# Husband is on Sugardaddy. Is this cheating?



## NatashaAngel (Jul 29, 2013)

I found emails on husband's account to and from women that apparently he has advertised for on SugarDaddy website. Some emails state that he wants to meet for no strings attached sex. Even asks how much for fun behind closed doors. He has even set place. But I'm not sure if he has actually gone thru with any of these meetings. 
Is just the fact that he's texting and emailing advertising to be a sugar daddy, is this cheating?
Would really like some advise.


----------



## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

Whether there's something on his stringer or not, his line is in the water, so he's fishing. He's doing his part, the rest is up to the fish. I suppose if you really wanted to see how serious he was, you could create a fake account, respond to his posts, arrange a meet, and see if he shows.


----------



## NatashaAngel (Jul 29, 2013)

Yes, I've thought of that. I just don't understand how someone who says has no energy and doesn't feel like having sex with his wife who is willing, how he has energy to go looking else where for it.


----------



## mablenc (Feb 26, 2013)

Well he's not there for car advise,  sadly something is wrong.


----------



## Sbrown (Jul 29, 2012)

Start an account of your own and send him a message. Set a time and place to meet for no strings sex and see if he shows.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## RoninJedi (Jun 22, 2013)

If he hasn't cheated already, he's looking, and apparently has no qualms about paying for it.....gross.....

Confront him with this pronto.


----------



## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Paying for it? That alone is cheating. Money that should be for the family/home is going to this mess? Oye.

Yes, it's cheating. Mentally at least. And don't buy the whole, "I was curious about it" mess. LMAO! That's the dumbest lie ever.


----------



## Fleur de Cactus (Apr 6, 2013)

He is cheating and wants to cheat. He may be old or LD sex but he wants young girls for excitement and is ready to pay for it! Sorry but it is happening.


----------



## Chelle D (Nov 30, 2011)

Natasha...... These are actually emails FROM him, to the website? or is it things in his spam emails?

If they are actually emails from your husband, then yes, in my mind, that is cheating. Even if he never went thru with any meetings. Even if he is just "playing" it for a fantasy & never really means to act on it. It is still giving him an option to find sexual pleasure from another woman. If he's not physically cheating, His mind already has.


----------



## Natalie789 (Aug 24, 2013)

Even talking to these women is cheating in my book. This is not ok. Of course you want to know if he's gone through with anything, but the fact that it's even gone this far is trouble.

I'm so sorry for what you're going through. Hopefully you guys can work it out.


----------



## kezins (Aug 25, 2013)

He's somewhere in the process of cheating. If he'll pay for sex, I'd definitely never sleep with him again and get tested for all the diseases ASAP.


----------



## SaltInWound (Jan 2, 2013)

NatashaAngel said:


> Some emails state that he wants to meet for no strings attached sex. Even asks how much for fun behind closed doors.


Sounds like prostitution to me.


----------



## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

Whenever I hear the term " sugardaddy" I get pictures of really old men with tons of money an dressed in multi coloured or polka dot 70's style suits, and a bevy of 20 something yr old bikini clad "gold diggers" all over him.

Never occurred to me that he could be someone's husband...:scratchhead:


----------



## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

My estranged husband was on "Sugardaddy.com", so I have experience with this problem. You've probably got far more problems than cheating. You better guard your bank accounts and credit cards!

The women, for the most part, on that site only want a wealthy man who can take care of them. Unfortunately, they have no scruples. You really should read the profiles--it made me sick. They basically want a man to write them out a check every month and provide them a place to live. My estranged husband was providing a place for one of his Sugar Babies" to live and writing her out a check for $3K a month. That didn't include all the trips, clothes, and dining out.

Yeah, it's an environment where sex is compensated. And there are "strings attached".


----------



## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

827Aug said:


> My estranged husband was on "Sugardaddy.com", so I have experience with this problem.
> 
> *You've probably got far more problems than cheating. You better guard your bank accounts and credit cards!*


:iagree: .

Even if I was single , and I wanted to get in on some action why would I sign up on a site called " sugardaddy?"
Reminds me of the saying;

*" A fool and his money are soon parted.."*


If I was in the OP's situation, I wouldn't even bother to try
" catching him " to prove anything.
I would probably get a friend or family member to help me , sign up under an alias, clean out his bank account , out him ,then file for divorce and still claim half of everything.


----------



## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

Caribbean Man said:


> :iagree: .
> 
> Even if I was single , and I wanted to get in on some action why would I sign up on a site called " sugardaddy?"
> Reminds me of the saying;
> ...



Yeah, I know. That's what I should have done. As it is, these high maintenance witches got all of our money. Sugar Daddy no more. The OP is dealing with a horse of a different color.


----------



## OhGeesh (Jan 5, 2010)

If you want a way to really bust him PM I know all about this lifestyle and it's not nearly as cut and dry is you think. Every major college in the US has coeds signed up for these sites......like I said if you want ways to catch him discreetly PM me and best of luck! 

The most popular site out there watch this video. 

ABC Nightline Coverage of SeekingArrangement.com - YouTube


----------



## Kurosity (Dec 22, 2011)

I would say that you need to forward emails to your self, all of them, print them out and put away for safe keeping.

Instead of running around trying to bust him by creating a trap. Just confront him about it.

It could be likely that he does not have energy or desire to have sex with you because he is living a double life right now and what is attracting his energy away from his marriage/wife is his pursuing of these other females/ NSA sex.

In my opinion you should confront him rather then go all stealth and end up stalking him and trying to bust him....he has already been caught at it and yes it is cheating if he is seeking other females for sex he is not free to date or look for another women so it is an "unfaithful" action he is taking.


----------



## ReformedHubby (Jan 9, 2013)

These sites are definitely bad news. To me its all about intent. It doesn't really matter if he's followed through with it or not. With that said I'm sorry to admit that I know several young ladies in entry level positions at my company that literally brag about the guys they take advantage of on that website. To them its supplemental income. They even have boyfriends that help them spend the money.

Most of these guys are paying them money and buying them gifts for the "chance" to sleep with them. It never actually happens. Also, from what I gather a lot of them aren't sugar daddies in the traditional sense. In other words they aren't really rich. So there are quite a few cases where they are probably going into debt to buy gifts. Sad all around. I'm afraid if you dig deeper you really won't like what you find. But you definitely need to know the truth.


----------



## ladybird (Jun 16, 2010)

Since he is looking for no strings attached sex, you have to assume that he has already had sex with someone. It shouldn't even matter if he has or not, the point is that he is already looking for it. 

I would create a fake profile on there of someone who he may be interested in and send him a message, see if he replies and wants to meet up, if you don't want to have a friend do it for you.


----------



## kezins (Aug 25, 2013)

ladybird said:


> Since he is looking for no strings attached sex, you have to assume that he has already had sex with someone. It shouldn't even matter if he has or not, the point is that he is already looking for it.
> 
> I would create a fake profile on there of someone who he may be interested in and send him a message, see if he replies and wants to meet up, if you don't want to have a friend do it for you.


Good idea. It's easy enough to snag fake pics for a profile online. Then screen capture everything and print copies.


----------



## NatashaAngel (Jul 29, 2013)

Thank you all for your responses, unfortunately you all agree with it being cheating, which I felt too. I have printed out all emails he sent from his email address. Felt sick from some of them. 
And trying hard to act like things are ok, not wanting to tip him off that I know yet. But it's not an easy thing to do, and not sure how long I will last. But have to get some things lined up first, like my name on our house. I know dumb that I'm not on it. But he was newly divorced and feeling insecure and said we would and could change it later. Attorney was to handle in 2011, but looked it up and still in his name only. Not sure if it will matter during divorce settlement, but figured can't hurt. 
And I feel divorce is only recourse. Not first time suspected of cheating. Just first time wasn't as graphic and wasn't willing to be without what I had worked so hard to achieve. But can't live with him doing it again and so crudely. No respect for me. Don't understand how he can tell me to my face that he loves me and that he's happy with us and wouldn't know what to do without me.
Also just a side note, but I work for his family company too. So not only is my marriage screwed up, but I have to figure out job and home too. Sucks.
Sorry babbling ...


----------



## Hortensia (Feb 1, 2013)

Wanna know how far he'd go? Set up a fake account, put the face of a gorgeous young girl, or if you are in a good shape, place some headless sexy pictures of yourself. I doubt he would recognize you, he most likely barely pays attention to you right now. Then get it started.
You'll witness an Ea beginning, going full force to a PA. He'd send the other you money, talk to her with "sweetie", "love", etc, and ask for getting together. You will have all the proof you need to confront him, and if the case, use this in court. Your choice to divorce is the right one. Good luck.


----------



## jen53 (Apr 26, 2013)

trouble is when confronted with emails the usually response is it was curiousity, my husband said emailing was just titilatin - we discussed how it would break my heart if he went to escorts etc - did it stop him? nope, he just got more cunning - I would actually set up an account t I did, and see if you can arrange a meet - then when you confront him or meet him he can't pull the I was only looking, no intention, nothing in it routine - I actually believed my husband for a long time, tolerated him online - never imagined a quiet inexperienced man like him would have the gall to arrange, and go through with meets - but he did


----------



## OhGeesh (Jan 5, 2010)

If you are certain divorce is the only way then by all means go for it!! If you think even by the slightest chance that he will be able to talk his way out of it...........then maybe setting up a fake account is best just to prove he would actually do it.

I work with guys and I can't tell you how many times people have said "Come look at this page!" and it's a backpage.com posting. A lot of guys really do just join for the rush, but never have the funds, fortitude, or time to actually do anything.

Good luck!!


----------

