# Questions for the ladies



## PAPS18 (May 17, 2012)

Hi ladies, questions for you that tie into sex with my wife. 

Any time my wife takes any antibiotic, she ends up with a yeast infection. She knows this will happen but doctors will not prescribe the pill to help with yeast until she starts having symptoms-which means it is too late. Is it really that common that women get yeast infections from antibiotics?? These yeast infections of course mean no sex for us, and it seems to take at least 2 weeks for them to clear up. I know we need to wait because I can get infected as well so I have read-not sure how long but we always seem to wait at least 2-3 weeks. 

Another question, do any of you take birth control for irregular periods. My wife does and it does help regulate her, but I had a V done many years ago so she could get off the pill as we knew our family was complete. The pill I have read can bring a woman's sex drive way down, but I do understand the need to regulate her cycle. A true catch 22. Just curious because I don't get all of this stuff-my wife has a very low interest in sex to start with, and then you have constant battles like yeast infections and taking BC pills, it takes away all her interest-or so it seems. So, that leads to my second question-do you believe that BC pills DO indeed impact your desire for sex?


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## citygirl4344 (Mar 4, 2016)

Hmm. Well I am one of those lucky women who has never had a yeast infection. But I would think if it was bad enough for an antibiotic then yeah it would take awhile to clear up.
I will leave it there though as I have no experience.

As for BC pull some women do still need it even if not for contraceptive use. Regulating periods is one..some use it if they have painful periods. 
With me I find the pill does not decrease my desire for sex but it does make me moody. 
In the end it affects women differently.
You are taking a synthetic hormone in order to regulate your hormones. Sounds so healthy lol.
But my point is there are lots of side affects and not all women experience the same ones.

Here is a question..do you think she using it as an excuse not to have sex? Ie the yeast infections and low drive from pills?


Sent from my iPhone


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

My wife gets the yeast infection too with antibiotics. You need to discuss that with your doctor at same time the antibiotics are being prescribed. If she has a history of that, then the doctor should know and prescribe the yeast Rx at same time. My wife would get Rx for a oral pill that cleared it up. If her doctor will not prescribe the yeast Rx during same visit, even with history of infections, your wife needs to find a new doctor.

Another thing to try is for your wife to call the doctor office and say she has a yeast infection. See if they will call in a Rx to your local pharmacy. Now she has a pill at home ready in case she needs it. When she starts with antibiotic, take the yeast Rx immediately or when appropriate. Then, have your wife call in for another refill of the yeast Rx as a replacement. In this way you are always one step ahead.

We took a cruise to Mexico once and they had the same pill for yeast in the pharmacy as OTC, so we got a few. That was cool as it avoided hassle with the doctor.


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## anonmd (Oct 23, 2014)

It is very common to get the yeast infection after anti-biotics. Monistat (and maybe others?) is available OTC so there is not really a need to back for a prescription. Whether or not it is advisable to start the Monistat at the same time or a few days later or wait for symptoms is a question for the Dr.


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## PAPS18 (May 17, 2012)

Well, the yeast infections are a result of sinus infections-doctor gives her antibiotic to clear up the sinus infection, which then the antibiotic causes the yeast infection every time-or so she says. Thing with that is, I can't tell if she has a yeast infection-so yes, she could certainly use that as an excuse to avoid sex (I like to think she is not that selfish, but honestly she does seem pretty disinterested in sex and knows I do want it, so that would be an easy way to put the brakes on it). 

As for the BC pills, she went off them and her drive did seem to go up-granted, she has NEVER had a very high drive except when trying to conceive. But she went off the pill a few years back and we went from having sex maybe 1-2x a month which is our average to maybe 3-4x a month. When I say a month, really just a 3 week month because her period is the 4th week and sex has always been off limits during the week of her period. 

What does make me think my wife is selfish is that never during our nearly 25 years together has she helped me out when she is off limits-meaning, when she has the yeast infections or her period she has never taken the initiative to say, hmmm, I know he probably would appreciate a hand job while I am not able to have intercourse. She is the lower drive person and yet I have gotten her off manually under the sheets many times when I knew we didn't have time or privacy to have intercourse-obviously it is easier to be discreet under the sheets getting a woman off (say if a kid happens to open the door, lot easier to look like you are cuddling while getting her off than jacking me off), but my point is, I have done that many times for her because I love getting her off and want to do it. It is clearly obvious to me after all these years that my happiness sexually is not nearly as important to her-or she is just VERY naive sexually-I honestly think it is a combo of the two but more likely he being so naive-sex is so far removed from a priority for her (she has admitted this) that her mind doesn't work that way to process it-like, wow, I know he is horny and I could at least offer a helping hand-she doesn't think like that.


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## PAPS18 (May 17, 2012)

Her doctor will call it in, but has said don't take the pill until you have the symptoms. Well, seems to me once you have the symptoms it is too late. But maybe a bigger question I have is, once they take the pill, how quickly does it work and then how quickly is it safe to have intercourse again. I know the infection can be spread to men, so I do appreciate her protecting me in that way, but sometimes I do question it. She has done the OTC meds, monistat and those do not clear it up like the pill the doctor gives-it is a one trick pony-one pill, knocks it out-but again, how quickly does it knock it out.


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

Read the package insert on the one trick pony-one pill or go to the drug company's website. Wife gets the same pill. Works great. Ask the doctor the questions you posted. That is what you pay them for. You can call the office, talk to nurse and ask her to get back to you. 

If you are uncertain, wear a condom when she has the infections.


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## brooklynAnn (Jun 29, 2015)

I too get yeast infections with antibiotic treatments. The key to that is that you have to avoid certain foods like sugar. Also, you need to eat yogurt with live active cultures and quite a bit of it. Also, get an OTC yeast ointment. (of course you need to make certain that you are not getting prolong infection and it's just from the good bacteria dying. And you don't have some else going on)

When I was younger I used to get irregular period and was on BC. It made me very low drive and my boobs were very sensitive. They hurt.

Sounds to me like you guys don't have a good sex life and that is the issue here. If you have been married that long then you guys are in the late forty's. You wife might have started to enter into peri or menopause. That alone can have an impact on her sex drive.

You might suggest she gets off the pill. Also, she might want to get a full blood work done. With hormones and thyroid checked. 

Some women lose their drive during peri/menopause, others gain their drive in peri. Hopefully you wife will gain hers if she is in peri. But if not you cant expect a women who never liked sex to start liking sex when she is in menopause. 

So, you either have a talk about what you guys can do to change your sexual relationship or just learn to live with it as you have been doing.


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## PAPS18 (May 17, 2012)

Thanks BrooklynAnn, very good response. I have long sense just accepted what we have, and do make the best of it because I am not leaving over lack of sex for sure. I don't pressure her any longer-I don't initiate at all (well I do every now and again as I mention below) because she has admitted during talks over the years that sex is just not a priority for her-and she is sorry she can't be the woman I want her to be. So, when told that, you realize this is it-I live with it or leave and I have many more reasons to stay than to go. 

I have questioned her on the pill, she says she needs to stay on it because it was causing her issues when she did go off of it-she would randomly bleed and she didn't know when it was going to happen-which caused some scary moments-her doctor put her on the pill and has kept her on it for the past 3 years or so I guess. She doesn't want the irregular situation to happen again so as long as her doctor will let her stay on it, I am sure she will. She has had blood work done, no thyroid or other issues. 

Bluein, I just don't question her about it but honestly, after all this time, it just does not good to ask her because I know the answer before I ask. Last weekend I actually did try to initiate again-probably has been 6 months since I tried to initiate with her, and she said I am still having issues with the infection-she had just taken the pill during that week. I THOUGHT the pill would clear things up and all would be good. One kid was away and the other was in bed, I thought the timing was right so I rolled over to cuddle and she immediately shot me down. While I do appreciate the immediate response-nothing worse than getting worked up and then shot down, it left me shaking my head yet again-and thus I will likely go another 6 months before I try to initiate again.


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## bluezone (Jan 7, 2012)

PAPS18 said:


> Hi ladies, questions for you that tie into sex with my wife.
> 
> Any time my wife takes any antibiotic, she ends up with a yeast infection. She knows this will happen but doctors will not prescribe the pill to help with yeast until she starts having symptoms-which means it is too late. Is it really that common that women get yeast infections from antibiotics?? These yeast infections of course mean no sex for us, and it seems to take at least 2 weeks for them to clear up. I know we need to wait because I can get infected as well so I have read-not sure how long but we always seem to wait at least 2-3 weeks.
> 
> Another question, do any of you take birth control for irregular periods. My wife does and it does help regulate her, but I had a V done many years ago so she could get off the pill as we knew our family was complete. The pill I have read can bring a woman's sex drive way down, but I do understand the need to regulate her cycle. A true catch 22. Just curious because I don't get all of this stuff-my wife has a very low interest in sex to start with, and then you have constant battles like yeast infections and taking BC pills, it takes away all her interest-or so it seems. So, that leads to my second question-do you believe that BC pills DO indeed impact your desire for sex?


OP, a lot of women get yeast infections when they take antibiotics, ESPECIALLY if they have excess "yeast" to begin with. Google "candida" symptoms. Your wife has to be proactive when she takes antibiotics and eat yogurt with live cultures as well as possibly taking a good probiotic. (She should not take the yogurt or probiotic at the same time as the antibiotic or they will cancel each other out). She can also check out fermented vegetables, such as Kimchi. 

She should also stay away from sugar and bread, pasta and alcohol etc while she is on antibiotics as it will feed the yeast. Candida also affects sex drive. I believe many women (and some men) suffer from Candida unknowingly.


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## brooklynAnn (Jun 29, 2015)

Your wife needs to see and have a gyn screening. It should not take that long for a typical yeast infection to go away. She needs to have a pap and a sample smear to check for other things. Especially if she is prone to bleeding.

Sounds like she needs a female doc who she would be more comfortable with.


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## Cream2sugarsplz (Mar 28, 2016)

PAPS18 said:


> Hi ladies, questions for you that tie into sex with my wife.
> 
> Any time my wife takes any antibiotic, she ends up with a yeast infection. She knows this will happen but doctors will not prescribe the pill to help with yeast until she starts having symptoms-which means it is too late. Is it really that common that women get yeast infections from antibiotics?? These yeast infections of course mean no sex for us, and it seems to take at least 2 weeks for them to clear up. I know we need to wait because I can get infected as well so I have read-not sure how long but we always seem to wait at least 2-3 weeks.
> 
> Another question, do any of you take birth control for irregular periods. My wife does and it does help regulate her, but I had a V done many years ago so she could get off the pill as we knew our family was complete. The pill I have read can bring a woman's sex drive way down, but I do understand the need to regulate her cycle. A true catch 22. Just curious because I don't get all of this stuff-my wife has a very low interest in sex to start with, and then you have constant battles like yeast infections and taking BC pills, it takes away all her interest-or so it seems. So, that leads to my second question-do you believe that BC pills DO indeed impact your desire for sex?


Hi! New here and wanted to comment b/c I sympathize with your wife. After being recently diagnosed with PCOS and being off BC, I've been prone to a lot of unfortunate hormonal imbalances, yeast infections included (though I can't comment to the antibiotics link)...

Has she ever tried a supplement called Macca? It is something that I take in either pill form or add a spoonful of gelatinized powder to my protein shakes. It's one of those miracle root type things and has tons of hormone balancing properties. It has certainly worked for me, my husband can attest to that! 

Also, something I take on the regular (along with probiotics) is AZO yeast pills (can be found on Amazon). They've really seemed to keep things at bay. 

Good luck to you both!


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

brooklynAnn said:


> Your wife needs to see and have a gyn screening. It should not take that long for a typical yeast infection to go away. She needs to have a pap and a sample smear to check for other things. Especially if she is prone to bleeding.
> 
> Sounds like she needs a female doc who she would be more comfortable with.


brooklynAnn, you pointed out that the bleeding could be due to perimenopause/menopause. I think you may be correct on that. I turned 40 last year and for the last few years, mine have been irregular. Unless this goes back to when she was even younger, I suspect it may be due to peri/menopause. I agree, she should get tests and screening to be certain, though. And, what she believes to be a yeast infection could be something else, especially if taking that long to clear completely. It may be a small yeast infection compounded by another issue. Again, good idea to get it checked, for sure. My mom believed she had yeast infections and her doctor treated her as such... turned out to be fungal, which requires a totally different treatment.


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## Livvie (Jan 20, 2014)

Yeast is a fungus...


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## brooklynAnn (Jun 29, 2015)

Livvie said:


> Yeast is a fungus...


It is. But they need different kinds of meds to kill them. Normal or even prescription strength meds will not work on a fungus infection, that works on normal yeast infection. 

The way they are treated is totally different. We are talking about different organisms.


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

Livvie said:


> Yeast is a fungus...





brooklynAnn said:


> It is. But they need different kinds of meds to kill them. Normal or even prescription strength meds will not work on a fungus infection, that works on normal yeast infection.
> 
> The way they are treated is totally different. We are talking about different organisms.


Yes, sorry, thank you, brooklynAnn. My doctors have always put yeast in a separate category from other fungi. As you said, it requires a completely different treatment.


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## PAPS18 (May 17, 2012)

She is going soon, and she does see a female doctor, I am sure she will get the normal checks-she is good about seeing a doctor if she has any issues and this will be her yearly check-now, she is not going to mention anything about sex with the doc because in her mind there is nothing to ask about (I sometimes wonder if the doc ever asks her anything about her sex life)-she believes she is as normal as normal can be-which means she has children and job that both are much higher priority than her physical relationship with husband. That part of the relationship is not viewed as important to her-and she has admitted as much-saying sex is just not a priority and apologizing for not being the woman I want her to be. Pretty cut and dry. If I can get her away from kids/job, she becomes a little more sexual but I can't afford to take her away very often nor do we have a chance with busy lives/kids activities. Course she never suggests the two of us get away or even go on a date, I always have to arrange everything. I don't mind most of the time but it would be nice if she would at least suggest it, that would tell me she has given it some thought. I realize that there are more important things in the world but doesn't hurt to vent from time to time-so thanks for letting me vent a little and also learn more about women's health issues.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

Maybe this was covered already.. I have only had I think 2 yeast infections ...... they were right after taking Antibiotics ... since then I learned always eat yogurt and take these every day -during my treatment *>>* .....never had another one.



I have the Copper paragard IUD for birth control.. no hormones ..can be kept in for up to 12 yrs... can't feel it. I love mine.. but some women have problems with these.. so it's something to talk to the OBGYN about.. 

I remember one thread here where this woman got off the pill.. and WOW.. her eyes were opened, she couldn't get enough sex.. she felt so bad for rejecting her husband all those years... it was like a whole new world.. they can diminish the sex drive in many women, one of the side effects, unfortunately.


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

I can't really address the pill issue, as I only took them for 8 years in my 20's (I am 51) and highly recommend that no woman EVER take the pill - they wreak havoc with a woman's body. Awful awful things BC pills are!!

As for the yeast infections, I get one EVERY SINGLE TIME I take antibiotics, so for the longest time if my dr prescribed antibiotics he prescribed Diflucan at the same time. When I would take my last antibiotic pill I took the diflucan at the same time. (I think Diflucan is OTC now though - at least here in Canada). Anyway. The last time I took a Diflucan I felt like I was going to die - I had a very bad reaction to it. Thankfully I haven't needed antibiotics since, but when I do I plan on trying yogurt, coconut oil, and/or garlic to combat the yeast - I will have to look up exactly how to use them because I haven't really done much research into it.

Probiotics in general are something that everyone should really ingest more of. Not only yogurt, and not as pills, but in natural form. I get mine from yogurt, kefir, kombucha and raw milk, as well as home made fermented foods like sauerkraut. Science is just starting to realize how important these little critters are to overall general health and well being, starting from the time we're born.


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## Anonymous07 (Aug 4, 2012)

SA mentioned it, but next time she has to take an anti-biotic, make sure she takes a probiotic at the same time. That can help her body 1) fight off the bacterial infection and 2) keep the rest of her body in balance. I'm unfortunately in the middle of my first yeast infection(dang pregnancy hormone craziness), but I don't see it as a "no sex" rule. You can always use condoms to prevent you getting the infection, too. 

As for hormonal imbalance issues, has she tried taking any supplements? There are a few she can look into that might be able to help(Maca root, magnesium, Vitex/Chaste Tree Berry, etc.). Maybe both of you can read about them and see if she'll give them a try, but she would have to go off the pill and let her body get the synthetic hormones out of her system. She can try it out for a few months and if it doesn't go well, then go back to the pill, but maybe try a different birth control pill since there are many to choose from and they all have slightly different side effects. A different pill may not effect her libido as much.


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## PAPS18 (May 17, 2012)

If BC pills are so bad, and in case of my wife-not needed for BC since I was fixed many years ago, I wonder why her doctor continues to put her on them-she was off of them for a few years but then started having heavy periods-so bad that she was having to always bring a change of clothes to work just in case, and not regular periods-so her doctor put her back on them-after doing some test to rule out any issues with her ovaries/uterus etc or any other health issues. It just seems to me that the doctor would not put a mid 40's woman on BC pills if they were so bad for her. It helps my wife regulate her periods for sure-which gives her peace of mind. Again, lack of sex drive is not important to her, so the pill seems to work and that is what she prefers. I have read about the side effects of BC pills but that is because I throughout the years have been searching for why her drive so low-but then again, it has always been on the lower end even when newlywed-but she has been on the pill on/off since we have been married for 25 years. Just seems to me if the pill has so many bad side effects the doctor (who is female) would advise something else. I have mentioned to her before that I have read about side effects of the pill, she just says how she needs to be on them because they really do keep her regulated.

If lack of sex drive was important to her, I am sure she would ask to try another pill, but unfortunately that much less a concern (actually no concern I believe) when compared to regulating her cycle. I can't related to what you all have to go through monthly, so really I just have to live with the situation and also realize that as I age, my T levels will keep dropping and maybe I will not care about sex with my wife. Oh and as for condoms with the yeast infection, I actually suggested that the last time but she was not interested because she said it would make things worse-itching and pain.


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

PAPS18 said:


> If BC pills are so bad, and in case of my wife-not needed for BC since I was fixed many years ago, I wonder why her doctor continues to put her on them-she was off of them for a few years but then started having heavy periods-so bad that she was having to always bring a change of clothes to work just in case, and not regular periods-so her doctor put her back on them-after doing some test to rule out any issues with her ovaries/uterus etc or any other health issues. It just seems to me that the doctor would not put a mid 40's woman on BC pills if they were so bad for her. It helps my wife regulate her periods for sure-which gives her peace of mind. Again, lack of sex drive is not important to her, so the pill seems to work and that is what she prefers. I have read about the side effects of BC pills but that is because I throughout the years have been searching for why her drive so low-but then again, it has always been on the lower end even when newlywed-but she has been on the pill on/off since we have been married for 25 years. Just seems to me if the pill has so many bad side effects the doctor (who is female) would advise something else. I have mentioned to her before that I have read about side effects of the pill, she just says how she needs to be on them because they really do keep her regulated.


It's a matter of opinion, and risk vs benefit. Most mainstream doctors probably don't agree that the pill is bad for women. Many women don't experience bad side effects, or at least not till they're older. But think about it. The pill consists of fake hormones. Chemical hormones, not the ones your body makes. The endocrine system is the least understood system in the body. So how can anyone know - really know - that BC pills are not going to be really bad for you??


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

My doc put me on the pill when I was just under 40 to 'regulate my cycle'. Within 2 months I was back in his office complaining of feeling 'off'. He took my BP and discovered it was through the roof and sent me home to bed with a prescription for blood pressure meds. So now I have to take those, probably for the rest of my life according to him. Any woman who smokes is not supposed to be on the pill if she's over 35 and smokes because of the huge risk of stroke. Doctors know all this yet still prescribe it like candy, and women use it to do things to themselves like skip periods entirely if it's inconvenient for them to have one, like on their honeymoon. It's scary, really.


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## Zanne (Dec 7, 2012)

.


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## calmwinds (Dec 10, 2012)

Hi PAPS, I've been an RN for 25 years, and yes, it is very common for antibiotics to cause yeast infections. It is also common to have a doctor who believes you get them EVERY time who will prescribe the medication. That being said...if she knows she's going to be put on antibiotics, she should start eating yogurt twice per day (the kind with active cultures), which will help reduce the severity. Also, if she's a carb-o-holic, likes eating breads/pasta, she probably has a yeasty gut to begin with. She could also begin using vinegar or boric acid to decrease the yeast population as well, or purchase an antifungal cream over the counter.
As for the pill, also quite commonly prescribed to regulate her moon cycle and to decrease the length and severity of symptoms. This comes with a cost, of course, of the possibility of blood clots and an array of other symptoms, and most doctors don't like to prescribe them after she reaches a certain age, because the risk of side-effects become greater. It is odd to me that a woman of her age would still be given the pill. Most doctors would discuss the possibility of surgical intervention as the lesser of two evils at her age if they were that heavy and difficult, although most perimenopausal women do have heavy, irregular cycles for a while.


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## PAPS18 (May 17, 2012)

Thanks Calmwinds, lot of good information-she does try to eat yogurt when first put on the antibiotics-she does TRY to prevent them and of course she gets her doctor to call in the one magic pill as well. She knows enough about yeast infections that I don't say much to her about them-I don't want to nag and I don't have a vagina so I try to let her be the boss of herself. Now, the pill I have said stuff to her because the reason I had the V was so she could get off the pill. SO, when she said she was going to ask to go back on for regulation, I did balk at that-but again, it is her body and she knows best I figure. She is going soon to get her yearly check, I would love if the doctor would consider taking her off as you suggest. Yes, it might cause her some issues which I would hate but I think it is the best for her body as I read all the side effects. She is 45 and I was fixed, and you can't cheat what is eventually going to happen with her body with menopause. I do know she will beg the doctor to keep her on the pill I feel sure-she is such a big fan of being planned.


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## SecondTime'Round (Jan 15, 2015)

I can't speak about the pill since I'm not on it (hormonal birth control makes me bleed all the time instead of regulating my periods). 

I think she needs to find a doctor who will prescribe the Diflucan every time she's prescribed an antibiotic. It's not a big deal, so I don't know why a dr. would not prescribe that. Mine does, and that's just my GP (i.e. if I have a sinus infection) and not my GYN.

With that said, I agree with @calmwinds about the yogurt with active cultures. I've actually gotten rid of a yeast infection by using no meds and only eating plain yogurt with live cultures - about 4 bowls of it a day (mixed with fruit for flavor). Turns your poop green, but it works! If she really loads up on the right kind of yogurt as soon as she starts taking the antibiotic, it will probably help a lot.


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## PAPS18 (May 17, 2012)

Zanne, thanks for your reply. As for sinus infections, she has been on so man doctor visits, had the balloon out patient surgery, had allergies test etc etc, she is just prone to them and thing about sinus issues, you get the better but the come back-unless you can completely knock them out-it is VERY frustrating. As for the excuses for sex, YEP, I know she does makes excuses and I try my best to not be offended-I know she loves me, she just doesn't love having sex with me, even just once a week which bugs me but it is what it is. I have told her that I am done initiating and that also cuts down on the amount of sex but as I told her, that part of our marriage is almost dead to me now because I know she just isn't interested-so I don't bother getting my hopes up even when the kids are spending the night away, there will always be a reason she can't or doesn't want to. The yeast infections and sinus issues, along with her periods lasting longer and longer etc, just fewer days each month. Summer is usually our best season because the sinus/allergy issues are not around, but still since I don't try, I wait on her and that just rarely happens. Funny thing to me, she still asks me if I want to-I laugh every time she asks because I have told her so many times before-I am a GREEN light-doesn't matter if I am sound asleep, have a cold, tired, etc, I will ALWAYS be a yes. Stomach bug or flu would be the only time I would ever say no. I can't imagine knowing that if I want sex, I know I will get it. Must be nice but still we are no more than 1x a week, usually 1x every 2 weeks.


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## PAPS18 (May 17, 2012)

Her doctor does it for her if she asks, she has had two infections in the last couple months, the first she didn't ask until too late, the second time she did ask and started feeling the infection coming on and took the pill on like a Tue or Wed, but when I tried to initiate sex with her on a Sat night, she told me no that she was still having issues with her infection. I think it was an excuse plain and simple because I offered to use a condom-but she said there was still some itching/pain and she wanted to play it safe, so I said ok. I mean, if your wife feels that way, why push the envelope so I don't.


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