# When does "Head" knowledge become "Heart"?



## Limping (Oct 5, 2011)

This will be my first original post. I have replied a couple times, but not posted.

I had a question that frustrates me greatly and I thought you all might be able to shed some light on it for me.

I KNOW all the right things to do and what I need to do to get on with my life. I go to counseling and he tells me all the things I need to do etc. Things I already know. When will I actually start doing them?

I am not sure if I am making myself clear or not. Perhaps someone will recognize what I have written in their past and let me know how to get myself to actually do things I am suppose to.

Right now, I am spending 24/7 in various care taking tasks or situations for my girls. But, as my therapist says, I need to take care of myself. However, I do not have hobbies only 1 friend in the area and I have children that are hard to raise (past abuse issues etc.). I never seem to be able to focus on me. I even have to make others in my life happy because I depend on them so much. 

I would really like to tell everyone to go jump off a cliff but, that is not going to happen.

When do the platitudes become my attitude?

Bill


----------



## Shooboomafoo (Mar 30, 2011)

Give it time. Right now it seems you are doing well, by doing what your heart tells you is important. i.e. taking care of the kids. 
Your time will come. Perhaps there is an intrinsic value in caring for others, that you gain something from as it is. I myself, get a sense of value or worth from doing what I know is required in the parenting area, though largely it becomes very "service" oriented, knowing my kid is taken care of is valuable to me. I get a better sense of what I am or would like to be.

You gotta give yourself some room to feel though as well. Moving beyond things starts with approaching them. I have bouts of sadness about how all this went down, even though there is no option for reconciliation, and the sadness seems useless, it does have some healing qualities.


----------



## Sparkles422 (Jun 3, 2011)

limping:

Schedule 15 minutes to a half hour each day for yourself. You must have that much time. Do it and then do something relaxing since you're already so busy.

I don't know what your IC has advised but why don't you select one and do that instead of piling them altogether, much too overwhelming. One thing at a time, one day at a time. It works.

Good luck and be well.


----------

