# Need some advice...



## nathansmom (May 10, 2009)

So this is the story in a nutshell...

My husband and I were married in 2005. 

I have since then had some major issues with depression and lying. 

We split as of Nov 1, 2008. 

In December I met a new guy...thought he was the man of my dreams...did everything for me...and then left me..

During this 5 months I was with "dream guy" I started to wonder about my marriage and missing my husband.

Back in Nov we went to one counselling session. He didn't want to talk to me, he laughed at the counselling session. When he laughed, it tore me apart. He told me that the laughing was because he was nervous.

Back in march, he asked me to go to counselling or something. To think about it. At this point I was still head over heels with my "dream guy"and said I didn't think so. I hurt so bad in November when my ex left me...so so bad. I begged himt o stay with me.

Now since I split with "dream guy" my ex and I have slightly talked about going to a counsellor. 

He has told me that it won't be romantic at all, not at the beginning..

He has told me that he wants to take it slow...which is fine to me. I guess I just don't get what slow is slow.

He took my son to his parents this weekend, and tonight he is going out with his sister.

I told him to have fun, and that I loved him and my son. This is all through a text message.

My husband is not someone that shares his feelings very well.

He told me to have a good night.

Should I take this as he isn't serious? I know I'm obviously thinking too much about it.

Help!


----------



## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

nathansmom said:


> I have since then had some major issues with depression and lying.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I believe we are missing some puzzle pieces here, but I'm going to go with two things you have written which stand out to me. I'm wondering if your depression and lying contributed to both of your relationships ending. Most relationships can't survive lying. I really think individual counseling would be a great place for you to start.

Second, if you were missing your husband while seeing the "dream guy", you still hadn't resolved the old issues with your husband. I'm sure the "dream guy" probably sensed this as well. It does sound as though your husband has still left the door open. Perhaps there could be a chance there, if you get your issues resolved.

Good luck and may God bless you!


----------



## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

nathansmom said:


> My husband is not someone that shares his feelings very well.
> 
> He told me to have a good night.
> 
> ...


If your H doesnt share his feelings, then it'll be hard to know if he's being serious about your relationship or not. I think you should start doing things that make you feel good about yourself. Since you are playing the guessing game that just tells me you are really insecure and dont want to lose something if it can even possibly work out. that's not really a good place to be. go out, have fun, find yourself again, all by yourself. you need to be confident being alone. you need some soul searching time. If he wants you, let him prove it.


----------

