# How many of y'all feel like this?



## jnyu44 (Feb 13, 2012)

How many of you guys feel like life just sucks sometimes? You go to work, take a bunch of s*, then you get on a crowded and smelly bus, go home, then take a bunch of s* from your wife? Then on weekends you have the pleasure of taking more s* from family. You can't really express how you feel b/c your wife is easily offended and anything you say can and will likely be misconstrued as an attack. So you just kinda keep your mouth shut, try to help out with the kid, bring in a high income, and try to be as nice as you can to someone who thinks you're trying to screw her all the time. Remind me again why we're sticking it out?

Who's fought this out for a couple decades? Has it been worth it in any case? I love my child to no end, but sometimes I wonder if it's worth trying to hash it out with his mother.


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## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

I think everyone feels a bit of this from time to time. But how long have you been feeling this way? You only get one shot at life so being perpetually unhappy doesn't make sense to me.


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

You said in your other thread that you have a newborn. That's a tough time for all..... you've got to suck some things up for a little while. That might mean you don't get a ton of sex while your baby wakes up every two hours. 

I really hope there's more to it then that and you're not throwing a fit over a cranky wife with a newborn. It's pretty unattractive when you're healing from childbirth and not sleeping while taking care of a newborn and your hb is throwing a fit over sex and not helping much because he's had a hard day at work. 

I have a pretty demanding job and it pales in comparison to taking care of newborns.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

I've had brief moments where I thought life sucked and then I recalled all those dead 19 year old soldiers and those with missing limbs. I recalled that there were Americans thousands of miles away from their homes and families, sucking that nasty Iraq and Afghanistan dust, in 130 degree heat. My challenges suddenly didn't seem quite as daunting. 
I don't take crap from the wife or anyone else because I don't have to and once you start, it's just an invitation for them to give you more. If someone wishes to be offended or pissed, it's their right but it places no burden on me to blow powder sugar up their behind. 
If your wife seriously believed you were the bane of her existence, she'd be gone, so she can put her guilt club away, remove her butt from atop her head, and cheerfully participate in the marriage which she has willingly involved herself in every day since the wedding.


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

unbelievable said:


> I've had brief moments where I thought life sucked and then I recalled all those dead 19 year old soldiers and those with missing limbs. I recalled that there were Americans thousands of miles away from their homes and families, sucking that nasty Iraq and Afghanistan dust, in 130 degree heat. My challenges suddenly didn't seem quite as daunting.
> I don't take crap from the wife or anyone else because I don't have to and once you start, it's just an invitation for them to give you more. If someone wishes to be offended or pissed, it's their right but it places no burden on me to blow powder sugar up their behind.
> If your wife seriously believed you were the bane of her existence, she'd be gone, so she can put her guilt club away, remove her butt from atop her head, and cheerfully participate in the marriage which she has willingly involved herself in every day since the wedding.


Well said. Great post. Not to minimize OPs situation, but it could be way worse.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

I used to feel this way but after a life changing event (my old lady cheated) I say phuck it...phuck her, phuck them and phuck my self for letting others define me!

Now I can walk around with a smile on my face and a positive heart....why ...cuz there are other out there that think just like me and even my old lady likes the new me....she better or she will be looking for a place to sleep.

These days I laugh at a lot of folks cuz they are just so unhappy.

It doesn't have to be that way when the important shyt in life is just being positve no matter how smelly the bus is....in the end you will get off the bus while the rest of them break out the check book to pay for gas, insurance and oil changes.

As far as your old lady goes she has choices just like you do....get the phuck out if you don't like it! I'm not talking literaly, but having the additude that...and I quote..." I'll be fine with out you, so stop pushing me away"

To many phuckers look at the glass half empty! NOT ME BROTHER NO WAY IN HELL...life is to short for that kind shyt!!!!!


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## MarriedDude (Jun 21, 2014)

jnyu44 said:


> How many of you guys feel like life just sucks sometimes? You go to work, take a bunch of s*, then you get on a crowded and smelly bus, go home, then take a bunch of s* from your wife? Then on weekends you have the pleasure of taking more s* from family. You can't really express how you feel b/c your wife is easily offended and anything you say can and will likely be misconstrued as an attack. So you just kinda keep your mouth shut, try to help out with the kid, bring in a high income, and try to be as nice as you can to someone who thinks you're trying to screw her all the time. Remind me again why we're sticking it out?
> 
> Who's fought this out for a couple decades? Has it been worth it in any case? I love my child to no end, but sometimes I wonder if it's worth trying to hash it out with his mother.


Been Married for almost 25 years now...so yeah -I hear ya. 

There will be good years and not so good years. The one thing you need to see it all clearly is perspective...which is the one thing that young men typically don't have. 

You only really have 80 or 90 years to kick around on this little planet we call home. Doing things you don't like kinda comes with the whole marriage and breeding thing...but even those parts don't last forever...you won't believe how fast it feels like 20 years goes by. Whoosh...its gone. 

So what you really need to ask yourself is this...

How do I want to live my life? On my feet moving forward -or on my knees begging? I'm not one for begging so i say grab this life you have and squeeze every little bit of experience, love, happiness and yes...struggle -out of it you can.

Because when you are on your death bed....You won't be saying you wished you would have worked more, or you wish you would have kissed more ass.....You will have wished you would have done the things you wanted to do. Why wait.


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

No matter who you hook up with, life won't always be fun. That's why we take vows...to compel us to stay in the game when we'd rather be doing something else. If you yield to someone's crappy disposition, you are guaranteeing that you will only get more of it because you are training them that their bullying BS works on you.


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## jnyu44 (Feb 13, 2012)

unbelievable said:


> I've had brief moments where I thought life sucked and then I recalled all those dead 19 year old soldiers and those with missing limbs. I recalled that there were Americans thousands of miles away from their homes and families, sucking that nasty Iraq and Afghanistan dust, in 130 degree heat. My challenges suddenly didn't seem quite as daunting.
> I don't take crap from the wife or anyone else because I don't have to and once you start, it's just an invitation for them to give you more. If someone wishes to be offended or pissed, it's their right but it places no burden on me to blow powder sugar up their behind.
> If your wife seriously believed you were the bane of her existence, she'd be gone, so she can put her guilt club away, remove her butt from atop her head, and cheerfully participate in the marriage which she has willingly involved herself in every day since the wedding.


Sure, a temporary reminder like that always helps. It doesn't fix anything though. You could be sentenced to jail for 5 years, but hey at least you weren't a POW for 35 years! 

Some people do stay married to people they hate  Think you could find plenty of examples...anyway thanks for your insight though.


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## quiesedba (Apr 19, 2015)

been 20 years... some good some bad.... got married at 27 wish I was still single


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## thatbpguy (Dec 24, 2012)

There's a reason why people marry- they love each other. They have to choose to either stay in love (ie, work on the relationship) or to no stay in love.

Maybe work on staying in love and things will get better.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

Been married for 25 yrs.....the last 5 of them i just got done with the shyt tests from the bus driver , the co workers and even the wife.

Phuckers will keep pushing you around if you let them. One doesn't have to be a @ss about it...one can just agree to not agreeand inform them you don't see it the way they do.
Then it's up to them how they want to deal with their own additude.

It's time for you to read "No More Mr. Nice guy"


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

jnyu44 said:


> Sure, a temporary reminder like that always helps. It doesn't fix anything though. You could be sentenced to jail for 5 years, but hey at least you weren't a POW for 35 years!
> 
> Some people do stay married to people they hate  Think you could find plenty of examples...anyway thanks for your insight though.


Whether you are in hell or in Disneyland, if you believe life sucks, it does. If you believe it's pretty good, it is. You have a great deal of power over your own happiness. You also have near total power over how others treat you. I've never met your wife but I expect there are aspects about her that you appreciate. You can choose to focus on those or you can choose to focus on those aspects you don't appreciate. 

There are happy people in jail and there are miserable people who are free as the wind. Their prisons are of their own construction. You can leave but you haven't. That makes you in charge of your position. Once you recognize that, your wife isn't doing anything to oppress you. You are there because that's where you wish to be. Other people can't make you content or miserable. Contentment is a choice. 

Might your life be easier or better had you made different choices? Possibly. Might it suck a whole lot more? That's also possible. 

You apparently have a good job. Others don't. Some would love to work but are disabled. I believe you have at least one child, presumably healthy. Others aren't as blessed. You seem to have your head screwed on straight but a whole bunch of folks live with mental illness or addictions. You have a home to go to. Others live outdoors. You could be one of them someday. Your wife might not be completely wonderful but she's alive and probably reasonably sane. With a little counseling or communication, you both could turn this thing around. When one's wife is in the ground or in a mental institution or in prison, relationships are harder to repair.
If you think about it, you will probably agree that some pretty good stuff has been put on your plate. Maybe a step toward fixing whatever is wrong lies in recognizing and appreciating what is right and realizing it's worth fighting for and that your life could very easily suck a whole lot more. There are folks living with physically abusive spouses, criminals, sociopaths, hopelessly ill spouses. If you ditched the wife you have with the expectation of finding some other woman, you could end up with one that makes your current wife look damned good. Living with anyone involves drama and conflict.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

jnyu44 said:


> So you just kinda keep your mouth shut, .


Not anymore!
Communicate, set boundaries, and listen.....your old lady has the choice to do the same or not...but that's her choice...you have no control over that, so why even go there.

Again a statement needs to be made.."you don't see it that way".

And one more thing... call the transit authority and tell them bus 123 on route 456 smells like shyt...every phucking day!!!!


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## jnyu44 (Feb 13, 2012)

unbelievable said:


> Whether you are in hell or in Disneyland, if you believe life sucks, it does. If you believe it's pretty good, it is. You have a great deal of power over your own happiness. You also have near total power over how others treat you. I've never met your wife but I expect there are aspects about her that you appreciate. You can choose to focus on those or you can choose to focus on those aspects you don't appreciate.
> 
> There are happy people in jail and there are miserable people who are free as the wind. Their prisons are of their own construction. You can leave but you haven't. That makes you in charge of your position. Once you recognize that, your wife isn't doing anything to oppress you. You are there because that's where you wish to be. Other people can't make you content or miserable. Contentment is a choice.
> 
> ...


Yea I'm with you on that. I do believe happiness is a choice and yea you can ignore all the negativity and focus on the good. Appreciation goes a long way to feeling better. But man there are those days I just want to drive for hours and stay away for a while.


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## jnyu44 (Feb 13, 2012)

the guy said:


> Not anymore!
> Communicate, set boundaries, and listen.....your old lady has the choice to do the same or not...but that's her choice...you have no control over that, so why even go there.
> 
> Again a statement needs to be made.."you don't see it that way".
> ...


hahah! Transit authority actually taking action? What Utopia do you live in?? hahah

I'm a nice guy but I'm not mr. nice guy. Working on a floor with a bunch of alpha males beats that out of you. Kill or be killed, everyone is "nice" but really no one cares. Are you useful enough for them to spend time with you? 15min worth? 30min worth? Monthly? Quarterly? Squeal until they hear you, toot your own horn, or in the end no one sees your value. What do they care? They'll replace you with an eager, green, ivy-league grad in an heartbeat anyway. 

Used to want to work all the time and make a ton of money. After a few years, I realized that when you go down that path you likely end up with relatives who could care less about you but are thinkin' about how your money should be split amongst them. No thanks. Daddy's gonna be broke, but he's gonna be around. Either way, I go to the grave without a penny


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## RClawson (Sep 19, 2011)

lifeistooshort said:


> You said in your other thread that you have a newborn. That's a tough time for all..... you've got to suck some things up for a little while. That might mean you don't get a ton of sex while your baby wakes up every two hours.
> 
> I really hope there's more to it then that and you're not throwing a fit over a cranky wife with a newborn. It's pretty unattractive when you're healing from childbirth and not sleeping while taking care of a newborn and your hb is throwing a fit over sex and not helping much because he's had a hard day at work.
> 
> ...


What now you people have a hidden camera tailing me night and day?


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