# I guess it's done



## Dewayne76 (Sep 26, 2012)

My wife use to say "Honey, I love you, I will ALWAYS love you, but I don't love you like 'that' right now"

Yesterday, after eating supper with the girls. I got home and we were calmly talking. One, she was upset when I made her think I had paid a lawyer. Then, we were talking later and she said a few more phrases. 

"I just don't love you anymore...I'm sorry" I said "at all?" Her: "no, not really"

Then I was asking her about all the time prior to the kids showing up about how she would come to me and tell me how happy she was and how much she loved me and how I'd better not leave her... She said "Because at that particular time I was happy and thot my life was going in a good direction. Those were happy times for me... but I don't want that anymore. I don't want YOU to make me feel that way"

Yeah, even trying my 180 and doing ok, that hurt. Tons. I didn't break down then, and I'm proud of myself. But I don't believe her, not really. She was too happy before the teens showed up. It was like a light switch. 

She still wants to take the kiddo ToTing on Halloween. Should I go with them? Or go to a friends bonfire that a nice and pretty girl wants me to go to? 


I'm still very much hurt. I'm getting over her but it still hurts. Please post your thoughts, I need support now, and I think it's gonna get worse before it gets better. Here lately I've been very full of emotion...


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## SCsweety81 (Sep 27, 2012)

Dewayne76 said:


> Then I was asking her about all the time prior to the kids showing up about how she would come to me and tell me how happy she was and how much she loved me and how I'd better not leave her... She said "Because at that particular time I was happy and thot my life was going in a good direction. Those were happy times for me... but I don't want that anymore. I don't want YOU to make me feel that way"


She's a child, and a lazy one, at that.

Leave her be. Let her fall face first in her own shiz.

Divide up the T or T time, with the kid. You get her first, take her down a couple of streets, hand her off to Mom, and peace out to your bonfire.


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## lostinspaces (Oct 22, 2012)

Dewayne - It is amazing how much a few words can set you back, i know the feeling. 

"Living well is the best revenge" - George Herbert


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## wiigirl (Jun 14, 2012)

SCsweety81 said:


> She's a child, and a lazy one, at that.
> 
> Leave her be. Let her fall face first in her own shiz.
> 
> Divide up the T or T time, with the kid. You get her first, take her down a couple of streets, hand her off to Mom, and peace out to your bonfire.


:iagree:








_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Dewayne76 (Sep 26, 2012)

This girl is so into me. Already talking about ... things that we shouldn't. She's very pretty, YOUNG... but I'm not looking for long term relationship or anything.... just to ...feel better? I guess. 

But I don't even "want" her... all I can keep thinking about is the wife. How do you get over this? I can't bring myself to hate her. I've tried. I've cussed at her, everything I could think of. I just can't hate her. 

Another thing she said that bothers me is... use to she would say "If I could go back I'd tell you that I wasn't happy with this or that" But yesterday she kept saying "If I could go back, I'd left sooner"... OUCH. I STILL don't feel this is true. My "other" therapist is saying to NOT listen to what she's saying. Said to think back to the 180... don't listen to anything they say and believe 50% of what I see. 
Don't know. Even pulling away... I still feel so much hurt.


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## tom67 (Oct 2, 2012)

Dewayne76 said:


> This girl is so into me. Already talking about ... things that we shouldn't. She's very pretty, YOUNG... but I'm not looking for long term relationship or anything.... just to ...feel better? I guess.
> 
> But I don't even "want" her... all I can keep thinking about is the wife. How do you get over this? I can't bring myself to hate her. I've tried. I've cussed at her, everything I could think of. I just can't hate her.
> 
> ...


Go out with her have a good time nothing too serious for now be upfront and honest who knows maybe......


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## BigMac (Oct 29, 2012)

Dewayne76 said:


> This girl is so into me. Already talking about ... things that we shouldn't. She's very pretty, YOUNG... but I'm not looking for long term relationship or anything.... just to ...feel better? I guess.
> 
> But I don't even "want" her... all I can keep thinking about is the wife. How do you get over this? I can't bring myself to hate her. I've tried. I've cussed at her, everything I could think of. I just can't hate her.


I think you needed a proof you're still " in business " , that the girls still want you ,that you can find new love etc. 
I did the same, registered on an dating site and got 3 dates in 2 weeks, but I know for my self I'm not ready yet to jump in another girls bed .
But I admit, it does feel good , I toke it as a compliment


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## Dewayne76 (Sep 26, 2012)

Yeah, I'm apparantly still in the game. I mean this girl is really into me and she's good looking. Young, but good looking. I've about had my fill of "younger" girls. BUT... I know what this is also!! 

I still hurt. A lot. Even when I try to watch porn to get out of my... um..."lonely" spells... I can't do it! I don't watch much porn as it is... but good gawd, I can't even enjoy it because of this. I either think of "us" or "them"

The ONLY time I'm ok.. is when I'm with Brittany, my friend. 

I did notice... night before last, my wife wanted me to go eat with her and jojo (kiddo). SO I did. Last night, prior to me going to Brittany's.. (she knew about it) She asked me "It's early, would you like to go with me to get Jordan and go hang at Mcdonalds and let her play and get a bite?"

I said "Nah, I gotta meet up with Brittany" lol. Then she txted me on her own 3 x's last night. My replies were 2 of 3. Which were: "are you in pain?" and "Ok" lol. I"M SOOOO PROUD OF MYSELF! lol. .... but I still hurt.


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