# Wife Left Me



## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

Hey Guys,

Just found this forum, A little about myself I am 24 Years old about to be 25 in 2 days! My wife (23) and myself have been married for 2.5 years and She is currently here from morocco on a visa and got her permanent residency. This was for 2 years is about to expire in 3 months. She had left me on new years eve to move in to a her friends (girl) house, Which I don't know where it is. She told me she hates the states and doesn't want to live here, and I strongly believe that and doesn't want a green card. I don't think she is having a affair either.

I haven't talked to her for about 2 weeks now and I just sent a message because her birthday is tomorrow, and called her too. No Answer.

I did try the begging to get her back when I saw her within the first week. I have been talked to her mom and she wants us to be together and she told me she didn't talk to a lawyer or anything. I don't know what to do next. I even called some psychics and they told me she is confused, which her mom said too, and she will come back because she is young. 

I don't know what to do now, Should I talk to a lawyer or wait it out.... my parents are very upset about this too and its causing me a lot of stress.

Thanks,
m


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## toonaive (Dec 13, 2012)

Well, I know you are hurting inside. Stop trying to change her mind by begging. It wont work. Take the high road, prepare yourself the best you can for a divorce. See an attorney to work on starting the process. By having her served, you might be able to turn her head back and see the error or her ways. On the flip side, you are only 25. You have plenty of life, and experiences ahead of you. Work on yourself, and look forward to a better future, with someone who is a better partner for you. Would you rather she do this 20 years or more down the road?


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

toonaive said:


> Well, I know you are hurting inside. Stop trying to change her mind by begging. It wont work. Take the high road, prepare yourself the best you can for a divorce. See an attorney to work on starting the process. By having her served, you might be able to turn her head back and see the error or her ways. On the flip side, you are only 25. You have plenty of life, and experiences ahead of you. Work on yourself, and look forward to a better future, with someone who is a better partner for you. Would you rather she do this 20 years or more down the road?


Thank you for your quick response. That's true. I agree with you there. I get mixed feeling from her and her mom, Her mom says just wait for her and she will come to you. I guess I was a bad husband to her and I keep reading about this 180 approach, Can anyone link me on that process?

Thanks,
m


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## SamuraiJack (May 30, 2014)

Study up on "The 180" and make plans to live your life without her.

Sorry you are here.


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

SamuraiJack said:


> Study up on "The 180" and make plans to live your life without her.
> 
> Sorry you are here.


I tried the no contact approach and it worked with my ex-gf when we were together for 4 years and she came back in 3 months. I hope this is quicker.

-m


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## Sammy64 (Oct 28, 2013)

speed808ix said:


> I tried the no contact approach and it worked with my ex-gf when we were together for 4 years and she came back in 3 months. I hope this is quicker.
> 
> -m


How well did it work if she is your Ex GF ?


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## GTdad (Aug 15, 2011)

speed808ix said:


> She told me she hates the states and doesn't want to live here, and I strongly believe that and doesn't want a green card. I don't think she is having a affair either.


One reason we may have to doubt that is the fact she left to live with a friend and didn't hop on a plane back to Casablanca or Rabat or wherever.

What was the marriage before the separation? Any signs that things weren't quite right?


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

GTdad said:


> One reason we may have to doubt that is the fact she left to live with a friend and didn't hop on a plane back to Casablanca or Rabat or wherever.
> 
> What was the marriage before the separation? Any signs that things weren't quite right?


I mean the reasons are so small, you will laugh but....

most of our fights are so small like, cleaning the house, Laundry and cooking food and stuff like that. Nothing big, Its what you think kids would fight about and that's what we fought about. She packed up her stuff a day before and we had a heated argument and I said why don't you leave then and that's what she did when I was working. 

She didn't go back to morocco because she is in school till the summer, so I don't know what she is doing if she was so sure about divorcing me she would off. 

She is kind of weird she doesn't use a real facebook page, she has a different one without her pictures and information only Moroccan friends that she never met and she keeps talking to them and blogging. I recently found out she re-activated her real fb page and I just recently bought my dream car and I am sure she was spying but nothing yet.

-m


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

If she hasn't answered you and continues to NOT respond to you, then she is done, dear. And all you can do is concede and move on. 

Marriage is a two-way street.

Also, the way she left you and refuses to answer you is really childish, barring abuse on your part.


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

Fyi, never tell someone to leave or divorce you if you don't mean it. It's a form of control aimed at shutting someone up, and your bluff might be called. Yours was.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

Sammy64 said:


> How well did it work if she is your Ex GF ?


She actually came back and she wanted me back and I choose to be with my girlfriend which turned out to be my wife



Jellybeans said:


> If she hasn't answered you and continues to NOT respond to you, then she is done, dear. And all you can do is concede and move on.
> 
> Marriage is a two-way street.
> 
> Also, the way she left you and refuses to answer you is really childish, barring abuse on your part.


She answers me what I meant was in the 2 week period of no contact she hasn't reached out to me..... I texted her today but even her mom didn't get through.



lifeistooshort said:


> Fyi, never tell someone to leave or divorce you if you don't mean it. It's a form of control aimed at shutting someone up, and your bluff might be called. Yours was.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Well she always told me I would leave I would leave jokingly but I guess she did 

This waiting game sucks I will see what she will do on my birthday and if anything I will start the proceedings if I don't hear from her. 

We are young and stupid.....


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

speed808ix said:


> She answers me what I meant was in the 2 week period of no contact she hasn't reached out to me..... I texted her today but even her mom didn't get through.


Even her mother cannot get in touch with her? How do you know that she is somewhere that she is safe?

I would send her an email, text and any other form of communication that you can telling her that if she did not respond to either her or her mother in a few hours that you are going to file a missing person report.


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

EleGirl said:


> Even her mother cannot get in touch with her? How do you know that she is somewhere that she is safe?
> 
> I would send her an email, text and any other form of communication that you can telling her that if she did not respond to either her or her mother in a few hours that you are going to file a missing person report.


I just got a update guys,

She just messaged me when I messaged her earlier today saying "hey birthday girl wanted to see if i can see you today or tomorrow night for your birthday."

She sent" No Were Seperated Remember Ok"

Like that? She responds after a long time she works at the airport. Her mom talks to every day...

Thanks,
m


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## SamuraiJack (May 30, 2014)

Dude,
She is done.

Go dark and start the proceedings.
Try to at least save your dignity.


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## VFW (Oct 24, 2012)

Firstly you two are not stupid, you are young and inexperienced, there is a difference. Secondly, she is extremely upset and not without some cause. When you issue ultimatum's, you have to realize that you are taking a chance them will accept your offer. There are better ways to handle the situation as this method was not productive. 

There is no rush here, time is on your side. You need to go dark, no calls, emails, drunk dialing, nothing. Additionally, don't call her mother, friends or families. It would not hurt to consult with an attorney, but would not file yet. After at least 30 days I would have another conversation with her, in person if possible (dinner maybe). This would be to discuss the way forward, whatever that may be. Don't discuss details in the text to arrange a meeting, that needs to be done in person. The meeting needs to be frank and honest.

Your wife is a young woman in a foreign country and culture. Marriage was not the way they are described in Harlequin Romance novels and she is disillusioned. She airs her grievances to you and you tell her if she does not like it, get out. Wives are not our mothers nor our maids and need to be treated with respect, as an equal. Now I am sure she has her faults, but you need to accept your shortcoming and look to improve them, either in this relationship or the next.


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

SamuraiJack said:


> Dude,
> She is done.
> 
> Go dark and start the proceedings.
> Try to at least save your dignity.



I'm going dark. No Contact Part 2 



VFW said:


> Firstly you two are not stupid, you are young and inexperienced, there is a difference. Secondly, she is extremely upset and not without some cause. When you issue ultimatum's, you have to realize that you are taking a chance them will accept your offer. There are better ways to handle the situation as this method was not productive.
> 
> There is no rush here, time is on your side. You need to go dark, no calls, emails, drunk dialing, nothing. Additionally, don't call her mother, friends or families. It would not hurt to consult with an attorney, but would not file yet. After at least 30 days I would have another conversation with her, in person if possible (dinner maybe). This would be to discuss the way forward, whatever that may be. Don't discuss details in the text to arrange a meeting, that needs to be done in person. The meeting needs to be frank and honest.
> 
> Your wife is a young woman in a foreign country and culture. Marriage was not the way they are described in Harlequin Romance novels and she is disillusioned. She airs her grievances to you and you tell her if she does not like it, get out. Wives are not our mothers nor our maids and need to be treated with respect, as an equal. Now I am sure she has her faults, but you need to accept your shortcoming and look to improve them, either in this relationship or the next.


:iagree: I guess I am going dark. I did this for 2 weeks and she opened her real facebook to check back in with me. I will talk to a attorney on Monday to see my options and I don't think I will file for the next 60-90 days. Do you guys think that is a fair time frame or I should file and just not wait?

Thanks,
M


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

Why would you wait? You can always delay or withdraw, but there's no reason your life should be on hold.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

does anyone know how the process takes for D?

I am in illinois.


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## soccermom2three (Jan 4, 2013)

speed808ix said:


> I just got a update guys,


That was convenient timing.


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

soccermom2three said:


> That was convenient timing.


I mean I did say I texted her in the morning for her birthday
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## FormerSelf (Apr 21, 2013)

Find out from her mom where she works specifically, so lawyer can serve her with divorce papers. She may try to stretch out separation in order to suit her visa status, so I would let lawyer know entire situation, so he/she knows what you are all working with.

I wouldn't hold your breathe for a reconciliation.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

Start the divorce now...it will take a few months to go through.

The sooner you have her served the better.

For what it's worth you can always withdraw the filing before it's finalized in the next few months, but at least you have the ball rolling.

Hell it might take a few weeks just to find a lawyer you like and then another few weeks to get the retainer together....then figure a few more weeks just to have her served.

So in short you could be looking at a good month , month in a half just to have her served.

Getting a divorce is like going to the DMV, you will be doing a lot of waiting, so you better get in line now!


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

How were you a bad husband, other than criticizing her?


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

turnera said:


> How were you a bad husband, other than criticizing her?


That's about it criticizing her. She complained about money but what couple doesn't complain about that. Our house is paid off. We only have 2 cars bills at about 1100$ a month and I made about 100k last year. She works part time 30hours a week making 9 a hour. I bought her a new Acura TLX in october and she left that and took her own car which was paid off and is a junker. Now I am stuck with the lease and the car never gets driven.

She compares other people when we fight like her sister in Paris getting Boat Loads of money for shopping and I think about future and don't want to spend 500-750$ for her outfits.....


:scratchhead::scratchhead: I found out today through her mail that her personal bank account over drafted 4 times since she has been gone? Should I go put some money in there or what?!!! I don't want her to starve and her parents 3 weeks ago told me what she did is completely wrong and don't want to support her..... 
I'm Stuck at work confused as $h*T!

P.S she took her name off the joint account as soon as she took off.

Thanks,
M


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

You're in no hurry. Don't put money in there. Live life, see what happens.


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

She has 6$ in her bank account.... I don't know what to do...


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

She can come to you if she needs help. She's the one who walked away. I know it's hard, but you can't be her White Knight.


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

turnera said:


> She can come to you if she needs help. She's the one who walked away. I know it's hard, but you can't be her White Knight.


That's true... I am going to talk to the lawyer at 5pm cst today... I guess now I am accepting that is over.... She didn't even text me or anything on my birthday...:scratchhead:

-m


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Once women decide to leave, they are VERY wary of doing any single thing, no matter how small, that would lead the man to think he still has a chance. Don't know why, that's just how women are.


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## VFW (Oct 24, 2012)

speed808ix said:


> She has 6$ in her bank account.... I don't know what to do...


Dude put your knight in shining armor outfit away, it will not serve you well. Let her worry about herself and you worry about you. I recommend exercise to help with stress and make a healthier you. Get back into a hobby you have ignored or start one you have always wanted to try. Take a cooking class, get a new outfit, cut your hair different, something out of the ordinary. Volunteer work is also good for helping others and getting you away from your troubles. Read a classic novel, etc.....get so busy living your life that you don't have time for her.


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

turnera said:


> Once women decide to leave, they are VERY wary of doing any single thing, no matter how small, that would lead the man to think he still has a chance. Don't know why, that's just how women are.


I don't know women that well I guess.... LOL



VFW said:


> Dude put your knight in shining armor outfit away, it will not serve you well. Let her worry about herself and you worry about you. I recommend exercise to help with stress and make a healthier you. Get back into a hobby you have ignored or start one you have always wanted to try. Take a cooking class, get a new outfit, cut your hair different, something out of the ordinary. Volunteer work is also good for helping others and getting you away from your troubles. Read a classic novel, etc.....get so busy living your life that you don't have time for her.


I have been working alot more, I don't spend days thinking about her, That's the way I am but I get worried if she isn't safe that's all. 3 days since no contact and I am living life. It was great going out with all my friends who don't know whats happening in my life. A lot of girls approached me on my birthday and it felt awesome to be wanted!! :rofl:


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## SamuraiJack (May 30, 2014)

Dude,
You are making good money, have your house paid off and your wife just left you….File those papers, call up the dealership and explain the situation to them. They will sometimes do a lease buyout on special circumstances. Severe change of life may be just the thing. 

She doesn’t feel entitled to any of your stuff…which is a first in my book.

I’m NOT saying go out and get laid, but I am saying get together with some friends and new people and have a good time. Don’t put any pressure on yourself except to not drive while impaired and to maintain your job. Work more if you want, but now is the time to get into a new hobby. 
Anything really. 
I have a friend who builds EXTREMELY detailed models…taught himself from scratch.

I’m looking at building a professional grade woodworking bench and returning to my old hobby.
My daughter caught me looking at a YouTube vid about it and asked if I was going to build a bench. I told her that in the past my wife wasn’t too excited for me to do that. She just looked at me and said “Well she’s gone now so do whatever you want.”

Point is that you are free for now.
Use this time to work on YOU.

I personally encourage therapy for your loss and to make yourself a better person.
Investing in yourself in yourself is one deposit that ALWAYS pays off.


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

just got a update today...

I was minding my business and I had already talked to a lawyer to get the process going...
I received a text from the wife saying Hi How are you and then 3 minutes later she said that I will receive mail. (First time I talked to her in 2 weeks)

I responded saying sounds good and asked which address she sent it to and went to take a nap and in the middle of my nap I heard knocking on the door and ignored it (LOL). She responded saying she was sending it to the house I was at. So I said I was sleeping and she asked me when I will be there again in the morning? I knew it wasn't her at the door for sure.

Does this mean I am getting Served? Damn she beat me to it I Guess!


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

Now she texted me that I can pick it up and will send me a address?

Guess I am getting Served.


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Looks that way.


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

turnera said:


> Looks that way.


On the way to pick it up..


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## Orange_Pekoe (Jan 5, 2015)

This is very suspenseful!


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

Something is Very Weird Here... I go to her lawyers office and is somewhat of a joke, Horrible place to be a lawyer and it says everywhere immigration lawyer.. I got the paperwork and its basically a quick divorce paper, Everyone keeps all there assets she doesn't want support nothing just a divorce...

So I do think Reconciliation is out the window but its wierd she filled as soon as she got her green card. The lawyer said you want to sign now or what? I was like No way Ill have my attorney contact you...

So do you think she used me for the green card?

Weird Situation But yes I did get served and I am kinda happy she did it instead of me lol

-m


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## GTdad (Aug 15, 2011)

I'm sorry man, but it sure does sound like you got used for a green card.

Let your attorney review the paperwork, but it sounds like a deal worth taking.


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## Blondilocks (Jul 4, 2013)

Note: In the future never drive to get served. What were you thinking? Let them do the leg work.

Yes, it looks like you were used. Can you talk to immigration?


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

GTdad said:


> I'm sorry man, but it sure does sound like you got used for a green card.
> 
> Let your attorney review the paperwork, but it sounds like a deal worth taking.


Yup exactly 2 years and 2 months into it... Looks like I had my lawyer review it and he said something fishy is going on.. He will look into and have a meeting with me tomorrow.


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

speed808ix said:


> it's weird she filed as soon as she got her green card.


:rofl:

Only to YOU!

Sorry, that was mean.


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## poida (Jan 17, 2014)

speed808ix said:


> Yup exactly 2 years and 2 months into it... Looks like I had my lawyer review it and he said something fishy is going on.. He will look into and have a meeting with me tomorrow.


You know what..... take the positives from this.

At least like many people here;
- You weren't cheated on,
- It was only 2 years,
- You are still young,
- She doesn't want your money (celebrate dude!!!)
- You make good money,
- She has left you clean cut, there is no confusion in her mind that she has left you so you can also move on knowing it is DEFINITELY totally over.

That's a lot of positives in a sh*tty situation. keep reminding yourself of those things and enjoy the rest of your life. Good luck.


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## VFW (Oct 24, 2012)

speed808ix said:


> So I do think Reconciliation is out the window but its wierd she filled as soon as she got her green card. The lawyer said you want to sign now or what? I was like No way Ill have my attorney contact you...
> 
> So do you think she used me for the green card?
> 
> ...


This is not that uncommon, but don't sweat the petty things. Let your attorney deal with the legal issues and you take care of you. I recommend taking inventory of the relationship of the things that you could have done better and apply to a more deserving partner. We all live and learn my friend.


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## SamuraiJack (May 30, 2014)

speed808ix said:


> Yup exactly 2 years and 2 months into it... Looks like I had my lawyer review it and he said something fishy is going on.. He will look into and have a meeting with me tomorrow.


I think her letting you keep all your assets is her way of saying "I wont make a fuss if you wont".

My current work is in immigration and this is a very common scene for us.
Take. the. Deal.


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

poida said:


> You know what..... take the positives from this.
> 
> At least like many people here;
> - You weren't cheated on,
> ...


At least I hope I was not cheated on, I did see on her phone talking to a lot of guys but its the past now...

Since I am young about when I got on this website. I joined another Dating Website same time, and a couple girls found me and started talking. I don't want to rush into anything But I was very honest about my situation and they basically don't care.

In my religion I really can't have a girlfriend but have in the past and these girls are actually very mature, So what is a good time period I should not rush into anything?

Thanks,
M


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## tulsy (Nov 30, 2012)

speed808ix said:


> ...
> In my religion I really can't have a girlfriend but have in the past and these girls are actually very mature, So what is a good time period I should not rush into anything?
> 
> Thanks,
> M


Since religion is a factor for you, you should discuss that question with your cleryman (ie: priest, imam, minister, etc.). I'm only saying that because you brought up that you aren't supposed to date.

IMO, you should concentrate on yourself for a while, without getting involved with anyone. Hit the gym and focus on your health. You still have the legal issue of divorce to deal with, so don't complicate things right now. Also, you aren't supposed to date, so if you take your religion seriously, you shouldn't date. 

What's the alternative, secretly dating to pretend you are religious? That would be pretty fake, no? I'm not judging you, I'm just asking you to judge the situation yourself. If you are religious and it is important to you, then do not compromise what you believe because it will weigh heavy on your conscience later in life.

Implement the 180, and good luck buddy.


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

tulsy said:


> Since religion is a factor for you, you should discuss that question with your cleryman (ie: priest, imam, minister, etc.). I'm only saying that because you brought up that you aren't supposed to date.
> 
> IMO, you should concentrate on yourself for a while, without getting involved with anyone. Hit the gym and focus on your health. You still have the legal issue of divorce to deal with, so don't complicate things right now. Also, you aren't supposed to date, so if you take your religion seriously, you shouldn't date.
> 
> ...



My lawyer said When I sign the paperwork it should take 10 Days to finalize the situation, very Quick process... :smthumbup:


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

I think I am going to go into civil litigation because she said on the paperwork that I was mentally cruel to her... I wanted to know if it is legal to offer 2 outs so I can sign the papers right away without court

Money for Putting me through this ( Visa Paper work, Wedding, etc)
or 
Forfeit the Green card?

Is this possible.

-m


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## LongWalk (Apr 4, 2013)

How much did it all cost?

You will soon spend as much on lawyers. She did not take the car you bought her. That is the only big ticket item. Just make sure you can get rid of one car and keep the proceeds for yourself.

Was she ever loving and affectionate?


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

LongWalk said:


> How much did it all cost?
> 
> You will soon spend as much on lawyers. She did not take the car you bought her. That is the only big ticket item. Just make sure you can get rid of one car and keep the proceeds for yourself.
> 
> Was she ever loving and affectionate?


Little bit at the start of the marriage..... Nothing at all for the last year... She didn't take anything no car nothing. No future maintenance.

My lawyer isn't charging that much since my dad owns a limousine company is good friends with him and his family.

-m


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## Jane139 (Jan 6, 2015)

Just be glad it will soon be over. If she married you just fir the green card...oh well. You are very lucky that is all she wants and that it can be over soon and you can carry on with your life.


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

Jane139 said:


> Just be glad it will soon be over. If she married you just fir the green card...oh well. You are very lucky that is all she wants and that it can be over soon and you can carry on with your life.


That's true. I believe she has another guy waiting for her that wasn't legal in the first place so basically I was used  that blows 

on the positive note, The other girl I been talking to likes me a lot , I really don't want a rebound .. ADVICE?!


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## Jharm (Oct 20, 2014)

My wife left me in November, I was devastated. Begged, cried, pleaded... Basically looked like a pathetic fool. I finally picked myself up off of the floor (500 drunk texts later) and started the 180. I moved on and was happy again.... bam she started texting me she misses me blah blah blah....


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## Decorum (Sep 7, 2012)

speed808ix said:


> That's true. I believe she has another guy waiting for her that wasn't legal in the first place so basically I was used  that blows
> 
> on the positive note, The other girl I been talking to likes me a lot , I really don't want a rebound .. ADVICE?!


You are a speedy one.

You cant have a girlfriend because of your religion (what ever that could be) but your on a dating sight.

You dont want a rebound, but this girl really likes you and your all excited.

She isnt cheating but she now has an illegal boyfriend on the side.

She is giving you a deal you should take and you want to go to court.

Not to mention that you married a young woman from another country who was just using you.

This all seems a little squirrelly don't you think?

Have you considered counselling?


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

Decorum said:


> You are a speedy one.
> 
> You cant have a girlfriend because of your religion (what ever that could be) but your on a dating sight.
> 
> ...


I should go to counselling after I read this


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## Sammy64 (Oct 28, 2013)

speed808ix said:


> I should go to counselling after I read this


:iagree::iagree:


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

UPDATE ALERT:

So the only people that know about this is my boss and my parents, So we were talking and he wanted to see if the petition was filed through the court system. We went online and nothing... We looked under last name nothing.... We look at date of filling and there were hundreds... not us though.

I call my lawyer and he is like what is going on!!! he was shocked. He then requested I text my X and find out what is happening and figure out if she even wants this or was this a big bluff. I proceeded to text her to see if we can meet, She said we can talk on the phone and told me to call her at 9pm.

I called her at 9pm and I basically said how are you and stuff like that and wanted to talk about what she filed. I asked her its been only 2 months and she said she just got the paperwork done and told her lawyer to sit on it and the copies I received were the only copies that her 2-bit hack attorney had? (Basically I think it was a bluff) She was telling me stuff like people get divorced all the time and then remarried, and that we will still talk after... I told her why don't we remain separated until summer and then make a decision, I told her I miss her and want her back and want to go to counseling together.... She said she will think about it and I told her also that I would give her space as well....

She proceeded to tell me that her roommate has taped her crying in her sleep and she's been emotional lately... She did say about 6 Minutes into the call that she would put the divorce papers on hold and that was just me asking once?

What does this mean, Has anyone encountered this before? What if I signed the paperwork I would of failed the test....

-m


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

She is banging some other guy and if it doesn't work out she is looking at you as her plan B.

There is a good chance this all works out...there is even a better chance that it happens again. From were I'm sitting you can be replaced, it's just a matter of time before she finds a new plan A.

For that matter her current boyfriend *could* in fact work out and now you are just in limbo waiting for the shoe to drop.


In short this new relationship might not work out so she is keeping you around cuz she knows you will take her back after the current boy friend is done phucking her!


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## Suspecting2014 (Jun 11, 2014)

Easy, you arare a better provider and she is realizing it now

Ifshe banged an other guy, would you take her back?


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## LongWalk (Apr 4, 2013)

What's her roommate's name? How do you know it's a woman?

She is absolutely a dishonest, unreliable spouse. You should file for divorce and stop begging to get her back.

How many times has she cried in the arms of OM who bangs her but doesn't love her?


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

I don't care if you suspend the divorce, but for God's sake, DO NOT INITIATE.

If she doesn't come after YOU, you are her Plan B.


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

the guy said:


> She is banging some other guy and if it doesn't work out she is looking at you as her plan B.
> 
> There is a good chance this all works out...there is even a better chance that it happens again. From were I'm sitting you can be replaced, it's just a matter of time before she finds a new plan A.
> 
> ...


I agree to this that's why I again asked for advice... My lawyer said its up to me what to do....She is more religious person than me and she can't have Pre-Martial relations... She does wear a head scarf and very close to her religion



Suspecting2014 said:


> Easy, you arare a better provider and she is realizing it now
> 
> Ifshe banged an other guy, would you take her back?


No Way I wouldn't take her back.... She is more religious person than me and she can't have Pre-Martial relations ...She does wear a head scarf and very close to her religion



LongWalk said:


> What's her roommate's name? How do you know it's a woman?
> 
> She is absolutely a dishonest, unreliable spouse. You should file for divorce and stop begging to get her back.
> 
> How many times has she cried in the arms of OM who bangs her but doesn't love her?


Her roommates name start with a S and I checked Facebook and it is in fact a women



turnera said:


> I don't care if you suspend the divorce, but for God's sake, DO NOT INITIATE.
> 
> If she doesn't come after YOU, you are her Plan B.


That's true.. So you guys are saying I should ACCEPT It and JUST PUSH IT THROUGH?

BTW her mom is now in america and living with her for the time being... They live in a studio apartment 1 bath 700 SQ FT with 3 people.... I doubt she will "Bang" any other guy because her mom would kill her and again, they are very religious....


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## SamuraiJack (May 30, 2014)

speed808ix said:


> UPDATE ALERT:
> 
> So the only people that know about this is my boss and my parents, So we were talking and he wanted to see if the petition was filed through the court system. We went online and nothing... We looked under last name nothing.... We look at date of filling and there were hundreds... not us though.
> 
> ...


Is that cake I smell?
Is that cake eating I hear?










You are getting snowed by her. File the papers yourself and assume a position of power. Call her bluff.
Remember you can always stop if she is truly wanting reconciliation.


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

SamuraiJack said:


> Is that cake I smell?
> Is that cake eating I hear?
> 
> You are getting snowed by her. File the papers yourself and assume a position of power. Call her bluff.
> Remember you can always stop if she is truly wanting reconciliation.


Thanks Jack.. 

I believe I have to get back in the Pilot's seat instead of a co-pilot!


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

speed808ix said:


> That's true.. So you guys are saying I should ACCEPT It and JUST PUSH IT THROUGH?..


I'm saying you should DIVORCE her and move on with your life.


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## helolover (Aug 24, 2012)

I think you got scammed for a green card.

It's called marriage fraud. I recommend you initiate an investigation.

http://www.ice.gov/identity-benefit-fraud


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

Another UPDATE ALERT:
She texted me on Saturday saying she wants me to sign her 'unfiled' paperwork and get it back to the lawyer, She wants a divorce and maybe after she is done with school (2 years) she will try again. She agreed to meeting me on Sunday... Come Sunday, She cancelled saying she is busy... 

This is just laughable how I am such a sucker.. Called the lawyer today and said **** her paperwork and Let's do our own, My dad's friend is a immigration lawyer and we are suing her for damages caused by this or she can Forfeit her green card and go HOME! My lawyer already filed for benefit fraud.

Can't wait till it's over!

-m


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## SamuraiJack (May 30, 2014)

speed808ix said:


> Another UPDATE ALERT:
> She texted me on Saturday saying she wants me to sign her 'unfiled' paperwork and get it back to the lawyer, She wants a divorce and maybe after she is done with school (2 years) she will try again. She agreed to meeting me on Sunday... Come Sunday, She cancelled saying she is busy...
> 
> This is just laughable how I am such a sucker.. Called the lawyer today and said **** her paperwork and Let's do our own, My dad's friend is a immigration lawyer and we are suing her for damages caused by this or she can Forfeit her green card and go HOME! My lawyer already filed for benefit fraud.
> ...


I bet you feel a LOT better at this point.
Situation all makes sense now...


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

SamuraiJack said:


> I bet you feel a LOT better at this point.
> Situation all makes sense now...


Not really unless you tell me what this means.


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

Little Update for you guys..

I signed the divorce papers and gave them to her and I thought she gave them to the lawyer and we didn't have contact, I did hire a P.I and see if everything she is saying is true and it actually was no boyfriend just going to work and living with her friend (woman).

Now she hits me with 2 weeks ago that she doesn't want a divorce and she wants to go out on dates with me to see if she wants me back...

I am a very impatient person... What to do... what to do... so many questions....

Thanks,
m


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## Nucking Futs (Apr 8, 2013)

speed808ix said:


> Little Update for you guys..
> 
> I signed the divorce papers and gave them to her and I thought she gave them to the lawyer and we didn't have contact, I did hire a P.I and see if everything she is saying is true and it actually was no boyfriend just going to work and living with her friend (woman).
> 
> ...


Kick her to the curb and move on. Three and a half billion women on this planet, no need to stick with this one.


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## speed808ix (Feb 5, 2015)

Nucking Futs said:


> Kick her to the curb and move on. Three and a half billion women on this planet, no need to stick with this one.


I honestly want to give it a shot, is it a bad idea for the future?


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Keep the divorce moving forward. You can see during the process if she actually works to win you back. And if not, you're that much closer to being free.


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## Decorum (Sep 7, 2012)

turnera said:


> Keep the divorce moving forward. You can see during the process if she actually works to win you back. And if not, you're that much closer to being free.


:iagree: But finalize the divorce, she is to immature to be trusted.

Later if she matures you can date again.


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## SamuraiJack (May 30, 2014)

speed808ix said:


> I honestly want to give it a shot, is it a bad idea for the future?


One word....Prenup.


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