# Found out Husband on dating app and dating



## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

In a nutshell, married for 25 years, I knew we had problems a few years in as my tone of voice was horrible. I noticed my husband withdrawing from me, not hugging, touching me kissing me, even during sex, that was maybe 15 years into the marriage, but hoped it would change.

Then 10 months ago things came to a halt. His withdrawal was too strong to ignore. I suspect he got himself emotionally ready to end the marriage, as he admitted that he told his parent he wanted out two years ago. He stopped speaking and answering my questions of if he wanted to separate. He literally ghosted me while we were living in the house.

We still slept together but no affection. He must’ve started the dating app sometime in February 2020, if not earlier. He lied to me saying he is not seeing anyone as I became suspicious that he wasn’t responsive to wanting to work through it.

I also became really depressed during this time as I took all the blame and couldn’t understand why any changes I made weren’t working for him.

Fast forward I had no choice but to move out as he was unwilling to do any work in the marriage. He actually forced me out with his behavior. He told me then that he is unsure if he wants to see other people. However my daughter somehow saw a flash from a dating app on his phone, a month prior, which he denied having. He even showed us the phone. Now a month into the living apart he came over to have sex three times. The first time I initiated because I missed him so much the other times he initiated. We never talked about the marriage, and our sex was really just a transaction. I felt horrible after because I knew I’m being used. Now my daughter found out a few days ago while going through his phone he is going on a date today, with some other woman who has three kids, just divorced but still lives with the ex husband. He lied to her about the state of our marriage saying he last slept with me 5 months ago.

I have not confronted him that I know about it. He just lied a few days ago when I asked if he is seeing other people. I am now emotionally over him and ready for divorce. 

27 years down the drain. He previously told me he only stayed with me to raise our daughter and now she is grown and it’s over. I’m just beyond hurt and betrayal. I never thought in a million years my marriage would this way and now I have to get tested.


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## ABHale (Jan 3, 2016)

Sorry you are going through this.

He is wrong for the cheating.

By what you are saying, your marriage has been dead for years. The time to have fixed this was when he first started pulling away.


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

Thank you, yes it was and I failed to recognize the signs and the attempts I made were rebuffed by him.


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## ABHale (Jan 3, 2016)

How long was it from the time he started to pull away it you started to try and fix things?

My wife took me for granted. She started not wanting to do date night or weekend get aways. This went on for years. Our marriage is basically dead now.

Now that I am done trying, she all of a sudden wants to fix it. There is a saying, to little to late. We hardly talk most of the time but still have good days every now and then.


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## Hoosier (May 17, 2011)

So what are you going to do? What do you want to do? Are you going to continue to be his convienient side piece while he hunts around? If that is what you want, ok, but be aware of how he sees it. 
Divorce seems the logical move.


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## Nasman (Dec 15, 2019)

Honestly, divorce seems like the logical move. You have already moved out and it seems like he is ready to move on. If you absolutely want to save the marriage I suggest you tell him that and try counseling. If he says no or his hesitant I would lean on probably divorcing him.


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

ABHale said:


> How long was it from the time he started to pull away it you started to try and fix things?
> 
> My wife took me for granted. She started not wanting to do date night or weekend get aways. This went on for years. Our marriage is basically dead now.
> 
> Now that I am done trying, she all of a sudden wants to fix it. There is a saying, to little to late. We hardly talk most of the time but still have good days every now and then.


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

Yes he said the same, I took him for granted. It became a loveless marriage. I actively tried to go with him to marriage counseling a year ago and he repeatedly said it is now my problem not him. He doesn’t need to change. I didn’t know that he was most likely already cheating by then, that’s why he didn’t want to go it was over in his mind a long time ago.
What makes you stay with your wife considering the state you are in?


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## GC1234 (Apr 15, 2020)

I think you have no choice here but to get divorced. For him it seems to have run it's course, and without passing judgement, I think he's making it clear what he doesn't want anymore. To hang on to this would be wasted energy on your part.


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

Yes, it’s over. I was never faced with cheating in this marriage until I found out just now. It’s still hard for me to process as I was sitting there readily available to him as he knew I would do anything to have him back. For him to lie and not be honest to say yes I’ve been on a dating app having sex it’s just crushing. I knew he said he wasn’t sure if he wants to see other people but that he was already doing and kept lying I am just emotionally exhausted and feel totally betrayed. I could’ve accepted his honesty not this. Now I have to confront him.


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

Hoosier said:


> So what are you going to do? What do you want to do? Are you going to continue to be his convienient side piece while he hunts around? If that is what you want, ok, but be aware of how he sees it.
> Divorce seems the logical move.


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

No I will not and since I know this I will tell him I am done and ready for divorce. I am done. He probably won’t react much since he is already over me, but I’m still scared and confused.


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## ABHale (Jan 3, 2016)

Claudi said:


> Yes he said the same, I took him for granted. It became a loveless marriage. I actively tried to go with him to marriage counseling a year ago and he repeatedly said it is now my problem not him. He doesn’t need to change. I didn’t know that he was most likely already cheating by then, that’s why he didn’t want to go it was over in his mind a long time ago.
> What makes you stay with your wife considering the state you are in?


My youngest just graduated high school and is starting college. I also can’t afford to run two house holds. I also have a job that I am never home that much. So no real need to do anything.

I told her 4 years ago I was done and she could have a divorce any time she wanted, just don’t cheat. She said she wanted the marriage and said she would fight for it. I just haven’t seen her really fight for it. Intimacy has increased but no real one on one time, time for one another is what I asked for.

So now I am job hunting. When I find a job that suits me, I will take it. I will let her know where I will be and to have a nice life. I do still care about her wellbeing but I am no longer in love with her.


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

It’s a difficult situation and I pray she will change to make it work.


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## GC1234 (Apr 15, 2020)

Claudi said:


> Yes, it’s over. I was never faced with cheating in this marriage until I found out just now. It’s still hard for me to process as I was sitting there readily available to him as he knew I would do anything to have him back. For him to lie and not be honest to say yes I’ve been on a dating app having sex it’s just crushing. I knew he said he wasn’t sure if he wants to see other people but that he was already doing and kept lying I am just emotionally exhausted and feel totally betrayed. I could’ve accepted his honesty not this. Now I have to confront him.


But are you sure he is having an affair? How do you know for sure his dates are sexual in nature?


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

You are right, since I still have not confronted him I don’t know. I only know what my daughter found on his phone, where he said he was in a process of a divorce and new to this dating app thing and wants to meet up with this 10 year younger woman. Asking her what she wants with an old man like him. Just thinking about all this is breaking me down. He also mentioned that Corona is a terrible time since he is lonely or something like that. He knew all along that I am hoping to reconcile but he is out there texting other women. She found he messaged someone else as well but that lady hasn’t responded. It’s unclear how long he has been doing it and if he actually slept with anyone. But my intuition says he has.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Claudi said:


> In a nutshell, married for 25 years, I knew we had problems a few years in as my tone of voice was horrible. I noticed my husband withdrawing from me, not hugging, touching me kissing me, even during sex, that was maybe 15 years into the marriage, but hoped it would change.
> 
> Then 10 months ago things came to a halt. His withdrawal was too strong to ignore. I suspect he got himself emotionally ready to end the marriage, as he admitted that he told his parent he wanted out two years ago. He stopped speaking and answering my questions of if he wanted to separate. He literally ghosted me while we were living in the house.
> 
> ...


OK. when you say your tone of voice was horrible, what do you mean? Exactly how horrible was it? Why was your tone of voice horrible?

Did you change your tone of voice from horrible to nice? Did you apologise to your husband for your horrible tone of voice?

What did you do to address the issues that you identify your tone of voice caused?

Was it only your tone of voice that was "off?"

I am a little confused. It's almost as if you suddenly found yourself using a horrible tone of voice without actually being aware you were doing it?

If your husband is cheating that is wrong, obviously.

Can your marriage be saved? That's possible, but doubtful, if your husband isn't willing to visit a counsellor with you. However, I suggest that you visiting a counsellor for individual counselling might be of benefit to you.

How is your daughter coping?


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## GC1234 (Apr 15, 2020)

Claudi said:


> You are right, since I still have not confronted him I don’t know. I only know what my daughter found on his phone, where he said he was in a process of a divorce and new to this dating app thing and wants to meet up with this 10 year younger woman. Asking her what she wants with an old man like him. Just thinking about all this is breaking me down. He also mentioned that Corona is a terrible time since he is lonely or something like that. He knew all along that I am hoping to reconcile but he is out there texting other women. She found he messaged someone else as well but that lady hasn’t responded. It’s unclear how long he has been doing it and if he actually slept with anyone. But my intuition says he has.


Seems to me that he is making excuses to justify the behavior with the Coronavirus. Do yourself a favor, you've set a great example for your children on sticking around and trying everything, now it might be time to teach them about your self-respect. If he doesn't want to work on the marriage, then it's time for him to go. I'm trying to understand though, are there reasons why he withdrew years ago?


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## phillybeffandswiss (Jan 20, 2013)

GC1234 said:


> But are you sure he is having an affair? How do you know for sure his dates are sexual in nature?


It doesn’t have to be sexual too be an affair. He withdrew communication and emotional support to share with another or other women. That’s an affair. So, it is fine for her to assume it is sexual, it would change very little if anything at all.


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## GC1234 (Apr 15, 2020)

phillybeffandswiss said:


> It doesn’t have to be sexual to be an affair. He withdrew communication and emotional support to share with another or other women. That’s an affair. So, it is fine for her to assume it is sexual, it would change very little if anything at all.


No, of course it doesn't have to be sexual to be an affair, but a lawyer (his or hers) may think differently. So it's always good to know for sure and to have proof of it.


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

I spoke to a lawyer and since we’ve been married for 25 years adultery would really only matter if I want spousal support which I don’t. I just want what I am entitled too once the divorce starts which is retirement. He mentioned a few month ago when we divorce we both just keep what we have and we should be good. I thought I think not.


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

MattMatt said:


> OK. when you say your tone of voice was horrible, what do you mean? Exactly how horrible was it? Why was your tone of voice horrible?
> 
> Did you change your tone of voice from horrible to nice? Did you apologise to your husband for your horrible tone of voice?
> 
> ...


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

I tend to easily become frustrated with things and it shows in my tone which can be very nasty. I knew it was an issue and I also didn’t take criticism well. We argued a lot and I honestly was unhappy for numerous years myself although I’ve never cheated. When I tried to make changes it was too late. I wrote an apology letter which he did not accept. My daughter is hurt that she had to find the messages. She tried to tell me he was doing something and I should’ve listend and investigated it myself. However as I told her I previously never had a reason to be suspicious. She also was not privy to a lot of the issues since she was away at College during most of this. But he did take off his wedding band in October and everyone I asked him about he ignored me. But she is strong, she knows we both love her. 
He refused to go to counseling and I ended up in counseling myself. I realize now he is trying to punish me with his behavior by cheating and to justify it to himself that I was not listening all these years.


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

GC1234 said:


> Seems to me that he is making excuses to justify the behavior with the Coronavirus. Do yourself a favor, you've set a great example for your children on sticking around and trying everything, now it might be time to teach them about your self-respect. If he doesn't want to work on the marriage, then it's time for him to go. I'm trying to understand though, are there reasons why he withdrew years ago?


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

He can’t even give me a clear example at this point other than it’s all my fault I didn’t listen to him when he told me. I realize at this point it’s all on him. He wants out and have fun while making me hope he might come back. But now since I know he is seeing people on a dating app screw him.


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## GC1234 (Apr 15, 2020)

Claudi said:


> He can’t even give me a clear example at this point other than it’s all my fault I didn’t listen to him when he told me. I realize at this point it’s all on him. He wants out and have fun while making me hope he might come back. But now since I know he is seeing people on a dating app screw him.


I completely agree! Also, it doesn't seem right that he's blaming you for it. What does he mean, you didn't listen to him when he told you? What did he say?


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

That is the issue, simply that I don’t listen to him and he has told me so many times in the past about it. I texted him a few hours ago telling we can make it easy and file for a mutual consent divorce. All he texted back was to say please. I realized he didn’t pick up his phone or say anything else because he was on his date he had scheduled this evening.


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## GC1234 (Apr 15, 2020)

Wow, that's disappointing. Well, at least you know where you stand, and I think in time you will be much happier. This is just energy-draining for you, I would imagine. Just try to make sure your kids don't know too much about the details...


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## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

Claudi said:


> Yes, it’s over. I was never faced with cheating in this marriage until I found out just now. It’s still hard for me to process as I was sitting there readily available to him as he knew I would do anything to have him back. For him to lie and not be honest to say yes I’ve been on a dating app having sex it’s just crushing. I knew he said he wasn’t sure if he wants to see other people but that he was already doing and kept lying I am just emotionally exhausted and feel totally betrayed. I could’ve accepted his honesty not this. Now I have to confront him.


He came to have sex with you to keep you as his plan B while he goes and tries out for Plan A model. Your marriage has been dead for a long time. Get a great lawyer, get some counselling for yourself and move on from this man. Do not be his Plan B. Do not confront him till you have all your ducks in a row. Get the lawyer, sort out the finances, etc. Get a copy of whatever documents you need from the house, cause once you present divorce it could get ugly. 

He is obviously a coward pushing you in this direction. Make sure you tell your daughter, family, friends everyone. He should have done the right thing, asked for divorce and then started dating. Tell everyone he has been cheating on you since some time ago (Feb etc) that you know of. Dont let it appear as if you left and he was free so he gets off smelling squeaky clean. Say you left because he was cheating and didn't want to work on the marriage. 

how old is your daughter?


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Claudi said:


> In a nutshell, married for 25 years, I knew we had problems a few years in as my tone of voice was horrible. I noticed my husband withdrawing from me, not hugging, touching me kissing me, even during sex, that was maybe 15 years into the marriage, but hoped it would change.
> 
> Then 10 months ago things came to a halt. His withdrawal was too strong to ignore. I suspect he got himself emotionally ready to end the marriage, as he admitted that he told his parent he wanted out two years ago. He stopped speaking and answering my questions of if he wanted to separate. He literally ghosted me while we were living in the house.
> 
> ...


I am sorry for you and I know this is painful but it's good you accepted the fact that your marriage is over and he has moved on. Sounds like he has been doing that for a long time, not saying it's right to cheat. You have a right to be hurt by that. That just sucks. It's really a shame he didn't have the courage to tell you he was done and leave with dignity. 

You acknowledge as well that you made some mistakes in how you treated him. I got to say nothing will kill a mans love for his wife quicker then if she belittles him with her words. There are better more constructive less passive aggressive ways to work on problems in your marriage. Try to learn from that, again not saying it's right to be on dating apps while still married. But if he didn't do that and just told you he was done, then our take would be about the things you say you did to contribute to his wanting to exit the marriage. It's healthy to as some point figure that out. That doesn't excuse his cheating. Cheating is not about the marriage but about character. Maybe he has been cheating a lot longer even. He wouldn't be the first. But even that doesn't matter now unless you want to make yourself more miserable.

You need to file for divorce and stop your daughter from any more investigating on his phone and such. Don't turn this into a good guy bad guy thing, and try to pit her against him. Not saying you are doing that but honestly she shouldn't be this involved in your marriage. That is YOUR marriage but he is still HER father. Again I am not saying he is right at all, but I AM saying don't encourage her to take actions that might contribute to hurting her relationship with her Father even with the best of intentions. He is going to be her father forever. It's hard but take the high road, even if it's just to keep the peace. I know it doesn't feel like it now, but you will appreciate that when your daughter gets married one day and it's easier for everyone to be around each other. I say this as someone who is very aware that my cheating Father was a lousy Husband to my Mom but a good Father to me. And whose parents basically are forced to be together at holidays because my Sister said, we are no longer splitting the day you guys need to coexist. And they do, it isn't even hard for my Mom she sees him for what he is and wouldn't want to be with him. I know my Mom was the honorable one in the marriage. That is enough. You know he is lying you don't need any more information. Again the marriage is over now. He will be free to date anyone he wants and so will you by the way, when you are ready.

Also he should just be honest with you and he should stop using you for sex but you also kind of established the boundaries for this when you slept with him the first time. You say yourself that you initiated that one, so you started the pattern and you can stop that too. Besides it's not healthy to act like you are trying to fix the marriage anymore when he is actively dating. Time to create distance. 

I'm sorry that this post is mostly about stuff you should do, and it may not seem that sympathetic, I am really trying to help you with steps you can take to make your life easier as you move on, but I know this is very hard for you and I am sorry for that. Look, it's going to be painful for a while but you must move on, and you know what you can still have a wonderful life. Marriages end but your life didn't. You can still and will have joy. I promise you that.

It's time for you to accept the reality as painful as it is and move forward with your life.


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

GC1234 said:


> Wow, that's disappointing. Well, at least you know where you stand, and I think in time you will be much happier. This is just energy-draining for you, I would imagine. Just try to make sure your kids don't know too much about the details...


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

Well too late for that since it was my daughter who found all the messages. Now she is worried that her dad will take the divorce a lot harder although he is the one seeing people.


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

sokillme said:


> I am sorry for you and I know this is painful but it's good you accepted the fact that your marriage is over and he has moved on. Sounds like he has been doing that for a long time, not saying it's right to cheat. You have a right to be hurt by that. That just sucks. It's really a shame he didn't have the courage to tell you he was done and leave with dignity.
> 
> You acknowledge as well that you made some mistakes in how you treated him. I got to say nothing will kill a mans love for his wife quicker then if she belittles him with her words. There are better more constructive less passive aggressive ways to work on problems in your marriage. Try to learn from that, again not saying it's right to be on dating apps while still married. But if he didn't do that and just told you he was done, then our take would be about the things you say you did to contribute to his wanting to exit the marriage. It's healthy to as some point figure that out. That doesn't excuse his cheating. Cheating is not about the marriage but about character. Maybe he has been cheating a lot longer even. He wouldn't be the first. But even that doesn't matter now unless you want to make yourself more miserable.
> 
> ...


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

I have been actively telling my daughter to stop snooping and leave his phone alone. I am not in the house anymore so all I can do is keep telling her to stop. I have been encouraging her to focus on things that she needs to complete in her life and that we will handle this and not her. She knows her father loves her very much and that is how she is coping.
I dont bad mouth him I try to rationalize his behavior to her and why we ended up where we are. But he will be the one who will have to address that in the end with her. 
I slept with him because he is my husband and I didn’t know he was on an app talking to people. Had I known this I would’ve never ever let him touch me again. I am not out there like he is trying to hook up with others. I will have to be celibate because I am not planning on finding someone else.


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## GC1234 (Apr 15, 2020)

Claudi said:


> I have been actively telling my daughter to stop snooping and leave his phone alone. I am not in the house anymore so all I can do is keep telling her to stop. I have been encouraging her to focus on things that she needs to complete in her life and that we will handle this and not her. She knows her father loves her very much and that is how she is coping.
> I dont bad mouth him I try to rationalize his behavior to her and why we ended up where we are. But he will be the one who will have to address that in the end with her.
> I slept with him because he is my husband and I didn’t know he was on an app talking to people. Had I known this I would’ve never ever let him touch me again. I am not out there like he is trying to hook up with others. I will have to be celibate because I am not planning on finding someone else.


It's alright...don't beat yourself up over sleeping with him. I mean he is/was your husband after all. Consider it a lesson learned. That's a good attitude to have about not worrying about finding anyone else. It may happen, it may not, but don't worry about it. Work on you and your well-being.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Claudi said:


> I have been actively telling my daughter to stop snooping and leave his phone alone. I am not in the house anymore so all I can do is keep telling her to stop. I have been encouraging her to focus on things that she needs to complete in her life and that we will handle this and not her. She knows her father loves her very much and that is how she is coping.
> I dont bad mouth him I try to rationalize his behavior to her and why we ended up where we are. But he will be the one who will have to address that in the end with her.
> I slept with him because he is my husband and I didn’t know he was on an app talking to people. Had I known this I would’ve never ever let him touch me again. I am not out there like he is trying to hook up with others. I will have to be celibate because I am not planning on finding someone else.


That all sounds very good. I know it's probably hard to take the high road like you are doing as far as your daughter but I think you will see it will pay off in the end. I also understand why you slept with him those times, I am just saying you will have to establish other boundaries.

Overall it sounds like you are doing really good. This is just going to suck for you for a while. Eventually you need to give yourself permission to have some hope for a better life. It will happen.


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

sokillme said:


> That all sounds very good. I know it's probably hard to take the high road like you are doing as far as your daughter but I think you will see it will pay off in the end. I also understand why you slept with him those times, I am just saying you will have to establish other boundaries.
> 
> Overall it sounds like you are doing really good. This is just going to suck for you for a while. Eventually you need to give yourself permission to have some hope for a better life.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Can I ask why you are quoting in one response and posting in another? If you ht the reply button it should put the quote in there for you.

You can then type after that.

You can also hit the three dots on the top right then select edit. That will let you add or change text in existing posts. Then you just click save.


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

I am up and down with my emotions. I’ve been grieving the end of this relationship for 10 months but I knew it was dead for a very long time. I just couldn’t let go because I am afraid of what life is like without him after 27 years. I have no family here so I am basically left to fend for myself. Thank God I have employment. But I also am embarrassed, humiliated and in a way ashamed that he started cheating to get out and is on an app. Who knows what people that we know saw him on there but didn’t say anything to me. I thought he would have much more honor than that.


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

sokillme said:


> Can I ask why you are quoting in one response and posting in another? If you ht the reply button it should put the quote in there for you.
> 
> You can then type after that.
> 
> You can also hit the three dots on the top right then select edit. That will let you add or change text in existing posts. Then you just click save.


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

Im so new to this I am not sure how to reply but will follow your advice.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

😳😂

Are you trying to hit the like button maybe? Are you on your phone?

If you are in a browser the reply button is on the left on under the text of the post, there is also a like button and a quote button for multi quoting.


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## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

Claudi said:


> Im so new to this I am not sure how to reply but will follow your advice.


Click on “reply” and that will give you the space below to answer.

Ending a long marriage is never easy but sometimes you find yourself there. I hope all goes well for you.


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

I guess 😂 I don’t know what I am doing, ugh.


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

aine said:


> He came to have sex with you to keep you as his plan B while he goes and tries out for Plan A model. Your marriage has been dead for a long time. Get a great lawyer, get some counselling for yourself and move on from this man. Do not be his Plan B. Do not confront him till you have all your ducks in a row. Get the lawyer, sort out the finances, etc. Get a copy of whatever documents you need from the house, cause once you present divorce it could get ugly.
> 
> He is obviously a coward pushing you in this direction. Make sure you tell your daughter, family, friends everyone. He should have done the right thing, asked for divorce and then started dating. Tell everyone he has been cheating on you since some time ago (Feb etc) that you know of. Dont let it appear as if you left and he was free so he gets off smelling squeaky clean. Say you left because he was cheating and didn't want to work on the marriage.
> 
> how old is your daughter?


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Claudi said:


> I am up and down with my emotions. I’ve been grieving the end of this relationship for 10 months but I knew it was dead for a very long time. I just couldn’t let go because I am afraid of what life is like without him after 27 years. I have no family here so I am basically left to fend for myself. Thank God I have employment. But I also am embarrassed, humiliated and in a way ashamed that he started cheating to get out and is on an app. Who knows what people that we know saw him on there but didn’t say anything to me. I thought he would have much more honor than that.


Why are you embarrassed and ashamed, that reflects poorly on him not you. The other thing is half of all marriages end in divorce so it's pretty common, nothing to be embarrassed about. I know that is easy to say. But you should at least try to think that way. One thing you can do is start looking at this as a new beginning. Depending on your daughters age you could think about moving closer to family now. 

It sucks but it doesn't all have to suck.


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

She is 22. I will speak up once the time comes to let people know.


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## Claudi (Jun 24, 2020)

sokillme said:


> Why are you embarrassed and ashamed, that reflects poorly on him not you. The other thing is half of all marriages end in divorce so it's pretty common, nothing to be embarrassed about. I know that is easy to say. But you should at least try to think that way. One thing you can do is start looking at this as a new beginning. Depending on your daughters age you could think about moving closer to family now.
> 
> It sucks but it doesn't all have to suck.


You are right but I can’t move back to family as I am job bound here.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Claudi said:


> You are right but I can’t move back to family as I am job bound here.


Yay! You did it right!

For now right, that's the thing you have much more choices now.

Another thing you showed some qualities about yourself that will help you in your next relationship, especially you willingness to change.


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## Girl_power (Aug 11, 2018)

Buh bye.


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