# Curious?!?!?!?



## still reeling

Okay - I got to thinking about this whole porn issue. I guess this question is more for the guys - how would you feel about your wife, gf, etc having a secret life of porn, cyber sex with other men, etc. Hide it, lie about it - get mad when you quesion it. Please honestly reflect on this and give your "honest" opinion. I know what my H's response would be but I am curious what your response would be before I post his.


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## martino

Cybering? no way! that can lead to a real hookup. Porn? no problem, my wife gets a kick out of porn, it must have a story and she always points out stupid things I never notice. Like terrible kissing, bad acting, ugly furniture etc.


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## Atholk

Porn yes, cyber no.


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## GAsoccerman

my wife is like Martino's , Porn is so stupid, that it's funny. I would care less.

Cybering, she has done that, I am fine with it.

She prefers watching her soap opera or other certain TV shows with her vibrator when no one is home.

She likes the men in those shows...so that is her "porn"

I'm good with it, rather her play alone then someone real.


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## trev

Porn she enjoys and often plays alone with her toys whilst im away or at work ... shes to shy to watch porn with me still !! Cybering id be a little un easy about but if it turns her on id love to watch


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## Open Heart

I believe that porn for some relationships can be healthy, and for some can be damaging. It all varies. From guys point of view. In no way are we wanting them over are wives, but we use them as visual excitements. We are not trying to choose them over are significant other, because there is no comp. But as one person posted earlier cybering can be dangerous, cause you are putting yourself in a position to do damage.


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## okeydokie

well, if my wife was "cyborging" then i would first be angry but i would also have to ask myself why, what have i not provided. porn i could care less cause she aint into that.


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## still reeling

Thank you for all the responses, I myself don't care to watch porn alone, it really does nothing for me solo. I do, however, enjoy watching with my H very much so. 

His answer to this is very hypocritical and it drives me crazy. It makes him very jealous and angry if I watch without him. Funny thing is I don't watch but he seems to think I do. Which I think is more of him transferring his guilt of him watching without me - to me so that if he thinks I am doing it then it is okay for him. Bottom line is it is okay for him and not me. We have come a long way on this issue and watching porn occassionally is not really the issue for me. But as Hitched put it "But if its a substitute for intimacy, an addiction, or done with deceit then there's a problem" is exactly what we have dealt with in the past. All of the above! So now my next question is this -is porn addiction similar to drug or alcohol addiction - just one hit or just one drink for an addict is not an option, they will fall back into that addiction. So is watching occassional porn every now and then the same as the just one hit or drink? I guess I am sitting here waiting to fall back into the addiction. He seems to think that it is no big deal, I have my doubts - am I making to big a deal of this issue?


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