# Crazy or Drama Queen



## plomito (Apr 7, 2015)

Hello, 

This happened to me recently and I wanted to get a second opinion. After a nice time out with a lady friend, we decided to stop by a local bar and get something to eat and have few drinks. After the first drink, I noticed she was a little sad and acting weird. I asked her if she was ok, which she replied she was feeling some type of way because I didn’t make any comment on what had happened earlier. I told her of course I enjoyed it, and I was happy that she did as well…but that’s when everything turned for the worst. She started to cry and talk how I don’t understand her feelings and how she feels some way and she is frustrated because she cannot explain it. She then started to tell me how she doesn’t like to be second, which I replied “are you ok, you know I’m not seeing anybody else” but after that answer she just started to cry more. At this point I’m embarrassed at the bar, and I can feel others looking at us. I tried to calm her down, but honestly I was shocked out of my pants, like what in the world just happened here??? After she calmed down, she started to mention how she was feeling a little emotional and to not pay her mind, but honestly at this point I really don’t know what to think.
I honestly don’t ever want to see this chick again, I feel this is just the warning of problems to come if I continue, but again I would like to see what others think.


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## SunnyT (Jun 22, 2011)

Too weird. Don't blame ya if you don't want to take on a crier. 

Was it a drunk/stupid thing?

PMS? 

Did she say anything about it the next day? I mean, it'd have to be something REALLY sad like my grama just died to make me cry on a date. I'd be mortified. 

How long have you been dating? Is there any other weirdness? 

Really, even if she felt slighted (real or not) by something you said or did....you don't break down crying on a date! 

Maybe she has something else in her life going on....but even then she shouldn't put it on you, she'd have to be mature and honest about what her problem is. 

With all that said, I vote break it off. Let this one go.


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## ThreeStrikes (Aug 11, 2012)

Warning sign of things to come.

Run, Forrest, run!


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## Sun Catcher (Dec 6, 2013)

Run Forrest run is the right answer. Way too weird, whether the first or subsequent date. Had she had too much to drink? Still, a woman needs to be able to control herself. 

Next!


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## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

Could be she's crazy. Could be she's a drama queen. My question to you is: Why do you care? 

Seriously, this woman did something on a date that you found embarrassing and unacceptable. Why wouldn't you just politely decline to see her again and move on?


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## plomito (Apr 7, 2015)

Hey Fellas, 

I can't say I don't care, because we are friends and we had our good laughs and good time, but I was shocked to see this side. I guess she did had maybe too much to drink or have problem controlling her emotions. I do agree with everybody so far, this is a sign that I need to run before things get worse, because honestly to see a person transition from being happy and the next second is crying and talking stuff that doesn't make sense, is pretty scary.


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## plomito (Apr 7, 2015)

Yes, I actually not looking forward to hang with her. God only knows what can happen next time




Rowan said:


> Could be she's crazy. Could be she's a drama queen. My question to you is: Why do you care?
> 
> Seriously, this woman did something on a date that you found embarrassing and unacceptable. Why wouldn't you just politely decline to see her again and move on?


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## dash74 (Jan 3, 2015)

plomito said:


> Hello,
> 
> This happened to me recently and I wanted to get a second opinion. After a nice time out with a lady friend, we decided to stop by a local bar and get something to eat and have few drinks. After the first drink, I noticed she was a little sad and acting weird. I asked her if she was ok, which she replied she was feeling some type of way because I didn’t make any comment on what had happened earlier. I told her of course I enjoyed it, and I was happy that she did as well…but that’s when everything turned for the worst. She started to cry and talk how I don’t understand her feelings and how she feels some way and she is frustrated because she cannot explain it. She then started to tell me how she doesn’t like to be second, which I replied “are you ok, you know I’m not seeing anybody else” but after that answer she just started to cry more. At this point I’m embarrassed at the bar, and I can feel others looking at us. I tried to calm her down, but honestly I was shocked out of my pants, like what in the world just happened here??? After she calmed down, she started to mention how she was feeling a little emotional and to not pay her mind, but honestly at this point I really don’t know what to think.
> I honestly don’t ever want to see this chick again, I feel this is just the warning of problems to come if I continue, but again I would like to see what others think.


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## Lostinthought61 (Nov 5, 2013)

Don't you wish that people who are mentally unstable at times, wear medical alert bracelets, that warned you not to mix alcohol and pills. My money is on crazy


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## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

plomito said:


> Hello,
> 
> This happened to me recently and I wanted to get a second opinion. After a nice time out with a lady friend, we decided to stop by a local bar and get something to eat and have few drinks. After the first drink, I noticed she was a little sad and acting weird. I asked her if she was ok, which she replied she was feeling some type of way because I didn’t make any comment on what had happened earlier. I told her of course I enjoyed it, and I was happy that she did as well…but that’s when everything turned for the worst. She started to cry and talk how I don’t understand her feelings and how she feels some way and she is frustrated because she cannot explain it. She then started to tell me how she doesn’t like to be second, which I replied “are you ok, you know I’m not seeing anybody else” but after that answer she just started to cry more. At this point I’m embarrassed at the bar, and I can feel others looking at us. I tried to calm her down, but honestly I was shocked out of my pants, like what in the world just happened here??? After she calmed down, she started to mention how she was feeling a little emotional and to not pay her mind, but honestly at this point I really don’t know what to think.
> *I honestly don’t ever want to see this chick again, I feel this is just the warning of problems to come if I continue, but again I would like to see what others think.*


Guy your instincts are spot on here. You need this in your life like a whole the head. Run and never look back


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

plomito said:


> Hello,
> 
> This happened to me recently and I wanted to get a second opinion. After a nice time out with a lady friend, we decided to stop by a local bar and get something to eat and have few drinks. After the first drink, I noticed she was a little sad and acting weird. I asked her if she was ok, which she replied she was feeling some type of way because I didn’t make any comment on what had happened earlier. I told her of course I enjoyed it, and I was happy that she did as well…but that’s when everything turned for the worst. She started to cry and talk how I don’t understand her feelings and how she feels some way and she is frustrated because she cannot explain it. She then started to tell me how she doesn’t like to be second, which I replied “are you ok, you know I’m not seeing anybody else” but after that answer she just started to cry more. At this point I’m embarrassed at the bar, and I can feel others looking at us. I tried to calm her down, but honestly I was shocked out of my pants, like what in the world just happened here??? After she calmed down, she started to mention how she was feeling a little emotional and to not pay her mind, but honestly at this point I really don’t know what to think.
> I honestly don’t ever want to see this chick again, I feel this is just the warning of problems to come if I continue, but again I would like to see what others think.


Run, Forrest, Run!!


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## Apexmale (Jul 31, 2015)

Run like you stole something! Skip out on the bill and haul ass out of there as fast as possible! 

Once you reach relative safety, call the place and pay it with a card through a manager. 

Sent from Above


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## Blossom Leigh (Mar 27, 2014)

Yea, not good... cut this one loose to go heal on her own.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

At the very least.. if she was having an extraordinarily BAD DAY/ PMS overload ...you'd think she'd reach out feeling really awful about this ..apologizing for her behavior... trying to explain what in the world that was all about.. 

You said she is a Lady friend.. how well do you know her.. her history with relationships, what does your guy friends say ?

Anyone would be freaked out & want to run Forrest Run..she came off like you needed to "read her mind" & validate her every whim ...or she'll have a breakdown... and you JUST STARTED GOING OUT! Oh my!


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## Grogmiester (Nov 23, 2015)

plomito said:


> *After she calmed down, she started to mention how she was feeling a little emotional and to not pay her mind*, but honestly at this point I really don’t know what to think.
> 
> I chuckled when I read this post because if this would have happened to me when I was in my early 20's I would have been "wow she's really hurting, there must be something I can do to help, we can work it out, it will get better, I JUST KNOW IT" !
> 
> ...


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## plomito (Apr 7, 2015)

Yeah, today she reached out and was blaming it on some pills she is taking and how they giving her mood swings,but I started to back off slowly. I really don't need a crazy in my life 

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## plomito (Apr 7, 2015)

SimplyAmorous said:


> At the very least.. if she was having an extraordinarily BAD DAY/ PMS overload ...you'd think she'd reach out feeling really awful about this ..apologizing for her behavior... trying to explain what in the world that was all about..
> 
> You said she is a Lady friend.. how well do you know her.. her history with relationships, what does your guy friends say ?
> 
> Anyone would be freaked out & want to run Forrest Run..she came off like you needed to "read her mind" & validate her every whim ...or she'll have a breakdown... and you JUST STARTED GOING OUT! Oh my!


We have common friends and they always talk about how dramatic she is and exaggerate things.. I must say I should had listened but I didn't. But after this event I see that she is like that and prob can get worse... So like other had mentioned.. Time to run like Forrest 

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## NextTimeAround (Dec 15, 2011)

It seems that something else is going on in her life that she has not told you about. 

If you don't want that kind of close relationship in which personal issues / problems are discussed, that is your right.

And then she should keep those matters at home when out with you.

So yes, I agree with the others. If you decide to ignore her messages after this, you are within your social rights to do so,.


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## plomito (Apr 7, 2015)

NextTimeAround said:


> It seems that something else is going on in her life that she has not told you about.
> 
> If you don't want that kind of close relationship in which personal issues / problems are discussed, that is your right.
> 
> ...


Agree brother, I must say she have tried to get in touch but some of the stuff she says sometimes doesn't make sense

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## Voltaire2013 (Sep 22, 2013)

plomito said:


> Agree brother, I must say she have tried to get in touch but some of the stuff she says sometimes doesn't make sense
> 
> Sent from my SM-N920T using Tapatalk


Just sayin, crazy girl often = best sex ever. Balance you needs and your level of toleration. ;-)


Cheers,
V(13)


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## plomito (Apr 7, 2015)

Voltaire2013 said:


> Just sayin, crazy girl often = best sex ever. Balance you needs and your level of toleration. ;-)
> 
> 
> Cheers,
> V(13)


You hit the nail right on the head..sex is amazing but the headaches isn't worth it ..Is hard to be with s person that is so weird and say so many incoherent things sometimes.

She texted me asking me to go on lunch with her and I declined and then she have the nerves to asked me if I'm no longer love her...like wtf !!! Dude you don't get it ? I don't want to be around you neither with you .. I'm trying to avoid being rude to her but there is only so much I can tolerate.

Even today she sent a pic of her with her new hair style, and I just replied nicely and please do not send me pictures. 

I'm dealing with a crazy here...ayeee! 

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## Evinrude58 (Jun 16, 2014)

Taking pills? There's your answer right there. 

The great sex probably just isn't worth it__ as you've correctly deduced.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## plomito (Apr 7, 2015)

Evinrude58 said:


> Taking pills? There's your answer right there.
> 
> The great sex probably just isn't worth it__ as you've correctly deduced.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Nope isn't. I have to admit she does look great, but I don't have the time to deal with a crazy 

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## Voltaire2013 (Sep 22, 2013)

Ask for nudes, you deserve it as a consolation prize. ::grin2:

Kidding of course, she will send them, but your life will become a bigger hell after, ask me how I know. Move on.

Cheers,
V(13)


plomito said:


> You hit the nail right on the head..sex is amazing but the headaches isn't worth it ..Is hard to be with s person that is so weird and say so many incoherent things sometimes.
> 
> She texted me asking me to go on lunch with her and I declined and then she have the nerves to asked me if I'm no longer love her...like wtf !!! Dude you don't get it ? I don't want to be around you neither with you .. I'm trying to avoid being rude to her but there is only so much I can tolerate.
> 
> ...


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## plomito (Apr 7, 2015)

Voltaire2013 said:


> Ask for nudes, you deserve it as a consolation prize. ::grin2:
> 
> Kidding of course, she will send them, but your life will become a bigger hell after, ask me how I know. Move on.
> 
> ...


@votaire2013 how you know brother, share if you don't mind. First dealing with something like this 

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## Voltaire2013 (Sep 22, 2013)

plomito said:


> @votaire2013 how you know brother, share if you don't mind. First dealing with something like this
> 
> Sent from my SM-N920T using Tapatalk


First, I'm not knocking mental illness, I'm just laughing at my experience with it. Spend some time looking into 'BPD' posts here, I almost married a woman with it. Take a look at the results of men who did (& certainly it knows no gender, the men are just as much an issue)
She met me, became everything I desired, isolated me, made me question my judgement & myself and then became a miserable person to be around. Her own Mother offered me a 'dowry' (aka bribe) to take her problem off her hands. When the **** hit the fan and I had enough of her issues I asked her 'what happened to that happy girl that loved life that I feel in love with?' She stated calmly and with no sense of irony 'that was just an act to get you' 

I've never been so mad as a man, she made me stop spending time with my sister and made me feel guilty for it! That's straight up evil if you ask me. I learned, I laugh about it now, but Jesus she was good in the sack whe she was hooking me in. After I wasn't even a thought. 

Don't be a KISA. There are plenty of women who will love you right. My current wife and I Joke about who was abused more.? (Physical vs mental, we both flinch at times) but In a good way. We're somewhat healed. 


Cheers,
v(13)


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## 2ndchanceGuy (Sep 28, 2015)

OP , it sounds like both Crazy and Drama Queen. I guess they kind of go together.
Your gut is telling you to run you better ! It will take a really special person to put up with her. 
Most guys can't handle it. More than likely she has other guys that she keeps on the hook as well. ( a pattern I have seen that usually goes with hot and crazy ) ( have you heard of the hot/ crazy scale ? LOL ) 

Take my advice , be nice but cut her out and tell her you are moving on. I have a woman just like her that stalks me now. Its getting old


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## plomito (Apr 7, 2015)

Voltaire2013 said:


> First, I'm not knocking mental illness, I'm just laughing at my experience with it. Spend some time looking into 'BPD' posts here, I almost married a woman with it. Take a look at the results of men who did (& certainly it knows no gender, the men are just as much an issue)
> She met me, became everything I desired, isolated me, made me question my judgement & myself and then became a miserable person to be around. Her own Mother offered me a 'dowry' (aka bribe) to take her problem off her hands. When the **** hit the fan and I had enough of her issues I asked her 'what happened to that happy girl that loved life that I feel in love with?' She stated calmly and with no sense of irony 'that was just an act to get you'
> 
> I've never been so mad as a man, she made me stop spending time with my sister and made me feel guilty for it! That's straight up evil if you ask me. I learned, I laugh about it now, but Jesus she was good in the sack whe she was hooking me in. After I wasn't even a thought.
> ...


 @Voltaire2013 I was looking for the definitions. But I'm using my mobile...what's a kisa ? And thanks for sharing 

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## plomito (Apr 7, 2015)

2ndchanceGuy said:


> OP , it sounds like both Crazy and Drama Queen. I guess they kind of go together.
> Your gut is telling you to run you better ! It will take a really special person to put up with her.
> Most guys can't handle it. More than likely she has other guys that she keeps on the hook as well. ( a pattern I have seen that usually goes with hot and crazy ) ( have you heard of the hot/ crazy scale ? LOL )
> 
> Take my advice , be nice but cut her out and tell her you are moving on. I have a woman just like her that stalks me now. Its getting old


Yeah brother, I mean don't get me wrong she is nice as a person and very helpful but this side of her is what throw me off. 

After that episode we probably seen each other twice and is more like a hi and by type of thing, but still when she texts is like in her mind we have this relationship. Always trying to get me to do things with her. Is like she doesn't get it 

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## Adelais (Oct 23, 2013)

plomito said:


> I really don't need a crazy in my life
> 
> Sent from my SM-N920T using Tapatalk


Remind yourself of that when you begin to have sympathy for her. You can be her platonic acquaintance, but have no hopes for anything more. No more spending time or drinking together, just "hi" at the workplace and move along.


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

It doesn't matter.
The bottom line is that you can never go out with her or do anything that involves her again with any degree of certainty that this is not going to happen again.

If you have an established relationship and something like this behavior develops, then you have a chance of addressing it as a couple with a long history of working together and getting each other's backs.

But this early on in a relationship, why would you want to do that to yourself.

If you were friends before, for a long time, then by all means offer to take her to counseling and be supportive, but have limits. The idea is for her to get back on her feet and move on. You can help if you feel moved to, but don't feel obligated. Showing concern and expressing empathy and caring is enough, but if a person isn't interested in helping themselves, don't feel obligated. 

What happened to you was weird. A normal person would just tell you that she's not feeling well and needs to leave. And not create such a scene. Jeez, I was literally dying once in an upscale restaurant and refused to have an ambulance come, I got enough towels to not leave a trail of blood (very bad miscarriage scene in the bathroom, the Universe provided me an ER nurse in the next stall) through the dining room and the front door, and removed myself from the restaurant. This was a place where former President Bush dined... but still, not creating scenes is a very real and desirable social skill. It should be so engrained in a person that even when they are in the process of dying, they will refuse to embarrass their date, no matter what the relationship (I was with family, my husband and his brother and wife, and their daughter...) 

Just move on. This woman is not marriage material, what you take on as a friend is up to you.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

plomito said:


> Yeah, today she reached out and was blaming it on some pills she is taking and how they giving her mood swings,but I started to back off slowly. I really don't need a crazy in my life
> 
> Sent from my SM-N920T using Tapatalk


Do the pills say: "Warning. Do not consume alcohol whilst taking this medication?"


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## FeministInPink (Sep 13, 2012)

plomito said:


> You hit the nail right on the head..sex is amazing but the headaches isn't worth it ..Is hard to be with s person that is so weird and say so many incoherent things sometimes.
> 
> She texted me asking me to go on lunch with her and I declined and then she have the nerves to asked me if I'm no longer love her...like wtf !!! Dude you don't get it ? I don't want to be around you neither with you .. I'm trying to avoid being rude to her but there is only so much I can tolerate.
> 
> ...


Wait a minute... have you told her that you love her? How long have you been seeing her, and how serious is this relationship?

I'm smelling a strong "he called her crazy for having emotions that he didn't like and didn't want to deal with."

Because women are complicated and have emotions.

I need more info before I can vote crazy or nay.


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## plomito (Apr 7, 2015)

FeministInPink said:


> Wait a minute... have you told her that you love her? How long have you been seeing her, and how serious is this relationship?
> 
> I'm smelling a strong "he called her crazy for having emotions that he didn't like and didn't want to deal with."
> 
> ...


Well i know women have emotions, and i am ok with that, but imagine yourself at a public place talking to somebody and this person starts going through emotions (crying, smiling, putting her head between her arms) and during all this, you have no idea what in the world is going on. Like i mention we had spent time earlier and we just stopped to get some food and go on our separate ways, and all of the sudden she started to flip. 

The relationship isn't serious, we just hooked up recently and that was our first time out, and no i haven't told her i love her. That word is too strong.


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## FeministInPink (Sep 13, 2012)

plomito said:


> Well i know women have emotions, and i am ok with that, but imagine yourself at a public place talking to somebody and this person starts going through emotions (crying, smiling, putting her head between her arms) and during all this, you have no idea what in the world is going on. Like i mention we had spent time earlier and we just stopped to get some food and go on our separate ways, and all of the sudden she started to flip.
> 
> The relationship isn't serious, we just hooked up recently and that was our first time out, and no i haven't told her i love her. That word is too strong.


Thanks for the additional details. 

I concur with the masses and say crazy.


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## larry.gray (Feb 21, 2011)

How about both?

As I've learned more about cluster B personality disorders, I've observed that many who are "drama queens" share a litany of traits with histrionic and borderline personality disorder.


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## plomito (Apr 7, 2015)

larry.gray said:


> How about both?
> 
> As I've learned more about cluster B personality disorders, I've observed that many who are "drama queens" share a litany of traits with histrionic and borderline personality disorder.


And at first I thought she just wanted attention, but even after that day her conversations which I keep very limited makes you wonder "what the....." 

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## Tall (Feb 19, 2014)

Hope you have managed to disengage successfully.


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