# Can we survive this? Should we get married?



## 1lostintranslation (Apr 10, 2012)

So my fiance and I have been together for 6 months. Moved in together last month. The both of us together have 5 kids all girls. His 2 live with us only part time. We both work full time and go to school full time. He also commutes an hour back and forth to work each day since we moved in together. We have also found out in January we are expect so we are due beginning of October. Planning an August wedding. Problem is we fight all the time about the dumbest stuff. He feels I am just nagging and just complaining. And honestly I have gotten to the point where I don't want to say anything and just hide my feelings. We used to be able to talk about anything and everything. Things were great....then it seems life hit. I don't trust him. See previous post about him calling ex-fiance back after she had called him when we were together. And now he feels the need to keep password protected email & texts. Why do this if you have nothing to hide? I don't do that with anything of mine. Plus the pregnancy is taking a toll on me physically and mentally. I feel like i've lost myself and don't know where to find me anymore. I feel like the communication is broken, have limited time together, and things just are kinda not what I expected. This is suppose to be a happy time I thought and because of my doubts I have not even followed through with reserving our wedding & reception venue. What to do? I guess my fear is if I am unhappy now then marriage won't help matters...right? Please advice would really help and be appreciated.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Have you not asked this about 4 different times? I could have sworn I commented on this exact thing. Along with many other people who have commented.


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## Browncoat (Mar 25, 2012)

Yeah I think she has posted before.

You're in a tricky situation, seek a professional councilor for the both of you. If things are bad now, they will only get worse with a new baby and all the complications that married life brings.


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## jectruc (Apr 11, 2012)

You posted the same story 5x in 5 different places.

That's spamming.

And annoying!


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## SlowlyGettingWiser (Apr 7, 2012)

Lost:

There are currently ELEVEN (11, XI) REPLIES to this post that you made on the 'General Relationship' board and you have not responded to them. Go read them. Or did you just not like/agree with the advice you were given there?

BTW: I see that you are still currently on-line at TAM. So go over there and discuss.


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## spearcarrier (Apr 6, 2012)

I read you're posted elsewhere before, but I've never given my two cents. 

Yeah, being pregnant is tiring.
Yeah, it's VERY important to vent. But you're not venting. You're phrasing things as if asking for advice.
And yeah, it sounds like he's up to something.

1. See about taking communication classes together, being as it seems there's a communication breakdown between you two.
2. Seek help with your trust issues.

And above all, quite frankly, if he were someone that's passwording everything I would be having more than second thoughts on him. I'd be having first thoughts on how I was going to move on. Mind you, I personally have been burned many times by people like that so I'm jaded. Your situation may be like that. But if it's all of a sudden there are two things you should consider.

1. Why is he doing it. (Of course.)
2. Have you done something to destroy his trust.

Like it or not, you're going to have to think what's right for the kids first. If you're fighting all of the time, imagine what you're teaching your children.


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