# How far should a conversation go with your child's mother who is your ex?



## Cologrl81 (Feb 5, 2013)

This is my only problem with this. I don't think that my husband needs to be having anyother type of conversation with his ex unless it involves their child. But he seems to find it ok to conversate with her about her relationship with her husband whom she is always having problems with. I have extended my hand out to her and let her know that she can talk to me if she needed to. I told her that we didn't need to be best friends but she knows what happens when she calls my husband and tells him all her business. It may not be any of my business in the matter but when she calls and it causes conflict because she has no one else that is when it becomes my business. Is that wrong of me to say or to think that way?


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## *LittleDeer* (Apr 19, 2012)

No you are right, it's not appropriate for your husband to be his exes emotional support system, they divorced for a reason, he now should be your emotional support system.

judging by your other thread though, he often behaves in an untrustworthy manner and causes conflict with inappropriate relationships with the opposite sex.

He needs to prioritise your marriage and your feelings above other peoples, if he can't do that he shouldn't be married.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

This is not ok. IT would not really be ok for you to be her sounding board either. 

LittleDeer is right. Your husband does not seem to understand boundaries with women while married. 

Whey did he get a divorce from her? What happened in their marriage?

.


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## Holland (Aug 20, 2012)

Well from the other side, ex and I are friends and we talk about lots of things besides the kids. He is building something for me ATM and we help each other out where possible.

We are both in new, serious, relationships and never flirt or talk about anything inappropriate. We don't talk about our relationships as such but we do talk about issues around our children and our new relationships.

TBH I would be a bit annoyed if his new partner took it upon herself to suggest I talk to her instead of him. He and I have know each other for 20 or so years now, if i choose to talk to him or he to me, that is up to us.

My partner has no problem with me having a coffee with my ex or the fact that we discuss things other than our kids.


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## KeepLoveGrowing (Feb 1, 2013)

It's a fine line. On one side, your husband should be able to talk to his ex and be friendly with her as long as he keeps it appropriate. Having a good relationship with your child's other-parent will make life easier all around for years to come. On the other side, if he is proving himself untrustworthy in any areas, is being inappropriate, or is making an effort to exclude you or keep you "out of the loop" with her, then I'd have a problem with it.


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## curlysue321 (Jul 30, 2012)

I don't think women should be discussing their relationship problems with another woman's husband. That is very dangerous. It is a total betrayal of who she is with. They should be communicating about the child and that is it.


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