# Anybody like anal sex and if so, how long did it take you to find the right approach?



## marcopoly69 (Sep 7, 2010)

I have it about once a week (or 10 days) and it is only okay since my wife cannot fully get rid off the pain. I've read that practice make perfect and I planning to really slow it down and try different suggestions such as using a little toy while we make vaginal love making so she can get used to that and enjoy some form of DP. The next thing, I am planing to do once we are about to have anal sex is to let her control how deep it goes....crossing my fingers that at some point she'll want everything and obviously that both can finish in a powerful orgasm....

Any experiences like this?? any lady here that did the work until finding the perfect approach to it? - please advise!


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## crystal226 (Sep 21, 2010)

I think the bottom line is that some women will never enjoy anal sex so if she is fine to keep trying cool, but I wouldn't count on her ever enjoying. I, however, over time was able to enjoy it. The secret really is about relaxation and lots of lube. For me the way that seems to work best is lying on my side in a spooning position (I find any other position too intense). I take control of his penis and am very relaxed and slow about it at first. It also helps if she pushes out gently while you enter her because of the sphincter muscle involved. Hope that helps. Have fun!


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## toolate (Sep 22, 2009)

marcopoly69 said:


> I have it about once a week (or 10 days) and it is only okay since my wife cannot fully get rid off the pain. I've read that practice make perfect and I planning to really slow it down and try different suggestions such as using a little toy while we make vaginal love making so she can get used to that and enjoy some form of DP. The next thing, I am planing to do once we are about to have anal sex is to let her control how deep it goes....crossing my fingers that at some point she'll want everything and obviously that both can finish in a powerful orgasm....
> 
> Any experiences like this?? any lady here that did the work until finding the perfect approach to it? - please advise!


I never thought I would even try it, let alone like it, but I really do enjoy it. The way for me to enjoy it is complete trust in my partner, lots of lubrication, slight intoxication and patience to go slow until I say it was ok to go at a regular pace and get into it a little. Even then, not going to deep... but that is up to the woman to control with muscles and positioning I really miss it, but I dont trust my husband anymore so I cant relax enough

I hope you get to a place where you both enjoy it.


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## marcopoly69 (Sep 7, 2010)

so to relax you need time and stimulation.....trust and patients....and she needs to be in control....I'll try all these things next time...but still I am nerves since she's never had an orgasm when trying anal so if she wants to have an orgasm (usually she has two in our love making sessions but the second one - when I finish with her is the most powerful of them all) so she is not very willing to give that up - I understand it since I would do the same....that's why I am so obsessed in trying to find out what to do to maker her cum during anal.....next time though, I'll try putting a toy there and then letting her be in total control...I'll let you know later is my dream come true o more work needs to be done....


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## marcopoly69 (Sep 7, 2010)

Thanks and I think I need to be as gentle as I can be and take the time and let her to be in control.....to be able to feel the woman I love enjoy it and perhaps have an orgasm from it, would be a fantasy and dream come true....I just need her to love everything we do together....


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## toolate (Sep 22, 2009)

marcopoly69 said:


> so to relax you need time and stimulation.....trust and patients....and she needs to be in control....I'll try all these things next time...but still I am nerves since she's never had an orgasm when trying anal so if she wants to have an orgasm (usually she has two in our love making sessions but the second one - when I finish with her is the most powerful of them all) so she is not very willing to give that up - I understand it since I would do the same....that's why I am so obsessed in trying to find out what to do to maker her cum during anal.....next time though, I'll try putting a toy there and then letting her be in total control...I'll let you know later is my dream come true o more work needs to be done....



Wait, I think you misunderstood what I meant by lubrication... bottle lube, not natural which will dry out too quickly. Lots of it loaded onto you and spread all over her entrance... back door entrance.


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## Crazytown (Sep 27, 2010)

I need about a bottle of wine and a lot of foreplay. lol.

Plus I need to want to do it. Sometimes, I'm just not interested in that at all and my H respects that. He knows eventually I will be interested in it again.

Also, I don't want to sound gross but my husband licks down there as well. It is a major turn on. He said he never did that with anyone else and it grossed him out at first. But, I'm his W and am clean. Plus, one day he was performing oral and accidently slipped down there a bit lower and my reaction was strong. So, he did it the next time on purpose. He gets off on my reaction so he found a new favorite.

Usually the anal sex starts with the above and then moves to gradual entry. I agree with the above posters about lots of lube too!


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## marcopoly69 (Sep 7, 2010)

Crazytown said:


> I need about a bottle of wine and a lot of foreplay. lol.
> 
> Plus I need to want to do it. Sometimes, I'm just not interested in that at all and my H respects that. He knows eventually I will be interested in it again.
> 
> ...


You are not gross at all, I do that with my wife as much as I can...I would say it is my favorite thing!!....it gets me really on fire!!! and she can't get it enough of it, sometimes I feel like my whole tongue is inside of her, I bite her checks it is unbelievable..you are not gross you are a wonderful woman that allows herself and her man to enjoy life to the fullest...good for you


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## tattoomommy (Aug 14, 2009)

Well, I can't say we've fully tried anal, but we are definitely on the path to it. My H has always wanted to do it and I am doing my best to accommodate his needs! He typically fingers it now when going down on me but it took a while to get to that point. It started with him pressing just above the entrance while going down on me and getting me off. Then it went to pressure on the entrance and eventually fully penetrating. I have to say, he's conditioned me to the point where I actually find myself begging him in my mind to just do it. I have a little problem with pride and since I SWORE I wouldn't even like it a bit, it's our little joke that I say I don't like it and he knows that I love it. We'll get to actual anal sex sometime soon I'm sure though. I would highly recommend gradually getting her conditioned to like it. Word of caution though: DO NOT start to travel south down there until she is just about to come. At that point, she'll be so hot she won't even care, but if you do it too soon, you risk a smack on the head lol. Call me a dog and my H is my Pavlov. I don't care


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## greeneyeddolphin (May 31, 2010)

Definitely lots of lube and lots of trust. 

I would never do it before I met my boyfriend. I was a "that's an exit only" kinda girl. lol But then I met my boyfriend and he would just kind of play around back there a little, grabbing my butt and stuff and it really turned me on. One night he asked me what was something I wanted to try and never had, and I indicated anal. He was very patient, very slow, reassuring. He kept making sure I was relaxed and ok with it, not in pain, etc. 

I would never have been able to do it if I didn't trust him 100%. 

And some women just never really enjoy it. Your wife might be one of them. She seems willing to keep trying, so keep trying. Maybe it'll happen.


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## tourniquet (Sep 29, 2010)

Try drinking heavily. It seems to work for me.


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## marcopoly69 (Sep 7, 2010)

Is it only about relaxing enough so the muscles down there stop closing and causing pain....so if you take time and keep on bieng careful and let her do all the going and out....

is it possible to get to a point where there is no pain and you can actually enjoy to the point of orgasm??


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## Sara Ann (Aug 27, 2010)

I don't think you can have an orgasm from only anal sex. I've read though that anal combined with penis or clitoral stimulation gives more intense orgasms.

We tried for the first time last week in doggie style position, but he was not hard enough to complete, so next time I will wait until he is initiating. It briefly hurt, I asked him to slow down, and from there, he just went in all the way. We used surgical lube from the pharmacy, and I was totally relaxed. No alcohol needed. Just a desire.


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## Lostmind30 (Sep 26, 2010)

About 8 yrs ago, hubby and I hit a dry spell. We were kinda bored in our bedroom life and wanted to spice things up. We both agreed to try something different. At first I was scared, but he made me comfortable with it because we would sit down on the pc and read on tips and techniques. 

He bought a small "down under" toy, anal lube and a vibrator for me. The lube has a desensitizer in it that helps out the process in the beginning. First he started by paying attention to my "top" with his tongue. Then he use the vibrator in me. He next got me used to the idea and feeling of "down under" through the use of his finger. He would first just apply some pressure. Then he progressed to actual insertion. Over a period of about 3 wks he started using the toy and OMG!!! It was mind blowing. 

It took about a month and a half for him to be able to enter me and us both enjoy it, but I have to say there must be a combination of areas being aroused and pleasured for it to really be amazing. Now H has it down pat where he can cause multiple O's from the combination methods. He uses it when he wants to "treat me to something special". 

I have to say it really did help to spice up our bedroom life and has continued to do so. He says that he enjoys it as much as I do. As far as the position, I like them all now, but at first I liked missionary. It allowed him to focus on multiple areas easier and allowed me more control on the depth of penetration. 

Once he was able to enter me, he would "lay down" on me and the pressure from his pelvis on my "top" would combine with "down under" and would make for a powerful O. Hope this may be able to help you out some. Good luck


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## marcopoly69 (Sep 7, 2010)

Lostmind30 said:


> About 8 yrs ago, hubby and I hit a dry spell. We were kinda bored in our bedroom life and wanted to spice things up. We both agreed to try something different. At first I was scared, but he made me comfortable with it because we would sit down on the pc and read on tips and techniques.
> 
> He bought a small "down under" toy, anal lube and a vibrator for me. The lube has a desensitizer in it that helps out the process in the beginning. First he started by paying attention to my "top" with his tongue. Then he use the vibrator in me. He next got me used to the idea and feeling of "down under" through the use of his finger. He would first just apply some pressure. Then he progressed to actual insertion. Over a period of about 3 wks he started using the toy and OMG!!! It was mind blowing.
> 
> ...


Thanks for your answer...it helps a lot. Just shared it with wife. We have tried to do it several times, but not wife can't have orgasms from it..since she enjoys vaginal penetratio, I am thinking in buying a dildo with vibration co make sure I keep her exited when trying anal.....she controling penetration...i just hope some day, I find the right combination of thinks to give her an orgasm that way.....thanks again..


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## Stevenj (Mar 26, 2014)

marcopoly69 said:


> Thanks for your answer...it helps a lot. Just shared it with wife. We have tried to do it several times, but not wife can't have orgasms from it..since she enjoys vaginal penetratio, I am thinking in buying a dildo with vibration co make sure I keep her exited when trying anal.....she controling penetration...i just hope some day, I find the right combination of thinks to give her an orgasm that way.....thanks again..


:smthumbup:


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## TopsyTurvy5 (Nov 16, 2013)

My take- I have had anal sex with several women, and to be honest some like it and some don't. Much of it has to do with physical aspect of you and the woman (her size, your size). I also have found that for many women it is a taboo thing that they just can't get comfortable with.

Of course you could be like some men on this board and thank God every single day that ANY woman wants to have sex with you. Sigh...

Anyways, if she is game to continue trying, I would recommend a butt plug to help get her ready for you. I would also make sure she has had one or more orgasms before you proceed to anal. And listen to her if she says it hurts, slow down, etc... Anal sex requires a LOT of trust on the woman's part, so respect her wishes.


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## Coffee Amore (Dec 15, 2011)

Zombie thread....


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