# My girlfriend cheated on me with my dad ??



## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

Me and my girlfriend have been together for 3 years since I we were 18.



My girlfriend and father last night set me down to tell me they had a 2 year long affair that ended a week ago. They've been wanting to tell me since then but didn't have the hearts. I always knew they got on well, they bonded over many shared interests, but I never saw this coming.

I feel completely sick. I haven't eaten hardly anything since they told me. I haven't officially broken up with her yet, but it is obvious as I haven't responded to any of the texts/calls she's sent. When they first told me and after it had sank in, I left and haven't said a word to anyone outside of work since. I've been a total ghost to my whole family and friend group.

My dad and I are very close. For my whole life I have looked up to him. He and my mom divorced when I was a teenager but they have been very friendly to each other which made the process so much easier. I want to forgive my dad. But if my girlfriend had cheated on me with another person, I would easily cut them both off. And in a weird way my dad has hurt me so much more by doing this than she has. I could get over a cheating girlfriend. But my relationship with my father, a relationship I cherished, is destroyed. And it's his fault.

My question is this: Should I forgive my father? How can I forgive him? Should I tell my mom or brother? Would I be cruel for completely cutting him off which is what my heart it telling me to do?


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

Man that's a tough one. I'm sure your dad didn't set out to hurt you, but like the old saying a hard **** has no conscience. I wouldn't talk to either of them until you know you are ready to. Your dad will always be your dad, but your GF is very replaceable.


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## Taxman (Dec 21, 2016)

No! There is a line, and decent people will not cross it. If it were me, I would go to my father, tell him I love him very much, but he had committed a transgression that unfortunately is NOT FORGIVABLE. I would ask both of them to never contact me again. I happen to be vindictive, and would likely rat him out to the family.

And a big PS here. 
They kept it quiet for a very long time, because they knew they were both in the wrong. They still are.


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

Taxman said:


> No! There is a line, and decent people will not cross it. If it were me, I would go to my father, tell him I love him very much, but he had committed a transgression that unfortunately is NOT FORGIVABLE. I would ask both of them to never contact me again. I happen to be vindictive, and would likely rat him out to the family.
> 
> And a big PS here.
> They kept it quiet for a very long time, because they knew they were both in the wrong. They still are.


I know right. 
Im telling my family for sure


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## TJW (Mar 20, 2012)

Journeyman101 said:


> My relationship with my father, a relationship I cherished, is destroyed. And it's his fault.


Yep. It sure is. His fault, his alone. He is, ostensibly, an adult. You are an innocent bystander, "collateral damage".



Journeyman101 said:


> Should I forgive my father?


 Yes, in time, you should. Not for his sake, but for yours. Carrying unforgiveness in your heart is toxic to you. It's somewhat like ingesting poison and expecting the other person to die. Your animus toward your father is justified, but it's poison.



Journeyman101 said:


> How can I forgive him?


 There's an old adage which says "...to err is human, to forgive, Divine...". In order for us to forgive, we must have the help of God. God is the only way and means through which we can forgive.



Journeyman101 said:


> Should I tell my mom or brother?


 Yes, you should tell your mom. Your brother, only if he currently is, or when he becomes, an adult.



Journeyman101 said:


> Would I be cruel for completely cutting him off which is what my heart it telling me to do?


 No, you would not be necessarily cruel. It is not cruel, nor is it wrong, to protect ourselves against further harm from those who have a demonstrated, depraved indifference toward our emotional welfare. Just don't seek revenge through excommunication. Do it FOR YOU, not to hurt him.

Your question about telling your mom and brother is even more apropos when considered with this question. Your family should know, and understand, exactly why you have nothing further to do with your father. (and, your girl friend).

BTW, your girl friend? Trash her like a used kleenex. Forgive her, too, but stay away from her. Forever.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

You can never trust him again. Ever. With anyone or anything.


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## VladDracul (Jun 17, 2016)

Yep, you've got to watch these horny old bastards. Sexuality is the area of the human mind most subject to neurotic behavior. Banging inlaws, best friends spouses, step parents and kids, "hot wives" cuckolding, is oddly considered especially steamy and erotic by more than a few. Apparently your father and girlfriend are among them. You need to ditch both of them but if you want to use the situation to extort a little money out of your old man or keep the girlfriend in inventory for occasional booty call, let'er rip.


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## 3Xnocharm (Jun 22, 2012)

Taxman said:


> No! There is a line, and decent people will not cross it. If it were me, I would go to my father, tell him I love him very much, but he had committed a transgression that unfortunately is NOT FORGIVABLE. I would ask both of them to never contact me again. I happen to be vindictive, and would likely rat him out to the family.
> 
> And a big PS here.
> They kept it quiet for a very long time, because they knew they were both in the wrong. They still are.


I second this. How the hell are you ever supposed to trust him again, especially going forward when you are in new relationships?? This is beyond disgusting, shame on him... make sure EVERYONE knows what he did!


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

VladDracul said:


> Yep, you've got to watch these horny old bastards. Sexuality is the area of the human mind most subject to neurotic behavior. Banging inlaws, best friends spouses, step parents and kids, "hot wives" cuckolding, is oddly considered especially steamy and erotic by more than a few. Apparently your father and girlfriend are among them. You need to ditch both of them but if you want to use the situation to extort a little money out of your old man or keep the girlfriend in inventory for occasional booty call, let'er rip.


Yeag I see it now


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

MattMatt said:


> You can never trust him again. Ever. With anyone or anything.



I got so mad I hit him too


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## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

Dump her, out both of them to all family and friends. Your father is disgusting. Tell him m you might forgive in time, don’t rush it, but for now you don’t want to be anywhere near him.


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## skerzoid (Feb 7, 2017)

Journeyman101

This is a double betrayal of biblical proportions. If your GF is capable of putting this amount of hurt on you, *what is she not capable of?* She has Daddy issues that she will never get over. If she is willing to **** him, who is she not willing to ****? Every time you look at her you will see her ****ing Dear Ol' Dad. She's toast.

As for your father, well the word "unspeakable" comes to mind. The willingness to hurt his own child for lust is indicative of a really sick individual. *He must pay a comparable price for the damage he has done.* 

*Out of curiosity:*

1. *Why* did they break up?

2. *What* exactly did they say?

3. Is there any *remorse* shown by either of them?

4. *Why* did they say they thought they should tell you?

5. *How* is their attitude now?

*Actions you should take:*

6. *Forgive, but never forget.* I would exclude them from my life forever.

7. *You will need IC* (individual counseling) as soon as possible. 

8. *Expose this only to family.* *There is no reason to expose your family to public humiliation.* If he is capable of this, no female relative is safe around him. If friends question the break up, just say she was unfaithful.

9. *I would ghost all communications with both of them.*


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## Taxman (Dec 21, 2016)

Journeyman: Nothing about this is normal or remotely forgivable. Your dad burnt whatever relationship he had with you. I am a firm believer in doing good so that when you are gone, your memory is untarnished. Your father, has forever ruined himself. Nobody will have a good word to say for an old man who steals a mate from his son. As far as your f-ckbuddy, she can rot. If you remember a movie called "Big Daddy" there was an ongoing line about a young woman leaving her mate for an old guy, in that his testes were fairly gross, old and wrinkled. Hope she likes wrinkly teabags. 

There is nothing remotely salvagable in both of these relationships. Your Dad and XGF are both sorry excuses for humans, and as a consequence, let them deal with being social pariahs.


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## dreamer2017 (Nov 7, 2017)

Dearmer,


If I were in your shoes, I wouldn’t and couldn’t forgive either of them. The man you call your father is neither a father nor dad but merely a sperm donor. No responsible father in this world would do something like that. You need to dump your so-called girlfriend by never responding to any acts of communication. I know you are broken and betrayed by two individuals you most love in this life. Your only option is to focus on the wonderful future that awaits you.

Best to you,
Dreamer


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## PreRaph (Jun 13, 2017)

Absolutely unforgivable Journey101. They hid it from you for TWO YEARS. Two years...they ****ed around with each other for TWO YEARS behind your back for god's sake. 

What does their confession mean now? It means next to nothing. If they didn't have the decency to tell you sooner, then there's absolutely nothing that you owe them, period. Kick them both to the curb, just as you are doing. 

I can only imagine how terrible it is for you. Are you still on good terms with your mother? If so, please get help from her and others in your family, and don't talk with either your father or your cheating ex-girlfriend. 

It will take a lot of time, but let this become an opportunity to become free of them and to make yourself a better man who has endured a terrible betrayal and has come out of it stronger.


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## wilson (Nov 5, 2012)

Have you ever heard that fable about the scorpion and the frog?


> A scorpion asks a frog to carry it across a river. The frog hesitates, afraid of being stung by the scorpion, but the scorpion argues that if it did that, they would both drown. The frog considers this argument sensible and agrees to transport the scorpion. The scorpion climbs onto the frog's back and the frog begins to swim, but midway across the river, the scorpion stings the frog, dooming them both. The dying frog asks the scorpion why it stung the frog, to which the scorpion replies "I couldn't help it. It's in my nature."


Basically, your dad is a scorpion who will sting you even if it means you both suffer. With the thousands of other women available to him, he could have easily had a relationship with someone else. Even if the GF was naked and throwing herself at him, he should have refused and then let you know what was going on. If he has no control over his urges, then what's to stop him from doing this in the future? It shows such a lack of decorum and moral foundation that I don't think you can trust him in any area of your life.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Journeyman101 said:


> I got so mad I hit him too


Well, obviously, that's understandable. But please do not hit him again, OK?

Incidentally, why did they stop the affair after so long? 

Did someone find out and threaten to out them?


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

If it was me I would never talk to them again. 

I would also let everyone know what POS they are. 

A man who can do that to his own son is not worth another thought to put it nicely. And will probably never be safe. 

Oh and if he ever starts dating someone his own age, make sure you tell them.


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## jlg07 (Feb 24, 2017)

I agree with all above -- this wasn't a drunken ONS (which I still wouldn't forgive).
Tell them both they are POS's and don't deserve you. Tell them FLAT OUT that they have destroyed the relationship -- tell ALL of her/your friends what a POS she is. 
Tell ALL of your family about your father.

SO Sorry you are going through this.


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

skerzoid said:


> Journeyman101
> 
> This is a double betrayal of biblical proportions. If your GF is capable of putting this amount of hurt on you, *what is she not capable of?* She has Daddy issues that she will never get over. If she is willing to **** him, who is she not willing to ****? Every time you look at her you will see her ****ing Dear Ol' Dad. She's toast.
> 
> ...




Their explanation was pretty much they ****ed up, My dad and her basically bonded over time when I would be at work.

She said that she just felt a connection with him. She said she had a fantasy of sleeping with an older guy but she dosent don't know she kept doing it. 

My dad then told me about the affair and how sorry he was.


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

MattMatt said:


> Journeyman101 said:
> 
> 
> > I got so mad I hit him too
> ...




The gist was basically she loved me and I should forgive her because she made a mistake but hates herself for it. She told me it was just sex and that she wanted to fulfill her fantasy of having sex with an older male teacher before we got married. I didn’t respond to any of these messages or return her calls.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Journeyman101 said:


> The gist was basically she loved me and I should forgive her because she made a mistake but hates herself for it. She told me it was just sex and that she wanted to fulfill her fantasy of having sex with an older male teacher before we got married. I didn’t respond to any of these messages or return her calls.


I assume your young. What you learn in life is, cut out toxic people from your life and you will have a better one. Again a man who could do that to his son is really not worth anything at all. 

See them as dead to you and never talk to them again if you can. Hopefully you don't live with your Dad.


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## Jus260 (Mar 24, 2016)

MattMatt said:


> You can never trust him again. Ever. With anyone or anything.


This is exactly what I thought when I read his question about forgiving his father. If your father steals all of your money and burns your house to the ground, leaving him in the cold when he shows up on the doorstep of your new house has nothing to do with forgiveness. That's just common sense. 

You are supposed to be able to trust your parents with your life. You can't trust a person who would do that for two years.


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## jlg07 (Feb 24, 2017)

Journeyman101 said:


> The gist was basically she loved me and I should forgive her because she made a mistake but hates herself for it. She told me it was just sex and that she wanted to fulfill her fantasy of having sex with an older male teacher before we got married. I didn’t respond to any of these messages or return her calls.


WOW what BS. If she had a fantasy for having sex with a male teacher, that is a ONE TIME thing, not 2 YEARS. She is COMPLETELY full of it. It wasn't a mistake, it was a planned thing for it to have gone on for so long and manipulate you to keep you in the dark.

IF you do respond (and I don't suggest you do ) is to say FU you are full of it and don't contact me again.

Block her from all your media.


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## re16 (Oct 9, 2012)

Journeyman101 said:


> I know right.
> Im telling my family for sure


If you want to find out how much HE wants to fix it, you should tell him that he needs to tell the family to see what he does.

If he truly wants to repair what he did, he would need to step up... I would tell him that he severly damaged your relationship with him, likely permanently, and it will be up to him to put the work in to fix it.


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## Jus260 (Mar 24, 2016)

Journeyman101 said:


> The gist was basically she loved me and I should forgive her because she made a mistake but hates herself for it. She told me it was just sex and that she wanted to fulfill her fantasy of having sex with an older male teacher before we got married. I didn’t respond to any of these messages or return her calls.



Do the three of you currently live together in the same house?


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

sokillme said:


> Journeyman101 said:
> 
> 
> > The gist was basically she loved me and I should forgive her because she made a mistake but hates herself for it. She told me it was just sex and that she wanted to fulfill her fantasy of having sex with an older male teacher before we got married. I didn’t respond to any of these messages or return her calls.
> ...


Yes I do live with him


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## 3Xnocharm (Jun 22, 2012)

Oh man, you need to move someplace else, STAT!


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

Jus260 said:


> Journeyman101 said:
> 
> 
> > The gist was basically she loved me and I should forgive her because she made a mistake but hates herself for it. She told me it was just sex and that she wanted to fulfill her fantasy of having sex with an older male teacher before we got married. I didn’t respond to any of these messages or return her calls.
> ...



Yes


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## jlg07 (Feb 24, 2017)

If the GF lives there, SHE needs to go NOW (or you do to get away from the both of them).

DO NOT talk with them -- look up the 180 -- this is so that you can detach from someone (in your case 2 someones).


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## re16 (Oct 9, 2012)

Dude, you can't live with Dad after this. Who cares if she stays. I would pack my stuff and leave today and not tell them where you are going.


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## Jus260 (Mar 24, 2016)

Journeyman101 said:


> Yes


Can you move in with your mom until you save enough money to get your own place?


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## StillSearching (Feb 8, 2013)

I caught my older brother with my girlfriend when I came home from college early one day. 
I agree it's not like your father, but I canned the GF and gave my brother the cold shoulder for a year. 
We get along fine now 30 years later.
Get away from your Dad for a while, forget the GF.
Blood is thicker than water.
Let him come to you down the road to mend things.


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

Jus260 said:


> Journeyman101 said:
> 
> 
> > Yes
> ...



She lives in Kentucky.

Im In Nevada


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

StillSearching said:


> I caught my older brother with my girlfriend when I came home from college early one day.
> I agree it's not like your father, but I canned the GF and gave my brother the cold shoulder for a year.
> We get along fine now 30 years later.
> Get away from your Dad for a while, forget the GF.
> ...


What was their excuse ??

Hiw did you react when you saw them ?

Did anybody else know ??


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

Journeyman101 said:


> skerzoid said:
> 
> 
> > Journeyman101
> ...


She said she couldnt hold it in any longer.

And they got tired of the charade.


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## Ursula (Dec 2, 2016)

Holy ****, I'm so sorry that this happened to you with 2 people that you care deeply for. I honestly don't know what to say to it, but I would have a huge problem with having either of them in my life after that. If it were my parent, I would try my damndest to forgive them, for me, not for them, but that would probably take some time. I would also consider seeing a therapist to help deal with it all because that's just way too much for you to process by yourself.


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## Bibi1031 (Sep 14, 2015)

"they got tired of the charade? 

:wtf:

This is terrible. They pretty much didn't want or hide this anymore. Which means they are still deep in the affair and no where near ending it. 

Expose and move out. If your mom takes you in, leave everything behind and start new. Your dad sucks rocks! The GF is simply trash and not GF material at all. What a sorry excuse for a woman indeed!

You don't need trash like that in your life. Leave ASAP and never look back. If you don't have children to take care of, any other responsibilities are ditch able in your life at this point in time. Run not walk out of this ****!


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

Bibi1031 said:


> "they got tired of the charade?
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I think she meant they got tired of it all together as to say it " ran its course "


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## re16 (Oct 9, 2012)

Is there any chance that them telling you is so you would bail and they could continue their relationship?


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

re16 said:


> Is there any chance that them telling you is so you would bail and they could continue their relationship?



Im not sure why you say ??


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## Bibi1031 (Sep 14, 2015)

Journeyman101 said:


> Im not sure why you say ??


Because that is what cheaters do! The fact that they are tired of the lies is because they want to come clean for them, not because they betrayed YOU! They are both full of ****! Only two idiots with loose Morales people could think revealing this terrible betrayal would end up in all living in perfect harmony ever after. What a moronic way of thinking! 

Stop thinking there is anything redeemable in those two infidels; They are too darn selfish!


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## re16 (Oct 9, 2012)

Cheaters don't come clean for your benefit. There is selfish motivation on both of their parts for this to come out. I would be heavily suspicious.


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## red oak (Oct 26, 2018)

Journeyman101 said:


> Im not sure why you say ??


You also stated they told you they bonded.....


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## niceguy47460 (Dec 23, 2018)

If she lives with you put her **** on the lawn and tell her to find a new place to live . and then get all the money you can and move the hell out and never speak to him again


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## NobodySpecial (Nov 22, 2013)

Journeyman101 said:


> Me and my girlfriend have been together for 3 years since I we were 18.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I would say that your proposal would be better than my first instinct which would be to shoot him dead.


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## nekonamida (Feb 21, 2017)

re16 said:


> Is there any chance that them telling you is so you would bail and they could continue their relationship?


I can't help but wonder if once you move out and it's clear that you're cutting them off, they won't start back up again. Maybe it wasn't intentional but it's utterly ridiculous that both of them think that after 2 ****ING YEARS of them hooking up behind your back, you should be able to just move on and pretend like it never happened. 

It only ended a week ago. The "break up" is still fresh. For some unknown reason, your father has chosen not to kick her out which strikes me as suspicious after all of this. I wouldn't trust either one of them or speak to either one right now either. They're probably busy "comforting" each other through this.

Move out ASAP. Tell your mom and brother. Reach out to all of your friends. You might be able to sleep on one of their couches for now. Don't go home unless it's with a buddy to get your stuff.


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## farsidejunky (Mar 19, 2014)

Journeyman101 said:


> I think she meant they got tired of it all together as to say it " ran its course "


Sort of like an illness...right?

Sent from my Pixel 3 XL using Tapatalk


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## NextTimeAround (Dec 15, 2011)

Journeyman101 said:


> Yes


that's your big mistake. I'v come to a point in a life in which I don't trust anyone. That means, I would not have any long term visitors in the home that I share with my husband or any kind of partner.


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

nekonamida said:


> re16 said:
> 
> 
> > Is there any chance that them telling you is so you would bail and they could continue their relationship?
> ...


My girlfriend dosent live there but she comes by often


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## re16 (Oct 9, 2012)

What was your sex life like with her during the two year time?


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

niceguy47460 said:


> If she lives with you put her **** on the lawn and tell her to find a new place to live . and then get all the money you can and move the hell out and never speak to him again


She dosent live with us.

She just spend days at a time over here


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

re16 said:


> What was your sex life like with her during the two year time?


I guess it was ok.

Just like other women there's be lengths of time she didnt want to have sex and stuff.

Other than that It was ok


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## re16 (Oct 9, 2012)

I can almost guarantee that someone else caught them and that is why they decided to come clean to you. They were probably told to tell or that person would expose.


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## re16 (Oct 9, 2012)

Journeyman101 said:


> I guess it was ok.
> 
> Just like other women there's be lengths of time she didnt want to have sex and stuff.
> 
> Other than that It was ok


At 19 or 20 years old? No, you should be like rabbits.


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

NobodySpecial said:


> Journeyman101 said:
> 
> 
> > Me and my girlfriend have been together for 3 years since I we were 18.
> ...


I ACTUALLY punched him up a bit and I will NEVER apologize for it either.

Im surprised he didnt call the cops.


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## dubsey (Feb 21, 2013)

when you finally respond to your GF, just ask her this...

what's the point of continuing to be a couple? What, we're going to get married some day? Have kids? Go to Grandpa's and visit, and say, "hey wifey, remember those 2 years you were f'n grandpa? Those were good times, weren't they?"

I mean seriously...


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

re16 said:


> I can almost guarantee that someone else caught them and that is why they decided to come clean to you. They were probably told to tell or that person would expose.


Why you think that??


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

dubsey said:


> when you finally respond to your GF, just ask her this...
> 
> what's the point of continuing to be a couple? What, we're going to get married some day? Have kids? Go to Grandpa's and visit, and say, "hey wifey, remember those 2 years you were f'n grandpa? Those were good times, weren't they?"
> 
> ...


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## re16 (Oct 9, 2012)

Journeyman101 said:


> Why you think that??


Think about it, your dad knew that this would be extremely painful to admit and your girlfriend knows that this could be very embarrasing.

Why wouldn't they just stop and agree to keep it quite? Do you think they told you out of the goodness of their hearts? They were already banging for two years. TWO YEARS.

There is a reason it is coming out, you'll be the last to know.

We see these kinds of people on here all the time, and they operate with the same MO.


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## TJW (Mar 20, 2012)

Journeyman101 said:


> Why you think that??


Because, we have all been victims of cheaters in our pasts. We read the Cheater's Handbook, attended the classes of Cheating 101, 102, 201, and 202, and we know that cheaters do not usually "volunteer" to come clean. They have to be caught. And, then, when they're caught, they don't immediately "own" their actions. There is a period of at least months, and sometimes years, of "trickle truth", during which the betrayed has to engage in cross-examination in order to find out what really happened.

Trust me on this one. Get out. All the way out, from both of them. Allow neither one to pass go, neither one collects $ 200, go directly to jail.
Now. Don't wait even until tomorrow.


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## NobodySpecial (Nov 22, 2013)

dubsey said:


> when you finally respond to your GF, just ask her this...
> 
> what's the point of continuing to be a couple? What, we're going to get married some day? Have kids? Go to Grandpa's and visit, and say, "hey wifey, remember those 2 years you were f'n grandpa? Those were good times, weren't they?"
> 
> I mean seriously...


Kids, we did a DNA test on you. G'pa is really your father.


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

I'm so sorry journeyman. 

I pretty much have the same advice as the others. Ditch the girlfriend yesterday. As for your dad, tell him the relationship is suspended indefinitely. Maybe 10 years down the road when time has smoothed out some of the pain the two of you can start talking again and maybe come to some kind of parity. 

Tell him if he wants any chance of ever having a relationship with you that he is to go to your mom and brother, confess to them and apologize. 

Do your mom and brother know yet? If so, what was their reaction?


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

bandit.45 said:


> I'm so sorry journeyman.
> 
> I pretty much have the same advice as the others. Ditch the girlfriend yesterday. As for your dad, tell him the relationship is suspended indefinitely. Maybe 10 years down the road when time has smoothed out some of the pain the two of you can start talking again and maybe come to some kind of parity.
> 
> ...


Ill be telling them tonite


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## wilson (Nov 5, 2012)

Part of the problem with trying to work it out with your dad is that the same flaws that allowed him to sleep with your GF are the same flaws that will make recovery difficult. He'll have a 1000 reasons why the sex didn't matter, that you should get over it, how he's too busy to go to counseling and work on himself, etc. etc. etc. He will not have the maturity and self-awareness to realize the severity of what he did and what he needs to do to fix it. If he was the kind of person who was capable of repairing the relationship, he wouldn't have done it in the first place.


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

re16 said:


> Journeyman101 said:
> 
> 
> > Why you think that??
> ...


Embarassing for her and painful for him ??


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## re16 (Oct 9, 2012)

Journeyman101 said:


> Embarassing for her and painful for him ??


They had every reason not to tell you is my point. There is an external factor forcing them to admit it.

Regardless of that, you need to get yourself out of that house ASAP and tell the girlfriend to never contact you again.


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## Taxman (Dec 21, 2016)

OK Journeyman, now it is time to do what you need to do. First, inform every living relative on his side of the family. Start it off with Dad is a dirty old pervert and laid my wife. If you have any secrets that you have been holding as a courtesy to dear old dad, make sure everyone gets the info (one of my clients got arrested for exposing himself. When his wife discovered that he was having an affair, every one of his relatives, business contacts, coworkers, employers and all friends received a copy of his arrest report, his mug shot and his conviction). He needs to die figuratively of embarrassment. On her end, let everyone know she gave herself over to a gross pervert. Let her know that the marriage is done, and for her betrayal, anything that she would have gotten in a normal divorce is forfeit. Tell her that she should go quietly or the same fate befalling your father will befall her. I had one female client, that had betrayed her husband with an older executive at work. A letter with pictures was sent to every executive, every coworker, every subordinate, the CEO, CFO and the board. He was a year from retirement, and he was unceremoniously dropped for cause, and his pension was forfeit. She endured a few more days of people talking behind her back, snickers, derision, and finally expulsion for cause. The both lost everything because of this. Doing this to a son? To a husband? These people need to be locked in a room and left to decay.


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

Journeyman101 said:


> Embarassing for her and painful for him ??


My guess is he made the decision for both of them. He probably feels like a piece of sh*t and told you out of guilt, but it may also be because the dad part of him doesn't want you possibly marrying a person as immoral as him. In his own weird and fricked up way, he might actually be trying to do the right thing to protect you. 

I dunno... all I know is you need to get that sleazy woman out of your life forever as quickly as you can.


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## re16 (Oct 9, 2012)

Taxman said:


> OK Journeyman, now it is time to do what you need to do. First, inform every living relative on his side of the family. Start it off with Dad is a dirty old pervert and laid my wife. If you have any secrets that you have been holding as a courtesy to dear old dad, make sure everyone gets the info (one of my clients got arrested for exposing himself. When his wife discovered that he was having an affair, every one of his relatives, business contacts, coworkers, employers and all friends received a copy of his arrest report, his mug shot and his conviction). He needs to die figuratively of embarrassment. On her end, let everyone know she gave herself over to a gross pervert. Let her know that the marriage is done, and for her betrayal, anything that she would have gotten in a normal divorce is forfeit. Tell her that she should go quietly or the same fate befalling your father will befall her. I had one female client, that had betrayed her husband with an older executive at work. A letter with pictures was sent to every executive, every coworker, every subordinate, the CEO, CFO and the board. He was a year from retirement, and he was unceremoniously dropped for cause, and his pension was forfeit. She endured a few more days of people talking behind her back, snickers, derision, and finally expulsion for cause. The both lost everything because of this. Doing this to a son? To a husband? These people need to be locked in a room and left to decay.


I don't think they are married. 21 years old.


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## re16 (Oct 9, 2012)

Just to make sure it is said, don't have sex with her or if you do (bad idea), be sure it is protected.

Depending on how crazy she is, she could try to get knocked up to keep you.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

I would call your mom and ask to move in where her in Kentucky and do so. Then I would convince myself that an asteroid feel on the house and never talk to those POS again. I would not have anything but a superficial relationship with my father ever again. What would be the advantage? Something is horribly wrong with him and his nothing else but dangerous. 

See this part of your life as over.


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

sokillme said:


> I would call your mom and ask to move in where her in Kentucky and do so. Then I would convince myself that an asteroid feel on the house and never talk to those POS again. I would not have anything but a superficial relationship with my father ever again. What would be the advantage? Something is horribly wrong with him and his nothing else but dangerous.
> 
> See this part of your life as over.


I agree


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## Taxman (Dec 21, 2016)

Whether you are married to her or not, exposure should serve as a sentence for her bad behavior. Move in with your Mom, ask her if there was any infidelity that led to her marriage to your father breaking up. If so, then tell Mom that you will be exposing Dad on that matter as well. This is a despicable man with no boundaries whatsoever. It would serve him well to be brought down to earth. As far as the entire situation goes, get the heck out of Dodge. Let the two of them deal with the fallout.


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## 3Xnocharm (Jun 22, 2012)

sokillme said:


> I would call your mom and ask to move in where her in Kentucky and do so. Then I would convince myself that an asteroid feel on the house and never talk to those POS again. I would not have anything but a superficial relationship with my father ever again. What would be the advantage? Something is horribly wrong with him and his nothing else but dangerous.
> 
> See this part of your life as over.


Agree. A fresh new start away from all the trash and the bullcrap.


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## LeGenDary_Man (Sep 25, 2013)

This is the most shocking story I have come across in a while. What did I just read.


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## Journeyman101 (Mar 11, 2019)

LeGenDary_Man said:


> This is the most shocking story I have come across in a while. What did I just read.



Yay me


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## NobodySpecial (Nov 22, 2013)

Journeyman101 said:


> Yay me


It's not you. Your "dad" is a sick mo fo.


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## Lostinthought61 (Nov 5, 2013)

i would also expose her to her parent.....her father would go ballistic.


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## Haydawolive (Mar 10, 2019)

This is sick. There is something wrong with both of them. 

I don't know how you will recover from this. Especially if you keep both of them in your life.

Don't surround yourself with sorry a** people. They are disgusting. You sound like you are intelligent and capable of making wise decisions. Allow yourself to step out of that cloud of toxicity. Get counseling and salvage whats left of your self esteem. Move on and don't look back. You are better off without them.


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## Jus260 (Mar 24, 2016)

Journeyman101 said:


> Yay me


This is not a contest. Everyone starting threads on this board is in a bad place. This is actually a good thing that you found out at such a young age and not 20 years from now. You could have found out after being married with kids.

This is like being diagnosed with stage 1 pancreatic cancer where you found something that is rarely caught early, the diagnosis is scary, but moving forward, the outlook is positive.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

We have been trolled.


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## 3Xnocharm (Jun 22, 2012)

EleGirl said:


> We have been trolled.


Dammit! I hate when I fall for it...


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## syhoybenden (Feb 21, 2013)

Doh.


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## re16 (Oct 9, 2012)

Damn.


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## wilson (Nov 5, 2012)

EleGirl said:


> We have been trolled.


In that case, I'm glad his dad cheated on him with his GF! Considering that a troll can't satisfy a woman, it's really no surprise. That's what a worthless troll deserves!


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

Journeyman101 said:


> Me and my girlfriend have been together for 3 years since I we were 18.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Your father is deranged. Cut him completely out of your life. Expose him to everyone. He is not to be trusted and everyone needs warned.

The girlfriend is a no brainer. She is simply disgusting and I would warn people about her too.

Move on and away from these deranged and extremely damaged morons.


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

Yup...


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