# My husband has a man crush ? help!



## mrsbjj (Jun 25, 2013)

My husband and I have been together for 10 years, the last thing I ever expected was for him to be gay/bi/ bi-curious. The other day I was logged into his fb which he knows about. I happened to catch a conversation with a guy he used to work with. He had de-friended this guy because we agreed he is a loser, he has 3 kids by 3 different women and doesn't take care of any of them, why would he want to associate with such a dirtbag right? so he defriends him and his wife with the huge boobs. So I see even though they are no longer friends he can message him and so he says - Hey can I tell you something? and after I do you have to delete it and the guy agrees and then he says - I'm hard right now - Took the guy a minute to reply but he says well you must be excited about work, then my husband apologizes and says how embarrassed he was for saying that and he'd never done that before and so on..Now he cant stop asking the guy to go to lunch with him...they never make it but they were supposed to go last Friday and my husband got up and got ready for work like he was going on a date. Hes always trying to talk to him and give him relationship advice etc.. the guy seems like he's not interested in any of it but my husband keeps asking him questions. Then he deletes everything right away so I cant see if I log into his account. very suspicious behavior...what should I do? I want to ask him but I also feel like I need more information first.


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## sinnister (Dec 5, 2010)

Are you sure he is speaking with the guy? Or is it his wife?


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## Sanity (Mar 7, 2011)

mrsbjj said:


> My husband and I have been together for 10 years, the last thing I ever expected was for him to be gay/bi/ bi-curious. The other day I was logged into his fb which he knows about. I happened to catch a conversation with a guy he used to work with. He had de-friended this guy because we agreed he is a loser, he has 3 kids by 3 different women and doesn't take care of any of them, why would he want to associate with such a dirtbag right? so he defriends him and his wife with the huge boobs. So I see even though they are no longer friends he can message him and so he says - Hey can I tell you something? and after I do you have to delete it and the guy agrees and then he says - I'm hard right now - Took the guy a minute to reply but he says well you must be excited about work, then my husband apologizes and says how embarrassed he was for saying that and he'd never done that before and so on..Now he cant stop asking the guy to go to lunch with him...they never make it but they were supposed to go last Friday and my husband got up and got ready for work like he was going on a date. Hes always trying to talk to him and give him relationship advice etc.. the guy seems like he's not interested in any of it but my husband keeps asking him questions. Then he deletes everything right away so I cant see if I log into his account. very suspicious behavior...what should I do? I want to ask him but I also feel like I need more information first.



Could be your husband is Bi curious. If you suspect this suspend sex until you can verify it. I recommend you hire a PI or put a GPS smart device on his vehicle to track his movements. 

The reason I say to suspend sex is that statistically men who engage in homosexual encounters tend to have multiple partners exposing you to life threatening STD's. I have nothing againsts the GLBT lifestyle as long as they practice safe sex and are honest with their partners. 

As a woman you need to decide what to do if your husband has homosexual tendencies. I personally have no tolerance for a partner that is bi or sexually confused. Let them "figure it out" on another person's time. As Sweet Brown would say "I ain't got time for that!".


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## doubletrouble (Apr 23, 2013)

My EX wife never really came out of the closet. But I left her. If she's happier with same sex activities, that's fine by me, but I can't and won't compete with other women for my woman. I am just not biologically equipped for it. 

So yeah, that would be very frustrating and a bit alarming, if that's what's going on.


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## couple (Nov 6, 2010)

A 'man crush' is one man's non-sexual admiration of a 'cool guy'. your husband does not have a man crush.


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

hes hiding something!


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## marko (Jul 22, 2013)

I agree, a man crush is when you admire another man and think he is someone to look up to. 

I have a man-crush on mark Walberg, not sure exactly why no matter. one guy I used to work with has a man crush on me. that's cool. 

telling another man you are hard makes you either bi or bi-curious. which is fine as well. if that is okay with all parties involved. he might be very well in love with you and does not want to engage in actual sex with another man he is just a little curious about it. 

maybe he wants to try some new things with you. you could ask him what he wants. if he wants to be with other men and you do not want to partake in that then its a really easy answer. let him go do his thing and get on with life. 

he can still be only with you and experience some of the things bi-sexual men experience, it only depends on how willing and open you and him wish to be.


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## boonefhh (Jul 22, 2013)

I agree, a man crush is when you admire another man and think he is someone to look up to.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

I agree that he might actually be talking to the wife with the big boobs. Don't tell him what you found and keep checking it out. You might want to put a key logger on his computer to see what you are missing.


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## MrK (Sep 2, 2010)

OP is gone. One-post-wonder.


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