# Wow, it's already been a year with no sex



## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

I just realized it's been that long. It makes me really sad. I really liked sex with STBXH - I think we were very sexually compatible. I thought we had some really deep connections, too, but all of the things he's said in the course of splitting up has thrown everything into doubt. 

I never thought I would go this long again without sex. I hate it that in many ways I don't even care. I feel like my body has forgotten what it feels like. When I first moved out, I could get aroused by STBXH, or even reading erotica. THat hasn't happened for months and months. Now I just feel like it's over forever, and that part of me just has to be dead, like it was when I was living with my mom and taking care of her, before I met STBXH. I can't see anyone finding me attractive, if STBXH was able to dump me so thoroughly, when we share a son, so much history, etc. I just turned 47. Things are not going to get better. I don't even bother looking at men. What's the point? 

I just kind of feel like the rest of my life is going to be taking care of my son, which will be less and less as he gets older, working to scrape by until I die (no retirement that I can see), and just doing 'things' and staying active to hang in there til things get better. Then one day I'll be 80 or something, and I'll be on my deathbed realizing that they never did. I really really miss that intimate connection with another person. I'm so jealous that STBXH is already moving on to having that with another woman, and this time it will be physical for sure.


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## Freak On a Leash (Feb 19, 2010)

Wow..that's so pessimistic. You have to heal and get over your marriage and eventually things WILL get better. You'll stop caring about the Ex. It will happen. You need to get engaged and enjoy LIFE again! It's not all about your marriage and relationships! There's lots of things you can do aside from all that. There's a whole world waiting for you. Just go out and enjoy it! 

Life is a banquet and most people are starving to death..don't be one of them!

In the meantime look for some sex toys to keep you physically satisfied. No, it's the same but at least you can roll over and go to sleep and not feel guilty.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

I guess time flies when you are not having any fun... so sorry


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## phaber6 (Mar 15, 2012)

....hey, I went for 14 months once and thru the whole time the only woman that touched me was the girl that cut my hair. Having her that close was really something. I maintained a no. 1 thru the whole time

Elegirl, don't wanta hitch the thread but I wrote response to your query re my son under the baby loss thread, this has been a big issue for me, like to know what you see in it....


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## Nsweet (Mar 3, 2012)

It's been over a year for me as well. The sex we had before was ok at best, but it seemed she was just going through the motions before she left. This was back on new years of last year on her bedroom floor, because her POS bed was too noisy:smthumbup:.

The odd thing was the claimed it was incredible when we we're talking after filing. I take pride in my sex a couldn't help but feel insulted because I've been better. What hurts was that she wanted to talk about it to mentally compare me with what sex with the OM would seem like. I'm a psych nerd, not an idiot!

I'm still not ready to move on and I guess like you angelpixie I still carry a torch for my spouse. I can't bring myself to go out and get laid and cheat on our marriage or get my rocks off. I've had my chances but something deep down kept me from sinking so low. I've got two fleshlights for that need and enough self respect to not be a cheater:rofl:.

At least I can say I never cheated.


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## phaber6 (Mar 15, 2012)

Hey,

Sure its been a year with no sex...BUT

...its been a year without maybe the rows, arguaments
...maybe a year of feeling lonely in bed with the other person next to you
...a year free of of suspecting you've been cheated on

I'm really trying to not reinvent the relationship I had as what I'm currently missing. I find this helps.


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## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

funnily enough it's not the sex I miss - the very few times we've done it over the past year or two frankly have been boring and I've wanted to get it over with

I want to get my hot body back and then go and test it out on some lucky guy ha ha ha


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## angelpixie (Mar 2, 2012)

phaber6 said:


> ....hey, I went for 14 months once and thru the whole time the only woman that touched me was the girl that cut my hair. Having her that close was really something. I maintained a no. 1 thru the whole time


On Halloween, when I was still in my 'sassy' phase, I went to a screening of Rocky Horror Picture Show -- by myself, in costume. NEVER done anything like that before: blond wig, red fishnets, corset, rhumba pants and high-heeled lace-up tennis shoe boots I found at a garage sale.  I can't believe I actually did that! But, anyway, during the song Toucha Toucha Toucha Touch Me, the 'hosts' of the screening went to everyone and were giving silly little shoulder & neck massages to the audience members. I realized it was the first time in 6 months that I had been touched on my shoulders or neck, much less massaged. That contact felt so good -- then I had to remember that I was getting mine from a very tall guy in Dr. Frankenfurter drag - wig, lingerie, make-up, the whole thing. I thought that was bizarrely hilarious. :rofl:


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## Nsweet (Mar 3, 2012)

angelpixie said:


> On Halloween, when I was still in my 'sassy' phase, I went to a screening of Rocky Horror Picture Show -- by myself, in costume. NEVER done anything like that before: blond wig, red fishnets, corset, rhumba pants and high-heeled lace-up tennis shoe boots I found at a garage sale.  I can't believe I actually did that! But, anyway, during the song Toucha Toucha Toucha Touch Me, the 'hosts' of the screening went to everyone and were giving silly little shoulder & neck massages to the audience members. I realized it was the first time in 6 months that I had been touched on my shoulders or neck, much less massaged. That contact felt so good -- then I had to remember that I was getting mine from a very tall guy in Dr. Frankenfurter drag - wig, lingerie, make-up, the whole thing. I thought that was bizarrely hilarious. :rofl:


You must of been quite the science fiction double feature, eh.:rofl:


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## nice777guy (Nov 23, 2009)

angelpixie said:


> On Halloween, when I was still in my 'sassy' phase, I went to a screening of Rocky Horror Picture Show -- by myself, in costume. NEVER done anything like that before: blond wig, red fishnets, corset, rhumba pants and high-heeled lace-up tennis shoe boots I found at a garage sale.  I can't believe I actually did that! But, anyway, during the song Toucha Toucha Toucha Touch Me, the 'hosts' of the screening went to everyone and were giving silly little shoulder & neck massages to the audience members. I realized it was the first time in 6 months that I had been touched on my shoulders or neck, much less massaged. That contact felt so good -- then I had to remember that I was getting mine from a very tall guy in Dr. Frankenfurter drag - wig, lingerie, make-up, the whole thing. I thought that was bizarrely hilarious. :rofl:


That is so cool!!! Sounds like a blast! And took some guts to do that all alone too - be proud of yourself for getting out and having some fun!

My personal opinion is that most women grossly underestimate how attractive they are. But even then - you have to be ready to be rejected a time or two - as everyone has different taste.

Been about 9 months for me - without that basic "touch" - very hard to deal with - but I'm hopefully it will happen when the time is right.


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## canguy66 (Dec 18, 2011)

angelpixie said:


> On Halloween, when I was still in my 'sassy' phase, I went to a screening of Rocky Horror Picture Show -- by myself, in costume. NEVER done anything like that before: blond wig, red fishnets, corset, rhumba pants and high-heeled lace-up tennis shoe boots I found at a garage sale.  I can't believe I actually did that! But, anyway, during the song Toucha Toucha Toucha Touch Me, the 'hosts' of the screening went to everyone and were giving silly little shoulder & neck massages to the audience members. I realized it was the first time in 6 months that I had been touched on my shoulders or neck, much less massaged. That contact felt so good -- then I had to remember that I was getting mine from a very tall guy in Dr. Frankenfurter drag - wig, lingerie, make-up, the whole thing. I thought that was bizarrely hilarious. :rofl:


I think I love you.


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## jpr (Dec 14, 2011)

Wow, Angel! I can't believe you think that your life is over...but you are willing to dress up on go to Rocky Horror BY YOURSELF! wow. You are my hero. 

You are so strong, and you obviously have the ability and guts to build yourself a wonderful and exciting new life. Don't sell yourself short. You rock!


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