# Sex is the only thing left



## SteveBo (Jul 26, 2016)

Things are really bad between me and my wife and I am thinking of separation. We are arguing every time we meet but in bed we are still very active. Is this normal?


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## jld (Dec 1, 2013)

If you have good chemistry that way, it might be.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## notmyrealname4 (Apr 9, 2014)

Sex is supposed to be a glue that holds you together when the relationship is having a difficult period.

You should be working on your problems, of course. I don't think that sex alone can keep you together.

But it can assist you to work through the other things.

Sometimes sex can act like the spare tire you put on your car after a flat.

You don't drive around from then on with the spare tire, like everything is okay.

You drive to a tire dealer and get the real problem fixed.

But the spare tire enabled you to make it through until you got the new tire.

Dumb analogy I guess, best I could think of


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

Sex is to marriage like mayonnaise is to a sandwich. You keep making your sandwich with good mayo, but spoiled deli meat. 

You and your wife need to learn to communicate honestly, deeply, and openly. You need to learn to hear each other without defenses, without rationalizing, without excuse making.

Sex has kept my marriage connected enough to keep trying.


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## KillerClown (Jul 20, 2016)

So relationship gets better in bed or are you having angry sex?


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## SteveBo (Jul 26, 2016)

KillerClown said:


> So relationship gets better in bed or are you having angry sex?


We get better the day we have sex. We are still angry but we start teasing each other and things get better. The day after we are fighting again.


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## Lostinthought61 (Nov 5, 2013)

what are the fights about?


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## SteveBo (Jul 26, 2016)

Xenote said:


> what are the fights about?


It is about her lies.

I explained better in my first topic. She lies compulsively and she lives in a world of her own. She has a business and I don't know nothing about her income and expenses. When I ask her about it she tell me things and amounts that I know they are not real, but I can't prove it. She lies the same on other things too, like where she have been and about some conversations she would have with family members or friends. I started counseling and went to a lawyer but despite all this I can still have good sex with her. At least once a week. I don't know if it is normal or not but I am getting confused.


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

SteveBo said:


> Things are really bad between me and my wife and I am thinking of separation. We are arguing every time we meet but in bed we are still very active. Is this normal?


And this is bad why?

Stop arguing and life will be great. 

Many of us have the opposite.


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

How do you file your taxes? Married, file separately?


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

Marriage needs trust as well as sex. Without trust and love, you are just fckbuddies. Thats fine if that is what you want, but you need to protect yourself financially.


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## SteveBo (Jul 26, 2016)

blueinbr said:


> How do you file your taxes? Married, file separately?


Separately


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## plomito (Apr 7, 2015)

I guess... Protect yourself financially and any corner because you might be looking at the beginning of the end

Sent from my SM-N920T using Tapatalk


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## notmyrealname4 (Apr 9, 2014)

SteveBo said:


> It is about her lies.
> 
> I explained better in my first topic. She lies compulsively and she lives in a world of her own. She has a business and I don't know nothing about her income and expenses. When I ask her about it she tell me things and amounts that I know they are not real, but I can't prove it. She lies the same on other things too, like where she have been and about some conversations she would have with family members or friends. I started counseling and went to a lawyer but despite all this I can still have good sex with her. At least once a week. I don't know if it is normal or not* but I am getting confused.*



That's what good sex is supposed to do: blind you to the other person's faults. 

And you'll lose the ability to see things clearly and logically, and want to stay with the person who makes you feel so great.

I'm sorry OP, you have some real serious issues going on. And I'm glad your sex life is good.

But sex was never intended to help you see your partner's faults, lol. It's supposed to make those faults seem invisible; at least for the first couple of years of a relationship.


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## KillerClown (Jul 20, 2016)

SteveBo said:


> It is about her lies.
> 
> I explained better in my first topic. She lies compulsively and she lives in a world of her own. She has a business and I don't know nothing about her income and expenses. When I ask her about it she tell me things and amounts that I know they are not real, but I can't prove it. She lies the same on other things too, like where she have been and about some conversations she would have with family members or friends. I started counseling and went to a lawyer but despite all this I can still have good sex with her. At least once a week. I don't know if it is normal or not but I am getting confused.


Is she hiding income from you or is she hiding the fact that the business is going down?


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## KillerClown (Jul 20, 2016)

OK, now I remember you. You got bigger fish to fry than what's happening in the bed. 

I wondered why you were still in this marriage but now I see the sex must be that good.


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## LucasJackson (May 26, 2016)

SteveBo said:


> Things are really bad between me and my wife and I am thinking of separation. We are arguing every time we meet but in bed we are still very active. Is this normal?


Sure it's normal. You guys are compartmentalizing. Your physical attraction and relationship is separate from your emotional relationship. You're cheating on each other with each other.


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## SteveBo (Jul 26, 2016)

KillerClown said:


> SteveBo said:
> 
> 
> > It is about her lies.
> ...


She hides income and expenses. Even if it is not business related she want me to know nothing about her finances.


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## Herschel (Mar 27, 2016)

Yeah, get divorced. If your spouse doesn't WANT to share finances with you, why the hell are you trying to build a future with her? Stop arguing and trying to figure this out. She is lying and hiding and sucks you back in with sex. You can't be this blind. You are posting on a message board asking about it.


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## tropicalbeachiwish (Jun 1, 2016)

Just have so much sex that there's no time for fighting! 😉

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## EunuchMonk (Jan 3, 2016)

Sounds like you're going in circles, OP. Maybe some prayer will do the trick.


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## Begin again (Jul 4, 2016)

Ah, it so hard for men to see this. Isn't sex the decider? If sex, erotica, boning is good, can't all else be forgiven? 

Uh, no. Get real. Bring it all to the table... Great sex cannot make a marriage.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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