# Attracted to shyish girls with depression???



## brendan (Jun 1, 2011)

Well heres my story. 

My first girlfriend when i was 16 was a cute shy girl and we lasted a year, half way through our relationship she told me she was diagnosed with depression when she was 15.

My second girlfriend when i was 18, was not shy but very bubbly but a few months into the relationship found out she also had depression for about 2 years and had downers. We lasted 7 months

When i was 19 i had a cute 17 year old girlfriend and you guessed it a few months in she also said she has battled with depression since she was 14. She was sorta wild though and we lasted 7 fun months. 

After we split up i joked with my uni teacher at the time and said all three girls ive dated have been great but have had depression. She then told me she was studying to be a life coach and offered me a session. I said ok and after our talk she said my personality was attracted to girls like that, but as i said "I didnt know they had depression before i started dating them"

A year later i went out with a girl for 14 months and 2 months in she told me she had no parents and witnessed there death and has depression. It was pretty bad but she was lovely. Again i didnt know the first few weeks.

Then the girl i married, 6 months into our realtionship also revealed she had depression in her teen years. Anyhow i didnt really see any evidence until 4 years later a few weeks after we actually married, her depression came back real bad and we split up and ended our marriage 14 months later. I blame a lot of it on her depression.

So 10 months on i decide to start dating again and met a smart lovely girl, a few months in find she has anxiety and sufferes a little from hypocondriac, then told me she had an abortion at 15 and had depression on and off. FUCCCCK. ANyway we parted a month ago as i met someone else...

This girl is a lot younger than me but we get along so well and have just about spent everynight together for a six weeks. I am 30, she is 20. It just happened. She actually split up with her boyfriend of 4 years for me which was a concern. Now a week ago she really opens up to me and tells me she goes to a physchologist once a month and is on pills for depression. She then tells me about her family and dear me, she has had a tough tough up bringing.....again i didnt know this for the first few weeks.


How do i always fall for girls who have or have had depression??? After i seperated with my wife i said to myself i would never date a girl with depression again. But again six weeks into this girl i am real happy and dont want to let her go but fear this depression bull**** again....


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## Wiltshireman (Jan 23, 2013)

brendan,

You refer to half a dozen girls / women that you have dated all of whom have had problems with depression. If this is an accurate reflection of your dating history (have you had other successful relationships?) then you have my sympathy.

A couple of things strike me about your history.

You seem to jump quickly from one failed relationship straight into your next.

You must be (if only subconsciously) preselecting partners with personality types that are prone to depression.

Having said that the numbers of people with mental disorders is frightening (1 in 4 in any given year in the US).

NIMH · The Numbers Count: Mental Disorders in America


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