# The effects of pornography and Facebook on a marriage



## tigger01 (Oct 12, 2011)

I have some issues/questions regarding pornography, but I am also curious to know how others view Facebook and its effect on a marriage.

Our 17 marriage clearly has had its issues, but up until recently, I seemed to be content with these "issues." My biggest and most trying issue, however, (as of the last couple of years especially) has been our extreme lack of intimacy. Although we have been intimate in other ways, we have not had actual intercourse in six years! I've gotten the typical .... I know, I know, I know; it'll get better; maybe when I lose some weight; I'm not 18 anymore, etc. Another issue that been in place since the time I started dating him is his interest in pornography. He has never kept or viewed this material in front of me, but every few years (after he's given me the same song and dance about getting rid of it all), I find it all over again. I have a very good friend who feels that pornography, itself, cannot satisfy a man entirely. Is he, therefore, finding it elsewhere? Another woman, perhaps? I would very much appreciate some honest answers regarding men and pornography.

As for Facebook. About six months ago I reconnected with someone from my past, and I guess I never realized how vulnerable I was. I find myself looking foward to his daily emails, but yet at the same time, I have never felt lonelier. I find myself re-evaluating my marriage as a whole, but is it Facebook/this particular individual who is causing me to take a closer look at my marriage? If it weren't for Facebook and this reconnection, would I, otherwise, still be content with our marital issues? Is simply being content, however, a way to live out a marriage? Is is FB, my marriage in general or both that is causing me to feel so lonely and restless?

I know I've thrown a lot out there. Any advice/personal stories would be most appreciated! Thank you in advance!


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

Facebook and porn aside, the fact you haven't had intercourse in 6 years is a ginormous red flag right there. I would say you have HUGE intimacy issues, which he turns to porn to deal with and you turn to other people, which right now is another man, which is going to lead to you cheating if you haven't already done so. EA at least.

I've posted my view of porn elsewhere, but I don't see men looking at porn as a huge issue in itself, in an otherwise healthy relationship. Which yours does NOT seem to be.


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## Skate Daddy 9 (Sep 19, 2011)

As a guy I have to say that Porn is a joke. There is nothing arousing or satisfying about it. The only thing that is really satisfying in life is making love to a woman you love. My wife and I are not having sex 8 days a week or anything but there is problem if you have not had it for six years. He must have some other outlet or issue because I would explode if I went that long. You both seem to be looking to have your needs met outside of your marriage and that is not good at all. I think you need some counseling.


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## CandieGirl (Apr 27, 2011)

You have both turned outside the marriage for satisfaction...throw out your computers...;-)


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## KenCasanova (Jan 3, 2012)

"we have not had actual intercourse in six years!"


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## DownUnder (Jul 30, 2011)

KenCasanova said:


> "we have not had actual intercourse in six years!"


:iagree:

wow that is a mighty looooonnggg time without sex or intimacy....and i thought i had it bad with my low sex drive 

I agree with CandieGirl.....you need to throw out the computer and focus on each other.


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