# Dog loves dog more than family



## slyoun10 (Apr 27, 2016)

My husband and I have been together for 3 years and married for 7 months. About 1 1/2 years into our relationship we lost my dog (a boxer) and he was looking for new dogs immediately, and within 2 weeks he found a dog that he wanted (a cane corso) and I agreed that he could get it. The dog has been nothing but a nightmare since we got her. Just to give a little bit of background about us, I have 2 children from a previous marriage who my husband takes care of. Their biological father is not involved in their lives, so my husband is who my children know as their father. My husband is a good man, and has definitely stepped up to the plate for my kids. Back to the dog… After a few months of having her she grew to be very big and destructive. She started tearing up a lot of things around the house and potting training just was not working out. So we decided to seek the help of a trainer. The trainer came and assessed her and stated that she may have some psychological issues (the mother bit her at 4 weeks) and should be medicated. The trainer wanted upwards of 3,000 dollars to train her which we agreed was not in our budget. So we went with his advice of getting her fixed, and seeking to medicate her. Well at 1 years of age, and weighing 100lbs, she bit my son (who is 6) in the face. I had went upstairs to put cloths in the dryer when I heard both him and my daughter (who is 4) screaming, and when I reached them my son was laying on the floor covering his face in the fetal position. They immediately told me she bit him, and his cheek was red and puffy, his eye was red and his lip was bleeding. I took pictures and showed my husband and he brushed the whole situation off, and said well IF she did it she didn't mean to… We argue about the dog constantly… We go days without speaking over the dog, and even go the lengths to avoid each other. Finally I asked him to rehome the dog because it was not a good situation for our family or the dog (who now has to be leashed on the door when my kids are around, or in her kennel) he eventually agreed and found her a home with a couple who had experience with large breed dogs, and had no children. Within 36 hours the couple was calling us to come get the dog. I became upset and my husband assured me he would continue the search of finding her a new home. Well 4 months later, the dog is still in my house, and nothing has changed. Every time he finds someone who is interested in the dog he backs out, or makes up excuses. Finally I got so frustrated and told him its me or the dog. I know that is wrong, but I felt like he was just stringing me along, and has no true intentions of rehoming her like he had promised to… My husband packed a bag and left… What should I do? I absolutely hate this dog, and I consider myself to be a dog lover being that I have always had a dog. This is the first instance where I have had to even consider getting rid of a dog. It has gotten to the point I dreaded coming home because of the dog, and would even become anxious when I pulled into my drive way. I feared for my kids safety, and would only let them have minimal contact with her. Our relationship has even dissolved over this dog, and even though I love my husband, I feel myself resenting him and loosing feelings for him (which I hate). We even started going to consoling over this dog which I think is ridiculous. I miss him, and want him to come back (He stated to me as soon as Im ready for him to come home, he'll come running) but I do not want the dog back. Even my kids are saying, "Mommy please tell daddy to come home, but not the dog." It breaks my heart, but I feel like this man loves a dog more than me and my kids…


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## GTdad (Aug 15, 2011)

We have always had dogs, but only one that bit one of our kids. It hurt us all to do so, but that dog was at the shelter the same day. If I was you, I would have done the same whether your husband was on board or not. Having a dog that bites your kids isn't tolerable, and needless to say a dog that size can inflict huge damage. Your child may be very lucky that he didn't suffer a disfiguring injury.

And your H is an idiot for not seeing that himself.

I'd tell him that he's welcome back anytime. But without the dog. His response will tell you everything you need to know.


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## happy2gether (Dec 6, 2015)

#1 just because you have always had a dog does not make you a dog lover nor even guarantee you know how to handle one.

#2 is you giving your husband the ultimatum of the dog or your family. NEVER give ultimatums in marriage.



Those being said, I agree the dog likely has problems. You are contributing to those by being so scared and upset around it though. Dogs sense these things though they often can't tell if it means you are going to attack so they get their defenses up. I have rescued hundreds of dogs in my life, and no matter how aggressive folks say they are I have never been bit by a dog "with a problem". I have been bit a couple times by our own dogs, and it was 100000% my fault.


So my advice to you is talk to your husband and see if you can find a compromise. if you can't figure out a problem with a dog, what makes you think you two can figure things out when a real issue comes along?


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## kristin2349 (Sep 12, 2013)

I'll start by saying I love dogs, more than most people. The problem with dogs, especially giant powerful breeds like Cane Corso's come in when you mix an irresponsible breeder, with an undereducated buyer. That dog should have NEVER been put in a home with small children, period, end of story. If your H wants to leave with the dog, let him. You and your children are not safe in the presence of an unstable Cane Corso. Your son is lucky to be alive.


Look at some recent stories involving Cane Corso dogs. I'm not saying this breed is "bad" but an unstable dog in the hands of a lax/inexperienced owner...and being in a home with small children is a recipe for disaster.

http://abcnews.go.com/US/cane-corso-mastiff-fatally-mauls-boy-brooklyn-home/story?id=13714746

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/cri...d-life-cane-corsos-attacked-article-1.1916664

http://www.nbcphiladelphia.com/news...Grandmother-Uncle-Philadelphia-300552331.html

http://www.neweracanecorso.com/CorsosNOTforeveryone.html


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## kristin2349 (Sep 12, 2013)

happy2gether said:


> #1 just because you have always had a dog does not make you a dog lover nor even guarantee you know how to handle one.
> 
> #2 is you giving your husband the ultimatum of the dog or your family. NEVER give ultimatums in marriage.
> 
> ...






This is not just an "average dog" it is a Pit Bull on steroids. This breed (Cane Corso), needs to be in the hands of extremely experienced owners, and not homes with small children.


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## EnjoliWoman (Jul 2, 2012)

Was the dog well socialized? Is the dog well exercised? Does the dog get lots of family time NOT tied to a door? Are the children rough with the dog? Did the child do anything unintentional to provoke? The dog isn't going to get better like that. Pets are a big time suck and commitment.

From what I've read, much like bull terriers, they can be super loyal and loving to family but socialization is important to not be a liability. Mastiff's can be very loving.

Not blaming your children but they do need to know how to read dog body language and to not startle, grab toys or food away from pets or to be grabby with tails, ears and other body parts. 6 and 4 are quite young and can find teasing amusing but with disastrous results. It seems the bite was a warning nip since the dog is quite capable of inflicting major damage.

Your H loves the dog. Your H is great in other ways. The dog will be put down in a shelter. Does the dog have a fenced yard and dog house? 

Personally, I would work with the dog AND my kids together. Teach the dog that the kids are Alpha over the dog and that the dog is a pack member at the bottom of the hierarchy. Do not allow it on furniture or beds. Have your son feed the dog and teach the dog to not eat until he has received the command that it's OK. Don't have a trainer train your dog. YOU train your dog along with your children. If the dog learns that he is to obey the children, he will learn his place in the pack - at the bottom. A pack dog secure in his position with the Alpha at the lead will be obedient. Your children are the perfect ages for reading every night - read a dog training book. Discuss what the book's text MEANS and how the training can be executed since the language might be over their heads. 

Very few dogs cannot be trained. I bet if you took this approach, crate trained and kept the dog on a leash in the house (a great tip by dog trainers btw until they are housebroken), I think you could end up with an amazing family pet.

I know I'll probably get slammed for not getting rid of a dog that bit a kid but I suspect your son did something to upset the dog, perhaps even unintentionally. Educating him about the signs of aggression and how to approach ALL dogs will serve him well. I've only met ONE dog that I'm afraid of due to his issues as a puppy - a Griffon Basset Vandeen, oddly enough - not a large dog. Most dogs will defend their pack (family) to their death if trained properly to trust and be loyal to their family.


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

Dogs are destructive when they are bored. Boredom is typically the root of the problem with all dogs that tear up your house. Having said that, a hundred ten pound mastiff is nothing to screw around with. Either you're capable of handing the animal or you're not. And frankly, not all dogs are good or should be around children. I wonder if the breeder messed up and created a bad one. People seem to want mastiffs, pitbulls etc for the wrong reasons sometimes. 

There's a reason why your local animal shelter is probably 80% filled with these kinds of dogs. People get then and them and they discover they can't handle them or their landlord says they have to get rid of them. I'm not going to tell you what to do but a working dog is in fact a working dog. They need jobs to do. Owners who isolate them and don't allow them to interact with other dogs or have dog chores are asking for trouble. They're not couch potatoes like a Great Dane. 

One of my dogs is a boxer pitbull and she happens to be super lazy. But she's pound for pound the strongest dog I've ever had. She can chase to ground anything short of a full grown deer including younger deer. You have to be prepared for that kind of strength and exuberance.


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## happy2gether (Dec 6, 2015)

kristin2349 said:


> This is not just an "average dog" it is a Pit Bull on steroids. This breed (Cane Corso), needs to be in the hands of extremely experienced owners, and not homes with small children.



I know what a CC is, and I also know that the problem is never the breed no matter what the scared masses say. I agree that they can't handle the dog, but it is their fault not his. Corsos can be great with kids, so long as they are properly trained. and the dog may need training as well. :wink2:


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## kristin2349 (Sep 12, 2013)

happy2gether said:


> I know what a CC is, and I also know that the problem is never the breed no matter what the scared masses say. I agree that they can't handle the dog, but it is their fault not his. Corsos can be great with kids, so long as they are properly trained. and the dog may need training as well. :wink2:



I agree 100% I don't think there are "bad breeds". In this case it is clear this family is already in a dangerous situation. They failed at training on their own, and can't afford a professional trainer. If two experienced dog owners that were given the dog couldn't handle it, it shouldn't be in the house with little kids IMO. Just my .02.


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## karole (Jun 30, 2010)

I wouldn't take a chance that my kids would get bitten again. If he won't get rid of the dog, then stick to your ultimatum. Your kids' welfare should come first.


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## zookeeper (Oct 2, 2012)

slyoun10 said:


> Well at 1 years of age, and weighing 100lbs, she bit my son (who is 6) in the face. I had went upstairs to put cloths in the dryer when I heard both him and my daughter (who is 4) screaming, and when I reached them my son was laying on the floor covering his face in the fetal position. They immediately told me she bit him, and his cheek was red and puffy, his eye was red and his lip was bleeding.


You left a 4 and 6 year old alone with a 100lb dog, particularly one with behavioral problems? 

The dog doesn't know any better. You should have. I am glad that this didn't end up as the tragedy it very well could have.


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## Bananapeel (May 4, 2015)

Most of the problems with dogs are due to the owner's not knowing or being able to properly train and socialize them. Unfortunately, it is a lot easier to prevent these problems from occurring than to deal with them after they develop. In my house we have a zero bite policy, so if any dog bites it is euthanized. I don't care if the kids provoked it or whether it was random. I am just unwilling to have a dog injure or kill my children. However, since the whole family understands that rule we make sure that the dogs are properly socialized and trained and any aggressive behavior is dealt with immediately before it gets out of hand. Maybe you need to do a little research and show your husband that dogs do mame/kill kids and see if it is really worth the risk to him. Most municipalities also have rules regarding dangerous dogs and he should be aware what could be awaiting him for ignoring the rules, by having a potentially dangerous dog around. 

Enjoli is correct that retraining the dog is possible. However, most people that have dogs like this didn't have the time to put into the dog to make it a good pet when it was young and aren't going to be dedicated enough to put the extra time and money into fixing the problem now that it has developed. In my opinion the dog needs to go for safety reasons. For your next dog take it on daily walks so it can be socialized with other people/animals and do some basic obedience classes and problems like you're facing will probably never arise.


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## MarriedDude (Jun 21, 2014)

Runs like Dog said:


> Dogs are destructive when they are bored. Boredom is typically the root of the problem with all dogs that tear up your house. Having said that, a hundred ten pound mastiff is nothing to screw around with. Either you're capable of handing the animal or you're not. And frankly, not all dogs are good or should be around children. I wonder if the breeder messed up and created a bad one. People seem to want mastiffs, pitbulls etc for the wrong reasons sometimes.
> 
> There's a reason why your local animal shelter is probably 80% filled with these kinds of dogs. People get then and them and they discover they can't handle them or their landlord says they have to get rid of them. I'm not going to tell you what to do but a working dog is in fact a working dog. *They need jobs to do. Owners who isolate them and don't allow them to interact with other dogs or have dog chores are asking for trouble. They're not couch potatoes like a Great Dane. *
> 
> One of my dogs is a *boxer pitbull* and she happens to be super lazy. But she's pound for pound the strongest dog I've ever had. She can chase to ground anything short of a full grown deer including younger deer. You have to be prepared for that kind of strength and exuberance.


Exactly. Dogs aren't to be just left at home ALL DAY while you work, etc....bored out of their minds. Bad things will happen.

We have several dogs -one of which is a Boxer-Pit. She is the sweetest dog imaginable. But she has a job -she guards a 30 acre equipment yard on our property. Everyday. She walks a border...knows who should be there and who shouldn't. Meets my youngest son at the bus stop everyday and walks him home. She is large, VERY strong and intimidating as all get out to those that don't know her. She hasn't bit anyone....but she gets her hair up and teeth barred if a stranger comes near the fence or attempts to force a gate. I have watched it on video. Scary...but she won't cross the boundary. 

Dogs need a life. They need stuff to do.


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## syhoybenden (Feb 21, 2013)

Get logical.

Your children are your children.

A dog is just a dog. In Korea or China it would be an entree.

This time it bit his face. Lucky he didn't lose an eye.

Next time, what if it crushes his throat? Is a dog worth a child?

Take the beast to a shelter, or have it put down.


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## Illbehisfoolagain (May 7, 2012)

Sadly, you guys got a dog that is WAY out of your league and everyone is suffering for it. The breeder should have NEVER sold this animal to you guys. I will never understand why breeders of this breed do not to extensive research on those who wish to purchase their puppies. I know 3 people who over the years have purchased CC puppies and only 1 of them kept the dog past a year old. My guess is that if your husband is wiling to end the relationship over this, it would have ended in short time anyway. The dog will end up biting again for certain.


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## slyoun10 (Apr 27, 2016)

I agree we got a dog out of our league and greatly regret it. When I got my boxer I did extensive research to make sure it would be a good breed for my kids… Because my husband came to me and said this was his "dream" dog, I trusted that he had done the research and was prepared and aware of what we were getting into.. I was wrong.


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## Mclane (Apr 28, 2016)

I don't understand the title of this thread.


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## NobodySpecial (Nov 22, 2013)

kristin2349 said:


> This is not just an "average dog" it is a Pit Bull on steroids.


Here it begins. The trashing of the pit bull. 



> This breed (Cane Corso), needs to be in the hands of extremely experienced owners, and not homes with small children.


Oh I just googled the breed. What a pretty puppy!

"Smart, *trainable*, and noble of bearing; assertive and confident, Corsi are peerless protectors. "


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## NobodySpecial (Nov 22, 2013)

So I guess if a dog bit my kid, the dog would be gone. That said, you have not been fair to the dog. Calling one highly priced trainer then giving up is not training your dog. There are low cost community programs, books, videos... lots of ways to learn to train your dog.


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## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

First I would like to say that I am a huge dog person. Owned one all my life and probably always will. Dogs take work and sounds like you got into this breed without doing research and now the dog is running the show. I am horrified by your husbands lack of parenting that would allow this animal around his kids. I love my black lab but if she bit my kids she would be done. My single most important job as a father is to protect my kids. That comes first.

You're a bit stuck. Really boils down to do you want to pay the 3k for a professional trainer or more for divorce. With his lack of compassion for the kids I would suggest you invest in your future and get rid of him and the dog.


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## kristin2349 (Sep 12, 2013)

NobodySpecial said:


> Here it begins. The trashing of the pit bull.
> 
> 
> Oh I just googled the breed. What a pretty puppy!
> ...




I'm not trashing pit bulls. I love dogs, I don't think there are "bad breeds" I do think there are plenty of bad breeders and un or under educated people that buy an unsuitable breed. Don't try to pick a fight where there isn't one. If you think the situation described has anything to do with trashing a breed instead of the safety of the kids you missed the point. I'm very familiar with the breed, they are only trainable by someone with experience, OP's H is not that guy obvi.


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## dash74 (Jan 3, 2015)

A dog that bites is like a cheating spouse it's hard to trust them again. If they fail your trust again someone is going to get hurt, sometimes very bad


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## 3Xnocharm (Jun 22, 2012)

The fact that your husband chose the dog over you and your children's safety should tell you all you need to know about where you rank with him. What a jerk. 

Corsos are amazing dogs, but you cannot let them run the show. Find a Corso rescue to take him, they will take the time to properly rehome him someplace suitable.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Cane Corso: What's Good About 'Em? What's Bad About 'Em?

Wrong kind of dog for your environment and family.


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## Spotthedeaddog (Sep 27, 2015)

slyoun10 said:


> My husband and I have been together for 3 years and married for 7 months. About 1 1/2 years into our relationship we lost my dog (a boxer) and he was looking for new dogs immediately, and within 2 weeks he found a dog that he wanted (a cane corso) and I agreed that he could get it. The dog has been nothing but a nightmare since we got her. Just to give a little bit of background about us, I have 2 children from a previous marriage who my husband takes care of. Their biological father is not involved in their lives, so my husband is who my children know as their father. My husband is a good man, and has definitely stepped up to the plate for my kids. Back to the dog… After a few months of having her she grew to be very big and destructive. She started tearing up a lot of things around the house and potting training just was not working out. So we decided to seek the help of a trainer. The trainer came and assessed her and stated that she may have some psychological issues (the mother bit her at 4 weeks) and should be medicated. The trainer wanted upwards of 3,000 dollars to train her which we agreed was not in our budget. So we went with his advice of getting her fixed, and seeking to medicate her. Well at 1 years of age, and weighing 100lbs, she bit my son (who is 6) in the face. I had went upstairs to put cloths in the dryer when I heard both him and my daughter (who is 4) screaming, and when I reached them my son was laying on the floor covering his face in the fetal position. They immediately told me she bit him, and his cheek was red and puffy, his eye was red and his lip was bleeding. I took pictures and showed my husband and he brushed the whole situation off, and said well IF she did it she didn't mean to… We argue about the dog constantly… We go days without speaking over the dog, and even go the lengths to avoid each other. Finally I asked him to rehome the dog because it was not a good situation for our family or the dog (who now has to be leashed on the door when my kids are around, or in her kennel) he eventually agreed and found her a home with a couple who had experience with large breed dogs, and had no children. Within 36 hours the couple was calling us to come get the dog. I became upset and my husband assured me he would continue the search of finding her a new home. Well 4 months later, the dog is still in my house, and nothing has changed. Every time he finds someone who is interested in the dog he backs out, or makes up excuses. Finally I got so frustrated and told him its me or the dog. I know that is wrong, but I felt like he was just stringing me along, and has no true intentions of rehoming her like he had promised to… My husband packed a bag and left… What should I do? I absolutely hate this dog, and I consider myself to be a dog lover being that I have always had a dog. This is the first instance where I have had to even consider getting rid of a dog. It has gotten to the point I dreaded coming home because of the dog, and would even become anxious when I pulled into my drive way. I feared for my kids safety, and would only let them have minimal contact with her. Our relationship has even dissolved over this dog, and even though I love my husband, I feel myself resenting him and loosing feelings for him (which I hate). We even started going to consoling over this dog which I think is ridiculous. I miss him, and want him to come back (He stated to me as soon as Im ready for him to come home, he'll come running) but I do not want the dog back. Even my kids are saying, "Mommy please tell daddy to come home, but not the dog." It breaks my heart, but I feel like this man loves a dog more than me and my kids…


Grow up and be an adult and look after your kids, get the animal put down, for the safety of the humans.

The children are competing pack members to her, she will fight to keep her position and attempt to put them (especially the males) in their place whenever more dominant pack members aren't around.

The behaviour could have been changed when she was young, or if you are very dominant (many "dog lovers" aren't, they rely on being "pack mates", or litter mates, which doesn't work with a habituated dominant dog).

You just have to make the adult choice, the animal, or your children.


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## BBF (May 21, 2015)

Your hubs is an idiot and should be fixed. Euthanize the dog. Don't pass your bad experience on to another unexpecting pet lover. The dog should be put down. It harmed a child.


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## frusdil (Sep 5, 2013)

I'm a huge dog lover, I love our 3 beautiful dogs so much. Hubby and SD love them too. I'm not one who necessarily is for the "one and done" mentality when it comes to dogs biting kids. The reality is, kids *sometimes* do horrible things to dogs. Intentional or not, kids will behave like kids and dogs will react like dogs. I am often appalled at the attitude of parents, who seriously believe that their dog should tolerate children climbing all over them, pulling their ears/tail, poking them in the eyes....I think wtf?

I run a dog rescue and we've taken in many "horrible" dogs who have "attacked" a child in the family. When I arrive to collect the dog, and see the atrocious behaviour of these awful children and their moronic parents I see the full picture. In every case, EVERY SINGLE ONE, we've rehomed the dog successfully. They are beautiful dogs, who were pushed to their limit by bratty children. Simple as that.

In this case, when I read what happened I was like "wtf was the mother thinking leaving the kids alone with a big, powerful dog that she knows has issues to start with?". 

Like Pit Bulls, when well bred and raised correctly, Cane Corso's can be lovely dogs. But they are NOT dogs for inexperienced owners, who've never had a powerful breed before. They require a lot of training, that must be ongoing during their lifetime. Most people just aren't willing to put the work in to own a dog like this - and the dog pays the price.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*This dog needs to go ... and should have a very long time ago!

Without exception, the ultimate welfare of the family comes first!!*
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Why not find a cane corso rescue group? See if you can find one who will take the dog. Generally breed specific rescue groups are good at finding people who have the knowledge/skill for their particular breed. 

I agree with those on here who say that a large part of the problem is that you and your husband have little idea on how to handle this breed. 

I have 3 large dogs.. my largest is about 130 lbs. Each one is a different breed and have many breed specific aspects to their personality and behaviors. Therefore each has to be handled a bit differently. A dog is not just a dog. Dogs were breed for specific jobs. If you cannot give that dog his desired job, he will create his own job and you will not like it. Clearly your dog decided that his job is to be distructive and to try to control the kids through intimidation.


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