# Phase 2 Getting healthy



## Erudite (Jan 28, 2015)

Okay guys! I am ready for the heat. I need to lose weight. I gained a crap ton of weight over the course of my marriage. It was partially, I am sure, why my marriage ended. This marriage broke me down. Stress and depression and worry and fatigue and lack of self confidence have really hindered my adhesion to diet and exercise. I never thought I could leave him, but I did. I never thought I could buy my own home,, but I did. So if I could do those things why can't I lose weight? The thing is I don't know where to start. I am not a good cook (prep work after a long day kills me, as does the clean up process.) Help!


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## bobert (Nov 22, 2018)

Erudite said:


> Okay guys! I am ready for the heat. I need to lose weight. I gained a crap ton of weight over the course of my marriage. It was partially, I am sure, why my marriage ended. This marriage broke me down. Stress and depression and worry and fatigue and lack of self confidence have really hindered my adhesion to diet and exercise. I never thought I could leave him, but I did. I never thought I could buy my own home,, but I did. So if I could do those things why can't I lose weight? The thing is I don't know where to start. I am not a good cook (prep work after a long day kills me, as does the clean up process.) Help!


Can you meal prep a week or more worth on the weekend (or another day you have off)? Or do dinner prep each morning before work, that way the cutting, dishes, etc. is done and you just have to cook when you get home? Also, cleaning up as you go (instead of after dinner) can help a lot.

You don't have to do extravagant meals, and personally, I'd say have a weekly menu and just stick to that. 

You will have to figure out what works for you though. I know that what works for me doesn't work for some friends but does for others. So it could be a bit of trial and error.


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## DudeInProgress (Jun 10, 2019)

Different people/different body types may respond better to different nutrition (diet) plans, but some form of low carb (and low/no sugar) plan is key and seems to work for most people.

My wife lost about 20 pounds in a month and got down to her ideal weight (not the doctors healthy range chart, where one could still be chubby but “healthy“ - her actual ideal weight) on keto.
That’s without even exercising. And since you’re eating a fair amount of protein and a lot of healthy fats, you can actually be full and not hungry all the time.

Whatever you do, you have to plan ahead and do your meal prep ahead of time, preferably for the week. If you don’t exercise the discipline to do that, you will fail at any nutrition plan.


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## Erudite (Jan 28, 2015)

DudeInProgress said:


> Different people/different body types may respond better to different nutrition (diet) plans, but some form of low carb (and low/no sugar) plan is key and seems to work for most people.
> 
> My wife lost about 20 pounds in a month and got down to her ideal weight (not the doctors healthy range chart, where one could still be chubby but “healthy“ - her actual ideal weight) on keto.
> That’s without even exercising. And since you’re eating a fair amount of protein and a lot of healthy fats, you can actually be full and not hungry all the time.
> ...


I know people think it is a matter of discipline and I am trying hard not to make excuses for myself...but I do need to solve 2 problems. 1 is fatigue. I know I will gain energy as the weight comes off but I am so frigging tired! And 2 which also plays into 1..I drive 44 min each way. By the time I get home around 6 I am starving and if I don't eat til 7.. well most of the time I don't choose healthy..usually pasta...


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## AVR1962 (May 30, 2012)

Have you heard of Noom? You can get the app for free which allows you to track meals and exercise. If you pay for the program it has lots of recorded information that help you to understand healthy eating habits. You can also pay for a groups coach. I found the program to be really good.


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

I have in the past had good luck with WW, especially to get started. Lots of support, lots of flexibility, not a lot of complicated diet cooking and stuff (unless you want that). It’s simple to follow and has an app to help. $22/month I think?


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## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

I often grill a pack of boneless, skinless chicken thighs on Sunday or a pork tenderloin and reheat during the week along with some stir-fry vegetables or a salad. I like turkey burgers and make a batch now and then (they freeze well) to have with Asian slaw. I also try to have at least one meatless meal a week. When I have pasta, it’s very simple with protein and vegetables and a vinaigrette dressing. Same for stir-fry and the one-pot recipes that I have so many of. I’ll also prep a vegetable pizza with a little protein on Sunday and have half one night and half another night along with a salad. I sometimes make a batch of crab cakes and freeze them individually. If I do prep on Sunday, I have nothing to do during the week but reheat. It’s very rare that I miss Sunday prep and have to cook during the week but if I do it’s something that’s quick and easy and that’s what I look for when I’m trying new recipes. I do intermittent fasting and only eat two meals a day (and those are fairly small servings). That takes some getting used to but I’ve done it for three years now and it helps keep my weight where it needs to be. I dislike cooking so I make it as simple as possible and I clean as I go. That cuts down on the frustration for me.


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

I have learned a lot about cauliflower rice. I can do Mexican, Asian and even a version that tastes like Thanksgiving stuffing. I’m working on a mushroom risotto recipe for it but it’s hard to do with no cream. I’ll keep trying though. Very versatile and is basically nothing calorie wise. Roasted cauliflower and broccoli is good, and my grocery store does shredded white meat chicken that is super easy to toss in a salad or in cauliflower rice or even in soup.


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

Erudite said:


> Okay guys! I am ready for the heat. I need to lose weight. I gained a crap ton of weight over the course of my marriage. It was partially, I am sure, why my marriage ended. This marriage broke me down. Stress and depression and worry and fatigue and lack of self confidence have really hindered my adhesion to diet and exercise. I never thought I could leave him, but I did. I never thought I could buy my own home,, but I did. So if I could do those things why can't I lose weight? The thing is I don't know where to start. I am not a good cook (prep work after a long day kills me, as does the clean up process.) Help!


I used to grill enough meat on the barbecue grill once a week to last me all week when I was dieting and then have fruit for breakfast and a non-potato vegetable with the meat. I might have a salad before bed or even a small cookie but that would be all I ate for like 5 days of the week and exercise every day.


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

Erudite said:


> I know people think it is a matter of discipline and I am trying hard not to make excuses for myself...but I do need to solve 2 problems. 1 is fatigue. I know I will gain energy as the weight comes off but I am so frigging tired! And 2 which also plays into 1..I drive 44 min each way. By the time I get home around 6 I am starving and if I don't eat til 7.. well most of the time I don't choose healthy..usually pasta...


It's good that you have identified some barriers to your goal.

I would suggest that if you adjusted some of your eating patterns (regardless of weight-loss), that your energy may increase as a result. How about just setting some small goals related to your fatigue first off?

Example could be: Have boiled eggs or Greek yogurt on hand that you eat before your drive home. This may prevent you from feeling 'starving' by the time that you get home, and then give you time to prepare meals that are more aligned to your over-all goal of weight-loss. Yes, having some foods prepared will likely help with this. However, you need to be realistic of where you're at to set yourself up right from the start. Small wins. And so, perhaps goal number 1 is eat hard-boiled eggs or yogurt before driving home. It's a snack. Then perhaps goal number 2 is having chicken or a protein at the ready at home that you could then make with some vegetables or salad. Goal number 3 could be ensuring that you're drinking 'enough' water.

I'm not a dietician or nutritionist, however, my weight and energy stays steadier when I ensure that I eat breakfast, small snack, lunch, small snack, dinner. Preferably with a focus on protein.

Start simple. If you're into this idea. Then perhaps try 3 x days of the above method just pertaining to pre-drive home, adjust dinner, and drink water. See how you go. I will add one other little thing, I do like freshly squeezed lemon with hot water preferably first thing in the morning, or I might drink intermittently during the day. 

How much weight do you feel that you need to lose for health?


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

You shouldn't be starving so bring a snack for the drive.

I think people tend to underestimate how much they consume. Studies have been done where a group of overweight women are asked what they think they consume in a day and the average answer is 1200 calories.

Then they kept journals and were shocked to realize they were actually consuming 2-3 times as much. It's not that they lied, it's that it's difficult to keep track of drinks and snacks. And the biggest calorie bomb for women is salad because of all the crap that gets added. Us women in our 40's and up don't need that many calories unless you get into endurance sports, and even then it's way easier to eat then to burn off.

So I'd recommend you start with a food journal so you can get a handle on what you're actually eating and drinking...then you can make changes.

Start looking for opportunities to walk and try to cut yourself off after 8 pm.


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

My friend recently got an app where he weighs servings and scans the UPC on boxes and it keeps track of his caloric intake. You output your workouts into it, height, and current weight (BMI) and then the app tells you a bunch of stats.

So he is like “If I do what I did yesterday in 5 weeks I will be X.” It seems to be motivating for him. He’s a small guy and very active so his weight loss zone is ~1800 cal/day to hit his goal before an event.

My weight loss zone is more like ~2900 calories a day. So what I do to keep track is I know how much calories meat is and I know how many pounds I bought, then I know how many calories the whole box or bag of whatever I am cooking is. So I make dinner for 2 people and I make all of the ingredients. So the finished dish (huge amount) I know how much calories it would be if I ate the whole thing. So I just eat part of it to get around where I am supposed to be. So I don’t keep perfect track of it.

Same thing with working out, I don’t wear an activity tracker or anything but I know how hard I went and what I did and have an idea of roughly what the burn was.


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## Laurentium (May 21, 2017)

If you consume alcohol, cutting out alcohol is an experiment well worth trying.


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## Laurentium (May 21, 2017)

Erudite said:


> I don't choose healthy..usually pasta...


Don't have it in the house.


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

Other tricks:

I only eat between noon and 8pm, no calories from anything outside of that other than black coffee ~15cal.

For lunch I don’t cook. I only eat Subway, sushi, Poke bowl (some kind of yam noodles and brown rice), and a burrito bowl (no cheese, sour cream, etc…) or chicken and rice soup and a small salad. From Subway I get a sandwich that is 1040 cal, then I add extra ham to it at home from the fridge and I end up only eating the meat and produce out of the second half of it (I toss the bread). Same with the other stuff, I customize it and usually end up throwing part of it out. So I never end up eating the whole lunch.

So I “waste” a lot of food but then it doesn’t get waisted.

Don’t drink any diet drinks either or sugar substitutes.


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## In Absentia (Aug 21, 2012)

Laurentium said:


> If you consume alcohol, cutting out alcohol is an experiment well worth trying.


I lost two stones when I stopped drinking... started again, and I've put them back...


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## Laurentium (May 21, 2017)

In Absentia said:


> I lost two stones when I stopped drinking... started again, and I've put them back...


People in the US may not know what you mean when you say you lost your two stones....


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## In Absentia (Aug 21, 2012)

Laurentium said:


> People in the US may not know what you mean when you say you lost your two stones....


Sorry, being from the continent I never understood the crazy imperial measurements. Total waste of time and total torture for me... lol.. I guess I should have said "two stone"?


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

Stone = 14lbs


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## In Absentia (Aug 21, 2012)

ccpowerslave said:


> Stone = 14lbs


You are not helping...  I lost about 12kg...


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## jppaul5280 (5 mo ago)

something free is to post your weight here and maybe people here can help hold you accountable. 

I'm 5'10" and 244#. When I met my wife i was 185# and riding my bicycle about 150 miles a week. I gave up everything in my life (including neglecting my wife). The only thing I've done over the past dozen years was work and be a great dad. My wife loves how good of a father I am, but is disappointed with everything else. 

She told me Saturday. I haven't had alcohol since, been eating better, and doing a little exercises. 

I didn't mean to make my post about me, but maybe use this thread to keep track of your progress (even if slow, because slow is still progress) and maybe some member(s) can help hold you accountable?


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## TXTrini (Oct 2, 2013)

Erudite said:


> Okay guys! I am ready for the heat. I need to lose weight. I gained a crap ton of weight over the course of my marriage. It was partially, I am sure, why my marriage ended. This marriage broke me down. Stress and depression and worry and fatigue and lack of self confidence have really hindered my adhesion to diet and exercise. I never thought I could leave him, but I did. I never thought I could buy my own home, but I did. So if I could do those things, why can't I lose weight? The thing is I don't know where to start. I am not a good cook (prep work after a long day kills me, as does the clean-up process.) Help!


Girl, I feel you. I was in a similar state, completely worn down and dealing with serious medical issues for the first year or two after the divorce. Congratulations on starting a better life!

I'd recommend the first thing to do is get a complete physical and square away any health issues before you make any big changes. 

Next, it sounds like you need a system, as time is tight during the week. Meal prep is great, @heartsbeating 's idea about high protein snacks is great. One caution, read all labels for packaged food; you'd be surprised how much hidden sugar there is in everything! Yogurt can be tricky; ask me how I know🤦‍♀️ . I've been buying Ratio, Oikos High Protein zero sugar (sweetened with stevia), Chobani Zero, and Two Good (whichever's on sale). Nuts are good, too; you can buy them in bulk and take some with you in a little container. I'd weigh it, though; they're calorie-dense. I also keep protein shakes handy; maybe keep some in your desk at work? They're not great at room temp, but they're ok in a pinch.

You could check out myfitnesspal.com; it's free. It lets you see exactly what you consume and how much you burn. When you see what actual portion sizes look like and how long it takes you to burn excess calories, that alone helps keep you accountable. 

Remember that you didn't put it on overnight, so don't be discouraged that it takes time and effort to lose it. Think of this as a lifestyle change instead of a diet; diets suck! I'm finally getting back on the wagon with this, too, so you've got some company.


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## CountryMike (Jun 1, 2021)

ccpowerslave said:


> Other tricks:
> 
> I only eat between noon and 8pm, no calories from anything outside of that other than black coffee ~15cal.
> 
> ...


I'm the same. I do try to cut off at 7pm though. It does work. I lost 40lbs.


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## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

Yes, it needs to be a lifestyle choice and not a diet. Because when diets end then weight tends to creep back. When I started intermittent fasting several years ago I also started weighing myself regularly because it keeps me accountable. I didn’t think I could limit myself to only eating during a seven to eight hour window every day but I did and now it’s not difficult at all. The important thing is to find what you’re most comfortable with and what works best. That makes it all much easier.


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## TXTrini (Oct 2, 2013)

Openminded said:


> Yes, it needs to be a lifestyle choice and not a diet. Because when diets end then weight tends to creep back. When I started intermittent fasting several years ago I also started weighing myself regularly because it keeps me accountable. I didn’t think I could limit myself to only eating during a seven to eight hour window every day but I did and now it’s not difficult at all. The important thing is to find what you’re most comfortable with and what works best. That makes it all much easier.


Intermittent fasting is easier than you think, but you only see a huge drop in weight if you have a huge amount to lose. However, I think it's great for maintenance. I haven't had time or energy to work out but have maintained what I lost, despite still eating crap sometimes (stress eating is a *****!).


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## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

TXTrini said:


> Intermittent fasting is easier than you think, but you only see a huge drop in weight if you have a huge amount to lose. However, I think it's great for maintenance. I haven't had time or energy to work out but have maintained what I lost, despite still eating crap sometimes (stress eating is a ***!).


Yes, it’s maintenance for me. I did lose a few pounds when I started — which was great but not the reason I tried it — and now it’s just second nature to do. I don’t even get hungry at this point during the fasting period.


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## theloveofmylife (Jan 5, 2021)

If you can't prep, try Atkins (or any brand) prepared meals/bars/shakes for a quick start. You'll drop a couple pounds right away, which should motivate you to continue. Have plenty of stuff in the house for (healthy) salads. Have a wrap with lettuce instead of a sandwich using bread. Back WAY off the salt and sugar and drink more water. Definitely MOVE more. It will help with the fatigue as well. 

Headed off to work, but this is a good jumping off point. Best wishes.


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