# Help.



## lonelydad (Dec 13, 2008)

My wife and I have been married for almost 15 years, known each other for 17. 

We've had problems in the times in the past, where she initiated separation twice. We cared for each other enough where we went to a therapist and worked on our marriage. We always ended up stronger. 

This last time was a doozy, I caught her online chatting with an old flame and she had met him two times this week. She swears they didn't sleep together (and yes, I do believe her), but she tells me that she doesn't feel passion and the romance that television and film offers.

This guy is married with 3 kids and his wife has no clue, I am angry, depressed, hurt - you know.

This time is different, we have a 4 year old now. He means the world to both of us. She says she would go to a therapist and would try for our child. 

I will take part of the blame, we're both very different, politically, spiritually, ideology, but we have respected our differences. 

I'm at a loss and don't know what to do. I've moved to a part of the country where I have no friends and she has her family. I hurt just thinking about not seeing my child every day. She knows that, and wants me there.

We're going to try and live together while we try and work this out, is that the best idea? 

I can't eat and sleep, my son can tell there is something going on, and he starts to freak out because of it. Help.


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

lonelydad-

From what you say, you really really love her. It sounds like there is every chance this could work. So what is it about her that most annoys you?


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## lonelydad (Dec 13, 2008)

I really take the blame for this. I feel guilty not being more open to her ideas. I can honestly say that she's tried over the years, but I've been really "proud" and felt I shouldn't consider new viewpoints (even from my wife)

I think that she's tried many times and I haven't been willing to do much by way of concession.

I fear the damage has been and there's not getting her back.

To answer your question, what annoys me is her not backing up my beliefs, but I understand why she doesn't - it's not her beliefs. This might not make sense, I apologize for rambling.


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

lonelydad said:


> I really take the blame for this. I feel guilty not being more open to her ideas. I can honestly say that she's tried over the years, but I've been really "proud" and felt I shouldn't consider new viewpoints (even from my wife)


What ideas? Can you name the most challenging one?


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