# It’s the hygiene for me



## onelife2live (Aug 12, 2021)

Jumping straight in with this topic. I think I am turned off by my husband. He always expects sex by saying, “I got a lot built up.” This crap really gets on my nerves. He can come home from work and expect to get it popping just like that without taking the extra steps in getting cleaned up. He is at work all day in a warehouse, it’s the summer time, you have done #1 & #2 all day and expects happy endings from me without washing yourself? It’s a big turn off to me.

Also, I do not like the fact that there’s no foreplay ever or the fact he doesn’t care to make me have an orgasm.As long as he’s done, that’s all that matter and I’m left having to finish off myself. So now it’s been at least 3 or 4 weeks and no sex which I’m totally ok with. He even expected me to have sex with him after 2 days of not bathing. I hate smells and body funk, who doesn’t?

In the mornings, before I can do anything or to get my day started or even step foot out the house is a MUST for me to brush my teeth, floss and rinse. He likes to wake up and stir around early. He doesn’t brush his teeth until hours hours later in the day before work and expects to kiss over me. There’s been plenty times when he would go to the gym, track or run an errand without brushing. It turns me off esp when he tries to kiss me with all that breathe. I have to turn away.
Am I’m over exaggerating or your a s s is too old to be carrying on like this?


----------



## Jamieboy (Jan 14, 2021)

Its gross, but equally I would have no problem addressing it with my wife, on the occasions either of us tried to instigate when less than fresh, we have instructed each other to sort out the hygiene first.

On the teeth brushing, that is just nauseating I don't blame you for being turned off. However, you need to address it and not try to ignore it.

Its fundamentally about respect for you


----------



## MarmiteC (Jun 28, 2021)

Hi OneLife2Live,

I notice this is your 3rd post now. Firstly about how your husband seemingly helps his Mom more than you, secondly about how he ill manages finances and now about his lack of personal hygiene. I think it's important to put all these things in once place. Combined these make a much bigger issue in your marriage and one I see needs addressing. Or have you already decided that you feel unappreciated, unsupported, like you have to be the one to do everything, for so long, that you've made up your mind that it's time to move on? (Your name seems to infer this.)


----------



## ccpowerslave (Nov 21, 2020)

Your hygiene requirements are not unusual or over the top.

As for him not caring about your orgasms that is not ok.


----------



## Jamieboy (Jan 14, 2021)

MarmiteC said:


> Hi OneLife2Live,
> 
> I notice this is your 3rd post now. Firstly about how your husband seemingly helps his Mom more than you, secondly about how he ill manages finances and now about his lack of personal hygiene. I think it's important to put all these things in once place. Combined these make a much bigger issue in your marriage and one I see needs addressing. Or have you already decided that you feel unappreciated, unsupported, like you have to be the one to do everything, for so long, that you've made up your mind that it's time to move on? (Your name seems to infer this.)


Hmmm didn’t spot this, I have seen this script play out in response to the complainer justifying seeing someone else. Hope I’m wrong, but cognitive dissonance is a powerful tool in the unfaithful’s armoury


----------



## hinterdir (Apr 17, 2018)

onelife2live said:


> Jumping straight in with this topic. I think I am turned off by my husband. He always expects sex by saying, “I got a lot built up.” This crap really gets on my nerves. He can come home from work and expect to get it popping just like that without taking the extra steps in getting cleaned up. He is at work all day in a warehouse, it’s the summer time, you have done #1 & #2 all day and expects happy endings from me without washing yourself? It’s a big turn off to me.
> 
> Also, I do not like the fact that there’s no foreplay ever or the fact he doesn’t care to make me have an orgasm.As long as he’s done, that’s all that matter and I’m left having to finish off myself. So now it’s been at least 3 or 4 weeks and no sex which I’m totally ok with. He even expected me to have sex with him after 2 days of not bathing. I hate smells and body funk, who doesn’t?
> 
> ...


Valid concerns. 

Concerns that should EASILY be cleared up with some good old fashioned loving.....respectful.....blunt communication explaining exactly how you feel. 

I love you....I want you....I need to you wash up and freshen up first. 
I love you....sex is great.....I don't mind a quickie from time to time but I also need ROMANCE and COURTING and FOREPLAY sometimes too, that makes it more enjoyable for me. 

Any normal person would make the proper adjustments.


----------



## MarmiteC (Jun 28, 2021)

Jamieboy said:


> Hmmm didn’t spot this, I have seen this script play out in response to the complainer justifying seeing someone else. Hope I’m wrong, but cognitive dissonance is a powerful tool in the unfaithful’s armoury


I think sometimes here we can be too quick to assume infidelity. Sometimes, once you start seeing one thing about a person, you start seeing other things also also. If your general mindset is negative, that's all you can be looking for, you forget the good stuff.


----------



## Jamieboy (Jan 14, 2021)

MarmiteC said:


> I think sometimes here we can be too quick to assume infidelity. Sometimes, once you start seeing one thing about a person, you start seeing other things also also. If your general mindset is negative, that's all you can be looking for, you forget the good stuff.


Probably right, when stood in a pumpkin field, all you see are the pumpkins. I did say I hope I was wrong, but I take your point


----------



## She'sStillGotIt (Jul 30, 2016)

*


onelife2live said:



Am I’m over exaggerating or your a s s is too old to be carrying on like this?

Click to expand...

*You married a disgusting pig.

Why on earth you service this selfish, disgusting pig when he pops his nasty ass through the door telling you he's "full," and why allow him to selfishly not give a rat's ass about YOUR needs is really* your own fault*. Come on, this isn't rocket science, is it?

The next time the pig comes home looking to 'unload,' I'd hand him a wet towel and a laptop playing porn and tell him to have at it. Since I have a lot less patience for disgusting pig men, I'd probably *also* be handing Enrico Suave divorce papers right along with that laptop.

Are you REALLY asking strangers if you actually married a pig or not?

The answer is yes. Yes you did.


----------

