# I Can't Stop Overeating



## SeersTower (Jan 22, 2009)

I met my husband three years ago. Back then I was the healthy (for me) weight of 150 lbs. I'm 5'7" and a little on the large/ muscular side.

Since then, I've gained weight in the insidious, creeping style. At first I thought that my figure was just becoming more "womanly," but now I know that being around my husband has changed my eating patterns. He loves pizza, burgers, brownies, etc. I now weigh 163, which is not a tremendous weight gain, but I'm only 21 and the weight keeps coming on!

I've told my husband that I gain weight easily and that I am easily persuaded to eat just about anything at any time. He's naturally thin and doesn't seem to get it. He thinks I am beautiful and doesn't know why I am worrying so much. He got a gym membership recently and we've been going three times a week together, so the exercise is covered.

Here are my questions: How do I get my husband to take my distress seriously? How can I control myself to not eat whatever he's eating? How do I avoid eating when I'm not even hungry? How can I get him to eat healthier things when he's a meat-and-potatoes kinda guy?


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## wonder (Jun 30, 2008)

start buying healthier foods. if you cook, only cook healthy meals. he'll either eat it or fend for himself. if he brings home a pizza, go grab a small snack (fruit & yogurt is delicious). eventually he'll get the idea that you're serious


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## AnnaW (Feb 18, 2009)

I agree with what wonder said. I know you said that you are persuaded to eat almost anything so is it possible for you to make healthier versions at home of the foods both of you love? My husband is a junk food junkie too so I sympathize. And we have kids so I want them to see a better example of how to eat that what he is providing.

You didn't specify in your post but if you are eating take out a lot then just by simply making those same foods at home you are saving calories. I was shocked when I saw how many calories some of those foods have in restaurants. I don't know how they do it.


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## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

SeersTower said:


> Here are my questions: How do I get my husband to take my distress seriously? How can I control myself to not eat whatever he's eating? How do I avoid eating when I'm not even hungry? How can I get him to eat healthier things when he's a meat-and-potatoes kinda guy?


I gained a lot of weight when i was about your age, too. i am 5'7" and i topped out at 170lbs i think. im now down to 125. 

I lived with a sister who also loved junk food. She didnt listen to me when i asked her not to buy it. so you know what i started doing, i threw it away. the moment i saw it, i chucked it. It pissed her off a lot, but she stopped buying it, or at least she hid it from me. I told her if i see im throwing it away so if shes going to buy it she better hide it. she got really mad at me, but you know what i lost all the weight and she is now over 200lbs.


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## bhappy3 (Feb 4, 2008)

If you love eating, you better love exercising, or you're going to gain weight forever. Run. Start running, and don't stop. It's the best calorie burning exercise. 

Think about what the overeating is doing for you, and not only the overeating, but the things you are eating. I know the only thing you can see on the outside is the weight gain, but think about what's going on on the inside... cholesterol for one. 

When you eat right and exercise, your body can function optimally. When you eat poorly and lead a sedentary lifestyle, you're setting yourself up for many many health problems down the road. You're still young, but it's just like planning for retirement... save now and have a good retirement. Eat well and exercise now so you can enjoy your old age free from diseases and pills and constant doctor visits, etc. 

How do you stop eating what he's eating? Change your thinking about the food he's eating. It's gross... it's not good for you, think about it that way. Sure, it tastes good, but use it solely as a treat, once/week TOPS! Have you seen the movie "Supersize Me"? I haven't eaten at McD's since, and will not. 

Soda is bad for you, diet or regular. If it comes from a plant, it's good for you. Join a diet club, a free one if you can. Talk to the fitness attendant at your gym to get a workout plan. I could talk forever about it. 

Best of luck. =)


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

All great advice above...

I am a bit of a work out freeak myself and want to stay thin.

You need to eat 6-8 meals a day, small ones not three or two big ones. America's biggest issue is we eat 1 or 2 meals a day but they are HUGE. 

Don't eat 3 slices of Pizza, eat 1 and a salad, Drink water.

When you get a burger, Drink water, don't eat the fries.

No dessert, right after eating, but maybe a small bowl of ice cream 2 hours later.

Since you just joined a gym, it will take a while to "slim down" I HIGHLY recommend you buy the book, "The new rules of lifting for women" by Alan Cogsgrove (sp?) any book decent store should have it. Follow those routines.

you don't have to eat nuts all day long and work out 5 hours to look good.

good solid eating habits, and a good mix of exercise will do the trick. You can really eat what ever you want, just eat in moderation and try to cut out the commercial junk food.

Throw away the scale...Look in the mirror...go for mirror results not weight scale results.


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## Veronica Jackson (Jul 2, 2008)

I began overeating when my husband told me to stop losing weight. I became very thin before Christmas and when I lost my "T&A" it was the last straw.

I needed to find a way to gain weight so I started eating at night to put some weight on. I succeeded, now my pants are tight. I can't do the yo-yo diet.

Right now getting fit will get back in shape, I have a gallon of water with me constantly and I put dance music on when I'm hanging out in the house so that I can get the blood flowing. I have to re-brainwash myself.

Its getting tough these days because my husband quit smoking and is now overeating.

The rules I set for myself are:

truly believe that lettuce is a natural filler.

Do not eat after 7pm

Eat breakfast.

Keep my water next to me, when I feel like having a piece of cake. Drink water.

Junk food will always be around I have to look at it as if its a pound of cellulite instead of a tasty snack. I make it unattractive.


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## bhappy3 (Feb 4, 2008)

Read labels... do you know what a serving size of ice cream is? It's a half cup... measure it out. Actually, measure less. Put it in a bowl, put the container back in the freezer. Same with anything else you eat... measure out just a tad less than what the actual serving size is. 

Don't do anything else when you eat. Only eat. Don't read or watch tv, you won't think about what you're eating and tend to eat more. 

Buy smaller plates, I think they're called lunch plates, it will look like your plate is full and you'll have less food on it. 

Get measured at the gym now so you can track your progress. Set SMALL goals. Don't look at the big picture (OMG I have 40 pounds to lose), look at small goals (in the next two weeks I want to lose three pounds). Or if that's too big of a goal, set daily goals (today I'm going to walk on the treadmill and get my heartrate up to X {ask the attendant at the gym for help with how high you can safely go} for 20 minutes, or burn off X calories, or walk X miles in Y minutes). 

I just started running. When I get on the track, I know how many laps I want to run... I count down the laps instead of up. Somehow that makes it easier. I also look up when I run, not down... down is depressing and will have that effect on your body... looking up will open up your chest and allow you to breathe easier. 

Kudos Chikki about all of it, but I really like the last line about "making it unattractive". 

Best of luck. We're all here for you with more advice than you could ever use. Start slow and work your way to fit, but you got to start. =)


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## Deejo (May 20, 2008)

I have been into fitness and nutrition for a very long time. I could post a novel on this subject. The advice you have gotten is all great, it is all correct, it is all positive.

I'm going to tell you what I see, more than what I think:

For many people, eating is an absolutley passive activity. They simply do not think about what it is they are putting in their mouth. 

Most people are reactive rather than proactive about their health. Exercise and diet becomes a reaction to an existing issue (obesity, cardiovascular health, etc.) instead of a proactive means of _avoiding those issues in the first place. _

We live in a culture that will make you fat if you choose to be disengaged about what you eat or performing exercise.

There is no magic bullet. There is no secret. Eat less. Eat better. Exercise 20-30 minutes a day and you will be blown away at the degree of control you have over how you look and feel for the rest of your life.

There is a women's fit mag called Oxygen, I think it is one of the better ones out there.


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## sarah.rslp (Jan 2, 2009)

SeersTower said:


> Since then, I've gained weight in the insidious, creeping style. At first I thought that my figure was just becoming more "womanly," but now I know that being around my husband has changed my eating patterns. He loves pizza, burgers, brownies, etc. I now weigh 163, which is not a tremendous weight gain, but I'm only 21 and the weight keeps coming on!
> 
> I've told my husband that I gain weight easily and that I am easily persuaded to eat just about anything at any time. He's naturally thin and doesn't seem to get it. He thinks I am beautiful and doesn't know why I am worrying so much. He got a gym membership recently and we've been going three times a week together, so the exercise is covered.


I really wouldn't assume that you've got the exercise aspect covered. Exercising with your SO is not a good idea I've always found that it kills motivation and just stops you developing a challanging work out routine. 

Just because you're going to the gym 3 times a week doesn't mean that you're working out properly, you need to make an honest assesment of how much you're actually achieving during those session.

I think you need to look at yourself rather than your husband, if you can't eat certain foods well it's up to you to avoid them, it's not really fair to thrown the onus onto your husband.


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## bhappy3 (Feb 4, 2008)

Deejo said:


> I have been into fitness and nutrition for a very long time. I could post a novel on this subject. The advice you have gotten is all great, it is all correct, it is all positive.
> 
> I'm going to tell you what I see, more than what I think:
> 
> ...


Very well said. Oxygen is AWESOME (just tear out all the ads). =)


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## snix11 (Sep 25, 2008)

I bought this software called diet power. you record EVERYTHING you eat in it. actually works, i've lost 45 lbs in three months.


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## Leahdorus (Jul 28, 2008)

I've used a free site called The Daily Plate (Calorie Counter, Diet Tracking, Food Journal, Nutrition Facts at The Daily Plate) and it's been hugely helping in counting calories and seeing what I eat.


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## StrongEnough (Nov 25, 2008)

bhappy3 said:


> Read labels... do you know what a serving size of ice cream is? It's a half cup... measure it out. Actually, measure less. Put it in a bowl, put the container back in the freezer. Same with anything else you eat... measure out just a tad less than what the actual serving size is.
> 
> Don't do anything else when you eat. Only eat. Don't read or watch tv, you won't think about what you're eating and tend to eat more.
> 
> ...


I run marathons and I too count backwards on my laps. For some strange reason it seems easier! I thought I was the only one who did this. Thanks for making me feel like I am not the only one who counts down when I run.


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## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

StrongEnough said:


> I run marathons and I too count backwards on my laps. For some strange reason it seems easier! I thought I was the only one who did this. Thanks for making me feel like I am not the only one who counts down when I run.


I actually count up until i get half way, and then start counting down.


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## Jen (Feb 26, 2009)

I don't think it's fair to make your husband responsible for your weight gain. It is your choice to eat or not eat, to eat healthy or eat junk. I understand that it's hard to resist if he's right there eating a brownie, but ultimately it's YOUR decision. If you need to eat something, pick up a carrot. Eat one cookie instead of 6. Eat 1/4 of a piece of cake instead of the whole thing. Eat what you want at times, but eat LESS of it, and only cook healthy meals. Chew sugarfree gum if you need to distract yourself. Go for walks in the evenings, even on days you work out. Basically, eat less and move more. But I don't think it's fair to say it's your husband's fault because of what he eats or because he doesn't understand what you're going through.


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## Kyle (Feb 26, 2009)

IT IS HARD!

Eating food is pleasurable. Its like saying 'don't have sex' when your partner is right there and willing. - its pretty darn difficult! 


Its good that you mentioned your 21. A thing I noticed when I studied up on diets and fitness, etc... is that they rarley mention one thing. 

Up until the age about 20years your body is still growing. Before this age you need alot of food so thats why teenagers and kids can eat a fair amount of junk food and not get fat.(although now'a'days they are exceeding even that amount!). 
WAY too many people after the age of 20 keep the same diet they had at 18 and 19, then they blimp out! 
Anyway, thats just a piece of information I thought I should share. So if you have friends that are around the 20 years hump make sure to let them know. 

As for the diet stuff, everyones given great advice so heres mine:
Do not eat before you go to sleep. I like to give about 3 hours after a light meal before I sleep, and eat less. I know it tastes good and you want one more slice but try not too. 

Gym membership is good. The best way to get rid of fat(that I've read) is cardio. Treadmill or bike is good and make sure it has music or a tv or it gets really boring and people slowly stop doing their cardio. 


If you are unable to stop overeating and keep eating excessive bad foods then I suggest you get a friend to control what you eat. If someone else is serving you and when you ask for more and they say NO then thats final. This usually works but it can be tough to find someone to do this and make sure you don't go on a binge.
Ask your husband to control what you eat if hes up to it. If he can eat all the fatty foods then thats up to him, as long as he makes sure you eat something healthy.


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## MsLady (Dec 1, 2008)

I think your only solutions are 1) throw it away as soon as you find it ... he'll then get it that you are serious and 2) keep talking to him in an earnest way about how this food is unhealthy for you and you are gaining weight ... he may think it's not big deal now, but what will he think when you inch toward 200?

The other aspect of this is that he may be naturally thin now, but that way of eating will catch up with him eventually as well.

I feel for you and know how hard it is to stay slim and in shape when you have a husband that tempts you with food.


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