# How often does she initiate?



## MrNightly (Feb 6, 2017)

How often does your wife initiate sexual intimancy?

And this doesn't mean respond to your advances, but actually initiate? Make you feel desired, wanted by her words and actions.


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

At least half of the time. And we have sex every morning.


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

I put every time, because she invariably turns me down if I initiate.


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## Ynot (Aug 26, 2014)

When I was married I wouldn't say my ex ever really initiated sex as much I would say she allowed it to happen. In my current relationship, so far nothing on her part has been required, mainly because I have never allow enough time for her to act. She has said her default is "yes" and so far there have been lots and lots of "yes". When we get together we practically tear each others clothes off.


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## Herschel (Mar 27, 2016)

My last ex (whom I was married to for 5 years) initiated most of the time. It would be 50/50 when I initiated, but I think it was because she was alpha and she is crazy. It was fun though. I won't even discuss current gf


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## C3156 (Jun 13, 2012)

uhtred said:


> I put every time, because she invariably turns me down if I initiate.


Regrettably, I too fall into this category


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## Mr. Nail (Apr 26, 2011)

Wrong question. It should have asked Does she initiate?
So I guess Never is the answer. Strangely, she will get worried and fret a bit if I don't initiate for much more than a week. But , really, it is my only way to exercise my right to say "NO"


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## Volunteer86 (Aug 2, 2017)

My wife wished I would more


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## Spitfire (Jun 6, 2015)

My wife initiated maybe 3 times per year. My success rate with initiating was around 20% or so. Since I stopped initiating altogether she'll initiate once per month to have reset sex. It's not very fulfilling so I'm thinking I'll probably start rejecting her.


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## Rocky Mountain Yeti (Apr 23, 2017)

I can't answer as we are in a period of transition.

Early on it was me close to 100%

Then things slowed down and there was much rejection, so I pretty much stopped and it generally happened if she initiated. For a long while, I would put it at her initiating 75%--but the who wasn't as important as the frequency (or, more accurately, the lack thereof).

Now, she's let me know she's ready to ramp things back up, but she doesn't want to be responsibility for initiation. So we're in a period of flux as we figure out when/how often will work for both of us, but I'm guessing it'll be back to me at 75% or more. And I'm okay with that if we can sustain more regular physical intimacy.


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## Lila (May 30, 2014)

I used to initiate all of the time. Now I never do. I wait for him to initiate if he's in the mood. 

Sent from my SM-G900V using Tapatalk


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

She initiates sex about 50% but makes me feel desired every day by grabbing my rump, package, touching my chest or shoulders and complementing me on my looks as well as flirting.

Didn't start that way. I use to initiate maybe 99% and do all the flirting and touching.

After a while, she started rejecting and putting me off as well as never flirting or complimenting me in a sexy way.

I eventually had a serious talk with her and put my foot down but also opened my heart.

She got a tear in her eye, took me upstairs and gave me one of the wildest sessions I had in my life!

We have opened up talking more about sex and everything since then and that was about 8 years ago.

Still going good!


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## BoroBoro (Sep 28, 2017)

Spitfire said:


> My wife initiated maybe 3 times per year. My success rate with initiating was around 20% or so. Since I stopped initiating altogether she'll initiate once per month to have reset sex. It's not very fulfilling so I'm thinking I'll probably start rejecting her.




I’m starting to think about doing the same thing. A person can only be rejected so much before it turns into some major resentment.


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## Clark G (Sep 5, 2012)

We're about 50/50. Our times have gotten less as our kids get older (tougher to stay up later) but we're both very sexual people. I rarely reject her but sometimes (and not often esp if I persist) she'll reject me. Usually just due to exhaustion from life.

Joe


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## 482 (Mar 14, 2017)

Not that often. The more I initiate and run that department the happier I am in the end. Sure I wish she would more but waiting for her to, proved to be way worse than just being the one to do it.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*Actually, I should have voted as a single!

But in my two marriages, both XW and RSXW initiated, give or take, only about 1/4th of the time!*


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## Jimhardc (Oct 16, 2014)

I unfortunately seem to fall into this category as well.


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