# Estranged finally told me,hit hard



## greatgal (9 mo ago)

My estranged husband I left yesterday finally told me and it hit me hard.We met up in a neutral place and told me he cheated on me 5 times during our marriage.I was angry and it hit me hard.Pleaded to me to come back and we can work things out.I told him hell no and not coming back,had enough of his crap.Worst part is he has a kid each with two of the women.Got back in my truck and left.This is the worst I have been through with him.I know better,he would of cheated on me if I came back.


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## BeyondRepair007 (Nov 4, 2021)

greatgal said:


> My estranged husband I left yesterday finally told me and it hit me hard.We met up in a neutral place and told me he cheated on me 5 times during our marriage.I was angry and it hit me hard.Pleaded to me to come back and we can work things out.I told him hell no and not coming back,had enough of his crap.Worst part is he has a kid each with two of the women.Got back in my truck and left.This is the worst I have been through with him.I know better,he would of cheated on me if I came back.


5 times, wow. Hard to believe. And 2 children! Thank your lucky stars you got out of that mess. And yes, he would have cheated again if you came back, you know that.

Im glad you’re away from him now though, and your kids are still doing good with this? When do the divorce papers get served?


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## greatgal (9 mo ago)

BeyondRepair007 said:


> 5 times, wow. Hard to believe. And 2 children! Thank your lucky stars you got out of that mess. And yes, he would have cheated again if you came back, you know that.
> 
> Im glad you’re away from him now though, and your kids are still doing good with this? When do the divorce papers get served?


My kids are from a previous relationship,their dad is in their life.I see my lawyer on Tuesday to file for divorce.I want to do it right.


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## DownByTheRiver (Jul 2, 2020)

greatgal said:


> My estranged husband I left yesterday finally told me and it hit me hard.We met up in a neutral place and told me he cheated on me 5 times during our marriage.I was angry and it hit me hard.Pleaded to me to come back and we can work things out.I told him hell no and not coming back,had enough of his crap.Worst part is he has a kid each with two of the women.Got back in my truck and left.This is the worst I have been through with him.I know better,he would of cheated on me if I came back.


So sorry for you.


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## aine (Feb 15, 2014)

greatgal said:


> My estranged husband I left yesterday finally told me and it hit me hard.We met up in a neutral place and told me he cheated on me 5 times during our marriage.I was angry and it hit me hard.Pleaded to me to come back and we can work things out.I told him hell no and not coming back,had enough of his crap.Worst part is he has a kid each with two of the women.Got back in my truck and left.This is the worst I have been through with him.I know better,he would of cheated on me if I came back.


Why would you go back to that. Let him go! Free yourself of the pain and strife, move forward, get therapy for yourself. Contact a lawyer and divorce him.


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## greatgal (9 mo ago)

aine said:


> Why would you go back to that. Let him go! Free yourself of the pain and strife, move forward, get therapy for yourself. Contact a lawyer and divorce him.


I am seeing a therapist for anxiety and ptsd.I am seeing my lawyer on Tuesday on filing for divorce


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## jlg07 (Feb 24, 2017)

Sorry that your image of him and your history together got so shattered, but the good thing is -- you see it all clearly (yes with pain, but that will lessen). Those rose-colored glasses are TRULY gone (like you needed that anyway, but...).
KNOW that this isn't on YOU -- you did what a good loving spouse should -- trusted and loved him. HE is clearly broken and can't be true to ANY relationship. Just sucks that he has kids to give bad examples to...

Also, for PTSD, see if your therapist uses EMDR (or find one who does) -- was designed for PTSD.


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## Wolfman1968 (Jun 9, 2011)

greatgal said:


> My kids are from a previous relationship,their dad is in their life.I see my lawyer on Tuesday to file for divorce.I want to do it right.


Sounds like you have a clear idea of what you will and will not tolerate. Good for you.


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## greatgal (9 mo ago)

jlg07 said:


> Sorry that your image of him and your history together got so shattered, but the good thing is -- you see it all clearly (yes with pain, but that will lessen). Those rose-colored glasses are TRULY gone (like you needed that anyway, but...).
> KNOW that this isn't on YOU -- you did what a good loving spouse should -- trusted and loved him. HE is clearly broken and can't be true to ANY relationship. Just sucks that he has kids to give bad examples to...
> 
> Also, for PTSD, see if your therapist uses EMDR (or find one who does) -- was designed for PTSD.


My therapist uses EMDR that I am seeing


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## greatgal (9 mo ago)

Wolfman1968 said:


> Sounds like you have a clear idea of what you will and will not tolerate. Good for you.


Was raised right and one is use common sense.Knew the answer is no right away.


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## frusdil (Sep 5, 2013)

God that's terrible! I'm so sorry.

You're absolutely right that he'd do it again.


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## Spoons027 (Jun 19, 2017)

Wow. 5 times and 2 baby mommas? Good job on choosing to get the **** out of dodge on that one.


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## D0nnivain (Mar 13, 2021)

Good for you. It sucks that this happened but you are handling it logically. You know you can't stay so seeing your lawyer & getting a therapist is the best solution under these unfortunate circumstances.


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## SunCMars (Feb 29, 2016)

Gods, a true, nasty effer he is.
What a M-effer. 

True to his moniker, he made two unwed Mothers by effing them.

There is no learnin' this dirty dog.


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## greatgal (9 mo ago)

His friends are helping me out well.They warned him this was going to happen and he needed to quit treating me like crap.They are great guys unlike him


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

Hasn't he heard of birth control? Does he pay child support for the children? 
In a way it's good you know, so you can realize now that he isn't worth bothering about any more.


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## greatgal (9 mo ago)

Diana7 said:


> Hasn't he heard of birth control? Does he pay child support for the children?
> In a way it's good you know, so you can realize now that he isn't worth bothering about any more.


He does pay child support.he had a vasectomy done 2 years ago finally.


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## Diana7 (Apr 19, 2016)

greatgal said:


> He does pay child support.he had a vasectomy done 2 years ago finally.


How did he get away with paying child support all those years without you knowing? Does he see the children with the other women?


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## greatgal (9 mo ago)

Diana7 said:


> How did he get away with paying child support all those years without you knowing? Does he see the children with the other women?


He does see them.Found out about it from an ex of his I have become good friends with.Said those two were fed up with him not paying child support and took him to court without letting me know.


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## BeyondRepair007 (Nov 4, 2021)

greatgal said:


> He does see them.Found out about it from an ex of his I have become good friends with.Said those two were fed up with him not paying child support and took him to court without letting me know.


I’m so glad you are free from that terrible person. Stay strong, keep close to your support, keep talking here. Today is Tuesday, the day you meet with the lawyer to file, right?


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## greatgal (9 mo ago)

BeyondRepair007 said:


> I’m so glad you are free from that terrible person. Stay strong, keep close to your support, keep talking here. Today is Tuesday, the day you meet with the lawyer to file, right?


Yes


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## greatgal (9 mo ago)

Filed for divorce today


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## BeyondRepair007 (Nov 4, 2021)

greatgal said:


> Filed for divorce today


When does he get served?

This will get very real for him when that happens. He will probably freak out and try to convince you to stop.

Are you ready for that?


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## greatgal (9 mo ago)

BeyondRepair007 said:


> When does he get served?
> 
> This will get very real for him when that happens. He will probably freak out and try to convince you to stop.
> 
> Are you ready for that?


Hopefully today,I am standing my ground and telling him no


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## ShatteredKat (Mar 23, 2016)

greatgal

someone once gave me a bit of advice

"You never intended to get involved in a bar fight but crap happens and you find yourself the object of someones ire.
You didn't insult anyone or their girlfriend or their ancestry etc. but you have become the object of their anger. (and some others)
You are trying to avoid blows and suddenly you find yourself looking at 3 fists coming for your face. Best you can do
is block two. Your choice is which one will you take?"

It is going to hurt - resign yourself to having to deal with - and you be stronger for it.


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## Marc878 (Aug 26, 2015)

greatgal said:


> My estranged husband I left yesterday finally told me and it hit me hard.We met up in a neutral place and told me he cheated on me 5 times during our marriage.I was angry and it hit me hard.Pleaded to me to come back and we can work things out.I told him hell no and not coming back,had enough of his crap.Worst part is he has a kid each with two of the women.Got back in my truck and left.This is the worst I have been through with him.I know better,he would of cheated on me if I came back.


Serial cheaters never stop. Stay strong and cut ALL contact.


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