# Trying new things in the bedroom, be ready for them not to work right a way...



## marcopoly69 (Sep 7, 2010)

Well, last night, finally we tried the fantacy with a dildo and some anal play and do some sort of of DP. It did not work the way I had pictured in my head. I knew that it was a possibility because it was de first time...my wife seems to enjoy the dildo as she did not complain and felt good.....but the anal part did not work as she never took me in not even half a way...the reason?, I did not prepare her right (in the past she has taken me in but never really felt pain free), for the anal part to work, you need to start incerting small dildo or butt plug so the muscles relax while you make love so when the righ time comes for the switch, she has a better chance to take you in and enjoy herself -thing we did not do....I was nervous as I did not know how much she was going to allow...next time, I'll try to prepare her enough to see if I can be succesful in making her cum in a sort of DP.....

.....so for those of you that want to try new things in the bedroom and have a good relationship to get to this point, please keep in mind that probably won't work the way you have pictured in you head...and this is ok as perfect requires practice...it is important not to get discouraged as if you are doing it is because is the righ time in your relationship and because having the possibility, excites you ....and appriciate your partner for trying and let it happen......so, the question is....how much variaty it is required in your sex life to feel coplete?....is such as thing as a maximum you should aim to?...or for ever, you can be trying to improve different sex practices?


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

Marco,

Do you need me to tell you? 

You men are just curious little creatures, it is good that your wife let you try and now you find out it isn't that great. 

I let my husband try new things, sometimes we like the new stuff we tried, so we continue with it. Sometimes we don't like what we tried, so we never try it again. At least I satisfied his curiosity, he is grateful. He loves me that I let him try. 

Still, what he loves me the most is my puxxx. By the way, he also loves my brain and my heart.

You are cute................

Did you dance for her?????


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## marcopoly69 (Sep 7, 2010)

greenpearl said:


> Marco,
> 
> Do you need me to tell you?
> 
> ...


Thanks Greenpearl, I did not dance for her, but I took care of her very much!....we kissed and rubbed.....then we made love until she came and I ejaculate (without orgasm) and then we made love some more until I asked her about switching, she said ok righ a way, but between being nerveous about the dildo and not knowing how to do it, I think I may have hurt her a bit with the dildo as this morning she said she has some disconfort (we just made love half an hour ago again...this morning she is sleeping know).....I just want her to explote with pleasure and satisfaction....althought a dissapoinment from my side, I have to concentrate in the positive - she let me use the dildo on her and she enjoy it but I think I was kind of ruff.....I need to learn how she may like it the most in the way I fu...k her with it....it was hot though!...but still not what I want to experience.....time to time.....like my wife says, with time and love we can do everything...have a good day my friend (greenpearl)


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## malmale (Oct 5, 2010)

it doenst matter if it did not turn out ok, what's more important is that both are willing to try, and even laugh it off for mistakes made


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## Catherine602 (Oct 14, 2010)

It's nice to see that you are concerned not to proceed if it hurts her. One was to really insure that she will try again is to give her control of how much she takes speed every thing. If she says it hurts stop right away. That gives her control and she is far more likely to try this and many other things if she knows that you are concerned enough to put her in control. That's where she should be as the person who is likely to be hurt. Just make it clear to her that your aim is that she never hurts. 

Don't be so concerned that she will let you do it again Marco - your head is in the wrong place. Your concern should be - never to hurt your wife for your pleasure. That is consistent with love. I you are thinking wrong because of your natural tendency to be impatient (you said remember) and a concern that she will not want to go through with it. 

Keep telling yourself that you want this to last and if your impatient you will both suffer a set back. It's better to take weeks of trying and slowly progressing to get to the final stages than to rush things and have her feel that you are more worried about getting what you want and not mutual enjoyment.

I know you love her and it is not your intent to hurt her but I am just telling you how it may seem to her. Woman don't forget hurt like men do so be careful to give her a break and let her know it's because you want to make sure that she is ok. 

So be careful, go even slower than you are, stop right away if she has pain. Express your concern and sooth her and then, do as you are doing, find a solution. But you should slow down now and build upon her pleasure. If she liked the dildo just do that for now don't rush into to double penetration for a while. 

What's the hurry? If you hurry and picks up that you just want to do the act and she does not matter, she will begin to refuse. 

Marco I said before that woman take a while to react, she is trying very hard to please you but she may not tell you how she feels when you rush or seem too in a hurry and you hurt her. She may mull it over, let you continue and if you do not seemed concerned about her enough her resentment will exceed her desire to please you. I say that from a woman's point of view. I don't say all woman are like me but many are. I wanted to tell you from one woman's point of view since I know that is the feed back you are looking for. Even if your wife is OK and is not thinking anything like what I am saying - slow down just for insurance.

Men are confused by some of the things we do and don't do, but there is nothing confusing really, we just try for a long time to react and expect that the man will love to look out for us even if he is on some pleasure pursuit. The woman has to feel she matters. If she begins to feel used, you are sunk, it may be hard to convince her otherwise. SLOW DOWN. 

But you are both doing great


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

Catherine602 said:


> It's nice to see that you are concerned not to proceed if it hurts her. One was to really insure that she will try again is to give her control of how much she takes speed every thing. If she says it hurts stop right away. That gives her control and she is far more likely to try this and many other things if she knows that you are concerned enough to put her in control. That's where she should be as the person who is likely to be hurt. Just make it clear to her that your aim is that she never hurts.
> 
> Don't be so concerned that she will let you do it again Marco - your head is in the wrong place. Your concern should be - never to hurt your wife for your pleasure. That is consistent with love. I you are thinking wrong because of your natural tendency to be impatient (you said remember) and a concern that she will not want to go through with it.
> 
> ...


I am a woman, I agree with you. 

Actually a loving husband lets the wife control the speed. We tried anal, my husband let me push my way into his cxxx. He would have stopped at any time if I called quit, I didn't since I love my husband so much, I wanted to find out how painful and how enjoyable it was. We proceeded, it took him quite a while to come by doing anal. He didn't like the scream I had, he knew that I didn't enjoy it much. I would still try if he wants. but my husband said no since it isn't a big deal, I have satisfied his curiosity, it is enough for him. He is quite thankful to me for letting him try. He tells me my puxxx is wonderful enough for him. 

We are trying new things as time passes by, my husband always says that sex is not just about himself, sex is also about him pleasing me. Both of us have to enjoy it. If I enjoy the way he is doing, he continues doing it. If I don't enjoy, he stops right away. He tries very hard to satisfy me sexually. In return, I try very hard to please him also.


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## marcopoly69 (Sep 7, 2010)

Catherine602 said:


> It's nice to see that you are concerned not to proceed if it hurts her. One was to really insure that she will try again is to give her control of how much she takes speed every thing. If she says it hurts stop right away. That gives her control and she is far more likely to try this and many other things if she knows that you are concerned enough to put her in control. That's where she should be as the person who is likely to be hurt. Just make it clear to her that your aim is that she never hurts.
> 
> Don't be so concerned that she will let you do it again Marco - your head is in the wrong place. Your concern should be - never to hurt your wife for your pleasure. That is consistent with love. I you are thinking wrong because of your natural tendency to be impatient (you said remember) and a concern that she will not want to go through with it.
> 
> ...


Thanks for your words / advise - I agree with everything and you are right I was already thinking it may happen today again...when I should be backing off for a while and ask her next time while making love - at the moment I know she just had her first orgasms - if she wants to enjoy the dildo while I kiss her everywhere - next time is going to be about her....I'll do my best to find the right moves with the dildo so I can give her an orgasm that way....en then she can take care of me....we'll see but yes, I'll wait and ask and respect.....thanks again...I appriciate your advise since it sounds very logic!


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## marcopoly69 (Sep 7, 2010)

greenpearl said:


> I am a woman, I agree with you.
> 
> Actually a loving husband lets the wife control the speed. We tried anal, my husband let me push my way into his cxxx. He would have stopped at any time if I called quit, I didn't since I love my husband so much, I wanted to find out how painful and how enjoyable it was. We proceeded, it took him quite a while to come by doing anal. He didn't like the scream I had, he knew that I didn't enjoy it much. I would still try if he wants. but my husband said no since it isn't a big deal, I have satisfied his curiosity, it is enough for him. He is quite thankful to me for letting him try. He tells me my puxxx is wonderful enough for him.
> 
> We are trying new things as time passes by, my husband always says that sex is not just about himself, sex is also about him pleasing me. Both of us have to enjoy it. If I enjoy the way he is doing, he continues doing it. If I don't enjoy, he stops hard to satisfy me sexually. In return, I try very hard to please him also.


Thanks for your example....so it is about experimenting but finding the things that both of you can enjoy or one of you can enjoy but the other is fine with it....the idea is making sure there is no pressure, lots of love, laghter and cuddling....I'll let you know how things go next time we play with the dildo - hopefully, this time will be mind blowing for her.....


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## marcopoly69 (Sep 7, 2010)

malmale said:


> it doenst matter if it did not turn out ok, what's more important is that both are willing to try, and even laugh it off for mistakes made


That's true....if you can try new things, and talk about them, then they become familiar and, thus, familiar things are always welcome....so patients, love, laghter, talking about them in a no big deal way about how it works and what it doesnt it is the only way to achieve this level of intimacy in a relationship.....:smthumbup:


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

marcopoly69 said:


> Thanks for your example....so it is about experimenting but finding the things that both of you can enjoy or one of you can enjoy but the other is fine with it....the idea is making sure there is no pressure, lots of love, laghter and cuddling....I'll let you know how things go next time we play with the dildo - hopefully, this time will be mind blowing for her.....


Yeah! you got it. 

Good boy! 

I am waiting for your happy sex report. 

If your wife likes it tremendously, I am going to buy a dildo and have a try, too.


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## marcopoly69 (Sep 7, 2010)

greenpearl said:


> Yeah! you got it.
> 
> Good boy!
> 
> ...


Well, the first time, she enjoyed it very much - I can tell - the problem is that instead in concentrating on her and making sure I move the dildo right and at the same time may be liking her clit and / or kissing her neck and stomach, etc, I try to do DP and it never worked (was nervous and she was very tied - no prep what so ever)....next time it will be about her...trying to read her and see how her level of excitement grows and grows until reaching orgasm -this would be a very nice things as she's never masturbated so it would be the first time she would cum from stimulation not from my penis or tongue but from a dildo.....anyway, I'll try me best....greenpearl if you go for the dildo, let me recommend you the one I got for my wife as it is my size!....:rofl::rofl:


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## Idontknownow (Sep 30, 2010)

What's DP?


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

Idontknownow said:


> What's DP?


Double penetration!


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## Idontknownow (Sep 30, 2010)

aaah.


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## malmale (Oct 5, 2010)

greenpearl said:


> Double penetration!


goodness! LOL
yall shud at least come out with a list of abbrevations!


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## Idontknownow (Sep 30, 2010)

malmale said:


> goodness! LOL
> yall shud at least come out with a list of abbrevations!


:iagree:


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## Catherine602 (Oct 14, 2010)

greenpearl said:


> I am a woman, I agree with you.
> 
> Actually a loving husband lets the wife control the speed. We tried anal, my husband let me push my way into his cxxx. He would have stopped at any time if I called quit, I didn't since I love my husband so much, I wanted to find out how painful and how enjoyable it was. We proceeded, it took him quite a while to come by doing anal. He didn't like the scream I had, he knew that I didn't enjoy it much. I would still try if he wants. but my husband said no since it isn't a big deal, I have satisfied his curiosity, it is enough for him. He is quite thankful to me for letting him try. He tells me my puxxx is wonderful enough for him.
> 
> We are trying new things as time passes by, my husband always says that sex is not just about himself, sex is also about him pleasing me. Both of us have to enjoy it. If I enjoy the way he is doing, he continues doing it. If I don't enjoy, he stops right away. He tries very hard to satisfy me sexually. In return, I try very hard to please him also.


You are so fortunate to have such a wonderful husband. Be careful though never suffer in silence, i am certain if you were injured, he would be extremely upset. So take care.


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