# Sex during period. His lousy attitude.



## walkingwounded (May 7, 2011)

So, my H *hates* the thought of sex during my period.

I am fine with it. Does not bother me at all. 

H over the last year has developed a real aversion to it. He was never especially bothered one way or another I remember, allthough he swears it has allways bothered him.

Now, he will ask if I am "bleeding" or some other such lovely way of addressing it. Then when days have gone by, he will check by asking if things are done wanting to resume sex.

I guess this problem is twofold. First, his lousy attitude. He never used to be so negative about it. Why the need for the crude language? His attitude, I do not get where it has come from. I understand he has the right to feel like he does. He says I take it personally like I think his not wanting to have sex is to do with me. I don't... But I do, if that makes sense?

Second, things become all about him. If he gets in the mood, he will ask me to give him a hand. He appears to think that somehow my libido disappears during my period and never seems to consider that I might want a helping hand. I called him on it the other day and he stopped dead, I could see it had not occurred to him that I may still get in the mood, which is crazy considering I am more HD than him!

It is weird, putting the time of the month thing aside, I actually stopped giving him unsolicited BJs and other stuff just for him, because it was *never* returned. I enjoy doing those things but I have never been able to fathom why he would never want to do that for me. A perfect time would be during that time of the month, *and* with me being HD, it would make perfect sense, no?

I guess it is another example of how he just does not think about sex unless *he* wants it.

Not sure if I am asking a question but feel better for ranting


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## countrybumpkin (Nov 8, 2012)

walkingwounded said:


> So, my H *hates* the thought of sex during my period.
> 
> I am fine with it. Does not bother me at all.
> 
> ...



I can say that sex on my period is something I don't do. We have on a few occasions had sex in the shower during that week but it is not something either of us would want on a regular basis. It's a little on the nasty/ messy side. I still give him bjs during that time because it's not his fault that I bleed and he shouldn't have to suffer. But all the work that I put into that is always returned when that week is done.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## CuddleBug (Nov 26, 2012)

When it's that time of the month for my wife, she gives me 1 -2 BJ's and I'm good with that. If she was adventurous and wanted sex during her period, I would definitely go for it. Maybe I'm not the norm on this.


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## romantic_guy (Nov 8, 2011)

Neither one of us really likes to have sex during her periods. For one thing for many years she flowed very heavily and had bad cramps...not so good for feeling sexual. At almost 57 she is still having them. She has always been great about giving me hand jobs during those times. She has no desire to orgasm during her periods, but I would find a way to help her if she wanted.


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## EnjoliWoman (Jul 2, 2012)

Orgasms are fabulous for cramps.

I don't care. I've never been with any guy who had cared. Then again it's very light and only lasts 4 days. Oddly one guy who was against oral was fine with sex during my period. Go figure - I thought he'd be queasy about it.

Hey, you can't make someone like something. Has the flow changed over the years? Has the length, texture or other, ahem, 'features' of that time changed?


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## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

Sex during period was never my cup of tea.
I think its too messy.
Sometimes she wants it during her period , but I'm queasy about it.


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## Thundarr (Jul 4, 2012)

It doesn't seem odd that he doesn't like it that time of month. I mean laying out a towell or something for the mess and then having to see it afterwards can be pretty un-sexy. Also from an evolutionary perspective, you can't concieve during that time which is a subconcious turnoff as well.

BUT.... if you are willing and he doesn't want to then he can just wait for the handjob or bj. Unless he's going to go down as well which I'm sure is not an option.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

When I still had periods I loved sex at that time. It made all the cramps and PMS go away. My husband had no problem with it. I'd tell him I needed a dose of his medicine and he'd accommodate quite happily.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

I hate it but did it anyway. Best way to deal with her PMS which isn't very pretty especially if I deny her sex during this time.

Anyways walkingwounded, I really don't know how one is to deal with your husband, you've tried everything already.


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## KanDo (Jun 15, 2011)

walkingwounded said:


> So, my H *hates* the thought of sex during my period....
> 
> INow, he will ask if I am "bleeding" or some other such lovely way of addressing it. Then when days have gone by, he will check by asking if things are done wanting to resume sex.
> 
> I guess this problem is twofold. First, his lousy attitude. He never used to be so negative about it. Why the need for the crude language? His attitude, I do not get where it has come from. .....


Wow,
*HIS attitude!? *I would estimate that more than 1/2 of men are put-off by the idea vaginal intercourse during that time of the month. Probably more women! I know it isn't my favorite, although I do oblige from time to time. Not really too erotic to be covered in blood.... 

And what is your problem with his questions about whether you are "bleeding"? Perfectly accurate and in no way crude language. 

The request to help him out during your periods obviously is a sore point for you, so kindly decline.

I don't know what your other problems are; but, I my opinion, this one is all on you.


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## Omgitsjoe (Oct 1, 2012)

I am normally not a patient person but during her time of month I am very patient and am quite happy with the one or two BJ's she provides =)


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

The blood's fine for me though not really a turn on it's just the smell from time to time.


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## StargateFan (Nov 19, 2012)

I would not be as harsh or blunt as KanDo but I understand the sentiment

I personally am up for anything but oral. Oral is just unreasonable. You have to understand that some men a just uneasy with blood and you really can't knock them for that. My wife is usually quite up for it as long as she is not in pain. 

I am not a biblical person, but if I recall there is something in there negative about it. So if he had a religious upbringing that might have something to do with it. 

Let him know what language you find offensive and what language he should use. Margret Monthly, Aunt Flo, on the rag, gushing, bleeding, period are all terms I have heard women use. 

Seriously, if men had to go through what you do every month hysterectomies would be more common than circumcision. That is why we are such babies about pain. It is something you have had do deal with your most of your life be we don't. To most if us it is kind of gross, we don't bleed unless something bad has happened. I am not saying that is fair, it is just the way it is.


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## walkingwounded (May 7, 2011)

Things are actually better. Due to changes in my diet things are lighter and do not last as long as before.

I do not expect him to relish the thought! But when I say his language, I guess really I am talking more about his tone and body language/facial expressions. I just do not think there is any need for it. He makes me feel like some kind of outcast for a week, like he cannot touch me in a sexual way. Being I am higher drive than him, by the end of the week I feel disconnected from him. He thinks I am being stupid and says "it's only a week" but I am sure if for a week I refused to touch him and made it clear the thought was disgusting, yet wanted him to pleasure *me*, he would have a problem with it.

He *never* offers a helping hand. You guys out there with lovely giving wives, who initiate unsolicited BJs and HJs. I do not think it unreasonable for him to offer in a likeminded fashion ( I do not expect any oral at this time.) Yet he never does. I have decided that given his blanket refusal to engage in *any* kind of sexual activity geared towards my pleasure for a week each month, I will return the favor. He can sort himself out.


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## Mavash. (Jan 26, 2012)

I know all about your husband.

Rant away.


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## walkingwounded (May 7, 2011)

Mavash. said:


> I know all about your husband.
> 
> Rant away.


It is just so frustrating Mavash. It has come like a bullet from out of nowhere. Not all that long ago he was OK with it. Not great but did not have a problem with relations at that time. It looks like for whatever reason he has stepped it up. Says he hates it, is surprised I do not have a problem with it, it is gory, messy, etc...

If I didn't know better I would swear he is being passive agressive about something, may be related to our preexisting dynamic of his having turned me down so many times then saying he never did it and being reluctant to help mend my wounded esteem.


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## Cletus (Apr 27, 2012)

I always liked it because we had to use physical birth control, so it was the only time that we could enjoy unprotected sex.

I suspect that this for some men is in the same category as anal intercourse for some women. I mean, there's something just a tiny bit off-putting about putting your body part into another person and having it come out covered in blood. 

If you aren't going to berate a woman for not wanting anal, it's going to be hard to convince me that men can't have a non-negotiable act either.


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