# She said she wants a divorce



## manonfire (Nov 29, 2012)

She says she thinks we should get a divorce.
She broke off our engagement when I was in basic training, through a letter. Yelled at me and hung up at me, on my two, 5 minute phone calls. And now that I'm deployed, tells me she wants a divorce. I should have saw this coming from a mile away. When she left me in basic training, she partied. Now that I'm deployed. Again, she is hanging out with some ***** girl she met at her new waitress job, and even went out to a club last weekend. Why do I do this to my self? Everytime I help out this girl back on her feet, and once she re establishes her job and foothold, she blows me off. Every. Single. Time. For 3 years. God, why do I love her so much? She is never there when I need there. The most stressful critical times of my life, she has to seriously just, put me on the back burner. I pay all the bills. I bought her a car. I bought her a mac book pro so she could pursue her graphic design dream, I pay her insurance. I do everything. I do most the cooking, I do most the cleaning. I am a god dang army ranger I don't have time for this **** anymore. f*ck. I am pretty sure she is cheating. Logged on to skype at 3 in the morning her time, she was actively on skype, asked her what shes doing, god mad and says 'its just online.'. Next day, shes not online. I checked her email, and there is a new 'ooVoo' (Just like skype) account created, with 1 friend. Some guy. She treats me like ****. Ignores me. Asked me for a divorce, and an hour later asked me for money for her 'text books'. I am so fed up with this. I've been so god dang good to this girl, and she seriously, over and over just, hurts me. When will I learn? Perhaps this is it?


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

This should be it. Looks like it's time to end your self torture. There are good women out there who are looking for good men. Stop spending your time on someone who does not care about you and is only using you.


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## manonfire (Nov 29, 2012)

EleGirl said:


> This should be it. Looks like it's time to end your self torture. There are good women out there who are looking for good men. Stop spending your time on someone who does not care about you and is only using you.


I've always just had a hard time letting her go. Watching her possibly be with someone else. Knowing, I left, and it POSSIBLY could have gotten better, burns me. I seriously, just want her to commit and cheat on me. That way, I am forced to lather in the pain of it, and leave her. I am pathetic.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Love makes people pathetic... myself included  Don't be so hard on yourself.

There are two ways that you can get over her. 

1) is that you stick around, pay all her bills, let her walk all over you and she cheats. Then some day you will fall out of love because you will be completely drained and defeated.

2) You choose to take the step to divorce her and end all contact with her. Given no contact you will fall out of love with her over time. Once you start to date again the falling out of love will accelerate. But here you are not drained and defeated.

So soldier, which battle plan will you chose?


.


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## manonfire (Nov 29, 2012)

I don't know, the logical answer is leave her ass in the grass. But, its something I have so much trouble doing.


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## Married in VA (Jan 6, 2012)

Manonfire,
Elegirl is right. You have two paths you can choose from.

Choice A - Be a doormat and "hope" she one day wakes up and realizes what she has at home after yet ANOTHER one night stand.

Choice B - Leave this self-absorbed, gold-digging woman behind and find yourself someone who is worth your time.

You are on deployment so you don't need to be dealing with this right now. I recommend choice B for the time being. And please don't give her any money other than what is required by regulations for her support since you are married. If she doesn't want you, then let her experience life without you (and your money). 

If she wants the divorce, then let her file it. No court action can take place while you are on deployment anyway. You can deal with it when you get home. Enjoy your time overseas. It is a little different for you soldiers. We sailors have it way better. Best of luck.


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