# How did you know?



## BostonBruins32 (Nov 2, 2013)

Hello,

I have another post going on the sex in marriage section. started with sex in marriage, but its much deeper.

I guess just for S's and Giggles, I'd like to throw out the question of how did you know a separation was needed. What were some obvious triggers that told you it was time. Did you regret it or did it help you (regardless of outcome of marriage)? What warrants this (how bad does it have to be)?

I'd be interested in hearing stories of buyers remorse vs worthwhile separations.


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## jld (Dec 1, 2013)

Sorry to hear it may be coming to this, BB.


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## BostonBruins32 (Nov 2, 2013)

Its all good. I'm just interested in some of the triggers for other folks on here.


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## Tron (Jan 31, 2013)

I have seen a few ladies come on here to discuss the how's and why's of their H's separation and it was a combination of resentment, disrespect, anger, no sex, no affection and a lack of appreciation for what the H brought to the relationship.

The separation was a wake up call. Got them reading books, put them in therapy and got them off their azz to fix their $hit.

If your W really loves you, there's a chance that it could be a proper motivator. If she doesn't well...then at least you'll know.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*Totally unbekownst to me, my rich skanky XW was actively banging two of her long-ago BF's on her multiple out-of-town trips. She then asked me for a "trial separation," I theorize, primarily to take me out of the loop of knowledge, and to likely host reciprocal "home games" for these guys, on her own home playing-floor, and right there in our very own bed!*


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## Nikita2270 (Mar 22, 2014)

I started fantasizing about being single every day.

At first, I was petrified. The idea of risking losing custody of my children, moving from the home we had built, not having enough money to support myself, having to separate all the things we had acquired, family court, etc.....

But over time, the fear became less important than the idea of being free at any cost until eventually not waking up miserable and wasting my life with the wrong person was worth the risks I had to take. I got to the point where I knew I would fight to the death for my children but I truly didn't give a crap if I lost everything else. And I knew it was the right thing to do not only for myself but definitely for my children. No child wants to live in a broken home with miserable parents.

Its hard to remember being afraid now. I don't miss the old house that I had to clean endlessly at all...I like my new small one. I don't miss the money...I make my own. I am a better mother to my children and truly enjoy my life with them now.

There comes a time when you stop dreaming and hoping for things because you know that you'll never achieve them with the person you're with. When you get to that point, its time to move on. You only get one life and its way to short to spend it having your energy sucked away by someone who really doesn't put you first.


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