# 7 days of sex challenge



## frustr8dhubby (Dec 23, 2010)

Hi folks,

I think I may have seen this mentioned on here before but I forget. To my great surprise my wife looked this up last night and is willing to try this to see if it may help kick-start her libido a little.

Have any of you tried it? Any thoughts?

(BTW, for those of you that know my story, I cannot tell you how elated I am that she is actually engaging in trying to meet me in the middle...)


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## Trickster (Nov 19, 2011)

I would like to give it a shot. I hope that with lots and lots of sex, we will find love again. I would be happy with just sex and lust. 7 days in a row? I would like that!


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## Enchantment (May 11, 2011)

I have heard of it, and it seems like a really worthwhile thing to try.

I do know that if my H and I are having a 'down' period for whatever reason, if we increase our sexual intimacy it actually helps us ... we become closer and are more likely to actually talk with each other more and get things resolved between us.

Sounds like a positive change ... let your wife know that you are encouraged, enthusiastic, and willing to engage. 

Keep us updated on how it goes ... it might be encouragement for others to think about trying it.


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## frustr8dhubby (Dec 23, 2010)

Enchantment,

Yes, I let her know how much I appreciate that she is taking some initiative on working with me on this. That is the main thing I have been asking for. Even if we don't find a good middle ground it means a lot that she is trying rather than giving me lip service.

Now let's hope she actually goes through with it.  We have to wait a bit to try it because she has her monthly visitor soon and it would interrupt the 7 days... I will keep you posted.


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## hldnhope (Apr 10, 2012)

frustr8dhubby said:


> Enchantment,
> 
> Yes, I let her know how much I appreciate that she is taking some initiative on working with me on this. That is the main thing I have been asking for. Even if we don't find a good middle ground it means a lot that she is trying rather than giving me lip service.
> 
> Now let's hope she actually goes through with it.  We have to wait a bit to try it because she has her monthly visitor soon and it would interrupt the 7 days... I will keep you posted.



GL and keep us posted...
Myself: I'd be happy with 7 day of sex in 1 year right now...


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## romantic_guy (Nov 8, 2011)

We are reading the book "The Sexperiment" now. We are planning to do this. We will have seven days of sex when we go to Florida in June but the point is doing if in the midst of life not on vacation. So we will either do it before our trip or when we get home.


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## viggling (Apr 27, 2012)

this sounds very interesting ... i think i am going to read more into it might be just what we need


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## Almostrecovered (Jul 14, 2011)

I think we ended up doing a 27 days of sex during our hysterical bonding (before she finally had her period)


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## anotherguy (Dec 14, 2011)

Sounds awful. 

People like this give me the screaming heebie-jeebies. I mean - are you kidding me? 
Pastor Advocates Week Of Sex - YouTube

http://defendingcontending.com/2010/02/14/how-do-you-hide-an-8-million-dollar-private-jet/

If you want to spend some quality time with each other - by all means...do so - and enjoy it.

Personally - I would run, screaming... like my hair was on fire.. from anything suggested by, or even even tangentially related to, sex 'advice' from this 'church'. If you need (or rather, seek) this kind of inspiration from these kinds of groups - then I suppose all I can say - in all sincerity - is ... good luck. Hope it works out. My instinct says you are better off figuring it out on your own - wthout taking guidance from charlatans like this.


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## frustr8dhubby (Dec 23, 2010)

We aren't doing it based on the pastor she is just looking for ideas to get herself back into the groove and I am ecstatic...


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## ilovechocolate (Jan 16, 2012)

Hi,
Just wondering if you would be able to post a link for this?


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## LovesHerMan (Jul 28, 2011)

Sounds great to me. Any action to shake things up and change the dynamic is a positive step. Do what you've always done and nothing changes. Let us know how things go.


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## MEM2020 (Aug 23, 2009)

F8,
This is an excellent sign. In an odd way, you and I are fellow travellers. So please take this purely in the spirit of what has worked for me. 

I would not say a word to her about this until the day that you kick it off. Not one word. Nor would I act differently towards her. So far this is just talk. The more you act like a kid in a candy store, the more you come across as a charity case. She SHOULD be doing this. So your affect needs to be "I am glad you are prioritizing our marriage at the high level it needs". Your affect cannot be "thank you thank you thank you". 


My W's body does not always cooperate with her mind. So for us, good sex is:
- Me making an effort to make her feel as good as she is capable of feeling. Sometimes that results in an "O", often not. 
- Me accepting that I can and should feel good about spending time with each other, where we are both totally focused on making each other feel special and loved.
- If she doesn't "get there", and has made it clear she can't on that given night, I just smile and say "I hope this felt good to you". Because if I seemed disappointed she feels like a bad lover, which is not exactly reinforcing her desire for more sex. 
- Me not pressing her to do things she doesn't want to do because the basic "textbook" says she will like them
- Me being playful and a bit aggressive instead of serious and sweet. 

One thing I have directly experienced. 
If you want to maximize how much she enjoys intercourse, DON'T get her to the rapture first and then have intercourse. Get her very warmed up, have sex, just before you are ready to finish, do what you need to do to get her to finish and then you go back to intercourse and complete. 

The reason for that last bit is simple. Most women, right after they hit the finish line, don't experience intercourse the same way as if they are really revved up, but haven't finished yet. When my W told me that long ago I changed our pattern accordingly. 

I also noticed that she really liked if I could get her warmed up and then last for a while when we had intercourse. So I worked on my endurance. 

As for kicking this off. You should drive. She opened the door for you to do that. If it was me, I would start on a day, that gives a few days in a row where the schedule isn't tight. And I would *tell her * in a low key way what the plan was. 

We are starting our 7 day challenge tonight. There are only two rules and they are both important. 
- We will get in bed by X o'clock each night so that we aren't tired, and so we have an hour together to play. 
- We both get in bed with a playful mindset

You need to have a good plan as to what to do if she is "running late". I am going to channel Athol here. If it was me I would shower and be dressed in shorts/t-shirt 15 minutes ahead of the appointed hour. If she was in the kitchen doing last minute "clean up" I would just stick my head in and say "its a quarter to the hour, how we looking here" this should be a happy tone - given what is about to occur. 

If you get the "I am running behind" - well if it was me I would just ask "what is left" and then start doing some of it. If she gave me the irritated "I've got it" - well that is a cue. I would let her take over, I would give her an amused look, AND I would show up promptly at the hour, and without a word pick her up and carry her to the bedroom. And since "play time" had started I would stick with that theme. If I got the "but x,y,z" still isn't done - while carrying her - I would laugh and say I rescheduled the health department check until day after tomorrow. It will be fine for the next hour. And I would not take "no" for an answer. 

If she persisted I would make the statement "I KNOW you don't think "task x getting done in the next hour" is more important than the health of our marriage. Or the lighter but edgier - "if you keep talking about trivia, I AM going to spank you". And don't be surprised if she DOES keep going. She really does seem to want more aggression from you. 



This will be YOUR hour every night. You and HER. Take control and make it happen. 

And if it does "work", and this routine seems positive for both of you. At the end of the week TELL HER what the go forward schedule is. And maybe that is a 2 and 2. Two nights a week you are responsible to initiate and at most she will put you off until the next day. And two nights SHE is responsible to let you know she is "available". And while 2 nights is the plan, unless someone gets sick they MUST initiate at least one night a week. 

Done right, it is the emotional equivalent of going to the gym....



frustr8dhubby said:


> We aren't doing it based on the pastor she is just looking for ideas to get herself back into the groove and I am ecstatic...


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## Browncoat (Mar 25, 2012)

Well said MEM.

I think the challenge is a fun idea. I really hope things go well for all you participants out there. 

If this week wasn't such a crazy week, I'd ask my wife about our doing it. This week we have her mother in town (for two weeks, haven't seen her in over a year) and we have two children doing two different performances this week.


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## MEM2020 (Aug 23, 2009)

Brown,
Up until 40 my desired frequency was daily. Reality was more like 4 times a week which worked out great. 

I don't know your wife. But if I put myself in her shoes:
- Historically intercourse was often painful
- It takes you a long time to "finish"

Every day - for her - gosh that just seems like a lot. Because she has a good shot at either being in pain or getting lockjaw.....

I know you have a lot of pent up desire. And frankly I don't think your wife was very considerate of your feelings about sex for most of the marriage. Even so, daily even for a week, seems like a lot to ask. 




Browncoat said:


> Well said MEM.
> 
> I think the challenge is a fun idea. I really hope things go well for all you participants out there.
> 
> If this week wasn't such a crazy week, I'd ask my wife about our doing it. This week we have her mother in town (for two weeks, haven't seen her in over a year) and we have two children doing two different performances this week.


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## Browncoat (Mar 25, 2012)

You're probably right MEM, she wouldn't likely enjoy it (so perhaps it's just as well we are so busy this week).

I still think for most people this is a fun idea though.


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## frustr8dhubby (Dec 23, 2010)

ilovechocolate said:


> Hi,
> Just wondering if you would be able to post a link for this?


There seem to be several variations so I am not sure which one she looked at to be honest. Just google "7 day sex challenge" and you should find several. Apparently even Lifetime is starting a series or something on it and looks like there is a "book".

Good luck!


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## frustr8dhubby (Dec 23, 2010)

MEM,

Thanks for the tips. Actually it is quite funny with my wife. Once we do get together, "getting her there" isn't an issue. She is easily orgasmic.

But your point about acting like a kid in a candy store is valid. All I actually said to her was that I was very pleased that she was finally showing some initiative to work with me. I haven't even mentioned the sex itself. And I haven't mentioned it since (her period started yesterday so we have to wait a week to start). I will wait to see if she actually starts it once that is over to see if she is really ready to finally work on this...

Thanks again.


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## Sawney Beane (May 1, 2011)

MEM11363 said:


> If she persisted I would make the statement "I KNOW you don't think "task x getting done in the next hour" is more important than the health of our marriage. "


Reading lots of posts here, I get the very strong impression that there are a LOT of people who DO think exactly that way. Unfortunately, I can't imagine that this approach does anything to disabuse them of this notion, for the simple reason that they don't believe that the health of _their_ marriage has anything whatsoever to do with anything as unimportant as _sex_...


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## Gaia (Apr 27, 2012)

I can't say the seven days of sex..... would do much of anything for me and my hubby... considering we did it on a daily basis more then once a day sometimes before i was pregnant.... but... for those wanting to this... You could also experiment doing it in different places during this time period such as truck/car, shower, kitchen, living room, ect ect... and different positions... Never even heard of this 7 day challenge before lol but glad I did now. It'll be an interesting topic to discuss with hubby.


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## MEM2020 (Aug 23, 2009)

F8,
You have an opportunity to "break the mold" here. Almost every sexually frustrated guy here says: "My W always has an O when we have sex so, why is she unwilling to have sex with me on a regular basis". 

You really should try to figure out what your W likes/dislikes about the overall experience. 

One woman who posted said it REALLY bothered her that her H lasted on average 30 seconds or so when they had intercourse. This was despite the fact that he slid under the sheets and got her off before hand every time they had sex. 

Basically - her experience of sex was receiving oral sex. She was very agitated about his lack of endurance - partly because he had no interest in addressing it. 








frustr8dhubby said:


> MEM,
> 
> Thanks for the tips. Actually it is quite funny with my wife. Once we do get together, "getting her there" isn't an issue. She is easily orgasmic.
> 
> ...


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## ladybird (Jun 16, 2010)

There is a TV show now.. 7 days of sex. I think it is on TLC!! 

I think it is pretty awesome idea to try..


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## waiwera (Sep 8, 2009)

We did this 12-15 years ago.

During the one LD time of my life...when I was home with and babies/toddlers.

I was always (please insert whiney voice here)" too tired for sex"
but enjoyed it once we got going. So we did a challenge like this...

It was fun...the first couple of nights H just shagged me as much as possible but later in the week he was bringing home chocolates and edible oils and giving me hours of pleasure. He also fixed all the leaking taps, washed laundry, cooked me dinner...etc... and smiled lots!

I believe this is a worthy experiement!


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## Bluemoon1 (Mar 29, 2012)

Just mentioned this to my wife, kind of knowing what the reaction would be, it went down like a lead balloon (as we say in England) just thought I would test the water :smthumbup: it's still very cold


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

Oh frustr8dhubby.....so happy for you !!

I can tell you, for me & my husband.....it isn't even about the Libido anymore, it is purely an "emotional" drive for each other. We start just cause we "want" to get there....there is a passion for connection ...and every time... it ultimately leads to 2 sweet orgasms. It is so much about the "*willingness*", the "*attitude*" in these things.

So excited to hear your wife is acknowledging & stepping up here for you ! :smthumbup:

Going from near nothing to 7 full days might be a bit overkill, but they say SEX begats more sex. Lets hope she catches the bug !


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## Aristotle (Apr 4, 2012)

Orgasm inside her, your semen has testosterone in it that absolutely will affect her sex drive. 7 days straight will be a huge boost. Anal being the best way since the colon absorbs quicker. 


7 days would be a huge boost. It will wear off though.


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## MEM2020 (Aug 23, 2009)

SB,
This is a good way to find out. To confirm that they don't care. That is useful info. Then again, she is on very thin ice suggesting a 7 day challenge and then immediately sabotaging the first night, is sadistic. 

In his case, carrying her over his shoulder, a smack on the bottom might be more effecitve than any comment. Either way, a lite alpha lift off has better odds than a soft, sweet approach. 





UOTE=Sawney Beane;709423]Reading lots of posts here, I get the very strong impression that there are a LOT of people who DO think exactly that way. Unfortunately, I can't imagine that this approach does anything to disabuse them of this notion, for the simple reason that they don't believe that the health of _their_ marriage has anything whatsoever to do with anything as unimportant as _sex_...[/QUOTE]


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## COguy (Dec 1, 2011)

anotherguy said:


> Sounds awful.
> 
> People like this give me the screaming heebie-jeebies. I mean - are you kidding me?
> Pastor Advocates Week Of Sex - YouTube
> ...


What exactly gives you the "heebie jeebies"? I've been to a lot of churches, all of them talk about how bad sex is before marriage. None of them talk about how awesome it is after marriage. Every church should be doing this.


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## Sawney Beane (May 1, 2011)

MEM11363 said:


> SB,
> This is a good way to find out. To confirm that they don't care. That is useful info. Then again, she is on very thin ice suggesting a 7 day challenge and then immediately sabotaging the first night, is sadistic.


Useful indeed, if one is prepared to use it...



> In his case, carrying her over his shoulder, a smack on the bottom might be more effecitve than any comment. Either way, a lite alpha lift off has better odds than a soft, sweet approach.


Hopefully! At least she doesn't sound like the sort of person who picking her up and slapping her arse is likely to get him arrested!


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## frustr8dhubby (Dec 23, 2010)

Well Saturday was Day 1. Went well, we had a little "session" before heading up to a neighborhood party.

Unfortunately, that is where it broke down. We both had WAY too many margaritas so we were shot all day Sunday... 

Guess we will see if we start up again today...


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