# Best books about abuse / healing



## CarrieAnn (Mar 25, 2011)

Can any of you who have been through an abusive marriage recommend books about recognizing abuse for what it is (particularly when it is not physical abuse) and recognizing and stopping patterns of behavior that cause you to allow abuse?

I've seen so many posts around these forums from people who so clearly state what I am going through. I just need some more in depth information. I don't have an opportunity to read online resources much, so a book is my best resource. I can carry it with me and read when I have time.

Thanks so much.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

A really scarily spot-on book on abuse is _Why Does He Do That?_ by Lundy Bancroft.

If you have been in an abusive relationship, it will give you chills once you realize how very calculated abusers are. 

Get it at the library (free) or bookstore STAT.

The only way abuse stops is:

1. the abuser owns what they are doing is wrong and gets help for it and commits to changing the behavior or
2. you leave


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## CarrieAnn (Mar 25, 2011)

Thank you!


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

No problem  It's sort of considered the bible of abusive relationship books. LOL And it's very insightful.


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## credamdóchasgra (Sep 24, 2010)

The Verbally Abusive Relationship by Patricia Evans is also good.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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