# Confronting OM/OW



## Dday (Mar 31, 2013)

Just found out that the OM will be at the same baseball game as me tomorrow night. I don't know if I will be able to hold back my anger if I run into him. My dday was just over a week ago so everything is still fresh in my mind. 

Has anyone had the chance to physically confront the OM/OW?


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## Thorburn (Nov 23, 2011)

Don't. Last year in early January I I left work early bought a fifth of bourbon and drove almost two hours to where the OM (from 2011) worked. The doors at the meat plant were locked and I busted into the building in the back of the plant. No one was there. They were all off site at a holiday party. I called a friend (a Vietnam Vet) who I use to work with and he talked to me and told me to get out and go home. He did not get off the phone till I got home.

I would be in jail.

It is not worth it.


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## Acabado (May 13, 2012)

Think in your kids man. If you trust yourself better remore the bad situation.


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## Kasler (Jul 20, 2012)

Don't definitely not worth it. You would be in jail, AND have to pay for that PoS's medical bills.


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## Will_Kane (Feb 26, 2012)

Dday said:


> Just found out that the OM will be at the same baseball game as me tomorrow night. I don't know if I will be able to hold back my anger if I run into him. My dday was just over a week ago so everything is still fresh in my mind.
> 
> Has anyone had the chance to physically confront the OM/OW?


Is your wife going to be there?

What kind of baseball game?


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## B1 (Jun 14, 2012)

I would say avoid it at all costs, especially now. It's very raw now and you could snap. Don't make things worse by getting arrested.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

Do you have a bail fund or are you going to call *your* bonds men?

Are you made for jail...if you don't have the dough you might even end up in state and thats a whole different ball game.

I know in my state going to county is nothing compared to state. In my state they tac on additional time so 90 can turn into 120 very easily.

If you have enough in savings then confront the OM, with over crowding there is a good chance they will keep you in county and 90 day could turn into 45...

If you have the dough you might be able to stay out of prison and even jail and be on probation for 4 years w/community service.

If I remember Juicer paid $15K to stay out of jail after hitting OM.


Hell you might not even run into OM.....

And if you do smile lift your hand high in the air and and raise your middle finger....maybe he will take a swing then you take the fall and really have a good time with his @ss.

Just remember even if you can take a bunch you have to fall to the ground to have a desired effect.

I won't run from the POS much less miss a game


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

Dday said:


> Just found out that the OM will be at the same baseball game as me tomorrow night. I don't know if I will be able to hold back my anger if I run into him. My dday was just over a week ago so everything is still fresh in my mind.
> 
> Has anyone had the chance to physically confront the OM/OW?


Dday: He ain't worth it! Not unless, of course, that you have the internal fortuitive wish to end up behind bars and financing a bunch of legal bills in the criminal courts in the process.

Now I'm only a fan of confrontation when it benefits me, and when there is no other alternative available. In your case, it ain't necessary and I'd even heartily recommend that if you can find something better to do, then just do it.

It doesn't diminish your manhood one iota to walk away from a potential situation that could end up harming you. I'd call it a rather smart move!


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## whatslovegottodowithit? (Jan 6, 2013)

If you're dead set on beating this guy to a pulp, you should make him throw the first punch. What better way to expose the affair then at a baseball game were assumedly many people you and your spouse know will be there. Maybe he cowars and says nothing. Maybe he physically attacks you (with witnesses present) and you have to defend yourself for fear of your life.

I know where you are coming from guy. This POS OM messed with your life, but you still have it. Avoid being physical unless he attacks you first and then no beating him too bad!


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## arked (Mar 2, 2013)

POS is not worth it. Don't let your kids down and give your WW something to hold over your head. She will be telling everyone “I told you he was crazy.” and she now has proof. If you cannot keep a lid on your temper do not go to the game. Think long and hard about the end results for you kids will be. You do not want your kids to see their dad in this kind of light. You are a better man than this.


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## Dday (Mar 31, 2013)

whatslovegottodowithit? said:


> If you're dead set on beating this guy to a pulp, you should make him throw the first punch. What better way to expose the affair then at a baseball game were assumedly many people you and your spouse know will be there. Maybe he cowars and says nothing. Maybe he physically attacks you (with witnesses present) and you have to defend yourself for fear of your life.
> 
> I know where you are coming from guy. This POS OM messed with your life, but you still have it. Avoid being physical unless he attacks you first and then no beating him too bad!


Sounds like a plan. Although this isn't the best setting and a good chance we won't bump in to each other. It's the phillies game with about 40,000 other people. But with my luck lately it will happen, by the way tomorrow is my 32nd birthday.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

Maybe you can find something about the affair that you can have put on the jumbo screen?

Something really embarrasing for OM?

LOL


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## Will_Kane (Feb 26, 2012)

If there's supposed to be "no contact," how do you even know the other man will be there?

Did your wife's friend tell her where the other man was going to be tomorrow?


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## whatslovegottodowithit? (Jan 6, 2013)

the guy said:


> Maybe you can find something about the affair that you can have put on the jumbo screen?
> 
> Something really embarrasing for OM?
> 
> LOL


Hmmm...I know here (White Sox, Blackhawks, Bulls, and Bears) will allow messages, for a fee for charity, to be posted on their jumbotron(s). I doubt though that the Phils would allow a post that states "John Doe is a cheating manwh0re"...maybe worth a shot? :rofl:


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## anchorwatch (Mar 5, 2012)

Dday said:


> Sounds like a plan. Although this isn't the best setting and a good chance we won't bump in to each other. It's the phillies game with about 40,000 other people. But with my luck lately it will happen, by the way tomorrow is my 32nd birthday.


If he wore a Met hat you'd have some help. 

Let it go......have a good time!

He already lost. He could only do what he did like a rat in the dark of secrecy. Out in the open, guys like that will run from guys like you. Rats don't like the light of day.


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## bryanp (Aug 25, 2011)

What does your wife have to say about this?


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## workindad (May 7, 2011)

I had a coworker that I used to work with. She cheated on her H. Her H ended up keying OM's car. It was caught on a video camera that BH didn't know was there. Long story short, OM got his car repainted on the BH's dime. BH also had to eat a bunch of sh!t over the deal. Definitely not worth it.


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## MeditMike80 (Dec 29, 2012)

Everyone here is assuming the confrontation should be violent. You should make a print out with his picture (if you have it available) and explain how he and your wife had an affair. Hand it out at the game. Embarrass the hell out of him.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Thorburn (Nov 23, 2011)

I live not far from Citizen's Bank Park if you want give me a call we can go out for coffee. I am free in the evenings and am taking next week off. I am serious, PM me and we can get together if you wish.


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## Thorburn (Nov 23, 2011)

BTW my WS was there with her brother at Saturday's night game. She is a big Phillies fan. I was as well but out of spite I rooting for the Braves this year, or the Yankees, or the Mets, or whoever. JK.


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## frozen (Mar 5, 2012)

*Re: Re: Confronting OM/OW*



the guy said:


> Maybe you can find something about the affair that you can have put on the jumbo screen?
> 
> Something really embarrasing for OM?
> 
> LOL


That is fvking brilliant! Maybe you can get cheaterville.com to buy a an ad, they can call his name A's told him he won a prize and they be named cheater of the day, lol


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## Thorburn (Nov 23, 2011)

Happy birthday Dday.


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## TimesOfChange (Mar 20, 2013)

If you have to, Dday, beat him up verbally, NOT physically. A blow to his ego and reputation will hurt him more than any hit you might score.
But in your case it's fresh and i'd say once you see the guy all your subconscious thoughts might surface, causing you to loose control.
So, if you can pull yourself together, give him a verbal beating, be classy and turn your back on him.
Otherwise, stay away from the OM!


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## Dday (Mar 31, 2013)

Thorburn said:


> Happy birthday Dday.


Thank you!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Dday (Mar 31, 2013)

TimesOfChange said:


> If you have to, Dday, beat him up verbally, NOT physically. A blow to his ego and reputation will hurt him more than any hit you might score.
> But in your case it's fresh and i'd say once you see the guy all your subconscious thoughts might surface, causing you to loose control.
> So, if you can pull yourself together, give him a verbal beating, be classy and turn your back on him.
> Otherwise, stay away from the OM!


I'm not really the yelling type. If we happen to run into each other and he says something or walks towards me I will just drop him before I say anything. There isn't much to say. He has caused me more pain than I could ever cause him by punching him a few dozen times in the face. I was just wondering if it would make me feel better?? Probably not but was just asking if anyone else had the chance. 

But after reading your posts about fines/medical bills/jail time I will probably wait for him to make the first move. I haven't been in a fight in about 13 years haha but I have a pretty good size advantage and a lot more anger. 

Also, why do I have this hatred for him and not my wife?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## livinfree (Sep 7, 2012)

+1 Don't engage. Even if you can control yourself. The OM may not.

Humans are the most unpredictable species.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

Dday said:


> If we happen to run into each other and he says something or walks towards me I will just drop him before I say anything. There isn't much to say. He has caused me more pain than I could ever cause him by punching him a few dozen times in the face. I was just wondering if it would make me feel better?? Probably not but was just asking if anyone else had the chance.
> 
> But after reading your posts about fines/medical bills/jail time I will probably wait for him to make the first move. I haven't been in a fight in about 13 years haha but I have a pretty good size advantage and a lot more anger.
> 
> ...


Let it go, Dday! Not only would you be tied up in Criminal Court facing a count of assault, the mere evidence of the physical act itself would be admissable in Family Court. And culpability could certainly come into play since you are actively discussing and advocating the prospects of such an act.

Walk away~ she ain't worth it! Stay clean and just nail her derriere in Family Court.

The hatred for him, I greatly suspect, is just a "macho" thing~ most men feel that. Hell, I feel that occasionally about my STBXW's fat lardass OM. But then again, the evidence that I have seen thusfar says that she was the one who led him on, as well as her other BF. So I can't really hold either of her gigolo OM accountable!

But if you ever laid eyes on this dude, you would literally laugh out loud. The only thing that I can even suspect that she remotely sees in him is perhaps a large appendage~ but strictly from a physiological standpoint, and by just giving him the gross benefit of the doubt, even that thing has got to be able to clear that fat gut of his in order to be good for anything!


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## Thorburn (Nov 23, 2011)

A friend of mine did 7 years by almost killing the OM. His life was a mess when he got out. Fortunately he was able to put it behind him and he is doing fine now. But he went through years of hel*. He would be the first to tell you it was not worth it.


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## NEVER HAPPEN 2 ME RIGHT? (Sep 28, 2012)

Not worth it man! Don't drop to his level, or give him the satisfaction of causing more harm to your life. There are way more creative, effective and legal ways to even the score, if you are really hung up on it. Take your time, do the research and map it out. Then you can expose what he has done to his friends, family, neighbors and coworkers. Post on cheaterville so it follows him every time he is looking for a job etc.

I think fully exposing who he really is and what he has done is perfectly acceptable if you desire it. Just stay 100% truthful in what you say. Just the facts. Don't embellish it, or make comments on what you think of him. As long as you stick to that, not much recourse for him. It's not slander if it's true.


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## freedom7 (Jul 13, 2012)

I think beating the OM strokes the cheating wife's ego even more than she has already been "stroked". Two guy fighting over "lil ol' me". 
I shook the OM's hand and thanked him for relieving me of a POS wife.


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## Horizon (Apr 4, 2013)

Dday said:


> I'm not really the yelling type. If we happen to run into each other and he says something or walks towards me I will just drop him before I say anything. There isn't much to say. He has caused me more pain than I could ever cause him by punching him a few dozen times in the face. I was just wondering if it would make me feel better?? Probably not but was just asking if anyone else had the chance.
> 
> But after reading your posts about fines/medical bills/jail time I will probably wait for him to make the first move. I haven't been in a fight in about 13 years haha but I have a pretty good size advantage and a lot more anger.
> 
> ...


Dday - Throw a beer in his face and laugh at him. I guess that's assault as well though. Look if you deck the bloke it can go bad as everyone has said. As my old man used to say - if you smack a bloke just remember he can hit the bricks and never wake up. It's that awful catch 22 - wanting to vent your anger and having so much to lose. You have this hatred for many reasons. For me (a week and counting since i discovered the betrayal), it's the risk brought to my family, the humiliation but as I said to my partner - in the bedroom I'm King. I'm not bragging, I don't mean it that way. That's our private realm. It's a special place that is only for us. She allowed this snake into that room and into my head. She polluted the sanctity of that between us all these years - even when that special place was barren it remained a special place. Naturally he as a bloke is going to be the focus of my attention. That's why I confronted him - over the phone. At least he had the snake guts to be explicit, my partner can't handle the truth because she "doesn't want to hurt me". A little late for that Luv.


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## phillybeffandswiss (Jan 20, 2013)

Nope a catch-22 is a situation where both outcomes are bad and out of your control. He has a choice in this matter and a bad outcome is his choice.


Dday said:


> Sounds like a plan. Although this isn't the best setting and a good chance we won't bump in to each other. It's the phillies game with about 40,000 other people. But with my luck lately it will happen, by the way tomorrow is my 32nd birthday.


Seriously? You do know that after the death and brain damage incidents, Ball Parks have zero tolerance for this behavior. 

Put it right out of your mind and enjoy the Baseball game.


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## Dday (Mar 31, 2013)

No confrontation last night at the game. Just a well needed W for the phillies


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

freedom7 said:


> I think beating the OM strokes the cheating wife's ego even more than she has already been "stroked". Two guy fighting over "lil ol' me".
> *I shook the OM's hand and thanked him for relieving me of a POS wife.*


That will be moreso how I would want to do it when and if I ever encounter my STBXW and her "Li'l' Lord Lardass" at some social occasion.

Just walk right up to them, not even giving her the time of day, extend my hand to shake his, and kindly say:

*"Thank you so very much, Lard, for taking her off of my hands~ now, whenever you reach that point in your relationship, that she's become inattentive to your needs or unaffectionate to you, and starts making some of those famous solo "business trips" out of town, you can start to worry about who it is that she's been Facebooking with, texting, or better yet, who she's actually making those out-of-town trips of hers to see. But rest assured, my friend~ it certainly won't be me! Guaranteed!

Oh, and by the way, did you happen to know the other guy from South Texas that she was FBing and seeing, right about the same time that she was making those trips to see you and while being married to me? Well, get her to fill you in about him! Actually, I found it rather interesting that her cell-phone call logs actually had her calling him, much more than me and you combined! In any event, I wouldn't worry all that much about it~ I'd just get checked out occasionally for the presence of STD's. I know that I did, and it came back clean. Give her credit~ she seems to be a "clean cheater!" But if you find that she's not, just call that South Texas buddy of hers and ask for a prescription for some penicillin~ he's in medicine, you know!

And as long as you are on the phone with him, I'd recommend asking him about getting and having him give you that medical check up. Hell, he may even give you both a group rate! After all, in this day and age, one can never really tell!

Well, Y'all have a great life!"*


*Fantasies, Fantasies!*


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