# Book on increAsing sexual intimacy



## Schoolbus (Jul 4, 2015)

My wife and I are a bit incompatible in the bedroom. We have different tastes and interests. She has a very hard time getting out of her head and being present. Can you offer any good books on increasing sexual intimacy? She is open to reading one but I was caught off guard with no suggestions. Most everything I've read is from the male perspective.
_Posted via Mobile Device_
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## john117 (May 20, 2013)

Reading a book and following up on what the book says are quite different. 

Marital counseling may be a better venue...


----------



## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

I agree with John, 

You can't just buy her a book to solve this one. Everyone's tastes are different. For example if you want her to be a strict dominatrix and she wants you to be her mystic tantric masseuse, the solution would be very different to a couple where say he mainly wants oral and she just wants starfish missionary after going out for a five-star meal. 

Some readers here may be able to help, but you will have to elaborate on your situation. 

Best wishes,
Badsanta


----------



## john117 (May 20, 2013)

A five star meal turns anyone into a starfish - just saying


----------



## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

What do you mean different interests in the bedroom? You're going to have to be more specific if you want real help. 

If she needs to get out of her head in order to relax and become aroused I suggest good old fashioned erotica, smut, written porn, bodice ripping stroke stories that can be found for free at my favorite smut peddler literotica dot com. Not allowed to link it here...

Your wife can peruse stories from the many different genres that get her boat floating and chest heaving. She might need to figure out which stories really do it for her and which stories do not so its always best to start off with "erotic coupling" category...which I find rather tame...but I'm not a tame kinda girl. She can read gay porn, which a lot of women really dig. Don't ask I don't know why exactly. She can read the fan fiction found in Nonhuman which is littered with Stephanie Meyers wanna be vampire and werewolf alpha male beasties. Not my cuppa but it seems to be popular among the under 25 crowd.

But here is a hint, don't ask her what she is reading, just ask her if it's good. If it's good, she'll reach over just as you're falling asleep to test your reflexes, if you get my meaning. My husband loves it when I find a good story. It's like going to bed on Christmas Eve except you get woken up for your present!


----------



## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

Anon Pink said:


> My husband loves it when I find a good story. It's like going to bed on Christmas Eve except you get woken up for your present!


The typical book my wife might read while going to bed would be something like the Dalai Lama's _Art of Happiness_. I don't know why she never wakes me up?


----------



## Young at Heart (Jan 6, 2015)

Schoolbus said:


> ....She has a very hard time getting out of her head and being present. Can you offer any good books on increasing sexual intimacy?.....


Assuming she was honest. May I suggest that you get a book on either sensate focus exercises or couples massage.

My wife has a hard time clearing her head of things she needs to remember for work and things on her to-do list. She needs to completely let go of that in order to get into sex.

We have developed a ritual, where she initiates, and she will lay across my body while I massage her back, shoulders and neck.
that helps her get into a mental place where she is totally relaxed and ready for sex.

Good luck to you.


----------

