# Online counseling



## HopefullySeeking

Has anyone tried online counseling like betterhelp or talkspace for IC and/ or MC? I know expereiences vary but I'm just trying to get a feel for if they're worth the money to try.


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## Laurentium

Apart from things like betterhelp, most counsellors are now offering to see people online. (At least in my area). So you can choose a counsellor and ask them for online sessions, if you wish, without going via betterhelp. 

I am one of those counsellors doing online MC work, and it works well for most couples, as long as they are not too dysregulated. That means, it works well unless they are prone to meltdowns during the session. In the room I could stop that. Online, I become a small face on a screen, and it's harder to interrupt someone who's throwing a tantrum. 

My only problem about betterhelp is they sort of encourage people to switch counsellors "if they're not comfortable". Sometimes counselling has to be hard work, and you need a counsellor who can make you uncomfortable. I don't like how they say you can change counsellors as often as you want -- a person's tendency to do that, and difficulty with sticking at it, might in fact be correlated to what's going wrong in their relationship!


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## HopefullySeeking

Laurentium said:


> Apart from things like betterhelp, most counsellors are now offering to see people online. (At least in my area). So you can choose a counsellor and ask them for online sessions, if you wish, without going via betterhelp.
> 
> I am one of those counsellors doing online MC work, and it works well for most couples, as long as they are not too dysregulated. That means, it works well unless they are prone to meltdowns during the session. In the room I could stop that. Online, I become a small face on a screen, and it's harder to interrupt someone who's throwing a tantrum.
> 
> My only problem about betterhelp is they sort of encourage people to switch counsellors "if they're not comfortable". Sometimes counselling has to be hard work, and you need a counsellor who can make you uncomfortable. I don't like how they say you can change counsellors as often as you want -- a person's tendency to do that, and difficulty with sticking at it, might in fact be correlated to what's going wrong in their relationship!


I guess for me I would rather have individual counseling and go meet them in a park even if it meant crying in front of strangers. I want a place where I feel safe. Not physically but mentally. For example, I had a check up telemed appointment and while I was talking to my Doctor he stayed in the room and began trying to get my attention to suggest that I tell my physician something that he thought I should. If he did that during my individual counseling I think I would flip my lid and we would end up in a huge argument the day after each session. I just can't do it online. And especially not with him around. He just doesn't relent. Like right now, the only reason I can respond to this forum is because he's asleep.


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## Laurentium

HopefullySeeking said:


> I guess for me I would rather have individual counseling and go meet them in a park even if it meant crying in front of strangers. I want a place where I feel safe. Not physically but mentally. For example, I had a check up telemed appointment and while I was talking to my Doctor he stayed in the room and began trying to get my attention to suggest that I tell my physician something that he thought I should. If he did that during my individual counseling I think I would flip my lid and we would end up in a huge argument the day after each session. I just can't do it online. And especially not with him around. He just doesn't relent. Like right now, the only reason I can respond to this forum is because he's asleep.


I'm going to reply to this on your other thread


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