# Day 3 of hell



## IdleTuesday (Nov 30, 2011)

9 years. One 8-year old child. 

Husband (God it hurts typing that word) wants a divorce. I've put him through too much pain - it doesn't matter what it was, it can't be undone.

A year and a half ago I saw the error of my ways and corrected it. We were working on our marriage and he made an appointment (coming up) to see a psychologist for the numbness he feels for the pain I put him through.

He told me 3 days ago he does not love me anymore. There is no hope. I asked him to file the papers ASAP to make it as painless as possible.

But there is so much pain - I've never felt pain like this. I told my son yesterday about this and how we will be moving to stay with my sister. He had a nightmare yesterday that we were in my sister's town "a really long time" and when he came back daddy wasn't here and the house was rearranged. Probably the first of many tears and nightmares and I can't bear his pain I can barely bear my own.

If others can tell me what it was like in the first few weeks I think it would help me. I can't eat and the pain in my chest is ever-present. I can't make it, this is too much pain.

Please no talk of reconciliation there is no hope and it won't help me get through this hell as I need to let this reality sink in as deep as possible.

Help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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## HerToo (Oct 3, 2011)

Counseling for you and your son will help carry you through. Talk to lots of people, and surround yourself with friends and family. I've never been in your situation, but know that you are not alone. If it can't be undone, was it an affair? I had one. It can't be undone. It's painful for everyone.

I hope others come along and offer some sound advice from their experience.

I could end up like you sooner or later, but without young kids.

Sorry you are in a rough period of your life. But it will get better.


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## Janie (Apr 10, 2010)

The pain WILL lessen over time and you WILL be able to breathe again. But, not yet. 

At this point, you have no option but to move ahead with your new life one day at a time. Stay task-oriented and allow yourself under-performance. And work for better the next day. Find a way to release your energy productively - I began a vigorous walking routine that helps invigorate my mind, body and soul. 

And just keep pushing on. And (I'm hoping) one day life will feel 'normal' again...
Just a 'new normal'...

At least that's what I keep telling myself...


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