# selfish men....



## nicole8125 (Nov 17, 2011)

what makes men selfish and self centered? and where they think it is there way or no way? is it posible 2 get them 2 c things from another persons point of view? b understanding, and how do u get those type of men 2 listen and stop thinking u r "playing games" when u r the 1 being faithful etc...?
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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

We men are individuals...

Need more information on your particular situation and what's happening with your husband/bf


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## nice777guy (Nov 23, 2009)

nicole8125 said:


> what makes men selfish and self centered? and where they think it is there way or no way? is it posible 2 get them 2 c things from another persons point of view? b understanding, and how do u get those type of men 2 listen and stop thinking u r "playing games" when u r the 1 being faithful etc...?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Using real words might be a good start...

And not all men are like that. There are just as many women playing those same games.


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## CallaLily (Jan 13, 2011)

nicole8125 said:


> what makes men selfish and self centered? and where they think it is there way or no way? is it posible 2 get them 2 c things from another persons point of view? b understanding, and how do u get those type of men 2 listen and stop thinking u r "playing games" when u r the 1 being faithful etc...?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Most people who are self centered probably grew up that way. They probably have entitlement issues. Either everything was given to them/went their way, OR nothing did so they feel the deserve for it to. 

Unless they can see how they are bing towards another and are truly sorry for their actions, chances are they may stay that way, especially if they are getting something from whatever they are doing.


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## nicole8125 (Nov 17, 2011)

everything is always my fault and i will not leve. yes it is my fault because i make threats and dont follow through i let him treat me any way he wanted too only cuz i love him. for the record we r not married and with things going the way they r, we will never b! i m tired of it! he is the only 1 ive been with this whole year i cant c myself with anyone else, but i want him to treat me with respect and idk how 2 do that. he never shows me affection, selfish n all areas including sex. i m starting 2 have resentment towards him and i dont want that @ all i feel he has it n him 2 b that man but isnt making any step twords it because i am weak i wont stand up to him i am not afraid of being. alone, but i am afraid if i let go completely he wont come back. now i am the one always trying 2 get affection and he wont do it. i tried to tell him how i feel and what i need. he just says stop crying about everything. i m not happy at all i no i could b if he would show me that he loved me instead of just saying it. he always aasks me if im talking 2 other men and i am not. its like he doesnt believe me though.
sorry 4 the long post! please help, what should i do 4 him 2 start showing me he cares and how can i get him 2 open up??
sorry once agan 4 the long post!!
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## CallaLily (Jan 13, 2011)

There is nothing positive or uplifting form this relationship. Its best to cut your ties. A lot of how he treats you is because you have allowed it. You say he treats you the way he has because you love him. Love is not letting others treat you poorly. Until you have some self respect, you can't expect him or anyone else to show you any.

You say you're not happy but could be if he would show you some respect. I think you're not happy with yourself regardless of what he could show you. You are in the wrong relationship. Fix yourself and your self esteem before getting into another relationship.


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## nicole8125 (Nov 17, 2011)

i said he treats me the way he does because ive allowed it, i havent set some boundaries.
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## nice777guy (Nov 23, 2009)

nicole8125 said:


> i said he treats me the way he does because ive allowed it, i havent set some boundaries.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Well - you can try to set some boundaries.

Or - honestly - you can just move on and start over with the next person in your life.

As said above, I'm not hearing anything real positive about this on your end.

A lot of us feel "trapped" in bad situtations due to marriage, or children. I would honestly say you should just move on before things become even more complicated - and focus on boundaries in your next relationship.


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## SockPuppet (May 16, 2011)

nicole8125 said:


> i said he treats me the way he does because ive allowed it, i havent set some boundaries.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


If you have allowed it, and your aware. Awesome first step, really. Your going to get farther in your next relationship if your willing to admit your mistakes in the present one.

Now, you cannot do anything, ANYTHING to get him to change. He has to be willing to change. Considering how you have dealt with him in the past, Id say he wont change for you.

Move on.


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## nicole8125 (Nov 17, 2011)

i guess he really thinks i wont leave him but news flash! he has lost me!!!! an i no he thinks i am not serious cuz before they were just threats, but i am so DONE!!!!
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## nicole8125 (Nov 17, 2011)

i need 2 b strong that means on my end cuz i no he isnt going 2 text me or call me i highly doubt he will, and if he does i will not answer and will not text back unless i c a 180 and i mean a full one @ that not some half assed job. if he isnt willing 2 show me than i am gone 4 good, no looking back, no more i love yous, absolutely nothing!! i cant and wont put up with it anymore!!
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## CalifGuy (Nov 2, 2011)

nicole8125 said:


> what makes men selfish and self centered? and where they think it is there way or no way? is it posible 2 get them 2 c things from another persons point of view? b understanding, and how do u get those type of men 2 listen and stop thinking u r "playing games" when u r the 1 being faithful etc...?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


A very healthy dose of sex (i.e., DAILY) usually makes me the kindest, most considerate and loving hubby out there. :smthumbup:


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## nicole8125 (Nov 17, 2011)

what is so hard to understand? i am writing this on my cell phone because i dont have internet on my computer. so someone let me no what exactly it is that is hard to understand??
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## CallaLily (Jan 13, 2011)

I didn't have trouble reading it. I got what you were trying to say. 

Anyway, I think you need to spend some time working on yourself and your self esteem. Once you do, you will no longer allow anyone to continue to treat you like this.


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## nicole8125 (Nov 17, 2011)

how much straight to the point can i get? it is straight forward!
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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Then start respecting urself FFS! Yeah yeah u luv him, but do u love urself enough 2 make sure he has da best possible package that a woman herself can be? Neways u did good to leave him.

His choice to either make it up 2 u or u can just move on


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## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

As I wrote in another post, selfish men are often so because at some primitive level many women find it sexually attractive.


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## nicole8125 (Nov 17, 2011)

it is such. a turn off to me!!! he is so so insensative 2 my wants and needs i m fed up 2 my max!!
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## Jamison (Feb 10, 2011)

nicole8125 said:


> it is such. a turn off to me!!! he is so so insensative 2 my wants and needs i m fed up 2 my max!!
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


So have you dumped him yet? If not, the sooner the better, You need to take care of you.


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## nicole8125 (Nov 17, 2011)

doing good havent called or texted havent talked 2 him i have been focusing on college.
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