# I Want To Make My Marriage Work



## unsatisfiedwife (Oct 18, 2009)

me and my husband have only been married about 7 months but i feel things are slowly going down hill for us. there are alot of things that we both need to work on but im having trouble wanting to change my ways because of our past. my husband frequently calls me a *****, which really hurts me. not because im not but because this is the person i chose to live my life with and im having his child i would think by now he has accepted me as me. i will admit i am a bit outspoken and sometimes i can be a little mean. not alot of people really see the bad side of me bu once you do you'll know that im not the person to mess with. but i have accepted that truth about me and the most important people in my life so i thought have too. but thats not it, i may be really mean at times but sometimes he is a complete butthole. he has done things to me in the past and ive stayed with him through it all. i love my husband but i dont really think i like him much lately. he does alot for me. he cooks for me he does alot of the cleaning and when i ask for something he tries to get it. but i view all of those things as catering to me. lately he has been asking me every night to do something for him like scratch his back play with his arms caress his chest and stomach and when i refuse he brings up all he does for me like this should be the payment. but i view everything he wants as pleasure needs. now i would be fine with doing all the things he asked if i was getting an equal amount of pleasure needs fulfilled but facts are im not. i am 7 months pregnant and getting hornier every day but i can count the times a month we are intimate on my hands. i have needs and he is not meeting them but he wants back rubs every night i dont find this fair at all and when i dont do whatever it is he asks he throws a big fit and its such a big deal. i also think i am a little resentful because recently he told me its not that he doesnt want to have sex as much as i do anymore its that he doesnt want to have sex with me. because im so mean. now you get an example of hat a butthole he is ofrst off im pregnant so of course im a little extra at times but im also very sensive and if i wouldve said that to him he would have not talked to me and been mad for a very long time. please help me i dont know what it is i can do to get us to a place where everything is ok. but im tired and i dont want to fight anymore. i am about to bring a life into this world and im ready to let go of the littl things


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## denverconnect (Mar 4, 2011)

Is this your first rodeo? We, married folk, have so many expectations from the marriage. This includes thinking that things should be the way they were when we first met. Re-creating the original experience is impossible. However, it is the true beauty of marriage experience when we create new experiences together - experiences that are not compared in contrast to the 'original' experience. Name calling is horrible, it cuts to the core. I name call when I've been hurt and cannot communicate my feelings......


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## Jamison (Feb 10, 2011)

To tell you the truth it sounds like its time for you to both grow up. Name calling and being mean are choices. You can change your behavior, and he can change his. If both of you choose not to, then I guess this is how your life will be. Even for your child.


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