# When you get a big clue why your husband does not want sex



## blueskies30 (Jan 27, 2010)

My husband has just given me a big clue why he has not wnted sex as often as he used too. WE used to do it 3-5 times per week and he used to very suggestive of new postions, outfits and more stuff. Then it drastically declined until we were in a no sex marraige. 

He would talk about sex all day and reallly get me going, but at night he had no interest like his conversations and flirting with me had never happened. 

Our new years resolution is to get fit and healthy. He has resently opened up to me a lot!! His words to me yesterday says a lot about why he is hesitant about love making. He said "why would you want 200 pounds of slop on top of you?"

I never realized he has felt so bad about himself for years. He is determined to get fit and he really only has 20-30lbs to lose. We are working together to get fit. I almost go tot eh gym everytime with him, except for lately cause I have been sick. He says by the end of this summer I will be sore.

Our relationship started in 99 with the best sex I have ever had. We were matched in every way. I'm wanting to dress up again like I used too. I hope he wants to get into things like before, but even better! We never did oral a lot. He asked for it from me, but he would not do it on me. I never was a fan of oral on him, but now I want to try more things.


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## SimplyAmorous (Nov 25, 2009)

When you get fit and thin, it just makes you feel sexier. Work out together , ride bikes in the summer, go for long walks, so worth the effort, the sweat, and better eating habits. The sex will definitely pick up. 



> We never did oral a lot. He asked for it from me, but he would not do it on me. I never was a fan of oral on him, but now I want to try more things


 And go for the oral - with gusto. Here is a great book to give you some amazing tips, the book itself turned me on >>Amazon.com: Passionista: The Empowered Woman's Guide to Pleasuring a Man (9780060834395): Ian Kerner: Books

I denied my husband that gift for 19 yrs of our marraige- accually he never asked for it -- now can't get enough, so it is never too late to start.... he never thought he would see the day, I am kicking myself now -for not doing it all of these years, especially when he was younger, hotter and more horny.


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## bossesgirl26 (Jun 19, 2011)

Yeah you gotta keep your weight down. My husband is 6"5. 285lbs. Trust me, he is heavy and big. But I would never say anything. But if I start gaining I gain in my belly. He is the first to nicely point it out to me. He will act like he's giving me a hard time. Then if in a few weeks I am not losing/trying, I get the next kinda joking around. Like he will come home from shift (he's police officer) and he will ask me what I did that day. Then I will get a smack on the ass and he will kinda jokingly say "well you better get your ass to the gym." Usually that does the trick. It doesn't seem fair, he can get a bit of belly but I never say anything.


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## shy_guy (Jan 25, 2012)

bossesgirl26 said:


> Yeah you gotta keep your weight down. My husband is 6"5. 285lbs. Trust me, he is heavy and big. But I would never say anything. But if I start gaining I gain in my belly. He is the first to nicely point it out to me. He will act like he's giving me a hard time. Then if in a few weeks I am not losing/trying, I get the next kinda joking around. Like he will come home from shift (he's police officer) and he will ask me what I did that day. Then I will get a smack on the ass and he will kinda jokingly say "well you better get your ass to the gym." Usually that does the trick. It doesn't seem fair, he can get a bit of belly but I never say anything.


You can't invite him to get his ass to the gym with you? Sounds like an open door for such an invitation.


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## bossesgirl26 (Jun 19, 2011)

@shy guy: Riiiight. That would be an open invitation to me getting an ass pounding and belt spanking for being disrespectful. I could probably get away with it if I were going to gym on regular basis. My husband lifts weights, but still can get tiny belly. He keeps his weight under control for most part. He has to keep in shape for his job. We have tried working out together. It is just hard with our schedules. And he knows everyone and talks forever. I like to go with my girlfriends and have fun. He will be watching me too much to see what I am doing, etc. We do go on walks at home, etc with kids


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## CantBeJustMe (Jan 27, 2012)

bossesgirl26 said:


> @shy guy: Riiiight. That would be an open invitation to me getting an ass pounding and belt spanking for being disrespectful. I could probably get away with it if I were going to gym on regular basis. My husband lifts weights, but still can get tiny belly. He keeps his weight under control for most part. He has to keep in shape for his job. We have tried working out together. It is just hard with our schedules. And he knows everyone and talks forever. I like to go with my girlfriends and have fun. He will be watching me too much to see what I am doing, etc. We do go on walks at home, etc with kids


I hope you're joking about the "Ass pounding" and "belt spanking"...unless you enjoy that. Hey, some people do. No skin of my ass.

But 6'5" and 285lbs? "Tiny" belly? I'm 6'3" and 250lbs. I want (WILL) hit 230lbs before Summer. No one I know would call me fat, even if I wasn't in the room when they said it, but that doesn't mean I'm in shape.


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