# Teaching teens to drive



## Bluesclues (Mar 30, 2016)

I am looking for any helpful advice on teaching a teen to drive. My son just got his learner’s permit and we need to put in 30 hours of parent driving before he can start the actual driving instruction portion of driver’s education. We started with some parking lot driving today and I think he did really well (after a few brake slams that will definitely leave some bruises from the seatbelt.)

I have heard from some friends and family that the “sink or swim” method works best - just pick the kid up from wherever and tell them they are driving home. The thought of that sets off all sorts of control/anxiety issues with me, but I don’t want my issues to impact him. One friend had her daughter drive 50+ miles to a concert on highways just two weeks after her daughter got her permit. That seems insane to me, but they all survived and it certainly boosted the daughter’s confidence.

I am sure each kid is different, I just want to get an idea of what worked and what didn’t for parents on TAM.

PS. Just to be clear, I am not a fearful driver (far from it), but I am a fearful passenger, even with experienced drivers. I wish someone else (father or step-father) would step in to play this role but it isn’t going to happen.


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## notmyjamie (Feb 5, 2019)

I taught all three of my kids to drive. I started them in parking lots, moved up to small residential neighboorhoods, and finally onto main roads when I felt they had steering, turning, and braking down well. They all did fantastic with this method.

Good luck!!!


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

Do you have to do that where you live? I would much prefer to use a qualified driving instructor who has duel controls. In the UK many are taught completely or largely by a good instructor with maybe some practising between lessons from parents.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

I taught both boys to drive. First riding lawn mowers, field trucks, tractors, (do horses count🙂?).

I started them as soon as they could reach the lawn mower pedals.

It was teaching them driving in traffic that was challenging. But we did.


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## AmberP (Apr 21, 2021)

It's not that scary, it's easy to teach kids. Or entrust the matter to professionals. My eldest son learned with me, in the parking lot, and then went to auto school. It was the right decision.


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## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

My son was learning to drive - farm trucks, tractors, ATVs, etc. - from about age 10. But he still needed real-world, on-road, driving instruction and practice when he got his learner's permit at 15. 

I think many people have an easier time being a good driving instructor (or teacher or sports coach or life mentor) to other people's kids than they do their own. I know it was always harder for me to coach my son at soccer or little league than it was to coach other people's kids. 

A good friend of mine and I both had children very close in age (10 days apart, in fact), so they were learning to drive at the same time. We swapped kids for a few weekend driving lessons. I taught her daughter, and she and her husband taught my son. The kids were more relaxed, the adults in the passenger seats were more relaxed, and everyone got to go home after the lessons with people they _hadn't_ been in a stressful situation with all afternoon. It worked great! So well, in fact, that several of our other friends did something similar when their own kids were learning to drive. 

So, it might be worthwhile to see if there's a friend or another parent to a new driver, who could teach your son to drive. Or, as others have mentioned, just send him to a professional driving instructor.


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