# I just need to hear something anything 2try to help me make sense of all this please!



## Rnewton (Mar 29, 2011)

Hi Im completely new 2all this! But heres tha deal Ive been married for the last 3yrs Ive wanted a divorce for the majority of those 3 years...but now im sooo fed up everytime we split or i get close I always hear somethin from somewhere give it a chance all marriages r ruff it takes time! yall can work it out....well im beyond fed up my husband does not work he has hardly worked the whole time weve been together! He half way takes care of our 3kids when Im workin, he kinda cleans mostly the kitchen and cooking that classifies as a clean house to him! hah...Im not in love with him nemore! Im scared to b alone 3kids wth will i do!!! and with no help!? I still love him I believe I love everyone!  But I dont want him I hav no desire.....I wish hed change straighten up and thats y hes still here plus he kinda refuses to leave! and if he did im sure it could work!!! but well this is my problem im bak and forth back and forth! I do kno for sure im fed up and I think this marriage was over way b4 it ever began!


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## Prodigal (Feb 5, 2011)

After reading your post, I guess my only question is why are you really sticking it out? For the sake of the children? It sounds like you could make it on your own, even with three kids. In this economy, people are relying on friends and family to help them out - like taking turns babysitting or moving in with family for awhile to get oriented.

Sounds to me like you married a man you just don't love. It's not the best environment for kids, because they pick up on the lack of love between their parents.

I was married to a man who was frequently unemployed. The difference was, the economy was way better at that time. Right now, unemployment is a fact of life. Does your husband have a skill that makes him employable? Is he lazy? It sounds like he does something around the house. What reasons has he given for you for not working?

If he was gainfully employed, do you think you would find him more attractive, or do you think the marriage was just a bad choice from the beginning?


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## Rnewton (Mar 29, 2011)

I dont really know y im still doing any of it!!! He has been employed a few times with great opportunity but got fired, yes hes very lazy, and he does very little around the house or with the kids! its mainly just wat he wants to do all day....No him being employed wouldnt make me happy it would help financially but not fix our problems; he still has a bad attitude,mouth,hes controlling,obessive,and insecure! He makes me feel guilty when I tell him I want him to leave by throwing God in my face, but thats tha only time u hear him mention God...He refuses to leave currently is the main reason hes still here, I failed to mention that he did also cheat on me on my birthday last yr i found out 2months later...at first they both admited to it but now she says well im not sure i waz drunk and he says well i waz too drunk and i dont think it happened....he is emtionally abusive and mentally...idk im just miserable im unhappy everyday and we fight and he says hes trying ive told him even if he waz i kno he couldnt change ovr nite but theres very little to no improvement...jus feel like im trapped and fighting a losing battle....but to hear him say it im jus like my mother and tired of being with the same man and want to live in devilish ways....


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