# In Law Trouble.



## gamerchix (Aug 27, 2010)

hello evryone. this is my 1st post and i need advice. 

Ive asked my family and my husband what to do, but it's eating me up inside.

For starters, im 24 and have been married for 4 years. my husband is amazing. there isnt any thing i dont love about him, all except his family. now, i dont wanna bash them, i know im hard to get along with. but from day one, they disliked me. i knew his brother in high school and he had informed them about me, infact they were lies. but why wouldn't they believe him. im new and he was the only one who knew me and i met his brother on myspace. any way, day 1 i was disliked. we dated for 10 months and got married. this is where i was kinda like wtf with how the treated me and my relationship with their son and brother. im not rich, nor is my family. my mom and dad got divorced when i was young and wasnt in the picture (im setting yall up for this) and i needed help paying for the wedding. it was reasonable. i needed 450$ from my family and his and i would cover the rest. well, when i asked them they told me no, they cant afford it they are going to rawhide. (western theme place in az). so i talked to my mother and she simply culdnt do it. my sister and aunts offered to help, but it wasnt enough. there wuld be no way i could do it alone. so i just called it off and went to the court and basically eloped. i was dressed up, my hubby was too, along with my mom and sister, and EVEN my father who got wind of it from my mom. In come the husbands family, dressed like they were stuck out in the desert for weeks. dirty, ripped clothes ect. I was just in awe. even my father asked who they were and when i told him he laughed and said omg (this coming from him i knew it was bad ). 

fast foward to current:

after years of fighting with them and having issues with both sister in law and brother in law, none of which got resolved till june of this year. ive had my issues wth the bil and we worked it out eventually. sil and i have gone back and fourth for the years. we wuld be close then we wuld fight ect. well, she was being greedy and talking to me about said greedy act and i said she needed to stop. well, it went from that to her emailing my sister about something she had on her facebook page. well i didnt appreciate at that since my sister hardly knew her. so i got angry and told her how i felt. word got twisted and such and she told me to bascally never come by the house (my husbands mom, dad, sister, her husband, her 2 kids and now brother and his wife live in the Same house) or there wuld be hell. I let it go, and figured this wuld blow over like everything.
well now, i find out of some nasty emails shes sending to my husband ex gf (his ex from 9 years ago) saying how i was his rebound, how she hates me and how my husband is still in love with her. (the exgf) when i called her out on this, she made accusations on how i hacked her account and how she was gonna have me arrested ( *rolls eyes* ) 

well, my husbands parents never stepped in once to shut her up. in fact the accused me of being manipulative and my husband need to control ME. 

its been about 3 months since this and she refuses to talk to me, and wont let me in the house only my husband. shes turing my husabnds new wife on me by telling lies about how i did things to my husbands neice. (yelling at her deleting her facebook and telling her that she cant see her uncle) (this child is 7 btw)

Im at a loss, i wanted to be part of the family but no matter what i do, im wrong sister in law is right. Im the bad guy. it just kills me cuz im not gonna see them till she acts her age and is willing to discuss this maturely and i know my husband wants to see his mom. he is on my side as is his brother. but his sister keeps running her mouth to everyone. now even his grandparents and aunts dislike me. and ive met them one time for about 30 mins. 

what do i do about this. im just at a loss and i dont know where else to turn for advice.


----------



## cheetahcub (Aug 18, 2010)

Family is very important to all of us, but you and your hub comes first. 
It sounds to me that your husband is the only one that can sort this one out. He shouldn't allow it to go further. If you're not welcome, he's not welcome, and he's not going without you. Unfortunetely, it seems that he hasn't realised this. Being stuck between your family and your wife is not nice at all, and must be killing him, because they seem close. But you should openly discuss the way it makes you feel.

If he confronts his sister, saying that he won't budge if she doesn't change her act, the result would be that she'll say sorry. If she doesn't, there is nothing to do but stay away from there for a while.

When you have to go to birthdays, weddings and so on, be yourself, be helpful in the kitchen, be friendly and ignore her flat, from entering to going. Keep your chin up, she's got issues, not you. Be the better person, for your husband's sake.


----------



## amberlynn (May 24, 2009)

Oh Honey, I feel for you. Im in the same situation, only difference is, my monster in law lives with us, and my brother in law is causing all the drama. He's done the whole posting crap on facebook thing too. He's even gone as far as making threats towards the hubby, told the family that my husband and I dont deserve the baby we have. It just gets worse and worse. We have tried to resolve it, but he doesnt want too. He thinks cause his mom lives with us, he can get by with a bunch of childish crap, so, to fix this problem, his mom is moving into an apartment of her own in Nov-Dec. Ive isolated myself from the drama side of the family. My child doesnt go around them, the hubby doesnt want anything to do with them. We tried to get along with everyone, but my brother in law is so spoiled, and has always gotten everything he wants, that 90% of the family is afraid to stand up to him. He's 20 years old, living in his Aunt's back yard under a bunch of bamboo, doesnt work, refuses to pay taxes, depends on people to buy the things he needs and to feed him. He stays messed up on pot. I know exactly what you're going through. Ive been the "black sheep" of this family for 4 years. I finally grew a backbone and told em all where they could go. It took me tellin the hubby to choose between his mom or me. I had enough of the BS. 

Best advice I can give you, stand your ground, don't let it show that you're upset or that it bothers you. Ive learned that showing your emotions only makes it worse. If you see them out in public, walk the other way, act like you dont know them. It'll get worse before it gets better. Im sorry you're going through this.


----------



## Bluemoon7 (Jan 27, 2010)

I'm sorry you have these people for in-laws. Unfortunately, I completely understand. 

Your husband needs to talk to his sister. She is being incredibly immature and ridiculous to make a disagreement between the two of you public. Honestly, she should be embarrassed because it makes her look bad, regardless of how it might make you look. In the future, don't get too close to her or the rest of the family. Be polite and friendly, but don't let your guard down. Seems like they are drama queens and it's best to keep that to a minimum.


----------



## amberlynn (May 24, 2009)

Bluemoon7 said:


> I'm sorry you have these people for in-laws. Unfortunately, I completely understand.
> 
> Your husband needs to talk to his sister. She is being incredibly immature and ridiculous to make a disagreement between the two of you public. Honestly, she should be embarrassed because it makes her look bad, regardless of how it might make you look. In the future, don't get too close to her or the rest of the family. Be polite and friendly, but don't let your guard down. Seems like they are drama queens and it's best to keep that to a minimum.


:iagree:


----------

