# problems with mil



## mpixies (Feb 25, 2015)

hi, i'm a young mum and a young wife. I've just married for less than a year and i got married becos i was pregnant. throughout the whole pregnancy i was struggling and having a lot of problems with my husband and his parents.

First when I just got pregnant, his mum ask me to abort and as if the baby was his. though my parents and his parents sat down and talk about the wedding, but it ended up with a terrible decision which the mum make. At first they said that the wedding will be on the march but his parents said that it was too rush. second was on May but his parents said that by that time my tummy will be very big. so we decided to host it after my birth.at that period of time i was been left unattended by my husband, while i was bleeding he just left me and continue doing his stuff. his parents did not even say anything abt it. 
oh i hold my rom on May, when i was 5 months pregnant. I wanted to hold my rom at my cousin place for my conveniences but again his dad was not happy about it and told my husband that if its not held at their house they wont sign the paper. and my parents was like okie fine, everything shun them....
not just that we have to rent my cousin room just becos his parents doesnt allow him to come my house stay and i moved in around march staying there alone first after may my husband will move in. apon reaching may, his parents said that they did not said that so my husband cant move in as they said that it was say becos they tot we will be married on the march/may. And they just say after i give birth then my husband move in tgt with me. i feel so fu*k up. what does they mean? first they doesnt allow me to wear wedding gown and no wedding car... i got so pissed off and had a fight with my husband... 

during my pregnancy, i cried everyday having nightmare everyday. It was so terrible that i even tot of committing suicide twices. we quarrelled his parents a lot of time and also about my cousin... i feel so much insecure and stress. :'(
sign... 

after birth it got worse... i got myself into depression due to his parents and him. that was where the big fight occur....
during the period i moved back home to stay as me and my husband had a really really big fight. it was somehow one of the worse fight ever.... 
after few days of stay at home my husband came up to my house and wanted to carry the baby away from me. he quarrel with my parents ended up his parents came to my house. i swear that talk doesnt even sound like a talk... his mum was pointing her finger against my parents and me while i was there shivering and sheer with tears. i couldnt control my emotions...

ive visit my doctor tgt with my husband for counselling.As the doctor said that nothing is wrong with me i just need some counselling. after a few session tgt with my husband,our relationship improved. and just to share one of the problems is that my husband want to let his mum tc of the baby which i dont wish to. as his mum went to get prams, baby cot and car seats... my husband just got heart pain for wht his mum did so we had a quarrel about it.
after sharing our problems with my counsellor, it came to a point where i decided to let his parents see my baby once a week. but then, when my husband told his mum, she got so pissed off and send me this msg: 

"hi, im v disappointed that u have such a bad feeling against me, i wonder did i do any thing wrong to u, yes you are baby mother but u have to knw that im your husband mother that cant be change. with this kind of situation and your attitude no point of me attending your tea ceremony i will cancel it and i wont take care of the baby.''

my reply to her:
"hi aunty, sorry for late reply. first of all i wan to apologise to u that had happended throughout these few weeks. i really not in a v gd condition as im having diffculty communicating with ur son and even my family members. i just want you to know i nv ment to create so many trouble cos ive just give birth but however i feel slightly better now. not that i dont want you to see ur grandson but i ard promise my aunt to tc. however be sure that every week sean will come back with baby once every week to play with you. i hope u have a kind heart forgive me. i do sincerely both me and sean and both our families can stay harmony. and i hope that you will attend the tea ceremony as i respect u as sean mum and my mil."

And guess what, the mum just cancelled the tea ceremony two weeks before the wedding not just that they did not even hold any wedding for me. my parents are the one doing it for me. all they want is to have the tea ceremony and they just want me to be happy...

now his mum just want the grandson but doesnt accept me. up till now i did not visit his parents for cny and same goes to my baby. 
and my husband always quarrel with me about this issue... 
not just that we had a lot of issues...

i hope that you'll could give me an advices about it...


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## EnjoliWoman (Jul 2, 2012)

Oh my gosh. Babies having babies. Having babies before you are married. You aren't mature enough to manage your relationships with family and you were using the child to get back at your mother in law. And stop texting to solve problems! Call her or talk to her in person! Of course she doesn't want to host any ceremony for you - you've been acting like a child. Time to grow up. Ceremonies are worthless. Get a job, you and husband get your own place and start behaving like adults.


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## frusdil (Sep 5, 2013)

How old are you and your husband OP?


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