# Self image/body issues



## trini (Jun 19, 2014)

Does a person's battle to be fit and healthy...and happy in own's own skin change when one gets older vs when one is younger. Once you are married, and have a child and are no longer going out as much, or trying to look sexy and be attractive to get guys to ask you out, when does it change how important your weight is. Why should I strive to be 15 pounds lighter (vs slightly plump) if I am healthy in both instances (medically) and the only sole reason for the 15 pounds weight loss is to look sexy in society's standards in front of the world when I can still feel sexy to myself and look sexy in a sling dress to my husband and it doesn't matter anymore. 

I know being fit and sexy and healthy is ALWAYS more fun than being plump no matter what age you are but Does it become LESS appealing with time? So in your early 20s when you are single and young vs. mid to late 30s with a kid, married vs. 40s with kids, married.

Just wondering.


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## bbdad (Feb 11, 2013)

I am in my 40's, self employed, 2 kids, married and in better shape than any point in my life previously. I am actually doing a body building show in 2 weeks. So, I am not sure the desire to be fit ever changes. 

However, if you hate exercise and you/your spouse are happy with your looks, then so be it. Just don't let yourself get overweight to the point of being unhealthy.


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## VermisciousKnid (Dec 27, 2011)

I think a lot of people fall in to the trap of thinking that if they are happy with their looks then their spouse should automatically be happy with them as well. But if you gained a bunch of weight after marriage or your husband traded his clean shaven look and trim physique for a mullet, beard, and beer belly would that change your relationship in some ways? Maybe. Maybe not. 

I think everyone should be able to deal with the changes caused by aging. Wrinkles and sagging are going to happen. It's normal. Weight gain could happen due to a sedentary lifestyle or medical conditions. Weight gain could also happen if you had been starving yourself before marriage and then began to eat normally after. 

In the end the only two who matter are you and your H.


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## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good evening all
In my opinion healthy and happy IS attractive. Healthy means whatever weight makes you feel good. 

I don't think people should strive to be athletes, but anyone under the age of 80 and without some disability should think that walking a mile or two on the beach with their partner would be a nice romantic thing to do, not a difficult chore.

Don't sweat the wrinkles - if you love someone you don't notice their wrinkles.


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