# Adult Child & Wife



## PioneerJob (Feb 9, 2012)

I want to say im a bit shy about this theres two issues, her and I and my stepson. This will be long. 

About 14yrs ago I met a girl who had come into my work and needed to order somethings and we got talking about how she would need to use them (home equipment). It turned into dating and so forth. She was living with her dad and she had a 5yr old son. She had been divorced from her husband for 3 yrs and I had been single for about a year from a long term relationship. 

As time went on we ended up getting a place together and I soon learned her son had issues (mental). She wasnt sure what they were. So we went through the fun part of dealing with the school calling all the time suspending him and detention etc. It was found he had ADHD, but there was more and at the time no one was sure what it was. After going to 3 specialist they finally decided he is bipolar with ODD. I was like what can we do for him?

Little did I know more was coming down the road after some serious spouts at school and things he ended up in a mental hospital for 3 weeks at age 12. He seemed fair when he came home but nothing "normal". He would see girls on tv and run, he covers his ears when he seems certain things on tv (it wasnt the sounds it was what he saw). The kids picked on him and we were basically forced to a better school, he started out decent but then soon was back to arguring things and saying rules didnt apply to him etc. 

His mother and me had been planning to get him in the hospital again as he was really getting out of control and his counselor had a written a report to have him go in on a monday but that friday he lost it at school and punched the teacher and broke things and had to be grabbed and held to the floor by the school officer and other teachers. He was set to be expelled, however because we were close with the school and they knew what was going on they didnt expell him. He was put into the mental hospital for 4 weeks (this was age 15). Since then hes managed to finish school and is now in community college but theres alot of issues. 

More on that in a sec.. 

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My wife and me have NOT been intimate in over a year. Matter of fact her changing cloths around me is a sin. Its like we are room mates now. We can hang out and have fun but theres nothing more. No kissing, no touching, even hugs are rare. We have gone into odds over this actually for years. I think weve been intimate maybe 5 times in the last 3yrs. I got to wondering if she was cheating on me so I hacked into her facebook and things and found she had mentioned she has no interest in sex or that stuff anymore cut and dry and doesnt see it as a issue that I still would like to be able to. 

To her its not a issue, even though ive tried and have explained to her that its important to me .. she will just say .. "be quiet" and change the subject. I love having a great friend but I want more to. 

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I got sick about 1yr ago and ended up having to leaving work and now am on disability. This has made things for my stepson alot easier he is now 21yrs. He can now go places when he needs to (college, library etc). However he has gotten out of control again ... talking to himself outloud (and answering it), arguring everything, failing classes at college and the big one was walked up to me and pushed me almost to the floor and said we need to buy him a car and that he doesnt need car insurance. I grabbed him and threw him to the bed and said "keep your hands off me and if you do that again the police will come take your a**".

His mom saw the whole thing and instead of talking to him, got mad at me cause I threw him to the bed. Im like where did he come up with just walking in here and saying that. She didnt know, we still dont know. He just walked in the room out of no where and pushed me almost to the floor and said that. Ive told her something needs done with him, he cant live on his own, his real dad doesnt want anything to do with him. Im in no condition to take and handle this anymore. With all thats going on to be honest ... maybe I do need to leave. Ive been a dad to him for many years and I love both her and him but physically and mentally I cant do it anymore. What does one do?


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## accept (Dec 1, 2011)

Youre stuck. Youre best out of it. Try your best to do that.


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## His_Pixie (Jan 29, 2012)

have you tried family and/or couple's counseling?


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## tacoma (May 1, 2011)

You`re being abused by your wife and your step-son and you don`t know what to do?

Leave.


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