# A Pedi, Jeans, and Romance



## Maneo (Dec 4, 2012)

It's simple, little things that count. Like me complimenting my wife for all she does for our baby and me and suggesting she indulge herself with a pedi. 
And she asking me if I have a preference for color. 
And I say she can surprise me. 
And she gets her pedi in deep, rich pink knowing I adore that color on her toes. 
And I help out with extra hands on chores she is doing around the house. 
And she goes about the house in jeans and barefoot so I can appreciate her pedi. 
And that night, watching TV, I give her a long foot massage that ends with a slow fingertip caress of her feet and ankles and calves until she suggests between soft giggles that we adjourn to the bedroom. 
Simple things.


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

Maneo said:


> It's simple, little things that count. Like me complimenting my wife for all she does for our baby and me and suggesting she indulge herself with a pedi.
> And she asking me if I have a preference for color.
> And I say she can surprise me.
> And she gets her pedi in deep, rich pink knowing I adore that color on her toes.
> ...


Just wait until she is 40. All that crap flies out the window.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Young at Heart (Jan 6, 2015)

Maneo said:


> It's simple, little things that count. Like me complimenting my wife for all she does for our baby and me and suggesting she indulge herself with a pedi.
> ...And I help out with extra hands on chores she is doing around the house.
> And she goes about the house in jeans and barefoot so I can appreciate her pedi.
> And that night, watching TV, I give her a long foot massage that ends with a slow fingertip caress of her feet and ankles and calves until she suggests between soft giggles that we adjourn to the bedroom...


Good for you. It is clear to your W and mother of your child that you are trying. That means a lot.

May I suggest you get the book 5 Lanuages of Love by Dr. Chapman. Learn about what it really is that makes your wife feel special and loved. Then make sure you make her feel loved in HER love languages. That will keep the spark in your marriage. 

For way too long I didn't know my wife's love languages and so not only did I not focus on making her feel loved, the way I expressed my love for her did little for her. Actually since I didn't know when she was expressing her love for me, I did some things that hurt her badly. The 5 Languages of Love was a real eye-opener that changed my marriage.


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

Young at Heart said:


> Good for you. It is clear to your W and mother of your child that you are trying. That means a lot.
> 
> May I suggest you get the book 5 Lanuages of Love by Dr. Chapman. Learn about what it really is that makes your wife feel special and loved. Then make sure you make her feel loved in HER love languages. That will keep the spark in your marriage.
> 
> For way too long I didn't know my wife's love languages and so not only did I not focus on making her feel loved, the way I expressed my love for her did little for her. Actually since I didn't know when she was expressing her love for me, I did some things that hurt her badly. The 5 Languages of Love was a real eye-opener that changed my marriage.


Very good book indeed, but it only works if both read it and APPLY it.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## cent130130 (Nov 6, 2011)

You're a lucky man...your wife gets it.


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## T&T (Nov 16, 2012)

Thound said:


> Just wait until she is 40. All that crap flies out the window.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Thound,

Why do you say that? What does turning 40 have to do with anything? :scratchhead:


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## Green Eyes (Nov 20, 2014)

T&T said:


> Thound,
> 
> Why do you say that? What does turning 40 have to do with anything? :scratchhead:


I second that question.


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## Green Eyes (Nov 20, 2014)

I agree Maneo, the little day-to-day considerations for each other go a long way in making each other feel loved and connected.


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## Holland (Aug 20, 2012)

Good on you OP, enjoy and be happy 

As for the 40 year old comment, well BOTH men and women can stop making an effort, it has nothing to do with gender.


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

Holland said:


> Good on you OP, enjoy and be happy
> 
> As for the 40 year old comment, well BOTH men and women can stop making an effort, it has nothing to do with gender.


It has nothing to do with effort. When women get around 40 they start going thru the change. When their hormones start going haywire she will lose that lovey dovey feeling, and it wont matter how many flowers you buy or how much butt you kiss. I realize I paint with a broad brush, but I have seen it time and time again. My older coworkers warned me when I was young, and I thought they were full of it. They were not BSing.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

Having said that above, keep showing your wife love and affection. Just dont be surprised later on down the road when it is not returned.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Green Eyes (Nov 20, 2014)

Thound, I'm sorry that that's been your experience. You're right in that you paint with a broad brush. I'm 47 and am actually more "lovey dovey" than when I was much younger. I mean both in terms of being sweet and considerate to my husband as well as sexually. I think I was more hormonally messed up when I was younger


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## happy as a clam (Jan 5, 2014)

I'm 49 and more lovey-dovey than ever. And yes, I am going through the change as well. There's no doubt, the hormonal shifts can be rough, but it hasn't lessened those loving feelings one bit.


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## Gob Bluth (Jul 12, 2010)

Maneo said:


> It's simple, little things that count. Like me complimenting my wife for all she does for our baby and me and suggesting she indulge herself with a pedi.
> And she asking me if I have a preference for color.
> And I say she can surprise me.
> And she gets her pedi in deep, rich pink knowing I adore that color on her toes.
> ...



The soft giggles is the best. Well done!


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## Holland (Aug 20, 2012)

Well I have just turned 48 (yeah right inbetween GE's and Happy lol) and I am seriously lovey dovey, more romantic than I ever was when younger. I keep myself in OK condition, gym, personal trainer, manicures, pedi's, facials. Wear clothes that compliment my curves.

I would say that well over 95% of my females friends and family are similar in that they take care of themselves and are happy. loving women.


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

Holland said:


> Well I have just turned 48 (yeah right inbetween GE's and Happy lol) and I am seriously lovey dovey, more romantic than I ever was when younger. I keep myself in OK condition, gym, personal trainer, manicures, pedi's, facials. Wear clothes that compliment my curves.
> 
> I would say that well over 95% of my females friends and family are similar in that they take care of themselves and are happy. loving women.


How long have you been married?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Holland (Aug 20, 2012)

Mr H and I are not legally married, we are defacto. Been together for 3 years.

But I was with my ex for 20 years and did all of the above. He was the one that was LD but it was only the last 12 months where I would not have had sex with him to save my life. Even so I still looked after myself for me.


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

I have been married 32 years and when you add menopause to the equation lovey dovey flew out the window years ago. It happens. It takes work to keep the spark. Im willing. My wife, not so much. I thinks its just the nature of LTR and sadly aging. Its unfair we have money and time alone to do things, but she really doesnt want to. Hijack over.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Holland (Aug 20, 2012)

I'm sorry to hear that Thound. IMHO it has more to do with attitude than age. As I said I am surrounded by women that do take care and that do enjoy life, love, sex.
Even my dads partner who is 70 takes great care of herself and they have a regular (albeit lesser frequency these days) sex life.

I am just a person that refuses to waste life.


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## justfabulous (Feb 9, 2014)

Thound said:


> Just wait until she is 40. All that crap flies out the window.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_



That's just not an accurate statement. Like someone else said, perhaps that's been your experience, but by no means can you make a blanket statement like that. I just have to speak up on this, 'cuz you might freak some folks out, quite unnecessarily. I'm mid 40s, met my husband when I was 17, been married since I was 25. We are just as playful, flirtatious, erotic, romantic, and passionate as we were when we met at 17 - in fact more so, since I am much free-er and less inhibited than I was as a 17 year old Catholic school girl (a 'good girl' who he worked very hard to corrupt. We are probably at our most sexual right now (and we were always pretty sexual!). Women generally hit their sexual peak in their 30s, and many ride that wave well into their 40s. Other ladies have validated that in this thread, so I'm clearly not an anomaly. There are plenty of instances in the threads here at TAM of women who become more sexual and fun-loving in their 40s than they have every been. My husband and I are having the time of our lives together in our mid 40s. We have both said we feel like we have fallen in love with each other all over again. We dont just "love eachother", we're 'in love', and enjoying all that comes with that. We may be mid 40s, but we feel (and act), like we are still 17. In fact, my husband likes to say to me, "Its like we're 17 again - only better", and its true. All I'm saying is please dont paint everyone with the same brush. Its not an age thing, its an individual thing. In my 20s I had girl friends who were stone cold towards their husbands. Like I said, its not about the age, its about the individual.


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