# Camera in the Bedroom?



## Cam4hire (Oct 18, 2015)

Hello everyone! I am new but had a question about a few things. Im sure there are many of you out there that have made a sex tape with your significant other(or maybe you haven't). What are the best ways of approaching this topic with the wife? I am into photography and videography and when I try to bring that into the bed room to spice things up she becomes very quiet and shy(which I can understand). Ive already told her that if she is not comfortable doing it then I will let it go but she is open to doing it every now and then. I'm trying to go very slow with it so she will open up more but just wanted to get some advice on how to make her more comfortable. Thanks for the advice! 

:smile2:


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## ThePheonix (Jan 3, 2013)

Maybe if you shared a video with some of us we could evaluate it and explain to your wife its not a big deal. >


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## Cam4hire (Oct 18, 2015)

LMAO. See I knew it was a good idea to create an account here. I would have never thought of that on my own!! Ill be sending it out right away. ....


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Don't be surprised if she does not go along with it. A lot of women know better because for some reason these sorts of videos often end up shared and/or on the internet.

I was married to a guy who had some pictures from a previous relationship.. he caught him sharing them with friends. I learned the lesson. Never, ever.


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## jb02157 (Apr 16, 2014)

I'm a little skeptical of this. What happens if the tapes get into the wrong hands: kids, parents, prospective employers? Also what happens to the tapes when the relationship goes sour, the one who has the tapes could threaten to make them available to the wrong people. It's just a bad idea.


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## Cam4hire (Oct 18, 2015)

I can definitely see how people would be skeptical of this. More so Im looking for some advice on how to get the wifey more comfortable in front of the camera. I'm finishing up a Bachelors in Computer Security so I definitely understand the risks. With that I have also learned how to mitigate the risks. I'm not going to go into encryption techniques and such that I use (I understand this inst an end all be all but there are ways to protect your videos). Thanks for the replies so far but has anyone had a similar experience or dabble in the same bedroom activities?

EleGirl - Sorry that happened. Its such a fun thing to do with someone you care about as well. Sorry it was ruined for ya. 

jb02157 - Well, what happens is people get an up and close shot of us getting down!! You're right, there are risks. Everyone has their own type of risk they are willing to take in order to enjoy this short life!!


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

This depends on how long you've been married and how connected your marriage is. Have you ever broken a promise to her, let her down in a significant way, challenged her out of her comfort zone and she didn't like the results? All of these should be her inner alarm bells NOT to do this.

We've made a few. I think I suggested he film his favorite activity so he could take it with him on a road trip. I think he suggested the subsequent sessions. One of the things that made me comfortable about making them was that he was the one who was very concerned that these films are only ever seen by us. We decided on a way to ensure it after doing some research. The first few attempts were laughably bad, neither of us have photography skills. We viewed them, deleted them made another attempt. What made me so comfortable was that we agreed what should be seen and what should not be seen. So as we made them and deleted them, it became less threatening or frightening. In only one video was my face seen and I was okay with it. All of the others could be anyone.


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## MarriedDude (Jun 21, 2014)

Pretty much any woman that has heard of Pink-Meth would be seriously averse to pictures and video.

Pretty risky biz
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

An easy way is to allow her to be the one to control the camera and possess the resulting file. Tell her you just want to watch it together once and then allow her to delete it. 

This will allow you to explore but for her to be in control, you can compliment her, and based on that take it from there if it will be something to add to your relationship or not.

Badsanta


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## sapientia (Nov 24, 2012)

What's the attraction for you to do this? Do you want to review your wife when she isn't around? Do you like the fact she is uncomfortable with it?


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## sapientia (Nov 24, 2012)

badsanta said:


> An easy way is to allow her to be the one to control the camera and possess the resulting file. Tell her you just want to watch it together once and then allow her to delete it.


This^ is your best advice.


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## Cam4hire (Oct 18, 2015)

badsanta - I think that is a good idea. Something I have considered but will definitely try next time. 

Anon - Thanks for the input and real experience. Exactly what I was looking for. 

The deleting after a few days or soon after is a good idea. Keeps things fresh!!


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## john117 (May 20, 2013)

Start with stills only, not video, and slowly move up to video. Likewise start small in terms of action then ramp up. Also try a hotel or other neutral territory.

Finally save on a storage device where two passwords are needed - or set a password where you know one part and she knows one. Or combination lock and key plus password. Uncontrolled files have a tendency to find themselves out in public...


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## Angel82 (Sep 7, 2015)

My husband suggested this a few days ago. I laughed it off but god i hope he wasnt serious. I cant even imagine how awful ot would be to watch.


Good luck.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## 6301 (May 11, 2013)

Friend of cousin bought a camcorder when they first came out and he wanted to tape their time in bed and she wasn't to keen on the idea because she was afraid if someone got a hold of the tape then it's big time trouble so what they did at first was set the camcorder up and use the TV as the monitor so they can see themselves but with no tape running. It satisfied his desire to see them having sex. Problem was that it got old and he wanted to tape it and she asked him one day if he wanted a wife he could be proud of or a porn star. 

She finally gave in and they made a few and one day he broached the subject of bringing another guy in and he could tape her with another guy. It went too far and their now divorced so my advice is this. If she's even a tiny bit unsure then leave it alone and be happy.

Honestly I don't know if I would want to see my naked ass in a video LOL


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## badsanta (Oct 13, 2014)

Angel82 said:


> My husband suggested this a few days ago. I laughed it off but god i hope he wasnt serious. *I cant even imagine how awful* ot would be to watch.
> 
> 
> Good luck.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_




@Cam4hire Pay attention to this response. Angel82's response is interesting because she associates video with "sexual disgust" for something that should otherwise be beautiful. There should be nothing wrong with a couple watching a video of themselves making love as long as the intentions of the video are used exclusively for sensual and caring exploration within the relationship. 

If your wife reacts this way, it is likely she will have a strong disposition against all sexual videos being related to something akin to prostitution, infidelity, and/or sexual violence. If you and your wife have had arguments over using pornography in the relationship then she will likely see your attempt to make her sexual acts into video porn as something she feels threatened by in that context. 

OR she has issues with her self confidence and fears that the camera will "add 10 pounds" so to speak and can not bring herself to look at herself. 

If this is the case, you need to focus on *why* she feels sexual disgust towards sexual videos and try to resolve that before making the video. Otherwise she could feel you are attacking and/or attempting to defile her sexuality. 

Only do it once she agrees it is something that should be beautiful. 

Regards,
Badsanta


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## Bibi1031 (Sep 14, 2015)

I have done a few. I did about 5 with first XH. He enjoyed watching us. I didn't care too much for them. I would rather do than watch.:grin2:

With 2nd XH I did 2. On one of them I did a strip tease. He loved it, but I never did a strip tease again. The music was "nasty, naughty boy" by Christina Aguilera. 

It was fun doing them. I came up with the idea. They enjoyed the ride. I did it. Got it out of my system, and don't care for it again.

Now that I think about it, I have no idea what happened to the videos.

Bibi


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## Cletus (Apr 27, 2012)

Angel82 said:


> My husband suggested this a few days ago. I laughed it off but god i hope he wasnt serious. I cant even imagine how awful ot would be to watch.


That's my wife's position too. I don't get it. If it was awesome to do, how could it be awful to watch?


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## john117 (May 20, 2013)

Cletus said:


> That's my wife's position too. I don't get it. If it was awesome to do, how could it be awful to watch?



Because most of us don't look like what we think we look like 

Think un photoshopped photography of normal people. With good lighting and scene selection etc it looks decent. Now take out lighting (most common mortals don't have studio lighting in their gear), single point of view filming (3 is a crowd ) and ho hum video capabilities and you aren't shooting the next masterpiece any time soon.

Solo shooting is not difficult but automated / tripod... Meh.


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## norajane (Feb 7, 2012)

Keep reminding her during the sessions how hot and sexy she is, how turned on you are. Make sure she is really turned on before you bring cameras into it.

Don't focus on the pics or filming so much - focus on her.

Don't bring cameras into every encounter, nor necessarily for the entire encounter. 

It gets boring after a while, both during an encounter and after multiple encounters, so if she wants to stop, stop. She isn't a porn star, so don't treat your bedroom like a porn set. You don't need it every time or often. Just once in a while to spice things up.


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## Angel82 (Sep 7, 2015)

badsanta said:


> @Cam4hire Pay attention to this response. Angel82's response is interesting because she associates video with "sexual disgust" for something that should otherwise be beautiful. There should be nothing wrong with a couple watching a video of themselves making love as long as the intentions of the video are used exclusively for sensual and caring exploration within the relationship.
> 
> If your wife reacts this way, it is likely she will have a strong disposition against all sexual videos being related to something akin to prostitution, infidelity, and/or sexual violence. If you and your wife have had arguments over using pornography in the relationship then she will likely see your attempt to make her sexual acts into video porn as something she feels threatened by in that context.
> 
> ...





Cletus said:


> That's my wife's position too. I don't get it. If it was awesome to do, how could it be awful to watch?


In fairness. I am not every woman and i have body issues and have some issues to work out with my husband as he was using porn during some of our marriage so the last thing i would want is to do somethig like this with him at this present time. Maybe down the line when things are better between us as we are still on thin ice
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## UMP (Dec 23, 2014)

john117 said:


> Because most of us don't look like what we think we look like
> 
> Think un photoshopped photography of normal people. With good lighting and scene selection etc it looks decent. Now take out lighting (most common mortals don't have studio lighting in their gear), single point of view filming (3 is a crowd ) and ho hum video capabilities and you aren't shooting the next masterpiece any time soon.
> 
> Solo shooting is not difficult but automated / tripod... Meh.


Night vision camera is best and no lighting needed. Also takes all those "blemishes" out of the equation. The black and white look is deviant in and of itself. Win-win.


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## Bibi1031 (Sep 14, 2015)

norajane said:


> Don't focus on the pics or filming so much - focus on her.
> 
> Don't bring cameras into every encounter, nor necessarily for the entire encounter.
> 
> It gets boring after a while, both during an encounter and after multiple encounters, so if she wants to stop, stop. She isn't a porn star, so don't treat your bedroom like a porn set. You don't need it every time or often. Just once in a while to spice things up.


Great post! 

Keep the videos short. 6 minutes max. Focus on the whole woman, not just the magic V and surrounding areas. Lots of foreplay with sexy texts, phone calls, a long bath and helping her shave them private parts to look really sexy for the encounter. These sessions require planning. It's not spontaneous. Ask about lingerie, or provide it. Make it special. You need to dress for the part too. 

Bibi


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## kimberp75 (Oct 19, 2015)

We are our own worst critics. I would suggest maybe using a Webcam first. That way it is stationary, you both can focus more on one another rather than the camera itself, as well as having the option to glance over at the screen and seeing yourselves during the act. 

Communicate as you have been, with lots of positive reassurance. And in the meantime, watch lots of porn together, allowing her to pick the genre or videos in particular. I think she'll open up more to the idea over time. At least you didn't get a straight up "NO". Hope it works out and she one day realizes how much fun it is and a turn on it can be.


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## norajane (Feb 7, 2012)

I don't know about watching more porn together. It's not going to make her feel any better about her body, if she has body issues.

Instead, I'd suggest having sex in front of a mirror before you start with the cameras. Encourage her to SEE how sexy she is and show her what YOU see when you're having sex and how turned on she makes you feel. For her to enjoy cameras, she needs to tap into the eroticism of it, not the mechanics.


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## gouge_away (Apr 7, 2015)

I would ask her if she would like to be in control of the photography. See if she will send you some revealing pictures, tell her its OK if she doesn't want to expose what she isn't comfortable exposing, maybe she will tease you a bit.


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## sapientia (Nov 24, 2012)

I notice the OP didn't answer *why* he wants to do this, however.


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## cosquin (Sep 16, 2014)

sapientia said:


> I notice the OP didn't answer *why* he wants to do this, however.


Why? So simple: it is just lust


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## 2ndchanceGuy (Sep 28, 2015)

UMP said:


> Night vision camera is best and no lighting needed. Also takes all those "blemishes" out of the equation. The black and white look is deviant in and of itself. Win-win.


Night vision, ( infra red ) may take out blemishes but faces/ eyes look down right freaky. Kind of zombie like. 
I wouldn't suggest for a first timer. 
I've never done a sex tape but have a IR camera in my yard for surveillance.


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## Cam4hire (Oct 18, 2015)

sapientia said:


> I notice the OP didn't answer *why* he wants to do this, however.




sapientia - No I did not respond. Thanks for noticing. I would however appreciate any constructive feedback. Your question I felt was not constructive. I am very appreciative of everyone that provided feedback. 

Thanks everyone. Very good points and some things I never even thought about.


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## Yeswecan (Jul 25, 2014)

My W did the video thing. After watching it my W said she envisioned herself as more sexy. Oh well, I guess we all get a mental picture in our minds. Heck, I look like Zeus during sex. :grin2::surprise:

Anyway, perhaps your W is self conscientious on her looks and feels a vid would some how confirm her suspicions. Just a guess on my part due to my W comment about herself when watching.

Anyway, the vid was deleted. It think there is a Super 8 of us somewhere. I'm dating myself now. :wink2:


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## Fozzy (Jul 20, 2013)

Avoid low angle shots. Dangle-ball shots are the worst!


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## Cam4hire (Oct 18, 2015)

HA HA. Yes dangle ball shots are not pleasing to the eye. I dabble in videography and luckily have nice equipment. Even with proper lighting and a semi-pro cam the dangle balls are no good. 

Self image is something I feel we all struggle with. Some more than others. Ill keep all of this advice in mind. I am trying to slow play it as some of you stated. I could see it not being fun if you try doing it every session.


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