# Making an effort to Move on and get back on track - Help & Advice PLEASE?



## LastOneWontForget (Apr 1, 2011)

I have tried figuring things out on my own and doing things day to day in regards to my 'break-up/separation' but I am having problems with my ex and communications.

Here is the story.

It was a short relationship but I consider it a long one because of my age and where I am in life. Almost 4 years.

In the beginning I was a happy girl, independent and full of life and smiles and as the years went by, I felt like I was being broken down and my dreams and goals were being put on the back burner. I started to resent him and then finally myself for not following through with the person I was and the dreams and goals I set for myself.

We would have very angry and sometimes I would say dangerous arguments where verbal, mental & physical abuse would occur every few months.

I was picked apart and made to feel like anything I did was never good enough, I put myself in counseling for Anger-management and just therapy to get a grasp of why I had become the way I did while in this relationship. I am still making an effort to improve myself for my future and he refused to admit anything about himself ...even now, there's nothing wrong with him. Apparently I've been fighting with myself for the last 4 years...

Anyways, after going back and forth with him and thinking that things could be fixed and we'd get back on track - I've decided to move on and make a life for myself without him. He's also voiced that he wants to move on and that it is over.

I have accepted that it's over, I'm not angry anymore, or sad I just want to move on but the thing is, with things as simple as transfers, cancellations and our house and communicating, he is blatantly refusing to co-operate. Which has left me to do everything, which I've been doing day by day...

I am confused. Since he's voiced that he's ready to move on and so am I.. why can't he just make the transition easier for the both of us and just help me out when I ask .. It is not like I am phoning and texting to hang on - I am only doing so because I have to and these things concern him as well... I still care about the guy and would rather give him a heads up about something he may need to insure on his own .. I don't know common courtesy? All he does is just get angry and refuses to speak to me.. 

what should I do? I'm going about everything as civil as possible and certainly dont want to bring in lawyers to speed up the process with home renos and selling our house but it looks like I might have to..

Any feed back would be great. thank you


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## DelinquentGurl (Mar 25, 2011)

Unfortunately, you might have to get lawyers involved.

How long have you been separated? Is there a possibility that maybe he isn't so sure he wants it to be over and that is why he is dragging his feet?

It's really hard to know.
I would give him a timeline for how long you will sit on things before you take action.
If you do set one and he doesn't do anything about it, then follow through and take legal action if necessary.

I wish you the best of luck.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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