# Husband views porn almost daily and denies it



## Arianna (Apr 1, 2009)

I love my husband of almost 30 yrs. very much and can't visualize life without him; however his almost daily porn viewing hurts, humiliates and denigrates our relationship as he lies about it. I can understand we are up in age (retired) me since 2 yrs. he since 8 yrs. I try to stay slender and take care of my appearance but an elderly lady 65 yrs. is what it is and I really feel confortable with who I am - nevertheless I feel hurt when he almost daily watches porn featuring 18 year olds and then he gets turned on and wants sex or he masturbates when I am not home. He tells me his sex drive is natural heightened by Flomax which makes one impotent to top it all off! Why does he insult my intelligence with his lies. This is not retirement he is 68 yrs. old and is very proud of his sexual prowess. He puts down the people who take Viagra and hates the viagra and Cialis ads. Isn't he doing the same thing with his porn viewing??? This has been going on for 5 years, I went for counselling which did not help (he refuses to go says he has no problem) I tried talking to him in a non confrontentional way with kindness and love, he just does not see any problem. He says he loves me and does not see any problem. His position is what you do not know won't hurt you. I beg to difer...
I talked to him about it lovingly, explained how it affects me, and he says he won't do it but continues to do it on a regular basis almost daily ( he walks in the living room pardon my french with an erection) and says it is caused by me when I have proof that he is watching Keez Movies and all sorts of porn ... it is especially the lying that hurts. I am at my wit's end - how can I save my marriage short of living parallel lives... that would be sooo sad!
Please share your thoughts and experiences. With appreciation and thank you so much in advance for your help.
Arianna


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## revitalizedhusband (Feb 9, 2009)

If its something that bothers you (obviously does) then it needs to stop somehow.

One question I have, is how often are the two of you having sex? Is it at least a few times a week? 

What was it like 5 years ago when this porn addiction started?


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## sarah63 (Apr 5, 2009)

I think a little bit more information would help people to give some sort of advice as revitalizedhusband suggests. However I do believe that if this bothers you, you need to talk to you husband again and try to find some professional help, even if he denies the problem. After 30 years of marriage he should be able to realize that this is harming your marriage.


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## oceanbreeze (Oct 8, 2007)

you could recommend a book to him called "Every Man's Battle" it's a christian's perspective and approach to men who are addicted to pornography.


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