# Kind of embarrassing to ask...



## greeneyeddolphin (May 31, 2010)

I've always been a...vanilla kinda girl when it comes to sex. I mean, I've done oral and I've used lots of positions, but never really explored sex. My boyfriend is a pretty kinky guy. The other night, we did anal for the first time for me. He wants me to be more open sexually, and so do I. I want to do things with him that I've never wanted to do with someone else. And I have some ideas, like tying up and the anal, but I know there are so many other things that I've never even thought of. I'd like to find out what some of those things are. But I want to surprise him with it, not just ask him for ideas. 

I know, of course, if I just google it, I'll just get a bunch of porn sites. Which, in a sense, *could* be helpful, but I don't think they'll be all that helpful. 

So...I was hoping some of you sexually open people could make some suggestions, either of things we could try or of sites I could use to get ideas. I really want more than just a change in position or something like that. 

The only things that we agree are off limits are other people, and anything involving feces or urine, or bleeding. 

Any suggestions for me? :scratchhead:


----------



## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

Here is one very educating website for learning all the various sex positions (in Sim's style)- and it is not a porn site. If you click on any of these postions down this long list, it will even show the motion ! 

All Sex Positions


----------



## CH (May 18, 2010)

LOL, some of those sex positions felt like playing twister and some made me and the wife scratch our heads on how we were gonna get into that position.

As for fantasies, for my wife it's to be able to use one of our sex toys on me. I've told her if she can get me drunk enough to pass out then she can do whatever she wants. Luckily she passes out only after 3 or 4 beers, so I won't have to worry about that. If your BF is into it, you could probably get a strap on for you to use on him.

My fantasies, me and a dildo doing DP on the wife. Not gonna happen for me though cuz the wife won't do anal. We've tried she just doesn't like it.

Before the kids, we also liked where I would carry her in front of me with me inside of her. Walk around the house and just go at it for a while wherever. Pick her up again and off we go to the races again. I was always inside of her the entire time. But this was when I could go like 2 or 3 times and still stay hard though. To be young again :rofl:


----------



## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

cheatinghubby, google use of Cialis; I've had a male friend tell me it keeps him hard (like a piece of wood) for 2 days, and she loves it too! Trying this is on my to-do list.


----------



## BigBadWolf (Nov 30, 2009)

Keep an open mind, that is the best thing for starters.

Consider when you and he discuss fantasies, to plan in your mind how to make this happen for each other. In this, a suprise sure, but you already have an idea what each other are wanting to experience.

Also look into ways to be physical and intimate without directly going right to sex. 

Such as just getting naked more often together and sharing a memory or telling a story, can turn into something that makes intimacy more about just sex. 

Also full body massages, or maybe just on impules begining to do something nice for him such as oral, without expecting anything in return or it to lead to intercourse, just as if a routine, in the same way, make the time you spend together not just about completing a sex act, so to speak.

Simply, sometimes to break routine or not have certain expectations provide opportunities for the new ideas and experiences to happen!


----------



## ThinkTooMuch (Aug 6, 2010)

ATG,

I'm glad you asked a question I can answer ;-), I am enriched by your thoughtful responses to folks here on many topics. 

I remember all too well when my GF, later my wife, and I were not the people you wanted living next door, or in a nearby hotel room, though we usually stopped before eleven PM. Personally I love long lunches with wine, knowing glances, and hurried returns to our bed at home or the hotel.

Have you ever woken him by taking his morning erection in mouth or hand? I assure you it is a very nice way to start the day, going from dreaming to wakefulness, erotic dream to erotic reality.

If you find a large walk in shower with lots and lots of hot water, a hotel is a good choice, and clean each other thoroughly using a mild soap, with a nice lubricant available, the possibilities are endless for someone like you who wants to bring her lover as much pleasure as possible. Thirty minutes, an hour can go by so quickly.

The brain is one's largest sex organ, as others have accurately written, imagination and being open to new experiences is key.

You might ask him to tell you what he wants to do, letting him know that you might say no, but won't reject him, you are rejecting an activity. I know telling what I want, sharing innermost thoughts and continuing to be loved even if my partner doesn't want to do something, is a wonderful feeling. 

If you are both energetic after you're nice and clean I suggest oral stimulation of every square inch of your bodies, sex when you or he are bent over, tongues, fingers, vibrators, breasts & nipples (yours and possibly his, many men don't realize just how sensitive they are until a partner tries).

He might like if you massage his prostate, it can be very, very intense though the first few times it can be, shall I say, a bit offputting. Use lots of lube, go very slow and well before you try it, read a lot and prepare.

Light caresses of his sack, perineum, anal area, sucking his fingers and vice versa, tell him what you will do to him, use your silk panties or lingerie or that nice lube to masturbate him, stopping just short of his orgasm time and time again. Masturbate yourself and make him watch - don't let him touch himself, or mutual masturbation.

Another time, tell him you are in control and give him explicit directions to bring you over the edge, this is a lot of fun for the right guy or vice-versa.

Writing this I remember how much I enjoyed driving my partner into paroxysms of pleasure, her screams a wonderful reward. Happy memories.

I'd ask my big sister for suggestions, her husband is always smiling, as were her boyfriends when we were in HS - we are both in our 60s. I seem to remember she bought a copy of the Kama Sutra in a Greenwich Village bookstore, I know she has some interesting picture books on her shelves. 

There is shopping for toys together on the web, or erotica in book stores. That big online store based in Seattle has interesting items all over, but if you have children, adult family or friends who use your computer, you will want clear your browser's cache as well as the history you leave in their on-line store. If my grandchildren were around I really wouldn't want them asking "Grandpa - what is that?" 

I'll stop here, hope this has been helpful.


----------



## ThinkTooMuch (Aug 6, 2010)

Sara Ann,

I hope your friend doesn't stay hard for 2 days, this can be very dangerous. Please have him stop taking it until he checks with his doctor, his abilities to enjoy intercourse may be compromised by erections that last 4 hours.

Is it possible he meant that he takes a Cialis tablet and for the next two days he *gets* very hard when excited? This is the maker's claim and is not dangerous, though one does get pretty tender under the right circumstances.



Sara Ann said:


> cheatinghubby, google use of Cialis; I've had a male friend tell me it keeps him hard (like a piece of wood) for 2 days, and she loves it too! Trying this is on my to-do list.


----------



## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

ThinkTooMuch, maybe he meant the Cialis gets him going again, but he did say he stays hard for hours, and she likes it, and sometimes she takes 1/2 of a tablet and likes that too.

I love all your ideas!

My husband is always tired, so he does not like me to wake him. What if I reach for a "morning erection" and there is none because he is sleeping, so then he just gets mad at me for waking him? Do guys have a morning erection every day? Does it start in your sleep, or right as you are waking up? Is it compromised by lack of sleep?


----------



## CH (May 18, 2010)

Sara Ann said:


> Do guys have a morning erection every day? Does it start in your sleep, or right as you are waking up? Is it compromised by lack of sleep?


I have one almost every day and almost all through the night. The minute I'm laying next to my wife, it's up and going. Wife hates sex at night so I usually have to wait till morning. When I'm asleep pretty sure it goes down but the second I'm up in the morning it's up again and I just hope it's one of those lucky days.

At least if I don't get any, lately my wife has been giving me HJs in the morning when we take a shower together.


----------

