# Painful sex



## Ants (Sep 12, 2020)

was curious if anyone else has this issue in there marriage... how they have managed or adapted...wife and I are in our forties and she has come down with bad reactive arthritis. Trying meds but none are working. Makes sex painful for her as the inflammation is in her hip joints As well as other places. Hurts to hold her legs up and when I would grind or pound into her. Missionary is out and so is doggy. Spooning seems ok. Any ideas on positions that might help or if anyone else is in this position? How did you adapt? Thanks


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

My guess is even spreading her legs apart is also painful. Spooning is probably your best option or face to face on her side. I'm sure her knees are shot too. she may get to where she can't even bend her knees very far. You might try standing up behind her with her bent over the back of a chair or couch. But whether she can get off supporting her own weight will just depend on her own particular circumstance. 

It's a sad fact that there just is no cure for arthritis. Maybe sometime in the future she will feel she needs to get hip or knee replacement. She's just fragile and that's just the way it is. Sorry.


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## bobert (Nov 22, 2018)

Ants said:


> was curious if anyone else has this issue in there marriage... how they have managed or adapted...wife and I are in our forties and she has come down with bad reactive arthritis. Trying meds but none are working. Makes sex painful for her as the inflammation is in her hip joints As well as other places. Hurts to hold her legs up and when I would grind or pound into her. Missionary is out and so is doggy. Spooning seems ok. Any ideas on positions that might help or if anyone else is in this position? How did you adapt? Thanks


If spooning is okay, what about you being on your side (like spooning) and her being on her back, on a bit of a diagnol, with her legs over yours (not spread)? Her on her stomach, face down? For doggy, have you tried that with her being more face down, butt up and having pillows or something supportive under her?


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## Mr.Married (Feb 21, 2018)

Man your wife must be hurting. That has to be a horrible condition. Not sure I have any good advice. I’d stick to the spooning if she is comfortable.


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## happyhusband0005 (May 4, 2018)

Ants said:


> was curious if anyone else has this issue in there marriage... how they have managed or adapted...wife and I are in our forties and she has come down with bad reactive arthritis. Trying meds but none are working. Makes sex painful for her as the inflammation is in her hip joints As well as other places. Hurts to hold her legs up and when I would grind or pound into her. Missionary is out and so is doggy. Spooning seems ok. Any ideas on positions that might help or if anyone else is in this position? How did you adapt? Thanks


This might be a little out there but if you live in a state with legal marijuana there is THC infused lube. One of the indicated uses is to help with painful sex. We have used it a few times but just for fun. It makes my wife's more intense and longer lasting. The biggest name is Foria if you want to research the reviews on it. The Foria seems to be only available in CA and CO but most places have companies that make their own versions of it. It has to be applied a half hour to an hour before to work. Be careful with oral after applying it because it wont get the female high but if you ingest a decent amount of it you will.


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## WandaJ (Aug 5, 2014)

Has your wife try to get on the anti-inflammatory diet: no gluten, no dairy, no sugar, corn etc? I know it seems overwhelming, but starting with just going gluten free for few weeks can make a big difference. I don't have arthritis, but different type of inflamation problems - and I had huge improvement after just five days off gluten. That was lucky, usually it takes few weeks. And I've seen it helping others too. It is worth a try, nothing to risk.


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## notmyjamie (Feb 5, 2019)

WandaJ said:


> Has your wife try to get on the anti-inflammatory diet: no gluten, no dairy, no sugar, corn etc? I know it seems overwhelming, but starting with just going gluten free for few weeks can make a big difference. I don't have arthritis, but different type of inflamation problems - and I had huge improvement after just five days off gluten. That was lucky, usually it takes few weeks. And I've seen it helping others too. It is worth a try, nothing to risk.


My mother had great success with elimination gluten from her diet. She had severe arthritis in her neck and when she went gluten free she almost never had pain anymore. If she cheated, she paid the price. It's definitely worth a try!!!


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## Ragnar Ragnasson (Mar 4, 2018)

Sorry you two are going through this. You sound like a concerned spouse which is a great sign that together you'll both find a solution that works.

The suggestions on trying THC in whatever form may work for you. So might straight up trying some cannabis in different forms as a pain reducer and relaxant. 

That helps with pain, without using heavier narcotics or suffering from stomach irritation in not opioid pain meds, and obviously doesn't open the door to long term opioid use which of course is not a good solution for many reasons.

Keep up the good work in solution seeking!


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