# Disappointments that make you LOL!



## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

I'm laying in bed a couple of nights ago and my wife is in the master bath with the door closed. I repeatedly heard the sound of water being turned on and off and a tapping sound. With our anniversary today, I'm thinking "she's finally shaving the honey pot like I have been asking her to do for a little while now. I got excited thinking about it and was excited to find out. When she got out of the bathroom, I asked her what was all the tapping noises that I heard - did you shave? She said "No, I was scrubbing my big toes with a toothbrush so that I do not get ingrown nails." 

That was a boner deflater... :rofl:


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## happy as a clam (Jan 5, 2014)

Now THAT made me laugh... Way to take the wind right out of your sails!

:lol: :rofl:


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## happy as a clam (Jan 5, 2014)

Ok, here's mine... (although not quite as titillating a tale as yours @Plan 9 from OS)

The other day I heard some rattling around in the garage so I peeked out out to see my sexy SO with the Harley out in the driveway. He had his sunglasses on, was polishing up the seats, wiping things down, tinkering with the bike. I heard that lovely engine rumble to life and thought to myself, "Oh goodie, we're going for a RIDE!!" (Anyone who knows me knows that I practically melt at the thought of riding on the back of that bike with my arms wrapped around my hunky SO -- it's almost as exciting as sex, lol!)

I quickly changed into my "cool" jeans, put my hair into a ponytail (anticipating tucking it up into my "cool" biker hat ) and was deciding between chaps or no-chaps when I heard the engine die. A few minutes later sexy SO comes striding into the house and tossed the bike keys into the basket. I said, "What are you doing? Aren't we going for a RIDE???!!!"

"No," he said, "I was _winterizing_ the bike." I peeked into the garage again to see the Harley tucked snugly away under it's cover until Spring.


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## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

happy as a clam said:


> Ok, here's mine... (although not quite as titillating a tale as yours @Plan 9 from OS)
> 
> The other day I heard some rattling around in the garage so I peeked out out to see my sexy SO with the Harley out in the driveway. He had his sunglasses on, was polishing up the seats, wiping things down, tinkering with the bike. I heard that lovely engine rumble to life and thought to myself, "Oh goodie, we're going for a RIDE!!" (Anyone who knows me knows that I practically melt at the thought of riding on the back of that bike with my arms wrapped around my hunky SO -- it's almost as exciting as sex, lol!)
> 
> ...


He coulda taken you out one more time, but I'm sure he gave you a nice consolation prize.


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## Young at Heart (Jan 6, 2015)

People who want sex really need to go with the flow and ask for it.



Plan 9 from OS said:


> ... I got excited thinking about it and was excited to find out.
> 
> .....She said "No, I was scrubbing my big toes with a toothbrush so that I do not get ingrown nails."
> 
> That was a boner deflater... :rofl:


You could have told her you though she was prepping for sex and since she worked on her toes, how about exploring your developing a foot fetish with her feet. Maybe by starting with your massaging her feet and seeing where that leads.



happy as a clam said:


> Ok, here's mine... (although not quite as titillating a tale as yours @Plan 9 from OS)..... (Anyone who knows me knows that I practically melt at the thought of riding on the back of that bike with my arms wrapped around my hunky SO -- it's almost as exciting as sex, lol!)
> 
> I quickly changed into my "cool" jeans, put my hair into a ponytail (anticipating tucking it up into my "cool" biker hat ) and was deciding between chaps or no-chaps when I heard the engine die. A few minutes later sexy SO comes striding into the house and tossed the bike keys into the basket. I said, "What are you doing? Aren't we going for a RIDE???!!!"
> 
> "No," he said, "I was _winterizing_ the bike." I peeked into the garage again to see the Harley tucked snugly away under it's cover until Spring.


You could have told your SO that you got all dressed up for a ride and if he wasn't going to take you for a ride on the bike, he have better come to bed with you and take you for a ride there, as you considered his playing with the bike as foreplay.

When life hands you a lemon, try to make lemonade out of it. Even if you are turned down, you might get a good laugh out of it and/or tell your SO something about your sexual interests that will get them thinking about sex with you.


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## happy as a clam (Jan 5, 2014)

Young at Heart said:


> People who want sex really need to go with the flow and ask for it.


Ok, I agree with this. Thanks for the suggestions.

But anyone who knows me (including many "regular" TAMers) knows I get PLENTY of sex. So no real need to "ask" for it... Despite the lack of a motorcycle ride we still had plenty of "fun" that afternoon (as Plan 9 alluded to.)

Besides, my interpretation of this thread is that it was meant to be a bit humorous and tongue-in-cheek .

_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Young at Heart (Jan 6, 2015)

happy as a clam said:


> ....Besides, my interpretation of this thread is that it was meant to be a bit humorous and tongue-in-cheek .
> 
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


His tongue in which cheek? :surprise:


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## happy as a clam (Jan 5, 2014)

Young at Heart said:


> His tongue in which cheek? :surprise:


:lol:
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

Young at Heart said:


> His tongue in which cheek? :surprise:


All this time, when I heard my wife talking about how her friend was french kissing some ass, I didn't realize that she was talking about...that...


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

I was once being playful with my wife and I placed post it notes inside her cloths while she was in the shower. Two post it notes inside her bra said how much I love her boobies, and then a third in her underwear with the word "growl!" written on it. 

...so my wife gets out of the shower and gets dressed. She went to put on her underwear first and found my "growl!" note and could not make any sense of it and got confused. I looked at her to get her reaction, and she seriously thought our maid had left the note as a passive aggressive way to say, "stop leaving your underwear all over the floor!" I then showed her the other post it notes I left in her bra just to get her to calm down.

Cheers, 
Badsanta


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## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

badsanta said:


> I was once being playful with my wife and I placed post it notes inside her cloths while she was in the shower. Two post it notes inside her bra said how much I love her boobies, and then a third in her underwear with the word "growl!" written on it.
> 
> ...so my wife gets out of the shower and gets dressed. She went to put on her underwear first and found my "growl!" note and could not make any sense of it and got confused. I looked at her to get her reaction, and she seriously thought our maid had left the note as a passive aggressive way to say, "stop leaving your underwear all over the floor!" I then showed her the other post it notes I left in her bra just to get her to calm down.
> 
> ...


If you wouldn't of told her, she would have looked at the maid in a different light after seeing the bra notes.


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## bb-jay (Dec 15, 2015)

I remember one time shortly after my gf moved in with me, I went out and left her at home. We were chatting, flirting, sexting and I was loving it. My engines were revving and I couldn't wait to get home. I tried hard to observe speed limits and red lights. On getting home, I meet her in bed in tshirt and panties and I go straight for her. We start making out like crazy while my maddening erection is seemingly poking her in the right places.

Then suddenly she shuts her thighs and crosses her legs and tells me "aunty Flo arrived heavily a lil while ago"



[email protected]%&# I hate aunty Flo!


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