# Don't know what to do!?!



## mrsannie (May 14, 2012)

I am so confused I don't know what to do. I am wanting out of my marriage. I am 25 years old with 3 little boys ages 5 , 2, and 6 weeks ( no this is not postpartum depression) I have not been happy for a very long time. We seem to be growing apart, but ht thinks everything is fine. I try to tell him that I am not happy and he just thinks I am playing. I feel so trapped I don't want to hurt him or the kids. He is a great daddy to our boys, and he is good to me he does everything he can to try to make me happy, but I just do not feel the same about him. I am not sure I am even in love with him anymore. I think that we got married to fast. We got married when I was 18 years old and we had only really own each other for about 4 months. People keep asking me why I kept having babies, and my answer is I am not sure. I was trying to have the happy family I wanted. I have tried so hard to fall in love with him but my heart is just not in it at all. We were surprised when we got pregnant with number 3. 

Everyone I talk to is so judgmental they call me names and tell me I treat my husband like ****, and I am doing him wrong. They tell me I should just stay because of the boys. I do not want to hurt my kids, but I don't think I should have to be the one in a relationship hurting. I feel like if I go I will be hurting everyone to make myself happy and I am just being selfish. 

We were going to try to separate. My husband is in the army so I was going to move back up towards my family and he was going to stay with a friend near work . Only about 45 mins apart. I am not sure if this is going to work or not. I really do not think anything can be worked out. I do not know how to change the way I feel. Any advice?!


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

What things have you tried to fix this?

What do you think he would need to do to turn things around?

How do you think that being divorced would help you? Do you have someone in mind who would make you happier?


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## UpnDown (May 4, 2012)

My honest advice to you is to seek individual counselling AND marriage counselling. Before you do anything that is your best step imho.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## justabovewater (Jun 26, 2011)

There seems to be alot that you are NOT sure about, so my advice to you would be to get yourself in some individual counselling to help you figure that out. It sounds like you got married and had a gaggle very quickly and didnt give your marriage a chance to grow first, which is neither here nor there. I just feel that before you break up your family that you need to do everything within your power to save it. Divorce is hell on all of those involved, so its best to know, without a doubt, that divorce is what you want. Maybe the two of you need to get back to who you were before babies and try to nuture and grow that part of your relationship. Hope this helps.


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