# Could he be testing me ???



## rome2012 (Sep 10, 2010)

Summary.....(ex?)husband has asked for a divorce on Labor Day weekend "I don't love you anymore, only as the mother of my children".....said it was all due to me ignoring his pleading for me to change my inability to handle money (debt), not furthering my career, and keeping the house a "pig sty".....

He wants a civil divorce (he signs, I sign, he goes to court, judge signs....divorced)....

For the next couple of months he gave me bits of hope only to shut them down right after.....he was nice to me (hope) only to be presenting me with the decree shortly after and when I hesitated to sign he would try to pressure me....all that over and over for about 3 months.....

One day in December I found cell phone pics of a half naked tattooed skank on his PC (thanks to our 3-year old) and everything all of a sudden made sense.....the texting, the divorce request out of the f***ing blue.....

I was livid, but wouldn't reveal my knowledge just yet.....

A couple of days later I had it and told him I knew about her and that I found the pics....he just said "Nothing with me in it !!!".....

I was so upset I wrote a last letter telling him what I love about him, what I was sorry for, and that I am making those changes even if we're not together.....and I told him that I always loved him and always will.....

He read the letter and was sorta depressed after it...

On his birthday shortly after I bought him his favorite Greek food, a cake and put it with the signed divorce decree on his desk....he was confused and didn't say a word...

The days after that were bad because we had to put down our dog, we were both comforting each other and were really close....

Ever since then his behavior has been very odd....at first depressed and sad....now nice, sweet and almost loving towards me....

He took us to my favorite restaurant, he bought me one of my favorite snacks, he keeps asking me if I need help with my college homework....

Even my friends and co-workers noticed his behavior and were asking me about it....

I keep wrecking my brain what could be going on and I thought today....could he be testing me ????

I've not seen the final judgment of dissolution of our marriage yet....I don't even know if we're still married.....

We haven't told the kids anything yet.....(we still live together)....

Could he have put the divorce on hold after my heartfelt letter, the closeness when our dog passed away, seeing me sticking with my changes (going to the gym regularly), me finally starting college on January 4th......could this all made him realize that I was not all bad....

Could he be testing me to see if I keep it up even though we are "divorced"....meaning doing the changes for me and not just because I want him back ????

He's turned into exactly the man he used to be before Labor Day weekend.....loving, sweet....just perfect.....

What do you think about this....and what do you think I should do now ???


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## hopemom (Dec 22, 2010)

Marriages need attention, maybe this was just the kick in the pants you both needed. Keep working on the things you are, pay attention to his needs (not all the time) and expect that you can work things out. Hang in there, at least you can always know you did all you could.


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## rome2012 (Sep 10, 2010)

I do....I know I'm doing everything I can to prove to him that I am who he's always known I can be.....

Thanks !!!!!!


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