# Blended family, not sure which direction to take



## jbaby (Sep 23, 2013)

I have been with my husband a total of almost 6 years and 2 of those have been formally married. We are a blended family, he has kids from previous and I have kids from previous but none together. My kids live with us full time and one of his does as well. His child that is with us has several behavior issues that I have been well aware of since the beginning. There has always been a power struggle between us two(meaning me and his child). I have been physically attacked several times while trying to discipline this child. I feel that so much focus goes to that one child that mine are put on the back burner at times. I want to get back to my being happy in our relationship. I dont feel emotionally or physically connected to my husband, for like the past 2-3 months. I want us to get back to where we were but unsure of how to do this. Recently a verbal altercation happened between my husband and my childs father. I just honestly want to give up on everything and have it be me and my kids. I would honestly be happy with that but I feel like im giving up and i dont want to do that. there has been so much we have overcomed as a couple but im just to the point that i feel we would be better off seperated. What to do?


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## survivorwife (May 15, 2012)

jbaby said:


> I have been with my husband a total of almost 6 years and 2 of those have been formally married. We are a blended family, he has kids from previous and I have kids from previous but none together. My kids live with us full time and one of his does as well. His child that is with us has several behavior issues that I have been well aware of since the beginning. There has always been a power struggle between us two(meaning me and his child). *I have been physically attacked several times while trying to discipline this child.* I feel that so much focus goes to that one child that mine are put on the back burner at times. I want to get back to my being happy in our relationship. I dont feel emotionally or physically connected to my husband, for like the past 2-3 months. I want us to get back to where we were but unsure of how to do this. Recently a verbal altercation happened between my husband and my childs father. I just honestly want to give up on everything and have it be me and my kids. I would honestly be happy with that but I feel like im giving up and i dont want to do that. there has been so much we have overcomed as a couple but im just to the point that i feel we would be better off seperated. What to do?


I highlighted the part that really concerned me. What happened and how did your husband respond? You see, that right there could put a significant strain on any marriage. If that was not addressed at the time it happened, then I can see why your future with this "blended family" might not be so rosy.

From what you wrote, you and your children are fine together. Was there any justification in regards to the verbal altercation between your husband and your children's father? Or does your husband have anger-management issues? And does this reflect onto his biological child?

You see, both parents of all the children need to display a united front as one unit. If your husband seems to be favoring his own bio-child to the point of allowing the child to disrespect you, that is a failure of your husband as a parent and will only escalate in the future if not addressed.


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