# Farting around SO



## DaveinOC (Oct 15, 2017)

I was talking to some of my married/dating friends and they thought it was the weirdest thing that in my 5 year marriage + 4 years dating prior to that that my wife and I do not fart around each other. 

Not only that, around each other we don't:

1) Burp
2) Leave bathroom smelling, we spray perfume/febreeze all over
3) Don't change clothes around each other
4) Don't kiss each other without brushing teeth
5) etc..

It is not really a comfort issue cuz she and i don't do this even around our family, so I figured we are just more shy/discreet about this stuff, but my friends insist that married couples SHOULD feel enough connection with each other that they should be able to do whatever. I personally disagree but feel that they may have a point nonetheless and start wondering if my wife would ever start doing things around me if I loosen up too. 

Are there any other "weirdos" like us?


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## GTdad (Aug 15, 2011)

We don't take it as far as you two do but no, I try not to fart around my wife (and I guess vice-versa).

I just tell people that I was potty-trained at gunpoint.


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

I was discreet about passing gas and still am to an extent but have never been body conscious around anyone so I definitely parade around Mrs. C.

She is a cute little gas bomb and has put me to shame in the art of cutting one! 😉 💣😁


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## Livvie (Jan 20, 2014)

I can't imagine needing to either hold it in or move location every time for 9 years.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

DaveinOC;18555202I was talking to some of my married/dating friends and they thought it was the weirdest thing that in my 5 year marriage + 4 years dating prior to that that my wife and I do not fart around each other.
Not only that said:


> *Yeah, that’s all kinda weird in my book!
> 
> Never been one much for belching or burping!
> 
> ...


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## CharlieParker (Aug 15, 2012)

I tell my wife her fear of potentially farting is not a valid reason to forego cunnilingus.

Brushing teeth, I get. Don't change clothes around each other, not so much.


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## DaveinOC (Oct 15, 2017)

arbitrator said:


> *Yeah, that’s all kinda weird in my book!
> 
> Never been one much for belching or burping!
> 
> ...


LOL best comment ever


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## DaveinOC (Oct 15, 2017)

CharlieParker said:


> I tell my wife her fear of potentially farting is not a valid reason to forego cunnilingus.
> 
> Brushing teeth, I get. Don't change clothes around each other, not so much.


xD. I wouldnt know if muff eating could trigger fart. I can see how this could be the case for intercourse though. another weird thing we do... is that we make sure to clear our bowel at least 6 hours before sex. lol..


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

I often heard my mother tell my father she needed a canary in a cage to use the bathroom after him.I never understood what she meant until years later.


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## tropicalbeachiwish (Jun 1, 2016)

DaveinOC said:


> xD. I wouldnt know if muff eating could trigger fart. I can see how this could be the case for intercourse though. another weird thing we do... is that we make sure to clear our bowel at least 6 hours before sex. lol..


It's a little much. So what happens if you've pooped 2 hours before and she's initiating? Do you say "oh honey. I can't. I just pooped 2 hours ago, but in 4 hours, I'll be good to go!". Yes, that's weird. 

BTW, my H & I don't really fart around each other but every once in a while, one will slip. Or it ends up being louder than what was anticipated. I just blame it on the dog, even if he's no where around. >


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

DaveinOC said:


> xD. I wouldnt know if muff eating could trigger fart. I can see how this could be the case for intercourse though. another weird thing we do... is that we make sure to clear our bowel at least 6 hours before sex. lol..


So a quickie is out of the question in your house?🙁


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

Some of the most mind blowing sex sessions we have had were me coming directly from work or working hard, dirty and sweaty and just taking her.

We generally get really clean for sex but once in a while hot passions drive us.


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## DaveinOC (Oct 15, 2017)

Andy1001 said:


> So a quickie is out of the question in your house?🙁


Nope quickie NEVER happens here (even though I would like to sometimes..). Sex at my household doesn't happen unless the room is set up like ICU and her mind in complete zen. me, i couldn't care less if she just ran 5 miles and has puddle of booty sweat. 

It's not that we arbitrarily go oooo you pooped recently, it ain't happening right now, it's more like we naturally (unintentionally) don't really start anything unless we have good 5~6 hours since we went.


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

DaveinOC said:


> Nope quickie NEVER happens here (even though I would like to sometimes..). Sex at my household doesn't happen unless the room is set up like ICU and her mind in complete zen. me, i couldn't care less if she just ran 5 miles and has puddle of booty sweat.
> 
> It's not that we arbitrarily go oooo you pooped recently, it ain't happening right now, it's more like we naturally (unintentionally) don't really start anything unless we have good 5~6 hours since we went.


I finish work at five am at the latest (I work from home) and my girlfriend is always up by then and we have a swim and then we have a hard workout in my home gym.
Then we have a hard,sweaty workout in bed.
Just the thing to start the day.
Better than cornflakes anyway.


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## Cooper (Apr 18, 2008)

DaveinOC said:


> I was talking to some of my married/dating friends and they thought it was the weirdest thing that in my 5 year marriage + 4 years dating prior to that that my wife and I do not fart around each other.
> 
> Not only that, around each other we don't:
> 
> ...


Here we are a bunch of grown ass adults talking about farts and pooping! This post cracks me up because a week ago at a cookout we were having the same discussion. My one friend has been married for 25 plus years and has never purposely farted in front of his wife or his older daughter, but he and his youngest daughter (23) fart around each other just for the fun of it. It was a hilarious discussion with input from both genders.


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

DaveinOC said:


> Are there any other "weirdos" like us?


One of my friends experienced this in his 2nd marriage. It took him a while to discover this, but for the 1st year of his second marriage his wife simply did NOT use the bathroom in their house. She would stop by her parents house (close by) and take care of things there instead as she did not feel comfortable doing #2 anywhere near her new husband. 

We were playing golf together and this friend looked at me with a grin and asked if I was as shocked as he was, that for a "whole year" she was afraid to go #2 in the house with him. Meanwhile her pet dog did #2 all over the house inside, so it was hard for him to believe it when he discovered this.


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## MrsHolland (Jun 18, 2016)

We get dressed and undressed infront or/ together every morning and night.
Kiss without cleaning teeth (except if he just ate meat).

Farting etc around each other is a big NO. I can't stand crassness, keep it classy is how we operate here.


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## DaveinOC (Oct 15, 2017)

badsanta said:


> One of my friends experienced this in his 2nd marriage. It took him a while to discover this, but for the 1st year of his second marriage his wife simply did NOT use the bathroom in their house. She would stop by her parents house (close by) and take care of things there instead as she did not feel comfortable doing #2 anywhere near her new husband.
> 
> We were playing golf together and this friend looked at me with a grin and asked if I was as shocked as he was, that for a "whole year" she was afraid to go #2 in the house with him. Meanwhile her pet dog did #2 all over the house inside, so it was hard for him to believe it when he discovered this.


This actually sounds alot like me. I know as a dude I should grow a pair, but I had the hardest time going #2 around my wife when we first married. It wasn't a big deal when we were dating because I would just hold it or, if we were out, I'd either make my bathroom trip super quick or make excuses that the line was long just so she doesn't suspect I was releasing the beast. This isnt just with my gfs though. I couldn't use school bathroom from kindergarten to high school because I was so nervous.


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## MJJEAN (Jun 26, 2015)

DaveinOC said:


> 1) Burp
> 2) Leave bathroom smelling, we spray perfume/febreeze all over
> 3) Don't change clothes around each other
> 4) Don't kiss each other without brushing teeth
> 5) etc..



1) We can nearly hold a conversation in belches. I joke that his farts sound like angry ducks and he tells me it's my fault he's farting because I relax him.

2) DH or I will happily walk into the bathroom while the other is going potty, showering, or grooming and have a conversation.

3) We've never thought anything of dressing for the day (or evening), changing clothes, or just simply stripping down to nothing to wander around nude in front of each other.

4) Kisses and sex happen mostly spontaneously and neither one of us particularly cares about minty fresh breath when we're feeling "inspired". >

These things are intimate personal things to me and I wouldn't behave the same with, say, some casual FWB or ONS.


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## Yeswecan (Jul 25, 2014)

My W and I belch and fart. It happens. What does not happen is leaving the room every time it happens.


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## Satya (Jun 22, 2012)

Odo and I are super comfortable around each other. Anything goes. And we are terribly potty humored as well, and have 3 dogs that fart more than we do. 

We don't mind bodily functions around each other. If needed, we'll ask for privacy in the bathroom, but we're totally comfortable asking if we can come in to brush our teeth. And yeah, the smell doesn't really phase us. We only act this way at home.


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## bajaherbie (May 20, 2017)

So I am the only one that on occasion gives his wife the "dutch oven treatment" while watching TV when we are in bed ?

Sent from my SM-G920R4 using Tapatalk


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## 3putt (Dec 3, 2012)

I have to wonder what would happen if either of them ever became non-ambulatory and had to depend on the other for bedpan duty. Who they gonna call, Turd Dumpers?


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## DaveinOC (Oct 15, 2017)

3putt said:


> I have to wonder what would happen if either of them ever became non-ambulatory and had to depend on the other for bedpan duty. Who they gonna call, Turd Dumpers?


Ironically, my wife is an RN that help people pass gas and change soiled sheet on a daily basis.


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## chillymorn69 (Jun 27, 2016)

I never could master the art of holding in a fart!


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## frusdil (Sep 5, 2013)

My husband farts shamelessly around me and I hate it. It's gross.

The one and only time I did in front of him was an accident and I was MORTIFIED. He was nearly crying with laughter, lol. But I fled the room in horror 

The other stuff doesn't phase us, though I walk around the house naked, hubby will only go naked from the bedroom to the bathroom - he was raised in a really uptight family. Mine were much more relaxed.

I remember one day, I was well into my 30's then, I called in at my parents for a visit. Mum wasn't home but dad was. I was calling out asking where he was and he's all "I'm in here love!" so up the hallway I go thinking that he's just cleaning his teeth or having a shave or something. Oh no...I walk into the bathroom and there's Dad, sitting on the toot, reading the paper "G'day love! How are ya? Want to put the kettle on?" bahahahahahahahaha.


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## chillymorn69 (Jun 27, 2016)

frusdil said:


> My husband farts shamelessly around me and I hate it. It's gross.
> 
> The one and only time I did in front of him was an accident and I was MORTIFIED. He was nearly crying with laughter, lol. But I fled the room in horror
> 
> ...


The one raised in an up tight family farts at will and the one that wasn't is mortified......go figure!:grin2:


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## chillymorn69 (Jun 27, 2016)

Beans beans there good for the heart the more you eat the more you.....

Never mind.

My mother never farted in front of us .she even said she would pay 5 bucks if anybody could /would catch her. One day i was up extremly early and she was sitting buy the register on a cold morning drinking her coffe and smoking a cig . When she let on rip and I heard it through the register/duct work and i screamed up through that she owed me 5 $ we laughed about that for years!

She never did cough up that 5 spot!

Boy I miss my mother best mom in the world!


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## Max.HeadRoom (Jun 28, 2014)

I would not mind a little more concealment in my home. My dear wife will sometimes wait for me ½ up the stair when going to bed. As I start heading up she farts and tells me that she is warming the air for me.


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## frusdil (Sep 5, 2013)

chillymorn69 said:


> frusdil said:
> 
> 
> > My husband farts shamelessly around me and I hate it. It's gross.
> ...


I know right? Bizarre!!


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## 269370 (Dec 17, 2016)

DaveinOC said:


> I was talking to some of my married/dating friends and they thought it was the weirdest thing that in my 5 year marriage + 4 years dating prior to that that my wife and I do not fart around each other.
> 
> Not only that, around each other we don't:
> 
> ...


Farting is a big no-no outside the bathroom for me. My wife sometimes makes fun of me for being so uptight about it ('making diamonds again?' by holding it back). 
Also don't do 1 and 2 (have Toto toilets that refresh the whole room afterwards, among other things). Definitely do 3 and sometimes 4.
Generally, I do have a thing about not farting and don't like when other people do it deliberately. It's inconsiderate and rude.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

You almost not want to answer this thread as some may think less of you.. I have to say .. we are a couple who does it all around each other.. no shame.... 
We both appreciate some bathroom humor... 

I guess we're just compatible like that.... He farts a lot more than I...a no no for me would be in any sort of foreplay or sex... I mean if I feel that coming on.. I gotta leave the room ... and come back.. cause that would surely ruin the mood !! That's never happened even... 

In fact... I have noticed if I was even a little gassy... getting horny takes it completely away .... My husband can kiss without our teeth being brushed.. Me.. I never liked this.. but interestingly.. when my sex drive sky rocketed.. I didn't care at all - just KISS ME morning breathe -bring it on!! .... I guess that's how HE felt back in the day when I was a little turned off by that....wanting him to be freshly brushed...I'd often tell him "go brush!"...

I used to be like Eve wanting a Leaf to cover me when we were younger -about being naked in front of him... Terribly silly looking back.. I got over that.. we dress, undress, anything goes now... it hasn't affected us in a negative way... so it works for us.. I guess this is just another area of compatibility for some people...Can't say either of us burp much.. if ever though...

I am happy he's as open as he is.. and I am sure he feels the same about me.. what is odd with us is:

We are both more on the introverted side and wouldn't be like this around others at all.. it's just that we are so dang comfortable with each other.. we just don't give it a another thought....


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## Satya (Jun 22, 2012)

chillymorn69 said:


> Beans beans there good for the heart the more you eat the more you.....
> 
> Never mind.
> 
> ...


This is hilarious!


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## Amplexor (Feb 13, 2008)

My wife doesn't care if I fart around her, but does draw the line when I try and light them.


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## She'sStillGotIt (Jul 30, 2016)

Max.HeadRoom said:


> I would not mind a little more concealment in my home. My dear wife will sometimes wait for me ½ up the stair when going to bed. As I start heading up she farts and tells me that she is warming the air for me.


I have to say, she's disgusting.


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## Ynot (Aug 26, 2014)

Amplexor said:


> My wife doesn't care if I fart around her, but does draw the line when I try and light them.


Dumb and Dumber


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## Ynot (Aug 26, 2014)

I don't know about anyone else but the entire list posted by the OP is simply part of being human. So I don't understand why one would try to hide their humanness from the one person in the whole world they should be most comfortable with. If someone is so uptight they can't fart or belch or get dressed in front of someone...to me that is a recipe for disaster. Do you actually believe that your SO does not know that you are human? Would you want them to think you are not? If you have to try to abide by those standards, I can't imagine some of the other issues you have to deal with.


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## Herschel (Mar 27, 2016)

Omg you people. I’ve been dating a woman for 3 months and not only do we fart and shower together and hang out naked but we laugh about it and enjoy being people. I am willing to bet anyone with a stick up their keester like that is hard to laugh and enjoy life with. Probably no dirty talk or double entendre goofiness. That’s a tough life to lead with someone you should be completely open and vulnerable with.

How could anyone be mad at you for being human? All of you who act like that is disgusting or terrible should get therapy. I mean, it’s gross, no doubt about that, but it’s being comfortable with the one you love. That is more important than anything.


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## 482 (Mar 14, 2017)

This is a riot. I have discussed this with my wife so many times it is super funny to me that she will not fart, also weird about morning breath and using the bathroom but not changing. I keep telling her she is going to explode, lol. For a while I followed her lead then I just said this is nuts already and started being myself. She hears farts, she may walk in on me in the bathroom, I have never cared about the breath thing, and if she changes in front of me she can expect me to talk about her body and grab her so she does that often. I joke with her and call her the "**** ninja" or "fart ninja"


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## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

Honestly, my SO and I prefer to maintain a little mystery. We're both pretty private people anyway. Neither of us would be okay with our SO walking in to brush their teeth while we were using the bathroom. We try to leave the bathroom in habitable condition for the next person. We don't fart around one another, and try not to belch obnoxiously. We both usually wash up first if we expect a chance to be intimate. We will change in front of one another and don't insist on clean teeth, or even freshly washed bodies, as a necessary prerequisite to intimacy. We have a happy and active sex life. 

We both recognize that the other is a human, with normal human bodily functions. But we also try not to overshare. We try to treat one another with the same courtesy and consideration we did when we began dating. Would you have a second date with someone who belched, farted, or loudly proclaimed that "you should NOT go in there, whooo!" when coming out of the bathroom on a wafting cloud of rank stench? Would you do that, yourself, on a first or second date? For some people, the answer would be yes, because they aren't bothered at all by those things. For others, like my SO and I, the answer would be no. And if we wouldn't do that on a first date, or have a second date with someone who behaved that way, then we see no real calling to have a two hundredth date with someone who does. Frankly, we both find it sexier and much more attractive to not know too much about our partner's bathroom habits or digestion issues. It works for us.


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## TheDudeLebowski (Oct 10, 2017)

We are so oppisite its probably strange to most. Our family motto on gas is "be proud fart loud" and we live by it. Our kids will come stick their little rears in our face's while you're sitting on the couch and fart. Then laugh histarically and run away. They are 7&8 yrs old. Of course we do it back to them and each other.

Pull my finger game. Juvenile fart and pee and poo jokes are daily banter in our home. People walking around in their underwear, a daily activity. Well my wife doesn't, but the rest of us do. Nobody ever shuts a door, even to use the restroom to pee. Just to duce, well my kids won't... and my wife will shut and lock our door for other things  other than that, doors are always wide open. So of course everyone changes cloths all over the place as well. 

We also like to play a game in the car on road trips. Basically someone farts, and the first person who can't take it anymore and opens their window looses. I like to use the window lock myself and crop dust my family in the car. You guys are missing out man. 

I remember one time my wife and I were on vacation. We were staying in a rental duplex probably 1200sqft two bedroom. We went out for dinner and shared a tuna tartar for an appetizer. Man, when I tell you that thing destroyed our stomachs, smh. Went "home" right after dinner and proceeded to fog the entire place out within minutes just laughing our heads off at how bad the entire house smelled cause we just couldn't stop farting. I made a comment how awful it would be to have to fly on a plane in that condition, and she googles something on the subject. Sure enough the first article talks about foods not to eat before a flight, and tuna tartar was right at the top of that list! Hahaha. We couldn't stop laughing.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

DaveinOC said:


> I was talking to some of my married/dating friends and they thought it was the weirdest thing that in my 5 year marriage + 4 years dating prior to that that my wife and I do not fart around each other.
> 
> Not only that, around each other we don't:
> 
> ...


How about when you let one out when you think no one is around and then suddenly she walks in?


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## Satya (Jun 22, 2012)

TheDudeLebowski said:


> We are so oppisite its probably strange to most. Our family motto on gas is "be proud fart loud" and we live by it. Our kids will come stick their little rears in our face's while you're sitting on the couch and fart. Then laugh histarically and run away. They are 7&8 yrs old. Of course we do it back to them and each other.
> 
> Pull my finger game. Juvenile fart and pee and poo jokes are daily banter in our home. People walking around in their underwear, a daily activity. Well my wife doesn't, but the rest of us do. Nobody ever shuts a door, even to use the restroom to pee. Just to duce, well my kids won't... and my wife will shut and lock our door for other things  other than that, doors are always wide open. So of course everyone changes cloths all over the place as well.
> 
> ...


This post shows what a range of preferences we all have. If Odo and I had kids, we'd be just like this. But at the present we can at least blame our dogs and laugh about it...

Odo says on our first "date" he held in a fart for 3+ hours because he was worried I'd be put off if he let silently rip... Later on he learned I didn't care, so now he just lets rip full stop.


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## notmyrealname4 (Apr 9, 2014)

/


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## Herschel (Mar 27, 2016)

I draw a line at my kids. Keep your stank asses away from me.


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## toblerone (Oct 18, 2016)

My thing is: how can you be so uncomfortable with yourself that you can't even let that part of your guard down for a marriage?


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## Ursula (Dec 2, 2016)

Livvie said:


> I can't imagine needing to either hold it in or move location every time for 9 years.


Ditto. Boy, if that were the case, I'd have had WAY more steps on my FitBit tracker because I'd have been on the move a lot more! :grin2:


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## lucy999 (Sep 28, 2014)

MJJEAN said:


> 1) I joke that his farts sound like angry ducks


Hahahahaa!!! That is hysterical.

Disclaimer: I have an immature and raunchy sense of humor. I think toilet humor is pretty funny. I will laugh at a fart joke or an actual fart every single time.

However, my boyfriend and I generally don't fart in front of each other. It's not like we hide it or hold it, but if it's convenient, we'll go into the bathroom or elsewhere.

Burping is a little more relaxed, but I try not to do it in front of him. I just feel that for me, it's not a good look, and I want to stay feminine and appealing to my boyfriend. He could not care less if I did it in front of him, but I do think a little mystery is nice. 

Kissing is indeed an issue for me. He is a heavy smoker and it's pretty damn gross. So he knows the drill. If we want to bump uglies or have some intimacy, he knows he needs to brush his teeth. Kissing and smelling like an ashtray is not sexy.

Undressing in front of each other, that's a non-issue. In fact, I enjoy those times because my boyfriend has zero ass. I mean, he is flat as a board. He has a habit of twerking when he undresses. It's hysterical. Because he doesn't have anything to twerk! 

Good Times.


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## Bianca Stella (Sep 26, 2017)

DaveinOC said:


> I was talking to some of my married/dating friends and they thought it was the weirdest thing that in my 5 year marriage + 4 years dating prior to that that my wife and I do not fart around each other.
> 
> Not only that, around each other we don't:
> 
> ...


 husband and I are exactly the same. Never, not once, in 13 years.


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## DaveinOC (Oct 15, 2017)

Appreciate everyone's response and find it interesting that everyone has different perspectives on this. Some stories you guys shared are pretty damn funny.


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## JayDee7 (Sep 12, 2017)

What ever works for and keeps you happy is what matters. Obviously everyone does what works for them.
My wife and I do not fart around each other, she keeps the magic alive very well. We both have a level of decorum around each other about bodily functions. 
We do change clothes in front of each other and kiss all the time, even if we aren't freshly brushed. We shower together daily and are very close, really nothing but transparency except the bathroom type activities.


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## Ynot (Aug 26, 2014)

I have nothing against being civil with each other, but for goodness sakes - you are or should be completely open and honest with your SO. If you can't fart, burp, crap, pee or do any of the other things that mean you are a living breathing living thing, than why bother. I don't go looking for my SO when I have to fart, but if I have to fart and she is around - so be it. My ex used to hold it in and she was constantly constipated. When I have to teach and I am in front of a lass room, I get constipated from holding it in. It isn't healthy, nor is it normal to hold it in. But it is natural to let it out, after all that is the purpose of the bowel.


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## Primrose (Mar 4, 2015)

My SO & I do all of the above together. 

Strangely enough, it bothered me when my ex-H would fart in front of me or leave the restroom door open while going. But, for as much as I loved him, we lacked a lot in the chemistry department, so I think that explains a lot.


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## Satya (Jun 22, 2012)

notmyrealname4 said:


> Why do we try to be civil to strangers; but let loose all the worst about ourselves with our mates. Try to preserve at least a little romance.


I suppose my honest answer would be that it gets tiring wearing the mask 24-7. And we don't need to be civil, but we choose to. I definitely have no desire to wear a mask in front of my spouse. People fart! Have you been in an elevator, bus, plane, or car ever and can say hand on heart you've never smelled an obvious fart? Then you act like you didn't smell it, right? I'm not having a go at you @NotMyRealName, I just realized from this thread how perverse (?) people must think I am! 

At home, I want to be my gassy self, as does Odo. If not in my own home, then where? Nowhere except maybe outdoors away from others. 

My ex H hated gas, burps, & potty humor. It was impossible to just be myself, so I held it in (literally and figuratively) and I kid you not, my self confidence tanked over time. His parents would joke about it with me occasionally and he'd get SO offended we'd joke about bodily functions. I never understood why he was so uptight about it but I was respectful of his wishes. He got a less comfortable, less confident, and less happy wife. We clearly weren't compatible in a lot of ways but this was a rather huge one, strangely enough. 

It's effortless being with Odo by comparison. We are both on the same page. And we don't lose any romance for it. Quite the opposite, in fact.

As long as your spouse shares the same viewpoint, the level of bodily discretion can be set to appropriate levels.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

Satya said:


> I suppose my honest answer would be that it gets tiring wearing the mask 24-7. And we don't need to be civil, but we choose to. I definitely have no desire to wear a mask in front of my spouse. People fart! Have you been in an elevator, bus, plane, or car ever and can say hand on heart you've never smelled an obvious fart? Then you act like you didn't smell it, right? I'm not having a go at you @NotMyRealName, I just realized from this thread how perverse (?) people must think I am!
> 
> At home, I want to be my gassy self, as does Odo. If not in my own home, then where? Nowhere except maybe outdoors away from others.
> 
> ...


*Dr. Axe is omitting one extremely important statistic here:

STINK - 100% 

But it greatly gives me levity to tease the hell out of them!*


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

A friend of mine has this trick she likes to pull.She can make the sound of a squeaky fart without moving her lips.She loves to do it in restaurants or coffee shops just as someone is about to sit down.
She has done it to me so many times I have lost count,she makes the noise then rolls her eyes and says something like “ better out than in” white giving me a dirty look.
There is no point protesting your innocence,she is too good an actress.


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## TheDudeLebowski (Oct 10, 2017)

Andy1001 said:


> A friend of mine has this trick she likes to pull.She can make the sound of a squeaky fart without moving her lips.She loves to do it in restaurants or coffee shops just as someone is about to sit down.
> She has done it to me so many times I have lost count,she makes the noise then rolls her eyes and says something like ? better out than in? white giving me a dirty look.
> There is no point protesting your innocence,she is too good an actress.


Sounds like a dangerous woman to get involved with.


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## thefam (Sep 9, 2014)

I think it's whatever works for you as a couple. Hubby and I have some "farting guidelines" that although created in fun really work well: 
1. Absolutely no farting in my kitchen while I'm in there cooking
2. If you need to fart, Step into another room, fart and count to 10 if at all possible. If it comes on you suddenly just step as far away as possible
3. In bed in the middle of the night turn the opposite direction from the other, lift up the covers, fart and spray the air freshener thats on each of our night stands (We use the Yankee Candle ones which are GREAT odor eliminators).

For morning breath we spray a bit of clove breath freshener before having a full blown conversation or kissing. We both prefer that to morning breath

Unless it's number 2 we walk in on the bathroom at any time

We have no nakedness shame whatsoever. Even when I was over 200 lbs from 2 back to back pregnancies last year although I looked a hot mess I didn't care about him seeing me

That's all folks!


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## Cooper (Apr 18, 2008)

I remember my son getting off the school elementary bus one day and running up the drive, I said "what's the hurry?" he said "I thought I had to fart but poop came out!". So just be careful where you let it rip folks.


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## DustyDog (Jul 12, 2016)

This seems to be one of those couples things that varies a lot and rarely is discussed.

From OP's initial posting, I'd say both of them simply have a highly refined view of what they're comfortable doing around others, and have yet to let their guard down with each other.

I try to not assail anybody's nostrils, if I can avoid it, but nature is nature. And no, having gas does not mean you have eaten the wrong thing. A LOT of gas may mean it, but occasional farts are just that way. I've been vegetarian, carnivourous, vegan, and the character of the gas changes, but it's always there, a bit...sometimes none one day, sometimes more the next.

I had one ex LTR who was offended, period. If all I did was pass gas while asleep, I'd hear about it - the next time we were with friends. If she passed gas, I'd catch holy hell if I mentioned it. My ex-wife, I swear, wanted it to be a competition. She was raised in an overly strict environment, and she was VERY careful not to fart during certain times, such as during a rare intimate session with me, or when out with friends. However, once in bed and attempting to sleep, she'd let them rip.

Perhaps 20 years ago, I dated, for a summer, a woman in the medical business and she observed that farts just are, and then joked that "you can tell you're comfortable in a relationship when you no longer try to hide your farts from each other."

My current LTR cracks me up on this one - if she needs to fart, she just does. I mean, like, when I'm going down on her, so my face is right there, she'll let one rip, then moments later have a screaming O, and in the afterglow, thank me for letting her be herself. And yet, in general, her demeanor is that of someone with great poise and connection with society.


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## MrsHolland (Jun 18, 2016)

Ynot said:


> *I have nothing against being civil with each other, but for goodness sakes - you are or should be completely open and honest with your SO. If you can't fart, burp, crap, pee or do any of the other things that mean you are a living breathing living thing, than why bother. *I don't go looking for my SO when I have to fart, but if I have to fart and she is around - so be it. My ex used to hold it in and she was constantly constipated. When I have to teach and I am in front of a lass room, I get constipated from holding it in. It isn't healthy, nor is it normal to hold it in. But it is natural to let it out, after all that is the purpose of the bowel.


lol it has zero to do with being open and honest. We are very open and honest here and discuss every aspect of life, sex, the world, our pasts etc.

I just see it as being crass, rude and disrespectful. Also would be a major turn off for me if my husband were to fart and burb around me like a bogan. (yobbo)

Why do you have to hold it in in front of the class? Do you have more respect for your students than your wife?


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

I seen this graffiti on a restroom wall once.

Here I sit broken hearted.
Spent ten cents and only farted.


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## EllisRedding (Apr 10, 2015)

Although my W and I don't go out of our ways to fart around each other (I would say more often we go with a slow release, hoping it is quiet!), every once in a while dropping a stink bomb in the car and locking the windows is priceless 

Same goes with a dutch over!


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

EllisRedding said:


> Although my W and I don't go out of our ways to fart around each other (I would say more often we go with a slow release, hoping it is quiet!)


Ergh... it's the silent ones that are the stinkiest >.<


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## EllisRedding (Apr 10, 2015)

RandomDude said:


> Ergh... it's the silent ones that are the stinkiest >.<


Blame those on the dogs or kids


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## happy2gether (Dec 6, 2015)

well considering I taught both daughters to fart on their mom on demand, as well as to burp the alphabet, I would say 1 & 2 don't apply in our house. We do change clothes around each other, but neither of us like to kiss before brushing our teeth first thing in the morning. Oddly enough, it doesn't stop kisses any other time of day.


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## Ynot (Aug 26, 2014)

MrsHolland said:


> lol it has zero to do with being open and honest. We are very open and honest here and discuss every aspect of life, sex, the world, our pasts etc.
> 
> I just see it as being crass, rude and disrespectful. Also would be a major turn off for me if my husband were to fart and burb around me like a bogan. (yobbo)
> 
> Why do you have to hold it in in front of the class? Do you have more respect for your students than your wife?


No I hold it because there are stuck up prudes who might complain. I don't need the problems when I teach. OTOH I wouldn't be with an uptight prude so I wouldn't need to hold it in in front of my wife. 
Oh yeah, I see you discuss everything except for farts, burps and diarrhea


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## MrsHolland (Jun 18, 2016)

Ynot said:


> No I hold it because there are stuck up prudes who might complain. I don't need the problems when I teach. OTOH I wouldn't be with an uptight prude so I wouldn't need to hold it in in front of my wife.
> Oh yeah, I see you discuss everything except for farts, burps and diarrhea


TFF yeah I'm a stuck up prude because I value good manners and respect. Well you are right I am stuck up if the meaning of "stuck up" means I hold values such as style in high esteem, so be it. 
Prude on the other hand, um no way.

So to you someone that has manners is a prude? To me a prude is someone that is sexually repressed, that Sir I am far from. But keep going, while I don't find toilet humor the realm of the adult, I do find your comments amusing >


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## VibrantWings (Sep 8, 2017)

Andy1001 said:


> I seen this graffiti on a restroom wall once.
> 
> Here I sit broken hearted.
> Spent ten cents and only farted.


There was a version of this on the bathroom wall of a laundry I went to as a kid:

Here I sit, broken hearted.
Tried to **** but only farted. 

Looks like your graffiti artist wanted to be polite while writing on bathroom walls...


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## Tatsuhiko (Jun 21, 2016)

DaveinOC said:


> xD. I wouldnt know if muff eating could trigger fart. I can see how this could be the case for intercourse though. another weird thing we do... is that we make sure to clear our bowel at least 6 hours before sex. lol..


https://youtu.be/6wa2v8707Kw?t=181


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## FeministInPink (Sep 13, 2012)

Real Estate and I are very comfortable around one another in this respect. We don't live together, but I would estimate that I spend at least 50% or more of my time at his place--sometimes I'll spend a week or more at his place (save going to work, etc.), so it feels like we live together.

We shower together nearly every day, and have no problem dressing/undressing together, and will walk around the apartment naked. We brush our teeth together, but are totally ok with kissing before teeth brushing, and the bathroom is generally free reign, if it's just the two of us, except when there is pooping going on. But even when that is happening, we'll sometimes have conversations through the closed door (we actually keep it cracked open because the dog will be scratching on the door). All of this introduces a certain level of intimacy that we wouldn't have otherwise.

About 6 months into our relationship, we were going to a club, and by the time we got there, we both had bad stomach cramps (must have been something we had eaten earlier), and simultaneously we both said, "I have to go to the bathroom!" We ran to the [unisex] bathroom together, and had bad pooping episodes in adjoining bathroom stalls. It was a pretty big bonding moment! While we were in our stalls, I said, "Baby, I still think you're so sexy."

So now, whenever one if us farts, the other one makes a comment like, "Boo, you're so sexy."

We still maintain a certain level of decorum. After a burp or a fart, we always say "Excuse me." Dutch ovens or anything like that are off-limits, and we make an effort to point that stuff away from one another. And if I think it's going to be bad, I try to pass it in another room. There is no way to avoid it, it's biology, but it's possible to be considerate towards your partner. 

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk


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## Ynot (Aug 26, 2014)

MrsHolland said:


> TFF yeah I'm a stuck up prude because I value good manners and respect. Well you are right I am stuck up if the meaning of "stuck up" means I hold values such as style in high esteem, so be it.
> Prude on the other hand, um no way.
> 
> So to you someone that has manners is a prude? To me a prude is someone that is sexually repressed, that Sir I am far from. But keep going, while I don't find toilet humor the realm of the adult, I do find your comments amusing >


No you're a stuck up prude because you value style over substance. No thanks. I'll take a real human woman over a high maintenance fashionista all day. It isn't a matter of manners, as I said I don't go looking for my SO, but you probably missed that while looking down your nose at a rube like me. What it is a matter of is being a human, and if you like to imagine your SO is something other than that, I doubt you are the sexual beast you try to portray yourself as


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## TX-SC (Aug 25, 2015)

.


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## MrsHolland (Jun 18, 2016)

Ynot said:


> No you're a stuck up prude because you value style over substance. No thanks. I'll take a real human woman over a high maintenance fashionista all day. It isn't a matter of manners, as I said I don't go looking for my SO, but you probably missed that while looking down your nose at a rube like me. What it is a matter of is being a human, and if you like to imagine your SO is something other than that, I doubt you are the sexual beast you try to portray yourself as



Booooo

Your were funny, now you just come across as nasty. If you weren't raised with good manners that is your problem.

What is funny though is that you think their is a connection between sexual compatibility and farting or not in front of your partner. That is one of the most insane things I have ever read here. 

My husband is respectful and he is a Superman in the bedroom, all good here thanks.


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## EllaSuaveterre (Oct 2, 2016)

I change clothes in front of my husband, but I don't do anything else on that list. We've been married 6 years.


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## john117 (May 20, 2013)

The McMansion has 5 bedrooms and 6 baths. Plenty of personal space. But I'm with Mrs Holland on this one. Feelings are one thing, but low level bodily functionality is quite another.


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## MrsHolland (Jun 18, 2016)

john117 said:


> The McMansion has 5 bedrooms and 6 baths. Plenty of personal space. But I'm with Mrs Holland on this one. Feelings are one thing, but low level bodily functionality is quite another.


6 bedrooms and only 4 bathrooms here :grin2: but yeah a double toilet room might be marital bliss for some but seriously gross to me. Is that a real pic or photoshoped?


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## john117 (May 20, 2013)

But do you have a cat suite? 

The pic is real, taken during the Olympics in Sochi, Russia. The Olympic village architecture leaves a bit to be desired.


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## MrsHolland (Jun 18, 2016)

john117 said:


> But do you have a cat suite?
> 
> The pic is real, taken during the Olympics in Sochi, Russia. The Olympic village architecture leaves a bit to be desired.


TFF a cat suite, I'm guessing your little darlings do? No but our Princess has her own private little litter box with a door and lid.


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

Taking a deuce is still pretty private for us. I like to be left alone for that and so does she.

Peeing is no big deal and we do it while the other is in the bano.


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## chillymorn69 (Jun 27, 2016)

ConanHub said:


> Taking a deuce is still pretty private for us. I like to be left alone for that and so does she.
> 
> Peeing is no big deal and we do it while the other is in the bano.


Where you taken it ?
I leave or dump a duce.

>


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## chillymorn69 (Jun 27, 2016)

You know the honeymoon is over when your in the shower and your wife comes in and leave a loud stinky $hit .


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## frusdil (Sep 5, 2013)

chillymorn69 said:


> You know the honeymoon is over when your in the shower and your wife comes in and leave a loud stinky $hit .


 

That's just gross...


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## john117 (May 20, 2013)

MrsHolland said:


> TFF a cat suite, I'm guessing your little darlings do? No but our Princess has her own private little litter box with a door and lid.


The ground floor cat suite has a bedroom / storage room / full bath. When the cat is home he sleeps there with one of us because you REALLY don't want an athletic 20+ lb cat roaming around the house at night. Plus the room has a window to the outside where all the wildlife gathers (feeders attract all kinds of animals), the bathroom has his litter box, and the storage room shelving doubles as a cat tower . During the day he has access to the entire ground floor, about 2000 sq ft, but at night he has the cat suite.

Bottom line - even cats like their privacy when they go potty... Shouldn't people do it too?


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## Tatsuhiko (Jun 21, 2016)

That's how Romans did it. Friends, family, and lovers, all in the same bathroom:

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/4/44/Ostia-Toilets.JPG

It seems shocking and gross today, but when in Rome...


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## DaveinOC (Oct 15, 2017)

and here i was deluded in my naivety to believe girls don't poop...


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## MrsHolland (Jun 18, 2016)

I rarely think of online forums after logging off but last night I was in fits of laughter while we were in the shower and was telling MrH about this thread.

Was thinking of that awful pic of the two person powder room, we have a double shower in our ensuite and now when we are in it I see that damn pic in my head of the double toilet.


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

John in a town in the west of Ireland called Sligo there is a bar called shoot the crows.The ladies restroom has twin toilet bowls just like your picture.I had a picture but I can’t find it.I will email one of my cousins and try to get a pic.


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

Andy1001 said:


> John in a town in the west of Ireland called Sligo there is a bar called shoot the crows.The ladies restroom has twin toilet bowls just like your picture.I had a picture but I can’t find it.I will email one of my cousins and try to get a pic.


Edit.This is one I got off the net,the woman is a reporter.


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