# Need man's opinion



## NJEH (Jan 11, 2011)

After a 20 year relationship, I'm dating again. I met a friend of my sisters/BIL's at a party a couple months back (my bil & him have been close friends for almost 20 years). He is 31, I'm 35. We hit it off immediately. We spent the night just talking and dancing. The next week he requested me on facebook, and we exanged a few e-mails, but nothing for a couple of weeks. Then on my b-day last week, he sent me a e-mail and then followed up with a call, were he also asked if I was going to this party on the weekend (which I was). He joked how he was going to hit on me that night. So the party on Sat, he finds me as soon as he gets there. We spend more and more time together as the night goes on. He is being a complete gentlemen, and we end the party with a kiss. Then, I get home, and there are text messages from him, trying to get me to come over, along with some very grafic details of what happen if I came over. 
I'm not a prude, but I did nothing to jump from the innocent kiss to that. My bil and so many others told me what a nice guy he was etc etc. Since then, we've texted a bit (innocent) but its different, awkward. I feel like he's pulling away? I don't know what to think. I really did like him. He said the age thing was not an issue for him (I do look young for my age) and he was really attracted to me. We had talked about going on a real date and he told me that it was up to me how serious I wanted to take this. What was he thinking? What should I do if I'm still interested. I don't want to chase him, but if he is feeling embarassed now, should I make the next move? I'm so rusty at this.


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## ozwang (Aug 11, 2011)

sounds like that night he was being a typical male, and was horny.

now he's embarrassed...

if you're interested in him I'd chase him, but only a little, just to let him know you're still keen, but not too much as to encourage graffic text massages again.

and 'the age thing'??? you're only a few years apart lol


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## mzladii (Dec 18, 2011)

probably like ozwang said, typical horny man LOL 
If you are still interested after the txt messages Id pursue him a little bit, but I'd be sure to address that the txts were inappropriate or made you uncomfortable, just be sure to set some boundaries and make sure you set a pace that your comfortable with.


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## deiswoman (Dec 5, 2011)

Yes, embarrassed. Phooey on him. He's a dip. The nicest guys can have the weirdest sex cravings. Don't worry about your age. It's not attractive to most men to see you worry about it and it just makes us women worry that we should be worried. Unless it's a baby making seeker that you want you don't want a guy who cares about it either!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## SockPuppet (May 16, 2011)

ozwang said:


> sounds like that night he was being a typical male, and was horny.
> 
> now he's embarrassed...
> 
> ...


:iagree:


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## Kobo (May 13, 2010)

IMO - He's just a guy that has no "game":

1 - He kissed you and wanted more but left and texted about it later after regretting he didn't push harder

2 - He talked to you about having sex. The path of greatest resistance for first time sexual encounters and something high schoolers do

3 - He's now embarrassed and hesitant when talking with you. Speaks to a lack of confidence

4 - He isn't taking the lead. He's deferring to you on "how serious you want to take it". Again, speaks of a lack of confidence (I'm assuming he wants a relationship.)


The Good:

You probably don't have to worry about him being much of a ladies man


The Bad:

You'll be in a relationship with someone who doesn't know how to treat a lady like a lady




Conclusion:

If you really clicked with him would you be asking strangers on if you should move forward with this? I say keep it as friends. 


All my opinion of course.


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

hes a loser move on to someone with some class.


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## sinnister (Dec 5, 2010)

He may have just completely misread the tea leaves.

Dudes should never assume they know what a woman is thinking...I don't and you don't. They are and always will remain a mystery.


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## YupItsMe (Sep 29, 2011)

You need to let him know you are not writing him off for what he did.

You can but dont have to mention it but if you want to continue your budding relationship, he will ikely lneed a little encouragement from you since his ego is taken a hit for messing things up a bit.

I dont think he will do it again unless he is an diot. 

If he does, you will have to be direct about it if you want 

1. it to stopo
2. want to help him 
3. are still interested but not that way


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## NJEH (Jan 11, 2011)

You guys are awesome. I think you are right, as well as about the confidence thing...or at least it seems to fade when its just him and I. We have been texting a bit the last few days but I feel like I have to lead the conversation. Maybe this is a guy thing. Ironically, I just had a a ha moment today...he looks like a younger version of my x, who also lacks confidence. So, I'm thinking a friendship may be best.


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