# Masturbating for your spouse



## Jax10

Okay. I am not sure if this has been covered quite this way, so if so my apologies.

However, I have a question. Probably for the women, but maybe for everyone.

Do you (would you) enjoy watching your spouse masturbate? The reason I ask is that I would like her to watch me. I don't know why, just that I would. I have it in my head that she could watch or join in if she wanted (join in being...whatever she wanted it to be).

But sometimes fantasy's are better off staying fantasy's... 

So, women, what would you do if your husband asked you to sit down and watch him? Would that be weird? A turn off? 

Thank you.


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## Holland

Major turn on for me as is mutual masturbation. I love to watch him.

Have said it before though Ladies, it is damn painful to get a shot in the eye so be warned.


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## livnlearn

I think you will be pleasantly surprised by the responses you are going to get.


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## waiwera

Yes I love to watch my man masturbate.... very sexy.


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## Jax10

But how do you start it? Would it be weird if I just invited her in to the bedroom and started some kissing and then jus went with it?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## dancinginthedark

I asked my husband for years and years to do this for me. He was shy and coy about it and felt strange doing it.
I know it is not everyones idea of a turn on, but I would be talking to her about it. Don't ust do it or push her. Open the idea up in the world of communication. Start by talking about your sew life, likes and desires and what you would like. It would only make you more open and comfortable.
There were things I wanted to try and my husband wanted to try that the other didn't. Some of them we did for the sae of each other but there were other things that we found we had in common and both wanted to try.
I think communication and talking about sex and fantasies is really good. 

PS. I am very turned on now that he can do that in front of me


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## IndyTMI

I did just a week ago for my wife...towards the end, she jumped in and assisted. It was one of my best orgasms I have ever had masturbating. It was awesome!


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## Holland

Jax10 said:


> But how do you start it? Would it be weird if I just invited her in to the bedroom and started some kissing and then jus went with it?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I agree with the others, communicate about it first. SO and I had already talked about masturbation and were very open with each other about our "habits". 
It is just a natural part of our sex lives.

I would have felt a bit odd if he invited me into the bedroom to watch. We do shower together and that is a good place to do it.


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## StargateFan

Just make sure you have good communication going. She may or may not like it if you plan on popping in your copy of Barely Legal 121 in the DVD player.


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## ladybird

I would watch.. Join whatever.


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## Hailey2009

So I'm suddenly feeling all alone here in the corner, but that is not something I would ever have asked to see him do. I guess I wouldn't be surprised if he wanted to watch me, but the reverse just never crossed my mind.

Maybe I'll find myself reconsidering someday? The above posts sound convincing despite my doubts.


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## jaharthur

Hailey2009 said:


> So I'm suddenly feeling all alone here in the corner, but that is not something I would ever have asked to see him do. I guess I wouldn't be surprised if he wanted to watch me, but the reverse just never crossed my mind.
> 
> Maybe I'll find myself reconsidering someday? The above posts sound convincing despite my doubts.


While he's watching you, you watch him.


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## dubbizle

When you are both in the bed nude,just lay down next to her kissing her telling her how hot she is making you and start getting yourself off,tell her you would just like to look at how beatiful she is.


A great number of women are very curious about the male body and how things work.


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## Ano

I LOOVEEE watching him!!!


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## Lordhavok

See if she's into it first, some women like it, others dont. If she's one that dont, you dont want the embarrassment of that hanging around.


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## williamjones

my wife does NOT want to see me masturbate.

I would like to see her do it, but she would feel uncomfortable.

Come to think of it, I would feel funny doing it front of her. It would be easy to masturbate in front of a stranger than my wife


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## WorkingOnMe

Hailey2009 said:


> So I'm suddenly feeling all alone here in the corner, but that is not something I would ever have asked to see him do. I guess I wouldn't be surprised if he wanted to watch me, but the reverse just never crossed my mind.
> 
> Maybe I'll find myself reconsidering someday? The above posts sound convincing despite my doubts.


You're not alone. I've mentioned it to my wife several times after seeing threads like this. No interest. In fact, very much against it. That is, she is against it. Not me.


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## TCSRedhead

I love to watch him - but I will admit it's hard to JUST watch and not jump in and participate so it often ends that way!


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## Chris Taylor

My wife and I were fooling around and after she had been performing oral on my I started stroking myself. She saw it and thought it was hot. She asked my to do it more, but I felt that if I'm having sex infrequently, it's going to be PIV or PIA. Masturbation is a fall-back position.


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## Randy52

Wife and I both masturbate in front of each other.... sometimes to "cumpletion" and other times as foreplay. Very arousing.


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## Zatol Ugot?

You said that you want your wife to watch you. But do you want to watch your wife? Have you ever asked her about it? That might be a really good way to start the conversation. Ask her if she would be willing to do it for you. If she says yes, then watch her and then ask her if she would like for you to reciprocate. If she says no, tell her you would be willing to go first to get things rolling.
My wife and I do this for each other on occasion. Probably once out of every 10 times we have sex we will masturbate ourselves to orgasm in front of each other. VERY HOT! But if I had to be honest, now that we have done it quite a few times, it doesn't seem to be as important or as much of a thrill as it used to be.


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## marriedguy

my wife doesnt care for it..I did it one time, she was mostly just concerned that I didnt get the sheets wet...
she wouldnt ever touch herself...Ive suggested it many times, but she is disgusted by the thought of it.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## 40isthenew20

My wife says that she gets nothing out of watching me masturbate. She will help me finish off that way a lot but it doesn't lead to sex - at least the majority of the time. 

She claims that she doesn't at all and won't for me, either. But I'm working on that. She did once years ago so I know she has it in her.


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## oldgeezer

I have not done it for my wife, who would be rather disturbed if I did, I think. 

And she seems to not want to talk about or even let on about her masturbating, but I do think she does at least once in a blue moon. 

It's my plan to very gently coax her into the idea of doing some stimulation in my presence, while we're engaged in some intimacy of some kind. Have to break down the barrier she's erected where she says "I feel strange trying to do that". 

The idea is to get her to stop resisting making herself feel good. It's a barrier she's built mentally and I'd prefer to take it down. I know they can be taken down, because she's broken down many of them over the years. 

I'd prefer she were comfortable enough with sexuality that I could walk into the bedroom, find her using a vibrator and it not cause her embarassment.


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## marriedguy

I did however masturbate the other day for a bit just after doing it doggy style..most of it ended up around her booty but some shot up to her shoulder..she was freaked out by it and ran off to the bathroom..


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## WorkingOnMe

marriedguy said:


> I did however masturbate the other day for a bit just after doing it doggy style..most of it ended up around her booty but some shot up to her shoulder..she was freaked out by it and ran off to the bathroom..


lol. Keeps her on her toes.


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## TrustInUs

I like watching my husband though I normally get too worked up to let him finish. I do it for him as well, but took some getting used to. We both enjoy it occasionally.


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## Holland

I find it sad that some women think it is disgusting. For me it is not just about watching him do the actual deed but how turned on I get from him being turned on.
The look on his face, the sounds he makes and the complete release he gets from it, he is happy which makes me happy. I think it is one of the most intimate parts of our sex life.


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## Hailey2009

Holland -- what is your husband using for his arousal? If you, what do you do for him while he does that?


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## firedog1

My wife and I have done that for years. She watches me but, she will never do herself. Unless it is during intercourse. Hailey2009. You don't know what you are missing.


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## Holland

Hailey2009 said:


> Holland -- what is your husband using for his arousal? If you, what do you do for him while he does that?


Hailey luckily we are both HD, just having a shower together is enough for him. He is very easily aroused just by the thought that we are going to have sex or even if I just say "let's go".
He is aroused by the fact that I am there with him, lying next to him naked, watching him.

Mutual masturbation or just watching each other is something that just seems to happen when we are in bed, it is usually as part of a session or maybe an hour or so after we have had sex.


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## Michael A. Brown

It depends. I haven't tried it on my wife.


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## I Notice The Details

Holland said:


> Hailey luckily we are both HD, just having a shower together is enough for him. He is very easily aroused just by the thought that we are going to have sex or even if I just say "let's go".
> He is aroused by the fact that I am there with him, lying next to him naked, watching him.
> 
> Mutual masturbation or just watching each other is something that just seems to happen when we are in bed, it is usually as part of a session or maybe an hour or so after we have had sex.


I agree with Holland. My wife loves to watch....sometimes up close in the shower or bedroom, or sometimes thru a slightly open door. There are times that she will initiate this activity by leaving her panties on my pillow, along with some erotic photos of her that we have taken in the past. She will leave a sticky note on the photos to leave the door open just a crack so she can watch. This happens on a night where I really want to have sex but she is not up for it. She understands my high sex drive, and this is one way we compromise. It is all good!


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## ScarletBegonias

Jax10 said:


> Okay. I am not sure if this has been covered quite this way, so if so my apologies.
> 
> However, I have a question. Probably for the women, but maybe for everyone.
> 
> Do you (would you) enjoy watching your spouse masturbate? The reason I ask is that I would like her to watch me. I don't know why, just that I would. I have it in my head that she could watch or join in if she wanted (join in being...whatever she wanted it to be).
> 
> But sometimes fantasy's are better off staying fantasy's...
> 
> So, women, what would you do if your husband asked you to sit down and watch him? Would that be weird? A turn off?
> 
> Thank you.


It's sexy.I can't explain why.It was a highlight when I got to see my normally bashful exSO (when he was my SO of course LOL) wrapping his hand around it to stroke...OH MY!!


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## MaritimeGuy

TCSRedhead said:


> I love to watch him - but I will admit it's hard to JUST watch and not jump in and participate so it often ends that way!


Isn't that kind of the point. 

I love watching my partner masturbate. I like to see the way she touches herself to give me insight into how she likes to be touched.


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## jaquen

My wife gets visibly flustered and out of sorts when she sees me jack off. It's a huge turn on for her. I do it sometimes she to watch how discombobulated it gets her.


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## IndyTMI

She really got a kick out of last nights performance...
From our lack or having orgasms during morning sex, I had sent her a text while at work telling her how sore and built up I was. Told her I planned to take care of business when I got home so she could watch.
I ended up waiting until after dinner, which by then I was in plenty of pain. She eagerly watched me as I was going to town on myself.
As I reached climax, I fumbled around, trying to grab the towel to catch it, but I had already started to erupt. First shot was aimed right at my face...yup...actually caught part of it in my mouth , which I was not expecting at all. She busts out laughing as I wipe my face and have that "What the hell just happened" look 
She asked me how it tasted, it was just a tiny salty, but mostly neutral...much warmer than I had imagined. 
I told her next time, it was going all over her face!


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## jaquen

IndyTM said:


> She really got a kick out of last nights performance...
> From our lack or having orgasms during morning sex, I had sent her a text while at work telling her how sore and built up I was. Told her I planned to take care of business when I got home so she could watch.
> I ended up waiting until after dinner, which by then I was in plenty of pain. She eagerly watched me as I was going to town on myself.
> As I reached climax, I fumbled around, trying to grab the towel to catch it, but I had already started to erupt. First shot was aimed right at my face...yup...actually caught part of it in my mouth , which I was not expecting at all. She busts out laughing as I wipe my face and have that "What the hell just happened" look
> She asked me how it tasted, it was just a tiny salty, but mostly neutral...much warmer than I had imagined.
> I told her next time, it was going all over her face!


You really should rename yourself "*TMI*". Dude your posts on sexual matters tend to go way beyond the required info for the topic at hand.


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## IndyTMI

jaquen said:


> You really should rename yourself "*TMI*". Dude your posts on sexual matters tend to go way beyond the required info for the topic at hand.


 Sorry, I tend to get a bit excited...as I have only recently been able to express myself sexually to my wife.


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## ankh

How does your wife like the new expressive YOU?


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## ankh

I am betting the thread is a bit arousing and exciting to more than a few of us here!!


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## Lyris

I love watching my husband. Big turn on.


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## IndyTMI

ankh said:


> How does your wife like the new expressive YOU?


She actually seems to be very receptive and smiles.


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## waiwera

jaquen said:


> My wife gets visibly flustered and out of sorts when she sees me jack off. It's a huge turn on for her. I do it sometimes she to watch how discombobulated it gets her.


Discombobulated - where on earth do you find these words?
Websters Dictionary of Freaky Words?

It sounded so painful... I had to google it!


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## jaharthur

waiwera said:


> Discombobulated - where on earth do you find these words?
> Websters Dictionary of Freaky Words?
> 
> It sounded so painful... I had to google it!


I just hope she doesn't get so discombobulated that she defenestrates herself.


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## ankh

What's important is that we keep our spouse guessing and wondering and always wanting a little bit more excitement.


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## I Notice The Details

I just was getting ready for bed tonight and saw that my wife put her red panties on my pillow when I wasn't looking. She knew I was going to bed before her, and that I was very horny tonight. I saw a handwritten note on them, but haven't read it yet. I hope she wants to join me once I have gotten started with the Astroglide....I know she is on her period, so this is her way of recognizing my high drive and encouraging me to do something about it. I am signing off to go and polish the stallion....at her request.


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## ankh

How cool is that!! Enjoy the strokes!


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## Dulciean

I have enticed my hubby into doing this for me... Find it so hot and kind of kinky! Am hoping to one day shed my own inhibitions and put on my own show just for him :awink:


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## Holland

Dulciean said:


> I have enticed my hubby into doing this for me... Find it so hot and kind of kinky! Am hoping to one day shed my own inhibitions and put on my own show just for him :awink:


Dulciean if it helps I find it easier to use a vibe to give him a show, not sure why but I don't seem as reserved that way.


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## dubbizle

Dulciean-Seems kind of one sided[joke] so if you want the best of both worlds lay across from each other with the soles of you feet touching and you both have your legs spread open,then prop up your backs so you can both see what is happening and then go for it.You can also both sit in cahirs across from one another.

Your husband is probably going out of his mind waiting for you to join him,so hope in there.


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## Omgitsjoe

My wife doesnt do this for me often but sometimes when she's in a very naughty mood she would !! She often fantasizes that she's webcamming with " whomever " as i watch her masturbate and this would get her very turned on ........which i of course enjoy as well !!!


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## BeachGuy

marriedguy said:


> my wife doesnt care for it..I did it one time, she was mostly just concerned that I didnt get the sheets wet...
> she wouldnt ever touch herself...Ive suggested it many times, but she is disgusted by the thought of it.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


How sad is that? My stbx would also NEVER watch me and I'm fairly convinced she has never masturbated herself in her entire life.


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## ankh

Sad to read this, Beach. I bet she won't even allow the topic of masturbation when you talk.


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## jaquen

Omgitsjoe said:


> My wife doesnt do this for me often but sometimes when she's in a very naughty mood she would !! She often fantasizes that she's webcamming with " whomever " as i watch her masturbate and this would get her very turned on ........which i of course enjoy as well !!!


Actually that's a pretty good idea. If you've got two computers, and a hosting program, she could actually put on a real cam show for "whomever".


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## ankh

Why would she need two PC's?


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## Omgitsjoe

jaquen said:


> Actually that's a pretty good idea. If you've got two computers, and a hosting program, she could actually put on a real cam show for "whomever".


Well ..... she'll put her " show " on for me but often in her mind will imagine herself doing this for someone else. Doubt she'll ever go thru actually doing it but hey its a great form of foreplay for us both since she often is more than ready to go at it after her " show " 

I of course also enjoy very much ahem ahem !


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## jaquen

ankh said:


> Why would she need two PC's?


One for her to do her "show" on, and one for him to watch from another room. That way she doesn't have to sit in the same room and pretend she's webcamming. She can do her "show" on the webcam, while her husband is in another room enjoying the view.


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## jaharthur

jaquen said:


> One for her to do her "show" on, and one for him to watch from another room. That way she doesn't have to sit in the same room and pretend she's webcamming. She can do her "show" on the webcam, while her husband is in another room enjoying the view.


Now that's a good idea!


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## ankh

I guess it seemed odd when you mentioned two pc's to get this going. In our family we each have our own PC, so I assumed the same of others.

Have you floated the idea to her yet, Jaquen?


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## IsItme71

the only thing hard is what he has a handle on???? jump in enjoy the show,participate, only good will come of it, you will benefit in the end....ima dude trust me!!!!! i would love to go round and round even after a shot or two!!!!!!!!!!


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## jaquen

ankh said:


> Have you floated the idea to her yet, Jaquen?


No, I was talking in general. It's a great idea for those who find camming hot.

It's not a personal fantasy of mine.


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## IndyTMI

After pleasuring my wife, she wanted to watch me blow my load on my face. I showed her, completely splattered my face, neck and chest. She bursts out laughing and then demands that she must get it on video. She keeps asking me when I'm going to paint my face. I told her I would so long as she gives me oral to get me there.


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## jaquen

IndyTM said:


> After pleasuring my wife, she wanted to watch me blow my load on my face. I showed her, completely splattered my face, neck and chest. She bursts out laughing and then demands that she must get it on video. She keeps asking me when I'm going to paint my face. I told her I would so long as she gives me oral to get me there.


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## TrustInUs

Omgitsjoe said:


> My wife doesnt do this for me often but sometimes when she's in a very naughty mood she would !! She often fantasizes that she's webcamming with " whomever " as i watch her masturbate and this would get her very turned on ........which i of course enjoy as well !!!





jaquen said:


> Actually that's a pretty good idea. If you've got two computers, and a hosting program, she could actually put on a real cam show for "whomever".


Someone from TAM suggested this to me when I first started here. We sid this on our phones but in two different rooms. Surprisingly, it was pretty fun and hot.


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## jaharthur

jaquen said:


>


:iagree:

Understatement of the year award.


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## phrendlyguy

i used to love masturbating for my wife, now it's just to help myself. It's pretty liberating


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## GinnyTonia

IndyTM, 

I'm on the fence about whether or not you give TMI, but the fact that your avatar is actually you, your face for crying out loud, does not help at all. 

But, by all means, this is a public, sexual issues forum... You be you.


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## jaquen

GinnyTonia said:


> IndyTM,
> 
> I'm on the fence about whether or not you give TMI,


Indy lives for TMI. He had a post recently going into details about the precum stains in his underwear from reading a TAM thread.

He defines TMI. He should rename himself IndyTMI. If you're gonna do it, own it all the way I say.


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## YinPrincess

:rofl:
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## oldgeezer

oldgeezer said:


> I have not done it for my wife, who would be rather disturbed if I did, I think.
> 
> And she seems to not want to talk about or even let on about her masturbating, but I do think she does at least once in a blue moon.
> 
> It's my plan to very gently coax her into the idea of doing some stimulation in my presence, while we're engaged in some intimacy of some kind. Have to break down the barrier she's erected where she says "I feel strange trying to do that".
> 
> The idea is to get her to stop resisting making herself feel good. It's a barrier she's built mentally and I'd prefer to take it down. I know they can be taken down, because she's broken down many of them over the years.
> 
> I'd prefer she were comfortable enough with sexuality that I could walk into the bedroom, find her using a vibrator and it not cause her embarassment.


Since I wrote that post... things have changed completely. 

Certain hangups from the past have been dealt with... and, suddenly, we're not afraid to display our sexuality or wants with each other at all. Not going to change fully overnight, but we've now, on occasion, done it in front of each other. And, we finally allow each other to know what's in our mind. 

There's a lot of baggage in our past, and we've been making an effort to be open. We've finally shared what we think and what enjoy and what is and isn't ok. Taking more than 25 years to do this is a travesty. But we're NOT letting it continue any more.


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## Darkflower

I'd watch if a man wanted me to, but if he asked me if it was a turn on for me, I'd say not particularly. I respond more to tactile stimulation than visual, so it's not that it would turn me off, just that it doesn't turn me ON. If there's an erection in front of my face, I don't get much out of just looking at it, except for maybe just finding it pleasant that he is enjoying doing it.


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## GinnyTonia

jaquen said:


> He should rename himself IndyTMI. If you're gonna do it, own it all the way I say.


Haha! Clever. 
He's an exhibitionist and he knows it. Hi Indy! 

I swear that it is his avatar. 

Would it bother your boundary sensibilities as much if he were more anonymous or if an anonymous female said that reading a provocative thread made her panties wet? 
I think I'd be fine.


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## GinnyTonia

I Hope you're not offended by me on the sex-in-marriage forum. 

Like I said, you do/be you!


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## jaquen

GinnyTonia said:


> Would it bother your boundary sensibilities as much if he were more anonymous or if an anonymous female said that reading a provocative thread made her panties wet?
> I think I'd be fine.


I have very wide boundaries. Don't generally find sex talk to be offensive in the least, even the explicit kind.

I just think there is a time, and a place, for everything. Going into detail about sexual stuff is fine, as long as it has a purpose. But nobody needs to know, in vivid details, about how you came all over your face, chest, or how TAM is making your c*ck leak.

And yes I'd be more comfortable it it were a woman, that's a bias I happily cop to. However if post, after post, after post was going into detail about how your p*ssy juices are dripping down your leg, I'd still think that was way TMI for this board.

And yeah, the pic is creepy. It's no longer anonymous. Every IndyTMI post comes with a instant image of that face, and it's just all too damn much :rofl:!


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## greekbabyyy

I actually asked my boyfriend this as a question. 

I got, "No way. It's disgusting."

Oh well. I thought it would be a turn on and maybe learn ways to please him on how he gets off himself.


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## IndyTMI

I can't stop laughing...:rofl:

I don't think I'm an exhibitionist, I just like to be detailed in my explanations.


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## berlin292

Thanks to all the women who said they like this. This has been a fantasy of mine for years. My STBXW thought the idea was gross.

Hope to do it someday for someone who would really like it.


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## Jax10

So... I did it. Somewhat. I took the advice of whomever said that there should be some sort of discussion first so that my wife wasn't surprised. And I also took the confidence that she might actually like it if I did. 
And it was pretty good. She was intrigued and while I started we ended up making it a couples sport. Fun. Perhaps sometime I can just get her to sit and watch though.... 

And in any case, now I need to work on getting her to do it for me. She has while we are in the moment, but I don't know if the concept of her putting on a show for me would take. Or even if she started and we finished together. Hard to say. But for all those gals whose guys don't want this... I don't know what to say. Crazy to me! I love seeing women touching themselves in an intimate way.


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## ankh

In my most humble opinion, there's nothing quite as intoxicating and arousing, as watching a woman masturbating to a wonderful orgasm.


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## I Notice The Details

ankh said:


> In my most humble opinion, there's nothing quite as intoxicating and arousing, as watching a woman masturbating to a wonderful orgasm.


EXACTLY!!!!!:iagree:

I wish more women embraced this and did this for their husbands.


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## steam

my wife and i both masturbate for each other. sometimes I just aren't getting her off, she will take charge and tell me to watch. other times when wife is performing oral on my scrotum I will masturbate to completion while she watches. we both enjoy doing, watching and being watched by each other


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## 33N 96W

How did we start?

My wife & I masturbated when we were separated (about 40% of the time) and talked about/approved/expected the other masturbate.

A couple of decades ago while I was recovering from knee surgery I asked if she would masturbate if front of me and I would a do the same. Her response was so positive and quick, that I wondered :slap: how long she had thought about or wanted to masturbate for/with me .

Soon we will have been married five decades. Due to physical limitations now, masturbation, solo and mutual is our only mode to orgasm. 

This is one guy's opinion: either increase the frequency of masturbation as you age OR you will have less and less orgasms until you quit completely. Use it or loose it! 
_______________
Suggest a visit to queendom dot com click on polls then Masturbation then Vote then Results. 

Example of a poll question and some responses: "What would you do if your partner started to masturbate in front of you?" 


WOMEN: 2334 voting
I would start laughing: 6.85%
I would leave: 3.17%
I would ask him/her to stop it: 2.95%
I would get upset (crying, feeling angry or hurt):1.75%

MEN: 2484 voting
I would start laughing:1.57%
I would ask him/her to stop it:0.72%
I would get upset (crying, feeling angry or hurt):0.52%
I would leave:0.48%


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## I Notice The Details

berlin292 said:


> Thanks to all the women who said they like this. This has been a fantasy of mine for years. My STBXW thought the idea was gross.
> 
> Hope to do it someday for someone who would really like it.


Berlin292, I hope you can make it happen to fulfill your long time fantasy. I think that most "open minded" people are curious and would peek thru a slightly open door to catch their spouse doing something this private. I know I would. It is my fantasy to "catch" my wife doing it as well...

There are several nights a month when I am in the mood for sex and my wife is just too exhausted. I can tell by her mood and demeanor that sex is the LAST thing on her mind.  She just needs her alone time...and her way to relax is watching a movie in the family room late at night. I am a morning person and go to bed early. I walk in to kiss her goodnight and ask if she will be up very late. She says yes...noticing that I am now wearing some nice silk boxer shorts she recently gave me. I mention that I might need to do some "late night reading" before going to sleep and she smiles from ear to ear. That is our codeword.

Often times she will get up and walk straight into our bedroom and pull out a folder with many "tasteful" pictures of her in lingerie...and put them on my pillow. Several times she has taken off the panties she is wearing at the time and put them on my pillow...and once in a while, she leaves a black, sleeping mask on my pillow, next to a bottle of Astroglide. She always says with a smile..."just leave the door open a crack in case I need to come in....and enjoy yourself"

All of her actions tell me that she likes these occasions, and IS participating in my sexual needs...even though she is not in the mood right now. She understands my higher sex drive, and appreciates that I am driving myself crazy thinking about her! More often than not, she does peek, or come into the room to lend a hand. On the nights she leaves the sleeping mask, I often hear the click of our digital camera while I continue my solo session with the mask on. Her giggles are priceless. 

While all of this may sound weird to others...it is actually liberating to me that she embraces and ENCOURAGES my sexual needs even when she is not in the mood! 

The next time we have "regular" sex, she usually comments about my "late night reading" sessions in a very provocative, positive way. I really appreciate my wife!!!!


----------



## EnjoliWoman

Mutual masturbation is a common act in most people's sexual repertoire.


----------



## EnjoliWoman

33N 96W said:


> WOMEN: 2334 voting
> I would start laughing: 6.85%
> I would leave: 3.17%
> I would ask him/her to stop it: 2.95%
> I would get upset (crying, feeling angry or hurt):1.75%
> 
> MEN: 2484 voting
> I would start laughing:1.57%
> I would ask him/her to stop it:0.72%
> I would get upset (crying, feeling angry or hurt):0.52%
> I would leave:0.48% [/SIZE]


Am I missing something? None of this adds up to 100% of respondents? :scratchhead:


----------



## jaharthur

EnjoliWoman said:


> Am I missing something? None of this adds up to 100% of respondents? :scratchhead:


I noticed that, so I went to the site referenced. Here are the full results:

What would you do if your partner started to masturbate in front of you?

*Women*

I would join in stimulating him/her: 42.71%
I would just watch and enjoy: 18.25%
I would start making love to him/her: 12.76%
I would start masturbating: 11.52%
I would start laughing: 6.85%
I would leave: 3.17%
I would ask him/her to stop it: 2.95%
I would get upset (crying, feeling angry or hurt): 1.75%

Total Votes: 2334

*Men*

I would join in stimulating him/her: 45.89%
I would just watch and enjoy: 20.49%
I would start masturbating: 18.59%
I would start making love to him/her: 11.71%
I would start laughing: 1.57%
I would ask him/her to stop it: 0.72%
I would get upset (crying, feeling angry or hurt): 0.52%
I would leave: 0.48%

Total Votes: 2484


----------



## donny64

Interesting poll. My W has responded each of the top 4 ways, and never any of the bottom 4. 

It has been quite liberating and satisfying to be with such a woman. I have never felt frustrated as a result. There are often times where one or both of us aren't in the mood for full on intercourse (takes a while, messier, etc), but one or both of us are in the mood for something. This is where either solo (with the other present) or mutual masturbation comes in. And it is amazing. 

I'd not be with anyone again who was not ok with that, didn't enjoy that, or thought it disgusting. It is a huge part of our sex life, and we were both missing a lot before (with others).
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## IndyTMI

jaquen said:


> Indy lives for TMI. He had a post recently going into details about the precum stains in his underwear from reading a TAM thread.
> 
> He defines TMI. He should rename himself IndyTMI. If you're gonna do it, own it all the way I say.


Per your suggestion, I contacted the mods and got it changed.


----------



## jaquen

IndyTMI said:


> Per your suggestion, I contacted the mods and got it changed.


:rofl::rofl::rofl:

Classic!


----------



## 33N 96W

greekbabyyy said:


> I actually asked my boyfriend this as a question.
> 
> I got, "No way. It's disgusting."
> 
> Oh well. I thought it would be a turn on and maybe learn ways to please him on how he gets off himself.


A possible followup question would have been 
"If your masturbating in front of me is out of the question,
how about a prostate massage ?"


----------



## greekbabyyy

33N 96W said:


> A possible followup question would have been
> "If your masturbating in front of me is out of the question,
> how about a prostate massage ?"


Haha! I even suggested that. I said, "You may like it!"

He completely denied me... and refuses a finger up the butt at the doctor's office too. 

He's not really the 'kinky' type. :scratchhead:


----------



## I Notice The Details

greekbabyyy said:


> Haha! I even suggested that. I said, "You may like it!"
> 
> He completely denied me... and refuses a finger up the butt at the doctor's office too.
> 
> He's not really the 'kinky' type. :scratchhead:


He's got to accept a little kink now and then...otherwise you will get into a sexual rut.


----------



## ScarletBegonias

I Notice The Details said:


> He's got to accept a little kink now and then...otherwise you will get into a sexual rut.


:iagree:


----------



## Eros Turannos

It took hysterical bonding mixed with a little hypomanic episode for me to break out of my shell and really talk to the husband about masturbation and well.. other things. I was that prude wife who secretly enjoyed watching him more than I let on and refused to admit I had ever done it myself and wouldn't do it for him. I know that the HB and the mania won't last, but I'm hoping the barriers are down for good at least. They really don't serve me well, and I realize that now.



greekbabyyy said:


> Haha! I even suggested that. I said, "You may like it!"
> 
> He completely denied me... and refuses a finger up the butt at the doctor's office too.
> 
> He's not really the 'kinky' type. :scratchhead:


Will he let you play with his "taint" (the area behind his balls, before his butt)? You could see if he's open to that at least. You can try an external prostate massage (no where near the 'real' thing) it may make him re-think things. Just a thought


----------



## 33N 96W

Ahhh how time changes the definition of kinky.

"I would never do...."
or
"I would never use a sex toy!"

Someday becomes
"I wonder what ... would feel like?" 
or
"Would you like to ...?"

Your hubby probably falls into the 7-8% of all married men (masturbating in front of you wife is disgusting).

When I asked my wife if she would join me in a MutMB session, her "yes" came so fast, it was like she was thinking "Why did you take so long to ask me?".

I just read the "refuses a finger up the butt at the doctor's office too". That attitude is not about kinky, and it's not being smart. Prostate Cancer is the No. One Cancer diagnosed among males in the US. PSA screening is not 100% full-proof. DRE is 100%. Together they are two good screening tools in the prostate cancer fight.

After hearing a relative whine yearly about the annual DRE, he was told "it lasted at the most 5-8 seconds, occurred once a year. Stop whining about it, and be glad a Doctor was willing to look at your ugly ... and do a DRE on you".

Would your hubby more likely accept a female physician doing a DRE? I have had guys and gals do the DRE. Two problems with men: too rough & ring size too large.


----------



## Angela Goodnight

I recently started a sex blog and today's subject was getting my husband to masturbate for me and I was searching to see if it had got picked up yet by Google. It hasn't.

However, while I didn't mind masturbating in front of him he was incredibly shy about doing it front of me and, in the end, I had to hijack a sex session and refuse to do anything or let him make love until he masturbated for me. Worked a treat. 

Go for it, it's great fun to watch and you'll learn much about how to apply what he does to foreplay to excite him in the future. Dare say my blog will get picked up eventually.


----------



## I Notice The Details

Just had the DRE by a female Urologist two weeks ago...no big deal at all. They do this all the time, and thankfully, she did have small fingers.


----------



## rush

I have been married 15 plus years, when I first got married I asked my wife what would turn her on, she replied me masterbating in front of her, still have not done that, maybe need to think about it


----------



## I Notice The Details

rush said:


> I have been married 15 plus years, when I first got married I asked my wife what would turn her on, she replied me masterbating in front of her, still have not done that, maybe need to think about it


Rush....you now have your first New Year's Resolution!!!!

My wife will admit that she likes to "spy" on me polishing the stallion. I love to do it, and surely don't mind her watching or lending a hand!


----------



## I Notice The Details

rush said:


> I have been married 15 plus years, when I first got married I asked my wife what would turn her on, she replied me masterbating in front of her, still have not done that, maybe need to think about it


Maybe you should put her in the black director's chair in this photo and have her watch with the lights on you while you perform for her...what would she say to that sexy suggestion?

It could be an "explosive" way to start out your 2014 year!


----------



## larry.gray

rush said:


> I have been married 15 plus years, when I first got married I asked my wife what would turn her on, she replied me masterbating in front of her, still have not done that, maybe need to think about it


Yes you should try it. We don't do it that often but we both find it fun. She puts on a porn show - plays with herself a bit and it gets us both riled up.

She won't do it for me though, and I would love that. She's able to bring herself to orgasm solo, but just can't get there with me watching. She's tried, but can't get relaxed with me watching.


----------



## omgitselaine

CharlieParker said:


> I know you are long distance ATM, so why not start with video chatting?


This i admit works great when my husband is away on business which is almost every other week now it seems so we're able to remain intimate while he's gone  it was very strange the first time but we were able to umm adjust and now get to enjoy very much !!!!


----------



## rush

I Notice The Details said:


> Maybe you should put her in the black director's chair in this photo and have her watch with the lights on you while you perform for her...what would she say to that sexy suggestion?
> 
> It could be an "explosive" way to start out your 2014 year!


Looking for a chair for her behind to sit in, good idea


----------



## rush

CharlieParker said:


> I know you are long distance ATM, so why not start with video chatting?


Unfortunately my wife is not a fan of sexting, so I really doubt if video sexting would work either, The word " sex " has not come up once, but I know she has to miss it, or I hope she does


----------



## askari

I think masturbating is a very intimate and personal thing. To be able to do it with your partner watching must be fantastic because it shows that you are truly connected and 'one'.

I remember doing it infront of a gf many many moons ago...her watching me watching her watching me etc....

I guess its like just staring into each others eyes as you make love....

Boy I hope I find that again before I die...


----------



## rush

I Notice The Details said:


> Maybe you should put her in the black director's chair in this photo and have her watch with the lights on you while you perform for her...what would she say to that sexy suggestion?
> 
> It could be an "explosive" way to start out your 2014 year!


By the way I have a chair now


----------



## I Notice The Details

Awesome Rush. Remember to take your time and enjoy yourself...she will be enjoying it too. Make it last. Maybe get close and back off a few times....edging. Touch and tease everything that feels good. She will be smiling from ear to ear. She might even bring a camera...


----------



## rush

I Notice The Details said:


> Awesome Rush. Remember to take your time and enjoy yourself...she will be enjoying it too. Make it last. Maybe get close and back off a few times....edging. Touch and tease everything that feels good. She will be smiling from ear to ear. She might even bring a camera...


I am very much looking forward to my wifes return here, time is going slow


----------



## I Notice The Details

When does she return?


----------



## rush

Hopefully right after January 19th, Father in laws medical treatment is supposed to end then


----------



## I Notice The Details

You have a lot of time to practice....

My wife loves the fact that I get in the mood by looking at sexy pictures of her. She loves to see how I go from flaccid to full stallion. Some women are curious about these kind of things. My wife never gets tired of watching, spying, or getting hands on...


----------



## Coldie

We'll masturbate each other every now and then just to change things up and keep variety on how we make each other orgasm. I don't see a problem with it and find it fun if done selectively.


----------



## mace85

I Notice The Details said:


> I agree with Holland. My wife loves to watch....sometimes up close in the shower or bedroom, or sometimes thru a slightly open door. There are times that she will initiate this activity by leaving her panties on my pillow, along with some erotic photos of her that we have taken in the past. She will leave a sticky note on the photos to leave the door open just a crack so she can watch. This happens on a night where I really want to have sex but she is not up for it. She understands my high sex drive, and this is one way we compromise. It is all good!



That is amazingly hot. I wish my wife would enjoy something like that.


----------



## Carrie420

Jax10 said:


> Okay. I am not sure if this has been covered quite this way, so if so my apologies.
> 
> However, I have a question. Probably for the women, but maybe for everyone.
> 
> Do you (would you) enjoy watching your spouse masturbate? The reason I ask is that I would like her to watch me. I don't know why, just that I would. I have it in my head that she could watch or join in if she wanted (join in being...whatever she wanted it to be).
> 
> But sometimes fantasy's are better off staying fantasy's...
> 
> So, women, what would you do if your husband asked you to sit down and watch him? Would that be weird? A turn off?
> 
> Thank you.


It wouldn't interest me, I don't think. I like to video tape us doing each other, and watch together afterwards. So I do love to view my husband in action; but only with me.


----------



## bob1471

Not sure if this is weird or not but I've got a thing about it. Wife doesnt mind (she doesnt have to do much!) so it kind of works for both of us.

Anyway, she masturbates me for a little while then I turn her over and do it myself and masturbate onto her butt (sometimes panties on sometimes off). Sometimes not very often its onto the front....

Bit weird I guess but there we go.


----------



## FizzBomb

NotTooSure said:


> Back in the day I used to do this. The first time I did was part of an erotic card game we were playing. I lost a round and the forfeit was to masturbate for her. That is when I discovered that it was a huge turn on for her. Matter of fact we discovered most of what we really enjoyed through such games.


:smthumbup: sounds extremely hot!


----------



## I Notice The Details

I wish my wife would post here....because she really loves watching me do this for her. I think it adds variety and spice in our sex life.


----------



## Amplexor

Darkflower said:


> I'd watch if a man wanted me to, but if he asked me if it was a turn on for me, I'd say not particularly.


How could it not???


----------



## Anon Pink

Amplexor said:


> How could it not???


Now that's sexy!


----------



## southern wife

rush said:


> I have been married 15 plus years, when I first got married I asked my wife what would turn her on, she replied me masterbating in front of her, still have not done that, maybe need to think about it


Dude.......she's been waiting 15 years for this? :wtf:


Get to it! :whip:


----------



## southern wife

Jax10 said:


> *So... I did it.* Somewhat. I took the advice of whomever said that there should be some sort of discussion first so that my wife wasn't surprised. And I also took the confidence that she might actually like it if I did.
> And it was pretty good. She was intrigued and while I started we ended up making it a couples sport. Fun. Perhaps sometime I can just get her to sit and watch though....
> 
> And in any case, now I need to work on getting her to do it for me. She has while we are in the moment, but I don't know if the concept of her putting on a show for me would take. Or even if she started and we finished together. Hard to say. But for all those gals whose guys don't want this... I don't know what to say. Crazy to me! I love seeing women touching themselves in an intimate way.


I love this post and GOOD for you both!


----------



## rush

southern wife said:


> Dude.......she's been waiting 15 years for this? :wtf:
> 
> 
> Get to it! :whip:


Probly waste of time


----------



## Jax10

So...I see that there is a somewhat similar thread on the woman's lounge where a gal wants to see her husband in this way. The thread has quite a few comments. Apparently this is a topic of interest then.

That being said, I have a new question. Do women just want to see a man touch himself or is it a 'go all the way' situation where a man finishes himself. Just curious. Maybe women don't want to see him go all the way?


----------



## NewHubs

I've only masturbated in front of my wife a handful of times and the few times I've done it she always liked the way "I shoot"
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## GinnyTonia

2ntnuf said:


> I know, *women aren't the same as men* and need stimulation of emotions and touch, before they can really get going.


And not all women are the same. I am very visually stimulated. Shoot, all I have to do is think one deliciously dirty thought and I can be ready to go. 

I like to watch until the end for several reasons, but one is that I like to see how he likes to be touched during completion so I can try to duplicate.


----------



## I Notice The Details

GinnyTonia said:


> And not all women are the same. I am very visually stimulated. Shoot, all I have to do is think one deliciously dirty thought and I can be ready to go.
> 
> I like to watch until the end for several reasons, but one is that I like to see how he likes to be touched during completion so I can try to duplicate.


My wife would agree with you GinnyTonia. She says she learns new techniques by watching the "master". :roll eyes:

She also says that watching me start flaccid and slowly proceed all the way to an incredible orgasm involving my entire body is VERY different than what she experiences with her own vibrator. She describes her own self masturbation as...lay down, vibration, orgasm, done. She says it is quick and then it is over. 

Can it be that men's masturbation is more interesting to her because it takes longer????


----------



## Miss Taken

2ntnuf said:


> Do you think it's about the visual of making her horny or just the fact that she wanted to see what was happening inside her? I know, women aren't the same as men and need stimulation of emotions and touch, before they can really get going. Men only need to look to have an erection. So, how can it be that a woman would like to sit back and watch? This whole thread makes no sense to me.


I think, so long as you don't look like Jack Nicholson when you're doing it, it works the same for women as it does for men. I know that I like to watch and it gets me going because it is visually stimulating to see him touch himself. A lot of women also watch porn for the same reasons that men do - because it's visually stimulating and it turns them on. 

In the scope of relationships, women generally do need to feel an emotional connection with someone to want to have sex with them but that's not a hard fast rule either. Otherwise - explain one-night-stands. That takes two people, often total strangers - there is no emotional connection, just attraction and sometimes not even attraction but intoxication. 

Personally speaking, emotional connection is important to me and if I was feeling neglected or used for sex then it's not that I wouldn't want to have sex - it's that I wouldn't necessarily want to have sex with _him_. Still, that doesn't take away the importance of visual stimulation. I'm very visual when it comes to sex, and we even have mirrors in the bedroom that aren't solely for the purpose of seeing what our outfits look like.


----------



## HotLove&Emotion

I love to see men masturbate but whenever I ask my husband to do it for me he never does he always says "it feels better with your hands on it" .. lucky her.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## pierrematoe

Miss Taken said:


> I think, so long as you don't look like Jack Nicholson when you're doing it, it works the same for women as it does for men. I know that I like to watch and it gets me going because it is visually stimulating to see him touch himself. A lot of women also watch porn for the same reasons that men do - because it's visually stimulating and it turns them on.
> 
> In the scope of relationships, women generally do need to feel an emotional connection with someone to want to have sex with them but that's not a hard fast rule either. Otherwise - explain one-night-stands. That takes two people, often total strangers - there is no emotional connection, just attraction and sometimes not even attraction but intoxication.
> 
> Personally speaking, emotional connection is important to me and if I was feeling neglected or used for sex then it's not that I wouldn't want to have sex - it's that I wouldn't necessarily want to have sex with _him_. Still, that doesn't take away the importance of visual stimulation. I'm very visual when it comes to sex, and we even have mirrors in the bedroom that aren't solely for the purpose of seeing what our outfits look like.


Explanation of one-night stands = two people + interesting place (bar, restaurant, nightclub, etc) + alcohol = BA DA BING

Masturbation with the wife is one of my favs. The first time I asked the wife to watch was great. She was very interested in how it all worked. She has helped out sometimes. We went through a period where she would join me and we would watch each other. VERY HOT. The we would take turns doing each other with toys and what not. When I would travel on business she would tell me hot stories of how she got busy with herself in the shower.

Now its like nuclear winter in our bedroom but planning a return to hotter times soon.


----------



## CuddleBug

Jax10 said:


> Okay. I am not sure if this has been covered quite this way, so if so my apologies.
> 
> However, I have a question. Probably for the women, but maybe for everyone.
> 
> Do you (would you) enjoy watching your spouse masturbate? The reason I ask is that I would like her to watch me. I don't know why, just that I would. I have it in my head that she could watch or join in if she wanted (join in being...whatever she wanted it to be).
> 
> But sometimes fantasy's are better off staying fantasy's...
> 
> So, women, what would you do if your husband asked you to sit down and watch him? Would that be weird? A turn off?
> 
> Thank you.



We did this for the first time a short time ago. My wifee asked me, what do you want to try? I said an oiled breast job. She got on her back, I got the baby oil on myself and her breasts. I straddled her, squeezing her breasts together and I partially masturbated until I had my orgam in her breasts. She watched and didn't feel uneasy at all. I think it was more me than her. Then yesterday, my wifee takes me to the bedroom, already has a towel on the bed gets me to lay down. She took off her top, oiled her breasts and me and gave me a breast job. She did this all on her own too. Then I got on top, partially masturbated while in and around her breasts and had my orgasm while she watched. I would say, we are comfortable now about this and next will be an oiled foot job when she asks, what do you want to try? She is passive and I am aggressive, so when she asks, I take charge and lead. Just the way she is.


----------



## loveforfamily

I have been browsing the forums here, learning from both sides of the fence and hello. I wanted to chime in on this. It is something I brought up to my now husband, when we were dating. Mutual masturbating is a really good way to connect in a very vulnerable and very sexual way. It, for me, is like a really fun trust exercise with amazing physical benefits. We essentially are each other's pornography in that moment. We have been known to be pretty open about our own personal activities as well. I approached him on this. Now, you want to know how to approach your wife. Well, I say just approach her. Wanting to share any experience with the person you love comes off well for women, imo. Including masturbating. To me it shows you will share even what is normally a very personal thing and that ultimately you prefer her in all things. Trust me, most women are less "prudish" than they would like to portray themselves. It could open all sorts of doors for you. A lot of women, including myself, May go " awww weird" at first to ideas, but ultimately, once tried, we are screaming and clapping " again again. It wakes up the instincts in us and opens up our own pleasure. Again, an act such as this is a really opening experience. Okay. Hope that made sense.


----------



## I Notice The Details

loveforfamily said:


> I have been browsing the forums here, learning from both sides of the fence and hello. I wanted to chime in on this. It is something I brought up to my now husband, when we were dating. Mutual masturbating is a really good way to connect in a very vulnerable and very sexual way. It, for me, is like a really fun trust exercise with amazing physical benefits. We essentially are each other's pornography in that moment. We have been known to be pretty open about our own personal activities as well. I approached him on this. Now, you want to know how to approach your wife. Well, I say just approach her. Wanting to share any experience with the person you love comes off well for women, imo. Including masturbating. To me it shows you will share even what is normally a very personal thing and that ultimately you prefer her in all things. Trust me, most women are less "prudish" than they would like to portray themselves. It could open all sorts of doors for you. A lot of women, including myself, May go " awww weird" at first to ideas, but ultimately, once tried, we are screaming and clapping " again again. It wakes up the instincts in us and opens up our own pleasure. Again, an act such as this is a really opening experience. Okay. Hope that made sense.


That is AWESOME LoveforFamily!! That made perfect sense to me. :smthumbup:

I am still working on the mutual part in our bedroom. I think I will print out your post and show it to my wife. I hope you don't mind!


----------



## loveforfamily

I Notice The Details said:


> That is AWESOME LoveforFamily!! That made perfect sense to me. :smthumbup:
> 
> I am still working on the mutual part in our bedroom. I think I will print out your post and show it to my wife. I hope you don't mind!


Not at all and I hope it helps. It's a happy thought to think of couples making each other happy in and out of the bedroom. Little shared "naughty" experiences give shared smiles and a knowing later.


----------



## pierrematoe

It's like adult version of show and tell


----------



## CharlotteMcdougall

I do not want to watch my husband masturbate. I find it unsettling and it doesn't turn me on at all. I also prefer masturbating in private. 

My husband gets aroused watching me do it and one evening while we were in bed, he put my hand on my vulva and asked me to touch myself for him. I felt very shy and I told him so. He got all seductively persuasive and I ended up masturbating in front of my husband. I wouldn't do it again as it was too weird for me.


----------



## pierrematoe

Fair enough. I like to get it all out there, lights on, totally naked with no hiding anything. This is me take it or leave it


----------



## loveforfamily

I Notice The Details said:


> That is AWESOME LoveforFamily!! That made perfect sense to me. :smthumbup:
> 
> I am still working on the mutual part in our bedroom. I think I will print out your post and show it to my wife. I hope you don't mind!


It seems like a positive that you can approach your wife or even entertain the idea. Did you manage to bring it all up to her.


----------



## loveforfamily

pierrematoe said:


> Fair enough. I like to get it all out there, lights on, totally naked with no hiding anything. This is me take it or leave it


Sometimes lights are already off and my sweet sweet man turns them on. What this says to me is " I want to see you because I am attracted to you despite what YOU may want to hide and perceive as flaws" ...lights on and have fun. It's forced me to be more comfortable in all out light and putting it out there.


----------



## I Notice The Details

loveforfamily said:


> It seems like a positive that you can approach your wife or even entertain the idea. Did you manage to bring it all up to her.


No, not yet. Timing hasn't been right yet. I am hoping I can this weekend. It is a thrilling idea to me. She loves to watch me do it, but she has to get over her old religious inhibitions and allow me to watch her. I am taking it one step at a time. 

Thanks for you post! I am jealous of you...


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## MaritimeGuy

There are so many benefits to mutual masturbation. It's sad that for some the old prohibitions against it make it uncomfortable for them to now share with their partner. I look at it as a way to see how she likes to be touched and presumably she does the same in return. Not to mention it's hot!


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## NewHubs

I've only done it once for my wife and it was while we were dating. She didn't believe I could "shoot" a lot...well that night I proved her wrong


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## Rugs

Nope, don't want to see it. If I'm there with him why masterbate? Isn't that for when I'm unavailable ??

No thanks.


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## thummper

Absolutely LOVE to watch a woman masturbate to a climax! VERY HOT!! It's one of the sexiest things I could imagine. Not all the time, you understand, but occasionally it's a great turn on.


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## I Notice The Details

thummper said:


> Absolutely LOVE to watch a woman masturbate to a climax! VERY HOT!! It's one of the sexiest things I could imagine. Not all the time, you understand, but occasionally it's a great turn on.


:iagree: 1 million percent. I would love to watch her masturbate while I give her an incredible, erotic foot massage. Damn....that would be so HOT! :smthumbup:


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## loveforfamily

Rugs said:


> Nope, don't want to see it. If I'm there with him why masterbate? Isn't that for when I'm unavailable ??
> 
> No thanks.


I get this, however, there seems to be this .....looking for a word...stigma about things outside penetration when you can simply just have sex. Intimacy comes in so many varieties. It's not always about the O. It's about how you get there and why. Being absolutely vulnerable and open, for me is intoxicating. I swear it kicks my husbands pheromones into hypertensive, which in turn drives me closer to him. I equate it to the same put off of pheromones that happens to a m when he is working hard. I don't mean behind a desk. I mean lawn etc. I like the idea that we don't just expect to have penetration and other options are available because he wants to be with me and have me in his mind. I know in this act he is only thinking of me. So, he is with me there. Usually we are so turned on, after recovery from round one, there is a round two OR that act is the encore because we are still willing but a bit tired and still want that"togetherness".


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## I Notice The Details

loveforfamily said:


> I get this, however, there seems to be this .....looking for a word...stigma about things outside penetration when you can simply just have sex. Intimacy comes in so many varieties. It's not always about the O. It's about how you get there and why. Being absolutely vulnerable and open, for me is intoxicating. I swear it kicks my husbands pheromones into hypertensive, which in turn drives me closer to him. I equate it to the same put off of pheromones that happens to a m when he is working hard. I don't mean behind a desk. I mean lawn etc. I like the idea that we don't just expect to have penetration and other options are available because he wants to be with me and have me in his mind. I know in this act he is only thinking of me. So, he is with me there. Usually we are so turned on, after recovery from round one, there is a round two OR that act is the encore because we are still willing but a bit tired and still want that"togetherness".



That is very well said LoveforFamily....masturbation provides a lot pleasure and requires vulnerability and guts. It also requires trust. It is very liberating to me when I do it for my wife. It gives couples some needed sexual variety in my opinion. I think it is great, and a lot of fun. Besides, I have had years of practicing this skill on my own...so why not let her watch and get turned on by it!


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## pierrematoe

Let's face it, being vulnerable and exposing your raw emotions with the person you love is very powerful

Sexual release added into that is extremely arousing

Intercourse not required


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## omgitselaine

If a guy wants to watch me masturbate ......... and quite a few had ahem ahem I've never deprived him of viewing me in this vulnerable state of mind !?

If anything it's a huge turnon knowing he's watching my every movement and that it will be etched in his memory forever ........... and oh also being somewhat of an exhibitionist I guess helps  !?!?!?


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## I Notice The Details

omgitselaine said:


> If a guy wants to watch me masturbate ......... and quite a few had ahem ahem I've never deprived him of viewing me in this vulnerable state of mind !?
> 
> If anything it's a huge turnon knowing he's watching my every movement and that it will be etched in his memory forever ........... and oh also being somewhat of an exhibitionist I guess helps  !?!?!?


That is so powerful and erotic elaine! I admire your confidence. Confidence is very sexy.


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## rush

omgitselaine said:


> If a guy wants to watch me masturbate ......... and quite a few had ahem ahem I've never deprived him of viewing me in this vulnerable state of mind !?
> 
> If anything it's a huge turnon knowing he's watching my every movement and that it will be etched in his memory forever ........... and oh also being somewhat of an exhibitionist I guess helps  !?!?!?


Geeze!


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## over20

omgitselaine said:


> If a guy wants to watch me masturbate ......... and quite a few had ahem ahem I've never deprived him of viewing me in this vulnerable state of mind !?
> 
> If anything it's a huge turnon knowing he's watching my every movement and that it will be etched in his memory forever ........... and oh also being somewhat of an exhibitionist I guess helps  !?!?!?


You rock girl!!


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## pierrematoe

Elaine for President


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## omgitselaine

I Notice The Details said:


> That is so powerful and erotic elaine! I admire your confidence. Confidence is very sexy.





rush said:


> Geeze!





over20 said:


> You rock girl!!





pierrematoe said:


> Elaine for President


What better way to stay inside a guy's head than by giving him a ummmmmm " show " he will never forget  As you can see not many women would volunteer to do something like this ........ thus it only makes me even more ummmm " special "


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## pierrematoe

I'm picturing a show in my head right now starring Elaine


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## omgitselaine

pierrematoe said:


> I'm picturing a show in my head right now starring Elaine


Ummmmmm


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## pierrematoe

Thanks Elaine...lol


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## jaharthur

Now we know why the first three letters of her screen name are OMG.


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## pierrematoe

That's orgasm more girl right?


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## omgitselaine

*Re: Re: Masturbating for your spouse*



pierrematoe said:


> That's orgasm more girl right?


You bet


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## joe kerr

I am fine to watch my wife. Just recently when the little friend was in town, she did it in front of me while I assisted with a couple of other areas. She was concerned I would be weirded out, but no such problem. It was incredibly erotic
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## onedge

I don't mind taking over while he concentrates on other areas like a light feathery tickle of thighs and stomach. Talk about a whole body orgasm.


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## omgitselaine

Another take on this topic is........... ummmmm leaving a short video on my husband's cell phone to somehow find later this week when he goes away yet again on business  

I hope , hope he doesnt stumble upon it before or during a meeting  !!!


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## rush

omgitselaine said:


> Another take on this topic is........... ummmmm leaving a short video on my husband's cell phone to somehow find later this week when he goes away yet again on business
> 
> I hope , hope he doesnt stumble upon it before or during a meeting  !!!


what a gift to find on your phone


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## omgitselaine

rush said:


> what a gift to find on your phone


It's actually a " gift " for our marriage 

It's difficult enough for him to be away from ummmm me and the 2 little boys ............. so why not remind him what he has to come home to sooner or later


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## rush

omgitselaine said:


> It's actually a " gift " for our marriage
> 
> It's difficult enough for him to be away from ummmm me and the 2 little boys ............. so why not remind him what he has to come home to sooner or later


I understand, I just get dinner if I am lucky usually


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## NewHubs

Joe is one lucky SOB! ;-)
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## omgitselaine

NewHubs said:


> Joe is one lucky SOB! ;-)
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Truust me dude .............. remind him often enough for him to never forget this


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## samyeagar

omgitselaine said:


> Another take on this topic is........... ummmmm leaving a short video on my husband's cell phone to somehow find later this week when he goes away yet again on business
> 
> *I hope , hope he doesnt stumble upon it before or during a meeting*  !!!


Oh, my STBW knows my meeting schedules, and often likes to distract me with a pic or vid at just the right time...


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## omgitselaine

samyeagar said:


> Oh, my STBW knows my meeting schedules, and often likes to distract me with a pic or vid at just the right time...


Understood ............. he sends me a schedule of his meetings and whatnot each week before departing but Im just afraid he looks at a video at the wrong time and ummmmmm accidentally allows everyone to hear something they ............. shouldnt had  !??!?!?!


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## I Notice The Details

NewHubs said:


> Joe is one lucky SOB! ;-)
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


:iagree::iagree::iagree:


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## omgitselaine

NewHubs said:


> Joe is one lucky SOB! ;-)
> _Posted via Mobile Device_





I Notice The Details said:


> :iagree::iagree::iagree:


Dudes ..... you can be too  !!!???


Get your minds out of the gutter uummmmm .............have your wives to do the same thing on your phones ..... I meant  !?!?!?


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## rush

omgitselaine said:


> Dudes ..... you can be too  !!!???
> 
> 
> Get your minds out of the gutter uummmmm .............have your wives to do the same thing on your phones ..... I meant  !?!?!?


My wife is too timid :scratchhead:


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## NewHubs

rush said:


> My wife is too timid :scratchhead:


Ditto on that


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## omgitselaine

rush said:


> My wife is too timid :scratchhead:





NewHubs said:


> Ditto on that


Hmmmmm ........................ I guess this makes me not so ummmm " timid " then  ??


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## mace85

oldgeezer said:


> I have not done it for my wife, who would be rather disturbed if I did, I think.
> 
> 
> 
> And she seems to not want to talk about or even let on about her masturbating, but I do think she does at least once in a blue moon.
> 
> 
> 
> It's my plan to very gently coax her into the idea of doing some stimulation in my presence, while we're engaged in some intimacy of some kind. Have to break down the barrier she's erected where she says "I feel strange trying to do that".
> 
> 
> 
> The idea is to get her to stop resisting making herself feel good. It's a barrier she's built mentally and I'd prefer to take it down. I know they can be taken down, because she's broken down many of them over the years.
> 
> 
> 
> I'd prefer she were comfortable enough with sexuality that I could walk into the bedroom, find her using a vibrator and it not cause her embarassment.



I feel your pain. Unfortunately my wife doesn't seem willing in the least bit to do it with me, or even consider it on her own. I can't even really get her to talk about sex without using clinical terms. I am getting tired of being the only one who acts like sex is anything other than a dry run at procreation. 

She will let me get off around her if I am in the mood and she's not, but it's usually nothing more than whipping a boob out while she's watching TV. She seems to have no interest at all.


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## I Notice The Details

therosenberg said:


> Well, this is an old thread, but it's an interesting question.
> 
> Yes, my husband and I love to masturbate for each other. It's sexy and a lot of fun. I do it for him to watch very often and it really turns me on. I prefer it when we masturbate together, just watching each other. That really gets me going.
> 
> So, yeah! Absolutely!



That is awesome Therosenberg! I wish my wife was more comfortable doing this in front of me. I think it is extremely sexy! 

Do you just happen to let him walk in while you are doing it, or do you tell him to sit back and watch...how do you initiate this wonderful experience with your very lucky husband?


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## therosenberg

I Notice The Details said:


> That is awesome Therosenberg! I wish my wife was more comfortable doing this in front of me. I think it is extremely sexy!
> 
> Do you just happen to let him walk in while you are doing it, or do you tell him to sit back and watch...how do you initiate this wonderful experience with your very lucky husband?


Feel free to call me Zazil 

It really depends, we don't have a set routine for anything. Sometimes he walks in on me while I'm masturbating and he just sits there to watch. Other times, when we're having sex and he needs a moment to reload, I like to masturbate for him. That gets him going again in a matter of minutes. It's a lot of fun, really.

May I ask why your wife doesn't feel comfortable masturbating in front of you? I'm curious. I would like to understand. It's ok if you don't want to share. I hope you don't mind me asking, I tend to be very inquisitive.


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## naiveonedave

mine won't, she says it is too personal. Ugh.


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## therosenberg

naiveonedave said:


> mine won't, she says it is too personal. Ugh.


Ok, then I need to ask, and please let me know if I'm crossing the line or you just don't feel like sharing, but... she has sex with you, right? How can masturbating in front of you be too personal?

I'm not judging, I would just like to understand.


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## naiveonedave

yes we have a lot of sex. I show her how to improve HJ technique by showing her, so I've done it for her multiple times. I don't get it, literally and figuratively.


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## I Notice The Details

therosenberg said:


> Feel free to call me Zazil
> 
> It really depends, we don't have a set routine for anything. Sometimes he walks in on me while I'm masturbating and he just sits there to watch. Other times, when we're having sex and he needs a moment to reload, I like to masturbate for him. That gets him going again in a matter of minutes. It's a lot of fun, really.
> 
> May I ask why your wife doesn't feel comfortable masturbating in front of you? I'm curious. I would like to understand. It's ok if you don't want to share. I hope you don't mind me asking, I tend to be very inquisitive.


I think she has to overcome some old inhibitions, some old religious beliefs, the way her step Mom raised her....and the fact that "good girls" aren't supposed to do this kind of thing. 

I personally think it comes down to self confidence and just relaxing and losing yourself in the pleasure. I do it for her whenever she requests...but she says she is still too SHY. 

Eitherway, your husband is VERY lucky! Good for you two.


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## mace85

therosenberg said:


> Feel free to call me Zazil
> 
> 
> 
> It really depends, we don't have a set routine for anything. Sometimes he walks in on me while I'm masturbating and he just sits there to watch. Other times, when we're having sex and he needs a moment to reload, I like to masturbate for him. That gets him going again in a matter of minutes. It's a lot of fun, really.
> 
> 
> 
> May I ask why your wife doesn't feel comfortable masturbating in front of you? I'm curious. I would like to understand. It's ok if you don't want to share. I hope you don't mind me asking, I tend to be very inquisitive.



I think part of it she doesn't believe that I find her attractive. Her body image issues are insane. After 12 years I can't manage to even put a dent in it. Another reason is most likely her "Texas Belle" aristocratic mother who pounded the role of a "lady" into her. But the only excuse I get is "I just don't like doing that". She outright denies that she masterbates at all. And as far as I can tell she probably doesn't. I can't get her to even entertain the conversation of why she doesn't like it. Just that she doesn't like it and that's the end of the discussion.


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## omgitselaine

Taking this to the the current 21st Century technology with skype and whatnot !!

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/8176425-post38.html

Not as good as the " real deal " in your face but it ummmm ..... works


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## edgya1234

Jax10 said:


> But how do you start it? Would it be weird if I just invited her in to the bedroom and started some kissing and then jus went with it?
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


How do you start? Good question. I'm telling you what my husband did and it was a major turn on. Foreplay until she is on the brink and then stop, delayed gratification In that moment she will accept any form of further sexual stimulation: in your case a visual one such as masturbation.
Believe me, I am a woman, married, I know what I am talking about.


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## Jax10

Masturbation is such an intimate thing if you think about it. It is scary to expose ourselves to others. Part of that is the culture of shame for both genders.

But I also think that is part of the eroticism and the appeal to me. It is so taboo and to do it in front of your spouse (S/O) just puts yourself out there.

As for the folks who don't want to see it, I think part of that is to let your spouse do their thing, let them do it for themselves with you as an audience. And as for the ones who want to do it, but don't quite have the courage, I have come to appreciate that women don't take sex nearly as seriously as men think (I mean that as a compliment). With women a lot of the time they are glad to do things for their spouse and this could include watching. And I think for women, most men will find it a wild turn on to watch.

On my side, we've made progress. I've gotten more comfortable doing this once in a while. I think at some point I'd simply like to start and finish with her just watching, but I don't think she'd like that much (not a bad thing. We end up doing the couples sport from there) Whereas I would absolutely love for her to do it while I watch. 'Course I'd want a finish too.


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## CharlieParker

omgitselaine said:


> Taking this to the the current 21st Century technology with skype and whatnot !!
> 
> http://talkaboutmarriage.com/8176425-post38.html
> 
> Not as good as the " real deal " in your face but it ummmm ..... works


I'll just add "travel" could mean to another part of the house.


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## over20

CharlieParker said:


> I'll just add "travel" could mean to another part of the house.


:smthumbup::smthumbup:


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## KLP

First thing in the morning I'll kneel on the bed and masturbate while watching my wife showering or getting dressed. She doesn't jump in and help but I know she's thinking about what I'm doing coz she turns to watch at the moment I cum. It's such a turn on for me watching her just going about doing her thing and me jerking it off. She is really cool with it. I'm not sure how it started, I think I just did it to gauge her response once and have been doing it ever since


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## jaybee2000

To introduce his wife to watching him masturbate, the husband should fake a climax during sex and then while lying together he can start playing with his still erect penis. His wife should be satisfied from their love-making session and he can tell her he just needs to release some more semen as he didn't fully ejaculate. This was how my wife and I started to enjoy mutual masturbation.


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