# Revenge



## MadMax (Jan 31, 2014)

New York Times 2004:

''The best way to understand revenge is not as some disease or moral failing or crime but as a deeply human and sometimes very functional behavior,'' said Dr. Michael McCullough, a psychologist at the University of Miami. ''Revenge can be a very good deterrent to bad behavior, and bring feelings of completeness and fulfillment.''

Retaliatory acts, anthropologists have long argued, help keep people in line where formal laws or enforcement do not exist. Before Clint Eastwood and Arnold Schwarzenegger, there was Alexander Hamilton, whose fatal duel with Aaron Burr was commemorated this month on the banks of the Hudson River. Recent research has shown that stable communities depend on people who have ''an intrinsic taste for punishing others who violate a community's norms,'' said Dr. Joseph Henrich, an anthropologist at Emory University in Atlanta.


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## The Middleman (Apr 30, 2012)

Sounds about right to me! I've been saying the exact thing here all along when it comes to matters of infidelity and too many people here say I'm wrong. I believe in getting even with a wayward spouse, even if you are reconciling. I'm a firm believer that revenge is an important step in healing one's self. Nothing beats the feeling that "they didn't get away with it."


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## MadMax (Jan 31, 2014)

Most of the revenge threads I've read here talk about RA's which seem like cutting off your nose to spite your face.

Has anyone exposed an affair that was already over? How did that turn out?


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## DiamondsandRust (Jan 21, 2014)

true i agree completely, before i knew that she got her karma back, i was having a hard time. once i found out that she didnt get away with it(I made a call to get even). I felt so much better and a heavy weight was lifted off my chest.


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## adriana (Dec 21, 2013)

Success is the best revenge.


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## DiamondsandRust (Jan 21, 2014)

for me the story was. 

her friend set her up to meet at her house and the OM too. 
she called her mom. her mom showed up and busted them. the OM who is a supervisor at her work fled the scene. 

that night i found out his number so i txt him and told him that me and my wife had sex before she was supposed to go to work. 
told him, i was gonna expose his affair with his boss at work. 
he played it smart and didnt admit to any. 

next day i called her work and i told them that the supervisor and my wife were having an affair. 

guy almost lost his job, and under investigation. wife had to beg to keep her job. but I guess the guy dumped her to keep his job. 

but we'll see where this all ends.


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## MadMax (Jan 31, 2014)

adriana said:


> Success is the best revenge.


I don't know if that's enough. 

... virtuous vengeance rests on the foundational principle that ‘the very
concept of a wrong or evil action entails that it should be met with a hostile response. - Peter A. French


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## brokeneric (Jan 27, 2014)

Revenge is the best ointment for a BS' heart.


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## TheFlood117 (Mar 24, 2013)

A few weeks ago I screwed OM's STBXW. 

What can I say, I felt 'entitled'. Poor thing. I don't think she ever got done that good before. 

So, I've blown up his marriage, ruined his professional life, and screwed his wife- in their house too, lol. 

Well actually it's her house now, lol.


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## brokeneric (Jan 27, 2014)

TheFlood117 said:


> A few weeks ago I screwed OM's STBXW.
> 
> What can I say, I felt 'entitled'. Poor thing. I don't think she ever got done that good before.
> 
> ...


I find you inspirational. Sadly, I can't do to OM's wife what my WW and OM did.


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## TheFlood117 (Mar 24, 2013)

brokeneric said:


> I find you inspirational. Sadly, I can't do to OM's wife what my WW and OM did.


Never say never. Sometimes the powers that be give us these little moments when we least expect them. :smthumbup:


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## Harken Banks (Jun 12, 2012)

I do not know much about the subject. And I should. At the moment it seems to me to be about putting yourself back on a footing you are comfortable with. But I do not think of it as revenge. Unless shrugging off victimhood is revenge.


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## thummper (Dec 19, 2013)

brokeneric said:


> I find you inspirational. *Sadly, I **can't do to OM's wife what my WW and OM did.[/*QUOTE]
> 
> Why not?


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

TheFlood117 said:


> A few weeks ago I screwed OM's STBXW.
> 
> What can I say, I felt 'entitled'. Poor thing. I don't think she ever got done that good before.
> 
> ...


And treating her like a piece of meat, how did that work for you?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Fenix (Jul 2, 2013)

Revenge becomes problematic when there are children involved.

Ultimately, I agree with living well/success as the best revenge. Vengefulness as a character trait is very unappealing and a huge red flag. Work on acceptance and moving on. Although I am not a advocate of revenge, I am also not pro forgiveness. I simply do not want to waste another minute on the POS I left behind.


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## TopsyTurvy5 (Nov 16, 2013)

Revenge is never a good idea to my way of thinking. I would rather let the relationship go and move on to something better. If you need revenge to move forward with your WS, then you have a litany of issues besides the affair. If you need revenge to move on, you have more issues than the affair. There are better, more productive ways of dealing with an affair.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## workindad (May 7, 2011)

Most of the revenge threads I've read here talk about RA's which seem like cutting off your nose to spite your face.

Has anyone exposed an affair that was already over? How did that turn out?
[Reply] [!!]

Yes I did or at least I tried. My xWW's sugar daddy is married. I contacted his wife because I believe she has a right to know and to make informed decisions about her life and I thought it only fair that sugar daddy should be held accountable in his life. She didn't want to hear it. I think it is best to expose sooner rather than later.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## TheFlood117 (Mar 24, 2013)

MattMatt said:


> And treating her like a piece of meat, how did that work for you?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_



I didn't treat her like a piece of meat. Unless you call me giving her multiple orgasms treating her like a piece of meat. 

And in that case, I think every woman would like to be 'meatified' in such a manner. 

And she wanted me. I didn't have to really push it at all (well there was some pushing . )But she wanted to bang. So I did. 

Not like I'm having an affair or anything.


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## TopsyTurvy5 (Nov 16, 2013)

^Classy. 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## TheFlood117 (Mar 24, 2013)

TopsyTurvy5 said:


> ^Classy.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_



say's the dude that posts in threads about anal sex and lubrication and blood and fecal matter. 

Cool story brah.


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## TopsyTurvy5 (Nov 16, 2013)

Still worlds better than having revenge sex and the bragging about it like you are 15. Cool to know you are looking up my posts. It's nice to have a fan. Now get out of your mom's basement and grow up.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## russell28 (Apr 17, 2013)

The Middleman said:


> Sounds about right to me! I've been saying the exact thing here all along when it comes to matters of infidelity and too many people here say I'm wrong. I believe in getting even with a wayward spouse, even if you are reconciling. I'm a firm believer that revenge is an important step in healing one's self. Nothing beats the feeling that "they didn't get away with it."


The best revenge is to stay faithful in R.. By going out and having a revenge affair, you are basically saying you're an immature selfish individual too, and you can also make stupid life choices and have no boundaries. You're also saying that you're a liar, and a cheater, and then what, blame them? Sound familiar?

Don't change who you are, because somebody does you wrong.. it may change you in ways, but don't let it tear apart your moral fiber and make you become what they were.

Now, if you talk about it, go to Vegas, make it legal and use protection.. I could see where it might be good to allow the BS to get some strange, without abusing anyone, spouse or AP (whoever they suck into the revenge affair).. I should book a trip to the bunny ranch now that I'm thinking abou..tit...


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## TheFlood117 (Mar 24, 2013)

TopsyTurvy5 said:


> Still worlds better than having revenge sex and the bragging about it like you are 15. Cool to know you are looking up my posts. It's nice to have a fan. Now get out of your mom's basement and grow up.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_



Hey now. 

This is a VERY nice basement. Very warm in the winter and surprisingly spacious. Plus, it's got all my world of warcraft games and comic books. 

I no want to leave. y u no like basements???


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## russell28 (Apr 17, 2013)

TheFlood117 said:


> I didn't treat her like a piece of meat. Unless you call me giving her multiple orgasms treating her like a piece of meat.
> 
> And in that case, I think every woman would like to be 'meatified' in such a manner.
> 
> ...


You had sex with her, to punish your WW.. and she had sex with you to punish her WH? Did you video it and send it along, or just tell them about it?


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## russell28 (Apr 17, 2013)

TheFlood117 said:


> Hey now.
> 
> This is a VERY nice basement. Very warm in the winter and surprisingly spacious. Plus, it's got all my world of warcraft games and comic books.
> 
> I no want to leave. y u no like basements???


You play Warcraft AND touched a girl.. wow, you're pretty cool.


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## convert (Oct 4, 2013)

It is interesting to see the post with the most likes here.

I had the chance to do a RA but could not go through with it and that made feel like even less of a man.


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## Harken Banks (Jun 12, 2012)

russell28 said:


> You had sex with her, to punish your WW.. and she had sex with you to punish her WH? Did you video it and send it along, or just tell them about it?


I am failing to see who got hurt by this.


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## convert (Oct 4, 2013)

^^ maybe no body but at least they had fun


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## WyshIknew (Aug 18, 2012)

TopsyTurvy5 said:


> Revenge is never a good idea to my way of thinking. I would rather let the relationship go and move on to something better. If you need revenge to move forward with your WS, then you have a litany of issues besides the affair. If you need revenge to move on, you have more issues than the affair. There are better, more productive ways of dealing with an affair.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


As you say, to your way of thinking. You aren't everyone.

You will see many ways of dealing with this crap on here, from the "These people are like dogshet, and the only thing you do with dogshet is scrape it off your shoe and walk away from the stench" option.

Through to the option, as described by TheFlood.

If it truly helps them deal with what they are going through and allows them to move on with their head held high who is to say whether they are right or wrong?

As far as I am concerned if it doesn't hurt anybody else and it helps them deal with this crap then it's all good.

For the record my own opinion is that you can't put out a fire by throwing petrol (gasoline) on it. But who knows, when push comes to shove I might very well act as TheFlood did. And I'd damn well make sure the two AP's got to hear of it if I did, otherwise what is the point?


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## TheFlood117 (Mar 24, 2013)

russell28 said:


> You had sex with her, to punish your WW.. and she had sex with you to punish her WH? Did you video it and send it along, or just tell them about it?


Nope. She is not wife anymore. And he is not her husband. I am not reconciling so it was not a true "revenge affair". Now, I did take pleasure in it. I mean, c'mon what man wouldn't? It just happened. I actually went over there cause she told me she needed to talk about "them" asap. I went there thinking there was more to it or they were planning to run off together or some crazy sh!t. But then it just happened. She knew what she wanted and she got it. I will never tell my ex. Ever. 

The repercussions of my ex wife and her ex husbands affair is on them. Part of that is you lose people that once loved you more than anything in the world. When similarly damaged people have commonalities and their both attractive and like sex, things happen. We both probably have some un-resolved issues even tho the marriages are over.


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

I love this thread. Revenge in my definition, is doing the same amount of damage in the same manner.
That makes it hard to get revenge on a cheater because they hurt someone innocent. A cheater is far from innocent. 

I do believe that crappy actions come with a cost.

There are many things I let go, but if someone attacked my family, I would make them pay.

If my wife ever strayed, the resulting divorce would definitely be enough devastation in her world, the POSOM however ....

I would make sure his humiliation and mental/emotional pain was so intense and unrelenting that he would have to move to another state to try and start over because whatever passed for his life before would be in ashes.

People do need to pay for their wrongdoing and it does give peace to many involved or affected by crappy behavior.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

TheFlood117 said:


> A few weeks ago I screwed OM's STBXW.
> 
> What can I say, I felt 'entitled'. Poor thing. I don't think she ever got done that good before.
> 
> ...


I think it's ironic and funny. Glad you both had some fun, you both deserve a little fun after what your W's put you through.

I remember reading your thread. Hope your doing well.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## MrHappyHat (Oct 24, 2012)

TheFlood117 said:


> Nope. She is not wife anymore. And he is not her husband. I am not reconciling so it was not a true "revenge affair". Now, I did take pleasure in it. I mean, c'mon what man wouldn't? It just happened. I actually went over there cause she told me she needed to talk about "them" asap. I went there thinking there was more to it or they were planning to run off together or some crazy sh!t. But then it just happened. She knew what she wanted and she got it. I will never tell my ex. Ever.
> 
> The repercussions of my ex wife and her ex husbands affair is on them. Part of that is you lose people that once loved you more than anything in the world. When similarly damaged people have commonalities and their both attractive and like sex, things happen. We both probably have some un-resolved issues even tho the marriages are over.



It wasn't revenge, it was solace.


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## russell28 (Apr 17, 2013)

Harken Banks said:


> I am failing to see who got hurt by this.


If you're divorced, and you're obsessing on getting revenge, or hurting your ex... you're actually hurting yourself. So in this case, he hurt himself by doing the opposite of the 180, and being so attached to his ex that he's out boinking her OM's ex, to try to hurt her.. if he really cares about his ex that much, he probably should go sleep with her and just be done with it.  I doubt her or her OM are hurt, they are probably thinking it's good, they can have less guilt..


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## 3putt (Dec 3, 2012)

russell28 said:


> If you're divorced, and you're obsessing on getting revenge, or hurting your ex... *you're actually hurting yourself. * So in this case, he hurt himself by doing the opposite of the 180, and being so attached to his ex that he's out boinking her OM's ex, to try to hurt her.. if he really cares about his ex that much, he probably should go sleep with her and just be done with it. I doubt her or her OM are hurt, they are probably thinking it's good, they can have less guilt..


Yeah, the pain and agony in Flood's posts is palpable.


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## russell28 (Apr 17, 2013)

TheFlood117 said:


> Nope. She is not wife anymore. And he is not her husband. I am not reconciling so it was not a true "revenge affair". Now, I did take pleasure in it. I mean, c'mon what man wouldn't? It just happened. I actually went over there cause she told me she needed to talk about "them" asap. I went there thinking there was more to it or they were planning to run off together or some crazy sh!t. But then it just happened. She knew what she wanted and she got it. I will never tell my ex. Ever.
> 
> The repercussions of my ex wife and her ex husbands affair is on them. Part of that is you lose people that once loved you more than anything in the world. When similarly damaged people have commonalities and their both attractive and like sex, things happen. We both probably have some un-resolved issues even tho the marriages are over.


She needed you to talk about them, you ran over there to talk about them.. why would you care if they run off together.. etc..

You both need to move on...


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## russell28 (Apr 17, 2013)

3putt said:


> Yeah, the pain and agony in Flood's posts is palpable.


"Part of that is you lose people that once loved you more than anything in the world. When similarly damaged people have commonalities"

"We both probably have some un-resolved issues even tho the marriages are over."

Sounds like he's living the life...


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## ThePheonix (Jan 3, 2013)

TopsyTurvy5 said:


> Still worlds better than having revenge sex and the bragging about it like you are 15. Cool to know you are looking up my posts. It's nice to have a fan. Now get out of your mom's basement and grow up.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Come on Dawg, cut Flood some slack. You'd be surprised the number of chicks with cheating husbands that even the score. I'd bet two to one this chick set it up. Face it, doing the spouse of the person that done your spouse would, as the old tv commercial said, would double your pleasure and double your fun. Hence, the multiple O's.


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## russell28 (Apr 17, 2013)

I'm actually happy for him in ways, and feel bad for him in other ways.. The whole situation sucks. I'm glad he got to bang the OMW, but hope he gets to a place soon where he can find peace with the whole crap fest...

I'm talking revenge, while trying to R, that's where my post started out.. in reply to that situation. The gas on the fire thing..


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## 10th Engineer Harrison (Dec 11, 2013)

TheFlood117 said:


> Nope. She is not wife anymore. And he is not her husband. I am not reconciling so it was not a true "revenge affair". Now, I did take pleasure in it. I mean, c'mon what man wouldn't? It just happened. I actually went over there cause she told me she needed to talk about "them" asap. I went there thinking there was more to it or they were planning to run off together or some crazy sh!t. But then it just happened. She knew what she wanted and she got it. I will never tell my ex. Ever.
> 
> The repercussions of my ex wife and her ex husbands affair is on them. Part of that is you lose people that once loved you more than anything in the world. When similarly damaged people have commonalities and their both attractive and like sex, things happen. We both probably have some un-resolved issues even tho the marriages are over.


But when you describe the event this way, it's not revenge after all.

-ol' 2long


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## vellocet (Oct 18, 2013)

The Middleman said:


> Sounds about right to me! I've been saying the exact thing here all along when it comes to matters of infidelity and too many people here say I'm wrong. I believe in getting even with a wayward spouse, even if you are reconciling. I'm a firm believer that revenge is an important step in healing one's self. Nothing beats the feeling that "they didn't get away with it."


I also believe in getting even with a WS in some non-violent way.

But revenge cheating wouldn't be one of them because I'd just be stooping to the cheaters level, would become no better than them, and wouldn't be a decent man any good woman should want. A cheater is a cheater.


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## Harken Banks (Jun 12, 2012)

vellocet said:


> I also believe in getting even with a WS in some non-violent way.
> 
> But revenge cheating wouldn't be one of them because I'd just be stooping to the cheaters level, would become no better than them, and wouldn't be a decent man any good woman should want. A cheater is a cheater.


Racer seems to have made a study of this.


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## Chris989 (Jul 3, 2012)

MadMax said:


> Most of the revenge threads I've read here talk about RA's which seem like cutting off your nose to spite your face.
> 
> Has anyone exposed an affair that was already over? How did that turn out?


Check the links in my sig to see.

Also, I created a Facebook account for my then wife with the full story of what happened and with whom, then invited everyone she knew and anyone I could think of that might know the POSOM or his GF to be her "friend". I wrote a letter on her behalf to the POSOM's GF.

I told everyone that would listen.

So far, it's worked out really well for me - all things considered.


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## vellocet (Oct 18, 2013)

Fenix said:


> Revenge becomes problematic when there are children involved.


Depends on what form the revenge takes.

What is truly problematic for children is when one of their parents can't keep it in his pants, or can't keep her legs close for other people.


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## brokeneric (Jan 27, 2014)

vellocet said:


> I also believe in getting even with a WS in some non-violent way.


Make love, not war- zeFlood117 style.


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## Racer (Sep 24, 2009)

Harken Banks said:


> Racer seems to have made a study of this.


lol... Lots of ways to extract your two lbs of flesh. Sandbox rules.

For crazies like me, what better revenge than staying and her having to face daily a tormented soul knowing she’s ‘the one’ who broke him? Hell, maybe it’s to restore the marriage, have her fall back in love with you and just throw it away when the first piece of strange is offered to you? Maybe it’s to drive her deep down into a pit.. And as she struggles to the rim, you throw some rocks at her and watch her slip back down? It might even be burning it all down to the ground just to see what might grow out of the ruins... 

Whatever floats your boat so you don’t drown and establish who needs the rescuing. You can always change. That you do control. 

And whatever you do decide to do, your WS should have to struggle, should have to find strength of character to survive, should have to react to you, and should feel ramifications so when the next opportunity presents itself, they’ll have some very strong negative feelings about a very unsettling future if they say “take me”. It just can’t be ‘fear’ that stops them. It has to be something they want to decide for themselves and who they are now.	Your goal is to get them to see who they were as a horrible thing and take pride and ego at far they’ve grown. 

There must be a carrot too instead of just the stick; Feed their growth by feeding that insatiable ego.


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## RNS (Apr 6, 2013)

I am sorry to say the while my ex is now all on her own, I did somethings that made the OM unavailable for a while  I have had a range of feelings on this as at fist it made me happy, then guilty, then angry .... now it is just what happened. You do not play with other men's wife's. Yes I know she is more to blame that he was, but .... 

I am the last person that would harbor ill will. Though I know that this was one temptation I was handed and could not pass on. I have separated myself from him (and all of that) and do not dwell on it ... (maybe because it worked). 

So for those that feel the need to do the same, I do not blame you.


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## not recognizable (Mar 19, 2011)

vellocet said:


> I also believe in getting even with a WS in some non-violent way.
> 
> But revenge cheating wouldn't be one of them because I'd just be stooping to the cheaters level, would become no better than them, and wouldn't be a decent man any good woman should want. A cheater is a cheater.


Class AND backbone. :toast:


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## lostmyreligion (Oct 18, 2013)

Q: How many lead guitar players does it take to change a light 
bulb?

A: Fifty - one to change it and forty nine to sit around and say 
"I can do it better"

Great lead break Flood. Masterful and entertaining as all hell!
You made me smile about a subject that usually leaves me feeling pretty grim


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

russell28 said:


> If you're divorced, and you're obsessing on getting revenge, or hurting your ex... you're actually hurting yourself. So in this case, he hurt himself by doing the opposite of the 180, and being so attached to his ex that he's out boinking her OM's ex, to try to hurt her.. if he really cares about his ex that much, he probably should go sleep with her and just be done with it. I doubt her or her OM are hurt, they are probably thinking it's good, they can have less guilt..


I must disagree. 

He got his much needed *closure*, and that's what revenge can provide for *some* who are not reconciling. Not everyone may need to get their closure in this way, but for some, revenge provides closure and helps them move on with their lives.


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

revenge is under rated!!!!!!!

there are many way to get revenge. 

1)living well.
2) eye for an eye


I prefer the two pronged aproach.


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## The Middleman (Apr 30, 2012)

russell28 said:


> The best revenge is to stay faithful in R.. By going out and having a revenge affair, you are basically saying you're an immature selfish individual too, and you can also make stupid life choices and have no boundaries. You're also saying that you're a liar, and a cheater, and then what, blame them? Sound familiar?
> 
> Don't change who you are, because somebody does you wrong.. it may change you in ways, but don't let it tear apart your moral fiber and make you become what they were.
> 
> Now, if you talk about it, go to Vegas, make it legal and use protection.. I could see where it might be good to allow the BS to get some strange, without abusing anyone, spouse or AP (whoever they suck into the revenge affair).. I should book a trip to the bunny ranch now that I'm thinking abou..tit...


Sorry Russell, but I can't agree with you. To be honest, if I reconciled (which I wouldn't, by the way) without getting some form of revenge, I'd never be able to look at myself in the mirror again. I'd view myself as a fool who was "had" and allowed her to get away with it "scott free". Sorry, my sense of self respect won't allow for it. That's my personality, and I know ME well.

Please note that I didn't say 'Revenge Affair' in my posting, I said 'Revenge'. A revenge affair is one viable form of revenge in my opinion. So is wide exposure as well as a public humiliation. If my WS still wanted to reconcile with me after one of those or what ever form of "revenge" I took, then I would say: "that is a really remorseful FWS".  If not ... then there was never any remorse there in the first place. But for me to do nothing at all except to forgive would make me weak, IMO (and I'm only talking for myself, no one else).

Sorry if I offend anyone, but any WS who reconciles from within the comfort of an existing marriage, without experiencing some of the same pain they put their BS's through, IS getting away with their affair "scott free".


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## The Middleman (Apr 30, 2012)

chillymorn said:


> revenge is under rated!!!!!!!
> 
> there are many way to get revenge.
> 
> ...


One for each eye?


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## 2ntnuf (Jul 14, 2012)

The main issues I see is doing it in a legal fashion and not destroying yourself, in the process. As much as I would, at one time, have loved to get some sort of revenge and still would smile at some long-term problems OM might have in his life, unrelated to me, I just don't know that it's worth it, for me. I've had the eyes of the world on me for too long. I would be the first person the authorities would come to in the case of anything happening. 

What I know about my own life is, "what goes around comes around". I can pretty much guarantee that he, nor she will get away with anything, and I don't have to do anything, but work on myself. I just have to live as happily as I can. That's the best reward. It's all I ever wanted. There are other things which can make a person happy than just one woman. It's part of placing that person in the correct importance in my life. 

Neither of them need to be in my life. They have their own and I don't have to be in their life, either. It's the best way for me. I'll stick to it. That doesn't mean I won't have to vent at times. We all hurt.


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## MadMax (Jan 31, 2014)

I've been listening to some HU songs. I find them calming.

Hollywood Undead - "Outside" (Official Lyric Video) - YouTube


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## Lovemytruck (Jul 3, 2012)

Revenge is not necessarily for everyone, but there are definately some possitive effects!

Revenge doesn't have to be an RA, but in some cases the stronger medicine is justifiable.

Those chosing to R might be best served with the "stooping to their level" arguement. It would further destabilize the marriage.

How about guys like me that chose D against the wishes of a WW? The D says to hell with you, I am going to find someone else. Then we do find someone else. I think there is a revenge factor in that. I support it 100% when D is the result of a betrayal.

Different people have different needs. If a BS evens the score, and an innocent 3rd party is not hurt by it, good for them and their healing. 

A secondary benefit to a WS would be a better understanding of what cheating feels like when it happens to you. Hopefully they might realize how sh!tty their own behavior as been.


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## adriana (Dec 21, 2013)

adriana said:


> Success is the best revenge.





MadMax said:


> I don't know if that's enough.
> 
> ... virtuous vengeance rests on the foundational principle that ‘the very
> concept of a wrong or evil action entails that it should be met with a hostile response. - Peter A. French



I'm sorry but I don't believe that you can actually have any kind of "meaningful" revenge without some sort of maintainable success in life. After all, acts of revenge based on vengefulness, despite that they undoubtedly have some therapeutic effect, are nothing more than acts of desperation caused by pain and agony.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

TheFlood117 said:


> A few weeks ago I screwed OM's STBXW.
> 
> What can I say, I felt 'entitled'. Poor thing. I don't think she ever got done that good before.
> 
> ...


No more emotional hurt and humiliation?


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## Jung_admirer (Jun 26, 2013)

MadMax said:


> ''Revenge can be a very good deterrent to bad behavior, and *bring feelings of completeness and fulfillment*.'' said Dr. Michael McCullough, a psychologist at the University of Miami.


Nonsense. Revenge can fulfill you the same way a bully feels fulfilled by tormenting others. It is a shallow externalization. That said, bringing on that kind of firepower causes cowards to soil themselves ... and I have to believe that must deter bad behavior.


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

adriana said:


> I'm sorry but I don't believe that you can actually have any kind of "meaningful" revenge without some sort of maintainable success in life. After all, acts of revenge based on vengefulness, despite that they undoubtedly have some therapeutic effect, are nothing more than acts of desperation caused by pain and agony.


I would agree that success in life is essential but revenge, done correctly, destroys your target not you.

Cheaters have already destroyed themselves, all anyone has to do is take advantage of their extremely foolish actions.

Cheaters are weak.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## love=pain (Nov 26, 2012)

TheFlood117 said:


> Nope. She is not wife anymore. And he is not her husband. I am not reconciling so it was not a true "revenge affair". Now, I did take pleasure in it. I mean, c'mon what man wouldn't? It just happened. I actually went over there cause she told me she needed to talk about "them" asap. I went there thinking there was more to it or they were planning to run off together or some crazy sh!t. But then it just happened. She knew what she wanted and she got it. I will never tell my ex. Ever.
> 
> The repercussions of my ex wife and her ex husbands affair is on them. Part of that is you lose people that once loved you more than anything in the world. When similarly damaged people have commonalities and their both attractive and like sex, things happen. We both probably have some un-resolved issues even tho the marriages are over.


No harm there IMO if anything you both needed a boost to your self esteem, if you had decided to R and then cheated that would make you no better than your WS.
I actually know some folks the wife cheated on the husband with his good friend, so the husband let the OM wife know and they hooked up next thing you know they switched houses his wife and the om took up residence and the husband moved in with the OM wife. They divorced then remarried the other's spouses pretty weird not sure if they all are still together it's been several years ago.
If you decide *not* to R then all bets are off what's the difference if you screw the OM's wife_as long as she is going to D as well)or a hundred others that's your choice.
Even if your D is not final yet I still don't see a problem, the marriage was over when they cheated all you are doing is confirming it.


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