# After the Lies - "Scott Free"



## Horizon (Apr 4, 2013)

Before I get to my topic - I've been surfing around here a bit, reading as much as I can...anyway, do some of you agree that a "happy relationship" is no guarantee that infidelity will not occurr? Based on what some have described, it seems that cheating can happen no matter how imune you might think your are.

Now...over the last 2 days I have been plagued by revenge thoughts against the OM. I was so overwhelmed that I have plotted how I'm going to rock his world with some in your face "publicity". I have re-named the snake "Scott Free" because he's got off scott free and I don't like it one bit. Guess it's a normal response but I haven't met this pr**k live yet and hell I want to. Yes, could be a bad move. This has all blown out because I have attempted contact but he is not responding - hoping I'll just go away. Fires me up it does!

PS: partner has expressed more remorse and is really trying to reach out to me. I'm still hot and cold - tonight couldn't stand to be near her. At least I'm working this week.


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## SomedayDig (Jul 17, 2012)

Cheaterville . com

It's an easy way and fairly effortless. My own story has been written quite a few times, but in case you haven't heard it - I put the xOM on the site last August. He WAS an attorney. In a very short few weeks the cheaterville site was the #1 in a Google search for his name. I also took advantage of the "send anonymous email" function and sent the link to his top 2 partners in the firm. It is a large firm with 10 offices in the state. He WAS the senior counsel for his office.

Now. He is a glorified salesman for a green energy company.

His page has, as of right now...1,654,240 views. Having his picture on it helps cuz now everyone can see him.

As for your first question, no. A "happy relationship" is not immune. I thought I was in one. Hell, I was flying rich and famous people all over the world and Regret, so I thought, was happy with everything. Unless both parties have great communication - a marriage is never immune, in my opinion.


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## Shooboomafoo (Mar 30, 2011)

Dude. 
My ex moved her OM in 3 months after I moved out. After 14 years of living there, having a kid, and moving her mother in for the 3rd time in our marriage.
I thought everything was just fine. I was currently in the state of "providing her room" and not being clingy, needy as she so stated. Problem is, we lived like statues for years, very little intimacy or expression of affection. That was "her way". 
Then, several years down the road and old highschool boyfriends captured her attention and she decided our marriage was over. I found out only after she had gone and been with dude #1. After he turned out to be a prick, and she realized it, she had old boyfriend #2 in the works, and this was when I was looking for my own house as the divorce had been scheduled. 
I watched her get ready for dates. Try to pack in all that accumulated waistline into ineffectively tight clothing, new jewelery, hairstyle haircolor, new tattoos.. just went off the deep end after hitting 39. 

Ive agreed all along that this guy she has living in what once was our marital home has no character, to have involved himself in a family, and allow himself to be a part of it falling apart. He knew she was married, so shame on him. Problem is, he very evidently does not have the mental capacity to understand a matter this deeply, and its probably why the ex picked him, so she could run the show, and he would worship her. 

Two empty people pretending to have something, having been derived from such occurances and choices, does not seem like it would have much to it.


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## Headspin (May 13, 2012)

Horizon said:


> Before I get to my topic - I've been surfing around here a bit, reading as much as I can...anyway, do some of you agree that a "happy relationship" is no guarantee that infidelity will not occurr? Based on what some have described, it seems that cheating can happen no matter how imune you might think your are.


"Happy" marriage mmm. It's difficult is'nt it.

Speaking for myself I was happy, I was content. I had misgivings about this or that, did'nt like this or that but upon weighing everything up every now and again I came to the conclusion that this was for life and that her good bits far outweighed her bad bits - until the last years or so.

In 15 yrs I had a couple of situations that could have made me look at somebody else, one from way back who definitely was a 'missed opportunity' but I bit my lip made the correct decisions and was happy with that.

I know that my wife was 'happy' - led a rich lazyish part time employment easy life that gave her everything she said she desired. Two great kids husband happy to house husband ................upon reflection far too easy for her

For the most part brilliant regular sex unless health or illness got in the way. Sexually our desire never really dropped. 

So why did she look elsewhere? because as she opined she felt something was missing and every now and again a 'new' man would provide that fresh excitement that fog of mystery romance forbidden fruit that she simple could never move away from. She was simply incapable of pressing the 'stop' button whenever this started up
Here's an example - after the birth of our girl in 2002 I got this - "I resent not having my wild sexual early girly 20's.......because I met you!!" Well even then I thought there's only one way this will end if you genuinely feel that. Guess what ! 

She knew she felt that and that was the biggest deception in our marriage because she knew that ultimately she was lying about herself and her true feelings for me. No matter how much she said she loved me - it was not enough. The whole life we had no matter how good was simply never enough. Now I put some of that down to her mental condition and her disorders or mixture thereof but ultimately you can only put it down to her choosing that path - which she did

She knew where it was all heading all the time and could have pulled up and left 8/9 years ago but chose to stay in it and destroy everybody whilst living the lie of being 'happy'


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## javawave (Apr 7, 2013)

The comfort level in a "great" relationship can make an affair even easier to happen. Or at least hide. Fewer questions asked, a higher level of trust. I thought I had a good relationship and it would it never happen to me. When the other guy came into the picture... slowly.... I didn't even bat an eye until it was a huge problem. Too much trust in her and our relationship.


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## Surfermiquel (Apr 22, 2013)

As for me it was the titanic, nice marriage cruise.

Then one night the iceberg came in the form a fling.

All went down no survivors.

Prior to the night, perfect, wife., life and world.


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## Shooboomafoo (Mar 30, 2011)

And THEN,,,,

The dude she moves into the marital home gets to immediately enjoy time with your kids! To become the "Good ol' guy" that mommy loves. Their "friend"...
OH yah,, and theres you too, you know... "dad",,, that guy that was cast out of the house and now lives by himself, and sees his kid the same amount of time as this stranger that is ingratiating himself with your kids. Suddenly, that LOOKS LIKE A FAMILY, over there, and here you are, just tooling about hoping youve retained some relevance in the picture, watching the evil theyve committed against you, that effected the most sacred and important components that effectually make you who you are, be dismissed as a mere "event" that "is what it is" and now YOU must just "move on"...


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## Headspin (May 13, 2012)

Surfermiquel said:


> As for me it was the titanic, nice marriage cruise.
> 
> Then one night the iceberg came in the form a fling.
> 
> ...


:lol:

I know it's serious all this stuff but forgive me that is a classical funny analogy


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## The Middleman (Apr 30, 2012)

Horizon said:


> Before I get to my topic - I've been surfing around here a bit, reading as much as I can...anyway, do some of you agree that a "happy relationship" is no guarantee that infidelity will not occurr? Based on what some have described, it seems that cheating can happen no matter how imune you might think your are.
> 
> Now...over the last 2 days I have been plagued by revenge thoughts against the OM. I was so overwhelmed that I have plotted how I'm going to rock his world with some in your face "publicity". I have re-named the snake "Scott Free" because he's got off scott free and I don't like it one bit. Guess it's a normal response but I haven't met this pr**k live yet and hell I want to. Yes, could be a bad move. This has all blown out because I have attempted contact but he is not responding - hoping I'll just go away. Fires me up it does!
> 
> PS: partner has expressed more remorse and is really trying to reach out to me. I'm still hot and cold - tonight couldn't stand to be near her. At least I'm working this week.


Question for you.

While I understand and agree that you need to make the OM pay, the real problem was your wife. She committed the crime against you. My question is: What have you done to make her pay for her crime against you? What can you do to make her feel the same pain your are feeling? If the answer is nothing, you can change her name to Scott Free as well.


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## Headspin (May 13, 2012)

The Middleman said:


> Question for you.
> 
> While I understand and agree that you need to make the OM pay, the real problem was your wife. She committed the crime against you. My question is: What have you done to make her pay for your crime against you? What can you do to make her feel the same pain your are feeling? If the answer is nothing, you can change her name to Scott Free as well.


hehe I see what you did there


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## Aunt Ava (Jan 24, 2013)

Hmmm, sad for all the decent guys named Scott (sorry, I have known several great guys named Scott). 

Use your imagination, I'm sure you can do better. How about Weasel Willy? Doug the Douche?


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## Horizon (Apr 4, 2013)

Aunt Ava said:


> Hmmm, sad for all the decent guys named Scott (sorry, I have known several great guys named Scott).
> 
> Use your imagination, I'm sure you can do better. How about Weasel Willy? Doug the Douche?


Hence the expression "Great Scott". I get it! 

I guess "Scum Bag" will do.


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

And. Cheaterville is the place to forever document the OMs moral character to help warn other husbands when he becomes just a friend to their wives 

It's basically a community service posting him there.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Toffer (Jan 31, 2012)

OP,

Also remember where this ulimate betrayl came from - your spouse

I'm not saying that you shouldn't also rock the OM's world a little but stay away from anything that could land you in jail!


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## Horizon (Apr 4, 2013)

Toffer said:


> OP,
> 
> Also remember where this ulimate betrayl came from - your spouse
> 
> I'm not saying that you shouldn't also rock the OM's world a little but stay away from anything that could land you in jail!


Yes, I'm not done with her even though we are reconciling. His silence is a way of calling my bluff, calling me out. Got to think subtle. I think the Cheaterville thing is a defammation no go zone here in OZ. What I will do is talk to my cop/lawyer contacts and see what is "admissable" and what's not. Gotta have a bit of fun.


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## roostr (Oct 20, 2012)

Thing is, if it wasnt him it would have been somebody else, wife is the real problem. But I know what you mean.


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## The-Deceived (Jan 8, 2013)

SomedayDig said:


> Cheaterville . com
> 
> It's an easy way and fairly effortless. My own story has been written quite a few times, but in case you haven't heard it - I put the xOM on the site last August. He WAS an attorney. In a very short few weeks the cheaterville site was the #1 in a Google search for his name. I also took advantage of the "send anonymous email" function and sent the link to his top 2 partners in the firm. It is a large firm with 10 offices in the state. He WAS the senior counsel for his office.
> 
> ...


Whoa! You owned that punk! Nice work brother.


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