# Any advice from the successful reconciliators?



## oklahoma1701

My wife and I have been separated for 4 months. During the first month, there was a lot of anger and confusion on both our parts on where we wanted to go and what we wanted to do.

The 2nd month got a little better. Communication started opening up and we started getting things out.

The 3rd month, we actually went on a mini-vacation (platonic) with the kids and attended Christmas parties and family gettogethers together (but still stating we were separated to people). 

The beginning for the 4th month, we actually spent Christmas Eve night together with the kids and even slept in the bed together. We cuddled some, but that is it. We went to my family's Christmas lunch together too. New Years Eve, I invited her to come along with my friends and I and she accepted. We had a great time and she even mentioned that had my friends not been with me that she'd have invited me to stay over with her. 

Now, we come to the last week. I asked her if I could take her out for her birthday and she agreed. Well, tonight is the night I'm taking her out and I have planned out a great evening. 

Here's my question... for those of you who have gone through this process successfully, what conversation topics should I go to and which should we avoid tonight? I would prefer to not talk about the kids or the relationship woes... I want this to be a fun evening. I don't want it to be sad/depressing if I can avoid it.

Also, on physical touching? How much is too much for a first date such as this?

I told her that my only expectations for the date was that she have a great time, I get a hug by nights end, and I get a picture of the two of us together to commemorate the evening.

Any advice or insight that you guys might have is appreciated!


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## testing123

I can't comment on what kind of conversation topics you should avoid, but I just wanted to post a quick congratulations to you. This must feel great, so happy for you. I'm in the middle of month 2, and I really hope that we will decide to work towards reconciliation, and that it goes as well for us as it has for you.


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## asylumspadez

Try to avoid anything that may upset her. Just relax and enjoy the night and see how things work out. Good luck.


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## synthetic

This is really encouraging to someone like me

thank u

unfortunately i have no advice to give u as im in the first 4 weeks of my separation and experiencing the unpleasant roller coaster ride. I hope i get to where u are. It feels like a distant dream. Consider urself very forttunate
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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