# Would you like to play this type of roleplay in a relationship to keep things...



## spyece (Jan 21, 2012)

if you are in love for a long time, maybe married and if your boyfriend asks for you for some soft-core sexual favor in exchange for gifts to keep things spicy, bigger the gift bigger the favor would it be OK to do so? How much would you like it on 1-10 1:Not-at-all and 10:Extremely? Please mention if you are a girl or boy.

this is not compulsory stuff like some do in real time, i am talking of doing this as an act, she will be getting her gifts anyways i.e. stuffs she wants in daily life and they both will be making out too like always, but to do it differently play it as favors exchange. considering there is enough sex in relationship already and this is not the boyfriends idea to get more sex or nor its is the girlfriends idea to leech his money, just to keep things spicy, do you think its a good idea to do so?

consider this as a different type of role play,

Male and Female, I would appreciate both of your opinions on this.

Thanks.


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## shy_guy (Jan 25, 2012)

There is nothing wrong with this type of play IMO. This can be a lot of fun. Actually, this is pretty tame.

We absolutely do not allow anyone else in our relationship. But we fantasize about some WILD stuff and role play it together. It took me getting comfortable with the idea that people fantasize about things they do not want in the real world, doing a little introspection and realizing this in myself, then opening my mind up to hear what my wife really fantasizes about. Once she was comfortable that she could open up to me, then the role playing and fantasy world became one of the most exciting sources of ideas for spice in our love life.

She had fantasies about being rented out to a rich man for the evening. We role played that by me using my hotel rewards points to get the hotel room, then setting things up for her ... now the fantasy needs to be played right. I mean, she is NOT a cheap lady, so this guy had to REALLY come up big for her. Expensive merchandise may be a part of a fantasy like this, but it had better be good to role play in our world. (of course, I'm the guy ... and I have absolutely NO PROBLEM being passionate in ravishing her the way she fantasized about being ravished)

Yes, it can be a lot of fun, but both partners have to be comfortable with the role play, and understand their partner. The fantasy and role needs to be understood, then you can let go, and have the time of your life in the fantasy, then pick up and respect each other and treat each like the prince/princess you like to treat them like the next day. Giving their fantasy becomes a part of taking care of them the way you like to take care of them. 

There's a lot that can be written in this area, and to tell you the truth, sometimes I don't understand where these things come from, nor how we can be so comfortable in giving the other something that pushes our boundaries like it does ... but it is all within a very secure, and comfortable relationship, so it just works for us ... once we got comfortable with idea of fantasies sometimes being something we don't want in the real world, but have a lot of fun with in fantasyland.

I don't think anything you've said is really strange. You have to be comfortable and secure with each other to make it work, but if you are, then yes, it can add a lot of spice.


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

This is a slippery slope. No matter what he thinks before hand, paying for it will eat at his ego and self esteem. Maybe once as a joke, but if it becomes a regular thing I would not like it.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

I don't bargain for things with sex. Sex is my reward just as much as it's his reward. A reward for being awesome 

I'm not a hooker.


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## shy_guy (Jan 25, 2012)

I just want to make sure something is clear when reading responses here. If my wife thought like That_Girl, we absolutely would NOT do the things I described in my reply. It is an individual thing, and of course, there are two individuals in a marriage. Both have to be considered.

I don't think there is anything wrong with the opinion or position that that_girl expressed. I don't think she's prudish for thinking that, and I don't think she's missing out on anything. It's just that we're all put together different. In our marriage, it's a lot of fun. In her marriage, it doesn't sound like it would work out well. Both are valid positions IMO. You have to find whether or not it will work in your partnership, and your partner is the one you have to work that out with.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

So your wife only has sex with you when you give her things?

Wow.


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## shy_guy (Jan 25, 2012)

that_girl said:


> So your wife only has sex with you when you give her things?
> 
> Wow.


If you're talking to me, then no, not even close to correct.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

shy_guy said:


> If you're talking to me, then no, not even close to correct.


Oh that's good. that's what I thought the OP was talking about...


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## shy_guy (Jan 25, 2012)

that_girl said:


> Oh that's good. that's what I thought the OP was talking about...


Hmm. okay. I didn't read it that way. If that was the only way we had sex, then that definitely wouldn't work for us. I see a difference in spice and main course.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

:rofl: I'm not a prude :rofl:

We 'role play' but more bondage and stuff. I don't need "expensive merchandise" to have good, amazing sex.

:rofl: prude....lol me? That's awesome.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

> if your boyfriend asks for you for some soft-core sexual favor in exchange for gifts to keep things spicy, bigger the gift bigger the favor would it be OK to do so?


Isn't that what he's saying, Shy_Guy? Sex favors in exchange for things?

yep. And I'm not a hooker.


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

Actually giving things for sex from your wife: not hot.

Role playing hooker/john by picking up your wife on the street corner and doing her in the car: very hot.


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## WorkingOnMe (Mar 17, 2012)

Bonus points if she brings the money back to you and calls you daddy.


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## that_girl (Jul 6, 2011)

WorkingOnMe said:


> Bonus points if she brings the money back to you and calls you daddy.


:rofl:

Hubs and I have a joke that someday he'll go hang out at the Home Depot "workers station" and chill with the guys there for a couple hours.

Then I'll pull up and need someone to help me with some work. But I'll talk to a couple before going up to him and then we'll start making out and I'll take him home :rofl:

Let the guys' jaws drop :rofl::rofl::rofl:


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## Enchantment (May 11, 2011)

I think as long as you and your SO are both up for it and it's just roleplaying, then all's good.

If only one of you is up for the role play, then you'll have to work something else out that you both feel comfortable with.

And if this is a regularity - like your sex life devolves into you wanting her to do things and she does them just to get a 'gift' - then I think you need to really evaluate your sexual relationship together, as that scenario does not seem conducive to long-term sexual intimacy and harmoney together.


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## shy_guy (Jan 25, 2012)

that_girl said:


> Isn't that what he's saying, Shy_Guy? Sex favors in exchange for things?
> 
> yep. And I'm not a hooker.


I know you don't like to read long posts, but I think we really just had a different perception of the original post. I think you can see in my first post in this thread what my answer is for that. It can be part of role-play. That would fit into the role-play I put in that post.

I completed the thread title and repaced "..." with "spicy." You read it to mean something that was required. I'd actually agree with your position if that was how I interpreted it. The entertaining moment for you in my post came because I was still thinking role playing fantasies and you were reading it the way you said, and I was just trying to clarify my view that it's not for everybody, but I was still thinking both of us were thinking of this as role playing a fantasy, and one I know wouldn't be comfortable for everybody.

Does that make sense? And do you agree when thinking of how we were each reading the original post?


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## shy_guy (Jan 25, 2012)

Enchantment said:


> I think as long as you and your SO are both up for it and it's just roleplaying, then all's good.
> 
> If only one of you is up for the role play, then you'll have to work something else out that you both feel comfortable with.
> 
> And if this is a regularity - like your sex life devolves into you wanting her to do things and she does them just to get a 'gift' - then I think you need to really evaluate your sexual relationship together, as that scenario does not seem conducive to long-term sexual intimacy and harmoney together.


:iagree:

This is what I was trying to say, but Enchantment said it much more concisely.


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