# Companionship



## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

From a man’s perspective, how important is companionship in your marriage ( particularly for those over 50).

What does companionship mean to you? 

Does it mean no passion?


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## aaarghdub (Jul 15, 2017)

It’s important to have common interests that bring you together or you love to do together. Otherwise you tend to drift apart and have your own things. You stop finding things to talk about and get excited about. 

Recreational companionship is definitely a need for nearly everyone. Problems emerge when you find your companionship needs in one bucket... your partner’s. There’s also the opposite problem where you just your fix somewhere and drift apart (I don’t mean an affair).

Passion is tied directly to the “i need to mate with this man” response in a woman. There are numerous things that drive “the need’ and wether or not there is a threat to him not being available. For men it’s simple... hormonal or need for emotional bonding. 

Bottom line... passion is inversely proportional to familiarity, access and proximity. 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## Casual Observer (Sep 13, 2012)

aine said:


> From a man’s perspective, how important is companionship in your marriage ( particularly for those over 50).
> 
> What does companionship mean to you?
> 
> Does it mean no passion?


Why would would even HINT that companionship should take the place of passion? It's ok to see "passion" changing its shape & form over time, but it is essential for many of us, perhaps most, that it survives in some form. What makes passion different from companionship, within marriage, is that companionship is a purpose anybody could serve. Passion is reserved for a relationship.

My wife can be my companion, but everything goes upside down if she thinks that's enough? Nope. That's not the marriage we signed up for. 

Note that passion doesn't mean boundless & energetic & ultra-frequent sex. But it does mean sharing things between a couple that are intimate and exclusive. Exclusive doesn't just imply but requires boundaries. I think I'm getting to the key point here. There has to be something for which boundaries apply, something that binds the two of you together and nobody else can take that place.


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## Thor (Oct 31, 2011)

As a man over 50, to me companionship means we enjoy spending time together doing all kinds of things. Everything from the mundane to the adventurous. It means we are grateful the other person is with us, and it makes things more fun than doing them alone.

Companionship also means support in tough times.

We don't have to spend all our time together, and in fact it is good if we have some of our own activities.

Passion is a different topic. One does not require the other. A lot of mundane activities won't have passion, like cleaning the house. But there has to be passion in the relationship, at least for me.


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## 2become1 (Dec 26, 2017)

Two people in a companionship may have to work harder to make it work, but the benefits are usually stronger than a romantic relationship.


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## Casual Observer (Sep 13, 2012)

2become1 said:


> Two people in a companionship may have to work harder to make it work, but the benefits are usually stronger than a romantic relationship.


If "companionship" grows out of need, a second choice seen as a substitute for passion, I don't think it bodes well for a stronger relationship. If one "settles" for companionship, and it's not a mutual thing (passionless on both sides of the equation), then fine. But if it arises because one partner doesn't fulfill their commitment to their marriage, and I don't mean by supplying sexual intimacy on demand but rather not understanding their part in their partner's unhappiness, then... what? I guess I'm just totally against settling for less than should be. 

Will be interesting to revisit my views 5 years down the road.


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## Hiner112 (Nov 17, 2019)

Instead of passion and companionship being exclusive, I would expect them to make the other more intense and/or frequent. If I had a lot of fun hanging out with someone and we understood how each other thought (IE we were good companions) I would expect the sex to be better as a result. If I had intense and regular sexual experiences with someone, I would expect to want to spend time with them at other times as well.

I've been wrong before though.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Hiner112 said:


> Instead of passion and companionship being exclusive, I would expect them to make the other more intense and/or frequent. If I had a lot of fun hanging out with someone and we understood how each other thought (IE we were good companions) I would expect the sex to be better as a result. If I had intense and regular sexual experiences with someone, I would expect to want to spend time with them at other times as well.
> 
> I've been wrong before though.
> 
> https://youtu.be/L0frA_0MjW8


Yeah but Friends != Lovers.


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## Tilted 1 (Jul 23, 2019)

Casual Observer said:


> What makes passion different from companionship, within marriage, is that companionship is a purpose anybody could serve. Passion is reserved for a relationship.
> 
> My* WIFE/HUSBAND* can be my companion, but everything goes upside down if she thinks that's enough? Nope. That's not the marriage we signed up for.
> 
> .


GOOD JOB, I This explains it direct and too the point!! Nice C.O.


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## Mr. Nail (Apr 26, 2011)

The question is either vague, leading, misleading or a trap. The thread starter posted it here and has fled the scene. Draw your own conclusion.

According to Harley recreational companionship is an emotional need that is frequently of high priority to men.
That is only one form of companionship.

I like recreational companionship.
I like passion.
I don't get intimate conversation. So it's a bit like air lately.


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

To me companionship is important (I"m a man over 50) but it in no way implies lack of passion. I want a partner who is a companion - and who is still passionate - about me, about life.


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## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

Mr. Nail said:


> The question is either vague, leading, misleading or a trap. The thread starter posted it here and has fled the scene. Draw your own conclusion.
> 
> According to Harley recreational companionship is an emotional need that is frequently of high priority to men.
> That is only one form of companionship.
> ...


no the poster has not fled the scene, I wanted mens responses. I don’t get your fleeing the scene jibe above


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## Mr. Nail (Apr 26, 2011)

aine said:


> no the poster has not fled the scene, I wanted mens responses. I don’t get your fleeing the scene jibe above


Edited to test the 7/10 edit bug fix.
Besides NO ONE reads this thread.


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