# Lost desires



## quantum (Jul 27, 2009)

I am over 50, married for 20 years and have zero desire having intercourse with my husband who is 10 years younger. Had cancer surgery w/chemo & radiation treatment several years ago and still take hormone pills for the treatment. Due to high blood pressure I have to take pills for that too. Both of those medications keep libido down. I love my husband and don't want to loose him but still have zero desire. He is reading magazines and watches videos to please himself. Have discussed my problem with several doctors but obviously nothing (like hormone therapie) can be done since my cancer was hormone related. It is frustrating and upsetting to me to see my husband suffer. Both of us went to a sex counselor several years ago prior to my cancer treatment and this didn't help eather. I would like to feel what other woman feel when having intercourse. Please help!


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## GPR (Jan 3, 2009)

Well, this goes well beyond women not having sex because they are too tired...

If you can, what does it feel like when you have sex?

I'm asking because I will get enjoyment out of doing things for my wife that give me no direct stimulation. The act of me making HER feel good is all I need to enjoy what I'm doing and be happy and enthusiastic about it. I can be nothing to do with me getting stimulated directly.


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## quantum (Jul 27, 2009)

I am not to tired, this is not my problem. My problem is that I have zero interest. If I have sex with my husband I feel nothing.


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## GPR (Jan 3, 2009)

First thing I would suggest is to talk to your doctor about it. There are probably things you can take to help this out. It's not like you are the first person that would have this problem.


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

I would try a new Doctor, your current one is not listening to you. Your medications can be altered in strength etc. you just need to find the right combination.


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