# Served with papers, devastated



## Sakaye (Feb 15, 2011)

Got served with divorce papers. I knew it was coming but the feeling of devastation when being served, was, is, almost unbearable.
I miss my ex husband so much. 
The hard part is that its uncontested, but his mother doesn't want him talking to me. She's always been jealous because we bonded on a level that obviously a mother would never bond with him on. She was jealous of our closeness. . . 
Recently it was getting nice again too. He was talking to me normally, and it felt like finally we made it through the ugliness. That is THE hardest part. 
We are filing un-contested, yet his crazy mother refuses to let us sit down together to go through paperwork in fear he's going to change his mind. She hired a lawyer and all kinds of BS. But its just horrible. I never thought my stbx husband would stoop so low as to treat me like this. Right when I thought he could be civil again, he's a total douche. He's only like that after he speaks with his mother, that's his MO. I wish he would grow up and think for himself.
The feeling of loss is almost unbearable by itself, I just don't understand why they're being so mean. Don't they get how hard it is already.
I mean seriously, I get it, its over. You don't have to be an ******* about it. Its hard enough already.
He broke my heart already, why does he have to keep trampling on it???
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Shooboomafoo (Mar 30, 2011)

Sounds like the best thing that ever couldve happened to you.
A grown man still being led around by his mommy, hasnt the capacity to be good for you.
Theres the door, and its opening for you... RUN..


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## Sakaye (Feb 15, 2011)

You're right. I just wish it didn't hurt so bad. And I wish I wasn't around to see that he has moved on - even before the divorce. He already has a new girlfriend. Geez the man works quick. 
Why the hell am I finding it so hard to let go. . .


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## lovemybabies (Oct 4, 2011)

find peace in knowing that you will overcome this and be stronger for it...him on the other hand will always have his crazy mother in his ear. If he can't set boundaries with her any relationship he gets into will suffer because of her and you'll be in a place of happiness when he's forever miserable.


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## Sakaye (Feb 15, 2011)

I can't lie, I miss him sooo much. It was definitely a whirlwind romance, and he stole my heart. I didn't just lose my husband, I lost a great friend, and that, is what hurts the absolute most. He was my friend first, a good one. I wish I never crossed the boundaries of friendship. It is definitely heartbreaking to know that he can move on so fast, that I was not as important in his life as he was in mine. To realize that he not only has moved on, but festered inside this hate for me. This need to belittle me to people around me, to drag me down in order to make himself look good. 
I have never hated before, but I hate him. 
This has to be the MOST crushing thing I've ever been through in my life emotionally. I've never been so f*d up. 
I'm trying so hard to be strong for my children, but my nerves are wearing thin. I want to wash away the hurt.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Sorry to hear of your heartache.
Think about it this way: receiving the D papers is just a list on the things you must cross off on this journey to divorce. And you survived that crippling moment. Good for you!
If he's unwilling to sit down and discuss things re: D agreements, get a lawyer and ask for what you want and respond to the petition. 

From now on I wouldn't talk to him about anything other than the D and your kids. You need to go no contact w/ him to protect yourself from more hurt.

A divorce is extremely traumatic and throws your entire life into a spin but I promise you, there is a life after D and you will be a better/stronger person for it.


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