# Husband left me and my 4 children



## Just-Jennfer

Hi everyone

I just wanted say hi and maybe connect with others going through similar situations?

Mental illness and domestic abuse, mainly phsycological, and threats passive amd not so passive

Pretty sick stuff

Its the reason we are divorcing and the fact that he left us.

Been together 17 years and im feeling the loss so deeply and the sadness is overwhelming some days.
Kids are feeling it too but getting better

Other days are okay but most if the time im so sad and lonely

Lost my mum and my marriage one after the other and the grief is so overwhelming

Its neen going on for months
When does it end?


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## Talker67

i have some dealings with relatives who have gone crazy. it is a real almost insurmountable problem.

the crazy person needs to be evaluated.
then they need drugs prescribed.
then after some period of time, they need the prescription strengths or type of drugs modified to work better, or have fewer side effects.
and finally they need to continue to take those drugs, likely for the rest of their lives.

if you can not get the crazy person to do all of that....four steps, religiously...they are not going to get better. 
and believe me, due to side effects, they really REALLY do not want to take the drugs.

i feel sorry for your situation, but as far as i can tell, the above course of action is the ONLY one that actually works.


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## Just-Jennfer

Its a heartbreaking situation. He was sectioned 2 times diagnosed delusional psycotic disorder and given anti psycotics released and left to rot his illness stops him believing he actually is ill and he believes all his delusions, for instance he is God then the devil ect..
And was still released and left in a hotel to rot and doesnt take his meds 

Its hard to process the end of something in these complex circumstances 😔

My heart is heavy but yes divorce was the only option and picking up the pieces with the children


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## Talker67

Just-Jennfer said:


> Its a heartbreaking situation. He was sectioned 2 times diagnosed delusional psycotic disorder and given anti psycotics released and left to rot *his illness stops him believing he actually is ill *and he believes all his delusions, for instance he is God then the devil ect..
> And was still released and left in a hotel to rot and doesnt take his meds
> 
> Its hard to process the end of something in these complex circumstances 😔
> 
> My heart is heavy but yes divorce was the only option and picking up the pieces with the children


yep, same deal here. My nephew thinks he is a genious game designer who has discovered the "seccrets to the universe and time". He keeps saying he will defect to china or russia and give them the secrets to control time.

in otherwords bat **** crazy.

if he is diagnosed psychotic, and is not taking his meds, that is it. there is not other choice. you need to divorce him. and get a restraining order to keep him away. and probably a gun and some training in case he DOES break in and try to do you harm.

it is tough, but the path for you is very clear. just move on, and protect you and your kids


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## Just-Jennfer

Talker67 said:


> yep, same deal here. My nephew thinks he is a genious game designer who has discovered the "seccrets to the universe and time". He keeps saying he will defect to china or russia and give them the secrets to control time.
> 
> in otherwords bat **** crazy.
> 
> if he is diagnosed psychotic, and is not taking his meds, that is it. there is not other choice. you need to divorce him. and get a restraining order to keep him away. and probably a gun and some training in case he DOES break in and try to do you harm.
> 
> it is tough, but the path for you is very clear. just move on, and protect you and your kids


Yes thats all i can do at this point 

Like your nephew my husband belives he is the savoir of the world and this oandemix os all his fault 
That the vaccine is mark of the beast with lucerphereese patented at 666 or something 
Crazy right 

And he is also the king of england and he unlcomed a dead man switch and unlocked all the blackmail material that the CCP china use to control all the politions worldwide oh amd that the law isnt lawful and all hospitals are death camps its just goes on and on


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## Just-Jennfer

Its the lonliness that gets me and doing it all alone 

I have my faith and that keeps me but human fellowship and friendship is needed 
Suffering anxiety and depression.
Good and bad days i pray that its all over soon and i can feel like me again


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## EleGirl

I'm sorry you are going through this.

The most important thing you can do right now is to take very good care of yourself. Your children need for you to do this. And you need for you to do this.

Do you have a job, or are you at stay-at-home mom?

What are you doing for yourself?

Do you have help from anyone with your children? I assume that your husband does not have them with him at any time.


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## Just-Jennfer

EleGirl said:


> I'm sorry you are going through this.
> 
> The most important thing you can do right now is to take very good care of yourself. Your children need for you to do this. And you need for you to do this.
> 
> Do you have a job, or are you at stay-at-home mom?
> 
> What are you doing for yourself?
> 
> Do you have help from anyone with your children? I assume that your husband does not have them with him at any time.


I dont allow hik near the children. They miss him terribly all they knownis dad isnt well and in hopsital. ( evan though he is now out )

Im a stay at home mum 2 of my children have addional needs autism and adhd sensory processing dosorder amoungst other ailments and ilnesses so my hands are super full 

I dont have anyone to help my eldest is ahving a baby due april she is still living at home 

We go to church so i am trying ti get more involved with them volunteering saturdays so thats something.

No one for the chidren olthough my eldest helps out. So greatful for her help.

Im currently trying to pass my car driving test so i can drive as i have ti take a lot of taxi here there and everywhere 

My husband was the driver so i never meeded to drive 

Now i do and hope that i can pass that in the midst of all this 

Im just super lonley i ecan signed up to a penpal site


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## Talker67

Just-Jennfer said:


> Yes thats all i can do at this point
> 
> Like your nephew my husband belives he is the savoir of the world and this oandemix os all his fault
> That the vaccine is mark of the beast with lucerphereese patented at 666 or something
> Crazy right
> 
> And he is also the king of england and he unlcomed a dead man switch and unlocked all the blackmail material that the CCP china use to control all the politions worldwide oh amd that the law isnt lawful and all hospitals are death camps its just goes on and on


yep, if you were not personally involved, all these rantings and built up alternate universe stuff would be interesting to disect.
but you, being a rational being, keep trying to logically reason with the crazy person...and you might as well be talking to a brick wall.

I lucked out, in one case, i just am out $5,000 i paid to a lawyer to get the kid off of some felony charges related to him being crazy and acting that way. With the other nephew, i just had to put in a couple day's time moving his soon-to-be ex-wive's stuff out of their appartment, for her health and safety reasons.


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## Talker67

Just-Jennfer said:


> Im just super lonley i ecan signed up to a penpal site


of course you are. that is a huge amount of stuff on your shoulders.


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## Anastasia6

Please know that some of the disorder show genetic tendencies so as your children enter 17 years and up please watch them for the signs. Getting help early can make a difference.


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## Just-Jennfer

Anastasia6 said:


> Please know that some of the disorder show genetic tendencies so as your children enter 17 years and up please watch them for the signs. Getting help early can make a difference.


Unfortunatly the saddest part is all his problems mental health problmes are a result from the trauma he went through as a child 

But is good to know that it may not be and to watch out for these signs 
Thank you 
I pray that they do not get this type of illness


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## Just-Jennfer

Talker67 said:


> of course you are. that is a huge amount of stuff on your shoulders.


Hard stuff 

How did you deal with all that and not get super impacted?
or how did you evan deal.with that all ? 
Im sorry to hear about your struggles life is so challanging sometimes


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## Talker67

Just-Jennfer said:


> Hard stuff
> 
> How did you deal with all that and not get super impacted?
> or how did you evan deal.with that all ?
> Im sorry to hear about your struggles life is so challanging sometimes


my wife kind of freaked out. especially when we started getting death threats from one of the nephews after helping him out.
One thing that did help is he is physically far away, like would have to drive 2 days to get here...so there is that buffer. also, he is more likely to go back to his home state if he really did become violent (also far away) and would strike there first, to settle some local scores.

How did we deal? we got a ring alarm doorbell so we could see who was at the door without opening it, alerted the local police of the happenings, and i moved a pistol with a few high capacity magazines down to a new gun safe i put in a first floor room for easy access. Other than that, we are just crossing our fingers that he does not show up on our doorstep.

We have found that the FBI/Secret Service are relatively uninterested in such maters unless 1) the threats are on a sitting senator/congressman/judge/president, or 2) there is a clear arrestable violent offense that he has done. If it is just threats....i guess they get them all day long to investigate....maybe they open a file and put the crazy guy's name into their system....if that

IF the crazy nephew was also living in our state, the police then would recommend we get a restraining order to keep him away.


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## Just-Jennfer

Talker67 said:


> my wife kind of freaked out. especially when we started getting death threats from one of the nephews after helping him out.
> One thing that did help is he is physically far away, like would have to drive 2 days to get here...so there is that buffer. also, he is more likely to go back to his home state if he really did become violent (also far away) and would strike there first, to settle some local scores.
> 
> How did we deal? we got a ring alarm doorbell so we could see who was at the door without opening it, alerted the local police of the happenings, and i moved a pistol with a few high capacity magazines down to a new gun safe i put in a first floor room for easy access. Other than that, we are just crossing our fingers that he does not show up on our doorstep.
> 
> We have found that the FBI/Secret Service are relatively uninterested in such maters unless 1) the threats are on a sitting senator/congressman/judge/president, or 2) there is a clear arrestable violent offense that he has done. If it is just threats....i guess they get them all day long to investigate....maybe they open a file and put the crazy guy's name into their system....if that
> 
> IF the crazy nephew was also living in our state, the police then would recommend we get a restraining order to keep him away.


I see 

I am waiting for a bell with a camera to be fitted so i can see who is there also
And the police have a urgent response marker on my home for a quik repsonse 

we are not permitted to have guns in this country so i have to rely on the police


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## Talker67

Just-Jennfer said:


> I see
> 
> I am waiting for a bell with a camera to be fitted so i can see who is there also
> And the police have a urgent response marker on my home for a quik repsonse
> 
> we are not permitted to have guns in this country so i have to rely on the police


ah, that is the downfall of countries that take away your right to defend yourself and your kids.

at the least i would get a baseball bat and keep it by the door.
do they allow "pepper spray" there? How about an electronic stun device like a Taser?

How about buying a guard dog, and learning how to use it?

Literally this guy could show up and do some crazy ****, and the police will be there 20 minutes later to clean up!


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## Diana7

Just-Jennfer said:


> Its the lonliness that gets me and doing it all alone
> 
> I have my faith and that keeps me but human fellowship and friendship is needed
> Suffering anxiety and depression.
> Good and bad days i pray that its all over soon and i can feel like me again


Do you have friends and support from others in your faith?


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## Diana7

Talker67 said:


> ah, that is the downfall of countries that take away your right to defend yourself and your kids.
> 
> at the least i would get a baseball bat and keep it by the door.
> do they allow "pepper spray" there? How about an electronic stun device like a Taser?
> 
> How about buying a guard dog, and learning how to use it?
> 
> Literally this guy could show up and do some crazy ****, and the police will be there 20 minutes later to clean up!


Its not a downfall to not have guns. It saves thousands of lives a year. 
Tasers are also illegal here thank goodness. They can be really dangerous in the wrong untrained hands.
On an urgent call the police would be here very fast.


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## Just-Jennfer

Diana7 said:


> Do you have friends and support from others in your faith?


Yes one who knows all i thank the lord for her.


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