# how long do I put up with this?



## 75teach12 (Aug 4, 2010)

I never would have thought my marriage would end up like this.
I have been married for *33 years* and always felt content with my marriage and we were a good match. The last 2-3 years have changed everything and I don't know what to do.
Through no one's fault, my husband has changed so much and i don't know how much longer I can live like this. He has medical problems that have resulted in his abuse of pain medication and a complete change in his personality. I suppose this has happened gradually over several years, but has gotten really bad recently. I look at him now and wonder why do I stay with him? He certainly is not the same person but since we have been together so long and have such a long history, how can I leave him? He has no wish to fix any problems and I'm not so sure I want to. Any advice?


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## Brewster 59 (Jun 19, 2010)

Talk to the doc about your concerns, and the changes you have seen. How is he getting all of these pain meds he is abusing. How will you feel leaving a sick man? Seems to me his drug addiction needs to be dealt with then hopefully the marriage can be saved.


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

This is more common than the general public is aware of. Every town/city has at least one doctor who loves to prescribe big doses of pain medication--rather than solve medical problems. Perhaps it is time you insisted on him seeing another doctor for a second opinion. In addition, let him know that the two of you are going to take steps to get healthier and cut the medications. Let the new doctor know what the goal is. If your husband is already addicted, this could be futile.


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