# Am I crazy?



## brokenmarine (Apr 21, 2014)

My wife and I have been married for almost 6 years and this past week my wife and I have been going back and forth about divorce. We decided to do it and filled and went on. Later in the week she got drunk and revealed that she cheated on me. I confronted her about it and she lied a couple of times before finally coming clean. It's driving me nuts and I'm trying to figure it out. I still love her and everything we had together but I don't know what to do about it... Any advice?

_Posted via *Topify* on Android_


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## walkonmars (Aug 21, 2012)

keep the divorce going - 
If I were in your boots, I'd find out who, and how many she was involved with. Or do you know already?


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## WhiteRaven (Feb 24, 2014)

1) How many OMs?
2) How long was the A?
3) Who else knows about the A?
4) Do you have kids?
5) Do you know the OM?
6) Who is the breadwinner?
7) How have you verified if she has told the entire truth?
8) Have you exposed the A?
9) What was your first thought- stay or leave?


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## Pepper123 (Nov 27, 2012)

From a woman's perspective, I would assume that after she cheated she felt that D was imminent at some point, and letting go of the relationship under other pretenses was easier for her to stomach. She may have felt that she had ruined her marriage already, but doesn't want to be known as a cheater. "Things just fell apart" sounds so much better than, "She f***ed another man." 

Assuming it was just one AP, is it a deal breaker for you? Do you think the outlying reasons that YOU felt you were filing had anything to do with her having a guilty conscience? What were the other issues... the ones that you thought you were filing for D over? 

Email and cell phone bills are usually a good place to start.


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## Graywolf2 (Nov 10, 2013)

Pepper123 said:


> From a woman's perspective, I would assume that after she cheated she felt that D was imminent at some point, and letting go of the relationship under other pretenses was easier for her to stomach. She may have felt that she had ruined her marriage already, but doesn't want to be known as a cheater. "Things just fell apart" sounds so much better than, "She f***ed another man."


:iagree:


Did you want a divorce or did she talk you into it? 

The WS has to do most of the work for R. It sound as if she already gave up on the marriage. If you want to R tell her and she what she does.

If you wanted a divorce there is no reason to stop because you found out she cheated.


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## Chris989 (Jul 3, 2012)

If you've filed for divorce, I don't see why she would answer your questions. She might, although she might also just tell you a pack of lies?

As you know she cheated on you and you're only six years in and sounds like you have no children, then maybe you just dodged a bigger bullet.


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## Acoa (Sep 21, 2012)

You filed for divorce. You should be done worrying about her, chalk it up as confirmation that divorcing her was the correct choice. Focus on you now. Look up the 180. Live it, love it.


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## brokenmarine (Apr 21, 2014)

WhiteRaven said:


> 1) How many OMs?
> 2) How long was the A?
> 3) Who else knows about the A?
> 4) Do you have kids?
> ...


One
It was a one time drunken thing.
me her my brother and one of her girlfriends she talks to for support
2 Kids which are my biggest concern to be honest
No I dont know him he is an old high school friend of hers they have never been involved romantically before this
I am fully supporting her until she is able to get a job even then i will be providing a decent amount of support
I have the fully story I know about everything and I fully trust that she has told me everything
Yes it was exposed sunday two days after we filed
I dont know to be perfectly honest because I had suspicions and a little evidence of something going on but wasnt sure of the etxtent I love her and she is and has been my entire world and its hard to imagine not having her around but I know if i cant get past this happening it wont matter we wont have a future.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

Keep the divorce going and never let your old lady see you cry...chicks dig confident men so show her one by letting her see you will not tolorate her crap.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

Dude I have been here long enough to know you are only getting a small fraction to the degree of disrespect she had for this marriage!

The women you married is not the same women that betrayed you. The women you married died.

God forbid she tell the truth and you go out a kill Jodi.....

I bet its a matter of hours before she starts bringing her "new' friend around to meet family and friends!!!


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## MattMatt (May 19, 2012)

You might not know the full story. There might be more than one AP.

Get checked for STDs and get DNA checks on your children.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

Start doing the 180....

no more "I love you's"

Its time to distance your self from your old lady....trust me its for your own emotional protection.

She has your number and she will continue to mind phuck you!!! So don't let her have that control over you.

She will play your emotions if you let her in.


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## brokenmarine (Apr 21, 2014)

Sorry I was scant on the details but its a lot to put down ill give more insight into things now that Ive had a bit of time to process

Weve been married for 6 years have 2 kids together, Im in the military and up until about 2 months ago we were together and determined to stick it out. Im in a really tough duty station now where I work upwards of 18 hours a day 7 days a week as a drill instructor. I have been working this job for nearly a year and have admittedly not been there like i should be as a husband emotionally and intimately. Due to financial problems that arise, namely she was not able to get a job within her field of paralegal we couldn't afford for her and the kids to stay here because rent + daycare drained our funds so 2 months ago we made the decision to move her and the kids back home to washington state where she is living with family until she can get a job and move into her own place. The A happened about two weeks after she moved. She told me once she got there she went to a bar with the intention of sleeping with someone because she felt overwhelmed with everything and wanted to not care for a night. Nothing happened that night but then she met this old friend of hers. She went to his house and they got drunk and it happened. She knew she was feeling lonely, she knows how she gets when drunk, and she knew that they would be alone so yes she made the choice about what happened. The divorce issue was decided because yes we love each other and care for each other but knew that if we stayed together married then the seperation would kill us. we would end up fighting, argueing and eventually ahting each other with would cause problems for the kids as well as us and we didnt want that. We figure that yea were getting divorced now but it might give us an opportunity in the future to try again once i am out of the military in 1-2 years. Friday we filed and sunday she revealed it to me. I had bugged her phone so I knew that there was something going on and finally got her to admit it. She is extremely remorseful but lied several times about it. I still want her and she still wants me its just i dont know what exactly were going to do... strange as it sounds the divorce had nothing to do with the cheating at least on the surface. She felt extremely guilty and that may have led to to divorce in some way. I know this doesnt make sense that the reactions are what usually happens but we are not a standard couple.
hope this helps with the advice giving and thanks for those of you who have already gave advice


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

well since you have intel in place then it sounds like I was wrong...you may have gotten the full story.

Is she still in contact with the POS?


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## Dyokemm (Apr 24, 2013)

OP,

Sorry you are here.

My advice is to follow through with the D and move on.

Detach emotionally.

Trying to R while separated long distance will just lead you to more angst and pain.

She selfishly decided to take an action that ended your M just two weeks into the separation.

Sorry to say this, but your old M is now dead, and it will be impossible to rebuild it at long distance.

Detach and move on to find a W who understands loyalty.


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## brokenmarine (Apr 21, 2014)

the guy said:


> well since you have intel in place then it sounds like I was wrong...you may have gotten the full story.
> 
> Is she still in contact with the POS?


yeah and shes still covering it up a bit she said last night that she wasnt going to go see him i asked her not to because i know wht kind of state shes in and know that he might try to take advantage of it but after she said she wouldnt she did go see him again according to her gps. I made an attempt to get her to admit it by asking to chat with our kids and she said she was going to her brothers house for a while. I want to believe that nothing happened which i know is the romantic/wishful thinking in me but I know her pretty well and theres always a chance that she did just go to talk and whatnot she wasnt drinking or anything while there and wasnt there for all night or anything like that but her lying is continuing which makes me doubt that theres a chance in the future, if i cant trust her then its impossible to work. theres time before the d is final the final hearing isnt until july so at this point im just working on stabilization myself and my emotions because i know its important not to make big rash decisions when im so of kilter. I firmly believe that there's a possibility of us working things out and i firmly believe that it was a one time thing. doesnt make it right at all and yeah she made the decision it is 95% her fault so im not blaming myself. i dont know i guess i just bide my time for now


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## walkonmars (Aug 21, 2012)

Please don't delude yourself. She didn't go there to "talk", she didn't go there to "compare recipes", she didn't go there to "catch up" .... 

She's probably not telling you about him for a variety of reasons - but she likely feels that since the divorce is in the works - she's free to do as she pleases - with no guilt and doesn't feel a need to ask for permission or in anyway be indebted to you. 

I suppose you'll be kissing a large portion of your retirement income away? That's what she wants to ensure is secure - not your ego. 

Stay strong. Look out for yourself and your kids only. Stop collecting intel and let her go.


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## MovingAhead (Dec 27, 2012)

The faults in the marriage are 50% yours.

Her cheating is 100% her fault.

You don't 'chat' with someone you think may have led to the end of your marriage, but you fvck someone who you think can be your savior out of the marriage you are leaving... just sayin...

Look at her skeptically. Anything that you think is a lie, probably is now. Trust your gut.


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## Pepper123 (Nov 27, 2012)

Honest opinion, and I know that I will be against the grain here... but if you do love her and have even an inkling of saving your marriage, then I think you can.

Since you are military, couldn't you live on base to save some money? Initially I wanted to suggest looking for something outside of her field, but considering her boundary issues I'm not sure that'd be a good idea. The separation between the two of you at an already very trying time was a bad idea; I think you know that now. 

As a single mom that spends some of the holidays away from my kids... and was not the parent to get the first lost tooth... I can tell you it is always worth saving if you have kids and love her... but don't stay just for the kids if you don't have it in you to forgive. 

You've put yourselves in a real pickle separating... she needs to come back if you want a chance. Otherwise... work out a good custody schedule for holidays, as it sounds like the only time you will ever see your children.


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## Mostlycontent (Apr 16, 2014)

brokenmarine said:


> One
> It was a one time drunken thing.
> me her my brother and one of her girlfriends she talks to for support
> 2 Kids which are my biggest concern to be honest
> ...



Not to pile on but I've seen this mentioned a lot with the BS. I think this is the first big mistake a lot of men make. You can't make your W your whole world and responsible for virtually all of your self esteem. Not only does that completely feed into a Co-dependent situation but attaching so much of your self worth to another human being will always lead to disappointment.

I believe that we get our self worth from our Creator and we get self esteem by doing esteem-able things. No person can give you those things and so many men, and women too I'm sure, look to their spouses for that validation and it just can't be done.


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## poida (Jan 17, 2014)

So ultimately, the cause of loneliness was that you were away for significant periods of time?

If so, I would say that some people can deal with this and others can't. It comes down to personal security and ability to live alone happily during those times. 

If this is the reason, and that the WW isn't one suited well to living alone for periods of time, then my advice would be to continue D as this is not something that changes, and if it does, it takes years and years.


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## Dyokemm (Apr 24, 2013)

"Not to pile on but I've seen this mentioned a lot with the BS. I think this is the first big mistake a lot of men make. You can't make your W your whole world and responsible for virtually all of your self esteem."

I agree.

Desperation to 'fix' the M fast and 'get things back to the way they were before' is the biggest mistake many BS make in the days after discovering the betrayal.

The old M is DEAD...there is no going back.

If a M is to continue, it must be totally rebuilt as a new relationship.

And that will never work with a WS who continues the A with the POS AP and continues to deceive and lie.

Your best chance OP, is to continue the D and refuse to interact with her unless it concerns kids or the D process.

She has to see and feel that she is about to lose everything she had in her life and M PERMANENTLY.

Only this will sometimes snap a WS out of their fantasyland.


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## Acoa (Sep 21, 2012)

kappelxir said:


> I would assume that after she cheated she felt that D was imminent at some point.



She may be feeling guilty (as she should). The divorce may be because she wants to continue the A, but either can't handle
The guilt or is afraid for the AP. Many men take a dim view of guys who cheat with military wives. In either case it's showing you some respect by divorcing you before she keeps sleeping around.

How long have you been in the military? Long periods away are part of the package. Her moving away was a mistake. She should have stuck it out a few more years in an unrelated field, at least you could be together each night. 

And yeah, get legal council ASAP. I assume by her moving back home that means out of state? That is going to make custody and to some degree even visitation difficult for you.

Change your thinking from you "love her" to you "loved her". Now worry about the kids and yourself. She will in all likelihood get custody. Be generous with child support and fight for her to get as little alimony as possible. Stay involved as much as possible with you kids, but keep her out of that. 

She set up the chess board in her favor, don't let her checkmate you without putting up a fight.


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## Chaparral (Jul 17, 2011)

YOU need to check this guy out. If you are getting info from your wife about him you can discount that.

Put him on cheaterville.com and send him, his family and your wife the link.

Yes they are still hooking up. Get out of denial, its your second biggest problem.

Talk to the professionals in at your base, they can help.

Thorburn is an ex military counselor, private message him.

Good luck and thank you.

Btw, he wants to cheat with married women, let him wear it. Everytime someone googles his name, the cheaterville link will come up.


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## weightlifter (Dec 14, 2012)

PUT THAT POS who doinked a military mans wife WHILE ON DUTY on CHEATERVILLE.com! NOW DAMMIT!

Then email a copy to his boss and all his neighbors.

They really need to bring back paramour laws.


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## weightlifter (Dec 14, 2012)

ugh gotta leave TAM for a few hours. That one boiled my blood.

Someone post my standard instruction set for OP.

Ill be back. just gotta calm down.


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## Forest (Mar 29, 2014)

BrokenMarine,

If its intel and instructions on how to get it you need, Weightlifter (above) has it down to a science. Skim thru his posts, he copies/pastes it often.

Deals with Voice Activated recorders, placement, etc.


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## Graywolf2 (Nov 10, 2013)

My son is an army JAG (lawyer) and you have a very stressful job. A trainee can get a drill instructor in big trouble by just reporting him. Never be alone with a trainee, they lie.

If you divorce you will lose pay and some housing allowance. Your wife will also have to buy her own heath insurance if you divorce. 

Your wife has already cheated and you stil may want to get back together someday. Just stay married for the money until you figure things out.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

You know she is still contacting OM, you know she is still lying her @ss off to you.....why look at the GPS tracker every day? 

You need to detach..oh wait... keep checking its just a matter of time when you see her over there every damn night.

Maybe the pain of seeing this will give you the drive to see she is to far gone.

At the end of the day a guy can only take so much pain by seeing his old lady over at Jodi's house.

BTW do you think her mom is going to watch the kids all night anyway?

Next time WW is over at OM call your MIL and ask for your WW...see what story she tells you! inform her that some folks around town are contacting you that they have seen her at OM place and watching the kids while her daughter commits adultory is wrong!

The goal here is to do your best to make the affair as inconvienent and as uncomfortable as possible....


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

Have you talked to a lawyer? See if you can get a lawyer to send the OM a threatening letter with regards to suing him for allienation of affection.

There may be another term used in your state but the OM can be sued (in some states)

Again making the affair as inconvienent and as uncomfortable to continue!!!!


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## WalterWhite (Sep 14, 2012)

A mans first obligation is his kids, his wife, then his country. The OP has no moral business being in the military when his family needs him the most. Let single guys do the mili thing. You have to set your priorities straight, man...find a way to get out ASAP.

As to the OP's wife? She is gone, gone, gone and never to be trusted.

Love is never enough to make things work.


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

If it wasn't for guys like brokenmarine we would have to deal with those pluckers on our front lawn....were our kids play!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## lostmyreligion (Oct 18, 2013)

WalterWhite said:


> A mans first obligation is his kids, his wife, then his country. *The OP has no moral business being in the military when his family needs him the most. * Let single guys do the mili thing. You have to set your priorities straight, man...find a way to get out ASAP.
> 
> As to the OP's wife? She is gone, gone, gone and never to be trusted.
> 
> Love is never enough to make things work.


Seriously?

You're saying that the breakdown in morality in this situation lies with the OP?!? 

His wife *knew* who she was marrying and what his job (the really dangerous one that supports her and protects the rest of us) entailed. Yet she took her vows anyway.

Her job, the only one I think he expected of her while he did his, was to have his back on the homefront and keep the faith.

She did neither. Instead, she fraternized and is probably still lying on her back with her legs spread for an enemy he didn't even know he had.

Again, the breakdown in morality lies where?!?!?


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## jb02157 (Apr 16, 2014)

Keep going with your plans to divorce but find out all you can about the infidelity, how many times, who with for ammunition in your divorce. 

I have to laugh at most of these posts that mention divorce and "moving on". For men there is no such thing as "moving on" because you are tied to your ex for life financially. Women can "move on", men can't.


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## Ripper (Apr 1, 2014)

You are out working yourself into an early grave. Your wife shows her appreciation for this by banging another guy. Seeing how he is getting all the good parts of the marriage, maybe he should start footing the bills.

Your marriage is done, your wife killed it. You will never trust her and most likely resent her for the rest of your days. 

Your children will adapt. It's not right and its not fair, but that is the world we live in. Be the best father you can, when you can. 

Take care of yourself. You deserve better than this.


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## WalterWhite (Sep 14, 2012)

the guy said:


> If it wasn't for guys like brokenmarine we would have to deal with those pluckers on our front lawn....were our kids play!
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


This is patent bool sheet.

Any man that puts the country before his children is a fool.

And no, his being in the armed forces is not the entire reason his marriage is messed up, but it is a big contributing factor.


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## WalterWhite (Sep 14, 2012)

lostmyreligion said:


> Seriously?
> 
> You're saying that the breakdown in morality in this situation lies with the OP?!?
> 
> ...


His wife's cheating is not excusable, and that's 100% on her.

But his putting the country before his children, his wife is immoral and not to be applauded by the country. There are too many single men and women that can serve.

Why you and others can't see that his children deserve better from him is immoral too. A true American would understand what I'm saying here.


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## WalterWhite (Sep 14, 2012)

jb02157 said:


> Keep going with your plans to divorce but find out all you can about the infidelity, how many times, who with for ammunition in your divorce.
> 
> I have to laugh at most of these posts that mention divorce and "moving on". For men there is no such thing as "moving on" because you are tied to your ex for life financially. Women can "move on", men can't.


This is not always the case. A man can move on after divorce and especially after the youngest kid is out of school.


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## rustytheboyrobot (Nov 20, 2013)

Your marriage is already over you just need to realize it. Another military marriage done. It's over and has been for awhile. Time for you to accept it. You only have control over a few things so work on them. Give the future you some presents today. Trust me future you will thank you for it.

Money and visitation are the two things you've got to focus on. These are the things you need to think about and you are far away from that.

She is gone and has been gone for awhile. You can't believe anything she says. You can't trust her. You know she is lying to you. What gifts are you going to give future you today?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## rustytheboyrobot (Nov 20, 2013)

WalterWhite said:


> This is not always the case. A man can move on after divorce and especially after the youngest kid is out of school.


Oh so you mean in sixteen years I can like move on? Hey I'll already have celebrated my fiftieth birthday so maybe I can wait until my little guys birthday and throw myself a mid life crisis?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## sammy7111 (Apr 19, 2014)

then way stop it sounds like she doesn't care


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## lordmayhem (Feb 7, 2011)

WalterWhite said:


> This is patent bool sheet.
> 
> Any man that puts the country before his children is a fool.
> 
> And no, his being in the armed forces is not the entire reason his marriage is messed up, but it is a big contributing factor.


Wrong. When any man or woman swears the oath of enlistment, he/she swears to serve their country. And that means laying down your life if need be. Service before self is one of the core values. 

In case you didn't know this, but if only single people were in the military, we wouldn't have a military. 

There are other military vets in this forum too who can attest to this. Yes, in my 23 years serving our country, I've missed wedding anniversaries, birthdays, school functions, etc, etc, etc. Its called sacrifice. Its takes a strong marriage to survive the military. Some spouses just cant handle it. 

And this WW would have cheated on him even if he wasn't in the military by her actions. Infidelity affects civilians too, anyone who works long hours are vulnerable. Calling those of us who served fools is patent bullsh!t.


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## phillybeffandswiss (Jan 20, 2013)

WalterWhite said:


> Any man that puts the country before his children is a fool.
> .


I agree, how dare a person serve and be a parent.


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## lostmyreligion (Oct 18, 2013)

WalterWhite said:


> His wife's cheating is not excusable, and that's 100% on her.
> 
> But his putting the country before his children, his wife is immoral and not to be applauded by the country. There are too many single men and women that can serve.
> 
> Why you and others can't see that his children deserve better from him is immoral too. A true American would understand what I'm saying here.



OP took an oath to defend his country before he got married. His and his future family's home.

His WS entered into the relationship fully understanding that this oath superseded the vows of matrimony. *She married him anyway.*

He had two sets of vows in this situation and kept both of them. Loyal to country, loyal to her. He is a man with morals.

Thankfully.

She had only one set of vows to deal with which she went ahead and broke. She cheated and she lied. She is morally bankrupt.

What you are saying suggests that morals are a matter of expedience. That maybe if he had forsaken his vows to defend his country, and focused on his marital vows instead, her infidelity might not have happened. "His wife's cheating is not excusable, and that's 100% on her" sounds like "His wife's cheating is not excusable, and that's 100% on her, but he's partially to blame for it too because he wasn't there."

Sounds very similar to the same kind of "logic" and sophistry you hear from WS's to justify their actions. 

As far there being "too many single men and women that can serve." the fact is not enough of them sign up. Or are you suggesting the US institute mandatory service? Bring back the draft?


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## 6301 (May 11, 2013)

brokenmarine said:


> yeah and shes still covering it up a bit she said last night that she wasnt going to go see him i asked her not to because i know wht kind of state shes in and know that he might try to take advantage of it but after she said she wouldnt she did go see him again according to her gps.


 What you just posted above is your answer. First she lied and second, she went to his house.

So much for her trying to work it out. Look friend, if she said she felt guilty about it and is really remorseful about it she sure has a lousy way of showing it.

Time for you to put your "Smokey the bear hat" on and become a D.I. in your home. 

She's giving you a load of shinola thinking that you love her enough that you'll accept anything she gives or tell you. 

Time for you to prove her theory wrong. She needs to know that her actions deserve consequences and if you don't impose them PDQ, then be ready for more bull $h!t headed your way. 

Let her know that the divorce is going through and she better find a job real quick because your not going to support her bad habit that she suddenly acquired. 

I got a feeling that she also thinks that she can ride this out on your dime and with that kind of thinking, your dime can get stretched to the point that it's see through.

Don't play games with her and don't play nice guy because if you don't realize it, she's not playing nice and has no intentions to do so.


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## Pepper123 (Nov 27, 2012)

I side with those on the side that his career is not to blame, his morally bankrupt wife is. With a dad that served in the Army and a sister that carries a caseload at the VA, I have a better understanding (I think) how important your service is OP. 
Thank you for your service, and for being an upstanding man. Your service is not forgotten or unappreciated by those of us that realize the sacrifices you've made to serve.

I'm sorry for what you are going through.


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## Thorburn (Nov 23, 2011)

WalterWhite said:


> His wife's cheating is not excusable, and that's 100% on her.
> 
> But his putting the country before his children, his wife is immoral and not to be applauded by the country. There are too many single men and women that can serve.
> 
> Why you and others can't see that his children deserve better from him is immoral too. A true American would understand what I'm saying here.


Walt, if I wrote what I really want to say I would be banned. I spent 40 years in the military. National Guard, Reserve and Active Duty. I served in combat. During a "peacetime" mission I was held at gunpoint for several hours and interrogated. I had an interpreter with me that day and he told me that the men pointing their weapons at me had orders to shoot me. Not long before this event I had a guy next to me basically had his head blown off due to a terrorist attack.

A "true American" would understand the sacrifices that our military endues each day.

And calling many folks immoral for not seeing things from your perspective is just plain wrong.

Everyday countless folks put their lives on the line so that you can spew your thoughts freely.

Freedom and liberty come at a cost. Ask the Vietamese that came here, or the Cambodians that survived Pol Pot, or a large multitude of folks living in countries where talking about liberty is a death sentence.

And the OP being a Drill Instructor is a typical assignment for career advancement. It does involve long hours, going in early and staying late. But it is an assignement that lasts about 36 months and they only take top notch Marines.

Depending on the OP's rank and duty location, housing can be an issue.

Serving the military is not immoral but is an honorable tradition.

Less then .5 % of Americans serve in the military. Less then 1/2 a percent!!!!

And there are many kids that are honored and proud that their parents serve.

So, please, stop with calling me and many others immoral.


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## Thorburn (Nov 23, 2011)

WalterWhite said:


> This is patent bool sheet.
> 
> Any man that puts the country before his children is a fool.
> 
> And no, his being in the armed forces is not the entire reason his marriage is messed up, but it is a big contributing factor.


I will respond again to your posts.

So my 40 years in the military was foolish?

It paid for my youngest son's education and he has a great job as a design engineer. He told me I risked my life for him to get an education. He was in school while I was in combat.

The service that my brothers and sisters in arms provide is so that you and the other 99.5% of Americans that don't serve can enjoy your freedoms.

You can spew all you want about me and the OP and others that served or are seving as being immoral and foolish. And how we should put our kids first. And due to our service you have the freedom to spew just about anything you want.

Since I am immoral and foolish it should mean nothing.


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## Chris989 (Jul 3, 2012)

WalterWhite said:


> His wife's cheating is not excusable, and that's 100% on her.
> 
> But his putting the country before his children, his wife is immoral and not to be applauded by the country. There are too many single men and women that can serve.
> 
> Why you and others can't see that his children deserve better from him is immoral too. A true American would understand what I'm saying here.


What about fathers who go skiing, or horse back riding, or mountain climbing? They are high risk, can involve lots of time away from the family and do not benefit their country.

What about the "business man" who spends weeks away from home. Driving hundreds of miles to meetings, flying regularly - all relatively high risk.

What about the police man/woman. Again, a significant risk of serious injury/death. Again, involves time away from the family etc. etc.

I am not saying you are wrong or right, but it isn't on to "call" people who put their lives at risk for your safety.


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## WhiteRaven (Feb 24, 2014)

WalterWhite said:


> His wife's cheating is not excusable, and that's 100% on her.
> 
> But his putting the country before his children, his wife is immoral and not to be applauded by the country. There are too many single men and women that can serve.
> 
> Why you and others can't see that his children deserve better from him is immoral too. A true American would understand what I'm saying here.


My dad was a marine. He put his life on the line so that his kids and his fellow countrymen could have a better future. My mom didn't spread her legs in the marketplace for all and sundry. 

As a true blue American, I say *'YOU SUCK'*.


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## 6301 (May 11, 2013)

WalterWhite said:


> A mans first obligation is his kids, his wife, then his country. The OP has no moral business being in the military when his family needs him the most. Let single guys do the mili thing. You have to set your priorities straight, man...find a way to get out ASAP.
> 
> As to the OP's wife? She is gone, gone, gone and never to be trusted.
> 
> Love is never enough to make things work.


 If that's the case, then there would be no cops because they put their lives on the line every day too right?

Or a firefighter. He/she has to go into a burning building to put it out. What do we do? Just watch the building burn down and along with the people in it?

You should think before you speak because all you did my friend is make a real big ass out of yourself with your statement. 

By the by, I'm also a Vietnam veteran.


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## Thorburn (Nov 23, 2011)

6301 said:


> If that's the case, then there would be no cops because they put their lives on the line every day too right?
> 
> Or a firefighter. He/she has to go into a burning building to put it out. What do we do? Just watch the building burn down and along with the people in it?
> 
> ...


Welcome Home Bro.


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