# Small Town



## jinba (Apr 26, 2012)

We live in a very small town and occasionally I see the OW - it may be at a grocery store, Walmart, etc. - but each time the visuals of them together come back. I can't seem to get it out of my head - and she usually has this snotty smirk on her face. I just want to slap her up side the head. 

I doubt she even knows she wasn't the only one (she thinks she's pretty special) - so maybe I should be the one smirking? How do you let go of the hatred and forgive someone like that? She has no remorse - has told others she did nothing wrong - excuse me? Screwing someone elses husband isn't wrong? What world did this woman grow up in?


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

I can understand how hard this can be in a small town. For me, it was all the gossip which made life near impossible some days.

You should really put this sorry woman out of your mind. She's not worth it. However, your anger should be directed at your husband. He's the one who CHOSE to cheat.


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## iheartlife (Apr 4, 2012)

jinba said:


> We live in a very small town and occasionally I see the OW - it may be at a grocery store, Walmart, etc. - but each time the visuals of them together come back. I can't seem to get it out of my head - and she usually has this snotty smirk on her face. I just want to slap her up side the head.
> 
> I doubt she even knows she wasn't the only one (she thinks she's pretty special) - so maybe I should be the one smirking? How do you let go of the hatred and forgive someone like that? She has no remorse - has told others she did nothing wrong - excuse me? Screwing someone elses husband isn't wrong? What world did this woman grow up in?


It would be all I could do not to walk up to her and say, I hope you got a full slate of testing for STDs, because you weren't the only one.

And then turn on my heel and walk away.



But short of that, I would work on looking really, really bored. Not fakey D-actor high school play bored, just bored.

And I'd probably make sure I always had sunglasses on when walking around outside.


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

Have you thought about posting her to cheaterville? Her true nature being known around town and the world might take some on the smug off.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

Just walk over and kick her in the shins.


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## jinba (Apr 26, 2012)

Some good suggestions here - thanks! Don't know that I have the courage to do any of them, but it's definitely food for thought. I've never confronted her - feeling that what goes around comes around, and she'll get her just reward someday. 

I do have a lot of information that could cause her a lot of grief within our community - she's kind of a whack job - even threatened suicide when my H tried to dump her - and told him that if he didn't want her there were 4 other men in town who did - LOL - the dumb ass should have realized where he stood right then and there. I don't think she really gave a damn about him - it was the attention she craved - and the feeling that she was somehow better or more desirable than me or the other women whose men she was involved with.

Her husband knew about her involvement with mine, but I'm not sure how much he really knew. He's one of those hard fast and true Catholics who would never even consider divorcing her - which might be a good thing for the rest of us - if she's this bad when she's married, imagine how aweful she would be if she were single!!!


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## pidge70 (Jan 17, 2011)

If I had to see the OW out and about, I would probably beat the holy sh!t out of her. small town or not. Good for you for taking the high road.


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

Hold the presses. You haven't exposed to the OWH! You need to do that.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Eli-Zor (Nov 14, 2010)

Shaggy said:


> Hold the presses. You haven't exposed to the OWH! You need to do that.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Read that as well, it is never to late .
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## jinba (Apr 26, 2012)

I talked to him once about the situation - he was aware - but said he didn't think it was about the sex, stating he didn't even think she liked sex. 

As more information unfolded, I kept it to myself ... guess I didn't want him to feel the same pain I was going through. He knew about the affair - and I felt that was enough. If he wanted details, he should have confronted her.


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## Eli-Zor (Nov 14, 2010)

Sounds like her husband did not have all the information, send him the pack. If she smirks at you again send a copy to her parents .

Did your husband write her an NC letter?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## jinba (Apr 26, 2012)

No - no NC letter - didn't even know about those at the time. Since it's been about 10 years, I think it's too late for that. Besides, I'm sure she'd consider it as him "wanting" contact with her again - like I said, she's a real whack job!


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## oaksthorne (Mar 4, 2011)

jinba said:


> Some good suggestions here - thanks! Don't know that I have the courage to do any of them, but it's definitely food for thought. I've never confronted her - feeling that what goes around comes around, and she'll get her just reward someday.
> 
> I do have a lot of information that could cause her a lot of grief within our community - she's kind of a whack job - even threatened suicide when my H tried to dump her - and told him that if he didn't want her there were 4 other men in town who did - LOL - the dumb ass should have realized where he stood right then and there. I don't think she really gave a damn about him - it was the attention she craved - and the feeling that she was somehow better or more desirable than me or the other women whose men she was involved with.
> 
> Her husband knew about her involvement with mine, but I'm not sure how much he really knew. He's one of those hard fast and true Catholics who would never even consider divorcing her - which might be a good thing for the rest of us - if she's this bad when she's married, imagine how aweful she would be if she were single!!!


I believe that adultery is grounds for D in the Catholic church. Maybe you should write out a detailed timeline and send it to her H, in a form that cannot be intercepted, and while you are at it a note to his/her priest might be in order too. One expressing your concern for her immortal soul etc. Nothing stops this type of behavior like complete exposure. If wiping the smirk off her face is your goal, this aught to do it.


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## iheartlife (Apr 4, 2012)

Hmmm....at the risk of sounding like a revenge-seeking betrayed spouse :rofl: I rather like the sound of that.

Infidelity is grounds for divorce in all christian churches, as far as I understand it--it is in the Bible.

I'm pretty sure that smirk would be long gone. But I'm sure there are hags out there who would turn around and spew lies about you and make your life more miserable, so that in the end it wasn't worth it. Only you can weigh the cost / benefit analysis. But boy, I want to hear the story if you do...


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## jinba (Apr 26, 2012)

Wheels are turning now - wow you all make some valid points. I do know where her H works, so sending him the details without her intercepting would be easy.

But ... she is one of those "hags" who would likely make my life hell if I did. 

But then again, how much more hell can she possibly put me through?

Definitely have some thinking to do on this.


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## jinba (Apr 26, 2012)

I DID IT! Posted the OW's name on Cheaterville. Interesting, three other people had searched her name before I got there! I knew she was a "repeat offender" - can't wait to see it published.

A small step, I know, but I feel surprisingly good about it. Thanks to all of you for your support and ideas - I think I'm gaining courage, and for me ... that's a big step!


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