# What do men find pretty?



## EllaSuaveterre (Oct 2, 2016)

This morning as my husband was up darting about the house getting ready for work, and I came over to him to greet him with a kiss and a cuddle, he took my waist and held me and told me I looked pretty. I'm currently suffering _hysterical affectations_, and my face looks like that of a smallpox victim, so at first I thought he didn't mean it, that he was being flippant. I averted my gaze and said, "Don't tease me." But he told me he really meant it, and that while he always thought I was pretty, my skin was glowing somehow, and looked brighter today. I appreciated the compliment very much, and told him so as I squeezed and nuzzled him. But sometimes I really don't understand the mind of a man.

I could spend three hours one day preparing for an evening out and have to _ask_ him when I emerge from our shared boudoir how I look. Another day I could easily be mistaken for homeless, and _that's_ the day he sees fit to compliment my appearance. Did he just see that my self-esteem could use a boost or do you think he really meant it when he called me pretty?


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

EllaSuaveterre said:


> This morning as my husband was up darting about the house getting ready for work, and when I came over to him to greet him with a kiss and a cuddle, he took my waist and held me and told me I looked pretty. I'm currently suffering _hysterical affectations_, and my face looks like that of a smallpox victim, so at first I thought he didn't mean it, that he was being flippant. I averted my gaze and said, "Don't tease me." But he told me he really meant it, and that while he always thought I was pretty, my skin was glowing somehow, and looked brighter today. I appreciated the compliment very much, and told him so as I squeezed and nuzzled him. But sometimes I really don't understand the mind of a man.
> 
> I could spend three hours one day preparing for an evening out and have to _ask_ him when I emerge from our shared boudoir how I look. Another day I could easily be mistaken for homeless, and _that's_ the day he sees fit to compliment my appearance. Did he just see that my self-esteem could use a boost or do you think he really meant it when he called me pretty?


Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.Some men don't like women wearing a lot of makeup or spending hours getting ready,some men love to see their partner dolled up to the nines,it's just being a man.He may have been feeling horny at the time or maybe he did want to give you a boost to your ego.My gf is seven months pregnant and to me she is the most beautiful woman I have ever seen.


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

Men are all different, so what they find pretty will vary. If your DH said you looked pretty, believe him!

DH actually HATES visible make up both because of how it looks and how it smells and tastes. He flat out said so and meant it! For a man like my DH, a woman in a ponytail with a freshly scrubbed face wearing jeans and a t-shirt is prettier than a runway ready super model.


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## release2016 (Dec 30, 2016)

FACT - Some babies are prettier than others, but to their parents who love them, they are the prettiest/most beautiful baby on the planet. 

OP Maybe your skin isn't at its best right now - but that doesnt stop your H appreciating how lovely you are inside and/or out. Lucky you!


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## _anonymous_ (Apr 18, 2016)

If your husband is anything like me, levels of attentiveness can vary by the day, based on life circumstances such as what's going on at work. This variation leads me to not noticing my wife's appearance as much, and perhaps noticing it at peculiar times that lead to her suspicions around the authenticity of my compliments.

There is also the aspect that Andy noted, how men and women's perception of beauty can differ dramatically. A good example is makeup. My wife presumes she looks awful without it, whereas I've always preferred her natural beauty.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

EllaSuaveterre said:


> This morning as my husband was up darting about the house getting ready for work, and when I came over to him to greet him with a kiss and a cuddle, he took my waist and held me and told me I looked pretty. I'm currently suffering _hysterical affectations_, and my face looks like that of a smallpox victim, so at first I thought he didn't mean it, that he was being flippant. I averted my gaze and said, "Don't tease me." But he told me he really meant it, and that while he always thought I was pretty, my skin was glowing somehow, and looked brighter today. I appreciated the compliment very much, and told him so as I squeezed and nuzzled him. But sometimes I really don't understand the mind of a man.
> 
> I could spend three hours one day preparing for an evening out and have to _ask_ him when I emerge from our shared boudoir how I look. Another day I could easily be mistaken for homeless, and _that's_ the day he sees fit to compliment my appearance. Did he just see that my self-esteem could use a boost or do you think he really meant it when he called me pretty?


*When I come to love someone, their looks and physical appearance is a rather remote characteristic compared to what I find within their heart or in their personality. 

And while physical appearance is rather nice, it is that deeper, personality and empathetic bond that they exude that I value so much more! In truth, I think that what ultimately attracts us is that complex combination of both the physical and the psychological characteristics!

But I think that I subscribe more to the "beauty is only skin-deep" axiom!

And God only knows that if some woman is going to be able to fall in love with an old fart like me, that she'll have to subscribe to it too! *


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## EllisRedding (Apr 10, 2015)

When my wife has minimal makeup on, no jewelry, hair up in a pony tail or the front pushed back b/c she has her glasses pushed up on her head, I will take that any day of the week over the dolled up look (no disrespect those those who like to go all out with makeup and jewelry, just not my thing).

I also find @arbitrator extremely pretty. :x


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Eyes


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

EllisRedding said:


> I also find @arbitrator extremely pretty. :x


*Jesus, Ellis! You need your damned eyes checked!*


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## EllisRedding (Apr 10, 2015)

arbitrator said:


> *Jesus, Ellis! You need your damned eyes checked!*


Those nudes you sent me yesterday beg to differ :wink2:


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

EllisRedding said:


> Those nudes you sent me yesterday beg to differ :wink2:


*Oh, you mean the ones of my RSXW?*


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## Bananapeel (May 4, 2015)

Emotional attachment completely affects how you view your spouse. Be glad he sees you that way.


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## dubsey (Feb 21, 2013)

I've talked about this with other people and we came to the conclusion that guys remember "looks", not as in the way you look, but the way you looked at them. 

There's a cute look my lady gives me, that, even after 20 years together, when I see it, it immediately makes me think back to the first time I saw it, and every time it happens, I see the way the 24 year old looked at me. The exact same eyes, and smile, and love. And sure, at 44, she may not look the same as she did at 24 after having a kid and life, and everything, but that look is the same, and it looks just as stunning now, as it did then, and makes her all the more beautiful.


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

A smile.


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## EllaSuaveterre (Oct 2, 2016)

dubsey said:


> I've talked about this with other people and we came to the conclusion that guys remember "looks", not as in the way you look, but the way you looked at them.
> 
> There's a cute look my lady gives me, that, even after 20 years together, when I see it, it immediately makes me think back to the first time I saw it, and every time it happens, I see the way the 24 year old looked at me. The exact same eyes, and smile, and love. And sure, at 44, she may not look the same as she did at 24 after having a kid and life, and everything, but that look is the same, and it looks just as stunning now, as it did then, and makes her all the more beautiful.


You know, I feel the very same way about my husband. He's 5'3 and bald, and rather lanky. Not that I've tried it, but I'm positive that I can fit into his clothes. I think he'd be quite psychologically wounded if I ever said it out loud, but he's not stereotypically handsome. I don't mean to insult him when I say it; it's a biological fact. I fully intend to live the rest of my fifty or sixty years with him and never, ever say as much to his face. I understand that lies of omission can be deadly to a marriage, but I don't think I will ever have the courage to tell him that, at least objectively speaking, he's not physically attractive.

But his smile-- oh my gods his smile more than makes up for it. He has round cheeks and when he smiles his face looks absolutely cherubic in a way that a more chiseled face couldn't imitate. And when he smiles at me his eyes turn up at the corners and they glow and sparkle in a way that I, a writer, cannot capture in words. His eyes are just overflowing with love; it emanates through his entire presence. And I much prefer the way he looks- the way he looks at me- to any muscle-bound hunk in the world. My husband is far less "handsome" and far more "cute". He is adorable, both in the sense that every time I see him I just want to squeeze him half to death and give him full-body cuddles, and in the sense that he has incredible capacity to be adored. I can't look at that face, those eyes, all that overflowing love, and not spill over myself. I love him and his sweet face for an atypical reason.


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## naiveonedave (Jan 9, 2014)

generalities: smooth skin, shape of face, relatively thin, curvy (hips to waist ratio), symmetrical features.....

Of course beauty is in the eye of the beholder. So some guys will prefer one hair color to another or slightly heavier or thinner, different eye color, etc.

part of the package is NOT physical. Smiling, happy, etc.


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## EllaSuaveterre (Oct 2, 2016)

EllaSuaveterre said:


> You know, I feel the very same way about my husband. He's 5'3 and bald, and rather lanky. Not that I've tried it, but I'm positive that I can fit into his clothes. I think he'd be quite psychologically wounded if I ever said it out loud, but he's not stereotypically handsome. I don't mean to insult him when I say it; it's a biological fact. I fully intend to live the rest of my fifty or sixty years with him and never, ever say as much to his face. I understand that lies of omission can be deadly to a marriage, but I don't think I will ever have the courage to tell him that, at least objectively speaking, he's not physically attractive.
> 
> But his smile-- oh my gods his smile more than makes up for it. He has round cheeks and when he smiles his face looks absolutely cherubic in a way that a more chiseled face couldn't imitate. And when he smiles at me his eyes turn up at the corners and they glow and sparkle in a way that I, a writer, cannot capture in words. His eyes are just overflowing with love; it emanates through his entire presence. And I much prefer the way he looks- the way he looks at me- to any muscle-bound hunk in the world. My husband is far less "handsome" and far more "cute". He is adorable, both in the sense that every time I see him I just want to squeeze him half to death and give him full-body cuddles, and in the sense that he has incredible capacity to be adored. I can't look at that face, those eyes, all that overflowing love, and not spill over myself. I love him and his sweet face for an atypical reason.



Oh wait. A few minutes after I posted that, I remembered I actually did tell him that I recognized that he wasn't stereotypically handsome. I told him a few months ago after several drinks. His response was that I actually rather insulted his intelligence by assuming that he didn't know. I told him that I knew he was aware of what he looked like, but I knew men want women who make them feel like Adonis. I wanted to be that for him. I forget how the rest of the conversation went but it didn't end on a sour note. It ended with cuddles, as most of our heartfelt conversations are wont to do.

The point of my writing this is to say that I honestly don't believe I have any secrets left that he doesn't know. He knows literally everything about me. Holy gods. Is that a good thing?


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## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

It's different on different women. Some have great hair, some a great smile. Some have really expensive eyes and some just the sound of their voice. 

The one constant I have found is that feelings up the pretty/sexy number a lot. When I was married to my x I honestly thought she was the most beautiful woman in the world. I was madly in love with her which lead that opinion. After she cheated it went down to a 4 on 10 scale. Objectively I am sure she is still pretty but to me she seems disgusting now. 

So my point being is your husband loves you. He probably does think you are pretty even if you don't feel it.


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## MarriedDude (Jun 21, 2014)

Long Hair+Tight Braids & knots + Tattoos and Bad Attitudes =Perfect Woman for Me


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

I see the subtle waves of heat rising from your form.
I see the smile behind your smile.
I see your aura turn red when I look you up and down.
I see your love for me. And my knees buckle. And my belt buckle........... opens on its own.

I see with my optic nerves. They are connected to my conscious mind. My "sub" conscious mind patrols the Medina Deep trenches in the Western basin of The Great Passion Ocean. My sub dumps its ballast and heads up at a 45 degree angle. Straight at your weak spot. Your soft under-belly.


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

MJJEAN said:


> Men are all different, so what they find pretty will vary. If your DH said you looked pretty, believe him!
> 
> DH actually HATES visible make up both because of how it looks and how it smells and tastes. He flat out said so and meant it! For a man like my DH, a woman in a ponytail with a freshly scrubbed face wearing jeans and a t-shirt is prettier than a runway ready super model.


Mine also isnt bothered about make up, which is good because I dont wear it.


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

MarriedDude said:


> Long Hair+Tight Braids & knots + Tattoos and Bad Attitudes =Perfect Woman for Me


That just goes to show that man are so different in what they find attractive. My husband would hate tattoos and a bad attitude in women.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

Diana7 said:


> That just goes to show that men are so different in what they find attractive. *My husband would hate tattoos and a bad attitude in women.*


*Any woman brave enough to come toward Ol' Arb with either of these will quickly find that they are a consummate deal breaker, at least in my book!*


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

arbitrator said:


> *Any woman brave enough to come toward Ol' Arb with either of these will quickly find that they are a consummate deal breaker, at least in my book!*


I am sure that many men feel like that. :smile2: 

My husband also finds modesty very attractive in a woman, he would be put off a woman if she dressed immodestly, swore, cursed, got drunk etc.


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## GA HEART (Oct 18, 2011)

One day I want to be swept up and told how pretty I am.


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## TX-SC (Aug 25, 2015)

I like natural, with only light makeup if any. Of course, if my wife wants to use it, I'm fine with that too. Generally, I am into naturally pretty without much fixing up needed. Even when she is at her worst, I find my wife sexy. 

Sent from my LG-US996 using Tapatalk


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## jld (Dec 1, 2013)

GA HEART said:


> One day I want to be swept up and told how pretty I am.


I hope that happens soon, GA Heart!


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## jld (Dec 1, 2013)

EllaSuaveterre said:


> Oh wait. A few minutes after I posted that, I remembered I actually did tell him that I recognized that he wasn't stereotypically handsome. I told him a few months ago after several drinks. His response was that I actually rather insulted his intelligence by assuming that he didn't know. I told him that I knew he was aware of what he looked like, but I knew men want women who make them feel like Adonis. I wanted to be that for him. I forget how the rest of the conversation went but it didn't end on a sour note. It ended with cuddles, as most of our heartfelt conversations are wont to do.
> 
> The point of my writing this is to say that I honestly don't believe I have any secrets left that he doesn't know. He knows literally everything about me. Holy gods. Is that a good thing?


Transparency in marriage is a _very_ good thing!


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## FrazzledSadHusband (Jul 3, 2014)

EllaSuaveterre said:


> This morning as my husband was up darting about the house getting ready for work, and I came over to him to greet him with a kiss and a cuddle, he took my waist and held me and told me I looked pretty. I'm currently suffering _hysterical affectations_, and my face looks like that of a smallpox victim, so at first I thought he didn't mean it, that he was being flippant. I averted my gaze and said, "Don't tease me." But he told me he really meant it, and that while he always thought I was pretty, my skin was glowing somehow, and looked brighter today. I appreciated the compliment very much, and told him so as I squeezed and nuzzled him. But sometimes I really don't understand the mind of a man.
> 
> I could spend three hours one day preparing for an evening out and have to _ask_ him when I emerge from our shared boudoir how I look.* Another day I could easily be mistaken for homeless,* and _that's_ the day he sees fit to compliment my appearance. Did he just see that my self-esteem could use a boost or do you think he really meant it when he called me pretty?


I always tell my wife she looks cute when she is laying down with her tired face half squished into her pillow and her hair all messed up. That is a intimate moment. I am seeing a side of her that no one else does. Lot's of people see her when she is all dressed up & out on the town. I get to see the private side of her.


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

There is not one ideal "pretty" for me - beyond a smile which is always good. There are a wide range of appearances that are each in their own way wonderful.


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## CanadaDry (Jan 17, 2017)

EllaSuaveterre said:


> This morning as my husband was up darting about the house getting ready for work, and I came over to him to greet him with a kiss and a cuddle, he took my waist and held me and told me I looked pretty. I'm currently suffering _hysterical affectations_, and my face looks like that of a smallpox victim, so at first I thought he didn't mean it, that he was being flippant. I averted my gaze and said, "Don't tease me." But he told me he really meant it, and that while he always thought I was pretty, my skin was glowing somehow, and looked brighter today. I appreciated the compliment very much, and told him so as I squeezed and nuzzled him. But sometimes I really don't understand the mind of a man.
> 
> I could spend three hours one day preparing for an evening out and have to _ask_ him when I emerge from our shared boudoir how I look. Another day I could easily be mistaken for homeless, and _that's_ the day he sees fit to compliment my appearance. Did he just see that my self-esteem could use a boost or do you think he really meant it when he called me pretty?


Believe it or not, some men don't sum up "attractive" as only being a woman's physical appearance. I appreciate my wife's sense of humor, her fiery retorts when I'm goofy to her, just her personality in general. All of that (and her appearance) makes me find her attractive. Something else, when someone is in love with you, it really doesn't matter what you look like. They've accepted you for how you are, how you look and they love you. Your husband sounds like a good man. Start believing in yourself and ditch the negativity about your appearance. Start believing you are beautiful. That's more of a turn on to a man than anything, at least it is to me.


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## Luvher4life (Jan 15, 2016)

It frustrates me when I say to my wife she's beautiful, only for the comment to be brushed aside with unbecoming comments like, "You're just saying that." Duh..., yes, I said it! AND I MEANT IT! A woman's self-image is almost always distorted by what she sees as flaws, when in reality, those "flaws" are part of what makes them beautiful in the first place. When you truly love somebody, you see them as they truly are, and beauty is not just what's on the surface.

My advice is to take your husband's word for it. Don't let your personally distorted self-image get in the way of taking an honest compliment to heart. Pride in personal appearance is one thing, but not "letting your hair down" without putting your guard up is self-defeating and unbecoming. Just let the beauty that is within you shine through, regardless of your outer appearance. Your husband appreciates it. Why can't you?


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