# I know i have anger problem.



## redheadfirecracker (Apr 29, 2014)

but he will not admit to any of it being his fault as well. I am constantly at home alone with our 3 year old. I understand tht he works 10+ hours a day but I do not understand why he has to come home from work eat dinner and sit outside smoking cigarettes and cruising porn for the rest of the night until it is time for bed. most of my anger stems from feeling like he is selfish and only thinks about himself. I am constantly putting him and my son first when is it my turn for someone to put my feelings before theres. 

I went on vacation and took my 3 year old to see family in hopes to have some time to relax and make my husband relize how much I do for him. instead he was constantly drinking going to strip clubs and cheated on me with his exgirlfriend. He decided while I was gone he wanted a divorce and as soon as I get back he changed his mind about that. but still the drinking, going out, neglecting his child, and talking to other males and female. I have no clue what to do or what to think.

he has to.d me on many occasions that he is tire of the strip club and drinking and has not stopped. this recent time I got his family involved for an intervention. he says he told himself he does not want to go to the strip club anymore and he is done. 

Should I believe this?


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

Why would you?

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## redheadfirecracker (Apr 29, 2014)

I am just so in love with him and this say only been going on sense February. I am hoping it was a phase and he can change?


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## lost soul (May 20, 2009)

sounds like you deal with his behavior. If you love him that much and your willing to except his ways then . . . . . . Your a grown woman and know whats right and wrong for you or at least what you can handle. B U T please put your self first ! ! ! don't be a door mat. If there is something you want or need get it ! don't baby him in the morning when he's hung over. You get up early and go to Denny's. 

If he's gonna be a terd don't get none on you ! ! ! just my thought but hey I'm just a dumbass what do I know


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

redheadfirecracker said:


> I am just so in love with him and this say only been going on sense February. I am hoping it was a phase and he can change?


So what happened in February? 

C


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## *LittleDeer* (Apr 19, 2012)

He sounds like a terrible husband. What changes has he made? 
Is he in counseling? 
How has he showed you through actions that he is committed change? 

Are you in couples counseling?


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## redheadfirecracker (Apr 29, 2014)

lost soul said:


> sounds like you deal with his behavior. If you love him that much and your willing to except his ways then . . . . . . Your a grown woman and know whats right and wrong for you or at least what you can handle. B U T please put your self first ! ! ! don't be a door mat. If there is something you want or need get it ! don't baby him in the morning when he's hung over. You get up early and go to Denny's.
> 
> If he's gonna be a terd don't get none on you ! ! ! just my thought but hey I'm just a dumbass what do I know


actually I think this was awesome advice I am in the state of mind where I am just going to take care of myself and my son and he can deal with his consequence himself. I am just going to live my life and if I happen to find someone better for me then so be it. but he is cut off from all intercourse unless I see a drastic change in him and I can trust him again....


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## redheadfirecracker (Apr 29, 2014)

PBear said:


> So what happened in February?
> 
> C


his best friend commited suicide in january


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## PBear (Nov 16, 2010)

redheadfirecracker said:


> his best friend commited suicide in january


Well, in that case... Perhaps an ultimatum might be an option. Get serious help (rather than self-medicating with alcohol and strippers?), or you're out. You can't fix him, but you can implement boundaries on what behavior you're willing to accept. 

C
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Openminded (Feb 21, 2013)

Don't you have another thread -- he's talking to males as well as females? I doubt that's a phase.


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## lenzi (Apr 10, 2012)

What does any of this have to do with an anger problem?


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## redheadfirecracker (Apr 29, 2014)

lenzi said:


> What does any of this have to do with an anger problem?


the fact that me being bipolar I believe is what is pushing him away from me. and pushing him to other people


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## lost soul (May 20, 2009)

redheadfirecracker said:


> actually I think this was awesome advice I am in the state of mind where I am just going to take care of myself and my son and he can deal with his consequence himself. I am just going to live my life and if I happen to find someone better for me then so be it. but he is cut off from all intercourse unless I see a drastic change in him and I can trust him again....


Good for you and when ever possible put a lil stash away $10,$20 whatever after a few months you'll have an egg then 2 and so on. Oh it's hard to find people you can trust when talking about your problems but right here no one knows any one. You could blap all your issues and even if no one replies , , , it allows us to get it off our chest. Let it all out then come back and read it :scratchhead: try and look at it from different point of views.

PS ton't take to heart what some may say, , , we're all dumbasses some of us just don't know it 

Good luck


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

redheadfirecracker said:


> actually I think this was awesome advice I am in the state of mind where I am just going to take care of myself and my son and he can deal with his consequence himself. I am just going to live my life and if I happen to find someone better for me then so be it. but he is cut off from all intercourse unless I see a drastic change in him and I can trust him again....


So he was not like this until his friend died? He might be very depressed right now.

There is a book that I think would help you a lot at this stage:

"Divorce busting"


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