# I'm all backed up....need a release



## proudwidaddy (Dec 26, 2011)

God almighty it's been six months since I've been with a woman, and seeing all these beautiful women dressed in their summer outfits are not making it easier. Thank god my divorce is finalized this month. That way if something happened I would be a free man.


----------



## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

yes it is a cruel universe.


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Hope it's over soon and you can move on and find someone very nice and beautiful to date.


----------



## Nsweet (Mar 3, 2012)

Six months is nothing! I've been high and dry for almost 18mo, but you won't find me complaining. I am master of my own domain and don't need sex from women to make myself feel better. The less I think about it, the more I enjoy what a woman has to say and find her intelligence truly sexy.


----------



## proudwidaddy (Dec 26, 2011)

It will be final on June 19th. I'm an attractive guy, funny, nice eyes, great smile....I just don't know how to talk to the ladies
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

bananarama - cruel summer - YouTube


----------



## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

Nsweet said:


> Six months is nothing! I've been high and dry for almost 18mo, but you won't find me complaining. I am master of my own domain and don't need sex from women to make myself feel better. The less I think about it, the more I enjoy what a woman has to say and find her intelligence truly sexy.


a man going his own way, eh?


----------



## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

proudwidaddy said:


> It will be final on June 19th. I'm an attractive guy, funny, nice eyes, great smile....I just don't know how to talk to the ladies
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


don't ask to see their fanny!! :rofl:

on a more serious note, don't stress too much about it proud - obviously I can't speak for ALL women but I don't want endless flattery or platitudes or compliments. I just want you to talk to me like a human being - listen to what I have to say, respond to it, tell me a bit about yourself, share some of my interests

it feels like it's going to be really hard after all this time with one person but women are insecure about talking to guys too

I hope you can find someone you can really open up to - there are some fabulous women out there just waiting for you!!


----------



## proudwidaddy (Dec 26, 2011)

Dolly I wish you lived on this side of the pond, I would love to take you out for coffee
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

see that's all you need to say to someone! Just someone who lives in the same country..... 

you can do it - is there a hot mama at the school? or at the gym? or at work?

what's the worst that could happen? someone might say no - well so what, their loss right?


----------



## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

Proud,

The women that you notice paying attention to you are the ones most likely to say "yes"

I know these things are difficult for Brewers' fans.


----------



## proudwidaddy (Dec 26, 2011)

Wow againwith the Brewera dig
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Nsweet (Mar 3, 2012)

Women are just as insecure as men and most of the time too shy to make the first move. You'll see them stare at you and look away, then look back expecting you to come over and talk. It doesn't take much to open a conversation with an attractive woman and keep it going, you just have to focus on what she has to say and not her chest. 

Look her in the eyes! Be the first man that day to look her in the eyes and not make a sexual pass. And don't tell her how beautiful you think she is or crap like that (not at first!).... She'll use that as an ego boost and write you off as yet another chaser. 

You can tell her how you like her style of clothing or notice how she changed her hair, she's lost weight and looks amazing, but use your words to qualify her when she really needs to hear them and not when you want her validation in return.

If you can keep her interest for 3-5 minutes and keep her excited because of you character, everything that you can offer to enrich her meeting you (everything you did after D to change yourself), then you'll not only make a new friend but she'll find you more attractive. Humor and intelligence are a big turn on for women too, just don't get carried away with it and get too ****y, turn into a clown, or make her feel stupid.

Before the conversation dies down and the climax has reached it's peak try setting up another meeting where you can both pick things back up. If you know you'll see her again at the gym, online, or where she works then you don't have to get a number or make future plans and can develop more comfort with her. 

If that's not the case then try to get her at the peak of excitement (rule of 3!) and then make your excuse to leave. Reassure her that you're not going to chase her all day (because she's got a life too) and then come back with a proposal for another time "Hey, I've go to go..... but let's do this again sometime". Never ask her or you'll hear NO or an excuse.

If you want her number it's as simple as keeping her entertained and handing her your cell phone to type it in for you, or you could write you number down on a scrap receipt and tear it in half keeping your number until she's willing to trade you for hers. After that give her a text message with a witty joke, comment, or question about something she said that was important to her.... You can never go wrong because you were listening.

From that point on follow the 180 and don't chase her. You don't have to text her later that day or the next day, but do realize that each new conversation is like starting over and you're going to have to build a lot of comfort while keeping her attracted (because you have those qualities she's looking for in a husband). Some women won't pick up the phone to call you until they feel comfortable enough and you better believe it takes a lot of comfort to meet you one on one with your the dreaded "tagalong friend". 

This should cover all the beginning bases for you. I purposely left out kino for a reason because I don't want to confuse you or screw up your chances. There's a lot more to it but this is good for now.


----------



## canguy66 (Dec 18, 2011)

Nsweet said:


> Six months is nothing! I've been high and dry for almost 18mo, but you won't find me complaining. *I am master of my own domain *and don't need sex from women to make myself feel better. The less I think about it, the more I enjoy what a woman has to say and find her intelligence truly sexy.


So I take it you're out of the contest?


----------



## Nsweet (Mar 3, 2012)

I am out! I'm out Jerry, I have pleasured myself


----------



## canguy66 (Dec 18, 2011)

Some guys know how to take matters into their own hands.


----------



## Nsweet (Mar 3, 2012)

Hands.... No, not often. Two fleshlights, I train the way I f*ck.


----------



## canguy66 (Dec 18, 2011)

Nsweet said:


> Hands.... No, not often. Two fleshlights, I train the way I f*ck.


Oh man... loved this.


----------



## jpr (Dec 14, 2011)

Nsweet said:


> Hands.... No, not often. Two fleshlights, I train the way I f*ck.


Oh my!


----------



## canguy66 (Dec 18, 2011)

I used to have a Fleshlight.


----------



## SoVeryLost (May 14, 2012)

Why the need for two...?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## canguy66 (Dec 18, 2011)

I can't answer for him, but I can say they have different sleeves for tightness, texture, even colours. So... variety? 

I should have been a sex therapist.


----------



## SoVeryLost (May 14, 2012)

Hmmm. I suppose. But how do you choose? Eenie, meenie, minie mo...which one will feel like a ho...

Haha. Just kidding. 

I actually had to Google them...was not familiar, but then, I am a chick. 

Good for you guys either way!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Traggy (Jan 26, 2012)

It is a proven fact that cardinal fans are better at picking up women than brewer fans. I would definitely start there.


----------



## proudwidaddy (Dec 26, 2011)

Wow....all the hate towards Brewers fans....I bet SoVeryLost and all the other lovely ladies would be happy with THIS Brewer fan


----------



## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

proudwidaddy said:


> Wow....all the hate towards Brewers fans....I bet SoVeryLost and all the other lovely ladies would be happy with THIS Brewer fan


You're claiming to be an exception to the other cheeseheads up there?


----------



## Nsweet (Mar 3, 2012)

SoVeryLost said:


> Why the need for two...?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


One for vaginal, one for anal.


----------



## SoVeryLost (May 14, 2012)

proudwidaddy said:


> Wow....all the hate towards Brewers fans....I bet SoVeryLost and all the other lovely ladies would be happy with THIS Brewer fan


I border both Wisconsin and Missouri.....decisions.... 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## SoVeryLost (May 14, 2012)

Nsweet said:


> One for vaginal, one for anal.


Oooooooh. I see. It's good to have options!

And hey...it's not like either one will ever tell you no. 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## canguy66 (Dec 18, 2011)

Nsweet said:


> One for vaginal, one for anal.


_"Insert" witty comment here._


----------



## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

SoVeryLost said:


> I border both Wisconsin and Missouri.....decisions....
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


And here I figured you were out west somewhere - not next door.


----------



## SoVeryLost (May 14, 2012)

Really? That's interesting. I wonder why?

But nope...born, raised, and cornfed here in lovely Iowa. 

Next door to me could be a number of places, but hey neighbor. 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

SoVeryLost said:


> I border both Wisconsin and Missouri.....decisions....
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Go Cubs Go!


----------



## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

canguy66 said:


> I used to have a Fleshlight.


I was on the verge of ordering one last night...

so gd lonely  lol


----------



## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)




----------



## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

samyeagar said:


> Go Cubs Go!


And to think I was initially inclined to support you.


----------



## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

West Central Illinois...either Cubs or Cards, and well fortunately for me, I picked the good guys! My oldest son and I have had some really good laughs at them this year though. Something to be said for loyalty though...


----------



## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

samyeagar said:


> West Central Illinois...either Cubs or Cards, and well fortunately for me, I picked the good guys! My oldest son and I have had some really good laughs at them this year though. Something to be said for loyalty though...


If you think about it, 1908 isn't really all that long ago.


----------



## SoVeryLost (May 14, 2012)

Lon said:


> I was on the verge of ordering one last night...
> 
> so gd lonely  lol


I don't think it talks to you, snuggles with you, gives you a backrub, runs it's fingers through your hair, or shares it's hopes and dreams with you. It's a bit more rudimentary than that. 

Course...I don't know...maybe there's a deluxe model I don't know about?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

SoVeryLost said:


> *I don't think it talks to you, snuggles with you, gives you a backrub, runs it's fingers through your hair, or shares it's hopes and dreams with you*. It's a bit more rudimentary than that.
> 
> Course...I don't know...maybe there's a deluxe model I don't know about?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


You just summed up half of what I am looking for right there.


----------



## SoVeryLost (May 14, 2012)

samyeagar said:


> You just summed up half of what I am looking for right there.


Join the club.  

Wait...I guess you did! That's why we're here. 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## proudwidaddy (Dec 26, 2011)

Soverylost,
God I miss snuggling, and running my fingers through her hair, rubbing her back, having her run her fingers up and down my chest, AGH!!!!


----------



## SoVeryLost (May 14, 2012)

proudwidaddy said:


> Soverylost,
> God I miss snuggling, and running my fingers through her hair, rubbing her back, having her run her fingers up and down my chest, AGH!!!!


We all miss that...that's the good stuff. The times when there are no words because words simply aren't necessary...when what needs to be said is spoken through touch and touch alone. When you can literally feel the heat and passion between your two bodies...

Fml...now I need a fleshlight...


----------



## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

proudwidaddy said:


> Soverylost,
> God I miss snuggling, and running my fingers through her hair, rubbing her back, having her run her fingers up and down my chest, AGH!!!!


Just stop right now...running my fingers over the small of her back... *sigh*


----------



## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

I don't think this thread is helping alleviate P&W, lol.


----------



## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

proudwidaddy said:


> Wow....all the hate towards Brewers fans....I bet SoVeryLost and all the other lovely ladies would be happy with THIS Brewer fan


If SVL is a Vikings fan, chances are she's also a Twins fan, so therefore, NOT a Brewers fan.

ETA: Ooops -- thought you were in MN since you mentioned the Vikes.


----------



## SoVeryLost (May 14, 2012)

angelpixie said:


> If SVL is a Vikings fan, chances are she's also a Twins fan, so therefore, NOT a Brewers fan.


See? The women get it. 

No lie...I have a Kirby Puckett plaque in my home office.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## SoVeryLost (May 14, 2012)

angelpixie - all of my family is from Minnesota. So yes, I'm a fan of anything stemming out of Minnesota by default. That and the fact that Iowa has no major league anything...
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Traggy (Jan 26, 2012)

I miss the pillow talk afterwards. That was grand. Just laying there talking about the craziest crap coming down from the orgasmic high. 

Those are my favorite times with a woman. They are one of those moments in time, where the world makes perfect sense, and you really understood what love truly is. 

Well, I thought I did!


----------



## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

So guys...I had lunch with someone last week. I'd like to see him again, even though it may only ever turn out to be a friend thing and nothing more. We had fun talking & stuff and left things with him asking if I'd like to go with him for sushi some time. I told him I'd like to and that I'd get in touch when I was free. With my custody schedule, I'm only free every other week. So, it's this week or I have to wait 2 more. He hasn't contacted me since lunch. Do I take that as him not being interested, or leaving the ball in my court? He asked the first time.

I'm really chicken to call him, but if I don't today, I think I've lost my chance for Wednesday night. Last week, I was all confident and 'He11 yeah!' but now I'm really chicken sh!t. Help!!


----------



## Traggy (Jan 26, 2012)

You put the ball in your court by taking the play away from him by saying 

"I will get in touch with you"

He will not call, because he will think that he is being needy because you said you would contact him. 

Call him already.


----------



## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

angelpixie said:


> So guys...I had lunch with someone last week. I'd like to see him again, even though it may only ever turn out to be a friend thing and nothing more. We had fun talking & stuff and left things with him asking if I'd like to go with him for sushi some time. I told him I'd like to and that I'd get in touch when I was free. With my custody schedule, I'm only free every other week. So, it's this week or I have to wait 2 more. He hasn't contacted me since lunch. Do I take that as him not being interested, or leaving the ball in my court? He asked the first time.
> 
> I'm really chicken to call him, but if I don't today, I think I've lost my chance for Wednesday night. Last week, I was all confident and 'He11 yeah!' but now I'm really chicken sh!t. Help!!


Call him, and make it seem like it is your idea to go out this time, and no so much in response to him not calling. Are you interested in him, or interested in the fact that he seemed interested in you?


----------



## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

do it angel - carpe diem darling!!!


----------



## In_The_Wind (Feb 17, 2012)

angelpixie said:


> So guys...I had lunch with someone last week. I'd like to see him again, even though it may only ever turn out to be a friend thing and nothing more. We had fun talking & stuff and left things with him asking if I'd like to go with him for sushi some time. I told him I'd like to and that I'd get in touch when I was free. With my custody schedule, I'm only free every other week. So, it's this week or I have to wait 2 more. He hasn't contacted me since lunch. Do I take that as him not being interested, or leaving the ball in my court? He asked the first time.
> 
> I'm really chicken to call him, but if I don't today, I think I've lost my chance for Wednesday night. Last week, I was all confident and 'He11 yeah!' but now I'm really chicken sh!t. Help!!


Yes I agree with others call him already woohoo


----------



## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

samyeagar said:


> Call him, and make it seem like it is your idea to go out this time, and no so much in response to him not calling. Are you interested in him, or interested in the fact that he seemed interested in you?


No, it's not because he was interested in me. I really enjoyed his company. He's very funny and has a nice personality. (OK, he has a beautiful smile and he's pretty athletic, too, but we didn't really flirt or anything, so I'm kind of disregarding that aspect)


----------



## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

angelpixie said:


> No, it's not because he was interested in me. I really enjoyed his company. He's very funny and has a nice personality. (OK, he has a beautiful smile and he's pretty athletic, too, but we didn't really flirt or anything, so I'm kind of disregarding that aspect)


If you were disregarding that aspect, you would not have brought it up  No need to disregard it either, if you thought he was attractive, nothing wrong with that...at all.

You know, that is one thing so many of us have been conditioned on...if we say that part of the reason we like someone is because we think they are hot, or we comment on physical appearences, we are called shallow, but you know, we need to get past that...you want to go out with someone because you think they are hot? Go fo it! Most of us are like that anyway, but very few will ever admit it.


----------



## jpr (Dec 14, 2011)

angelpixie said:


> So guys...I had lunch with someone last week. I'd like to see him again, even though it may only ever turn out to be a friend thing and nothing more. We had fun talking & stuff and left things with him asking if I'd like to go with him for sushi some time. I told him I'd like to and that I'd get in touch when I was free. With my custody schedule, I'm only free every other week. So, it's this week or I have to wait 2 more. He hasn't contacted me since lunch. Do I take that as him not being interested, or leaving the ball in my court? He asked the first time.
> 
> I'm really chicken to call him, but if I don't today, I think I've lost my chance for Wednesday night. Last week, I was all confident and 'He11 yeah!' but now I'm really chicken sh!t. Help!!


Call him, Angel!...do it. 

Don't wait. _He_ will think that _you're_ not interested in *him.*

What the heck?! do it.

:smthumbup:


----------



## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

All right. Phone call has been made. I had to leave a message for him to call me. That's probably a bad thing, but I know he works really crazy shifts at the hospital. I was really nervous, but maybe that just made me sound all breathless & sexy. Yeah, right.  :rofl:


----------



## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

angelpixie said:


> All right. Phone call has been made. I had to leave a message for him to call me. That's probably a bad thing, but I know he works really crazy shifts at the hospital. I was really nervous, but maybe that just made me sound all breathless & sexy. Yeah, right.  :rofl:


Good job! Now you can tell me how to get up the nerve 

...and breathless and sexy is good...yeah...good.


----------



## proudwidaddy (Dec 26, 2011)

For all you TAM ladies my birthday is Friday, bring the caravan up to WIto visit me
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

What's the weather like out there? Do I pack sweaters or a swimsuit?


----------



## SoVeryLost (May 14, 2012)

angelpixie said:


> What's the weather like out there? Do I pack sweaters or a swimsuit?


Friday is supposed to be in the 80s around here I believe. Make it a two-piece for the birthday boy. 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

hey Proud, perhaps I'll skip on over to (where the hell am I coming again) and give your birthday a bit of British flavour oi oi


----------



## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

proudwidaddy said:


> For all you TAM ladies my birthday is Friday, bring the caravan up to WIto visit me
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I'll send the midget.


----------



## Nsweet (Mar 3, 2012)

proudwidaddy said:


> For all you TAM ladies my birthday is Friday, bring the caravan up to WIto visit me
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


That will be $50 per woman and it gets you two dances from each. $100 if you want to touch them but no funny business or Big Larry over here will wring your neck.


----------



## [email protected] (Dec 18, 2011)

SoVeryLost said:


> We all miss that...that's the good stuff. The times when there are no words because words simply aren't necessary...when what needs to be said is spoken through touch and touch alone. When you can literally feel the heat and passion between your two bodies...
> 
> Fml...now I need a fleshlight...


That's funny Proud, that's what I yearned for during my marriage.. My STBX-AHOLE would brush me off like an irritation. All I wanted was affection.. Good god he's more of a jerk than I thought... He was my first you see.. I had (have) nothing to compare him to! I assumed most men were cold & unable to show physical affection. Am I really that wrong?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

I don't know whether it's worse to have never had it or to be with someone who used to be incredibly loving and affectionate only to withdraw it completely when they check out

the contrast was startling - and incredibly upsetting to me

should you have to ask your husband for a kiss when he gets home from work when he used to walk through the door and immediately grab you for a proper snog?

*sigh*


----------



## Traggy (Jan 26, 2012)

Dollystanford said:


> I don't know whether it's worse to have never had it or to be with someone who used to be incredibly loving and affectionate only to withdraw it completely when they check out
> 
> the contrast was startling - and incredibly upsetting to me
> 
> ...


Great feeling huh. I think I would have been better to do without that.


----------



## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

[email protected] said:


> That's funny Proud, that's what I yearned for during my marriage.. My STBX-AHOLE would brush me off like an irritation. All I wanted was affection.. Good god he's more of a jerk than I thought... He was my first you see.. I had (have) nothing to compare him to! I assumed most men were cold & unable to show physical affection. Am I really that wrong?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


They will, but they need to feel free to do it.


----------



## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

Dollystanford said:


> I don't know whether it's worse to have never had it or to be with someone who used to be incredibly loving and affectionate only to withdraw it completely when they check out
> 
> the contrast was startling - and incredibly upsetting to me
> 
> ...


I can't remember when exactly she started avoiding me when I came through the door after a long day - since the beginning that was the first thing I'd do when I got home, gave her a squeeze and a kiss - sure those kisses got less electric sometimes, maybe she started avoiding my cause she thought I was needy? who knows.


----------



## unsure78 (Oct 17, 2011)

Hey Lon how come you avatars are always pics of food?


----------



## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

unsure78 said:


> Hey Lon how come you avatars are always pics of food?


Food is a sexual experience?

or

Sex is a culinary experience?


----------



## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

angelpixie said:


> Food is a sexual experience?
> 
> or
> 
> Sex is a culinary experience?


Depends on what part of the woman's body you eat the food off of.


----------



## canguy66 (Dec 18, 2011)

angelpixie said:


> Food is a sexual experience?
> 
> or
> 
> Sex is a culinary experience?


Both can be, yes.

You now... sex is also good for learning new languages, which I state being a rather cunning linguist.


----------



## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

canguy66 said:


> Both can be, yes.
> 
> You now... sex is also good for learning new languages, which I state being a rather cunning linguist.


Zing!


----------



## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

canguy66 said:


> Both can be, yes.
> 
> You now... sex is also good for learning new languages, which I state being a rather cunning linguist.


Nothing like an afternoon snack to hold them over until desert...


----------



## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

unsure78 said:


> Hey Lon how come you avatars are always pics of food?


good question... never put much thought into it, though of the 4 avatars I've used here only 2 were food related (the napolean ice cream one because of the ice cream sex poll, and this one because of the talk of coating my maple syrup all over some bacon strips).


----------



## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

so actually all your avatars have been about sex (yes I'm including Quagmire and the Porsche in that)


----------



## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

Dollystanford said:


> so actually all your avatars have been about sex (yes I'm including Quagmire and the Porsche in that)


the Carrerra GT wasn't about sex, it was actually a temporary distraction to keep my mind off of sex. But then the ice cream thread came up and its all I can think of! (sex, not ice cream, though sometimes both simultaneously).


----------



## Nsweet (Mar 3, 2012)

You shouldn't be thinking about *sex*, *sex* isn't everything you know. I know you must be thinking about hot steamy *sex* right now.... Stop it! Stop thinking about having *sex*. *Sex* is all in your mind and you have a dirty mind for thinking about *sex*. *Sexy sexy sex* is not everything. Now stop thinking about *sex*.


----------



## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

LOL, Nsweet! :rofl:


----------



## proudwidaddy (Dec 26, 2011)

Good God glad I'm not thinking about SEX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## unsure78 (Oct 17, 2011)

NSweet you are making me kinda hot! All This talk of SEX


----------



## proudwidaddy (Dec 26, 2011)

Unsure.....SEX, Sex, Sex.....with a little bit of SEX on the side


----------



## [email protected] (Dec 18, 2011)

SEX 

there... said it.. oh crap now I'm thinking about it


----------



## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

ok, my crater is cracking and the lava is about to shoot sky high!!!!


----------



## Nsweet (Mar 3, 2012)

Now, now, there's no need to gasp whenever someone mentions sex. You can breath deeply knowing that all the warm fuzzy feelings you get down there are just a sensual illusion. With every breath try to relax and take your mind off of sex. You may feel a tingle and get all hot and bothered, which is fun, but I'm sure you have more important to get your hands on. While touching yourself may fell good you're naughty for even thinking about it. Try to stop and enjoy yourself and stop thinking about sex.

Bwahahaha!


----------



## [email protected] (Dec 18, 2011)

Nsweet said:


> Now, now, there's no need to gasp whenever someone mentions sex. You can breath deeply knowing that all the warm fuzzy feelings you get down there are just a sensual illusion. With every breath try to relax and take your mind off of sex. You may feel a tingle and get all hot and bothered, which is fun, but I'm sure you have more important to get your hands on. While touching yourself may fell good you're naughty for even thinking about it. Try to stop and enjoy yourself and stop thinking about sex.
> 
> Bwahahaha!


Hairy palms...


----------



## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

Thank god my stbxw has insisted we keep sleeping together...for now...sometimes, I can hardly look at her, other times...holy sh!t is she hot!


----------



## Nsweet (Mar 3, 2012)

Do you hear that? What is that? Are you all brushing your teeth at once? Oh no wait, it's the sound of battery operated boyfriends turning on in tandem. Bzzzzzzz, Bzzzzz, Bzzzzzz! It's like an orchestra warming up.

Is that a Hitachi? BDDDDDDDDDDDD!


----------



## canguy66 (Dec 18, 2011)

I have something to share. I have another job... I roadtest and evaluate Pontiac Vibe automobiles.

I suppose that makes be a Vibe rater.


----------



## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

Nsweet said:


> Do you hear that? What is that? Are you all brushing your teeth at once? Oh no wait, it's the sound of battery operated boyfriends turning on in tandem. Bzzzzzzz, Bzzzzz, Bzzzzzz! It's like an orchestra warming up.
> 
> Is that a Hitachi? BDDDDDDDDDDDD!


^^^That made me laugh out loud.


----------



## unsure78 (Oct 17, 2011)

Nsweet said:


> Now, now, there's no need to gasp whenever someone mentions sex. You can breath deeply knowing that all the warm fuzzy feelings you get down there are just a sensual illusion. With every breath try to relax and take your mind off of sex. You may feel a tingle and get all hot and bothered, which is fun, but I'm sure you have more important to get your hands on. While touching yourself may fell good you're naughty for even thinking about it. Try to stop and enjoy yourself and stop thinking about sex.
> 
> Bwahahaha!


Nsweet you are so naughty!


----------



## Nsweet (Mar 3, 2012)

Naughty? I prefer to think of myself as skilled in Jedi mind tricks

Should I start a phone sex tips thread?


----------



## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Dollystanford said:


> ok, my crater is cracking and the lava is about to shoot sky high!!!!


Cool! I'll grab my asbestos surfboard and ride the wave in!


----------



## unsure78 (Oct 17, 2011)

Nsweet said:


> Naughty? I prefer to think of myself as skilled in Jedi mind tricks
> 
> Should I start a phone sex tips thread?


Whatever NSweet you can talk dirty to me anytime!


----------



## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

bandit.45 said:


> Cool! I'll grab my asbestos surfboard and ride the wave in!


awesome - you're in for a bumpy ride!


----------



## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

Well, something clicked tonight with me. My stbxw texted and wanted me to come over. She wanted to get laid. I briefly thought about saying no, but then I thought of everybody on this thread and decided to take one for the team, and bang the hell out of her 

After we were done, three big things happened. First, I didn't really have any of those feelings wanting to snuggle or any of those things I always had before, and had no problems just getting dressed and getting ready to head out. A few times ago she very matter of factly told me that she wanted to make sure there was no emotional attachment from me and that it was just purely physical, or she would have to stop because she didn't want to lead me on, or me getting the wrong idea, so I have become pretty unattached. 

Tonight, she told me that she was concerned that she was getting in over her head, and that before we are doing it, and while we are doing it, she has no problems with it, and wasnt it, but then after we are done, she feels bad about it and tells herself that it should be the last time, and then she just turns around and does it again.

Finally, I think the most teling thing that happened was whenI was getting ready to leave, she asked if I could pick up some coffee, creamer, and cereal for her in the morning on my way to work, and that if I had time, would I start a pot of coffee for her. So does this fit into the whole nice guy thing? I agreed to do it because right now, I am still thinking about reconcilliation, but I am fully aware that she is playing at being seperated, but wanting the benefits of having a husband.


----------



## Nsweet (Mar 3, 2012)

Depends, is getting her a few groceries before work a big sacrifice for you? 

I believe this as a little test to see if you still care about her since she seems to be on the fence about having romantic feeling for you again. So long as you don't request any validation or reward for this but seem to do it because you care, you won't come off as weak. Think of it like picking up a few groceries for a sister and just drop them off without chasing her for affection.

And who is she kidding? Women can't do no strings attached sexual relationship for long without getting attached. For women sex is a big act of investment and allowing a woman to feel comforted in showing her vulnerabilities to you. That kind of trust takes a lot for her to give and eventually she'll crave more comfort from you.


----------



## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

Nsweet said:


> Depends, is getting her a few groceries before work a big sacrifice for you?
> 
> I believe this as a little test to see if you still care about her since she seems to be on the fence about having romantic feeling for you again. So long as you don't request any validation or reward for this but seem to do it because you care, you won't come off as weak. Think of it like picking up a few groceries for a sister and just drop them off without chasing her for affection.
> 
> And who is she kidding? Women can't do no strings attached sexual relationship for long without getting attached. For women sex is a big act of investment and allowing a woman to feel comforted in showing her vulnerabilities to you. That kind of trust takes a lot for her to give and eventually she'll crave more comfort from you.


That is one of the main reasons I have continued to sleep with her, well, that and the obvious one...the fact that it keeps a major line of communication open, and that she may vey well have a hard time keeping things seperate.

And yeah, I am going to get the groceries. It is something I would normally do anyway, and of corse it is no strings attached, I just found it interesting that when I have helped with other things,she has made a point to tell me how she didn't need me to do it and that she is capable, but yet can turn around and ask for a favor...ahh well


----------



## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

Hmmm...interesting...brought the groceries over, started the coffee, went upstairs to let her know, oh and I put gas in her Pacifica as well, and she was awake reading. I sat down beside her and she reached out and we held hands. Not sure if it was conscious or not on her part, and then well, umm...morning sex is really good.


----------



## unsure78 (Oct 17, 2011)

samyeagar said:


> Hmmm...interesting...brought the groceries over, started the coffee, went upstairs to let her know, oh and I put gas in her Pacifica as well, and she was awake reading. I sat down beside her and she reached out and we held hands. Not sure if it was conscious or not on her part, and then well, umm...morning sex is really good.


Jealous I want morning sex...


----------



## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

unsure78 said:


> Jealous I want morning sex...


the best kind, huh? *sigh*


----------



## proudwidaddy (Dec 26, 2011)

I'll take anykind of sex right now, doesn't have to be morning sex. Heck even if a woman's hand accidentally brushed past my privates, that would count right now


----------



## I want the kids! (Apr 17, 2012)

I just thought of that Saturday Night Live skit "jiz in my pants" HAHAHA


----------



## unsure78 (Oct 17, 2011)

HA HA Proud now i have a pic of that in my head....


----------



## Traggy (Jan 26, 2012)

samyeagar said:


> That is one of the main reasons I have continued to sleep with her, well, that and the obvious one...the fact that it keeps a major line of communication open, and that she may vey well have a hard time keeping things seperate.
> 
> And yeah, I am going to get the groceries. It is something I would normally do anyway, and of corse it is no strings attached, I just found it interesting that when I have helped with other things,she has made a point to tell me how she didn't need me to do it and that she is capable, but yet can turn around and ask for a favor...ahh well



This is dead wrong. Women can have no strings attached sex especially if they are looking to get out of the relationship. Women generally do not feel "love" like men do from sex. When a man has sex he thinks everything is fine in the relationship. Women, feel love, generally, after the sexual encounter with the cuddling and talking along with the intimate interactions throughout the day.

Don't expect just because she is having sex that she is growing an attachment to you because you are probably thinking that it is bringing you closer together. 

Ask Proud and countless other men here how this type of thinking worked out in the end.

Women are VERY capable of having no strings attached sex with their husbands even days before they leave them for good. Maybe to alleviate guilt, maybe for just simple pleasure, and maybe to give you a chance to look outside the bedroom for improvements elsewhere, but do not think for a second that this sexual act is fixing anything.


----------



## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

Traggy said:


> This is dead wrong. Women can have no strings attached sex especially if they are looking to get out of the relationship. Women generally do not feel "love" like men do from sex. When a man has sex he thinks everything is fine in the relationship. Women, feel love, generally, after the sexual encounter with the cuddling and talking along with the intimate interactions throughout the day.


They give sex to get love.


----------



## Traggy (Jan 26, 2012)

Conrad said:


> They give sex to get love.


Exactly


----------



## Andy968 (Apr 29, 2012)

Traggy said:


> Women are VERY capable of having no strings attached sex with their husbands even days before they leave them for good. Maybe to alleviate guilt, maybe for just simple pleasure, and maybe to give you a chance to look outside the bedroom for improvements elsewhere, but do not think for a second that this sexual act is fixing anything.


I have to agree here. A month before my marriage blew apart, my wife wanted sex every night, purchased sexy lingerie, always very willing, yeah for me! Since then I've been cut off for 22 months... except for once in mid-2011, but that doesn't count. I guarantee she had no feelings for me then, just as she doesn't now. Sex then was simply a pleasure or a fantasy with someone else.


----------



## proudwidaddy (Dec 26, 2011)

Andy,
Same thing for me as well! Last three months, sex all the time, purchased nice outfit, had a couple of nooners, thought things were getting better. Nope, she was just practicing to get herself ready for single life.


----------



## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

Wait -- men feel love from sex??

I'm serious, I always thought it was easy for a man to detach.

As a woman, how would I know whether a man feels love or not? My husband told me he loved me during sex a week before he left me, so I don't have a clue anymore.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

I also want to add that women DO feel love from sex...there is an oxytocin release that bonds us to a man. THAT is why a woman becomes attached to you when you sleep with her. Cuddling and pillow talk are equally rewarding for both sexes. It's scientifically proven, look it up.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

I think both sexes are able to have no strings attached sex when they have emotionally checked out of a marriage. It is by no means only women, men do it too. It sucks for the dumpee either way.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

MyselfAgain said:


> Wait -- men feel love from sex??
> 
> I'm serious, I always thought it was easy for a man to detach.
> 
> ...


Men can do it without loving their partner. And, it's relatively easy for them to do this.

HOWEVER, in an LTR, if a man isn't getting regular sex, he's on the road to concluding his wife doesn't really love him.


----------



## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

Um, I completely disagree then -- women DO feel love from sex the way it was stated above. Please. I wanted to sleep with my stbxh alllll the time but he turned me down due to stress. I absolutely felt unloved. And I am sure it contributed to the end of the marriage.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

MyselfAgain said:


> Um, I completely disagree then -- women DO feel love from sex the way it was stated above. Please. I wanted to sleep with my stbxh alllll the time but he turned me down due to stress. I absolutely felt unloved. And I am sure it contributed to the end of the marriage.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Are you in counseling?

If you are, how's it going?


----------



## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

Yes, and I think it is going great. No contact with stbxh for 2 months, and I have been keeping myself very busy and happy with friends, yoga, losing weight, community involvement, and exciting work opportunities. People say I seem much happier and healthier, and I feel like I have come out of a stressful fog that was the last year of my marriage. Why do you ask?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Traggy (Jan 26, 2012)

MyselfAgain said:


> I also want to add that women DO feel love from sex...there is an oxytocin release that bonds us to a man. THAT is why a woman becomes attached to you when you sleep with her. Cuddling and pillow talk are equally rewarding for both sexes. It's scientifically proven, look it up.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


That is released after sex is finished for the woman I do believe, after the orgasm. It is what makes women bond to the male. (Fall in love)


----------



## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

Traggy said:


> That is released after sex is finished for the woman I do believe, after the orgasm. It is what makes women bond to the male. (Fall in love)


The decision to provide sex is to get love.

Our options are so much more limited than theirs.

It's likely why they often fail to understand the value we place on it.


----------



## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

I have never once had an orgasm with a man. Not once. I have bonded and fallen in love after sex, so if you can figure that out, go for it!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## proudwidaddy (Dec 26, 2011)

I just have to vent, the last three months of my marriage when my ex wife and I had sex, to me it was always making love, even if it was a drunken fit of sex. I ALWAYS had feelings for her. Even a week after she said she wanted a divorce, and we had sex there was still always a connection for me.

I'm not the type of person who can just disengage and have sex without feelings. I think that's what bugs me so much, because I've not had sex for six months and my ex has not had to go without. Even when she was checking out of our marriage I was always more than willing and able to make love. So while she was emotionally disconnecting from me, she was using me. 

Then she just moves on to some poor other sucker. This just frustrates me.

There, I feel better.


----------



## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

MyselfAgain said:


> I have never once had an orgasm with a man. Not once. I have bonded and fallen in love after sex, so if you can figure that out, go for it!
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Anyone else feel a challenge with this post?


----------



## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

Proud, I hope I can find a man like you...the sooner, the better! I am exactly the same. I guess the lesson here is that even though we may be taught that men and women are different, some of us really are very much the same when it comes to the sexual experience. This makes me feel hopeful!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

Conrad, honestly, I would love nothing more than for someone to win that challenge! Or even just try! The men I have been with were either just in it for themselves, or like my stbxh, felt it was "too much work" or something. The reality is that it's all about getting me in the right frame of mind to relax and be comfortably vulnerable. Not simple, but not impossible! (Any takers?!)
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

Of course, if you were to make love to me, I would likely love you back...dangerous, huh?!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

I appreciate your sense of humor and your honesty.

In all seriousness, it would feel awesome to be loved back.

I doubt I've ever really allowed it. When you think you have to earn it, it's easy to feel like people love what you can do - rather than the unique individual you actually are.


----------



## proudwidaddy (Dec 26, 2011)

Myself,
I always made sure my ex wife came before I did, because let's face it when a man is done....he is done. (And yes I can tell the difference between when a woman fakes it, I know the feeling of the muscle contracting)


----------



## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

Traggy said:


> This is dead wrong. Women can have no strings attached sex especially if they are looking to get out of the relationship. Women generally do not feel "love" like men do from sex. When a man has sex he thinks everything is fine in the relationship. Women, feel love, generally, after the sexual encounter with the cuddling and talking along with the intimate interactions throughout the day.
> 
> Don't expect just because she is having sex that she is growing an attachment to you because you are probably thinking that it is bringing you closer together.
> 
> ...


Don't think I have not considered this, and I have accepted that it is quite possible. I do not however think it is damaging things any further.

Like I said, it is one more line of communication that is still open for now, a month and a half after we seperated, and every so often, something like this morning, her taking and holding my hand while we were just talking...hard to see that as using me.


----------



## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

Proud, stop it. Stop it right now. You are making me crush on you hard -- I am already sexually frustrated, are you trying to make me implode?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

Sam, if you don't feel used, that's fine, we just would be brokenhearted to see you hurt AGAIN.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

Conrad,

I understand completely. I'm sure I have never felt totally loved either, especially when "made love to". Hence the inability to come, which I can certainly do on my own (repeatedly!)
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## proudwidaddy (Dec 26, 2011)

Sam obviousy if you can work out your situaton then all the best. I will tell you to tread carefully. Many a man has gotten into trouble by thinking with the head south of the boarder
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## I want the kids! (Apr 17, 2012)

MyselfAgain said:


> Conrad, honestly, I would love nothing more than for someone to win that challenge! Or even just try! The men I have been with were either just in it for themselves, or like my stbxh, felt it was "too much work" or something. The reality is that it's all about getting me in the right frame of mind to relax and be comfortably vulnerable. Not simple, but not impossible! (Any takers?!)
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I have only been with my wife so I am not experienced but I find this very sad. When my wife and I got together we would do it for hours and she would have multiple orgasms. I felt it was my duty to give her as many as she could take. I'm sure I can win the challenge but I'm no where ready to date. I'm sure you will find a giving man in time. Maybe masturbate in front of him to show him what it takes.

Sorry if this is too personal.


----------



## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

proudwidaddy said:


> Myself,
> I always made sure my ex wife came before I did, because let's face it when a man is done....he is done. (And yes I can tell the difference between when a woman fakes it, I know the feeling of the muscle contracting)


I understand this succinctly.

The problem, I am suspecting, with us niceguys, is that for me, she came first EVERY time - meaning if she didn't come neither did I, and then I would feel unsatisfied (both sexually and even to my core self-worth - cause that's what niceguys do). Even if we both just enjoyed the quality time with no strong finish, I felt inadequate, and took all the responsibilty on myself. In future relationships I am just going to give and receive pleasure and if feel like coming first sometimes I will, no formula.


----------



## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

Even now with my stbxw, and hour and a half is not uncommon. We just have a lot of fun, though replacing broken furniture can get a bit expensive after a while...


----------



## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

Lon said:


> I understand this succinctly.
> 
> The problem, I am suspecting, with us niceguys, is that for me, she came first EVERY time - meaning if she didn't come neither did I, and then I would feel unsatisfied (both sexually and even to my core self-worth - cause that's what niceguys do). Even if we both just enjoyed the quality time with no strong finish, I felt inadequate, and took all the responsibilty on myself. In future relationships I am just going to give and receive pleasure and if feel like coming first sometimes I will, no formula.


I think it's best to not have rules of who always comes first. I truly don't want to feel like I _have_ to come, or else he's thinking he didn't do something right. If I am exhausted after a busy day at work & with the kiddo, I just might not have it in me. BUT whatever he was doing would still feel reeeeealllly good. But (in my other life) if I didn't come, STBXH wouldn't believe me that I still enjoyed it, and he always tried to have me come first. Finally, when I got really insistent that I knew my body pretty well and I knew how I was feeling, we worked it out that whoever felt like finishing, did. And then, we'd take care of the other person. If he finished first, sometimes that would mean I'd get out Mr. Hitachi & STBXH would just kiss me & touch me. Awesome! I didn't feel like I missed a thing! It's all about truly feeling relaxed and comfortable with the other person. 

Even after we were separated, but were still living together for a few months, we still had sex. And I swear, it was some of the best we'd had. I felt a real connection to him and I _know_ he did with me, too. We had told each other it was just because we enjoyed each other, and maybe it was better because the expectations were gone. It was when he felt he had to deny that connection in order to keep the separation going that it killed me.


----------



## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

I want the kids! said:


> I have only been with my wife so I am not experienced but I find this very sad. When my wife and I got together we would do it for hours and she would have multiple orgasms. I felt it was my duty to give her as many as she could take. I'm sure I can win the challenge but I'm no where ready to date. I'm sure you will find a giving man in time. Maybe masturbate in front of him to show him what it takes.
> 
> Sorry if this is too personal.


My wife is the only woman I have ever been with, but I did date quite a bit before her, messed around a lot, but never slept with any of them, though I had the chance, my choice. I just have to keep reminding myself that I do have a pretty decent tool box to draw from.


----------



## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

Lon said:


> I understand this succinctly.
> 
> The problem, I am suspecting, with us niceguys, is that for me, she came first EVERY time - meaning if she didn't come neither did I, and then I would feel unsatisfied (both sexually and even to my core self-worth - cause that's what niceguys do). Even if we both just enjoyed the quality time with no strong finish, I felt inadequate, and took all the responsibilty on myself. In future relationships I am just going to give and receive pleasure and if feel like coming first sometimes I will, no formula.


Lon,

It's truly a theme.

Thread after thread after thread, I "made sure she did", etc.

I fear it's another symptom of the same disease.

Our love life got white hot when I stopped giving a **** about that and just took her - repeatedly.

A firm tug on the belt when climbing the stairs gets things started. We usually don't even make it to the bed.


----------



## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

Conrad said:


> Lon,
> 
> It's truly a theme.
> 
> ...


Noted. Will have to try that one.

Thinking about the future, and if my stbxw and I do not reconcile, I am not sure how satisfied I would be with someone who was not confident in their own sexuality, and not at least a bit adventurous, not talking about whips, chains and latex necessarily, because that kind of scares me a bit, but someone that wants to branch out of the bedroom missionary.


----------



## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

samyeagar said:


> Noted. Will have to try that one.


Don't forget to pull her hair during.


----------



## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

Conrad said:


> Don't forget to pull her hair during.


Yeah, that seems to do it for her. Rough but not violent. Scrapes, scratches and bruises are not unheard of, or a bad thing...


----------



## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

Dear Proud, my little Gemini buddy

:birthday:​
I hope a lady brushes against your trousers today or at least shows you her legs. In the meantime...










Have a great day!

x


----------



## canguy66 (Dec 18, 2011)

Happy Birthday, Proud! Hope you have a good day - you deserve it! :smthumbup:


----------



## [email protected] (Dec 18, 2011)

Happy Birthday 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## proudwidaddy (Dec 26, 2011)

Dolly that was awesome! Thankyou guys for the birthday wishes
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## unsure78 (Oct 17, 2011)

Happy Birthday Proud!


----------



## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Happy Birthday Proud! Go out tonight and get laid.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## 52flower (Mar 4, 2011)

It's your day...kick back and enjoy! You've been through a lot and deserve a day of fun. Happy Birthday Proud!!


----------



## LovesHerMan (Jul 28, 2011)

Happy Birthday--I'm Proud of you! You have come so far on your journey from your first post.


----------



## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

Have a wonderful birthday, Proud! Find yourself a sweet Wisconsin farmer's daughter and show her a good time!


----------



## UpnDown (May 4, 2012)

angelpixie said:


> Have a wonderful birthday, Proud! Find yourself a sweet Wisconsin farmer's daughter and show her a good time!


Just don't do it in daddys pig barn!! Those farmers have some mean lookin shotguns!


----------



## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

Quiet night...resurrecting this thread in search of smiles to get me through. Anyone around?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## proudwidaddy (Dec 26, 2011)

I'm heading out to move, but ill stop by later
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

How did the move go, Proud? Did you have any help?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## proudwidaddy (Dec 26, 2011)

I moved some little stuff, doing that again today. Then a lot of cleaning. My uncle is coming down Thursday to help with the big stuff.


----------



## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

Oh that's good. Good luck with it, and be sure to do something fun this weekend as well. At the very least, come around for snuggles when you need a break 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## proudwidaddy (Dec 26, 2011)

I work all weekend long, get to spend time with the kids after work tomorrow. You can come over tonight for snuggles, I have the place all to mysel


----------



## MyselfAgain (Apr 21, 2012)

I don't know if I will be available...I only snuggle with guys who return my PMs  Might have to share me....
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## proudwidaddy (Dec 26, 2011)

Check your PM...


----------

