# Do you go crazy without sex?



## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

So it's been 8 months coming nine that I've managed to stay away from sex/relationships/whatever. I'm coping... though sometimes I need to rant. Does sexlessness drive you bonkers eventually? Unless one is a monk?

How do you guys cope?


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## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

Not really.
When I was single there were times I went for long periods without sex. Not that it wasn't available , but just wasn't interested and preferred to DIY.
But there is a difference between unable to get , and choosing not to.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

It's strange for me at the moment, I feel the cravings for it yet I no longer find the idea of casual sex appealing when the opportunity presents itself. At the same time I also have no interest in getting involved with anyone (emotionally that is) let alone commit or re-commit.

So it's like I'm stuck, my balls thinking one thing and my brains thinking another. It comes and goes though, today I'm feeling this way, tomorrow I'll be back to normal and hardened up again. It's like I'm having wild unstable mood swings.

Tis weird =/

And hell quite frankly a part of me is quite annoyed about how I handled STBX last week because I've effectively robbed myself of sex with a trusted and talented partner. Even if it was perhaps the honorable thing to do as to not lead her on.


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## ReformedHubby (Jan 9, 2013)

I have noticed that when I go more than three days without it I start to sweat the small stuff, which is a relationship killer. If I were married to a LD woman the poor gal would probably feel nit picked to death. Which would be ironic because my behavior due to of lack of sex would become the reason why I would no longer be getting any. But, luckily my wife and I are compatible in this department so I rarely go more than three days without unless I'm ill or on travel.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Three days... heh

I find this so ironic now, for over 5 years I had sex pretty much whenever I wanted even if it was demanded from me, and since I joined this forum I complained about too much sex. Now I seem to have gone bonkers over no longer having sex at all for almost a year, and there's nothing I can do to fix it as random fks no longer interest me and I'm not interested in becoming collared again either.


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## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

There are times we have gone for an entire week without sex.
But we always physically close though. Hugging , light kissing ,touching etc.
If I don't get that type of affection I will go crazy!


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

I've gone months (up to a year) in my former marriage. It can drive you crazy, unless you learn to cope. I meditated, and took up a bunch of hobbies and activities. My best coping mechanism in that situation was to divorce her so I could pursue sex. That worked great!


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## committed4ever (Nov 13, 2012)

Well we're about to find out! Because sex this morning cause some serious contraction (not the real thing not spaced right) and I don't think I can handle this again. So 3 more week before due date plus 6 weeks after. YIKES!


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## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

Like your new avatar committed4ever!


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

> There are times we have gone for an entire week without sex.
> But we always physically close though. Hugging , light kissing ,touching etc.
> If I don't get that type of affection I will go crazy!


Funny, I actually managed it when I was married =O



Married but Happy said:


> I've gone months (up to a year) in my former marriage. It can drive you crazy, unless you learn to cope. I meditated, and took up a bunch of hobbies and activities. My best coping mechanism in that situation was to divorce her so I could pursue sex. That worked great!


Heh yeah, starting to realise now celibacy is harder than I thought (probably because it's the last day of the month adding to my marathon!!!)

And can't divorce till next year 



> Well we're about to find out! Because sex this morning cause some serious contraction (not the real thing not spaced right) and I don't think I can handle this again. So 3 more week before due date plus 6 weeks after. YIKES!


Ouch...


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## committed4ever (Nov 13, 2012)

Caribbean Man said:


> Like your new avatar committed4ever!


Thanks CM. Hopefully I won't be using it too much longer!


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## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

When I was in my late twenties, I couldn't have regular sex for two years because my ex was working in China. I did go crazy. I was so horny that I was masturbating three times a day. I even went to a Chinese medicine doctor to ask her to prescribe some medicine for me to control my desire. But the best medicine was to find someone to have sex.


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## Horizon (Apr 4, 2013)

greenpearl said:


> When I was in my late twenties, I couldn't have regular sex for two years because my ex was working in China. I did go crazy. I was so horny that I was masturbating three times a day. I even went to a Chinese medicine doctor to ask her to prescribe some medicine for me to control my desire. But the best medicine was to find someone to have sex.


Makes sense to me. I go nuts just thinking about it


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## richie33 (Jul 20, 2012)

Yes....I am like reformed hubby,if we go a few days without any intimacy I go a little bat sh*t. But I am also like CM as long as there is affection, hugging, kissing,etc I am good.


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## ReformedHubby (Jan 9, 2013)

richie33 said:


> Yes....I am like reformed hubby,if we go a few days without any intimacy I go a little bat sh*t. But I am also like CM as long as there is affection, hugging, kissing,etc I am good.


Both are important. I remember before I got married the minister pulled me aside and told me to make sure that I touch my wife in a non sexual way at least twelve times a day. He said if I did that I would never have problems with a lack of sex. Apparently he was right. Of course now I know that those tingly touchy feelings are just biochemistry, but they definitely do the trick as far as keeping us bonded to one another is concerned.


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## Wiltshireman (Jan 23, 2013)

This rings a bell for me as my wife is still recovering from surgery so a full sex life is out of the question at the moment. We are still close in other ways but if I feel I need some physical release I can take care of it myself.

Even within the healthiest relationships there will be periods when one partner is not able to fulfill the desires of the other but as long as they communicate this and the reason for it effectively to their partner it need not be a problem. 

As for the OP I commend you in showing restraint when it comes to casual sex, to me it is something that should be shared only as part of a committed relationship and “playing the field” or “one night stands” devalues it. (IMHO).


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## Wiltshireman (Jan 23, 2013)

This rings a bell for me as my wife is still recovering from surgery so a full sex life is out of the question at the moment. We are still close in other ways but if I feel I need some physical release I can take care of it myself.

Even within the healthiest relationships there will be periods when one partner is not able to fulfill the desires of the other but as long as they communicate this and the reason for it effectively to their partner it need not be a problem. 

As for the OP I commend you in showing restraint when it comes to casual sex, to me it is something that should be shared only as part of a committed relationship and “playing the field” or “one night stands” devalues it. (IMHO).


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## I Notice The Details (Sep 15, 2012)

OP, I admire that you didn't go back to your ex for sex only. It would give the wrong impression and open a can of worms that you have already closed. Save your energy and lust for your next relationship. 

In the meantime, Keep Calm and Polish The Stallion When Necessary.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Thanks, but no good deed goes unpunished it seems.

Oh well, time to keep choking my chicken with my hands. At least until someone worthwhile comes along, bah... but I'm too picky.


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

Used to go crazy. Now, I just get disgusted and pissed.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Ey? You get disgusted over having no sex? :scratchhead:


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## SadSamIAm (Oct 29, 2010)

I am with unbelievable. It is very hurtful to be in a marriage where your partner doesn't care about your happiness. It used to make me crazy. Now it makes me mad and bitter.


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

RandomDude said:


> Ey? You get disgusted over having no sex? :scratchhead:


Give it a few years.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Eh? If I give it a few years at this rate I might end up like this:


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## DesertRat1978 (Aug 27, 2013)

In my early 20's, I went 2.2 years without sex and it did not affect me all that much. I could have gotten it had I pursued it but I was too busy hating the other half of the species to care. 

Now, I have a wife and am going on 13 weeks without sex and have to say it dominates my mind sometimes. Some days, I am just at a loss at how I can be married to someone and be so celibate. To answer the OP, I think that going without sex can make you a bit bonkers. However, I do not think it is because of lack of intercourse but rather lack of bonding/intimacy/etc.


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## CarefulinNY (Sep 30, 2013)

tyler1978 said:


> In my early 20's, I went 2.2 years without sex and it did not affect me all that much. I could have gotten it had I pursued it but I was too busy hating the other half of the species to care.
> 
> Now, I have a wife and am going on 13 weeks without sex and have to say it dominates my mind sometimes. Some days, I am just at a loss at how I can be married to someone and be so celibate. To answer the OP, I think that going without sex can make you a bit bonkers. However, I do not think it is because of lack of intercourse but rather lack of bonding/intimacy/etc.


Sorry to hear that. 13 weeks is rough. That would dominate my mind at all times.


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