# Need an answer from a woman please



## DHB (Nov 6, 2014)

I've been with my wife for 24 years, we don't have any issues (i.e. infidelity, financial, etc). We have a very common, everyday marriage and are quite happy together. We are very intimate, we embrace several times a day and always tell each other how much we still love and value each other. We have no children, by choice.

My wife suffered a minor injury a few weeks back, and we haven't been intimate in that time, understandably, intimate meaning sexual. She is almost fully recovered, and is missing having sex (as am I), and we were talking about it this morning. She told me though, that she only wanted to please me, she has a desire to only please me, and not her. She wants to have oral sex (me receiving) and she says that gives her more pleasure than straight on sex because it pleases me so much. She still wants to have regular sex, but wants to give me oral more.

I immediately thought that she didn't like to have sex with me anymore, and she stressed that wasn't the case, she loves to have sex with me, she just wants to please me and that's it, she said she gets more pleasure out of that than almost anything.

I know sex is more emotional for a woman than a man, but I don't want to "deny" her anything. I'm wondering, should I just let this go for a while, and let her "please" me (like I'm complaining... ). 

I'm just worried about this being a one way street.


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## karole (Jun 30, 2010)

I am a woman and I think you should let your wife please you as she wants. You two seem very open about your sex life, so if she didn't want to do this for you, I'm sure she wouldn't offer. Just enjoy it. You can always repay the favor.


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## DoF (Mar 27, 2014)

What the hell are you complaining about man?



She just told you that she enjoys BJ more and pleasing you.

All of this should be a validation of her love for you. Not the other way around.

Since you are probably overwhelmed by all the attention/action you are getting....it would be nice of you to ask her what she would desire from her end as you like to give as much as she does etc.


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## Anon Pink (Jan 17, 2013)

After you check your credit card statement ....  stop worrying that she is not enjoying sex. Perhaps she is feeling so loved by your care and concern during her recovery she wants to show you just how loved you made her feel by focusing only on loving you.

That's so sweet!


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## SurpriseMyself (Nov 14, 2009)

I think you are letting your thoughts run wild on this. Let it be what it is. If she does what she says she's going to, then I think you need to let this one go.


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## yeah_right (Oct 23, 2013)

Giving BJ's without reciprocal service is an incredible turn on for many women. It's a very cool feeling, a mix of love, power and little bit of danger. Totally possible that she means it as long as she no longer wants anything else.

I'm guessing she's in my age range. I do know that I had some female issues that impacted my drive and caused some pain for a while, that eventually required medical interaction. Keep an eye on her during her PMS and period days (without asking if she's on the rag!!!!). If she seems to be weaker, or complaining of cramps, a heavy feeling or that she's losing buckets of blood, suggest a trip the the gyn. Beyond that, have fun!


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## Happilymarried25 (Mar 19, 2014)

Every man would love to be in your position.


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## allwillbewell (Dec 13, 2012)

Are you saying that she admitted that she has always had sex only to please you..never got any pleasure from it for herself? Is she able to orgasm? If that is the case, perhaps she is being honest with the level of her own enjoyment but reassures you that the pleasure you recieve is enough for her. 

I think I understand how you would be concerned that you may not be pleasuring her sufficiently. If that is the case, you both need to have an in depth discussion about what both your sexual expectations are and how succesfully you both feel you are meeting the needs of the other. If you feel it is important TO YOU that you pleasure HER then express that.

If both of you are honest and it turns out she is happy with her level of pleasure than RELAX and enjoy each other. Remember it not quantity (how many bjs, orgasms, or times per week) that matters but the quality of the love expressed within the sexual experience that is most important.


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

I'm a dude, but I want to say this.YOU HAVE AN AWESOME WIFE!!! Do what ever it takes to make sure she knows you appreciate her.


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## DHB (Nov 6, 2014)

Thank you, everyone, for your responses, and compliments. 

@allwillbewell - No, she can orgasm (just ask my sore neck, ok, that might of been TMI, but we're all adults talking about sex here)

I thought about this all day at work, and you guys are right, just let it go. It's just hard for me to be on the recieving end, without giving, hard for me to wrap my head around that, because, I'm a giver, when I'm giving to her, and see that she is enjoying herself, it makes me happy. LOL, as I'm typing this I'm realizing that is exactly what is going on with her, I'd be perfectly happy giving to her and recieving nothing (for a while), why wouldn't she feel the same?

For now, it makes her happy just pleasing me, and with the way she wants to do it, well, I'm not going to stop her! I'm sure when she wants some, she'll have a way to tell me. And I'll be there.

Thank you again.


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## DHB (Nov 6, 2014)

yeah_right said:


> Giving BJ's without reciprocal service is an incredible turn on for many women. It's a very cool feeling, a mix of love, power and little bit of danger. Totally possible that she means it as long as she no longer wants anything else.


That, I never knew, very interesting. I don't know how old you are, but I am 43 and my wife is 40. We met in high school and have been attached ever since.


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## yeah_right (Oct 23, 2013)

I'm 46(ish) and married 20+ years. As far as the feeling as a woman, think of it this way. She has your most prized, sensitive, fragile body part between her teeth. She has the power with just her mouth to either bring you the ultimate pleasure...or bite it off.

All joking aside, still keep an eye on her for the next few years as far as female changes and make sure she gets her annual exams.


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## Hicks (Jan 14, 2011)

If you hit the lottery are you going to worry if the state has enough money in the budget to pay you?


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## richardsharpe (Jul 8, 2014)

Good afternoon all
Nothing wrong with a sexual gift, freely given.


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## WandaJ (Aug 5, 2014)

Any chance she is discovering her submissive side in sex?


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## allwillbewell (Dec 13, 2012)

Richardsharpe: Unless it is given to someone else's spouse! LOL


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## lifelesson01 (Nov 3, 2014)

I am a woman in my 40s and I feel the same way as your wife. Having sex is great, but giving a BJ is so much more powerful. I missed that more after my divorce than the actual sex. Actually if you read my previous posts, I am missing it now...LOL. 

Enjoy the time with your wife  she is


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## Justus3 (Oct 18, 2014)

lifelesson01 said:


> I am a woman in my 40s and I feel the same way as your wife. Having sex is great, but giving a BJ is so much more powerful.
> 
> Enjoy the time with your wife  she is


:iagree:


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## seattle_stranger (Nov 4, 2014)

WandaJ said:


> Any chance she is discovering her submissive side in sex?


DING DING DING!!!!!!!!!

Dominate her. Come home from work, walk in the door, and don't say anything to her. Stare her down as you walk aggressively straight at her, grab her by the hips, pull her into you, and ravage her right there in the kitchen. Be as sexually dominant as you can, get her from behind, maybe not even pull her clothes all the way off, like a male animal in the wild who smelled that scent of a nearby female in heat, and you just caught her. Now inseminate this gorgeous, helpless, submissive specimen just as she was hoping her big, bad, scary man would.


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## Holland (Aug 20, 2012)

DHB said:


> I've been with my wife for 24 years, we don't have any issues (i.e. infidelity, financial, etc). We have a very common, everyday marriage and are quite happy together. We are very intimate, we embrace several times a day and always tell each other how much we still love and value each other. We have no children, by choice.
> 
> My wife suffered a minor injury a few weeks back, and we haven't been intimate in that time, understandably, intimate meaning sexual. She is almost fully recovered, and is missing having sex (as am I), and we were talking about it this morning. She told me though, that she only wanted to please me, she has a desire to only please me, and not her. She wants to have oral sex (me receiving) and she says that gives her more pleasure than straight on sex because it pleases me so much. She still wants to have regular sex, but wants to give me oral more.
> 
> ...


Not in this house. And yes it is a major turn on for me to give NSA BJ's but not if it were all we ever did.


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## Thound (Jan 20, 2013)

Please have your wife call mine.


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## ToothFairy (May 19, 2013)

You mentioned a "sore neck" to bring your wife to orgasm. Any chance this takes too long for her as well and she just wants to bypass all of that? 

What kind of oral skills do you possess? It shouldn't take very long if you are very good.


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