# Nice Thoughts



## mrsbroken (Sep 23, 2009)

Well I have had a nice weekend alittle tried because of our late night at the track fri. night. Brother -in -law won. Hubby had to work Sat morning but after work we went out to eat and did some shopping even though he was tried spend some time at my parents and last night was the first night in mths that I had nice dreams and not of killing/hurting the ow. Maybe this is a sign that am moving on. Today he said he would do anything i wanted to do. I just wish it didn't take a EA for us to grow closer together. I really haven't thought much about her this weekend which has been nice I hope one day that it want be something I think about everyday. What emotions did everyone go through to get over their hubby/wife affair?


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## foolz1 (Sep 5, 2009)

I can only speak for myself, but your feelings are in line with most who have been cheated on. It still bothers me after over a year of knowledge.


mrsbroken said:


> Well I have had a nice weekend alittle tried because of our late night at the track fri. night. Brother -in -law won. Hubby had to work Sat morning but after work we went out to eat and did some shopping even though he was tried spend some time at my parents and last night was the first night in mths that I had nice dreams and not of killing/hurting the ow. Maybe this is a sign that am moving on. Today he said he would do anything i wanted to do. I just wish it didn't take a EA for us to grow closer together. I really haven't thought much about her this weekend which has been nice I hope one day that it want be something I think about everyday. What emotions did everyone go through to get over their hubby/wife affair?


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## Calypso (May 11, 2009)

It's been a little over a year for me too. I can say that I'm 100% better then a year ago at this time. I have no idea but the past couple weeks I've felt so much better. I let go of a lot of anger that I had been holding on to. I still have one issue that is pretty bad for me. I'm working on that one too. We have done a lot of talking and I feel better. Then this weekend I don't know it feels different for me. It's like I went around a corner? Or stepped through a door in my soul that was closed before? All I can say that what ever happened I feel really good. My husband has been really trying. So I will give him half the credit in this step forward for me. I think this time around it's going to be better then ever for us. The affair was a eye opener for our marriage that is for sure. I think for me letting go of the anger is a big step in healing. I almost feel relieved in a way. I hope you can find some peace in yours too.


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## COFLgirl (Oct 9, 2008)

Calypso said:


> It's been a little over a year for me too. I can say that I'm 100% better then a year ago at this time. I have no idea but the past couple weeks I've felt so much better. I let go of a lot of anger that I had been holding on to. I still have one issue that is pretty bad for me. I'm working on that one too. We have done a lot of talking and I feel better. Then this weekend I don't know it feels different for me. It's like I went around a corner? Or stepped through a door in my soul that was closed before? All I can say that what ever happened I feel really good. My husband has been really trying. So I will give him half the credit in this step forward for me. I think this time around it's going to be better then ever for us. The affair was a eye opener for our marriage that is for sure. I think for me letting go of the anger is a big step in healing. I almost feel relieved in a way. I hope you can find some peace in yours too.


Thanks for sharing this calypso, it gives me hope.

It has been 10 months for me and my husband and like you, I can say things are 100% better than a year ago. 

My husband has tried so hard to make up for everything but I think the fact that I am reflecting on how things were a year ago at this time(so bad-he was in the middle of his A), that it is hard for me to move forward.

Several people have told me that at a year after d-day is when things start to improve and I really hope this is the case. I do really well for a few days and then it all comes back again. I know it is the memories of a year ago that are hitting me so hard. No matter what I try to do to minimize the memories and think about how much better we are now, nothing stops the pain. My husband and I have worked very hard to build our marriage since we decided to recover our marriage last December. It has been a bittersweet year. In a lot of ways, my husband and I have discovered the relationship we never had before. We even renewed our wedding vows, my husband's idea But, I have learned you can't have the pleasure without the pain and that is where I am right now...it...just...hurts.

I like what you said about stepping through a door in your soul that was closed before. I hope I get there soon.


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