# How do you ladies like your physical affection?



## TX-SC (Aug 25, 2015)

I'm not talking about sex here, just physical affection. What makes you feel warm all over? A hug from the back? Spooning in bed? Snuggling under a blanket in front of the TV/fire? What makes you feel really loved and appreciated? 

Men can answer this too. 

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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

All of the above. 

Holding hands is another one. We always hold hands when we go out.


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## Keke24 (Sep 2, 2016)

All of the above.

Add: Kisses on the forehead; when he holds my hand while he's driving; putting me to sit in his lap, soft kisses on the back of my neck and lower back; when he wakes up and pulls my body into his and nuzzles his face in the back of my neck; gently running his fingers through my hair/scalp; big, long hugs, especially when he holds me up and I can wrap my legs around him. Mmmm all so satisfying.


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

Bare skin being rubbed when in bed. On my back, arm, leg, whatever. I just love the sensation in and of itself. It bugs me when I am watching TV for some reason though.

A kiss on the back of my neck whenever.

Spontaneously asking me to do something I love together, like a hike, a road trip, go see a football game.


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## prunus (Oct 29, 2016)

It's pretty bad that I don't even know how to answer this question. I mean I know how to, but I don't have any answers. I haven't been loved in so long (despite the fact that I was married) that I don't even know what would make me feel the most loved. I have a long road ahead of me.


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## TX-SC (Aug 25, 2015)

prunus said:


> It's pretty bad that I don't even know how to answer this question. I mean I know how to, but I don't have any answers. I haven't been loved in so long (despite the fact that I was married) that I don't even know what would make me feel the most loved. I have a long road ahead of me.


That's so sad to read. I'm sorry you have such a bad past in that regard! I too get very little of that since my wife scored very low on physical affection as a Love Language. It was my number 1. But, she's going to get it from me regardless!  

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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

Not necessarily in this order:
Cuddling/Snuggling
Kissing 
Petting and touching casually when passing by each other
Massage
"Nose nuzzles" (aka Eskimo kisses)
Eye contact (some people get so used to each other they don't really look at each other anymore)
Hugs
Hand holding/hand squeezes


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## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

I'm a very tactile person. I delight in the feel of nice fabrics, fur, anything with an interesting texture. That love of touch carries over into my relationships. I _love_ long hugs, soft kisses on my forehead or neck, snuggles in bed, hand holding, a hand on my back when introducing me to people or walking through a crowd, massaging my head, running fingers through my hair, running his hands up and down my arms to warm me up. I love pretty much any physical touch that conveys care for me. My SO seems to enjoy most of the same things, and initiates just as much non-sexual physical affection in our relationship as I do. Sometimes he'll come lay his head in my lap while we're watching tv just so I can lightly rub his forehead and scalp. He finds it deeply relaxing.


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## jb02157 (Apr 16, 2014)

prunus said:


> It's pretty bad that I don't even know how to answer this question. I mean I know how to, but I don't have any answers. I haven't been loved in so long (despite the fact that I was married) that I don't even know what would make me feel the most loved. I have a long road ahead of me.


I know how you feel, I only know what it's like to be lied to. Mine will be a long road to.


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

jb02157 said:


> I know how you feel, I only know what it's like to be lied to. Mine will be a long road to.


My whole family background is one of cheating, lies, deception etc. Its possible to love again and trust again, its happened to me. Its takes time though, but its worth it.


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## lucy999 (Sep 28, 2014)

A good, long meaningful bear hug, stroke on the cheek, forehead kisses, and a good smack on the ass.


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## Angeline (Aug 25, 2016)

I love when he gently moves my hair away from my face when we're talking, when he runs his finger-tips along my collar-bone, then his hands down my arms..Mmmmm, chills.: )
When I'm giving him oral, he carefully pulls all my hair back for me and will hold it in a "pony-tail" secured just by his hands.
His bear hugs are amazing- I could stay there forever..I get a combo of self-conciousness and warmth when he pulls back to look carefully at me and into my eyes, like he is really taking me in. 
When he walks up behind me, moves my hair over my shoulder and gives me warm, lingering kisses on my neck, below my ear and down my neck. (That actually makes me weak in the knees!)

One common theme I notice among the women here is that we mostly seem to love caring, gentle gestures. They don't scream "I need sex now!" They just gently remind us that we are special to our men and that is a serious aphrodisiac in and of itself! : )


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## *Deidre* (Feb 7, 2016)

My fiance likes to rub my legs, when we're watching tv, etc. I ilke holding hands in the car and when we walk through the mall or through the parking lot into a restaurant, for example. I come up behind him and hug him, and he does the same. He also will pick me up and carry me to the couch, or bedroom, in an affectionate/loving way. He also is a GREAT listener, and that means a lot to me, sometimes more than mere touching. I like that he cares about what I'm saying, and that seems to be another way that he shows me affection.


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## FeministInPink (Sep 13, 2012)

TX-SC said:


> I'm not talking about sex here, just physical affection. What makes you feel warm all over? A hug from the back? Spooning in bed? Snuggling under a blanket in front of the TV/fire? What makes you feel really loved and appreciated?
> 
> Men can answer this too.


All of this.



Keke24 said:


> Add: Kisses on the forehead; when he holds my hand while he's driving; putting me to sit in his lap, soft kisses on the back of my neck and lower back; when he wakes up and pulls my body into his and nuzzles his face in the back of my neck; gently running his fingers through my hair/scalp; big, long hugs, especially when he holds me up and I can wrap my legs around him. Mmmm all so satisfying.


All of this, too.

I love holding hands, no matter what we're doing. 
I like it when he hugs be from behind while I'm cooking.
I like playing footsie--he teases me, but he likes it, too.


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## release2016 (Dec 30, 2016)

gently caressing my earlobes feels good


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## Hellomynameis (Dec 16, 2016)

prunus said:


> It's pretty bad that I don't even know how to answer this question. I mean I know how to, but I don't have any answers. I haven't been loved in so long (despite the fact that I was married) that I don't even know what would make me feel the most loved. I have a long road ahead of me.


Same here. My STBXH never showed physical affection, even in the bedroom. I've never really had a chance to discover my likes and dislikes in this regard. It was fortunate for me that physical affection is no more my love language than it was his.

I guess the closest I can get is to say that I enjoy weekend mornings cuddling in bed with my son and our pets. And I enjoyed it when my son was younger he liked to brush my hair.


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## Pam (Oct 7, 2010)

My husband has been gone almost seven years. I mostly miss lying in bed with my head on his shoulder and his arms around me, just chatting. One night I dreamed we were lying like that, and he was holding me and letting me cry. I miss him so much.


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## Haiku (Apr 9, 2014)

Nothing said love to me more than when she gave me a pneumothorax. 😍


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## hifromme67 (Oct 30, 2016)

All of the above. Unfortunately my husband is terrified of intimacy and has no need for physical touch. Me on the other hand, craves it.


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## Vinnydee (Jan 4, 2016)

My wife likes when I take her head in my hand and kiss her. She loves kissing. She also likes when I fondler her breasts and make her nipples hard.


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## MrsHolland (Jun 18, 2016)

There is a huge amount of physical affection in our home. I love it when he comes up from behind and kisses my neck, when out of the blue he will just look at me with love in his eyes, the way he holds my face in his hands and kisses me, when he brushes my hair, gives me a foot massage. We always hold hands when walking
We never leave the house without a kiss and "I love you". During the day send txts to say how much we love each other. The way he tells me he is the luckiest man on Earth.

He is a Gentleman and always walks or cycles with me to the inside, always lets me enter through a door first and holds the door for me. He makes me a coffee every morning and often breakfast if he has time.
He brings me flowers. Makes a cooked brekky every weekend. 

When we go out he will drop me at the door of where we are going if it is too hot, wet or a long way to walk if I am in heels, while he then goes to park.

We spend a lot of hours together and there is never a dull moment, talking, laughing, cooking together, it all makes me feel not just that he loves me but that he also likes me.

There is plenty more.


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

This thread is very encouraging in that it shows how many people have good marriages and good husbands. 
On a forum like this one, it would be easy to get discouraged with all the cheating, lies etc that go on.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*I'm a rather prolific neck kisser. Nothing really pleases me more than to come up from behind and gently brush her flowing hair aside, and then nuzzingly place my lips on the nape of her neck and to gently kiss away!

Intoxicating just to think about it! *


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## EllaSuaveterre (Oct 2, 2016)

I just got finished with another cuddle session with Mr. Suaveterre- or rather, am taking a breather in between them- and this thread pops up. 

I like my cuddles warm and tender, and of the sort where his hands wildly and fervently attempt to caress every single part of my body at once. I like when he tries to nuzzle me with his whole body. I love when he leans into me and inhales deeply, because he thinks my natural scent is the best perfume. I like our cuddles to be interspersed with normal, everyday conversation, like we were just talking about board games but we couldn't keep our hands off each other. I like the way he makes those little moans of happiness- not sexual pleasure, but pure contentment- and knowing that he's enjoying my presence that much makes me match him sigh for sigh. I like neck kisses and shoulder kisses and butterfly kisses and nosey kisses. I like giving and receiving impromptu massages and back scratches. I love the way he smells when he loves me. I. LOVE. this. man's. touch.

I love when we hold hands and squeeze each other in public. I love when I move in for a kiss ands he grins and says, "There's people watching" and I always say, "So let them be jealous" and kiss him. 

I love our goodbye ritual when he leaves for work- the snuggles and kisses and "I-love-you-I'll-miss-you-see-you-soon".

I love when he gets one of my Xxxxxxx texts and texts me back. I live when he texts me first even more. 

I love the gentle way he wakes me up, when he sits on the side of the bed and caresses me.


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## katiecrna (Jan 29, 2016)

The quite hand grab is so sweet to me, especially in the car ))

I love all sorts of cuddling. Any little touch that he does I find so sweet and endearing, it makes me feel loved. 
When he wakes up and goes to work and he kisses me on the head, sometimes he like touches my head/hair in a cute way. Sometimes he will grab my foot and kiss it. 

I wonder what kind of affection men like? Maybe we should make another thread.


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## katiecrna (Jan 29, 2016)

This is a nice lovey dovey thread before Valentine's Day


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## Celes (Apr 28, 2015)

I like it anyway I can get it. It's my top love language. I wish I would get it more but it's a work in progress. The other night, my husband pulled me close in his sleep. It felt really nice. He gave me a nice hug and kiss before going to work the other day. I also love it when we lay in bed and he stretches his leg to rub his foot against mine. The more affection I show him, the more he's reciprocating. So I'm grateful for that. I do miss the long hugs from behind he used to give me. Maybe I need to start doing it to him and see if he will start again.


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## kag123 (Feb 6, 2012)

Pam said:


> My husband has been gone almost seven years. I mostly miss lying in bed with my head on his shoulder and his arms around me, just chatting. One night I dreamed we were lying like that, and he was holding me and letting me cry. I miss him so much.


This post makes me feel guilty for admitting that I don't like being touched....when someone else is wishing so badly for it! My heart broke a little for you when reading this.


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

Touch is important to both of us. Physical affection from my husband that makes me feel loved and appreciated... 

A recent example, we were working on home-projects together. I was sweaty, dirty and hadn't showered, figuring I'd just have one afterwards. As he was getting close, I suggested he stay back because of the state of me. He replied, 'There's nothing wrong with hard-work..' Pulled me in for a big, sweaty kiss. But it's not just the affection; I noticed the look of admiration.

He will reach for my hand on the sofa. If my feet are across him, most of the time he will massage them and knows my preferences for pressure. When we're close and he realizes the moment would be better without clothes between us (which makes me chuckle), naked closeness; gently tracing my back or neck with his fingertips, being present and intimate. Showering together and scrubbing each others back. When he steps out first to get a towel to wrap (and hug) completely around me. Oh and moments such as waking in the night with muscle cramp and he's instantly up asking where it hurts / what he can do.


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## Pam (Oct 7, 2010)

kag123 said:


> This post makes me feel guilty for admitting that I don't like being touched....when someone else is wishing so badly for it! My heart broke a little for you when reading this.



Please don't feel guilty. My hope for you is that you will also find the person that you enjoy being touched by. Before my husband, I wasn't fond of being touched, either.


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## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

What he does

Occasionally holds my hand if we are out shopping
gives me hugs
breast fondling (not overly happy about this as too sexual for me)
tender kisses
massage my feet/arms if tired

I like all of the above but absolutely love his hand on the small of my back when we are out 
would also like more eye contact and attention when we are in social gatherings, we tend to do our own thing but that is probably due to years of conditioning as I didn't like PDA then


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## heartbroken50 (Aug 9, 2016)

I miss affection 


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