# i am broken and i regret !! he will divorce me



## jennifer22009 (Sep 19, 2009)

i am a muslim arabic girl 25 years old and good looking that is also what my husbund use to tell me all the time but unfortunatly my behaviour drive me to loose him forever ; after meeting my husband in another country (wich is not his country neither)where i worked we decided to go back home to our country to get marry , and i didnt know him much it was only one month after we got married but he stayed with me just another month then he travelled in order to make my visa ready , i was fine but day after day because of he wanting me to be online with him everyday , he asked me to dont work and just wait my visa procedures wich took a long time ; so i stayed 11 month in that case , just routine and feeling bore wich pushed me to fight with him everyday , because of no reason ; i am just feeling doubt without any prouf and the problem is i really know that he is a nice person and he never cheated on me ; even his mother tell me that , wich i started to doubt that maybye i have some obsessive-compulsive disorder i am not sure but it seems like that , because ideas come throw my mind without being stop and i fight with him everyday online , and he use to call me on the back when i go offline trying to make back to him and sometimes he cry a lot and asking me to dont leave him , untill i started to tell him that i want to divorce him , but in fact i never means it , i mean it was just a say but i never was planning to do it , anyway ,finally , my husband couldnt keep patient ; he use to cry and let me come back to him online but lately , he started to change he just told me that he is tired of my behaviour and he asked me to appolizige to him and dont do it again , and i did appolizige but i start to do it again , untill it gets worse and i repeated again to divorce me and he said i will ; wich in the begining i thought that he just said but i am shocked because he really stopped contacting me and i called him on the phone and i did appolizige and he said to me that he decided and took desicon after a long thought , and he will divorce me , and he told me that he sent a message to the emabssy in order to cancell my visa to dont come to him , and that is now 2 weeks that we stopped having a contact ,and i feel very regret and very sad because , with my behaviour i have pushed him away from me ; wich i know well that he loved me but i dont think now because before he use to cry to be countinued with me even all the things i have done to him , but now he is totally different and he dosnt care about me and he told me that he is going to send me the paper of divorce i still love him i told him that he answered me by saying that if i loved him i wouldnt behave with him in such a way 

i am really very dispointed , it is only because i am so sick inside i am tried and i couldnt stand him being far from me all that time it is nearlly one year that we are far from each other , and being online everyday from the time he come from work untill he go to work made me depressed and stressed specially when i knew that the papers of my visa application will take another few month and it might be succed it might not 

i do declare that i use to insult him and behave bad with him but i swear i loved him and i still do but it is only something inside me like make really feel like a crab !!!


i know it is late !! but dont you think guys , if he really love me , shouldnt he foregive me 
and not do that step of divorce 
wich normally he did forgive a lot but i re do the same things again , 
by the way he was before married and divorced and had two kids 


i really feel like i am lost and i dont think that i will forget that easilly ; my whole familly knew that i am waiting for my visa procedures to join my husband and now how should face them telling them that it was my fault to push him away from me , and asked me for a divorce 

i am just thinking to dont sign the paper of divorce if he send it to me !! so that he wont divorce me any more 

my plan is to go back to another country to work and i am not planning to sign the divorce paper 


because i still love him i am broken heart , it is very difficult to do the divrce in this ramadan month it is a very religious month and very respected , because heis a froegin he dosnt undertand these things even he become muslim for me he still cant undertand these things ....

please help , is there any chance to let him back dont tell me talk to him , he wont know anything about me 

but the most things hurt me is that yes i declare that i was rude to him when he left me because he had to go back to his own country because of teh credit he had 
i did sacrifice by staying in my home country without a job because i am not used to work in my country and also he never sent me any money i just took money from mom and i dont ask him as soon as he told me i have credit i didnt care about that and he were planing to live with his parents where he is actually
but all that at once he will forget me ! i cant imagine my life without him 
yes i use to say it before but it wasnt serious and alsohe knew that even if i want it for exemple i can not do it because he only have the right to divorce , for me to do it from here in my country will be very diffivult and of course i will never do it , it was just a say cause i of me being angry 

what do u think about that !


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## dobo (Jun 30, 2009)

I think you should accept that it is over. He's seen that you are very immature and he probably realized that he doesn't know you that well, in the first place. 

I don't know where he is from but if he is a US citizen, in order to bring you here he'd have to agree to take care of you for 10 years whether or not you end up divorcing (there are some add'l issues, but I'll just simplify it by sticking with the 10 year support agreement). Right now he can't see himself living with a woman who is so immature or combative or who will throw around the word "divorce" in order to get her own way. There are plenty of women who wouldn't have done this and he's not about to go through all of the hassle jsut to end up divorced but still having to take care of you.

I don't think you really love him or know him anyway. And I don't think you know what love is because your behavior only shows that you know when you've lost something and that's where all your emotion is coming from. If he were to "forgive" you, you'd be back to your old behavior again and he knows it.

Lick your wounds and wait for your divorce. And grow up.


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## jennifer22009 (Sep 19, 2009)

i want to tell u something bobo , 

he use to cry and ask me to never leave him 
i dont want to say what also i did sacrifise for , i left my job in another country where i first met him ,and i did refuse another job apportunity , in orther to get the visa procedures and join him plus he stopped me from work aotherise outside the country or in my country and i just kept quiet and i kept patient , i take all the money from mom cause he dosnt want me to work , he never sent me any cent frm the time he went back to his own country , causehe have some long credit bills wich he is paying now !!!
i am not a bad girl otherwise he wont marry me from the first time he met me wich was only one month , and he beleieved that i was so wrong , well why do u think around all this 10 month is was me who use to tell him to divorce me and he said no this will never happen!!
he just said finally because he thought that is what i really want 
that is why i wrote in this site this story , that i regret that he will think that i dont want him 

well iam sure he loves me because before i read ur answer , he aleardy called me and we are fine now and thingscame back like it was 
so dont jump an say whatever u should ask and then i will answer u 
he told me hiself many many times when i use to ask him , why udont want to divorce me he said , because still there are good things on u 
so dont say that i am immature , because u dont know me as a person 
by the way my life was a better way when i was single 
and i do look nice i havea better opportunity to be with a best one 
it is only because i eally loved him
because if i was hypocrtite i wont arrive to that level !!
and i will not be in that site 
if you are complicated from muslim well dont answer my post 
us a citizen go to ur nationality s person problem 
cause i think y are rasist !
i see people when they wanna answr a forum they at last ask 
why u do that or anything 
and u just jumped saying to me that i wait for a divorc cause i am a immature one !! do u know me in person to say that 
he just said it cause i also use to said it to him a lot so he just done exctely the things i have done to him 
in the end he came to me and he is going to travell for me next month to come to see me


in the end i am better than him and i can have a better one than him i am younger and more educated than him , there were a better one who wanted me before but i refused them because i loved him 
it i only because i love him nothing more so dont jump and say that i dont love him u dont own my heart


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## dobo (Jun 30, 2009)

I am far from a racist. And you are immature. It is nice that you think that you are better than him. Is that love? I think not. Do you tell him the things you've said here about how much you've given up for him and how you could do better than him and how you are better than him? I suspect your bratty face is the one that he's going to learn is your true face. 

So call me a racist if you prefer. But there are good traits to bring into marriage and there are bad traits, and marriages that occur after only a month and are full of bad traits are not marriages that I would expect to last. It doesn't matter what your background is.


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## swedish (Mar 6, 2008)

jennifer22009 said:


> well iam sure he loves me because before i read ur answer , he aleardy called me and we are fine now and thingscame back like it was


Glad to hear. I do hope you realize what this means...either love the man or let him go...I hope he will not put up with anymore yelling and divorce talk from you, and really hope he will not have to.


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## feylovelyheart (Jun 13, 2009)

Jennifer...

I think you took dobo's word in wrong way. He said things about you based on what we read on your post. I don't understand why did you jump into conclussion that dobo is a rasict. I don't see any evident from what he wrote which showed him as a racist.. Indeed, he doesn't know you in person...neither other people in this site but based on what you wrote, we have an idea about who you are based on what you wrote about your self. 

I am sorry to say this...but I think you are a lil bit immature and so emotional. I understand what you had been through but as you admitted that this thing happen because you did this to your self. 
You were acting so immature by threathening your husband about getting divorce everytime you have a problem with him. even though you didn't mean it, don't you think it hurt him inside?

As a muslim....you know that if you are a husband and you said about want to divorce your wife and the divorce is count. You should realize that you can't play around with divorce. 

I am sure you are a good and beautiful woman. I have no doubt about it. but...

I don't think it's a nice thing to say that you are better than other people since people have their own quality that other people don't have it. 

Bottom line is...

You need to change your attitude. I am sure your husband has limit in his patient. If you go back from who you were, this thing will happen again since it's not easy to change who you are. But I hope things are going to be better for you and your husband.

I don't mean to be rude and I am sorry if I misjudge you too but I wrote what I know based on what I read. This is just my opinion. you can leave it if you don't like it.


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## 5themperor (May 28, 2012)

Use reverse Psychology Jennifer - agree and go along with everything you hate about the whole thing. 80% cases used this technique report relationships are salvaged. So anger replace with smiles. Shouting replace with understanding. Blame replace with you accepting your to blame. Negative feeds off negative. Negative can not feed of positive . It works. Check out Holmer - "How to stop your divorce"


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## pidge70 (Jan 17, 2011)

This thread is almost 3yrs old.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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