# Need opinions please.



## sansan (Dec 15, 2015)

I have been on here previously. I finally left last January and the divorce was finalized in June. We remained in touch by text, and I would visit the pets some Saturday mornings. He has gone through periods where he doesn't want to talk to me or see me. He wanted to stop all communication in August, in his head we were dating again? I clarified at that time we were only friends . So communication stopped until I wanted an item from the house, it was my daughter's. He said I could pick it up if I brought wine and we could have dinner together. I told him I couldn't do that, so he got upset and refused for me to go over., then finally said he could mail it. I finally recvd the package, thanked him by text and now he wants me to go over ... if I can cut our dog's hair. This is something I used to do, but his behavior has been so hit and miss. I miss seeing the dogs, so I want to go but I feel like I am getting warning signs that are going off.


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## Jane139 (Jan 6, 2015)

Sounds very strange...if you go, take someone with you. It may anger him but keep you safe.


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## NoMoreTears4me (Oct 21, 2015)

I don't think its a good idea to go. You need to set boundaries and keep them. I guarantee his is misreading signals and thinks you are distant but willing to Reconcile. 

Or he may be trying to show you he has changed etc. If you are not interested then you need to not only set boundaries for yourself but for his sanity as well.

I know when I was in limbo trying to figure out whether my ex was reconciling or not it was maddenng.


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## sansan (Dec 15, 2015)

Thanks for the replies. He actually solved my problem. I tried to change the date for later this week when someone could come with me. He agreed at first, then came back later and said he forgot about something he already had planned and said I could come another day when I could have dinner, alone with him. I just stopped the conversation there and said we needed to just go back to how it was with no communication. Nomoretears, it has also been maddening for me., I had always been under the impression that when I would go over to visit the dogs that it was just being cordial, friendly. I agree that leaving it be, is better for both of us.


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## Corpuswife (Apr 24, 2009)

He obviously wants alone time with you.

What do you want? Do you wish for something different to happen?

He doesn't appear stable and waiting for someone to "get it" may take forever.


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