# What should I say to her?



## WallaceBea (Apr 7, 2014)

I got word last night that a friend of mine's husband has recently left her. They have been married for one and a half years. After the wedding, he became very passionate about fitness, and while she is very active, she isn't as fit as him, and it is for this reason that he has decided he wants to divorce her. 

I've connected with her, and we are meeting up tomorrow to go for a walk and have a coffee. 

What should I say to her? What kinds of things are appropriate to say in this situation? Obviously saying canned things like "Everything happens for a reason" and "You're better off without him" are asinine and pointless. I know there isn't anything I can say to make her feel better, but what IS appropriate to say in this situation? 

Any advice would help.


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## happy2gether (Dec 6, 2015)

it is not so much what you say, as how well you listen.


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## Hope1964 (Sep 26, 2011)

Just agree with whatever she says about him.

He sounds like a real a$$ - leaving her because she isn't as 'fit' as he is?!?!? Wow.


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## kristin2349 (Sep 12, 2013)

I would avoid the usual canned responses and just ask her how she is doing and then listen to her. She doesn't need you to "fix" anything she just needs a friend. Sometimes just being there is all that is required.


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## WallaceBea (Apr 7, 2014)

I am a good listener. Listening, I can definitely do. 

I don't want this to be a trash talk session. I don't think that will be productive. As much as I think he is a total jerk for what he did, going on and on about how I feel about him, won't make her feel better.


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## lifeistooshort (Mar 17, 2013)

Ask her how she's doing and if she needs to vent let her vent. 

She can guide the conversation.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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