# Living in silent unhappiness



## LiaR (Jun 19, 2016)

Hi,
I have been married for 24 years and over the past 5 years I feel like I am living in silent misery. My husband is not one to express feelings nor is he one to understand or listen to my feelings. My husband has the type of personality that he is right, his views are correct and his opinions are not negotiable. He yelled at my daughter for burping after dinner one night 1 year ago when he constantly burps and he caused such a rif in their relationship that they have not spoken in 9 months now. I found a football and brought it home, my puppy chewed it up and my husband was so angry that he didn't speak to me all day. 
Then when he is over being angry, he is nice as can be. I feel like I walk on eggshells all the time and when he comes home from work in a bad mood I have to be super over...friendly to snap him out of it. 

I find myself wishing so badly that I had married a nice, happy, life loving person. Not someone who has a constantly negative outlook on everything. He is the definition of the glass is half empty person.

I feel like I am a constant actress, acting happy, acting like a loving caring wife and secretly wishing for days when he is gone...gone out with friends, gone fishing for the day, gone out to the river with his brother. I am so happy and at peace when he is gone. I love life, come and go as I please, spend fun time with my kids, can mess up the house and leave it a mess! 

What is holding me back is how do I tell him, how do I leave, what do I do? Can I make it financially? He has threatened if I ever leave, he will burn down the house so I don't have a penny.

I have started exercising a lot and have gotten in shape, I have recently applied to go back to college and finish my degree. I am trying to prepare my life for eventual separation but I am scared and I don't know if I can do it on my own. Honestly, if I had financial means, I would have been gone a while ago. I have a good job and make a fair income but I would be strapped on my own and have to live in poverty. Now I am comfortable.

What should I do? If I try to talk to him, he will tell me: You don't like it, there's the door!


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