# Help Me Please!



## saber160 (May 23, 2009)

I really need some help. I have been married for 6 years now and I love my husband to death. Last week he exploded on me and told me that he doesn't think we are right for each other. My husband is one to keep things bottled up inside and so our communication has been an issue because he doesn't like confrontation and I want to try to fix things as soon as possible. I have admitted my mistakes and have told him I am not perfect, but he says that I will never understand how he feels. He says that every time we fought I down talked to him and I never appreciated him, but I know I do appreciate him I buy him little gifts for no reason and I tell him I love him, but I he has told me that part of the issue is the fact that I never changed my last name. He knew from the beginning that it was going to be very hard for me to give up my last name, but I am more than willing to change it now because I love him and I don't want to loose him over something like this, but he also says that we are no longer compatible and I think that we do. I want to try to work this out I don't want to lose this amazing man, but I feel like he has already made up his mind. He says he needs to concentrate on him and he has been contemplating for about a week now whether he wants to stay with me or us live our own lives, he says "it can go either way" but I am very much in love with him and he tells me he loves me too, but he says that I have hurt him too much and that I have not shown him how much I love him. I don't know what else to do to try to fix this without him thinking that I am only changing because thats what I know he wants. Please can someone give some advice??????


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

In what ways does he feel you are incompatible? In what ways did he want you to show him your love? (excluding changing your name).


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## leanpig (May 24, 2009)

My question to him would be what is her name? Sounds to me like he is fishing for a reason. He has either met someone on line or at work and is having a grand ole' emotional time with them. Of course, I could be wrong. But is he spending alot of alone time on the computer?


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## preso (May 1, 2009)

saber160 said:


> I really need some help. I have been married for 6 years now and I love my husband to death. Last week he exploded on me and told me that he doesn't think we are right for each other. My husband is one to keep things bottled up inside and so our communication has been an issue because he doesn't like confrontation and I want to try to fix things as soon as possible. I have admitted my mistakes and have told him I am not perfect, but he says that I will never understand how he feels. He says that every time we fought I down talked to him and I never appreciated him, but I know I do appreciate him I buy him little gifts for no reason and I tell him I love him, but I he has told me that part of the issue is the fact that I never changed my last name. He knew from the beginning that it was going to be very hard for me to give up my last name, but I am more than willing to change it now because I love him and I don't want to loose him over something like this, but he also says that we are no longer compatible and I think that we do. I want to try to work this out I don't want to lose this amazing man, but I feel like he has already made up his mind. He says he needs to concentrate on him and he has been contemplating for about a week now whether he wants to stay with me or us live our own lives, he says "it can go either way" but I am very much in love with him and he tells me he loves me too, but he says that I have hurt him too much and that I have not shown him how much I love him. I don't know what else to do to try to fix this without him thinking that I am only changing because thats what I know he wants. Please can someone give some advice??????


Far as your name you can hypenate it. I had to do mine like this as I am an adult with investments and cannot change my name so easily due to this.
Far as you showing appriciation for him, apparently... its not in the way he would like it or appriciate it. Everyone is different there and maybe yours and what you like is not his.
If he does not care if he's with you, maybe its best you break up. I was with a man like that one time and after we broke up I found someone so much better. It was a blessing to break up, maybe it will be for you too as he doesn't sound like he wants to be married, so why force him? he will just end up cheating on you or being an overly critical ass.


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