# Is there something wrong with me?



## Married4life123 (Apr 14, 2019)

My wife and I have been married for 20+ years, we’ve had our ups and downs but recently our sex life has been OK. Problem is, Most of the time it’s more of a roll over in the morning and screw kind of thing. Well there’s really nothing wrong with that, but it’s been quite a few years since I’ve really felt that she wants me in anyway. I think she really just does it to appease me. I’ve talked about this with her several times in the last year or two and she just doesn’t really have much of a desire but just kind of goes along with it. She was forced into menopause and early age due to a hysterectomy so now her desire is almost nonexistent. She feels bad about it but will absolutely not do any type of hormone therapy to try and bring some of that back. 

Problem is, as time goes by her libido gets less and less but mine seems to just keep getting worse and worse. I’m more horny now on a daily basis than I think I have ever been in my life and I’m 47 years old. I’m starting to think that there’s something wrong with me, it may be some sort of hormonal imbalance on my part. I have an insatiable desire and it’s driving me ****ing crazy. I’m doing everything I can not to make her feel bad. I masturbate at least once or twice a day and it just doesn’t do enough. Is it such a thing where a man has too much of a sexual appetite?


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## Violet28 (Oct 4, 2018)

The only way you'll find out if it's something physical is by going to the doctor for a checkup. Is possible there is more of a mental / emotional factor to this though? Kind of like forbidden fruit. The more you tell yourself you shouldn't want something, the more you agonize and obsess over it sort of thing.


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

You are at that place in life where opposites collide.
You did not seek out this place, it found you, and not by perchance.
You are not physically alone, with this alone-in-your-thought face, you set still here, and reside.


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## Married4life123 (Apr 14, 2019)

I have a hard time talking with anyone, even doctor in person about this. What can they relly do...?? “Doc, Im
So ****ing horny I can **** a goat”..what can they actually sayor do to help?


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## Married4life123 (Apr 14, 2019)

SunCMars said:


> You are at that place in life where opposites collide.
> You did not seek out this place, it found you, and not by perchance.
> You are not physically alone, with this alone-in-your-thought face, you set still here, and reside.


I have no frigin clue what you are saying... 


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## Livvie (Jan 20, 2014)

Married4life123 said:


> I have no frigin clue what you are saying...
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


Haaaaaa


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## Livvie (Jan 20, 2014)

You're probably feeling the way you are because you haven't had intimate, mutual, caring sex in a long time.

I suggest marriage counseling or a sex therapist for you two. At 47 you are very young and facing a life of unfulfillment if this doesn't change.


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## Violet28 (Oct 4, 2018)

They can test your hormone levels and see if something's wrong. Endoncrinology can be super complex, who knows may be you have too much dopamine or an issue with neurotransmitters. Don't know unless you ask!


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## ABHale (Jan 3, 2016)

Married4life123 said:


> I have no frigin clue what you are saying...
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


Welcome to the club.


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## Mr.Married (Feb 21, 2018)

Married4life123 said:


> . What can they relly do...?? “Doc, Im
> So **ing horny I can ** a goat”..what can they actually sayor do to help?


Visit a farm ?


While I don’t have those issues with my wife I do have times where my drive is more than I would like it to be. I haven’t found a good way to get the edge off. The only advice I have is get a Fleshlight or Tenga Flip.


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

Married4life123 said:


> My wife and I have been married for 20+ years, we’ve had our ups and downs but recently our sex life has been OK. Problem is, Most of the time it’s more of a roll over in the morning and screw kind of thing. Well there’s really nothing wrong with that, but it’s been quite a few years since I’ve really felt that she wants me in anyway. I think she really just does it to appease me. I’ve talked about this with her several times in the last year or two and she just doesn’t really have much of a desire but just kind of goes along with it. She was forced into menopause and early age due to a hysterectomy so now her desire is almost nonexistent. She feels bad about it but will absolutely not do any type of hormone therapy to try and bring some of that back.
> 
> Problem is, as time goes by her libido gets less and less but mine seems to just keep getting worse and worse. I’m more horny now on a daily basis than I think I have ever been in my life and I’m 47 years old. I’m starting to think that there’s something wrong with me, it may be some sort of hormonal imbalance on my part. I have an insatiable desire and it’s driving me ****ing crazy. I’m doing everything I can not to make her feel bad. I masturbate at least once or twice a day and it just doesn’t do enough. Is it such a thing where a man has too much of a sexual appetite?
> 
> ...


If she is not willing to do HRT then that basically shows she does not care about being emotionally connected to you or your emotions. I cant understand why a spouse would rather be disconnected from a husband emotionally than to fix her condition. My wife had a hysterectomy at 43. She has been taking HRT for past 8 yrs. She says "I can not understand why women do not use HRT and be normal, it really screws you up to not have your hormones right." 

Its not an imbalance, when you have asthma....air becomes very important. Same with intamacy with your wife, when it is not there....


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## manwithnoname (Feb 3, 2017)

Married4life123 said:


> I have a hard time talking with anyone, even doctor in person about this. What can they relly do...?? “Doc, Im
> So **ing horny I can ** a goat”..what can they actually sayor do to help?


Your doctor may also be a goat farmer


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## AVR1962 (May 30, 2012)

The stages can happen to both men and women. I, as a woman, would lay awake at night unable to think because of my desires when married. I had all kinds of crazy dreams. Of my lady friends it seems those who hit menopause go in extremes, either no desire are more desire than ever.

Without hormone therapy the likelihood that she will rebound is really not favorable. The more she does not have sex the more it will hurt for her also. Just like men, if women snooze they lose it too. 

What is her fear about hormone therapy? There are great hormone specialists and they can help her turn this around. The dangers mostly lie with women who are overweight, who smoke, or those who have a family history of blood clots or reproductive organ cancer.


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## frusdil (Sep 5, 2013)

Divinely Favored said:


> If she is not willing to do HRT then that basically shows she does not care about being emotionally connected to you or your emotions. I cant understand why a spouse would rather be disconnected from a husband emotionally than to fix her condition.


That is absolutely not true.

Hormone therapy isn't for everyone, many people react badly to it. Many others react well. Others go on to develop different forms of cancer. It's not as simple as just "take hormone therapy".


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## Mr.Married (Feb 21, 2018)

frusdil said:


> That is absolutely not true.
> 
> Hormone therapy isn't for everyone, many people react badly to it. Many others react well. Others go on to develop different forms of cancer. It's not as simple as just "take hormone therapy".


We have no history of trying HRT but I’m wondering if you tried it out and what was the outcome?


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## frusdil (Sep 5, 2013)

Mr.Married said:


> We have no history of trying HRT but I’m wondering if you tried it out and what was the outcome?


No, I haven't and I'm not sure I ever would. I had an endometrial ablation a year ago, and my specialist wanted me to have the Mirena put in at the same time. Initially I agreed, but after researching it changed my mind. Purely due to the cancer risk.

That said, I wouldn't just expect my husband to go without sex either. I know some people won't do that, and it's all about them, but I believe that when you're married, you both have to consider the other person and neither spouse has the right to just put the kabosh on sex.


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## Mr.Married (Feb 21, 2018)

frusdil said:


> No, I haven't and I'm not sure I ever would. I had an endometrial ablation a year ago, and my specialist wanted me to have the Mirena put in at the same time. Initially I agreed, but after researching it changed my mind. Purely due to the cancer risk.
> 
> That said, I wouldn't just expect my husband to go without sex either. I know some people won't do that, and it's all about them, but I believe that when you're married, you both have to consider the other person and neither spouse has the right to just put the kabosh on sex.


My wife had an ablation as well. Best thing ever...


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## AVR1962 (May 30, 2012)

frusdil said:


> That is absolutely not true.
> 
> Hormone therapy isn't for everyone, many people react badly to it. Many others react well. Others go on to develop different forms of cancer. It's not as simple as just "take hormone therapy".


You are correct, it is not for everyone and a specialist can go through your history and figure out whether it would be an option. For those who qualify it is a good option.


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

frusdil said:


> That is absolutely not true.
> 
> Hormone therapy isn't for everyone, many people react badly to it. Many others react well. Others go on to develop different forms of cancer. It's not as simple as just "take hormone therapy".


All the breast cancer back in the day came from women taking synthetic hormones. It must be bio-identical. 
If tgey were having problems then they would be having problems before the went into menopaus when they had their hormones.


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

AVR1962 said:


> You are correct, it is not for everyone and a specialist can go through your history and figure out whether it would be an option. For those who qualify it is a good option.


The Dr that put my wife on HRT after her hystorectomy was the Chief Oncologist of the Women's Cancer Center at Baylor Hospital in Dallas.

She said the hormones need to be bio-identical not the syntthetic drugs. She put wife on compuonded testosterone cream and progesterone cream and estradial. She said alot of obgyns say after hysterectomy or menopause that a woman does not need progesterone that is mainly responsible for the cycle. She calls BS and said there is more that it does besides cycle. She said all you do with HRT is replace what your body no longer produces itself, it is supposed to be there in a healthy functioning body.


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

AVR1962 said:


> You are correct, it is not for everyone and a specialist can go through your history and figure out whether it would be an option. For those who qualify it is a good option.


Problem is too many women rely on their ob/gyns who dont know squat about hrt....my wifes ob/gyn said she did not need anything. He was overrulled by Chief Oncologist who statedcalot of obgyns dont know and are scared to prescribe hrt.


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

I have seen how lack of hrt can totally screw a woman up! After my wifes hystorectomy her mind would not work right.

She was coming to my office one day, town of 25k where she grew up. Less that 10 min drive. She calls after 45 min and is at the courthouse downtown and does not know how to get to my office. I went to her and when she looked at me she had no idea who i was for about 30 sec. She said it was like her brain was in slow motion.

I have a co-supervisor that is basically a laughing stock. She had hystorectomy years ago and at times her speach is slurred and she can sit in front of a computer and not be able to type and work on a document. Her head is so screwed up and i have told her several times she needs hrt but she said no she is fine. She has zoned out on way home and hit a tree and totaled her vehicle. 

Luckily an off duty para.edic was first on scene. She did not know who she was until she came to in ambulance. 

Same at office she went out and was found laying in the floor in her office. She was incoherent and combattive until she came to in ambulance pulling i to er.

So she will continue being the butt of jokes because she "dont need hrt, im fine".... No she is not. Her head is screwed up because her hormones are off. I do not think she even realizes how screwed up she acts. Sad really she is in denial.


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