# Wife had an affair



## AVAYA2011 (Jun 24, 2011)

I have been married to my wife for 18 years, when we got married we were 19 and 18, we have two beautiful daughters, we have been through a lot of hard things. When my oldest daughter was 10 years old she got brain cancer. We went through a lot, but together we helped each other during those hard times. My wife has always been very distrustful. At the begining of the year she accused me of liking a coworker that is 18 years younger that me. That was not true, I have never cheated on my wife, We had horrible fights about it, I took a lie detector to show her that I wasn't cheating and I passed it. we also went to marriage therapy but it did not help. I found out months later that while all this was happening, my wife met a coworker and had an affair that lasted for over a two month and which is now over. she had this affair while we were going to marriage therapy, she told me that she had the affair because she though that our marriage was over, she was going to divorce me and this guy was going to help her with the divorce and that he wanted to marry her, at home she had all the necesary things for her and my daughter packed, she was ready to go, she broke off with him after I asked her that we should give ourselfs a second chance, that we could not erase 17 years of marriage and that we could not throw away all that we had achived together as a couple, she agreed. This is the first time that she cheated on me, she told me that they only kissed, huged and talk about their future together because she wanted to get divorced. Last night she implied that they had sex once, when I asked her if she did it she said not, she said that they were really close once when they were at his house but she stoped him, something inside of me makes me think otherwise. At that moment my hearth broke in two, I love her so much and I never thought that she could do this to me, I feel betrayed, I trussted her 100%. she sees this guy everyday when she goes to work, she told him that she wants to work in our marriage, but the guy doesn't give up, my wife avoids him, he then tries to act just like a friend but he can not stop his feeling for her and sometimes tries to convince her to come back with him because he wants to marry her. He makes her confuse, she treats him bad to see if he goes away but he always comes back. My wife told me that she likes him alot physically and emotionaly, she thinks that he is a grea guy, my wife thinks and talks about him alot. she changed alot in just a couple of months, she used to be kind of shy, dedicated wife and mother, now she is wild and all she cares is about looking good, provocative, having fun and going out, when she goes out is with me. What it hurts me the most is that sometimes when we are making love, she fantasizes that she is doing it with him, sometimes I can hear her calling his name. That hurts me deaply, she tells me that she is trying to get him out of her mind and that she is working on it. sometimes she tells me that he is a better man than me, because they get along just find. What should I do? she sees him every day at work, he is going to be out for a month. My wife tells me that he writes to her but that she has never answers to his e-mails, when she sees him she tells him to stop writing to her, to leave her alone. At this moment we can not afford for her to quit her job. I love her with all my strenght and I can feel that she loves me. I need some advice. Thanks


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## Eli-Zor (Nov 14, 2010)

She leaves her job or you lose your marriage, when she leaves the marriage you won't have her money. There is nothing to think about. Next expose the affair to the other man's (OM) family and your wifes parents.

Decide now if you want this marriage, your fear will stop you taking action and will destroy your marriage.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## it-guy (Jan 6, 2011)

She sometimes tells you that he is a better man??? And she calls you his name during sex?

I think we all have a threshhold of pain that we can stand. Yours is higher than mine.
Sounds like she is not done abusing you yet.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## RestlessInGeorgia (Dec 3, 2008)

You say that you can't afford for her to quit her job. The better question is, can your marriage or your own sanity afford her keeping her job?

Bottom line, if she doesn't completely remove this guy from her life, he will always cause problems. Your wife is being very abusive to you with her words and her actions. She doesn't seem to have any remorse or see anything wrong with her actions and she definitely has zero respect for you. She is in what we like to call the "Fog". Until the fog lifts, there's nothing you can do but either put up with her actions or leave her.

Sorry that you're going through this.


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## ahhhmaaaan! (Mar 26, 2011)

"What it hurts me the most is that sometimes when we are making love, she fantasizes that she is doing it with him, sometimes she calls me by his name." Dude... WTF are you still doing there. She's drifting, bro. Either you man-up and give an ultimatum to stop this nonsense, or you pack your thing and go. Act like a man for once.


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## AVAYA2011 (Jun 24, 2011)

I know you are right, sometimes love makes you act so stupid that you can not see the kind of abuse that you are receiving. I have also been puting up with this situation because I have no family in this country that can give me support during this hard times, all I have is my wife and my two teens, so is really tough for me loosing the only family I got because I will be all alone. I also do it because of my kids and for the previous 17 years in which she's been an excellent wife. She is a very attractive woman and there have always been many good looking guys after her but she has always look the other way until now, she was my first and only girlfriend, I have never been with any other woman besides her, that is why is so hard for me, I have been receiving abuse for many months now, but you are right. The guy is going to be leaving today for a month, during this time I am going to try to get her back and I will tell her that she needs to find another job or our marrage is going to be over.
Thanks


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

AVAYA2011 said:


> I have been married to my wife for 18 years, when we got married we were 19 and 18, we have two beautiful daughters, we have been through a lot of hard things. When my oldest daughter was 10 years old she got brain cancer. We went through a lot, but together we helped each other during those hard times. My wife has always been very distrustful. At the begining of the year she accused me of liking a coworker that is 18 years younger that me. That was not true, I have never cheated on my wife, We had horrible fights about it, I took a lie detector to show her that I wasn't cheating and I passed it. we also went to marriage therapy but it did not help. I found out months later that while all this was happening, my wife met a coworker and had an affair that lasted for over a month and which is now over. she had this affair while we were going to marriage therapy. this is the first time that she cheated on me, she told me that they only kissed, huged and talk about their future together because she wanted to get divorced. Last night she told me that they had sex once. At that moment my hearth broke in two, I love her so much and I never thought that she could do this to me, I feel betrayed, I trussted her 100%. she sees this guy everyday when she goes to work, she told him that she wants to work in our marriage, but the guy doesn't give up, he talks to her everyday trying to convince her to come back with him. He makes her confuse, she treats him bad to see if he goes away but he always comes back. My wife told me that she likes him alot and that she thinks that he is the greates guy in the world, she thinks and talks about him alot. she changed alot in just a couple of months, she used to be a shy dedicated wife and mother, now she is wild and all she cares is about looking good, provocative and having fun. What it hurts me the most is that sometimes when we are making love, she fantasizes that she is doing it with him, sometimes she calls me by his name. that hurts me deaply, she tells me that she is trying to get him out of her mind and that she is working on it. sometimes she tells me that he is a better man than me, because they get along just find. What should I do? she sees him every day at work, at this moment we can not afford for her to quit her job. I love her with all my strenght. I need some advice.


If you loved her you would stand up and be a man about it. She must quite her job. Today. Right now. 

That said this would be a dealbreaker for me. I would be moving forward with divorce.


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

AVAYA2011 said:


> I know you are right, sometimes love makes you act so stupid that you can not see the kind of abuse that you are receiving. I have also been puting up with this situation because I have no family in this country that can give me support during this hard times, all I have is my wife and my two teens, so is really tough for me loosing the only family I got because I will be all alone. I also do it because of my kids and for the previous 17 years in which she's been an excellent wife. She is a very attractive woman and there have always been many good looking guys after her but she has always look the other way until now, she was my first and only girlfriend, I have never been with any other woman besides her, that is why is so hard for me, I have been receiving abuse for many months now, but you are right. The guy is going to be leaving today for a month, during this time I am going to try to get her back and I will tell her that she needs to find another job or our marrage is going to be over.
> Thanks


Be aware that women do not find men attractive that they can walk all over. Hence her comment about the other guy being a better man. It sux for sure and hard to hear, but you are being a doormat. That is the last way to keep your wife.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Now is not the time to be weak. Tell her it either stops or you are done.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## AnAvgDude (Jun 20, 2011)

Your situation is very similar to mine about four years ago. I was a doormat too. Now four years later, I am leaving my wife. I will tell you that it takes a LOT of courage. You will be hurt because you still love her, but you cannot continue life being stepped on. Anticipate her telling you that she is sorry and will beg for forgiveness. Don't cave in. Sorry you are going through this.


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## AVAYA2011 (Jun 24, 2011)

My wife told me that when we had these argument and fights, we hurt each other so much that at that time she hated me and that is when this guy showed up and she felt for him. This guy told her that he has always been iterested on her since the first time he saw her 4 years ago but that she never looked back at him . This guy took advantage that she was vulnerable because of the problems that we were going through, he pretended to be her friend and later took her away from me. This guy have many women that are after him because for what I understand he is very good looking, is wealthy and divorced. why did he had to put his eyes in my wife? I know she is at fault too, she should had been faithful to me. My wife told me that at that time she stoped loving me and that this individual entered her hearth. Now what she is trying to do is taking him out of her hearth and trying to put me back in it. she says that she knows that her place is here with me but is that sometimes she can be so hurtful when she compares me with him. I know that I can forgive her but it will take a long long time to forget if i can, that they may had been sexually involved, even if it was only once, that is something that will be hunting me for a long time or maybe for the rest of my life.


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

If you loved me you'd ignore I'm a trifling ho and fight for us since Lord knows I won't.

Chivalry is dead and f*ck that ****
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## morituri (Apr 1, 2011)

You need to man-up big time. Go to the Men's Clubhouse and read as much as you can about maning-up. Start with marduk's excellent thread What I've Learned in the Past Year - A good news story and become a brand NEW MAN.

Good luck.


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## PHTlump (Jun 2, 2010)

I bet your wife started accusing you of an affair because of her affair. Hers didn't start during your marriage counseling. Your marriage counseling started because of her affair.

I'm sorry to hear it, but the others are correct. She doesn't get to have her cake and eat it too. Your marriage has room for 2 people, not 3. Until she chooses you (quits her job, cuts all contact from the other man, and stops abusing you by telling you how wonderful he is) you should kick her out of your house. Tell her she has a limited time to return by choosing you. After a few weeks, you should begin divorce proceedings. A divorce will likely take several months, during which time she can still choose you.

But, if she never does, at least you will be rid of her and ready to move on.

Good luck.


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## AVAYA2011 (Jun 24, 2011)

PHTlump said:


> I bet your wife started accusing you of an affair because of her affair. Hers didn't start during your marriage counseling. Your marriage counseling started because of her affair.
> 
> I'm sorry to hear it, but the others are correct. She doesn't get to have her cake and eat it too. Your marriage has room for 2 people, not 3. Until she chooses you (quits her job, cuts all contact from the other man, and stops abusing you by telling you how wonderful he is) you should kick her out of your house. Tell her she has a limited time to return by choosing you. After a few weeks, you should begin divorce proceedings. A divorce will likely take several months, during which time she can still choose you.
> 
> ...


Her affair started a couple of weeks after she accused me, we had this horrible fights, there were days that we did not sleep at all because we were continously fighting and screaming at each other overnight, one of those days she went crying to her job and that is when the guy pretending that he wanted to help her started washing her brain, telling her that our marriage could not be fix and that it was better for her to move on, he continued until he got what he wanted. You are right, in a marriage there is no room for 3, she will have to decide soon. Thanks


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## CH (May 18, 2010)

AVAYA2011 said:


> she will have to decide soon. Thanks


Ummm, she has to decide now, NOT SOON, NOW.


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

cheatinghubby said:


> Ummm, she has to decide now, NOT SOON, NOW.


:iagree:

If my wife has called out some other man's name when we were making love, that would be an instant GTFO. No questions asked. Just GTFO.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

Thats great that she is working on the "putting you back in her heart".
What will prevent her from going back to her unhealthy behavoirs the next time you too have a problem?

What are the consequences that will prevent her from going back to those unhealthy behavoirs?

What have the both of you learned from this?

It is my opinion that an affair is a by product of a problematic marriage, this really needs to be looked at, its all about prevention if the both of you want to get past this.

Now that you are a member of the cheater police, the thing here is prevention. You may be getting managed by her, what is the game plan to have a healthier marriage?


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

lordmayhem said:


> :iagree:
> 
> If my wife has called out some other man's name when we were making love, that would be an instant GTFO. No questions asked. Just GTFO.


'Really honey? Are you a nun? Are you dating oh god oh god oh god?'

Sort of a joke but I wouldn't hold people in the throes of orgasm 100% responsible for their thought patterns.


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## Initfortheduration (Dec 12, 2008)

You can't afford for her to quit her job, but you can afford her having sex with another guy. Priorities my man, priorities.


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## AVAYA2011 (Jun 24, 2011)

RestlessInGeorgia said:


> You say that you can't afford for her to quit her job. The better question is, can your marriage or your own sanity afford her keeping her job?
> 
> Bottom line, if she doesn't completely remove this guy from her life, he will always cause problems. Your wife is being very abusive to you with her words and her actions. She doesn't seem to have any remorse or see anything wrong with her actions and she definitely has zero respect for you. She is in what we like to call the "Fog". Until the fog lifts, there's nothing you can do but either put up with her actions or leave her.
> 
> Sorry that you're going through this.


You are absolutely right, she is like in a cloud, she does not think that she has done anything wrong, she justifies all her actions by blaming all on me. Even our daughters tell me that she is not the same person that she was a couple of months ago. she is not the same woman I marriage, for anything she just snaps at me. Yesterday she showed the picture of this guy to my oldest daughter and asked her if he was cute or not, then she told him that he was the guy (my daughters know what is goin on), my daughter told her that was wrong, that she shouldn't be doing that or looking at pictures of him. My wife snaped at her telling her that whatever is happening between me and her is not of her business, to stay out of it. she would had never acted like this before. like you said, she is in the "Fog". Thanks


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## Initfortheduration (Dec 12, 2008)

Divorce her. She is hurting your children as well as you.


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## AVAYA2011 (Jun 24, 2011)

My wife told this guy many times that it is over. It has been 3 months since their relationship came to an end. My wife keeps telling him that she has no feeling for him anymore,( I know she still likes him alot because she told me recently that she did) she lies to him because she wants to work in our marriage. When the guy comes back, should I confront him? Telling him to leave my wife alone, that she already told him that she doesn't want anything with him? would this help or make things worst. Once I mention to the wife that I was going to talk to him, she told me no to do that, that she doesn't want me to cause a scene at her work. I am afraid that things could get violent because I feel like he is destroying my life.


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## Eli-Zor (Nov 14, 2010)

Have her hand write him a no contact letter , google for a sample, in the letter she must explicitly state that he must never contact her again . Send it via a method that requires he signs for delivery (certified or recorded mail), if you have his parents details copy them in, keep a copy of the letter for your records. If he contacts her again lay a harassment charge against him.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## AVAYA2011 (Jun 24, 2011)

Eli-Zor said:


> Have her hand write him a no contact letter , google for a sample, in the letter she must explicitly state that he must never contact her again . Send it via a method that requires he signs for delivery (certified or recorded mail), if you have his parents details copy them in, keep a copy of the letter for your records. If he contacts her again lay a harassment charge against him.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


He goes to her place of work because he has some business there, he confessed to her that now he goes more than usual and spends more time there because he wants to see her more often, he sits next to her and stars acting like a friend and then eventually starts to say thing to her so that way she could not forget him completely, he wants to keep her confused. Some of my wife's resposabilities at work had to do with him, so there are a few times in which they need to talk but is work releated.


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## Cypress (May 26, 2011)

Avaya,

Write a short business like letter to her HR department. It should mention the OM by name. It needs to be sent by your wife. 

This should get rid of him quickly.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

Yes, your wife should do the HR thing, and remind her that you have nothing to lose...you have a feeling that you are about to lose everything, so if she doesn't take action then you will, and you are not affraid to go to jail b/c you no longer care what happens to you.

This is just a perception

Giving her this perseption that you will go mad may modivate her to do the right thing.

Contacting the OM is a tough call. If you see that she is still getting involved with him then confront him and everyone else that matters. The goal here is to make it as uncomfortable and as inconvienent for the affair to start up again. 

So keep an eye on her and if the OM is still making efforts to contact your W then open up a can of worms on him.


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

As long as there is ANY contact at all, the A is still ongoing. That's all there is to it. Is this OM married? Then you need to find out who is wife or girlfriend is and expose the A to her. Your wife needs to send this NC letter. Or better yet, your WW needs to quit this job and find another.

You do realize how often people meet up at work and have their sex in a car, or off to a motel for a quickie. Its also common to take some leave from work, pretend to the spouse that they are going to work, then spend the day with their AP. 

Your WW is still deep in the fog of her A, and it shows it. You need to decide if you want to continue sharing her with this OM. You have probably had sloppy seconds on night that you have had sex with her.

Now man up and do the right thing.


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## AVAYA2011 (Jun 24, 2011)

It has been a month since the OM left for a business trip, he still sends e-mails to my wife almost everyday, most of them are work releated but in some he tries to expres his feelings for her in an indirect way because my wife told him in many occasions that she doesn't want to know how he feels for her. My wife ignores the e-mails and never respond to them but he keeps on writing anyway. He also goes every Friday to the office where my wife works for work releated issues but after that he passes by to say hi to my wife and to tell her what he has been doing the whole week. My wife always tells him that she is busy and she is very cold with him to see if he leaves. I told my wife to look for another job but she doesn't want to leave, she said she loves her job. I know it is true because years before knowing the OM, she always told me how happy she was there. she told me that she doesn't love me the way that she used to, that she is not sure if she could ever love me that way again. My wife told me that what she feels for me doesn't have to do anything with the OM, she said that after so many fights her feeling for me got cold and she was very depress. I remember that during those months of fighting she lost 15% of her bodyweight, it was then when she met him and he help her to come out from that depression but at the same time he wanted her for himself. In my opinion he took advantage that she was at her most vulnerable point to make her fall for him. I don't like the fact that everytime I say something bad about him, she defends him and tells me that he is a great guy that helped her alot. Over the weekend she told me that she has feeling for him but that she doesn't love him, she wants to stay with me and that if she sees that our relationship doesn't improve and if the OM doesn't stop that she was going to quit her job. I hope is true. Thing between us are not that great, we don't figh as much but she still fantasizes about him when we are making love. Since he left we don't make love as much as we used to, most of the time that we are together is when she had something to drink, when she doesn't have alcohol in her body and I ask her if we could make love, 90% of the time she tells me that she doesn't want to, that she doesn't feel like it. That makes me worry because that makes me think that she only has the desire of making love when she sees him, I hope I'm wrong. she told me not to pressure her, that she is confused and that she needs time to clear her mind. I am just going to wait to see how thing are going to go, and I will make up my mind too, I know you can't force somebody to love you. All I know is that I love her like crazy and if I lose her, it will be devastating for me. I am just going to keep on fighting for her until there is no hope, she has been the greates wife in the world until now, I can not forget that she is the mother of my girls and all the wonderful times we share together as a family, we had always be there for each other in the good times and in the bad time. She is part of the most beautiful memories that I have of my life. I hope we can make it through.
Thanks to all of you for your comments.


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## Eli-Zor (Nov 14, 2010)

Yet you still do not want to expose this to her work, you are on track for plan Divorce then her job has no value to your family , call HR and provide evidence . The only way the marriage can start to recover is if there is permanent no contact , procastinating and not breaking the affair is a sure fire way to destroy your marriage.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

Almost a month later and you're in the same situation despite the advice given. You need to man up. I'm sure you don't like living in the hell of limbo.


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## jnj express (Mar 28, 2011)

Your wife seems to be trying I think????

You need to get after the other guy----go to court and get a R. O., tell the court he is stalking her, she has told him to leave her alone, and he won't---he is also harrassing her----go see her boss, and tell them that when that guy is in the workplace you want him watched, and kept away from your wife---he doesn't work for her co., and therefore doesn't necessarily have the right to wander around freely.

Short of that you could bring a lawsuit agst. him for INTENTIONAL INFLICTION OF EMOTIONAL DISTRESS, or at least threaten him with a letter to stop harrassing her, or you will file the lawsuit

As long as he keeps himself in front of her she will not forget him, and this won't go away!!!!!


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## BigBri (Jul 22, 2011)

You need to shut this guy out of your reconciliation process- _he's undermining it_. Get a restraining order-_ I can't believe I said that_- to get him to stop communication with her. Personally, I'd beat him to bloody pulp, because he just doesn't seem to get the hint. Get her to do it... this will tell you if she's really serious about it.


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## happyman64 (Jan 12, 2012)

Avaya

You have not posted in a long time but you are lurking. Has your situation at home improved?

HM


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## 6301 (May 11, 2013)

You can tell her to quit her job until the cows come home and she isn't going to do it. You can threaten her with divorce and it won't faze her one bit. You can use every ploy and threat you can dream up and it won't work because she knows you really well and know you will do nothing and take the abuse. 

If my wife ever called out another mans name while were having sex, it would be the last time. Her ass would be gone. Your wife knows you will do nothing and so far you have proved it. 

Now here's another thing. Talk about rubbing your nose in it? She's showing your children pictures of the OM. SHOWING PICTURES OF THE OM TO YOUR KIDS! Mister, if that isn't enough to piss you off by having your kids dragged in to your wife's affair and you sit there with your finger up you ass and do nothing, you not only lost your wife's respect but your on the verge of your kids losing respect for you. Their your kids and your the father. Your job is to protect your children even from their mother when she acts like a tramp in front of them. When she did that you should have opened the front door and punted her ass out in the yard and told her to go with the OM. Maybe you want to be used as a door mat for your wife but to let her use your kids for re assurance and approval for her new boyfriend is unacceptable. Grow a pair of gonads act like a father for your kids. What the hell is the matter with you!


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## BobSimmons (Mar 2, 2013)

Sometimes when we're making love I hear her calling his name....hmmm? Sounds like a cuckold fantasy story, but hope OP gets the help he needs


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## Dyokemm (Apr 24, 2013)

This WW definitely slept with this POS and was gaslighting OP about it. 

She implies it to him, then backpeddles really fast? I don't think so.

She was in the fog bad, defending this scumbag to her BH and calling him a great guy.

What kind of a good man openly seduces an obviously emotionally upset married woman?

This guy is a complete POS in every way.

Its too bad that truly good men can't take a bat upside the head of s**tbags like this.

I hope OP kicked his foolish WW to the curb and exposed this POSOM to her work.


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## Rottdad42 (Nov 26, 2012)

I'm not sure what I'm reading, troll or not. But I will answer your concerns. Man UP!, Steel your spine, show no mercy. Put an end to this crap. First and last, No woman, while making love to me, is going to call out another person name. Not EVER! The second that occurs, you get up out of bed and you walk. Say nothing, clothes on walk out of the house. If that happened to me, I'm not sure of the results. Takes a lot of will power not react to that. A lot of blameshifting and projecting going on as well. This just sounds like an awful mess, that will take some time to figure out. UHG.


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Zombie thread. 

The OP is apparently still lurking after two years of silence.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Is It Just Me (Sep 8, 2012)

AVAYA2011 said:


> Y... Even our daughters tell me that she is not the same person that she was a couple of months ago. ...Yesterday she showed the picture of this guy to my oldest daughter and asked her if he was cute or not, then she told him that he was the guy (my daughters know what is goin on), my daughter told her that was wrong, that she shouldn't be doing that or looking at pictures of him. My wife snaped at her telling her that whatever is happening between me and her is not of her business, to stay out of it.





AVAYA2011 said:


> ... we had this horrible fights, there were days that we did not sleep at all because we were continously fighting and screaming at each other overnight, one of those days she went crying to her job ...




You have mentioned several times that you two argue and fight alot. What are you fighting about? Have you always fought in your relationship at such frequency or is it relatively new?

The fact that you and wife don't care that you're screaming at each other all night long, constantly arguing and fighting with one another, and thereby involving your children in your marital problems, is really bothersome to me. I imagine that it's hard enough for your children to live in a house with their parents frequently at each other's throats, but to add in that they know about an AFFAIR one of you is having is unacceptable. Children look to their parents for normalcy, emotional/physical safety and as a model of what a healthy and functional romantic relationship/partnership is about. They are not there to be a friend to their parent or to take on the (very adult) problem(s) a parent has; if your wife insists on talking about her affair to someone, she needs to find an adult friend and NOT use your teenage daughter in that capacity. Regardless of what's happening between the two of you, maintaining a strong source of adult leadership for your children is something you and wife need to figure out how to do.




AVAYA2011 said:


> My wife told this guy many times that it is over. It has been 3 months since their relationship came to an end. My wife keeps telling him that she has no feeling for him anymore,( I know she still likes him alot because she told me recently that she did) she lies to him because she wants to work in our marriage. .... *I feel like he is destroying my life.*



While this man certainly is no saint in all of this, do not put the blame for the destroying of your life on him. That should be placed solely on your wife's shoulders. She is the one married to you, not him.


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## Is It Just Me (Sep 8, 2012)

bandit.45 said:


> Zombie thread.
> 
> The OP is apparently still lurking after two years of silence.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_




Oh, shoot, I didn't see this thread was 2 years old. I wouldn't have replied.

If not a troll story, I'm curious as to what's happening to the OP.


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## DavidWYoung (Feb 3, 2012)

Get this thru your head. Your wife does NOT love you! I will say it again because you seem to need it. YOUR WIFE DOES NOT LOVE YOU!

There are some other things at you are hiding from.

She does not respect you.
She does not tell you the truth.
She does not care if you live or die.
She does not care if she ever makes love to you again.
She is not the person you married 17 years ago.

The point I am trying to make is, you are a man under attack. Someone is trying to hurt you. You will be hurt for the rest of your life if you don't fight back NOW! Leave this woman, find a new job and a new life. If you keep being her doormat in the future, you will wish that it all would just end, don't be her doormat! LEAVE!


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