# I feel like I’m dying inside. My marriage is a nightmare.



## AnonymousGal# (Dec 23, 2020)

it’s Been three years, three long years of hate, fights to the point of no return and damaged emotions. A 3 year old and one on the way, I know what your thinking what would make me stay? Honestly, praying and hoping for the best I guess. My husband is the meanest, most hateful man I’ve never met in my life. I’m currently 22 weeks pregnant and I know deep down inside he could bring danger to my unborn child and my self. If it’s not verbally, mentally and I hate to even admit physically. He sits up and pick at me by starting petty arguments then gaslighting me. Everything is my fought and I can’t do nothing rite. Like I mentioned I’m pregnant and have been really emotional. There have been times that I have cried and he will shame me for doing so. I’m at a point of no return. I feel if I don’t leave I will regret it. A few days ago we had a really bad fight and the next day I experienced lite bleeding. The time is now to exit.


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## AmbitiousOvercomer (Jul 4, 2019)

You already have the answer. Get you and your child out NOW. You have no time to waste here. Do not allow your child to be exposed to this any situation any longer.

Be safe!


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## AnonymousGal# (Dec 23, 2020)

AmbitiousOvercomer said:


> You already have the answer. Get you and your child out NOW. You have no time to waste here. Do not allow your child to be exposed to this any situation any longer.
> 
> Be safe!


I really appreciate your words. My grandmother always told me if I'm going to do something to just do it. I'm going to be all about this. Thanks for responding.


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## Gabriel (May 10, 2011)

Good luck. I hope you get the courage to do what you feel you need to do.


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## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

Is there a woman’s support group near you. Look for it and get the help you need to leave. Tell your family and friends also.


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## DallasCowboyFan (Nov 20, 2012)

If you have family that you can get to, you need to leave and move in with them. Or, call the police and ask about a women and children's shelter. Don't wait. Don't put your kids through this. There is a bright future but you have to end the nightmare. Tell your friends, tell your family what is going on. You need their support and nudging to get out and get through this


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## GC1234 (Apr 15, 2020)

AnonymousGal# said:


> it’s Been three years, three long years of hate, fights to the point of no return and damaged emotions. A 3 year old and one on the way, I know what your thinking what would make me stay? Honestly, praying and hoping for the best I guess. My husband is the meanest, most hateful man I’ve never met in my life. I’m currently 22 weeks pregnant and I know deep down inside he could bring danger to my unborn child and my self. If it’s not verbally, mentally and I hate to even admit physically. He sits up and pick at me by starting petty arguments then gaslighting me. Everything is my fought and I can’t do nothing rite. Like I mentioned I’m pregnant and have been really emotional. There have been times that I have cried and he will shame me for doing so. I’m at a point of no return. I feel if I don’t leave I will regret it. A few days ago we had a really bad fight and the next day I experienced lite bleeding. The time is now to exit.


I would go to the police station and let them help you get to a shelter for battered women, agree with poster above. Do not go home at all. Please stay safe.


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## JustTheWife (Nov 1, 2017)

Praying for you. Your grandmother is right ...you need to act but be careful and think your moves through. Look out for your urgent immediate safety needs but also think ahead. You'll soon have two kids and the reality is that resolving this situation is a long game. Like chess you need to think about your opening, middlegame, and endgame...and your opening is best executed with an understanding of your middle and endgames. Good luck to you. KNOW you can do this.


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## Totally T (Dec 20, 2020)

I'm a white man and from my perspective, yeah, divorce. You're young enough to yet put together a good family and you're blessed with children, and may have more, which add so much to one's life.


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

Please just go, if not for your sake for the children. Your 3 year old will have already seen and heard far too much and those early years are so important. Make a new life for yourself and the children, and dont tell him where you are going. None of you are safe.


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## jlg07 (Feb 24, 2017)

While you are trying to decide, PLEASE -- if he does get physical with you CALL THE POLICE. You need to get these attacks on record. You may want to consider recording his abuse on your phone, again just for proof.
I am so sorry you are going through this -- do what is best for YOU and your children -- don't worry about what he wants or needs. Protect YOU.


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## Mr.Married (Feb 21, 2018)

One of the best things that you can do is to get information. If you know the facts then you know your options. Knowledge is power. It is a simple first step to call the police station and find out what resources are available. With that knowledge you can then start your plan.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

@AnonymousGal# I hope these resources might be of some use to you:-





Resources by state on violence against women | Office on Women's Health







www.womenshealth.gov












Search Our Resources







www.thehotline.org









» National Domestic Violence Organizations







www.nationalcenterdvtraumamh.org












22 Groups Fighting Domestic Violence


There’s help available for you 24/7/365.




greatist.com


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## Trident (May 23, 2018)

Not understanding why, after 3 years of absolute HELL you'd bring another child into this.


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## Totally T (Dec 20, 2020)

****, OP!

Divorce. I'm Catholic and I say this. Growing up my family was a Cold War, I was abused physically and emotionally by my father and never had a father I could respect and trust. Fathers are important to boys and to girls. Let the B.S. end.

fwiw, after about 15 years of marriage, my mother just kind of emotionally disconnected from my brother and me; as teens we had to find our own way.

More than this, I saw negative examples of marriage; my parents and their parents both had ****y marriages. When I was 19 I firmly believed I would never be married, and so I never dated with marriage in mind, just sex. Not a good way to go for many reasons there! When I was about 28 I ran into my wife, and it took 7 years of dating to have confidence in getting married. . . and the damn fall-out was that we could just have 1 kid by then (I think 4 makes a good number, but that's another discussion).


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## bobert (Nov 22, 2018)

Trident said:


> Not understanding why, after 3 years of absolute HELL you'd bring another child into this.


You have no clue what her situation is. Best not to judge without knowing the facts. For all we know his physical abuse includes sexual abuse and control. Some abusive men will get their wives pregnant to make them stay.

And if that's not the case, well, people make poor decisions sometimes. We're human, it happens. Do you really think the OP needs that kind of criticism right now? She probably feels bad enough. Not every thought needs to be shared.


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