# confused wife



## saraa (Dec 3, 2012)

Hello 
I really need guidline.plz reply me 
I am 30 years old women ,got married to 40 years old, 5 years back. I have a 3 year's old baby. 
Apparently I am living a very happy life. My husband is very loving and caring. But problem does lie in our sex life. I want ask ,is it normal to have sex once in a two months. I want to explain here that at our wedding night he was unable to perform. We went on honeymoon and my husband tried his best but always got limb at climax. It took almost one month to make me unvirgen. Within these five years of marriage there comes a time when we did sex twice a week too and now the last time he did after two months and again got limb at climax. Plaza tell me ....is it normal. One thing I have to tell that I am pretty. And he thinks I am sexy too. 
Waiting for reply


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

I think that have your age and when you got married mixed up above.

How old is your husband?

About your wedding night. It sounds like this was the first time for sex between the two of you. Was it the first time for him in his life?

The pressure of having to perform sexually on the wedding night can lead to what happened. If that happened once or twice at the start of y our relationship... then you two moved into have more normal sexual relations, I'd say that it was not an issue.

But it sounds like this is a many year problem. There are things that can be done to help him.

He needs to see a doctor to have his testosterone levels checked. If it’s low it could lead to the problem he has.

If his testosterone levels are ok, them he needs to get check for a physical cause of ED (erectile dysfunction). Hopefully it’s something that can be fixed medically. The doctor might also be able to prescribe Viagra that will help with it as well.

His low interest in sex could be that he just has a low sex drive because of low hormones or it could be that he’s very embarrassed by his problem and so avoids sex.


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## saraa (Dec 3, 2012)

Thanx for your reply. 
As you asked about my husband age. He is near 40 now and I am near 30 . At time marriage he was 34 and I was 24. Then how it can be an age factor. Well one thing I forgot to mention that he has sex drive,that's why he use to masterbate a lot. He toled me honestly. It always made me feel so bad and undesirable. I discussed with him and he stoped telling me but I can sense he still do dis.
I am still confused about this strange relationship .....we both love each other then why we r not comfortable with each other bodies, even I use to have orgasm rarly . Might be 1 time out of 10, although I have desire for this. 
He is da only man in my life . Even I hve no past. 
Plz help me. As I am feeling so incomplete undesirable. I a


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## appletree (Oct 9, 2012)

That can really have a myriad of reasons. Most likely it has something to do with his (and your) upbringing. The thing is that in most cases partner do search each other for complement their problems. If you have the money search a good counsellor (don't decide for the first). What was the relationship between his parents? Him and his siblings? To sort such a problem out you really must go very deep. What are his/yur dreams? Why are you attracted to that man? Things can change no doubt, but both partners must want that change and you must start at other points before you tackle the sex issue.


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## Maneo (Dec 4, 2012)

If he seems to have no problem with self gratification but it is difficult for him to sustain an erection when it is the two of you, perhaps it is finding the thing that most rouses him. It could be physical. It could be mental. Could be something he wants to do to you or something he would like you to do to him. Perhaps he is hesitant to reveal these intimate things to you.
It will require some open and honest sharing between the two of you.


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## CuddleBug (Nov 26, 2012)

I'm 39 years old but since I weight train, eat healthy and take non - steroidal supplements, my sex drive is still high like when I was in my 20's and even teens at times. Now when I am off my supplements and don't weight train much, my drive drops a lot, so it is an age thing. At my low, having sex once a week is fine, at my highs, almost every day and sometimes 2 - 4 times a day.


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## stonorobert (Dec 4, 2012)

It sounds like this was the first time for sex between the two of you.


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## Woodchuck (Nov 1, 2012)

CuddleBug said:


> I'm 39 years old but since I weight train, eat healthy and take non - steroidal supplements, my sex drive is still high like when I was in my 20's and even teens at times. Now when I am off my supplements and don't weight train much, my drive drops a lot, so it is an age thing. At my low, having sex once a week is fine, at my highs, almost every day and sometimes 2 - 4 times a day.




I am 66, bum knee, overweight, eat lots of blood rare venison...sex once a week would be bottom line minimum, 2-3 much better. I would like a last night and again this morning senario, but have to get up early so that is out now..... 

I need to orgasm 10-20 times a week to keep from climbing the walls......and pestering the wife half to death....Married at 19, and probably need sex as frequently now as back then......

I started taking DHEA about a month ago...Seems to make me irritable, but no change in sex drive....

Had TURP (prostate surgery) about 4 months ago....My orgasms have increased in intensity to where they may be more intense than when I was 19....


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