# Been awhile.



## ahhhmaaaan! (Mar 26, 2011)

Hey, TAM.


Two years ago today, my world came crashing down with one swift blow. Like many here, I found this place while seeking answers to my dilemma...mainly the "WHY's." Many of you may remember how devastated and hurt I was. I can very well tell you that the pain of infidelity is the worst I have ever encountered in my life; nothing will ever be the same for me again-- _that's for DAMN sure! _


Well...two years and an ex-wife later, things are going well. After a few stumbles, I think I can finally move on. A recent situation arose where my interaction with the aforementioned person could've either sucked me back into a state of "toxicicity;" or forever free me from the personal hell that _was_ my former life. 

I chose to completely walk away from this situation, as I could not help this person with her grief concerning the dissolution of our relationship. I say _relationship_ because a marriage consists of two people: _it was more than marriage._ The effects of the affair destroyed EVERYTHING, as families were divided, friends were lost, and most of all the bitter, stale taste of infidelity will forever resonate with those involded; as well as the loved ones who bared witness. 


When I say things are good, it comes to mean that I feel this tragic episode can finally be put behind me. I've moved on in many so many ways. 


I was *ahhhmaaaan!* once. I chose to walk away, and I'm good with that.


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## keko (Mar 21, 2012)

I wasn't a member when you were posting your story but read it after it was linked to another thread, so I'm glad you're doing much better!

Just out of curiosity, has your ex's behavior changed or is she still in her old ways?


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## WyshIknew (Aug 18, 2012)

Would you like to elaborate? Or is this on another thread.

I think I read your original threads.


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## workindad (May 7, 2011)

I am happy for you. Keep up the positive progress.

wd


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## AngryandUsed (Jun 23, 2011)

Ahmaaan,

Good to know that you are doing better. I have not read your thread. Around the time you became member of TAM (March 2011), I was struggling.....

I did not know TAM existed. I was an emotional wreck. I was begging my wife not to leave me. I was desparate to work out things. I was desparate for my kids.

I had no affair. She had.

It is always good to look back, and review the journey.

I hope you are doing well.

By they way, did you R or D?


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## ahhhmaaaan! (Mar 26, 2011)

Thank you for all the positive feedback.


@Wysh- Elaborate? Well, let's just say I'm in a good place right now. I'm in the company of a _certain_ someone, and I'm starting to feel like I can be happy once again. 

The sinking feeling of dread - as if the bottom is about to fall from beneath me - doesn't overwhelm me as much. 


I've since deleted my threads. After combing over them, I realized they were a bit too detailed. I even referred to my ex-wife by name in one of them.


@keko- As for her behavior... I really don't know. I cut off all contact with her and her family. I know she's been depressed for quite some time and has resorted to some extremes in her coping. I really don't want to get into that aspect of this situation, as it is very personal. 


@Angry- I walked away. I chose to D. 

I wouldn't say it's _all __"good"_ recalling my ordeal, but I see what you mean. I've come a long way in two years.


With that being said, I'd like to leave you with a little something that's helped me move on. 

Separator - Radiohead - YouTube

_Like I'm falling out of bed from a long and weary dream
Finally I'm free of all the weight I've been carrying_


I don't plan on being a regular contributer, so this is most likely my past post. Thank you all.


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## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

Could somebody please post a link the story?


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## BjornFree (Aug 16, 2012)

ahhhmaaaan! said:


> I don't plan on being a regular contributer, so this is most likely my past post. Thank you all.


ahhhmaaaan.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

Well as you can see this site has taken off especially here in CWI... unfortinately.
Alot of folks need help, so I hope you stick around.

There are young folks that are still just kids (no offense) that are getting screwed by there disloyal spouse while they are serving our country, there are guys sharing there wifes right infront of there noses (and kids) when they come home frome work, there are folks working on false R and don't even see it, there are folks that have been married for years and just can't find there self respect.

Your perspective and experience are invalueable so please give it....it seems to be much needed these days.


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## Louise7 (Nov 8, 2012)

Good to know that there is light at the end of the tunnel. I wish you a safe journey to your new life.


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## YinPrincess (Jul 31, 2011)

Glad to see a positive update! 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## mdnuojame (Dec 24, 2012)

I think I read your original threads.


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