# Me Too



## PFTGuy (Aug 28, 2011)

As a new member of the forum, I thought I'd cast my voice out there in support of those who are struggling with addictions. I don't know why I have these nagging problems, for sure, but there are the usual suspects; physical and emotional abuse during childhood, inappropriate physical contact with adults, exposure to pornography, and parents with their own addictions and psychological problems.

I've been able to function fairly well in most areas of life, holding good steady jobs and keeping the bills paid, but clearly I've not been the best man or parent I could have been. Marriage difficulties compound the problem, maybe but don't excuse the behaviors. Somehow I feel like it's like being stuck at the bottom of a muddy valley and being unable to claw my way out into the sunlight without sliding back down. Particularly pernicious is porn addiction, because of its appeal to natural needs and easy availability on the Internet. I feel much empathy for women who post here about their husbands with this problem, but don't know how to suggest a solution...the desire to change has to come from within them. All you can do is state your boundaries and hold true to them.

Boundaries should be reasonable, though. Even my posting here would be, to my wife, out of bounds.

I hope I will be able to offer a word of encouragement here and there, and receive the same, among those struggling to live cleaner, healthier lives.


----------



## southern wife (Jul 22, 2011)

PFTGuy said:


> As a new member of the forum, I thought I'd cast my voice out there in support of those who are struggling with addictions. I don't know why I have these nagging problems, for sure, but there are the usual suspects; physical and emotional abuse during childhood, inappropriate physical contact with adults, exposure to pornography, and parents with their own addictions and psychological problems.
> 
> I've been able to function fairly well in most areas of life, holding good steady jobs and keeping the bills paid, but clearly I've not been the best man or parent I could have been. Marriage difficulties compound the problem, maybe but don't excuse the behaviors. Somehow I feel like it's like being stuck at the bottom of a muddy valley and being unable to claw my way out into the sunlight without sliding back down. Particularly pernicious is porn addiction, because of its appeal to natural needs and easy availability on the Internet. I feel much empathy for women who post here about their husbands with this problem, but don't know how to suggest a solution...the desire to change has to come from within them. All you can do is state your boundaries and hold true to them.
> 
> ...


Why would your wife view you posting here as out of bounds? There's no porn here.


----------



## PFTGuy (Aug 28, 2011)

southern wife said:


> Why would your wife view you posting here as out of bounds? There's no porn here.


:scratchhead:Can't give a rational reason...just some stew of fears and anxieties. For my part, I'm on the Internet, a few minutes alone, weeks without "intimacy" as she calls it, and 5 days without a drink. 

One day at a time? Sigh. It's so easy to rationalize...I deserve to have some fun, right?


----------

