# Golden Corral First Date



## AVR1962

So here is the situation.....a guy asks you to dinner, you agree and you tell him to pick the place and you tell him you can be there at ____ time. He texts you with the address for Golden Corral. After laughing hysterically and standing there is total bewilderment, what do you do? Go ahead with plans? What kind of a guy chooses Golden Corral for a first date?


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## Lila

I think this might be one where you counter the golden corral offer with a coffee shop. Just my 2 cents. 

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## Popcorn2015

Is he a widower?


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## Kivlor

AVR1962 said:


> So here is the situation.....a guy asks you to dinner, you agree and you tell him to pick the place and you tell him you can be there at ____ time. He texts you with the address for Golden Corral. After laughing hysterically and standing there is total bewilderment, what do you do? Go ahead with plans? What kind of a guy chooses Golden Corral for a first date?


Well... in my area...










ETA: 

aaaaaand


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## AVR1962

Popcorn2015 said:


> Is he a widower?


no


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## AVR1962

Kivlor said:


> Well... in my area...


Aw, the humor!!!!


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## Pressed4Time

AVR1962 said:


> So here is the situation.....a guy asks you to dinner, you agree and you tell him to pick the place and you tell him you can be there at ____ time. He texts you with the address for Golden Corral. After laughing hysterically and standing there is total bewilderment, what do you do? Go ahead with plans? What kind of a guy chooses Golden Corral for a first date?


Were you looking for somewhere more expensive, or? A date is a date, it's about spending time together to get to know one another. 

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## Kivlor

Okay, now that I got that out of my system... I second @Lila's advice.


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## Lostinthought61

Big spender....even money tells you he wants to go Dutch once your there.


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## GuyInColorado

I'd send back: "LOL, no thanks. I hate buffets"

How old is this guy?


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## ne9907

awww ... don't know this guy out. Go with him. 

Once a guy took me to taco bell ........ was all he could afford


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## She'sStillGotIt

LOL...I can't help it - I love buffets even though the food usually sucks out loud.

Hubby and I (at my suggestion) spent our first Thanksgiving together at the truck stop buffet because our family was all going away that year and we really didn't have anywhere to go.

We put on our work boots and flannel shirts and headed out 20 miles to the state border where the TA is (Truckstops of America) and had the buffet for dinner.

It's STILL one of my favorite Thanksgiving memories. :grin2:


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## MSalmoides

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## SimplyAmorous

Something like this would not bother me ...... I can think of far more things that would cross a man out over this.. .. I am not a higher class woman who needs whined & dined at a fancy steakhouse or whatever.. sure it would be nice.. but It wouldn't stop me from wanting to meet someone -if it seemed we had enough in common.... I'd give him the time.. and we'd get to know each other.. 

I feel like @She'sStillGotIt - I really enjoy buffets.. the kids love them too.. but true.. the food isn't always the best, but there is enough variety with some really good dishes to make up for it... we are bummed that one of our family favorites closed this past year.. lots of memories there..


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## zookeeper

Might have been a test. If so, your reaction was likely quite illuminating.


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## AVR1962

GuyInColorado said:


> I'd send back: "LOL, no thanks. I hate buffets"
> 
> How old is this guy?


Not real sure how old he is. I would say around my age. I am in my 50's. Can't recall the last time I ate at Golden Corral. I think the only reason we we was becasue we had 5 kids at home and they had discount rates for children. Boy, that takes me back a few years!!


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## AVR1962

ne9907 said:


> awww ... don't know this guy out. Go with him.
> 
> Once a guy took me to taco bell ........ was all he could afford


Did you go on a second date?


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## MSalmoides

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## heartsbeating

AVR1962 said:


> So here is the situation.....a guy asks you to dinner, you agree and you tell him to pick the place and you tell him you can be there at ____ time. He texts you with the address for Golden Corral. After laughing hysterically and standing there is total bewilderment, what do you do? Go ahead with plans? What kind of a guy chooses Golden Corral for a first date?


Is it humor / a wind-up?

You said to pick a place... he did... I say roll with it and at the very least, know it will be memorable!


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## Blondilocks

I much prefer to be wined and dined at a fancy steakhouse or whatever.


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## Lostme

I would leave out the LOL part if you decline, just tell him thank you but buffet's are not my thing and maybe suggest a different place.


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## AVR1962

SimplyAmorous said:


> Something like this would not bother me ...... I can think of far more things that would cross a man out over this.. .. I am not a higher class woman who needs whined & dined at a fancy steakhouse or whatever.. sure it would be nice.. but It wouldn't stop me from wanting to meet someone -if it seemed we had enough in common.... I'd give him the time.. and we'd get to know each other..
> 
> I feel like @She'sStillGotIt - I really enjoy buffets.. the kids love them too.. but true.. the food isn't always the best, but there is enough variety with some really good dishes to make up for it... we are bummed that one of our family favorites closed this past year.. lots of memories there..


And I don't like buffets. It's not about the food, I get that but I think it says something about this guy. If he is a buffet type, he's not my type of guy. He's already told me he is trying to lose weight and eat healthier and then invites me to a buffet....hum? Maybe he was hoping I would cancel, lol!!!! Something is off here....we were supposed to go out tomorrow night then he text me to tell me that Sunday would be better for him because he has something on his calendar he forgot about and then he asked about tonight. I do not get an all-over good feeling about any of this.


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## AVR1962

heartsbeating said:


> Is it humor / a wind-up?
> 
> You said to pick a place... he did... I say roll with it and at the very least, know it will be memorable!


It's almost like eating my own words, isn't it?? Yikes!!! I guess I have learned a lesson.


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## AVR1962

Blondilocks said:


> I much prefer to be wined and dined at a fancy steakhouse or whatever.


I was thinking more like Greek or Indian food!!!! But steak and wine would be good too. I couldn't remember if they served alcohol at Golden Corral so I looked it up and they do not.


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## Blondilocks

Guess he couldn't find a hot dog cart in the area. Yeah, if buffets aren't your thing, then suggest a Denny's (one step up).


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## GuyInColorado

For our entertainment purposes, you now must go on the date to GC and report back on how it went.


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## AVR1962

Blondilocks said:


> Guess he couldn't find a hot dog cart in the area. Yeah, if buffets aren't your thing, then suggest a Denny's (one step up).


You guys are cracking me up!!!!!


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## AVR1962

GuyInColorado said:


> For our entertainment purposes, you now must go on the date to GC and report back on how it went.


I actually just cancelled. I could not follow thru. He is probably in the shower, getting ready.I feel bad but I cannot bring myself to go to Golden Corral.


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## Lila

@AVR1962, my baby sister is single. She has dating 'rules', 2 of which come to mind reading your op.

Her first one is never, ever agree to a sit down meal for a first date. Steer towards coffee or after work drink, 30 minute max at which point you can make a quick exit if it's not looking too good. 

Her second is your first couple of dates set the precedent for the relationship. Do not agree to something that you wouldn't accept under 'normal' circumstances. Don't force compatibility. 

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## MSalmoides

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## Blondilocks

AVR1962 said:


> I actually just cancelled. I could not follow thru. *He is probably in the shower*, getting ready.I feel bad but I cannot bring myself to go to Golden Corral.


Nah, he's digging through the hamper trying to find the least smelly shirt.


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## MSalmoides

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## SimplyAmorous

MSalmoides said:


> SA I get what you're saying. If he's a good guy then not a dealbreaker. I haven't been in the dating scene for years so what do I know?
> 
> I was just thinking about the first date with my wife. We went to a movie house that served pizza and beer at your table, but hey I was 19 and it was walking distance from the campus. If I were to ask a first date today, I have no clue what I'd do so I guess I don't have anything to add LOL.
> 
> ~MS
> 
> Edited to add: Drinking age was 18 in those days.


Our 1st date was eating meatballs at his house.. we were very young too.. I've never drank.. so drinks have no appeal to me... I've been on another thread here that went on & on & on about if a man used a dang coupon on a 1st date.. personally my own husband wouldn't do that (I asked him) but still this would not be something where I felt .. he's a loser.. he's an idiot.. I would see it as a "conversation piece" about money... I don't see that as such a bad thing on a date... 

Lately I am beginning to feel I just don't belong on this forum.. it seems everyone is high class... can't relate to most people here.. I'd rather go to a nice Chinese buffet... This probably sounds pathetic too...only a loser would suggest that.. 

Actually I feel a decent man who really LIKED A WOMAN, wanted to impress...he should ask HER where she wants to go....this has always been what my husband has done.. but Me.. I rarely suggest something expensive.. but now & then we do splurge.. yes. 

I was out today...Golden Corral came up in a conversation by another couple...how they go there...I didn't know they had one in that town...here I was just telling them.. "OH we need to go there!".. ironic.. 

I must be hugely deprived or something.. I am very happy to go to these dives ....We go to Red Lobster once or twice a year at the most.. that's my favorite.. I wait till we have coupons.. for us.. that is luxury eating out.. but we do have a pretty large family...I don't think we've ever taken them all with us (yet).


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## heartsbeating

AVR1962 said:


> I actually just cancelled. I could not follow thru. He is probably in the shower, getting ready.I feel bad but I cannot bring myself to go to Golden Corral.


Did you tell him why you were cancelling?


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## heartsbeating

SimplyAmorous said:


> Our 1st date was eating meatballs at his house.. we were very young too.. I've never drank.. so drinks have no appeal to me... I've been on another thread here that went on & on & on about if a man used a dang coupon on a 1st date.. personally my own husband wouldn't do that (I asked him) but still this would not be something where I felt .. he's a loser.. he's an idiot.. I would see it as a "conversation piece" about money... I don't see that as such a bad thing on a date...
> 
> Lately I am beginning to feel I just don't belong on this forum.. it seems everyone is high class... can't relate to most people here.. I'd rather go to a nice Chinese buffet... This probably sounds pathetic too...only a loser would suggest that..
> 
> Actually I feel a decent man who really LIKED A WOMAN, wanted to impress...he should ask HER where she wants to go....this has always been what my husband has done.. but Me.. I rarely suggest something expensive.. but now & then we do splurge.. yes.
> 
> I was out today...Golden Corral came up in a conversation by another couple...how they go there...I didn't know they had one in that town...here I was just telling them.. "OH we need to go there!".. ironic..
> 
> I must be hugely deprived or something.. I am very happy to go to these dives ....We go to Red Lobster once or twice a year at the most.. that's my favorite.. I wait till we have coupons.. for us.. that is luxury eating out.. but we do have a pretty large family...I don't think we've ever taken them all with us (yet).


Each to their own, SA.

I'm not a fan of buffets either. I would have a certain expectation for a first date but wouldn't necessarily mean high-end restaurants. I like a certain level of eateries yet I actually don't like fine-dining. We're all different. It's not necessarily about being high class or otherwise. 

Sometimes however the unexpected moments can become the most cherished. A few years ago my husband took me to an outdoor bar. Nothing fancy, just good music. No food served, the only place to sit was on shipping pallets. We went to a nearby Thai restaurant for take-out dishes, went back to the bar, perched on pallets, ate sharing from the tubs. Of all the great eateries and restaurants we have visited, that moment remains one of my fondest.


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## MSalmoides

SimplyAmorous said:


> Our 1st date was eating meatballs at his house.. we were very young too.. I've never drank.. so drinks have no appeal to me... I've been on another thread here that went on & on & on about if a man used a dang coupon on a 1st date.. personally my own husband wouldn't do that (I asked him) but still this would not be something where I felt .. he's a loser.. he's an idiot.. I would see it as a "conversation piece" about money... I don't see that as such a bad thing on a date...
> 
> Lately I am beginning to feel I just don't belong on this forum.. it seems everyone is high class... can't relate to most people here.. I'd rather go to a nice Chinese buffet... This probably sounds pathetic too...only a loser would suggest that..
> 
> Actually I feel a decent man who really LIKED A WOMAN, wanted to impress...he should ask HER where she wants to go....this has always been what my husband has done.. but Me.. I rarely suggest something expensive.. but now & then we do splurge.. yes.
> 
> I was out today...Golden Corral came up in a conversation by another couple...how they go there...I didn't know they had one in that town...here I was just telling them.. "OH we need to go there!".. ironic..
> 
> I must be hugely deprived or something.. I am very happy to go to these dives ....We go to Red Lobster once or twice a year at the most.. that's my favorite.. I wait till we have coupons.. for us.. that is luxury eating out.. but we do have a pretty large family...I don't think we've ever taken them all with us yet.


I don't see it as being high class. We eat out on the cheap all of the time. It's just Golden Corral. I cannot stand loud crowds and ours is always crowded and noisy. That is what would make it an awkward first date for me.

After thinking about it, I would choose a place based on the atmosphere of it. A place we could talk without all the noise. 

Red Lobster is a favorite! Dem biscuits ma!

~MS


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## SunCMars

Date must be a Golden Ager.

The coffee is good there!

He picked this place because that is his style and his comfort zone.

I agree it is a little....understated.....and tacky for many of the high class snobs here at TAM.

I guess I am one of them.

This would not be a deal breaker [date breaker] for me, but I would not give him two bites at the apple.

He sounds modest, unassuming, oblivious to protocol. He sounds harmless.

Where you live, that might be your road to recovery. Have fun, have an extra order of that pudding.


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## MSalmoides

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## Blondilocks

SA, your insecurities are showing and it doesn't become you. You are too good of a person to be daunted by bucks.

All we are saying, is that Golden Corral is inappropriate for a first date because it doesn't lend itself to learning about a person. A place with a more quiet atmosphere would help in that regard. Also, there's less chance of Montezuma's Revenge visiting at a later hour which would surely sour that experience in AVR's eyes.


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## sokillme

SimplyAmorous said:


> Something like this would not bother me ...... I can think of far more things that would cross a man out over this.. .. I am not a higher class woman who needs whined & dined at a fancy steakhouse or whatever.. sure it would be nice.. but It wouldn't stop me from wanting to meet someone -if it seemed we had enough in common.... I'd give him the time.. and we'd get to know each other..
> 
> I feel like @She'sStillGotIt - I really enjoy buffets.. the kids love them too.. but true.. the food isn't always the best, but there is enough variety with some really good dishes to make up for it... we are bummed that one of our family favorites closed this past year.. lots of memories there..


When you read your post it is understandable that you have had a good marriage. I hope your husband takes you to the stake house every once in a while though because you sound like a keeper.


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## SimplyAmorous

The jokes being made about it.. I guess it just rubs me the wrong way.. and yes.. many would think that is a dive restaurant... Yes to each their own.. We don't eat out much.. so to us.. all of them is something we'd enjoy.. 

Last year, I think it was.. I asked 4th son what he wanted to do on his birthday.. his answer: Go to the Golden Corral..


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## Andy1001

MSalmoides said:


> I don't see it as being high class. We eat out on the cheap all of the time. It's just Golden Corral. I cannot stand loud crowds and ours is always crowded and noisy. That is what would make it an awkward first date for me.
> 
> After thinking about it, I would choose a place based on the atmosphere of it. A place we could talk without all the noise.
> 
> Red Lobster is a favorite! Dem biscuits ma!
> 
> ~MS


My girlfriends birthday is in march and earlier this year I booked a table in a real upmarket restaurant on Easter Sunday.Just as we were going in the fire alarm went off and the place was cleared.Everywhere else was booked out and we ended up in Burger King.


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## MSalmoides

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## heartsbeating

SimplyAmorous said:


> Actually I feel a decent man who really LIKED A WOMAN, wanted to impress...he should ask HER where she wants to go....this has always been what my husband has done..


I'd agree with this for dating etiquette... asking what type of eatery / cuisine she likes... then arrange a place they're both likely to enjoy. My husband does this too.


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## sokillme

SimplyAmorous said:


> Our 1st date was eating meatballs at his house.. we were very young too.. I've never drank.. so drinks have no appeal to me... I've been on another thread here that went on & on & on about if a man used a dang coupon on a 1st date.. personally my own husband wouldn't do that (I asked him) but still this would not be something where I felt .. he's a loser.. he's an idiot.. I would see it as a "conversation piece" about money... I don't see that as such a bad thing on a date...
> 
> Lately I am beginning to feel I just don't belong on this forum.. it seems everyone is high class... can't relate to most people here.. I'd rather go to a nice Chinese buffet... This probably sounds pathetic too...only a loser would suggest that..
> 
> Actually I feel a decent man who really LIKED A WOMAN, wanted to impress...he should ask HER where she wants to go....this has always been what my husband has done.. but Me.. I rarely suggest something expensive.. but now & then we do splurge.. yes.
> 
> I was out today...Golden Corral came up in a conversation by another couple...how they go there...I didn't know they had one in that town...here I was just telling them.. "OH we need to go there!".. ironic..
> 
> I must be hugely deprived or something.. I am very happy to go to these dives ....We go to Red Lobster once or twice a year at the most.. that's my favorite.. I wait till we have coupons.. for us.. that is luxury eating out.. but we do have a pretty large family...I don't think we've ever taken them all with us (yet).


I have eaten at Windows on the World when it was there, Bar Americain (awesome by the way), and I have eaten at waffle house. I liked them all. In the end if the food is decent and the company is good who cares.


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## Lila

MSalmoides said:


> *I don't see it as being high class. *We eat out on the cheap all of the time. It's just Golden Corral. I cannot stand loud crowds and ours is always crowded and noisy. That is what would make it an awkward first date for me.
> 
> After thinking about it, *I would choose a place based on the atmosphere of it.* A place we could talk without all the noise.



I completely agree that this is not about eating cheap. My first date with my husband was to the Carnival - food truck dining at it's best. We had an awesome time and he definitely made a great first impression. We were young and broke but I think even today at 42 (and not broke), this type of date would still appeal to me.


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## SimplyAmorous

Lila said:


> I completely agree that this is not about eating cheap. My first date with my husband was to the Carnival - food truck dining at it's best. We had an awesome time and he definitely made a great first impression. We were young and broke but I think even today at 42 (and not broke), this type of date would still appeal to me.


Ok..I can see this.. *the atmosphere* is what it's about.. his mistake was not INSISTING she choose... that's proper etiquette when a man really digs a woman..


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## SimplyAmorous

Blondilocks said:


> SA, your insecurities are showing and it doesn't become you. You are too good of a person to be daunted by bucks.
> 
> All we are saying, is that Golden Corral is inappropriate for a first date because it doesn't lend itself to learning about a person. A place with a more quiet atmosphere would help in that regard. Also, there's less chance of Montezuma's Revenge visiting at a later hour which would surely sour that experience in AVR's eyes.


I had to google Montezuma's revenge = that's pretty dang sick ... as for insecurities.. not sure what to say.. I have them as much as the next person.. I am not even sure what you mean by being daunted by bucks ? Can you explain this a little.. and I'll try to asses myself.


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## tropicalbeachiwish

Oh man, I would have gone! Curiosity would have driven me. Make humor out of it! Next time, you pick and do something like White Castle! Lighten up. 

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## kag123

SimplyAmorous said:


> Our 1st date was eating meatballs at his house.. we were very young too.. I've never drank.. so drinks have no appeal to me... I've been on another thread here that went on & on & on about if a man used a dang coupon on a 1st date.. personally my own husband wouldn't do that (I asked him) but still this would not be something where I felt .. he's a loser.. he's an idiot.. I would see it as a "conversation piece" about money... I don't see that as such a bad thing on a date...
> 
> Lately I am beginning to feel I just don't belong on this forum.. it seems everyone is high class... can't relate to most people here.. I'd rather go to a nice Chinese buffet... This probably sounds pathetic too...only a loser would suggest that..
> 
> Actually I feel a decent man who really LIKED A WOMAN, wanted to impress...he should ask HER where she wants to go....this has always been what my husband has done.. but Me.. I rarely suggest something expensive.. but now & then we do splurge.. yes.
> 
> I was out today...Golden Corral came up in a conversation by another couple...how they go there...I didn't know they had one in that town...here I was just telling them.. "OH we need to go there!".. ironic..
> 
> I must be hugely deprived or something.. I am very happy to go to these dives ....We go to Red Lobster once or twice a year at the most.. that's my favorite.. I wait till we have coupons.. for us.. that is luxury eating out.. but we do have a pretty large family...I don't think we've ever taken them all with us (yet).


Don't feel like you don't belong here (I sometimes feel that way too)! I love your posts and I think it's great to have someone real like you to read from. 

My family was one of those wanna be high class types and I have always hated it. My husband however grew up 180 degrees differently and your story of saving the coupons for red lobster once a year - that's them. And as soon as I met him and met his family I LOVED them. So down to earth, no trying to keep up with anybody, such a breath of fresh air! I have sat with my MIL and heard some of HER stories of how she grew up, and I am absolutely in awe of her resourcefulness and ability to be happy with the simple things in life. I strive to be like her.  

My husbands background is actually one of the reasons I love him. He's a hard worker and knows how to make something out of nothing and be happy with what he's got.


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## MrsAldi

My first official date with my husband was at McDonald's! 

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## MSalmoides

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## MSalmoides

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## AVR1962

Lila said:


> @AVR1962, my baby sister is single. She has dating 'rules', 2 of which come to mind reading your op.
> 
> Her first one is never, ever agree to a sit down meal for a first date. Steer towards coffee or after work drink, 30 minute max at which point you can make a quick exit if it's not looking too good.
> 
> Her second is your first couple of dates set the precedent for the relationship. Do not agree to something that you wouldn't accept under 'normal' circumstances. Don't force compatibility.
> 
> Sent from my SCH-I545 using Tapatalk


Good advise! I will keep that in mind!!


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## AVR1962

MrsAldi said:


> My first official date with my husband was at McDonald's!
> 
> Sent from my B1-730HD using Tapatalk


I don't know if my first husband and I ever had official dates but we were sure regulars at McDonalds....of course we were still in high school!!!!


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## AVR1962

tropicalbeachiwish said:


> Oh man, I would have gone! Curiosity would have driven me. Make humor out of it! Next time, you pick and do something like White Castle! Lighten up.
> 
> Sent from my SM-G930V using Tapatalk


Ha ha ha....love it.....White Castle!!!


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## AVR1962

Blondilocks said:


> Nah, he's digging through the hamper trying to find the least smelly shirt.


Thanks for the laugh!!!!!!


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## AVR1962

heartsbeating said:


> Did you tell him why you were cancelling?


Told him I was exhausted. Asked for a raincheck. Will make sure it is meeting over a drink of some sort so I can exit quickly if need be.


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## AVR1962

MSalmoides said:


> You could always show up with a walker to fit in with the crowd. Make sure someone gets the pic when he sees you.
> 
> ~MS


Good visual!!


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## john117

SimplyAmorous said:


> The jokes being made about it.. I guess it just rubs me the wrong way.. and yes.. many would think that is a dive restaurant... Yes to each their own.. We don't eat out much.. so to us.. all of them is something we'd enjoy..
> 
> Last year, I think it was.. I asked 4th son what he wanted to do on his birthday.. his answer: Go to the Golden Corral..


Please google images for Golden Corral memes...

Buffets are not necessarily evil. We love Sunday buffets offered by established non chain restaurants... Best way to try lots of things. But not GC type places...

There's a Chinese place here where the Sunday only buffet is frequented by nearly all Asian customers. The food is the real thing, and is exceptionally good.

Sent from my Moto G (4) using Tapatalk


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## SimplyAmorous

kag123 said:


> Don't feel like you don't belong here (I sometimes feel that way too)! I love your posts and I think it's great to have someone real like you to read from.
> 
> My family was one of those wanna be high class types and I have always hated it. My husband however grew up 180 degrees differently and your story of saving the coupons for red lobster once a year - that's them. And as soon as I met him and met his family I LOVED them. So down to earth, no trying to keep up with anybody, such a breath of fresh air! I have sat with my MIL and heard some of HER stories of how she grew up, and I am absolutely in awe of her resourcefulness and ability to be happy with the simple things in life. I strive to be like her.
> 
> My husbands background is actually one of the reasons I love him. He's a hard worker and knows how to make something out of nothing and be happy with what he's got.


Thank you for sharing this @kag123 ... Yeah we're pretty down to earth... the simple things -we still find many silver lining moments.. 

I just got done having a conversation with our 2 sons in college to NEVER NEVER be so stupid as to take a new date to the Golden Corral, telling them about this thread.... one wanted to come on here as a troll... (Oh he won't)... we had a great laugh over this...but in their mind.. they were beating it to death that they SHOULD ask the woman -joking of course...


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## MSalmoides

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## kag123

So my two cents on the original question. 

First, I would have peed myself laughing that someone suggested golden corral for a FIRST date. Only because the atmosphere...good lord haha. I hate going there with my family because it's rowdy, and any buffet is just terrible for a "date". You're all getting up and down at different times and end up not really spending any time sitting down together or talking! 

Those golden corral dinner rolls though. I LOVE these things. I could eat a thousand of them. I've tried and tried to make them at home using different copycat recipes and nope. No luck. So my response to the date request would probably be - let me make sure I bring my big purse so I can shove it full of dinner rolls while we are there.  

Honestly though, the last time we were at a GC, one of the (many) unattended small children at the buffet stuck their arm elbow deep into the chocolate fountain. The manager had to turn it off and clean the entire thing out. I'm left wondering how many hands go into the chocolate fountain that aren't noticed by management. Icky. :X


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## SimplyAmorous

MSalmoides said:


> Question. If a guy does this, is there a risk that he would be seen as indecisive and beta? Not the take charge type? Just throwing it out there.
> 
> My wife asked ME out first and she already had a plan!
> 
> ~MS


Well.. ya know what.. my husband is what I call "tipped BETA".. and I love him the way he is.. (he could push the bar in the bedroom some.. this really is my only complaint)... I don't see BETA as pizz poor as many others do... being newer here ....you've probably never came across this old thread of mine...where I explored the various definitions on it...

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/genera...ns-beta-male-good-all-p-whipped-pathetic.html 

I am actually the more dominant/ assertive partner between us (isn't it true, opposites attract)... . though when Guy meets girl... I believe the man should make the 1st move to pursue, to show his interest and intent... I am "old fashioned" like that.. that's what I wanted.. . ...I am happy to say.. he came after me.. asking me to be his girl very quickly - (within a week of us meeting even), take into account he was on the shy side, gave up on girls-was dumped twice before me...figured I would shoot him down... but still he put himself out there.. that's assertive enough.. he wanted me ! Then he cared to please me.. what else does a girl need.


----------



## becareful2

You never know, there are guys who are loaded but some like to test their date to see their reaction. Are they stuck up, are some eateries beneath them, etc. I would go with mismatched socks and an ugly sweater just to see how she reacts.:rofl:


----------



## MSalmoides

...


----------



## arbitrator

Blondilocks said:


> Guess he couldn't find a hot dog cart in the area. Yeah, if buffets aren't your thing, then suggest a Denny's (one step up).


*Or perhaps your local Waffle House ~ This "heartclogger" is definitely one big step back!*


----------



## MrsHolland

No idea what this place is but imagining cheap and nasty. Would be a deal breaker for me, life is too short to go to cheap and nasty food places.


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## As'laDain

... i used to actually take girls to places like golden corral and then to a lame poetry lounge, just to confuse the **** out of them. 

i usually did such things with the pretty stuck up girls. i remember one instance where i did this after i found out that a girl had heard about how i treated my last date. i took the last date out to a rodeo, followed by hibachi and a movie. stuck up preppy girl had just gotten dumped and wanted her hibachi... 

or so i thought to myself. she probably just wanted a pick me up after a blow to the ego. 

ill never forget my buddy laughing his ass off when he found out where i took her. toward the end of the night, she asked me why i didnt take her out to fun and exciting places like i did the other girl. i basically told her that she wasnt worth the money it cost to do so, since she was stuck up, inconsiderate, stupid, and only worth the image she portrayed by my side. she was eye candy, nothing more. strangely enough, she kinda stalked me for a little while after that...

yeah, i was a ****. 

then again, that particular girl had once told my buddy that she was out of my league. she didnt like not getting the same positive treatment as the social outcast girls i dated.


----------



## notmyrealname4

AVR1962 if you have a bad feeling about being asked to Golden Corral, then honor that feeling. It felt wrong to you; for whatever reason.

Is this way below your income level?

Does the disconnect between his stated fitness goals; but the places he chooses to eat, raise a red flag?

Based on your history with your ex: are you very wary of being used; or treated cheaply. You know what I mean. Does an alarm go off in your head, that "here I am, getting the short end of the stick again"? [This is what I think is happening, fwiw]


You asked for feedback on our preferences. If they had a good salad----I'd eat there.

But the buffet style of restaurant does not appeal to me. I know that people stick their fingers in that stuff, or otherwise "sample" the food. And I'm sure things like nostril hair, etc. end up in those pans of food. I don't care if there are shields over the top of the food; public buffets have an undesirable squick factor for me, personally.


I'll go ahead and be completely honest: it wasn't right to cancel on the day of the date. Maybe I'm misunderstanding and that isn't what happened. But how would you feel if someone did that to you?

I think you should be single for 6 months before dating; consider the hell that you have recently escaped from. You should decompress for a while.

But this was a funny thread, eitherway.


----------



## As'laDain

notmyrealname4 said:


> AVR1962 if you have a bad feeling about being asked to Golden Corral, then honor that feeling. It felt wrong to you; for whatever reason.
> 
> Is this way below your income level?
> 
> Does the disconnect between his stated fitness goals; but the places he chooses to eat, raise a red flag?
> 
> Based on your history with your ex: are you very wary of being used; or treated cheaply. You know what I mean. Does an alarm go off in your head, that "here I am, getting the short end of the stick again"? [This is what I think is happening, fwiw]
> 
> 
> You asked for feedback on our preferences. If they had a good salad----I'd eat there.
> 
> But the buffet style of restaurant does not appeal to me. I know that people stick their fingers in that stuff, or otherwise "sample" the food. And I'm sure things like nostril hair, etc. end up in those pans of food. I don't care if there are shields over the top of the food; public buffets have an undesirable squick factor for me, personally.
> 
> 
> I'll go ahead and be completely honest: it wasn't right to cancel on the day of the date. Maybe I'm misunderstanding and that isn't what happened. But how would you feel if someone did that to you?
> 
> I think you should be single for 6 months before dating; consider the hell that you have recently escaped from. You should decompress for a while.
> 
> But this was a funny thread, eitherway.


yeah, i have to admit, if someone cancelled on me as i was getting ready for the date, i would probably not give them another chance unless they scheduled another date. and that is a big if.

i dated a girl once that had never been to a highschool dance because she was home schooled. it was my senior year and the girl wanted to go to a higschool dance at least once. so, i took her shopping and let her pick out a dress and jewelry for it. i paid for all of it since she had no money. 
well, her mother didnt like me for some reason and she decided to cancel on me. but, she waited until i called her to let her know i was on my way to pick her up to tell me that she had decided to do some odd job for her uncle instead. we had been planning it for two months.

so i told her to keep the dress and jewelry and promptly dumped her. its not like i wanted sex from her. i was still a virgin. 

i just really dont like to be stood up like that. she kept trying to apologize and whatnot, wanted another chance. cried a lot. 

oh well.


----------



## MrsHolland

As'laDain said:


> ... i used to actually take girls to places like golden corral and then to a lame poetry lounge, just to confuse the **** out of them.
> 
> i usually did such things with the pretty stuck up girls. i remember one instance where i did this after i found out that a girl had heard about how i treated my last date. i took the last date out to a rodeo, followed by hibachi and a movie. stuck up preppy girl had just gotten dumped and wanted her hibachi...
> 
> or so i thought to myself. she probably just wanted a pick me up after a blow to the ego.
> 
> ill never forget my buddy laughing his ass off when he found out where i took her. toward the end of the night, she asked me why i didnt take her out to fun and exciting places like i did the other girl. i basically told her that she wasnt worth the money it cost to do so, since she was stuck up, inconsiderate, stupid, and only worth the image she portrayed by my side. she was eye candy, nothing more. strangely enough, she kinda stalked me for a little while after that...
> 
> yeah, i was a ****.
> 
> then again, that particular girl had once told my buddy that she was out of my league. she didnt like not getting the same positive treatment as the social outcast girls i dated.


You must be so proud of yourself. Ugh, what hideous behaviour.


----------



## notmyrealname4

As'laDain said:


> well, her mother didnt like me for some reason and she decided to cancel on me. but, she waited until i called her to let her know i was on my way to pick her up to tell me that she had decided to do some odd job for her uncle instead. we had been planning it for two months.
> 
> so i told her to keep the dress and jewelry and promptly dumped her. its not like i wanted sex from her. i was still a virgin.
> 
> i just really dont like to be stood up like that. she kept trying to apologize and whatnot, wanted another chance. cried a lot.


"Homeschool" suggests "religious" to me; though I know that's not always the case.

Kids raised by super religious/strict parents DO what they are told.

There's a good chance that she really wanted to go with you; but wasn't allowed to at the last minute.

If that makes you feel better; so many years after the fact.:wink2:


----------



## Satya

SimplyAmorous said:


> The jokes being made about it.. I guess it just rubs me the wrong way.. and yes.. many would think that is a dive restaurant... Yes to each their own.. We don't eat out much.. so to us.. all of them is something we'd enjoy..
> 
> Last year, I think it was.. I asked 4th son what he wanted to do on his birthday.. his answer: Go to the Golden Corral..


I didn't even know what it was so had to Google it. Many of my first dates were in coffee shops, like local places or maybe Starbucks. Maybe a little more conducive to conversation than a buffet? 

Was it not an option to suggest an alternative place before going one strike and you're out?


Eta, oops! I saw your post about the followup after I responded. 

My first date was at a local restaurant that Odo and I now go to every year on the same day we met.


----------



## As'laDain

MrsHolland said:


> You must be so proud of yourself. Ugh, what hideous behaviour.


Proud? Not really. 

Yea, I agree, it was hideous.


----------



## As'laDain

notmyrealname4 said:


> "Homeschool" suggests "religious" to me; though I know that's not always the case.
> 
> Kids raised by super religious/strict parents DO what they are told.
> 
> There's a good chance that she really wanted to go with you; but wasn't allowed to at the last minute.
> 
> If that makes you feel better; so many years after the fact.:wink2:


I'm sure that was the case. If it happened today, I would probably give her a second chance. 

I was a very different person back then.


----------



## arbitrator

*Cheap and nasty eateries/restaurants are certainly OK, given these conditions:

(1) If it's a known or accepted fact that neither date participant has an abundance of available funds! Like back when we were in college or grad school!

(2) As long as both openly agree to the location!

(3) It is imperative that the food has to have a reputation for being good, and the background noise level level acceptable for conversation!

(4) If at all possible, it should be a nice place, but shouldn't be someplace that under normal conditions, that one simply cannot afford to go to! That, in and off itself, can lead toward some potentially embarrassing situations!

(5) Unless it is meant as a total surprise, the date should always know what restaurant it is that they are going to!

(6) Always have enough cash or credit card reserves available to pay for the date, or if by prior arrangements, the parties have agreed in advance to just "go Dutch!"

(7) If driving your date, know where to pick them up at, and for God's sake, have a good clean workable vehicle to take them there in ~ otherwise, just plan on meeting them there!

(8) The goal of the first date is always to extract enough mutual interest to see if there is a joint desire in pursuing date number two!*


----------



## tropicalbeachiwish

heartsbeating said:


> Sometimes however the unexpected moments can become the most cherished. A few years ago my husband took me to an outdoor bar. Nothing fancy, just good music. No food served, the only place to sit was on shipping pallets. We went to a nearby Thai restaurant for take-out dishes, went back to the bar, perched on pallets, ate sharing from the tubs. Of all the great eateries and restaurants we have visited, that moment remains one of my fondest.


Sign me up! That sounds so interesting!


----------



## Celes

Yeah it would be a deal breaker for me OP. I wouldn't bother rescheduling. There's plenty in between fancy steakhouse and tacky buffet for a first date.


----------



## AVR1962

becareful2 said:


> You never know, there are guys who are loaded but some like to test their date to see their reaction. Are they stuck up, are some eateries beneath them, etc. I would go with mismatched socks and an ugly sweater just to see how she reacts.:rofl:


There are guys that have money and are absolutely stingy, married one. Not doing that again!


----------



## AVR1962

kag123 said:


> So my two cents on the original question.
> 
> First, I would have peed myself laughing that someone suggested golden corral for a FIRST date. Only because the atmosphere...good lord haha. I hate going there with my family because it's rowdy, and any buffet is just terrible for a "date". You're all getting up and down at different times and end up not really spending any time sitting down together or talking!
> 
> Those golden corral dinner rolls though. I LOVE these things. I could eat a thousand of them. I've tried and tried to make them at home using different copycat recipes and nope. No luck. So my response to the date request would probably be - let me make sure I bring my big purse so I can shove it full of dinner rolls while we are there.
> 
> Honestly though, the last time we were at a GC, one of the (many) unattended small children at the buffet stuck their arm elbow deep into the chocolate fountain. The manager had to turn it off and clean the entire thing out. I'm left wondering how many hands go into the chocolate fountain that aren't noticed by management. Icky. :X


It's been years since I was last at a Golden Corral and my memory was it being loud, busy and germy with hands and fingers everywhere, food being coughed on. I don't recall the food being good. No atmosphere. My ex was a buffet person and he looked it.


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## Evinrude58

MY thoughts:

A woman who is overly concerned about the eating location and not about meeting and spending time with me for a first date, wouldn't be worth my time. There is nothing wrong with Golden Corral food, other than being a "buffet" for spoiled Americans to complain about and thumb their noses at. Anywhere else on the planet, Golden Corral would be a FEAST.
All this whining about it's not this or that, it's noisy, etc.---- Well one can eat, get a look at the person, get a feel for their level of sanity, and then go elsewhere to talk if they're still interested. Neither party is out 60-100 bucks for a fancy meal, purchased for a woman that may or may not be interesting at all.

I've taken a lady to Golden Corral--- not a first date. We had a great time, were able to talk just as well as in any other place--- seems like they're all pretty noisy. I'm not wealthy, and have no time for a woman that places my value on how much money I spend on her meal.
Either way you spin it, worrying about which restaurant one goes to on a first date is just snobbiness.

Yes, I agree that it's not the best choice---- but not so bad as to make a fuss over.


----------



## AVR1962

SimplyAmorous said:


> Well.. ya know what.. my husband is what I call "tipped BETA".. and I love him the way he is.. (he could push the bar in the bedroom some.. this really is my only complaint)... I don't see BETA as pizz poor as many others do... being newer here ....you've probably never came across this old thread of mine...where I explored the various definitions on it...
> 
> http://talkaboutmarriage.com/genera...ns-beta-male-good-all-p-whipped-pathetic.html
> 
> I am actually the more dominant/ assertive partner between us (isn't it true, opposites attract)... . though when Guy meets girl... I believe the man should make the 1st move to pursue, to show his interest and intent... I am "old fashioned" like that.. that's what I wanted.. . ...I am happy to say.. he came after me.. asking me to be his girl very quickly - (within a week of us meeting even), take into account he was on the shy side, gave up on girls-was dumped twice before me...figured I would shoot him down... but still he put himself out there.. that's assertive enough.. he wanted me ! Then he cared to please me.. what else does a girl need.


I agree. I was the pursuer of my ex and it seemed I was always trying to get him into the relationship so I will not do it. Golden Corral invitation tells me either he is a buffet person, has no money/or is tight with money, has no sense of what is nice and never will, or it is close to his house and it is convenient to him. None of which are the mentality to entertain or care to spend time with.

So single men, I hope you are reading!!!!! Don't ask a first date to Golden Corral!!!!!!


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## Lila

AVR1962 said:


> So single men, I hope you are reading!!!!! Don't ask a first date to Golden Corral!!!!!!


I disagree with this line of thinking and I'll tell you why. As we've seen on this thread, some people like Golden Corral (buffets) and others don't. I think this is something that speaks to lifestyle likes/dislikes. If you happen to be a Golden Corral type of guy, wouldn't you want to find someone who is also a Golden Corral type of gal? 

Dating is about determining compatibility. If one is disingenuous, then they are wasting your and their time. Be glad that your potential date brought his like for CG. It saved you time in the long run. 

Sent from my SCH-I545 using Tapatalk


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## KJ_Simmons

AVR1962 said:


> What kind of a guy chooses Golden Corral for a first date?


A down to earth guy who isn't big on creating a certain fascade with his new date. I like him already.

I will say though, that as much as I love buffets, they make me feel like a beach ball afterward and I may or may not have to hit the crapper shortly after. That part, may not be ideal for an early date. :|

@Evinrude58 - I wish I could like your post twice!


----------



## Blondilocks

SimplyAmorous said:


> I had to google Montezuma's revenge = that's pretty dang sick ... as for insecurities.. not sure what to say.. I have them as much as the next person.. I am not even sure what you mean by being daunted by bucks ? Can you explain this a little.. and I'll try to asses myself.


Your statement that you are not a high class person because you enjoy buffets. One time you and your husband wanted to try a hotel but felt your car wasn't good enough for the parking lot. It seems people who are wealthier than you make you feel less than; at least, that is the impression you leave. 

Neither money nor its ability to pay for higher priced restaurants, hotels, cars etc. confers 'class'.


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## Yag-Kosha

People can often surprise you and I have been often wrong about people so I try to reserve judgement until I get to know someone. I don't like buffets either but they aren't all that common here in Canada. The last time I was at one, at least a decade ago, the cake they had tasted like a rubber tire. 

That said, I would probably meet someone in front of a barn if that was the location of the date. I am kinda strange.

And this thread reminds me of this scene:


----------



## Emerging Buddhist

AVR1962 said:


> So single men, I hope you are reading!!!!! Don't ask a first date to Golden Corral!!!!!!


I think I'd also tell you I signed you up for the "Good as Gold Club" and tell you I'm telling them it's your birthday so I could get you a free meal while driving you through the the GC parking lot on the way to our real destination... just to share (warn?) my sense of humor.

Naw, I guess I wouldn't tease like that on the first date... but if one came, most definitely the second. :wink2:


----------



## prunus

AVR1962 said:


> So here is the situation.....a guy asks you to dinner, you agree and you tell him to pick the place and you tell him you can be there at ____ time. He texts you with the address for Golden Corral. After laughing hysterically and standing there is total bewilderment, what do you do? Go ahead with plans? What kind of a guy chooses Golden Corral for a first date?


I'll start by saying I've only read this post and I despise Golden Corral. But, you did tell him to pick the place and that you'd be there. So, yes, you go ahead with the plans. Or, perhaps you spare him all together and cancel and never contact him again. Going into the date with that attitude doesn't sound good for that guy since you're so judgemental. Maybe he really likes the place, even though you think it's hilarious. If you didn't really want him to pick the place, then you shouldn't have said that.


----------



## Evinrude58

kag123 said:


> Don't feel like you don't belong here (I sometimes feel that way too)! I love your posts and I think it's great to have someone real like you to read from.
> 
> My family was one of those wanna be high class types and I have always hated it. My husband however grew up 180 degrees differently and your story of saving the coupons for red lobster once a year - that's them. And as soon as I met him and met his family I LOVED them. So down to earth, no trying to keep up with anybody, such a breath of fresh air! I have sat with my MIL and heard some of HER stories of how she grew up, and I am absolutely in awe of her resourcefulness and ability to be happy with the simple things in life. I strive to be like her.
> 
> My husbands background is actually one of the reasons I love him. He's a hard worker and knows how to make something out of nothing and be happy with what he's got.


If I had to pick a date with any of the female posters here and they were all single, just based on what and how they write,
it would be with Kag123 and Simplyamorous. 
They wouldn't last long on the dating scene--- someone would swipe them up FAST. Hopefully my sons will find women who think like you.
:allhail:


----------



## prunus

AVR1962 said:


> I was thinking more like Greek or Indian food!!!! But steak and wine would be good too. I couldn't remember if they served alcohol at Golden Corral so I looked it up and they do not.


Then you should have said that. He's not a mind reader.


----------



## Kivlor

Lila said:


> I disagree with this line of thinking and I'll tell you why. As we've seen on this thread, some people like Golden Corral (buffets) and others don't. I think this is something that speaks to lifestyle likes/dislikes. If you happen to be a Golden Corral type of guy, wouldn't you want to find someone who is also a Golden Corral type of gal?
> 
> Dating is about determining compatibility. If one is disingenuous, then they are wasting your and their time. Be glad that your potential date brought his like for CG. It saved you time in the long run.
> 
> Sent from my SCH-I545 using Tapatalk


I agree with this very strongly. Don't waste your time putting up a facade, and trying to wine and dine someone, if that's not how you are normally. The mask will slip eventually.

Personally, I'm cheap. Super cheap. So Golden Corral would be out for me as a first date. It's coffee, or a beer at a quiet bar, or something equally relaxed, low-key and low-price. That way we can both excuse ourselves if it's not going well / we're not interested, and money doesn't even play into the situation.


----------



## Celes

prunus said:


> Then you should have said that. He's not a mind reader.


He's the one who asked her to dinner. IMO, whoever asks for the date should plan the date. I always hated when guys would ask me out then ask me where I wanted to go.

He came up with something lame. AVR realized they were not compatible. She called off the date. No harm no foul. She got to find out early and spare both parties the effort. She's done nothing wrong here. She doesn't owe this guy anything just because she agreed to a date.


----------



## Celes

Kivlor said:


> I agree with this very strongly. Don't waste your time putting up a facade, and trying to wine and dine someone, if that's not how you are normally. The mask will slip eventually.
> 
> Personally, I'm cheap. Super cheap. So Golden Corral would be out for me as a first date. It's coffee, or a beer at a quiet bar, or something equally relaxed, low-key and low-price. That way we can both excuse ourselves if it's not going well / we're not interested, and money doesn't even play into the situation.


I think coffee is perfect for a first date. I'd also go Dutch.


----------



## prunus

notmyrealname4 said:


> "Homeschool" suggests "religious" to me; though I know that's not always the case.
> 
> Kids raised by super religious/strict parents DO what they are told.
> 
> There's a good chance that she really wanted to go with you; but wasn't allowed to at the last minute.
> 
> If that makes you feel better; so many years after the fact.:wink2:


No, home school is not always religious. Not at all.


----------



## 3Xnocharm

GC's in my area are so awful, my friend's police officer husband works "guard duty" there after hours!


----------



## Mr. Nail

Well it has been my experience with my long term partner of 3 decades that when she says "you choose the place", She will quickly reject my first three proposals. She's lucky I hate buffets. We usually end up eating at the one place she had in mind but for some unfathomable reason was unwilling to mention.


----------



## Evinrude58

Celes said:


> He's the one who asked her to dinner. IMO, whoever asks for the date should plan the date. I always hated when guys would ask me out then ask me where I wanted to go.
> 
> He came up with something lame. AVR realized they were not compatible. She called off the date. No harm no foul. She got to find out early and spare both parties the effort. She's done nothing wrong here. She doesn't owe this guy anything just because she agreed to a date.


I agree and disagree. She agreed to a date. After accepting, the choice of restaurants is not up to her level of status, so she's declining. Who does that? I'm sure there's a lot of people that do and AVR is not unique. I just never thought that was such an important factor.
There's a thousand reasons that were legitimate that he could have asked her there vs. a nicer place. 

I agree that AVR and this prospective date 99% likely wouldn't be compatible, but calling off a date is a big deal to me. I think she should have had a stronger reason.


----------



## prunus

Mr. Nail said:


> Well it has been my experience with my long term partner of 3 decades that when she says "you choose the place", She will quickly reject my first three proposals. She's lucky I hate buffets. We usually end up eating at the one place she had in mind but for some unfathomable reason was unwilling to mention.


My STBXH always did that to me. I couldn't stand it. Or, in the rare occasion that he accepted my choice, he would later complain about it.


----------



## Mr The Other

zookeeper said:


> Might have been a test. If so, your reaction was likely quite illuminating.


As a man who has been reasonably poor (certainly by US standards), there are several things wrong with the suggestion:

- It has a reputation for being cheap and nasty. 
This is the one you leapt for. However, it would be a terrible test, as there are many other things wrong with it.

- It is not personal, it is good to take her to a place that either one of them particularly wants to see. If there is a story about what this Golden Corral means to him, then he should have shared the sweet story.

- It is a meal on a first date. Too much too soon. You should always give the lady a chance to escape easily, meet for coffee then go to the next place. And it is cheaper.

- It is not intimate. If she has a dog, walking the dog together is a great first date. Walking anywhere is pretty good, being side by side allows you to be closer than if you are facing. And it is cheaper.

- It suggests that he cannot cook. Cooking is a fairly basic life skill and if he cannot cook for himself, it is something he has to make up for.


----------



## Mr The Other

Kivlor said:


> I agree with this very strongly. Don't waste your time putting up a facade, and trying to wine and dine someone, if that's not how you are normally. The mask will slip eventually.
> 
> Personally, I'm cheap. Super cheap. So Golden Corral would be out for me as a first date. It's coffee, or a beer at a quiet bar, or something equally relaxed, low-key and low-price. That way we can both excuse ourselves if it's not going well / we're not interested, and money doesn't even play into the situation.


Exactly. I am reasonably well off, but would not spring for a meal first off unless it was a particular place I was longing to go to while I was in the area.


----------



## Blondilocks

Dating as a teenager or twenties or thirties is entirely different than dating in your fifties. The older you are, the less time you have left so why waste it? She did them both a favor.


----------



## Celes

Evinrude58 said:


> I agree and disagree. She agreed to a date. After accepting, the choice of restaurants is not up to her level of status, so she's declining. Who does that? I'm sure there's a lot of people that do and AVR is not unique. I just never thought that was such an important factor.
> There's a thousand reasons that were legitimate that he could have asked her there vs. a nicer place.
> 
> I agree that AVR and this prospective date 99% likely wouldn't be compatible, but calling off a date is a big deal to me. I think she should have had a stronger reason.


What better reason is there to call off a date than knowing you're 99% likely not compatible? Why waste time and money? She's not in a relationship with this guy. She's not married to him. She owes him nothing and vice versa.


----------



## CharlieParker

Mr The Other said:


> - It suggests that he cannot cook. Cooking is a fairly basic life skill and if he cannot cook for himself, it is something he has to make up for.


Are you suggesting he cooks for her on the first date? A little too personal, no?

Granted my wife and I did cook (grilled seafood kebobs) on our first date, but we had already slept together.


----------



## wantshelp

SimplyAmorous said:


> Lately I am beginning to feel I just don't belong on this forum.. it seems everyone is high class... can't relate to most people here.. I'd rather go to a nice Chinese buffet... This probably sounds pathetic too...only a loser would suggest that..


 @SimplyAmorous, you totally belong here! I love reading you're insightful, level-headed posts. My view of TAM is that of a very diverse community. People have wildly different opinions and backgrounds. But that's a good thing. Learning about others' perceptions allows us to understand those around us better. We wouldn't learn anything talking to people that are exactly like us, right?


----------



## CharlieParker

SimplyAmorous said:


> Lately I am beginning to feel I just don't belong on this forum.. it seems everyone is high class... can't relate to most people here.. I'd rather go to a nice Chinese buffet... This probably sounds pathetic too...only a loser would suggest that..


Stop it, you're not pathetic or a loser. 

That, and I want pics of your plate at the Chinese buffet


----------



## ne9907

AVR1962 said:


> Did you go on a second date?


Yes. The sex was amazing. Did not last.


----------



## Mr The Other

CharlieParker said:


> Are you suggesting he cooks for her on the first date? A little too personal, no?
> 
> Granted my wife and I did cook (grilled seafood kebobs) on our first date, but we had already slept together.


I am not suggesting that. I am suggesting it is a red-flag, because the two reasons to eat at such a place are convenience (which does not apply to a pre-arranged date), or that you cannot cook and so you get used to such places.

In my second year in the USA, I would drive down from Boston to Rhode Island and wait until 7am for the site to open and I could start work. I would kill the time in a local Denny's and am still in contact with a waitress from there, who has been through a huge amounts of up and downs in his life. Although I do not go to Denny's, I still have affections from the place because of that. 

In this context, a trip to Dennys could be a knowing trip down memory lane, and bringing a lady there in that context would be about that trip, memories etc and could be a good venue. Because it is personal. However, without that context, I would not expect a lady to accept Denny's as a first date.


----------



## ne9907

Mr The Other said:


> No.
> 
> Clearly, I am not suggesting that. I am suggesting it is a red-flag, because the two reasons to eat at such a place are convenience (which does not apply to a pre-arranged date), or that you cannot cook and so you get used to such places.
> 
> In my second year in the USA, I would drive down from Boston to Rhode Island and wait until 7am for the site to open and I could start work. I would kill the time in a local Denny's and am still in contact with a waitress from there, who has been through a huge amounts of up and downs in his life. Although I do not go to Denny's, I still have affections from the place because of that.
> 
> In this context, a trip to Dennys could be a knowing trip down memory lane, and bringing a lady there in that context would be about that trip, memories etc and could be a good venue. Because it is personal. However, without that context, I would not expect a lady to accept Denny's as a first date.


Totally agree and disagree!! I love Denny's.... great drunken nights followed by a 3 am breakfast feast with friends ...

I'd totally go to Denny's as a first date!!

Then again...... my picker for men is not the best


----------



## WonkyNinja

AVR1962 said:


> Not real sure how old he is. I would say around my age. I am in my 50's. Can't recall the last time I ate at Golden Corral. I think the only reason we we was becasue we had 5 kids at home and they had discount rates for children. Boy, that takes me back a few years!!


You could always counter and suggest Chuck E Cheese's, tell him it brings back memories of when the kids were at home. 

One of the highlights of my D growing up was being told "I'm too old to go to Chuck E Cheese now". I nearly cried tears of joy that day!!


----------



## Evinrude58

Code:







Celes said:


> What better reason is there to call off a date than knowing you're 99% likely not compatible? Why waste time and money? She's not in a relationship with this guy. She's not married to him. She owes him nothing and vice versa.


I believe she owes him a date. One agrees, they go, unless of course there are some dangerous or particularly discouraging events. The choice of restaurants shouldn't be that discouraging (just my opinion, and I know she couldn't care less, nor should she). She wants princess treatment, possibly?
If she thought the guy was worth a date, she might have offered to go to another location of her choosing, informing the date that it would be her treat. Of course, if you're searching for a guy with money, status, and good taste(nothing wrong with that, I guess), she should just do what she did.

It all turned out as it should, I suppose. But, she should have told him in the first place she agreed to the date, with stipulations. Because that's what this was for her. Then he could have had the option of choosing a better place, or choosing a different date to take. This way, he likely cleared his schedule just to be put out.


----------



## prunus

WonkyNinja said:


> One of the highlights of my D growing up was being told "I'm too old to go to Chuck E Cheese now". I nearly cried tears of joy that day!!


Haha! I'm so glad those days are over!


----------



## Mr The Other

ne9907 said:


> Totally agree and disagree!! I love Denny's.... great drunken nights followed by a 3 am breakfast feast with friends ...
> 
> I'd totally go to Denny's as a first date!!
> 
> Then again...... my picker for men is not the best


Haha! Any man with a good picker will hone in on you with a wonderful attitude like that!

I was out with a lad, who was there to learn social skill, and actually did the test run. I had just met a girl, and suggested we met next at Dennys - she was actually looked at me like she had not believe what she had just heard. I told her the story, but completely accepted she would not want to go because no-one wants to go to Dennys, it is a bit out there....a real break from the normal blah blah of what people do....and her mind changed completely. Thought we actually ended up going for coffee stereotypically enough.

It was a lesson in context. If there is a personal connection, it is a great choice. If it is the end of an outrageous night on town, it is a great context. If it is for a quiet romantic dinner with someone you have not made a connection with yet.....not so much.


----------



## WonkyNinja

MSalmoides said:


> Red Lobster is a favorite! Dem biscuits ma!
> 
> ~MS


Did you know that they sell the biscuit mix in packets? Actual Red Lobster official with spice mix packet for the butter topping, not a "me too" copy. They're easy to make and taste every bit as good as the restaurant. I've got them at Walmart, never seen them at Target or local grocery store though.


----------



## prunus

WonkyNinja said:


> Did you know that they sell the biscuit mix in packets? Actual Red Lobster official with spice mix packet for the butter topping, not a "me too" copy. They're easy to make and taste every bit as good as the restaurant. I've got them at Walmart, never seen them at Target or local grocery store though.


Costco sells a HUGE box of the mix. I've never bought it, though the kids almost always beg me to.


----------



## Mr The Other

Evinrude58 said:


> Code:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I believe she owes him a date. One agrees, they go, unless of course there are some dangerous or particularly discouraging events. The choice of restaurants shouldn't be that discouraging (just my opinion, and I know she couldn't care less, nor should she). She wants princess treatment, possibly?
> If she thought the guy was worth a date, she might have offered to go to another location of her choosing, informing the date that it would be her treat. Of course, if you're searching for a guy with money, status, and good taste(nothing wrong with that, I guess), she should just do what she did.
> 
> It all turned out as it should, I suppose. But, she should have told him in the first place she agreed to the date, with stipulations. Because that's what this was for her. Then he could have had the option of choosing a better place, or choosing a different date to take. This way, he likely cleared his schedule just to be put out.


If she does not believe she would be interested, then she would be wasting his time. No-one owes anyone a date.

She could have suggested that they meet at a coffee place first. However, this suggests he asked if they could have a date, she accepted and then he came up with a suggestion. This is poor social skills, it would be better to suggest the particular thing first.


----------



## Evinrude58

Mr The Other said:


> If she does not believe she would be interested, then she would be wasting his time. No-one owes anyone a date.
> 
> She could have suggested that they meet at a coffee place first. However, this suggests he asked if they could have a date, she accepted and then he came up with a suggestion. This is poor social skills, it would be better to suggest the particular thing first.


I disagree. They don't owe anyone a date until they ACCEPT when asked. Then they don't "owe", but it is rude if one accepts and then doesn't GO. Sounds like OP should have found more out about the person BEFORE they accepted.

In this case, I agree that both are well served by OP not going, however. I just hereby declare that rudeness was exhibited.


----------



## Blondilocks

CharlieParker said:


> Are you suggesting he cooks for her on the first date? A little too personal, no?
> 
> *Granted my wife and I did cook (grilled seafood kebobs) on our first date, but we had already slept together.*



:surprise::grin2: You owe us a story, Charlie.


----------



## 225985

Eating at buffets does not mean a person is overweight. Eating TOO MUCH at the buffet is the problem. 

I am slim. We eat at GC occasionally for the sheer variety of choices. That's what makes it fun. The quality of the food is so-so. 

We normally time it to eat when the buffet starts to avoid the mess others makes. 

And we bring hand wipes to use after touching the spoons.


----------



## Mr The Other

SimplyAmorous said:


> Our 1st date was eating meatballs at his house.. we were very young too.. I've never drank.. so drinks have no appeal to me... I've been on another thread here that went on & on & on about if a man used a dang coupon on a 1st date.. personally my own husband wouldn't do that (I asked him) but still this would not be something where I felt .. he's a loser.. he's an idiot.. I would see it as a "conversation piece" about money... I don't see that as such a bad thing on a date...
> 
> Lately I am beginning to feel I just don't belong on this forum.. it seems everyone is high class... can't relate to most people here.. I'd rather go to a nice Chinese buffet... This probably sounds pathetic too...only a loser would suggest that..
> 
> Actually I feel a decent man who really LIKED A WOMAN, wanted to impress...he should ask HER where she wants to go....this has always been what my husband has done.. but Me.. I rarely suggest something expensive.. but now & then we do splurge.. yes.
> 
> I was out today...Golden Corral came up in a conversation by another couple...how they go there...I didn't know they had one in that town...here I was just telling them.. "OH we need to go there!".. ironic..
> 
> I must be hugely deprived or something.. I am very happy to go to these dives ....We go to Red Lobster once or twice a year at the most.. that's my favorite.. I wait till we have coupons.. for us.. that is luxury eating out.. but we do have a pretty large family...I don't think we've ever taken them all with us (yet).


Having you round his house first date is impressive. Kudos to him. And to you, you seem a catch.

Where the OP's amor went wrong was not learning enough about her to understand what she might like and that need only take a minute or two. 

My impression is that most women would prefer that the man suggest somewhere, and that they suggest somewhere that suggests they have some connection. In your case, that understanding would mean asking you, in another case it might mean suggesting the Golden Corral, in another it would be a coffee place where you would both be comfortable and able to be open. Again, this is a man who has twice walked their dogs together as a first date, and it has always been good.


----------



## Evinrude58

I should point out that I asked my current gf on our second date to shoot .22's in the backyard.

I also saw a gag pic on FB yesterday where a guy put "you might be a ******* if you keep bait in your refrigerator", and the bottom crisper had water with live fishing minnows swimming in it. I was somewhat intrigued by the idea.. LOL

So I think that whether one is a city-slicker or country person, southerner or northerner.....
That might have something to do with the Golden Corral choice.

My son and I stop at Golden Corral on our way back through a city from fishing trips. I'm sure we smell great. We love it, ha ha.

So....... I take back what I said. With smelly, low-class people like me eating there, it's no place to take a first date.

Yours truly,
Guilty as charged


----------



## As'laDain

the first time i met my wife was at a starbucks. 

i cant for the life of me remember what the first restaurant was that we went to.


----------



## CharlieParker

Blondilocks said:


> :surprise::grin2: You owe us a story, Charlie.


An out of town work projected stalled until FedEx came the next morning. So we hit the hotel bar. Much talking (we never socialized before) and drinking led us to her room. After we got back I went to her place for our first real date, cooking the kabobs (and more sex).


----------



## wilson

Unless there's some sort of ironic twist to the story, it's a big, red flag to go to a cheap buffet place as a first date. The only way I could see it being a positive if there was some relevance to you in a special way. For example, if you had previously said your parents first met at a buffet 40 years ago and have been married ever since, it would be romantic that he wants your relationship to start off the same way. But otherwise, it's probably setting the tone for the relationship and gives you a good insight into his personality.

There's nothing wrong with cheap first dates. A date where you have sandwiches in the park can be a great way to get started. But there should be some romantic aspect to the date. That can be because of the expense of the date, or because of the meaning.


----------



## Chuck71

"Ann.... what type of foods do you enjoy?" Takes maybe 31 seconds to find out. My fav Italian bistro is my usual 1st date deal if it is not a coffee / meet n greet 30 minute deal. Classy atmosphere and the owner knows me on a first name basis.... I put his kids through college LOL. Moderate priced... relaxed environment. Never really had a bad date there.

Usually... today, it is now a meet n greet so at least you know there might be something there, to lead to an actual 1st date. Golden Corral would not be my choice as a 1st "real" date. I did do a Denny's once last year but it was the best place for us location-wise. Being in rural area, not many choices.

But if it is a low-key 1st meet, Starbucks, coffee shop, or anywhere if it is a meet n greet. A Hangover Crew friend met a girl at McDs parking lot (location) for a meet n greet... talked for eight (yes eight) hours. Shared a biscuit after they opened at 5am. You never know....


----------



## Idyit

Something in me really wants to like the move on this guys part. Drop the pretense, change the rules and see what we're both made of...at the Golden Corral. BUT.

A couple of years ago I was traveling back home with my boys from a baseball tournament. They wanted GC so off we went. In front of us was a couple (late 30s / early 40s). They were overdressed in a awkward sort of way. Bad suit, dirty shoes etc. I wanted to like that they were there and enjoying each others company. But they weren't really talking and expressions didn't indicate joy. It was depressing to witness. My boys enjoyed it thoroughly though.

So, my 2 cents is taking the pass probably saved you the odd stares and a painful memory.

~ Passio


----------



## browser

I took a first date to an all you can eat chinese buffet which included crab legs.

To get out the crab meat I'll sometimes blow through one side. I hit her in the chest and face a few times.

She told me she liked my style. 

Unfortunately we only lasted a few months but it wasn't because of the buffet first date.


----------



## MSalmoides

...


----------



## KJ_Simmons

From reading this thread, "coffee" is so cliched now. It's like the movie theater date as a teen. Kudos to anybody forging their own path.

I don't even like coffee, so I guess I'm screwed were I to be single and dating again.


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## MrsAldi

I think if you have certain food tastes then dating in certain can be tricky. 
For example, if I was single and a guy suggested a vegan place, I would have to ask him to change or cancel altogether if he was vegan or vegetarian, it just wouldn't work out, I like meat. 

Sent from my B1-730HD using Tapatalk


----------



## Bananapeel

Mr. Nail said:


> Well it has been my experience with my long term partner of 3 decades that when she says "you choose the place", She will quickly reject my first three proposals. She's lucky I hate buffets. We usually end up eating at the one place she had in mind but for some unfathomable reason was unwilling to mention.


It's just a $hit test. The best way to stop her from doing that is just leave her at home while you go out to the restaurant you wanted. But be prepared that there will be a $hit storm from her when you get home and you just have to laugh it off and be committed to the idea that you didn't do anything wrong. Something like "hey babe, I'm not sure why you are so upset. You said you didn't want to go there so I respected your decision. If you've changed your mind I'd be happy to share the doggie bag with you, but it won't be as good as when it was warm...." 


I'd love to ask know if the guy was asking the OP out as a test or if he really likes GC.


----------



## prunus

browser said:


> I took a first date to an all you can eat chinese buffet which included crab legs.
> 
> To get out the crab meat I'll sometimes blow through one side. I hit her in the chest and face a few times.
> 
> She told me she liked my style.
> 
> Unfortunately we only lasted a few months but it wasn't because of the buffet first date.


I'm sorry. I just can't stop laughing at this.


----------



## Herschel

AVR1962 said:


> I agree. I was the pursuer of my ex and it seemed I was always trying to get him into the relationship so I will not do it. Golden Corral invitation tells me either he is a buffet person, has no money/or is tight with money, has no sense of what is nice and never will, or it is close to his house and it is convenient to him. None of which are the mentality to entertain or care to spend time with.
> 
> So single men, I hope you are reading!!!!! Don't ask a first date to Golden Corral!!!!!!


It could also mean, "I am a mother ****ing pimp and I can take a woman where ever I want cause I know she'll come back for more." 

It could also be an attempt to weed out the superficials.

But mostly it's pretty darn classless.


----------



## badsanta

AVR1962 said:


> What kind of a guy chooses Golden Corral for a first date?


OMG that place is expensive!!!

For the $10 per person price, I could grill two fillet mignons!


----------



## Mr The Other

Herschel said:


> It could also mean, "I am a mother ****ing pimp and I can take a woman where ever I want cause I know she'll come back for more."
> 
> It could also be an attempt to weed out the superficials.
> 
> But mostly it's pretty darn classless.


Yes. It is a little classless. Something can be cheap or free on the first date, but if there is meaning to it. Regardless of the cost, it is impersonal and unimaginative.


----------



## KJ_Simmons

Herschel said:


> It could also be an attempt to weed out the superficials.


I bet the guy is f'ing LOADED. OP just missed the gravy train!


----------



## kag123

This thread is super amusing but, man, I'm so glad I am not in the dating scene! All these rules are exhausting to read about, much less navigate through in real life. No thanks! If anything were to happen to my marriage...it would be full on crazy cat lady for me.


----------



## prunus

Mr The Other said:


> Yes. It is a little classless. Something can be cheap or free on the first date, but if there is meaning to it. Regardless of the cost, it is impersonal and unimaginative.


While I agree with this, the OP agreed to a date with this man, told him to pick the place and that he would be there. Then she bailed on him while he was likely getting ready to go on the date because she thought it was laughable. I just think it's rude. 

PS I can't stand GC or buffets. Neither are my thing. But, I would have gone in this situation.


----------



## Lila

KJ_Simmons said:


> I bet the guy is f'ing LOADED. OP just missed the gravy train!


LOL, doubt it. Any man who is sh!t testing potential dates is probably the furthest thing from a 'gravy train'. He may have money but he's no prize. 

And just to be fair, we all know what a woman who is willing to give up on her standards to date a guy with money is called......Gold Digger.


----------



## prunus

kag123 said:


> This thread is super amusing but, man, I'm so glad I am not in the dating scene! All these rules are exhausting to read about, much less navigate through in real life. No thanks! If anything were to happen to my marriage...it would be full on crazy cat lady for me.


I'm already terrified at the thought of dating again. This is scaring me even more. :wink2:


----------



## samyeagar

Thinking about this, and putting myself in place of AVR, and a woman set a first date with me to Golden Corral, I am not sure I would give that any more thought than I would if she invited me to a multi Michelin Starred Chefs restaurant, or a picnic, or Starbucks. If I actually liked her, I'd just be happy spending the time with her.


----------



## Lila

kag123 said:


> This thread is super amusing but, man, I'm so glad I am not in the dating scene! All these rules are exhausting to read about, much less navigate through in real life. No thanks! If anything were to happen to my marriage...it would be full on crazy cat lady for me.


Based on everything I've heard my sister say, it's not that bad. The key is to be genuine with the goal of finding someone compatible. 

She's actually admitted to me that she prefers dating 'older' guys (40+) because they value their time and don't wish to waste hers. She can pick out the posers a mile away.


----------



## browser

Lila said:


> She's actually admitted to me that she prefers dating 'older' guys (40+)


Then she better get used to going to buffets.


----------



## Lila

browser said:


> Then she better get used to going to buffets.


:lol::rofl::lol::rofl::lol::rofl: 

If you knew my sister, then you'd understand the hilarity of your statement. 

To give you an idea......uhm, no. I don't think she's stepped foot in a buffet, that wasn't at the Bellagio, Las Vegas (trip paid for by her date), since she was a child. As my very good co-worker who once met her said "I don't have enough Benjamins to ride that ride". She's not a Gold Digger but she makes no bones about her likes. I have to respect her for her blunt honesty. I couldn't do it.


----------



## syhoybenden

badsanta said:


> OMG that place is expensive!!!
> 
> For the $10 per person price, I could grill two fillet mignons!


OR 3 Chinese buffets, toilet paper not included.


----------



## Spotthedeaddog

AVR1962 said:


> So here is the situation.....a guy asks you to dinner, you agree and you tell him to pick the place and you tell him you can be there at ____ time. He texts you with the address for Golden Corral. After laughing hysterically and standing there is total bewilderment, what do you do? Go ahead with plans? What kind of a guy chooses Golden Corral for a first date?


counter offer to pay to take him some place else you would prefer...


----------



## WonkyNinja

prunus said:


> Costco sells a HUGE box of the mix. I've never bought it, though the kids almost always beg me to.


How did I miss that?


----------



## AVR1962

prunus said:


> I'll start by saying I've only read this post and I despise Golden Corral. But, you did tell him to pick the place and that you'd be there. So, yes, you go ahead with the plans. Or, perhaps you spare him all together and cancel and never contact him again. Going into the date with that attitude doesn't sound good for that guy since you're so judgemental. Maybe he really likes the place, even though you think it's hilarious. If you didn't really want him to pick the place, then you shouldn't have said that.


No, him picking the place speaks volumes.


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## AVR1962

KJ_Simmons said:


> I bet the guy is f'ing LOADED. OP just missed the gravy train!


Kind of don't think so. I know someone that did a little leg work for me and found out some good info. I think I made a wise choice.


----------



## AVR1962

samyeagar said:


> Thinking about this, and putting myself in place of AVR, and a woman set a first date with me to Golden Corral, I am not sure I would give that any more thought than I would if she invited me to a multi Michelin Starred Chefs restaurant, or a picnic, or Starbucks. If I actually liked her, I'd just be happy spending the time with her.


I agree, but I had not met this guy yet.


----------



## AVR1962

Chuck71 said:


> "Ann.... what type of foods do you enjoy?" Takes maybe 31 seconds to find out. My fav Italian bistro is my usual 1st date deal if it is not a coffee / meet n greet 30 minute deal. Classy atmosphere and the owner knows me on a first name basis.... I put his kids through college LOL. Moderate priced... relaxed environment. Never really had a bad date there.
> 
> Usually... today, it is now a meet n greet so at least you know there might be something there, to lead to an actual 1st date. Golden Corral would not be my choice as a 1st "real" date. I did do a Denny's once last year but it was the best place for us location-wise. Being in rural area, not many choices.
> 
> But if it is a low-key 1st meet, Starbucks, coffee shop, or anywhere if it is a meet n greet. A Hangover Crew friend met a girl at McDs parking lot (location) for a meet n greet... talked for eight (yes eight) hours. Shared a biscuit after they opened at 5am. You never know....


Chuck....I love Thai, Indian, Spanish, Greek, German, Irish. I lived overseas for 16 years and it speaks alot for the type of food I enjoy!


----------



## AVR1962

This gets better!!!! So, what I did not say in my original post was that we originally had planned for dinner tonight (Friday). You see I had been trying to organize a singles group outing for a happy hour but there was only 3 takers and one of them was this guy. He contacted me privately about dinner. He then text me to let me know "he forgot" about a fundraiser event he had in his schedule for Friday and wondered if we could get together Sunday (this weekend). The next day (Thursday) he contacted me asking me if I wanted to go to dinner that night and that is how this whole Golden Corral thing came about. Ha, well the person who started the singles groups contacted me today letting me know that this man contacted her telling her I cancelled out on a dinner with him. Are you freakin' serious??? Needless to say, thinking this guys has issues, I blocked him from all contact. Not sure what's going on there but i don't think I care to know either.


----------



## 225985

AVR1962 said:


> Kind of don't think so. I know someone that did a little leg work for me and found out some good info. I think I made a wise choice.




I know no one wants their time wasted, and you have your standards, but this was just a meal in a public place for an hour. 

If nothing else, it would have served as a practice date, since you have been out if the dating pool for a long time. You might have had a pleasant time, even if you decided not to see him again.


----------



## Hope Shimmers

Golden Corral. I've been there once. Do they still have that enormous block of cheese with the slicer that you use to make flakes of cheese?

In microbiology lab in college we sampled and grew bacteria in petri dishes from various places. One place was the sneeze guard and plating surface of a buffet/salad bar. It was worse than the toilet handle. I swear, true story. Disgusting.

I am not picky, but 'where to eat' has sometimes been an issue on dates. One guy, an attorney, wanted to take me to a sushi place. I don't do raw fish, sorry. I told him that, and he wouldn't consider a different restaurant (damn attorneys) so instead we went out for coffee. By this time I was having a bad feeling, which I confirmed when we met and he looked literally 25 years older than his photo. He later asked me out again, to the same sushi restaurant.

Another time I dated a guy who took me to a high-end seafood place, but he would only let me order something HE liked because he wanted us to each share our food. I wanted lobster (I would have paid) but he "wanted" me to order scallops. Then we went back to his place to watch a movie, and I took off my clothes and we had sex in the hot tub. Then he called in the morning saying how happy he was, and I refused to date him again. That was really bad and definitely not me. He was the director of a large hospital and technically my boss.


----------



## MSalmoides

...


----------



## MSalmoides

...


----------



## Evinrude58

Granted, GC is a poor choice. Not likely to impress a woman on the first date, and not make her feel valued as a date. But maybe the guy likes this particular one, or maybe it was close to his next paycheck. I don't get why he said you'd cancelled if you hadn't. That is weird.
Then you say you did cancel, minutes before the date (you even thought he might be in the shower when you cancelled). Texted the cancellation, I guess?


That's pretty rough to cancel that last minute, only over a choice in restaurant.


----------



## SimplyAmorous

Blondilocks said:


> Your statement that you are not a high class person because you enjoy buffets. One time you and your husband wanted to try a hotel but felt your car wasn't good enough for the parking lot. It seems people who are wealthier than you make you feel less than; at least, that is the impression you leave.
> 
> Neither money nor its ability to pay for higher priced restaurants, hotels, cars etc. confers 'class'.


It's absolutely true that our 19 yr old bomb would have stuck out like a sore thumb at Nemacolin Resort.. . we could have been dressed to the hilts.. even fit in appearance wise.. but the car had to go !! At least me & him can laugh about this... we were going on & on about our painted tin can, driving away from there... there is some sort of high with being able to let go like this.. we feel the acceptance we have together... it doesn't matter that our vehicle would not measure up ... who cares really... we're happy... ...then that old classic "Still the One" comes on the radio....I'd crank it...singing my heart out, he'd give me a look.....it's more about these moments over the outward appearance of our cars.. it's just that I KNOW others do judge these things ... 

It's like this thread, the car thread, my last thread ......heck even the one closed today..about the wife loosing attraction to her husband when her income hit the glass ceiling & she's making XXX more .... This is REALITY... I'm simply acknowledging what others are saying....

Big money, status, prestigious social climbing, higher class lifestyles... it affects many things -I don't even know if it's subtle.. we're often pretty in the face about it .... it comes with the territory....the comments are there...if a man drives a crappy car...add a joke..if the restaurant choice is not ______ enough....add a joke , dump a date.. To me.. we can hash this out every which way... but I find this all frivolous until a person goes beyond a meeting place... getting to the MEAT of another person....one may be pleasantly surprised... 

What is so enlightening about anonymous forums is -people speak it LIKE IT IS....the good, the bad & the ugly... I love this, would never change it !!! ...but at the same time...we spew the worst in us too.. how we look upon others... 

We've done well for ourselves , considering our family size....I'm as good managing $$ as my husband is holding out for my orgasm (some of those great pluses in our marriage)... ...Even if it means we'll use coupons, I'll happily shop at consignment shops for our clothes many times... we'll buy older cars & run them till they are dead.....may have a dent or 2 when there is 2 teens learning to drive.. I've been confident enough to just speak it like it is.. some may feel that's insecurity... I just am what I am.. 

I babysat for a very wealthy man today, he's always treated me like family.. so often he will make the same comment - did it again today.. had he married me , he'd have been debt free X yrs ago, could be retired now... you know what.. I'd never want his life.. he's never home.. he's a workaholic.. he sat there telling me how he wants to redo his whole kitchen.. still looks like a page ripped out of a house beautiful magazine.. he wants to rip up the floor in another room... also flawless...it's like he has to be continually DOING... as beautiful as his house is, his "eat off the hood" classic cars... I'd still take a lower income guy I could let my hair down with...contrasting what a life would be like with him ... over what I have known... 

I'd be complaining he was never home.. I could shop till I dropped but this would not fulfill me.. 



Kivlor said:


> I agree with this very strongly. Don't waste your time putting up a facade, and trying to wine and dine someone, if that's not how you are normally. The mask will slip eventually.
> 
> Personally, I'm cheap. Super cheap. So Golden Corral would be out for me as a first date. It's coffee, or a beer at a quiet bar, or something equally relaxed, low-key and low-price. That way we can both excuse ourselves if it's not going well / we're not interested, and money doesn't even play into the situation.


 I'd have to open my mouth on this one... don't mind the cheap at all.. but I don't drink coffee (I'd get hot cocoa)...nor beer (a Pepsi would be good).....Bars ...probably just the ones I have been to, but when you walk through the door.. it's like every head turns gawking at us up & down...but I know plenty have really good food along with the bar section...



wantshelp said:


> @SimplyAmorous, you totally belong here! I love reading you're insightful, level-headed posts. My view of TAM is that of a very diverse community. People have wildly different opinions and backgrounds. But that's a good thing. Learning about others' perceptions allows us to understand those around us better. We wouldn't learn anything talking to people that are exactly like us, right?


Yes.. I very much agree...We'll find a lot of that here... it's GOOD to have our thinking Challenged.. The different backgrounds, life experiences, whether good or bad, our beliefs, political views, differing love languages / temperaments, etc etc ....it can get heated- but sure keeps us tuned in too ... 



blueinbr said:


> Eating at buffets does not mean a person is overweight. Eating TOO MUCH at the buffet is the problem.


 I like buffets as I enjoy making up my own dish .... we're still the same weight as when we married ... I don't think anything could get my husband to gain.. he doesn't eat as much as he used to... but he's one of those people who can gorge - it just doesn't stick...


----------



## uhtred

The wealthiest person I know used to drive a junker Toyota, just never bothered to replace it. He also had a private heliport at his house, and a jet a a nearby airport. My wife and I sometimes stay at fancy hotels. The really good ones don't bat an eye at our traveling clothes and battered old suitcases with brightly colored stickers so we can find them on the carousel. 

If you are every feeling like you have missed out by not being wealthy, remember the Robinson poem, it can be more true than you might think...

Whenever Richard Cory went down town,
We people on the pavement looked at him;
He was a gentleman from sole to crown,
Clean favored, and imperially slim.

And he was always quietly arrayed,
And he was always human when he talked;
But still he fluttered pulses when he said,
"Good-morning," and he glittered when he walked.

And he was rich - yes, richer than a king,
And admirably schooled in every grace;
In fine, we thought that he was everything
To make us wish that we were in his place.

So on we worked, and waited for the light,
And went without the meat, and cursed the bread;
And Richard Cory, one calm summer night,
Went home and put a bullet through his head



If you are happy with your life, you are far luckier than many.






SimplyAmorous said:


> It's absolutely true that our 19 yr old bomb would have stuck out like a sore thumb at Nemacolin Resort.. . we could have been dressed to the hilts.. even fit in appearance wise.. but the car had to go !! At least me & him can laugh about this... we were going on & on about our painted tin can, driving away from there... there is some sort of high with being able to let go like this.. we feel the acceptance we have together... it doesn't matter that our vehicle would not measure up ... who cares really... we're happy... ...then that old classic "Still the One" comes on the radio....I'd crank it...singing my heart out, he'd give me a look.....it's more about these moments over the outward appearance of our cars.. it's just that I KNOW others do judge these things ...
> 
> It's like this thread, the car thread, my last thread ......heck even the one closed today..about the wife loosing attraction to her husband when her income hit the glass ceiling & she's making XXX more .... This is REALITY... I'm simply acknowledging what others are saying....
> 
> Big money, status, prestigious social climbing, higher class lifestyles... it affects many things -I don't even know if it's subtle.. we're often pretty in the face about it .... it comes with the territory....the comments are there...if a man drives a crappy car...add a joke..if the restaurant choice is not ______ enough....add a joke , dump a date.. To me.. we can hash this out every which way... but I find this all frivolous until a person goes beyond a meeting place... getting to the MEAT of another person....one may be pleasantly surprised...
> 
> What is so enlightening about anonymous forums is -people speak it LIKE IT IS....the good, the bad & the ugly... I love this, would never change it !!! ...but at the same time...we spew the worst in us too.. how we look upon others...
> 
> We've done well for ourselves , considering our family size....I'm as good managing $$ as my husband is holding out for my orgasm (some of those great pluses in our marriage)... ...Even if it means we'll use coupons, I'll happily shop at consignment shops for our clothes many times... we'll buy older cars & run them till they are dead.....may have a dent or 2 when there is 2 teens learning to drive.. I've been confident enough to just speak it like it is.. some may feel that's insecurity... I just am what I am..
> 
> I babysat for a very wealthy man today, he's always treated me like family.. so often he will make the same comment - did it again today.. had he married me , he'd have been debt free X yrs ago, could be retired now... you know what.. I'd never want his life.. he's never home.. he's a workaholic.. he sat there telling me how he wants to redo his whole kitchen.. still looks like a page ripped out of a house beautiful magazine.. he wants to rip up the floor in another room... also flawless...it's like he has to be continually DOING... as beautiful as his house is, his "eat off the hood" classic cars... I'd still take a lower income guy I could let my hair down with...contrasting what a life would be like with him ... over what I have known...
> 
> I'd be complaining he was never home.. I could shop till I dropped but this would not fulfill me..
> 
> I'd have to open my mouth on this one... don't mind the cheap at all.. but I don't drink coffee (I'd get hot cocoa)...nor beer (a Pepsi would be good).....Bars ...probably just the ones I have been to, but when you walk through the door.. it's like every head turns gawking at us up & down...but I know plenty have really good food along with the bar section...
> 
> 
> 
> Yes.. I very much agree...We'll find a lot of that here... it's GOOD to have our thinking Challenged.. The different backgrounds, life experiences, whether good or bad, our beliefs, political views, differing love languages / temperaments, etc etc ....it can get heated- but sure keeps us tuned in too ...
> 
> I like buffets as I enjoy making up my own dish .... we're still the same weight as when we married ... I don't think anything could get my husband to gain.. he doesn't eat as much as he used to... but he's one of those people who can gorge - it just doesn't stick...


----------



## Wolfman1968

SimplyAmorous said:


> his mistake was not INSISTING she choose... that's proper etiquette when a man really digs a woman..


Actually, I'm going to disagree with this. It's not proper etiquette at all, and there's a reason for that.

The person asking is the host, typically. The host should chose a place that he thinks his guest(s) would enjoy, but is also within his budget. 

It would be embarrassing indeed if the guest chose a place far above the means of the host, and it would be awkward for the host to have to say so, as well.

If the guest does not like the choice of venue, it is then appropriate to decline the invitation.


----------



## Kivlor

SimplyAmorous said:


> I'd have to open my mouth on this one... don't mind the cheap at all.. but I don't drink coffee (I'd get hot cocoa)...nor beer (a Pepsi would be good).....Bars ...probably just the ones I have been to, but when you walk through the door.. it's like every head turns gawking at us up & down...but I know plenty have really good food along with the bar section...


Well, the good news is that most good coffee shops have excellent hot chocolate! But I'm not really sure I could trust someone who doesn't drink coffee :wink2:

Bars are hit and miss. If I'm choosing one, it's usually a quiet, low traffic one. Of course, I don't really drink anymore, so it's mostly coffee these days...


----------



## lucy999

Evinrude58 said:


> I should point out that I asked my current gf on our second date to shoot .22's in the backyard.


***swoooon*** good job, man.


----------



## bandit.45

I took a date to an indoor shooting range. She had a blast. Then we went to eat a breakfast/dinner at Waffle House. That was a fun date.


----------



## SimplyAmorous

Wolfman1968 said:


> Actually, I'm going to disagree with this. It's not proper etiquette at all, and there's a reason for that.
> 
> The person asking is the host, typically. The host should chose a place that he thinks his guest(s) would enjoy, but is also within his budget.
> 
> It would be embarrassing indeed if the guest chose a place far above the means of the host, and it would be awkward for the host to have to say so, as well.
> 
> If the guest does not like the choice of venue, it is then appropriate to decline the invitation.


Nothing wrong with this either... of course.. but still.. I appreciate if the man asks.. if that makes him BETA.. that's fine too... I feel it shows he is extending his care to what she would enjoy.. I would never suggest a higher class place when 1st meeting someone... but that's just me... 

This would be my husbands proper etiquette. When we were younger.. we went to Ponderosa a lot.. but I wouldn't allow us to go unless we had a coupon -he wasn't complaining about this... we felt we had a future together and we were saving early on...


----------



## samyeagar

Granted, my wife and I met online, and had talked for many hours over a couple of weeks before we met, so by the time we actually started dating, I already had a very good idea of her likes and dislikes, where good places to go would be, bad places to go would be, good date ideas, bad date ideas...never having to ask her straight out, rather just paying attention to what she was saying, and actually listening to her.


----------



## Andy1001

SimplyAmorous said:


> It's absolutely true that our 19 yr old bomb would have stuck out like a sore thumb at Nemacolin Resort.. . we could have been dressed to the hilts.. even fit in appearance wise.. but the car had to go !! At least me & him can laugh about this... we were going on & on about our painted tin can, driving away from there... there is some sort of high with being able to let go like this.. we feel the acceptance we have together... it doesn't matter that our vehicle would not measure up ... who cares really... we're happy... ...then that old classic "Still the One" comes on the radio....I'd crank it...singing my heart out, he'd give me a look.....it's more about these moments over the outward appearance of our cars.. it's just that I KNOW others do judge these things ...
> 
> It's like this thread, the car thread, my last thread ......heck even the one closed today..about the wife loosing attraction to her husband when her income hit the glass ceiling & she's making XXX more .... This is REALITY... I'm simply acknowledging what others are saying....
> 
> Big money, status, prestigious social climbing, higher class lifestyles... it affects many things -I don't even know if it's subtle.. we're often pretty in the face about it .... it comes with the territory....the comments are there...if a man drives a crappy car...add a joke..if the restaurant choice is not ______ enough....add a joke , dump a date.. To me.. we can hash this out every which way... but I find this all frivolous until a person goes beyond a meeting place... getting to the MEAT of another person....one may be pleasantly surprised...
> 
> What is so enlightening about anonymous forums is -people speak it LIKE IT IS....the good, the bad & the ugly... I love this, would never change it !!! ...but at the same time...we spew the worst in us too.. how we look upon others...
> 
> We've done well for ourselves , considering our family size....I'm as good managing $$ as my husband is holding out for my orgasm (some of those great pluses in our marriage)... ...Even if it means we'll use coupons, I'll happily shop at consignment shops for our clothes many times... we'll buy older cars & run them till they are dead.....may have a dent or 2 when there is 2 teens learning to drive.. I've been confident enough to just speak it like it is.. some may feel that's insecurity... I just am what I am..
> 
> I babysat for a very wealthy man today, he's always treated me like family.. so often he will make the same comment - did it again today.. had he married me , he'd have been debt free X yrs ago, could be retired now... you know what.. I'd never want his life.. he's never home.. he's a workaholic.. he sat there telling me how he wants to redo his whole kitchen.. still looks like a page ripped out of a house beautiful magazine.. he wants to rip up the floor in another room... also flawless...it's like he has to be continually DOING... as beautiful as his house is, his "eat off the hood" classic cars... I'd still take a lower income guy I could let my hair down with...contrasting what a life would be like with him ... over what I have known...
> 
> I'd be complaining he was never home.. I could shop till I dropped but this would not fulfill me..
> 
> I'd have to open my mouth on this one... don't mind the cheap at all.. but I don't drink coffee (I'd get hot cocoa)...nor beer (a Pepsi would be good).....Bars ...probably just the ones I have been to, but when you walk through the door.. it's like every head turns gawking at us up & down...but I know plenty have really good food along with the bar section...
> 
> 
> 
> Yes.. I very much agree...We'll find a lot of that here... it's GOOD to have our thinking Challenged.. The different backgrounds, life experiences, whether good or bad, our beliefs, political views, differing love languages / temperaments, etc etc ....it can get heated- but sure keeps us tuned in too ...
> 
> I like buffets as I enjoy making up my own dish .... we're still the same weight as when we married ... I don't think anything could get my husband to gain.. he doesn't eat as much as he used to... but he's one of those people who can gorge - it just doesn't stick...


Is this the smurf mobile you are talking about.lol.I have eaten in some expensive restaurants and I always seem to leave hungry.I was staying in a hotel in London about six years ago and a very famous chef had opened a restaurant on site so I booked a table.Everything on the menu was described in a way that must have been written by a professor of English literature.I didn't really know what half the food was so I ordered a starter that had lamb as it's main ingredient and a beef main.
The starter came out on a spoon! That's right one spoon.It was almost thirty pounds sterling and it was on one fcukin spoon.
The main course had about twenty tiny pieces of food and the beef was about two ounces and it looked like the chef had waved it over the frying pan.it was almost completely raw.I didn't eat it and when the waiter asked me what was wrong I told him it still had a pulse.
I like eating in buffet restaurants but maybe a little more upmarket than Golden Corral (Sizzlers maybe lol) if on a date night.


----------



## Andy1001

Wolfman1968 said:


> Actually, I'm going to disagree with this. It's not proper etiquette at all, and there's a reason for that.
> 
> The person asking is the host, typically. The host should chose a place that he thinks his guest(s) would enjoy, but is also within his budget.
> 
> It would be embarrassing indeed if the guest chose a place far above the means of the host, and it would be awkward for the host to have to say so, as well.
> 
> If the guest does not like the choice of venue, it is then appropriate to decline the invitation.


I agree with you completely but also for another reason.I a man asks a woman out to dinner and she agrees then he should say how about going to (named restaurant)if she doesn't like it it's easy to suggest another one.This will let her know what sort of food he prefers and also his budget.In my opinion it looks really awkward to ask someone out without any idea of where you want to bring them and may come across as lack of confidence.


----------



## As'laDain

my favorite places to take dates to eat were not all that expensive at all. even today, my favorite restaurants to take my wife to are fairly inexpensive.

but, its never a chain restaurant. the local independents are where its at!


----------



## SimplyAmorous

Evinrude58 said:


> I should point out that I asked my current gf on our second date to shoot .22's in the backyard.
> 
> I also saw a gag pic on FB yesterday where a guy put "you might be a ******* if you keep bait in your refrigerator", and the bottom crisper had water with live fishing minnows swimming in it. I was somewhat intrigued by the idea.. LOL
> 
> So I think that whether one is a city-slicker or country person, southerner or northerner.....
> That might have something to do with the Golden Corral choice.
> 
> My son and I stop at Golden Corral on our way back through a city from fishing trips. I'm sure we smell great. We love it, ha ha.
> 
> So....... I take back what I said. With smelly, low-class people like me eating there, it's no place to take a first date.
> 
> Yours truly,
> Guilty as charged










... 



Evinrude58 said:


> If you are ever feeling like you have missed out by not being wealthy, remember the Robinson poem


I can't say I've felt this way..

When we started out.. we had dreams, like any couple...it was never about climbing ladders of success/ or being rich... but there were things I wanted BADLY / passionately ..... The loving husband by my side...at least 3 kids (times that by 2)... a house in the country with a little land (ended up with a lot of land) ... ideally he wanted me to stay home, his getting a higher paying job has allowed for this...but still I have worked some on the side to help get us debt free earlier.. 

There was a time I feared we couldn't have more children....was scheduled for an In vitro - willing to give up on our country dream - using the money for that...then suddenly I conceived, never needed to go there.. 

We've climbed the mountain together ...some close calls where we thought we'd be stuck here or there...but it all worked out..add in there a couple trips to Disney along the way.... I feel incredibly thankful for what has been, I really couldn't ask for more (like that song by Edwin McCain)...

Now it's more about our children (5 are sons)...realizing their dreams... Looking at what is stacked against them, dealing with modern relationships, all the attraction dynamics related to financial success, the costs of a college education, keeping grades up (one son is really struggling with calculus right now)... then all the fierce competition for landing the Good jobs ... it's always been a "dog eat dog" world , just seems more "cut throat" , unforgiving today... 

Just want them to be happy, find their place...this will give us great satisfaction.



Andy1001 said:


> Is this the smurf mobile you are talking about.lol.


 Before we painted it "too blue"... yes..


----------



## Andy1001

I occasionally do some work for the mighty Disney corporation and once when we had finished a job a few of us were invited to a restaurant near Disney called Victoria and Alberts.It is in one of the Disney owned hotels in Florida.There was ten courses as far as I remember and with wine pairing it was about $250 each,without gratuity.I don't drink wine but for all you got in the glass it didn't make much difference.
The food was delicious but the portions were tiny and for the money it was a rip off.


----------



## Celes

I would rather have 10 tiny portions of amazing food than platefuls of crappy food. But I'm not someone with a very large appetite lol. Buffets are a waste on me. I could never finish one full plate.


----------



## As'laDain

Andy1001 said:


> I occasionally do some work for the mighty Disney corporation and once when we had finished a job a few of us were invited to a restaurant near Disney called Victoria and Alberts.It is in one of the Disney owned hotels in Florida.There was ten courses as far as I remember and with wine pairing it was about $250 each,without gratuity.I don't drink wine but for all you got in the glass it didn't make much difference.
> The food was delicious but the portions were tiny and for the money it was a rip off.


that is generally how i feel about most expensive restaurants. hence why i like backwoods local independents. 

if you are ever in Lowake, Texas, go to the Lowake Steak House. they raise and slaughter their own cows, their prices are a whole lot cheaper than most steakhouses, their steak tastes better, and their portions are absolutely insane. the KC for one is a one inch thick steak that covers an entire plate! if i remember correctly, it was only like 16 bucks and came with a baked potato. 32 ounce beers on tap for about 6 bucks. 

best steak EVER!


----------



## As'laDain

Celes said:


> I would rather have 10 tiny portions of amazing food than platefuls of crappy food. But I'm not someone with a very large appetite lol. Buffets are a waste on me. I could never finish one full plate.


im just the opposite. i grew up extremely poor and often hungry. 

when i eat at a restaurant, i want to walk away FULL. the food has to be incredibly bad for me to turn my nose up at it.


----------



## pattyreed2011

He should be able to be himself and you too. Stop being pretentious. 

Sent from my LGMS330 using Tapatalk


----------



## Fozzy

Some of my best early dates with my wife were a a small local Chinese buffet. Of course we were both poor as dirt. It hit two points for us--we both liked it, and it was small and quiet. Golden Corral is almost always obnoxiously loud, whether you like the food or not (I do like some of it--I pig out on the baked fish). It's a poor choice for a date because of the noise level and atmosphere, not because of the price or style of food.


----------



## Evinrude58

But...... Is the fact that it's a poor choice really a reason for a last minute cancel?

OP is looking to be dazzled right now. Nothing wrong with that. 
If she's attractive, she'll find plenty of men who will gladly satisfy her needs. 

It was a bad choice of restaurant. OP kinda made me feel bad for the guy, since I'm no wealthy high class stud myself. And I hate rudeness. 

Thing is, she likely had a gut sense about the guy and likely used the restaurant choice as an excuse to bail at the last minute. But the way I took her post to begin with made it sound like she was a snobby princess which kinda tickled the grouchy lobe of my feeble brain.


----------



## Fozzy

Evinrude58 said:


> *But...... Is the fact that it's a poor choice really a reason for a last minute cancel?*
> 
> OP is looking to be dazzled right now. Nothing wrong with that.
> If she's attractive, she'll find plenty of men who will gladly satisfy her needs.
> 
> It was a bad choice of restaurant. OP kinda made me feel bad for the guy, since I'm no wealthy high class stud myself. And I hate rudeness.
> 
> Thing is, she likely had a gut sense about the guy and likely used the restaurant choice as an excuse to bail at the last minute. But the way I took her post to begin with made it sound like she was a snobby princess which kinda tickled the grouchy lobe of my feeble brain.


Welll...kinda....maybe.

It does speak to how much thought the guy is putting into first impressions. I don't think money has to play into it. As several folks here have pointed out, a coffee date would have served the purpose just as well (probably for less money) and put forth a better first impression. You don't have to break the bank to impress, as long as you have some forethought and personality.


----------



## Celes

Evinrude58 said:


> But...... Is the fact that it's a poor choice really a reason for a last minute cancel?


Yes. Any reason a person has for not wanting to go is a good reason not to. No one is entitled to a date. And everyone has the right to change their mind. If they decided they don't want to go after all, they don't have to. 

They agreed to a date. They didn't sign a contract in blood.


----------



## Evinrude58

Celes said:


> Yes. Any reason a person has for not wanting to go is a good reason not to. No one is entitled to a date. And everyone has the right to change their mind. If they decided they don't want to go after all, they don't have to.
> 
> They agreed to a date. They didn't sign a contract in blood.


They agreed to a date. A person TRIES to keep their word in my part of the country, especially in matters of the heart.
Not saying there can't be a change of mind, just saying which restaurant they go to shouldn't be good enough. If he picks her up in a Ford instead of a Chevrolet, should she spit in his face and walk off?

And to be fair, op didn't specify if she actually signed a contract in blood..... One never knows.


----------



## lucy999

Here's the thing- I would've called it off when he said he "forgot" about a previous commitment and he wanted to reschedule. A no right out of the gate for me. Guess what? There's this cool thing called a calendar. He should've checked it before asking me out.

Having said that, I would've been turned off with the GC idea because I'm not a fan of buffets. But if he didn't know that I obviously wouldn't have held it against him. I would've voiced my preference.

It all goes back to his claim of having forgot about his prior commitment.

Hell, one guy I briefly dated took me to wendys. (Not a first date though-2nd date).Then he joked I could only order from the dollar meal. I laughed my azz off. I thought it was hilarious.


----------



## browser

Evinrude58 said:


> They agreed to a date. A person TRIES to keep their word in my part of the country, especially in matters of the heart.
> Not saying there can't be a change of mind, just saying which restaurant they go to shouldn't be good enough. If he picks her up in a Ford instead of a Chevrolet, should she spit in his face and walk off?
> 
> And to be fair, op didn't specify if she actually signed a contract in blood..... One never knows.


I agree with this line of thinking. Mostly. The reason can be valid, it's just a matter of the timing. 

It's just plain rude to cancel a date at the last minute, especially for a reason that was disclosed DAYS before.

If there's a last minute surprise such as the guy showing up looking like dirt or somehow "not as advertised" she's got good reason to say "no thanks".


----------



## Evinrude58

Agreed on the cancellation due to not thinking abou prior commitments. A date is serious business for old e58. &#55357;&#56843;

Surely op was doubting this guy already, and the GC choice put her over the edge. Last minute is really hurtful to me, though. Like LAST minute, the way OP put it.....


----------



## Chuck71

My first "real date" with my XW was at Taco Bell. It was late and none of the restaurants were still open. We had went hiking in the mountains. LOL Right before we ordered she asked, "Are you gonna let me eat?" I busted a gut laughing. Our eyes goo goo'd over hard shell tacos. That was the woman I married..... near the end, 110% different. Way it goes....


----------



## *Deidre*

One of my friends has stated online dating, and he just meets women for a drink. He says if the conversation goes well, then he'll ask her to dinner that night, like they'll go find a restaurant they agree on. He feels if there's no chemistry or the whole conversation when having drinks is awkward, he'll say he has to be somewhere else that night. To me, that is a classy way to get to know someone, and why should he spend a bunch of money on a fancy dinner to impress a stranger? 

My fiance and I had a friendship first, for a few years, but he still wanted to impress me when we went out on our first official date, but Idk, it was different. If I were online dating, I wouldn't want a stranger to spend a ton of money on me and then we have a terrible first date, and he's out that money. 

This is what dating is for though, if Golden Corral was a turn off, then just say you're busy. And don't have anymore contact. Just like he doesn't owe you a more expensive dinner, you don't owe him a date just because he asked.


----------



## john117

Chuck71 said:


> My first "real date" with my XW was at Taco Bell. It was late and none of the restaurants were still open. We had went hiking in the mountains. LOL Right before we ordered she asked, "Are you gonna let me eat?" I busted a gut laughing. Our eyes goo goo'd over hard shell tacos. That was the woman I married..... near the end, 110% different. Way it goes....


Identical except at Popeye Fried Chicken for us.... After long hours at the university computer center... Thirty five years later, preparing for exit.... Such is life. 

Sent from my Moto G (4) using Tapatalk


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## AVR1962

MSalmoides said:


> Heh you bullet dodger!


LOL!!!! Trusted my gut and it paid off


----------



## AVR1962

Evinrude58 said:


> But...... Is the fact that it's a poor choice really a reason for a last minute cancel?
> 
> OP is looking to be dazzled right now. Nothing wrong with that.
> If she's attractive, she'll find plenty of men who will gladly satisfy her needs.
> 
> It was a bad choice of restaurant. OP kinda made me feel bad for the guy, since I'm no wealthy high class stud myself. And I hate rudeness.
> 
> Thing is, she likely had a gut sense about the guy and likely used the restaurant choice as an excuse to bail at the last minute. But the way I took her post to begin with made it sound like she was a snobby princess which kinda tickled the grouchy lobe of my feeble brain.


Evinrude58, there was more to this than just the selection of the Golden Corral. The original date to go out was set on Friday. On Wed I received a text asking if we could change it to Sun because he forgot that he had a fundraiser to attend. Okay, I understand forgetfulness but I felt it would have been more appropriate that he tell me about the fundraising and ask me to attend with him rather than ask to switch days, reason being is it looks like perhaps he made another offer to someone for the same night. I told him I could meet earlier on Sunday for coffee/tea. Thurs he replies back asking me if I could meet him that night for dinner. To me the man is either very wishy washy or he is a control freak, an awful lot of mind changing and I am supposed to keep up? I was actually wondering if he really wanted to go out. After I cancelled he contacted the leader of our singles group we belong to and told her I cancelled a date with him. WTF? I knew then that I had trusted a hunch about this man. You can be a very good person and love Golden Corral and there is nothing wrong with having limited resources. I have worked hard all my life so I do get it but there was too much I was not comfortable with and mention of the Golden Corral for me was like putting icing on that bad feeling.


----------



## SimplyAmorous

As'laDain said:


> im just the opposite. i grew up extremely poor and often hungry.
> 
> when i eat at a restaurant, i want to walk away FULL. the food has to be incredibly bad for me to turn my nose up at it.


I grew up with not being given lunch money for school and having my step mother put notes on the fridge to keep my f***ing hands off ...I can't say we were poor.. she was just very mean to me.... I would get yelled at for eating an apple out of the fridge, like an interrogation ... (I came across a old love letter I wrote to my husband ranting about this not long ago - things I had long forgotten)... he remembers the notes on the fridge.. 

This surely plays a part in being more thankful for the little things..I wouldn't even be able to name a restaurant that I'd frown on going to... the only thing that'd come to mind is.. I hate going where it's packed, wouldn't want to wait in any lines to sit down.... and bars have little appeal to me.. unless they are a higher class bar with a section for eating - away from the pool table area , lined with the regulars on their bar stools chugging it down...


----------



## Evinrude58

AVR1962 said:


> Evinrude58, there was more to this than just the selection of the Golden Corral. The original date to go out was set on Friday. On Wed I received a text asking if we could change it to Sun because he forgot that he had a fundraiser to attend. Okay, I understand forgetfulness but I felt it would have been more appropriate that he tell me about the fundraising and ask me to attend with him rather than ask to switch days, reason being is it looks like perhaps he made another offer to someone for the same night. I told him I could meet earlier on Sunday for coffee/tea. Thurs he replies back asking me if I could meet him that night for dinner. To me the man is either very wishy washy or he is a control freak, an awful lot of mind changing and I am supposed to keep up? I was actually wondering if he really wanted to go out. After I cancelled he contacted the leader of our singles group we belong to and told her I cancelled a date with him. WTF? I knew then that I had trusted a hunch about this man. You can be a very good person and love Golden Corral and there is nothing wrong with having limited resources. I have worked hard all my life so I do get it but there was too much I was not comfortable with and mention of the Golden Corral for me was like putting icing on that bad feeling.


That makes sense. The more I thought about it, the more I realized there was likely more to this story than Golden Corral. 

I have to admit, my gf hates Golden Corral, although I'm good with some of 'Em. Some are awful.


----------



## SimplyAmorous

AVR1962 said:


> Evinrude58, there was more to this than just the selection of the Golden Corral. The original date to go out was set on Friday. On Wed I received a text asking if we could change it to Sun because he forgot that he had a fundraiser to attend. Okay, I understand forgetfulness *but I felt it would have been more appropriate that he tell me about the fundraising and ask me to attend with him rather than ask to switch days,* reason being is it looks like perhaps he made another offer to someone for the same night.


 Ok.. just curious.. as communication is everything...(things not said easily = wrong assumptions) by any chance.. did you say you could "go with him" - and if so.. how he he respond? Just thinking about this.. it may not have entered his brain a woman would want to go to a Fundraiser with him.. over a sit down eating out date.... 

His being forgetful with his own schedule.. small strike #1 ...



> I told him I could meet earlier on Sunday for coffee/tea. Thurs he replies back asking me if I could meet him that night for dinner. To me the man is either very wishy washy or he is a control freak, an awful lot of mind changing and I am supposed to keep up?


 So you let him know when you were available (Sunday) then the next Text is "spur of the moment" for dinner.. is this all that awful ?? 

Maybe a personalty difference .... he is more of a free spirit type.. get a moment...figuring it doesn't hurt to ask,why wait till Sunday... and you are more of a planner.. feeling "I said Sunday.. what is wrong with you?"... 

I wouldn't call him a control freak, at least he was answering & giving opportunities, an earlier one even... 



> I was actually wondering if he really wanted to go out.


 I haven't dated in a lifetime.. but most people seem to just "GHOST" each other, it's pretty acceptable even....he WAS communicating and giving opportunities.. not sure why you felt this way...??



> After I cancelled he contacted the leader of our singles group we belong to and told her I cancelled a date with him. WTF?


 I am sure he felt as confused as you on this one... I don't know.. sounds like he gave it a good try... he screwed up with the Fundraiser handling... then when you asked him to pick a place to meet... he did a lousy pick ... 

The singles group leader...that seems more the icing on the cake... I am thinking his feelings are also a :wtf: and that's why he did that.. 

Lesson for the Golden Corral guy... 1st impressions are THAT important !


----------



## MJJEAN

Evinrude58 said:


> They agreed to a date. A person TRIES to keep their word in my part of the country, especially in matters of the heart.
> Not saying there can't be a change of mind, just saying which restaurant they go to shouldn't be good enough. * If he picks her up in a Ford instead of a Chevrolet, should she spit in his face and walk off?
> *
> And to be fair, op didn't specify if she actually signed a contract in blood..... One never knows.


You are clearly not from the Detroit area. In the Motor City and surrounds, Chevy people do NOT date Ford people. :nono:

I don't know about CG where you have been, but the ones here are terribad. My sister has 6 kids, so guess where they want to meet when they're in the area? It's painful.

- Very crowded
- Not clean at all
- The food is not good
- The employees are few and surly 
- Half the customers seem to be the kind of people who bathe once a month whether they need it or not and the other half have apparently rolled in vats of their favorite colognes. 
-The tables are so close that you can't eat without being constantly bumped. 
- If you go on a Friday or Saturday you are guaranteed to see some chick throw a plate at her SO and storm out. 
- A fist fight breaking out between at least two men at the buffet or by the door is a good possibility. 
- The restrooms are usually so bad it's better to hold it if you can and go to the gas station down the street. 
- And everything in the place has been recently licked and/otherwise fondled by the 500 kids running around like they just read Lord of the Flies. 

Take me to a bar with music, a fair, a festival, a Coney place, a museum or cider mill. Take me to one of any Chili's, On the Boarder, or Outback Steakhouse locations. Hell, take me to a friends backyard grill and disc golf gathering. Take me fishing, shooting, or have me act as an extra in your friends zombie movie (did that, btw). Take me anywhere but Golden Corral.


----------



## uhtred

GC seems such a strange choice for a first date, that it might have been worth it to go just out of curiosity. Maybe he owns the restaurant chain.....

That said, if I were dating, I'd pick someplace interesting, fairly quiet, and fairly inexpensive. (probably some interesting ethnic place - after checking for food preferences).


----------



## Blondilocks

Oh, no! He called the leader of the singles group - you're gonna get in trouble (yeah, right). What a child.


----------



## 225985

MJJEAN said:


> You are clearly not from the Detroit area. In the Motor City and surrounds, Chevy people do NOT date Ford people. :nono:
> 
> 
> 
> I don't know about CG where you have been, but the ones here are terribad. My sister has 6 kids, so guess where they want to meet when they're in the area? It's painful.
> 
> 
> 
> - Very crowded
> 
> - Not clean at all
> 
> - The food is not good
> 
> - The employees are few and surly
> 
> - Half the customers seem to be the kind of people who bathe once a month whether they need it or not and the other half have apparently rolled in vats of their favorite colognes.
> 
> -The tables are so close that you can't eat without being constantly bumped.
> 
> - If you go on a Friday or Saturday you are guaranteed to see some chick throw a plate at her SO and storm out.
> 
> - A fist fight breaking out between at least two men at the buffet or by the door is a good possibility.
> 
> - The restrooms are usually so bad it's better to hold it if you can and go to the gas station down the street.
> 
> - And everything in the place has been recently licked and/otherwise fondled by the 500 kids running around like they just read Lord of the Flies.
> 
> 
> 
> Take me to a bar with music, a fair, a festival, a Coney place, a museum or cider mill. Take me to one of any Chili's, On the Boarder, or Outback Steakhouse locations. Hell, take me to a friends backyard grill and disc golf gathering. Take me fishing, shooting, or have me act as an extra in your friends zombie movie (did that, btw). Take me anywhere but Golden Corral.




Which zombie movie?


----------



## Blondilocks

No one mentioned a bowling alley? How come? There's one in a mall a couple miles away that actually has pretty good food! I was sure surprised.


----------



## *Deidre*

AVR1962 said:


> Evinrude58, there was more to this than just the selection of the Golden Corral. The original date to go out was set on Friday. On Wed I received a text asking if we could change it to Sun because he forgot that he had a fundraiser to attend. Okay, I understand forgetfulness but I felt it would have been more appropriate that he tell me about the fundraising and ask me to attend with him rather than ask to switch days, reason being is it looks like perhaps he made another offer to someone for the same night. I told him I could meet earlier on Sunday for coffee/tea. Thurs he replies back asking me if I could meet him that night for dinner. To me the man is either very wishy washy or he is a control freak, an awful lot of mind changing and I am supposed to keep up? I was actually wondering if he really wanted to go out. After I cancelled he contacted the leader of our singles group we belong to and told her I cancelled a date with him. WTF? I knew then that I had trusted a hunch about this man. You can be a very good person and love Golden Corral and there is nothing wrong with having limited resources. I have worked hard all my life so I do get it but there was too much I was not comfortable with and mention of the Golden Corral for me was like putting icing on that bad feeling.


Have you blocked his number yet? lol If not, that might be a good idea.


----------



## AVR1962

blondilocks said:


> oh, no! He called the leader of the singles group - you're gonna get in trouble (yeah, right). What a child.


exactly!!!!!!


----------



## AVR1962

*Deidre* said:


> Have you blocked his number yet? lol If not, that might be a good idea.


I sure did!!! As soon as I found out he contacted the leader of the singles group.


----------



## 225985

AVR1962 said:


> exactly!!!!!!




Do you know the exact conversation? 

The leader may have asked about the date. 

Or he called to maybe ask her why he is not having success with dating. Maybe the leader is going with him to the fundraiser, as a friend only. 

Did he really call to snitch or is that your interpretation? 

It is easy to draw wrong conclusions when you only have pieces of information. Our minds fill in the gaps the way we want to see them.


----------



## *Deidre*

blueinbr said:


> Do you know the exacted conversation?
> 
> The leader may have asked about the date.
> 
> Or he called to maybe ask her why he is not having success with dating. Maybe the leader is going with him to the fundraiser, as a friend only.
> 
> Did he really call to snitch or is that your interpretation?
> 
> It is easy to draw wrong conclusions when you only have pieces of information. Our minds fill in the gaps the way we want to see them.


Way too much drama for barely knowing her.


----------



## heartsbeating

I agree with SA about having direct communication with him. As well as the above comment of too much drama before anything has even begun!

It reminded me when a girlfriend I was visiting earlier this year, had arranged with a guy she was crushing on (and he was showing mutual signals) to come out to dinner with us while we'd all be in town. He had said he'd be there Saturday night and to let him know the plans. She confirmed with him again the day before, he was all good. She was looking forward to seeing him, sent him the details of a tapas bar with good reputation where we'd be. He cancelled last minute. Had another date! She was disappointed but instead of communicating that, she just went cold. That lasted months until she finally answered his call and told him how she felt. I think she deserved better. I also think she could have told him straight to not play her like that... even as a friend instead of avoidance. Her and I enjoyed a fantastic meal together and a fun night nonetheless!

Maybe he didn't like tapas.


----------



## Buffon06

Many years ago, while driving through West Virginia, and not finding any places to stop and eat, we decided to stop at a place outside of Martinsville called the "Golden Steer". It was a "Golden Corral" rip-off (imagine that!). The food was horrible, we couldn't even find something fresh at the salad bar. And the crowd...

I will never step foot in one of those places ever again, I think I would rather go hungry than risk food poisoning, hepatitis, or worse!


----------



## Evinrude58

Just because I wipe my nose and fondle the strawberries somewhat while searching for good ones, you guys want to get all butt-hurt over it........

Golden Corral is awesome. One just has to take a small taste of everything there with the same spoon to find the good stuff. At least, that's what I do.
I like to secretly put food back that I've decided I didn't like, because I don't like to waste it. I think it helps the owner keep a profit. 

A few germs never hurt anybody.



After all this, I don't even think I want to go back to golden corral. You guys have ruined it for me. Now I'll be paranoid about every chocolate fountain and entree having germs.....

What a bad day.....


----------



## AVR1962

blueinbr said:


> Do you know the exact conversation?
> 
> The leader may have asked about the date.
> 
> Or he called to maybe ask her why he is not having success with dating. Maybe the leader is going with him to the fundraiser, as a friend only.
> 
> Did he really call to snitch or is that your interpretation?
> 
> It is easy to draw wrong conclusions when you only have pieces of information. Our minds fill in the gaps the way we want to see them.


She is a friend of mine, and she called me about him contacting her and told me the conversation they had. To me this was terribly inmature on his part. How does this benefit him? And why would he contact her to tell her I cancelled when he was the one that changed the date 3 times? Sorry, something is not not here. Even my friend, the group leader, had her concerns.


----------



## AVR1962

*Deidre* said:


> Way too much drama for barely knowing her.


Have you ever heard of narcissistic hovering?? That is what this reminded me of. All about control.


----------



## AVR1962

Evinrude58 said:


> Just because I wipe my nose and fondle the strawberries somewhat while searching for good ones, you guys want to get all butt-hurt over it........
> 
> Golden Corral is awesome. One just has to take a small taste of everything there with the same spoon to find the good stuff. At least, that's what I do.
> I like to secretly put food back that I've decided I didn't like, because I don't like to waste it. I think it helps the owner keep a profit.
> 
> A few germs never hurt anybody.
> 
> 
> 
> After all this, I don't even think I want to go back to golden corral. You guys have ruined it for me. Now I'll be paranoid about every chocolate fountain and entree having germs.....
> 
> What a bad day.....


LOL!!!! It is cold season now too. Let's not forget all the people who can't hold that cough long enough and have coughed their lovely germs all over that yummy food!!! :wink2:


----------



## josephddiazz

Do you think that you're judging a bit too quickly? Maybe he was testing you.


----------



## MrsHolland

josephddiazz said:


> Do you think that you're judging a bit too quickly? Maybe he was testing you.


A few posters have said this. What on Earth could he be testing? To see if she likes cheap, nasty restaurants so he knows she will be a cheap date? To see if she has low standards so he will not have to go outside his low level comfort zone?

If a guy is having to "test" a woman he is not a man worth giving any time to.


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## 225985

Ok AVR, we are anxiously awaiting your next date with a different guy.


----------



## 225985

AVR1962 said:


> LOL!!!! It is cold season now too. Let's not forget all the people who can't hold that cough long enough and have coughed their lovely germs all over that yummy food!!! :wink2:




Mrs Blue and I took a Carnival cruise. We were at the pool topside, buy the food area. I saw this young boy get out. Snot on his face. He wiped his nose with his hand. Now the snot was on his hand. I watch him wipe his hand on the soft service ice cream handle to get the snot off.



Germs are EVERYWHERE. Do you think the people in the kitchen in a sit down restaurant are not scratching their nose and other parts, then preparing your food?



The worst offending germ sources for me are the pen at the doctor's office that all the sick people touch to sign in. Or the pen at the voting booth that hundreds of people touch.



I use my own pen.


----------



## tropicalbeachiwish

During a vacation at an all-inclusive resort in the Bahamas, my husband witnessed 2 teenagers put their finger in a chocolate fountain, lick it, then put it back in. Repeatedly. I avoided that fountain. I carry hand sanitizer with me and use it alot! 

Sent from my SM-G930V using Tapatalk


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## Evinrude58

blueinbr said:


> Mrs Blue and I took a Carnival cruise. We were at the pool topside, buy the food area. I saw this young boy get out. Snot on his face. He wiped his nose with his hand. Now the snot was on his hand. I watch him wipe his hand on the soft service ice cream handle to get the snot off.
> 
> 
> 
> Germs are EVERYWHERE. Do you think the people in the kitchen in a sit down restaurant are not scratching their nose and other parts, then preparing your food?
> 
> 
> 
> The worst offending germ sources for me are the pen at the doctor's office that all the sick people touch to sign in. Or the pen at the voting booth that hundreds of people touch.
> 
> 
> 
> I use my own pen.


So blue, are you saying you still had an ice cone? Lol


----------



## AVR1962

blueinbr said:


> Ok AVR, we are anxiously awaiting your next date with a different guy.


You and me both!!!! I have not been out since my divorce.


----------



## 225985

AVR1962 said:


> You and me both!!!! I have not been out since my divorce.




That's very selfish of you depriving men of your hotness.


----------



## MJJEAN

blueinbr said:


> Which zombie movie?


Little film school project released only on Youtube as far as I know. It's been years. I can go dig up the name from a friends FB feed or even PM you or post here a couple pics of the afternoon.

They used syrup and food coloring for blood. I had to be literally hosed off outside before I could get in the car. The syrup and coloring stained what I was wearing down to the underthings and I had to throw the outfit away, but it was soooo much fun!


----------



## heartsbeating

AVR1962 said:


> You and me both!!!! I have not been out since my divorce.


Hold out for garlic naan.


----------



## Blondilocks

MJJEAN said:


> Little film school project released only on Youtube as far as I know. It's been years. I can go dig up the name from a friends FB feed or even PM you or post here a couple pics of the afternoon.
> 
> They used syrup and food coloring for blood. I had to be literally hosed off outside before I could get in the car. The syrup and coloring stained what I was wearing down to the underthings and I had to throw the outfit away, but it was soooo much fun!


Too bad they didn't combine the filming with your family reunion. Man, I'd pay to see that.>


----------



## MJJEAN

Blondilocks said:


> Too bad they didn't combine the filming with your family reunion. Man, I'd pay to see that.>


Think what the guys could have saved on fake blood!


----------



## coupdegrace

The way I see it, he clearly didn't put forth much thought into this first date. Every Golden Corral I've ever been to has been an unsanitary dump with flies and gnats hovering about, screaming children and filthy tables. I wouldn't take my dog to eat at Golden Corral. 

While not exactly upper-class, he could have suggested Mimi's Café, Chili's or Applebee's with that same budget... and why not suggest a matinee movie if he's strapped for cash? That would certainly be more quiet and intimate. 

For first dates, I would always inquire the lady's interests and hobbies before-hand and then make suggestions. I've had first dates at Santa Cruz boardwalk, Golfland, and an NBA Basketball game from doing simple recon, which was less than the cost of a $14 buffet that will give you mud butt in 3 hours flat. This was poor preparation on his part that ultimately bit him in the backside.


----------



## 225985

GC is opening a new restaurant near my house. I am going to go there to watch all the couples on first dates.


----------



## CharlieParker

blueinbr said:


> GC is opening a new restaurant near my house. I am going to go there to watch all the couples on first dates.


Coupon?


----------



## AVR1962

blueinbr said:


> GC is opening a new restaurant near my house. I am going to go there to watch all the couples on first dates.


LOL, you are one luck duck.....Golden Corrall.....I didn't realize they were still putting them in places!!!

Update on my situation......I did apologize to the guy. He understood. I probably should have addressed the situation better.

I have since been on 4 dates, none of them chose Golden Corrall, LOL!!! 

I can say it feels really nice to have the interest of men who have shown such consideration for me. I am talking to a man now that is a real gentleman. He makes sure I go thru the doorway first, he picked up the dinner bill, he chose the place which was nice, he calls on a regular basis, he is educated, good looking, can express himself. A far cry from the years with my ex, the passive-aggressive narcissistic, porn addicted drunk that he was/is.


----------



## 225985

Did you have any second dates with one of the four men?


----------



## AVR1962

blueinbr said:


> Did you have any second dates with one of the four men?


Yes, I went out dancing last night as a second date with one of the gentlemen....7 years younger, trim, attractive. We had a real good time. I have not been on the dance floor in 24 years so I was a bit nervous at first but it was a fun night. I am not getting serious or am committed myself to anyone right now. I am enjoying life, enjoying the attention without commitment. I can say I love the attention, love the compliments and do still have thoughts that I wished my ex could have been as giving with his words. He was so detached and here these men I hardly know are holding my arm to guide me thru doors and telling me I am beautiful. I have had such good conversations with these men as well. My ex did not engage so my new life has been like a breath of fresh air!!!!


----------



## AVR1962

UPDATE: Had to share this!!! The man I decided not to go out on a first date with, the guy that invited me to the Golden Corral, is now married. I saw pics of him with his new bride, she is beautiful!!! I was rather shocked! Perhaps mail order ;-)! He wasted no time...he asked me out in Dec and he married in May...and I dated a dentist that went nowhere for 7 months....hum, something is wrong with this picture!!!!!


----------



## Talker67

AVR1962 said:


> So here is the situation.....a guy asks you to dinner, you agree and you tell him to pick the place and you tell him you can be there at ____ time. He texts you with the address for Golden Corral. After laughing hysterically and standing there is total bewilderment, what do you do? Go ahead with plans? *What kind of a guy chooses Golden Corral for a first date*?


A hungry guy!

I would def go! Isn't that the place with the flowing chocolate fountain of bliss?


----------



## Works

Ha!! Golden Corral. There's a name from the past. 

I bet I have you beat, my now husband took me to Pizza Hut on our first date. His friends wife worked there, and she didn't even give him a discount. He thought at the least she would comp the garlic bread.


----------



## Rocky Mountain Yeti

My wife and I had our first date at Dairy Queen. We're now together over thirty years.

Of course, at the time I was a starving college student who literally had to save change for weeks to get enough scratch for even the simplest of dates, so context may be important here.


----------



## AVR1962

Talker67 said:


> A hungry guy!
> 
> I would def go! Isn't that the place with the flowing chocolate fountain of bliss?


This is a post from Dec, read "UPDATE"


----------



## CharlieParker

AVR1962 said:


> UPDATE: Had to share this!!! The man I decided not to go out on a first date with, the guy that invited me to the Golden Corral, is now married. I saw pics of him with his new bride, she is beautiful!!! I was rather shocked! Perhaps mail order ;-)! He wasted no time...he asked me out in Dec and he married in May...and I dated a dentist that went nowhere for 7 months....hum, something is wrong with this picture!!!!!


I think you probably got lucky not going out with GC guy. 

And, sorry about the dentist, 7 months, that bites.


----------



## aine

It's just a evening out at Gold Corral ( I had to look that up) it's not like he asking you to marry him. He could be just playing with you to see how you would react. AVR did you meet him? Did I miss that part?


----------



## knobcreek

Dating is different now, there's not even the assumption of exclusivity or a dating future. People are dating 5-10 people at a time so taking women to expensive places on a first date isn't worth it. Golden Corral is a little off-putting but I would likely meet at a coffee shop or maybe sushi for lunch or something. No way I would be gearing up to take a woman out to a $150 dinner knowing she likely has two more dates that week with other guys.


----------



## Mr The Other

knobcreek said:


> Dating is different now, there's not even the assumption of exclusivity or a dating future. People are dating 5-10 people at a time so taking women to expensive places on a first date isn't worth it. Golden Corral is a little off-putting but I would likely meet at a coffee shop or maybe sushi for lunch or something. No way I would be gearing up to take a woman out to a $150 dinner knowing she likely has two more dates that week with other guys.


5-10!

I am not shocked, I am impressed by the stamina. I get up to three and found it too physically demanding.


----------



## SlowlyGoingCrazy

I never multi-dated or dated anyone who was multi-dating. 

But I'd love a cheap buffet date. I'd freak him out with how many jello cubes I can eat. Though being stuffed doesn't much lead to feeling like being stuffed later on that night so I usually just did coffee first date or somewhere cheap. I don't need impressing with money, being frugal is more of a turn on for me than spending.


----------



## uhtred

If I were dating, I would avoid super expensive places not to save money but because I don't think showing off money is a good way to behave. I'd take a date somewhere I enjoyed, somewhere I was comfortable going, but also interesting. 

I could take someone to Chez Expensiv but what is the point if I don't normally eat at places like that. I normally eat at interesting ethnic places - Thai, Mexican, Turkish, etc so that is where I would take them. To me the point of a date is not trying to "sell" a false image of yourself, but rather to have fun, and to give your date an idea of what you are really like so that you can see if a longer term relationship makes sense.




knobcreek said:


> Dating is different now, there's not even the assumption of exclusivity or a dating future. People are dating 5-10 people at a time so taking women to expensive places on a first date isn't worth it. Golden Corral is a little off-putting but I would likely meet at a coffee shop or maybe sushi for lunch or something. No way I would be gearing up to take a woman out to a $150 dinner knowing she likely has two more dates that week with other guys.


----------



## Mr The Other

uhtred said:


> If I were dating, I would avoid super expensive places not to save money but because I don't think showing off money is a good way to behave. I'd take a date somewhere I enjoyed, somewhere I was comfortable going, but also interesting.
> 
> I could take someone to Chez Expensiv but what is the point if I don't normally eat at places like that. I normally eat at interesting ethnic places - Thai, Mexican, Turkish, etc so that is where I would take them. To me the point of a date is not trying to "sell" a false image of yourself, but rather to have fun, and to give your date an idea of what you are really like so that you can see if a longer term relationship makes sense.


I am fortunate enough to be comfortable, but if the lady has dogs, then dog walking is by far the best first date. You walk together, she is in her element, you are looking forward so silence is not uncomfortable, and you walk closely together. 

In contrast, at a posh meal, she is likely to be slightly stiff, you are staring straight at each other and kept apart.


----------



## Mr The Other

SlowlyGoingCrazy said:


> I never multi-dated or dated anyone who was multi-dating.
> 
> But I'd love a cheap buffet date. I'd freak him out with how many jello cubes I can eat. Though being stuffed doesn't much lead to feeling like being stuffed later on that night so I usually just did coffee first date or somewhere cheap. I don't need impressing with money, being frugal is more of a turn on for me than spending.


Hey! Ms Crazy, I do not mean to make you wet, but I have coupons! 

:grin2:


----------



## john117

AVR1962 said:


> UPDATE: Had to share this!!! The man I decided not to go out on a first date with, the guy that invited me to the Golden Corral, is now married. I saw pics of him with his new bride, she is beautiful!!! I was rather shocked! Perhaps mail order ;-)! He wasted no time...he asked me out in Dec and he married in May...and I dated a dentist that went nowhere for 7 months....hum, something is wrong with this picture!!!!!


Your dental insurance is not too good


----------



## Talker67

so he already got married. Was the wedding reception at the golden coral?


----------



## GusPolinski

AVR1962 said:


> Yes, I went out dancing last night as a second date with one of the gentlemen....7 years younger, trim, attractive. We had a real good time. I have not been on the dance floor in 24 years so I was a bit nervous at first but it was a fun night. I am not getting serious or am committed myself to anyone right now. I am enjoying life, enjoying the attention without commitment. I can say I love the attention, love the compliments and do still have thoughts that I wished my ex could have been as giving with his words. He was so detached and here these men I hardly know are holding my arm to guide me thru doors and telling me I am beautiful. I have had such good conversations with these men as well. My ex did not engage so my new life has been like a breath of fresh air!!!!


Maybe he met her _at_ the Golden Corral!

:lol: :rofl:


----------



## Steve1000

SlowlyGoingCrazy said:


> I never multi-dated or dated anyone who was multi-dating.
> 
> But I'd love a cheap buffet date. I'd freak him out with how many jello cubes I can eat. Though being stuffed doesn't much lead to feeling like being stuffed later on that night so I usually just did coffee first date or somewhere cheap. I don't need impressing with money, being frugal is more of a turn on for me than spending.


I have to ask, how would you have known if people you dated before were multi-dating? When I first met my wife, I had no idea that she was multi-dating.


----------



## samyeagar

Steve1000 said:


> I have to ask, how would you have known if people you dated before were multi-dating? When I first met my wife, I had no idea that she was multi-dating.


If I had to venture a guess, I'd say she, well, asked them?


----------



## SlowlyGoingCrazy

Steve1000 said:


> I have to ask, how would you have known if people you dated before were multi-dating? When I first met my wife, I had no idea that she was multi-dating.


I asked and made clear that I was not interested if they were talking to or seeing anyone else. 

I never stayed in the dating part long though. I'd go on a date and we would then want to try to have a relationship or if the date went bad I'd never see them again. 

I never did the date 2, 3,4,5 times before you are "with" someone thing.


----------



## Steve1000

SlowlyGoingCrazy said:


> I asked and made clear that I was not interested if they were talking to or seeing anyone else.
> 
> I never stayed in the dating part long though. I'd go on a date and we would then want to try to have a relationship or if the date went bad I'd never see them again.
> 
> I never did the date 2, 3,4,5 times before you are "with" someone thing.


I think that your way of dating is the right way. It allows you to completely concentrate on one person at a time. That's better for you and more fair to the person you're dating. My main point in my question was that in the early stages of dating, we can never really be certain that the other person is not multi-dating. Players often don't admit that they're playing. Dang it, now I have a Stevie Nicks song in my head.


----------



## Rowan

Steve1000 said:


> I think that your way of dating is the right way. It allows you to completely concentrate on one person at a time. That's better for you and more fair to the person you're dating. My main point in my question was that in the early stages of dating, we can never really be certain that the other person is not multi-dating. Players often don't admit that they're playing. *Dang it, now I have a Stevie Nicks song in my head.*


I've got a fix for that. 

She _blinded_ me with _science_! 

You're welcome.


----------



## Rocky Mountain Yeti

Steve1000 said:


> I think that your way of dating is the right way. It allows you to completely concentrate on one person at a time. That's better for you and more fair to the person you're dating. My main point in my question was that in the early stages of dating, we can never really be certain that the other person is not multi-dating. Players often don't admit that they're playing. Dang it, now I have a Stevie Nicks song in my head.


That was my thought process as well. 

When I was dating my wife, one evening I suggested seeing a movie and she was cool. Then I suggested a particular movie and she declined, which surprised me because I though she had mentioned the trailer looked funny when we saw an ad for it on TV.

We'd already seen anything else we might be interested in at the time, so we just ended up hanging out.

After we were engaged, I learned she didn't want to see that movie because she had seen it a few nights earlier with another guy.

Even though I was serious, we had never talked about exclusivity, so I didn't hold it against her. It was a little disconcerting that she wasn't as serious about me as I was about her, but that's what happens when you fail to communicate.


----------



## SlowlyGoingCrazy

Steve1000 said:


> I think that your way of dating is the right way. It allows you to completely concentrate on one person at a time. That's better for you and more fair to the person you're dating. My main point in my question was that in the early stages of dating, we can never really be certain that the other person is not multi-dating. Players often don't admit that they're playing. Dang it, now I have a Stevie Nicks song in my head.


Yep I can only focus on one person at a time. Even at the talking stage. I like to put my all into one and then if it doesn't work out, find another to put my all into. Typically the guys I talked to were wanting the same thing in their dates so it was a mutual thing. 

I couldn't be sure and they could have lied but I guess I got lucky or at least didn't find out about it. My bf now I know for sure wasn't so the rest I don't care about. If they did, they did. 

And that song is in my head now too.


----------



## Steve1000

Rowan said:


> I've got a fix for that.
> 
> She _blinded_ me with _science_!
> 
> You're welcome.


You know, having a Stevie Nicks song and a Thomas Dolby song in my head at the same time is really uncomfortable... :| They just don't mix well.


----------



## Rubix Cubed

CharlieParker said:


> I think you probably got lucky not going out with GC guy.
> 
> And, sorry about the dentist, 7 months, that bites.


Dentist ..............Bites.:laugh::laugh::laugh:


----------



## Rocky Mountain Yeti

Rubix Cubed said:


> Dentist ..............Bites.:laugh::laugh::laugh:


I'll bet he really made an impression


----------



## AVR1962

You guys all gave me a great chuckle with your responses!!! Too funny!


----------



## AVR1962

CharlieParker said:


> I think you probably got lucky not going out with GC guy.
> 
> And, sorry about the dentist, 7 months, that bites.


I agree, the GC buffet man would have been my first date since my divorce and I don't think I was ready looking back and very thankful I did not go. I went out with a few other men before I dated the dentist, and yes, totally stinks to have had such a wonderful connection and for it to be gone but again looking at the positive side. I spent 27 years with my ex and dating now is very different. I have never been one to date more than one at a time but right now I am communicating with a few. Keeping my options open.


----------



## ButtPunch

I wouldn't want to take a woman to Golden Corral on a first date. 

Not a good idea to let some poor woman watch me eat myself sick.


----------



## Talker67

it seems like the height of arrogance to just assume someone you just started dating will not every data another person! I mean, come on....its not like you are engaged!


----------



## SlowlyGoingCrazy

ButtPunch said:


> I wouldn't want to take a woman to Golden Corral on a first date.
> 
> Not a good idea to let some poor woman watch me eat myself sick.


This would be my problem too lol 

I typically eat moderate portions and make good choices but as soon as I step into a buffet I have the intense need to eat as much as humanly possible to get my money's worth. 
It's not pretty. Certainly not the first impression I want to make.


----------



## Fozzy

SlowlyGoingCrazy said:


> This would be my problem too lol
> 
> I typically eat moderate portions and make good choices but as soon as I step into a buffet I have the intense need to eat as much as humanly possible to get my money's worth.
> It's not pretty. Certainly not the first impression I want to make.


It's not just quantity, it's the relative expense of the food you're loading on your plate. Skip the pasta, chicken and potatos.

I'm the guy standing at the Prime Rib station. The guy puts a slice on my plate and I don't move. Just stare at him until he starts loading your plate.


----------



## Handy

I am not a picky eater. I am retired and several places offer senior discounts or deals. I worked 5 days for a friend that has a small repair business while he was on vacation. Taco Bell is close to the shop and the menu has some of the lower calorie meals for fast food. I buy the 3 tostados and a drink all for $3.00, so my total expenditures for 5 meals was $15.00.

I admit to pigging out at some buffets so I quit going to most. I do go to Pizza Ranch from 2PM until 4PM occasionally because the senior special is $7.00. They have the best chicken and I like the salad bar, plus the soft ice cream is a good finish to a great meal.

To me if someone objects to the Golden Corral I have to ask, would you go there with a relative, co-worker, friend, or neighbor? If no, then that is a general life style choice. If you would go with the list in the above line but not a date, consider being more flexible and come down off your high horse.

I will say if I asked a woman on a first date, I would probably pick Applebee's. 

I read a dating blog and one guy claims he spends $500 a month on on dating multiple women. He is also married.


----------



## Lila

uhtred said:


> I could take someone to Chez Expensiv but what is the point if I don't normally eat at places like that. I normally eat at interesting ethnic places - Thai, Mexican, Turkish, etc so that is where I would take them. *To me the point of a date is not trying to "sell" a false image of yourself, but rather to have fun, and to give your date an idea of what you are really like so that you can see if a longer term relationship makes sense*.


Bingo!!!! 

Avr, I think you did the right thing by passing on Golden Corral guy. I would have done the same thing were I in your shoes. Nothing wrong with Golden Corral or Chez Expens (great term Uhtred) but if the whole point of dating is to find a compatible partner, then doing something completely against your personality or character is just starting off the relationship on a lie. 

FWIW, I wouldn't have gone on the Golden Corral date either. I can't stand buffets. If I'm going to eat out, then it's going to be at a place with excellent service and a full bar 

Sent from my SM-G900V using Tapatalk


----------



## southbound

AVR1962 said:


> So here is the situation.....a guy asks you to dinner, you agree and you tell him to pick the place and you tell him you can be there at ____ time. He texts you with the address for Golden Corral. After laughing hysterically and standing there is total bewilderment, what do you do? Go ahead with plans? What kind of a guy chooses Golden Corral for a first date?


I guess it depends on culture and where you live. Is Golden Coral a joke where you are from? I live in a rural area, and that would be considered perfectly normal where I'm from. Its absolutely fine to not like Golden Coral, but if a woman here acted like it wasn't "good enough" for her, she would viewed as someone with their nose in the air.


----------



## southbound

SimplyAmorous said:


> MSalmoides said:
> 
> 
> 
> SA I get what you're saying. If he's a good guy then not a dealbreaker. I haven't been in the dating scene for years so what do I know?
> 
> I was just thinking about the first date with my wife. We went to a movie house that served pizza and beer at your table, but hey I was 19 and it was walking distance from the campus. If I were to ask a first date today, I have no clue what I'd do so I guess I don't have anything to add LOL.
> 
> ~MS
> 
> Edited to add: Drinking age was 18 in those days.
> 
> 
> 
> Our 1st date was eating meatballs at his house.. we were very young too.. I've never drank.. so drinks have no appeal to me... I've been on another thread here that went on & on & on about if a man used a dang coupon on a 1st date.. personally my own husband wouldn't do that (I asked him) but still this would not be something where I felt .. he's a loser.. he's an idiot.. I would see it as a "conversation piece" about money... I don't see that as such a bad thing on a date...
> 
> Lately I am beginning to feel I just don't belong on this forum.. it seems everyone is high class... can't relate to most people here.. I'd rather go to a nice Chinese buffet... This probably sounds pathetic too...only a loser would suggest that..
> 
> Actually I feel a decent man who really LIKED A WOMAN, wanted to impress...he should ask HER where she wants to go....this has always been what my husband has done.. but Me.. I rarely suggest something expensive.. but now & then we do splurge.. yes.
> 
> I was out today...Golden Corral came up in a conversation by another couple...how they go there...I didn't know they had one in that town...here I was just telling them.. "OH we need to go there!".. ironic..
> 
> I must be hugely deprived or something.. I am very happy to go to these dives ....We go to Red Lobster once or twice a year at the most.. that's my favorite.. I wait till we have coupons.. for us.. that is luxury eating out.. but we do have a pretty large family...I don't think we've ever taken them all with us (yet).
Click to expand...

I'm with you and can relate to your post perfectly. Even though I am happy being single, If I ever meet a single woman that thinks like you do, not just based on this thread but many others too, it would certainly make me consider giving up the single life. Unfortunately, I haven't found another one yet.

I read a lot about going to a coffee shop. To be honest, that's what would get a big laugh for a first date in my neck of the woods.


----------



## AVR1962

southbound said:


> I guess it depends on culture and where you live. Is Golden Coral a joke where you are from? I live in a rural area, and that would be considered perfectly normal where I'm from. Its absolutely fine to not like Golden Coral, but if a woman here acted like it wasn't "good enough" for her, she would viewed as someone with their nose in the air.


At the time I received this invitation I had been in the states for just over a year after living in Europe for over 7 years. Had fantastic restaurants and wonderful food in Europe so just not what I am used to. I think it is all what you are comfortable with and one's association to a place. For me GC is off the list for a place to take a date. It would be like asking someone to go to McDonald's for dinner. Perhaps it should not matter where a person goes but I feel the selection tells a bit about a person and I am not a buffet type of person.


----------



## AVR1962

Handy said:


> I read a dating blog and one guy claims he spends $500 a month on on dating multiple women. He is also married.


Sad! I am not sure what guys get from that except for a thrill, a high (like a drug) that doesn't last. My exes were consumed with chasing other women too. Had either one of them committed to the marriage and put their efforts in us perhaps we would not have ended in divorce. 

I think the man that asked me to the GC was more than likely already seeing this woman that he married only 6 months after he asked me out.


----------



## syhoybenden

"
Originally Posted by southbound View Post
I guess it depends on culture and where you live. Is Golden Coral a joke where you are from? I live in a rural area, and that would be considered perfectly normal where I'm from. Its absolutely fine to not like Golden Coral, but if a woman here acted like it wasn't "good enough" for her, she would viewed as someone with their nose in the air."

"At the time I received this invitation I had been in the states for just over a year after living in Europe for over 7 years. Had fantastic restaurants and wonderful food in Europe so just not what I am used to. I think it is all what you are comfortable with and one's association to a place. For me GC is off the list for a place to take a date. It would be like asking someone to go to McDonald's for dinner. Perhaps it should not matter where a person goes but I feel the selection tells a bit about a person and I am not a buffet type of person."


She says with her nose in the air.


----------



## AVR1962

Steve1000 said:


> I have to ask, how would you have known if people you dated before were multi-dating? When I first met my wife, I had no idea that she was multi-dating.


I don't think there is any way to know. I suspect the last man I was dating was multi-dating. When I made a suggestion of such he shook his head "no" and then told me that I would probably never be able to trust a man again because of what I went thru in my marriage. I saw it as him not wanting me to know the truth so he tossed it my corner.


----------



## SlowlyGoingCrazy

I liked coffee shop. Nothing too serious, just sitting and having a coffee. 

My bf and I went to coffee and after about 45 minutes he asked if I wanted to go have dinner. 

I thought that was perfect. We had a casual conversation and realized we were really clicking so we went out to a meal. Had we not gotten along so well it could just end with a coffee. 

But I'd totally be down for mcdonalds too. I don't want the fancy, first date impress me stuff. I want to know you. Sit and talk and figure you out. I'm not a fancy dinner person. I don't own a dress or heels. I wear work casual clothes and runners. I don't wear any jewelry or like flowers. A guy taking me to a fancy place would just feel fake to me. I want the dirty, real, no BS.


----------



## AVR1962

Rubix Cubed said:


> Dentist ..............Bites.:laugh::laugh::laugh:


LOL!!!!!! And he has a beautiful set of teeth!!!!


----------



## *Deidre*

I was friends with my husband for a few years before he asked me to dinner, and he wanted to take things to a new level. It's funny, because as friends, we did a lot of things together, and never thought about it. But, once the label of bf/gf was attached, he wanted to take me out to fancy dinners etc. We laugh about that. It shows that labels seem to change things.


----------



## SlowlyGoingCrazy

AVR1962 said:


> I don't think there is any way to know. I suspect the last man I was dating was multi-dating. When I made a suggestion of such he shook his head "no" and then told me that I would probably never be able to trust a man again because of what I went thru in my marriage. I saw it as him not wanting me to know the truth so he tossed it my corner.


I brought it up first conversation every time. Before I'd even meet them. 

When was your last date? Have you met many women from this site? What about off site? How often do you go on dates? 

And then I'd tell them my stance on multi-dating and that I didn't do it and expected the same. 

If that wasn't what he wanted he has plenty of time to say thanks but no thanks and not waste a night meeting me. 

Idk I'm blunt and to the point. I don't do small talk and pleasantries. I tried, I couldn't do the "do you like coffee" and "good, how are you" back and forth BS all day. I got things to do, let's figure out if we are compatible or not, then see if we have chemistry and if the sex is good and go from there.


----------



## Steve1000

AVR1962 said:


> I don't think there is any way to know. I suspect the last man I was dating was multi-dating. When I made a suggestion of such he shook his head "no" and then told me that I would probably never be able to trust a man again because of what I went thru in my marriage. I saw it as him not wanting me to know the truth so he tossed it my corner.


He didn't exactly have an abundance in compassion or patience, did he?... At least you knew early on that he wasn't marriage material.


----------



## AVR1962

Steve1000 said:


> He didn't exactly have an abundance in compassion or patience, did he?... At least you knew early on that he wasn't marriage material.


My exact thoughts!!! If you care for someone you show compassion for what they have endured and he did at first but when he decided he was done with me the tables turned.


----------



## AVR1962

syhoybenden said:


> "
> Originally Posted by southbound View Post
> I guess it depends on culture and where you live. Is Golden Coral a joke where you are from? I live in a rural area, and that would be considered perfectly normal where I'm from. Its absolutely fine to not like Golden Coral, but if a woman here acted like it wasn't "good enough" for her, she would viewed as someone with their nose in the air."
> 
> "At the time I received this invitation I had been in the states for just over a year after living in Europe for over 7 years. Had fantastic restaurants and wonderful food in Europe so just not what I am used to. I think it is all what you are comfortable with and one's association to a place. For me GC is off the list for a place to take a date. It would be like asking someone to go to McDonald's for dinner. Perhaps it should not matter where a person goes but I feel the selection tells a bit about a person and I am not a buffet type of person."
> 
> 
> She says with her nose in the air.


I am actually a very down to earth person and I do not need to prove that to anyone. It is a matter of what we are used to. I had opportunity, I lived that opportunity and I have been exposed to something better than eating at a GC buffet....there is nothing wrong with that. GC buffet people have their level of comfort and there is nothing wrong with that either.


----------



## syhoybenden

Don't take me too seriously. It was simply a gentle nudge, an attempt at humour if you will.


----------



## Ynot

I think first dates, just like everything else should be about being yourself. If you like Golden Corral, good steak, seafood, Italian, French, BBQ whatever it is that is where you should go. Why put on airs that you are something you aren't.

I like good food. I don't mind the occasional buffet, but for the most part I would rather have a good steak or sushi, so when I ask a woman out those would be my go to places. 

The few times I have tried to impress her, I usually discovered a few things. First off I found that I was not comfortable trying to be something I wasn't. And if she really liked it, by ordering expensive wines or drinks, etc I wasn't comfortable with her either. 

OTOH if I take her to a place I enjoy, I can just be my self. If she happens to enjoy it - well great, we have something in common. If she turns her nose up at it - she can go **** her self.


----------



## Chuck71

AVR.... I gots ya beat....... talked to a girl on Zoosk back in February. 40 miles away, great chat but

unable to connect on logistics. LSS.... when I decided to date this one girl, was cleaning out

my FB chats and, lo n behold..... she was married TWO months later. We never friend'd 

but I could comment...... was tempted to say -Congratulations.... you sure moved quick-

But...... I didn't. So.... you aren't alone LOL.

About GC..... it's a geographical thing. Large cities has so much diversity in places to go.

Me.... rural area. Not many choices..... My go to is an Italian bistro, know the owner, put his

kids through college, very good atmosphere, moderately priced. But I'm certain rural US is as different

to Europe as night and day.


----------



## southbound

AVR1962 said:


> southbound said:
> 
> 
> 
> I guess it depends on culture and where you live. Is Golden Coral a joke where you are from? I live in a rural area, and that would be considered perfectly normal where I'm from. Its absolutely fine to not like Golden Coral, but if a woman here acted like it wasn't "good enough" for her, she would viewed as someone with their nose in the air.
> 
> 
> 
> At the time I received this invitation I had been in the states for just over a year after living in Europe for over 7 years. Had fantastic restaurants and wonderful food in Europe so just not what I am used to. I think it is all what you are comfortable with and one's association to a place. For me GC is off the list for a place to take a date. It would be like asking someone to go to McDonald's for dinner. Perhaps it should not matter where a person goes but I feel the selection tells a bit about a person and I am not a buffet type of person.
Click to expand...

I guess that explains a lot. I'm sure when we read items on a forum, we base it on what we are accustomed to. Where I live, there aren't too many women who have lived in Europe, so I wouldn't be thinking about matching a European restaurant. It's funny, my x sister in law and her husband used to travel several miles just to eat at GC; she loved it.


----------



## Young at Heart

I know it has all been said by now, but this is a pet peeve of mine.

My wife likes to go out to dinner (and weekend brunch). I will ask her if she would like to go out and she will say yes, pick a place.

At that point I now ask if she really means that or if she has something in mind.

I can't tell you the number of times, I have picked a place only to be told, "I don't like that kind of food", "I had that kind of ethnic food for lunch yesterday", "You know that kind of food gives me gas" " I would rather go out for......"

Sometimes I have taken her to the place she wanted to go and they had a 2 hour wait that was too much for her, so she said pick another place and I did and she said no, she wanted something else. At one point, I told her I was going to drive the the restaurant I wanted to go to and eat there, she could take the car and take herself to any other restaurant. Another time I told he I didn't like her game of "20 questions" where I had to try to read her mind.

Personally, I love big salads for dinner and a buffet with a salad bar is my ideal dinner. I really love cruise ships for this reason. 

If a woman told me to pick place for our first date and then said no, I don't want to go there, I would dump her. 

If I were feeling mean, I might even have said, had it worked out I might have taken you on a cruise I am planning on taking later in the year where they also have a nice buffet, glad we cleared this up early.


----------



## CharlieParker

Chuck71 said:


> About GC..... it's a geographical thing. Large cities has so much diversity in places to go.
> 
> Me.... rural area. Not many choices.....


Not rural, but when we moved city to suburb our main criteria was quality and quantity of restaurants/bars nearby (walking distance). That was limiting but worked out. 

Our next move will be a Northeast suburb to a city (TBD) in the South, I'm worried, mainly about the food and walkability.


----------



## Chuck71

Young at Heart said:


> I know it has all been said by now, but this is a pet peeve of mine.
> 
> My wife likes to go out to dinner (and weekend brunch).  I will ask her if she would like to go out and she will say yes, pick a place.
> 
> At that point I now ask if she really means that or if she has something in mind.
> 
> I can't tell you the number of times, I have picked a place only to be told, "I don't like that kind of food", "I had that kind of ethnic food for lunch yesterday", "You know that kind of food gives me gas" " I would rather go out for......"
> 
> Sometimes I have taken her to the place she wanted to go and they had a 2 hour wait that was too much for her, so she said pick another place and I did and she said no, she wanted something else. At one point, I told her I was going to drive the the restaurant I wanted to go to and eat there, she could take the car and take herself to any other restaurant. Another time I told he I didn't like her game of "20 questions" where I had to try to read her mind.
> 
> Personally, I love big salads for dinner and a buffet with a salad bar is my ideal dinner. I really love cruise ships for this reason.
> 
> If a woman told me to pick place for our first date and then said no, I don't want to go there, I would dump her.
> 
> If I were feeling mean, I might even have said, had it worked out I might have taken you on a cruise I am planning on taking later in the year where they also have a nice buffet, glad we cleared this up early.


Picnic at the lake.............. stop complaining darlin

If you want me to pick, give me 5 no-go's. It's not Gdamn rocket science


----------



## memyselfandi

Not many..

I think I would have laughed and said, "I thought you were kidding..yet I actually love buffets". 

Maybe the guy's got a great sense of humor and thought he'd set the first date out on a fun note.

How did it go anyway?


----------



## SlowlyGoingCrazy

I don't like being passed the choice of where I want to go to eat but then I also make sure I am ok with wherever he wants to go. I'm not picky, I just hate making choices. 

I don't like sushi though, never had someone ask me to go there. I may have to say no then. 

Many of my potential dates wanted to do the "where do you want to go" thing and I was kind of annoyed. 
My now bf did all the picking for our first. I was happy about that.


----------



## southbound

AVR1962 said:


> I am actually a very down to earth person and I do not need to prove that to anyone. It is a matter of what we are used to. I had opportunity, I lived that opportunity and I have been exposed to something better than eating at a GC buffet....there is nothing wrong with that. GC buffet people have their level of comfort and there is nothing wrong with that either.


I think it was just the way you presented it. You didn't say that he picked one of your least favorite places and you wondered what to do, but you laughed hysterically and was in total bewilderment at his choice. That made it seem like it wasn't "good enough" for you. I don't think my reaction would have been that strong if I had been invited to Sonic. It makes it sound like the guy is a total idiot for going to GC on a first date. 

By starting the post with that description, it seems that you assumed everyone would totally agree with you and find it hysterical; some did, but some didn't. 

You also mention that you have been exposed to something "better" than GC. While many may agree, that is still an opinion.


----------



## memyselfandi

After reading everyone's replies, she may have been right in cancelling; especially if she's not a buffet type person. Seems sort of odd anyway to ask someone to meet for a first date at Golden Corral..lol!!


----------



## SlowlyGoingCrazy

Yes, I've been exposed to fancy food and fancy places. I have a relative who is a high up, important person in their city and we go to events and restaurants and what not. I hate it. It's all too prissy and dainty for me. I have to buy stupid, nice clothes (I still refuse dresses and heels) 

It's like a lady I used to know. She scoffed at Walmart and only would buy the best stuff. Like, I'm happy for your $100 blouse but I can get the same thing at the thrift store for $5. But she "wouldn't be caught dead" there. Why? Cause saving money is uncool? It's like my kids refusing to wear a winter jacket in -30 cause it's not cool. You look stupid, stupid shouldn't be cool. 

Sorry, my rant.


----------



## AVR1962

syhoybenden said:


> Don't take me too seriously. It was simply a gentle nudge, an attempt at humour if you will.


Got ya! Humor tends to get lost without voice sometimes!!!!


----------



## AVR1962

Chuck71 said:


> AVR.... I gots ya beat....... talked to a girl on Zoosk back in February. 40 miles away, great chat but
> 
> unable to connect on logistics. LSS.... when I decided to date this one girl, was cleaning out
> 
> my FB chats and, lo n behold..... she was married TWO months later. We never friend'd
> 
> but I could comment...... was tempted to say -Congratulations.... you sure moved quick-
> 
> But...... I didn't. So.... you aren't alone LOL.
> 
> About GC..... it's a geographical thing. Large cities has so much diversity in places to go.
> 
> Me.... rural area. Not many choices..... My go to is an Italian bistro, know the owner, put his
> 
> kids through college, very good atmosphere, moderately priced. But I'm certain rural US is as different
> 
> to Europe as night and day.


I now live in the Dallas/Fort Worth area so definitely not lacking for variety here!!!!!! I think multi-dating is just the way most are doing it now. I cannot see myself still dating just 2 or 6 months before I married, seems crazy to me but maybe that's why I am here....I am not up with the times!!!


----------



## AVR1962

Young at Heart said:


> I know it has all been said by now, but this is a pet peeve of mine.
> 
> My wife likes to go out to dinner (and weekend brunch). I will ask her if she would like to go out and she will say yes, pick a place.
> 
> At that point I now ask if she really means that or if she has something in mind.
> 
> I can't tell you the number of times, I have picked a place only to be told, "I don't like that kind of food", "I had that kind of ethnic food for lunch yesterday", "You know that kind of food gives me gas" " I would rather go out for......"
> 
> Sometimes I have taken her to the place she wanted to go and they had a 2 hour wait that was too much for her, so she said pick another place and I did and she said no, she wanted something else. At one point, I told her I was going to drive the the restaurant I wanted to go to and eat there, she could take the car and take herself to any other restaurant. Another time I told he I didn't like her game of "20 questions" where I had to try to read her mind.
> 
> Personally, I love big salads for dinner and a buffet with a salad bar is my ideal dinner. I really love cruise ships for this reason.
> 
> If a woman told me to pick place for our first date and then said no, I don't want to go there, I would dump her.
> 
> If I were feeling mean, I might even have said, had it worked out I might have taken you on a cruise I am planning on taking later in the year where they also have a nice buffet, glad we cleared this up early.


Good point! I would tell my ex to choose the restaurant too. I think I was wanting him to think of something romantic, honestly. But he liked sandwich shops.....gag!!!!


----------



## CharlieParker

AVR1962 said:


> I now live in the Dallas/Fort Worth area so definitely not lacking for variety here!!!!!!


How are you doing for gas?

Totally unrelated, could one live in downtown Dallas without a car? And eat well?


----------



## Ynot

I was talking with the new woman I am dating. Telling her about my day golfing on Wednesday. I mentioned swinging thru Taco Bell for a few Soft Taco Supremes on the way back. She just about flew out of her seat with excitement. So we are planning a real low end date of going to a couple of dive bars and hitting Taco Bell after closing hour. Sort of like a real life episode of Lowered Expectations.


----------



## john117

Each city has its own local "good" places to eat. We have an Egyptian guy running a falafel / shrwama joint. The place looks like a crime scene but the food is exceptional.


----------



## john117

CharlieParker said:


> How are you doing for gas?
> 
> Totally unrelated, could one live in downtown Dallas without a car? And eat well?


Not that I can remember. Atlanta and Savannah, maybe. Smaller college cities, like Lexington KY and smaller, maybe. Miami...


----------



## Andy1001

Ynot said:


> I was talking with the new woman I am dating. Telling her about my day golfing on Wednesday. I mentioned swinging thru Taco Bell for a few Soft Taco Supremes on the way back. She just about flew out of her seat with excitement. So we are planning a real low end date of going to a couple of dive bars and hitting Taco Bell after closing hour. Sort of like a real life episode of Lowered Expectations.


She sounds like a keeper.🌮🌮🌮


----------



## Ynot

Andy1001 said:


> She sounds like a keeper.🌮🌮🌮


My thoughts exactly.


----------



## john117

Taco Bell is a preferred low cal super low cost food for many college kids


----------



## memyselfandi

I'd hate to be a guy on a first date. Rather than worry about the best restaurant to go to, I think I'd just plan a place for coffee. Course not all women like coffee either (including me).

Golden Corral isn't bad..if you choose a nice quiet booth near the back and away from all the kiddos running around on a Saturday night..

I'm not a snob at all. I actually enjoy the non-steak thing for a first date as it's expensive. 

I'd much rather go for a greasy pizza joint to be honest. Ordering half what he likes and half what I like; along with a few cold brewskis would be right up my alley!!


----------



## memyselfandi

kag123 said:


> This thread is super amusing but, man, I'm so glad I am not in the dating scene! All these rules are exhausting to read about, much less navigate through in real life. No thanks! If anything were to happen to my marriage...it would be full on crazy cat lady for me.


Me too and no lie!! The dating scene seems soo exhausting these days and so much different than when I was in the dating scene. So glad I'm married as if I wasn't, I'd just become much like you, except I'd be the crazy dog lady!!


----------



## southbound

memyselfandi said:


> kag123 said:
> 
> 
> 
> This thread is super amusing but, man, I'm so glad I am not in the dating scene! All these rules are exhausting to read about, much less navigate through in real life. No thanks! If anything were to happen to my marriage...it would be full on crazy cat lady for me.
> 
> 
> 
> Me too and no lie!! The dating scene seems soo exhausting these days and so much different than when I was in the dating scene. So glad I'm married as if I wasn't, I'd just become much like you, except I'd be the crazy dog lady!!
Click to expand...


I have been divorced about 7 years. Luckily, I am happy being single. The dating scene seems too exhausting. Everything is so precise. I know everyone will explain it by saying "to each his own." That is true, but it just seems like everybody's "to each his own" is so complicated anymore. If you misspeak or pick the wrong restaurant, you've already shot yourself in the leg. I miss the days of my teens and early twenties when all anybody seemed to care about was having some gas in the tank, getting a pizza, and watching a movie at the house. It didn't take a complicated list to click with somebody then. Sadly, those days are gone and will never return.


----------



## chillymorn69

too many expectations will ruin the date for both.

if I would be dating again and ran across someone who balked at where I suggested to eat then shes not for me. 

I'd just keep moving until I found one that like me and where I like to eat. I guess I'm done trying to impress either you like me or you don"t theres plenty of fish in the sea and sometime I like fishing and sometimes I don't .


I'd probably look for a good old country gal. one that don't mind where we eat so much and would eat anywhere because she liked my company. 

so I guess I'd be single the rest of my life lol and that would be ok I like my own company.


----------



## Chuck71

southbound said:


> I have been divorced about 7 years. Luckily, I am happy being single. The dating scene seems too exhausting. Everything is so precise. I know everyone will explain it by saying "to each his own." That is true, but it just seems like everybody's "to each his own" is so complicated anymore. * If you misspeak or pick the wrong restaurant, you've already shot yourself in the leg*. I miss the days of my teens and early twenties when all anybody seemed to care about was having some gas in the tank, getting a pizza, and watching a movie at the house. It didn't take a complicated list to click with somebody then. Sadly, those days are gone and will never return.


Hell..... I do those on purpose. Nice early look at how anal my date can be.

Course when they learned I work in the profiling field, for some reason.... they're nervous.

*sheeteatinggrin*


----------



## Handy

* Young at Heart
My wife likes to go out to dinner (and weekend brunch). I will ask her if she would like to go out and she will say yes, pick a place.

At that point I now ask if she really means that or if she has something in mind.

I can't tell you the number of times, I have picked a place only to be told, "I don't like that kind of food", "I had that kind of ethnic food for lunch yesterday", "You know that kind of food gives me gas" ............................................*

I get that a lot from my W. I also her about her claiming a suggestion is too similar to what she ate a couple of meals ago. 

I decided that after 2 negative comments from her I will stay home and heat up a TV dinner for us, then go for a bike ride and get a snack that "I like." Ice cream melts before I get home so she is out of luck. I used to feel guilty for not bringing something home for her but i know most of the things I could bring home would also be accompanied by some negative comment.

I am on a first name basis at several fast food places, they know my name and sometimes know what I am about to order.

It is my opinion, some picky people just like to complain and will find an excuse to shoot down almost anyone's suggestions or cooking.


----------



## Chuck71

chillymorn69 said:


> too many expectations will ruin the date for both.
> 
> if I would be dating again and ran across someone who balked at where I suggested to eat then shes not for me.
> 
> I'd just keep moving until I found one that like me and where I like to eat. I guess I'm done trying to impress either you like me or you don"t theres plenty of fish in the sea and sometime I like fishing and sometimes I don't .
> 
> 
> I'd probably look for a good old country gal. one that don't mind where we eat so much and would eat anywhere because she liked my company.
> 
> so I guess I'd be single the rest of my life lol and that would be ok I like my own company.


Foothills of dem Smoky Mountains here. 1st love..... mountain girl, XW.... mountain girl,

current g/f... mountain girl. Don't mind getting their hands dirty and sweat. They clean up super

good as well!

If I have to impress a female.... I shouldn't be going out with her. My pop always told me that.

Matter of fact, my mom did too.


----------



## chillymorn69

Chuck71 said:


> Foothills of dem Smoky Mountains here. 1st love..... mountain girl, XW.... mountain girl,
> 
> current g/f... mountain girl. Don't mind getting their hands dirty and sweat. They clean up super
> 
> good as well!
> 
> If I have to impress a female.... I shouldn't be going out with her. My pop always told me that.
> 
> Matter of fact, my mom did too.


Smart parents you had!


----------



## southbound

chillymorn69 said:


> too many expectations will ruin the date for both.
> 
> if I would be dating again and ran across someone who balked at where I suggested to eat then shes not for me.
> 
> I'd just keep moving until I found one that like me and where I like to eat. I guess I'm done trying to impress either you like me or you don"t theres plenty of fish in the sea and sometime I like fishing and sometimes I don't .
> 
> 
> I'd probably look for a good old country gal. one that don't mind where we eat so much and would eat anywhere because she liked my company.
> 
> so I guess I'd be single the rest of my life lol and that would be ok I like my own company.


I agree with looking for a country gal. Im done trying to impress too, but I think women want to be impressed more when they're older than when younger.


----------



## Andy1001

Handy said:


> * Young at Heart
> My wife likes to go out to dinner (and weekend brunch). I will ask her if she would like to go out and she will say yes, pick a place.
> 
> At that point I now ask if she really means that or if she has something in mind.
> 
> I can't tell you the number of times, I have picked a place only to be told, "I don't like that kind of food", "I had that kind of ethnic food for lunch yesterday", "You know that kind of food gives me gas" ............................................*
> 
> I get that a lot from my W. I also her about her claiming a suggestion is too similar to what she ate a couple of meals ago.
> 
> I decided that after 2 negative comments from her I will stay home and heat up a TV dinner for us, then go for a bike ride and get a snack that "I like." Ice cream melts before I get home so she is out of luck. I used to feel guilty for not bringing something home for her but i know most of the things I could bring home would also be accompanied by some negative comment.
> 
> I am on a first name basis at several fast food places, they know my name and sometimes know what I am about to order.
> 
> It is my opinion, some picky people just like to complain and will find an excuse to shoot down almost anyone's suggestions or cooking.


Try this.Tell your wife you feel like going out to eat at xxxx and ask her does she want to come.
She either does or she doesn't.


----------



## Andy1001

john117 said:


> Each city has its own local "good" places to eat. We have an Egyptian guy running a falafel / shrwama joint. The place looks like a crime scene but the food is exceptional.


I was always told by my Dad to look for where the taxi drivers eat in a city and where the truck drivers eat when on the road.
He was right.


----------



## CharlieParker

Andy1001 said:


> I was always told by my Dad to look for where the taxi drivers eat in a city and where the truck drivers eat when on the road.
> He was right.


Or if it's an ethnic place do people from the home country eat there. I always shunned an Indian place in a hideous and out of place strip mall in my little village. One night I came home unusually late and unusually on the bus. I walked past it and many many Indians were leaving, but hardly any live in town. We gave it a shot. Awesome. And oddly enough it was owned and run by an Irish couple.


----------



## chillymorn69

southbound said:


> I agree with looking for a country gal. Im done trying to impress too, but I think women want to be impressed more when they're older than when younger.


Maybe so.

ButI'm not playing that game.

Just don't care anymore, my give a damn is broken. 

The only standards that matter are my own.

With that said i find it funny because most women my age look ....well how should I put it frumpy.and being a reasonable person i don't mind alittle frump. But if your frumpy then lets face it you better be happy your even going out on a date!

As I get older its more about a plesent disposition than pure good looks.


Someone whos fun and positive and not a negative nancy. You can take some women out to a 100$ meal and at the end ask how she liked it and she will say .....the bathroom was dirty. Are you fing kidden me I just spent $$$ and all you can say is the bathroom was dirty how about a thanks it was nice and the food was delish thanks for taking me.


----------



## AVR1962

CharlieParker said:


> How are you doing for gas?
> 
> Totally unrelated, could one live in downtown Dallas without a car? And eat well?


There have been long lines at the gas pumps. I filled up today and the lower octave fuels were sold out so I had to pay $2.99 a gallon for gas....reminds me of being in Europe!!! We do still have gas here. I travel for work, at least part-time, I am am keeping my fingers crossed and hopeful relief is insight!


----------



## Ynot

southbound said:


> I have been divorced about 7 years. Luckily, I am happy being single. The dating scene seems too exhausting. Everything is so precise. I know everyone will explain it by saying "to each his own." That is true, but it just seems like everybody's "to each his own" is so complicated anymore. * If you misspeak or pick the wrong restaurant, you've already shot yourself in the leg.* I miss the days of my teens and early twenties when all anybody seemed to care about was having some gas in the tank, getting a pizza, and watching a movie at the house. It didn't take a complicated list to click with somebody then. Sadly, those days are gone and will never return.


That is because you have it all backwards. You seem to think you need to impress them. Why not allow them to impress you instead? So you ask her out and it doesn't work out? So what? You just found another person who wasn't right for you. When she is gone there will be three more to take her place. Reading your posts it makes me think you are the one with the issues, not the women you go out.
And for the record, nothing has really changed when it comes to dating. Everyone has expectations based on their life experience. When you were 16-18-20 perhaps only having gas in your car, a pizza and a movie at home was the best you could expect. Hopefully as you have gotten older, you expect more than just having gas in your car, a pizza and a movie on the couch. And if that is all you can hope for, at least be honest enough about to yourself and stop blaming the world.


----------



## AVR1962

john117 said:


> Each city has its own local "good" places to eat. We have an Egyptian guy running a falafel / shrwama joint. The place looks like a crime scene but the food is exceptional.


My type of place, love the hole in the wall types!!!! There is a divey little Mexican place here that makes the best beef tacos from beef tongue!!!!!


----------



## AVR1962

southbound said:


> I agree with looking for a country gal. Im done trying to impress too, but I think women want to be impressed more when they're older than when younger.


I am a country gal! Came from a small town of less than 400 people....we raised sheep and a ton of chickens!!!!


----------



## Chuck71

chillymorn69 said:


> Maybe so.
> 
> ButI'm not playing that game.
> 
> Just don't care anymore, my give a damn is broken.
> 
> The only standards that matter are my own.
> 
> With that said i find it funny because most women my age look ....well how should I put it frumpy.and being a reasonable person i don't mind alittle frump. But if your frumpy then lets face it you better be happy your even going out on a date!
> 
> As I get older its more about a plesent disposition than pure good looks.
> 
> 
> Someone whos fun and positive and not a negative nancy. You can take some women out to a 100$ meal and at the end ask how she liked it and she will say .....the bathroom was dirty. Are you fing kidden me I just spent $$$ and all you can say is the bathroom was dirty how about a thanks it was nice and the food was delish thanks for taking me.


I'm 45. When I was in my 20s... played the field, went after anything not nailed down.

She has a cute tail, perky breasts, crappy job, can't walk and chew bubble gum at same time. Didn't matter....

Well.... now they do. Things change from age "25" to 45. Just a cute tail and nice rack don't

get it anymore. Oh.... the most bitter females I have met since my D nearly five years back....

were ones who "got by on looks" and now that they are 40 and up.... their once "go to" has "gots up 'n gone."


----------



## Blondilocks

AVR1962 said:


> I am a country gal! Came from a small town of less than 400 people....we raised sheep and a ton of chickens!!!!


400 people? Were you all related?


----------



## southbound

Ynot said:


> southbound said:
> 
> 
> 
> I have been divorced about 7 years. Luckily, I am happy being single. The dating scene seems too exhausting. Everything is so precise. I know everyone will explain it by saying "to each his own." That is true, but it just seems like everybody's "to each his own" is so complicated anymore. * If you misspeak or pick the wrong restaurant, you've already shot yourself in the leg.* I miss the days of my teens and early twenties when all anybody seemed to care about was having some gas in the tank, getting a pizza, and watching a movie at the house. It didn't take a complicated list to click with somebody then. Sadly, those days are gone and will never return.
> 
> 
> 
> That is because you have it all backwards. You seem to think you need to impress them. Why not allow them to impress you instead? So you ask her out and it doesn't work out? So what? You just found another person who wasn't right for you. When she is gone there will be three more to take her place. Reading your posts it makes me think you are the one with the issues, not the women you go out.
> And for the record, nothing has really changed when it comes to dating. Everyone has expectations based on their life experience. When you were 16-18-20 perhaps only having gas in your car, a pizza and a movie at home was the best you could expect. Hopefully as you have gotten older, you expect more than just having gas in your car, a pizza and a movie on the couch. And if that is all you can hope for, at least be honest enough about to yourself and stop blaming the world.
Click to expand...

I'm not blaming the world, I'm just making observations on what I observe and hear from others. I'm actually not trying to date. Maybe I didn't mention it in this thread, but I have in others; I'm happy being single.


----------



## chillymorn69

AVR1962 said:


> I am a country gal! Came from a small town of less than 400 people....we raised sheep and a ton of chickens!!!!


Hmm, but you look down your nose at the golden coral.

Hmm, well did you ever go out with mr golden coral? Sorry I didn't read through the whole thread so if you answered already and don't feel like repeating thats cool.

I like to ask the local people where ever i go...whats the best hole in the wall to grab a bite? Most times I'm pleased but sometimes it really sucked! And once in awhile it becomes a favorite. 

Went to a berger joint last night and had their fish sandwich lol, seen someone elses and it looked good.I wasn't disapointed!


----------



## Ynot

southbound said:


> I'm not blaming the world, I'm just making observations on what I observe and hear from others. I'm actually not trying to date. Maybe I didn't mention it in this thread, but I have in others; I'm happy being single.


It is cool if you don't want to date, It is your choice, but I might suggest you experience things yourself before opining on the basis of second and third hand experiences. The fact is that nothing has changed. People want to be impressed, if what they do didn't impress the person they were trying to impress, they should be glad they found this out sooner rather than later. Not complain that dating sucks.
Everyone has their experiences, some people take time to learn from them. Others not so much. So perhaps the misspeaking you mentioned are a result of one side or the other either learning or not learning their lesson? Either way, they found out, so it is all good.


----------



## southbound

Ynot said:


> southbound said:
> 
> 
> 
> I'm not blaming the world, I'm just making observations on what I observe and hear from others. I'm actually not trying to date. Maybe I didn't mention it in this thread, but I have in others; I'm happy being single.
> 
> 
> 
> It is cool if you don't want to date, It is your choice, but I might suggest you experience things yourself before opining on the basis of second and third hand experiences. The fact is that nothing has changed. People want to be impressed, if what they do didn't impress the person they were trying to impress, they should be glad they found this out sooner rather than later. Not complain that dating sucks.
> Everyone has their experiences, some people take time to learn from them. Others not so much. So perhaps the misspeaking you mentioned are a result of one side or the other either learning or not learning their lesson? Either way, they found out, so it is all good.
Click to expand...

I'm just saying that I think a relationship is about whether two people click in a way that possibly can't even be explained. I guess that's what I saw growing up, so it's difficult for me to adjust to the fact that materialism plays such a role. I'm sure you are correct that everyone wants to be impressed. I just think people once looked more on the inside of a person to be impressed rather than what they had. I do believe dating has changed. I'm sure if my grandparents, who have long since passed away, could read some of the stuff here, they would either think it was a joke or that people had gone crazy.


----------



## chillymorn69

Ynot said:


> It is cool if you don't want to date, It is your choice, but I might suggest you experience things yourself before opining on the basis of second and third hand experiences. The fact is that nothing has changed. People want to be impressed, if what they do didn't impress the person they were trying to impress, they should be glad they found this out sooner rather than later. Not complain that dating sucks.
> Everyone has their experiences, some people take time to learn from them. Others not so much. So perhaps the misspeaking you mentioned are a result of one side or the other either learning or not learning their lesson? Either way, they found out, so it is all good.


I don't want to be impressed. Unless you impress me with your good nature and pleasent disposition and honesty.

Don't get me wrong there has to be an attraction. But shiny bobbles and fakness trying to impress is just a huge turn off.

Thats what i have learned.


----------



## southbound

I supppse it's probably different for men and women. If I am attracted to a woman, we click, and she seems like a good person, I don't give a crap what kind of job she has or if McDonalds is her favorite restaurant of all time. 

I'm divorced, so this may not count for much, but when I started dating my x wife in my early 20s, I was in college and planning for a decent career. On the other hand, she and her parents were as poor as church mice and it showed. She was not in college, nor did she plan to be. 

I did, however, click with her and I thought she was a very attractive girl both inside and out. Her decency and innocent demeanor was very attractive to me. 

Although we eventually divorced, we had several good years together. If I were to date today, again, I would look to be impressed with who they were on the inside.


----------



## Ynot

chillymorn69 said:


> I don't want to be impressed. Unless you impress me with your good nature and pleasent disposition and honesty.
> 
> Don't get me wrong there has to be an attraction. But shiny bobbles and fakness trying to impress is just a huge turn off.
> 
> Thats what i have learned.


Good nature and pleasant disposition and honesty are all great things to be impressed with. Which is what I am saying. We all want to be impressed by what impresses us. If someone thinks shiny bobbles and fakeness is impressive, well then they aren't for me.
My point is everyone wants to be impressed if what they think is impressive, doesn't impress you, at least you know not to waste anymore time on them.


----------



## Ynot

southbound said:


> If I were to date today, again, I would look to be impressed with who they were on the inside.


As you should be. Which isn't really any different than what most women want as well. I have met many who simply could not care any less if you have a new car, a big house, or even a big ****. Most people have some minimum standards - so they may not care if you have a big car, but they might not want you to pick them up on bicycle, or a big house, but that doesn't mean they are looking for a guy living in a card board box. But in then end it is always what is inside that matters most. 
And as I said, if they need to feted at a five star restaurant, then screw them. What they are looking for is some effort on your part.


----------



## chillymorn69

Ynot said:


> Good nature and pleasant disposition and honesty are all great things to be impressed with. Which is what I am saying. We all want to be impressed by what impresses us. If someone thinks shiny bobbles and fakeness is impressive, well then they aren't for me.
> My point is everyone wants to be impressed if what they think is impressive, doesn't impress you, at least you know not to waste anymore time on them.


The spirt of this conversation was more along the line of being impressed with which restaurant or how you dress which car you drive.


Buy agreed that less tanagable things are what impresses me.


----------



## Ynot

chillymorn69 said:


> The spirt of this conversation was more along the line of being impressed with which restaurant or how you dress which car you drive.
> 
> 
> Buy agreed that less tanagable things are what impresses me.


True and I said those aren't the things that matter. They are just superficial. But some people need to be impressed by the superficial because they are just shallow people any ways. If that is the case, be glad you found out sooner rather than later.


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## AVR1962

southbound said:


> I'm just saying that I think a relationship is about whether two people click in a way that possibly can't even be explained. I guess that's what I saw growing up, so it's difficult for me to adjust to the fact that materialism plays such a role. I'm sure you are correct that everyone wants to be impressed. I just think people once looked more on the inside of a person to be impressed rather than what they had. I do believe dating has changed. I'm sure if my grandparents, who have long since passed away, could read some of the stuff here, they would either think it was a joke or that people had gone crazy.


I do get what you saying and I feel it too. In our grandparents, and even our parents, day women were the homemakers and dependent on the men for their liveihood. It still exists but not like it did before. Women, like myself, have their own career and can live independently. When I was a kid growing up almost everyone attended church and we all had values and teachers were able to discipline us and parents respected the teacher's authority. Not much of that exists today and it has changed everything in how we relate to one another. The 80's brought on a divorce epidemic, this was also when child protective services became more onboard in "protecting" children. With internet came porn and I think addiction and use of porn has become an all-time high and I think it creates great hardship on relationships. We are now in a position that I don't see reversing itself. Women and men have been burned by their spouses in one way or the other and once that dagger is thrown to the heart it is hard for us to trust again. It is hard for us to give our heart to another person and feel we can open our lives to another person. I have many lady friends who refuse to date because they don't want to be hurt. I married two men who were not fully committed to the marriage. Why? Because they could not true love. It REALLY takes getting down to you (for each of us) and figuring out what we did to get ourselves in our situations that caused us hurt. It's about working out our own issues so we can love again, so we can trust again, so we can give again.


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## southbound

AVR1962 said:


> southbound said:
> 
> 
> 
> I'm just saying that I think a relationship is about whether two people click in a way that possibly can't even be explained. I guess that's what I saw growing up, so it's difficult for me to adjust to the fact that materialism plays such a role. I'm sure you are correct that everyone wants to be impressed. I just think people once looked more on the inside of a person to be impressed rather than what they had. I do believe dating has changed. I'm sure if my grandparents, who have long since passed away, could read some of the stuff here, they would either think it was a joke or that people had gone crazy.
> 
> 
> 
> I do get what you saying and I feel it too. In our grandparents, and even our parents, day women were the homemakers and dependent on the men for their liveihood. It still exists but not like it did before. Women, like myself, have their own career and can live independently. When I was a kid growing up almost everyone attended church and we all had values and teachers were able to discipline us and parents respected the teacher's authority. Not much of that exists today and it has changed everything in how we relate to one another. The 80's brought on a divorce epidemic, this was also when child protective services became more onboard in "protecting" children. With internet came porn and I think addiction and use of porn has become an all-time high and I think it creates great hardship on relationships. We are now in a position that I don't see reversing itself. Women and men have been burned by their spouses in one way or the other and once that dagger is thrown to the heart it is hard for us to trust again. It is hard for us to give our heart to another person and feel we can open our lives to another person. I have many lady friends who refuse to date because they don't want to be hurt. I married two men who were not fully committed to the marriage. Why? Because they could not true love. It REALLY takes getting down to you (for each of us) and figuring out what we did to get ourselves in our situations that caused us hurt. It's about working out our own issues so we can love again, so we can trust again, so we can give again.
Click to expand...

Good post!


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## AVR1962

Blondilocks said:


> 400 people? Were you all related?


Yeah, and get this Golden Corral was so unpopular where I was from that it went out of business!!!!!!


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## southbound

AVR1962 said:


> Blondilocks said:
> 
> 
> 
> 400 people? Were you all related?
> 
> 
> 
> Yeah, and get this Golden Corral was so unpopular where I was from that it went out of business!!!!!!
Click to expand...

Maybe they are different in different places. Some here have talked about how loud and rowdy the atmosphere is at GC. I don't recall that at the ones I've been to. It's no different than the atmosphere at Longhorn, Applebees, O'Charley's, and places like that. But then again, those may be horrible restaurants to some people. Lol


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## john117

One of my former interns works at GC to help pay for college. She reported that there's a huge variation of quality and ambiance  between GC's. Indeed, the one next to us is pretty decent (for a buffet) but the one where I work is pretty awful.


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