# possible divorce



## javelinpr (Jul 28, 2009)

So last fight was because i was an idiot. We were at our parent house, my father had told me things that hurt me very badly while my wife was showering and when she came out she had the most hideous shirt ive ever seen. I started joking and told her it was ugly in front of everybody and i got we had a little discussion in front of everybody but keeping composure and not going straight out fighting. so she said this opened her eyes about how crappy a marriage this is and she wants out of it. we have talked argued, cried and talked some more about this and how we are going to do this. Somehow during the day i realized she is amazing and i will like to stay with her but she doesn't want to. I told he we should stay together she is mad and doesn't want me sleeping with her at all.

We had this kind of fight around 6 months ago. She says i dont clean, i spend a lot of time in the computer and im lousy with her. All true except me being lousy except for spending too much time on the computer. Also she hates me for watching porn. So i decided to stop a couple days ago to see if im able to be more caring and loving in bed with her because i sometimes fantasize about being a pornstar and all that. 

Im addicted to the internet i cant stop it. sometimes i think being alone on a house wouldn't matter at all since i can find new girls and play around as much as i want to. Also addicted to porn but im breaking that addiction. Im overweight, doing regular at college, a failure at work, a failure in our marriage in fact i can catalog my life as a failure right now. Seems like my drive dies in matter of days and i cant finish anything i start. 

I don't know what to do. keep with the separation or fight for a reconciliation. Please help me here. Ive been married for 4 years, shes older by 5 years, we've had amazing times together and we LOVE our dog so much it feel like i'm giving up a son. 

Its a pretty hard decision and i don't feel like making it right now.


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## 827Aug (Apr 27, 2008)

Hate to say this, but you sound like a slacker with a low self-esteem. At least you admit to the problems. The best thing you can do is work on yourself. Perhaps even going to counseling would be a good start. It's hard for others to love us when we don't even love ourselves.

Why was it necessary to even make a comment on the wife's blouse? It's usually best to say nothing unless you have something nice to say.


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## dobo (Jun 30, 2009)

Dump the computer completely. No more porn, either.

Put all of your focus on your marriage. And to that end, exercise. It will do a lot for your self-image as well as how you feel overall because it releases endorphins and is a natural high.

Get into counseling. You really need therapy.

Computers and porn are about avoiding intimacy. You're not living life. You're viewing it. You're passive. Get active.

And the kind of crack you made about your wife's shirt? C'mon. Do you have any capacity to think before you open your mouth? You seem to be very immature.

Do the hard work necessary to grow up.


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