# I am confused?



## IsItme71 (Dec 9, 2012)

I just dont get it? 22 years of marriage, I do the very best I can do with, Home,Career and Intamacy? I treat my woman with the utmost respect, I cook everyday, I clean, do Laundry, tend the house and all repairs, pick up the kids from school, take them to their games and extra activities, and when it comes to making sure your gal gets hers when it comes to sex!!!! I go all the way, cunninylinquis, foreplay, dress up, submissive, ect!! I have all the bedroom Gizmo's and Gadgets's, I love more than anything to Bust out a Bedroom Gizmo, thats intendid to bring her to a screaming OOOOO!! But every time its like its the first time something is introduced to the SCENE??? WTH!!! Why is it like this???:scratchhead:


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## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

What are you saying, that your wife is lukewarm in the bedroom despite your efforts, your wife isn't getting screaming O's from the toys or that your wife is never in the mood?


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## IsItme71 (Dec 9, 2012)

_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## IsItme71 (Dec 9, 2012)

IsItme71;1273o149 said:


> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Ohh no, i make dagone sure she gets hers one way or another, but if i bust out a gizmo it becomes friction and thats what baffles me? I am only makin sure again that she is satisfied, this is not every time we have relations but dagone, its Saturday night the day went great i start the engine get it purring, im getting some real good feed back, i bust out a gizmo and wham!!!! Things turn into an argument that ends up into a back to back see you tomorrow kinda thing!!!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

IsItme71 said:


> Ohh no, i make dagone sure she gets hers one way or another, but if i bust out a gizmo it becomes friction and thats what baffles me? I am only makin sure again that she is satisfied, this is not every time we have relations but dagone, its Saturday night the day went great i start the engine get it purring, im getting some real good feed back, i bust out a gizmo and wham!!!! Things turn into an argument that ends up into a back to back see you tomorrow kinda thing!!!
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Here's a hint: If your wife is getting all revved up and excited about being with YOU, then give her what she wants, i.e. YOU. The toys turn her off. So get rid of the toys. You know the joke: Man goes to the doctors and says "Doc, every time I move my arm like this it hurts". The doctor tells the man "Then stop doing that with your arm".

The point is that if your wife is happy with you, then just make it about you and her. If she doesn't want the "the wand", "Good Vibe" or the "Sex master 9000" then don't try to force them on her.


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## Woodchuck (Nov 1, 2012)

IsItme71 said:


> I just dont get it? 22 years of marriage, I do the very best I can do with, Home,Career and Intamacy? I treat my woman with the utmost respect, I cook everyday, I clean, do Laundry, tend the house and all repairs, pick up the kids from school, take them to their games and extra activities, and when it comes to making sure your gal gets hers when it comes to sex!!!! I go all the way, cunninylinquis, foreplay, dress up, submissive, ect!! I have all the bedroom Gizmo's and Gadgets's, I love more than anything to Bust out a Bedroom Gizmo, thats intendid to bring her to a screaming OOOOO!! But every time its like its the first time something is introduced to the SCENE??? WTH!!! Why is it like this???:scratchhead:


Why don't you ask? Last night I asked my wife about a "GIZMO" she hadn't been into....She said Yes, try it....

Im afraid it's as simple as that...If she wants to try it she will say so....


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## IsItme71 (Dec 9, 2012)

Believe me i totally get that? But in a relationship as long as ours i have been giving her IE. Me and Me dont get her off!!! It feels so good, so wet, so ahhhh, me dont get her to the bigg OHHH,Me get mine! What about Her? I Know this, the point intended is to get her, "HERS" so why is this an ISSUE???
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Yep, it sounds like she does not like the gizmos... let her make more decisions about the toys.

Have you two ever had a discussion about them?


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## IsItme71 (Dec 9, 2012)

Whats the deal, I have been selfish in our relationship for years and now all i focus on is getting my gal off and its an issue? Why are woman so complicated???
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

IsItme71 said:


> Believe me i totally get that? But in a relationship as long as ours i have been giving her IE. Me and Me dont get her off!!! It feels so good, so wet, so ahhhh, me dont get her to the bigg OHHH,Me get mine! What about Her? I Know this, the point intended is to get her, "HERS" so why is this an ISSUE???


You really need to be much clearer on what you are saying.


What is "IE".

What is "Me and Me"? Do you mean that she cannot have an orgasm from penetration?

Why does it take a gizmo to get her off?


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

IsItme71 said:


> Whats the deal, I have been selfish in our relationship for years and now all i focus on is getting my gal off and its an issue? Why are woman so complicated???


What do you mean that you have been selfish for so long? Does it mean that you up to some time recently you did not take care of her sexual needs? Does it mean that you did not do things like help around the house?

Does she work outside the home? How many children do you have?


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## IsItme71 (Dec 9, 2012)

We have had gizmos our whole relationship together, we have shopped for gizmos, they are part of our relations but the question is? Any time i bust out a gizmo its like the first time!! We question, I defend, its like i might as well run the term 2 min- 20 min and hour whatever, i get mine, ok were done? Wth
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Plan 9 from OS (Jul 13, 2012)

IsItme71 said:


> Whats the deal, I have been selfish in our relationship for years and now all i focus on is getting my gal off and its an issue? Why are woman so complicated???
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Oral? Hands? If your wife doesn't like the gizmos, then maybe she's content to have orgasms from your fingers and/or tongue??? I don't get why this is so complicated for you. If your wife suddenly wants to start eating a healthier diet and you decide to make a healthy dish she doesn't like - like Brussels sprouts for example - don't be surprised if she gets upset if you serve her a heaping plate of Brussels sprouts. You may be trying your best to serve her healthy foods, but they have to be foods that she likes or it simply will not work.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Can you answer the questions?


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## Woodchuck (Nov 1, 2012)

IsItme71 said:


> Whats the deal, I have been selfish in our relationship for years and now all i focus on is getting my gal off and its an issue? Why are woman so complicated???
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


No, you are not being selfish...And you are not the first man to be baffled in your quest for the sometimes elusive female orgasm. It often takes almost infinite patience....In answer to your last question....Because their WOMEN......If they were just soft guys, they wouldn't be nearly so captivating......


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

IsItme71,

Seems that you are not going to answer the questions. So i'll make a guess. You want her to have an orgam by some manner that you think she should be having it. She wants it some other way. 

Here's a book that might help you a lot...

Slow Sex: The Art and Craft of the Female Orgasm, Nicole Daedone - a recipe for reconnecting emotionally and physically.


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## KendalMintcake (Nov 3, 2012)

What is this guy talking about? I read the whole thread and still don't know what the problem is. Hilarious. All I can tell is he gives gives gives, and gets sex, bit still wants something he is not getting - and he won't just say in a sentence 'I want her to xyz and she wont't'. 

Dude answer the question and tell the people here in simple English what the problem is!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## IsItme71 (Dec 9, 2012)

EleGirl said:


> What do you mean that you have been selfish for so long? Does it mean that you up to some time recently you did not take care of her sexual needs? Does it mean that you did not do things like help around the house?
> 
> Does she work outside the home? How many children do you have?


 Ok, sorry i had to put kids to bed! No i have always taken care of the home! Yes we both work outside the home. And we have 3 boys from 5-17. And when i say being selfish i am saying during love making as soon as i get mine i wouldn't worry about bringing her to the finish line! Now to be more clear we have been together 22 years for the first five mind blowing bigtop sex than the next seven hit it like a rabbit and run for the most part to sum that up! Now the past 5 i have tried to treat her like Cleopatra 
Sexually!! So if my gizmo is a wand, or a ball or a whip and just our last couple of sessions ago she was pulling my hair out and screaming in joy because i brought her across the finish line, why is it when i bring in the gizmo again its like the first time ever in the relationship?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## IsItme71 (Dec 9, 2012)

How do i put in clearer English? We have been together since high school, our sex life has been and is amazing, over some years you get into a rut where the man will go as far to Cum and its lights out! Now toys have always been in our relationship, nothing new, but now i foucus on getting her to cum "every time " intercourse, using my tongue, banging away with all fingers and sessions in between when i break out the gizmo, its like "whats that" whats that for" umm thats the gizmo that made you scream and wake the kids up 2 weeks ago!! Thats the gizmo you picked out when we went to the adult store, thats the gizmo that you said last time to pound harder, to twist and turn the gizmo you directed my hand with in certain motions!! And your asking me " why am i confused"
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## IsItme71 (Dec 9, 2012)

Thank you to everyone that chimed in on the topic! I have had many conversation's with my wife about this topic and she is unclear why she is this way, maybe age, maybe bearing children i dont know, thought maybe this forum would be some where for me to start?
We both are in our 40's i feel like i still have the sex drive as i did in my twenties, but much wiser now and all i want to do is focus on pleasuring her, but women dont think like men and i guess thats what i am struggling with, that and i guess its not that important to her as it is to me?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Woodchuck (Nov 1, 2012)

IsItme71 said:


> Ohh no, i make dagone sure she gets hers one way or another, but if i bust out a gizmo it becomes friction and thats what baffles me? I am only makin sure again that she is satisfied, this is not every time we have relations but dagone, its Saturday night the day went great i start the engine get it purring, im getting some real good feed back, i bust out a gizmo and wham!!!! Things turn into an argument that ends up into a back to back see you tomorrow kinda thing!!!
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Newleyweds like you and your wife are just reaching the point where you are really comfortable with one another..

Concentrate on her moods and desires, look for little turn ons that get under her skin....Put away the toys until she asks for them...

I am afraid you missed the boat by not concentrating on her pleasure from day one....

I don't think my wife failed to orgasm once in our first 22 years.....or 32 for that matter....

t's like you were just coasting through the class, and now it's final exam time, and suddenly you have to pull all nighters to catch up...Relax a bit, I don't think she will give you a D-, and if she does, just take the class over next semester....You (and she) win eithe way....


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## IsItme71 (Dec 9, 2012)

Woodchuck said:


> Newleyweds like you and your wife are just reaching the point where you are really comfortable with one another..
> 
> Concentrate on her moods and desires, look for little turn ons that get under her skin....Put away the toys until she asks for them...
> 
> ...


Woodchuck,
Newlyweds???? I think you missed something !
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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