# Can You Name The Types Of Affairs Seen Here?



## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

Its an interesting topic and I'm interested in seeing people's answers and opinions on this.


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## BjornFree (Aug 16, 2012)

EA
EA/PA
ONS
Serial PA

PA with clowns


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## SomedayDig (Jul 17, 2012)

I dunno, brother...they're all for sh-t if ya ask me.

The Coward Affair - aka Exit affair
The It Just Happened Affair
The Drunk Affair
The I Really Hate You Just Don't Wanna Lose My Sh-t Affair

The list just writes itself...


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

Here's one that pisses me off since it affected this marriage:


The Reconnecting With Lost Love Affair - When they reconnect with each other through social media (i.e. facebook, classmates,etc). Then fall head over heels in LURRRVE for someone they haven't seen or met in decades. Thinking as if the OP is the same person from those many years ago. They actually think, act, and talk like teenagers when you read their communications.

My ex-WW cheated on me with this type of affair:


The Coworker/Classmate Affair - He's just a friend. We work on projects together. Never mind the fact that my classmates, family, and friends have seen you around town holding his hand, kissing. Never mind that three classmates independently verified that you spent the night in his hotel room while on a class trip. Never mind that I found a love letter that you wrote to him, but you claimed you wrote it for your friend. Never mind that my friends told me where you and OM were meeting regularly for lunch, so when I went there, your OM took off running when he saw me.


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## BjornFree (Aug 16, 2012)

The Classmate/Co-worker affair is probably a lot more common than any other type of affair. I've seen it happen myself a few times over the years. It also provides fodder for workplace gossip, and the female AP is considered a "slvt" and easy mark and her reputation is all but destroyed. They usually ended up leaving.


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

There are also those who "experiment". IOW, they are in a heterosexual relationship, yet cheat with same sex... or in homosexual relationship, but cheat with opposite sex.


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## Dday (Mar 31, 2013)

Revenge Affair
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Kermitty (Dec 27, 2012)

My spouse is my friend but I need to have sex affair.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## FourtyPlus (Dec 18, 2011)

Mexican Drug Cartel-Affair
Husband tells wife to sleep with other guys-Affair
Supermodel with 9 months old dog dumps cake-eater husband in less than 6 hours-Affair
....and I think there was a topic about first cousins...eww

The the Vanilla Affairs: (I don't mean this in a demeaning way)
EA to PA on FB
EA to PA thru txtng
EA @ Yahoo
PA @ work
Serial EA/PA
One timers both EA/PA
LTA's...CNN, MSNBC, NRA, USDA, FHA, HUD


PA with Clowns?????


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*The FB Affairs, seemingly the wave of the future!*


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

FourtyPlus said:


> PA with Clowns?????


If I remember right, it was three clowns (face paint and all) in a foursome, and it was video taped.


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

FourtyPlus said:


> PA with Clowns?????


Oh... yes... you missed that one.... it's better that way. Trust me.


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## StillSearching (Feb 8, 2013)

Facebook affair with Banker Clown! ( I should have called his wife)


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## Kermitty (Dec 27, 2012)

If husband tells wife to sleep with other guys, isn't that by definition not an affair....
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

Let's not forget the affair with trainer/instructor. In this case, the OP finds his wife in bed with her trainer/instructor, gets his ass kicked by the OM and is told to leave the bedroom and told to be good to his WW or else....since the OM was some type of special forces operator.

How can I go on?

Update jason h


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## BjornFree (Aug 16, 2012)

lordmayhem said:


> Let's not forget the affair with trainer/instructor. In this case, the OP finds his wife in bed with her trainer/instructor, gets his ass kicked by the OM and is told to leave the bedroom and told to be good to his WW or else....since the OM was some type of special forces operator.
> 
> How can I go on?
> 
> Update jason h


Do you subscribe to all these threads?

....

Does anybody remember the infamous JB100? Master troll that one...


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## Kermitty (Dec 27, 2012)

Wait a sec, what is the purpose of this thread? I may delete my posts if this is meant for entertainment purposes.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

SomedayDig said:


> I dunno, brother...they're all for sh-t if ya ask me.
> 
> The Coward Affair - aka Exit affair
> The It Just Happened Affair
> ...


And then there's the: "OMG! What was I *thinking*?? affair.


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## FourtyPlus (Dec 18, 2011)

Kermitty said:


> If husband tells wife to sleep with other guys, isn't that by definition not an affair....
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


If I remember it right he was too busy to take care of her and he told her to go get a boyfriend. She did and ended up sleeping around etc. There was also some kind of dominance-submissive thing going on between the husband and wife. It was on here a long time ago and like I said I don't remember it right. They ended up in R and seemed to be doing okay at the time. To this day I'm wondering if that was a real story.


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

BjornFree said:


> Do you subscribe to all these threads?


Some, not all. Too bad the clown thread got deleted.


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## FourtyPlus (Dec 18, 2011)

BjornFree said:


> Do you subscribe to all these threads?
> 
> ....
> 
> Does anybody remember the infamous JB100? Master troll that one...


That's aweful! So, is that a real story? The one with the trainer/instructor guy?


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## alte Dame (Aug 7, 2012)

How about the "I'm just discovering I'm gay" affair.

Here the poor BS sees signs of 'closeness' with a same-sex friend, but thinks he/she is going crazy for suspecting that it's not just platonic.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

lordmayhem said:


> Some, not all. *Too bad the clown thread got deleted.*


I was going to ask you where to find that one. That was one of my faves!


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## Shadow_Nirvana (Jan 1, 2013)

lordmayhem said:


> Let's not forget the affair with trainer/instructor. In this case, the OP finds his wife in bed with her trainer/instructor, gets his ass kicked by the OM and is told to leave the bedroom and told to be good to his WW or else....since the OM was some type of special forces operator.
> 
> How can I go on?
> 
> Update jason h


If those threads are true, I think I'll just go off myself in some garbage container somewhere and be done with it. Like seriously?!

Affairs between neighbours seems to also be popular.(One with the wife sleeping with the neighbor while the husband is on Ambien comes to mind. I think the thread is called False R.)


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## warlock07 (Oct 28, 2011)

men as BS:

Sociopathic WS(Lascarx's wife, Thorburn and Wrathful)

Serial WS with meek BS (who may or maynot suddenly find his balls)(mad6R)

Unemployed BS(SAHD) with a entitled WS(narcissistic)(Horizon, )

BS with a WS that has a higher earning and more important job than him(Bullwinkle)

BS with a WS who cheats with her boss or a OM in a higher position(edubs, Carlton, wrsteele, , malcom38, dingerdad )

WS that cheats with a coworker(eric415, AR, cabsy, Can't happen to me )

WS that cheats with a mutual friends during bad times(?) in marriage(Rand OM guy, Juicer's wife, CM, Dig, Dday)

WS that seeks out ex-bf or highschool sweetheart(EI, Lordmayhem's Ws)

WS that cheat to feel young(Mrs.Mathias)

Drunk ONS...

Lot of overlapping scenarios though...


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## Numbersixxx (Oct 10, 2012)

BjornFree said:


> Do you subscribe to all these threads?
> 
> ....
> 
> Does anybody remember the infamous JB100? Master troll that one...


Is his thread still available?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

warlock, you forgot the ones where gaming/online only occur....


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## sarcasmo (Feb 1, 2013)

My STBXW's was the "I don't want to hurt you by divorcing you, so I'll just check out of the marriage and have an affair instead" type. Because that wont hurt...


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## old timer (Nov 23, 2012)

The "I'm gonna make Second Life my Real Life and marry my European SL husband in RL - playing guitars and singing songs together about unicorns, butterflies and rainbows for the entertainment of our virtual SL friends in various virtual SL night clubs" affair.

*You can't make this sh!t up, folks.*


*(Disclaimer: No clowns were discovered or harmed in the production of this affair. No such claims are made concerning unicorns and butterflies)*

.


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

Plan 9 from OS said:


> Not sure if this thread was meant to be a "best of" type of rehash or if it was designed to review the types of affairs that are out there.


Why not both? One can see the different types of affairs from the stories here.


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## BjornFree (Aug 16, 2012)

The type of affairs that are the worst are ones where the WS openly flaunts the AP and humiliates the BS and the ones where the BS employs the wait and watch strategy. I'm not sure how people can swallow their pride to that extent.


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## EastCoastHopeless (Oct 10, 2012)

Here's one:
EA to partly PA with BS close friend. And ex close friend proceeds to plan and host a babyshower for BS. Once WH confesses months later then proceeds to say he didn't want me to find out because he didn't want to mess up the planning for the babyshower. Gee thanks. Sorry...went off on a slight tangent, but just thinking about it irks me.


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## Racer (Sep 24, 2009)

warlock07 said:


> men as BS:
> 
> Sociopathic WS(Lascarx's wife, Thorburn and Wrathful)..
> 
> ...


Ouch... good list. My WW hit several of those. 

I’m also of the mindset that almost every affair is a revenge affair of sorts. Fabricated or real issues with their BS became an excuse to go out and seek it elsewhere. That is their revenge for you not filling whatever pathetic reason they came up with. 

_Doesn’t even have to bad stuff... like you were trusting and a good husband and them believing they didn’t deserve that, aren’t and refuse to be the June Cleaver you treat them like, and going out to prove you are wrong about them._


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## Brokenshadow (May 3, 2013)

lordmayhem said:


> Let's not forget the affair with trainer/instructor. In this case, the OP finds his wife in bed with her trainer/instructor, gets his ass kicked by the OM and is told to leave the bedroom and told to be good to his WW or else....since the OM was some type of special forces operator.
> 
> How can I go on?
> 
> Update jason h


What the ever living F?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

*Re: Re: Can You Name The Types Of Affairs Seen Here?*



BjornFree said:


> The type of affairs that are the worst are ones where the WS openly flaunts the AP and humiliates the BS and the ones where the BS employs the wait and watch strategy. I'm not sure how people can swallow their pride to that extent.


:iagree:

Those situations are utterly incomprehensible to me. Might as well pay for the trip to bang the other man and ask her to promise to use condoms....oh wait.


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## barbados (Aug 30, 2012)

Racer said:


> I’m also of the mindset that almost every affair is a revenge affair of sorts. Fabricated or real issues with their BS became an excuse to go out and seek it elsewhere. That is their revenge for you not filling whatever pathetic reason they came up with.


:iagree:


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## Nujabes (May 16, 2013)

lordmayhem said:


> If I remember right, it was three clowns (face paint and all) in a foursome, and it was video taped.


Is there really a affair with a clown story around here or you guys just joking?!?! Cuz I'm interested in it :smthumbup:


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## warlock07 (Oct 28, 2011)

Types of BS


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## azteca1986 (Mar 17, 2013)

Racer said:


> Ouch... good list. My WW hit several of those.
> 
> I’m also of the mindset that almost every affair is a revenge affair of sorts. Fabricated or real issues with their BS became an excuse to go out and seek it elsewhere. That is their revenge for you not filling whatever pathetic reason they came up with.[/I]


But in many cases the 'reasons' for the revenge only get retro-fitted to the marriage once infidelity has already occurred.


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## NextTimeAround (Dec 15, 2011)

Inappropriate relationship: the prequel to many other forms of cheating.


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## cpacan (Jan 2, 2012)

*Sv: Can You Name The Types Of Affairs Seen Here?*

* The I thought you didn't care affair
* The I know I don't care affair
* The I want you to care affair
* The I still love you and I do care affair


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## Racer (Sep 24, 2009)

azteca1986 said:


> But in many cases the 'reasons' for the revenge only get retro-fitted to the marriage once infidelity has already occurred.


I disagree... Most the time they need an excuse that makes their circumstances "unique and special" to give themselves permission to do what they know is wrong. They do this before crossing that line because they need for it to be "ok" to do.


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

Racer said:


> I disagree... Most the time they need an excuse that makes their circumstances "unique and special" to give themselves permission to do what they know is wrong. They do this before crossing that line because they need for it to be "ok" to do.


This is why they re-write the marital history in their head to justify their cheating. It wouldn't matter if you did everything right, they will find a way to justify it in their own minds. We've seen some of those cases here and on d o c c o o l. I would link to a thread where a WW feels guilty because her husband is very good and they have a good marriage, but she just decided to have an affair.

Some people really do have an affair because they need that outside validation or they are selfish and don't think about what it would do to their spouse.


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## azteca1986 (Mar 17, 2013)

Racer said:


> I disagree... Most the time they need an excuse that makes their circumstances "unique and special" to *give themselves permission* to do what they know is wrong. They do this before crossing that line because they need for it to be "ok" to do.


Oh I see what you mean; "What I'm doing is not really cheating because I was forced into by LS not meeting my needs".


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## old timer (Nov 23, 2012)

Scarborough Fair


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## Kermitty (Dec 27, 2012)

There are those who cheat because sex with their spouse is there but not enjoyable. It is boring and unfulfilling and their SO is not open to trying other things. So they seek out someone to fill those desires. I would assume that there are other things missing in their relationship as well but that is the reason they site for their cheating. I have yet to come across this type of cheating on this board but it is very prevalent from my experience.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

azteca1986 said:


> Oh I see what you mean; "What I'm doing is not really cheating because I was forced into by LS not meeting my needs".


The whole "He drove me into the arms of another man" bullsh!t that I see a lot of cheaters use on their support forums.


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## diwali123 (Feb 17, 2012)

The "I'm not young and perky anymore and it's your fault you horrible man for trapping me in this horrible suburban life, I'm living for me for now on so screw you bastard!" 
Is common.


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## old timer (Nov 23, 2012)

The "I'm tired of living my life for others...
its time for ME now" affair. 

.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## NextTimeAround (Dec 15, 2011)

azteca1986 said:


> Oh I see what you mean; "What I'm doing is not really cheating because I was forced into by LS not meeting my needs".


My fiance says that he and his EA were "just friends." And when I called him on talking about our dates and sex life with her, he said, itsn't that what friends do?

What we all need to understand is that each relationship has the potential to see any other in direct competition with it. And when it comes an OSF, that potential is very high.


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## confused55 (Apr 30, 2011)

I don't know that you'd call it an affair but,

using prostitutes.


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## StillSearching (Feb 8, 2013)

confused55 said:


> I don't know that you'd call it an affair but,
> 
> using prostitutes.


Yea... That's a PA for sure. Is that not what you would call any woman that sleeps with a man she knows is married?


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## Brokenshadow (May 3, 2013)

The "I formed a connection with another addict in my state ordered support group" affair I'm currently living. 

Most ironic thing is that she's always said addicts are great liars. I thought it was an observation, not a confession.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## NextTimeAround (Dec 15, 2011)

Brokenshadow said:


> The "I formed a connection with another addict in my state ordered support group" affair I'm currently living.
> 
> Most ironic thing is that she's always said addicts are great liars. I thought it was an observation, not a confession.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


A friend of mine goes to al-Anon as she feels her husband drinks too much. She said she has noticed how some of the men take to the women participants. Of course, these women are at risk at the moment that they are trying to come to terms with a husband who has addictive behavior. I hear that AA has women only groups.


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## Brokenshadow (May 3, 2013)

NextTimeAround said:


> A friend of mine goes to al-Anon as she feels her husband drinks too much. She said she has noticed how some of the men take to the women participants. Of course, these women are at risk at the moment that they are trying to come to terms with a husband who has addictive behavior. I hear that AA has women only groups.


This program is state ordered, and participants are assigned to groups, but I hear you. It's a powder keg to put these men and women together, in my opinion. Her whole affair lasted barely a month, but evolved very very quickly.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## old timer (Nov 23, 2012)

MrBrains said:


> Yea... That's a PA for sure. Is that not what you would call any woman that sleeps with a man she knows is married?


Ummm, no

.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Acabado (May 13, 2012)

All of them fit the "i just want to be happy" category.


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## diwali123 (Feb 17, 2012)

I used to work with a woman who was having two affairs. One with one of her AA cohorts, both of them worked for our company.
They would skip meetings and go screw in one of their cars at the park. 
She was my boss and told me all this the first week I started.


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## SomedayDig (Jul 17, 2012)

warlock07 said:


> WS that cheats with a mutual friends during bad times(?) in marriage(Rand OM guy, Juicer's wife, CM, Dig, Dday)


Ugggg...he was sooo not a mutual friend. I never knew the f'ng scumbag except meeting him one time for about 10 minutes at a party.

Regret's pathology was cheats because she had an ego issue and had no idea how to f'ng communicate about her feelings when she miscarried. The cheating was an escape. Let's call it that and not say in any way, shape or f'ng form that I was a friend of that c**t.


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## workindad (May 7, 2011)

My experience was more like the

You can't give me nice things; so I cheated with someone who makes a heck of a lot less than you do, but I'll replace you with someone better who can give me the lifestyle I want-- affair.

That last part hasn't worked out quite yet.


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## Acabado (May 13, 2012)

The all in my life is horrible and I just needed a break/scape affair.


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## StillSearching (Feb 8, 2013)

One of mine was

The younger co-worker who needs a self esteem boost by screwing the smart older blonde in the office- affair.


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