# Helping a friend



## Tomara (Jun 19, 2013)

Discovery of a long affair x 2. Has cell phone, computer, iPad,passwords. Already taken under ground because she found a burner phone. Besides the obvious std testing how can I help her. He has done this before but she rug sweep. They are starting counseling and don't know if she wants to R.
She needs to go into stealth mode.
How do you recover deleted texts and emails on an iPhone 5. 
What is the best VAR. 
other websites that will assist her in pulling info.......yes she asked me for this kind of help this time. 

Any help I can provide her would be greatly appreciated.


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## ReidWright (May 15, 2014)

serial cheater?

just give her the number of a good divorce lawyer.


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## Tomara (Jun 19, 2013)

If it were me and it has been, I agree a divorce is all I could do. She is not of my personality however.........she wants more information even though I told her it will hurt even more. I want to help her.


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## weightlifter (Dec 14, 2012)

All the tech answers are in the top link in my signature.
If hes a serial cheater, not sure why reconcile.


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

weightlifter said:


> All the tech answers are in the top link in my signature.
> *If hes a serial cheater, not sure why reconcile.*


For reals. He's not going to stop.


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## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

I guess if it helps her to move on that she knows the details then help her.


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## Tomara (Jun 19, 2013)

People have to work through things best they can when hit with this. I just want to help her the best I can. She is leaning toward D but it's all new and she is trying to process.


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## Chris Taylor (Jul 22, 2010)

Seriously? Send her to TAM. Sometimes people won't listen to advice from those close to them, but reading story after story here and the good advice she can get here, TAM is a good place for her to start.


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## Tomara (Jun 19, 2013)

If have all ready mentioned this site......


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Invite her to TAM.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Young at Heart (Jan 6, 2015)

Tomara said:


> ....Any help I can provide her would be greatly appreciated.


Give her one of MW Davis Divorce Busting books or one about cheating husbands.

Tell her to talk to a really good divorce attorney so she has a plan to protect herself financially, if he decides to divorce. This is especially important if they have children.

Tell her to get some individual counselling either from a minister or a therapist. It will help her to talk about it and there may be things she is too embarrised to tell you that she needs to get off her chest.

Tell her to start exercising as it is a way of dealing with depression and a way of getting herself in shape for whatever the future brings.
This will help her start her Get a Life program which MW Davis recommends. 

Encourage her to do something really out of the box and her normal area of comfort as part of a Get a Life program. It can give her a new sense of confidence and self. This could be taking a martial arts class, firearms training, belly dancing, salsa dancing, nude figure drawing, or something she will not do with her husband, but will make him uncomfortable and wonder who this different woman is.

Good luck to your friend.


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