# He Is Finally Getting the Help he Needs



## 5tolife (Jan 16, 2012)

My husband went to the hospital thinking he was having a heart attack, thankfully it was not. He was having an anxiety attack. The doctors thought it was be a good idea to check himself in and get treatment for PPD/Bipolar/Scizophernia. He is now in the best place for him right now, getting the help he needs. It was very scary watching him fall apart when he realized what he was doing. 

It is very weird to not have him at home, the tone in his voice when I talk to him on the phone is so different he sounds relaxed and calm. He is still very confused on what is going on with him, but the doctors have figured out he has been suffering for almost 15 years. His psycotic break was within the last year. 

I am trying so hard to be ok, for my kids and family because no one knows. He has asked me to not tell anyone, he wants to tell them on his terms when the meds kick in, and when he execpts the illness. 

I truley hope he gets better, I love him and he doesn't understand that right now, I hope he will eventually understand that I have stuck around because I love him, not to harm him. 

I am fighting back tears minute to minute and especially when I look at my 2 kids, my heart is breaking for them. I have to put on my parent mask, and show that everything is going to be fine, when I don't even know. I am very nervous for when he does come home, what is he goona be like, what happens if I trigger him, what if he gets iratated, what if he is completely out of it and misses things that he wants to be there for. 

I just want my husband back home, I want to be able to hold him and hug him, I want to be able to hear him snoring at night.


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

How old is your husband? Schizophrenia usually hits a person in their late teens/early 20's. 

I feel for you going through this. I have a nephew who is paranoid schizophrenic. I took care of him for a year. He had a very bad break down last summer. AFter months in a hospital he's back at his mother's home. I doubt he will ever be alright. 

If your husband cannot work after this, make sure to put in for SSI and Social Security Disability as soon as possible. 

You need a lot of support right now. Isn't there one family member or friend that you can confide in?


----------



## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

My foster father went through a similar issue about 20 years ago and I heard he is doing fine now. Has a stable life and marriage. While not the most pleasant thing to have revealed to you, it must be reassuring that there is a biological basis for the turmoil. Love is very powerful. It's so much easier to understand that neurochemistry. And I think it is most definitely a trump card. Your H is so lucky to have you. Take things at his pace. Being in the hospital is as much a surreal experience as anything else, and given your H's state of mind, even more so. Don't forget to take care of yourself. You might want to connect with NAMI, they offer all kinds of support for families. Hopefully you will also have a case manager but resources tend to be stretched thin after the initial discharge planning, so you will want to bootstrap a bit and try to dovetail your own efforts with what's offered officially. NAMI has programs for children, including how to explain to them. Really, kids already know there is something wrong. I really wish my parents, both of them, had been more forthright in identifying their illness and how it was managed and what I could expect. My foster father did a great job of it, so that was nice. I remember visiting him in the psych hospital when I was home on leave (I'd moved out by the time it blew open, but was aware of a lot of issues because he had confided in me.) Nobody else was brave enough to visit him...but for me it was kind of a relief, someone who could be honest about his condition. I was really impressed at how much effort he put into his hospital stay and the kind of routine and rules and such he had to adjust to, in order to get treatment. He is really my kind of hero.


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Homemaker_Numero_Uno is right about resources. They are not only streched thin but not made readily available.

I found that many case workers do not follow through, do not really help their clients. With my nephew we have found that his primary care taker has to go to every one of his appointments as not only does he not always understand what is going on but the docs, case workers, etc do not follow though if only he goes.

Your husband is lucky to have such a caring wife. Since it seems that your husband understands that he does have a mental illness, if he takes his meds and does what he needs to you can both get through this.


----------

