# Please help i need some advice



## Isacoco (Apr 30, 2017)

Im new here and i really need some advice before i go crazy.married for 10 yrs with 2 kids age 5 and 3 yrs old Month of february this yr my husband 56 yr old and im 39 yr ,told me he dont love me any more i ask him if he have someone else and he said no so i belive him and ask him what he wants does he want divorce and he said no but after 1week he said he dont want to lie anymore he meet someone 19 yr old girl so i said i want him to move out the next morning he pack all hes clothes and go but diring the day he keep txting me that hes not with the girl etc about 7pm same day he txt saying hes coming back home coz he miss me and the kids so i let him come back with out any question but the thing is when he come back hes different person he dont want to share same bedroom and hes going out everynight if i stop him he become very rude and nasty to me , he told me he wanted separation but still living in same house he dont want me to stop him he wants to live like a single man he dont have time with the kids when hes at home,then i found out that the 19 yr old girl ignore him after he give some money to the girl .one day he told me he wants to start again me with in the morning feels everything is going good but did not last long after we eat dinner he have a txt from other girl that wants to met him he told me about the txt i ask him what do you want to do he said that this girl is in hes mind all the time so he wanted to met her he said hes very curios to find out more about the girl she 23 yrs old so i said its up to you ,the next day he meet the girl and when he come home hes very happy and said the girl is almost perfect that night he become a stranger to me so i told him if you want to meet that girl again i want him to move out and he did the next day he mive out coz hes very sure that the girl love him and he fall inlove with the girl it lasted 3weeks hes living alone in the flat and date with the girl what make me angry is he txt where ever he go or if he have a date with the girl ,after 3weeks he visit the kids and say he wants to come back home i ask him why he said its getting lonely living on hes own and he miss the kids,for the second time i take him back home he told me that he dont have girl friend any more that he change and not looking any other girl but he did not say to me that he wants to be my husband again he still say that he dont love me,living with him is ok i dont feel that im hes wife i feel that i dont have a right to stop him hes been out everynight come home early morning he said he only have a drink with hes friend guys no girls i do belive him ,lately we have sex and we both enjoy it he start to talk with me cuddle me again but what i dont like is that he go out everynight make me angry yet i cant stop him, i ask him to move out if he keep going out everynight but he dont want to move out insted he said he will come home before 12pm which he did,, pls hel im confuse doest my husband loves me ? What should i do im living in the limbo any advice wilcome i need someone who can tell me what should i do, after all that he still say he dont love me thats why im confuse


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## Happykat (Mar 29, 2016)

He does NOT love you. Love means NOT breaking spouse's heart on purpose.

He comes back home because there's a maid to cook, wash and clean for him. He comes back home because he doesn't want to waste money on extra rent. He comes back home because he likes his house.


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## Happykat (Mar 29, 2016)

Doormats have low value and men are not attracted to doormats. Don't be a doormat.


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## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

Isacoco, sorry you in this dreadful situation. The first thing that strikes me is that you need to lay down boundaries.
Your WH has his cake and is eating it to, by allowing him back into the house you are basically giving him permission to go off with these OW and come back.

You should kick him out of the house. Tell him under no circumstances do you want to have anything to do with him except though a lawyer (go and see one for your options).

1. Do not sleep with him, tell him to move to another bedroom or kick him out
2. Get STD tested
3. Tell him the marriage is over unless he stops these activities with OW immediately. It sounds like he might be having a mid life crisis but that does not mean you have to let him back in the house
4. Tell him that you will proceed with a divorce unless he stops going out late, meeting OW and is willing to get MC and IC
he is treating you terribly and frankly you are allowing it. For some people, once he walked out the door that would be it, no more chances. YOU need to grow a back bone and have some self respect.
Do you have any family you can rely on in the meantime, or close friends. If so you should let them know what is happening


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

@EleGirl dear....the wall of text.

You love to say it. 
Me? My eyes....read every 10th word. 

I gleen the meaning easily, cut through the chaff....as do the weed wackers who populate my country.

They throw out the baby with the bath water. I never do. I love em....poop and all.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Isacoco,

If you want people to read your posts, do some things to make them easier to read. Use punctuation. Use sentences and paragraphs. This post is a wall of text, not punctuation, no sentences. Don't make people have to work hard to read you posts.





Isacoco said:


> Im new here and i really need some advice before i go crazy.married for 10 yrs with 2 kids age 5 and 3 yrs old Month of february
> 
> this yr my husband 56 yr old and im 39 yr ,told me he dont love me any more i ask him if he have someone else and he said no
> 
> ...


I broke that text up to sort of paragraphs.


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