# So the moronic judge deferred my case again...



## Aniseed Toffee (Jan 27, 2014)

Hello.

The replies are more important than the thread itself and lenzi and others pretty much quoted everything anyway. 

I might want to print them and the quotes waste ink.

Since "nobody cares", I don't see it as a problem. So I deleted my posts and the responses are still visible.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

Aniseed Toffee said:


> Yes. After going to court on 19 December, I had the stupid damn case deferred yet again, this time until 20 March.


That's typical. That means you can't even get your laptop back. That blows. 



Aniseed Toffee said:


> If you don't remember who or what I'm talking about here, I no longer care because you are not in my position


I remember who or what you're talking about. So does that mean you care? I'm still not in your position. 



Aniseed Toffee said:


> After screwing me over, there is *NO WAY* I'm going to just let it slide between the agency and myself.


What are you going to do to the agency?



Aniseed Toffee said:


> I did not deserve this


Well you sort of do deserve it. According to your prior posts, you've repeatedly violated court orders, harassed your case workers, crossed boundaries, stalked them near their houses, and you hit a woman in the street. 



Aniseed Toffee said:


> these support workers are not helping me anymore.


They've reached their limit. They tried to help you but all you do is blame everyone other than yourself for all the problems. It's obvious from your prior posts that you are the one responsible from being kicked out of your flat and losing your female support workers because you were inappropriate with them, you harassed them despite court orders, and you hit a woman in the street.


Aniseed Toffee said:


> All they f-ing do in fact is just make excuses now to get off the phone


They don't want to help you. They want nothing to do with you. I'm actually surprised they just don't hang up on you. Probably because they're afraid of you.



Aniseed Toffee said:


> they chose to stay at home that morning instead of supporting me over the crap _they_ caused.


They aren't the ones who broke the law by violating court orders. That was you.



Aniseed Toffee said:


> Idiots. They are lying con artists and no-one on the spectrum deserves to be going through all this BS.


You made your bed. Now you gotta lie on it.

I'd like to think you learned something from this ordeal but you haven't. Which means you're doomed to repeat those same mistakes. At least wherever you are right now, it's not jail. At least, not yet.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

Aniseed Toffee said:


> It was the court granting the restraining orders and strict rules NOT to go to the flat or that street any longer. So thanks to those wig wearing jackasses, I am still stranded with my parents indefinitely, or at least until I can find another place to live.


I don't have a restraining order or strict rules not to go to the flat or that street. In fact most of the people on this planet don't have strict rules or orders not to go to that flat or street any longer. But you, Peter, DO have strict rules for not going back there. And that's because people are afraid of you and see you as a threat. And your own decisions and actions have put you there. 



Aniseed Toffee said:


> And yes. This is _totally_ my fault for having developed boyish feelings for them


You developed feelings for them. Not really your fault, it just sort of happened. But you took it further. You started holding their hands, and you let yourself get caught up in this fantasy that you would have a relationship with them. They felt uncomfortable, you were asked repeatedly to stop it and you couldn't help yourself so they took matters into their own hands because you couldn't do it on your own.



Aniseed Toffee said:


> and being lied to about their abrupt absence from my shifts and not just shrugging off the fact the seniors who make the support schedule are lying jerks


They lied to avoid having a confrontation with you because they're afraid of you and your actions are unpredictable. Totally makes sense.



Aniseed Toffee said:


> the females named in my charges wanted to have nothing to do with me, all because I had a crush on them


It's more than you just having a crush on them. It's the harassing, the stalking, the threats that you "know where they live", the hitting of a woman in the street.



Aniseed Toffee said:


> then I simply wanted to say sorry for being stupid


No one wants to hear your apology Peter. They just want to be left alone. Stop thinking of yourself for once, and give them what they want. Leave them alone. Try not to be so selfish.



Aniseed Toffee said:


> so again in your view, it was not _actually_ my place to speak up or act out in anger.


Right. You've done plenty. It's no longer your place to speak up or act out in anger. Cut your losses, wait out the restraining order then go live your life and stop bothering these people with attempted apologies or acting out in anger.



Aniseed Toffee said:


> It was as if, 'OK, your support people are gone. You can like it or lump it, but it is better to like it, for if you try to get them back or you break the law along the way on your ridiculous little "quest", Peter, your skinny little butt is going to Saughton whether your good intentions are meaningful or not'.


Yes that's exactly what it is. I think you got it!



Aniseed Toffee said:


> Yes, that hardly seems rational or what one may call "fair".


Oh, I guess you don't get it since you say it's hardly rational. Well, that's your problem Peter.



Aniseed Toffee said:


> They did lie and they did prevent me from duking it out with them to get to the bottom of why they changed towards me.


Yeah, they didn't want to fight with you. They took your support works away and they want you to accept their decision and stop challenging them. From what I read, they made the right call. 



Aniseed Toffee said:


> After being a positive part of my life, it was cruel to finalize this.


Right, they should keep subjecting their female caregivers to your abusive behavior because it's cruel to take them away from you. See how selfish you are? It's all about you.



Aniseed Toffee said:


> There were other options.


The only other option is to lock you up and give you a chance to think about it. Oh wait they did that already and it didn't work.



Aniseed Toffee said:


> They meant something to me. That should account for something. Right?


What they meant to you is meaningless. They aren't your possessions. They're people. They don't have to deal with you.

At all.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

Learn to take no for an answer.


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## Starstarfish (Apr 19, 2012)

> They did lie and they did prevent me from duking it out with them to get to the bottom of why they changed towards me.


And I'm guessing after you accosted a woman, they were concerned that you might "duke it out" literally. And what exactly would any of them have said that would have many you accept their answer? "Peter, the sex jokes creeped me out." "Peter, I appreciate your feelings, but I don't reciprocate?"

What were you hoping, you could brow beat them into how them not feeling comfortable was "taking a dumb on your trust" so that they should simply deal with feeling really uncomfortable so you didn't have to feel bad?


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## Starstarfish (Apr 19, 2012)

> Also, did it ever occur to you I have mental scars stemming from all of this mess? Maybe I did not want anyone to cancel them out of my life like that. Could it be that?


It could be that for your side of the equation. But from their employer's side what you say now in explanation for your intentions doesn't really factor into it. They likely grew concerned for these women's safety.



> Do you know that if the two ladies never forgave me, I would have to live with that regret for good? Someday, they will move on and if I never got that chance to undo my misdeeds, they would be out of my life forever and there may never be a recourse.


Even if they forgave you on a personal level, they would likely be prevented legally, professionally, or morally from working with you again. There are situations where "I'm sorry" just doesn't erase what happened. 




> If they do not get back on the same page as me, there will be no hope in hell of me recovering, me going back to the flat or me gaining any positive outcome other than waiting out my postponed hearing and getting the charges dropped.


And in all fairness, as unfortunate as it might be, that's the most likely outcome. I'm not really sure I can think of a way that you can indeed, explain your intentions in a way that will indeed seem less creepy and lead to a positive outcome of them wanting to come back and work with you.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

Aniseed Toffee said:


> When I said 'duking it out', that is not to be literally taken as I want to assault someone. It simply means I want to resolve a matter by conflicting about it verbally.
> 
> I have never willingly abused anybody from the agency


You hit a woman in the street in front of someone else from the agency.

Close enough


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

Aniseed Toffee said:


> So, what about my flat? Will there be a problem winning an appeal?


What grounds are you basing your appeal on? Do you have a lawyer? 

C


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## Cooper (Apr 18, 2008)

I think posting pictures of someone who has a restraining order against you isn't going to sit very well with the "moronic judge" that eventually hears your case.

Nor do I think the moderators for this site will tolerate it.


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## FrenchFry (Oct 10, 2011)

Do not put up pictures of anyone who has a restraining order against you. What a terrible idea.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

Aniseed Toffee said:


> They could have handled the situation(s) much better, when the issues *FIRST* started.


When the issue first started, they probably let it slide a bit because they were concerned for you. Then, when things got worse, and you admitted feelings for the caseworkers, and you started holding their hands, and started talking about pornographic movies and stalking them in their homes, they were concerned for the safety of the caseworkers so they finally pulled the plug. Swiftly, and effectively. 



Aniseed Toffee said:


> My mother says I need to fight this another way and not get urges to contact them again, as A, they will not care and B, I would just go back to jail after they grass me up to the Blue Meanies once again.


That's not fighting it another way. That's letting it go and moving on with your life and it's a real good idea.



Aniseed Toffee said:


> My sister just wishes they had their recent confession down in writing


Doesn't matter that they may have deceived you about the reasons behind removing your caseworkers. Heck they could have gotten up in front of the judge and said "Yes your honor, we pulled the caseworkers off of Peter's case and we weren't upfront to him about it because we were concerned for their safety and ours" and you know what Peter? The judge would have probably been ok with it. 



Aniseed Toffee said:


> I hope you realize I will have major difficulty trusting anybody again for the rest of my life, whether it is around support workers or anybody else.


No one cares.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

You reported a forum to their hosting provider and tried to get them shut down because they temporarily banned you?

Wow that's messed up.

And yes you're completely to blame for your problems.

From your post on one of the other forums:



> Someone called "lenzi" on talkaboutmarriage.com ended his last post to me in my newest thread with 'No one cares' when I told the members the impact the lies will have on me for the rest of my life and how it could greatly affect my approach to being open with new people I encounter, and that is all he had to say.


Unfortunately, it's true. No one cares, you're on your own. And you have become your own worst enemy because of your own actions and your inability to realize this and learn from your mistakes. All you do is blame everyone else, and where is that going to get you?

And your comment that was "all I had to say" is a bit of an understatement, don't you think? I've responded to your threads with a lot of useful advice.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

Aniseed Toffee said:


> Did you actually read all the posts? They are not all to do with my former support workers. What about my old flame and the online harassment?


Yeah I glanced at the other posts.

It's pretty much the same thing over and over again, you're whining because it's just not fair how people treat you.

My advice, again: Go somewhere and have a good cry, own your mistakes, realize no one is going to suddenly show up and make things right for you, and move on with your life.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

Aniseed Toffee said:


> So are you saying it's my fault I got banned on over 100 forums, humiliated by people, used for my money, sent to prison twice and then betrayed by the support agency before I was due up in court, and that it's all because of what "I" did?


Yes, that's exactly right.



Aniseed Toffee said:


> You must think I am being all 'woe-is-me' here for to gain your pity.


You've got "victim mentality".

Google it when you're not busy getting banned from forums and from your house and from support workers and when you're not in jail.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

Aniseed Toffee said:


> How is this all my fault? Do you mind explaining it in better detail?


You have boundary issues and you don't listen to what other people are telling you.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

Aniseed Toffee said:


> Dude, that still doesn't really explain why I keep getting this all over the Internet and in real life.


Sure it does. Why do you think you keep getting this all over the Internet and in real life and no one else does?



Aniseed Toffee said:


> So do you think me getting used for my money was my fault


Yeah, you were really gullible. You even admitted in your posts that you KNOW she used you and yet you STILL consider her your ex girlfriend and you miss her and would even go back out with her again even after everything she did to you.



Aniseed Toffee said:


> Actually take a bit of time to point out as to _why_ you think this is all my fault when you don't even mention any of _what_ other people did.


Everything other people did was in response to your actions. You started it, they finished it. If you hadn't started it, you wouldn't have gotten the backlash.

If you followed the instructions of the forum moderators you wouldn't have been banned from over 100 forums.

If you weren't so gullible then Laura could not have used you as she did.

If you hadn't scared your caseworkers and tried holding their hands and talking about pornographic movies and stalking them outsider their homes, they wouldn't have been pulled off your case.

If you had listened to the judge and not violated the restraining order you wouldn't have gone to jail.

If you had followed court orders you wouldn't have been evicted from your flat.

See the pattern here?

It really is that simple.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

Aniseed Toffee said:


> So what about the trolls putting up that sad page about me and the older support guy pretending to know Laura all over? What was that about then?


Well I can't speak for others, but my guess?

You really pissed them off and they're retaliating.

Or

They got really frustrated with you because you don't listen to advice offered and you keep asking the same questions over and over again so they're acting out.

Or

They see you as weak and vulnerable so they're picking on you because it gives them a sense of power and boosts their own self esteem to make other people feel bad.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

Aniseed Toffee said:


> And what about the guy that used an alias and emailed me garbage from Gumtree? That was an offense worthy of getting him sacked.


Some people get away with stuff on obscure internet discussion forums. Others get banned for reasons they deem unfair.

It's all at the discretion of the moderators, and the moderators don't catch everything.

I know, it's not FAIR. Like I said, go have a good cry and move on.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

There's meds for that.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

Aniseed Toffee said:


> Mate, this was not just some random Internet nut job like all the others. This was a man (an older man who should have had some sense, might I add) who was a part of the support agency I went to years ago.
> 
> He took it upon himself to sign up as someone fake and email me insults when I was anxiously looking for Laura years ago.


So what? People are nuts, this guy was probably nuts as well. 



Aniseed Toffee said:


> If I could have nailed him at the time, he would have been in some hot water for taken advantage of a vulnerable adult such as myself.


Ok, you couldn't nail him. He got away with it. There's nothing you can do about it besides complaining incessantly. Let it go.

* * *

This is interesting: You say you've never lied on forums. 



Aniseed Toffee said:


> I have never lied about anything I posted on these forums up to this point and I ain't gonna start now.


But look here. You wrote this on one of the other forums that you linked on this thread. You say that "all I have to say" is that "no one cares".



> Someone called "lenzi" on talkaboutmarriage.com ended his last post to me in my newest thread with 'No one cares' when I told the members the impact the lies will have on me for the rest of my life and how it could greatly affect my approach to being open with new people I encounter, and that is all he had to say.


I have posted pages of responses to you and yet you tell the other people that was "all I have to say".

That makes you dishonest Peter. You lied. 

Everybody lies.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

Aniseed Toffee said:


> That was not an intentional lie, if that is what you want to call it, nor do consider it lying either; I only pointed out that you seemed a bit insensitive in your approach to what I had been through before, so I was a bit annoyed at the time, since a lot of your posts seemed like you were trying to take pot shots at me in order to try to pinpoint that I caused everything that happened to me and I was disputing the claim. If I had said he lies about all he posts to make me look bad, that would have been frivolous.


You lied, but it's ok (according to Peter) because

- it was unintentional
- I was insensitive in my approach
- you were annoyed
- it was a pot shot
- you were disputing a claim

In other words, it's ok for Peter to lie but not others, because he has what he thinks is good reason.

That's called a "double standard". Look that one up after you're done Googling "victim mentality".



Aniseed Toffee said:


> You did raise some good points, though.


I raise a lot of good points, you simply choose to overlook them.



Aniseed Toffee said:


> since there is bomb I can do about what happened _in the past_, I should really try to get over it and move on.


Bing Bing we have a winner!



Aniseed Toffee said:


> But I still would have liked to have had my flat back until I could find somewhere else to stay.


And I'd like to win 20 million bucks in the lottery. You can't always get what you want. 



Aniseed Toffee said:


> My father is a grumpy guts with diabetes and he hates me swearing in front of my nephew, but cussing is normal under pressure.


No, it's not normal to swear under pressure, you obviously have poor anger control, and you're abusing the privilege given to you by your father- he's giving you a place to stay and despite him being uncomfortable with your swearing, you do it anyway. If he kicks you out, you'll be posting all over the internet about how unfair it is.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

I think you're getting it.

Happy Holidays


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

Aniseed Toffee said:


> By the way, can posts be printed off on forums without all the adverts and surrounding graphics showing? That would waste a lot of ink. Like, is there a print friendly version of the thread available?


Don't know of any other way to print forum posts unless you copy and paste the text into a word document and print it that way. What do you need all the forum posts for? 



Aniseed Toffee said:


> it turns out I really am not meant to return there, ever.


Bummer. Better not piss your dad off with all that cussing.



Aniseed Toffee said:


> It's a problem if I need anything. I have a lot of DVDs and games plus their consoles at the flat and somebody else always has to go fetch what I need. There are things in carrier bags and they act lazy and cannot be bothered rummaging through them, but I said it was OK.


You oughta get someone over there to get all your stuff before it's thrown away. Since you can't ever go back, you better do it ASAP. No point in waiting.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

Good luck with that.


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## michzz (Jun 6, 2008)

lenzi said:


> Learn to take no for an answer.


This!!

Respect their wishes and figure out that you have been acting out of control inappropriately.


Then work to change your behavior. You need professional help to do this.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

Aniseed Toffee said:


> It makes me think they all just care about the money to be made, then leave.


They do care only about the money to be made. It's just a job to them. The caseworkers are afraid of you and the support company is doing what needs to be done to protect them from you.

Remember what I told you? Nobody cares about you Peter. They just want you to go away and stop bothering them and blaming them for things that are your fault.

And it seems like you're starting to figure that out on your own.

Good job.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

Aniseed Toffee said:


> Finally. I was starting to think lenzi and I were like Will Smith and his ill-fated mutt in that we were the only two here.
> 
> Well, OK. This damn site crashes every so often.


No one is posting on your threads (other than me and the occasional straggler) because no one cares.

I'm Will Smith and you're the ill-fated mutt.


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## Mr The Other (Feb 1, 2014)

We wish you well. However, Lenzi speaks for all of us.


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## Mr The Other (Feb 1, 2014)

Aniseed Toffee said:


> That post by lenzi was actually quite funny.
> 
> But I'd rather be Cujo from the Stephen King book. Cujo was one bad ass dog.


Sounds fair enough to me, mate!
:smthumbup:


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## Mr The Other (Feb 1, 2014)

Aniseed Toffee said:


> At least I can still appreciate good music from yesteryear, which is one thing the Internet comes in handy for. Today's music though is pants and all the kids are zealots for thinking it's actually any good. The best music was from the forties to the mid-1990s (in my opinion). The noughties was bland as hell because "nought" good came out very often and the twenty-tens just totally sucks ass. :scratchhead:
> 
> On topic: I have to insist on getting my flat back because I miss the peace and quiet...BADLY!


IMO, the best music is from when you were most excited about being alive. In twenty years time, men nudging forty will insist the music of the mid-2010's is unbeatable.

That said, it is good to have a variety. Have a good evening!


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## Aniseed Toffee (Jan 27, 2014)

Note: I decided to remove my posts as I wanted to print the thread and could not find a 'print only' version. User lenzi quoted much of what I posted anyway and it would look like I was printing the same things twice.


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