# Simple question for married men...and ladies?



## Chumpless (Oct 30, 2012)

*Would you settle for 2-3 times per week, with the occasional tidbit 1/3 of the month?*

After a long walk and pleasant chat along the way this is where we're at. Keep in mind too, we've been together almost 15 years and we have a couple of cute little farts running around.

It'll end up being about 60% quickies and 40% gourmet. But I'm by no means a statistician. 

*1) Yes
2) No
3) Not sure
4) You're a fool*

Cheers!
_From a dude working toward getting what we want from marriage_


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## WyshIknew (Aug 18, 2012)

Depends on your age I suppose. Fifteen years together you're probably around 40ish.

You do realise that there are people on this forum who would give their right arm to make love 3 times a week?

As a mid fifties man, yes I would settle for that.

We tend to be about every other day, but typically will do perhaps four days in a row then take two or three days off. It varies I'd hate to have it on some kind of schedule I like it to be spontaneous.


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## Chumpless (Oct 30, 2012)

WyshIknew said:


> It varies I'd hate to have it on some kind of schedule I like it to be spontaneous.


Of course.


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## Saki (Dec 7, 2011)

One thing you REALLY need to get through your head is that it dosen't matter what other people want or do or would settle for. With this post, you are playing a game that gets you nowhere.

THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS IS WHAT IS OK FOR YOUUUUUUUUUUUU


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## TCSRedhead (Oct 17, 2012)

Frequency, yes but I would say more like 70% gourmet and 30% quickies. (Hubby's 45 and I'm 40).


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## Chumpless (Oct 30, 2012)

Saki said:


> THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS IS WHAT IS OK FOR YOUUUUUUUUUUUU


I'm not a narcissist, I'm a reasonable man and trying to find my way to what I feel is within reason for the both of us.

Nobody has all the answers...self included. But we always keep learning and keep on bettering ourselves, huh?

Nothing wrong with throwing thoughts out there.


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## CharlieParker (Aug 15, 2012)

The way I see it the number of times a week doesn't matter. What matters is that both partners needs are being met.

Are you going to "settle" on 2 to 3? "this is where we're at", is that a good place or a bad place?

We've been together 20 years, neither one of us would consider 2-3 (85% gourmet) to be settling. For full discloser, her slow trend to be fine with once a week/10 days is getting alarming.


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## Chumpless (Oct 30, 2012)

CharlieParker said:


> ...her slow trend to be fine with once a week/10 days is getting alarming.


That's what I mean. This would not be okay for me either. Nothing wrong with setting some "perverbial" metrics....pun intended.


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## heavensangel (Feb 12, 2012)

H is away for work 3 weeks at a time then home for 3; with that it'd be hard to say how many times a week. We take advantage of every opportunity when he's home but more often than not, we're more concerned with QUALITY than quantity. We're both in our mid 40's with children that are grown & gone.


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## Gabriel (May 10, 2011)

We are about once a week. My drive is a bit low, but no major problems or ED. Some weeks are 2-3 times. Then other times we might go 10-12 days of drought. If I were to create a decimal, I would guess 1.2 to 1.3 times a week.

Quality is very high most of the time.


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## Maricha75 (May 8, 2012)

Considering what we've been through the last couple years, and the fact that my husband is now on meds which have screwed up his drive.... I would be ECSTATIC if we had sex 2-3 times a week! We're at once a week right now. We have been married 12 years, together 13. We have three kids: 11, 6, & 4. Yea, I would LOVE 3 times a week!


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## Mavash. (Jan 26, 2012)

I don't "settle".

So for me it's not the quantity it's the QUALITY that matters.

Quickies are for times when there is no time. They have their place but we don't do them as part of our regular intimate times together.


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## Chumpless (Oct 30, 2012)

Mavash. said:


> [Quickies] They have their place but we don't do them as part of our regular intimate times together.


Then for me, once a month it is. Yeah right.


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## SoxFan (Jun 9, 2012)

_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## gbrad (Jul 20, 2010)

Probably the closest number I could come up with is 1.7 times a month. No children, early 30's. Not sure exactly how others define quickies, but I would say for us 75% quckies.


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## MEM2020 (Aug 23, 2009)

Your wife is making a good faith effort to prioritize you and please you. 

I believe you should let her know that you would also like to get better at pleasing her.


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## Chumpless (Oct 30, 2012)

MEM11363 said:


> Your wife is making a good faith effort to prioritize you and please you.
> 
> I believe you should let her know that you would also like to get better at pleasing her.


Let her know that yesterday during our walk.


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## IsGirl3 (Nov 13, 2012)

2-3x/week sounds like a lot to me and is wishful thinking. I think 1x is good, although as the other posters said, it's what works for you.


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## SpinDaddy (Nov 12, 2012)

Once a week, occasionally twice. 100% gourmet. Quickie denotes someone hasn’t come full circle. My wife drives the boat in that matter and “If Momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy” and I like it that way.


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## studley (Oct 19, 2011)

Chumpless said:


> *Would you settle for 2-3 times per week, with the occasional tidbit 1/3 of the month?*


Right now I'd settle for 2-3 times per year.


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## 40isthenew20 (Jul 12, 2012)

2-3 times a week, 2 kids and 15 years of marriage- you're a champ. I'm basically in the same boat and is more like once a week (with a few mid-week helping hands) and maybe twice and I'm happy. We were much worse than that for a long time so I'm reaping the benefits of my wife's resurgence, if you will.


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## naga75 (Jul 5, 2012)

4-5 times a week suite me just fine.
with the random quickie thrown in to keep things spontaneous.
i can live with 3, but thats about the minimum before i start to get cranky.
im mid 30s the mrs is 30, one young daughter and a son on the way.
mama has her needs, daddy has his. i make a point (now, after the wreckage caused by not) to meet her emotional and protector-like needs. she is making it a point to meet my cave man monkey sex needs.
as long as we are both getting what we need its smooth sailing in the naga household.
something broke? mr naga will fix.
mr naga had a rough day? mrs naga will make him forget all about it.
winning.


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## MEM2020 (Aug 23, 2009)

IG,
Is your H not very good at making it fun for you?





IslandGirl3 said:


> 2-3x/week sounds like a lot to me and is wishful thinking. I think 1x is good, although as the other posters said, it's what works for you.


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## MEM2020 (Aug 23, 2009)

A few rules of engagement. 

1. No sex without kissing. 
2. No sex where she simultaneously gives you contradictory messages: "I love you, I have no respect for you"

Two is when she gives you the "hurry up and get it over with". Either through a vibe or words. The only response to that is to get up and walk away. 



Chumpless said:


> Let her know that yesterday during our walk.


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