# Frustrated



## jackandnoahsmom (Apr 26, 2009)

This is my first thread...I found this board by google and I'm hoping that it can be a good outlet for me.

I've been married for 7 years. Things have been tough pretty much that whole time. We have 2 kids, ages 4 and 2 1/2 and we had them 15 months apart. (Child #2 was a surprise!) Our oldest has autism which has put a big damper on things. I am 100% responsible for everything in all of our lives. I do all the cooking, cleaning, bill paying, laundry, errands, child caring and more. My husband goes to work, comes home and plays world of warcraft. It is pulling teeth to get him to participate in anything. For example, today my sons were invited to a birthday party at Chuck E Cheese and he refuses to go. He says he doesn't feel like it and is going to a friends house instead. Now, no adult LOVES going to Chuck E Cheese...but it's 2 hours...is it going to kill him? We have gone to marriage counseling and I've tried everything under the sun to try to work this out and I just don't know what to do. I feel unappreciated and I am not a priority. We had a little bit of extra money and I needed to buy myself some clothes as I have none and he went and bought some stuff for his computer and then there was no money left over. I love my husband and I want to make things work but my patience is wearing thin. Any advice or help would be so appreciated! Thanks for reading!!


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## Blanca (Jul 25, 2008)

wow i'd probably smash his computer out of shear frustration! but then, that's probably why im on this board too 

sounds like he's off in his own little world and forgot his responsibilities. does he hate his job? my H used to play video games a lot, too, but he said its his way of unwinding.


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## jackandnoahsmom (Apr 26, 2009)

Well he just started his job recently. He was in the Navy for 8 years and got a government job when we left the military. He has good hours and gets paid well, so I'm not sure thats it. Oh believe me...I've thought of many ways to break the computer LOL


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## yazito (Apr 13, 2009)

I cannot help you there because Im pretty much with the same dilema. My sister in law has been living with us for a while and I was asking for over 3 weeks for us to go to old navy because I have no clothes but when she was complaining that she couldn't send e-mail out to her kids he brought the very same laptop Im using right now.


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## martino (May 12, 2008)

What happened in counseling? how does he relate to your son with autism?


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## jackandnoahsmom (Apr 26, 2009)

Counseling was pretty much a waste. We went about 5 years ago and nothing really came of it. He is ok with our autistic son, however he refuses to participate in anything related to his care. He won't take him to school, go to therapy appointments or anything of the like. Today is his day off and he has a doctors appointment. He decided that he doesn't feel like going, and is going to a friends house instead. I just don't get it. He is acting like a child and is being verbally and emotionally abusive and I just can't take it anymore. I want to leave, but it's complicated. I don't have anywhere to go and I don't have a job, because I stay at home with my kids. I don't want to get a divorce but I just feel so helpless right now.


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## martino (May 12, 2008)

I'm trying to get an idea of your family dynamic, why does he stay away from your son's care? how severe is your son? Asperger or straight autism? verbal or non? violent tantrums or none? I know the toll this can take on a family, my son was diagnosed at 3.


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## jackandnoahsmom (Apr 26, 2009)

He is high functioning. I think he has aspergers, but he won't get a definitive diagnosis until 5. He does talk, most of his autism issues are behavioral. He is very smart but lacks social skills. He stims a lot and gets very violent and aggressive sometimes. Overall he is a pretty good kid, but he has his phases


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## lovingmom (Apr 29, 2009)

World of Warcraft (WOW) is a horrible addicted game... my husband plays it.. it gets in the way of so much.. that's the problem right there


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