# Divorce



## Dewayne76 (Sep 26, 2012)

Just told my wife for final time that we're getting a D. Int he car, she took my hand, or sorta. She kept bringing her hand back even when we let go for a second, she acted like she didn't want to end it, but when I asked her what SHE wanted... she took a while. She said she wanted me better. Then I asked if she wanted US but with me better, she took a bit. Then she said she wanted it done, that it's not fair to make me wait while she figures it out. She said she wanted me to date if I found someone. 

All I can think about is my daughter. And how this is going to affect her. It kills me to think of that. 

The hurt is back. I can't stand it. if it weren't for my daughter I think I'd just assume eat a bullet. Really. No, not a cry for help, just that's what I'd want. ... kidna what I want now. 

Should've never.. NEVER got married. Never fell in love again. Knew this was bound to happen. We live too long of lives for it not to. 


Don't want to drink, but I don't know of what other way to feel better. To kill the pain. The hurt just comes back but for those minutes or hours.... it's easier. 

...signing off.


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Youre wife is basically a pedophile and a predator. 

Let me tell you something friend.....no way this is the first time she has pulled this stunt. You dont just all of a sudden launch into seducing boys...she is an experienced practitioner. And as soon as you separate she'll start up again.

Divorce her, get rid of her and get her out of your LLC or corporation as soon as possible. If word of what she did with these boys gets back to their parents your company could be sued into the next afterlife. 

Don't look back, don't feel guilty. You did nothing wrong...nothing. Why, WHY should you change? She's the one who is messed up.


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## Dewayne76 (Sep 26, 2012)

They're MEN.. 19. 

I do feel guilty. I treated her like **** so many times. I'ts MY FAULT. 
Had I not been an asshat for so many years this wouldn't have happened. I'm a terrible person. But I'm fixing that. 

I'm leaving now. Thank you all for who responded to my posts. It hurts to much to think about my daughter in a broken family. 

Thank you and good bye. 

I'm just tired of hurting.


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## vi_bride04 (Mar 28, 2012)

I have never considered a 19 yr old to be a man.....


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## Dewayne76 (Sep 26, 2012)

Ok, they're not MEN but they're not 16 either. He's 19 and I just don't get why everyone thinks it's a legal issue. 

I failed. I broke again. I'm still hurting and I truly still want to try and work on it and all she can say is "I don't want this, not right now at least" but she can't tell me why. She doesn't have a reason, just says that's what she feels right now. She says she loves me, but not "like that anymore" and she doesn't hate me, she doesn't want anyone else and she's thought about moving to her gramma's place and taking Jordan. She said she doesn't want to take her away from me. 

Last week when we "tried"... she said that she wanted me, and wanted me to love her. But at walmart when that guy supposedly grabbed her ass and she said she "thought about it" for a second, that must've turned it off for me and her. She said she's afraid she can't commit. Why can't I just LEAVE and be happy? I don't get it. Is it my kid? Do I REALLY love this woman that much? 

How do I deal with this? I truly do NOT want a Divorce. She said she doesn't know if she wants one or not but she knows at this time she doesn't want "this" meaning "us" 

What do I do? I'd just assume die to be honest. I really don't want to live without my family. 

Good gawd this sucks. Back and forth, ... back and forth. Strong, weak..strong > weak. Why can't I keep on track?


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## moxy (Apr 2, 2012)

What you're feeling is the pain of rejection and betrayal, the loss of what you'd believed in (not love). The desire to end that pain automatically reaches for what is supposed to be a balm, your life partner. Unfortunately, she's the one causing you the pain. It will take time for you to retrain your mind and heart to seek comfort elsewhere. When you're thinking clearly and beyond the survival instinct, your anger will kick in.


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## Dewayne76 (Sep 26, 2012)

I'm trying to keep from turning angry. Supposedly that was one of the issues, but it hardly comes up when we talked, so I don't think that was even much of an issue. 

I know what you're saying Moxy. My anger has already tried to come into play several times. I even called her names and such, but I think it was so I could try to get over her. 

I had even been trying hypnotherapy which a friend's uncle does and it's not helping. I didn't want to admit that but I'm willing to try anything almost to get rid of the pain. BUt I still can't shake the "wanting my wife and family" bit. 

I'm such a wreck. This sucks.


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## Dewayne76 (Sep 26, 2012)

She talks to me like we're still together sometimes. Says "I love you" every time we leave each others sight. Still wants to watch movies with me, holds my hand at times... SHE reaches first. She's stopped contact with anyone else basically. She just says "I don't want this" or sometimes "I don't want this, not right now" Then this morning she says "not now doesn't = forever" And even mentions a chance... 

WTF am I suppose to do? Leave anyways? I love my wife. Still. I love my family. She even tells people she's got a wonderful husband, brags about her family to people at work etc. 

The MIDLIFE CRISIS for DUMMIES fits her to a T. Or at least each one down until the "Advanced" section. 

I need more advice please. I've tried to man up and walk away, but I break every time. She told me she wants me to be as strong as I use to be, a good man, stronger than her. WTH does that mean? lol. The woman is being nuts. But, I can't get away... can't make myself be ok.


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