# Young women, guessing age



## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good evening
I was recently on a trip with my wife to beach resort- not out usual sort of place to go. In addition the the natural scenery, there were a lot of attractive women wearing very little. (and a lot of attractive men for her). Neither of us is jealous, neither has any intention whatsoever of acting on anything but we can both appreciate being in a place with lots of barely dressed aesthetically pleasing people.

OK, now the question. Some of the women were clearly adults, some were clearly children, but there were a lot where I really couldn't judge if they were 15 or 25. (remember, I'm not close, I'm certainly not staring, just noticing as I am sitting eating lunch or walking past). 

I'm in my 50s and mostly hang out with people my age, and I've found that I am now a terrible judge of ages of younger people. This isn't helped by movies and TV often using actors who are very different from the ages of the people they are playing.

I'm honestly starting to have more sympathy for adults caught with 16 year old's. Its not as if people come with manufacturing dates stamped on their foreheads. 

Are other men my age better at judging the age of young women?

Again, I'm not in any way acting on it, I just don't want to feel like a pervert for finding a 16 year old attractive...... (or was she 25?)


----------



## larry.gray (Feb 21, 2011)

I'm a horrible judge of women's age.

Around here there is horrible levels of obesity, particularly among women. I find that many people, including myself, will presume a woman who is at a healthy weight are young unless they have gray hair or heavy wrinkles.


----------



## john117 (May 20, 2013)

Some ethnicities are considerably harder to assess age than others. Puerto Rico... Good luck there . Wonderful place and people incidentally.

Also kids seem to look younger and younger for a given stage of life. Remember the movie "Love Story" and how Ali Mc Someone looked way old? Ali could pass for a college mom these days...


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Like I told my sons... check their driver's license and get a photo copy. So at least you have proof that you were being careful.


----------



## NotEasy (Apr 19, 2015)

We are similar ages and I have similar problem guessing women's ages, especially asians. Not a skill I really need, so I don't care, but it is frustrating.

My wife however can tell me their age and what country/area they came from. However I think she often is judging their clothing, so maybe she would have trouble on the beach.


----------



## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Asians?

In general just minus 5-10 yrs younger off your guess and you should be accurate.


----------



## alexm (Nov 29, 2008)

RandomDude said:


> Asians?
> 
> In general just minus 5-10 yrs younger off your guess and you should be accurate.


I used to work with a lovely Chinese woman who looked no older than 30 - no exaggeration. I found out some time later that she was in her late 40's and had 4 or 5 kids. I would have given her 28 or 29, easily. I was off by about 20 years.


----------



## VHVGN (Nov 24, 2015)

Some people take very good care of themselves - and add in favorable genetics, their age is very difficult to decipher. I am married to someone 22 years younger than me - and she looks younger than her 33 years to boot. As long as someone is a legal adult and has the maturity to enter into a relationship or physical intimacy, age is just relative.


----------



## Kivlor (Oct 27, 2015)

EleGirl said:


> Like I told my sons... check their driver's license and get a photo copy. So at least you have proof that you were being careful.


Don't forget to make them fill out the affirmative consent forms, so she can't cry "rape" when they don't call her later. Also, it's important they have affirmative consent for every action. So, they need it to hold hands, kiss, and everything after. Lots of paperwork, but it saves them in the long-run.

To the OP, I know it's pretty hard to tell sometimes. Sucks for the guys that made the mistake of not carding a girl like they're buying booze.


----------



## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

I've gotten bad at judging the ages of anyone under 40, but can usually tell if someone is under 30. Since I wouldn't get involved with (or fantasize about) anyone younger than 30, I don't worry about it. I can still appreciate attractive people who are younger - and spring break is only a couple of months away!


----------



## tech-novelist (May 15, 2014)

EleGirl said:


> Like I told my sons... check their driver's license and get a photo copy. So at least you have proof that you were being careful.


That will apparently serve as a defense against statutory rape claims at least in California, although of course state laws vary: California Statutory Rape Law; Penal Code 261.5 Unlawful Sex w/a Minor

I'm not a lawyer, do your own diligence, etc.


----------



## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good evening
agreed, in that I also have no intention of in any way acting on what I'm seeing. Still, I find it disturbing when I see a sexy beautiful woman in a string bikini, then I worry that maybe she is 16 and I'm an incredible perv....

I suspect all of them were over 18 - I tend to considerably underestimate, not overestimate people's ages.



Married but Happy said:


> snip .... I don't worry about it. I can still appreciate attractive people who are younger - and spring break is only a couple of months away!


----------



## tech-novelist (May 15, 2014)

Kivlor said:


> Don't forget to make them fill out the affirmative consent forms, so she can't cry "rape" when they don't call her later. Also, it's important they have affirmative consent for every action. So, they need it to hold hands, kiss, and everything after. Lots of paperwork, but it saves them in the long-run.


Unless she changes her mind in the meantime and forgets to tell him, in which case it may still be considered rape.

The only way to be sure you are safe is to avoid ever being in the same room with a woman without witnesses.

Actually even that may not be safe because it is just your word against hers that you didn't meet somewhere without witnesses.

Now of course in the old days when everyone was considered innocent until proven guilty, that wouldn't have been much of a problem. These days, it is, especially if one particular Presidential candidate gets elected:

"Every survivor of sexual assault deserves to be heard, believed, and supported."

Hillary Clinton: All Rape Victims Deserve To Be Believed - Breitbart


----------



## tech-novelist (May 15, 2014)

richardsharpe said:


> Good evening
> agreed, in that I also have no intention of in any way acting on what I'm seeing. Still, I find it disturbing when I see a sexy beautiful woman in a string bikini, then I worry that maybe she is 16 and I'm an incredible perv....


Being sexually attracted to a member of the opposite sex who is exhibiting secondary sexual characteristics is not perverted. It is normal.

Note that I'm not saying anyone should *act *on such attraction, which is legally very hazardous in most places. But the attraction itself is perfectly normal.


----------



## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good evening
Isn't the an affirmative consent discussion ongoing somewhere on the site.....

I guess it is a fair question of to what extent it is OK to look at women at the beach (assuming your own relationship doesn't prevent it). 

There was one attractive woman sunbathing at the edge of the pool, in a very open area, not on one of the lounges. She was regularly adjusting her string bikini, pouring suntan oil on - all with a style that gave the impression that she was trying to attract attention. (sadly for her, there didn't seem to be any single men at the resort - all were with families). There were lots of other women sunbathing, but they didn't seem to be putting on quite such an intentional show.


----------



## Mr The Other (Feb 1, 2014)

I have noticed that when I am in the company of young people (early twenties) people think I am a few years older than them. When I hang around with people in their forties, people guess me as thirties.


----------



## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

Everyone under thirty sounds brain damaged or monumentally annoying.


----------



## captainstormy (Jun 15, 2012)

I'm 31 and I often can't tell the difference between a college senior or highschool senior anymore.

Luckily I'm married so I don't have to worry 

Sent from my Nexus 5 using Tapatalk


----------



## CuddleBug (Nov 26, 2012)

richardsharpe said:


> Good evening
> I was recently on a trip with my wife to beach resort- not out usual sort of place to go. In addition the the natural scenery, there were a lot of attractive women wearing very little. (and a lot of attractive men for her). Neither of us is jealous, neither has any intention whatsoever of acting on anything but we can both appreciate being in a place with lots of barely dressed aesthetically pleasing people.
> 
> OK, now the question. Some of the women were clearly adults, some were clearly children, but there were a lot where I really couldn't judge if they were 15 or 25. (remember, I'm not close, I'm certainly not staring, just noticing as I am sitting eating lunch or walking past).
> ...



Young ladies today dress like women because they want to look and feel sexy. They want the man attention and that also means sex.

I'm not surprised to see them wearing mini jean shorts and shirts to show off their breasts. These are 14+ year old young ladies by the way.

Its just common today. In music videos, TV commercials, etc. this is what they see and copy.

Especially bad during summer and I live near the beach......I've had young ladies, probably early teens, walking down the street, stop and flirt with me about anything, then giggle and continue on.

How can I tell the age of a woman?

- her hands
- her neck
- her face

All tell me if she's young or old. If she has smooth, non wrinkly skin, you can tell she is young. If she's older, she may have a killer body and great hair style, but if her hands, neck and face are wrinkly and dehydrated looking, she's old.

Maybe its due to lack of muscle mass, testosterone and human growth hormone levels?

I'm 42 but my hands, neck and face are full looking. I have no wrinkles and I'm not dehydrated looking, so I look young than my age, compared to other guys my age range.

You can also tell how the ladies talk. Do they talk like teenagers? You know what I mean. "Like"....answer the statement with a question? Immature talk.

I have no issues checking out ladies of all age ranges. I'm not doing anything with them, but I am looking. If an older woman hits on me, dresses and looks hot, hmmmmm good. If a young woman does the same thing, hmmmmm good.

Just because you're 16 or 60 doesn't mean you don't have a sex drive. When I was 16, lots of self relieving and I wanted older women, 30+ year old. Now that I'm older, a younger woman makes me feel young again. Same with the ladies. 16 year old lady likes older men. 60 year old lady would like a younger man.


----------



## gouge_away (Apr 7, 2015)

technovelist said:


> Now of course in the old days when everyone was considered innocent until proven guilty, that wouldn't have been much of a problem. These days, it is, especially if one particular Presidential candidate gets elected:
> 
> "Every survivor of sexual assault deserves to be heard, believed, and supported."
> 
> Hillary Clinton: All Rape Victims Deserve To Be Believed - Breitbart


I find it quite amusing that even you, some anonymous internet forum contributor, still beat around the bush, almost afraid to just come out and say what you are thinking, drop names and punch your point right through the teeth of a hypocrite.

Believe me, when this topic comes up in a debate, Donald Trump will have no problem evoking the name of "Paula Jones, Bill Clinton," and the words "sexual assault."

What's Hillary going to do, chuckle and come back with some snide remarks about Donald inappropriately touching his then soon to be exwife's $100k boobs during an argument?

Right.... Cause I'm sure Hillary never took a swing at Bill in 40 years.


----------



## tech-novelist (May 15, 2014)

gouge_away said:


> I find it quite amusing that even you, some anonymous internet forum contributor, still beat around the bush, almost afraid to just come out and say what you are thinking, drop names and punch your point right through the teeth of a hypocrite.
> 
> Believe me, when this topic comes up in a debate, Donald Trump will have no problem evoking the name of "Paula Jones, Bill Clinton," and the words "sexual assault."
> 
> ...


Hmm, I didn't realize I was beating around the bush; I thought my point was perfectly clear.

However, since it apparently wasn't, I'll be thrilled almost beyond words to see Trump eviscerate Hillary on the topic of the "War on Women".


----------



## deg20 (Apr 10, 2015)

I teach college English...these young women come in to my class...ages 18 to 23 usually...wearing yoga pants and leggings...most of them tall and quite developed...healthy looking. I am professional, but I just want to say that yes, these young ladies look a hell of a lot older than the ages I mentioned...


----------



## ExiledBayStater (Feb 16, 2013)

EleGirl said:


> Like I told my sons... check their driver's license and get a photo copy. So at least you have proof that you were being careful.


Did anybody go along with it?

I certainly sought out a lot of 18+ or 21+ events back in the day. I figured they were safe in this respect.


----------



## ExiledBayStater (Feb 16, 2013)

intheory said:


> Middle-aged men used to regularly marry teenaged girls who were physically matured. If he's 30 and she's 16; what's wrong with that?


Too bad that her brain is also 16 years old. Seems like a lonely existence all around. I suppose that practice might have faded when marrying for love became popular.


----------



## nirvana (Jul 2, 2012)

richardsharpe said:


> Good evening
> agreed, in that I also have no intention of in any way acting on what I'm seeing. Still, I find it disturbing when I see a sexy beautiful woman in a string bikini, then I worry that maybe she is 16 and I'm an incredible perv....
> 
> I suspect all of them were over 18 - I tend to considerably underestimate, not overestimate people's ages.



I think we make too much of a big deal about this.

If she looks like a woman, then how are you a perv? You are looking at someone who looks like a woman. 
As someone turns 18, there is no big flash to make someone an adult and somehow it become okay to look.

These days women develop much earlier and the clothing they wear makes the look grown up, so men should not feel guilty.

The problem is when you stare at someone who very obviously looks like a child.


----------



## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good evening
Its society that weird. It considered fine by most people to look at pictures of naked 18 year old's, but owning a picture of a naked 16 year old is a felony sex offense. 

Because of society's extreme reaction and sharply defined edge, I try to stay very far away from anything that could look like any form of interest in pedophilia. 




nirvana said:


> I think we make too much of a big deal about this.
> 
> If she looks like a woman, then how are you a perv? You are looking at someone who looks like a woman.
> As someone turns 18, there is no big flash to make someone an adult and somehow it become okay to look.
> ...


----------



## nirvana (Jul 2, 2012)

richardsharpe said:


> Good evening
> Its society that weird. It considered fine by most people to look at pictures of naked 18 year old's, but owning a picture of a naked 16 year old is a felony sex offense.
> 
> Because of society's extreme reaction and sharply defined edge, I try to stay very far away from anything that could look like any form of interest in pedophilia.



Yes, I agree with you. 
And it is ridiculous the way society looks at it. I have seen high school age girls waiting at street corners for their buses with bags on their shoulders dressed like 20 year olds looking all-woman. Are they attractive? Yes. Should someone do things to them? No!

A lot of people do think that they are attractive but are afraid to say so because of fear of getting labeled.


----------



## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good evening
I think the law needs some smoother edges. It shouldn't go from "OK" to sex-offender felony on someone's 18th birthday. Especially I think we can soften child porn laws quite a bit to avoid the trap that someone who collects images of legal age women can be unintentionally guilty of a felony if they run into an underage image.

There are a whole rage of possible laws - from making it illegal to sell images, to making it an infraction to posses one, to a misdemeanor, to a felony. Similarly for the legality of sex with younger women - rather than a sharp edge at 18, have a sliding scale of the criminality and the acceptability of levels of consent from say 15 to 20. 


None of this is an issue for me personally - I'm not going around hitting on marginally legal age children, but the laws still bother me.


----------



## lifeisbetterthanalternat (Apr 24, 2012)

Richard, 

Consider yourself lucky that your wife is secure enough to not care about you looking. I too am conflicted with this age thing as it is hard to tell. There also seems be many very young women that dress very suggestively. During a recent beach resort trip I found myself admiring a women from behind. She was wearing a very skimpy bathing suit where her cheeks were hanging out. At the time I found the sight delightful and caused a visceral reaction on my part. However, when she turned around I realized she was 15 at best. I could not help but, feel like a creep. 

In the absence of bad intent, I wonder if admiring the beauty of a young girl to be so terrible. As my daughter goes through puberty, I see men of all ages admiring her beauty and am coming to terms with it so long as they are not "leering". 

I wonder how the Beatles' lyrics "she was just 17...you know what I mean" would go over today. Actually, I rephrase, People would go batshi..


----------



## nirvana (Jul 2, 2012)

If she looks like a woman, then I don't think you have anything to feel guilty about. Pedos are attracted to children. The distinction is very clear. 18 is an arbitrary number defined by legal people. Your brain does not care for that number. If she looks like a woman, and you are straight, you will be attracted.

There was a 24 year old hottie at my work place last year. Then I realized she was closer in age to my son than to me! Then the realization that I was getting older.


----------



## Nucking Futs (Apr 8, 2013)

It can go both ways. The genetically gifted Christie Brinkley at 61 years of age:


----------



## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

that's because pure pitch black soulless evil is timeless.


----------

