# Ladies...when it comes to ur alone time...



## DALMORE (Jul 21, 2010)

Ladies, when you decide to take an alone day for yourself, for whatever reason. Do you want your husband to not communicate with you, ie., call or text (unless its an emergency)?


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

It never bothered me. This was an issue at one point though. I was participating in some horse shows, and at times had a cell phone nowhere near me. When I would go out to the parking lot later and check messages, I would call him back. He got mad about that. However, at the time I knew he was cheating. I just didn't think his "beef" had any merit. But, to answer your question; it was fine that he called when I was having my alone time.


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## Crypsys (Apr 22, 2010)

I'm not a lady but I know with my wife and I still text each other when we are out doing things without each other.


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## DALMORE (Jul 21, 2010)

If my wife left for alone time, feeling irritated at me. Would any text/call or just let it rest until the wife gets home and then talk about whats on my mind regarding why she was frustrated at me?

or just let her have her time and talk more that night or the next day?


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## lbell629 (May 10, 2010)

He can call whatever, but if I'm not in the mood to talk to him I'll just let it go to vm or save his text to read for later. I only call him when he's out if I need something otherwise I leave him alone...otherwise it kind of defeats the purpose of "alone" time.


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## Crypsys (Apr 22, 2010)

DALMORE said:


> If my wife left for alone time, feeling irritated at me. Would any text/call or just let it rest until the wife gets home and then talk about whats on my mind regarding why she was frustrated at me?


I honestly have no idea. My wife and I will not physically leave anywhere (or even go to sleep) until we have come to a mutual understanding and decision during a fight. Keeping face to face during the issue allows us to work it through together and not put it on the back burner to be forgotten or to allow it to stew and fester. 

So I'm afraid I don't have a good answer for you here.


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

mine will call me all the time, but she wont answer if i call her. she is cell phone challenged, its always "dead" or "in her purse" or "she didnt hear it" blah blah. i always answer mine no matter what. however, i enjoy it when she is gone so i rarely call her


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## brwneyedgrl (Jul 21, 2010)

I kinda like when my hubby sends me a little text to see how I'm doing if I'm having some alone time. It reminds me that he still thinks of me and cares how things are going when I'm not around.


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## workin' (Jun 3, 2010)

To answer the first question...I have no problem with Hubby contacting me. He is usually discreet enough to text, in case I am somewhere where the phone may cause a problem. HOWEVER, he always knows where I am, and with who. 

Since we are having problems now, I would not shrug off him not answering his phone if I call him. Before, he would USUALLY(although he will not agree)not answer his phone, but call me back, usually within minutes.

As for the second post you made...if Hubby left because he was "irritated at me", I would not call, unless a period of time went by, when we had no contact, and it became worrisome. I would have a discussion with him when he returned. He would not take off for a day or day and a half, though.

As we are in marriage therapy, we are learning to settle things, and not let them go.


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## Lucilove (Jul 22, 2010)

Hmmmm....I am OK with normal I miss you texts; however, when he calls me and wants to get into a conversation when he knows it's my scrapbook day with the girls, it deeply annoys me. They are unnecessary calls that could wit and when I tell him I am being rude to my friends, he breaks out the old, "I am your husband, I am more important than them." Whatever!!! Get over yourself! 
That's when my alone-time gets ruined and I am ready for a week off from being married!
Many people don't need the break, I do. I need a day off with my book, even in the same house.


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## greeneyeddolphin (May 31, 2010)

If I'm off for a day, without him and the kids, I don't mind if he calls or texts me every now and then, so long as it's not a constant "when are you going to be home? Where are you? What are you doing? Who are you with?" kind of thing. If one or the other of us were irritated with the other when we parted for the day, no I would not want him to text me about that. To me, that is something best left for when we are face to face and able to sit and talk about it. Texting leaves too much open to interpretation, makes it too easy to think there's a "tone" that isn't really there. And while a phone call allows you to hear the tone and the emotion, I still think face to face is better for those discussions. 

Whether or not you should try to communicate with her while she's out is something you and she should figure out together. What we would want from our significant others may not be what she wants from you.


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## bella09 (Jul 5, 2010)

Personally, it depends on why I'm leaving and where I'm going, but I always will let him know where I am and that I'm ok at the very least. When I go to do stuff for myself on a day that the kids are in school, I love to hear from my husband, to hear about his day and chat for a few or sometimes just a few texts back and forth. I don't ever say don't bother me I'm busy... I know from experience in a past relationship when I didn't want for my ex to call me when I was out or when I didn't answer at all, it was because I was being dishonest about who I was with and didn't want to get caught... I hope that's not the case. Sometimes I just need to get out and go for a drive when I get so stressed being at home if our kids are stressing me out and I'm spinning in circles. So then I'll usually leave and drive around for a little bit (not more than an hour) just to breathe and I don't always answer my phone when my husband calls then, but I'll respond to his texts to let him know I'm ok and just needed to clear my head and gets some peace for a few. We have a 3 & 4yr old that can drive me up a wall too, so my husband is understanding of this. So ultimately I would say it depends on the person, their mood, the situation and all surrounding circumstances of that situation. Even when I'm mad and my husband and I have argued and I leave to take a drive, I still answer the phone to talk to him. I love him too much not to, I know how I would feel if he left and ignored my calls all day, it would suck. That's not why I answer though, I always just want to at least say hi, how's your day been, I miss you and can't wait to see you when you get home.


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