# A misplaced pepper



## coffeetogo (Jan 15, 2013)

So here is the background, my wife and I had been out for a walk and decided on a little impromptu late lunch. Not long after our meals were served served a piece of red pepper fell from my fork onto the floor ( I don't know if it is worth mentioning, but I like red peppers and the floor was a polished brick/tile). I didn't think much about it and went on eating my lunch, conversing with my wife. When lunch was over, waiting for the cheque my wife asked if I had picked up/cleaned up my mess. I answered that I had not. I need to add that sometime between the time the piece of pepper fell and when I was getting the cheque that I inadvertently stepped on the pepper, mashing it into the polished brick/tile floor. Things went downhill from there. She claimed that I had no concern about the people who would eventually have to clean up my mess and furthermore, I should have cleaned up the mess that I made. My opinion; although I fully agree that the piece of pepper fell from my fork, it was an accident (I wasn't playing around with my food) and that the restaurant does have people who can deal with this a lot easier, with the proper cleaning aids and possibly more graceful than I would have done.


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## humanbecoming (Mar 14, 2012)

Well, her getting on you about it is a bit over the top, but if I'm out eating, or we have our kids out, we always pick up any messes dropped, stack dishes, wipe stuff off the tables. Then again, if I am in a public restroom washing my hands, I'll use paper towels to wipe up the sink area of water, and pick up other peoples discarded towels. If we all took 3 seconds extra, the world would be a much more pleasant place, ya know?


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## 3Xnocharm (Jun 22, 2012)

Wow. Big time over-reaction!


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## KathyBatesel (Apr 26, 2012)

Sounds like this is just one of many things to fight over. Why is she so unhappy?


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## Acorn (Dec 16, 2010)

Her: Did you pick up the pepper you dropped?
You: No, but I left a better than usual tip because I knew I caused extra work for the server.

Problem solved.


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## Holland (Aug 20, 2012)

Thanks for the laugh.

You have quite a way with words. I like red peppers too, the green ones however leave me cold.


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## Cletus (Apr 27, 2012)

I worked in fast food in college. 

There was a family from an ethnic background I won't divulge who would come in to our restaurant and basically set off a bomb in their meals. Food everywhere - on the table, windows, floor, seats, you name it.

Now a single pepper isn't in the same ballpark, but I am personally trained to wipe the table and pick up anything I dropped on the floor before I leave as a courtesy. 

Everyone's mileage varies.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

The restaurant has staff paid to clean up after dinners leave the table.

She had a huge over reaction. She's not your mommy.


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## Emerald (Aug 2, 2012)

Do you have a question and/or are you seeking advice?


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## Gaia (Apr 27, 2012)

Well if she or someone close to her has or is working as staff that cleans up I can understand where she is comming from. In fact I am much the same way with my spouse. Although there is staff to clean up any messes its just polite to show them some courtesy and make thier jobs a bit easier. They are people too and just because they are trained to clean up doesnt mean that is an excuse for customers to be slobs or be sloppy. 

Sure it may have been one pepper to you but I am betting she had a problem with your attitide about it, not the pepper.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## F-102 (Sep 15, 2010)

I don't recall going into any restaurants that have signs saying:

"Your mother does not work here-You will have to pick up after yourself".


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## Gaia (Apr 27, 2012)

Lol neither have I but I am sure his wifes issue isnt about an accidental drop of a pepper. Public restrooms dont have that sign either but I dont feel that entitles people to pee all over the floors, wipe shyt on the walls, throw toilet paper all over the place, ect. His wife may feel the same way and who knows. It may be that he did something more then drop a pepper on the ground in the past that caused her to be aggrivated with him.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

It really depends on the kind of place it is. Some places don't want their patrons cleaning stuff up from the floor. Like if you only had a cloth napkin, NO WAY should you be using it to clean the floor. Don't even go there. DO apologize for your mishap and leave a couple bucks extra tip. If the food was good you can mention how disappointed you are that even one morsel escaped you. 

If it's a casual place and it seems as though the pepper wouldn't be cleaned up or even noticed, yes, clean it up with a paper napkin so that the next person who comes along doesn't step on it. 

It's bad manners to ruin a good meal with a close friend (or husband) by making an issue of such a thing. I can't understand someone who argues at a table that is meant for nourishing body and soul. If it bothered her and you weren't going to clean it up, the correct response is to keep her feeling to herself but to personally honor them by saying, enthusiastically, "Then allow me! Please sir, would you be so kind as to rearrange your feet so that I may clean up the spoils or your splendid repast?" While she's under the table she could give you a grope. lol.


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## Gaia (Apr 27, 2012)

Pffft at the last part lmao. That is something to think about though as well. Of course I never been to a resturaunt that would be offended if you cleaned up a mess though...
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Cletus (Apr 27, 2012)

Gaia said:


> Lol neither have I but I am sure his wifes issue isnt about an accidental drop of a pepper. Public restrooms dont have that sign either but I dont feel that entitles people to pee all over the floors, wipe shyt on the walls, throw toilet paper all over the place, ect. His wife may feel the same way and who knows. It may be that he did something more then drop a pepper on the ground in the past that caused her to be aggrivated with him.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Yeah, this place is notorious for extrapolating from one poster's description of a single event. I'm surprised someone hasn't diagnosed BPD in the wife yet and suggested meds to solve her problem.


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## SpinDaddy (Nov 12, 2012)

From the table yes, the floor no. But we also tip 20%.


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## OnTheRocks (Sep 26, 2011)

Cletus said:


> Yeah, this place is notorious for extrapolating from one poster's description of a single event. I'm surprised someone hasn't diagnosed BPD in the wife yet and suggested meds to solve her problem.


SHE'S CHEATING!! LOL

Seriously, that's an absurd overreaction for a pepper. There has to be more going on here.


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## Gaia (Apr 27, 2012)

Lol @ the cheating thing.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

Honestly, I thought you were going to say you picked it up and ate it, and then she didn't want you to go down on her. 

The guy I dated during the summer would be a prude like that. The funny thing is, his house was an environmental nightmare, but he was super cautious about his health, out of respect for him, I won't describe his personal habits, but some of them were a little extreme.


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## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

I wonder if his W would feel better if he took the dishes to the kitchen and scrubbed off whatever bits of food and sauce were still on the plates before handing it to the dishwasher. Maybe he could have offered to wet mop the floors after.

It's a restaurant, you are paying for service.


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## Malcolm38 (Dec 25, 2012)

Insist on a Polygraph....Install a tracking device on her mobile phone and get a VAR for her vehicle....oh wait

Just tell her that she's not your Mom.


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

Lon said:


> I wonder if his W would feel better if he took the dishes to the kitchen and scrubbed off whatever bits of food and sauce were still on the plates before handing it to the dishwasher. Maybe he could have offered to wet mop the floors after.
> 
> It's a restaurant, you are paying for service.


My kids' dad used to pick up the plate and lick it!
I never did marry him. 
He just had too many eccentric habits and beliefs.
Dude, at least censor yourself when you're in public!

I would probably be mortified if my date SCRAPED something off the floor. If it has to be scraped, leave it be and add to the tip.
Maybe if there's a paper napkin, discreetly wipe the bottom of the shoe so as not to track the stuff across the floor. But alas, you will have to then go to the restroom because there is NO WAY you should now put that napkin on the table. 

But no scraping smooshed stuff off the floor of a restaurant. It just crosses that line between guest and staff. You are there to eat and to provide employment for the staff. Cleaning the floor is a reasonable task for a waitstaff. Tip according to the mess, they will appreciate the opportunity as that is what they do for work. 

Of course, if something has been dropped that can be smooshed and is going to be on the floor causing a distraction for the rest of your meal, and you have a paper napkin and spares, like the kind of place that puts napkin dispensers on the table, go ahead and pick it up to avoid making a bigger mess. But do it discreetly. And again, that package now does not go on the table. Take it to the restroom and dispose of it there. 

The best way to avoid having to do all that is to ask the waitstaff for an extra paper napkin for the pepper you dropped on the floor. At this point the waitstaff should pick it up/clean it up or arrange to have the bus boy/girl do so. 

I think some people have issues with being guests at a restaurant and being waited on. Wait staff are trained specialists in the art of hospitality. If you have an issue while at table, it's a bit rude not to let them deal with it. It's an act of gracious negotiation. But for the most part, the rule of thumb is that guests should stay above the table, unless it's a duck and cover scenario.

But the rudest thing is to start unpleasant conversation over what could be an otherwise pleasant meal. I won't date a guy I had been seeing again because he persisted in asking me about my past relationships over a meal. I had told him my marriage was abusive, and said to him, I don't want to spoil my appetite and this nice meal. He could not leave it alone. He got defensive instead of saving that conversation for some other time. And yes, my appetite really was spoiled, I had been enjoying myself and not thinking about my horrific ex at all!


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## Waking up to life (Nov 29, 2012)

OnTheRocks said:


> SHE'S CHEATING!! LOL


LMAO!! :rofl:

Ok seriously, are you, perhaps, a slob at home and your "misplaced pepper" incident hit a nerve with her?


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## Thundarr (Jul 4, 2012)

I'm with your wife on this one coffee. It's not the pepper, it's the sentiment of expecting others to clean up your mess and having no regard for them. Sure, your semantics are correct that people work there who get paid to pick it up if you leave it.


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## Thundarr (Jul 4, 2012)

I Just read more posts and apparently *I'm the lone ranger here for thinking you were rude*. Maybe not intentionally.

I generally like to be around people who I think are nice and think about how they affect the people around them. I was a jock in school but there were some guys I played sports with that I just had no use for because they didn't seem very nice to anyone who wasn't like them.

I also avoid (when possible) going out to eat with a few people I know because they are really just mean to the waitress. Don't get me wrong though, I'll voice when the food or service is not good too but not in such a demeaning nasty way as others.

ANYWAY: I don't think she was crazy to be annoyed about it or to voice it.


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## StargateFan (Nov 19, 2012)

Come on people the economy is tough and people are getting laid off constantly. This man is providing job security for some bus boy.

I used to work at a drug store and every night we had to "face" the shelves. Especially hard in the OTC drug isle. Now I purposely make a mess of things, push stuff back, pick up stuff and put it some were else. Anything I can do to stick it to the man, and help out the little guy. :rofl:


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## Gaia (Apr 27, 2012)

I still think its more then a silly little pepper and your not alone thundar I feel the same as you do.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## SpinDaddy (Nov 12, 2012)

Homemaker_Numero_Uno said:


> My kids' dad used to pick up the plate and lick it!
> I never did marry him.
> . . . .


He was trying to turn you on. Guess it didn’t work. Little more subtlety would have been better?


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## Gaia (Apr 27, 2012)

SpinDaddy said:


> He was trying to turn you on. Guess it didn’t work. Little more subtlety would have been better?


Lmao!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

maybe it just bugged her that he didn't notice the pepper and smooshed it and then stillllllll didn't notice it. I mean, how UNAWARE is that? (It might have been that he's just relaxed, or wearing thick soled shoes...)


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## Cosmos (May 4, 2012)

In many restaurants, a patron scrambling around under the table cleaning up might be frowned upon...


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## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

If it were me I'd probably pick it up myself too, and then feel embarrassed that people would see me doing that.

But if left it there I'd be ashamed of how the employees viewed me.

But then I look at it as if it were my own restaurant, and I pride myself on customer service and would prefer the guests do not have to clean my restaurant for me. But then some owners and employees probably only care about tips and profits and dont want to spend their time cleaning food off the floor and to them I say then get out of the hospitality industry, and to stick it to them I'd leave the food on the floor. Why should I have to feel guilty about all this?

The only real solution is to not let the food drop in the first place.


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## F-102 (Sep 15, 2010)

To the OP:

Does your W come from a "lower-class" background? I'll explain my question later.


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## Waking up to life (Nov 29, 2012)

Anyone else notice that the OP hasn't participated in this thread since he started it? I say let's let it drop and spend our energies on people who actually participate on TAM.


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