# Boyfriend and female friends



## Maria (Apr 26, 2009)

Hi, I would really like to get some perspective on this issue that bothers me. 

My partner thinks I'm jealous and overly worried but I feel his behaviour is not open and straightforward

Here are some examples 

When he was married previously (he is divorced 3 years) he and his wife were friendly with another couple and he told me in the past he often used to chat on-line with the woman. I know she used to be a stripper and he has told me she is bisexual sex made woman. When I heard this a few month s after we met I was glad they had fallen out and he was not in contact with them. She made contact with hin on my birthday in January via facebook and he accepted the friend request. He then emailed her and back and forth via facebook. He hid from me that she was planning to come to the UK and wanted to meet with him (this came out in an argument about another woman and online chat)...I was really upset and he told me I was out of order and paranoid ..he never suggesgted we both meet her ..he says because I had already looked down on her because she used to be a stripper. Turns out she is not coming to the UK so nothing further has happened and I've noticed on her facebook page her photo has changed to one with a man beside her so that may explain. 

I also have seen recently an unknown woman post on his facebook wall "sorry I had to rush off last night, thanks for the nice chat!" I asked him who she was and he told me he did not know but had added her through some networkign group. I asked why she had put an ! at the end and he got mad and called me paranoid and he said he had no idea why...and that she had chatted online to him about pryamid selling. He told me he would remove her but never did...today I see she has posted on his wall saying "I like your new profile pic" .....I feel I can't say anything as he will tell me he is not responbile for what women post on his page and call me paranoid again. 

He also has a load of other online female friends from a school reunion group he set up recently. When they had a reunion that he arranged he arranged it without partners on a sat night so I never met any of them. I see them posting each other on his facebook page although usually I cannot see what he says back. 

He also belongs to a message board through a group of people he met on holiday and again some of these women are on his facebook page and he chats on-line with them., 

All my good friends he has met and funnily enough has added as friends on his facebook whereas most of these online people I feel really excluded from and all his school people he has never introduced me to. 

What do others think. We have been together 18 months and were planning to move in together a few months ago although he pulled out with some excuse and basically I have this sense although he says differently that he is not 100% and this is one of his ways in his own of keeping an independent life and friends albeit most of them online separate. 

Please excuse spelling errors it has been a long day at work. 
Maria


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