# Fast answer needed!!!



## Lilybelly (Mar 24, 2016)

When you get more goods on your WS, do you tell them you hired a PI? 
Never divulge your sources, right?


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## Bremik (Feb 6, 2009)

If you reveal the how's it makes it easier to hide


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

Lilybelly said:


> When you get more goods on your WS, do you tell them you hired a PI?
> Never divulge your sources, right?


Never.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## 225985 (Dec 29, 2015)

Lily, You knew the answer of course. What are you thinking? Are you trying to get some leverage or voluntary confession?


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## Lilybelly (Mar 24, 2016)

Just found out some more and caught him in another lie. I had a var in while I was gone overnight last night. He got home at 6:30 this morning, exactly 1:50 hours before I did.


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## Lilybelly (Mar 24, 2016)

I am livid and about ready to explode on him.


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## stephscarlett (Sep 2, 2015)

I did. So now he knows it's something I would do. He actually mentioned that he doesn't know if I have a PI follow him or have a mole at his work spying on him. And it's my fault that he thinks this because I did do it once. I don't know if it keeps him honest. 
I figure it's the consequences of not telling the truth even when I begged for it. You're not gonna tell me what's going on in my life? Fine, ill find out myself. 
If the goods are dealbreaker things I wouldn't tell though...


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## donny64 (Apr 21, 2012)

I would not. And I know how hard it is...I'm going through it now myself. I had to keep it in for over a month while I devised an alternate method of "discovery". And it was brutal to keep it in. But my source is safe.

Is this a deal breaker lie? (Haven't read your backstory yet, but assuming you caught him in an affair, and he's still cheating and has not called it off is your suspicion). 

Especially if you are still consider reconciling, don't reveal the source. Could be as easy as "it's none of your business how I know....I know". If you can stick to that and not cave under pressure as you start to feel better about reconciliation.


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## Bananapeel (May 4, 2015)

The never divulge is really based on what your planned action is. If you have proof of the affair and are going to divorce then it really doesn't matter. If you want to be able to use the VAR again either because you don't have enough proof or because you plan to try to reconcile, then you don't want to divulge because then they'll just become better at hiding the affair. 

Do you have enough proof to confront and take action?


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## honcho (Oct 5, 2013)

The "how" you found out is your business, not his right now. Many times the one in trouble wants to know how it was discovered so they can deflect the argument to a new subject ie your spying on me? Type of argument instead of dealing with the I got caught at something. Once they know a source of info they can start to spin the story to raise doubt etc.


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## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

Lilybelly said:


> I am livid and about ready to explode on him.


Lillyb, the desire to let him know is probably overwhelmingly but do NOT do it, you are on surveillance, keep doing so, then you can hit him with the evidence and draft divorce papers, before that he will just be more careful.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*Always remember that the mantra of investigating spousal infidelity should preeminently be, "Silence is absolutely golden!"

Just as the wayward spouse prefers "stealth" in their commission of infidelity against their committed partner, so should the betrayed spouse, when fully investigating the extent of the covert betrayal that was so often unconsciably committed against them!*
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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