# Does your girl ever come before you do?



## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

Guys, esp those in their 50's, I'm wondering how much foreplay you have with your wife, how long you keep an erection, and whether she ever has an orgasm before you do?

In our marriage, we got in the habit of him having an orgasm first, and then he will use his wonderful fingers on me (or I do myself), but by then he is already half asleep and it is not exciting for me. I get turned on very fast and have not needed any foreplay, so he never does more than a few seconds of foreplay on me (or none), but I am curious what it would be like and what I may be missing. My husband is in his early 50's, I'm a few years younger, and we are both in great health and physically active.


----------



## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

Can I give you my answer? I am not a man. I always come before my husband. I get on top of him, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, then I come. Then it's my husband's turn to come. After I come, the feeling is even more sensitive when he is inside of me working! 
I am in my late 30's.


----------



## Chris Taylor (Jul 22, 2010)

We have foreplay usually for 30-45 minutes. I maintain my erection the entire time.

My wife prefers that I have an orgasm first because she gets very sensitive once she does and it makes it hard for her to let me have intercourse after that. So we have foreplay, intercourse and then I get her off using oral, toys, hand, whatever.

I will admit that during that refractory stage I could easily fall asleep too but hang in there until my wife is satisfied.


----------



## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

Wow, greenpearl, good for you! It takes me at least 5 min, usually around 10 with direct stimulation, so I have never been able to come by wiggling on top of him. Are you having intercourse while you are wiggling?

Chris, do you ever feel too tired to just hang in there? I think a man must get resentful of having to spend the time, esp. those times when it can take really long (like 20 min or more). Also does foreplay include anything other than genital touching, and do you spend so much time because you like to, or because you know that your wife likes it? 

If the women are masturbating after their husband has an orgasm, does he watch, hold you, try to participate, or fall asleep? I'm just wondering what I should expect, as I am not really happy with this department.


----------



## Sadara (Jul 27, 2010)

Foreplay is involved with us, I need it to get in the mood. Some times he's first, some times I'm first. It just depends. But, I am lucky enough that my husband can keep it going if he comes first and I can do what greenpearl said, get on top and wiggle wiggle wiggle.


----------



## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

Sara Ann,

Every once in a while it takes my wife quite a while. I certainly don't get resentful! It's what I like doing most, so why would I be anxious for it to end? As long as she comes in time to prevent my fatal heart attack, I'm good with it. Even if she doesn't, what better way to leave this world?


----------



## HopeinHouston (Mar 1, 2010)

We are in our middle 30s here. I do sometimes have a problem keeping a really rigid erection but it almost never causes problem in sex, or if so only momentary. It is never a deal killer. 

As far as cumming though, my wife usually comes 2-3 times before I do. She sometimes (half teasingly) jokes that I take too long. I'm sure more women wish their men had stamina like that, but it is what it is.


----------



## greeneyeddolphin (May 31, 2010)

Well, I'm a woman and we're both in our early 30s (I'm 31, he'll be 33 in about a week and a half), but for us, I always come first, and usually multiple times. He's very unselfish and giving, and always makes sure I do first. I don't have to do anything for myself, he's always willing to do what it takes. We do lots of oral, lots of foreplay, lots of uh... "other" play, and alternate all of it with penetration.


----------



## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

Wow, greenpearl, good for you! It takes me at least 5 min, usually around 10 with direct stimulation, so I have never been able to come by wiggling on top of him. Are you having intercourse while you are wiggling?


Yes, his toy is in my body.    
I have a pretty young heart. With my husband, I am very natural. I am 100% true in front of him. I don't feel ashamed. I don't feel embarrassed. Just want to enjoy. My husband likes me this way. It is so easy for him to tell if I am satisfied or not.

You husband loves you. He will sure want you to be satisfied. Sometimes we masturbate in front of each other, watching each other, just for fun. My husband likes to watch me masturbate in front him. I like watching him masturbating in front of me, too. Seeing a big toy in front of me having fun, very interesting.


----------



## Atholk (Jul 25, 2009)

When the male orgasms it causes an Oxytocin release which makes him among other things... sleepy.

Ladies first.


----------



## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

How long do you wiggle? Whenever I take things slow on top, he seems to want to get moving again. So I should just tell him to let me wiggle? I'd like to try that. I wonder if he would lose his erection without thrusting though, esp. if I am just sitting there for a while wiggling.


----------



## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

Sara Ann said:


> How long do you wiggle? Whenever I take things slow on top, he seems to want to get moving again. So I should just tell him to let me wiggle? I'd like to try that. I wonder if he would lose his erection without thrusting though, esp. if I am just sitting there for a while wiggling.


If I am very horny, one minute. Sometimes five. If he becomes soft, I go up and down, or in and out, tease him, make him hard again. 
I think of horny pictures too. That helps me come.


----------



## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

Wow, that is fast. I think it would take me at least 5 minutes. I don't fantasize anymore. I focus on the sensations in my body.

A long time ago we had some simultaneous orgasms, as I masturbated during intercourse, but I don't like them, because I want his attention on me during my climax because that makes it more exciting for me, and likewise I want to be focused on him during his climax as that excites me, and when we do it at the same time we are each in our own world and not enjoying the other, so we miss out on half the fun.


----------



## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

Sara Ann said:


> Wow, that is fast. I think it would take me at least 5 minutes. I don't fantasize anymore. I focus on the sensations in my body.
> 
> A long time ago we had some simultaneous orgasms, as I masturbated during intercourse, but I don't like them, because I want his attention on me during my climax because that makes it more exciting for me, and likewise I want to be focused on him during his climax as that excites me, and when we do it at the same time we are each in our own world and not enjoying the other, so we miss out on half the fun.


Five minutes are common. Most of the times I need about five times. One minute is when I haven't had sex for quite a few days. I have never come together with my husband. I don't know if it is easy for a man to make his woman come. At least he has to work very hard. My husband can't make me come if I am not doing anything. I have to be very active. Sometimes I read porn stories and that can make me very horny. I can come very fast. My husband likes to eat me. During the same time, I read porn stories. I can have very strong orgasms this way. We don't do it too often, but it is really a great fun. The orgasms are much stronger. Because after I come, my husband continues licking me. The sensation is really great. I don't know if you husband likes to lick you. If he does, you can try that. I strongly recommend this.


----------



## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

He says he can only lick me when he is really turned on. He used to do it early in our marriage, but now he won't, because he says he must be really turned on. That makes me feel bad, ie he is not "really turned on" by me anymore. Although I am almost 50, I have a body that looks like J. Anniston or D. Moore, so I know I am hot, I am not taking it personal, but I wonder why he won't do it. Maybe it is still about the other issue we are dealing with, and he has to let down the wall between us, ie it is mental with him, maybe a control thing. He did tell me last week he would do, I should just quit asking him. So I am waiting, because I can't even remember what it feels like. I love going down on him all the time. And I have done it to a woman and liked that too, so I think every man should enjoy his wife's entire body. Just my 2 cents.


----------



## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

I think every man should enjoy his wife's entire body. 
I agree. 
We lick and suck them everywhere. They should be the same. 

Maybe he is still pouting. Do men like to pout? Let us ask men!!! I think they like to pout. they don't know that themselves. In Chinese culture, men have to look after women and spoil women. I told women that we have to look after them and spoil them, too. When they were young, they were really spoiled by their mothers. So I bet they still want to be spoiled. Just don't want to admit it. Ha ha ha...............
And they are stubborn too. For a stubborn kid, the only trick I know is lure. What does he like? Use it as a lure. Baby baby baby, look what mama has for you! Want it??? You have to make mama happy first........................

D.Moore ............sexy............. put on something sexy, I am sure your husband will crawl to you! My mind is creating a picture.......................

Me licking another woman, my husband's fantasy. When he is soft, I quickly tell him that two women are licking each other, and he insists I have to be one of them. Oh, holy, he gets hard so fast!!!!!
So far it is still his fantasy.


----------



## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

Last night he did lick me, and I was so wet, when he tried anal penetration with his finger, it went right in. Now I am ready to give him his fantasy. Stay tuned.


----------



## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

Waiting for more stories.


----------



## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

We are in our 40's, our 21 yr anniversary in a few days . I can probably count less than 10 times in our marraige my husband went BEFORE ME. It is very important to him -for me to get mine 1st. He always holds out - as long as possible. Because of this - 90% of the time we go together. As soon as mine comes, he lets loose. 

I remember reading about multiple orgasms for men, and I was surrpised to learn (from the description on the DVD) that my husband has been doing that for years. It is when the guy has those "spasms" inside you -where he is about to BURST- but stops & controls it - If he can do this again & again before he cums, he is a multiple orgasmic man. 

We didn't use to have much sex so he was ready to explode almost immediately in those younger days, he had to have me SO READY to go before I got on him or he got on me, usually lasted less than 2 minutes tops. I remember a few times I would get mad at him if he went first. (Oh that was bad!) But usualy he could get it back up soon enough -on those rare occasions -when he was younger. I *always* wanted my orgasm, and for some reason, I can not get off orally. Very very rare, maybe less than 5 times in my life. 

These days we have alot of sex so he is able to last alot longer , a little less of those "on the edge" spasms, but he still has them too- which I love, he is almost 47 yrs. He can last about 15 minutes if need be. Sometimes he uses a slither of Viagra to help him out if a late night or too many nights in a row. After a little forplay (we both do oral on each other most of the time) -I can go anywhere from 2 - 5 minutes generally. 

I'm always looking forward to my next "fix". I think I am addicted to orgasms.


----------



## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

It sounds like I need to tell him to try lasting longer, to use more control. Maybe he does not realize how much I love him being in me, and I'd love more than 2 min.

The other day when we did oral on me, it took quite a while for me to have an orgasm, even though it felt so good.. Unfortunately, when he was done, it had been too long and he lost his erection. After a few minutes it came back, but was not as strong as before, so we did not get to play as long as I wanted.


----------



## Scannerguard (Jan 26, 2010)

Sara Ann,

Thanks for that share. 

I read on WebMD that I think it's normal sexual response for a man to lose an erection 2-3x during a sexual encounter. I was wondering if I was abnormal.

Also. . .I love doing oral on my woman. . .I just love it and make sure I stop and say it while I am doing it. . .but. . .I have the exact same problem as your husband - the erection will come back, but not as strong as before.

It's like there is this "Erection Window" during sex. . .maybe it's like I was talking about in the other thread about testosterone. . .the "hunting" hormone. It's like, okay, I got her pants off, I have my "prey" there. . .I have to take it right now. . .RIGHT NOW. . .and when it's 30 minutes later after oral. . .it's like "Eh. . .your prey escaped." (lol) All the sexual thoughts that were dominating your head at beginning got dispersed.

This is why morning sex is so good for me - raging hard-on. . .freshly awoken from a dream. . .just get to work after a minute or two of foreplay and if she's in the mood and she can be on top, she can get off too.

Try switching sex to the morning and decreasing foreplay and changing to a less pleasurable position for him (for me, it's her on top. . .it's pleasing. . .but not "I'm going to pop my cork after 4 thrusts" pleasing).

Just a suggestion.


----------



## Crypsys (Apr 22, 2010)

Atholk said:


> When the male orgasms it causes an Oxytocin release which makes him among other things... sleepy.
> 
> Ladies first.


I wonder if i'm screwed up then Atholk. ;-) After I orgasm I don't get sleepy or sedate. I actually want to wiggle, move around and do things. I also get worked up, I almost feel like I do right after exercise. I generally have to go do something to calm down (watch tv, etc). Luckily though afterward my wife doesn't want to cuddle, so I'm free to go calm down.

As to orgasming, my wife always comes first, usually multiple times before I do. The few times I have come first it makes her enjoyment (penetration, fingers, toys, etc) less because of the semen inside of her feels weird and makes her all sticky, etc.

As to staying hard, it just depends on what were doing in foreplay. If I am giving her a full body massage, usually I won't stay hard. But if the foreplay is give and take, then I will stay hard.


----------



## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

This is why morning sex is so good for me - raging hard-on. . .freshly awoken from a dream. . .just get to work after a minute or two of foreplay and if she's in the mood and she can be on top, she can get off too.

Scannerguard

Interesting!!! I love to play with my husband's toy in the morning. It feels so big and hard!!! Just love to play with it. We don't have much morning sex though. He is too tired to play. He needs a long time to wake up, but I can get my way if I want to. My husband says it is the best way for him to wake up. I don't do it often because I want him to get more sleep. 
He doesn't have erection problems since I don't need him to stay hard for long. Sometimes he gets soft because I have distracted him by conversation. Then I just have to tell him that two women are licking each other. 
Does fantasy work on you? 
It works on me?
I want to ask everybody this question!


----------



## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

greenpearl said:


> Then I just have to tell him that two women are licking each other.
> Does fantasy work on you?
> It works on me?
> I want to ask everybody this question!




My husband, in his mid 40's goes soft, gets hard, goes soft during forplay. If we dont have sex for maybe 3 days or so, he seems to stay harder with less loosing it during forplay on me. And like everyone else says, mornings are the best. Love those days off. 

I have definetly used flirting talk, fantasy talk to get him to grow. This always seems to do the trick, to put him in rememberance of some earlier HOT time we had. Although he likes to be quiet in bed, I like to flirt a little and I can see the benefits to his erection when I do. But I must be careful, if I take the converstation to the paint on the ceiling, or he hears the dog bark, the phone ring, the kids at the door, all those distractions can create a deflating softy. 

But thankfully, what goes down will surely come back up !


----------



## jc32 (Jan 25, 2010)

SimplyAmorous said:


> I can probably count less than 10 times in our marraige my husband went BEFORE ME. It is very important to him -for me to get mine 1st. He always holds out - as long as possible. Because of this - 90% of the time we go together. As soon as mine comes, he lets loose.
> 
> .


*Exactly the same for my wife and I. I am lucky that she is VERY orgasmic. It usually takes less than two minutes to get her to climax, but it's still top priority for me that she comes at least once before I do. The only down side to this is that I would like to last much longer, but her orgasm usually sends me over the edge. I find that if I can hold out past her first one, I'm good for 5-10 more minutes, but if she starts having multiple orgasms I can't last longer than 2 or 3 minutes from start to finish. *


----------



## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

jc32 said:


> * The only down side to this is that I would like to last much longer, but her orgasm usually sends me over the edge. I find that if I can hold out past her first one, I'm good for 5-10 more minutes, but if she starts having multiple orgasms I can't last longer than 2 or 3 minutes from start to finish. *


I don't understand the whole multiple orgasms thing that women can do. I can only count one time , possibly 2 in the last 2 years where I had (2) orgasms in 1 session. And the 2nd was not as intense as the first.

I guess I envy that & am curious. After having the big one, I can't imagine it buiding up THAT good again a few minutes later. Really??? Or maybe it is just that he usually goes then too and I have not been given too many opportunities to experience a 2nd orgasm, kinda like what you said above. 

Generally, after I get mine, if he does not cum right then during my exhileration, he often likes to do the side position, and this position does not work as well for me personally. But I am happy it gives him an exciting finish.


----------



## jc32 (Jan 25, 2010)

SimplyAmorous said:


> I can only count one time , possibly 2 in the last 2 years where I had (2) orgasms in 1 session. And the 2nd was not as intense as the first.
> 
> I guess I envy that & am curious. After having the big one, I can't imagine it buiding up THAT good again a few minutes later. Really???


*From what I can tell, each orgasm gets better than the last. I know that the more times she comes, the more intense it is. The most she's had is 6 in about 15 minutes, but it's usually more like 2 or 3 in 10 minutes. She is always saying how lucky she is to have me, but I think I'm the one who's lucky. There's nothing sexier than a woman having an orgasm!*


----------



## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

Star
SimplyAmorous

Do women have better imagination? I like to have sex with my eyes closed. When I close my eyes, I either focus on my husband's toy or I am thinking about some pictures in my head. It is never about a certain man, I like to read porn stories, I create their sex scene in my mind, and that can make me very horny and I come very fast.


----------



## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

SimplyAmorous said:


> I don't understand the whole multiple orgasms thing that women can do. I can only count one time , possibly 2 in the last 2 years where I had (2) orgasms in 1 session. And the 2nd was not as intense as the first.
> 
> I guess I envy that & am curious. After having the big one, I can't imagine it buiding up THAT good again a few minutes later. Really??? Or maybe it is just that he usually goes then too and I have not been given too many opportunities to experience a 2nd orgasm, kinda like what you said above.
> 
> Generally, after I get mine, if he does not cum right then during my exhileration, he often likes to do the side position, and this position does not work as well for me personally. But I am happy it gives him an exciting finish.


I'm also curious. Come many times in a few minutes. I have an intense orgasm, if I do want to go for another one, I need about 30 minutes to rest. Then another 30 minutes. The most I came in one night was 8, and I was in my 20's. Now the most I can achieve is 3 and my MI MI is quite happy and content.


----------



## Crypsys (Apr 22, 2010)

SimplyAmorous said:


> I don't understand the whole multiple orgasms thing that women can do. I can only count one time , possibly 2 in the last 2 years where I had (2) orgasms in 1 session. And the 2nd was not as intense as the first.


Depends on the woman I guess. My wife also orgasms anally too, and for her those are the most intense. For my wife at least the first is strongest (like a rock in a pond) and each successive one is just a bit less powerful.



SimplyAmorous said:


> Generally, after I get mine, if he does not cum right then during my exhileration, he often likes to do the side position, and this position does not work as well for me personally. But I am happy it gives him an exciting finish.


Heh, that's one of my favorite positions as well.


----------



## marcopoly69 (Sep 7, 2010)

greenpearl said:


> Wow, greenpearl, good for you! It takes me at least 5 min, usually around 10 with direct stimulation, so I have never been able to come by wiggling on top of him. Are you having intercourse while you are wiggling?
> 
> 
> Yes, his toy is in my body.
> ...


You are wonderful....keep it up and be happy!


----------



## marcopoly69 (Sep 7, 2010)

greenpearl said:


> I'm also curious. Come many times in a few minutes. I have an intense orgasm, if I do want to go for another one, I need about 30 minutes to rest. Then another 30 minutes. The most I came in one night was 8, and I was in my 20's. Now the most I can achieve is 3 and my MI MI is quite happy and content.


it was always together....not too much foreplay or anything until about 2 years ago that things started to change. I was more serious about the need for us to make our sex lives better. Then, a lot of fighting, crying, and sadness came and went. Today, things are great and deem to improve with love and time. She always have 2 orgasms being the second one the greater since both come together. The first one for her is great and usually ask me to slow down for a few minutes while she recovers, and since usually I ejaculate as well (no orgasm yet) everything becomes very wet and hot so we go until our heads explode of pleasure. In the future, I'll try to use that wetness and the fact that she already finish one, to try anal with a toy and see if we can find a way to both enjoy that and being able to come.....she has never come from anal.....yet!


----------



## marcopoly69 (Sep 7, 2010)

greenpearl said:


> Star
> SimplyAmorous
> 
> Do women have better imagination? I like to have sex with my eyes closed. When I close my eyes, I either focus on my husband's toy or I am thinking about some pictures in my head. It is never about a certain man, I like to read porn stories, I create their sex scene in my mind, and that can make me very horny and I come very fast.


Like I said you are a wonderful woman......


----------



## Scannerguard (Jan 26, 2010)

Greenpearl:

Who says you have to be 100% awake to have sex? Crap. . .I think it stays harder when I am half asleep, lol.



> Then I just have to tell him that two women are licking each other.
> Does fantasy work on you?
> It works on me?
> I want to ask everybody this question!


Anyway, if you were to ask me what I would want:

A. A Dirty Talker
B. A woman with great technique. . .

I would pick A.

LOL. . .I am remembering when I was 17 years old, a bunch of guy friends and I were together at his house. (this was senior summer year so imagine this is "sexual peak") - anyway, they put in this tape and had me put on headphones and all it was a woman (who knows if she was 16 or 60 years old) talking dirty. . .we eached laughed at each other as we sat there and got a hard-on. I mean, whatever this pornographic tape was, lol, it WAS good.

(lol. . .making me laugh at my sophomoric days)

I think Seinfeld did an episode on that when all the men were in love with Elaine for that.


----------



## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

This thread has taken so many twists and turns. 

How does a woman come on top without him or her rubbing her clit with a finger, or using a vibrator? I tried wiggling on top yesterday, but could not get adequate stimulation. Do you have to lean back or forward? A few women and men have posted about woman coming on top in just a few minutes. (Using the Eroscillator I came in 90 sec, but it usually takes 3 min, and with my fingers it usually takes 5 - 10 min, sometimes much longer.) Are you always that fast, or just at certain times of month? How do I get myself to speed up? 

Serial orgasms are easy. After the first one, reduce stimulation for about a minute or two, then just resume. For me, each orgasm comes faster than the one before, so if the first took 10 min the second takes 7 min then the third takes 5 min, and they are all just as good! That's because women get more aroused after an orgasm.

Man sleepy after orgasm? My husband gets wide awake after an orgasm about half the time. That's why we can't make love at night when he has to go to sleep. He is always sleep deprived anyway. 

Skipping my orgasm - In the morning, we have only a few minutes, so during the week we only have quickies. If I want an orgasm, I masturbate afterward, while he is in the shower or has gone to work. I enjoy the intercourse with him, it makes me have goosebumps and quivers. I know he would stay around and take his time with me if he could.

Fantasy - I don't fantasize, maybe that is my problem. I used to, but I do not now. I focus on the sensations in my body. The other day I was talking while masturbating about what I was doing to myself, pretending someone was watching me, and it sent me over the top. 

Seeing him - I love watching him have an orgasm. We are in the habit of being in positions we can't see each other, or it's dark, I guess avoiding seeing each other during orgasm. I want to do more of this looking, having him look at me during mine, etc. So much to explore! How many people have actually looked at their partner while they were having an orgasm? That would be so hot!!!

We chickened out on the anal. Rather, he did. He thinks it's too tight, but it will always be tight, baby. Just do it!! It will be a few weeks before we have the time on the weekend to get back to it. From what I read, anal stimulation combined with clitoral stimulation(women) or penis stimulation (men) intensifies orgasms. 

Lasting - he lasts longer when I am on top. When he gets going and starts thrusting, I let him have a few thrusts, then I stop. Why can't he stop himself like that when he is on top? Why do men have so little self-control? It's not like I'm going to get up and run away!! Damn! I don't get it. He does lose his erection a bit here and there if I am on top not moving much or I am not touching him for a while because I am drifting away into what he is doing to me.

Flirting talk - he gets hot when I tell him I am wet. I was talking about sex with a good friend, and I told him I used to need KY Jelly all the time, but now... and he would not let me finish, he said it was TMI, he was getting aroused and did not want to since we are friends. 

Positions - the best feeling is doggie style or him sitting in a chair and I am on top with my back to him. The best emotional position is missionary with him on top. Sideways is good for getting the vibrator or manual stimulation in the easiest.

He does not like to talk about sex much, so this forum is good for me


----------



## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

Sara Ann

When I am on top of my husband wiggling, it is missionary position, just I am on top. My face is on his face, or my face is at the side of his head. My clit is touching his toy, that's why it is easy for me to come. Please try again! It is very intimate. I come every time this way.


----------



## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

Ok, I will try it. I was sitting up on him wiggling around, thinking I was supposed to rub my clit on his pelvis, but there was nothing to grab, so I could not feel anything. Have you ever tried to rub his toy on your clit? I have tried that only briefly, thinking it probably did nothing for him so I stopped.

I don't like vibrators, as they seem unnatural, although they make me come faster. I do not like taking vibrators to bed, and when he is in me, he feels so good, I am distracted and do not focus on the sensation in my clit, and then I cannot get an orgasm. It is so complicated! I really want to make it easier for me to climax, so it is not so much work for either of us. But then, I have read of women who take much longer than I do, or who repress and cannot climax or who fake it, so I know it could be worse.


----------



## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

Sara Ann said:


> Ok, I will try it. I was sitting up on him wiggling around, thinking I was supposed to rub my clit on his pelvis, but there was nothing to grab, so I could not feel anything. Have you ever tried to rub his toy on your clit? I have tried that only briefly, thinking it probably did nothing for him so I stopped.
> 
> I don't like vibrators, as they seem unnatural, although they make me come faster. I do not like taking vibrators to bed, and when he is in me, he feels so good, I am distracted and do not focus on the sensation in my clit, and then I cannot get an orgasm. It is so complicated! I really want to make it easier for me to climax, so it is not so much work for either of us. But then, I have read of women who take much longer than I do, or who repress and cannot climax or who fake it, so I know it could be worse.


I know that a lot of Chinese women can't have orgasms until they are in their 30's. Even after that, they can have very little. Chinese are very conservative about sex. Women are very passive in bed. Chinese men still seek virgins to get married. If they don't have a virgin wife, they complain. I have scolded quite a few men. 
I come clitly. When I masturbate, I just need to use my finger to rub my clit. My husband only made me come once when he is on top, he does make me come orally whenever he licks me. 
I am on my husband, his toy has to touch my clit, sometimes I just need his toy's head. I just need his and mine touch each other, then I rub against it. My man man fantasy helps a lot. My husband doesn't mind it when I use my fantasy to achieve my orgasms. I am not thinking about any men I know or any men in movies. Just male bodies.


----------



## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

Sara Ann said:


> Ok, I will try it. I was sitting up on him wiggling around, thinking I was supposed to rub my clit on his pelvis, but there was nothing to grab, so I could not feel anything. Have you ever tried to rub his toy on your clit? I have tried that only briefly, thinking it probably did nothing for him so I stopped.
> 
> I don't like vibrators, as they seem unnatural, although they make me come faster. I do not like taking vibrators to bed, and when he is in me, he feels so good, I am distracted and do not focus on the sensation in my clit, and then I cannot get an orgasm. It is so complicated! I really want to make it easier for me to climax, so it is not so much work for either of us. But then, I have read of women who take much longer than I do, or who repress and cannot climax or who fake it, so I know it could be worse.


I prefer real flesh too. The feeling and warmth is so different. We don't use condoms either. He shoots all over me. But we haven't made a mistake for the last seven years. He is good!
For other people, I am very liberal, they can do whatever they want to do. I don't judge anybody.


----------



## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

I am picturing how I am going to wiggle, and if his toy is in my body, how do I rub my clit against it? If I lie down on him and wiggle, my clit will be on his stomach or lower groin area which would be soft. I have read quite a few sex books, and nobody has ever taught this technique, so I am very intrigued with it.

I also notice when I masturbate I can come faster if I am sitting up than if I am laying down. So if the wiggling does not do anything, next time I will use the vibrator while I am on top. The problem is I need stimulation in whatever spot I like that day, and if the stimulation changes even a little bit then my buildup goes away, so I have to really concentrate and not move at all from one spot, when I am trying to make it fast. It's all so complicated. When I am by myself, I can make myself come in 3 min but when he is there and we are laying down and his body is distracting me then it takes longer. Even when I am masturbating laying down it takes me 10 min. I don't know why it is faster when I am all alone. I so much want it to be faster when I am with him! Can anybody please help me?


----------



## tjohnson (Mar 10, 2010)

my wife comes first because it is easy for her to do that and she usally is on top. Interestingly, I am usually the one who wants foreplay and sometimes she wants to go straigt to intercourse. then again her motor warms up quick. To me this is the only way that makes sense unless you get dry or want to stop after you climax. 

I think it is weird for him to only want to go down on you "when he is really turned on". I am not sure why he would want to wait till he is done to work on you when doing it before would make you more at the same level of arousal when intercourse begins. 
It is not uncommon for men to "lose controll" while on top.


----------



## OhGeesh (Jan 5, 2010)

Depends!! Not that it matters because both of us will one way or another. If she said I need you to stand on one leg jumping up and down singing Barry White that's what I would do.

She jokes and says I'm going to be like those people on hoarders but with toys........lol. We only have like 5, but she things it's funny.

The fact of the matter is for us as much as I want all of the "freakiness" she is just happy with me, my equipment, and alot of kissing. Add in some masurbation while I'm on top etc and she is golden everytime.

My wife is very clitoral! Direct stimulation is a must 90% of the time. After almost 20years I couldn't be happier maybe a little more freaky and a little more frequent, but very happy!


----------



## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

So your wives have an orgasm every time you have sex? We do it 3-4 times a week, and often he is so tired late at night or early in the morning before work, that I don't allow myself the time I need. Maybe that's not the correct way to think? 

He has been going down on me again, after our talks and he feels closer to me, and I love it! 

If he was not so sleep deprived all the time during the week (and he looks so tired and is gone 16 hrs a day at work), I would be more demanding. For now, I am demanding only on the weekends.


----------



## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

To sum it up: Yes, if the girl can climax within 5 min.

I have not heard a peep from the guys whose girls can take longer than that. On one site which posed the question how long the girls take to climax from masturbating, the most common answer was 10-15 min, with several saying they fell asleep on themselves. And we know some women have never had a climax. 

What about it guys? If your girl needs more than 5 min, be honest - you ignore her or she comes second every time?


----------



## jmsclayton (Sep 5, 2010)

Sara Ann

Becuase when your focus on you-that is why it can come faster-there is not that relational aspect to it that invovles another person. It takes time when another person is involved because of two minds working together. 

Thoughts? 

Judith


----------



## jmsclayton (Sep 5, 2010)

Sara ANn 

Orgasm is learned for a woman. MAn it is instinctive. Also he needs to learn ejaculation control. That is vital. He can ... She can have as many as she needs before IC. It is really important taht it happens some to most of the time because that makes the pleasure for intercourse that much more for a woman too... It helps in the intercourse-main event

It is vital taht both of you learn touch techniques taht can help with what you both want. This is a learning process throughout life. 

It happens at different times for the orgasm to happen with what you want. The emotions and your relaxation and arousal plays a huge part in where you are emotionally and mentally to be able to do more or less. It is vital for a woman. 

Depending on where you are mentally if you can't get there mentally visuals help. It is vital that you can learn about yourself to enjoy in IC with him too. 

Thoughts? 

Judith


----------



## HopeinHouston (Mar 1, 2010)

Sara Ann said:


> To sum it up: Yes, if the girl can climax within 5 min.
> 
> I have not heard a peep from the guys whose girls can take longer than that. On one site which posed the question how long the girls take to climax from masturbating, the most common answer was 10-15 min, with several saying they fell asleep on themselves. And we know some women have never had a climax.
> 
> What about it guys? If your girl needs more than 5 min, be honest - you ignore her or she comes second every time?



My wife takes various ammounts of time to climax. Generally we will make love (foreplay and intercourse included) anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour. Actual intercourse I tend to last 15-25 minutes before climaxing. If we haven;t had sex in a week or more (with our schedules that will sometimes happen) then it might be quicker for me. 

I love to go down on my wife and do almost every time we have sex. She will often climax first before we ever having intercourse, and will almost always climax at least once during intercourse before me. Generally speaking she will have on average 2 climaxes - and maybe 3 - before I ever cum. 

I am sorry that you are having problems in this area but please don't project your problems out on all of us as though everyone has the same issue.


----------



## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

Judith - I think you are right. 

HopeInHousing - you are a good man! Do you ever have morning quickies, and does she have an orgasm then? How did you work your way up from the male average of 2-3 min to 15-25 min? 

We are just starting from almost square 1 in our sex lives....I avoided sex with him that past 10 yrs due to my own issues, so I even totally forgot what it feels like to be licked. When he did that the other day, I almost died and went to heaven. I did not know it feels so good. Thanks for all the replies.


----------



## louiswin (Nov 4, 2010)

My wife always comes first. This has just been a habit with us. She gets on top and when she is finished, I get to take her in any position I choose. 

We are both in our mid 40's.


----------



## DanF (Sep 27, 2010)

I do my best to make my wife come first. Once in a while, she doesn't come at all and let's me know that she's not going to. Sometimes she'll get a double, once in a blue moon she have a triple.
It is very seldom that I lose control and come first if she's going to come.


----------



## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

If he were to let me come first, he would not be able to get back his erection, and that could be related to his age (50's). Sometimes, he wants to get together just to give me an orgasm and he doesn't care if he has one or not. So now I don't take it personal that he goes first. It's how his body works. There have been times he has gone down on me, and then he can't get an erection afterward and that is a bummer for me, although he is ok with it. My friend is dating a man of the same age, and although they are hot and heavy in lust, and that guy has the same issue after he goes down on my friend: he has lost his erection, so they will wait until the middle of the night or next morning for IC.


----------



## takris (Sep 22, 2010)

Sara Ann said:


> To sum it up: Yes, if the girl can climax within 5 min.
> 
> I have not heard a peep from the guys whose girls can take longer than that. On one site which posed the question how long the girls take to climax from masturbating, the most common answer was 10-15 min, with several saying they fell asleep on themselves. And we know some women have never had a climax.
> 
> What about it guys? If your girl needs more than 5 min, be honest - you ignore her or she comes second every time?


Reading this thread makes me wish my wife would seek help. She is tremendously insecure, but early in our marriage, I convinced her to see a doctor. She has physiological problems which make it very hard to climax.

We both think that the shortest time for her, even after about half an hour of foreplay, is 20 minutes. 40 minutes is normal. When we were in our thirtys, she had three orgasms a few times, but we were at it for a total of three hours. She is mortified at the thought of masturbation.

She will never accept that she is not normal. With sex a few times a week, she occasionally does it just for me.

After about 25 years of it, I'll admit that after a while, its hard to keep an erection. I saw a doctor for ED meds who laughed and said that she needs to make the appointment, because I'm above average in that department.

I know what everyone thinks: Its something I'm doing wrong. This was absolutely not a problem before we dated, and I didn't have to be so creative. Had a brief liason with a blond HS teacher when I was her aide, and she was non-stop orgasms. For my wife, if she can be talked into being on top, she can cut down the time to 20 minutes, but that's only after alot of caressing and oral.

She gets angry about the frequency of 2 to 3 times per week, and that it sometimes is more of a weekend thing, proving to her that I don't need it for some reason. I remind her that Sat and Sun are the only days we can get away with spending a few hours in bed without sleeping.


----------



## getiton (Mar 30, 2011)

Hi,

I will probably get some backlash on this, but I think women who aren't experiencing orgasms the majority of the times you are intimate with your partners are doing yourselves a disservice. 

During the first few years of dating (I met him when I was 18), I was never able to have an orgasm. There was plenty of raging hormones, foreplay, and satisfaction, but I think my lack of orgasms was due to being insecure, self-conscious, and not being comfortable telling him what felt good. After we got married, and I matured, I was able to get an orgasm with my ex-husband the majority of time we had sex. There was alot of oral and manual stimulation. Having said that, when we did have quickies, he came too quickly for me to have time to have an orgasm. He always waited for me to have an orgasm first. Like most men, he was near comatose after he had his orgasm, so it was important to both of us for him to take care of me first.

With my current husband, we are both able to have multiple orgasms each time we have sex. :smthumbup: He typically has 3, but has had 6 once, with no downtime in between. He says the later ones are the best and most intense. I typically have 3-4 each time. Some times, but not usually, when we each have alot of mental chatter due to work or kid related stress, we have to work to have one orgasm. I do use my vibrator during sex with him some times (to change it up), and those orgasms are really intense and they come very fast. 

In terms of positions, our favorite is 'doggie' because the thrusts are deeper and harder, and I can angle myself to where I can feel more. My other favorites are 'cowgirl' and 'reverse cowgirl'. Missionary NEVER works for me, but is good for him to slow down between the orgasms. If he continues to thrust hard as I have my orgasms, the feeling is more intense and prolonged.

I have less feeling if we have sex too early in the morning before my body has had time to have blood flow. The best time for me is in the late afternoon and early to mid evening.


----------



## Syrum (Feb 22, 2011)

The more foreplay you have and the hornier you are when you start, the quicker you will cum.

I find I need hard grinding against my clit to cum. I can cum on top or in missionary, and the length of time it takes depends on many variables, but I almost all ways do before he does and often several times.


----------



## magnoliagal (Mar 30, 2011)

I've always come first because the best way for me to orgasm is through intercourse. But I'm pretty fast so it's not a big deal. 10 minutes or so of foreplay and I'm ready. Climb on top, finish then he does whatever he wants. Am experimenting with new positions and it takes some practice to get it right for me. If I don't no biggie there is always tomorrow. I think of it as extended foreplay. 

Oh and I'm 44.


----------



## Amplexor (Feb 13, 2008)

"I am here to dispel the myth of the female orgasm. It doesn't exist. I've been with hundreds of women and not one of them has ever had an orgasm."

- Gilbert Gottfried


----------



## Wrench (Mar 21, 2011)

My wife intensly orgasms with about 2 mins of finger play, then I get 2 mins to finish or she's bored. It's been this way for 16 years

The girl before her would play with me all night if I wanted to, I've tried everything to loosen her up. She's not faking them either, just a quick draw. 

I bet she could have multiples if she tried.


----------



## Dr. Rockstar (Mar 23, 2011)

I guess I'm really lucky in that my wife can climax pretty regularly after I'm done by making sure she's on top. She sort of requires it (and I'm not getting into that story, so there!). From the moment we start actual intercourse it generally takes about 10 minutes. That also includes a fair amount of foreplay and sexual touching, but that's okay because that's some of my favorite stuff anyway.  

There are times when she can't, but on the other hand there are times I can't, either. Either way, the only times she can't cum are when she's tired or otherwise knows that it just isn't going to happen, or when I'm completely flacid and unable to stay inside her. Regardless, we've both discovered that there's a lot more to sex than just orgasm.

It's like a chocolate shake with a cherry on top: Just because you can't get the cherry, are you really going to turn down the whole shake?


----------



## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

My partner almost always cums first... With my current partner, multiple times before me, and then multiple times again after. However, I think she doesn't often (ever?) cum from intercourse, unless we use a toy at the same time for clitoral stimulation. She hasn't complained/commented on that, though...

C


----------



## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

So I talked to my partner about this yesterday... She's only cum once with intercourse, and there was extenuating circumstances. So we're going to practice, and see what we can come up with. I'm hoping that once we ditch the condoms, it might make a improvement for her as well as me.

Ah, the things we do for those we love... 

C


----------



## jezza (Jan 12, 2011)

I'm right!! Sex is what every one ELSE is doing!

I have always made sure that the lady cums first. Even when I was 18 I still needed 10-15 minutes between - my c0ck was really sensitive. 
Now, that I am mid 40's and my wife kindly allows me to have sex with her every couple of months, I make sure she comes first because once I've 'deposited' I get very sleepy....However if my wife continued feeling horny and say gave me a BJ I could probably continue after 30 mins.... But for that to happen I'd have to get a new wife!


----------



## 2nd_t!me iz_best (Feb 28, 2011)

PBear said:


> So we're going to practice, and see what we can come up with.
> C


lots of practice is always good when it cums to sex


----------



## Bigwayneo (Jan 22, 2011)

All the time. In fact for being out of shape I have great stamina.


----------



## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

No, but she certainly leaves before I do.


----------



## OhhShiney (Apr 8, 2011)

Sara Ann said:


> Guys, esp those in their 50's, I'm wondering how much foreplay you have with your wife, how long you keep an erection, and whether she ever has an orgasm before you do?



We are both in our mid 50s. Both of us were married before. I had several relationships when I was younger, followed by a long, sexually unsatisfying marriage. She had a dull first marriage, followed by an exciting second marriage that ended with horrible infidelity and anger. We both brought baggage to the bedroom, but an incredible amount of passion for each other, mind-blowingly so. I've had to take some medications on and off that can impact my functioning, and she does not lubricate naturally all the time. But we make do, readily! My libido is not very different than when I was younger, and I actually enjoy things better as they are now than when I was in a very unhappy marriage. I am making love 2-3 times a week with my wife, which is far more frequently than what I lived with from the ages of 20-50, when I had sex once every month or so with my wife, and spent a lot of time doing it myself. So, age may be a factor, but it's not the ONLY factor.

I like foreplay much more than my wife. She likes to jump right into intercourse, sometimes before I'm ready. I find foreplay to be an aphrodesiac. If I'm hurried into intercourse, I can lose my erection, as I feel as if I'm being rushed. Sometimes when I can't keep an erection for some reason, we continue, and we are able to bring her to orgasm. I find this incredibly exciting to behold, though it took a while to accept that it was OK. Sometimes when she doesn't lubricate naturally, we use various gels or creams. All in all, it's been a cooperative enterprise that took me quite a while to fully appreciate. 


We often both don't have an orgasm during the same session; we will treat whoever has an orgasm to time to relax and enjoy the afterglow. We sometimes continue, but not always. Sometimes neither of us have an orgasm. (This is something that it took me a while to get used to, as I was in a marriage where if I came first, she would get mad, but if she came first she would fall asleep and not really care what happened. ) 

I found, over time, that the statement "life is all about the journey" is very true. An orgasm is only a small part of the act. The rest of the intimacy is a huge part of the act. It's actually fun to enjoy your partner have an orgasm, and to lend a hand to the process. It can be an end in itself. It's also great to simply lay back and be pleasured without having to worry about pleasing your partner right away. Over time, things even themselves out. 

Where we are now, it seems, is to *practice patience*. She taught me to forget about "goal-oriented" sex. The more I focused on orgasm, either mutually, or just mine, or just hers, the less fulfilling things were. The pressure to make both of us happy would result in a dull time and resentment. This was not healthy.


----------



## romantic_guy (Nov 8, 2011)

I am 56 and my wife is 55. Most of the time she has hers first or we climax together. When I cum, I am done! So on the rare times that happens I wake myself up will give her oral (which I love doing...win-win!). 

My wife is fortunate in that she can orgasm relatively quickly and easily. That was true even when we were dating in High School (but that is another story). We must use a position that gives her clitoral stimulation or one that frees my finger, her finger, or a vibrator to give her that. Her best position is on top. Her clit gets the needed stimulation that way and the added bonus is me being able to suck her perfect little tits (there seems to be a direct line from her nipples to her clitoris...any other ladies out there like that???). When I do that she climaxes in about 60 seconds! So we start with a position that is best for her and if she goes before I do we finish with a position that is best for me (usually doggie).

I am the one who loves foreplay and I seem to need it more than she does. I could take hours enjoying each others bodies...and her body is HOT!!!


----------



## 5stringpicker (Feb 11, 2012)

Ok, I'm mid sixties, in good physical shape and can pass for late forties/early fifties. Never needed Viagra. My wife is several years younger in her early fifties. Been married 15 years. She normally has multiples. Same with most I've dated. I don't want to be too descriptive but my pecker has a natural upward bend. I learned early on how to position myself, in the missionary position, to stimulate her g-spot after her first one.


----------



## flnative (Jul 16, 2011)

Almost every time. Luckily she does it quickly most of the time.


----------



## SoCalHubby (Jan 7, 2012)

I am 50, wife 41. She cums first the vast majority of time, typically 1-2, occasionally 3, which fills me w awe! 
But sometimes she'll be off her game and she'll encourage me to cum without her doing the same and I comply, but it's not as erotic/fulfilling.
For me, "making" my wife cum is the most erotic part of sex!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## MaritimeGuy (Jul 28, 2012)

My partner takes longer to orgasm. We engage in a fair amount of foreplay. I'm not really watching the clock so I can't say precisely how long. From start to finish, including foreplay, sex usually takes about an hour for us. 

She doesn't cum every time but if she does she needs to cum first. I lose interest pretty quickly once I cum. 

During foreplay my erection will subside but it doesn't take long to resume once we start into intercourse.


----------



## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

I got tired of crying over him. After 20+ years of marriage I left him, I am now divorced, and my FWB always makes sure I cum first.


----------



## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

haha, we don't often see a zombie thread bumped by the OP with a nice update like this. Good for you Sara! Sounds like you're workin it...


----------



## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

For the record, I have a lot of control and she ALWAYS comes first.


----------



## Cloaked (Sep 15, 2013)

Sadly, my wife has never had an orgasm. I feel responsible. Put a lot of effort in near the beginning of our marriage and have nothing to show for it.
Am only allowed to do missionary. Doesn't do the job.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

Cloaked said:


> Sadly, my wife has never had an orgasm. I feel responsible. Put a lot of effort in near the beginning of our marriage and have nothing to show for it.
> Am only allowed to do missionary. Doesn't do the job.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I don't think I could personally be with a woman who doesn't orgasm. Not for the long term anyway. Too much of a blow to my own self esteem. I can easily imagine feeling like a failure.


----------



## Stonewall (Jul 5, 2011)

She always comes first! I consider it a challenge and Stonewall never ever loses a battle!


----------



## honeysuckle (Feb 23, 2014)

I always come first ( multiple orgasms ) we sometimes have ALL NIGHT SESSIONS Mr honeysukle usually comes twice 1st during our sessions, which may/ may not coincide with one of my many multiple orgasms, we always come together to end a session. Mr honeysuckle has the amazing ability to almost come,hold back,almost come,hold back,he can keep this up for upto an hour which give me time for multiple multiple orgasms 
We are both in our mid 40's


----------



## MysticSoul (Mar 3, 2014)

Mr. Mystic makes sure to take care of me at least once before PIV. It was a compromise we made. I take forever. He doesn't. So he makes sure I'm the first to come ALWAYS.


----------



## Just Wondering (Dec 20, 2011)

For me I truly love to make sure I last way pass her orgasm . Its really not until then does her Pu88y becomes alive and after she comes the natural juices and warmth of it all feels so nice. I always make sure I last long enough to enjoy that. At times I find it hard to believe, But my Wife without foreplay towhich she as no value for will orgasm in 2-3 mins. Even if that sounds great the bad thing about that is she is done. One and Done. So what started out yrs. ago as a quickie has become the norm. And I so complain about it. Because four sessions in a month average becomes only 10 mins. of sex times that by 12 months and I get about two hrs. of sex a year. But one side of me says ,Well I get it once a week and enjoy myself. I would so love to make a pig out of my self sometime with her. And she does not enjoy Oral of any kind . Poor me ???


----------



## Don-Juan (Sep 1, 2013)

Been married 28 yrs, for the majority of that she "came" first. But all of the sudden(the last 18 months or so) she has decided that I need to come first with p.i.v.! I don't know what this is all about, but I think she likes me to play in the "mess"!

I do know that it has really mixed things up!

FYI.... I am not "fast", It takes me a while to finish, she takes a good solid 10 - 20 min to finish, I may take up to an hour!!!
I dont think she realizes how much I enjoy her going first is to me! It brings me MUCH pleasure to bring her to the "O" once or twice or more!!
When she goes first it will not take me as long!!!! Maybe 10 mins tops!


----------



## oldflyguy (Sep 15, 2011)

WOW, old thread,

I would never go until my wife did. Unless she is just giving me some man relief.

She loved it when we would go together also, it had taken a few years to completely learn her signals at first. She would have such fulfilling ones and even after 20 years, she still got emotional afterwords and just want to hold each other. Unfortunately, the last one was a few years ago....

Yes, I am now 50 and could still take care of business, but she does not enjoy life anymore...



OFG


----------



## FoodFrenzy (Oct 27, 2013)

This IS an old thread! However, it's kind of a fun topic.

My DH and I switch, depending what we are in the mood for. Sometimes we'll have PIV and he'll come first, and then he'll finish me orally. Sometimes I'll go first, and then hop on, and then sometimes we'll come together. We've gotten pretty good with the timing, though I can't orgasm from just PIV, I usually need something else going on too.


----------



## Tommy518 (Nov 28, 2011)

She almost always comes first. Usually I go down on her as that's a virtual guarantee, and maybe 1/4 the time I get her off through intercourse first and then let myself come. Sometimes I use my hands during foreplay to get her off, but she always prefers oral and intercourse. 

I go very slow at oral and take my time to build it so the O is big and long. She likes that the best, but in the morning when it's a quickie, she'll straddle me on top and I'll work the nips and she'll come very fast. Just depends how much time we have and the general mood. 

The exception is if it's a spontaneous rough thing, and then it's frantic and whatever happens, happens. A lot of times, I'll take my time savoring it after she gets off (which is why I like to get her off first) and she'll get sensitive again and get off a second time. I don't necessarily work at that, but it's nice when it happens.


----------



## CuddleBug (Nov 26, 2012)

Sara Ann said:


> Guys, esp those in their 50's, I'm wondering how much foreplay you have with your wife, how long you keep an erection, and whether she ever has an orgasm before you do?
> 
> In our marriage, we got in the habit of him having an orgasm first, and then he will use his wonderful fingers on me (or I do myself), but by then he is already half asleep and it is not exciting for me. I get turned on very fast and have not needed any foreplay, so he never does more than a few seconds of foreplay on me (or none), but I am curious what it would be like and what I may be missing. My husband is in his early 50's, I'm a few years younger, and we are both in great health and physically active.



No.

Unless she wants me to go down on her first and I use the small vib at the same time.....then yes.


----------



## Stone7812 (Mar 16, 2014)

When we used to have a active sex life YES.


----------



## omgitselaine (Sep 5, 2013)

I've always been fortunate that I would often cum easily aNd quickly ...... 99% of the time prior to my lover so there was never an issue of him cumming too soon !?!?! YAY !


----------

