# what should i do now ?!is it late?



## jennifer22009 (Sep 19, 2009)

as i said in my other thread , my story with my husband who i got marry quick only mone month after we met , he is not from my country , then he stayed with me to make the marriage in my home country and went back straight to his home country in order to start to apply for the spouse application .wich has a part of our problem around 90%because from the time he went around now 11 months and still the procedures of the visa slow ,well we decided to meet online everyday , from the time he come from work untill he go in the morning , then i started to get bored all that perioud 11 months of doing the same things everyday , i felt bore ! plus i didnt want to travell where i wroked in another country where i was there because of the plan we made for our marriage;in the same time he asked to dont work in my mother country also , he have promissed me that i dont need to work because he is going to send me money each week ! then later on he said he have credit bills he can not afford to send me any money !
in fact personnaly it didnt bother me , but i am a person who is indepanant ! and i didnt like the way asking mom to give me all the time 
and he knows well that i am not used to work in my country
all the time i worked was always in a different countries 
but i did sacrifice for him cause he said he will support me ! but he never do ,
so boring and meeting online everday create like kinda stress on me i just fight with him mostlly everday and shouting and closing the line on him as soon as i get of line he start to call me on the phone and ask me to come back and i refuse but when he keep calling i agree 
but later i started to become more tempred because i dont feel secure in the situation i am in 
so i started to tell him , let s divorce he use to cry and say how much he love me , and that he cant leave me 
but everytime i do a mistake wich mean shouting on him and acuuse him of things he dont he use to forgive me
because in fact he knows how much i love him the only things is that i felt always that i am insecure !! and sometimes i doubt on him 
when i use to ask him for divorce and ask him to cancell the application spouse visa in fact i never meant from the bottom of my heart but it comes from the anger and the boring life i was living with him online only !!we never still have a chance to leave together yet in a real life
anyway...to dont be long 
because he forgave me a lot and use to call me sometimes when he had break while he is at work saying to me that he love me he cant take it anymore the way i am dealing with him and argue with him everyday and accuse of things he dont do 
3 weeks ago we had a real serious one 
as usual i said to him let s divorce and i sent a file message wrting things wich is not true 
saying that i dont love him anymore and we should divorce 
in fact i wrote that in order to get his attention back to me like how he was in the begining 
we met online after that we had another fight then i said let s divorce (but never meant it from my heart ) because i knew that he willnot do it cause he used to tell me whateve happen i wont divorce u never 
so he never agree about it 
but that day his answer was if that is what u want lets do it then 
i felt angry inside me because i couldnt believe how he said it 
normally he is the one who say never he will do it 
i thought he was not serious then i said ok and i went offline 
and i come back online and i didnt find him 
i called him on the phone asking him to come online and i told me are u crazy i am not going to leave u and i can not leave u 
and u know well that that is only when i get angry i say things like that !
well from that day he changed he stopped calling me 
he dosnt come online 
i use to ask him to forgive me but this time i did appoliziged cried 
he refuse to forgive me and he said that he will cancell the visa application , we were wating 11 months and we just need few months to finished but he cancell it 
and now he said he will divorce me 
he dosnt call to say when he is going to start the procedures 
and when i call him he just say it is over 
is that mean ? that is he is decission ?
i know i was tuff!! but we also had some good times
i feel strange how could he forget our love that quick 
today i regret ; the way i behave and i am working on myslf to become a better person for him 
i said that to him he say , no he have heard that a lot from me and that i will not change , wich before i use to tell him i will not change lets divorce he use to say no things gonna be fine and u will change 
now he i totally changed i called him 2 days ago he was asleep he asked me to write what i want on the email then i wrote him that even if he cancell the visa still there is hope and i want to save this marriage isuggest to him to come and live with me in my country because i am not ready to leave without ,him i still love him , he dosnt reply 
is that mean ?he is preparing to divorce 
because in his country s law they say that the husband and wife should haveat least a perioud of separation aournd 12 months and maybye he is wating for one month pass to start to divorce ,because he is not calling and he dosnt know anything about me?


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## jennifer22009 (Sep 19, 2009)

yes i forgot another question in case if he wants to divorce 
does he need my signature or not ???thanks for ur help


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## dobo (Jun 30, 2009)

We can't answer your questions about divorce because we don't know where either of you are. 

I think you might as well chalk this up to experience. You can only push a man so far. Further, going through the immigration process is long and expensive and trying enough without a spouse who acts up all of the time. And like I said, if he is in the US he probably knows he doesnt' want to commit to take care of you for 10 years when the relationship probably won't work out, anyway. (I sponsored my husband's CR-1 so I know of what I speak.)


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## jennifer22009 (Sep 19, 2009)

thanks for the answer dobo , i am so sad !!he use before to cry and say how much he loved me 
i behave with him bad lately because of his promises that he use to say and never do 
he promised me that he will make alawyer to make the procedures of the visa quickbut he didnt because he said he have got bill credit then also same thing concerning his promise to come to me and say that he will stay with me untill the visa get approved and travell together and he didnt 
and he asked m to stop my work and i respected his opinion becausehe said i will support u and , he never supported me mom do untill now 
and in the end all the money i spent on the visa and the time 
he did cancell it 
he was fast !!
yestaerday h called me and i said to him it is ok i will sign the paper of divorce and i am planing to go back to the country i was indepandant and working , i just came home to my country only for him , and in the end he just lost my time , if i knew he would be that way 
i wont leave my job for nosense
so of course i get nervous because of that 
but i am a nice person , if i wanst 
do u think he will plan to marry excatelly after one month meeting 
he said that he found such wonderfull things i have but 
he made feel impatient with he being far from me 11 month and obliging mt to contact him online without doing any activity and no work and in the same time he dosnt support me


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