# Hurting



## JDP (Sep 30, 2014)

My wife and I have been married for 17 years we have 3 great girls (14,12 and 10) oh yeah and 2 male dogs sadly they are neutered
I was a business owner for most of those years and we had a fair share of hard times and some pretty darn good years I was forced into selling the business in 2008 the buyer backed out and didn’t pay anything, I did have legal representation…… I took a Job with a large company in TN and ran a division for them. We live in OH so I went down to TN for 3-4 weeks at a time I worked 12-14 hours a day 6 days a week. After 2 years of living like this the company basically said move or quit I brought my wife down to TN to look at homes. I can remember that we both looked at each other and said this just isn’t right I was able to find a more local job in OH it does not pay what I was making and it’s a lessor position the work is difficult at best and I have a boss (not a leader) who makes my life miserable. But I am now DAD and trying to be a better husband this was 5 years ago. 
A lot has happened I put my wife through HELL because I was basically a workaholic with my business trying to make it grow we had to file for bankruptcy (very difficult) I basically left my wife to raise our girls life was difficult for a few years (who by the way supported everything I did and was always by my side) 

Over the next 5 years I took on many life tasks: yes you really have to pick the socks up empty the dishwasher sweep the floor and things that might seem trivial but they have a profound impact on the family. I recently quit smoking I smoked for 25+ years 2 packs a day so big life changes because I again did these things for my wife and my girls (myself as well)

For the past 4 years my wife has getting more and more distant she is cold and shallow and she is now Aggressive passive I am a follower I won’t let her go until she replies and that leads to a big blow up and I eventually blow my cork. All of the new life changes I made were all born out of arguments I am lacking her respect and her affection 

In one argument I said I had this laundry list of things I needed to do to make things better (and she was right and they were things I needed to accomplish) A BIG motivator to quit smoking would to be to be able to get closer to you and that was met with “I can’t make any promises to you” I stopped anyways (day 15) hoping it would somehow display my want for her. The arguments are always the same and the outcome is always the same I have this, this and that do accomplish and she will most certainly try we have seen a consular who had great suggestion for me and not so much for her. She felt the need to go back to the consular by herself (I did not ask why she needed to go without me) 
For a little while we were closer and I could see she was making some changes sadly I drank too much the other night (yeah I know stupid) and I was feeling sorry for myself and one thing lead to another we will go for weeks without an argument and then I feel bad and I am really needy (many different factors to why) 
In this last fight it was 100% my issue she did nothing wrong but some really hurtful things came out of this (focused at me) she says she really doesn’t love my like that anymore…… I’m like one of the dogs now. I sacrificed myself for her and my family, I just can’t get her to want to do anymore because she feels abandoned because of what I did 5 years ago (work) and now she is saying because I have pursued her during arguments that she now has mental scares that will never heal I was crushed last night perhaps she is right but I really don’t know what to do, heck I don’t have any of my buddies left to talk too I have not eaten or slept again and its taking a toll on my work I can’t face another day like this and its killing my girls I am a Christian and I do not believe in God making mistakes she does God does make mistakes she believes that we should not be together Not sure what I should do I had to beg and I mean beg for her not to leave yesterday……


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## DoF (Mar 27, 2014)

You have done great amount of damage by being a Workoholic, you know this already. 

You basically told your wife (with ACTIONS) that work/business is more important than a) HER and b)your family.

In time, yea, just about ANY person under those conditions would distance themselves and lose love/feelings.

For now, I would tell you to ignore what she said....

First, sit her down and appologize for being a complete ass last night.

Second, stop drinking, tell her that. Clearly alcohol makes you into a ****ty person.

Third, find out if there is even a chance of fixing things. Ask her if what she said the other night is true. Ask her if she loves you. 

See what she says. If she has lost her feelings for you already, your relationship is over.

Be nice, remember, if you were to be her over the years, you would probably be done too at this point.

So whatever happens, just thank her for honesty and start working TOGETHER towards divorce.

Remember, if you guys can resolve the details yourself.......lawyers won't make out with your/her money. So it's in BOTH of your best interests to do so in a adult/healthy way.

Assuming she still loves you and wants to make things worse.......well, come back and let us know and we can take it from there.

Good luck and keep us posted.


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## weightlifter (Dec 14, 2012)

Do a non electronic sweep for another man. Note I see only one major flag but rule it out.

Check phone bills, text records, facebook patterns and email. I don't yet see enough to go all 007 but do due diligence and DO NOT ASK OR TELL HER ABOUT LOOKING AROUND!

If she is innocent you accuse her.
If she is guilty she goes underground and snows you.

What on earth possessed you to leave her alone for two years? You should have brought her down to live with you.

I get it sometimes the husband moves to a new work ahead of the family. This is 30 to 120 days worth. Not two years.


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## JDP (Sep 30, 2014)

DoF its hard to hear that but it may be the reality, I worked because I thought it was the right thing to do. She is a good woman


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Get His Needs Her Needs, read it, then ask her to read it with you. And start attending anger management classes and let her know what you're learning in it. Start spending time with her as she allows it, to rebuild that bond. Spend as much time as you can fit in with your kids.


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## JDP (Sep 30, 2014)

I read it we started to read it together then..... Kids and the house and the dogs Good book but a book for self help needs to be applied to be effective. She starts off great and then life happens and nothing gets done. I am left with doing the change


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

You can still learn her Emotional Needs and figure out your Love Busters and ramp up the first while eliminating the second. One person CAN turn around a marriage, if the other one is just unhappy with it.


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## FormerSelf (Apr 21, 2013)

I know you feel panicked right now, but you have to be very careful to not crowd her with your fear of her leaving. Give her all of the space she needs, and save your moping, sadness, crying, begging, pleading...keep all of that to yourself. I am not saying that you should by bouncy and skippy like a fool, but try to not walk around the house with a dark cloud over your head. The more you hover over her, dying for her to change her mind, the more pressured and claustrophobic she will feel, almost forcing her to want to get away.

Let her know that you understand why she feels that way and you aren't going to stand in the way of she wants out, but tell her that when she is ready, you are ready to hear everything that she needs to say about it. This will leave her with the power of her choice and give her the space to rationally think about it. But if you crowd her and act like you have no self-respect, you are only going to repulse her. If she decides to finally sit and talk, then don't try to steer the argument, just let her have her say and show that you understand, even if you don't agree.

Yes, she may be talking to the counselor because she is considering leaving. Yes, she could have given up a log time ago and has started a new relationship. We don't know this yet, so don't embitter her more by slipping back into smoking and drinking. At the same time, don't expect her heart to do a complete 180 after a couple weeks after you quit.."See? I'm changed! It's all fixed!" It's NOT fixed. She has years of built-up loneliness, anger, and resentment. That last bit of drinking and yelling put you guys at ground zero again. She has no hope of things getting better.

She is tired of your bs and broken promises. Just show her by action...don't make your changes, and look to her for approval. Change because you actually WANT TO CHANGE and not just for a marriage band-aid. You do this by not talking about what you are going to do for her and the marriage, just do it. It will be so much more meaningful. And if you give her space at the same time, she may get curious about the changes that she is seeing in you that are naturally occurring...and not a bs sales pitch.


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## DoF (Mar 27, 2014)

JDP said:


> DoF its hard to hear that but it may be the reality, I worked because I thought it was the right thing to do. She is a good woman


I understand, but you know that life needs a balance.

Too much of ANYTHING is NEVER good. Or as I like to say "ANYTHING taken to the extreme is NEVER good".

You have to accept that your workaholic has done EXTREME damage to your wife/family.

I'm surprised your wife actually stood by you and I would be shocked to find out that she hasn't cheated.....

Regardless, your next step would be to apologize and acknowledge it all and step 2 to get a feeling if these is any hope from your wife's end.


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## happy as a clam (Jan 5, 2014)

I agree with weightlifter. My spidey sense is up that there is another man waiting in the wings...

Do your due diligence... check phone records, email, social media. Then come back and tell us what you found.

P.S. Normal people don't "hold grudges for five years" (your work troubles). There is something more recent going on with HER. Investigate.


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## DoF (Mar 27, 2014)

FormerSelf said:


> I know you feel panicked right now, but you have to be very careful to not crowd her with your fear of her leaving. Give her all of the space she needs, and save your moping, sadness, crying, begging, pleading...keep all of that to yourself. I am not saying that you should by bouncy and skippy like a fool, but try to not walk around the house with a dark cloud over your head. The more you hover over her, dying for her to change her mind, the more pressured and claustrophobic she will feel, almost forcing her to want to get away.
> 
> Let her know that you understand why she feels that way and you aren't going to stand in the way of she wants out, but tell her that when she is ready, you are ready to hear everything that she needs to say about it. This will leave her with the power of her choice and give her the space to rationally think about it. But if you crowd her and act like you have no self-respect, you are only going to repulse her. If she decides to finally sit and talk, then don't try to steer the argument, just let her have her say and show that you understand, even if you don't agree.
> 
> ...


This....ALL of it.

Also OP, your thread title says hurting. Accept the fact that your wife is hurting WAY more than you are just about now and has been for YEARS.


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## JDP (Sep 30, 2014)

turnera said:


> You can still learn her Emotional Needs and figure out your Love Busters and ramp up the first while eliminating the second. One person CAN turn around a marriage, if the other one is just unhappy with it.


I thought I was applying the principles but its worth a second read its been a few years


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## JDP (Sep 30, 2014)

FormerSelf said:


> I know you feel panicked right now, but you have to be very careful to not crowd her with your fear of her leaving. Give her all of the space she needs, and save your moping, sadness, crying, begging, pleading...keep all of that to yourself. I am not saying that you should by bouncy and skippy like a fool, but try to not walk around the house with a dark cloud over your head. The more you hover over her, dying for her to change her mind, the more pressured and claustrophobic she will feel, almost forcing her to want to get away.
> 
> Let her know that you understand why she feels that way and you aren't going to stand in the way of she wants out, but tell her that when she is ready, you are ready to hear everything that she needs to say about it. This will leave her with the power of her choice and give her the space to rationally think about it. But if you crowd her and act like you have no self-respect, you are only going to repulse her. If she decides to finally sit and talk, then don't try to steer the argument, just let her have her say and show that you understand, even if you don't agree.
> 
> ...


You are right 
I do take exception to BS and broken promises I have been focused on our family for 5 years But then again it took 12 years to screw it up 
Space and time........ 100% agree 
Thank you


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## JDP (Sep 30, 2014)

DoF said:


> I understand, but you know that life needs a balance.
> 
> Too much of ANYTHING is NEVER good. Or as I like to say "ANYTHING taken to the extreme is NEVER good".
> 
> ...


I was a workaholic that's why I took this God forsaken job....and work for a BOSS I have changed for my family not out of self


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

JDP said:


> I thought I was applying the principles but its worth a second read its been a few years


Fill out the questionnaires.

Snoop for another man.

Read No More Mr Nice Guy next.


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## JDP (Sep 30, 2014)

turnera said:


> Fill out the questionnaires.
> 
> Snoop for another man.
> 
> Read No More Mr Nice Guy next.


I have hinted around that a while back and I did snoop a bit then if she was hiding anything she was darn good at concealment I had her I-phone the tablet and I could not find anything When I hinted to her that she might be she blew up 
Some signs are their that she could be Ill get that book thanks


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Check the phone records. If one number shows up that you don't know, investigate.


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## Blondilocks (Jul 4, 2013)

Some people need time to think during an argument. A time out is a reasonable request. Following them and hounding them 'til they give in is emotional abuse. Exercise some self-restraint and give her time to come back to you to continue the argument/discussion. Good luck.


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## FormerSelf (Apr 21, 2013)

JDP said:


> You are right
> I do take exception to BS and broken promises I have been focused on our family for 5 years But then again it took 12 years to screw it up
> Space and time........ 100% agree
> Thank you


What I mean by BS and broken promises are things like, "Hang in there it will get better. I promise, just a little longer. Or, I'm done with drinking." I am talking about all of the constant verbal band-aids that us guys resort to when our wife is angry. We're not sure why they're pissed, so we try to placate them to get them to smile again because we think they are just being emotional. "Be happy. Hang in there. It'll get better. Ok, she's fixed." 

After a few years of this, they will RESENT that response, and become fully convinced that we do not care, don't want to face reality, and have no plan on ever addressing their needs.

I am not saying anything about you being a good provider, putting the family first...as I am sure you sacrificed a lot, but I also KNOW you are also shocked to hear that your wife is unhappy. YOU don't know how common this is: a husband does his perceived duty only to discover his wife is ready to walk out on him. 

Wives RARELY get to this level of contempt without saying something about it, but sadly, us guys often don't get or understand what they are saying until it's too late. We don't realize that some of their concerns, often spoken in intuitive, non-logical speak, comes from their internal alarm system that often gets disregarded and swept under the rug. We say, "It will get better"...and one day THEY WILL NOT BUY IT, won't trust you, will feel resentful, and will start looking for an exit strategy, even if it means sabotaging the marriage.

This is no longer about winning an argument or being right...this is about turning the marriage around.


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## farsidejunky (Mar 19, 2014)

JDP:

You have a dificult task ahead of you. You have no credibility with your wife. She does not trust you.

You need to read NMMNG. You have to start saying what you mean and meaning what you say, no matter how uncomfortable it may be. 

You have to become a man worthy of your wifes admiration. Are you that person right now? If not, start being that person 5 minutes ago. It may feel foreign, but as Turnera likes to say, fake it till you make it.

I would also suggest pm ' ing MEM11363. I was in a similar situation; Mem, Turnera and a couple of others were instrumental in helping me turn my situation around.

Understand that it may not work. But I promise you that if you don't become a better man it will definitely not work.


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## lonelyhusband321 (Feb 18, 2014)

You are at a terribly hurtful time in your life, OP.

You will feel things that you've never even thought you would feel - trust me!

At the end of the day, your "gut" will tell you the absoute truth - whether you like it or not, and you will have to sit all alone with YOU and decide how to handle your situation.

Like some of the others, my "spidey sense" tells me there just very well be "another". Maybe it's just a "friendship" to them right now, but there's something (aka experience) that tells me there is more to it.

Please feel free to PM me at any time. I really do feel your pain!


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## lonelyhusband321 (Feb 18, 2014)

turnera said:


> Check the phone records. If one number shows up that you don't know, investigate.


:iagree::iagree::iagree:

REALLY good stuff here, OP...


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## JDP (Sep 30, 2014)

turnera said:


> Check the phone records. If one number shows up that you don't know, investigate.


Okay I checked her phone I know her pass word from over a year ago when I lost my phone (I really feel bad about it) Nothing that jumps out no messages no calls or numbers 
However one thing did stick out the dates and times were she has 10 calls during the day this week and last, it then jumps to several weeks the data could have been wiped 
Next I will go to the billing but I fell like crap for doing this


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## weightlifter (Dec 14, 2012)

IM hoping you feel like worse crap (for looking at bills) ...

The reason is if I'm right about this

Its much worse.

LH321 went thru it


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## JDP (Sep 30, 2014)

farsidejunky said:


> JDP:
> 
> You have a dificult task ahead of you. You have no credibility with your wife. She does not trust you.
> 
> ...


I think you may have hit the nail dead on.....I am a fixer its what I do at work I come home to say I can fix this too, but sadly I think I am still the one who is broken


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

IF she is cheating, and you snoop to figure it out, you are HELPING your marriage by doing so. Most cheaters are just addicts - they get addicted to the high of the secret meetings, the high of the attention, and the ego stroking. If you were to discover it, and STOP it, it's possible she could stop it and return to the marriage and eventually be grateful that you stopped her.


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## JDP (Sep 30, 2014)

turnera said:


> IF she is cheating, and you snoop to figure it out, you are HELPING your marriage by doing so. Most cheaters are just addicts - they get addicted to the high of the secret meetings, the high of the attention, and the ego stroking. If you were to discover it, and STOP it, it's possible she could stop it and return to the marriage and eventually be grateful that you stopped her.


I don't want to have my head in the sand either BUT I am leaning that she has disconnected from the relationship and perhaps she is now preparing for either a divorce or expanding a current relationship (friends)
Either way thanks to all great advice and I just need to man up and stop being a little girl I am hopeful she is too good of a woman just to let go


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Read NMMNG before you do anything. 

That said, many women DO just give up and leave marriages; but that's usually because the husband has taken the marriage for granted, she's done the bulk of carrying the marriage and family, and he's blissfully let it happen, and she then says what about me? When do I matter? Aside from the work required of you in the NMMNG book, this issue will require you taking a hard look at your marriage; what have her complaints been over the years? Did you just yes dear her and ignore it? Or did you change things so that she felt heard?


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## DoF (Mar 27, 2014)

Does it even matter if she is cheating or not? Seriously

If she doesn't love him, relationship is over. Cheating or not.

Seems like that would be just taking the focus off what needs to be answered/confirmed.


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## DoF (Mar 27, 2014)

turnera said:


> Read NMMNG before you do anything.
> 
> That said, many women DO just give up and leave marriages; but that's usually because the husband has taken the marriage for granted, she's done the bulk of carrying the marriage and family, and he's blissfully let it happen, and she then says what about me? When do I matter? Aside from the work required of you in the NMMNG book, this issue will require you taking a hard look at your marriage; what have her complaints been over the years? Did you just yes dear her and ignore it? Or did you change things so that she felt heard?


I'm going to assume this level of negligence has taken it's toll on this marriage already.

OP just needs to confirm it and see if there is ANY room for "working on it/improving".

Chances are high it's already too late.


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## Hicks (Jan 14, 2011)

Stop taking 100% of the blame.
You did what you thougth was right, and it turned out to be wrong.
You spent 5 years trying to right the wrongs. You are not perfect, no one is. The dynamic where you are 100% to blame is holding you back. You can never be perfect therefore you will always be the bad guy.


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## JDP (Sep 30, 2014)

turnera said:


> Read NMMNG before you do anything.
> 
> That said, many women DO just give up and leave marriages; but that's usually because the husband has taken the marriage for granted, she's done the bulk of carrying the marriage and family, and he's blissfully let it happen, and she then says what about me? When do I matter? Aside from the work required of you in the NMMNG book, this issue will require you taking a hard look at your marriage; what have her complaints been over the years? Did you just yes dear her and ignore it? Or did you change things so that she felt heard?


Her complaints are pretty basic if you see it broke fix it if its left out put it away if the dish washer needs to be emptied then empty it The biggest complaint was I smoked Day 16 BTW  I accomplished what she asked because I want the change I don't mind the change 
I kept telling he its about the small things

She had really bad feet issues with all of the running she did I bought an Elliptical and for 2 months I gave he hot oil foot massage I bought her a nice water bottle and then I started to get her water every morning then I started to put ice in it I would on impulse buy flowers I would hold the door open I would reach out to her and hold her hand I would hide quick little love notes..... Then about 6 months ago she say those things are nice but (with a sigh and shrugged shoulders) But I really don't need those things....... Ugh! 
So for the past 5 years or so no I have not neglected her I have not been on auto pilot 
I say stupid crap like when she says I will try to show you some affection and I said great you might try but I do....... Cant seem to shut the pie hole


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

JDP said:


> I accomplished what she asked because I want the change I don't mind the change
> I kept telling he its about the small things


How many years did you NOT accomplish what she asked?


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

JDP said:


> I gave her hot oil foot massage I bought her a nice water bottle and then I started to get her water every morning then I started to put ice in it I would on impulse buy flowers I would hold the door open I would reach out to her and hold her hand I would hide quick little love notes..... Then about 6 months ago she say those things are nice but (with a sigh and shrugged shoulders) But I really don't need those things


It sounds almost like a compulsion for you. You do something, don't get the response so you ramp it up and do more, still don't get the response, so ramp it up more, still don't get the response, so ramp it up more...all the while what you are doing isn't what SHE wanted. Sounds like SHE wanted you to be an equal partner in taking care of the HOUSE, not her.


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## JDP (Sep 30, 2014)

turnera said:


> How many years did you NOT accomplish what she asked?


about 12 but I was not 100% ignoring her during those years we had good days/weeks/years but I was working 12-16 hour days slept with the phone on my chest because of all the issues...... But I cant say I was 100% absorbed into my work and not the family I was engaged but not enough to keep this from happening


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

So for 12+ years you've been leaning on her to take care of everything and expecting her to follow around behind you and be your servant...and now you AREN'T doing that, and you just expect her to get over it already? Doesn't work that way. She doesn't trust it's real. You've probably promised before to change, did it for a few days and then were back to letting her do all the work. 

So she has no reason to trust you. It would take you a full 6 months to a year for her to believe you really 'get' it and are now a full partner and not expecting it all from her just because she's the woman. You up to it?

And it's not about ignoring her, from what I read. It's about you ASSUMING that YOUR position in the marriage granted you the power to do less work. Unless I'm reading this wrong. Obviously, paying attention to her (foot rubs, flowers, etc.) isn't what she wanted from you.


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## JDP (Sep 30, 2014)

turnera said:


> It sounds almost like a compulsion for you. You do something, don't get the response so you ramp it up and do more, still don't get the response, so ramp it up more, still don't get the response, so ramp it up more...all the while what you are doing isn't what SHE wanted. Sounds like SHE wanted you to be an equal partner in taking care of the HOUSE, not her.


Im not sure, but yes I fully understand that she wanted a partner and that is what I believe that I have become


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## JDP (Sep 30, 2014)

turnera said:


> So for 12+ years you've been leaning on her to take care of everything and expecting her to follow around behind you and be your servant...and now you AREN'T doing that, and you just expect her to get over it already? Doesn't work that way. She doesn't trust it's real. You've probably promised before to change, did it for a few days and then were back to letting her do all the work.
> 
> So she has no reason to trust you. It would take you a full 6 months to a year for her to believe you really 'get' it and are now a full partner and not expecting it all from her just because she's the woman. You up to it?
> 
> And it's not about ignoring her, from what I read. It's about you ASSUMING that YOUR position in the marriage granted you the power to do less work. Unless I'm reading this wrong. Obviously, paying attention to her (foot rubs, flowers, etc.) isn't what she wanted from you.


Yes but I have been doing this now for 5 years (not 100%) but always working towards being a partner 
I am willing to do whatever it takes 
Yes I get it she suffered through 12 years I'm not sure that its a tit for tat kind of scenario


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

No, it's not that, it's that she lost faith in you. She built up resentment. Your Love Busters poked so many holes in her 'love bucket' that no matter what good things you tried to do, she was so full of disappointment and resentment that it no longer mattered, that 'love' you tried to pour into her bucket just kept right on flowing right back out through all those holes, leaving an empty love bucket. Those holes take a LONG time to heal up; women are very slow to trust again.


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## Blossom Leigh (Mar 27, 2014)

JDP said:


> about 12 but I was not 100% ignoring her during those years we had good days/weeks/years but I was working 12-16 hour days slept with the phone on my chest because of all the issues...... But I cant say I was 100% absorbed into my work and not the family I was engaged but not enough to keep this from happening


Seems like work was your mistress.... does that resonate?


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## Blossom Leigh (Mar 27, 2014)

turnera said:


> No, it's not that, it's that she lost faith in you. She built up resentment. Your Love Busters poked so many holes in her 'love bucket' that no matter what good things you tried to do, she was so full of disappointment and resentment that it no longer mattered, that 'love' you tried to pour into her bucket just kept right on flowing right back out through all those holes, leaving an empty love bucket. Those holes take a LONG time to heal up; women are very slow to trust again.


This is very much my ex... EVERYTHING was his mistress, friends, big boy toys, neighbors, work. So, I have walked your wife's shoes. Later he wanted to pork three of my friends. It had no end.


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## JDP (Sep 30, 2014)

Blossom Leigh said:


> This is very much my ex... EVERYTHING was his mistress, friends, big boy toys, neighbors, work. So, I have walked your wife's shoes. Later he wanted to pork three of my friends. It had no end.


Okay lets set this straight NO I have nothing to hide on this forum and the answer is still NO she is the love of my life period I have injured her and I am willing to do what I can to heal have I had chances have I been tempted you bet I have but My love for family and my fear of God kept my sanity in check period (little offend)


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## Blossom Leigh (Mar 27, 2014)

Didn't mean to offend. Just sounds very familiar.


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## JDP (Sep 30, 2014)

Blossom Leigh said:


> Didn't mean to offend. Just sounds very familiar.


Ok not taken 

The one thing that I know I am is faithful (extra marital) 
I am sorry that your H did that to you and I am facing the possibility that that she maybe, however it does not give me the green light to do the same if true it means I have a choice just as I did when I sold my business I came to the understanding that I was Fing up and I needed to change I was just too late (or I hope so) 
I will pray for you and I am sorry that you went through what he did to you


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## Blossom Leigh (Mar 27, 2014)

Its ok... strong woman now.

Its good you are searching for the wide path in the water to turn your ship around.


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## JDP (Sep 30, 2014)

Blossom Leigh said:


> Its ok... strong woman now.
> 
> Its good you are searching for the wide path in the water to turn your ship around.


Thanks some would say its the narrow path but it sucks either way and I know its going to be hard


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## Blossom Leigh (Mar 27, 2014)

Yes, but worth it.


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