# What if you found out that your wife was a pornstar before you married her?



## vincent555 (Aug 18, 2014)

I know this sounds kind of ridiculous. Now since alot of people who are browsing CWI subforum have been betrayed by there SO, I'm wondering how would you react if you discovered that before you met your wife/husband, she/he was a porn actor that made lets say 20 - 30 vids? And she/he never told you about it for the fear of getting dumped? would you instantly divorce? or would you get over it and say "almost everyone had sexual lives before they got married so its normal"?

Just curious..


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## staystrong (Sep 15, 2012)

Uhm...

Uhhh...

I think I would throw up. 

Then I would feel some sympathy for her that I was divorcing. 

But then of course the anger that she lied and wasted my time.

I don't think I could love a porn star. I'm sure some guys can, and they have a different outlook. 

I did date a Gold Club stripper for a year and a half, and knew all about that lifestyle. She was a PhD student as well. Amazing money in that business, and some very unusual lifestyles. I don't know how a man could share a woman.


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## PhillyGuy13 (Nov 29, 2013)

Sorry she did that to you man. You had a right to know before she married you. Get tested for STDs.

Do you have a link to the videos? Asking for a friend.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## russell28 (Apr 17, 2013)

I would have recognized her... no way this could happen.


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## vincent555 (Aug 18, 2014)

PhillyGuy13 said:


> Sorry she did that to you man. You had a right to know before she married you. Get tested for STDs.
> 
> Do you have a link to the videos? Asking for a friend.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


It didn't happen to me. I am just curious of what most people here would do if they were to be in that situation.


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## russell28 (Apr 17, 2013)

Buy a new high def video camera?


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## PhillyGuy13 (Nov 29, 2013)

So this is all phony- baloney. Got it. Shocked.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## BradWesley (May 24, 2013)

I'd worry if you weren't packing at least 9 inches


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## russell28 (Apr 17, 2013)

Instead of saying 'you're no pornstar yourself' I'd have to come up with something else...


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

I wouldn't stay with her....

Unless it was Gianna Michaels.... I don't think I could turn her down....


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## Forest (Mar 29, 2014)

Somewhere in America, this scenario is truly being played out, though.

Maybe.


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## staystrong (Sep 15, 2012)

I'm sure it's happened.

I believe there was a thread on TAM once about someone's wife being an escort.

I don't doubt there are some "reformed" sex workers who got tired of the business and wanted to settle down with a good guy. I think they would have to lie in order to land a normal guy. Or maybe a very understanding guy could see past that. Human relationships come in many shapes and colors.


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## badmemory (Jul 31, 2012)

Let's ask Charley Sheen.


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

I would be pissed beyond words. Not about being a porn star, but by getting vanilla sex all these years.


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## richie33 (Jul 20, 2012)

I would feel I was lied too....what else is she not telling me. Postpone the wedding and take a long, hard look to see if I could handle this information.


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## davecarter (Aug 15, 2013)

Troll-thread, for a start...but just for sh!ts and giggles, if i found out?
I'd be like (_sings in choral-voice_): "Haaaa-le-lujah!"


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## thummper (Dec 19, 2013)

bandit.45 said:


> I wouldn't stay with her....
> 
> Unless it was *Gianna Michaels*.... I don't think I could turn her down....


Gorgeous isn't she......*sigh*


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## vincent555 (Aug 18, 2014)

davecarter said:


> Troll-thread, for a start...but just for sh!ts and giggles, if i found out?
> I'd be like (_sings in choral-voice_): "Haaaa-le-lujah!"


Dont see where is the trolling in it, I'm pretty sure it happened to some.


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## Pufferfish (Sep 25, 2013)

russell28 said:


> I would have recognized her... no way this could happen.


Ha. I'd second that. If she somehow slipped through, I think this situation is a little different from a wife who lied about her previous sexual partners. 

I would assume that if I married her, she obviously did right by me. 

As long as she:-

a). Did it for the money to earn a living;
b). was not doing it while we were dating;
c). has quit the business for good;
d). had not given me a STI and had taken steps to confirm a clean bill of health before we started having sex, 

I would probably understand her need to cover it up and leave it as that. 

Same goes if she previously worked as a call girl.


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## davecarter (Aug 15, 2013)

vincent555 said:


> Dont see where is the trolling in it, I'm pretty sure it happened to some.


I wish it was me.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Pufferfish said:


> Ha. I'd second that. If she somehow slipped through, I think this situation is a little different from a wife who lied about her previous sexual partners.
> 
> I would assume that if I married her, she obviously did right by me.
> 
> ...


So you are ok with a porn star or a call girl. But not with a woman who has dated some guys and had sex with them?

And people say women are make no sense? :scratchhead:


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## thatbpguy (Dec 24, 2012)

vincent555 said:


> I know this sounds kind of ridiculous. Now since alot of people who are browsing CWI subforum have been betrayed by there SO, I'm wondering how would you react if you discovered that before you met your wife/husband, she/he was a porn actor that made lets say 20 - 30 vids? And she/he never told you about it for the fear of getting dumped? would you instantly divorce? or would you get over it and say "almost everyone had sexual lives before they got married so its normal"?
> 
> Just curious..


My first wife was a perfect 10 in nearly every regard. She became sexually active at age 14. She had a long string of lovers in their 30's until she was 21 and we met. She had even turned a couple of tricks as a better paid call girl (er, prostitute) when she was 18 or so. She wanted to turn her life around and told me all this. For me, it was a huge turn on. The things that woman knew!! I was a green kid that just fell off the watermelon truck from a small town to a big city not too long before. 

That said, if she had been an out and out porn performer I might have some self doubts.


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## Q tip (Apr 15, 2014)

Did you get an autograph for the beta-max version?

Hey, porn stars have feelings too. Let's show some respect... They aren't like clowns or condors. Your kid's kids could say some day "grandma was a pornstar". How cool is that.


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## staystrong (Sep 15, 2012)

EleGirl said:


> So you are ok with a porn star or a call girl. But not with a woman who has dated some guys and had sex with them?
> 
> And people say women are make no sense? :scratchhead:


Who said they aren't okay with a woman who has dated some guys and had sex with them?

Do you mean dating multiple guys at once? Whatcha saying?


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

staystrong said:


> Who said they aren't okay with a woman who has dated some guys and had sex with them?
> 
> Do you mean dating multiple guys at once? Whatcha saying?





Pufferfish said:


> Ha. I'd second that. If she somehow slipped through, *I think this situation is a little different from a wife who lied about her previous sexual partners. *
> I would assume that if I married her, she obviously did right by me.
> 
> As long as she:-
> ...


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## staystrong (Sep 15, 2012)

Q tip said:


> Did you get an autograph for the beta-max version?
> 
> Hey, porn stars have feelings too. Let's show some respect... They aren't like clowns or condors. Your kid's kids could say some day "grandma was a pornstar". How cool is that.


It begs the question, how many porn stars go on to have kids?


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## crossbar (Aug 25, 2011)

EleGirl said:


> So you are ok with a porn star or a call girl. But not with a woman who has dated some guys and had sex with them?
> 
> And people say women are make no sense? :scratchhead:


 I think what doesn't make sense is that a woman that has slept with several guys, did so in the privacy of the bedroom. 

With a pornstar, I don't think that a guy wants his friends to watch a video of his wife taking it from both ends from a few years ago! 

" Hey guys, it's halftime at the superbowl. Do you want to watch the halftime show or Bob's wife getting railed?"


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## staystrong (Sep 15, 2012)

Oh, that's easy. 

It's purely the deception.

I'd rather know you did it for money at a time in your life, your honest about it now, you decided your limits, etc. .. than to find out you slept around with twenty guys and said it was only seven.

I might not marry the escort, but I'd be upset if I married the woman and found out she was "easy" in high school and never told me. It would make me think twice about her integrity.


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## staystrong (Sep 15, 2012)

crossbar said:


> I think what doesn't make sense is that a woman that has slept with several guys, did so in the privacy of the bedroom.
> 
> With a pornstar, I don't think that a guy wants his friends to watch a video of his wife taking it from both ends from a few years ago!
> 
> " Hey guys, it's halftime at the superbowl. Do you want to watch the halftime show or Bob's wife getting railed?"


I agree.

If it's on video, it can be found. 

And you don't want that. 

Girls, be very careful who you make sex tapes with.


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## thatbpguy (Dec 24, 2012)

crossbar said:


> I think what doesn't make sense is that a woman that has slept with several guys, did so in the privacy of the bedroom.
> 
> With a pornstar, I don't think that a guy wants his friends to watch a video of his wife taking it from both ends from a few years ago!
> 
> " Hey guys, it's halftime at the superbowl. Do you want to watch the halftime show or Bob's wife getting railed?"


Put in a very earthy way- but the point is well received.


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

richie33 said:


> I would feel I was lied too....what else is she not telling me. Postpone the wedding and take a *long, hard* look to see if I could handle this information.


Giggity!


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## staystrong (Sep 15, 2012)

ha! Caught that one, too


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## Pufferfish (Sep 25, 2013)

crossbar said:


> I think what doesn't make sense is that a woman that has slept with several guys, did so in the privacy of the bedroom.
> 
> With a pornstar, I don't think that a guy wants his friends to watch a video of his wife taking it from both ends from a few years ago!
> 
> " Hey guys, it's halftime at the superbowl. Do you want to watch the halftime show or Bob's wife getting railed?"


That's a good point. :smthumbup:

I'd rather stumble across my mates watching a porntube video of her getting railed than having her hang out with ex-boyfriends that I don't know were her ex-boyfriends.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

staystrong said:


> Oh, that's easy.
> 
> It's purely the deception.
> 
> ...


Keep in mind that the scenario given here is that the porn start lied too.

So porn star lies is ok.

Some women who slept with a few guys lied about some of them... she's trash, not good.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Pufferfish said:


> That's a good point. :smthumbup:
> 
> I'd rather stumble across my mates watching a porntube video of her getting railed than having her hang out with ex-boyfriends that I don't know were her ex-boyfriends.


Your assuming that the ex-boy friends are you mates. Might not be the case at all.


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## borninapril (Jun 6, 2011)

In this day and age I think it would be a little hard to hide that sort of thing if someone was really looking for it, but the sheer amount of porn out there now might take a while to go through. I know in the 80's some Adult Stars would sign agreement so that their movies wouldn't be able to be shown in the US, only in Europe or other places. That way they could go about a seemingly normal life here in the States.

As for stars having kids after they quit the business, it happens all the time. It's a horrible business to be in. My sister in laws sister was a big time cam models (and still does it) and I've seen her make lot of money, lose it all and make more. Now she's in Vegas running a cam model company and raising several kids. I often wonder what those kids (and their friends) will think in a couple years when they become teenagers.


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## staystrong (Sep 15, 2012)

EleGirl said:


> Keep in mind that the scenario given here is that the porn start lied too.
> 
> So porn star lies is ok.
> 
> Some women who slept with a few guys lied about some of them... she's trash, not good.


No, the porn star lying is not okay. 

I was referring to the modified scenario of someone telling the truth upfront about paid sex versus someone lying extensively about regular hook-up or relationship sex.

I would never marry a porn star or escort, personally. 

However, I do support wives bringing out their inner porn star.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

bandit.45 said:


> I wouldn't stay with her....
> 
> Unless it was Gianna Michaels.... I don't think I could turn her down....


I just Googled her. She is very pretty, Bandit, so I agree with you.:smthumbup::rofl:

Though as a side point, before I met her, my wife wrote erotic stories for what was then the UK's top erotic fiction magazine. (Though she told me about this very early in our relationship.)

And by coincidence a few years ago I was talking to a fellow journalist who told me her first paid job had been as a sub-editor on that very same magazine... at the same time my wife was writing for them.  Funny old world, isn't it?


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

MattMatt said:


> I just Googled her. She is very pretty, Bandit, so I agree with you.:smthumbup::rofl:
> 
> Though as a side point, before I met her, my wife wrote erotic stories for what was then the UK's top erotic fiction magazine. (Though she told me about this very early in our relationship.)
> 
> And by coincidence a few years ago I was talking to a fellow journalist who told me her first paid job had been as a sub-editor on that very same magazine... at the same time my wife was writing for them.  Funny old world, isn't it?


I wonder....

Did your wife right adultery stories?


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## workindad (May 7, 2011)

Interesting question- I would certainly feel lied to.

In this scenario, is she still friends with the girls she used to work with and do they visit us? Wait, that doesn't matter.


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## Marduk (Jul 16, 2010)

What a bizarre question.

If she told me before we got married, one thing.

If I found out after, another thing.

OP, is this something you're actually worried about or are you having insecurities about your wife's past?


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## vincent555 (Aug 18, 2014)

marduk said:


> What a bizarre question.
> 
> If she told me before we got married, one thing.
> 
> ...


Not really no, both me and my wife were married pure virgins. and we have our boundaries set clear right after we married, I dont have any female friends (never had any), and she doesnt have any male friends (she also never had any). this question is just out of curiosity.


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## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good evening all
It wouldn't bother me at all, as long as it didn't bother her. If she didn't seem embarrassed by her past (after I said it was OK) I might even want to see some of the old videos ..especially the ones with other women

There isn't a lot my wife could have done before we met that would really bother me.


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## HarryDoyle (Jan 19, 2013)

What you left out is how did I find out she was a porn star? Did she finally tell me? Or.......... Or did someone at work tell how "talented" my wife is. (wink, wink, nudge, nudge)


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## Catherine602 (Oct 14, 2010)

I'd get a full panel of STD tests.


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

HarryDoyle said:


> What you left out is how did I find out she was a porn star? Did she finally tell me? Or.......... Or did someone at work tell how "talented" my wife is. (wink, wink, nudge, nudge)


Daaaaaaaaaamn...

Y'know... I'll bet that WhiteRaven would just love this thread.


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## russell28 (Apr 17, 2013)

EleGirl said:


> Keep in mind that the scenario given here is that the porn start lied too.
> 
> So porn star lies is ok.
> 
> Some women who slept with a few guys lied about some of them... she's trash, not good.


Porn stars can lie, because they're porn stars.. "Some women" that sleeps around can lie and it'll be okay, when she becomes a porn star.


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

And we talk about how some women want the bad boys....well some guys want the bad girl too. 

The key point here is the lie of omission, and the relationship is based on a lie. There was a thread here long ago where the guy was in a similar type situation, and he refused to R because he said their marriage was based on a lie. 

I really don't know who I would react. Should she be held accountable for what she did prior to our relationship and has been a model spouse for years? Or would I D because of the lie of omission? The deciding factor I think would be children and her faithfulness during our marriage.


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## staystrong (Sep 15, 2012)

vincent555 said:


> Not really no, both me and my wife were married pure virgins. and we have our boundaries set clear right after we married, I dont have any female friends (never had any), and she doesnt have any male friends (she also never had any). this question is just out of curiosity.


A porn *star* is different than someone who had been in a porn film once or twice. 

I could see forgiving the one-time actress, but not the porn star. You can't dupe someone like that and expect they'd forgive your lie of omission.


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## davecarter (Aug 15, 2013)

vincent555 said:


> Not really no, both me and my wife were married pure virgins. and we have our boundaries set clear right after we married, I dont have any female friends (never had any), and she doesnt have any male friends (she also never had any). this question is just out of curiosity.


Sounds like fun.


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## Acoa (Sep 21, 2012)

The problem here would be the lie of hiding that part of her past. And again how you find out. Did she tell you because she wanted you to know. Or did you find out and she admit it?

Either way it would be obvious that you didn't spend enough time prior to marriage getting to know each other. And if it was a long courtship and this never came up, another big problem. 

There are a lot of it depends. But I'd rather know up front, and if I dates someone for a long time, then went though the engagement period and a wedding, then they told me. Divorce would be my primary thought. The depends would have to be pretty overwhelming to contain that much ****e. (See what I did there).


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## carmen ohio (Sep 24, 2012)

vincent555 said:


> I know this sounds kind of ridiculous. Now since alot of people who are browsing CWI subforum have been betrayed by there SO, I'm wondering how would you react if you discovered that before you met your wife/husband, she/he was a porn actor that made lets say 20 - 30 vids? And she/he never told you about it for the fear of getting dumped? would you instantly divorce? or would you get over it and say "almost everyone had sexual lives before they got married so its normal"?
> 
> Just curious..


I'd be upset -- although not nearly as upset as I would be if I discovered that she had been a liberal Democrat before marrying me.


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## snerg (Apr 10, 2013)

richardsharpe said:


> There isn't a lot my wife could have done before we met that would really bother me.


I really wouldn't care - provided that we didn't have a dull sex life.

If the sex life was dull, there would have to be some paradigm shifts going forward after finding out.

As to buddies finding out - if she was so hot that they checked up, then I get to be a pig and have bragging rights as to how good I am - I was able to pull a porn star away from the industry (or at least that will be my story that I stick to)!


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

If this happened to me...my old ladies last film would be a spanking video.

Maybe not the last but I would have to up date my camcorder.


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## Thor (Oct 31, 2011)

I would divorce her because of the deception. She proved herself not worthy of my trust, and I would not stay married to an untrustworthy person.


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## BWBill (Jan 30, 2013)

Paul McCartney paid Heather Mills $36 million to go away.


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## Dyokemm (Apr 24, 2013)

"I'd be upset -- although not nearly as upset as I would be if I discovered that she had been a liberal Democrat before marrying me."

:rofl:

I understand your point, but in reverse.

If I discovered my partner was a conservative Republican, especially of the Tea Party variety, and a Dubya/Cheney supporter, I might have to consider moving on too.


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

I would ask "Where's the damn money?"


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## murphy5 (May 1, 2014)

lordmayhem said:


> The deciding factor I think would be children and her faithfulness during our marriage.


AND, maybe if she still has the contact info of her ex pornstar lesbian friends???:rofl::rofl::rofl:


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

bandit.45 said:


> I wonder....
> 
> Did your wife right adultery stories?


No, oddly enough, she didn't.


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## JCD (Sep 2, 2012)

We all have things in our past we are humiliated and embarrassed about. Some are more egregious than others.

I think the porn star lie is slightly worse than 'I actually had sex with twice the men I told you', though I think the liar is now on the hook for being PERFECTLY CLEAR on her past. She doesn't get the privacy expectation any more. (i.e. If the woman said 'I had a sordid past I don't want to detail' I might buy that. If she stated she didn't sleep with Rod and I found out differently, she now owes me a full list. Sorry, you are a liar)

Let's flip it around a bit: men, if you were a felon or had an embarrassing arrest in your past, however minor, would you a) tell and b) feel she was justified if she divorced you for lying about your past?

If that seems too unlikely, would you tell your girlfriend you had ever solicited a prostitute? Seems critical but embarrassing information going into a relationship.

Still...using that metric, I would probably still not marry such a woman (though if I was already married with kids and it had been happy, I would have some hard thinking to do...) though I would be sympathetic to her self imposed plight. It's a rough place to be.


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## over20 (Nov 15, 2013)

Runs like Dog said:


> I would ask "Where's the damn money?"


:rofl::rofl:


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## Q tip (Apr 15, 2014)

I would have to be the biggest dumbass I ever knew. To be with someone and not have a clue of who she is and was?

Poor judgement or dream wife. It's all in the arms of the beholder I guess...


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## Thor (Oct 31, 2011)

JCD said:


> Let's flip it around a bit: men, if you were a felon or had an embarrassing arrest in your past, however minor, would you a) tell and b) feel she was justified if she divorced you for lying about your past?


Yes and Yes.

I've told my wife everything. Not just what she asked about, but everything even down to the time I was about 7 yrs old and shoplifted a candy bar which my mom made me take back and apologize to the clerk.

A potential spouse has the right to know everything which may affect the relationship. A criminal record or just an embarrassing arrest could come into play in many unforeseen ways in the future.


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## bfree (Sep 30, 2012)

I know a guy who married a former stripper. Poor bastard is always nervous.


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## PhillyGuy13 (Nov 29, 2013)

bfree said:


> I know a guy who married a former stripper. Poor bastard is always nervous.


It has to be embarrassing to go grocery shopping. And having to pay in singles.


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## bfree (Sep 30, 2012)

*Re: Re: What if you found out that your wife was a pornstar before you married her?*



PhillyGuy13 said:


> It has to be embarrassing to go grocery shopping. And having to pay in singles.


LOL!


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## QuietSoul (Feb 11, 2012)

My H wasn't a pornstar but he is a sex addict in recovery, make of that what you will. He told me before we were active and said he was free of STDs. I would not have been cool if he lied to me before we were active.

Which raises a second question... how would you respond if you found out your spouse use to visit brothels or titty bars?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## davecarter (Aug 15, 2013)

bfree said:


> I know a guy who married a former stripper. Poor bastard is always nervous.


Nervous of her stripping again...or cheating?


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## bfree (Sep 30, 2012)

*Re: Re: What if you found out that your wife was a pornstar before you married her?*



davecarter said:


> Nervous of her stripping again...or cheating?


Probably both. No way to live imo.


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## JCD (Sep 2, 2012)

bfree said:


> Probably both. No way to live imo.


If she's 'former', then she's former. He needs to let it go. Can't control people.

IF she slips...well...that's on her.

But I understand the fear of losing something you value. He should let her know she is valuable to him...and make sure she values him.


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## bfree (Sep 30, 2012)

*Re: Re: What if you found out that your wife was a pornstar before you married her?*



JCD said:


> If she's 'former', then she's former. He needs to let it go. Can't control people.
> 
> IF she slips...well...that's on her.
> 
> But I understand the fear of losing something you value. He should let her know she is valuable to him...and make sure she values him.


I agree but you must admit it's easier said than done. He was unaware of her former occupation before they married but in fairness he admits he never really asked or pried too much into her past. They met at church (that's where I met both of them) and he very much believes that she has repented and left that life behind. Still every now and then part of that life resurfaces and it causes him great anxiety. Her too for that matter. I know she's had to work very hard to learn how to establish and maintain strong boundaries. I feel she still has a lot to learn in that regard. From what I can see they are an extremely devoted loving couple. But you know what they say. You can't run from your past. He's told me a few stories that would make your hair stand up. I'm not sure I could deal with his situation even if I did love her like he obviously does.


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## Regret214 (Apr 22, 2012)

Funny enough, Dig was a male dancer for two years before we met. I remember when we moved in together he "retired" his g strings to the trash. LOL

I like to tease him about it when we're out somewhere and there's a post or a pole!

As to the comment about brothels or titty bars...well, they're quite different. You go to a brothel for sex. Period. You go to a strip club for fantasy. The likelihood of a guy hooking up with a dancer are slim. Their job is to make every guy feel as if they're the only one in the bar. Why? To keep getting tips. She moves on to the next guy when the money runs out. It's business.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

I think I'd be pretty upset that it wasn't disclosed, but how I'd react or what I'd do would depend on the current circumstances and the background. It could range from "Eww!" to "Aww! She gave up her career for me!" LOL


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## Dad&Hubby (Aug 14, 2012)

bfree said:


> I know a guy who married a former stripper. Poor bastard is always nervous.


My high school girlfriend went on to become a stripper after we broke up.....

Still not sure how to take that...:scratchhead:


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Dad&Hubby said:


> My high school girlfriend went on to become a stripper after we broke up.....
> 
> Still not sure how to take that...:scratchhead:


I had a girlfriend in high school who did the same thing. Put herself through college. She is a mother of four now.


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## Dyokemm (Apr 24, 2013)

In my recent years of mostly unattached fun and adventure, I have casually dated 3 girls who have been strippers.

Never bothered me any...but of course I wasn't looking to have a serious R with any of them either.


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## michzz (Jun 6, 2008)

It would depend on the circumstances of why she had been involved in that, why she didn't tell me, and how I found out.

If she truly had left that all behind, was disease-free and had no interest in that kind of thing and valued monogamy, there would be a shot at staying together.

If she was deceptive in any way for any reason, it would be over.

And, of course, no contact with anyone from those days.

Therapy would be good.


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

he found out when she stopped having sex the day after they married. she actually said she was traumatized by it and now has a very low sex drive.And only has sex with the lights out in missionary. she now has low self esteem because of the 80lbs she gained.


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## JCD (Sep 2, 2012)

michzz said:


> It would depend on the circumstances of why she had been involved in that, why she didn't tell me, and how I found out.
> 
> If she truly had left that all behind, was disease-free and had no interest in that kind of thing and valued monogamy, there would be a shot at staying together.
> 
> ...


That would be hard because her entire social network would likely be limited to other women in the industry or sympathetic to the same. 

I think her REAL friends would be happy she was able to get a 'normal life' and not advertently try to mess things up for her (it is the inadvertent stuff you need to watch for)


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