# Why do the coping have to be so tough??



## Kevin281 (Nov 6, 2013)

My wife and I have been seperated now for over a month heading into two months. We have no contact whatsoever in fact she have a protetive order against me and have change her phone number on me. When I try to communicate with her through texts she turn her phone off all night. Our marriage always have its difficulties because of it being interracial. Her parents never did accept me and never did meet me face to face. My mother also did not agree to my marriage until it was too late. So basically we had each other but I knew it always bothered my wife she never had her parents approval, so she she stop talking to them and visiting them all together which bothered me. During her past birthday just before things started falling apart none of her family had called her on her birthday and that really hit me in the heart So i tried to convince her to be the bigger person and try to reach out to them and talk to them on her birthday but she refuse which led to a argument between us and then it exploded into me hitting her in her face out of anger while she tried to stop me from leaving the apartment. The next day was no better, earlier that morning she left early in the morning and took a walk conteplating if she should leave me or not. she finally decided to leave me after talking to her Supervisor(who is a women). She went back to the apartment and started packing. When I return to the apartment all of her belongs were gone. I call her to see where she was at and she told me she was in the leasing office waiting for her supervisor to come pick her up. I convince her to come back to the apartment where again we got in a physical fight. she ran back up front and I needed to go for a ride to clear my mind. when I return the police where there ready to arrest me but according to leasing agents she begged and plead for them not to arrest me but once domestic violence is involve they have to make a arrest. I was arrested and spent 8 days in jail. When I return to the apartment all the bills that were in my wife name were all torn up along with a couple of brand new shirts she bought. I tried to reach her but she never answered and ended up chaning her phone number. She went to stay at a women shelter for three weeks. A couple of weeks later i get serve with a protective order from her. In the affidvait she explain the events and claims she is afraid of me.

At court I was surprise to see that her parents were there to support her. on the stand she clearly was shaky in her testimony. different from the affidavit she said that the leasing people call the police but she said in the affidavit and the leasing flat out told me she call the police. she also told me the D.a that I warn her before i hit her. she took personal shots at me saying that I should have gone to anger management and that our marriage was over. I love her dearly but I do admit I have been abusive to my wife in the past. How could she change so suddenly? I risk everything for her. I have a tattoo of her name on my arm and she have a tattoo of my name in a heart over her heart. The day all this happen she requested that day off to spend it with me. Just days before she texts me saying how blessed she was to have me as a husband and that she cant wait to have a family with me. On her birthday we had plans to have a very romatic night which didnt happen because i was tired from work that day which disappointed her.What happen to her?

Now im just waiting on divorce paper to be serve but i havent recieve them yet?


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

What happened to her? Besides the fact that you got physical a couple of times, including punching her in the face?

Get yourself in anger management and counselling. Demonstrate that you're serious about taking responsibility for your actions and making sure it doesn't happen again. And if things don't work out with your current wife, maybe it will make you a better husband or partner for another partner. 

C


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## ne9907 (Jul 17, 2013)

> I love her dearly but I do admit I have been abusive to my wife in the past. How could she change so suddenly?


She probably got tired of the fighting and abuse.
You sound like you are toxic to each other. Do you and your wife a favor and file for divorce.

Once physical, or any kind, of abuse happens in a relationship it is over. OVER


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