# Preparations for separation, D when 1yr is up



## rubpy3 (Nov 19, 2013)

I recently found out about that the WW is in a PA with OM. The PA started about October.

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/coping-infidelity/142722-found-out-about-pa-now-what.html

During the confrontation, the WW openly told me that she wants to experience life that she never had chance before (nightclubs, binge drinking, ONS, other men). After Dday, I am staying at a friend's place. During the entire duration that I was gone, she made no attempt to contact me.

I'm going back tomorrow night. I plan to pack up my stuff tomorrow night, and move out of our apartment by Wen morning. I will stay at a monastery for the time being. I plan to take our family dog without telling her about it (this will really set her off).

After we are not under same roof anymore, I'll start talking to lawyers about best ways to divide property, etc.

I'll keep this thread updated as we go through the process. I hope I can get insight from other posters on how to make this process as drama free as possible so that I can move on with my own life.


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## helolover (Aug 24, 2012)

Before you remove one more thing from your apartment, check your state's divorce laws about moving out. She may have cause under abandonment or desertion if you do. 

Otherwise, why wait to contact a lawyer? 

Do you have kids? (it didn't seem so from reading)

As far as being drama free: 

50 Divorce Tips for Men - Chris Pirillo


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## rubpy3 (Nov 19, 2013)

> No. Divorce is essentially a “no-fault” procedure, and the conduct of a spouse is not to be considered by the court unless the conduct relates to the ability of a spouse to exercise responsibility for a child. Family assets will be divided without assessment of blame for the breakdown of the marriage. However, as a practical matter, any action which leaves the other spouse in possession of the family assets or children of the marriage gives that spouse a tactical advantage in the proceedings which may follow: the old adage that “possession is 9/10ths of the law” certainly applies in a family law context.


Doesn't sound like there's an abandonment clause here (Canada).

No kids.

I'm not home right now - I'm staying at a different state after the D-day.


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