# Time to sample my own medicine



## MEM2020 (Aug 23, 2009)

So after all this philisophical debate about whether or not "it" can be good for your partner even if they don't reach the finish line, I am going to do an experiment. 

As for background:
- Her condition continues to cause her pain "down there"
- Maybe 1/5 of our encounters include her letting me do other stuff to get her to the rapture
- Hundred percent of our encounters end in her - well you know - since we can't have intercourse. So I ummm always finish. 
- Last weekend (I travel most weeks for work) we had a brief but humorous exchange about "my" ideal frequency. Normally we connect 2 of the 3 nights a week I am home. Sometimes all 3, sometimes once. Average twice. We had a "if I stopped travelling" talk about frequency. She asked if I would want daily. I bantered that every other day would be perfect and added - so 3.5 times a week - but with sex you always round up - so 4 times a week. 

Then it dawned on me how our conversation mirrored the physical reality of the bedroom. It was solely about what "I" wanted. So last night after we connected, I lightly attempted to extract her answer to the same question. Started off by telling her one of the things I always loved about her was that she was always so honest with me. Added that given a choice between lying and invoking her right to privacy (which is a completely legit thing to do even in a long term marriage), she never lied to me. This is the best way to ensure that you either get no answer at all, or if you do get an answer it is truthful. Then I referenced last weekends conversation and mentioned that we never talked about HER ideal frequency. She changed the subject. I bantered with her a bit and asked once more. She changed the subject. 

So tonight I am going to manual over ride to "finish" before we start. And then we can kiss and hug and watch tv and go to sleep since I am not a 2 rounds in one night kind of guy. Well at least not at this point a stones throw from 50. So I will get to see what it is like to play without completion.


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## FormerNiceGuy (Feb 13, 2012)

MEM11363 said:


> So after all this philisophical debate about whether or not "it" can be good for your partner even if they don't reach the finish line, I am going to do an experiment.
> 
> As for background:
> - Her condition continues to cause her pain "down there"
> ...


Mem, this is one confusing post.

1. Can't have intercourse, so its always....anal?
2. What is her condition?
3. What is your experiment?
4. What is a manual override?

I need a user's manual to understand


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## dymo (Jan 2, 2012)

Hmmmm.... How would you feel if her ideal frequency is actually 0?

It may no longer be something she actually enjoys. Indeed, it causes her pain. Could this be something she is now doing only for you? A trade of sex for love, if you will?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## LovesHerMan (Jul 28, 2011)

So, Mem, what happened with your experiment?


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## Havesomethingtosay (Nov 1, 2011)

As I have always said mem11363.... We may not agree often, but I do wish you and your spouse the best.....


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## humanbecoming (Mar 14, 2012)

Well, it's been a week... I think mem discovered how fun "manual overdrive" is, and hasn't left the shower since!


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## MEM2020 (Aug 23, 2009)

Dymo,
She has no pain, as we do nothing that might cause her pain. 

Sex for love. Seems like it to me.



OTE=dymo;681636]Hmmmm.... How would you feel if her ideal frequency is actually 0?

It may no longer be something she actually enjoys. Indeed, it causes her pain. Could this be something she is now doing only for you? A trade of sex for love, if you will?
_Posted via Mobile Device_[/QUOTE]
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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