# What is he thinking?



## momof2bellas (Jun 27, 2011)

Ok. I'm gonna try and get all the points across so I can get the most accurate answers. I met this guy at school, where both of our daughters go last year, and we hit if off. Talked every day but that was it. This year we continued to talk and I was telling him about my open marriage with my husband. That was said because I told him he took someone else out for Valentines day so as when anyone finds that out, they are a little confused. So he was trying to set me up with a friend of his but I just found seeing a friend of his weird so I said no but I have always had this huge crush on him. Well one day about 3 weeks ago he asked me to send him a request in words with friends and we would chat on there, where they got more and more intimate. We eventually started seeing each other not long after we started talking ad he would tell me how he doesnt really care to play the game, he just uses it as a way to talk to me. Last Thursday I sent him a dirty picture via text message and on Saturday (the worst part of it is) his wife seen in on their account under his cell phone. Appearntly, she checks on his once a week. So we were able to make her think it was a mass text from a friend of his by having one of my friends call her and talk to her etc. Well ever since then, he has been playing the game with me but he doesnt chat. This Friday, she called my cell phone again and I just happened to be with my friend who answered it and she talked to him and hung up. So I guess that confirmed to her that it was a guys phone, not a girl. So again, hes continuing to play the game but no chat so this morning I asked what are you doing on there and he said he was at the gym, and what was I doing. I told him but he hasnt said anything back. I see him at school and he talks as if things are normal so that no one thinks anything and when he sees me out running, he normally honks or pulls over but he hasnt since. Any idea what he is thinking? Should I move on? Is it weird for me to message him on the game and ask if he is ok and what is up with us? I know its not the best situation but I just need some type of closure. I dont know if he is trying to get it time to make sure his wife doesnt think anything, I mean is he playing the game and restarting games. Help me.


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## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

you may have an open marriage, he clearly doesn't

I'd back way off if I were you


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## Coffee Amore (Dec 15, 2011)

Let him go. 

You want to be the other woman in someone else's marriage?

If you have an open marriage that's your business, but don't go trying to "open up" someone else's marriage. From the sounds of it, this man isn't in an open relationship. He's dishonest too. You should look for singles or others in an honest, open marriage.


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

You're helping this guy destroy his marriage. I suspect the point of telling him about your open marriage had much to do with the fact that you've always had a crush on him. He used to be apparently an honest, faithful, husband and now he's a cheat and a liar. I give it a few more days and he'll also be an adulterer. You play a game. He's risking his whole life.


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## momof2bellas (Jun 27, 2011)

Well I totally understand. I will say that he is a cronic cheater on her, from what hes told me. He did say he stopped about 3 years ago which is why she continues to check up on his cell phone all the time. I can see why she is like that because she has been cheater on multiple times by him. I didnt tell him that for any other reason other than he asked what we did on vday and I just told him he took a girl out and then I had to tell him. Thank you, I do feel I need to let him go I just need to figure out how to get closure for myself.


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## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

you have to be aware of boundaries - relationships like yours are pretty rare you know


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## onehotmama (Apr 13, 2012)

I would say leave the guy alone definitely. And why do you feel the need to get closure? You're married..Just let it go
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## momof2bellas (Jun 27, 2011)

onehotmama said:


> I would say leave the guy alone definitely. And why do you feel the need to get closure? You're married..Just let it go
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I guess for me since Im in an open marriage, I just need it. I did talk to him yesterday so I actually feel a lot better. I was mainly looking for what could be going on in his mind as to why he wasn't talking at all except at school, we talked as normal.


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## COguy (Dec 1, 2011)

momof2bellas said:


> I guess for me since Im in an open marriage, I just need it. I did talk to him yesterday so I actually feel a lot better. I was mainly looking for what could be going on in his mind as to why he wasn't talking at all except at school, we talked as normal.


Maybe he's trying to do the right thing and not disrespect his wife and ruin his marriage and life and kid's lives. Sounds like you are doing your best to undo that.

Stop being so selfish and let this poor guy try to do the right thing. At least do it for his poor wife. If anything, you should tell her that he's still cheating around so she can move on and find a real man.


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## Chelle D (Nov 30, 2011)

I agree.. He does not have an open marriage. IF you've really been in an open marriage for so long.. you'd know to recognize the signs of people that are NOT in open marriage.

Geesh... Are you really that ignorant of how a regular marriage works? or are you just selfish & didn't care what this would do to this guy's marriage?


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## mrsamazing (Feb 9, 2012)

why dont you ask his wife what hes thinking? Your behavior sucks lady. Do whatever you want jn your own marraige, but dont be the enemy to someone elses
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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