# divorced parents with two kids getting back together



## deg820 (Aug 12, 2011)

My ex wife and I are exploring getting back together. We have two girls young 6, 9 years old. The younger of the two is very happy the older one is not. We live about 500 miles apart now and they would have to move with me. Now my ex wife is thinking that it may not be a good idea now I disagree but don't want to let her know this. I think that the short term will be difficult for everyone but the long term is good for all 4 of us. What to do?????


----------



## Ten_year_hubby (Jun 24, 2010)

deg820 said:


> My ex wife and I are exploring getting back together. We have two girls young 6, 9 years old. The younger of the two is very happy the older one is not. We live about 500 miles apart now and they would have to move with me. Now my ex wife is thinking that it may not be a good idea now I disagree but don't want to let her know this. I think that the short term will be difficult for everyone but the long term is good for all 4 of us. What to do?????


The sooner you get back together, the better things will be for your kids, both now and especially in their future. There is really only one place for future adults to learn about family relationships and like it or not, you and your wife are the teachers. Show them what you're willing to do for them, even if not for yourselves.


----------



## deg820 (Aug 12, 2011)

yes but what do i do 2 get my ex 2 agree wit me that this will b good 4 all of us, because she thinks if our one girl is not sure about it we should not do it eventhow she wants to come back 2 me 2!!???


----------



## Syrum (Feb 22, 2011)

No kids like leaving their friends and comfort zones and moving. however that is not for 9 year olds to decide. it shouldn't have even been presented as a choice to her, she is 9 and if you and her mum decide it's best then it's best.

That doesn't mean dismissing her concerns completely, but having her parents together and both present is a really wonderful thing to be doing for her.


----------



## deg820 (Aug 12, 2011)

Yes but what or how do I present it to wife so that she can understand it and so I don't sound like I am being so dismissive of kid’s feelings and wife’s??


----------



## Ten_year_hubby (Jun 24, 2010)

deg820 said:


> Yes but what or how do I present it to wife so that she can understand it and so I don't sound like I am being so dismissive of kid’s feelings and wife’s??


You may want to put some real effort into creating an offer where your wife and daughter each feel they are getting something they want in return for what they are giving up.


----------



## deg820 (Aug 12, 2011)

like what??


----------



## deg820 (Aug 12, 2011)

now my daughter is ok with moveing and my wife wants to wate till Nov. 2 move so that she can finsh the season @ her job(seasonal job) any thoughts???


----------



## sprinter (Jul 25, 2011)

Maybe that's not a bad idea. It's a compromise at least. But certainly stay in close touch.November isn't that far off.


----------

