# separated 4 months



## 265105 (Oct 30, 2016)

Deleted because this site is ****ing worthless






please enjoy this video of Alex Lifeson


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## jsmart (Mar 14, 2015)

set some self improvement goals for yourself that you can focus your mind on. These will help you to not obsess over this woman. I know that her being there during your divorce had an impact on you but you repaid the debt by being there during her ordeal with MS. Now that she’s healthier, she’s rather explore the singles scene, than be with a guy with health issues. That’s her prerogative.
You should stop trying to nice her back. All it does is push her further away. If being in that area is making you miserable, you should move. With no ties, you have the chance to move to a place that you prefer and can start over.


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## thunderchad (12 mo ago)

She doesn't like you and doesn't want a relationship with you. Move on. Chasing her endlessly has gotten you nowhere and it will never get you anywhere.

Just stop talking to her and find someone who actually wants to be with you.


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## thunderchad (12 mo ago)

carterbeauford said:


> She said she didn't want a relationship


You can always add "with you" to these statements.


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## Benbutton (Oct 3, 2019)

It would serve you well to learn the indirect language of the female species. They always tell you what they want if you listen carefully enough. Oh, and actions always trump words.


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## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

carterbeauford said:


> I love this woman more than I can put into words


No, you don't. what actually is: YOU being a mess that any woman in her right mind would stay away from. Women are attracted to strong, confident, assertive males that show dependability and give a sense of security, traits that you have not showed at all in your relationship with her. What I see is a man that feels so insecure of himself that he's clinging to the proverbial straw in order to survive.

If you'd have any sense of propriety and self respect you would leave her alone and move on. You actually are being pathetic, taking no for an answer. If you keep it up what you're going to eventually get is a restraining on you.

You know she's dating and you still want to try to get together with her? dude, where's you dignity? You say that you're working in being a new person, lord, from where I stand that new person is missing quite a few things still to become a whole.


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## 265105 (Oct 30, 2016)

Deleted because this site is ****ing worthless






please enjoy this video of Alex Lifeson


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## 265105 (Oct 30, 2016)

Deleted because this site is ****ing worthless






please enjoy this video of Alex Lifeson


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## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

Let me spell it out. She hasn’t been successful at replacing you so likely you’re still her Plan B — just in case. Maybe she can’t sustain a long-term relationship in any event. I think you’ll take her back, if she decides that’s what she wants, and I think this pattern will repeat because it’s who she is. That’s it.


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## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

carterbeauford said:


> I guess what I am wondering is the significance of the fact she still cares.


I guess we all deserved what we allow in our life, and you are reaping what you deserve.


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## 265105 (Oct 30, 2016)

Openminded said:


> Let me spell it out. She hasn’t been successful at replacing you so likely you’re still her Plan B — just in case. Maybe she can’t sustain a long-term relationship in any event. I think you’ll take her back, if she decides that’s what she wants, and I think this pattern will repeat because it’s who she is. That’s it.


It takes a special person to love her but the reward was always worth the effort. She was married 10 years and has trust issues because of cheating. Every other guy lasted a month and I lasted 26 months because I love her.

I fell hard because of the way she treats her kids. I fell hard for her kids. You can form some strong bonds when you're going through a divorce. Our kids played together. My son wonders where his friends went. They're a beautiful family and I love them as one. Finally being in a place where I was open to being a blended family and then losing it is the real loss here.

This would all make more sense if you could see this girl. Dark haired dark eyed Italian girl stole my soul. Two little dark eyed Italian kids to match.


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## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

carterbeauford said:


> It takes a special person to love her


Yes, they are called "emotionally stunted" or "emotionally challenged" to use a politically correct term.


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## 265105 (Oct 30, 2016)

I


Rob_1 said:


> Yes, they are called "emotionally stunted" or "emotionally challenged" to use a politically correct term.


I'd say emotionally strong after surviving divorce, someone trying to terminate my parenting rights and disabling nerve pain all at the same time.

She's insecure but a strong person too.


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

You may win this one....in the end.
Ouch.

I hope she eases back into your life. 

Believe others, here when they tell you she is looking for someone better.

Someone better than all she has met before.

Get mentally and physically better, getting fit and friendly is key.

And stay there, at that stage.

For you and you only, being Plan B is OK.

And, it is..for you, hopefully for her too.

You have already grown on her, that is evident.

For you to win, she has to give up on replacing you.
And, she is frantically trying.

Think about that.



_Are Dee-_


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## 265105 (Oct 30, 2016)

SunCMars said:


> Believe others, here when they tell you she is looking for someone better.


I agree but she isn't going to find them on Bumble. Her options are limited in her situation. They only want sex and it's the best they'll ever have. 

There have been a series of bizarre coincidences that I took as a sign to never give up, and believe me, I've been close. Or maybe I've lost my mind.

Neil Peart wrote a book after suffering tremendous personal loss and said if you love someone enough they have to love you back, right?


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## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

carterbeauford said:


> It takes a special person to love her but the reward was always worth the effort. She was married 10 years and has trust issues because of cheating. Every other guy lasted a month and I lasted 26 months because I love her.
> 
> I fell hard because of the way she treats her kids. I fell hard for her kids. You can form some strong bonds when you're going through a divorce. Our kids played together. My son wonders where his friends went. They're a beautiful family and I love them as one. Finally being in a place where I was open to being a blended family and then losing it is the real loss here.
> 
> This would all make more sense if you could see this girl. Dark haired dark eyed Italian girl stole my soul. Two little dark eyed Italian kids to match.


I’m a female so, no, it wouldn’t all make sense if I could see her because I’m not hung up on how people look — I care much more how they act. But I do think she’ll be back and you’ll welcome her with open arms before it all repeats again so I’ll just say good luck.


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## 265105 (Oct 30, 2016)

Openminded said:


> I’m a female so, no, it wouldn’t all make sense if I could see her because I’m not hung up on how people look — I care much more how they act. But I do think she’ll be back and you’ll welcome her with open arms before it all repeats again so I’ll just say good luck.


She has character and inner beauty to match the outer beauty. She's a very loving woman but her divorce kept her from letting me in. 

We had talked about building something before my nerve pain and depression got bad.

I mean she stayed 10 years with her husband and has told other guys she's ready to settle down.


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## Marc878 (Aug 26, 2015)

You can’t drop the hopium pipe so you’ll linger. It’s your choice.


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## Rob_1 (Sep 8, 2017)

Jesus dude, if even a woman with MS is cutting you off, and obviously throwing you crumps in order to keep you dangling around in the eventuality she can't find a more suitable candidate then, that clearly paints a picture of how weak and pathetic you must come across to her or any other woman by that same token. You "fixation" on her isn't just creepy, it borders into illogical wants and rationalizations, as to why she "must" be with you. It's scary. It tells a lot about your mental state. It's very easy for "some" men to just go into the deep end with your type of fixation and commit an act of aggression towards a woman. Believe me when I tell you that you are sounding very creepy with your rationalizations.



carterbeauford said:


> She has character and inner beauty to match the outer beauty. She's a very loving woman but her divorce kept her from letting me in.


The above is an example of your justifications. Whether the above is true or not, is not your call nor your place to insist upon her after she told you: 



carterbeauford said:


> she said I can't do this anymore


Please, have the dignity, courtesy, and the sense of propriety the abide by her wishes.


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

carterbeauford said:


> Neil Peart wrote a book after suffering tremendous personal loss and said *if you love someone enough they have to love you back, right?*


I hope, for your sake.

Sometimes, getting seconds, those cool, maybe guilty scraps, are better than going totally hungry.

In that scenario, you will get 3/4's of what you want.
Her full body and half of her mind.

In truth, it is a lady's lips you kiss, often not, that hidden _50 shades of gray_ matter.

Know, that her hips may rise to meet you, but her mind is under another pelvis.

Under, another Elvis.




_The Typist-_


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## 265105 (Oct 30, 2016)

Rob_1 said:


> It's very easy for "some" men to just go into the deep end with your type of fixation and commit an act of aggression towards a woman.


one of my closest friends was a domestic violence victim so this is highly unlikely. 

she will consider reconciliation in part because she knows I don't hit women or kids. 

save the theatrics, I just miss someone I really love. give me a break.


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