# Porn addiction



## xbatmanrocks (8 mo ago)

I found out in February my husband has a porn addiction. He was stealing money from me, even buying content from his ex gf. He had a kik where he was talking to another girl from his past no clue what was said because all messages were deleted. We've been married 8 years.

He is actively trying and doing well with not watching porn. I installed a spy app on his phone to see. My problem is now he is on reddit looking at naked girls, lying to me about everything like small stupid things. He just lies so much it's insane idk where to go from here.


----------



## BigDaddyNY (May 19, 2021)

xbatmanrocks said:


> I found out in February my husband has a porn addiction. He was stealing money from me, even buying content from his ex gf. He had a kik where he was talking to another girl from his past no clue what was said because all messages were deleted. We've been married 8 years.
> 
> He is actively trying and doing well with not watching porn. I installed a spy app on his phone to see. My problem is now he is on reddit looking at naked girls, lying to me about everything like small stupid things. He just lies so much it's insane idk where to go from here.


Sounds like he could use some counseling. He's got more than just a porn issue going on from the sound of it.


----------



## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

xbatmanrocks said:


> I found out in February my husband has a porn addiction. He was stealing money from me, even buying content from his ex gf. He had a kik where he was talking to another girl from his past no clue what was said because all messages were deleted. We've been married 8 years.
> 
> He is actively trying and doing well with not watching porn. I installed a spy app on his phone to see. My problem is now he is on reddit looking at naked girls, lying to me about everything like small stupid things. He just lies so much it's insane idk where to go from here.


It's all a problem, but the lying is certainly the biggest problem at the bottom of everything else and is not likely to change if that's the way he's learned to operate.


----------



## xbatmanrocks (8 mo ago)

DownByTheRiver said:


> It's all a problem, but the lying is certainly the biggest problem at the bottom of everything else and is not likely to change if that's the way he's learned to operate.


And it's dumb stuff like today I asked if he told his mom happy mother's day he said yes than texts her 5 minutes later to wish her a happy mother's day. I'm like why not just say omg I forgot thanks for reminding me. Or he will lie about something someone texted him again always dumb stuff. But the porn and talking to girls was going on for years before I found out at least 2 years that I can confirm off and on


----------



## *Deidre* (Feb 7, 2016)

The problem besides the lying and addiction, is he seems to see you as someone willing to “save” him over and over, so he doesn’t have to deal with his behaviors. Jumping from porn to Reddit but essentially doing the same thing, isn’t “trying.”

If he has an addictive personality, he will just keep jumping to the next destructive thing so counseling may be his best option. But he has to want to change, not only for you but for himself.

What do you want the future to look like? Would you remain in the marriage if he continues lying?


----------



## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

xbatmanrocks said:


> And it's dumb stuff like today I asked if he told his mom happy mother's day he said yes than texts her 5 minutes later to wish her a happy mother's day. I'm like why not just say omg I forgot thanks for reminding me. Or he will lie about something someone texted him again always dumb stuff. But the porn and talking to girls was going on for years before I found out at least 2 years that I can confirm off and on


So he is a chronic liar and sounds very childish. He probably doesn't even know what it is to tell the truth on any consistent basis. I don't know how you can deal with someone like that and plan on doing that into the future.


----------



## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

Why are you still with him?


----------



## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

xbatmanrocks said:


> I found out in February my husband has a porn addiction. He was stealing money from me, even buying content from his ex gf. He had a kik where he was talking to another girl from his past no clue what was said because all messages were deleted. We've been married 8 years.
> 
> He is actively trying and doing well with not watching porn. I installed a spy app on his phone to see. My problem is now he is on reddit looking at naked girls, lying to me about everything like small stupid things. He just lies so much it's insane idk where to go from here.


Doesn't sound like he is doing well. 

Life is WAY TOO SHORT.


----------



## xbatmanrocks (8 mo ago)

Openminded said:


> Why are you still with him?


Idk I have borderline personality disorder and a strong fear of abandonment. I've been with his since I was 19 we have 2 kids and thinking about separating makes me panic I'm so scared to be alone I've been seeking counseling myself


----------



## She'sStillGotIt (Jul 30, 2016)

Porn isn't your problem.

Being married to a pig who's looking to get himself some action on the side is your problem.


----------



## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

xbatmanrocks said:


> Idk I have borderline personality disorder and a strong fear of abandonment. I've been with his since I was 19 we have 2 kids and thinking about separating makes me panic I'm so scared to be alone I've been seeking counseling myself


Do you have family and friends who can help?


----------



## hofaqotu (7 mo ago)

How did it end up?


----------



## kimduhan (Feb 19, 2019)

its really was a big problem for me in past


----------



## BecauseSheWeeps (9 mo ago)

BigDaddyNY said:


> Sounds like he could use some counseling. He's got more than just a porn issue going on from the sound of it.


More people really need to be like you. Instead of jumping to -divorce him- you suggest that he gets help.


----------

