# Snooped on wife's phone, found Kik account, threesomes



## sputnik101 (Dec 14, 2017)

Deleted as I want to move on. This forum doesn't allow you to delete posts apparently.


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## Bananapeel (May 4, 2015)

Divorce her. There's nothing else to say here.


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## Primrose (Mar 4, 2015)

sputnik101 said:


> In general I don't like the way my body looks and I have issues about the size of my penis. *I don't think I could go through with a threesome if it was on the table, but I also don't think I could handle it if she was f***ing a bunch of other guys.*


Why does it have to be one or the other? You are well within your rights to demand monogamy and fidelity from your wife. She is not entitled to explore her curiosity of other men, while married to a man who is not keen on opening his marriage, just because she has a fantasy. 

Can you do any digging on these men she messaged? I doubt she will outright admit to any physical cheating without any proof thrown in her face, so your best bet may be in contacting these men. 

Otherwise, the fact that she was even TRYING to arrange an affair should be the focus here. She was actively looking for one, and this isn't the first time. Can you live with this?


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

OK, you know what is going on. Its not completely clear if she went through with it, but likely she has done some things. 

Now its your choice. Many people would divorce over this, and that is a completely reasonable approach. 

You could decide you are OK with an open marriage, but it sounds like you aren't - and most people are not.

You already gave her a chance and she did it again. I don't think that there is any reason to expect that she will stop in the future, so base your decision on that


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

She clearly isn't interested in being a faithful wife. Do you want to be married to a cheater who has no idea of what faithfulness means?


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## ABHale (Jan 3, 2016)

Print off what you found a confront her with divorce papers. 

Talk with a lawyer and get everything ready for a divorce. Then give her the print out of what you found with the divorce papers. 

Go from there.


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## VermiciousKnid (Nov 14, 2017)

Should you confront? Are you really asking this question?


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## Steve2.0 (Dec 11, 2017)

Even if she didn't go through with it, it seems like she is on the verge... sending nudes, setting up dates, etc... that would be enough to loose trust in her for any future trips/vacations for me at least.


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## Lostinthought61 (Nov 5, 2013)

It sounds like you have some self esteem issues but that has nothing to do with the fact that your wife cheating...whether she went through with it or not there was intent, she was looking for sex outside the marriage and may have done so...she dis respected you and the marriage and you are asking if you should confront...first of all please say you forward or snapped a picture of this for proof and secondly HELL YES YOU CONFRONT...stop being a freaking doormat and grow a pair....i don't car if you look like Alfred E. Newman no one serves this...talk to a lawyer and you expose this to everyone.


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## Broken_in_Brooklyn (Feb 21, 2013)

Print out the chats and pics and include with divorce papers. Send her a bill fora full STD suite test. Do you have kids? Check their DNA, make sure they are yours. Send her the bill for that too.


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## barbados (Aug 30, 2012)

DIVORCE !!!

Hopefully you don't have kids, but either way, DIVORCE !!!


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## Steve1000 (Nov 25, 2013)

sputnik101 said:


> I borrowed my wife's phone to watch a video I don't have on my phone, and found a Kik account.
> 
> I knew I shouldn't have done it but curiosity got the better of me and I opened up the Kik app.


Your wife has been sending nude pics to other men and you're apologetic for opening a Kik account on her phone? One should never feel sorry for discovering that their spouse is cheating on them. Why are you so timid around your wife?


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## Marc878 (Aug 26, 2015)

Being a doormat will just get you more of the same.


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## Bonkers (Nov 26, 2017)

If this is a real story then I suggest..

Never mind


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## sputnik101 (Dec 14, 2017)

Deleted


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## Betrayedone (Jan 1, 2014)

Don't you guys read the original post before spouting off? The guy says no kids......


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## Rhubarb (Dec 1, 2017)

sputnik101 said:


> Hi all,
> but I also don't think I could handle it if she was f***ing a bunch of other guys.


You don't THINK you could handle it? So then you might be able to.....I'm always socked at the number of guys who try to couch the seriousness of their situation. You should make a choice. You are either going to be a ****/doormat or you aren't. Alternatively you could go in for an open marriage but that would destroy you if you are anything like me.


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## BobSimmons (Mar 2, 2013)

sputnik101 said:


> - 20 years of a relationship is a lot to throw away.


If she gives you the gift of sexual disease I'm sure you'll consider being with her for 20 years worth it...


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## Malaise (Aug 8, 2012)

sputnik101 said:


> In the confrontation she admitted setting up the threesome and that she got as far as meeting one guy "but the other guy didn't turn up".
> 
> So what did she do with the 'one guy' ?
> 
> ...


She has no problem with doing so.


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

Being that you have now told us that you have also cheated, twice, and not told her, then you are just as bad. If you want the whole truth from her, then do the right thing and tell her what you have done as well. Very hypocritical to claim shock and hurt when you cheated twice yourself.


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## chillymorn69 (Jun 27, 2016)

Not worth saving this relationship.

How could you ever TRUST her again. She will blow smoke up your ass and say anything she thinks you want to hear.

Divorce , does she work ? Split everything 50/50.

This is the 2nd time you caught her.


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