# sh*t test or ???



## JackOfAllTrades (Jun 7, 2012)

Still fairly new here, but I'm wondering if any of you can help me figure out which of these behaviors that my wife does is a sh*t test: 
-txts from work to me at home "Can you mark these dates on the calendar for me?"
-tries weakly to open jar/lid/etc and then asks me to. This is stuff my 5 year old can open. 

What if it's something she CAN do, but I genuinely do much better, like BBQ, make fancy drinks with the espresso machine? There's no way I'm letting her near my BBQ, even if she votes steak and I'd rather have pasta! LOL.
Thanks guys.


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## thunderstruck (May 9, 2012)

I don't see those as shyte tests. The calendar thing is just asking a favor since you're at home. The jar...I don't know WTH that is...damsel in distress? And, if you can do something a lot better, by all means, keep doing it.

A shyte test might be more like...she's closer to the calendar in the house, but spread out on the sofa watching TV. She then calls you from the other side of the house, stopping some actual work you're doing, to walk over and mark it.


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## SunnyT (Jun 22, 2011)

Everything isn't a sh*t test.


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## JackOfAllTrades (Jun 7, 2012)

Thanks guys, I wasn't sure about the calendar.. I've been one of those guys failing these (and not knowing anything like them even existed) for years, so I'm looking for them everywhere now. Argh. I guess the part I missed about the calendar is that is actually easier for me to do since I'm here. Oops.


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## Drover (Jun 11, 2012)

My wife used to ask me to open jars for her, not as a test, but because she thought it made me feel manly to do for her.


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

You guys should be concentrating on filling each others love banks, not on testing and failing and worrying about stuff like this. Seriously. What a way to live.

The Love Bank

REAL Marriage


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## JackOfAllTrades (Jun 7, 2012)

Unhappy2011 said:


> Maybe you have a history of forgetting dates that she thinks she told you about and it bugs her so this is her passive way of getting you to remember?


Sorry, I should have been more clear: these are only relevant to her. They aren't family or even couple events.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

sh*t teast is like you just got up and got something to drink and she seen you and heard you in the kitchen but when you came back and after sitting down she says ahhh could you get me something to drink.

now in that case you say sure but you should have asked while I was in there .

and then every time you go get a drink you ask her if she would like one.

now if she say theres to much ice in this could you fix it ....then you dump it on her head and get tell her get the f out you crazy bit*h


just joking I'm in a sarcastic mood tonight. some would say everynight.

my example is not the best but you get the meaning hopefully


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## JackOfAllTrades (Jun 7, 2012)

Haha, funny stuff. Thanks for the help. I'll stop looking so hard for tests.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

JackOfAllTrades said:


> Sorry, I should have been more clear: these are only relevant to her. They aren't family or even couple events.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I'd view it as she wants them on the calendar, you are home to do it, and she wants to be sure that nothing gets scheduled at that time/date that would conflict. My parents do this all the time, to be sure their appointments are not at the same time.


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## cherokee96red (Apr 23, 2011)

Purposely arranging a situation to put your spouse in so that their faithfulness can be tested. That's a sheyat test!


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

cherokee96red said:


> Purposely arranging a situation to put your spouse in so that their faithfulness can be tested. That's a sheyat test!


said perfectly!


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## Gaia (Apr 27, 2012)

Wow... ok so.. asking your SO to get you something after they have gotten themselves something is a "test" And here i thought it was asking a simple favor. My SO has asked me to get him something after i have gotten myself something all the time.. and vice versa.. testing never once crossed our mind. It was more of a.. oh hey that looks good ... maybe i'll give it a shot.. or.. oh hey i just remembered i need this or that. I for one have NO problem getting my SO anything he has asked for. And hell opening the jar or soda or something? I ask my man to do this all the time recently because I no longer have the strength to do so if it's too tight. It's not a test at all.. not when i ask him anyway.. since when did asking favors or asking for genuine help become ... "tests" This I don't understand... hell I've never even heard of the term shyt test before...


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## Tall Average Guy (Jul 26, 2011)

Gaia said:


> Wow... ok so.. asking your SO to get you something after they have gotten themselves something is a "test" And here i thought it was asking a simple favor. My SO has asked me to get him something after i have gotten myself something all the time.. and vice versa.. testing never once crossed our mind. It was more of a.. oh hey that looks good ... maybe i'll give it a shot.. or.. oh hey i just remembered i need this or that. I for one have NO problem getting my SO anything he has asked for.


I would not call it a test if I am up and my wife asks me for something. It is a bit of test if she sees that I am, then asks me only after I sit down, or if she asks me to get something (like a drink) that she can just as easily get herself. For a real life example, we were sitting on the couch, both reading. My wife asked me to get up, go downstairs and get her a bottle of wine so she could have a glass. I don't drink wine, and she could do it just as easily as I can. I told her to check with the butler. She laughed and went to get it herself. I will say that as I quit doing "servant" type things for her, our relationship has improved.



> And hell opening the jar or soda or something? I ask my man to do this all the time recently because I no longer have the strength to do so if it's too tight. It's not a test at all.. not when i ask him anyway.. since when did asking favors or asking for genuine help become ... "tests" This I don't understand... hell I've never even heard of the term shyt test before...


I don't see this as a test either, especially when it is something he can do better. In another real life example, my wife, while in the kitchen, routinely asks me to get things from the top shelves. She probably could, but it takes a step stool and can be difficult for her. I do it (as my name would attest) because it is much easier for me. Not a test, but a recognition that we all have our strengths.


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## DTO (Dec 18, 2011)

JackOfAllTrades said:


> Thanks guys, I wasn't sure about the calendar.. I've been one of those guys failing these (and not knowing anything like them even existed) for years, so I'm looking for them everywhere now. Argh. I guess the part I missed about the calendar is that is actually easier for me to do since I'm here. Oops.


My take on the sh!t test is to just do what you feel is right for you in that situation. Her motivation should not matter. You won't get resentful doing stuff or running around and you'll be consistent. Problem solved.


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