# How unattractive are video games



## Jamieboy

Not wanting to jack another thread, so created this one, a member aserted that a man playing video games makes him unattractive.

So ladies, what's your take? I disagree, but I play video games for fun sometimes. I don't watch TV though.

Im married, have a successful career and spend quality time with my kids, but im willing to be told by women in the know, my hobby makes me unattractive in general


----------



## Santi31

Every people different.. nice for u n ur family


----------



## oldshirt

I'm a guy so take this with a grain of salt but it is probably more about the bigger picture and where video games fit into it. 

If you are running a mult-million dollar business, work out and are jacked, take care of business in the home and family and are a generally ambitious and industrious person and engage with your partner and meet her needs, then the fact that you play a video game now and then probably does not in and of itself make you unattractive. 

But if your life revolves around it and you don't do anything else that does make you attractive and you live in your mom's basement and you are a part time stock boy at Walmart because your mom makes you pay your own internet bill, then yeah, chicks are probably not going to be dropping their panties for you.


----------



## Santi31

oldshirt said:


> I'm a guy so take this with a grain of salt but it is probably more about the bigger picture and where video games fit into it.
> 
> If you are running a mult-million dollar business, work out and are jacked, take care of business in the home and family and are a generally ambitious and industrious person and engage with your partner and meet her needs, then the fact that you play a video game now and then probably does not in and of itself make you unattractive.
> 
> But if your life revolves around it and you don't do anything else that does make you attractive and you live in your mom's basement and you are a part time stock boy at Walmart because your mom makes you pay your own internet bill, then yeah, chicks are probably not going to be dropping their panties for you.


I said that different people n different condition make a different situation, thats complex.


----------



## thunderchad

More and more dating profiles are saying "no gamers/video games."

I think the reason why most women find it unattractive is games are for kids. It's not something a successful man would be doing. For a lot of men, they're an addition too.

If you are man chasing your life goals the general rule is don't but time into anything that doesn't man money or further your life goals in some way. 

If you have to play for 15 mins a day, ok, whatever. But playing for an hour or hours is just a waste of time.

Women do find it attractive when men can fo things and have real life skills.

-can you fix a car?
-can you make repairs on a house?
-can you chop down a tree?
-can you make things out of wood?
-can you lift weights?
-can you sit down and focus enough to read a book?


----------



## Santi31

thunderchad said:


> More and more dating profiles are saying "no gamers/video games."
> 
> I think the reason why most women find it unattractive is games are for kids. It's not something a successful man would be doing. For a lot of men, they're an addition too.
> 
> If you are man chasing your life goals the general rule is don't but time into anything that doesn't man money or further your life goals in some way.
> 
> If you have to play for 15 mins a day, ok, whatever. But playing for an hour or hours is just a waste of time.
> 
> Women do find it attractive when men can fo things and have real life skills.
> 
> -can you fix a car?
> -can you make repairs on a house?
> -can you chop down a tree?
> -can you make things out of wood?
> -can you lift weights?
> -can you sit down and focus enough to read a book?


Yeah i agree.. he said play games just for a moment.. but from minute became a hour became a day.. lol


----------



## thunderchad

oldshirt said:


> If you are running a mult-million dollar business, work out and are jacked, take care of business in the home and family and are a generally ambitious and industrious person and engage with your partner and meet her needs, then the fact that you play a video game now and then probably does not in and of itself make you unattractive.


True but...

Even Elon Musk got dumped and his ex-girlfriend ripped him in her song "Player of Games." Not sure it has literally meaning but it's still interesting. 

I think the point you are making above also says a man like that wouldn't have much time to play video games and even if he did it would likely be sparingly.


----------



## thunderchad

For fun I asked my wife for you. (She's in her early 20s)

She said gamers are not attractive. 

I said why.

She said games are dumb and a waste of time and there's so many more productive things you could be doing like building a shelf or spending time with your gf/wife.


----------



## ccpowerslave

thunderchad said:


> -can you fix a car?
> -can you make repairs on a house?
> -can you chop down a tree?
> -can you make things out of wood?
> -can you lift weights?
> -can you sit down and focus enough to read a book?


No.
Some.
Yes, with hand tools.
Not to a high standard.
Yes, and when people look at the weights they go “uh oh”.
Sometimes.

However I can also make global leaderboards in some PC games and my online chess rating hovers around 1600.

Playing all day is obnoxious, playing occasionally when it doesn’t take away from time together is no big deal. FWIW my wife is a much bigger gamer than I am these days.


----------



## Jamieboy

thunderchad said:


> More and more dating profiles are saying "no gamers/video games."
> 
> I think the reason why most women find it unattractive is games are for kids. It's not something a successful man would be doing. For a lot of men, they're an addition too.
> 
> If you are man chasing your life goals the general rule is don't but time into anything that doesn't man money or further your life goals in some way.
> 
> If you have to play for 15 mins a day, ok, whatever. But playing for an hour or hours is just a waste of time.
> 
> Women do find it attractive when men can fo things and have real life skills.
> 
> -can you fix a car?
> -can you make repairs on a house?
> -can you chop down a tree?
> -can you make things out of wood?
> -can you lift weights?
> -can you sit down and focus enough to read a book?


I can check everything off your list, your reasoning is faulty based on no evidence other than your own personal experience. 

Old shirt is right, I think you seem to have something against video games, for me watching TV is the biggest waste of time, but different strokes for different folks.


----------



## Diana7

If it's limited and controlled then maybe it's ok. Having said that I am glad that Mr D doesn't play video games.


----------



## Jamieboy

thunderchad said:


> For fun I asked my wife for you. (She's in her early 20s)
> 
> She said gamers are not attractive.
> 
> I said why.
> 
> She said games are dumb and a waste of time and there's so many more productive things you could be doing like building a shelf or spending time with your gf/wife.


Ah I see, you are just reflecting your girlfriends views, shame you can't be independent enough to decide for yourself how you spend your time


----------



## thunderchad

Jamieboy said:


> I can check everything off your list, your reasoning is faulty based on no evidence other than your own personal experience.
> 
> Old shirt is right, I think you seem to have something against video games, for me watching TV is the biggest waste of time, but different strokes for different folks.


I go off what multiple women have told me and what I have also seen in dating profiles. 

I don't have anything against gaming per se, I used to game when I was young. 

I agree that things like TV, YouTube, and porn are huge wastes of time too.

I will stand by my point. 

Wow, I find my husband so attractive while he's playing video games...said no woman ever. 😉


----------



## oldshirt

let me put it this way, no woman is going to kick Jason Mamoa out of bed if he gets online and plays a video game now and then. 

In fact some chicks would probably soak their panties if they saw him getting real animated and really getting into it and kicking everyone's azz at it................. for awhile. 

Right now Jason Mamoa can play video games and chicks will still be lined up down the street ready to drop their drawers when their turn comes around. 

......but it's because he's Jason Mamoa. 

HOWEVER, if he becomes an actual, obsessive gamer and moves back in with his mom so he can play 16 hours a day and he gets all fat and slovenly and let's his career bottom out and he doesn't do anything else useful in his life, then the chicks will lose sexual interest in him. 

As he probably still has many millions in the bank, there will be gold diggers that would still move in with him and live off his assets. But if he is in the basement playing games all day, they will eventually be banging other dudes. 

Video games to women are probably like social media and cats are to men. If a chick is hot and puts forth effort to be a functional adult and sucks his #$%^ to his satisfaction, most guys aren't going to protest too much if a chick takes pictures of her food and posts on social media now and then and has a cat or two that she plays with and talks about for a few minutes every day. 

Does he like it and find it an attractive trait? No, not really but if she keeps herself looking good, is a functional adult and meets his sexual needs, he accepts it and tolerates it. 

BUT, if she starts spending pretty much all of her walking moments on Facebook and does nothing but posts pictures of the cats all day and she lets herself go and gets all fat and frumpy and hasn't touched him since Tom Brady was winning superbowls and expects him to pay for everything, he's gonna have a problem with it.


----------



## Jamieboy

thunderchad said:


> I go off what multiple women have told me and what I have also seen in dating profiles.
> 
> I don't have anything against gaming per se, I used to game when I was young.
> 
> I agree that things like TV, YouTube, and porn are huge wastes of time too.
> 
> I will stand by my point.
> 
> Wow, I find my husband so attractive while he's playing video games...said no woman ever. 😉


Possibly with the exception of the girlfriends of millionaire Pro gamers.

I don't know what you do for a living, but basically you're trying to say that anything that doesn't create something is a waste of time, and your wrong, humans need to relax and recharge, however you choose to do that is fine.

You seem too bothered about others agreeing with your life choices that you can't see beyond your own prejudices. 

My wife can't get enough of me, but my video game playing has no bearing on it one way or another.


----------



## Jamieboy

oldshirt said:


> let me put it this way, no woman is going to kick Jason Mamoa out of bed if he gets online and plays a video game now and then.
> 
> In fact some chicks would probably soak their panties if they saw him getting real animated and really getting into it and kicking everyone's azz at it................. for awhile.
> 
> Right now Jason Mamoa can play video games and chicks will still be lined up down the street ready to drop their drawers when their turn comes around.
> 
> ......but it's because he's Jason Mamoa.
> 
> HOWEVER, if he becomes an actual, obsessive gamer and moves back in with his mom so he can play 16 hours a day and he gets all fat and slovenly and let's his career bottom out and he doesn't do anything else useful in his life, then the chicks will lose sexual interest in him.
> 
> As he probably still has many millions in the bank, there will be gold diggers that would still move in with him and live off his assets. But if he is in the basement playing games all day, they will eventually be banging other dudes.
> 
> Video games to women are probably like social media and cats are to men. If a chick is hot and puts forth effort to be a functional adult and sucks his #$%^ to his satisfaction, most guys aren't going to protest too much if a chick takes pictures of her food and posts on social media now and then and has a cat or two that she plays with and talks about for a few minutes every day.
> 
> Does he like it and find it an attractive trait? No, not really but if she keeps herself looking good, is a functional adult and meets his sexual needs, he accepts it and tolerates it.
> 
> BUT, if she starts spending pretty much all of her walking moments on Facebook and does nothing but posts pictures of the cats all day and she lets herself go and gets all fat and frumpy and hasn't touched him since Tom Brady was winning superbowls and expects him to pay for everything, he's gonna have a problem with it.


You speak much sense my friend, also for the record how many guys actually put gamer on their dating profile, I know I wouldn't. As you say, not a selling point 

I think if no gamers, is a thing on dating profiles, it should translated as no men children please


----------



## thunderchad

Jamieboy said:


> I think if no gamers, is a thing on dating profiles, it should translated as no men children please


I think a limited amount of gaming us fine but there's a huge rash of guys gaming for hours a day and no life.


----------



## Mr. Nail

.


----------



## thunderchad

Mr. Nail said:


> I've seen women on this board frankly state that spending too much time trying to get the approval of you wife / GF is Dumb.


I have to agree with them on this.


----------



## Anastasia6

Notice most of the replies are men. 🤷‍♀️


----------



## thunderchad

Anastasia6 said:


> Notice most of the replies are men. 🤷‍♀️


Tell us what you think.


----------



## Anastasia6

thunderchad said:


> Tell us what you think.


No thanks. I've have enough threads I'm currently getting bashed on. I don't feel strongly enough about this one to start another fight here.


----------



## oldshirt

Anastasia6 said:


> No thanks. I've have enough threads I'm currently getting bashed on. I don't feel strongly enough about this one to start another fight here.


So you get digs that men are the ones addressing the question when it was women's insight that was asked for, but then you say you won't offer your thoughts and opinions on the subject matter because someone ruffled your feathers on another thread. 

Ok, I guess we'll have to go back to men talking about it then.


----------



## Zedd

My wife doesn't care. We had one conversation about it, it went something like:

W: I don't get why you play games so much.
Me: I don't get why you watch people buy houses on TV
W: touche

Now, not all gaming is the same, obviously. On nights where my son is with my ex-wife, I game with him almost every night for 40 minutes before he goes to bed. Heck, my wife games with him some nights. As with anything, there's a difference between enjoyment/relaxation/whatever and having an unhealthy relationship with something.


----------



## Anastasia6

oldshirt said:


> So you get digs that men are the ones addressing the question when it was women's insight that was asked for, but then you say you won't offer your thoughts and opinions on the subject matter because someone ruffled your feathers on another thread.
> 
> Ok, I guess we'll have to go back to men talking about it then.


So pointing out a truth is a dig?


----------



## BigDaddyNY

Keep in mind that gaming has gone to new levels over the past several years. I bet those pro gamers making 7 figures are pretty attractive, lol.

I've gone through many phases of being a gamer. There have been plenty of times where I've pulled all nighters. One time my wife walked in while I was playing a PC game and I asked her what she was doing up so late? She said, I'm leaving for work, it was 6am, lol. That is not sexy in any way shape or form.

I found that on a limited basis there are no issues, but it is so easy to get absorbed into a game that you lose track of time. When you start putting in gaming hours that are comparable to the quality time you have with your spouse you are in for trouble. It is almost like having an affair. You are cheating your spouse out of your time. I still do things on my own, like play in a softball and basketball league and I'll even break out a game from time to time, but you have to seriously control and monitor the time you are dedicating to gaming, just like any hobby.

So, it isn't that gaming itself is unattractive, but the idea that it is more important than your relationship based on time spent doing it is unattractive. This could be the case with any hobby.


----------



## oldshirt

Most of what most people do during the course of a normal day is not sexy and not really all that appealing to the opposite sex. 

My wife cleaned out the cat box today. I can't say I found that particularly arousing. 

I throw a load of work clothes in the laundry. I don't think that got her hot and bothered at all. I'm going to take a load of trash out to the dumpster in a little bit, we'll see if that gets her lady bits soaked.


----------



## oldshirt

Anastasia6 said:


> So pointing out a truth is a dig?


It it when it was intended to be a dig.


----------



## Anastasia6

oldshirt said:


> It it when it was intended to be a dig.


I intended it to be an observation. I guess you can take that as a dig.

ETA and with that I'm out. I don't have the energy for this crap.


----------



## Zedd

oldshirt said:


> I throw a load of work clothes in the laundry. I don't think that got her hot and bothered at all.


Um... maybe my wife is weird, but if I do all the kids' laundry on the days I work from home, I'm probably getting seggsy time that night.


----------



## Mr. Nail

.


----------



## Talker67

so, whatever is posted here is a mere SNAPSHOT IN REAL TIME.

come back in 2 or 3 years, where EVERYONE is using the metaverse, going shopping as their online avatar.....gaming will be not too much different from normal life. Be prepared to do almost EVERYTHING in the future online in a virtual world.

I guess the proper answer to the OPs question: Just how sexy is your AVATAR?


----------



## thunderchad

Talker67 said:


> come back in 2 or 3 years, where EVERYONE is using the metaverse, going shopping as their online avatar.....gaming will be not too much different from normal life. Be prepared to do almost EVERYTHING in the future online in a virtual world.


While all the soy boys are jerking off in the meteverse to ai bots the real men will have women lined up out the door. LOL


----------



## Anastasia6

Mr. Nail said:


> And that is the honest opinion that was sought.


Well I just asked for a ban so I'll expand


Mr. Nail said:


> And that is the honest opinion that was sought.


Well I just asked for a ban so I'll expand since I won't get dragged into a long draw out battle.

I think it isn't the act of playing the game. I think BigDaddy is on the nose for me.
It is how much time and energy you put into the game. If you are putting more time, energy and passion into the game then your relationship then that is unattractive and makes the woman feel like ****.

My husband plays and online game occasionally. But it is occasional and usually when I have something else to do. He doesn't ignore me because his clan is warring. He won't join the clans or groups because they demand too much time and commitment.

So I don't care if a guy plays a game. I do care if I don't feel loved. One of my love languages is time.

Lots of things we do all day aren't sexy.... However many aren't choices. I mean you can't choose not to go to work or go to the bathroom. So it's the choices you do have and how you make them that shows your spouse if they are valued.


----------



## Cletus

thunderchad said:


> If you are man chasing your life goals the general rule is don't but time into anything that doesn't man money or further your life goals in some way.


What an incredibly horrible (IMHO) way to run your life.


----------



## Numb26

Have never played any video games so it's a non issue


----------



## DownByTheRiver

Gaming is like any other non-productive activity that you waste a lot of time on. It's fine as long as it's not affecting the rest of your life and family and work. Once it crosses that line as it very often does, it becomes a destructive addiction. 

On top of all that, it certainly is not very sexy for a grown person to be sitting around like a 6-year-old playing games all day. If a person is able, there are 101 ways to use your time to make yourself a better person besides playing video games which doesn't make anyone better at anything. 

I say this in all sincerity as I get ready to play slotomania. But I'd rather be river rafting or attending music gigs or working at making more money.


----------



## ccpowerslave

DownByTheRiver said:


> …video games which doesn't make anyone better at anything.


Well hopefully you at least get better at video games, otherwise yeah sad coz ur bad. I mean I play only competitive multiplayer games, so it’s like a non-physical sport.


----------



## uwe.blab

thunderchad said:


> I think a limited amount of gaming us fine but there's a huge rash of guys gaming for hours a day and no life.


There is a huge rash of guys gaming for hours a day and it is hard not to conclude they are immature/have not grown up.


----------



## thunderchad

Remember that the life of this world is but a sport and a pastime.


----------



## oldshirt

I don’t waste any of my time and energy on video games.

I do enough of that discussing and debating other people’s relationship and sex problems with strangers on the internet that spend their time and energy discussing and debating other people’s relationship and sex problems.


----------



## theloveofmylife

thunderchad said:


> She said games are dumb and a waste of time and there's so many more productive things you could be doing like building a shelf or spending time with your gf/wife.


Does she hate board games too? Cards?

I'm the wife here, and I say everyone needs some downtime.



DownByTheRiver said:


> there are 101 ways to use your time to make yourself a better person besides playing video games which doesn't make anyone better at anything.


Not true. 

Helps with:

Better hand - eye coordination
motor reflexes
Visual-spatial skills
Situational awareness
Problem solving
Social skills (in some settings)
Team work 
And for some, making a crap ton of money

There's more, but don't take my word for it. Plenty of research out there.


----------



## happyhusband0005

thunderchad said:


> I go off what multiple women have told me and what I have also seen in dating profiles.
> 
> I don't have anything against gaming per se, I used to game when I was young.
> 
> I agree that things like TV, YouTube, and porn are huge wastes of time too.
> 
> I will stand by my point.
> 
> Wow, I find my husband so attractive while he's playing video games...said no woman ever. 😉


Ninja's wife might say that.


----------



## maquiscat

thunderchad said:


> I think the reason why most women find it unattractive is games are for kids.


No they are not anymore. Many video games are made and targeted for adults, as well as ones for kids. Same for board games nowadays.



> It's not something a successful man would be doing.


And yet somehow there are those who are making buku money by playing video games, either in competitions, or by streaming their plays. 



> For a lot of men, they're an addition too.


Can't be denied, and for many women as well.



> If you are man chasing your life goals the general rule is don't but time into anything that doesn't man money or further your life goals in some way.


As noted, many people, men and women, are making good money playing video games



> If you have to play for 15 mins a day, ok, whatever. But playing for an hour or hours is just a waste of time.


What is a waste of time is very subjective. I look at all the "men" who spend hours working on cars or their lawn or even hunting, and that seems like a waste of time for me.



> Women do find it attractive when men can fo things and have real life skills.
> 
> -can you fix a car?
> -can you make repairs on a house?
> -can you chop down a tree?
> -can you make things out of wood?
> -can you lift weights?
> -can you sit down and focus enough to read a book?


I know plenty of men who cannot do any of these things and don't play video games, and still make good money. Cars today, outside of change a tire, aren't designed for the easy maintenance of yesteryear. You practically need a degree to fix them. Just because you can't make something out of wood, doesn't mean you don't have any life skills. You could be an excellent plumber and not be able to work wood. You don't need to lift weights to work out and be healthy. Basically, it seems like you are stereotyping.


----------



## maquiscat

thunderchad said:


> For fun I asked my wife for you. (She's in her early 20s)
> 
> She said gamers are not attractive.
> 
> I said why.
> 
> *She said games are dumb and a waste of time and there's so many more productive things you could be doing like building a shelf or spending time with your gf/wife.*


My wives and I had a laugh over this while playing video games together.


----------



## thunderchad

maquiscat said:


> I know plenty of men who cannot do any of these things and don't play video games, and still make good money. Cars today, outside of change a tire, aren't designed for the easy maintenance of yesteryear. You practically need a degree to fix them. Just because you can't make something out of wood, doesn't mean you don't have any life skills. You could be an excellent plumber and not be able to work wood. You don't need to lift weights to work out and be healthy. Basically, it seems like you are stereotyping.


You don't need a degree to fix a car. 😂

I do think men have lost a lot of life skills.

Most people I know can't fix anything. They call a plumber to fix a leaky sink.


----------



## Zedd

never mind


----------



## Mr. Nail

.


----------



## Cletus

thunderchad said:


> -can you fix a car?
> -can you make repairs on a house?
> -can you chop down a tree?
> -can you make things out of wood?
> -can you lift weights?
> -can you sit down and focus enough to read a book?


I have changed the engines in two cars, replaced transmissions, struts, and rebuilt a head. I do all but the most complex auto repair myself
I built with my own two hands (with the help of others) an 1800 square foot two story addition to my house
I will NOT chop down a tree, since my trees are big enough to kill me and lumberjacking is one of the world's most dangerous professions. 
I built our bathroom vanity and both of the queen bed frames with headboards in our home. I learned by doing it poorly at first, better as time went on. 
I can lift weights. Not so much as before, but in my prime I could bench 150% of my body weight.
I have a college degree in engineering and a very full technical bookshelf plus a fully packed kindle. 

And I play video games occasionally. I trust that would make me ineligible for a date?


----------



## minimalME

I don't really see how it's any more unattractive than watching pornography or posting on a forum all day long. 😂


----------



## thunderchad

Cletus said:


> And I play video games occasionally. I trust that would make me ineligible for a date?


Occasionally is fine, every day...or hours long...bad.


----------



## DownButNotOut

thunderchad said:


> For fun I asked my wife for you. (She's in her early 20s)
> 
> She said gamers are not attractive.
> 
> I said why.
> 
> She said games are dumb and a waste of time and there's so many more productive things you could be doing like building a shelf or *spending time with your gf/wife.*


And there it is. She doesn't like to compete for time with something that doesn't benefit her.


----------



## happyhusband0005

thunderchad said:


> -can you fix a car?
> -can you make repairs on a house?
> -can you chop down a tree?
> -can you make things out of wood?
> -can you lift weights?
> -can you sit down and focus enough to read a book?


Some stuff yes, but I just take it to the dealership.
I can design, permit and build any building from raw land to final occupancy.

Yes but my cousin has a tree service.

I just built a whole wall of builtins because the carpenter we hired wasn't showing up. Then my painter f'ed them all up so I have to build more cabinet doors.

Use to be into body building at peak I was 5'-10" 208lbs 4% bod fat and all time max bench was 435 which I injured myself lifting. Now I still left but do not go heavy, goal is underwear model body I'm 5-10 174lbs around 8% body fat maybe 10 haven't checked in a while. 

Only if it's a really good book. The TB12 Method is a good book I've read that probably 6 times. 

I have a gaming PC that I mostly use for occasional CAD work and some 3d modeling. I use to play a game called Apex Legends from time to time, but mostly I would play Fortnite with my son which was fun because he was one of the top players in the world and made a lot of money playing competitively until last spring. I just run around with him and he kills everyone and we win. He gets his license in June but has a Mercedes in the garage that he bought before he even started learning to drive. Gaming didn't hurt him with the ladies he had groupies when he was playing for real. Now in high school he's more into Lacrosse but his gaming past does get him attention because people know he knows some of the most famous streamers in the world.


----------



## Angie?or…

DownButNotOut said:


> And there it is. She doesn't like to compete for time with something that doesn't benefit her.


Surely spending time with each other benefits the _relationship, _meaning both partners, not just the wife? If you hate spending time with her, why in the world would you be married to her?


----------



## DownButNotOut

Angie?or… said:


> Surely spending time with each other benefits the _relationship, _meaning both partners, not just the wife? If you hate spending time with her, why in the world would you be married to her?


Who said anything about hating spending time with anyone?

This is about a man's hobbies.

Is fishing unattractive?
Is Chess unattractive?
Paintball?
Hunting?
Snowmobiling?
Motocross?

My position is that a man's hobbies (including video games) becomes unattractive when she competes for time.

I bet woodworking, or classic car restoring would as well if he spends all of his time in the garage.


----------



## Angie?or…

Ok, I misunderstood your point. Sorry.


----------



## Enigma32

I'm a guy but I will share my experiences. Gaming is easily my #1 hobby and I have run into issues in a few of my relationships because of it. Ladies who spend all day scrolling on their phones, binge watching TV shows, reading romance novels, or just plain texting people all day will often see gaming as a childish, silly way for a man to spend his time. I've noticed this mentality is even more prevalent in ladies my age (40's) and up. So, if you are a guy and you play games at all or especially often, be prepared for some ladies to find it unattractive, as I have run into that problem several times myself. 

My personal view on the matter is that it is just another part of the compatibility puzzle. I've met women who think video games are for children and I've dated women who started getting into games even more than I was at the time. If you have plenty to offer as a man and some woman says she won't date you because of your harmless hobbies, just consider that a bullet you dodged. Games make me happy and I'm not about to give that up for some woman.


----------



## ThatDarnGuy!

Cletus said:


> I have changed the engines in two cars, replaced transmissions, struts, and rebuilt a head. I do all but the most complex auto repair myself
> I built with my own two hands (with the help of others) an 1800 square foot two story addition to my house
> I will NOT chop down a tree, since my trees are big enough to kill me and lumberjacking is one of the world's most dangerous professions.
> I built our bathroom vanity and both of the queen bed frames with headboards in our home. I learned by doing it poorly at first, better as time went on.
> I can lift weights. Not so much as before, but in my prime I could bench 150% of my body weight.
> I have a college degree in engineering and a very full technical bookshelf plus a fully packed kindle.
> 
> And I play video games occasionally. I trust that would make me ineligible for a date?


You are not an accomplished man unless you have successfully replaced the altenator of a 2005 Ford Escape. And have successfully changed the spark plugs on a Ford 5.4 Triton engine without breaking one and doing it in half a day without saying one four letter word 🤣🤣🤣🤣

I remember I removed/rebuilt/reinstalled the engine in a 1999 Toyota Corolla. That was the easiest engine I have ever dealt with. I had music going, cooler of beer, and laughing with the wife.


----------



## oldshirt

thunderchad said:


> Women do find it attractive when men can fo things and have real life skills.
> 
> -can you fix a car?
> -can you make repairs on a house?
> -can you chop down a tree?
> -can you make things out of wood?
> -can you lift weights?
> -can you sit down and focus enough to read a book?


I get your point, but as in all things it is about degrees and context. 

Chicks may dig that a guy can make things out of wood. 

But, if he lives in his mom’s basement, works part time stocking shelves at Walmart and spends 16 hours a day engrossed in the wood shop, he’s probably not going to be too popular with the ladies. 

Being hyperfocused on any one thing at the exclusion of other life activities is not desirable regardless of what that activity is.


----------



## ThatDarnGuy!

My view about this is if you take care of business. Then who cares about what anyone thinks about an hour of gaming during the day.


----------



## Benbutton

thunderchad said:


> More and more dating profiles are saying "no gamers/video games."
> 
> I think the reason why most women find it unattractive is games are for kids. It's not something a successful man would be doing. For a lot of men, they're an addition too.
> 
> If you are man chasing your life goals the general rule is don't but time into anything that doesn't man money or further your life goals in some way.
> 
> If you have to play for 15 mins a day, ok, whatever. But playing for an hour or hours is just a waste of time.
> 
> Women do find it attractive when men can fo things and have real life skills.
> 
> -can you fix a car?
> -can you make repairs on a house?
> -can you chop down a tree?
> -can you make things out of wood?
> -can you lift weights?
> -can you sit down and focus enough to read a book?


Yes to all of the above, though I don't touch trees due to a horrible traumatic event involving one. I am a jock and I play one video game during the winter months. My wife thinks it's cute seeing the nerdy side of a jock. I'm also a star wars fan. 

Personally I don't see the difference between that and watching sports (which I also do). If a woman finds me unattractive because of that then she's probably a pita I wouldn't want to deal with anyway.


----------



## Cletus

ThatDarnGuy! said:


> You are not an accomplished man unless you have successfully replaced the altenator of a 2005 Ford Escape.


There is a special hell for the inventor of the transverse mounted engine. The water pump on my Windstar back in the day required you to disconnect the engine mounts and partially jack up the engine.

Without 4 letter words? Then it's a good thing the swear words I invent during auto repair are hyphenated.


----------



## Numb26

Not to pour gasoline on a fire but who has time to sit in front of a TV for a couple of hours?


----------



## ThatDarnGuy!

Cletus said:


> There is a special hell for the inventor of the transverse mounted engine. The water pump on my Windstar back in the day required you to disconnect the engine mounts and partially jack up the engine.
> 
> Without 4 letter words? Then it's a good thing the swear words I invent during auto repair are hyphenated.


🤣.... wait until Ford F150 owners have to change the belt for the belt driven oil pump! I see ratchets flying across the yard lol


----------



## DownByTheRiver

thunderchad said:


> While all the soy boys are jerking off in the meteverse to ai bots the real men will have women lined up out the door. LOL


Don't bet on it.


----------



## Benbutton

thunderchad said:


> Wow, I find my husband so attractive while he's playing video games...said no woman ever. 😉


Yeah but you would be wrong, and my wife is a doll.


----------



## DownByTheRiver

minimalME said:


> I don't really see how it's any more unattractive than watching pornography or posting on a forum all day long. 😂


You might learn something on a forum.


----------



## Numb26

The average American male playing video games, circa 2022 (colorized)


----------



## Cletus

Scott Adams was a prophet


----------



## Benbutton

thunderchad said:


> I think a limited amount of gaming us fine but there's a huge rash of guys gaming for hours a day and no life.


Here's the thing, to what some women may see as an unattractive male hobby, there are those women who have equally unattractive female hobbies (facebook anyone?).


----------



## Cletus

DownByTheRiver said:


> You might learn something on a forum.


Yes, I might learn that some people think they have the one and only proper definition of how I should spend my spare time.


----------



## Benbutton

Mr. Nail said:


> This is some of the best advice here. The question asked was what do women think? it's an opinion question. it's not about facts, or levels of quality It's about what people (women) feel about a subject. A lot of women think Games are dumb. A lot of women think sports are Dumb. A lot of women think hunting and fishing are dumb.
> It's true. I went to high school with a pack of Neanderthals who thought reading was Dumb. Which leads us to what @Santi31 said, There are a lot of different people and situations. It won't be hard to find people who think cutting down trees is Dumb. I've seen women on this board frankly state that spending too much time trying to get the approval of your wife / GF is Dumb. And just for the fun of the conversation I bought and built a "shelf" for my wife for Christmas. Was it Dumb? I don't know, I don't have an effing clue what that woman thinks is attractive.
> 
> So I play games if I want to. I read message boards If I want to. I shoot guns if I want to. I do art when I want to. Because making choices based on someone else's Opinion is Dumb. Which I really think is the conclusion that @Jamieboy is coming to.


If I could like this 1000 times I would.


----------



## ThatDarnGuy!

Benbutton said:


> Here's the thing, to what some women may see as an unattractive male hobby, there are those women who have equally unattractive female hobbies (facebook anyone?).


I can't stand Facebook. I don't understand how people become so addicted to it. From the moment they get up to the moment they go to bed. Its constantly checking status, making comments on someones cheese sandwich they had for lunch blah blah blah 

I created an account years ago and was bored with it within an hour.


----------



## LATERILUS79

This argument makes no sense. I don’t think any leisure time activity is considered “attractive”. Video games is like any other leisure time activity. It’s meant to shut off your brain to give it a break. It’s no different than going to a movie. Shut off the brain. Go with the “suspension of disbelief”. That’s it.

I typically play video games with my son (sometimes my daughter when she wants to play) an hour every other night. Sometimes every third night. Sometimes not at all. I do it when the sun is down and it is too dark to play something outside. I do it more in the winter time when my garage (my workshop) is too damn cold to do anything.

I fix my car.
I fix my house 

I lift and/or exercise 5 days a week

I don’t like to read. I don’t find it enjoyable, and yet, I watch YouTube videos to further my knowledge of the physical world. I like to challenge my knowledge of engineering principles and expand upon them 

I fix my kids toys. In fact, I modify their Nerf guns so that they actually hurt when you get shot. Why? Because my brain has a hard time turning off.

I continually advance in my career.

I spend as much time with my wife as she would want - we are both introverts and very much like our alone time.

nothing…. And I mean nothing comes between my wife and I wanting to spend time together. She likes to read. I typically will play video games when she does that. If she came to me and wanted to spend time together, I’d drop video games in a heart beat.

I play video games as it is one of the few things where I can shut off my brain and relax.

seeing thunderchad boast about how things are only a certain way and can only be a certain way as he sees fit is hilarious.

let me quick go ask my wife if she thinks my video games are attractive. That would be my wife who was formerly in her 20’s (not quite sure why the age of a wife matters as we all age over time)

She tells me she is indifferent to it. Doesn’t see it as attractive or unattractive. However, she says she’s always been impressed with the way that I tinker things. She likes what my custom PC looks like.

playing video games isn’t done to attract a woman. I attracted my wife through a variety of other methods. Playing video games doesn’t make me less attractive to my wife either. She fully understands That all humans need a break. Need to relax. She fully accepts that I play video games to do this.


----------



## Affaircare

I'm a lady and I'm a gamer, BUT I am more of a casual gamer than a dedicated guild-member type of gamer. I've played MMORPGs for probably 15 years, specializing in healing characters. Now I only play LOTRO because I decided to just pick the one game. I personally enjoy the LOTRO story and the scenery, I was an original beta-tester, and I'm a compulsive completionist.  But my hubby who passed, and my Beloved Buddhist both play games and I don't mind. 

That being said, what I see happening is they take care of business (business includes work, home and me), and when they have a little down time--they play. Shoot, more than half the time I'll play then too! But there's never a feeling of neglecting me to get to the game...or priorizing the game over me. To me, that's the important part: OUR time is priority to both of us. And in down time, we both enjoy the strategy and creativeness of the games. My current hubby does not play LOTRO with me--he plays World of Tanks, and I've played both games, but I'm just not a tank lover. He is one of the best in the game. So I'm proud of him and his game accomplishments, but I'm more proud that he has it in the proper place, which is enjoyable entertainment.


----------



## minimalME

ThatDarnGuy! said:


> I can't stand Facebook. I don't understand how people become so addicted to it. From the moment they get up to the moment they go to bed. Its constantly checking status, making comments on someones cheese sandwich they had for lunch blah blah blah
> 
> I created an account years ago and was bored with it within an hour.


Well, like with instagram, it depends what you use it for.

My adult autism groups are on facebook. Travel, minimalism, science, art. They're just another form of social meetups.

I enjoy them. 🙂


----------



## Enigma32

Numb26 said:


> The average American male playing video games, circa 2022 (colorized)
> View attachment 83267


I ask that you please don't use my image without my permission, bro.


----------



## Numb26

Enigma32 said:


> I ask that you please don't use my image without my permission, bro.


Sorry man, I'll ask next time 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣


----------



## farsidejunky

It's funny when I see people calling gaming childish.

I'm earning my first pension and working on my second one.

I train MMA and BJJ 5 to 6 days a week, and teach kickboxing one night a week.

I spend quality time with my wife and son on various activities. 

I changed the oil on my vehicle, tractor, and mower. I replaced the head gasket on my tractor. I built a chicken coop with external nesting boxes and a fully enclosed run. I've plumbed a dog bathing tub that required running it through the crawl space.

I also have a swivel mount 24-in monitor mounted on the end table next to my recliner so I can sit my happy ass down and play video games, which I do several hours a week.

My on and off obsession for the last 3 years has been modding Skyrim. I sometimes play other games, but always find my way back to that one.

Does it make me immature? Maybe. I can think of several other personality traits that contribute far more to being able to call me immature. But I sure as **** have a lot of things going for me.

Somehow, some way, I will try and find a way to live with myself.

Sent from my Pixel 6 using Tapatalk


----------



## Cletus

farsidejunky said:


> Somehow, some way, I will try and find a way to live with myself.


Well, of course you will, but will any woman waste her time on a man with so few prospects?


----------



## farsidejunky

Cletus said:


> Well, of course you will, but will any woman waste her time on a man with so few prospects?


You jest, but one never really knows until they find themselves there.

Sent from my Pixel 6 using Tapatalk


----------



## thunderchad

minimalME said:


> I don't really see how it's any more unattractive than watching pornography or posting on a forum all day long. 😂


Porn is equally stupid and also dangerous.


----------



## Jamieboy

Loving all these replies, from the thick, one dimensional ones to the considered and balanced ones, 

I think the best answers, the opinion I held myself before starting the thread, is your hobbies are irrelevant, as long as they are no detriment to your relationship.

If I were to miss out on a few dates because they found out I like to play games occasionally, I think im the winner that scenario.


----------



## ccpowerslave

Affaircare said:


> …he plays World of Tanks, and I've played both games, but I'm just not a tank lover. He is one of the best in the game…


WoT is played competitively as an eSport and is a high skill cap title.


----------



## happyhusband0005

I asked my son on the way home from Lacrosse if he thought girls thought guy who game were lame. His response was "I had 20+ year old women coming into my stream and asking me to marry them so probably not". He also doesn't believe anyone who plays on a console can call themselves a gamer. 

Where you see gaming for younger guys being a big issue in the romance department is a lot of kids want to be pro level players at games and spend 8-10 hours a day playing like pro players do. Problem is there is a level of talent involved in the highest levels so most never come close and then after a few years they have no social life at all and have nothing in the way of accomplishments to show for it and they can become very depressed and end up that guy in his moms basement. That is pretty unattractive.


----------



## frusdil

oldshirt said:


> I'm a guy so take this with a grain of salt but it is probably more about the bigger picture and where video games fit into it.
> 
> If you are running a mult-million dollar business, work out and are jacked, take care of business in the home and family and are a generally ambitious and industrious person and engage with your partner and meet her needs, then the fact that you play a video game now and then probably does not in and of itself make you unattractive.
> 
> But if your life revolves around it and you don't do anything else that does make you attractive and you live in your mom's basement and you are a part time stock boy at Walmart because your mom makes you pay your own internet bill, then yeah, chicks are probably not going to be dropping their panties for you.


Exactly, 100% this.


----------



## RandomDude

If you don't look like a stereotypical geek you can game all day and still have your partner pull your pants off to get your attention so meh.

For me, games are one of the few things that can stimulate both the intellect and imagination at the same time. I need that kind of stimulation to switch off.

Speaking of which, Warhammer 3 is out! Downloading it now 

Me soon:









😝

I also noticed the younger generation don't have so many of these hiccups, they even game with you. Older generation generally just don't really have the, erm... 'aptitude'? I dunno, they just can't, even when they try. Hence I used to have to game alone in my man cave when married.


----------



## DownByTheRiver

What I don't like is when people know you're not interested in whatever it is, such as video games or a certain TV show, but they are so obsessed with it that they can't shut up about it and want to tell you about every little thing even though you have zero interest in it and only find it annoying.


----------



## RandomDude

Numb26 said:


> The average American male playing video games, circa 2022 (colorized)
> View attachment 83267





Enigma32 said:


> I ask that you please don't use my image without my permission, bro.





Numb26 said:


> Sorry man, I'll ask next time 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣


LOL!


----------



## happyhusband0005

Jamieboy said:


> Loving all these replies, from the thick, one dimensional ones to the considered and balanced ones,
> 
> I think the best answers, the opinion I held myself before starting the thread, is your hobbies are irrelevant, as long as they are no detriment to your relationship.
> 
> If I were to miss out on a few dates because they found out I like to play games occasionally, I think im the winner that scenario.


There are also girl gamers. If a person has a passion for anything I would think it ideal to find someone else who shares that passion.


----------



## EleGirl

ThatDarnGuy! said:


> My view about this is if you take care of business. Then who cares about what anyone thinks about an hour of gaming during the day.


I agree. To me the issue is the amount of time spent gaming. If a person is living a well-rounded life and gaming is one part of that, all's good. If, however, they spend the vast majority of their non-work awake hours gaming and ignoring everything else, there's an issue.


----------



## sokillme

It's like anything else. In moderation.

It's also not just a guy thing.


----------



## maquiscat

oldshirt said:


> ......but it's because he's Jason Mamoa.
> 
> HOWEVER, if he becomes an actual, obsessive gamer and moves back in with his mom so he can play 16 hours a day and he gets all fat and slovenly and let's his career bottom out and he doesn't do anything else useful in his life, then the chicks will lose sexual interest in him.


Thanks. Now I have a mental image of Fat Aquaman playing Fortnite with Fat Thor, both of who are featured skins.


----------



## maquiscat

thunderchad said:


> You don't need a degree to fix a car. 😂
> 
> I do think men have lost a lot of life skills.
> 
> Most people I know can't fix anything. They call a plumber to fix a leaky sink.


Have you seen the insides of modern cars these days, especially with all their computer driven crap? Trust me there are reasons why auto mechanics have to have extensive training.


----------



## Affaircare

ccpowerslave said:


> WoT is played competitively as an eSport and is a high skill cap title.


Oh it’s very clear even as a tier 1 tank that WoT is an eSport. Lots of the upper tier guys come down-tier to earn points, and the best players all know each other even if “by reputations only.”

The thing I enjoyed but wasn’t too good at is that there’s not really a rotation, but rather you have to study the other tanks in your tier, know their weaknesses and exploit them, know your weaknesses and protect them, AND use different strategies every game. That and the matchmaker gets crazy later at night.


----------



## RandomDude

happyhusband0005 said:


> There are also girl gamers. If a person has a passion for anything I would think it ideal to find someone else who shares that passion.


Games are mainstream these days among the youth, both guys and girls. Though the girls mostly play casual games on their phones or stuff like Animal Crossing. And if they do game further it's all the mainstream titles; Fortnite, LoL, yadda yadda. Not my thing lol.

For folks with niches like me (strategy mainly) - still a sausage fest. As fun as it was with my partner gaming with me with coop games, she could never get into strategy with its gazillion complex mechanics 

... then again, remembering how competitive she was, she probably just didn't want to lose! When we had matches in fighting games for example certain moves are "banned" between us because she didn't know how to counter them - so if she can't counter them then its considered cheating  🤦‍♂️

Also don't like multiplayer (either than coop with partner), too many obligations too with all the guilds and what not, like come on - I like to be able to turn on, play, switch off or pause at any time. Most mainstream games are multiplayer, like League of Legends, and don't allow you to do that. So if you don't have the hours straight to commit to a game session you may even get banned. Like WTF?! I get it sure but meh...


----------



## Erudite

Gaming is repetitive and boring. A level 1 character vs a level 1 boss is the same as a level 30 character against a level 30 boss. And if you have to jack up or mod a low level character to play at a higher level then thats cheating. All the higher levels have that lower levels don't is flashier artwork. Blah.


----------



## TexasMom1216

It doesn’t matter what your hobbies are. What is unattractive is putting your hobby absolutely first in your life and not caring about anything else. Whether it’s video games or woodworking or guns or golf or hunting, a hobby is a hobby and when it starts interfering with your life it’s gone too far.


----------



## heartsbeating

Jamieboy said:


> Not wanting to jack another thread, so created this one, a member aserted that a man playing video games makes him unattractive.
> 
> So ladies, what's your take? I disagree, but I play video games for fun sometimes. I don't watch TV though.
> 
> Im married, have a successful career and spend quality time with my kids, but im willing to be told by women in the know, my hobby makes me unattractive in general


Who are the women in the know? ....Does that relate to another thread, or people/friends around you?

You no doubt play video games and seem to have a good partnership. I think that's your answer ...for you. To play along though, Batman plays video games. Maybe once a fortnight/month. We have games at the ready to play together, too. Which are different to the ones he plays solo. He enjoys it. End of. That's my take.


----------



## heartsbeating

farsidejunky said:


> It's funny when I see people calling gaming childish.
> 
> I'm earning my first pension and working on my second one.
> 
> I train MMA and BJJ 5 to 6 days a week, and teach kickboxing one night a week.
> 
> I spend quality time with my wife and son on various activities.
> 
> I changed the oil on my vehicle, tractor, and mower. I replaced the head gasket on my tractor. I built a chicken coop with external nesting boxes and a fully enclosed run. I've plumbed a dog bathing tub that required running it through the crawl space.
> 
> I also have a swivel mount 24-in monitor mounted on the end table next to my recliner so I can sit my happy ass down and play video games, which I do several hours a week.
> 
> My on and off obsession for the last 3 years has been modding Skyrim. I sometimes play other games, but always find my way back to that one.
> 
> Does it make me immature? Maybe. I can think of several other personality traits that contribute far more to being able to call me immature. But I sure as **** have a lot of things going for me.
> 
> Somehow, some way, I will try and find a way to live with myself.
> 
> Sent from my Pixel 6 using Tapatalk


I don't view playing video games as immature; particularly when other life stuff is sorted. Not that it matters what I think, anyway. Batman is currently looking into options of tractor stuff... although not farm grade, so we're working out what makes sense of owning for amount of use required. Anyway, like many here, he also has plenty of other stuff going on in his life that are units of time (About a Boy reference). He is an avid reader/audio-book listener, has self-taught crafted woodwork furniture/stuff for us and enjoys the learning and creativity. Mentioned before he's a volunteer fire-fighter; and so I relay this simply that these are aspects of how he spends his time - including with me and sometimes playing video games. I can't say that I find his enjoyment of playing video games as attractive or unattractive. I'll add though, no doubt my watching of crappy reality shows could well be questioned!

He's currently playing Ghost of Tsushima.


----------



## farsidejunky

heartsbeating said:


> I don't view playing video games as immature; particularly when other life stuff is sorted. Not that it matters what I think, anyway. Batman is currently looking into options of tractor stuff... although not farm grade, so we're working out what makes sense of owning for amount of use required. Anyway, like many here, he also has plenty of other stuff going on in his life that are units of time (About a Boy reference). He is an avid reader/audio-book listener, has self-taught crafted woodwork furniture/stuff for us and enjoys the learning and creativity. Mentioned before he's a volunteer fire-fighter; and so I relay this simply that these are aspects of how he spends his time - including with me and sometimes playing video games. I can't say that I find his enjoyment of playing video games as attractive or unattractive. I'll add though, no doubt my watching of crappy reality shows could well be questioned!
> 
> He's currently playing Ghost of Tsushima.


Tell him to look into the grey market Yanmar tractors. Parts are easy to come by (at least in the states) and they are extremely capable for their size. I have a Yanmar YM2000B, which is a 22 hp compact tractor. It moves 5x5 round bales for me, which is a feat given the size. 

Sent from my Pixel 6 using Tapatalk


----------



## heartsbeating

farsidejunky said:


> Tell him to look into the grey market Yanmar tractors. Parts are easy to come by (at least in the states) and they are extremely capable for their size. I have a Yanmar YM2000B, which is a 22 hp compact tractor. It moves 5x5 round bales for me, which is a feat given the size.
> 
> Sent from my Pixel 6 using Tapatalk


That's the Japanese brand? He was talking about this with me. Thanks for the tip!


----------



## farsidejunky

heartsbeating said:


> That's the Japanese brand? He was talking about this with me. Thanks for the tip!


It is. They are dependable (unless you overheat one like yours truly, hence the head gasket) and easy to work on.

Sent from my Pixel 6 using Tapatalk


----------



## heartsbeating

thunderchad said:


> If you are man chasing your life goals the general rule is don't but time into anything that doesn't man money or further your life goals in some way.


How does forum-posting come into that line of thinking?

Yes, I'm being facetious.


----------



## heartsbeating

Following DBTR...deleted post as side-tracking from the topic.


----------



## DownByTheRiver

I deleted my own post when I realized it had absolutely nothing to do with the topic at hand. I think I deserve a lollipop for that.


----------



## A18S37K14H18

Female here in my mid-50's.

Personally I hate video games, games on cellphones etc.

But, perspective is needed. This post was about men playing video games.

What about some women who scroll facebook for hours and hours or talk and text to friends for hours and hours each day or watch hours of TV or do several of these things at once?

What if they do that 3 to 4 hours each night and their man only plays one hour of video games each night?

Now, switch the 1 hour of video games their man plays to him working out 1 hour each night. 

People escape in a variety of ways.

Some women (and men too) have many hobbies other than games that take them away from their partner and/or families for hours and hours.

I don't get hung up on whether they're working out for an hour or two or playing a video game for an hour or two or golfing or hunting or reading a novel.

I get hung up on whether they are avoiding me, the children, not pulling their weight around the house etc.

If they're doing all of those things, of course they should have some time to themselves doing something they like, be it running, playing softball, golfing, hunting, fishing or playing video games.


----------



## LeGenDary_Man

I am a PC gamer but I prioritized my marital responsibilities. I used to have a good PC but I sold it and bought a simple laptop for my work - this was when I was looking forward to have a child with my wife (our first). 

My life is in much better shape now with a home, a car, and other assets. I could also afford an HP Omen and got it. I can play PC games now but I still have work to do - to complete my PhD thesis.

My wife does not mind PC gaming as long as I am taking my marital responsibilities seriously. She is not into PC gaming herself but is willing to play some PC games with my encouragement. I taught her how to play Resident Evil (HD Remaster) for example. But WE are both preoccupied with our PhD studies in the present. WE will have more time for this kind of fun after a few months.


----------



## Anela

I play video games. It's only a problem if you avoid other parts of your life for too long, because of them.


----------



## Mr.Married

I asked my wife what she thought of guys playing video games and she had to run to the sink because she was puking in her mouth. In the middle of spewing she manages to get out “Almost as bad as flying drones”


----------



## Works

Mr.Married said:


> I asked my wife what she thought of guys playing video games and she had to run to the sink because she was puking in her mouth. In the middle of spewing she manages to get out “Almost as bad as flying drones”


My boyfriend just bought one of those VR things you put on the face, I told him, so long as it is not interfering with our relationship, have at it. If I am around, try to minimize usage to 1-2 hours so we can still do things together.

The reason I am not fond of them is because I had someone who was gone months at a time for his job, when he came back he never did anything with me, just play video games. I sat alone and bored... This was many, many years ago, now, I want to make sure I make clear what I want, while he also does what he wants (video games).


----------



## DownByTheRiver

A18S37K14H18 said:


> Female here in my mid-50's.
> 
> Personally I hate video games, games on cellphones etc.
> 
> But, perspective is needed. This post was about men playing video games.
> 
> What about some women who scroll facebook for hours and hours or talk and text to friends for hours and hours each day or watch hours of TV or do several of these things at once?
> 
> What if they do that 3 to 4 hours each night and their man only plays one hour of video games each night?
> 
> Now, switch the 1 hour of video games their man plays to him working out 1 hour each night.
> 
> People escape in a variety of ways.
> 
> Some women (and men too) have many hobbies other than games that take them away from their partner and/or families for hours and hours.
> 
> I don't get hung up on whether they're working out for an hour or two or playing a video game for an hour or two or golfing or hunting or reading a novel.
> 
> I get hung up on whether they are avoiding me, the children, not pulling their weight around the house etc.
> 
> If they're doing all of those things, of course they should have some time to themselves doing something they like, be it running, playing softball, golfing, hunting, fishing or playing video games.


I agree except that scrolling social media doesn't cost much money at all and playing video games can cost you hundreds depending on how far you're willing to go, but many of them force you to pay in game in order to get far. So if you have someone who's playing even a couple of hours they're probably spending some significant money.


----------



## RandomDude

DownByTheRiver said:


> I agree except that scrolling social media then what cost much money at all and playing video games can cost you hundreds of depending on how you're willing to go, but many of them force you to pay in game in order to get far. So if you have someone who's playing even a couple of hours they're probably spending some significant money.


And this is why there is significant controversy right now in the gaming industry in regards to pay-to-win mechanics and also loot-boxes (gambling) marketed at kids. It's quite disgusting.


----------



## jonty30

DownByTheRiver said:


> I agree except that scrolling social media doesn't cost much money at all and playing video games can cost you hundreds depending on how far you're willing to go, but many of them force you to pay in game in order to get far. So if you have someone who's playing even a couple of hours they're probably spending some significant money.


You can also have a conversation, while scrolling, that you cannot have while playing video games.


----------



## jonty30

DownByTheRiver said:


> I agree except that scrolling social media doesn't cost much money at all and playing video games can cost you hundreds depending on how far you're willing to go, but many of them force you to pay in game in order to get far. So if you have someone who's playing even a couple of hours they're probably spending some significant money.


I buy my games complete and some games, like Diablo II and Civilization III, I am playing them still after 20 years.
I would never buy a video game where there is any form of pay to play. 
I either want the entire game in complete, or I don't want it.
I am, however, willing to pay for expansion packs if i like the game. However, again, those expansion packs have to be complete in themselves.


----------



## DownByTheRiver

I think a lot of parents and spouses who don't play mistakenly think video games aren't costing them except for an initial purchase. That used to be the case a decade or more ago. I honestly don't see how kids with no job and just an allowance afford to play at all. If we want to be helpful, we might list the different place it can be billed to so people can look on their credit card and bank statements. The one I play, the money goes to Google Play, so that's android, but there are more providers on android.


----------



## Anela

DownByTheRiver said:


> I think a lot of parents and spouses who don't play mistakenly think video games aren't costing them except for an initial purchase. That used to be the case a decade or more ago. I honestly don't see how kids with no job and just an allowance afford to play at all. If we want to be helpful, we might list the different place it can be billed to so people can look on their credit card and bank statements. The one I play, the money goes to Google Play, so that's android, but there are more providers on android.


You can do challenges, win things. I've only paid for things twice, when I decided to. I don't spend money on them, usually. All except one, were free, or given to me by my sister, when she got me back into gaming, after my mother died.


----------



## TexasMom1216

DownByTheRiver said:


> I think a lot of parents and spouses who don't play mistakenly think video games aren't costing them except for an initial purchase. That used to be the case a decade or more ago. I honestly don't see how kids with no job and just an allowance afford to play at all. If we want to be helpful, we might list the different place it can be billed to so people can look on their credit card and bank statements. The one I play, the money goes to Google Play, so that's android, but there are more providers on android.


Oh we're WELL aware. We credit his allowance and rewards money directly to his Xbox account.


----------



## Anela

Works said:


> My boyfriend just bought one of those VR things you put on the face, I told him, so long as it is not interfering with our relationship, have at it. If I am around, try to minimize usage to 1-2 hours so we can still do things together.
> 
> The reason I am not fond of them is because I had someone who was gone months at a time for his job, when he came back he never did anything with me, just play video games. I sat alone and bored... This was many, many years ago, now, I want to make sure I make clear what I want, while he also does what he wants (video games).


One of my cousins got divorced, partially because he stopped spending time with his wife, and lost himself in video games - but he also changes up his girlfriends/wives, which is annoying. 

One female friend of mine, is a gamer. Her husband encourages her to do anything that she enjoys. He bought her a gaming computer, and expensive monitor. They adore each other, and she doesn't lose herself in it, over spending time with him.

The gaming industry is also currently donating a lot of money to Ukraine humanitarian efforts. Fortnite is donating everything they make, for two weeks. In two days alone, $50 million was raised.


----------



## RandomDude

TexasMom1216 said:


> Oh we're WELL aware. We credit his allowance and rewards money directly to his Xbox account.


I sure hope you review the games he gets.

This is a screenshot of a modern day "basketball" game:










Guess the age rating? *3+*


----------



## TexasMom1216

RandomDude said:


> I sure hope you review the games he gets.
> 
> This is a screenshot of a modern day "basketball" game:
> 
> Guess the age rating? *3+*


Is the objection that it’s gambling or am I missing something?

He plays mostly horror games. Dead by Daylight is his favorite. He’s learned all the characters and the backstories for all of them. He’s fascinated by horror legends. He’s even started writing his own. ☺


----------



## As'laDain

Gaming is family time in my house. We have three PlayStations and play destiny2 together in a fire team. 

I'm away from my family enough that online gaming just becomes a way to actually be able to interact with them while I'm gone.


----------



## RandomDude

TexasMom1216 said:


> Is the objection that it’s gambling or am I missing something?
> 
> He plays mostly horror games. Dead by Daylight is his favorite. He’s learned all the characters and the backstories for all of them. He’s fascinated by horror legends. He’s even started writing his own. ☺


That was an ingame screenshot. It's a slot machine that you can put real money in, in a basketball game (yup, thats how messed up it is), for kids age 3+
So yeah, it's gambling for kids.

And yup, dead by daylight has both pay-to-win mechanics and loot-boxes (also gambling), you pay real money for the chance of getting ingame items (not guaranteed purchases). As it's his favorite game now though, too late in regards to avoiding the game 

They don't tell parents these things about video games these days. They empty your wallet through your kids.


----------



## snowbum

Whatever happened to moderation? My husband place PC games for an hour or two a week, max. I play Best Fiends once or twice a week while chilling out. We spend our other time with family, exercising, weekly church, etc.

Video games aren't a big deal unless you have an addiction, like anythig else. I'd rather hang with him and read a book/watch him play for a brief time than have him at a bar or sexting. (which he doesn't do) any hobby could become all consuming.


----------



## TexasMom1216

RandomDude said:


> That was an ingame screenshot. It's a slot machine that you can put real money in, in a basketball game (yup, thats how messed up it is), for kids age 3+
> So yeah, it's gambling for kids.
> 
> And yup, dead by daylight has both pay-to-win mechanics and loot-boxes (also gambling), you pay real money for the chance of getting ingame items (not guaranteed purchases). As it's his favorite game now though, too late in regards to avoiding the game
> 
> They don't tell parents these things about video games these days. They empty your wallet through your kids.


We're not that worried about the gambling, but that's a very personal choice and people are different. He always asks before he spends real money. Whenever he gets allowance, chore money or reward money we just credit it to his games. We know all about the pay to win in Dead by Daylight, he complains about it too. He has ethical issues with the game not allowing you to win with pure skill, but programmers have to eat too. He's told us that his friends don't always ask before they spend and end up getting grounded for overspending when the credit card bills come in. We had it set up with approval notifications that came to my husband's phone; as a test, we disabled them and watched the CC statements and he always came and asked first so we turned it off permanently. He doesn't always do his homework every day but he DOES ask before he spends money or eats candy. (He's 13, not sure why he still asks permission to eat candy, but ok)


----------



## RandomDude

TexasMom1216 said:


> We're not that worried about the gambling, but that's a very personal choice and people are different. He always asks before he spends real money. Whenever he gets allowance, chore money or reward money we just credit it to his games. We know all about the pay to win in Dead by Daylight, he complains about it too. He has ethical issues with the game not allowing you to win with pure skill, but programmers have to eat too.


Most of the gambling money don't go in the programmers pockets but in the pockets of those who push for these unethical practices lol



> He's told us that his friends don't always ask before they spend and end up getting grounded for overspending when the credit card bills come in.


LOL yup!



> We had it set up with approval notifications that came to my husband's phone; as a test, we disabled them and watched the CC statements and he always came and asked first so we turned it off permanently. He doesn't always do his homework every day but he DOES ask before he spends money or eats candy. (He's 13, not sure why he still asks permission to eat candy, but ok)


Ah he should be fine then, he doesn't sound like the type to get into the trap like his mates and it looks like he has earned your trust


----------



## Girl_power

Jamieboy said:


> Not wanting to jack another thread, so created this one, a member aserted that a man playing video games makes him unattractive.
> 
> So ladies, what's your take? I disagree, but I play video games for fun sometimes. I don't watch TV though.
> 
> Im married, have a successful career and spend quality time with my kids, but im willing to be told by women in the know, my hobby makes me unattractive in general


I find men who play videos games unattractive and that’s coming from a women who plays video games. 


Playing video games is unattractive. Period. Not everything we do is attractive. I’m sure not all my hobbies are attractive to the opposite sex.


----------



## Peering_Within

I find it great when my husband plays games with our six year old daughter and nine year old son. They make a big deal about it with a projector, snacks/treats, play age-appropriate games. He is reliving the classics with them. It is very sweet and it makes their day/night. That is very attractive. Playing games all day while it is beautiful outside and you are unwashed and downing soda in the dark is unattractive. But all should get to be unattractive every once in awhile in our relationships. Just don't do it too much. You might not be able to shake it off in her eyes.


----------



## Peering_Within

thunderchad said:


> I have to agree with them on this.


I am fighting with husband on this. He is concerned with what I think. Sure I will be mad and unpleasant if he doesn't do what I want. But frankly, he does have an ability to charm me. Smile, be pleasant, kiss my neck and hold me, I won't be so mad. I might be different, but I will forget about it if he is sweet, sexy and attentive. That is mostly what I want from him. Not a robot who does my bidding.


----------



## BigDaddyNY

Peering_Within said:


> I find it great when my husband plays games with our six year old daughter and nine year old son. They make a big deal about it with a projector, snacks/treats, play age-appropriate games. He is reliving the classics with them. It is very sweet and it makes their day/night. That is very attractive. Playing games all day while it is beautiful outside and you are unwashed and downing soda in the dark is unattractive. But all should get to be unattractive every once in awhile in our relationships. Just don't do it too much. You might not be able to shake it off in her eyes.


We did a lot of this when my kids were young. We also played a lot of the interactive Wii games. They actually got you up off the sofa. 



Peering_Within said:


> I am fighting with husband on this. He is concerned with what I think. Sure I will be mad and unpleasant if he doesn't do what I want. But frankly, he does have an ability to charm me. Smile, be pleasant, kiss my neck and hold me, I won't be so mad. I might be different, but I will forget about it if he is sweet, sexy and attentive. That is mostly what I want from him. Not a robot who does my bidding.


He may just want to hear from you that you are happy and he is concerned enough to not want to do things that annoy you. Don't be afraid to tell him what you do and don't like. That isn't the same as commanding his every move.


----------

