# Need Some Help with being Sexy



## liamfry (Jul 22, 2014)

So, I'm gunna post this here because I think men would better understand what I'm trying to say and how to fix it.

My girlfriend feels that she wears sexy things for me and that I don't reciprocate. I can understand what she's saying, and she's right, but I just don't know how to dress "sexily". I have some self-image issues, which doesn't help the issue.

So, my question is this: are there certain things that I can get that will make her feel like I'm putting out, and how can I dress more sexy for her?

Thanks for any and all help. Much appreciated.


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## Rowan (Apr 3, 2012)

It might be most helpful to talk to your girlfriend and find out what sorts of things _she_ means by "sexy" and what she'd like to see you in. 

Does she want to see you in a well fitting suit? Or is it more that she'd love it if you'd wear something other than the 15 year old "beer pong champ" t-shirt and ratty shorts that seem to have become your uniform when you're hanging out at home? Or, is she wanting to see you in sexy underwear or costumes?

"Sexy" can cover a lot of ground.


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## Faeleaf (Jul 22, 2014)

The sexiest thing you can put on is confidence. 

You can fake confidence, while you're learning how to really feel it. Just don't go overboard into arrogance.


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## Sunburn (Jul 9, 2012)

sounds like your girlfriend wants you to be her girlfriend


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## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good evening liamfry
You've got to find out what it is she likes - the only way is to ask. Does she want James Bond style suites? Does she want cowboy boots and a hat? Maybe just jeans and nothing else? Or maybe silk boxers? Is she talking about private dress, or how you dress when you go out?

If she dresses for you, its fine to dress for her, but she has to give you a hint. 

Its easier for women - skimpy see-through stuff pretty much always works.


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## FormerSelf (Apr 21, 2013)

Seek out clothes that actually fit. Don't go to supercuts...and get maybe a new hairstyle, like some Don Draper-esque that seems to be very popular. Seek a style that fits you best, that is authentic so you aren't a fish out of water, but also try to level up at the same time, ya know?

Appearance and hygiene is big, but confidence is definitely The Force behind her wanting to tear your clothes off.


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## roostr (Oct 20, 2012)

Get some speedos, j/k.......I don't know, men don't dress up like that for bed. Ask her what she is talking about.


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

A Batman costume - works like a charm. 

Really though, confidence and taking pride in your appearance is sexy - granted that's up to interpretation. What's her idea of men dressing sexily and does that fit with who you are?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

liamfry said:


> So, I'm gunna post this here because I think men would better understand what I'm trying to say and how to fix it.
> 
> My girlfriend feels that she wears sexy things for me and that I don't reciprocate. I can understand what she's saying, and she's right, but I just don't know how to dress "sexily". I have some self-image issues, which doesn't help the issue.
> 
> ...


Depends on your age / her age and what she views as sexy.

Metro fashion is in now ,slim , sleek and sexy.

But I think that every man should develop his very own sense of style, what looks good on him.
Sometimes too, men get stuck in a certain era / comfort zone with clothes so it's hard to come out of it.

Maybe you can visit an exclusive gents store and they'll give you some great advice on clothing.

Here's a great men's fashion website

Men's Fashion & Style | Entertainment & Sports News | Girls | - GQ.COM (UK)


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## NextTimeAround (Dec 15, 2011)

askmen.com also offers lifestyle advice to men.

Sexy describes the essence of a person. It does help to be groomed well, smell nice (what's her favorite aftershave?) and behavior..... even more for men than women.

I think one of the best ways to glean information from your partner is to watch TV together and observe their remarks and reactions to what they say. And ask questions. It shouldn't too dangerous if she says a celebrity is hot (unless she works in that industry).


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Ask her directly. There is no way we can answer for her.


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## Wolf1974 (Feb 19, 2014)

Any questions?


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## ReidWright (May 15, 2014)

according to all the covers of the romance books, just a pair of jeans and six pack abs is all you need!

yeah...ever walk into one of those upscale 'lover's boutiques' (not a xxx sleezy shop, but nice lingerie etc)? it's thousands of nice things for the woman to wear, for the guys maybe a handful of 'wacky' silk boxers (big hearts, kisses, etc), and the novelty underwear with the front being an elephant's trunk. not sexy. 

Then maybe some 'g-string' 'marble bag' type underwear for guys...maybe sexy for a male model type, but ridiculous on everyone else


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## DoF (Mar 27, 2014)

Ask your girlfriend exactly what she would like you to wear.

And do it.

Do NOT worry about your own issues with self image etc. Remember, your looks are NOT FOR YOU, they are for your significant other!!!

Ignore yourself hehe


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## murphy5 (May 1, 2014)

get some tight fitting "boxer briefs" in hot colors. The thin sexy materials. throw away any tighty whities you might have. For that mater, thow away every pair of undershorts more than a year old.

Get a copy of GQ and get some of the outfits they have there.

go to the gym, and grow a 6 pack.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Eh?

No it doesn't work this way, you don't go on a forum to ask people what to wear to make YOU feel sexy. *This is a personal thing.* Go to a shop, try on different clothes and get the item that boosts your confidence/*makes YOU feel good* wearing it.

And don't be afraid to look at yourself in the mirror and go "I'm hot sh-t!" :rofl: (Just don't say it outloud...)

You need to find your own groove/style. For me I get away with a simple tank top or t-shirt + jeans when I'm out casually. I always dress one size down so that I can show off my biceps/pecs and... manbewbies (kidding lol), or for smart casual I normally have a few silk shirts or my favourite which is white with gold linings but depends on my mood.


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## ariel_angel77 (May 23, 2014)

Huh? Gotta give a head scratch on this one. :scratchhead:

Dressing up isn't really for men..and I don't expect my H to do it so I can't relate. Just ask her what she means. You sound really confused about it and I would be too.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Sorry but this scene kinda pops to my head when it comes to this thread:










https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k0F5XSQ2pgI


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

ariel_angel77 said:


> Huh? Gotta give a head scratch on this one. :scratchhead:
> 
> Dressing up isn't really for men..and I don't expect my H to do it so I can't relate. Just ask her what she means. You sound really confused about it and I would be too.


Sure dressing up is for men too.

Maybe the OP runs around in t-shirt and jeans all the time. She'd like him to wear some more upscale things.


Or maybe she means that she'd like to see him in some sexy man thong type thing.

He needs to ask her. She can take him shopping or show him pictures on the internet.


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## over20 (Nov 15, 2013)

liamfry said:


> So, I'm gunna post this here because I think men would better understand what I'm trying to say and how to fix it.
> 
> My girlfriend feels that she wears sexy things for me and that I don't reciprocate. I can understand what she's saying, and she's right, but I just don't know how to dress "sexily". I have some self-image issues, which doesn't help the issue.
> 
> ...




I think ties are sexy...even when worn with jeans and a nice pressed collared shirt and loafers....see ties are exclusive to men like heels are to women...very manly


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

I've always wondered why women like ties, is it because of this?










If so, I shall protest!


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## over20 (Nov 15, 2013)

RandomDude said:


> I've always wondered why women like ties, is it because of this?
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Yes...no leashes on men for me.......I was hoping the tie was being used for other purposes....if you get my drift...


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Argh, then tis even worse than I had thought!

*Launches campaign to ban ties for sexualising men!*


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## heartsbeating (May 2, 2011)

RandomDude said:


> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k0F5XSQ2pgI



Haha... oh my goodness! This and Bronies? ...the Clubhouse is full of surprises!


I've got to include this clip: I need something that's cool but also sexy - YouTube


_'I score chicks in this shirt all the time'_


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

RandomDude said:


> Eh?


:rofl:


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## bkaydezz (Jul 9, 2012)

NO skinny jeans. haha
PLEASE! 

Unless, she thinks they are sexy. Then my opinion is no longer valid.


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## bkaydezz (Jul 9, 2012)

over20 said:


> I think ties are sexy...even when worn with jeans and a nice pressed collared shirt and loafers....see ties are exclusive to men like heels are to women...very manly


I love ties too!

Very attractrive. 

A fantasy I could pull from wearing a tie


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## over20 (Nov 15, 2013)

bkaydezz said:


> I love ties too!
> 
> Very attractrive.
> 
> A fantasy I could pull from wearing a tie


OOOHHHH yes, ties have more than function.


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## Juicer (May 2, 2012)

This is what works for me. 

SO seems to think, that after I come home from the gym, when I am hot, sweaty, and tired, that I am super sexy. I don't understand why, but she does. 

Also, when I go to work wearing my suit, all clean and pressed, no, not sexy at all. 
But after a 10 hour day, with my shirt unbuttoned, my tie uneven, my hair messed up, and when I am tired, she again, finds me super attractive. Don't get why.


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## over20 (Nov 15, 2013)

Juicer said:


> This is what works for me.
> 
> SO seems to think, that after I come home from the gym, when I am hot, sweaty, and tired, that I am super sexy. I don't understand why, but she does.
> 
> ...


:iagree: I LOVE ties, but I find my husband the absolute sexiest when he is working on our cars! His hands are greasy. I think it's raw desire for him on my end.....a total "my man can fix anything" feeling on my end...so maybe I should have him wear a tie while working on the car? :rofl:


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## See_Listen_Love (Jun 28, 2012)

liamfry said:


> So, I'm gunna post this here because I think men would better understand what I'm trying to say and how to fix it.
> 
> My girlfriend feels that she wears sexy things for me and that I don't reciprocate. I can understand what she's saying, and she's right, but I just don't know how to dress "sexily". I have some self-image issues, which doesn't help the issue.
> 
> ...


This is an easy one. Really.

1. Start free weights weight training, can be done at home, or at the gym.










2. Read Bodybuilding.com - Huge Online Supplement Store & Fitness Community! for info and motivation. Safety first, concentrate on good execution, not on weight itself.

3. Buy the Men's Health for food, styling tips, and as a constant reminder on your coffeetable.

Take the decision and your problem is solved. I am dead serious!


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## marko (Jul 22, 2013)

confidence is really a good start. if she is your long time partner she will not care about a little jiggly here or there. she might mean for you to dress up a little more sexy for the bedroom, if that's the case there is very little choice for me, totally unfair for us, because there is lots I would like to wear but nothing available, especially in a XXL. 

I used to do the highland games (Scottish events) and I still have my "sport kilt" from that, it is a lighter and simpler form of kilt so I can actually wear it around the house on occasion. when I am around the yard or house I typically wear it traditionally with nothing underneath. The wife really likes this btw. 

I wear coveralls at work all day and it has been hot out, so I have been wearing athletic shorts only under them, the kind that are the silky material, and that feels sexy to me, then when I arrive home and the wife finds out I have been without underwear all day, she appreciates that as well. so you can feel sexy in baggy coveralls after all. 

have your wife give you some hints about what she wants you to wear. at the least it would give us more information to help you out.


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## Miss Taken (Aug 18, 2012)

Can't speak for your wife but to me, sexy is a man in a well-fitted suit and tie. Or even good fitting, dark-wash denim jeans, a nice buttoned up shirt, good smelling cologne or aftershave and nice dressier shoes or boots. This guy came into the elevator one day, dressed as above and had the best cologne. If I was single... I would have tried for trouble! He was yummy.

I do not like thongs or banana hammocks on men. I think they look funny, like LOL funny in them. Sorry. I do like well-fitted boxers or boxer briefs. If boxer-briefs, they must fit snugly... don't want to see bagginess in the back of briefs that should be snug in the back as it looks like a loaded baby diaper.

Even a well-fitting t-shirt. Not a muscle shirt but something that fits well to me can be hot. My guy wears shirts that fit him well. They're not super tight but they aren't baggy and long. His jeans are also loose but fit well where it matters. 

Still, everything I like is subjective. Might not work on your wife so ask her!


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## roostr (Oct 20, 2012)

ok, here is the trick..... just kidding.....Don't go by me because I'm a jeans/boots/workboots type, especially like my cowboy boots with jeans v-neck t-shirts, long sleeve fitted shirts, good cologne, decent tan going in the summer, couple tatoos, nothing too crazy, and scrubby face a few times a month. 
But I hate to dress up in suits. But for bed just my boxers, plain and simple, it works or it dont but there is no way I;m wearing one of those things with the snout lol.


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## HappyGilmore (Jul 20, 2014)

I agree with the posters who are saying that you should ask her what she thinks is sexy. For some women, it's that clean, debonair look: think James Bond. For others, it may be that scruffy, casual look: think James Dean. 

Frequently, a woman will find a change-up sexy. When my husband wears a suit and tie, which is very rarely, I want to jump his bones. When he wears a pair of jeans and his nice well fitted white button up shirt, which is somewhat more common than a suit and tie, I want to get it on with him. His everyday Patagonia shirts and pants (more outdoorsy, camping type of clothing) are not as sexy. They are not particularly "unsexy," but because they are the everyday attire, they don't elicit the same reaction as the less common ensembles. I always want sex with him, because I'm a nymphomaniac  , but his everyday clothing doesn't cause that completely out-of-control madness. Of course, there have been times when we have been out hunting together, and I've looked at him and thought he was was so hot in his hunting gear--and planned a "sneak attack" when we got back to base camp.

As for "male lingerie" such as thongs, um...nope. Not appealing at all. Of course, if she likes it on you, go for it, but I think the general consensus among us women is a man should wear nice underwear in the bedroom, or nothing at all (I prefer the latter).

Again, I recommend asking her. Maybe she can show you pictures from magazines, online. I'm sure she would be willing to tell you what she finds sexy on a man.


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