# Husband Cyber cheating on Skout



## Italiana (Jul 20, 2016)

We are in our early 40s. First marriage for husband, second for me.

I am very much in love, he says he is too. We have been married a year. I am high drive he is very low drive, but flirty. 

About 6 months ago I rolled over late at night and saw him texting/chatting I thought, and got a weird vibe. I couldn't sleep well the rest of the night. I'm not someone who can let things just eat away at me, so the next morning I said, "Last night I though I saw you texting or online chatting. Were you?" He said no, he was sending a reply back to one of his employees. I said I was sorry to have asked, but that I couldn't let that stew.

Some time passes, and something similar happens. This time, he tells me he was chatting with two people on FB. Two women. He says the convos were innocent. I ask to see them, and he said he had deleted them. He promises me that nothing sexual was said, but that he knew I would be upset because he was chatting with them. He was right, I was upset, and he promised he would never do it again.

A little more time goes by. He goes to something a show with his mom, so I am home alone. I open his iPad, and it was like opening Pandora's box. Come to find out he had all kinds of accounts, including dating sites etc. His main poison was Skout. (I had never heard of it). I didn't find that one in my exploration. Turns out the FB story he told me was a lie, it was actually Skout I had caught him on that time also.

He comes home from the show with his mom and I say, "Do you want to be honest and tell me what's going on?" He says nothing is going on, that he doesn't know what I mean. I say I'm gonna give you one more chance to tell me yourself what is going on. Still nothing. So I hand the coward a printout of just some of the stuff I found. He tells me, "it's much worse than that." He tells me about Skout. I ask him to sign in there and let me see. He does.

It is hundreds, if not thousands of women he has been talking too. He brings the conversation around to sexual talk as quick as he can. A lot of the women send him pictures, nude etc. He even gives one his cell number. I go through the texts on his phone from this 18 year old lesbian that "has always wondered what it would be like to have a **** in her" and is sending him nudes of her and hr girlfriend. I go ape sh!t. Like into orbit. 

I am very close to his mom, and I made him call her the next day and have her come over. I let him explain to his mother what a low down dirty scumbag rat he is. She said she would have never believed it if it wasn't coming from his mouth.

Due to our living circumstances I am 100% sure nothing physical happened. That is some form of solace, but not much.

He grovels, promises, begs etc. He cries, gets depressed, even mentions suicide quite a bit. I feel serious consequences are in order for his cyber cheating. I stopped sleeping in our room. Take off my wedding ring and took down our wedding pictures. Told him I needed time to decide if I was going to stay or not.

He supposedly stopped. (This I believe). We slowly start to rebuild. Trust very slowly starts to come back. The months go on by, and I feel we have made it through that rough patch.

Last night while staying at a hotel, I roll over, and see he is still awake watching tv at 2 am. I mumbled something to him, and I close my eyes. But I open them again and see his phone fly up from having been hidden at his side when I had rolled over. He is typing as fast as possible. 

I say, "what are you doing!!!???"

He looks at me horrified, and says, "the same thing".

I say "give me your phone."

He is back on Skout. I read the same BS he is writing again to a bunch of women. He tells me this is the first time he has been on it since it since it all hit the fan months back and that he is just so stupid, and when he couldn't sleep he opened an account and started chatting. I look and see that part is true, he had just opened the account within the last two hours. I am LIVID. 

He is crying and begging and pleading again. Promising and vowing etc. I tell him, his words are meaningless, his promises worthless. That he is nothing but a lying cheat. I try to understand what he gets from this? He says he thinks its acceptance. He says he sends out a hundred hellos and gets so excited to see how many replies he gets. I asked him if he had done this in his past relationships? He says this happened with his long term girlfriend before me, and she caught him too, but he didn't stop. Just like he hasn't stopped now. I am heartbroken, angry and so incredibly sad.

I told him this is what I feel like my choices are:

1. Leave.
2. Stay and accept that he is always going to chat with women online.

I asked him what he would do if he were me? He says "I would leave my ass."

So he has a definite pattern. Listening to him, it is almost like an addiction. I have zero interest in policing his online sh!t. Either I can trust him, or I can't. Right now, I can't. No clue if I ever can?

I know I will get slammed for this, but the main reason I didn't immediately have him leave or me leave is because my kids have just finally settled in to having a stepdad and living in a new town etc. To displace them again so soon would be very, very bad, especially for my youngest. If the end decision is for him and I to split, so be it, and all will be known then and we will make due with what we must. I am not one to make huge decisions hastily, so I am taking some time to make this decision. The kids know we are dealing with a problem, but I keep them out of it. 

My questions I would like your opinions or insight on are:

1.) Can he stop?
2.) Am I overreacting?
3.) Is this a big deal or not?
4.) Have any of you been through this? Would you care to share how you handled it and the results?
5.) Since nothing physical has happened, (yes I'm 100% sure) and none of the conversations were consistently with the same person (just random women, him saying all the same stuff a million times over) should I be viewing this another way?

All I want, is for him to never do this again. If he can stop, then I can find it in my heart to forgive him again. I don't want to end my marriage, but I will if need be.

Thanks for reading.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

You are not overreacting.

He wants you to get over it, yet he would "leave your ass" should you do the same.

So, he holds you to a higher level of behaviour than he does himself?

That's not good.

He hasn't cheated on your physically? _I am sorry to point this out but you cannot play Russian Roulette with your health. You need STD tests to protect your health._

Besides which STD tests show him how deeply he has wounded you.

He needs therapy to help him stop doing this.

What do you want to happen?


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

He is certainlty addicted. He need both to join a 12 step program such as sex addicts anonymous (SAA) and get individual counseling. He won't stop on his own. He can't stop on his own. 

You will get posts that you should leave him. You choice to stay is yours and do not feel guilty. 

He hid the addiction but did probably did tell you the truth. 

He needs therapy to understand his need for attention.


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## Italiana (Jul 20, 2016)

MattMatt said:


> You are not overreacting.
> 
> He wants you to get over it, yet he would "leave your ass" should you do the same.
> 
> ...


Like I said, 100% sure this was only online, so I won't be getting a STD test, but if I had ANY doubt on that, I would. So correct, the cheating hasn't been physical. 

I agree with the therapy. He has already said he wants to go. What kind? We live in a small area.

What I want is him to stop, and never do it again.


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## Italiana (Jul 20, 2016)

blueinbr said:


> He is certainlty addicted. He need both to join a 12 step program such as sex addicts anonymous (SAA) and get individual counseling. He won't stop on his own. He can't stop on his own.
> 
> You will get posts that you should leave him. You choice to stay is yours and do not feel guilty.
> 
> ...


Thank you. We are in a very small area, but I will see if there is a SAA here.


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## farsidejunky (Mar 19, 2014)

Italiana said:


> Like I said, 100% sure this was only online, so I won't be getting a STD test, but if I had ANY doubt on that, I would. So correct, the cheating hasn't been physical.
> 
> I agree with the therapy. He has already said he wants to go. What kind? We live in a small area.
> 
> What I want is him to stop, and never do it again.


You can't control his behavior. Only he can.

What you can do is enforce a boundary, which states what you will do eg. you will not remain married to someone who chats with other women. Then he has a choice to not do it, or do it and you leave him behind as a consequence to crossing your boundary.

It really should be the latter. One year into a marriage should still be in the honeymoon phase. 

Sorry you are here.


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## notmyrealname4 (Apr 9, 2014)

.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Italiana said:


> Like I said, 100% sure this was only online, so I won't be getting a STD test, but if I had ANY doubt on that, I would. So correct, the cheating hasn't been physical.
> 
> I agree with the therapy. He has already said he wants to go. What kind? We live in a small area.
> 
> What I want is him to stop, and never do it again.


In such cases as yours you get the STD test to show to your WS (Wayward Spouse) how much they have hurt you and how badly they have let you down and how they have damaged your trust in them. Not to actually get tested for an STD.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

He was probably so into dating sites that he had no time for a real relationship then the woman of his dreams arrives in his life, he marries her, he stops the dating sites, but then he thinks: "A peek can't hurt" but of course, it does.


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## TAMAT (Jun 20, 2015)

Italiana,

You need to gather up whatever evidence you have, save it off in a safe place.

Then expose your WH to his family and whomever matters to him. 

There has to be consequences to his cheating.

He is only LD because his energy is going elsewhere. He was likely HD when you first met.

Tamat


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## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

He has an addiction for which he must get help. Give him a deadline to become a recovering addict and see what happens , but do not trust him so readily again until real progress has been made. Is he remorseful or sorry he got caught?


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## niceguy28 (May 6, 2016)

The biggest issue here is the deceit and the lies. To me that would be the deal breaker. One thing that you need to keep in mind OP is that this isn't about other women for him. This is an addiction. It's just like him being addicted to drugs or alcohol. You said he's low drive but he really isn't. It's just that his drive has been consumed by what he's doing online. My guess is that he started looking at porn a lot first and then it escalated to this. His brain has been rewired to crave what he's doing. This has absolutely nothing to do with you or any lack of feelings for you. Your husband probably views these women as nothing more than human sex toys that he can get off to. This is not like a typical affair. It's bad but not the same. If you love him and don't want to leave then I think you should insist that he get some sort of addiction counseling. Now personally I think telling his mom was a low blow but to each there own. By doing what you did you actually hurt her too when she had nothing to do with this.


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

OMG your story has so many parallels to mine.

To answer your questions:
1.) Can he stop? *definitely*
2.) Am I overreacting? *absolutely NOT*
3.) Is this a big deal or not? *it's a HUGE deal*
4.) Have any of you been through this? *yes* Would you care to share how you handled it and the results? *you can read my story through the link in my signature but I will elaborate as things come to mind*
5.) Since nothing physical has happened, (yes I'm 100% sure) and none of the conversations were consistently with the same person (just random women, him saying all the same stuff a million times over) should I be viewing this another way? *another way? not sure what you mean*

You have been cheated on. No matter that nothing physical happened. And by the way, please don't be so sure about that. I was. Anyway, start here

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/430739-post1.html

There is a TON of info in that post - take some time to digest it, and DO NOT discount it just because you don't think things went physical.


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

He absolutely HAS to see a CSAT

https://www.iitap.com/therapists-search/

He also needs to look into a 12 step group. There are several for sex addicts, each with a different philosophy.

12 Step Porn Addiction Groups ? What are the differences?

My husband attends SA


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

BTW - physical cheating can mean more than just PIV sex. My husband went to a hotel bar to meet up with one of his 'models'. She didn't actually exist, so he never went up to her room, but that act was cheating. No doubt about it


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## lucy999 (Sep 28, 2014)

Italiana said:


> I asked him what he would do if he were me? He says "I would leave my ass."
> 
> I know I will get slammed for this, but the main reason I didn't immediately have him leave or me leave is because my kids have just finally settled in to having a stepdad and living in a new town etc. To displace them again so soon would be very, very bad, especially for my youngest.
> 
> ...


I'm so sorry this is happening to you and your family.

His response to your question above would tell me everything I needed to know, frankly. 

RE: the children. If you were to leave, yes, it'd be a huge upheaval for the kids. For everyone. But think of it this way: if you decided to stay, your kids would further bond with him. He may not be able to stop and you might decide to leave at a later time. Where will you and the kids be then? They'd have developed this strong bond with your H and to uproot them at a later date seems much worse to me. 

1) He might be able to stop-with some professional help. On his own? Not likely.

2) You are not overreacting in the least. I'd be heartbroken.

3) I would view it exactly as you do-it's cheating. To me, it doesn't matter if it's physical or not. The fact that your H is making sexual advances to other women and devoting his time to other women, when he could be doing that with you, is cheating.

Also, the fact that he did it in his previous relationship doesn't bode well for your relationship now.

But overall, his response to your question would tell me everything and I'd pack it in.


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## veganmermaid (Jun 17, 2016)

He needs to be evaluated by a CSAT. This sounds very compulsive and bears some hallmarks of an addiction. That's not an excuse, btw - quite the opposite. Every message he sent was a choice he made to chase the cheap high at your expense.

While he seeks and is evaluated and treated by a CSAT, you take your time coming to a decision and then taking action. I'd suggest implementing the 180.

I'm so sorry you find yourself in this position.

Sent from my VS986 using Tapatalk


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## Evinrude58 (Jun 16, 2014)

Can he stop?
I doubt it. He hasn't. He will likely always have urges to do this and they are hard to control for an indiscipline a person.

I really think from what you say, that he wishes he wasn't addicted, but craves the high so badly, he dieSnt want to. 

He is just a plain old addict. 

You have to decide whether you can live with this kind of addiction, attempt to help him break the addiction, or just leave him.

You've already given him a chance and he failed. I hate that this is so pervasive in our society now.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## lonelyhusband321 (Feb 18, 2014)

farsidejunky said:


> You can't control his behavior. Only he can.
> 
> *What you can do is enforce a boundary, which states what you will do eg. you will not remain married to someone who chats with other women. Then he has a choice to not do it, or do it and you leave him behind as a consequence to crossing your boundary.*
> 
> ...


Farside hit it out of the park!

If you set boundaries and HE steps over them, it is HE who is ending it.

I had a situation that bore resemblances to yoursad it ultimately wound up in a D.

Yu must not


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## Italiana (Jul 20, 2016)

TAMAT said:


> Italiana,
> 
> You need to gather up whatever evidence you have, save it off in a safe place.
> 
> ...


Thank you for the advice everyone and I am sorry for the delay in replying, trying to deal with the fallout here has had me occupied. Let me supply the answers to all of your questions as I would greatly appreciate your continued advice on my behalf.

I had him expose it all to his mom the first time. I also brought her up to date this time, and she has spent many hours with him since. He also confessed all to his brother. I did not ask him to do that, and he didn't tell me he had...my brother in law later asked me how I was and said he would always be here if I need to talk. That's the only reason I found out he had told his big brother. 

I thought that was a pretty good sign. He said he asked him to help him stay on the right path. The family is all freaking out because they love me, and I love them, (VERY much) and they know what a good match my H and I are, and they think (and tell him loudly) what a total idiot he is being and that he needs to get his head out of his a$$.

I wish he had been HD...he never has been, sounds like his whole life. I love him for all that he is outside the bedroom.


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## Italiana (Jul 20, 2016)

aine said:


> He has an addiction for which he must get help. Give him a deadline to become a recovering addict and see what happens , but do not trust him so readily again until real progress has been made. Is he remorseful or sorry he got caught?


Thank you, great advice.

He is so massively remorseful. Torn to the heart. Disgusted with himself.


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## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

Italiana said:


> Thank you for the advice everyone and I am sorry for the delay in replying, trying to deal with the fallout here has had me occupied. Let me supply the answers to all of your questions as I would greatly appreciate your continued advice on my behalf.
> 
> I had him expose it all to his mom the first time. I also brought her up to date this time, and she has spent many hours with him since. He also confessed all to his brother. I did not ask him to do that, and he didn't tell me he had...my brother in law later asked me how I was and said he would always be here if I need to talk. That's the only reason I found out he had told his big brother.
> 
> ...


He is NOT 'a total idiot", this portrays him as some teenager who made a mistake and should be slapped on the wrist, do not let them minimise this, this is serious and you should take it seriously, even if his family by what they are saying are downplaying it.


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## Italiana (Jul 20, 2016)

aine said:


> He is NOT 'a total idiot", this portrays him as some teenager who made a mistake and should be slapped on the wrist, do not let them minimise this, this is serious and you should take it seriously, even if his family by what they are saying are downplaying it.


Trust me, none of us is taking it lightly. His family is far from minimizing. They have spent countless hours talking to him about it, now that it is out in the open. He makes zero excuses, and he owns it completly. In addition, they have clearly said they are 100% behind me.
His brother flat out said, "If it was me, I would leave his a$$. Whatever you decide the family is here to support YOU."

I haven't forgiven him as of yet, still don't know if I can.
My wedding ring is off, and all the pictures from our wedding are down.
I'm not messing around with this. He has deeply wounded and betrayed me.

He knows he is on trial for his life with me. 
His actions and decisions will determine his permenant sentence.
If s!uts on the Internet are his choice, it's over. 
If he stops, we can possibly reconcile someday.
That's where I am at right now...


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## Italiana (Jul 20, 2016)

niceguy28 said:


> The biggest issue here is the deceit and the lies. To me that would be the deal breaker. One thing that you need to keep in mind OP is that this isn't about other women for him. This is an addiction. It's just like him being addicted to drugs or alcohol. You said he's low drive but he really isn't. It's just that his drive has been consumed by what he's doing online. My guess is that he started looking at porn a lot first and then it escalated to this. His brain has been rewired to crave what he's doing. This has absolutely nothing to do with you or any lack of feelings for you. Your husband probably views these women as nothing more than human sex toys that he can get off to. This is not like a typical affair. It's bad but not the same. If you love him and don't want to leave then I think you should insist that he get some sort of addiction counseling. Now personally I think telling his mom was a low blow but to each there own. By doing what you did you actually hurt her too when she had nothing to do with this.


You post is great. I agree with you SO much. I think what you described hit the nail on the head as to what happened. The only thing I don't get is he said he has never got off while doing this, he said he doesn't even get a b0ner...that confuses me. Why bother? I guess I don't understand the addiction. 

I also see your side of it with telling his mom. I have always been a firm believer in not exposing your spouses faults to others. I suggested that he tell his mom for multiple reasons:

1. I cannot hide my emotions, they are written all over my face. As we spend so much time with her, there would be no way to hide my rejection of him. I would have been barraged with questions, and she wasn't gonna hear this from my lips. 

2. He needed the consequences. 

3. In my first marriage, I kept all our problems a secret from our families. I didn't have close dealings with them constantly like I do with my new in laws. I believe had I asked for help sooner, we may have been able to work it out. After the fact everyone said, "Why didn't you tell us what was going on? Why didn't you ask us for help?" I am ultimately such a private person. This is a huge challenge for me to share stuff so private. It goes against all my feelings on the matter.


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## Italiana (Jul 20, 2016)

I read everything you wrote and suggested me to read. Wow, the similarities are scary. At the same time, you give me hope. Thank you SO much for the reply and info. All of you that pay it forward helps all of us.



Hope1964 said:


> OMG your story has so many parallels to mine.
> 
> To answer your questions:
> 1.) Can he stop? *definitely*
> ...


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## Italiana (Jul 20, 2016)

It really is, it is epidemic. 

I can't live with it. I know I don't have the ability to stay with a cheater. I just hope that he gets all the help he can to stop and that we can at some point heal, but this is out of my hands, he has to do all the work.




Evinrude58 said:


> Can he stop?
> I doubt it. He hasn't. He will likely always have urges to do this and they are hard to control for an indiscipline a person.
> 
> I really think from what you say, that he wishes he wasn't addicted, but craves the high so badly, he dieSnt want to.
> ...


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## Evinrude58 (Jun 16, 2014)

He is LD but watches porn all the time and doesn't even get aroused?

I'll have to call foul on that. If it didn't arouse him, it wouldn't be addicting(just my opinion, I could be wrong).

I don't even see how he could be LD and a porn addict, but one learns something new every day.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Italiana said:


> Like I said, 100% sure this was only online, so I won't be getting a STD test, but if I had ANY doubt on that, I would. So correct, the cheating hasn't been physical.
> 
> I agree with the therapy. He has already said he wants to go. What kind? We live in a small area.
> 
> What I want is him to stop, and never do it again.


Does your husband have a job? Of does he sit at home all day with you?


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Evinrude58 said:


> He is LD but watches porn all the time and doesn't even get aroused?
> 
> I'll have to call foul on that. If it didn't arouse him, it wouldn't be addicting(just my opinion, I could be wrong).
> 
> I don't even see how he could be LD and a porn addict, but one learns something new every day.


Most likely he is not LD. Instead he just does not want a lot of sex with his wife. Instead he finds his on-line activities more sexually stimulating than real-life sex. A fair number of men get this way with online porn and/or sexting. 

He's LD for his wife. HD in reality.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Italiana said:


> You post is great. I agree with you SO much. I think what you described hit the nail on the head as to what happened. The only thing I don't get is he said he has never got off while doing this, he said he doesn't even get a b0ner...that confuses me. Why bother? I guess I don't understand the addiction.


He’s not telling you the truth. He’s getting a b0ner but it’s something that is easy to lie about. He might not have a boner every moment that he’s online with these women, but he’s getting them and getting off. The point of this kind of activity is that it keeps a person at a high level of sexual stimulation for a long time. It causes the brain to produce and up take large amounts of feel good hormones, like dopamine. It’s a lot of a cocaine addiction since cocaine also increases dopamine. 

A lot of the chatting with the women is a kind of ‘hunt’ or pursuit for sexual gratification. The anticipation heightens the experience once he does get to the point of sexting and/or using porn to jack off. Here is a site that has a good discussion on the topic. While the site talks mostly about online porn, people who do what your husband is doing use the online chats and sexting as more of an interactive form of porn.

Your Brain On Porn | Evolution has not prepared your brain for today's Internet porn

I was married to a guy who did what your husband is doing. Except that he was also HD in the bedroom. But he was pursuing women online and using porn on the side as well. 

I too thought that it was all ‘just’ online. Until I found out that it was not. People who do this often find time to meet their online flirts. Even a quick lunch break is enough time. Or a trip to the store works too.

In the end he could not stop. It takes a lot of help from the right kind of sex therapist to be able to kick this kind of habit/addiction.

This is his problem, not yours. It’s doubtful that he would ever give it.


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## farsidejunky (Mar 19, 2014)

EleGirl said:


> Most likely he is not LD. Instead he just does not want a lot of sex with his wife. Instead he finds his on-line activities more sexually stimulating than real-life sex. A fair number of men get this way with online porn and/or sexting.
> 
> He's LD for his wife. HD in reality.


This. 

His sexual energy is being given to pixels of real life women, not you.


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## rileyawes (Jun 28, 2016)

EleGirl said:


> He’s not telling you the truth. He’s getting a b0ner but it’s something that is easy to lie about. He might not have a boner every moment that he’s online with these women, but he’s getting them and getting off. The point of this kind of activity is that it keeps a person at a high level of sexual stimulation for a long time. It causes the brain to produce and up take large amounts of feel good hormones, like dopamine. It’s a lot of a cocaine addiction since cocaine also increases dopamine.
> 
> A lot of the chatting with the women is a kind of ‘hunt’ or pursuit for sexual gratification. The anticipation heightens the experience once he does get to the point of sexting and/or using porn to jack off. Here is a site that has a good discussion on the topic. While the site talks mostly about online porn, people who do what your husband is doing use the online chats and sexting as more of an interactive form of porn.
> 
> ...


How long did it take you to leave the marriage and what did you do? Did he ever get better?


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## Spicy (Jun 18, 2016)

Evinrude58 said:


> He is LD but watches porn all the time and doesn't even get aroused?
> 
> I'll have to call foul on that. If it didn't arouse him, it wouldn't be addicting(just my opinion, I could be wrong).
> 
> ...


Not that there is much of a difference, but it isn't porn he is watching, he is chatting with women on a social website. Dirty chatting.


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## Spicy (Jun 18, 2016)

Unless I misunderstood...


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Spicy said:


> Not that there is much of a difference, but it isn't porn he is watching, he is chatting with women on a social website. Dirty chatting.


What I learned with my ex is that dirty-chatting/sexting is actually a form of "porn". Basically interactive porn-like. I put a key log tracker on his computer and got the texts of dozens of his sexting sessions. It can actually be far more stimulating than watching porn because it requires that the imagination be used to fill in the visual. It's very seductive. This is why people get hooked on it.

My bet is that the OP is not aware of everything that her husband has been doing. He is probably also using porn.


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## Italiana (Jul 20, 2016)

EleGirl said:


> What I learned with my ex is that dirty-chatting/sexting is actually a form of "porn". Basically interactive porn-like. I put a key log tracker on his computer and got the texts of dozens of his sexting sessions. It can actually be far more stimulating than watching porn because it requires that the imagination be used to fill in the visual. It's very seductive. This is why people get hooked on it.
> 
> My bet is that the OP is not aware of everything that her husband has been doing. He is probably also using porn.


I think everything you have posted has been DEAD ON @EleGirl!

I need to learn how to get anything he is sexting on his phone in these chatrooms. If anyone knows how, please advise. He has android, I'm an Apple girl.


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

There might be something in this thread. If not, try PMing the OP or another person who sounds like they know what they're talking about

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/coping...ted-evidence-gathering-thread.html#post886718


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## She'sStillGotIt (Jul 30, 2016)

Italiana said:


> Due to our living circumstances I am 100% sure nothing physical happened. That is some form of solace, but not much.


Sorry, but unless you're co-joined physically at the hip, you can't be 100% sure of ANYTHING where this guy is concerned.


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## Italiana (Jul 20, 2016)

She'sStillGotIt said:


> Sorry, but unless you're co-joined physically at the hip, you can't be 100% sure of ANYTHING where this guy is concerned.


Yes, if he goes out physically during the 7 hours we have set aside to sleep at night, it could be happening. Anything is possible.


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## veganmermaid (Jun 17, 2016)

cheaterthrowaway said:


> There's no such thing as _"cyber cheating"_. By definition cheating is bumping uglies. No wonder he's talking to other women. If I was married to such a prude I'd want to hang myself.


Thanks for sharing your opinion, but it is just that - your opinion. The diversion of attention, focus, time, etc from the marriage to the online activities described in the OP absolutely constitutes infidelity.

And there's no basis - at all - for calling the betrayed wife a prude.

Sent from my VS986 using Tapatalk


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## Spicy (Jun 18, 2016)

Originally Posted by cheaterthrowaway:
"There's no such thing as "cyber cheating". By definition cheating is bumping uglies. No wonder he's talking to other women. If I was married to such a prude I'd want to hang myself."


What the freak is this reply???!!! Are you for real or do you live under a bridge? A gem such as yourself must just have the ladies lining up, huh? Scurry back to wherever you came from, we are trying to help each other here.


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