# When you can't say "I love you "



## Corazon (Jul 11, 2018)

After 12 yrs marriage, 17 together, this week we decided to divorce. There is a lot of hurt, but we both still care about each other a lot. We're taking it slowly, realizing we need to figure out what next we each want in life, (neither wants to make any rash decisions) and moreover it'll be prolly at least 6 mo before we can separate financially.
Right now it's hard to say "I love you" because we need to start moving on, plus all the hurt. But it's so odd not saying it. It's a phrase that punctuated every conversation. It was automatic. And we care about each other, we're best friends. We just know that it's over.
So what can I say instead? It's too cold and weird to say "bye" and leave it at that.


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## SentHereForAReason (Oct 25, 2017)

Well first of all you can explain what circumstances brought you both to the point of divorce. That will help us help you.


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## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

You learn to just say “bye”. It’s hard but you do it.

If you go through a divorce, there may be a time or two in there when you’ll have the chance to say “I still love you” if you want to at that point (as long as you don’t mean in love with you).


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## brooklynAnn (Jun 29, 2015)

Bye....see you later.....


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## Lostinthought61 (Nov 5, 2013)

I like you? Aloha ? Cheers?

will you be in each other lives after the divorce or are their kids involved ? if they are involved, then come up with something you can both agree on....if there are no kids then keep it simple bye.


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## lari (Jun 30, 2018)

Divorce will be a lot more uncomfortable than just not saying I love you. Do you still love your spouse? Some context around your divorce would help. It sounds like you are still working through some feelings for your spouse. Identify what they are. Remind yourself about why you are divorcing and try to start moving on. It will be hard, but you'll get used to it.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*Under these dire circumstances, never say "I love you!" 

First off, they really don't want to hear it and just the mere utterance of it will simply rip your heart out!

Continue "180ing them" and just remain aloof!*


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## MThomas (May 8, 2018)

Don't let the door hit you where the good Lord split you!


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