# I need advice



## bgdadx3 (Feb 18, 2016)

6 YRS Ago I caught my wife texting another man. It was a man she worked with. There were some pretty inappropriate texts. I caught them and it stopped. She calmed it was just for attention, so basically I let it go and moved on in my marriage. We have had another child since then, our 3rd. Soon after, he left the company. 5 months ago my wife got a terrific job offer. She told me that the man she had texted works there and that if I didn't want her to take the job, she wouldn't. She assured me they would be in different departments and she wouldn't have any contact with him. I trusted her and told her to take the job. Within 2 weeks of starting there, she was texting him again. This time, she was doing the pursuing and he was not accepting her advances. I caught her again. She claimed that it was just for attention again and that it meant nothing. This time however, I investigated further. I found out that she spent over $125 on a birthday present for him. I found out that she had been leaving him notes on his desk. She was sending him Sexual memes every day. ANDto top it all off I called him and he admitted that 6 years ago she gave him oral sex twice. they both claim that this time was not Physical at all. what I need help with Is - should I ever trust her again? Does it seem like she had real emotion for him? I love her and she claims that she loves me. What should I do? she says that she is sorry and it will never happen again. She said that she loves me and wants to be with me and only me.

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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

bgdadx3 said:


> 6 YRS Ago I caught my wife texting another man. It was a man she worked with. There were some pretty inappropriate texts. I caught them and it stopped. She calmed it was just for attention, so basically I let it go and moved on in my marriage. We have had another child since then, our 3rd. Soon after, he left the company. 5 months ago my wife got a terrific job offer. She told me that the man she had texted works there and that if I didn't want her to take the job, she wouldn't. She assured me they would be in different departments and she wouldn't have any contact with him. I trusted her and told her to take the job. Within 2 weeks of starting there, she was texting him again. This time, she was doing the pursuing and he was not accepting her advances. I caught her again. She claimed that it was just for attention again and that it meant nothing. This time however, I investigated further. I found out that she spent over $125 on a birthday present for him. I found out that she had been leaving him notes on his desk. She was sending him Sexual memes every day. ANDto top it all off I called him and he admitted that 6 years ago she gave him oral sex twice. they both claim that this time was not Physical at all. what I need help with Is - should I ever trust her again? Does it seem like she had real emotion for him? I love her and she claims that she loves me. What should I do? she says that she is sorry and it will never happen again. She said that she loves me and wants to be with me and only me. **


*After her voluminous and covert texting history evidence with this joker, it just seems all too "convenient" that your W just gets herself a brand new job out of nowhere, more especially at the very same firm that her boyfriend was working at, but in another department!

And you believe that this just occurred out of sheer "coincidence?"

Well if you remotely believe any of that hooey, I'd love to sell you what's left of the Astrodome as an erstwhile investment ~ I think that you'd absolutely fall for anything!*
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

* @EleGirl ~ please be a sweetheart and merge his three threads, as they seem to be duplicative of each other, despite being in three different sections! 

Thanks, Arb!*
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## DanielleBennett (Oct 9, 2015)

She said she was sorry the first time and also claimed that it wouldn't happen again. You give her your trust so she could accept a job at the same company that he worked at and guess what..she lied! If she's been pursuing him this time around then maybe she followed him at that company? Either way, I wouldn't trust her again. If you want to make it work then you can suggest counseling with her better yet, separate while you two are in counseling to give yourselves time to go over things.


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