# I want out but am scared



## abroad (May 2, 2009)

I live abroad with my husband in his home country. He has never had a steady job here and has gone for long stretches without any income. He always has a small business plan but the plans do not happen. I began working here (10 years ago--and have been steady) and have slowly risen among the ranks and have a good job with great benefits for my 3 kids. It is in a school that has a great environment and great education free for them. I am a school leader and work VERY hard but am seeing financial rewards.

My husband's latest plan like all of them requires an investment. The only money we have, I make. I need other things and life is not easy in this country (or anywhere) for a family of 5.

Bottomline: I am being badgered into supporting this business plan: the big one that is going to make him happy and successful. It involves land in the country-side and I hate the hot and sticky country-side and see no place for myself in his plan. However, I am badgered into it and to split my earnings with him. 

I do not love him, trust him, respect him or believe in him. I want out. I am far from my family, am unclear of the laws and feel that my husband will not leave easily.

I want my kids to be happy and they love their dad, however, I am fed up.

Also, if it gets messy: I am the leadership in a small community school that my 5,9 and 19 year olds attend. I could ruin my career if my husband blows up and act badly.

Many might ask why I have been doing this for so long...all I can say is I wanted to believe in this man's potential and hate the idea of divorce.

Any feedback? Please reply!


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## abroad (May 2, 2009)

Please reply!


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

You are not really asking a clear question. What do you want to achieve?


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## Sensitive (Mar 29, 2009)

There are always a lot of risks when we seriously consider divorce. I often think I can't possibly change my life so drastically, I will have to give up my neighborhood, my parent's approval, my status, and whole lot of emotional attachments. If I were you, I would also feel very uncomfortable investing money I earned to support a venture that I disagree with. I had a big request from my husband to financially support his daughter's college education, and it has surprisingly been the biggest problem in our marriage lately. It sounds like you have more than money problems. I encourage you to plan carefully, but be careful. Sometimes your heart and head will disagree. Good luck.


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