# Help and Advice please



## robbie3000 (Oct 8, 2016)

Hi new here but here goes..

I moved out to the usa from the uk nearly 4 years ago, I had met this American woman through work and she was amazing. My soul mate it felt. I was in an abusive marriage so divorced my ex wife.
the company I worked for transferred me out to the states and we lived together. I sold most of by belongings in the uk, left my two teenage kids behind, as there mother would hardly let me see them anyway.
We got married after knowing each other for 3 years. I applied for my green card etc. and all was right with the world, we got on like a house on fire.
I sold my house in the uk and bought one in the usa last year.
we had our ups and down like most relationships. I got very home sick at times and missed my kids and parents. 
then back in march her step dad came to stay and she changed into a nasty, angry person. had no time for me just her step dad. then her mother tried to kill herself and they both ran off to be with her.
I got very down and depressed as at the same time my dad was diagnosed with terminal cancer and had a few months to live.
I started to get very angry and upset, had no support from my wife and would say nasty things due to the guilt I felt about my dad.
Her step dad went and things started to get better, my dad died, and we had the funeral. 
Then her mother moved in with us, and it all went down hill rapidly, she became angry again and pushed me away, only person that mattered was her mother. they both moved out 2 months ago and she has now rented a house for them, even though we don't have the money, I am currently not working. I am trying to cope with grieving over my dad with no support from my wife, only support I have no in the states is from a group session and my therapist.
we went to marriage councelling and this week my wife announced there that the marriage was over, she wont speak to me or anything. she said this the same day a line of credit came through and she instantly took a large chunk of money out of it.
I had a text message from her this morning say only contact is to be the postal service.
I am 5000 miles from home, alone, scared, love my wife so bad. Really depressed and on drugs to help with that and still trying to cope with my dad.
any help or advice?

thank you


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

I'm sorry you are going through this. I have no doubt that it sucks.

But today, you need to start dealing with the reality of your situation. To start that file for divorce.

This will limit the financial damage your wife can do to you. Her taking a lot of money out on a line of credit is a very bad sign. Did she apply for it on her own, or did both of you?

Since she did that after she moved out of your home, you can claim that it occurred after your separation and the court might not hold you equally responsible to pay it back.

My suggestion is that you file for divorce, if she is working as for some spousal support until the divorce is final or you get a job.

Where do you want to live if you are not married to her? USA? England?


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## robbie3000 (Oct 8, 2016)

Easier said than done when you love somebody a hell of a lot and sacrificed your life for them.
the line of credit was joint and the day we applied she moved out to a hotel with her mother.
I am applying for maybe 3 or 4 jobs a day but not a lot going in Oregon.
I would guess back in the uk, as would have nothing left here for me, but don't know if I can afford that as she would I presume get half the house which I paid for with my sale of my house in the uk. and it is joint names, I know I should have covered my arse.


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