# Is it cheating?



## Philly8 (Mar 16, 2010)

Can you guys/gals clear this up for me...I'm just trying to wrap my head around things...

My wife has been moved out on/off since May and for good in November. I found out she slept with someone in July, and is now dating someone. We never filed formal separation papers or divorce papers. Obv, I'm trying to still save my marriage.

Is what she did/is doing considered cheating? Or is it considered acceptable since we are living apart?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Help239 (Oct 20, 2009)

IMHO, it depends on whatever you agreed to when you separated. In my situation, it was an open and shut case as my stb-X was still living at home when she started "dating" and kissing the OM.


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## Philly8 (Mar 16, 2010)

Help239 said:


> IMHO, it depends on whatever you agreed to when you separated. In my situation, it was an open and shut case as my stb-X was still living at home when she started "dating" and kissing the OM.


It was never discussed. Maybe that's my fault for not bringing it up, but honestly it never crossed my mind because I was never planning on doing anything like that myself, and never in a million years thought she would do it.


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## nice777guy (Nov 23, 2009)

I think someone with any decency would not do this unless you were legally separated or divorced. I tend to think that if you are still married - happily or not - under the same roof or not - sleeping with or even dating others is cheating.

The big problem here is that I get the idea she doesn't really care what you call it. Sounds like she's already moved on.


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## sue1168 (Feb 25, 2010)

nice777guy said:


> I think someone with any decency would not do this unless you were legally separated or divorced. I tend to think that if you are still married - happily or not - under the same roof or not - sleeping with or even dating others is cheating.
> 
> The big problem here is that I get the idea she doesn't really care what you call it. Sounds like she's already moved on.



Totally agree with this quote--if you're MARRIED, IT'S CHEATING! PERIOD.


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## lastinline (Jul 21, 2009)

I think this is pretty simple. If you're not divorced yet that means you're still married. If you're married, that means you're cheating. A better question to ask though is does it really change anything regardless of who is doing what, or in this case I guess who? 

I'm legally separated and in the beginning of a divorce. In essence my marriage is on hospice and is simply waiting to die. If my soon to be ex was discrete and could keep it from the kids, personally I could care less. However, that still wouldn't make it right. I'm just speaking from where I am at.

LIL


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