# How Do I Increase Sexual Sensitivity



## RunFromYourWife (Feb 14, 2013)

It may sound odd, but I want to increase my sensitivity down there to be able to climax sooner. I have no problem getting it up and staying up, but it can take nearly a hour or longer to actually climax. 

Any suggestions? Don't really care for topical creams and such, but open to just about anything...


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## IrishGirlVA (Aug 27, 2012)

RunFromYourWife said:


> but it can take nearly a hour or longer to actually climax.


Oh behalf of (almost) all women out there --- 

*OUCH! *


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## RunFromYourWife (Feb 14, 2013)

IrishGirlVA said:


> Oh behalf of (almost) all women out there ---
> 
> *OUCH! *


LOL...thanks for the empathy. The silver lining in it all is my wife always gets hers first, usually more than once...

I just feel bad sometimes because sometimes I know it bites at her ego a bit that I am not easily satisfied by her. I think the fastest I've been able to get off is 30 minutes. I know because now she times it...


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## dallasapple (Jun 20, 2012)

YIKES...yeah it doesn't matter if she gets hers first(or more than once) that long will rub you raw.that's why she is timing it LOL!

Hate to say it but have you tried having sex less often?Or does this happen every time no matter how long its been?How often do you have sex?


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## RunFromYourWife (Feb 14, 2013)

dallasapple said:


> YIKES...yeah it doesn't matter if she gets hers first(or more than once) that long will rub you raw.that's why she is timing it LOL!
> 
> Hate to say it but have you tried having sex less often?Or does this happen every time no matter how long its been?How often do you have sex?


I wish we did everyday, but typically 1 or 2 times a week. We can go a week and it will be the same result. I hate to say it but she is the only person I've had this problem with....


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## dallasapple (Jun 20, 2012)

RunFromYourWife said:


> I wish we did everyday, but typically 1 or 2 times a week. We can go a week and it will be the same result. I hate to say it but she is the only person I've had this problem with....


Hmmm..then its probably not an issue with "sensitivity" then in groin area but maybe something more to do with whats happening between the ears ?Are you "in the moment" with her during sex or does your mind 'wander"..about other things???


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## dallasapple (Jun 20, 2012)

RunFromYourWife said:


> I wish we did everyday, but typically 1 or 2 times a week. We can go a week and it will be the same result. I hate to say it but she is the only person I've had this problem with....


In your case if you did it everyday your wife wouldn't be able to sit down without a special seat cushion.(permanently)she probably needs a day or 2 as it is to get over the last time to be able to go 2 times a week.


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## RunFromYourWife (Feb 14, 2013)

dallasapple said:


> Hmmm..then its probably not an issue with "sensitivity" then in groin area but maybe something more to do with whats happening between the ears ?Are you "in the moment" with her during sex or does your mind 'wander"..about other things???


Uhm...I think I am "in the moment". I will really want it, and I find her very attractive. We get into it but sometimes it just takes alot of time it seems...


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## RunFromYourWife (Feb 14, 2013)

There isn't a pill I can take or something?


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## dallasapple (Jun 20, 2012)

RunFromYourWife said:


> There isn't a pill I can take or something?


Uhh...haven't heard of one.You could ask a doctor.Only reason I mentioned it might me "in between the ears" is its only your wife you have this problem with.And the only reason its even a problem is you aren't happy with it sounds like she isn't either?And 1-2 times a week sex "shouldnt" lower your sensitivity to that extreme.I could see if you were having sex once or twice a day and eventually it took "too long" in your opinion and hers.And to be frank an hour sometimes more is a long time.Especially if you are talking about PIV thrusting much of that time.


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## ATC529R (Oct 31, 2012)

have her tell you no.

amazingly when I have to work for it I get much more aroused.


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## dallasapple (Jun 20, 2012)

RunFromYourWife said:


> There isn't a pill I can take or something?


Go have a workup..a male horomone evaluation.The only time I hear of problems with that is mostly guys losing interest in sex or not being able to obtain and keep an erection .Thats not your problem though..I do know (have heard) some guys can have issues orgasming.I would recommend ruling out its physical 1st.It could also be its "your normal" and nothing is "wrong" at all.Or it could be psychological because you are only this way with your wife.


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## dallasapple (Jun 20, 2012)

ATC529R said:


> have her tell you no.
> 
> amazingly when I have to work for it I get much more aroused.


Yeah sometimes "too easy" is a turn off..or lets say not quite as exciting or not for long anyway.


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## chillymorn (Aug 11, 2010)

quit watching porn and masterbating. if you do it in the first place.


or maybe you don't really love her and thats why it takes soooooo long.

I know when I'm pi$$ed it can take forever and sometimes I can't complete to deal.....orgasm.


or try the other hole its tighter.....LOL


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## A Bit Much (Sep 14, 2011)

Try several new positions. One good position is her lying on her belly legs closed, and you lying on top of her. If you aren't particularly heavy it's not uncomfortable for either of you, and the friction is amazing.

Or as chilly suggested... go to the other hole. LOL


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## dallasapple (Jun 20, 2012)

> I know when I'm pi$$ed it can take forever and sometimes I can't complete to deal.....orgasm.


I was wondering (as a possiblilty) if he is angry at her.(resentments)..that can "block" sensitivity..Of course I'm a female but if I'm pissed or feeling resentful? I CANT..UNLESS I figure out a way to get that out of my HEAD and only focus on the moment.Which is next near impossible to do depending on how pissed or resentful I'm feeling.


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## dallasapple (Jun 20, 2012)

> quit watching porn and masterbating. if you do it in the first place.


I 2nd that..IF you engage in that activity.

I asked you how many times you have sex or how often.That includes masturbating with or without porn.


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## dallasapple (Jun 20, 2012)

So the bottom line is LOL!! If you are completely abstaining (including masturbation) but for sex with your wife once or twice a week..you aren't angry with her you love her and find her attractive too..taking over an hour (try as you might) to be able to orgasm puts you in the "rare and unusual category)..assuming you are healthy hormonal wise.


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## RunFromYourWife (Feb 14, 2013)

A Bit Much said:


> Try several new positions. One good position is her lying on her belly legs closed, and you lying on top of her. If you aren't particularly heavy it's not uncomfortable for either of you, and the friction is amazing.


Yeah, I love that position...LOL.


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## A Bit Much (Sep 14, 2011)

Just thought of another thing you could do...

Pull out every few strokes. Catch some air down there to dry things up a bit, then continue. 

And yes, if you're masturbating and watching porn, stop. It does mess with you mentally when it comes to the real thing.


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## RunFromYourWife (Feb 14, 2013)

dallasapple said:


> I was wondering (as a possiblilty) if he is angry at her.(resentments)..that can "block" sensitivity..Of course I'm a female but if I'm pissed or feeling resentful? I CANT..UNLESS I figure out a way to get that out of my HEAD and only focus on the moment.Which is next near impossible to do depending on how pissed or resentful I'm feeling.


I am not angry with her...at least not when I want some nooky...LOL...


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## RunFromYourWife (Feb 14, 2013)

dallasapple said:


> I 2nd that..IF you engage in that activity.
> 
> I asked you how many times you have sex or how often.That includes masturbating with or without porn.


We have sex maybe 1 or 2 times a week. Masturbating isn't something I like to do so I haven't quite paid attention to that. It could possibly have some baring, sometimes, but in general not really.


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## dallasapple (Jun 20, 2012)

RunFromYourWife said:


> We have sex maybe 1 or 2 times a week. Masturbating isn't something I like to do so I haven't quite paid attention to that. It could possibly have some baring, sometimes, but in general not really.


well for now stop it..see if it helps at all.What about porn?Do you use porn when you do that?


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## dallasapple (Jun 20, 2012)

A Bit Much said:


> Just thought of another thing you could do...
> 
> Pull out every few strokes. Catch some air down there to dry things up a bit, then continue.
> 
> And yes, if you're masturbating and watching porn, stop. It does mess with you mentally when it comes to the real thing.


The pulling out every few strokes is what you do to make it last LONGER!Not to speed it up.


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## dallasapple (Jun 20, 2012)

Oh and as far as the butt hole part? I'm sure even if that cut the time in "half" she would still and most likely even more so be "timing it" and need a special cushion to sit on for a few days.


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## A Bit Much (Sep 14, 2011)

dallasapple said:


> The pulling out every few strokes is what you do to make it last LONGER!Not to speed it up.


Not in our case. It's perfect for increasing friction. Not to mention it looks really HOT.


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## RunFromYourWife (Feb 14, 2013)

dallasapple said:


> well for now stop it..see if it helps at all.What about porn?Do you use porn when you do that?


Oh yeah!


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## RunFromYourWife (Feb 14, 2013)

A Bit Much said:


> Just thought of another thing you could do...
> 
> Pull out every few strokes. Catch some air down there to dry things up a bit, then continue.
> 
> And yes, if you're masturbating and watching porn, stop. It does mess with you mentally when it comes to the real thing.


Might that become uncomfortable for *her* if it dries her out as well?


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## inarut (Feb 9, 2013)

I don't get it. Lasting longer is a good thing in my book. You said she is getting hers several times...another good thing in my book. Is this bothering her or you? Are you the one who wants it over fast? Is it that you are bored and not really into it and that is why you want to cum faster? Is that the real problem?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## RunFromYourWife (Feb 14, 2013)

inarut said:


> I don't get it. Lasting longer is a good thing in my book. You said she is getting hers several times...another good thing in my book. Is this bothering her or you? Are you the one who wants it over fast? Is it that you are bored and not really into it and that is why you want to cum faster? Is that the real problem?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


After a while, SHE wants it to be over. Sometimes even after having an orgasm multiple times she is just getting worn out, understandably. We've even tried things I really like such as oral sex and that can still take a long time (to her). After maybe the first 10-20 minutes she is unlikely to climax again. She is then just waiting it out for me to get mine. Maybe I just have my head too much in the movies (hollywood, porno, LOL) where both people tend to climax around the same time. That happens sometimes, but usually she gets hers then waits several minutes (10-20) for me to finally skeet one out...


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## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

You probably have a mental block.
Your penis is functioning fine because your erection is fine.
But you are not mentally aroused, so you find it hard to let yourself go when your penis gives your brain that signal.

Something is blocking it mentally.


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## Idun (Jul 30, 2011)

google prostate stimulation/massage for men for enhanced pleasure. I've read some amazing things (for men - earth shattering orgasms more similar to the one women get! ).


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## dallasapple (Jun 20, 2012)

inarut said:


> I don't get it. Lasting longer is a good thing in my book. You said she is getting hers several times...another good thing in my book. Is this bothering her or you? Are you the one who wants it over fast? Is it that you are bored and not really into it and that is why you want to cum faster? Is that the real problem?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


No its not.Or lets say lasting longer than what?Getting hers I think he said "sometimes more than once:..doesn't mean lasting longer (after that) is any more fun than a guy who "gets his" and she wont give it up.It reaches a point all you want is to sleep ..or hell you are thinking about what you want to eat.really the only bad thing about lasting if its not LONG enough for her to get hers..lasting a lot longer after the fact is NOT a good thing.Not the mention the "area" is sensitive and it can be down right irritating for it to go ON and ON being fiddled with.Trust me .


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## dallasapple (Jun 20, 2012)

Idun said:


> google prostate stimulation/massage for men for enhanced pleasure. I've read some amazing things (for men - earth shattering orgasms more similar to the one women get! ).


How would you know what a womans orgasm is like in comparison to a mans if you aren't a woman (or vice versa?) I highly doubt they are that far apart /Mens most common complaint is they want more.typically hers isn't ..So if anything maybe his is more "earth shattering" than hers?Even if you got an anal probe(prostate massage) and had a better orgasm..you still couldn't say that is closer to a woman's because she doesn't HAVE a prostate and you don't have a vagina and uterus.So how could you say its "closer to a womans orgasm"?Women just make a lot more noise typically during orgasm.I think thats part of the confusion..


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## A Bit Much (Sep 14, 2011)

RunFromYourWife said:


> Might that become uncomfortable for *her* if it dries her out as well?


Well it hasn't happened to me, can't speak for her though. 

Too much lubrication reduces friction, and pulling out once in a while is a bit more convenient than wiping yourself off every minute or so. 

Also, it's got a lot to do with your thoughts while having sex. What you think about can cause things to take a really long time.


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## dallasapple (Jun 20, 2012)

> Also, it's got a lot to do with your thoughts while having sex. What you think about can cause things to take a really long time.


Exactly that why I asked him what is going on between his ears especially because he said he never had this problem with any other woman hes been with.


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## RunFromYourWife (Feb 14, 2013)

dallasapple said:


> Exactly that why I asked him what is going on between his ears especially because he said he never had this problem with any other woman hes been with.


Perhaps...we have had some difficult times...


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## dallasapple (Jun 20, 2012)

RunFromYourWife said:


> Perhaps...we have had some difficult times...


All I know is for me? I have to keep focussed .If for some reason I cant including if I'm angry at him or we are having "too much sex" and its taking a while thoughts eventually are only about me taking too long ..thoughts like its just not going to happen.. what I could only describe as 'performance pressure" like a form of anxiety about taking too long or not being able to .even guilt....when to just say "I cant" IOW stop trying(call it quits)..which I know makes him on some level dissapointed either of himself or me or both.

I know what goes on in the mind is pretty crucial for many .I'm one of those women that has fairly regular nocturnal orgasms while I'm sleeping from a sexual DREAM.Where I am not being physically touched at all.They wake me up.No different than some who may wake up crying because they had a sad dream ..or laughing out loud because they had a funny dream..or screaming because they had a frightning dream.I wake up orgasaming because I dream I'm having sex.Or more frustrating is I wake up RIGHT before like that Limbo" time before you go over the edge and I have to relieve myself.

That's why I get kind of aggravated when men say "women just don't understand what a guy goes through"..Well maybe i don't understand litterally/ excactly identically because I'm not a man but I understand in a parrallel way as a female.Or when men "assume" things about that (or women) that makes us soooo completely opposite.And not just with sex.


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## IrishGirlVA (Aug 27, 2012)

You know, I definitely agree with dallasapple that there might be something going on between the ears. Could be negative thoughts (I can't believe she didn't fold my shirt right!), could be positive thoughts (I hope I satisfy her) to mundane thoughts (is garbage day tomorrow or Wednesday?). 

I'm single again. Bought fresh batteries and spending more time with my ol' pal, Dolphie. When I am really into it and focusing on the good feelings my visit with Dolphie is relatively short. But the minute I start thinking about the dust hanging off my bedroom ceiling fan I become unfocused and Dophie overstays her welcome. 

Does your wife dirty talk during sex? Does she engage enough to keep you engaged? Keep you focused? 

I dated a guy once that had unbelievable control over his orgasms. God I miss him. But if there was ever a time when it went on a little too long for my 'lil IrishGirlVA's liking all I had to do was whisper something in his ear and......


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## dallasapple (Jun 20, 2012)

IrishGirlVA said:


> You know, I definitely agree with dallasapple that there might be something going on between the ears. Could be negative thoughts (I can't believe she didn't fold my shirt right!), could be positive thoughts (I hope I satisfy her) to mundane thoughts (is garbage day tomorrow or Wednesday?).
> 
> I'm single again. Bought fresh batteries and spending more time with my ol' pal, Dolphie. When I am really into it and focusing on the good feelings my visit with Dolphie is relatively short. But the minute I start thinking about the dust hanging off my bedroom ceiling fan I become unfocused and Dophie overstays her welcome.
> 
> ...


Exactly.."in the mind " only thoughts (like the grocery list) but even external distractions that "take your mind away" like your ceiling fan having dust on it..the mind NEEDS to be present/and or involved with the "right thoughts" going on or the mind will "get in the way".I remember one time we were ..ya know LOL ..and it was afternoon sometime and some neighbors were outside talking and loud enough I could hear their whole conversation ..Ya know like HEY RICHARD HOWS IT GOING???FINE BOB how is SUE doing after that SURGERY!!! (and I'm thinking wonder why Sue had surgery????) OH BY THE WAY I CAME BY TO SEE IF I COULD BORROW YOUR MOWER!!!!! SURE BOB NO PROBLEM I KNOW HOW THAT IS ! HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!


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## Idun (Jul 30, 2011)

Dallasapple said:


> How would you know what a womans orgasm is like in comparison to a mans if you aren't a woman (or vice versa?) I highly doubt they are that far apart /Mens most common complaint is they want more.typically hers isn't ..So if anything maybe his is more "earth shattering" than hers?Even if you got an anal probe(prostate massage) and had a better orgasm..you still couldn't say that is closer to a woman's because she doesn't HAVE a prostate and you don't have a vagina and uterus.So how could you say its "closer to a womans orgasm"?Women just make a lot more noise typically during orgasm.I think thats part of the confusion..


Never said that I know 

But reading about orgasms, the female one can be way stronger that a mans. And - "Female orgasm lethal to men"... really? 

Zemore.com | Female Orgasm Lethal to Men

Further research needed maybe? But very interesting data.

I had a really strong orgasm a few months ago, actually lost my hearing for about 10 seconds. That's never happened before (i'm female).

On prostate

Wiki


> In both sexes, pleasure can be derived from the nerve endings around the anus and the anus itself, such as during anal sex. It is possible for men to achieve an orgasm through prostate stimulation alone.[2][19] The prostate is located next to the rectum and is the larger, more developed[81] male homologue to the Skene's glands (which are believed to be connected to the female G-Spot).[82] Prostate stimulation can produce a "deeper" orgasm, described by some men as more widespread and intense, longer-lasting, and allowing for greater feelings of ecstasy than orgasm elicited by penile stimulation only.


How does male prostate orgasm feel (this guy reckons) How does male anal orgasm feel

I want to try it on my husband, because I know he likes pressure on it from the outside and I can feel how much more it winds him up.

Would love to give him this It Won't Stop - The Epic Prostate Orgasm - Life on the Swingset


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## LouAnn Poovy (Mar 21, 2013)

*You've never had this problem with anyone but your wife you said. How old are you and how long have you been only with your wife? Can you climax quickly with masturbation & porn?*


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