# The lack of Sex in marriage



## Lolati11 (Nov 29, 2017)

The last 3 years going on 4 we’ve had are share of challenges mainly with my step son getting in trouble .our sex life is almost none . It’s driving me crazy !! I’ve tried everything , from seducing him to talking about it . To getting angry about it with no luck  I asked him to go get checked out by a doctor . I don’t think he realizes how much this is affecting me . Tonight I told him once again that I would like to have sex point blank !! He was like that’s great me too and what does he do ? He goes to bed before me ( insert eye roll) . What else can I try ?


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## Personal (Jan 16, 2014)

You could stop wasting more years of your life to no end, and replace him with a man or men that want to have sex with you.

Or you could carry on doing the same thing to the same end interminably.

Either way, nothing is going to change until you finally stop doing the same thing.

Good luck, whatever you choose.


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## StarFires (Feb 27, 2018)

I'll suggest what I often suggest to other ladies with this problem. Make the doc appointment and drag him there. 

So my next door neighbor took my car once. I had a business at the time, and he would help me out on occasion. He was out making a delivery for me on this particular day. I had other pickups and deliveries to make and naturally expected him to come straight back. My car was a convertible, so he went joyriding (except it had MY name on the license plate). He was a good guy and great neighbor, so I honestly wouldn't have cared if I didn't need my car. I called him a couple times, but he was being very uncharacteristically obstinate and simply refused to return. To this day, I don't understand who that guy turned into. What did I do? I threatened to call his church and tell his pastor on him. LOL He came flying home then.

My point is it might work on your husband if you threaten to call and tell his doctor about this problem he's having. Some people can't stand for certain others to be privy to certain information. My neighbor was a junior pastor (minister in the making) and hated the idea of his fellow ministers, particularly his pastor, to know anything that might alter their esteem. It may well be something your husband is too embarrassed to address with his doctor, but he might be mortified if you discussed such a thing with his doctor, or mortified by the idea of you discussing it.

Try that and see what he does. Let us know if it works or not.

If you're pushed to calling his doctor yourself, you can discuss it with him and ask him to call and talk to your husband. Your husband will probably be more open to doc himself asking him to come in for a visit.


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## Tiredandconfused92 (Oct 11, 2020)

Sounds like low t. He for sure needs to be checked out by a doctor! This is very treatable and resolves quickly once they start a medication.


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

What is his age? I had to start Testtosterone Injection at 37. I was at a point where you could stand the Playmate calender in my living room and i would tell them they are blocking the TV. Lot T in men and women can have consequences but can be easily fixed.


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

Lolati11 said:


> Tonight I told him once again that I would like to have sex point blank !! He was like that’s great me too and what does he do ? He goes to bed before me ( insert eye roll) . What else can I try ?


So, you said you wanted sex. He said he also wanted sex. He went to bed. You did not follow? I think you might have missed your shot, there.

If I said I wanted sex on a weeknight and my DH said the same, then went to bed early, I'd figure he wants to have sex and has gone to bed early to make that possible on a week night what with having to get up to work and all.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

MJJEAN said:


> So, you said you wanted sex. He said he also wanted sex. He went to bed. You did not follow? I think you might have missed your shot, there.
> 
> If I said I wanted sex on a weeknight and my DH said the same, then went to bed early, I'd figure he wants to have sex and has gone to bed early to make that possible on a week night what with having to get up to work and all.


I thought that too.

That H went in early to have his W join him, but she dropped the ball at least in this case.


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## Lolati11 (Nov 29, 2017)

Ragnar Ragnasson said:


> I thought that too.
> 
> That H went in early to have his W join him, but she dropped the ball at least in this case.


I thought so too but he said he was tired and honestly I was too upset by then .


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## Lolati11 (Nov 29, 2017)

StarFires said:


> I'll suggest what I often suggest to other ladies with this problem. Make the doc appointment and drag him there.
> 
> So my next door neighbor took my car once. I had a business at the time, and he would help me out on occasion. He was out making a delivery for me on this particular day. I had other pickups and deliveries to make and naturally expected him to come straight back. My car was a convertible, so he went joyriding (except it had MY name on the license plate). He was a good guy and great neighbor, so I honestly wouldn't have cared if I didn't need my car. I called him a couple times, but he was being very uncharacteristically obstinate and simply refused to return. To this day, I don't understand who that guy turned into. What did I do? I threatened to call his church and tell his pastor on him. LOL He came flying home then.
> 
> ...


I love this making an appointment for him will work I actually told him tonight he needs a doctors appointment he stated but I am fine I told him no you’re not and I am not ok with it . He agreed so I told him I will make it for him


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## StarFires (Feb 27, 2018)

Lolati11 said:


> I love this making an appointment for him will work I actually told him tonight he needs a doctors appointment he stated but I am fine I told him no you’re not and I am not ok with it . He agreed so I told him I will make it for him


Heyyy good for you!

I don't know about this type of testing, so maybe some of the guys here will jump in to advise. What I'm thinking is it may need to be a fasting test, where he shouldn't have anything to eat or drink (other than water) before blood is drawn, so try to get a morning appointment.

Also, specifically tell them he's coming in to have his testosterone levels checked (along with the usual bloodwork) since you can't trust that he will bring it up with the doc.


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## moulinyx (May 30, 2019)

Lolati11 said:


> I love this making an appointment for him will work I actually told him tonight he needs a doctors appointment he stated but I am fine I told him no you’re not and I am not ok with it . He agreed so I told him I will make it for him


YAY! SO HAPPY FOR YOU!

I struggled for THREE YEARS to get my husband to go get his T levels checked. He actually had a pituitary injury from taking ADHD medication at too high of a dose for years, which resulted in a T level of 90 by 25. Our engagement and first year of marriage were nearly sexless. Getting on medication will make him feel so good again! 

I think the good ol' appointment setting trick is the best. Works every time


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## Divinely Favored (Apr 1, 2014)

If his Dr is not open to HRT go to a wellness clinic or a Urologist that will. My urologist prescribes mine and he himself has Low T. He needs his total testosterone level, his free testosterone level and estridial level also. If he has some belly fat it converts testosterone into estrogen and defeats the purpose. It can elevate his female hormone level which will fight against the testosterone.

Some people can not use topical testosterone treatments...do not absorb well. Barely raised my levels, had to take injection i give myself.

He needs to take vitamin D3 supliments also. I take 1 jelcap 2xday. Helps the testosterone.


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## moon7 (May 5, 2013)

He probably rather masterbate to porn?**

My case is **that and never got better. I remember his first birthday i wore a "nurse" sexy outfit (8years ago) and he only complained.


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