# The Cheater's Friend site? It's closed!



## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

His explanation is an example of an epiphany. Apparently the last straw was a post that made him realise how coldly cruel some of the posters over there were.

I admire his candour.


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## JustSomeGuyWho (Dec 16, 2012)

MattMatt said:


> The doctor Is Out.
> His explanation is an example of an epiphany. Apparently the last straw was a post that made him realise how coldly cruel some of the posters over there were.
> 
> I admire his candour.


What site was that?


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## moxy (Apr 2, 2012)

I wonder what the content of that post was. How weird.


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## BjornFree (Aug 16, 2012)

JustSomeGuyWho said:


> What site was that?


d0cc00l.com


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

The Doctor is now Out. If you see what I mean.

A poster said she found the idea of a man crying as laughable. That was the last straw for him.


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## C-man (Oct 23, 2012)

Maybe we'll see a lot of new posters on this site. 

More of the WS perspective!


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## JustSomeGuyWho (Dec 16, 2012)

Man, I just read some of the conversations on that site. Repulsive. What the hell is wrong with people?


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

C-man said:


> Maybe we'll see a lot of new posters on this site.
> 
> More of the WS perspective!


Maybe? I think we have had a few come over already. I am SURE there are quite a few lurkers, at least. 

As for WS perspective... we want to hear the rationalizations?? :scratchhead:


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## JustSomeGuyWho (Dec 16, 2012)

Maricha75 said:


> Maybe? I think we have had a few come over already. I am SURE there are quite a few lurkers, at least.
> 
> As for WS perspective... we want to hear the rationalizations?? :scratchhead:


A lot of what I read ... many of them were completely unrepentant, couldn't have cared less what they were doing to their spouse and children and bristled at criticism. One thread I read talked about the thrill of having sex with their OM/OW while on the phone with their BS. Some of them seemed to feel guilty while doing it but continued to justify it. Some were just plain laughing at their BS. Some had been caught and had gone underground, continuing to laugh at their BS. I too would like to hear their thought process. It was really interesting (and cringe worthy) seeing people right in the middle of their affair ... whereas most here are dealing with the consequences.


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

JustSomeGuyWho said:


> A lot of what I read ... many of them were completely unrepentant, couldn't have cared less what they were doing to their spouse and children and bristled at criticism. One thread I read talked about the thrill of having sex with their OM/OW while on the phone with their BS. Some of them seemed to feel guilty while doing it but continued to justify it. Some were just plain laughing at their BS. Some had been caught and had gone underground, continuing to laugh at their BS. I too would like to hear their thought process. It was really interesting (and cringe worthy) seeing people right in the middle of their affair ... whereas most here are dealing with the consequences.


I'm aware. I have read some. I refrained from registering there because I wouldn't have followed the rules. I would have called them them on the BS and would have been banned.


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## Pandakiss (Oct 29, 2010)

Just looked and saw it was shut down. Read the reason why and all of the nearly 300 comments. I cannot believe the way they gaslight themselves. It's like they cant or won't remember what was written. 

The stuff he linked was bad. But I read worse in the happy hour section. It's been retitled but can't recall to what. It was not a positive place for help getting out of affairs, but indeed a place to get hugs for wrong doing. A place to get tips on avoiding getting caught. 

Y'all should have seen it a year ago. My husband and I lurked there and he said it made him feel murderous. Not towards me, but the sick fvcks who were posting. 

It's laughable to see now they want to erase their accounts. If I was doing that much dirt I wouldn't want it seeing the light of day either. Oh well. It's like now the safety is gone the real stuff comes out. 

There were one or two folks who had some sense but the rest....just awful. The BS bashing, the sex in the marital bed, while on the phone, car sex. That's just the tip of the ice burg. Suddenly it's forgotten and it's a great place, we (meaning they) can come to for real support. There is no other place for us. 

I am sad to see it go. It's one of the few places where you can see the true ugly side and know signs to look for. Funny it seems like it was just a huge experiment in the mind of cheaters. 

A final thought....mumbles guide to eating....is gold. Very sad it's in a place like that. Kudos to doc.


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## walkonmars (Aug 21, 2012)

Maricha75 said:


> Maybe? I think we have had a few come over already. I am SURE there are quite a few lurkers, at least.
> 
> As for WS perspective... we want to hear the rationalizations?? :scratchhead:


Most of them have gathered at the "other affair site" and are flaming the doc and bemoaning the "petty, uncouth bitterness" of the betrayed who posted on the U TURN thread.


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## Machiavelli (Feb 25, 2012)

walkonmars said:


> Most of them have gathered at the "other affair site" and are flaming the doc and bemoaning the "petty, uncouth bitterness" of the betrayed who posted on the U TURN thread.


I didn't go there much, but I thought it was pretty valuable for new BHs. I say BH cause it seemed like most of the people on there were women. What's the "other affair site"?


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

walkonmars said:


> Most of them have gathered at the "other affair site" and are flaming the doc and bemoaning the "petty, uncouth bitterness" of the betrayed who posted on the U TURN thread.


Yea... funny how one who was calling them on their nonsense was also a WS... funny how that works out. 

I didn't see anything "petty" and "uncouth" about any of the BS posting on that thread. I DID see some WS begging to have their accounts and posts deleted....and is that "other" site the one they mentioned in the thread on DC? It might be worth going and telling them off...even if I were to get banned there...

BTW, mars...you and Dig were awesome in that thread!


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## walkonmars (Aug 21, 2012)

Machiavelli said:


> I didn't go there much, but I thought it was pretty valuable for new BHs. I say BH cause it seemed like most of the people on there were women. What's the "other affair site"?


Private affairs

I had to LOL at the first thread I read. It concerned an OM who couldn't get it up IYKWIM. The degree of angst, empathy, tips, tricks etc was laughable and pathetic. If he doesn't take care of his little problem his affair partner is going to cheat on him!


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## walkonmars (Aug 21, 2012)

Maricha75 said:


> BTW, mars...you and Dig were awesome in that thread!


Hmmmm I seem to recall a few others......wonder who they could be.


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## Kasler (Jul 20, 2012)

Oh god I couldn't even read a whole thread. Came close to triggering.


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## JustSomeGuyWho (Dec 16, 2012)

Maricha75 said:


> I'm aware. I have read some. I refrained from registering there because I wouldn't have followed the rules. I would have called them them on the BS and would have been banned.


Just read some of the threads on the other site. OMG, I would get banned for sure for some of the things I want to say.


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## ing (Mar 26, 2011)

can someone please PM the "other sites" I use them for research purposes..


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## sandc (Dec 15, 2011)

Maricha75 said:


> Maybe? I think we have had a few come over already. I am SURE there are quite a few lurkers, at least.
> 
> As for WS perspective... we want to hear the rationalizations?? :scratchhead:


Yeah. They are already here.


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## sandc (Dec 15, 2011)

Just read the u-turn article. How cold he operate for so long and not really read the forums? I don't buy it. Wonder what the real story is? Civil suit?


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## warlock07 (Oct 28, 2011)

I think he might have had a close call /faced with infidelity in his own life..


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## Decorum (Sep 7, 2012)

This explains some of the posts Ive been seeing.
To deal in this kind of filth, misery, and destruction in such a un-ashamed way is akin to trafficing in things to evil to mention. Its despicable.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Some seriously heartless sh-t there... =/
I don't blame the administrator really, I would be very ashamed if I hosted a site for cheaters to gather and post such despicable crap.

"Some of these cheaters are truly cold and cruel and almost psychopathic in their discussions of their affairs and getting a sexual thrill out of seeing the affair partner in their wife’s clothing or getting an extra charge out of having sex in the marital bed."

I think this site could be useful actually. On our infidelity section there are many men and women refusing to MAN/WOMAN up in the face of such traversities and are just WAY too forgiving. Perhaps reading how their husbands/wives called them to have a chat while they are fking someone else AT THE SAME TIME would make them realise how heartless some people truly are.

And when faced with knowledge of the sheer heartlessness of cheaters perhaps they will learn that they are no longer dealing with the man/woman who they thought loved them.


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## Decorum (Sep 7, 2012)

I agree with you dude, I looked at it once and it was enligntening.
To read the ws thoughts in their own words is stark.

I would like to get a few examples of these to show to others.

All ws's are not the same, that was clear but even the guilt ridden ones were so in-human in their hearts.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Maricha75 said:


> Yea... funny how one who was calling them on their nonsense was also a WS... funny how that works out.
> 
> I didn't see anything "petty" and "uncouth" about any of the BS posting on that thread. I DID see some WS begging to have their accounts and posts deleted....and is that "other" site the one they mentioned in the thread on DC? It might be worth going and telling them off...even if I were to get banned there...
> 
> BTW, mars...you and Dig were awesome in that thread!


:iagree:


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

warlock07 said:


> I think he might have had a close call /faced with infidelity in his own life..


I think it dates back several months when Doc visited with us on this site last year.

I think he lurked here, saw the pain of the betrayed spouses, maybe recognised a scenario or two and thought: "Oh... that poor man/woman who is suffering so much, it looks like they might be the betrayed spouse of that poster on my site.

"Hmmm... maybe I really should take a closer look at some of the threads on my site."


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

sandc said:


> Just read the u-turn article. How cold he operate for so long and not really read the forums? I don't buy it. Wonder what the real story is? Civil suit?


I knew someone from another forum (nothing to do with marriage, it's a general IT and webmaster forum) who was operating 100 different websites.

I got the impression that Doc is probably similar and maybe dropped the ball.

I get press releases about infidelity websites delivered to my inbox at work several times a month. The one billed itself as being: "ideal for the married woman who wants a bit on the side."

Now, many journalists would run that story, thinking it nothing but a naughty, harmless, light story.

I, however, do not use them (unless re-purposed to prove a negative point) but then, I came to TAM because of having to cope with infidelity, so know the pain of infidelity.

From what I read in his explanation I that think he employed someone to help run the site who told him what a cesspit it was. Someone who had been cheated on, maybe a friend or family member?

Or how about this for a scenario? By chance someone he is close to has their WS on DC and Doc realised this?


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## Shadow_Nirvana (Jan 1, 2013)

Things written there... I don't know, it is always said here that under the right circumstances everybody will cheat. But will everybody be so fvcking cruel? I don't know, maybe. More than maybe, after reading the threads here and viewing my own life.

Reading about these stuff just makes me more of a misantrophe and a paranoid.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Shadow_Nirvana said:


> Things written there... I don't know, it is always said here that under the right circumstances everybody will cheat. But will everybody be so fvcking cruel? I don't know, maybe. More than maybe, after reading the threads here and viewing my own life.
> 
> Reading about these stuff just makes me more of a misantrophe and a paranoid.


A normal person who cheats... just cheats.

It takes a 'special' kind of weird person to seek out other cheaters to brag.


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

You know those hackers who claim to do things for social justice, they should go after the sites that support the cheaters and help bring some much deserved karma and truth into their lives.

I do think we have has a couple of posters from over there. At least one likes to refer to folks here as "bitter...." Which is telling. Bitter isn't how I would describe a victim of cheating. Hurt, scarred, angry, wounded, but not bitter. Bitter is a negative label and used to undermine the validity of the feelings felt by the person you a referring to. It calls them out for the way they feel, but blames them and their experience.

Bitter is the word a cheater uses to describe the BS that is no longer putting up with the WS lies and betrayal.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Shaggy said:


> You know those hackers who claim to do things for social justice, they should go after the sites that support the cheaters and help bring some much deserved karma and truth into their lives.
> 
> I do think we have has a couple of posters from over there. At least one likes to refer to folks here as "bitter...." Which is telling. Bitter isn't how I would describe a victim of cheating. Hurt, scarred, angry, wounded, but not bitter. Bitter is a negative label and used to undermine the validity of the feelings felt by the person you a referring to. It calls them out for the way they feel, but blames them and their experience.
> 
> Bitter is the word a cheater uses to describe the BS that is no longer putting up with the WS lies and betrayal.


:iagree:


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## SomedayDig (Jul 17, 2012)

I agree Shaggy...seems like a few now posting "warning" people about what cheaters do and look out for this and that.

Umm...no sh-t.

I was called bitter the other day by a "new" poster. I thought it was quite telling when I looked at her profile and found that she had cheated on her "uncaring" husband.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

SomedayDig said:


> I agree Shaggy...seems like a few now posting "warning" people about what cheaters do and look out for this and that.
> 
> Umm...no sh-t.
> 
> I was called bitter the other day by a "new" poster. I thought it was quite telling when I looked at her profile and found that she had cheated on her "uncaring" husband.


But, then again, what is wrong if someone does feel bitter towards a cheating dastard?

Hey! Cheaters! Maybe you deserve to have people feel bitterness toward your actions?


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

MattMatt said:


> But, then again, what is wrong if someone does feel bitter towards a cheating dastard?
> 
> Hey! Cheaters! Maybe you deserve to have people feel bitterness toward your actions?


I think bitter is the wrong word. Bitter is a negative word describing the feeling of blaming others without cause for your failure. It's like disgruntled.

BS don't get bitter, they get angry, they get wise, they get wary, they get distrustful, they get hyper vigilant, they get aware of lies, they get intolerant of lies, half truths and misdirection, and of liars

They get educated and aware.

But I don't think they get bitter.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Shaggy said:


> I think bitter is the wrong word. Bitter is a negative word describing the feeling of blaming others without cause for your failure. It's like disgruntled.
> 
> BS don't get bitter, they get angry, they get wise, they get wary, they get distrustful, they get hyper vigilant, they get aware of lies, they get intolerant of lies, half truths and misdirection, and of liars
> 
> ...


Shaggy, I am not sure if I didn't feel somewhat bitter when my wife had her affair. There was a good deal of rugsweeping and maybe that caused me to feel bitterness and was part of the root of my idiotic revenge affair?


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

MattMatt said:


> Shaggy, I am not sure if I didn't feel somewhat bitter when my wife had her affair. There was a good deal of rugsweeping and maybe that caused me to feel bitterness and was part of the root of my idiotic revenge affair?


Matt, from what I've learn of your story, you were angry, shocked, shaken, revolted, disappointed, and even a little vengeful.

Bitter not so much

But hey, if you want bitter who am I ?


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## sandc (Dec 15, 2011)

MattMatt said:


> I knew someone from another forum (nothing to do with marriage, it's a general IT and webmaster forum) who was operating 100 different websites.
> 
> I got the impression that Doc is probably similar and maybe dropped the ball.
> 
> ...


Poetic justice would be that he found his wife was posting on the site.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

Guys I told you long ago that good over comes evil.
I remember telling a poster not to get so upset over that site. It was wrong and this site was ment for good....we will prevail.

Seriously there was alot of bad going on there, what did you all expect? The world is not that bad, its just some of us got dealt a bad hand. 

Now what do we do with those bad cards!

BTW I welcome all those waywards, some of us just might make a difference in the choices they make.


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## The Cro-Magnon (Sep 30, 2012)

Machiavelli said:


> I didn't go there much, but I thought it was pretty valuable for new BHs. I say BH cause it seemed like most of the people on there were women.


Telling, that.


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## Hortensia (Feb 1, 2013)

There's still ****** ******* com and married but lonely...the doc may be out but cheating friendly sites would always exist..
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Shaggy said:


> Matt, from what I've learn of your story, you were angry, shocked, shaken, revolted, disappointed, and even a little vengeful.
> 
> Bitter not so much
> 
> But hey, if you want bitter who am I ?


Vengeful? Yeah, maybe that. But that built up, over time.

What did upset me was that when I was unable to perform sexually as well as I'd done before her affair, my wife would get angry with me. Like it was my fault.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Hortensia said:


> There's still ****** ******* com and married but lonely...the doc may be out but cheating friendly sites would always exist..
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Duh.... do you think that site is where the expression having your ashes hauled comes from? :scratchhead::rofl:


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## Hortensia (Feb 1, 2013)

Lol
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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