# My husband cheated with my neighbor/friend



## marriage123 (Oct 4, 2017)

Hi, 

My husband and I bought some land and then divided the land off and sold some acreage to my best friend(A & D) and her husband. We then sold off more of the land to our other friends(B and C) The two couples we sold the land to happen to be brothers. We also made a common area(we all own this) with a pool. We all have kids ranging from 6-11. They all play together and get along great. This past Summer was our first Summer with the pool. I caught my husband cheating on me two years ago with a lady who I did not know. We went to counseling and learned that we were not communicating very well at all. Things got much better with us until this Summer. I noticed him distancing himself and what I call checking out. He wanted to stay up late and hang out with everyone at the pool. I would stay and hang out, but would explain that I wanted to go home early. We always ended up staying late. I tried all Summer to tell him that I felt him drifting and that I didn't understand what was going on. He would say that he didn't know what was going on and that he was tired of me nagging him and being on him all the time. We started counseling 2 weeks ago. All three couples went to a game together last Sunday and then came home. At the end of the game B & C got into it over B getting a text that he didn't like. She cried the entire ride home. Once we were home my husband said he was going to pick up our child from a friend's house. After he left, I got an awful feeling inside me. I looked up his location on my phone and noticed he was at a local park. I drove to the park ,and he was driving out of the park. I kept driving and then I see B's car parked. I go to her car & grabbed her phone. My husband then calls her phone & says "Watch out, my wife is pulling up!" He later confessed to me that they have been talking on the phone and had met in a parking lot one other time and talked. He admitted that they kissed at the park for the first time right before he had left. He blamed it all on alcohol and said he wants to work on our marriage and get to the bottom of what is wrong with him. We have continued counseling and it is going really great. I met with B & she explained it was all about talking and that they both just vented to each other. She said that he kissed her and that she never wanted anything like that out of the friendship with him. I just don't know what to do moving forward with her living right near us. To make matters worse. We all have a trip to Disney booked for the end of October. I have to move forward with us all going on the trip. I couldn't possibly take that from the kids. I am wondering if we can ever get past this, and if I will ever be able to be friends with her again? I also am needing advice on how to handle being around her at Disney.


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## Mizzbak (Sep 10, 2016)

I am sorry that you are here.

Does C know what you found out about the relationship between your husband and his wife? If he does not, then you need to tell him everything that you know. 
I would include the information about your husband's previous infidelity. C is sure to pass that on to her, and it may help her to realise exactly what kind of relationship she was indulging in. 
(I'm afraid that it is very unlikely that you have the full story about what went on.) 

As hard as it is, you need to focus on the fact that your feelings of betrayal should primarily come from what your husband did. (It is very easy to put all one's energy into hating the OM/W and blaming them for what happened.) I am by no means suggesting that you should not see her as a threat and deal with her accordingly, but your husband has done this before. You need to bear that in mind. 

What consequences is your husband experiencing for his faithlessness?


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

Isn’t life great for your husband.You catch him cheating twice and he says he wants to work on himself to find out what’s wrong with him.I will tell you what’s wrong with him,he is a cheating,lying ********* and if you don’t tell the other woman’s husband you are condoning his behavior.
If her husband knows he will watch her like a hawk and that can only help you.
Fool me once shame on you.Fool me twice shame on me.


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## marriage123 (Oct 4, 2017)

Well, B actually had cheated on her husband before as well. Both my husband & B cheated before. My husband knew that about B because I had told him that at the beginning of the Summer. I think that is what drew him to her. My husband claims he never hooked up with the other woman & only kissed B. I don't want to tell C because then our entire "neighborhood" would be done for good. B told me after she was caught that her husband was concerned with my husband flirting with her at the pool. I just don't want all of what we have where we live to be ruined for good. That is what I am scared of by telling her husband.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Tell her husband, he deserves to know if you consider him a friend you would say. He has a right to choose who he is with. Besides that you are not ruining the situational they did with there selfishness. 

Now on to you, I hate to say this but RUN. Your life will be SO much better. It's a difference of 1 or 2 years of pain or him doing it again and a wasted lifetime. Toxic people like your husband and this women are like cancer, they end up killing your life one way or another. 

There will be others on here to give you hope and listen to them if you want. But if he does it again remember what I said here. You husband is a serial cheater. It's a sad waste that a good women is wasted on him.


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti (Apr 23, 2017)

marriage123 said:


> Well, B actually had cheated on her husband before as well. Both my husband & B cheated before. My husband knew that about B because I had told him that at the beginning of the Summer. I think that is what drew him to her. My husband claims he never hooked up with the other woman & only kissed B. *I don't want to tell C because then our entire "neighborhood" would be done for good. *B told me after she was caught that her husband was concerned with my husband flirting with her at the pool. I just don't want all of what we have where we live to be ruined for good. That is what I am scared of by telling her husband.


Oh, it's done. It can never, ever be the same again. Playing ostrich with your head in the sand isn't going to change that one brutally irrefutable fact. 

Your common area will forever be a symbol of infidelity. Why would you want to work so hard to hang on to that?


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## wilson (Nov 5, 2012)

marriage123 said:


> I just don't want all of what we have where we live to be ruined for good. That is what I am scared of by telling her husband.


Yeah, that was one of my first thoughts in reading your story. It sounds like you had an idyllic situation for a while. This is all complicated by the living situations. The way I see it, the least impactful option would be if your H left. It's hard to see how you can recover if both your H and B are still living there. I think you and your H need to talk with B and C and get this out in the open. 

For the Disney trip, can just you and the wife of the A&D couple go with all the kids? I can't see how it works if B, C and your H are there. But if you two moms can go with all the kids, it can still be a good time.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

wilson said:


> Yeah, that was one of my first thoughts in reading your story. It sounds like you had an idyllic situation for a while. This is all complicated by the living situations. The way I see it, the least impactful option would be if your H left. It's hard to see how you can recover if both your H and C are still living three. I think you and your H need to talk with B and C and get this out in the open.
> 
> For the Disney trip, can just you and the wife of the A&D couple go with all the kids? I can't see how it works if B, C and your H are there. But if you two moms can go with all the kids, it can still be a good time.


She should go with the other spouse that was cheated on. (kidding, kind of)

There is kind of a lesson about who we choose to be friends with in this though. If you know your friend is a cheater you are better off writing them out of your life. Here this poor women decided to trust her friend as many do, thinking even though she was a cheater she wouldn't do that to her because they are friends. She pretty much joined her family to her toxic friend, and like all cheaters do in their selfish ways the friend went about cheating with her husband. The husband also being crap. Cheating dishonest people are toxic, you have to cut them out like cancer. Everywhere they go they spread misery.


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## wilson (Nov 5, 2012)

sokillme said:


> She should go with the other spouse that was cheated on. (kidding, kind of)


Ha! That would be funny. But that reminds me of something. *Marriage123*, you should keep emotional distance between you and C. You're in danger of starting something up with him if you lean on each other and commiserate about the situation. You both will need someone to lean on, but it should be someone who is impartial and you won't be attracted to.


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti (Apr 23, 2017)

wilson said:


> Yeah, that was one of my first thoughts in reading your story. It sounds like you had an idyllic situation for a while. This is all complicated by the living situations. The way I see it, the least impactful option would be if your H left. It's hard to see how you can recover if both your H and B are still living there. I think you and your H need to talk with B and C and get this out in the opend .
> 
> For the Disney trip, can just you and the wife of the A&D couple go with all the kids? I can't see how it works if B, C and your H are there. But if you two moms can go with all the kids, it can still be a good time.


Except that would leave WH alone with AP. They couldn't screw Disney for the kids but the could screw each other


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Rocky Mountain Yeti said:


> Except that would leave WH alone with OW. They couldn't screw Disney for the kids but the could screw each other


They deserve each other though. They would probably last about a month before they would be cheating on each other.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

wilson said:


> Ha! That would be funny. But that reminds me of something. *Marriage123*, you should keep emotional distance between you and C. You're in danger of starting something up with him if you lean on each other and commiserate about the situation. You both will need someone to lean on, but it should be someone who is impartial and you won't be attracted to.


I have read a few threads where this happened. The BS seem to end up happy. Not saying it's right, not saying it is SO wrong either. Anyway. what a mess.


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti (Apr 23, 2017)

sokillme said:


> They deserve each other though. They would probably last about a month before they would be cheating on each other.


Maybe true, but still a horrible emotional state for OP to be in at this time-fighting through the mental moves while riding Space Mountain


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Rocky Mountain Yeti said:


> Maybe true, but still a horrible emotional state for OP to be in at this time-fighting through the mental moves while riding Space Mountain


I know I am kidding. I am sorry OP if I am making it harder for you. I am just mad on your behalf is all. You deserve better! So does her husband!


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## wilson (Nov 5, 2012)

Rocky Mountain Yeti said:


> Except that would leave WH alone with AP. They couldn't screw Disney for the kids but the could screw each other


Yep. So you'd have to make it a requirement that H go live somewhere else that you can verify (like your parents' house).


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## Primrose (Mar 4, 2015)

marriage123 said:


> Well, B actually had cheated on her husband before as well. Both my husband & B cheated before. My husband knew that about B because I had told him that at the beginning of the Summer. I think that is what drew him to her. My husband claims he never hooked up with the other woman & only kissed B. *I don't want to tell C because then our entire "neighborhood" would be done for good.* B told me after she was caught that her husband was concerned with my husband flirting with her at the pool. I just don't want all of what we have where we live to be ruined for good. That is what I am scared of by telling her husband.


Seriously? Your neighborhood has already gone to crap. Your husband is cheating on you with your "friend". Rest assured, you only know the tip of the iceberg. He only told you enough to keep you at bay because telling you they "only talked" would not have explained their secrecy. 

C deserves to know. How would you feel if he was the one who caught them and then proceeded to keep this information from YOU? 

Your husband doesn't deserve a third chance (fool me once...), but if you are hell bent on working it out with a serial cheater, you need to close up the boundaries and he needs zero access to other women, including the two who live near you.


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

They’re lying — they’ve been having sex.

Expose the affair to her husband and file for divorce.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

OP I know this is hard and we are being harsh. It's just that most of us have seen this thread hundreds of times. They all pretty much follow the same script. The one thing I can say to you it, it WILL get better.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

marriage123 said:


> Hi,
> 
> My husband and I bought some land and then divided the land off and sold some acreage to my best friend(A & D) and her husband. We then sold off more of the land to our other friends(B and C) The two couples we sold the land to happen to be brothers. We also made a common area(we all own this) with a pool. We all have kids ranging from 6-11. They all play together and get along great. This past Summer was our first Summer with the pool. I caught my husband cheating on me two years ago with a lady who I did not know. We went to counseling and learned that we were not communicating very well at all. Things got much better with us until this Summer. I noticed him distancing himself and what I call checking out. He wanted to stay up late and hang out with everyone at the pool. I would stay and hang out, but would explain that I wanted to go home early. We always ended up staying late. I tried all Summer to tell him that I felt him drifting and that I didn't understand what was going on. He would say that he didn't know what was going on and that he was tired of me nagging him and being on him all the time. We started counseling 2 weeks ago. All three couples went to a game together last Sunday and then came home. At the end of the game B & C got into it over B getting a text that he didn't like. She cried the entire ride home. Once we were home my husband said he was going to pick up our child from a friend's house. After he left, I got an awful feeling inside me. I looked up his location on my phone and noticed he was at a local park. I drove to the park ,and he was driving out of the park. I kept driving and then I see B's car parked. I go to her car & grabbed her phone. My husband then calls her phone & says "Watch out, my wife is pulling up!" He later confessed to me that they have been talking on the phone and had met in a parking lot one other time and talked. He admitted that they kissed at the park for the first time right before he had left. He blamed it all on alcohol and said he wants to work on our marriage and get to the bottom of what is wrong with him. We have continued counseling and it is going really great. I met with B & she explained it was all about talking and that they both just vented to each other. She said that he kissed her and that she never wanted anything like that out of the friendship with him. I just don't know what to do moving forward with her living right near us. To make matters worse. We all have a trip to Disney booked for the end of October. I have to move forward with us all going on the trip. I couldn't possibly take that from the kids. I am wondering if we can ever get past this, and if I will ever be able to be friends with her again? I also am needing advice on how to handle being around her at Disney.


Welcome to TAM, @marriage123. I am sorry you had to seek us out, but glad you found us.

I think your thread belongs in the Coping With Infidelity section of this site. If you wish, a moderator can move it. If you want it moved, please ask.


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## fotf17 (Sep 25, 2017)

@marriage123, tell the OW husband unhesitatingly. Not only are you condoning your husband and the OW's behavior if you do not, you are being complicit in their infidelity. The other husband deserves to know.

Let the fall out land where it may.


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

Friends are great.
Friends are hard to make, hard to keep.

When friends go bad... 
They drop the 'r' and now you have fiends.


..................................................................................................

Proximity is the greatest catalyst for infidelity.
And friends are close quartered.

Push a man and a women within arms reach.
Push a man and a women within arms reach and you build static electricity.
Push a man and a women who are charged up...together, the man discharges into the women.

Let a Martian tap the Wysiwig keyboard, he discharges his wit into your halo. 
From his tale, his tail goes straight out.. flat, discharges the wisdom then droops down.
Recharging. 

And waiting for the* HMS* @Blondilocks to rake his hull with her battery of 42 pounders.
Rake his hull, for being the Old Rake that she 'believes' him to be.
.......................................................................................................................

SunCMars gave Blondilocks a virtual knife a while back. 
Telling her to choose. 
Asked her to choose.

Gave her the power to cut off his charged wit.
Gave her the power to end his erotic musings. She declined.

Her indignant, yet indifferent weakness remains a lesser gods strength.
Talk is cheap.

Just Sayin'


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## marriage123 (Oct 4, 2017)

I at least want to wait to tell C until after the Disney trip. Why ruin all of the kids fun when they are so looking forward to this? The children did nothing to deserve getting told they are no longer going b/c of some made up story to them.


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## marriage123 (Oct 4, 2017)

@MattMatt- Yes, I will move it.


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## Primrose (Mar 4, 2015)

A Disney trip is not that important when you have a failing marriage, a cheater husband, a crappy friend, and a commune of secrecy. 

Trust me, the kids will be fine. But if you're not willing to part on your vacation, your "friend" should no longer be included. Then tell her that it's up to her to back out on her own or you will be more than willing to fill everyone else in. 

I'm not going to sugar coat this. It's no wonder to me that your husband continues to break his vows. No, you do not deserve any of this, but it's obvious he has no real consequences, so he sees no reason to stop.


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## Yeswecan (Jul 25, 2014)

marriage123 said:


> I at least want to wait to tell C until after the Disney trip. Why ruin all of the kids fun when they are so looking forward to this? The children did nothing to deserve getting told they are no longer going b/c of some made up story to them.


I would bust it wide open. Once done, head to Disney with the kids.


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## Steve1000 (Nov 25, 2013)

marriage123 said:


> I at least want to wait to tell C until after the Disney trip. Why ruin all of the kids fun when they are so looking forward to this? The children did nothing to deserve getting told they are no longer going b/c of some made up story to them.


By writing this, you acknowledge that Mr. C would not likely be so understanding and unwilling to rock the boat so the kids can go together to Disney. If you want your kids to go to Disney, then take them to Disney without the drama of going with the Other Woman and her husband.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

marriage123 said:


> @MattMatt- Yes, I will move it.


Just moved it for you, @marriage123.


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## BobSimmons (Mar 2, 2013)

marriage123 said:


> I at least want to wait to tell C until after the Disney trip. Why ruin all of the kids fun when they are so looking forward to this? The children did nothing to deserve getting told they are no longer going b/c of some made up story to them.


Because this is real life and if this story is real a man will be going on a trip with three people whom are essentially going behind his back and lying to him.

It's amazing how many people post a story about people lying and cheating and yet they lie themselves.

But best of luck to you. I'm out.


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## marriage123 (Oct 4, 2017)

I understand it is real life. I am also willing to take on pain for the sake of children. It is also the other family that lives on the property beside us that is going. Why mess up their vacation b/c their stupid sister in law screwed up? 

What if my husband is in therapy for this? Do you not think that he would ever recover from being a cheater?


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

marriage123 said:


> I understand it is real life. I am also willing to take on pain for the sake of children. It is also the other family that lives on the property beside us that is going. Why mess up their vacation b/c their stupid sister in law screwed up?
> 
> *What if my husband is in therapy for this? Do you not think that he would ever recover from being a cheater?*


No.

He’s showed you that he has no interest in being anything but a serial cheat.

You’re trying to make what you _feel_ (first mistake, BTW) will be the right decision but you won’t let go of the outcome.

It’s like you’re trying to fit a square peg into a round hole.

And the play set is broken.

And the manufacturer isn’t honoring the lifetime warranty, but you don’t care about that so long as you can get that peg to fit without falling out of the bottom.

But it doesn’t.

And because you refuse to acknowledge that, you just go right back to slipping it back in... over and over and over.

Either way, you want the affair to end, right? That’s not going to happen until you blow it up.

And you do THAT by exposing.


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## wilson (Nov 5, 2012)

marriage123 said:


> What if my husband is in therapy for this? Do you not think that he would ever recover from being a cheater?


Based on his behavior, it's unlikely he will be cured from cheating. It seems like it's a fundamental part of his personality. Likely he'll cheat again unless you can cut off all temptation. 

Think about how little he must have thought about the consequences. He's sniffing around a woman who lives in your tiny community and you all socialize together. It's certain to come out eventually, and when it does, he'll lose everything. That shows a serious lack of empathy and impulse control. You'll have to keep a spotlight on him because he's not mature enough to prevent himself from doing this again.


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## TAMAT (Jun 20, 2015)

Marriage123,

It's a living hell being around your spouses affair partner the vacation needs to be your family only, I'm sorry but your H has crapped all over your lives.

Infidelity is not in the category of mistakes, it's easier to overcome someones death than cheating. 

Get tested for STDs, perhaps refrain from sex until your H is clear of virulent HPV strains. 

You kids need to be told what happened in an age appropriate way. 

Tamat


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## Primrose (Mar 4, 2015)

He doesn't need therapy to help him NOT cheat. He knows why he cheats. Because he can. And he continuously does because he hasn't had any consequence severe enough to deter him.


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## Blondilocks (Jul 4, 2013)

What do you find appealing about going on vacation with your husband and his girlfriend? Once the other couple find out about you withholding info they will view you in the same dim light that they will view your husband and the sil. Don't you think that C's brother has a right to know he's unwittingly vacationing with a guy who is screwing his brother over?

But, you're ok with this as long as your kids get to shake Mickey's hand and, of course, your life goes on as usual. Now, you know why he's a repeat offender - because you essentially condone it.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

@marriage123 what did you think of him driving to pick up your child whilst he was drunk?

Your husband is out of control in more ways than one.


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## happy as a clam (Jan 5, 2014)

Newsflash - your "neighborhood" is already ruined. Expose to everyone. With any luck, B & C will sell and hightail it out of there, and a nice, happily married couple will move in.


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## Roselyn (Sep 19, 2010)

marriage123 said:


> Well, B actually had cheated on her husband before as well. Both my husband & B cheated before. My husband knew that about B because I had told him that at the beginning of the Summer. I think that is what drew him to her. My husband claims he never hooked up with the other woman & only kissed B. I don't want to tell C because then our entire "neighborhood" would be done for good. B told me after she was caught that her husband was concerned with my husband flirting with her at the pool. I just don't want all of what we have where we live to be ruined for good. That is what I am scared of by telling her husband.


Tell her husband! Your neighbors already know. It's always the spouses that know last as they prefer to hide the truth. This is not your husband's first infidelity nor your neighbor's. Don't be a doormat. You are married to a serial cheater & your neighbor's wife is a serial cheater. You value your lifestyle over your marriage.


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## Lostme (Nov 14, 2014)

Not sure why a vacation is more important than letting the other spouse know his wife was cheating with your H.

Your H and her messed up the trip, let them explain it to the kids.


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## JustTheFacts (Jun 27, 2017)

A trip to Disneyland should be the last thing on your mind right now. You just caught your husband cheating! Again! You need to deal with this now. Expose to the other H immediately. ................ There, now that you've done that, guess what? That's right, your husband is going to cheat again. Why? Because he's an unremorseful serial cheater who has suffered no consequences for his selfish actions. I'm sorry but save for some mega epiphany on your husband's part he won't change and divorce will be your only escape from a future of this. Wishing you much strength.


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## jsmart (Mar 14, 2015)

You want to postpone exposure so you can go on this Disney trip? I guess you must not be that upset. How you can play friendship with this woman that's been having sex with you're husband? And YES, they have been having sex. 

You already know your twice cheating WH is a scoundrel but this "friend" is a truly nasty woman. To cheat on her husband and father of children AGAIN is bad enough but to cheat with a family friend is vile. I've read of a few threads with similar situations from the WWs perspective. These woman have no remorse, just entitlement.

If you stay with this man, you will be played out again. He's a serial cheater. Once you told him about the other woman's past, he went to work pursuing such an easy mark. Don't buy the he's in counseling bit, these two are laying low until the smoke clears and you're once again lulled to sleep. They both know that your willingness to go forward with this trip, for the kids, strongly sends the signal that you condone adultery.

BTW: you need to read some threads. You'll notice that the betrayed spouses, that quickly take strong bold actions, including full exposure and publicly filing for D, usually have waywards that are scrambling to save their marriage & family.


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## fotf17 (Sep 25, 2017)

marriage123 said:


> Why mess up their vacation b/c their stupid sister in law screwed up?


The vacation is the least of the worries. And honestly, once he finds out, the memories of this vacation will be tainted and ruined anyway, in part due to your inaction, or your decision that you think you know what's best for the OW's husband. The vacation is already ruined man. Tell him before.


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti (Apr 23, 2017)

I think all this judgment about not wanting to abandon the Disney trip is misplaced.

I know if I had promised my kids a Disney trip and then I found out my spouse was having an affair, I'd still be just as motivated to take my kids on that trip. I'm not necessarily saying still going on the trip is definitely the best COA, but expecting to just drop it out of hand is harsh and unrealistic. 

Saying the victim of the infidelity is somehow not hurt by the infidelity because she still wants to take her kids to Disney is an unfounded judgment. If she's feeling a horrible break with her spouse, the desire to bond with the kids is likely to surge. The kids are still what is right an pure in her life and she will want to nurture that. 

She needs to kick this guy to the curb/detach, and going to Disney _without him_ may be a good start. "Look dear, you have once again violated our sacred vows and, as such, have lost any moral claim to enjoy time with your family. Therefore I will be taking the kids to Disney but you will not be a part of it. We will have a grand time bonding without you."

Of she could cancel the trip, forfeit any deposits, and use the money saved by not going to get the best barracuda lawyer in the district and take his ass to the cleaners.

Or both--go rock Disney and then take his ass to the cleaners.


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## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

marriage123 said:


> I understand it is real life. I am also willing to take on pain for the sake of children. It is also the other family that lives on the property beside us that is going. Why mess up their vacation b/c their stupid sister in law screwed up?
> 
> What if my husband is in therapy for this? Do you not think that he would ever recover from being a cheater?


No, none of you will recover, because there are no consequences and you are allowing him to treat you like a doormat. Go scorched earth, you will regret it if you don't. You are using the kids as an excuse to not take action, is this really the kind of environment, darkness, etc you want the kids to be brought up in. There has always to be consequences, just because you pull the plug does not mean you did it, THEY are the ones culpable, let them clean up the mess.


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## Adelais (Oct 23, 2013)

Trying to understand who is going to Disney. Is the cheating woman taking her family to Disney, or is it the other family that shares your common property?

If it is the other family, go ahead and go to Disney after you expose, if you still want to. It is not her fault her family member is a cheater.

If it is the cheating woman who is planning to go to Disney with your family, don't go with her. If you think that Disney is a needed distraction for your family, plan a trip on a different date.

You need to tell the husband about his wife, ASAP. It doesn't matter that she has cheated before. Wouldn't you want to know if someone knew your husband was cheating, if you hadn't caught him yourself?


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti (Apr 23, 2017)

Jiminy Cricket! This has become a real Mickey Mouse thread.
In fact, it's gotten rather Goofy.


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## TRy (Sep 14, 2011)

marriage123 said:


> I understand it is real life. I am also willing to take on pain for the sake of children.


You should not be willing to not tell the other woman's husband and "to take on pain for the sake of children", when you should be doing everything that you need to in order to protect your marriage for the sake of the children. No matter if your children know it or not, a fun trip to Disney is not as important to their lives as your marriage to their father.


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