# Masturbation after sex



## LeananSidhe (Feb 6, 2018)

This is mostly a question for the men here.

Would it bother you if your partner masturbated after sex? Let’s say you gave her an orgasm or two and then had intercourse and you were finished but she wanted more. Would you be offended? What if it was every night?

Edited to add.... I’m the woman. My husband is great in bed but my sex drive is so high right now that I’m constantly ready to go. 5 minutes after sex is over I start thinking about what we just did or what I want next time and suddenly I’m ready for more.


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## SentHereForAReason (Oct 25, 2017)

Just thinking out loud, if it was every time, I'd start to 2nd guess myself on if I was able to satisfy my partner fully or not, I mean I guess if my partner had a certain way that she could only do herself and really enjoyed it and there was no way ANY partner of hers could do the same, I would get over it but my first thoughts would be ....

- if she could start off with the solo round or have the solo round in the middle
- have me involved in that process, either with a toy or my hand/mouth


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## Volunteer86 (Aug 2, 2017)

Absolutely not my wife has trouble having an orgasm through intercourse so she has to use her vibe after every time we do. It doesn't bother me any. I think it would lead to problems if I didn't let her or didn't want her to myself. 



LeananSidhe said:


> This is mostly a question for the men here.
> 
> Would it bother you if your partner masturbated after sex? Let’s say you gave her an orgasm or two and then had intercourse and you were finished but she wanted more. Would you be offended? What if it was every night?


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## Aspydad (Oct 17, 2013)

LeananSidhe said:


> This is mostly a question for the men here.
> 
> Would it bother you if your partner masturbated after sex? Let’s say you gave her an orgasm or two and then had intercourse and you were finished but she wanted more. Would you be offended? What if it was every night?


If my wife did this, I would absolutely not believe that she had an orgasm with me - chances would be zero % in my opinion.


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## Yeswecan (Jul 25, 2014)

LeananSidhe said:


> This is mostly a question for the men here.
> 
> Would it bother you if your partner masturbated after sex? Let’s say you gave her an orgasm or two and then had intercourse and you were finished but she wanted more. Would you be offended? What if it was every night?


No, I would not be offended. Heck, I would watch! :grin2:


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## LeananSidhe (Feb 6, 2018)

Aspydad said:


> LeananSidhe said:
> 
> 
> > This is mostly a question for the men here.
> ...


That’s what I’m worried about. 😞

I don’t want my husband to worry about that.


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## PigglyWiggly (May 1, 2018)

If it were every night, I would suspect that she wasn't having an orgasm or two every night prior to masturbating. Is the masturbation preferred over the husband giving another orgasm or 2? (general curiosity)


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

LeananSidhe said:


> This is mostly a question for the men here.
> 
> Would it bother you if your partner masturbated after sex? Let’s say you gave her an orgasm or two and then had intercourse and you were finished but she wanted more. Would you be offended? *What if it was every night?*


If something like that happened sometimes, it wouldn't be a problem. But if it happened every night, the routine of a husband being unable to satisfy his spouse on a daily basis would eventually become an emotionally traumatizing way to fall asleep.


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## BarbedFenceRider (Mar 30, 2018)

When I was younger, I had a girlfriend that had a very high libido. She was an Energizer Bunny. And when I was spent, she would either grind herself on my leg (forward projecting clitoral region) or she would lie face down on the mattress and grind herself on her hand. Almost EVERY TIME we did it. Of course, I was young and stupid and just figured, that was how she got off. As long as I got mine, I really didn't care to much. (sorry, young and stupid)

As for my wife now, after the drama last year, sex is vicarious to say the least. When the OM was the issue, I had NO drive at all. And as far as I remember, the wife wasn't even close with me at all. She always swore that she NEVER masturbated and considered it yucky. But I had awoke in the middle of the night to the bed shaking and hearing her moaning away. She still denies it today. But it has happened a few times since.

As our sex returned to a quasi-normal, both working with each other...She now has a few orgasms that cannot be faked (Or she is a better actress than Meg Ryan) and promptly passes out. lol

Sometimes, I don't even get to finish...Then I'M the one going to the shower with Mrs. Handy. lol


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

Aspydad said:


> If my wife did this, I would absolutely not believe that she had an orgasm with me - chances would be zero % in my opinion.



Of course each woman is different, but I can have 2-5 orgasms before and during sex and still want more.

For example, I can have an orgasm or few during foreplay, another few during PIV, but if we then continue PIV for another few minutes so DH can orgasm I will become aroused again and want 1-2 more.


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## LeananSidhe (Feb 6, 2018)

My problem is that I’m nearly always ready to go again immediately after it’s over. I orgasm easily and multiple times. As soon as he finishes I’m happy for a few minutes but then I start thinking about what we just did....then suddenly I’m horny again. I try to get my mind off it but sometimes I have a harder time. He’s helped me out without complaint before but I always worry that he might be feeling bad about it if it happens a lot.

It’s getting out of hand... Last night we had great sex, 5 minutes later he was helping me get off again, then 45 minutes later (after some dirty talk) I was asking to give him a BJ, and afterwards he helped me get off again....and I swear I could have kept going if he wouldn’t have begged me to let him sleep.


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## LeananSidhe (Feb 6, 2018)

PigglyWiggly said:


> If it were every night, I would suspect that she wasn't having an orgasm or two every night prior to masturbating. Is the masturbation preferred over the husband giving another orgasm or 2? (general curiosity)


Oh no. Him doing it is always preferable. But I’m majorly overworking him in the sex department.


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## SentHereForAReason (Oct 25, 2017)

LeananSidhe said:


> My problem is that I’m nearly always ready to go again immediately after it’s over. I orgasm easily and multiple times. As soon as he finishes I’m happy for a few minutes but then I start thinking about what we just did....then suddenly I’m horny again. I try to get my mind off it but sometimes I have a harder time. He’s helped me out without complaint before but I always worry that he might be feeling bad about it if it happens a lot.
> 
> It’s getting out of hand... Last night we had great sex, 5 minutes later he was helping me get off again, then 45 minutes later (after some dirty talk) I was asking to give him a BJ, and afterwards he helped me get off again....and I swear I could have kept going if he wouldn’t have begged me to let him sleep.


That's a good problem to have ... I think!

How old are you and are you on any supplements or is this just always how you have been? My EW and I only averaged sex about once every two months probably but I was ready to go every hour on the hour and when it was over, wanted more within minutes but I think some of that has to do with my exercise regimen and that I take a s-load of supplements that indirectly boost my libido. (lots of protein, creatine, etc).


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## LeananSidhe (Feb 6, 2018)

MJJEAN said:


> Aspydad said:
> 
> 
> > If my wife did this, I would absolutely not believe that she had an orgasm with me - chances would be zero % in my opinion.
> ...


Thank you so much for this! I have been starting to think that something’s wrong with me.


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## PigglyWiggly (May 1, 2018)

LeananSidhe said:


> Oh no. Him doing it is always preferable. But I’m majorly overworking him in the sex department.


how often do you guys have sex?


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## CharlieParker (Aug 15, 2012)

LeananSidhe said:


> Oh no. Him doing it is always preferable. But I’m majorly overworking him in the sex department.


Are you overworking his hands, fingers and/or tongue?


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## LeananSidhe (Feb 6, 2018)

stillfightingforus said:


> LeananSidhe said:
> 
> 
> > My problem is that I’m nearly always ready to go again immediately after it’s over. I orgasm easily and multiple times. As soon as he finishes I’m happy for a few minutes but then I start thinking about what we just did....then suddenly I’m horny again. I try to get my mind off it but sometimes I have a harder time. He’s helped me out without complaint before but I always worry that he might be feeling bad about it if it happens a lot.
> ...


I’m 34 and he’s 35. No supplements or anything. I had a normal, healthy sex drive before we had children. After we had our first baby I was put on birth control and it lowered my drive a lot but we’d still have sex 2-3 times a week. We had 2 more kids and after the last one was born I was on the depo shot and my drive was gone. I was still having sex about once a week but I hated foreplay and didn’t care about orgasming. Just wanted it to be over quickly (but I was still going through the motions because I love my husband and didn’t want to hurt him). 
I just blamed the low drive on having kids but finally decided to go off birth control last year to see if it helped....and now I’m horny all the time. It’s like my body is just so happy to feel good again. Everything feels great and I can’t get enough. I’m having crazy fantasies and weird kinks. I’m sort of hoping that it eventually regulates.


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## SentHereForAReason (Oct 25, 2017)

LeananSidhe said:


> I’m 34 and he’s 35. No supplements or anything. I had a normal, healthy sex drive before we had children. After we had our first baby I was put on birth control and it lowered my drive a lot but we’d still have sex 2-3 times a week. We had 2 more kids and after the last one was born I was on the depo shot and my drive was gone. I was still having sex about once a week but I hated foreplay and didn’t care about orgasming. Just wanted it to be over quickly (but I was still going through the motions because I love my husband and didn’t want to hurt him).
> I just blamed the low drive on having kids but finally decided to go off birth control last year to see if it helped....and now I’m horny all the time. It’s like my body is just so happy to feel good again. Everything feels great and I can’t get enough. I’m having crazy fantasies and weird kinks. I’m sort of hoping that it eventually regulates.


I'm sure it will regulate, gravity eventually gets to everything but enjoy it while you can  Might be the body, chemical makeup and mind overcompensating for the stuff your body was put through with the shot and BC. Would think even when it regulates, it might be a best case scenario where you are just active vs super active and the stuff you guys did during the hyper time will introduce you to things you found you liked that you never thought of before and will carry over when things regulate ... kind of the best of both worlds and a little more rest for your husband.


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

LeananSidhe said:


> He’s helped me out without complaint before but I always worry that he might be feeling bad about it if it happens a lot.


Don't worry about how he feels and tell yourself that you can guess without even asking him... just ask your husband how he feels when certain things happen and take him at his word. 

He may not mind you enjoying yourself, but it may or may not help if you were a little more discrete about it. 

In my marriage things are the other way around. I generally have a much higher libido than my wife. When we discussed urges and desires, and what to do when one of us is not available... my wife told me, "I don't mind you taking care of things on your own, but at the same time it helps if you are discrete about it. If you ask me and I have to say no, that is not an easy thing for me either. You should know by now when it is a good time to get my attention and try to share something together versus knowing when to just enjoy things on your own."

That was a difficult thing for me to process. But over time is is much better that if I know my wife is tired and unavailable that she does not mind me putting some time and energy into just enjoying things on my own. She prefers that I do that discretely. If she asks I can share a discussion about the topic and do not hide anything from her. She does enjoy asking from time to time. She really enjoys hearing about how I enjoy thinking about her and us being together and that no matter what I try to do on my own that none of that comes anywhere close to being with her. 

Regards, 
Badsanta


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## LeananSidhe (Feb 6, 2018)

PigglyWiggly said:


> LeananSidhe said:
> 
> 
> > Oh no. Him doing it is always preferable. But I’m majorly overworking him in the sex department.
> ...


He’s implemented an every other day rule to give himself a break. So normally every other day....but I managed to get it twice Tuesday night and twice Thursday night (second time was just oral). 
Sometimes I can get it more on the weekend. (Yay! It’s friday!)



CharlieParker said:


> LeananSidhe said:
> 
> 
> > Oh no. Him doing it is always preferable. But I’m majorly overworking him in the sex department.
> ...


Everything!! I orgasm easy but I’ve become pretty greedy and almost always want more.


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## LeananSidhe (Feb 6, 2018)

badsanta said:


> LeananSidhe said:
> 
> 
> > He’s helped me out without complaint before but I always worry that he might be feeling bad about it if it happens a lot.
> ...


Thank you! This is helpful because I can relate to your wife. I went through several years of low drive (because of birth control). My husband and I were still having sex about once a week or so but I knew he wanted it more and knew that he was doing things himself sometimes...but I appreciated him being discreet because I felt like a failure knowing that I wasn’t satisfying his needs. 

So maybe I’ll just find a way to be more discreet. A new shower head perhaps! 😉 lol


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## Buffon06 (Aug 14, 2016)

Recently, we had sex where I gave her 3 or 4 orgasms via oral on her cl!t with penetration from a vibe, then PIV where she held the vibe on her cl!t whereby she had 2 or 3 more orgasms. I went to the bathroom, and when I came out she was working herself over with the vibe because she wanted more.

I would be on cloud 9 if she did this all the time, it would mean that she was in a perfect mindset/bodyset for great sex and multiple orgasms. This was a major step forward for us after my wife had a life-threatening medical emergency last year and was in the ICU for over a month. We went a long time without sex, then for a long time it was super-awkward for both of us (she had painful PIV), and it was only recently that she was able to have orgasms again. The only issue is that she now requires a specific set of sex acts, in a specific order, for a specific amount of time before she will orgasm, which makes it somewhat routine and predictable, but it's so much better than where we were several months ago.

I no longer take great sex and her orgasms for granted. She can use the vibe for as long as she wants to after partnered sex (PIV) and I have no problem with it whatsoever.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

As has been mentioned, this is one if those good problems to have!

At 35, if both of your schedules allow many in that age group are good for every night. There may be addl impact if encounters start too late every night. For W and I we have sex most every night but I implemented a rule long ago that our time starts no later than 8pm. Weekends morning sex in addition is a regular as well.

W has 1 to 3 Os before me, in varying positions, my (although this sounds clinical) objective is always to wear her out prior to me or plan the last near me. Average is 2 to 3. 
And for data purposes...were in our 50s, and know each others body very well, M first 33yrs. Have 2 kids/grandkids, empty nesters...
PS also for data, it was harder to schedule when kids were young but we were adaptive. We got married young and I've got to admit she and I are fortunate to be paired up. She's great. I'm the one who does dumb stuff time to time, but not in the "straying" dept....

We use vibrator in varying play times on her a few times a month. Tons of fun. I like that, myself. I have doubles regularly because we spoon afterwards and that can restart things. W doesn't mind on some nights if I wake up in middle of the night and want to just because we can....
That's a hold over from long ago single days.

Wow, that's a lot of data 
The key is you'll continue to get more/keep in synch with H as long as you communicate openly and don't let things fester or let any "new" problem, sex or unrelated, become an "old" continuous problem.

A suggestion is never let the kids or "stuff" become a continuous higher priority than H, and vice-versa. Keep each other motivated. You are each others biggest fan in life, don't let that change. Love shows itself in any ltr. Spend time with one another, even if not having sex right then.

Good luck! Yay to you both!


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

LeananSidhe said:


> I’m 34 and he’s 35.
> 
> ....and now I’m horny all the time. It’s like my body is just so happy to feel good again. Everything feels great and I can’t get enough. I’m having crazy fantasies and weird kinks. I’m sort of hoping that it eventually regulates.





LeananSidhe said:


> I orgasm easy but I’ve become pretty greedy and almost always want more.


There's nothing wrong with you. I had the same "problem" when I was your age. That's also about how old I was when I got into BDSM and a few other kinks. It's fairly common for women to hit their sexual peak about mid-30's, some a few years earlier and some a few years later.

I'm 43 now and it's regulated a bit. By that I mean I could happily have sex every day, but am ok waiting a day or two in between romps.


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## BarbedFenceRider (Mar 30, 2018)

I wonder, did OP's doctor tell her about the reduced libido when she signed up for the depo shot? Talk about a birth control?! Hard to get pregnant when NO sex occurs due to dead bedroom! lol

My wife currently is dealing with abnormal periods and heavy flow. It looks like she will be getting surgery at the end of the year. 3 mos. recovery was mentioned. Suck city.

I am doing the research and it looks like her drive might tank as well... And with my workout regimen like others, my drive at 43 is flying high. I also take protein and other supplements. I might be here on this site after the new year as well.

As for OP, even with the kids, she is able to have an active sex life with hubby and is concerned with his well being. That is A-okay in my book. Keep up the communication with him, and nothing should be held back. Clear, concise and thoughtful will win the day....That's what I would want.


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## LeananSidhe (Feb 6, 2018)

MJJEAN said:


> LeananSidhe said:
> 
> 
> > I’m 34 and he’s 35.
> ...


Thanks. That’s where I hope to be eventually. On one hand, I’m loving this feeling because my drive was gone for so long. On the other hand, I do worry that my husband will end up feeling that he’s not enough for me. We went for so long with him being the higher drive partner that I think he feels weird having to be the one who needs a break. He keeps talking about being “old” and tired. This has been going on for probably 6 months now and I think it still surprises him sometimes how much I want it. 

It’s kind of funny how the tables have turned. A few nights ago I had a really bad headache. I still sort of wanted sex but knew it was probably a bad idea. He held me and massaged my forehead until we fell asleep. The next morning he kept talking about how good it felt just to cuddle and be close. It made me chuckle because a couple years ago I was the one complaining that we never just cuddled without him wanting sex. Lol. 

Maybe my crazy sex drive is the perfect storm of no more birth control plus mid thirties spike. It’s super distracting right now though. Especially having 3 young children. 
“Stay here and watch this movie while mommy takes another shower...” ugh.


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## LeananSidhe (Feb 6, 2018)

BarbedFenceRider said:


> I wonder, did OP's doctor tell her about the reduced libido when she signed up for the depo shot? Talk about a birth control?! Hard to get pregnant when NO sex occurs due to dead bedroom! lol
> 
> My wife currently is dealing with abnormal periods and heavy flow. It looks like she will be getting surgery at the end of the year. 3 mos. recovery was mentioned. Suck city.
> 
> ...


Thank you. No, my doctor never mentioned anything about my sex drive lowering. In fact, after our 2nd child was born I brought it up with my obgyn and he brushed it off and told me that it was normal after having kids and getting older (I was 28 or 29 at the time). That was when I was still on the pill. I started the depo shot in 2016. I asked about the side effects and were told that they were greatly exaggerated and “most women” had no ill effects. I have talked to 3 other women on the shot and all 3 say they have zero sex drive. 
I stopped getting the shot in July 2017 and a few months later I started enjoying sex again.


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti (Apr 23, 2017)

LeananSidhe said:


> This is mostly a question for the men here.
> 
> Would it bother you if your partner masturbated after sex? Let’s say you gave her an orgasm or two and then had intercourse and you were finished but she wanted more. Would you be offended? What if it was every night?


Not offended... or even slighted at all.

I know my wife isn't always going to have an orgasm when we have intercourse. I have offered to continue stimulate here manually if she so desires. I have also said it's okay if she wants to finish herself. 

Now in your scenario, if she'd already had an orgasm or two and still wanted more and I wasn't up to the task, then I certainly wouldn't be upset. If she's that insatiable, then I've simply married an exceptional specimen and would be happy to try to keep up, and when I did finally have to tap out, more power to her. Rock on! 

And even if exhausted beyond any ability to participate further, how cool if she'd let me watch!

Now, setting aside any delusions of my sexual grandeur, I would probably have to admit that if this was the routine _every night_, it'd likely get tiresome at some point. But as someone who's had a marriage most often at the other end of the sexual spectrum, I'm pretty sure I'd be happy to give this one a go.


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## Lurkster (Feb 8, 2016)

Not offended in the slightest. When my wife discovered she could have more than one O, she also found out she sometimes wanted many....a lot....several.
And sometimes, I'm drained....literally. 

Out comes the wand, and then cums the wife again!


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## Blaine (Jul 23, 2015)

In my opinion, I would start to wonder if it was every nite. I would also ask her to teach me so I help or do it for her. I would also wonder if there was something else going on. Anything from a fantasy she is obsessed with to is are her orgasms satisfying her. Women's orgasms seem to have a wider variety of intenseness and even some women don't recognize this especially depending on age and experience. So it sounds like there is more than meets the eye going on


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti (Apr 23, 2017)

LeananSidhe said:


> That’s what I’m worried about. 😞
> 
> I don’t want my husband to worry about that.


Don't assume. Talk to him. Let him know what you're feeling and desiring. I think most guys would be pretty receptive. You seem to have a very strong drive. Satisfying that is something you can work on together. There is potential her for additional bonding! A much easier situation to deal with than the opposite where one partner has no drive or desire.


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## Edo Edo (Feb 21, 2017)

LeananSidhe said:


> This is mostly a question for the men here.
> 
> Would it bother you if your partner masturbated after sex? Let’s say you gave her an orgasm or two and then had intercourse and you were finished but she wanted more. Would you be offended? What if it was every night?



If it became a habit, I may question if there was something more I could do to please her. But at the end of the day, as long as our sex life does not suffer at all, it's my wife's business how and when she wants to masturbate. I consider masturbation to be her own personal business (unless she volunteers to make me part of it), so if everything else is going fine, I can't see why I'd have any problems with this...


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## PigglyWiggly (May 1, 2018)

Just spitballing here but could you really be craving more foreplay and intimacy? I sometimes think I want more PiV sex when what i am really craving is more intimacy. When you are having sex, do you feel like your husband is enthusiastic and really into you? Do you incorporate a vibe during your sex with your husband?


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## VermiciousKnid (Nov 14, 2017)

It doesn't bother me. It took me years to get my wife to masturbate in front of me. Let's be honest. It takes men 3-10 minutes to finish. It takes women usually a lot longer. The times don't line up. If I did oral on her before we had sex, and she already had an orgasm, then she never masturbates. When there's occasions for quickies, she can't finish in 5 minutes so she uses her fingers or breaks out the egg. Sometimes I hold it for her. If a man has self-esteem and is secure in his relationship, it shouldn't bother him. If he's not, he might take offense.


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

LeananSidhe said:


> Thanks. That’s where I hope to be eventually. On one hand, I’m loving this feeling because my drive was gone for so long. On the other hand, I do worry that my husband will end up feeling that he’s not enough for me. We went for so long with him being the higher drive partner that I think he feels weird having to be the one who needs a break. He keeps talking about being “old” and tired. This has been going on for probably 6 months now and I think it still surprises him sometimes how much I want it.
> 
> It’s kind of funny how the tables have turned. A few nights ago I had a really bad headache. I still sort of wanted sex but knew it was probably a bad idea. He held me and massaged my forehead until we fell asleep. The next morning he kept talking about how good it felt just to cuddle and be close. It made me chuckle because a couple years ago I was the one complaining that we never just cuddled without him wanting sex. Lol.
> 
> ...


My DH has mentioned needing a break here and there because he's "not 24 or even 34 anymore." We abstain for a couple days every once in a while so he can rest.

I had my kids young. When the last one was born I was 25 and had a tubal so I wouldn't have to worry about birth control again. I've always had a decently high sex drive naturally and never went through a hormonal birth control induced low/no libido stage. Even so, I was shocked at how high my drive went in my mid-30's. I think it's best described like being a stereotypical teenager boy. You're so horny sometimes keeping a train of thought is an effort, you're thinking about sex at frequent random times throughout the day, a breeze will arouse you, you're easily distracted, etc. 

When d I was going through the beginnings I'd save it up all day and unleash it on DH when he got home. I'd be painfully aroused waiting to pounce, lol.

"Kids, stay here and watch this while Mommy and Dad go talk about ...ummm.... stuff..."


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## LeananSidhe (Feb 6, 2018)

PigglyWiggly said:


> Just spitballing here but could you really be craving more foreplay and intimacy? I sometimes think I want more PiV sex when what i am really craving is more intimacy. When you are having sex, do you feel like your husband is enthusiastic and really into you? Do you incorporate a vibe during your sex with your husband?


Yes, he’s very enthusiastic. He’s always been a great lover. He loves giving oral sex and making me orgasm. He’s really been loving how responsive I am now. 
We are also a very loving and affectionate couple. As soon as the kids are in bed we are in our bedroom cuddling and watching tv or talking.

It’s just that I’m horny all the time right now. We can finish and I’m laying there all happy and content and then I think “That was great...I really loved when he did that one thing...” and then suddenly I’m ready again.
Or sometimes we are done and I’m already thinking about what I want next time! 

And he just texted me and said that he thinks he’s sick. The good wife part of me is trying to just be concerned for him...but another part is feeling extra pouty about not getting any.


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## colingrant (Nov 6, 2017)

LeananSidhe said:


> This is mostly a question for the men here.
> 
> Would it bother you if your partner masturbated after sex? Let’s say you gave her an orgasm or two and then had intercourse and you were finished but she wanted more. Would you be offended? What if it was every night?


No. That would tell me my partner is horny as hell and that would excite me beyond belief. But then again, I'm hypersexual and I would assume she is also, which again, is what I would want.


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## LeananSidhe (Feb 6, 2018)

I don’t actually have any toys at all. I probably need to look into getting something...


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## Vinnydee (Jan 4, 2016)

I lived with my wife and a girlfriend we shared. Both girls are bi and long time friends. We would have a threesome, then each girl would have sex with me privately. Some days there was sex earlier in the day. Yet each night before I went to sleep, I masturbated. None of us saw any problem with masturbation or felt insecure if any of us masturbated after sex. Masturbation is different than sex with another. Sometimes better, sometimes not. It allows you to fantasize and only focus on yourself. You can play with yourself exactly the way that if best for you on any given day. In fact, sometimes our sex was just mutual masturbation because as good as I was, I could not compete with a vibrator.

Sex with another is a physical expression of love and giving each other mutual pleasure. Masturbation is solely for sexual pleasure think of a movie star perhaps, a guy/girl you saw today or doing things that you cannot do with your partner. 

My wife and I both know we masturbate. In fact I buy all the vibrators for my wife. She never bought one for herself. When we met she was a 19 year old virgin who never masturbated or had an orgasm. Very different from the type of girls I used to date. A few weeks ago I told her she was being very greedy because she had 10 orgasms that week and I only had 3. Her reply was that it was only ten that I knew of and then she smiled. I did not care at all. 

Some feel that they should be the only giver of sexual pleasure as if they are the best sex partners in the world. That is wishful thinking. Other feel insecure and worry about who their partner is thinking about when they masturbate. If they are going to cheat, they will cheat wether they masturbate or not. In fact, masturbation is a safer way to deal with attraction to someone else compared to the alternative of actually having sex with another. We all get attracted to others. It is natural. Even people married to the most attractive people in the world get attracted to others. 

Either insecurity or ego are the reasons most object to their partners masturbating before, during or after sex. I make my wife orgasm 1-2 times in under a few minutes and they are intense and yet most times she will grab her vibrator to have another orgasm which is even more intense than the ones I give her. I encourage it and do not feel threatened by it. No one can compare to masturbation where everything and anything is possible and your imagination can run wild. It is a different kind of sex that no one can provide to another. 

If you are worried that you are not satisfying her, talk to her about it. My wife and I are very open about our sexual needs. However I cannot compete with her masturbation fantasies or her vibrator unless I could give her the same pleasure as 3 men and 3 women in bed attending to all of her erogenous zones at once in a hotel penthouse. Apples and oranges so don't sweet it. I used to masturbate after having sex with very hot girls after sex with them when I got home. Does not mean that she was not great in bed. Don't worry, be happy that your spouse is still turned on by you after sex. Men will masturbate after an orgy. I know that I used to back in the day. Has nothing to do with the performance of the sex partners I had just had.


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## LeananSidhe (Feb 6, 2018)

MJJEAN said:


> LeananSidhe said:
> 
> 
> > Thanks. That’s where I hope to be eventually. On one hand, I’m loving this feeling because my drive was gone for so long. On the other hand, I do worry that my husband will end up feeling that he’s not enough for me. We went for so long with him being the higher drive partner that I think he feels weird having to be the one who needs a break. He keeps talking about being “old” and tired. This has been going on for probably 6 months now and I think it still surprises him sometimes how much I want it.
> ...


Teenage boy is a perfect analogy. I feel like a horny teenage boy who just started having sex and now can’t get enough of it. We’ll have sex and 5 minutes later I’m thinking “Next time I want to try...”


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## LeananSidhe (Feb 6, 2018)

Vinnydee said:


> I lived with my wife and a girlfriend we shared. Both girls are bi and long time friends. We would have a threesome, then each girl would have sex with me privately. Some days there was sex earlier in the day. Yet each night before I went to sleep, I masturbated. None of us saw any problem with masturbation or felt insecure if any of us masturbated after sex. Masturbation is different than sex with another. Sometimes better, sometimes not. It allows you to fantasize and only focus on yourself. You can play with yourself exactly the way that if best for you on any given day. In fact, sometimes our sex was just mutual masturbation because as good as I was, I could not compete with a vibrator.
> 
> Sex with another is a physical expression of love and giving each other mutual pleasure. Masturbation is solely for sexual pleasure think of a movie star perhaps, a guy/girl you saw today or doing things that you cannot do with your partner.
> 
> ...


I’m the “her”. 🙂
I was just worried that my husband might start feeling insecure. I’m going to talk to him about it later.


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti (Apr 23, 2017)

LeananSidhe said:


> Yes, he’s very enthusiastic. He’s always been a great lover. He loves giving oral sex and making me orgasm. He’s really been loving how responsive I am now.
> We are also a very loving and affectionate couple. As soon as the kids are in bed we are in our bedroom cuddling and watching tv or talking.
> 
> It’s just that I’m horny all the time right now. We can finish and I’m laying there all happy and content and then I think “That was great...I really loved when he did that one thing...” and then suddenly I’m ready again.
> ...


Being sick never stopped me. My wife used to joke that I could be drawing my last breath on my death bed and one organ would still be functioning at peak efficiency and making demands.


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## 269370 (Dec 17, 2016)

LeananSidhe said:


> This is mostly a question for the men here.
> 
> Would it bother you if your partner masturbated after sex? Let’s say you gave her an orgasm or two and then had intercourse and you were finished but she wanted more. Would you be offended? What if it was every night?




That’s a question above my pay grade...

My wife usually comes once or twice (usually either from clit stimulation or g spot) but never more than once from the same stimulation in the same space.

I would probably feel she was not satisfied with her first orgasm if she wanted more. If she kept wanting it...I don’t know. I suppose there are two ways to look at this: you can either take it personally or you can maybe look at it as a type of ‘condition’ and not take it personally.
Can you not ‘keep it in your pants’ till the next time? 


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## LeananSidhe (Feb 6, 2018)

Rocky Mountain Yeti said:


> Being sick never stopped me. My wife used to joke that I could be drawing my last breath on my death bed and one organ would still be functioning at peak efficiency and making demands.


I wish that was the case. Lol. He says he’s very achy and feels feverish so he’ll probably be too miserable. I might be able to tempt him with something extra naughty but I’d feel kind of guilty.


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## BluesPower (Mar 27, 2018)

LeananSidhe said:


> This is mostly a question for the men here.
> 
> Would it bother you if your partner masturbated after sex? Let’s say you gave her an orgasm or two and then had intercourse and you were finished but she wanted more. Would you be offended? What if it was every night?


If we are talking the female her and you are the male, then you are not getting the job done. 

And that does not even include the fact that I bet there was not enough foreplay to start off with in the first place. 

And no you do not get upset, you help her reach the amount of O's that she wants. 

First rule of sex, "It is all about her needs, now and forever." 

So if this is you, buddy you need to step up your game. Long foreplay, get the toys that she likes, and make her happy. 

Your goal is to leave your woman breathless, EVERY TIME YOU HAVE SEX WITH HER. Or, some say a pool of quivering flesh when you are done. 

If you are not doing that, get busy learning how...


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti (Apr 23, 2017)

BluesPower said:


> *If we are talking the female her and you are the male, then you are not getting the job done.
> *
> And that does not even include the fact that I bet there was not enough foreplay to start off with in the first place.
> 
> ...


Sooooo...... 

You really weren't paying attention, eh? 

Read a bit more and try to understand; then your advice may be worth paying attention to.


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## 269370 (Dec 17, 2016)

BluesPower said:


> First rule of sex, "It is all about her needs, now and forever."




Actually that’s also not always the case...as I eventually discovered to my surprise.

Sometimes, the woman wants nothing more than for you to take her, selfishly, ‘use’ her, solely for your own gratification, and then just leave her lying there...

I know, it’s very contradictory to what one is normally taught to believe but I blame it on evolution.



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## LeananSidhe (Feb 6, 2018)

I edited the original post to clarify that I’m the woman in this scenario. 🙂


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## BluesPower (Mar 27, 2018)

inmyprime said:


> Actually that’s also not always the case...as I eventually discovered to my surprise.
> 
> Sometimes, the woman wants nothing more than for you to take her, selfishly, ‘use’ her, solely for your own gratification, and then just leave her lying there...
> 
> I know, it’s very contradictory to what one is normally taught to believe but I blame it on evolution.


Yes this is true, but when you are doing that, you are meeting her needs, because that is what she needs at that point in time. 

And to OP and RMI, BF or H is not getting the job done properly. He should start doing better and sure he can take a break and watch for a while, but then he needs to saddle up and get busy...


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## 269370 (Dec 17, 2016)

BluesPower said:


> Yes this is true, but when you are doing that, you are meeting her needs, because that is what she needs at that point in time.
> 
> 
> 
> And to OP and RMI, BF or H is not getting the job done properly. He should start doing better and sure he can take a break and watch for a while, but then he needs to saddle up and get busy...




Haha, I’m sure you would do it much better 

I don’t think the question was whether he is doing it right or not. But whether he might be offended (or we might be offended).

It actually doesn’t really matter what we would do though or how we would feel, does it? Your husband is your husband.

It sounds like your jump in sex drive is (possibly) temporary and perhaps he realises that it’s not really anything to do with him that he might not be doing right, just that your body is a certain way at this point in time.

Maybe he should use toys on you first and then maybe do whatever it is you guys do. You need to work out what your appetite actually requires; if it is more or less constant, then it’s easier to figure out. If it varies a lot, then I don’t think he will be offended.


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## 247769 (May 18, 2016)

I believe I would take it as a challenge to go for another round, but I'm HD so I would appreciate it, other men might not. You'll have to ask him what he thinks after all he's going to be seeing it happen. I did this once and my wife didn't take it well. She said it made her feel inadequate.

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## AlbinoLion (Mar 16, 2015)

With my W, I typically start with foreplay that includes several orgasms, then I penetrate her and we both have our final orgasm. In the rare instances that she does want to climax again, most of the time I get involved and help her, however, in rare circumstances she'll want to go at it alone, however, I still attempt to coax her along by doing something she likes.


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

I am really appalled at how often doctors don't know, or don't tell patients about the sexual side effects of medications. I think many lives have been ruined this way.

I'm very glad you have your interest back. (and am terribly jealous of your husband).



LeananSidhe said:


> Thank you. No, my doctor never mentioned anything about my sex drive lowering. In fact, after our 2nd child was born I brought it up with my obgyn and he brushed it off and told me that it was normal after having kids and getting older (I was 28 or 29 at the time). That was when I was still on the pill. I started the depo shot in 2016. I asked about the side effects and were told that they were greatly exaggerated and “most women” had no ill effects. I have talked to 3 other women on the shot and all 3 say they have zero sex drive.
> I stopped getting the shot in July 2017 and a few months later I started enjoying sex again.


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

As to the original question, I wouldn't mind at all as long as she made it clear that it wasn't because I was lacking in some way. I'd enjoy it even more if I could help a bit, even I had been totally exhausted by the previous activities. Heck if I was watching here, I might regain interest ,no matter how tired I was....

I would also want to hear any fantasies - there might be some I would turn down, but many I wouldn't, and none would offend me.


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## JustTheWife (Nov 1, 2017)

I sometimes do this (always secretly) even after good sex. Actually I think i want to even more after good sex where i've orgasmed more than once. Sex has always been very emotional for me and i think it helps me release some of that emotion to have an orgasm alone.


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## 269370 (Dec 17, 2016)

JustTheWife said:


> I sometimes do this (always secretly) even after good sex. Actually I think i want to even more after good sex where i've orgasmed more than once. Sex has always been very emotional for me and i think it helps me release some of that emotion to have an orgasm alone.




How do you do it ‘secretly’? Do you leave he room or wait till he falls asleep?
I sometimes do it in the bed but it always wakes her up and she just ignores it and the next day gives me a hard time about it. 

Which is something I also don’t get: on the one hand there’s a desire to ‘control and own’ my orgasms, on the other hand, if she knows I’m horny, something should be done about it and not ignored...But you can’t ignore it and then not let the person seek a real ease: that feels almost abusive...(she’s not; it happens rarely and it’s an instinctive reaction: I think once she had a chance to think about it, she realises how ridiculous the reaction is. At least I hope so...).


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## JustTheWife (Nov 1, 2017)

inmyprime said:


> How do you do it ‘secretly’? Do you leave he room or wait till he falls asleep?
> I sometimes do it in the bed but it always wakes her up and she just ignores it and the next day gives me a hard time about it.
> 
> Which is something I also don’t get: on the one hand there’s a desire to ‘control and own’ my orgasms, on the other hand, if she knows I’m horny, something should be done about it and not ignored...But you can’t ignore it and then not let the person seek a real ease: that feels almost abusive...(she’s not; it happens rarely and it’s an instinctive reaction: I think once she had a chance to think about it, she realises how ridiculous the reaction is. At least I hope so...).
> ...


I've kept it a secret all different ways. Depending on the situation it can be very subtle. I cum easily so I can do it without much notice and certainly can do it without waking someone up. I guess i've had a lot of practice masturbating secretly in all kinds of situations, not just after sex.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*Not in the least! 

Sex is primarily a participatory sport, so I'd like to be participating just as soon as my physical resolve returned. 

And While I may temporarily be in a state of not being fully prepared to have another "Big O" myself, I'd absolutely love to help my better half achieve succeeding Shangri-La's in any viable way possible, whether it's participating or watching!*


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## hairyhead (Oct 30, 2015)

I'd get down there and help out with my tongue!

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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

LeananSidhe said:


> This is mostly a question for the men here.
> 
> Would it bother you if your partner masturbated after sex? Let’s say you gave her an orgasm or two and then had intercourse and you were finished but she wanted more. Would you be offended? What if it was every night?
> 
> Edited to add.... I’m the woman. My husband is great in bed but my sex drive is so high right now that I’m constantly ready to go. 5 minutes after sex is over I start thinking about what we just did or what I want next time and suddenly I’m ready for more.


I'm your male counterpart so I get it and probably wouldn't be offended, but I would want to put out for my mate so I wouldn't stop the play until the damsel was totally rescued from the horny dragon 🐲 that was keeping her captive.:wink2:

I often MB two or three times after sex.


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

LeananSidhe said:


> I don’t actually have any toys at all. I probably need to look into getting something...


In my opinion you should get your husband involved in helping you pick out something. That way whatever is decided, hopefully you will feel as though he cares about and is accepting of your desires even when/if he is not available.

My advice would also be to look into the category of things that can be used alone or as a couple. That way you can enjoy whatever it is together first and then you can try to recreate some of that moment later when you are on your own. 

Regards, 
Badsanta


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## LeananSidhe (Feb 6, 2018)

badsanta said:


> LeananSidhe said:
> 
> 
> > I don’t actually have any toys at all. I probably need to look into getting something...
> ...


I showed him what I ordered so hopefully he’ll want to play around with me. 

He does help out a lot but honestly I feel guilty. I feel like he’s going to get sick of me always being horny. It’s a weird situation. I think we just need to get used to the way things are now (with my drive being so high).


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

Since I'm the high drive one in my relationship, I have trouble imagining getting sick of a horny partner - but of course it can happen and does happen to men. 







LeananSidhe said:


> I showed him what I ordered so hopefully he’ll want to play around with me.
> 
> He does help out a lot but honestly I feel guilty. I feel like he’s going to get sick of me always being horny. It’s a weird situation. I think we just need to get used to the way things are now (with my drive being so high).


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

LeananSidhe said:


> I showed him what I ordered so hopefully he’ll want to play around with me.


One important thing I will advise you is to set your expectations to zero and anticipate a 50/50 chance that whatever you purchased that you may end up just tossing it into the trash. 

Sex toys are like specialty pastries at a coffee shop. They all look great when you are window shopping, but you'll likely need to try a few different things until you find something yummy and repeatable. 

Gosh this organic blueberry key-lime cheescake with orange zest meringue topping has 1000s of reviews and apparently is all the rage!!!










Can't wait to try it!!!!!! 

...well that was different... Perhaps I should have just ordered the vanilla ice cream!


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## Randy2 (Jul 19, 2016)

LeananSidhe said:


> I could have kept going if he wouldn’t have begged me to let him sleep.


If he says he's fine with it, just let him sleep and get yourself off, maybe go into another room if you need to be loud or bouncin' around.
If he's not fine with it, you've got some talking to do.
I expect there will come a time AGAIN when your roles are flipped. You might include that possibility in the conversation.


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## BioFury (Jul 9, 2015)

LeananSidhe said:


> My problem is that I’m nearly always ready to go again immediately after it’s over. I orgasm easily and multiple times. As soon as he finishes I’m happy for a few minutes but then I start thinking about what we just did....then suddenly I’m horny again. I try to get my mind off it but sometimes I have a harder time. He’s helped me out without complaint before but I always worry that he might be feeling bad about it if it happens a lot.
> 
> It’s getting out of hand... Last night we had great sex, 5 minutes later he was helping me get off again, then 45 minutes later (after some dirty talk) I was asking to give him a BJ, and afterwards he helped me get off again....and I swear I could have kept going if he wouldn’t have begged me to let him sleep.


You sound like the woman @ConanHub has wondered about >

But you don't sound that unreasonable, at least to me. You might just need to spread out these romps through out the day, rather than late at night.



LeananSidhe said:


> I don’t actually have any toys at all. I probably need to look into getting something...


I've heard a lot of good things about the Magic Wand, formerly the Hitachi Magic Wand. You might give it a shot.


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## LeananSidhe (Feb 6, 2018)

BioFury said:


> But you don't sound that unreasonable, at least to me. You might just need to spread out these romps through out the day, rather than late at night.


Unfortunately that’s not usually possible. He works all day and we also have 3 young kids. So night is normally our only sexy time except for Sunday morning quickies.


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## BioFury (Jul 9, 2015)

LeananSidhe said:


> Unfortunately that’s not usually possible. He works all day and we also have 3 young kids. So night is normally our only sexy time except for Sunday morning quickies.


Have you ever sat down to see if you have a wall? In other words, masturbating over and over again to see if you can reach a place of satisfaction? There are women who's erotic energy is pretty much unlimited, but you just might have a lot of it. If you found out that after a certain amount of orgasms, you felt fine, then that might help you address the problem you're having with your husband. In that you would at least know how much you need.


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## SkiLifer (Jun 3, 2018)

My wife masturbates more then most women I know. Sometimes after sex she'll masturbate another 30-45 minutes. You're not alone and I wouldn't feel bad. 

After our first baby a switch went off in her. I'll walk upstairs after she comes home from work and her vibrators on in between her legs with her work clothes still on.


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## Mr.Married (Feb 21, 2018)

I didn't read the whole thread but it wouldn't bother me. I'd rather know my wife is "getting her fill" around me than directing it elsewhere. Even though my wife is a one and done
girl it still takes her a long time to come down off of her sexual feelings. That being said it is easy for me to see how you still need to continue. I don't see this situation as a 
problem unless one of you is creating it to be one in your mind. Trying to apply analytical reasoning to things sexual is often a step in the wrong direction. I believe your
situation just "is what it is" and no more thought required.


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## DustyDog (Jul 12, 2016)

LeananSidhe said:


> This is mostly a question for the men here.
> 
> Would it bother you if your partner masturbated after sex? Let’s say you gave her an orgasm or two and then had intercourse and you were finished but she wanted more. Would you be offended? What if it was every night?
> 
> Edited to add.... I’m the woman. My husband is great in bed but my sex drive is so high right now that I’m constantly ready to go. 5 minutes after sex is over I start thinking about what we just did or what I want next time and suddenly I’m ready for more.


My current romantic partner is LD, but high need when she's 'up'. She lets me know that she wants more, and I happily give it. 

I don't speak locker-room or smoky bar, but I gotta think that an awful lot of guys would love the bragging rights of saying "thanks to me, my wife had four orgasms last Monday in about 30 minutes!". Tell him you want more, verbally guide his use of tongue and fingers and make him feel like the stud you need him to be.

I will never understand sexuality completely in either gender, but I DO understand that every human being is different. 35 years ago, I had a partner who could glide from one climax to the next with little break and she was rather loud. She said "baby you keep touching me like that and I can do this all night". Only when I used my fingers and voice. PIV sex? "It's not the same, but I love it", aka she did not orgasm during intercourse but it satisfied her in a different way. Current partner? If we're in the woods communing with nature (tent camping), she's more desirous of more than once. I can kind of tell because she gets the first one in a hurry. She needs my fingers inside when it happens to fully enjoy it, but this time, I only drew out a bit and resumed the massage and she said "baby some night we'll re-visit college and see how many times I can...omigod" and a few moments later, "Ok, keep going the second was better than the first" and not so long after, "OK, the third was kind of a let down, your turn". If there's any way to help your husband keep his mind open and be aware of how you're reacting and what you need - he should be able to enjoy all those extra Os right along with you.


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## Tony Conrad (Oct 7, 2013)

Incredible thread but very encouraging that wives can be so high drive. I'd enjoy it while you can as you don't know how you will feel at 60 or 70 yrs. My wife only O's once and I'm trained to think that's it. I never O until she has because as soon as I have I have zero interest. I can enjoy foreplay for an hour though.

If my wife was like that I'd get her to play with herself in the living room whilst I was on the computer or watched TV. She would be with me and I think I would enjoy the presence. After all your wife is your wife and we should all adjust to the one we are married to. I don't think you should be guilty about it. There are plenty of marriages that are sexless so rejoice in what you have but keep your self discipline for what needs to be done with the children and house and job if you work.


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## She'sStillGotIt (Jul 30, 2016)

uhtred said:


> Since I'm the high drive one in my relationship, I have trouble imagining getting sick of a horny partner - but of course it can happen and does happen to men.


It sure does. I've seen it *multiple* times over the years.

Men think they've hit the jackpot when they get a nympho girlfriend or wife but that thrill wears off after awhile. I still remember my brother dreading going home after work because he was tired and just wanted to relax and watch TV that night, but his wife was so highly sexed she needed it all the time. It was no longer the thrill for him it had been for the first couple of years and he just didn't want it all the time anymore.

OP, that will likely happen with your husband after awhile. Get some toys and take care of yourself so you're not humping the poor guy's leg all the time.


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## MZMEE (Apr 17, 2018)

Well I would think it's better that you masturbate than seek out sex from an actual person. Everybody's sex drive is different and your husband needs to know if he can't keep up, you have to do SOMETHING to accommodate your need. I mean it's harder for a man to have sex back to back to back because of how the penis works. Us women can have an orgasm and be ready to do it again just because of how our sex organs are made. If you sex drive is THAT high, he really needs to understand and be grateful that you are just handling it yourself and not seeking it out in someone else.

Does he have issues with it? Maybe make him understand it's not a deficiency in his performance, it's really just the level of your sex drive.


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## cdbaker (Nov 5, 2010)

For me, if my wife felt the need to masturbate after EVERY session, yeah I'd start to doubt that she was getting off with me, or even enjoying her activity with me. We guys like to act tough, but I think a lot of us are pretty sensitive when it comes to our abilities in bed and satisfying our wives. Assuming that she really did enjoy the sex with me and just wants to get off again after, I don't really mind it a bit because it turns me on enormously to watch her as well. With that said, here are my tips for the wife in this scenario:

1. Number one, keep making it clear to him that you enjoyed the sex, and are just so horny still that you want to get off again.
2. Perhaps try to involve him! Reach over, take his hand and put it on your breast, ask him to speak dirty to you, talk dirty to him, scratch your finger nails across his chest while you are cumming, etc. Just try to involve him if you can.
3. Cuddle up to him real close when you're finished, as if you just had an intensely erotic and intimate experience with him, because you have.


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## greg28 (Jun 26, 2018)

LeananSidhe said:


> This is mostly a question for the men here.
> 
> Would it bother you if your partner masturbated after sex? Let’s say you gave her an orgasm or two and then had intercourse and you were finished but she wanted more. Would you be offended? What if it was every night?
> 
> Edited to add.... I’m the woman. My husband is great in bed but my sex drive is so high right now that I’m constantly ready to go. 5 minutes after sex is over I start thinking about what we just did or what I want next time and suddenly I’m ready for more.


My wife was the same way when she was younger. Constantly rubbing one out and intense orgasms all the time. Sometimes up to 10 times a day. All good as long as everyones being pleased though. Tapered off over the years it seemed like. As long as your not giving to anyone else and he’s getting his then wear it out it’s good for you!


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## BioFury (Jul 9, 2015)

She'sStillGotIt said:


> I still remember my brother dreading going home after work because he was tired and just wanted to relax and watch TV that night, but his wife was so highly sexed she needed it all the time.


Lol, can't say I'm sympathetic. As far as "problems" go, that's a pretty decent one to have >


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## LeananSidhe (Feb 6, 2018)

MZMEE said:


> Well I would think it's better that you masturbate than seek out sex from an actual person. Everybody's sex drive is different and your husband needs to know if he can't keep up, you have to do SOMETHING to accommodate your need. I mean it's harder for a man to have sex back to back to back because of how the penis works. Us women can have an orgasm and be ready to do it again just because of how our sex organs are made. If you sex drive is THAT high, he really needs to understand and be grateful that you are just handling it yourself and not seeking it out in someone else.
> 
> Does he have issues with it? Maybe make him understand it's not a deficiency in his performance, it's really just the level of your sex drive.


He has no issues with it currently.... I just worry that if it continues he’ll become insecure.

He’s very helpful! He normally does it for me but sometimes I’ll sneak off and do it myself if I know he’s extra tired. 
But he’s great. I told him that Thursday night I didn’t sleep well because I kept having dirty dreams and waking up to masturbate so last night I woke up to him rubbing me. He gave me a couple orgasms and then turned around and went back to sleep. Haha. He’s a keeper.


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## LeananSidhe (Feb 6, 2018)

She'sStillGotIt said:


> It sure does. I've seen it *multiple* times over the years.
> 
> Men think they've hit the jackpot when they get a nympho girlfriend or wife but that thrill wears off after awhile. I still remember my brother dreading going home after work because he was tired and just wanted to relax and watch TV that night, but his wife was so highly sexed she needed it all the time. It was no longer the thrill for him it had been for the first couple of years and he just didn't want it all the time anymore.
> 
> OP, that will likely happen with your husband after awhile. Get some toys and take care of yourself so you're not humping the poor guy's leg all the time.


This is legitimately my biggest fear. We’ve been married for 15 years. I was high drive the first 6 (sex nearly every day), steady drive the next 3 (3-4 times a week), lower drive the next 4 (2 times a week), NO drive for 1 year (grudgingly 1 time a week), and now back to high drive the past year. The downs were all due to hormonal BC.
So far he’s enjoying it.


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## Ihearyah (Nov 1, 2012)

LeananSidhe said:


> This is mostly a question for the men here.
> 
> Would it bother you if your partner masturbated after sex? Let’s say you gave her an orgasm or two and then had intercourse and you were finished but she wanted more. Would you be offended? What if it was every night?
> 
> Edited to add.... I’m the woman. My husband is great in bed but my sex drive is so high right now that I’m constantly ready to go. 5 minutes after sex is over I start thinking about what we just did or what I want next time and suddenly I’m ready for more.


He sounds lame. He has fingers, a tongue, and there are toys so i guess i don't get why he is "finished" I think most men think their orgasm means the end of sex. I don't get that and never will. Even if i last 5 minutes i will gladly spend the next 4 hours getting my woman off every way possible and sometimes in the process i will resurrect again too and if i don't i don't care its hotter than hell getting her off repeatedly.


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## She'sStillGotIt (Jul 30, 2016)

Ihearyah, you do know this is a zombie thread and the OP hasn't been back since September?


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## bkyln309 (Feb 1, 2015)

Im that way. I can have a great sex session and have several Os and my partner then finishes. I may go for a couple more if my switch is still on! Im high drive so the more the better. My partner is great about satisfying me and watching me continue. He is not offended at all. He likes to watch.


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

Sometimes the zombies can walk again for quite a while.....

I have no problem with zombie threads if they are on general topics as opposed to someone's specific issue. 



She'sStillGotIt said:


> Ihearyah, you do know this is a zombie thread and the OP hasn't been back since September?


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## Anon Ten (Jan 11, 2019)

uhtred said:


> Sometimes the zombies can walk again for quite a while.....
> 
> I have no problem with zombie threads if they are on general topics as opposed to someone's specific issue.


Forums:

"Why did you start a new thread? Use the search feature, your question has been answered a million times."

"Why are you bringing up old topics? Start a new thread."


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## StevenH (Aug 1, 2019)

Not offensive at all if she wanted to do that. In fact, I'd like to help enhance it if possible. My bond with my wife is so great that I'd want her to even 'show me' how she likes it. Heck, I've even experienced a second and sometimes a third O myself during our 'after' play.


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## CraigBesuden (Jun 20, 2019)

It wouldn’t bother me in the slightest.

Normally I perform cunnilingus. Round after round of orgasms until my wife can’t take any more. So it’s not as issue.

Sometimes, though, it’s just intercourse and she’ll follow up with her vibrator.

Sometimes I’m taking too long with intercourse and can’t finish, due to condoms or anti-anxiety meds or whatever. So I’ll just stop, say it’s not going to happen, and I’ll finish myself off. She’s not offended.


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## bkyln309 (Feb 1, 2015)

This is pretty standard in my relationship. And it has nothing to do with not being satisfied or Oing with my boyfriend. Its just sometimes I just need that extra O.


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