# How to prevent getting my wife pregnant?



## DEVIL_MAY5 (Aug 1, 2012)

*Hello everyone, I'm going to get married soon, me and my girlfriend didn't have sex yet, we agreed to to do it after getting married, I'm 22 btw, anyway, what are the methods besides condoms to prevent her from getting pregnant? some people said 3 days before her period or some stuff like that, and honestly I didn't get it.
so please since you people are married so you know better
I'll appreciate any help.
Thanks*


----------



## TheCrunch (Sep 3, 2012)

This should help

Pros & Cons of Contraception


----------



## geek down (May 10, 2012)

Get a vasectomy...


----------



## JCD (Sep 2, 2012)

Separate bedrooms 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## strugglinghusband (Nov 9, 2011)

geek down said:


> Get a vasectomy...


Yep if never ever plan on kids, its the way to go, slight pain for a few days..no big deal.


----------



## I'mInLoveWithMyHubby (Nov 7, 2011)

Condoms worked great for us.

I don't like the birth control methods for women. They have extra hormones in them and other ingredients I would not want to put into my body that may cause cancer later in life.

We used condoms for the last 9 years before my husband got the big V. They worked well for us.


----------



## JCD (Sep 2, 2012)

Vasectomies are permanent. They don't want to have a family NOW
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## DEVIL_MAY5 (Aug 1, 2012)

strugglinghusband said:


> Yep if never ever plan on kids, its the way to go, slight pain for a few days..no big deal.


I'm only 22... I'm planning on kids but now right now


----------



## DEVIL_MAY5 (Aug 1, 2012)

And please someone tell me , what are these " Safe days " ?


----------



## farside (Oct 27, 2012)

Its more complicated than there simply being a safe day. 

If you are against artificial contraception (i.e. religious reasons) the method typically taught is called "natural family planning". See the below link. Classes are offered in it and I am told it' s complicated enough that the classes help and are often offer by the Catholic Church for free. 

Although Catholic, I have never used it.

Natural Family Planning -- FamilyDoctor.org


----------



## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

Tell her to keep track of her temperatures every morning, before she gets out of bed. That is basal body temperature. She needs to do it every morning so she knows when she is likely to ovulate. Get a basal body thermometer. She will have to chart her temperatures everyday so she will know the pattern, and if/when she ovulates. Honestly, even this is only a guide. There really is no "safe" time in the cycle. One woman I know got pregnant right after her period ended. Weird, I know. But it happens. If she doesn't want to use pills or shots or IUDs, then plan to use condoms. Nothing is foolproof, though. Keep that in mind.


----------



## strugglinghusband (Nov 9, 2011)

Maricha75 said:


> Tell her to keep track of her temperatures every morning, before she gets out of bed. That is basal body temperature. She needs to do it every morning so she knows when she is likely to ovulate. Get a basal body thermometer. She will have to chart her temperatures everyday so she will know the pattern, and if/when she ovulates. Honestly, even this is only a guide. There really is no "safe" time in the cycle. One woman I know got pregnant right after her period ended. Weird, I know. But it happens. If she doesn't want to use pills or shots or IUDs, then plan to use condoms. Nothing is foolproof, though. Keep that in mind.


:iagree:
If you think you may want kids then forget the vasectomy.
Birth control for her, condom for you and the above, at the same time.
all three may keep it from happening, but like maricha said, Nothing is fool proof....well except, abstinence.


----------



## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

Just send her to her GYN to get some birth control pills.


----------



## DEVIL_MAY5 (Aug 1, 2012)

Will do, Thank you very much


----------



## geek down (May 10, 2012)

DEVIL_MAY5 said:


> I'm only 22... I'm planning on kids but now right now


Freeze some sperm and then get a Vasectomy then..This way you control your own DNA...and there will be NO surprises!


----------



## missymrs80 (Aug 5, 2012)

geek down said:


> Freeze some sperm and then get a Vasectomy then..This way you control your own DNA...and there will be NO surprises!


Yes, this is by far the most cost effective method.....not.


----------



## wiigirl (Jun 14, 2012)

arbitrator said:


> Just send her to her GYN to get some birth control pills.


This....simple








_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Open up now let it all go (Sep 20, 2012)

What's wrong with condoms?


----------



## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Open up now let it all go said:


> What's wrong with condoms?


They fail once in a while.


----------



## JCD (Sep 2, 2012)

geek down said:


> Freeze some sperm and then get a Vasectomy then..This way you control your own DNA...and there will be NO surprises!


I hope that is a joke.


----------



## TCSRedhead (Oct 17, 2012)

The pill takes 30 days to become effective and MUST be taken at the same time every day. 

There's also an IUD which is hormone free that you can use and is effective immediately.

Condoms, sponges, barriers which can interrupt the whole mood but are still effective.


----------



## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

Best way is IUD or the pill, or if you want to do it without devices go the NFP + pullout method (just know that there is always a chance for a surprise) FTR ther is also a conversation on a "accident vs abortion" thread.


----------



## Open up now let it all go (Sep 20, 2012)

EleGirl said:


> They fail once in a while.


But thats a really low chance of failure right? We've been using them for 4 years now withou any problem. Does the problem lie with condom rupture or is the permeability of the polymer just not zero?

On topic I think the best.contraception is birth control as we stopped having sex while she used that :/
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## east2west (Oct 19, 2012)

Birth control has all kinds of health risks including low sex drive later on.

Condoms break.

So, I say just get good at pulling out in time.

Been doing it for eight years and no accidents yet.


----------



## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

There's a term for men who use the rythem method.....dad. 

Now me personally I hate condoms. I didn't get married so that I can cum in a bag for ten years. So no, not for me. Maybe that's why I have 3 kids.


----------



## Terry_CO (Oct 23, 2012)

JCD said:


> Vasectomies are permanent. They don't want to have a family NOW
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Not always, AFAIK. There's a way to get two little valves installed. Like the water cutoff under the sink. Turn them off now and back on later when kids are wanted 

Some are even remote controlled  Turn down the TV volume, and turn up your fertility. All without leaving the comfort of your recliner. Sort of a "nut remote" :rofl: :
The vasectomy you can switch on and off at the push of a button | Mail Online


----------



## I'mInLoveWithMyHubby (Nov 7, 2011)

Open up now let it all go said:


> But thats a really low chance of failure right? We've been using them for 4 years now withou any problem. Does the problem lie with condom rupture or is the permeability of the polymer just not zero?
> 
> On topic I think the best.contraception is birth control as we stopped having sex while she used that :/
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


We used them a total of 10-11 years without fail. We finally decided for hubby to have the V done just in case one did break. I can't have any accidents.


----------



## ladybird (Jun 16, 2010)

DEVIL_MAY5 said:


> *Hello everyone, I'm going to get married soon, me and my girlfriend didn't have sex yet, we agreed to to do it after getting married, I'm 22 btw, anyway, what are the methods besides condoms to prevent her from getting pregnant? some people said 3 days before her period or some stuff like that, and honestly I didn't get it.
> so please since you people are married so you know better
> I'll appreciate any help.
> Thanks*


 Well there is 

the pull out method (this is not 100%)
birth control
Dont have sex
if she knows her cycle, no sex 4-5 days before ovulation (but she would really have to know her body, for this to work)

That is about all i can think about other then condoms


----------



## PeaceTrain (Jun 25, 2011)

I dont mean to derail this thread, but does any of you know whether birth control pill covers the 7 days period time or not when no pills are taken. What i mean is if a women is on birth control pill, can she get pregnant during her period when she is not taking birth control if she had unprotected sex? There is 21 pills a month right?


----------



## DEVIL_MAY5 (Aug 1, 2012)

Thanks again for responding everyone, some of you asked me what's wrong with condoms, well I don't think that a latex bag could feel good comparing to skin to skin action, plus I can call myself an active person, I mean come on if I'm going to have sex 3 times a day that would cost me a fortune!!!
and about pulling out in time, I read 5 months ago an article about while having sex, few drops of semen could just go without noticing while having sex which leads to pregnancy, so taking chances in not acceptable really


----------



## DEVIL_MAY5 (Aug 1, 2012)

geek down said:


> Freeze some sperm and then get a Vasectomy then..This way you control your own DNA...and there will be NO surprises!


ummmm, and if I wanted to have kids like after 10 years? Even if it's frozen, I guess it will expire...


----------



## CantePe (Oct 5, 2011)

Nuvaring or depo shot..


----------



## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

Been married 17 years using the rhythmic method and it has never failed.
If you spouse's monthly cycle runs on time every month,and she has a 28 day cycle, then let her mark her days on a calender.
14 days from the beginning of her last period is the ovulation period.

Usually day 13 - 15 are highly unsafe or very fertile days.

A day has 24 hours and sperm can live for days swimming about in a woman's womb, count 2 days before ovulation and 2 days after. Those 5 days are the " unsafe days " in her monthly cycle.
Usually when couples are trying to get pregnant, they have sex multiple times during those five days.
So when you are having sex within those 5 days, use condoms. 
Outside of those 5 days, you are safe.

But she must first keep an accurate calender.
If you have sex within those 5 days without protection, them there's always the " morning after " pill.
But that pill sometimes disturbs her monthly cycle.


----------



## Charmed37 (Aug 13, 2012)

IMPLANON - Birth control that goes under the skin of your arm.

Implanon-IMPLANON is a hormone-releasing birth control implant for use by women to prevent pregnancy
for up to 3 years. The implant is a flexible plastic rod about the size of a matchstick that contains
a progestin hormone called etonogestrel. Your healthcare provider will insert the implant just
under the skin of the inner side of your upper arm. You can use a single IMPLANON implant for
up to 3 years. 

But as with other methods, there can be side effects. Read on all forms of birth control so you and your soon to be wife can decide together what works best for you both.


----------



## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

Caribbean Man said:


> Usually when couples are trying to get pregnant, they have sex multiple times during those five days.


In the case of my ex and I, when we decided to have a baby it only took one time, I knew exactly when my son was conceived. The one and only time we ever had sex without a condom during the fertile days.

Looking back, that memory almost feels like the very start of the end of the marriage somehow - that sparkle seemed to disappear forever from my W's eye that split moment in time, everything from that moment on seems to be pure resentment and I can't tell if it all comes from me, or her or from both. Anyways, it seems like a very calculated event and whatever passion there may have been at the time seems like it just got erased from history. For me it was kinda like a transcendant moment, one of complete certainty and I just knew my life was going to change forever (and it did).

I'm not saying this is how it will be for OP though, just relaying my emotions from the time - I mean that is come crazy, heavy stuff I just wrote there, lol. So if OP doesn't want to knock her up, or have a moment in life like I just described, follow CM's advice - no sex without a barrier between says 11-17 (I tended to be extra careful) after the beginning of her period. Of course those days of ovulation are also when women are most horny, so definitely have the condoms on hand.


----------



## tjohnson (Mar 10, 2010)

WorkingOnMe said:


> There's a term for men who use the rythem method.....dad.
> 
> Now me personally I hate condoms. I didn't get married so that I can cum in a bag for ten years. So no, not for me. Maybe that's why I have 3 kids.


OMG working, i almost spit my beer when i read this. so true. I have 3 kids (love them all) on the rythem method. Funny

I don't like condoms as they decrease sensitivity. In a perfect world get your wife to climax quickly then let her finish you orally. This has its problems with me as my wife will (in the heat of the moment grab my butt forcing me to come in her...9 mos later baby number 3 LOL..

I totally disagree with the vascectomy route. No doctor would recommend that unless they wanted the cash (i am in medicine-don't laugh) the pill is the most safe but, I have not found one that doesn't have adverse effects on wifey's libido.


----------



## jacksparow1964 (Sep 28, 2012)

we tried this for years and worked just fine , not risking your health nor hers.... just you need to shoot outside !!!! this is how it worked for mankind ever since


----------



## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

Lon said:


> *In the case of my ex and I, when we decided to have a baby it only took one time, I knew exactly when my son was conceived. The one and only time we ever had sex without a condom during the fertile days.*
> /QUOTE]
> 
> Lon,
> ...


----------



## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

yeah CM, I felt like I was off topic a little... but... "sniper" very accurate metaphor. My timing was good, but it wasn't luck it was just knowledge. I don't know if it needs a new thread because I doubt it is like this for very many others at all, but I've always wondered to myself, if I'd have not been successful that one time and instead had "spread a pattern" if my recollections of trying for a child would be fonder, not feeling the weight of that one moment, and feeling like it was chance, because being calculating about it just seems so clinical. Or maybe it's because I felt I understood my W's cycle better than she did.


----------



## kag123 (Feb 6, 2012)

Please have her see a GYN prior to your wedding day. At her age, regardless of whether she is a virgin, she should be getting regular check ups anyway. If she has never been to one, now is the time. There are soooo many BC methods out there, most with 99% or more protection against pregnancy. No one should take this kind of advice from a forum of strangers - just my opinion. There is too much misinformation out there and it's too easy to get overwhelmed. It would be a good idea to go with her to the doc appt if she is ok with that. The doctor will explain all of the different BC options and how they are used. Be aware that all carry some side effects. When dealing with hormonal BC, it can take years of trial and error to find the one that works with her body the best. This is for you guys to decide together, with her doctor.

Just my opinions.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Casual Observer (Sep 13, 2012)

EleGirl said:


> They fail once in a while.


The only time I ever had a condom fail was using one of the "natural lamb" variety. Kind of freaked us out but thankfully not at a critical time in her cycle. Yes, the "natural" variety felt nice, but truthfully, the Durex Extra Sensitive is pretty darned good (presently using them when we want "less messy" sex at night, obviously, since we're in our mid-50s, a failure wouldn't be an issue anyway).

Condom failures are likely overblown (interesting choice of words?). If you really don't want kids, and experience a condom failure, there's always the morning-after pill alternative, but I doubt it will come up.

The other issue about family planning is that there's something to be said for a certain randomness in the kid timing department. It's easy to say you don't want to have kids until you take care of this, that, and some other thing, but that list will continue to be added to... there will always be something. Plus, if you are successful at putting it off (as we were), then the actual process of creating the new family member can be very stressful when it doesn't happen as quickly as you'd like.

The nice thing about condoms, as opposed to most other forms of birth control, is that if they fail, you likely know it. Thus it becomes easily combinable with an emergency contraceptive for darned near foolproof contraception, something not so easily done for other methods. The only thing I notice that might contradict this slightly is the extent to which the ejaculate works its way back up the inside of the condom with continued activity after orgasm... never noticed that before. This even after leaving some room at the end. Something to keep an eye on.

But ultimately, 100% foolproof contraception might not be the best thing anyway, _if_ you plan on having kids sometime and aren't in an end-of-the-world situation if it were to happen sooner than later.

(Personal record- Two great kids, both planned, both took longer to "create" than we would have liked, which created a bit of stress in what should be a fun process. Zero failures as indicated by unplanned kids. High sample rate.)


----------



## Rags (Aug 2, 2010)

For us, pill, which she started before the wedding (so as to be ready in time) which she stayed on until we wanted to have children. (About 3 months, as it turned out - but we didn't know that in advance!)

After that, we experimented with diaphram, which we didn't like (I could feel it) and the pill some more - but we found that being on the pill actually affected her libido somewhat.

Following having our last child, we had an IUD fitted, and it's been fine for the past 9 years. Due for replacement soon, as they have a 10 year lifespan.

Discuss it with your fiance and a professional - in advance. Many options out there, with varying levels of reliability, intrusion and side effects.


----------

