# I just want us happy



## Fudgiecola (Mar 2, 2021)

How do I keep him happy? He says I don’t talk to him and I’m more focused on family n friends. He does most of the cleaning except I do the bathrooms n take the trash in. He cooks every night n I don’t. I’m not a motivated female n he’s a very motivated men. I do really want to be with him. He always make excuses for me like my parent didn’t teach me life principles and values. By the way, my parents are very cuddle n wants to be their kids friends not discipliners. I find my self very lucky for my parents. He’s always telling me to cut out friends. I just wanna know how I can live my life with him as well as make him happy? He’s really extraordinary. Thanks 🙏


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## Luckylucky (Dec 11, 2020)

Sure, you should have family and friends, but marriage is marriage right? Give him some time.

You could do a bit of housework, and he’s probably right, your parents treated you like a Princess and could have pulled you up here and there. Parents aren’t really supposed to be friends, cuddling and fun is nice, but real life is a bit gritty and boring and hard sometimes. They failed, you it appears 😏


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## Fudgiecola (Mar 2, 2021)

Luckylucky said:


> Sure, you should have family and friends, but marriage is marriage right? Give him some time.
> 
> You could do a bit of housework, and he’s probably right, your parents treated you like a Princess and could have pulled you up here and there. Parents aren’t really supposed to be friends, cuddling and fun is nice, but real life is a bit gritty and boring and hard sometimes. They failed, you it appears 😏


honestly, I know it’s my fault not my parents for some of my siblings are neat freaks who cook. Also my partner is very clean and organized. I love that about him and his take charge professional attitude that cares about the planet. We are not married we’ve just been together for a long time


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## Casual Observer (Sep 13, 2012)

Fudgiecola said:


> honestly, I know it’s my fault not my parents for some of my siblings are neat freaks who cook. Also my partner is very clean and organized. I love that about him and his take charge professional attitude that cares about the planet. We are not married we’ve just been together for a long time


How long have you been with him? Do you have substantive conversations about news, politics, whatever? Or do you have your world and he has his? Are you "scared" to talk with him, thinking that he might disagree with you and you'd "lose?" My wife thinks she gets her way by not having conversations. She doesn't believe in compromise being a thing. Just winning & losing. We're working on that, and she's getting better, and I'm getting better at drawing her into a conversation, making her realize I'm interested in what she has to say, and that it's ok to disagree. It's not an easy thing for some.


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## frusdil (Sep 5, 2013)

Nothing wrong with him cooking or doing most of the cleaning if that's what works for you two. Is he feeling he does too much and you not enough? 

You may just not be compatible. If you know he wants to spend more time with him and be more affectionate, and you love him, why aren't you trying to do more of those things?

Can you expand on him asking you to cut friends out? I'm not sure whether that's a red flag yet...need more context.


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## Fudgiecola (Mar 2, 2021)

Casual Observer said:


> How long have you been with him? Do you have substantive conversations about news, politics, whatever? Or do you have your world and he has his? Are you "scared" to talk with him, thinking that he might disagree with you and you'd "lose?" My wife thinks she gets her way by not having conversations. She doesn't believe in compromise being a thing. Just winning & losing. We're working on that, and she's getting better, and I'm getting better at drawing her into a conversation, making her realize I'm interested in what she has to say, and that it's ok to disagree. It's not an easy thing for some.


My lovely and I have been together for five years. He has been my longest relationship and I’m happy to have him. I always seem to upset him though. He says I don’t talk to him like all day when I feel like I have.

I’m glad that u n ur wife are working on better relationship together.

we don’t talk politics because I’m not into politics but I still vote. We play music a lot like he plays guitar, piano also drums and I sing and write lyrics... it’s just a hobby. We have a lot of fun when we do that. He something else. I wouldn’t leave him if I tried and I dunno if he would leave me....he doesn’t say he would yet I feel like he’s out of my league to be honest. He really is extraordinary yet again


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