# 2 steps forward, 1 step back...



## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

I've been trying to move on from my wife, been branching out trying to see our options and so has she, then we end up back together talking about it. Then we start talking about us... then either I'm too stubborn or she's too proud, and we go again.

But now I'm starting to understand the effect of the dramas I play on her, and what she has put up with, with strength and commitment... and I guess I needed this experience to appreciate her as well, now I'm committed to make it work.

I don't want to start fights with her anymore, or to be a drama king and attempt to damage our relationship. Guess I've changed, and learnt. She doesn't want to be a doormat either I know so I'm making the first move and giving up my pride...

I just hope she can forgive me for everything...


----------



## daisygirl 41 (Aug 5, 2011)

Forgiveness takes time. Don't rush her. But if you do all that you need to do then surely Forgivness will come.
Good luck to you
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## DawnD (Sep 23, 2009)

Consistent actions make it easier to forgive someone.


----------



## bellamaxjoy (Oct 27, 2011)

Wow rd, you sound like you have grown up. Keep it up, games are for children, and always remember that you and your wife are what your daughteer will look at as an example of marriage. I'm pulling for you.


----------



## deejov (Sep 24, 2011)

It's nice to hear from you. 
Consider forgiving yourself, too. What's done is done and tomorrow is a new chance. Working on yourself is one the hardest things in life to do, IMO. Wow, good for you and your family!


----------



## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Yeah, we needed that space real bad I guess... realised instead of dishing out dramas I should be protecting her from them as a man. Only the fun games for us now, no more heartbreaks...


----------



## dymo (Jan 2, 2012)

Congratulations, but...

My concern is that you feel like this now, but a month or two down the road that urge to push her away will start building again. 

I hope I'm wrong, but I'm not sure I am. I think that there is something deep inside you that you need to start tackling now, before that instinct kicks back in.


----------



## DawnD (Sep 23, 2009)

Make sure you both agree on what the "fun games" are LOL


----------



## LovesHerMan (Jul 28, 2011)

Good for you, RD. I thought your marriage was done. You have the right attitude. Keep it up, because you will be tested.


----------



## Hopefull363 (Feb 13, 2012)

Good for you RD. You learned the same thing I had to a couple of months ago. Pride really has no place in the marriage. I had to give up my pride to stop the cycle. I now own my part of the problems and I'm trying to make it right. I feel a sense of relieve after giving up my pride for our marriage and things have gotten a lot better. I hope you have the same results.

Remember it takes two to work on the marriage. So, I hope she's willing to own and work on her part of the problem as well.

Good Luck to both of you. Look forward to hearing about your progress.


----------



## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

Without some intensive counseling for both of you, you'll just stay on the same hamster wheel.

From your description, I can tell you're not doing that.

It's a must.


----------



## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Things are going well so far... we've been spending a lot of time together lately


----------



## 2nd_t!me iz_best (Feb 28, 2011)

daisygirl 41 said:


> Forgiveness takes time. Don't rush her. But if you do all that you need to do then surely Forgivness will come.
> Good luck to you
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


hmmm, not always


----------



## bellamaxjoy (Oct 27, 2011)

glad to hear. When we start being concerned for the other person more than ourselves, then we can truly say we are loving them. I am really happy you are doing better, I always think of your dear daughter, and this is the best thing for you all!


----------



## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

RandomDude said:


> Things are going well so far... we've been spending a lot of time together lately


I hear the other shoe rustling in the closet.


----------



## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

We're re-dating and re-loving and re-living... from lack of better words


----------



## bellamaxjoy (Oct 27, 2011)

good for you!!! just keep positive, keep making sacrifices on both parts and the appriciation and love will come back. Remember love is not selfish, it is selfless. But aside your anger, and her too. I am so happpy to hear that you are both making strides in treating each other with respect.


----------



## Mrs. T (Aug 5, 2011)

Hey Random, are you still on a positive track? This has to be a record, and I'm going to start believing it pretty soon...Keep it up!


----------



## 2nd_t!me iz_best (Feb 28, 2011)

LOL


----------

