# My Train Wreck Relationship



## SilverStar831 (Aug 10, 2010)

Me and my fiance have been together for close to a year now. We have had a previous marriage that was led to a divorce due to youthful mistakes and infidelity on both of our parts.

I moved in with her about 10 months ago and everything was great. I stayed at her place, went to work, came home and spent time with her. She text alot then but it didn't bother me.

4 months ago the renters in a house I own moved out and we moved back in since her lease was up at the place she stayed. Her father had just recently passed so her mother moved in as well as to not be left alone in such a time.

My fiance's texting habits have grown worse. She texts this 1 guy all the time that she calls her best guy friend. She tells me not to worry that he is just a friend nothing more. However she doesn't want me to see what they talk about. Whenever she isn't texting him they are usually on Facebook talking. I brought the issue up and told her that this situation really bothers me and she just told me that I'm worrying over nothing and there's no reason to be jealous. She said that she knows alot of people with best friends of the opposite sex that aren't having affairs so whats there to worry about. I asked her why she can't talk to me like she does him and she told me she confides in him and that she can't talk to me about these things because I would get mad or jealous. 

We had a birthday for my fiance planned for this Friday. Her friends would all be there and all of my friends were coming. I expressed my discomfort that her guy friend be there because he seems to be having more of a relationship with her than I am able at this point. She flipped out and told me I can't pick and choose which of her friends can come. As a result she has told all of her friends the party is off. Her guy friend has a girlfriend she says, so I offered for us to all go on a double date and give me and him the oppurtunity to be friends. She refused quickly and told me I done screwed that chance up.

Things have exploded and she barely looks at me. When we do talk she usually brings up a mistake from the past and starts an argument.

Am i wrong to be jealous in this situation? I am really in a lot of heartache here looking at things how they are because we have 4 kids and I know they can see how unhappy things have become as well.


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## Chris Taylor (Jul 22, 2010)

Having a guy friend? No big deal.

Texting guy friend? No big deal.

Hiding the texts? Confiding in him about things she won't confide with you? A really big deal.

And now your the bad guy. I'm not surprised.

I guess if I was in your shoes I would have gone ahead with the party just to see how they interacted and got to know him. but that's water under the bridge now so the only thing you can do it to let your fiance know why you reacted the way that you did.


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## DawnD (Sep 23, 2009)

:iagree: with everything above.


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## Brewster 59 (Jun 19, 2010)

michzz said:


> You will notice by now that she is playing by the cheater's script.
> 
> 1. He's just a friend.
> 2. You're too controlling!
> ...


:iagree:


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