# How to start a rejection conversation with unwanted sexual offer?



## angel baby (Mar 11, 2013)

Recently on Facebook chat, a married male classmate asking me about my single life style. We were close and there were information that I had disclose to him such as several one night stands I had. He was asking me about how to go about having one night stands, if I am willing to send him a picture of me in a hot tub to his cell/email, and if I ca have a one night stand with him. I rejected this and told him that it is his wife and his decisions on how their marriage should run. I also told him that there are things that I will not discuss through facebook, texts, and similar electronic devices due to its "copy and paste" information. I left the chat conversation as that. Now attending class is awkward because of this conversation. Due to how small our cohort is, I can't find a place in a classroom to talk with him nor talking in the hallway will be good because people will often wonder in the random conversations. I would like to tell this classmate in person how uncomfortable it was for me and his offer with one night stands will be forever denied. I obviously do not want to meet him for lunch somewhere cause that might give him the wrong idea. Any suggestions of how and where to start this conversation? I would like to keep it civil because we have classes together.


----------



## YinPrincess (Jul 31, 2011)

Perhaps you can arrange to meet him before class? Or catch him after class and the two of you can find a private place to speak? (Perhaps outside if there is a nice, calm area)? I'm not sure where else you can speak with him that is private and at the school... 

He put you in a pretty awkward position... I'd be uncomfortable even seeing him after that, lol!

As far as starting the conversation, I would just be direct and blunt... "The other night when you asked me about... Blah blah blah" Just tell him how you feel, but be nice and exercise sensitivity... And... You said this guy is married? I'm hoping I misunderstood that part... :/

If it were me, I'd even forward the chat to his wife, if I knew who she was. Not sure about how that would maintain civility, though...
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

This makes me die - he's the one behaving inappropriately and you're the one feeling guilty and trying to keep things civil. Personally I would delete him from FB, tell him he's totally inappropriate and wouldn't care if I never spoke to him again. I can blank someone with the best of them. If you have to speak to him as part of your class then so be it. You don't have to be friends. 

He'll get the message soon enough.


----------



## Toffer (Jan 31, 2012)

Why in God's name would you want to have a conversation with this jerk?

I'd actually go out of my way to avoid any and all contact with this guy!

Oh and by the way, if he tries ANYTHING again, tell his wife what he's up to. I'm sure she'd be interested


----------



## Deejo (May 20, 2008)

You can have that conversation without ever uttering a word. Body language, indifferent responses, and purposeful avoidance come to mind.

So lets cut to the chase, his asking, and your responding to questions regarding your sex life can't lead anywhere good.

He doesn't want to be your 'friend'. He wants to have sex with you. Period.


----------



## ScarletBegonias (Jun 26, 2012)

how about "the next time you approach me in an inappropriate way,your wife will know all about the questions you've been asking me. Have a great day!! see you in class!!"


----------



## inarut (Feb 9, 2013)

You already rejected him. Why do you feel the need to have some big discussion over it? Do you think he is unaware of the inappropriateness of his request or that he doesnt understand your reasons for saying no? He isnt. You dont owe him any further explanation...or anything else for that matter.


----------



## ravioli (Jan 23, 2013)

Why would you discuss sexual history with a married man? There's a reason why he asked you for a one night stand. What do you mean you were close?

See this is the problem with some women that play the naive role. You have some responsibility in how this man brazenly asked you for a sexual pic and a one night stand. You gave him the vibes, but like a fool he went from 0-60, fumbled the players handbook and it caught you off guard. The situation should have never happened from the jump.

You don't have to start the conversation. Stop dealing with this man. He ONLY saw you as a one night stand. He doesn't even want you as a mistress, just a one night stand.


----------

