# ****ed up



## amanda1959 (Mar 29, 2010)

you really ****ed me up for life gary


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## amanda1959 (Mar 29, 2010)

**** you


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## amanda1959 (Mar 29, 2010)

just die


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## chuckles (May 2, 2010)

anger issues?


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## Blonddeee (Dec 17, 2008)

I'm going to guess her soon to be ex husband got ahold of her account...


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## cody5 (Sep 2, 2009)

You OK Amanda?


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## amanda1959 (Mar 29, 2010)

no i am ****ed up, how could a amn do this to a woman he has know for 30 years?


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## WantsHappiness (Jun 17, 2009)

Amanda, I’m sorry you’re going through this. I’ve followed your story and I imagine I’d be feeling pretty ****ed up right now too if I were you. You have every right to be angry! 

A man could do this to a woman because it was never about the woman in the first place. This is about him. Not you. This is no reflection on you or who you are or who you’ve been. You have been a loving and supportive wife. You are a strong woman who will get through this and will come out stronger on the other side. You didn’t do anything wrong. I will say it again, this is about him not you. He chose to deceive, he chose to cheat, he chose to live a lie. 

Have you started any type of counseling to help you get through this?


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## amanda1959 (Mar 29, 2010)

yes I went to the doctor about this for the first time this morning and had a break down in her office....I think I waited to long to go. anyway I have spent so much on counselling at $160/hr I went in and begged her for help and she is offering me a social worker that works in the office. Amazing what happens when you just ask for help....I know you are right it is about him and I get that it is just hard to understand when a man says to his wife "you were not part of the equation at the time" this just indicates there was no conscious thoughts of him being married and how it would effect his wife if she knew what he was doing...he did make his choices but it is so painful that I wasn't part of the thought process....
I will go and talk this out...it may take awhile....when I titles this new thread it was after I had some wine late on a Saturday night. I get really angry sometimes and then I get really sad....


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## WantsHappiness (Jun 17, 2009)

It’s a good thing that you had a breakdown! You’re letting it out and not letting these feelings fester inside of you. All that matters is that you’re getting the counseling now and you can start to work through everything. Even better that they have a social worker who can work with you :smthumbup:

It’s pretty selfish, I think, to be able to say that you as his wife were not a part of the equation when he was doing these things. The only thing I can think is that he had so much inner turmoil over it he just couldn’t see past it to you. Or he blocked you out so he could do what he was doing. No way that excuses what he’s done and who knows what his real reasons are. I hope that someday he can look back and see the devastation he has caused and make amends for that. 

Getting angry and sad is normal and part of the process. Not that it makes it any easier! Vent as often as you need too!


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