# Is he worth the hassle?



## Marigold32 (Nov 24, 2013)

Hi all,
I have been married for two years into my 3rd marriage. I have two kids one from my first marriage and the other from this marriage. 
My husband works away most of the year. A month in the marriage I found out that he was planning for another woman to visit him where he was. I found the email and confronted and him and told I was leaving him. He begged me and swore on our holy book (we are religious) that he won't do it again and that I should give him another chance. He said was just lonely and the girl meant nothing. I called the girl from his Skype and confronted her wanting to hear her side and she said they'd just started talking and she never knew he was married. To my surprise she apologised and sympathised with me and promised never to get in touch with him again. We later made up but things have never been the same. Every time he is away I feel he is upto no good. The trust is gone. Lately we fell out big time and every time we fall out he wont call for weeks. I planned on temporarily moving to join him but he changed his mind about the move and said I should stay. I know he loves me but the trust is gone. 
Once I felt really down and randomly spoke to my ex who was in town and heard that I was having issues with my husband. He was just checking on me. I later had to tell my husband about it. He got annoyed and decided to put up a picture of another woman as his Skype profile picture for me to see and the rest of his friends on Skype. I rang to ask him why he did that but he didn't answer my calls. I had to file for a divorce at the religious court and was granted it within days. In my religion a woman can divorce herself. He was informed but it came as a shock to him. Two days later he called me begging and apologising saying that he only put up that photo to get at me for what I told him but didn't mean anything. He said I should re consider my decision and not let the divorce leap the three month period the religion allows after which the marriage is final. I'm just confused, I still love him but I'm not sure if this marriage is worth fighting for again. I have to give my final word when he calls. And I know it will be that I'm done for good. I have not been very lucky with husbands. Both my previously marriages ended as a result of them cheating. I might just be unlucky or just have a lousy choice of husbands. I only held on to this one cos another child is born. Should I continue to try? Any thoughts?


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## LoveMy2Boys (Apr 16, 2013)

I think you are right that you are not good with marriages. I feel so badly for your children. You need to get out of this marriage and don't remarry until your children are grown. They have been through enough heartache.


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## Fleur de Cactus (Apr 6, 2013)

DOnt stay with some one who punishes you with silent. He is supposed to be a good husband and father with open communication. I would divorce him. dont stay with some one who does not respect you.


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## Marigold32 (Nov 24, 2013)

Thank you guys. I'll take your advices on board.


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## Papa Bear85 (Dec 21, 2013)

Marriage is not your friend. Bail and live. Focus on the kids for now.comeback to relationships later.


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