# Bang! Bang! Affair Over.



## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/4204102/husband-shoots-his-wife-and-her-lover-dead-in-their-family-home-in-colombia-after-catching-the-pair-having-sex/


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## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

I can understand it is a crime of passion, but the poor kids will be left parentless, he should have just photographed them and divorced her.


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## NextTimeAround (Dec 15, 2011)

aine said:


> I can understand it is a crime of passion, but the poor kids will be left parentless, he should have just photographed them and divorced her.


I think crimes of passion in many Latin American countries was legal at one time - when it's the husband murdering his wife's lover......... not the reverse.


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## SlowlyGoingCrazy (Jun 2, 2011)

Not a crime of passion. 2 counts of first degree murder. He planned to go and catch her with a gun. 

She "sullied my honour as a man". There is nothing honourable about what he did. Cheating does not warrant the death penalty.


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

Am I the only person who thinks he planned to catch them in the act and shoot them?


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## Taxman (Dec 21, 2016)

More than likely he planned this. Something in the back of my mind, that many countries stayed within the "Napoleonic code", which allowed a betrayed spouse to end the life of their wayward partner. This I believe referred to men finding their wives in "flagrante delicto", and ending their lives on the spot.


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## Dannip (Jun 13, 2017)

Seems all are victims and are guilty all around.


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## StillSearching (Feb 8, 2013)

Well great....now he's gunna be someones unwilling girlfriend.


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## TDSC60 (Dec 8, 2011)

True story.
I know a young man in the military stationed at a base in New Mexico. He had early duty so he went to bed leaving his wife and a coworker together in the den "working" on something for a job. He woke up thirsty around 2 AM and as he was walking to the kitchen for water he caught his wife and the coworker in the other bedroom having sex. He escorted the OM through the front doors sans clothing and told his wife to get out. She freaked out and called the cops, thinking that the cops would haul him away as a threat to her. After hearing what happened, the officers asked her to leave the house and asked the man if he had a gun. He did. They told him if he had shot them both in the bed no charges would have been filed. Evidently in that State it is legal to kill your wife and her OM if they are found going at it in your house. 60 days latter the divorce was final.

This is what I heard first hand from the mouth of the guy involved. He was shocked as was I by the police officers statement.


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

No, IMHO he is a murderer, they are victims. This isn't the middle ages. People may object to or be offended by adultery, but its not a crime punishable by death. 

He has every right to divorce her and have his lawyers take her for everything she has. 



Dannip said:


> Seems all are victims and are guilty all around.


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## Middle of Everything (Feb 19, 2012)

"Hey Joe, where ya goin with that gun in your hand?"

Pretty good Hendrix song.


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## TAMAT (Jun 20, 2015)

Well it's punishable by death in Saudi Arabia, and was a crime in almost every state in the US with different combinations of Jail Time and fines. Given that the disruption to the social fabric of a society is so great from Adultery there may have been wisdom in those approaches we have forgotten as modernity has marched on. 

I would not convict that man if I were on the jury. Although for myself I would never have shot the wife.

Tamat


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

I can totally understand the pain and hurt and shock that would cause this sort of action. Most of us wouldnt kill anyone, but we may feel like doing it.


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## theDrifter (Mar 20, 2017)

Hard to tell if he has been officially charged yet - it leads me to believe he hasn't. Whatever he is eventually charged with will tell the tale as to how the community where he lives sees infidelity. He could just get a slap on the wrist or they could throw the book at him. 

It's also up to the jury. In many areas of the USA he would be charged with Voluntary Manslaughter or less in order to get a conviction. One thing I do know, if I was a member of the jury I would never vote to convict this man.


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## Dannip (Jun 13, 2017)

uhtred said:


> No, IMHO he is a murderer, they are victims. This isn't the middle ages. People may object to or be offended by adultery, but its not a crime punishable by death.
> 
> He has every right to divorce her and have his lawyers take her for everything she has.


Didn't state levels of guilt or innocence nor punishments. All are guilty. All are victims. How is that not right. 

Murder ain't right. No matter what. Cheating too. 

Willing to bet if she didn't cheat, his unstable ass would not have done this. She should have left him and not cheat. She likely saw he was off. Clearly he was. Will also bet he'd go after her if she tried to divorce though. 

The actions of both achieved nothing of value.


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## TAMAT (Jun 20, 2015)

However we sometimes get things backwards, it's not that the person was off and as a result his wife cheated, it more likely he went off after years of suspected cheating on his wife's part. This is particularly true where the betrayed spouse keeps quiet about the affairs and the wayward spouse gaslights the betrayed spouse. 

My brother in law is an example, he thinks my FIL was justified to cheat on my MIL because my MIL is so difficult, but my MIL was an accomplished, intelligent and together person before my FILs callousness and unending lies destroyed her. 

Tamat


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

Against the law in 21 states, most of them its a minor crime https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adultery#United_States





TAMAT said:


> Well it's punishable by death in Saudi Arabia, and was a crime in almost every state in the US with different combinations of Jail Time and fines. Given that the disruption to the social fabric of a society is so great from Adultery there may have been wisdom in those approaches we have forgotten as modernity has marched on.
> 
> I would not convict that man if I were on the jury. Although for myself I would never have shot the wife.
> 
> Tamat


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

Interesting. I'd have no trouble convicting him for murder. Even if adultery were a serious crime, vigilante justice is not OK. Since its only a minor crime, killing someone for it is clearly murder.






theDrifter said:


> Hard to tell if he has been officially charged yet - it leads me to believe he hasn't. Whatever he is eventually charged with will tell the tale as to how the community where he lives sees infidelity. He could just get a slap on the wrist or they could throw the book at him.
> 
> It's also up to the jury. In many areas of the USA he would be charged with Voluntary Manslaughter or less in order to get a conviction. One thing I do know, if I was a member of the jury I would never vote to convict this man.


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## Dyokemm (Apr 24, 2013)

Adultery should not be a death sentence (well, as long as the WS isn't plotting with their AP to get rid of the BS.....which occasionally happens.....in that case screw them)....

But, that incontrovertible fact stated.....

DON'T SCREW WITH ANOTHER MAN'S WIFE....

You better be aware that there is a distinct possibility you could end up like this pair.

And while I would never wish harm on anyone.....it is hard to have too much sympathy.

A traitor and an interloper.....working hand in hand to destroy another man's life and three children's home and family.

Not deserving of death....but certainly not innocent victims either.


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## The Middleman (Apr 30, 2012)

I think that if you're banging someone else's husband/wife, you should at least think that there is some risk that you're going to get seriously hurt, if not killed, by that person's SO. Common sense.


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## Popcorn2015 (Sep 10, 2015)

FYI, OP's link has pictures that are borderline NSFW. Pixellated but still fairly graphic.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

The pictures are over the top. What a waste.


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Yeah the Sun has never been afraid to throw out provocative photos.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

I feel sympathy for the shooter and the kids. I wouldn't call him a murderer - for me for one to murder, the victim must be innocent. But that's just how I'm wired.

He's just a guy who lost it seeing his wife getting fked by another man, his reaction isn't exactly surprising.


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## SlowlyGoingCrazy (Jun 2, 2011)

He planned to catch them, it wasn't like he just happened to come home. 

If affairs = the death penalty then any other marriage ending action should too. Husband acts like an ass? Shoot him, and the stupid friend he drinks with too much. 

Cheating is one of many behaviors that end or hurt a marriage. It does not justify murder. 

As for the jury, their job isn't to judge morals. They look at facts and decide if what he did was against the law as it is written. That's all. 
They will specifically tell you that your personal feelings mean nothing. 

If a guy shoots the drug dealing on the street cause he wants to clean up the neighbourhood, he will get charged even if you don't like drug dealers.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

He planned to catch them, but not so certain he planned to kill them.


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## Jasel (Jan 8, 2013)

Hope their kids never see those pictures. Yikes.

(1500th post  )


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

Some men best not be cheated on. 

Now, I do not approve of what he did. But, I do understand. 
.............................................................................................

A better solution.....for him.

He should have beat the hell out of both of them. Then again, looking at the picture, her lover was no little guy....... Baseball bat time.

Two years in jail, beats a lifetime in prison.
.............................................................................................

A women not to cross?
Lorena Bobbitt comes to mind with respect to a pissed off women.


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## SlowlyGoingCrazy (Jun 2, 2011)

Doesn't sound like this guy would have been a good husband to begin with. It's horrible for his poor children. 
The amount of people justifying murdering a Mother is shocking. 

Cheating is not death penalty worthy. Period.


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## RWB (Feb 6, 2010)

Middle of Everything said:


> "Hey Joe, where ya goin with that gun in your hand?"
> 
> Pretty good Hendrix song.


"I'm going down to shoot my old lady, she was caught messing around with another man." 

"That ain't too cool."

"And I gave her the gun."

Murder ain't right, but...


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## Handy (Jul 23, 2017)

Cheating is not death penalty worthy


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

Handy said:


> Cheating is not death penalty worthy


 Except that adultery can and does lead to those cheated on suffering tremendously, and it can lead to them getting severely depressed, having break downs and even to suicide.


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## naiveonedave (Jan 9, 2014)

while cheating is not worthy of murder, crimes of passion can be temporary insanity. I really think the devastation caused by infidelity really mucks with the BS's psyche enough to change a large fraction of them to do things like kill others? PTSD is a serious mental condition....

I always wondered if the murder/suicides of an older couple is because one found out the other cheated. I wonder if infidelity is one of the leading causes of murdering one's spouse?


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

And he has orphaned his own children.

Still, what does that matter when set against his "honour"?


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

naiveonedave said:


> while cheating is not worthy of murder, crimes of passion can be temporary insanity. I really think the devastation caused by infidelity really mucks with the BS's psyche enough to change a large fraction of them to do things like kill others? PTSD is a serious mental condition....
> 
> I always wondered if the murder/suicides of an older couple is because one found out the other cheated. I wonder if infidelity is one of the leading causes of murdering one's spouse?


I watch quite a few programmes about real life murders. So many of them are related to cheating, deception and lying. Almost all of husband/wife murders are connected to one of them cheating.


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## MyRevelation (Apr 12, 2016)

There are still places here in the USA where officials will unofficially justify such actions as "he needed killin". In my own county, I'm not sure this man would even be indicted, much less convicted ... maybe because he used deadly force, but I pretty much guarantee there would be no indictment if he had just beat the hell out of them.

As far as I'm concerned, when you engage in an activity where there is a reasonable chance of bodily harm, you are not a victim. Actions have consequences and certain actions have potentially very bad consequences.


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

RandomDude said:


> I feel sympathy for the shooter and the kids. I wouldn't call him a murderer - *for me for one to murder, the victim must be innocent*. But that's just how I'm wired.
> 
> He's just a guy who lost it seeing his wife getting fked by another man, his reaction isn't exactly surprising.


Everyone is guilty of something, so anyone can kill anyone. Got it.

Seriously, I can see that he might have lost it, but if he knew or suspected the affair, then his actions were probably premeditated. At best, it's manslaughter, at worst, it's first degree murder.


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## Cynthia (Jan 31, 2014)

MattMatt said:


> And he has orphaned his own children.
> 
> Still, what does that matter when set against his "honour"?


Not only that, but they will likely be raised by his wife's family and the children will be taught that their mother was a "good person" while their father is a murderer. He'll probably never see his children again. They will be raised in the same family as his adulterous wife and he will rot in jail. What an idiot.

If the death penalty is appropriate for adultery, it should be after a jury trial, not something that is carried out by an angry spouse. I'm not saying that I think there should be a death penalty for adultery, I don't. But if something is a crime, it should be taken through the courts not carried out by an angry person in the heat of the moment.


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

I can't agree. For civilization to work we need people to be able to control themselves and not engage in violence except in the immediate defense of others.

Its just too easy for an angry person to do too much damage. 




naiveonedave said:


> while cheating is not worthy of murder, crimes of passion can be temporary insanity. I really think the devastation caused by infidelity really mucks with the BS's psyche enough to change a large fraction of them to do things like kill others? PTSD is a serious mental condition....
> 
> I always wondered if the murder/suicides of an older couple is because one found out the other cheated. I wonder if infidelity is one of the leading causes of murdering one's spouse?


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## naiveonedave (Jan 9, 2014)

uhtred said:


> I can't agree. For civilization to work we need people to be able to control themselves and not engage in violence except in the immediate defense of others.
> 
> Its just too easy for an angry person to do too much damage.


Never said it was ok, it clearly is not. But if you are a cheater and get whacked, you should have seen it as a reasonable outcome/possibility. Not right, but not totally unrealistic, either.

I think you think too highly of people in general. The damage inflicted from mental trauma like infidelity, can have severe consequences. Rage, depression, the whole gamut.


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## SlowlyGoingCrazy (Jun 2, 2011)

There was a lot of crap my ex did that caused as much rage as his affair. 
If affair is murder-worthy then you have to include *all* the other things that hurt your spouse.


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

naiveonedave said:


> Never said it was ok, it clearly is not. But if you are a cheater and get whacked, you should have seen it as a reasonable outcome/possibility. Not right, but not totally unrealistic, either.


Far more people die in auto accidents, and this is known. Should you cower in your home? The odds of getting whacked for cheating are far, far lower, so it's UNreasonable to think of it as a _reasonable _outcome. Unless you know the BS is a sociopath or psychopath ....


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## naiveonedave (Jan 9, 2014)

Married but Happy said:


> Far more people die in auto accidents, and this is known. Should you cower in your home? The odds of getting whacked for cheating are far, far lower, so it's UNreasonable to think of it as a _reasonable _outcome. Unless you know the BS is a sociopath or psychopath ....


nice false equivalency. Murder in any form is less likely.

I look at it this way, if I walk down the bad neighborhood at night and get mugged, though mugging is wrong, I should have seen it as a possible outcome. Mugger is a mugger, murderer still a murderer.


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

naiveonedave said:


> nice false equivalency. Murder in any form is less likely.
> 
> I look at it this way, if I walk down the bad neighborhood at night and get mugged, though mugging is wrong, I should have seen it as a possible outcome. Mugger is a mugger, murderer still a murderer.


Thanks. I worked hard on that one!

But if you're speeding, then you're doing something wrong and should see an accident and death as a possibility. But, I think few people think of that possibility. In terms of relative risk, being the OM/OW is relatively low risk compared to most risks in life.

As for the mugging scenario - it also applies to some rape scenarios. Sure, there's a risk in certain situations, but do we blame the victim? Or do we - correctly - blame the perpetrator?

Anyway, murder is clearly wrong, unless it is in self-defense. (I also think killing is _usually_ wrong in defense of your property, unless you are at risk. Things can be replaced - life cannot.)


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## naiveonedave (Jan 9, 2014)

Married but Happy said:


> Thanks. I worked hard on that one!
> 
> But if you're speeding, then you're doing something wrong and should see an accident and death as a possibility. But, I think few people think of that possibility. In terms of relative risk, being the OM/OW is relatively low risk compared to most risks in life.
> 
> ...


As I have stated repeatedly. The murderer is wrong and is more wrong than the cheater. I actually think that in some cases the victim needs to really look in the mirror and see that they were foolish and taking a much higher risk than they thought. Dance will the devil and all that.

Also, in infidelity, the risk is really getting caught. I would wager that the probability of getting murdered goes way up when you are caught as a WS or OM/OW, especially if caught red handed. Watch the show Cheaters for one episode and you will see what I mean. Doesn't make it right, but it is what it is.


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## Handy (Jul 23, 2017)

*Diana7
Except that adultery can and does lead to those cheated on suffering tremendously, and it can lead to them getting severely depressed, having break downs and even to suicide.*

I say the idea of it being OK to kill a cheater is mostly the result of accepted cultural norms and beliefs. In the 1950's it was normal for couples that were Roman Catholic to say they would kill their spouse if caught cheating but divorce was UNTHINKABLE."

Now if someone said that same thing most people would say they stepped over the line.

My opinion is if my spouse cheats on me, means she isn't loyal OR on the outside something is missing in "OUR" relationship OR something is wrong or missing in her life.

If people have sex with someone other than their SO, their bits are still the same, just like if they had sex with their own SO. Physically nothing changed genital wise. There could be a STI. 

The main problem is, can the cheating spouse be trusted. Killing someone you do not trust is not acceptable to me. I wish society would consider the fact that people have flaws and sometimes do hurtful things that affect people close to them.

People dating in non-exclusive relationships have sex with different people. Just because a person is married doesn't eliminate the attraction one person might have for someone else. On paper it should eliminate all others but people are not computer programs. Not all people follow a computer like program such as "if the answer/status is "X", then the answer is no. If the answer/status is "y" then proceed to the next step. BTW I am not a programmer.


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## Rubix Cubed (Feb 21, 2016)

It seems the majority of cheaters suffer little consequence for their actions . In this case they obviously suffered more consequences than their actions deserved. Law of balances?


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## Harken Banks (Jun 12, 2012)

I never struck or inflicted violence on my wife. That same cannot be said for her. There was a time I would have gone after her affair partner with all abandon. Not a gun though. I just wanted to beat the **** out of him and watch him cry. Destroyed my family. It is hard not to have a visceral reaction.


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## Clay2013 (Oct 30, 2013)

Sorry but I think they both got what they deserved.

Don't play with fire if you don't want to be burned.


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## Harken Banks (Jun 12, 2012)

Gordon Lightfoot, Sundown. He later said about the song that was not a good point in his life. People interested in this topic should read Dig's threads. He took it out on a heavy bag in his garage. They reconciled. I talked to him a few times. He is a smart and thoughtful guy. The rage is natural and best controlled and directed in a way that does not involve death or jail. The guy whom he thought to be a friend and was doing whatever with his wife lost his career and reputation. Pretty much everything, I would think. My wife's affair partner also lost his job. Sad sacks both of them now.


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti (Apr 23, 2017)

Handy said:


> *Diana7
> 
> My opinion is if my spouse cheats on me, means she isn't loyal OR on the outside something is missing in "OUR" relationship OR something is wrong or missing in her life.*


*
Oh for petes sake! We all have something missing in our lives or in "OUR" relationships! Egad, man, that doesn't in any way, shape or form justify cheating! Once the promise is made, it must be kept. It's called integrity. A very simple concept. If something is amiss, you work on fixing it...together. If that fails, end the relationship honestly.

If something being missing was grounds for cheating, there would never be any reason for any level of commitment between two people. 




Handy said:



Just because a person is married doesn't eliminate the attraction one person might have for someone else. 

Click to expand...


But it does dictate how they should react to and deal with that attraction.




Handy said:



 On paper it should eliminate all others but people are not computer programs. Not all people follow a computer like program such as "if the answer/status is "X", then the answer is no. 

Click to expand...


No we're not. Just as we're not animals, slave to our instincts. We are are rational, thinking beings with the power of free will. We are not purely at the mercy of our instincts, desires, or any "programming" we may have been born with.*


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## 10th Engineer Harrison (Dec 11, 2013)

Rocky Mountain Yeti said:


> Oh for petes sake! We all have _something _missing in our lives or in "OUR" relationships! Egad, man, that doesn't in any way, shape or form justify cheating! Once the promise is made, it must be kept. It's called integrity. A very simple concept. If something is amiss, you work on fixing it...together. If that fails, end the relationship honestly.
> 
> If something being missing was grounds for cheating, there would never be any reason for any level of commitment between two people.
> 
> ...


Mostly incorrect. Humans are animals. We're not plants, after all. As such we do have instincts. Most people are rational, though our current president clearly shows that not all people are. Free will? What's that?

-10th Engineer Harrison


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

Diana7 said:


> Except that adultery can and does lead to those cheated on suffering tremendously, and it can lead to them getting severely depressed, having break downs and even to suicide.


All right.

Explain yourself.

Is blowing both of them "away" justified in this case?

Can his suffering mind and deep depression be considered as 'sufficient' mitigating circumstances?


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## Dyokemm (Apr 24, 2013)

Yes....we humans are animals.....

But animals with the capacity to think and exercise our will against our instincts.

We are not just slaves to instinctual urges.


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## TaDor (Dec 20, 2015)

Dyokemm said:


> Yes....we humans are animals.....
> 
> But animals with the capacity to think and exercise our will against our instincts.
> 
> We are not just slaves to instinctual urges.


Plenty of proof that we are not.


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## Handy (Jul 23, 2017)

I see no reason to shoot any person in an affair.

One study said 10% of kids were not fathered by the husband. This 10% does not include adopted kids.

With paternity test done in in DNA labs the percentage is much higher.

_Genetic testing companies report that almost one-third of the time, samples sent to them show that the man is not father to the child. But these companies are used when there’s a court order in a paternity suit or when a man gets suspicious because his kid looks a lot like his best friend or his wife’s coworker. So we shouldn’t be surprised that the non-paternity rate for these tests hovers around 30 percent._

With so much fooling around, if every cheater was shot, I would buy stock in a funeral company. Then who would pay for all of the parent-less children? People F888 up. Deal with it. 

Dump the cheater ASAP. It is better than going to jail and you do not have to live with guilt when you mellow out by the time you collect social security or your pension. Being in jail doesn't pay so well and doesn't add anything to your retirement fund.


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti (Apr 23, 2017)

10th Engineer Harrison said:


> Mostly incorrect. Humans are animals. We're not plants, after all. As such we do have instincts. Most people are rational, though our current president clearly shows that not all people are. Free will? What's that?
> 
> -10th Engineer Harrison


All perfectly correct.
I didn't say we aren't animal, I said we aren't JUST animals. Big difference. Sentience and rational thought are crucial differences in determining the level of control we have over our animal nature.

Likewise, yrs we do have instincts, but as humans, we have the ability to rise above them. Any statement to the contrary is a pathetic attempt to rationalize bad behavior.

But I can see why you might think we can't rise above our base instincts since you can't seem to rise above your uncontrollable urge to turn something completely unrelated into a political rant.


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## Dyokemm (Apr 24, 2013)

TaDor said:


> Plenty of proof that we are not.


Also plenty of proof we are......

For all of our faults.....humans HAVE made progress......obvious in the material aspects of life and in our scientific understanding of the natural world.....

But also in morality and ethics as well.....though the pace is often glacial.....and of course there are also plenty of examples that would suggest the contrary....

In spite of that though.....this ain't the Iron Age or even the world of two centuries ago.....

For all the complaints about stupidity, selfishness, and other irrational behaviors today.....they are a VAST improvement over even the not so distant past.

The level of irrational ignorance as recent as the Gilded Age is staggering in comparison to today.

Sorry for the TJ :smile2:


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

Dyokemm said:


> Yes....we humans are animals.....
> 
> But animals with the capacity to think and exercise our will against our instincts.
> 
> We are not just slaves to instinctual urges.





TaDor said:


> Plenty of proof that we are not.





Dyokemm said:


> Also plenty of proof we are......
> 
> For all of our faults.....humans HAVE made progress......obvious in the material aspects of life and in our scientific understanding of the natural world.....
> 
> ...


As a species we've made a lot of progress since crawling out of the mud.

But there are certain things that can cause us to slough off all of that like a dry, husky, inconvenient outer layer of skin -- and in an instant.

Walking in on an OM/OW banging your spouse is one of those things.

It's a sort of primordial awakening.

Imagine watching some idiot walk up to a bear in a wicker enclosure and poking it with a sharp stick, all the while somehow arrogantly confident that he won't get mauled.

Sure, the enclosure is large enough for a bear.

And it's even strong enough to contain a _docile_ bear.

But an _angry_ bear?

Often enough the answer is no.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

TDSC60 said:


> True story.
> I know a young man in the military stationed at a base in New Mexico. He had early duty so he went to bed leaving his wife and a coworker together in the den "working" on something for a job. He woke up thirsty around 2 AM and as he was walking to the kitchen for water he caught his wife and the coworker in the other bedroom having sex. He escorted the OM through the front doors sans clothing and told his wife to get out. She freaked out and called the cops, thinking that the cops would haul him away as a threat to her. After hearing what happened, the officers asked her to leave the house and asked the man if he had a gun. He did. They told him if he had shot them both in the bed no charges would have been filed. Evidently in that State it is legal to kill your wife and her OM if they are found going at it in your house. 60 days latter the divorce was final.
> 
> This is what I heard first hand from the mouth of the guy involved. He was shocked as was I by the police officers statement.


*That very same "frontier" law is still very much prevalent here today in Texas!*


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## Dyokemm (Apr 24, 2013)

GusPolinski said:


> As a species we've made a lot of progress since crawling out of the mud.
> 
> But there are certain things that can cause us to slough off all of that like a dry, husky, inconvenient outer layer of skin -- and in an instant.
> 
> ...


True enough....suddenly and unexpectedly being confronted by a highly upsetting situation can lead to many, if not most, people losing control of their emotions.....the rational brain loses out to the instinctual and emotional one in the heat of the moment.

The story in the OP of this thread is ample proof of this.

Of course....this cannot explain the actions of a cheater......affairs are not sudden and unexpected situations that the WS is suddenly thrust in to.

Cheaters a very capable of using their rational capacity to avoid an A and betraying their family.....

Problem is...they just don't give a d*mn because they are utterly selfish POS.

They are most certainly not victims of their 'animal instincts'.


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## CantBelieveThis (Feb 25, 2014)

Handy said:


> People dating in non-exclusive relationships have sex with different people.


This totally baffles me about today's hookup culture, incredible....and it's very real and both sexes do it.

Sent from my SM-G930V using Tapatalk


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## CantBelieveThis (Feb 25, 2014)

Uh, this was Colombia guys, did u all realize that? People don't f around on the drug cartels playground. Have you heard what cartels do to people? 

Sent from my SM-G930V using Tapatalk


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

Dyokemm said:


> Also plenty of proof we are......
> 
> For all of our faults.....humans HAVE made progress......obvious in the material aspects of life and in our scientific understanding of the natural world.....
> 
> ...


In morality and ethics we have got far worse in the last 50 years.


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## Dyokemm (Apr 24, 2013)

Diana7 said:


> In morality and ethics we have got far worse in the last 50 years.


I understand why people think that....but it simply isn't true when you research into the historical data.

My view on why to so many it appears so much worse is because of media and communications technology.....and the fact that so many more incidents happen simply because the population is so much higher (it has more than doubled here in the States since 1945)....more people equals more incidents.

It's not that disgusting unethical, immoral, and inhumane things are happening more often today (the data actually shows they are lower as a percentage of population than in the past).....its mainly an impression resulting from the fact we hear about these things today, whereas in the past most of these things would have never been known outside their immediate vicinity.

A perfect example is the story posted in the OP........

We hear about a BH who kills his WW and her POSOM in Columbia in the media today...........most of us not in his hometown would have never heard about this until the creation of the internet......

And that was just around 25 years ago.


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

I don't know that it's any worse than it's ever been -- it's just that we're much more aware of it than we used to be.

People are also less and less ashamed of their **** behavior. Hell, many seem to celebrate it.


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## Dyokemm (Apr 24, 2013)

GusPolinski said:


> I don't know that it's any worse than it's ever been -- it's just that we're much more aware of it than we used to be.
> 
> People are also less and less ashamed of their **** behavior. Hell, many seem to celebrate it.


This is true.....far less shame and more social toleration of crappy behavior today.

These things used to be hidden away as skeletons in the closet as a general rule.....people were truly afraid of social condemnation and repercussions.

Now?.....not so much.


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

Should've said "much worse" instead of "any worse" in that earlier post -- it's almost certainly worse, but I don't know that it's _much_ worse.


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## 10th Engineer Harrison (Dec 11, 2013)

Rocky Mountain Yeti said:


> All perfectly correct.
> I didn't say we aren't animal, I said we aren't JUST animals. Big difference. Sentience and rational thought are crucial differences in determining the level of control we have over our animal nature.
> 
> Likewise, yrs we do have instincts, but as humans, we have the ability to rise above them. Any statement to the contrary is a pathetic attempt to rationalize bad behavior.
> ...


JBFC! Sorry. It wasn't my intention to get your bowels in an uproar.

-10th Engineer Harrison


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## wmn1 (Aug 27, 2014)

uhtred said:


> No, IMHO he is a murderer, they are victims. This isn't the middle ages. People may object to or be offended by adultery, but its not a crime punishable by death.
> 
> He has every right to divorce her and have his lawyers take her for everything she has.


yes except for the fact that what if he was cheated on and then she still won the divorce. You assume that he would take her to the cleaners. Could be a faulty assumption.

Also, someone else pointed out that they are softer on people in these types of cases down there. It is probably true. Different parts of the world. Look how soft Europe is on sentencing murderers. 

Not justifying what he did but we are all putting our justice system standards on Colombia. We aren't them


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## wmn1 (Aug 27, 2014)

Harken Banks said:


> Gordon Lightfoot, Sundown. He later said about the song that was not a good point in his life. People interested in this topic should read Dig's threads. He took it out on a heavy bag in his garage. They reconciled. I talked to him a few times. He is a smart and thoughtful guy. The rage is natural and best controlled and directed in a way that does not involve death or jail. The guy whom he thought to be a friend and was doing whatever with his wife lost his career and reputation. Pretty much everything, I would think. My wife's affair partner also lost his job. Sad sacks both of them now.


I love Gordon. The man.


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## Mr Blunt (Jul 18, 2012)

The murders are way over the top!...




Conversely, in the USA, consequences for adultery are joke….It is possible that a serial adulter that takes every advantage of the innocent spouse that has been a very good husband/wife, in a divorce can get half of all the assets and get a least 50% custody of the children…. In most of the states in the USA the courts do not even allow or want to hear about the betrayals because it makes no difference in the judge’s legal ruling on the divorce!...If a husband finds his wife humping another man and he punches the OM, the husband can go to jail for assault, and the wife can divorce him and get controlling custody of the children and half his assets…Punching a person in the face last a week or two; betrayal infidelity lasts years and sometimes decades and does much more damage than a black eye or a split lip…*The legal consequences for adultery in most states are less than trespassing. Death for adultery is way over the top but the consequences in most USA states are a joke!*

I wonder if mandatory consequences such as the betrayer losing controlling custody of the children and losing all the assets in the marriage to the innocent betrayed spouse would make a difference?...At least the innocent spouse would know that he/she could get some sort of justice for such a damaging ACT as betrayal of the whole family.


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

I'd rather the government stay as far out of people's sex lives as possible. In a world with open marriages, criminalizing adultery seems like a mistake. 



Mr Blunt said:


> The murders are way over the top!...
> 
> 
> 
> ...


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

I always marvel that people are shocked when something as primal as violence is involved with something as primal as mating.


I can reason well but would probably physically obliterate a man that was having sex with my wife, in my home where my children slept. This guy had some premeditation it seems.

I don't believe I would use a weapon. I might slap my wife but wouldn't ever seriously harm her.

The OM would be brutalized and possibly dead before the red haze lifted from me.

Don't f other men's wives. Just don't f'n do it.

Especially in their house with their children.

Put a gun to to your head before doing something that idiotic.

Any man that doesn't expect death or serious injury from doing that is to stupid to breath anyway.


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## Harken Banks (Jun 12, 2012)

ConanHub said:


> I always marvel that people are shocked when something as primal as violence is involved with something as primal as mating.
> 
> 
> I can reason well but would probably physically obliterate a man that was having sex with my wife, in my home where my children slept. This guy had some premeditation it seems.
> ...


I understand this. Killing someone and going to jail is not a good outcome. But I sure as hell would have beat the sh*t out of my wife's boyfriend if we ever met.


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## wmn1 (Aug 27, 2014)

Mr Blunt said:


> The murders are way over the top!...
> 
> 
> 
> ...



I agree Blunt. The consequences for cheating in the US is pathetic. This 'no fault' garbage after someone has been abused for so long and so badly is pathetic. I don't think anyone should lose everything but there should be major consequences


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## wmn1 (Aug 27, 2014)

ConanHub said:


> I always marvel that people are shocked when something as primal as violence is involved with something as primal as mating.
> 
> 
> I can reason well but would probably physically obliterate a man that was having sex with my wife, in my home where my children slept. This guy had some premeditation it seems.
> ...


agreed


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## Mr Blunt (Jul 18, 2012)

It will be interesting to know what Columbia courts will give Garcia for the killings.

I bet he will not get the death penalty like he may in the USA. ALSO, I would bet that he will not get life in the slammer…My guess is less than 25 years….. maybe less than 10 years!


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

Mr Blunt said:


> It will be interesting to know what Columbia courts will give Garcia for the killings.
> 
> I bet he will not get the death penalty like he may in the USA. ALSO, I would bet that he will not get life in the slammer…My guess is less than 25 years….. maybe less than 10 years!


It will be interesting.


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## honcho (Oct 5, 2013)

Mr Blunt said:


> It will be interesting to know what Columbia courts will give Garcia for the killings.
> 
> I bet he will not get the death penalty like he may in the USA. ALSO, I would bet that he will not get life in the slammer…My guess is less than 25 years….. maybe less than 10 years!


Maximum sentence is 40 years in columbia I believe. Columbia most notorious serial killer received 22 years with conviction's for 150+ murders.


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## Mr Blunt (Jul 18, 2012)

Seems like some of the Latin countries do not sentence killers like the USA. Dutch citizen Joran van der Sloot after brutally murdering 21 year old Stephany Flores in Peru only got sentenced to 28 years. Ms. Flores was the daughter of a Ricardo Flores who ran for Vice President and President of Peru. Mr. van der Sloot is the main suspect in the USA teenager Natalee Holloway murder several years earlier. With good behavior Joran may only have to serve only 14 years. Ms. Flores was murdered by Joran because she was looking in Joran’s lap top about the murder of Holloway.



> Ms. Flores was a business student who was less than a year from graduation at the University of Lima.[84] She was the daughter of Ricardo Flores, a former president of the Peruvian Automobile Club and winner of the "Caminos del Inca" rally in 1991. A prominent businessman and entertainment organizer, he ran for vice president in 2001 and for president five years later on fringe tickets
> 
> Due to time already served, the judges said van der Sloot's sentence would end in June 2038. But under Peru's penal system, Van der Sloot could become eligible for parole after serving half of the sentence with good behavior, including work and study. Van der Sloot could be freed sometime in his late 30s if paroled after serving half of his 28-year sentence.


*Garcia may get a light sentence for murdering his adulterous wife and her sex buddy!*

Right or wrong there can be very high consequences for sexual betraying your spouse..It is better to hire a prostitute than screw some man's wife!....Everyone has to be very careful about igniting another person's emotions in sexual relationships; men are not the only one that can get violent with murder; check out the story of Jody Arias on wikipedia!
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Murder_of_Travis_Alexander


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## wmn1 (Aug 27, 2014)

honcho said:


> Maximum sentence is 40 years in columbia I believe. Columbia most notorious serial killer received 22 years with conviction's for 150+ murders.


yep, my point exactly and sadly. Weak systems there and in Europe


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