# The day i told her i wanted the divorce



## ason (Mar 11, 2015)

Hello friends, that's my second thread here, and in this thread i want to share with you what happened when i told her i wanted the divorce.
I thought she would be devastated and sad, maybe she would tell me that she loves me and want to work things out on our marriage. I wasn't expecting she would humiliate herself and cry to death, she's not like that and i know because she's tough. But i thought she would ask me why, what was her mistakes, maybe she would worry, maybe she would ask me what can we do, beg me, but no... she said things about living on her own, worried about paying bills because her salary is not enough, worried about finances, make ends meet, place to live because she doesn't want to live with her mom, etc. After all those things she told me i realized that she never loved me, the only thing she cares about is money, she was married with me just because i could pay all our bills, because i'm the financial provider, etc. I realized she is a original gold digger. What do you think about that? Am i right dont you think?
We've been married for almost 8 years, no kids.


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## Mr.Fisty (Nov 4, 2014)

Well, she definitely sounds like she is a me first person, and not in a good way either. She puts herself first, and she narrows that focus mostly onto herself.

Sometimes we barely know the people we get involved with. We can only see what they project, and what other data we can gather from observation. Time to focus on you and healing. She is just a distraction to keep you stuck.


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## YupItsMe (Sep 29, 2011)

You are so lucky you do not have kids. 

Watch out for the alimony angle. Gold diggers want all they can get for free and have no remorse about your paying their way. 

Makes me sick but I am sooooo happy for you that you don't have kids.


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## ConanHub (Aug 9, 2013)

That, sadly, is all some people marry for.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ason (Mar 11, 2015)

Mr.Fisty said:


> Well, she definitely sounds like she is a me first person, and not in a good way either. She puts herself first, and she narrows that focus mostly onto herself.
> 
> Sometimes we barely know the people we get involved with. We can only see what they project, and what other data we can gather from observation. Time to focus on you and healing. She is just a distraction to keep you stuck.


I agree with you!


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## ason (Mar 11, 2015)

YupItsMe said:


> You are so lucky you do not have kids.
> 
> Watch out for the alimony angle. Gold diggers want all they can get for free and have no remorse about your paying their way.
> 
> Makes me sick but I am sooooo happy for you that you don't have kids.


Thank God i didn't have kids with this *****!


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## ason (Mar 11, 2015)

ConanHub said:


> That, sadly, is all some people marry for.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


That's why i'll never get married anymore, marriage is a trap!!


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## SARAHMCD (Jul 2, 2014)

I don't necessarily agree with this. It sounds like she is sad that you are leaving her, that you no longer love her. But then, yes, self preservation comes into affect. And she does need to be concerned about how she's going to live. Not only is she losing you but she's losing her sense of security - her whole world and way of life is about to change. 
That may sound like gold digging, but its not necessarily. I'd need to know more about your relationship - you didn't say why you are leaving her?


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

ason said:


> That's why i'll never get married anymore, *marriage is a trap*!!


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## Pluto2 (Aug 17, 2011)

It sort of sounds as though she was planning, or at least thinking about, her exit from the marriage, too.


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## ason (Mar 11, 2015)

SARAHMCD said:


> I don't necessarily agree with this. It sounds like she is sad that you are leaving her, that you no longer love her. But then, yes, self preservation comes into affect. And she does need to be concerned about how she's going to live. Not only is she losing you but she's losing her sense of security - her whole world and way of life is about to change.
> That may sound like gold digging, but its not necessarily. I'd need to know more about your relationship - you didn't say why you are leaving her?


Here's why http://talkaboutmarriage.com/going-through-divorce-separation/254985-why-im-separating.html


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

I see, so you think she should defer to you as the hb. She doesn't agree so be on your way and see if you can find someone that agrees. This should've been ironed out before marriage, you can't change the rules by yourself later. 

I also see a lot of what's wrong with her, so since we can assume you're not perfect you should probably give some thought to ways you can improve for the future.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## GusPolinski (Jan 21, 2014)

ason said:


> Hello friends, that's my second thread here, and in this thread i want to share with you what happened when i told her i wanted the divorce.
> I thought she would be devastated and sad, maybe she would tell me that she loves me and want to work things out on our marriage. I wasn't expecting she would humiliate herself and cry to death, she's not like that and i know because she's tough. But i thought she would ask me why, what was her mistakes, maybe she would worry, maybe she would ask me what can we do, beg me, but no... she said things about living on her own, worried about paying bills because her salary is not enough, worried about finances, make ends meet, place to live because she doesn't want to live with her mom, etc. After all those things she told me i realized that she never loved me, the only thing she cares about is money, she was married with me just because i could pay all our bills, because i'm the financial provider, etc. I realized she is a original gold digger. What do you think about that? Am i right dont you think?
> We've been married for almost 8 years, *no kids*.


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## ason (Mar 11, 2015)

GusPolinski said:


>


That was funny! LOL!!!


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## ason (Mar 11, 2015)

lifeistooshort said:


> I see, so you think she should defer to you as the hb. She doesn't agree so be on your way and see if you can find someone that agrees. This should've been ironed out before marriage, you can't change the rules by yourself later.
> 
> I also see a lot of what's wrong with her, so since we can assume you're not perfect you should probably give some thought to ways you can improve for the future.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Yes i think, people change with time, that is a problem.


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