# This is pure pain



## lightningbug (Nov 29, 2012)

My wife and I have been married 13 years, separated in the same house for 5 weeks. W wil love together for another 4 weeks before I move for work. I am watching xmas movies with my boys (5&7) while she does on the couch reading erotica on her phone. We discussed new years tonight and she does not want to be together that night. I have been limiting conversions during this past 5 weeks, but tonight I have never felt more alone surrounded by family. I was doing well, but this is hard.
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## lightningbug (Nov 29, 2012)

Sorry, I'm on my phone. We will live together for 4 more weeks.
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## HappyKaty (Nov 20, 2012)

Sorry you're here.

Why are you guys separated?


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## GetTough (Jul 18, 2010)

Do you have to move? If she is leaving you, try to stay in the family home with the kids if at all possible.


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## lightningbug (Nov 29, 2012)

She is a teacher under contract. She and the boys will be moving to the same city I am moving to after the school year. She told me that we will be moving to separate addresses when we get there. We have agreed on 50/50 with the boys when we get there, but I will be coming back on weekends to be with the boys.
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## lightningbug (Nov 29, 2012)

3 years ago she had an EA with an old flame she met on fb. We went to MC, but she quit. We tried to move forward, but she gave me the "love you, but not in love with you." She has completely gone cold since she told me she wanted a divorce after thanksgiving day. I'm in IC and have been doing well until I went to my family xmas with boys for the weekend. She went out and stayed out all night at her cousin's house.
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## Orpheus (Jul 6, 2012)

you might want to get that in writing before you move out, lest it becomes a rude January awakening.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

I bet your chick is screwing around on you and that 3rd party influence has alot to do with breaking up this family. face it, she already has the capacity, what makes you think that its not going on still?
This is important cuz your approach in fighting for this family has evrything to do with making an affair as inconvienent and as uncomfortable as possibly by gathing evidence and exposeing it versuus giving her space. Often the space you give her strengthen the affair instead of allowing her to miss her family.

You have to find out what is influencing her choices so you can address them in the right manner. If there is deciet involved then bing the worlds greatest husband won't mean sh1t cuz you have been replaced and you can't cmpete with the new relationship, but only making it more difficult to continue by exposing and giving her a taste of reality by cutting her off.

If in fact I am wrong and there is no one else and she is infact reading romance novels instead of making romance novels then you can redirect your fight in saving this marriage.

You need to know your enemy here and get the fact your self by going undercover and investigating your wifes agenda.

What ever is infecting this marriage you have to get rid of it so the both you save this for the boys.

When I was going thru this crap I bugged my old ladies car with a VAR (voice activated recorder) and velcrowed it under her car seat. The information saved my marriage once I realized how fogged in my wife was with this POS guy that was using her for sex.


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