# Why (seemingly) women more pro marriage than men?



## morituri (Apr 1, 2011)

Of course I don't believe the title by why does society paints it this way?


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

I actually do believe it, and it makes sense.

Women bear the burden of pregnancy and childbirth. Additionally, in any given relationship involving a mother, a father, and children, it's almost a certainty that the mother -- having carried each of her children in her womb for the 9-10 months of pregnancy -- will be more attached to the children than the father will be. (You'll notice, by the way, that I said _more_ -- not _much more_.)

So, if I'm a woman, and I'm going to agree to go through ^all of that^ for a guy, then I want to go through it _with_ said guy... so it would be nice to know that he values me enough to "put a ring on it".


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

There was a time when just about the only thing a woman could do with her life was to get married. So of course young women looked to get married to start out their own life.

and any unmarried older woman (widowed maybe?), looked to get married because again, it was the way she could be sure to have enough to live on.

In todays world, I think it's often different. I think that often its the guy who wants to get married.

It has always been the guys in my life who brought up marriage and pushed for it. Sadly I fell for it. should have known better.


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## morituri (Apr 1, 2011)

EleGirl said:


> In todays world, I think it's often different. I think that often its the guy who wants to get married.
> 
> It has always been the guys in my life who brought up marriage and pushed for it. Sadly I fell for it. should have known better.


I do believe there is some truth to this.

My youngest daughter was not keen in getting married but she did so because of her pregnancy. I told her she would have my support with the baby if her boyfriend didn't want anything to do with him/her. Yet her boyfriend stepped up to the plate and asked her and my, hand in marriage. Though I was impressed, he contributed to my daughter and granddaughter's well being. THAT in my POV is what matters.


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## Alli3fire (Oct 23, 2016)

I agree that that's just not the case anymore. I know more men that are anxious to get married than women.


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## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

Actually this seems like a very true thing that I have seen. Granted we are speaking in generalities but here is what I have noticed. Women are often asked, as part of status, what kind of relationship they have where men are more often asked what kind of job they have. So society associates realtioships with women it seems. And if you are associated with relationships and the top of the food chain is marriage than you can quickly see how that becomes an end goal for many women.

Any given day you can read 5 or so relationship rants or relationship meme on my Facebook and I don't even know that many people lol. All women. Guys never talk about this stuff. It's all hobbies and careers, both equally talk about kids. So I think they are pro marriage because society puts it on them to be so to some degree. I do think that is changing...slowly


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## Mr.Fisty (Nov 4, 2014)

Funny thing. I looked up the marriage rates of lesbians and homosexual males. Lesbians are twice as likely to get married, males are twice as likely to be in an open relationship. Stats from different countries and cultures have near identical results.

With neuro imaging, when females mate, they bond at much of a highe level, with their brains more engage. Genetically, the gene that promotes promiscuous behavior is near identical for both males and females with males a few percentage higher.

Lesbian marriages have a 14% divorce rate that is nearly universal while gay marriages have a 7% divorce rate. apparently oxytocin, the main bonding hormone for females, has been known to also destroy bonds as well as create them. Vasopressin, the male bonding hormone has been shown to help cause feelings of possessiveness and increase mate guarding behavior when increased.

interestingly enough, females are the more likely one to fall in love in open relationships. It is something I quite noticed from experience, and other forums. For example, when semen is released in the vagina, and absorb through the vaginal walls, increase levels of oxytocin and endorphins are released. For males, it is more about the reward center that is why males tend to think about sex a lot more often and develop fetishes at a higher rate.


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

It may be worth separating "marriage" and "long term commitments". My impression is that the laws around marriage tend to provide more benefits for women than for men, so even if they had the same level of interest in long term relationships, women might be more likely to prefer marriage.


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## Bananapeel (May 4, 2015)

There is still a social stigma attached to women being single vs married. Also, I think that many women have a fear that their best years will pass without them finding a suitable partner and the number of good males will drastically decrease. Whether any of this is actually true depends a lot on the individual.


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

EleGirl said:


> There was a time when just about the only thing a woman could do with her life was to get married. So of course young women looked to get married to start out their own life.
> 
> and any unmarried older woman (widowed maybe?), looked to get married because again, it was the way she could be sure to have enough to live on.
> 
> ...


Awe, don't say that.

If they valued you enough to [want to] marry you, you must have those qualities that a man needs. Don't blame the men here. They knew a good thing when they [met] you, face to face and.........fill in the blanks. Too bad they fell short when the trail got rough and the trail went the distance.

Courting needs to be longer. Engagements need to be longer. 

Some men cannot wait....take a chance that another dude will steal the heart of his beloved. No waiting. Get her now.....to the altar. I did this!

Take the *sadly* out of it. I know, your picker was faulty, the lens fogged over with bodily and mental [heat generated] fervor. You trusted your heart, not your rationality. Fate failed you...too!

Be grateful that you are desirable.


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## tech-novelist (May 15, 2014)

Because marriage in today's western culture is extremely hazardous for men, whereas it is not nearly as hazardous for women.

Before anyone objects that some women are mistreated by their husbands, I know that is true.

But in general, these days men are much more *likely *to be mistreated by their wives than vice versa, largely because women are *generally *benefited by current marriage-related laws (divorce, alimony, child support) whereas men *generally *are not.

Thus, men are more reluctant to marry than women are.


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## Cosmos (May 4, 2012)

I've been proposed to many times, but have never proposed. 

I've been divorced and single for over 30 years, whereas my ex is now onto W number 3.

I'm currently engaged to be married, but in no hurry to tie the knot.

I'm a woman and I've never had the remotest burning desire to be married ;-)


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