# Divorce Question



## Spooky (Feb 15, 2011)

Hi,
I'm new to the forum and first off I would like to say "Thank You" to any and all who answer my questions and/or read my post.

I am actually writing this question in service of my best friend. Let me try to summarize:

She and her husband were married in July 2010. Prior to this they had been living together in HER house for approx. 2 years. Without going into too much detail, he basically walked out on her in Jan. 2011 and basically stated he was tired of the '*****ing'. Her mother is an attorney and on her mother's advice before they married they signed a pre-nup stating that no matter what happens, HER house stays HER house; he has no claim to it at all (It was her grandma's house and she purchased it from her father). Her husband has a bank account, but he doesn't use it for paying bills or even having his paycheck direct deposited into. He always cashes his check and then pays his bills by money order and then he gives her cash to pay whatever bills need to get paid. The bank account mainly houses money that he uses to purchase things and receive payments from PayPal. When they got married, she had to put her name on that bank account in order to cash their wedding checks, as the checks were written out in both their names. They deposited 1200.00 and they agreed they wouldn't use that money as she is unemployed and they might need it for emergencies, etc. She maintains her own bank account to pay her bills, mortgage etc. The night before he left she discovered while she was putting clothes in their spare bedroom closet bank statements from that bank addressed to both of them that were opened, but only for Dec. and Nov. The other bank statements from Aug - Oct were missing. However, she discovered by Dec. the account was cleaned out. She confronts her husband and wants to know where the money went. He claims he doesn't know what he spent it on, then gets angry and leaves for 3 days. He calls her on day 3 and says he got an apartment lease and that he can give notice to get out of it, but that he still has to pay 60 days of rent and that this will be good for their marriage if he lives there for 60 days. He still will not tell her where the money went. After a couple of weeks of this crap he finally tells her he wants a divorce. She's fed up at this point and agrees and since her mom is an attorney her mother is doing the divorce paperwork etc and she informed him of this ahead of time. He agreed and in spite of everything, things seemed to be moving along fine; he came and moved out all his stuff etc and she signed the paperwork. He called her mom today and told her that he went and filed his own paperwork for a divorce and told them he didn't have any money and they waved the fee (I'm assuming the courthouse) 

My questions are following:

Can a courthouse waive a fee for filing for divorce?
What are the advantages of filing for a divorce first? Considering he agreed to what was going on at the time, she is scared there is something he's planning on doing something since this is totally out of the blue and he's filing his own paperwork.

Sorry for the rant, but she can't really get alot of answers from her mom (very estranged relationship) and I dont' have enough knowledge to help her.

Spooky


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

Since her mother is handling the divorce for her, she should be okay. If the court forwards any paperwork (on his behalf) to her, she should send it to her mother. I really don't think any of this is a big deal. Of course, different states have different laws.


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## sisters359 (Apr 9, 2009)

If there is no money and they had a pre-nup about the house, then there isn't much to worry about. She could go after part of his pay check through legal means, but he has been carefully covering his tracks about money for a long time, it appears, so she'll have difficulty getting anything more out of him unless they can demonstrate he has additional income (besides the pay check). It would be difficult to prove what happened to the $1200; since they are both on the account, either of them could have withdrawn it, it will seem. 

If she can cut her losses now, she should. Good luck.


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## jmfabulous (Jan 19, 2011)

The advantage of filing first is being the plaintiff...depends on whether that is really an advantage or not.

The court can waive a fee; however, he would have to show that he doesn't have an income, or he has a limited income. I doubt anyone with a paying job would get legal fees waived, but what do I know.

I agree. He has been covering his tracks for a long time. Sneaky. Suspicious. She should be glad it's over and she can move on.


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## Spooky (Feb 15, 2011)

_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## believer (Apr 22, 2008)

It seems strange the court would just waive the fee without documentation that they didn't have money. I doubt they just take someone's word for it, if anything, they might offer pricing based on a sliding scale on income- but again, would think he would have to prove the income amount.
If he filed there should be a case # issused, see if she can get it from him to ensure he actually filed & isn't just saying so. It might be public record, so she might be able to go online & check herself. don't think there is necessarily any advantage of who files 1st, except that person incurs costs to file, etc. 

In FL I was just reading if no kids, don't recall about property - there is something called a simple divorce that can be filed. Might be worth looking into as well. 

It does not sound like the husband is very trustworthy in the finance dept, so I would recommend seperating any assests ASAP before he tries to do something with them. Also if they have any joint credit card or other accounts in both names, would be a good idea to get husband off .

best of luck


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