# HIMS (man pill for sex)



## Happieward (Oct 30, 2019)

So recently my husband decided to get that pill called hims... I actually didnt know he had it , I found them. 
We fought about it, I asked why he said because he wants to be better in bed with me, he thinks I am bored. Personally I dont believe him. I did ask him if he would throw them away and not get any more, he agreed. 
2 months later we are going out of state, he was trying to find his phone, so I grabbed his bag and guess what more of HIMS. I was so pissed. He said he can he is sorry, but he needs to take them and he doesn't want me knowing when he takes them and he even hid them in our room.
Not sure how to feel, do I just let him do his thing and not feel insecure about I? Because this really messes with my head sometimes?

If anyone knows or has been through this please let me know your feedback.

Thank you!


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## notmyjamie (Feb 5, 2019)

What is their purpose? Help to get an erection or to help him last longer? I’ve never heard of this particular pill. 

He may be having problems with ED and doesn’t want you to know which is understandable.


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## Mr.Married (Feb 21, 2018)

He is insecure about HIMSELF .... so he takes the pills.

From your point of view: If he thought I was hot enough he would not need the pills.

I know that in your mind it is about you, but it really isn't like that.

If he needs that extra little security in his own mind .... let him have it.


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## EllisRedding (Apr 10, 2015)

So he is taking ED medication (Cialis / Viagra), that is what HIMS is. So what is the big deal, why is this an issue for you?


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

Please........

He may be telling you the truth. As men age, their plumbing plugs up.

It can start as early as age 45. He actually may need it. 
He is bringing it with him on your joint trip.

OK, he may also need it for some other women, OW. 

But, do you have any proof of that?
Has he cheated in the past?

If he is NOT a cheater, be happy that he wants to attain an erection with.....for you. 

If you continue to shame him, you may end up with no erection to enjoy, and soon no man that sports one.
Sports one with you in mind.



KB-


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

From their ads on TV, they offer the popular ED medicines and generic, self label it.


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## EllisRedding (Apr 10, 2015)

SunCMars said:


> From their ads on TV, they offer the popular ED medicines and generic, self label it.


Yup, that is all it is. Very common now, many companies coming out doing this (HIMS, GetRoman, etc...). Why the OP asked him to throw away and not get anymore is beyond me...


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## Happieward (Oct 30, 2019)

Very true.. Thank you.


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

Hims, Hers, get their engines running, their libido started and revved. Grab the man's stick shifter and put her in high gear.

The saddest lady gear selection is in park. Uh, maybe in reverse!


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## DownButNotOut (Apr 9, 2009)

To be clear, HIMS is a company, not a medication. What he bought from them is an ED med, a generic version of either viagra or cialis. Something many men of a certain age need.

Let’s start at face value. He is feeling insecure about his sexual performance with you. He was too embarrassed to talk to you about it, so he got an ED med prescription from HIMS to help him. Taken this way he cares enough about intimacy with you to do what he can to improve it. Many on this board would love their partner to care enough to address their intimacy issues with that kind of initiative. Yes, he hid them. He probably thought you would overreact if you knew. From your initial post, his fear was valid.

Why don’t you believe this take? Is your sex life satisfying? Are you suspecting he bought them for someone else? Are there any other red flags pointing that way? If not, maybe it is what you see on the surface, your husband cares about your sex lives enough to fix a problem he is having before the problem got worse.


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

Dear Happieward, 

I think you opened a can of worms, mostly those soft wigglers hoping to be that firm electric eel.



Lilith McGarvey


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## kari2 (Jul 8, 2016)

Happieward Douglas said:


> Not sure how to feel, do I just let him do his thing and not feel insecure about I? Because this really messes with my head sometimes?
> 
> If anyone knows or has been through this please let me know your feedback.


Whether he takes an ED medication like HIMS should be up to HIM. He should be the only judge of whether he needs it to maintain his own erection since it is his body. Whether he has ED has nothing to do with your attractiveness, it is not about you. Actually I think you should apologize for overstepping regarding his decisions about his own body. I think it is lucky for you if he cares to do something about his ED, some men just start avoiding sex if they are nervous about performing and they avoid going to a doctor because they are too embarrassed.

Also, don't quiz him before/during/after your sexual encounters about whether he has taken an ED pill or not. He might feel embarrassed so let him have his privacy on that subject.


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## EllisRedding (Apr 10, 2015)

Happieward said:


> Very true.. Thank you.


So there are a few things that could be happening:

1. He is having some issues with ED. Now keep in mind, this is something that can be very sensitive/embarrassing for men which is why if this is the case he is doing it without wanting to talk about it with you.

2. Maybe something is missing in your sex life? Maybe you don't want sex as much as he does, or he doesn't think you are very interested in. He might be thinking that he just "hardens" up and brings his A game, you will be begging for more. 

I think it is worth having a talk with him, see if he can open up about why he needs it. There is nothing wrong with using ED medication. In fact, there are quite a few health benefits outside of ED (using something like 5mg Cialis daily which every man should be on).


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## StillSearching (Feb 8, 2013)

Happieward said:


> So recently my husband decided to get that pill called hims... I actually didnt know he had it , I found them.
> We fought about it, I asked why he said because he wants to be better in bed with me, he thinks I am bored. Personally I dont believe him. I did ask him if he would throw them away and not get any more, he agreed.
> 2 months later we are going out of state, he was trying to find his phone, so I grabbed his bag and guess what more of HIMS. * I was so pissed.* He said he can he is sorry, but he needs to take them and he doesn't want me knowing when he takes them and he even hid them in our room.
> Not sure how to feel, do I just let him do his thing and not feel insecure about I? Because this really messes with my head sometimes?
> ...


Here's the real problem


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## Taxman (Dec 21, 2016)

OK, so he is taking generic viagra. First question, has the quality of his erection reduced in the last year or so? Second, is he overweight? Diabetic? High blood pressure? According to my Internist, ED medication is indicated only if the quality of the erection has reduced or if there is difficulty in achieving said erection. Tadalefil and Sildenafil assist blood flow to the corpora cavernosa in the penis. If he has no issues, then the effect is really only psychological. In any event, this has nothing to do with you and everything to do with him.


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## ReformedHubby (Jan 9, 2013)

OP,

My advice is to leave him alone about this. He wants to be a better lover for you...his wife. Please don't make him feel dirty or ashamed for taking ED pills. Its something men are embarrassed to talk to their own docs about in many cases. Which is why HIMS and other sites like it exist. There are a lot of men with either Low-T and or ED problems that refuse to do anything about it, and the intimacy in their relationship suffers as a result. 

As for the pills themselves, a healthy man in his 40s usually functions normally...but my alter ego DeformedHubby told me that there is some benefit to recreational use of ED pills even if you don't have ED. According to him it pretty much eliminates recovery time, and also the other benefit is, its pretty much an instant response, and I mean instant, like back when you were a teenager and the wind blows. Recreational use of these pills is the dirty little secret of a lot of guys out there. But...most want outright admit to it when asked by females, but would be forthcoming when talking about it with the fellas.


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## Girl_power (Aug 11, 2018)

Let him do it. If I were you I would of pretended not to even see them. He’s embarrassed and trust me it has nothing to do with you.


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## ReformedHubby (Jan 9, 2013)

Taxman said:


> OK, so he is taking generic viagra. First question, has the quality of his erection reduced in the last year or so? Second, is he overweight? Diabetic? High blood pressure? According to my Internist, ED medication is indicated only if the quality of the erection has reduced or if there is difficulty in achieving said erection. Tadalefil and Sildenafil assist blood flow to the corpora cavernosa in the penis. If he has no issues, then the effect is really only psychological. In any event, this has nothing to do with you and everything to do with him.


Have you tried these pills? I can assure you the effect of ED pills is not psychological. I know guys of all ages that use them on occasion. One thing in her post that she said that was of interest to me was that they were headed out of state. I wonder if this was a pleasure trip? Because Cialis is known as the "weekender" pill. Lots of married guys that wouldn't normally take them, do so when going on trips with their wives. I assume this is because most couples tend to have a lot more sex when they get away from it all. I mean depending on what country you are visiting, you can literally buy these pills legally without a prescription at your hotel or resort. Also if you ask most doctors for a prescription...honestly...they'll just give them to you rather you have a "problem" or not. I think they kind of know the deal.


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## ReformedHubby (Jan 9, 2013)

Girl_power said:


> Let him do it. If I were you I would of pretended not to even see them. He’s embarrassed and trust me it has nothing to do with you.


Yeah...I think OP made it worse, certainly not something to yell at the poor guy about. Pretty sure he noticed a decline in his virility and was trying to do something about it.


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

What a piece of work you are! Poor guy is feeling insecure and is trying something to keep YOU happy and you turn it around on him.


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## Girl_power (Aug 11, 2018)

ReformedHubby said:


> Yeah...I think OP made it worse, certainly not something to yell at the poor guy about. Pretty sure he noticed a decline in his virility and was trying to do something about it.




It’s no big deal. It’s a natural reaction to take it personally as the women. There is a big misconception about male sexuality. We think their erections have everything that do with their attraction towards us. I learned the hard way as well that it’s rarely about us.


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## maquiscat (Aug 20, 2019)

Well this has been beat to death as to the most likely reason he is taking them. I would like to know from the OP what the concern initially was, even if it is no longer applicable.

Sent from my cp3705A using Tapatalk


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## MaiChi (Jun 20, 2018)

Happieward said:


> So recently my husband decided to get that pill called hims... I actually didnt know he had it , I found them.
> We fought about it, I asked why he said because he wants to be better in bed with me, he thinks I am bored. Personally I dont believe him. I did ask him if he would throw them away and not get any more, he agreed.
> 2 months later we are going out of state, he was trying to find his phone, so I grabbed his bag and guess what more of HIMS. I was so pissed. He said he can he is sorry, but he needs to take them and he doesn't want me knowing when he takes them and he even hid them in our room.
> Not sure how to feel, do I just let him do his thing and not feel insecure about I? Because this really messes with my head sometimes?
> ...


I have just Googled and found that the pills are for hair loss and for ED. 

Either way if he is have one or both of these issues then he actually needs to be seen by the doctor and given more suitable treatment. The one thing he may not need at all is to be criticised about the matter. I would think that would make his problem worse. I think it is a very personal problem and needs sensitivity and support. If that happened to mine I do not think I would tell him off. I would possibly encourage him to go and be seen by an official doctor.


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## Lloyd Dobler (Apr 24, 2014)

Although it was never explicitly stated by OP, I think the issue is that she thinks her husband is using them with someone other than herself. If that's the case, then the narrative changes dramatically. OP, am I on the right track here?


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## Wolfman1968 (Jun 9, 2011)

Lloyd Dobler said:


> Although it was never explicitly stated by OP, I think the issue is that she thinks her husband is using them with someone other than herself. If that's the case, then the narrative changes dramatically. OP, am I on the right track here?


 I didn't get that message. Especially when her husband had it packed in a bag to go out of state with HER. Are you thinking that he was secretly bringing another woman out of state with them? Otherwise your view doesn't make sense to me.


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

MaiChi said:


> *I have just Googled and found that the pills are for hair loss and for ED. *


Uh, no. :smile2:

They sell pills for ED, and a liquid applicator containing Minoxidil [Rogaine] rubbed into the scalp for hair loss. 

And they sell other items, that 'He's, and HIMs (might need) conveniently from one source.

In short, they sell ED products for men who have been shorted, on top of their head, and by their little head.


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## Yeswecan (Jul 25, 2014)

Happieward said:


> So recently my husband decided to get that pill called hims... I actually didnt know he had it , I found them.
> We fought about it, I asked why he said because he wants to be better in bed with me, he thinks I am bored. Personally I dont believe him. I did ask him if he would throw them away and not get any more, he agreed.
> 2 months later we are going out of state, he was trying to find his phone, so I grabbed his bag and guess what more of HIMS. I was so pissed. He said he can he is sorry, but he needs to take them and he doesn't want me knowing when he takes them and he even hid them in our room.
> Not sure how to feel, do I just let him do his thing and not feel insecure about I? Because this really messes with my head sometimes?
> ...


What you should have done is discuss the pills with our H. Is he experiencing ED? How long has this gone on? Has he consulted his Dr? These the question that should have been asked but apparently not. 

My BIL suffered ED at the age of 36. Found to have low testosterone. I'm 54 and starting to feel some affects of my age in that department.


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## MAJDEATH (Jun 16, 2015)

I don't get the OPs reasoning for being upset and demanding he throw the pills away. My W will say she needs the "blue pill treatment" and we both are left very satisfied. She says it's like cheating with a younger man with a big D 🙂. So maybe you should embrace it!


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