# Men and Gay porn



## rebecca1 (Nov 6, 2010)

My husband and I have a pretty adventurous sex life. We are both very open and honest about what we want and will try new things.

Recently he has begun watching a lot of gay porn (the kind where one guy is dressed like a woman), or at least I just found this out. I know that people go through different stages in life and I asked him if that was something that he was curious about or if it was something he was wanting . He assures me that he would only do something like that with me (ie him dress up, me with a strap-on - prob tmi but hey).

Is this something that a straight guy can enjoy or should I worry that he is gay/ bi? (One of my friends just got divorced after 5yrs when her husband confessed he was gay so I am worried!)

Thanks in advanced for you opinion.


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## Grayson (Oct 28, 2010)

Personally, I don't care much for just "gay," "bi," and "straight" as identifiers. I find the Kinsey scale to be far more accurate, as I don't think there are very many people who are completely "gay" or completely "straight"...maybe 99% one way or the other, so effectively on either end of the spectrum, but I believe the vast majority have some innate curiosity along those lines.

That said, do I think it's possible for a man who identifies as "straight" to enjoy gay porn? Yes, I do. I don't think it's necessarily common, or at least commonly admitted to, but I do think it's possible. Likewise, I think it's possible for a "straight" woman to enjoy lesbian porn. In both scenarios, it's about being comfortable enough in one's skin and mind.

From what you've said in this post, I'd guess he's probably at a 1 on the Kinsey scale, which is classified as "predominantly heterosexual, only incidentally homosexual." At any rate, even if he is closer to the center of the scale, it sounds as if he is content with satisfying any curiosity he has through porn and fantasy with you, rather than stepping outside the bounds of your marriage.

Regardless, it's fantastic that the two of you are open enough with one another to discuss the matter. Kudos!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Cara (Aug 15, 2010)

You say your sex life is adventutous & you're willing to try new things? I say congrats & I don't believe you have anything to worry about.

Lots of people like to watch all kinds of porn. I have watched gay male porn & I am a bisexual female, I guess I just like to watch _people_ doin' it & I am guessing your DH is the same. It's exciting to see new things, especially things you probably will never do IRL. 

If he seems to be becoming obsessed with the gay porn, then a discussion is in order. If it continues to worry you, maybe ask him to watch some gay scenes with you & it might be something you both come to enjoy as a couple.


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

"The Kids are All Right" has a scene on that - the son asks his (gay) moms why they watch gay male porn. Her answer was something about 'our sexuality is all on the inside sometimes its nice to see all that going on OUTSIDE" or something like that.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

As a "straight" man... While I'd agree with the whole spectrum of straight/gay, I can honestly say I've had ZERO desire to seek any gay porn on the Internet, much less "a lot" of it. Then again, there's lots of straight porn I have zero desire to look up either...

Having said that, if he's still into you sexually, it's very possible that he's telling you the truth. That's it's just something he enjoys watching. As far as getting pegged, I guess I figure anything that happens between a man and woman is by definition heterosexual, not homosexual. So if that floats both of your boats, knock yourself out.

I would just keep the communication open, and avoid making nasty comments about homosexuals. Heck, my GF liked watching "Queer as Folk" cause it had hot guys in it, even if they were gay. You might even pick up some old seasons of that...  The more open you are about being ok with it, the more likely he is to be honest with you. At least, that would be my theory... 

C


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

I'd rather set my pubes on fire with a blowtorch and stamp the flames out with rusty track shoes.


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## Mrs.G (Nov 20, 2010)

Grayson said:


> Personally, I don't care much for just "gay," "bi," and "straight" as identifiers. I find the Kinsey scale to be far more accurate, as I don't think there are very many people who are completely "gay" or completely "straight"...maybe 99% one way or the other, so effectively on either end of the spectrum, but I believe the vast majority have some innate curiosity along those lines.
> It is much more acceptable in society for a woman to admit some curiousity than men. If my husband told me that he wanted to cross dress and was watching gay porn, I would run screaming for the hills. I have been conditioned to believe that only gay men like gay porn.
> 
> That said, do I think it's possible for a man who identifies as "straight" to enjoy gay porn? Yes, I do. I don't think it's necessarily common, or at least commonly admitted to, but I do think it's possible. Likewise, I think it's possible for a "straight" woman to enjoy lesbian porn. In both scenarios, it's about being comfortable enough in one's skin and mind. I love lesbian porn because I love to receive oral.  I can also appreciate a gorgeous woman. I tried going to bed with a lady once and it was very disappointing...not what I imagined at all. Glad I tried it though! I identify as a straight woman.
> ...


:iagree: I love intelligent posts like this!


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## rebecca1 (Nov 6, 2010)

Thanks for all the feedback!


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

unbelievable said:


> I'd rather set my pubes on fire with a blowtorch and stamp the flames out with rusty track shoes.


I think I saw that movie. It had Peter North in it.


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## PeteK (Jun 15, 2011)

I am glad that you are open about it and I think this can only be good for your marriage.

My wife and I, we have occasionally watched gay porn. It turns her on for some reason to see 2 men having sex.

I am straight. I have never been with a man. I am not attracted to men. But I sometimes have the same fantasies as your husband of being dressed as a woman and having sex with a man. This might sound odd but the fantasy is more about giving up power than about being attracted to a man.

I have no interest in a gay relationship. I am now 35. I would have done it if I wanted to.

I think fantasies are part of a healthy sex life. And they help us to love each other and accept who we are.

My wife also knows about my crazy fantasies and I can't tell you how grateful I am that she does not judge me. It makes me love her even more.


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## chingchang (Sep 21, 2010)

rebecca1 said:


> My husband and I have a pretty adventurous sex life. We are both very open and honest about what we want and will try new things.
> 
> Recently he has begun watching a lot of gay porn (the kind where one guy is dressed like a woman), or at least I just found this out. I know that people go through different stages in life and I asked him if that was something that he was curious about or if it was something he was wanting . He assures me that he would only do something like that with me (ie him dress up, me with a strap-on - prob tmi but hey).
> 
> ...


I wouldn't worry about this at all. I have no attraction what-so-ever to gay porn...but I know there are guys out there who like it. Some women like lesbian porn...no big deal. It is just a fantasy for him. Maybe you can enjoy it with him? Maybe you can put a strap-on on and do him?

CC


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