# Another post to vent….



## Ldziesinski (Nov 18, 2021)

I have been no contact with my stbxh since December. He is having / had an affair with his coworker. Her husband knows. I was informed and shown a picture that all 3 of them went to a concert this weekend together. I guess I will just never understand how her husband is ok with that. It almost makes me sad for him. But also makes me question my stbxh even more , of how he could look that man in the face.


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## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

Maybe they’re a throuple. Or her husband enjoys being a cuckold. Or any number of situations. I wouldn’t concern myself if I were you — he’s someone else’s problem now.


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## Ldziesinski (Nov 18, 2021)

Openminded said:


> Maybe they’re a throuple. Or her husband enjoys being a cuckold. Or any number of situations. I wouldn’t concern myself if I were you — he’s someone else’s problem now.


Oh for sure. I have wondered about the throuple thing, because when we were all “friends” and I say that lightly knowing what I know now - they talked a lot about swinging


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## BeyondRepair007 (Nov 4, 2021)

Ldziesinski said:


> Oh for sure. I have wondered about the throuple thing, because when we were all “friends” and I say that lightly knowing what I know now - they talked a lot about swinging


I wonder how long that little gang will last. I hear horror stories on here about it the death of marriages over stuff like this.

But no matter. He’s gone, out of your life (nearly) and can join all the “uples” he wants.
Trash does that ya know. Join uples.


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## Ldziesinski (Nov 18, 2021)

BeyondRepair007 said:


> I wonder how long that little gang will last. I hear horror stories on here about it the death of marriages over stuff like this.
> 
> But no matter. He’s gone, out of your life (nearly) and can join all the “uples” he wants.
> Trash does that ya know. Join uples.


Horror stories of what ?


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

Ldziesinski said:


> I have been no contact with my stbxh since December. He is having / had an affair with his coworker. Her husband knows. I was informed and shown a picture that all 3 of them went to a concert this weekend together. I guess I will just never understand how her husband is ok with that. It almost makes me sad for him. But also makes me question my stbxh even more , of how he could look that man in the face.


Maybe that's the only way to stay by his wife's side, or maybe he's taking the high road or something. One of my ex-bfs will still be cordial to a guy we both knew who flat-out stole his second wife (and got what he deserved, so I guess actually did him a favor). He just has a practice of not being nasty to anyone, I think.


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## BeyondRepair007 (Nov 4, 2021)

Ldziesinski said:


> Horror stories of what ?


Stories of a happily married couple that invites another person (m or f) inti their marriage and suddenly the marriage is in shambles because someone got the feels and someone else was in the cold.

Point being a three way is not for everyone, I’m not even convinced it’s for most who try it.
But I guess time will tell.


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## Ldziesinski (Nov 18, 2021)

BeyondRepair007 said:


> Stories of a happily married couple that invites another person (m or f) inti their marriage and suddenly the marriage is in shambles because someone got the feels and someone else was in the cold.
> 
> Point being a three way is not for everyone, I’m not even convinced it’s for most who try it.
> But I guess time will tell.


True. From different conversations we’ve had before everything exploded I think this is just who she is and the poor guy just accepts it to keep her and maybe for their kids


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## Ldziesinski (Nov 18, 2021)

DownByTheRiver said:


> Maybe that's the only way to stay by his wife's side, or maybe he's taking the high road or something. One of my ex-bfs will still be cordial to a guy we both knew who flat-out stole his second wife (and got what he deserved, so I guess actually did him a favor). He just has a practice of not being nasty to anyone, I think.


I try not to make it a habit of being nasty to anyone, but I definitely won’t be doing any brunch dates with this woman 😂 after everything was out I got texts from her gloating that he hates me and loves her and the she “won” , such a prize 😂


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

Ldziesinski said:


> I try not to make it a habit of being nasty to anyone, but I definitely won’t be doing any brunch dates with this woman 😂 after everything was out I got texts from her gloating that he hates me and loves her and the she “won” , such a prize 😂


Sounds very mature. She won the prize whoopee. Serves her right.


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## A18S37K14H18 (Dec 14, 2021)

Hold your head high OP. Living well is the best response and they will crash and burn... sometime, it's not if, but when.

I was cheated on, badly, by my first husband, too much to get into, but he ended up in similar things due to meeting an older lady who was a swinger. Her husband and she had like 8 to 10 other couples they swung with, meeting in their private homes. This lady wanted my husband to join them though my husband would do anything with another man. He did have sex with many of those women though and they were being watched, that's all I'll get into.

I'm sorry you're in this boat and I'm GLAD to hear you are no contact with your ex-husband, keep it that way.

I've not seen or talked with my first husband since the summer of 2013.


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## Marc878 (Aug 26, 2015)

Ldziesinski said:


> I have been no contact with my stbxh since December. He is having / had an affair with his coworker. Her husband knows. I was informed and shown a picture that all 3 of them went to a concert this weekend together. I guess I will just never understand how her husband is ok with that. It almost makes me sad for him. But also makes me question my stbxh even more , of how he could look that man in the face.


No contact is your best path. Your concern is for yourself. No one else really matters but you in this situation l


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

I hear my ex hb has dinner regularly with his 1st wife and her husband.

They never had an actual affair while we were married, at least that I know of, but they always had terrible boundaries so who knows.

Everyone that I speak to who knows them thinks they whole situation is weird....he just gives off a weird vibe. I was told by a mutual friend that my ex had a weird vibe that I smoothed over.

Ex was a phony love bomber so he probably fawns all over her with compliments and she eats it up. I couldn't eat up his compliments because I knew the phony scumbag he really was.

Why her hb puts up with it is beyond me but whatever. Once they're an ex they no longer matter to you.


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## She'sStillGotIt (Jul 30, 2016)

*


Ldziesinski said:



I have been no contact with my stbxh since December. He is having / had an affair with his coworker. Her husband knows. I was informed and shown a picture that all 3 of them went to a concert this weekend together. I guess I will just never understand how her husband is ok with that. It almost makes me sad for him. But also makes me question my stbxh even more , of how he could look that man in the face.

Click to expand...

*He is what's known as a "simp."


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## Cooper (Apr 18, 2008)

Who thought it was a great idea to share photos of the three of them together? Who's following their activities and telling you about it? 

No contact means washing your hands of the other person. Someone feeding you little tidbits of gossip does you more harm than good. Tell the person to stop it because you don't care, and if it's you secretly cyber stalking him knock it off.


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## Ldziesinski (Nov 18, 2021)

Cooper said:


> Who thought it was a great idea to share photos of the three of them together? Who's following their activities and telling you about it?
> 
> No contact means washing your hands of the other person. Someone feeding you little tidbits of gossip does you more harm than good. Tell the person to stop it because you don't care, and if it's you secretly cyber stalking him knock it off.


That’s not actually how it happened, it’s not cyber stalking how about you settle down.


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## Ldziesinski (Nov 18, 2021)

lifeistooshort said:


> I hear my ex hb has dinner regularly with his 1st wife and her husband.
> 
> They never had an actual affair while we were married, at least that I know of, but they always had terrible boundaries so who knows.
> 
> ...


I’m just amazed I think that a woman who had proven she lives, is disloyal ect ect can have 2 men eating out of her hand at the same time, literally 😆


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## BeyondRepair007 (Nov 4, 2021)

Ldziesinski said:


> I’m just amazed I think that a woman who had proven she lives, is disloyal ect ect can have 2 men eating out of her hand at the same time, literally 😆


Men are suckers for a pretty face. or..well, not even a pretty face if they open their legs on demand.


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## Ldziesinski (Nov 18, 2021)

Best part about all of this , my stbxh paid for all the tickets 😑


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## Ldziesinski (Nov 18, 2021)

Ldziesinski said:


> That’s not actually how it happened, it’s not cyber stalking how about you settle down.





BeyondRepair007 said:


> Men are suckers for a pretty face. or..well, not even a pretty face if they open their legs on demand.





Cooper said:


> Who thought it was a great idea to share photos of the three of them together? Who's following their activities and telling you about it?
> 
> No contact means washing your hands of the other person. Someone feeding you little tidbits of gossip does you more harm than good. Tell the person to stop it because you don't care, and if it's you secretly cyber stalking him knock it off.


it’s not like that at all. I was going rabbit hunting with a friend, we were going to an area my stbxh has frequented to hunt so I asked him to check his Snapchat/ fb to make sure he wasn’t out at the same location. And the snap played and I saw it and recognized them. It wasn’t anyone showing me on purpose or stalking- just making sure we weren’t going to be in the woods, in the same area at the same time. A safety precaution for myself.


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