# sexless marriage



## safc1973 (Jan 10, 2016)

is this normal ,no oral sex i 3 years ,not a kiss in 2 years ,no sex in months and months if so no kissing just like rape thats how it feels to me no touches no cuddles nothing am i doing right thing by staying


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## [email protected] (Jun 8, 2017)

Well have you talked to your partner and explained how you feel? After you do if nothing changes life is too short to settle for no compassionate love with your mate it may be time to move on if they can't give in to your needs.


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

Get ready...Safron C !

I see a muddy boulder rolling down a muddy hill. 

Soon to collect every stone, stick, two-cent piece in it's path and on the way down.

Down will be have you in butt planted, in another County Seat, in another life.


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## DayOne (Sep 19, 2014)

And what have you done to resolve this in the last 15 months since your last post, which said the same thing?


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## Holdingontoit (Mar 7, 2012)

Are you doing the right thing by passively staying in a sexless marriage? No.
Is divorce the answer? Can't tell yet.
What have you tried to change? Who are you willing to be? How much are you willing to demand of yourself?


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## jetzon (Mar 16, 2015)

something is not right here , theres something ur not telling , cuz married couples dont live this way !


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## Holdingontoit (Mar 7, 2012)

Yes, they do. Been married 25 years. First 23 were mostly sexless (<10 times per year) despite my chasing, MC, ST, the works. Last 2 have been entirely sexless. My choice. I got tired of chasing. Tired of rejection. So now we simply don't. At all. Marriage is better than it ever was while I was chasing her for sex. Kids are thriving.

Yes, married people do live like this. I don't suggest it to anyone. I am a warped and broken shard of the person I was and could have been. But it can be done and it is being done.


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## Tomara (Jun 19, 2013)

At any time did you have a good sex life? I too would like to know more info, very little info to go on.

However, not normal in the least.


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## katiecrna (Jan 29, 2016)

Sexless marriage can due to a partner with a low drive or it can just be a symptom of a crappy marriage. 

Before calling it quits, focus on improving your marriage. Spend more time together, date each other, start to be more affectionate. You need to put effort into falling in love with your spouse again. Sometimes we became roommates and lose the sexual passion with each other. 

Sometimes people, often time men think that the sex should always be there in a marriage, no matter what. But being a women, for me to want to have sex I need to feel loved and feel a connection with my husband. If I'm constantly neglected as a women/wife the last thing I want to do is have Sex.


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

Some do. But its a terrible situation for the person who wants intimacy in their marriage. 



jetzon said:


> something is not right here , theres something ur not telling , cuz married couples dont live this way !


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## safc1973 (Jan 10, 2016)

yes it is probably the same message just feeling down like i did then i have tried talking,and part of the reason i havent walked away is becuse of money,i know if i went my wife would not be able to pay her way and i couldnt afford to pay both,i stlll love her loads it is just there is no physical relationship at 47 i dont think iam over the hill yet


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## safc1973 (Jan 10, 2016)

this has probably went on for the last 2 years before that it was fine,i know she isnt having affair and iam not she just has no urges to be intimate,as i said to someone else i cant leave its all down to money and would hate to see her hard up


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

safc1973 said:


> yes it is probably the same message just feeling down like i did then i have tried talking,and part of the reason i havent walked away is becuse of money,i know if i went my wife would not be able to pay her way and i couldnt afford to pay both,i stlll love her loads it is just there is no physical relationship at 47 i dont think iam over the hill yet


Supporting herself will become her problem. Does she work? If not, you should encourage her to do so. You may owe her alimony, but if you haven't been married long (less than 10 years, typically), it would probably just be to bridge her needs until she can support herself.

Besides, you may have less money, but you will have a chance at happiness. That's invaluable.


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