# To Be Raised in the Christian Faith ????????



## Mike188 (Dec 29, 2009)

My wife just sent me a new settlement proposal. She is slowly coming around to my terms, but for whatever reason she (or her mother) felt the need to add:

"9. The children will be raised in the Christian faith".

Is this normal? Can one parent dictate what faith the children will be raised in? Really I don't care what she does with them on her time (within reason, of course). She can take them to church once on Wednesday and twice on Sunday if she wants to, but will this require me to do anything or be proactive in any way? How is something like this even enforced? What if my way of worshiping is to watch Benny Hinn videos on YouTube?

Seriously, is this something that is commonly inserted into a divorce settlement?


----------



## skylar5 (Oct 19, 2011)

I know this because I am going through a similar situation and courts in Texas seperate church and state. Meaning that I can't control my daughters religious upbringing when she is with her father.
Because I think he is with a heretic, Jezabel herself and both of them lack all morals and values...I do not want him training my daughter to have the same. We got around that by changing the visitation days to where he never has my child on Wed or Sundays and eliminating the chance that he could possibly take an active role in religion.:smthumbup:


----------



## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

I am dare sure Mike188 is nothing like your ex and Jezabel. Of coarse , his "Christian" wife is the one who has trampled on thier marriage by having continuous secret online conversations with various male co-workers, denying him access to her FB, changing passwords, lives on her phone , quit going to Counseling when he remained & SHE wanted this divorce. And all along he has remained faithful wanting to make it work.

Not all Christians are created equal, nor should all "heretics" be looked upon as unrespectable bad parents. 


Given this country was founded on the Separation of Church and State, I seriously doubt this can be enforced. 


Child Custody and Religion in a Florida Divorce


----------



## Mike188 (Dec 29, 2009)

My marriage counselor (who is a Baptist and considers herself to be a Christian counselor) doesn't consider me to be a heretic. I have sat across from her every Friday afternoon for two years and poured my heart out to her. If there is anyone out there who really knows how I feel deep inside it would be her. She still holds out hope that I will eventually come back to having faith some day. Unfortunately my wife and my MIL have all but trampled it out of me. If I described everything that they have done would people would be amazed that they still call themselves Christians.

I just blows me away that they can put something like this in a proposal when they are the least Godly people I have ever met. Total phony hypocrites. Even my Christian marriage counselor is blown away at what my wife does yet still considers herself a Christian. 

It just pisses me off that she can do what she has done, screw around with other guys, destroy our marriage, done things to potentially destroy the marriages of some of her male co-workers, completely neglect her children and then push this in my face like she is somehow morally superior to me. 

This latest proposal was obviously written by her mother (a Methodist minister) because it wasn't her words and was filled with hateful little jabs. It was obviously written by someone who was a very bitter, hateful person. That would be her mother. And my MIL doesn't approve of my marriage counselor because my MC is a Baptist and she thinks that the Baptists take the Bible too literally, therefore my MC may be screwing up my head. My MC thinks my wife and MIL have completely lost touch with what it means to be a Christian. Can you see now why I just want to step back from religion for a while and take a break and sort out my head and how this demand added to the settlement proposal is so laughable?


----------



## tacoma (May 1, 2011)

Well I am a heretic and being one leads me to all kinds of info about this stuff.

You can leave the clause in the paperwork as it can`t possibly be enforced in this country.

You have the right to expose your child to any faith you want or no faith at all as does your Ex.


----------



## Ten_year_hubby (Jun 24, 2010)

Mike188 said:


> My wife just sent me a new settlement proposal. She is slowly coming around to my terms, but for whatever reason she (or her mother) felt the need to add:
> 
> "9. The children will be raised in the Christian faith".
> 
> ...


Just don't convert them (or yourself) to a non-Christian religion and you should be OK. And no devil worship


----------



## Mike188 (Dec 29, 2009)

Ten_year_hubby said:


> Just don't convert them (or yourself) to a non-Christian religion and you should be OK. And no devil worship



Yes, but why should I even agree to that? I talked to my marriage counselor about it today, she is a Baptist. She said that it isn't up to us what faith our children follow and that putting that in a divorce decree is meaningless. She also doesn't think to much of my wife's "religiousness".


----------



## tacoma (May 1, 2011)

Mike188 said:


> Yes, but why should I even agree to that?


Because as your marraige counselor has stated....



> She said that it isn't up to us what faith our children follow and that *putting that in a divorce decree is meaningless.*


AND.... you are probably going to have more than enough problems going through this process so my advice would be to just let it slide since it is indeed meaningless.
Concentrate on what matters.

Now, that said, I can`t argue if you do push the issue over principle because doing that kind of thing seems to be my downfall as well.


----------



## aug (Aug 21, 2011)

If it is in the agreement, it may mean something legally somewhere, somehow.

But, consider she's doing the adultery thing, it would kind of hard for her to have any moral force behind her demand to have the clause included. Every time she brings it up, just laugh. Eventually the irony will sink in.


----------



## Mike188 (Dec 29, 2009)

aug said:


> If it is in the agreement, it may mean something legally somewhere, somehow.
> 
> But, consider she's doing the adultery thing, it would kind of hard for her to have any moral force behind her demand to have the clause included. Every time she brings it up, just laugh. Eventually the irony will sink in.


Oh I have pointed out the irony of it a few times. It kind of deflated her. she told me that she didn't want me to be Buddhist one month, Jewish the next month, Hindu the next month, etc. I asked her if I had a habit of jumping around to religions (I don't). 

I think her mom added that because she is holier-than-thou (unless it has to do with her cheating daughter) and she is mad at me. There is a woman on my FB page (not a friend - a fan page) who is a spiritual coach/energy reader/etc. She is a Pagan and it infuriates my wife. I called the woman once an got a 30 minute reading, told her my problems, etc. It was a half price special for a 30 minute phone session for $15 and I had read some reviews about her saying that she was very insightful. I'm not really into that kind of psychic stuff but I gave it a shot anyway.

I don't know if she has any psychic ability or not, but she was extremely insightful and helpful. She condensed about 6 months of marriage counseling into 30 minutes. If nothing else she would make a very good counselor. That's what I took away from it. Nothing evil or dark sided. No belief in the supernatural or anything like that. I'm a pretty normal level headed guy. Of course my wife thinks that's bad stuff and was threatened by it. 

Other than that I have been to obedient spouse and gone to church every Sunday fro years (haha look where it got me).


----------

