# Men dancing



## ntamph (Apr 23, 2013)

I, like the majority of American men, don't like to dance or know how to dance.

Women are usually better dancers. It's considered to be feminine and real men don't dance. My dad (in his 60's) dances and the men of his generation usually aren't afraid to dance. 

I notice that in clubs it's usually mostly women on the floor with men on the sides. I wonder if they would appreciate male company.

I was thinking about taking dancing lessons in a group kind of thing but I'm not sure. I think that I would never get good at it.

Men: is dancing (by men) feminine to you?
Women: how do you look at men who can dance?


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

ntamph said:


> I, like the majority of American men, don't like to dance or know how to dance.
> 
> Women are usually better dancers. It's considered to be feminine and real men don't dance. My dad (in his 60's) dances and the men of his generation usually aren't afraid to dance.
> 
> ...


In many Latino and African and Carribean cultures, men dance as machisimo. So they dance with women, AS MEN. They dance and it is desireable.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

I did so in my formitive and college years, but now will only waltz during special occasions. 

As a rule however, women seem to be far more into it than their male counterparts!


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## Wiserforit (Dec 27, 2012)

A man should be able to bust out some moves.

Show he isn't afraid to get down in front of others.


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## tm84 (Jul 24, 2011)

Male, 48, and yeah, I dance whenever I feel like it. Give me some good deep house music and that's it. My club days are over, but me and friends of mine were and are not shy on the dance floor. A group of us would go out, dance and wouldn't stop until closing time. 

Dancing is seen as "unmanly"? No man has any reason to not dance unless he's dead.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Majority of American men? Lol. I know tons of American men who LOVE to dance. They are of Latino decent but still American  

My husband is a dancer. A good dancer too.

Me, being a white girl, cannot dance-- or so I've been told. I dunno though, I have some serious moves 

I don't think it's feminine for men to dance. We should all be like children and just love life.


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## kokonatsu (Feb 22, 2013)

I *love* men who can dance. always been most attracted to those kinds of guys. lucky my man is quite a good dancer!!


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## Dahlia92 (Dec 31, 2012)

I love to go dancing. My husband will reluctantly humor me on occasion, but I wish he was more open to it. 

I don't find a man who dances feminine at all. I think it's a very attractive quality.


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## sparkyjim (Sep 22, 2012)

*"I, like the majority of American men, don't like to dance or know how to dance."*


I think that this is not necessarily true...

But what is true is that we both grew up in a stagnated male culture that says "I don't want to stick my neck out and possibly embarrass myself, especially in regards to women..."

So we grunt and we play football and we wonder why our women have no passion for us.

I started taking dance classes a while ago. I did it because I have always wanted to dance. I was always a little envious of the couples on the dance floor who seemed to be having so much fun together. It's fun and I meet all kinds of people. It also makes a person more confident and here is where we differ....it is MANLY to dance. When you couple dance you are the leader. The woman takes her cues from you. You lead, you decide, and trust me - it carries over into the relationship.

If nothing else having confidence in another area of life is fulfilling.


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## unbelievable (Aug 20, 2010)

I've been a Soldier and a cop for over 31 years. I took ballroom dancing classes years ago with my wife. Never occurred to me that it was feminine for a man to dance with a woman. It's good exercise, it's good bonding time, it's a nice excuse to get all spiffed up and it's not a bad way to get laid. Learning new things is rarely a bad idea.


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## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

treyvion said:


> In many Latino and African and Carribean cultures, men dance as machisimo. So they dance with women, AS MEN. They dance and it is desireable.


This is how we do it.

R. Kelly - Step In The Name Of Love - YouTube


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## Goldmember357 (Jan 31, 2012)

Yes I notice most men cannot dance at all and show no desire to learn (such a shame). Your game goes up 10 points at least if you can dance well.

With that said. Very few women are better dancers than me, and I don't even have that much experience.


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

ntamph said:


> I, like the majority of American men, don't like to dance or know how to dance.
> 
> Women are usually better dancers. It's considered to be feminine and real men don't dance. My dad (in his 60's) dances and the men of his generation usually aren't afraid to dance.
> 
> ...


Men who dance get more women. That is NOT feminine. 

Any guy who refuses to take his woman dancing and would rather she go and dance with other guys is a complete fool.


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## justdance4me (Jul 12, 2013)

ntamph said:


> I, like the majority of American men, don't like to dance or know how to dance.
> 
> Women are usually better dancers. It's considered to be feminine and real men don't dance. My dad (in his 60's) dances and the men of his generation usually aren't afraid to dance.
> 
> ...


WOW!! Sorry I am late to join this conversation. I am a professional dancer and teacher (female) in a contemporary dance company consisting of 6 males and 4 females. Our artistic director is a male, many of our guest choreographers and artists are male.

There is NOTHING feminine about men dancing, its athletic, it builds flexibility, endurance, muscle tone, etc. The work that some of my male colleagues do is amazing and they have bodies to die for. When not in the studio they are in the gym. We train typically 10 hours a day and do 4-5 programs a year. 

As for dancing in clubs, last night I was at a club and a lot of men were dancing. However, self confidence is generally a factor in terms of why they don't dance. 

I encourage you to take dance classes. Where are you located? I can recommend a great studio for you (this is open to anyone interested in learning).


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

I wish I could dance (speaking as a guy). I just feel really self-conscious, unless I drink a lot. . Then I suspect my dancing doesn't get better, but I care less. 

I would like to take dancing lessons with my SO, but we haven't made it a priority yet. Maybe this winter... She likes watching "Dancing With The Stars" and does tap dancing with a group that competes, so I'm a bit disadvantaged. Well, a LOT disadvantaged! 

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ntamph (Apr 23, 2013)

PBear said:


> I wish I could dance (speaking as a guy). I just feel really self-conscious
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I relate to this. I can intellectually understand why learning to dance would be good for me. But, I've had bad experiences (being laughed at at school dances). I want to have the fun that other people are having but this desire is always overshadowed by the conviction that everyone (especially women) would laugh at me.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Dancing is not feminine. 

Men who dance, really dance, not just get up a wiggle a bit to music, are sexy. 

If you want to meet women, take dance classes. There are usually a lot more women there than men.


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## Wiserforit (Dec 27, 2012)

ntamph said:


> I relate to this. I can intellectually understand why learning to dance would be good for me. But, I've had bad experiences (being laughed at at school dances). I want to have the fun that other people are having but this desire is always overshadowed by the conviction that everyone (especially women) would laugh at me.


Super Beta traits: fear of being laughed at. Quitting.


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## ntamph (Apr 23, 2013)

Wiserforit said:


> Super Beta traits: fear of being laughed at. Quitting.


It's not an imaginary fear. It's happened to me before.


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

waiwera said:


> ntamph - me and hubby take 'Ceroc' lessons most weeks (we wanted to be able to dance together...like grown ups!)
> 
> You don't dance with your own partner even if you arrive together and if there aren't enough men...some of the women have to play that part.
> 
> ...


You hit on the yin and yang of it. You like danicng with your hubby ... yet in class you are not allowed. LOL. I get that to a certain point from a learning perspective. And Ceroc dancing is not such a big deal. Very fun though.

However, you mention that many of the women are hoping to meet guys. Some guys feel the same way. Agenda may or may not be different here. But close enough. Some couples just like to flirt with other couples. Whatever. Again Ceroc seems ok. Couples attending together should be fine as well. But if one or the other goes more often than the other one might get a little concerned when the dancing is something more intimate. Many folks can handle that. But dancing if done right is sensual ( or is it sensuous ... LOL ). It would also become an issue if people start FB each other and taking the actibities to the club. I know you are not saying anything like this.

So in principle I think this is awesome. I would make sure that both partners are comfortable with the rules of engagement and that proper boundaries are in place first. Again this beats the heck out of one partner hitting the clubs alone.

But danicng is fun and a way to bond. It is for sure one thing ... Foreplay. And great exercise for your body and your soul. It is good for you.


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## hambone (Mar 30, 2013)

ntamph said:


> I, like the majority of American men, don't like to dance or know how to dance.
> 
> Women are usually better dancers. It's considered to be feminine and real men don't dance. My dad (in his 60's) dances and the men of his generation usually aren't afraid to dance.
> 
> ...


I LOVE to dance... And, I'm very good at it. (I've had many women ask my wife if I was as good horizontally as I am vertically! She says I am.) When I want to, I can put on a show... Do what I call the "Stallion", make that stallion gallop, the Chippendale chug etc. 

I"m getting old.. too fat and slow, can't move my feet like I use to. 

A guy who LIKES to dance... and is good at it... man, you are the hit of the party. 

At dances, there are no shortage of women who want to "borrow" me.


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

EleGirl said:


> Dancing is not feminine.
> 
> Men who dance, really dance, not just get up a wiggle a bit to music, are sexy.
> 
> If you want to meet women, take dance classes. There are usually a lot more women there than men.


Pure Gold!!!!

Add this statement to the book for men who want to meet women!!! Dance for God's sake.

The comment earlier about confidence is critical as well.

Indeed women love confident men. I speak as a man here of course. How do I know this attracts women? If I am anything I am confident. With the right amount of humble thrown in when they get to know me. BUT, confidence trumps so much else. I knwo this to be true. No matter whether women are even conscious about it. Confidence will get them focusing on your good points and not your bad. You will have the it factor.

Ok so this is a chick song. LOL. But please take it both literally and metphorically. I hope you dance.

Lee Ann Womack - I Hope You Dance - YouTube

Life is too freaking short my friend. Freaking Dance Buddy. Go get it. She wants it.

Look I am a white belt in all things in life. But I do not let it stop me.


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## larry.gray (Feb 21, 2011)

I'm white enough to suck at dancing.

I'm also ethnic enough to suck at bowling


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

Dancing Men

Women Dancing


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

larry.gray said:


> I'm white enough to suck at dancing.
> 
> I'm also ethnic enough to suck at bowling


I have enjoyed many hours with women doing both of these.  Yes, .... even bowling. Seriously. Oh yeah this brings back some great memories.

Many women look awesome approaching the lane. No matter where the ball goes. They are always smiling too. Dance ... Bowl ... whatever. Get out there with your mate. if you are single, get out there. Lose the FEAR.


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## Wiserforit (Dec 27, 2012)

ntamph said:


> It's not an imaginary fear. It's happened to me before.


So? This fear is beta by definition. People laugh at me all the time, and I generally laugh with them. 

It proves you don't even have the self-confidence to believe practice will improve you. 

Same thing with musical instruments, singing, etc. My college room-mate laughed at me when I brought my first guitar home. 

Take a guess - did I quit, or did I end up playing bands for years as lead singer and guitarist? Same thing there too - it was a lock on girls being an entertainer.


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## Coffee Amore (Dec 15, 2011)

My husband is a great dancer. Far better than I am. He can even do the waltz, foxtrot and other classic dances whereas I would just step on someone's feet. 

I've never thought dancing was exclusively feminine. Where I live a lot of heterosexual men take a particular type of dance class, which is popular in the culture here.


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

waiwera said:


> Hi Entrophy - must admit I had just assumed I would dance with hubby at the lessons and i wasn't sure i was going to like the whole concept, but many folk come to class unpartnered and I have also come to enjoy dancing with the better more experienced dancers... less of the blind leading the blind kind of thing.
> Hubby and i practice together during the week. Beats watching TV any night. We also take any opportunity to dance together when we are out socialising.
> 
> We do have boundaries and rules of engagement...we only ever go together. and are very open and transparent about emails, texts etc and we share our FB page. As far as I know we have a faithful marriage.
> ...


Yup. I was just doing my over analytical thing I always do. The fact you made me think is all good.
I tend to look at things for the yin and yang. It helps me understand the "playing field". It keeps me from being blindsided.


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## ntamph (Apr 23, 2013)

I've been looking around and lessons are expensive generally. I wish there were something free. 

I realize that this could really help with my confidence. I just have to find the right group and force myself to do it.


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## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

ntamph said:


> I've been looking around and lessons are expensive generally. I wish there were something free.
> 
> I realize that this could really help with my confidence. I just have to find the right group and force myself to do it.


There are free tutorials on youtube for any type of dance.


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