# I have a question for the married guys



## mae (Aug 17, 2009)

What does your wife do that you think is sexy? What makes you go "WOW, my wife's hot!"? Or what are things you would like her to do that would make you feel that way?


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## michzz (Jun 6, 2008)

She doesn't do anything, now want to. 

It pretty much sucks.


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## Amplexor (Feb 13, 2008)

When she comes to bed wearing one of my pajama tops and nothing else.


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## nwguy111 (Aug 26, 2008)

I love it when my wife goes out in public with a dress or long skirt and no panties. I don't know this until she eventually reveals it to me. It's almost unbearable waiting to get home and get busy!


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## mae (Aug 17, 2009)

Thanks for the responses guys. I'll keep them in mind for the next time around I guess...


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## MBuck26 (Sep 13, 2009)

I like when my wife tanns she looks hot and when she gets her hair done she look geourgeus too.. i love open toe shoes too and hills , but sometimes i wish i had more money to take her shopping and buy her the clothes that i want to.. She like the clothes I pick out for her , i also like when she gets her nails done too. what I wish she would do more would have to be cooking ..but she's getting so much better at it ..


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## Loving Husband (Aug 3, 2009)

Sexy is an attitude. I have never seen my wife try to be sexy.. She has always been he submissive type with low confidence. Though for me sexy is using anything you got to try and turn him on.. Don't be afraid.. Be confident and open..


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

michzz said:


> She doesn't do anything, now want to.
> 
> It pretty much sucks.


ditto, in fact i think she must be trying to turn me off


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## Blaze (Sep 16, 2009)

I'm a woman, but I'm going to speak up for my husband here.

I do not purposely "do" anything but he really digs it when I am fresh out of the shower. If he even catches a glimpse of my freshly bathed flesh... that's it, I'm doomed. LOL!!


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## carmaenforcer (Mar 7, 2008)

> Originally Posted by michzz View Post
> She doesn't do anything, now want to.
> 
> It pretty much sucks.





okeydokie said:


> ditto, in fact i think she must be trying to turn me off


:iagree:

But from what I can remember from past relationships in which I was with a woman not only interested in her needs being met.

BJ's are all it takes to make me say WOW.

As far as what is sexy that is different for all men but one thing that a lot of men agree with is that Princes Lea two piece from return of the jedi or empire strikes back, just google Princes Lea gold bikini, but that or Wonder Woman outfit works for most men.


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

so it gets better than bunny slippers and a full length terry bathrobe?


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## carmaenforcer (Mar 7, 2008)

okeydokie said:


> so it gets better than bunny slippers and a full length terry bathrobe?


I haven't had sex in so long that, even that might get a rise out of my at this point. :rofl:

No but seriously I don't even care if it's my Wife in a ratty smell robe, in fact I rather it be someone else.

Now that would be hot.


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## chuckf75 (Sep 6, 2009)

My wife does a lot to keep her body looking good, working out. She knows the body type I like and delivers it. She is good to me through they day and this makes me want her at night. She wants me sexually and I always like that, I don't like coyness.


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## 3773519 (Sep 24, 2009)

I like this thread. Lord knows I am having trouble in this department. I wish my SO wouldnt be able to take his hands off my but it seems like im not all that i guess.


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

clean and trim is one thing. acting like there is nothing off limits, like a savage. talking dirty. dressing sexy........yeah, my wife isnt working very hard.....lol


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## MEM2020 (Aug 23, 2009)

DITTO - DITTO 

Wife comes to bed in a t-shirt and nice - minimal panties. At 47 looks so good - legs and ass still like when we met back in the summer of 88. 

I crave her like a drug. She finds my 17 year old boyish passion mostly amusing and somewhat flattering. 










chuckf75 said:


> My wife does a lot to keep her body looking good, working out. She knows the body type I like and delivers it. She is good to me through they day and this makes me want her at night. She wants me sexually and I always like that, I don't like coyness.


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## mae (Aug 17, 2009)

OK, not to get gross here, but what if you have stretch marks? I am exercising and doing whatever possible to lose my pregnancy weight and I am losing weight every week, but I have stretch marks on my tummy and thighs, so I have a lot of attention on going to bed in just underwear. Do things like that usually matter?

I know that sexy is an attitude as well, but even when I've not put so much attention on it and even when I've felt sexy and gone to bed in just underwear (or nothing), my husband hasn't even really noticed.

Anyway, the suggestions are good. Keep them coming. Everyone is different so it will be good to have a bunch of different things to try.


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

mae said:


> OK, not to get gross here, but what if you have stretch marks? I am exercising and doing whatever possible to lose my pregnancy weight and I am losing weight every week, but I have stretch marks on my tummy and thighs, so I have a lot of attention on going to bed in just underwear. Do things like that usually matter?
> 
> I know that sexy is an attitude as well, but even when I've not put so much attention on it and even when I've felt sexy and gone to bed in just underwear (or nothing), my husband hasn't even really noticed.
> 
> Anyway, the suggestions are good. Keep them coming. Everyone is different so it will be good to have a bunch of different things to try.



if you act sexy you are sexy. dont be so self conscience. be confident, take control sometimes, show him you mean business.

neither me or my wife resemble our younger selves but that hasnt stopped me from desiring her (i cant say she still desires me)


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## revitalizedhusband (Feb 9, 2009)

mae said:


> OK, not to get gross here, but what if you have stretch marks? I am exercising and doing whatever possible to lose my pregnancy weight and I am losing weight every week, but I have stretch marks on my tummy and thighs, so I have a lot of attention on going to bed in just underwear. Do things like that usually matter?
> 
> I know that sexy is an attitude as well, but even when I've not put so much attention on it and even when I've felt sexy and gone to bed in just underwear (or nothing), my husband hasn't even really noticed.
> 
> Anyway, the suggestions are good. Keep them coming. Everyone is different so it will be good to have a bunch of different things to try.


Confidence is sexy.

My wife has had 3 kids, c-sections with each one, and 2 other abdominal surgeries. Her stomach is stretch mark "heaven" and she has the scars from the surgeries like road maps.

However, to me she is the most beautiful woman in the world and she went through all that "body disfigurement" to give me 3 wonderful boys.

Even with your stretch marks, if you came into the bedroom with lingerie on and just pushed your husband back on the bed and took advantage of him, oh good LORD would he find that VERY hot.

FYI, with stomach stretch marks, my wife's favorite lingerie that makes her confident/sexy is the ones that are called "teddys" I think, come with panties and the top looks like a see through bra but has a flowing "dress" that slightly opens in the middle that goes down to about the waist/hips. She loves these because she feels sexy and it still "covers" her stretch marks some.

Me? I'm like your husband, I don't even notice them, I love her body regardless.


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## Harvard (Aug 11, 2009)

I believe true beauty comes from within though stretch marks...that's a bummer. hang in there and love yourself! Project beauty and you will become beauty.


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## MEM2020 (Aug 23, 2009)

SORRY!! My bad. We have 3 kids. Of course my wife has stretch marks. And she is a little self conscious about them. I just laugh and say - God you are SO BEAUTIFUL - and those stretch marks are the little souvenirs our children left to show their passing. Thank you for giving me 3 wonderful children. 

As far as fitness goes - I did do a long post in response to a question asking for non shallow guys to respond. I do think that if your partner cares about fitness and they are fit, and you know they want you to be fit, that it shows love and commitment for you to stay fit for them. 





mae said:


> OK, not to get gross here, but what if you have stretch marks? I am exercising and doing whatever possible to lose my pregnancy weight and I am losing weight every week, but I have stretch marks on my tummy and thighs, so I have a lot of attention on going to bed in just underwear. Do things like that usually matter?
> 
> I know that sexy is an attitude as well, but even when I've not put so much attention on it and even when I've felt sexy and gone to bed in just underwear (or nothing), my husband hasn't even really noticed.
> 
> Anyway, the suggestions are good. Keep them coming. Everyone is different so it will be good to have a bunch of different things to try.


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## mae (Aug 17, 2009)

Wow. This makes me feel a lot better and gives me hope.


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## Mommybean (Jan 22, 2009)

I have stretch marks from our two sons. Would not trade them for the world, and NEITHER would my husband. He adored me pregant, and adores our beautiful boys. The stretch marks are just an outward symbol of what our love created. 
My H finds my confidence sexy...other than that, I will catch him looking at me sometimes, like when I am studying, and he says how attractive I look. Sexy IS an attitude. 
Of course, when I look at him and tell him how much I want to (insert anything sexual here)...well, yeah, he finds that sexy too....LOL!!


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## Racer (Sep 24, 2009)

mae said:


> What does your wife do that you think is sexy? What makes you go "WOW, my wife's hot!"? Or what are things you would like her to do that would make you feel that way?


For me it's the clothes. She has gotten good at wearing clothes that accent her curves and downplay things like her strechmarks and "thunder thighs" (her words, not mine). She used to come home and change into baggy sweats and sweatshirt without a bra (yuck). Now it's low cut jeans, pushup bra and t-shirt during cold days, or athletic top and shorts on nice days; and leaving the makeup on. Used to be ratty old t-shirt or tanktop and nasty baggy pj bottoms or sweats. Now it's nicer pj bottoms and nicer matching pj top. 
It's also the way she does things in clothes she knows gets my attention. Like wearing a v-neck thing then bending in while I'm sitting to give me a kiss with a view.. Getting down on all fours to play with the dogs, etc... Basically, giving me just a hint of "unmentionable's" flesh is better than walking around nude. Better yet is when I'm allowed to undress her. 

Bottom line is that she still dresses to impress me (and other's) and I find this very sexy.


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## sjm1983 (Sep 18, 2009)

I don't know what to say about this one. Everything she does is sexy to me. When she isn't trying is when she is the most sexy to me.


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## hoping (Sep 28, 2009)

at this point, if my wife did ANY thing i would find it sexy but, she has recently taken to trying to learn belly dancing, and let me tell you, OMFG i will be throbbing painfully for hours after watching her for just a few moments... 

and yes we have three kids, i love her stretch marks and have told her several times but she does not like them and feels like they make her ugly.. it is all about perseption.. when she dances, she is filled with a confidence that just radiates from her... but she would NEVER where a simpy thing that lets her belly show and when she does... well it's not really sexxy... nacked is sexy.. dressed is sexy... but there is something about the way she carries herself when her belly shows that turns me off and as i mention.. the stretch martks are actually a turn on for me.. only with her but still a turn on none the less 

and let me just say again... belly dancing.... OMFG HOT!!!!!!!!!


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## revitalizedhusband (Feb 9, 2009)

I would love if my wife took a belly dancing class...that's a really good one.


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## mae (Aug 17, 2009)

I actually took a belly dancing class once with my sisters, it was too embarrassing though. We couldn't stop cracking up. LOL.

I guess along the same lines, have any of you ever found your wife unattractive? If so, what were the reasons? 

It just feels like I'm trying and I don't feel like he's budging. I'm going to go out at get some new lingerie this weekend but I've done that in the past and he doesn't seem to notice. Not sure what to do. I can't seem to build my self esteem when the person who is supposed to find me attractive shows me that he doesn't find me attractive.

Hope I'm not bugging you guys too much. You are giving great answers.


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## joevn (Oct 23, 2009)

Whoever said confidence is sexy is right.

My wife took me to the airport on a recent trip. I drove the car. About 1 mile from the airport, she took off her panties and bra while seating in the passenger seat, stuffed them in my shirt pocket and whispered "something for you to think about." Of course I couldn't do anything about it, being that I have to catch the flight and we were driving. But I stuffed them in my luggage, thinking how hot that was.

Of course I slept in the hotel room with her panties and bra under my pillow. Makes those long business meetings more bearable, knowing there is something intimate of my wife waiting for me back at the hotel. No, I'm not a cross-dresser but yes, I enjoyed their feel on my face and their scent.

She's 46, and we've been married for 17 years. Two kids, stretch marks and tummy and all, and still the hottest babe I know.


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## joevn (Oct 23, 2009)

mae said:


> I actually took a belly dancing class once with my sisters, it was too embarrassing though. We couldn't stop cracking up. LOL.
> 
> I guess along the same lines, have any of you ever found your wife unattractive? If so, what were the reasons?
> 
> ...


Not unattractive but I don't think about her or being attracted to her as much. If that makes sense.

Usually that's when we drifted apart. Too much work, too busy with life, or whatever. Usually some effort of courting and romancing on my part brings about reciprocation and we'll be back on track.

But I don't know what to tell you. I'm the "pursuer" in our marriage--the one who does the courting. That's the role I enjoy for the chase and the thrill of continuing to "win" her heart (by that, I mean keeping the temperature bubbling like 17-year-old lovers, not just lukewarm like a long friendship). 

I really don't know if it would work as well if my wife's the one who does the courting. That doesn't do anything for me. I like doing the pursuit. *shrug*


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## mae (Aug 17, 2009)

Alright, so here's what I'm currently doing. Tell me if this is a good plan. 

1. I have completely backed of and am not "pursuing" him anymore.
2. I bought some sexy nighties I have been wearing for the last few nights instead of my usual boring t-shirt and sweats.
3. I am working on dressing nicer and doing my hair nicer.
4. Still being affectionate but not trying for sex at all.

Is this a good plan? Should it get him to start reaching more?


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## joevn (Oct 23, 2009)

mae said:


> OK, not to get gross here, but what if you have stretch marks? I am exercising and doing whatever possible to lose my pregnancy weight and I am losing weight every week, but I have stretch marks on my tummy and thighs, so I have a lot of attention on going to bed in just underwear. Do things like that usually matter?


Personally, it doesn't matter to me. But we have a lot of history...and my hair and abs are not exactly what they were 20 years ago either. 

I feel sorry for guys who focus on those things. They are setting themselves up for sure disappointment. Gravity spares no one but good attitude can beat it.


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## tfrankish11 (Nov 2, 2009)

my wife doesn't do anything. I think she is very sexy and i would love for her to do SOMETHING...ANYTHING...but it's not her style.


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## mae (Aug 17, 2009)

Talked to hubby a couple nights ago about this. He was trying to have sex with me and I said no because he has been treating me poorly and has been making me feel like crap. I told him I felt like he didn't want to have sex with ME, that he was just horny. He told me this has been the case recently.

I asked if he found me attractive. He said he usually finds me unattractive and I still needed to lose weight, though I have been losing weight. I told him he was being very shallow and he agreed. 

So, we have some things to definitely work out. We have an appointment with a chaplain this Saturday.

Then last night I went to bed with no pants on, just my undies. He he he. Apparently that was enough. We had some great "make-up" sex.


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## artieb (Nov 11, 2009)

Normally I'm pretty attentive and affectionate, but some years ago the company I was working for was failing in the dot-com bust and I'd been working 70 hours a week. It was awful and I was completely distracted. ANYWAY, my wife got in bed naked and holding a vibrator. Turned it on and started using it. I'm not sure how to describe my reaction, but she looked at me and said something like "My previous efforts to get your attention have apparently been too subtle, so I was hoping this might make my intentions clear."

It did, and I finally got off that sinking ship before it sank my relationship with it.


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## Figs (Dec 2, 2009)

Blaze said:


> I'm a woman, but I'm going to speak up for my husband here.
> 
> I do not purposely "do" anything but he really digs it when I am fresh out of the shower. If he even catches a glimpse of my freshly bathed flesh... that's it, I'm doomed. LOL!!




i agree!! :smthumbup: when my wife comes out wearing a towel around her body and her long slick wet hair running down her back, really turns me on and she smells so good too.


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## joevn (Oct 23, 2009)

mae said:


> Then last night I went to bed with no pants on, just my undies. He he he. Apparently that was enough. We had some great "make-up" sex.


Lose the pants helps. My wife sleeps naked and very rarely--with just panties.


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## triton1984 (Nov 20, 2009)

mae said:


> Talked to hubby a couple nights ago about this. He was trying to have sex with me and I said no because he has been treating me poorly and has been making me feel like crap. I told him I felt like he didn't want to have sex with ME, that he was just horny. He told me this has been the case recently.
> 
> I asked if he found me attractive. He said he usually finds me unattractive and I still needed to lose weight, though I have been losing weight. I told him he was being very shallow and he agreed."
> 
> ...


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## larniegrl (Oct 7, 2009)

triton1984...that is very true about working to not turn down your partners advances. My hubby turned me down frequently for over a year when we first got married...and it tore out that "free-spirited" sexuality. 

I still have it inside...but it is not aimed at him.


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