# Lost, Hurt and confussed! Pleeease help!!



## Pinkey

I married my best friend my soul mate 23 years ago! we have had an awsome marriage up til a little over a year ago. He started lying and being really flirtatous with our soon to be daughter-in-law and a very close friend of mine. I started feeling my security being broken. We have always been able to communicate in a very loving way. He started to close me off and not talk to me about his feelings and started spending more and more time with these other women and my emotions started towonder and I started feeling he was having an affair. All the symptoms seem to be there but he swears he wouldnt do that and i want to believe him. Our closeness has almost come to an end cause he says he cant handle me keeping tabs on him anymore. I try so hard but the lying still ishappening and nowhe uses the excuse that hes going to see our grandkids but dont want me to come along.
One moment he says and shows his love and the next he says hes not in love with me any more and blames it on the acqusations. I just am so lost and confused he wont even allow me to share my feelings anymore with him cause he ends up getting angry! If any one has any advise or input please help! I trid getting him to go see a councaler but he says "been there, done that and it dont work."


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## shelleyv

It sounds like he is doing something behind your back. In my experience, when they start doing things without you, no longer communicate the same way, and get angry when you bring it up, they are hiding something. Do you know if he has ever cheated on you before? He might be going through a little of a mid-life crisis or something but that is still no reason to shut you out. Not after so many years of happy marriage. You need to confront him. Go with you gut - its always right. You need to let him know that he cannot treat you this way - its unacceptable.


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## Minne6

I dont think confronting him will work. You already confronted him, and that is not working. It seems like men now days enjoy when woman start having our own lives. Make ourselves not so attached to them. I think you should start doing things on your own, ignore. Make him feel interested in you and the new things that are going on with you.


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