# Low drive men, more help understanding please, pretty please with sugar on top...



## toolate (Sep 22, 2009)

Ok, so husband finally has been having sex again, but now its the work week he is like a 70 year old man! I pressed up against him during the snooze on the alarm time (we get 10 minutes, of part awake time in bed). He liked it, but when I turned over, he didnt reciprocate. Im naked, except for lacy tanga. So im like, what the heck? 

He used to take advantage of this snooze time for us time, but not in a long time. How do I get him to take advantage again? Should I wear flannel pj's to get him hot for me bc the tanga didnt work?


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## Kobo (May 13, 2010)

Did you pull him towards you?


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## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

For me, 10 minutes is not near enough to 1) wake out of my groggy state and 2) really enjoy making love, perhaps he just knows he will be unsatisfied if he starts into you and doesn't want to disappoint either you or himself?

Personally, when the alarm goes off (snooze even) it means time to wake up, get out of bed and get going. But I'm not a morning person, however on the weekend or days I don't have to be somewhere at the regular time I love to wake up at the usual time and spend an hour or two making love.


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## annagarret (Jun 12, 2011)

tomorrow morning wake him up by sucking on his c***


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## toolate (Sep 22, 2009)

Thanks for the suggestions. My bad, my problem is I never had to seduce men ever in my life, I dont know how. Even with my husband it used to be enough just to press my breasts into his back, turn over and have his 2nd fave part of me facing him... all he has to do is touch me on the backside and he is ready to go. 

Im reading these suggestions like wow. 

Another problem is I will get upset if he says no again to any advance... Im beyond hurting when he says no... I have moved to anger when he says no. Then now I turn it into an aggressive sex situation I dont like (at first)... bc instead of walking away anymore, Im like, you diva, stop *****ing and start licking me! He whines some more and I tell him to stop whining and f--- me. This is not how I want our sex to be now that we are finally having it again. I want the romance that we have lacked for 2 and a half years. I want him to seduce me like he used to.

Since that is not in the suggestions given, Im understanding that I must take the reigns and go turn him on somehow. Im not to the point where I could wake him up with a bj bc I fear he would throw me out of bed for waking him up at all. 

What do I do if we are watching tv on the couch and he is "playing" (I call it f---ing with me, and hate it) and then I say "you are probably going to want to take me upstairs next to f--- me" and his answer is "no, actually I just want o cuddle and go to sleep." I said too bad and got up and walked away. After arguing with me for 30 minute he said "Ill have sex with you, you want to have sex?" By then I was pissed off i said "you just dont get it... you think Im going to be in the mood after you mock me all evening... why do you do everything that pisses me off, piss me off, and then say Ill have sex?" He said "I dont know, I didnt think I was doing that, I was playing." I said, the kind of playing you are doing is like 5 year olds... not adults flirting with each other.

So, I have no sex for the next 10 days so i dont get pg.... and the stand in penis he bought me (to take him off the hook) IS BROKEN....yeah. 

We are on very different cycles and planets. Hes home from work right now and I cant even touch him! you know what, f--- his rules... Im going to go try to have sex with him....


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## toolate (Sep 22, 2009)

*Dean* said:


> OK let me try again. From the information it sounds like his Sex drive has dropped.
> 
> Many things can cause it. Stress at work, worrying about finances/bills, changing job duties, an upcoming layoff, long work hours, change in work hours, having a very successful career, a new promotion, climbing the corp. ladder, his health, weight change, etc.
> 
> ...


Ok, I get what you are saying now. I thought before you were saying the 10 minutes wasnt enough... and when its snooze time thats all we have, so I was confused. I think I hear you saying now that it may take more time to NOTICE me, to GET AROUSED, to RESPOND to me and that his initiating may go away completely from the low sex drive.

He exercises regularly, is in great shape. 

You are right that my confidence did go down, and I do also have resentment... which I have to work very diligently to keep quiet when he just goes about his business not noticing me seducing him or not even considering the fact that he promised to do certain romantic things and "forgets."

But, I just swallowed my fear and as I declared in my last post, went to f--- him. Well, first I disrobed down to bra and panties. Then, I put my wrap sweater on... it doesnt fasten in the front at all, so open just enough. I went to his home office and just started talking to him. He actually started things going from there... and it was alot of fun for both of us.

Im must be such a simple yet complex person to be so giddy over a successful sex encounter with my husband... but I am nonetheless psyched!

:smthumbup::smthumbup::smthumbup:

Im going to continue reading through your suggestions and other posts about seducing bc I thought I would suck at it... but I really didnt have to do that much after swallowing my fear.


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## CH (May 18, 2010)

annagarret said:


> tomorrow morning wake him up by sucking on his c***


LOL, once my wife did this, but it was in the middle of the night. We had been watching a horror movies (old school japanese, you know the girl with long hair and such).

I woke up and started screaming, only it was more of a raspy scream because I was scared ****less thinking it was a ghost.

She's done that to me twice in the past, once giving a BJ and the other time she was riding me cowboy style. I swear I thought I was gonna have a heart attack waking up with blurry vision and seeing nothing but a dark shape with long hair on top of me.


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## toolate (Sep 22, 2009)

cheatinghubby said:


> LOL, once my wife did this, but it was in the middle of the night. We had been watching a horror movies (old school japanese, you know the girl with long hair and such).
> 
> I woke up and started screaming, only it was more of a raspy scream because I was scared ****less thinking it was a ghost.
> 
> She's done that to me twice in the past, once giving a BJ and the other time she was riding me cowboy style. I swear I thought I was gonna have a heart attack waking up with blurry vision and seeing nothing but a dark shape with long hair on top of me.


:rofl::rofl: The image is quite scary when you type it out that way... half asleep she may look like cousin It from behind no face, all hair... get it?


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## sandc (Dec 15, 2011)

Wow. I'm new here but what I wouldn't give for my wife to do that! My drive hasn't dipped yet. I think she's hoping it will. Sometimes persistence is the key. Keep at and give him time to realize what is happening.


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## toolate (Sep 22, 2009)

sandc said:


> Wow. I'm new here but what I wouldn't give for my wife to do that! My drive hasn't dipped yet. I think she's hoping it will. Sometimes persistence is the key. Keep at and give him time to realize what is happening.


Which one? Ride you cowgirl or come to chat with you in panties and bra and open sweater?

My answer if I were a guy: "yes please!!!!"


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## sandc (Dec 15, 2011)

toolate said:


> Which one? Ride you cowgirl or come to chat with you in panties and bra and open sweater?
> 
> My answer if I were a guy: "yes please!!!!"


Um... let's see... either one! But my wife would have to be prepared to immediately be relieved of the panties, bra, and sweater. :smthumbup:


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