# Inappropriate Friendship/ Emotional Affair



## MAKINGSENSEOFIT (Oct 24, 2011)

I hope I can some of what I experienced to help some others on here. I think we all read similar stories to our own and we all have reacted in different ways. The one thing I agree with everyone on is that if you suspect something no matter how hard it is you cannot confront too early. If nothing is going on you're viewed as a suspicious and jerk who doesn't trust her. If there is something at play you need to take to time to gather enough evidence where denial is downright impossible. 

In my case I headed off what I think could've been something in its very early stages between my wife and a male coworker. Now it's not that I wanted my wife to do something but in jumping on things so early with very little evidence it was very easy for my wife to deny everything and pretty much just give me the we're just friends line. 

A few of the things I had found were as follows. This pretty much all occurred over a span of about five weeks or so. It's important to note I didn't really know of this person who was suddenly this great friend. 

1) Numerous texts exchanged between the two throughout the day and evening. This also took place during the weekends. 

2) On two occasions she took my older daughter to meet up with him and his kids on what she called play dates. 

3) I was pretty much lied to on those day and told she was going to meet up with girlfriends and their kids. 

I've gone ballistic on more than one occasion in regards to this and as I think about it later came off looking like a lunatic because I more than likely jumped on things too early. If you suspect you should use the knowledge that you have to your advantage instead of your disadvantage. The bottom line is that at this point my wife or anybody for that matter is going to admit yeah nothing happened yet but were certainly headed that way.


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## Complexity (Dec 31, 2011)

I remember reading one of your earlier threads, it seems like she did the same thing before and she hasn't stopped since you last confronted her . You also mentioned in one of your earlier threads that your wife felt like the marriage was over because you drifted apart so much. 

Marriage is not a 50% endeavour. If your wife isn't emotionally connected to the marriage which is something she's felt for a long time, it's perhaps time to realise that clawing onto something that doesn't exist is futile.


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## DubeGechi (Dec 12, 2010)

The symptoms are very clear, this aint no friendship. This starts as EA and leads to hell. Stay vigilant but dont burn yourself in the process


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