# 36 years of marraige flushed!



## brighterlight (Aug 13, 2009)

Unbelievable. 6 years of dating, almost 31 years of marraige, 3 wondeful grown up and married children. And she wants a divorce. No going back, we dropped it on the kids last weekend. She is spritually and emotionally empty (she says) and she wants to know do what's best for her. She was not happy for many years in the marriage according to her about my weight and my "pessimism". My weight is not super obese. Yes, I am 45 pounds over weight. She has asked me on several occasions to lose the weight, she has asked me go to counseling for behavior modification on my "negative views" and I have done that; for her; the kids say I so have my moments but under a lot of stress, they disagree on her characterization of me. I have already lost about 12 lbs in the last 3 weeks but it is too late for her. The kids do not agree with her assesment of me and they are furious and in a lot of pain, especially my youngest son who is engaged and will be married in November, he is hurt the most. I am still willing to take her back after all of that, I still love her. I tried to explain to her the putting conditions on a spouse is not a positive thing. I have lived under her conditions for many years and never lived up to her expectations. She feels that she gave up a lot to stay in the relationship since she had to conform to my home body lifestyle. NOT TRUE. I love the outdoors, I love being with a small group of friends, the quiet in the mornings, etc. She is a socialite type. Lot's of getting together with large groups of people; I thought it was chaos on may of those occasions. I have been there for her every step of the way, in 2004 she had a nasty knee injury that disable her for a very long time; several months, it changed her running around lifestyle. Last year she diagnosed with cancer and I grieved with her; it took 7 months of hundreds of test and over 50 doctor visits for the final diagnosis and we brought God into out lives more than ever before. It was a long grueling suffering year but I love her unconditionally. I want her to be happy, that's all, whether she is with me or not. I am so heart broken, I feel sick. I am sorry to vent her but it's the only place to vent. I could say more but I am spent. The kids say she has lost all emotion and sense of reality. I say she is just so unhappy that she needed a change. I need to find some peace.


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