# How do you confront a rageaholic who is a shopaholic?



## thefunone (Feb 6, 2011)

My husband shops all the time but does not admit to it. I think he thinks that shopaholics are people who by things like clothing and shoes all the time. He buys cars, boats, motorcycles, radio controlled vehicles, and guns all the time. He has had 10 cars in 5 and 1/2 years. He has us way in over our heads in debt and just keeps buying more by finding ways to justify it. Saying things like "this car will save us on gas" or "this car has has too many mechanical problems (after we have already spent tons working on it)". I try to talk to him but he just gets angry and says I am not supportive. What do I do?


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## In_The_Wind (Feb 17, 2012)

Have you tried Marriage Counseling ??


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

That depends. What do you want to do about a seemingly unmedicated untreated bipolar with some kind of OCD/anxiety/hoarding affect?


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## Mr.D.E.B.T. (Jul 19, 2012)

I would suggest first getting a better understanding of why your husband thinks the way he does. Ask him questions about his lifestyle desires and what he wants to see for you both. Also, ask him about both of you seeing a money manager(counselor) about helping you to achieve your lifestyle dreams. Use a maximizing our potiential type of attitude and stay away from the critical approach.


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## thefunone (Feb 6, 2011)

We have been to marriage counseling in the past and I think we will have to go again. He has never been diagnosed with any disorders. My brother said my husband is just bored and trying to fill a void. He recently has started selling some of his things because I have complained so much.


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

thefunone said:


> He has never been diagnosed with any disorders.


Maybe it is time to have him properly evaluated.




thefunone said:


> brother said my husband is just bored and trying to fill a void.


That's exactly what defines a hoarder. They usually start out by trying to fill a void. It starts out small before it becomes the colossal messes we see on TV. However, it is a good sign he is parting with some of the items. But, he is doing it for the wrong reason. He will be back at it when the complaining dies down.


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## wiigirl (Jun 14, 2012)

In_The_Wind said:


> Have you tried Marriage Counseling ??












:iagree:


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

Shop-a-holic/hoarding is an anxiety disorder that's often coupled with an extreme need for control.


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## Reformed_A_hole (Aug 21, 2012)

Learning to use the words "goodbye", "I'm leaving" might be a place to start.


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