# Neighbor subtly (NOT) propositioning my husband



## LeeleyC

Hello!

So I am really at a lose here. I do not know what to do! My husband came to me this morning and told me what happened last night. Every Sunday evening my husband takes our garbage cans out to the curb side for pickup in the morning. Last night, while my husband was doing this very helpful task. 
Our neighbor lady was out as well taking her cans to the curb. My husband had only one can left to bring down and he noticed her from the side of his eye still out front, not paying too much mind he just continued on his way, but as he was dropping the last can off. He looks over at her, and she saw him look at her, and then she preceded to turn her rear towards him and bend over, he again didn't think much of it, but then he noticed something in-between the seat of her pants in the very middle. He thought to himself "oh, how embarrassing, she has something stuck to the bottom of her pants" and as he was trying to figure out what it was, he realized she was wearing crotchless pants!:surprise:
Now mind you, I am very cordial with this woman, we are not overly neighborly, just the normal " hello, how are you? how's the house going " kind of thing, not please try to entice my husband into your "yard". I am so furious! I feel so disrespected. How could another woman do this? Especially to another woman that has just had a baby ( I know I no longer look as good as I might've at one point, maybe). It has taken all I got to not drive home and rip out her jugular and shove it through the hole in her pants! 
Yes, I am very upset. What do I say? If I say anything? I know it is her yard and I am unsure about the laws, but I am pretty sure if she wanted to be naked and watering the garden she could. I had nothing against her before, she would stop and talk to my husband over the fence about our garden ( sometimes she would linger and watch him after he stepped away) but that never bothered me, he is super friendly and charming, and everyone's friend. 
I don't want to cause any neighborhood drama, but I don't want to just sit in the corner while my neighbor makes a break for my husband. I do not think he will do anything, but no one can ever be 100% about that kind of thing. I'm not stupid, just very offended and disrespected. How classless and immoral can someone be? We are a happily married couple with a 7 month old daughter, we have our issues, but not to the point to ever stray. BUT WHAT DO I SAY????I cannot just let it go.:crying::frown2:


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## Bobby5000

Not sure if there was a proposition or a tease. She might have wanted him to proposition her, and then she could pretend to be offended. Whichever this goes, obviously she is disturbed and dysfunctional and get his jollies partially because she is hurting you. 
Your husband was nice enough to tell you and one doubts he has any interest. You should monitor things a little more than usual. 

(P.S. the picture you present in your story does not seem particularly appealing)


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## happy as a clam

I agree with Bobby. She sounds a bit off her rocker and it's doubtful she's much of a threat.

What do you say? Tell her you noticed she split her drawers and offer her a needle and some thread. 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Blondilocks

Tell her she can get panty liners that will take care of that little incontinence problem. She shouldn't be embarrassed as it can happen to a woman at any age. Don't let on that your husband deduced the pants were crotchless.


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## EleGirl

Tell her husband that she is outside showing her bottom with crotchless undies on to the men the neighborhood.

It will not be long before they divorce and you have new neighbors. Just hope you get better neighbors next time.


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## EleGirl

And talk to your husband about him avoiding her at all costs.


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## jld

Next (and every) Sunday walk out with him to take out the trash. Wave a friendly hello to the neighbor lady. Just your presence should take care of any possible issue.


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## Blondilocks

You can also talk to all the other neighborhood wives.


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## She'sStillGotIt

I didn't vote in this poll about what I'd do if this happened to my husband because there wasn't a choice of, "laugh my ass off at this *lunatic* - every single time I saw her - for the rest of my life."

Because that's what I'd do.

Laugh my ass off at her, every single time I happened to see her.


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## badsanta

EleGirl said:


> Tell her husband that she is outside showing her bottom with crotchless undies on to the men the neighborhood.
> 
> It will not be long before they divorce and you have new neighbors. Just hope you get better neighbors next time.


I've seen this story play out in real life. In this situation the offending neighbors were very confident with their sexuality and had an "agreement" with each other that they could each play outside their marriage. It got ugly for the neighbors that wanted to remain monogamous and faithful to each other, and THEY ended up being the ones that had to move after one of the two could no longer resist and ended up sleeping with this neighbor! 

This happened about five years ago, and they have had a very hard time as the housing market hit them very hard when they decided to move and the two of them have never seemed to recover...

Badsanta


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## silex

Moon her back. 

Turnabout is fair play!


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## BetrayedDad

LeeleyC said:


> He thought to himself "oh, how embarrassing, she has something stuck to the bottom of her pants" and as he was trying to figure out what it was, he realized she was wearing crotchless pants!:surprise:


This is ridiculously brazen for a woman... Just to bring some sanity into this conversation.

Is it at all possible maybe she split the seat of her pants and just didn't realize it?!?

I've seen it happen a few times. Especially with khaki like material with no give. 

They bend over, in too tight pants, perhaps like she did and "RIP!" Maybe that's what happened?!?


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## EunuchMonk

Ask husband to video-record it next time around. Blackmail her in whatever way you think fit, just make sure it ain't illegal.


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## john117

Better yet, post the video here


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## jld

Not funny, john.


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## john117

I used to have an affair prone neighbor who thought nothing of mowing her yard in a bikini... Some people and all that...


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## Legend

Have your husband take out the garbage in buttless chaps next time.


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## TAMAT

Take a picture email it to everyone else in the neighborhood.


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## joannacroc

TAMAT said:


> Take a picture email it to everyone else in the neighborhood.


That seems a little Mean Girls. Why stoop to her level?


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## 225985

How old is she?


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## larry.gray

jld said:


> Not funny, john.


Generally when someone says "that's not funny", it is a sign that it is really funny.


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## uhtred

I'm as appreciative of the female form as the next man, but I'm afraid being mooned by a neighbor in crochless panties would just be, well funny. Just too blatant, too , well desperate. OP - imagine if a male neighbor came outside wearing cowboy boots with spurs, a hat and a leather tassles and said "howdy mam, nice day". Would you fined it sexually exciting, or just somewhere between ridiculous and pathetic.


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## larry.gray

I ask what anyone's advice would be for a man complaining about a neighbor waving his willie around.

I suspect most would say to call the police. Advice for a woman should be the same. Incident exposure is indecent exposure regardless of gender.


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## john117

uhtred said:


> I'm as appreciative of the female form as the next man, but I'm afraid being mooned by a neighbor in crochless panties would just be, well funny. Just too blatant, too , well desperate. OP - imagine if a male neighbor came outside wearing cowboy boots with spurs, a hat and a leather tassles and said "howdy mam, nice day". Would you fined it sexually exciting, or just somewhere between ridiculous and pathetic.


Sounds like a perfect avatar picture, certain moderators notwithstanding


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## Blondilocks

It's too bad she didn't get a bee up her bonnet.


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## silex

larry.gray said:


> Generally when someone says "that's not funny", it is a sign that it is really funny.


It's been my experience, having that statement directed at me more times than I can remember, that it usually is a sign that whatever I just said was inappropriate and in very poor taste.


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## john117

silex said:


> It's been my experience, having that statement directed at me more times than I can remember, that it usually is a sign that whatever I just said was inappropriate and in very poor taste.


I resemble that remark


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## MJJEAN

silex said:


> It's been my experience, having that statement directed at me more times than I can remember, that it usually is a sign that whatever I just said was inappropriate and in very poor taste.


Which translates to hilarious if the timing and phrasing were good.


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## jld

larry.gray said:


> Generally when someone says "that's not funny", it is a sign that it is really funny.


I disagree. I don't think taking a video of someone in a compromising position, without their permission, be it a man or woman, and then sharing it, again without their permission, is funny. I think it is exploitative. I don't think exploitation is funny.

Honestly, it reminds me of those stories you hear about people sending around pictures of other people's private parts. But I guess some people find that humorous.


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## jld

silex said:


> It's been my experience, having that statement directed at me more times than I can remember, that it usually is a sign that whatever I just said was inappropriate and in very poor taste.


Totally agree.


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## Blondilocks

Well, the thing is, if someone has the audacity to do what she did, then they most likely have the hide of a rhinoceros when it comes to being embarrassed. She'd probably ask for a copy to add to her collection of stupid stunts.


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## NobodySpecial

john117 said:


> I used to have an affair prone neighbor who thought nothing of mowing her yard in a bikini... Some people and all that...


I have done yard work in my bathing suit. Affair?? Hells no. It is about getting some sun!


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## john117

NobodySpecial said:


> I have done yard work in my bathing suit. Affair?? Hells no. It is about getting some sun!


not with three houses worth of construction workers in full sight . Late 30's and stunning looks incidentally, after three kids, and her husband still cheated with the live in au pair nanny from Latvia that looked like the Michelin Man's twin sister. So she had a revenge affair with one of his mechanics...


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## NobodySpecial

john117 said:


> not with three houses worth of construction workers in full sight


Why not? Seriously. I don't have the right to work on my tan in my yard because there are some guys around? F that.


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## Married but Happy

happy as a clam said:


> She sounds a bit off her rocker and it's doubtful she's much of a threat


I agree. She probably gets a thrill from exhibitionism, and may be a few threads short of a garment, but unless she does more than this, ignore her. Or just tell her husband and leave it at that unless it escalates.


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## jld

john117 said:


> not with three houses worth of construction workers in full sight . Late 30's and stunning looks incidentally, after three kids, and her husband still cheated with the live in au pair nanny from Latvia that looked like the Michelin Man's twin sister. So she had a revenge affair with one of his mechanics...


They may not have been meeting each other's emotional needs.

How do you know about their affairs, btw?


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## larry.gray

jld said:


> I disagree. I don't think taking a video of someone in a compromising position, without their permission, be it a man or woman, and then sharing it, again without their permission, is funny. I think it is exploitative. I don't think exploitation is funny.


You are failing to recognize that it is satire. It was never intended as serious advice. It was always just a joke.

I am sure you remember my previous suggestions that you may be on the Spectrum. Perhaps you should consider why you are unable to recognize satire when others did so easily.



jld said:


> Honestly, it reminds me of those stories you hear about people sending around pictures of other people's private parts. But I guess some people find that humorous.


It was never serious advice, never the less, that is a false equivalency. The moral and legal reasons why spreading private pictures around it's based on an expectation of privacy. You have an expectation of privacy in a public restroom, or your own home behind drawn curtains. You do not have an expectation a privacy at the edge of your property line.


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## NobodySpecial

Where on earth does one even get crotchless pants? Or did she rip them? Kinda bizarre.


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## jld

larry.gray said:


> You are failing to recognize that it is satire. It was never intended as serious advice. It was always just a joke.
> 
> I am sure you remember my previous suggestions that you may be on the Spectrum. Perhaps you should consider why you are unable to recognize satire when others did so easily.


I think some men here may very much have enjoyed seeing such a video. I did not think the suggestion was funny, and said so. 



> It was never serious advice, never the less, that is a false equivalency. The moral and legal reasons why spreading private pictures around it's based on an expectation of privacy. You have an expectation of privacy in a public restroom, or your own home behind drawn curtains. You do not have an expectation a privacy at the edge of your property line.


I still think it is tasteless.


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## NextTimeAround

NobodySpecial said:


> Where on earth does one even get crotchless pants? Or did she rip them? Kinda bizarre.


Frederick's of Hollywood, if they still exist.

In London, there's a store in SOHO called Ann Summers.....


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## NextTimeAround

My feeling about these situations is that this woman probably knows what she is doing. Which might also mean that she knows what her rights are and may know how to get people in stitches. 

Imagine her getting inside your house........


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## EunuchMonk

larry.gray said:


> It was never serious advice, never the less, that is a false equivalency. The moral and legal reasons why spreading private pictures around it's based on an expectation of privacy. You have an expectation of privacy in a public restroom, or your own home behind drawn curtains. *You do not have an expectation a privacy at the edge of your property line.*


Yep. This.

Wonder where OP is with the update? Hope she didn't go to jail for ripping out a jugular.


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## EunuchMonk

jld said:


> I think some men here may very much have enjoyed seeing such a video.


Point out said men.


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## jld

EunuchMonk said:


> Point out said men.


They know who they are.


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## john117

NobodySpecial said:


> Why not? Seriously. I don't have the right to work on my tan in my yard because there are some guys around? F that.


OSHA disagrees with you  think of the occupational hazards of power tools!


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## NobodySpecial

john117 said:


> OSHA disagrees with you  think of the occupational hazards of power tools!


I will make sure to wear my burka when in my yard at all times.


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## john117

jld said:


> They may not have been meeting each other's emotional needs.
> 
> How do you know about their affairs, btw?


She had three kids, an older one DD1's age and classmate, and twins from current husband. Her older kid spilled the beans to DD1. I'll write the story one day, very funny and tragic at the same time.


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## john117

jld said:


> They know who they are.


Wrong pet type


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## john117

NobodySpecial said:


> I will make sure to wear my burka when in my yard at all times.


That's my OTHER neighbors, affectionately called "the Bin Laden's" by my kids... We live next door and don't know what they look like. No kidding.


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## NextTimeAround

john117 said:


> OSHA disagrees with you  think of the occupational hazards of power tools!


Here's a song ....and video for you and Nobody Special

"Benny Benassi - Satisfaction"


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## EunuchMonk

The Bin Ladens...










Where do they come up with it.


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## Yeswecan

Exhibitionism is alive and well in that neighborhood. If I saw my neighbor bending over with crotchless whatevers I would ignore it. Quickest why to convey you are not interested is to convey nothing at all.


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## john117

EunuchMonk said:


> The Bin Ladens...
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Where do they come up with it.


My kids are BRUTAL... The neighbors are from that part of the world, and are very reclusive. All outside yard work is contracted out, and they literally are never out. Once I saw his or her parents from the old country, that's all. The house sports closed curtains 24/7 and a pair of satellite dishes...


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## Good Guy

That's about as much of a turn on as mouldy bread. Ugh.

IF it happens again, your husband should say something about it, but in a way that makes it clear that he thinks it's some kind of accident, since no decent woman would EVER do something so gross. That's what I'd do.


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## Blondilocks

The woman bent over deliberately to show her assets. She was not a victim of an apparel malfunction. She is an exhibitionist and as such can expect to take flack for her behavior. 

As for the neighbors who keep the curtains closed - many darker skin women like to keep out of the sun because they don't want to get any darker.


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## EleGirl

=


NobodySpecial said:


> Where on earth does one even get crotchless pants? Or did she rip them? Kinda bizarre.


Why on amazon.com of course!!!

Go there and search for “crotchless pants”. You will get that and a lot more ‘playful’ undergarments.

I’d post a link to the results, but then I would probably have to ban myself. Don’t feel like doing that today. >


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## Blondilocks

I'll have to take a look. Crotchless panties have been around forever. Personally, I've never seen a pair of pants that were made that way.


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## NobodySpecial

EleGirl said:


> =
> 
> 
> Why on amazon.com of course!!!
> 
> Go there and search for “crotchless pants”. You will get that and a lot more ‘playful’ undergarments.
> 
> I’d post a link to the results, but then I would probably have to ban myself. Don’t feel like doing that today. >


I knew that there were UNDER garments. But she was outdoors. I was assuming that we were talking about actual pants.


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## EleGirl

larry.gray said:


> You are failing to recognize that it is satire. It was never intended as serious advice. It was always just a joke.
> 
> *I am sure you remember my previous suggestions that you may be on the Spectrum. Perhaps you should consider why you are unable to recognize satire when others did so easily.*
> 
> 
> 
> It was never serious advice, never the less, that is a false equivalency. The moral and legal reasons why spreading private pictures around it's based on an expectation of privacy. You have an expectation of privacy in a public restroom, or your own home behind drawn curtains. You do not have an expectation a privacy at the edge of your property line.


And perhaps you might want to consider that you may have an issue with a need to attack at least some posters for stating their personal view. 


You might want to consider using the blocking function if someone bothers you to the point of a personal attack on them. This time it’s a warning.



{speaking as a moderator.}


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## EleGirl

NobodySpecial said:


> I knew that there were UNDER garments. But she was outdoors. I was assuming that we were talking about actual pants.


Do a google search on “crochless jeans” though they look more home made….


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## john117

NobodySpecial said:


> I knew that there were UNDER garments. But she was outdoors. I was assuming that we were talking about actual pants.


Nothing that a quality set of optics can't discern 

Back in the old country we all lived in apartments with balconies. A rather good looking lady used to do everything in her balcony wearing a baby doll and fuzzy slippers... 

Some people are like that, nothing more, nothing less. Is it inappropriate? Yea, tough...


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## ILoveSparkles

*He looks over at her, and she saw him look at her, and then she preceded to turn her rear towards him and bend over, he again didn't think much of it, but then he noticed something in-between the seat of her pants in the very middle. He thought to himself "oh, how embarrassing, she has something stuck to the bottom of her pants" and as he was trying to figure out what it was, he realized she was wearing crotchless pants!*

If I were you, I'd be pissed at my husband not the neighbor. He noticed something. He looked at her ass long enough to "to try to figure out what it was" If he thought she had something stuck to the bottom of her pants, then he should have continued with the trash cans. He stared at her long enough to realize his original assumption was incorrect.


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## Blondilocks

She would have been sol with my husband. Not only was he quite near-sighted without his glasses, he had no mouth filter. He would have yelled over 'hey, you've got something stuck on your ass. just thought you'd want to know."


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## mistakesweremade

Yes said:


> *He looks over at her, and she saw him look at her, and then she preceded to turn her rear towards him and bend over, he again didn't think much of it, but then he noticed something in-between the seat of her pants in the very middle. He thought to himself "oh, how embarrassing, she has something stuck to the bottom of her pants" and as he was trying to figure out what it was, he realized she was wearing crotchless pants!*
> 
> If I were you, I'd be pissed at my husband not the neighbor. He noticed something. He looked at her ass long enough to "to try to figure out what it was" If he thought she had something stuck to the bottom of her pants, then he should have continued with the trash cans. He stared at her long enough to realize his original assumption was incorrect.


Disagree. Her husband clearly has no ill intentions as he was upfront about the whole thing. The whole discovery of the pants being crotchless could have been mere seconds. 

Oh what's that on her....oh.... Not like he had to investigate for even a minute or two.


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## Yeswecan

EleGirl said:


> =
> 
> 
> Why on amazon.com of course!!!
> 
> Go there and search for “crotchless pants”. You will get that and a lot more ‘playful’ undergarments.
> 
> I’d post a link to the results, but then I would probably have to ban myself. Don’t feel like doing that today. >


Amazon has everything...I mean everything....

Prime Member myself. :laugh:


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## Yeswecan

Yes said:


> *He looks over at her, and she saw him look at her, and then she preceded to turn her rear towards him and bend over, he again didn't think much of it, but then he noticed something in-between the seat of her pants in the very middle. He thought to himself "oh, how embarrassing, she has something stuck to the bottom of her pants" and as he was trying to figure out what it was, he realized she was wearing crotchless pants!*
> 
> If I were you, I'd be pissed at my husband not the neighbor. He noticed something. He looked at her ass long enough to "to try to figure out what it was" If he thought she had something stuck to the bottom of her pants, then he should have continued with the trash cans. He stared at her long enough to realize his original assumption was incorrect.


The H is observant. He should be beaten about the head and neck as a result? Horse blinders are for horses.


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## Faithful Wife

Crotchless PANTS? :wtf:


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## EleGirl

larry.gray said:


> It's only an attack if it is denegration of a person. When you look at it as the natural variation in humans and the intent is to improve understanding and not more thaen it is not.
> 
> 
> 
> The block function does not work. I've posted this before; and again recently. I would use it if it made a poster dissapear, but it does not.
> 
> 
> 
> Perhaps this should be via PM? My inbox is not full...
> 
> But since you made it public, I did too.


Even if the block function is not working for you, I am sure that you have an ability to ignore a post.

I made it public because your rather rude post to her was public. I chose that instead of a ban. Oh well.


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## bandit.45

What I think is gross is... what if a neighborhood kid was passing by and saw that? 

She ought to have the cops called on her for indecent exposure.


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## MattMatt

Incidentally, crotchless panties are recommended for some medical conditions so are not always worn for sexual reasons.


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## EunuchMonk

Blondilocks said:


> She would have been sol with my husband. Not only was he quite near-sighted without his glasses, he had no mouth filter. He would have yelled over *'hey, you've got something stuck on your ass. just thought you'd want to know."*


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## SimplyAmorous

I find the scenario rather amusing.. if this happened to my husband.. well I KNOW he would be looking.. he'd also come in & tell me.. I am pretty sure I would find this crazily interesting -learning more about what makes the neighbor lady tick & what she is after.. 

I think we'd both have a little fun keeping an eye on her to see how she tries to entice the neighborhood men.. she wouldn't catch my husband , however... he wouldn't be allured by a woman of this character -if this really did happen as he was thinking it did.. that in itself could be very suspect.. (I mean come on, a lot of men have their minds in the gutter & could have misinterpreted) ..She may be completely innocent.. if not.. more "enticement" is sure to come.

This reminds me of a story my mother told me....I guess when I was very little (I vaguely remember this woman but have seen pictures of her)...she had a friend (she liked the woman too), a neighbor lady who used to try to get the neighborhood men's attention by walking around in a skimpy bathing suit strutting her stuff... my mother always said she had a thing for my father, it was just obvious...

But what this neighbor lady didn't know was... how my father looked upon her behavior.. that my mother got an ear full behind the scenes... he was just not impressed... She said he went out of his way to *ignore her *when she was trying to get his attention.


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## SimplyAmorous

I would vote *ignore it* - unless you don't trust your husband.. (then there could be issues)..

I can't even imagine Vote #3 -"*talking to the neighbor about it*".. which seems to have the most votes.. Hmmm love to be a fly on the wall with THAT conversation !!


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## john117

The sanitation department begs to ask if this is an isolated incident or a common occurrence. Response would be drastically different.


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## Married but Happy

Faithful Wife said:


> Crotchless PANTS? :wtf:


Easily made from yoga pants or leggings with a pair of scissors. I remember my wife making them when we lived up north one cold winter, living in an old farmhouse with an unheated bedroom. Anything to preserve our sex life ...


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## Faithful Wife

Married but Happy said:


> Easily made from yoga pants or leggings with a pair of scissors. I remember my wife making them when we lived up north one cold winter, living in an old farmhouse with an unheated bedroom. Anything to preserve our sex life ...


THAT makes sense, but walking around in your yard in home made crotchless pants?


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## silex

Maybe they weren't crotchless, maybe they were see through and she's got a really hairy bush.


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## jld

Faithful Wife said:


> THAT makes sense, but walking around in your yard in home made crotchless pants?


It was at night, and he didn't mention that anyone else was out. It wasn't like she was flashing the whole neighborhood in broad daylight.

Not that that makes it right in any way, of course. It wasn't, and it doesn't.


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## silex

How did he see this at night?

Starting to not make all that much sense.


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## Married but Happy

silex said:


> How did he see this at night?


Street light? Flashlight? Night vision goggles?


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## Faithful Wife

jld said:


> It was at night, and he didn't mention that anyone else was out. It wasn't like she was flashing the whole neighborhood in broad daylight.
> 
> Not that that makes it right in any way, of course. It wasn't, and it doesn't.


I'm just confused about the crotchless pants themselves. This is not something you can just buy. So if she cut the crotch out of some pants just to flash people....that's just bizarre!

If she was wearing a short skirt and pulled a Sharon Stone on him, sure, that would make sense.

But crotchless pants in themselves don't make any sense. :scratchhead:


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## uhtred

Could it have been an accidental wardrobe malfunction? She was tired, not thinking etc Threw something on an really didn't think.


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## jld

Faithful Wife said:


> I'm just confused about the crotchless pants themselves. This is not something you can just buy. So if she cut the crotch out of some pants just to flash people....that's just bizarre!
> 
> If she was wearing a short skirt and pulled a Sharon Stone on him, sure, that would make sense.
> 
> But crotchless pants in themselves don't make any sense. :scratchhead:


I may have seen them sold in India. Women there often wear pants with long tunics. In that case, an opening would not really matter. Might even be convenient with those squat toilets that are so common.

Just a thought. Otherwise I don't know, either.


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## Middle of Everything

This thread is awesome. 

Crotchless pants being discussed to the point of analyzing why she may have had them on outside and where she purchased them.

What I like about TAM when the Us vs them, male vs female sh!t gets to be too much.


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## john117

Middle of Everything said:


> This thread is awesome.
> 
> Crotchless pants being discussed to the point of analyzing why she may have had them on outside and where she purchased them.
> 
> What I like about TAM when the Us vs them, male vs female sh!t gets to be too much.


Maybe a bad case of rash...


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## Faithful Wife

jld said:


> I may have seen them sold in India. Women there often wear pants with long tunics. In that case, an opening would not really matter. Might even be convenient with those squat toilets that are so common.
> 
> Just a thought. Otherwise I don't know, either.


Interesting thought.

The only thing I could come up with resembling crotchless pants would be chaps.

Or there was this movie in the early 80's....I actually wanted a pair....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=io53QMwHZ48


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