# Am I just crazy?



## lisamaree (Nov 2, 2014)

My husband and I have been together for almost 9 years, married for almost 5. Our relationship is generally very good but there is a constant issue that we've had for the past few years and that is SEX.

I'm 29, husband is 27. I want sex ALL THE TIME, all day everyday. My husband is content with sex once a week or every two weeks even. It's definitely slowed from a few years ago. I initiate almost every night and almost always get refused by him.

Worst of all there have been a couple of times I've caught him watching porn while I am asleep in bed, and he says it's because sex is too much work. 

We have two kids under 5 he likes to blame but I make sure they're asleep in their own beds by 9pm every single night, so now he likes to blame work instead. He's now too tired to have sex. Funny thing is I work 30 hours a week, go to university full time, be a wife and mom, and I'm still not too tired for sex.

I don't know what to do. We rehash this issue all the time, it turns into arguments all the time. We have a happy marriage otherwise, and I don't want to be with anyone else. But he makes me feel silly, crazy, or abnormal telling me that it's all me and I have a higher than average sex drive. He says once every 1-2 weeks is normal for a couple who's been together as long as we have with two young kids, but I have other friends with kids who say they get sex more often than I do. When I tell him this he laughs and says they are lying to make themselves look better than us.

I've told H that I know it's unrealistic for me to expect him to give it to me every day since his drive is low but can't he go twice a week then? I think I could compromise with that. Once a week if even is just way too little for me. 

I don't know what to do anymore. I've even threatened to leave him over this.... It's not all about how much I want sex but also how inconsiderate or careless he is about my feelings and desires in our relationship. Sometimes I feel that all that matters to him is if he's satisfied, he couldn't care less if I am or not. I cry myself to sleep next to him in bed sometimes and he rarely comforts me or tells me that he's sorry he can't keep up with me. Many times he just rolls over and ignores me, possibly from guilt.

I just needed to vent. I have no hope that there is anything I can do other than bear with this issue or leave.


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

That must feel horrible!

Couple of things I would suggest for you.

1. Check how affectionate you are and were and compare that to how affectionate he is and was. Has there been a shift at all? Have you become more touchy and has he become less so? If so, pull back because you're crowding him. Before sex happen, affection and touch happens. When conflict arises about sex frequency, the affection is no longer felt as affection but as a request for sex. 

2. Has he always had a significantly lower drive than you? If so, than your compromise might be the best you can hope to manage. If not, than he should get his testosterone levels checked. So get him to a doc any way you can. Testosterone directly affects sex drive in both men and women and since men are supposed to have much higher levels than women, this is usually the go to culprit to check when a man has a low sex drive.

3. Porn. Oh hell NO! He does not get to look at porn when he has a hot willing wife waiting for him! Make this the deal breaker that it absolutely should be! I have nothing against porn, but since he leaves you high and dry more often than not, you get first right of refusal!

4. People with lower sex drives feel intense pressure to feel something they don't, and can't manufacture themselves. This will likely be a life long issues that will get worse as time moves on. You need to ask yourself if you can live like this the rest of your life. Personally, I wouldn't recommend it to anyone, man or woman. But working on ways to compromise, to understand each other's needs, needs for sex and needs for space, you can come to a place where it's good enough.


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## poolboy (Sep 3, 2014)

i would suggest you check out his computer and see what type of porn he's into. maybe you're going about getting him turned on all wrong.


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## jorgegene (May 26, 2012)

wow. 

'every man's dream' 

a willing hot wife who wants it all the time!!

he's trying to use every excuse in the book and guess what?
they're all b.s.

I agree with the above. don't let him use porn to get off without you.


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

poolboy said:


> i would suggest you check out his computer and see what type of porn he's into. maybe you're going about getting him turned on all wrong.


I wholeheartedly disagree with the thought process that her husband may be watching porn because his wife doesn't turn him on in the right way. That is utter Bull sh!t. 

He is watching porn for two reasons. Could be both or just one.

1. He does have sexual urges but feels pressure from his wife so he has cut her off and seek easy release elsewhere. In other words, the fvcking cowards way out! I have ZERO respect for a man like this. Hate cowards with a passion!

2. He is watching porn in an effort to increase his arousal in order to meet his wife's needs. Unfortunately, watching porn for this reason may very well create a deeper chasm between them because his arousal is being trigger by passivity and is not being triggered by actively engaging with his wife. It is a cure that makes the disease worse.


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## Flying_Dutchman (Oct 29, 2014)

lisamaree said:


> I have no hope that there is anything I can do other than bear with this issue or leave.


^^^ Sad but true, with counselling as a third option.

My first LTR was HD. The word "No." wasn't in her vocabulary. I still had testosterone back then. Figured I'd won the Lottery.

More pertinently, it was pre-internet. I had a small collection of porn tapes. They accumulated dust and cobwebs for the duration of that relationship. I like sex more than I like watching other people have it so there was really no contest. If you have a willing and able partner, get in!

Who knows why he's watching it? Most likely an intimacy thing. If it were something 'kinky' I'd expect him to have made some effort to try it with you since HD women will typically try something different if it's not too 'out there'. Extreme S&M, gay, kids or animals covers the things he'd likely hide - but try not to go there without any proof. Intimacy issues top the list.

Be aware, his feeling inadequate to keep up with you can lead to a rapid downward spiral - low drive to no drive/ED.
There's no pressure to please Lil Miss Pornstar which unlocks his drive.

If that's where his head's at, you don't have to verbally or physically pressure him,, your very presence alone will remind him of his shortcomings.

If he's truly LD, even after successful counselling you may have to settle for once or twice a week. Could you?

My HD LTR - 7 days a week, more often than not. Some weekends I'd come close to begging for respite! Never less than 5.

2nd LTR (Average D) - 4 or 5 times a week before settling to a 3 - 4. Rarely less than 2 - 3.

So, NO, you aren't crazy. There are people who can keep up with you or, at least, keep you from going crazy.

If it were just the lack of sex I'd suggest the therapy but he can't even be arsed to cuddle you when you're crying. That sùcks. Sounds like a LOT of hard work just to bring him up to standard - where he'll still lack your drive.

Think on it - but not for too long.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

good evening lisamarie
People vary a lot in the amount of sex that they want, and High Desire, / Low Desire relationships are very difficult.

I don't have a problem with porn itself, but I DO have a problem with him watching porn when there is real person there who wants him.


Just to ask because you didn't describe it: Are you happy to do all the things he desires in bed? He says sex is too much work, but sometimes do you do the "work"? Do you play to his fantasies? Do you have to turn him down for specific acts that he wants but you do not? Often the high desire person needs to make a special effort to keep the low desire person interested.


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## lisamaree (Nov 2, 2014)

Anon Pink said:


> 1. Check how affectionate you are and were and compare that to how affectionate he is and was. Has there been a shift at all? Have you become more touchy and has he become less so? If so, pull back because you're crowding him. Before sex happen, affection and touch happens. When conflict arises about sex frequency, the affection is no longer felt as affection but as a request for sex.


My husband is not really affectionate at all. I haven't really seen a decrease or increase in it. I am very affectionate but I have always been that way. It's just who I am. My H will hug and kiss me and tell me that he loves me but I feel like I initiate all of that, too.



Anon Pink said:


> 2. Has he always had a significantly lower drive than you?


He has always had a lower drive than I do, but it's gotten much worse over the last few years. We used to have sex 2-3 times a week but now it's down to 1, if even. 



Anon Pink said:


> 3. Porn. Oh hell NO! He does not get to look at porn when he has a hot willing wife waiting for him! Make this the deal breaker that it absolutely should be! I have nothing against porn, but since he leaves you high and dry more often than not, you get first right of refusal!


How do I get him to stop? I've asked him to stop, he doesn't. He usually waits until I'm in bed, and then he will go into the den and watch it on the computer. I've even woken up and snuck out to catch him on it. He instantly turns it off but I know now he's just being more careful with it. When I tell him how it makes me feel he just says that porn is "easy" and he doesn't have to do anything, it also relaxes him before bed and he doesn't need to clean up afterwards.


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## lisamaree (Nov 2, 2014)

> i would suggest you check out his computer and see what type of porn he's into. maybe you're going about getting him turned on all wrong.


My husband is into what I would consider just very regular porn. The women aren't even more attractive than I am. He keeps his porn on an external hard drive that I have access to from my computer. I've even thought about deleting it but, I don't think that would do anything other than piss him off and start an argument that will get us nowhere.

As far as me not getting him turned on, without being too graphic, I give my H whatever he wants sexually. We have wonderful sex when we have it, he just has issues wanting it at all regardless of what I try to tempt him with.


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## lisamaree (Nov 2, 2014)

Thanks I think everyone here has given me good advice. I kind of knew that I would have to face whether to stay or not, it's not a decision I really want to make... I love him & want to be with him but you guys are right. And I don't know if I could stay in a relationship like this. His rejection of me is really hurting my self esteem. I can try backing off but I know that will just make the sex drop completely out of our relationship. I've even thought of being cruel and just denying sex to him so he knows how it feels... but unfortunately that would never work.

So I guess I have some thinking to do.


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## Mr.Fisty (Nov 4, 2014)

unfortunately, he has to lose something to change his behavior, or the threat of it.

Ask him if he can't meet your needs, ask for you to seek elsewhere, and last is divorce.

Your sexually not compatible anymore. 

Either you two meet in the middle, or it is pretty much done.


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## SlowlyGoingCrazy (Jun 2, 2011)

OP- My H is also mostly content to watch porn vs. having sex because it's easier too. 
I ended up in the same habit and we are now in a cycle I doubt can be broken. 

We've had different ideas over the years, cut off porn 100% and only focus on each other, do it together and with each other for a while, but nothing ever stuck. When one of us (and we've each been that one) isn't fully committed to fixing it we don't get anywhere for long. You really have to have both people really want to fix it to get anywhere IMO.


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## Mr.Fisty (Nov 4, 2014)

I know you love him, but there has to be more than love.

Your in a relationship where your needs aren't met. Maybe his is and he is content?

If so, your in a one-sided relationship, where one is content, and the other is not.


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

Yes you have some thinking to do. Porn is very attractive to an 'intimacy challenged' person. It is easier. He doesn't have to worry about anyone but himself. He doesn't have to face a real live person whose feelings he very much cares for and is terrified of not being enough.

I would suggest an ultimatum of some sort. "Get help for your porn addiction and intimacy avoidance or we split. I cannot live like this." And really, truthfully, you cannot live like that.

Lastly, I want to make something very clear to you, this has nothing what so ever to do with you, with how you look, with how sexy you are or aren't. This is 100% on him and his challenge to face. You can force him to face it, but he can't force you to live that kind of life either.

The choice is his, deal with it, or lose his wife.


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## BeenThereBefore (Nov 11, 2014)

why couldn't I have married someone like you, I have never turned down sex for any reason.
and I don't understand people who don't want sex, 
so I have no idea if this would work, 
but have you tired letting him watch porn while your having sex? 

if he says it's too much work, let him be on the bottom.


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## lisamaree (Nov 2, 2014)

I've tried to watch porn with him but porn really really bothers me. I don't really care if he watches it on his own but only if I'm satisfied. Whenever I've tried watching it with him I actually get turned off. It's a huge turn off for me to see him looking at another woman's body when I'm trying to be sexy. If it was the only way for me to get sex then I guess I would do it, but if my H has to watch porn to sleep with me I feel that's kind of weird.

I did not propose sex to him last night and today he came to the bed in the afternoon. I actually acted uninterested in him and he initiated today. So that's different. But I've reset my mental ticker to see how long til we do it again. I will try my hardest not to initiate and see what happens, it's very hard for me not to try to initiate. I've already had to fight an urge to grope him and tell him sexy things and it's only been a few hours!!


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## Flying_Dutchman (Oct 29, 2014)

lisamaree said:


> I did not propose sex to him last night and today he came to the bed in the afternoon. I actually acted uninterested in him and he initiated today. So that's different. But I've reset my mental ticker to see how long til we do it again. I will try my hardest not to initiate and see what happens, it's very hard for me not to try to initiate. I've already had to fight an urge to grope him and tell him sexy things and it's only been a few hours!!


Feigning disinterest might produce short term results if he fears you're going off him, but when you instantly respond cuz you're (secretly) gagging for it, it'll likely be back to the status quo before long.

That said, there's an outside chance that shifting initiation onto him will make you, and having sex with you, psychologically less intimidating for him and lead to improved mutual harmony. If you're still inclined towards 'trying', it's worth a try.

As I said before and as Anon P. said in more detail, there's little doubt that this is entirely about his own intimacy issues. He wasn't lying when he said porn was 'easy', but don't confuse that as a reference to physical effort and clean-up. It's emotionally 'easy' because he's under no pressure to please a pornstar and she won't make him feel inadequate.

It's very likely that your initiating intimidates him,,, he has a hot wife that he doesn't feel he can satisfy,, so he heads for the 'no pressure' girls.

In itself, if he were prepared to acknowledge it as his problem, it needn't be irreperable. But, factoring in not hugging you when you're upset, not hugging you at all unless you initiate that and settlng for 'easy' porn instead of moving heaven and earth to satisfy a willing and eager wife,, you also have to ask if this is an intimacy issue AND a selfish bàstard prepared to take his wife for granted.

It's YOU putting all the effort into improving things and he's either oblivious or uncaring. NEITHER are excusable.

Ongoing porn watching is fine for a HD hubby who doesn't want to bother a LD wife. It's also forgivable when people make short-term, misguided attempts to improve their drive, performance or interactions with their spouse. Genuine people swiftly acknowledge that porn isn't the key to their problem.

For your hubby, it IS a make-do key,,, cuz it's saving him from addressing his real problem - pleasing his suffering wife. If he cared that you were suffering, he would be looking elsewhere for a 'cure'.

So, I think you need to consider that this is a little bigger than just an intimacy issue. If it were just that, he might try porn, realise it's not working and seek therapy or self-help books. That he's oblivious or uncaring about your needs and has settled at fixing his own suggests he'll be resistant to change. While you put up, shut up and make changes that make his life easier, he'll stay just the way he is.


You're a tryer, Lisa, and that's an admirable thing,, but you need to find a line between trying and flogging a dead horse. The same line that seperates a worthy tryer from a fool. You don't have to settle (for where he's settled). You've tried to effect change. Now's the time to think about insisting on it. 

Give him an incentive,, if he doesn't grasp it that should tell you all you need to know.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Juicy Fruit (Nov 16, 2014)

Hi, everybody. I'm new, this is my first comment. I actually joined this site for this exact reason. I've been reading posts here for a few days, but I just joined yesterday. 

I've been questioning myself. I wonder if I've made myself too available. I never say no. They say that men like to "hunt", and if that's the case, then I'm like a sleeping deer at close range. lol He's spoiled, that I know. (I'm not tooting my own horn, just being realistic.)

At a guy's perspective, have I made myself too available? 

When I say I've never turned him down, I mean like not even once in all the years we've been together. (I've been with him since I was 19) Seriously, if he unzips. I'm down on my knees. lol Sometimes I wonder if I'm just pathetic. (TMI?) 
I realize, I've made our sex life all about him, so I take the blame for that, but it makes me happy to drive him wild, and in turn, it drives me wild. When we do have sex, it's great. And I know he's into it too. I just don't get why it's not more often. 
The marriage is great, we laugh a lot, have fun, share the same interests, we even like the same shows. He's the type that kind of takes things for granted. 

I know he loves me, that I know for sure. I just wonder if "hard to get" is such a good idea. I'm not a game player (unless someone plays games with me. Then it's "game on"!! lol) So, I don't want to play the hard to get game. But, I'm told men like the hunt. I guess I'm screwed, and not the good kind of screwed.


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

Juicy Fruit said:


> Hi, everybody. I'm new, this is my first comment. I actually joined this site for this exact reason. I've been reading posts here for a few days, but I just joined yesterday.
> 
> I've been questioning myself. I wonder if I've made myself too available. I never say no. They say that men like to "hunt", and if that's the case, then I'm like a sleeping deer at close range. lol He's spoiled, that I know. (I'm not tooting my own horn, just being realistic.)
> 
> ...



Welcome. Read this thread, I think it may answer some of your questions. It directly addresses your concern about being too easy for your husband.


http://talkaboutmarriage.com/mens-clubhouse/21278-thermostat-ultimate-barometer-your-r.html


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## Juicy Fruit (Nov 16, 2014)

Thank you, I will. Nice to meet you.


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## Flying_Dutchman (Oct 29, 2014)

'Thrill of the chase' is fun. Hunting something that's already wounded ain't my cuppa. I'd sooner patch it up and set it free.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Juicy Fruit (Nov 16, 2014)

LMAO, maybe "thrill of the chase" is a better term. Thanks for your enlightenment.


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## Flying_Dutchman (Oct 29, 2014)

Juicy Fruit said:


> LMAO, maybe "thrill of the chase" is a better term. Thanks for your enlightenment.


I'm sure he's happy to receive while you're happy to give, JF.

You don't suggest any other problems or even that this is one, since you're happy to do it.

Since he seems like a reasonable guy, could be he's oblivious to any idea of yours that things may've swung a lil too far in his favour.

Next time you're at it, break off and say "There are other things you could be doing with that.". , and chances are he'll be happy to confirm that you're right.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Juicy Fruit (Nov 16, 2014)

> Next time you're at it, break off and say "There are other things you could be doing with that.". , and chances are he'll be happy to confirm that you're right



Thank you.  Thankfully, that's not the problem. He's giving. I just have a higher drive, and he makes me feel like there's something wrong with that. I don't think there is. I feel like he takes it for granted, or that maybe it makes him feel emasculated? I know he feels he can't keep up with me. Maybe that bothers him as a man? I don't know. I'll ask him. I've never made him feel inadequate as far as I know, except for maybe the fact that I have a higher drive. I'm very open with telling him how great it (and he) is and I never say anything negative. The sex is great, just not as often as I'd like. 

When I try to talk about it, he gets mad at me. He hates talking about relationship stuff, and I don't like shoving things under the carpet. 

Another problem is, he's content and says he's happy, so he doesn't see a problem in the relationship. I try to just deal with it, but it bothers me. 

I think (another possibility) he may be too comfortable in the relationship. And to a point, that's a good thing, but it has it's downfalls too.

I've tried other things, like sexting, sending sexy pics or vids , calling him and saying things to rev him up. He's very responsive to that, but then he comes home and falls into the routine of life, gets tired, and falls asleep. 


He's a great guy, don't get me wrong. I just wish his drive was higher. He says it's just getting caught up in everyday life that makes it not happen as often as I would like it to. I'm having a hard time understanding that because I'm going through "everyday life" too, but yet, I still want to. 

Sorry for babbling, I was typing out loud.


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## Flying_Dutchman (Oct 29, 2014)

I understand that you don't want to make him feel bad. My suggestion was about the most tactful thing I could think of for you to say. It's just that, if you're giving non-reciprocals to an LD,, you might be halving your own 'hot action'.
It's a tough one, for sure.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Juicy Fruit (Nov 16, 2014)

> It's just that, if you're giving non-reciprocals to an LD,, you might be halving your own 'hot action'.



If you're saying what I think you're saying, I take care of myself there. lol But as they say, "Ain't nothing like the real thing, baby."  If you aren't saying what I think you were saying, then this is a very awkward moment. lol

Thank you for taking the time to read and respond. It's appreciated.


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

Juicy, I know you're new so you probably don't understand, I know I didn't when I first joined. It really is best to start your own thread that way people are responding to you and not splitting the responses between you and the OP. My very first post was practically a novel right smack in the middle of someone else's thread. You see people become invested in you and your issues and it's also easier for them to track your progress and respond. So read MEM's thermostats thread and then start your own thread back here in SIM.


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## Juicy Fruit (Nov 16, 2014)

Thank you. I apologize. The last thing I want to do is be rude. I thought maybe you'd see some similarities in what I was going through. Thanks again for telling me.


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## Flying_Dutchman (Oct 29, 2014)

Perhaps I misunderstood your original post. The unzips/knees part.

If you're doing that (or anything else) to completion,, and getting nothing yourself beyond the fulfillment of being a loving partner to an appreciative hubby,, it might take him 2 or 3 days to recharge,, meaning 4 - 6 days without for you if he's getting an 'in-betweener' for free.

If we're on different wavelengths, my apols, but at least it's funny-wrong.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

No need to apologize, though that was very considerate of you. 

I'll be on the lookout for your thread.


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## Flying_Dutchman (Oct 29, 2014)

Uggg. Mobile site goes straight to updates. Totally escaped me that JF didn't start thread.

Apols to OP.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Mr.Fisty (Nov 4, 2014)

Has he tried raising his dopamine production.

Dopamine is needed for libido, learning, motivation, energy, and cognition.

Zinc is one of the most important supplements that men need.

It will raise his testosterone and dopamine.

Working out, good sleep, a healthy protein diet, calorie limiting, sex, will raise dopamine levels.


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## Juicy Fruit (Nov 16, 2014)

> If you're doing that (or anything else) to completion,, and getting nothing yourself beyond the fulfillment of being a loving partner to an appreciative hubby,, it might take him 2 or 3 days to recharge,, meaning 4 - 6 days without for you if he's getting an 'in-betweener' for free.
> 
> If we're on different wavelengths, my apols, but at least it's funny-wrong


.


LOL 

That's a good point. Thank you. 




> No need to apologize, though that was very considerate of you.
> 
> I'll be on the lookout for your thread.




Thank you. It's just that when I read your post, it was like looking in a mirror, and you wrote it so well. LOL Maybe I should have copied it. LOL (Kidding) 

Seriously, thank you.  I would love to give you good advice, but as you can see, I have no idea what I'm doing. 



Edit....And to top it all off, I just posted under the wrong comment. LOL


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

You'll get the hang of it Juicy.


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## lisamaree (Nov 2, 2014)

Oh I'm very certain he has intimacy issues. His mother is not affectionate at all and his dad is pretty much absent from his life. I don't think he experienced affection. I, on the other hand, came from a very affectionate home so I am used to hugging and cuddling. I'd feel very content staying in bed and cuddling all day while I know my H would hate that. 

Today I just feel resentful. When I first met my H he was very physical. We had sex multiple times a day. This went on for a few years, then we lost it.

I haven't mentioned yet but my H had an EA a few years ago. I know it's ended and I blame it on him being very young (20) and I was his first real relationship. We also separated afterwards for some time (we weren't married). The OW was significantly less attractive than me. I've always thought he is intimidated by me. I think I'm attractive, affectionate, and obviously very into sex. Somehow I guess that makes him uncomfortable.

Last night I initiated. I just couldn't take it anymore. I was (and still am) angry. Of course I got denied.


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## Flying_Dutchman (Oct 29, 2014)

Little more to add, Lisa. I think 'intimidating' is at the heart of it.

That sets up a vicious circle whereby each instance of being a disappointment instills a greater fear of repeating the experience.

Youth and infatuation carry you through the honeymoon period. Thereafter, any feeling that he's punching above his weight, his drive is lower, his performance isn't good enough, can set the wheel in motion.

It ends up with what you have now. He's largely settled for being a non-participatory disappointment, rather than endure the terror of having his inadequacies proven to him.

His perception that he's inadequate leads to the reality. Without that negative view of himself you'd likely get back to something akin to the way it was. It's been so long though, that he has a lot of negative reinforcement to undo.

Of course, the majority of women (and men) want to be good looking,, but I wouldn't want to be reincarnated as a 'babe'. They have to fend off more suitors, deal with increased posessiveness and violence, and get less sisterly support from the 'competition'. Having navigated all that, they end up in relationships like yours, where good looks are a significant 'extra' among the other stuff that makes you intimidating.

The typical cheater mindset is to cheat 'up' - "grab it while you can" - so his EA with an 'uglier' woman (absent another obvious 'bonder') is telling.

At some ancient point the combination of your confidence and good looks became hard for him to compete with. The circle was set in motion until you became an intimidating threat to his ego. It's better for the male psyche to have a hot girl leave him for neglect than because he can't satisfy her in bed,, cuz if he can't perform with a hottie, what chance with an uglier one? Better to blank it out with wilful denial.

Therapy or no change, Lisa. Or, time to leave and hope you can pick the best wasp from the swarm around the jam jar.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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