# Does this Make Me Crazy and Cheating Dating to Years Ago



## shygirlpinkie (Aug 29, 2016)

During my most recent relationship that ended this past May and lasted 1 year. That guy I was with put me through a lot. He was abused in his previous relationship, dating a narcissist, getting abused physically, verbally, and was cheated on and yet he put up with her for 6 long years, then finally cut ties and moved on. He then met me through a dating site and things with us went well until later on. When he didn't trust me, and kept accusing me of cheating, when I never did cheat at all during our time together. *Anyway things kept getting worse and him and I would fight all the time, as it turns out he suffered from mental illness, anxiety, social anxiety, depression, and also ADD/ADHD, so his mind wasn't in the right sense when him and I dated and he would always look back to his previous relationship and kept thinking I was doing what his ex-Girlfriend had done to him, when all along I never did anything.

During our time together thought, I would go and record our phone calls, and video chats, because there would be times where he would come out and accuse me right there on the spot "I hear those voices in the background" or say "I know there is someone there in the room, talking about me, I can hear them". When in reality there was never anyone in my room at all. I was always alone in my room, and it was night time so a lot of the neighbors in the houses near us would be asleep including my parents asleep in their own bedroom. And yet he would always tell me this and this would hurt me, because I knew I wasn't cheating or doing anything wrong at all. But yet he kept going on and on about it.

So does me recording him on the phone and in those video calls make me crazy? What he was doing hearing these voices scared me and worried me, I had to show my family and close friends what I was dealing with and I showed them and even they knew something was up and it was him, and his mind thinking process and ways, thinking I would be like his ex-Girlfriend when I was never like her at all.

I know I never cheated during our time together. But in all honesty I have done some cheating years back. Back in high school, I would juggle 2-3 Boyfriend's at a time, neither one ever knowing either. After high school. I would be in relationships and would cheat there as well, maybe dating 1 guy on the side going on 1 date or so, even having little crushes on other guys while in those relationships. But I only did the cheating I did because the guys I was in the relationship with, wouldn't want to hang out with me, wouldn't pay attention to me, or be there for me, or talk to me, so of course I wanted to find a guy that would be there for me, and I did with those few dates I went out on.

But after I met the guy I was with the longest out of all of the relationships ever in my lifetime, I was with this guy for 3 years, and I purposed to him and we were engaged for the 3 years we were together, but even during this time, I did have some crushes and did go on 1 or 2 dates, but I did finally stop my cheating once and for all, during that 3 year relationship, and after him and I broke up in 2011 and I was single up until January 2015, and got with my recent relationship the guy I broke up with in may 2016, I never cheated on this last guy I was with, not at all. And to this day and time, seeing this new guy, I have been seeing and dating for 1 month, I am not going to cheat on him. Besides that him and I are not even officially Boyfriend and Girlfriend. We are both still single and on dating websites, so we can date and chat to whoever we want too.*

Until we become official and do become a Boyfriend/Girlfriend couple, only then will I not cheat on him, since I am single I am free to do whatever I want. But my point is should I go and tell this new guy or future guys I do date or get into a relationship with, my past history, of me cheating even though it was years back, and I will never do it ever again. Or should I just keep it to myself and never bring it up? Should I mention to these new guys that I have recorded phone calls and video chats of previous guys, and gone on forums and message boards, posting about our issues and problems to the public, and letting them know, I will likely post about our issues and problems too? Or should I keep it to myself?

What do you think of all of this, does this make me crazy? Should I tell the guys I date in the future all of this or what?


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## LosingHim (Oct 20, 2015)

How old are you?


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## shygirlpinkie (Aug 29, 2016)

LosingHim said:


> How old are you?


I am 29.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

You do not need to tell this guy that you are recorded phone calls and video chats. Your last boyfriend sounds like he has some issue like schitzophrenia or some kind of phsycosis where he hears things that are not there. It makes sense that you recorded them so you could figure out what was going on. That's self protection. No need to share that with anyone.

Your 'cheating' sounds like it was mostly in high school. Just let it go. That's way too long ago. And I believe there was no sex involved. so let it go.


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## TaDor (Dec 20, 2015)

1 - Highschool doesn't really count much - relationships are not deep, they tend to last weeks or a few months.
2 - Doesn't seem you were in any REAL relationships in your early years. Light-dating, *IS* not having expectations of an exclusive relationship.
3 - You seem to mature in your 3yr relationship.
4 - 1-year guy has mental issues.

I think most people in their late 20s+ are not going to care - at least shouldn't. Talk about the last 2... but the important thing, if YOU end up being serious with this guy, tell him you are looking at honest committed relationship.


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