# What happened the first 48 hrs after you said you wanted D?



## Thor (Oct 31, 2011)

The title sums it up. What happened during the first 48 hours after you or your spouse said you wanted to divorce? Did one of you move out? Fights? 911 calls? Calm? Relief? More civility between you?


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## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

I was the one who said I was getting a divorce. Relief on my part that I was correcting a problem I should have corrected after DD1 30 years prior to DD2. Lots of crying and regret on his part. I'm not sure if it was within the first 48 hours that he put his dating profile out there but possibly. He recovered quickly.


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## Oldfaithful (Nov 27, 2013)

There was a lot of anger and crying. He went to stay at his friends house and would call me crying and telling me he loved me. 
I was just relieved to have it out there and to not have to worry about his temper and moods and games and lies. But I was also stressed because I knew it was going to be extremely difficult.


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## lfortender (Sep 18, 2012)

I couldn't imagine because didnt happen to me, YET. But i think she would return to her mother's.


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## Heidi2005 (Oct 27, 2013)

Lots of anger and lashing out for at least 48 hours. He still lives in the basement apartment and plans to move on in June. I think he might of had some relief that it was all out in the open.


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## honcho (Oct 5, 2013)

I never had the official I want a divorce talk. I found out via a friend who saw my name on the public court site. She had moved out 3 weeks earlier. Two days before she moved out is when I got the I don’t think I love you talk and all sorts of excuses why. We both walked around like zombies having no real idea what to say to each other. Both of us walked on eggshells. Came home from work and found a note she was going to stay at her moms a.k.a the new boyfriends house. 

Since I knew a couple of days before she told me I had time to prepare myself, I had my crying fit, the world coming to an end that out of my system enough to bluff when she finally met me to give me the paperwork. She walked in very proud of herself with the paperwork, she saw her suitcases and asked what was going on, told her I knew she had filed and cleaned out the bank accounts. Told her I hoped she would be very happy at her boyfriends house and that the locks were changed. I told her to give me the paperwork, I signed what needed to be signed.

She tried to argue about the locks being changed, never spoke about the paperwork. I told her legally the moment she filed I could change the locks and her lawyer should have told her that. She then begged me to change the locks back so she could see the dogs. Told her to have her lawyer contact me to arrange visitation. 

She just cried and walked to her car, my last words to her were “do you really want a divorce?” She never answered and to this day has never told me wants a divorce. She wanted to see me beg and meltdown, I didn’t in front of her. I was calm and all business. After she left was quite another story, I broke down like I never had before but I didn’t give her the satisfaction of seeing it.


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## QuestioningMyMarriage (Apr 3, 2013)

_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## moxy (Apr 2, 2012)

When I asked for D, stbxh called me for the first time in a year, started being nice, and decided that our marriage needed fixing. Things became so much more confusing.


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## mishu143 (Jun 20, 2011)

moxy said:


> When I asked for D, stbxh called me for the first time in a year, started being nice, and decided that our marriage needed fixing. Things became so much more confusing.


I'm going through that now.... Told him I had enough and I wanted out, he didnt take me serious and he is still here....still being the douche I loathe, but in the meantime I'm just prepping myself to be alone so that I can pay outta my own pocket and have the paper drawn up.... Not waiting around anymore..... But I'm afraid that he will go bonkers and hurt me.... Problem is his crazy is undercover....and unfortunately my emotional tantrums made me seem nutty so I have nothing to back me up except what he has said to me in private which I have posted on here, and the craziness I see in his eyes when he does lose it.... Has anyone ever seen the crazy in another person or is that just me?


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## Keenwa (Oct 26, 2013)

Very similar to Moxy's experience. It had been 2 years of total disconnection at least, no sex no nothing, no dates, but then I said I was done. He was completely shocked, :scratchhead:
I mean completely shocked, he had no idea, it was completely out of left field for him. That totally confused me. Anyhow so when I told him he had no reaction whatsoever. He just looked at me, with no expression in his face. So I'd say for the first 48 hours, he just ignored me more than he had been in the past... so we went from being courteous, little pecks on the cheek, "how's mommy today?" type greetings (I hate being called 'mommy' by my spouse), to no eye contact at all, no talking, no nothing. It was probably 3-4 days later that he showed any emotion to me for the first time.


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## Malpheous (May 3, 2013)

We didn't exactly have that talk. She had me served at work with a temporary Restraining Order. It was BS. Went to court the following week and the whole thing was dropped. Judge gave her a 30-day evict and granted me exclusive of the house and set a 30-day temp custody. 1 month follow-up we finalized custody.


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