# Raising the OP's baby?



## sakura (Sep 7, 2011)

Hello there!

I am just interested to see if there are any reconciled couples on this forum who had a pregnancy involved in the A and decided to raise the child together? Just interested in any experiences in this arena. Thanks!


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## Almostrecovered (Jul 14, 2011)

personally I couldnt cope with that, you have a lifelong trigger that I would subconsciously mistreat


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## sakura (Sep 7, 2011)

To play devil's advocate, couldn't you feel like at least you're taking control of a situation in which you previously had none?

And of course, it's not the child's fault...it's the adults, you know?


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## Almostrecovered (Jul 14, 2011)

well I even said subconsciously because I know I would never try to hurt a child on purpose but I would always be second guessing that I wasn't doing the right thing for the child due to deep rooted anger at the OM or wife


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## sakura (Sep 7, 2011)

That makes sense, actually. I'm interested to see if anyone out there has ever done it...and how it works. If they are successful with it - perhaps able to get past it? I don't know...any successful stories of it out there?


BTW - My perspective is as a recently BW, whose H may have one on the way with his OW who is in a pretty rough position in life as it is, former victim of domestic violence and a single mom as it is...I don't know...seems like it might be the best possible way to handle the whole situation if the baby is his...


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## Almostrecovered (Jul 14, 2011)

I think you will more easily find men who unwittingly raised an OM child
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## tacoma (May 1, 2011)

sakura said:


> That makes sense, actually. I'm interested to see if anyone out there has ever done it.


I`m certain there are a lot of men who have done it.

They just don`t know they`ve done it.


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## morituri (Apr 1, 2011)

The Marriage Builders website has a forum related to children born from an affair.


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## joe kidd (Feb 8, 2011)

Almostrecovered said:


> I think you will more easily find men who unwittingly raised an OM child
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Ugg. I wouldn't even want to think about that.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Hell to the no.

Thank god my Hubs is snipped.


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

There's a guy here who's wife was cheating for over 14 years with OM#3, got pregnant with OM's kid, and he's been raising her for the past 12 years.


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## morituri (Apr 1, 2011)

He's been banned.


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## Whip Morgan (May 26, 2011)

Any word on why 8YR was banned? I think it stemmed from Shamwow's thread.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

that_girl said:


> Hell to the no.


Lol. This is how I feel. I couldn't do it.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## tacoma (May 1, 2011)

He`s been banned a lot.

What`s up with that?


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## CH (May 18, 2010)

No emotional bonds with the child, it's pretty cut and dry. Most guys would run from the wife and child like the plague.

Only those guys who were duped into thinking the child is theirs will stay since they've formed an emotional bond with the child. Not always, but most will.


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## Atholk (Jul 25, 2009)

The non-paternity rate is around 10% in America. So 1 in 10 kids the father is cuckholded.

It's everywhere.


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