# What to do, what to do?



## mj531 (Aug 7, 2012)

Hi all,

Thanks for taking time to read my post. I won't bore you with a bunch of details so I will try to keep this as short and simple as possible. 

I got married to my wife in early 2011. In December of 2010, my wife and sister in law got into a fight which caused my brother and sister in law to drop out of the wedding. Keep in mind my brother was my best man. We have not spoke or seen them since, which is somewhat OK with me because my sister in law is a complete you know what. After this happenned, my parents deservingly so did not deal with the situation all that well considering my family is very mellow and has never dealt with a lot of drama. Being new to the family, my wife felt like my parents blamed her for what happenned. My parents did make a few comments to her about what she could have done differently but they also said the same things to my sister in law. Nothing so out of line that has caused this dilemma. I think between both of my parents there were a total of 2 comments made that were not bad at all.

The wedding went on and things were great for a few months and my wife starts piping up saying my parents never reach out to her, makes random statements that my sister in law has drug her name in the mud (assumption on her part) and now my whole family hates her, my parents like the sister in law better (assumptions again), etc. Do my parents see and talk to the other side of the family more? Yes. That is due to my brother having two kids and me having 0 and myself and my wife living 3 hours away from them while my brother lives 20 minutes away from. This bothered my wife and I approached my parents about this. My mom mentioned that she agreed but at the same time communication works both ways and my wife never reaches out to her which I honestly don't disagree with. After speaking with my parents about this I thought all of this would be solved but my wife did not like what I had to say and has been putting me through hell ever since this happenned (about 3 months ago). She told me when my parents come to town she will leave, when I go to see my parents I'll have to go by myself and even has got to the point that I'm suppossed to tell my wife everytime I talk to my parents because she is so paranoid that my parents are going to bad mouth her, which is a complete delusion on my wife's part. These demands made us argue to no end and we ended up going to a therapist which helped tremendously. Or so I thought.

Between sessions I found out my mother has breast cancer. The therapist broke through to my wife telling her to just move past this and reach out to my mom during this time which would obviously make my wife and mom so much closer. My wife agreed and said she would email her in a few days to bury the hatchet. This was about 2 1/2 weeks ago. Well, my mom is going through surgery tomorrow and I asked my wife yesterday if she had emailed my mom and she said no, and she was not going to. Her rationale was "I have been walked all over my whole life and just because your mom has cancer I'm not just going to give her a free pass". One word for that is "WOW'. I really couldn't believe she had the audacity to even say that. On top of that she said she will just leave so I can have my family back which she has been saying for close to a year now. Not only is she not supporting my mom, but she is not even supporting her husband!!! A few more notes to consider. She has made rude, disparaging, vulgar remarks about my parents and towards me during all this drama. I've actually left the house twice overnight the verbal abuse was so bad. Any ideas, thoughts as to what is wrong with her and what I should do would be much appreciated. Divorce at this point is a consideration. Also, I said this was going to be short and simple but I guess that didn't happen. Sorry! Thanks for your support!


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## survivorwife (May 15, 2012)

Can I call your wife a self-centered little brat? 

WOW! No compassion at all for you, your Mom or anyone other than herself?

I would suggest that you go visit your Mom alone then. Leave her home to stew in her bad temper. Your wife can be replaced. Your mother cannot be replaced.

And I hope your Mom gets better. As for the wife, do you really want to have children with this woman?


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## CantePe (Oct 5, 2011)

I'd call her bluff and say "leave, there's the door. Either you are with me or against me. I'm not getting involved in your drama anymore, deal with it or don't - your choice"

I don't do drama anymore in my life - can you tell.


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