# The Idiot Ex Husband and tax refund



## AppleDucklings (Mar 27, 2011)

I was filing my taxes last week, and it was rejected because it turns out the ex husband claimed the kids on his taxes, which is a no-no for him, because our divorce says he does not get to claim the kids on his taxes. So, I had to remove the kids from mine in order to re-file, and now I have to file an amended tax refund. Well, I called him out on it. A few days later, he called me up almost begging me to not file the amended on him if he were to pay me the money I lost. I said why should I do you any favors, I don't trust you. After everything you put me through, you want me to do you a favor? I said not only do you now owe me $800 for what I lost by you taking the kids on the taxes but you also owe me $300 for a car and another $400 for a gas and electric bill you ran up when you spent our family money on Slvtty McSlvtbucket instead of paying family bills, and in the past 8 months since our divorce, I have not seen a dime from you, why the hell would I trust you to simply pay me what I lost when you unrightfully claimed what was mine on your taxes?

He says he will give me $1600 in cash in 3 weeks time. I agreed to give him 3 weeks to give me that money before I file the amended refund and let his ass get in trouble. I have the court order that proves he cannot claim those kids. I hate that I feel like I am doing his sorry ass a favor. I should just let him burn.


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## DubeGechi (Dec 12, 2010)

A big No No on letting him filing with the kids. Absolutely not. Legal complicacies may come about with the kids and will be bigger than the dollars.


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## AppleDucklings (Mar 27, 2011)

DubeGechi said:


> A big No No on letting him filing with the kids. Absolutely not. Legal complicacies may come about with the kids and will be bigger than the dollars.


I did not just "let him" file with the kids. He went and did that himself under my nose. I only found out after my refund was rejected.


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## golfergirl (Dec 8, 2010)

AppleDucklings said:


> I did not just "let him" file with the kids. He went and did that himself under my nose. I only found out after my refund was rejected.


If agreement says you can't then don't. You don't f**k with the tax man!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Eli-Zor (Nov 14, 2010)

I would refile and let him explain his deception to the taxman. The extra money is not worth it especialy since he may not pay you . Let the tax man deal with him .
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## AppleDucklings (Mar 27, 2011)

Eli-Zor said:


> I would refile and let him explain his deception to the taxman. The extra money is not worth it especialy since he may not pay you . Let the tax man deal with him .
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


He told me he went back to the place where he filed his taxes and told them he "accidentally" filed with the kids because he "misunderstood" how taxes work now that he's no longer married *cough cough, bullshiit* He says that they told him if I would agree to just let him pay me the money loss, then no amended would need to be filed and he could avoid trouble.


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## golfergirl (Dec 8, 2010)

Eli-Zor said:


> I would refile and let him explain his deception to the taxman. The extra money is not worth it especialy since he may not pay you . Let the tax man deal with him .
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


It might even be to get you for filing false claim. Why would you 
A) trust him 
B) help him by lying
You have nothing to gain other than deception and breaking even.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## golfergirl (Dec 8, 2010)

AppleDucklings said:


> He told me he went back to the place where he filed his taxes and told them he "accidentally" filed with the kids because he "misunderstood" how taxes work now that he's no longer married *cough cough, bullshiit* He says that they told him if I would agree to just let him pay me the money loss, then no amended would need to be filed and he could avoid trouble.


And you believe him because he's always been stand up, up front and honest with you? Never know could be a set up.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## AppleDucklings (Mar 27, 2011)

golfergirl said:


> It might even be to get you for filing false claim. Why would you
> A) trust him
> B) help him by lying
> You have nothing to gain other than deception and breaking even.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Hmmm, a thought to ponder.

You're right. I should just file the amended anyways. I have the legal rights to the kids, not him. I have the court papers that proves this.


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## AppleDucklings (Mar 27, 2011)

golfergirl said:


> And you believe him because he's always been stand up, up front and honest with you? Never know could be a set up.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I don't trust him at all.


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## morituri (Apr 1, 2011)

What your ex-H has done is tax fraud and you should report it to the IRS so they can do an audit and nail his slimy a$$.


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## Lone Star (Feb 2, 2012)

File as you are suppose to. You have the legal documents to prove that the children are to be claimed by you. He knowingly filed a false tax return, that is his problem, not yours.


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

I realize you're trying to keep things civil for the kids' sake. You have a good heart for even considering this in spite of all he's done to you. It could lead you into trouble. Just a warning: Do not EVER [email protected] with Uncle Sam's money (the money EH owes Uncle Sam). Let him deal with the IRS. It's all about consequences - which he's trying to avoid yet again. He knew full well what he was doing, he just wanted to see if he could get away with it by once again counting on your kind heart.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

AppleDucklings said:


> He told me he went back to the place where he filed his taxes and told them he "accidentally" filed with the kids because he "misunderstood" how taxes work now that he's no longer married *cough cough, bullshiit* He says that they told him if I would agree to just let him pay me the money loss, then no amended would need to be filed and he could avoid trouble.


:lol: Riiiight.

What a douche.

My ex did that one year. I had to pay but made him pay me. 

Since I have our daughter full time now, he won't claim her...and if he tries, I'll take his loser butt to court. (We have no legal papers drawn up). However, COMMON SENSE would say that the parent paying 100% for things all year should claim the child. Duh. But....you never know with people. Hopefully he realizes this (since he's homeless without a job anyway) and doesn't try to pull anything shady.

HA! Sorry for the rant! But I completely empathize!


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

AppleDucklings said:


> Hmmm, a thought to ponder.
> 
> You're right. I should just file the amended anyways. I have the legal rights to the kids, not him. I have the court papers that proves this.


:smthumbup:

This is the beauty of breakup. You don't have to protect him or give a shet anymore. Take care of you.


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## AppleDucklings (Mar 27, 2011)

lordmayhem said:


> I realize you're trying to keep things civil for the kids' sake. You have a good heart for even considering this in spite of all he's done to you. It could lead you into trouble. Just a warning: Do not EVER [email protected] with Uncle Sam's money (the money EH owes Uncle Sam). Let him deal with the IRS. It's all about consequences - which he's trying to avoid yet again. He knew full well what he was doing, he just wanted to see if he could get away with it by once again counting on your kind heart.


You all are right. I'm doing it, I'm filing the amended anyways. I have nothing to lose. I have the legal rights to claim the kids, not him.

Fvck him.


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## 2nd_t!me iz_best (Feb 28, 2011)

AppleDucklings said:


> You all are right. I'm doing it, I'm filing the amended anyways. I have nothing to lose. I have the legal rights to claim the kids, not him.
> 
> Fvck him.


good, this is the attitude to have after everything.
let his azz explain to the irs.
you owe him nothing except getting along as far as the kids are concerned.


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## F-102 (Sep 15, 2010)

And next time he calls, play the Beatles "Taxman" to him!


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## 2nd_t!me iz_best (Feb 28, 2011)

F-102 said:


> And next time he calls, play the Beatles "Taxman" to him!


:rofl:


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## hookares (Dec 7, 2011)

AppleDucklings, you already made one big mistake by hooking up with him in the first place. Don't make another.
If you permit him to use the deduction for this past year, he will likely keep on doing it and your not bringing it to the "good guys" at the IRS can be considered "collusion" if you don't report it right away.
He's already with MacSlvt, so why not let him enjoy ALL the fruits of his decision making?


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## golfergirl (Dec 8, 2010)

AppleDucklings said:


> You all are right. I'm doing it, I'm filing the amended anyways. I have nothing to lose. I have the legal rights to claim the kids, not him.
> 
> Fvck him.


Good job - doesn't that feel better.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ing (Mar 26, 2011)

Hey Apple! I think I was married to his sister! She did exactly the same thing.I called the tax department and they said that i claim as per normal since I was telling the truth. Let them deal with it. Its there job, and sometimes they surely do love their job.

Jeez. Truth is such a pain to these people!


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## Saffron (Mar 7, 2010)

AppleDucklings said:


> He told me he went back to the place where he filed his taxes and told them he "accidentally" filed with the kids because he "misunderstood" how taxes work now that he's no longer married *cough cough, bullshiit* *He says that they told him if I would agree to just let him pay me the money loss, then no amended would need to be filed and he could avoid trouble*.


I'm glad you decided to go ahead and file the amended! Unless you confirmed it with your own tax people, how do you know what he "found out" is the truth? Better to protect yourself and do what is in your best interest. Screw 'em!


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## AppleDucklings (Mar 27, 2011)

Also notice how he says *he* can avoid trouble if I do not file the amended.....now this may sound vengeful and spiteful of me but when did he ever stop to think about my feelings about anything when he was running around, cheating on me and making my life hell? And now he wants me to do him a favor??

What a piece of work that man is.


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## 2nd_t!me iz_best (Feb 28, 2011)

AppleDucklings said:


> Also notice how he says *he* can avoid trouble if I do not file the amended.....now this may sound vengeful and spiteful of me but when did he ever stop to think about my feelings about anything when he was running around, cheating on me and making my life hell? And now he wants me to do him a favor??
> 
> What a piece of work that man is.


i agree.
you do what you need to to take care of yourself and children.
let his trash worry about him.
oh, and you give him the benefit of calling him a man?


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## Lazarus (Jan 17, 2011)

Apple:
Folks here are right. File the amended anyways. By the time it is processed, hopefully it will exceed the 3 week period. Maybe he'll have given you the money (ha!) and when the rebate does come through... for the first time in his life you will have duped him and won!

Time to turn the tables. Your douche of an ex has won too many times. 

Remember, his actions put you and your kids through hell and in a situation where you faced being potentially homeless. And it seems he is still at his games, post divorce!


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## AppleDucklings (Mar 27, 2011)

2nd_t!me iz_best said:


> i agree.
> you do what you need to to take care of yourself and children.
> let his trash worry about him.
> oh, and you give him the benefit of calling him a man?


ugh...Sorry, I meant the Asshat.


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## AppleDucklings (Mar 27, 2011)

Lazarus said:


> Apple:
> Folks here are right. File the amended anyways. By the time it is processed, hopefully it will exceed the 3 week period. Maybe he'll have given you the money (ha!) and when the rebate does come through... for the first time in his life you will have duped him and won!
> 
> Time to turn the tables. Your douche of an ex has won too many times.
> ...


The thought did cross my mind.


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## TDSC60 (Dec 8, 2011)

AD,

I usually avoid any thing that resembles legal advice. But - as an Ex employee of the US Gov, please know this. A tax return is a legal document. When you sign it you are basically attesting that it is true and accurate in every way. If Hubbies tax return goes through unchallenged and you do not take the kids as a deduction on YOUR return, you are attesting to the fact that he is entitled to the deductions. Big trouble in coming years for you both. Plus, a slick lawyer can revisit the legal settlement of the divorce because you are now saying that he provided enough financial support for the kids to legally claim them as a deduction in writing to the IRS. If you file and sign your return without taking the kids as deductions, it is the same as swearing under oath that you are not entitled to do so.

Do not fall for the cash in hand method. You are asking for more trouble than you know.


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## 2nd_t!me iz_best (Feb 28, 2011)

Lazarus said:


> Apple:
> Folks here are right. File the amended anyways. By the time it is processed, hopefully it will exceed the 3 week period. Maybe he'll have given you the money (ha!) and when the rebate does come through... for the first time in his life you will have duped him and won!


true.

you did say he owes you other money too.

dont tell him you re-filed.

if he does pay you and you get your refund, you havent stolen from him.
just got some of the money he owes you already.


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## AppleDucklings (Mar 27, 2011)

Thanks all. I'm doing the amended first thing Monday morning.

It is also in our divorce papers that he owes me money for a car and for a past bill. Those are court-ordered debts he owes me.


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## OKnotokay (Jan 19, 2012)

I had a similar situation with my ex - if he made a "honest" error it should not be difficult for him to file an amended / corrected return. If he self-reports and corrects he just has to pay the difference in taxes due on or before April 15th. The end, no complications for either of you from Uncle Sam.

File your return claiming the children and enclose a copy of the custody agmt / divorce with your return. You should also send a registered ltr to your ex telling him about his error and inform him in writing that you'll be taking the deduction you are entitled to and informing him tha you expect him to make arrangements forcovering back child support/debt/whatever. Keep that receipt!


Someday when you go back to court (and trust me, with this type that someday is sure to come) you can show you behaved in an aboveboard fashion.

My ex-wife played this particular game for a couple of years and she ignored it. After year three I got the call from my ex-wife; seems the IRS made a request for payment of back taxes plus interest, penalties, etc.


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## calif_hope (Feb 25, 2011)

Sadly the IRS is not very helpful in this situation. This may not just be about claiming your children, if your ex filed as 'Head of Household' as opposed to single, with dependent children and he lied about the amount if time they lived with him he may qualify for the earned income credit. This credit can be in the thousands and it's paid not just credited to tax owed. So your XH actions may not be just about a bigger tax refund but much more!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

AppleDucklings said:


> I was filing my taxes last week, and it was rejected because it turns out the ex husband claimed the kids on his taxes, which is a no-no for him, because our divorce says he does not get to claim the kids on his taxes. So, I had to remove the kids from mine in order to re-file, and now I have to file an amended tax refund. Well, I called him out on it. A few days later, he called me up almost begging me to not file the amended on him if he were to pay me the money I lost. I said why should I do you any favors, I don't trust you. After everything you put me through, you want me to do you a favor? I said not only do you now owe me $800 for what I lost by you taking the kids on the taxes but you also owe me $300 for a car and another $400 for a gas and electric bill you ran up when you spent our family money on Slvtty McSlvtbucket instead of paying family bills, and in the past 8 months since our divorce, I have not seen a dime from you, why the hell would I trust you to simply pay me what I lost when you unrightfully claimed what was mine on your taxes?
> 
> He says he will give me $1600 in cash in 3 weeks time. I agreed to give him 3 weeks to give me that money before I file the amended refund and let his ass get in trouble. I have the court order that proves he cannot claim those kids. I hate that I feel like I am doing his sorry ass a favor. I should just let him burn.


If I were you I would start action in small claims court.
He will probably try to pay you before the court date.
But if you just sit around I doubt you'll see your $.
You can do him a small favor by keeping him out of trouble with the IRS, but small claims court is easy and local, and then if he doesn't pay up you can report him for tax fraud, esp if you have documents. Since he violated a support agreement too by claiming the kids, if you're not attaching wages, you can do that. In fact, I think you can attach future tax returns if he still owes you at the end of the year. I agree with your adjective.


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