# Stress and no sex!!



## Sunflowergirl123 (Sep 12, 2011)

I have been in a very loving and supportive relationship with my boyfriend for the past 7.5 years. At first He was very loving and we had sex. He then got promoted at his job and took on a lot more responsibility and everything on his shoulders, therefore he stays stressed ALL THE TIME and DREADS going to work. 

I feel as if this as stramed over into our relationship and he is just too tired to do anything intimate in the evenings. I love him with all my heart and I want to put the spark back in our relationship, but I am a little on the shy side when it comes to initiating the whole sex thing and I am afraid of rejection.

Does anybody have any helpful hints for me on this or suggestions on how to overcome my rejection fear?:scratchhead:


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## Nicbrownn80 (Mar 20, 2011)

just jump into it.

Maybe expect him to say no, ask anyway, and it can only get better.


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## Enchantment (May 11, 2011)

You can always start slowly. 

Do you give him hugs, kisses, touch his shoulder/back? Do you compliment him - tell him he looks good, smells good? Do you tell him you appreciate him, care about him?

You could also start by being a little more provocative when you are around him and maybe he'll take the bait. Unbutton a few more buttons on your shirt and lean over him while he's sitting down. Wear a short skirt and bend over to pick up something. You get the idea.

Best wishes.


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

Maybe you have to chick it up with candles and Chinese chimes and Tantric sex furniture and such.


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## Open4it (Sep 1, 2011)

Key words ... loving and supportive relationship. It sounds like you've no need to be shy. 
The best way to get over your fear is of course do that which you fear.
Channel your inner SexGoddess. 
If he's already on the sofa after work, have him sit up but lean back and then get on the floor between his legs. Look him in the eyes and start brushing your hand against his crotch through his (whatever he's wearing). If he's clothed, unzip slooooooowly all the while looking him straight on with a little smirk on your lips. Seductively tell him you've missed him. Take out his p*nis, have a wee little bit of oil handy to lube up your hands and then give that man a nice, erotic hj/bj combo. I sometimes wear silk gloves too for a different sensation or use a toy on the 'boys'.
He may appreciate that you've taken charge and not put any pressure on him to perform if he's tired.

Then again, I'm not a guy so who knows if this will work.


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

Open4it said:


> Key words ... loving and supportive relationship. It sounds like you've no need to be shy.
> The best way to get over your fear is of course do that which you fear.
> Channel your inner SexGoddess.
> If he's already on the sofa after work, have him sit up but lean back and then get on the floor between his legs. Look him in the eyes and start brushing your hand against his crotch through his (whatever he's wearing). If he's clothed, unzip slooooooowly all the while looking him straight on with a little smirk on your lips. Seductively tell him you've missed him. Take out his p*nis, have a wee little bit of oil handy to lube up your hands and then give that man a nice, erotic hj/bj combo. I sometimes wear silk gloves too for a different sensation or use a toy on the 'boys'.
> ...


This works for me.

You know there are times when I am very stressed and my wife just rides the stress out of me.


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## tacoma (May 1, 2011)

You should take the chance on initiating.
open4it has the right idea.


Personally, I never understood the "I`m too stressed for sex" excuse considering sex is the worlds greatest stress relief.

There`s no way I could even think about work,kids, etc while I was inside my wife and after sex I just don`t give a damn...it can all go straight to hell.
lol

Alone time with her whether it`s sexual or not IS my stress relief.


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## Just Dave (Sep 13, 2011)

Men are never too tired for sex. If out of respect and love for your man you've kept yourself in good shape and you're not aloof when it comes to sex, then there should never be a concern of rejection from your man. Unless he is having an affair.

If you've let yourself go believing in the drivel that he should love me for who I am and not what I've become, then yes - fear of rejection is in order.

There is one other possibility. Does he respect you? Which of you did not want to get married the most? Or are you both afraid of committing to a marriage?


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