# I am checked out



## a.mckay26 (Dec 16, 2010)

About 2 years ago my husband suffered a series of major nervous breakdowns. For a while he was in therapy and on medications to help with his mental health issues, but stopped about 6 months later. During that time our relationship changed. Instead of being a wife, I shifted into a caretaker/mom/nurse mode. I still love him deeply but not like a husband. I feel like he is a draining responsibility.

Fast forward to about 6 months ago, he is still suffering from mental health issues and he turns into an emotionally abusive person I don't recognize. I begged him for months to go back to the doctor with no luck. He became a huge jerk to me and my family and friends during that time.

About two weeks ago I threatened to leave if he didn't get help and change his ways. It totally scared him and now he is willing to do anything I ask. Now he is willing to do all the things I want. He is saying the right things, but honestly, it doesn't mean the same.

I want to give him one last chance before I call it quits but it is so hard to do. I am so checked out and I feel like I don't have the energy to give him anymore. We have been together since we were 16 and now we are 24. I have these feelings of "I don't want to waste any more time on him."

Any advice how I can try to check back in and give him one last chance?


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## Confus (Dec 17, 2010)

I completely and totally understand everything you're going through. "Nurse mode" is a phrase I've used often... any advice I gave would just be a projection from my own issues onto you. All I can say is I wish you the best of luck.


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## F-102 (Sep 15, 2010)

Actions speak louder than words, and this is one case where the actions may take a long time to "pump up the volume". Get some therapy for you, perhaps even couples counseling. Yes, he may very well have changed, but I wish you the patience and best of luck to see it through.


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