# Guys, do you know any men that go for primarily younger women?



## DanaS (May 28, 2014)

You always hear how older men want younger women because for whatever reasons they don't find women their age attractive, but in your experience how often have you seen it where an older man, say 40+ primarily, if not exclusively went for younger women, say 10+ years younger?

Now I know I am married to a younger man so I am not meaning this in a mean or judgmental way, just curious how often it does really happen.


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## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

DanaS said:


> You always hear how older men want younger women because for whatever reasons they don't find women their age attractive, but in your experience how often have you seen it where an older man, say 40+ primarily, if not exclusively went for younger women, say 10+ years younger?
> 
> Now I know I am married to a younger man so I am not meaning this in a mean or judgmental way, just curious how often it does really happen.


I would say that of the guys I know they have all attached to women their same age or younger...never older. Now younger by more than 10 years hasn't been the norm I have seen. But a year to 5 is very common, 5-10 less so...

With the exception of one guy who will tell you flat out he only dates 20 year old hotties the rest dating younger is not about looks. It's about availability and their attitude most of all.


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## Constable Odo (Feb 14, 2015)

Well when I started dating I certainly didn't date "younger" women by a long stretch (heck I was 16 lol)... but, as I got older, the acceptable age range I found increased.

When I divorced at 38, I found the "sweet spot" for dating women to be between 28 and 33. It was those ages I found most of the women I interacted with to be at the same maturity level as I found myself at.

Even today, I find the "sweet spot" for myself to be about 10 years difference. I'm attracted to, and seem to have the same maturity level, interests, etc. as a woman that is 10 years my junior.

My current SO is 16 years my junior, but she's extremely well refined and educated, so she 'projects' herself as being significantly older than she is, even though she looks like she's 18, thanks to long, lustrous hair halfway down her back, and a glowing complexion which exudes fertility. My endocrine system can't resist her.

I wouldn't say that I find women "my age" unattractive... but, frankly, most of them are. Either they've let themselves go physically, or they have shed all aspects of their femininity as they've started that slow decline into "matronly" status; or worse yet, they have some type of emotional hangups or baggage which make them a drag. Certainly, there are some women in my age bracket who I find attractive, but generally there's an additional adjective assigned to them which makes them unavailable: "married".


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

Younger women are attracted to me but not so much the reverse.

Admittedly, since reaching my forties, women ten years younger are much more attractive to me than they use to be.

Physically, women in their twenties are hot but they have always struck me as too immature.

Women in their thirties on up do turn my head.

I married a woman eleven years my senior. 

I obviously find older women attractive. LOL!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Lionelhutz (Feb 2, 2012)

When I was in my late 20s I have a relationship with a woman in her late 40s. But in general, I tend not to take "rules" about attraction too seriously since always find exceptions. In general I am most attracted to women around my age. (40 something) But since I am married that is just at the level of observer and usually married women. But the problem I do see with women in their 40s, is mostly about circumstance since at this age life's stressors tend to be at their worse. But I have always liked a woman who is not afraid of her own sexual shadow, and has her own sexual agenda so that normally means older. 

I have a single friend who spent most of his adult life dating much younger women but then suddenly did an about face and seems only attracted to women close to his age (late 40s). Even though women of all ages tend to seek him out. When I talk to him about it, it almost sounds like he thinks is it suddenly inappropriate and he says he finds women in their 20s irritating. Of course as a good friend, I just tell him he has officially become a grumpy old man and too old for sex anyways.


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## Dread Pirate Roberts (May 22, 2012)

DanaS said:


> You always hear how older men want younger women because for whatever reasons they don't find women their age attractive, but in your experience how often have you seen it where an older man, say 40+ primarily, if not exclusively went for younger women, say 10+ years younger?
> 
> Now I know I am married to a younger man so I am not meaning this in a mean or judgmental way, just curious how often it does really happen.


My roomie did this, up until about a year ago. He's early fifties, and always dated way younger - he was living with a 30 year old last year. He was upfront about it - it's just what he's attracted to. After they split, his next relationship was with a 47 year old; we were laughing about it actually, because it was such a change for him. His current girlfriend is also in her 40s, so he appears to have grown out of it.

As for me, I was married most of my adult life to a woman within one year of me. When I started dating after D, the women were right around my age. My gf is 5 years younger than me.

DPR


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## pragmaster (May 7, 2014)

My ex-wife was 6 years older. I'm 26 next week. 

I pretty much just take everything I can get and it seems to be I like women 20-25, before they are "damaged" as my friend says.


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## Bob Davis (Nov 5, 2014)

As "around" 60 my opinion likely doesn't matter much anymore. But I always found myself attracted to women of my same age. When I was 20 I thought those were the cutest girls and 30 YO looked so old. Later, those 30 YO looked best. Later, the 40 YO looked best. Now I work with some young women in 20's and they look like junior high school kids to me. My wife is 10 years my junior and looks great to me.


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## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

The man I'm seeing married young, and divorced at age 35. After that, he spent over 10 years dating younger women. His last long-term relationship was with a woman 12 years his junior, but he'd dated plenty younger than that. Then, about 5 years ago, he got sober and started growing up (in his words). As he describes it, now that he's a functional adult who is at least marginally as mature as his age would indicate, the sweet young things don't do it for him. They make him feel very old, and a little creepy. Personally, I think having teen daughters has probably contributed to his distaste for 20-something partners. In the last 4 years, he's dated women within 3 years of his own age - both younger and older. I'm the exception, at 10 years his junior.


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

There are undoubtedly a modest percentage of men who only try to date much younger women, and some are successful, obviously. Just as some men prefer older women. There are always modest numbers of people in the tails of the normal distribution curve, but the large majority fall in the middle range of less than 10 years age difference.

I've dated a little older to much younger, but my best matches all seemed to fall within 10 years of my age. Love may not be deterred by an age difference, but after a decade or so, may be strained by the increasingly obvious differences in appearance and vitality.


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## melw74 (Dec 12, 2013)

My husband is 60 hes 61 this year and i am 39 this year. Before me he was with someone who was his own age and his first wife was a girl who was in his class at school. First wife who was with for 14 years married for 7 was having an affair and then left him for another man. Shes married to the other man now The last before he met me he was with 18 years and just fell out of love with him and told him to leave ( he thinks she was also seeing someone) then he met me.

So it was not like just goes for younger women as i am of course the youngest hes been with. He fell in love with me for me the person i am just like i fell in love with him because of the person he is.


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

I'm 41 and hb is almost 60. His ex wife was within a few years of him and after their divorce he dated younger women, and I think I'm the youngest. We met when I was 31 and he was 50.

My ex hb was 4 years older then me. 

We hit it off really well, he says I'm an older woman in a younger woman's body. .... that's probably true as I've seldom buddied around with my peers. That includes women friends. Now that I'm a little older I seem to have more women friends my age, now that they've grown up.

I like older men.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## coffee4me (Feb 6, 2013)

DanaS said:


> You always hear how older men want younger women because for whatever reasons they don't find women their age attractive, but in your experience how often have you seen it where an older man, say 40+ primarily, if not exclusively went for younger women, say 10+ years younger?
> 
> Now I know I am married to a younger man so I am not meaning this in a mean or judgmental way, just curious how often it does really happen.


I hear about this all the time from my group of friends; we are all around 50. My friends are on various OLD sites. Their typical messages are from men in the 60-65 age range. They read many profiles where men in their 50's are looking for a woman 35-45. Many of them feel that men their age only want women 5-10+ years younger. They feel the flip side of the 60-65 year old men that they are too old and prefer men 50-58 yr old. . It's frustrating for them and seems to be typical of OLD. 

I see it here on TAM as well when a guy gets screwed over the advice is he should get a YOUNGER, hotter woman.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

My dad can be what you may call, a "dirty old man", 20+ years younger


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## Cleigh (Dec 5, 2013)

An older male friend of my partner is looking for a young woman. Part of it is for the attraction side but mainly because he wants his own family and he doesn't want her to already have kids. I say good luck to him but can't see that happening for anyone in this country. He would need to fly someone over who wants a new life and support and is willing to give him a child.


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## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

coffee4me said:


> I hear about this all the time from my group of friends; we are all around 50. My friends are on various OLD sites. Their typical messages are from men in the 60-65 age range. They read many profiles where men in their 50's are looking for a woman 35-45. Many of them feel that men their age only want women 5-10+ years younger. They feel the flip side of the 60-65 year old men that they are too old and prefer men 50-58 yr old. . It's frustrating for them and seems to be typical of OLD.


I run into this with online dating as well. I'm 38. I get a _lot_ of interest from men in the 55+ age range. That's personally outside my comfort range, and outside my profile's stated preferences. About 10 years older than me is about all I'm willing to tackle.


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

I'm sure it is more common than not. Two of my best friends married women a lot younger. One by ten years, the other by about twenty.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## TheGoodGuy (Apr 22, 2013)

For me it's more about maturity level than the number. I want someone who has "lived some real life", and I've lived a hard fought 34 years. So while my dating profile is anyone between 27-40, it would have to be a very mature 27 year old to really peak my interest.


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## Blossom Leigh (Mar 27, 2014)

My ex was ten years older than me. I was 20 and he was 30 when we met, stayed together 17 years. My current husband is five years younger than me and at the age of 45 this year I can say that in the last three years I have been hit on by men as young as 27 and as old as 54, so a very wide range. Didn't see a clear pattern.


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## ThePheonix (Jan 3, 2013)

This sounds about as politically incorrect as it gets but its reality. At 68 I'm older than most and married a 9 year younger chick 20 years ago. Now you tell me, would the typical mid-late 60 year old male rather be married to a woman 9-10 years younger or 9-10 years older than himself.


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## melw74 (Dec 12, 2013)

ThePheonix said:


> This sounds about as politically incorrect as it gets but its reality. At 68 I'm older than most and married a 9 year younger chick 20 years ago. Now you tell me, would the typical mid-late 60 year old male rather be married to a woman 9-10 years younger or 9-10 years older than himself.


I am not saying it does not make a man feel good being married to a younger woman because then i would be lying. I think it must be good to any mans ego if hes with a woman say 22 years younger:wink2:.... it is for mine, that does not mean he looks at me as a trophy wife etc, but of course it makes him feel good.

I remember when we first met. We was with mutual friends, and i never really liked him to be honest. I thought he was loud and obnoxious if i am honest, he was with a male friend of mine they had been for drinks he was always cracking jokes and it got my back up... What i did not know then was the woman he was with for 18 years had ended their relationship and he was just putting on a front really, but it still annoyed me, and i told this other friend to think about bringing him out again if he acted like that.... jokey etc.

Well i am glad he did because the more i saw him the more i liked what i saw and the hate turned into love:x.... I became infatuated with him lol the true him came out and could not get enough of him.. He could not believe i was even interested in him as he said to me that he could not believe a woman my age would even been interested in him or even look at him?? all his other girlfriends had been his age and he never really thought about being with someone my age, so when i started to flirt with him etc he was quite taken aback, not sure he could take me playing footsie with him under the table at a card game:laugh:.

Hes always complementing me telling me how lucky that hot bit of stuff his married to him, so not saying that sometimes it does not go to his head lol.... Then again its me that always thinks how lucky i am to have him so it works both ways.


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## Constable Odo (Feb 14, 2015)

melw74 said:


> I am not saying it does not make a man feel good being married to a younger woman because then i would be lying.


Although my SO and I joke a bit about our age difference (for example, I tell her the only thing I bring to our relationship is my AARP family membership), she doesn't make me feel good because of her age... she makes me feel good because of who she is, the ways she compliments my life, and the value she brings to my everyday existence. Her age really is irrelevant in this equation, if she were the same person, 20 years older, or 10 years younger, I'd feel the same way.


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## melw74 (Dec 12, 2013)

Constable Odo said:


> Although my SO and I joke a bit about our age difference (for example, I tell her the only thing I bring to our relationship is my AARP family membership), she doesn't make me feel good because of her age... she makes me feel good because of who she is, the ways she compliments my life, and the value she brings to my everyday existence. Her age really is irrelevant in this equation, if she were the same person, 20 years older, or 10 years younger, I'd feel the same way.


This is really nice. I love this. Sounds like you have a lovely wife. The same goes for me. I love my husband so much for who he is. Hes such a lovely loving man, and like you no matter if he was younger or older i would still love him and feel the same.

Its funny, but we have the same interests and we get on so well and i do believe hes my soul mate.


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

Rowan said:


> I run into this with online dating as well. I'm 38. I get a _lot_ of interest from men in the 55+ age range. That's personally outside my comfort range, and outside my profile's stated preferences. About 10 years older than me is about all I'm willing to tackle.



The problem with OLD is that you can't make a human connection so it turns into a shopping experience where one imagines they can order what they want. 

If I'd just seen my hb's profile I'd have felt the same way, that it was way outside my comfort zone. But we had a connection in person. 

What does surprise me though is what some of these guys on old imagine they can get. I know someone in his mid 50's who imagines he's going to get 25-30 year old hotties simply because he has a good job. Not attractive at all, of course he gets messages from scam artists and young women who are not great looking and have kids they need help supporting which isn't what he wants. As you can imagine he's been unsuccessful. He's a good friend so I've tried to gently tell him that he's not going to get what he wants, but he's stuck in the fantasy that he's still a lot younger.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## EllisRedding (Apr 10, 2015)

I would say many of the guys I know where there is a significant age difference with their spouse, it is typically the wife that is much younger. My wife is 2 months older than me, and I do remind her of this frequently :grin2:

Not that I ever plan on being back in the field, but if I was I would definitely be more drawn to younger women. Many of the women my age or older that I happen to see are already in full mommy mode, letting themselves go, etc... doesn't do anything for me from a physical standpoint.


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## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

lifeistooshort said:


> The problem with OLD is that you can't make a human connection so it turns into a shopping experience where one imagines they can order what they want.
> 
> If I'd just seen my hb's profile I'd have felt the same way, that it was way outside my comfort zone. But we had a connection in person.
> 
> ...


Really? At all? that's so surprising to hear. If you are an older guy and want younger women and asked me for advice on how to make that happen OLD would be the first place I would send him. When my guy friends from work come and ask for advice that is where I send them and they are wildly successful. Course I wouldn't describe them as "not attractive at all" but we also don't make a lot of money.

Is what makes him unattractive weight or has ne not aged well? If it's weight he could loose that. If it's aging maybe he just needs better pictures?


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

Wolf1974 said:


> Really? At all? that's so surprising to hear. If you are an older guy and want younger women and asked me for advice on how to make that happen OLD would be the first place I would send him. When my guy friends from work come and ask for advice that is where I send them and they are wildly successful. Course I wouldn't describe them as "not attractive at all" but we also don't make a lot of money.
> 
> Is what makes him unattractive weight or has ne not aged well? If it's weight he could loose that. If it's aging maybe he just needs better pictures?



No, he's not heavy. Just not particularly attractive. .... and he might be able to get someone a lot younger except that he wants the cream of the crop: 9's and 10's with no kids. Such women have a lot of options and besides a decent job he doesn't offer much to them.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## quiesedba (Apr 19, 2015)

It depends on what you are wanting.... I'm 48 and in very good shape... ..... I absolutely love younger women between the ages of 30 and 38.... older than that and they are usually too fat, wrinkly and desperate.... they know the looks are fading . Of course i would not be interested in marrying these women, just casual sex and fun.... if it was to get too serious time to move on...... 

Women get worse with age men tend to get better..... my wife is 43 and she starting to show some mileage , I am as well.... 

I have found that women 30-40 like men 10-15 older, as the men their age are still playing video games and jacking off.


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## coffee4me (Feb 6, 2013)

quiesedba said:


> women between the ages of 30 and 38.... older than that and they are usually too fat, wrinkly and desperate.... they know the looks are fading . .


That's harsh to read but at least you are honest and I think a lot of men generalize women by age like this.


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## Kristisha (Apr 29, 2013)

quiesedba said:


> It depends on what you are wanting.... I'm 48 and in very good shape... ..... I absolutely love younger women between the ages of 30 and 38.... older than that and they are usually too fat, wrinkly and desperate.... they know the looks are fading . Of course i would not be interested in marrying these women, just casual sex and fun.... if it was to get too serious time to move on......
> 
> Women get worse with age men tend to get better..... my wife is 43 and she starting to show some mileage , I am as well....
> 
> I have found that women 30-40 like men 10-15 older, as the men their age are still playing video games and jacking off.


*[/

I don't know what's with men and video games*


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## Kristisha (Apr 29, 2013)

coffee4me said:


> That's harsh to read but at least you are honest and I think a lot of men generalize women by age like this.


Like women generalise men by age:smile2:



By the way I love your avatar it's like my relantionship with coffee, totally obsessed with it


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## 2ntnuf (Jul 14, 2012)

> I have found that women 30-40 like men 10-15 older, as the men their age are still playing video games and jacking off.


You mean your supposed to stop at some age? But, I haven't gone blind yet. It's getting tough to see, though. >

I don't play video games. :laugh:


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

quiesedba said:


> It depends on what you are wanting.... I'm 48 and in very good shape... ..... I absolutely love younger women between the ages of 30 and 38.... older than that and they are usually too fat, wrinkly and desperate.... they know the looks are fading . Of course i would not be interested in marrying these women, just casual sex and fun.... if it was to get too serious time to move on......
> 
> Women get worse with age men tend to get better..... my wife is 43 and she starting to show some mileage , I am as well....
> 
> I have found that women 30-40 like men 10-15 older, as the men their age are still playing video games and jacking off.


I can't imagine why you're having so many issues in your marriage.

I mean... you're just so insightful and eloquent.


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

Fitnessfan said:


> Some of these answers surprise me as for some reason I just assumed that all or most men preferred younger women.


It will vary from one guy to the next, and will largely depend on where a given guy is in his life. For example...

Does he have children? If so, does he want more? If not, does he want children at all? Is he willing to be a stepfather?

Is he looking to marry or just to date?

How close is he to retirement age?

...and many, many other considerations.


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## Kristisha (Apr 29, 2013)

GusPolinski said:


> I can't imagine why you're having so many issues in your marriage.
> 
> I mean... you're just so insightful and eloquent.


That's what happens when someone wants out no matter what ( apart from the fact that he doesn't want to divide the assets ) ,it's becoming more and more interesting on the other side


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

coffee4me said:


> That's harsh to read but at least you are honest and I think a lot of men generalize women by age like this.


Many do. But many don't.


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## quiesedba (Apr 19, 2015)

GusPolinski said:


> I can't imagine why you're having so many issues in your marriage.
> 
> I mean... you're just so insightful and eloquent.


Gus, Gus,Gus........ I am not having problems in my marriage.... I would have to care to have a problem and the only thing I care about is how to hide the money.


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

GusPolinski said:


> I can't imagine why you're having so many issues in your marriage.
> 
> I mean... you're just so insightful and eloquent.


Right? Pretty high opinion of himself.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## MarriedDude (Jun 21, 2014)

My father has typically went after women that were 10 to 20+ years younger. He never has a problem finding them. Its the keeping them part he has yet to master. 

My wife is just shy of 3 years younger. Perfect for me. Young women are fun to look at....But when they talk -their banality and/or youthful ignorance (not their fault)- ruin the whole beauty effect.


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

MarriedDude said:


> My father has typically went after women that were 10 to 20+ years younger. He never has a problem finding them. Its the keeping them part he has yet to master.
> 
> My wife is just shy of 3 years younger. Perfect for me. Young women are fun to look at....But when they talk -their banality and/or youthful ignorance (not their fault)- ruin the whole beauty effect.


Ha ha, my father didn't want women less than 5 years his junior. He said he couldn't relate to them.

He never understood my marriage and how we could have anything in common with 19 years difference.


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

I hear that women age a lot faster when their H's are pathetic in bed.

Mrs. Conan just got scoped by a guy in his twenties at our gym. 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Kristisha (Apr 29, 2013)

lifeistooshort said:


> Ha ha, my father didn't want women less than 5 years his junior. He said he couldn't relate to them.
> 
> He never understood my marriage and how we could have anything in common with 19 years difference.


It's not for everyone but some people they just click and no number could keep them apart:wink2:


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## Kristisha (Apr 29, 2013)

ConanHub said:


> I hear that women age a lot faster when their H's are pathetic in bed.
> 
> Mrs. Conan just got scoped by a guy in his twenties at our gym.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


That says it all about you:grin2:


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

Kristisha said:


> That says it all about you:grin2:


A little tongue in cheek. My blood gets a little up when people start making crappy remarks about older women.

I'm married to one and she is a five foot bombshell with a heart of gold.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Kristisha (Apr 29, 2013)

ConanHub said:


> A little tongue in cheek. My blood gets a little up when people start making crappy remarks about older women.
> 
> I'm married to one and she is a five foot bombshell with a heart of gold.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


My brother in law who is 37 married a woman who is 13 his senior and they have a lovely family and they are still I loved after 10 years of marriage. And she looks stunning ( it's not a joke) and he is very proud whenever they go out..

My point is that age it's just a number when you click with somebody, because no matter if she would have been younger or older then you, it's still her with whom you'd click :grin2:

In some couples the age difference is greater then in others but then again who cares? If you are happy, she's happy then that's all that matters:grin2:


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

lifeistooshort said:


> Right? Pretty high opinion of himself.


Word. No shortage of that around here.

Either way, I get the feeling that his "uppance shall come".

Giggity.


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## Dread Pirate Roberts (May 22, 2012)

coffee4me said:


> I hear about this all the time from my group of friends; we are all around 50. My friends are on various OLD sites. Their typical messages are from men in the 60-65 age range. They read many profiles where men in their 50's are looking for a woman 35-45. Many of them feel that men their age only want women 5-10+ years younger. They feel the flip side of the 60-65 year old men that they are too old and prefer men 50-58 yr old. . It's frustrating for them and seems to be typical of OLD.
> 
> I see it here on TAM as well when a guy gets screwed over the advice is he should get a YOUNGER, hotter woman.


There were some threads on the POF forum about men 40 and up having problems because all the women around their age were going for younger men, they were too old for the younger women, and they didn't want women much older than them.

Who knows how true it is. I think a lot of people doing OLD are simply trying to outkick their coverage, and failing.

DPR


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## Faithful Wife (Oct 31, 2012)

Dread Pirate Roberts said:


> There were some threads on the POF forum about *men 40 and up having problems because all the women around their age were going for younger men, they were too old for the younger women, and they didn't want women much older than them*.
> 
> *Who knows how true it is*. I think a lot of people doing OLD are simply trying to outkick their coverage, and failing.
> 
> DPR


It is totally true.


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