# nor the right time to have Kids !!



## uglykidant (Mar 2, 2010)

We got married last year and have difficult time initially as she lost her job for a while and then we decided for her to go back to school. That desicion put too much stress in our relationship as I agreed to pay all by myself rather than taking loan but she agreed to pay it back,once she will get a job.

Anyways after managing this awkward situation for few months, she now suddenly start talking about raising a family and having kids.
Initially we agreed to have kids after two years but now situation has changed , she is studying for a year and economy is weak. I am not sure if she can get a good job later or not. I don't want to bear the financial burden of raising a child totally on myself. 

I am not sure how to discuss these matters with her without bring her to emotional crying.If I talked too openly then she feel like I am too money minded and if I don't ,I feel like I am wasting my hard earned money on something which I don't feel good about.

I know its awkward but I really need help about how to discuss this matter with my wife.

Thanks,
uglykidant.


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## IamWoman (Mar 31, 2010)

Best advice I can give you is to just listen to her for a while. This could be just a phase she is going through. If you don't give any input you may hear some doubts she has and she might talk herself out of it. If she starts getting really serious about it sit down together and weigh the pros and cons on paper. A lot of women can see reality a little clearer if it is black and white. In the cons (and/or pros) you can put your feelings. I'm sure if money were not an issue you could help in the pros. If you approach her in a way that at least appears that you are humoring her, she will be more receptive to how this whole thing makes you feel. Then again, she could change her mind tomorrow.


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