# Ok men what’s the reason



## Sue4473 (May 29, 2018)

Ok so I’m still looking for another job, and busting my tush to make no mistakes at my current one. No doubt that’s it been rough lately. 
I wanted to start a thread on a lighter note! 
I have a few single guy friends and occasionally it we talk text about what’s going on etc.
I’ve noticed that some ignore when I ask them- how’s the love life? Or Did you get a girlfriend? I asked one that cause he used to call every night then it just stopped. So I asked and he totally ignored it!

Do you men feel it’s none of your business or is it a macho thing? What’s the big deal just say yes or no. I’m just making convo. Talking about the weather gets old lol


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## Andy1001 (Jun 29, 2016)

Sue4473 said:


> Ok so I’m still looking for another job, and busting my tush to make no mistakes at my current one. No doubt that’s it been rough lately.
> I wanted to start a thread on a lighter note!
> I have a few single guy friends and occasionally it we talk text about what’s going on etc.
> I’ve noticed that some ignore when I ask them- how’s the love life? Or Did you get a girlfriend? I asked one that cause he used to call every night then it just stopped. So I asked and he totally ignored it!
> ...


I’ll be brutally honest.Unless these are close friends then it’s none of your business whether they have a girlfriend or how their sex life is.
Save that talk for your girlfriends or male relatives.
Also,they may feel you’re hitting on them.


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## Maxwedge 413 (Apr 16, 2014)

Do they feel you're texting them for a booty-call, and they're not interested in you like that?


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## Sue4473 (May 29, 2018)

One is like a brother and we’ve talked about our dating lives etc. 
so not sure why ignore. One yes we were a couple and talk. And in one of those talks we’ve said dating sucks or yea I went out yada yada.... either way, saying you have a girlfriend isn’t that personal. Im not asking if your having sex geez lol


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## uhtred (Jun 22, 2016)

Many people consider their love lives private - even from family members.


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## Sue4473 (May 29, 2018)

I get that. I wasn’t trying to pry. I guess one is really private and at times he only shares certain things. Should I text him I’m sorry or let it go?


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## Evinrude58 (Jun 16, 2014)

Let it go


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## Sue4473 (May 29, 2018)

I will.


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## TheDudeLebowski (Oct 10, 2017)

Guys don't really like to talk about their relationships like women do. You certainly won't see many men, if any at all, ask about someone else's relationship. We honestly don't care. Now, if you present a problem to a man, we will think of a way to fix it. So if you were to ask a man about a specific issue in your relationship, they will talk about it. But we dont really want to just sit around talking about relationships just to talk about them. The idea of taking a thousand needles and slowly one by one pushing them into my eyeballs sounds more pleasant than small talk about relationships with some chick.


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## sokillme (Jun 10, 2016)

Maybe they like you and don't like that they are friendzoned.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*Unless it's a platonic male friend or a relative, they probably don't want to share those details!

I'd recommend saving this topic line for your "girl talk!" *


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## Sue4473 (May 29, 2018)

Wow well when you put it that way lol! I guess I was just curious. A simple yes would’ve sufficed, but ok no biggie. I just hope he’s not ticked. No sticking needles in eyes over here!


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## Evinrude58 (Jun 16, 2014)

I’m sure he’s not even thinking about it.


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## TheDudeLebowski (Oct 10, 2017)

Sue4473 said:


> Wow well when you put it that way lol! I guess I was just curious. A simple yes would’ve sufficed, but ok no biggie. I just hope he’s not ticked. No sticking needles in eyes over here!


Men aren't curious about this stuff. Old joke, but guy goes out to the bar drinking with his buddies. Comes home and the wife/gf asks how was his evening. He talks about this and that and then "Oh yeah, Mike got a divorce" and the wife is all shocked and asks "why?" And of course the man responds, "I dont know" while shrugging his shoulders. The wife/girlfriend is indignant at the idea that a man can learn his best friend got a divorce and knows literally nothing else about it but that. 

Guys just don't ask about relationships.


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## She'sStillGotIt (Jul 30, 2016)

Sue4473 said:


> Wow well when you put it that way lol! I guess I was just curious. A simple yes would’ve sufficed, but ok no biggie. I just hope he’s not ticked. No sticking needles in eyes over here!


It's quite possible they felt a simple 'yes' *wouldn't* have sufficed.


It would have led to "who is it?" and "how did you meet?" and "what's her name, what's she do for a living, where's she live, what's she like?" and "how long have you been seeing her?" and on and on and on. It's just easier to ignore the question then get involved in the soap opera of texting their private lives to you.


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## Edmund (Apr 1, 2017)

TheDudeLebowski said:


> Guys don't really like to talk about their relationships like women do. You certainly won't see many men, if any at all, ask about someone else's relationship. We honestly don't care. *Now, if you present a problem to a man, we will think of a way to fix it.* So if you were to ask a man about a specific issue in your relationship, they will talk about it. But we dont really want to just sit around talking about relationships just to talk about them. The idea of taking a thousand needles and slowly one by one pushing them into my eyeballs sounds more pleasant than small talk about relationships with some chick.


When a woman presents a problem to a man, she does not want the man to fix it, and she will get all worked up over "man-explaining" when you are only trying to be helpful. All she wants is for you to comiserate, like "Yeah that is a really tough problem - I hope you can solve it."

Took me about 50 years to figure this out. But I am a male engineer, the most problem solving of the problem solvers.


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## TheDudeLebowski (Oct 10, 2017)

Edmund said:


> When a woman presents a problem to a man, she does not want the man to fix it, and she will get all worked up over "man-explaining" when you are only trying to be helpful. All she wants is for you to comiserate, like "Yeah that is a really tough problem - I hope you can solve it."
> 
> Took me about 50 years to figure this out. But I am a male engineer, the most problem solving of the problem solvers.


Maybe in your relationships. I've never been accused of man splaining. Maybe you're just a bit of a **** about it sometimes?


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## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

There's a reason people choose not to answer questions. He probably felt it wasn't your concern -- especially if you once dated.


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## Bananapeel (May 4, 2015)

Sue, most guys tend to talk about activities far more than relationships. If you want to get them to talk then ask about a hobby of theirs or a project they are working on, but not their relationships.


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

All of the above

Plus, they still want to sleep with you. 😎


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## jorgegene (May 26, 2012)

ok, i had a friend in junior high school that i would see occasionally. actually, he wasn't so much a friend as the son of my dad's work associate.

every time i saw him, the first thing out of his mouth would be; "how's your love life?"

well, it just so happened that in junior high school i had no love life and therefore, this was tremendously annoying, and i would just say 'ok' every time, cause it was none of his business.

thankfully he would just leave it at that.


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## Sue4473 (May 29, 2018)

Ragnar Ragnasson said:


> All of the above
> 
> Plus, they still want to sleep with you. 😎


In other words- if I answer yes I have a girlfriend that could mess up my chances of sleeping with you?
Yes, I didn’t think about that.
That could be the reason also lol

🤣


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

That's exactly right!


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## Bobby5000 (Oct 19, 2011)

First, do note you are work associates and that if he said the wrong thing he could theoretically jeopardize his job. Imagine if he said something honest that demeaned women or was perceived to be that. Secondly, and related, he could perceive you are coming on to him or alternatively, setting a trap. I have a family member who knows people who related this story. A girl thought to be somewhat loose and flirty was smiling, drinking, and seemingly flirting at a company party. She had a few drinks, he had a few drinks, and later in the night he texted her a somewhat explicit text message. BOOM! Next day he is at HR responding to her complaint, and subsequently gets fired. My friend spotted that this lady was trouble but this guy did not. 

So please do not put your male coworkers in difficult situations, don't ask questions about their love life and do not put the burden upon them to set limits.


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