# Help...I'm turning into a woman!



## Indy Nial (Sep 26, 2010)

So im in my late 30s, always been laid back and humorous. Got divorced a few years ago which was very very hard to go through. Since then I've dated one person for 9 months but I ended it because she wanted long term and I didn't. 

6 months later I seem to have adopted the emotional state of a woman. I now pine for this girl I dumped, I even told her we couldn't be friends cos it was killing me being around her.

I find myself listening to friggin Adele and a bunch of other crappy love songs. I even watched the Notebook and sobbed like a little girl! 

What's happening to me? Anyone else experienced this?


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## Rushwater (Feb 11, 2013)

You are at that age when your testosterone starts to drop. Maybe you should get it checked.


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## Indy Nial (Sep 26, 2010)

Don't think it's that. ..I often meet up with pam and her 5 sisters ; )


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

You're hanging around too many women perhaps?

I've noticed girly men tend to come from such groups. Hang out with more bros in your social circle, stay away from too many women or you'll get a loose wrist eventually


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## ReformedHubby (Jan 9, 2013)

Could it be that your feelings for this woman were much deeper than you thought? Maybe you were in love with her. That may be why the love songs and romantic movies are effecting you this way. I doubt you would be behaving this way if you were still together.


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## mineforever (Jan 31, 2013)

Sounds like someone might have feelings for the girl... ;-) even if he don't want them. It's kinda a tell tale sign because it's to hard for you to be friends with her.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Indy, first of all: I love your post. So much. It's so lovely! It's adorable.

Equal parts funny, honest, and self-aware.

So... it sounds like you knew you didn't want anything long-term so you were right to end it. You may just experiencing dumper's remorse... that feeling of, What if I made a mistake? But don't focus on the "good" now. Focus on WHY you made that decision. Because it was there for a reason. If you got back with her, would you really want something long-term now? Or no? Maybe you are just sad cause you are single again. 

Better to be honest about what you want/don't want than to string both her and yourself along under false conceptions.

Oh. And there's nothing wrong with listening to Adele or feeling "woman-like." Haha. Emotions are GOOD.


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## Mavash. (Jan 26, 2012)

You think men don't get emotional and pine over women? Evidently you haven't read many posts over in the going through divorce section. LOL


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## ScarletBegonias (Jun 26, 2012)

Jellybeans said:


> Indy, first of all: I love your post. So much. It's so lovely! It's adorable.
> 
> Equal parts funny, honest, and self-aware.
> 
> ...


:iagree::iagree::iagree:


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

This has seriously got to be one of my favorite threads I have ever read on TAM.

:smthumbup:


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## PreRaphaelite (Dec 15, 2012)

Once upon a time men were encouraged to get in touch with their feminine side. Now they're told to get a testosterone shot.


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## Indy Nial (Sep 26, 2010)

> You may just experiencing dumper's remorse... that feeling of, What if I made a mistake? But don't focus on the "good" now. Focus on WHY you made that decision.


That's my problem. ..I just don't know. I ended being friends with her yesterday because it really wasn't helping. 

The thing is when I think about my ex wife - I feel nothing as I was in love with the idea of being in love, she was just a representation of it. Where as with my ex GF I really miss specific things about her personality. 

So now I seem to be sniffing at every film that even hints at some form of sentiment.


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## mablenc (Feb 26, 2013)

Do what you need to do to get through, use a calendar to limit how long. After the experation date, go fishing and drink beer and before you know it, you are back to mans land.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## RandomDude (Dec 18, 2010)

Be warned Indy Nial, this is your future:

Elliot - YouTube

lol


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## sarcasmo (Feb 1, 2013)

Embrace it and find a "handsome" woman to take care of you.


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## Indy Nial (Sep 26, 2010)

I remember that movie! Thankfully i haven't quite got there. ........yet


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

So....having feelings makes you a woman? 

lol. You're just in tune with every side of you. 

Being a man doesn't mean you need to be cold and douchy.


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## marko (Jul 22, 2013)

they say a break up is handled by the brain in a very similar way that a death is. it is just part of the process. it happened, carry on with life.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

Oh you're fine.

It's called a broken heart.

It gets better.


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## Deejo (May 20, 2008)

Roll with it.
Feel the feelings. Take a look at why you felt the way you did when you cut things loose, and why you feel the way you do now that you have ended it.

I think it is very common to re-evaluate and lament once you have ended it.

Uncertainty, fear, loneliness, all of those things can play a role.


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## treyvion (Apr 29, 2013)

Deejo said:


> Roll with it.
> Feel the feelings. Take a look at why you felt the way you did when you cut things loose, and why you feel the way you do now that you have ended it.
> 
> I think it is very common to re-evaluate and lament once you have ended it.
> ...


If you know you did the right thing, especially if it was a abusive situation or a bad situation, you usually feel like you unloaded a bunch of boat anchors.

I think he's not sure about his decision.


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## Deejo (May 20, 2008)

Sure fire way to get over an ex is to focus on finding her replacement.


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## Caribbean Man (Jun 3, 2012)

One of my favourite Adele hits.
Rumour has it - Adele

AdeleVEVO / Adele - Rumor Has It (Official Video) - YouTube


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## Fozzy (Jul 20, 2013)

I have a local rock station on preset 1, and NPR on preset 2.

Balance in all things...


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## waiwera (Sep 8, 2009)

OP - emotions are a human thing...not a woman thing.


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