# The Cold Shoulder...can't take it anymore



## alwaysnforever (Jun 16, 2011)

So there has been some distance between me and my husband. I will admit to my faults and can say that I am working on resolving my issues. I have my first counseling session tomorrow.

However, the cold shoulder I am receiving from my husband is driving me mad. I have insecurity issues and this only adds fuel to the fire. He has been chatting with a high school "female" friend on Facebook and I can't help but believe that this is the beginning of an EA.

I have tried to do small talk but his responses are short and to the point...yes...no...no further details or elaboration on the subject. 

I don't know what else to do. I've tried talking to him. Yesterday, I asked if we were okay and that just set him off. "I'm tired of you asking how our relationship is. It's fine. Work on yourself and maybe it will get better". 

Here's my analysis...he has found someone else to talk to and of course it's new and exciting and I'm sure their conversations are better than the fights we have been having. So my question is, is he trying to push me away or is he being honest when he tells me that there is nothing wrong and that he's just tired of me always wondering if he's happy.


----------



## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

He's got a grudge. I'm a grudge holder. I feel that its quicker to push her away than it is to be sucked into into her Dyson-of-Crazy to be pushed away by her later.


----------



## grizabella (May 8, 2011)

alwaysnforever said:


> So there has been some distance between me and my husband. I will admit to my faults and can say that I am working on resolving my issues. I have my first counseling session tomorrow.
> 
> However, the cold shoulder I am receiving from my husband is driving me mad. I have insecurity issues and this only adds fuel to the fire. He has been chatting with a high school "female" friend on Facebook and I can't help but believe that this is the beginning of an EA.
> 
> ...


 Have you ever heard of Occam's Razor? Sometimes the simplest answer is the best. If I were you I'd listen to his statement and work on the insecurities. If things don't get better after that, you have your answer.


----------



## alphaomega (Nov 7, 2010)

But the facebook issue can't be ignored. They either have to work on the marriage together or it won't work, regardless.

Do you know what's being discussed? Have you seen any of thier conversations?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## alwaysnforever (Jun 16, 2011)

alphaomega, I have only seen one and it appeared innocent enough.


----------



## jayde (Jun 17, 2011)

Always - you have your first counseling session today. Since he say things are 'fine' from his perspective, see if he has any ideas about what you could raise in your session (and guard your insecurity). Not to say he's 'right' about what you need to work on, but it might get him to say something - and might shed some light on what he's feeling. It's often easier to talk about others' issues rather than your own. And I assume he's not usually a man of so few words. Good luck with your session.


----------



## alwaysnforever (Jun 16, 2011)

Jayde, the counseling session today is just for me. My husband has not agreed to couples counseling at this point. He believes that my insecurities are the cause of our issues therefore he believes that I am the only one who needs the counseling.


----------



## shaung (Mar 18, 2011)

Did the cold shoulder start at the same time he began talking to his old HS friend? Just curious.


----------



## alwaysnforever (Jun 16, 2011)

shaung said:


> Did the cold shoulder start at the same time he began talking to his old HS friend? Just curious.


Hmmm...I don't know as I don't know when these conversations started. I just found the email last Wednesday. But good point.


----------

