# Signing a Postnup for future home properties.



## Laser Shark (Oct 13, 2021)

Sorry about the long post. This has been a weird situation for me.
I've been with my wife for 10 years and we live in a home that her family purchased about 15 years ago. My wife told me that her parents purchased the house (around $60k) for her and had my wife make monthly payments on it for a few years. The house was remodeled. Her parents told her she no longer had to make payments and transferred the title to her once she had paid for most of it. So I've always been told the house is hers. When we were dating, my wife asked me to move in with her. I did and have since always taken care of the house, fixed things, and helped pay for taxes and insurance. I'm in Texas and anything she owned before we married is her personal property. So she definitely owns the house.

My wife and I have been saving money since we married so that we could purchase a better home. We have no debt. We finally have enough for a decent down payment and started searching for a new place. My wife ended up wanting to build a new home which was higher than my original budget. I told her I wasn't comfortable with that at the moment since the down payment would clear out every bit of our savings. I also have a cheap 15 year old car that I'm worried won't last much longer. After arguing about that for a little while, she assured me we would sell her current home and put that into our savings. I agreed and we have been building a home that should be completed very soon.

My wife wants to put the current home up for sale in the next couple weeks. I was told a few days ago that my wife had originally opened a loan with her parents. This loan has still been open with her parents and her parents were going to sign some paperwork to close it and completely hand the home off to my wife. I'm really now sure how all this works. Yesterday, my wife's parents asked her to meet them at their attorney's office to finalize this. My wife asked me to take off work a little early so I could meet her. I didn't figure I would be involved since she's owned the home since before we were together.

We get to the attorney's office and my wife's parents aren't there. The secretary lays down a postnuptial agreement in front of me and asks me to sign it. My wife and I were both surprised by this. The agreement is written poorly and some parts don't make sense to me. It basically states that $100k of the value of the current home is my wife's separate property. If the money is used for any future property, $100k of new property will always be her separate property. The attorney's office told me that this is not binding and my wife and I could rip it up after we leave. That didn't make sense and made me think the office was lying to me. Why would we need to sign this if it wasn't a legal binding document? I asked to being the document home with me. I'm fine with signing something stating the property is hers. I'm just not sure if I should agree that this would apply to any of our future property. Should I ask her to keep the money in a personal savings account and not use it on our new home? Just keep it to herself? This is kind of confusing for me. I guess I need to have a separate attorney check the document out before I sign it.


----------



## jlg07 (Feb 24, 2017)

I would get to a separate attorney to review this -- sounds pretty fishy to my. You wife knew NOTHING about this?
Is SHE ok with this document?



Laser Shark said:


> The attorney's office told me that this is not binding and my wife and I could rip it up after we leave.


Yeah someone there is lying to you. If THEY have the original, it WILL be binding (or if they give it to her parents) -- it won't be "ripped up".

I think your idea of the money being kept in her own account may make sense, but this whole situation sounds screwy.
How is your marriage?


----------



## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

Get some legal advise and have a lawyer look at the prenup.
Seems very odd to me. Either her parents lied to her or she lied to you.

Dont sign anything at this point. Remember you don't need to sign it. If her parents refuse to sign the house to her as they said they would ages ago then let them keep the house and pay for it's running costs. 

Does your wife want you to sign it? 

It would have been nice if her parents had actually turned up to the meeting to explain.


----------



## D0nnivain (Mar 13, 2021)

Go get your own lawyer who knows Texas law.


----------



## Livvie (Jan 20, 2014)

You fixed things, and paid taxes and insurance on a house for 10 plus years, that your wife owns, and she is trying now to pass it off as and keep the whole value as premarital property. Property she owned and lived in for a decade as a _married woman_.

She's trying to cheat the system and laws regarding pre marital property with this post nup. Needs the post nup because without it, it is considered marital property and half yours, probably (check with an attorney!!). It was the marital residence.

I'd be really upset with my wife. She's trying to claim 100k of your new property is hers alone. You're ****ed.

Is she really straight up putting 100k into this new property? If so (and it doesn't sound like that is so) half of that is _probably_ yours by law, check with an attorney!!!

It's all very unmarital of her and designed to screw you over in the event of a divorce.


----------



## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

I would take a copy of that to a separate attorney and hopefully you won't have to spend a lot of money but have that attorney look over it and see if she can make any sense of it. I have trouble believing the wife didn't know that was coming. It may be perfectly okay or something her parents wanted to do.

But don't find anything until you have a attorney look at it and explain everything to him. The attorney may be able to call the other attorney and find out what the original deal was maybe as well. I don't think I would let the attorney you hire turn it into a big drawn-out thing though.


----------



## Laser Shark (Oct 13, 2021)

It would have been nice if her parents showed up or didn't come up with this out of the blue.

My wife acted like it was strange but wants me to sign it because she wants the money from the old house that was promised to her. After weeks of me refusing to build a new home at the price point she wanted, that was the only way she was able to talk me into it.

I checked her text messages to her mother yesterday and didn't see anything strange showing that my wife knew about this.

Our relationship has been a little rocky in the past but has improved over the past couple of years.

I am a little frustrated because I've sank thousands into this house. I've remodeled and replaced flooring, the roof, plumbing, etc. Earlier this year there was a leak in the old galvanized main water line. I discovered it ran under 2 neighbor's homes. I was quoted $15-20k by several places to fix this. I ended up buying parts and tools myself and paid a neighbor to help me dig a ditch. Fixed everything and had to repair 2 neighbor's sidewalks afterwards.

There are always issues with this old house. The hot water heater is having issues today. I'm posting this message as I'm taking it apart. My normal fix isn't working and it looks like it needs replaced. I have some inheritance coming in from a relative that passed away recently and I'm sure that will be used to purchase a new hot water heater. My wife does help me pay for things but I'm honestly the only one that works on the house since I've lived here.

Anyway, I'm just venting now.


----------



## Laser Shark (Oct 13, 2021)

Livvie said:


> It's all very unmarital of her and designed to screw you over in the event of a divorce.


I did tell her that this is how I felt. Most of the money that we saved for a down payment on the new house was actually contributed by me.


----------



## Livvie (Jan 20, 2014)

Laser Shark said:


> I did tell her that this is how I felt. Most of the money that we saved for a down payment on the new house was actually contributed by me.


Then, you have some significant issues to address.


----------



## Laser Shark (Oct 13, 2021)

Livvie said:


> You fixed things, and paid taxes and insurance on a house for 10 plus years, that your wife owns, and she is trying now to pass it off as and keep the whole value as premarital property. Property she owned and lived in for a decade as a _married woman_.
> 
> She's trying to cheat the system and laws regarding pre marital property with this post nup. Needs the post nup because without it, it is considered marital property and half yours, probably (check with an attorney!!). It was the marital residence.
> 
> ...


I had a talk with her earlier and brought up the fact that I didn't think this was completely fair. She said that I should sign the postnup and that everything should be hers. This led us into an argument and she's now mad because I told her I'm not going to fix the hot water heater that needs replaced. I told her to do it herself since I have no investment in this house. Anyway, I know I'll be the one that fixes the hot water heater.

What really frustrates me is that I did not want to spend as much as we are to purchase a new home. She wants us to spend every dime of our savings as a down payment on this home which made me nervous. She assured me that we would sell the current house and use the funds to replace our joint savings, while also being able to drop more money on our new home. All of our money is held jointly. I didn't go into this with the idea that we would purchase a new home and have her claim part of it as her own property.


----------



## *Deidre* (Feb 7, 2016)

Unless your wife is planning to divorce you, why is she concerned about this $100k and not “sharing” it with you?


----------



## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

It sounds suspiciously like divorce planning, like avoiding having things split equitably. Yikes.


----------



## Laser Shark (Oct 13, 2021)

TexasMom1216 said:


> It sounds suspiciously like divorce planning, like avoiding having things split equitably. Yikes.


I know she doesn't want to get divorced.


----------



## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

Buddy you are screwed. If your wife wants a divorce it doesn’t matter how much work you have put into the existing house, it’s hers and no judge is going to rule otherwise. 
Under no circumstances should you build this new house. In a few years you could find yourself homeless and broke.


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Get an attorney for yourself. Let the attorney read the agreement. Tell the attorney what you have told us here.

Then get the attorney to write up an agreement that protects both you and your wife. 

Let your wife know that you want to protect her separate assets, but you also want to protect yourself. It has to be a 2-way solution.


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

There is a very good chance that the money and effort you put into the house thus far entitles you so some level of equity in the home.

It looks like her parents are trying to pull a fast one on you and have your wife convinced that what they are doing is the right move.

Like I said earlier, get your own attorney. 

*"Increase in Value*​_If the value of separate property increases during the marriage, the non-owner spouse may be entitled to a portion of the increased value. This can occur when the non-owner spouse’s efforts are used to help maintain or improve the property. This can also occur if a non-owner spouse’s funds were used to pay down the mortgage or improve the property. Courts may look at whether the increase in value was due to active rather than passive appreciation. Passive appreciation occurs when the property’s increase in value has more to do with the market or the lapse in time rather than the efforts of the owner. Active appreciation involves some type of actual effort. Some states allow the non-owner to receive a portion of the passive appreciation while others split only the active appreciation. Although the non-owner spouse may be able to receive compensation for a portion of the home’s equity, he or she will usually not receive the property itself outside an agreement by the parties to do so._​​_Some common law states begin with the premise that the property subject to division should be divided equally unless there is cause for a different distribution. Therefore, the increased equity in the home may be subject to being divided in half between the parties. However, other states use a number of factors to determine how marital property should be divided. These factors may include the length of the marriage, the separate property of each party, the age and health of each party, the earning capacity of each party, the education and skills of each party, whether the parties have children and other obligations or other factors that can help inform the court of what constitutes an equitable distribution._​​_Some states also consider whether the non-owner spouse’s funds were used to refinance the house. Additionally, if the owner puts the non-owner spouse’s name on the deed, the home may then be considered marital property and subject to division. "_​_Marital Home Purchased Before Marriage: How Is It Treated? - HG.org_​


----------



## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

The way you write the sequence of events to me it just sounds like the parents are taking steps to see to it that she has some separate property preserved, and I don't really think there's anything wrong with that, but you still need to get the opinion of attorney before signing any papers.


----------



## Teacherwifemom (5 mo ago)

I will guarantee you she knew about this before you got to the lawyers office. You say she was mildly surprised? She wasn’t surprised at all, as proven by the conversation afterward (that turned into a fight) where she clearly told you she wants that 100,000 equity kept separately. Her and her parents cooked this up and she sabotaged you. That’s exactly what she did. She should have just been honest and had a conversation with you about it. I would be livid if my husband sprung something like this on me in such a way. If she’s doing this after 10 years of marriage this literally tells you that she is not confident that marriage is going to last. I have no problem with prenups and people protecting their premarital assets, but this is bizarre. Did I mention I would be livid?? I think the bigger problem here is the con. She shouldn’t be doing you dirty like this.


----------



## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

I don't understand the hysteria here. Her parents don't want money that they and your wife put up before marriage to be comingled, thus becoming half yours.

True you paid some taxes and insurance but you were also living there and I assume you weren't making mortgage payments thus allowing you to save a down payment.

So why don't you just put up an equal amount for this new house and it will belong to both of you?

I don't see the issue signing it but with the agreement thar she puts up half the down payment.


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

lifeistooshort said:


> I don't understand the hysteria here. Her parents don't want money that they and your wife put up before marriage to be comingled, thus becoming half yours.
> 
> True you paid some taxes and insurance but you were also living there and I assume you weren't making mortgage payments thus allowing you to save a down payment.
> 
> ...


Here's my take on it.

If both of them put up the same amount as down payment. She puts in $60K and so does he. Because of what he says the postnup says, she would keep her $60K investment as sole property. His $60K investment is a marital asset and if they ever split. She would get the first $60K of equity. Then they would split the remaining equity 50/50.

The postnup would need to have words added to it saying that the money he puts down on the home is 100% his sole property for them to have equal amount of equity in the home.


----------



## Laser Shark (Oct 13, 2021)

lifeistooshort said:


> I don't understand the hysteria here. Her parents don't want money that they and your wife put up before marriage to be comingled, thus becoming half yours.
> 
> True you paid some taxes and insurance but you were also living there and I assume you weren't making mortgage payments thus allowing you to save a down payment.
> 
> ...


I don't know. Its confusing to me. I've brought up that she could take the money from selling the house and put it in a personal account. It would be frustrating, but don't spend it on the new house. I would sign that it's her property from before we married. But then I'm told no. They want me to sign that $100k of any new property in the future would be hers. The down payment on this new house will be from every bit of our savings that her and I saved together. We have no other money at this time. None of this down payment money comes from her parents or the current house. Now this is frustrating to me because I didn't want to wipe out every bit of "our" savings. I didn't realize I would be having to sign something that says part of our new house is only hers.


----------



## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

Laser Shark said:


> I don't know. Its confusing to me. I've brought up that she could take the money from selling the house and put it in a personal account. It would be frustrating, but don't spend it on the new house. I would sign that it's her property from before we married. But then I'm told no. They want me to sign that $100k of any new property in the future would be hers. The down payment on this new house will be from every bit of our savings that her and I saved together. We have no other money at this time. None of this down payment money comes from her parents or the current house. Now this is frustrating to me because I didn't want to wipe out every bit of "our" savings. I didn't realize I would be having to sign something that says part of our new house is only hers.


You saved it together? I thought you said most of it was yours?


----------



## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

EleGirl said:


> Here's my take on it.
> 
> If both of them put up the same amount as down payment. She puts in $60K and so does he. Because of what he says taht the postnup says, she would keep her $60K investment as sole property. His $60K investment is a marital asset and if they ever split. She would get the first $60K of equity. Then they would split the remaining equity 50/50.
> 
> The postnup would need to have words added to it saying that the money he puts down on the home is 100% his sole property for them to have equal amount of equity in the home.


I wouldn't agree to anything that makes money he puts up her sole asset.

They'll have to crunch numbers to work that out. It shouldn't be that hard....she has a pre marital asset but this house will be half his and he should make sure that's in any legal paperwork.

But I am confused because he first said he was putting up most of the down payment but then said they'd saved together.

Numbers need to be crunched.


----------



## Laser Shark (Oct 13, 2021)

lifeistooshort said:


> You saved it together? I thought you said most of it was yours?


Yes,


lifeistooshort said:


> I wouldn't agree to anything that makes money he puts up her sole asset.
> 
> They'll have to crunch numbers to work that out. It shouldn't be that hard....she has a pre marital asset but this house will be half his and he should make sure that's in any legal paperwork.
> 
> ...


She is putting quite a bit down. We've been contributing money to the same account and consider it our money.


lifeistooshort said:


> I wouldn't agree to anything that makes money he puts up her sole asset.
> 
> They'll have to crunch numbers to work that out. It shouldn't be that hard....she has a pre marital asset but this house will be half his and he should make sure that's in any legal paperwork.
> 
> ...


I should have said more instead of most. She is still putting quite a bit down. We've been contributing money to the same account and we consider it our money no matter if someone has contributed more than the other. I don't think this has anything to do with a down payment. Her parents want her to have $100k whether she saves it or uses it on something else. I honestly just want the new house to be half mine(or both of ours). I didn't want to get into this crap where she owns more rights to the house then I do. I consider us married and equal. This new house has been in the works for a year and this was a surprise that popped up a couple weeks before we're supposed to finalize.


----------



## Laser Shark (Oct 13, 2021)

EleGirl said:


> The postnup would need to have words added to it saying that the money he puts down on the home is 100% his sole property for them to have equal amount of equity in the home.


She's not okay with it saying anything is 100% my property since this is all being done while we're married.


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Laser Shark said:


> I don't know. Its confusing to me. I've brought up that she could take the money from selling the house and put it in a personal account. It would be frustrating, but don't spend it on the new house. I would sign that it's her property from before we married. But then I'm told no. They want me to sign that $100k of any new property in the future would be hers. The down payment on this new house will be from every bit of our savings that her and I saved together. We have no other money at this time. None of this down payment money comes from her parents or the current house. Now this is frustrating to me because I didn't want to wipe out every bit of "our" savings. I didn't realize I would be having to sign something that says part of our new house is only hers.


Let's see if I get this right...

She and her parents want her to keep the money from selling the current house as her sole property.
She does not want to put the money from the current house down on the new house.

And she and her parents want you to sign something saying that on top of her keeping the equity from the current house, she gets an additional $100K as sole property from the new house?


----------



## Livvie (Jan 20, 2014)

EleGirl said:


> Let's see if I get this right...
> 
> She and her parents want her to keep the money from selling the current house as her sole property.
> She does not want to put the money from the current house down on the new house.
> ...


Even though she's NOT putting 100k from the sale of the old house (which was actually marital property) she wants him to sign something saying she owns 100k more than he does pf the new house.

That's awful.


----------



## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

Didn’t she talk him into buying the new house because she said she would use the proceeds from the current house to help pay for it?


----------



## Laser Shark (Oct 13, 2021)

No, if I do sign something like this, the money will go to the new house in the future. It better. Lol The older home isn't up for sale yet and there is no money there right now. We've been working on the house the past couple months so it can go up for sale. It's really old and it seems like every month something breaks or leaks in it. Surprise, surprise, we have to buy a new water heater this week. Lol Throughout talking to my wife today, she's not trying to screw me over. I get it, the house was gifted to her and she wants to keep most of it separate. But it's frustrating because this strays from our plan we had for most of the year. And the document says things such as any money used as a downpayment on the house is my wife's and it was gifted from her parents. We're not using a dime of her parent's money on the down payment. In fact there is no money from them. The old house hasn't even been put up for sale yet.


----------



## Laser Shark (Oct 13, 2021)

TexasMom1216 said:


> Didn’t she talk him into buying the new house because she said she would use the proceeds from the current house to help pay for it?


Yes. The proceeds go to the new house, would replace some of our savings that we are using up and also help me buy a car that I'm probably going to need in the next year or 2. We've purchased 2 newer cars for her since we've been together. We haven't purchased a car for me because i wanted to save money for the future home and Im running my car into the dirt until it no longer runs. Our 2 cars are paid off.


----------



## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

Sleepnet said:


> Yes. The proceeds go to the new house, would replace some of our savings that we are using up and also help me buy a car that I'm probably going to need in the next year or 2. We've purchased 2 newer cars for her since we've been together. We haven't purchased a car for me because i wanted to save money for the future home and Im running my car into the dirt until it no longer runs.


See that’s lousy. If she knew about this arrangement her parents were making after she got you to take that leap counting on that money, yikes, that’s a big nasty lie. Even if she didn’t, she should have told her parents no. Regardless her parents have their noses in your personal business. If you guys stay together, moving forward don’t take money from them. Money always has strings. Always.


----------



## Sfort (Sep 28, 2019)

There are so many red flags here they're blinding. Do not take legal advice from people on the Internet you don't know. If you want to know about your relationship with your wife, you're in the right place.


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Laser Shark said:


> Yes. The proceeds go to the new house, would replace some of our savings that we are using up and also help me buy a car that I'm probably going to need in the next year or 2. We've purchased 2 newer cars for her since we've been together. We haven't purchased a car for me because i wanted to save money for the future home and Im running my car into the dirt until it no longer runs. Our 2 cars are paid off.


How long did your wife live in the house before the two of you married?


----------



## jlg07 (Feb 24, 2017)

Doesn't sound right. If she wants the 100k, then she should take that from the sale of HER HOUSE, not a value in the future for your new house. HER house proceeds, since from before the marriage, COULD be just hers and not used at all for the new house, where you would both have the same equity.
Sell the old house, rent until you've (together) have built up enough savings to fund the new house. 
This whole thing about the FUTURE unnamed house and her having 100k "extra" equity seems really wonky.
I also agree -- she knew about this with her parents.


----------



## Laser Shark (Oct 13, 2021)

She's afraid that if I don't sign, her dad wont completely hand the house over to her. Which in my opinion would be pretty messed up because she did make payments to him for years. I think I remember helping her make payments for a short period of time, though that was long ago and I don't remember much. We have invested a LOT of money, time, and effort into this place without any help.

I don't want to be the reason for her not getting the house. It does frustrate me because I had the understanding that things were sorted out more than they are.

I think my first post said she had the house around 5 years before I came into the picture but I was wrong. After having a discussion earlier, i think it was around 10 years.


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Sleepnet said:


> She's afraid that if I don't sign, her dad wont completely hand the house over to her. Which in my opinion would be pretty messed up because she did make payments to him for years. I think I remember helping her make payments for a short period of time, though that was long ago and I don't remember much. We have invested a LOT of money, time, and effort into this place without any help.
> 
> I don't want to be the reason for her not getting the house. It does frustrate me because I had the understanding that things were sorted out more than they are.
> 
> I think my first post said she had the house around 5 years before I came into the picture but I was wrong. After having a discussion earlier, i think it was around 10 years.


Why the figure $100,000? Is that the current value of the house she currently owns? If the house has not sold yet, then how do they know what she will make when she sells the house?


----------



## D0nnivain (Mar 13, 2021)

From an emotional perspective, this is messed up after 10 years of marriage. A pre-nup is one thing. Before marriage you don't really know what you are getting into. Yes, she put in more cash (her parents' cash) into the house but over the 10 years you have contributed to the mortgage & upkeep. Unless she is genuinely contemplating divorce, there should be a lot more "ours" in here & a lot less "mine". 

I owned my house with a mortgage when DH & I married. Our pre-nup fixed the value of the house as of the date of our marriage & defined I would recoup the lion's share in a sale upon divorce. Over the years his salary mostly paid the mortgage while I did other things with money including bought our 2nd home, paid for vacations & nice cars. During Covid my business took some bad hits & we refinanced to pay taxes & get a better interest rate on a car DH bought that we couldn't pay cash for. So now the house is in both of our names & that is OK because our marriage is on solid footing & financially it seemed right,

After my mother died, my father was contemplating doing some Medicaid planning & transferring a lot of his assets to me in anticipation of the 5 year look back, meaning that 5 years after he did this tranfer he would be poor on paper & eligible for government assistance if he needed long term care / nursing home. Before that he would be considered private pay until his assets were exhausted. Dad needed DH to sign an ante-nup agreeing that any assets dad transferred to me would be disclaimed by DH & were not marital property because dad trusted me to give back dad's money but DH & I had only been married 3 years at the time so dad had understandable reservations about DH concerning dad's money DH had no problem with that but alas Dad died before we had to go through all that. To me that was a proper use of an ante-nup. 

This just seems like a money grab. if the in-laws want their money back that is one thing but please OP, don't sign anything without your own lawyer. Impoverishing yourself while enriching your wife so she can get this overpriced new construction does not seem like a team effort to me.


----------



## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

Laser Shark said:


> It would have been nice if her parents showed up or didn't come up with this out of the blue.
> 
> My wife acted like it was strange but wants me to sign it because she wants the money from the old house that was promised to her. After weeks of me refusing to build a new home at the price point she wanted, that was the only way she was able to talk me into it.
> 
> ...


Don't forget all the labor hours are money as well.


----------



## Laser Shark (Oct 13, 2021)

This does seem stanger the more I think about it. There is NO $100k from the old house or her parents. It doesn't exist. My wife and I are not sure where that amount came from. Based on a realtor that took a quick walk through our house, we were told we could probably get a bit more for the house. But it also makes me nervous because this house is really old. An inspector has never been in the house and who knows what could pop up. The city ups the value of our house and raises taxes quite a bit every year. But they're taxing the hell out of everyone. I truely hope even for my wife that it does sell for more.


----------



## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

Laser Shark said:


> This does seem stanger the more I think about it. There is NO $100k from the old house or her parents. It doesn't exist. My wife and I are not sure where that amount came from. Based on a realtor that took a quick walk through our house, we were told we could probably get a bit more for the house. But it also makes me nervous because this house is really old. An inspector has never been in the house and who knows what could pop up. The city ups the value of our house and raises taxes quite a bit every year. But they're taxing the hell out of everyone. I truely hope even for my wife that it does sell for more.


You're being set up most likely. 

Now, if I had a daughter and bought her a house when she got married, I'd take steps to protect her and monies in the event of D, too.

But in an open and transparent way, and with her H, if a good fellow, in the know.


----------



## TexasMom1216 (Nov 3, 2021)

I'm just riffing, but if we were to assume the wife did not know her parents were doing this, I wonder how much money the parents invested in the first house and if that's where that $100K figure comes from.


----------



## DudeInProgress (Jun 10, 2019)

lifeistooshort said:


> I don't understand the hysteria here. Her parents don't want money that they and your wife put up before marriage to be comingled, thus becoming half yours.
> 
> True you paid some taxes and insurance but you were also living there and I assume you weren't making mortgage payments thus allowing you to save a down payment.
> 
> ...


The hysteria is that his wife’s parents (and wife) ambushed him in their attorneys office, springing this document on him out of the blue and pressuring him to sign. 
A document which he has some questions and concerns about, rightfully so.
The fact that her parents want to protect their daughters premarital assets is not the issue, the sneaky and adversarial manner in which they are going about it is.


----------



## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

DudeInProgress said:


> The hysteria is that his wife’s parents (and wife) ambushed him in their attorneys office, springing this document on him out of the blue and pressuring him to sign.
> A document which he has some questions and concerns about, rightfully so.
> The fact that her parents want to protect their daughters premarital assets is not the issue, the sneaky and adversarial manner in which they are going about it is.


W and I were broke when married. Granted I was on and still on same career track, good Lord provides, so I surely am not taking all the credit for that. Her parents weren't, never have, I expect never will throw money her way. 

Made things simple though.


----------



## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

DudeInProgress said:


> The hysteria is that his wife’s parents (and wife) ambushed him in their attorneys office, springing this document on him out of the blue and pressuring him to sign.
> A document which he has some questions and concerns about, rightfully so.
> The fact that her parents want to protect their daughters premarital assets is not the issue, the sneaky and adversarial manner in which they are going about it is.


You should read my subsequent posts after he provided more informative.


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Laser Shark said:


> Both. Lol i didnt realize I was posting from both until late last night. I thought I lost my password. I later posted from a different computer in the house which the account was saved on. I'll stick to @Laser Shark.


I'll merge the two accounts.


----------



## uwe.blab (May 2, 2019)

Laser Shark said:


> Sorry about the long post. This has been a weird situation for me.
> I've been with my wife for 10 years and we live in a home that her family purchased about 15 years ago. My wife told me that her parents purchased the house (around $60k) for her and had my wife make monthly payments on it for a few years. The house was remodeled. Her parents told her she no longer had to make payments and transferred the title to her once she had paid for most of it. So I've always been told the house is hers. When we were dating, my wife asked me to move in with her. I did and have since always taken care of the house, fixed things, and helped pay for taxes and insurance. I'm in Texas and anything she owned before we married is her personal property. So she definitely owns the house.
> 
> My wife and I have been saving money since we married so that we could purchase a better home. We have no debt. We finally have enough for a decent down payment and started searching for a new place. My wife ended up wanting to build a new home which was higher than my original budget. I told her I wasn't comfortable with that at the moment since the down payment would clear out every bit of our savings. I also have a cheap 15 year old car that I'm worried won't last much longer. After arguing about that for a little while, she assured me we would sell her current home and put that into our savings. I agreed and we have been building a home that should be completed very soon.
> ...


uhhhh....do you get along with her parents very well?


----------



## Laser Shark (Oct 13, 2021)

I do but my fil is getting health issues, gets forgetful, and moody. I could go into some things on that but I generally have good interactions around them.


----------

