# Separated after 5 years



## E8H3 (May 7, 2012)

I've come over from the coping with infidelity forum. The basic rundown of my story is that I caught my husband in an EA, which I attempted to reconcile with him, and he ended up leaving me for her about 2 months after. She is married too.

He was also a person with an explosive, abusive temper, and called me names I wouldn't utter to my biggest enemy. I have come to realize how lucky I am that he left - all in the 5-6 days I've been on my own thus far. 

The reason I am here is to keep myself motivated, because I know this is the right thing, and to, hopefully, get some support from others that may be in a similar situation.

I've been the only one with a job for over a year, and that has worked to my advantage, because I don't have to change my living arrangements. What I've been doing is moving things around to different rooms, etc. and it's been making me feel like it's a new start, like my home. 

I haven't cried since the day he left. I sort of lost the ability to cry within the last year, because the emotional abuse was killing me. I used to cry every day. It's hard to explain, but I basically started believing the things he said were true - like I was a piece of trash and I was fat and lazy, and I was lucky to have him. Then, he would go into charming mode and tell me he's sooo sooo sorry and he loves me sooo sooo much and he will change. Then before you know it, he's doing it again. This went on for the 5 years we've been together. I'm humiliated that I put up with it and let someone treat me like that. I'm ashamed I believed it.

Other than rearranging my house, I've been working a lot, I bought a car (as I was driving his car and making the payments), in cash, joined meet up.com as I don't have any friends that are close by, and that's basically it. The first night I was terrified of being alone in this house - but after that I felt okay. I'm not really sure what to do from here. I guess I need to file the divorce papers. I'm disgusted that I still have his name.

Thanks for listening!


----------



## ku1980rose (Sep 7, 2010)

You sound like you are doing some great things for yourself!!!! Keep strong! You deserve better than putting up with his crap!!!!


----------



## MOMMY2ONE (Mar 6, 2012)

Good luck to you ... Keep strong and always remember to keep your head up high , you're doing a great job keeping yourself busy enjoy every bit of your new life with out him...
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------

