# online dating sites and husband who lies



## sunny0110 (Mar 14, 2010)

Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I've been married for 20 years now.Three years ago my husband left home to run an errand and I got on the computer, and I saw he had left his email open on a reply from a woman he met on a online dating site. Up until that day I would never have thought my husband would do anything like that. When he got back, I confronted him about it, and he denied it was his doing, said the guys at work must have got in his email and did it as a joke, came up with all kinds of lies about how he had happened to have his profile on several different dating sites saying he was divorced. After several days of denial, he finally admitted to me it was him, but that he would never go so far as to cheat on me, swore it would never happen again, and we worked through it.

Then one year ago, his grandmother fell and broke her leg, she lives alone in another state and needed help after she got home from the hospital. My husband was unemployed at the time, so we decided he would go stay with her for a month or two to help her till she got back on her feet. I went out to visit him after he had been gone 6 weeks, and while there discovered he was back to the online dating again. In fact had started looking within days of getting there. Not only that but be had several different emails accounts, and had sent emails to a couple women. I found out how deep it all went over a few months time and only after I had came back home, and after MANY lies were told and revealed. He said he was truly sorry, had never talked or chatted or met with anyone, but for a long time I felt he really was in denial that it was a form of cheating. What really hurt and bothered me, was he had profiles on sites that were just for sex, and had posted his sexual preferences. He claims he only joined because he wanted to look at photos of nude women, but there are plenty of porn sites on the internet for that. It took several months for me to forgive him, but there is a BIG trust issue still. Because now over a year later, we are still in a long distance relationship as he is still living out there, his grandmother is in even worse health, and he is working there. We only get to visit each other every few months. He is planning on coming back soon, but now I'm not sure if I trust him anymore.. I know that once you have decided to forgive and stay in a marriage or relationship, you can't keep bringing up the past, but without us being able to live together since all that happened,I don't feel the pain has really healed. And I keep having all these suspicions he's still doing it, I don't feel like I'm moving past all the lies at all. I love him still but no longer trust him


----------



## anon2010 (Jan 29, 2010)

Leave him and don't look back. I caught my husband many a times on online dating sites and so foolishly believed his stories and explanations. Only after a concrete evidence was I able to look past his good guy facade and really dig for facts. All his stories are unraveling now and it's just a huge web of lies and deceit woven over the years. I can't believe how stupid and how naive I've been! Now I'm paying for it with my health. If I were you I would leave him before it's too late.


----------

