# Nude photos



## military guy

I am stationed overseas and have not seen my wife in 6 months. As a birthday gift to me my wife went out and had some nude photos of herself taken. When I found out the photos were taken by a husband and wife team it bothered me that another man would see my wife in that way. Am I being too sensitive? How would you guys feel about that?


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## D8zed

Hmmm, interesting. Where did you suggest she go to have them taken? Do you know the H/W team that took them? How was it arranged?


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## preso

military guy said:


> I am stationed overseas and have not seen my wife in 6 months. As a birthday gift to me my wife went out and had some nude photos of herself taken. When I found out the photos were taken by a husband and wife team it bothered me that another man would see my wife in that way. Am I being too sensitive? How would you guys feel about that?


That it was a husband and wife team to me, says you should not be too worried. 
It is a far better thing than her going to just a man. That there was a woman present, says to me, they were trying to do the right thing and be professional.


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## Racer

I'd say not to worry about, particularly since it was a husband wife team, and I assume it was a professional photographer (versus a "friend"). I'd actually think it was pretty cool and thoughtful. It says to me that she definately wants you thinking of her while you're over there, and that's she's thinking of you enough to actually have the courage to not only plan, but go through with posing nude for you.


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## military guy

D8zed said:


> Hmmm, interesting. Where did you suggest she go to have them taken? Do you know the H/W team that took them? How was it arranged?


I did not know she was doing it, it was a surprise to me. She had the best of intentions. It just made me sad to think of another guy seeing her naked.


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## FLgirl

Everything is ampliphied during a deployment. I think it is natural for you too feel uncomfortable with her having the pics taken in front of another man. I mean you wouldn't be a loving H if you didn't want to keep her all to yourself. I also know that when my H was deployed I would have dragged anyone off the streats to take the pics I sent him. My only focus at the time was my H and making sure he didn't forget what was awaiting him at home. I'm sure she didn't think about who was taking the pics.. her only focus was you. Try not to get caught up in who took the pics and just enjoy them until you can get to the real thing!!


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## Sven

Wow, what a great gift. Your wife must miss you and love you a ton. Don't worry one more second about professionals taking photographs. To me that even makes the gift better.

I would guess that these aren't the first nude photos this photographer has taken.

Smile! I wish I had photos like this of my wife when she was younger!


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## Atholk

OMG stop complaining, she's awesome! :smthumbup:

Most guys spend forty years trying to get this stuff to happen. :rofl:


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## Jimj_123

Hello, Military Guy. As a married man who is modest about nudity, I have a few questions. How old was the h/w team that took the pics? Was she covered up in any way - what was showing? Were they just innocent poses or something provocative? These questions may not makes total sense, I'm just trying to form an opinion.


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## military guy

Here is the website to where she went. Desert Blush Photography Phoenix, Arizona
It seems a very professional place. I love the pictures she sent me I just dont like that another guy had a part in taking them. It seems to me that my feelings are on the sensitive side, yet I cant help how I feel. I don't like it.


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## Mattie J

Military Guy,

I can see your point, there is nothing wrong with being selfish about your wife's nudity and I think it's noble that you feel that way. However, don't make your wife feel dirty for doing it or make her feel bad in her attempt to make you feel good. Her intentions were pure love for you and I would take it that way.

Be safe and return home soon!


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## psychocandy

I think you got the best wife in the world there too !!!


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## Sven

That seems to be the most professional type of photographs possible. I'm sure she wouldn't have been able to do that herself.

In high school I was a volunteer at the county hospital, working on the post-surgery floor. We had a patient that was extremely fat and had some kind of surgery on the crack of his ass. He had a skinny, "Olive Oil" type wife. She was so jealous of another woman seeing her husband's fat, bleeding butt crack that she wanted me to change the dressings instead of actual licensed nurses.

I've always carried that memory with me. Professionals are just that - professionals. Don't sweat it for one more second you lucky guy!


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## Jimj_123

This actually happened shortly after my wife and I were married. She was a bridesmaid in a friend's wedding. The dresses had arrived and we went to the bride's mom's house for her to try it on. She and the bride, the bride's mom and some other females had the dresses all laid out and in a large room that was attached to the room where the bride's dad and I, plus a couple of other men whom I can't recall were sitting. My wife had gone back and put the dress on. While they were checking it out in view of all of us guys, the bride's mom noted something that needed to be adjusted. She somehow unfastened the dress at the shoulders and lowered it down past my wife's waist. This left her standing in view of all of us men in her bra. I could have fainted! We guys were just chatting small talk but I know at least a couple of them glanced over and saw her that way. I was very uncomfortable with this. My wife was surprised by this but didn't say anything to make a scene. She said she was worried that I would be angry but that it was really no big deal to her that they saw her, that she was covered. Any thoughts on this, anyone?


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## psychocandy

Jimj_123 said:


> This actually happened shortly after my wife and I were married. She was a bridesmaid in a friend's wedding. The dresses had arrived and we went to the bride's mom's house for her to try it on. She and the bride, the bride's mom and some other females had the dresses all laid out and in a large room that was attached to the room where the bride's dad and I, plus a couple of other men whom I can't recall were sitting. My wife had gone back and put the dress on. While they were checking it out in view of all of us guys, the bride's mom noted something that needed to be adjusted. She somehow unfastened the dress at the shoulders and lowered it down past my wife's waist. This left her standing in view of all of us men in her bra. I could have fainted! We guys were just chatting small talk but I know at least a couple of them glanced over and saw her that way. I was very uncomfortable with this. My wife was surprised by this but didn't say anything to make a scene. She said she was worried that I would be angry but that it was really no big deal to her that they saw her, that she was covered. Any thoughts on this, anyone?


Wouldnt she be wearing less at the beach though?


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## Jimj_123

As far as coverage, maybe not. But is there no difference in her bra and a swimsuit? I'm curious what a variety of people would think. Is it appropriate to drop the top of the dress for adjustments with men close by? I've heard other stories about times during similar occasions when women would be trying on clothing, etc. without much privacy and it's often just joked about. I guess my question is - is there anything ethically or socially wrong with the way they did this? Would most women be comfortable with it?


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## Tweak

I would not appreciate it if my wife had dress problems and someone "adjusted" her stuff in front of others.Kinda rude.
However I see no difference in Bikini's/swim wear today and sexy underwear either.Basically women swim in their underwear but its called a bikini.

With the nude pics,she did it for you.She was thinking of you.She was not thinking about sex with any other only you.
Work this issue out privately within yourself,do not share it with her,it will undermine her future "Frisky-ness".I repeat do not tell her you have a issue with her doing this because it will be a resentment issue with her because she may think you do not appreciate it. 
I understand not liking the idea of another man seeing her nude.But how would you react to a male doctor giving her a exam?There is far more physical aspects to a doctor's exam with a female then with a few nude pics.
Just think about it and stay calm.You do not need to stress over this,you have enough worries being deployed without worrying about this.She was being thoughtful and I doubt she was thinking of anything else but you.She wanted you to pleasure yourself to her pics while you to are apart.She did not want you to have to use porn.
Hope this helps you a bit.


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## joevn

I agree with others. She rocks.


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## triton1984

I think I would have rather mixed emotions. She was thinking of you and for that she does rock but I could also see feeling a little kick in the nuts that another guy saw her nude and in person. I say all in all I would thank her and ask her to use a digital camera or video in future.


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## cowboyfan

I can see how that would be unsettling, but it sounds like this h/w team are professionals and I wouldn't be worried about it. Your wife is awesome.


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## sisters359

I am stunned that guys care so much about this. It suggests a possessiveness about the female body that is rather distressing. I guess men do not understand how sensitive women are about who has rights to exert control over our bodies--a history of lack of control over what happens to our bodies makes us pretty prickly on the issue. Maybe guys can relate better if you imagine yourself in prison and some other guy starts telling you he doesn't like it when you take off your shirt on the basketball court. . . Kind of an exaggerated analogy, but maybe not so much.

From my point of view, the only one who determines what is right or wrong about what is done with her body is the wife. Where is the line--telling her what she can wear (like a burqa), what her hair color should be, how much she must weigh, how big her boobs need to be? If you look at it from this perspective, OP, you can see why your reaction is a sign that maybe you have some unrealized sense of ownership over your wife's body. Stop and think about this, too: would you hesitate to have pics done of yourself b/c you feared it might make your wife mad at you for letting someone see your body? I'm curious as to whether any man would feel that way, frankly--and I know it would NEVER occur to me to hesitate b/c my guy would be mad I let someone else "see" me. I can't imagine being with someone who seems that insecure and attempts to infringe on MY BODY with his rules. OP, I'm not trying to attack you--I'm trying to get you to see how you appear to a woman on this issue. You see the other man as some type of "threat" to your "right" to be the only one to see your wife naked. You don't have such a right--she determines who gets to see her naked. If it doesn't bother her (and was not a sexual encounter or relationship in any way, which is of course a different ball of wax), it's a done deal. Let it go.

And to the poster who freaked out b/c his gf's bra showed--same answer. How insecure are you, that other men seeing your gf in her bra upsets you? This has nothing to do with you--you have no "right" that has been violated. You are a 3rd party and nothing more. It would be extremely inappropriate of you, for example, to confront the woman who undid the dress. If your gf had an issue with it, she could say something to the woman, but not you. The other woman didn't do anything to you! You are acting like she somehow damaged or hurt your "property." 

Maybe if you think of the phrase, "keep your 'rights' off my body" you can get the idea. In a marriage, there is an agreement not to engage in sexual behavior with anyone else. A married person agrees to that--and if s/he violates it, s/he has VIOLATED THE CONTRACT, s/he has not deprived you of any of your "rights." You don't have rights in or over another person's body. You can decide to get a divorce, for example, if you wife won't have sex with you, but you have no RIGHT to have sex with her against her will. 

hope this helps some of you men see how some of us women feel when men attempt to exercise any control over what we do with our bodies.


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## sisters359

It's probably not as important, but you guys must not have to strip in whole or in part in front of others as often as women do! Annual exams, pap smears, mammograms, once-a-month or more during pregnancy, trying on clothes with friends. . . none of it has any sexual connotation to us. It's all like being in the gym locker room. Nothing sexual about it. 

You see your wife as sexual, so maybe you are making two assumptions: a) every other guy sees her that way, every time; and b) she sees all other guys that way, all the time. Frankly, the logical errors in that type of thinking are so obvious that I'm surprised anyone thinks that way.


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## Tweak

Quote sisters359-"This has nothing to do with you--you have no "right" that has been violated. You are a 3rd party and nothing more."

I disagree he is her husband and has a valid concern.Although I am sure she did it with Him(the OP) and only Him(the OP) in mind.

Quote sisters359-"You see the other man as some type of "threat" to your "right" to be the only one to see your wife naked. You don't have such a right--she determines who gets to see her naked."

I disagree,once your married you are one flesh,her body becomes yours,as does the man's body become her's.

However "Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh."Ge 2:24

When a man looks upon my wife sexually,he is looking upon me to.

Quote sisters359 - "a history of lack of control over what happens to our bodies makes us pretty prickly on the issue"

And I agree with this in essence you are making this out to be like his wife is/was having a abortion or something.Which is a total different issue/topic altogether.

Husband and Wife are made one with marriage.

I agree,that its her body and his body.
But frankly in marriage and dating,the man is possessive of his female partner.It is in fact primal and natural to feel this way.Making it out to be horrid or a logical error is a bit harsh.

Women like to look pretty and sexy,they like to be looked at occasionally,women like a protective man to.
The OP is feeling protective.Now this can go to extremes with controlling behavior on the males part,trying to control what she wears is a example.
A man needs to know that it is ok to be protective,but not controlling.No woman likes a "control freak".


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## sisters359

> But frankly in marriage and dating,the man is possessive of his female partner.


It is not normal and ok. Protective is one thing (which we can all feel toward any other), "possessive" is another, and exactly the thing that needs to be addressed by the men who feel it. Possessive is cultural, not "natural," as we know from cross cultural studies, etc., and the very fact that many men do not feel they "own" the body of their female partner.

IF a couple accepts your standards of marriage, which are based on Scripture, and both parties assume they are one flesh, then yes, a man may feel PERSONALLY violated as though HE is being looked upon, like he would feel if HE was exposed naked to another. My deep suspicion is that the male reaction discussed here has nothing to do with that feeling of embarrassment or exposure but has everything to do with jealousy and a sense of ownership of her body. That was the tone of the thread, not at all about a man feeling "exposed" as though his flesh was naked. Even in a Scriptural analysis, jealousy and ownership are not the justification for a spouse's objection. Each spouse is expected to take into consideration what the other might be uncomfortable with for his/her OWN body, so a wife might consider that her husband would not want his body viewed naked by certain people. If that is the case, then out of respect for his sense of embarrassment about nakedness of his own body, she might refrain from exposing herself to the eyes of professional photographers (not all men would feel self conscious about posing nude, however). But she does not need to respect his sense of entitlement to HER body, nor does she have a right to feel entitled to HIS body as being under her control. One flesh means she treats her body as he treats his, not the right to control one another's bodies.


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## Tweak

Seriously the OP just came across to me as if he was worried about another guy looking on his wife with lust.

As the OP has not posted back we may never know exactly what made him uncomfortable about it.

I asked this to my wife.

If She was to get a tattoo on her arm,without telling me.Do I as her husband have the right to get mad?
My answer is that while I personally accept that it is her body,I felt she should have ran it by me first.
I then asked about me doing the same thing and she agreed with my statement above.She would like me to talk with her about it.

Now on the more intimate side of this.I asked what about a Bikini/butt area tattoo?
I would get very mad if done without me there.No body touches my woman.Period.I am not a jealous man,but I am protective of my wife.Not to be confused with controlling or a control freak, mind you.
She also agreed that if the rolls were reversed the same would apply.

I think you are wrong in that you think possessiveness is bad. 
My wife is my territory as I am hers.Everyone wants to be protected some what,to feel loved and cherished.

You seem to play a bit on words and take them for there worst meanings."Dominant" and "Possessive" is a example of words that have several degrees of meaning.I have posted about this to you before.
Now your using possessive as in control freak over jealous etc. etc.
I agree this is not healthy.
However the OP,wanting to protect his wife and also having EXCLUSIVE rights to see her nude feels a bit up set about her being seen by another guy.

If its no big deal to be seen nude by others,lets just all strip right now and run around nude.  LOL


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## Dryden

Good posts Tweak.

For the OP, I can understand the feelings about another man seeing your wife naked, but as tweak stated, it's a fear of them looking at her with Lust.

With it being a professional photographer and having his own wife present, it seems like a completely professional setting. She was thinking of you when she did this and your enjoyment at seeing them.

Now had it been some male friend taking the pictures, that would be a different story.


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## Holding Pattern

1. At least it wasn't, "Oh, my friend John took these for you."
2. I can understand the jealousy issue of someone else seeing her. Doesn't mean it is important or even worth a second though, but I can understand the twinge/
3. Be thankful she wants you to see her naked.

and maybe most important...

4. Be thankful she didn't send you a picture of her in sweats surrounded by snack food on the couch.


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## spanner

You are definitely being too sensitive about this. You're talking about nudes, right? NOT porn. Enjoy the gift and count your lucky stars.


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## CaliRN

could u email me those pics so i could get a better perspective of the situation???


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## lovinghimforever

Your wife ROCKS!

I would NEVER have the courage to have someone either see me or even take pictures of me nude.

She did it for YOU, with YOU in mind, to make YOU happy. ENJOY them!


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## dwaynewilliams

military guy said:


> I am stationed overseas and have not seen my wife in 6 months. As a birthday gift to me my wife went out and had some nude photos of herself taken. When I found out the photos were taken by a husband and wife team it bothered me that another man would see my wife in that way. Am I being too sensitive? How would you guys feel about that?


I see your point. I would feel a little raw about a guy (outside of a doctor) seeing my wife naked too. I don't care if his wife was with him, that wouldn't make me feel any better. But you have to try and let it slide, ultimately she is doing this for you.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## mike1

I know this is an old thread but I wanted to chime in since I was into photography part-time for several years. Mostly weddings & portraiture but I never got into boudoir photography; however it would have been something I would love to have pursued if I had stayed in the field. I've know a LOT of photographers, men & women that do this. It's very common for male photographers to team up with their wives or have a girlfriend of the subject present during the shoot. Boudoir photography is extremely popular and isn't anything to be concerned about. These photographers probably see many many clients every week or month like this. 

To me it's the same as being jealous of your wife's gyno. He gets to see, touch and feel the most intimate parts of your wife, right? Nope, the artist in me can appreciate the beauty of the female form without it being a perverted thing. Don't get me wrong though, there are plenty of hacks that would love to buy a cheap camera and market themselves as pro photographers just to snap some naked or lewd photos of women. It doesn't sound like that's the case here so be happy and enjoy the photos!!


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## SafetyTool

I'm sure her only thoughts were that she loved you and she wanted all your thoughts on her. I think it is special and sexy. 

Next time you look at the pictures she sent you think to yourself... OMG I am such a lucky man, my wife loves me enough to think this much of me, and best thought... who needs girlie mags when I have a wife like this!!!!


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## bacala787

I'd be perfectly fine with a husband and wife team - and the link you provided looks pro


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