# Today is my Anniversary - not Happy



## justme43 (Sep 8, 2011)

Today is my 21st anniversary. In the last 6 months, my husband has told me he hasn't felt any emotional or romantic feelings toward me in "many, many years". This came out of the blue for me but since that time he has insisted on no sex or even touching. We have three kids still at home and no one has a clue that we are having problems because we never argued and didn't display affection that often. He has gone to mc with me for the past few weeks but nothing has improved. Tomorrow is our third meeting. It gives me hope when we go but then he won't talk about anything important again until the next meeting. As far as today goes, I want to give him a card and gift (clothes) but I don't think he'll have anything for me and wonder if it will be worse if I give him these things. A few days ago I sent an email asking if he wanted anything in particular and he didn't respond. (I think he would love to say, yes, please sign the divorce decree that I will put in your card.... although he hasn't come out and said he has started any divorce proceedings all signs are pointed in that direction.) The (teenage) kids have been talking about our anniversary coming up and his mother is here visiting so I'm sure they will be talking about it but I'm not quite sure what I should do. Thank you.


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## sadcat (Aug 23, 2010)

Hi, I'm really sorry that you are in this situation. I think you should ask him to have a frank discussion and what he plans to do. It is no good going to mc and not talking about it, you are wasting your time. If he insists on leaving then I'm not sure if there is anything you can do. You will need to let your children know what's going on, they are teenagers so I think they will understand. I think it's not healthy for you to be in a one sided relationship, you deserve better! Good luck.


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## southernmagnolia (Apr 12, 2011)

Have you considered the possibility that there is an affair going on? I think you should investigate to rule it out.


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## eclectic (Sep 7, 2011)

I agree with Magnolia--definitely investigate the affair possibility! Has he come out and told you what his issue with you is, why he's feeling that way? What does he say in MC? What does he want to change?

Since he didn't respond when you asked him what he wants for the anniversary, I would NOT get him anything! But you should acknowlege the anniversary, tell him you love him. Best of luck to you!


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