# Caught in the middle!



## Confused_and_bitter (Aug 6, 2011)

I'm having issues of the constant bickering between my brothers and my husband. Let me start from the beginning....

When I was dating my H everything was fine between him and my two older brothers they were quick friends after I introduced him to my family, however, once we were married it all changed.

I kept being told that he needed to change jobs to provide better and because I thought that they were looking out for me I convinced my H to quit his retail job to get his CDL like my brothers did and become a truck driver. I also got my CDL and about a year and a half after working for other people/companies my dad helped us purchase our own truck. My dad has helped all of his children as much as possible and has tried to keep it even. Work has been steady ever since.

Just recently I come to find out my brothers have seen us (my H and I) as a couple of leeches that feed off my parents and take advantage that he sees my DD more than he sees his other grandkids. I live with my parents we are trying to save money to purchase our own home but in the meanwhile we help with bills, groceries and I take charge of all the cleaning and cooking of the house, which is an agreement that both my parents and I reached.

They constantly put down my H calling him names and ignoring him (they all work for the same carrier) so my H gets frustrated. I do admit my H doesn't maintain the truck how he is supposed to and over the years he has progressed some. But to my both my brother's standards it hasn't been quick enough and they keep yelling at me about my H. When they do help with the truck they tell him to move because he just gets in the way so he ends up being the parts and food runner instead, this BTW I was told by my brother's and they said they preferred it that way, yet they complain that he hasn't learned anything. When I was pregnant they were constantly complaining that I was going to be the favorite and that the other grandchildren will be ignored especially if I had a boy.

While I was pregnant H was spending more time with my brothers going out to dinners and bars that whole time I did not hear one single complaint about H but when I started getting bothered by it (H would be gone all week so I only saw him on weekends, when he didn't go hang out with them) I brought it up to H and my brothers started calling me a b!tch and that I was too controlling and were telling me I would be the only one to blame if we got divorced. I would cry because I wanted to go out with my H before the baby arrived but it was a no go. 

Once our little girl was born. H kept up the going out until I told him I had enough, so he started coming home, soon after the complaints with H started again. Now almost 3 yrs later the complaints and insults just keep coming. H is frustrated and tired of it, I can't blame him because I'm tired of it too, now they tell me that my H talks to them with attitude and that he shouldn't do that but I have heard them talk to him and its all yelling and insults. How is someone suppose to talk to these kind of people in a respectful manner? When they get mad at him they take it out on me too, one brother yells while the other one ignores, but when they need me to do something for them (you can basically say I manage their business along with my H's) they call and demand it telling me that what I do isn't important because my hands don't get dirty and besides I have nothing else to do.

I have enough issues with my H and we are thisclose to getting separated. I am tired of being put in the middle my brothers tell my mom that I need to put my foot in H's a$$ and get him more responsible with the truck, funny that when I did do that they would call me a b!tch. I feel stuck. H says he would rather quit the trucking business and get a local job and work on our marriage, I agree. My brothers got wind of this and went maniacal screaming that we don't appreciate what they have done for us and how we are going to screw over my dad. I don't know what to do anyone have advice? Anything? :scratchhead:

Thanks 
C&B


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## F-102 (Sep 15, 2010)

Here's one idea: move FAR, FAR away!


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## Confused_and_bitter (Aug 6, 2011)

Thanks for taking the time to reply I really appreciate it! My H suggested that and now seriously considering it.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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