# Please Help...I'm so loss.



## Mick85 (Oct 13, 2011)

Last Thursday my husband asked for a divorce. We've been married for almost 7 years. I was COMPLETELY stunned and shocked when those words came out of his mouth. He never once showed any signs that he was unhappy. We've been together since we were 18. High school sweet hearts if you may. 

My husband is in the Army and has been to Iraq and Afghanistan three times and he finally in the last two days admitted he has been dealing with issues from his deployments. I knew that he has had some close calls but I never knew the depth and guilt he has been feeling for years. He says that I have not done anything; that this is all him. He says he is unhappy, and he doesn't know why. And he doesn't know what will make him happy. He has said that part of it is because I'm the only woman he has ever been with, and I guess he wants to know what the grass is like on the other side. We are stationed overseas which makes this ten times worse because if he wants to separate I have to leave. Period. Yesterday I got him to go with me to see the chaplain and we talked with him. I left with some hope. He has moved into the barracks, but he has not let his command know anything. He comes here everyday so we can talk, but his job is so demanding we have barely been able to.

My husband is a good man, and is being very respectful and caring. He has said that I am too good for him and he doesn't deserve me. We haven't shouted not once, since he told me he wanted a divorce. But at the same time, I am getting very mixed signals from him. He says he wants to separate, but he doesn't know what he wants. He tells me he loves me......

I asked him if he wanted me to just leave and he says he doesn't know. Our Chaplain suggested we go on a date, and he agreed to go on one this Saturday. 

I love this man with every fiber of my being. I would do anything for him. I'm so loss, and confused and hurt. I want to fix this so bad. I also talked with our Chaplain one on one and he thinks my husband is depressed and needs to see someone professionally. I just don't know what to do.


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## chattycathy (Aug 19, 2011)

He must have a certain woman in mind.
Men don't leave wives just because they have never dated another.
They leave because they are involved with another woman or are pretty sure they could be real darn soon (they have already crossed lines).


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## Ten_year_hubby (Jun 24, 2010)

Start with Tip 1 here: Marriage Saving Tips To Get Your Relationship Back On Track


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## aug (Aug 21, 2011)

Or, he could had seen so much death and horrors that he has become numbed.

Has he been checked for Post Traumatic Stress?


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## Mick85 (Oct 13, 2011)

He swears on his life that there is no one else. But he has admitted that there could be and he doesn't want to hurt me like that. When they return from deployments they are asked question and they see someone; but he has not been open with them so he has never seen anyone one on one for what he is dealing with. I believe he is dealing with PTSD and Depression and its finally got to the point where he just can't deal with it anymore.


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