# Genuine interest? Hidden agenda?



## yellowsubmarine (Feb 3, 2012)

This post will be lighter than any others of mine so far...I think. I was wondering how those of you coping thru this life changing event are dealing with proposals from the opposite sex.

Some flirting seems harmless, and if it's just an exchange of a few innocent words in a public place, I get a little ego boost and move on about my day. However... when a "creep" that is just about more than old enough to be my father (not interested in a sugar daddy... LOL!) wants to get to know me better, I run for the mountains. 

Just curious if any of you encounter these situations, and have some good stories to share. Some might feel that I may be vulnerable, but really... I can take care of myself. 

Any good stories out there? I'm a good mood today


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

I was so turned off by any kind of "proposal" or flirtation by other men when going through my separation or divorce, that it wasn't even possible to register for me.

Some people can go through a divorce as if it's just a regular Sunday--and start dating and flirting and loving any attention they receive. This was not the case with me.

It was quite a blow to my life and not something I took lightly at all. I felt completely traumatized by the event and spent a long time wanting to hide away from the world. It was like being in a fugue for me. 

Just my 2 cents.


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## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

it's only been a month for me so not even entertaining those thoughts yet!


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## sd212 (Feb 24, 2012)

From a male perspective, I've embraced the two times when women have flirted with me and neither turned out well.

I don't think I'll stop trying to be open to it though b/c I have to believe in love again one day. I have to believe that shutting down will only hurt me. Now, a creep, that would be different of course. 

It is really good for the ego though and we all need that right now. I just don't think it has been healthy for me.


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## Mamatomany (Jan 10, 2012)

I realized today that it's been almost 5 months since I have had sex... I am okay if someone flirts w/ me. It won't go anywhere yet, but I don't think he is coming back and I am moving on. After the rejection from our spouses a good ego boost every once in a while is totally appreciated. Besides it's been almost 3 decades since I have been single. I need practice  

I do think I could date someone older... but not my dad's age! I also think that me having young children and at my age it will turn a lot of older men off (that could be good and bad).


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## madaboutlove (Aug 28, 2011)

Ugh, I have not had sex in 18 months! So tired of being alone and untouched. I am also having a hard time with this D but no where near ready to be dating again. However, I would like to have some time with a real man sometime soon


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## Numb in Ohio (Oct 31, 2011)

We are not able to wear rings at work anyway, but I was waiting on an OLDER man at work the other day, and he asked me if I was married. When I told him yes , he said "darn, thought I might of had a chance" .. I think I threw up in my mouth a little,, CREEPY...


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## sd212 (Feb 24, 2012)

Numb in Ohio said:


> We are not able to wear rings at work anyway, but I was waiting on an OLDER man at work the other day, and he asked me if I was married. When I told him yes , he said "darn, thought I might of had a chance" .. I think I threw up in my mouth a little,, CREEPY...


LOL. i'm very young but note to self: Do not become a creepy old man who hits on young girls!!!:lol:


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## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

I just registered for a dating site, and when I checked it tonight, I had a message from someone who thought my profile looked interesting (haven't posted a photo yet), and wanted to chat. He's 28!!! I'm 47. My STBXH is younger than me, but yikes!! It says my age right there on my profile! WTH! :crazy:


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

Cougar.


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## LonelyHusband (Sep 2, 2011)

madaboutlove said:


> Ugh, I have not had sex in 18 months! So tired of being alone and untouched. I am also having a hard time with this D but no where near ready to be dating again. However, I would like to have some time with a real man sometime soon


I'm right there with you...been over a year for me...and I miss a woman's touch....but my divorce is so draining, I haven't really thought about dating either...


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## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

WorkingOnMe said:


> Cougar.


Hey! I resemble, er, RESENT that remark.


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## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

airplane888 said:


> of course sex is not a requirement for a healthy life, no one ever died because they didn't have a orgasm or get laid
> 
> airplane


Despite the other thread I started in the private section, I think this is true. Far more than sex, I miss hand-holding, kisses, hugs, and cuddling, back-rubs, etc. If I had those, I'd be able to live without sex. I mean that.


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## DanF (Sep 27, 2010)

I am in a male dominated industry, so the opportunity to flirt is very remote for me. I do and have flirted back and forth in airports along the way and I know that it's harmless from my end.
My wife works with many men and flirts back and forth quite a bit.
I think hers is harmless as well.

I also think that a little flirting is healthy and lets you know that you are desirable and fun.


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## Mamatomany (Jan 10, 2012)

angelpixie said:


> Despite the other thread I started in the private section, I think this is true. Far more than sex, I miss hand-holding, kisses, hugs, and cuddling, back-rubs, etc. If I had those, I'd be able to live without sex. I mean that.


Most definitely! Just the intimacy / companionship is totally missed. 

I wasn't getting much of that this past fall either.


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## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

angelpixie said:


> Despite the other thread I started in the private section, I think this is true. Far more than sex, I miss hand-holding, kisses, hugs, and cuddling, back-rubs, etc. If I had those, I'd be able to live without sex. I mean that.


not me, I want it all.


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## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

Lon said:


> not me, I want it all.


me too!! we haven't had really GOOD sex in over a year as we were both detaching

I'm ready for a proper 'swinging from the chandeliers' type experience ha ha


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## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

Dollystanford said:


> I'm ready for a proper 'swinging from the chandeliers' type experience ha ha


Well, now that you mention it, I guess I wouldn't turn one down, either, LOL.


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## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

I'm really refraining here from making innapropriate comments ladies... TAM isn't supposed to be an online dating site, right?


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## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

We're not trolling, just stating opinions, right, Dolly?


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## 2nd_t!me iz_best (Feb 28, 2011)

angelpixie said:


> Well, now that you mention it, I guess I wouldn't turn one down, either, LOL.




reeeeeeally.


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## 2nd_t!me iz_best (Feb 28, 2011)

angelpixie said:


> Despite the other thread I started in the private section, I think this is true. Far more than sex, I miss hand-holding, kisses, hugs, and cuddling, back-rubs, etc. If I had those, I'd be able to live without sex. I mean that.


i certainly miss all this too BUT...
i think youre going just a bit too far


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## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

2nd_t!me iz_best said:


> reeeeeeally.


Under a very specific set of conditions. I'm a good girl. Really. :biggrinangelA:
(Just in case my dad happens to be surfing the net & sees this thread.)


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## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

angelpixie said:


> We're not trolling, just stating opinions, right, Dolly?


hell yeah! ha ha
look I'm 36, I'm in my prime - it's not my fault, it's all biological


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## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

Dollystanford said:


> hell yeah! ha ha
> look I'm 36, I'm in my prime - it's not my fault, it's all biological


36, in your prime and "DTF" 

Too bad you are on the other side of the pond. You like to travel Dolly?

edit: wait, I keep remembering you are married woman - take it to your H!!


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## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

Lon said:


> 36, in your prime and "DTF"
> 
> Too bad you are on the other side of the pond. You like to travel Dolly?
> 
> edit: wait, I keep remembering you are married woman - take it to your H!!


my H has moved out and we're getting divorced - none of this reconciliation nonsense for us. He walked out on 1 March and we're done, we're both fairly decisive ha ha


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## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

ah I see, I got that tone from your threads (that's how it was with my divorce too, reconciliation was never really on the table as much as I wanted it to be at first). I just didn't want to reinforce any sorts of hasty decisions on your part, thought it would be inappropriate to make such comments, But I guess it isn't so we can plan our rendezvous after all!


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## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

my perfect man - one that lives thousands of miles away


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## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

Dollystanford said:


> my perfect man - one that lives thousands of miles away


:rofl:


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## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

Baby I guess our love can never be, the universe just obviously won't allow it, we will just have to learn to settle for second best the rest of our lives


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## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

hey darling, we'll always have the internet! xx


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