# Jumping back out there with online dating..



## purplebubblegum

After creating and deleting "Online Dating" profiles for a while now. I dont know how to say looking for a semi-serious relationship. What I mean is if I put

*Looking for Friends: Then it seems I am not in interested in a relationship
*Short Term: Nothing serious (which leaves the DOOR wide open for cheating)
*Long term: Looking for Marriage
*Casual: Is sex

I am probably excepting TOO much from a stranger. Here's the deal.

*I want friends if it develops into something more then I want a one on one relationship(no seeing other ppl) but not so serious its leading to marriage. But I dont want a cheater to think friends with benefits either. If there a middle ground? Sometimes my profiles come off too relaxed about it and sometimes I feel like my profiles are to "b1tchy or bossy". So I just delete them. And start over a few months later. 

I love for a relationship to develop from friends into something special. A nice flow nothing too fast but a nice pace. Sometimes it seems ppl are going long at a good pace and then the other person dives in HEAD first. Your left tryring to back peddle to the start. 

Any advice?


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## Hope1964

I'm over 50 so what do I know, but how about NON online dating? You know, the old fashioned way where you go out and actually MEET people?


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## Andy1001

purplebubblegum said:


> After creating and deleting "Online Dating" profiles for a while now. I dont know how to say looking for a semi-serious relationship. What I mean is if I put
> 
> *Looking for Friends: Then it seems I am not in interested in a relationship
> *Short Term: Nothing serious (which leaves the DOOR wide open for cheating)
> *Long term: Looking for Marriage
> *Casual: Is sex
> 
> I am probably excepting TOO much from a stranger. Here's the deal.
> 
> *I want friends if it develops into something more then I want a one on one relationship(no seeing other ppl) but not so serious its leading to marriage. But I dont want a cheater to think friends with benefits either. If there a middle ground? Sometimes my profiles come off too relaxed about it and sometimes I feel like my profiles are to "b1tchy or bossy". So I just delete them. And start over a few months later.
> 
> I love for a relationship to develop from friends into something special. A nice flow nothing too fast but a nice pace. Sometimes it seems ppl are going long at a good pace and then the other person dives in HEAD first. Your left tryring to back peddle to the start.
> 
> Any advice?


Instead of trying the nightmare that is online dating why not just try and make some friends who you share similar interests with.Checkout meetup.com it is not a dating site but a way for people to meet others and share hobbies etc.There is almost always a hiking group in every area or a group interested in photography or nature.Go to your nearest dog shelter and start walking the dogs when you have time.Dogs are a great way of meeting people and chatting.
Online dating is a crap shoot,half the people are allready in relationships and just looking for ons,plus you never really know who you are dealing with.Meet real people and make friendships,then see what develops.


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## jb02157

All I hear on TAM and elsewhere about on-line dating is that's it's full of players and those who want to take advantage of your wanting to find a relationship or marriage. I would also recommend going about dating the old-fashioned way, without damn computers to screw everything up.


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## Elizabeth001

I deleted all of my accounts. I met nothing but losers. 


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## FeministInPink

Elizabeth001 said:


> I deleted all of my accounts. I met nothing but losers.


I agree. I found nothing worth my time via online dating. Mostly horny men looking for easy sex. So I deleted my accounts. A month later, I met my partner the old fashioned way... at a happy hour, introduced by a friend who hoped we would click. I wasn't necessarily interested, but he pursued me and here we are, more than a year later.

If we break up, I have no plans on going back to online dating. Not worth the hassle.


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## Vinnydee

If you are using one of the substantial paid online dating services, your chances are very good. I have three friends, two male and one female that met online and are married for a long time. The female even found a guy who was OK with an open marriage. So take heart and avoid the free sites. You get a bunch of people too cheap to spend the money to find love which is a good indicator of how serious they are to find a serious long term relationship. 

Women will be flooded with responses while men may have to try for several weeks. Just the nature of the beast. What I found interesting from my two male friends who met their wives online was that a lot of the women they met wanted to have sex on the first date. One friend said that he would have sex at noon with one women, change the sheets and then have sex with another women at night. The other male friend said that he took his first date to see a popular play on Broadway and halfway through she asked him if he wanted to go back to his place and have sex. She had kids so while they thought she was at a play, she used the time to have sex so she could get back home in time for prepare dinner. 

Depending on your age there are a lot of horny divorced women out there who have not had sex in a very long time. So while you may not find our soul mate quickly, you can have some fun while you wait to find her.


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## Elizabeth001

Vinnydee said:


> Depending on your age there are a lot of horny divorced women out there who have not had sex in a very long time. So while you may not find our soul mate quickly, you can have some fun while you wait to find her.



Thanks for making my & Fips point. 

lol 


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## Rowan

I actually had a pretty good experience with online dating. However, I also stayed away from the sites that, at least in my area, are known for mostly casual hookups. I also exclusively joined sites that charged a membership fee, as the free ones seemed more popular with the random-pickup crowd I was trying to avoid. 

Beyond that, I was also very, very, clear - both with myself and with the men I met - about what I was looking for, and not looking for. In my case, I was looking for a relationship with the right person. I was not interested in casual hookups or friends with benefits. I was also not desperate for a man and was not willing to settle just to secure a relationship. I was open to the possibility of marriage, but was in no hurry to get there. I think truly knowing what you want, and don't want, and being able to communicate that to others is really the place to start - whether you're using online dating sites or just meeting people the old fashioned way.

So, OP, if the site you're using is asking you to check a box regarding what you're looking for, then select whichever one (or more than one) seems most appropriate to you. Use your profile to clarify exactly what you're seeking. Then discuss expectations, yours and his, with any man you start dating. Just make sure you're both clearly on the same page regarding what you're looking for, so that no one gets hurt.


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## Elizabeth001

Vinnydee said:


> If you are using one of the substantial paid online dating services, your chances are very good. I have three friends, two male and one female that met online and are married for a long time. The female even found a guy who was OK with an open marriage. So take heart and avoid the free sites. You get a bunch of people too cheap to spend the money to find love which is a good indicator of how serious they are to find a serious long term relationship.
> 
> 
> 
> Women will be flooded with responses while men may have to try for several weeks. Just the nature of the beast. What I found interesting from my two male friends who met their wives online was that a lot of the women they met wanted to have sex on the first date. One friend said that he would have sex at noon with one women, change the sheets and then have sex with another women at night. The other male friend said that he took his first date to see a popular play on Broadway and halfway through she asked him if he wanted to go back to his place and have sex. She had kids so while they thought she was at a play, she used the time to have sex so she could get back home in time for prepare dinner.
> 
> 
> 
> Depending on your age there are a lot of horny divorced women out there who have not had sex in a very long time. So while you may not find our soul mate quickly, you can have some fun while you wait to find her.




Btw...other than your first paragraph, your response was of no help to the OP. Unless she is gay and looking for lots of pvssy. Which is cool...if that's what you're looking for. 

I don't think she is and I don't think her idea of "fun" is the same as yours. 

OTOH, you pointed out the obvious. There are a lot of recently divorced women out there who were hurt deeply enough to leave the POS they married and are emotionally starved, lonely and afraid and would be very easy targets to talk **** to and grab a piece of ass from. Great advice you gave to the OP there. 

And BTW...wtf does age have to do with it? Were you once again referring to the men?

SMFH

Uuuugggghhhh!


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## Spicy

I met my husband almost instantly (within 2 weeks I'd say) on POF.

I filled out all the forms very accurately and honestly. I took the compatibility tests, all the features they offer I used, other than I didn't post a picture. You well described what you want...so say that in your comments sections on the sites. I read plenty of peoples profile who wanted to start as friends and slowly work into an exclusive relationship. For me, those are the people I was not interested in as I was most certinaly in the "wanted to get married" category. 

It's not anything wrong with your profile I'm sure, according to my husband, the online dating is just a big nightmare. Like you, he would get so frustrated meeting women that claimed they wanted a relationship, but really only wanted a free dinner and to continue playing with multiple men, (barf). He would give up, pull his profiles for a while, out of pure frustration. 

That all being said, I met a lot of nice ppl the short amount of time I was on there. And there were multiples I would have dated had I not been swept off my Flintstone feet so quickly by my sweet man. So glad I found him! I wish you the best in your search sweetheart!


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## Ynot

OLD has its benefits. While I agree that meeting some one organically, in the course of your day to day life is best, OLD allows you the opportunity to meet people you would probably never have the opportunity to meet. If you go to happy hour at one bar, you would never meet the person going to happy hour at another, the same holds true for yoga, biking, running hiking or any other activity. Having said that, just be honest and stop worrying about what someone else thinks. If you want "just friends" then say so. If you are seriously looking to get married, just say so. Although, personally I find the "seriously looking" people to be some of the most desperate people you will meet. I tend to avoid the "seriously looking" people. I myself want to dat but nothing serious. I have found that by doing so I do not set expectations. I go out, try to have fun and see where it goes - second or third date, a night of hot sex, a new friend, a relationship or even nothing more. The point is don't waste so much time worrying about it, just be honest (with yourself first and then everyone else in turn)


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## wild jade

I would just say that I don't know what I'm looking for, but I'll know when I find it. :wink2:


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## Ynot

​


wild jade said:


> I would just say that I don't know what I'm looking for, but I'll know when I find it. :wink2:


There is absolutely nothing wrong like saying it like it is.


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## bwent

I went on Plenty of Fish for all of 24 hours and almost cried. I got bombarded with messages from men but was simultaneously scared to make real connections because I'm nervous about presenting one image and then showing another (I don't catfish, I just want to be honest and don't want people to be disappointed). I know this isn't helpful, I'm just comiserating in the fact that I have never done online dating and it can be a bit intimidating!! 

What about Bumble? It's like Tinder but it puts the responsiblity entirely in the woman's hands? Google it, it seems interesting.


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## Wolf1974

I had very positive experiences with online dating. What works for some won't with others. For example of the 4 phrases you used "looking for friends first" would be the line that would prevent me from messaging you. Reason being I'm not looking for friends on OLD sites. That said some people do use this to meet and make friends so you should use whatever your most comfortable with. 

In all honesty I think most women write way too much in their profile. Dating is to get to know someone , a profile is oniy to see if we have common interest. Instead of writing about what you're looking for write about what you like and who you are. When you write what you want it is subject to interpretation that you may not want or mean.

Just my 2 cents


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## Faithful Wife

purplebubblegum said:


> After creating and deleting "Online Dating" profiles for a while now. I dont know how to say looking for a semi-serious relationship. What I mean is if I put
> 
> *Looking for Friends: Then it seems I am not in interested in a relationship
> *Short Term: Nothing serious (which leaves the DOOR wide open for cheating)
> *Long term: Looking for Marriage
> *Casual: Is sex
> 
> I am probably excepting TOO much from a stranger. Here's the deal.
> 
> *I want friends if it develops into something more then I want a one on one relationship(no seeing other ppl) but not so serious its leading to marriage. But I dont want a cheater to think friends with benefits either. If there a middle ground? Sometimes my profiles come off too relaxed about it and sometimes I feel like my profiles are to "b1tchy or bossy". So I just delete them. And start over a few months later.
> 
> I love for a relationship to develop from friends into something special. A nice flow nothing too fast but a nice pace. Sometimes it seems ppl are going long at a good pace and then the other person dives in HEAD first. Your left tryring to back peddle to the start.
> 
> Any advice?


If the site allows you to, I would check all of these:

looking for...
long term relationship
short term relationship
friends

When I read someone's profile that has these checked (and not casual sex) then I assume the person wants exactly what you said above. Friends, or more, or a lot more, if things go right.

In your description I would put something like:

"Ultimately I'd like an exclusive, committed relationship, but I'm in no rush. I like to get to know people for awhile before we talk about taking things further than just casually dating. Friendship is important to me in all relationships so it always has to start there."

If I read something like this it would be clear to me what you are looking for, especially combined with the "looking for" choices above.

You don't have to say anything about the sex, or them possibly using you, or any of that. Those issues are discussed in person only after you've met and get a feel for who they are and what they want, too.

If you end up moving toward wanting to have sex with someone, then I would have a talk with them before hand and discuss sexual exclusivity. You'd tell them that if you're going to have a sexual relationship you will have to know that neither of you are having or pursuing other sexual relationships. You might also at that time discuss both of you taking down your profiles, and discuss whether dating other people without sex is ok or not with you both (presumably not, but these are things that are best discussed, not guessed about).

What kind of responses have you gotten from the profiles you've deleted?


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## Ynot

Wolf1974 said:


> In all honesty I think most women write way too much in their profile. Dating is to get to know someone , a profile is oniy to see if we have common interest. Instead of writing about what you're looking for write about what you like and who you are. When you write what you want it is subject to interpretation that you may not want or mean.
> 
> Just my 2 cents


Sometimes they write a lot and say nothing "I am comfortable going out or staying in. I am comfortable in jeans but can really rock a little black dress..." or they say nothing at all "just ask"


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## southbound

Ynot said:


> Wolf1974 said:
> 
> 
> 
> In all honesty I think most women write way too much in their profile. Dating is to get to know someone , a profile is oniy to see if we have common interest. Instead of writing about what you're looking for write about what you like and who you are. When you write what you want it is subject to interpretation that you may not want or mean.
> 
> Just my 2 cents
> 
> 
> 
> Sometimes they write a lot and say nothing "I am comfortable going out or staying in. I am comfortable in jeans but can really rock a little black dress..." or they say nothing at all "just ask"
Click to expand...

I've noticed that most all women like kayaking, traveling, and the beach. There must be a button that automatically puts all those on their list of things they like to do.


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## Rowan

southbound said:


> I've noticed that most all women like kayaking, traveling, and the beach. There must be a button that automatically puts all those on their list of things they like to do.


I think that sort of thing is meant to signal that a woman is low maintenance enough that she enjoys going and doing stuff and being outdoors. But, yes, it does come across as the modern version of "likes poetry and long walks on the beach". 

Actually, I really _do_ like kayaking, traveling, and the beach. Well, not the beach during the day at the height of summer, but at night or during the "off season" months, when it's not eleventy-million degrees and covered in sunburned tourists. I don't think I put any of that in my profile, though. Maybe the traveling bit? I also like to cook, read, and am big on college football - which, if I recall correctly, was in my profile. Honestly, it's pretty hard to describe yourself well in a few words, and I always assumed that most men wouldn't read the profiles closely anyway so there wasn't really much point in expounding at length. 

Have good recent pictures. Don't look or sound crazy. 
It seemed to work.


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## Satya

Just want to put it out there that I had good experiences with OLD overall. Sure, I had some not so great experiences, but nothing will tell you more about a person than just meeting them for coffee and opening the lines of communication.

Constable Odo found my profile and reached out to me merely to say that he was impressed with how real it was. He wasn't fishing for a date and assumed he was way out of my profile requirements anyway, which he was. However, he would initiate the most interesting conversations of anyone I'd met and eventually we took the conversations to email (whilst I was still actively dating) and then one Friday night we met offline for a Diet Coke (Constable) and glass of wine (Satya) and talked until the restaurant had to kick us out and close up... and the rest is history.

I can definitely understand how grueling OLD seems, sure seemed that way to me at times, but it's really all in your attitude. If you approach it as something that has to cater to YOU, then it will never work because that's what everyone ELSE is thinking. In that case, I'd recommend something actively engaging, like a meetup group or book club, where people set low expectations because the premise is fun or enjoyment around.a hobby or common interest. 

I focused on dating for fun, focused on being fun, having fun, and also being engaging and HONEST about my views, opinions, feelings. Complete take it or leave it mentality with no hurt feelings on my part if my date wasn't interested. I'd just smile, shake hands, and wish them well. I'd pay for any dates I asked for. I can't remember the number of times I asked guys to please tell me their honest truth... because I could tell they wanted to turn me down but didn't know how to say it. "Just speak your truth, I won't fall apart." Man, did they look relieved when I told them I could handle truth.

I was ghosted a lot as well, and I wouldn't think twice about it or get butthurt... just move on. It's nothing personal. You can't take anything personally, it's simply not a good match for you, so don't waste your time analyzing it. Recognize if you made any mistakes and don't make them again. Recognize the issues in that other person that you don't want to see again, and improve your picker.

Odo was so impressed with my attitude, as I'd tell him about my dating adventures and ask for his advice and opinion as an older man. I was genuinely curious whether I was taking the right approach and I learned that it was the right approach for ME. I have a feeling that during these conversations, Odo was more and more convinced that he would be a much better match for a woman who had no doubts about herself whatsoever and didn't mince words. I was not always this way but once I realized that it who I was and I could be comfortable about it.... I fear almost nothing. I think that Odo realized it was the kind of woman he wanted... when other men I dated seemed to run clear from it (don't blame them... I am sure I was probably scary with my assertiveness at times). It's not a matter of having high standards when it comes to men, it's a matter of having high expectations of humans in general.

I consider myself incredibly lucky for having met Odo how and when I did. I call him my miracle. I don't attribute finding him to OLD completely, but without that medium, we would never have met.


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## southbound

Rowan said:


> I think that sort of thing is meant to signal that a woman is low maintenance enough that she enjoys going and doing stuff and being outdoors. But, yes, it does come across as the modern version of "likes poetry and long walks on the beach".


I guess it depends on the definition of high maintenance, but I consider that a bit high maintenance. I'm a homebody and am not an "activity" person, so when I read camping, kayaking, beach, it usually signals someone who has to be involved in something all the time and doesn't like just chilling out at home with free time. I'm not a hermit, I guess I'm just more like my parents and grandparents generation; give me a backyard cookout and a few friends over, and I'm good. 



Rowan said:


> and I always assumed that most men wouldn't read the profiles closely anyway so there wasn't really much point in expounding at length.


I guess I'm the oddball, because I read all the profiles. I get much more about who the person is with the profile than I do with just a picture. Before online dating, my brother used to joke that it would be nice if two people could fill out a questionnaire and get a lot of questions answered, and that day is here. For example, I don't drink at all, so if I a woman mentions drinking a lot, even if she does try to make it seem sophisticated, and half her pictures show her with a drink, I know she's probably not for me. 



Rowan said:


> Don't look or sound crazy.


I don't understand women who complain about guys being inappropriate, but they post provocative pictures. What do they think a guy is thinking when he looks at them, "Gee, I'll bet she's a good at crocheting." 

I don't understand pictures that look angry or sour. Who is that supposed to attract?


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## Elizabeth001

southbound said:


> I guess it depends on the definition of high maintenance, but I consider that a bit high maintenance. I'm a homebody and am not an "activity" person, so when I read camping, kayaking, beach, it usually signals someone who has to be involved in something all the time and doesn't like just chilling out at home with free time. I'm not a hermit, I guess I'm just more like my parents and grandparents generation; give me a backyard cookout and a few friends over, and I'm good.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I guess I'm the oddball, because I read all the profiles. I get much more about who the person is with the profile than I do with just a picture. Before online dating, my brother used to joke that it would be nice if two people could fill out a questionnaire and get a lot of questions answered, and that day is here. For example, I don't drink at all, so if I a woman mentions drinking a lot, even if she does try to make it seem sophisticated, and half her pictures show her with a drink, I know she's probably not for me.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I don't understand women who complain about guys being inappropriate, but they post provocative pictures. What do they think a guy is thinking when he looks at them, "Gee, I'll bet she's a good at crocheting."
> 
> 
> 
> I don't understand pictures that look angry or sour. Who is that supposed to attract?




Well dammit. I wanted to date you until you said I couldn't have my daily wine. Boo




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## KrisAmiss

I find OLD somewhat fascinating. I'm still married but looked at ******* (free) to see what that'd be like since I'm in limbo on divorce. I was amused how quickly I'd scroll through simply based on the picture. I don't know if I was right or wrong, but I THINK you can tell alot by that. Bathroom selfie? No. With some hot babe? No. With the kids? Maybe. And the names they called themselves... bigstallion4u. tacowhatever seemed to be popular. lawd.

you guys confirm my thoughts that the free sites are for those not all that serious. what are the best sites? (or would that be by area?) I just ran into an old friend who met her new fiance on eHarmony. AFTER 6 years dating. I'll be dead by then. She said it was awful dating in our little family oriented town.


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## Rowan

KrisAmiss said:


> I find OLD somewhat fascinating. I'm still married but looked at ******* (free) to see what that'd be like since I'm in limbo on divorce. I was amused how quickly I'd scroll through simply based on the picture. I don't know if I was right or wrong, but I THINK you can tell alot by that. Bathroom selfie? No. With some hot babe? No. With the kids? Maybe. And the names they called themselves... bigstallion4u. tacowhatever seemed to be popular. lawd.
> 
> you guys confirm my thoughts that the free sites are for those not all that serious. what are the best sites? (or would that be by area?) I just ran into an old friend who met her new fiance on eHarmony. AFTER 6 years dating. I'll be dead by then. She said it was awful dating in our little family oriented town.


I had good luck on eHarmony and on Match. Those two, at least in my area, tend to attract more of those looking for an actual relationship rather than just a hookup.

And, yes, trying to date in the small town you grew up in is a bit of a nightmare. As soon as you're divorced, every single person of the opposite sex with a pulse is beating down your door. Which might be flattering, if you didn't already know everything about them going back to grade school and exactly why they're all currently single. Way too many people appear to believe that the only relationship criteria of any importance are "legal" and "local".

:slap:


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## Wolf1974

southbound said:


> I've noticed that most all women like kayaking, traveling, and the beach. There must be a button that automatically puts all those on their list of things they like to do.


Possibly, the Colorado equivalent is hiking, biking, rafting. More likely they a putting what they think men want to hear. It's always fun to start the conversation with: "I see you like hiking, biking, rafting, When is the last time did one of those and where"..... generally then find out they went once, 3 years ago, and hated it lol.


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## southbound

Elizabeth001 said:


> southbound said:
> 
> 
> 
> I guess it depends on the definition of high maintenance, but I consider that a bit high maintenance. I'm a homebody and am not an "activity" person, so when I read camping, kayaking, beach, it usually signals someone who has to be involved in something all the time and doesn't like just chilling out at home with free time. I'm not a hermit, I guess I'm just more like my parents and grandparents generation; give me a backyard cookout and a few friends over, and I'm good.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I guess I'm the oddball, because I read all the profiles. I get much more about who the person is with the profile than I do with just a picture. Before online dating, my brother used to joke that it would be nice if two people could fill out a questionnaire and get a lot of questions answered, and that day is here. For example, I don't drink at all, so if I a woman mentions drinking a lot, even if she does try to make it seem sophisticated, and half her pictures show her with a drink, I know she's probably not for me.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I don't understand women who complain about guys being inappropriate, but they post provocative pictures. What do they think a guy is thinking when he looks at them, "Gee, I'll bet she's a good at crocheting."
> 
> 
> 
> I don't understand pictures that look angry or sour. Who is that supposed to attract?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Well dammit. I wanted to date you until you said I couldn't have my daily wine. Boo
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Click to expand...

See how it works? That little piece of information saved you from wasting and evening with me only to find out that I don't like drinking. Lol


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## southbound

Oh, I forgot one; bonfires also seem to be a big interest among the cookie cutter wnjoyments. 
When I think of a bonfire, I think of a large, controlled fire that takes a lot of wood. I can't imagine having one on a regular basis.


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## NextTimeAround

southbound said:


> Oh, I forgot one; bonfires also seem to be a big interest among the cookie cutter wnjoyments.
> When I think of a bonfire, I think of a large, controlled fire that takes a lot of wood. I can't imagine having one on a regular basis.


Do you live far outside of a city?


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## Max.HeadRoom

wild jade said:


> I would just say that I don't know what I'm looking for, but I'll know when I find it. :wink2:


my wife says is like this

I may not know what i want but i know what i do not want when i see it.

as for online dating i did it for 3 years after my my wife died in 2002; it was hit or miss. one 7 month GF that ended badly. I also looked the old fashion way too. I read 'Dating for Dummies" and "Online dating fo dummies" then "Relationships for Dummies"


I'm a big believer in being deliberate; if you aim at nothing that is what you will hit. just be smart and trust your gut.


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## SunCMars

FeministInPink said:


> I agree. I found nothing worth my time via online dating. Mostly horny men looking for easy sex. So I deleted my accounts. A month later, I met my partner the old fashioned way... at a happy hour, introduced by a friend who hoped we would click. *I wasn't necessarily interested, but he pursued me and here we are*, more than a year later.
> 
> *If we break up,* I have no plans on going back to online dating. Not worth the hassle.


I had a friend in Alaska.

He never watched TV or read newspapers, yet he always knew what was going on in the world.

He could size people up very quickly.

You see, he was an astute listener, hearing conversations all around him. He looked at everything intently, always moving his head, side to side. He usually had a subtle grin on his face. He could multi-task with his senses.

When young, I could do these things also. Difference? I was an avid reader....of everything....no matter the subject...basically a sponge. Collecting and processing useless knowledge. I was always good at crosswords puzzles.
.......................................................................................................................................
Where am I going with this? I am focusing on FIP.

I see a storm brewing. The wind is picking up, strange and delicious smells are wafting in the air. There is a sense of foreboding, dissatisfaction...and yearning for adventure. Her eyes are on the horizon, looking for the [not] familiar shadow..... A shadow that always starts out as a stick with two legs, swinging arms. The face is a blur.... trying to form, going through many renditions, presentations, none that remain.

Reference; See the bolded words above. FIP...FIP....flips men.

Moral: Better to be flipped by [one as she] then left un-handled, unseen. No compass referencing.... True North.


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## FeministInPink

SunCMars said:


> I had a friend in Alaska.
> 
> He never watched TV or read newspapers, yet he always knew what was going on in the world.
> 
> He could size people up very quickly.
> 
> You see, he was an astute listener, hearing conversations all around him. He looked at everything intently, always moving his head, side to side. He usually had a subtle grin on his face. He could multi-task with his senses.
> 
> When young, I could do these things also. Difference? I was an avid reader....of everything....no matter the subject...basically a sponge. Collecting and processing useless knowledge. I was always good at crosswords puzzles.
> .......................................................................................................................................
> Where am I going with this? I am focusing on FIP.
> 
> I see a storm brewing. The wind is picking up, strange and delicious smells are wafting in the air. There is a sense of foreboding, dissatisfaction...and yearning for adventure. Her eyes are on the horizon, looking for the [not] familiar shadow..... A shadow that always starts out as a stick with two legs, swinging arms. The face is a blur.... trying to form, going through many renditions, presentations, none that remain.
> 
> Reference; See the bolded words above. FIP...FIP....flips men.
> 
> Moral: Better to be flipped by [one as she] then left un-handled, unseen. No compass referencing.... True North.


 @SunCMars I'm not sure what you're getting at.

I meant I wasn't interested the first time I met him. I am slow to warm to people. But then he took me out for brunch a few days later, and by the end of brunch I was very intrigued.

The only thing I mean by "If we break up..." is that we never know what the future holds.

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk


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## SunCMars

FeministInPink said:


> @SunCMars I'm not sure what you're getting at.
> 
> I meant I wasn't interested the first time I met him. I am slow to warm to people. But then he took me out for brunch a few days later, and by the end of brunch I was very intrigued.
> 
> The only thing I mean by "If we break up..." is that we never know what the future holds.
> 
> Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk


Or course...

Nevertheless...maybe the more..

Fate runs it's course....
.........................................................................................................
When that face materializes, and it may, your face will heat to a blush..

And the 'slow warming' will be you-slurped with a flushed rush....
.........................................................................................................

And if this face remains hidden....nothing lost....
But more importantly, nothing gained...

Ships passed in the night with nary a toot. Nary a kiss or a hug. :wink2:


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## southbound

NextTimeAround said:


> southbound said:
> 
> 
> 
> Oh, I forgot one; bonfires also seem to be a big interest among the cookie cutter wnjoyments.
> When I think of a bonfire, I think of a large, controlled fire that takes a lot of wood. I can't imagine having one on a regular basis.
> 
> 
> 
> Do you live far outside of a city?
Click to expand...


Yes, I live about about as far outside of a city as one could get.


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## ZedZ

Any opinions on Ourtime site?


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## MovingForward

Spicy said:


> I met my husband almost instantly (within 2 weeks I'd say) on POF.
> 
> I read plenty of peoples profile who wanted to start as friends and slowly work into an exclusive relationship. For me, those are the people I was not interested in as I was most certinaly in the "wanted to get married" category.


 @Spicy This is exactly what I put in my online dating profile LOL except the exclusive relationship part..... The reason was simply because that is how all past relationships have started for me, start as friends and progress, It does not mean I am looking for an easy hookup it just means I was not going into every date deciding if I want to marry the person, I want to feel a connection build a bond and then decide.


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## Chuck71

OLD is a complete game of chance. Too many people portray themselves as something they are

not. I went into detail about what I saw in OLD on Decimated's "Needle in a Haystack" thread

in LaD about 18 months ago. Also I did a Top 10 Sheety Dates of 2015 on my Crossroads II thread

on the last page. Strange people out there.


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## MovingForward

Chuck71 said:


> OLD is a complete game of chance. Too many people portray themselves as something they are
> 
> not. I went into detail about what I saw in OLD on Decimated's "Needle in a Haystack" thread
> 
> in LaD about 18 months ago. Also I did a Top 10 Sheety Dates of 2015 on my Crossroads II thread
> 
> on the last page. Strange people out there.


Yeah its weird for sure and speaking with girls on there they literally get bombarded with guys looking to meet them so its highly competitive and seems very unnatural.


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## JRegan

I was initially very apprehensive about dating again, but I actually enjoyed the online dating process.


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