# Wanting to watch my man have sexual relations with another girl



## PepsiGirl (Jan 31, 2010)

Okay this may sound weird but I want to watch my man have sexual relations with another women while I finger myself. I'm very happy with my man, we have great sex, 2 kids, a great life. On the other hand I do think if it does happen that it will ruin our marriage, but this is something that I have thought about many many times and just cant get out of my head. I have told him about this, but he thinks that its a joke or a little sexual game. So confused


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## 63Vino (Dec 23, 2009)

PepsiGirl said:


> Okay this may sound weird but I want to watch my man have sexual relations with another women while I finger myself. I'm very happy with my man, we have great sex, 2 kids, a great life. On the other hand I do think if it does happen that it will ruin our marriage, but this is something that I have thought about many many times and just cant get out of my head. I have told him about this, but he thinks that its a joke or a little sexual game. So confused


Your confused?!?!? HE's confused!!! 
Im laughing a bit while saying that as I have been told this exact thing recently and I'm trying to figure outif it REALLY what she wants and what the risks are. 
From my side Im quite shocked how worried I am about doing something that she's NOT really ready for. (im ready hahaha)
I think you should spend a LOT of time fantasizing WITH hubby and also much time by yourself imagining all the possible outcomes and scenarios.

What you guys ultimately decide together is all good. I think that IF you "go there" you NEED to be resolved BEFOREhand, that whatever happens and no matter how you feel afterward, your going to be able to keep perspective and he is also resolved to not do anything ever outside your (your's and his) collective play.

You obviously need to be careful on slection also, and usually that all but makes the whole thing impossible.

Im just saying you him and the other girl need to understand exactly what the "game" is, what's permitted, what's not and what is the stop word if someone feels uncomfortable.

You'll see than many people have this same desire so its not abnormal (as if there were such a thing).

I LOVE the idea.

Sorry for length. 
Have fun!

Not sure it matters, but Im interested to see if other females have this desire/request and how they felt afterward.


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## HappyAtLast (Jan 25, 2010)

There's nothing wrong about having fantasies, but this one is a bit tricky. It could possibly be o.k. to act out, but most likely, it could backfire. What would happen if he fell in love with her? What if he enjoyed it more than you did and wanted to do this again and again?
Something to think about before you make your fantasies a reality.


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## SweetiepieMI (Jan 22, 2010)

So I havent been on that end of the stick with a threesome where my hubs has sex with another woman.... I would definitely start there. I think my hubs and I went a bit too fast without talking about what would happen or having that"safe" word.

If I were you I would start with having a threesome but start with him having sex with YOU. If everything is still cool, then I think its be cool for him to have sex with her. But I wouldnt just rush into watching them without leading up to it.

Take it in steps, you never know how your going to react to watching such events. You dont want to go too fast and then regret the decision.....

just my opinion


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## Dancing Nancie (Jul 1, 2008)

I have a very close couple that I am friends with that are in a similar situation. She really enjoys watching him with someone else. She says she gets worked up just watching until she gets to the point she can't wait any longer and joins. It's something that works for some and just doesn't work for others. It really just depends. I know my wife wouldn't be able to stand even the thought of me with someone else, let alone watching.


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## laredo (Jan 23, 2010)

I bet if you arranged a lady and put in the position to do it, he would.


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## MrP.Bodybig (Jul 21, 2009)

My wife has the same FANTASY about me with another women but it is A FANTASY. Not saying that for you and him it's a bad idea. But I would tread softly because it's a slippery slope.


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## rick_bachman (Jan 27, 2010)

Well is this something you like to fantasize about or something you want to happen? Like there are times when I fantasize about having boobies because I can play with them all the time, but realistically it wouldn't make sense.

I think you need to take it slow and in steps, and watch the jealousy. Otherwise, nothing is wrong with your desires. I mean I fantasize about my wife with other men and being forced to serve their every whim, but realistically it's not something I want (right now)


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## artieb (Nov 11, 2009)

Could you put on a wig or something and film the two of you having sex, and then watch the video and pretend that the woman in the movie is someone else?


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## 63Vino (Dec 23, 2009)

artieb said:


> Could you put on a wig or something and film the two of you having sex, and then watch the video and pretend that the woman in the movie is someone else?


and then get us to rate the video?


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## chuckf75 (Sep 6, 2009)

My wife has the same fantasy and loves to tallk about it during sex. Of course she got her wish one time and we enjoyed it and there were no lingering problems with it at all. But you never know how this can effect a couple, it can be tricky!


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## 63Vino (Dec 23, 2009)

SO... Pepsigirl... Status?

Im curious as like I said. this is my situation also.. We have not pursued this yet. 

Have you?


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

chuckf75 said:


> My wife has the same fantasy and loves to tallk about it during sex. Of course she got her wish one time and we enjoyed it and there were no lingering problems with it at all. But you never know how this can effect a couple, it can be tricky!


well you lucky son of a.........DANG i am the unluckiest so and so


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## psychocandy (Apr 28, 2008)

PepsiGirl said:


> Okay this may sound weird but I want to watch my man have sexual relations with another women while I finger myself. I'm very happy with my man, we have great sex, 2 kids, a great life. On the other hand I do think if it does happen that it will ruin our marriage, but this is something that I have thought about many many times and just cant get out of my head. I have told him about this, but he thinks that its a joke or a little sexual game. So confused


How cool is this ???? :smthumbup::smthumbup::smthumbup:


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## CaliRN (Jan 2, 2010)

Great wife 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## steve71 (Feb 5, 2010)

PepsiGirl, it doesn't sound weird to me - I love these visual pleasures too. I've had occasional get-togethers with couples. I think you've been given good advice here, especially about the 'safe' word. And do remember you will cross a boundary and it might suddenly feel very scary on the other side. There are differences between our situations though - I haven't been in a loving relationship at the time and the situation can be volatile for the couple. Only you will know wether this should remain a rich source of private fantasy or wether your relationship is strong enough to cope with possibly very strong, unexpected feelings.


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## SweetiepieMI (Jan 22, 2010)

Ya, I may be awesome for you both, just start slow and MAKE SURE YOU HAVE THE SAFE WORD........

other than that, good times good tiems and have fun


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## x2startermom (Jan 8, 2010)

I want to have a threesome with my hubby. I've told him about me just watching him do another chick. We are both fine with this. 

Just discuss it until you both know what is going to happen and what it involves. Discuss till your blue in the face and quite sure that it isn't going to end up in something that you both will regret.


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## jhelene (Jan 28, 2010)

same situation here.. I plan on doing it but the girl i want to do it with is his ex girlfriend from when we were separated.. when him and i go back to gether he mentioned it several times and with is ex, but we never got that far because she mad him mad about some stuff...


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## jhelene (Jan 28, 2010)

i say go for it.. i am...we never will know the outcome until we try...


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## jackofhearts (Jun 24, 2011)

To date me and my wife have been with 6 women. The first time failed because we didnt establish rules. And have a safe word or safety plan in case one of us got uncomfortable. Another situation was one of the females fell in love with me. Kinda stalked us a little. Went as far as sending my wife an email saying if me and her got together could we all still be friends. And she had all this layed out in her mind without ever getting my input. Guess she thought she was just that good in bed lol. So my two biggest things to you would be set up boundaries and rules, the first time will more than likely not go perfect but it does get better the more you do it, each time you learn something new, and just be careful who you pick. Make sure you explain the rules to her. Dont let hubby do it. It needs to be you. Tell her how you want it to be. No kissing if theirs no kissing. No holding hands. No marks.... believe it or not my wife doesnt mind the actual intercourse taking place but marks are her territory as far as scratches and hickeys go. Also one big thing that has come up is stopping if something comes up where one person has to leave the room in the middle of it. It probably took a year of fantasizing about it and talking about it during sex before we were comfortable enough to try it. You just sitting there watching i dont think is a good idea though you should be involved someway. You cant leave oppurtunity for your mind to begin wandering in the middle of it. So keep yourself busy. A good way would be you being cameraman. You could then masturbate while you watch it and if you decided not to do it again you would at least have the video to fulfill the fantasy over and over again without having to do it again.


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## whammy (Apr 22, 2011)

I really dont have lot to back this up. But it my personal opinion that men really cant be pulled away from a relationship by this type of behavior. I dont think you have anything to worry about. I think a wife getting to sleep with another man is alot more vulnerable to having her husband lose value in her eyes when compared to wife losing value in her husbands eyes when he gets to sleep with another women...
hoefully thats makes sense.


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## 2nd_t!me iz_best (Feb 28, 2011)

SweetiepieMI said:


> Ya, I may be awesome for you both


does this sound like an offer to be the second woman to anybody else? :scratchhead:

syrum has had these fantasies as well about us being with a second woman...FANTASIES
this has also been put into play during 1 or 2 of our video sex sessions. it has also been discussed by us both that this will never happen IRL.
we would both be uncomfortable with this and agree that the negative effects to our relationship would not be worth it.

i know i could not watch her with another man.


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## Enchantment (May 11, 2011)

whammy said:


> I really dont have lot to back this up. But it my personal opinion that men really cant be pulled away from a relationship by this type of behavior. I dont think you have anything to worry about. I think a wife getting to sleep with another man is alot more vulnerable to having her husband lose value in her eyes when compared to wife losing value in her husbands eyes when he gets to sleep with another women...
> hoefully thats makes sense.


Huh? I think it can have detrimental effects in either direction.


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## SockPuppet (May 16, 2011)

MrP.Bodybig said:


> My wife has the same FANTASY about me with another women but it is A FANTASY. Not saying that for you and him it's a bad idea. But I would tread softly because it's a slippery slope.


I dont see whats so slippery? You can either remove emotional attachement from sex, or you cant.


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## whammy (Apr 22, 2011)

Enchantment said:


> Huh? I think it can have detrimental effects in either direction.


It can... But i think it is alot more likely that a married woman will give part of her heart, love, attraction, thoughts and whatever else to a man she gets to sleep with a legit chance that she may one day give it all to the man. But a married man (atleast me) can bend his secretary over his desk at 9am and will have already forgetten about it by lunch

What I am trying to say is that I think it is MUCH more likely, in the situation that OP hinted at, that the wife will fall for OM then husband will fall for OW


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

PepsiGirl said:


> Okay this may sound weird but I want to watch my man have sexual relations with another women while I finger myself. I'm very happy with my man, we have great sex, 2 kids, a great life. On the other hand I do think if it does happen that it will ruin our marriage, but this is something that I have thought about many many times and just cant get out of my head. I have told him about this, but he thinks that its a joke or a little sexual game. So confused


It's a fetish that comes from the natural ability to feel lust during jealousy. Same reason why the missus and I used to play the 'jealousy game' in the past to turn each other on for fun (and unfortunately leading on and teasing others who end up getting very frustrated :rofl: )

But as great as it will feel - you might explode with multiples and have the orgasms of your life, but it will hurt. Only very strong relationships should try swinging in my opinion - NEVER try it to 'fix' things because it WILL backfire.

For a safer alternative, play the jealousy game, throw in a bit of exhibitionism as well.


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## Laurae1967 (May 10, 2011)

Even some of the most solid, committed couples avoid having sex outside the marriage because nobody ever knows how they will react until they are in that situation. Maybe the husband would get jealous and feel insecure after watching his wife with someone else. Maybe the wife would feel resentful of the husband for his willingness to share her - like maybe he doesn't value her enough to want to keep her just to himself. Most people fantasize about threesomes, etc. but most people don't really want to go there because they don't want to put their marriage at risk. It's just not worth it for most committed couples.

But then again, some couples can do it. But it's a big gamble.


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