# The AYHA/HYHSWAE Fitness Test



## joelmacdad (Jul 26, 2010)

Morning Gentlemen!

Quick background...married 20 years, I'm 41 she's 37. We are both each others first sexual partner. Saturday night after an incredible sheet tangling connection there was great positive emotion in the air. But my wife still managed to say/ask "I want to be the best for you, have you had sex with anyone else, ever?" <HYHSWAE>

Also, sometimes things just get in the way and we can go a couple of weeks or more w/o connecting, which sometimes results in the "Are you having an affair?" question from her. <AYHA>

Since the questions usually come w/o any real heated battle going on, I label them as light style fitness tests instead of the really bad $hit test coming from other angles.

I need some humorous answers for these questions and I keep coming up stumped. What are some good humor based responses you can think of?


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## Kobo (May 13, 2010)

<HYHSWAE>:

Yeah, there was this girl when I was younger, <describe her younger self> but she doesn't hold a candle to you.


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## CarolinaGirl (Feb 13, 2011)

Love that one!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Mistys dad (Dec 2, 2011)

Have you had sex with anyone else?

"No, would you like me too?"
"No, I don't think so, but does my hand count?"
"Of course not, you think I'd be this awful if I had practiced before you?
"No, but I'm considering it, you should probably keep me worn out for the next few weeks." 
"No, but maybe you could buy a wig and speak with a Russian accent and we'll pretend we're spies"
"No, but I had a dog that would do anything for a taste of peanut butter" (for the most ridiculous)

Are you having an affair?

"Yes, I'm afraid I am. She beautiful and sexy she looks (describe your wife exactly). But I haven't been getting enough lovin' from her. If you see her tell her I'm horny"

"No I'm not. Should I be? Show me what I should be doing"

"No, I'm not. Want to fool around?"

"Yes, I am. You see I'm actually an undercover Rock and Roll God, I must satisfy my groupies. Would you like to see how?"

"Not yet. But, I have been having the craziest cravings for some real wild sex. Know anybody that could handle them?

"Yes I am. In fact I'm meeting her tomorrow night at (insert restaurant name)". Then walk to the phone and make reservations for the two of you. Then say "The best thing about her is she always does the sexiest things for me after a nice meal"

"Maybe, want to get a sleazy hotel room for a couple of hours and pretend?"


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

In the real world, the answer is generally 1) yes and 2) no.


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## joelmacdad (Jul 26, 2010)

Thanks everyone! Great replies. Thanks MD specifically for a long list. I'm sure some of these will create a perfect playfully aggressive scene for future bedroom events!

My wife and I are in a good place right now. I will capitalize on it.


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## okeydokie (Sep 10, 2008)

mistys dad said:


> have you had sex with anyone else?
> 
> "no, would you like me too?"
> "no, i don't think so, but does my hand count?"
> ...


^^playa^^


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## Runs like Dog (Feb 25, 2011)

Have you had sex with anyone else?
"Not today." (which is literally true)

Are you having an affair?
"'Having' is such a loaded word. Do you mean 'performing'?


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## COguy (Dec 1, 2011)

Mistys dad said:


> Have you had sex with anyone else?
> 
> "No, would you like me too?"
> "No, I don't think so, but does my hand count?"
> ...


Can you come up with that stuff on the spot? That's my biggest problem.

I feel like Costanza some time, "I'm sticking with jerk store!"


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## Mistys dad (Dec 2, 2011)

Yea, I have been talking to my wife like that for 25 years.

It doesn't matter if it sounds silly, the more silly, the more the point is made.


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