# do you know where your going?



## As'laDain (Nov 27, 2011)

five years ago i decided that i couldnt stay infantry forever. so, i made a plan. i wanted to have a house and a steady source of income before i got out, and i wanted to have some skills that i could market outside of the army. 

well, today, i am well on my way to having exactly what i want. i speak four languages(learning a fifth) and i am about to buy a house. ill pay for the house, completely, before i get out of the army. and ill have a source of income set up so that when i finally get out, i will have a paid off house and a good paying job. by the time i am retirement age, ill be able to do anything i want. and by retirement age, i mean from the army. by the time im 42, ill have no debt, a house, and a good income. 

i know it sounds like im counting my chickens before they hatch, but i wouldnt have even made it this far unless i planned it out. i know what i want and i have the patience to work for it. so, i have no doubt that i will accomplish it. 

so i have a question for all you men out there... where are you going to be in five years? ten years? do you know? are you today where you decided you wanted to be five years ago?


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## Convection (Apr 20, 2013)

As'laDain said:


> so i have a question for all you men out there... where are you going to be in five years? ten years? do you know? are you today where you decided you wanted to be five years ago?


That's actually four questions, Chuckles. 

I think it is good to have goals and to have a vision/plan for the future. It's also dangerous to be beholden to it to the point you stress or start worrying when things aren't going according to "the plan." I watched my father do a bit of that and had to stretch to break myself of the habit.

Five years ago, I planned that by today I would be retired from the military and living with Lady Convection some acreage in the countryside, preferably in rural New England. I got the first two parts right but ended up in Arizona. I guess I could be upset that the plan didn't pan out but sometimes you just have to float on fate's tide and see what happens.

Do I have a concrete vision where I will be in five or ten years? Nah, I have a loose plan. As'la, you know as well as I do that no plan survives first contact with the enemy - the "enemy" in this case being living your life.

I don't know where I will be in five or ten years. I'm not even sure where I will be in five or ten days. But I'm sure I'll have fun figuring it out.


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## As'laDain (Nov 27, 2011)

Convection said:


> That's actually four questions, Chuckles.
> 
> I think it is good to have goals and to have a vision/plan for the future. It's also dangerous to be beholden to it to the point you stress or start worrying when things aren't going according to "the plan." I watched my father do a bit of that and had to stretch to break myself of the habit.
> 
> ...


my father never had much of a plan at all. i have seen so many people over the last ten years drift on in life without anything at all to show for the last decade. 

the kind of planning im talking about is more like commanders intent. as long as i get where i want to go, the details dont matter. im sure you could find a way to get to new england if it was that important to you. but im willing to bet that the location of your retirement wasnt as important as the person you would spend it with. 

i dont even care where i retire, just as long as me and mine are well taken care of. im not about to spend ten years in the army and then get out without anything lined up. i have seen so many of my peers do that, and they are pretty much all struggling. thats not for me. i have an end state goal and a plan to get there. and a whole lot of contingency plans too lol.


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## OptimisticPessimist (Jul 26, 2010)

I know at some point I will be on a motorcycle headed to South America; I dont want to wait until Im 65 to try it. I know that Ill be an electrical engineer as im about done, but ill do contract labor instead of a formal job. 

I save nothing beyond for short term goals, and I aim to live without debt. Sometimes I have debt and sometimes I have savings; it is the ebb and flow of me interfacing with this world I guess.

I have no aspirations to own a house. I will own an F350 and a large pull trailer and some land with amenities somewhere. I will either be "home" or "on the road." I will work for a few years, then not work and travel. Rinse, repeat.

I dont care about retirement (you have a sweet deal though) and I wont save a scent for it because with my familial history of cancer, Ill never make it there anyways. If I do by some miracle, I guess Ill work or checkout early.

I dont care about the societal goals of safety or "having my corner in the world"- I aim to feel every high and every low as intensely as is sane the short time I am on this planet.

Should I have children, my plan will obviously completely change because then my life will no longer be primarily about me. It'd be nice, but I need to meet the right woman first.


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## ReformedHubby (Jan 9, 2013)

Great post As'la. We talk a lot on here about being fit and dressing well, and other "alpha" attributes. But we don't talk about planning. A man without a plan is basically just wandering about in life. This is fine for a young man but at some point you need to get serious. I don't think it matters what exactly the plan is, but you certainly can't lead if you don't know where you're going. 

I would prefer that my daughter not marry a free spirited type, those guys are fun, but I think a man that has a roadmap of where he wants to go makes much better husband material.


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## Thor (Oct 31, 2011)

I had plans but the rest of the universe had different ideas. So I have to adjust my plans to fit reality, and adjust my expectations, too.


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

I know where I'm going, and I have plans - and contingency plans. However, life has thrown many twists and turns, and I've had to adapt and change accordingly. Some have caused me to change direction or cancel some ideas, some have merely been setbacks, and some have helped me achieve particular goals sooner than anticipated. Having control over your life is an illusion, but you can still have and achieve goals much of the time.

Two basic precautions to which I've always given priority have helped: having good health insurance has several times prevented the death or disability of loved ones, and prevented bankruptcy; saving adequately for the future (a year of emergency funds) and retirement means I have the resources for me and my wife to live well indefinitely (barring a meltdown of the entire financial system).


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## Toshiba2020 (Mar 1, 2012)

Its always good to have plans.

The only debt i have right now is my home and I wanted to have it paid off by 30 but realistically 35 is do-able, 40 would be a worst case scenario. After that its pretty much just banking money, investing in my portfolio as well as my children's future (i hear kids are expensive)

Planning to retire by 60 at the latest. But would prefer to be done by 50 or at least work less hours. Having watched my parents it was amazing how much they aged from 50-60, their energy and metal sharpness declined much more rapidly than i expected. They are retired and 60+ but just dont seem to have the energy to enjoy it and my grandparents are 80+ and it takes them an entire day just to wake up, shower and make a meal. I would like to be able to retire young enough to enjoy it!



> saving adequately for the future (a year of emergency funds


This is something even at my age ive noticed. it is amazing how many people young and old live above their means, paycheck to paycheck, with a triple digit or less bank account and when the slightest unforeseen expense comes along it financially ruins them, forcing them to take out high interest loans or beg for money from family and friends.


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