# Sticky  Questionable PMs and/or fishing PMS: Please report them



## EleGirl

I just want to remind members that if you are receiving unwanted private messages (PM), that you can forward the private message to a moderator who will handle the situation.

There seems to be an issue of some members sending PMs trying to get involved in online chatting, cybering, etc.

We moderators cannot go into anyone's PM account and read PMs, so we rely on you, our members, reporting any issues.

Ele


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## Faithful Wife

This is gross. I remember a rando PM or two long time ago but nothing since then. 

If I get any I will definitely forward them. I don’t get why people would do this here. There are so many places where people can chat or flirt or whatever they want to do. We aren’t here for that and it’s gross.

Thanks for your attention and time, mods.


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## She'sStillGotIt

LOL...I'm so mean no one dares to PM me with that nonsense. :grin2:


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## ReformedHubby

Apparently my PM inbox was full, I never deleted any messages so I couldn't receive new ones. I've deleted them now so I guess the pervs will be able to reach me. I will definitely let you know if I get something.


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## Blondilocks

ReformedHubby said:


> Apparently my PM inbox was full, I never deleted any messages so I couldn't receive new ones. I've deleted them now so I guess the pervs will be able to reach me. I will definitely let you know if I get something.


LOL. You and Faithful Wife are so cute.


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## ConanHub

ReformedHubby said:


> Apparently my PM inbox was full, I never deleted any messages so I couldn't receive new ones. I've deleted them now so I guess the pervs will be able to reach me. I will definitely let you know if I get something.


Ah man! You mean you missed out on all my pervy PM's?>


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## Spicy

Faithful Wife said:


> This is gross. I remember a rando PM or two long time ago but nothing since then.
> 
> If I get any I will definitely forward them. I don’t get why people would do this here. There are so many places where people can chat or flirt or whatever they want to do. We aren’t here for that and it’s gross.
> 
> Thanks for your attention and time, mods.


:iagree:

What she said. Nobody likes me either @She'sStillGotIt. Even that perv @ConanHub doesn’t PM me. :crying:>


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## Andy1001

I’ve been threatened by pm.
I’ve been asked for money. 
No offer of sexual favors though ☹


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## Rubix Cubed

ReformedHubby said:


> Apparently my PM inbox was full, I never deleted any messages so I couldn't receive new ones. I've deleted them now so I guess the pervs will be able to reach me. I will definitely let you know if I get something.


 It was full because they cut the capacity in half when they did the change over with the premium membership stuff.


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## Spicy

@Andy1001 Asked for money?! :surprise:


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## SunCMars

Sorry, we have no control over, The Typist.
He does as he pleases.

Our dear Lilith got a basket full of PM's a year or so ago. 
We can only hope she answered none back.
Or forward.



THRD-


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## ConanHub

I've had a couple weird ones over the years but not from established TAMMERS.


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## ConanHub

Andy1001 said:


> I’ve been threatened by pm.


???


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## arbitrator

Andy1001 said:


> I’ve been threatened by pm.
> I’ve been asked for money.
> *No offer of sexual favors though* ☹


*Hell, Andy! I'd as soon receive the latter in person!*


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## Andy1001

ConanHub said:


> ???


A couple of years ago there was a thread running and I suspected that the op lived under a bridge. He was full of it and I told him. 
He told me to “do myself a favor” and stop commenting on his thread if I wanted to stay healthy.
I was really scared lol.


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## Andy1001

Spicy said:


> @Andy1001 Asked for money?! :surprise:


I was asked to pay for flights for a woman and her husband because her Mom had died. I did so without any expectation of being repaid but a few weeks later she asked me for “a few thousand dollars” because she needed a new car.
I declined and she never posted again on tam.


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## ReformedHubby

Andy1001 said:


> I was asked to pay for flights for a woman and her husband because her Mom had died. I did so without any expectation of being repaid but a few weeks later she asked me for “a few thousand dollars” because she needed a new car.
> I declined and she never posted again on tam.


Ughhh....I hate when that happens. When you're generous you get scammed a lot. I guess all that matters is your heart was in the right place when you gave them the money. 

So anyways, I was wondering can you lend me five bucks? I'll pay you back.


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## EleGirl

Andy1001 said:


> I was asked to pay for flights for a woman and her husband because her Mom had died. I did so without any expectation of being repaid but a few weeks later she asked me for “a few thousand dollars” because she needed a new car.
> I declined and she never posted again on tam.


You actually paid for plane tickets for that person? I'll bet her mother dies several times a year so that she can go around the internet looking for someone who spend money. (Of course she might really be a he, who knows?)


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## Andy1001

EleGirl said:


> You actually paid for plane tickets for that person? I'll bet her mother dies several times a year so that she can go around the internet looking for someone who spend money. (Of course she might really be a he, who knows?)


Her Mom really had died and she sent me proof.
It wasn’t very much money really but I wasn’t paying for her car.


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## Blondilocks

Andy1001 said:


> Her Mom really had died and she sent me proof.
> It wasn’t very much money really but I wasn’t paying for her car.


Was the flight from Michigan to Florida?


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## .339971

I've had messages sent to me before that were interested in a relationship. 'Hi! My name is X. I'm very interested in a relationship with you. Please contact me at XXX-XXX-XXXX or [email protected] 'Huh? What? Uh, no....' Just not here. I always just ignored them.


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## Andy1001

Blondilocks said:


> Was the flight from Michigan to Florida?


I’m not going to name her but she had thousands of posts on tam. As I wrote earlier her mother really had died and she seemed desperate to get back to her home city so I helped her out. 
This was about three years ago and she hasn’t been back on tam since.


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## ReformedHubby

Andy1001 said:


> I’m not going to name her but she had thousands of posts on tam. As I wrote earlier her mother really had died and she seemed desperate to get back to her home city so I helped her out.
> This was about three years ago and she hasn’t been back on tam since.


I so know who it is, pretty sure she hit up some other folks too, for all kinds of expenses here and there. For what its worth I do think she was real, but I think she recognized she could take advantage and ultimately she did.


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## ConanHub

The Outlaw said:


> I've had messages sent to me before that were interested in a relationship. 'Hi! My name is X. I'm very interested in a relationship with you. Please contact me at XXX-XXX-XXXX or [email protected] 'Huh? What? Uh, no....' Just not here. I always just ignored them.


LoL!

Well I'm envious! Never happened though I did get a declaration of love once.:smile2:


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## .339971

ConanHub said:


> LoL!
> 
> Well I'm envious! Never happened though I did get a declaration of love once.:smile2:


I got plenty. I've never felt so special before in my life. :grin2:


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## Spicy

Andy1001 said:


> I’m not going to name her but she had thousands of posts on tam. As I wrote earlier her mother really had died and she seemed desperate to get back to her home city so I helped her out.
> This was about three years ago and she hasn’t been back on tam since.


You are a very kind person. :x


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## Rubix Cubed

ConanHub said:


> LoL!
> 
> Well I'm envious! Never happened though I did get a declaration of love once.:smile2:


 Yeah, sorry about that. I was drunk.


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## EleGirl

ReformedHubby said:


> I so know who it is, pretty sure she hit up some other folks too, for all kinds of expenses here and there. For what its worth I do think she was real, but I think she recognized she could take advantage and ultimately she did.


Now I'm really curious who she is. :nerd:


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## Andy1001

Blondilocks said:


> Was the flight from Michigan to Florida?


I’ve just remembered another person on tam “M” who set up a “go fund me” page to pay for her husband to fly to his home city which as far as I remember was in Florida,because his Mom had died. 
She was genuine I think, but the link she supplied didn’t work. I asked her about it on the thread but she didn’t want to talk about it.


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## MJJEAN

Andy1001 said:


> I was asked to pay for flights for a woman and her husband because her Mom had died. I did so without any expectation of being repaid but a few weeks later she asked me for “a few thousand dollars” because she needed a new car.
> I declined and she never posted again on tam.


That was very kind of you and I am sorry a person you helped was so...rude and ungrateful.


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## Blondilocks

Andy1001 said:


> I’ve just remembered another person on tam “M” who set up a “go fund me” page to pay for her husband to fly to his home city which as far as I remember was in Florida,because his Mom had died.
> She was genuine I think, but the link she supplied didn’t work. I asked her about it on the thread but she didn’t want to talk about it.


I'm glad to hear it wasn't M. Thanks, Andy.

And, remember, no good deed goes unpunished. ha-ha


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## Andy1001

Blondilocks said:


> I'm glad to hear it wasn't M. Thanks, Andy.
> 
> And, remember, no good deed goes unpunished. ha-ha


As they say around here “A fool and his money are soon parted”.


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## ReformedHubby

Andy1001 said:


> As they say around here “A fool and his money are soon parted”.


This was one of my biggest "new money" mistakes. I literally helped any and everybody that had a need. But recently I have stopped just giving people money, because it goes down exactly like you stated. I once bought the seafood guy at my local supermarket a car. Because I saw him riding his bike to work every day, even in the cold and rainy weather. He was overcome with emotion. I felt good about it. Until...he told everyone in the store. Then I couldn't go shopping without hearing hard luck stories from every employee in the store, even he himself kept bringing up other financial needs he had. I've found that when you help someone out. They do appreciate it, but...they also become entitled. Just my experience....


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## Blondilocks

ReformedHubby said:


> This was one of my biggest "new money" mistakes. I literally helped any and everybody that had a need. But recently I have stopped just giving people money, because it goes down exactly like you stated. I once bought the seafood guy at my local supermarket a car. Because I saw him riding his bike to work every day, even in the cold and rainy weather. He was overcome with emotion. I felt good about it. Until...he told everyone in the store. Then I couldn't go shopping without hearing hard luck stories from every employee in the store, even he himself kept bringing up other financial needs he had. I've found that when you help someone out. They do appreciate it, but...they also become entitled. Just my experience....


This is why there are only 4 people on this earth who know my financial status: my Mom, my best friend of 50+ years, my broker and my CPA. To everyone else, I'm just a widow who drives a Nissan.


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## .339971

ReformedHubby said:


> This was one of my biggest "new money" mistakes. I literally helped any and everybody that had a need. But recently I have stopped just giving people money, because it goes down exactly like you stated. I once bought the seafood guy at my local supermarket a car. Because I saw him riding his bike to work every day, even in the cold and rainy weather. He was overcome with emotion. I felt good about it. Until...he told everyone in the store. Then I couldn't go shopping without hearing hard luck stories from every employee in the store, even he himself kept bringing up other financial needs he had. I've found that when you help someone out. They do appreciate it, but...they also become entitled. Just my experience....


I was the same way but more prone to having the life sucked out of me by emotional vampires with a sad story to tell. (And at the worst times in my life) and my heart has always been in the right place but I just don't think properly from time to time. And there's nothing wrong with doing for anyone, but it's sad that you have to keep your eyes peeled to almost everything and everyone around you.


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## JustTheWife

I can't even find my PMs with this new design!


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## JustTheWife

JustTheWife said:


> I can't even find my PMs with this new design!


nevermind..."Conversations"


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## ConanHub

JustTheWife said:


> I can't even find my PMs with this new design!


You should have a square icon in the upper right corner of your page. It should be your avatar. It looks like a J to me.

Tap on it and a drop down menu appears. PM's appear as "conversations" with an envelope symbol next to it.


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## m.t.t

I befriended someone on here through a PM. I've been told I'm way too kind and I was with this person. I gave up a LOT of my time talking to them, they were really mentally unwell and I wanted to help. It just got very weird. I then realized it wasn't only them that had a problem, I had/have boundary issues.


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## EleGirl

m.t.t said:


> I befriended someone on here through a PM. I've been told I'm way too kind and I was with this person. I gave up a LOT of my time talking to them, they were really mentally unwell and I wanted to help. It just got very weird. I then realized it wasn't only them that had a problem, I had/have boundary issues.


It's very easy to get sucked into stuff like this. I've had it happen to me. And once in a while, it turned out that the person I was trying to support via PM was a troll and their entire story was, well a story... a fairy tale.


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## Andy1001

Your name is an anagram of fantasie.
And latrines.


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## Sfort

Well, crap. I never get any PMs! Seriously, everyone I've sent one to has been okay with them and has responded in kind. One person didn't respond. A moderator.


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## Blondilocks

Andy1001 said:


> Your name is an anagram of fantasie.
> And latrines.


I wish I knew what you are on about.


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## Talker67

EleGirl said:


> It's very easy to get sucked into stuff like this. I've had it happen to me. And once in a while, it turned out that the person I was trying to support via PM was a troll and their entire story was, well a story... a fairy tale.


Sadly, it happens a lot. catfishing, trolling, people just trying to get your information for nefarious schemes.
that is why DMs HERE should be a little safer, in that the are not linked in any way to your actual email account.


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## Talker67

Andy1001 said:


> *Your name is an anagram of fantasie.*
> And latrines.


Is this a double secret name, inscribed only on the inside on an elvish ring that was forged under mount mordor?


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## Andy1001

Talker67 said:


> Is this a double secret name, inscribed only on the inside on an elvish ring that was forged under mount mordor?


Yes.


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