# Vanesa here



## xesadori (Dec 16, 2020)

Been married 20 years. I love my husband for a million reasons, but he turned off the sex years ago. I've never cheated, but it's not normal to live like this.


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

Is there a reason he did so? If medical/hormonal, it can probably be treated, so you can encourage him to have the tests done and the right meds prescribed - most likely testosterone in some form. How is your communication and intimacy/affection? Otherwise, what - if anything - would you consider doing about it? Options range from doing nothing, asking for an open marriage, all the way to divorce. How old are you both?


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## StarFires (Feb 27, 2018)

You didn't give any details, so we don't know if he has a libido and masturbates (that you know about) but just won't have sex with you, or if he has no libido at all.

If the latter and he won't discuss it and won't go see a doctor, then you make him a doc appointment for complete physical and blood workup, and then drag him to the appointment. There could be almost anything affecting his sexual desire that could range from a serious medical condition to whacky hormones and lack of testosterone.

If the former, then boy do you need marriage counseling.


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## jayschmoove (Dec 25, 2020)

You also don't mention how old you and he are.

I'd never think to ask you, because you're a lady, but if he's older, this sort of thing does happen to many men of a certain age.


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