# New to site - Looking for Advice



## Dma8884 (Aug 30, 2019)

My husband is currently in a hospital being treated for depression. Before going into the hospital he was suffering from severe anxiety at work, acting very paranoid, and losing a sense of reality. Just before agreeing to get checked in to hospital he confessed to getting a BJ from a stripper while I was away with the kids and he was supposed to be taking care of his mother who was dying from cancer. I told him I didn't care about that and I just want him to get help. Today I talked to the social worker and she said he told her he's been coping with stress by using porn and told her I probably already knew that. I always joked with him and asked if that's what he was doing when he would go to bed early but he always denied it. The social worker also told me the BJ story could have been made up in his head. Now here I am dealing with all this with my two little kids. My question is at what point do I talk to him about all this? I want him to recover but I want to be able to trust him. I keep having these feelings that maybe he doesn't even want to be with me and that's why he's been depressed. How do I make it not about me but not lose myself in this whole process? Thanks


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## Tilted 1 (Jul 23, 2019)

You have a long wait , even as the counselor has stated you should not trust what he is saying right now. The the counselor acess his state of mind and exactly what traits he carries.


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## Tilted 1 (Jul 23, 2019)

Then as and if healing occurs then, and you should also take in what state of mind he was, when this happened.


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## Dma8884 (Aug 30, 2019)

Tilted 1 said:


> You have a long wait , even as the counselor has stated you should not trust what he is saying right now. The the counselor acess his state of mind and exactly what traits he carries.





Tilted 1 said:


> Then as and if healing occurs then, and you should also take in what state of mind he was, when this happened.


Thank you! This is super sound advice.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Dma8884 said:


> Thank you! This is super sound advice.


 @Dma8884 please don't forget about you.

You need counselling and support, too.


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