# Dating???



## Gabriel527 (Jun 9, 2011)

This is going to sound awful... I have posted on here before that STBXH left in May. Has a girlfriend and flaunts it to friends, but not his family or our mutual friends. I recently took up dating someone two weeks ago. I have to attend an event at my old school and all those mutual friends and even my in-laws will be there. New guy wants to come for moral support, but I am afraid I will look like a horrible person showing up with a guy almost 7 months separated, but at the same time want that support. What do I do??


----------



## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

I personally would not/could not do it. Your in laws will be there! Don't mke more drama than necessary. The guy u are dating should understand.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## PartlyCloudy (Jun 6, 2011)

I gotta agree w/JB on this one, especially since you've only been dating two weeks. That's way too soon & would create some major awkwardness. Also, if I popped up w/a new bf around those people when H isn't even bringing his gf around them yet, I personally would be worried it would validate or excuse, in their minds, my H's actions. BTW, girl, my heart goes out to you for what he did.


----------



## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

I wouldn't bring a guy I'd only been dating for 2 weeks to a function like that, for many reasons.

The only moral support you need is your own, and trusted friends and family. This moral support sounds more like it could be translated from his point of view as 'foot in the door', due to the type of function. In fact, I'd see his desire to go as a red flag, rather than a medallion befitting a knight in shining armor. The proposed scenario gives me an ewwwwww feeling. It almost sounds as though he has no sense of respect for your private life at this point. 2 weeks and he knows all about why you need moral support, etc. Boyfriends are for dating, after you are divorced...and therapists are for learning how to get appropriate moral support from known, trusted, tried and true friends, preferably those who have no interest in getting into your panties.

I predict trouble with this guy. In fact, I would tell him I needed a little space, and was going on my own, and would also need some time to decompress afterwards, say a couple days to chill, and see how he reacts. This is a legit maneuver with which to separate the creepy control freaks from the honest ones. Someone who would want to come along to this kind of function after only dating 2 weeks, and would not even suggest that maybe you should chin up and go on your own, sounds like a sort of control freak to me. Damsels in distress are easy pickings. Don't be one.


----------



## CLucas976 (Jun 27, 2010)

If he's not flaunting it, neither should you.

I know it's hard. My stbx has been all over every 17-18yr old drunken kid he can find to rub something into my face. (im not sure what, exactly) because I am the one who left him.

Meanwhile, I've gone out for drinks with one guy since february, and aside from the immediate people in my home, and the two people I asked about the guy No one knows about it, including stbx. 

Like everyone said, there is NO need to create more drama than necessary. Let the new man be a companion, but let your mutual friends and in-laws see you as a strong independent person that you are. Even if the boyfriend want's to be waiting for you when you get home.


----------



## Set me FREE (Sep 5, 2011)

homemaker_numero_uno said:


> * in fact, i'd see his desire to go as a red flag, rather than a medallion befitting a knight in shining armor. The proposed scenario gives me an ewwwwww feeling.* it almost sounds as though he has no sense of respect for your private life at this point. 2 weeks and he knows all about why you need moral support, etc. Boyfriends are for dating, after you are divorced...and therapists are for learning how to get appropriate moral support from known, trusted, tried and true friends, preferably those who have no interest in getting into your panties.
> 
> I predict trouble with this guy. In fact, i would tell him i needed a little space, and was going on my own, and would also need some time to decompress afterwards, say a couple days to chill, and see how he reacts. This is a legit maneuver with which to separate the creepy control freaks from the honest ones. Someone who would want to come along to this kind of function after only dating 2 weeks, and would not even suggest that maybe you should chin up and go on your own, sounds like a sort of control freak to me. *damsels in distress are easy pickings. Don't be one.*



this.


----------



## aston (Oct 24, 2011)

better off going by yourself.......safer and more control / peace of mind that way.


----------

