# Drop hint to OW that I know? OPINIONS!



## Anonny123 (Aug 11, 2010)

There's a good chance I may be running into the OW (really a just a girl - no where near a woman yet - a damn teenager!)

In the event I happen to be near here do I drop the hint (I know she hung out w my H while I was away on a short weekend trip this summer)? 

I want to say: "did you guys have fun while I was in Vegas?" and just walk away

OPINIONS PLEASE


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## ktilash (May 27, 2010)

I think it would be best to leave it alone. You should take it up with your husband.


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

I thought you were getting a divorce because he had way too many vices to fix? I wouldn't say a word to this woman. She knows he is married and it isn't bothering her. I think bring this problem up in a social setting could end up back firing on you. If you want to say something, write her a letter and mail it.


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## Anonny123 (Aug 11, 2010)

Def need to take up the issues with my husband - w/o a doubt but it wold feel so good letting that little skank know I'm on to them... uughh

@827 - Divorce is totally over all of his vices. Did something I say confuse you?


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

Anonny123 said:


> @827 - Divorce is totally over all of his vices. Did something I say confuse you?


That's what I thought. With that being the case, I certainly wouldn't waste the energy to say a word to the OW. I would hate for a "blow up" to occur and you look bad. That's happened to me a few times and it wasn't pretty. My narcissistic husband knew how to engineer those things though. I guess what I'm saying is to be the "bigger person" at this gathering and ignore the OW.

I know you really want to let the OW know what a piece of human garbage she is. I can't blame you there! Go for it--but do it privately (as in a well written card or letter). In the note, tell her to be sure to enjoy your husband....and hope she doesn't mind sharing him with XXX (insert names of the other women). I did something similar to that once; it really made me feel better. And I did it without a scene.


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## Anonny123 (Aug 11, 2010)

Thanks for the advice 827. I may end up seeing her at a wake and it really wouldn't be appropriate - maybe if it were out in the parking lot... 

I really feel like sending all the girls messages on FB b/c I found a lot of them onthere and definitely mentioning that their not the only ones... guess we'll have to see.


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## calimom82 (Jan 25, 2009)

I agree, it would be best to take it up with your husband. Rise above!


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## BlueEyedBeauty (Sep 27, 2010)

If I were you; I would leave this alone-​ ​all you are going to do is open up even more can of worms. I know you're very much in love with your husband- as you wish he would show you all his love toward you; and he doesn't. If you were though to ask anything about him having fun; you're just going to cause more trouble- he will then take more out of it then what you are asking because he was guilty on the part of cheating while you were gone.

I really do not even know why​People, are always thinking that they have to cheat. It just is not right for people to be doing this and if you are going to be sleeping with more than one person; then you should not even think about making a comment with a person. Why, can't people just look at it the way it is? Cheating is not right and it is something you, would not do if you love the person you are with... When more people realize this then we would have less break-ups, less divorces, less fighting and there would be more happiness throughout this world and more love that is given...​


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

kick her butt;-)
No, you have nothing long term to gain.
It will only fell good until the cops show up.
I agree w/ 827 go on FB and let the word out. Be warned, the OW may retaliate and you could be caught in something you might want to move on from.


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## midwestshopgrl (Sep 24, 2010)

I can understand as well that you want to confront this girl, but you will only make yourself feel worse! It sucks that the OW get to be 50% of helping ruin lives and appear to not get 50% of the repercussions but I always have to trust in knowing that what goes around comes around-she WILL get hers in the end!


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## Anonny123 (Aug 11, 2010)

midwestshopgrl said:


> I can understand as well that you want to confront this girl, but you will only make yourself feel worse! It sucks that the OW get to be 50% of helping ruin lives and appear to not get 50% of the repercussions but I always have to trust in knowing that what goes around comes around-she WILL get hers in the end!


Thanks all - I truly believe in what goes around comes around and the little skank will get hers one day even if its 5, 1-, 20 yrs from now!!


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## DanF (Sep 27, 2010)

Anonny123 said:


> Thanks all - I truly believe in what goes around comes around and the little skank will get hers one day even if its 5, 1-, 20 yrs from now!!


Well, I will be the lone dissenter here.
I think that that if you happen to see the little trollop, tell her that if she likes having one night stands to please do it with single guys and not married men. One day an angry wife may just give her what she deserves.


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## turnera (Jan 22, 2010)

Actually, if she's a teenager, you're wasting your effort telling HER you know what she did. 

You're much better spending your time visiting her PARENTS and telling them what she did.


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## Braelynn21203 (Oct 4, 2010)

You could say something, and I'm sure you would feel better about calling her out in public. With you verbally attacking you, you also need to be prepared what if it goes very wrong and she tries to attack you?

Ultimately, it really doesn't solve anything. And I think you should just avoid her and move on with your life and make yourself happy.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

When you get to the wake, throw her in the casket and close the lid, then scream out "I"LL BURY YOU B**CH".
No, not a good idea, well how about a big smile, a smile is worth a thousand words. This will keep her quessing.


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## Anonny123 (Aug 11, 2010)

the guy said:


> When you get to the wake, throw her in the casket and close the lid, then scream out "I"LL BURY YOU B**CH".
> No, not a good idea, well how about a big smile, a smile is worth a thousand words. This will keep her quessing.


Thanks Guy


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## ThinkTooMuch (Aug 6, 2010)

Anonny123 said:


> There's a good chance I may be running into the OW (really a just a girl - no where near a woman yet - a damn teenager!)
> 
> In the event I happen to be near here do I drop the hint (I know she hung out w my H while I was away on a short weekend trip this summer)?
> 
> ...


Anonny,

Please don't confront her, you may find it satisfying, but I can tell you you'll regret it.

I've seen several cases of women fighting over a guy, the nominal winner lost becoming the topic of gossip and many deprecations. Given your stbx h, let the new girls in his life fight over him, he's not worth the time or effort as these girls will find out.

Mark


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## valaria (Oct 18, 2010)

The Guy

Your post made me laugh, but instead of saying "I'll bury you [email protected]@ch" she should smile and tell the OW " I'm finished with him now, you are more than welcome to my leftovers"


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## Trooper (Oct 21, 2010)

I agree with Turnera - how old is the girl anyway? Maybe a conversation with the parents would actually be a good idea. If she is living at their house I am sure they would be interested to know how she is spending her time.


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## recursive (Nov 2, 2010)

Oh man, this is such a touchy subject. In the end the tragedy of these kinds of situations is that YOU, who are the victim, end up looking like the crazy person. I do know this from experience. You're the one hurt, so you're the one that wants to act out in some way and all this does is make you appear emotionally out of control, weak and unstable. Look at Jennifer Aniston. I know. i totally took it to the celebrity gossip level. But really years after the relationship ended when Brad cheated on her with Angelina, she's still the one people look down on and feel sad for. 

The best thing to do is keep as much of your grace, pride and elegance about you and move on with your life. That will make both of the other parties appear worst than anything you could do. 

And if you do feel like you need to do something. And I'm prepping this by saying it's pretty passive aggressive but kinda funny. I basically found online sites about things pertaining to the OW's weaknesses (ie. demeaning her self by being the other woman, her insecurities about her weight, why even after she cheated with my boyfriend, she still couldn't get a boyfriend for years, depression websites, plastic surgery consultations) and i signed her up for every email, newsletter, consultation I could find to flood her inbox. I sent it to her using her own email address so she couldn't trace it back to who sent it. It's juvenile. But it personally made me feel better that she was getting a (private) clue to what a horrible person she was choosing to be.


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## Anonny123 (Aug 11, 2010)

Thanks recursive. I never confronted her and think it's best I didnt


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## WhereAmI (Nov 3, 2010)

I'd say something like, "I've been praying for you." You'd have to try to make it seem genuine, though. Like you're concerned for her. It would drive her crazy, but you'd seem like a saint.


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## Anonny123 (Aug 11, 2010)

hahah Where Am I. I think the best thing is for me to walk away - let them have him!


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