# Where do I start to pick up all the pieces



## FOH (Jun 29, 2013)

Before the divorce, I had a great job, savings, stock and thought that I had finally found peace. In the period of 2 years I am deep in debt, stole all my savings, sold all the stock we owned. And left me sick and broke. He even has his girlfriend get me arrested after all I did for him. Now I have nothing. Can anyone come back from this? I have never been in debt like this. In turn my STBX got to retire spend all our savings and he has something I always had which was stability. This whole divorce has made me hate the justice system, not believe that there is NO fairness for those of us who do not CHEAT. Any of you who have gone through this how do you come back from it?


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## COguy (Dec 1, 2011)

Well, she took half my 401k, while I got left with all of the debt, not including all the attorney fees and court costs I had to pay for.

But I have my job, and I got rid of the leech, and for my ~$125K of financial losses that I took from the divorce, I got a better education than if I had gone to MIT, Harvard, and Yale combined.

It was only a mistake if you don't learn from it.


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## EnjoliWoman (Jul 2, 2012)

Ha - before the divorce I gave up 3 401k accounts I had started because ex needed the money for his next great idea. Before the divorce we lost one of our homes due to foreclosure because he wanted too much too soon without the necessary financial stability and we had to move into our rental. Before the divorce he was always paying bills with credit cards.

Now I own a home, have a nice chunk in my 401k, own my car and live *mostly* within my means with very little debt (so little I can pay it all in under a year without sacrificing anything like cable, etc.)

He is living with his mother - partly because she is elderly - partly because he can't afford his own place.


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## Alpha (Feb 18, 2013)

There is always hope. Have a plan, put it into action, and persevere.

Remember that in this game called life, the only time you can be considered a failure or a loser is when you decide to quit.


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## Mo42 (Jul 25, 2013)

Matthew 19:21
Jesus answered, "If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me."


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## indiecat (Sep 24, 2012)

His gf had you arrested? What a pair of losers they are. Someone told me once, 'you have your dignity' and that is worth a lot.


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## FOH (Jun 29, 2013)

Yes, he had me come over to talk. I had no idea she was there and the next thing I know the cops are knocking on my window as I am in the street. Asked me to leave and then when I get home then arrest me. He even went to court with her know I did nothing. The judge made him leave because I told him that he was my husband living with her. They dismissed the charges but I still have to get it expunged. This dude even claim me on his income taxes in 2012 and now for 2013 and we divorced in june. I just want this over so i can move on.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

FOH said:


> This dude even claim me on his income taxes in 2012 and now for 2013 and we divorced in june. I just want this over so i can move on.


You could probably get him in hot water for that.


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## 6301 (May 11, 2013)

FOH said:


> This dude even claim me on his income taxes in 2012 and now for 2013 and we divorced in june. I just want this over so i can move on.


 Call the IRS and report it. The IRS frowns when they get cheated.

My first wife got a court injunction and I was told that I can't use any of my equipment (I was self employed and had machinery) and almost went broke.

Finally with help from my lawyer we gave my case and told the court that how in the hell can I give her half the worth when I can't earn a income. I was told to sell it by her lawyer and I told him to go screw himself.

Finally a contractor I did a whole lot of work over the years and always gave him his moneys worth, called my STBXW and told her to come to his office and pick up her money. When he saw her he told her that to take away a man's ability to earn a living is lower than whale $h!t and now that she has her money, she can take it with her just as long as she signs a release making no further claims on me.

She did and then I found out what he did and couldn't believe that would go the extra mile for me. We worked out a payment plan and paid him off.

Long story short. An income and you build off of it and maybe your living conditions might not be as good as it was when you were married but IT'S YOURS. Good luck


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