# Top 10 lies women tell men



## Faithful Wife

Or however many you want to list!

No, I wasn't looking at that dude.

No, your belly protruding over your belt doesn't affect my sex drive.

No, I absolutely never, ever think of any of my exes when we are having sex.


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## karole

Size really doesn't matter.


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## personofinterest

I'm "curvy." lol

Yes, I know how to cook.

Sure, you can go out with the boys every Tuesday....and Thursday....I don't mind at all

"I want you to be honest" (usually followed by a trick fat question.


Okay, I am kind of being funny...KIND of


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## Faithful Wife

I never look at porn. Isn’t that just something men do? 

(Pulls up BBC 1 through 20 the minute he walks out the door).


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## happydad

My eyes are blue, my lips are red, my cheeks are flush, my skin is tan, I'm this tall, my breasts sit this high, my hair is this color


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## Elizabeth001

Yes...I got mine. You were awesome babe...


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## farsidejunky

"I'm fine."

ETA: sorry, just realized this is in the ladies lounge as it wasn't easily evident through Tapatalk.

Sent from my Pixel 3 XL using Tapatalk


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## MaiChi

karole said:


> Size really doesn't matter.


But this is an interesting statement for many women. I cannot say whether or not size matters as I have only ever know his size. I measured it when he kept asking me if it was the right size. I told him it did not matter at all, which it does not. I am very happy with it. But he thinks a little more would be better. I do not.


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## MaiChi

Faithful Wife said:


> Or however many you want to list!
> 
> No, I wasn't looking at that dude.
> 
> No, your belly protruding over your belt doesn't affect my sex drive.
> 
> No, I absolutely never, ever think of any of my exes when we are having sex.


How many have we counted so far? 

Men also think women tell lies about headaches.


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## Lila

farsidejunky said:


> "I'm fine."
> 
> ETA: sorry, just realized this is in the ladies lounge as it wasn't easily evident through Tapatalk.
> 
> Sent from my Pixel 3 XL using Tapatalk


That's the one I was going to post lol


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## ConanHub

I hate "I'm fine...". Grrrrrrrr!


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## SecondWind

You're a good lover.

I don't mind (fill in the blank.)

I only think of you when we have sex.


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## Faithful Wife

"I'm fine" is a universal lie, non gender specific.

Maybe we should make a non gender specific list also? ha ha! nah


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## Lila

I'm just going to leave this one here...........

"You're the best I've ever had"


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## Faithful Wife

Lila said:


> I'm just going to leave this one here...........
> 
> "You're the best I've ever had"


A lot of these, I have actually ONLY said if it was true!!

(or have I?) >


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## ConanHub

Just another penis thread........🙄


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## Elizabeth001

ConanHub said:


> Just another penis thread........




Then go take a leak......


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## Faithful Wife

ConanHub said:


> Just another penis thread........&#55357;&#56900;


What, no it isn't. It isn't about that at all. We don't even notice those things, we've only seen yours and one other on TV once that we most definitely turned our heads away from, and we really have no thoughts about them whatsoever (not even yours), so why would a woman be making a whole thread just to talk about penises?


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## Elizabeth001

Faithful Wife said:


> What, no it isn't. It isn't about that at all. We don't even notice those things, we've only seen yours and one other on TV once that we most definitely turned our heads away from, and we really have no thoughts about them whatsoever (not even yours), so why would a woman be making a whole thread just to talk about penises?




Because it’s our favorite subject!
  


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## ConanHub

Faithful Wife said:


> What, no it isn't. It isn't about that at all. We don't even notice those things, we've only seen yours and one other on TV once that we most definitely turned our heads away from, and we really have no thoughts about them whatsoever (not even yours), so why would a woman be making a whole thread just to talk about penises?


You've done it again. I'm laughing my ass off!:laugh:


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## Lila

Faithful Wife said:


> ConanHub said:
> 
> 
> 
> Just another penis thread........��
> 
> 
> 
> What, no it isn't. It isn't about that at all. We don't even notice those things, we've only seen yours and one other on TV once that we most definitely turned our heads away from, and we really have no thoughts about them whatsoever (not even yours), so why would a woman be making a whole thread just to talk about penises?
Click to expand...

You're too funny @Faithful Wife. It would have taken me a week to come up with that.


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## Lila

"I love hanging out with your [insert family member]"


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## Faithful Wife

Elizabeth001 said:


> Because it’s our favorite subject!


Wrong thread, where is the truth thread? :laugh:


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## Andy1001

I’ll be ready in five minutes.


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## CharlieParker

Do what you want. (Aka f you.)


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## Faithful Wife

No, I didn't spend any money, I used a coupon and then my buyers rewards and everything was half off and buy one get one free and also I had some things to return, so in the end the cashier actually gave ME money back!


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## Andy1001

“Enjoy yourself”.


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## notmyjamie

Elizabeth001 said:


> Yes...I got mine. You were awesome babe...


This is one lie I have never and will never tell. That's just working against my own interests.





CharlieParker said:


> Do what you want. (Aka f you.)


This is not a lie...it's a test. And if you go do what you want, you've failed.




Andy1001 said:


> “Enjoy yourself”.


Same as above.

>


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## Satisfied Mind

"Don't worry about it."

"It's exactly what I would have gotten for myself."

"I mean he's cute, but it's not like I fantasize about him or anything."


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## notmyjamie

"This? I've had this forever!!" <---my friend does this one all the time to her husband.


"yes I'm on the pill, don't worry about it baby" <---- not me, but I've known a few who told that lie. (I found out after the fact)


"Don't worry, it's not THAT expensive" <--ok, this one I've done. But only about dance for my girls, not for stuff for me.


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## Faithful Wife

No it doesn’t look like it’s getting thinner. Not even in the back.


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## ConanHub

It's ok. We broke up. 

I'm not seeing anyone......

(Waking up in the morning after screwing the little blond sex pot all night and having her ask to run away with me. I groggily look into the eyes of an angry boyfriend. I realize my hand is on the cute little rump of a NOT SINGLE woman and it devovled from there...)

Obviously from my single days. 

Having a hard time thinking of fibs Mrs. C uses.

P S. I realize men do the same thing.


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## Faithful Wife

ConanHub said:


> Having a hard time thinking of fibs Mrs. C uses.


What about the vibe batteries? I bet she lies about that. >


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## ConanHub

Faithful Wife said:


> What about the vibe batteries? I bet she lies about that. >


Sooooo baaadddd....>

I actually wished she liked toys. She don't....


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## Faithful Wife

ConanHub said:


> I actually wished she liked toys. She don't....


No, I don't like toys, you're all I need.


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## notmyjamie

Faithful Wife said:


> No, I don't like toys, you're all I need.


OMG...he walked right into that one!!!! LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now I need my inhaler!!!! Damn.


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## ConanHub

notmyjamie said:


> OMG...he walked right into that one!!!! LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now I need my inhaler!!!! Damn.


She is also picking on me a little bit from a previous thread.:wink2:

I will say her setup was pretty damn good!


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## farsidejunky

Faithful Wife said:


> "I'm fine" is a universal lie, non gender specific.
> 
> 
> 
> Maybe we should make a non gender specific list also? ha ha! nah


It wouldn't be nearly as fun.

Sent from my Pixel 3 XL using Tapatalk


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## farsidejunky

Lila said:


> I'm just going to leave this one here...........
> 
> "You're the best I've ever had"


Wait...you mean y'all like about this?

I'm taking what's left of my ego to the house to play video games...

Sent from my Pixel 3 XL using Tapatalk


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## farsidejunky

Faithful Wife said:


> No, I don't like toys, you're all I need.


This, @ConanHub.

It's a mind ****, isn't it...

Lol

Sent from my Pixel 3 XL using Tapatalk


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## ConanHub

farsidejunky said:


> This, @ConanHub.
> 
> It's a mind ****, isn't it...
> 
> Lol
> 
> Sent from my Pixel 3 XL using Tapatalk


Nicely sharp wit.

I would have expounded but it would have spoiled the mood.

FW is a great jokester!:grin2:


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## AandM

Faithful Wife said:


> What, no it isn't. It isn't about that at all. We don't even notice those things, we've only seen yours and one other on TV once that we most definitely turned our heads away from, and we really have no thoughts about them whatsoever (not even yours), so why would a woman be making a whole thread just to talk about penises?


I don't know why you listed this in a "lies" list. My wife says almost the same to me all the time.


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## ConanHub

>>>>>


aandm said:


> i don't know why you listed this in a "lies" list. My wife says almost the same to me all the time.


>>>>>


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## manfromlamancha

In addition to the ones already mentioned:

I never lie ...

I never do this ...

I've never done (anything like) this before ...

I'm not drunk (I only had a single glass of wine) ...

I'm not going to puke ...

I'm usually not this crazy (or I'm usually not like this) ...

He's just a friend (or he is a happy family man or you have a dirty mind) ...

I didn't expect anything (from you) anyway ...

I promise I won't get angry ...

I'm not the jealous type ...

I've only had sex with (number) of men ...

My phone ran out of charge ...

I don't care about your ex, that was in the past ...

We just went to a quiet little wine bar to have a chat ...

I've never fooled around with him (or we were just good friends) ...

I won't tell anyone ...

This is not about me ...


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## Faithful Wife

AandM said:


> I don't know why you listed this in a "lies" list. My wife says almost the same to me all the time.


Some women really are telling the truth.

Men need to know their own woman. Many of these would not apply to some women, including some of the wives of TAM men.

So if your woman really is telling the truth on this one...what would she lie about? Maybe....

Ok yes I was really into it.

That kind of thing?


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## Faithful Wife

manfromlamancha said:


> In addition to the ones already mentioned:
> 
> I never lie ...
> 
> I never do this ...
> 
> I've never done (anything like) this before ...
> 
> I'm not drunk (I only had a single glass of wine) ...
> 
> I'm not going to puke ...
> 
> I'm usually not this crazy (or I'm usually not like this) ...
> 
> He's just a friend (or he is a happy family man or you have a dirty mind) ...
> 
> I didn't expect anything (from you) anyway ...
> 
> I promise I won't get angry ...
> 
> I'm not the jealous type ...
> 
> I've only had sex with (number) of men ...
> 
> My phone ran out of charge ...
> 
> I don't care about your ex, that was in the past ...
> 
> We just went to a quiet little wine bar to have a chat ...
> 
> I've never fooled around with him (or we were just good friends) ...
> 
> I won't tell anyone ...
> 
> This is not about me ...


Yikes. You win.


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## Faithful Wife

Here is an honesty check...just for fun, to balance against the zany fun answers.

I have never told a guy he was the best or biggest if he wasn’t. I would have had plenty of other glowing words and phrases for them so “the best” just doesn’t come up unless you bring it up. 

I am willing to be completely open and honest about solo time, but only if he is too. And only if we are both shame free and happy about it. Not if it is some kind of control or overview thing. But also, sometimes they don’t ask and you don’t either. In my case that happens when I feel really great about the person and I don’t see any reason to change anything or know about their solo habits (and they don’t ask either).

Therefore, I don’t ever lie about toys or solo time. I may not be forthcoming. It all depends on the relationship.

I actually do not ever put anything inanimate inside myself. Have done it more times than I can count, and not a single time did it feel good. A penis or a finger? Oh hell yeah!!! 

My sisters who love their dildos, more power to ya. I would have forty of them if I liked it. And yes, I have tried them all. Just to make sure.


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## AandM

Faithful Wife said:


> Some women really are telling the truth.
> 
> Men need to know their own woman. Many of these would not apply to some women, including some of the wives of TAM men.
> 
> So if your woman really is telling the truth on this one...what would she lie about? Maybe....
> 
> Ok yes I was really into it.
> 
> That kind of thing?


Yeah.

Or you don't know what this <<humor>> thing is.

I mean this in the nicest of ways.

Are you saying...

..
...
....

Mind blown...

**** limp.....



Lucy, you got some 'splaining to do!


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## Faithful Wife

AandM said:


> Yeah.
> 
> Or you don't know what this <<humor>> thing is.
> 
> I mean this in the nicest of ways.


No, I’m sorry, I don’t know your story. I do try to catch on to people’s humor but it takes me getting to know you a bit. Plus I’m a bit daft. 

So what’ll you have? I’m pouring, but whatever it is you are stuck drinking it from a giant beer stein bigger than your head. :toast:


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## AandM

Faithful Wife said:


> No, I’m sorry, I don’t know your story. I do try to catch on to people’s humor but it takes me getting to know you a bit. Plus I’m a bit daft.
> 
> So what’ll you have? I’m pouring, but whatever it is you are stuck drinking it from a giant beer stein bigger than your head. :toast:


See above. Whadda ya charge?


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## Faithful Wife

AandM said:


> See above. Whadda ya charge?


Your best lie to an internet rando woman (me). Go!


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## AandM

Faithful Wife said:


> No, I’m sorry, I don’t know your story. I do try to catch on to people’s humor but it takes me getting to know you a bit. Plus I’m a bit daft.
> 
> So what’ll you have? I’m pouring, but whatever it is you are stuck drinking it from a giant beer stein bigger than your head. :toast:


Admittedly, always kinda had the hots for Veronica.


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## AandM

Faithful Wife said:


> Your best lie to an internet rando woman (me). Go!


IT's prehensile. Also, IT can lick my eyebrows. <<IT has been disavowed from the clown union>>.


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## manfromlamancha

Faithful Wife said:


> Yikes. You win.


LOL - not trying to win anything though this would serve as a useful guide to younger husbands in interpreting (and accepting) what your wife is saying to you and then determining whether its important or not.

The hardest one I cope with is the "I'm fine" bit when it is often clear that she is anything but.

Toys - I say go for it - especially if I reap any benefits from it although it is not a precondition.

No of sexual partners (same as above).

Fancying other men - my wife is the ultimate flirt and is very human (like all of us). However while others warm up the engine I get to turn the key! As far as I know 

The other lies are unnecessary (for me) but if they give her any peace of mind, comfort etc then that's OK too.0


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## Faithful Wife

manfromlamancha said:


> LOL - not trying to win anything though this would serve as a useful guide to younger husbands in interpreting (and accepting) what your wife is saying to you and then determining whether its important or not.
> 
> The hardest one I cope with is the "I'm fine" bit when it is often clear that she is anything but.
> 
> Toys - I say go for it - especially if I reap any benefits from it although it is not a precondition.
> 
> No of sexual partners (same as above).
> 
> Fancying other men - my wife is the ultimate flirt and is very human (like all of us). However while others warm up the engine I get to turn the key! As far as I know
> 
> The other lies are unnecessary (for me) but if they give her any peace of mind, comfort etc then that's OK too.0


OK, I may have misinterpreted some of those from your list to be cheater script lies. Glad to read them anew!

About the I’m fine....yeah it’s like a brick wall.

Can you or anyone suggest what someone should say instead of I’m fine? Say for example, they definitely aren’t fine, but you’re walking out the door to some event with 15 kids in your van and you honestly don’t have time to get into it. Then the person should say.....talk later? Not fine but no time?

Every time I said I’m fine but didn’t mean it, I said it because I knew I could not get into the whole thing I’m not fine about for some reason.


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## AandM

Faithful Wife said:


> OK, I may have misinterpreted some of those from your list to be cheater script lies. Glad to read them anew!
> 
> About the I’m fine....yeah it’s like a brick wall.
> 
> Can you or anyone suggest what someone should say instead of I’m fine? Say for example, they definitely aren’t fine, but you’re walking out the door to some event with 15 kids in your van and you honestly don’t have time to get into it. Then the person should say.....talk later? Not fine but no time?
> 
> Every time I said I’m fine but didn’t mean it, I said it because I knew I could not get into the whole thing I’m not fine about for some reason.


How about, "Cool story, bro?"

Although, I'm sure my gravestone will read, "Don't worry. I'm fine."


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## BioFury

karole said:


> Size really doesn't matter.


Oh boy. Now I have to make a penis size thread :wink2:


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## Lila

farsidejunky said:


> Lila said:
> 
> 
> 
> I'm just going to leave this one here...........
> 
> "You're the best I've ever had"
> 
> 
> 
> Wait...you mean y'all lie about this?
> 
> I'm taking what's left of my ego to the house to play video games...
> 
> Sent from my Pixel 3 XL using Tapatalk
Click to expand...

That's just cruel threaten us with the video games!!!!! Pfft. You know how to hit below the belt. 😄


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## Lila

Faithful Wife said:


> Here is an honesty check...just for fun, to balance against the zany fun answers.
> 
> I have never told a guy he was the best or biggest if he wasn’t. I would have had plenty of other glowing words and phrases for them so “the best” just doesn’t come up unless you bring it up.
> 
> I am willing to be completely open and honest about solo time, but only if he is too. And only if we are both shame free and happy about it. Not if it is some kind of control or overview thing. But also, sometimes they don’t ask and you don’t either. In my case that happens when I feel really great about the person and I don’t see any reason to change anything or know about their solo habits (and they don’t ask either).
> 
> Therefore, I don’t ever lie about toys or solo time. I may not be forthcoming. It all depends on the relationship.
> 
> I actually do not ever put anything inanimate inside myself. Have done it more times than I can count, and not a single time did it feel good. A penis or a finger? Oh hell yeah!!!
> 
> My sisters who love their dildos, more power to ya. I would have forty of them if I liked it. And yes, I have tried them all. Just to make sure.


As the "lies" that have been posted here...

I have never told a guy he was the best or the biggest unless it was true. I also don't lie about it being good unless it was true but I don't go out of my way to say it sucked. I just refrain from saying anything unless asked and then I'm gentle but honest. 

As far as lying about orgasming, with the exception of my first boyfriend, I have not lied about it happening. I'm pretty vocal when it happens so it's not like I have to say anything to let them know when it happens. 

Toys and solo play..... I'm not big on masturbation but do own toys, mostly for my partners to use on me. I don't hide or lie about them but am picky about when I share that info and when they come out to play. If I had a partner go into my drawer and grab a toy to use on me without my express permission, I'd be soooo pissed. This is a new thing for me.

My common lie is the "fine" response when I'm far from it. It has more to do with my temper than anything else. I don't like fighting so when I get really angry it's best for me to cool down, think it through, then bring it up for discussion. Some may disagree and say fighting is good but if I let my angry thoughts loose right that moment, I would get loud and heads would roll.


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## Blondilocks

I love your family.


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## Andy1001

The worst lie ever.
In a coffee shop and I’m getting coffee for both of us and I ask her do you want cake/doughnut etc and she says no.
Then she eats half of mine!
Unforgivable.


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## StillSearching

When she says " i won't drive by your house to see who's there"


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## ConanHub

"I don't care where we eat."

That is definitely a Mrs. C special!


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## NobodySpecial

Yes you can find the man in the boat. I know I already shared in the other thread. But it remains relevant.


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## SadSamIAm

Faithful Wife said:


> I actually do not ever put anything inanimate inside myself. Have done it more times than I can count, and not a single time did it feel good.


One of these two things is a lie. LOL

You can't even count how many times you have tried!!!! 

How long till you give up?


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## Faithful Wife

SadSamIAm said:


> One of these two things is a lie. LOL
> 
> You can't even count how many times you have tried!!!!
> 
> How long till you give up?


Gave up years ago....haven't tried in at least 10 years.

I have allowed my lovers to have fun with me that way, if they wanted to do that. But they could see it obviously does nothing for me, so they usually give it up pretty quick.

Gimme some flesh or forget it! :smile2:

Obviously, saying "do not ever" wasn't quite correct...I meant I do not ever MB that way. And that part is literally true. And even when I did try, it was not MB'ing, it was just "hey do I even like this?" Answer was no.


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## AandM

NobodySpecial said:


> Yes you can find the man in the boat. I know I already shared in the other thread. But it remains relevant.


I gotta ask - Ray Stevenson fan?


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## Chuck71

notmyjamie said:


> This is not a lie...it's a test. And if you go do what *she wants*, you've failed.
> 
> 
> >


All fixed


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## just got it 55

ConanHub said:


> Sooooo baaadddd....>
> 
> I actually wished she liked toys. She don't....


That one must be on someones list.

55


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## TheDudeLebowski

"I never said that!" 

That probably goes for men and women.

"It's your baby"

The most gender specific lie told.


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## notmyjamie

Chuck71 said:


> All fixed



LOL!!!! True, very true!!!!! :smile2:


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## manfromlamancha

Andy1001 said:


> The worst lie ever.
> In a coffee shop and I’m getting coffee for both of us and I ask her do you want cake/doughnut etc and she says no.
> Then she eats half of mine!
> Unforgivable.


Ugh! This has happened to me so many times except that I sometimes get "you don't really need that, you are piling on the weight" just before she scoffs the whole damn thing!


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## SecondWind

Faithful Wife said:


> I actually do not ever put anything inanimate inside myself. Have done it more times than I can count, and not a single time did it feel good. A penis or a finger? Oh hell yeah!!!
> 
> My sisters who love their dildos, more power to ya. I would have forty of them if I liked it. And yes, I have tried them all. Just to make sure.


Same. I've considered getting something after reading here, but then I think they would be cold. I like the warmth of the human body, so I'll probably never get a toy.


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## NobodySpecial

AandM said:


> I gotta ask - Ray Stevenson fan?


Never heard of him. But I got "man in the boat" from my husband. It made me laugh so hard my belly hurt.


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## NobodySpecial

Faithful Wife said:


> Here is an honesty check...just for fun, to balance against the zany fun answers.
> 
> I have never told a guy he was the best or biggest if he wasn’t.


Me neither. It's a lose/lose proposition. Wait, I lie.  I have. And stopped. It is a losing proposition. If that is important to him, he will be on and on and on about it. Which is NOT the best. 



> I would have had plenty of other glowing words and phrases for them so “the best” just doesn’t come up unless you bring it up.
> 
> I am willing to be completely open and honest about solo time, but only if he is too. And only if we are both shame free and happy about it.


Slightly opposite here. I am MORE than happy to be open and honest about solo time. And if there is ANY problem with it, I want to know. See ya.



> Not if it is some kind of control or overview thing. But also, sometimes they don’t ask and you don’t either. In my case that happens when I feel really great about the person and I don’t see any reason to change anything or know about their solo habits (and they don’t ask either).


It would not occur to me to ask or care about their solo habits. Oh geez. even that is not true in the literal sense. AT one point I asked my DH if he was coming on the seat of the office chair. She was like - you think I am sitting on a pile of dried spockie day after day?? Yah ok that was dumb.



> Therefore, I don’t ever lie about toys or solo time. I may not be forthcoming. It all depends on the relationship.
> 
> I actually do not ever put anything inanimate inside myself. Have done it more times than I can count, and not a single time did it feel good. A penis or a finger? Oh hell yeah!!!


I don't love it either. Don't do it anymore. It's just not my thing. Hitachi? Hell yah.



> My sisters who love their dildos, more power to ya. I would have forty of them if I liked it. And yes, I have tried them all. Just to make sure.


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## NobodySpecial

SecondWind said:


> Same. I've considered getting something after reading here, but then I think they would be cold. I like the warmth of the human body, so I'll probably never get a toy.


The one I *did* use was a glass one. Straight from the fridge. That was a different thing. And nice.


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## NobodySpecial

TheDudeLebowski said:


> "I never said that!"


I have said this to my husband after he completely mutilated what I DID say.


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## arbitrator

*"I would never ever dream of cheating on or loving anyone but you!" - My RSXW

Famous last words!*


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## Mr.Married

I'll still blow you after marriage


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## Faithful Wife

NobodySpecial said:


> The one I *did* use was a glass one. Straight from the fridge. That was a different thing. And nice.


Tried it. Was definitely an interesting feeling. Still didn't cause any arousal or desire to continue.


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## AandM

NobodySpecial said:


> Never heard of him. But I got "man in the boat" from my husband. It made me laugh so hard my belly hurt.


"Rome". HBO series in the early 2000's. He played Titus Pullo, and was trying to explain how to please the wife to his centurion officer Lucius Vorenus. Amusing scene.


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## notmyjamie

Mr.Married said:


> I'll still blow you after marriage



I just don't understand this...if it's on the table before, why take it off just because you're married? Taking that out of rotation makes for a more boring sex life in my opinion. But I know many women do take it out. Had a neighbor ask me once if I did it as he looked over at his wife with a look on his face that told me she doesn't. Then he looked back at me and said "nevermind, I can tell you do" and let out a huge sigh. Poor guy!!!!

I'm still not sure if he was complimenting me or calling a *****. LOL


----------



## Faithful Wife

notmyjamie said:


> Mr.Married said:
> 
> 
> 
> I'll still blow you after marriage
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I just don't understand this...if it's on the table before, why take it off just because you're married? Taking that out of rotation makes for a more boring sex life in my opinion. But I know many women do take it out. Had a neighbor ask me once if I did it as he looked over at his wife with a look on his face that told me she doesn't. Then he looked back at me and said "nevermind, I can tell you do" and let out a huge sigh. Poor guy!!!!
> 
> I'm still not sure if he was complimenting me or calling a *****. LOL
Click to expand...

Yikes! Seems kind of mean to his wife, even if she doesn’t give bjs. To humiliate her in front of another woman especially and in that way. But I’m not saying he shouldn’t have done it not knowing their story and all but...wow I think I would rather he just asked me for a divorce in front of you if it was me.

But I also can’t relate to taking things off the table. At the same time I can’t relate to demanding each and every thing someone got before. All sides of that confuse me.

It may be a thing only LD people do. 

Is there anyone here who would cop to bjs before marriage but not after? Of course if he stopped going down too that would be different. But I don’t recall any TAM women saying they dropped bjs off. I don’t know why they would. I can understand never liking them and never doing them. But do then don’t, a mystery to me.


----------



## notmyjamie

Faithful Wife said:


> Yikes! Seems kind of mean to his wife, even if she doesn’t give bjs. To humiliate her in front of another woman especially and in that way. But I’m not saying he shouldn’t have done it not knowing their story and all but...wow I think I would rather he just asked me for a divorce in front of you if it was me.
> 
> But I also can’t relate to taking things off the table. At the same time I can’t relate to demanding each and every thing someone got before. All sides of that confuse me.
> 
> It may be a thing only LD people do.
> 
> Is there anyone here who would cop to bjs before marriage but not after? Of course if he stopped going down too that would be different. But I don’t recall any TAM women saying they dropped bjs off. I don’t know why they would. I can understand never liking them and never doing them. But do then don’t, a mystery to me.


Yeah, I was surprised because this guy is usually pretty private about his relationship. I'm guessing they must have just gotten into a fight about it or something and his usual reserve slipped. 

I work with a lot of women who have never given or gotten oral sex. To them it's unthinkable. But, they never did it...it's not something they took off the table after marriage. To stop after marriage is just a big ole' bait and switch. I'd be pissed if my husband said "I do" then said "I won't anymore".


----------



## ConanHub

Oral is like half our sex life! I can't imagine not having it.


----------



## TheDudeLebowski

notmyjamie said:


> Yeah, I was surprised because this guy is usually pretty private about his relationship. I'm guessing they must have just gotten into a fight about it or something and his usual reserve slipped.
> 
> I work with a lot of women who have never given or gotten oral sex. To them it's unthinkable. But, they never did it...it's not something they took off the table after marriage. To stop after marriage is just a big ole' bait and switch. I'd be pissed if my husband said "I do" then said "I won't anymore".


Why are you friends with people like that? If you dont give oral, I'm not certain you should ever find happiness in your life.


----------



## notmyjamie

TheDudeLebowski said:


> Why are you friends with people like that? If you dont give oral, I'm not certain you should ever find happiness in your life.


LOL!! I didn't say I was friends with any of them. The first guy is a neighbor, not a friend, which makes his extremely personal question even more weird. The women I mentioned are coworkers. One of whom was recently asked by a patient if oral sex is still ok because PIV was a danger to the pregnancy. She was so disgusted by the question that she walked out of the room in absolute horror and when someone mentioned it was a legit question she said "Well THAT just doesn't happen at <insert her address here> to which I replied "then I feel sorry for you!!!" She has never looked at me the same again. She was SHOCKED. :laugh:


----------



## TheDudeLebowski

notmyjamie said:


> LOL!! I didn't say I was friends with any of them. The first guy is a neighbor, not a friend, which makes his extremely personal question even more weird. The women I mentioned are coworkers. One of whom was recently asked by a patient if oral sex is still ok because PIV was a danger to the pregnancy. She was so disgusted by the question that she walked out of the room in absolute horror and when someone mentioned it was a legit question she said "Well THAT just doesn't happen at <insert her address here> to which I replied "then I feel sorry for you!!!" She has never looked at me the same again. She was SHOCKED. :laugh:


So a neighbor who is obviously not happy, and a few coworkers who are also probably not happy. 

The entire idea is I'm going to do whatever to bring pleasure to my partner. Not only that, I want you so bad I want to taste every part of you. I want more than a sense of touch and sight, I want to taste you, and smell you, I want all of it! God I want you so bad, I would drink your .... Sorry.... Getting carried away. But THAT is what oral sex is really. Desire beyond sensible reason. The height of desire IMO. People who don't give oral, I mean, are they even human really? How does one get married to someone, vow to spend the rest of their days with them, and not have that level of desire for them? At least, initially. I can see 10 years later your man turns out to be a fat slob and you're too turned off by them after years of a bad marriage. But if both people are doing what they need to do, and they just don't like oral, I think they should suffer some cosmic consequences for that. Maybe a tornado takes out your family home. Stocks drop as soon as you buy in. Something! You shouldn't find contentment in life!


----------



## 2ntnuf

Do you know how to tell if a woman is lying? 


Her lips are moving. 


ooohohohoho I know. It's not funny. The men will get it.


----------



## TheDudeLebowski

2ntnuf said:


> Do you know how to tell if a woman is lying?
> 
> 
> Her lips are moving.
> 
> 
> ooohohohoho I know. It's not funny. The men will get it.


Some chubby female pop singer had a song about that with men. I'm sure the ladies get it. 

Women don't have to use their mouths to lie. As Chris Rock said, women are the masters of the visual lie.


----------



## notmyjamie

TheDudeLebowski said:


> But if both people are doing what they need to do, and they just don't like oral, I think they should suffer some cosmic consequences for that. Maybe a tornado takes out your family home. Stocks drop as soon as you buy in. Something! You shouldn't find contentment in life!


Thanks...now all I can think of is my cousin, whose wife refuses to do oral, who had a tree fall right onto the middle of his house. It must have been a cosmic consequence!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :laugh:


----------



## Rocky Mountain Yeti

TheDudeLebowski said:


> If you dont *give* oral, I'm not certain you should ever find happiness in your life.


And yet those who dont *get* oral are the ones who may never find happiness.

Nobody said life is fair.


----------



## TheDudeLebowski

notmyjamie said:


> Thanks...now all I can think of is my cousin, whose wife refuses to do oral, who had a tree fall right onto the middle of his house. It must have been a cosmic consequence!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :laugh:


Poor fellow. She deserved it, but not him.


----------



## TheDudeLebowski

Rocky Mountain Yeti said:


> And yet those who dont *get* oral are the ones who may never find happiness.
> 
> Nobody said life is fair.


True. But that is their choice to remain in that environment. When I'm getting to know a person, I ask if they go down. It's a requirement for my time and friendship that you do. Growing up, there was this thing in the 90s where black men talked about not going down on women. It was some sort of cultural thing I think. This was all in my youth and mostly from black men. So in the 90s, I didn't have a lot of black friends. In 2019, the black community is all about eating ass. Now we are friends again. I will willingly give my time to maintain these friendships. That's how this works. That is how this should all work. We just collectively weed these people out of our lives and the people who don't give oral can go live on an island somewhere. 


Is there any black dudes who post here that can back me up on this really quick btw? Because I swear I'm not making any of that stuff up!


----------



## Rocky Mountain Yeti

TheDudeLebowski said:


> True. But that is their choice to remain in that environment. When I'm getting to know a person, I ask if they go down. It's a requirement for my time and friendship that you do. Growing up, there was this thing in the 90s where black men talked about not going down on women. It was some sort of cultural thing I think. This was all in my youth and mostly from black men. So in the 90s, I didn't have a lot of black friends. In 2019, the black community is all about eating ass. Now we are friends again. I will willingly give my time to maintain these friendships. That's how this works. That is how this should all work. We just collectively weed these people out of our lives and the people who don't give oral can go live on an island somewhere.
> 
> 
> Is there any black dudes who post here that can back me up on this really quick btw? Because I swear I'm not making any of that stuff up!


Well in my case, staying in that environment has to do with making the commitment before being experienced enough to know what you want. I'm not going to divorce over her being uncomfortable (and she has tried) doing something I never had the awareness to tell her I wanted in the first place.

As for the black thing, I'm not black, but I can tell you the black guys I knew also talked about not going down (in my experience, this goes even back into the '80s). They would tell me the only reason white guys go down was to compensate for their small ****s.


----------



## Faithful Wife

Wow you guys....

Ok I’m not complaining! Just....

Ok my personal experience. Black guys are like white guys and some do, some don’t. I was never with one prior to the 2000’s so I don’t know about the way back machine. Also, some are good lovers but some not. They are not actually magic, they are just chocolate. 

As for size, I don’t know. What I’ve encountered has been bigger than average but I’ve had a few friends tell me it’s not always true and not to rely on it. (I think I have read that it is statistically true though, yoink!)

Bottom line, they are like all men in that any one of them may be a good, great or horrible kisser, lover, etc.

Maybe @ReformedHubby will come offer his Tyrone report.


----------



## TheDudeLebowski

Rocky Mountain Yeti said:


> Well in my case, staying in that environment has to do with making the commitment before being experienced enough to know what you want. I'm not going to divorce over her being uncomfortable (and she has tried) doing something I never had the awareness to tell her I wanted in the first place.
> 
> As for the black thing, I'm not black, but I can tell you the black guys I knew also talked about not going down (in my experience, this goes even back into the '80s). They would tell me the only reason white guys go down was to compensate for their small ****s.


Lol. Well they got the saying "once you go black you never go back" and I always told the black ladies "once you go white, you know you've been licked right" as a come back. I think that whole thing has gone away now. I dont hear black dudes talking about refusing to go down anymore. Its about the ass worship now. What a strange stance to take tho. Thanks for backup on that one. Haha


----------



## TheDudeLebowski

Faithful Wife said:


> Wow you guys....
> 
> Ok I’m not complaining! Just....
> 
> Ok my personal experience. Black guys are like white guys and some do, some don’t. I was never with one prior to the 2000’s so I don’t know about the way back machine. Also, some are good lovers but some not. They are not actually magic, they are just chocolate.
> 
> As for size, I don’t know. What I’ve encountered has been bigger than average but I’ve had a few friends tell me it’s not always true and not to rely on it. (I think I have read that it is statistically true though, yoink!)
> 
> Bottom line, they are like all men in that any one of them may be a good, great or horrible kisser, lover, etc.
> 
> Maybe @ReformedHubby will come offer his Tyrone report.



Well, yeah it's true. On average black dudes have bigger junk. You've never seen a black dude with that Jean Simmons tongue tho either. :wink2:


----------



## Mr.Married

I didn't marry you because your rich


----------



## MAJDEATH

Here's a few from my circle of married friends:

1 I've never been married before
2 I wasn't still seeing my ex when we started dating
3 I never had an abortion
4 Number of total lovers (multiply by 3)
5 I've never had an affair
6 I always take my birth control pills -
closely related to:
7 Of course the child is yours
and also
8 No I don't want to order anything from the menu (then she eats half of your food)


----------



## MAJDEATH

Mr.Married said:


> I didn't marry you because your rich


Truth. "So if I worked at a gas station we would still be together?... silence"


----------



## Mr.Married

of course I love your mother .....


----------



## NobodySpecial

AandM said:


> "Rome". HBO series in the early 2000's. He played Titus Pullo, and was trying to explain how to please the wife to his centurion officer Lucius Vorenus. Amusing scene.


I started watching that a while ago. Couldn't get into it.


----------



## AandM

NobodySpecial said:


> I started watching that a while ago. Couldn't get into it.


Meh. Not everything is for everyone. I don't get why everyone is gaga for Game of Thrones.


----------



## Blondilocks

arbitrator said:


> *"I would never ever dream of cheating on anyone but you!" - My RSXW
> 
> Famous last words!*


See what happens when you parse the sentence?


----------



## ConanHub

MAJDEATH said:


> Truth. "So if I worked at a gas station we would still be together?... silence"


That made me smile.

When I met my wife, I was working at a gas station.

We have of course improved financially since then.

I always joke she married me for my money!:grin2:


----------



## ConanHub

Faithful Wife said:


> Wow you guys....
> 
> Ok I’m not complaining! Just....
> 
> Ok my personal experience. Black guys are like white guys and some do, some don’t. I was never with one prior to the 2000’s so I don’t know about the way back machine. Also, some are good lovers but some not. They are not actually magic, they are just chocolate.
> 
> As for size, I don’t know. What I’ve encountered has been bigger than average but I’ve had a few friends tell me it’s not always true and not to rely on it. (I think I have read that it is statistically true though, yoink!)
> 
> Bottom line, they are like all men in that any one of them may be a good, great or horrible kisser, lover, etc.
> 
> Maybe @ReformedHubby will come offer his Tyrone report.


I definitely don't know as good as women. I've had a few black friends and family (our lineage is a bit mixed) and the very few occasions we happened to be sans clothes, they looked pretty average or even below but I have no idea how they look when ready for action.

I was with a couple black girls (would have been more but they were afraid of backlash), and they were just as soft and womanly and passionate as any other ethnicity.

It would make an interesting discussion to talk about anecdotal experiences with different ethnicities in the bedroom.:smile2:


----------



## Faithful Wife

ConanHub said:


> Faithful Wife said:
> 
> 
> 
> Wow you guys....
> 
> Ok I’m not complaining! Just....
> 
> Ok my personal experience. Black guys are like white guys and some do, some don’t. I was never with one prior to the 2000’s so I don’t know about the way back machine. Also, some are good lovers but some not. They are not actually magic, they are just chocolate.
> 
> As for size, I don’t know. What I’ve encountered has been bigger than average but I’ve had a few friends tell me it’s not always true and not to rely on it. (I think I have read that it is statistically true though, yoink!)
> 
> Bottom line, they are like all men in that any one of them may be a good, great or horrible kisser, lover, etc.
> 
> Maybe @ReformedHubby will come offer his Tyrone report.
> 
> 
> 
> I definitely don't know as good as women. I've had a few black friends and family (our lineage is a bit mixed) and the very few occasions we happened to be sans clothes, they looked pretty average or even below but I have no idea how they look when ready for action.
> 
> I was with a couple black girls (would have been more but they were afraid of backlash), and they were just as soft and womanly and passionate as any other ethnicity.
> 
> It would make an interesting discussion to talk about anecdotal experiences with different ethnicities in the bedroom.<a href="http://talkaboutmarriage.com/images/TAMarriage_2015/smilies/tango_face_smile.png" border="0" alt="" title="Smile" ></a>
Click to expand...

Been my experience that you can’t always tell what any guy who is flaccid will be like when not. (Except the grower showers of course).

I can’t offer enough varied experience to make any opinions about definitive differences between groups. Only thing that I have felt is that different skin colors turn me on!
@ReformedHubby and I talked a little about the differences between dating a black or white person (in our experiences). Mostly just some cultural differences and such. It depends on where you live, too. The white and black culture is different where he and I live.


----------



## ConanHub

Faithful Wife said:


> Been my experience that you can’t always tell what any guy who is flaccid will be like when not. (Except the grower showers of course).
> 
> I can’t offer enough varied experience to make any opinions about definitive differences between groups. Only thing that I have felt is that different skin colors turn me on!
> @ReformedHubby and I talked a little about the differences between dating a black or white person (in our experiences). Mostly just some cultural differences and such. It depends on where you live, too. The white and black culture is different where he and I live.


I love the variations. People look good across the spectrum to me.


----------



## notmyjamie

TheDudeLebowski said:


> True. But that is their choice to remain in that environment. When I'm getting to know a person, I ask if they go down. It's a requirement for my time and friendship that you do.


And now I'm picturing you at a party:

Dude: "Hey...I'm Dude...nice to meet you."

New couple: "Hi...we're..."

Dude: Sorry to interrupt, but before this goes any further, I need to know...do you two go down on each other? 

New couple: "Um...no"

Dude: "Well then, I'm tapping out of this conversation. Bye losers!!!"

>


----------



## AliceA

I just lied to a guy last night, but I figured he's done the same thing to me enough times that I'd return the favour.

Him: asking if I'd contact him over the weekend

Me: "Sure" which was shorthand for, "Not a ****ing chance"


----------



## TheDudeLebowski

notmyjamie said:


> And now I'm picturing you at a party:
> 
> Dude: "Hey...I'm Dude...nice to meet you."
> 
> New couple: "Hi...we're..."
> 
> Dude: Sorry to interrupt, but before this goes any further, I need to know...do you two go down on each other?
> 
> New couple: "Um...no"
> 
> Dude: "Well then, I'm tapping out of this conversation. Bye losers!!!"
> 
> >



I don't think I would be that polite tbh. I'm tame on here because the mods are good people and have been very fair to me. I don't want to give them extra work cleaning up all messes.


----------



## 269370

MaiChi said:


> But this is an interesting statement for many women. I cannot say whether or not size matters as I have only ever know his size. I measured it when he kept asking me if it was the right size. I told him it did not matter at all, which it does not. I am very happy with it. But he thinks a little more would be better. I do not.




Then why did you measure it if it didn’t matter?  Now he might think you might want to find out if it does matter...

Always measure from the coccyx btw. Then tell all your girlfriends and print it on a billboard for maximum effect. That’s what devoted wives do 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## 269370

MaiChi said:


> How many have we counted so far?
> 
> 
> 
> Men also think women tell lies about headaches.




Wife told me that sex is the best thing to make headaches go away. And apparently no other penis size/shape would make it go away as much as mine...
Do these statements belong to this thread I wonder? 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## Andy1001

InMyPrime said:


> Wife told me that sex is the best thing to make headaches go away. And apparently no other penis size/shape would make it go away as much as mine...
> Do these statements belong to this thread I wonder?
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


I think it would depend on which of you had the headache.


----------



## 269370

Andy1001 said:


> I think it would depend on which of you had the headache.



My ‘aches’ are usually focused mostly in one kind of head...


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## MJJEAN

Andy1001 said:


> I think it would depend on which of you had the headache.


Doesn't matter. Little head cures headache in big heads. Apparently, blood flow changes and all those happy little hormones flood our system to get rid of the mean ol headache. Sex is also a good pick me up when having a hard time waking or feeling a little under the weather.

In my marriage "medicinal sex" is a thing.


----------



## 269370

MJJEAN said:


> Doesn't matter. Little head cures headache in big heads. Apparently, blood flow changes and all those happy little hormones flood our system to get rid of the mean ol headache. Sex is also a good pick me up when having a hard time waking or feeling a little under the weather.
> 
> In my marriage "medicinal sex" is a thing.




Are we still supposed to be lying or is this now for real?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## tech-novelist

SecondWind said:


> You're a good lover.
> 
> I don't mind (fill in the blank.)
> 
> I only think of you when we have sex.


So she never thinks of him other than during sex? >


----------



## Marc878

OH, OH, YES!!!!!!! AHHHHHH YES!!!!!!!!! That was really great!!!!! (looks at her watch and yawns)


----------



## [email protected]

Well, one of them told the truth, so I dumped her.


----------



## She'sStillGotIt

My husband can't stand message boards and doesn't read them, but since he knows my screen name here on TAM, my answer is that I've never lied to my wonderful husband and I'm appalled at those women who *do* lie to their men. 0


----------



## MJJEAN

InMyPrime said:


> Are we still supposed to be lying or is this now for real?
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


Google it, my friend. Totally serious and for real. "I have a headache." is no longer a reason to avoid sex, it is actually a reason to have sex. Dopamine, endorphins, and serotonin released during sex and orgasm are natural pain relievers. Sex can also temporarily relieve symptoms of depression, anxiety, insomnia, nausea, and even relieve menstrual cramps for women. Sex also reduces stress hormones and lowers blood pressure. Of course, this is assuming the sex is enjoyable and orgasm is achieved. 

Masturbation to orgasm gets similar results, but partnered sex seems to have slightly more physical benefit as we release more of those happy hormones with a partner than we do solo.


----------



## 269370

MJJEAN said:


> Google it, my friend. Totally serious and for real. "I have a headache." is no longer a reason to avoid sex, it is actually a reason to have sex. Dopamine, endorphins, and serotonin released during sex and orgasm are natural pain relievers. Sex can also temporarily relieve symptoms of depression, anxiety, insomnia, nausea, and even relieve menstrual cramps for women. Sex also reduces stress hormones and lowers blood pressure. Of course, this is assuming the sex is enjoyable and orgasm is achieved.
> 
> 
> 
> Masturbation to orgasm gets similar results, but partnered sex seems to have slightly more physical benefit as we release more of those happy hormones with a partner than we do solo.




Oh I know. I was just wondering if I’m supposed to take as a lie as well. Since this thread is about ‘everything your wife ever told you is a bald faced lie!’  


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## 269370

MJJEAN said:


> Masturbation to orgasm gets similar results, but partnered sex seems to have slightly more physical benefit as we release more of those happy hormones with a partner than we do solo.



Btw is it possible to have sex and release ‘very sad hormones’ instead?



Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## MJJEAN

InMyPrime said:


> Oh I know. I was just wondering if I’m supposed to take as a lie as well. Since this thread is about ‘everything your wife ever told you is a bald faced lie!’


"I can't tonight. I have a headache." is the lie. 

Well, sort of. I mean, I'm sure a lot of people don't realize sex would help or aren't able to have enjoyable sex while in some level of discomfort, and aren't knowingly lying.



InMyPrime said:


> Btw is it possible to have sex and release ‘very sad hormones’ instead?


I think so. I've had sex that was so bad it left me feeling damn depressed afterward.


----------



## Elizabeth001

Husband and wife go to bed. Husband hands wife a couple of Tylenol. Wife says “What’s this for?”. Husband says “Your headache”. Wife says “But I don’t have a headache.” Husband says “Ahha!”

hehe


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## ConanHub

Elizabeth001 said:


> Husband and wife go to bed. Husband hands wife a couple of Tylenol. Wife says “What’s this for?”. Husband says “Your headache”. Wife says “But I don’t have a headache.” Husband says “Ahha!”
> 
> hehe
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


Ninja skills....


----------



## 2ntnuf

I'm pregnant/not pregnant.

I did that already. 

"What happened to that shirt I like", he asks? Haven't seen it(she threw it in garbage).


----------



## Bibi1031

I love you for you, not what you have.


----------



## SunCMars

...


----------



## MJJEAN

2ntnuf said:


> "What happened to that shirt I like", he asks?
> 
> "Haven't seen it." (she threw it in garbage).


Shirt? Pfft! 

"What happened to that _chair_ I liked?"

"I don't know. I guess the recliner-y bits must have broke... or something."


----------



## Blondilocks

MJJEAN said:


> Shirt? Pfft!
> 
> "What happened to that _chair_ I liked?"
> 
> *"I don't know. I guess the recliner-y bits must have broke... or something."*




Says the woman who can tear down a car engine and rebuild it. Balls, girl, you got balls!:smthumbup:


----------



## 269370

MJJEAN said:


> I think so. I've had sex that was so bad it left me feeling damn depressed afterward.



I find it so hard to relate to this. I mean for me personally, the only way sex could be bad is if I wasn’t attracted to the person I was having sex with. If I’m attracted, she could literally just lie there dead and I would think it was amazing afterwards!

I guess it’s different for women where sex is more likely ‘being done to them’...(sorry, my fellow feminist friends )


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## BioFury

Faithful Wife said:


> Wow you guys....
> 
> Ok I’m not complaining! Just....
> 
> Ok my personal experience. Black guys are like white guys and some do, some don’t. I was never with one prior to the 2000’s so I don’t know about the way back machine. Also, some are good lovers but some not. They are not actually magic, they are just chocolate.
> 
> As for size, I don’t know. What I’ve encountered has been bigger than average but I’ve had a few friends tell me it’s not always true and not to rely on it. (I think I have read that it is statistically true though, yoink!)
> 
> Bottom line, they are like all men in that any one of them may be a good, great or horrible kisser, lover, etc.


Statistically, whites have an average length of 5.7 inches, with a girth of 4.8 inches. While blacks have an average length of 5.8 inches, with a girth also of 4.8 inches.


----------



## MJJEAN

Blondilocks said:


> [/B]
> 
> Says the woman who can tear down a car engine and rebuild it. Balls, girl, you got balls!:smthumbup:


Well, see, if he questions it further I can always explain in excruciating detail my research and decision making process. Using the chair example, I'd go into how I diagnosed the problem, how I went online to see if a fix was possible, what product I could use and it's cost, the expected time investment, tools I may have to buy, etc. This sharing of information would include things like what I thought of each individual web site I visited, how well made the product looked, how I can't believe so many people give bad reviews when it's clear they just didn't read and follow the directions, and a side tangent about social media making people incapable of paying attention for more than 30 seconds. 

Oh, and come to think of it, I'd have had to totally reupholster that worn and ugly chair since I'd have it taken apart, anyway. Then I'd start explaining the different fabrics I could use and their durability, ask what color he thinks would work with the other furniture, but then maybe we should...

Quarter of the way through his eyes glaze over. Bout half way through he just agrees with whatever.



InMyPrime said:


> If I’m attracted, she could literally just lie there dead and I would think it was amazing afterwards!


Your standards are way too low! I require attraction, active participation, and at least some skill. Bonus points for imagination, stamina, and complimentary kinks. Why bother with a guy who's just going to lay there? The lust feedback loop is important! If all I wanted was to get myself off by wriggling around on something hard I could grab a toy and not have to bother shaving my legs.


----------



## Faithful Wife

BioFury said:


> Statistically, whites have an average length of 5.7 inches, with a girth of 4.8 inches. While blacks have an average length of 5.8 inches, with a girth also of 4.8 inches.


Is that American black guys or Africans? :grin2: Also are those soft or hard length measurements?

As I said previously, my sample count is too low to use for anything but my friends have told me that the rumor is not always true, and that you never really know based on skin color, stats, height, nose size, feet size, etc.

A girl simply has to wait until she gets to know him well enough to start asking questions about this kind of thing.

Well, that or he just sends a pic of it in the first 10 minutes and then you don't have to waste any time. >

....

Ok let me say for the record...I love to joke around about this....but pull a ruler out, people. Six full inches is QUITE LONG. (and delicious)


----------



## ConanHub

Faithful Wife said:


> Is that American black guys or Africans? :grin2: Also are those soft or hard length measurements?
> 
> As I said previously, my sample count is too low to use for anything but my friends have told me that the rumor is not always true, and that you never really know based on skin color, stats, height, nose size, feet size, etc.
> 
> A girl simply has to wait until she gets to know him well enough to start asking questions about this kind of thing.
> 
> Well, that or he just sends a pic of it in the first 10 minutes and then you don't have to waste any time. >
> 
> ....
> 
> Ok let me say for the record...I love to joke around about this....but pull a ruler out, people. Six full inches is QUITE LONG. (and delicious)


The largest recorded on a currently living man is pretty monstrous and belongs to a not very tall white man in below average shape.:wink2:

It is hard to miss though if he gets aroused at all he needs a carrying case for that cannon!>


----------



## BioFury

Faithful Wife said:


> Is that American black guys or Africans? :grin2: Also are those soft or hard length measurements?
> 
> As I said previously, my sample count is too low to use for anything but my friends have told me that the rumor is not always true, and that you never really know based on skin color, stats, height, nose size, feet size, etc.
> 
> A girl simply has to wait until she gets to know him well enough to start asking questions about this kind of thing.
> 
> Well, that or he just sends a pic of it in the first 10 minutes and then you don't have to waste any time. >
> 
> ....
> 
> Ok let me say for the record...I love to joke around about this....but pull a ruler out, people. Six full inches is QUITE LONG. (and delicious)


According to the study, it encompassed the entire ethnicity - both African Americans, and Africans. 

Yeah, I feel your pain. I face the same thing with girl's butts. Is it really nice, and the jeans are reflecting that? Is it really bad, and is just being flattered _by_ the jeans? Or, do the jeans actually not flatter it, but it is in truth, really nice? Keeps me up at night :wink2:

6.3 inches in length was in fact the preferred "build-a-penis" size that women chose for a long term partner :grin2:


----------



## Faithful Wife

BioFury said:


> According to the study, it encompassed the entire ethnicity - both African Americans, and Africans.
> 
> Yeah, I feel your pain. I face the same thing with girl's butts. Is it really nice, and the jeans are reflecting that? Is it really bad, and is just being flattered _by_ the jeans? Or, do the jeans actually not flatter it, but it is in truth, really nice? Keeps me up at night :wink2:
> 
> *6.3 inches in length was in fact the preferred "build-a-penis" size that women chose for a long term partner *:grin2:


Depending on the survey, some surveys have different answers. 

Re: a girl's ass...I'm not sure that jeans can take a bad looking ass and make it so much better than it really is that you or any guy would be like "oh no!" if you saw her without her jeans. They just don't have quite that much power. I mean, you can take a nice ass and put it in 10 pairs of jeans and all 10 may make the ass looking slightly different or better or worse, but none of them are going to make the ass look completely different than it is. So if its a good ass, the jeans aren't going to take that away. :laugh:


----------



## Faithful Wife

ConanHub said:


> *The largest recorded on a currently living man* is pretty monstrous and belongs to a not very tall white man in below average shape.:wink2:
> 
> It is hard to miss though if he gets aroused at all he needs a carrying case for that cannon!>


Yes...I know. These are the types of things I know about. :grin2:


----------



## BioFury

Faithful Wife said:


> Depending on the survey, some surveys have different answers.
> 
> Re: a girl's ass...I'm not sure that jeans can take a bad looking ass and make it so much better than it really is that you or any guy would be like "oh no!" if you saw her without her jeans. They just don't have quite that much power. I mean, you can take a nice ass and put it in 10 pairs of jeans and all 10 may make the ass looking slightly different or better or worse, but none of them are going to make the ass look completely different than it is. So if its a good ass, the jeans aren't going to take that away. :laugh:


I don't have any experience peeling girls out of their jeans, so I'll have to take your word for it. A nice butt is a must-have for me though, so I worry I'll end up with a girl who doesn't have a butt that makes me hot for her. I concur that jeans likely can't make a complete ruin look grand. But they do distort the natural shape. So how I imagine a girls butt looks, based on how it looks in a skirt, dress, or jeans, my be nothing like what it is in the flesh.

For instance, I talked to a girl back in the day, and after we had talked for a while she asked what I liked best. She had already sent pictures of her in jeans, and it looked nice. But after she asked about my body preferences, and I answered, she told me that her butt looks like Jennifer Lopez's, only less toned. At which point alarm bells went off inside my head. It turns out, her jeans compressed her butt and made it look athletic, and sculpted. When, according to her, it was not. Or as her sister said "Jeans almost make your butt look normal!".


----------



## Faithful Wife

BioFury said:


> I don't have any experience peeling girls out of their jeans, so I'll have to take your word for it. A nice butt is a must-have for me though, so I worry I'll end up with a girl who doesn't have a butt that makes me hot for her. I concur that jeans likely can't make a complete ruin look grand. But they do distort the natural shape. So how I imagine a girls butt looks, based on how it looks in a skirt, dress, or jeans, my be nothing like what it is in the flesh.
> 
> For instance, I talked to a girl back in the day, and after we had talked for a while she asked what I liked best. She had already sent pictures of her in jeans, and it looked nice. But after she asked about my body preferences, and I answered, she told me that her butt looks like Jennifer Lopez's, only less toned. At which point alarm bells went off inside my head. It turns out, her jeans compressed her butt and made it look athletic, and sculpted. When, according to her, it was not. Or as her sister said "Jeans almost make your butt look normal!".


Just ask all new dates to model their fave yoga pants for you. You can't fake nuttin in yoga pants!


----------



## BioFury

Faithful Wife said:


> Just ask all new dates to model their fave yoga pants for you. You can't fake nuttin in yoga pants!


Would if I could. The girls I date aren't the type to wear yoga pants in a public setting. Though she might give me a private show, if she was really into me :grin2: I do tend to draw the naughty ones >


----------



## ConanHub

BioFury said:


> Would if I could. The girls I date aren't the type to wear yoga pants in a public setting. Though she might give me a private show, if she was really into me :grin2: I do tend to draw the naughty ones >


No naked pics?!?!?!!!!

Just what kind of womenz are you trying to date?!?!??:wink2:


----------



## BioFury

ConanHub said:


> No naked pics?!?!?!!!!
> 
> Just what kind of womenz are you trying to date?!?!??:wink2:


Ones that hopefully have nice butts >


----------



## Faithful Wife

It is super cute that "wearing yoga pants" and maybe actually wearing them in front of you is what you consider "naughty".


----------



## ConanHub

BioFury said:


> Ones that hopefully have nice butts >


Aaaaammmeeennnnn!!!!!!!:grin2:

Preach on brother!!


----------



## ConanHub

Faithful Wife said:


> It is super cute that "wearing yoga pants" and maybe actually wearing them in front of you is what you consider "naughty".


QFT.:wink2:


----------



## 269370

BioFury said:


> Statistically, whites have an average length of 5.7 inches, with a girth of 4.8 inches. While blacks have an average length of 5.8 inches, with a girth also of 4.8 inches.



What about when it’s erect? The measures reverse themselves surely? 
Statistically, I knew deep down I is always black...


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## 269370

MJJEAN said:


> Your standards are way too low! I require attraction, active participation, and at least some skill. Bonus points for imagination, stamina, and complimentary kinks. Why bother with a guy who's just going to lay there? The lust feedback loop is important! If all I wanted was to get myself off by wriggling around on something hard I could grab a toy and not have to bother shaving my legs.



Sure, yeah. My point was more that a guy can’t get away with ‘just laying there’. A very attractive woman can and still be a great...lay (?), in layman’s terms. It’s less to do with standards, but more with biology...
Or to be politically correct: ‘socialising’. (When society gave men a penis in order to play an active role in insemination).




Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## ConanHub

InMyPrime said:


> Sure, yeah. My point was more that a guy can’t get away with ‘just laying there’. A very attractive woman can and still be a great...lay (?), in layman’s terms.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


Nope. Layman's terms is funny!

I've been with a few very attractive women. A couple we're duds in the sack and it was fun, cause mostly sex is, but no where near great or even good.

The wildest was fairly average looking. One of the hottest women was the runner up but she was evil so bad trade off.:grin2:


----------



## 269370

ConanHub said:


> The largest recorded on a currently living man is pretty monstrous and belongs to a not very tall white man in below average shape.:wink2:
> 
> 
> 
> It is hard to miss though if he gets aroused at all he needs a carrying case for that cannon!>




I read that erections above 6 inches cause you to loose consciousness because it needs so much blood pumping into one place only that it takes it all away from the brains  . So pick you poison: either have sex with a skilled but conscious small **** or a dead man with a HUGE cork.
(I need to lie down now, feel dizzey...)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## ConanHub

InMyPrime said:


> I read that erections above 6 inches cause you to loose consciousness because it needs so much blood pumping into one place only that it takes it all away from the brains  . So pick you poison: either have sex with a skilled but conscious small **** or a dead man with a HUGE cork.
> (I need to lie down now, feel dizzey...)
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## 269370

ConanHub said:


> Nope. Layman's terms is funny!
> 
> 
> 
> I've been with a few very attractive women. A couple we're duds in the sack and it was fun, cause mostly sex is, but no where near great or even good.
> 
> 
> 
> The wildest was fairly average looking. One of the hottest women was the runner up but she was evil so bad trade off.:grin2:




Ok, well I have only had great to amazing sex in my life (same person)...The reason in difference was only due to my own mood.

I did sexual stuff with few other girls before my wife (rather, they did stuff to me). And no matter their technique or enthusiasm, I just wasn’t that into it. I remember thinking at the time “yeah, um, the mouth and tongue thing feels great on it but if we weren’t doing this right now, it would be ok too...”

I always thought it was such a subjective perspective and nobody could ever describe to me what the difference is between great sex and ‘meh’.

I mean yeah sometimes she’s more horny or enthusiastic but it doesn’t really change much the actual experience for me, as long as it’s with HER..I always feel a kind of burning inside, i can’t explain it, like you haven’t drunk water for 2 days and suddenly found a really wet creak all to yourself...(did I say creak?...)

I don’t think skill is at all a substitute to the person.



Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## MAJDEATH

BioFury said:


> According to the study, it encompassed the entire ethnicity - both African Americans, and Africans.
> 
> Yeah, I feel your pain. I face the same thing with girl's butts. Is it really nice, and the jeans are reflecting that? Is it really bad, and is just being flattered _by_ the jeans? Or, do the jeans actually not flatter it, but it is in truth, really nice? Keeps me up at night :wink2:
> 
> 6*.3 inches in length was in fact the preferred "build-a-penis" size that women chose for a long term partner :grin2:*


I don't think it is so much about raw size, but more about a good fit. Women may look at a diagram and think they might want a certain size (especially around their girlfriends), but what works best in reality might be far different from expectations. Open a steel tape measure and lock it at 8.5 inches. It looks huge to the naked eye but this is what makes my W feel the best, and she is barely over 5 feet tall. So her mistake would be to say that she doesn't need a good sized partner, but the truth is far different.


----------



## Personal

BioFury said:


> I do tend to draw the naughty ones >


So do I, in fact I was drawing a young naked one of those last night, of which my wife really liked my drawings of her as did she. I haven't drawn any nude models for a few months now, so it was good to get back into it again.

At the moment I mostly use Staedtler mechanical pencils with Staedtler leads, often with a Winsor & Newton watercolour wash. Plus I also sometimes use Prismacolor coloured pencils as well.

So what do you draw them with?


----------



## aine

InMyPrime said:


> Ok, well I have only had great to amazing sex in my life (same person)...The reason in difference was only due to my own mood.
> 
> I did sexual stuff with few other girls before my wife (rather, they did stuff to me). And no matter their technique or enthusiasm, I just wasn’t that into it. I remember thinking at the time “yeah, um, the mouth and tongue thing feels great on it but if we weren’t doing this right now, it would be ok too...”
> 
> I always thought it was such a subjective perspective and nobody could ever describe to me what the difference is between great sex and ‘meh’.
> 
> I mean yeah sometimes she’s more horny or enthusiastic but it doesn’t really change much the actual experience for me, as long as it’s with HER..I always feel a kind of burning inside, i can’t explain it, like you haven’t drunk water for 2 days and suddenly found a really wet creak all to yourself...(did I say creak?...)
> 
> I don’t think skill is at all a substitute to the person.
> 
> These puns are killing me 'a wet crack' oops I read that wrong.....................
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## aine

This thread is funny
It started off talking about lies women tell but somehow ended up with men bragging about their baggage, or perhaps 'lying' about their baggage...........


----------



## 2ntnuf

MJJEAN said:


> Shirt? Pfft!
> 
> "What happened to that _chair_ I liked?"
> 
> "I don't know. I guess the recliner-y bits must have broke... or something."


I'm pretty sure throwing away a man's recliner is addressed in the bible. It's that serious. lol


----------



## 2ntnuf

I'm also pretty sure, if you're feeling a burning sensation, you should see your doctor. 

My feeling was more of a longing. That was a really good explanation, though... other than that burning sensation.


----------



## MJJEAN

InMyPrime said:


> Sure, yeah. My point was more that a guy can’t get away with ‘just laying there’. A very attractive woman can and still be a great...lay (?), in layman’s terms. It’s less to do with standards, but more with biology...
> Or to be politically correct: ‘socialising’. (When society gave men a penis in order to play an active role in insemination).


I've had more than one guy say that being able to _say_ they banged SuperHotChick in a starfish situation was much more fun than actually _doing_ it. I guess it's a matter of what a guy considers good sex. YMMV. 



ConanHub said:


> I've been with a few very attractive women. A couple were duds in the sack and it was fun, cause mostly sex is, but no where near great or even good.
> 
> The wildest was fairly average looking. One of the hottest women was the runner up but she was evil so bad trade off.:grin2:


0 "Conan, you should not date Evil. You must not have sex with her again or there could be dire consequences to your life and soul."

> "Yeah, yeah, yeah, but she's hot _and _the sex is _really _good. You're not walking away from that just because she's a tad evil, are you?"


----------



## Mr.Married

InMyPrime said:


> Sure, yeah. My point was more that a guy can’t get away with ‘just laying there’.
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk



I bet some of the girls would say they have unfortunately had a few of them just lay there ..... waiting for her to do all the work.


----------



## Faithful Wife

aine said:


> This thread is funny
> It started off talking about lies women tell but somehow ended up with men bragging about their baggage, or perhaps 'lying' about their baggage...........


Did you mean package rather than baggage? 

But yes. Every thread is a penis thread waiting to happen, which of course means men telling us their size. All TAM men are 7 inches, which is not on the international size charts because they did not consider it a statistically significant amount of men to count. However if they had been counted, it would be clear that reading TAM makes the average man’s penis 1 inch longer.


----------



## Middle of Everything

Faithful Wife said:


> Did you mean package rather than baggage?
> 
> But yes. Every thread is a penis thread waiting to happen, which of course means men telling us their size. All TAM men are 7 inches, which is not on the international size charts because they did not consider it a statistically significant amount of men to count. However if they had been counted, it would be clear that reading TAM makes the average man’s penis 1 inch longer.


Thats the interwebs.

On a college football site I frequent its a running joke that all posters bench 400lbs, squat 600lbs, and run a 4.4 40yds.


----------



## Lila

BioFury said:


> Faithful Wife said:
> 
> 
> 
> Wow you guys....
> 
> Ok I’m not complaining! Just....
> 
> Ok my personal experience. Black guys are like white guys and some do, some don’t. I was never with one prior to the 2000’s so I don’t know about the way back machine. Also, some are good lovers but some not. They are not actually magic, they are just chocolate.
> 
> As for size, I don’t know. What I’ve encountered has been bigger than average but I’ve had a few friends tell me it’s not always true and not to rely on it. (I think I have read that it is statistically true though, yoink!)
> 
> Bottom line, they are like all men in that any one of them may be a good, great or horrible kisser, lover, etc.
> 
> 
> 
> Statistically, whites have an average length of 5.7 inches, with a girth of 4.8 inches. While blacks have an average length of 5.8 inches, with a girth also of 4.8 inches.
Click to expand...

I'm curious... Where did you find these statistics? The last research study I read was for 2015 and included over 15k participants. The average erect length was 5.18 inches with 90% of men measuring between 4 and 6 in.


----------



## Mr.Married

Faithful Wife said:


> Did you mean package rather than baggage?
> 
> But yes. Every thread is a penis thread waiting to happen, which of course means men telling us their size. All TAM men are 7 inches, which is not on the international size charts because they did not consider it a statistically significant amount of men to count. However if they had been counted, it would be clear that reading TAM makes the average man’s penis 1 inch longer.


Are you kidding me ...... I'm 7" all the way. I start measuring at my butt cheek. >>


----------



## Rocky Mountain Yeti

Mr.Married said:


> Are you kidding me ...... I'm 7" all the way. I start measuring at my butt cheek. >>


That's cheating. Everyone must start at the same point.

But I measure in centimeters and report in inches.


----------



## Middle of Everything

Rocky Mountain Yeti said:


> That's cheating. Everyone must start at the same point.
> 
> But I measure in centimeters and report in inches.


10.16"? Impressive. Most impressive.


----------



## Faithful Wife

It’s like a confused math lady meme in here every time penis size is discussed.


----------



## Rocky Mountain Yeti

Faithful Wife said:


> It’s like a confused math lady meme in here every time penis size is discussed.


That's understandable.


----------



## Faithful Wife

Rocky Mountain Yeti said:


> Faithful Wife said:
> 
> 
> 
> It’s like a confused math lady meme in here every time penis size is discussed.
> 
> 
> 
> That's understandable.
Click to expand...

I meant the men are the confused ones. Ha!


----------



## BioFury

Lila said:


> I'm curious... Where did you find these statistics? The last research study I read was for 2015 and included over 15k participants. The average erect length was 5.18 inches with 90% of men measuring between 4 and 6 in.


Penissizes.org, lol.


----------



## BioFury

Personal said:


> So do I, in fact I was drawing a young naked one of those last night, of which my wife really liked my drawings of her as did she. I haven't drawn any nude models for a few months now, so it was good to get back into it again.
> 
> At the moment I mostly use Staedtler mechanical pencils with Staedtler leads, often with a Winsor & Newton watercolour wash. Plus I also sometimes use Prismacolor coloured pencils as well.
> 
> So what do you draw them with?


By draw, I meant they're drawn to me :smile2: I wish I was awesome enough that women were constantly saying "I want you to draw me like one of your french girls", but that's not likely to happen, lol.


----------



## Personal

@BioFury, there's nothing stopping you from getting a sketch book, a pencil and finding a nearby life drawing group then giving it a go. With practice and a bit of guidance you might find you get good at it and may enjoy the activity.

That said drawing a foreshortened figure can sometimes be a challenge.


----------



## Faithful Wife

The only time anyone ever drew me nude was when I was friends with the artist John Callahan. He paid me to model for him, as he did with other women he knew as friends or acquaintances. He created a lot of erotic art, far more than was ever published. Most of it sold as separate pieces in galleries and there were no prints made.

The ones he did of me were not like that, they were informal sketches. Though one was particularly good and he spent a lot of time on it. He hung it in his kitchen for a long time and it was there when I would visit. He told me everyone wanted to know who the girl in the picture was and he would tell them "just a lovely friend of mine".

If you don't know who he is, he was paralyzed and drew very Picaso like pictures and paintings with his limited use of his arms and hands. But they had a raw edge to them and a true talent was there, besides his comedic wit which made his cartoons so popular. The drawing of me was his usual surrealist style, no one could ever identify me in it. But it was beautiful in a cool way, very bohemian.

When he died, I contacted his family and asked if I could have the picture, or at least a photo of it. They dug around in dozens of boxes of literally hundreds of drawings and found it for me and sent a photo of it. The reason they could find it was because I described the pose I was sitting in very specifically, which was not a natural pose. It was obvious I had to be "posing" for this picture, versus resting or doing something else. It meant a lot to me to see it again. And then I went...oh dear god, I can't let anyone ever see this if they know it is me. Ha ha! So while it is incredibly cool, I cannot show it to anyone or hang it on my wall or anything.


----------



## Middle of Everything

Personal said:


> @BioFury, there's nothing stopping you from getting a sketch book, a pencil and finding a nearby life drawing group then giving it a go. With practice and a bit of guidance you might find you get good at it and may enjoy the activity.
> 
> That said drawing a foreshortened figure can sometimes be a challenge.


True. At least for me foreshortened limbs and/or people always looked fat and lumpy if I didnt pull it off just right. NOT what you want a lady friend to see. :grin2:


----------



## aine

Faithful Wife said:


> Did you mean package rather than baggage?
> 
> But yes. Every thread is a penis thread waiting to happen, which of course means men telling us their size. All TAM men are 7 inches, which is not on the international size charts because they did not consider it a statistically significant amount of men to count. However if they had been counted, it would be clear that reading TAM makes the average man’s penis 1 inch longer.


LOL double entendre intended FW 😜😜😂


----------



## Faithful Wife

aine said:


> Faithful Wife said:
> 
> 
> 
> Did you mean package rather than baggage?
> 
> But yes. Every thread is a penis thread waiting to happen, which of course means men telling us their size. All TAM men are 7 inches, which is not on the international size charts because they did not consider it a statistically significant amount of men to count. However if they had been counted, it would be clear that reading TAM makes the average man’s penis 1 inch longer.
> 
> 
> 
> LOL double entendre intended FW 😜😜😂
Click to expand...

Ha ha!


----------



## Faithful Wife

Here’s a new one I’ve only recently been saying...

I’m really not a cougar.


----------



## AandM

Faithful Wife said:


> Did you mean package rather than baggage?
> 
> But yes. Every thread is a penis thread waiting to happen, which of course means men telling us their size. All TAM men are 7 inches, which is not on the international size charts because they did not consider it a statistically significant amount of men to count. However if they had been counted, it would be clear that reading TAM makes the average man’s penis 1 inch longer.


Mmm, I don't know. I've posted my stats in another thread ( condom issues ), and I'm a measly little over 6" long. Am over 6 and half around, but who cares?

You tell me your lies, I'll tell you yours0


----------



## Faithful Wife

AandM said:


> Faithful Wife said:
> 
> 
> 
> Did you mean package rather than baggage?
> 
> But yes. Every thread is a penis thread waiting to happen, which of course means men telling us their size. All TAM men are 7 inches, which is not on the international size charts because they did not consider it a statistically significant amount of men to count. However if they had been counted, it would be clear that reading TAM makes the average man’s penis 1 inch longer.
> 
> 
> 
> Mmm, I don't know. I've posted my stats in another thread ( condom issues ), and I'm a measly little over 6" long. Am over 6 and half around, but who cares?
> 
> You tell me your lies, I'll tell you yours<a href="http://talkaboutmarriage.com/images/TAMarriage_2015/smilies/tango_face_angel.png" border="0" alt="" title="Angel" ></a>
Click to expand...

I know you rounded down just to not look like you are bragging and not make everyone else feel bad. That’s sweet.


----------



## AandM

Faithful Wife said:


> I know you rounded down just to not look like you are bragging and not make everyone else feel bad. That’s sweet.


Yeah.

Wait, what?


----------



## AandM

Faithful Wife said:


> I know you rounded down just to not look like you are bragging and not make everyone else feel bad. That’s sweet.


I'm not bagging, err, bragging.

I think it's hot that you think it's sweet. It must mean it's good.


----------



## AandM

"You're giving it away for free? It must be good!"

"But wait, there's more!"


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## Faithful Wife

AandM said:


> Faithful Wife said:
> 
> 
> 
> I know you rounded down just to not look like you are bragging and not make everyone else feel bad. That’s sweet.
> 
> 
> 
> I'm not bagging, err, bragging.
> 
> I think it's hot that you think it's sweet. It must mean it's good.
Click to expand...

I’m just extremely goofy and have a whole penis schtick going on here. Thank you for playing along.

Random side note...

A friend of mine who is recently single is dipping her toes in some online adventures and she has not done this before during the smart phone age.

So she has so far had a few guys hinting about sending **** pics, which she knew to expect. But it still kind of shocked her.

I told her that it seemed to me that at least 85% of men are **** exhibitionists, and they want to send it to you so badly that it’s just hysterical, really.

I’ve shared with her my mad **** pic adventures over the past couple of years (she was married then) so she was aware. But you still just don’t really get how common it is until it happens to you. You think everyone is exaggerating. We aren’t.

I’ve gotten to the point where I make bets with myself about how long it will take with this guy.

Many don’t do it, and you can tell who they are. They are a nice refreshing blast of class.

But I’m not saying it’s always unwelcome either. Even if I’m never gonna meet a guy (or especially, in some cases) I may be curious enough to glance at it. I haven’t ever really been sorry. Hee!

Anyway, girl friend texted me tonight “how do I screen shot! I just got my first **** pic!”

Ha ha! I was laughing so hard I couldn’t respond...mainly because she doesn’t know how to screen shot...and then she reported that the pic timed out and she lost it. With a bunch of crying faces.

And I said that’s because you’re not supposed to screen shot that stuff you perv! We both laughed and signed off. But she said she is gonna practice so she can catch one next time.

Hilarious!


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## AandM

Yeah, the ****-pic thing is something I've not understood. 

Maybe, if its just big enough, a woman will go, "Arrggh! I must be speared by the white whale (no racist}.

Otherwise, why the **** would a woman respond to pictures of a flabby fat ass who is MySpace-angling his **** as his selfie. 



Faithful Wife said:


> I’m just extremely goofy and have a whole penis schtick going on here. Thank you for playing along.
> 
> Random side note...
> 
> A friend of mine who is recently single is dipping her toes in some online adventures and she has not done this before during the smart phone age.
> 
> So she has so far had a few guys hinting about sending **** pics, which she knew to expect. But it still kind of shocked her.
> 
> I told her that it seemed to me that at least 85% of men are **** exhibitionists, and they want to send it to you so badly that it’s just hysterical, really.
> 
> I’ve shared with her my mad **** pic adventures over the past couple of years (she was married then) so she was aware. But you still just don’t really get how common it is until it happens to you. You think everyone is exaggerating. We aren’t.
> 
> I’ve gotten to the point where I make bets with myself about how long it will take with this guy.
> 
> Many don’t do it, and you can tell who they are. They are a nice refreshing blast of class.
> 
> But I’m not saying it’s always unwelcome either. Even if I’m never gonna meet a guy (or especially, in some cases) I may be curious enough to glance at it. I haven’t ever really been sorry. Hee!
> 
> Anyway, girl friend texted me tonight “how do I screen shot! I just got my first **** pic!”
> 
> Ha ha! I was laughing so hard I couldn’t respond...mainly because she doesn’t know how to screen shot...and then she reported that the pic timed out and she lost it. With a bunch of crying faces.
> 
> And I said that’s because you’re not supposed to screen shot that stuff you perv! We both laughed and signed off. But she said she is gonna practice so she can catch one next time.
> 
> Hilarious!


----------



## Faithful Wife

AandM said:


> Yeah, the ****-pic thing is something I've not understood.
> 
> Maybe, if its just big enough, a woman will go, "Arrggh! I must be speared by the white whale (no racist}.
> 
> Otherwise, why the **** would a woman respond to pictures of a flabby fat ass who is MySpace-angling his **** as his selfie.
> 
> 
> 
> Faithful Wife said:
> 
> 
> 
> I’m just extremely goofy and have a whole penis schtick going on here. Thank you for playing along.
> 
> Random side note...
> 
> A friend of mine who is recently single is dipping her toes in some online adventures and she has not done this before during the smart phone age.
> 
> So she has so far had a few guys hinting about sending **** pics, which she knew to expect. But it still kind of shocked her.
> 
> I told her that it seemed to me that at least 85% of men are **** exhibitionists, and they want to send it to you so badly that it’s just hysterical, really.
> 
> I’ve shared with her my mad **** pic adventures over the past couple of years (she was married then) so she was aware. But you still just don’t really get how common it is until it happens to you. You think everyone is exaggerating. We aren’t.
> 
> I’ve gotten to the point where I make bets with myself about how long it will take with this guy.
> 
> Many don’t do it, and you can tell who they are. They are a nice refreshing blast of class.
> 
> But I’m not saying it’s always unwelcome either. Even if I’m never gonna meet a guy (or especially, in some cases) I may be curious enough to glance at it. I haven’t ever really been sorry. Hee!
> 
> Anyway, girl friend texted me tonight “how do I screen shot! I just got my first **** pic!”
> 
> Ha ha! I was laughing so hard I couldn’t respond...mainly because she doesn’t know how to screen shot...and then she reported that the pic timed out and she lost it. With a bunch of crying faces.
> 
> And I said that’s because you’re not supposed to screen shot that stuff you perv! We both laughed and signed off. But she said she is gonna practice so she can catch one next time.
> 
> Hilarious!
Click to expand...

Ok well first off, we know to ask for another angle. Just to make sure.

(That was a joke)

I honestly have to guess you are right. Somehow in their minds, you will be so impressed by it that you will demand they come take you by storm immediately. Ha ha!

But so many of them! Soooooooo many. Why? Why so many??!

I am actually not complaining. It’s just sort of a puzzle about man kind in this day and age. Also I’ve heard from lots of men that lots of women do it too, send unsolicited nudes. Boobs, poon, ass, whatever. Lots of guys say it the same, like these women are practically begging to let them send the pics. Some guys are also turned off by this and I’ve had guy friends tell me a woman just made him change his mind because she was too loose and quick with the pics.


----------



## [email protected]

I like the female form as much as any man. But I don't want to see certain membranes. She may be the most beautiful woman in the world, but I don't want to see her rectum.


----------



## ConanHub

[email protected] said:


> I like the female form as much as any man. But I don't want to see certain membranes. She may be the most beautiful woman in the world, but I don't want to see her rectum.


???????

This one totally lost me....


----------



## MAJDEATH

"I don't mind if you sit and play videogames all night."


----------



## ConanHub

MAJDEATH said:


> "I don't mind if you sit and play videogames all night."


Hahaha! Mrs. C never minced words about that.:grin2:


----------



## Kitty08

The number of sexual partners you've had.... 

Sent from my SM-G960U using Tapatalk


----------



## Andy1001

“You know what we should do”. Translation = I want to..........


----------



## MAJDEATH

"You've got the biggest one I've ever seen."

"I never had an orgasm until I met you."


----------



## MAJDEATH

I'll be ready in 30 minutes.


----------



## 2ntnuf

Yes, you're the father. I know because of when I got my infrequent total random period. 


This time, and only this time, it was regular. Hadn't been regular since I started, but this last 28 days was perfect. 



"Uuuhh Huh".


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## TheDudeLebowski

"You're a real piece of **** you know that?"


Obviously a lie. I know for a fact I'm a human, not a piece of ****.


----------

