# should I be concerned?



## faithfulwife85 (Jul 4, 2011)

My husband is on his phone or his lap top on a daily basis looking and searching for girls to look at. 

A few weeks back, we had an issue with him masturbating to pictures of my friends. He promised me that he would not do that anymore.

I know this may sound bad but I check his computer history daily and he constantly search's for beautiful women to through facebook daily. He also searches bisexual and lesbian women. but does not contact them.

Should I be concerned?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Prodigal (Feb 5, 2011)

faithfulwife85 said:


> A few weeks back, we had an issue with him masturbating to pictures of my friends. He promised me that he would not do that anymore.


This caught my eye. Do your friends post nude or semi-nude photos of themselves out there? Or was your H just looking at them fully clothed and masturbating? Just wanted some clarification on that.

Lots of folks will tell you there's nothing abnormal or unusual about men (and women) looking at porn and getting off to it. I'm not going to dispute that. My take on it is if it bothers you, then it's a problem.

Your asking if you should be concerned, in my opinion, is asking if it's okay for it to bother you. JMO. So, does it bother you? I wouldn't care for my H was looking at photos of my friends and getting off.


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## Homemaker_Numero_Uno (Jan 18, 2011)

Sure you should be concerned.
You should be concerned that he is not concerned even after you have pointed out to him that you have concerns.
You can keep putting your finger over random leaks in the bucket but it's not going to solve the problem of how are you going to get something to drink from it if your hands are busy plugging up the leaks. In other words, you are being kept busy dealing with specific behaviors, whereas he is shifting behaviors while you are being kept busy. This will lead to a mental breakdown on your part if not just sheer exhaustion. Take a huge step back and look at the bigger picture, he is unconcerned that you are not concerned, also he is not concerned with his behavior. It's a lack of perspective overall, he is out of touch with his actions and you are overly in touch with them and not more on the fact that it is unacceptable for you to have to deal with policing his day to day or minute to minute activities. In a mature relationship, he would have dealt with his issues, not changed behavior to equally unacceptable.


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## phyxius (Jul 5, 2010)

I wouldn't have been concerned until I read the part about looking up your friends on FB?? That's wrong. Porn is one thing but fantasizing about your wife's friends and masterbating to it is wrong!


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