# Need advice fast



## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

Last August my DIL invited her best friend to live with them while she tried to find a job. After a short time my son got involved with the OS. My son basically booted my DIL and GS out. My DIL and GS have been living with us since. Well of course the OS got pregnant and they are going to induce this evening. I'm torn about going. Right now I don't think I'm going, but am I wrong?


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## kristin2349 (Sep 12, 2013)

Wow, that is really a tough one. I'm sorry this is happening to you and your family. 

What has your relationship with your son and the OS been like? Has your son asked you to be there? Have you spoken to your DIL about it at all? 

There is no easy answer on this one. Where you there when your DIL gave birth?


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## SecondTime'Round (Jan 15, 2015)

I am being so dense, but what does OS mean? I mean, I know who she is essentially.

I know it's your son, but no, I would not go. Visit the BABY in the hospital after he/she arrives.


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

My son told us we could come, but would understand if we didn't. For some reason my DIL wants to be there. There is a slight chance it could be someone else. That's what I'm praying for.

If it's my grandchild I will love it, but that girl is not to set foot on my property.


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

SecondTime'Round said:


> I am being so dense, but what does OS mean? I mean, I know who she is essentially.
> 
> I know it's your son, but no, I would not go. Visit the BABY in the hospital aftee/she arrives.


you're not dense. It's an abbreviation I made up. Other skank.


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## kristin2349 (Sep 12, 2013)

What do you mean there is a slight chance it could be someone else? Are you not sure who this woman is?

Does your son know your DIL wants to be there?


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

kristin2349 said:


> Wow, that is really a tough one. I'm sorry this is happening to you and your family.
> 
> What has your relationship with your son and the OS been like? Has your son asked you to be there? Have you spoken to your DIL about it at all?
> 
> There is no easy answer on this one. Where you there when your DIL gave birth?


Yes we were there and we were excited.


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## kristin2349 (Sep 12, 2013)

SecondTime'Round said:


> I am being so dense, but what does OS mean? I mean, I know who she is essentially.
> 
> I know it's your son, but no, I would not go. Visit the BABY in the hospital after he/she arrives.



Oddly I knew he meant Other Skank or SlvT, my mind is warped that way.


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

I personally wouldn't go for the birth but would be interested in my grandchild. 

Seriously messed up. Sorry for your tough situation.

I would want to work my son out in the ring.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

kristin2349 said:


> What do you mean there is a slight chance it could be someone else? Are you not sure who this woman is?
> 
> Does your son know your DIL wants to be there?


Lol. She is still in love with her ex. My dumb azz son knows this and is still with her. He wants my DIL to be there. You see, my son is a cakeater and apparently a very good one at that.


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

ConanHub said:


> I personally wouldn't go for the birth but would be interested in my grandchild.
> 
> Seriously messed up. Sorry for your tough situation.
> 
> ...


Believe me that thought has crossed my mind many times.


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

I really resent what THEY have done to my grandson. That little man has drawn my wife and me so close to each other. He is such a blessing in so many ways. I guess all grandparents think the same way LOL.


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## kristin2349 (Sep 12, 2013)

I agree with Conan, I wouldn't be there for the birth. I would go afterwards.

I don't think you should encourage your DIL to go either, it really isn't a healthy situation for her to still be hanging on to him.


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## Lostinthought61 (Nov 5, 2013)

Have you told your son how disappointed you are in him? If I were you and your wife I would him that because of his actions that you both decided that you are changing your will to exclude him out of it and setting up trust funds for the grand children when they get older....you should not reward bad behavior.


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

Xenote said:


> Have you told your son how disappointed you are in him? If I were you and your wife I would him that because of his actions that you both decided that you are changing your will to exclude him out of it and setting up trust funds for the grand children when they get older....you should not reward bad behavior.



Oh he knows how we feel.


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## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

That's all very obviously complicated. 

How is your relationship with your son? Do you feel you should support him? Is your DIL still involved with your son? In any event, she has no place there. If this child is your son's, and you want to be part of the child's life, then you could certainly consider being there. But your son's GF may not want you to be part of her child's life so from that standpoint being there requires some thought. 

I don't like drama -- and this situation is filled with it -- so under the circumstances I doubt I would be there but I'm not you. Ultimately, you have to choose. As I recall, you're religious so I assume you've prayed about it? What do you feel was the answer?


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

I would probably impose every sanction I could bring to bear on my son until he shaped up.

His behavior is barfworthy.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## morituri (Apr 1, 2011)

I hate saying this but your son deserves to be betrayed by the OS. It wouldn't surprise me if the child was not his but of the OS X. That would be poetic justice.


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

Hmm. I wouldn't go. Additionally, I probably wouldn't have anything to do w/ the child w/o first seeing a positive paternity test.


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## Hardtohandle (Jan 10, 2013)

Your son threw his wife and this other woman out and they are living with you ?

How do they get along under the same roof ?

Is the other woman pushing for the angle that the baby is actually her old BF ( the man she still loves ) and not your sons ?

I'm assuming DNA test are going to be done to get these answers..

Is your son of the belief that the child is his or that he will love and care for this child as IF it where his own ?

I am guessing your DIL has no family.. 

The only reason I could imagine your DIL going is because the other man is not of the same ethnicity of her husband/your son.. And this would immediately shed some light on who's child it is.. Other than that I cannot see a reason why she would want to go and suffer more pain.. 

Don't you think that is something that should have been discussed months ago and not last minute.. I mean really WTF... Someone there has to have their head on straight with all this sh!t going on.. Again I'm not trying to be a d0uche about this but someone has to think a little past the point of their nose there.. Someone has to bring up the WHAT IFs and get some real life answers to those WHAT IF questions..

Its obvious your son and this other woman can't or they wouldn't have been in this situation in the first place..

But someone needs to take the god dam bull by the horns here..


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## Nomorebeans (Mar 31, 2015)

Hardtohandle, I think Thound was saying his son threw out his wife (DIL) and their son (GS - Grandson), not his wife and his girlfriend.

And the OS (I like that) was his wife's best friend? I believe there's a special place in Hell for that kind of AP.

I'm with the other folks about not going, and with Gus about not having anything to do with the baby until paternity is established.

I'm confused, Thound, about your son's relationship with the OS. Are they living together or married? Are he and your DIL divorced? My heart breaks for her. What a monumentally sh!tty series of events she's had to live through because of your son's nonsense.


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## kristin2349 (Sep 12, 2013)

Hardtohandle said:


> Your son threw his wife and this other woman out and they are living with you ?
> *He had an affair with the best friend now OW, known as OS
> How do they get along under the same roof ?]
> 
> ...


*


I know the situation is confusing but I think you misread a few things.*


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## Hardtohandle (Jan 10, 2013)

kristin2349 said:


> I know the situation is confusing but I think you misread a few things.


Just figured out what GS was.. 

Not looking to monday morning QB here.. 

But Thound needs to be the voice of reasoning here.. He needs to take the point here because it is obvious no one else can..

He needs to get everyone together, bonk their heads and say listen stupid. Do what I tell you and STFU because your ideas are stupid and suck.. If you have a bright idea, STFU and keep it to yourself because again your ideas are stupid and suck.. 

I just think a game plan or some sort of game plan should have been ready months ago.. Or come to the forum months in advance.. 
But coming here now last minute ?

Okay its not his kid ? What next ? Will the wife take him back ? Does he want to go back regardless ?

Okay it is his kid.. What next ? Will the wife take him back ? Does he want to go back regardless ?

Does this other woman want him ? 

Is he just gonna be divorced and pay child support for 2 kids ?

I'm gonna say this simply.. They both fvcked each other.. No one is worse or better than the other.. They are both utter a$$holes for what they did.. 


Look as disappointed I would be for my son. I honestly would try to help him fix this with at least one of these women.. Because reality is this is really gonna suck for him.. 2 child support checks to 2 women.. 2 kids, possibly 2 visitation days.. Who knows.. 

Anyone who has been through this knows, this sucks moose c0ck in many different ways I don't need to express.. But unless this guy is making really, really good money or has the future potential of making good money. He could be scratching by for the next 20 years of his life.. Again not a fun feeling to go through life.. 

I think these are the questions that need to be asked and not do I go to the hospital.


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

My DIL still wants my son back. I can't for the life of me figure out why. My son makes $15 hour. I have been trying to get him to go to school, and he always says he will, but he never follows through. Of course he is vey busy playing video games and playing his guitar though. I think the OS saw my DIL so happy and making it. She figures she wanted what they had. What she doesn't realize, we were helping them get by. If my son had the same 2 year degree that I have he could be making $30 an hour right out of school. We are not helping my son and the OS. If my son is hungry he can come over and eat, but I'm not giving him any money.


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Thound said:


> Lol. She is still in love with her ex. My dumb azz son knows this and is still with her. He wants my DIL to be there. You see, my son is a cakeater and apparently a very good one at that.


My response would be:

"Son, I will always love you, but right now I can't stand to be around you because you have so severely disappointed me. I will not attend. I may someday be able to be around your new child, but I will never be around your OS because of what you did to your family. Best of luck."


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Thound said:


> My DIL still wants my son back. I can't for the life of me figure out why. My son makes $15 hour. I have been trying to get him to go to school, and he always says he will, but he never follows through. Of course he is vey busy playing video games and playing his guitar though. I think the OS saw my DIL so happy and making it. She figures she wanted what they had. What she doesn't realize, we were helping them get by. If my son had the same 2 year degree that I have he could be making $30 an hour right out of school. We are not helping my son and the OS. If my son is hungry he can come over and eat, but I'm not giving him any money.


Personally, I wouldn't even allow him to eat my food. No offense, but it sounds like he perhaps learned to be so selfish by being coddled and receiving no consequences and not having to live up to any expectations.

It's not too late to change that. Take your DIL to a lawyer tomorrow so she can hear from a professional what kind of mess she's in.


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

turnera said:


> My response would be:
> 
> "Son, I will always love you, but right now I can't stand to be around you because you have so severely disappointed me. I will not attend. I may someday be able to be around your new child, but I will never be around your OS because of what you did to your family. Best of luck."


I have told him if the child is his, he can bring the child over, but the OS is persona non grata!


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

He screws another woman, then KICKS HIS WIFE AND KID OUT...and you will let him come to your house?

No wonder he thinks he walks on water. His own parent reinforces it.


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## Happilymarried25 (Mar 19, 2014)

I wouldn't go see the new baby and I wouldn't see my son or allow him to come over. Odds are this relationship isn't going to work out anyway and the OW will take the baby and you won't be able to see the baby. Your son should get a DNA test because this GF sounds like she sleeps around, maybe she was pregnant before they met and she is looks for a Baby Daddy. I don't know how he is going to afford to pay for child support for both of these children but I hope his wife has filed for divorce and is getting child support.


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