# Trouble with orgasm



## starlight415 (Oct 30, 2011)

This is horrible. Throughout my entire relationship with my husband, we have always had great sex. Unlike many married couples, we have sex on a regular basis.

However, I've run into a problem. Within the past three months, I am having a hard time reaching orgasm. I feel it building, like I'm going to go, but then it fizzles. This is upsetting, because I never had trouble orgasming, but lately, it's been almost impossible.

We have been married for over four years, and I love my husband deeply. I have had a lot on my mind lately, and I find myself worrying a lot during sex. Sometimes I worry about whether or not I will have an orgasm. I know that worrying makes it harder to orgasm and that I should just relax. But every time I'm right on the brink, I worry, and the feeling goes away. I used to have no trouble having an orgasm.

Any ideas on what we can do to make me have the big O? Has anyone else here ever had this problem? Any advice would be much appreciated.


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## starlight415 (Oct 30, 2011)

I don't take birth control pills. I can get there by myself. But sometimes, I get frustrated with the vibrator, because it takes too long. 

Not much else has changed. Our son has special needs, so he has a lot of doctor appointments. He's always had a lot of appointments, though.


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## michzz (Jun 6, 2008)

Could be just not able to focus, but worth getting a checkup to make sure.


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## Enchantment (May 11, 2011)

Women can suffer from performance anxiety just like men can. Sometimes, assuming that you are otherwise healthy and your relationship with your partner is good, putting too much pressure on yourself (or even your partner putting that pressure on you) to orgasm can make it a very elusive event.

In that case, you need to focus more on the 'journey' and not so much on the end destination.

If you feel that there could be a physical issue involved, or you are on a medication (like certain anti-depressants) that can cause anorgasmia (lack of orgasm), you should go see your doctor.

Anorgasmia in women - MayoClinic.com

Best wishes.


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