# Rating people /10



## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

After a threadjack on one of my threads, decided its too cool a discussion not to have. So have at it!

Is rating people /10 rude? Do you rate yourself? Do you take it as they don't find you attractive if they rate you less than how you perceive? Are women more offended then men when rated /10? Why? Is it subjective?

Would you post your photos online to be subject to random strangers rating you? Are you self rated or do you follow what others rate you? Or is rating /10 such a shallow abomination it has no place in civilised society?

So many questions! Curious your opinions 🤔


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## Beach123 (Dec 6, 2017)

I live in an area where most people are easily 8-10. So it’s not a matter of “rating”. Good looks are the norm.
What’s more surprising is when an encounter happens with a less than attractive person. They stand out around here. And I find them more interesting to look at than all the beautiful people I see every day.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Anyone remember this movie?


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Beach123 said:


> I live in an area where most people are easily 8-10. So it’s not a matter of “rating”. Good looks are the norm.
> What’s more surprising is when an encounter happens with a less than attractive person. They stand out around here. And I find them more interesting to look at than all the beautiful people I see every day.


Wow really? Where's that I wanna see for myself 😅


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## Beach123 (Dec 6, 2017)

Like I’m going to say where I am… 🤣 
Take my word for it - there’s too many people here.


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

I don't really like ratings but I get the ease of using terms for discussions.

I think women, generally speaking, aren't as accepting of ratings as men and are more often not as objective in their judgement. This is of course, excluding the exceptional women of TAM.😉

I obviously don't care about being judged but my own rating isn't anywhere near where I place my value.
I didn't really hear much about ratings before coming to TAM but I hadn't heard of a lot of things.

Just for fun, I think I might have been a 7 or even an 8 when I was young and pretty, at least with how the women reacted. I also had the bad boy thing going so who knows how that affected it 

I'm probably around a 6 these days. Maybe a little above average but not bad for my age.

I'm a star studded 10 as far as Mrs. C is concerned and there is a Mobius strip in her ratings box for me.😉

Honestly, Mrs C is a smoke show for anyone in her age range. She doesn't think so, being a typical woman who is much harder on herself than anyone else.

I actually don't rate anyone else but I'll have fun with me own self and me Mrs.😋


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## LeGenDary_Man (Sep 25, 2013)

This discussion can be fun to have between friends like two men trying to rate women but keeping this to themselves.

But I have reservations about making it a norm to rate people in terms of looks in real-life interactions. This is different.

Women tend to be insecure about their bodies and looks (many are but will not admit this). Bluntly rating women might aggravate this problem.

It would be better to encourage people to work out and take care of themselves.

Being beautiful is a privilege but there is much more to a human than "looks."

- - - -

Any member here have watched the movie *Beauty Tax* ??? Watch this one. 🙂


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## Enigma32 (Jul 6, 2020)

Beach123 said:


> I live in an area where most people are easily 8-10. So it’s not a matter of “rating”. Good looks are the norm.
> What’s more surprising is when an encounter happens with a less than attractive person. They stand out around here. And I find them more interesting to look at than all the beautiful people I see every day.


Meanwhile, I think most people in my area are probably below average in looks compared to other places.


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## frenchpaddy (May 31, 2021)

so for you guys and girls with experience is what they say true that a 8/10 is crap in bed and that a 5 works more on their bedroom skills ? 
for me I think that the saying beauty is in the eye of the beholder , 
I go for a type


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

RandomDude said:


> After a threadjack on one of my threads, decided its too cool a discussion not to have. So have at it!
> 
> Is rating people /10 rude? Do you rate yourself? Do you take it as they don't find you attractive if they rate you less than how you perceive? Are women more offended then men when rated /10? Why? Is it subjective?
> 
> ...


Recycling some previous words here. With the ‘ranking’ I personally hit a stumbling block with the concept as it’s subjective. That is, it’s in the eye of the beholder and with sociocultural context and dominant standards of beauty at play. Yet sure, I get there's studies about facial symmetry and wotnot. So how could one rank themselves to know their own ‘standing’ when it’s actually down to another’s perception and preferences rather than a fixed ranked number? If going by a ranked number of physical appeal, even if Batman was to rank me a 'high' number, the next dude over might rank me a 'low' number. That said, the 'ranking' scale just seems silly to me. I mean, I can view another as attractive based on both appearance and other factors, yet it wouldn't be a fixed kind of categorization that a number seems to allude to.

I hadn't even heard of it before TAM. To answer your questions: Is rating people rude? I wouldn't call it rude necessarily, lazy perhaps. No I don't rate myself. Aside from messing about with Batman one night about this topic, I've not had anyone share with me what they might 'rate' me. If someone did, let's say a friend given that I'm married, I'd likely just think it strange. To add, friends and I don't really discuss whether we think of ourselves as attractive or what others think. We sometimes compliment one another on physical appearance, but it's not really a focus. While I likely consider most people as 'average' - whatever that means - I do notice _features_ among people that I'd consider beautiful; and some as stunning. Unless I don't like them as a person, that is.

Would I post photos online to be subject to random strangers rating me? No. Why would I - what's the point? I'm the package I'm in and don't give it too much thought. That's not to suggest I don't have moments of vanity and such. Just in terms of this question, the answer would be no I wouldn't. To add, if I were to do that, I'd likely seriously question where my priorities are at within myself.


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## Fly With Me (Jul 11, 2021)

For the most part it is a way to give yourself worth and value either because you perceive yourself to be a high rating or because the person you are with is a high rating which then 'rubs off' on you.

You turn yourself and them into a number rather than a human being and you potentially shut yourself off to connection with those you perceive to be lower or higher than you.

Plus so much of it can be faked if you are good at hair, makeup and clothes. See below.









Janelle Carlisle on Instagram: "🤍Mrs. Ross🤍 . Hair | @jacisdailydos Tan | @tans.by.taylor . #makeup #makeupartist #lubbockmua #softglam #lubbockmakeup #texasmakeup #texasmua #texasmakeupartist #lubbockweddingmakeup #lubbockwedding #lubbockmakeupartist #bridalmakeup #lubbockbridalmakeup #portraitmakeup #hairandmakeup #weddingmakeup #weddingmakeupartist #bridal #bridalmakeup #engagementphotos #engagementmakeup #engagementphotoshoot #travelingmakeupartist #travelingmua #reels #makeupreels #2022bride #viral #viralreels #tattilashes #airbrushmakeup"


Janelle Carlisle shared a post on Instagram: "🤍Mrs. Ross🤍 . Hair | @jacisdailydos Tan | @tans.by.taylor . #makeup #makeupartist #lubbockmua #softglam #lubbockmakeup #texasmakeup #texasmua #texasmakeupartist #lubbockweddingmakeup #lubbockwedding #lubbockmakeupartist #bridalmakeup...




www.instagram.com





You have to be deeply attracted to the person you are with. That's it.









Lewis Howes on Instagram: "How to Find the Right Partner 🔥⁠ ⁠ Follow: @lewishowes x @estherperelofficial and head to episode 1277 for more on this topic.⁠ ⁠ If you're looking for a healthier relationship and have ever wondered why jealousy might just be a good thing, then you'll want to tune into this episode with the one and only Esther Perel.⁠ ⁠ Drop a 🧡 if you're confident you've found the right partner, or know you will soon. 🙌"


Lewis Howes shared a post on Instagram: "How to Find the Right Partner 🔥⁠ ⁠ Follow: @lewishowes x @estherperelofficial and head to episode 1277 for more on this topic.⁠ ⁠ If you're looking for a healthier relationship and have ever wondered why jealousy might just be a good thing, then you'll...




www.instagram.com





The above is a short clip from esther perel on the consumer mentality we bring to relationships that I think rating out of 10 is a symptom of.

I think you might really like Esther Perel!

Here is the full episode : 6 Red Flags To Avoid In Relationships & How To Find Real Love with Esther Perel


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## Livvie (Jan 20, 2014)

Well, is the rating scale one set scale, or is it a sliding scale adjusted for age?

For example, do you you rate 20 year olds and 70 years old by the same scale?

There might be really attractive 60 year olds, but if you're rating them on the same scale as a 20 year old the hot 60 year old is gonna come up with a pretty low rating. He might be an 8 as to 60 year olds, but a 3 if compared to a 25 year old hottie. So how does that work?

I think men often inflate female attractiveness based on superficial and impermanent cues such as make up and clothing and even hair extensions. A true beauty will still be a beauty with no make up, in a t-shirt and jeans, with her natural hair.

I think some men would be shocked to see the natural and actual person of some women they think are so "hot". 

With men it's much more what you see is what you get.


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## bobert (Nov 22, 2018)

Yes it's rude to rate people out of 10, unless they ask. Even if they ask you need to tread carefully. Whenever my wife has asked what she is out of 10 (which isn't often) my answer is always "a solid 9". 10 just sounds too unbelievable 😆 

I think rating people is stupid though. I'm also pretty dang harsh and picky, and some thoughts are better left in my head.

I don't rate myself and I wouldn't post my pictures to Reddit or whatever and have people rate me (or my wife). I don't need that sort of validation. If someone does, that's not someone I'd want to be in a relationship with. 

Back in the days of the 'Cici19whatever' phase, that user posted what "her" face ranked on prettyscale.com - which rates your face from 1-100 and points out your flaws. 

I did it for ****s and giggles. I got 81% and it said my was that my mouth was too wide. Never heard that one before. I did the same with a picture of my wife and it was 89% with no flaws. Though you can use the same photo and get different results each time with slight tweaking.


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## bobert (Nov 22, 2018)

On a related note, when my wife and I were in high school the yearbooks rated people. Some of it was just fun, like I was "most likely to be a rockstar" (I'm still waiting!!). 

My wife and I got "cutest couple" one year and "couple most likely to get married" the next year. 

She got "prettiest" two years in a row and some of the other girls were very unhappy with that and it created a lot of drama. 

As if teens don't have enough issues. They certainly don't need ratings like that in yearbooks. Of course, now social media is there to do it instead...


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## HarryBosch (6 mo ago)

Beach123 said:


> I live in an area where most people are easily 8-10. So it’s not a matter of “rating”. Good looks are the norm.
> What’s more surprising is when an encounter happens with a less than attractive person. They stand out around here. And I find them more interesting to look at than all the beautiful people I see every day.


I live in the opposite... but I did come from a place where there were a lot of 10's. Where I now live, no one dresses for success... its beer bellies,t-shirts, tattoo's, and showing way too much, too often.


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

_Martians_ rate other _Martians_ on their allegiance to the red haired *Race.*
Having more scars and bullet wounds, certainly ups their score.

Loyalty, and hard work counts for everything.

When _Martians_ arrive on _Venus_ to take on a lover, with all those scars, their rating scores plummet to near zero.
I find that odd.


_Are Dee-_


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

When it comes to good friends, looks are less important.
When is comes to lovers, being fit, being kind, is important.



_Are Dee-_


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

We are, what we are.

Keep well groomed, and exercise well, your smile.


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

When you reduce women to a number based on physical appearance, it's hypocritical to then criticize them for only caring about looks or money. If looks are all that matter to you, then it only makes sense you would attract people with similar measures of personal value.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Livvie said:


> Well, is the rating scale one set scale, or is it a sliding scale adjusted for age?
> 
> For example, do you you rate 20 year olds and 70 years old by the same scale?


I was about to reply saying 70 yr olds won't be in my scale at all, then I googled hot 70 yr olds... and...










What in the world?! The woman above is an Aussie and mother of 3, apparently the world's hottest grandma 🤣

So to answer the question, I can adjust the scale based on age. Like I can say for a 70 yr old she's a 9, aesthetically at least, but in most cases will be comparing her to women in general, inclusive of women in their 20s, but frankly... wow, she is hotter than many women in their 20s.


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## snowbum (Dec 14, 2021)

TexasMom1216 said:


> When you reduce women to a number based on physical appearance, it's hypocritical to then criticize them for only caring about looks or money. If looks are all that matter to you, then it only makes sense you would people with similar measures of personal value.


Very true


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## Benbutton (Oct 3, 2019)

Personally I am not a "rater", I'm a "typer". I have a tendency to look at a woman and feel she is attractive but just not my type. She could be an absolute stunner for most, but if she doesn't fit my type then I just won't have any interest.


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

Benbutton said:


> Personally I am not a "rater", I'm a "typer". I have a tendency to look at a woman and feel she is attractive but just not my type. She could be an absolute stunner for most, but if she doesn't fit my type then I just won't have any interest.


I think a "type" is more a measure of the whole person, IMO. I definitely have a type, and looks cease to matter if the person isn't the kind of person to whom I would be attracted. This thread is about valuing women only based on looks. Because it is apparently very surprising when a man picks a woman solely based on how she looks and it turns out she doesn't value him for who he is inside. Then words like "gold digger" get tossed around.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

TexasMom1216 said:


> When you reduce women to a number based on physical appearance, it's hypocritical to then criticize them for only caring about looks or money. If looks are all that matter to you, then it only makes sense you would people with similar measures of personal value.


Looks matter though, that's just life. And yes I do want my partner to be attracted to me physically so it's a plus if she values looks. To each their own. 

I may get disappointed if a woman rates me lower than how I see myself but I can't please everyone, not universally beautiful like some people so it's fair.

Likewise I don't GAF what a woman earns as long as she ain't lazy. Same standards I hold for myself.


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## RebuildingMe (Aug 18, 2019)

I rate in my own head. I have my own general rating and I seek others that are in that same pocket. From my experience with OLD, there were far too many women that were seeking men that were not in their league (looks wise). I started to doubt my own rating, but then saw and read that it was commonplace.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

TexasMom1216 said:


> This thread is about valuing women only based on looks.


The rating, yes I supposed so. It's all superficial. (Also for men btw, I'm a 7 apparently, rated by current sexual partner, yay me 😑 )

I'm tempted to get the other one to rate me, but she's really into me lately so I can only guess it's better than 7 😅

We humans are more than just our looks sure, but looks is definitely one part of the equation when it comes to attractiveness.


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

RandomDude said:


> Looks matter though, that's just life. And yes I do want my partner to be attracted to me physically so it's a plus if she values looks. To each their own.
> 
> I may get disappointed if a woman rates me lower than how I see myself but I can't please everyone, not universally beautiful like some people so it's fair.
> 
> Likewise I don't GAF what a woman earns as long as she ain't lazy. Same standards I hold for myself.


That's fine. Just be aware that when you are only interested in how someone looks, women are not so stupid that they won't realize that is all you value. You're going to get women who base their own value only on how they look. Don't complain when you're a walking wallet to her, or expect her to feel anything for you. It would be foolish for her to get attached to you anyway, because she will only look that way for a few years and then she will change. It's fine to be shallow and base your relationship on how sexually attracted you are to someone, just don't expect it to last. Time comes for us all, believe me, if there were a way money could fix age I'd have found it. She won't look the same forever, and when she changes, she should expect you to leave. That's probably good advice for us all: don't get too attached.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

TexasMom1216 said:


> That's fine. Just be aware that when you are only interested in how someone looks, women are not so stupid that they won't realize that is all you value. You're going to get women who base their own value only on how they look. Don't complain when you're a walking wallet to her, or expect her to feel anything for you. It would be foolish for her to get attached to you anyway, because she will only look that way for a few years and then she will change. It's fine to be shallow and base your relationship on how sexually attracted you are to someone, just don't expect it to last. Time comes for us all, believe me, if there were a way money could fix age I'd have found it. She won't look the same forever, and when she changes, she should expect you to leave. That's probably good advice for us all: don't get too attached.


Yeah that's why the other one has been testing me too, she wants to see more long term substance and so far I've given her the right answers. Because there simply is long term substance beyond our superficial attraction to each other.

Current partner and I by comparison, we simply have no future, not sure if she knows it though or cares though, she doesn't seem future-minded at all. Regardless, she doesn't want exclusivity, so she's definitely following your advice at least, she's not attached.


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## Ursula (Dec 2, 2016)

Beach123 said:


> Like I’m going to say where I am… 🤣
> Take my word for it - there’s too many people here.


My guess is that you live very near a beach, and there are a lot of beautiful beach bodies who also live there.


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

TexasMom1216 said:


> That's fine. Just be aware that when you are only interested in how someone looks, women are not so stupid that they won't realize that is all you value. You're going to get women who base their own value only on how they look. Don't complain when you're a walking wallet to her, or expect her to feel anything for you. It would be foolish for her to get attached to you anyway, because she will only look that way for a few years and then she will change. It's fine to be shallow and base your relationship on how sexually attracted you are to someone, just don't expect it to last. Time comes for us all, believe me, if there were a way money could fix age I'd have found it. She won't look the same forever, and when she changes, she should expect you to leave. That's probably good advice for us all: don't get too attached.


Like cars, you have to trade in every couple of years! 🤣🤣🤣


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

RandomDude said:


> Yeah that's why the other one has been testing me too, she wants to see more long term substance and so far I've given her the right answers. Because there simply is long term substance beyond our superficial attraction to each other.


See, it's just a game to you. You're not interested in her as a person, you're just trying to "win." You should probably stick with the sugar baby one.


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

Numb26 said:


> Like cars, you have to trade in every couple of years! 🤣🤣🤣


Which is fine, just be honest about it. Classic cars require more care and expertise than some people want to expend.


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## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

Excuse me, rate myself a 10? why would I rate myself a 10 when I can rate myself a 20

Now on a serious note. It's all subjective. There are men that LOVE overweight women, the more the merrier. on the other hand there are women that love skinny tiny geeks, so the beefcakes are out luck here.

on average we are judging by western standards of what beauty is as far as ratings are concerned (which are my standards, nonetheless), but even within the western standards there are people that don't conform to those typical standards, and like shapes and forms that most of us would not.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Livvie said:


> I think some men would be shocked to see the natural and actual person of some women they think are so "hot".


Makeup is amazing isn't it?


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## farsidejunky (Mar 19, 2014)

TexasMom1216 said:


> When you reduce women to a number based on physical appearance, it's hypocritical to then criticize them for only caring about looks or money. If looks are all that matter to you, then it only makes sense you would attract people with similar measures of personal value.


I don't think anyone, at any point in this thread, suggested that anyone be reduced to ONLY a number.

Furthermore, the thread was not specifically about women, but both men AND women.

Sent from my Pixel 6 using Tapatalk


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

TexasMom1216 said:


> See, it's just a game to you. You're not interested in her as a person, you're just trying to "win." You should probably stick with the sugar baby one.


Huh? I actually am interested, my answers were actually genuine when I responded to her. I only figured it was a test bc she responded 'good answer'


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## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

Look people, there's an undeniably biological true behind what we as individuals like or not like. We have genetic and cultural forces shaping what we like in prospective mates. You can say all the politically correct things that you might like but deep down within yourself you know what you like. And if you don't like fat women or short men that's fine that should be your prerogative. screw what others might say about your preferences.


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

My Ex asked me once if she was the only one I had been with. I said yes, the rest were 8 or 9's.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Numb26 said:


> My Ex asker me once if she was the only one I had been with. I said yes, the rest were 8 or 9's.


 lol


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Rob_1 said:


> Look people, there's an undeniably biological true behind what we as individuals like or not like. We have genetic and cultural forces shaping what we like in prospective mates. You can say all the politically correct things that you might like but deep down within yourself you know what you like. And if you don't like fat women or short men that's fine that should be your prerogative. screw what others might say about your preferences.


I believe political correctness and the lack of admittance for our physical desires can be attributed to many sexual problems in today's relationships and marriages.

Bury the truth in fear of being offensive. Without being too political, doesn't that sound familiar to several things in your country's current political climate?


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

RandomDude said:


> Huh? I actually am interested, my answers were actually genuine when I responded to her. I only figured it was a test bc she responded 'good answer'


I'll take this back to your other thread, it's not the topic here. 

To answer your initial question, no, I would not post pictures of myself so people could "rate" me. Even at my peak, I know that people are cruel and if I'm not someone's preference they would eviscerate me for fun and I would take it personally. I feel bad enough about myself, I don't need to go looking around for someone to pick me apart so I can feel worse. I cannot even imagine the thought process of someone who wanted to do that.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

TexasMom1216 said:


> I'll take this back to your other thread, it's not the topic here.
> 
> To answer your initial question, no, I would not post pictures of myself so people could "rate" me. Even at my peak, I know that people are cruel and if I'm not someone's preference they would eviscerate me for fun and I would take it personally. I feel bad enough about myself, I don't need to go looking around for someone to pick me apart so I can feel worse. *I cannot even imagine the thought process of someone who wanted to do that.*


Me either, but it was mentioned and I found quite curious 😅


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## Inside_Looking_Out (Apr 8, 2012)

RandomDude said:


> Are women more offended then men when rated /10? Why? Is it subjective?🤔


Speaking for my own opinions personally of course. 

Many/most women are affected by what they hear and how a person makes them feel more so than what the outer package looks like. The outer package is just that. You are shopping around, and the shiny colors draw you in...maybe the marketing department did a great job of splashing the perfect colors on the box and the right slogan to draw you in, but when you go home at night, you don't want to play with the box, you want what's in the box.

We are already very aware of how much work we have to put into our appearance and how temporary our youth is (which is the main product some men seem to want). It's pretty insulting to confirm (by using a rating system) that they don't care about the inside product when the outside is so very temporary.

There is a devastatingly honest quote floating around that really sums up why appearances really aren't as important as one would think though...._Show me the most beautiful woman in the world, and I will show you the man that is sick of her.
_
Beauty alone is simply not enough. Rating systems give off the perception that the 'rater' thinks otherwise though.


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

As far as physical attraction, I only care about that if I'm looking at a potential lover. For _everyone_, I consider compatibility to decide if I want to be a friend or even just an acquaintance; they can be unattractive, just not repulsive. I don't really rate on a scale as it's a binary decision: yes, or no.


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

I hate the old rating thing and I find it incredibly rude. I don't do it myself for those reasons. I feel its incredibly arrogant for people to rate others who they don't even know or barely know, or even themselves, especially when so many people tend to rate themselves too highly in my opinion.
For me good looking guys do little. Many of them are arrogant, and arrogance in a guy is a massive turn off for me. A mans character and personality and integrity (or lack of) make him attractive or not to me. Yes it's important that there is chemistry, but I do wish people would stop being so shallow when they judge others, especially when it's purely on looks. I mean who are we to grade others in this way?


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

Diana7 said:


> I mean who are we to grade others in this way?


Human beings


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

RandomDude said:


> The rating, yes I supposed so. It's all superficial. (Also for men btw, I'm a 7 apparently, rated by current sexual partner, yay me 😑 )
> 
> I'm tempted to get the other one to rate me, but she's really into me lately so I can only guess it's better than 7 😅
> 
> We humans are more than just our looks sure, but looks is definitely one part of the equation when it comes to attractiveness.


I'm too short to be a 7 these days.😉😋


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

And the rating system can be hacked. All you need is "beer goggles" to change the numbers.


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

RandomDude said:


> I was about to reply saying 70 yr olds won't be in my scale at all, then I googled hot 70 yr olds... and...
> 
> View attachment 88759
> 
> ...


Your done, pack it in.


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

Diana7 said:


> I hate the old rating thing and I find it incredibly rude. I don't do it myself for those reasons. I feel its incredibly arrogant for people to rate others who they don't even know or barely know, or even themselves, especially when so many people tend to rate themselves too highly in my opinion.
> For me good looking guys do little. Many of them are arrogant, and arrogance in a guy is a massive turn off for me. A mans character and personality and integrity (or lack of) make him attractive or not to me. Yes it's important that there is chemistry, but I do wish people would stop being so shallow when they judge others, especially when it's purely on looks. I mean who are we to grade others in this way?


I guess it depends on how seriously/personally you take it.


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## DownButNotOut (Apr 9, 2009)

/10 is just another way to keep score. The world is built on pecking orders.

We keep score in our jobs. Everyone knows who the top performers are, and who isn't carrying their weight.
We keep score in our wallets. 
We keep score in sports. Everyone knows who gets picked first, and who gets picked last. It's the way it is.

So we /10 to keep score in the sexual/relationship market. I don't see the big deal.


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## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

DownButNotOut said:


> o we /10 to keep score in the sexual/relationship market. I don't see the big deal.



That's the way it's always been from day one for humans, just as the rest of all life forms on earth. It's just that lately for a lot of humans, the social engineering agendas these days make some people want to pretend that it never has been so, nor should be so. We humans love to be lied, and lie to ourselves. Politicians come to mind. If they were to tell the truth, do you think that they would be elected?

"No losers" does that reminds of something?


----------



## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

Numb26 said:


> Human beings


As human beings shouldn't we stop all this judgement purely on how people look?


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

DownButNotOut said:


> /10 is just another way to keep score. The world is built on pecking orders.
> 
> We keep score in our jobs. Everyone knows who the top performers are, and who isn't carrying their weight.
> We keep score in our wallets.
> ...


Not everyone scores people in this way.


----------



## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

TexasMom1216 said:


> I guess it depends on how seriously/personally you take it.


It seems to be a thing that many men in particular do. I think it's pretty shallow and pathetic.


----------



## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

Diana7 said:


> It seems to be a thing that many men in particular do. I think it's pretty shallow and pathetic.


Initial attraction is based on looks. That's simple biology. If a person isn't attractive to a perspective mate they will not take the time to "get to know them" and will move on to the next potential mate. That's how this thing works.


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

Diana7 said:


> It seems to be a thing that many men in particular do. I think it's pretty shallow and pathetic.


I think you and I both took this too seriously. If someone truly is selecting women solely on the basis of their looks, we are welcome to our opinions about that particular person, and they are welcome to not care. I suspect you and I aren't the intended audience for this question.


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## DownButNotOut (Apr 9, 2009)

Diana7 said:


> Not everyone scores people in this way.


Of course they do. You too. I mean, the very fact that you think men who rank women's looks are shallow and pathetic means you're scoring those men as well. What does shallow and pathetic rate? 2/10?


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## Benbutton (Oct 3, 2019)

TexasMom1216 said:


> I think a "type" is more a measure of the whole person, IMO. I definitely have a type, and looks cease to matter if the person isn't the kind of person to whom I would be attracted. This thread is about valuing women only based on looks. Because it is apparently very surprising when a man picks a woman solely based on how she looks and it turns out she doesn't value him for who he is inside. Then words like "gold digger" get tossed around.


Of course my type includes the whole person, however I meant physical attributes that fit into my type.


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

Benbutton said:


> Of course my type includes the whole person, however I meant physical attributes that fit into my type.


I see, sorry, I misunderstood. A lot of things, apparently. But this is good information, I will apply this to my own life. I'm not as high on the scale as I was 20 years ago so to protect myself I'd best detach.


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## In Absentia (Aug 21, 2012)

I’m a /10, so I don’t have a problem with rating. Just don’t ask my wife…


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## Red Sonja (Sep 8, 2012)

In Absentia said:


> I’m a /10, so I don’t have a problem with rating. Just don’t ask my wife…


I'm a 10 from the neck down ... but only if you count physical symmetry, muscle definition and % body fat ... so basically only if I walk around with a bag over my head.


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## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

I was wondering where all the 10s were, 'cause I couldn't see them anywhere. Based on the responses here, they all were hiding in TAM, wouldn't you believe it, amazing!! Since I'm a 20, I guess I should be excluded from the ratings.


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

RandomDude said:


> After a threadjack on one of my threads, decided its too cool a discussion not to have. So have at it!
> 
> Is rating people /10 rude? Do you rate yourself? Do you take it as they don't find you attractive if they rate you less than how you perceive? Are women more offended then men when rated /10? Why? Is it subjective?
> 
> ...


For me, there is a HUGE difference in what I consider eye candy, and person who is acceptable as a partner and mate. So if people want to put themselves out there for looking at, yes, I will have opinions, and my ovaries and I don’t mind drooling when called for. But my expectations for dating are far more involved than how pretty a man is. I actually prefer not to be involved with a man who is a 8,9, or 10… or who thinks he’s an 8, 9, or 10. Take me right to the nitty gritty of a man’s moral fiber and belief system, his charisma and his confidence in who he is...humor and intellect, his talents. It much easier to see all that without the peacock feathers flashing around.

As far as my own attractiveness and number, some people find me meh, others find me irresistible. It depends on peoples race and body type preferences honestly. So I tend not to give too much credit to anyones rating of me. For instance you’d probably rate me lower since I’m not Asian enough for you. But there are some men who find me “too Asian” so… the ratings are all subjective anyways.


----------



## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

Numb26 said:


> Initial attraction is based on looks. That's simple biology. If a person isn't attractive to a perspective mate they will not take the time to "get to know them" and will move on to the next potential mate. That's how this thing works.


That's not what I am talking about. It's this grading people that is offensive. Giving then marks out of 10.
Incidentally I didn't know what Mr D looked like for a few days as we met on line and back then some profiles didn't have photos.He didn't have one at the time and asked his son to take one after a week or so. I still contacted him and knew he was special.


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## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

QuietRiot said:


> It much easier to see all that without the peacock feathers flashing around.


For a lot of women when those feathers being flashed around are green, they just melt, and suddenly that peacock is an irresistible 10.


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

QuietRiot said:


> For me, there is a HUGE difference in what I consider eye candy, and person who is acceptable as a partner and mate. So if people want to put themselves out there for looking at, yes, I will have opinions, and my ovaries and I don’t mind drooling when called for. But my expectations for dating are far more involved than how pretty a man is. I actually prefer not to be involved with a man who is a 8,9, or 10… or who thinks he’s an 8, 9, or 10. Take me right to the nitty gritty of a man’s moral fiber and belief system, his charisma and his confidence in who he is...humor and intellect, his talents. It much easier to see all that without the peacock feathers flashing around.
> 
> As far as my own attractiveness and number, some people find me meh, others find me irresistible. It depends on peoples race and body type preferences honestly. So I tend not to give too much credit to anyones rating of me. For instance you’d probably rate me lower since I’m not Asian enough for you. But there are some men who find me “too Asian” so… the ratings are all subjective anyways.


There are some women who find my facial features "too Asian". It is what it is I guess


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## minimalME (Jan 3, 2012)

Numb26 said:


> There are some women who find my facial features "too Asian". It is what it is I guess


People say this to you? 😳


----------



## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

minimalME said:


> People say this to you? 😳


Women have, yes


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## minimalME (Jan 3, 2012)

Numb26 said:


> Women have, yes


I find that so, incredibly disrespectful and distasteful.


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

minimalME said:


> I find that so, incredibly disrespectful and distasteful.


It gets worse. Non-Asians think I look too Asian and Asians think I don't look Asian enough. 🤣🤣🤣🤣


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## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

Numb26 said:


> It gets worse. Non-Asians think I look too Asian and Asian think I don't look Asian enough. 🤣🤣🤣🤣



The classical damned if you do, damned if you don't.


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

Rob_1 said:


> The classical damned if you do, damned if you don't.


I get by usually. There are enough Nikushoku Joshi to keep me busy and when I am back in the States I am in too remote of a place to worry about dating.


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## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

minimalME said:


> I find that so, incredibly disrespectful and distasteful.


sometimes I wonder where have people been living all this time to wonder about this type of behavior at all, or if it's just sheer "pretending". We humans are the most successful predator the earth has ever seen, with such wanton disregard for life that if we study history, since the dawn of human life we have been killing each other and the rest of life in this planet in the most horrendous massacres. not to count the deep rooted tribalism mentality that still exist very prominent to these days. Anything that doesn't comfort with what we know and what we perceive to be, specially other people is subject for scorn and distrust. Look at the royals in Britain, don't some of them haven't scorned, and have contempt for that mixed race girl ( I can't remember her name) that marry on the the princes?

this is what we do, day in day out. It's in our nature. It's just that some people refuse to see it, instead, make believe.


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

Numb26 said:


> There are some women who find my facial features "too Asian". It is what it is I guess


Same, it’s part of the territory when you are mixed. Too Asian for some, not Asian enough for others. But there are always those who find it exotic and striking. Everyone has their opinions, I learned to stop taking it personally many years ago… after the 500th person asked me, “What ARE you???”


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

QuietRiot said:


> Same, it’s part of the territory when you are mixed. Too Asian for some, not Asian enough for others. But there are always those who find it exotic and striking. Everyone has their opinions, I learned to stop taking it personally many years ago… after the 500th person asked me, “What ARE you???”


This is my life! LOL I am built like my Polish father but look like my Japanese mother. It seems to be a conversation starter for some people.


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

Rob_1 said:


> For a lot of women when those feathers being flashed around are green, they just melt, and suddenly that peacock is an irresistible 10.


I assume you’re referring to the gold diggers? In which case the man’s looks are a non-factor. That would be a discussion for “how attractive is your bank account”.


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

QuietRiot said:


> I assume you’re referring to the gold diggers? In which case the man’s looks are a non-factor. That would be a discussion for “how attractive is your bank account”.


Such a nice, big, thick..........wallet


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

Numb26 said:


> This is my life! LOL I am built like my Polish father but look like my Japanese mother. It seems to be a conversation starter for some people.


I blame these people for my RBF. Seriously, sometimes I’m not in the mood to explain that genetics work in mysterious ways. It’s even worse when I’m out with my itty bitty Korean mother who can fit in my pocket.


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## minimalME (Jan 3, 2012)

Rob_1 said:


> sometimes I wonder where have people been living all this time to wonder about this type of behavior at all, or if it's just sheer "pretending". We humans are the most successful predator the earth has ever seen, with such wanton disregard for life that if we study history, since the dawn of human life we have been killing each other and the rest of life in this planet in the most horrendous massacres. not to count the deep rooted tribalism mentality that still exist very prominent to these days. Anything that doesn't comfort with what we know and what we perceive to be, specially other people is subject for scorn and distrust. Look at the royals in Britain, don't some of them haven't scorned, and have contempt for that mixed race girl ( I can't remember her name) that marry on the the princes?
> 
> this is what we do, day in day out. It's in our nature. It's just that some people refuse to see it, instead, make believe.


I don’t understand your response?

Are you saying that having self-control, manners, and just generally not being an unkind person is pretending?


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## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

QuietRiot said:


> I assume you’re referring to the gold diggers? In which case the man’s looks are a non-factor. That would be a discussion for “how attractive is your bank account”.



For gold diggers, true. But in reality since the beginning of our species, irrelevantly of where we humans are located, what culture, what color, etc., women has always preferred , and will almost always prefer the dude with the fattest wallet. That's a fact not a supposition.


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

QuietRiot said:


> I blame these people for my RBF. Seriously, sometimes I’m not in the mood to explain that genetics work in mysterious ways. It’s even worse when I’m out with my itty bitty Korean mother who can fit in my pocket.


To be honest, most of the issues with my lineage seems to come from the Japanese side.


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

Rob_1 said:


> For gold diggers, true. But in reality since the beginning of our species, irrelevantly of where we humans are located, what culture, what color, etc., women has always preferred , and will almost always prefer the dude with the fattest wallet. That's a fact not a supposition.


Please explain Pete Davidson.


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

minimalME said:


> I don’t understand your response?
> 
> Are you saying that having self-control, manners, and just generally not being an unkind person is pretending?


Yes. It's not natural human behavior


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## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

minimalME said:


> I don’t understand your response?
> 
> Are you saying that having self-control, manners, and just generally not being an unkind person is pretending?


No. just that as always throughout history there always been and will be those that just look the other way, like it's not happening.


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## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

QuietRiot said:


> Please explain Pete Davidson.


What's there to explain, every rule that exist, even some mathematical, and physical formulas have an exception. There's not surprise there. Nothing is rigid, not even quantum mechanics laws.

Forgot to mention, there's always been those that will "keep" a younger man or woman. It's a transaction, mostly with the few flyers, here and there.


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## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

QuietRiot said:


> Please explain Pete Davidson.


His current “relationship” is said to be fake like some of his others (many arranged situations in that world). And what he has that’s big and fat is also said not to be his wallet.


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

Numb26 said:


> To be honest, most of the issues with my lineage seems to come from the Japanese side.


Well Asians can be super racist. I know a lot of people (media) don’t like to think that people of color can be racist… but whoooo boy. There have been several full Korean males that let it be known they wouldn’t date me because I’m not full. I wasn’t asking to date them to begin with… but thanks for sharing dudes. 

Are you finding it hard to be resisted with the rise of the Asian boy bands? Your number had to have jumped like 2 or three levels by now?


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

QuietRiot said:


> Well Asians can be super racist. I know a lot of people (media) don’t like to think that people of color can be racist… but whoooo boy. There have been several full Korean males that let it be known they wouldn’t date me because I’m not full. I wasn’t asking to date them to begin with… but thanks for sharing dudes.
> 
> Are you finding it hard to be resisted with the rise of the Asian boy bands? Your number had to have jumped like 2 or three levels by now?


Maybe if I was 30 years younger. 🤣🤣🤣


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

Rob_1 said:


> What's there to explain, every rule that exist, even some mathematical, and physical formulas have an exception. There's not surprise there. Nothing is rigid, not even quantum mechanics laws.
> 
> Forgot to mention, there's always been those that will "keep" a younger man or woman. It's a transaction, mostly with the few flyers, here and there.


Ok. Well I don’t see your “fact” in any of the relationships I am around. I know one person that married a man for his ability to support her, I know 2 men that married women because of her family money, and all the rest married for the same reasons everyone else does, stupidity.


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

Openminded said:


> His current “relationship” is said to be fake like some of his others (many arranged situations in that world). And what he has that’s big and fat is also said not to be his wallet.


My gosh I’m not into ratings, but he is a solid .5


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## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

QuietRiot said:


> Ok. Well I don’t see your “fact”


No offense, but you either have been living a secluded life or haven't been introduce to human social and economical history. Until very recently in time in the last couple of centuries, looks, love, and likes, have nothing to do with marriage and relationships. It was and still is in certain societies a transactional business.


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

Rob_1 said:


> No offense, but you either have been living a secluded life or haven't been introduce to human social and economical history. Until very recently in time in the last couple of centuries, looks, love, and likes, have nothing to do with marriage and relationships. It was and still is in certain societies a transactional business.


Or perhaps you see what you want to see? I don’t make blanket statements about men and women and their motives… so it’s a reasonable conclusion that I see people and what they do on an individual basis…. 

Maybe you surround yourself with men who choose gold diggers. I don’t know what to tell you. I have a lot of decent friendships with females and males who do not operate this way, and in a very huge city. I’m not living in utopia. Think less of me all you want for not witnessing your pessimistic mandates on genders as a rule, it doesn’t bother me at all. But the topic was for rating of physicality not money… so that’s what I was discussing to begin with. The peacock feathers. Didn’t mean to ruffle your feathers though.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

QuietRiot said:


> Well Asians can be super racist. I know a lot of people (media) don’t like to think that people of color can be racist… but whoooo boy. There have been several full Korean males that let it be known they wouldn’t date me because I’m not full. I wasn’t asking to date them to begin with… but thanks for sharing dudes.
> 
> Are you finding it hard to be resisted with the rise of the Asian boy bands? Your number had to have jumped like 2 or three levels by now?


I dont consider racial preferences racist. There's a difference between hate and simply not finding a particular ethnic group attractive. Koreans are homogeneous in general too, many dont even date non-Koreans even if they find them attractive. It's just culture. 

Yes I go for them too 🤣 Koreans quite tall in my generation (I'm still a youngin 😊), then again many Asians are, even Vietnamese it seems which is very surprising. In my 20s I would never have gone for them.


----------



## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

RandomDude said:


> I dont consider racial preferences racist. There's a difference between hate and simply not finding a particular ethnic group attractive. Koreans are homogeneous in general too, many dont even date non-Koreans even if they find them attractive. It's just culture. Yes I go for them too 🤣


I dont think it is racist either, which is why I don’t take it personally if someone doesn’t prefer my “look”, it does make them an asshole when they pronounce it and aren’t asked though. But there is straight racism in other ways and it can come both sides when you are mixed… a lot of it from your own family. I think that’s what Numb was getting at from his Japanese side. For instance being treated differently than your full blooded cousins by grandparents.


----------



## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

QuietRiot said:


> Or perhaps you see what you want to see? I don’t make blanket statements about men and women and their motives… so it’s a reasonable conclusion that I see people and what they do on an individual basis….
> 
> Maybe you surround yourself with men who choose gold diggers. I don’t know what to tell you. I have a lot of decent friendships with females and males who do not operate this way, and in a very huge city. I’m not living in utopia. Think less of me all you want for not witnessing your pessimistic mandates on genders as a rule, it doesn’t bother me at all. But the topic was for rating of physicality not money… so that’s what I was discussing to begin with. The peacock feathers. Didn’t mean to ruffle your feathers though.



Like I originally said:


Rob_1 said:


> No. just that as always throughout history there always been and will be those that just look the other way, like it's not happening.



And believe me, you haven't ruffle my feathers one bit. But yes you are right, this is threadjacking, so let's get back to the topic. and I apologize to everyone for it.


----------



## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

Rob_1 said:


> Like I originally said:
> 
> 
> 
> And believe me, you haven't ruffle my feathers one bit. But yes you are right, this is threadjacking, so let's get back to the topic. and I apologize to everyone for it.


I mean… you could start an equivalent thread on your idea that women choose men for money as a rule. I’m sure it would be an interesting thread. I’ll ruffle your feathers some more. 😉


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## ThatDarnGuy! (Jan 11, 2022)

Rob_1 said:


> For gold diggers, true. But in reality since the beginning of our species, irrelevantly of where we humans are located, what culture, what color, etc., women has always preferred , and will almost always prefer the dude with the fattest wallet. That's a fact not a supposition.


Gold diggers don't care anything about the guy. Most of them have a secret bf or dating others. All they care about is access to his account. They just hop on him for a quick ride or show some skin once in a while to keep him happy.


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## ThatDarnGuy! (Jan 11, 2022)

Everyone is going to be different in rating a person on a scale like this. What one person says is a 10 might be a 2 to me. But personally, I like women who are size 12-14 with ample chest and a little padding 😁. Women who are a size 0/2, with Botox face/puffy lips and ribs showing aren't attractive to me.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

QuietRiot said:


> I dont think it is racist either, which is why I don’t take it personally if someone doesn’t prefer my “look”, it does make them an asshole when they pronounce it and aren’t asked though. But there is straight racism in other ways and it can come both sides when you are mixed… a lot of it from your own family. I think that’s what Numb was getting at from his Japanese side. For instance being treated differently than your full blooded cousins by grandparents.


Depends on the culture and history I guess, my people are Mongol in origin and we have been banging everyone else since the dawn of time. We don't really care in general but there are those who do judge the decisions of those who intermix nowadays, because we are low in numbers. I'm a lost cause being so far away from the motherland and fatherland so meh...


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

ThatDarnGuy! said:


> Everyone is going to be different in rating a person on a scale like this. What one person says is a 10 might be a 2 to me. But personally, I like women who are size 12-14 with ample chest and a little padding 😁. Women who are a size 0/2, with Botox face/puffy lips and ribs showing aren't attractive to me.


And a woman can be flat chested with no butt but if she has nice long shapely legs? 10/10 🤣 it is subjective


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

RandomDude said:


> Depends on the culture and history I guess, my people are Mongol in origin and we have been banging everyone else since the dawn of time. We don't really care in general but there are those who do judge the decisions of those who intermix nowadays, because we are low in numbers. I'm a lost cause being so far away from the motherland and fatherland so meh...


I think most peoples ancestors banged everyone else since the dawn of time. I had a few little surprises in my DNA test results that my parents and grandparents knew nothing about….


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

QuietRiot said:


> I think most peoples ancestors banged everyone else since the dawn of time. I had a few little surprises in my DNA test results that my parents and grandparents knew nothing about….


So fun, right? Mine wasn't surprising at all. My family were boring. That would be another fun thread.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

QuietRiot said:


> I think most peoples ancestors banged everyone else since the dawn of time. I had a few little surprises in my DNA test results that my parents and grandparents knew nothing about….


Not yours 😅 , at least on your mother's side
Korean homogeneity is well known


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## ThatDarnGuy! (Jan 11, 2022)

RandomDude said:


> And a woman can be flat chested with no butt but if she has nice long shapely legs? 10/10 🤣 it is subjective


Exactly.... It's all subjective and everyone has a different preference. But personality is 90% of what matters as you can be physically the most stunning lady he has ever seen. It won't last if you have no personality to him.

I remember those days 😁. I would get all excited about a date with a hottie just to discover she had no personality and couldn't hold a conversation. Just thought her looks was enough.


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

RandomDude said:


> Not yours 😅 , at least on your mother's side
> Korean homogeneity is well known


Well, I have a little bit of Japanese in me, and that’s not a “that’s what she said” joke @Numb26! 🤣 

Meanwhile… across the world my Nordic ancestors were having their own fun.


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

QuietRiot said:


> Meanwhile… across the world my Nordic ancestors were having their own fun.


Maybe with mine!


----------



## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

QuietRiot said:


> Well, I have a little bit of Japanese in me, and that’s not a “that’s what she said” joke @Numb26! 🤣
> 
> Meanwhile… across the world my Nordic ancestors were having their own fun.





TexasMom1216 said:


> Maybe with mine!


Hahaha, whereever there was a river, the Norse has been there having fun with everyone 






@QuietRiot @Numb26 I do find your experiences curious though, with our partial mixes my looks lean Asian, my ex-wife leans white. Most Eurasian mixes lean Asian.

Yet my daughter leans both ways at the same time. You mentioned people stare because they can't figure out 'what' you are? lol that happens and it seems she's destined to live your lives. Because of her blend when she's with me no one bats an eye and when she's with my ex no one bats an eye either. She has four ethnic groups behind her, but 100% Australian. I don't expect her to culturally carry on any of her ethnic traditions though and it's hard with a split household since divorce.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

ThatDarnGuy! said:


> Exactly.... It's all subjective and everyone has a different preference. But personality is 90% of what matters as you can be physically the most stunning lady he has ever seen. It won't last if you have no personality to him.
> 
> I remember those days 😁. I would get all excited about a date with a hottie just to discover she had no personality and couldn't hold a conversation. Just thought her looks was enough.


Personality is subjective too no?


----------



## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

RandomDude said:


> Hahaha, whereever there was a river, the Norse has been there having fun with everyone
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I get it from my cousins mostly. I speak fluently but with no accent so of course I hear about that all the time. LOL
With my kids only one looks outwardly Japanese. The other two take after their mother and besides the hair you never know they had any Asian descendents.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Numb26 said:


> I get it from my cousins mostly. I speak fluently but with no accent so of course I hear about that all the time. LOL
> With my kids only one looks outwardly Japanese. The other two take after their mother and besides the hair you never know they had any Asian descendents.


LOL at least you maintained your language, even if you get teased

Genetics is a weird thing, ex-wife had natural blonde hair. I don't believe her mum is full Asian either but whatever lol
They always say white genes are recessive but you never know when they pop up outta nowhere like daisies along generational lines. Among my people it's normal but it's expected as we are the _original_ Eurasians. We are the REAL mutts, you rookies 😝 hahaha


----------



## ThatDarnGuy! (Jan 11, 2022)

RandomDude said:


> Personality is subjective too no?


Absolutely


----------



## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

We all are mutts.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Rob_1 said:


> We all are mutts.


Sure but back on topic. I still prefer Asians  

I reckon it's association, the first time I ever had butterflies / romantic infatuation was with an Asian girl think I was 12? 13? 15? Can't remember it's ancient history. 
Strangely, I've never had butterflies with any other race since then, no matter how awesome they were like ex-wife, though I was attracted to her in other ways - sexually for instance because of her long legs. Another reason why racial preferences should be respected.

When people know what they want, it's for good reason.


----------



## DudeInProgress (Jun 10, 2019)

RandomDude said:


> After a threadjack on one of my threads, decided its too cool a discussion not to have. So have at it!
> 
> Is rating people /10 rude? Do you rate yourself? Do you take it as they don't find you attractive if they rate you less than how you perceive? Are women more offended then men when rated /10? Why? Is it subjective?
> 
> ...


I would imagine that one’s feelings about rating scales are largely a matter of where one would typically find oneself on said scale…


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

QuietRiot said:


> I actually prefer not to be involved with a man who is a 8,9, or 10… or who thinks he’s an 8, 9, or 10.


So, should I be flattered my current partner reckons I'm a 7?
Means I'm not too hot to handle and not exactly unattractive either so...













> As far as my own attractiveness and number, some people find me meh, others find me irresistible. It depends on peoples race and body type preferences honestly. So I tend not to give too much credit to anyones rating of me. For instance you’d probably rate me lower since I’m not Asian enough for you. But there are some men who find me “too Asian” so… the ratings are all subjective anyways.


That's the thing though with the rating, I acknowledge its subjectiveness and I've always said beauty is in the eye of the beholder. For me, I would consider it a disservice to go for someone if I'm not attracted to them when they can be with someone else who does find them attractive.

I've done this disservice to the two women in my life who have loved me the most, my ex-wife AND my ex-fiancee. Ex-fiancee I was in love with deeply. Yet love was not enough. This is why I am super 'shallow' today, and will NOT 'widen' my preferences. Never again, for they both deserve better, and if I have a new partner she deserves someone who is self-aware enough to know his preferences no?


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

QuietRiot said:


> I actually prefer not to be involved with a man who is a 8,9, or 10…


You don't. I am. Trust me.


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

RandomDude said:


> So, should I be flattered my current partner reckons I'm a 7?
> Means I'm not too hot to handle and not exactly unattractive either so...
> View attachment 88779
> 
> ...


There is the phenomenon of “dating down”. I have always tended to date slightly down in looks because I find the very good looking guys to be too happy about it. As in, getting their way, having a wide variety of choices in females, and weaponizing it to an extent... that said, I typically dated “up” in talent. Artistic, mechanically inclined, very intelligent, something has always been very attractive that was non-physical in them… (AND ITS NOT THEIR POCKET BOOK ROB! 🤣)

Unfortunately, the guy I married decided to beef up substantially in muscle and money 5 years into our marriage and it really did change the dynamic of everything. That’s a story that’s worn out though. Done is done. 

Soooo…. Yes good job on being a 7…. (Except this girl indicated how HOT her ex is??? That’s not a good thing with her me thinks. Sorry to deflate that balloon.)


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## sideways (Apr 12, 2016)

When I was young and naive I was drawn to a woman's physical attributes. I went out with extremely beautiful women but the majority of them wound up being stuck up and vain. They weren't good people. I saw their heart and it wasn't good and it made them UGLY to me.

Physical beauty will ALWAYS fade. I'll take a woman with a big heart, a kind soul, someone who can laugh at themselves and have fun, someone who likes who they are and not needing validation from others and relying on their looks to get it.

Not saying physical attraction isn't important but man oh man there are other things that are WAY more important. Does she like children, would she be a good mother, is she loyal, reliable, trustworthy, and so many other things that have nothing to do with physical beauty.

Everywhere you turn people are trying to put labels on people. Enough already!! 

Just one man's opinion.


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## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

QuietRiot said:


> (AND ITS NOT THEIR POCKET BOOK ROB! 🤣)


Reminder. Just because you don't, it doesn't means others don't.


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

Rob_1 said:


> Reminder. Just because you don't, it doesn't means others don't.


Just poking the bear. I think there is a lot more than you realize. 🙂


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

QuietRiot said:


> There is the phenomenon of “dating down”. I have always tended to date slightly down in looks because I find the very good looking guys to be too happy about it. As in, getting their way, having a wide variety of choices in females, and weaponizing it to an extent... that said, I typically dated “up” in talent. Artistic, mechanically inclined, very intelligent, something has always been very attractive that was non-physical in them… (AND ITS NOT THEIR POCKET BOOK ROB! 🤣)
> 
> Unfortunately, the guy I married decided to beef up substantially in muscle and money 5 years into our marriage and it really did change the dynamic of everything. That’s a story that’s worn out though. Done is done.
> 
> Soooo…. Yes good job on being a 7…. (Except this girl indicated how HOT her ex is??? That’s not a good thing with her me thinks. Sorry to deflate that balloon.)


Heh well I have to be honest, jokes aside, being rated a 7 by her (and being compared to her gym rat ex) has added to my belief that we have no long term potential. This is due to being appreciated for my looks throughout my life and by past partners and even at present since we aren't exclusively dating - another woman who calls me by a pet name and flirting with me really intensely on text/call/video before we go volunteering for our first date.

She is very obviously into me, teases and compliments my features regularly, I like that, as superficial as it may be. I guess I like someone who finds me attractive. I rate myself 7 because I've never been rated lower by my partners. I don't count general public or care I only want to be appreciated by the one I'm intimate with  

Also why I feel guilt, because that's what my partners wanted from me, even if I can objectively admit they are among the most beautiful women in the world, but subjectively, they both had missing ticks on my boxes. I don't like the idea of 'dating down' or having some 'date down' for me. What if my current partner finds someone who has all my non-physical attributes + big muscles then what? Nah, not happy with that.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

sideways said:


> When I was young and naive I was drawn to a woman's physical attributes. I went out with extremely beautiful women but the majority of them wound up being stuck up and vain. They weren't good people. I saw their heart and it wasn't good and it made them UGLY to me.


What if a woman has a kind heart but is simply confident with herself, looks in the mirror and knows she's sexy?



> Physical beauty will ALWAYS fade. I'll take a woman with a big heart, a kind soul, someone who can laugh at themselves and have fun, someone who likes who they are and not needing validation from others and relying on their looks to get it.


I also found beautiful women require less validation, not always sure, but yes. Many are also fun, and my current partner has a much bigger heart than I.



> Not saying physical attraction isn't important but man oh man there are other things that are WAY more important. Does she like children, would she be a good mother, is she loyal, reliable, trustworthy, and so many other things that have nothing to do with physical beauty.
> 
> Everywhere you turn people are trying to put labels on people. Enough already!!
> 
> Just one man's opinion.


You can have both


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

RandomDude said:


> Heh well I have to be honest, jokes aside, being rated a 7 by her (and being compared to her gym rat ex) has added to my belief that we have no long term potential. This is due to being appreciated for my looks throughout my life and by past partners and even at present since we aren't exclusively dating - another woman who calls me by a pet name and flirting with me really intensely on text/call/video before we go volunteering for our first date.
> 
> She is very obviously into me, teases and compliments my features regularly, I like that, as superficial as it may be. I guess I like someone who finds me attractive. I rate myself 7 because I've never been rated lower by my partners. I don't count general public or care I only want to be appreciated by the one I'm intimate with
> 
> Also why I feel guilt, because that's what my partners wanted from me. I don't like the idea of 'dating down' or having some 'date down' for me. What if my current partner finds someone who has all my non-physical attributes + big muscles then what? Nah, not happy with that.


 Those non-physical attributes are the only ones worthwhile in my book. Nobody can be you… even if I tend to “date down” I don’t believe that it’s something that’s continual, I’m not with someone and thinking they are ugly lol… For me the attraction itself is more involved in the non-physical.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

QuietRiot said:


> Those non-physical attributes are the only ones worthwhile in my book. *Nobody can be you… *even if I tend to “date down” I don’t believe that it’s something that’s continual, I’m not with someone and thinking they are ugly lol… For me the attraction itself is more involved in the non-physical.


Yeah they can, or they can be better in non-physical attributes. They could be more giving and affectionate, less dismissive avoidant, richer than me, god-fearing if they are Christian, kinder more sympathetic to people, less judgemental, less harsh and severe, more ambitious as I'm very lazy right now compared to my youth. So hey it's nice to at least know I have my natural superficial advantages fully appreciated in terms of competitiveness lol


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## Corgi Mum (10 mo ago)

RandomDude said:


> And a woman can be flat chested with no butt but if she has nice long shapely legs? 10/10 🤣 it is subjective


This is why I like you so much  Not many guys have an appreciation for flat chested buttless women.

The rating thing has been around since before my youth and fortunately I've probably aged out of it at this point. So I'll just leave this little gem here, circa 1979


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## QuietRiot (Sep 10, 2020)

RandomDude said:


> Yeah they can, or they can be better in non-physical attributes. They could be more giving and affectionate, less dismissive avoidant, richer than me, god-fearing if they are Christian, kinder more sympathetic to people, less judgemental, less harsh and severe, more ambitious as I'm very lazy right now compared to my youth. So hey it's nice to at least know I have my natural superficial advantages fully appreciated in terms of competitiveness lol


Those are measures of fitting well on a personal level though, no? I mean, that’s the purpose of dating, to see how well you mesh and to see if you’re a good fit… if you base this all on physicality and are afraid someone is going to leave you for bigger muscles… well that’s what’s going to happen when someone is looking more for the skin deep assets I would say.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Corgi Mum said:


> Not many guys have an appreciation for flat chested buttless women.


FINALLY some appreciation for us pure legaholics


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

QuietRiot said:


> Those are measures of fitting well on a personal level though, no? I mean, that’s the purpose of dating, to see how well you mesh and to see if you’re a good fit… if you base this all on physicality and are afraid someone is going to leave you for bigger muscles… well that’s what’s going to happen when someone is looking more for the skin deep assets I would say.


Ah, but it's not only skin deep you see. Looks is but one big checkbox to tick, big enough though to be worth considering. A lot is forgiven when someone is hot, and this is not just for guys either. We can't always find a perfect fit, and sometimes an imperfect fit gives the most growth. I'm learning to temper my overthinking since I started dating my polar opposite, but I wouldn't have even considered sticking around if she's not as hot as she is.

Kinda like the new thread on the sex section, and my response:


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

RandomDude said:


> Sure but back on topic. I still prefer Asians


I've had a lot of Asians after me. 😵‍💫


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

ConanHub said:


> I've had a lot of Asians after me. 😵‍💫


I'm 100% straight bro and even I reckon you're good looking 

Still I reckon I get more 😝


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## pastasauce79 (Mar 21, 2018)

I realized I rate people more now than in the past. I guess this is because I don't have patience for BS 🤣 and I don't care what people think of me. It's kinda liberating, I know what I find attractive in a man and I'm not ashamed of it. If someone thinks I'm a zero, that's fine by me. 

I think I'm a 7-8 ish? My number goes up every time a man looks and stares at me, maybe he thinks I'm a 10! 😉


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

pastasauce79 said:


> I realized I rate people more now than in the past. I guess this is because I don't have patience for BS 🤣 and I don't care what people think of me. It's kinda liberating, I know what I find attractive in a man and I'm not ashamed of it. If someone thinks I'm a zero, that's fine by me.
> 
> I think I'm a 7-8 ish? My number goes up every time a man looks and stares at me, maybe he thinks I'm a 10! 😉


I'd like to think I'm 7+, never been rated lower  But I only count those who I'm intimate with, and people probably won't be intimate with me unless I'm a 7+ to them so biased sample lol

Years ago when I considered professional matchmaking I've also been rated 'attractive' by these so-called professionals, but they didn't rate me the next one up on their box which is 'very attractive' 😑 So 7 is probably accurate... bah! I think I got a rather honest rating from my current girl regardless of how insulting it is.

My ex rated me an 11 but she's was in love at first sight and love is blind so it doesn't count. Ex before her rated me 9, but I was exactly her type. It's subjective! I do want to know I'm someone's type though if I'm thinking long term


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

RandomDude said:


> I'd like to think I'm 7+, never been rated lower  But I only count those who I'm intimate with, and people probably won't be intimate with me unless I'm a 7+ to them so biased sample lol
> 
> Years ago when I considered professional matchmaking I've also been rated 'attractive' by these so-called professionals, but they didn't rate me the next one up on their box which is 'very attractive' 😑 So 7 is probably accurate... bah! I think I got a rather honest rating from my current girl regardless of how insulting it is.
> 
> My ex rated me an 11 but she's was in love at first sight and love is blind so it doesn't count. Ex before her rated me 9, but I was exactly her type. It's subjective! I do want to know I'm someone's type though if I'm thinking long term


I'm a -7. Makes life easier


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Numb26 said:


> *I'm a -7.* Makes life easier


Doubt you are, it only goes 0-10 😝


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

RandomDude said:


> Doubt you are, it only goes 0-10 😝


I could tell you stories! LOL


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## snowbum (Dec 14, 2021)

Rating people is harmful. Comparing people to some ideal is damaging to many people. Teens develop eating disorders striving to meet the ideal”. People work out compulsively to lose weight. I look young. However I’m short and don’t have the magical LBR ratio you expound upon. Can I fix that? Nope. Can I get back to the weight I wax in my 20s 3 kids and decades ago? Nope. And before people jump on that , I’m training for a full marathon. I run /walk 10+ miles a day and am a size 12. Been called fat here.Do i consider myself attractive? Most of the time. But thinking : hmmm… compared to 22 year old 5’9 size zero where do I rate? Sucks. It’s shallow and petty.


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

snowbum said:


> Rating people is harmful. Comparing people to some ideal is damaging to many people. Teens develop eating disorders striving to meet the ideal”. People work out compulsively to lose weight. I look young. However I’m short and don’t have the magical LBR ratio you expound upon. Can I fix that? Nope. Can I get back to the weight I wax in my 20s 3 kids and decades ago? Nope. And before people jump on that , I’m training for a full marathon. I run /walk 10+ miles a day and am a size 12. Been called fat here.Do i consider myself attractive? Most of the time. But thinking : hmmm… compared to 22 year old 5’9 size zero where do I rate? Sucks. It’s shallow and petty.


Uncomfortable truth is that everyone rates others one way or the other. It's how we chose potential partners. Be silly to deny it


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

snowbum said:


> Rating people is harmful. Comparing people to some ideal is damaging to many people. Teens develop eating disorders striving to meet the ideal”. People work out compulsively to lose weight. I look young. However I’m short and don’t have the magical LBR ratio you expound upon. Can I fix that? Nope. Can I get back to the weight I wax in my 20s 3 kids and decades ago? Nope. And before people jump on that , I’m training for a full marathon. I run /walk 10+ miles a day and am a size 12. Been called fat here.Do i consider myself attractive? Most of the time. But thinking : hmmm… compared to 22 year old 5’9 size zero where do I rate? Sucks. It’s shallow and petty.


But the ideal is subjective and different for everyone. I'm not a muscly guy so I lose points with my girl, who I may ditch me anytime as it's just non-exclusive dating and sex. I look like another one of my ex's childhood crush so I gain points there so it's all subjective.

Of course it's unhealthy to measure yourself up to someone else's ideal, you only measure yourself up to YOUR ideal, and when you find someone else who appreciates you then it's a match! People shouldn't take it so personally when others aren't attracted to them or when they get left swiped.

It also doesn't really matter if someone loves you. I still wanted to marry my ex even though I wasn't directly sexually attracted. She was still the most beautiful woman I've been with, it was her eyes and her smile that made her universally stunning. She got the love and sex that was driven out of love and emotion, but she wanted more, she wanted the raw lust and that comes with sexual attraction, which can be very shallow, superficial, and very brutal - and sadly, with that, I could not provide. 

But that's life, we can't program our sexual desires, turn ons or offs, if we can the world would be so much simpler.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Numb26 said:


> I could tell you stories! LOL


Haha sure you have plenty!



Numb26 said:


> Uncomfortable truth is that everyone rates others one way or the other. It's how we chose potential partners. Be silly to deny it


It shouldn't be uncomfortable, few of us are universally attractive to everyone.


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## snowbum (Dec 14, 2021)

Ic I’m honest a 7 would be pushing it for me on most Hollywood scales. On the other hand I’ve been honestly carded for liquor at 50. Some of my colleagues thought I was 35. But I’m Mare Winningham Tom to Demi Moore. The wholesome next door neighbor type that’s not going to win any parents type. And to hear the quest for physical perfection here is kind of disheartning


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

snowbum said:


> Ic I’m honest a 7 would be pushing it for me on most Hollywood scales. On the other hand I’ve been honestly carded for liquor at 50. Some of my colleagues thought I was 35. But I’m Mare Winningham Tom to Demi Moore. The wholesome next door neighbor type that’s not going to win any parents type. And to hear the quest for physical perfection here is kind of disheartning


But everyone's idea of physical perfection is different


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

snowbum said:


> Ic I’m honest a 7 would be pushing it for me on most Hollywood scales. On the other hand I’ve been honestly carded for liquor at 50. Some of my colleagues thought I was 35. But I’m Mare Winningham Tom to Demi Moore. The wholesome next door neighbor type that’s not going to win any parents type. And to hear the quest for physical perfection here is kind of disheartning


It makes it hard to diet and exercise knowing perfection is impossible. Hits me in my feelz. But then, I’m pretty sure I took this WAY too personally and seriously. Still though, same, disheartening.


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## snowbum (Dec 14, 2021)

I think people will agree Giselle and cindy Crawford are most mens perfection, are they not?


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

snowbum said:


> I think people will agree Giselle and cindy Crawford are most mens perfection, are they not?


Not even close. Not for me at least


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## snowbum (Dec 14, 2021)

I mean I run/walk 60 miles a wek. I’ve been trying to get back to running 8+ miles. I’m curvy. I’m not leggy. That’s not what sells. It’s not “hot”. I take good pictures and have compliments. Never been picked up. Never had a rando give me their # etc so clearly not higher than a 7


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

snowbum said:


> I think people will agree Giselle and cindy Crawford are most mens perfection, are they not?


Kate Beckinsale. I wish I could take her picture to the plastic surgeon and order all of that. But yeah, they’re both kind of older but in their day, perfect. Margot Robbie is another that is perfect.


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

snowbum said:


> I mean I run/walk 60 miles a wek. I’ve been trying to get back to running 8+ miles. I’m curvy. I’m not leggy. That’s not what sells. It’s not “hot”. I take good pictures and have compliments. Never been picked up. Never had a rando give me their # etc so clearly not higher than a 7


You’re a 10 to me. ❤


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## Numb26 (Sep 11, 2019)

TexasMom1216 said:


> Kate Beckinsale. I wish I could take her picture to the plastic surgeon and order all of that. But yeah, they’re both kind of older but in their day, perfect. Margot Robbie is another that is perfect.


Not Kate either. LOL If I gave you my list you would laugh


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

Numb26 said:


> Not Kate either. LOL If I gave you my list you would laugh


I’m sure I wouldn’t laugh. Really, not Kate? She’s perfect. But to each his own.


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

TexasMom1216 said:


> I’m sure I wouldn’t laugh. Really, not Kate? She’s perfect. But to each his own.


She was in Underworld? I like her.


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

ccpowerslave said:


> She was in Underworld? I like her.


Me too. She’s one of my major girl crushes.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Numb26 said:


> But everyone's idea of physical perfection is different


Exactly, and different cultures / races down to individuals has their idea of perfection. Since you guys know I ain't white, let's share some other standards:

Physical perfection among my people, who I reckon is hot and who I wish I look like:

















Physical perfection for me, for women:










Yup, I'm a lowly 7 😑 Bah!

YET, it's all subjective, because my ex before my ex liked Lee Min Ho and reckons I looked like him and rated me a 9. But I reckon he's a 7 at most. I don't know why girls dig him:

















But loads of Asian girls go for this look! I admit he looks like me when he puts on weight though, he has my chubby cheeks 😑

Yes I'm babyfaced and it sucks because I can never have those robust features that's typical of Mongols, I have no idea how I ended up looking so hujaa. But I still get tons of matches despite what I percieve as my physical imperfections. Looks is subjective, beauty will always be in the eye of the beholder.

There are some advantages of being babyfaced, I can date WAY younger women  Disadvantages too, I don't look as manly as half the men out there.


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

This is turning into comparing oneself with others. Can other people be viewed as stunning without comparison to ourselves? Whether putting oneself down or boosting oneself up?

I was reflecting on a party we recently went to. Talking with an objectively attractive young woman, and what made her stunning to me was that her social interaction / skills were full of consideration and warmth. She’s in her skin; I’m in my mine. I did embed, to a degree, how she navigated the conversation between us as I respected that. Then another woman, older than me, again demonstrated warmth and I also perceived her as stunning. I enjoyed the feeling of ease with her and with our conversation; which initially started by way of her light-heartedly making fun of me that we both laughed about. I learned a bit about her and through that, in a sense, there was some comparison yet in a way that I found inspiring. I didn’t compare my appearance with theirs. What purpose would that serve to myself or them?

Yes, Margot Robbie is objectively physically attractive. I don’t look like her. She doesn’t look like me. So what?


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

snowbum said:


> I think people will agree Giselle and cindy Crawford are most mens perfection, are they not?












Gotta admit... 9/10










6/10 at best. Probably 5, she doesn't turn me on at all.


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

TexasMom1216 said:


> Me too. She’s one of my major girl crushes.


I am really not that picky in the looks department. I don’t think I have ever been focused on particular public figures and gone, “Wow that is what women should look like.” Just today at the gym there were three women, they all look pretty different, they’re all “good” as far as I am concerned.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

TexasMom1216 said:


> Kate Beckinsale. I wish I could take her picture to the plastic surgeon and order all of that. But yeah, they’re both kind of older but in their day, perfect. Margot Robbie is another that is perfect.


Kate is solid 7, Maggie is 7 too I reckon. Nina Dobrev I would say 9 and Mila Kunis I would say 8. It's all subjective!

That random Kazakh girl I posted is 10/10 for me. She has all the features I like, round face, dark eyes, long black hair, long slim tall physique.


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

ccpowerslave said:


> I am really not that picky in the looks department. I don’t think I have ever been focused on particular public figures and gone, “Wow that is what women should look like.” Just today at the gym there were three women, they all look pretty different, they’re all “good” as far as I am concerned.


You are the exception to the rule.


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

heartsbeating said:


> This is turning into comparing oneself with others. Can other people be viewed as stunning without comparison to ourselves? Whether putting oneself down or boosting oneself up?


I think there is an objective answer which is what you would get by crowdsourcing in a large group.

The trouble is what you describe.

A “looks only” objective rating is worth exactly nothing. What is important is how they interact with you (and others). An objective 10 who can’t communicate isn’t really a 10 as a partner, it’s a facade of a partner.


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

TexasMom1216 said:


> You are the exception to the rule.


Probably. I do a lot of math and stuff like that where I deal with abstractions and groups.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

heartsbeating said:


> This is turning into comparing oneself with others. Can other people be viewed as stunning without comparison to ourselves? Whether putting oneself down or boosting oneself up?
> 
> I was reflecting on a party we recently went to. Talking with an objectively attractive young woman, and what made her stunning to me was that her social interaction / skills were full of consideration and warmth. She’s in her skin; I’m in my mine. I did embed, to a degree, how she navigated the conversation between us as I respected that. Then another woman, older than me, again demonstrated warmth and I also perceived her as stunning. I enjoyed the feeling of ease with her and with our conversation; which initially started by way of her light-heartedly making fun of me that we both laughed about. I learned a bit about her and through that, in a sense, there was some comparison yet in a way that I found inspiring. I didn’t compare my appearance with theirs. What purpose would that serve to myself or them?
> 
> Yes, Margot Robbie is objectively physically attractive. I don’t look like her. She doesn’t look like me. So what?


I compare, I just don't take it personally if I'm not as muscly or good looking as other guys. I have my market and so happens it's the market I want so yay  

I'm sure I get swiped left all the time because I'm Asian and furthermore not one of the muscly ones but who cares?


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

ccpowerslave said:


> Probably. I do a lot of math and stuff like that where I deal with abstractions and groups.


I give math a 1 out of 10. 😂


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

TexasMom1216 said:


> I give math a 1 out of 10. 😂


So mean 😭


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

ccpowerslave said:


> I think there is an objective answer which is what you would get by crowdsourcing in a large group.
> 
> The trouble is what you describe.
> 
> A “looks only” objective rating is worth exactly nothing. What is important is how they interact with you (and others). An objective 10 who can’t communicate isn’t really a 10 as a partner, it’s a facade of a partner.


I probably lose many points when women find out looks are important for me but who cares. Personality is subjective too.

With one other lady I'm chatting to, shallowness -5 points, honesty/self-awareness +6 points, NET PROFIT! 😝


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## pastasauce79 (Mar 21, 2018)

TexasMom1216 said:


> You are the exception to the rule.


The majority of my ex-boyfriends were not good looking. I really practice what my Catholic upbringing taught me. I met the guys, and rated them based on their personalities. I don't regret dating them. They were very good to me and I fell in love with a couple of them. I'm still FB friends with them. My mom was frustrated I dated them. I also dated very handsome men. I'm also friends with them on FB. I have to say they have aged very nicely! And my mom can't believe I didn't marry one of them! 🤣 But she really thinks I married the best man out there. 

People's personalities are very important to me, but physical appearance has become important because I've aged and I think it's important to feel physical attraction in a relationship. It's not a one size fits all though. I think one should feel physically attracted to the person you want to date. 

I don't compare myself to other women because no one look like me. I'm not perfect and I will never be. I'd rather eat and do whatever makes me happy than worry about looking like a VS model. I don't even wear makeup so vanity is the not my thing.


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

ccpowerslave said:


> So mean 😭


I’m glad you do math because I do not.


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## gaius (Nov 5, 2020)

RandomDude said:


> Kate is solid 7, Maggie is 7 too I reckon. Nina Dobrev I would say 9 and Mila Kunis I would say 8. It's all subjective!


I always thought Ashton Kutcher was a moron for losing Demi Moore and having kids with Mila Kunis. Don't get her appeal at all. Talk about a downgrade.

I don't use the number system but definitely have a hideous category. Women who are so ugly they give me shivers when I look at them. Besides Khloe Kardashian a few of them are on a show called 90 day fiance right now.










Coincidentally they're all dating black guys. Guys who I admire for being able to get an erection for them. I'm not that virile. Don't think taking Viagra and Cialis at the same time would even help me in that situation.


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

pastasauce79 said:


> I think one should feel physically attracted to the person you want to date.


Agreed, that makes sense as a romantic relationship should also be physical why would you enter it with no attraction? As a purely transactional arrangement sure I guess but that doesn’t seem very fulfilling.

I’d also way rather my wife eat a burger and fries than eat salad everywhere and walk around starving. I mean there are limits and what not and you gotta keep things sensible both man and woman but I know how hard it is for people to stay in top condition and unless that is your thing it’s not worth it. Trying to get motivation to train harder now while I’m killing it at work and it’s just not coming.


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

Numb26 said:


> But everyone's idea of physical perfection is different


I don't even think most of us are striving to find 'physical perfection' in another - I mean, what even is that anyway? If one was to consider that as a concept, it would discount and discard a huge amount of the population for various reasons. By the way, I'm not disagreeing with you @Numb26 as I feel that I understand the intention of your words. Granted, I'm not naive to the fact that value is often placed on being objectively physically attractive (by dominant cultural standards). However, maybe I have a personally skewed view of the world yet in terms of relationships, I think people (men and women) are less superficial than how it can come across on the interwebz; as in daily life encounters. Eep. I can almost hear the snickers upon writing that. I acknowledge that I don't know what it's like to date in our current time, and the seemingly countless 'options' of people through dating apps, and that my perception is likely skewed by those around us/me in general life. Yeah, I may be unqualified to spout such a view.

As for @RandomDude, and being a single man exploring dating again, he's wired towards a specific aesthetic and happens to openly share that here. I was tempted to comment about the photo of the 70 year old, however, I just recognize that he's in a different mindset to me. Plus, I do also have a general aesthetic that I lean towards as being sexually appealing; and which accounts for the vibe of the person.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

gaius said:


> I always thought Ashton Kutcher was a moron for losing Demi Moore and having kids with Mila Kunis. Don't get her appeal at all. Talk about a downgrade.


Downgrade? That's an upgrade. Again, subjective.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

heartsbeating said:


> As for @RandomDude, and being a single man exploring dating again, he's wired towards a specific aesthetic and happens to openly share that here.


And I acknowledge it's not everyone's cup of tea but I celebrate that. I'm just wired the way I am and others are wired the way they are, different stars sparkle for different people!

And when people find each other:





Win!


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## bobert (Nov 22, 2018)

Yeah Mila Kunis is far more attractive than Demi Moore. Pretty big age difference as well, no? Not sure what the appeal is with Kutcher though.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

bobert said:


> Yeah Mila Kunis is far more attractive than Demi Moore. Pretty big age difference as well, no? Not sure what the appeal is with Kutcher though.


His height? 

Tall dudes always get +2 free points at least. It's not fair, but that's life!


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## gaius (Nov 5, 2020)

RandomDude said:


> Downgrade? That's an upgrade. Again, subjective.
> 
> View attachment 88856


Yes, always subjective. But I don't look at that picture and see a stunning woman. I see the girl next door. I see girls that attractive walking around all the time .And pair that with her annoying voice and personality, you'd have to be crazy to chase little kids around with her when you could be having uninterrupted sex and adult vacations with Demi Moore.

Just my subjective opinion.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

gaius said:


> *Yes, always subjective. But I don't look at that picture and see a stunning woman. I see the girl next door. I see girls that attractive walking around all the time .*And pair that with her annoying voice and personality, you'd have to be crazy to chase little kids around with her when you could be having uninterrupted sex and adult vacations with Demi Moore.
> 
> Just my subjective opinion.


So if I move into your neighborhood I would be in heaven!  

Though I only find Mila Kunis attractive aesthetically. Gweneth Paltrow I don't like her features but she's got the legs.


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

RandomDude said:


> His height?
> 
> Tall dudes always get +2 free points at least. It's not fair, but that's life!


I need those +2 to get out of the cellar.


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## gaius (Nov 5, 2020)

RandomDude said:


> So if I move into your neighborhood I would be in heaven!
> 
> Though I only find Mila Kunis attractive aesthetically. Gweneth Paltrow I don't like her features but she's got the legs.


I live in a college town so those girl next door, short hair types are a dime a dozen. My old regional manager used to go to a certain restaurant for lunch when he was here simply because all the girls would walk by it on their way to class. I'll give you the address if you're ever over here.  

And Demi Moore is a unique beauty. She's almost 60 years old and still has it going on. If Mila can look half that good with all the plastic surgery in the world when she's 50 I'll be shocked. Ashton is going to be looking at a babushka before he knows it!


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

Numb26 said:


> I'm a -7. Makes life easier


Piss off! 😎

Quit beating yourself. Life will do that without your help.

Your a stud. Live it 😉


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

snowbum said:


> I think people will agree Giselle and cindy Crawford are most mens perfection, are they not?


Cindy is certainly attractive and I don't know who Giselle is.

Mrs. Conan is the extremely attractive to me however.

I get distracted just by her walking around in my sight.

(She's short and not a model)😋


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

RandomDude said:


> View attachment 88850
> 
> 
> Gotta admit... 9/10
> ...


Oh hell no!😳


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

ccpowerslave said:


> I need those +2 to get out of the cellar.






gaius said:


> I live in a college town so those girl next door, short hair types are a dime a dozen. My old regional manager used to go to a certain restaurant for lunch when he was here simply because all the girls would walk by it on their way to class. I'll give you the address if you're ever over here.
> 
> And Demi Moore is a unique beauty. She's almost 60 years old and still has it going on. If Mila can look half that good with all the plastic surgery in the world when she's 50 I'll be shocked. Ashton is going to be looking at a babushka before he knows it!


Eh? To each their own. I would still swipe left to both lol, Mila would make me pause, then I scroll down to the height then swipe left 😅 Both will swipe left to me too guaranteed lol


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## Sfort (Sep 28, 2019)

After I reached 50, my rating started dropping like the stock market. Actually, I've never had anyone give me a rating (to my face). I've had a lot of relationships and am presently married, so I must have scored well enough in some people's minds.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

ConanHub said:


> Piss off! 😎
> Quit beating yourself. Life will do that without your help.
> Your a stud. Live it 😉


He gets laid way more than he gives himself credit for 😅



ConanHub said:


> Cindy is certainly attractive and I don't know who Giselle is.





ConanHub said:


> Oh hell no!😳


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

Demi has way more grace in her movements.

Mil is cute though.😉


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## Skookaroo (Jul 12, 2021)

Is it rude? Kinda yeah. It’s turning a whole human person into a number based on how pleasurable they are to your eyes with no regard to who they actually are or the rest of their humanity.

No. I wouldn’t post pictures of myself online to be rated. For what purpose would anyone do that unless they are insecure and seeking unhealthy validation of some kind?

That being said, I wouldn’t lose my wits if someone rated me, and I wouldn’t get offended if someone rated me low. But I’m very secure in myself so.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

ConanHub said:


> Demi has way more grace in her movements.
> 
> Mil is cute though.😉


Meh, both too short. Gweneth Paltrow has the best legs as far as your western women go. 5'9 is ideal. 










This better not turn out into a boob vs butt vs leg thread! We already have one of those haha


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## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

As a male, strictly by looks only, whenever I want to rate a woman, I prefer to look at her mother if possible to have an idea where that rating is going.

At 18-25, they all look marvelous, even the ugly ones. After 25 you start to stick a fork on a lot of them.

As a male, I did my best between 26-45 after that stick a fork on me.


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

RandomDude said:


> Meh, both too short. Gweneth Paltrow has the best legs as far as your western women go. 5'9 is ideal.
> 
> View attachment 88864
> 
> ...


Yeah but Gwyneth has the I.Q. of a carrot.....😳


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

ConanHub said:


> Yeah but Gwyneth has the I.Q. of a carrot.....😳


Sure but in terms of pure aesthetics we can admit she has great legs 

I keep intelligence/personality/integrity out of my /10 rating scale.









For dating a woman has to have 7+ in intelligence lol - 8+ in personality, 9+ in honesty I don't care about morality - that's relative.
But all that is after at least 7+ in face, 7+ in body. And it's ALL subjective!

I used to want only 8+ but now I'm older so my standards dropped preferences have been widened.


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

RandomDude said:


> Sure but in terms of pure aesthetics we can admit she has great legs
> 
> I keep intelligence/personality/integrity out of my rating scale.
> 
> View attachment 88867


Eliminating other attributes, Gwyneth is extremely attractive physically.

I have no idea about her personality but she is provably stupid.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

ConanHub said:


> Eliminating other attributes, Gwyneth is extremely attractive physically.
> 
> I have no idea about her personality but she is provably stupid.


It's the hair isn't it? What if she has like genius level IQ 😅 

Probably not though I googled can't find it lol


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Also, what you guys think of this:



https://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/real-life/news-life/playboy-model-claims-her-good-looks-prevent-people-from-taking-her-seriously/news-story/01f65b9f4f408f537ac1bf3233d258ef


*Playboy model claims her “good looks” prevent people from taking her seriously*
A Playboy model has opened up about being “beautiful” – claiming her good looks cause jealousy and prevent her from being taken seriously.

😅


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## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

Gwyneth is beautiful (with her mom how could she not be) but she’s obnoxious. She’s also my age. But she has access to surgeons I can’t talk my H into. You’d think he’d be for it, right? I don’t understand the resistance.


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

TexasMom1216 said:


> Gwyneth is beautiful (with her mom how could she not be) but she’s obnoxious. She’s also my age. But she has access to surgeons I can’t talk my H into. You’d think he’d be for it, right? I don’t understand the resistance.


Blythe Danner is ridiculously good looking and has an incredible name to boot.


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

RandomDude said:


> Also, what you guys think of this:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Naww ...life's tough.


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

_“The glamour girls, the girls with the big boobs and big butts and bikinis, these are the people who are investing in their communities, they’re trying to make a difference, and it’s because they’re so used to so much ridicule for being beautiful or having the bravery to wear what they wanted and not shield their beauty."_

The main reason I can't take any of that seriously is the way in which she is using her 'platform' that also subscribes to the very things that she is 'complaining' about. Rather than say, I don't know, using it to campaign for more accessible sidewalks in her community. Inferring that she is among those 'trying to make a difference' well, what is that exactly? While stereotyping does happen, "ridicule for being beautiful or having the 'bravery' to wear what they wanted and not shield their beauty" ...is just laughable to me.

Edit - I read a bit more and apparently she has 'a huge platform to push feminism and speak out against domestic abuse'. I wonder how that translates to actual tangible difference in someone's life. And so it turns out, last line of her bio (following mention of her degree, and how mostly her looks gained attention that has led to her career alongside social media savvy) states 'Since the beginning of the pandemic, her business has raised and donated over $10,000 for various humanitarian efforts including disabled veterans, marginalized communities and coronavirus relief efforts.' I still stand by my thoughts at the beginning of this post. For what it's worth, I don't have a problem with her doing what she does and capitalizing on her looks to do so; rather, I think what was expressed in the linked article is comical. Still, she be making that money. And a lot more than me!


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

Oh no... I'm entering a ranty moment on the internet... how can one donate towards supporting veterans who are living with a disability and then talk about glamour girls and such having the 'bravery' to wear what they want and not shield their beauty. Fk me. I'm shaking my head.


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## joannacroc (Dec 17, 2014)

bobert said:


> Yeah Mila Kunis is far more attractive than Demi Moore. Pretty big age difference as well, no? Not sure what the appeal is with Kutcher though.


He used to be a model. He's physical attractive but some of the appeal is lost for me when he speaks. He's down to earth which is nice, but doesn't come across as very cerebral..


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## joannacroc (Dec 17, 2014)

There's a lid for every pot. People find different things attractive. Generally, physically fit and healthy people tend to be more universally attractive but there are cultural differences in what people find hot. Then there are the quirks. I don't feel it's quantifiable for me. It's a yes or no feeling, not a sliding scale. Voice and scent seem to be 2 things that change the equation for me a lot.


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## Hiner112 (Nov 17, 2019)

It's kind of funny how divergent ratings can be. For instance, when I was going to school I was given volunteered "ratings" of a sort. It was often to the effect that I wasn't on the scale at all. That no one would date me unless I was the last guy available or that I wasn't a "real boy" or whatever.

Then I started dating my ex who said that a couple dates in she saw me shirtless and decided in that moment she had to have me. Similarly, I've had a few "my eyes are up here" kinds of moments with my current GF.

So depending on perspective I'd be somewhere between 0 and 8 or 9 (graded on a curve for age at this point).


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

joannacroc said:


> Voice and scent seem to be 2 things that change the equation for me a lot.


This.

I have posted it many times here but if you take the hottest girl out there and give her Hillary Clinton’s voice no way.

As for Mila vs Demi you need to compare at the same age. They both look good however I would say Mila has been “tiny” so if I had to pick based only on looks I’d probably pick Demi.


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## pastasauce79 (Mar 21, 2018)

ccpowerslave said:


> Trying to get motivation to train harder now while I’m killing it at work and it’s just not coming.


I don't train, but my rec center membership is collecting dust because I don't have time or motivation right now. Ice cream and Netflix are my thing now a days 🤷🏻‍♀️


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## Livvie (Jan 20, 2014)

ccpowerslave said:


> This.
> 
> I have posted it many times here but if you take the hottest girl out there and give her Hillary Clinton’s voice no way.
> 
> As for Mila vs Demi you need to compare at the same age. They both look good however I would say Mila has been “tiny” so if I had to pick based only on looks I’d probably pick Demi.


If Ashton wanted bio kids, he wasn't going to be able to have them with Demi. Mila is 20 years younger than Demi.

If you compare Demi and Mila at the same age, I think Demi wins by a million. She's beautiful and I love her voice.


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## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

Livvie said:


> If Ashton wanted bio kids, he wasn't going to be able to have them with Demi. Mila is 20 years younger than Demi.
> 
> If you compare Demi and Mila at the same age, I think Demi wins by a million. She's beautiful and I love her voice.


Her in Disclosure, not gonna lie, pretty good (evil through)…


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## Quad73 (May 10, 2021)

Enigma32 said:


> Meanwhile, I think most people in my area are probably below average in looks compared to other places.


The 6+ ones all moved to Beach123-ville


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