# Seperated



## britchic80 (Dec 18, 2014)

I am newly separated and feeling a
lot of feelings. I am feeling relief well. I guess i just need advice on how to deal with the rush of emotion.


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## Fenix (Jul 2, 2013)

Just go with it and when the negative emotion becomes overwhelming, go for a run. Don't crawl into a bottle. I did a lot of visualization when I felt the negative spiral start to happen. Taking those negative feelings and mentally pushing them out of my mind, replacing them with positive thoughts.

It is quite the roller coaster you are embarking on. Use the anger (assuming you have some e.g. if your ex was a cheater) to push you forward.

Reach out to friends and supportive family members. Know that in about 18 months, your life will look very, very different and quite possibly, much better.


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## britchic80 (Dec 18, 2014)

thank you


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## Jane139 (Jan 6, 2015)

I separated from my husband three weeks ago. We have been married for twenty years, no kids. The actual separation was kind of sudden, though it had been in my mind for a while. He suggested it; it was kind of what I,was waiting for as I did not want to leave him. He has had a bad year or two, emotionally, as well as some physical health issues. But when he asked, I moved out very quickly.

We have exchanged a few emails, just about bills and stuff and they have been friendly. But I am meeting with a lawyer today, just to see what is best for me. (My state is community property, so I worry about him running up new bills which we would both be liable for.)

Even though we left on friendly terms, it is painful and kind of shocking to be on my own. I guess you have to expect all sorts of moods and emotions for a while and just take care of yourself as best you can. I have a new apartment, so that is a big distraction and change and keeps me occupied. 

Good luck, hope the separation works out for the best. You just have to get through this part now.


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## Chuck71 (Nov 5, 2012)

You will have good days and bad days. After I dropped in the rabbit hole in Dec. '12

and came out around Christmas....I still had moments. Being a guy...we don't cry

but it still hurt. Some days I was a walking corpse. Journaling helps.

I would post here. Maybe private a few I had a lot in common with.

It will get better. A year after the D final...I was on cloud 9 with someone else.


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