# Serious problem please help



## badgerskunk (Oct 13, 2009)

MY wife explodes in anger at times, usually every few months, this time it was bad, keep in mind this is seemingly completely out of the blue, she makes crazy irrational statements she seems to be losing her mind, it is usually glossed over after and things are like it never happened I want this pattern to stop, I am a very good man, I work hard and devote my life to my family.

HER NAME says:
you are ridiculous. ignoring your wife is always the solution to a heated conversation
HER NAME says:
enjoy work. go eat some sick ****ing lunch with your bud jake maxwell
HER NAME says:
and ****ing pretend like you aren't a part of this family which you are already so ****ing good at
MY NAME says:
I will talk to you when you can talk to me respectfully, you cannot speak to me this way anymore than I can you
HER NAME says:
go and fill your brain with all that FRIEND has to off and make sure you send out a ****load of pictures to your friends at work and then when you come home ignore your family and act annoyed by your step kids so that as they grow older they will have more than just the reasons their biological dad gave them to despise you
MY NAME says:
You anger is your responsibility, and being frustrated does nothing to justify it, the situation is completely irrelevant, it is not ok to talk to me this way
HER NAME says:
i don't give a ****. you're emotionally distant anyways so perhaps you will hardly notice
MY NAME says:
you are in the wrong here, and its not a gray area
MY NAME says:
there are other peoples feelings other than your own you have to consider, you arent the only one who feels wronged at times, your just the only one in this family who chooses to handle it this way
HER NAME says:
i'm the only one is this family who handles anything
HER NAME says:
so that makes sense
HER NAME says:
why don't you pack your **** and move back into the latest "pad" so you can continue wasting your energy and life
HER NAME says:
and not mine
HER NAME says:
and not my kids
HER NAME says:
you can be single and ****ing retarded like all your pathetic friends 
HER NAME says:
i don't want to be with you anymore
HER NAME says:
i do not want to be married to you
HER NAME says:
i do not want to be your wife
HER NAME says:
i do not want to be your slave
HER NAME says:
to be indebted to you
MY NAME says:
I will talk to when you have calmed down
MY NAME says:
I will do you a favor right now and end this before you destroy everything beautiful in your life
HER NAME says:
my ass. i don't want you to come home today
HER NAME says:
i will lock the doors
HER NAME says:
i don't want to be with you anymore
HER NAMEsaid (11:19 AM):
the only beautiful thing in my life is my children and i have to share them with a monster. i hate you. i hate you i hate you i hate you. i want you to disappear and i never ever want to see you again.
[email protected] said (11:21 AM):
save this. save it so you can read it and be angry at me. i will do the same. i was stupid to marry the first person i dated after getting a divorce from one monster.
HER NAME said (11:22 AM):
i never wanted to get married again anyways and the only reason i did it was for you. idiot girl
always repeating the same ****ing pathetic mistakes. trying to please all these ****ing pervert men who just **** you and dump on you. i ****ing hate you.
My Name says:
I will be home at 6:40 or earlier to watch the kids while you are at class
HER NAME says:
there is nothing to stop me from acting this way, unfortunately
it is not a class. it is a work meeting
i am not trying to play a victim
i am obviously the one doing the damage and i am fully aware of that
i prefer it to be that way
and you are never bullied into submission. you get all high and mighty intellectually demeaning towards me
you are not the victim either, although i know you actually enjoy thinking you are
if you don't want to be with me there is nothing keeping you here
Josh says:
HER NAMEie, I am not repeating this pattern, you have allowed your anger to take over and have said hurtful things and it was wrong, if you want to pity yourself or remain angry or doomsday rather than take responsbility for your actions that is fine, but I wont pretend its ok
HER NAME says:
and i might be better off without you
Josh says:
I am not feeding this fire, I have told you how I feel about this
HER NAME says:
then drop it already and quit the better than thou sermons
i don't need you to watch the kids. i'm not going to the meeting
so i don't expect to see you after work
keep your pathetic sentimental bull**** to yourself untill you can realize you're not perfect either
i ****ing hate you
i ****ing hate you i hate you i hate you
i ****ing hate you
i ****ing told you i needed you today
but i am no ****ing camping trip or hunting trip
so i can take a ****ing backseat
i ****ing hate you
My Name says:
No HER NAMEie, I told you this morning I have used too much leave and explained that I could not take off work that way especially so close to needing a good reference from SUPERVISOR
HER NAME says:
**** you
My Name says:
either way, it does not justify the way you treat me
HER NAME says:
**** you and plan your next ****ing trip
with someone other than your family
so you won't be able to be there for them when they need you
i ****ing hate you
i give you way too much credit
don't ****ing talk to me anymore
you want it over? then ****ing shut up and leave me the **** alone
My Name says:
When you behave this way, it is abusive, and you have your reasons just like every abuser has their reasons, but they are just reasons, not excuses, and you are accountable for your actions and I wont allow you to degrade me
HER NAME says:
you're right. i am an abuser
i am so evil
poor little pitiful My Name
then leave
leave now 
My Name says:
I can not talk to you now because I have a customer, but I suggest you calm down and try to think about what it is your doing and why and the consequences of your actions on more than just yourself
HER NAME says:
no
i don't give a **** about you 
just myself and my kids and the rest of you ****ing disgusting people can all burn in hell
enjoy your customer
save their lives
so you can pat yourself on the back
and feel ever more righteous
don't ****ing talk to me anymore
HER NAME says:
get a backbone and leave me. i will not stop. i don't want to stop. it feels good to hurt other people. it makes me feel good. i ****ing hate humanity and i ****ing hate life. if you weren't such a prideful arrogant jerk you'd ****ing admit defeat and put an end to this ****ing miserable relationship. i would never walk away because i actually kinda enjoy the chaos. i like the power i have
to ****ing destroy things
it feels good and i fully intend to destroy this if i haven't already. so get a ****ing backbone or quit preaching to me


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## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

well im not proud of it, but a lot of what your wife says sounds like what i used to say to my H. i used to call him every low thing i could think of. 

i dont think i realized the damage i was doing until i made him cry. he was so stoic most of the time that i didnt think i was making a dent. but after i saw how much i was hurting him, i started to realize what a horrible person i was becoming. it still took some time for me to curb my anger, but i dont have outbursts like that anymore. 

and he's changed a lot too. if he had of stayed the person he was, i dont know if i would have mellowed out. maybe. but more then likely either he would have left or i would have.


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## logansmommy812 (Nov 4, 2009)

It sounds like she doesn't feel like you devote enough time with her and your family. I don't know if that's true that's just what it looks like. I can understand if you want a break and go out with friends or whatever you like to do but try to devote some extra time with the family and some alone time with the wife. Or offer to keep the kids while she goes out. Sit down and try to talk with her more and ask how her day has been or something. Like i said before..i don't know if that's the problem but that's what i got from reading it. I hope ya'll can work things out.


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## kruz77 (Nov 6, 2009)

its a frustration, maybe depression. she is not happy with her or her life. i feel this way and i say sometimes mean stuff to my husband, i dont mean them but its seems like only this way i get his attantion, in a way. we having big problems and we HAVE to go to a Marriage Counseling.


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