# Yell at kids n i feel like crap now



## tripad (Apr 18, 2014)

The usual rush for school , work , meals n with some trouble at work and i am single mum with no support so i am highly strung . Throw in a non stop whinning 8 yr old and a 10 yr old who tried to be a clown tonight . I yelled at the kids . Now i feel like crap .


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## SecondTime'Round (Jan 15, 2015)

Awww, give them hugs and apologize to them. The give yourself some hugs and forgive yourself.

We've all been there! (Well, moms anyway!)


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## tripad (Apr 18, 2014)

Hate it when i yelled at the big guy who just picked up clowning around . The teacher called up and asked too is he under stress or something . He clowns in class and disrupts the class and thinks it's funny . Nit sure if it's a result of the divorce . He has been holding up well so far . With me i noriced the same at home . But he's a real sweet boy who will be upset if i m upset and will changed instantly . 

Just dont know what caused it .


Wondered if the as8 dad did ?


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## NobodySpecial (Nov 22, 2013)

tripad said:


> The usual rush for school , work , meals n with some trouble at work and i am single mum with no support so i am highly strung . Throw in a non stop whinning 8 yr old and a 10 yr old who tried to be a clown tonight . I yelled at the kids . Now i feel like crap .


Meh. Cut yourself some slack. And at the same time, make things EASIER for yourself through effective positive discipline. 8 and 10 is getting a late start, but imagine if your kids were assets at getting things done rather than a pain.

*****ing triumvirate of resources

http://www.amazon.com/Discipline-Life-Getting-Right-Children/dp/1887069062


http://www.amazon.com/Setting-Limit...qid=1440780384&sr=1-2&keywords=setting+limits

How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk: Adele Faber, Elaine Mazlish: 9781451663884: Amazon.com: Books


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## Pluto2 (Aug 17, 2011)

It would probably be a good idea to talk with the school counselor. They deal with the fall out of divorce all the time (sadly). Its always a good idea to let the teacher's know when something like this is going on at home because of course it will have an effect on them, how could it not? They spend so many hours of the day at school. 

When my ex left my youngest was in the fourth grade and was having a hard time coming to terms with events that had happened, and things she had heard. Her reaction to our divorce was to shut down, your's is to clown in class. My DD hated going to the counselor, and was mad at me for a bit for making her go. But it helped. She was able to verbalize more and could set appropriate boundaries with some classmates who tried to ridicule her. Kids can be mean until they develop empathy. I can report now she is a fabulous young woman and some of those mean kids have become real friends once they understood what my daughter was going through.

So talk to them. Tell them you are trying to cope and you will make mistakes. Acknowledge it happened and strive to do better.


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

We've all lost it with our kids. The great thing about having kids is that they let us apologize and try to do better.

"Hey guys, I'm sorry I lost this morning. I really feel a lot of stress in the morning and I really need your help and cooperation so we can get out the door on time. We need to do better, all of us."

And then you can let it sit and see if morning cooperation improves. You can problem solve with each kid to find ways everyone can tweak the process. Or you can leave it to your kids to problem solve and tell you what they think will reduce the morning stress.

A series of stressful mornings indicates you are not as prepared as you should be. Meaning changing the night time routine so morning run smoother, getting them up earlier, or finding things you can cut back on.


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## tripad (Apr 18, 2014)

My work has tripled since my ex ripped my savings zero n not sending that miserable support money till i send legal letters . Even then it's usually short . Good thing is income is now 4 times more . Building my nest .

The kids have gotten over their worse . They didnt want to speak to counsellor , i asked them . They said nothing to talk about . 

It's just the stress of rushing about everywhere , classes n they had to tag along to my work place regularly . No family support . So it's tiring yet i have to soldier them on as i have to keep time .

Poor kids .

But they are doing great in school . Younger boy 90 and above . Big guy 70-80. 

Some days i just lose it :'(


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## Orange_Pekoe (Jan 5, 2015)

Please show me a mother who has not yelled at her kid(s) at some point or another when she was stressed. I'd like to know what magic potion she's drinking. 

You can't be super-mom. Slow down. Take it one step at a time. You are very overwhelmed with a divorce and raising the children on your own. Know that everything DOESN'T have to be perfect, it's OK to get mad sometimes, but don't make it a habit. As another posted said: if you are stressed out every morning, it means you're not giving yourself enough time. Sleep earlier the night before and wake earlier in the morning. Give yourself time. Everything will be OK.


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## tripad (Apr 18, 2014)

Thanks 

I feel better 

My kids were sweet . I apologised and explained the stress and the need to hsve cooperation and keep time for my job. They understood and thanked me for being here for them . 

The mornings are fine .

The afternoons are a rush toggling work and kids . 

The nights are tiring after a long day and they are simply being kids playing fool but mum is tired .


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