# My husband left through severe depression



## TV123 (Jun 13, 2020)

This January my husband told me, out of the blue, that he was feeling really depressed and suicidal, I then told him to stay at his dads for the weekend to clear his head and just relax and have a break. So the next day he got up for work, kissed me on the head in the morning and went to stay at his dads after work. I was a few weeks away from having our 6th child which he begged me to have, as I didn’t want anymore children. He said he wanted to get better before the baby was born so he could come home. It’s been been 4 and half months and he still hasn’t returned. As the weeks went on he got worse and worse. He seeked treatment straight away and is on medication and goes to therapy. However after he started medication he started saying his lost all his feelings and doesn’t feel the same way about me now. Although he says he doesn’t want to feel like that and he wants to be able to feel everything so he can come home, but he just can’t. He keeps saying he’s really trying and doing his best to get better but he said because it’s not fair on me so it might need to be over incase his feelings never come back. He did say the other day he wants to ask me to wait till his better and not move on but he feels selfish asking. I’m just really heartbroken by it all and I’m finding it really difficult because we were so in love before this, he always treated me amazing and vice versa. This has come as a complete shock. His depression has come from stress at work, me having a difficult time with my pregnancy and our youngest child was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. So everything just got on top of him. But I’m just so confused and worried his feelings for me might never return. I just need some advice or if anyone has been through a similar situation, how did you handle it? Anything would be greatly appreciated.


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## GC1234 (Apr 15, 2020)

Thank you for sharing with us. I would say, wait it out a little longer, and let's hope he comes around...sometimes medication takes time to kick in. You can certainly come up with a time frame in your head, for example, give him until a certain time/date, and then move forward (with your life) if you can. I can't imagine having 6 kids is easy to deal with, but I would imagine your husband would support you guys financially at least, because he is the one saying he doesn't feel the same, etc. And listen, sure work is stressful for everyone, and plenty of kids and adults have type 1 diabetes, it's treatable, it's not that serious. It doesn't excuse your husband's actions. He's going to have to somehow come up with better coping mechanisms.


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## TJW (Mar 20, 2012)

GC1234 said:


> work is stressful for everyone, and plenty of kids and adults have type 1 diabetes, it's treatable, it's not that serious. It doesn't excuse your husband's actions.


Correct. Your husband is giving himself a blatant excuse to avoid responsibility. It's tough for us all, sometimes.... he needs to learn to base his life on FACTS, not "feelings"....

His "depression" is nothing but a pity-party. The drugs don't work on that.

FACT is, he is married with six children, to someone he promised that he would never do this to. The promises don't contain anything about "feelings".


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