# F U D G E!!!!! Can't f-ing go any longer without sex



## Looking2Change (Jul 24, 2016)

I'm at my breaking point and ready to explode. Can't take being sexless any longer. Not sure what the hell to do. I have needs and I'm losing my self control. Been almost 4 months with no sex and I don't know how to handle this any longer.


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## Personal (Jan 16, 2014)

...


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## Relationship Teacher (Jan 3, 2016)

Looking2Change said:


> I'm at my breaking point and ready to explode. Can't take being sexless any longer. Not sure what the hell to do. I have needs and I'm losing my self control. Been almost 4 months with no sex and I don't know how to handle this any longer.


Is there anything that excuses her from having to have sex with you? If so, please list those things.


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## Starstarfish (Apr 19, 2012)

That she's been chronically ill and apparently her doctor can't stop her from getting recurrent yeast infections.


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

Go to a bar.


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## Herschel (Mar 27, 2016)

What exactly is it you are looking to change? Change your name to Lookingtovent, because you is all talk and no action.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

Fudge? Really? :rofl:


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

I suggest that you file for divorce.

That way you can go look for a new girlfriend.

And your wife can take the time she needs to heal and improve her health.


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

WorkingOnMe said:


> Fudge? Really? :rofl:


Believe it or not, a big part of sexuality is the ability and desire to sooth each other. When this fails, women typically go for fudge and other forms of chocolate as an alternate means of getting their satisfaction!

So for any man living in a sexless marriage eager to please his wife, DO NOT and I repeat DO NOT give her chocolate. Simply empathize with her lack of chocolates. Nothing more and nothing less.

Cheers, 
Badsanta


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## GuyInColorado (Dec 26, 2015)

Go to Nevada and bring $600. It's legal and you can experience a few different girls.


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

GuyInColorado said:


> Go to Nevada and bring $600. It's legal and you can experience a few different girls.


Do they have lunch specials, or happy hour pricing?


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## Malaise (Aug 8, 2012)

Looking2Change said:


> I'm at my breaking point and ready to explode. Can't take being sexless any longer. Not sure what the hell to do. I have needs and I'm losing my self control. Been almost 4 months with no sex and I don't know how to handle this any longer.


4 months?

Amateur.


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## switcher (Sep 19, 2016)

Get one of those "real dolls".

You can barely tell the difference except they don't talk back which is a plus.


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

Malaise said:


> 4 months?
> 
> Amateur.


Agree. He needs to come back in 4 YEARS.


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## switcher (Sep 19, 2016)

blueinbr said:


> Agree. He needs to come back in 4 YEARS.


That's how long it's been for you, eh.


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

switcher said:


> That's how long it's been for you, eh.


I wish.


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## switcher (Sep 19, 2016)

damn


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## Looking2Change (Jul 24, 2016)

blueinbr said:


> Agree. He needs to come back in 4 YEARS.


I won't go 4 years without. I've got another month or so tops and I'm going to get it elsewhere.


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## Holdingontoit (Mar 7, 2012)

Looking2Change said:


> I won't go 4 years without. I've got another month or so tops and I'm going to get it elsewhere.


Don't cheat. Divorce first. Better all around.

And remember, if you are looking to change, stop trying to change her. Change the one you can control. You. Perfectly OK to say to your spouse "I intend to remain faithful to my spouse, but I also intend to have sex with my spouse consistently. If you do not intend to have sex with me consistently, then I no longer intend to remain married to you."


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

badsanta said:


> Believe it or not, a big part of sexuality is the ability and desire to sooth each other. When this fails, women typically go for fudge and other forms of chocolate as an alternate means of getting their satisfaction!
> 
> So for any man living in a sexless marriage eager to please his wife, DO NOT and I repeat DO NOT give her chocolate. Simply empathize with her lack of chocolates. Nothing more and nothing less.
> 
> ...


This is as wrong as wrong can get!!!!!

1. Chocolate is a reason unto itself. Not an alternative.

2. A man takes his life in his hands when bring home a bit of chocolate is something he avoids. Just ask my husband.

3. Empathize as you grovel and grab the car keys!!!!!!


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

Anon Pink said:


> This is as wrong as wrong can get!!!!!
> 
> 1. Chocolate is a reason unto itself. Not an alternative.
> 
> ...


*OMG You could not even type straight while thinking about this!*

I stand by what I said! I think by the fact that you got upset was because the idea of not getting any chocolate makes you vulnerable. With vulnerability first comes anger, but if you get through it, you'll discover a newfound sense of closeness by turning to your husband instead of chocolates.

It is OK, calm down!!!! I really like chocolates too, but there are none in my house at the moment. The closest thing is a suspicious bottle of mostly empty chocolate syrup next to the salad dressing that may be a few years old!


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## josephddiazz (Sep 20, 2016)

You should maybe try dating, looking for someone that you feel comfortable with .. and let things happen if you want them to.


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## Livvie (Jan 20, 2014)

josephddiazz said:


> You should maybe try dating, looking for someone that you feel comfortable with .. and let things happen if you want them to.


You know you just advised a married man, with a child and a wife who is recovering from Lyme disease, on a marriage site, to date and cheat, right????


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## LucasJackson (May 26, 2016)

Looking2Change said:


> I'm at my breaking point and ready to explode. Can't take being sexless any longer. Not sure what the hell to do. I have needs and I'm losing my self control. Been almost 4 months with no sex and I don't know how to handle this any longer.


"Handle" the situation yourself. Hell, I went through the first 16 years of my life taking care of myself. We all did. You'll be fine.


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## JamesTKirk (Sep 8, 2015)

badsanta said:


> Believe it or not, a big part of sexuality is the ability and desire to sooth each other. When this fails, women typically go for fudge and other forms of chocolate as an alternate means of getting their satisfaction!
> 
> So for any man living in a sexless marriage eager to please his wife, DO NOT and I repeat DO NOT give her chocolate. Simply empathize with her lack of chocolates. Nothing more and nothing less.
> 
> ...


I never thought of this. I'm going to go through the house when she's out tonight and get rid of (or hide very well) all chocolate. Maybe I'll replace it with liquor bottles  (jk. Just a joke but she IS easy when buzzed)


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

LucasJackson said:


> "Handle" the situation yourself. Hell, I went through the first 16 years of my life taking care of myself. We all did. You'll be fine.


When did you start to "handle" the situation? In the crib? :scratchhead:


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

blueinbr said:


> Go to a bar.


This Friday or Saturday night. Stay til 1 pm.


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

JamesTKirk said:


> I never thought of this. I'm going to go through the house when she's out tonight and get rid of (or hide very well) all chocolate. Maybe I'll replace it with liquor bottles  (jk. Just a joke but she IS easy when buzzed)


My wife straight up told me one day that she felt she was needing something and almost came to me for affection. Instead she found chocolates first and that comforted her enough that she no longer wanted/desired my affection. 

She should have never admitted that as I now pay close attention to any chocolates in the house. Instead of hiding them, I'll point them out to the kids and they eat em up! My favorite move is to buy her favorite chocolates (small bag of Dove chocolate covered almonds), and give them to her right after dinner when the kids are asking for desert (for which there is none). Then my wife is so happy with these, but unable to resist the urge to share 95% of them with the kids as they gobble them up. My wife will only get like three chocolate covered almonds, of which I'll ask her for one of hers myself! 

Sorry @Anon Pink, I know to you this is like reading the gory details of a gruesome crime scene. But I do what I need to do, even if it is a very cold and calculated at times!



















Badsanta


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## LucasJackson (May 26, 2016)

blueinbr said:


> When did you start to "handle" the situation? In the crib? :scratchhead:


Yes, probably in the womb. If you haven't noticed, we men love to play with Mr. Happy. He's our best buddy. He's always there for us no matter what.


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## thenub (Oct 3, 2014)

LucasJackson said:


> Yes, probably in the womb. If you haven't noticed, we men love to play with Mr. Happy. He's our best buddy. He's always there for us no matter what.




He's an upstanding guy even though he lives with a couple of nuts. 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

@badsanta !!!!!!!!


Look what you did!

This poor man is about to have his balls handed to him and it's going to be YOUR fault!





JamesTKirk said:


> I never thought of this. *I'm going to go through the house when she's out tonight and get rid of (or hide very well) all chocolate.* Maybe I'll replace it with liquor bottles  (jk. Just a joke but she IS easy when buzzed)



Don't do it James, don't do it!!!


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

Anon Pink said:


> @badsanta !!!!!!!!
> 
> 
> Look what you did!
> ...


 @JamesTKirk YOU SEE THIS????










That is right, hidden right behind the access panel for the jacuzzi pump is a dark (chocolate) secret that women have been using for years to help them withhold sex in their marriages in order to gain all the power and become the "gatekeeper!" 

Take away ALL the chocolates and you will get a glimpse of what you marriage looks like when the playing field has been evened. As @Anon Pink warns you, it could get ugly if she throws a temper tantrum while loosing her self control. 

BE STRONG! 

DO IT!!!!!!!

Badsanta


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## tropicalbeachiwish (Jun 1, 2016)

thenub said:


> He's an upstanding guy even though he lives with a couple of nuts.
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


Lol. Nice play on words

Sent from my SM-G930V using Tapatalk


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

badsanta said:


> @JamesTKirk YOU SEE THIS????
> 
> 
> 
> ...



As much as I LOVE a dominant man, I'd have to safe word on this. Hard limit! Touch my stash and it will be a cold day in hell before you touch me again. YMMV


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## lisamaree (Nov 2, 2014)

You could spare your wife any further torment and divorce her. 4 mos without sex because she has a serious illness is nothing. There are people who go years who have a perfectly healthy and capable spouse.


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## bluezone (Jan 7, 2012)

OP...You said your wife has lyme disease and also recurrent yeast infections. Not very conducive for her to desire sex, but 4 months is a long time. Does she make any effort to do anything for you sexually so that you guys have some kind of intimacy? 

Because she has been on heavy duty antibiotics for lyme, it is very likely that she has candida, or excess yeast. Has she looked into treating herself for candida, or getting tested for it?


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## Looking2Change (Jul 24, 2016)

bluezone said:


> OP...You said your wife has lyme disease and also recurrent yeast infections. Not very conducive for her to desire sex, but 4 months is a long time. Does she make any effort to do anything for you sexually so that you guys have some kind of intimacy?
> 
> Because she has been on heavy duty antibiotics for lyme, it is very likely that she has candida, or excess yeast. Has she looked into treating herself for candida, or getting tested for it?


She is being treated for excessive yeast. She's been on it now for several weeks but we still haven't had sex. Who knows if it's working or not. She was saying tonight that her treatment could last a year or longer. I explained to her that I can't go that long and that she needs to start using her mouth and that I have needs etc. She started to laugh it off and I explained to her that I wasn't joking and I wasn't going another 2 days without so we'll see what happens.

This sucks.


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## Malaise (Aug 8, 2012)

Such empathy and compassion.


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## Blondilocks (Jul 4, 2013)

Unsweetened cranberry juice, live culture yogurt and no sugar will help with the yeast infections. No sugar means no chocolate, unfortunately.


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

Looking2Change said:


> She is being treated for excessive yeast. She's been on it now for several weeks but we still haven't had sex. Who knows if it's working or not. She was saying tonight that her treatment could last a year or longer. I explained to her that I can't go that long and that she needs to start using her mouth and that I have needs etc. She started to laugh it off and I explained to her that I wasn't joking and I wasn't going another 2 days without so we'll see what happens.
> 
> 
> 
> This sucks.




False threats will weaken you every time.


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## Livvie (Jan 20, 2014)

Looking2Change said:


> bluezone said:
> 
> 
> > OP...You said your wife has lyme disease and also recurrent yeast infections. Not very conducive for her to desire sex, but 4 months is a long time. Does she make any effort to do anything for you sexually so that you guys have some kind of intimacy?
> ...


You say explained to her you aren't going another two days without sex... how does that work, what exactly do you mean? Do you mean you will either force her if she doesn't willingly comply, or that you will cheat with someone else?


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## Affaircare (Jan 11, 2010)

Oops this thread got to three pages!

Time to start another thread about how neglected you are, how you can't live without sex, ask for the magic formula to MAKE HER have sex with you, threaten that you'll leave if she doesn't have sex right now...



...and THEN mention that your wife has Lyme disease!


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## MrsHolland (Jun 18, 2016)

I must be an outlier, can go for years without chocolate. Are ppl suggesting that women prefer sex to chocolate?


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## anonmd (Oct 23, 2014)

I thought it was they'd put out when they didn't want to to get chocolate.


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## Looking2Change (Jul 24, 2016)

I'm going to try to work things out as best as I can. The next 2 weeks will be the most stressful of my life so right now just focused on getting my business moved and into the new location and figuring out how to pay for all the overages.

I've been trying to communicate with my wife during this process but still don't feel she is giving any support. However, right now it's the least of my worries.

Once the business is moved and open I will go back to trying to fix our relationship. I'm willing to try until the end of this year so another 3 months. If improvement doesn't happen and things don't change then I'm moving out in January. This isn't the direction I want to go but the way things have been these past 2 years are not how I'm willing to live the rest of my life.

As I said in previous posts we haven't gone on a date in 2 years and haven't done ANYTHING. There is way more to this than her not having sex or not wearing makeup etc. She now understand how important it is to have a relationship that we actually bond and do things and she understands if that doesn't change then I have no choice to leave.

Wish me luck and hopefully things will improve.


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

Don't you get sick of waffles?


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## Talker67 (Apr 7, 2016)

Starstarfish said:


> That she's been chronically ill and apparently her doctor can't stop her from getting recurrent yeast infections.


so? wear a condom


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## Livvie (Jan 20, 2014)

Talker67 said:


> Starstarfish said:
> 
> 
> > That she's been chronically ill and apparently her doctor can't stop her from getting recurrent yeast infections.
> ...


Uhhhhhhh.....a yeast infection makes the vagina raw and irritated. Condom or no condom, irrelevant to that.


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## KaraBoo0723 (Oct 1, 2016)

lisamaree said:


> You could spare your wife any further torment and divorce her. 4 mos without sex because she has a serious illness is nothing. There are people who go years who have a perfectly healthy and capable spouse.




Yep. I have a super high sex drive, my preference would be 3 x day. My husband withheld sex for over a year because of a comment made in anger -- and failed to explain why he would not make love to me. 4 months due to illness?! Man up and deal with it or divorce her and prove how little you understand about true intimacy. 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## StikkyEbi (Oct 5, 2016)

badsanta said:


> *OMG You could not even type straight while thinking about this!*
> 
> I stand by what I said! I think by the fact that you got upset was because the idea of not getting any chocolate makes you vulnerable. With vulnerability first comes anger, but if you get through it, you'll discover a newfound sense of closeness by turning to your husband instead of chocolates.
> 
> It is OK, calm down!!!! I really like chocolates too, but there are none in my house at the moment. The closest thing is a suspicious bottle of mostly empty chocolate syrup next to the salad dressing that may be a few years old!


Seriously? The last thing a sexless marraige needs is a "lack of chocolate" because what this really implies to me is that the husband isn't supposed to show his wife he loves her through gifts every now and again. It doesn't matter if it's chocolate or something else she enjoys. Showing love and gratitude can bring a couple closer and make the wife more likely to at least consider giving a BJ or HJ if she can't physically have sex with the man.

For some background on the subject, I have sex with my husbands usually daily if not more than once a day and never less than once a week. With the only reason I wouldn't be pertaining to being on my period or having severe cramps, which sometimes happen randomly. Even on my period I'm not against sex he is and I give BJs normally cause I still get sexually frustrated and find that pleasuring him helps me feel less sexually frustrated. Now, you might be thinking oh this woman has a very high sex drive, but that isn't usually the case. My husband just treats me well and makes sure I enjoy the sex and feel good about pleasuring him. He surprises me with flowers, chocolates, ice cream or other things i enjoy regularly. He takes care of me when I'm sick or on my period. Plus in case you think he's a white night or something he's not, he dislikes modern day feminism and believes in what he sees as true equality instead. The point in this background of course is to show that there aren't really any special factors making our relationship easy. However, if my husband stopped showing me he loved me through actions as much as words it would only make things way more difficult.


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## JamesTKirk (Sep 8, 2015)

StikkyEbi said:


> Seriously? The last thing a sexless marraige needs is a "lack of chocolate" because what this really implies to me is that the husband isn't supposed to show his wife he loves her through gifts every now and again. It doesn't matter if it's chocolate or something else she enjoys. Showing love and gratitude can bring a couple closer and make the wife more likely to at least consider giving a BJ or HJ if she can't physically have sex with the man.
> 
> For some background on the subject, I have sex with my husbands usually daily if not more than once a day and never less than once a week. With the only reason I wouldn't be pertaining to being on my period or having severe cramps, which sometimes happen randomly. Even on my period I'm not against sex he is and I give BJs normally cause I still get sexually frustrated and find that pleasuring him helps me feel less sexually frustrated. Now, you might be thinking oh this woman has a very high sex drive, but that isn't usually the case. My husband just treats me well and makes sure I enjoy the sex and feel good about pleasuring him. He surprises me with flowers, chocolates, ice cream or other things i enjoy regularly. He takes care of me when I'm sick or on my period. Plus in case you think he's a white night or something he's not, he dislikes modern day feminism and believes in what he sees as true equality instead. The point in this background of course is to show that there aren't really any special factors making our relationship easy. However, if my husband stopped showing me he loved me through actions as much as words it would only make things way more difficult.


Here I go reviving a dead thread, but respectfully your situation doesn't apply here. If you have sex up to multiple times a day and give even while on periods, you're a giving and passionate wife. Your husband appreciates you because you appreciate him and show it with passion and desire. I'd shower my wife with choclate and gifts if she did all of what you described.


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