# Masturbation



## tdr64am (May 2, 2009)

I am truly curious about something. There are numerous mentions throughout the posts about the normality of married men masturbating. Not counting the men who are being denied by their partners - do a majority of married men with "normal" (dangerous word) sex lives masturbate? And by clarification I mean by themselves and not part of a sex act with their partner.
Since I have been married I have never considered it. If something arousing is on TV or something, it may add to the next sex-time; but running off on my own and taking care of myself truly never enters into my mind.

Before anyone declares "open season" on this post, maybe I am way out of step and should even ask the question the other way: Are there married men who don't masturbate?

I am truly curious.


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## jivey (Jun 18, 2009)

My wife gets pissed if i masturbate with out her. She wants to take care of all my needs.
Sometimes it hard as she is walking out of the bedroom in the morning to go to work and she is looking all hott and sexy in her suit of confidence. I really want to be with her. but, i can't wait 8-9 hrs for her to come home.
I always make up for it when she comes home. She is half naked before she get in the house.

We play our favorite game...Cowboys and Indians


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## dcrim (Oct 1, 2008)

In the morning..when I went to brush my teeth...I'd masturbate, too. It was just something I'd do.


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## amberlynn (May 24, 2009)

my husband and i have been together for 4 years, married for 3.. and hes NEVER "handle" himself.. Ive even asked him too when I wouldnt be in the "mood" for sex.. he says "i dont like whacking off, its nasty" ... he says hes NEVER done it.. not even in his teen years..remind you hes not 24.. he would rather me "whack" him off then do it himself... if he's in the mood befor he goes to work, and normally the baby is awake, then he will wait it out 8-12hrs until he gets home that night... i dont understand it.. i thought it was a natural thing... I cant wait to see MT's responce on this subject >=)


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## dcrim (Oct 1, 2008)

Yeah, me too. I don't know of any male that doesn't do it! Nasty??? For something that feels so good? Yeah, right!


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## amberlynn (May 24, 2009)

he says it just feels weird.. but if it feels weird for him to do it.. wouldnt it feel weird if i done it for him? ... most of the time i go to bed befor he does, and once i fall asleep, i dont wanna be woke up for a quicky.. so instead of fixing himself, he'll lay on his side and just hump the bed until he falls asleep...

however.. he has fallin asleep.. or claimed to be asleep, and says he didnt know he was doin it, but, be humpin me.. and it eventually turn into a quicky.. and its all because i get woken up with a stiffy in my rear... im so thankful i dont have the same equipment men have.. i couldnt handle it.


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

amberlynn said:


> I cant wait to see MT's responce on this subject >=)


You won't like it 

In my opinion, there is nothing wrong with married men playing with it, but they should not solo ejaculate unless they are having sex less than once per month. There are 2 reasons for this:

1)If they have wives that like sex, they should save all their sexual energy for her. 

2)If they have wives that have gone off sex, they need to let the frustration build up so that it motivates them to *do something* about it. By letting off steam with solo ejaculations, the pressure to fix the marriage will be less.

I do certain "exercises" that involve self stimulation, but when I get to the edge I stop, and wait until things calm down before resuming. Yesterday, I was not able to stop fast enough, but that only happens 2 or 3 times a year. However, I did not let a drop out because I have developed my pelvic floor muscles to the point where I can clench and hold until the contractions pass. 

I hope that answers your question 

PS. There are many threads here on TAM where women complain that hubby whacks off to porn all day, and never wants sex with his them. If they cut out the solo ejaculations, most of them would want sex, even if they couldn't stand their wives. It's just a cop-out.

On the other hand, most people agree that zero ejaculations are not healthy. So in a sexless marriage where the woman has gone off sex, a maintenance routine is required, of between once per week to once per month depending on the age of the man.


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## Sandy55 (Jun 3, 2009)

dcrim said:


> In the morning..when I went to brush my teeth...I'd masturbate, too. It was just something I'd do.


:rofl: Darn, am _truly_ impressed with the coordination you have dcrim! The mental image is truly entertaining :rofl:! 

_Pat your tummy and rub your head at the same time_, too dcrim?

My dh doing himself is fine with me, without me, in between me...whatever. It just isn't an issue with us. 

He doesn't object to me doing me whenever either. He is gone for a week or more at a time. 

If I had to wait for him to return I'd be one "Crabby Patty"!


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## amberlynn (May 24, 2009)

it doesnt bother me that he doesnt pleasure himself.. its kinda kinky that he saves it and builds up for me, the more he saves, the more energy he has and the more he explodes.... altho it would be kinkier to watch him pleasure himself.. but.. it wont happen..but its okay... i dont mind helping.. i have my own special ways of workin him up.. :smthumbup:


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## Sandy55 (Jun 3, 2009)

MT: "...a maintenance routine is required, of between once per week to once per month depending on the age of the..." (car?)

:rofl: At times, _MT_, your sex advice regarding frequency sounds like a routine oil change for a car....:rofl:


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## amberlynn (May 24, 2009)

Sandy55 said:


> MT:
> :rofl: At times, _MT_, your sex advice regarding frequency sounds like a routine oil change for a car....:rofl:


:lol::rofl:


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

Sandy55 said:


> MT: "...a maintenance routine is required, of between once per week to once per month depending on the age of the..." (car?)
> 
> :rofl: At times, _MT_, your sex advice regarding frequency sounds like a routine oil change for a car....:rofl:


I blew a van up a while ago going flat-out on the freeway because I forgot to check the oil level before setting off. No joke


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## Sandy55 (Jun 3, 2009)

Yes, MT, we _KNOW_ you were not thinking of your _car!_ :rofl:

U sew funee, MT.:rofl:


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

...but I topped it up with the sperm I had been retaining all month and went quietly on my way 






(just kidding, don't try this at home folks).


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## Sandy55 (Jun 3, 2009)

:lol::rofl::rofl::rofl:

Holy sh*t. :rofl::rofl: My sides hurt from laughing.....


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## Rhea (May 16, 2009)

MarkTwain said:


> ...but I topped it up with the sperm I had been retaining all month and went quietly on my way
> 
> 
> 
> ...



OMG I just spewed beer out of every orophus in my face cause I busted out laughing mid gulp...I shall never take a drink of any said tasty beverage again while reading one of MT's posts or responses. :rofl:


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

Yes I do wack off all the time when my wife is not home, sometimes when she is sleeping next to me, She rather me take care of business then wake her up...lol

But when I do, usually my wife is the visual in my mind, her doing something in my sexual fantasy land that I know would never happen in reality. 

My wife also masturbates herself when I am not home with her toy.


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

you people are sick.................


i like that


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## revitalizedhusband (Feb 9, 2009)

amberlynn said:


> my husband and i have been together for 4 years, married for 3.. and hes NEVER "handle" himself.. Ive even asked him too when I wouldnt be in the "mood" for sex.. he says "i dont like whacking off, its nasty" ... he says hes NEVER done it.. not even in his teen years..remind you hes not 24.. he would rather me "whack" him off then do it himself... if he's in the mood befor he goes to work, and normally the baby is awake, then he will wait it out 8-12hrs until he gets home that night... i dont understand it.. i thought it was a natural thing... I cant wait to see MT's responce on this subject >=)



He's BS'n you, he might not do it now, but any man who says they didn't masturbate as a teenager, even a few times, is lying.


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## revitalizedhusband (Feb 9, 2009)

I do at times, and for me its indirectly proportional to the frequency of sex at the time.

If we are having sex a lot, I could go months without masturbating, if we aren't, I might do it a few times a week.


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## Sixgunner (Mar 5, 2008)

I beat it like it owes me money.:rofl:

:gun:


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## amberlynn (May 24, 2009)

Sixgunner said:


> I beat it like it owes me money.:rofl:
> 
> :gun:


:lol::rofl:


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## Rhea (May 16, 2009)

OMG....thank god women don't refer to masturbation as "beating it" oh the pictures that flash through my mind on that one....woah.


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## Mommybean (Jan 22, 2009)

My H does it, and I don't care. As long as I'm still getting mine, what he does in his spare time is his business.


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## TRACER (Jun 9, 2009)

Why is it wrong for a married man to masterbate? I am a married woman and I pleasure myself. Your partner can't always be there when you need them.


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## Amplexor (Feb 13, 2008)

Sixgunner said:


> I beat it like it owes me money.:rofl:
> 
> :gun:


:rofl::rofl::rofl:


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## Rhea (May 16, 2009)

amberlynn said:


> he says it just feels weird.. but if it feels weird for him to do it.. wouldnt it feel weird if i done it for him? ... most of the time i go to bed befor he does, and once i fall asleep, i dont wanna be woke up for a quicky.. so instead of fixing himself, *he'll lay on his side and just hump the bed until he falls asleep...*FOR REAL? HUMP THE BED?
> 
> however.. he has fallin asleep.. or claimed to be asleep, and says he didnt know he was doin it, but, be humpin me.. and it eventually turn into a quicky.. and its all because i get woken up with a stiffy in my rear... im so thankful i dont have the same equipment men have.. i couldnt handle it.


WOW :rofl:


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## dobo (Jun 30, 2009)

I'd be pissed if the lower interest partner were mastubating.

Since I'm the higher interest partner, I can say that with some authority!!!

Wanting to get off w/o all of the "hassle" of sex seems like a relationship problem. That's a frequent excuse for masturbation. 

Further, if you know your partner will be with you shortly, masturbation robs them of your passion. I won't say I never do it, but I know that it isn't the right thing when I do. I always feel guilty because I've just taken for myself what I could later share with him. And that's selfish.


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## dcrim (Oct 1, 2008)

I laughed sooo hard! For 15 minutes, at least! Out loud!  I liked the idea of topping it off!  Thanks, MT!


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## Sandy55 (Jun 3, 2009)

Rhea said:


> OMG....thank god women don't refer to masturbation as "beating it" oh the pictures that flash through my mind on that one....woah.



:iagree::lol::rofl:


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## Sandy55 (Jun 3, 2009)

We must have more masturbation threads, this is just hysterical!!:smthumbup::rofl::rofl:

Somebody start a thread on what do you think about....


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## Rhea (May 16, 2009)

So far I've heard

*I beat it like it owes me money (that could quite possibly be the best one I've EVER heard if not it's close)

*whack it

There are old standby's

*Spanking your Monkey

I just wonder what else you men refer to it as? And why is there not so many said terminologies for women? Someone should make up some funny ones there....I tried to think of some and well...I got nothin


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## dcrim (Oct 1, 2008)

Rhea...just google "terms for masturbation"...I came up with this link: Masturbation Terms

It has both male & female terms.


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## DownButNotOut (Apr 9, 2009)

Rhea said:


> So far I've heard
> 
> *I beat it like it owes me money (that could quite possibly be the best one I've EVER heard if not it's close)
> 
> ...


How about 'Rub One Out'? 

To me why shouldn't the higher-sexed partner masturbate? If the lower-sexed partner is happy with the frequency, and not interested in increasing, their partner has to find relief somehow. Wouldn't masturbation be the logical plan B?


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## Conflicted (Jun 24, 2009)

DownButNotOut said:


> To me why shouldn't the higher-sexed partner masturbate? If the lower-sexed partner is happy with the frequency, and not interested in increasing, their partner has to find relief somehow. Wouldn't masturbation be the logical plan B?


I agree, but then the lower-sexed partner can also help now and then in that department.


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## gabejoel (Jul 8, 2009)

My hubby does not masturbate...only on the occasion and we make it a fun hot game ..even if it solo.Like he has taped it for me or told me how in detail!It is quite fun, but he does'nt so he can keep up with me.


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

Rhea said:


> So far I've heard
> 
> *I beat it like it owes me money (that could quite possibly be the best one I've EVER heard if not it's close)


:iagree:

But I won't give up my day job


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## DownButNotOut (Apr 9, 2009)

Conflicted said:


> I agree, but then the lower-sexed partner can also help now and then in that department.


Absolutely...if willing...

If not, I can only see three choices
1. Chew through phone books in frustration
2. Take care of yourself
3. Look outside

My vote is for #2.


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## Blonddeee (Dec 17, 2008)

Wow... i really need sex... this is hilarious :rofl::rofl::smthumbup:


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## dcrim (Oct 1, 2008)

Blonddee...I'm up for that!


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## cao428 (Jun 26, 2008)

This thread gave me such a laugh! :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl: thanks!!!!!

My hub has traveled and still does in his job..When the marriage was young he would tell me it was difficult without me for 3 months so I suggested he stroke the pony, choke the chicken or whatever you want to call it while talking with me on the phone. (heavy breathing on my end for him and sometimes mutual pleasuring on my end of the line. It was a way for us to stay connected sexually. And so was our routine for many years. 
I always wondered after cordless phones happened whom else might be benefiting...? It has stopped in the last few years which is disappointing as he is still away for extended periods. But it's his call...

Everyone's different and there's nothing wrong with pleasuring oneself, but I think if you can be with your partner first you should be or try to be. If you want to pleasure each other manually...up to what you're comfortable with, so let it be! 

I definitely think it has a place in marriages but I hate the word and just wish someone would think of a different name! Mas-tur-ba-tion UGH! Any ideas for a new word??


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## cao428 (Jun 26, 2008)

This thread gave me such a laugh! :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl: thanks!!!!!

My hub has traveled and still does in his job..When the marriage was young he would tell me it was difficult without me for 3 months so I suggested he stroke the pony, choke the chicken or whatever you want to call it while talking with me on the phone. (heavy breathing on my end for him and sometimes mutual pleasuring on my end of the line. It was a way for us to stay connected sexually and emotionally. And so was our routine for many years. 

I always wondered after cordless phones happened whom else might be benefiting...? It has stopped in the last few years which is disappointing as he is still away for extended periods. But it's his call...

I definitely think it has a part in marriage but I hate the word and just wish someone would think of a different name! Mas-tur-ba-tion UGH! Any ideas for a new word??


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## dcrim (Oct 1, 2008)

CAO, Several years ago, I was in an "interim" job (less pay, but income). 

I spent the week about 2 hours from home and home on weekends. 

I rented a room from a lady for the week. 

During the trip I had a CB and a scanner in my vehicle, both removable. 

While in the house one week, I had the scanner running and I caught a cordless phone conversation (this was before digital encryption). It was hot! 

It turned out to be her daughter (across the small creek) and her BF. I locked in the frequency!  

One time, at home, my son was talking to his GF and my scanner caught it. 

I plugged it into the PC and recorded a few minutes of the conversation. 

After the call was done, I played the recording back...he came around looking everywhere for the sound of him and GF!  

I deleted the recording after that...but it was fun. 

Scanners are fun!  

Mostly I used it on trips to listen to the police frequencies (for trouble spots) and on local trips I listened to the traffic helicopters and TV channels.

Ok, back to your regularly schedule program...


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## cao428 (Jun 26, 2008)

Dcrim,

LOL...more laughs! I hope whomever might have heard us in the small town we lived in enjoyed it half as much as we did! 

Thanks for more laughs!

Just wish we had more regularly scheduled programs and not sure why we don't..


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## jake_J (Jul 2, 2009)

I’m not a master of my own domain, if you know what I mean. I can’t go too long without the need for a release. If it’s that time of the month, I generally masturbate daily, until my wife is ready to go. 

And on nights when I know I’m not going to get lucky, I masturbate right before I go to bed – I’m asleep before my head hits the pillow…and I have GREAT dreams. 


I do this, however, without the wife knowing. And so far, knock on wood (pun intended), I haven’t been caught doing it solo. However, my wife does love to watch me stroke myself when we’re together. 

As someone mentioned, ALL guys do it frequently. Those who don’t are either highly religious or a liar.


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## dcrim (Oct 1, 2008)

Jake, why don't you let her watch? 

If it's the monthly thing she could still enjoy it. 

If she's not into it on any particular night (e.g. you had a fight), I'd understand...but you could mention that you're going to be busy for a few minutes (or however long). 

It might get her to thinking she's missing out on something.


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## voivod (Aug 7, 2008)

DownButNotOut said:


> How about 'Rub One Out'?
> 
> To me why shouldn't the higher-sexed partner masturbate? If the lower-sexed partner is happy with the frequency, and not interested in increasing, their partner has to find relief somehow. Wouldn't masturbation be the logical plan B?


didn't see these on your link:

..."making gravy"...

..."stirring the dondue"...


and this one includes both partners...a porn visual...and a crude method of birth control...


..."making a map of hawaii (on her belly)"...

carry on you twisted soldiers


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## Rhea (May 16, 2009)

LMAO! at all the "terminologies"....


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## Sixgunner (Mar 5, 2008)

Heard this one the other day. 

*Fire off some knuckle-children*

:lol:


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