# This morning I'm leaving



## DEMI6 (Apr 12, 2017)

Today is the day ! 
I have had enough, together for 5 yrs 
Married 3 yrs..NO CHILDREN together 
But all together we had 7 children me having 4..him having 3

The emotional abuse.
Verbal abuse.
Not having a job.
Not even attempting to try & help.
The marijuana is his life. We had just had a conversation about saving & the next week he calls me telling me. He will no longer smoke trash weed only the finest..😣
Which put us in the hole 400 that week.
Yes I smoke also, but it's not my life.
If we had to save I can stop or smoke less
He says his problems he has with me is I DONT RESPECT HIM. OR LISTEN TO HIM ENOUGH I roll my eyes when he is speaking & I wave him off litterraly.

He hasn't worked in any of the years when have been together.
When I'm home I wait on him hand & foot.
I cook 
He eats & leaves the dish for me. To take from the room
I once tried to hand him his plate after I cooked cause he was standing in the kitchen.
He walked away after he saw me try & hand it to him. Sat in the living room & I had to bring it out..
He has everything he ever wanted.
Well at least I think.

I just cant do it anymore .
I FEEL like **** today

I feel sad that I have to do this 



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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

So, uhh, how's he gonna buy his buds without your income? Guess he'll have to get a job, huh?

Unemployed pot heads are the worst. You're abolutely right in leaving. And I'm saying that as someone who also indulges.


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## Daisy12 (Jul 10, 2016)

Why did you feel like you have to put up with so much crap from this man. We teach people how to treat us and when you put up with crap, you get crap. 

Was he likes this when you were dating or first married, or did he change or were you wearing rose colored glasses? 

I have a agree that getting out of this relationship for now would be the best for you and your kids. The 400 dollars a week on pot would be enough alone to end it for me.

Which makes me ask what is a couple with 7 children doing smoking weed anyway? Is there not better things to be doing with your money and time. Perhaps is there maybe some addiction issues in this relationship as well?

I would recommend that you dump your husband, quit smoking weed and get some counselling to help work on yourself. I don't think a decent family man with a good job and good values is smoking 400 dollar worth of weed a week, nor do I think he's probably looking for a woman how will take people's crap and smokes weed herself but I have been known to be wrong. 

Don't feel bad about leaving, do what's best for you and your children. 




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## DEMI6 (Apr 12, 2017)

Daisy12 said:


> Why did you feel like you have to put up with so much crap from this man. We teach people how to treat us and when you put up with crap, you get crap.
> 
> Was he likes this when you were dating or first married, or did he change or were you wearing rose colored glasses?
> 
> ...


I have no idea why I put up with this..
Only 4 children lives with us..unfortunate that all 4 are mines.. so of course they have seen the most.
I smoke because it calms me..
I get nervous a lot.
I just do
Yes I plan to quit
I guess it keeps getting worse cause I allowed it.
I spoke with him last week & he told me he would never get a job..THAT WAS IT FOR ME! 

HE THROWS it in my face that my children are not his.

Say we are holding him back.
He has said hurtful things to my children

Ive done this before & came back like a fool. trying to save this **** of a marriage 

I guess it's because he is so smart.
Handsome .
& I know the potential he really had.

He is just the most selfish persons I have ever met.
He puts me down saying he looks better then me 
I'm fat & stupid 

He once told me anybody can use me..

I guess that was my sign & I just ignored it

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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*It's certainly not a failure because you didn't try, @DEMI6 !

I'd say that it's time to take one last, good long view of him from the rear-view mirror!

Congratulations in finally embracing your sanity! *


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## DEMI6 (Apr 12, 2017)

arbitrator said:


> *It's certainly not a failure because you didn't try, @DEMI6 !
> 
> I'd say that it's time to take one last, good long view of him from the rear-view mirror!
> 
> Congratulations in finally embracing your sanity! *


This hurts so bad

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## DEMI6 (Apr 12, 2017)

I know I can't live like this ANYMORE & I deserve so much better

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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

DEMI6 said:


> This hurts so bad
> 
> Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-J320AZ using Tapatalk


*I know that it does, Sweetheart!

But the reward is in finding that very special guy who will come to love and respect you for the woman and the lady who you truly are!

My prayers will always go with you!*


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## katies (May 19, 2015)

OMG run! Because you deserve better and you're setting an example for your children to do the same thing. 
How on earth did you marry someone who NEVER had a job while you were together? That is a giant red flag.


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

DEMI6 said:


> He hasn't worked in any of the years when have been together.
> When I'm home I wait on him hand & foot.
> I cook
> He eats & leaves the dish for me. To take from the room
> ...


Absolutely NO reason for you to stay with such an *******. Even his kids aren't a good enough reason to stay. The sooner you stop enabling him, the sooner his kids will be able to move on with their lives to a better parent or family.

That said, a couple of suggestions. First, please lay off the weed, unless you're in a legal state. You have children to consider and legal issues will do them no good. Once they're grown and moved out, do whatever you want.

Second, why on earth would you (1) allow a man to live with you without working and (2) wait on him hand and foot if he isn't even contributing? Let's be honest - you're just as much to blame for this situation as he is. Fix this issue in yourself before you date another man.


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## BradWesley2 (Jul 15, 2016)

DEMI6 said:


> Today is the day !
> I have had enough, together for 5 yrs
> Married 3 yrs..NO CHILDREN together
> But all together we had 7 children me having 4..him having 3
> ...


You sure you're not married to The Dude from the Big Lebowski movie?

Seriously leave him, you'll be better off without him.


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## Satya (Jun 22, 2012)

It might hurt now, but you'll be OK.


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## DEMI6 (Apr 12, 2017)

turnera said:


> Absolutely NO reason for you to stay with such an *******. Even his kids aren't a good enough reason to stay. The sooner you stop enabling him, the sooner his kids will be able to move on with their lives to a better parent or family.
> 
> That said, a couple of suggestions. First, please lay off the weed, unless you're in a legal state. You have children to consider and legal issues will do them no good. Once they're grown and moved out, do whatever you want.
> 
> Second, why on earth would you (1) allow a man to live with you without working and (2) wait on him hand and foot if he isn't even contributing? Let's be honest - you're just as much to blame for this situation as he is. Fix this issue in yourself before you date another man.


I agree 1,00000000000

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## DEMI6 (Apr 12, 2017)

Update I'm gone & safe 

He has now called all family members saying his goodbyes & how he wants his funeral planned out.
He told me he is going to kill himself 


What should I so?
I'm not going back

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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

DEMI6 said:


> Update I'm gone & safe
> 
> He has now called all family members saying his goodbyes & how he wants his funeral planned out.
> He told me he is going to kill himself
> ...


Ah, the good old manipulative suicide threat.....
Happens all the time with abusers.

Call 911 and send them to him..... once he sees the cops show up he'll either get the help he needs or stop trying to manipulate with suicide threats. 

Under no condition should you contact him.


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## DEMI6 (Apr 12, 2017)

lifeistooshort said:


> Ah, the good old manipulative suicide threat.....
> Happens all the time with abusers.
> 
> Call 911 and send them to him..... once he sees the cops show up he'll either get the help he needs or stop trying to manipulate with suicide threats.
> ...


Okay i will block now

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## Daisy12 (Jul 10, 2016)

Stay strong and keep telling yourself you deserve better because you do.



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## Cooper (Apr 18, 2008)

If you're out stay out! Don't cave into his emotional blackmail, don't start questioning yourself and looking back with rose colored glasses. Today your life just got better, and tomorrow will be better yet. People stay in bad situations because you become conditioned to it, and smoking weed makes you even more accepting and less motivated to put the effort into change. You will look back one your marriage one day and think "wow, what the **** was I thinking?" 

Best wishes.


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

DEMI6 said:


> Update I'm gone & safe
> 
> He has now called all family members saying his goodbyes & how he wants his funeral planned out.
> He told me he is going to kill himself
> ...


You should call 911 and tell them that your husband says he is committing suicide. Give them his address. Let them deal with him. Odds are pretty good he'll never pull that stunt again.


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## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

Be prepared for him to do everything he can think of to pull you back in. 

Don't let that happen.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Openminded said:


> Be prepared for him to do everything he can think of to pull you back in.
> 
> Don't let that happen.


@DEM16;

Remember that he cannot suck you back in if you cannot communicate with you. So good that you blocked your phone. Tell family and friends to not tell you anything about him. He's not your concern now. 

Does he know where you moved to? 

If he approaches you in person, just firmly tell him to leave you alone and go away. If you need to, get loud so that others hear you.

Do you have a lawyer lined up? File for divorce ASAP.


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## DEMI6 (Apr 12, 2017)

EleGirl said:


> @DEM16;
> 
> Remember that he cannot suck you back in if you cannot communicate with you. So good that you blocked your phone. Tell family and friends to not tell you anything about him. He's not your concern now.
> 
> ...


Yes & it's through my job so the lawyer is free.
I'm at my sister house for the night
My job is helping me so I will have everything I need


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

I guess you and all your children are at your sister's. I'm so glad she is there to help you. This has to be hard, especially with all your children in tow.

Were the two of you renting the place where you lived? Are you still on the hook for the rent? or do you own the place?


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## DEMI6 (Apr 12, 2017)

EleGirl said:


> I guess you and all your children are at your sister's. I'm so glad she is there to help you. This has to be hard, especially with all your children in tow.
> 
> Were the two of you renting the place where you lived? Are you still on the hook for the rent? or do you own the place?


Renting month to month lease.

Yes we are at my sister's house 
I'm also happy she's here for me as well..

I haven't been so nice to her


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Are you going to give the landlord the notice that you moved out so you don’t have that obligation? Could put him in a pickle pretty quickly. I guess he can now move in with his family.

Did you get all your stuff out of the place?


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*Stay strong, Sweetheart!

You, your children, and even your husband are in my prayers! Rest assured that the Lord will never put more onto your shoulders than you're capable of bearing!*


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## Satya (Jun 22, 2012)

Agree with the others - call 911 and let the professionals handle it.


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## DEMI6 (Apr 12, 2017)

EleGirl said:


> Are you going to give the landlord the notice that you moved out so you don’t have that obligation? Could put him in a pickle pretty quickly. I guess he can now move in with his family.
> 
> Did you get all your stuff out of the place?


Yes I told him &.
& i guess so


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Now just focus on yourself and your children. 

How are your children taking this?


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## Lostme (Nov 14, 2014)

I'm so happy to read you got out of there, you nor the children deserve that kind of life.

Stay strong you can get through this do it for the children and yourself, he is not worthy of having you.


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## She'sStillGotIt (Jul 30, 2016)

DEMI6 said:


> HE THROWS it in my face that my children are not his.


And I'd be on my knees every single day thanking God they AREN'T from his polluted gene pool.

Leaving this worthless piece of dog**** is the BEST decision you'll ever make.

The *best*.


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## She'sStillGotIt (Jul 30, 2016)

DEMI6 said:


> Update I'm gone & safe
> 
> He has now called all family members saying his goodbyes & how he wants his funeral planned out.
> He told me he is going to kill himself
> ...


LOL.

Well how methodical of the lazy ass. He can't be bothered to carry a damned plate to the kitchen sink or scrub a toilet or get a friggen job, but he's got ALL this energy to plan his OWN funeral and make all those phone calls. Of course - don't expect him to _*pay *_for his 'impending' funeral because the loser expects every one* else *to carry him in life. Personally, I'd go with a cheap pine box and a burial in the pauper's section of the cemetery but that's only because a dumpster burial is probably illegal.

In the interim, I'd call 911 and tell them he's threatening suicide. They'll hold his pitiful ass in the psyche ward for 72 hours for observation. If he's lucky, maybe they'll give him electro-shock therapy. In either event, it's a 'win' for him because at least he'll get 3 squares a day and a cot since you're not there to wait on him hand and foot.


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

How did things go?


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## DEMI6 (Apr 12, 2017)

Maybe hat him some help

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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

DEMI6 said:


> Maybe hat him some help


???

How are you doing now?


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## TheTruthHurts (Oct 1, 2015)

DEMI6 said:


> Maybe hat him some help
> 
> Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-J320AZ using Tapatalk




We have a lot of hats


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## IamSomebody (Nov 21, 2014)

DEMI6 said:


> Update I'm gone & safe
> 
> He has now called all family members saying his goodbyes & how he wants his funeral planned out.
> He told me he is going to kill himself
> ...


Close your bank account and take out every dime of YOUR money. Do NOT allow him access to any of your funds.

Go to a free consultation with the most shark-like attorney you can find. Find out your rights and responsibilities.

IamSomebody


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