# Don't rush to get Divorced



## Hardtohandle (Jan 10, 2013)

Just a word of advice. 

When my STBXW decided to leave me after 19 years for another man she meet 5 months ago. I rushed to a lawyer to get Divorced because I was trying to get this done for her. Some reason I felt compelled to make this easier for her. Basically see honey I am doing what you want, please forgive me. Who the Fvck knows..

Anyways we could have been Divorced by the End of January start of February. My kids would have left with her. But things get delayed, Paperwork isn't correct. Lawyers take their time or are busy.

What happens is sometimes like in my case the Wayward Spouse ends up showing their true colors. 

Today my oldest boy is staying with me. My youngest will probably end up wanting to come home within a few weeks of moving out just from missing his Brother, Me, His Grandmother, Uncle and of course the Dog.

I'm not trying to play games here, but the reality is not having to pay my wife child support or half as we agreed if one child stays with me and having the possibility of her having to pay me child support eventually on top of having to explain how a mother lost her children is pretty much a kick in the face for my STBXW, which makes me happy in some ways.

If I would have rushed, I don't think things would have played out the way they did. 

So take your time and wait until YOU have a clear mind to make a good decision.


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## keko (Mar 21, 2012)

In some states you have to rush in divorce. There is a fine line between paying a few years alimony and a lifetime one.

Every situation is different.


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## Hardtohandle (Jan 10, 2013)

keko said:


> In some states you have to rush in divorce. There is a fine line between paying a few years alimony and a lifetime one.
> 
> Every situation is different.


Very true.. 

We settled out of court so all she is getting is 45k and 700 dollars a month for 1 child in child support. No alimony, no maintenance, Absolutely nothing else. The pressure from the OM worked in my favor.


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## I'mInLoveWithMyHubby (Nov 7, 2011)

I couldn't get divorced fast enough. I rushed as quickly as possible to get rid of that jerk forever. 6 months seemed like an eternity for that court date to arrive.

I was lucky to get $200 monthly for child support. Nothing more. Oh wait, he scammed over 20 grand in identity theft in my name.:/. Not to mention he was abusive towards me.


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

Absolutely! I would drag my heels until she believed she was desperately in love with this clown and/or pregnant with his child. She'd sign anything I put in front of her. In any negotiation, the most motivated party gets the crap end of the stick. I'd make sure she was the most motivated party on earth. When she believes she'd give anything to get out of the marriage, that's the time to hand her the papers. She'd be lucky to get out with her own DNA.


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