# Dealing with grief



## JS2

I asked my husband for a divorce a few months ago and at the beginning I was feeling relieved and empowered, but I think the grief is finally settling in. We are currently still living in the same home but living separate lives. I’m starting to feel extremely lonely and I’m scared of what my life will look like once I’m moved out and completely alone. COVID has made it especially difficult to express myself socially and get my needs met through my other relationships. Any words of wisdom for a newly separated woman?


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## Diana7

IT will be best if you stop living together so you can both begin to move on and heal. I know several couples who stayed living in the same house while separated and it never works.


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## JS2

Diana7 said:


> IT will be best if you stop living together so you can both begin to move on and heal. I know several couples who stayed living in the same house while separated and it never works.


Thank you. I am working on moving out ASAP.


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## sokillme

JS2 said:


> I asked my husband for a divorce a few months ago and at the beginning I was feeling relieved and empowered, but I think the grief is finally settling in. We are currently still living in the same home but living separate lives. I’m starting to feel extremely lonely and I’m scared of what my life will look like once I’m moved out and completely alone. COVID has made it especially difficult to express myself socially and get my needs met through my other relationships. Any words of wisdom for a newly separated woman?


Well this isn't unusual. You were going to have to feel this way. Try to accept it and not worry that there is something wrong. Just feel it. You spent a lot of time with this man, you committed part of your life. Change is hard for everyone. 

It's also normal to be scared. I think everyone is when there is change like this. Even if they are excited.

The thing with being lonely is you were lonely in your marriage too right? The difference is you can now be proactive. That will be the key, if you stay home all the time then you will be lonely but if you get out there and find things to do, you can help to alleviate some of that, you may even find someone new if you need that. The point is you now have agency in your loneliness and that was the point right? 

Courage my friend. Remember courage is not about not being afraid it's about being afraid and still moving forward. Nothing really good in life comes without risk. 

You are going to be OK. One day at at time.


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