# A turn off?



## honeysuckle04 (Jan 25, 2011)

Is the fact that some women cannot have children in their 30's a turn off to men?


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## Okguy (Aug 25, 2015)

Nope


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

Depends.


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## jorgegene (May 26, 2012)

not to me at all. i love mamas, but after all, women are women.


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## rich84 (Mar 30, 2015)

Not necessarily, especially if he already has kids. May even be a plus!


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## depressedandexhausted (Aug 24, 2015)

I have two kids, when I start dating again, I will be looking for a woman who is done having children, or doesnt want them.


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## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

As with most things, the answer is "it depends". I'm 38 and dating, but also cannot have more children. 

I've mostly dated men in the 38-50 age range. I find some men are like me and don't want more children. Some have children but would like more, or at least claim to be open to the option of more. Others don't have any children and definitely _do_ want to have them in the future. I tend to screen out the guys who definitely want children, and am honest with those who are still on the fence about it. There are still plenty of very good guys to date who either don't want more kids or are okay with not having more.


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## depressedandexhausted (Aug 24, 2015)

Rowan said:


> As with most things, the answer is "it depends". I'm 38 and dating, but also cannot have more children.
> 
> I've mostly dated men in the 38-50 age range. I find some men are like me and don't want more children. Some have children but would like more, or at least claim to be open to the option of more. Others don't have any children and definitely _do_ want to have them in the future. I tend to screen out the guys who definitely want children, and am honest with those who are still on the fence about it. There are still plenty of very good guys to date who either don't want more kids or are okay with not having more.


I wonder if there are more guys then girls out there who dont want any more.


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## Anon1111 (May 29, 2013)

I think there is a big difference between "can't have kids", "doesn't want to have kids" and "hates kids"

the first one is totally fine and maybe even a bonus if you (as a man) already have kids and don't want more. it will be a dealbreaker for some men who want kids but just be upfront about it and weed them out.

the second one is also totally fine. it's a personal choice. again, just be upfront about it.

the third one is deeply unattractive in a woman in my opinion.


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## McDean (Jun 13, 2015)

Nope - it is what it is and far more common than many people are aware of.


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## P51Geo1980 (Sep 25, 2013)

honeysuckle04 said:


> Is the fact that some women cannot have children in their 30's a turn off to men?


Biology 101, STAT. Women certainly can have children in their 30's and into their 40's. After age 35-40, though, it becomes harder to for some women to conceive but is certainly possible.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

P51Geo1980 said:


> Biology 101, STAT. Women certainly can have children in their 30's and into their 40's. After age 35-40, though, it becomes harder to for some women to conceive but is certainly possible.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Ummm, I think that I and most other posters took the OP's initial post to mean _she_ cannot have children - not that it's impossible for any woman in her 30's to do so. Yes, many woman in their 30's, and even much older, can have children. However, some of us have lost our fertility due to medical and/or surgical reasons.


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## honeysuckle04 (Jan 25, 2011)

Rowan said:


> Ummm, I think that I and most other posters took the OP's initial post to mean _she_ cannot have children - not that it's impossible for any woman in her 30's to do so. Yes, many woman in their 30's, and even much older, can have children. However, some of us have lost our fertility due to medical and/or surgical reasons.


Yes _she_ can no longer have any children. 
:iagree:

No matter how I actually feel on it. Like my marriage that decision was also taken from me. got sick, almost bled to death, had to have that crap cut out. 
wah wah wah. blah blah blah. 

Look! Its after 5 my time. Time for a drink. I wish I drank.

Thanks all!! :grin2:


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

honeysuckle04 said:


> Yes _she_ can no longer have any children.
> :iagree:
> 
> No matter how I actually feel on it. *Like my marriage that decision was also taken from me. got sick, almost bled to death, had to have that crap cut out. *
> ...


What is so difficult about this.. and it's unfair !... if you wanted more kids ...but also.. when a woman has a hysterectomy, many hormones are no longer in force as they once were.. it takes a direct hit on her horniness, desire, ability to orgasm.. and THIS right here can be devastating for her husband.. AND HER.. it's premature, it's too early!... besides the loss of having another child.. this also could be at play ..

Though some get through it just fine, feeling more freedom here sexually .


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## Space Mountain (Jul 19, 2015)

Honeysuckle,

In your case as with others in your situation, it is not a turn off because the physical inability is not your fault and most important, it is definitely not a character flaw. You are still the same person. 

I also agree with what others have posted that as long as a woman is upfront about not wanting children or cannot have children and not being deceptive just to catch a spouse, then that would not be a deal breaker either. All cards are on the table and everyone knows the rules.


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