# Confused



## Faith2011 (Apr 13, 2011)

My husband has filed for divorce and I have been going along with it (legally) despite the fact that I do not want to break up. The papers were filed 9 months ago but we have yet to go to pretrial. All winter long, he went back and forth between canceling it or proceeding. It was a roller coaster. All the while, we lived in the same house and slept in the same bed. About a month ago, he started sleeping at a friends. He would still come home to shower and eat, however. I know that he was coming over to check in, despite the fact that he would never admit that.

When I leave him alone, he comes closer. When I cut off communication, he becomes interested. But when he comes back home to sleep, we get into the old routine and he gets comfortable. And that leads him to have an "upset." He blames me for everything in the marriage and tells me all the reasons he wants out. I know he is saying these things in anger but they still hurt. I guess I am out of options but to just sit back and let him work through this.

Any words of wisdom out there?


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## anx (Nov 30, 2010)

Read "love must be tough". 

I don't really understand what is going on with your husband right now. 

If he wants to hold onto an angry caloused heart and put the blame 100% on you, theres not much you can do besides tell him to chose to fix this or continue on in this pattern of blame, anger, etc.

He needs to know that if he doesn't help and take the blame, something good he has will die. Is being "right" worth losing his wife?


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