# Question for other men. If you found out your SO was...



## richie33 (Jul 20, 2012)

Looking at online images of men who were well hung and porn videos of men 
who are larger than themselves, would it bother them? Also there is no history 
of affairs, emotional or physical. Sex life is still very high.
Its a debate between myself and my wife. I told my wife I wouldn't have a problem
with it. As men we are visual creatures and as long as our sex life was not affected
I wouldn't have a problem. This is not a debate about if porn is right or wrong. 
Its just a question to men if this would bother them and hurt their self esteem.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## 40isthenew20 (Jul 12, 2012)

If my wife was looking at just random pictures of guys, then no. But if it was from an onlin dating type of site (regardless of her explanation), my antennas would go up. 

When I look at hot women online, it means nothing other than I'm perverted (which I freely admit). If she's getting hot looking at Johnny but banging you two hours later, who s it hurting?


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## richie33 (Jul 20, 2012)

Strictly porn and other online images. No dating sites. I agree it wouldn't affect me. If it gets her hot 
and makes her want to jump me all the better.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## MrK (Sep 2, 2010)

If my wife was also sexually attracted to me, then no. As it is, where she hasn't shown an interest in me for 20 years or so, I'd throw her out of the house.


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## JayFOxx (Sep 15, 2012)

I think porn of any kind can be a healthy form of expression as long as it isn't a disruption or an intrusion on a healthy relationship. Dating sites, message boards where photos are exchanged are a no go. Perhaps it would help for her to discuss whatever fantasies that go are associated with thesse pictures would help?


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## richie33 (Jul 20, 2012)

This is not happening in my marriage. I have been guilty in the past of looking at porn. Its hurt my wife's self esteem.
We are in therapy, working things out. But we were debating if the shoe was on the other foot would have it bothered me.
I told her as long as our sex life was good I wouldn't have a problem.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## jaquen (Mar 1, 2012)

It's taken a long time, but I'm very secure in my size. If she's looking at pictures of men even larger than I am, she can have at it. I know she loves what I'm working with, and now so do I. There's really no reason to be insecure.


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## aribabe (Aug 9, 2012)

I think some of you guys are being a little less than honest

I'm a porn watcher, at least twice a week. Husband is as well, I'm cool with it. Whatever. My husband and I have a very active sex life, I'm 22, he's 30. We have sex at least 3 times a week.

But when he found the pics i'd downloaded of a particular male porn star. He was not ok with it at all. The pics were very sexy and the man was just beautiful, young, muscular, toned, dark skinned guy, thick and long. My husband seemed very distraught about it...
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## richie33 (Jul 20, 2012)

aribabe is good to hear your input. When you say distraught what do you mean? Did it affect his/ your sex life? Did he now want to get a penis enlargement?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## aribabe (Aug 9, 2012)

I don't think it affected our sex life

I do know that it affected his self esteem. My husband does not have the body of a 25 year old african adonis, he's got a little tummy and could probably stand to lose 50lbs or so. He started having sex with his shirt on, not letting me watch him shower.

My husband is very blessed in the length dept. to say the least, so I don't think he was concered about th guys length.



richie33 said:


> aribabe is good to hear your input. When you say distraught what do you mean? Did it affect his/ your sex life? Did he now want to get a penis enlargement?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## jaquen (Mar 1, 2012)

aribabe said:


> I don't think it affected our sex life
> 
> I do know that it affected his self esteem. My husband does not have the body of a 25 year old african adonis, he's got a little tummy and could probably stand to lose 50lbs or so. He started having sex with his shirt on, not letting me watch him shower.
> 
> ...


But this thread is about women looking at pictures of men specifically who are well hung, and more largely endowed.

This thread is not about how a man would feel if he found out his wife was looking at pictures of men for all the reasons you stated above.

Perhaps the reactions would be totally different if that were question posed. But it wasn't, and so people responded according to the topic of this thread.


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## aribabe (Aug 9, 2012)

The guy was well hung, slightly larger than my husband as well, my husband is maybe 8 inches i'd guess, the porn star maybe 9 or 10.

I don't think my husband was concerned about the guys' length, obviously I don't know for certain but I don't see why that would be a concern for him.

But he does have issues with his own body, so it makes sense to me that that would be the thing that would bother him.



jaquen said:


> But this thread is about women looking at pictures of men specifically who are well hung, and more largely endowed.
> 
> This thread is not about how a man would feel if he found out his wife was looking at pictures of men for all the reasons you stated above.
> 
> Perhaps the reactions would be totally different if that were question posed. But it wasn't, and so people responded according to the topic of this thread.


_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## richie33 (Jul 20, 2012)

aribabe does your husband save pictures of women on his computer? If so how does it make you feel?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## jaquen (Mar 1, 2012)

aribabe said:


> The guy was well hung, slightly larger than my husband as well, my husband is maybe 8 inches i'd guess, the porn star maybe 9 or 10.
> 
> I don't think my husband was concerned about the guys' length, obviously I don't know for certain but I don't see why that would be a concern for him.
> 
> ...


Exactly. For my own response I wouldn't have an issue with the size of the penis, as I'm straight on that.

Now if I found out my wife was becoming addicted to looking at a specific porn star, who had physical attributes that struck to my own insecurities, that would be a problem.

Though honestly the reaction wouldn't be me begging her to stop. It would be me getting my ass in gear, and working harder to finish developing a physique I'm proud of. Feeling good, and comfortable, in your own skin is the the cure for all insecurities.


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## aribabe (Aug 9, 2012)

He saves pics/vids of women on his cell. I don't take issue with it. I also save pics of scantily clad women on my phone, a photo of selita ebanks in a swimsuit (a supermodel) is actually saved as my phone desktop background.

I do get insecure sometimes when he points out women in "real life" that he thinks are attractive.



richie33 said:


> aribabe does your husband save pictures of women on his computer? If so how does it make you feel?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## grenville (Sep 21, 2011)

richie33 said:


> Looking at online images of men who were well hung and porn videos of men
> who are larger than themselves, would it bother them? Also there is no history
> of affairs, emotional or physical. Sex life is still very high.
> Its a debate between myself and my wife. I told my wife I wouldn't have a problem
> ...


I think if I had a smaller than average one then it might make me feel a bit insecure. Thankfully I'm normally endowed so it wouldn't bother me at all.


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## 40isthenew20 (Jul 12, 2012)

When I look at porn, the women have larger breasts than my wife and are three-input bisexual women that squirt like a fire hydrant. It's all for the fantasy and masturbating. 

If I saw my wife playing with herself to fat, nerdy guys, I would think it was very odd. Of course people are going to jerk to attractive bodies - albeit it male (for women) or females (for guys). 

A husband that shows jealousy of his wife watching porn is immature to begin with, then a total loser if he begins picking apart what the porn stars look like and do self comparisons.


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## Drover (Jun 11, 2012)

Only if she wasn't having sex with me.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

I'm all good with my old lady rubbing one out to some gaint shlong, as long as I don't have to share and I keep getting mine then its all good.

I'd be a hybocriate if I said anything different!


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## DH1971 (Sep 15, 2012)

I would be worried


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## Mr Blunt (Jul 18, 2012)

If I had to vote for the most honest post on this thread it would be the one below:
JMO



> Quote of Aribabe
> I think some of you guys are being a little less than honest
> 
> I'm a porn watcher, at least twice a week. Husband is as well, I'm cool with it. Whatever. My husband and I have a very active sex life, I'm 22, he's 30. We have sex at least 3 times a week.
> ...


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## aribabe (Aug 9, 2012)

Thanks Mr.Blunt 

I think it's easy for most of the guys to say they wouldn't mind/care because their wives are not actually ding it now. My husband still insists that he "doesn't care" despite the obvious changes he's made, like having sex with me with a shirt on.

I think if the majority of the "non carers crew"actully found their wives regularly masturbating, to the point of saving pictures of him, to a young, hard bodied, muscular, well hung stud, they would start to care more than a little bit. Especially since most married men have tummies that poke out a bit more than they used to, or should lol...



Mr Blunt said:


> If I had to vote for the most honest post on this thread it would be the one below:
> JMO


_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## jaquen (Mar 1, 2012)

Again, Aribabe's comment is true...if that were the point of this thread. If the OP had broadened his criteria beyond the wife looking for the sake of a large penis, and a large penis alone, then I'd pen a gold metal on Aribabe because her post does speak to common insecurities a lot of men have, but won't acknowledge.

I know personally if my wife was looking at a man solely to admire his larger penis that wouldn't be a sticking point at all because I have no reason to feel insecure in that department. But I do have other body image issues that would be sparked if she were checking out pics of men who have attractive body parts that prick my own insecurities.


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## aribabe (Aug 9, 2012)

The op said nothing about them looking for the solely for the sake of seeing a large penis, he said the pornstars just happened to be more well hung than the husbands, and the wives were looking.

Since most well known male pornstars are also young, hardbodied, tan/darkskinned, and sexy as h*ll, it can be assumed that the porn guy that the wife is looking at is all those things as well, and he also has a big d*ck.

Most married guys are more plump and plush, than hardbodied adonis. And since most men have 5/6 inch penises, they certainly can't measure up to a long, think pornstar.

I think it's easy to say, "oh, I wouldn't care if she looked", when she's not. But when you read through her browser history and it say's "young, muscular bbc" or "young, big d*cked, greek god", suddenly your 5 inch penis and beer gut start making you feel just a tiny bit insecure.



jaquen said:


> Again, Aribabe's comment is true...if that were the point of this thread. If the OP had broadened his criteria beyond the wife looking for the sake of a large penis, and a large penis alone, then I'd pen a gold metal on Aribabe because her post does speak to common insecurities a lot of men have, but won't acknowledge.
> 
> I know personally if my wife was looking at a man solely to admire his larger penis that wouldn't be a sticking point at all because I have no reason to feel insecure in that department. But I do have other body image issues that would be sparked if she were checking out pics of men who have attractive body parts that prick my own insecurities.


_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## jaquen (Mar 1, 2012)

aribabe said:


> The op said nothing about them looking for the solely for the sake of seeing a large penis, he said the pornstars just happened to be more well hung than the husbands, and the wives were looking.


Like I've said several times, you make excellent points.

However you are wrong about the original post.

_"Looking at online images of men *who were well hung* and porn videos of men 
*who are larger than themselves*, would it bother them? Also there is no history 
of affairs, emotional or physical. Sex life is still very high.
Its a debate between myself and my wife. I told my wife I wouldn't have a problem
with it. As men we are visual creatures and as long as our sex life was not affected
I wouldn't have a problem. This is not a debate about if porn is right or wrong. 
Its just a question to men if this would bother them and hurt their self esteem."_

There is nothing in the OP about what you're referring to. He did not say anything about adonis men who"just happen" to have large penises. This thread is about penises. If the thread were about just men with great bodies/looks there wouldn't have been even any need to limit to porn. Because there are lots of dudes in porn who look pretty average, but happen to have large ****s. If the OP intended this to be about something greater than just a woman craving large c*ock than he should have clarified, because the rest of the men in this thread actually addressed the singular original point.


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## aribabe (Aug 9, 2012)

Maybe my reading comprehnsion skills are lacking but I'm not sure why him saying the men have larger penises means the men don't also have amazing bodies that the women are looking at.

There is no reference of exclusion anywhere in the op, yet you've imagined one jaquen, even in your italicized examples there isn't one. There is no use of the world "only", "solely", "just", "for this purpose, and no other".

All he said was the men were well hung, had larger penises than the husbands, and the wives were looking at those men. Those pornstars can sill have larger penises (and they probably do) and the wives can still look, and the pornstars can still have touchable, lickable bodies lol.

I'd really prefer not to get into a merry go round of semantics... so I won't 
But... if you've got anymore opinions pertaining to the topic, i'd love to hear them



jaquen said:


> Like I've said several times, you make excellent points.
> 
> However you are wrong about the original post.
> 
> ...


_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## lalsr1988 (Apr 16, 2012)

personally I would tell my wife if she wants to look at other guys , she can do it all she wants , but without me. Deal breaker for me , I'm gone. Call it insecurity if you like , doesn't matter. I wouldn't put up with it.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## aribabe (Aug 9, 2012)

Insecurity is normal/natural. Nothing wrong with it as long as it's not excessive or unfounded. I would say insecurity that's caused by wife your looking at hot, sexy guys and masturbating to them as being "founded" insecurity.

Are you also opposed to yourself checking out other women? Or is that ok?



lalsr1988 said:


> personally I would tell my wife if she wants to look at other guys , she can do it all she wants , but without me. Deal breaker for me , I'm gone. Call it insecurity if you like , doesn't matter. I wouldn't put up with it.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## lalsr1988 (Apr 16, 2012)

aribabe said:


> Insecurity is normal/natural. Nothing wrong with it as long as it's not excessive or unfounded. I would say insecurity that's caused by wife your looking at hot, sexy guys and masturbating to them as being "founded" insecurity.
> 
> Are you also opposed to yourself checking out other women? Or is that ok?
> 
> ...



Are you asking if I watch porn and jerk off to other hot sexy women? The answer is no
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## richie33 (Jul 20, 2012)

It was just a silly debate between my wife and I. Basically since she says I looked at pornstars with fake boobs thats what I liked
I am a ass man but not many pornstars have real boobs. So we debated since I am not hung like Lexington Steel would I be upset if I were to find she was looking at porn with guys with really big penises.
I said if you were too I would have not problem with it. As long as our sex life was as hot as its been. Again it was a silly debate.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## richie33 (Jul 20, 2012)

"Most married men are plump and plush". I will only let my wife watch Ron Jeremy movies. That way I will still feel great. The hedgehog can make no one jealous.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## 40isthenew20 (Jul 12, 2012)

Guys need to have a little more self confidence or quit hitting the drive-thru for lunch and dinner. Even if your wife isn't looking at men in porn, you don't think that she's fantasizing about the guys in her soap operas?


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## Aggie (Sep 5, 2012)

I would like to say that I would be secure enough to not care, but I can't.

The main problem is that I couldn't completely compete with those pornstars. Yes, I could work out and get into better shape to a certain extent, but I can't make my penis longer or get a dimple on my a**.

I bet a large part of the reason women get insecure about it are for the same reasons, but just different body parts.


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## KathyBatesel (Apr 26, 2012)

richie33 said:


> It was just a silly debate between my wife and I. Basically since she says I looked at pornstars with fake boobs thats what I liked
> I am a ass man but not many pornstars have real boobs. So we debated since I am not hung like Lexington Steel would I be upset if I were to find she was looking at porn with guys with really big penises.
> I said if you were too I would have not problem with it. As long as our sex life was as hot as its been. Again it was a silly debate.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


It's pretty tough to say how you'd react if you haven't been through it.

My bet is your wife would be better able to anticipate just how much it would affect you because she's seen how you're affected by many things in your life as an objective party. You can not be objective about yourself. (Meaning "you" anyone... not "you" specifically.)

It might not bother you IF things were otherwise perfect. But if there is even a small fracture in your sex life - like she turns you down just once - it can lead to a lot of self-questioning.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

richie33 said:


> Looking at online images of men who were well hung and porn videos of men
> who are larger than themselves, would it bother them? Also there is no history
> of affairs, emotional or physical. Sex life is still very high.
> Its a debate between myself and my wife. I told my wife I wouldn't have a problem
> ...


I can answer this easily for my husband...never bothered him at all ...he found it amusing when I wanted to rent porn - told me to go for it .... This was an about face from my Good Girl days, he was all over that. He knows I only want to watch it together anyway...

I highly enjoyed that --but what a challenge to find the softer romantic stuff...so hit or miss. Half of them we didn't even watch. 

Heck, they'll ALL bigger than him... when we'd see an average (I should say when I did) -half the time he was not watching but keeping his focus on me, I'd point him out and say... "Look the average Guys do porn too". 

It means nothing- really....If your wife orgasms & is wild to have sex with you... you got it in the Bag. 

My husband is turned off by Fake Boobs, just as I am by too many muscles on a man... he doesn't like tattoos, I don't care for bald men... 

Speaking from a visual woman's perspective...It was NEVER the penis size that caught my eye... it was solely his LOOKS... and his MOVES... I always went for the long haired porn stars. 

Like this one >>







He is into Cooking now, a Chef - and he cut the hair.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

richie33 said:


> "Most married men are plump and plush". I will only let my wife watch Ron Jeremy movies. That way I will still feel great. The hedgehog can make no one jealous.


 I'd have to agree there....After so much renting... I learned who this man was...for the life of me, I couldn't understand what in the world he was doing in Porn, maybe he was hot at one time, but I think he needed to step out of the business. 

There was this other one -constantly in PlayGirl ... we started calling him THE OLD MAN... he was sooo HAIRY too...The skip botton got alot of play when he showed up.


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## IrishGirlVA (Aug 27, 2012)

I think my ex boyfriend, who is not very large in that area, would be terribly upset if I watched men in porn with larger members. 

But here's the thing --- 

1) Larger size men scare me and 2) half the time I can't see it anyway because it's buried somewhere!


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## Mr.UK007 (Sep 17, 2012)

I think it would depend upon motive for looking. Self pleasure solo, yes it would. It would hurt me that she would rather look at pictures and pleasure herself rather than invovle me.


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## aribabe (Aug 9, 2012)

Do you think that married women should never masturbate?



Mr.UK007 said:


> I think it would depend upon motive for looking. Self pleasure solo, yes it would. It would hurt me that she would rather look at pictures and pleasure herself rather than invovle me.


_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## jaquen (Mar 1, 2012)

aribabe said:


> But... if you've got anymore opinions pertaining to the topic, i'd love to hear them
> 
> 
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Nope, if the OP is talking about the criteria you inferred, no I don't. You did a good job at outlining how I feel.


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## jaquen (Mar 1, 2012)

richie33 said:


> It was just a silly debate between my wife and I. Basically since she says I looked at pornstars with fake boobs thats what I liked
> I am a ass man but not many pornstars have real boobs. So we debated since I am not hung like Lexington Steel would I be upset if I were to find she was looking at porn with guys with really big penises.
> I said if you were too I would have not problem with it. As long as our sex life was as hot as its been. Again it was a silly debate.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Thank you for clarifying this. This is what I thought you meant by the OP. This was a conversation about large penises, and not the overall package. Because Lexington Steele, without his famous package, isn't exactly the kind of man most men would be intimidated by in the looks/body department.


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## aribabe (Aug 9, 2012)

My goodness, that is one sexy man.
:allhail:



SimplyAmorous said:


> Like this one >>
> 
> 
> 
> ...


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## oldgeezer (Sep 8, 2012)

richie33 said:


> Looking at online images of men who were well hung and porn videos of men
> who are larger than themselves, would it bother them? Also there is no history
> of affairs, emotional or physical. Sex life is still very high.
> Its a debate between myself and my wife. I told my wife I wouldn't have a problem
> ...


Well, I'd laugh till I cried, or until her foot connected with my maleness for laughing, because she SWEARS that "the size doesn't matter, she isn't in the slightest bit turned on by size". 

So, having caught her violating one of her pet peeves (why do guys have to stare at big boobs ) She'd know she was busted, and actually reinforcing a stereotype she claims she hates. 

So... If this were to become some kind of obsession with her? It certainly would have some kind of impact, but what, I don't know, because I've not had it before and I don't feel like investing energy in imagining it.


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## oldgeezer (Sep 8, 2012)

richie33 said:


> "Most married men are plump and plush". I will only let my wife watch Ron Jeremy movies. That way I will still feel great. The hedgehog can make no one jealous.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I just have to say, you cracked me up so bad I haven't been able to stop laughing in 10 minutes! 

( It also wouldn't have been half as funny, if I hadn't seem some stupid ad somewhere with his picture on it. I didn't know who he was until a few years ago, when I stumbled across an INTERVIEW with him on HBO of all places...)


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## sandc (Dec 15, 2011)

My wife doesn't know that they come any bigger than mine. Don't tell her!


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## tonyarz (Sep 15, 2012)

It wouldn't bother me in the least if my wife was looking at pictures of various Johnson's. She can dream can't she? lol


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## jaquen (Mar 1, 2012)

aribabe said:


> My goodness, that is one sexy man.
> :allhail:


Alright Aribabe, you're getting caught up! We might have to peel you off the ceiling soon!


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## aribabe (Aug 9, 2012)

I don't get it.... lol. I really don't :rofl:


jaquen said:


> Alright Aribabe, you're getting caught up! We might have to peel you off the ceiling soon!


_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## jaquen (Mar 1, 2012)

aribabe said:


> I don't get it.... lol. I really don't :rofl:
> 
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I think I know what, or who, to get you for your next birthday!

:rofl:


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## jaquen (Mar 1, 2012)

But let's expand on Aribabe's point.

What if you found out your wife was becoming hooked on looking at pictures of men who had the full and complete package (however she defines that)? Let's say she's developed a fixation on a man who not only has a c*ck larger than yours, but also her idea of the perfect body, face, and attitude. 

Would that be intimidating? What that spark you fellas' jealousy? And if so, would you let her know?


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## Dad&Hubby (Aug 14, 2012)

jaquen said:


> But let's expand on Aribabe's point.
> 
> What if you found out your wife was becoming hooked on looking at pictures of men who had the full and complete package (however she defines that)? Let's say she's developed a fixation on a man who not only has a c*ck larger than yours, but also her idea of the perfect body, face, and attitude.
> 
> Would that be intimidating? What that spark you fellas' jealousy? And if so, would you let her know?


For me it would be about the degree. 

The way it would bother me.
1. If she was spending 3 hours every night looking up these pictures, basically if it was more than casual looking.
2. If it was detracting from our time together, through either her secluding herself away from me during non-sexual times OR she was masturbating to it and not available to me as much.

The way it wouldn't bother me
If it was a normal healthy casual looking. That's normal.


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