# Does anyone have a good seperation?



## daisykay (Mar 17, 2010)

Just wondering if anyone out there has gone (or is going) through a somewhat good seperation. No court to determine child support, still remaining decent to each other?


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## stbxhmaybe (Apr 29, 2010)

I am. I believe is better to have a good separation than having a nasty one. She is the one that decided to divorce, but we first separated. When this happened I promised to myself that if this was going to end in a divorce I wasn't going to be the one who was going to turn it into a legal battle.

So far, we have divided the assets, split the attorney fees and ended it in good terms. I hold no resentments, I can say I still love her but I am not in love with her that's the reason why I cannot arrive to hate her and I never will.

Whenever I start feeling upset I say to myself "Everybody has the right to be happy" and if that's what she needs to be happy I need to accept it and respect it. At the end I feel proud of how I have behaved, and we haven't hurt each other again.


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## shadz (Aug 18, 2010)

well , from my point of view if there is good separation they wouldn't give it the name ( separation ) , although it still can be not nasty , but good !!! hmmm i don't think so.


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## PreludeCkN (Jan 21, 2010)

I think I do now. At the beginning of our separation we barely talked, and if we did it was sad. Sad because I wanted to work things out and he didn't. But weeks later, about a month and a half, we started talking again. Our conversations are just like before, as if nothing is the matter. Except we are separated. I asked him at the beginning if he wanted a divorce and he said yes, however, 3 months after and he hasn't done a thing about it. Instead he calls me, and asks me out. I don't call him at all because if I did, I would call him every day, every second and I dont want to overwhelmed him. So I let him call me WHEN he wants to, and he does. We went out shopping, we had dinner, we went to the movies.....was this a date? I asked him not so long ago, how he feels about us, and he just tells me that he is not ready to come back to me yet, and he also tells me that he loves me, but he is not in love with me, but I will give him time. I am leaving it all up to the Lord. Considering what others are going through, I would have to say that I am having a good separation.


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## shadz (Aug 18, 2010)

PC , thanks alot for your words , it helps me alot since am living this situation now , i know now what i have to do .


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## PreludeCkN (Jan 21, 2010)

I wish you the best and I wish you peace!

God Bless =)


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## lastinline (Jul 21, 2009)

I'm afraid we haven't had a "good" separation. It hasn't even been ok. In fact it's been down right ugly. The only good thing that I can say is that it's nearly over. 

Our divorce will be final in less than 2 weeks, and I am doing my best to be gracious in victory. She also has been trying to be a bit more pleasant lately. I guess she's gotten tired of being hung up on.

I wish you smooth passage through this painful chapter in your life. I sometimes feel that people that are gracious during the divorce process are people that are actually relieved that their marriage is over. It just appears more noble to the lookie-loos to feign nobility rather than display actual relief. Just one man's thoughts...

LIL


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## CodeNameBob (Jun 3, 2010)

Mine started out nice enough, both of us wanting to amicably work through everything. Then reality and truth kicked in. Her lies briought her a great deal of pain and denial, thus creating a situation where there was no commincation other thatn email, then through an attorney, then none at all.

For some that may be okay, but for me it was heart breaking, and has left a void in me.

My divorce is final, so now maybe I can feel the void.

Every couple has a different threshold or goal, so it depends where you both are at to truly know how it is going to work out.


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## cyndi_bear27 (Aug 23, 2010)

My separation only lasted 7 days before he filed for divorce. And it's getting very nasty. I still love him and I want him to come back.


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