# Update: 22 Yr One Side Love Affair



## Lasr60637 (Nov 14, 2008)

Here's an update on what's been happening with me:

I've had such an attitude with him last few days and he has noticed but hasnt said anything. The ride to work this morning was extremely slow because we are in the middle of some nasty weather today so I knew I had him as a captured audience and it was time to talk.

He asked what was wrong and this was my reply:

You have been talking to OW for the past 6 months after I told you that if you want to stay married to me, the two of you can talk no longer forever! You said its nothing and you wouldnt talk to her anymore, then you went and got a prepaid cell phone and you've been calling her ever since. I didnt know the letters S-T-U-P-I-D was sitting across my forehead. Who the hell do you think you are! I told you and her, yeah I confronted her in the parking gararge - but you know that because while I was cussing her out, she was dialing a number on a cellphone and holding the phone so someone on the other line could hear me - I know it was you because I saw your secret phone and a call came in at exactly the time of our confrontation. She knows how I feel, you know how I feel but the two of you kept it going like I'm not ****. If you want to be with the *****, quit wasting my time, go home, pack your ****, and STEP! Let her ass take care of you.

He tried to say he only called a couple of times to wish her a happy holiday and to see how her holiday went.

I said, why? What the **** does it matter how her holiday went.

Then he said he called twice and she didnt answer nor returned his calls.

I said, well good for her. She listened to me. You didnt. After the 1st call, why didnt you just leave her alone? She has caller id, she knows its you. She probably was looking at the phone when you called and deliberately let it go to voicemail. You called some more because you really want to talk to her. Well, **** you. I told you I don't share men and especially not with someone I know. You have disrespected me at my job by having a relationship with someone I see and speak to. You aint ****.

Then I said, I dont need this. I dont need you. I can do bad by myself. If you dont want to act like a married man and be only with me, then this marriage is over and I want a divorce. For 22 years there has been a lot of things about you that have bothered me or made me uphappy or stuff that I had to just "live with" because you are my husband. Not one time did I feel it necessary to get in a relationship with another man because I wasnt happy in my marriage. I just dealt with it. So **** you.

Lot more talk ensued, then we finally made it to work, he pulled in front of my office building and I was still talking ****, then he got really mad and said for me to do what I have to do and I said I plan to. Then he pissed me off when he said, "Don't say another word to me", I went off more and cuss him out more as I was getting out of the car.

Then he erupted and got out of his seatbelt, threw the car door open and charged me as I was walking across the street to my building. I looked at him and said, "What the hell you think you going to do? Don't be stupid and go to jail today because if you hit me, you are going to jail and you will lose your job *******". He grabbed my coat and was saying something but I wasnt listening, I just snatched away from him and went into the building.

The ride home will be interesting. Once he cools off and realizes that I mean what I say and when he mentally tries to make plans about leaving and realize he has no where to go - well, we'll see.

I also reminded him that if he leaves, he will never in life be with someone who cares more about him and well being than me. I said, "No one will ever have your ****ing back like me".

That is all.


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## sunflower (Dec 15, 2008)

[QUOTE

I also reminded him that if he leaves, he will never in life be with someone who cares more about him and well being than me. I said, "No one will ever have your ****ing back like me".

That is all.[/QUOTE]

Why are you reminding him if HE LEAVES? you need to remind him when you leave. And make sure he knows that the grass isnt greener it will be a differant women with differant problems. And when he is with her he will be insecure with her cause if she will break up your marriage that says alot about a person and it will just happen in there relationship.


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## MarkTwain (Aug 1, 2008)

Lasr60637-

It seems like you are trying to crack open his shell with your anger. You have never really understood each other, and now you are trying anger, but you don't want to actually push him away, you actually want him to break down, say sorry and beg for your forgiveness.

It might be better to work on yourself, learn to be firm about what you want and who you are. You can't bludgeon someone into loving you.


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## Lasr60637 (Nov 14, 2008)

MarkTwain said:


> You can't bludgeon someone into loving you.


Being consistently passive doesnt help either.


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## sunflower (Dec 15, 2008)

I dont think that you should be passive stand your ground for sure bont dont come off needy!


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