# Happy but depressed



## JupitersLament (May 30, 2011)

My wife and I have been apart now for almost 9 months I think. We separated for a number of reasons, but lately I've been missing my friend. We still talk and things have settled down. 

Neither of has any physical interest in the other, we talk about the kids and that sort of thing. But she was my best friend for nearly 10 years (married 6 together for 4) and I missing having my friend to talk to. I think the hardest part has been losing my friend, I know she feels the same. Both of us are so much happier than before, ours was a marriage of convenience more than anything else.

I have no desire at all to be with her again, but I just miss my friend. It is really giving my depression, I've been seeking professional help and been talking about it.

Sorry I don't even know why I bothered posting this.


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## Freak On a Leash (Feb 19, 2010)

Well, I feel the same. My best friend was my husband. A year ago we seemed to be doing well and now we've lived apart for 7 months and he has no interest in me physically or emotionally. He wants to be "just friends" and I find that impossible because I still love him and want to find a way to make our marriage work..but you can't only have one side that feels that way so now I'm trying to emotionally separate, which is the hardest thing to do I've found. 

But as much as I know I need to do this I feel the same as you do..I miss my friend. He's not the same person who I considered my friend for the past 30 years. It's tough to accept. 

So I'm trying to put together a new life with new friends but it still hurts. 

Good luck to you. I know how you feel.


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## Sparkles422 (Jun 3, 2011)

I am not ready for the friendship without love part yet. My stbxh replaced our close relationship with his sister and an old high school chum. I didn't stand a chance.

With all of the confusion and pain in his eyes and his inability to deal with his feelings, I don't think friendship is a goal at this point. Besides, his confusion and pride led him to do things that created mistrust. I like to trust my friends.

So that's that.


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## caughtdreaming (May 30, 2011)

I can sympathize. 
It really is true what they say, it's like a death. 
My best friend has died.
I miss that friend terribly.
Really depressing.


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## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

I too miss the companionship. I'm sure she does too, and is possibly resentful that I am taking that away from her, but she is the one who chose to leave and try to replace our intimacy with someone new. Like Sparkles, I need to have trust in my friends, and moreso I need a wife who can confide in me - if she wants to give that up I have to set her free back to the wild, no looking back I'm sad to say.


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