# Is there a way to get free?



## mildlyperplexed (Feb 3, 2013)

I had a phone call from my Mum a couple of days ago its its still bothering me. Its nearly 6am here and I cant get back to sleep after a bad dream triggered by this phone call. I spoke about the conversation with my husband right afterwards and we laughed about it together but somehow its still gotten under my skin.

I wish there was a way to either stop her contacting me or to make it stop hurting every time she does.

Vent over I guess, is anyone awake?


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## Wendy1 (Feb 20, 2013)

mildlyperplexed said:


> I had a phone call from my Mum a couple of days ago its its still bothering me. Its nearly 6am here and I cant get back to sleep after a bad dream triggered by this phone call. I spoke about the conversation with my husband right afterwards and we laughed about it together but somehow its still gotten under my skin.
> 
> I wish there was a way to either stop her contacting me or to make it stop hurting every time she does.
> 
> Vent over I guess, is anyone awake?


Do you talk to your mother about this? if not i think she should know that she is hurting you what ever she is doing to you or saying to you. if do not tell her she will keep do it.


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## Wiltshireman (Jan 23, 2013)

Extended families can be hard work. There always seems to be at least one person who has to spread discord or say hurtful things.

My wife had a volatile relationship with her mother throughout her childhood (she spent lots of time at her grandmothers as both parents worked) and this continued after we married. Once caller ID became widely available we did use that to screen our calls and I would try to pick up calls from the MIL as she would often say things just to get a reaction. Thankfully for us things have got better and my wife tells me that her relationship with her mother is better now than it has ever been. Mainly because the MIL has finally accepted that with wife is no longer a child who she can tell what to do.

I hope things get better for you.


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## mildlyperplexed (Feb 3, 2013)

I think my husband would rather I throw him into the path of a stampeding hippo. Mum is actually on best behavior right now its things she has said and done in the past that color everything she says and does now. I'm struggling to shake off old feelings and I'm not ready to talk to her about anything important to me so I feel the constant need to filter everything I say to her which is really stressful. She dropped it into the conversation that the only reason she was talking to me was because she couldn't get hold of my brother (avoiding her) and my sister is abroad. Shes been assuming that I was just a horrible ungrateful person for cutting her off so much but now my siblings are doing the same thing. Maybe I need to ask them to take more of the burden. 

Now that its not 6am and everything generally looks brighter


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