# Is this excuse remotely believable??



## Misery stinks (Oct 21, 2011)

Over the last couple of months I have found out that over the last year my husband has been cheating on me with two women, pretty much at the same time. There was a third female that I found hints of, but I could never prove it or get my husband to admit it so either he hid that one well or there really wasn't anything with the person I found hints off. With her I found texts that seem hard to believe were coming from someone who he'd been completely platonic with for over ten years. The texts from her were: 

"sweet dreams cutie", 
"I'm just sad today and thinking about you... life... regrets", 
"I wish things would have worked out for us",
"just a little lonely", 
"tell me something good" 

As best as I could tell my husband never texted her back except one text stating that "life is never as bad as you think" when she sent a email about being down. My husband swears that this woman had a stroke several months ago and basically her brain has gone haywire ever since and suddenly she started contacting him again even though the last time they dated was over ten years ago, just before he and I started dating. By my request he sent her an email telling her to quit contacting him... in the email he said:

"I know you had a Stroke in the last few months and it made you think about your life. Me and you together was over 10 years ago. It's not going to happen. Please stop txting, email , or calling me." 

She wrote back stating:

"OMG, I am so sorry. Honestly these past few months have kind of seemed like I've been walking in a fog. I barely remember even sending anything to you or calling you. I know you are happy with your life and marriage and I'd never want to do anything to mess with that. I wish you and your family nothing but the best. I'm working on getting my head back on straight and focusing on my family and husband. No worries, you won't hear from me again. I deleted your cell and contact info. 

Again, my apologies"


As I typed that out I realized how absolutely ridiculous it sounds to believe it but I've harassed my husband to no end and he swears up and down that nothing happened and he'd tell me if something had because he doesn't have much to lose at the moment anyway with how bad things are. But how on earth can nothing have happened when she was sending those texts??? I've tried hard though and can't find anything except those texts???

Am I totally nuts if I believe this or does it seem halfway believable?


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## golfergirl (Dec 8, 2010)

Misery stinks said:


> Over the last couple of months I have found out that over the last year my husband has been cheating on me with two women, pretty much at the same time. There was a third female that I found hints of, but I could never prove it or get my husband to admit it so either he hid that one well or there really wasn't anything with the person I found hints off. With her I found texts that seem hard to believe were coming from someone who he'd been completely platonic with for over ten years. The texts from her were:
> 
> "sweet dreams cutie",
> "I'm just sad today and thinking about you... life... regrets",
> ...


Either they're sneaky, conniving liars or this is truth. I'd keep my eyes and ears open and do some snooping to verify, but I wouldn't disbelieve THIS one unless I found more.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## NotLikeYou (Aug 30, 2011)

So your husband was screwing around with 2 women, "pretty much at the same time," and you're spending time trying to figure out whether or not he got physical with a third woman also?

I can't help but think that it would be more productive for you to focus on the two other women that you know about, and the extent of his relations with them.

OW#3 really shouldn't be the deal breaker, either way.....


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## CandieGirl (Apr 27, 2011)

Your husband cheated...isn't that enough proof for you? Not sure what you're expecting to hear. Personally, I'm pretty sure it would be over for us if I found my mate cheating.


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## Misery stinks (Oct 21, 2011)

NotLikeYou said:


> I can't help but think that it would be more productive for you to focus on the two other women that you know about, and the extent of his relations with them.
> 
> OW#3 really shouldn't be the deal breaker, either way.....


You're right and whether it was two women or three does not make a huge difference... either way a cheater is a cheater. If we are going to try to work on somehow rebuilding the marriage then I want to know everything now rather than going through the work of rebuilding a marriage only to realize later that there is even MORE and then basically start right back over again.


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## Misery stinks (Oct 21, 2011)

CandieGirl said:


> Personally, I'm pretty sure it would be over for us if I found my mate cheating.


Have you been cheated on by a spouse? I'm assuming you have been if you're on this forum... I only ask because I know my perspective has changed a lot after actually being in the situation. A year ago if someone were to tell me that their husband had done even half of what my husband has done, I would have told her to get the heck out of that marriage and never look back. But when it comes down to it, and I'm actually in the situation, it's not that simple. With over ten years of building a life together and two children, it's just not as black and white as I would have thought a year ago if someone else were to tell me they were in this situation.


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