# Watching porn but NOT masterbating?



## dragonfli

My husband watches porn daily, sometime a few times per day. I am fine with it as long as it is in moderation and he knows this. We have a good sex life that we are both happy with it as far as I know.
I started noticing on our phone bills that he was using a huge amount of data and confronted him. He said that he watches it when he is on break from work or driving home, but that he doesn't always masterbate. he says he is bored and or just killing time.
I do watch porn myself on occasion alone and with him but it always to "get off". Are there guys out there that watch it just to watch it?


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## Adex

No. That's called a porn addiction if he does do that. It's mostly just for a fix. To watch it while you're out of the house on your phone is weird. It sounds like there's probably another explanation for the large data usage on the cell phone.


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## fix this

yes my husband does that. he can watch it for hours and not get off, i think he tries to save his orgasms for me.
sometimes, he also says he watches it to kill time, like if he has 10 minutes to spare, whatever. to me, it's hard to watch porn without going all the way, and i asked him if he felt like he HAD to get off once he started watching it, because that's the way i am, and i would think it's even more so with guys. he said "maybe it was like that when i was a teenager." So yeah your husband might be like that too.


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## heavensangel

How in the world does he drive home and watch porn at the same time? This doesn't seem any safer than texting while driving.....

Sorry....but if he can't make it from work to home without watching it sounds like an addiction.


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## fix this

heavensangel said:


> How in the world does he drive home and watch porn at the same time? This doesn't seem any safer than texting while driving.....
> 
> Sorry....but if he can't make it from work to home without watching it sounds like an addiction.


something to do while stuck in traffic :lol:


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## Cee Paul

I watch it at home only and use the free & secure sites(there are hundreds of them) and when I do watch it's to achieve one thing - and ONE thing only.


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## jaquen

Lots of guys get into a habit of just watching porn, or checking out tit mags, and not always getting off.


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## frustr8dhubby

OK, I will bite. I watch a fair amount of porn and I don't think I have ever masturbated to Internet porn.


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## MrK

So he watches it for the great acting?

:scratchhead:


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## jaquen

MrK said:


> So he watches it for the great acting?
> 
> :scratchhead:


Maybe he watches it because it's arousing, and he likes to be aroused.


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## east2west

Sometimes I just surf for porn like I surf this website or any other one. Other times I watch and masturbate, but almost never finish because I'd rather save it for my wife.

Is there something wrong with that?


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## Cee Paul

frustr8dhubby said:


> OK, I will bite. I watch a fair amount of porn and I don't think I have ever masturbated to Internet porn.


That's like saying you go to Starbucks but never have any coffee. :scratchhead:


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## Broken at 20

Well, I am 20 so guess how much I watch...

But your husband, is a married man. 
Now, I am not in a relationship, but if I had a woman at home ready for fulfill that need, then I probably wouldn't watch porn as much as I do. 
Your husband probably has a developing, if not already developed, porn addiction. 

I understand porn during dry seasons. Like your SO is out of town for something, or pregnant, use some porn to get you by. 

But why watch it when you have it at home?

Just doesn't make sense to me.


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## SimplyAmorous

dragonfli said:


> Are there guys out there that watch it just to watch it?


We don't have cell phones like that... only the computer.. my husband has looked at Playboy soft porn ...downloading them from the time we got our 1st internet connection.....he used to do it in the mornings before work when I should have been having more sex with him. 

And he told me (which I do believe ).... that he has never masterbated to it, he felt like that would be "cheating" (his words)... I looked at him & said... "then I am a cheater" cause I have done it.. That was 4 yrs ago. Before that time, we never graced the masterbation talk... 

I learned that day... he has saved EVERY orgasm for ME - since our getting together... even before marriage.. he told me when I started sticking my hands down his pants, he stopped







... I was floored by that. 

I do believe others would think I am a fool... but if you knew the backstory of this...the truth was...I was upset & even cried learning he DIDN'T -because at the time, my sex drive was higher than his...I opened up the masterbation dialog... and to hear he was even ABLE to do that for 19 long yrs married -just proved to me his sex drive is not like other mens- the exact opposite of what I wanted to hear at the time...

So if he wanted to make me  , telling me he DID masterbate - cause he couldn't handle it = because he was such a horny beast -would have been more music to my ears! There was simply no reason to lie to me....as I believe this is normal for near every married man under the sun. 

This is why I do believe his words to me. It's possible.. but I feel pretty rare. If you are having alot of sex, it is more possible -for sure.


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## Tony55

dragonfli said:


> Are there guys out there that watch it just to watch it?


What difference does it make? If you've brought porn into your lives as an activity to be done individually, and not as a couple, then I'd say who cares what he does when he watches it, he might stand on his head, who knows, will it make a difference? And if so, why?
_"My husband watches porn daily, *sometime a few times per day*. I am fine with it *as long as it is in moderation* and he knows this."​_*Moderation.*

I'd say there's a larger question to be asked here than whether he actually masturbates each time he watches porn three times a day.

T


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## RandomDude

> He said that he watches it when he is on break from work or *driving home*


Pardon?

Erm... surprised he hasn't had an accident


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## Dulciean

My guy seems to use it as a diversion, stress reliever ( ha!) and just to look at those gorgeous women. Not always for masturbation. I try not to overanalyse it since I've been learning so much here at TMA!


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## dragonfli

Yes, sorry I meant he watches it when stuck in traffic.

The moderation thing was...I am wondering how much is too much? I am a bit concerned that he might have a problem. He tells me when he watches and how much. I would like to think that we have fairly open communication. Niether one of us knows how much is too much just that if it (or anything) is affecting our relationship in any way then it needs to be discussed and negotiated.

I sometimes feel as though when he watches it too much that he isn't always as "motivated" or has as much sexual energy.

He still wants to have sex and initiates but when he watches alot during the day he isn't as "horny"..for lack of a better word.

If he hasn't looked at too much during the day then he is much more motivated and attentive.

So yes, I guess that it may be affecting our sex life. I did some reading this past weekend regarding "arousal addiction" and I am thinking that because he isn't masterbating when he watches it, that this may be more suitable to the situation. 

We watched the "Great Porn Experiment" together and he said (without me even asking) that he would try no porn for 90 days.


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