# Women who are cheated on win in long term



## 2asdf2 (Jun 5, 2012)

Interesting article in The Telegraph.

Women who are cheated on win in long term, while "other woman" loses, say scientists *


I think it applies to men also, not just to women.


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## Acoa (Sep 21, 2012)

Seems like a lot of time and energy spent to validate Chump Lady's motto, "leave a cheater, gain a life." 

Too bad the article doesn't go into any data or discuss the methodology of the study. I find that much more interesting than some reporter's interpretation of the abstract.


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## Clay2013 (Oct 30, 2013)

Acoa said:


> Seems like a lot of time and energy spent to validate Chump Lady's motto, "leave a cheater, gain a life."
> 
> Too bad the article doesn't go into any data or discuss the methodology of the study. I find that much more interesting than some reporter's interpretation of the abstract.


I don't read much on her site ever but I do agree with that Motto a 100%. There is nothing to gain in the short term or long run staying with a cheater. I know where are people that have turned this around and good for them but when your in the position there is no way to tell who is going to make it work and who wont. With those odds against the BS I think just walking away is always the best answer. 

I stayed with a serial cheater for ten years. She was not the first woman to have cheated on me. I tried everything from trying to nice my way back to kicking them out. Its all a gamble and seriously its not worth the time. life is to short to waste it on someone that has already proven they don't care how you feel or what you think. 

Just my rant for the day lol 

Sorry 

C


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## ReformedHubby (Jan 9, 2013)

I agree that dumping a cheater usually does make someone happier in the long run, but I'm not sure I'm buying their argument about enhanced mate selection intelligence. That's like crystal ball stuff to me. How can anyone really be sure if that good apple they picked won't turn bad one day? I'm not trying to be cynical here, I just think that the odds of a new mate cheating are the same percentage wise as the first. I certainly think the new mate should be given the benefit of the doubt, but at the same time I don't really think there are ever any guarantees in relationships when it comes to infidelity.


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## Acoa (Sep 21, 2012)

ReformedHubby said:


> I agree that dumping a cheater usually does make someone happier in the long run, but I'm not sure I'm buying their argument about enhanced mate selection intelligence. That's like crystal ball stuff to me. How can anyone really be sure if that good apple they picked won't turn bad one day? I'm not trying to be cynical here, I just think that the odds of a new mate cheating are the same percentage wise as the first. I certainly think the new mate should be given the benefit of the doubt, but at the same time I don't really think there are ever any guarantees in relationships when it comes to infidelity.


Enhanced doesn't mean perfect or guaranteed. Just means better. I know now how to spot a narcissist a mile away. I know to stay away from that, or girls with daddy issues.


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## manfromlamancha (Jul 4, 2013)

Trust academics and consultants to make a quick buck out of stating/publishing the obvious.


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## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

Acoa said:


> Enhanced doesn't mean perfect or guaranteed. Just means better. I know now how to spot a narcissist a mile away. I know to stay away from that, or girls with daddy issues.


Yep. I wouldn't be taken in by the same things, or fooled as easily now as I was by my ex-husband. I could be fooled by different things, I suppose, but I'm overall much less blindly trusting and much more aware of all the different ways crazy/dysfunctional can present itself. Someone would have to come up with a whole new brand of crazy and hide it really well for me to fail to spot it. Experience is an excellent teacher for those willing to learn.


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## Mclane (Apr 28, 2016)

They might win "in the long run" but they lose in the short run. Especially if they are not strong enough to break away.

So what in the end they dump the cheating loser. Meanwhile their lives a they knew it have been shattered, and there's real damage done. They'll probably never be able to trust again, and all the time, effort, money, and emotions they invested in that relationship was for nothing.

Nobody wins. Unless you define winning as being "less of a loser than the other person".


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