# Bad dream, just looking for opinions --not about dream



## merri (Jan 3, 2012)

I had a dream last night of my worst fear. I dreamt I asked hubby straight out if he still wanted to be with me and he shrugged and his shook his head no. I awoke crying.

We've been married 15 years and have an 11 year old. I love him and adore my son. I have struggled with anxiety and depression and it has fluctuated alot since the birth of my son.
We haven't been close in months and I would just be happy with a hug (maybe the medicine) but I always need affection. He doesn't seem interested in me. I'm scared we've gone too far.
We have a trip for my son's sport next week so I don't want to say anything yet. 
Any ideas, any key things I left out? I don't want this to end. I want a marriage and family back.


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## Kevinb (Jan 8, 2012)

Well firstly, it was a dream. I know that women can lose their libido when on antidepressants. This may sound a bit graphic but have you tried seducing him or just going down on him when he was asleep....something out of the ordinary which would give him a shake up and make him take note


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## merri (Jan 3, 2012)

Yes I have and the last time I felt like he was uncomfortable. So now it's been since Nov. I guess I should try again


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## Kevinb (Jan 8, 2012)

He's a lucky guy to have a wife to make that sort of an effort. How long has it been since the intimacy has been gone and what do you put it down to. Are you both still in good shape and find each other attractive?


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## SockPuppet (May 16, 2011)

You say you need affection. Maybe he feels that you need too much affection, and is pulling away a bit?

And I know you arent specific about the dream, but Ive read that if you dream your spouse is cheating, it means you truly believe they will never cheat. Some sort of subconcious thing involving trust, comfort, etc. Maybe it works with your dream too.


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## merri (Jan 3, 2012)

We are both fit and in reasonably good shape and in good health. I think the issue is arguments never resolving, just stewing. There is a lot of tension in the air.


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## Kevinb (Jan 8, 2012)

merri said:


> We are both fit and in reasonably good shape and in good health. I think the issue is arguments never resolving, just stewing. There is a lot of tension in the air.


How did your school trip go and how are you progressing?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## andeypandy (Jan 19, 2012)

Start off by doing something really nice for your husband. Men like to be romanced too.

Buy him something nice.
Make him his fave dinner
Buy him tickets for his fave sport and offer to go with him

Dont say anything. You've been down, he knows. How about trying to put focus on him a bit? It will make you feel better.

Your sexual drive may be down, but that doesnt mean you cant please him sexually still. I am a woman too, so I know how it works. You dont have to be in the mood to give.


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## X-unknown (Oct 14, 2011)

I don't know if this helps but for a while our problem was based on hormones and believe it or not it was mine going sub par. I went on Androgel and that really helps. Its also good for mood etc. Thats not to say you can't be depressed or have anxiety AND have hormone problems. If I can I would suggest a long visit for both of you at the doctors to rule out medical or mental issues. 

The other suggestions are good as well but it might fall on deaf ears if its medical /mental heath stuff.

Good Luck.

*P.S. It all was a dream that started this so remember "it was a dream"


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