# I love giving oral, she considers it more of a tease



## bobsmith (Oct 15, 2012)

Maybe a shocker?? Our sex life is mostly very good. She has zero problem performing oral on me but admits that me giving her oral is more of a tease and mostly looking for the the rod. 

Her fun zone is ultra nice and I like being in there! I have not directly asked (not scared really) but I suspect she has not had an orgasm from oral. 

Wondering how we might overcome this hurdle? Guess I figured most women would really appreciate some good licking. Is there something I can try or do different? I have always been told I am very good at it.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

Being good with other people doesn't mean you're doing it right for your current partner. There's some books that you can try, as a starting point. 

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## bobsmith (Oct 15, 2012)

um, I actually have a book and read it called "she cums first". 

I guess I consider it important that I know her well enough to know how to give her the big O in other ways.


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## Redheadguy (Jul 30, 2014)

Do you do any inside work while also on the outside ?


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

Well, there's been threads in here in the past... Not all women like receiving oral. Maybe you found one. Maybe you just haven't found her triggers yet. No way for us to tell. 

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## bobsmith (Oct 15, 2012)

OH yeah! I put my tongue in as far as I can, suck her, fingers in, etc. With my ex, she liked the G spot area rubbed with 2 fingers while I sucked. She is also Bi thus maybe why she really likes oral! It takes a while and I am usually willing to put in the time. 

I think my motivation is if I can get her the big O orally, I can get some nice oral which I might prefer over sex many times.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

Why haven't you asked her if she's orgasmed through oral? Either with you or with other partners?

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## murphy5 (May 1, 2014)

a lot of women do NOT like cunnilingus. Some do not enjoy it, some think it is too sensitive for that, some think men could not possibly like the taste, some think it is gross and dirty.

So, if she is letting you do it at all...you are way ahead of the curve. Just smile and do it when she lets you.

IF she has never orgasmed from it, try a small vibrator inserted, and you licking her clit at the same time. The combo should do the trick.


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## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

bobsmith said:


> OH yeah! I put my tongue in as far as I can, suck her, fingers in, etc. *With my ex*, she liked the G spot area rubbed with 2 fingers while I sucked. She is also Bi thus maybe why she really likes oral! It takes a while and I am usually willing to put in the time.
> 
> I think my motivation is if I can get her the big O orally, I can get some nice oral which I might prefer over sex many times.


This ultimately is at the root of just about everything you have ever posted here bob...


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## bobsmith (Oct 15, 2012)

No, I am purely speaking from my past experiences. 

I did just contact my GF to ask her about this. No issue asking in person but we typically banter a bit while at work. Probably something I will just have to discuss with her but we did talk before and she said she is open to trying to "get there" orally. Might take some effort and good communication.


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## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good evening all
Women vary (as do men). My wife enjoys oral as a "warm up", but doesn't want to orgasm that way, she prefers other things to finish.

That's absolutely fine with me.


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## bobsmith (Oct 15, 2012)

She does not seem to have an issue with unrecip oral but I feel guilty!!! She gets VERY turned on and then I feel like I need to give her "something". I don't want to be selfish as that will not gain me any points.


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## Redheadguy (Jul 30, 2014)

bobsmith said:


> Probably something I will just have to discuss with her but we did talk before and she said she is open to trying to "get there" orally. Might take some effort and good communication.


Communication will lead you to your answers. Before play to set up the intended destination, and during play so she can guide you to it.


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## doobie (Apr 15, 2014)

Maybe if you try varying the pressure it would help (not sure if you already do that). I've always loved oral with previous partners and usually found it much easier to come that way than PIV. However, my husband does everything so hard when he gives me oral (can't believe I'm using the present tense here as I haven't had a look in from my husband for several weeks  ) that it just hurts and makes me much less likely to come. I find the amount of pressure is crucial between something feeling sublime and something feeling painful.


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## bobsmith (Oct 15, 2012)

I guess I am looking at this from my perspective. If I was asked to give oral< would want "something" in return to get me taken care of. Is this a different mind set for women? 

My GF seems to be very interested in making ME happy which is sort of new to me. I like it but I guess my instinct is to recip somehow but if she does not really want oral, I might be out of the game for a bit! 

I did ask her and she admits that getting an O from oral is very hard for her but wants to try some things and "has faith I can do it".


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## OhGeesh (Jan 5, 2010)

All women are different. It's hard to believe, but is a fact. My lovely wife CANNOT orgasm through oral. She needs very hard direct clitoral stimulation. While she says it feels good she isn't getting there, same goes for any type of sex feels great, but a O isn't happening, a good Clitoral vibrator or Fingers work best. Sometimes I think it's going to get rubbed off, but that's just the way she is.

I've known girl who could O from oral.............best of luck!! Have fun


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## 3Xnocharm (Jun 22, 2012)

bobsmith said:


> Maybe a shocker?? Our sex life is mostly very good. She has zero problem performing oral on me but admits that me giving her oral is more of a tease and mostly looking for the the rod.
> 
> Her fun zone is ultra nice and I like being in there! I have not directly asked (not scared really) but I suspect she has not had an orgasm from oral.
> 
> Wondering how we might overcome this hurdle? Guess I figured most women would really appreciate some good licking. Is there something I can try or do different? I have always been told I am very good at it.


This is clearly YOUR issue, not hers. This is NOT a "hurdle". I am the same as your gf, oral on me is just a means to the ultimate end. While I do enjoy it, I can take it or leave it. Its pretty difficult to get me off with oral, and I really dont care either way. 

Lighten up and do what she enjoys.


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## hartvalve (Mar 15, 2014)

Oral sex is overrated with some women and others don't wish to live without it. I am one of the two. The former.

Oral was always a prelude (a tease) for me. Skipping the act never lessened the following orgasms gained other ways. I bet your wife never experienced an orgasm through oral sex too. At least your head is not in the sand about the possibility of her never having one that way. . Yaaay for you. I suggest you not touch her lower body while the vibrator is in use- It *can *be distracting. Instead- Concentrate on her nipples simultaneously while she 'vibrates'- On another thread someone mentioned nippling is like heaven to them-- I would agree.  Your problem is not really one if you don't allow it to become one in your mind.


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## Buddy400 (Aug 30, 2014)

Just to show that everybody is different, my wife does not like any fingers in anything while getting oral. And she LOVES oral.


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## hartvalve (Mar 15, 2014)

I am with your wife in a sense. I do not like fingers in anything period. On the clitoris, but never in the vagina. No fingers in the anal either.


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## bobsmith (Oct 15, 2012)

I think some of the issue here is she indicates "it all feels good". Yeah, I like my back scratched too but I am not going to pop doing that. 

The other night I made her cum 2x will fingering her G and sucking her clit. She admitted that she was not sure exactly what I was doing but it felt good. However, I am not sure if we will be able to achieve the same level of O as PIV. 

My ex, as some know is bi and admitted some time ago that her GF would work her orally for hours and mostly one big O!! Guess she just prefers that and maybe why I got used to performing the act to success.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

bobsmith said:


> Maybe a shocker?? Our sex life is mostly very good. She has zero problem performing oral on me but admits that me giving her oral is more of a tease and mostly looking for the the rod.
> 
> Her fun zone is ultra nice and I like being in there! I have not directly asked (not scared really) but I suspect she has not had an orgasm from oral.
> 
> Wondering how we might overcome this hurdle? Guess I figured most women would really appreciate some good licking. Is there something I can try or do different? I have always been told I am very good at it.


I am one of those women who can hardly get off by oral ...yet my Husband LOVES it... (I have nothing to compare in skills but I assume he is good)... .it's one of his favorite things to do.. 

To be honest, I even enjoy his hands more on me over his mouth.. only orgasmed twice in 25 yrs through oral.. but THE ROD... every time.. that's what does it for me. So yeah... some women are like this.. I still enjoy it but the fireworks just don't happen that way for me.


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## Melvynman (Mar 19, 2014)

Women have two types of "basic" orgasms. Stimulating the clitoris or the G-spot. The clitoris is highly sensitive to touch and the orgasms is quick fun low grade orgasms compared the the G-spot. The G-spot can be a mind blowing whole body shaking orgasms. Getting them both in-sync and you have master the game! Clitoris nerve endings run up and through the stomach area. The G-Spot nerves run up the spinal cord. You can give a body massage to awaken the nerves. Try this! When going down on your wife rub her belly, avoid the clitoris, put a finger inside and waking up the G-spot making it swell. To make the G-spot swell; start outside using one finger and in a circular motion go lightly all around the vagina. Slowly working the finger in but avoiding the G-spot. Brush by it every now and then to see if its swelling. All this time your still giving oral avoiding the clitoris and rubbing her belly. It going to take about twenty minutes. You might even have her watch porn. She going to want your shaft at some point witch is good. When that happens you can take brake if you want or not. If she wants you inside and you have checked and the G-spot its all swelled up. Its time. Take the hand that was rubbing move it towards vagina using the palm to put pressure above the pelvic bone. If your hand is big enough you can take your fingers around the vagina using apposing thumb push and pull the clitoris up "cup it like a mug." At the same time or just before put two fingers inside palm up. Its going to get a little physical be prepared! You might have use your elbow to keep her upper body in check and lie on top on one of her legs. This has to be done at minimum of twenty minutes after you have started. It takes twenty minutes to get the blood flowing in all the right places. Palm(arm) pressure on the lower tummy pushing the G-spot down, two fingers rubbing the G-spot and your mouth making love to the clitoris. Now hold on for the ride! 

Its going to take some practice.


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