# The Bro Code...



## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Just curious really, had a chat with one of my mates about one of his mates' wives causing dramas accusing him of this and that when he didn't do anything. This particular friend of his is also a cuckold, and his wife has 3 kids all from different men while married and his apparent son could actually instead be his nephew's! Yet he stands up for his wife and even starts dramas with his own mates whenever his wife accuses them of flirting with her.

My wife also gets me to stand up for her whenever she feels uncomfortable around someone but obviously it seems many women out there abuse their power (thankfully my wife doesn't do this much and if anything she hates it when I go all violent on people's asses), and end up breaking up mates in the process. Where do we as men draw the line when it comes to this?


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## Maneo (Dec 4, 2012)

Sounds like everyone could do with a little more self control and adult behavior in your entire group. 
Is alcohol a factor in these fights?


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## Gaia (Apr 27, 2012)

Does your wife stick up for you when it comes to her friends?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Tall Average Guy (Jul 26, 2011)

It strikes me that there is a line between supporting/protecting your wife and enabling her bad behavior. In many ways, it is hard to define but you know it when you see it. 

My wife has crossed that line only once that I can recall. A guy was disrespectful and I called him on it. She went after him a bit, which was fine becuase he deserved it. But there reached a point where she was abusing my cover, if you will, and I calmly let her know that she had made her point and needed to drop it. Interestingly, both came out happy with me on how things ended up.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Maneo said:


> Sounds like everyone could do with a little more self control and adult behavior in your entire group.
> Is alcohol a factor in these fights?


My group is fine, it's just further down my social group (mates of mates, etc) who seem to be a bit 'interesting', I just found my mate's story rather disturbing that his mate believes everything his wife says about my friend despite her cheating on him 3+ times lol

However it did make me recall the dramas throughout my life with men (including myself) starting up BS fights over what women said about some such and such. Curious really



Gaia said:


> Does your wife stick up for you when it comes to her friends?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Most of the time yes, but of course she whines about me everytime we have a big fight, just like I whine on TAM lol
Still, it's different 
It's not like I tell my wife "oh hey, this woman is flirting with me... charge!!" lol



Tall Average Guy said:


> It strikes me that there is a line between supporting/protecting your wife and enabling her bad behavior. In many ways, it is hard to define but you know it when you see it.
> 
> My wife has crossed that line only once that I can recall. A guy was disrespectful and I called him on it. She went after him a bit, which was fine becuase he deserved it. But there reached a point where she was abusing my cover, if you will, and I calmly let her know that she had made her point and needed to drop it. Interestingly, both came out happy with me on how things ended up.


Interesting, come to think of it my wife has crossed the line more than a few times, embarrassing really. She's normally calm however, though I still end up her front-line offence. Sheez, come to think of it, women can be vicious O.O


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## Gaia (Apr 27, 2012)

Lmao thats understandable random. The whole charge thing that is. Btw... If the woman is known for lying and manipulating... It can be like the boy who cried wolf. If your wife doesnt lie about things like that then perhaps consider talking to her about the incidents first to make sure she isnt over reacting or took things the wrong way.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Yeah that normally works depending on her mood lol

Sometimes it just infuriates her like fueling the fire however, nasty really, and sometimes the person in question infuriates me too - which always ends up with a whole lot of nasty lol. Hasn't happened for a while though, but my mate's story... hell it brought back memories.

It makes me wonder really, about the stuff we men tend to do for our SOs, and if it's really necessary. And should we trust our brothers more than our wives? Etc etc... funny how different women fight, some handle things themselves, others like my wife shove the man in front and then declare war lol


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## SoulMeetsBody (Sep 22, 2012)

This brings back some memories...

My wife ranges from hate to general dislike on any friend that I had before she came into the picture. So, basically, the best friends that I have. 
I probably dealt with the fights the wrong way when they actually took place, because I felt like my friends were being more reasonable than she was, and their side of things made more sense to me. This was before we were married or engaged. 

But, hindsight is 20/20

I think the best way to handle things, especially if you have a walking-on-eggshells dynamic like me when it comes to friends, is to avoid them EVER BEING AROUND EACH OTHER, EVER! Lol, not really.
The best way I can think of is to set boundaries with your wife, and friends if you need to. And set certain things straight like, wifey, if you start something, you finish it, don't drag me into the middle of it. If [insertfriendnamehere] says something that crosses the line, I will step in and deal with it as I see fit. 
Every time something happened between my wife and a friend, she put me right in the middle of it. Then I'm almost forced to choose between her or a good friend, usually over something so effing stupid. Its a downright sh*tty position to be in.


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

Why haven't you helped your mate escape the abuse his cheating wife has inflicted upon him? Cuckolds are abused husbands in my opinion and the women who do it should be locked behind bars for violating their human rights.


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## Gaia (Apr 27, 2012)

Ok I dont understand this whole thing here. Firstly... Yes its wrong for your wives to start crap. With that I agree with. However, this whole bro code thing and choosing between wife or friends is riduclous(edit: forgot to add imo). You pledged your lives to your wives so imo you should have thier back anyway if things cross the line. 

Secondly... I dont understand why some women try to break up thier spouses long term friendships with other guys in the first place. I think boundaries should be in place from the get go. Now my man has a few friends he knew long before I came into the picture. I may talk to a few on occassion but only when he is around. I have never had any issues with his friends. 

Now I did have to drop a few of my female friends in the past because they became jealous, possesive, competative, irrational, ect. They felt like it was wrong for me to care about his opinion and resorted to labeling him controlling, ect. They were toxic, made me choose between them or him literally and I chose him.

He is the one I love, am fvcking, ect... Not them. So he comes first for me. Of course that may just be me though.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

> The best way I can think of is to set boundaries with your wife, and friends if you need to. And set certain things straight like, wifey, if you start something, you finish it, don't drag me into the middle of it. If [insertfriendnamehere] says something that crosses the line, I will step in and deal with it as I see fit.


Yeah that sounds like a good way to do it. Or try to disappear lol



> Every time something happened between my wife and a friend, she put me right in the middle of it. Then I'm almost forced to choose between her or a good friend, usually over something so effing stupid. Its a downright sh*tty position to be in.


Oh yeah I fking hate that! heh
With aquaintances or strangers it's already a pain in the a$$, but with mates it's fking tough, have to uphold the bro code while at the same time be a man for your wife over the most ridicolous BS!!!


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Shaggy said:


> Why haven't you helped your mate escape the abuse his cheating wife has inflicted upon him? Cuckolds are abused husbands in my opinion and the women who do it should be locked behind bars for violating their human rights.


It's my mate's mate, so I don't know him except that he got my mate all p-ssed off today lol. Apparently he tried to be reasonable with his friend who decided to start sh-t with him and even dared to remind him that his wife hasn't exactly proven trustworthy (lol). Yet his mate still doesn't get it, must be a macho thing - or lack of really, probably struggling to somehow prove to everyone he's still a man despite his wife sleeping with everyone including his nephew lol

Hmmm... come to think of it, that's actually possible isn't it? Might have to tell my mate that tomorrow lol



Gaia said:


> Ok I dont understand this whole thing here. Firstly... Yes its wrong for your wives to start crap. With that I agree with. However, this whole bro code thing and choosing between wife or friends is riduclous. You pledged your lives to your wives so imo you should have thier back anyway if things cross the line.


But the problem with that is that at times we end up being unreasonable when our wives become unreasonable. One shouldn't really have one's wife's back for every situation should they? -> my mate's mate for example lol - yes it's extreme but what sparked me thinking about this heh

The wife: "Hey baby I cheated on you 3x and you're stuck raising bastards and your only son is probably also a bastard thanks to your nephew and now I want you to falsely accuse one of your friends of flirting with me, you trust me right?"
:rofl:
And this guy does!
To be honest I find the story rather amusing.



> Secondly... I dont understand why some women try to break up thier spouses long term friendships with other guys in the first place. I think boundaries should be in place from the get go. Now my man has a few friends he knew long before I came into the picture. I may talk to a few on occassion but only when he is around. I have never had any issues with his friends.
> 
> Now I did have to drop a few of my female friends in the past because they became jealous, possesive, competative, irrational, ect. They felt like it was wrong for me to care about his opinion and resorted to labeling him controlling, ect. They were toxic, made me choose between them or him literally and I chose him.
> 
> ...


Most of time as Soulmeetsbody pointed out - it's over BS lol
Oh life... full of its WTF moments


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## Tall Average Guy (Jul 26, 2011)

Gaia said:


> Ok I dont understand this whole thing here. Firstly... Yes its wrong for your wives to start crap. With that I agree with. However, this whole bro code thing and choosing between wife or friends is riduclous(edit: forgot to add imo). You pledged your lives to your wives so imo you should have thier back anyway if things cross the line.
> 
> Secondly... I dont understand why some women try to break up thier spouses long term friendships with other guys in the first place. I think boundaries should be in place from the get go. Now my man has a few friends he knew long before I came into the picture. I may talk to a few on occassion but only when he is around. I have never had any issues with his friends.
> 
> ...


Well sure, if you are going to be reasonable and have a mate that is reasonable, then of course all of this is just silly. But who has that?:scratchhead:

Seriously, yes, it is mostly silly if you have some one you love who wants the best for you. They can be human and make mistakes, but msot of the time these things just won't happen much.


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## ShawnD (Apr 2, 2012)

RandomDude said:


> It makes me wonder really, about the stuff we men tend to do for our SOs, and if it's really necessary. And should we trust our brothers more than our wives? Etc etc... funny how different women fight, some handle things themselves, others like my wife shove the man in front and then declare war lol


This really highlights why politics and democracy never work. Instead of thinking of terms of right and wrong, she's expecting people to take sides based on affiliations. This is my husband so he should take my side even when I'm being retarded! Political party X has an idea but I need to shoot it down simply because I'm not part of that political party!


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## CH (May 18, 2010)

Friend says something stupid that he shouldn't have, apologizes and end of discussion.

Friend does something stupid that he shouldn't have, well if he started it or forced it, someone's getting a beating within an inch of their life.

Friend's wife/gf always looking to start crap to have her man fight for her honor.

B better sit the F down before some of the other wives beat her down. Have had those happen a couple of times, big mouth drunk wife starting crap saying this guy was hitting on me, this guy was trying to make out with me, do something....2 friends apologize to one another and the matter is dropped. BTW, drunk wife(s) never comes around anymore, friend(s) always came solo after that. I almost always go solo because my wife hates watching a bunch of guys drink and talk about the good old days.

And you thought drunk guys were bad, lol. Drunk girls are way meaner IMO, the things they say to each other when mad make us guys look like little girls at times. Women can insult you so bad, you're just speechless.


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Lol hell yeah, I still remember the times when my wife was standing behind me spouting the most vicious venom I've ever heard to this guy while I'm trying to sort things out as calmly and as maturely as possible. Then the guy ends up insulting my wife back then I get p-ssed off as well and then I tell him to back off, and then he doesn't... and then I end up having to get physical to control the situation. All over misunderstandings.

Women... lol. And no my wife doesn't drink much, she just can be mean at times.

@ShawnD

Tell me about it! lol


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## Gaia (Apr 27, 2012)

Tall Average Guy said:


> Well sure, if you are going to be reasonable and have a mate that is reasonable, then of course all of this is just silly. But who has that?:scratchhead:
> 
> Seriously, yes, it is mostly silly if you have some one you love who wants the best for you. They can be human and make mistakes, but msot of the time these things just won't happen much.


I think its silly to me because I dont like conflict and im not very social to begin with. And just because a spouse is reasonable in this area... Doesnt mean they are reasonable in other areas. 

The post about the drunk wife/ gf talking shyt is something I witnessed and I thought the womans behavior was idiotic. Of course I got hell for saying that out loud too... Oops.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Well, if you don't like conflict at all, and this situation doesn't happen in your marriage then obviously your husband shouldn't have to be cautious in this regard heh

Not all wives are like you however


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