# What would I have done differently?



## AFEH

I fell in love with my wife the instant I saw her and I stayed in love with her for 42 years. She was a truly wonderful woman in many many ways and I was truly blessed to have her by my side for all that time. I’ve been thinking about what would I have done differently and how can my experiences help others.

The biggest thing for me is what we should have done with our anniversaries. I think like many couples our anniversaries were a time to be romantic, perhaps more than usual. The flowers, special meals maybe even a holiday to celebrate another year together.

But anniversaries are a good time for many other things. Making plans for next year and reviewing last years plans, were the objectives with savings, expenditure, children etc. accomplished? Are we still getting the best mortgage deal or shall we move to a new provider. This alone can save a couple 10s of thousands over the years. And what about increasing the payments and paying it off early and save even more money. And how are we doing with our longer, 5, 10 year term plans and do they need any modifications. I’ve come to understand that many marriages come to an end because of the bitterness and resentment that can slowly build up until it becomes intolerable. I think bitterness and resentment is like a malignant cancer in a marriage and if it’s not operated on early it will surely end up killing the marriage. Because love cannot coexist with let alone grow and mature when there’s a lot of bitterness and resentment there. So we should be seriously honest, open and frank with one another and look within our hearts and see if bitterness and resentment is living their due to some offence or offences in the past 12 months. And if there are we should work together in such a way that the resentment is cleansed from our hearts. And I most certainly would have gone on a marriage enrichment program.


----------



## Lon

AFEH said:


> But anniversaries are a good time for many other things. Making plans for next year and reviewing last years plans, were the objectives with savings, expenditure, children etc. accomplished? Are we still getting the best mortgage deal or shall we move to a new provider. This alone can save a couple 10s of thousands over the years. And what about increasing the payments and paying it off early and save even more money. And how are we doing with our longer, 5, 10 year term plans and do they need any modifications...


If you are talking about the anniversary of your wedding date, I say, ABSOLUTELY NO WAY - you can review your mortgage the week after your anniversary celebration. In my M I too should have done "more" to plan our anniversaries, but I'm talking about ROMANTIC stuff to celebrate that which you LOVE.


----------

