# Reduction of child support



## Cheshire Cat (Jul 10, 2013)

Hi all,

First, my husband and I are not yet in R. We have been separated for almost 3 years now and we started talking about R in spring. There have been many ups and downs because my husband is still somewhat (or very?) wayward but things are getting better even though very slowly we are both still at the R table.

I filed for divorce in November /2011 but recently dropped it because our R talk got more serious. 

The latest development is, last Sunday, during a phone conversation he told me that he has a child support check for me. He got fired from his previous job in summer and the last payment (through CS collection agency) was deposited into my account in September.

With his new much less paying job the collection has not been set up and he calculated the amount of the check which is now almost a half of what it was before and told me that is all he could afford. (I haven't seen his pay stub)

In the meantime, his house is now in pending foreclosure and had to hire a lawyer to deal with it, but also paid (I don’t know how much) for this personal trainer certification course that he has been attending since September.

My initial thought was No way, until we physically move back in together, he has to keep giving me the same amount no questions asked.

But on the other hand, since we are in R talk, I feel that I should be understanding and be willing to work with him. The thing is, I want to set the move back in date. R won’t start until we physically live together and also I don’t want to go for indefinite period of time with just a half of CS money I used to receive.

What would you guys say? In a perfect world, we should move back in when all the issues are completely solved and we are both 100% ready but it’s also true that as far as we stay separated we won’t even get to real R.

Things are not looking too promising but I am not quite ready to walk away yet. Sometimes I wish I could just finalize the divorce and get out of this limbo. I am tired.

Any input will be greatly appreciated.


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