# In front, behind, or beside?



## CallaLily

Ok guys, When you're out with your wife or g/f do you walk in front of her? Behind her? Or do you walk beside her? It could be anywhere, grocery store, dept store, just strolling long for a walk etc. 

After a few replies I will tell you the reason for my question on this.


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## KathyBatesel

My husband and I don't really have a defined pattern. It can be either, except we never get far from each other and if there is ice or it's really cold, we link arms.


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## BrookeT

Usually beside, if that isn't possible he's usually behind me with his hand on the small of my back or something.


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## CharlieParker

I try to stay beside her but sometimes do wind up a bit a head of her. She's not always the steadiest on her feet (no ice needed) and likes to grab hold when needed .


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## 41362

Usually to the side, but a step or so behind...

... the view is amazing


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## anchorwatch

Beside.


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## Almostrecovered

judging by the title I thought this thread belonged in the sex forum


I tend to be ahead of my wife when walking because my stride is longer, I'm constantly stopping to let her catch up. Drives her nuts.


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## d4life

This is going to be funny! It may be a control thing, right?

The reason I say that is because I just noticed the way my Husband and I were walking together recently. 

When we go to the grocery store, he likes to take control as he normally plans the meals and I cook them. He knows what all we need and so on. Normally he goes by himself so when he wants me to go with him to help I normally just tag along but I have noticed that he is like a run away train and rushes through. Most of the time I find myself following him around until we stop to discuss something.

This year while we were Christmas shopping for the kids, he really had no clue what were were doing. :rofl: I led us through the mall with the kids and we went to different stores. Sometimes we would split us with him taking my son and I would take my daughter. When we got back together though, I found him always waking behind.  I guess it's because he was just following us because he didn't know we would be going next. Plus, he hates to shop. 

While we are on vacation, if we are relaxed in Gatlinburg or the beach and walking around we will be side by side. If we are in Disney World he will be behind us most of the time. I think it's because he wants us to lead because he is just along for the ride, doesn't know where we want to go and he knows that I have a plan so he will follow me and the kids.  

In just everyday walking in general, we are normally side by side or he will follow. He will even say ladies first.  I thought he was just being polite, but watch this end up showing that I think I'm the boss or something. :rofl:


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## KathyBatesel

^ That reminded me of us. I think it's funny sometimes. He has a longer stride, so it's when we're relaxed that he usually ends up in front, because at other times I'm the faster of us usually and very "mission oriented." I will shotgun through the grocery store or gift shopping because I HATE shopping. He loves it.

When we went to the mall to do Christmas shopping this year, he purposely stepped back and said he'd follow me. I was thinking "?!?!??!!!" and said, "Oh, no! I'll just lead us back to the car." So the whole time we were at the mall, it was a crazy back and forth of who was leading and who was lagging.


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## Thoreau

Normal walking, beside.

Behind going through doors.

In front going down stairs.

Behind going upstairs.


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## Hope4thebest

If we are walking down a sidewalk I walk beside her with me on the road side.. If we are walking in a resteraunt I will walk behind her while we are being seated.. The only time I am ever in front of her is if we are grocery shopping and she stops to check something out...


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## CallaLily

Thanks for the replies. The reason I ask is, this guy I have been seeing for awhile now, always walks behind me. I don't care for that, never have. Now I'm not saying there are not times, I haven't stopped to look at something and he walks ahead and I'm then behind, but I usually catch up to him and try to walk beside of him.

This is happened on more than one occassion and not sure why he does this. Just yesterday we were in the grocery store, he walked behind me the whole time, and if I tired to talk to him he couldn't hear me because he was behind me. I stopped, and he stopped behind me. I asked him nicely if he would walk beside of me, I didn't care for him to walk behind me,plus if I spoke to him or him to me we could hear each other better, he actually got ticked off and walked way ahead of me and turned the corner like a pouty child! :scratchhead: I did not acknowledge this behavior, for I felt it was childish, and this has happened before. Not to where he stormed off, but to where when I asked him to walk beside of me he got kinda ticked off and didn't speak. Wow its that important you walk behind! 

I have asked him why he walks behind me and not beside of me especially if he knows I don't care for that, he never really has an answer. He is way taller than me, maybe if he walks behind me he likes to make eye contact with the women he sees walking toward him and flirts who knows, ha! I find it strange and it might be a deal breaker for me. A deal breaker as in not the fact he doesn't want to walk beside of me really but because he acts like a baby about it when asked.


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## 2ntnuf

Going somewhere she doesn't know. I tried to stay just a half a step or so ahead, slightly leading without losing her. 

Once inside a store, especially a women's clothing store, she led a half step or so, then I would see what she was looking for and start picking things I wanted to see on her.

At her business, I let her lead me so I didn't usurp leadership.

Most other times, I led by a half step or walked beside.


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## Almostrecovered

maybe he just really likes your butt?


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## CallaLily

Almostrecovered said:


> maybe he just really likes your butt?


Could be, but doubt thats the case.


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## 2ntnuf

Your in charge there and he figures you'll complain if he finds something and puts it in the cart, but wants to look for what he would like to have?


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## SadSamIAm

When walking down the street, I walk beside her on the side of the traffic (my dad taught me that is the gentlemen way). 

If we are doing something, it may depend on what we are doing. If we are doing something that is primarily my domain (shopping for sporting goods, etc.) then I walk in front a bit. If we are doing something that is primarily her domain (shopping for groceries/clothes, etc.) then I walk in behind a bit.

I think it is annoying to walk beside each other when grocery shopping. Especially when pushing a cart. Simply just not enough room. You would be forever getting out of other people's way. I hate it when people do this and take up the entire aisle. For us, it is wife walking ahead and picking up products and me behind her, pushing the cart.


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## CharlieParker

CallaLily said:


> He is way taller than me


Likely his gait is much longer than yours and would likely be far ahead of you in no time. Like I said I try to walk beside Mrs P but some times it's hard, and she does get pissed when I "run off".


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## gbrad

It depends. If we are just casually walking then usually next to, she likes to hold hands, I don't as much. But if I am walking with a mission, then I am usually in front, stop so she can catch up, then in front some more. Lovely pattern. If we are going through a crowd I am in front so that I can make a path.


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## CallaLily

2ntnuf said:


> Your in charge there and he figures you'll complain if he finds something and puts it in the cart, but wants to look for what he would like to have?


I'm not in charge, no one is really. I wouldn't complain about what he puts in the cart. We don't live together and buy food separately. I buy things for my own home etc. He can buy whatever he would like.


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## BrookeT

CallaLily said:


> Could be, but doubt thats the case.


Don't bet on it! There is only one time where my husband will ALWAYS walk behind me, anywhere. It's when I am wearing yoga pants. I asked why he does that, and he was honest and told me its because my ass looks good in them and he likes to stare at it.


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## trey69

The main issue here isn't about where he walks, its about the fact he knows how you feel and yet still does it, and then acts like a baby about it when you ask him not to. That should speak volumes. If he is like this with other things as well, take heed! 

Oh yeah and the fact that when you ask him why he does this, he has no answer. Weird, sorry.


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## EnjoliWoman

Ex was always in front and complaining I couldn't keep up "dont' walk behind me like a dog!" - oddly that's how he treated me so I wonder if it was subconscious.

EXBF was like Thoreau - Beside on sidewalk, behind when opening doors or being seated at a restaurant. I don't think we were together enough to encounter stairs except at his house - he followed to turn off lights so I could see where I was going.


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## Thoreau

Stairs are a safety issue. If she should fall going down or up I am there to stop her or break her fall.


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## CallaLily

Thanks for the replies. Its not about having to walk in front of or behind due to stairs or an over crowded Aisle etc, I get that, I'm meaning just in general. 

Trey, thats exactly what its about, thanks!


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## KathyBatesel

What happens if you slow down, then slow down some more, until he either walks ahead or you stay standing still? (Works with other drivers on the road, so it's just a thought, but if you do experiment with it I would like to hear if it works.)


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## In_The_Wind

CallaLily said:


> Ok guys, When you're out with your wife or g/f do you walk in front of her? Behind her? Or do you walk beside her? It could be anywhere, grocery store, dept store, just strolling long for a walk etc.
> 
> After a few replies I will tell you the reason for my question on this.


I walk beside her and normally to the weak side example if a wall or brick bldg is on one side then i would be on the other if that makes sense you know to protect her from being bumped or whatever if its crowded she follows behind me i am pretty big broad shouldered and folks normally get out of my way or make room for us hope that helps


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## In_The_Wind

EnjoliWoman said:


> Ex was always in front and complaining I couldn't keep up "dont' walk behind me like a dog!" - oddly that's how he treated me so I wonder if it was subconscious.
> 
> EXBF was like Thoreau - Beside on sidewalk, behind when opening doors or being seated at a restaurant. I don't think we were together enough to encounter stairs except at his house - he followed to turn off lights so I could see where I was going.


kinda like lead follow or get the hell out of the way type


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## CallaLily

KathyBatesel said:


> What happens if you slow down, then slow down some more, until he either walks ahead or you stay standing still? (Works with other drivers on the road, so it's just a thought, but if you do experiment with it I would like to hear if it works.)


I have done this, and he just stays behind me. He doesn't walk to the side of or ahead of me...I think next time I will be the one to walk behind him. Of course may not be a next time.


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## KathyBatesel

Are you certain you were patient enough? LOL


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## CallaLily

KathyBatesel said:


> Are you certain you were patient enough? LOL


I guess anything is possible, but the main issue is what trey originally said. Its how he reacts when asked, and the fact he keeps doing the same thing I have asked him not to do when he knows how I feel on it.


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## Tall Average Guy

CallaLily said:


> Could be, but doubt thats the case.


But you do suggest it is to look at other women. Why is that?


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## Tall Average Guy

CallaLily said:


> I guess anything is possible, but the main issue is what trey originally said. Its how he reacts when asked, and the fact he keeps doing the same thing I have asked him not to do when he knows how I feel on it.


Assume for a moment that it is because he just really prefers to walk behind you. No real reason, just the way it is (we all have quirks like that which we can't explain). 

Is it so important to you that he walk beside you even if it makes him uncomfortable?


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## CallaLily

Tall Average Guy said:


> But you do suggest it is to look at other women. Why is that?


I was joking, I didnt say that was for sure.


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## CallaLily

Tall Average Guy said:


> Assume for a moment that it is because he just really prefers to walk behind you. No real reason, just the way it is (we all have quirks like that which we can't explain).
> 
> Is it so important to you that he walk beside you even if it makes him uncomfortable?


It has been said several times on here.... its NOT so much about him walking beside me, in front of me, or behind me..its about how he reacts when he is asked and why it is he keeps doing something I don't care for. 

If he is gonna stomp off like a baby because I asked him AGAIN to not walk behind me, then yeah, its best for me to move on.


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## Mavash.

For us there is no defined pattern. If we're just walking he's beside me. If it's around the house he prefers the view from behind. And then sometimes I'm just slow (in heels or with kids) so he's ahead of me. If I'm the one shopping he'll follow me.

So many things I can think of....


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## thatbpguy

CallaLily said:


> Thanks for the replies. The reason I ask is, this guy I have been seeing for awhile now, always walks behind me. I don't care for that, never have. Now I'm not saying there are not times, I haven't stopped to look at something and he walks ahead and I'm then behind, but I usually catch up to him and try to walk beside of him.
> 
> This is happened on more than one occassion and not sure why he does this. Just yesterday we were in the grocery store, he walked behind me the whole time, and if I tired to talk to him he couldn't hear me because he was behind me. I stopped, and he stopped behind me. I asked him nicely if he would walk beside of me, I didn't care for him to walk behind me,plus if I spoke to him or him to me we could hear each other better, he actually got ticked off and walked way ahead of me and turned the corner like a pouty child! :scratchhead: I did not acknowledge this behavior, for I felt it was childish, and this has happened before. Not to where he stormed off, but to where when I asked him to walk beside of me he got kinda ticked off and didn't speak. Wow its that important you walk behind!
> 
> I have asked him why he walks behind me and not beside of me especially if he knows I don't care for that, he never really has an answer. He is way taller than me, maybe if he walks behind me he likes to make eye contact with the women he sees walking toward him and flirts who knows, ha! I find it strange and it might be a deal breaker for me. A deal breaker as in not the fact he doesn't want to walk beside of me really but because he acts like a baby about it when asked.


I don't know if anyone sad this yet, but maybe he's watching your fanny bobble.


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## Anonymous07

My husband almost always walks beside me. I feel awkward if one of us is walking behind the other.


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## SadSamIAm

I think I would get annoyed if my wife told me where to walk when I was with her.


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## d4life

I understand why his reaction would bother you. That's kind of childish. Is everything else good? Are you attracted to him? Has he acted this way any other time? 

I guess I am asking this because there will always be something that drives us crazy about our significant other. My husband hits his teeth with his fork or spoon and I cringe. He hates the way I sneeze. These are just things that we have learned to deal with. 

If you really care about him, talk to him and tell what's bothering you. Tell him that you think he reacted a little childish and that's not attractive. Just be honest with him. That is if you want to try to work it out. There is always someone else out there. 

Sometimes they have little things that they do that we can't work out. That's why you date. You have to weed them out until you find one you can't live without, no matter how messed up they are. &#55357;&#56836;


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## thatbpguy

Wifey and I always walk side by side. We have to. We're always holding hands.


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## Caribbean Man

Thoreau said:


> Normal walking, beside.
> 
> Behind going through doors.
> 
> In front going down stairs.
> 
> Behind going upstairs.


Same here, in fact we often hold hands or just lock index fingers.
If its on a crowded street, she holds on to my upper arm.


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## Emerald

CallaLily said:


> It has been said several times on here.... its NOT so much about him walking beside me, in front of me, or behind me..its about how he reacts when he is asked and why it is he keeps doing something I don't care for.
> 
> If he is gonna stomp off like a baby because I asked him AGAIN to not walk behind me, then yeah, its best for me to move on.


I agree that would be seriously annoying. I can just picture him following you around like a small child or dog........

We walk side by side or I'm behind him when we are in big crowds...he plows the field


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## Shoto1984

Side by side (how else can you talk to each other..) I'm also one who was taught by my dad that a man always puts himself between the lady he's with and the street. The idea being that you're there to protect her. Old school I guess but its automatic for me. Thanks dad )


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## Caribbean Man

Shoto1984 said:


> *I'm also one who was taught by my dad that a man always puts himself between the lady he's with and the street. The idea being that you're there to protect her. Old school I guess but its automatic for me. Thanks dad )*


Same here with me.
I was taught that ever since I was a little boy by older men around me.
Sigh,
Gone are those days!


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