# H "married" OW in October and our divorce is not even final



## TeddieG (Sep 9, 2015)

I am sure most of you regulars are familiar with my story about my h, sbtxh, who has put me through the ringer with a host of physical and mental health challenges, which is why I those this subforum. 

After surgery in August, he reconnected with OW, whose family read him the riot act and so did she. She called me and said she felt bad but that he had asked her to marry him, but she wasn't going to if he was still stringing me along. She of course was just trying to make me angry and make me dump him. I didn't take the call but it went to voice mail. Basically he came home the next day from visiting her to announce he was moving out to a hotel, which lasted three days, when I got a call that he wanted a divorce. But while he was here that Sunday, he was trying to take a shower and take a nap (he hadn't told me he was definitely leaving), and she burned up his phone with constant texts and calls. At one point she was screaming into the phone, telling him she had "solved" his problem for him by calling me and why was he still here, and to get his azz back up there after he got his clothes. He sat here for hours googling mental health issues in women and drama like adolescents. Then he said I guess you talked to her, and I said no. He said, she called, and I said, well, I got a call from a number I didn't recognize so I didn't answer it. He said, she is going to try to call you and talk to you. I replied, I have no interest in talking to her, but how do you feel about it? He said don't talk to her, she lies. He was sitting right there when she called and left the message, so he knew what she said, and he THOUGHT I didn't know yet. But he left that afternoon saying he was getting a hotel, but he ended up living in her camper trailer at the Air Force base. And then she sold the camper trailer in about 24 hours so he was "forced" to move in with her. 

So then my mother died and he came home and went to the funeral with me, and OW started texting him the afternoon of the funeral and burial. He called her that evening and talked for over an hour and then announced he was going back to her stay and he wanted a divorce.

So our lawyers have been working out the particulars, although he wanted a fast ten-day online divorce, and i said no, I wanted a lawyer of my own to consult and review our financial situation. 

I went on the online court system to check and see where the filing was because his lawyer was slow. It was there, and the agreement was that his lawyer would forward a proposal to mine, and things could be finished by Halloween. His lawyer was again, slow, and nothing in the form of a proposal appeared until about ten days ago. 

But when i checked the status of the original filing, I noticed h and OW had filed for a marriage license. I was sure the court system would reject it because i was sure they would check to see the divorce was still in process. But I checked today to see if my lawyer's answer was filed (it was), but the marriage license was evidently issued, and h and OW returned it to the clerk's office and their "marriage" has been certified. He's still married to me, and bigamy in this state is a felony carrying a five-year prison sentence! 

I'm sure if anyone ever caught on to it, they'd just marry again after the divorce is final, but she is evidently in the dark that he was not divorced. He HAD to have been lying to her about it and told her he was divorced, and I have no idea what the hell he is thinking, other than trying to please her and the family, who ripped him a new one in August for disappearing from her life in June (when they had a physical altercation and he was arrested) and reappearing in her life and then disappearing again. He HAS to know he is not legally married to her, and he HAS to know, from talking with his lawyer, that he has to wait six months to marry someone else AFTER the divorce is final. 

I almost feel sorry for the OW but I must admit I take a delicious delight in the fact that she thinks she's married to him, but it's not legitimate. I knew he was one sick puppy, but this really takes the cake and is so over the top even for him that I shudder to think how he lives with himself.


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## happy as a clam (Jan 5, 2014)

Wow! Just plain weird. Any chance he will be prosecuted? If so, who would initiate the case? He certainly deserves it!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## TeddieG (Sep 9, 2015)

happy as a clam said:


> Wow! Just plain weird. Any chance he will be prosecuted? If so, who would initiate the case? He certainly deserves it!
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


In the proposal that we got were the basic things he had put in the paperwork for the online divorce - listing his debts, offering me a certain amount of money for twelve months. His list of debts wasn't even complete. He had wanted to come down here (they are 20 minutes up the road) and have me log on and put in my financial info, including social security #, and I said no (I had no idea who would be seeing the paperwork and how much OW might be involved, and he has had to put holds on or request new credit cards because he's paranoid they're being stolen when he's up there with her and her addict son). I told him to send me the paperwork. So he printed it off, scanned it, and emailed it to me, and I took a copy to my lawyer and provided her all the info the form required. She told me to tell him to take that form to HIS lawyer, who she knows well, have the lawyer file for the divorce and provide her the proposal and we would counter. His lawyer was so slow, and in our initial meeting, my lawyer had told me that the form wasn't adequate, so we had a plan for responding to the initial proposal before it ever arrived. There were things she wanted to ask for on my behalf (including that I remain the beneficiary on his life/AD&D policy for three years; she said their relationship is so volatile they probably won't last that long, but they've been so violent, I expect their relationship to end with the death of one of them and prison for the other). But he had used a separation date of 10/2007, and married in January of 2006 after 11 years together! Not only did I ask her to request the things she mentioned, I asked her to have them agree to a different separation date. He was at my mother's funeral when he announced fully and finally he wanted the divorce, and I wanted that as the date of separation. 

So when my lawyer is emailing his, after they agreed to everything EXCEPT the separation date, it was very interesting; his lawyer said, my client says the separation date is correct, what are you trying to hide? My my lawyer replied, saying, that's funny, I was just about to ask you the same thing. She also said in her email to his lawyer, this is important to my client, but she is fully aware that her sbtxh desires to marry his girlfriend before the holidays are over and she has no desire to stand in his way. Little do they all know, he already "married" her. I wonder if he'll want a do-over after the divorce is final. 

In the end h and his lawyer agreed, but now I know why it was a sticking point; he was already "married" to OW, and the day he bolted after we returned from Mom's funeral was just about a month from the date of his "marriage." Hmmm.

I think I'm going to mention it to my lawyer but I might also anonymously contact the court clerk's office, the one issuing and certifying the marriage license. I had told my lawyer that h was anxious to marry OW, and she said that basically the state doesn't care if two people cross the state line and marry before the six months is up, but evidently they did it here and no one checked and took his lying word for the divorce date. I wonder if he forged previous divorce filings. Even IF two people cross the state line to marry, if they cohabit in this state after a divorce before the six months is up, they're in violation of the law. My lawyer says the state doesn't really care; it is issues of bigamy, primarily related to child support, that they care about. 

But dang. I'm still married to the SOB and technically he's a felon, but more importantly to me, what the hell? He couldn't tell the love of his life that he flaked out on the divorce five years ago and still isn't really divorced? SMH. It occurred to me that he might have told her he wasn't divorced and that's why he was under so much pressure to get it done fast, but he and she applied for the marriage license ten days after he FILED. 

I looked up OW's third divorce, which she and her then-h (married less than a year) did online and it was final in about 3 weeks. So I'm thinking he told her he filed online, it would be done fast, and then when it wasn't, he didn't have the balls to tell her that I didn't agree to go online and make it so. OR he was lying and told her that the divorce was final ages ago when he was the one who decided he didn't want to go through with it. 

There are SO many elements to this that are just SO mind boggling. After the altercation they had in June, there were restraining orders issued that required them to stay apart. If they get in a fight, and the cops come to her house (again), and run their records, that could easily be found unless the orders have been lifted. 

But the interesting thing is, he told me once that he had never gotten involved with her with the intent of being financially responsible for her or her kid, he just wanted to fVck her. I truly believe that deep down inside he does NOT want to be married to her, but put himself in a position where the family called him out and he was seriously butt hurt. 

It will be interesting to see if he goes through with the filing of the final decree that we've agreed upon. My lawyer will be delivering it to his next week and this should all be over in a couple of weeks. But he has changed his mind about divorce before, and he's going to have the best of both worlds: divorced from me but not really truly legally married to her. It is all a sham, and either he thought he could pull the wool over everyone's eyes, including the legal system, or he is fully aware of what he's doing and playing a game. But he has had so much difficulty acting making the leap and leaving me, I will be really interested to see if he balks on the final decree. I don't have to appear, nor does my lawyer; he and his lawyer will show up and request the judge accept the negotiated decree, and I can't wait to see if he does. 

Un-fvcking-believable.

But it is also possible that both h and OW KNOW that they can't remarry until six months have passed and don't care. He could have rationalized that as far as he's concerned, he IS divorced and done with me, and then deceive OW to tell her the divorce was done. He must have been under immense pressure from her and the family. And while I realize he is completely divorced from reality, in this case, while I acknowledge the pressure he may have been under based on his promises and lies to the OW, don't read that as sympathy or empathy. This guy has avoided consequences for his behavior his whole life. I am just sure the cognitive dissonance in his head must be 1000 decibels, IF the real guy that I thought I knew is in there in any shape or form.


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## laroo (Feb 16, 2013)

Ditto on the, "wow!" He doesn't even really sound sure of himself. Sort of like he's just being pushed around by this crazy woman. Sad. My former spouse wasn't really happy with the girl he cheated on my with (he told one of our friends he just needed to get away from her) but he had gotten her pregnant and it was so sad watching her RULE him. He was kind to me when we were alone talking and as soon as she walked in the room he was putty.  I know this still has to suck for you. I'm just glad you are seeing some of the lunacy that is going on seemingly with a clear head. 

Are you doing okay with the physical and mental challenges?


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## TeddieG (Sep 9, 2015)

laroo said:


> Ditto on the, "wow!" He doesn't even really sound sure of himself. Sort of like he's just being pushed around by this crazy woman. Sad. My former spouse wasn't really happy with the girl he cheated on my with (he told one of our friends he just needed to get away from her) but he had gotten her pregnant and it was so sad watching her RULE him. He was kind to me when we were alone talking and as soon as she walked in the room he was putty.  I know this still has to suck for you. I'm just glad you are seeing some of the lunacy that is going on seemingly with a clear head.
> 
> Are you doing okay with the physical and mental challenges?


 @laroo, he is TOTALLY pushed around by this woman. All she has to do is crook her finger in a "come hither" move and he's all over it. He used to say his first wife was vain and controlling, and I was just the opposite (okay, I DID take care of myself but I was NEVER controlling). H's niece had a long split with her h and we debated the ways that some people need the structure of a family only to start to resent it and think of it as controlling. This wh*re rules the roost. And he's miserable most of the time he's with her. 

I am doing SO okay now that he's gone. After he had his heart attack in April and made it to the ER in time, and got good medical care, had tons of scans, found the aneurysm, scheduled surgery, I thought he was on the upswing. But he woke up on the ventilator, thinking he was dying (and our nurse DIL says this is common and happens a lot), but took 8 hours to wake up from anesthesia because his blood pressure dropped so low, he was really depressed. He spent HOURS watching videos of teaching tapes about the aneurysm stent, and he just got more and more depressed. Then my mother died, and he needed the fix of the OW again. 

He was manageable until the surgery, and then it all went to shyte. But wow, I thought the divorce would be done in a couple of weeks, he'd marry her, settle down, be happy, but he just gets crazier and crazier. I really think their relationship is going to end in a drunken murder-suicide or one of them will kill the other and go to prison (although they both seem to escape consequences all the time; the PD where they live has a rap sheet on her a mile long, and her son is in prison awaiting trial for shooting his drug dealer). 

I told him, the night of my mother's funeral, after he spent an hour on the phone with OW, and then told me as we were going to bed that when we got back he was going back to her and staying and wanted divorce, that he was just determined, I guess, to commit suicide by who*re. I had tried everything I knew to get him to see the danger, and he himself admitted that it is dangerous, but after his surgery when he said he couldn't understand why he was so fVcked up that he would be drawn to her again, I said, maybe you could look into depression and your need for her drama to feel alive again. But he didn't want an answer; he wanted pity and permission. 

It makes me very very sad that his mental and physical health issues have come to this, but I am so relieved it is not happening in my space. That's awful, I know, but HE made his choices.


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## laroo (Feb 16, 2013)

I am so glad you are out of this. Phew! So sorry he is having all of the medical issues and glad he's been treated though. Also very sorry to hear about your mother. 

Sounds like he and the ow are a sinking ship and again so glad you can wash your hands of it. I don't understand how a woman can rule a man like that. Especially when the man knows better! Like you said...he was so glad you weren't controlling but look where he still ended up. 

Sheesh!


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## TeddieG (Sep 9, 2015)

Exactly. Just when I thought it couldn't be MORE insane. It's almost comical, if it weren't so tragic. I have a set of porcelain masks on my wall, the comedy and tragedy set, a lapel pin, and a charm on a bracelet as well. Funny, I know exactly who I'll think of when I look at them now.

I don't attribute anything he's done to malice, but to mental health. And yet I have to ask if it has worsened as he has become more duplicitous. In reality, his entire life of never having to live the consequences of being a con man ever caught up with him, and now they are. It's very sad, but he had choices.


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## laroo (Feb 16, 2013)

Haha, that is fitting, the comedy and tragedy. 



TeddieG said:


> In reality, his entire life of never having to live the consequences of being a con man ever caught up with him, and now they are. It's very sad, but he had choices.


And, yes, they get what they deserve.


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## TeddieG (Sep 9, 2015)

Emotionally and mentally, she's 12 years old. He's 58 going on 16, Mr. Peter Pan (I think of him every time I see that Geico commercial). They're both reliving their adolescence. And I'm real happy for them.


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## Ynot (Aug 26, 2014)

Just be glad to be out of the storm. Now put your plan into action and move forward!


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## TeddieG (Sep 9, 2015)

Ynot said:


> Just be glad to be out of the storm. Now put your plan into action and move forward!


You got it, @Ynot!


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## honcho (Oct 5, 2013)

Clerk of courts never checks if people are already married etc. They just want to collect the fee for the license. 

I do find it interesting that once paradise blows up for the soulmates since no legal marriage ever occurred there would be no divorce so she would be entitled to nothing. Sure your stbx thought about that when the had the wedding knowing somewhere in that brain of his this won't last.


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## SunnyT (Jun 22, 2011)

The court doesn't have to check and see if you are married elsewhere. When you apply for the marriage license you swear that you aren't currently married.


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## happy as a clam (Jan 5, 2014)

honcho said:


> I do find it interesting that once paradise blows up for the soulmates since no legal marriage ever occurred there would be no divorce so she would be entitled to nothing.


Yep! And then OW will sue him for fraud and press charges, and he'll become a convicted felon.


_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## tech-novelist (May 15, 2014)

happy as a clam said:


> Yep! And then OW will sue him for fraud and press charges, and he'll become a convicted felon.


I'll take the other side of that bet for a (virtual) 10-spot. Are you on?


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## tech-novelist (May 15, 2014)

I must say this is one of the top cases of mental disturbance I've read here, which is saying quite a lot.

You are the luckiest woman in the world to be rid of him!


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## farsidejunky (Mar 19, 2014)

Their relationship sounds so...healthy.

It will definitely withstand the test of time! Or, maybe just a few months...

Has he always been the soft spined?

Sent from my SM-N910V using Tapatalk


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## TeddieG (Sep 9, 2015)

honcho said:


> Clerk of courts never checks if people are already married etc. They just want to collect the fee for the license.
> 
> *I do find it interesting that once paradise blows up for the soulmates since no legal marriage ever occurred there would be no divorce so she would be entitled to nothing. Sure your stbx thought about that when the had the wedding knowing somewhere in that brain of his this won't last.*


That's what friends are telling me as well. I know he wanted to please her and her family, but he doesn't care if it is legal or not; it is all about appearances. It is an easy out for him. And shortly after he confessed about the infidelity, he always said he never intended to marry her or support her or the kid financially.


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## TeddieG (Sep 9, 2015)

farsidejunky said:


> Their relationship sounds so...healthy.
> 
> It will definitely withstand the test of time! Or, maybe just a few months...
> 
> ...


No, he hasn't. 7 years ago he had kidney stones and a doctor put a stent in his penis to keep the quarter-sized stone from passing. The doctor was inept, both putting it in and taking it out. H has never been the same since. 

I don't see them lasting, but I don't see him EVER telling her their marriage is not legal. She would go ballistic and shoot him. She is very very controlling and manipulative, so he gave her what she wanted, or gave her the appearance she got what she wanted.

As I've said many times here, he was a wonderful great and stand-up guy once. Something broke in him, and the real guy is still in there trying to get out, OR my h is really this weirdo and the real guy act was just that. I just don't know. But I've glad to have some distance on it and be more removed from it. I think the real guy, who was sandwiched between bi polar mania and bi polar depression, was the one who used to show up here in the last 7 years, and the other guy is perfectly suited for her.


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## TeddieG (Sep 9, 2015)

technovelist said:


> I must say this is one of the top cases of mental disturbance I've read here, which is saying quite a lot.
> 
> You are the luckiest woman in the world to be rid of him!


LOL, tech, I DID kind of wonder if this was one for the record books.


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## TeddieG (Sep 9, 2015)

@technovelist, I think it could go either way. If he's as mentally challenged as I think he is, I think he'll stay with her and enjoy his victim status. He likes being a victim. His addict son is a CLONE of him. The kid loses a job because he shows up late, or gets in fights with other employees, or shows up high, and then it is never HIS fault. He's always the victim. 

BUT she IS lawsuit happy. When h started dating her, she was in the middle of a lawsuit against an auto parts store where she'd been a cashier. She was part of a group of women who filed sexual harassment lawsuits against a manager, and they all settled but her; she wanted more money and got it but not before her lawyer fired her. She had sued a few other employers as well. She makes her money suing people. And then when she got the payout from the lawsuit, h was upset about how she spent the money. She squandered it. When h met her, they were working as delivery drivers at an auto parts store, delivering primarily to the Air Force Based. 


@Happyasaclam, the interesting thing about fraud that a friend of mine brought up is, one of the ways the OW and her mother were putting pressure on h was when OW had to have surgery. She had no insurance. She had a break-down at work the very week h was with me during my gall-bladder surgery (of course). Mama lectured him about how, if they were married, since he is a veteran, OW would have health insurance. But the crazy thing is, a charity gave her money to pay for that surgery, and the physicians still had to sue her to pay it, and then her wages were garnished, so she quit her job and is now self-employed as a CNA. H had her business cards printed up. She still gets her food stamps and free child care from the state, but this would stop if anyone at DHS ever realized she someone living with her. 

And now they're married she's going to insist that he put her on Tricare. I won't be surprised if he goes to the base to get her an ID card if he hasn't already. My ID still worked 3 weeks ago and I don't know if he canceled my ID without proof of divorce so this will be interesting. When it was time to renew mine last year, we went in together, so I don't know if the USAF will be checking, but I doubt it. So she wants to keep the benefits the state provides and also have the benefits of being married. But if she's on Tricare and they're not legally married, we're talking serious fraud. But I'm sure they'll never get caught. 

She got pregnant with the son she now has, who is 10 or 11, just about the time her child support from her two oldest was due to expire. The baby daddy didn't marry her, and has reduced the child support a few times. It is just enough to make her house payment, and she doesn't like to work. When h quit the job where they worked together, after she was fired for not wanting to work 15 minutes to a half-hour beyond her shift (even though the woman providing her child care lived two houses down and she worked five minutes from her house), somehow we were talking and she said that "how dare he quit? Someone's got to support us!" And I just laughed because I knew he knew exactly what he was doing. 

I knew the day he announced he'd been unfaithful that we were done, but this has been a really interesting study in mental challenges.


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Eh, who cares now, right? You're free of this soap opera and can now have a great life, with some great lessons learned tucked away.

As far as his stuff goes, IMO, most of this really DOES come from FOO, with a little dose of personality involved.


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## Mr.Fisty (Nov 4, 2014)

My ex-fiance cheated on me with her abusive ex.

I let her go without a fight, which made her angry as well.

Anyways, she was getting abusive towards me, and well,, it is not my job to protect her or make her well. She has to own that herself. My responsibility is towards myself first and foremost.

Watch him try using others and you as a crutch. Dysfunctional people are like black holes, where energy and focus is just sucked into them with nothing to show. They believe that sometimes the outside world can save them, that is why they look for external solutions more often than not.

Also, the attention feels good. Like people who suffered neglect as children, they seek a lot of validation and will gravitate towards those who give it.


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## TeddieG (Sep 9, 2015)

turnera said:


> Eh, who cares now, right? You're free of this soap opera and can now have a great life, with some great lessons learned tucked away.
> 
> As far as his stuff goes, IMO, most of this really DOES come from FOO, with a little dose of personality involved.


Oh, yeah, definitely FOO. And definitely free of the soap opera and happy about it!! SO relieved. He DID put on a good act, I guess, and I am sure he is probably relieved to be free to be his thuggy gangster self with his abusive drunk girlfriend. Wow.

ETA: I guess the thing is, I could see him cheating on me, after I looked back at everything, and his fear of aging and mortality and the loss of ability to have sex. There was a time when I never feared he would do such a thing. But this, this testing the legal limits of appropriate behavior in something so serious, the level of deception he has practiced in this with the OW and her family; it just seems so out of character for the guy I knew and either he just doesn't give a shyte and has descended into total rebellion, or he has descended into total bipolar NPD madness. Either way, it is sad to see. But clearly my efforts of the last 7 years, believing that he would see his way to wellness and wholeness in time, to support him in that endeavor, were wasted. I guess he will have to hit rock bottom, if he ever does, to find his way back up.


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## TeddieG (Sep 9, 2015)

Mr.Fisty said:


> My ex-fiance cheated on me with her abusive ex.
> 
> I let her go without a fight, which made her angry as well.
> 
> ...


All of this is so true, Mr. Fisty. Fabulous observations. I thought I could support him while he got well, but he never had any intention to do so; he just wanted to feel sorry for himself and wanted the external excitement. And for 7 years he's used me like a crutch and would do it again in a heartbeat. He has sucked enough energy from my life and I don't have any more to give him. 

It's just all very sad, because his life didn't have to look like this. But quite honestly, I'm grateful to be free of dealing with his mother. She's so weird; if I comment that the Air Force enabled his behavior because he and his first wife moved every two years and they left their lovers behind, and the military ended the cheating relationships for them, she'll whine that the military was good for their other kids and he's just a weirdo. But the next thing you know, she's asking me if I think the military had anything to do with screwing him up. She doesn't listen to people without being defensive and pushing back, and then later she asks something based in a previous conversation, as though SHE thought of it, and it works for her because it is a source of blame and responsibility other than herself. 

So yeah. I read somewhere long ago that if someone is uncomfortable in a situation, unless they hate it enough to change it or do something about it, they'll just stay. I don't see my h leaving that situation up there other than in a coffin or a police car. 

But oh well.


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## honcho (Oct 5, 2013)

TeddieG said:


> @technovelist, I think it could go either way. If he's as mentally challenged as I think he is, I think he'll stay with her and enjoy his victim status. He likes being a victim. His addict son is a CLONE of him. The kid loses a job because he shows up late, or gets in fights with other employees, or shows up high, and then it is never HIS fault. He's always the victim.
> 
> BUT she IS lawsuit happy. When h started dating her, she was in the middle of a lawsuit against an auto parts store where she'd been a cashier. She was part of a group of women who filed sexual harassment lawsuits against a manager, and they all settled but her; she wanted more money and got it but not before her lawyer fired her. She had sued a few other employers as well. She makes her money suing people. And then when she got the payout from the lawsuit, h was upset about how she spent the money. She squandered it. When h met her, they were working as delivery drivers at an auto parts store, delivering primarily to the Air Force Based.
> 
> ...


While in the world of divorce no one seems to care about what laws are being broken, let's face it the system is a joke, the state does typically take a dim view on welfare fraud and usually chase that pretty hard. 

You would think your attorney with this info could "persuade " your stbx attorney why getting this all done rapidly would be in everyone's best interests before the house of cards falls apart.


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## TeddieG (Sep 9, 2015)

honcho said:


> While in the world of divorce no one seems to care about what laws are being broken, let's face it the system is a joke, the state does typically take a dim view on welfare fraud and usually chase that pretty hard.
> 
> You would think your attorney with this info could "persuade " your stbx attorney why getting this all done rapidly would be in everyone's best interests before the house of cards falls apart.


Exactly. I don't think h's attorney knows what a scum bag he's dealing with, although when I insisted they change the separation date, the lawyer replied to mine, what are you trying to hide? H has had moments of paranoid behavior, many of them, throughout the last 7 years, and our doctor even prescribed meds for that and his depression. H quit taking them within six months. He doesn't want to be well. I do plan to pass all this along to my attorney, but I expect her response will be, oh well. With all the meth and the drugs and the violence we have in this state, who people are sleeping or pretending to be married to really isn't a top priority of law enforcement. That said, I did do a quick Google search of bigamy charges in our state and someone was arrested in January of this year. The guy was married to a woman and had a fling on the side that he "married," and the first wife found out about it and busted his azz. The newspaper report specifically said it was the first time in many years that anyone has taken such a charge seriously, and in the comments, people made fun of the first wife calling her jealous and immature. 

Until someone's lived it, I guess, it just seems to be one of those things. 

H and his lawyer finally caved, and I got the final decree in my email last week, while away at a conference. I signed it when I got back on Wednesday and dropped it off at my lawyer's office. H and his lawyer will file it and the divorce should be done in two-three weeks, just in time for Christmas. And my lawyer has been pushing to get this done fast. She met h five years ago when we met in her office to come up with a final agreement and decree then, which we did. All he had to do was take it to the court and appear before the judge and present it, but instead he came home that evening and said he didn't want to go through with it. My lawyer advised me to anyway, because she said when people flip-flop, they end up filing again. She wasn't amused that the day we buried my mother, h was breaking his finger responding to OW's texts and then leaving me on the back porch of my brother's house to go call her. H was really good during the funeral, sweet, and supportive; he and my Mom had a good relationship, she loved him dearly, and she forgave him for his cheating. But that afternoon, while everyone was relaxing and unwinding, he was wound up, and I found out later that it was because OW had texted some random thing, probably drunk. He DID try to resist and was angry she'd reached out, but I asked him why he had unblocked her number. He doesn't do mortality well, and needed his fix, I guess. 

My lawyer's awesome, so I can't wait to hear what she says when I tell her all this.


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## tech-novelist (May 15, 2014)

I think you should try to sell this story to a TV network.

Probably Lifetime. >


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## TeddieG (Sep 9, 2015)

technovelist said:


> I think you should try to sell this story to a TV network.
> 
> Probably Lifetime. >


I'm thinking of calling the Who the Bleep Did I Marry 800 number! LOL!


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