# negative husband complains constantly



## Lynn00 (Aug 8, 2013)

Was hoping for some help here on this forum. My husband and I have been married for 10 years, no kids. THe problem is that my husband has a very negative attitude, he was always a glass half empty kind of guy. Anyway, ever single day he comes home from work and complains about his job and the people he works with. I listen to him and every so often give my opinion .or advice When I've had enough I ask him to stop, he will stop for about an hour and start back up again. Or start again in the morning. If he is not complaining about his job, it's about a physical ailment or something else. Every time we eat he complains about something regarding the food, and when he go out to eat it's either about the service, or he doesn't like the way the place smells, or the kids at the table next to us are annoying. It's gotten to the point where I feel anxious around him all the time and spending time together is not enjoyable. I think it's affecting my health. I have brought this to his attention so many times and he just brushes it off, or he gets mad that I don't want to listen to him and accuses me of not caring. I am at the end of my rope and am about to call it quits on this marriage. Please help!


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## Jamison (Feb 10, 2011)

Negativity/Complaining can come from fears. It may even have something to do with some form of mental illness. It would be good if you were able to find out the reasons behind his negativity. Was his family like this? Perhaps its a learned behavior. Has he always been like this or is it something new? 

I'm sure its draining to be around someone with such a negative attitude. Perhaps you should seek out a counselor for yourself. One that can help you, especially if you feel your health or even mental well being is being tested.


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## Lynn00 (Aug 8, 2013)

I don't know anyone in his family that is negative. I know he has a lot of anger and resentment from his childhood regarding being teased by kids at school, but it couldn't have been that bad because he had a number of friends from HS including some he still keeps in touch with. He has always been like this but lately it's wearing me down, so I do think I need to see a counselor.


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## Jamison (Feb 10, 2011)

Lynn00 said:


> I don't know anyone in his family that is negative. I know he has a lot of anger and resentment from his childhood regarding being teased by kids at school, but it couldn't have been that bad because he had a number of friends from HS including some he still keeps in touch with. He has always been like this but lately it's wearing me down, so I do think I need to see a counselor.


Anger and resentment is not a good thing, it can not only destroy the people around you but the person with the anger and resentment. He was bullied it sounds like, that can have a devastating impact on kids and especially if it was never dealt with and now it spills over into adulthood. Seek out a counselor and then you may want to try to get him to see one as well.


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## A Bit Much (Sep 14, 2011)

Lynn00 said:


> He has always been like this but lately it's wearing me down, so I do think I need to see a counselor.


Go do what you have to do, but if he's ALWAYS been this way, I don't see how you could have looked past it enough to marry him. Upbeat happy people usually don't like being around the negative nelly type for more than a few hours (if that).


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## JustHer (Mar 12, 2013)

He could have a type of depression. If he has been this way for 10 years likely he is not going to change, but you can change the way you respond to him.

You can:
1. Put him on the clock. Tell him he has 10 minutes in which he can complain and then he must only say positive things for the rest of the night.
2. Put an empty chair out, let him know that if he needs to complain he can tell it to the chair all he wants, but not to you.
3. You can quit engaging in the conversation by saying things like "that's too bad" and then change the subject.

He might need counseling.


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## Lynn00 (Aug 8, 2013)

A Bit Much said:


> Go do what you have to do, but if he's ALWAYS been this way, I don't see how you could have looked past it enough to marry him. Upbeat happy people usually don't like being around the negative nelly type for more than a few hours (if that).


Our relationship started out as a long distance relationship so we didn't spend that much time together regularly. When we finally moved in together, he took a job that required him to travel 4 days out of the week, so again, I wasn't spending that much time with him. Past 6 years he's been at this job and he's home every night. He hates the job and complains but won't leave. He's finally looking at other job prospects but constantly talks about how no other company will want him due to outdated skills and he'd have to take a paycut. He went on one interview and didn't get the job so he stopped looking for about 6 months because he deemed himself unemployable due to one rejection.

I hardly ever talk about work to him unless there's a funny story that happened or a really notable situation. Work stays at work as far as I'm concerned.

My friends call him "Debby Downer" so I know I'm not just imagining things!


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## Lynn00 (Aug 8, 2013)

JustHer said:


> He could have a type of depression. If he has been this way for 10 years likely he is not going to change, but you can change the way you respond to him.
> 
> You can:
> 1. Put him on the clock. Tell him he has 10 minutes in which he can complain and then he must only say positive things for the rest of the night.
> ...


Great suggestions, thanks!


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## AgentD (Dec 27, 2010)

My MIL is like that. Glad I don't live with her, I try to distance myself from people like that as much as possible. 

Is he negative about sex too? Does he not find in happiness in anything? Does he have any hobbies?


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## A Bit Much (Sep 14, 2011)

Lynn00 said:


> O*ur relationship started out as a long distance relationship so we didn't spend that much time together regularly. * When we finally moved in together, he took a job that required him to *travel 4 days out of the week*, so again, I wasn't spending that much time with him. Past 6 years he's been at this job and he's home every night. He hates the job and complains but won't leave. He's finally looking at other job prospects but constantly talks about how no other company will want him due to outdated skills and he'd have to take a paycut. He went on one interview and didn't get the job so he stopped looking for about 6 months because he deemed himself unemployable due to one rejection.
> 
> I hardly ever talk about work to him unless there's a funny story that happened or a really notable situation. Work stays at work as far as I'm concerned.
> 
> My friends call him "Debby Downer" so I know I'm not just imagining things!


Well that explains plenty. You really didn't know him when you married him.


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## Lynn00 (Aug 8, 2013)

Sex is one thing he does enjoy, but it's hard for me to get in the mood with all the gloom and doom. He has hobbies, he likes cars, video games and going to the movies. If he were clinically depressed than he wouldn't enjoy those things, right?

_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## AgentD (Dec 27, 2010)

Lynn00 said:


> Sex is one thing he does enjoy, but it's hard for me to get in the mood with all the gloom and doom. He has hobbies, he likes cars, video games and going to the movies. If he were clinically depressed than he wouldn't enjoy those things, right?
> 
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


But does he complain about any of those things?


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## Sanity (Mar 7, 2011)

He might want to look at other career options. Can he look at something else or maybe start a side business? Small victories help heal faster than waiting for the "big one".


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## Lynn00 (Aug 8, 2013)

He does not really complain about those things, no.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Mavash. (Jan 26, 2012)

A friend of mine went through this. She married a man who worked all the time and then he got a new job where he was home more. THAT was when the problems started. She saw then how negative and depressed he really was. He went to a few MC sessions where the therapist said it was obvious he was depressed. He was prescribed meds but he quit taking them despite them working.

They ended up divorced because he refused to do anything about the problem. 

Being around negative people isn't sustainable long term. They will absolutely make you sick both physically and mentally if you stay.


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## 3Xnocharm (Jun 22, 2012)

Lynn00 said:


> Was hoping for some help here on this forum. My husband and I have been married for 10 years, no kids. THe problem is that my husband has a very negative attitude, he was always a glass half empty kind of guy. Anyway, ever single day he comes home from work and complains about his job and the people he works with. I listen to him and every so often give my opinion .or advice When I've had enough I ask him to stop, he will stop for about an hour and start back up again. Or start again in the morning. If he is not complaining about his job, it's about a physical ailment or something else. Every time we eat he complains about something regarding the food, and when he go out to eat it's either about the service, or he doesn't like the way the place smells, or the kids at the table next to us are annoying. It's gotten to the point where I feel anxious around him all the time and spending time together is not enjoyable. I think it's affecting my health. I have brought this to his attention so many times and he just brushes it off, or he gets mad that I don't want to listen to him and accuses me of not caring. I am at the end of my rope and am about to call it quits on this marriage. Please help!


OMG this is like looking in a mirror! My second husband was exactly this same way! He hated everything and everybody! I got to the point that I stopped cooking at home because he b!tched about everything that I made. I tried to avoid going ANYWHERE with him because, he would rage at traffic, he would gripe in the parking lot about no spaces or how other people parked. Once we get in somewhere, its too hot or cold, too noisy, too bright, people are stupid...you get the idea. He was embarrassing to be with in public. I hated watching tv with him because he b!tched about everything on tv, even shows he liked, and if we watched some thing I wanted to, he complained so much the entire time, I would finally just tell him to turn it. He didnt like my hobbies, didnt like my clothes, my driving, my hair, my cooking, my cleaning, griped about my daughter. I basically checked out of life by the end of the marriage, living this way is exhausting. 

He was not like this when we met, I am convinced I was a victim of the ol' bait n switch. It crept up, getting more and more prevalent as time went by. And even now, he is the exact same way. I guarantee you will never get him into counseling with you, its the rest of the world that is screwed up, not him.


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## Joannam (Aug 1, 2013)

Lynn00 said:


> Was hoping for some help here on this forum. My husband and I have been married for 10 years, no kids. THe problem is that my husband has a very negative attitude, he was always a glass half empty kind of guy. Anyway, ever single day he comes home from work and complains about his job and the people he works with. I listen to him and every so often give my opinion .or advice When I've had enough I ask him to stop, he will stop for about an hour and start back up again. Or start again in the morning. If he is not complaining about his job, it's about a physical ailment or something else. Every time we eat he complains about something regarding the food, and when he go out to eat it's either about the service, or he doesn't like the way the place smells, or the kids at the table next to us are annoying. It's gotten to the point where I feel anxious around him all the time and spending time together is not enjoyable. I think it's affecting my health. I have brought this to his attention so many times and he just brushes it off, or he gets mad that I don't want to listen to him and accuses me of not caring. I am at the end of my rope and am about to call it quits on this marriage. Please help!


I was with a man for a few years just the same jeez could he complain.....best part was he used to say it was me being negative... In the end I had to end it he was never gonna change or even admit he is negative. I think if he is really bringing you down all the time then maybe see if you can take a break from him. Tell him why....maybe take notes over a week of all the negative comments and then put it in a email to him so that he can actually see what it is like if he reads it. Maybe it will give him a clearer picture of what he does and why it affects you. You don't say if you really still love him?????? It may be wise to try and also understand how you feel about him too and why are you staying.


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## scatty (Mar 15, 2013)

Well, it seems like this is just how he is. The question is if you want to live the rest of your life like this?


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## Lynn00 (Aug 8, 2013)

Gotta say it's a relief to know that others have experienced the same thing, i started doubting my own sanity!! No I cannot live the rest of my life like this. I do love him but I wonder how much he can really love me if he doesn't love himself and "hates people" like he claims. If he loved me, wouldn't he care not to burden me with all his complaints despite my protests or is that the wrong way of thinking?


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## evenstar (Jul 26, 2013)

Wow this would really drain me too... when people at work complain too much it makes me totally cranky. And I'm not married to them.

Sounds like you do need really firm boundaries (the 10 minute rule and then NO coming back to it later) - if he complains about the same things over and over refuse to listen to it and ask him what he's going to do about it - and tell him for every negative thing he has to tell you three positive things or you won't listen any more. Anyone can do that if they try.

"I hate people" 
"I have a wife who loves me"
"I am lucky to have a job so I can support myself"
"I like the candy bars in the vending machine"

I was married to one of those Kings of Negativity, and about the only emotion I had when we split up was relief. I hope you don't have to go that route. But it's really unlikely he'll change.


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## bubbly girl (Oct 11, 2011)

Lynn00 said:


> Our relationship started out as a long distance relationship so we didn't spend that much time together regularly. When we finally moved in together, he took a job that required him to travel 4 days out of the week, so again, I wasn't spending that much time with him. Past 6 years he's been at this job and he's home every night. * He hates the job* and complains but won't leave. He's finally looking at other job prospects but* constantly talks about how no other company will want him due to outdated skills and he'd have to take a paycut*. He went on one interview and didn't get the job so he *stopped looking for about 6 months because he deemed himself unemployable due to one rejection.*
> 
> I hardly ever talk about work to him unless there's a funny story that happened or a really notable situation. Work stays at work as far as I'm concerned.
> 
> My friends call him "Debby Downer" so I know I'm not just imagining things!


All the things I bolded point to low self esteem. It could stem from being bullied back in school.

There are times my husband would get in one of his grouchy moods and everything out of his mouth was negative. It is indeed draining. I tell him to stop complaining and point out all the good things he isn't noticing & enjoying.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

evenstar said:


> Wow this would really drain me too... when people at work complain too much it makes me totally cranky. And I'm not married to them.
> 
> Sounds like you do need really firm boundaries (the 10 minute rule and then NO coming back to it later) - if he complains about the same things over and over refuse to listen to it and ask him what he's going to do about it - and tell him for every negative thing he has to tell you three positive things or you won't listen any more. Anyone can do that if they try.
> 
> ...


WOW, a "KING of Negativity", and when you say it I'm sure you mean it. Some negative interactions and feedback, that could sap the entire drive out of nearly anyone, can put weight on you like lead.


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## CallaLily (Jan 13, 2011)

Lynn00 said:


> If he loved me, wouldn't he care not to burden me with all his complaints despite my protests or is that the wrong way of thinking?


Not if he is a Narcissistic person. All that matters is what he thinks and how he feels.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Maybe it's just who he is.

My older daughter is that way. Since she could talk. I bring it to her attention but it's just who she is.

His "complaining" is maybe his way of wanting to connect with you. Venting maybe is how he feels like he's connecting emotionally.

It has taken me 14 years to deal with my negative nancy daughter  It drives me crazy at times, but she's just a "half empty" type of person.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

CallaLily said:


> Not if he is a Narcissistic person. All that matters is what he thinks and how he feels.


Well we know that the world revolves around how he feels.


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## Lynn00 (Aug 8, 2013)

that_girl said:


> Maybe it's just who he is.
> 
> 
> His "complaining" is maybe his way of wanting to connect with you. Venting maybe is how he feels like he's connecting emotionally.


Yes, I think that is true! And he is hurt by the fact that I don't want to listen to all of it. He says "fine, then I just won't talk!"


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## KathyBatesel (Apr 26, 2012)

Lynn00 said:


> Yes, I think that is true! And he is hurt by the fact that I don't want to listen to all of it. He says "fine, then I just won't talk!"


This really is it... I am a negative person by nature, too. I have also loved someone who was similar. 

What is it about his complaining that bothers you? My guess would be that maybe you let it affect how YOU feel. You have a choice in this, though. You could recognize it for what it is and let it slide off your back. I've found that when I am this way and I hear my husband say, "I know you'll figure out how to solve the problem" or "It will be ok, and a few months from now you won't remember it" or "Honey, you're right, you're being mistreated" I feel very loved. When I feel loved that way, it's like a switch flips and I start to appreciate my husband instead of focusing on what I'm not liking at the moment. 

However, I've found very few people who can separate and respond to me without letting themselves get personally invested. It's like they think my complaints are about them, or that I will get mad if they don't solve my problems. 

I wish I could describe how to respond from your head without letting your own emotions and ego get tied into his complaining, but I am not sure I can. When I was married to another complainer, it never bothered me to hear it even though it drove my kids nuts. Sigh....

I will say just one more thing... I wouldn't encourage setting up "rules" or time limits unless you want to introduce power struggles and resentment to your relationship.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

Lynn00 said:


> Yes, I think that is true! And he is hurt by the fact that I don't want to listen to all of it. He says "fine, then I just won't talk!"


How can you help him to get on a positive viewpoint?


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## Lynn00 (Aug 8, 2013)

KathyBatesel said:


> This really is it... I am a negative person by nature, too. I have also loved someone who was similar.
> 
> What is it about his complaining that bothers you? My guess would be that maybe you let it affect how YOU feel. You have a choice in this, though. You could recognize it for what it is and let it slide off your back. I've found that when I am this way and I hear my husband say, "I know you'll figure out how to solve the problem" or "It will be ok, and a few months from now you won't remember it" or "Honey, you're right, you're being mistreated" I feel very loved. When I feel loved that way, it's like a switch flips and I start to appreciate my husband instead of focusing on what I'm not liking at the moment.
> 
> ...


I try to give supportive responses but then I just get tired of it. It does affect me emotionally. I do see your point about the time limits and how that could create more resentment problems. It would also be nice if he asked me how my day was every once in a while... If I ever complain to him about something work related he ends up making me feel worse because of his negative spin on everything!


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## Blondilocks (Jul 4, 2013)

It seems he requires a lot of attention. Apparently, complaining is his go-to mechanism of ensuring the spotlight is on him. What he doesn't understand is that after awhile the listener feels the is air being sucked out of the room and their life force draining.

My BIL 's sole source of enjoyment since his wife died is calling everyone (that's everyone who will still take his calls) and whining about his loneliness. Doesn't want suggestions etc. Just wants to be listened to. What he is craving is the undivided attention of another person. What he doesn't understand is that people have their own problems and don't like being a dumping ground for another's.


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## Theseus (Feb 22, 2013)

Lynn00 said:


> I have brought this to his attention so many times and he just brushes it off, or he gets mad that I don't want to listen to him and accuses me of not caring. I am at the end of my rope and am about to call it quits on this marriage. Please help!



My wife did this for a long time during the early years of our marriage, and it was driving me nuts. One thing that helped was changing the emphasis from "too much negative comments" to "not enough positive comments". To put it another way, I gave up trying to stop her complaining, but I told her that life is a balance and I could tolerate all of her complaints much better if she made an equal number of positive comments to balance it out. 

I remember one day we pulled into a grocery store parking lot and I was at my wits end with her complaints about everything under the sun. I told her I wasn't leaving the car until she could say just ONE positive thing about anything! She really couldn't think of anything, and we were sitting in that car for 45 minutes before she could think of something positive. Yes, it took that long. OK, this was an immature and ridiculous way to handle it, but it worked. After that, she seemed to realize that our lives weren't 100% bad, so why was she being 100% negative? Things weren't perfect, but we certainly weren't living in a North Korean prison camp.


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## KathyBatesel (Apr 26, 2012)

Theseus said:


> My wife did this for a long time during the early years of our marriage, and it was driving me nuts. One thing that helped was changing the emphasis from "too much negative comments" to "not enough positive comments". To put it another way, I gave up trying to stop her complaining, but I told her that life is a balance and I could tolerate all of her complaints much better if she made an equal number of positive comments to balance it out.
> 
> I remember one day we pulled into a grocery store parking lot and I was at my wits end with her complaints about everything under the sun. I told her I wasn't leaving the car until she could say just ONE positive thing about anything! She really couldn't think of anything, and we were sitting in that car for 45 minutes before she could think of something positive. Yes, it took that long. OK, this was an immature and ridiculous way to handle it, but it worked. After that, she seemed to realize that our lives weren't 100% bad, so why was she being 100% negative? Things weren't perfect, but we certainly weren't living in a North Korean prison camp.



LOL... that was my ex, too. I found a little bit of success with asking him, "So what's good right now?" and waiting until he answered. It did get to a point where he became able to answer without it taking forever, but it did not change his basic outlook. 

Something is occurring to me as I'm reading replies. Someone (Blondilocks, perhaps?) said this husband may be this way to keep the spotlight on him, which would seem true if he rarely inquires about others' days, etc. However, it might also be that he expects others to share what they want to without him asking about it, just as he seems to do now. Or perhaps there is an entirely different reason, such as low self-esteem or a mood disorder like dysthymia.


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## JustHer (Mar 12, 2013)

KathyBatesel said:


> This really is it... I am a negative person by nature, too. I have also loved someone who was similar.
> 
> *What is it about his complaining that bothers you?* My guess would be that maybe you let it affect how YOU feel. You have a choice in this, though. You could recognize it for what it is and let it slide off your back. I've found that when I am this way and I hear my husband say, "I know you'll figure out how to solve the problem" or "It will be ok, and a few months from now you won't remember it" or "Honey, you're right, you're being mistreated" I feel very loved. When I feel loved that way, it's like a switch flips and I start to appreciate my husband instead of focusing on what I'm not liking at the moment.
> 
> ...


In my opinion, everyone has an energy the carry with them. This energy affects the people around them, whether we like it or not. Most people can only take so much negative energy, it is draining and it does affect how we feel. I have one son that complains about everything. His negative attitude affected the whole family, the atmosphere of the home and even the attitudes of the rest of us when we were around him. Most people can only take so much of it before we are ready to pull our hair out.

I think humans instinctively want to be happy and want to be around happy people. It feels good. When we go out to dinner, we want to enjoy it, not listen to someone complain. When we come home from work, we want to spend a relaxed, enjoyable time with our spouse, not listen to them complain day after day. It can get tiring never getting to enjoy anything because this person you are with is ALWAYS complaining. 

Kathy, I am very happy for you that your husband is the type of person that can let it roll off and make you feel loved. I think most of us try to do this, for a while, but after years of trying and nothing ever changing, it can get to be too much.


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## KathyBatesel (Apr 26, 2012)

JustHer said:


> In my opinion, everyone has an energy the carry with them. This energy affects the people around them, whether we like it or not. Most people can only take so much negative energy, it is draining and it does affect how we feel. I have one son that complains about everything. His negative attitude affected the whole family, the atmosphere of the home and even the attitudes of the rest of us when we were around him. Most people can only take so much of it before we are ready to pull our hair out.
> 
> I think humans instinctively want to be happy and want to be around happy people. It feels good. When we go out to dinner, we want to enjoy it, not listen to someone complain. When we come home from work, we want to spend a relaxed, enjoyable time with our spouse, not listen to them complain day after day. It can get tiring never getting to enjoy anything because this person you are with is ALWAYS complaining.
> 
> Kathy, I am very happy for you that your husband is the type of person that can let it roll off and make you feel loved. I think most of us try to do this, for a while, but after years of trying and nothing ever changing, it can get to be too much.


I agree with this in general, but I do think it is possible for us to adapt, too, and not "fake it" for years but learn to genuinely not be bothered.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Lynn00 said:


> Yes, I think that is true! And he is hurt by the fact that I don't want to listen to all of it. He says "fine, then I just won't talk!"


That's my kid too. and i say, Ok. lol no codependency here!


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## Mavash. (Jan 26, 2012)

I tend to be negative and my son is also negative. 

That said I'm smart enough to realize that this behavior pushes people away. With therapy I have learned to be more positive. I've also worked with my son too. There needs to be balance. Yes it's how we connect but it's also how we suck the life out of people. Totally counterproductive.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

I never would have thought that, Mavash


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## Mavash. (Jan 26, 2012)

that_girl said:


> I never would have thought that, Mavash


Thanks for the compliment. 

It's a gift and a curse that I see everything that is bad in this world.

I've since healed and channel my insights into something good instead of wallowing.

My negativity came from feeling powerless which I no longer am. 

Finding spirituality helped me see purpose in the bad.

That helps me cope.


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## Emerald (Aug 2, 2012)

I'm concerned that your husband doesn't seem to care about your feelings - how much his negativity bothers you to the point where you are thinking of ending your marriage.

He also doesn't respect your wishes for him to stop complaining about his job so much. It's almost like he has a compulsion to do it no matter the consequences.

His complaining could be a cry for help - he may be depressed - it is worth seeing a doctor for a dx.

I suggest marriage counseling. Maybe a 3rd party intervention is in order.


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## trey69 (Dec 29, 2010)

For every negative complaint he has, you try to mention something positive. Might not change his negative mind, but it may help you to be more positive and keep you from taking things so personally. It is hard to not take things personally when especially when you live in the same house with a person who displays a negative attitude or damaging behavior. So say something positive, then go about your day. As in don't hang around the negativity to long if you can help it, go find something else to do for awhile. Sometimes people need breaks.


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## Lynn00 (Aug 8, 2013)

I think going to counseling would help him but of course he has a negative view of counseling and "shrinks" so that doesn't help. I made an appointment for myself becase I find that I am getting anxious and depressed. I think I have a tendency to be codependent. When he is complaining I empathize with him and it bothers me that he is not happy. When I complain he gets annoyed, although I have noticed he is getting better at listening to me if I have a gripe since I've pointed it out.


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## Spinner (Jul 26, 2013)

It sounds like you need to establish a zero tolerance ban on complaining. Or at least the things he refuses to do anything about. I'd suggest reading the book Boundaries.

A little perspective, I used to be a VERY negative person. I just didn't know better. It's hard for a person to learn to be positive, but it can be done! My favourite thing was listening to The Power of Positive Thinking (cheesy, I know lol) on cassettes while I drove. They really helped me to be less of a downer.


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## tryingtobebetter (Aug 6, 2012)

My self-treatment for feeling sorry for myself is to go to help with the sick at Lourdes whenever I can.

People paralysed from birth, stroke victims, others who cannot even feed themselves. Helping them for a week, pushing them in wheelchairs etc. is very therapeutic. It teaches you to count your blessings.

What is truly impressive is how cheerful so many of them are. That is so humbling. They have so much worse problems than me and yet are cheerful!

It is good to be humbled, as it teaches humility.

Perhaps your husband could find some people whose problems are worse than his?


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## betty boop (Dec 12, 2016)

I've been married for 34 plus years and work two jobs. My husband retired 5 years ago and has COPD and very bored. I'm a people person and always on the go. He still smokes. Nothing I do is right he complains about everything. I'm not a good wife or mother. I've raised three boys and they are grown. I've always giving up my life to make him happy.
Please Please help


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