# Husband thinks pot noodles and make a good dinner



## Jill1988 (Jan 25, 2020)

Hello,
I am very worried about my husbands health. He various has health challenges and his go told him to change his diet... but he continues to have a very poor diet (lots of caffeine, often enjoys ramen noodles or even camping food for dinner). He now decided he wants to be a vegetarian because one of his buddies encouraged him.
I do not think that this is a good idea. A vegetarian diet may be beneficial to lots of people but he already has a very poor diet.


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## AandM (Jan 30, 2019)

Jill1988 said:


> Hello,
> I am very worried about


Are you talking about something like this: How to Make Weed Ramen Noodles: Recipe, Instructions & Video - Original Weed Recipes


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## Jill1988 (Jan 25, 2020)

AandM said:


> Are you talking about something like this.


Well, no. Pot noodles is just a kind of Ramen noodles. He is not adding weed to it. Thanks God.


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

Vegetarians research and follow careful diets to make sure they are getting the nutrition they need. It's a lifestyle and does require some discipline and planning. If you think he's sincere and will stick to it for his health, you could try to help him. If he'll actually put in the work and change his lifestyle it sounds better than what he's been doing.


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## Jill1988 (Jan 25, 2020)

@MJJEAN: Unfortunately I think he wants to continue eating as he did - just without meat. Ramen noodles contain no meat, chocolate contains no meat, muffins contain no meat. Do you know what I mean?
When I cook for him he often eats it (even though it’s healthy) but when I am not there and he has to cook for himself....


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## bobert (Nov 22, 2018)

You can't make someone change if they don't want to. Your husband needs to come to that decision on his own. If you do manage to force him, the diet (or any other forced changes) won't last. 

Honestly, it sounds like your husband would eat a BETTER diet if he is vegetarian. Ramen noodles are not vegetarian (the seasoning has animal products) so at least it will cut those out of his diet. I'm guessing camping food has animal products in it as well. 

Have you asked him why he wants to eat vegetarian? 

Why doesn't he eat healthy? Does he know how to cook? Does he choose to eat different meals than what you make?


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## bobert (Nov 22, 2018)

Jill1988 said:


> When I cook for him he often eats it (even though it’s healthy) but when I am not there and he has to cook for himself....


How about cooking meals in advance (meal prep) and freezing them for him? Put it in the microwave, oven, or toaster oven and he has a good, healthy meal. There are TONS of recipes out there and it's not hard to do.


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## Jill1988 (Jan 25, 2020)

@bobert: Yes, he knows to cook. He is actually a good cook but he often doesn’t cook for himself when me and the kids aren’t there... says he is to tired, says he doesn’t know what to cook, says he cannot cook (which is not true I saw him cook). He also says he thinks camping food is healthful (because he believes what the companies selling it claim).

Often he eats what I cook but sometimes he says he cannot eat. May be I should add he has mental health issues (nothing bad, he is not crazy - I don’t want to explain it here) that make him feel to stressed to eat and that he has gut issues. He hopes the get issues will get better if he goes vegetarian. I think they will get better if he stops eating junk. His goal thinks so too.

A lot of pot noodles are vegetarian. Actually he does not want to stop eating every animal product. He just wants to stop sting meat and I think small amounts of meat in a seasoning would be okay for him.


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## Jill1988 (Jan 25, 2020)

bobert said:


> How about cooking meals in advance (meal prep) and freezing them for him? Put it in the microwave, oven, or toaster oven and he has a good, healthy meal. There are TONS of recipes out there and it's not hard to do.


I cook meals in advance and sometimes he eats them but sometimes he has an excuse like he didn’t know exactly which meal from the freezer I wanted him to eat, he couldn’t find it in the fridge and so on.
I have to write him notes. Feel quite exhausted by this.


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## Jill1988 (Jan 25, 2020)

I thinks he hates it when he has to eat alone and loves it when you serve him meals but I/we cannot always eat with him.


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## Cynthia (Jan 31, 2014)

So when he says he's going vegetarian, he only means that he is going to stop eating meat as a main course, but other than that he is going to continue to eat as normal?

He's not a child. You can't dictate what he eats. I understand that it is highly frustrating to see him eat himself into poor health, but you can't stop him if this is what he chooses. My advice is to try to make peace with it and focus on teaching your children good eating habits and making healthy meals that your husband will eat. Having more vegetables in our diets is always good for us, so rather than serving one vegetable with a meal, try vegetable medleys or two separate vegetables. 

If you aren't going to be home, can he eat leftovers? I usually make enough for leftovers, which we eat for lunch and broke young people come to graze my refrigerator. Leftovers are sometimes better the second day, because the flavors have settled in.


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## Jill1988 (Jan 25, 2020)

Cynthia said:


> I understand that it is highly frustrating to see him eat himself into poor health, but you can't stop him if this is what he chooses.


I cannot understand why he chooses this. When we married he was so fit. It is not that he doesn’t care. He is pudgy and he is very unhappy with his weight. Even says he is disgusted by his body. 
Sometimes he eats very healthful for a week or several weeks but then starts eating junk again. I am so worried because he has also prediabetes and we have young children.


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## bobert (Nov 22, 2018)

Well first off, no one with mental health issues is "crazy". I also don't think anyone here would call him crazy if you do talk about it. I certainly wouldn't, nor would I judge you, given that my spouse has a severe mental illness.

You said that he was not like this before, did it start after he was diagnosed with a mental illness? Is it safe to assume that his mental health is playing a large role in his eating habits? Is the illness being managed with medications and/or therapy? If the illness goes untreated it's pretty common for there to be dietary issues as well, whether that's having no energy to cook, no desire to eat, forgetting to eat, paranoia of eating, too much anxiety to eat, etc. Diet is a very important part of treatment, though. It's just as important as medication and therapy, so I understand wanting to get your husband on a better diet for his general well being and mental health as well.

You sound tired. It's not your responsibility to make sure that he is eating, or that he is eating healthy. You can encourage him, you can talk to him, you can give him every opportunity to eat right, but at the end of the day HE needs to make the choice to do it. And I know that it can be hard when mental health is involved, but it really does sound like you are doing everything that you can. I could list off suggestings (like, if he struggles to find the right food, can you label the containers on the side? Like write "Monday - dinner", "Tuesday - dinner", etc on them?) but this doesn't seem to be working for you. Helping your spouse with things like this is NOT bad, as long as you enjoy doing it and don't get stressed out by it. From the sounds of it, you are stressed and it's not working for you. Something has to give.


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## Cynthia (Jan 31, 2014)

Jill1988 said:


> I cannot understand why he chooses this. When we married he was so fit. It is not that he doesn’t care. He is pudgy and he is very unhappy with his weight. Even says he is disgusted by his body.
> Sometimes he eats very healthful for a week or several weeks but then starts eating junk again. I am so worried because he has also prediabetes and we have young children.


I'm sorry you are having this stress in your life. Do you think marriage counseling might help? 

It could have to do with planning. I know I have to plan ahead and be prepared so I eat properly, otherwise I grab something quick that isn't a good choice, because I'm hungry. Maybe he's hungry and waits until he is too hungry to wait. Could that be it? Can you sit down and talk to him about what is causing this, so that he is able to resolve it and have healthier food readily available?

Also: I thought your husband was eating marijuana. lol


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## Jill1988 (Jan 25, 2020)

@bobert Actually he has ptsd and I know (from talking to other with ptsd and from reading about stress hormones such as adrenalin) that it is sometimes difficult to eat when you have ptsd and are stressed. Yet PTSD is not a eating disorder and a lot of people suffering from the disease have balanced diets.
It is being managed with therapy, he is also doing yoga, tai chi and karate, he works out (but not enough to loose weight it seems). He is thinking about TRE. He is actually very disciplined when it comes to other things but not when it comes to his diet.

BTW I am sure that he finds the food in the fridge. He is not an idiot. He just doesn’t want to find it.


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## Jill1988 (Jan 25, 2020)

@Cynthia Pot noodles are actually ramen noodles sold in a plastic pot.
Yes, I talked to him. He felt a little guilty. He said he was trying to eat, he was trying to be the best he could be. He said he just loved that kind of food, that it was easy to prepare and that camping food is actually good for your health. I asked him to discuss this with his gp. He said he would do this later.
He felt a little sad and said he didn’t want to be a burden. I told him it was okay, he was not being a burden.


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## bobert (Nov 22, 2018)

Jill1988 said:


> @bobert Actually he has ptsd and I know (from talking to other with ptsd and from reading about stress hormones such as adrenalin) that it is sometimes difficult to eat when you have ptsd and are stressed. Yet PTSD is not a eating disorder and a lot of people suffering from the disease have balanced diets.
> It is being managed with therapy, he is also doing yoga, tai chi and karate, he works out (but not enough to loose weight it seems). He is thinking about TRE. He is actually very disciplined when it comes to other things but not when it comes to his diet.
> 
> BTW I am sure that he finds the food in the fridge. He is not an idiot. He just doesn’t want to find it.


Some people living with PTSD have well-balanced diets, and some do not. It is a mistake to compare one person and their illness to other people and their illness(es). You are right that PTSD is not an eating disorder, but it is often comorbid with an eating disorder. 

It sounds like he is doing well, aside from his diet. Does his therapist know about his poor eating habits? Would he consider seeing a dietician? They would teach him what is healthy and what is not, what he needs, and will work with his gut issues. 

IF you do most of the shopping, stop buying crappy foods and junk foods. 

You have mentioned his weight at least twice now, so clearly that is something that you want to change.


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## Jill1988 (Jan 25, 2020)

Yes, he is doing well. His ptsd used to be bad but he got much better over the years. He doesn’t want to see a dietician right now. His goal suggested that but he says he doesn’t have the time for that.

Yes, I am not too happy with his weight but he is also unhappy and think that it I disgusting how fat he is. His goal is also unhappy with his Wright and wants him to loose weight.


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

Jill1988 said:


> Yes, I am not too happy with his weight but he is also unhappy and think that it I disgusting how fat he is. His goal is also unhappy with his Wright and wants him to loose weight.


Some people unhappy with their weight spite/comfort eat. 

Is he on any meds for his PTSD? Some meds have wonky side effects that could be affecting his physical cravings.


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

Oopsie'd


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## pastasauce79 (Mar 21, 2018)

I wouldn't discourage him from eating vegetables. It's a very good choice, and a hard decision to make. Healthy habits are hard to achieve after a lifetime of bad eating habits.

My husband grew up very poor. He ate fast food, candy and soda all the time because it was the cheapest food his mom could buy.

We've been married 17 years and he's still working on his eating habits. He hasn't been able to stop drinking soda. He's tried, many times. I don't discourage him. If he tries and fails I just keep encouraging something different. It's a long process. The cravings are hard to beat.

Maybe you both can look at vegetarian recipes to try. Reduce the ramen noodles little by little, maybe try other noodles recipes or try making ramen from scratch. 

What do you mean by camping food? Is it canned food? Beef jerky?


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## TheDudeLebowski (Oct 10, 2017)

I'm sorry, what do you mean by camping food? Like dehydrated meals?

He sounds depressed to me. That would explain having no energy to put forth the effort to do anything but boil water essentially. Boil water, add noodles. Boil water, add it to dehydrated food package. 

You know, you could get your own food dehydrator. Make large pots of food and instead of leftovers you just dehydrate the rest of it. Then he can grab what you made, add his boiled water and go. Obviously this isn't fixing the root of the issue, but it can be a temporary work around that might make you feel better about this until you fix what is causing the issue here. He might also get involved with the meal prep and get inspired, who knows. I guarantee you making your own "camping food" is better than store bought by a wide margin. Its also way cheaper.


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## Taxman (Dec 21, 2016)

Jill
You are talking to the deposed king of junk food and poor diet. You are also very very right that he is heading for disaster. There are very few people out there that can stand several decades of poor diet. I was one of them. I never really learned to eat right. My parents both had obesity problems. I was the fat dumb guy who thought it was macho to eat an entire pizza by myself. Ramen for breakfast lunch and dinner? Sure. AND I did know how to cook. So, by the age of 40, I was no longer doing football practice at 4 til 6 every day. I was sitting in one place for the most part of eight hours. I was smoking a few packs a day. So, one fine Sunday morning about a month and a half after my 40th birthday, I wake up to the elephant sitting on my chest. I had no feeling in my right arm. I had a numbing tingling sensation in my right neck. I said to my wife, "I think I am having a heart attack." That was my first. I had a second, five years later. It was the widow-maker. It put me into a coma for the better part of a week. I was diagnosed with diabetes. The medication added weight. I was a mess. Plain fact, I was gonna die. I hit 330 lbs. I was expecting my 3rd heart attack. I got with a good internist. I had my daughter, a med school student at the time go thru my medicine cabinet. We rejigged all of my meds AND I JOINED WEIGHT WATCHERS. Last decade or so, I have s-l-o-w-l-y lost the weight. I go to the gym, three times a week. I cook. Rarely do I go out and indulge in a hamburger. Let me tell you after the last decade or so, it had better be a five star burger and fresh cut fries. My wife and I are in one of the best places we have been in 42 years of marriage. We look good for people in their mid sixties, and we act like we are in our 20s. He has to want to do this. Fear is a great motivator. I never again wanted to deal with hospitals, doctors, and the rest of the nonsense bad health will bring on you.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Jill1988 said:


> Hello,
> I am very worried about my husbands health. He various has health challenges and his go told him to change his diet... but he continues to have a very poor diet (lots of caffeine, often enjoys ramen noodles or even camping food for dinner). He now decided he wants to be a vegetarian because one of his buddies encouraged him.
> I do not think that this is a good idea. A vegetarian diet may be beneficial to lots of people but he already has a very poor diet.


Ne needs cheese for protein, if he becomes a vegetarian.


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## brooklynAnn (Jun 29, 2015)

My husband quit smoking about a year and a half. He used icecream as a substitute. A few months ago the doctor told him be was borderline diabetic and gave him metformin. He came home and we went on a low carb diet immediately. No rice, bread or flour, pasta etc...just quinoa, cauliflower rice, hemp hearts, lots of salads, veggies and hg fruits.

He is back to normal now. Its takes about 3 months for things to start changing. He got a new treadmill and is running again. 

What I noticed is that I have to be on board and leading in order for him to follow. So, I empty the pantry of all the crap he likes and repacked it with all wholesome things. Got him to see an endocrinologist. 

I also, am learning alot about cooking for keto diet and using those recipes.

I know alot of people will say, he is an adult and should be in control of his health. I find if I cook the healthy stuff, he will eat it. Sometimes, you have to push them. And if your husband is receptive he will change.

However, if you have one of those who is too stubborn then there is nothing you can do. He will just have to learn his own lesson. There is only so much leading you can do.

But if he changes his diet then nothing is impossible. His over all life will only improve for the better. Good luck.


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## brooklynAnn (Jun 29, 2015)

Adding to my previous post. A vegetarian diet if done correctly will improve a lot of things for him. But ramen noodles is not the best thing. He should get educated on what to eat first and start out small. 

By the way I saw some awesome ramen cooking on YouTube. You can add meat and veggies, Anything to the pot to make it health but get the good kind. And all that salt is so bad.


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## Taxman (Dec 21, 2016)

brooklynAnn said:


> My husband quit smoking about a year and a half. He used icecream as a substitute. A few months ago the doctor told him be was borderline diabetic and gave him metformin. He came home and we went on a low carb diet immediately. No rice, bread or flour, pasta etc...just quinoa, cauliflower rice, hemp hearts, lots of salads, veggies and hg fruits.
> 
> He is back to normal now. Its takes about 3 months for things to start changing. He got a new treadmill and is running again.
> 
> ...


In a two or more person household, the better intentions lead the way. In my case my wife was an experienced weight watcher, she got me with the program, showed me the ropes. Learned how to substitute for healthier choices. Learned to eat three meals a day. (You would be surprised how many obese people skip meals). Cut soda out, and replaced it with water, and more water. Learned what to eat and when to eat it.


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## SpinyNorman (Jan 24, 2018)

MattMatt said:


> Ne needs cheese for protein, if he becomes a vegetarian.


There are other sources of protein for vegetarians, and even for vegans.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

SpinyNorman said:


> There are other sources of protein for vegetarians, and even for vegans.


True. Even some vegan cheese substitutes are available.


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## notmyrealname4 (Apr 9, 2014)

@Jill1988

Is part of the reason you are scared about this, is that you are scared that your husband will die and you will be left alone. Struggling in every way; especially financially?


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## SpinyNorman (Jan 24, 2018)

MattMatt said:


> True. Even some vegan cheese substitutes are available.


Also beans, and meat substitutes like Beyond Meat and Impossible meat.


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