# Has any WS ever called their spouse while with their AP?



## SoulStorm (Jul 17, 2012)

I'm Just curious to know because it happened to me. The way she was sounding alluded to him giving her oral while on the phone with me. she denied it of course. I could never "prove" it but I'm not a total idiot. She was breathy and couldn't concentrate, kept saying "what?"
I'm no longer with her, thank God, but what a twisted thing to do. Anyone else?


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## Chris989 (Jul 3, 2012)

Mine rang from his place a few times; I remember once was with a daft question about how many glasses of wine she could drink before driving home.

I didn't at any time get the impression that they "got off" on anything like that but the fact that I have no idea if that is true underlines how much of a different person they become (reveal?) when cheating.

edit/ I should clarify I figured this out afterwards when trawling through my memories and the phone records...


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## brokeneric (Jan 27, 2014)

Mine answered my call, said she was exercising so she was breathing hard.


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## LongWalk (Apr 4, 2013)

Eric, was that how you uncovered the affair?


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## brokeneric (Jan 27, 2014)

No.


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## russell28 (Apr 17, 2013)

Was your kids finding her and almost killing her OM how you found out? Take care of yourself. Your situation sounds tough, but it sounds like you're doing the right things.


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## brokeneric (Jan 27, 2014)

russell, thanks. I'll post everything when I can.


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## Thorburn (Nov 23, 2011)

Found out my wife was laying naked in a hotel room and talked to me and our sons. It was all part of her cover. She would always answer her phone. Then she started to turn off her phone. My boys (both are grown) knew she was up to no good and it took me a while.


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## SoulStorm (Jul 17, 2012)

Thanks for the responses. I kept asking was she with someone (like she was going to tell me the truth) I kept trying to hang up and she kept asking why. She kept me on the phone until she started talking normal again.

What a fool I was.


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## Chris989 (Jul 3, 2012)

SoulStorm said:


> Thanks for the responses. I kept asking was she with someone (like she was going to tell me the truth) I kept trying to hang up and she kept asking why. She kept me on the phone until she started talking normal again.
> 
> What a fool I was.


You weren't a fool, your wife was a bad person at that point.

We can never really defend ourselves against liars. Basic human interaction has to be founded on the assumption and trust that the other party is telling the truth. 

Without that, we have nothing and to trust your wife is not foolish at all.


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## SoulStorm (Jul 17, 2012)

Chris989 said:


> You weren't a fool, your wife was a bad person at that point.
> 
> We can never really defend ourselves against liars. Basic human interaction has to be founded on the assumption and trust that the other party is telling the truth.
> 
> Without that, we have nothing and to trust your wife is not foolish at all.


Thanks Chris,

Just to clarify,she was my girlfriend.....I didn't marry her. That phone call was the beginning of the end. My spidey senses was going off big time and I couldn't trust her after that


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## Chris989 (Jul 3, 2012)

SoulStorm said:


> Thanks Chris,
> 
> Just to clarify,she was my girlfriend.....I didn't marry her. That phone call was the beginning of the end. My spidey senses was going off big time and I couldn't trust her after that


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## damagedgoods1 (Nov 8, 2013)

Not the same thing, but my MIL is currently dating 2 men at the same time and has been for over a year now. When I see her, she is usually with one of her 2 boyfriends and she never answers her cell phone. She'll just let it go to voicemail.


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## Racer (Sep 24, 2009)

Yep.. Not during the act, but while over there. She eventually got “smarter” because I’d mention the background sounds weren’t right for where ever she claimed to be. So she learned to text instead. 

She has since admitted that often she was in his bathroom calling me and lying about it all. She was sometimes in his bed when texting...


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## ReformedHubby (Jan 9, 2013)

I met a man in a bar once (yeah I know I should stay out of bars) that told me what his old lady did to him. Apparently she took the baby monitor (the listening part) over to the neighbors house. He awoke to the sounds of his wife having sex with his neighbor. He basically said that she was crazy and he was glad to be rid of her. He has custody of the kid now. That took some balls. I can't believe anyone could be that cold.


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## SoulStorm (Jul 17, 2012)

Racer said:


> Yep.. Not during the act, but while over there. She eventually got “smarter” because I’d mention the background sounds weren’t right for where ever she claimed to be. So she learned to text instead.
> 
> She has since admitted that often she was in his bathroom calling me and lying about it all. She was sometimes in his bed when texting...


WOW.....Amazing how callous and cold they can become


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## Squeakr (May 1, 2013)

SoulStorm said:


> WOW.....Amazing how callous and cold they can become


Yes, but not so in their mind. To the WS, they were just checking in with you and trying to show you that they were thinking of you, the family, and missing it all while doing nothing wrong!! <cough, cough, puke!> But so goes the mind of the WS in their A!


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## BetrayedDad (Aug 8, 2013)

Squeakr said:


> Yes, but not so in their mind. To the WS, they were just checking in with you and trying to show you that they were thinking of you, the family, and missing it all while doing nothing wrong!! <cough, cough, puke!> But so goes the mind of the WS in their A!


Pretty much nailed it.... Cheaters are messed up people. 

My ex never called me and most of the time she let it go to voicemail. However, she did answer a few times with him there.


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## Horizon (Apr 4, 2013)

There were some times when she sounded breathy/pumped (for want of a better term) when she answered the phone. The truth is I just don't know. I think I asked her about this once or twice - her answers? I think she may have once said she just used the office stairs and another time said "No, nothing, just here" (at her desk). She was a heavy smoker but the fact is I have not noticed her in this state in recent times and we talk every day. I do wonder. Yet more post DDay sh!t to consider. And of course it would all be denied like everything else if i put her under scrutiny.


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## Squeakr (May 1, 2013)

Horizon said:


> There were some times when she sounded breathy/*pumped (for want of a better term) *when she answered the phone. The truth is I just don't know. I think I asked her about this once or twice - her answers? I think she may have once said she just used the office stairs and another time said "No, nothing, just here" (at her desk). She was a heavy smoker but the fact is I have not noticed her in this state in recent times and we talk every day. I do wonder. Yet more post DDay sh!t to consider. And of course it would all be denied like everything else if i put her under scrutiny.



Phrasing made me smile. :rofl::rofl::rofl::smthumbup:


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## RNS (Apr 6, 2013)

It probably happened often. I was just too stupid to know. She was/is a VERY good lair. Looking back at things, I think she the times she was worst (meanest) to me on the phone was when she was with him. 

When I was parked outside of the OM apartment building and I walked up to her car and called her. She did not answer at first but called me back...after I called back a second time. She acted all upset, telling be she was at the pharmacist picking up something for me  I told her I was down next to her car. God lover her  I am finally free now.


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## Racer (Sep 24, 2009)

Squeakr said:


> Yes, but not so in their mind. To the WS, they were just checking in with you and trying to show you that they were thinking of you, the family, and missing it all while doing nothing wrong!! <cough, cough, puke!> But so goes the mind of the WS in their A!


Yep, in my WW's mind it was just part of the coverup. I always initiated the contact with something like "I thought you were going to be home by eight?" So, she'd text a reason for the delay or the excuse. Usually something like "I'm just finishing up... be home soon." (what she just finished I now know).


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## SoulStorm (Jul 17, 2012)

ReformedHubby said:


> I met a man in a bar once (yeah I know I should stay out of bars) that told me what his old lady did to him. Apparently she took the baby monitor (the listening part) over to the neighbors house. He awoke to the sounds of his wife having sex with his neighbor. He basically said that she was crazy and he was glad to be rid of her. He has custody of the kid now. That took some balls. I can't believe anyone could be that cold.


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## Thundarr (Jul 4, 2012)

Waywards are justification experts and they often feel emotionally powerful (untouchable) because they're being chased.

It makes sense that a lot of waywards would do this. Probably more than we assume.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

Why in the hell would my old lady even want to call me much less pick up my call, hell the last thing she wanted was to deal with reality.
Why ruin a good time by dealing with her husband.

I do recall the first OM and when we talked on the phone while she was at his house they broke up that day. I figure since then she learned never to communicate with me while with her OMs...
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## poida (Jan 17, 2014)

Yeah, she picked up lied about where she was. I didn't need to quiz her - I knew. The only way people can do this if you are history to them and not important. I had to accept that and it was hard.


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