# I have no clue what to do?



## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

I need to talk to someone, I hope someone here can help. I have lurked here for a while and have read a lot of posts with similar issues as myself. But here goes anyway...

I have been married 6 years, was with my wife 3 before marriage. I have a 3 year old son, and one on the way in November. The issues I have are we never have sex or even touch for that matter. We have had discussions about this probably 5 times over our marriage, most recently about a month ago. I laid it all out to her what I wanted, how it's effecting our marriage and how I could not go on with marriage like this forever, divorce is inevitable. I think she realized there is a problem. I told her I think she lacks respect for me as I feel like that is the main reason. She said she really doesn't have a reason why she never wants to have sex. She does make most of the decisions in the house as far as bills, baby issues, house items, food etc. She works hard is not lazy, is very good with money etc. We recently moved out of state and she was able to quit her job of 12 years and we bought a new house and she is now a stay at home mom. I thought maybe that would make her less tired, and respect me more. No help.
I have read both NMMNG and MMSL. I see some good parts in there but I don't really know If I am a nice guy. I mean I work, I take of my son, I never go out with friends, I go shopping with her, do the outside work etc, lawn.... But I don't do much as far as laundry, vacuuming, cleaning the house etc. I can sometimes be very sarcastic, as we are with each other sometimes I may say the wrong thing to her. She is very very Independence and has a strong personality. She is and never was the jealous type at all, that's why I married her. She trusts me and I trust her. It's just that the whole sex thing before she was pregnant we probably had sex once every 4 months and that's probably just to shut me up. When we were just dating obviously we had sex more often, but it just kept slowing more and more as time went on. I just don't know if I am a nice guy like those books say, I don't bow down to her and do EVERYTHING she wants. I have no problem telling her no. She definitely runs the show, but it's not like I can't do what I want if I wanted. I'm kinda rambling here, I guess I just feel confused. I also know she reads romantic novels, which are basically sex books and I told her whats up you'll read this but wont touch me? She said "There just good books, tons of people read these now, you're getting carried away" I know I should probably get in better shape, lose weight etc. I am not a fat disgusting, unkempt beast or anything. I take care of myself but I could probably lose some weight and be in better shape. Anyone have any clue what I should do? Thanks guys...


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## mineforever (Jan 31, 2013)

How much does she read those romance novels and are they erotic novels or just romance have you read one?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

They are erotic. I have skimmed some and read the sex scenes. They are those popular erotic novels like 50 shades and ones like those. I am not sure how often she reads them probably days a week at least. But the no sex has been going on for years and years. It slowed a bit once we got engaged and now after 6 years it would be like never if I did not get pissed every 4 months.


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## mineforever (Jan 31, 2013)

Intamacy for women starts with the mind...men it starts with the physical (visual). Erotic books are women's version of porn....and it can be just as addictive. She has the perfect lover...he can says all the right things and does all the right things and he can be there any time she wants him. Get the picture. Do you know if she is mastetbating? If she is reading those erotic novels a lot and not having sex with you my guess is she is pleasuring herself.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

WTFHappened said:


> I need to talk to someone, I hope someone here can help. I have lurked here for a while and have read a lot of posts with similar issues as myself. But here goes anyway...
> 
> I have been married 6 years, was with my wife 3 before marriage. I have a 3 year old son, and one on the way in November. The issues I have are we never have sex or even touch for that matter. We have had discussions about this probably 5 times over our marriage, most recently about a month ago. I laid it all out to her what I wanted, how it's effecting our marriage and how I could not go on with marriage like this forever, divorce is inevitable. I think she realized there is a problem. I told her I think she lacks respect for me as I feel like that is the main reason. She said she really doesn't have a reason why she never wants to have sex. She does make most of the decisions in the house as far as bills, baby issues, house items, food etc. She works hard is not lazy, is very good with money etc. We recently moved out of state and she was able to quit her job of 12 years and we bought a new house and she is now a stay at home mom. I thought maybe that would make her less tired, and respect me more. No help.
> I have read both NMMNG and MMSL. I see some good parts in there but I don't really know If I am a nice guy. I mean I work, I take of my son, I never go out with friends, I go shopping with her, do the outside work etc, lawn.... But I don't do much as far as laundry, vacuuming, cleaning the house etc. I can sometimes be very sarcastic, as we are with each other sometimes I may say the wrong thing to her. She is very very Independence and has a strong personality. She is and never was the jealous type at all, that's why I married her. She trusts me and I trust her. It's just that the whole sex thing before she was pregnant we probably had sex once every 4 months and that's probably just to shut me up. When we were just dating obviously we had sex more often, but it just kept slowing more and more as time went on. I just don't know if I am a nice guy like those books say, I don't bow down to her and do EVERYTHING she wants. I have no problem telling her no. She definitely runs the show, but it's not like I can't do what I want if I wanted. I'm kinda rambling here, I guess I just feel confused. I also know she reads romantic novels, which are basically sex books and I told her whats up you'll read this but wont touch me? She said "There just good books, tons of people read these now, you're getting carried away" I know I should probably get in better shape, lose weight etc. I am not a fat disgusting, unkempt beast or anything. I take care of myself but I could probably lose some weight and be in better shape. Anyone have any clue what I should do? Thanks guys...


Work on what you can control. Get the weight back to a very good physical appearance.

All the other assumptions, I'm not sure you should be focused on that. While you do your physical journey, put all your concentration and energy into it and not worry about the relationship for a while.

Does that make sense? You don't always have to try to adjust it or wonder, sometimes do your own thing.


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## torani (May 6, 2013)

WTFHappened said:


> I have a 3 year old son, and one on the way in November. The issues I have are we never have sex or even touch for that matter.
> 
> *Ok, I just had my sweet little girl 3 weeks ago. This pregnancy for me was unlike my last. I had no sexual desires this time... I had no interest in sex and as hard as I tried to get turned on, I couldn't. Even I was baffled by my lack of interest in sex...
> 
> ...


Best wishes to you!


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## weightlifter (Dec 14, 2012)

Seems unlikely but ill put this out.

How many of the following?
Always texting and wont let you see
Always on fb and wont let you see
Phone password protected and guards it
Emailing secretly
Girls nights out late past midnight
There is some guy she talks to who is " just a friend"
How much of her time is unaccounted for?

If none... Just odd.


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## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

It hasn't nothing to do with her pregnancy, sex has been few and far between for 7 years... I don't think she's masturbating to books, it's possible but she hasn't read These books for 7 years so I don't know.

As far as that list, none of them are a yes. I can see her cell, email, whatever I want she doesn't do friends nights unless its dinner for an hour once every 6 months and last time I dropped her off.

I don't know I guess I'll just lose eight get in have and just see what happens? It's just so aggravating never having sex. It makes me resent her... I dunno..


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## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

Then why is she reading all those erotic novels if she has never really been interested in sex?
Does she prefer her solo sessions over sex with you?


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

WTFHappened said:


> I need to talk to someone, I hope someone here can help. I have lurked here for a while and have read a lot of posts with similar issues as myself. But here goes anyway...
> 
> I have been married 6 years, was with my wife 3 before marriage. I have a 3 year old son, and one on the way in November. The issues I have are we never have sex or even touch for that matter. We have had discussions about this probably 5 times over our marriage, most recently about a month ago. I laid it all out to her what I wanted, how it's effecting our marriage and how I could not go on with marriage like this forever, divorce is inevitable. I think she realized there is a problem. I told her I think she lacks respect for me as I feel like that is the main reason. She said she really doesn't have a reason why she never wants to have sex. She does make most of the decisions in the house as far as bills, baby issues, house items, food etc. She works hard is not lazy, is very good with money etc. We recently moved out of state and she was able to quit her job of 12 years and we bought a new house and she is now a stay at home mom. I thought maybe that would make her less tired, and respect me more. No help.
> I have read both NMMNG and MMSL. I see some good parts in there but I don't really know If I am a nice guy. I mean I work, I take of my son, I never go out with friends, I go shopping with her, do the outside work etc, lawn.... But I don't do much as far as laundry, vacuuming, cleaning the house etc. I can sometimes be very sarcastic, as we are with each other sometimes I may say the wrong thing to her. She is very very Independence and has a strong personality. She is and never was the jealous type at all, that's why I married her. She trusts me and I trust her. It's just that the whole sex thing before she was pregnant we probably had sex once every 4 months and that's probably just to shut me up. When we were just dating obviously we had sex more often, but it just kept slowing more and more as time went on. I just don't know if I am a nice guy like those books say, I don't bow down to her and do EVERYTHING she wants. I have no problem telling her no. She definitely runs the show, but it's not like I can't do what I want if I wanted. I'm kinda rambling here, I guess I just feel confused. I also know she reads romantic novels, which are basically sex books and I told her whats up you'll read this but wont touch me? She said "There just good books, tons of people read these now, you're getting carried away" I know I should probably get in better shape, lose weight etc. I am not a fat disgusting, unkempt beast or anything. I take care of myself but I could probably lose some weight and be in better shape. Anyone have any clue what I should do? Thanks guys...


You gave up all control. Looking through life, those guys usually don't get any sex or positive affirmations. I never wanted to be one of those guys.


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## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

Yea, now what?


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## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

She says she just reads them, everyone likes them... Like its some fad or something... She's like "You're over reacting get a grip..."


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

WTFHappened said:


> Yea, now what?


LOL. Maybe look at the map and accept where you are. Figure out where you need to be.

Like they say, it's much easier to get it with someone else. You get the position up front without having to struggle for it.

How long have you been in this position and when last do you remember being in a descent position with respect to her?


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## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

I guess I just am very humble and modest, I have a lot to be proud of in my life, I have a high paying job, a brand new house but I am the type of person to never gloat or talk myself up or even sometimes I kid around and poke jokes at myself, sometimes I think over the last 8 years I feel like she respects me less, maybe she doesn't feel like she could ever lose me. Sometimes I think if I worked out and got in great shape she may feel worried I may find someone better?


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

WTFHappened said:


> I guess I just am very humble and modest, I have a lot to be proud of in my life, I have a high paying job, a brand new house but I am the type of person to never gloat or talk myself up or even sometimes I kid around and poke jokes at myself, sometimes I think over the last 8 years I feel like she respects me less, maybe she doesn't feel like she could ever lose me. Sometimes I think if I worked out and got in great shape she may feel worried I may find someone better?


Your a successful and accomplished humble guy. You don't need "credit", she has Alpha'd up and lives in some of a normal "masculine" position in your household.

You probably should do something so that you are more viable to the free market, and it will make you feel better about yourself as well.

The thing that makes it real simple to understand is this. In the several dozen households that you are familiar with over the years, the couples who are in your alignment that you share with your wife currently, are those guys getting alot of sex or not?

Also those "self depraving" jokes, which you do to show how comfortable you are with yourself... The Alpha's use those to "laugh" at you about.

Their "laughs", while you are secure in yourself do not feel like they "hurt" you, but they feed their ego with it, and the more they "laugh", the worse you look in their eyes.

Look at the picture how she looks at it. Is there any guys out there she thinks is hot, that you think she would lay down for and be submissive to?

Think about it.


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## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

WTFHappened said:


> She says she just reads them, everyone likes them... Like its some fad or something... She's like "You're over reacting get a grip..."


Well the question I'm asking is that if she does like reading about sex, then how come she doesn't like sex?
Sorry it does not add up.
She does not like sex _with you_.
She may have somehow , somewhere along the line lost respect and then sexual attraction for you.
You need to find out why.
I she says that she doesn't know why, then suggest sex therapy, or maybe counselling.
In a marriage partnership, both partners are supposed to have free access to each other's body for sexual pleasure and mutual fulfilment.

If she doesn't want to go and get the problem fixed, then the ball is now back in your court and you would have to decide what's your next move.


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## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

Thank trey, that makes sense... I do notice other relationships that the girl does what the man says not just sex related, id say she wears the pants, but I'm not overly a mister nice guy. I just think my gut is that she doesn't respect me, doesn't think she'll ever lose me, doesn't care if I'm unhappy we don't have sex cause ill always we around.


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## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

When we had the talk a month ago she said she will do more to want to have sex, but I have to do more around the house, do the garbages without being told ever, put dishes away without being told if I see them, clean more... She did mention "being more of a man"


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

WTFHappened said:


> Thank trey, that makes sense... I do notice other relationships that the girl does what the man says not just sex related, id say she wears the pants, but I'm not overly a mister nice guy. I just think my gut is that she doesn't respect me, doesn't think she'll ever lose me, doesn't care if I'm unhappy we don't have sex cause ill always we around.


I think a basic building block is working on respect with her, and anyone else who is abusing or taking advantage of your current boundary situation.

Also getting in the gym with a vengeance like Machiavelli would preach, he says have a good body.

How is respect built?

And once again - we accept men in these positions usually are not having sex. I realize some of these men were very sexual and desired, and out of love and trust to their wife, they deferred the pants over time, usually in a secure fashion.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

WTFHappened said:


> When we had the talk a month ago she said she will do more to want to have sex, but I have to do more around the house, do the garbages without being told ever, put dishes away without being told if I see them, clean more... She did mention "being more of a man"


You can't do everything she think she wants. Think in terms of it of what patterns in male to female relationships produce a successful household, but also a successful sex life?

What married dudes are NOT having the sex, what does that household look like?


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## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

I just feel like a messed this up, years of doing the wrong ****, now it's too far gone to fix...


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

WTFHappened said:


> I just feel like a messed this up, years of doing the wrong ****, now it's too far gone to fix...


It's fixable... The methods may be time consuming, and some of the methods may not be nice or pretty!

However, solace yourself in that, outside of the current group you are in, that you can have an excellent starting point with someone new.

I think you do some of the chores the wife wants you to do, but balance it. Also don't do it all at once, and don't do it like a servant or she's the boss.

Assess the situation, figure out what you can do, and have something positive you can persue.


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## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

WTFHappened said:


> When we had the talk a month ago she said she will do more to want to have sex, but I have to do more around the house, do the garbages without being told ever, put dishes away without being told if I see them, clean more... She did mention "being more of a man"


I hope you are not falling into that trap of having to
" do chores for sex."
It doesn't work that way.
Sexual relations with a spouse is not dependent on doing housework or yard chores.
I think she's using that as an excuse.
You need to get the truth from her, do not beg or nag her for sex.
But you need to stand your ground that she come clean about her lack of sexual desire for you, and why she does not want to fix it.


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## weightlifter (Dec 14, 2012)

WTF. GLAD TO HEAR IT!!! yes really. Sorry hadda ask.


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## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

This is so difficult to figure out, sometimes I think maybe I need to help her more and show her more compliments etc... Then other times I feel like I'm a sucker and I'm being a ***** doing everything I can to make her wanna have sex...


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

I'm glad you accept where you are at. Keep your head lifted, piece together your current reality.


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## Deejo (May 20, 2008)

Sounds like you are in a parent/child relationship. 

It is difficult for a woman to respect, let alone be sexually attracted to a man whom she feels, rightly or wrongly, that she needs to mother.

Start in the shallow end.

Take your 3 year old to do stuff ... without her. Don't even invite her. Make note of how she responds.

Make plans, for you ... just you. Let her make plans for just her, and you cover the bases while she has her time. Make plans for just the two of you. 

Learn to lead. Be aware that she isn't going to just hand you the reins to decisions she used to make.

And again ... pay attention not so much to what she says, but what she does.

The paying attention part is invariably going to be pivotal in recognizing whether you can recover, or if you need to look for a new partner.


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## Deejo (May 20, 2008)

WTFHappened said:


> I just feel like a messed this up, years of doing the wrong ****, now it's too far gone to fix...


That's a good place to be. Change it up. You have nothing to lose and lot's to gain, whether it is with this woman or not.

I realize that your wife is pregnant. I also realize that her being pregnant has NOTHING to do with what's going on. I'd wager that this dynamic was well entrenched before you slid one past the goalie.


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## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

Deejo, I think you nailed it. This sums up our relationship. I really need to follow your advice... Any other pointers? Thanks


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

WTFHappened said:


> Deejo, I think you nailed it. This sums up our relationship. I really need to follow your advice... Any other pointers? Thanks


Man,

You can change your dynamic. But you have to look at it over the long term. There are things that you can change over the short term, and it has to be done.

Someone made an example.

Say your an ATM.

They appear, punch a few buttons and you spit out cash.

So you realize this is what's happening. You stop spitting out cash. They hit the machine, turn it upside down, try to take a pry bar to it, stop spitting out cash.

They'll stop trying that, but there has to be negative feedback and consistent negative feedback for it to occur.


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## Deejo (May 20, 2008)

Start slow. Don't be a d!ck. Keep loving your wife ... but love yourself more.

Seriously. I don't want you to think for a moment that I'm encouraging you to ditch your wife who is 3 or 4 months pregnant.

But ... you are correct. If things remain as they are, you will divorce regardless.

Make the effort to be a better man, rebuild your self-esteem and salvage your marriage. Sex is the dividend, not the payoff.

Know EXACTLY what it is you are going to do if things don't improve ... and do it. Don't threaten it. The DOING is what earns respect. Even when somebody doesn't like it, follow through is key


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## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

I guess I'll just help her a bit more around the house, diet, excersize, take my son out to the park alone etc.. I just feel like "why should I do something like take my son out and make her life easier, she never has sex with me screw her" I feel like I've tried to do more in the past but it never matters, this had been going on for yours and nothing has worked. I feel as if I've tried the do more, be sweeter, be more of a ****, be romantic... I just feel like nothing will ever work...


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## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

I meant years, sorry I'm on my cell.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

WTFHappened said:


> I guess I'll just help her a bit more around the house, diet, excersize, take my son out to the park alone etc.. I just feel like "why should I do something like take my son out and make her life easier, she never has sex with me screw her" I feel like I've tried to do more in the past but it never matters, this had been going on for yours and nothing has worked. I feel as if I've tried the do more, be sweeter, be more of a ****, be romantic... I just feel like nothing will ever work...


Deejo is going to give great advice.

Doing "more" is not going to help you, being nicer, helping more, etc is not going to be a magical combiation which makes the panties come off.

Part of it is basic physical and mental attraction whether it was your wife or someone else.

And you nailed the respect bridge.

If you where two equal level managers in the same space, how would you behave?


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## seeking sanity (Oct 20, 2009)

Your life seems to revolve around a) your wife, b) your work, c) not getting laid. What else is there going on? Do you have friends, hobbies, interests? 

If not, get some. 

Whether this thing works or not, you'd be better off getting a life. Getting a life could mean spending time with your kid because it's fun. Hitting the golf course. Hitting the gym. Going for beers with some buddies. 

Getting a life means less focus on how you aren't having sex, and your wife isn't into you. It also means emotionally divesting from her. 

It's a bit counter-intuitive, but I'm come to believe that relationships work best when the women is more invested in the man, then the man is in the women. It kind of sucks, but blame nature.


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## Deejo (May 20, 2008)

WTFHappened said:


> I guess I'll just help her a bit more around the house, diet, excersize, take my son out to the park alone etc.. I just feel like "why should I do something like take my son out and make her life easier, she never has sex with me screw her" I feel like I've tried to do more in the past but it never matters, this had been going on for yours and nothing has worked. I feel as if I've tried the do more, be sweeter, be more of a ****, be romantic... I just feel like nothing will ever work...


I would encourage you to do things YOU want to do. You aren't to tie her approval or disapproval to whether or not you think you should do them. Pleasing her isn't the reason ... for any of it. You making choices for yourself and your family and plotting your own course, is.

Getting a gym membership or starting to use the one you already have would be another suggestion.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

seeking sanity said:


> Your life seems to revolve around a) your wife, b) your work, c) not getting laid. What else is there going on? Do you have friends, hobbies, interests?
> 
> If not, get some.
> 
> ...





seeking sanity said:


> It's a bit counter-intuitive, but I'm come to believe that relationships work best when the women is more invested in the man, then the man is in the women. It kind of sucks, but blame nature.


It does seem that it's this way.


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## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

I need to do more outside of family and worrying about never getting sex... I am joining a gym this week. I think that will be the best simplest first step for me. I mean I'm 5'11" 189lbs, I'm not some huge whale but I am overweight and loose.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

WTFHappened said:


> I need to do more outside of family and worrying about never getting sex... I am joining a gym this week. I think that will be the best simplest first step for me. I mean I'm 5'11" 189lbs, I'm not some huge whale but I am overweight and loose.


5'11" and 185LB's is a great size to be at.

Lose some fat, gain some muscle. Give yourself six months or so, put the habits into effect for life.


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## mineforever (Jan 31, 2013)

WTFHappened...if she is reading erotic romance novels she is interested in sex! You don't read those books if your not interested in sex. Does she read a particular publisher? Romance novels are an escape mechanism for some people ....when you don't have the life/ relationship you want you can have it in on your imagination in a book. Problem is books aren't real and people can't complete with imaginary characters in a book...your husband isn't going to be 007...a buff cowboy...a millionaire with a sports car...and a bad boy on a Harley all at the same time. Its a trap many young women get themselves into living in a fantacy instead of the real world.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

Yea it really bothers me that she obviously must think about sex and get in the mood if she's reading books like that. So I guess it's just me she doesn't feel interested in. That hurts. I thought maybe she was just never interested in sex....


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## mineforever (Jan 31, 2013)

I wouldn't say that now. You may be that cowboy...and that millionaire.....and that harley rider in her fantacys. Problem is if she really is living her sexuallity through fantacy and her own pleasuring of herself this is a hard habit to break. It is no easier to break than a man's addiction to porn. I find it very interesting that men don't realize how many women use these erotic novels the same way men use porn. Just like with porn...erotic novels give women unrealistic views of what real relationships and sex should be like.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

I'm totally confused and overwhelmed, I appreciate everyone's thoughts and help, I can't say in totally sure what to so first, but I kinda have an idea. Ill probably hit the gym get in shape and do more things on my own and with my son... Well see what happens?


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## Kaboom (Feb 6, 2013)

Those 50-shades books are especially raunchy and touch base on a lot of domination. Sounds like she maybe secretly wants to be dominated and is waiting for you to take the hint? Maybe. I dunno. What I do know is that many people are polar opposites in the bedroom compared to what they are in life. You ever try tying her up, blindfolding her, taking it up a notch?


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## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

No, she won't even let me touch we without getting pissed... I doubt she wants that...


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## mineforever (Jan 31, 2013)

WTFHappened....do you know of any thing happend in your wifes past that might have made her hesitant or skittish concerning sex? I can understand your confusion because she her behavior is in contridiction. On one han she is pushing you away and says she has no interest in sex and on the otherchand she is reading erotic novels....which says she has a sex drive for sure. For whatever my two scents is worth...I think she is hiding her sexual desire for some reason...I dought it is lack of desire for you....my guess is there is something else in play...fear...shyness...nice girls don't syndrom....abuse from past...sexual insecurities....ect. She is reading those books because its something she wants....she wouldn't be reading about something she is not interested in. I would recommend a real heart to heart talk with MC to get to the bottem of what is really bugging her.

Or you could do what my husband did when I started reading too many of them....he got in bed with me and curled up behind me popped out my book and proceeded to read the steamest Dom/Subs spanking scene he could find and then asked me if I wanted to try it since like I had said "it was what everyone was reading and was no big deal".....he is such a smart a**...but I got the point.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

So why were you reading them? She reads them on a kindle... I don't know if she's insecure, I don't think so...


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## mineforever (Jan 31, 2013)

Oh....no fair asking me questions ;-)....well because it allowed me to fantacize about things I wanted to do or thought I might like to do. Big guy and I usually try out a lot of what I have learned over the years in those books. We have spent the last 10 yrs trying making up for the first 20 yrs we waisted. But lets go back to the first 20 yrs of my marriage when it was basically sexless and I read those books as a way to escape from the marriage that wasn't right and I didn't know how to fix. I have always had a HD but you would have said I was LD by the definitions on this forum...our relationship had issues that drove my behavior back then. I don't know if your wife is using the books as an escape or not ....but I can tell you my big guy had no clue at all back then.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

Thanks for everyones help... Ill let you know how it goes.


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## MrK (Sep 2, 2010)

She doesn't love you.


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## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

MrK said:


> She doesn't love you.


Thanks for the informative post.... Nice guy.


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## Suspecting (Jan 8, 2013)

The last time you had sex she got pregnant?


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## WTFHappened (May 11, 2013)

Nah, it would of been but we had a long talk and we did once after that probably cause she fealt bad... But it's back to normal...


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