# Tell me what you think about my Marriage



## Imlost33 (May 4, 2015)

Hi my name is Mark and im from CA, and im married and living in Europe.

I have been married for 2 years now and i think im done and my wife is done. Its a long story, but in a nutshell here is it. My wife who i believe to be mentally ill, but maybe im wrong. I live in a small apartement and my wife has a son and daughter from her previous 2 failed marriages. The son is 27 and the daughtter 30. The son is a bum basically , he went to college for 4 years and has not had a real job in years, he had some paid interships then they end and he collects unemployment for a year and lays on his butt.

He has never had a real job and he visits his mother, my wife every month, and then goes to his fathers for one month and does this for years and doesnt work. Now he lived with us for 6 months and laid on his lazy butt and wakes up, yes wakes up at 2pm and goes to bed at 4am everyday and does nothing, my wife says nothing. Me im in a foreign country and looking for work for now i teach english to make money.. My wife goes off on me always that i dont work i dont have a real job, but her 27 year old son lays on his lazy butt and never leaves his room and watches videos all day and throws his Resume out once a month.

Now i cant stand it, its killing me cause she stands up for him and i tell her its me or him, i want him out and he needs a job, her reply is its none of my business what he does. So 7 months later he finds a job in another country and i said yesssssssssssssss he is gone and i know he will come visit, but how often, he is 3 hours away by train, not far enough in my opinion. Well my wife said he will come every 2 months and see me, i said ohhhhhhhhhhhhh ok i can deal with that, well lets see he is has moved out 6 weeks ago and has visited 3 yes 3 times already.

I guess my point is this is not normal behaviour for me or for any man and to me he and my wife cant let go of eachother, she keeps him trapped like a child and treats him like he is 12. She invites him, he doesnt ask to come.

The daughter completlly normal lives on her on has a 10 year old child and doesnt really want to see the mother. When the grandson comes the son comes and its one big happy family for them, not for me, and the son showers naked, yes naked with the 10 year old grandson, howwwwwwwwwwwww weird is that.

There is just to much to tell, my wife is ultra ultra sensitive, you try to joke with her, have a little humour she takes it as a personel attack, i cant win, i cant have a talk with her.

Now what i havent done that i should of, i have lived here 1 year and have had a very hard time learining the langauge, very hard, and i have kinda gave up, but im making a little money, but my wife just pounds and poounds me leanrn the langauge or go back to your country.

ANY THOUGHTS ON THIS SITUATION.


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## Orange_Pekoe (Jan 5, 2015)

I have learned the very hard way that life is too short to spend it with people who make you miserable.

In your case it is a step-son. In my case it was a sister-in-law + some other in laws.

Now that they are out of my life, I am MUCH HAPPIER. Unfortunately, I had to lose my husband in the process. Some people make themselves packaged deals and don't understand the damage they are doing to their marriage by not drawing boundaries with their family members. If it was a young child I would understand, or an elder who needs help and can't live alone. Your case is not like that. This is an adult who is fully capable of taking care of himself.


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## Orange_Pekoe (Jan 5, 2015)

And WHY THE HELL IS HE SHOWERING WITH A 10 YEAR OLD?

The hell!?


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## NotLikeYou (Aug 30, 2011)

Imlost33 said:


> ANY THOUGHTS ON THIS SITUATION.


Yes.

Given your lack of punctuation, capitalization, and proper spelling, I think you will not make much money teaching English in a foreign country.

You have not created an environment for yourself where you will thrive, prosper, or even succeed.

And it sounds like your "Wife Picker" is defective as well.

Besides, europeon wimmen have hairy armpits and bad teeth. Some of them even have bad hair-y teeth. Probably.

You should consider coming back to California. Even if its a silly place filled with silly people, its still better than europe.



Well, YOU ASKED!!!!!!


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## ScrambledEggs (Jan 14, 2014)

NotLikeYou said:


> You should consider coming back to California. Even if its a silly place filled with silly people, its still better than europe.
> 
> 
> 
> Well, YOU ASKED!!!!!!


Upon landing go immediately to the nearest shooting range and let off a few rounds, then get a big steak, and then spend the rest of the evening drinking whiskey and listening to Johnny Cash and your soul will be cleansed of all this.

Seriously though, I What Orange said. And I can relate to the lanuage thing and living abroad--done that. You have to force yourself into professional and social situations where you must speak the local language, however, badly, or you will never get it. And its extra hard because everyone around you wants to practice their english on you.


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## john117 (May 20, 2013)

Europe is not a country. So generalizations about Europe don't work. In Italy it's normal for 30 year old kids to live at home.

Having said this you're in a lose lose situation. Way too many people have tried the "teach English" job route and it rarely works unless you know the local language well etc. It may work in some places but not in general

I would suggest you call it a day and move back. What did you see in Europe / your wife that was worth it moving there?

Transplanted European near beautiful Paducah


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