# Wife sharing fantasy



## greg28 (Jun 26, 2018)

I know that every relationship is different and there is no real definition of “normal” but is it wrong for me to have fantasies about my wife taking me and another man at the same time? Or just having sex while another couple watch? I’ve mentioned it to her but she never did come out and say no she just laughs. I know she would enjoy it since she often masturbates with 2 dildos and has intense orgasms when she’s penetrated this way. Should I ask her to do this or just keep it to myself?


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

greg28 said:


> I know that every relationship is different and there is no real definition of “normal” but is it wrong for me to have fantasies about my wife taking me and another man at the same time? Or just having sex while another couple watch? I’ve mentioned it to her but she never did come out and say no she just laughs. I know she would enjoy it since she often masturbates with 2 dildos and has intense orgasms when she’s penetrated this way. Should I ask her to do this or just keep it to myself?


There’s a big difference between masturbation and actually letting someone else **** your wife.She has laughed this off a few times,one day she won’t see it as funny and then it will be bye bye Greg.
How do you expect your wife to have any respect for a husband who wants to prostitute her out for his own gratification.Your cuckold fetish could sound the death knell for your marriage.


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## greg28 (Jun 26, 2018)

Who said anything about collecting money for sex? Isn’t that what prostitution is? Also, how is this just about my gratification when she also fantasizes about it? Did you even read the post?


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

greg28 said:


> Who said anything about collecting money for sex? Isn’t that what prostitution is? Also, how is this just about my gratification when she also fantasizes about it? Did you even read the post?


Ok buddy.I have my apology ready for when you show me where in your original post you say your wife fantasizes about sex with another man.Im waiting.......
As far a prostitution goes,you want your wife to have sex with another man purely to satisfy your cuckold desires.That is using your wife as a sex worker in my opinion.


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## TAMAT (Jun 20, 2015)

Greg,

What is common is that people go into these consensual extramarital activities and find out when it is too late that they have ruined their marriage and they never see their spouse the same way. Once you've sacrificed your exclusivity with your Wife.....

Your W falls in love with one of the OM.

Your W falls out of love with you.

Your W becomes promiscuous because of the implied consent.

You can never erase the image of the OM with your W and every time you look at her it comes back.

You realize you've given away what should be the most precious thing in your life to someone else for free.

The OM who would be willing to do this with your W may be some kind of player or other sort of promiscuous person who has no objection to destroying families. If anyone is a sex worker it is the OM in this case.

Tamat


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

greg28 said:


> Who said anything about collecting money for sex? Isn’t that what prostitution is? Also, how is this just about my gratification when she also fantasizes about it? Did you even read the post?


This topic has been covered ad-nauseum...

Talked out till, blue balled to death.

Go back in TAM archives and watch/read the peep shows.

Many men tried this...
Many marriages died.

This, a fact. 
Yes, yours' and others may/have come out without a hitch or a whimper.

Likely not.

If your' wife likes this twist, she will eventually fall out of love with you. She will not need you, except for a paycheck.
If your' wife tries the plunging swirl and hates it, she will like soon hate you.

If you value her a mere little, you have little to lose.

Once the meat is stabbed and marinated, there is no going back to pure un-adultrated lamb.



The Typist II-


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## greg28 (Jun 26, 2018)

Andy1001 said:


> greg28 said:
> 
> 
> > Who said anything about collecting money for sex? Isn’t that what prostitution is? Also, how is this just about my gratification when she also fantasizes about it? Did you even read the post?
> ...


You are right, I never mentioned in the original post that she fantasizes about sex with another man. I also didn’t ask for “opinions” or incorrect terms. Now somehow “cuckold” is brought in to the mix? Never said I wanted to be humiliated while I “watch” another man exploit my wife. The fact that she enjoys two d**ks at once, real or toys, demonstrates that it is a fantasy at least to some degree. The prejudice and stereotyping you create is the reason women today are so afraid to try anything that’s considered “unacceptable”. I would rather make a failed attempt at an activity that is pleasurable for both of us than to live in secrecy and end up like 95% of the desperate couples on here struggling to find a spark somewhere that’s too far gone...Finding the correct balance of fantasy/reality for the specific couple is key here. Too much of either can be hazardous but not as much as stereotyping and prejudice for sure...


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## Anastasia6 (May 28, 2017)

Oh OP. It's obvious this is something you want to try. But I'm a women I enjoy double penetration with my hubby and toys. I even sometimes have a little dream. I IN NO WAY would appreciate my husband bringing this to me seriously. 

You really should read some back threads. Many men get this idea and let it grow in their heads and bring it up to the wife and bring it up and bring it up. Til one day the wife says ok. It isn't usually ok. There are those that it turns out ok. But mostly no. The wife feels badgered used she loses respect for the man who would share her. It goes along for awhile til she puts her foot down and says no often times after she has built up too much resentment to stay in love with the man she wasn't enough for.

But it is plain your head is set. You e already brought it up she laughed it off. Just keep bringing it up. You'll wear her down both resolve and wear down her confidence. Someone will be along soon to tell you how it worked for them. You'll feel better and be right in the path to the destruction of your marriage. Hope you don't have kids.

Sigh
@Shesstillgotit


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## SentHereForAReason (Oct 25, 2017)

"I also didn't ask for opinions" ???????? (On a forum that you asked a question on)

Call me confused ... Did you come here looking to save 15% or more by switching your car insurance then?


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## zookeeper (Oct 2, 2012)

If you are this touchy about the subject, maybe you should find a swingers forum to seek advice. 

Do whatever you like, but don't say you weren't warned. 

As far as your claim that she fantasizes about this, so what? Not everyone wishes to act on their fantasies. I used to fantasize about taking a steaming dump on my old boss's desk. Doesn't mean I wanted my wife to hand me a roll of toilet paper and shove me in his office.


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## brooklynAnn (Jun 29, 2015)

Keep the fantasies as what they are, fantasies. Keep enjoying all the fun creative ways you guys bring into your lovemaking. Just dont take it outside and try to make them real because it can deal to all sorts of bad things happening. To the point that your wife wont trust you to give herself in all ways to you. You can cause her to lose her trust in you and her sexuality. 

We have been married for 26 years and enjoy our sex life. However, we will never indulge in our fantasies in real life. If my husband would ask me to do any of those things for real, i will kick his ass. 

Plus, i would hate to think my H values me so little that he wants to use let other people use me. I would lose all my love and respect for him. Resentment will build and I don't see our marriage lasting long after that.

So, if you want to stay happy and married to this woman, do not attempt to make anything real. Except the beach ones or the chocolate ones. You are very lucky that your wife shares so much with you and you have such a wonderful sex life, don't mess it up. There are many people here who would love and treasure half of what you have, don't be stupid. Treasure what you have.


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## happy2gether (Dec 6, 2015)

my wife and i are long term swingers and i can tell you that what we see most from people new to sharing is the husband pushes the wife into it. She starts to enjoy it, and he ends up jealous. things go downhill from there. BUT when both parties are equally and truly wanting to share the experience then problems are extremely rare. My advice would be don't talk her into it, but you should discuss your fantasy with her. If she wants to try it, great. if not, then drop it. and keep in mind that the main rule in any experience is if any 1 person feels things should stop, then they stop instantly.


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

greg28 said:


> You are right, I never mentioned in the original post that she fantasizes about sex with another man. I also didn’t ask for “opinions” or incorrect terms. Now somehow “cuckold” is brought in to the mix? Never said I wanted to be humiliated while I “watch” another man exploit my wife. The fact that she enjoys two d**ks at once, real or toys, demonstrates that it is a fantasy at least to some degree. The prejudice and stereotyping you create is the reason women today are so afraid to try anything that’s considered “unacceptable”. I would rather make a failed attempt at an activity that is pleasurable for both of us than to live in secrecy and end up like 95% of the desperate couples on here struggling to find a spark somewhere that’s too far gone...Finding the correct balance of fantasy/reality for the specific couple is key here. Too much of either can be hazardous but not as much as stereotyping and prejudice for sure...


Cuckold=A man who’s wife has sex with another man with or without his permission.
If you don’t see any difference between your wife using two dildos and you suggesting bringing another man into your bedroom then go right ahead.
And take your sanctimonious selfless self deluding opinion of yourself and keep it for the divorce lawyer.


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## CharlieParker (Aug 15, 2012)

I think it’s great that your wife can open up and share her fantasies with you.

ETA: carry on, I only read the thread title.


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## 2ntnuf (Jul 14, 2012)

greg28 said:


> I know that every relationship is different and there is no real definition of “normal” but is it wrong for me to have fantasies about my wife taking me and another man at the same time? Or just having sex while another couple watch? *I’ve mentioned it to her but she never did come out and say no she just laughs.* I know she would enjoy it since she often masturbates with 2 dildos and has intense orgasms when she’s penetrated this way. Should I ask her to do this or just keep it to myself?


Think about how she laughs. Does it sound like she thinks you don't have a clue? That's how I read that.

Just because she likes two dildos doesn't mean she wants two men. That's a whole different desire and thought process. 

This is something you would have been better off exploring while you were single and not in a relationship. There are some who can do it and not ruin their marriage, but they are likely not a majority of the total married population. 


I think your communication with her is in need of some work. That's a good place to start whether she is into it or not.


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## 269370 (Dec 17, 2016)

Isn't the laughing part not part of the fantasy too?


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

greg28 said:


> . I would rather make a failed attempt at an activity that is pleasurable for both of us than to live in secrecy and end up like 95% of the desperate couples on here struggling to find a spark somewhere that’s too far gone...Finding the correct balance of fantasy/reality for the specific couple is key here. Too much of either can be hazardous but not as much as stereotyping and prejudice for sure...


I'm going to give you some bonus points for this statement. 

That is pretty much the same philosophy and outlook that I had when I first brought up the subject of inviting others into our marital bed (figuratively speaking) after ten years of traditional marriage. 

In our case we researched it together and talked about seriously for a year or so, and then started to take a few incremental baby steps into the lifestyle. 


At about the two year mark after the topic was first raised was when we had actual full-swap sex with another couple. 

It worked for us and we eventually became very active swingers for a good number of years and have been to clubs and conventions and such at a variety of places across the country. 

The benefits of consensual nonmonogamy are pretty self evident and obvious. 

There are considerable pitfalls and risks and minefields as well. 

My suggestion at this point to do some sincere research into the subject matter together and have lots and lots of heart to heart discussions about it. 


It's great to fantasize about it and to talk about it and have it be part of your fantasy world in bed between the two of you. But it's a whole other realm to actually try to do it in the real world. 


Don't actually do anything in the real world until you are armed with facts (not just the paranoia and sky-is-falling panic that you will encounter on this forum) and *BOTH* you are truly wanting to move forward with it and try it in the real world. 


This is a 100-step program and you are on Step # 2 right now.


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

2ntnuf said:


> Think about how she laughs. Does it sound like she thinks you don't have a clue? That's how I read that.


That's not how I read it as someone who has actually been involved in this lifestyle. 

It is a test to see how serious he is and to see if he has the mettle to actually do it. 

There are millions of married women in the swinging lifestyle and that are ok with threesomes and open marriage and other forms of consensual nomonogamy. 

The one thing that every single one of them has in common with all the rest and every single one of them said no or just laughed or somehow pushed back the first time it was brought up to them. 

Not a single one of them anywhere on the surface of the earth, "Awesome, let's do it!" the first time their partner asked about it. 

Her laughing it off was a test to see if he was serious and to see if he would do the research and the legwork and the heavy lifting required to actually make it happen. 

She didn't say yes and she didn't say no. What she really said was, "SHOW ME that you are serious and if you are, do the research required and come to me when you have some kind of actual idea and plan of what you have in mind and we will discuss it further."

That is what her actual answer was. 

Now she may still say no when they sit down and discuss it seriously if she doesn't think that he has his head on straight or if it is something that she doesn't want to do. 

But her laugh to me indicates that he needs to gather more facts and insights and present her with a more thought-out and more prepared idea of what he is thinking. 

Otherwise, she would have just said no and would've been done with it.


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## greg28 (Jun 26, 2018)

It’s funny how someone uses the wrong words and then gets defensive when corrected. There are hundreds of definitions of cuckold depending on which site you use, but the main pleasure revolves around the sexual gratification for the man only. Again, if you read the post correctly, the wife and her feelings/fantasies were a concern, something that does not fit the cuckold fantasy/lifestyle. Swingers would fit the situation better. As for everyone else, I know the stats are terrible and it’s ultimately detrimental blah blah etc.. Did ANY one even read the part about balancing fantasy and reality? Sure, masturbation fantasies shouldn’t always be brought to life. I know this thank you that’s why I’m interested in hearing from couples who have explored this successfully rather than the same regurgitated line about the risk involved. Yes she did laugh about it. She also laughed when I brought up anal sex almost 20 years ago in which she can’t live without now. Thanks for assuming that it was a laugh towards my ridiculous proposal though. For the little amount of information provided about us people sure love to ASSume that I’m nagging her continuously for a threesome and have poor communication skills. Not every marriage is like yours or follows your belief/value system. I will continue to prostitute my wife, badger her constantly, and hopefully let the divorce lawyer have his way with her while I watch in humiliation. 😚


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## 269370 (Dec 17, 2016)

greg28 said:


> I will continue to prostitute my wife, badger her constantly, and hopefully let the divorce lawyer have his way with her while I watch in humiliation. 😚



Good thinking. That way, you are basically guaranteed to get the best settlement possible.

Sorry. Last joke. Yours sound more like a hot wife fantasy thingybob rather than cuckold or swinging.

If you really want to do it then do it. Would love to hear about the experience.



Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## 2ntnuf (Jul 14, 2012)

oldshirt said:


> That's not how I read it as someone who has actually been involved in this lifestyle.
> 
> It is a test to see how serious he is and to see if he has the mettle to actually do it.
> 
> ...


Neither you, nor I, know what she was thinking. My opinion about what her laugh means is as good as yours. Please respect my position in the matter, as I do yours. 

I'm sure many have told you they would not do it and have tried to shame you over your lifestyle. I have not, nor have I tried to shame him. 

They can only know what each other is thinking when they do some research and have some long deep honest and open conversations.


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## oldshirt (Apr 1, 2017)

2ntnuf said:


> Neither you, nor I, know what she was thinking. My opinion about what her laugh means is as good as yours. Please respect my position in the matter, as I do yours.
> 
> I'm sure many have told you they would not do it and have tried to shame you over your lifestyle. I have not, nor have I tried to shame him.
> 
> They can only know what each other is thinking when they do some research and have some long deep honest and open conversations.


There is no foul here in any way.

You may be completely right in that she thinks the idea is totally laughable. I respect your opinion and accept that you may be 100% on the money.

Either way, the way for him to find out her thoughts and position for sure is to do his homework and lay it all out there and ask her.

My suggestion is to not ask her for a definative yes or no initially in the first discussion because Chick-Code will require her to say no to the first discussion.

My suggestion is for him to ask her to engage him in serious, open discussion about it and to share her honest thoughts, feelings and concerns about the matter and not necessarily a yes/no answer right out of the chute.


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## 2ntnuf (Jul 14, 2012)

oldshirt said:


> There is no foul here in any way.
> 
> You may be completely right in that she thinks the idea is totally laughable. I respect your opinion and accept that you may be 100% on the money.
> 
> ...


That would be like telling her he doesn't want an answer if it is truly, "No". 

It feels too controlling and manipulative. 

I think he is no where near even broaching the subject unless they have discussed all they have done in the past and have accepted it without a loss of respect or love. There is a thread on that here and the woman does make some good points.

He probably can't bring up their sex lives openly like that until he and she trust each other deeply. I could surely be wrong, but he wouldn't be here if he could talk with her, I guess.


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## OnTheFly (Mar 12, 2015)

greg28 said:


> Hi, I'm Greg, my brain has been destroyed by high speed internet porn. I'm looking for ways to end my marriage the quickest. No opinions please…thx G.


So, I know this isn't an actual quote, but it's what I gleaned from the OP.


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## Rubix Cubed (Feb 21, 2016)

greg28 said:


> Should I ask her to do this or just keep it to myself?





greg28 said:


> I also didn’t ask for “opinions” ...


 Ya didn't huh?

Did you just come here to stir up **** and get a rise out of everybody. They've got a word for that.

Opinion or not I say go for it. Get the biggest Bull you can find, because that's GOT to be in her fantasy as well. I mean she's got big dildoes right? Maybe you should get two or three bulls. That's probably what she's thinking when her eyes are closed. 
Have at it, you'll love it ... probably.


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## Imissmywife (Jan 29, 2016)

Sorry Greg.......kind of a rough crowd here. I think Oldshirt said it best.......GO SLOWLY. TALK TALK TALK.
When my wife and I were first together we did the usual pillow talk and of course fantasies were involved. The usual sex on the beach, a hut on Bora Bora etc. Low and behold we both had the same fantasy of her having two men at once, and one of her being with another woman. My sexual soul mate. Anyway over the course of a year plus we talked, researched, fantasized, role played etc. it always worked. Two things that seemed to tip the scales.......one night while having some really good sex I whispered in her ear "your husband is really getting off watching me **** his wife"! She had an incredible orgasm almost immediately. Secondly while she was performing oral on me and I was using one of her toys in her I told her we needed to find a real life "toy" for her to play with. She stopped, looked me square in the eyes and said "Then find me one". So I did.....a long time friend from college, lived 500 miles away, and who visited out town a couple times a year. Discreet, respectful, loyal, safe and clean. Turned out he was also an incredible lover. We shared 3 nights with him over the course of 6 months, and all were incredible. We stopped the extracurricular activities when we decided to start a family. That was almost 20 years ago, and sometimes I wish we were still at it, but we have those memories.
Regardless of how long it's been, those memories are forever burned in my mind. Will it ever happen again? No, especially since we're in our late 50 s and the Mrs has some health issues. Do I wish we were still at it, especially with our friend? Sure.
Good luck whichever path you and your wife travel.


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

OnTheFly said:


> So, I know this isn't an actual quote, but it's what I gleaned from the OP.


Thanks, the is a threadjack, yet it isn't.

Porn shows it's viewers what is possible, what looks like fun.
IT SHOWS the viewers what they are missing.

Shows what is possible.
Shows the viewer all the sexual possibilities.

Actually, it shows people physically interacting.
It does not show what they are thinking.

It does not show the aftermath damage to one's psyche after debauching oneself repeatedly.

It seems......

It seems to me that 'normal' sexual relations would be destroyed by seeing others performing like circus pets. The sexual acrobatics become more important than the act of a loving couple making love.

Yes, it can help people do better in the bedroom. They can learn from watching others.

But, when you add in all the other wild stuff seen in porn, the bad outweighs the good by a mouthful. Uh, that's bad.

Too much sexual knowledge and exposure can make a person yearn for something beyond healthy.

Just Sayin-






SCM-


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## Lurkster (Feb 8, 2016)

We have known a few couples that got into the swapping thing, and sharing, and getting in a pile with another couple. They all became what is know as divorced. 
Not a good idea at all. Wouldn't even think of doing something like that. 

Close as we get to it, is I'll do oral on her with a dildo in her at the same time.....after we have had sex. 
Close enough!
And as close as we will get, or want to!


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## happiness27 (Nov 14, 2012)

greg28 said:


> I know that every relationship is different and there is no real definition of “normal” but is it wrong for me to have fantasies about my wife taking me and another man at the same time? Or just having sex while another couple watch? I’ve mentioned it to her but she never did come out and say no she just laughs. I know she would enjoy it since she often masturbates with 2 dildos and has intense orgasms when she’s penetrated this way. Should I ask her to do this or just keep it to myself?


If I read what you are writing correctly, you are asking if it's wrong to have fantasies...the answer is: of course not. 

Are you also extending that fantasy to say "Is it wrong to have a fantasy about another couple watching us have sex?" the answer is: of course not. 

Are you asking her to fantasize this with you? Sure, ask her, why not? 

It's YOUR bedroom and YOUR sex partner.

I've got fantasies of watching my husband have sex with another woman. It's pretty powerful. 

As far as actually doing that, it doesn't require a prostitute. There are lots of players within the swinging community.

I guess you have to be careful what you wish for, though, because fantasy and reality are truly, truly, truly very different. The reality of that situation would include being extremely eyes-wide-open about exposing you and your spouse to STDs and how any and all parties would react. That's EVEN if your wife would want to do that - and that would be totally, totally up to her and her preference, not just to please you.

But, if you are asking in fantasy, go for it.


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## happiness27 (Nov 14, 2012)

SunCMars said:


> Thanks, the is a threadjack, yet it isn't.
> 
> Porn shows it's viewers what is possible, what looks like fun.
> IT SHOWS the viewers what they are missing.
> ...


Fantasy exploration is a person's personal privacy right. 


"Too much sexual knowledge and exposure can make a person yearn for something beyond healthy."

Define "healthy"


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

You said that you know she would enjoy it. No you don't know that, you are assuming. Using sex toys is way way different from bringing another person in.


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## happiness27 (Nov 14, 2012)

Andy1001 said:


> Cuckold=A man who’s wife has sex with another man with or without his permission.
> If you don’t see any difference between your wife using two dildos and you suggesting bringing another man into your bedroom then go right ahead.
> And take your sanctimonious selfless self deluding opinion of yourself and keep it for the divorce lawyer.


The name-calling is inappropriate. "And take your sanctimonious selfless self deluding opinion of yourself and keep it for the divorce lawyer."


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## I shouldnthave (Apr 11, 2018)

I completely agree with Old Shirt that you are on step 2 of 100.

This has to be a long, and very very well thought out process.

My husband and I considered a MFM. It was my fantasy before his, but he was the one brave enough to start discussing it further.

First we talked about, really talked about it, the potential pit falls etc.

Then we joined lifestyle groups in line and talked and talked some more. We started sharing pictures and videos etc.

Eventually (months later) we started talking to "prospects", one in particular we communicated with often, went on a date with etc - but still did not feel "ready".

We attended swinger meet up - again in some cases couple's we had been talking to for months... But still, neither of us felt compelled to actually take the next step.

For us, at this point at least we have learned a lot, from others, and about ourselves, what our desires are, where our boundaries are - and in the process discovered a lot about each other and have had real really hot sex!

I am really glad we have been taking our time. Will it happen someday? Eh, maybe, but right now I do not see it.

Dipping a toe into that lifestyle has been fun, but has made me less enamored than the time before I knew what I do now. 

Do I like to fantasize about it? Do I like it when he brings it up while talking dirty? I love it! Would I actually like a threesome? I don't know.




oldshirt said:


> The one thing that every single one of them has in common with all the rest and every single one of them said no or just laughed or somehow pushed back the first time it was brought up to them.
> 
> Not a single one of them anywhere on the surface of the earth, "Awesome, let's do it!" the first time their partner asked about it.
> .


Okay, maybe I didn't say "let's do it"! But it was as much my idea as his - there was no pushing. And if there was pushing, I wouldn't feel respected. Pushing, for someone like me is the surefire way to get totally shut down.


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## happiness27 (Nov 14, 2012)

I Shouldnthave is the voice of experience here. Fantasy = none of anybody else's business. Reality = other real people involved and a whole lot of other considerations, not the least of which is STDs and how to avoid them, including oral sex which transmits most STDs quite readily (any of you ladies like fellatio with a condom? uh-uh), the weeks, months of getting to know someone or some people well enough to go forward, and then how will anybody react in reality? 

I agree with this lady I Shouldnthave as that has been exactly our experience. What the whole experience has actually ended up doing was allow the two of us as a couple to examine ourselves more closely than ever. Even if we never get anything else out of it, it's been worth that much. 

But fantasize? Heck yeah. Any honest person in this forum is going to tell you that all kinds of thoughts go through one's mind during sex, some fleeting, some recurring, some new, some probably kinky. But what's that old saying "If somebody else does it, it's kinky, if WE do it, it's normal."


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## Marriednatlanta (Sep 21, 2016)

greg28 said:


> I know that every relationship is different and there is no real definition of “normal” but is it wrong for me to have fantasies about my wife taking me and another man at the same time? Or just having sex while another couple watch? I’ve mentioned it to her but she never did come out and say no she just laughs. I know she would enjoy it since she often masturbates with 2 dildos and has intense orgasms when she’s penetrated this way. Should I ask her to do this or just keep it to myself?


I think its a pretty standard fantasy of "most" married guys. What is probably not standard is the description of your DW and her desire for double penetration. I think most guys on this board would be quite envious of your DW and her willingness for double penetration. 

Also, I classify this as "be careful what you ask for" category.


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## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

Fantisising and crossing the line are two totally different things. You both must be very sure about this, your wife sounds as if she is just humouring your fantasy that is all. You sound selfish and forcing this and throwing a tantrum on this forum when Tam'ers say it is not a good idea. Greg, I think you need to grow up first before indulging in adult games. AND listen to your bloody wife.


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## ABHale (Jan 3, 2016)

greg28 said:


> You are right, I never mentioned in the original post that she fantasizes about sex with another man. I also didn’t ask for “opinions” or incorrect terms. Now somehow “cuckold” is brought in to the mix? Never said I wanted to be humiliated while I “watch” another man exploit my wife. The fact that she enjoys two d**ks at once, real or toys, demonstrates that it is a fantasy at least to some degree. The prejudice and stereotyping you create is the reason women today are so afraid to try anything that’s considered “unacceptable”. I would rather make a failed attempt at an activity that is pleasurable for both of us than to live in secrecy and end up like 95% of the desperate couples on here struggling to find a spark somewhere that’s too far gone...Finding the correct balance of fantasy/reality for the specific couple is key here. Too much of either can be hazardous but not as much as stereotyping and prejudice for sure...


What do you think the OM is going to think of you?

There you are with another man doing your wife in front of you. He is thinking what a ****ing wuss. 

You will be humiliating yourself. Then your wife will more then likely lose all respect for you. Why, because you don’t respect her or yourself.


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## dadstartingover (Oct 23, 2015)

Men tend to jump from sexual fantasy to "let's make this really happen!" waaaaay too fast. Whether it's a threesome with a woman or watching your wife get plowed by another dude, sex, in general, brings with it a whole host of emotions and complications that you can't really see until you experience them. \

In other words, be VERY VERY careful, because your irrational horndog ways can absolutely tear down your marriage in a heartbeat.

Give it a few years. Seriously. I've seen this exact scenario play out before, and it tends to not end well.


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## Steve2.0 (Dec 11, 2017)

I think there is more value in you evaluating why you would want another man in your wife INSTEAD of playing with the idea on how to make it happen

Too much porn maybe??


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## personofinterest (Apr 6, 2018)

Steve2.0 said:


> I think there is more value in you evaluating why you would want another man in your wife INSTEAD of playing with the idea on how to make it happen
> 
> Too much porn maybe??


This is a very good observation. I have to say, I have enjoyed a toy AND hubby, but if he told me he wanted me to be with another man....my respect for him would plummet. I'd question his manhood, to be perfectly honest. I'm HIS, not anybody else's.


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## His_Response (Jun 14, 2018)

greg28 said:


> I know that every relationship is different and there is no real definition of “normal” but is it wrong for me to have fantasies about my wife taking me and another man at the same time? Or just having sex while another couple watch? I’ve mentioned it to her but she never did come out and say no she just laughs. I know she would enjoy it since she often masturbates with 2 dildos and has intense orgasms when she’s penetrated this way. Should I ask her to do this or just keep it to myself?


Heya, Greg...


I'm ignoring most of the other replies because you're going to get inundated in 'Your marriage is over, here's why...' posts.

First, I totally understand your desire, especially if the reason you seek it is you love to see your wife being pleasured. There's nothing wrong with having fantasies.

I had fantasies of this kind for several years, never told my wife until a few years ago... now, we're swingers. HOWEVER... I *don't* suggest that as an option to you. Most couples cannot make the transition this kind of lifestyle and still have their relationship survive. 

How long have you two been together? 

Personally, I would not push the fantasy. Rather, I would ask her to let you know if she has any fantasies. It took quite a while for my wife to open up and admit she had a fantasy of this nature. Even then, going from fantasy to reality is something that might not be a good idea. Some fantasies are better left as just that.

I'll PM you some details of how things went with my wife and I. Don't want to hijack your thread. ;P


-H.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

At H27 who quoted ISH and added to it...



happiness27 said:


> I Shouldnthave is the voice of experience here. Fantasy = none of anybody else's business. Reality = other real people involved and a whole lot of other considerations, not the least of which is STDs and how to avoid them, including oral sex which transmits most STDs quite readily (any of you ladies like fellatio with a condom? uh-uh), the weeks, months of getting to know someone or some people well enough to go forward, and then how will anybody react in reality?
> 
> I agree with this lady I Shouldnthave as that has been exactly our experience. What the whole experience has actually ended up doing was allow the two of us as a couple to examine ourselves more closely than ever. Even if we never get anything else out of it, it's been worth that much.
> 
> But fantasize? Heck yeah. Any honest person in this forum is going to tell you that all kinds of thoughts go through one's mind during sex, some fleeting, some recurring, some new, some probably kinky. But what's that old saying "If somebody else does it, it's kinky, if WE do it, it's normal."


I agree with you on this. Maybe for the first time (humor)!

Well said. &#55357;&#56842;


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