# Never a Reason



## Just Wondering (Dec 20, 2011)

Wanted to hear how this is for other males?? It always seems to be once we inter into a sexual dry spell there never is a reason for it. Meaning= Hey love what's going on with us?? Oh nothing is going on. Or this answer I love. She say's She's going thur something, So I ask what are you going thur, What is it maybe I can help ?? And She tells me again , Am going thur something But I don't know what it is. So we get no were. This I don't understand. Is she hiding the truth from me. Or can a female really be having issues about being intimate with her lover and not know where she coming from?? So in the mean time the conversation goes on the back burner.???


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## EllisRedding (Apr 10, 2015)

Kind of sounds like she is blowing you off with her answer, or ... she may feel very uncomfortable talking about sex which is why you get vague responses.

Does she understand that whatever she is going through is in fact having a negative impact on you as well, and that without being able to explain to you what she is going through, it has you questioning whether you are the issue?


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

I would ask if you are an easy person to Open Up to...approachable... a good listener.. showing understanding when she has *any sort of issue*?? This can make a world of difference in effective communication... 

I am guessing she is well aware that you want MORE from her...but she is low drive, not wanting it as much ...maybe she feels there is not much else to say.. if she really laid it out there, what she is REALLY THINKING... it would only start a fight.. and hard feelings...

Possible?... Is there any built up resentment in the marriage (could be over anything)..... how often are you having sex? Does she get hers - meaning orgasming?


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## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

SimplyAmorous said:


> I would ask if you are an easy person to Open Up to...approachable... a good listener.. showing understanding when she has *any sort of issue*?? This can make a world of difference in effective communication...
> 
> I am guessing she is well aware that you want MORE from her...but she is low drive, not wanting it as much ...maybe she feels there is not much else to say.. if she really laid it out there, what she is REALLY THINKING... it would only start a fight.. and hard feelings...



This is very possible. If you've reacted negatively to her concerns/complaints/suggestions in the past - about anything, not just about sex - she may feel there's no sense in saying something that's going to hurt your feelings and start an argument. How well would you respond - honestly - if she said the problem is something to do with you? Imagine if she says that thing you really love to do is a real turn-off, or that she doesn't feel emotionally connected to you and needs that, or she says the sex isn't good for her, or that she's just not attracted to you because of some personal habit or that 20 pounds you've gained? Would you be likely to respond to that positively? Would it start a conversation or a fight?

Also, what was the last thing your wife complained to you about? What did you do about it? If you haven't previously been responsive and made changes that she's requested - again, this isn't limited to sex - in order to better meet her expressed needs, then she may simply not believe there's any point in bringing issues up. Do you know what her top 2-3 emotional needs are, and are you meeting them consistently?


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

Of course there is a reason.

She just isn't telling you.

Finding out why is important.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Are you married to her or just dating? If you are dating, dump her and move on to the next candidate. If you are married, you're toast.


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