# found Vibrator in husband car



## knitting (Aug 19, 2014)

I don't know what to think. My husband had to go out of town and he would always ask if i wanted to come with him, but this time he didn't and I could understand why he didn't ask. but i just thought maybe he didn't want me to go.
So anyways he came back the next day and he was telling me all about repair on a trailer, so we went to bed woke up the next day and I had asked him for his keys (my truck has no a/c) he asked me where are you going and i told him to the post office, he told me that he needed to get some tools before i left. )well he didn't know that i had already found his vibrator) when he went out to his truck i could see that he was trying to find it. but i said nothing and i don't know what to do or say to him.
Can someone help me i really don't know whats going on with my husband other then he has to get off in his truck. i am mad because i don't know what to think


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## aug (Aug 21, 2011)

What type of vibrator? Was it clean?


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## Personal (Jan 16, 2014)

I guess it can be one of a few things, if it's brand new unused and in a box it might be a surprise gift for you. If it's used, I suppose he could be using it on himself, or someone else or a friend of his used it on someone else in his truck and he knew about it?


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## murphy5 (May 1, 2014)

If I were going to shack up with some truckstop floozy, I would not plan ahead and buy a vibrator for her! 

I would assume he just has an anal fetish and uses it for masturbation purposes when he is alone sleeping in the cab.


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

Time for a honest disscussion.

hows your sex life?

or start snooping for evidence of an affiar


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## bubba29 (Feb 29, 2012)

OK, you obviously know more about him and your relationship together but we don't. Answer some questions:

1) Was the vibe packaged?
2) Can you describe the vibe in detail?
3) Do you two have sex toys at home?
4) When he travels, does he stay in hotels?
5) How long was he gone?
6) When he asks you to come with him, do you always go?
7) Does he spend a lot of time on the internet and/or his phone?
8) How open are you two about your sexuality? Is it something you talk openly about with each other?


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## bubba29 (Feb 29, 2012)

Lila said:


> LOL Murphy5. You have a way with words.:rofl:
> 
> OP, if the vibrator was not brand new (sealed package), then here's some advice that will tell you if it was for his personal use or for someone else.
> 
> Bring it out the next time you and he are feeling frisky. Tell him you found it in the car, he should have told you his desire for anal play, and proceed to use it on him. If he freaks out and calls you crazy, you will know that the vibrator was meant for someone else. Step #2 will be to figure out if it was another man or woman. Just saying...


we don't even know what the "vibrator" looked like. in the technical sense, most vibrators are made for clitoral stimulation and don't work well for anal stimulation. i am a man who loves anal stimulation and i know this all too well. i am very open about this with my wife but it grosses her out. he could be hiding this kink from her but we cannot assume this based on what we know now.


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## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good afternoon knitting
The most likely is that he used it for masturbation and was mortified that you found out. Could have either used it on his penis (yes, that works for men) or anally. Men use sex toys a lot more than is generally admitted. I think it is a lot less socially acceptable for men than for women.

Its of course possible it was used with another woman, but that seems a lot less likely - if it were hers she would have taken it with her. 


When you are in bed, let him know you found it and see if he would like you to use it on him in some fashion. (if that is OK with you).


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## Hicks (Jan 14, 2011)

Give it a sniff, this may give you some clues as to what it was used for.


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## IcePrincess28 (Aug 4, 2014)

There are some men out there who'd rather admit to a lie, than admit they got a vibrator for their personal anal pleasure- (if applicable)- due to their misinformation that people might automatically ask the next question- "do you like men"-


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## murphy5 (May 1, 2014)

Hicks said:


> Give it a sniff, this may give you some clues as to what it was used for.


ewwww!

A vibrator, like a bullet type one, can indeed be used to stimulate oneself during masturbation. Guys sometimes hold them under the penis head (hint hint for wives!)

If it is a penis shaped vibrator (i.e. a D***o), then the downside is that he was probably watching gay porn while he masturbated, so I would have "the WTF discussion" with him and look for clues in his response.


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## DoF (Mar 27, 2014)

1. How is your sex life?

2. Time for serious discussion with him. Whatever you do, DO NOT ASSUME. Let him tell you what it's about and gauge his answer/honesty.


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## Big Mama (Mar 24, 2014)

Guys can use any anal toy a female can. Do they do make toys for anal play that guys can use why sure they do. 

I agree if it belonged to another woman then she definitely would have taken it with her. That is to important to leave behind. 

Maybe it was a gift for you and he was curious about how it looked and worked and decided to examine it even if it was not for him and how he examined it may have had nothing to do with using it on him self. They are kinda difficult to get back in the box I must admit. 

How often does he go away, and how long does he stay for usually. 

Sometimes guys do need a little help to reach "O". That doesn't mean he was watching gay pron or any porn. He may have just had a toy for his own personal use, like one reader suggested "the bullet under the head" is a common use for such things. 

Maybe it was even an embarrassing gift a co worker gave him as a joke. Guys do such weird things sometimes in the name of humor. Maybe he wanted to see what your response was to him showing it to you. Not that you would want to use an opened gag gift, but it might spark enough interest to have you think about going out and buying one for your own fun. 

I like to think positive and not jump to all the worst case senerio options. Until I have hard proof I like to keep an open mind. 

I hope you find the answer you are looking for with out hurting your spouse. I hope it was a thoughtful gift for you, weather you accept or not.


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## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good evening murphy5
I have to disagree. Enjoying anal stimulation and being aroused by men are completely different things. In fact people making that sort of assumption are why men would tend to hide this sort of activity. 

There are lots of ways straight men might use vibrators of various types for masturbation. Look at a sex toy shop under "toys for men". Also if this was something new for him, he may not have picked an optimal toy for what he was thinking of doing.






murphy5 said:


> (snip)
> 
> If it is a penis shaped vibrator (i.e. a D***o), then the downside is that he was probably watching gay porn while he masturbated, so I would have "the WTF discussion" with him and look for clues in his response.


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

richardsharpe said:


> Good evening murphy5
> I have to disagree. Enjoying anal stimulation and being aroused by men are completely different things. In fact people making that sort of assumption are why men would tend to hide this sort of activity.
> 
> There are lots of ways straight men might use vibrators of various types for masturbation. Look at a sex toy shop under "toys for men". Also if this was something new for him, he may not have picked an optimal toy for what he was thinking of doing.


Wellll... Murphy specifically said a penis shaped device. Speaking as a straight guy who has one or two "toys for men" in the toybox, the likelihood of a straight man going into a sex toy shop and buying a penis shaped one to try out is pretty slim. The ones for men are most often alien penis shaped, at best. With bulges and bends that aren't natural. The penis shaped ones for dudes are usually called "Black Bart" and have a sissy boy in assless chaps (redundant, I know...) bent over on the box...

Just saying... Being anally stimulated doesn't mean you're gay. Being anally stimulated by a penis... That moves you a few notches to the gay side of the spectrum. 

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## larky (Nov 27, 2009)

I would just rub some clear jalipino pepper sauce on it and let it dry. The next time he comes walking in like a bowlegged cowboy, you know he used it


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## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good evening PBear
that is not necessarily true..... also, some sex stores have a limited variety. 

There are straight men who are into women using strapons. Whether or not that is gay depends on your definition. For me, for it to be gay, another man needs to be involved somewhere






PBear said:


> Wellll... snip
> . Speaking as a straight guy who has one or two "toys for men" in the toybox, the likelihood of a straight man going into a sex toy shop and buying a penis shaped one to try out is pretty slim.


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## Big Mama (Mar 24, 2014)

larky said:


> I would just rub some clear jalipino pepper sauce on it and let it dry. The next time he comes walking in like a bowlegged cowboy, you know he used it


True, that is the best way to find out. Or his lady friend likely will have issues, assuming there is a lady friend. Jalapeno sause is bound to not be pleasant for either person involved. 

As a side note, when this thread shows up in my inbox, it says "Viberator found in Husband - " Yikes. It doesn't have room to say in husbands truck. A word to the wise for anyone wh may be getting ideas, please remember that the anal cavity is a nn ending one. So don't put things there that can become lost. You really don't want to have to go the ER for retrieval.


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## knitting (Aug 19, 2014)

Well let me first say that the Vibrator was ours. that's why i cant understand why he would take it with him. I also know that my husband is not cheating on me. the other thing is that i was looking on his cell phone and notice he download a picture of a man giving a BJ to a Tranny. and my Husband usually don't travel this was a one time thing. and then to also find the picture Now What Am I To Think!!!


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## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good evening knitting
Oh, that makes sense and is OK. (really )
He's kinky, has an anal / submissive fantasy. Tranny porn is something that plays with gender lines - and is a relatively common kink among otherwise straight men. 

You could get a strapon and dominate him and he'd probably love it. (ask first, but that is the way I would bet)





knitting said:


> Well let me first say that the Vibrator was ours. that's why i cant understand why he would take it with him. I also know that my husband is not cheating on me. the other thing is that i was looking on his cell phone and notice he download a picture of a man giving a BJ to a Tranny. and my Husband usually don't travel this was a one time thing. and then to also find the picture Now What Am I To Think!!!


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## clipclop2 (Aug 16, 2013)

I think you need to do more investigation before you confront him. But right now I'd be pretty afraid. it doesn't mean that he's crossed the line but it is a little surprising. check your cell phone records. 

so his business trip was just an overnight? Does he always go to the same area? Stay at the same hotel? 

since he knows that you have the vibrator or most likely have it he's been concocting stories in his head if you can front him. So it's really important that you gather more information before you do it. 

and if he is scared it may take some time for him to relax again. 

it could be on the low and that he just likes anal stimulation but it could be a lot more. I think the thing that kills me is that I'd be afraid to have sex with him without protection in this limbo.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

knitting said:


> Well let me first say that the Vibrator was ours. that's why i cant understand why he would take it with him. I also know that my husband is not cheating on me.


How do you know that he's not cheating on you?




knitting said:


> the other thing is that i was looking on his cell phone and notice he download a picture of a man giving a BJ to a Tranny. and my Husband usually don't travel this was a one time thing. and then to also find the picture Now What Am I To Think!!!


Me? I'd think that he met someone to have sex with.. maybe a tranny. It might not have even been a business trip.

There have been other women here who posted similar situations.


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## DoF (Mar 27, 2014)

knitting said:


> Well let me first say that the Vibrator was ours. that's why i cant understand why he would take it with him. I also know that my husband is not cheating on me. the other thing is that i was looking on his cell phone and notice he download a picture of a man giving a BJ to a Tranny. and my Husband usually don't travel this was a one time thing. and then to also find the picture Now What Am I To Think!!!


Well, one can say it's your failure to not have your husband's anus figured out by now!!! 

Sit down with him and tell him what you found and have a adult conversation about it. Remember, it is embarrassing to him so it's important that you set the stage/environment in which he will open up (smile, touch him, be nice etc etc).

Good luck


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## bubba29 (Feb 29, 2012)

knitting said:


> Well let me first say that the Vibrator was ours. that's why i cant understand why he would take it with him. I also know that my husband is not cheating on me. the other thing is that i was looking on his cell phone and notice he download a picture of a man giving a BJ to a Tranny. and my Husband usually don't travel this was a one time thing. and then to also find the picture Now What Am I To Think!!!



how is your sex together? does it bother you that your husband likes anal stimulation? do you fantasize about things you would never act on sexually?


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## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good afternoon all
keep in mind that for many people fantasy and reality are very different. They may fantasize about, and read stories or watch porn about things they would never do in real life. 

I think its really unlikely he brought the vibrator to use with another person. Wouldn't they bring their own if that is what they like? Wouldn't he expect the owner of the vibrator to notice it was missing when they when to use it because he wasn't around? Why not just buy another - was it some sort of high $$$ ultra fancy one?


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## Coldie (Jan 2, 2014)

Tranny porn and a vibrator in his vehicle?

Sounds like he has a fetish. IMO, anyone that does something "secret' is cheating. So, confront him and find out what is going on. If you are open minded, let him know you'd like to help him with his fetish. If you are not, don't judge him. That's why he is keeping it a secret. He is embarrassed.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

knitting said:


> I also know that my husband is not cheating on me


Yeah all cheated on partners say that.

Truth is there's no way for you to know he's not cheating unless you're with him 24/7.

Up until now you didn't know he took the vibrator and you didn't know he jacks off to tranny porn.

There's probably a whole lot more you don't know about your husband.


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## clipclop2 (Aug 16, 2013)

You didn't know he had taken the vibrator and you can say with certainty he isn't cheating? There is obviously much you don't know about this man.

Where was the vibe in the car? How did you find it? You asked him for his keys after you had already been in the car. Do you snoop often? It's that why you think you know he isn't cheating?

What's the real story here?


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## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good evening
I suggest only confronting him if you can accept that he has a fetish. Fetishes aren't that unusual, but if you can't accept one that seems strange to you, then it may be better not to ask. 





Coldie said:


> Tranny porn and a vibrator in his vehicle?
> 
> Sounds like he has a fetish. IMO, anyone that does something "secret' is cheating. So, confront him and find out what is going on. If you are open minded, let him know you'd like to help him with his fetish. If you are not, don't judge him. That's why he is keeping it a secret. He is embarrassed.


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## BeachGuy (Jul 6, 2011)

First this...



> My husband had to go out of town and he would always ask if i wanted to come with him,


Then this...



> and my Husband usually don't travel this was a one time thing


:scratchhead::scratchhead::scratchhead:


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## clipclop2 (Aug 16, 2013)

I agree. There is something going on with this story. If the OP isn't making this up and is having difficulty getting her brain to accept what her eyes see it is one thing. But there is definitely more here.


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## murphy5 (May 1, 2014)

richardsharpe said:


> You could get a strapon and dominate him and he'd probably love it. (ask first, but that is the way I would bet)


Nah, just walk into the bedroom sporting the strap-on, wearing a leather bustier and spike heels, and say "mamma is comin' for a visit":rofl:


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## lost_Alone (Aug 25, 2014)

It could also be possible that he bought it for another woman he picked up and instead of having sex with her, he had her masterbate while he watched?? 

It is also possible that he likes anal stimulation. A lot of strait men like it. It has nothing to do with being gay!


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## Rugs (Apr 12, 2013)

I think it's for another female. To me it makes the most sense.

Keep quiet and start snooping.


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## Rugs (Apr 12, 2013)

Oh, and VAR his truck


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## clipclop2 (Aug 16, 2013)

Nothing from the OP. must be bad news.


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## larky (Nov 27, 2009)

Some times I have the most creative mind when it comes to making a funny comment


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