# I'm at a loss...



## thelaststraw (Aug 13, 2014)

So, I am husband number 3... Third times a charm? For who? Definitely not me it seems.

I've gotten to the point where I am ready to call it quits. We have a blended family, her 3 and my 2 (part-time only). There's just been a rash of unmitigated crap. I've certainly made my mistakes but I don't think that I can put up with being treated like I am anymore.

When I get into an argument, I do not talk to the person I am arguing with as if I hate them. I do not get the same treatment - and it's exhausting. I've gotten to the point where I am no longer going to let this person have any influence in how I feel.

One of my favorites - my lovely ex is playing some games and sending my daughter to the wrong school. This is to keep her in the school she was in last year. I'm a little pissed about the lying going on over there and was going to bring it to light. Now - summer has this thing where people at schools work minimum hours (go figure) so it has been hard to talk to the right people. It all really wasn't coming together until this week. I started a phenomenal new job a couple weeks ago and have been consumed with that during the work day (go figure - I work at work). My Not-So-Dear-Wife mentions the daughter/school thing this morning and expresses exasperation at the fact that it hasn't been resolved. Fast forward to me getting home after being gone 12 hours (like every other day) and she's all frosty with me. I then tell her that my polite "Oh I was focused on work" was really "I'M WORKING".

She then tells me that apparently we have different priorities.

I was dumbfounded. Yes - at work my priority was...wait for it....wait for it.....WORK.

I'm not perfect but I'm tired of not measuring up....


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## 2xloser (May 8, 2011)

Well  you're venting, which is fine and cool; TAM is a great place to vent and have people "listen"... but did you have question or need input on something in particular?

One thing I know we have in common is we've gotta figure out a way to choose better romance partners, have a long-term view on people and be willung to turn and walk away earlier, when those tell-tale signs of problem in the making start kicking up...


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

How long have you been married to #3?

The two of you clearly have communication issues. Sounds like it's time to tell her that both of you have to go to marriage counseling. IT's not going to get any better if you both don't work to make it better.

How many hours a week do you work?

Does she have a job outside the home?


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## WolverineFan (Nov 26, 2013)

Have you contacted a counselor? There is lots of help available for couples in your situation if you are willing to find it. A blended family puts stress on a marriage that is already fighting uphill. I know of a free counseling service, of some good books, and other recommendations. I will pass them on if you send me a private message.


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## Counterfit (Feb 2, 2014)

I think some part of you knows that you are destined to be her "Former Husband #3"............and you now see the reason why there have been two divorces in her past.

Forget the marriage counseling........find a lawyer and get yourself out of this mess.


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## slimstickums (Aug 14, 2014)

thelaststraw said:


> So, I am husband number 3... Third times a charm? For who? Definitely not me it seems.
> 
> I've gotten to the point where I am ready to call it quits. We have a blended family, her 3 and my 2 (part-time only). There's just been a rash of unmitigated crap. I've certainly made my mistakes but I don't think that I can put up with being treated like I am anymore.
> 
> ...


You have to remember that in a healthy marriage your spouse/family are number1 and should be considered first, of course this goes for both spouses.
Just my 2 cents worth not judging


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