# I curse the moment I married you.



## Dammed (Apr 1, 2011)

Dear All, 

Last night I and my wife were having an argument. She yelled at me “I curse the moment I married you. I think you are the biggest mistake of my life”. I plainly (without raising my voice and with all seriousness) said that I really feel sad that you feel that way. However, if she feels that way I would suggest don’t ruin your life any further and you are free to walkout. She said she not leaving the house. I said fine I appreciate that you can keep the house. I will move out empty handed if that makers her happy. 

She started crying that how worthless a man I am, She means nothing to me, how can I leave her in middle of mess. It took me all night to convince her that I am not dumping her. Morning she asks me to promise her that I would leave her. Even did not allow me to leave for office. 

Now can you explain me this behavior? . Lastly, acknowledging the fact that I still love her (don’t know why but I still do that hopelessly) but she claims I am the biggest mistake of her life should I mentally prepare myself for separation. I mean its one thing saying I can leave her immediately, quite the other doing that.


----------



## ASV (Feb 6, 2011)

Man,i feel for ye,but i would not stick around very long if my wife told me that.
How long you been married?

I have a Son that is more or less in a stuation like you.
I can't figure out why he ain't leaving that bat out of hell.
She owned the house free and clear already before they married 2 yrs ago,and his life has been nothing but hell since.(his words)


----------



## LonelyNLost (Dec 11, 2010)

I guess it's hard to explain, but women say things that they feel at the moment, and it doesn't mean in general. It sounds like she loves you, but is not happy with your relationship right now. She doesn't want to lose you, but you guys have some issues that need to be worked through. Maybe suggest marriage counseling? Say that you want to get to the bottom of why she feels that way and see if you can both be happier in the relationship. Also check out marriagebuilders.com, they have lots of surveys and questionnaires that can pinpoint each of your needs and what you do to irritate the other so you can fix these. Also, the book, The 5 Love Languages is another good one. I wish you luck.


----------



## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

Perhaps she wants you gone but can't do the leaving she can paint herself the victim.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Jamison (Feb 10, 2011)

I think everyone says things or has said things in the heat of the moment before. Alot of times the things people say are not always how they truly feel. Its done when angry which isn't a good thing.

Can you give us a little more background info on what may have sparked the arguement to begin with? What has been going on recently in your marriage to make her feel this way?


----------



## Hicks (Jan 14, 2011)

I wouldn't act on the threat in the moment. But you have to address whatever is lacking in the marriage that let's her have that feeling during a fight.


----------



## Dammed (Apr 1, 2011)

Jamison said:


> I think everyone says things or has said things in the heat of the moment before. Alot of times the things people say are not always how they truly feel. Its done when angry which isn't a good thing.
> 
> Can you give us a little more background info on what may have sparked the arguement to begin with? What has been going on recently in your marriage to make her feel this way?


Well slightly embarrassing question, I asked her for something intimate. She didn’t like the idea, I told her that why it is that always has to behave like a nun preaching me sermons on morality.


----------



## Jamison (Feb 10, 2011)

Dammed said:


> Well slightly embarrassing question, I asked her for something intimate. She didn’t like the idea, I told her that why it is that always has to behave like a nun preaching me sermons on morality.


That was what caused her to tell you she cursed the moment she married you? Did you ask her to do something you already knew she wouldn't agree to or didn't like?


----------



## Dammed (Apr 1, 2011)

Jamison said:


> That was what caused her to tell you she cursed the moment she married you? Did you ask her to do something you already knew she wouldn't agree to or didn't like?


Oh you are asking uncomfortable questions: 

I wanted her to give me a head. I don’t know why she always makes an issue out it. Last time while she was giving it to me, I messed it up. She told me I am never ever getting it again. 

I said sorry, tired to cajole her and then even pleaded for it but no way she responded its immoral. And then I told her not to behave as nun and then it all started. 

Am I the only man asking my wife to cum in her mouth? 

Anyway I have promised her, I will never ask her to do it against her will (I don’t know why I can’t stand my wife crying and this way she always has her way). 

We generally never have any issues between us but for the fact she kind of hates anything everything about sex apart from missionary position creates trouble. 

But problem is you cant just say one minute “I curse the moment I married you” and second minute you want your spouse to promise “He’ll never leave you not even if she tell me anything” How immature.


----------



## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

I got caught out in the rain with the dogs. Saw my wife driving up the street. Stood in the street and waved. She drove right past. No brake lights. Nada. Walked home drenched. She went on how I 'wanted' to be out in the rain....? 

Uh anyway that lead to a bunch of the usual. I told her if I had ever done anything like that to her she'd probably call the cops. She told me "You're a misogynist!" To which I said "I don't hate women, I just hate you."


----------



## Dammed (Apr 1, 2011)

Runs like Dog said:


> I got caught out in the rain with the dogs. Saw my wife driving up the street. Stood in the street and waved. She drove right past. No brake lights. Nada. Walked home drenched. She went on how I 'wanted' to be out in the rain....?
> 
> Uh anyway that lead to a bunch of the usual. I told her if I had ever done anything like that to her she'd probably call the cops. She told me "You're a misogynist!" To which I said "I don't hate women, I just hate you."


Probably the best post I have read all my life..lol.. 

Exactly explains my situation. 

Well let me honest, I haven’t been loved all my life as today. Couldn’t understand my wife all my life. I can never make it she loves me more or hates me. 

Last night she was all cursing me now is treating me like king. I have confession to make, I want a nasty fight every night if morning is going to be this Gr8


----------



## CallaLily (Jan 13, 2011)

Maybe shes bipolar? Maybe she needs some counseling if her moods are like that. Has she ever said why she likes sex only certain ways or why she doesn't like BJ's etc?


----------



## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

Dammed said:


> Oh you are asking uncomfortable questions:
> 
> I wanted her to give me a head. I don’t know why she always makes an issue out it. Last time while she was giving it to me, I messed it up. She told me I am never ever getting it again.
> 
> ...


So you came in her mouth without warning her or telling her? And you know she doesn't like giving BJ's anyway? Dude, you're playing a dangerous game... There's teeth in there, you know? 

Seriously, regardless of her subsequent over-reaction, doing something like that is a good way to never get a BJ again. Her mouth, her rules. Talking about it (asking if she'd let you cum in her mouth) again might be ok in awhile, but ask, get an answer, and let it drop if she says no.

Sounds like things are back to normal now though, so good luck in the future! And I imagine her "better than normal" response this morning is due to her feeling guilty for what she said in the heat of the moment. I wouldn't hold it against her, if it doesn't come up again.

C


----------



## greenpearl (Sep 3, 2010)

Jamison said:


> I think everyone says things or has said things in the heat of the moment before. Alot of times the things people say are not always how they truly feel. Its done when angry which isn't a good thing.
> 
> Can you give us a little more background info on what may have sparked the arguement to begin with? What has been going on recently in your marriage to make her feel this way?


My husband thinks the same way! 

He knows women say silly things when they are angry or bothered, so he never takes my words seriously when I am angry. He just tells me that hurts but he believes that's not really what I mean! 

And he asks me not to make any impulsive decisions. If I want to buy something, he tells me to think more about it, if I still like it the second day, then we will go back there and buy it, just to make sure I don't buy it and regret about it later.


----------



## trey69 (Dec 29, 2010)

It sounds like you did something you already knew she didn't like or wasn't comfortable with, that's why she reacted that way. She had every right, never take it upon yourself to go ahead and do something you already know someone doesn't like. Maybe put yourself in someone elses shoes.


----------



## Ten_year_hubby (Jun 24, 2010)

I'm guessing this was your first time hearing something like this so you're still reacting to the shock. Don't worry, hopefully you won't have to get used to it, but if you do have to, you will. You did what you did and this little bit of abuse is really a small cost to pay imho. There's really no need to overreact and no one should be going anywhere, least of all you. Try not to make this a habit


----------



## Dammed (Apr 1, 2011)

Pandakiss said:


> you sound like my husband and i a few years ago..argue...oral sex, argue...oral sex.
> 
> nothing ever got resolved from the fight so we had the same fight for 10/15 years...he wondered why i didnt llike doing it...well gee..
> 
> ...


Dearest Pandakiss,

Would you be kind enough to let me know in detail how you two sought this out? I will make my wife read that. She is exactly like you she thinks it’s dirty and disgusting. No matter how hard I try to talk her into it, she never gives in. 

I kind of know she doesn’t hate me. I really don’t understand why sex is a universal problem with women in general. One 100% of my friends tell me that how their wife’s would love them to be castrated (...LOL...). Also do you have any counter weapon against tears I always lose battle against? Whenever she cries I become really weak and end of it she has her way. Now last night she forced me to promise never ever ask her for something she does not want to do (read Oral Sex). 




> I'm guessing this was your first time hearing something like this so you're still reacting to the shock. Don't worry, hopefully you won't have to get used to it, but if you do have to, you will. You did what you did and this little bit of abuse is really a small cost to pay imho.


Oh no, I am pretty use to being called things I cannot type here for the purpose of decency. But this time even I was worried anyways now I am cool and informed. When wife says something really bad she is not serious.


----------

