# I have evidence m



## lisa3girls (Apr 6, 2011)

the stupid ****ing pig.... love cards from her to him-- way back to July, his birthday. I HATE HIM.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Ewww. How'd you find them? And Lisa, try to stick to 1 thread. You have 3 going now and it's hard to keep up.


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## lisa3girls (Apr 6, 2011)

Jellybeans said:


> Ewww. How'd you find them? And Lisa, try to stick to 1 thread. You have 3 going now and it's hard to keep up.


Sorry-- I went through the bags on his motorcycle


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## Why Not Be Happy? (Apr 16, 2010)

That stinks! Hang in there! Has he tried to contact you at all?


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## lisa3girls (Apr 6, 2011)

Why Not Be Happy? said:


> That stinks! Hang in there! Has he tried to contact you at all?


No not since he left... I cannot help but think he is putting himself in quite a spot... what a moron


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## Why Not Be Happy? (Apr 16, 2010)

I agree with you.


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## HerToo (Oct 3, 2011)

Hopefully he feels like crap and is remorseful for the pain he is causing. And I hope the best for you.

I sent and received cards as well during my EA. And on my birthday too. I too am a moron, and every other label I have earned. 

But my wife and I are trying to fox things. It's hard on both of us. I don't know what the final outcome will be. I tell you this because I hope that somehow you and your H can fix things. But you need to decide what is truly going to make you happy. 

I hope the two of you talk soon. Despite how you feel about him now, and possibly in the future, you need to talk. It will help you develop a plan on what to do next. You are in 100% control now.


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## lisa3girls (Apr 6, 2011)

So, he came to our condo when I was gone and took all his clothing and such... totally emptied his dresser and closet. So I texted him and asked him why he couldn't at least FACE us, explain to the children etc. He said he got a clear message from me when he found his toothbrush and such on our bedroom floor (yes, in a fit, I threw hit **** around-- seriously do you BLAME me?).

I explained I was hurting and blindsided and seriously what did he expect.-- and see this kind of thing (his assuming and not communicating to me) is why we are here... I wasn't sending him ANY message. I told him what I expected, and I was waiting for his answer. So he said no counseling his heart isn't in it. I had to tell the girls he wasn't coming back... they lost it (here I am cleaning up the manure pile he made again). 

So today, he picked up one of the girls for Lacrosse-- I really didn't want him to... I was pissed, but she wanted to see him, so I allowed it. I asked him where he was staying, and discovered he has moved in with the girlfriend, honestly, what a kick--- he claims I make him feel bad about himself because I am the breadwinner etc and he goes from my house to hers??? This is different exactly how?

Then he tried to tell me that it was NOBODY's fault we were here now, it is just what it is-- I called BS on that... it was HIS fault and I told him the least he could freaking do is man the hell up and ADMIT HE caused this. Then he told me I needed to be civil and I told him I owed him nothing of the sort right now.

Lastly, I demanded that he go see my 17 year old who is a wreck over this... not a note, not a text, go SEE her and talk to her. Go clean up your manure pile man. UGH


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## HerToo (Oct 3, 2011)

I'm so sorry. He has no one to blame but himself. You had every right to throw things, and act out in any manner that didn't involve physical violence. My wife punched a solid door.

He could at lest see that you are hurting and apologize for the pain he is causing you and your daughters. I think it was a good idea to let him pick up the one daughter. Then he can see first hand the pain he is causing, and that his time for being a dad who is respected is gone. He's going to break down big time form that if he has any form of a heart.

I've been told that if a relationship is bad, either fix it or end it before starting a new one. I learned this after I was in my EA already. So I blame the guy in the mirror, no one else. I bet he will eventually blame himself.

I hope he at least comes crawling back with remorse, and asking for a another chance. You don't have to take him back, but it will help you see that he is hurting himself as well.

I feel for you and your daughters.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

I don't even know him and I'd love to kick his ass.

Sorry you are going through this. I know that pain. However, pick yourself up and tell him to EFF OFF. He's being a complete jackass.


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## NotLikeYou (Aug 30, 2011)

Lisa3girls- In reading up on your other threads and this one, it sounds like you are completely justified in your anger. You paint a picture of a husband with no redeeming values. 

Coming in and taking his stuff while no one was home was an act of total cowardice. He shows a strong aversion to conflict and dealing with you face-to-face after you discovered his ongoing affair.

When he told you to be civil, you absolutely spiked the football by telling him you owe him nothing of the sort right now. You have been horribly wronged, and it's important to pay him back as hard and fast as you can. 

I think it is really important that you continue to ride the wave of anger- there is a good chance that by doing so you will wash him completely out of your and your daughters' lives. And that's what you want, isn't it?


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## onthefence16 (Aug 21, 2011)

No anger is not the way.....stop being angry it isn't healthy for your children to see this...be the stonger one....show grace and peace...it WILL freak him out....when you show that you are moving on it stops them in their tracks if there is any love left for you and your girls in his heart.....I tried looking up the 180 rules but couldn't find them can someone post for her please....


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