# sex vs love making



## g62wolf (Oct 5, 2021)

reading posts about no sex in marriage, sex as chore, i wonder. why we call it sex to start with? would love making be better term? And if it is love making, where is love if we withhold such important part of relation, one which makes us bond together, one where 2 become one, from our significant one?


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

You have sex to start with. Making love comes later.


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## Young at Heart (Jan 6, 2015)

g62wolf said:


> reading posts about no sex in marriage, sex as chore, i wonder. why we call it sex to start with? would love making be better term? And if it is love making, where is love if we withhold such important part of relation, one which makes us bond together, one where 2 become one, from our significant one?


I agree. I am like to make love to my wife. I like the emotional connection and bonding that is created by the oxytocine and cuddling after sexual intercourse. That doesn't mean that I don't also enjoy a good "f#cking" where I am so arroused by my wife that my inner animal instincts are released and I ravish her body. 

I have found that I refer to making love and my wife asks me if I want to have sex. I think it is one of perspective. To me I want intimacy and that means I want not just an orgasm, but an emotional bonding experience.


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## Mr.Married (Feb 21, 2018)

A good relationship has both..... and each partner knows the difference 😍


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

To me it's all about making love. I have never had any interest in having sex with a man I barely know. Sex when you are in love and committed is very special.


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## Cici1990 (Feb 22, 2021)

I’m not a huge fan of the term “making love.” I’ve used it but it makes me feel a bit sick.


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## BigDaddyNY (May 19, 2021)

g62wolf said:


> reading posts about no sex in marriage, sex as chore, i wonder. why we call it sex to start with? would love making be better term? And if it is love making, where is love if we withhold such important part of relation, one which makes us bond together, one where 2 become one, from our significant one?


Call it what you will, at the end of the day it is all sex. 

I do get your point though. It sounds more reasonable to say no to sex with your spouse rather than saying no to making love with your spouse.


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## Anastasia6 (May 28, 2017)

It also ignores one of the common problems that we see.

It frequently isn't making love. Often times when asked about the encounter it is some starfish sex or the poster can't tell if the other has had an orgasm and doesn't care. Love is an act of giving and connecting. Frequently we hear this making love from the perspective if a wife 'loved' their husband she'd have sex even if she didn't want to. Making love would involve both parties giving and recieving pleasure. Often times it's a discussion about the man needing a release? that sounds a lot like a physical act that isn't necessarily tied to emotion.

I think if two sane people who are in love make love then you'd see that happen more often and you'd see less sexless threads but we all know resentment builds for a reason. Mostly on both sides it is because of a lack of love. Which can lead to a lack of sex.

And sex is only one small way to show your love for someone.


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## UpsideDownWorld11 (Feb 14, 2018)

Cici1990 said:


> I’m not a huge fan of the term “making love.” I’ve used it but it makes me feel a bit sick.


haha. Feels icky.

I don't know. Sex is sex whether with your spouse or some rando. Feels good either way. The only difference is I don't have to wear a condom with my wife, which in that context rando sex kinda sucks.


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## Snaredrum (May 24, 2020)

Words mean different things to different people. We prefer the word intimacy when it comes to our physical and emotional connection.


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## DLC (Sep 19, 2021)

Banging, F-ing, doing it, get it on, naked wrestling, there are many names to it.

I don’t know. None really bother me. It’s who you are doing that with. You can have the desire to “make love”, but if the other side is a “dead fish”, then that turns into banging or whatever.

and variety makes it fun. Oh wait what do I know, I am in a sexless marriage. LOL


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

Cici1990 said:


> I’m not a huge fan of the term “making love.” I’ve used it but it makes me feel a bit sick.


It’s a decent Yngwie J Malmsteen song title. Catchy chorus on that one.

I agree though I don’t use that term with my wife.

Edit: Wow I forgot how the song went. All the diminished arpeggios in the solo section don’t really work with the song, sad.


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## romantic_dreamer (Jun 15, 2021)

For me sex and love making are the same. I need deep emotional connection to enjoy sex. I can't understand how men can have sex with no emotions at all.


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## Personal (Jan 16, 2014)

g62wolf said:


> reading posts about no sex in marriage, sex as chore, i wonder. why we call it sex to start with? would love making be better term? And if it is love making, where is love if we withhold such important part of relation, one which makes us bond together, one where 2 become one, from our significant one?


If I want to turn my wife off sexually and have her cringe at me, while she is thinking there is something wrong with me, I will start calling it "love making".

That said since I have so far enjoyed sharing a wonderfully rich sex life with great frequency, through a quarter of a century with my wife. I will keep calling it sex and ****ing, to help avoid ****ing it up.

Plus since your seem to be playing with the idea, that someone could be convinced to share sexual intercourse with their partner by calling it "making love". You would do well to understand that a person can love another person, without wanting to share sex with them. While it is also true that one doesn't need to love someone to want to share sex with them either. So given that, I hope you realise, you're meandering up the wrong garden path.


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## Casual Observer (Sep 13, 2012)

I don’t think it’s so important what you’re doing when. But rather that the two of you are on the same page.


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

Sex = drum solo, played in various ways

Love making = saxophone 80s style


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

heartsbeating said:


> Love making = saxophone 90s style


Careless Whisper?


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## Personal (Jan 16, 2014)

heartsbeating said:


> saxophone 90s style


??????

C'mon the sax was dead by the 90s, on the other hand if you meant 80s .


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

I had already changed it to 80s style


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

ccpowerslave said:


> Careless Whisper?


And that was when I realized, 'Wait, that was in the 80s' and yes thought of Careless Whisper.

Get out of my head, you two!


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## Acacia Avenue (Oct 21, 2021)

ccpowerslave said:


> It’s a decent Yngwie J Malmsteen song title. Catchy chorus on that one.
> 
> I agree though I don’t use that term with my wife.
> 
> Edit: Wow I forgot how the song went. All the diminished arpeggios in the solo section don’t really work with the song, sad.


 YJM

I did not expect to see this here.


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## In Absentia (Aug 21, 2012)

Andy1001 said:


> You have sex to start with. Making love comes later.


Other way round for me...


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## MarmiteC (Jun 28, 2021)

Now having experienced a healthier sexual relationship I prefer the word intimate. Yes, you can be intimate without sex, but the intimacy is what creates the bond.


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## Rus47 (Apr 1, 2021)

Cici1990 said:


> I’m not a huge fan of the term “making love.” I’ve used it but it makes me feel a bit sick.


?!? Why does it make you *sick*? My wife and I have always referred to our intimacy, our connection, the consummation of our bond as "making love". Even the first time in the back seat of my car as teenagers. We have neither referred to it as 'sex'. I guess neither of us have ever had "sex" with anyone. Our intimacy includes sex, sex is part of it, and the animal intensity of mating is an aspect but it includes much more of an emotional bonding. Maybe it is a generational thing. But it makes you sick??!!??


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

In Absentia said:


> Other way round for me...


I tell my wife (jokingly) I’m going to **** you tonight and make love to you in the morning.


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## Hiner112 (Nov 17, 2019)

In my mind the dichotomy is between "making love" and Fing with sex just being the general term for any sexual activity.

Making love would be more characterized by eye contact, kissing, and more sensual. You might use words.

Fing is forceful, vigorous, and sweaty. Probably only grunts or exclamations.

Each has their time and place and any long term relationship would be lacking if either was absent.


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

Acacia Avenue said:


> YJM
> 
> I did not expect to see this here.


Number 22!

I have a fairly good memory when it comes to songs. Since this forum often deals with matters of the heart often it stirs up memories of songs or song lyrics.


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## Personal (Jan 16, 2014)

Rus47 said:


> But it makes you sick??!!??


My wife and I aren't fans of the term either, to the point we find it a bit repellant and neither of us can recall ever saying "make love" to describe sexual intercourse except to make fun of the term 'cause yuck. To us the term is really cringey, we just prefer to be matter of fact in the words we use, so it's always been "sex" as shorthand for sexual intercourse), or we say "****" or "****ing". And just because we say sex etc, that certainly doesn't mean there is no bonding, intimacy or love between us.


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

Personal said:


> To us the term is really cringey…


This. It also doesn’t describe what we’re usually doing which is getting off.

To use an old term, it’s “corny”. It’s like comping a jazz song without any cool substitutions… corny!


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## Personal (Jan 16, 2014)

Hiner112 said:


> Making love would be more characterized by eye contact, kissing, and more sensual. You might use words.
> 
> Fing is forceful, vigorous, and sweaty. Probably only grunts or exclamations.


When my wife and I share sex, we will do any combination or all of that and more, yet it's still just ****ing or sex to us.


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## Cici1990 (Feb 22, 2021)

Rus47 said:


> ?!? Why does it make you *sick*? My wife and I have always referred to our intimacy, our connection, the consummation of our bond as "making love". Even the first time in the back seat of my car as teenagers. We have neither referred to it as 'sex'. I guess neither of us have ever had "sex" with anyone. Our intimacy includes sex, sex is part of it, and the animal intensity of mating is an aspect but it includes much more of an emotional bonding. Maybe it is a generational thing. But it makes you sick??!!??


Yeah, it makes me feel queasy to say it under most circumstances. I do know a term that’s worse: baby dancing 🤮


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## MarmiteC (Jun 28, 2021)

Cici1990 said:


> I do know a term that’s worse: baby dancing 🤮


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## Livvie (Jan 20, 2014)

Personal said:


> My wife and I aren't fans of the term either, to the point we find it a bit repellant and neither of us can recall ever saying "make love" to describe sexual intercourse except to make fun of the term 'cause yuck. To us the term is really cringey, we just prefer to be matter of fact in the words we use, so it's always been "sex" as shorthand for sexual intercourse), or we say "****" or "****ing". And just because we say sex etc, that certainly doesn't mean there is no bonding, intimacy or love between us.


Same. I've never had sex outside a love/ relationship but I find the term creepy and cringey as well. It's just semantics and possibly generational. 

What's the saying, something like: a rose by another name is still a rose? 🌹


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## LisaDiane (Jul 22, 2019)

What is funny is that I was watching an old movie from the 1930s, and the women were calling a couple walking together and sharing a quick kiss "making love"...which I guess makes more sense, because it signifies the actions we engage in that create love!


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## Gomezaddams51 (Jun 15, 2020)

g62wolf said:


> reading posts about no sex in marriage, sex as chore, i wonder. why we call it sex to start with? would love making be better term? And if it is love making, where is love if we withhold such important part of relation, one which makes us bond together, one where 2 become one, from our significant one?


To me there is sex and then there is making love.
Sex is when the guy comes up kisses the woman and then lifts her skirt or dress and drops her undies and they go to it. He kisses her when done and goes and walks away. Kind of the whamm bamm kind of thing.
Making love is when they kiss and hug and hold and slowly undress and go through the whole slow process of touching, sucking and kissing from head to foot and then they have sex and finally finish and lay there and hug.


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## Cici1990 (Feb 22, 2021)

Gomezaddams51 said:


> To me there is sex and then there is making love.
> Sex is when the guy comes up kisses the woman and then lifts her skirt or dress and drops her undies and they go to it. He kisses her when done and goes and walks away. Kind of the whamm bamm kind of thing.
> Making love is when they kiss and hug and hold and slowly undress and go through the whole slow process of touching, sucking and kissing from head to foot and then they have sex and finally finish and lay there and hug.


Yeah that whole making love definitely sounds gross to me. Sounds like something in a romance novel.


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## Rus47 (Apr 1, 2021)

Cici1990 said:


> Yeah that whole making love definitely sounds gross to me. Sounds like something in a romance novel.


Yeah, all of us old folks are just gross. So we use language that grosses out the kids. Our apologies.


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## joannacroc (Dec 17, 2014)

In my admittedly limited experience, people who say "making love" instead of "sex" are kind of boring in bed.


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

All this talk made me remember to charge the vibrator for some “love making” later. Nothing says I love you like max setting.


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## Cici1990 (Feb 22, 2021)

Rus47 said:


> Yeah, all of us old folks are just gross. So we use language that grosses out the kids. Our apologies.


Not just the language but the idea of slowly undressing each other, kissing, sucking, being all mushy and cuddly afterwards. That’s just not for me.


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## Cici1990 (Feb 22, 2021)

ccpowerslave said:


> All this talk made me remember to charge the vibrator for some “love making” later. Nothing says I love you like max setting.


My husband told me he bought us some new goodies today. I think I have ever kind of vibrator under the sun so I don’t think it’ll include one of those. I think when the box comes I’m going to ask him to make love to me (if I can stomach saying it with a straight face) and see what his reaction is.


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

Cici1990 said:


> My husband told me he bought us some new goodies today. I think I have ever kind of vibrator under the sun so I don’t think it’ll include one of those. I think when the box comes I’m going to ask him to make love to me (if I can stomach saying it with a straight face) and see what his reaction is.


If my wife said that I would ask her if by that she meant anal and if so I can grab the silicon lube. Somehow I don’t think the joke would register though… 🤔


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## Rus47 (Apr 1, 2021)

joannacroc said:


> In my admittedly limited experience, people who say "making love" instead of "sex" are kind of boring in bed.


For sure lol


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## Rus47 (Apr 1, 2021)

Cici1990 said:


> Not just the language but the idea of slowly undressing each other, kissing, sucking, being all mushy and cuddly afterwards. *That’s just not for me.*


For sure lol


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## BenWylder (Aug 2, 2021)

g62wolf said:


> reading posts about no sex in marriage, sex as chore, i wonder. why we call it sex to start with? would love making be better term? And if it is love making, where is love if we withhold such important part of relation, one which makes us bond together, one where 2 become one, from our significant one?


If you're with someone you love in my opinion it's all making love whether it's emotional and sensual in bed or trash talking on the bathroom floor. It's just depends on the mood you both are in at the moment.


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## Livvie (Jan 20, 2014)

BenWylder said:


> If you're with someone you love in my opinion it's all making love whether it's emotional and sensual in bed or trash talking on the bathroom floor. It's just depends on the mood you both are in at the moment.


It isn't if that's a phrase you hate and never use..


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## Defhero (Jan 5, 2022)

Doesn't the saying go, I make love to my wife and have sex with my mistress?


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## Julie's Husband (Jan 3, 2022)

romantic_dreamer said:


> For me sex and love making are the same. I need deep emotional connection to enjoy sex. I can't understand how men can have sex with no emotions at all.


I had the reverse problem. I couldn't understand that women would just jump into bed with a total stranger. It really blew my mind. When the women approach with no emotion, I can't recipricate with emotion. It's all about plumbing for these women, I guess.


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## Julie's Husband (Jan 3, 2022)

Why does "making love" sound icky? To me, making love involves an emotional investment. Is that investment scary to some folks, maybe? Dunno.

I have never ended up making love with my sex partners. No emotion involved, just sexual tension and release. On the other hand, I made love to my wife before we got on to more frivolous things like romps and sex play.


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## Mr.Married (Feb 21, 2018)

Nothing says I Love You quite like “I’m gonna bust dat ass tonight”. Aahhhhhhh … such romance sweeps her off her feet.


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## Rus47 (Apr 1, 2021)

Mr.Married said:


> Nothing says I Love You quite like “I’m gonna bust dat ass tonight”. Aahhhhhhh … such romance sweeps her off her feet.


If I had EVER said something like that to MY wife, she would have been pIst beyond belief, and justifiably so. There would have been no 'ass busting' for a long while. 

Maybe just a cultural thing, or upbringing, as this OLD thread summarizes, lot of people ( maybe the majority ) despise the term lovemaking. I was raised in an earlier time.


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## Bulfrog1987 (Oct 8, 2021)

I long for the day where I’m made love to. It’s been so scarce in my life that I couldn’t even answer this question.


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## thunderchad (12 mo ago)

My wife hates the term love making. She says it sounds lame and boring.

She prefers **** or ****ing.


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## Julie's Husband (Jan 3, 2022)

thunderchad said:


> My wife hates the term love making. She says it sounds lame and boring.
> 
> She prefers **** or ****ing.


I had a couple of partners like that and another that just wanted to count how many orgasms I had. I like hot and heavy emotion with serious cuddling.


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## Brian from Columbus (Dec 9, 2020)

Bulfrog1987 said:


> I long for the day where I’m made love to. It’s been so scarce in my life that I couldn’t even answer this question.


my dear you deserve true lovemaking! Lovemaking should be a three day process…. Foreplay and teasing for 48 hours, touches, hints, teasing, notes, hot thoughts, denial of release as passion builds to a crescendo. The day of lovemaking: more teasing. By the time we indulge, we are wet aroused quivering bundles of flesh. Our wants become needs. we are without inhibitions, every fantasy and fetish and turn on is fair game. I tell you my ultimate turn ons, and you tell me yours. Hours of slow lovemaking, multiple climaxes, rest, repeat, try new things. Our bodies reek of sweaty sex and of each other. Give and take, take turns in charge, all in love! Love makes it worthwhile, yet our intimacy is intense and wild


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

Rus47 said:


> If I had EVER said something like that to MY wife, she would have been pIst beyond belief, and justifiably so. There would have been no 'ass busting' for a long while.
> 
> Maybe just a cultural thing, or upbringing, as this OLD thread summarizes, lot of people ( maybe the majority ) despise the term lovemaking. I was raised in an earlier time.


Really? If you said something like that now and then to your W you think she'd freak out?

That's very limiting thinking. Is it more her or more you that (can't 😮🙄) be direct now and then?
.


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## Bulfrog1987 (Oct 8, 2021)

Brian from Columbus said:


> my dear you deserve true lovemaking! Lovemaking should be a three day process…. Foreplay and teasing for 48 hours, touches, hints, teasing, notes, hot thoughts, denial of release as passion builds to a crescendo. The day of lovemaking: more teasing. By the time we indulge, we are wet aroused quivering bundles of flesh. Our wants become needs. we are without inhibitions, every fantasy and fetish and turn on is fair game. I tell you my ultimate turn ons, and you tell me yours. Hours of slow lovemaking, multiple climaxes, rest, repeat, try new things. Our bodies reek of sweaty sex and of each other. Give and take, take turns in charge, all in love! Love makes it worthwhile, yet our intimacy is intense and wild


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## Rus47 (Apr 1, 2021)

Ragnar Ragnasson said:


> Really? If you said something like that now and then to your W you think she'd freak out?
> 
> That's very limiting thinking. Is it more her or more you that (can't 😮🙄) be direct now and then?
> .


Seriously it not in our nature to talk that way to one another. We were raised long ago


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## Julie's Husband (Jan 3, 2022)

I just recently learned to talk dirty. The first time she had a look of shock then a girlish giggle. Her eyes will go wide with pleasure now. Still some words I won't use, some my wife does not appreciate. But not in bed.


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## Bulfrog1987 (Oct 8, 2021)

Julie's Husband said:


> I just recently learned to talk dirty. The first time she had a look of shock then a girlish giggle. Her eyes will go wife with pleasure now. Still some words I won't use, some my wife does not appreciate. But not in bed.


👏🏻 Clap 👏🏻 clap 👏🏻


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## Brian from Columbus (Dec 9, 2020)

Bulfrog1987 said:


>


don’t swoon my dear! You’ll miss the best part, the “aftermath” of lovemaking!

love, attraction, trust are key ingredients. Then spice and creativity and naughtiness are added so your world is rocked.

and….my revelations give you information that levels the playing field erotically. There are NO secrets, NO rules, NO inhibitions when we are alone! No idea that matters to you is too unusual, and our honest sharing of fantasies intensifies our pleasure and bond. Uh huh!


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

Rus47 said:


> Seriously it not in our nature to talk that way to one another. We were raised long ago


I get you me too. W and I have learned humor and fun injected in sexual relations is a stress reducer. There's no down side. 
You know we're older, too, and M long time.

Just a thought. We used to not be more open a long time ago.


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## Rus47 (Apr 1, 2021)

Ragnar Ragnasson said:


> I get you me too. W and I have learned humor and fun injected in sexual relations is a stress reducer. There's no down side.
> You know we're older, too, and M long time.
> 
> Just a thought. We used to not be more open a long time ago.


Oh we are *VERY* open with one another and always have been. And tease one another a lot talking about sex past present and future. It isn't in either of our natures to say something like the quote. 

We have never even used the f word to one another, though realize that is just normal verbiage. If accidently let an F bomb loose in wife's hearing, she will tell me quickly that she doesn't appreciate that kind of language. And I will apologize for the slip. My Dad was a combat Marine, so you can imagine his language could get pretty salty. But *NEVER* around any female anywhere. And he insisted the same level of respect from me.


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## Bulfrog1987 (Oct 8, 2021)

Brian from Columbus said:


> don’t swoon my dear! You’ll miss the best part, the “aftermath” of lovemaking!
> 
> love, attraction, trust are key ingredients. Then spice and creativity and naughtiness are added so your world is rocked.
> 
> and….my revelations give you information that levels the playing field erotically. There are NO secrets, NO rules, NO inhibitions when we are alone! No idea that matters to you is too unusual, and our honest sharing of fantasies intensifies our pleasure and bond. Uh huh!


That swoon is definitely before the love making. If I’m fact I find someone to reach such a level.


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## Brian from Columbus (Dec 9, 2020)

Bulfrog1987 said:


> That swoon is definitely before the love making. If I’m fact I find someone to reach such a level.


you shall find such a lover, I have no doubt! You’re charming, intelligent, expressive, and open minded

my ex girlfriend liberated me sexually.  She was more experienced and adventurous than I was. She asked me during playful teasing (I cannot hold back the truth when I’m that excited) to confess my fantasies to her. She told me EVERY hot idea she had….

I told her the usual macho male things, I love to kiss and *__ and ____*. She suspected I was holding back, “Tell me everything baby” she coaxed. “would you like me in charge sometimes? Do you like my pretty bare feet? are you ticklish and would you hold still as I find out for myself? Are you phobic about your own taste and fluids, or can you promise me you’ll be at my service even after we make love? I’m an exhibitionist, wild it upset you if you saw me showing off?

once I admitted I was very ticklish and loved everything about her bare feet……she used those nuggets of truth to get the rest of my secrets confessed rather easily. End result: our intimacy was off the chart hot.


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## Bulfrog1987 (Oct 8, 2021)

Brian from Columbus said:


> you shall find such a lover, I have no doubt! You’re charming, intelligent, expressive, and open minded
> 
> my ex girlfriend liberated me sexually. She was more experienced and adventurous than I was. She asked me during playful teasing (I cannot hold back the truth when I’m that excited) to confess my fantasies to her. She told me EVERY hot idea she had….
> 
> ...


Haha am I though? We shall see. I am currently talking to someone, he seems legit, but he’s so far away.


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## Brian from Columbus (Dec 9, 2020)

Bulfrog1987 said:


> Haha am I though? We shall see. I am currently talking to someone, he seems legit, but he’s so far away.


well he would be a fortunate man to get to know you! I appreciate our friendship and banter. We’re in this together, so maybe what helps you, helps me…..


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

Funny that many people do not know where the F term came from. It is terminology that come from prostitution. So if someone says they want to F....it is saying they want to be treated like a hooker. Just used as a means to an end. The term is abbreviation meaning....For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge meaning the person was arrested for prostitution related offense. F.U.C.K. was the abbv LEO would write to shorten it


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

Divinely Favored said:


> Funny that many people do not know where the F term came from. It is terminology that come from prostitution. So if someone says they want to F....it is saying they want to be treated like a hooker. Just used as a means to an end. The term is abbreviation meaning....For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge meaning the person was arrested for prostitution related offense. F.U.C.K. was the abbv LEO would write to shorten it


And here I thought it was French. 🤣🤣🤣🤣


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

Numb26 said:


> And here I thought it was French. 🤣🤣🤣🤣


Nah, that's le fook.
🤣🤣🤣


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

Where I came from the F word was the same as saying "s**t," just a cuss word.


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

DownByTheRiver said:


> Where I came from the F word was the same as saying "s**t," just a cuss word.


The "F" word is my favorite cuss word and I use it many different ways! 🤣🤣🤣

BTW the term "making love" makes me cringe


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

Numb26 said:


> The "F" word is my favorite cuss word and I use it many different ways! 🤣🤣🤣
> 
> BTW the term "making love" makes me cringe


I named a dog Loretta once just so I could say, "F me, Loretta," which was some old saying I used to hear once in awhile.


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

I strongly prefer "do it."


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

I see a difference in the activity. To me making love is more slow, sensuous, grinding while making out. Usually starts with me giving wife a full body massage with Avacado oil from neck to toes. 

Sex is

Get on that bed and get your ass in the air! It is definitely not slow and sensuous. It is more me taking her and her riding the waves of orgasms until I tire out and leave her a panting collapsed heap trying to get her bearings with a smile like a Cheshire cat and glassy eyed like a woman stoned out of her mind. 

People talk about release...um ..not. She has WAY more release than I ever thought about. Her pleasure/release is 10:1 compared to mine. 30% of the time I do not even reach climax, makes me no difference. Nice if it happens, but I'll take the journey any day over the ending. I very much enjoy just giving my wife so much extasy.
I even get so much satisfaction just giving her pleasure from the full body massages I give her.


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## Sfort (Sep 28, 2019)

I've always heard that sex is nasty...if it's done right.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

DownByTheRiver said:


> Where I came from the F word was the same as saying "s**t," just a cuss word.


Pretty much among the guys a


Ragnar Ragnasson said:


> Nah, that's le fook.
> 🤣🤣🤣


Compliments of ye old cartoon character Pepe' le pue.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Edited to add, maybe from Werewolves of London, too. 🙄🤣🤣


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

Ragnar Ragnasson said:


> Pretty much among the guys a
> 
> Compliments of ye old cartoon character Pepe' le pue.
> 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
> ...


I love it! Pepe Le Pew. 🤣🤣


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

Bulfrog1987 said:


> Haha am I though? We shall see. I am currently talking to someone, he seems legit, but he’s so far away.


Your hat an American Hat Co. Bangora? Looks like it. I have to get a new one, but the American Hat Co. is few and far in between because of cost.


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## Bulfrog1987 (Oct 8, 2021)

Divinely Favored said:


> Your hat an American Hat Co. Bangora? Looks like it. I have to get a new one, but the American Hat Co. is few and far in between because of cost.


No, it’s actually just a cheap boot barn hat we bought years ago for my youngest stepson. He passed away 6 years ago. I wore it out a few months ago to a concert in his memory. That was his feather and all. I don’t know what American hat co is lol.


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## frenchpaddy (May 31, 2021)

In Ireland the f word can fit into every sentence, it can be a good thing it can be a bad thing ,it has so much entered the langue it is a cuss word and a very light cuss word 


DownByTheRiver said:


> Where I came from the F word was the same as saying "s**t," just a cuss word.


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## Jimi007 (6 mo ago)

I read this here before but don't understand the term What is Starfish Sex ?


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## frenchpaddy (May 31, 2021)

sex and love making for some are the same thing for some are very different things ,
it is a bit like the song called Some girls will some girls wont 




Some People didn’t take themselves so seriously! They just wanted to have fun. But for others they are not out just having fun

And people thinking they are on the same page ,when they are not .
one thinks they are having fun and others think they are planning out their next 10/ 20 years


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

Bulfrog1987 said:


> No, it’s actually just a cheap boot barn hat we bought years ago for my youngest stepson. He passed away 6 years ago. I wore it out a few months ago to a concert in his memory. That was his feather and all. I don’t know what American hat co is lol.


They are made in Bowie,Tx. and run around 4x the usual straw hat price. Low, wide crown. Had a co worker, whose son and groomsmen had them as part of his wedding outfit. She searched from Sherman , Tx to Texarkana,Tx and McAlester, Ok down to Tyler, Tx and found them only at Crazy House Western Wear in Reno, Tx.

She searched an area 200 miles by 200 miles and one store had them.


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

Jimi007 said:


> I read this here before but don't understand the term What is Starfish Sex ?


When she just lays there like a starfish, waiting for you to finish so she can leave


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

frenchpaddy said:


> In Ireland the f word can fit into every sentence, it can be a good thing it can be a bad thing ,it has so much entered the langue it is a cuss word and a very light cuss word


That's pretty much how it was where I came from and used in every possible context.


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## BigDaddyNY (May 19, 2021)

Divinely Favored said:


> Funny that many people do not know where the F term came from. It is terminology that come from prostitution. So if someone says they want to F....it is saying they want to be treated like a hooker. Just used as a means to an end. The term is abbreviation meaning....For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge meaning the person was arrested for prostitution related offense. F.U.C.K. was the abbv LEO would write to shorten it


Pretty sure that one is urban legend, lol. 

I thought the origin was from some old English or maybe German word meaning to strike or to move back and forth.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

BigDaddyNY said:


> Pretty sure that one is urban legend, lol.
> 
> I thought the origin was from some old English or maybe German word meaning to strike or to move back and forth.


Or in and out? 🤣🤣🤣🤣


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## Bulfrog1987 (Oct 8, 2021)

Divinely Favored said:


> Your hat an American Hat Co. Bangora? Looks like it. I have to get a new one, but the American Hat Co. is few and far in between because of cost.


Ummmm okay, so after reading your last post about groomsmen wearing these ect, lol.. I had to go look. It is in fact a Bangora. I had no idea and still know nothing about hats except I like em' and this one is special because it was his.


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

Bulfrog1987 said:


> Ummmm okay, so after reading your last post about groomsmen wearing these ect, lol.. I had to go look. It is in fact a Bangora. I had no idea and still know nothing about hats except I like em' and this one is special because it was his.


Had to get a new straw yesterday, my AHC Bangora had seen better days a few years ago, now it will be kept for a work hat only. Place I went, no longer had what I wanted, but found this Bangora for 1/3 the price of the other.


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## Longtime Hubby (7 mo ago)

Sometimes, couples make love. Sometimes, they simply need to f-u-c-k hard. (wife agrees)


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## DudeInProgress (Jun 10, 2019)

romantic_dreamer said:


> For me sex and love making are the same. I need deep emotional connection to enjoy sex. I can't understand how men can have sex with no emotions at all.


Are you saying that because you think you’re supposed to or that it makes you somehow more enlightened and less toxicity masculine? 
Or are you actually not wired the same as most men?

Because we are wired to desire and enjoy sex regardless of deep emotional connection. That doesn’t make it right or wrong, it just is. What we do with that is our choice.

So if you’re can’t enjoy sex without some deep emotional connection, you’re pretty far outside the mainstream of men (and even many women). 
Just saying.


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## Julie's Husband (Jan 3, 2022)

DudeInProgress said:


> So if you’re can’t enjoy sex without some deep emotional connection, you’re pretty far outside the mainstream of men (and even many women).
> Just saying.


That is a popular notion. How valid it is might be up for question. I am outside the stereotypical mainstream and do need romantic connection. I need a connection and sharing.

I think that following the popular stereotype of what is masculine is detrimental to men. For instance, I have multiple orgasms and I suspect that there may be more men than we now know of who are capable of multiple orgasms, but they have failed to realize they are due to constant mainstream indoctrination that they are not.

Then, men try to be self sufficient, stoic, providers and protectors and turn away help that they need, again feeling they are failures if they don't comply with the mainstream notion. I see many prostate cancer patients suffering needlessly because of this attitude.


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## Julie's Husband (Jan 3, 2022)

Longtime Hubby said:


> Sometimes, couples make love. Sometimes, they simply need to f-u-c-k hard. (wife agrees)


True. I need a loving, sharing sexual relationship, but break it up from time to time with a "romp". I still have Polaroid photos of one day my wife to be and I had a romp at her apartment. 😃


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## Mr.Married (Feb 21, 2018)

Divinely Favored said:


> Had to get a new straw yesterday, my AHC Bangora had seen better days a few years ago, now it will be kept for a work hat only. Place I went, no longer had what I wanted, but found this Bangora for 1/3 the price of the other.
> View attachment 89625


I believe I have that exact same pair of cowboy boots 👍


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

Mr.Married said:


> I believe I have that exact same pair of cowboy boots 👍


Yeah? Those black Ariats have seen better days. Hat them for years, now my work boots to weed eat and weld in.


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## BootsAndJeans (4 mo ago)

There is a distinct difference between just sex and making love. 

There have been times, especially when the kids were not grown, when we just had a small window of opportunity and just had hot, fast, passionate monkey sex. 

The majority of time, we make love. This usually includes the hot part, but encompasses a deeper connection and actions. For my part, hers too, we tell each other "I love you" and other stuff while in the acts. There is nothing more personal than looking her in the eyes, nibbling on her lips and telling her how much I love her as we build to the mutual release.


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