# HD men



## lookinforhelpandhope (Apr 10, 2013)

How much/often do you need sex to feel like your needs are being met?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## larry.gray (Feb 21, 2011)

Daily would be preferred. Every other day would be OK. Any less than every 3rd would be unacceptable.


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## Rooster2014 (Aug 23, 2014)

lookinforhelpandhope said:


> How much/often do you need sex to feel like your needs are being met?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_



Funny you asked. For me I could go every other day. But by the third day without a release I'm edgy and grumpy. My wife asked me if that's normal for men to get that way? I have heard others say the same. She try's to keep me happy before that point.


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## Redheadguy (Jul 30, 2014)

larry.gray said:


> Daily would be preferred. Every other day would be OK. Any less than every 3rd would be unacceptable.


Same here.


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## Shoto1984 (Apr 11, 2009)

Ditto


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## lookinforhelpandhope (Apr 10, 2013)

Thanks for the responses. 

Just reflecting on the past. STBX never seemed content with the amount of sex he was getting. Usually once per day, sometimes more, with few exceptions. Yet it felt like he was constantly asking for more and more and would be very disgruntled when I said no.


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## Vorlon (Sep 13, 2012)

Funny I didn't think of myself as especially HD but I'm right in-line with the other guys and I'm 50 plus. 

But I also don't let it get out of hand (Pun intended) after about 3-4 days. I get resentful and distracted after that length of time and it isn't always her fault (Life gets in the way) so I take care of things before it get to that. Then the clock restarts.


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## Jetranger (May 31, 2013)

larry.gray said:


> Daily would be preferred. Every other day would be OK. Any less than every 3rd would be unacceptable.


Ditto. More than once per day would be great!



Vorlon said:


> But I also don't let it get out of hand (Pun intended) after about 3-4 days. I get resentful and distracted after that length of time and it isn't always her fault (Life gets in the way) so I take care of things before it get to that. Then the clock restarts.


This is also true. If I have to go without for more than a day or two, I start to get anxious, distracted and irritable, and have to get things taken care of one way or another.


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

Every other day or a minimum of three times a week would be okay, but ideally I prefer daily and occasionally two or three times when life provides sufficient leisure. For the past 14 years it has averaged at least daily and often more.


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## 4x4 (Apr 15, 2014)

My wife can't push my limit to be certain, but my ideal would be around once a day average or a little more. That may mean 3-5 times one day and none for 3-5 days, not that it HAS to be EVERY day.

I'm in my early 40s.


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## thatbpguy (Dec 24, 2012)

lookinforhelpandhope said:


> How much/often do you need sex to feel like your needs are being met?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


At 57, 3X week. Yeah, I'm good with this.


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

lookinforhelpandhope said:


> How much/often do you need sex to feel like your needs are being met?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_



Whenever I want. However I want.


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## Holland (Aug 20, 2012)

FWIW I am female and also get very irritated by day 3. God only knows how I didn't kill anyone when I was in a sexless marriage. 

To answer on Mr Hs behalf he needs, wants, likes daily or more sex. He is in his 50's and always been HD.
The few times a year when we cannot be together due to work then we have phone sex which is something that I really enjoy.

But OP if your ex was having daily sex and still not happy then that is on him. Everyone should feel safe to say no especially when there is plenty of sex going on. That is something you should not have to tolerate. If he was getting disgruntled then he has an issue, I am guessing there was not much respect in the relationship.


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## lookinforhelpandhope (Apr 10, 2013)

Holland said:


> FWIW I am female and also get very irritated by day 3. God only knows how I didn't kill anyone when I was in a sexless marriage.
> 
> To answer on Mr Hs behalf he needs, wants, likes daily or more sex. He is in his 50's and always been HD.
> The few times a year when we cannot be together due to work then we have phone sex which is something that I really enjoy.
> ...


Thanks Holland.

And you're right on the money. There was a huge lack of respect in the relationship, amoung other issues.


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## Healer (Jun 5, 2013)

I'm HD and was only getting maybe once a week when I was with my stbxw. Let's just say I was resentful a lot.

The woman I'm "seeing" now is super HD. We go a couple times a night (when we're together) and then in the morning. We both love the fact the other is HD.


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## homedepot (May 13, 2014)

Not trying to be an ALPHA but twice daily would keep me happy. Or 3 times a week and a whole sat to make up for time lost would due.


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## See_Listen_Love (Jun 28, 2012)

Married but Happy said:


> Every other day or a minimum of three times a week would be okay, but ideally I prefer daily and occasionally two or three times when life provides sufficient leisure. For the past 14 years it has averaged at least daily and often more.


I consider myself HD, but I cannot understand how you do this logistically, life is busy, we get tired, we have lots of obligations, wife needs more sleep than I.

Since we take our time for having boudoir type of sex, it is each other day as a standard. The other night is for getting an hour extra sleep.


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## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

See_Listen_Love said:


> I consider myself HD, but I cannot understand how you do this logistically, life is busy, we get tired, we have lots of obligations, wife needs more sleep than I.
> 
> Since we take our time for having boudoir type of sex, it is each other day as a standard. The other night is for getting an hour extra sleep.


My wife and I are both HD...10-15 times a week. As I've said here many times, it's about priorities. Some people spend hours on Facebook, watching TV, going mountain biking...leisure activities they enjoy. Both my wife and I's leisure activity of choice is having sex, so we make time for it because we enjoy it, and it is important to us.


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## Shoto1984 (Apr 11, 2009)

And you don't have to be fully awake either lol


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## TheCuriousWife (Jan 28, 2013)

larry.gray said:


> Daily would be preferred. Every other day would be OK. Any less than every 3rd would be unacceptable.


:smthumbup:

Swoon.


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## Holland (Aug 20, 2012)

See_Listen_Love said:


> I consider myself HD, but I cannot understand how you do this logistically, life is busy, we get tired, we have lots of obligations, wife needs more sleep than I.
> 
> Since we take our time for having boudoir type of sex, it is each other day as a standard. The other night is for getting an hour extra sleep.


It isn't that difficult to do if it is as Sam says a priority. For us it is a priority so we make the time to connect in this way as it is something that we both thrive on.

We are a daily plus couple so for arguments sake it is anywhere from 10 minutes to 1 hr per session, average it out to 30 mins times 15 times per week and we are only talking about 7 or 8 hrs a week.

We are busy people, 5 kids between us, he has a great career in upper Management, stress, deadlines etc.
I am always busy with PT work, volunteering, coffee/lunches with friends and family a couple of times a week. We are just about to finish a complete home reno from top to bottom, inside and outside where Mr H and I have done a lot of the work ourselves. 
We are also starting to have planning sessions for a business we will start together soon.
Then we do a lot of other things together, movies, cycling, cooking, socialising, Opera, live bands etc.
He has his sport that gets played one night a week and the kids have a heap of activities between them like sport, extra study lessons, dance lessons and then there is the driving them around to social events.

We simply make time for our sex life as it is very high on our priority list.


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## naiveonedave (Jan 9, 2014)

wish i could get closer to the 2+ x per week. Life just gets in the way too much. I do notice that by day 4 wo, it is about all I think about....


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## See_Listen_Love (Jun 28, 2012)

@holland and @samyeager,


How you manage your schedules is incomprehensible to me, but I applaud for you.


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## Holland (Aug 20, 2012)

SLL reading it on the screen and it would sound incomprehensible but it just all works here. Sometimes we fall into bed exhausted, rest and then connect. We just have to connect in this way and it has to be extreme tiredness that stops us.

But for some perspective we have both come from sexless past marriages. I lived a sexually dead life for many years and the pain it caused me is something that I will never accept again.
No doubt Mr H and I will slow down at some stage, we are only 3 years together but the flip side is that as we are both middle aged we are determined to keep our sex life strong in case the day comes where we are not able to be so active.
An active sex life is a huge priority for both of us.

I just wish I had the same energy/time/priority to go to the gym regularly, maybe next week


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## See_Listen_Love (Jun 28, 2012)

We both spend enough time (at least 3 times a week) on sport to stay fit enough to enjoy our sex life after thirty years of marriage.

Makes us stand out in our social circle I believe. So don't forget to start going to the gym!


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

I don't think I would call my Husband High drive...(meaning he wouldn't be frustrated /climbing the walls if not every day)....yet he would say there is no better past time....I would call him highly affectionate & never tires of "working it up"...

At age 50, my guess is he'd be content with 3 times a week...but it's always more than this.. something we're both happy about .


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## DoF (Mar 27, 2014)

I have a range

Acceptable range:
Daily
Few times a day
Every other day
Period time off (SO still takes care of me) 

Unacceptable range:
Anything outside of above

:rofl:

I'm sure there has been times when it was 2-3 days off.....but I don't remember and could probably count those times on one of my hands.


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## cosquin (Sep 16, 2014)

Well, for me quantity is inversely proportional with quality. At this point of my life, I prefer quality.


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## See_Listen_Love (Jun 28, 2012)

cosquin said:


> Well, for me quantity is inversely proportional with quality. At this point of my life, I prefer quality.


The equation contains more variables then only quantity and quality, it is thus possible to have quality AND quantity at the same time. You just need to find the key parameters if you want to up the quantity.


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## Waits4Mr.Right (Oct 29, 2011)

Our average is about once a wk, probably more like once every 2~3 wks in the winter time. Boyfriend lives in the mountains 2+hrs away. Travel is harder in the winter b/c of snow. 
The boyfriend worries about this...and w/ his age worries that he won't be able to perform. I told him if it ever gets to the point of needing pills ect. we'd take care of it when the time calls for it. He teases that @ least I still have b.o.b (battery operated boyfriend) but I assure him that it can't provide the closeness that I crave...of course I'd like to make love at least 2×'s a wk but it's just not possible.  .....However I love him, so he's worth the wait.


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## cosquin (Sep 16, 2014)

See_Listen_Love said:


> The equation contains more variables then only quantity and quality, it is thus possible to have quality AND quantity at the same time. You just need to find the key parameters if you want to up the quantity.


Yeah, as possible it is possible. Athough it is difficult to sustain over long time both (quantity and quality).
Then, based more in reality than in idealized assumptions, the choice is quantity vs quality.
I certainly prefer to have a weekly meeting with all the condiments that one daily routine and monotonous.
Now, if someone claims to have both, and even more: hold it along the time... well, then I really congratulate, because it is very difficult to achieve.


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## larry.gray (Feb 21, 2011)

cosquin said:


> Well, for me quantity is inversely proportional with quality. At this point of my life, I prefer quality.


So totally opposite for me. At a one week interval I'm so horny that I'm on a hair trigger. No time for either of us to enjoy it. Daily is about right for me.


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## ET1SSJonota (Dec 25, 2012)

I go through cycles of "need" if you will. Usually I would say, if I hadn't been getting as much, that daily is what I would like to stay satisfied. But on those occasions when she is really in the mood for a while, I don't think an extended period of daily is actually required. We go up to a week at a time, at the end of which I'm usually fairly irritable and already feeling undesired, but usually more at 2-3 times a week. 
Someone mentioned quality over quantity - and I would strongly agree with that. If my wife showed strong desire once a week, I don't think I'd have a problem waiting for those times... but daily wouldn't be very satisfying if it was "duty sex" - which I loathe.


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## See_Listen_Love (Jun 28, 2012)

cosquin said:


> Yeah, as possible it is possible. Athough it is difficult to sustain over long time both (quantity and quality).
> Then, based more in reality than in idealized assumptions, the choice is quantity vs quality.
> I certainly prefer to have a weekly meeting with all the condiments that one daily routine and monotonous.
> Now, if someone claims to have both, and even more: hold it along the time... well, then I really congratulate, because it is very difficult to achieve.


No, it is easy. I like to say things like that, because I have put a lot of thought in this. It is like how Steve Jobs inspires people to seek the essence of things, and combines it with elegance, simplicity and fun.

It can be done, the problem I see with people is they cannot believe it could be done. Therefore they do not really seek and try, do not find, and come to the conclusion: 'See, I was right it could not be done'.

I always win the argument about things being easy. But when people admit it, they say: 'Yeah if you look at it thàt way it is true'. Next they still refuse to look themselves at it 'that' way. Which is the right way to achieve the goal.

People most of the time are where they WANT to be, and want to stay there because it is the most comfortable place, as they see it.

So how do you think about that, could you change??


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## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

This thread has made me redefine calling myself HD. I think at best I'm average drive. I like sex several times a week but would not enjoy every single day.

Just purely curious if I may ask a question. Do you feel the same built up tension every single day when you have sex as when you miss a couple days. For me the build up tension is the part that makes it go from good to incredible. So for the HD guys does it get that built up tension if you're doing it every single day?


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

Wolf1974 said:


> Just purely curious if I may ask a question. Do you feel the same built up tension every single day when you have sex as when you miss a couple days. For me the build up tension is the part that makes it go from good to incredible. So for the HD guys does it get that built up tension if you're doing it every single day?


No, with daily sex the tension doesn't build up the same as when there's a day or so gap. The tension creates anticipation, but for me has absolutely no affect on how good the sex is. It can be just as incredible the third time in the same day, or merely just "good" even after a gap.


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## 4x4 (Apr 15, 2014)

For me, anticipation is building within minutes to hours not days. I'm already at max anticipation by 24 hours.


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## Toshiba2020 (Mar 1, 2012)

Not sure if i qualify as HD. For reference im in my late 20s

every day is possible but unnecessary 
3-4 times a week ideal for me
1-2 times a week would be a bare minimum
1-2 times a month or less is grounds for divorce IMO, this is also considered a sexless marriage by most therapists and medical doctors and considered a serious problem in most cases.

Sadly im in that last category but not by choice 



samyeagar said:


> My wife and I are both HD...10-15 times a week. As I've said here many times, it's about priorities. Some people spend hours on Facebook, watching TV, going mountain biking...leisure activities they enjoy. Both my wife and I's leisure activity of choice is having sex, so we make time for it because we enjoy it, and it is important to us.


Exactly! Ive tried explaining this to my wife when she comes up with a hundred different reason why there isnt time or energy left at the end of the day to do it.

yet she had time to call her mom for 45 minutes, browse facebook, play with the dog and knit a pot holder. 

Theres 168 hours in a week, to not be able to devote 30 min a couple times a week to your spouse is insulting. The very person you supposedly love more than anyone else in the world and vowed to spend the rest of your life with. Theyre basically saying this pot holder is more important than my spouse or knowing what a person from high school, who ive never actually spoken too and have not seen in over a decade is up to is more important than you.

Some people just dont get it...


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## larry.gray (Feb 21, 2011)

Wolf1974 said:


> Just purely curious if I may ask a question. Do you feel the same built up tension every single day when you have sex as when you miss a couple days.


The tension is ideal at the 6 to 18 hour time window. It's a bit of a cumulative effect though... No sex for a couple of days can be followed by only a few hours with plenty of 'tension' still, but if it's daily then the 12-18 hour window is ideal.

More time in between than that and it's over too fast. I don't think it would be truly categorized as premature, but it takes my wife a while to get off from PIV. She needs a good 10-15 minutes most of the time and I'm not going to last that long with more of a wait. 

Also how big the O was plays a factor. Oral to orgasm or a really good shag will drain me a bit longer. Sometimes my wife really gets going hard and fast and when I do it really drains me. I won't have the 'tension' 24 hours later. But if the choice is less explosive sex vs. none I'll take the less explosive that time. It'll be followed by a better one the next day.



Wolf1974 said:


> For me the build up tension is the part that makes it go from good to incredible. So for the HD guys does it get that built up tension if you're doing it every single day?


Yep. When we first started dating it was 3-4 times a day. We've slowed down a lot.


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## larry.gray (Feb 21, 2011)

4x4 said:


> For me, anticipation is building within *minutes* to hours not days. I'm already at max anticipation by 24 hours.


I'm similar. The part that sucks about getting older is that I still have the want to go again minutes later, but just can't. I need an about an hour before I'm going to orgasm again.


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## 4x4 (Apr 15, 2014)

larry.gray said:


> I'm similar. The part that sucks about getting older is that I still have the want to go again minutes later, but just can't. I need an about an hour before I'm going to orgasm again.


Yessir, the older I get the more the rest of the body is worn out before the libido. I agree with your other post about the cumulative effects.


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## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

Ok thanks for the side bar. Appreciate the answers. Definitely not HD


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## Sports Fan (Aug 21, 2014)

If i had my way, daily.

In a reality twice a week would pacify my needs.


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## See_Listen_Love (Jun 28, 2012)

Wolf1974 said:


> This thread has made me redefine calling myself HD. I think at best I'm average drive. I like sex several times a week but would not enjoy every single day.
> 
> Just purely curious if I may ask a question. Do you feel the same built up tension every single day when you have sex as when you miss a couple days. For me the build up tension is the part that makes it go from good to incredible. So for the HD guys does it get that built up tension if you're doing it every single day?


You are not HD if you get sex every day, you are HD if you want sex every day! 


(or with every good looking woman :ezpi_wink1


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## T&T (Nov 16, 2012)

Wolf1974 said:


> This thread has made me redefine calling myself HD. I think at best I'm average drive. I like sex several times a week but would not enjoy every single day.
> 
> Just purely curious if I may ask a question. Do you feel the same built up tension every single day when you have sex as when you miss a couple days. For me the build up tension is the part that makes it go from good to incredible. So for the HD guys does it get that built up tension if you're doing it every single day?


FWIW, I'm the same as you Wolf. A few times a week is great! Anymore and it takes away from it being incredible. We both prefer a little time between although her drive is getting higher and higher. Sometimes it's hard to keep up. But, I try my best! 

When I was younger the time between was shorter.


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## Shoto1984 (Apr 11, 2009)

This just fits in so well here.... "Gimme Some Lovin" :smthumbup:


Spencer Davis Group - "Gimme Some Lovin" (1966) - YouTube


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## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

T&T said:


> FWIW, I'm the same as you Wolf. A few times a week is great! Anymore and it takes away from it being incredible. We both prefer a little time between although her drive is getting higher and higher. Sometimes it's hard to keep up. But, I try my best!
> 
> When I was younger the time between was shorter.


Agreed. I mean I could have sex everyday. And I would enjoy it everyday but without the build up it wouldn't be as much quality. Just the way I work and seems like HD find the quality in every experience no matter how much they have it.

Guess I thought that being able to go for hours at a time several times a week made me HD. Apparently a whole other level out there


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