# Men's views - signs you love your wife



## aine

I am interested in men's views in particular. 

What are the things you do or say which (in your mind) show that you still love your wife.


----------



## GusPolinski

Random thoughts...

* She's the last thing on my mind when I shut my eyes at night and the first thing on my mind when I open them in the morning.

* Back in the summer of 2006, I had a pretty bad wreck. Basically I picked a fight w/ an 18-wheeler and lost. Rolled my SUV over a couple of times (this was AFTER doing a 180... no pun intended) and wound up in the back seat upside down... and on my neck. Ouch.

Anyway, just before I started to roll over, I thought to myself, "I'm never going to see <Mrs. Gus' name> again. I hope she'll be OK."

* I've alluded to this before, but I'll share again...



GusPolinski said:


> Over the course of the past 10 years, I've spent large swaths of time on the road and working away from home, mostly commuting between home and my employer's headquarters about 300 miles away.
> 
> Additionally, I've been on the road for the majority of the past 9 1/2 months. From early December through mid-March I spent probably 4-5 hours commuting every day. Between mid-March and late June, I was on the road from Sunday/Monday - Thursday every other week; since then it's been every week.
> 
> Sometimes, when I find myself up or waking up late at night or very early in the morning, I will grab my cell phone and listen to voice messages that my wife has left me. They're mostly about mundane day-to-day stuff, but just hearing her voice in the dark makes me feel better.


----------



## aine

i think the men are shy on TAM  , no responses. So you need to be in a life or death situation  
Thanks Gus!


----------



## GusPolinski

aine said:


> i think the men are shy on TAM  , no responses. So you need to be in a life or death situation
> Thanks Gus!


To be fair, you'd have probably gotten more responses if you'd posted this in the Men's Clubhouse forum.


----------



## SecondTime'Round

aine said:


> i think the men are shy on TAM  , no responses. * So you need to be in a life or death situation  *
> Thanks Gus!


:rofl:


----------



## gouge_away

From the beginning until the end of my marriage, I gave almost daily foot massages.

I put an extreme amount of thought into every gift, it had to be perfect. Sometime little thoughtful things that reminded us of something in the past, just to show that I always thought of her.

Every day, I told her she was beautiful, even amongst our biggest fights.

I did all this with no expectation of it being returned. Even though my marriage was a train wreck, and probably never should have happened. My affection was freely given day by day.


----------



## meson

I tell her I love her;

Make special meals she enjoys especially when she comes home from travel and really wants a home cooked meal;

Touch. An arm rub, butt pat, back scratch etc;

Message. She has dry feet so I rub them with coconut oil to help keep them soft;

Watch TV programs she likes that I don't with her and engage with it;

Support her activities;

All of these things are acts of love.


----------



## MountainRunner

Off the top of my head, I would say that when I go shopping I often come across something and tell myself "She would like that.", so I bring it home for her. In the evening, since I know how she loves having her back scratched, I will offer to give her a back scratch without her having to ask for one (I know she absolutely loves that as I can see her eyes light up when I offer it)...just a couple of things for starters.


----------



## Fozzy

I tell her the truth. Even when it's unpleasant.


----------



## GusPolinski

Fozzy said:


> I tell her the truth. Even when it's unpleasant.


Do you use the "joke sandwich" method? Tell a joke, get a couple of laughs, tell the truth, then tell another joke to sort of ease the tension?

Maybe throw in a couple of "wockas" as well...?


----------



## lilbitoluv

Fozzy said:


> I tell her the truth. Even when it's unpleasant.


Is that all?


----------



## Mr.Fisty

I would say listening and keeping open communication so we know what each others needs are, and so we also stay intimate knowing each other well.


----------



## jorgegene

There's always a big hug and kiss waiting for her when she gets home.
she loves that after a hard day. It makes everything better again.

I text her love notes during the day.


----------



## Fozzy

GusPolinski said:


> Do you use the "joke sandwich" method? Tell a joke, get a couple of laughs, tell the truth, then tell another joke to sort of ease the tension?
> 
> Maybe throw in a couple of "wockas" as well...?


I carry a rubber chicken in my pocket for such occasions.


----------



## GusPolinski

Fozzy said:


> I carry a rubber chicken in my pocket for such occasions.


Cue random choking gestures.


----------



## MountainRunner

Here's one I did for my wife just recently. I just reestablished contact with my old jeweler from back in the eighties. He has an upscale jewelry shop in a rather affluent town in the SF Bay Area (about 2 hours away). Anyway, when I first proposed to my wife, all I could afford at the time was a 1/4 carat diamond, right? OK, so we were going to be in town for one of my half marathons, so I told my friend to expect us on Friday evening. My wife and I drive to the bay area, check in, and then I surprise her by taking her in to the jeweler and introduce her to my friend. To which he trots out (prearranged) about 8 superb stones all between 1 and 1.5 carats. I then say "I love you darlin. Pick anything you want and it's yours."

My wife loves jewelry so you can imagine her reaction. I then had the original stone made into a pendant that she wears about her neck.


----------



## aine

Am jealous and convinced I married a philistine when it comes to romance


----------



## MAJDEATH

Daily "I Love You"s, which I never did before the R. We are also at a point in our lives where we communicate much better to let the other know how we are feeling, and we understand why. This is very liberating and connects us as a partnership. We try to use our example of stellar communications to help others in crisis marriages.

I don't "blow her off" when I really don't want to talk to her. I never used to be that way but after R I realized she is trying to tell me something important, and I should listen.

I say "thank you Dear" a lot. It sounds simple but it really works. Show your appreciation!

I try not to be critical, even when her ideas/plans are not well thought out. I know (thru experience) that if I don't negate her ideas immediately, that within a day or two she will self-examine and decide it was a bad idea for herself. 

I purchased an 1860's historical home for my wife, so that she can engage in her passion of restoring home furnishings, painting, and other details to make the home period correct. She says it is very "therapeutic" for her MH (ie. to be able to re-purpose a chandelier) and the happy wife, happy life motto really works.:x

My W works very hard at maintaining the home and I am glad that I can provide enough for both of us that she does not have to work outside the home. She is an accomplished author and I encourage her writing, even when I don't particularly care for the subject matter.


----------



## Hope Shimmers

MAJDEATH said:


> *I purchased an 1860's historical home for my wife*, so that she can engage in her passion of restoring home furnishings, painting, and other details to make the home period correct. She says it is very "therapeutic" for her MH (ie. to be able to re-purpose a chandelier) and the happy wife, happy life motto really works.:x


Totally, completely jealous. That is my all-time dream. She is the luckiest woman ever.



MAJDEATH said:


> My W works very hard at maintaining the home and I am glad that I can provide enough for both of us that *she does not have to work outside the home*. She is an accomplished author and I encourage her writing, even when I don't particularly care for the subject matter.


Even more jealous.

I would be ecstatic with #1 above. But both?

I have just re-written my goals for finding a man. Thanks.


----------



## MAJDEATH

The 20K rock on her finger doesn't hurt either!


----------



## knobcreek

Boner grinding into her ass as I grope her boobs every morning.


----------



## tech-novelist

I provide for her so that she has not had to work outside the house for the past 15 years.

Although I handle all our financial affairs, I keep all the information up to date with a copy on her computer so that if I died suddenly she would know where everything was and how to get at it.

I let her drive our sporty car whenever she drives any distance, because the power makes her feel safer getting on the expressway.

When she has been sick or injured, which fortunately has been infrequently, I cater to her every medical need.

I let her buy anything she wants that is within our means.

And of course I show her love physically as well. No, not just that way! You people have dirty minds. >


----------



## arbitrator

*As for me, the best sign that I love her is that I would want to be in her presence for damn near every moment of the day!*
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## aine

knobcreek said:


> Boner grinding into her ass as I grope her boobs every morning.


I wonder does your wife have the same take on that?


----------



## knobcreek

aine said:


> I wonder does your wife have the same take on that?


I said that mostly in jest, but It lets her know I desire her, find her sexually appealing, and typically ends with her feet over my shoulders so I'm guessing she likes it.

I won't apologize for my c*ck getting hard with my wife's ass pressed against my crotch, or the desire to touch her. of course there's foot rubs, flowers, texts randomly throughout the day. But to me, we're young, and young couples should be intimate and me signaling to my wife I desire her is a show of love.


----------



## heartsbeating

I know you're more after the men's views but a show of love from my husband touched me recently. The scenario: I was going to be working a rare 14hour day. He asked what I'd do about dinner. I told him I'd duck out and grab something nearby. I was content to do that. He said I deserved to have a better dinner and he'd come pick me up so we could have dinner together. And that's what he did. Picked me up, chose a restaurant near my work, and we enjoyed dinner together. An hour drive each way, just to meet me for dinner! When I thanked him, he replied 'Totally worth it..' mreow.


----------

