# Thank you, everyone please read



## bhappy3 (Feb 4, 2008)

Wow, I posted on another fourm today, a parenting forum, for my issue I posted here in the parenting area. I cannot believe how rude and insensitive and horrible those people were! I don't know if I can post the name of the forum that I was on or not, so I won't, please, if you want to know, and I can post it, let me know and you can check out the thread. 

I JUST WANT TO THANK ALL OF YOU FOR BEING SO KIND, all the time, through all the issues. On this other forum, the moderators gave really crappy advice, and very little of it, and then were completely offended when I didn't just bow to their bad advice, and I even went so far as to ask for more advice, oh no! The thread went terribly hateful. I have very very little posts there, and I'm sure that will be my last visit. It seems that the moderators are worshipped or something, and the more posts you have, the more you're supposed to just take their crappy advice - question them not you foul peasant! 

This is pretty much the only forum I visit and post on.

Again, I just want to thank all of you for being so decent and strong and humane and kind and accepting and open minded and non judgmental. It really means more than you could possibly know, unless you've been treated like I just was. Wow. 

Sincerely and Lovingly, 

bhappy3


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## sarah.rslp (Jan 2, 2009)

Internet forums are more extreme versions of real world forms of socialising.

The big thing is the anonymity factor, people can take advantage of it to post frankly about their experiences, tell stuff to complete strangers that they wouldn't tell their closest friends. I do it and I'll be honest I get a total kick out of it.

Other people get a kick out of being malicious, Again the anonymity allows them to do it. I'm guessing that's what happened in your case you got a bunch of people firmly embedded in a little network that started to throw advice at you. You can usually tell if it involves a lot of psycho babble that usually finds a home on daytime tv well take it with a grain of salt.

As soon as its obvious that people are just trying to wind you up just forget about it, and find somewhere better.. like here


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## bhappy3 (Feb 4, 2008)

You guys are so much better, all of you. I can't say thank you enough. xoxoxoxoxo


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## dcrim (Oct 1, 2008)

I'm not claiming to be any kind of expert...but I belong to many forums (I found this one from Drac'). 

All of the ones to which I belong are a very nice community of people. This is one of them!  

There are many types of forums...depending on your needs (or desires). This one deals with marriage and all its esoterica. Others deal strictly with sex (in a nice way). Some are dedicated to fetishes or other lifestyles. 

Given the diversity of the internet and the people that frequent it, you will always have a choice of familliars. Find the one that works for you and go for it. 

Were I you, I'd likely drop that one to which you referred (and likely bad mouth them...sigh) and continue also with the one(s) that offered good advice and a compassionate membership. 

I'm glad you're staying here!


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## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

bhappy3 said:


> I JUST WANT TO THANK ALL OF YOU FOR BEING SO KIND, all the time, through all the issues.


that's why i stick to this site, too. i visited others and it was a pretty hostile atmosphere.


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## Chris H. (Jan 27, 2007)

:smthumbup:

Thanks so much for your kind words about TAM. The moderators and I have worked hard to keep this place supportive over the past few years, and they deserve the credit.

When the "trolls" come around to start trouble, we pretty much tell them we don't allow that kind of stuff here, and if they keep it up they get banned 

That's why our #1 rule on the "forum guidelines" is:

1. Treat others on the forum with dignity and respect.

Thanks for your PM too behappy. It makes me feel good about what we're doing when I hear stuff like this.

Chris


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## voivod (Aug 7, 2008)

Chris H. said:


> :smthumbup:
> 
> Thanks so much for your kind words about TAM. The moderators and I have worked hard to keep this place supportive over the past few years, and they deserve the credit.
> 
> ...


i misread it...i thought it said "_tease_ others with dignity and respect"

and you *know* i'm kidding...i love this place


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## bhappy3 (Feb 4, 2008)

This is funny... I was going back to that forum this morning to try to weed out the one or two lines of good advice that I did get, and they banned me forever. Broke my little heart... KIDDING. I'm glad they did b/c I don't even want to be associated with that. Wow. Anyway, when we signed off last night it was on page four, by this morning page six had just gotten started. They spent all of page five bashing me - and I was the troll!! I'm sure our mods wouldn't have let such horrible behavior to continue. So I went there on another computer... haha.

A friend of me told me that I need to toughen up my eskin if I want to post on forums... they can be nasty. TAM is the first forum I was ever on, and the only one I plan to ever go on! YOU GUYS SPOILED ME!! Thanks a lot! I went blindly and unprepared to another forum and got my ass handed to me. I love you guys! Can't stop thanking you. 

So they have this rep system on that other forum. I told ChrisH... Don't ever do that on here! It's nothing but a popularity contest for the frequents, and bragging rights and abuse of power over the newbies. 

xoxo =)


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## voivod (Aug 7, 2008)

city-data???


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## bhappy3 (Feb 4, 2008)

voivod said:


> city-data???


I'm sorry, what?


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## Peridot (Dec 30, 2008)

Apparently, City-Data Forums have a bad reputation for out of control moderators and newbie bashing... however I've never seen any problems there. Maybe I don't visit the controversial forums there...


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## bhappy3 (Feb 4, 2008)

nope, not a city data forum. I never heard of that. Just a parenting forum that came up when I googled parenting forum. Doesn't matter, I'm done there and staying here for good!! You guys are nice (or maybe just tolerable of me)! =)


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## justean (May 28, 2008)

i think this forum is a god send to alot of ppl, including myself.
ok i have my moments like the rest, but you wil stil get honest and genuine answers . ok maybe to honest from me ooppppppSSSSSSSSSS


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