# what more can you do...



## CD3122 (Dec 17, 2011)

I am 32 yr old and have been married almost 5 yrs and together for almost 8. The last few years have been more miserable then happy. I have tried numerous times to get him to wake up and see the big picture and have even suggested marriage counseling or anything at that point to make this work. He refused the marriage therapy but its getting to the point where I put the divorce off and I have no idea why. He says he loves me but never does anything or say anything to show it or prove it. I mean is it like this for everyone, are their any marriages out there that after a few years can honestly say are great? Anyone going through the ropes of divorce that can shed some light?


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## alphaomega (Nov 7, 2010)

Sometimes a man won't look inside himself until he's at that precipice and is forced to change. Until then, it's all business as usual. I couldn't change until I could see myself after separation.

There's no reason to not have a great marriage, but one person can't do all the lifting. It takes two.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Does he say that he's content?


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## Jazzie (Dec 17, 2011)

What reason did he give for refusing marriage counseling?


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## CD3122 (Dec 17, 2011)

He said Marriage counseling is a waste of time and it doesnt work and I said well how do you know if you dont try it? @ Alphaomega alot of friends tell me to do that, pick up and leave and he'll wake up and realize but does it really come down too that? He is content with who he is but I am not. 
I mean I am extremely independant I work fulltime job and full time mommy and not materialistic by any means I appreciate the finer things in life and I dont understand why this is so much work??? Thanks for the advice !


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## NotSoSureYet (Nov 10, 2011)

Your situation sounds a lot like mine.....One thing I still wish I would have done after my H refused MC, I should have gone to individual counseling!! I think it may have woke my H up to our issues before it had gotten so far gone.


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## CD3122 (Dec 17, 2011)

Are you still married? Have you done ind therapy? I wish they had group meetings for people like me and the situation. Who better to talk too then people that can relate..


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## NotSoSureYet (Nov 10, 2011)

CD3122 said:


> Are you still married? Have you done ind therapy? I wish they had group meetings for people like me and the situation. Who better to talk too then people that can relate..


We are still married. We have been trying to really reconcile for 3-4 weeks now. We have been talking about counciling again. The problem is that insurance won't cover any of it for us......so that's an issue.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## accept (Dec 1, 2011)

Well get your H to come here. He can have it free and anonymous. If you both come on I am sure you will do better here than at any counselor.


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