell for the first couple of months but has gotten better. I still have my moments of overwelming sadness. 

Anyway, I have to be in court in less than 3 hours and the divorce will be finalized. After 14 years together, 13 1/2 married, it's about to be "officially" over with. I feel sad about it and I believe the marriage was fixable but she chose to leave and not work on our issues. So that's that.

The wife and I are able to speak and she has brought me food that she's cooked. She brought me food on Thanksgiving too. I still love her and despite everything I would still take her back. Especially since we have a son together.

We've agreed on a settlement so court should be pretty quick. I just hope I can hold it together in court because I am a pretty soft-hearted guy and this is just pretty sad to me. What I am wondering most is, will she speak to me after we leave the court room? What will we say? Will there be a hug? Or nothing?


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## This is me (May 4, 2011)

I am truly sorry to hear your sad news. I hope you can get on with your life quickly. There will be happy days ahead after this storm settles.

I am 1 month into seperation today. She is doing MC with me, but we do not talk much in between. I pray you can mend soon.


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## blueskies30 (Jan 27, 2010)

I'm so sorry!! I am 3 months into our seperation, which is really a divorce. Both of us say we want to reconsile, but there has only been a few hugs. Today we are going for our first MC. We have been to the counselor previously a long time ago.

I'm so sorry for your pain. I am going through the same and today has been the most painful becasue he views sadness as weakness and immaturity. He says I need to be an adult.

I hope you can heal and find some one who will treat you right.


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## TheMizz...erable (Aug 14, 2011)

Well the marriage is officially over. Her lawyer was late so we sat together and talked for a good while. She said something about being hungry and I asked if she'd like to grab something to eat when we were done. She said "sure we can do that...as friends". After it was over we went and ate. It was nice. My two dominant feelings are sadness and...I'm horny for her. What a mix huh?

TiM, I'm glad you're able to go to MC. My wife wouldn't even do that.

blue, If sadness is weakness and immaturity, I am one weak and immature SOB. How can anybody that has a heart not be sad over this stuff? It's brutal.


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## Sparkles422 (Jun 3, 2011)

TheMizz:
My heart and warm wishes go out to you. You stand where I was in July of this year.
However, I was alone since I started the divorce proceedings, no other course of action was available.
It's a hard journey for those of us that really didn't desire it, but had to for dignity and to move on.
I wish you all the best and that your nights are dream free and that you take care of your health. The rest, unfortunately ,is time.


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## Dadof3 (Mar 14, 2011)

TheMizz...erable said:


> Well the marriage is officially over. Her lawyer was late so we sat together and talked for a good while. She said something about being hungry and I asked if she'd like to grab something to eat when we were done. She said "sure we can do that...as friends". After it was over we went and ate. It was nice. My two dominant feelings are sadness and...I'm horny for her. What a mix huh?
> 
> TiM, I'm glad you're able to go to MC. My wife wouldn't even do that.
> 
> blue, If sadness is weakness and immaturity, I am one weak and immature SOB. How can anybody that has a heart not be sad over this stuff? It's brutal.


Did you buy her lunch as you are only friends and after she's put you through this?

Time for tough love now. Don't know how folks can be "friends" with the person in the world that has hurt them most.


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## TheMizz...erable (Aug 14, 2011)

Dadof3 said:


> Did you buy her lunch as you are only friends and after she's put you through this?
> 
> Time for tough love now. Don't know how folks can be "friends" with the person in the world that has hurt them most.


Well I asked her out but didn't say anything about paying. But she didn't offer to pay for hers so I paid. I thought maybe I'd buy mine and she'd buy hers. But no.

I still love her and want to maintain as good of a relationship as I can with her mainly because of our son. But I will not be walked on.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Hope you're doing ok


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## blueskies30 (Jan 27, 2010)

TheMizz...erable said:


> Well the marriage is officially over. Her lawyer was late so we sat together and talked for a good while. She said something about being hungry and I asked if she'd like to grab something to eat when we were done. She said "sure we can do that...as friends". After it was over we went and ate. It was nice. My two dominant feelings are sadness and...I'm horny for her. What a mix huh?
> 
> 
> 
> ...


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## TheMizz...erable (Aug 14, 2011)

Sorry to hear that blue. I was surprised that she ate with me. I just don't picture her letting me give her the physical attention though.


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## blueskies30 (Jan 27, 2010)

I'm sorry to hear about your too. Its really hard when you feel a certain way about your spouse, but they are not giving you the body language that says they feel the same. My husband says he wasnts to reconsile, but he doesn't know what is in the future. He says he loves me, but he just can't get close to me. 

Its starting to really kill me not knowing what he is really really thinking. Althouth last night he said he didn't miss the single life. I was afraid that he might be missing that.

My divorce papers are still there even thiough he says he would hope we can reconsile. So I feel like it can go either way and right now I can't heal to get over him and I can't be happy about the future.


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