# First session yesterday



## beachbummed

I think it went okay, but then again my husband was the one who has agreed to make some big changes. Not sure how he will feel about it over time. 

I had problems with his drinking and parties. The counselor said if the partner feels that the drinking is a problem--it usually is. He's not quitting drinking, but is not going out drinking with his friends any more. I didn't have a problem with it until he was staying out really late, not coming home, going to house parties with his 20 year old co workers and ect. Just couldn't deal with waiting up late worried.... Started to make me have trust issues and make me depressed.

We were given homework to spend 2 nights a week alone together after our kids go to bed. This is time where I can communicate with him and spend time with him. This has always been a big issue for us. We don't communicate well aout anything in general and don't understand eachother.

I was told I worry to much and that I need to find more of a middle ground so I don't drive myself crazy. I honestly have gotten better about this.... just lately there has been many stressers. My family of 7 has been displaced for 3 months do to water damage of our home. That has kinda magnified some of the other issues that were on going.

My oldest son said that I seemed happy yesterday. He says lately I have a glare on my face  Usually I can push the stress aside and focus on my kids. This is the first time I have ever felt depressed and couldn't get my head out of the fog. Makes me sad that it was noticable to him.

We see her again in a week to report our progress... I hope we can grow closer and both remain happy.


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## Blanca

beachbummed said:


> We were given homework to spend 2 nights a week alone together after our kids go to bed. This is time where I can communicate with him and spend time with him. This has always been a big issue for us. We don't communicate well aout anything in general and don't understand eachother.


Congrats  I hope things improve for you. 

I would only suggest that you be mindful of how much you try and communicate with him. Pay very close attention to how you feel when you're trying to talk to him. If you feel restless, irritated, anxious, angry, and especially if you feel unheard it is a sign that you need to stop talking.


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