# Would Same-Sex Married posters feel welcome here?



## dsGrazzl3D (Apr 22, 2013)

This was a question I had b/c of some other recent thread/post and thoughts of how marriage has been treated in the past. In middle ages it was used to continue a legacy. Like kings to "carry" the linage of family and the wife had a job to provide the husbands with home and sex. I think this is a very out-dated standard. I think this type of mind frame would upset most regardless of gender. 
This simple thought brought up the titled question. 
Would Same-Sex Married posters feel welcome here?

Do you think you could support a "same-sex marriage" in the same way as a "hetro. or tradtional" marriage issue?
I would hope that we all could deal with same-sex marriage issues w/o any prejudices. I like to think I would be welcoming to this new segment of "modern marriage". So let me hear from you about this issue?

I've not been on TAM for too long, so if this issue has been previously debated... I'd be interested in going through those thread/posts. Thanks in advance for keeping this mature and honest!


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

Of course. There have been quite a few since I've been here.


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## KathyBatesel (Apr 26, 2012)

Doesn't phase me. I'm not in anyone's bedroom but my own.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

I said yes. This is a marriage forum so married people (and unmarrieds! haha) can post.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Actually I like the term NON married. Gonna start using that from now on. "I'm non-married." LOL


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## Enginerd (May 24, 2011)

I've seen a few attempts from same sex partners. I'm not sure the knowledge base is here to help them. I know very little about the dynamics in a same sex relationship so I don't comment.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

I imagine it's the same as any other hetero couple, except both people are the same gender.

Everyone, regardless of straight/gay/bi has the same relationship issues--communication, sex, disrespect, laziness, happiness, in-laws, kids, etc.


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## Mavash. (Jan 26, 2012)

My therapist says the dynamic is the same so I'd give advice same as I would any other couple.


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

Yeah, I've just said the same things I would to any other couple. never really thought about it differently.


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## gbrad (Jul 20, 2010)

Well seeing as there is one guy and one woman in most of those relationships anyway, much of the advice would be the same. Given that, I marked no.


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## GTdad (Aug 15, 2011)

I'd be interested to hear from them as to whether they felt welcomed. I hope they do.


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## tulsy (Nov 30, 2012)

Sure...gay people are just as entitled to have dysfunctional marriages as the rest of us. 

I actually have a really hard time with people who do NOT accept homosexuals. They sure as hell should be welcome everywhere....they're human beings, and they need support too.


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

My thought is this... it doesn't matter whether one is personally for or against same sex marriages. They are already in relationships, regardless. Some post here already. They have gotten and given advice that pertains to their situation. As Jellybeans said, even people who are not married post here, asking for and giving advice. Why would they NOT be welcome? Seriously, personal feelings aside (for everyone)... they are asking for relationship advice. We are here to GIVE relationship advice. So, married or not, yes, welcome.


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## bfree (Sep 30, 2012)

In the CWI section there have been many posters who were in same sex marriages and they received the same love and support as any other poster. I don't understand why the question would even need to be asked frankly.


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## Nix (Jan 23, 2012)

I am in a long term same sex relationship. Marriage isn't legal in my state but I do consider us to be married due to the length of the r/s and the fact that in every way other than legally we are married.


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## Cosmos (May 4, 2012)

Sexuality is only one small part of what makes a person who they are. As long as what someone's doing in their love life is legal and consensual, they have the same respect from me as anyone else.


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## dsGrazzl3D (Apr 22, 2013)

bfree said:


> I don't understand why the question would even need to be asked frankly.


I was curious, mostly due to not finding much on that topic. I am not too familiar if there really is any difference in the dynamics. Again probably not a need to ask. I certainly did not attend to cause any offense.  `Just curious if anybody would 'own up; to having a issue with this topic. I think it seems most everybody agrees it is a non-issue.


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## Wiltshireman (Jan 23, 2013)

I would hope (and voted) that same sex couples would feel welcome here.

I know that I am "old fashioned" (my kids tell me so).
For me it has always been no sex outside of marriage and marriage is between one man and one woman but that is for me.
I would not dream of forcing my opinion / views on other people.

I believe that people are happier in a long term committed relationship of whatever type they choose (monogamy, same sex, polygyny, polyandry, etc) so if anyone comes for advice or help we should give it to them to the best of our ability.


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## bfree (Sep 30, 2012)

*Re: Re: Would Same-Sex Married posters feel welcome here?*



dsGrazzl3D said:


> I was curious, mostly due to not finding much on that topic. I am not too familiar if there really is any difference in the dynamics. Again probably not a need to ask. I certainly did not attend to cause any offense.  `Just curious if anybody would 'own up; to having a issue with this topic. I think it seems most everybody agrees it is a non-issue.


No offense taken. I guess I was wondering if someone had a bad experience and that was the genesis for the question.


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## committed4ever (Nov 13, 2012)

I see the whole issue of homosexuality as taking a slight shift. It's like whatever you say about the matter you better be PC or you're going to be crucified.


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## I'mInLoveWithMyHubby (Nov 7, 2011)

Yes, absolutely. They should anyways. The relationship between two people are no different whether what gender you choose.


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## bfree (Sep 30, 2012)

*Re: Re: Would Same-Sex Married posters feel welcome here?*



committed4ever said:


> I see the whole issue of homosexuality as taking a slight shift. It's like whatever you say about the matter you better be PC or you're going to be crucified.


I guess I'm not PC then because I certainly don't mince words with my gay friends. They call me a breeder and I call them....well never mind what I call them.


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## mablenc (Feb 26, 2013)

Aren't we over this yet? come on people....


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

bfree said:


> I guess I'm not PC then because I certainly don't mince words with my gay friends. They call me a breeder and I call them....well never mind what I call them.


And that's pretty much the point lol. Whether you think it's right or wrong doesn't matter. Even with your friends. As long as you have some sort of understanding between you, it really doesn't matter. There are SO many other subjects to discuss...


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

The dynamic are slightly different with a lesbian couple because it is very difficult for the hetero world to put relationship issues in a non hetero-centric perspective. It's a very slight difference. I'm sometimes called out on my hetero-centric perspective by my lesbian daughter and her fiancé. They are very kind and informative, so it has been quite the eye opening experience! 

My daughter is marrying a girl just like dear old Mom!


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## bfree (Sep 30, 2012)

*Re: Re: Would Same-Sex Married posters feel welcome here?*



Maricha75 said:


> And that's pretty much the point lol. Whether you think it's right or wrong doesn't matter. Even with your friends. As long as you have some sort of understanding between you, it really doesn't matter. There are SO many other subjects to discuss...


Yeah, I've been through too much in my life to take myself seriously and I doubt I could be friends with anyone who does. I tell my gay friends all the time that if I ever get reincarnated I want to come back as a gay man so I can punch my spouse in the mouth when he p!sses me off.


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