# What Do Women "Really" Think of Men



## nice777guy

Stealing from a thread that has been VERY popular in the Men's clubhouse:

I've heard it said that Women think that Men are sexist, egotistical and stubborn, and that we have little power over anything, including oursleves!

What do Women really think of Men? I'm curious to hear the good, the bad and the ugly.


----------



## deejov

This will greatly depend on the self-esteem level of the woman responding.

If you are a strong woman, independent, and "pro women's lib"...
Men are not as strong as women.
They are predicatable.
They are totally "lost" in the new age of not knowing where they belong in a relationship.

If you are a bit old fashioned...
Men are everything you said. Because that's what they "show" to the world. Ego first. 
Truly, They are still totally lost in the new age of not knowing where they belong in a relationship.


----------



## that_girl

I think men are more capable than society lets them be.

I think men are in a constant struggle between being human and feeling emotions, and being a "man" and shutting all emotions out. This leads to frustration and sometimes anger.

I think men want to be loved, but don't know how to just come out and say it--- in fear of looking like a pu$$y.

I think society gives boys (who grow up to be men) mixed signals on how to be a man. Finding the balance is hard, I believe. Can't be too sensitive, can't be too macho, and if you are, there's a stigma for that too.

I think men have grown up in a world that expects them to behave like women (girls). In school, in social settings, etc...and this leads into the betaman syndrome. Boys are not girls. Learn the difference and you'll raise a wonderful man.

I think men are confused as to what women want. I think this comes in part because women are confused to what they want. Our society has stripped us from our traditional roles (roles that worked well) and made everyone somewhat gender-neutral. No one really knowing WHAT type of man or woman they are which leads to unhappy unions between the sexes.

I think men express their feelings through actions rather than words.

I think men need to feel needed and valued. They like to fix things and need to feel wanted.

I think my husband's body is probably the sexiest thing I've ever seen. If there was ever a perfect body, his is it....and funny thing, he's not perfect by the media's standards. 

I think men want to be with one woman...a GOOD WOMAN...for the rest of their lives, but are told they should want more. More sex, more women, more more more. 

I think I am making these assumptions based on the men I've known. I know not all men are equal or the same. I actually prefer to hang out with men. I've always been like that. They settle issues better, they rarely hold grudges, and they don't have to talk all the time-- especially about things I don't care about (makeup, movies, etc...) I am very happy that my new boss is a man. Less drama in the office.

I do love men, though. I've known some awesome men in my life....family members, friends' dads, my friends. My husband takes the cake though. He's the perfect balance of sensitivity and machismo. Sexy and strong.


----------



## Therealbrighteyes

nice777guy said:


> Stealing from a thread that has been VERY popular in the Men's clubhouse:
> 
> I've heard it said that Women think that Men are sexist, egotistical and stubborn, and that we have little power over anything, including oursleves!
> 
> What do Women really think of Men? I'm curious to hear the good, the bad and the ugly.


I think that SOME men are as you described but those are not men I care to have in my life.
Of the men I know, they are loving, protective, caring, emotional, intelligent, funny and problem solvers. They want to know that what they do (in all senses) matters. They want to be admired and respected. They want to feel loved. They want a safe place to land. They want to be good fathers and role models. 
I do not, nor will I ever think a man has little power over anything. If that is the case, then it is by his choosing....victimhood. That goes for both sexes though.


----------



## nice777guy

Therealbrighteyes said:


> I think that SOME men are as you described but those are not men I care to have in my life.
> Of the men I know, they are loving, protective, caring, emotional, intelligent, funny and problem solvers. They want to know that what they do (in all senses) matters. They want to be admired and respected. They want to feel loved. They want a safe place to land. They want to be good fathers and role models.
> I do not, nor will I ever think a man has little power over anything. If that is the case, then it is by his choosing....victimhood. That goes for both sexes though.


I started to keep it exactly the same as the post in the Men's Room and say that I've heard women are in "awe" of men!!! Of course, I've never heard that, but I have heard comments similar to what I wrote above.


----------



## that_girl

I am in awe of men.

lol.

Mostly when my husband has friends over to work on the cars...and they'll be out there for HOURS and no words will be spoken.



Then they'll hang out with beers and say one or two words--- then laugh. Then silence. 

When the guys leave, I hear, "Great night, man...gotta do it again soon..."

LOLLLL It's awe inspiring.


----------



## Therealbrighteyes

nice777guy said:


> I started to keep it exactly the same as the post in the Men's Room and say that I've heard women are in "awe" of men!!! Of course, I've never heard that, but I have heard comments similar to what I wrote above.


Ah but it isn't the same. This thread is going in a vastly different way....focusing on the positives of men. The other thread focused on porn stars, ball busters and harpies. What's the difference? Well, when a woman is being attacked and lumped together as a singular group, we fight back.


----------



## nice777guy

Therealbrighteyes said:


> Ah but it isn't the same. This thread is going in a vastly different way....focusing on the positives of men. The other thread focused on porn stars, ball busters and harpies. What's the difference? Well, when a woman is being attacked and lumped together as a singular group, we fight back.


I could also point out that women seem to invade the men's clubhouse - while we tend to mind our own business a bit better!!!


----------



## Therealbrighteyes

deejov said:


> This will greatly depend on the self-esteem level of the woman responding.
> 
> If you are a strong woman, independent, and "pro women's lib"...
> Men are not as strong as women.
> They are predicatable.
> They are totally "lost" in the new age of not knowing where they belong in a relationship.
> 
> If you are a bit old fashioned...
> Men are everything you said. Because that's what they "show" to the world. Ego first.
> Truly, They are still totally lost in the new age of not knowing where they belong in a relationship.


I totally disagree. You can be pro womens liberation and see men as your equal. I would argue that feminism has nothing to do with men at all, it has to do with how women see themselves and their opportunities. A woman who views herself as equal does not see a man as lost, not as strong and predictable as this would be a reflection of her. She sees men as her partner, her cohort and her confidant. A worthy man views her the same way.


----------



## SimplyAmorous

I appreciate Men. 

In my lifetime, pretty nearing from toddlerhood, to my parents, to relatives , to even my friendships today, if I had to compare ....MEN have been kinder to me over women in my life -by a long shot. I have never cared for the pettiness of women, the backbiting, even I seem to offend them , men are more gracious, more forgiving, more understanding. It has always been MY experience. So I speak out of it- I guess. 

Even as a toddler, I consider my bestest friend to have been a neighborhood boy -I just liked him better -he was more fun, I didn't want to play with dolls. He taught me how to ride my bike, we climbed trees together, and buried my mom's jewelry, Then he moved away, little girl me missed him very much. 

I am sure it helps I have never let a man use me, abuse me in romantic relationships, I always put the brake on. I married correctly, and I hold firm boundaries with the men in my life. Living in a house full of testosterone, reading endless books on boys, men, I understand them well, and love & appreciate many of their ways. Even if they are more mysterious, even back offish in comparison to women. 

My answers here are more a reflection on the Old Fashioned type man.... the Good, responsible ones....who want to PROVIDE, live to PROTECT, live to give pleasure, caring more about the woman's sometimes more than his own- how beautiful is that, if you have one like this. I love their sacrifice in war, bravery unto death. I would NOT be so brave. 

I look to men as a comfort, the physcially stronger to Sheild us, how on the Titanic, women went 1st in those row boats. This is a Good man's belief system towards us women, the weaker physically. Though men are weaken in the Sexual sense and we need to PROVIDE here willingly to show our respect & love for them --our role as women. 

I LOVE how they will readily help a woman in near anything, if they see her stranded beside the road, open a door for her, pick up her books, Gentlemen ROCK! 

I love a sensitive man , but strong minded at the same time. Stable, not seeking to impress but just BE. A quiet confidence is so attractive TO ME. A loud obknoxious drunk would be VILE, or a Bragging athlete to how many women he can get in bed. 

I love how FUNNY men are- when they are just being themselves, not even trying to make us laugh- women can not compare. When I was in 2nd grade, the teachers had to literally put me outside of the classroom cause I could not stop laughing at these 2 boys, I was disrupting the whole class. Been laughing ever since. :rofl:

I love how men are assertive, they tell it like it is, no Bullshi**, I always find it rather amusing how women can never handle their honesty -- but I see it as a HUGE plus. I love how laid back they are in comparison to women, not so worried about "Proper etiquette", I alwyas find it amusing how they don't care how dishelved they look, how dirty they smell, sometimes like Dogs, --how they almost NEED a woman to straighten them out, how if they live alone, their fridge is empty, no decorations on the wall, clearly they need a woman's touch. We can do so much for them! They are almost lost without us! 

I love how they genuinelly want to FIX things, I like this, but where they go wrong is not listening to their women's *feelings *before they do all this FIXING. Women are generallly a little better listeners. Comforters even. 

*Some things I don't like*...thier LUST for sports, some of them are near insane when they get around some football fans. Their LUST for computer Games , I don't get it, games bore me to tears. 

How they can not stop and ask for directions when they are clearly in a pickle, I find this very silly - as a woman.

Men who need inordinate amounts of time in thier Cave, lots of personal space, I know how NORMAL this is for the majority of men, but it's not a trait I particularly care for . My husband is different for some reason - I love that he escaped this need. 

I wouldn't want the Work a holics male-where thier family, homelife is clearly behind the ladder of worldly success -feeling this is thier contribution-what more do you want attitude- to thier lonely wives. I'd rather live mediorce , struggle a little and be romantically entangled , I prefer a more needy emotional man -if that makes sense. NOt one so independent, he could happily live without me. 

I appreciate the sexual side of Men. The way God designed them. It doesn't bother me personally that men are visual creatures, even my own husband. How boring it would be to take this DRIVE from man. It would emasculate them somehow. To those who choose to respectfully & responsibly restrain, sure he LOOKS, but he would never touch, USE -controls his lusts and is only devoted hopelessly to one woman, these are the finest of men. God help women to understand them. 

For those who struggle to keep it in thier pants, going crazy wanting "variety", this is not a good thing at all - this is infact a curse. ONe of the bigger problems men struggle with. Not one of their better traits . Though too high of Test is at the root. 

..... A man who keeps himself from addictions by right living....where character is more important that the world's riches or climbing ladders of worldly success.... can love ONE woman passionately for his entire lifetime.....who finds his destiny in Providing & protecting his family.... where his children will look up to him with admiration on how he raised them, being that manly example...... his wife feeling he IS the "wing beneath her wings".... now there is a REAL man, the type I admire... I count my husband one of these.


----------



## Therealbrighteyes

nice777guy said:


> I could also point out that women seem to invade the men's clubhouse - while we tend to mind our own business a bit better!!!


And you are here because?

We "invade" the men's clubhouse because so much of what is written there is vast generalities about women and it paints women in a very negative light. I like to hang out there because I like to learn more about men. If I wanted to learn more about women, I would call my friends.


----------



## Nikki1023

There is nothing sexier than a man who is confident and knows who he is. 

There is nothing more disgusting than a man who lies about who he is, to himself and other people.


----------



## YupItsMe

Nikki1023 said:


> There is nothing sexier than a man who is confident and knows who he is.
> 
> There is nothing more disgusting than a man who lies about who he is, to himself and other people.


There you go.

For instance referring to yourself as a "nice guy" is pure silliness for precisely that reason. Its purely self flattery which is always a chicken **** phony shame. Deceitful to its core.

My divorced, lonely, boring azz brother in law prides himself a "nice guy" and its total bull****. He is not a nice guy. Hes a fake that pretends to be nice because he thinks that will win him the prizes he desires from life. 

I laugh while I puke when I see him in action because he cant figure it out. We dont get along despite my eagerness because I dont have a brother. He acts like a woman. My buddies and I wonder if he's gay.

Nice guy pfft. 

I skimmed the free online copy of "No more Mr nice guy" to see if it would help him and found it pretty weak Captain Obvious material. Besides, I wouldnt want to mess up the sideshow that his lying wussy azz provides me pretending to be nice.


----------



## that_girl

nice777guy said:


> I could also point out that women seem to invade the men's clubhouse - while we tend to mind our own business a bit better!!!


I didn't realize women weren't allowed :scratchhead:

This is a chat board, no? If we all minded our business, it wouldn't work very well. lol.


----------



## YupItsMe

Brian. said:


> I wholeheartedly agree. I was gonna make a thread about it sometime actually.
> 
> *Great idea. Id love to read other perspectives on that nauseating silliness.*
> 
> There seems to be a fad among guys to refer to themselves as nice guys, when really most of the time they're not. They might be passive,shy, doormats or whatever but that doesn't equate to being a genuine nice guy.
> 
> _*Only wimps with a self esteem crises, engage in self flattery *_
> 
> What makes "nice guys" nicer than any other normal average alright guy?


Self described "nice guys" are not nice. They have hidden anger because they dont get what they think they deserve.

Success with women that dismiss their phony act because women are looking for a source to satisfy primal and compansionship needs of which phony "nice guy" pansies cant meet.


----------



## YupItsMe

Brian. said:


> That's exactly the impression I get from "nice guys".
> 
> I know many alright decent guys who are genuinly "nice", keyword being genuinly. And they sure as hell don't proclaim that they are "nice guys" and whine about how no woman wants them because since they are *genuinly* good guys they don't have a problem with that.


I think you nailed it brother. Genuine "nice" guys sure as hell dont need to mention it or go out of their way to play a phony role to trick someone into believeing it to be so. Its just obvious.


----------



## Lon

FTR, I have been referring to myself as a "niceguy" a lot on here. I don't really mean it as a form of modesty either - though I definitely fit that description. Until recently I've never made the connection that my "niceness" wasn't insincere - I sincerely believed I've always been selfless, that I go so far out of my way to maintain the peace, be inoffensive, ensure people think good things about me... one thing about the no more mr nice guy is it did pull the sheets down from over my face and I realized I've been doing all the nice guy things for the wrong reasons... I'm 35 and depressed because all this time I've been trying harder and harder to remain inoffensive and becoming more lonely, disconnected and jaded, and yeah I do think being one of this type of guy has been ultimately deceitful and dishonest, not because I think calling myself a nice guy is a way to make myself get away with being a jerk, but because all along it has been the way I am in order to get things, rather than just accepting my needs and fulfilling them, I've expected things from others without their consent or knowledge. I now find myself at the bottom of a deep dark hole that is going to be a huge challenge to get out of, which I can't do by myself and honestly don't think I can ever get completely out of, I don't know that I can ever be integreted - confident and know it, but I already do know a lot about myself and that I have tremendous value, just not sure how to spend it.


----------



## that_girl

My husband is a nice guy..not by his words though. He's sincere, honest, hard working and truly cares.

People who know him say he's an ass LOL Little do they know...

His good friends know who he is...and he has nothing to prove.


----------



## RECHTSANWALT

that_girl said:


> I think men are confused as to what women want. I think this comes in part because women are confused to what they want. Our society has stripped us from our traditional roles (roles that worked well) and made everyone somewhat gender-neutral. No one really knowing WHAT type of man or woman they are which leads to unhappy unions between the sexes.


This is a good point. We should be allowed to have our individuality within reasonable limits, respect others for what they are and stop taking the media too seriously. We've come to a point where the only difference between being a woman and man is the physical aspect.


----------



## RECHTSANWALT

Catherine,
While I can understand the context of your comments, I do not entirely agree with them.


Catherine602 said:


> 1. There are men who are responsible for some of the greatest atrocities visited on humanity all directed towards the more vulnerable ...


If hypothetically, women had greater share of power, they would have done the same. At its height the British empire was ruled by a woman. Didn't make life any easier in the colonies. The Boer war, Amritsar massacre happened under her reign. There are 'bad' and 'good' PEOPLE. Women have historically not had the opportunity.



Catherine602 said:


> 2. When it comes to sex, many men see nothing morally wrong with objectifying women.


I understand & agree with this. But some girls of 20 like to marry older women (like Huffner - playboy) maybe because of the money. There are some women also who are guilty of "romance tourism" - go to Jamaica and get men with good figure for sex for some money though they do not agree this is prostitution.



Catherine602 said:


> 3. The pervasive hostility to the natural female rhythms of hormonal changes.


But many men are not like this from my knowledge. 



Catherine602 said:


> What is the percentage of women who do porn have been raped or sexually assaulted in childhood? What is percentage of men think porn is an industry that preys on the vulnerability of women and children (rape victims, sexually abused victims, drug addicted, misguided teens and young women, sex slaves).


I am against the porn industry. Certainly the coercion of women through contracts is at blame. But I think the problem is that as a Christian nation, American puts great deal on high morals, and leaves the deviants as a footnote. I would like prostitution to be legalised, but only the woman should benefit from that. In this way, it is totally upto her about her choices. We should accept that a good number of people will like to have a less restrictive sexual code and give them the avenue. Porn hides the unpleasant aspects, for example, a 20 minute scene takes about 6 hours. And the women and men, who are portrayed as the ideal sexual people, are very hurt & sore. 



Catherine602 said:


> There was a war on drugs, why can't the same thing be done to protect innocent kids, ... Why are prostitutes arrested but not their johns or pimps? There would be no prostitution if a vigorous campaign were instituted to arrest and jail men who use prostitutes along with the prostitute.


Catherine, many op-eds in The Economist & Financial Times felt that the war on drugs is a failure. Esp in America, people are locked up for taking mild drugs. Lots of money has been spent on the drugs war. Some people believe the banks are benefitting from Drugs, because they launder money and have a vested interested in keeping drugs illegal. I also think so.

As for banning prostitution, it is not going to work. Treat them as humans, but yes, ban the agents and street soliciting. It has worked reasonably well in Denmark, NZ and some European countries like Germany. 

MfG


----------



## YinPrincess

What do I think of men... Hmmm... I have a lot of bad programming from the childhood years, BUT I've learned to appreciate the differences.

I like that men are stronger, less emotional... Even though I really like to see some expression of emotion sometimes.

I like that men are more comfortable in roles of authority and power...

I like that men are simple, for the most part. 

As a woman, I sometimes feeling hampered and burdened with the emotional aspects of things. Men are great in their ability to comparmentalize and seperate things.

Bad programming says... Men can't be trusted. Men aren't naturally monogamous, (as women might not be, either). Men can be difficult to relate to... (I know, it is MY problem... but still a difficulty, as I'm sure it is for some others).


----------



## AFEH

Catherine602 said:


> This is lame ladies. Where is the Ian of the women lounge? The posts in the men's clubhouse were for the most part bitter, angry, criticle and condescending. It brought the haters in record numbers to spew their venom. I can never understand why women have a hard time giving it back to men in equal measure.


Ha! Your glasses are very tainted, as far as I'm concerned seeing things that weren’t there.

Come on, do the right thing and post actual examples of what you mean by the men being as you say “bitter, angry, critical and condescending”. And maybe we’ll find it’s my glasses that are tainted.

But come on Catherine, you put it out there, now respond to my challenge and give actual examples from that thread instead of innuendo and maybe you will enlighten me. I assure you I have an open mind about it and I’m always ready to learn.


----------



## nice777guy

Catherine (keep wanting to call you Cat..) - you may have just stepped up as the Ian of your side of the house. You won't take it this way, but I actually mean that as a compliment.

"Nice guy" - I don't think I'm the actual subject of the above discussion - by here's my 2 cents...

I picked my name BEFORE understanding what being a Nice Guy meant on this board. I still think its a reasonable name for myself - and - on this board - I wear it both with a bit of pride, but also kind of like a Scarlett letter. In many ways it represents what I need to improve on. But I also don't fully embrace this board's attitude towards my kind.

I think there are many Nice Guys who are living perfectly great lives with the "right" kind of woman. I feel like trying to do some of the things that have been suggested to me on this board would be the equivalent of putting on a mask. Much of it would be a temporary fix.

In other words - changing myself based on the advice I receive around here - trying to change WHO I AM - at my core - is pointless. I embrace my differences, although I sometimes struggle with the consequences. 

At the end of the day - I choose to be true to myself. I take the good advice, and leave the bad. And I don't try to pretend to be someone I'm not - just to get other people to like me. Whether they be women - or the men on this board.

"I" think men are competitive. I think when younger, we're too aggressive given what little knowledge we have to work with. I think sometimes we're confused - stuck between trying to be a "new age" guy, but still retain some qualities of a "Real Man" - be it Ward Cleaver or John Wayne.

But for the most part, I think our problems and issues match up fairly well with our female counterparts. We're all human - we all have issues - and both genders have very DIVERSE populations.


----------



## Acorn

AFEH said:


> Ha! Your glasses are very tainted, as far as I'm concerned seeing things that weren’t there.
> 
> Come on, do the right thing and post actual examples of what you mean by the men being as you say “bitter, angry, critical and condescending”. And maybe we’ll find it’s my glasses that are tainted.
> 
> But come on Catherine, you put it out there, now respond to my challenge and give actual examples from that thread instead of innuendo and maybe you will enlighten me. I assure you I have an open mind about it and I’m always ready to learn.


In the other thread, Catherine said "These responses are more about the men themselves nothing about what men think about women.", and therefore I'm choosing to go with her post as her opening up to what she believes rather than any referendum on the male gender. Her post is her view. Her glasses are only tainted in that they are not the same shade as yours. 

You and I are perfectly capable of going over to the other thread and deciding for ourselves whether the posts were as bad as she thought they were, and forming opinions from there, but Catherine cannot be wrong if that's what she feels. The thread did ask for her opinion, after all.


----------



## Trenton

nice777guy said:


> Catherine (keep wanting to call you Cat..) - you may have just stepped up as the Ian of your side of the house. You won't take it this way, but I actually mean that as a compliment.
> 
> "Nice guy" - I don't think I'm the actual subject of the above discussion - by here's my 2 cents...
> 
> I picked my name BEFORE understanding what being a Nice Guy meant on this board. I still think its a reasonable name for myself - and - on this board - I wear it both with a bit of pride, but also kind of like a Scarlett letter. In many ways it represents what I need to improve on. But I also don't fully embrace this board's attitude towards my kind.
> 
> I think there are many Nice Guys who are living perfectly great lives with the "right" kind of woman. I feel like trying to do some of the things that have been suggested to me on this board would be the equivalent of putting on a mask. Much of it would be a temporary fix.
> 
> In other words - changing myself based on the advice I receive around here - trying to change WHO I AM - at my core - is pointless. I embrace my differences, although I sometimes struggle with the consequences.
> 
> At the end of the day - I choose to be true to myself. I take the good advice, and leave the bad. And I don't try to pretend to be someone I'm not - just to get other people to like me. Whether they be women - or the men on this board.
> 
> "I" think men are competitive. I think when younger, we're too aggressive given what little knowledge we have to work with. I think sometimes we're confused - stuck between trying to be a "new age" guy, but still retain some qualities of a "Real Man" - be it Ward Cleaver or John Wayne.
> 
> But for the most part, I think our problems and issues match up fairly well with our female counterparts. We're all human - we all have issues - and both genders have very DIVERSE populations.


But these are the EXACT reasons why I both admire you and respect what you have to write. You absolutely think for yourself and do not pander to what others want from you while not being afraid to agree with them either if you do, in fact, agree. You do all this while trying to see both sides, always. Not to mention, you're actually funny. You've no idea how rare you are or the degree of your value but I'm not sure most women get it either.


----------



## SimplyAmorous

Brian. said:


> It's not that men are more likely to be violent against women, its that men are more likely to be violent against anybody.


I agree with this, one of the reasons is that men have 10 times more testosterone flowing through their veins, which is what brings out that raging aggression, but so many other influences as well (when you think about it , Football & extreme sports is a healthy outlet-likely keeping the crime rate down)...also how they are raised, heredity even, brain injuries are a huge factor, education, thier peers, drugs /alcohol, influence of other hormones out of whack in addition. 

Violence: the enduring problem - Alex Alvarez, Ronet Bachman - Google Books


Causes of Crime - Explaining Crime, Physical Abnormalities, Psychological Disorders, Social And Economic Factors, Broken Windows, Income And Education - JRank Articles

I am with you Catherine on violent crimes such as Rape & Sex Offenders - I am for personally Chemically castrating ALL Sex Offenders, it is a HUGE problem and I have zero mercy on any of them. 




> Scientists have observed the link between testosterone and aggression and concluded that high levels of testosterone correspond with increased violent and aggressive behavior in men (5). "It is the reason that stallions are high strung and impossible to train, the reason male dogs become vicious and start to bite people. It's why boys take chances and chase girls, why they drive too fast and deliberately start fights. In violent criminals, these tendencies are exaggerated and carried to extremes" (8). In an effort to stop male pedophiles, male child molesters have the option of being chemically castrated in some states. "Chemical castration is a term used to describe treatment with a drug called Depo-Provera that, when given to men, acts on the brain to inhibit hormones that stimulate the testicles to produce testosterone" (2). Depo-Provera is a common birth control pill that containing a synthetic version of the female hormone progesterone. Advocates of chemical castration hope that injections of Depo-Provera will prevent men from molesting children


 Chemical Castration: The Benefits and Disadvantages Intrinsic to Injecting Male Pedophiliacs with Depo-Provera | Serendip's Exchange

Debate here : Debate: Castration of sex offenders - Debatepedia 

I particularly do not care at all about "their rights", once found guilty, for this woman, they deserve zero mercy, I would prefer they never be let back into society. At the very least chemically castrating them.

I DO NOT however feel a 19 yr old who has sex with a WILLING 17 yr old girl should be on these sex offender lists at all. It is not the same thing or even comparable. I see no crime there, but 2 young people wanting to fool around, I don't feel the male is all to blame unless she was physically raped.

I feel women need to be taught from an early age thier effect on men, they are the weaker sex, not to entice , I feel they even have a greater responsibility to say "No", put on the brakes, knowing the way men's brains work in this area, all the more so. If we teach our girls this, they are less likely to get hurt by men. I feel WE set the bar, by how we dress, how we act, what we allow. Sure Guys take advantage of us, the are freaking horn dogs, but we don't have to let them. 

If We as women concentrate more on our "responsiblity" in these things -teaching our daughters to say NO, to act above the bar........and MEN concentrate more on teaching their sons to RESPECT women - instead of each sex blaming the other sex..... I feel this is the healtiest way to raise our kids to not make mistakes as they grow older. 

I would never teach my daughter she can go and & dress any way she pleases, g- string & all on the beach & near think the HORN DOGS are going to respect that, she has lowered her bar. To this mother, that is an advertisement she is looking to get laid. If that is what she wants to do, fine, but do not blame the man for coming on to her & possibly using her -if she gives in to that temptation. She had a hand in luring him -to expect him not to look and fantasize is acuaualy rather an insane request, as he would be going against his nature to resist feisting his eyes on that.

My older son is sitting here with me, we're talking, he just told me the new rave for some young girls is to dress like a "slu** on Halloween, one of them was talking to him the other day & she said " I love Halloween cause I can dress like a sl** without being one" - he just replied ...."that's retarted". He does feel however, we need to do away with Lada GaGa and these role models our girls see in the Media.

I don't know the answer. Just that as the stronger sex , us women have more of a responsibiity to not allow men to take advantage of us, it would STOP so much abuse, and so many of the problems Catherine talked about here. When a man RAPES and forces, it is completely a different matter or coarse -but to claim all of us women are helpless "victims" to all of men's lust. I simply can't go there.


----------



## Triumph

Brian. said:


> ...There seems to be a fad among guys to refer to themselves as nice guys, when really most of the time they're not. They might be passive,shy, doormats or whatever but that doesn't equate to being a genuine nice guy...


The term "Nice Guy" was coined by Danny Glover, writer of No More Mr. Nice Guy. It refers to a generation of males who think that by openly being doormats (or "Nice Guys" in their own eyes), women will fall madly deeply in love with them, when there actions actually cause such things as depression and sexless marriages. It isnt meant to be taken literally as "guys who are nice."


----------



## Halien

Catherine602 said:


> I did not like the things that were said by some of the men and not one man challenged the over the top comments. I will not be a nice girl and tell them nice things so they don't say evil things to me. I will say what I see in my eyes with out reference to what I should say to placate the haters so they don't call me a fat ugly ****, man- hater harpy. I dont care what they say, I define me. I have decided to draw a line in the sand - I will no longer silence my voice when men take the opportunity pillory women. I will answer the haters in kind.


Hopefully, we all choose our battles, based on some internal code we follow. I think we all know, though, when someone spews ignorace in a superficial thread, challenging loses its merit when many just choose to argue for the sake of arguing. 

Sometimes, its easy for me to see why women could have a very poor view of men, but it shows why most of us know that its a bad idea to challenge some of the basic mindsets. It quickly gets very ugly and personal. Yesterday, when I went to a video store, a middle aged guy returned a video where a store clerk had put the wrong one in a case. He seemed determind to make the woman behind the counter cry, as if this would somehow make things better for him. He argued that the time spent fixing her mistake was making him late to an event, and that a simple refund wasn't enough. Yet my own way of dealing with this only gave the clerk a similar bad view of us men. The guys seemed oblivious to why I was calling him Richard when I told him to lighten up, arguing that I must have mistaken him for someone else. When I explained that a common nickname for Richard was D1ck, I thought the woman behind the counter was going to pass out.


----------



## nice777guy

Triumph said:


> The term "Nice Guy" was coined by Danny Glover, writer of No More Mr. Nice Guy. It refers to a generation of males who think that by openly being doormats (or "Nice Guys" in their own eyes), women will fall madly deeply in love with them, when there actions actually cause such things as depression and sexless marriages. It isnt meant to be taken literally as "guys who are nice."


Yes - thank you for the clarification.

Most guys here who have spent much time in the Men's lounge are aware of what a "Nice Guy" is. I use caps and quotes when referring to it in this context.


----------



## nice777guy

Trenton said:


> But these are the EXACT reasons why I both admire you and respect what you have to write. You absolutely think for yourself and do not pander to what others want from you while not being afraid to agree with them either if you do, in fact, agree. You do all this while trying to see both sides, always. Not to mention, you're actually funny. You've no idea how rare you are or the degree of your value *but I'm not sure most women get it either*.


Thank you for the kind words. But at the end of the day - I'm really just trying to be myself.

Although this is a step down from the post where you proposed to me. Are we drifting apart?

Maybe that's why we have a 50% divorce rate - people wearing masks that eventually have to come off.

Not sure what it means - but the difference in tone between "this" thread and the one in the Men's clubhouse - fascinating!


----------



## SimplyAmorous

nice777guy said:


> I think there are many Nice Guys who are living perfectly great lives with the "right" kind of woman. I feel like trying to do some of the things that have been suggested to me on this board would be the equivalent of putting on a mask. Much of it would be a temporary fix.


To this I say a hearty AMEN. My husband is a *GENUINE *NICE MAN. Although he could be more ASSERTIVE at times, I am NOT going to change who he is - although I did try for a time, clammering for more Aggression out of him.

Us women have a HUGE role in loving and accepting the temperment of the man we have chosen. This I have done. 

What is :rofl: as all get out about my husband is this...I even bought "No More Mr Nice Guy" we read pages together, he learned where he was going wrong in some areas, how he should have given me SOME LIP, told me what for, even treated me a little colder to wake me up if necessary, stomp on some of that passivity of his ........and I asked him one day...."Ok you know how you have screwed up in the past - how you could have gotten more sex even ...looking back , if we could live our lives over again, would you have done things differently-now that you know "....... 

and his answer.....


he says "NO, I still couldn't do that to you". I was like .."WHAT !!!!" See, taking the nice man that he is, he still would have done it all the same, loving me like mad , even in the midst of not getting his needs met. What he H can I do with that. No hope for the man. 

He IS who he is. How can I yell at him for loving too much, that would make me a little insane, now wouldn't it!


----------



## RECHTSANWALT

Brian. said:


> Men target other men alot more often than women and children, so it would be wrong to say "all directed towards".


A very large number of men get raped by other men in parts of Africa affected by civil wars. The numbers are comparable to women. Unfortunately, it doesn't get reported or addressed because the women's bodies (with the UN) believe it would take away from the fixed funding they receive.


----------



## YupItsMe

Catherine602 said:


> not one man challenged the over the top comments


Thats total bull****. Read Post #43 for one. I think most of whats over there is crap. One pansy **** his diaper after he miscontrued over half of what I said before he got sarcastic and rolled his eyes like little girl. 

The other one is so lame, boring and crazy, throwing outrageous bombs of nonsense, I cant bring myself to dignify him with a serious response. Its a total waste of energy to drag an idiot from that far back to reality.

Much of the rest of your post is way too long to enjoy so I was forced to skim it only but my general impression is you overgeneralize about men this, men that, just like the moron in the mens lounge overgeneralizing his opinion about women. 

Here is, in a nut shell, what well adjusted, sane women without baggage or mental disorders generally think about men and what well adjusted, sane men without baggage or mental disorders generally men think about women. 

If they lack self esteem, life skills, fail to demonstrate some level of responsibility to others to live up to their promises and contributiuons that are fairly expected of them, or they are suffering from a mental illness, intolerable eccentricities, an overabundance of other baggage, or an addiction, they are entirely disappointing.

In the exclusion of those fairly common circumstances, men and women largely enjoy one anothers company as they rather cheerfully follow the golden rule or gently explain in a particular circumstance why they can not.


----------



## nice777guy

Catherine602 said:


> I am nothing like Ian. I am reactionary and lash out at times when I feel that women or men are being treated unfairly. Most of the time I gloss over the post of Ian but, what little I read deeply disturbs me. My father was like him, he thought he had the right to rule the household and was very self-centered. He had little respect for women and my mother suffered for his lack of regard. I am concerned that some men may actually think that it is OK to treat women like maliable pawns and as conduits to get their need met or else.
> 
> The dislike of women, the arrogance and condisension is sickening to me. The advice is always the same. Nothing is nuanced or made applicable to the problem at hand. Women are to be told what a man's needs are and commanded to heal. That does not work. I know women, and I know how they work. I have seen men like Ian in action. They are actually easier to make a fool than they will ever know.
> 
> Their bombast is air and water no substance. They just need to hear "you have the biggest and the best babe" to placate them. Then their women do what they want by cleaver maneuvers. They are rigid, insecure men and because they lack flexibility, they can't imagine that the appearance of capitulation may a subtle game on them.
> 
> There are as many if not more not so nice guys who have troubled relationships and they would be helped by becoming more compassionate, sensitive and flexible. I think some of the advice nice guys get is appropriate especially when it pertains to boundaries. Anyone who allows themselves to be negated needs to man up or women up. Some of us have is married to nice guys.
> 
> There are nice guys who have managed to strike a balance that seems just right, flexibility with firm leadership - MEM, Conrad, BBW, Halien, you A and Deego (he plays it close to the chest though) just to name a few. They don't post enough in my opinion
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Ian - like you - and whether you like him or not - has done his homework on most of what he speaks. And he speaks with passion and conviction. Hence - the comparison.

The men you mention - they used to post a lot more. But their ideas still met a lot of resistance - largely from women who were hanging out in the men's clubhouse! I don't mind the debate - but a lot of it became very repetitive.

And yes - I look back and think that I'm here largely due to my wife's problems. Over the years I see where I did things for the wrong reasons - compromised my own needs in order to keep the peace - and that doing so built up some resent inside of me. But right now there really isn't much peace any more unless we are apart. She certainly wouldn't tell you now "nice" I am - and I'm perfectly fine with that. She's bad judge of character!


----------



## that_girl

Why should we be bitter and rude about men if we don't feel that way about men in general  If you want to be lame like the other post, then post away! No one is stopping you.

I like most men. Yes, there are douches and whatnot...but so what? I know more b1tchy women than I do horrible men.

I didn't think this thread needed to go in the direction that the other one did. I was not offended by the other thread because I know I'm not a bad woman  I do know many bad women though--- so I see the generalization there.


----------



## nice777guy

that_girl said:


> Why should we be bitter and rude about men if we don't feel that way about men in general  If you want to be lame like the other post, then post away! No one is stopping you.
> 
> I like most men. Yes, there are douches and whatnot...but so what? I know more b1tchy women than I do horrible men.
> 
> I didn't think this thread needed to go in the direction that the other one did. I was not offended by the other thread because I know I'm not a bad woman  I do know many bad women though--- so I see the generalization there.


Sorry - who mentioned "bitter and rude"??? Just wondering - Linda!


----------



## that_girl

nice777guy said:


> Sorry - who mentioned "bitter and rude"??? Just wondering - Linda!


A woman in this thread wrote how we weren't making this thread like the other in the Men's Clubhouse.

She was writing the truth about how that post became. I just put in bitter and rude because that's how I saw the other post lollll...since they were being compared.


----------



## nice777guy

that_girl said:


> A woman in this thread wrote how we weren't making this thread like the other in the Men's Clubhouse.
> 
> She was writing the truth about how that post became. I just put in bitter and rude because that's how I saw the other post lollll...since they were being compared.


Yes - it was much more "lively" in the other room.


----------



## that_girl

lol You say "lively", I say "nonsense".


----------



## SimplyAmorous

that_girl said:


> I like most men. Yes, there are douches and whatnot...but so what? I know more b1tchy women than I do horrible men.


This is how I feel also. I accually held myself back from posting my husbands thoughts on that other thread about "What do men REALLY think of women?" , I asked him this the other night and well, it wasn't pretty (of coarse he doesn't mean all -just as Catherine didn't either), but women would have been in an uproar had I posted it. 

I have been hurt in my life by nasty women 10 times more than men. The majority of men are wonderful. 

To Catherines credit, she did say 99.99% she admires because they abhor evil. So that bad was only 1% - I would agree with that statistic .


----------



## that_girl

Oh I have nothing against anyone who has posted in these threads. People can have opinions. I don't get offended unless the opinions are straightup lies.

 I have no weird thought on men. No deep seeded issues with men. No hatred towards men. lol. I do, however, have those feelings towards many women. Well, not hatred, but severe distrust.


----------



## nice777guy

SimplyAmorous said:


> To this I say a hearty AMEN. My husband is a *GENUINE *NICE MAN. Although he could be more ASSERTIVE at times, I am NOT going to change who he is - although I did try for a time, clammering for more Aggression out of him.
> 
> Us women have a HUGE role in loving and accepting the temperment of the man we have chosen. This I have done.
> 
> What is :rofl: as all get out about my husband is this...I even bought "No More Mr Nice Guy" we read pages together, he learned where he was going wrong in some areas, how he should have given me SOME LIP, told me what for, even treated me a little colder to wake me up if necessary, stomp on some of that passivity of his ........and I asked him one day...."Ok you know how you have screwed up in the past - how you could have gotten more sex even ...looking back , if we could live our lives over again, would you have done things differently-now that you know ".......
> 
> and his answer.....
> 
> 
> he says "NO, I still couldn't do that to you". I was like .."WHAT !!!!" See, taking the nice man that he is, he still would have done it all the same, loving me like mad , even in the midst of not getting his needs met. What he H can I do with that. No hope for the man.
> 
> He IS who he is. How can I yell at him for loving too much, that would make me a little insane, now wouldn't it!


SA - your relationship seems to be the perfect example of what the Nice Guy theory excludes. That all women are not the same! The theory doesn't account for strong women who don't have some need to be "taken in hand." (not sure if I said that right, but its close enough for a message board).

And best of all - your example - your Husband isn't on here - on this board - searching for "answers" about himself. By all accounts, you have a wonderful, successful marriage. Your husband sounds perfectly content with who he is. And - even better - you are completely in love with him!

Nice guys don't always finish last...


----------



## AFEH

nice777guy said:


> SA - your relationship seems to be the perfect example of what the Nice Guy theory excludes. That all women are not the same! The theory doesn't account for strong women who don't have some need to be "taken in hand." (not sure if I said that right, but its close enough for a message board).
> 
> And best of all - your example - your Husband isn't on here - on this board - searching for "answers" about himself. By all accounts, you have a wonderful, successful marriage. Your husband sounds perfectly content with who he is. And - even better - you are completely in love with him!
> 
> Nice guys don't always finish last...


Absolutely spot on! It’s that SA is NOT abusing her husband’s “niceness”. She knows what she has in him and treasures that. And it’s an absolute delight to see. 

But the Nice Guy does need, at least in my mind, to step up to the mark (Man Up) when he finds he IS being abused by his wife. Why? Because all being nice gets him is more of the same abuse!

And anybody who has a go at a Nice Guy like some of the women in this thread have done should leave venting their spleen for the Bad Guys in the world.


----------



## AFEH

Brian. said:


> I had a go at nice guys, and I'm not a woman.
> 
> REAL genuine nice guys don't need to proclaim that they are nice guys.
> 
> "nice guys" are really not actual nice guys, they tend to be bitter and passive-aggresive with poor self esteem and pat themselves on the back and call themselves nice guys so they can feel better about themselves. Its a self flattering act.
> 
> Being a doormat doesn't equate to being a nice guy.
> 
> I know real genuine good guys(nice guys), and these self proclaimed nice guys don't come close to being like that.


I was married to a Nice Woman for an exceptionally long time. For me there’s not a lot of difference between Nice Guy and Nice Woman, apart from the obvious. She had phenomenal qualities as do the Nice Guys. You just got to know what you have in your hands, how to appreciate them and how to look after them.

We all come with our own kaleidoscope of colours, project our own light and our own shade. There are no exceptions. You will have your dark side as well as your light and your colours. But I will say there are an immense amount of worse things to be in the world than a Nice Guy.


----------



## Trenton

nice777guy said:


> Thank you for the kind words. But at the end of the day - I'm really just trying to be myself.
> 
> Although this is a step down from the post where you proposed to me. Are we drifting apart?
> 
> Maybe that's why we have a 50% divorce rate - people wearing masks that eventually have to come off.
> 
> Not sure what it means - but the difference in tone between "this" thread and the one in the Men's clubhouse - fascinating!


Authenticity is not as valued in our society as it should be. When I went to training for my current job they kept stressing "authenticity of character" as crucial to our success in our positions. I remember the teacher telling us that it sounds like it's an easy thing to do but that without practice you'll forget how to be you. Seemed like a crazy thought.

...and yeah, I feel we are drifting apart. You're not meeting my needs being so far away and such. Long distance relationships are hard to maintain. You better send out a pining love letter soon...

Marriage is about compromise and I think often we marry because of how someone makes us feel at a time when we think we very well might live forever. Then life actually happens and we re-evaluate.

I think I am sometimes in awe of men. I really fancy them and sometimes wish I was more like them. They seem in a generalized way very simple in their needs and dealings although I think they often times dismiss women because they don't understand us and have to dismiss in order to compartmentalize us in their lives. I think men are more predictable even though women tend to be predictable in their lack of predictability.

Men are my opposite and I can really marvel at that and also find I struggle to understand it. Their physical strength is also something I value. I wish they didn't have to be ruled by their egos and gave themselves more credit in places where credit is do and less credit in places where credit is not do (like in their understanding of how women should feel/act/behave).

I think men can't grasp that as a woman I do not see myself as a sexual creature. I more or less see that being sexual/wearing certain clothing/hair/etc. prompts attention from men that I want but I don't want it to be everything because it's only a small part of me. It's hard to not use this knowledge against men because of how absurd it is to me, and again, I don't know that men can understand this just as I can't understand or begin to grasp checking every man out physically as a default setting.

Of course everything I'm saying is completely generalized and from my own experience. I'm sure it is not the case for some women/men.


----------



## nice777guy

Brian. said:


> Theres a difference between being a genuine nice guy.
> 
> And those self proclaimed "nice guys" who just call themselves that to flatter themselves when they are really the opposite of being actual nice guys.
> 
> A genuine nice good guy don't need to say he is one.


Brian - do some reading in the Men's Clubhouse.

I've been here two years now I think. In that time, the phrase "Nice Guy" - in caps - with quotes - has taken on its own life - largely based on the NMMNG book by Glover. If anyone around here proclaims to be a "Nice Guy" - they are actually asking for help - and not trying to brag!

I think the real "Nice Guy" debate is more about how to stop yourself from sabotaging relationships. Not everyone agrees on how much a person should adjust their behavior and exactly how to go about becoming a better man.


----------



## Trenton

that_girl said:


> Oh I have nothing against anyone who has posted in these threads. People can have opinions. I don't get offended unless the opinions are straightup lies.
> 
> I have no weird thought on men. No deep seeded issues with men. No hatred towards men. lol. I do, however, have those feelings towards many women. Well, not hatred, but severe distrust.


I think many women (myself and Catherine included) have faced sexual abuse as an issue in our lives that was at the hands of a man. When this happens to either gender (and it happens to 1 in every 4 girls/women) there are obviously issues faced in regards to men. I understand that all (even most) men aren't like men who do this but I also understand that promoting certain stereotypes and untruths about women mistakenly justifies these types of abuses.

It's kind and respectful of both men and women to understand this. It also doesn't undervalue the points being made. When either men or women uphold the devaluing of women it turns my stomach. First, because I care about all others on a basic level and second because it's as unfair as undervaluing men simply because they are men.

Of course, there's always room for humor.


----------



## AFEH

Acorn said:


> In the other thread, Catherine said "These responses are more about the men themselves nothing about what men think about women.", and therefore I'm choosing to go with her post as her opening up to what she believes rather than any referendum on the male gender. Her post is her view. Her glasses are only tainted in that they are not the same shade as yours.
> 
> You and I are perfectly capable of going over to the other thread and deciding for ourselves whether the posts were as bad as she thought they were, and forming opinions from there, but Catherine cannot be wrong if that's what she feels. The thread did ask for her opinion, after all.


I see Catherine as an intelligent and very articulate woman. One of the most articulate here. She posts with a lot of feeling and I feel absolutely certain she will answer for herself if she has a mind to. I certainly feel no need to mollycoddle or overprotect her. Most especially as she is a feminist woman who has a need to make her point. It’s just that I for one take issue with that point. But I could be wrong. But if women are free to fling out false accusations against men then the world will surely be a terrible place for all to live in. I think they should not be allowed to throw out false accusations in TAM, let alone in the world outside.


----------



## nice777guy

AFEH said:


> I see Catherine as an intelligent and very articulate woman. One of the most articulate here. She posts with a lot of feeling and I feel absolutely certain she will answer for herself if she has a mind to. I certainly feel no need to mollycoddle or overprotect her. Most especially as she is a feminist woman who has a need to make her point. It’s just that I for one take issue with that point. But I could be wrong. But if women are free to fling out false accusations against men then the world will surely be a terrible place for all to live in. I think they should not be allowed to throw out false accusations in TAM, let alone in the world outside.


Good luck with that! On person's false accusation is often another person's opinion.


----------



## Runs like Dog

Don't know and don't care. Know what's the two best ways to get in an argument with a woman? Agree with her or disagree with her. Either way.


----------



## okeydokie

i also do not really care. most if not all men i know probably wouldnt care either.


----------



## Lon

Triumph said:


> The term "Nice Guy" was coined by Danny Glover, writer of No More Mr. Nice Guy. It refers to a generation of males who think that by openly being doormats (or "Nice Guys" in their own eyes), women will fall madly deeply in love with them, when there actions actually cause such things as depression and sexless marriages. It isnt meant to be taken literally as "guys who are nice."


Yeah this is the nice guy that I was referring to, although even Glover writes that there are two types: the "I'm so good" type (like I was) who at their core don't believe they are worthy, but can overcome it by doing good things and repressing their flaws, and the "I'm so bad" kind who believe they are inherently bad and the only way around is to put on a nice guy persona (my Brother fits into that category).

And by the way, Danny Glover is an actor, Robert Glover is the author of the book. (and I'd give credit to "coining" the term to Alice Cooper.  )


----------



## Therealbrighteyes

Lon said:


> And by the way, Danny Glover is an actor, Robert Glover is the author of the book. (and I'd give credit to "coining" the term to Alice Cooper.  )


In the words of the actor "I'm gettin' too old for this $hit".

Bottom line, be in awe of yourself. Stop worrying what the opposite sex thinks of you.


----------



## Triumph

Lon said:


> Yeah this is the nice guy that I was referring to, although even Glover writes that there are two types: the "I'm so good" type (like I was) who at their core don't believe they are worthy, but can overcome it by doing good things and repressing their flaws, and the "I'm so bad" kind who believe they are inherently bad and the only way around is to put on a nice guy persona (my Brother fits into that category).
> 
> And by the way, Danny Glover is an actor, Robert Glover is the author of the book. (and I'd give credit to "coining" the term to Alice Cooper.  )


I like my version better. 

Old black man sitting in front of his computer typing away on nice guy syndrome, silently reminiscing about his machismo days of chasing Predator through the city. 

*This is the man I want to take advice from!*


----------



## Lon

Triumph said:


> I like my version better.
> 
> Old black man sitting in front of his computer typing away on nice guy syndrome, silently reminiscing about his machismo days of chasing Predator through the city.
> 
> *This is the man I want to take advice from!*


When I picture him sitting, it's on a toilet that has a pressure-switch rigged to a bomb, that he only found out about when he went for some TP. (a la lethal weapon)!


----------



## southbound

SimplyAmorous said:


> I appreciate Men.
> 
> In my lifetime, pretty nearing from toddlerhood, to my parents, to relatives , to even my friendships today, if I had to compare ....MEN have been kinder to me over women in my life -by a long shot. I have never cared for the pettiness of women, the backbiting, even I seem to offend them , men are more gracious, more forgiving, more understanding. It has always been MY experience. So I speak out of it- I guess.
> 
> Even as a toddler, I consider my bestest friend to have been a neighborhood boy -I just liked him better -he was more fun, I didn't want to play with dolls. He taught me how to ride my bike, we climbed trees together, and buried my mom's jewelry, Then he moved away, little girl me missed him very much.
> 
> I am sure it helps I have never let a man use me, abuse me in romantic relationships, I always put the brake on. I married correctly, and I hold firm boundaries with the men in my life. Living in a house full of testosterone, reading endless books on boys, men, I understand them well, and love & appreciate many of their ways. Even if they are more mysterious, even back offish in comparison to women.
> 
> My answers here are more a reflection on the Old Fashioned type man.... the Good, responsible ones....who want to PROVIDE, live to PROTECT, live to give pleasure, caring more about the woman's sometimes more than his own- how beautiful is that, if you have one like this. I love their sacrifice in war, bravery unto death. I would NOT be so brave.
> 
> I look to men as a comfort, the physcially stronger to Sheild us, how on the Titanic, women went 1st in those row boats. This is a Good man's belief system towards us women, the weaker physically. Though men are weaken in the Sexual sense and we need to PROVIDE here willingly to show our respect & love for them --our role as women.
> 
> I LOVE how they will readily help a woman in near anything, if they see her stranded beside the road, open a door for her, pick up her books, Gentlemen ROCK!
> 
> I love a sensitive man , but strong minded at the same time. Stable, not seeking to impress but just BE. A quiet confidence is so attractive TO ME. A loud obknoxious drunk would be VILE, or a Bragging athlete to how many women he can get in bed.
> 
> I love how FUNNY men are- when they are just being themselves, not even trying to make us laugh- women can not compare. When I was in 2nd grade, the teachers had to literally put me outside of the classroom cause I could not stop laughing at these 2 boys, I was disrupting the whole class. Been laughing ever since. :rofl:
> 
> I love how men are assertive, they tell it like it is, no Bullshi**, I always find it rather amusing how women can never handle their honesty -- but I see it as a HUGE plus. I love how laid back they are in comparison to women, not so worried about "Proper etiquette", I alwyas find it amusing how they don't care how dishelved they look, how dirty they smell, sometimes like Dogs, --how they almost NEED a woman to straighten them out, how if they live alone, their fridge is empty, no decorations on the wall, clearly they need a woman's touch. We can do so much for them! They are almost lost without us!
> 
> I love how they genuinelly want to FIX things, I like this, but where they go wrong is not listening to their women's *feelings *before they do all this FIXING. Women are generallly a little better listeners. Comforters even.
> 
> *Some things I don't like*...thier LUST for sports, some of them are near insane when they get around some football fans. Their LUST for computer Games , I don't get it, games bore me to tears.
> 
> How they can not stop and ask for directions when they are clearly in a pickle, I find this very silly - as a woman.
> 
> Men who need inordinate amounts of time in thier Cave, lots of personal space, I know how NORMAL this is for the majority of men, but it's not a trait I particularly care for . My husband is different for some reason - I love that he escaped this need.
> 
> I wouldn't want the Work a holics male-where thier family, homelife is clearly behind the ladder of worldly success -feeling this is thier contribution-what more do you want attitude- to thier lonely wives. I'd rather live mediorce , struggle a little and be romantically entangled , I prefer a more needy emotional man -if that makes sense. NOt one so independent, he could happily live without me.
> 
> I appreciate the sexual side of Men. The way God designed them. It doesn't bother me personally that men are visual creatures, even my own husband. How boring it would be to take this DRIVE from man. It would emasculate them somehow. To those who choose to respectfully & responsibly restrain, sure he LOOKS, but he would never touch, USE -controls his lusts and is only devoted hopelessly to one woman, these are the finest of men. God help women to understand them.
> 
> For those who struggle to keep it in thier pants, going crazy wanting "variety", this is not a good thing at all - this is infact a curse. ONe of the bigger problems men struggle with. Not one of their better traits . Though too high of Test is at the root.
> 
> ..... A man who keeps himself from addictions by right living....where character is more important that the world's riches or climbing ladders of worldly success.... can love ONE woman passionately for his entire lifetime.....who finds his destiny in Providing & protecting his family.... where his children will look up to him with admiration on how he raised them, being that manly example...... his wife feeling he IS the "wing beneath her wings".... now there is a REAL man, the type I admire... I count my husband one of these.


If I ever meet a single woman who thinks like you, she will be clawing to get me.:rofl: Without addressing every point, I will just say that all the things you like describes me, and all the things you dislike, with one exception, are not like me. The one exception is that i do need some "me" time. Computer games also bore me to tears, and I don't lust after sports. I don't even know most players by name, unless they are hugely popular like Michael Jackson, or is it Michael Jordan?:rofl:


----------



## Runs like Dog

What do women think about men?

The odds are, nothing. Nothing at all.


----------



## Laurae1967

Well, this woman thinks that men run the gamut. I've met men who are so insecure that they act like they are "all that" and a bag of chips to puff up their ego when in reality they are nothing special. I've met men who are so threatened by women that they put them down and treat them in a condescending way. But those are the exception. The majority of men I know and have met believe women have just as much to offer the world as men do, believe in equal rights, and are happy to be involved with child rearing and are willing to share household responsibilities, and view their wives as equal partners. 

I think men process emotions differently than women, in general. I think men don't want to talk about things as much as women do. I think men want love and tenderness just as much as women do.

I think men still feel like what they acheive/do is a big part of what defines them and I think women still feel like their relationships define them (although I'm not saying their careers are not important because clearly they are. In fact, more women work now than men!).

I wish I could find a way to insert some comments about PORN but for whatever reason, that didn't enter my mind when thinking about what I think of me. I guess that says something.


----------



## SimplyAmorous

southbound said:


> If I ever meet a single woman who thinks like you, she will be clawing to get me.:rofl: Without addressing every point, I will just say that all the things you like describes me, and all the things you dislike, with one exception, are not like me. The one exception is that i do need some "me" time. Computer games also bore me to tears, and I don't lust after sports. I don't even know most players by name, unless they are hugely popular like Michael Jackson, or is it Michael Jordan?:rofl:


Ha ha ,even I know it is Michael Jordon but you know how bad I am, I don't even know what sport he is in - I think I heard more about his sexual exploits in the past than what he played, of coarse that was more interesting anyway. 

Here is the thing Southbound.... I know YOU wouldn't like that "CLAWING", cause you like an Old fashioned type woman. And really the Old Fashioned type would abhor the need to "CLAW" for a man . I KNOW I would... I would find it very demeaning in fact - even if I did have my eye on one I liked, I wouldn't go there. 

We need these GOOD MEN to show some HEALTHY demonstration they WANT US, they are seeking a relationship with us. Without that, it sucks the life right out of the Romance. After that, however, we can let our hair down and feel confident we have truly found something Good, even get a little crazy on our pursuer. 

Keep this in mind if you ever come across a nice lady you are interested in, cause although she may be truly interested in you, getting her claws out probably won't be "her thing".... Don't let her slip through your fingers, put yourself out there.


----------



## LadyGemma

Men are interesting creatures, i think each person has an inner beauty and i also like to know a lot about their background and past etc before trying to connect with them on a close friendship level. I tend to enjoy analysing why they act certain ways and why they do the things they do, it helps me understand they more as a person and sometimes when they do stupid things, it helps me understand why and also decreases my anger/ upset towards them, which i find comes in handy =)


----------

