# I want more sex them him WTF help please!!!



## cklg88 (Sep 28, 2010)

First off this is my first time posting here. I’m hoping that other women have this problem and that some men will shed some light on how to fix it. K here goes… Me and my husband have been married for a little over a year. At first we had sex two or three times a week. After I got pregnant it slowed down to once a week. I figured it would go back to normal after the baby was born well he is now two and it is still the same. I know that it is usually the guy complaining that they don’t get enough sex. Is there other women out there that have this problem. Or how about guys that have this problem and what could your wife do to make you want it more? I know he is not cheating. Also I have heard that men loose some of there sex drive when they hit there 30’s is this true (he is 33). Please help me!!!


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## toolate (Sep 22, 2009)

I have also heard from some men that after seeing their wives give birth they have trouble seeing them as sexual. This is definitely NOT all men's experience by any means, but I have heard that. I am interested in the answers here as well bc IF husband and I have a child I will probably face the same thing.


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## cklg88 (Sep 28, 2010)

We both have other children and i had a c-sectoin. I would not let that stop you from having kids they are the love of my life!!!


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## misspuppy (Sep 19, 2010)

man, when i met my hubby we were like rabbits lol, doing it all the time day in and day out. we met when we were in our late 20's, im now 35 and he is 37, and yes, over time, it does get less, especially after a child, even tho the child is 2 yrs old, sometimes, it takes a man a while to adjust. i am currently 16 weeks pregnant, i would say over the last few months his sex drive as done some weird things.. believe it or not, his sex drives up and down based on the season.  im not kidding, in the winter, he wants MORE, in the summer he wants less ( hot vs cold) and in between it is on and off.. 

anyways, i ALWAYS want sex, man i live for sex, i love sex, when he is not around i "have alone time" and masturbate, use toys or what not, it does not bother him because he knows how horny i can get. 

i would say that it is normal what he is going thru, and he will come around, maybe it has something to do with having a child, and since the rolls change ( from sexy yum yum wifey to mommy and feeding), it may just take a little more work... i asked my hubby and he said "wear more revealing tops ( he is a booby man and i am a 36d), he says " i know what is down there, but, imma UP there kind of man.. so, i do, and tada, sex life fixed lol..

just ask him what he would like to see, and see what he says. and then work with it. men are very weird creatures, and they need visual aids to help them get excited, so try it and see.


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## Crazytown (Sep 27, 2010)

My H sure didn't lose his sex drive in his 30's. He's in his 40's and once per day is not enough!!!

I think the above posters are correct. It's probably a phase and he'll get back in his groove soon.
Also, dressing up never hurt anyone. 
What if you put on some sexy lingerie and waited for him in the bed at night? He couldn't turn THAT down, right? try it...


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

Probably a stupid queston, but, does he know you want more sex? Are you initiating and he's turning you down? At some point during the pregnancy, he got the red light. I wonder if he really understands it's back to green, now. Was this a planned pregnancy or something that caught him by surprise? If he's afraid of getting you pregnant again, that might explain some of it. 
I'm 49 but I don't know what it feels like to not want sex at all. Whether I'm sick, tired, angry, busy, or whatever, if my wife wants sex, she knows very well how to get it from me. I expect you know how, too. Guys in their natural condition are horndogs. Making a guy horny is usually about as difficult as making water wet.


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## cklg88 (Sep 28, 2010)

Yes i have told him many times. He says he will try and sometimes he does but i feel like my H should not have to try to want to have sex with me. Then it makes me feel worse cause i wonder what is wrong with me. He tells me nothing is wrong with me and i get no answer to way he wants it less.


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## cklg88 (Sep 28, 2010)

Oh ya and no he does not tell me no if i go after it. I guess i just start to feel inscure that he wont start it. And yes the baby was planned and i got fixed so no more babies for us


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## chingchang (Sep 21, 2010)

cklg88 said:


> Oh ya and no he does not tell me no if i go after it. I guess i just start to feel inscure that he wont start it. And yes the baby was planned and i got fixed so no more babies for us


There could be all kinds of reasons why. Does he have a stressful job? Does he get enough sleep? Does he have a healthy diet? Does he smoke? Does he put a lot of energy into the baby? Is he on meds? BTW...I'm in my 30s and I think my sex drive is higher now than in my 20s. 

CC


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## ku1980rose (Sep 7, 2010)

My H is in his 30's and he acts the same way and we are newly married. I think he has a higher sex drive than he lets on. I've talked to him and I've told him that if he wants it, I'm ready. But, he still can't seem to initiate. I don't know if it is a lower sex drive (and not willing to admit it) or that he is insecure or what. But it seems guys are not always as good about talking about it....especially when they seem to want sex less than us. I think they are very insecure about it. Personally??? I want my husband to be the man and take me when he wants me.....


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## holdingtwenty (Jul 28, 2010)

The truth is that all men are different when it comes to their sex drive. Have you spoken to him about this? If you have, What does he say? Find out what turns him on the most. Maybe having sex at a different time of the day would help you. Try the morning. As a guy, I always loved that and it broke up the routine.

Try to spice things up if you can. Dress in a sexy outfit. Ask him if he would like to watch a porn movie with you. Here is one thing that always got me turned on-- start giving him a massage. then when it is his turn to massage you get naked. I always loved that. Maybe a little roleplaying would help.

Just some ideas for you to ponder. Good luck and it sounds as if you husband did well in the sex department when he married you.


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## Deejo (May 20, 2008)

Has your appearance changed significantly since becoming a mom? It's always a bugaboo around here, but a reality nonetheless. If you put on substantial weight or stopped taking care of yourself the way you did pre-kids, this could have an impact on his attraction to you.


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