# So I just saw my ex after 18 months of her walking out on me.



## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

So I am at my son's place and who comes waltzing in after me not seeing her for over 18 months but my ex-wife. She comes in acting civil but feeling entitled (boy you guys are right on this site!). She waltzes in entitled as can be - like nothing happened. then she is civil - then she starts by saying how happy she is, so I said lets get a divorce then....then she says fine but cannot afford $500 lol, excuses. then she goes on to say that her relationship with her AP is none of my business and that our relationship was a dead end for years, then when I mentioned my friend saw her and her ap... she flipped out and said that's creepy and that's why she wanted out for years.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

For a measley $500 file the papers and pay the bill yourself. Stop waiting for her to do it.


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## hookares (Dec 7, 2011)

If you can dump a cheater for $500, you should give somebody a tip three times that amount.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

Why haven't you filed yet?

Geez, get rid of her already


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## bandit.45 (Feb 8, 2012)

If I had a crusty, pus filled growth on my a$$, I think I would pay the $500 to get it cut off. Wouldn't you?


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## Chaparral (Jul 17, 2011)

She doesn't have $500? Sounds like she's doing great. Rotflmao


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## Shaggy (Jul 17, 2011)

Post the OM up on cheaterville.com and suggest that they should find 500 to get rid of you,


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## tom67 (Oct 2, 2012)

bandit.45 said:


> If I had a crusty, pus filled growth on my a$$, I think I would pay the $500 to get it cut off. Wouldn't you?


:iagree::rofl:


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## happyman64 (Jan 12, 2012)

bigtone128 said:


> So I am at my son's place and who comes waltzing in after me not seeing her for over 18 months but my ex-wife. She comes in acting civil but feeling entitled (boy you guys are right on this site!). She waltzes in entitled as can be - like nothing happened. then she is civil - then she starts by saying how happy she is, so I said lets get a divorce then....then she says fine but cannot afford $500 lol, excuses. then she goes on to say that her relationship with her AP is none of my business and that our relationship was a dead end for years, then when I mentioned my friend saw her and her ap... she flipped out and said that's creepy and that's why she wanted out for years.


BT I love you but if my lying, cheating, entitled, narcissistic wife told me she was happy but too broke I would have walked out the door to the nearest ATM, gotten $500.00 and went right back to the kids place.

Then I would have flashed the $500.00 and said this is the first and last time I will ever spend money on a [email protected] but it will be worth it.

I would have hugged my kid and then sat down as if she wasn't event there.

You do realize just how nuts in the head she is right?

Please do not let her set you back.

Divorce her!

HM64


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## tom67 (Oct 2, 2012)

happyman64 said:


> BT I love you but if my lying, cheating, entitled, narcissistic wife told me she was happy but too broke I would have walked out the door to the nearest ATM, gotten $500.00 and went right back to the kids place.
> 
> Then I would have flashed the $500.00 and said this is the first and last time I will ever spend money on a [email protected] but it will be worth it.
> 
> ...


BT show your son you are not to be effed with and to be respected I know they do but put a dagger in this and MOVE ON!


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

So she walks in and starts spewing about how happy she is and how her relationship with her AP is none of "anyone's business". 
That ``no one has a right to talk about it``.......I stated ``I will talk about whatever I want.`` She said `that`s why we are not in a relationship anymore``. Boy she is really on a power trip. Then she really goes on to say `No one has the right to talk about the nature of my relationship with my AP`--- then when I mention my friends saw her at a place - she said `that`s creepy`- I said `creepy like having an affair behind your husband`s back..


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## zookeeper (Oct 2, 2012)

bigtone128 said:


> So she walks in and starts spewing about how happy she is and how her relationship with her AP is none of "anyone's business".
> That ``no one has a right to talk about it``.......I stated ``I will talk about whatever I want.`` She said `that`s why we are not in a relationship anymore``. Boy she is really on a power trip. Then she really goes on to say `No one has the right to talk about the nature of my relationship with my AP`--- then when I mention my friends saw her at a place - she said `that`s creepy`- I said `creepy like having an affair behind your husband`s back..


Step away from the drama and pony up the dough for the divorce. It's the greatest bargain you will ever see.

Stop engaging her, stop trying to get the last word in, etc. it means nothing. She means nothing. So cares who saw her with whom? Let it go. Move on with your life and focus your energy on positive things.


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## happyman64 (Jan 12, 2012)

BT

I know you have honored your vows.

But I truly look forward to you replacing her.

Hopefully with a woman 5-10 years younger than her.

The look on her face will be priceless.

HM


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## Wiserforit (Dec 27, 2012)

Can you explain what the reason is you have not filed for divorce? Not the excuse about her failure to come up with $500. 

Are you going to stay with the status quo forever, or do you have a plan for changing things?


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## ThePheonix (Jan 3, 2013)

bigtone128 said:


> So she walks in and starts spewing about how happy she is and how her relationship with her AP is none of "anyone's business".
> That ``no one has a right to talk about it``.......I stated ``I will talk about whatever I want.`` She said `that`s why we are not in a relationship anymore``. Boy she is really on a power trip. Then she really goes on to say `No one has the right to talk about the nature of my relationship with my AP`--- then when I mention my friends saw her at a place - she said `that`s creepy`- I said `creepy like having an affair behind your husband`s back..


You really don't want to divorce her, do you Dawg? I've got news for you my man; she's moved on. How many ways does she have to tell you there ain't no going back, youre history, it's over, she's with the other guy cause she wants to be. She's not on a power trip. She just doesn't give a rats azz how you feel. (although she probably finds it entertaining to watch you go around chasing you're tail after she pushes the right buttons) Spend the $500 Dawg and put this thing out of its misery.


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## still so sad (May 27, 2013)

*If I had a crusty, pus filled growth on my a$$, I think I would pay the $500 to get it cut off. Wouldn't you?
*
Oh Thank you Bandit45 for that comment. Hillarious!!! Just what I needed to set my day off better!!!!!!

:rofl:


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## Thorburn (Nov 23, 2011)

BT, it is hard following your story when you have started so many threads. I read through them all but I suggest in the future you stick to one thread.

How are the boys and you doing? When I was going through my he*l, my youngest stuck by me and it took a while for my oldest special needs son to come around and he lived with us and cursed me out first thing in the morning and when I got home from work. It was just plain horrible but I just showed him love and he finally came around.

You stated that they said to just let your wife go. Is that still their take on this? Do they see any blame in you? My youngest saw it all as his mother's fault and eventually my oldest did as well.

I know the agony of letting things go. I get from your posts that you seem to hold out some hope of her coming back. I could be wrong here.

Her attitude is that she has found mister wonderful and has moved on. Things could go South for her and she could come running back but I don't see it.

I would focus on the boys, get the money for the D and move on.


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

Wiserforit said:


> Can you explain what the reason is you have not filed for divorce? Not the excuse about her failure to come up with $500.
> 
> Are you going to stay with the status quo forever, or do you have a plan for changing things?


Well we live in different provinces (Canada) and in Canada they have this stupid rule you have to wait 1 year before filing for divorce. And then the other party has to agree or it gets costly....frankly don't have the money to contest her all the way.


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

happyman64 said:


> BT I love you but if my lying, cheating, entitled, narcissistic wife told me she was happy but too broke I would have walked out the door to the nearest ATM, gotten $500.00 and went right back to the kids place.
> 
> Then I would have flashed the $500.00 and said this is the first and last time I will ever spend money on a [email protected] but it will be worth it.
> 
> ...


Thanks Happy - Oh I see how crazy she is... no doubt.
I will divorce her (But our boys keep saying "spend the money elsewhere".


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

bigtone128 said:


> Well we live in different provinces (Canada) and in Canada they have this stupid rule you have to wait 1 year before filing for divorce. And then the other party has to agree or it gets costly....frankly don't have the money to contest her all the way.


That sounds like a lame excuse. File, and see what happens. She may not contest it. And since it's been 18 months, there's no longer a reason to wait.


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## disconnected (May 30, 2013)

happyman64 said:


> BT I love you but if my lying, cheating, entitled, narcissistic wife told me she was happy but too broke I would have walked out the door to the nearest ATM, gotten $500.00 and went right back to the kids place.
> 
> Then I would have flashed the $500.00 and said this is the first and last time I will ever spend money on a [email protected] but it will be worth it.
> 
> ...


Ha ha ... classic. Oh yeah ... do it!!:rofl:


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

Thorburn said:


> BT, it is hard following your story when you have started so many threads. I read through them all but I suggest in the future you stick to one thread.
> 
> How are the boys and you doing? When I was going through my he*l, my youngest stuck by me and it took a while for my oldest special needs son to come around and he lived with us and cursed me out first thing in the morning and when I got home from work. It was just plain horrible but I just showed him love and he finally came around.
> 
> ...


K the thing with my ex is she is like david copperfield the great illusionist - what you see is not what you see. She is living with her AP but telling them - "It is not what it appears - it is only a living arrangement" then when my son comes home for the summer she gets him a room by himself so he would not live with her to find the truth about her and him. 

So she tries to be good to my sons to keep hidden in the background about her and him. And I have to constantly confront them with the truth. For example, just the other day my son says to me "You do not know what is going on." Then I say to him "Well what about the sex songs she posted on facebook when she first moved in with him." To which he replied "Yea that is pretty messed up." But she constantly is telling them it is not true.....and I constantly have to pull them into the truth.


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## Thorburn (Nov 23, 2011)

bigtone128 said:


> K the thing with my ex is she is like david copperfield the great illusionist - what you see is not what you see. She is living with her AP but telling them - "It is not what it appears - it is only a living arrangement" then when my son comes home for the summer she gets him a room by himself so he would not live with her to find the truth about her and him.
> 
> So she tries to be good to my sons to keep hidden in the background about her and him. And I have to constantly confront them with the truth. For example, just the other day my son says to me "You do not know what is going on." Then I say to him "Well what about the sex songs she posted on facebook when she first moved in with him." To which he replied "Yea that is pretty messed up." But she constantly is telling them it is not true.....and I constantly have to pull them into the truth.


My youngest son was involved in exposing my wife, his mother in 2011. He knew something was going on before I did and he put a GPS unit on her car. She apologized to us all and we went into a false R for over a year. In Feb. of this year I put a VAR in her car and recorded her having sex with the XOM three times. When I exposed it my wife denied everything and my son asked me for the recording as he told me, "Mom has be almost convinced that you are nuts and that she did not do anything". So, I sent him a portion of her having sex and he went off on his mother and it took months before he would speak to her and now their relationship which was great in the past is limping along. He really came to my support and is slowly coming around. For me to prove to my son it took him hearing her having sex. I still hate that I had to do that but he is 26 and he wanted the whole thing. I only sent him a brief portion which was horrible enough. In addition my wife's family was in denial about it and my son told me to send it to him and he will set the family straight. He did. He told them that it was his mother and another guy. 

It is amazing the denial that is going on in your family. Here she is, she left, she is living with a guy and hiding it in some aspects, and in other aspects being open about it. The boys have conflicted loyalties. One thing I did through the entire ordeal is tell the boys to continue to love their mother, no matter what she.


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## workindad (May 7, 2011)

Dude 500 bucks is a steal to get rid of that woman. Do it as fast as you can. Pull the band aid off
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## thatbpguy (Dec 24, 2012)

bigtone128 said:


> Well we live in different provinces (Canada) and in Canada they have this stupid rule you have to wait 1 year before filing for divorce. And then the other party has to agree or it gets costly....frankly don't have the money to contest her all the way.


In that case I would take the necessary steps to protect your assets and whatever else is necessary to protect yourself. 

And do place both of them on Cheaterville (not that I think much of that site) and make sure she knows it's there. Maybe even start a blog about it all...... Call it, "How To Screw Men Behind Your Husband's Back" and post pics, emails... of the two of them. Make sure they know about it and post it's existance on FB... so that friends and family know about it. 

She if she finds that amusing.


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## thatbpguy (Dec 24, 2012)

bandit.45 said:


> If I had a crusty, pus filled growth on my a$$, I think I would pay the $500 to get it cut off. Wouldn't you?


Now _that_ was some funny words right there!

Also true.


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## ThePheonix (Jan 3, 2013)

bigtone128 said:


> So she tries to be good to my sons to keep hidden in the background about her and him. And I have to constantly confront them with the truth. For example, just the other day my son says to me "You do not know what is going on." Then I say to him "Well what about the sex songs she posted on facebook when she first moved in with him." To which he replied "Yea that is pretty messed up." But she constantly is telling them it is not true.....and I constantly have to pull them into the truth.


Your sons must not be the sharpest tools in shed. Besides, what's this got to do with whether you divorce her? You're crawfishing Dawg. If you don't have the wherewithal to do what you need to do, just say so. Blaming your kids ain't fooling a lot of people.


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## clipclop2 (Aug 16, 2013)

She doesn't have the money to contest either. 

Here is what you get for that $500: The self-respect derived from doing what needs to be done as any strong man would do. Be a "can do" man. Trust yourself enough to take a leap of faith. Don't have to tell potential mates how you were afraid to divorce your lying, cheating wife because of $500 and the fact that you live in (Oh!) Canada. Talk about an invitation to see you as a man of excuses instead of a man of action.

Sometimes I think TAM should seek donations and provide grants for people who truly need financial help. That'd be a lot of fun to manage!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

Wiserforit said:


> Can you explain what the reason is you have not filed for divorce? Not the excuse about her failure to come up with $500.


Good question.




bigtone128 said:


> I will divorce her (But our boys keep saying "spend the money elsewhere".


Bad answer. 



ThePheonix said:


> You really don't want to divorce her


Correct answer.


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## sinnister (Dec 5, 2010)

This is hard to read.

OP - you have to stay above the BS. You shouldn't have to worry about this sorry excuse for an ex-wife. Why bother.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

So, let's see... She wants a new relationship with her new man, but not really! 

Why does she have to hide it from her children? Weird!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## toonaive (Dec 13, 2012)

I would go ahead and file. Then see what happens. You never know. She may want it also. 500 bucks later, your done. I don't know your full story, but seriously, is there anything to fight for? Minor children? Asset? Property? If you are paying for anything in her life living away from you, stop it! If she has been self sufficient all this time. That makes things easier for you. Wish my divorce would have been that easy to get started. Then again, Im in SC. So, thanks to bible belt, adultery is an automatic slam dunk against alimony.


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

MattMatt said:


> Why does she have to hide it from her children? Weird!
> _Posted via Mobile Device_



I think we all know why: bigtone is *Plan B*, the backup plan, so that she can come home in case things go bad with OM. 

And that's her real excuse for not filing either, and her attempts to hide the affair from everyone. 

bigtone seems to also be waiting out the affair.

Talk about living in limbo.


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

lordmayhem said:


> I think we all know why: bigtone is *Plan B*, the backup plan, so that she can come home in case things go bad with OM.
> 
> And that's her real excuse for not filing either, and her attempts to hide the affair from everyone.
> 
> ...


not really LM - I'm living my life with no desire to be with her.....frankly she disgusts me. 

It amazes me just how she thinks she can fool everyone.....fascinating.


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

Thorburn said:


> he told me, "Mom has be almost convinced that you are nuts and that she did not do anything". So, I sent him a portion of her having sex and he went off on his mother and it took months before he would speak to her and now their relationship which was great in the past is limping along. He really came to my support and is slowly coming around. For me to prove to my son it took him hearing her having sex. I still hate that I had to do that but he is 26 and he wanted the whole thing. I only sent him a brief portion which was horrible enough. In addition my wife's family was in denial about it and my son told me to send it to him and he will set the family straight. He did. He told them that it was his mother and another guy.
> 
> It is amazing the denial that is going on in your family. Here she is, she left, she is living with a guy and hiding it in some aspects, and in other aspects being open about it. The boys have conflicted loyalties. One thing I did through the entire ordeal is tell the boys to continue to love their mother, no matter what she.


So true - she waltzes in here like nothing has gone on and says "Im living with him but no one knows the nature of our relationship"....to which I replied "So all those sex songs you posted on facebook and you living with the guy...are you sleeping in separate beds?" to which she replied "I do not have to answer to you - I lived in an oppressive relationship for over 25 years and that's why I am not anymore" so I replied - it would only be oppressive if you wanted to do other things....

My youngest son told me later he was proud of me - she was mostly upset ironically about cheaterville - she stated - what a dirty trick to play - that was low.....much like cheating....exposure hurts.


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

bigtone128 said:


> not really LM - I'm living my life with no desire to be with her.....frankly she disgusts me.
> 
> It amazes me just how she thinks she can fool everyone.....fascinating.


You say so, but I think deep down you really don't, otherwise you would have made the move. It's been half a year since the dorr has been open, yet neither of you have made the final move to end the marriage. So really, you're both just separated while she bangs the OM. 

And it seems to me and others, that you're using the boys as an excuse not to move forward with the D. Look, its natural for them to be in denial, and their mother's infidelity is traumatic for them, they seriously don't want to believe that their mother is like that. They're probably clinging to the belief that their mother will come home after just being separated from you for a while. And since you won't file, it just reinforces that. 

If you are indeed disgusted and don't want to be with her, then you'll file and help your boys accept the situation. It also lets her know that you are NOT Plan B or anyone else's backup plan. Its probably one of the reasons she dropped by, to rub the affair in your face (which she just did) and see if you're still the back up plan, which you confirmed to her by not filing for divorce. So she gets to have her cake and eat it too. She could have filed for D if she really wanted to, and OM could have helped her if he really wanted to also. But why buy the whole cow when you get the milk for free?

Show her you aren't anyone's backup plan and blow up and expose the affair to everyone by filing for D and naming the OM in the divorce filing.


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

bigtone128 said:


> she replied "I do not have to answer to you - I lived in an oppressive relationship for over 25 years and that's why I am not anymore" so I replied - it would only be oppressive if you wanted to do other things....


How much longer are you going to take her rubbing the affair in your face?


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

bigtone128 said:


> So true - she waltzes in here like nothing has gone on and says "Im living with him but no one knows the nature of our relationship"....to which I replied "So all those sex songs you posted on facebook and you living with the guy...are you sleeping in separate beds?" to which she replied "I do not have to answer to you - I lived in an oppressive relationship for over 25 years and that's why I am not anymore" so I replied - it would only be oppressive if you wanted to do other things....


You obviously still crave the drama and interaction with her.

Otherwise you wouldn't engage her with this back and forth childish nonsense, and post it word for word on this forum. Some day you'll get to a place where you won't care what she says and does and you'll realize you have much better things to do then the back and forth with her over your relationship issues.



bigtone128 said:


> My youngest son told me later he was proud of me.


He'd be more proud of you if you initiated a divorce. That sends the strongest message.

Even if he doesn't say it.


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## bbird1 (May 22, 2011)

bigtone128 said:


> So I am at my son's place and who comes waltzing in after me not seeing her for over 18 months but my ex-wife. She comes in acting civil but feeling entitled (boy you guys are right on this site!). She waltzes in entitled as can be - like nothing happened. then she is civil - then she starts by saying how happy she is, so I said lets get a divorce then....then she says fine but cannot afford $500 lol, excuses. then she goes on to say that her relationship with her AP is none of my business and that our relationship was a dead end for years, then when I mentioned my friend saw her and her ap... she flipped out and said that's creepy and that's why she wanted out for years.


pay the 500 yourself and watch her squirm.

File abandonment charges and because of her flip out file a restraining order for a whopping 50 bucks. Get a free consultation from every D lawyer in town because if they consulted you they can not accept her. make this hard for her and watch as she decides maybe your relationship isn't dead. Just don't take her cheating arse back.


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## Wiserforit (Dec 27, 2012)

bigtone128 said:


> Well we live in different provinces (Canada) and in Canada they have this stupid rule you have to wait 1 year before filing for divorce. And then the other party has to agree or it gets costly....frankly don't have the money to contest her all the way.


You just said that the reason was she didn't have $500, not that she would contest.

So your answers are contradictory. Look how you are not fooling anyone here. You aren't fooling your son either. 

Relishing the drama instead of moving on.


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

Wiserforit said:


> You just said that the reason was she didn't have $500, not that she would contest.
> 
> So your answers are contradictory. Look how you are not fooling anyone here. You aren't fooling your son either.
> 
> Relishing the drama instead of moving on.


Where'd you get off talking to me like that......
I'm not trying to fool anyone....
Not relishing the drama, just felt an obligation to let people who helped me know what was going on....
Honestly, where do you get off...


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

you know nothing about my circumstances nor do I feel the need to explain myself to you and anyone else.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

bigtone128 said:


> Not relishing the drama, just felt an obligation to let people who helped me know what was going on....


Do you really think the people that have helped you here are interested in reading about the silly squabbles between you and your wife?

The people that have helped you here would like you to spend a measly $500 and get this woman out of your life and put her and all the drama behind you.


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

lenzi said:


> Do you really think the people that have helped you here are interested in reading about the silly squabbles between you and your wife?
> 
> The people that have helped you here would like you to spend a measly $500 and get this woman out of your life and put her and all the drama behind you.


Well if you are not interested move on.....I know the people who have helped me on this site since last year and yes I do value their opinion. 

Listen I have not seen a woman that I spent 30 years with for 2 years - for 2 years - and then I bumped into her and thought I owed it to the people who helped me through last year to know what is going on....if you aren't interested or cannot be helpful move on and quit trolling for trouble. 

This site has been very helpful to me - not by people like yourself.

Move on with your self-righteous arrogance to someone else's post. Thank you.


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## Chaparral (Jul 17, 2011)

If I remember correctly you can speed up the divorce in Canada if adultery is involved.


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

Chaparral said:


> If I remember correctly you can speed up the divorce in Canada if adultery is involved.


Chap - I checked into that - that is if the other person agrees to the affair - not happening here.....spoke to lawyer saying it would take well over the year to prove the affair so it is best and less costly to wait.


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## Wiserforit (Dec 27, 2012)

bigtone128 said:


> Where'd you get off talking to me like that......
> I'm not trying to fool anyone....
> Not relishing the drama, just felt an obligation to let people who helped me know what was going on....
> Honestly, where do you get off...


I went through the same thing with a cheating wife, as have so many here. You are posting on an internet help forum with us, so the supreme irony is you lashing out at people who know what they're talking about. 

Look at that hateful reaction of yours. You have an anger management problem. You aren't getting most people here to jump on the hate parade bandwagon because we know better.

You have a son that is comforting you rather than vice-versa, with him saying he feels proud of you in order to soothe your hurt. You need to be the tower of confidence and secure calm in rough seas.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

bigtone128 said:


> if you aren't interested or cannot be helpful move on and quit trolling for trouble.
> 
> This site has been very helpful to me - not by people like yourself.


Just because advice might not be something you're ready, willing and able to listen to doesn't make it bad advice.

I AM trying to help you. By trying to get you to realize it's foolish and self destructive to stay in a marriage to a woman you're no longer involved with, who has another man in her life.

When you say things like "I'd be divorced but she doesn't have enough money to do it" or "She'll contest it" or "we have to wait longer" which are obviously just excuses, and you go to a lot of time and effort posting the transcripts of your meaningless arguments, I feel that someone has to point out to you that you're exhibiting a fair amount of denial.

I'll do you one better. I'll ask the question which you haven't.

Is anyone who is posting on this thread interested in reading about the arguments that he has with his wife?


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## Wiserforit (Dec 27, 2012)

bigtone128 said:


> self-righteous arrogance


The individual is directed to look in the mirror. 

What we said hurt you. So you lashed out. That is how you deal with hurt. VERY obvious.

You asked for advice. Then jumped all over people who did not give you what you wanted to hear. This is a symptom of a personality defect you need to change: the inability to take criticism, even when you know it is correct. 

It makes me a better person to hear where I need to make improvements, and I am grateful for it.


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

*Re: Re: So I just saw my ex after 18 months of her walking out on me.*



Chaparral said:


> If I remember correctly you can speed up the divorce in Canada if adultery is involved.


Yes, the 1 year waiting period would be waived if she admits to the adultery. Even if she wont admit to it, the 1 yr waiting period was over 6 months ago.


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

*Re: Re: So I just saw my ex after 18 months of her walking out on me.*



bigtone128 said:


> Chap - I checked into that - that is if the other person agrees to the affair - not happening here.....spoke to lawyer saying it would take well over the year to prove the affair so it is best and less costly to wait.


Wait for what? The 1 year waiting period is over. She doesnt have to admit to the adultery anymore. You can divorce her normally now without having to prove adultery.


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## ThePheonix (Jan 3, 2013)

lenzi said:


> Is anyone who is posting on this thread interested in reading about the arguments that he has with his wife?


It painful to hear how she bulldogs him like a calf at the Calgary Stampede. Plus hearing about the arguments is a piss poor substitute for showing the TAM members he doesn't have to guts to cashier this gal.


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## Ovid (Oct 11, 2012)

mow 100 lawns, or shovel 100 driveways at 5 bucks a pop if you have to. Get a workout and remove a nasty growth on your @$$ all at the same time.


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

Wiserforit said:


> Look at that hateful reaction of yours. You have an anger management problem.


Hmm - you didn't know what tone I rote it in AND you can diagnose with one posting.....wow - egotistical and talented..


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

lenzi said:


> Is anyone who is posting on this thread interested in reading about the arguments that he has with his wife?


#1 - it is my thread.
#2 - if you are NOT interested - move on..
quit trolling.
Move on....I have legitimate friends on this site.


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## dymo (Jan 2, 2012)

bigtone128 said:


> Chap - I checked into that - that is if the other person agrees to the affair - not happening here.....spoke to lawyer saying it would take well over the year to prove the affair so it is best and less costly to wait.


A little confused. You haven't seen her in 2 years. Is the 1 year waiting time up yet? If not, how long do you have left to go?

And are you in a position to pay for the divorce?


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## BetrayedAgain7 (Apr 27, 2013)

I know nothing of your history with your ex bigtone. But one thing I can see is that you still have an emotional hose attached to her. Big time.


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## happyman64 (Jan 12, 2012)

I do not think BT has ever said he does not have an emotional attachment to his STBXW still.

They have known each other for a very long time.

IMO I think BT is still wondering why his wife was and is not able to be honest with him....

I think BT will never get that answer.

And she will never honestly answer any of his questions when she still feels he cares.

BT has focused on himself and his boys. That is obvious from his earlier posts.

BT from one Dad to another when this happens


> "But she constantly is telling them it is not true.....and I constantly have to pull them into the truth. "


 you should remind them that you did not raise them to be naïve.

This will make them think and help them in their future relationships.

Do you still go to your vacation home? Or is it your wifes'?

HM64


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## Thorburn (Nov 23, 2011)

BT - I read all your threads, that was the hard part, you having so many. I got your story.

D her and get this over with. Your wife threatened you and you moved. Your wife shows up and you go into all this drama. You are clinging to a woman that you call your wife in some posts and your ex in others. Stop being so dam* conflicted. Stop clinging to the hope of wanting a family with this woman. You have not move on. You have not given up. 

I read all your posts and you go back and forth and have done so for so long now it is painful to see you doing this to yourself.

You get upset that she wished you a happy b-day and then you write that you sent her b-day greetings prior to this. Then you question her motive. Stop this non-sense for your own good. 

Your boys know the story. I suspect they know more then you do about the AP, the reasons, etc. And I suspect they want things to work out for you and your wife/ex and are still conflicted about how this will all turn out.

You stated that you go to church and that the Bible states that adultery is grounds for D. You have your justification from a moral point, a religious point and from a legal point. 


Stop engaging her. Focus on your boys, help them through school. Don't bring up their mother to them. Disengage from her. File for D and end this. It makes no sense that she can't get $500.00 and I don't even want to focus on that, because it does not matter. She is lying and more then likely has the money, she does not care. She has moved on and D is not important to her. She is living her life without you and D does not matter one way or the other. In her mind she is saying why spend any money for a D when I am living my life the way I want to live it, my husband left, and I don't care.

Honestly, why should she spend the money on D. You are not giving her any reason to do so.


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

dymo said:


> A little confused. You haven't seen her in 2 years. Is the 1 year waiting time up yet? If not, how long do you have left to go?
> 
> And are you in a position to pay for the divorce?


There you go - without going into detail - EVERY lawyer I have seen wants a ton of money to settle this - to be frank - I have very little. I spend whatever extra I have on my children. 

What people do not understand is I have no desire to see her be with her, moved 1000 miles away from her for a year... 

I know myself well enough and have read enough stories on here on reconciliation that I could not deal with the mind movies, the images of her being with someone else, etc. to ever consider reconciling. For me (and I respect those who chose otherwise), the pain for the ultimate gain would not be worth it.

A lifetime of bad memories for a little better relationship. I have come to the conclusion.

I ask myself - even if she came back as good as gold and was perfect, in the back of my mind I'd be saying "She's just being nice because of what she did and she is biding her time to do it again." 

Better off being someone I trust (even though I do not trust too many people anymore) - than to be constantly vigilant of being hurt again by the same person.


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

How to get a legal divorce in Canada | Divorce information | Divorce forms


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

lordmayhem said:


> How to get a legal divorce in Canada | Divorce information | Divorce forms


Thanks Lord - have them, done them. 

Takes $1,000 to file (do not have it), then to have her served another $300, AND that's if it is not contested.

I am making ends meet right now - 2 kids in university where I put any extra money. It'll get done - right now just trying to get my own house in order - careerwise and financially.


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

At least change the locks and don't allow her to simply walk into your home as if she owns it. Change your phone numbers too if she has them.


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

lordmayhem said:


> At least change the locks and don't allow her to simply walk into your home as if she owns it. Change your phone numbers too if she has them.


Maybe you misunderstood my previous post - I was at my son's apartment (where we both have keys) when she came prancing in... like I said, haven't seen her in 18 months, moved 1,000 miles away from her, doesn't matter.

One thing I have learned - Relationships are like organisms - quit feeding them, they die of themselves.

Oh yea, doesn't have my phone number, nor me hers, don't know where she lives. don't care. I know she does live with her AP but it is irrelevant other than ensuring my kids know the truth about it.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

bigtone128 said:


> Thanks Lord - have them, done them.
> 
> Takes $1,000 to file (do not have it), then to have her served another $300, AND that's if it is not contested.
> 
> I am making ends meet right now - 2 kids in university where I put any extra money. It'll get done - right now just trying to get my own house in order - careerwise and financially.


Ok I understand now. You'd divorce her if you could but you can't scrape together $1300 to get the ball rolling. 

Sorry for my comments earlier. I thought you were still very into her since you started a thread going into very specific details of a meaningless random conversation you had with her and you were looking for comments and feedback in that regard but in fact you were only posting that to update all the helpful posters who are interested in spending their valuable time reading paragraphs full of useless squabbles.

If you don't have that relatively small amount of extra money then you've got much bigger problems then being married to a cheater who you only see on rare occasion. I hope your financial situation improves. You'll be happier, less stressed and probably have a better attitude about life in general.


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## Squeakr (May 1, 2013)

lenzi said:


> If you don't have that relatively small amount of extra money then you've got much bigger problems then being married to a cheater who you only see on rare occasion. I hope your financial situation improves. You'll be happier, less stressed and probably have a better attitude about life in general.



To some people not having a boatload of extra cash is not the end all be all. Just because someone doesn't have scads of money laying around, doesn't meant that they have a ton of problems due to that. IF one is paying their bills and debt free otherwise, does it really matter if they have lots of cash laying around. It will make retirement hard, but doesn't mean that they have lots of other/ bigger/ worse problems. Some of us are making it despite the economy and the hand dealt to us within life.


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

EleGirl said:


> Why haven't you filed yet?
> 
> Geez, get rid of her already


Why would one wait 18 months and not have completed the divorce by now?

$1300 .. GMAFB


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## Entropy3000 (May 11, 2011)

bigtone128 said:


> So true - she waltzes in here like nothing has gone on and says "Im living with him but no one knows the nature of our relationship"....to which I replied "So all those sex songs you posted on facebook and you living with the guy...are you sleeping in separate beds?" to which she replied "I do not have to answer to you - I lived in an oppressive relationship for over 25 years and that's why I am not anymore" so I replied - it would only be oppressive if you wanted to do other things....
> 
> My youngest son told me later he was proud of me - she was mostly upset ironically about cheaterville - she stated - what a dirty trick to play - that was low.....much like cheating....exposure hurts.


If you had moved on you would not be posting here. You are letting yourself be all about the drama. 

Stop. Divorce. Move on. No need to even worry about the drama.


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

lenzi said:


> Ok I understand now. You'd divorce her if you could but you can't scrape together $1300 to get the ball rolling.
> 
> Sorry for my comments earlier. I thought you were still very into her since you started a thread going into very specific details of a meaningless random conversation you had with her and you were looking for comments and feedback in that regard but in fact you were only posting that to update all the helpful posters who are interested in spending their valuable time reading paragraphs full of useless squabbles.
> 
> If you don't have that relatively small amount of extra money then you've got much bigger problems then being married to a cheater who you only see on rare occasion. I hope your financial situation improves. You'll be happier, less stressed and probably have a better attitude about life in general.


Thank you---I bought up the divorce with my boys and they stated "We would prefer you spend the money on our university rather than a divorce which will happen anyway."


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

Entropy3000 said:


> Why would one wait 18 months and not have completed the divorce by now?
> 
> $1300 .. GMAFB


May not be a lot to you - but it is a ton to me right now - once again - don't need your judgment...


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

Frankly, I am happy being alone.... no stress, no one pushing me to purchase things I cannot afford. I live a simple life now without the added stress of her wanting more....


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

lenzi said:


> Do you really think the people that have helped you here are interested in reading about the silly squabbles between you and your wife?
> 
> The people that have helped you here would like you to spend a measly $500 and get this woman out of your life and put her and all the drama behind you.


Lenzi, don't presume to think or speak for me. OK?


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## ThePheonix (Jan 3, 2013)

bigtone128 said:


> Thank you---I bought up the divorce with my boys and they stated "*We would prefer you spend the money on our university *rather than a divorce which will happen anyway."


You've got a hell of a supporting couple of kids there Dawg. When it come to your money and your well being, its like my uncle would say, "looks like the kids took after their mother".


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

bigtone128 said:


> Thanks Lord - have them, done them.
> 
> Takes $1,000 to file (do not have it), then to have her served another $300, AND that's if it is not contested.
> 
> I am making ends meet right now - 2 kids in university where I put any extra money. It'll get done - right now just trying to get my own house in order - careerwise and financially.


I can sympathize. My oldest is in college and its killing us right now.


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

bigtone128 said:


> Maybe you misunderstood my previous post - I was at my son's apartment (where we both have keys) when she came prancing in... like I said, haven't seen her in 18 months, moved 1,000 miles away from her, doesn't matter.
> 
> One thing I have learned - Relationships are like organisms - quit feeding them, they die of themselves.
> 
> Oh yea, doesn't have my phone number, nor me hers, don't know where she lives. don't care. I know she does live with her AP but it is irrelevant other than ensuring my kids know the truth about it.


Sounds like you have pretty much NC with her and she basically surprised you all at your son's apartment. Then you are pretty much divorced except for the paperwork. 

I know even back in January you were thinking of R with her.

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/coping-infidelity/66281-i-am-considering-taking-her-back-am-i-crazy-concerned-my-son.html



bigtone128 said:


> Hello folks - I do not know if anyone went through this or not - but my youngest son is going through terrible emotions (which I knew would come) such as fear of future, etc. He told me that he feels he doesnt have a home anymore - which is true and I see the toll this has left on him...he was so resilient before all this happened and now he is not as much. Which has left me wanting to protect him and has got me considering taing her back (if she were to ever ask). I would do anything for my children and this would be one of them. I think about getting back with her and I know it would be awkward but I believe we could work together for our kids to get them through college. I think about it and I do not believe I would ever be able to let her touch me again (because the triggers would just be too much to take). But I think it would really help our children. I do not know of anybody who has tried it, but seems it could work i dk.....I always hold out hope we could work together for the sake of our children...I know it sounds crazy but I would certainly consider it. Thoughts..


Your sons are 18 and 20 years old - adults in college. It's not like they are at a young age, they're old enough to handle and accept this. But that was from your thread back on January 27, eight months ago. I certainly hope that you're past that stage and are not waiting out the affair. If you've fully detached from her as you say, then that's wonderful. 



bigtone128 said:


> heres the odd thing..... we had a summer home which I vacated after the split.....and my boys just came from it and told me EVERYTHING is the same in it... my books are still there, other writings, etc. it is odd she would not remove all my stuff...
> makes no sense at all....it has been 18 months....and she never talks about her boyfriend with her family yet everyone knows about it? weird....


You mentioned that you had a summer home. Have you ever thought of selling it to pay for the divorce?


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## ing (Mar 26, 2011)

Hey guys. 
Give the guy a break. He was married to this woman for 30 years. It does not all end with a piece of paper and good intentions, 
Their lives are so entwined at that point that everything you do. Make a cake, fix your car, buy a light bulb has memories an stories that they shared together. Everything

I think that Bigtone got "caught" by her, and believe me, her turning up was no accident, he showed as much strength this time as he did to accept that a 30 year investment had just gone down the pan and choose to end the relationship. 
Sure, it dragged on, but it is all relative. If you are in a 12 month relationship you would probably not be fully over it in a month?
10 years about a year to recover?
20 years?

How about 30 years.. How long do we reckon that will take?

It is incredibly hard to see a person you loved longer than anyone else on the planet being filthy and vile in front of you, and to you. 

I think he exercised admirable self restraint!

I also know the disastrous financial consequences of Divorce after that amount of time . It truly decimates everything you ever worked for, believed in and every scrap of saving goes. 
Reset to zero is optimistic.

Moving a 1000 miles away and restarting his life is not something that should be sniffed at. It has taken me 2.5 years to get back to a point where maybe, just maybe I am getting out of the hole and I can begin to plan again.

Nice to hear from you dude. Bet you were glad to be going home!


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## LongWalk (Apr 4, 2013)

BT,

You started too many threads, but TAM has this filing system that has its pluses and minuses. A woman whose blind musician husband became depressed after he could not protect her when they were mugged posted in CWI. People came back and asked why in CWI? "There was no infidelity here."

She replied that she knew people would respond in CWI because it attracted a lot of readers. Smart cookie.

It was sad to read people criticizing you for failing to D. That opinion could be valid but they did not always read the facts. For example, you met your ex at your son's place. You handled those posters firmly.

I can't remember who it was MattMatt or HappyMan who observed that your wife went way out of her way to treat you with cruelty. And this behavior made her especially unsuitable for reconciliation or even co-parenting civility. Understandably, you are mystified by the bile she spews.

She is not in good enough shape to explain her thinking to you. Don't look forward to enlightenment from her side. Perhaps you can explain her better yourself and share your thoughts with your sons for their sake. They must be wondering, too.

WW and WAW cook up a dislike-the-man-they-cheat-on-or-leave soup. It can contain legitimate objections. Let's face it not every spouse, husband or wife, is without faults. Some have more than others.

However, when the facts are so grossly distorted, as in the case of your wife, then you can only concluded that her own mind is a mess. It was fragile before the affair and she came unhinged.

Her ability to feel empathy must always have been weak. That ability atrophied further when she depended on lies to justify her behavior. POSOM must be damaged profoundly himself. Otherwise, how could he enjoy your wife's company, I mean, she must be very ornery all the time, living with shame and embarrassment. Guilt she feels some, but remorse little.

Hope you are able to limit any damage she can cause to your finances. Since you are not anxious to get into a new relationship, you can afford to wait. Let her live in sin or pay to get out.

Don't give up the idea of dating. Just play it by ear.

If the CV post still exists, please PM the link to me.


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## Hoosier (May 17, 2011)

BT,
I am now two years divorced from a 30 year marriage, so I can relate.
Unlike you, when it became clear that my x was not interested in R, I immediately started D. Because my laws are evidently different from yours I was able to be divorced in 82 days, and it still sucks. I read once that "limbo sucks the soul dry". And limbo is where you are at. The 1000 miles between you is great, ihave 5 blocks....but to really start to heal I think you need to find the money. As it is, you are still closer to her than I am my x! Detach! 
I think you handled the confrontation well, don't worry about that. And while I have had hundreds of mental conversation with her, telling her exactly what I thought, in reality they would be as useful as talking to the wall, so don't worry about missed opportunities. 
Here's praying for you to find the courage to cut her out, stop the cancer from growing within you. I know it's tough, the wounds will be open for a long while, but start the process, find a way, you can do it.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Either some of the posters on TAM are incredibly wealthy or they reside on Fantasy Island.

"Yah! Just hire a PI!" "File for divorce! It'll be the best £/$xxxxx you ever spent!"

If the BS has money for a PI or to file for divorce, they'd have probably done it already.

No offence folks, and yes, if all things were equal yes, hiring a PI and instructing a solicitor or a lawyer to file for divorce would be an excellent idea, but often that's not possible as many WS spend like drunken sailors. And there's no spare money left.


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## Kallan Pavithran (Jan 17, 2012)

MattMatt said:


> Either some of the posters on TAM are incredibly wealthy or they reside on Fantasy Island.
> 
> "Yah! Just hire a PI!" "File for divorce! It'll be the best £/$xxxxx you ever spent!"
> 
> ...




I agree with you matt but my question is if you have a tumor and it costs 1300$ to remove it, wont you do it some how?

He is living in limbo for two yrs, I think he should move on with his life and find someone who will be there for him till his end.How can he do it if he is not D?

Like many TAM members feels, I too feel that he is dragging the inevitable in the hope that she will come back. 

She is not filing for D not because she cant arrange 500$ but she didnt wanted throw away her safety net. I think her AP is not sure about marrying her.


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## Hardtohandle (Jan 10, 2013)

workindad said:


> Dude 500 bucks is a steal to get rid of that woman. Do it as fast as you can. Pull the band aid off
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Cost me almost 10k we only had one lawyer and no court time..


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## Vulcan2013 (Sep 25, 2013)

It would be the best $500 you've ever spent.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Vulcan2013 said:


> It would be the best $500 you've ever spent.


Only if that $500 exists to be spent.


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

Hoosier said:


> BT,
> I am now two years divorced from a 30 year marriage, so I can relate.
> Unlike you, when it became clear that my x was not interested in R, I immediately started D. Because my laws are evidently different from yours I was able to be divorced in 82 days, and it still sucks. I read once that "limbo sucks the soul dry". And limbo is where you are at. The 1000 miles between you is great, ihave 5 blocks....but to really start to heal I think you need to find the money. As it is, you are still closer to her than I am my x! Detach!
> I think you handled the confrontation well, don't worry about that. And while I have had hundreds of mental conversation with her, telling her exactly what I thought, in reality they would be as useful as talking to the wall, so don't worry about missed opportunities.
> Here's praying for you to find the courage to cut her out, stop the cancer from growing within you. I know it's tough, the wounds will be open for a long while, but start the process, find a way, you can do it.


Thanks for your response - I realize now she had a problem with empathy. When I was with her she had it towards me and little towards others - I had moments of clarity where I would wonder if it was ever coming my way. I guess that time has come.


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

MattMatt said:


> Either some of the posters on TAM are incredibly wealthy or they reside on Fantasy Island.
> 
> "Yah! Just hire a PI!" "File for divorce! It'll be the best £/$xxxxx you ever spent!"
> 
> ...


Thanks MattMatt


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

bigtone128 said:


> Thanks MattMatt


You're most welcome, mate.


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

So I was driving down the road last week and got rear-ended and broke the C-5 vertebrate in my neck....having numbness down both my limbs. I am worried some sort of karma bus hit me.


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## BK23 (Apr 17, 2013)

bigtone128 said:


> So I was driving down the road last week and got rear-ended and broke the C-5 vertebrate in my neck....having numbness down both my limbs. I am worried some sort of karma bus hit me.


Sounds like the literal bus hit you. How are you holding up?


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## dymo (Jan 2, 2012)

Do you have health insurance? May be a good time to check out the new exchanges.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## happyman64 (Jan 12, 2012)

Wow BT. Get better. 

I know 10,000 US lawyers that would represent you in a heartbeat. 

Does your wife know you are in the hospital???
Your boys???
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## SadandAngry (Aug 24, 2012)

bigtone128 said:


> Well we live in different provinces (Canada) and in Canada they have this stupid rule you have to wait 1 year before filing for divorce. And then the other party has to agree or it gets costly....frankly don't have the money to contest her all the way.


Which provinces? In Alberta, the BS can file immediately, no waiting. You can fill out the forms yourself and get it done for a couple hundred bucks.


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

happyman64 said:


> Wow BT. Get better.
> 
> I know 10,000 US lawyers that would represent you in a heartbeat.
> 
> ...


I don't know if my ex knows - we haven't spoken. 
My boys know.

The thing about karma - is when we are bottled up with negative emotions - sometimes the karma bus hits us.

I am disappointed in myself. 

I have a cracked c5 and as worried my retina was going to detach but it is holding up okay for now. 

I hate this crap....I was lonely last weekend - Canada thanksgiving, hurt and no one around.


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

SadandAngry said:


> Which provinces? In Alberta, the BS can file immediately, no waiting. You can fill out the forms yourself and get it done for a couple hundred bucks.


Were married in the east coast but live in Ontario now. Both stipulate a year.


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## happyman64 (Jan 12, 2012)

I understand the loneliness.

Hopefully that will change for you when you can officially file for divorce.

Then your life can resume, without drama and a much better woman in your life.

Get well. Get healthy.

Good things are in your future.

They have to be after that accident.

HM


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

Thanks Happy. The numbness is not too bad today. I am down today because yesterday was Canada's Thanksgiving and it is a time for family get togethers and yet my family didn't for obvious reasons. It is times like that that really hit that we do not have a family anymore and what we really lost due to her affair. From what I know she is off playing Mommy with AP's family (which I really do not care about) BUT times like these really show what was lost. Then not to even receive a "hope you are okay" after the accident. Just cold cold cold. My friend keeps telling me "she is a master manipulator" - I am starting to believe him. I was driving down the road and saw one of her close confidantes (someone who supported her in the affair - when she saw me gave me a disgusted look and walked away from my vehicle. The thought occurred to me "What did I do that was wrong? "How am I the bad guy?" then I realized it was probably the venom from my ex's mouth that turned this woman against me.....


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## happyman64 (Jan 12, 2012)

bigtone128 said:


> Thanks Happy. The numbness is not too bad today. I am down today because yesterday was Canada's Thanksgiving and it is a time for family get togethers and yet my family didn't for obvious reasons. It is times like that that really hit that we do not have a family anymore and what we really lost due to her affair. From what I know she is off playing Mommy with AP's family (which I really do not care about) BUT times like these really show what was lost. Then not to even receive a "hope you are okay" after the accident. Just cold cold cold. My friend keeps telling me "she is a master manipulator" - I am starting to believe him. I was driving down the road and saw one of her close confidantes (someone who supported her in the affair - when she saw me gave me a disgusted look and walked away from my vehicle. The thought occurred to me "What did I do that was wrong? "How am I the bad guy?" then I realized it was probably the venom from my ex's mouth that turned this woman against me.....


That is why God gave us middle fingers BT. It is to be used to ward off evil, homewrecking friends.

I suggest you use yours.

And aside from your hurts. I am sure your sons knew where their mother was as well.

Get better. Get divorced. And find a good woman that loves you and your boys.

Then enjoy that 1st Thanksgiving as a new family.

Take a picture and send it to your Ex with the following message inside.




That is right, There is nothing but a blank inside.

I am sure she will get it.

Peace.

HM


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## SadandAngry (Aug 24, 2012)

ontario divorce application - Google Search


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

Well guess who picked up the divorce papers today - I found out it will not be that expensive. $167 to file and abut $500 all total. The precipitous of this was Canada Thanksgiving and she got our oldest son to be deceptive about where he was going and the secretiveness of her behaviour. I finally snapped and realized that her behaviour is not going to stop - she's like a naughty school girl who will not stop until she's disciplined. If there are no consequences for her behaviour - then she'll continue to disrespect me.... no sir...no matter what the cost of the divorce I'll pay! Thanks for the encouragement.


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

Bigtone, this is for you


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## bigtone128 (May 1, 2012)

Thanks Matt Matt


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