# Should I divorce? What is it like?



## amig (Dec 19, 2010)

I've been married for over 20 years, highschool sweetheart, dated over 6 years before marriage. Am considering divorcing my wife. What is divorce like on the kids now in early teens. Over the last 3 years love started dying on my side, I told wife, I offer counseling for both of us to work and improve what seemed to be missing but she does not believe in counseling. After 3 years and without searching I met another woman and over a couple of months have fallen deeply in love with her. I have never done this nor am proud of been married and in love with another woman. I am though and am thinking of divorcing my wife to marry this person. Has nothing to do with sex, is just the connection I feel with this person which I know grass is not greener on other side, nonetheless I feel lonely when not next to her. I can't lie to my wife what should I do? My plans are to marry this new person and be with her for ever. Before you judge, am not proud or happy about this, actually I feel sad and wish I could feel for my wife what am feeling for this woman. Is not fair to my wife for me to be with her not feeling love as I feel and miss this other person. Am not a playboy am a serious man, fell in love once with my current wife and after over 25+ years now am going thru this, so am not a player but a family man having this issue. Please advise. Thanks.


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## olddeer (Nov 1, 2010)

Falling out of love - totally understandable. Looking at others, okay. But to stay in this marriage 'til you found another one, I'm not too sure about that. Why do you have to jump into another relationship? Did you start this one initially by simply talking with her? then she so happen to be the one you could tell her all about the marriage problems? And heh, it just so happen she's then attracted to you?? I'm just trying to figure how this all happened.
I really think you could be playing with fire when you have teenagers. Is it a battlefield in your house between you and your wife? Because then maybe it is better that you are out of there but NOT to run off to another woman. NO WAY!!!! That is so WRONG!! I personally think you have to separate and simply live on your own if you seriously think it's over with your wife and find yourself as a SINGLE man. You've never been there. Don't go to that other woman. Stay away, honestly.


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## akcroy (Dec 23, 2010)

What if you fall out of love with this other woman one day, just as you did with your wife?

You seem to have already decided what you want to do. I have never been divorced, so can't tell what it's like. I believe you should get divorced, not for you but for your wife's sake - she doesn't deserve to be two-timed. Sorry buddy, I feel for you but you knew it was wrong all along.


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