# He filed...



## LilMamaSlim (May 12, 2009)

Well, Tuesday my STBX stopped by to see our son and while he was here he brought some custody papers. They read that he could see our son every other weekend and a few hours Tuesday and Thursday nights, this wasn't so bad. Then he tells me to get ready, he filed for divorce and the papers were coming next week. I broke down and started crying. Sobbing actually.

Now don't get me wrong, I knew he was gone for good and have come to terms with that. It is just the whole seeing it and living it. He wants to settle this to where we both walk away with what we have, however I won't and he knows this. I mentioned to him how he left us with $5000.00 debt in my name, he racked up those bills (utility that he NEVER paid and hid the bills from me.) I also mentioned how I was getting calls from a cell phone company stating that I had a cell phone that had not been paid, which HE HAS. He said "When I left those bills were paid." So we got into a small argument and I said "How did I rack up a 1700 dollar gas bill in JUNE!? You knew these bills weren't paid and hadn't been. You'll either help me one way or another."

Any suggestions? I am sure I can call the companies and get information on how high the bills were in April but I can't afford an attorney. X made sure of that.

I am still in awe at how fast he not only left but how quickly he filed. As if he wanted this over and done with, no reconciliation whatsoever. I have never felt so useless and unwanted as I did when he told me that.


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## Corpuswife (Apr 24, 2009)

It hurts. No matter if you know it's coming. It hurts. There is a always a seedling of hope that he may turn things around. 

To leave you and your children with bills unpaid is sad state. It's selfish.

Are the bills in your name? If not, let him suffer. If so, then negotiate the important ones (electric). The other one (credit cards) you may need to let go. Prioritize (rent, electric, food). Just do what you can. 

As far as how quickly he filed. Anyone else in the picture?


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## LilMamaSlim (May 12, 2009)

Not that I know of, I mean the bills are all in my name, he never paid his prior to our getting together so they all had to be in my name. I never let him get any credit cards in my name, so the utility bills are the only ones I worry about. He doesn't care what happens to us, he never did.


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## Amplexor (Feb 13, 2008)

LilMamaSlim said:


> I am still in awe at how fast he not only left but how quickly he filed. As if he wanted this over and done with, no reconciliation whatsoever. I have never felt so useless and unwanted as I did when he told me that.


It is he who has walked away from his responsibilities as a husband and father. You shouldn’t blame yourself, you were willing to work at it, he wasn’t. 

Contact your utility company and explain the situation. They will usually be pretty good about working out a payment plan with you. Also many attorneys will offer a cursory no charge session to explain to you the divorce process. Many states also have information on local laws on the web.

Good luck.


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## LilMamaSlim (May 12, 2009)

Thanks so much, I am calling them today. Today is just not going well at all so hopefully it gets better. Seems as though if you borrow money from the department of public welfare for an emergency (aka husband leaving out of nowhere) you have to pay back 3 times as much as you needed...


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## Corpuswife (Apr 24, 2009)

Wow-3 times! That is a loan shark!!

Well, once you are informed of your rights from an attorney you will feel better. Perhaps emergency support may be enacted by your attorney?


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## srena200 (Jul 13, 2009)

Get your self a good lawyer. Ask any women in the area who are going through this if they can recommend or start searching the yellow pages and get some FREE consultations at the very least.


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## DeniseK (Jun 25, 2009)

Yes. And...don't worry about those bills. At the very least you can always file bankruptcy...as a very last resort. And you know...you might be able to find a cheap attorney who will hold off on your side of the bill and get it from HIM when you go to court. It doesn't hurt to ask.

No one is giong to kill you for having these bills. I know that stress...I am living it too. but I do have a bit of help from my mother. Check around....there are people in this world who help out those in need...few and far between...but if you are willing to look...they are out there.

Keep your head held high...it will be okay...sooner than later.


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