# Signed up in 2017. Just getting around to this.



## MIB (Dec 20, 2017)

Hey, folks!

Signed up in 2017 when I stumbled upon this place. My wife kinda rocked my world with some truths about her lack of activities at the time and it changed a lot for me in ways I was not ready for. We were never in danger of being apart. Just needed to soak it all in. Some pretty common stuff… her low drive vs my high drive, and physical pain that hinders her enjoyment. 

Anyway, I found this place while researching and signed up. Was gonna share my situation and get some perspective from others. I just never did end up posting anything.

I did find the site intriguing, so I often read here. I finally posted in a couple threads recently. I figured, since I’m joining in the conversations now, I should introduce myself.

Hello.


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## BeyondRepair007 (Nov 4, 2021)

MIB said:


> Hey, folks!
> 
> Signed up in 2017 when I stumbled upon this place. My wife kinda rocked my world with some truths about her lack of activities at the time and it changed a lot for me in ways I was not ready for. We were never in danger of being apart. Just needed to soak it all in. Some pretty common stuff… her low drive vs my high drive, and physical pain that hinders her enjoyment.
> 
> ...


Welcome aboard! Glad to have you posting!

So did all your marriage issues get resolved? Not prying I just couldn't tell from your opening post.


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## MIB (Dec 20, 2017)

BeyondRepair007 said:


> Welcome aboard! Glad to have you posting!
> 
> So did all your marriage issues get resolved? Not prying I just couldn't tell from your opening post.


No. They won’t be resolved. I just need to deal with it. I’m 55 and she is 62. We‘ve been married about 10 years. As a married couple, our love is deep and we are solid. Sexually, we had a great run. I shouldn’t complain, but I can’t just not want her. She has never been a sexually creative thinker, but has always been open to my lead and has always enjoyed whatever we did. Just that her needs/desire has waned in the last 5 years and mine have not. 

I do not hold it against her nor am I angry with her. I just have a hard time dealing with my desires and feel guilty for where they take me. I haven’t and would never step out on her, but I resort to things I do not believe I should be viewing. She is a hard worker and is in great shape. She would run circles around gals half her age. Still, I need to recognize reality and honor our natural progression with age.

I just live in perpetual frustration and really miss how things were. I just need to deal with it.


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## BeyondRepair007 (Nov 4, 2021)

MIB said:


> No. They won’t be resolved. I just need to deal with it. I’m 55 and she is 62. We‘ve been married about 10 years. As a married couple, our love is deep and we are solid. Sexually, we had a great run. I shouldn’t complain, but I can’t just not want her. She has never been a sexually creative thinker, but has always been open to my lead and has always enjoyed whatever we did. Just that her needs/desire has waned in the last 5 years and mine have not.
> 
> I do not hold it against her nor am I angry with her. I just have a hard time dealing with my desires and feel guilty for where they take me. I haven’t and would never step out on her, but I resort to things I do not believe I should be viewing. She is a hard worker and is in great shape. She would run circles around gals half her age. Still, I need to recognize reality and honor our natural progression with age.
> 
> I just live in perpetual frustration and really miss how things were. I just need to deal with it.


There are lots of stories on TAM just like yours. 

Some live with it and others pull the plug, even later in life.

Aging sucks. (I'm 59)

Only thing I'd say is to lose the guilt. If you're going to accept a way of life then accept it. If you can't get past guilt, then don't accept the way of life in the first place.

Best of luck to you. Glad to have you here.


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## frenchpaddy (May 31, 2021)

happy you have started helping us out , everyone can see a different side to a story


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