# Help regarding pain during sexual intercourse.



## maniac84 (Jan 16, 2011)

Hi guys,
I'm newly married with my wife about 3 months already. But until now, we are still unable to make love. I don't know what's wrong... I'm still cannot put my penis into my wife's ***** because she told me she will feel painful. At first I thought her 'hole' is small because she has not make love before, so, we tried to practice by just putting one of my fingers into it in hope that she will get used to it with something inside her 'hole'. She's feeling very painful in the beginning, but until now already 3 months she still feel painful with me just putting one finger. I've tried to put two finger into it but she just feel more pain. I am thinking, with fingers already so pain, not to say putting my penis into it...Please help us guys...


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## janesmith (Nov 29, 2010)

go to the dr to find out of there is physically anything wrong down there that there is not a medical reason for her pain. then go from there.


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## lovelieswithin (Apr 29, 2010)

Dyspareunia is pretty common - but not really talked about a whole lot (pain during sex) and it can be caused by numerous reasons. It's for your wife's safety that she be checked out by a Doctor to ensure there isn't something harmful going on inside her body that is causing the pain. If she is afraid to go, offer up your support and go along with her! afterall, your sex life together is at stake! It is going to eventually cause to become more and more annoyed; then she will become resentful of your insensitivity. Tackle this problem ASAP!


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

maniac84 said:


> I'm newly married with my wife about 3 months already. But until now, we are still unable to make love. I don't know what's wrong... I'm still cannot put my penis into my wife's ***** because she told me she will feel painful. At first I thought her 'hole' is small because she has not make love before, so, we tried to practice by just putting one of my fingers into it in hope that she will get used to it with something inside her 'hole'. She's feeling very painful in the beginning, but until now already 3 months she still feel painful with me just putting one finger. I've tried to put two finger into it but she just feel more pain. I am thinking, with fingers already so pain, not to say putting my penis into it...Please help us guys...


 Me & my husband was exactly where you are at 3 months into marriage. I remember thinking how in the world are we going to get that thing into this hole. Funny looking back as now, after 21 yrs, I wish that thing was a little bigger! 

So after 3 months of this trying & yes, the pain (husband was gentle, not into hurting me too much) I decided to go see my Gynocologist, he examined me, and scheduled me for a Hymenectomy Pros and Cons of Hymenectomy and Hymenotomy - Associated Content from Yahoo! - associatedcontent.com But 1st I had to take a blood pregnancy test, shock of all shocks, I got a call that I was expecting, so no surgery. It took another 5 months (8 months married at this point) for my husband to fully penetrate me. 

Some women have a really thick & resistent Hymen, but if you keep at it, I would imagine in due time, you will reach your destination. He started with fingers too, but I wanted him to keep trying , keep forcing just a little each time. Do your best to really asouse her,  use alot of Lube if you have too , and just keep at it. 

IF the stress gets too much, just go see the Obgyn. But it is a surgery, so not sure you want to go this far unless it is really stressing the marraige. Looking back, I am glad I was surprisingly pregnant so it was avoided.


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## maniac84 (Jan 16, 2011)

SimplyAmorous said:


> Me & my husband was exactly where you are at 3 months into marriage. I remember thinking how in the world are we going to get that thing into this hole. Funny looking back as now, after 21 yrs, I wish that thing was a little bigger!
> 
> So after 3 months of this trying & yes, the pain (husband was gentle, not into hurting me too much) I decided to go see my Gynocologist, he examined me, and scheduled me for a Hymenectomy Pros and Cons of Hymenectomy and Hymenotomy - Associated Content from Yahoo! - associatedcontent.com But 1st I had to take a blood pregnancy test, shock of all shocks, I got a call that I was expecting, so no surgery. It took another 5 months (8 months married at this point) for my husband to fully penetrate me.
> 
> ...



Actually guys, if I use one finger, I think I can go into it, so I don't think the Hymen is too think or resistant. I can pull my finger in and out, in and out. But, with one finger going in, my wife still feel pain. Just slight pain. 
If I try two finger, the pain is intense and unbearable. Do you guys think my wife's 'hole' is too small? Is there anyway to make it larger like practicing every night with finger going in?


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## Deejo (May 20, 2008)

lovelieswithin said:


> Dyspareunia is pretty common - but not really talked about a whole lot (pain during sex) and it can be caused by numerous reasons. It's for your wife's safety that she be checked out by a Doctor to ensure there isn't something harmful going on inside her body that is causing the pain. If she is afraid to go, offer up your support and go along with her! afterall, your sex life together is at stake! It is going to eventually cause to become more and more annoyed; then she will become resentful of your insensitivity. Tackle this problem ASAP!


Have your wife look at these links:

Dyspareunia - Painful Intercourse

Vulvar Vestibulitis


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## maniac84 (Jan 16, 2011)

Deejo said:


> Have your wife look at these links:
> 
> Dyspareunia - Painful Intercourse
> 
> Vulvar Vestibulitis



I see.
Does these diseases can be cured without medication? Or it just won't go away?


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## Draguna (Jan 13, 2011)

maniac84 said:


> I see.
> Does these diseases can be cured without medication? Or it just won't go away?


The first is just a term that bundles a few conditions which cause this. The second seems to be inflammatory or caused by irritation, so it might have a cure.

An example of a mental one is:
Vaginismus - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
This is a rare one, but quite a *****. Even if she might be in the mood for many many things, she just cannot do it.

The only thing that can help though for now, is knowing what causes this. For that, you might have to visit your GP/obgyn.


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## maniac84 (Jan 16, 2011)

Hi Guys,
Yesterday I found out that the reason that my wife feel pain is because I've stretch he ***** if I use two finger. It's not because of the disease you guys mentioned. If I use one finger, she won't feel pain. So, I still can't put my penis in because... of course, my penis is bigger than one finger. Any opinions on how can the 'hole' be bigger?


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## moonangel (Jan 19, 2011)

Really, she needs to see her doctor. You sound like you're fourteen. You CANNOT force her hole bigger. The vagina is a muscle and will expand and relax if it is normal and if your wife enjoys sex with you. If her hole will not not expand then she might not be attracted to you.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

maniac84 said:


> Hi Guys,
> Yesterday I found out that the reason that my wife feel pain is because I've stretch he ***** if I use two finger. It's not because of the disease you guys mentioned. If I use one finger, she won't feel pain. So, I still can't put my penis in because... of course, my penis is bigger than one finger. Any opinions on how can the 'hole' be bigger?


 So you seen her OBGYN? You didnt ask him/her these things ? Not sure what word you used to be deleted out. A little confused.


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## tattoomommy (Aug 14, 2009)

Hmmmm the hooha is certainly meant to stretch. It can accomodate any size penis as well as pushing a baby out! Have her to go to the GYN and tell them whats up and see what they suggest. Sometimes (after 3 years of marriage and having a child) if I'm not fully ready to go he has to take it really slow because it'll hurt. Have you used lube at all? Sometimes that's enough to make all the difference.


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