# Small mouth sensitive gag reflex = no BJs



## Scotsirish (Feb 14, 2014)

My wife says she has a small mouth and a sensitive gag reflex which excuses her from giving BJs. Makes her jaw hurt. She will lick my **** which is nice, but "meh" to me.

I'm circumcised, clean, and of average size and girth. She likes receiving oral, but is not enthused about pleasuring me in the oral department. I have not made this a big issue, but I have made it known that this is something that I want more and better of. I think she is not pulling her weight in this area.

What do you think? What's going on with her? How can I help her step up to the plate?


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

OMG blow jobs are not every mans god given right you know. Maybe try being a little sensitive to your wife's feelings about it? Using terms like 'not pulling her weight' and 'help her step up to the plate' make you sound like an a$$, sorry to say.


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

Did she give her affair partner head during her 6 year affair?


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Stop doing oral on her. Tell her you sprained your tongue and won't be able to do it for a while. See how that works.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

WorkingOnMe said:


> Did she give her affair partner head during her 6 year affair?


Good point. 

Did she?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

It sounds to me like you're mad at your wife and this is what you think she owes you for cheating on you.


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

WorkingOnMe said:


> Did she give her affair partner head during her 6 year affair?


She claims no intercourse so what else would it be?


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## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

Hope1964 said:


> She claims no intercourse so what else would it be?


HJ's???


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## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

OP, why would you even WANT to stay with your wife if she had a 6 year affair on you?


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

Hope1964 said:


> She claims no intercourse so what else would it be?



No intercourse in a 6 year affair? Lololololol!!!!! Ya cause guys stick around that long for the great conversation all the time.


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## Giro flee (Mar 12, 2013)

I've got a very sensitive gag reflex, brushing my own teeth is a problem. I can do oral for my husband with a mixture of both hands, one down low cradling/playing with the boys and the other hand at the lower end of the shaft my mouth working the tip and upper part of the shaft.. I try to do a mixture of hands, licking and sucking to give my jaw a break until I feel like he is getting close.

Back in the day H used to tell me "don't stop" and that was my cue to keep it going until the big finish. Now I know him really well so I'm completely in charge. The explosion at the end still makes me gag, my husband is usually too occupied to notice, and as long as I didn't eat a big meal beforehand I don't throw up. With this mixture I can drag out a bj for quite a while and the "job" part of it is limited to a few minutes right at the end.

Didn't realize there were deeper issues, no pun intended.


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## NotLikeYou (Aug 30, 2011)

Holy Crap!

I went back and read your other 3 posts to see what Workingonme was talking about, and, well, boy do you read some interesting stuff on TAM.

Okay. Out of courtesy, I try to respond directly to the topic before I start offering opinions, sarcasm, or whatever.

So, what do I think? I think your wife probably didn't have a gag reflex or any other problems with her affair partner over the course of their 6 years of encounters. I think she doesn't respect you as a man, much less a husband, and considering what she got away with, I can see where she might not respect you or want to give you mouth hugs.

What's going on with her? She's missing her affair partner's affection. Supposedly. I say supposedly because her disinterest in gobbling your knob suggests to me that she may still be hangin' with affair-boy. I expect that if you went into more detail, her response in bad could be described as "disinterested," "non-participative," or maybe "doesn't want to be there, doing that, with you," whether its oral or just plain old intercourse.

How can you help her step up to the plate? Serve her with surprise divorce papers! Maybe that will lend some sense of importance to her putting a little more effort into making you happy.


So, now that all that is out of the way.......

Scots, I don't know if you got tested for STDs after you found out about your wife having "great conversation" with another man for 6 years, but that needs to happen if it hasn't, yet.

If you start a personal thread about your experience over in Coping With Infidelity, maybe Lord Mayhem will stop by and post his chart on "Reconciliation versus Rug Sweeping," and somebody else will post a link to the 180. I have to think you would get a lot of information, opinions, and feedback dumped on you, and it seems like you need it.

Again, you haven't gone into a lot of detail, but from what I can tell, especially including the problem you identify in this thread, I think you could use some help. And by help, I mean professional counseling, as well as the support of strangers on the internet that is the awesome power of TAM.

I hope you find a path to greater fulfillment in your marriage, if that is what you decide you really want!


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

Six-year PA w/ no PIV? And you believed that...?!? 

That's awesome, because I have some Bitcoins that I'd like to sell you. Nevermind that they say "Chuck E. Cheese" on them, they're legit.

I swear.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

I'd say "honey you had a 6 year affair with another man and I took you back, so open wide and take a huge deep breath like you really mean it, because it might need to last for several minutes".


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

Plan 9 from OS said:


> HJ's???


Tiny mouth ... tiny hands.

In all seriousness, if she had a six year PA you know she did something. HJs? whatever. If he was regulary going down on her that is actually plenty.

This all said, there is no amount of sex your wife can give you to make up for six years of that. I suspect you trying to move on is rug sweeping but you have not elaborated. 

You have been married over 30 years. Ugh. How long ago was this PA? 

But you know what? Do not force her to do this for you. Please consider cutting your losses and finding what you are looking for. Life is too short.


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## Sandfly (Dec 8, 2013)

GusPolinski said:


> Six-year PA w/ no PIV? And you believed that...?!?
> 
> That's awesome, because I have some Bitcoins that I'd like to sell you. Nevermind that they say "Chuck E. Cheese" on them, they're legit.
> 
> I swear.


I like that Gus.

I too am having trouble wrapping my mind around the OP's experiences.

I'll be in a position to swap you chucky-cheese bitcoins for 50 pound notes and still profit from said transaction, once the conservative-liberal coalition in the UK is finished 'fixing' our economy


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## Accipiter777 (Jul 22, 2011)

Hope1964 said:


> OMG blow jobs are not every mans god given right you know. Maybe try being a little sensitive to your wife's feelings about it? Using terms like 'not pulling her weight' and 'help her step up to the plate' make you sound like an a$$, sorry to say.


Will have to remember this when a woman complains her husband won't oral her... even tho she orals him.

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/sex-marriage/189066-oral-hell-take-but-wont-give.html

If I go down on my wife, I feel resentful that I don't get to feel that for myself.
If I don't, I feel guilty that I that I've not fulfilled her desire.... I stopped do it completely. I'd rather be mad at myself for not doing so, then feel resentful to her for not RECIPROCATING something I've done for her for the last 25 years, and I know she misses it . all the innuendo just last night about cunnilungus would fill a book.


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## sparkyjim (Sep 22, 2012)

GusPolinski said:


> Six-year PA w/ no PIV? And you believed that...?!?
> 
> That's awesome, because I have some Bitcoins that I'd like to sell you. Nevermind that they say "Chuck E. Cheese" on them, they're legit.
> 
> I swear.


:rofl: g - da*n it GUS... you gotta stop


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## sparkyjim (Sep 22, 2012)

Hope1964 said:


> OMG blow jobs are not every mans god given right you know.


Oh yes they are...

That's is one reason why I married a woman who likes to please me that way.

I made sure on the test drive...

After that I was sold.


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## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

Entropy3000 said:


> Tiny mouth ... tiny hands.
> 
> In all seriousness, if she had a six year PA you know she did something. HJs? whatever. If he was regulary going down on her that is actually plenty.
> 
> ...


It was tongue in cheek... (Pun intended).


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## over20 (Nov 15, 2013)

Man...am I the only one here who just wants to advise a poster without having to go search the old threads???? I guess I have to step it up....


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## U.E. McGill (Nov 27, 2013)

Hope1964 said:


> OMG blow jobs are not every mans god given right you know. Maybe try being a little sensitive to your wife's feelings about it? Using terms like 'not pulling her weight' and 'help her step up to the plate' make you sound like an a$$, sorry to say.



I call bs on this one. Intimacy certainly is. Oral is mainstream and should be offered equally. His wife's feelings are hers to deal with. Personally it sounds like she trying to guilt him out of it. 

I dated a girl who claimed the same exact reasons. But get a few glasses of wine in her and suddenly she was Linda Lovelace. 

After her I vowed I'd never date a girl who didn't embrace it. My wife was a champ and you know what? That's important to me.


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## usmarriedguy (Dec 9, 2013)

No, I do not think it is a God given right and how common any particular sexual act is, is irrelevant. 

That is something you had better make sure of before getting married. 

I would advise not giving her oral so that you can at least feel like you are equal 

...but that could backfire. 

The person who can do with less sex always has the upper hand and if you make sex less enjoyable for her it could be that she would be less interested in sex over all.

As long as she is willing -practice makes perfect. She will be able to overcome her gag reflex (some) and sore muscles with practice. Have her give you oral for a few minutes every time you have sex and slowly build up the time. After a year or so she will probably be a champ. (as long as she is willing)

-at least that worked for my wife.


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## I Don't Know (Oct 8, 2013)

T2? Is that you?


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## carpenoctem (Jul 4, 2012)

Scotsirish said:


> My wife says she has a small mouth and a sensitive gag reflex which excuses her from giving BJs. Makes her jaw hurt. She will lick my **** which is nice, but "meh" to me.
> 
> I'm circumcised, clean, and of average size and girth. She likes receiving oral, but is not enthused about pleasuring me in the oral department. I have not made this a big issue, but I have made it known that this is something that I want more and better of. I think she is not pulling her weight in this area.
> 
> What do you think? What's going on with her? How can I help her step up to the plate?



She hasn't yet mentioned *penis reduction surgery,* has she?

I guess you should be thankful for THAT.


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

Getting over a gag reflex is possible if you actually try to work it. Also, she doesn't have to have her mouth fully stuffed and wide open for a full 10 minutes. What does she do when she goes to the dentist?

It's just like everything else, practice makes perfect.


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## xakulax (Feb 9, 2014)

WorkingOnMe said:


> Did she give her affair partner head during her 6 year affair?



:iagree:



The BS level is over 9000 


She probably give the om head and wants to keep it from op to keep the memory of her affair this is nothing new for any unremorseful WS trying to keep some part of the affair alive


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## xakulax (Feb 9, 2014)

WorkingOnMe said:


> No intercourse in a 6 year affair? Lololololol!!!!! Ya cause guys stick around that long for the great conversation all the time.



No man in his right mind has an affair with a married woman for 6 years and not expect sex in all its various forms 



Seriously what world is she on 6 YEARS and no sex what did you do talk about your feelings :scratchhead:


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## Scotsirish (Feb 14, 2014)

Thanks to all who have given thoughtful, helpful advice. I will certainly consider and try some of the suggestions.

I have not shared the whole story about wife's affair, but I will give you a brief synopsis. For those who think it has a bearing on my current question, this information may be helpful. Believe me, I understand where a lot of you are coming from - and along with you, I have to wonder and take a lot of what my wife said with a grain huge grain of salt. I am still dealing with a lot of negative emotions, feelings, thoughts and have not ruled out leaving the marriage. We are currently in therapy and much of what she revealed was in front of the therapist.

Wife got involved with a therapist about 23 years ago. Confessed 15 years ago. She says physical aspect of affair lasted 6 months (then changed to 9 months). Says never had intercourse, she never performed oral on him. They made out, he did oral on her, fingered her, mutual masturbation stuff. She said she stopped physical aspect of relationship (I think because she knew he would not leave his wife), but she was emotionally bonded with him and continued to see him at first she said for 3 years, then recently, revealed it to be six years. Since I was not present during those activities, I chose to believe that a lot of what she says are not truthful. Is she still emotionally connected with him? I don't know. She says she hates him now, but that doesn't mean she doesn't secretly cherish whatever they had.

I have chosen to not pull the plug YET on the marriage, but I have not ruled that out.


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

At therapist or her therapist?

To be honest, therapists are kinda...weird. So I think I could believe the emotional attachment only thing.


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Your wife is lying to you. Problem is you will never be able to prove it now.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## carpenoctem (Jul 4, 2012)

Reflections:

*6-year PA, but no PIV sex?

“I did not… …have a sexual relationship… …with that man!”… … …?

Possible, if she was having an affair with Bill Clinton.*


To think about:

Should you counter her gag reflex with lingual spondylitis or something of that sort – as tit for t_at?

If you do that, will that get her back on the game, or get a whole cuisine out of the marital menu?


Caveat:

When you discuss this with your wife, remember: *don’t put big words in her mouth. We know she wouldn’t like that.*

If any of these PJs make you want to puke, remember: *THAT is what gag-reflex originally meant.*


P.S.:
Your post seemed a bit anachronistic. When you say ‘I haven’t ruled that out’, are you saying that you might leave her because you still haven’t been able to heal from her affair after all these years, or just because of her sexual ‘inadequacy’?


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## xakulax (Feb 9, 2014)

Her affair partner was a therapist I thought therapist were supposed to be rationale and logical smh.



OP its either one or two things she either has tied bj with the affair and does not want to remind herself of it or or she's trying to keep those fond memories of the affair private either way is definitely affair related.


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## xakulax (Feb 9, 2014)

intheory said:


> @scotsirish
> 
> "I have chosen to not pull the plug YET on the marriage, but I have not ruled that out."
> -----------------------
> ...




I agree six years is not just an affair it's another marriage Op unless you have some extreme circumstances I think it's time for you consider leaving this marriage.


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## NotLikeYou (Aug 30, 2011)

Scots-

Thanks for providing more information about the background conditions you are dealing with.

Hope1964's original comment was correct. Oral is not a right. And maybe if you just made wifey feel all special then she would be more amenable and bullsh!t, bullsh!t, bullsh!t.

Here's the thing. The affair may have ended years ago, but it's NEW TO YOU.

Given social mores, "oral sex" just isn't some kind of taboo, super-kinky type of sex reserved for perverts and deviants anymore. It's considered by most sexually active people to be a pretty normal way of showing you care, going both ways.

It seems to me that, given the revelation of infidelity on the part of your wife, that if she were serious about making amends and making the relationship work, that she would not be using her mouth to make excuses. 

Separate from that, her list of actions conducted in the affair just doesn't sound true. I think that a therapist who was doing that to his patients would be able to get inside their head more than just mentally.

I'm pretty jaded, but, damn, man, I feel for you. I hope that whatever you decide to do, that it works out for you and leads you to a better and happier life than you've got right now.


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## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

Small mouth and gag reflex?? Is this like a new age I have a headache tonight?


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## kilgore (Dec 14, 2012)

i've never been on the receiving end of the gag reflex, thankfully


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## Personal (Jan 16, 2014)

Scotsirish said:


> I have chosen to not pull the plug YET on the marriage, but I have not ruled that out.


Hi Scotsirish,

I am glad you haven't ruled it out, I pulled the plug on my first marriage for a lot less.

My first wife was physically unfaithful for a couple of days (I used to say it was only one night yet it was at least a couple of days, since it occurred over twenty three years ago my memory of it isn't perfect).

How can you trust her and have normal marital relations after what she has done?

Of course I am not suggesting that a spouse must never think about another or find someone attractive. That is understandable and natural, where it becomes wrong is when you breach the marriage by undertaking sexual activity outside of marriage without consent from ones spouse.

Regardless of the history if it were me in your place Scotsirish I would probably end the marriage. When I separated from my first wife, she wanted to get back together, and we dated a few times and had sex as well. Yet it was awful I was still hurt and angry so I had sex with her without any love or care for her. Although I didn't hurt her at all, it's hard to explain how awful the sex was since I hated her for what she had done.

So from that, the best thing to do was to divorce her and move onto a better life.

As to having a small mouth etc, I concur that oral sex is not a right, it is however a reasonable expectation, of course there are some who have trouble with this as related by intheory so discounting a sensitive gag reflex is a little harsh.

Best.


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## CuddleBug (Nov 26, 2012)

Scotsirish said:


> My wife says she has a small mouth and a sensitive gag reflex which excuses her from giving BJs. Makes her jaw hurt. She will lick my **** which is nice, but "meh" to me.
> 
> I'm circumcised, clean, and of average size and girth. She likes receiving oral, but is not enthused about pleasuring me in the oral department. I have not made this a big issue, but I have made it known that this is something that I want more and better of. I think she is not pulling her weight in this area.
> 
> What do you think? What's going on with her? How can I help her step up to the plate?




She should learn how to give great blow jobs as your loving woman. Not out of duty but out of love. If she does have a serious gag reflex, then a lot of licking and only taking in your tip is fine. My wifee takes most of me in her mouth and sometimes only licks and takes in my tip if she doesn't want to get into oral that time.

If she likes to receive oral, she must give oral in return. This is not what she wants and meh to you. She can learn how to give great blow jobs. Internet you know.....

Or she can let you have deep anal sex instead and see how she likes that?!

She should be making the effort to give you great blow jobs because she knows you love them and she loves you.

How's this? No blow jobs for you = no oral sex for her. It hurts your jaw for giving her oral sex for 15+ minutes.....

The way I see it, neither of you are your own anymore and both are to take care of each others needs as your own.

Why don't you do 69 with her and she is on top? She can control how much goes in her mouth and you can grab her bum, go to town on her and she can't squirm away from all the pleasure you are giving her. And I'm sure you won't be saying, my jaw hurts, I'm not into oral.....

http://www.yourtango.com/experts/sean-jameson/how-deep-throat

http://badgirlsbible.com/blowjob-bible?utm_expid=56840161-34.4BgjLm2RQkWKiEB27xaMwg.0


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## usmarriedguy (Dec 9, 2013)

intheory said:


> Mouths, jawbones, tendons and teeth aren't like vaginas/anus. They aren't supple,lubricated or innately stretchy.


Huh? 
Your teeth and jawbone do not need to stretch. The muscles and tendons and joints that connect the jaws do and they are just like any other muscles and tendons and joints. 

As far as I know porn stars are not born with naturally large mouths and several of them are quite small while having to work with abnormally large males. 

The fact that you like to eat smaller bites simply means that you have probably never had any actually desire to shove a large portion of hot dog in your mouth. (that does not mean that you could not learn to)

Not to say that you or his wife could have other medical conditions that cause pain. 

How much time have you actually spent attempting to stretch your jaw muscles? Is this something you have actually wanted to do or did you just decide it was not worth the effort to begin with? 

I am not criticizing your lack of willingness to go to that much trouble but I believe that unless you have some medical problem you could despite what you seem to believe.

I have never been fond of stretching myself, if I did I would be much more limber. 

Sword swallowers are just normal people who suppress their gag reflex.


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## Laralie (May 2, 2014)

Size of the penis makes a huge difference to me. Smaller ones are perfect for oral sex. Larger ones really do cramp my jaw quickly.


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## keeper63 (Mar 22, 2012)

To the OP, your wife's excuse is BS if you ask me, and indicates that she just isn't interested in meeting your needs. I can't imagine that she used that excuse with her affair partner, I know that if I was in a sexual relationship of any kind (married, dating, affair, etc.), a partner who refused to perform oral on me would get the boot.

My wife is about 5'1", 110# pounds, and has a tiny mouth. My penis is average-sized, perhaps a bit longer than average. Ms. Keeper has a sensitive gag reflex as well, but has learned how to overcome that, and can take my entire c*ck in her mouth/throat, especially in the 69 position. She has worked at this because she loves me and wants to please me this way.

Now if I can get her to swallow on a regular basis, that would make oral SUPER HOT for me, but we are still working on that.


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## Big Mama (Mar 24, 2014)

Ok, the OP didn't ask for an explanation of why the wife doesn't like to give oral. The question was what can be done to help with oral if you have a small mouth. 

I have a small mouth and a horrible gag reflex. Even brushing my teeth provokes my gag reflex. Someone had a good question about dentists, I can have my teeth cleaned, but no x rays. Any time I have to have dental work done I have to be sedated. My mouth is tiny on the inside. 

I have found a way to overcome this issue though. One lots of chap stick and two cloraceptic throat spray spray it as far back in the back of your mouth as possible hitting the back of your tongue and throat. It works wonders. I have a tiny mouth and I don;t recommend my H sticking his D in there. I can control a lot of things, but I can't control when someone gets bumped by a molar or bumps into a molar. In my mouth is bad place to stick anything big, a mouth full of teeth might not be somewhere you want to play with that thing.


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## Catherine602 (Oct 14, 2010)

Don't bring up anything about what porn stars do. They get lots of money to unhinge their jaws and probably endure lifelong dysfunction. I am certain this man does not want to see his wife's joint permanently injured 

According to the porn thread, a man's sexual expectations are not effected by watching porn. Is that true? Maybe it has an insidious influence. Otherwise, why would anyone use porn a porn actress bj skills as a standard for a real live woman?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## usmarriedguy (Dec 9, 2013)

"Don't bring up anything about what porn stars do."

That was not my point. 
I do not care what any person wants to do -all I was saying is that it can be done if someone chooses unless they have some unusual medical condition. I doubt pornstars are suffering from jaw problems from their work related injury (but they do get other work related injuries)


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

How do you know what their jaws feel like? I agree it's a bad idea to bring up what can be done in porn.

Either way, I have a very small mouth. So small that the dentist says I have a child's mouth and they can't use any of their contraptions to hold my mouth open because they don't fit. I can do oral on my hb and am glad to do it, but I can't do it for long periods of time because yes, it hurts my jaw.

It sounds like op has bigger problems though with a 6 year affair on his wife's part. That opens up a whole 'nother can of worms.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## over20 (Nov 15, 2013)

I have found it depends on the position of my head as to able to avoid the gag reflex. I have a small mouth also.


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## happy as a clam (Jan 5, 2014)

There are ways to give pleasurable BJs without her cramming the whole thing down her throat.

She could use her mouth and lips with you only partially in, and then when you are close to O, you go in for the kill.

I think she is making poor excuses. And if her affair included oral sex, you can bet the guy was in all the way.

Was the AP her doctor -- was she his PATIENT at the time? If so, he could lose his medical license. This is a complete violation of the doctor-patient relationship.

I would consider pursuing that...


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## usmarriedguy (Dec 9, 2013)

lifeistooshort said:


> How do you know what their jaws feel like? I agree it's a bad idea to bring up what can be done in porn.


I don't know why. If you told me you could not swallow swords I would use sword swallowers as an example of people who learn to do that. 

If you said you have no interest in swallowing swords that is a completely different reason.

So I am not suggesting that some individual does not have a particular medical reason that prevents them. All I was suggesting is that most people do not because they choose not to. -Just like I choose not to do the splits. Not because I can't but because I do not want to.


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## Catherine602 (Oct 14, 2010)

Did you report the "dr" to the professional ethics board for your state. Did you tell his wife, family, colleagues and fellow church members what a fine ethical "dr" he is. Did you warn the husbands of his other female patients to drop the creep? 

Is your wife protecting him? I don't know. This is so disgusting. She has the privilege of staying married to a faithful man and the good "dr" gets his pick of pts to fvck. Life must be good. What consequences has she suffered? 

Don't beg for bj, make plans to exit the relationship when it suits you and your kids. You won't have any problem finding a woman with a big heart and adequate mouth to give to you. I don't know why you would even bother asking her to touch you but, that's me.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Catherine602 (Oct 14, 2010)

usmarriedguy said:


> I don't know why. If you told me you could not swallow swords I would use sword swallowers as an example of people who learn to do that.
> 
> If you said you have no interest in swallowing swords that is a completely different reason.
> 
> So I am not suggesting that some individual does not have a particular medical reason that prevents them. All I was suggesting is that most people do not because they choose not to. -Just like I choose not to do the splits. Not because I can't but because I do not want to.


Happy as a Clam made excellent points. There is no "standard" cookbook way to do a bj. It depends on the two people engaged in it. A small mouth is not an impediment to a real live bj. It's an impediment to a porn-like bj. 

There are many sensitive areas of man bits that don't require constant hoovering. The hands are very useful so are fingers, lips, tongue even gentle teething. I don't need porn to know that, I have the real thing to explore. 

In fact, that is exactly what porn does not show. Slowly exploring each other and building up a repertoire of likes and dislikes. Creativity, daring, thinking out of the box, fun, crazy, passion. You don't get that from porn.


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## kilgore (Dec 14, 2012)

this is the advantage of a small penis - doesn't cause gagging


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## omgitselaine (Sep 5, 2013)

I've never have had this " gag reflex" !?!? 

I guess it's paid off going to Mass each and every Sunday thus am blessed wink wink !!

_Posted via *Topify* on Android_


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## NoWhere (Oct 2, 2012)

If she really wanted to please you she would go online and find out. There are a ton of articles on giving BJ's and how to keep from gagging. Can alternate between hands and mouth, Breathing exercises, Spitting a lot (Guys love sloppy BJ's), not going too deep etc.

Not sure of your whole story, but this 6 year affair thing makes me wonder if her heart is even in this. 

Personally I'd do anything my woman wanted and even research the act so I could do it the best way possible.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

omgitselaine said:


> I've never have had this " gag reflex" !?!?
> 
> I guess it's paid off going to Mass each and every Sunday thus am blessed wink wink !!
> 
> _Posted via *Topify* on Android_


You have been blessed and are happy to return the blessing to the object of your affections. Must be truly lovely.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

Even with a small mouth she could get the head and a portion of the shaft enough to cause a pleasureable BJ.


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## kilgore (Dec 14, 2012)

Giro flee said:


> I've got a very sensitive gag reflex, brushing my own teeth is a problem. I can do oral for my husband with a mixture of both hands, one down low cradling/playing with the boys and the other hand at the lower end of the shaft my mouth working the tip and upper part of the shaft.. I try to do a mixture of hands, licking and sucking to give my jaw a break until I feel like he is getting close.
> 
> Back in the day H used to tell me "don't stop" and that was my cue to keep it going until the big finish. Now I know him really well so I'm completely in charge. The explosion at the end still makes me gag, my husband is usually too occupied to notice, and as long as I didn't eat a big meal beforehand I don't throw up. With this mixture I can drag out a bj for quite a while and the "job" part of it is limited to a few minutes right at the end.
> 
> Didn't realize there were deeper issues, no pun intended.


wow, what a trooper.

i have never caused a woman to gag, luckily


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## committed_guy (Nov 22, 2011)

Scotsirish said:


> My wife says she has a small mouth and a sensitive gag reflex which excuses her from giving BJs. Makes her jaw hurt. She will lick my **** which is nice, but "meh" to me.
> 
> I'm circumcised, clean, and of average size and girth. She likes receiving oral, but is not enthused about pleasuring me in the oral department. I have not made this a big issue, but I have made it known that this is something that I want more and better of. I think she is not pulling her weight in this area.
> 
> What do you think? What's going on with her? How can I help her step up to the plate?


Sexual fulfillment is a right in marriage, you promised that to each other at the alter. Don't feel bad for wanting this. It is a normal part of a loving marriage.

Can she just suck on the tip and use her hand on the shaft? That way you don't have to go more then a couple inches into her mouth.

Tell her how much it means to you and if there is anything going on in your relationship that is affecting her desire to fulfill you. Is there something you are holding back that you weren't aware of? Give her permission to share that with you and take it as constructive criticism. Maybe a trip to a licensed therapist for marriage counseling might be in order.


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## soulseer (Jul 26, 2013)

I'm ok with just the first 1.5 inches being sucked. thanks.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## MrsDraper (May 27, 2013)

People are being really crabby to the OP, but he may be onto something. I don't even know what to say or do about the wife and the therapist getting involved. I see a therapist and I couldn't imagine that happening. It even makes me a little sick to my stomach. 

Anyway - in the past 2-3 years I developed major TMJ problems where the joints were basically grinding bone on bone. I had surgery that involved not only the TMJs (joints), but also involved breaking and resetting both the upper and lower jaw so everything would move in a more "harmonious" manner. If I had waited any longer I would have needed a total joint replacement on jaw joints. This caused me a lot of pain, both before and after surgery. I'm sorry, but a real BJ was / and currently is still out of the question. 

There are other ways to sexually please a spouse. But men need to realize that sometimes oral sex just can't happen. I went through major changes at home and work to try to "baby" my joints before surgery. All of it sucked. Even with all of these changes, there was still NO WAY I could have performed a proper BJ at the end of the day - or the morning. I can thank my husband for the fact that he has NEVER, ever been a jerk to me about this. He has a lot of other faults, but this is one he let slide.


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## CuddleBug (Nov 26, 2012)

My wifee also has a smaller mouth.

She can't give me full BJ's either.

So she uses her tongue a lot (really good at it) and gets half of me in her mouth while she uses her oiled hand for the other half of me. It works.


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

CuddleBug said:


> My wifee also has a smaller mouth.
> 
> She can't give me full BJ's either.
> 
> So she uses her tongue a lot (really good at it) and gets half of me in her mouth while she uses her oiled hand for the other half of me. It works.



Yeah, never underestimate the power of well oiled hands. We know this well 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Catherine602 (Oct 14, 2010)

MrsDraper said:


> People are being really crabby to the OP, but he may be onto something. I don't even know what to say or do about the wife and the therapist getting involved. I see a therapist and I couldn't imagine that happening. It even makes me a little sick to my stomach.
> 
> Anyway - in the past 2-3 years I developed major TMJ problems where the joints were basically grinding bone on bone. I had surgery that involved not only the TMJs (joints), but also involved breaking and resetting both the upper and lower jaw so everything would move in a more "harmonious" manner. If I had waited any longer I would have needed a total joint replacement on jaw joints. This caused me a lot of pain, both before and after surgery. I'm sorry, but a real BJ was / and currently is still out of the question.
> 
> There are other ways to sexually please a spouse. But men need to realize that sometimes oral sex just can't happen. I went through major changes at home and work to try to "baby" my joints before surgery. All of it sucked. Even with all of these changes, there was still NO WAY I could have performed a proper BJ at the end of the day - or the morning. I can thank my husband for the fact that he has NEVER, ever been a jerk to me about this. He has a lot of other faults, but this is one he let slide.


This may be helpful for the OP so I will ask. Do any of the suggestions sound like something you can try even with limited opening of the jaws. Cuddle seems to have a satisfactory solution. Even licking or sucking different parts of his anatomy and using hands extensively would probably make him happy. 

He sounds like a good man. It would be once to change things up a bit. Or to try different methods and find something that works. How does that sound?


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## kilgore (Dec 14, 2012)

Catherine602 said:


> This may be helpful for the OP so I will ask. Do any of the suggestions sound like something you can try even with limited opening of the jaws. Cuddle seems to have a satisfactory solution. Even licking or sucking different parts of his anatomy and using hands extensively would probably make him happy.
> 
> He sounds like a good man. It would be once to change things up a bit. Or to try different methods and find something that works. How does that sound?


maybe tell him to try having a smaller penis


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

MrsDraper said:


> People are being really crabby to the OP, but he may be onto something. I don't even know what to say or do about the wife and the therapist getting involved. I see a therapist and I couldn't imagine that happening. It even makes me a little sick to my stomach.
> 
> Anyway - in the past 2-3 years I developed major TMJ problems where the joints were basically grinding bone on bone. I had surgery that involved not only the TMJs (joints), but also involved breaking and resetting both the upper and lower jaw so everything would move in a more "harmonious" manner. If I had waited any longer I would have needed a total joint replacement on jaw joints. This caused me a lot of pain, both before and after surgery. I'm sorry, but a real BJ was / and currently is still out of the question.
> 
> There are other ways to sexually please a spouse. But men need to realize that sometimes oral sex just can't happen. I went through major changes at home and work to try to "baby" my joints before surgery. All of it sucked. Even with all of these changes, there was still NO WAY I could have performed a proper BJ at the end of the day - or the morning. I can thank my husband for the fact that he has NEVER, ever been a jerk to me about this. He has a lot of other faults, but this is one he let slide.


I was reading this saying "I know she didn't get jaw surgery so she could perform oral on the husband".

Well I get it that full oral may be out for you, but even using your hand and mouth in a conjunction will give the husband a great oral pleasure without having to be a skilled sword swallower.


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## MrsDraper (May 27, 2013)

treyvion said:


> I was reading this saying "I know she didn't get jaw surgery so she could perform oral on the husband".
> 
> Well I get it that full oral may be out for you, but even using your hand and mouth in a conjunction will give the husband a great oral pleasure without having to be a skilled sword swallower.


This post made me laugh!


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## mace85 (Mar 12, 2012)

Catherine602 said:


> Don't bring up anything about what porn stars do. They get lots of money to unhinge their jaws and probably endure lifelong dysfunction. I am certain this man does not want to see his wife's joint permanently injured
> 
> 
> 
> ...



I think the poster was using his example to make a point. And that is that of the thousands of women who do porn, at least a few have sensitive gag reflexes, and they discovered some way to get over it. In fact we have photographic evidence of that fact. So there must be a way. 

He wasn't saying she should be taking all of him into her throat every single time.


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

Oh, but, Catherine, we wives must strive to be like porn actresses! Didn't you get that memo? 

Mace, just because a porn actress does something, does not mean we "regular" women have to. Sorry, but anal is something often done in porn. That is not on the table for us. You often see threesomes in porn. NFW that will happen in my marriage... EVER. And there are often girl-girl scenes. Again, NFW. The day my husband requests I have sex with another woman is the day his bags are packed and he leaves. Same with a suggestion of threesomes or swinging. Get it? Just because a woman in a porn flick does something, it does NOT automatically translate to RL!

_Posted via *Topify* on Android_


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## over20 (Nov 15, 2013)

Maricha75 said:


> Oh, but, Catherine, we wives must strive to be like porn actresses! Didn't you get that memo?
> 
> Mace, just because a porn actress does something, does not mean we "regular" women have to. Sorry, but anal is something often done in porn. That is not on the table for us. You often see threesomes in porn. NFW that will happen in my marriage... EVER. And there are often girl-girl scenes. Again, NFW. The day my husband requests I have sex with another woman is the day his bags are packed and he leaves. Same with a suggestion of threesomes or swinging. Get it? Just because a woman in a porn flick does something, it does NOT automatically translate to RL!
> 
> _Posted via *Topify* on Android_




Mace was just making an observation...why the anger?:scratchhead: This thread is about Bj's and only them.


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

over20 said:


> Mace was just making an observation...why the anger?:scratchhead: This thread is about Bj's and only them.


Wow...where do you get that I'm angry? Mace was just making an observation? Funny...so was I. Observation: Life isn't a porn flick. Observation: Not every woman can get past the gag reflex, just because a porn star does. 

Funny how my observations are called anger, yet someone makes an opposing observation and it's perfectly alright.... Interesting...


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## mace85 (Mar 12, 2012)

Maricha75 said:


> Wow...where do you get that I'm angry? Mace was just making an observation? Funny...so was I. Observation: Life isn't a porn flick. Observation: Not every woman can get past the gag reflex, just because a porn star does.
> 
> Funny how my observations are called anger, yet someone makes an opposing observation and it's perfectly alright.... Interesting...


I wasn't suggesting that wives should be like porn actresses. I was making an observation. 

Let me put it this way. Let's say you and I sit down to do a study on the sensitivity of gag reflexes among women. We need 50 test subjects. We need women who regularly give head. We need women that do it regularly, and over the course of a few years. We need women who have given head to multiple men of different penis "profiles". And as an added bonus, we would like women who have video evidence documenting them giving head. 

What better sample set is there then porn actresses? That was my point.


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## kilgore (Dec 14, 2012)

Catherine602 said:


> The porn actresses discovered a way - lots of money.
> 
> There are thousands of male porn actors who are larger than average. Should women expect their partners to be that large? Selection bias. Porn actresses who have limited opening don't make it past the audition. Selection bias.
> 
> Porn has a reality all it's own. Nothing to do with RL or what woman can be expected to be able to do. It's better to give up porn viewing. Your expectations are being influenced by what you see porn actresses doing. You are not using reason to detect the fallacy in that.


Agreed - what you see in porn should not be evidence for anything at all


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## kilgore (Dec 14, 2012)

agreed. you're not going to get anywhere by telling your wife she needs to be more like other women or porn stars.

keep it up and she might tell you that you need to be hung more like a porn star (though that might make this particular problem worse).


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## doubletrouble (Apr 23, 2013)

WorkingOnMe said:


> No intercourse in a 6 year affair? Lololololol!!!!! Ya cause guys stick around that long for the great conversation all the time.


C'mon, WOM, Playboy is all about the great articles!


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

kilgore said:


> agreed. you're not going to get anywhere by telling your wife she needs to be more like other women or porn stars.
> 
> keep it up and she might tell you that you need to be hung more like a porn star (though that might make this particular problem worse).


Some of us are. Porn is like the NBA of c0cks. With the largest guys being akin to the 7'2" centers.

Some of us have a good height in the NBA of c0cks...


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## mace85 (Mar 12, 2012)

Catherine602 said:


> The point I'm trying to make is that there are many perfectly reasonable things you can try in order to overcome sensible gag reflex or limited opening. Some really good ones have been suggested up-stream. Yet you keep coming back to what prom actresses or other women do.
> 
> It would be more productive to pay attention to what the woman you are with can do. Then slowly ramp things up. When I feel safe and cared for I am willing to get out of my comfort zone. I know my husband has got my back. Maybe he has some porn standard he is looking for. I'll never know because he keep it under wraps. I never feel like he is pushing me into a preassembled box.
> 
> ...



You are completely missing my point. And I NEVER said I compare my wife to a porn actress.


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## mace85 (Mar 12, 2012)

kilgore said:


> agreed. you're not going to get anywhere by telling your wife she needs to be more like other women or porn stars.
> 
> keep it up and she might tell you that you need to be hung more like a porn star (though that might make this particular problem worse).



Again. Missing my point all together. But I guess it is easier for people to just pigeon hole any poster who mentions porn into the
"A-hole guy with unrealistic expectations" category. 

All I am saying is there is a way to overcome the gag reflex issue. We have photographic evidence of this. I in no way suggested that the OP's wife should immediately start taking his junk until she bottoms out. I am not saying he should pull up a porn actresses work and show it to his wife. 


ALL I am doing is clarifying another posters point that her complaint has a solution. I could have said other "plain regular people" overcame this issue as well. But I said that from an observational point that porn actresses are easier to observe doing this because they willingly do it in front of a camera. 

Go ahead and talk to your girlfriends and say " I have a problem with my gag reflex when I give head". And if she tells you that she found a way to get over that issue, ask her if you can come over and watch her blow her husband, so you can see if she actually tackled that problem. I bet she will say no. That was my only point. 

But you keep thinking I want my wife to more resemble a porn actress if that's easier for the fragile minds here. 

At no point did I mention my wife, nor my personal feelings towards her ability to handle my **** in her mouth. Which is just fine by the way. 

Get over yourselves. Stop finding drama where there is none.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

mace85 said:


> You are completely missing my point. And I NEVER said I compare my wife to a porn actress.


All or not even most women in porn can "deep throat".

There are a couple who can, and several of the guys are physically too large to be deepthroated, but even deepthroating a reasonable size **** takes skill and practice that many of them do not have.


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## mace85 (Mar 12, 2012)

treyvion said:


> All or not even most women in porn can "deep throat".
> 
> 
> 
> There are a couple who can, and several of the guys are physically too large to be deepthroated, but even deepthroating a reasonable size **** takes skill and practice that many of them do not have.



I don't believe the issue was deep throat play. I believe it was no blowjobs at a because of a gag reflex issue.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

mace85 said:


> I don't believe the issue was deep throat play. I believe it was no blowjobs at a because of a gag reflex issue.


The "could not have an object like a penis in the mouth" style gagging was new to me. I knew some mentally just saw it as a submission and could not force themself to do it. But never knew that it would gag them.

I do accept most women will not sword swallow and I'm ok with it.


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## Catherine602 (Oct 14, 2010)

mace85 said:


> Again. Missing my point all together. But I guess it is easier for people to just pigeon hole any poster who mentions porn into the
> "A-hole guy with unrealistic expectations" category.
> 
> All I am saying is there is a way to overcome the gag reflex issue. We have photographic evidence of this. I in no way suggested that the OP's wife should immediately start taking his junk until she bottoms out. I am not saying he should pull up a porn actresses work and show it to his wife.
> ...


My point is that porn has noting to do with real life. Porn is not photographic evidence of anything IRL. Porn actresses do many things in front of the camera because they want to appeal to their audience. It's not because they've overcome a sensitive gag reflex. You don't understand selection bias. Porn selects out for woman who don't have a sensitive gag reflex. Women with it elect not to select an job category that requires them to confront something that they can't do. 

Anyway, let's say there are woman who overcome a sensitive gag reflex for a lot of money. Why do you think women IRL need to work on their gag reflex? Porn has nothing to do with RL and women don't have to do things like porn actresses. If they have a sensitive gag reflex, they have to decide if they want to work at it. They can decide if they want to use porn as photographic evidence. Your wife may not have the problem but you are still wrong. 

Lastly, how do you know that anyone can overcome a sensitive gag reflex IRL. Have you watched an instructional video of an actress overcoming a sensitive gag reflex? That would be photographic evidence. it? See if you can suppress your normal gag and post your method. It would help to prove your point. If you can't do that then don't assume anyone can or even should. 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## mace85 (Mar 12, 2012)

Catherine602 said:


> My point is that porn has noting to do with real life. Porn is not photographic evidence of anything IRL. Porn actresses do many things in front of the camera because they want to appeal to their audience. It's not because they've overcome a sensitive gag reflex. You don't understand selection bias. Porn selects out for woman who don't have a sensitive gag reflex. Women with it elect not to select an job category that requires them to confront something that they can't do.
> 
> Anyway, let's say there are woman who overcome a sensitive gag reflex for a lot of money. Why do you think women IRL need to work on their gag reflex? Porn has nothing to do with RL and women don't have to do things like porn actresses. If they have a sensitive gag reflex, they have to decide if they want to work at it. They can decide if they want to use porn as photographic evidence. Your wife may not have the problem but you are still wrong.
> 
> ...



I have noticed a theme in your postings here. The man is wrong every single time, and the women is simply misunderstood and should be given a wide berth. I see no point to continue this discussion. 

I am sorry. Your correct. Porn is evil in every single way. I will let myself out....


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

Mace, your point seems to be that any/everyone who has a problem with their gag reflex can get over it because porn stars manage to do so. What some of us are trying to get across is that not all of us CAN get over the gag reflex. Even trying different things, it's still there, still an issue. As an example, my husband and myself. Just before it goes into my mouth, my throat closes up. I have to mentally detach myself at that moment in order to continue. Part of the reason, I think, is that he tastes bitter. Nothing, I repeat, NOTHING, has been able to counteract the taste. None of the dietary changes suggested, which supposedly will make it sweeter (or less bitter, anyway) have helped at all. No flavored lubes, no throat lozenges, nothing. But, I do it because he likes it. I don't do it as often as he would like, however. 

Anyway, my point is that some women CANNOT get past it, no matter what they try. And using porn stars as a "sample" on how to get past it isn't going to work for everyone. 

*As a side note to your suggested example on watching video of women (likely porn actresses) giving blow jobs, sorry, you would have to watch alone. I would refuse, as I don't watch that kind of thing.

_Posted via *Topify* on Android_


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

Maricha75 said:


> Mace, your point seems to be that any/everyone who has a problem with their gag reflex can get over it because porn stars manage to do so. What some of us are trying to get across is that not all of us CAN get over the gag reflex. Even trying different things, it's still there, still an issue. As an example, my husband and myself. Just before it goes into my mouth, my throat closes up. I have to mentally detach myself at that moment in order to continue. Part of the reason, I think, is that he tastes bitter. Nothing, I repeat, NOTHING, has been able to counteract the taste. None of the dietary changes suggested, which supposedly will make it sweeter (or less bitter, anyway) have helped at all. No flavored lubes, no throat lozenges, nothing. But, I do it because he likes it. I don't do it as often as he would like, however.
> 
> Anyway, my point is that some women CANNOT get past it, no matter what they try. And using porn stars as a "sample" on how to get past it isn't going to work for everyone.
> 
> ...


Porn stars can feel the same way you describe. That they cannot get past it to like it. But for the show they WILL perform the act and collect the money. 

They will act like they enjoy it and put on a good act, but it may be terrible to them the entire time just like you said it could be for some.


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

treyvion said:


> Maricha75 said:
> 
> 
> > Mace, your point seems to be that any/everyone who has a problem with their gag reflex can get over it because porn stars manage to do so. What some of us are trying to get across is that not all of us CAN get over the gag reflex. Even trying different things, it's still there, still an issue. As an example, my husband and myself. Just before it goes into my mouth, my throat closes up. I have to mentally detach myself at that moment in order to continue. Part of the reason, I think, is that he tastes bitter. Nothing, I repeat, NOTHING, has been able to counteract the taste. None of the dietary changes suggested, which supposedly will make it sweeter (or less bitter, anyway) have helped at all. No flavored lubes, no throat lozenges, nothing. But, I do it because he likes it. I don't do it as often as he would like, however.
> ...


Which brings us back to Catherine's point (I think it was Catherine?) : they are motivated by money. And, if a man wants his wife to be motivated the way a porn star is... treat her like one. See how that works out.

_Posted via *Topify* on Android_


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## mace85 (Mar 12, 2012)

Maricha75 said:


> Which brings us back to Catherine's point (I think it was Catherine?) : they are motivated by money. And, if a man wants his wife to be motivated the way a porn star is... treat her like one. See how that works out.
> 
> _Posted via *Topify* on Android_


Never said all women can get over it. Never spoke in absolutes. I simply suggested some can get over it, there must be a way that works for some. I never spoke in absolutes. 

Never even suggested to treat a wife like a porn star never suggested watching porn together. Again, taken out of context. 

It has occurred to me through these forums that the mere mention of pornography in a non-negative fashion is a social death sentence here. 

For Pete's sake it wasn't even my point originally. I was just trying to clarify what someone else had said. But I guess it's just more fun to sit behind a keyboard and label all the *******s out there. 

Have a great day.....


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## stoney1215 (Jun 18, 2012)

Hope1964 said:


> OMG blow jobs are not every mans god given right you know. Maybe try being a little sensitive to your wife's feelings about it? Using terms like 'not pulling her weight' and 'help her step up to the plate' make you sound like an a$$, sorry to say.




They may not be a God given right but that does not mean we are not allowed to want them or ask for them or voice our displeasure if we do not get them. We have very limited options. We can either let our wife know , cheat , or go without. Cheating is not the answer for either partner. That leaves voicing our displeasure or going without. It does not make a guy look like an ass for saying he wants to be sexually satisfied by his wife. If anyone looks like an ass it is the person that does not want to please their partner sexually. 

If a woman does not want to give her husband head he is supposed to just say ok and be content with never getting it. But if a man does not want to give his wife what she wants i.e. emotional support , and financial support is she supposed to be ok with that ? 

Oral sex is and has been for quite a while a standard part of sex. Especially for guys. If a woman does not want to do it She should be honest right from the beginning and tell the guy she is not going to do it and he has to be ok with that. And she can not be upset or surprised when the guy isn't interested in her any more
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Wolfman1968 (Jun 9, 2011)

To the original poster, Scots:

Additional information would be helpful here, in order to clarify your SPECIFIC situation.

- Was BJ something that she USED to do, even before marriage, and no longer wants to? (Bait and switch, or no longer wants to make the effort?)

- Has she actually had aome medical issue here that could impact it? (TMJ, etc.)

- Is there some correlation with your demands for this with your discovery of her cheating? Has she attempted to show her desire for you/remorse in other enthusiastic ways?

I am inclined to be skeptical about any claims to no PIV or oral sex over a 6 year affair, and her trickle truth does not sound encouraging at all. I therefore suspect there is a high likelihood that her attitude here (or claims to be unable to perform) may in some way be tied in with her affair.


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## YinPrincess (Jul 31, 2011)

Honestly? sound like excuses to me. seems like she doesn't like it for whatever reason - which may or may not be valid. I hate the "gag reflex" excuse - she seems to swallow food ok? Has she been diagnosed with any condition?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Big Mama (Mar 24, 2014)

She might be able to swallow food but the bites are mot likely not the size of a polish sausage and and 6 inches long (or more) either. 

I have a sensitive gag reflex and have a hard time taking a bight of a hamburger. I have to take nibbles much of the time. I have a hard time brushing my teeth. On a good day I can use a childs toothbrush and on a bad day I use those disposable toothbrushes. They are tiny. the dentist says what ever it takes to brush your teeth is fine. When I have dental work done they spray my whole mouth and throat with something like Chlorseptic so I don't have gag issues during something as simple as cleanings.


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## kilgore (Dec 14, 2012)

i have never caused a woman to gag. one benefit to a short, skinny willy


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

kilgore said:


> i have never caused a woman to gag. one benefit to a short, skinny willy


See, now this post shows how you can put a positive spin on just about anything.


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## kilgore (Dec 14, 2012)

lenzi said:


> See, now this post shows how you can put a positive spin on just about anything.


i'm just saying...there are benefits. that is one of them


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

kilgore said:


> i'm just saying...there are benefits. that is one of them


Name one more.


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## kilgore (Dec 14, 2012)

lenzi said:


> Name one more.


tight whities are not uncomfortable
you don't have to worry about people staring at your bulge
it's a good conversation piece

and so many more


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

kilgore said:


> tight whities are not uncomfortable
> you don't have to worry about people staring at your bulge
> it's a good conversation piece
> 
> and so many more


Name two more.


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## kilgore (Dec 14, 2012)

lenzi said:


> Name two more.


less painful for having sex with spouse post-pregnancy
less threatening for anal sex (i'm told)


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

Name 10 more.


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## Personal (Jan 16, 2014)

lenzi said:


> Name 10 more.


You can be quite relentless at times, LOL.

I am impressed.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

lenzi said:


> Name one more.


Women who have vaginal soreness and discomfort with others may try him, and also those who want to try anal may prefer a shorter and skinnier one for the first time.


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## omgitselaine (Sep 5, 2013)

treyvion said:


> Women who have vaginal soreness and discomfort with others may try him, and also those who want to try anal may prefer a shorter and skinnier one for the first time.


Not for nothing but I've never ...... ever once complained about " vaginal soreness " because he was too big ahem ahem  Nope not a problem at all


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

YinPrincess said:


> Honestly? sound like excuses to me. seems like she doesn't like it for whatever reason - which may or may not be valid. *I hate the "gag reflex" excuse* - she seems to swallow food ok? Has she been diagnosed with any condition?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Hate it all you like, Yin. It's legitimate. I do gag when I do it. I have no issue swallowing food. I gag no matter how clean he is. And he is "average" size. You cannot equate swallowing food with giving a bj, Yin. I don't know about you, but I don't put the amount of food into my mouth that is equal to the size of my husband's penis.









_Posted via *Topify* on Android_


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## where_are_we (May 24, 2013)

This makes me wonder: How much of the "gagging" for some people could be related to the mindset? I have gagged a time or two from seeing something disgusting (not sex related) and nothing was even in my mouth.

But I have no problem with the act being discussed here, no matter the size or how much force, depth, or speed he uses. 

I know we are all different. I just find it interesting that the ladies get mad if the man doesn't want to go down on them, but if she doesn't want to blow him well "she shouldn't have to if she finds it disgusting." OR, it's not your given right to have this act. Well maybe the same rational could be used in the other direction. Just something to think about.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

omgitselaine said:


> Not for nothing but I've never ...... ever once complained about " vaginal soreness " because he was too big ahem ahem  Nope not a problem at all


Cool. That's a nice problem to not have.  Sometimes they get sore.


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## CuddleBug (Nov 26, 2012)

Mrs.CuddleBug never gags either.

Reason being, she has complete control of the BJ, how much tongue she uses and how deep in her mouth I go. She usually tries to get more of me in her mouth but not to gagging.

Then she uses her hand to masturbate me at the same time.

Has her favorite drink immediately after finishing me off and swallowing.

It work for us.


Why not only take his tip in your mouth? Why not only use your tongue up, down and around him, but not in your mouth? No gag reflex.


My wifee only orgasms from oral and her small vib I bought her. So using my tongue and she uses the vib on her, at the same time, killer orgasm, but that's when she is really in the mood, which is usually never, only what I call normal sex and not she wants a killer orgasm sex.


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## Giro flee (Mar 12, 2013)

It never ceases to amaze me that people cannot accept that everybody is different. Anatomy varies across our species. I have a very sensitive gag reflex, I've been working at oral for my husband for over twenty years. I've read all the books, tried all of the sprays, I still gag if an entire penis is thrust more than two inches into my mouth and every single time ejaculate hits the back of my mouth. 

I am willing to do a combo of hands and mouth oral for my H, I'm even willing to let him finish in my mouth as long as I don't have a full stomach. A few gags aren't going to kill me. The only reason I do this, is my H is fabulous, kind, compassionate, and has absolutely told me I don't need to do this for him. I want to do this for him because I know men just love oral sex, I've seen the look of pleasure on H's face. I can wish that PIV were just as great but obviously it's not or there wouldn't be so much hysteria over this. 

We usually do oral as a warm up, with a full bj only happening once a month or so. I hate oral on myself so there is no expectation by me for reciprocation.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

Lila said:


> Personally, I'd rather go without oral sex than force a guy who dry heaves or gags to go down on me.


Like it's torture.


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## where_are_we (May 24, 2013)

Catherine602 said:


> The problem is that 70% of women orgasm from clitoral stimulation only. If that is the case for his wife, then he will need to find another way to bring her to orgasm. Otherwise, she will have no orgasms at all.


Yes, I have heard of this stat as well. But a mouth is not the only way to provide clitoral stimulation. This goes for male and female obviously. 

And again, everyone is different. I am not in the "norm." There are easier ways to make me orgasm and they are much more stronger than just clitoral (especially via a mouth).


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## Catherine602 (Oct 14, 2010)

Giro flee said:


> It never ceases to amaze me that people cannot accept that everybody is different. Anatomy varies across our species. I have a very sensitive gag reflex, I've been working at oral for my husband for over twenty years. I've read all the books, tried all of the sprays, I still gag if an entire penis is thrust more than two inches into my mouth and every single time ejaculate hits the back of my mouth.
> 
> I am willing to do a combo of hands and mouth oral for my H, I'm even willing to let him finish in my mouth as long as I don't have a full stomach. A few gags aren't going to kill me. The only reason I do this, is my H is fabulous, kind, compassionate, and has absolutely told me I don't need to do this for him. I want to do this for him because I know men just love oral sex, I've seen the look of pleasure on H's face. I can wish that PIV were just as great but obviously it's not or there wouldn't be so much hysteria over this.
> 
> We usually do oral as a warm up, with a full bj only happening once a month or so. I hate oral on myself so there is no expectation by me for reciprocation.


:iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree:


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## over20 (Nov 15, 2013)

Lila said:


> Personally, I'd rather go without oral sex than force a guy who dry heaves or gags to go down on me.[/QUOTE
> 
> Most men would not gag or produce dry heaves when giving oral to a woman.....I will never understand this aversion to performing oral on a man/husband.....I have been giving my husband/at the time boyfriend oral since I was 17 and him 18..I never had an issue...it just comes with loving and accepting my DH's sexuality....Oh and I love it too.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

over20 said:


> Lila said:
> 
> 
> > Personally, I'd rather go without oral sex than force a guy who dry heaves or gags to go down on me.[/QUOTE
> ...


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## Scotsirish (Feb 14, 2014)

Update: over the last couple of weeks my wife is actually initiating oral - I see this as a big step for her. I am pleased. She is trying to meet my desire.

I know she likes receiving it, and oral sex was a big part of her affair I think, even though she said she never gave him oral (riiiiiiight - like I really believe that).

I know comparisons are odious, but I had a gf who LOVED giving head, and she could deep throat with the best of them. I've never told wife that. Won't either. So to be truthful, the bar was set high for her. Being beta for a long time, I didn't challenge her to really try.


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