# sleeping with the enemy



## nenigoat (Oct 8, 2009)

:scratchhead: so I hooked up with my husband a few weeks ago and agreeded there would be no strings attached since he says he doesnt love me or want me. I ended up with feelings that I thought I would be able to control. I love him. He has nothing to offer me emotionally, financially, nothing. No job, no house, no education. But I love him. We r supposed to hook up again and try to do the no strings attached thing, but I dont know if I can do it with out involving my feelings. 
Should I not have sex with him? Will these times we have together help our situation in anyway? I want him to love me again...we have 3 kids 11, 8, 7. I've been with him since I was 16. PLEASE HELP and be honest!! 

Thanks!


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## jessi (Feb 11, 2009)

My gut feeling says why would you put yourself out there, I take it you 2 are separated. It sounds like he has told you at least for the time being that he can't offer you anything....of course he wants your get togethers but what will you actually get out of it..
I think you could start with just spending a bit of time together, coffee, watch a movie, figure out if there are any feelings left for him or you....spend time apart in order to miss each other. There is no rush take your time and really figure out what you want and what you are actually getting out of this relationship.
Work on your self esteem and take care of you and your kids and make him do a little work in this relationship, it sounds like you are the only one making any moves right now.....


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## Corpuswife (Apr 24, 2009)

Sex will hurt you in the long run. 

He has nothing to offer you (your words).

He has stated he doesn't want anything but sex (how cold and uncaring).

You stated that you love him and will have trouble with feelings.

Now, if you continue the sex side of the relationship. 

He won't feel anything different as your WHOLE relationship will not have changed.

You will be left clinging to a relationship that is unhealthy and will not allow you to move forward with bigger and better things/people.

I wouldn't do it. No matter how sexually connected you feel.


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## Ash22 (Oct 21, 2009)

Nope, don't do it. Flat out...you'll just get hurt. He wants no strings attached and just after one hook-up you already got your feelings involved. Let it go, better to deal with the pain of him only wanting sex from you then being strung along.


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## knortoh (Sep 5, 2009)

No


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