# Feeling like the other woman now



## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

After being married for 14yrs, I found out that my husband had several affairs for the past years. Even after I found out I forgave him only for him to come back and tell me that he found another woman and he was done with our marriage. He left the house and moved in with this woman. He said that he wants to start fresh with her and not cheat or lie to her. It hurst to hear him say this when he did nothing but the opposite with me.
I saw him the other day and he wanted to be intimate and said that he would only do this with me bc I'm still his wife. I was so confused that he even asked that. Now I feel like I'm the other woman because he is already lying to his girlfriend. I don't know why i even want him in my life after all the hurtful things he has done to me.
I have been nice to him through all this and put my pain to the side in hopes that he will realize that he wants to work things out. I just can't do this to myself any longer but I dont' know how to let him go for good. Any advice would be appreciated.


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## walkonmars (Aug 21, 2012)

Wow how degrading. You are resorting to being treated as one of his conquests instead of his wife. 

Why haven't you divorced?

Are you financially secure? Have kids? Family nearby for support?


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## daggeredheart (Feb 21, 2012)

Wow- should make you feel better now that you realize it's all about him and his issues and nothing to do you with. Total character defect within him. 

Dude just can't be faithful and he shouldn't ever marry. 

Here's how you let him go.....one second, minute, hour day at a time. That dog won't hunt.


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

I'm financilly secure and don't have any kids. Which you would think that it would be that much easier for me to walk away. I do have family support and friends but i'm just not seeing the whole picture well enough for me to just walk away from him. He has manipulated me all these years and I think that's part of the reason i feel this way now.


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## Thorburn (Nov 23, 2011)

Several years ago, Michelle Wiener Davis, the author of Divorce Busting, introduced a concept to the world of infidelity that is designed to help you and your partner move forward in the healing of your relationship. She suggested that any new betrayed partner implement these behaviors immediately. They aren’t designed to make you look good or your partner bad. They are, however, a means of protection for the betrayed. They also empower the betrayed to face their new world with dignity and bravery. A betrayed spouse who uses these steps will appear stronger to the wayward partner, and that is exactly what you want to portray.

This list is titled “The 180″ and it won’t take you long to figure out why. What you are actually doing is a complete 180 degree rotation in your actions and attitude. You no longer are a weeping sack of sorrow. Suddenly, you appear strong, happy, independent, and quite capable of making it on your own.

I remember when I first heard about the concept of the 180. I actually thought it was a really stupid idea. I was so codependent and wrapped up in him that it felt like the completely wrong thing to do. I thought I would be pushing him away, putting on a façade when I was asking for more honesty and openness, and making myself seem cold-hearted. Now I understand that the 180 is not about that. It’s about protecting yourself. It’s about finding yourself. It’s about enjoying who you are without the other person. It’s about not getting sucked into unnecessary drama. These are all healthy steps no matter if you ultimately stay together or go your own ways.

So here, it is without further ado:

The 180

1. Don’t pursue reason, chase, beg, plead or implore.

2. No frequent phone calls.

3. Don’t point out “good points” in marriage.

4. Don’t follow her/him around the house.

5. Don’t encourage or initiate discussion about the future.

6. Don’t ask for help from the family members of your wayward partner.

7. Don’t ask for reassurances.

8. Don’t buy or give gifts.

9. Don’t schedule dates together.

10. Don’t keep saying, “I Love You!” Because if you really think about it, he/she is, at this particular moment, not very loveable.

11. Do more than act as if you are moving on with your life; begin moving on with your life!

12. Be cheerful, strong, outgoing and independent.

13. Don’t sit around waiting on your spouse – get busy, do things, go out with friends, enjoy old hobbies, find new ones! But stay busy!

14. When home with your spouse, (if you usually start the conversation) be scarce or short on words. Don’t push any issue, no matter how much you want to!

15. If you’re in the habit of asking your spouse his/her whereabouts, ASK NOTHING. Seem totally uninterested.

16. Your partner needs to believe that you have awakened to the fact that “they (the wayward partner)” are serious concerning their assertions as to the future (or lack there of) of your marriage. Thus, you are you are moving on with your life…without them!

17. Don’t be nasty, angry or even cold – Just pull yourself back. Don’t always be so available…for anything! Your spouse will notice. More important, he/she will notice that you’re missing.

18. No matter what you are feeling TODAY, only show your spouse happiness and contentment. Make yourself be someone they would want to be around, not a moody, needy, pathetic individual but a self-assured individual secure in the knowledge that they have value.

19. All questions about the marriage should be put on hold, until your spouse wants to talk about it (which may not be for quite a while). Initiate no such conversation!

20. Do not allow yourself to lose your temper. No yelling, screaming or name calling EVER. No show of temper! Be cool, act cool; be in control of the only thing you can control. YOURSELF!

21. Don’t be overly enthusiastic.

22. Do not argue when they tell you how they feel (it only makes their feelings stronger). In fact, refuse to argue at all!

23. Be patient and learn to not only listen carefully to what your spouse is really saying to you. Hear what it is that they are saying! Listen and then listen some more!

24. Learn to back off, keep your mouth shut and walk away when you want to speak out, no matter what the provocation. No one ever got themselves into trouble by just not saying anything.

25. Take care of you. Exercise, sleep, laugh & focus on all the other parts of your life that are not in turmoil.

26. Be strong, confident and learn to speak softly.

27. Know that if you can do this 180, your smallest CONSISTENT action will be noticed far more than any words you can say or write.

28. Do not be openly desperate or needy even when you are hurting more than ever and are feeling totally desperate and needy.

29. Do not focus on yourself when communicating with your spouse. It’s not always about you! More to the point, at present they just don’t care.

30. Do not believe any of what you hear them say and less than 50% of what you see. Your spouse will speak in absolute negatives and do so in the most strident tones imaginable. Try to remember that they are also hurting and afraid. Try to remember that they know what they are doing is wrong and so they will say anything they can to justify their behavior.

31. Do not give up no matter how dark it is or how bad you feel. It “ain’t over till it’s over!”

32. Do not backslide from your hard-earned changes. Remain consistent! It is the consistency of action and attitude that delivers the message.

33. When expressing your dissatisfaction with the actions of the wayward party, never be judgmental, critical or express moral outrage. Always explain that your dissatisfaction is due to the pain that the acts being committed are causing you as a person. This is the kind of behavior that will cause you to be a much more attractive and mysterious individual. Further it SHOWS that you are NOT afraid to move on with your life. Still more important, it will burst their positive little bubble; the one in which they believe that they can always come back to you in case things don’t work out with the affair partner.


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

Stop being so nice to him and for GAWDS sake don't sleep with him!!!! 

And tell this new woman in his life what he did. 

Your husband is a scumbag and you need to start treating him like one. Live up to your username.

Oh, and get tested for STD's stat.


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

Yes he is just something else. He acts like nothing has happened and wants to be friends and tell me about his relationship now. 
I wish I could be easy and let him go for good.


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## walkonmars (Aug 21, 2012)

Courageous said:


> Yes he is just something else. He acts like nothing has happened and wants to be friends and tell me about his relationship now..


Puke!

Of all the nerve. Tell him to tell Dear Abby. Better yet, tell him to pound sand.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

CheaterVille :: Don't Be the Last to Know for both of them.


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## SaltInWound (Jan 2, 2013)

Courageous said:


> He said that he wants to start fresh with her and *not cheat* or lie to her.
> 
> I saw him the other day and *he wanted to be intimate *and said that he would only do this with me bc I'm still his wife.


:liar::loser:


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Courageous said:


> After being married for 14yrs, I found out that my husband had several affairs for the past years. Even after I found out I forgave him only for him to come back and tell me that he found another woman and he was done with our marriage. He left the house and moved in with this woman. He said that he wants to start fresh with her and not cheat or lie to her. It hurst to hear him say this when he did nothing but the opposite with me.


He's doing the same thing with his girlfriend... ..


Courageous said:


> I saw him the other day and he wanted to be intimate and said that he would only do this with me bc I'm still his wife. ...


See that, he's lying to her and cheating on her. He's treating her just like he treated you.

Have you been having sex with him?

Do the 180. Go dark on him. And then file for divorce.


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

No, I have not been having sex with him. I will check out the 180 because i really need to do this for myself. 

He has been manipulating me for the past 15 yrs and it's going to take a lot of work to get out of it.


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## ArmyofJuan (Dec 29, 2010)

Courageous said:


> I have been nice to him through all this and put my pain to the side in hopes that he will realize that he wants to work things out. I just can't do this to myself any longer but I dont' know how to let him go for good. Any advice would be appreciated.


This is your problem, this is enabling behavior. You are basically condoning his cheating by being nice to him.

Your H is a POS serial cheater and will go to his grave cheating on whoever he is with at the time. You just need to stop talking to him, nothing good will ever come of it.

FYI most men are not like him so go looking (but avoid men that act like your H).


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## Insanity (Oct 28, 2013)

Courageous said:


> Yes he is just something else. *He acts like nothing has happened and wants to be friends and tell me about his relationship now. *
> I wish I could be easy and let him go for good.


Speechless. Just speechless. He's mental.


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## phillybeffandswiss (Jan 20, 2013)

People think being mean is a bad thing. There are degrees of being mean. Simply saying "no" is mean to people. Don't engage him and don't be nice. You forgave him, which is a GIFT, then he threw it in the trash. So, put the "nice" right alongside that trashed gift.


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## calmwinds (Dec 10, 2012)

So, he wants YOU to be his new bootie call girl? Puhleeease! I hope you told his new GF what a skeezebucket he is!


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

Yes, basically that's what he wants. He usually calls or emails when he is not around her. 
No I have not told his girlfriend anything. She will soon find out the type of man he is. He has told her that he was just tired of lying and cheating and that he is a complete changed man and will not do that to her. When they met, she knew he was married and were together a few months before he even told me. 
He even told me that he was going to be faithful to her and be the type of man that I always wanted.


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## walkonmars (Aug 21, 2012)

Courageous said:


> He even told me that he was going to be faithful to her and be the type of man that I always wanted.


WTF, was he high? Jeezus how do you keep from barfing or clobbering him?


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Courageous said:


> He left the house and moved in with this woman. He said that he wants to start fresh with her and not cheat or lie to her.
> 
> 
> I saw him the other day and he wanted to be intimate and said that he would only do this with me bc I'm still his wife


I would have laughed in his face like *HAHAHAHAHA. Go back to your mistress.*


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Courageous said:


> Yes, basically that's what he wants. He usually calls or emails when he is not around her.
> No I have not told his girlfriend anything. She will soon find out the type of man he is. He has told her that he was just tired of lying and cheating and that he is a complete changed man and will not do that to her. When they met, she knew he was married and were together a few months before he even told me.
> He even told me that he was going to be faithful to her and be the type of man that I always wanted.


He is a dumba$$


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

ArmyofJuan said:


> This is your problem, this is enabling behavior. You are basically condoning his cheating by being nice to him.


:iagree::iagree:


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## badmemory (Jul 31, 2012)

Courageous said:


> he wanted to be intimate and said that he would only do this with me bc I'm still his wife.


That's his idea of integrity? He cheats on you, leaves you for the OW, and then wants to cheat on the OW with you. But because he's a man of principle, he would only do that because he's still married to you. Laughable.

You need to drop this loser like a bad habit.


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## missthelove2013 (Sep 23, 2013)

ugh there is NO reason to keep this person in your life...you make your own coin, and you have no kids as you said

divorce him and cut off all contact...easier said than done I know...but this dude is just poison...what if you find a good guy and start dating him, do you want to slip up and cheat with your ex hubby??? and kill the new relationship??? ugh...move on and move on quick...have him served

and dont bother telling the girlfriend...she screwed a married man, I hardly think she cares and IF SHE DOES, she isnt worth the heads up...let HER marry this jerk and THEN get hurt, like you [email protected]


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## Acabado (May 13, 2012)

Tape him, save all his emails and texts, his booty calls then forward them to OW.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Courageous said:


> No, I have not been having sex with him. I will check out the 180 because i really need to do this for myself.
> 
> He has been manipulating me for the past 15 yrs and it's going to take a lot of work to get out of it.


Good, for you I'm glad that you have not given into his ridiculous proposal.

In case you did not notice, there is a link to the 180 in my signature block below.


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

I'm so glad that I found this forum. You guys have helped me a lot with your comments and advice. 

I should send all his text/emails to the OW


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## walkonmars (Aug 21, 2012)

Y'know he's such an idiot. 

If you have a friend (preferably one with a hard to understand voice or one who can feign a thick foreign accent) have them make a 30 second tape for you that you can play for stbxh next time you see his number on caller id. 

script:

Press 1 if you wish to speak to 'courageous'

press 2 if you wish to leave a voice mail

press 3 if you want to make a request

press 4 if you need information

press 5 if you want to hear the menu again

sorry your call cannot be completed .....ever


(seriously - don't even answer his calls - the 180 is a great idea as is a new phone number)


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Courageous said:


> Yes he is just something else. He acts like nothing has happened and wants to be friends and tell me about his relationship now.
> I wish I could be easy and let him go for good.


That's because he knows you're easy.

You tried to nice him back home, which is BS for "I'll do ANYTHING if you'll just take me back." Unattractive much?

You wanna know the BEST way to get him back - though I can't imagine why you'd accept a full-blown serial cheater who treats you like a sex object and nothing else? To tell him to go to hell and hand him divorce papers. THEN, then, you'll look attractive to him.


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

After reading all your comments it is clear that I must cut off all contact with him. He doesn't deserve my friendship or to even be part of my life.


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## SaltInWound (Jan 2, 2013)

Courageous said:


> He even told me that he was going to be faithful to her and be the type of man that I always wanted.


My stbxh said something similar to our son in reference to being a father to his wh0re's son. People who say things like this are sadistic. They need to emotionally destroy people. They treat everyone close to them like sh1t. That is not good enough. They have to find a way to have a lasting effect, so the only way to do that is to tell you they will give the next person everything you always wanted from them. Perfect, because they know that leaves their victims wondering why they are not good enough for this person to just change for them, rather than for someone else. They most important thing is for the victim to see through the psychological snow storm. These people don't change for anyone. They use, abuse, and discard.


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## RWB (Feb 6, 2010)

Courageous said:


> I have been nice to him through all this and put my pain to the side in hopes that he will realize that he wants to work things out. I just can't do this to myself any longer but* I dont' know how to let him go for good. Any advice would be appreciated.*


C,

It's called *Divorce Proceedings in your County Superior Court.*

Don't get me wrong, I'm all about R when both parties are honestly and firmly wanting to recommit. Your H shown nothing to earn your forgiveness.


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## ne9907 (Jul 17, 2013)

> They have to find a way to have a lasting effect, so the only way to do that is to tell you they will give the next person everything you always wanted from them. Perfect, because they know that leaves their victims wondering why they are not good enough for this person to just change for them, rather than for someone else. They most important thing is for the victim to see through the psychological snow storm. These people don't change for anyone. They use, abuse, and discard.


:iagree::iagree:


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

@SaltInWound
that is so true when he told me that i felt as if I good enough for him to try to give me his best. Instead he does this to someone he just met.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Your husband is a vat of Penguin regurgitant!


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

Thats a good one MattMatt!!


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## alte Dame (Aug 7, 2012)

Courageous said:


> @SaltInWound
> that is so true when he told me that i felt as if I good enough for him to try to give me his best. Instead he does this to someone he just met.


Yes, and he is giving her his best - he is already lying and cheating.

You should take the advice of sending on his e-mails, texts, etc. to his new love. Don't feel like second best. He's giving her just what he gave you.

He's a real creep. I'm sorry that it took so long for you to find out.


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

I felt that there was something not quite right, but it was just my instincts because I didn't have real proof. Looking back, I should had followed them. I was right all the time but he made me feel that I would think things like that out of insecurity. He would always turn it back on me.


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

Yes, it does hurt that he did all these things but I guess it is better that it happen now than 10 more years down the road.
What gets me is that he wasn't man enough to leave years ago when he felt the need to be looking somewhere else. He had to wait until he did all the damage, start a relationship with someone else and then drop the bomb on me.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Well he is finally leaving. It's truly a blessing for you since he is not worthy of your love.

He is going to end up alone as he is cheating on this woman already.

Have you sent her all the emails yet to let her know what he's telling you behind her back?


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

No, I have not sent them to her yet. I'm still contemplating if I should do it or not. 
I kind of want to but I know if I do send them she will not do anything about it. He will use his manipulative ways to convince her and come up with excuses. So I'm not sure I want to get entangled with all that. She is not much different than him because she knew he was married & she was married too. She left her husband to be with him. So they are both cheaters.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Courageous said:


> No, I have not sent them to her yet. I'm still contemplating if I should do it or not.
> I kind of want to but I know if I do send them she will not do anything about it. He will use his manipulative ways to convince her and come up with excuses. So I'm not sure I want to get entangled with all that. She is not much different than him because she knew he was married & she was married too. She left her husband to be with him. So they are both cheaters.


My take on it would be to let her decide what to do with them. If she choses to ignore them, that's her business. But it puts him on notice that you will not be party to his being a liar and a game player. I would do it for me... so that I was not part of the game.


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

That's true EleGirl, I think I'm going to do it and see what happens.


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Courageous said:


> I was right all the time but he made me feel that I would think things like that out of insecurity. He would always turn it back on me.


That's called gaslighting.

Gaslighting is a form of mental abuse in which false information is presented with the intent of making a victim doubt his or her own memory, perception and sanity.[1] Instances may range simply from the denial by an abuser that previous abusive incidents ever occurred, up to the staging of bizarre events by the abuser with the intention of disorienting the victim.
Gaslighting - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Courageous said:


> No, I have not sent them to her yet. I'm still contemplating if I should do it or not.
> I kind of want to but I know if I do send them she will not do anything about it. He will use his manipulative ways to convince her and come up with excuses.


Or she might be strong enough to kick him out for it.


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## mtpromises (May 27, 2013)

You're being way too nice to your soon to be ex. It's time to cut him completely off. Individual counseling did wonders for me and gave me the strength to let go of an unhealthy marriage. Good luck to you.


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

That's my next step to get a good therapist to help me get out of this mind frame.


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

Today has started good. I don't feel down and I hope to make a councious effort to keep this attitude throughout the day. It is hard, it has only been 3 months an I know this is not going to go away quickly. He is still trying to contact me therefore making it harder for me because i know he just wants to be around but does not want to get back together.


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## alte Dame (Aug 7, 2012)

You sound like a very kind-hearted person and he is probably drawn to that no matter what he has done to you. There are lots and lots of loyal men who would love to meet a nice woman like you. Keep telling yourself that you deserve good things. It's true. The more you start believing it, the easier it will be to leave him in your past, which is where he deserves to be. He only cares about what you give to him. He doesn't care that he hurts you. You don't deserve that.


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

Thank you Alte Dame for your kind words. It is so nice to get some encouragement from others. I find it very helpful in the healing process

_Posted via *Topify* using iPhone/iPad_


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

Thank you!!



alte Dame said:


> You sound like a very kind-hearted person and he is probably drawn to that no matter what he has done to you. There are lots and lots of loyal men who would love to meet a nice woman like you. Keep telling yourself that you deserve good things. It's true. The more you start believing it, the easier it will be to leave him in your past, which is where he deserves to be. He only cares about what you give to him. He doesn't care that he hurts you. You don't deserve that.


 _Posted via *Topify* using iPhone/iPad_


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

It has been about 3 months since we have separated and about 3days since I cut off contact with him. Only 3 days and I want to talk to him so bad. I'm hurting so much. I don't want to give in because I will just be prolonging the healing process.


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## phillybeffandswiss (Jan 20, 2013)

You aren't the only one that has had this problem, even if the other person did you wrong. No, it will help you if you keep to zero contact.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

It will get easier with each day. Just keep taking care of yourself.


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

Thank you guys, I will be strong and will get out of this one way or another. He will not see me defeated because I'm much better than that.


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## LongWalk (Apr 4, 2013)

What you write is beautiful. He was unworthy of you. Everytime you think of contacting him, imagine him scrolling through an online dating site, fantasizing over the women's faces. Then imagine that one day he wants to look at your picture and cannot find one anywhere. Make certain that you cease to sooth and reassure his cheating heart.

Are you going to a gym, pool or jogging trail? Get high on working out.


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## KeepingUpAppearances (Jul 14, 2013)

In my opinion he can't be changed. You seem to be waiting around for him to get an epiphany and realize how important you are, but he will not. His past and current behavior prove it. He can't be faithful to anyone. You need to pick yourself up and move forward. You deserve better. Don't settle just because you have a 14 year investment in the relationship.

Sorry about you situation, I hope you find the strength to put yourself first from now on.


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

You're doing great. If you feel weak, just come here and we'll talk you down.


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

I really needed to hear from you all and your encouraging comments. I keep on thinking about the past and all the years invested and that just drags me down.


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## alte Dame (Aug 7, 2012)

Try to counter your thoughts about the years you've invested with some thoughts about your future. Your WH is a liar and a cheater & that's not going to magically change. That would be your future with him. I'm sure that's not the future that you want. Try to keep telling yourself that you won't have that kind of future for yourself.


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

Yes, most definitely that is not the kind of future I want and I think that's all he has to offer.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

I agree, you need to start thinking forward, about your future.

What are your plans now?


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

since I'm keeping the house, I was planning to stay there. However, now I'm thinking about renting it out or selling it and just moving to another place closer to my job. I was going to wait for him to file for divorce because I didn't have to spend the money to do it when he is the one who should pay for it. 
But maybe I should do it to get this over with and fork out the money for the attorney.


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Renting out is a great idea. Especially if you end up with extra money each month. Start becoming a real estate investor, one house at a time.


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## alte Dame (Aug 7, 2012)

Courageous said:


> since I'm keeping the house, I was planning to stay there. However, now I'm thinking about renting it out or selling it and just moving to another place closer to my job. I was going to wait for him to file for divorce because I didn't have to spend the money to do it when he is the one who should pay for it.
> But maybe I should do it to get this over with and fork out the money for the attorney.


Yes, a fresh start, on your terms, on your schedule. This sounds like a good way to begin. Forward focus.


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## LongWalk (Apr 4, 2013)

Come to TAM when you are down. We are IRL people, perhaps we cannot drink coffee in the same room with you but you will find warm people here. Turnera and I are pals, for instance.

It sounds as if you have lived in your husband's shadow to some degree, perhaps because he is selfish and have put needs first. One of needs has been for sex and affirmation from other women. It is horrible to think of how he cheated you of affection and emotional warmth so that he could get it somewhere else from some floozy, probably.

If her were any sort of decent guy who loved you, he would living in a tent in your front yard, begging to sleep in the garage.

Don't forget to get to the gym so that you gain physical self confidence. You don't feel ready to date yet, but start working on yourself. Just from what you have written, I think you have a lot going for you.


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

Thank you LongWalk. You know, I'm amazed at how people that has never met me before can pick up on things about my relationship based on what I write. 
You are so right, I always felt that I was living in my husband's shadow. It was always about him and what he wanted. I always did everything he wanted because I thought this was going to make our marriage strong but it didn't.

_Posted via *Topify* using iPhone/iPad_


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

Why do I keep on obsessing about him when I know that he is so toxic? 
Why do we do this to ourselves? 
Why can't I see that I'm meant for is much more than what he ever gave me or will ever try to. Ughhhh

_Posted via *Topify* using iPhone/iPad_


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

MissFroggie thank you for answering those questions. Your answers were so insightful. I deeply appreciate the time you took to reply to my questions. Thank you! Thank you all for all your support.


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## ne9907 (Jul 17, 2013)

We are all here for you.


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

Thank you ne9907


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## jnj express (Mar 28, 2011)

For some reason he has you mesmerized, and you seem willing to put up with all his sh*t and come back for more

Turn this around and pretend it was a friend of yours---telling you this story, with her playing your part---WHAT WOULD YOU TELL HER

You may not be doing what is best for you, cuz you are scared of going into the big bad world on your own---but believe me it will be fine, and you will meet someone who will be true to you, and you only---there are lots and lots and lots of good men out there----YOU NEED TO RID YOURSELF OF THIS POS THAT CALLS HIMSELF A H.

You need to go DARK on him, file for D, and stay away from him---right now, he still thinks you are at his beck and call---that MUST END LIKE YESTERDAY---IE: DELETE HIM


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

You are so right jnj express. I have and continue to put up with all his crap and he knows that. I must end it now because he just wants to drag me with all his bs.


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

C, you deserve a lot more than him. There are plenty of men out there who want to cherish and love and respect a woman. Get THAT.


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## Courageous (Oct 30, 2013)

good morning TAM family!
I need some encouragement this morning. I'm feeling a bit down and I need to get out of this mood.


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Go do some exercising.


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