# Advice On Fiancee's Obession



## Taurus94 (Dec 20, 2013)

Hello, I came here to get some advice on how to handle my fiancée's obsession with anything to do with serial killers. Both real and fictional.


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## 6301 (May 11, 2013)

Yeah. Move on and quick. Be a whole different story if she was into growing big tomatoes or something harmless but this sounds like one of those people that want to marry a mass murderer whose in jail for life. Move on and find someone normal because this aint.


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## BashfulB (Jul 1, 2013)

Well that is weird. But have you asked her why? Criminal science is pretty fascinating. 

I for one am big on the Italian mafia. I got interested reading the Godfather trilogy by Puzo, and since then I've read a few more books on the subject. While I do not admire the criminality and the horrible things these organizations have done, I am fascinated with how they have existed and thrived despite the pressures of law enforcement and negative publicity. 

Maybe your fiancée is interested in the psychology of serial killers and not so much the killing. Are we to say that someone should not marry an FBI profiler? To become a good profiler you have to have some fascination with those you are profiling.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Taurus94 (Dec 20, 2013)

First to 6301, I just want to say that I just don't think I could just move on and find someone else, because I love her too much to do that.
Second to Bashfulbull, I have tried to ask her about this. But whenever I try to ask her about this she just gets angry at me and just refuse to tell me anything about this beyond it's just a hobby. Then she stops talking to me for a few hours. so I don't really know if she interested in the psychology of serial killers, or the killings. But I'm going to guess it's the killings since last I checked she still wants to become a hairdresser not a profiler or anything like that.
Lastly, I just want to thank you both for your reply's.


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## Sandfly (Dec 8, 2013)

I had a GF who was into serial killers.

She was mad on anything brutally gruesome. She started collecting books and articles on Jack the Ripper. Her favourite film was natural born killers, and after that 'Monster', then films like the final destinations, screams etc, which we both thought of as comedies.

But it was OK. I was into serial killers too. And I loved those films. Common interests.

As long as you are the more vicious of the two, she'll respect you and look up to you and love you. 

At some point, and more than once, she will attack you unexpectedly (experience talking). At that point you'll have to respond with violence - 'just enough but convincingly more' is best. She'll be turned on by that, and her love will grow. 

If you're a typical nice person, who wants a normal woman, then get away now. Don't try and pretend to be someone you're not in any case.

Mind you, who says every serial killer fanatic has to be the same.

Good luck :smthumbup:


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## scatty (Mar 15, 2013)

I, myself, find all human nature fascinating, and my favorite network is Investigation ID. I think more of it in a forensics kind of way. If she sleeps with a knife under her pillow, though, you may want to re-think the relationship.


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## Kaboom (Feb 6, 2013)

I can't pretend to be understanding. My wife also loves horror, but not the horror movies I could enjoy.. I appreciate horror-suspense, and even the 80's stuff where the blood and stuff was so obviously fake.. but the newer stuff always combines extreme gore and utterly horrible and traumatic deaths.. to the point that it really bothers me to even watch it. Films like the new chainsaw massacre, saw (any of them), hostel, hills have eyes, etc.. they are beyond gruesome, and I agree with a lot of people who call them "horror-porn". 

The level of excitement that people show over these types of movies is really disturbing. I see the same kind of excitement in the law and order SVU and other shows like it.. people are so fascinated and excited over what I consider to be the most psychotic and disturbing crimes a person could commit.

How is it they can claim watching too much porn is psychologically bad for you and makes you a sexual deviant, yet all this horror-porn has no effect on someone's psyche? 

I appreciate freedom and art, but this stuff in my opinion takes both way too far.

In response to the OP, I'd recommend running away. The type of personality that obsesses over that stuff cannot possibly be a good thing in the long-term. And one day you might find yourself being tied to a chair and tortured......


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## SlowlyGettingWiser (Apr 7, 2012)

Taurus94 said:


> Hello, I came here to get some advice on how to handle my fiancée's obsession with anything to do with serial killers. Both real and fictional.


I guess I want to know *how* she is obsessed?

Pen-pal with prisoners?
Buys collectibles from internet?
Reads about them?
Talks about them excessively?
Wants to visit their crime scenes?

I mean just *how* obsessed are we talking here. With no more info than your original post, it's hard to give advice because I don't understand WHAT EXACTLY the problem is or might be?


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## doubletrouble (Apr 23, 2013)

We love the crime shows. Murder mysteries. Real life stories. Serial killers are part of it. We're into the mind, what makes it tick, how people can think and act the way they do. It's abhorrent. 

Does she admire these people? That would be a red flag. 
Does she rewind and re-play gruesome crime scenes? Flag. 
Does she talk about killing methods ad nauseum? Red flag. 

Is she interested in crime science? Thumbs up.
Is she interested in the psychology of murder. That's OK. 

See what I'm getting at? It's not bad. Hell, when I was a kid I was totally engrossed with WWII. Both theatres, both sides of the war. Torture, mass killings, military strategy, and especially the air wars. Naval battles were fascinating too. Weird though, I never joined the military. I'm not a cop. And so far as I know, I've never killed anyone. So it's not necessarily scary. Obviously you're concerned about it, so maybe that's enough of a red flag for you. But you say you love her, so try to understand her. 

Come to think of it, I never watched near as many crime shows before W and I got together. I've learned to appreciate them, and be interested in them for the same reasons she is. Maybe you can do the same thing.


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

To what level? Does she contact real serial killers in prison or does she just read all she can about them?


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## john117 (May 20, 2013)

Go by fiance's actions and the degree they interfere with regular activities. If they do you have a problem. If not, it's just a hobby.

Also pay attention to how often related topics come up in conversation. I could talk photography for days unchecked but this is a mainstream subject.


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