# My crazy mom and not sure what to do anymore



## Cherry (Sep 23, 2009)

I will try to explain this the best I can and the shortest I can. My 17 year old child lives with my mother, who is single, and has since she was 12 (at first it was because of a job relocation for me and then it turned into “she likes her school and friends now and she has her horses, blah blah) and that alone has been a source of contention, but I’ve been trying to deal with it. And at this point it doesn’t matter because my 17 year old will be off to college in a year. However, my H and I have 3 year old twins and my 17 year old comes over just about every weekend to spend time with them, and she brings her boyfriend with her (they’ve been together for just over two years). 

What’s prompted this post is because this past weekend they came over and we had a great weekend, but sporadically through the weekend my mother was acting like she needed my 17 year old to come back out there to help (with what, she wouldn’t say and I asked my daughter if she was suppose to do something out there and she said “no”) and when I stood up to my mom on Sunday and told her that we were in the middle of something at that moment and that when we were done she’d head that way she literally flipped her freaking lid and went running over to my daughters boyfriends’ house and told his mom that we were all sitting around getting drunk (all of us, my H, me and my 17 year old and her boyfriend). And while this is one incident that can be forgotten I’m sure, it’s an ongoing thing and we just got the point where my daughter’s boyfriend can freely come stay with her on the weekends when she comes over. 

Little things like this has been happening all my life. I know that my mom does not like my H and that plays a big part, but when my daughter comes over we have a great time together and it’s calm and peaceful until my mom starts blowing up my daughter’s phone or mine. It’s crazy and I don’t know whether to write my mom off completely and ignore her and run the risk of not being able to see my 17 year old this year again (my mom will forbid her from driving her truck over to my place and she’s a good hour away). 

Does anyone have ANY advice? I’m open to trying anything at this point! Thanks for reading.


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## NewlyWedMomy (Sep 10, 2011)

I can't imagine going through this... My thoughts are this..

I would tell your daughter to just move in with you until she leaves for college! I mean really... it's not gonna be that far away from her time to leave anyways. I would cut my Mom off. I'm sure your Mom feels like since she's had her these past years that she is now "MOM" and in reality, no, she's not! She's over stepping her boundaries and needs to control herself! Also, you got to think of the hard it's having on your daughter... yeah she's 17 and is wiser about this whole thing, but imagine the stress when she does come home to her grandma and things she has to hear and deal with! It's not a good sitation and I hope you figure something out that works for you all! ::HUGS::


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## Cherry (Sep 23, 2009)

Thank you for your response. My daughter did move in with us for the summer, and she was going to continue making the 2 hour roundtrip drive to school every day when it started this fall semester. However, our third vehicle blew up on us a few weeks before school was to start and we just do not have the money to replace it right now (we had just spent $3K on it when she moved in). She would have to go to a local school and take the bus until we can figure something out and she doesn't want to do that for her senior year, she wants to be around her friends that she's known since she was 12. I so want to get her to move in with us, it's heartbreaking to know that she does have to go back to that. I can hang up on my mom. Cutting her off completely is what my plan is when my daughter goes off to college though. I just can't put up with her BS anymore.  Thank you again!


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