# ever heard anything like this?



## DeniseK (Jun 25, 2009)

I havent posted in a while. But this takes the cake.

I filed for divorce in august. We had our preliminary hearing on the 3rd. Child support was set...visitation. It almost killed me. He sat there under oath and swore there was no one else. He hadn't been texting that girl and promised to take a drug test. They never made him. And it was all dropped.

I hear a couple of weeks later that his father says I hit Nick and that was the reason for our divorce. Yeah right. This is where is gets weird......

The next time visitation rolls around...I insist he get them on Friday night like it is specified. I offer to meet him after the game and when he is off work. We agree......at our meeting he pitches a fit when I ask him to meet at W mart when I get them back. Words are exchanged...he goes nuts says I hit him with their bag and was threatening him. The kids witnessed his little tirade. He ended up refusing to take them and I left after he did. the next week he got them as planned but as i suggested, his mom and my mom did the exchanges.

But when mom went back to get them....she didn't see him pull up. He brought them back and let them out on the busy street an pulled off before she knew it....and there they were trying to open her door with dear old dad a half a mile away.

Last week....My lawyer runs into me and tells me that this guy...lets call him J.....called his office 2 times. J is nick's girlfriend's ex hubby. They just finalized and he used my same lawyer. So...he called twice and asked how soon MY divorce would be final. Lawyer says....we want it over soon as Nick does. But that isn't enough....J wanted to push the issue. Seems his ex wife wants this divorce over now. They even contacted Nick's lawyer....weird huh.

My BIL works with him and saw Nick and her together a few nights later....her up on the table in front of him...leaning down in his face and whispering in his ear. Every one laughed about it....like it was cute or something. come to find out....word was out a long time before I knew. Why didn't Iknow? Why is her ex calling my lawyer on her behalf about my divorce?


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## Corpuswife (Apr 24, 2009)

Maybe he's waiting to get on with his life?

I am not sure. Sounds a little Jerry Springer.


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## DeniseK (Jun 25, 2009)

yea....my thoughts. Jerry springer here we come...NOT. Something definately didn't smell right. then I thought...what if he was actually trying to help me out. I mean if he says she is wanting our divorce over...and he knows about this...it could be used in court.

Except...I don't care anymore. Just weirded me out. Even weirded out my lawyer. He hadn't ever had that kind of thing happen.


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## Treadingcarefully (Sep 1, 2009)

DeniseK said:


> I havent posted in a while. But this takes the cake.
> 
> I filed for divorce in august. We had our preliminary hearing on the 3rd. Child support was set...visitation. It almost killed me. He sat there under oath and swore there was no one else. He hadn't been texting that girl and promised to take a drug test. They never made him. And it was all dropped.
> 
> ...


Wow, what a d*ck. Did he leave them on a busy street or in a car park, close to her car? That's ridiculous and irresponsible? 
My wife and I separated about 10 times, and we NEVER treated the kids like that.


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## DeniseK (Jun 25, 2009)

no...he let them out on the busy street....and pulled away before they even got to my mom's car. He was at the redlight before she heard them trying to open her car door. He din't get out and make sure they got in safely. chicken...selfish ...jerk.


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## Treadingcarefully (Sep 1, 2009)

DeniseK said:


> no...he let them out on the busy street....and pulled away before they even got to my mom's car. He was at the redlight before she heard them trying to open her car door. He din't get out and make sure they got in safely. chicken...selfish ...jerk.


How old is this guy? Jerk is too nice a word for that type of behaviour. I would rather endure cold stares or harsh words from my mother in law, than put my kids at risk of being run over or something. I mean, there's angry behaviour, but then there's downright self-centred and irresponsible behaviour. I hope you roasted him for that. Whatever about his relationship with you, he should treat his kids right.

Was he always this bad? Or was he the type who was fine so long as things were fine... not one of the 'in good times and in bad characters'. 

Sounds like your better off without him in your life. 
I'd hate to say that maybe he shouldn't have access, but I know that if I was that careless with my daughters my wife wouldn't let me take them for an hour, never mind a day. 

Hope things start to improve for you, really do.


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## DeniseK (Jun 25, 2009)

Uh....too much about him to even begin to explain. But he is very irresponsible with the boys. But....I brough up similar incidents in our preliminary hearing and it fell on def ears. So...I must let them go or face the firing squad on sept 21st at our final hearing. He has accused me of hitting him (such a lie) He is 245lbs of steroid muscle and I am 127 ....fragile. I never hit him....and wouldn't. My sis in law said she was more afraid of my 8 year old. Not even my kids are afraid of me...But they love me.

And I can't even talk to him...he blocks my calls. And I can only text him when he texts me first....Not that I care..the only thing I have to discuss with him are the children. My mom and his mom have to meet to swap them....cause he doesn't trust ME. And I do not even understand why. 

He isn't a hang through the bad times kinda guy for sure....except his bad times. I am better off without him in my life...but confused as heck what is going on...


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## DeniseK (Jun 25, 2009)

me either. My mom has contemplated calling defacs on him. He use to scare the boys with masks and I had no idea that he had frightened my baby...when he was 3...to the point he peed on himself. It was when I was at work and they never told me...but they told her. We use to fight about that stupid mask...its scary to the kids adn they don' tlike it....when he left....it stayed and the boys adn I laughed as we threw it in the trash. It was a good moment for us all. he is unstable to say the least...but all the judge cared about was that I let the boys go with him and that he pay his child support. We live in a stupid small town with small town stupidity. His lawyer is a jerk, but in with the big dogs. And his dad works at the jail and Nick is a prison guard....so they get special treatmen. I mean his dad intercepted the divorce papers so nick wouldn't have to be served at his job.

Know those movies you see....about corrupt small towns.....I actually live in one of those.


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## DeniseK (Jun 25, 2009)

You say you are familiar with my area....do you know where I am from? It doesn't bother me...just curious. Yep....small town...smaller minds. But big problems....big big problems.


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## DeniseK (Jun 25, 2009)

Makes sence....I guess I thought you might be from somewhere close to here.....and I was suddenly feeling very sorry for you. lol.

It is a bad area. meth....std epidemic.....not a great dating pool. Our county was one of the highest rated for meth in the state not too long ago...they are trying to clean it up..but not much has changed. And the kids have nothing better to do than have sex.....and the adults arent any better....yikes...I gotta get out of this town.


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## DeniseK (Jun 25, 2009)

And the crap keeps getting weirder.

Kid at school tells my neice that her aunt is dating my son's stepdad. Neice politely tells her....'ex step dad".

Oh no...the girl explains...they been going out for a long time. He says I won't "let" him watch football. That was it? And I never stopped him from watching football. I didn't watch it much with him.....not that I don't love football...i do.. but he made me feel so stupid when we watched together...telling me I was wrong all the time. He demeaned me so I jsut gave it up.

Then she goes on to say " my uncle J is trying to get her(my) divorce over so aunt K can move in with Nick." omg....I am freaking out.


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## DeniseK (Jun 25, 2009)

ok...it's not that I care. I hope i don't sound like that. But omg...what is wrong with people? Do they have no morals at all. This woman has on visitation with her son. She gave it up....let her husband have custody. She wants to party and mess with my stbx. I am floored to be honest. Never ever would have thought he would do this. Who can you trust?


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## swedish (Mar 6, 2008)

Hi Denise,

The guy you married wouldn't but he's really seemed to go off the deep end since he took this job. Who knows why it started but I think you are right that the job has led to a lot of his strange behavior.

I guess J contacting the lawyer might make sense if he can't wait for her to move out but knows she cannot until she has a place to go...yuck what a mess.

I have been through the ringer with trying to get my ex to stay on scheduled visitation...gave up on the child support thing years ago...not the best move on my part but my only recourse was the courts and I know he would talk trash about me to the kids if I did that and I didn't want to put them through that...anyway, I did finally put my foot down with the visitation...found a place 1/2 way between our houses (empty parking lot) and we meet there the same time every time...consistency has helped.

If you aren't already, I'd start keeping a log (I did)...write down the date and what is said/done when wierd stuff happens. If he continues to display strange behavior at least you will have an audit trail....
9/1 refused to take kids for scheduled visitation
9/7 left kids on busy street and took off before my mom could safely get them in the car...

Sorry it's getting so bizarre for you.


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## DeniseK (Jun 25, 2009)

Thanks.....helps to have someone to listen.


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## Corpuswife (Apr 24, 2009)

I guess their morals are similiar...even parenting skills!

I bet you are glad that he's out of your hair!


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## DeniseK (Jun 25, 2009)

Oh yes....by far. I just wish I hadn't been such a fool. But the past is gone and now it's time to do what I have to do to protect my kids. Just can't get past the weirdness......and I thought that I couldn't find anyone weirder than my first hubby.....look, I went and found someone who is right in the same box....not a prize at all.


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