# Life after divorce



## mrshannahj (Nov 5, 2017)

Life after divorce was tough for me at first and learning to move on.It did hurt a lot when my ex husband cheated on me and realized I did the right thing.The moving on process has been going well.Giving myself time and already have someone interested in dating me,my co worker Gus.Gus and I already talked about it,told him give me time and he is letting me know this.Understands I went through a divorce and give me my time.Thinking getting back in the dating scene in July sometime letting Gus know when I am ready.


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

Ah, don't put any arbitrary dates on it. If you want to get out by this afternoon, go have a Saturday night date and have fun. 

If you feel like just sitting on the couch in your jammies eating ice cream for the next year, do that. 

Noone is watching you with a stop watch in their hand and checking off days on a calendar. 

You are an adult , free woman. Do what you want, when you want and with who you want.


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## Thor (Oct 31, 2011)

Something to consider is that you should be looking to date someone with a compatible goal for the relationship. Generally for a newly divorced person it would mean someone who is not looking for a long term relationship. Someone who's been out in the dating arena for a while may be looking to get remarried or at least for a possibly permanent ltr. They may be a wonderful person but you may not be ready for that kind of relationship yet.

I recommend you try some non-dating activities. Around here there are a lot of Meetup events which are not specifically dating but which are mingles. There's a Sunday afternoon coffee and board game mingle, for example. Those are good ways to meet people but not be on a date.

The online dating world is weird! I recommend you start with a free service such as *******. You can't browse profiles unless you have a profile yourself, so go with a free service and put up a nothing profile. Then start browsing men's profiles. You can pretty quickly get a feel for different styles and learn to spot those you might avoid vs those that look genuinely interesting to you.

Good luck and have fun!


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## mrshannahj (Nov 5, 2017)

Gus and I do hang out around even after work,he is single.We did go out last night as a non date night,played pool at a bar and let me win twice.He won twice as well.Gus says he has always liked me and we have a lot in common.Both Kiss fans is one of them.Our love of Camaros too.Gus and I talked today,said we may start dating in June.


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## Ynot (Aug 26, 2014)

My advice is that you should probably rethink Gus. If he is willing to wait around for you until July, he must not have a lot of other options going on. Most people, even if they like you aren't going to put all their eggs in one basket while waiting around for something that may or may not become something more. Just be careful, you might be getting more than you think.


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## mrshannahj (Nov 5, 2017)

Ynot said:


> My advice is that you should probably rethink Gus. If he is willing to wait around for you until July, he must not have a lot of other options going on. Most people, even if they like you aren't going to put all their eggs in one basket while waiting around for something that may or may not become something more. Just be careful, you might be getting more than you think.


He is willing to wait and really likes me.It maybe in May we will start dating


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## Bananapeel (May 4, 2015)

Ynot said:


> My advice is that you should probably rethink Gus. If he is willing to wait around for you until July, he must not have a lot of other options going on. Most people, even if they like you aren't going to put all their eggs in one basket while waiting around for something that may or may not become something more. Just be careful, you might be getting more than you think.


He might be dating others and just keeping this option open too...0


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## Ynot (Aug 26, 2014)

Bananapeel said:


> He might be dating others and just keeping this option open too...0


True, but given the OP and then the response I might suggest that the OP rethink the whole thing as well. If she knows she wants to date, why wait? Why not just date now? It seems like she has her eye set on Gus and is not really thinking about her own possibilities.


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