# At my Crossroads--Ignore or Call OW



## lady323 (Nov 12, 2010)

As you some of you know, I am going through a divorce (please see my previous posts for the history of my situation). 

Anyway, the STBX came back from Canada this week and he is now sleeping in the spare bedroom downstairs. I thought I could handle this but the OW calls him constantly. He is still denying there’s anything between them but I believe he’s in an EA no matter what he says.

Now the issue at hand--I was moving things around in the spare bedroom and when I moved his suitcase, I saw a binder with info on the OW new house she’s building. I regret doing this, but I opened the binder and saw that there was paperwork from a law office addressed to him and her regarding “Your purchase from xxxx Homes Ltd in which they indicate they have received a copy of the Agreement of Purchase and Sale. All along the STBX has been telling me he’s just helping her with this. If that is the case, why would his name by mentioned on the letter from the lawyer? I almost want to call the OW and tell her what he tells me and what he is actually doing.

Also when I first became involved with STBX his 2nd wife (that should have been a red flag to me) had called me and told me she was his wife. I had no idea he was married at the time and I when I told the STBX his wife called me, he told me they were separated etc. and I believed him and the pile of crap he fed me. Now I feel I am in the same situation as wife #2. I so want to call the OW just to give her a warning and let her know she was the 3rd person in our marriage. I am not sure how much money he has given her but I am so pissed that he has not contributed anything financially to our marriage and now it seems he can give money to her? 

Sorry for the rambling but I guess I just need to vent as maybe that will get rid of my urge to call the OW and give her a piece of my mind.


----------



## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

I realize you want to punish him and to unload on her but there is a high probability neither of them care. Just as you bought what he told you, and ignored Wife No. 2's warning, she could do the same with your warning. 

You ended up with him, despite the warning, and now apparently it's her turn.

Let it go.


----------



## Stretch (Dec 12, 2012)

If she is married tell her husband. If you know them tell her friends, employer and co-workers. 

That is the price to pay, not her feelings.


----------



## BetrayedNoMore (Mar 13, 2013)

There are multiple ways you can handle this.

1. Just disconnect from him and keep your head up high. The OW put herself in this situation. Let her deal with it when it comes back around on its own.

2. Expose to everyone.


----------



## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

You're divorcing the guy. Get him out of your house and move on with your life. Don't worry about what he's doing or what she's doing. The only reason he's still an issue for you is because you let him into your home and gave him a bed. Once a hot pan burns you, don't keep holding it.


----------



## Overthemoon88 (Jan 10, 2013)

Any possibility for you to scan the housing documents and forward them to your D lawyer ? You may be able to claim back the 'marital money' he expended on OW. Just a thought ....


----------

