# I Want To Be Loved again and Love again



## Sparkles422 (Jun 3, 2011)

now I have had a set back. I don't know why. Just seeing the stbxh each day at some point is difficult. Then I saw this movie and that's when it hit me:

*I wish I was loved and that I loved someone, again*. I am lonely for male companionship but not pick up type. I have had offers and I am not interested in that at all. I want the trust and warmth and companionship that I saw in that movie.

Okay romantic movies out....family movies out....romantic music out.....

I know I am not ready, maybe this is mourning again. I was feeling stronger for a few days and now this again. I am tired of mourning. Go away!

My divorce will be done in 7 days from today. I don't even know how I feel about that.


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

You should watch Lars and the Real Girl.
Or something like Bonneville.
They are love stories but realistic and focus a lot on community love as well. 
Plus they have awesome soundtracks.
What movie did you watch that set you off?
I'll avoid it!


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## Sparkles422 (Jun 3, 2011)

oh yes, it wasn't even that good (fairytale since she had unlimited wads of cash but still..)
Eat love and pray or something similar to that.

By all means, avoid it. I am in such a tender mindset that that movie made me cry. Hah! Maybe the book is better, which is often the case.


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

How about Last Holiday?
I think that was it...the lady works in a store and gets a fatal diagnosis so she cashes out her inheritance she was saving for a rainy day and starts pursuing her dreams. Awesome movie. It has a few long drawn out scenes like the road avalance and stuff but overall it's a feel-good movie.


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## Sparkles422 (Jun 3, 2011)

Last Holiday? No no no no to death, too scary. Just got a call from my realtor and they found a spot on his lung, naturally he is scared. But it could be just a shadow! or something?

Believe it or not: fantasy movies for me such as Game of Thrones, Lord of the Rings, you know stuff that really doesn't exist. Yes I can easily forget myself in that.

There was this guy that was sharing the other day in a meeting and he goes very proudly, " Man I was driving and I didn't think about myself for 2 mintues, wahoo." Very funny. I tend to think about myself and my feelings way way too much. Hopefully as I progress this will pass like other unwanted things. HA HA


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## caughtdreaming (May 30, 2011)

Sparkles422 said:


> *I wish I was loved and that I loved someone, again*. I am lonely for male companionship but not pick up type. I have had offers and I am not interested in that at all. I want the trust and warmth and companionship that I saw in that movie.


I completely understand. 
I know I am no way even near being ready, but I miss companionship, intimacy, and everything to the point of where I want to just go out and meet someone just to be with someone. 

I know this isn't right of course.
Even though I can't picture myself with anyone but stbx, I'm beginning to think that feeling will fade with some work and time.

The big thing that holds me back from believing I will ever get over my stbx is that I won't be able to find someone who I would generally like to be with again.

How many people out there would be able to get me? I think about it and I can't stand/do not like a lot of things in life that other people like. What if the second time around I have to settle for someone who likes everything I can't stand. I think about this a lot and what if there really is no one out there for me!


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## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

caughtdreaming said:


> I completely understand.
> I know I am no way even near being ready, but I miss companionship, intimacy, and everything to the point of where I want to just go out and meet someone just to be with someone.
> 
> I know this isn't right of course.
> ...


Yeah, that sums it up for me, there is a lot of history with my FXW most of it good, with a few painful moments that somehow overshadow everything else. Can't honestly see myself having the kind of chemistry I had with her, believe myself to be completely unlikeable, and am not really looking forward to restarting all that goes into a LTR. And when I do meet someone who I find amazing I'll probably be too intimidated yet again to pursue anything. When this divorce is done I'll go out looking for a little fun, but I'm such a drab person that it will probably mean more single tickets to matinees like old times, which is okay, just gets lonely.


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## Shooboomafoo (Mar 30, 2011)

MEE TOOO!!!!
I hope I dont jeapardize my ability to have a joyful experience with someone long term, by the mistrust thats been shoved on me.
I can guarantee, that its going to be awhile before I get involved again. I desperately NEED some "me" time. If only to recover from the injuries of recently. What kind of things do you guys want/like/dislike/hope for?


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## caughtdreaming (May 30, 2011)

Shooboomafoo said:


> What kind of things do you guys want/like/dislike/hope for?


I don't know!
I'll have to think that one over, then post my thoughts later!


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

Peaceful easy feeling along with the tra-la-la/boom boom feeling.
That's what I want. To have my center of balance under me AND to feel like I can be swept off my feet safely and put back down again in more or less the same place.
I certainly did not ever have this with STBXH.


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## troy (Jan 30, 2011)

Sparkles422 said:


> now I have had a set back. I don't know why. Just seeing the stbxh each day at some point is difficult. Then I saw this movie and that's when it hit me:
> 
> *I wish I was loved and that I loved someone, again*. I am lonely for male companionship but not pick up type. I have had offers and I am not interested in that at all. I want the trust and warmth and companionship that I saw in that movie.


Well Sparkles, as you know, the loneliness was too much and I gave in with someone I recently met even though I am not ready. I know this is wrong, so stay strong and wait until you are ready. You will find love again, or love will find you once you are ready to receive it.


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## everantisocial (Jun 29, 2010)

I'm at the 'there will be someone, not yet but he will appear when I am ready' stage.

Like you I am fed up of the loneliness and lack of companionship but right now I am prepared to tough it out knowing that it won't be forever. At the start of all this everything seemed like it would never change...I will cry forever, I will never be able to face people again, I will hurt this way forever, I will be alone forever if he doesn't come back.....but they aren't forever they are passing phases. I still miss my ex, he will always have a place in my heart and even now if he turned up on my doorstep I would think about taking him back, but now I don't wake up each day thinking 'today will be the day he comes back'. 

We won't always be alone, we found love once, we will again.


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## StartingAgain (Jun 29, 2011)

Please read it all, take away from it what you want. Especially #5!

10 Ways To Practice Nurturing Your Intention > Wayne W. Dyer


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