# Vindictive ex wife wants more - Need advice



## Lonelyin NC (Aug 1, 2012)

I have been legally separated from my ex wife for 16 months . We have a legal separation agreement that clearly defines what each of got from the marriage. I've already given her around $9,200 cash, taken over her car payments, kept her on my health insurance from work, payed for her moving expenses back home ( approx $1544.00) and let her take whatever personal and household belongings she wanted. In turn , she waived her rights to the house (signed a quitclaim to the property), and waived her rights to my retirement and 401k.

As far as I know, shes working and has herself a decent place to live. Signing divorce papers would be a simple process with all being said - WRONG!

I recieved an email from her a couple of weeks ago saying she wanted a divorce and wanting me to pay for half of it. I told her no and that if she wanted a divorce, she was to pay for it. I recieved a summons from the State of Ct saying i have to appear in divorce court next month. She is claiming I need to pay for court cost, her lawyer fees, distribution of equitable property and other cost that the court may deem necessary.

Apperently, what I gave her from our separation isnt enough. We never had any children at all , so how can she rate more? 

I'm digging up the signed copy of the agreement and whatever documentation I can find that shows what ive already done to support her. . I guess the other thing to do is hire a lawyer in Ct . to handle this. Is there anything else I should do? Can she get away with this?:scratchhead:


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## 06Daddio08 (Jul 26, 2012)

Talk to a lawyer yet?


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## ChknNoodleSoup (Oct 20, 2012)

Hire a lawyer


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## Lonelyin NC (Aug 1, 2012)

Im going to call a couple more lawyers from Ct. on Monday and in the meantime gather up all my paperwork for the support Ive given her so far and get the original signed copies of the separation papers. This is absolute BS 

I have a few friends who have children and who have gotten little to no support from their ex's who think my ex is being extremely greedy


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## Sincererlytrying (Oct 31, 2012)

Talk to a good attorney who specializes in divorce. My wife's attorney tried the same crap with the first offer by basically asking for me to pay for everything, and give her my entire take-home salary as support.

Apparently, some irresponsible attorneys think this is a good tactic. All it did in my case was cause me to trust my STBXW even less, because she had to approve this offer.


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## Conrad (Aug 6, 2010)

Lesson learned here is, "Don't pay them to leave you"


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## Pluto2 (Aug 17, 2011)

Geez, dude, sorry. Anybody can ask for fees, and in a divorce a court can award fees as if it were alimony. And just because you ask for it does not mean you get them. Its a simple matter to raise the separation agreement as a bar to equitable distribution, provided you both waived those rights in the agreement.
How much of an interest in the house did she waive? How much of your retirement? Are they both marital property? You said you "thought" she was working, does she have a means of support?


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## BFGuru (Jan 28, 2013)

Mine tried something similar, not exactly, but once he realized I wasn't playing his games he backed down a little. Not a lot. Still have legal aid on hand for any of his stupidity.


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## C3156 (Jun 13, 2012)

This is pretty standard, ask for the world in the hopes that you will accept it.

Get a lawyer and file a response. State that all properties have been divided and that each party shall be responsible for thier own legal fees (lawyer & court). Or you could ask that she pay your fees and lawyer. It is just a game to see who will get the better deal. Just because she is asking does not mean that you are responsible for it, but you have to file a response to say that basically you will not pay for it.

Some people never cease to amaze me. I feel so fortunate that my ex an I were able to complete a reasonably amicable divorce. Divorce & court fee was $165 and waste 1/2 a day for the judge to sign the final.


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## HappyKaty (Nov 20, 2012)

Does she have grounds for a divorce, or are y'all just going with irreconcilable differences?

My ex didn't want to pay for any part of the divorce, but because I had grounds, he was forced to pay for the entire debacle.


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