# What happens a divorce final hearing??



## blueskies30 (Jan 27, 2010)

My HUsband and I are currently working on our marraige and I feel we have gone pretty far in the communication and reconnecting department, but there is still great room for improvement especially after recent exposure of his affair.

he has kept the divorce going, but it was on hold to allow us time. Now with his exposure I guess he wants to keep it there just in case.

My question is can a hearing be canceled if he decides we really don't need it??

The hearing could be in Feb or April, but its not scheduled yet.

So what happens at a Divorce final hearing?? Can I say I don't want the divorce?? Can he say he just can't have the heart to divorce me??


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

A divorce can be stopped at any time and withdrawn.

Do you have an attorney for yourself?


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## blueskies30 (Jan 27, 2010)

NO I don't have a lawyer for myself. No one wants to represent when you have no money. IN the begining I had a paralegal just to help fill out paperwork, but it was just only that. Not something where they really cared about you and were there when you needed them.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

blueskies30 said:


> NO I don't have a lawyer for myself. No one wants to represent when you have no money. IN the begining I had a paralegal just to help fill out paperwork, but it was just only that. Not something where they really cared about you and were there when you needed them.


If you talk to enough attornies you will find one who will agree to ask to court for your husband to pay for your legal fees. This is done all the time.


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## blueskies30 (Jan 27, 2010)

Maybe I should do this, It will make him just have a higher bill


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

The last meeting is the ceremonial burning of the effigy followed by mutual spitting in each other's face. The man gives a bag of gold and the woman returns his nuts.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

By the way Blueskies.. when I got my divorce there was no final hearing. We worked it out through our attornies. Signed the papers, filed them with the court and we were divorced.

The only reason we went to court at all was when my ex tried to get 100% custody of our son. It did not work.


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## blueskies30 (Jan 27, 2010)

UPDATE:

At our last MC session I brought up that he still had the divorce going even though he seemed to want to work out the marriage. I was able to say that I felt insecure with a divorce hanging over my head. Our MC session was really good even though he was not sure about going 2 days before xmas. He was afraid of ruining the good time we had been having together. I think the counseling session actually made things even better. Our counselor noticed as soon as we walked in that we were happy together and much better than the last session 2-3 weeks before this one.

My husband has announced to me and his children that he is moving back in this next weekend. He told me yesterday that he is calling his attorney and stopping the divorce


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## This is me (May 4, 2011)

blueskies30 said:


> UPDATE:
> 
> At our last MC session I brought up that he still had the divorce going even though he seemed to want to work out the marriage. I was able to say that I felt insecure with a divorce hanging over my head. Our MC session was really good even though he was not sure about going 2 days before xmas. He was afraid of ruining the good time we had been having together. I think the counseling session actually made things even better. Our counselor noticed as soon as we walked in that we were happy together and much better than the last session 2-3 weeks before this one.
> 
> My husband has announced to me and his children that he is moving back in this next weekend. He told me yesterday that he is calling his attorney and stopping the divorce



That is great news!! Way to go. Love hearing positive outcomes.


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## blueskies30 (Jan 27, 2010)

I will really be able to breathe when I know for sure divorce has stopped. I know a lot of people were telling me he was playing me. Even my MIL thought things were weird, but promised me that she wouold not say a word to him about her anger. I just tried to trust my husband and kept bad feelings out while I was with him and let him feel the good the reason we got married. I have learned my husband is very very effected byt he way I feel. So if I feel sad he feels sad and hopeless, but if I feel happy, he feels happy and feels the love for me come through.

My husband is moving back in this weekend, so when he is moved back in I'm gonna feel so good. Gotta continue the good communication and having fun while dealing with family life


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## madaboutlove (Aug 28, 2011)

I am so happy for you, keep working hard, it is worth it


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## blueskies30 (Jan 27, 2010)

Yes I will be working hard on this marriage still when he is living with us again. Since We already have 11 years together, I know its still might be a long hard road to keep the positive going once he is home. I'm giving him his needs right now as far as my time, but I'm afriad of falling short once he is home. He likes dinner to be done or int he process of being done when he gets home from work, but then he also wants me to be abel to at least be in the bathroom with him when he takes his shower when he gets home. Sometimes he wants a quicky during his shower with our children down stairs.

I think once he moves in I need to continue to not worry about our children so much. I know they are old enough now to be playing for 5-10min while we are still in the house and within ear shot of them.

What my husband wanted in his wife was for her to relax a lot more and have way more fun.

So we are going on a cruise in March and I have agreed to do some excursions I would not normally do like Zipline and roller coaster. The ship has a Zip line and a Flow rider and I may possibly do those too. 

I wanted more sex in the marriage. my sex drive was and still is very high. Perhaps his is higher when he sees his wife having more fun with him. Our sex life was very satisfying before all the stress and worry. 3-5 times a week was normal. It was normal for me to be sore a lot.


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