# My job



## Bigwayneo (Jan 22, 2011)

I think I might end up quiting my job. I work as a night auditor at a large waterpark/hotel. I warned them I would like to switch to days, (getting my kids into daycare)and at first they said they understood. Then I get a huge guilt trip E-mail from the Manager that does the schdules stating that she needs me for at least a month and a half. I warned her I would try, but there is no way I would be 100%. I find my self getting worse every night I work. Calling or texting the neighbors to check the street and parking lot for his car, and my brother to do a drive by for me (he is a great brother), checking E-mails, facebook, and our phone records (att updates every other day or sooner).... is this normal? I am sure i can find another job, (Not to mention work more often at my hobbie job at gamestop)....I assume this is normal, or at least I hope. Everything they did (for the most part) I was at work. With the exception of my birthday night, and that was flirting (at worst). My employeer has been good to me, but it is stressing me out.


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## Eli-Zor (Nov 14, 2010)

I agree move jobs and get yourself on the same day routine, it will help your family work life balance.


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## Bigwayneo (Jan 22, 2011)

Thanks Eli-Zor. How should I break it to them with out being the an *******? I know they need me a lot right now, but as I said, I am barley giving them half of what I used to produce.


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## DanF (Sep 27, 2010)

Bigwayneo, if you are a valued employee, your boss will do what's needed to accommodate you and keep you on.
If not, well maybe you need to move on.

Just remember that jobs are scarce in the US right now. It may be harder than you think to find another one.
Good luck.


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## Bigwayneo (Jan 22, 2011)

True DanF. They said they would find me help me find another postion within the hotel, but as soon as my direct schedule manager heard about everything she went nutz and pretty much muted me on the subject. I think I will send her E-mail asking what the status is of her hiring another Night Audit so I can move on to days.


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## Powerbane (Nov 8, 2010)

If she goes too nuts - take it to HR and have them help you.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

Wayn,
1st of all you are not nuts, even thought my wife was bringing home her reciepts for her drawer I still felt the need to drive out to her work.
Even though I had her password and can check her account any time, I felt the need to sign on and check every hour.
Even thought she gave me a ton affection I still need those calls(3 to 4 a shift) at work to reassure me where she was at and what she was doing.

Its been a year and I still sign in to her accounts but it happens once or twice aweek. I still like to her from her at least twice during my shift. I still take her reciepts, I just read them less, mainly when she gets home a little later then usual.

Even though every thing continues to check out and we spend every waking minute together I still find the need to verify.

As far as work goes, yes right now is very important, it wont take much for a trigger. You need to be together as much as possible. 
It took my wife awhile but she finaly got off the closing shift as a bartender and is now opening. 

I can totaly get where you are coming from, there is nothing worse then going thru this crap and having a spouse working to 2:00 AM at a bar no less. 

So good luck and stay with in the hotal and get a shift change that is your best bet. Your other option is to start sending out resume' and hope you get the AM shift. If you think about it the new guy always gets the night shift.

I hate to us the word paraniod but its up to your wife to make that go away.

As crazy at it sound set up some "comfort zones" like for me when I started going crazy... I could always rely on that reciept from her drawer verifing when she got to work and when she left work. Maybe for you some security cameras around the house, or VAR in her car. I'm just thinking out side the box for some way you and her can raise your comfort level.

One thing for sure and it is relitively easy and that is the phone calls. Staying in contact through out the shift will help. Especialy if she's the one making the calling.


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## Bigwayneo (Jan 22, 2011)

Well, really good news for once. The hotel finaly hired (promoted) someone to take my spot. Next week will be my last week, at least for the Aduits. They are searching for a day (trying for the same shifts as the wife) spot for me. They also said if I ever feel comfortable with working nights again to let them know and I can always get shifts during the night back. It will be nice to be home during the weekend nights (and what ever random couple weekday nights I was needed). In all honesty this job probably did not help my relationship one bit anyway.

*The guy-On a good night, tonight and last night, she has been texting me (calling is hoard when working at a hotel.) and asking to make sure I am doing alright.


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## Bigwayneo (Jan 22, 2011)

I will never get to get that much information as you did. The only thing I found was when, and how often they texted. I called the phone company and of course they can not send me a record on what the texting was about. The OM, (ex-best friend) hates the internet, and I check my computer history all the time (even the stuff she has not idea how to delete) so I know the never talk via internet. We do not have internet on our phones either, so she/he could have never used that as well. So in a way, its both a good and bad thing. She has told me what a lot of the messages said, (and a friend that got a hold of the OMs cell and gave me some examples before he deleted them as well) but says she can not remember the majority. Which makes sense considering when they did text (which was only 4-5 days during the month of the affair) they did text a lot. 

And the trickle truth comes in this as well, she seems to remember a text here and there when something seems to spark with her. An example would be like my thread "Ex-best friend is a wolf", we were talking about if he was trying to get with her for hole long (months, since he moved in?) because of the way he treated me, and talked to her. Just to find out that in a text he had it in for her for almost 8 years.........I am pretty sure he was just waiting for me to slip up and tell her everything she wanted to here, he is a master at that.


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