# Reconciled but ...



## HugMe (Apr 14, 2012)

Lurked here for a while but am having a problem and I thought of you guys.

So just over a year ago my H had an EA with a woman online. Figured it out the day that my parents came for a visit what was happening, looked at his email and bam there it was. 

Now we had a bump or two but he was very interested in reconciliation. He did all of the things recommended here, still lets me see his phone, email etc at any time. Now I'm a geek so I know he could easily get a new email and hide it at work etc but he seems genuine and has in the last year won me back. Now I'm not saying we are perfect we make each other crazy here and there but we talk more.

So yay, what could be the problem?

I live online. We moved two years ago and I have no friends here and all of my friends are online. I have tried to make friends but being a geek I'm kind of shy and different from a lot of the people here. So the OW is in our online community.

She shows up in my twitter feed, as friends retweet her, she posts on the forums because she has no shame and probably wants to torture me. My husband has limited his exposure hugely to make me feel better, he has informed her (ccing me) that she is not to have anything to do with us at all. But she is still there and even retweets pictures of my H intermittently.

I've tried to just get over this person being there, our friends respecting her and I've even told a few close friends what happened (some cut her off some remained 'friendly' with her). 

I'm too the point of packing the whole thing in, quitting an online community that I love and is my sanity net because when someone mentions her, retweets her or quotes her it makes me nuts. And I don't like being nuts.

Short of her dying accidentally I don't see her going away. The level of absolute hate that I have for this person is not logical. 

How do I get past this, preferably without losing my online friends.


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## Mr Blunt (Jul 18, 2012)

1st Find another online community and PM your friends and tell them to join you there also. Tell them to make sure to not tell the OW.

2nd Email your friends and communicate that way----make sure everyone knows to leave out OW

3rd	*There are ways to get rid of absolute hate. *You are not the only one that has absolute hate and you can be helped substantially. If you cannot get rid of that absolute hate by yourself then get help from others NOW!! This is more important than your internet activities

If you do not get help then maybe you get some satisfaction out of hate.


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