# The beta wife is the perfect wife



## Adex

Let's be honest. Isn't it much better to have a beta wife to be married to?

By this, I mean a girl who will cook for you, clean the house, take care of the kids, and love you for who you are. A girl that doesn't try to control you, nag you, or tell you what to do. Someone that listens to what you have to say, lets you make most of the major decisions, and follows your lead.

Someone that won't get mad when you go out with your friends, but will stay home with the kids. A wife that doesn't try to argue with you over bs and just gets along with you. Someone that will respect you and won't cheat on you. Most importantly, a wife that gives you sex and doesn't deny it.

Yes that is the ideal. My advice to all young men who are looking for a potential wife, LOOK FOR THAT. I'd say it's even good if she works and makes decent money. As long as her personality is beta.

My wife is a lot of that, but it would be nice if she was more beta.


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## Open up now let it all go

Is it me or are you overobsessed with alpha and beta rhetorics?


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## RandomDude

Erm, I don't think I can handle a yes-woman. Never have. Think I would go nuts, but that's just me.

But an alpha woman for me doesn't mean = biatch. So...


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## Adex

I'm not even trolling, I'm being serious. If I remove the terms alpha and beta while just describing what they are, I don't think I would get such a negative response.

However, using the greek letters explains it well enough. I don't see why women would be upset with that opinion either.


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## Faithful Wife

My naturally alpha husband loves me because I am not "too beta", as you described above.

He loves me because:

I will call him out on his crap.

I will not let him push me around.

I have my own interests, hobbies, friends, sports, activities.

I adore, love and cherish him, and make it clear to everyone that he is My Man.

I am deeply sexually attracted to him.

I only have eyes for him.

I respect him and enjoy his world views, even when we are not in agreement.

I stay attractive and interesting to him.

I have my mysterious side, which keeps him wanting to know more and more about me.

I have a dangerous side, there is a bit of a risk in being with me.

I make sure he meets his family obligations, so that he can get all those warm, loving fuzzies you get from doing them.

I am his intellectual equal and we make decisions using the Policy of Joint Agreement.

- - - - - 

And you're still wishing for "a wife that gives you sex and doesn't deny it"?

A wife that GIVES you sex?

You must not really understand how this whole thing works. No man should want a wife who "gives" him sex. He should want a wife who is sexual and is sexually attracted to HIM.

My husband would scoff at the idea of being "given" sex.


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## Mavash.

Let me get this straight. You want a happy accomplished homemaker, who loves sex, lets you go out with your friends while she stays home with the kids and you want her to make decent money too?

Good luck finding this cause she doesn't exist.

I'm as old fashioned as they come and even my husband doesn't get all this.


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## Adex

Mavash. said:


> Let me get this straight. You want a happy accomplished homemaker, who loves sex, lets you go out with your friends while she stays home with the kids and you want her to make decent money too?
> 
> Good luck finding this cause she doesn't exist.
> 
> I'm as old fashioned as they come and even my husband doesn't get all this.


I know it would be difficult to find someone like that. As long as she has a lot of those qualities, it would be good.


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## Maricha75

Yes! It has ABSOLUTELY been my lifelong dream to be a Stepford Wife! Sign me up! 

My husband would ask me wtf was wrong with me if I started acting like a brainless twit. But hey, to each his own.


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## 2ntnuf

No


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## Catherine602

Sounds reasonable to me. If there were boys with complementry characteristics, it would be a perfect world.


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## RandomDude

> My husband would ask me wtf was wrong with me if I started acting like a brainless twit. But hey, to each his own.


When my wife acts like a brainless twit it means only one thing...


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## Faithful Wife

Mavash said: "Let me get this straight. You want a happy accomplished homemaker, who loves sex...."

No, no no....she doesn't have to LOVE sex, she just has to GIVE him sex. It doesn't matter to him if she is having a good time or not, as long as she gives sex to him.


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## SpinDaddy

Meh, I’ve always been attracted to and respectful of the strong willed independent types. This Alpha/Beta stuff is a bunch of crap. What ever happened to honor, character and integrity?


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## RandomDude

Faithful Wife said:


> No, no no....she doesn't have to LOVE sex, she just has to GIVE him sex. It doesn't matter to him if she is having a good time or not, as long as she gives sex to him.


=/
Well that's no fun at all


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## Lyris

Heeheeheehee! 

Do you think about anything else?


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## Maricha75

RandomDude said:


> When my wife acts like a brainless twit it means only one thing...


:rofl::rofl:
RD, I think, in some ways, I like your wife. LOL!


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## Catherine602

Adex said:


> I'm not even trolling, I'm being serious. If I remove the terms alpha and beta while just describing what they are, I don't think I would get such a negative response.
> 
> However, using the greek letters explains it well enough. I don't see why women would be upset with that opinion either.


Wait, don't be so disingenuous, you wrote this to incite. I know you want a predictable girl for a wife but don't be so predictable yourself. 

One of you has to attract like minded couples for dinner and keep them from falling asleep from boredom. 

All your girls entertainment skills will go unnoticed and the cubed chedder cheese and saltine appetizer will go bad.


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## Coffee Amore




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## Cosmos

Faithful Wife said:


> No, no no....she doesn't have to LOVE sex, she just has to GIVE him sex. It doesn't matter to him if she is having a good time or not, as long as she gives sex to him.


She doesn't have to enjoy it, FW, because even if she did, and told him so, Adex doesn't believe women say (or know) want they want. :scratchhead:


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## stopandmakecoffee

Adex said:


> Let's be honest. Isn't it much better to have a beta wife to be married to?
> 
> By this, I mean a girl who will cook for you, clean the house, take care of the kids, and love you for who you are. A girl that doesn't try to control you, nag you, or tell you what to do. Someone that listens to what you have to say, lets you make most of the major decisions, and follows your lead.
> 
> Someone that won't get mad when you go out with your friends, but will stay home with the kids. A wife that doesn't try to argue with you over bs and just gets along with you. Someone that will respect you and won't cheat on you. Most importantly, a wife that gives you sex and doesn't deny it.
> 
> Yes that is the ideal. My advice to all young men who are looking for a potential wife, LOOK FOR THAT. I'd say it's even good if she works and makes decent money. As long as her personality is beta.
> 
> My wife is a lot of that, but it would be nice if she was more beta.


reading this i really don't know what to think , especially when i relate it to my marriage problem.
so man wants a 'servant', passive, like 'Yes,Sir' all the way, but also wants a woman who enjoys her own life, happy and content so she doesn't nag.

this is hilarious. and now i know why i don't want to involved in any relationship anymore


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## Catherine602

Faithful Wife said:


> Mavash said: "Let me get this straight. You want a happy accomplished homemaker, who loves sex...."
> 
> No, no no....she doesn't have to LOVE sex, she just has to GIVE him sex. It doesn't matter to him if she is having a good time or not, as long as she gives sex to him.


Having sex with a dead fish?


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## Toffer

Wow

I wouldn't want to be Adex right now!


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## RandomDude

@Maricha75

Heh yeah a part of me finds it funny too - only after I'm OUT of such a situation however lol!

@Thread



> No, no no....she doesn't have to LOVE sex, she just has to GIVE him sex. It doesn't matter to him if she is having a good time or not, as long as she gives sex to him.





> Having sex with a dead fish?


Reminds me of all the posts I've made trying to tell women to not forget the tease and how to present a challenge to their husbands because many men including myself possess the spirit of the hunter, and love the thrill of the chase.

I sure as hell wouldn't want it easy. In fact, sex is much harder nowadays with my wife and to be honest I actually quite like it. I haven't complained once lol - funny because I have been complaining for TWO years it was too easy lol!

Ironic really, but I guess different strokes for different men


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## working_together

Good luck finding a woman like that, most women today are fairly independent, and won't accept disrespect from their husbands.

Do you really want a doormat for a wife??? or do you want someone who can think for herself??? could get boring after a while....

just saying


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## RandomDude

What was that movie... with Eddie Murphy?

Ah yes, Coming to America:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pKYl6y8qGqw
That was awesome lol

LOL @ this scene too:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RXfLEoCMO3c

Come on Apex, thats not what you want is it?!


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## Pandakiss

Adex said:


> Let's be honest. Isn't it much better to have a beta wife to be married to?
> 
> By this, I mean a girl who will cook for you, clean the house, take care of the kids, and love you for who you are. A girl that doesn't try to control you, nag you, or tell you what to do. Someone that listens to what you have to say, lets you make most of the major decisions, and follows your lead.
> 
> Someone that won't get mad when you go out with your friends, but will stay home with the kids. A wife that doesn't try to argue with you over bs and just gets along with you. Someone that will respect you and won't cheat on you. Most importantly, a wife that gives you sex and doesn't deny it.
> 
> Yes that is the ideal. My advice to all young men who are looking for a potential wife, LOOK FOR THAT. I'd say it's even good if she works and makes decent money. As long as her personality is beta.
> 
> My wife is a lot of that, but it would be nice if she was more beta.




i cook and clean and tend to the kids, and greatly enjoy all aspects of sex, and would hate to turn it down, or to do something to put me in the spot to not get it.

i accept my husband for who he is, i fully understand he needs to be fully sleeved, he must feel like he is him......

that said...im a full alpha leo, i will call you out on bullsh!t, i aint no "yes sir", "no sir", "may i" type of b!tch. i have a brain, like to use it from time to time. if you gotta be you, then i gotta be me. 

i expect to be treated as an equal, not your personal ass licker/kisser. if you want a slave, then you are born in the wrong century, hows that time machine working to....

the last thing i can stand is a weak BETA MAN who cant handle a strong woman. what you are supposed to want is a down ass chick who will roll with you where ever you go, what ever you do, its supposed to be the 2 of you against the world, not you thinking you have this sudo power trip to lord over someone who you deem to be weaker.

now if you wanted to have a real talk about weather alpha men are more compatible with an alpha women or a beta woman....because alphas are loud and take charge, and maybe a woman who was beta could balance him out, and mello him slightly. that might have been a better take at this....but you didnt.

piss off, i doubt very much you are alpha, more like gamma, and i think you cape is tied a little too tightly---because gamma's only like to rescue the lady in distress, the once saved, dum-duma dum--off to save another one.


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## RandomDude

I did fall in love with my wife due to her intelligence, and she is quite smart (*ahem* except for that scam recently :slap: I still can't believe it... ). We can have deep conversations together and I can't live without that.

Besides I doubt deep inside Apex would want someone like that princess on the movie Coming to America. Perhaps he's just frustrated he's not getting laid... and perhaps that's just proof that a man with no sex goes crazy lol


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## Adex

I get laid enough and am content how my relationship is right now. 

I believe there's too much angry estrogen directed at me. One thing that I learned about being alpha, who cares what others think of me particularly over the internet. It's up to you if you want to agree with my opinion.


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## Maricha75

Adex said:


> I get laid enough and am content how my relationship is right now.
> 
> I believe there's too much angry estrogen directed at me. *One thing that I learned about being alpha, who cares what others think of me particularly over the internet.* It's up to you if you want to agree with my opinion.



Yea, it was "being alpha" that taught you that. Couldn't possibly have been life experiences. :rofl:

See, what I'm seeing in so many posts is a little boy who is playing at being a big boy. All in your perception, I guess.


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## aribabe

You guys leave adex alone
Lest he unleash the full awesomeness of his alpha unto you
Then you'll be sorry!


I've got your back adex















:rofl:
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## in my tree

"Angry estrogen"? How about bemused/amused estrogen. And it seems that some of the testosterone filled members are a bit puzzled as well.


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## Maricha75

in my tree said:


> "Angry estrogen"? How about bemused/amused estrogen. And it seems that some of the testosterone filled members are a bit puzzled as well.


Well, he has explained the testosterone already! It is because those men are "betas" of course! :rofl:


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## Adex

As I said, I'm learning to be more alpha. I never claimed to be a true alpha. It's actually not hard at all. What helped me is in my job, I was promoted to supervisor a few years ago. Being in my early 30s, I have to tell older people in their 40s and 50s what to do. 

I've learned to give orders in a firm, but respectful way and people follow. It does take skill, but I'd say this has helped me to be more of a leader. I've also learned not to care if people don't like me or don't like the orders I give in my job. In order to effectively run a department, you have to not care if people don't like you. 

I have carried this mentality into my marriage with good results. The point of my threads about alpha is to assist other men who might have fallen into the trap about being too nice. Being more alpha is something that CAN be learned.


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## ocotillo

How about sigma, for Stepford wife? 

Seriously, it sounds boring.


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## RandomDude

Well, I still don't get the appeal of yes-woman but I dunno, maybe that's just me.


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## SimplyAmorous

Some of the things they go on about "Stepford wives" probably fits me....I LOVE LOVE LOVE to please My husband..... *I enjoy it*....and I feel it is my place to make his life easier, he is the Bread winner and I've always felt his role is the more difficult between us. 

I do greet him at the door...well he comes to me too... I have a  on my face, and dinner is soon on the table... I have an older fashioned view of life & happiness....I give him a ton of sex (probably more than he can handle)...... I do all my household chores so he doesn't have to lift a finger (but I expect him to do the manly stuff - cause ...well...that is his place)... this has always worked well for us, never any fights. 

I love my husband and want to please him, make his life enjoyable... so he wants to come home to me, to our family. 

He treats *me* good ...damn good......I'd likely be a BI*CH to live with otherwise....I am not passive, a doormat, weak willed, weak minded.... I always know what I want, How I want it, and when I want it...I might not get it ...but I'll be darn persistent to bring it to pass. He said something like that to me the other day.

I've always been verbally assertive, can be confrontational, brash, feisty .....when I want to get something done, no grass grows under my feet. I tend to be the brain stormer between us as well.... so in this respect, I am not some small woman in our marriage - him running the whole show. I am an equal to him, a helpmate. 

My husband knows what makes me TICK, he keeps me very happy ...He is tipped more Beta, but he can handle me just fine... He treats me amazingly....and therefor he gets lots of lovin' in return. As is should be. 

I am very thankful for him being the way he is...and he wouldn't change me either.


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## Cosmos

Adex said:


> I get laid enough and am content how my relationship is right now.
> 
> I believe there's too much angry estrogen directed at me. One thing that I learned about being alpha, who cares what others think of me particularly over the internet. It's up to you if you want to agree with my opinion.


You think your behaviour is alpha? Wow!


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## Doc221

Morning Cosmos


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## EleGirl

Adex said:


> I know it would be difficult to find someone like that. As long as she has a lot of those qualities, it would be good.


So you want her work a full time job, clean the house, and take care of the children while you party. You don't want to help with any housework, child care, etc because you think that makes you beta.

Insulting to women.


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## oldgeezer

Adex said:


> Let's be honest. Isn't it much better to have a beta wife to be married to?
> 
> By this, I mean a girl who will cook for you, clean the house, take care of the kids, and love you for who you are. A girl that doesn't try to control you, nag you, or tell you what to do. Someone that listens to what you have to say, lets you make most of the major decisions, and follows your lead.


And when you start looking for someone exciting, rather than compliant.... then what?


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## EleGirl

I have 3 dogs... 2 males, one female.

The two males are pretty large... over 100 lbs. 

One's a lab/newfoundandler mix. He's he wise old man.

The other looks like a beauceron.. we think he's a German Shepard mix. I would never want to get in a fight with dog. Holy cow he's shred anyone/anything if mad. But otherwise he's a big baby.


Now the female.. the 50 lb Border Collie.. she's the alpha b!tch. She runs the males, she runs the humans and the house hold. She's in charge. Just ask her.

Even in nature the terms alpha and beta are not distinct to one animal in the pack or even to one gender. There can be more than one in charge .. more than one alpha ... each controlling/leading a different aspect of pack life.

This men must be alpha and women must be beta nonsense it just getting old.


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## EleGirl

SimplyAmorous said:


> Some of the things they go on about "Stepford wives" probably fits me....I LOVE LOVE LOVE to please My husband..... *I enjoy it*....and I feel it is my place to make his life easier, he is the Bread winner and I've always felt his role is the more difficult between us.
> 
> I do greet him at the door...well he comes to me too... I have a  on my face, and dinner is soon on the table... I have an older fashioned view of life & happiness....I give him a ton of sex (probably more than he can handle)...... I do all my household chores so he doesn't have to lift a finger (but I expect him to do the manly stuff - cause ...well...that is his place)... this has always worked well for us, never any fights.
> 
> I love my husband and want to please him, make his life enjoyable... so he wants to come home to me, to our family.
> 
> He treats *me* good ...damn good......I'd likely be a BI*CH to live with otherwise....I am not passive, a doormat, weak willed, weak minded.... I always know what I want, How I want it, and when I want it...I might not get it ...but I'll be darn persistent to bring it to pass. He said something like that to me the other day.
> 
> I've always been verbally assertive, can be confrontational, brash, feisty .....when I want to get something done, no grass grows under my feet. I tend to be the brain stormer between us as well.... so in this respect, I am not some small woman in our marriage - him running the whole show. I am an equal to him, a helpmate.
> 
> My husband knows what makes me TICK, he keeps me very happy ...He is tipped more Beta, but he can handle me just fine... He treats me amazingly....and therefor he gets lots of lovin' in return. As is should be.
> 
> I am very thankful for him being the way he is...and he wouldn't change me either.


I've read your posts here long enough to know that you are not a beta female. You are way to complex for that.


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## marycontrary

Ok... a couple things.

1) Calling yourself "alpha," is not very "alpha" of you. A rich man doesn't need to tell you he's rich...
(by the way, the idea of alpha vs. beta is a complete joke, snake oil, but since you want to play this game, i guess we can play)

3) In the past, I've had women that are the sweetest thing, but total pushovers, and it lasts for 3 months tops. I get tired of it. My lady challenges me every day. intellectually and sexually. With her, we both hit new highs, together. 

lol I don't even register for forums and whatnot, I just found this and thought I might try to disabuse you of this notion, for the betterment of the mens and the feminines. So really, I'm doing this for you. They say I have a heart of gold haha...

But if you really cling to the notion that you need a pushover, perhaps it means that it doesn't take that much to, um... overwhelm you intellectually?


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## EleGirl

Adex said:


> I get laid enough and am content how my relationship is right now.
> 
> I believe there's too much angry estrogen directed at me. One thing that I learned about being alpha, who cares what others think of me particularly over the internet. It's up to you if you want to agree with my opinion.


Yes it is up to me and I disagree! :rofl:


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## TiggyBlue

EleGirl said:


> So you want her work a full time job, clean the house, and take care of the children while you party. You don't want to help with any housework, child care, etc because you think that makes you beta.
> 
> Insulting to women.


Sounds like personal care more than a wife lol


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## EleGirl

Adex said:


> As I said, I'm learning to be more alpha. I never claimed to be a true alpha. It's actually not hard at all. What helped me is in my job, I was promoted to supervisor a few years ago. Being in my early 30s, I have to tell older people in their 40s and 50s what to do.
> 
> I've learned to give orders in a firm, but respectful way and people follow. It does take skill, but I'd say this has helped me to be more of a leader. I've also learned not to care if people don't like me or don't like the orders I give in my job. In order to effectively run a department, you have to not care if people don't like you.
> 
> I have carried this mentality into my marriage with good results. The point of my threads about alpha is to assist other men who might have fallen into the trap about being too nice. Being more alpha is something that CAN be learned.


Is your wife a SAHM or does she have a job outside the home?

To what extent do you do housework, grocery shopping, cooking, child care, yardwork, etc?


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## EleGirl

Maricha75 said:


> Well, he has explained the testosterone already! It is because those men are "betas" of course! :rofl:


The estrogen and testostrone in my body are at war because of this thread. But the progestrone cannot decide which side to align itself with.


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## EleGirl

Adex said:


> Let's be honest. Isn't it much better to have a beta wife to be married to?
> 
> By this, I mean a girl who will cook for you, clean the house, take care of the kids, and love you for who you are. A girl that doesn't try to control you, nag you, or tell you what to do. Someone that listens to what you have to say, lets you make most of the major decisions, and follows your lead.


I see your problem now. You want a "girl" not a "woman".


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## TeaLeaves4

EleGirl said:


> So you want her work a full time job, clean the house, and take care of the children while you party. You don't want to help with any housework, child care, etc because you think that makes you beta.
> 
> Insulting to women.


Blah. Let's not waste our breath. This one is a total dilhole and obviously no intellectual giant either.

Pass.


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## EleGirl

TeaLeaves4 said:


> Blah. Let's not waste our breath. This one is a total dilhole and obviously no intellectual giant either.
> 
> Pass.


Yea, I responded 'cause I was bored!!!


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## TiggyBlue

EleGirl said:


> Yea, I responded 'cause I was bored!!!


lol me too these kind of threads amuse me.


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## TeaLeaves4

EleGirl said:


> Yea, I responded 'cause I was bored!!!


Yep, and I don't believe he's married, either. I think he's still looking for his first real GF, can't get one, so he's flexing his muscles here.


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## RandomDude

Now I'm curious actually Apex,

I'm curious about your reasons to think about women this way, I had first thought that it's probably due to a dry spell but I guess not, so my apologies. In the end it's your cup of tea, but now I am rather curious.

So tell me - why would you want a yes-woman? 
Hell for me personality aside it's a sexual turn off, no tease, no challenge, no game.


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## EleGirl

TeaLeaves4 said:


> Yep, and I don't believe he's married, either. I think he's still looking for his first real GF, can't get one, so he's flexing his muscles here.


On his other thread about alpha guys, he states that he was a really nice guy in high school and college. 

He had a several girl friends and cheated on some of them.

But a couple of those girls cheated on him.. because he was not alpha enough.


Tell me... do nice guys cheat on their girlfriends? :scratchhead:


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## EleGirl

RandomDude said:


> Now I'm curious actually Apex,
> 
> I'm curious about your reasons to think about women this way, I had first thought that it's probably due to a dry spell but I guess not, so my apologies. In the end it's your cup of tea, but now I am rather curious.
> 
> So tell me - why would you want a yes-woman?
> Hell for me personality aside it's a sexual turn off, no tease, no challenge, no game.


See my post right above this one. 

He was a nice guy who cheated. 

But a couple of girls cheated on him .. he thinks because he was not alpha enough but was a "nice guy". :scratchhead:


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## Cosmos

EleGirl said:


> On his other thread about alpha guys, he states that he was a really nice guy in high school and college.
> 
> He had a several girl friends and cheated on some of them.
> 
> But a couple of those girls cheated on him.. because he was not alpha enough.
> 
> 
> Tell me... do nice guys cheat on their girlfriends? :scratchhead:


And on yet another thread he proudly told us that he told his wife to give him a BJ, then when she was done he told her "good job." Apparently this is how he thinks alphas make love...


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## TiggyBlue

Cosmos said:


> And on yet another thread he proudly told us that he told his wife to give him a BJ, then when she was done he told her "good job." Apparently this is how he thinks alphas make love...


:rofl:


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## stopandmakecoffee

Cosmos said:


> he told his wife to give him a BJ, then when she was done he told her "good job."


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## RandomDude

Wasn't going to say it but it sounds like he's struggling with his identity as a man in that case. Nothing wrong with that in my opinion as it normally happens from teens to young adulthood or young adulthood to mature adulthood. And he's probably reading too much on those "manhood" sites everywhere giving him mixed impressions. I'm guessing it's puberty, he sounds very young.

But these are just my assumptions, I await his response.



> And on yet another thread he proudly told us that he told his wife to give him a BJ, then when she was done he told her "good job."


... you have to be kidding me.
Ok now I have to read his other thread
EDIT: Errr, can't find his post =/

@stopandmakecoffee
:rofl: Nice one


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## SimplyAmorous

EleGirl said:


> I've read your posts here long enough to know that you are not a beta female. You are way to complex for that.


 Yes....Complex....Aren't we all. 

I feel strongly....so much of these things (this slanting towards Alpha /Beta traits)....are so much of our inborn temperaments ....and none is any better or worse (or less value) than the other...they are just *different*....we need to be matched with another who compliments what we are. 

Where we all go wrong is living out of the weaknesses of these temperaments.....

Introverted Phlegmatic temperaments are at the highest risk for being Doormats because of their natural passiveness...they strive for peace, they would rather go crawl under a rock than confront someone. They can overcome this but it's more WORK for them.

Extroverted Cholerics are prone to be "the Alphas" of our world .... due to their Leadership abilities & natural assertiveness ....but also prone to be Nasty Pricks/ the Boss from Hell - when they give in to their weaknesses. 

Me being a Choleric/ Melancholy... this makes it so I could make a fine female Drill Sergeant on the one hand...... then on the other...I can be this deeply Romantic / mushy, fiercely loyal...sweet & caring woman - when operating out of the strengths of the Melancholy....

Our temperaments are what makes us so complex, it helps to understand WHY we act the way we do...be aware of our weaknesses and build on the strengths. 








Chart here...


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## Cosmos

RandomDude said:


> Wasn't going to say it but it sounds like he's struggling with his identity as a man in that case. Nothing wrong with that in my opinion as it normally happens from teens to young adulthood or young adulthood to mature adulthood. And he's probably reading too much on those "manhood" sites everywhere giving him mixed impressions. I'm guessing it's puberty, he sounds very young.
> 
> But these are just my assumptions, I await his response.
> 
> 
> 
> ... you have to be kidding me.
> Ok now I have to read his other thread
> EDIT: Errr, can't find his post =/
> 
> @stopandmakecoffee
> :rofl: Nice one


Sorry, I got it wrong. It was a HJ:-



> BECOME THE ALPHA! Last night, I told my wife, "Give me a handjob" and she handled it without complaining. Then I complimented her telling her good job.
> 
> It's awesome. A few years ago, I was more beta and wouldn't have asked like that. Women love when the man takes the lead



http://talkaboutmarriage.com/mens-clubhouse/59611-becoming-alpha-24.html#post1198249


----------



## EleGirl

Cosmos said:


> And on yet another thread he proudly told us that he told his wife to give him a BJ, then when she was done he told her "good job." Apparently this is how he thinks alphas make love...


:rofl:


----------



## RandomDude

:rofl: 

Oh hell I think that post sums up this thread lol! Cosmos good call


----------



## EleGirl

Adex,

Ok we are giving you a hard time. The point is to just relax and enjoy your life with the woman you love. Do what comes naturally and be good to each other.

Quit trying so hard.

And don't order her to give you BJ's anymore... not attractive at all.


----------



## Cosmos

RandomDude said:


> :rofl:
> 
> Oh hell I think that post sums up this thread lol! Cosmos good call


It's actually sad, RD, because I think Adex might genuinely want to grow and improve (as we all should throughout our lives), but it appears that he's possibly misinterpreting or taking what suits him from the books he's reading, and ignoring some very important points.

Ellegirl, I think you're right. We are giving Adex a bad time, but some of his comments are just screaming for it.


----------



## WyshIknew

Toffer said:


> Wow
> 
> I wouldn't want to be Adex right now!


Unless he has an attention seeking problem!


----------



## RandomDude

I dunno, I felt bad for him at first, but come to think of it and after reading more... he does need it drilled in. Politely and respectfully though of course. Still won't stop me laughing out loud though lol but I have a very sensitive funny bone with facepalm threads


----------



## BjornFree

The perfect wife is a good looking, sex starved chef who owns a liquor store and also comes with a mute button.


----------



## RandomDude

Sh-t... now I can't take this thread seriously lol

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W-IPcVaif3Q
Skip to 0:30 
"Just pour my beer and get my smokes and go AWAY!" :rofl:

NOTE: Do not do this at home, just to put it out there for OP just in case lol


----------



## lalsr1988

Adex said:


> Let's be honest. Isn't it much better to have a beta wife to be married to?
> 
> By this, I mean a girl who will cook for you, clean the house, take care of the kids, and love you for who you are. A girl that doesn't try to control you, nag you, or tell you what to do. Someone that listens to what you have to say, lets you make most of the major decisions, and follows your lead.
> 
> Someone that won't get mad when you go out with your friends, but will stay home with the kids. A wife that doesn't try to argue with you over bs and just gets along with you. Someone that will respect you and won't cheat on you. Most importantly, a wife that gives you sex and doesn't deny it.
> 
> Yes that is the ideal. My advice to all young men who are looking for a potential wife, LOOK FOR THAT. I'd say it's even good if she works and makes decent money. As long as her personality is beta.
> 
> My wife is a lot of that, but it would be nice if she was more beta.



This is the only kind of woman I would marry, and that's exactly what I did.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## BjornFree

Faithful Wife said:


> My naturally alpha husband loves me because I am not "too beta", as you described above.


Funny, I notice that your posts are quite similar to Adex's. While Adex's posts seem to gush about his alphaness. Yours revolve around how your husband is "naturally alpha". Btw that was just an observation. The whole alpha beta topic is getting so stale.


----------



## lovelygirl

Adex said:


> Let's be honest. Isn't it much better to have a beta wife to be married to?
> 
> By this, I mean a girl who will cook for you, clean the house, take care of the kids, and love you for who you are. A girl that doesn't try to control you, nag you, or tell you what to do. Someone that listens to what you have to say, lets you make most of the major decisions, and follows your lead.
> 
> Someone that won't get mad when you go out with your friends, but will stay home with the kids. A wife that doesn't try to argue with you over bs and just gets along with you. Someone that will respect you and won't cheat on you. Most importantly, a wife that gives you sex and doesn't deny it.
> 
> Yes that is the ideal. My advice to all young men who are looking for a potential wife, LOOK FOR THAT. I'd say it's even good if she works and makes decent money. As long as her personality is beta.
> 
> My wife is a lot of that, but it would be nice if she was more beta.


That means men should marry a female robot who says "yes sir" all the time, be available at all times and by pressing the button she *gives* you as much sex as you want. 


I wonder why you bothered to marry a human in the first place and not a doll.


----------



## BjornFree

Adex said:


> I mean a girl who will cook for you, clean the house, take care of the kids, and love you for who you are. A girl that doesn't try to control you, nag you, or tell you what to do. Someone that listens to what you have to say, lets you make most of the major decisions, and follows your lead.
> 
> Someone that won't get mad when you go out with your friends, but will stay home with the kids. A wife that doesn't try to argue with you over bs and just gets along with you. Someone that will respect you and won't cheat on you. Most importantly, a wife that gives you sex and doesn't deny it.
> 
> Yes that is the ideal. My advice to all young men who are looking for a potential wife, LOOK FOR THAT. I'd say it's even good if she works and makes decent money.



I just modified the original post to edit out all the alpha beta references.

Yep, that is definitely wife material. Just add a humorous personality and I'd say that's pretty much the perfect wife. Now i'm not looking for perfection, I really don't mind the fact that my wife is quick to anger but she cools down just as fast. Most of those traits are definitely worthy of appreciation. 

Makes me wonder if the women are really up in arms against the poster and not the post itself.


----------



## SlowlyGettingWiser

> I've learned to give orders in a firm, but respectful way and people follow. It does take skill, but I'd say this has helped me to be more of a leader. I've also learned not to care if people don't like me or don't like the orders I give in my job. In order to effectively run a department, you have to not care if people don't like you.
> 
> I have carried this mentality into my marriage with good results.


Wow, Adex, you're right! It does sound GREAT to be you!

It also sounds like it must blow to be Mrs. Adex!

*Serious question here:* Do you EVER stop to consider what your 'marriage' is like for your wife?

If you want people to take you SERIOUSLY on this site, you should start understanding that MARRIAGE takes TWO people and you ALWAYS seem to consider YOURSELF ONLY. Every single posting of yours is ALWAYS about how YOU can get everything for YOURSELF with never a thought for anyone else in your life.

Your postings make you sound VERY immature and VERY selfish! That is WHY it is VERY difficult to take what you have to say with any ounce of respect. THIS *IS* a problem that you can 'fix' if you want to. Needless to say, you do not *HAVE* to change your mindset OR your posts. But, don't act so surprised and insulted when people (MEN as well as women, I might point out) make fun of your postings.

The women here aren't usually ANGRY about your posts (why should we be, you're not OUR husband and you're not a dictator setting 'marriage policy' for millions); we see you more as an extremely young man, inexperienced in the world of relationships, trying to give advice to people when that advice is OBVIOUSLY not based on extensive experience nor sound, well-thought-out ideas.

You remind me of CharlotteMarie without the extreme defensiveness! 


*


----------



## Dollystanford

what if you're a bit dumb and make really stupid decisions that have implications for your family. I mean what if what you have to say isn't really that great?


----------



## jaquen

Open up now let it all go said:


> Is it me or are you overobsessed with alpha and beta rhetorics?


He's obsessed with the attention he gets from TAM.

Truth be told there is a likelihood that this is neither a man, nor is this person married.


----------



## arbitrator

IMO you don't really have to be an "alpha" or a "beta" to be deemed "a doormat", _per se_, or for that matter, to even become a one. Say that you have two alphas who unite, then realistically, one of them will end up intrinsically outranking the other, thereby relegating the other partner into a state of "near-betahood."

Using that analogy, that would then turn that "alpha" into the "beta" and would more likely turn them into the resident doormat.

Even I cannot buy into that! I'd be far more prone to agree that you'll richly find "doormats" in all of those Greek letter categories, whether they are "alpha" or not!


----------



## trey69

Adex said:


> Let's be honest. Isn't it much better to have a beta wife to be married to?
> 
> By this, I mean a girl who will cook for you, clean the house, take care of the kids, and love you for who you are. A girl that doesn't try to control you, nag you, or tell you what to do. Someone that listens to what you have to say, lets you make most of the major decisions, and follows your lead.
> 
> Someone that won't get mad when you go out with your friends, but will stay home with the kids. A wife that doesn't try to argue with you over bs and just gets along with you. Someone that will respect you and won't cheat on you. Most importantly, a wife that gives you sex and doesn't deny it.
> 
> Yes that is the ideal. My advice to all young men who are looking for a potential wife, LOOK FOR THAT. I'd say it's even good if she works and makes decent money. As long as her personality is beta.
> 
> My wife is a lot of that, but it would be nice if she was more beta.


It doesn't sound like beta to me, is sounds like a doormat. Sometimes the BS you describe and the nagging you describe might not really be what that is. It might be how its perceived or interpreted as well. Some people see a woman trying to talk to them about things as nagging etc, because they don't want to deal with things themselves. Yes some women might nag, probably because they feel like they are not being heard. 

Bottom line it sounds like you want a woman who will sit down and shut up while you get your way.


----------



## *LittleDeer*

BjornFree said:


> I just modified the original post to edit out all the alpha beta references.
> 
> Yep, that is definitely wife material. Just add a humorous personality and I'd say that's pretty much the perfect wife. Now i'm not looking for perfection, I really don't mind the fact that my wife is quick to anger but she cools down just as fast. Most of those traits are definitely worthy of appreciation.
> 
> Makes me wonder if the women are really up in arms against the poster and not the post itself.


No it's the post.



> I mean a girl who will cook for you, clean the house, take care of the kids, and love you for who you are. A girl that doesn't try to control you, nag you, or tell you what to do. Someone that listens to what you have to say, lets you make most of the major decisions, and follows your lead.


If by control- he means a girl who has reasonable boundaries and expectations, wants you to put your marriage and family first and expects you to e a grown up-not out partying, taking care of things like an adult, caring for your own children etc
Many people use the controlling card, when they need to reevaluate their own behaviour.
I wonder what his wife would say about him?
Why do women "nag" or try and tell men what to do? From my own experience nagging comes when a woman asks a man to do something and he isn't being responsible for himself.
I don't "Nag" my fiance because there is no need. He's an adult and behaves like one. He doesn't act like a slob, spend hours playing video games, he cares for the children because that's what parents do! I could go on but you get the point. 

Oh and I am happy for my fiance to make the major decisions. Because he puts me and children first. he has proven himself to be trustworthy. I would not want a man child in charge of our relationship.



> Someone that won't get mad when you go out with your friends, but will stay home with the kids. A wife that doesn't try to argue with you over bs and just gets along with you. Someone that will respect you and won't cheat on you. Most importantly, a wife that gives you sex and doesn't deny it.


This post makes me think that this guys aim is to go out alone often and hang with his homies, rather then focus on his family. Any person doing that, man or woman needs a kick up the rear, 

Who is to say the arguments are BS? No one likes a dismissive partner. 

I also don't argue with my fiance, but he and I discuss issues. There are never any petty fights. However once again, he is not a child, and doesn't prefer to spend all his spare time cruising around, leaving me to care for the children.

Neither of us has cheated.

And I don't deny sex, because he's sexy and attractive to me. Sexy and attractive because of how he behaves and carries himself. 



> Yes that is the ideal. My advice to all young men who are looking for a potential wife, LOOK FOR THAT. I'd say it's even good if she works and makes decent money.


And the icing on the cake. Do all the house work, do all the child care and make decent money too. Every woman's dreams. 
Pfft


Definitely the post.


----------



## jaquen

RandomDude said:


> ... you have to be kidding me.
> Ok now I have to read his other thread
> EDIT: Errr, can't find his post =/
> 
> @stopandmakecoffee
> :rofl: Nice one





Adex said:


> BECOME THE ALPHA! Last night, I told my wife, "Give me a handjob" and she handled it without complaining. Then I complimented her telling her good job.
> 
> It's awesome. A few years ago, I was more beta and wouldn't have asked like that. Women love when the man takes the lead.


----------



## Dollystanford

OH it's 'give me a handjob' man 

hahaha I remember you


----------



## trey69

Dollystanford said:


> OH it's 'give me a handjob' man
> 
> hahaha I remember you


and he complimented her by telling her good job! :smthumbup:


----------



## Tall Average Guy

Adex said:


> Let's be honest. Isn't it much better to have a beta wife to be married to?
> 
> By this, I mean a girl who will cook for you, clean the house, take care of the kids, and love you for who you are. A girl that doesn't try to control you, nag you, or tell you what to do. Someone that listens to what you have to say, lets you make most of the major decisions, and follows your lead.
> 
> Someone that won't get mad when you go out with your friends, but will stay home with the kids. A wife that doesn't try to argue with you over bs and just gets along with you. Someone that will respect you and won't cheat on you. Most importantly, a wife that gives you sex and doesn't deny it.
> 
> Yes that is the ideal. My advice to all young men who are looking for a potential wife, LOOK FOR THAT. I'd say it's even good if she works and makes decent money. As long as her personality is beta.
> 
> My wife is a lot of that, but it would be nice if she was more beta.


Not at all. I want a partner, not a stepford wife. 

But if you need a "beta wife" to make you feel better about yourself, good luck to you.


----------



## jaquen

If there is a Mrs. Adex, I would murder to have her register and give her perspective on this marriage.


----------



## ScarletBegonias

is this a real thread? it can't be.


aww someone is playing a joke on the tam ladies trying to get our thongs in a bunch. 

come on guys,confess!


----------



## 3Xnocharm

Cosmos said:


> And on yet another thread he proudly told us that he told his wife to give him a BJ, then when she was done he told her "good job." Apparently this is how he thinks alphas make love...


UGH! I just threw up a little in my mouth...


----------



## Jane_Doe

I just had to pitch in on the terminology used here. I'm not offended by the 'alpha' and 'beta' terms being used (across the site, and across the internet in general), but I think there's an incorrect understanding of their meaning. As far as my own limited understanding goes, alpha-male and alpha-female in the animal kingdom are two different things, and they aren't even on the same ladder, so there's no possibility of one sex alpha knocking the opposite-sex alpha off the top of the ladder (something terrified human males say as their reason for not wanting an alpha female). 

Alpha males in the animal kingdom seek out and defend alpha females because they're the best to mate with. She has all the qualities that make her sexy to him, plus an increased odds of being successful in creating and raising his offspring. So when you're outlining your perfect female (however that might express itself in this modern society) you'd be naturally trying to describe an alpha female, not a beta.

Purposely going for a 'beta' female would be going for someone you see as less desirable, less qualified for the job, the second-best.

But then again, even chimp males spend the time grooming, courting and spoiling his favourite female, something the OP with his terror of being 'outranked' hasn't gotten the hang of just yet.


----------



## Amplexor

stritle said:


> I’m pretty sure what you want is a f*ckable robot.


Trenton, didn't we have this discussion before???? :rofl:


----------



## lovelygirl

Dollystanford said:


> OH it's 'give me a handjob' man
> 
> hahaha I remember you


omg. Is he the guy who *ordered* his wife to give him a hand job???


And I recall he ended his post thinking was the perfect alpha.


:lol:


Sucks to be his wife.


----------



## ScarletBegonias

something tells me the ways he treats his wife are made up in his own little alpha fantasy land and not at all an accurate picture of reality.
perhaps the little woman is the alpha...


----------



## SlowlyGettingWiser

Maybe he 'ordered' his wife, too.....via the MAIL...

Some cultures encourage Stepford-ism in their women as the cultural norm. At least you know what you're getting.



*


----------



## TiggyBlue

BjornFree said:


> I just modified the original post to edit out all the alpha beta references.
> 
> Yep, that is definitely wife material. Just add a humorous personality and I'd say that's pretty much the perfect wife. Now i'm not looking for perfection, I really don't mind the fact that my wife is quick to anger but she cools down just as fast. Most of those traits are definitely worthy of appreciation.
> 
> Makes me wonder if the women are really up in arms against the poster and not the post itself.


Wanting a women to clean, cook, care for the children while you do whatever you want, doesn't ever say anything to you (nag) and follows whatever decision you make sounds like a employee rather than a wife.
If a woman was doing all that and also working, what would be the incentive to stay with their partner?
they would doing everything with someone else trying to make the big decisions in their life, they're partner would just become a deadweight in the house.
Seems more amazement at his mindframe than up in arms with most of the posts on here atm.


----------



## DvlsAdvc8

Mavash. said:


> Let me get this straight. You want a happy accomplished homemaker, who loves sex, lets you go out with your friends while she stays home with the kids and you want her to make decent money too?
> 
> Good luck finding this cause she doesn't exist.
> 
> I'm as old fashioned as they come and even my husband doesn't get all this.


Oh they exist... I had almost exactly what he's looking for. Let me tell you, it was pretty boring. But honestly, I don't think "loves sex" comes in that package... they aren't passionate about about anything in their self-interest.

I married her because of how comfortable I was with her - we never fought, I did what I wanted, she took care of most of the housework, and she usually joined me in my adventures (I'm somewhat random and spontaneous); It was pretty awesome for the first few years. But no amount of personal comfort will keep you happy with someone who lacks any passion of their own.

After much agony and trying to figure out wtf is wrong, why you're not happy and why you can't awaken her passions or see any fire in her... you wake up one day and realize that there just isn't much life there... and its your own fault for having chosen her. On the bright side, you come to recognize why you chose someone like that in the first place, and can start to address your own issues.


----------



## Deejo

Amplexor said:


> Trenton, didn't we have this discussion before???? :rofl:


Wasn't that the Robo-Bobbit?


----------



## Catherine602

The responses are so funny. 

The post made me think of why so many men long for a girl like this. Not a cyborg so much a multidimential person who is predictable? 

Not bashing my gender but my female friends, relatives and associates are unpredictable. I understand why they do what they do after they do it but, the timing and amplitude surprise me. 

Men - I don't understand but, they are fairly predictable.


----------



## oldgeezer

I think we're all being played by some bored person, gender unknown, who has way too much time on their hands, and a fetish for trying to sucker good people into stupid games. 

At least it feels that way.


----------



## Amplexor

Deejo said:


> Wasn't that the Robo-Bobbit?


RoBobbit

Patent Pending.


----------



## Therealbrighteyes

Amplexor said:


> RoBobbit
> 
> Patent Pending.


Okay, side track. Do you remember the guy from Holland who didn't know what we were talking about and after Trenton explained, his only response was "God, that sounds painful". You think?!


----------



## Amplexor

Yup. We never got the product off and running. Ran out of volunteers for the Quality Assurance Process after one try.


----------



## Amplexor

lovelygirl said:


> omg. Is he the guy who *ordered* his wife to give him a hand job???
> 
> And I recall he ended his post thinking was the perfect alpha.
> 
> :lol:












This Alfa might help you get a hand job or two.


----------



## jaquen

Amplexor said:


> This Alfa might help you get a hand job or two.


Good job.


----------



## Therealbrighteyes

Amplexor said:


> This Alfa might help you get a hand job or two.


THAT'S an Alfa?!?! No way. The hell? Are we talking Alfa Romeo or is this some weird Amplexor humour?! :scratchhead:


----------



## Amplexor

I was a member of Beta Theta Pi in college. Dated a Gamma Phi Beta for a while. Never really developed. Neither of us would make decision on what to do, neither made the first move. Generally we just watched TV for a while in silence then went back to our respective rooms and masturbated thinking about somebody else.


----------



## Amplexor

Therealbrighteyes said:


> THAT'S an Alfa?!?! No way. The hell? Are we talking Alfa Romeo or is this some weird Amplexor humour?! :scratchhead:


Alfa Romeo 4c and Amp's humor is always weird.


----------



## Dollystanford

Surely it's the 8c babes
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Therealbrighteyes

Amplexor said:


> I was a member of Beta Theta Pi in college. Dated a Gamma Phi Beta for a while. Never really developed. Neither of us would make decision on what to do, neither made the first move. Generally we just watched TV for a while in silence then went back to our respective rooms and masturbated thinking about somebody else.


:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

There are about a thousand men here who could take a lesson from you, Deejo and Halien. No, I am not sucking up, I really mean it.


----------



## Gaia

All of you are very... "unique"
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Goldmember357

Don't like these narrow definitions of defining people or the sexes.


----------



## Therealbrighteyes

Amplexor said:


> Alfa Romeo 4c and Amp's humor is always weird.


Wow! I am a gear head but not nearly as much as my youngest. Can't wait until he gets home to ask him about this car. He knows about cars. ALL cars. He is currently at cello practice so that he can perform at Carnegie Hall with his high school orchestra group in 2014. What a dynamic he is. A guy who loves cars = Alpha. A guy who plays cello = Beta. Perhaps he is just a soon to be man who is awesome. Hmmmmmmmmm.


----------



## Adex

What's up people. I haven't seen this thread since yesterday and 4 pages later, more Adex bashing lol.

It's ok to disagree with my opinions, but I don't get the insults in my direction.


----------



## Adex

In my defense, everything I said I believe, and everything I said is true with regards to my life. My ideas on alpha may seem archaic, but from my research and my practical experience, it's what I know to work in my life.


----------



## Gaia

Well good for you but perhaps you should have labeled the thread.... "The beta wife is the perfect wife for me" Clearly not everyone finds your idea of perfection very appealing.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Adex

Trenton said:


> Sure you can self define words. You can even create a Code of Adex and whatnot but that doesn't mean you understand the words or the concepts.


My vocabulary and knowledge are extensive enough to understand the rudimentary basics of human nature.


----------



## RandomDude

Adex I find your HJ comment rather amusing. Odd as well.

Unless you WERE roleplaying dom and sub (you were right? like come on!), what you pulled by ordering a HJ would have turned off any self-respecting woman and hell even a nympho would be turned off - and yes I know, because I'm married to a freakin nympho!!!

The implications for your behaviour are troubling especially when I think about it -> What it would take to reduce a woman to that point where she has no spirit left until she's a willing robot... it sure doesn't look good mate. So explain to us what's really going on because currently you're coming across as an abusive husband.


----------



## Adex

BjornFree said:


> I just modified the original post to edit out all the alpha beta references.
> 
> Yep, that is definitely wife material. Just add a humorous personality and I'd say that's pretty much the perfect wife. Now i'm not looking for perfection, I really don't mind the fact that my wife is quick to anger but she cools down just as fast. Most of those traits are definitely worthy of appreciation.
> 
> Makes me wonder if the women are really up in arms against the poster and not the post itself.


Exactly. We don't have to use the terms alpha or beta. Indeed, for a man, life would be good married to a wife with most of those characteristics.


----------



## Cosmos

Adex said:


> My vocabulary and knowledge are extensive enough to understand the rudimentary basics of human nature.


But that's the problem, Adex, you don't appear to understand the basics of human nature. If you did you would realize that humans are very complex creatures, and one size doesn't fit all.

You can adopt all sorts of new behaviours, but if they are only designed to benefit you, your relationship won't be a healthy one.


----------



## Adex

RandomDude said:


> Adex I find your HJ comment rather amusing. Odd as well.
> 
> Unless you WERE roleplaying dom and sub (you were right? like come on!), what you pulled by ordering a HJ would have turned off any self-respecting woman and hell even a nympho would be turned off - and yes I know, because I'm married to a freakin nympho!!!
> 
> The implications for your behaviour are troubling especially when I think about it -> What it would take to reduce a woman to that point where she has no spirit left until she's a willing robot... it sure doesn't look good mate. So explain to us what's really going on because currently you're coming across as an abusive husband.


I'm definitely not an abusive husband. In fact my wife is an independent, strong person. In some ways, I wish she had more beta qualities.


----------



## yellowledbet

Adex said:


> My vocabulary and knowledge are extensive enough to understand the rudimentary basics of human nature.


Do tell


----------



## Lyris

Dollystanford said:


> what if you're a bit dumb and make really stupid decisions that have implications for your family. I mean what if what you have to say isn't really that great?


Because just liking it isn't enough.

Dolly, I love you.


----------



## krismimo

Sounds like a new episode from Snapped to me better get the popcorn ready...


----------



## krismimo

Ok being devils advocate here. You did write this in the Mens club house section of the LTAM site. I think your seeking camaraderie amongst the other men here. Perhaps looking to see if others think the same way as you or if you share the same opinion. I wonder you mentioned what you would like in a partner so I would like to ask you this what do you bring to the table in return?


----------



## YinPrincess

Well... That was an interesting way to spend an hour...
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Stonewall

No I am too beta myself and I need her to be what she is (more alpha) that keeps the relationship in balance.


----------



## NewM

EleGirl said:


> So you want her work a full time job, clean the house, and take care of the children while you party. You don't want to help with any housework, child care, etc because you think that makes you beta.
> 
> Insulting to women.


If there is woman like that I wonder why would she need him then 

More like ALPHA woman.


----------



## WyshIknew

Adex said:


> What's up people. I haven't seen this thread since yesterday and 4 pages later, more Adex bashing lol.
> 
> It's ok to disagree with my opinions, but I don't get the insults in my direction.


Well some of the posts are mildly insulting I suppose but I see most of them as people just shaking their heads in disbelief.

And you have been fairly insulting yourself to anyone you deem as beta. Telling them "You can take that beta talk to the ladies lounge" or similar.

You seem to have taken a book (I presume MMSLP) that is primarily aimed at men with troubled marriages, or who have suffered or who are suffering at the hands of an adulteress and turned it into your manifesto for life.

I have read MMSLP and enjoyed it, found some parts that resonated with me and used some of the advice from the book.
I rather let the 'alpha' side of things down because after reading the book I decided to do some more 'beta' things.

Where the book scores for me is that it 'dresses' things up.
Nobody really likes being told that the reason your wife is having an affair is because primarily she is broken inside, but the fact that you are or might be fat, lazy, smelly, slobby, scruffy and on the PC all night and leaving her to do all the work around the house did not help as she has lost attraction to you.
If it can be set out as a male action plan, rationalisation hamster etc with a guide to winning your wife back more men will take notice.

As a man I would rather be told to read MMSLP than be told that the reason my wife had an affair is that you are fat, lazy and sit around farting all day.

If trying to be more 'alpha' is working for you then great, just don't expect everyone to agree with you.

I think one of your earlier posts stated that you were not entirely happy with the amount of sex you were having and that being more 'alpha' turned this around.
What do you say to someone like SA's hubby or myself? I certainly don't regard myself as 'alpha' although my wife disagrees, and I can literally make love to my wife whenever I want. And SA regards her hubby as beta and it sounds like he gets so much that SA is wearing the poor chap out.

Gotta go, need to do some laundry, tidy the kitchen and cook a meal. Oh the trials of a beta man!


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## Caribbean Man

Jane_Doe said:


> As far as my own limited understanding goes, alpha-male and alpha-female in the animal kingdom are two different things, and they aren't even on the same ladder, so there's no possibility of one sex alpha knocking the opposite-sex alpha off the top of the ladder (something terrified human males say as their reason for not wanting an alpha female).
> 
> *Alpha males in the animal kingdom seek out and defend alpha females because they're the best to mate with. She has all the qualities that make her sexy to him, plus an increased odds of being successful in creating and raising his offspring.* So when you're outlining your perfect female (however that might express itself in this modern society) you'd be naturally trying to describe an alpha female, not a beta.
> 
> .


:iagree:

FINALLY!

Someone who knows it.
Looks like the research you did for that degree is still fresh in your memory...:smthumbup:


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## Rowan

I will be completely honest here and say that the perfect Beta wife Adex describes is _exactly_ what my husband wanted. Actually, what he felt _entitled_ to. He's a manly, dominant, confident MAN and he deserves to have a woman who takes care of him! 

Of course, he never said that out loud. He knew it would sound bad. But it's what he wanted, fully expected me to automatically be (despite all evidence to the contrary, pre-marriage), and was angry for much of our marriage about not getting. 

And why not? Wouldn't most people, in their heart of hearts, love having someone to serve them and meet all their needs, without having to put forth any effort at reciprocity? I mean, getting everything for nothing is kinda the ultimate dream - like winning the lottery or inheriting millions from a heretofore unknown relative. 

Eventually, my husband's abject disappointment with his frequently malfunctioning Homemaker-CEO-Nanny-Hostess Barbie (Special Deaf-Mute Linda Lovelace Edition) led him to begin having affairs. Which were of course my fault because I wasn't meeting his needs! 

See, he's not actually an Alpha. But it does start with "A".


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## Mavash.

Rowan said:


> Eventually, my husband's abject disappointment with his frequently malfunctioning Homemaker-CEO-Nanny-Hostess Barbie (Special Deaf-Mute Linda Lovelace Edition) led him to begin having affairs. Which were of course my fault because I wasn't meeting his needs!
> 
> See, he's not actually an Alpha. But it does start with "A".


:lol:


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## Hicks

I'm not just a Beta... I'm a Master Beta


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## DvlsAdvc8

I initially found this alpha/beta stuff interesting and went about linking my traits to one or the other, usually determining that in some cases I'm alpha... in others I'm beta. The more I've read however, the more my eyes now glaze over and I think... I don't really give a rats behind. I do what I want and I don't really care whether someone thinks I'm being dominant or submissive because its all relative to the other members of the social group.

In some groups, I'm clearly dominant. In others, someone else will be. In most, it will be unclear and shifting.

We always relate this subject to the animal kingdom, but where in the animal kingdom do you observe these traits and see monogamous males who are helpful to their mates beyond defense? The more clear the hierachy in the animal kingdom is, the less you see monogamous behavior.

The perfect human male or female partner, isn't all dominant or submissive in all situations.


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## TiggyBlue

Jane_Doe said:


> I just had to pitch in on the terminology used here. I'm not offended by the 'alpha' and 'beta' terms being used (across the site, and across the internet in general), but I think there's an incorrect understanding of their meaning. As far as my own limited understanding goes, alpha-male and alpha-female in the animal kingdom are two different things, and they aren't even on the same ladder, so there's no possibility of one sex alpha knocking the opposite-sex alpha off the top of the ladder (something terrified human males say as their reason for not wanting an alpha female).
> 
> Alpha males in the animal kingdom seek out and defend alpha females because they're the best to mate with. She has all the qualities that make her sexy to him, plus an increased odds of being successful in creating and raising his offspring. So when you're outlining your perfect female (however that might express itself in this modern society) you'd be naturally trying to describe an alpha female, not a beta.
> 
> Purposely going for a 'beta' female would be going for someone you see as less desirable, less qualified for the job, the second-best.
> 
> But then again, even chimp males spend the time grooming, courting and spoiling his favourite female, something the OP with his terror of being 'outranked' hasn't gotten the hang of just yet.


A lot of what you said if true, but a alpha female in the animal kingdom (especially in wolf packs) are leaders of the pack a lot of the time (abilities matter more than gender), they are not follower's and raising of pups comes down to the whole pack not just her (she still hunts). So if 'alpha' translated the same in human terms their is a good chance she would make a lot (if not most) and would bring in the bacon while others looked after her kids a lot of the time. But alpha's attract alpha's because it makes for better breeding and they are an alpha pair that works together, not in competition for power with each other.


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## TiggyBlue

DvlsAdvc8 said:


> We always relate this subject to the animal kingdom, but where in the animal kingdom do you observe these traits and see monogamous males who are helpful to their mates beyond defense?


There's very few species that either gender is monogamous.


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## I'mInLoveWithMyHubby

Both my husband and I are very similar in personalities. We are two peas in a pod. We don't tell each other what to do and we both know what we need to get done. Neither of us nag. However, I do have my PMS moments and I never allow anyone to walk all over me. When I'm pms'ing I need to be left alone. It's nice living with my husband. We are almost always happy and live very peacefully minus cranky kids once in a great while.

My husband and I work as a team 100%. We make all decisions together and fully support each others hobbies, dreams and interests. I wouldn't want it any other way. Neither of us are doormats, but we are both very laid back and really enjoy life as best as we can.


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## Caribbean Man

DvlsAdvc8 said:


> *We always relate this subject to the animal kingdom, but where in the animal kingdom do you observe these traits and see monogamous males who are helpful to their mates beyond defense? The more clear the hierachy in the animal kingdom is, the less you see monogamous behavior.*
> 
> *The perfect human male or female partner, isn't all dominant or submissive in all situations.*


And therin lies the difference.
Human beings can adapt to perform at a higher degree.

Take a horse for example. A horse can be trained , desensitization, conditioning etc to perform in a military parade, with cheering crowds, drummers and marching soldiers. Horses have a natural fear of unpredictable movements. 
But with special training it overcomes that fear.

Human beings can adapt and change.
As a matter of fact they can even do so, selectively. 
Soldiers who belong to special units like SEAL teams etc. undergo special physical and psychological training to desensitize them and change their natural response to certain types of situations.
So where a civilian would react with fear and flight, they would react with aggression and engage.


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## krismimo

You dont have to agree with the man but you don't have to insult him either....


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## LearninAsWeGo

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/1342418-post3.html

You have to _give _control to _get _it. It's a chess game.

Assuming you don't beat/rape your wife or she wasn't severely neglected/abused, she will have self esteem. And if you do those things or get that kind of 'rehab' wife, enjoy a bonafide psycho as your life companion (not too good unless you're a retired psychiatrist who loved his past job). Studies repeatedly show that the more liberated women are, the better the sex drive will be (less embarrasment, stigma, etc).

If you open the pasture gate for a beautiful and wild female stallion but have food, water, and a huge horse c0ck in the pasture, why would she ever want to leave? Be an amazing partner, and use soft control and charm (timing is critical), seldom hard control.

To the OP, if you want to be all alpha male and she all beta, find a mail order bride... and she will kill you in your sleep for the life insurance money or divorce you and take the house or a good chunk of $$$ as soon as she finishes schooling... literally. Have fun with that.

Read Athol Kay's book, man.


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## sinnister

My wife has some (admitedly though very little) of the beta qualities you've described. It's nice I admit. But I love the other side of her too. And there is no way in hell I would have chosen her to be the mother of my children if she were completley beta.

I wanted a lioness to protect my cubs. That's what I got.


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## lilith23

Sometimes, I think that having someone to nag us or disagree with us is a kind of fortunate thing to have. For example, I prefer to have a partner who goes against my will of eating something unhealthy instead of letting me do anything. It's a fortunate thing for me to find someone who I can consider him partner and not slave, and that bothers enough to go against me for my sake.


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## bfree

Just like a man a woman should have both alpha and beta qualities. Its all about balance.


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## Adex

Trenton said:


> I wish all the Alpha Beta folks would go back to college where they belong, join sororities/fraternities and get drunk under pressure but in their off time pretend that the terms they keep flicking off of their tongues are rudimentary to the poetry of their lives when really they're just meaningless visits into the psych they refuse to look into or understand.
> 
> Adex this is my very verbose way of telling you to get a Clue (not one from the game but rather one from life).


I have things pretty much figured out.

If a man married a truly beta wife, his life would be pretty easy, relaxed, and he could do what he wanted. It's his job to not take advantage of that by not abusing or cheating on his wife.


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## alte Dame

I just found this hilarious claim by Adex.

Even June Cleaver has more personality and vitality than Adex's dreamgirl.

Seriously, I don't believe a man of any real intellect is truly interested in that sort of wife. (Except, of course, the part about 'most importantly, never denies sex...')


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## Adex

alte Dame said:


> I just found this hilarious claim by Adex.
> 
> Even June Cleaver has more personality and vitality than Adex's dreamgirl.
> 
> Seriously, I don't believe a man of any real intellect is truly interested in that sort of wife. (Except, of course, the part about 'most importantly, never denies sex...')


Really? A man doesn't want a wife who cooks, cleans the house, takes care of the kids, and doesn't get mad when he goes out with his friends? What are you smoking.


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## alte Dame

Adex said:


> Really? A man doesn't want a wife who cooks, cleans the house, takes care of the kids, and doesn't get mad when he goes out with his friends? What are you smoking.


Definitely not what you are.


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## Adex

There's nothing selfish about having a wife that does all that. I'm not talking about what a husband should be for a wife, I'm purely talking about how the perfect wife should be. Again, most of the ones that disagree with this are women. It's to be expected.


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## Fisherman

Adex said:


> There's nothing selfish about having a wife that does all that. I'm not talking about what a husband should be for a wife, I'm purely talking about how the perfect wife should be. Again, most of the ones that disagree with this are women. It's to be expected.


At least your perfect wife, not mine.


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## alte Dame

To respond seriously, I can say that I've seen quite often that this type of marriage founders as time goes on if the husband is smart, professional and successful. I know many couples that started out with the W essentially offering what Adex wants.

By the time the children were in HS, the husband was bothered by the intellectual mismatch that only grew as his career soared and her housewife duties stayed the same. In all of these cases, the H sued for divorce, leaving a bewildered W in his wake. She thought she was giving him everything he wanted, but it turned out that what he wanted had changed as he changed. He now wanted a smart, dynamic, professional W.

One successful attorney I know left his W for a district attorney divorcee who was much better educated and much more successful professionally than his W. He told me that he couldn't stand to talk to his W anymore. He said she almost sounded stupid to him and he felt terrible and guilty about his feelings.


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## Adex

alte Dame said:


> To respond seriously, I can say that I've seen quite often that this type of marriage founders as time goes on if the husband is smart, professional and successful. I know many couples that started out with the W essentially offering what Adex wants.
> 
> By the time the children were in HS, the husband was bothered by the intellectual mismatch that only grew as his career soared and her housewife duties stayed the same. In all of these cases, the H sued for divorce, leaving a bewildered W in his wake. She thought she was giving him everything he wanted, but it turned out that what he wanted had changed as he changed. He now wanted a smart, dynamic, professional W.
> 
> One successful attorney I know left his W for a district attorney divorcee who was much better educated and much more successful professionally than his W. He told me that he couldn't stand to talk to his W anymore. He said she almost sounded stupid to him and he felt terrible and guilty about his feelings.


Actually, the perfect beta wife could also be intellegent. It's a plus if she had a good job and made good money. I used the word perfect because that's exactly what it is. It's the best of everything. In real life, I know it would be hard to find a woman that emcompasses all that.

I'd also add physically, taller than 5'6" and less than 115lbs because I like skinny women. My wife has the physical looks and enough beta qualities to keep me content, but she is not perfect as I describe it.


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## Fisherman

Adex said:


> Actually, the perfect beta wife could also be intellegent. It's a plus if she had a good job and made good money. I used the word perfect because that's exactly what it is. It's the best of everything. In real life, I know it would be hard to find a woman that emcompasses all that.


No, in order for her to be intellectually challenging she would have to be alpha.


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## alte Dame

Adex said:


> Actually, the perfect beta wife could also be intellegent. It's a plus if she had a good job and made good money. I used the word perfect because that's exactly what it is. It's the best of everything. In real life, I know it would be hard to find a woman that emcompasses all that.


And what I'm saying is that it's my experience that what intelligent men want changes as they mature. As children grow older & the dynamic between husband and wife adapts to that new reality, both men and women often want different things.

As I said, it's the mismatch in intellectual development that seems to be the killer here, and native intelligence isn't the same thing as intellect.


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## Adex

Jkw4338 said:


> No, in order for her to be intellectually challenging she would have to be alpha.


I disagree. There are plenty of intelligent women who want their man to lead and are beta to his alpha.


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## TiggyBlue

Adex said:


> Actually, the perfect beta wife could also be intellegent. It's a plus if she had a good job and made good money. I used the word perfect because that's exactly what it is. It's the best of everything. In real life, I know it would be hard to find a woman that emcompasses all that.
> 
> I'd also add physically, taller than 5'6" and less than 115lbs because I like skinny women. My wife has the physical looks and enough beta qualities to keep me content, but she is not perfect as I describe it.


But if she cleans, cooks, looks after the children and has a good job what would be her incentive to have a husband that doesn't clean, cook or look after the kids?
Would be more of a burden in her life than a asset, the husband would become very disposable.


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## Fisherman

Adex said:


> I disagree. There are plenty of intelligent women who want their man to lead and are beta to his alpha.


In the scenario that alte is describing the husband was looking for an intellectually challenging spouse, that is not beta.


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## alte Dame

Adex said:


> I'd also add physically, taller than 5'6" and less than 115lbs because I like skinny women.


You gotta love this .


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## SlowlyGettingWiser

In all seriousness, IF a woman was this perfect beta woman that you describe, WHY would she need/want to be married? What would the man bring to the marriage?

As abitlost pointed out:


she doesn't need his income (she makes good money, has a good job)
she takes care of house, kids, cooking (if she lived in a condo, she wouldn't even need him to do outside jobs)
She has a good home, good income, kids, clean clothes, clean house, good food. She can get sex from any guy she meets so WHAT would be the impetus for her to get married? Or stay married? Heck, if she DIVORCES, she can get child support (extra income)

As Dubya would say, 'Wouldn't be prudent.'


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## alte Dame

abitlost said:


> But if she cleans, cooks, looks after the children and has a good job what would be her incentive to have a husband that doesn't clean, cook or look after the kids?
> Would be more of a burden in her life than a asset, the husband would become very disposable.


Very true.


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## Fisherman

This is a silly thread IMO. People have different ideas of perfection, there is no recipe.


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## alte Dame

Jkw4338 said:


> People have different ideas of perfection, there is no recipe.


Yes. In my case, my H and I have been together for 35 years. We are both educated and professional. We have two children, also both educated and professional.

My H and I both shop, cook, clean, and worry about our home and family. And, I might add, I have never denied him sex.

(I am shorter than 5' 6", but I am slim.)


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## mhg

****** it, mate, you've convinced me!!!!

No more Mr Nice Guy. No more of this handing over my pay to the wife business, no more helping her do the grocery shopping, no more help around the house when she's exhausted from being outside attending to the numerous needs of her spoilt breeding cows.

Having my meals cooked for me just isn't going to be enough any more. I want my FAVOURITE meals cooked every day without fail, and god help her if it's not ready when I get home.
None of this kissy cuddly stuff when she greets me at the door every day, I want SEX. NOW!!!!

From now on, I'm going to slam my fist on the kitchen table, beat my hairy chest, and DEMAND my rights.
No more of this being loving and affectionate, it's not like she's special or anything.

Sex won't just be a meagre two or three times in 24 hrs, it will be when I say and how I say, or else.
And heaven help her if she dares to argue with me, her master.

So wife, look out!!!!






And after all this, when I haul my broken butt out of 6 months worth of traction, I'll let you all know how this plan worked for me.....


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## DvlsAdvc8

Personally, I love short women who are a pain in the ass and call me out on my ****.


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## Kasler

I don't date now, but I tended to avoid most independent types. They seemed to be magnets for drama and to be honest thought way too much of themselves for being completely independent, and it felt like they're just waiting for me to ask them how and why on dates. 

I have no problems with an assertive woman but think many cross the line and end up conceited and full of themselves. 

Those kind of women are the equivalent of the losers who walk around thinking they're the resident Mac daddy just because they got a little bit of play from a chick or two.


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## Dreald

Kasler said:


> I don't date now, but I tended to avoid most independent types. They seemed to be magnets for drama and to be honest thought way too much of themselves for being completely independent, and it felt like they're just waiting for me to ask them how and why on dates.
> 
> I have no problems with an assertive woman but think many cross the line and end up conceited and full of themselves.
> 
> Those kind of women are the equivalent of the losers who walk around thinking they're the resident Mac daddy just because they got a little bit of play from a chick or two.


Spot on. A guy needs to make sure that his 'independent' girlfriend is actually not that conceited, "my **** don't stink" BEFORE you marry.

Ask me how I know....


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## SlowlyGettingWiser

So, Dreald, how DO you know?...

...perhaps your W (STBXW?) is afflicted with 'my azz is made of gold and my sh1t don't stink' - itis?


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