# I moved out



## healingme (Aug 21, 2010)

I moved out last weekend into a one bedroom apartment. The move was intensely emotional, and I cried most of the time. Now, almost a week later, I've gone numb. My friend at work tells me I seem happier. It's probably because I'm living in my favourite part of Melbourne again, having lived out in my least favourite part for the last 4 years. In a way, I feel refreshed to be back "home", and living peacefully with my two cats. To be honest, I don't miss my husband. What I mean is, I miss the man I married, but I don't miss the presence of who he is now. I realise I haven't sighed or rolled my eyes in almost a week. My pulse has been steady. My anxiety levels have dropped. Just not having to look at him, hear his tone and sense his vibe has made my life easier already. I don't feel so desperate to get to sleep. I don't mind waking up a little earlier to get to work. The traffic on the way home doesn't bother me. I wouldn't say I'm happier, but I am just a bit more relaxed. 

There is still much to do in selling the house. It's already advertised and there is an inspection in two days time. I've still got some belongings that I need to pick up from the house as well. I am reluctant to do that, even though I do need them, because I just don't want to go back there. I don't want to see him, talk to him, get into the whole thing again. 

But, for now, things are ok. The plumbing in the apartment sucks. The hot water system needs replacing and I doubt the landlord will want to do that. It has been leaking for obviously quite some time and has rotted out the kitchen cabinet. I hate the bathroom and kitchen. But I'm not stressed about it. Not having the influence of my unhealthy marriage in my life has made it easier to cope with just the general day to day things I would have normally found quite stressful. It's like I've taken a chill pill in a way. Having said that, just below that cool surface is a rolling ocean of molten anger that has vented in short spurts at work in the last few days, so I'm very careful to stay focused! 

We all have to take these huge changes in our lives on a day-to-day basis, one step at a time. I've made the biggest step by moving out, and now I will let my stride relax a little and have a dawdle through life for a while.


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## old timer (Nov 23, 2012)

Well, it's been two years...how's everything going now?


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