# Hurt and confused



## acappy (Oct 8, 2017)

Hi all, I have spent the last 24 years 16 of the married. We have had our ups and downs over the years. We have a 20 year old son and a 14 year old daughter. Everything seemed fine until early July when he completely shut me out. Fast forward to early September when he took our daughter to LA to see a Dodgers game, her brother tagged along. While at the airport waiting for a flight out son saw some very sexual text messages on his dads phone. I confronted him about it and he denied all of it. He said our marriage has been over for years and made all of it my fault, which I know is not true. He has since been staying with someone in an apartment near his work. He will not talk to me about any of it so I stopped asking. At this point we are in the process of divorce. Did he hit midlife crisis or is he just a jackass and I never noticed?


----------



## Rocky Mountain Yeti (Apr 23, 2017)

It's good you know this is not your fault. Making that claim is the cheaters go-to weapon: good on you for not allowing that weapon to be effective.

As to your specific question, my vote is "jackass."

Even with a so-called "mid life crisis," only a jackass uses that as an excuse to cheat and tries to blame it on his wife.


----------



## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

acappy said:


> Hi all, I have spent the last 24 years 16 of the married. We have had our ups and downs over the years. We have a 20 year old son and a 14 year old daughter. Everything seemed fine until early July when he completely shut me out. Fast forward to early September when he took our daughter to LA to see a Dodgers game, her brother tagged along. While at the airport waiting for a flight out son saw some very sexual text messages on his dads phone. I confronted him about it and he denied all of it. He said our marriage has been over for years and made all of it my fault, which I know is not true. He has since been staying with someone in an apartment near his work. He will not talk to me about any of it so I stopped asking. At this point we are in the process of divorce. Did he hit midlife crisis or is he just a jackass and I never noticed?


He is cheating or about to cheat and is using you as a scapegoat, cheaters lie to themselves. Proceed with divorce and take him for all he is worth. With any luck the oW will turn out to be a disaster and when he comes crawling back to you, you can kick him in the nuts.

Find out who it the OW, expose to her H or BF. Expose your WH to all family and friends before he rewrites history, tell them all about the crap he pulled on you, let him carry the shame.

Make an appointment with an IC for yourself, rely on your friends and family to help you through this.


----------

