# She can't keep her hands off other men



## Orangerose (Aug 27, 2008)

I'm very fragile after my husband's emotional affair. My child is on a school sports team. There is one mom who can't keep her hands off dad's on the team, she is worse when she is drinking. She is married. Her husband is around part of the time. She always seems to touch my husband every time we are around her. I have observed her, and she stays away from the men who aren't as friendly. Should I say something to her. I have noticed most of the women stay away from her. I have told my husband he could make himself more unapproachable. What do you think?


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## justean (May 28, 2008)

i'd simply have to say, you and your H need to distance yourself from her presence.
like you said make yourself unapproachable if you feel uncomfortable by her presence.
i dont think its a matter of "could" though, but "should" be unapproachable.
sounds like the problem with her is with her own devalued morels, the more she allowed to do it, the more she wil continue to get on your nerves, which causes arguments etc etc.
even if you were to say something, it wouldnt stop her.
so take yourselves out of her picture. when she approaches you, simply walk away.


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## Orangerose (Aug 27, 2008)

I do think you are right. I have asked my husband to stay away from her for my sake. The last game we were at, we were sitting on bleachers by each other. She came right up to him and rubbed both his legs above his knees, right in front of me while she was talking to him. He did nothing to get her to come to him like that. What should he have done. I don't think he knew what to do. I do want to watch my child play in his sport.


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## justean (May 28, 2008)

the thing is and i found this out. ok i admit i am a touchy /feely person, but i know my boundaries.
what you find is ppl who dont have those boundaries have little value for themselves.
example - the woman who slept with my H, i spoke to a mate and asked what should i do, "i said , should i give her a slap".
my mate in turn told me ppl like her just have no morals about their actions n e way and it wouldnt get me n e where.
in fact my mate was right.
the girl is a promiscous girl who wouldnt think twice about breaking up a marriage.
unfortunately ppl like her and your little sports friend , really dont think twice, because they simply dont care.


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## GPR (Jan 3, 2009)

I agree, if you say something, you are increasing her ego because that is what she is going for.

IF ANYTHING IS SAID, it needs to be the husband. Nothing mean or confrontational at first. Just next time she does it, he needs to politely (but firmly) say "Please stop touching me." If she asks why or anything, he just needs to say "I don't like it" and that's it. Nothing else.

If she fits the stereotype, she might get pissed off or something because a guy is rejecting her flirting or whatever. If she is just a naturally touchy-feely kind of person, she probably get the hint and apologize and not do it again.


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## justean (May 28, 2008)

GPR said:


> If she is just a naturally touchy-feely kind of person, she probably get the hint and apologize and not do it again.


:iagree:


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## wonder (Jun 30, 2008)

i don't know any touchy feely people who touch other people's upper legs. everyone is right, you can't say anything yet coz it'll only fuel her ego. your hubby needs to do something. he needs to tell her to stop touching him and walk away. if she tries again he needs to somehow find a way, not violently, to push her away. maybe he needs to start kissing you, not make out kiss coz there are children around, in front of her. hopefully she'll get the messege he's off limits. if not, then i don't know what to tell you. all i could say is what i would do- beat the p!ss out of her. yes i know it's wrong and violence is never the answer, but i know my temper and after giving someone tons of hints and then directly saying stop, and they continue, then all bets are off.


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## GPR (Jan 3, 2009)

I agree that the way you are describing what she is doing doesn't seem like a naturally touchy-feely person, but not all people like this are trying to bed the men. They aren't necessarily *****s... just attention-*****s. 

But yeah, anyway I think the first step is for your husband to make himself as unavailable as possible to this woman... but as we all know, that's not 100% effective. So if it happens again, he needs to just politely say something to her. Very politely, and very nicely (the first time). And if it comes up, he shouldn't say it has ANYTHING to do with you. It should be because HE doesn't like it, not because you don't like it.

If that doesn't take care of it.... then more drastic measures should be taken.


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

I would just go up to her and tell her to stop touching my husband.

I had guys super flirt with my wife, it does not bother me, but as soon as I introduce myself and comment aboutt heir behavior to my wife 9 out of 10 times they just stop, becuase they noticed, that I noticed and think I will do something.

I would just calmy go up to the woman introduce yourself to her and say that you are Mrs. X and say, 'wow honey you sure like to touch my hubby, can I do that to your hubby when he is here?" Chances are that she will stop.

I know other people will disagree with this, but it sends a clear picture to this lady.


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## GPR (Jan 3, 2009)

GAsoccerman said:


> I would just go up to her and tell her to stop touching my husband.
> 
> I had guys super flirt with my wife, it does not bother me, but as soon as I introduce myself and comment aboutt heir behavior to my wife 9 out of 10 times they just stop, becuase they noticed, that I noticed and think I will do something.
> 
> ...


The reason I say that the husband should probably do it is because as other people said, depending on the type of person she is, she probably gets a rise out of pissing off other wives, and it might not make it stop. It will only stop when the wife is close by, and she will be WORSE if she doesn't happen to be around.


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## GAsoccerman (Mar 24, 2008)

well I am sure the hubby said something to the woman, I have a woman here at work that wants me, she often tell me how she would love to give me a BJ. She knows I am not interested, but she keeps trying, doesn't worry me, becuase even though she is very good looking, I am just not interested.

I am sure this is how Elliemays hubby feels, like , "oh here we go again" and maybe even gets a chuckle out of it, especially with the other "guys" Saying yep, there she goes again.

If I were Elliemay I would say something, nothing nasty, but let it be known. That is all, be very polite about it.

I've seen this type and Elliemay if your hubby is happily married to you, you two should just laugh at how pathetic this woman is.

flirting is one thing, tossing yourself at someone else is completely different.


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## MsLady (Dec 1, 2008)

What do we teach our kids about inappropriate touching? We let them know that it is their right to speak up and say no and walk away from someone who is making them uncomfortable. No different for an adult.

While it would be an awkward moment, the next time she puts her hands on your husband's thighs, he needs to stare directly at her hands and say "I'm not comfortable with your hands on my thighs". THAT simply and clearly. Yes, she'll get all weird and awkward, but too bad, learn some boundaries lady and stop acting ****ty with the hubbies. She probably gets such a rush/ power-trip at touching men inappropriately while the wife watches and silently seeths.

I agree with others, though, that your husband has to do the dirty work. If you confront her, it will only boost her ego and up the challenge to pursue him more.


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## Orangerose (Aug 27, 2008)

The one thing that really bothers me about this woman is she is a middle school teacher.


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## vasilies (Apr 22, 2016)

My wife is also very touchy when she is talking to men and I confronted on this issue but first she denied it but when i pointed out to her when she did it she started to arguee on another issue that we where talking about and never mentioned the touching part it has left me very confused why she needs to touch men as she does not do that with women as you said that you are a touch person yourself maybe you could help why she does that


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

Orangerose said:


> *I'm very fragile after my husband's emotional affair.* My child is on a school sports team. There is one mom who can't keep her hands off dad's on the team, *she is worse when she is drinking.* She is married. Her husband is around part of the time. She always seems to touch my husband every time we are around her. I have observed her, and she stays away from the men who aren't as friendly. Should I say something to her. I have noticed most of the women stay away from her*. I have told my husband he could make himself more unapproachable.* What do you think?


Honestly I think your husband should be doing more to get away from this woman...purposely sitting far away from where she is..at the very least...especially after HIS crossing his own boundaries with another woman!!...

You are trying to rebuilt TRUST with him... if he's blowing this off...he's going about it all the wrong way.. Of course you will be more sensitive here -given what has happened. Much more [email protected]#

Speaking as a touchy feely type.. and not sure I am just weird or what.. but I am not comfortable or would ever want to touch someone else.. I don't even feel comfortable getting a massage from a stranger.. I don't reach out & hug people readily either.. My husband is also a touchy feely type ... but all that energy goes to each other.. as it should be.. 

And why is this middle school teacher -even a little drunk, at sporting events.. what is the world coming to!


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## Herschel (Mar 27, 2016)

This inst about this woman at all, it's about your husband. Just cause you can see this specific person means nothing. He is out if your site a lot, I am sure, and has to know what is and isn't acceptable. If he is allowing this woman to flirt with him right in front of you and you have to tell him to back away, I can't imagine what he allows when you aren't there. Clearly whatever happened in his EA hasn't really registered with him. He should know, everything with every other woman is all business. This is on him and it's sad he hasn't done it himself.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Nucking Futs (Apr 8, 2013)

vasilies said:


> My wife is also very touchy when she is talking to men and I confronted on this issue but first she denied it but when i pointed out to her when she did it she started to arguee on another issue that we where talking about and never mentioned the touching part it has left me very confused why she needs to touch men as she does not do that with women as you said that you are a touch person yourself maybe you could help why she does that


You need to start your own thread. This thread has been dead for 7 years but everyone who reads it without noticing the date is going to respond to the original post rather than yours.


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