# Divorce is final today.



## helolover (Aug 24, 2012)

2 years almost to the day when I caught her stepping out on me.

In my case, the divorce was uglier than I would have liked, but compared to some other peoples' experience, not so bad. 

I retained joint legal and physical custody of my kid, and that was the main thing I was hoping for. Everything else was stuff and money. Things you can't take with you when you go. 

There is a tomorrow, folks. When we're mired down into the weeds of deciding to reconcile or divorce, it's very hard to move forward. If you decide to divorce, it's one day at a time. I'm not sure about the reconciliation side of the house. At first I wanted to go that direction. I then realized the person I was married to was incapable of being in a marriage with me and helping me meet my needs. I decided not to waste another day of my life pursuing it. 

I'll check back from time to time. I like this board.


----------



## Why Not Be Happy? (Apr 16, 2010)

Solid post! You sound like you are in a good place.


----------



## movealong (Aug 9, 2013)

Good on ya, helover.


----------



## Pamvhv (Apr 27, 2014)

I hope I can get to where you are. Good luck.


----------



## honcho (Oct 5, 2013)

Is there really an end? Having been cheated out of it so many times now I doubted anyone every got to a final. Must almost be a sense of relieve to finally have it done after 2 years.


----------



## Fenix (Jul 2, 2013)

Congratulations, helolover!! You have your freedom to make your path. Well done!


----------



## Pictureless (May 21, 2013)

Helo,

I'd say congratulations but that's not the word I'm looking for. Divorce sucks and I hate it; even when it's amicable and for a "good" reason. Celebrating divorce masks the end of a marriage. 

Helo, I wish for you happiness and a joyful life. If you want it, I hope you find the right one someday to love and share your life with. Until then make for yourself as good a life as possible.


----------



## BeachGuy (Jul 6, 2011)

Congrats. I hope I can get there one day. Been 15 months since I filed.


----------



## GotLifeBack (Sep 12, 2013)

Congrats helo!

Sounds like you've made the right choice for yourself, which is what matters.

If you want to stay in touch, inbox me and I'll give you my facebook


----------



## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Welcome to the other side.


----------



## AFPhoenix (Dec 24, 2013)

Congrats Helo! 

Leave some bread crumbs on the trail so I and others can follow!


----------



## Bluebirdie (Apr 26, 2014)

Glad your day is over and you are now focusing on your new life for real. It it awful being still here... he is suppose to do the necessary things as getting assets to his/my name etc... but I dont see signs. Perhaps one day it will come all together and this will get final, but I am leaving in 1.5 months for 2.5 months, so that gives 4 months still to sign and deliver to the judge, wait for the hearing... so what was supposed to be endin in June could end until the Nov/Dec. 

If it is coming, let it come!


----------



## Fenix (Jul 2, 2013)

I do think congratulations are in order! Celebrate getting to the other side, being successful in your desire to rebuild a solid life and keeping your sanity and good will intact. All reasons for celebration! *Sometimes, the death of a marriage should be celebrated.*

I certainly am going to celebrate mine!


----------



## Shoto1984 (Apr 11, 2009)

It is a strange thing to congratulate someone on. I like the idea of "welcome to the rest of your life" "may it be happy and fulfilling". My D day is tomorrow after over a year of hell. I'll post some thoughts if I'm not too numb.


----------



## helolover (Aug 24, 2012)

Fenix said:


> ...*Sometimes, the death of a marriage should be celebrated.*...


it took a long time coming for me to understand that. I realized a long time back that I was going to be okay without being married or having that person in my life. Once over that hump (sometimes mountain) acceptance and moving forward becomes much easier. 

Thanks for the note.

HL


----------



## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*From the Broadway musical, Annie, always remember that "the sun will come out tomorrow!"

And like me and most everyone else here that has trekked down that same rugged highway, helolover, please be assured that you will come to feel those very same warm rays of truth, freedom, and independence, that that sun so warmly projects! 

Please consider yourself a survivor, Sir!*


----------



## helolover (Aug 24, 2012)

arbitrator said:


> Please consider yourself a survivor, Sir![/COLOR][/B]


I absolutely do, Arbitrator. Thanks for your note.


----------

