# Dating - Verify Divorce - Warning



## Emerald (Aug 2, 2012)

Broder's post is a good warning about dating "separated" people.

Also, it is a good idea to verify divorced as well.

My Brother (age 43 never married) married a woman 4 yrs. ago who said she was divorced. Met her online (sigh) & married in a small chapel. 3 mos. later when the marriage certificate never game, she confessed. She married him for his money, which was not substantial & the wedding presents; broke his heart.

Best friend met a man on Match. He listed as divorced for 10 yrs., lived alone; no sign of wife; asked her to marry him & she planned a wedding, blah, blah, only for him to finally confess the "divorce was never finalized." She gave him 3 yrs. of her life; broke her heart. 

Ask to see the Divorce Decree!


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## underwater2010 (Jun 27, 2012)

I have told many of my girlfriends that if the guys states he is seperated or divorced. Ask to see the signed paperwork. Never just take their word for it.


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## Emerald (Aug 2, 2012)

To clarify - the paper doesn't need to be whipped out on the first few dates, just if it gets serious.


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## ing (Mar 26, 2011)

I'm fckin framing mine


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## NextTimeAround (Dec 15, 2011)

**** He listed as divorced for 10 yrs., lived alone; no sign of wife; asked her to marry him & she planned a wedding, blah, blah, only for him to finally confess the "divorce was never finalized." ****

Why did he not finalise the divorce? Out of neglect or because he did not want to let go of his wife?

A friend of mine said she got separated and then she just forgot. When she was ready to marry again, she had to find her estranged husband to finalise things. This was in the 70s. But she was at least in "single" mode when she met her future second husband and not trying to run two men at the same time.

I have not bothered to get the papers for my divorce but I do hear from friends that he is remarried. So that must mean that we are divorced.


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## Sara8 (May 2, 2012)

NextTimeAround said:


> **** He listed as divorced for 10 yrs., lived alone; no sign of wife; asked her to marry him & she planned a wedding, blah, blah, only for him to finally confess the "divorce was never finalized." ****
> 
> Why did he not finalise the divorce? Out of neglect or because he did not want to let go of his wife?
> 
> ...



You don't need the papers, just the docket number. 

The fact that he is remarried doesn't prove he finalized the divorce.


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## Emerald (Aug 2, 2012)

NextTimeAround said:


> **** He listed as divorced for 10 yrs., lived alone; no sign of wife; asked her to marry him & she planned a wedding, blah, blah, only for him to finally confess the "divorce was never finalized." ****
> 
> Why did he not finalise the divorce? Out of neglect or because he did not want to let go of his wife?
> 
> ...


Good question.

His story was that he signed the divorce papers that his wife filed (he did not want the divorce) & he thought she filed him but she never did. She didn't file because she got to stay on his medical benefits! He damn well knew he wasn't legally divorced.


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## ScarletBegonias (Jun 26, 2012)

My ex did this to his girlfriend.We had only been separated for a few months but he told her he had been divorced for something like 10 years (technically he was telling the truth bc he divorced his first wife 10 years ago)but she had no idea i even existed and she had no idea i had just moved out 6 months prior and that we were still legally married.

She also had no idea he was still trying to get me to come home.


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

I kept trying to tell my sister to hold off on getting involved with her boyfriend because, slim as it may be, there is still that chance she could get snowed by him again and go back. Religious convictions have prevented them from getting physical, not even a kiss, so that aspect is still good. But the message she sends to the kids implies that dating while married is ok... doesn't matter that they are separated...she lives with our parents, he lives in another state. The point is, they are still married. And, until that last piece of paper is signed and filed, they will still be married.


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## Emerald (Aug 2, 2012)

It always amazes me how much people lie to get what they want.

I've learned the hard way.

Trust but verify.


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## wiigirl (Jun 14, 2012)

underwater2010 said:


> I have told many of my girlfriends that if the guys states he is seperated or divorced. Ask to see the signed paperwork. Never just take their word for it.


That or a case #, something verifyable.








_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ScarletBegonias (Jun 26, 2012)

a lot of states have a free judicial case search website.You can enter the name of your potential partner and get the information on divorces,child support cases,domestic abuse cases,restraining orders,and whether they're being sued for credit card nonpayment or anything else.It will also show you if they went to court for accidents or tickets ;-)


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## Mavash. (Jan 26, 2012)

Here I think info on divorces is a public record. It's kinda scary what info you can get with just a few keystrokes. My state has that free case search too.


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