# Long Distance Emotional Affair?



## katesmama79 (Apr 8, 2010)

My husband and I have been married for 3 years. We didn't date that long before we were married. Prior to our relationship he had a 5 year friendship with a woman who lives across the country. This friendship began with her vacationing in his city, where they "hooked up." They haven't actually seen each other since, but have remained good friends via phone and internet ever since. I was okay with there friendship until I realized that she had no intention of extending that friendship to me. She became rude to me on I.M. when he wasn't home. She denied my friendship request on myspace, but when my husband discussed this with her insisted that she was sorry for the denial and that I misunderstood the rudeness. He sympathized with her, and took her side. They had conversations in which she nagged about how I just didn't understand their relationship. The final straw was last fall when I found a love letter from him to her, saying that he couldn't be friends with her because he was in love with her. Upon confrontation, he insisted that this was false and that this was a ploy to get out of ever talking to her again. He said that he was certain this would work and that if she ever did contact him I could do whatever I wanted, as far as contacting her or whatever. A few months later, she sent him a note on facebook. He responded, coldly, but didn't tell me, and now she has sent him a birthday message, which he replied by saying that he misses talking with her. Am I crazy? Should I let this go? I hate the fact that he takes her side and they make decisions regarding how to handle our relationship. He has other female friends, who have become my friends, and I am comfortable with that. What should I do?


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## sadandhurt (Nov 28, 2009)

This is a tough one. You have only been married for three years, and this would concern me. I feel the only reason I am still with my husband after 23 due to his emotional affair is because of the amount of years and two teenage daughters. I would tell him now that you will not tolerate this. You don't want to be where I am right now.


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