# I screwed up our finances



## shart (Aug 18, 2013)

I have been married for 22yrs and just tired and messing up everything I have handle most of the finances so my husband would never stress. But since two years ago our income dcreased I have not been able to keep up. Now this week I have to sit down with him and tell him we need to sale house or it will foreclose. Which I know will end everything I just hate confrontation it literally makes me ill. I know this won't go away on its own. But I have resented our house for sometime too big and maintenance on it is too much. I am afraid I have desappointed everyone. Hopeless i have started taking meds for my anxiety and stress.


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## LoveAtDaisys (Jul 3, 2013)

Either you tell him or he finds out when the bank calls.

He's going to be p!ssed off. But I can see the fallout being a thousand times worse if he finds out on his own. The confrontation in scenario 2 is so much worse.


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## bunny23 (May 19, 2011)

Can you refinance? look into solutions, then tell him the problem and possible solutions you have found.

But tell him.


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## kezins (Aug 25, 2013)

Before the bank nails you, look into the Home Affordable Modification Program. They can reduce your payments to match income. Once you are foreclosed on, your credit will tank and ypu basically just gave the bank a ton of free money you worked for. 

Home Affordable Modification Program


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

kezins said:


> Before the bank nails you, look into the Home Affordable Modification Program. They can reduce your payments to match income. Once you are foreclosed on, your credit will tank and ypu basically just gave the bank a ton of free money you worked for.
> 
> Home Affordable Modification Program


what a joke look at the qulifications the average person will never quailfy for this program!


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## Clark G (Sep 5, 2012)

Yes you have options as mentioned above. You two should be sitting down and going over these financial matters on a regular basis. There's no way in hell I'm turning over financial control to anyone else without understanding what's going on.

He will react in one of two ways depending on your relationship and how he is as a person 

1. He'll be pissed and blame you for all of this. But he is responsible too for knowing what's happening in the home.

2. He'll be upset and concerned and indicate that you will work it out together b/c your relationship/marriage is far more important than a home.

Bottom line is be upfront. If you cannot with your husband there are other issues involved, but like others said you can't sweep this one under the rug unless you find some sort of fix.

Joe


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