# Husband is having emotional affair. HELP



## EmotionalErica

Is there anyone out there that can give me advice in how to confront my husband. I have proof. I don't know where to even start. I have researched and it says that I do not want him to know all the evidence I have on him.... 17 years of marriage. If anyone has time I would love to ask questions and pick your brain.
Thanks


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## bobert

An important factor is whether you plan to stay, divorce, or are undecided.


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## Diana7

Can you give a little more detail? How long has it been going on for. Are you sure it's not physical. How did you find out etc


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## TexasMom1216

Before you do anything, get your ducks in a row. Get your own bank accounts, your own credit cards, make sure your name is on the mortgage, all that kind of thing. Especially if you have kids at home, you will need to make sure your finances are safe. You'll have enough to deal with, having to stress about groceries and a roof over your head is just going to be too much. @Diana7 is right, more details are needed.


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## EmotionalErica

bobert said:


> An important factor is whether you plan to stay, divorce, or are undecided.


I would love to make it work however I don't think he is going to see any problem with his actions. If he doesn't see a problem then nothing will change. Otherwise undecided.


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## EmotionalErica

Diana7 said:


> Can you give a little more detail? How long has it been going on for. Are you sure it's not physical. How did you find out etc


Talking to several different women during the day when he is at work however he is so busy at work during the day that he has to go back in the evening and stay till 2 or 3 am. Onetime I had to call him to come home so I could go to work..
I do not know if it has physically cheated or not. I don't have any evidence of that. Very flirtatious with some. Telling our young neighbor that she is hot, requesting pictures of her in her cute outfit. Things that are not appropriate at all in my opinion!!
I found out by finding a message on his phone 1 year ago.


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## Diana7

EmotionalErica said:


> Talking to several different women during the day when he is at work however he is so busy at work during the day that he has to go back in the evening and stay till 2 or 3 am. Onetime I had to call him to come home so I could go to work..
> I do not know if it has physically cheated or not. I don't have any evidence of that. Very flirtatious with some. Telling our young neighbor that she is hot, requesting pictures of her in her cute outfit. Things that are not appropriate at all in my opinion!!
> I found out by finding a message on his phone 1 year ago.


Are you sure he is going back to work till the early hours in the morning?

What sort of messages is he sending to these women? Has he always been a flirt?


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## TexasMom1216

.


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## EmotionalErica

Diana7 said:


> Are you sure he is going back to work till the early hours in the morning?
> 
> What sort of messages is he sending to these women? Has he always been a flirt?


He is going back into work. Now who comes to his body shop while he is at work is another question. I know his dad and his friend goes when he goes. I'm pretty sure they would see no problem with his flirting if something were to take place. 
He has low self confidence although can be very out going once he gets to know someone. Last year it was a message with a girl, whom was going through a divorce because she cheated on her husband. Him asking her what she got him for Christmas, saying she deserves to be spoiled, asking if she is ready to go get a drink, and how he would have wrapped himself up for her for Christmas... I confronted him flat out asked if he was cheating, he denied everything. Although when I asked to see his phone he let me have it and I went directly to messenger and asked how he didn't see this as an issue. His response "we are just friends". He finally grabbed his phone away from me and I grabbed it back. He took it back and said he had to get into work to get a vehicle finished. I knew he was going into work however this in my opinion took priority! I tried to get him to leave me his phone and he could take mine. Wouldn't do it. He told me I could come to the shop and look at his phone at any time. Am I supposed to leave our 9 year old at home alone so I could go through it.... I told him that if he walked out if this house things would change forever. 
He left the house. 
Recently with our 25 yr old neighbor he has been extremely flirtatious with her. Testing the water to see if she will basically say okay I think he would really have a physical relationship with her. Commenting on how hot she is, and he enjoys seeing her in person, asking if he should get out his binoculars so he can see her out her window, wanting to know what she is going to show him, him taking a hot bath with bubbles asking if she's going to come over, asking if her husband is home, saying she is his hit girlfriend, etc. Keep in mind they both have discussed on how they delete the messages they exchange so no one will find out... If you aren't doing anything wrong why delete them??? 
Another one was a waitress and he would text her saying how he needs to see his favorite waitress soon. 
Another is his friends wife wanting to know where his picture is, he tells her she would for sure get a modeling contract cause she's so hot. She mentioned him coming to see her daughter and he says he's never invited. She says you don't need an invite and my husband says not unless your husband is not there, with a ton of emoji smile faces.
Others aren't so forward. It's just him checking in to see how they are doing today. 
Thanks so much for responding to me! I don't think you know how much it means to me!


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## TexasMom1216

I can't not respond here, sorry moderators. Honey, he's cheating on you. And lying to you. And doing it in front of you and then telling you that you're not seeing what you're clearly seeing. This isn't an emotional affair. I don't even think these are affairs, these aren't relationships. He's sleeping around. You need a lawyer, ASAP. I wouldn't say anything at all. Get your affairs in order and make SURE you have a support system, someplace SAFE you can go when you tell him you're done. Please be so so careful.


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## EmotionalErica

EmotionalErica said:


> He is going back into work. Now who comes to his body shop while he is at work is another question. I know his dad and his friend goes when he goes. I'm pretty sure they would see no problem with his flirting if something were to take place.
> He has low self confidence although can be very out going once he gets to know someone. Last year it was a message with a girl, whom was going through a divorce because she cheated on her husband. Him asking her what she got him for Christmas, saying she deserves to be spoiled, asking if she is ready to go get a drink, and how he would have wrapped himself up for her for Christmas... I confronted him flat out asked if he was cheating, he denied everything. Although when I asked to see his phone he let me have it and I went directly to messenger and asked how he didn't see this as an issue. His response "we are just friends". He finally grabbed his phone away from me and I grabbed it back. He took it back and said he had to get into work to get a vehicle finished. I knew he was going into work however this in my opinion took priority! I tried to get him to leave me his phone and he could take mine. Wouldn't do it. He told me I could come to the shop and look at his phone at any time. Am I supposed to leave our 9 year old at home alone so I could go through it.... I told him that if he walked out if this house things would change forever.
> He left the house.
> Recently with our 25 yr old neighbor he has been extremely flirtatious with her. Testing the water to see if she will basically say okay I think he would really have a physical relationship with her. Commenting on how hot she is, and he enjoys seeing her in person, asking if he should get out his binoculars so he can see her out her window, wanting to know what she is going to show him, him taking a hot bath with bubbles asking if she's going to come over, asking if her husband is home, saying she is his hit girlfriend, etc. Keep in mind they both have discussed on how they delete the messages they exchange so no one will find out... If you aren't doing anything wrong why delete them???
> Another one was a waitress and he would text her saying how he needs to see his favorite waitress soon.
> Another is his friends wife wanting to know where his picture is, he tells her she would for sure get a modeling contract cause she's so hot. She mentioned him coming to see her daughter and he says he's never invited. She says you don't need an invite and my husband says not unless your husband is not there, with a ton of emoji smile faces.
> Others aren't so forward. It's just him checking in to see how they are doing today.
> Thanks so much for responding to me! I don't think you know how much it means to me!


Oh, this is WAY out of character for him. It would be different if he didn't know these girls, and is never going to meet them. He knows all of them and so do I!!!


TexasMom1216 said:


> I can't not respond here, sorry moderators. Honey, he's cheating on you. And lying to you. And doing it in front of you and then telling you that you're not seeing what you're clearly seeing. This isn't an emotional affair. I don't even think these are affairs, these aren't relationships. He's sleeping around. You need a lawyer, ASAP. I wouldn't say anything at all. Get your affairs in order and make SURE you have a support system, someplace SAFE you can go when you tell him you're done. Please be so so careful.


Not what I wanted to hear although I need to hear the truth. I have ALWAYS said " if you don't have trust in a relationship then you have nothing". Never been in this situation till now and I feel like I'm eating my words, if that makes any sense. Bit I still believe it!
Thanks


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## Diana7

EmotionalErica said:


> He is going back into work. Now who comes to his body shop while he is at work is another question. I know his dad and his friend goes when he goes. I'm pretty sure they would see no problem with his flirting if something were to take place.
> He has low self confidence although can be very out going once he gets to know someone. Last year it was a message with a girl, whom was going through a divorce because she cheated on her husband. Him asking her what she got him for Christmas, saying she deserves to be spoiled, asking if she is ready to go get a drink, and how he would have wrapped himself up for her for Christmas... I confronted him flat out asked if he was cheating, he denied everything. Although when I asked to see his phone he let me have it and I went directly to messenger and asked how he didn't see this as an issue. His response "we are just friends". He finally grabbed his phone away from me and I grabbed it back. He took it back and said he had to get into work to get a vehicle finished. I knew he was going into work however this in my opinion took priority! I tried to get him to leave me his phone and he could take mine. Wouldn't do it. He told me I could come to the shop and look at his phone at any time. Am I supposed to leave our 9 year old at home alone so I could go through it.... I told him that if he walked out if this house things would change forever.
> He left the house.
> Recently with our 25 yr old neighbor he has been extremely flirtatious with her. Testing the water to see if she will basically say okay I think he would really have a physical relationship with her. Commenting on how hot she is, and he enjoys seeing her in person, asking if he should get out his binoculars so he can see her out her window, wanting to know what she is going to show him, him taking a hot bath with bubbles asking if she's going to come over, asking if her husband is home, saying she is his hit girlfriend, etc. Keep in mind they both have discussed on how they delete the messages they exchange so no one will find out... If you aren't doing anything wrong why delete them???
> Another one was a waitress and he would text her saying how he needs to see his favorite waitress soon.
> Another is his friends wife wanting to know where his picture is, he tells her she would for sure get a modeling contract cause she's so hot. She mentioned him coming to see her daughter and he says he's never invited. She says you don't need an invite and my husband says not unless your husband is not there, with a ton of emoji smile faces.
> Others aren't so forward. It's just him checking in to see how they are doing today.
> Thanks so much for responding to me! I don't think you know how much it means to me!


You and I both know that a married man shouldn't be acting this way. The trouble is what to do about it. 
He knows that you are very unhappy about it but still carries on. 

One alternative is to tell his best friend about the messages between your husband and his wife, and the neighbours husband as well, but the trouble is that he would probably just find other women to flirt with. 

It's a shame that the women dont tell him to stop, but they seem to encourage it. 

You could give him the choice between your marriage or the other women. Sometimes it takes such drastic action to get a person to stop what they are doing, but you would have the be prepared to end the marriage. Has he always been this way?.


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## TexasMom1216

EmotionalErica said:


> Not what I wanted to hear although I need to hear the truth. I have ALWAYS said " if you don't have trust in a relationship then you have nothing". Never been in this situation till now and I feel like I'm eating my words, if that makes any sense. Bit I still believe it!
> Thanks


 I’m so so sorry. Please PLEASE know, this is HIS problem. There is nothing in the world wrong with you, you didn’t do anything wrong. He made these choices on his own and he is a bad person for what he’s done. You are completely right, no trust, nothing else matters. You be strong and keep us posted on how you’re doing.


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## EmotionalErica

TexasMom1216 said:


> I’m so so sorry. Please PLEASE know, this is HIS problem. There is nothing in the world wrong with you, you didn’t do anything wrong. He made these choices on his own and he is a bad person for what he’s done. You are completely right, no trust, nothing else matters. You be strong and keep us posted on how you’re doing.


Thank you!!!!


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## Blondilocks

EmotionalErica said:


> He has low self confidence


Really? A person with low self confidence doesn't act like a hooker. Nothing like being married to a man *****. You don't need to provide proof that he is cheating. All you need is the ability to tell your spouse that you don't want to be married to a guy who acts like a pathetic horn-dog with his tongue hanging out whenever he sees another woman. Those women see him as pathetic, also. What an embarrassment he is to you and to himself.


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## Anastasia6

This is absolutely unacceptable. My guess is he has cheated. If he hasn't he is fishing. He is trying to see if anyone will bite. If he hasn't cheated it is only because he hasn't found a skank who will screw him yet.

What do you mean it is WAY out of character? Is this new behavior? How's your own sex life? communication and such? What is your marriage like. It seems empty if he's doing this much 'work'. He most likely is just ditching home for something he wants to do. His friends hanging out 'at work'. I'd question how much work is he really getting done and how are you sure he's at his shop and not a bar?

Have you check phone bills? credit cards? and if he is the owner of the body shop a lot of non insurance work can be cash.


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## Beach123

EmotionalErica said:


> Oh, this is WAY out of character for him. It would be different if he didn't know these girls, and is never going to meet them. He knows all of them and so do I!!!
> 
> Not what I wanted to hear although I need to hear the truth. I have ALWAYS said " if you don't have trust in a relationship then you have nothing". Never been in this situation till now and I feel like I'm eating my words, if that makes any sense. Bit I still believe it!
> Thanks


why don’t you divorce him? You don’t have a marriage.


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## BigDaddyNY

EmotionalErica said:


> Talking to several different women during the day when he is at work however he is so busy at work during the day that he has to go back in the evening and stay till 2 or 3 am. Onetime I had to call him to come home so I could go to work..
> I do not know if it has physically cheated or not. I don't have any evidence of that. Very flirtatious with some. Telling our young neighbor that she is hot, requesting pictures of her in her cute outfit. Things that are not appropriate at all in my opinion!!
> I found out by finding a message on his phone 1 year ago.


These are affairs he is having, period. Flirtatious talk/text between a married man and another woman is cheating. I would be really surprised if he hasn't physically cheated and I would bet big on him jumping at an opportunity from one of these flirting partners to take it to the next level. How is your marriage otherwise and are you regularly intimate?

Given that you have already confronted him about this in the past and nothing changed I don't see how you can fix it without taking a hard stance. It either stops or the marriage is over. Sometimes you have to be willing to end the marriage in order to fix it. Personally I would tell him that if he wants to stay married all non-work related communication with the opposite sex stops, you get full access to his phone or any other communication device and he can't delete anything without you seeing it first. Seems harsh, but bottom line he is a cheater and can't be trusted. It may also be worth asking him to take a polygraph to prove he hasn't physically cheated on you. 

Honestly I don't see how your neighbor doesn't think he is a creepy "old" guy hitting on her and telling him to stop.


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## Trident

EmotionalErica said:


> confronted him flat out asked if he was cheating, he denied everything.


I will never understand why betrayed spouses confront their cheating partners, especially without solid evidence.

Of course he denied it. What do you expect him to say "Yes honey I'm screwing the neighbor"?


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## CrAzYdOgLaDy

His behaviour is creepy, especially him wanting to watch her through binoculars. He's acting creepy and desperate, and he's embarrassing. Do the husbands, partners of these women know what's going on? Sorry he is doing this. It's actually disgusting.


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## Ldziesinski

EmotionalErica said:


> Is there anyone out there that can give me advice in how to confront my husband. I have proof. I don't know where to even start. I have researched and it says that I do not want him to know all the evidence I have on him.... 17 years of marriage. If anyone has time I would love to ask questions and pick your brain.
> Thanks


What kind of proof if you dont mind me asking? Found out my husband was doing the same 3 weeks ago.


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## EmotionalErica

Diana7 said:


> You and I both know that a married man shouldn't be acting this way. The trouble is what to do about it.
> He knows that you are very unhappy about it but still carries on.
> 
> One alternative is to tell his best friend about the messages between your husband and his wife, and the neighbours husband as well, but the trouble is that he would probably just find other women to flirt with.
> 
> It's a shame that the women dont tell him to stop, but they seem to encourage it.
> 
> You could give him the choice between your marriage or the other women. Sometimes it takes such drastic action to get a person to stop what they are doing, but you would have the be prepared to end the marriage. Has he always been this way?.


He got Facebook a year ago. That's when it all started. Excuse me for saying it this way but where did he grow these balls to even talk to these girls let alone say the things he is?? Way out of character!!! It doesn't make sense at all and I'm baffled by it. He does not know that I have been on his phone when he falls asleep, going through deleted pictures anything I can find. I log onto his Facebook at different times to see who he is messaging.
I'm not hurt yet, I'm sure that will come at some point?? Now I'm still enraged and obsessed with finding what I can..
I have thought about telling the other parties however I don't know if I want to be responsible for ruining their marriage. Even though I know it has nothing to do with me..
How do I approach him about this, because I have not since I confronted him a year ago? Do I say I heard you have been cheating on me and encourage him to fess up and tell the whole truth?? All I have for proof is emotional. What if there is physical and then he gets by with that.. Heck no! I feel like I'm waiting to see if he would physically cheat on me. Why I'm not sure.
Can counseling fix my trust with him, if I choose that? I have asked him many many times to go to counseling together and he thinks it's a waste of time.
He has also text me 3 things that are out of character. He said " love ya" which he always says I love you, messaged me and said "hey baby what are you doing" in which I messaged him back and asked him if that was meant for me or someone else and he says yes for you, why, and I said because you don't talk that way with me. He then says I would never cheat on you because I love you and I wouldn't have married you if I didn't love you, then he has also called me a turd. Which I know seems odd however he has called 3 of these gals turds as well. Saying " I'm not trying to flirt with you turd, lol", etc. He has never said this to me and now he has said it twice to me...
I would think that if I told him it's me and our son or these gals he would pick us and do anything and everything to change, BUT, I along with others that are close did not see this behavior coming at all. Total craziness and disbelief. Disappointed for sure. I think that if I did not have pictures of his texts on my phone no one would believe me at all.


Blondilocks said:


> Really? A person with low self confidence doesn't act like a hooker. Nothing like being married to a man ***. You don't need to provide proof that he is cheating. All you need is the ability to tell your spouse that you don't want to be married to a guy who acts like a pathetic horn-dog with his tongue hanging out whenever he sees another woman. Those women see him as pathetic, also. What an embarrassment he is to you and to himself.


Okay let me rephrase. He did have low self confidence. In the past 4 months or so he has completely changed. I'm sure the "attention" he is getting from chicks has Brought this out.


Ldziesinski said:


> What kind of proof if you dont mind me asking? Found out my husband was doing the same 3 weeks ago.


I found messages on his phone. Text and through Facebook messenger.


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## Ldziesinski

EmotionalErica said:


> He got Facebook a year ago. That's when it all started. Excuse me for saying it this way but where did he grow these balls to even talk to these girls let alone say the things he is?? Way out of character!!! It doesn't make sense at all and I'm baffled by it. He does not know that I have been on his phone when he falls asleep, going through deleted pictures anything I can find. I log onto his Facebook at different times to see who he is messaging.
> I'm not hurt yet, I'm sure that will come at some point?? Now I'm still enraged and obsessed with finding what I can..
> I have thought about telling the other parties however I don't know if I want to be responsible for ruining their marriage. Even though I know it has nothing to do with me..
> How do I approach him about this, because I have not since I confronted him a year ago? Do I say I heard you have been cheating on me and encourage him to fess up and tell the whole truth?? All I have for proof is emotional. What if there is physical and then he gets by with that.. Heck no! I feel like I'm waiting to see if he would physically cheat on me. Why I'm not sure.
> Can counseling fix my trust with him, if I choose that? I have asked him many many times to go to counseling together and he thinks it's a waste of time.
> He has also text me 3 things that are out of character. He said " love ya" which he always says I love you, messaged me and said "hey baby what are you doing" in which I messaged him back and asked him if that was meant for me or someone else and he says yes for you, why, and I said because you don't talk that way with me. He then says I would never cheat on you because I love you and I wouldn't have married you if I didn't love you, then he has also called me a turd. Which I know seems odd however he has called 3 of these gals turds as well. Saying " I'm not trying to flirt with you turd, lol", etc. He has never said this to me and now he has said it twice to me...
> I would think that if I told him it's me and our son or these gals he would pick us and do anything and everything to change, BUT, I along with others that are close did not see this behavior coming at all. Total craziness and disbelief. Disappointed for sure. I think that if I did not have pictures of his texts on my phone no one would believe me at all.
> 
> Okay let me rephrase. He did have low self confidence. In the past 4 months or so he has completely changed. I'm sure the "attention" he is getting from chicks has Brought this out.
> 
> I found messages on his phone. Text and through Facebook messenger.


Me too. Videos they made each other and work chats. 
I sent them to her husband. We were all friends. Its incredible what people are capable of.


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## Diana7

EmotionalErica said:


> He got Facebook a year ago. That's when it all started. Excuse me for saying it this way but where did he grow these balls to even talk to these girls let alone say the things he is?? Way out of character!!! It doesn't make sense at all and I'm baffled by it. He does not know that I have been on his phone when he falls asleep, going through deleted pictures anything I can find. I log onto his Facebook at different times to see who he is messaging.
> I'm not hurt yet, I'm sure that will come at some point?? Now I'm still enraged and obsessed with finding what I can..
> I have thought about telling the other parties however I don't know if I want to be responsible for ruining their marriage. Even though I know it has nothing to do with me..
> How do I approach him about this, because I have not since I confronted him a year ago? Do I say I heard you have been cheating on me and encourage him to fess up and tell the whole truth?? All I have for proof is emotional. What if there is physical and then he gets by with that.. Heck no! I feel like I'm waiting to see if he would physically cheat on me. Why I'm not sure.
> Can counseling fix my trust with him, if I choose that? I have asked him many many times to go to counseling together and he thinks it's a waste of time.
> He has also text me 3 things that are out of character. He said " love ya" which he always says I love you, messaged me and said "hey baby what are you doing" in which I messaged him back and asked him if that was meant for me or someone else and he says yes for you, why, and I said because you don't talk that way with me. He then says I would never cheat on you because I love you and I wouldn't have married you if I didn't love you, then he has also called me a turd. Which I know seems odd however he has called 3 of these gals turds as well. Saying " I'm not trying to flirt with you turd, lol", etc. He has never said this to me and now he has said it twice to me...
> I would think that if I told him it's me and our son or these gals he would pick us and do anything and everything to change, BUT, I along with others that are close did not see this behavior coming at all. Total craziness and disbelief. Disappointed for sure. I think that if I did not have pictures of his texts on my phone no one would believe me at all.
> 
> Okay let me rephrase. He did have low self confidence. In the past 4 months or so he has completely changed. I'm sure the "attention" he is getting from chicks has Brought this out.
> 
> I found messages on his phone. Text and through Facebook messenger.


People can be 'brave' on line when they aren't in real life.


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## Ldziesinski

Good luck with whatever you do. My husband still denies it even when I play his videos over and over again to him. Morons.


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## EmotionalErica

Ldziesinski said:


> Me too. Videos they made each other and work chats.
> I sent them to her husband. We were all friends. Its incredible what people are capable of.


Has her husband responded back to you? How long have you been married? I agree. You NEVER EVER really know someone. Does he know you sent them?


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## Ldziesinski

EmotionalErica said:


> Has her husband responded back to you? How long have you been married? I agree. You NEVER EVER really know someone. Does he know you sent them?


Oh yes. Weve been married 4 years together almost 11. He does know I sent them - I told him when I first had my suspicions - if you get involved with her - ill tell everyone - your boss included because they are coworkers - and no one heeded my warning.


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## EmotionalErica

Ldziesinski said:


> Oh yes. Weve been married 4 years together almost 11. He does know I sent them - I told him when I first had my suspicions - if you get involved with her - ill tell everyone - your boss included because they are coworkers - and no one heeded my warning.


Is it emotional or has it been physical? How does he act now?


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## Ldziesinski

EmotionalErica said:


> Is it emotional or has it been physical? How does he act now?


He swears they are JUST FRIENDS. Still. lol but to my knowledge just emotional.


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## SunCMars

Sorry...

His day job is hammering fenders, flat and straight out.
His night job is bending women over, and pounding them, till they shout.

Yes, I (obviously) am being too graphic, and so (obviously) is he

This one has to go.


_Nemesis-_


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## EmotionalErica

So what do you plan on doing? Did you give him rules(?) He has to follow in ordered for you to stay? Like full access to his phone, etc? Can you trust him again


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## EmotionalErica

SunCMars said:


> Sorry...
> 
> His day job is hammering fenders, flat and straight out.
> His night job is bending women over, and pounding them, till they shout.
> 
> Yes, I (obviously) am being too graphic, and so (obviously) is he
> 
> This one has to go.
> 
> 
> _Nemesis-_


😱. This is way too funny but not funny, lol. I'm not "hurt" yet still pissed so I can laugh about it.


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## Ldziesinski

EmotionalErica said:


> So what do you plan on doing? Did you give him rules(?) He has to follow in ordered for you to stay? Like full access to his phone, etc? Can you trust him again


We are divorcing. I found messages dating back to 2019. So I wont be sticking around for whats next. Now he says he never loved me in the whole 10 years together. I guess someone made him stay lol.


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## EmotionalErica

Omg! Did you beat the crap out of him? Clearly he's just trying to place blame. Like you held him hostage all those years...


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## Ldziesinski

EmotionalErica said:


> Omg! Did you beat the crap out of him? Clearly he's just trying to place blame. Like you held him hostage all those years...


 I resisted the urge lol


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## EmotionalErica

Ldziesinski said:


> We are divorcing. I found messages dating back to 2019. So I wont be sticking around for whats next. Now he says he never loved me in the whole 10 years together. I guess someone made him stay lol.


So I have another question. How did you approach/confront him about it? Did you ask him questions first to see if he would fess up to you or did you go all in with your proof?
Thanks


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## TexasMom1216

EmotionalErica said:


> So I have another question. How did you approach/confront him about it? Did you ask him questions first to see if he would fess up to you or did you go all in with your proof?
> Thanks


Full disclosure, I've never had a husband get caught cheating on me, but I did catch a live-in fiance cheating.

I didn't offer proof, I didn't confront. I packed and left. He contacted me when he got home asking where I was and I told him to ask his new girlfriend and hung up. I knew, he knew, and I didn't feel that his "explanations" mattered. He lied to me. What's the point in listening to anything he says? He's a liar, it's all a lie, I don't want to hear it and it's not going to change anything. He insisted over and over to mutual friends it wasn't true, but no kidding, who admits that? Whatever. 

That is just me, though. I'm not a huge fan of confrontation, and when I'm done, I'm done.


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## Ldziesinski

EmotionalErica said:


> So I have another question. How did you approach/confront him about it? Did you ask him questions first to see if he would fess up to you or did you go all in with your proof?
> Thanks


One of our friends was there so I said I need to talk to you it’s important he said ok go for it I said well do you wanna do it in front of our friend he said of course so I started from the beginning to catch him up, said this brings us to today, and played the videos for both of them


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