# Living together but now she wants more child support



## plomito (Apr 7, 2015)

In need of some good advice:

The wife and I we been discussing divorce for a while now but we live in NYC and apartments are very expensive here, so we decided to split bills and help each other with that and the children until we both find something affordable. I been keeping with my side, I pay half of the rent, pay the cable in full and other utilities plus buy groceries and things needed in the house. We had a fallout like 7 years ago and she took me to child support and after we fixed things, I never went back to get the support off. Instead I let it be since she is the one that takes the children to school and I get pay more than her. 

Now we have a third child but he isn’t in the child support case and she took me to child support stating that her income has gone down and expenses up (again, we live together and I even took couple of loans to pay some backed up rent, and recently took a withdrawal from my 401k) she herself have received couple of promotions and make good money. Since the boy (now 2) was born I added him to my insurance and been providing but now I’m afraid she is trying to collect like I haven’t helped this last two years, and I noticed this because the letter for the court date was mailed to her mother house. 

I want to prove in court that we live together but again, I am open for some advice from those with knowledge or anybody that can point me in the right direction. I am getting a lawyer, but I know things will get bad between us, but I am trying to protect my income.

** I am not trying to avoid paying child support for all my three children, but i want what is fair for both of us.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Do you have a lawyer?

The process should allow you to provide the financial information that you have.

You might want to start putting your info together so that you are ahead of the game.


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

Lawyer time.

Sorry, but this is something anonymous advice on the net just won't cut the mustard!

She sounds bat$hit crazy !


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

You should put all your efforts into reconciling with her . Move mountains. 

You screwed up and i assume never made a real effort to change


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## plomito (Apr 7, 2015)

blueinbr said:


> You should put all your efforts into reconciling with her . Move mountains.
> 
> You screwed up and i assume never made a real effort to change


I tried everything possible to fix things, but there is only so much one can do when the other person does not want to fix things. I am sorry but i can't spend my entire life apologizing while she is always trying to screw me over. I devoted more than enough time to show her how much i wanted her back in my life. Now is time to move on and continue with my life and be the best father possible and try to find happiness. It might not be what others want to hear, but i cant keep swimming against the current.


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## plomito (Apr 7, 2015)

EleGirl said:


> Do you have a lawyer?
> 
> The process should allow you to provide the financial information that you have.
> 
> You might want to start putting your info together so that you are ahead of the game.


I'm starting to look for one but wanted to find out if somebody had experienced this before or had some knowledge. 

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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

plomito said:


> I tried everything possible to fix things, but there is only so much one can do when the other person does not want to fix things. I am sorry but i can't spend my entire life apologizing while she is always trying to screw me over. I devoted more than enough time to show her how much i wanted her back in my life. Now is time to move on and continue with my life and be the best father possible and try to find happiness. It might not be what others want to hear, but i cant keep swimming against the current.


Does she want a divorce? How is she screwing you over?


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## plomito (Apr 7, 2015)

blueinbr said:


> Does she want a divorce? How is she screwing you over?


She started the petition, and she is screwing me because all the expenses we go half and half and now when she filed for child support she filed like I haven't giving her a penny. Thank God I do everything through my bank, all the rent payments, bills everything I paid I don't give her cash. 

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## Malpheous (May 3, 2013)

So you aren't divorced? You're still married? Living together. Also paying CS to her? 

Get a lawyer. Yesterday. 

Gather every ounce of documentation of cohabitation and financial care you've provided for the household. Gather evidence of her living there with the children and yourself.

You have a mess.


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## plomito (Apr 7, 2015)

Malpheous said:


> So you aren't divorced? You're still married? Living together. Also paying CS to her?
> 
> Get a lawyer. Yesterday.
> 
> ...


I know..

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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

In my state the court suspends child support if the parents are living together. A friend of mine moved in with his Baby Momma after child support had been established. They were trying to give it another go. Anyways, after a year he found out that she hadn't informed the court he was living in the home and the child support had been adding up the whole time. To make a long story short, it took a court appearance and much documentation for him to prove to the court that he'd been living in the home and providing for the children. Once proven, the court then reduced his support arrears by the appropriate amount.


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