# DIY Online advice?



## sheldon64 (Mar 24, 2018)

I have decided to use an online service for our uncontested divorce and I wondered if anyone had any experience or advice. I wanted to use 3 step but they don't handle Arkansas anymore due to courts being fussy causing them to have to refund people so I am using complete case. I just wanted to know if I should list my 401k, vehicles, debts, etc in the paperwork or not?

We don't have any kids and rent a house and agree on everything. She is keeping her debt and I am keeping mine, she's keeping her car and I keep mine, not touching each other's 401k. I want to keep it as simple as possible since the courts in Arkansas are already against people filing it themselves so would there be any harm in not listing the 401k's, vehicles and stuff since we are not technically "splitting" them? Once the paperwork is completed and everything is over she wouldn't be able to come back and try to fight for anything not listed?

Thanks for any information.


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## SunnyT (Jun 22, 2011)

I did a DIY divorce in Tx. The judge in this county required my papers to at least be looked at by an atty. It cost me $75 for that. Not a big deal.

So do it how you want, and maybe just run it by an attorney before you file. Really, if its uncontested it probably won't matter. Especially if you both sign off on a marital settlement agreement.


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## SpinyNorman (Jan 24, 2018)

Short answer: If you're not telling the whole truth, run it by a lawyer.

Long answer: Divorce laws vary by state and I don't live in AK. But my atty told me if I didn't disclose everything, nothing was binding and she could come back at me unless she stipulated she didn't care what I had. Is there something on the form where you can stipulate you don't care what the other person has in their 401K? Whatever you're going to pay an atty for a consult is cheaper than having the the whole thing voided b/c you left something out. This is not the time to be penny wise and pound foolish.


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## SunnyT (Jun 22, 2011)

An attorney can also tell you how judges in your county deal with divorces. One atty I talked to said that in my county the judges were by the book, but that the judges in the next county would almost always honor a marital settlement if both parties agreed.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Schedule some appointments with 2 or 3 attorneys who will give free initial consultations. Many will give half hour to one hour consultations for free in hope that you will hire them. You can ask questions in the consultation. .. for example 

"If we agree that each of us keeps the assets and liabilities in our own name, do we really have to list them? Or can we use a general statement?"

If the lawyer says you have to list them all, then ask "can we just list the item but not the balance? e.g. "401K, owner Sheldon"

Another thing you might want to ask about is if you two agree to each assume any bills in your own name, can creditors still come after you to pay her bills if she defaults. In a lot of states, this is how it works. Creditors are not party to your divorce and any bill made during marriage, even if in only one name, belongs to both parties.

However student loans only belong to the person who made the student loan.

Why are you reluctant to list the assets and bills?


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*It can never hurt to have an attorney review your paperwork and to render advise on possible courts in your jurisdiction/county in which to legally file in!

Penny-pinching really has no place here! Get your uncontested divorce going as efficiently as you can!*


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## sheldon64 (Mar 24, 2018)

Thanks for the information.

I was just wanting to make the paperwork as simple as possible. I've already paid the $300 for the detail instructions on how to fill it out, didn't want to find a lawyer as well. 

Sounds like it will be worth the risk of making things complicated to make sure everything is listed. I"m not trying to hide anything, the courts hate people doing it themselves so I wanted it to be open and shut.

Everyone makes it sound so easy to talk to lawyers, I called seven of them before finally finding one that told me I didn't really need a lawyer and I could do it myself. Her fee for an uncontested divorce (which I assumed was just looking over paperwork) was $1500. I guess I was asking for the wrong thing, I asked for a mediator which I thought was a lawyer for both parties, maybe I should have asked for an arbitrator? What do I ask for to have them just review paperwork? It seemed like all the people I talked to were only interested if I planned to hire them to represent me.


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## Hopeful Cynic (Apr 27, 2014)

sheldon64 said:


> Everyone makes it sound so easy to talk to lawyers, I called seven of them before finally finding one that told me I didn't really need a lawyer and I could do it myself. Her fee for an uncontested divorce (which I assumed was just looking over paperwork) was $1500. I guess I was asking for the wrong thing, I asked for a mediator which I thought was a lawyer for both parties, maybe I should have asked for an arbitrator? What do I ask for to have them just review paperwork? It seemed like all the people I talked to were only interested if I planned to hire them to represent me.


A mediator is a lawyer who does mediation, which is to get two disagreeing parties to meet in the middle and come to an agreement. An arbitrator is like a mediator, except if there's anything you just can't come to an agreement on, they will make the decision for you. If you already agree, you don't need a mediator or an arbitrator.

In my neck of the woods, you each need a lawyer to sign things off saying they have offered you independent advice and you have a legal understanding of what you're signing.

I would think that you have to list everything, all your assets and debts, even though you agree you're not dividing them evenly. Financial disclosure is an essential part of a legal agreement. You can't legally agree to something you don't know. Maybe you wouldn't be so keen to agree to each keep your own 401k if you knew hers was ten times yours, and you were entitled to half of it, for example.


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