# does an emotional affair mean divorce?



## ccc16 (Mar 18, 2013)

i have been married 12 years, we have 2 children. Warning: this will sound like i am bashing my husband to excuse myself, im not, just trying to get the facts out. I know how wrong I am. My husband is 15 years older than I am. Because of the age difference (I believe) he can be very insecure and controlling (nothing physical more manipulative) he also very critical of myself and others and that gives him a very negative demeanor overall. I have been complaining of this for years, not only does he not change he explains why what he does is actually right. For the past two months i have been involved in an emotional affair with an ex. 2 weeks ago, i told my husband I was unhappy and need out. Since then he has attempted some changes but i really just want him to accept it and move on. He is a good looking guy with a good job and he does mean well. He loves our children. I know there are a million goo things about him but i feel empty. I do feel extremely bad that this is hurting him but is that a reason to keep a marriage going. I feel like it would be better to free him now so he can find someone else. I am also afraid that i am so caught up in the emotional affair that i cant see straight. I am trying to sort out in my head if i had the emotional affair because of my marriage or if the marriage seems worse because i see an alternative????? as a side note, i am the child of addicts and took care of my brother from a young age, moved out took him with me, completed college, got pregnant VERY early in the relationship just to find out 7 months in that he was an addict. I struggles through his addiction with him for the first 7 years of our marriage and now that we are on a even keel I wonder if i ever even made a decision to be here? feeling like a crappy person - thanks for any insight/advice


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