# Trust your gut.



## Rugs (Apr 12, 2013)

This probably doesn't warrant a new thread but it's so important and I'm wondering if anyone here or that you know of, had a gut feeling their partner was cheating and was wrong? 

The more stories I read here, the gut is the best detector there is.


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## EleGirl (Dec 3, 2011)

I have read that men are wrong like 75% of the time when they have the gut feeling that their wife is cheating. And women are right like 85% of the time.

I'm not sure about that...


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## thatbpguy (Dec 24, 2012)

I was convinced my wife was having a PA, but it was a fairly minor EA (if there is such a thing). That said, still a few unanswered things. .... and there I go again...

So yes, it does happen. 

Being betrayed builds paranoia.


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## jld (Dec 1, 2013)

thatbpguy said:


> Being betrayed builds paranoia.


:iagree:


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## larry.gray (Feb 21, 2011)

None of the dudes I know personally were wrong about their gut. 5 for 5 that they were right when they suspected.


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## nickgtg (Jan 11, 2013)

My guy instinct is usually correct. It could be my line of work, but I'm damn good at figuring out the truth with very little to go on.


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## Acoa (Sep 21, 2012)

My gut was right about the problem. I was way off on specifics, but right about there being a problem and about the general nature of the problem.


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## TimeHeals (Sep 26, 2011)

EleGirl said:


> I have read that men are wrong like 75% of the time when they have the gut feeling that their wife is cheating. And women are right like 85% of the time.
> 
> I'm not sure about that...



LOL. 99.87125% of all statistical averages not published in peer-reviewed scientific literature are made up


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## Pluto2 (Aug 17, 2011)

My gut was right
and I tried to convince myself it was indigestion.


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## staystrong (Sep 15, 2012)

Had a gut feeling something was wrong in the relationship, not that she was cheating. Got the usual excuses (new work stress, depression, etc.). 20/20 it all makes sense. She even said once that she was afraid I might cheat on her during an MLC and I shouldn't tell her because it would hurt her. Typical cheater projection.


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## Pluto2 (Aug 17, 2011)

staystrong said:


> Had a gut feeling something was wrong in the relationship, not that she was cheating. Got the usual excuses (new work stress, depression, etc.). 20/20 it all makes sense. She even said once that she was afraid I might cheat on her during an MLC and I shouldn't tell her because it would hurt her. Typical cheater projection.


You know, mine also accused me of cheating once. We were having a fight and he hurled that out there. I was totally shocked and said after all these years he really didn't know me. He tried to take it back but when I pressed to ask why in the world he would ever think that-all he would say was "I don't know" Well, now I know. Turns out that a lot of things he told other people were problems in our relationship were all part of his sick, twisted mind.


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## workindad (May 7, 2011)

My gut knew something wasn't right. It took a while to figure out exactly what was going on.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## commonsenseisn't (Aug 13, 2014)

EleGirl said:


> I have read that men are wrong like 75% of the time when they have the gut feeling that their wife is cheating. And women are right like 85% of the time.
> 
> I'm not sure about that...


My gut tells me these stats are a bit off. My gut has never lied to me and the older I get the more I try to stay in tune with what my gut tells me.


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## Marduk (Jul 16, 2010)

You need to be able to separate instincts from emotion (such as fear), but once you can, yes, trust your gut.


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## drifting on (Nov 22, 2013)

My gut screamed WW was having an affair, I hoped I was wrong. Nope, I was correct. I'd have given anything to be wrong though.


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## ReidWright (May 15, 2014)

The worst ones I've read about here are the ones with no gut feelings at all. The spouse sees an open chat or email on the computer, or gets a tip-off call out of the blue.

That's really scary when it's possible for a spouse to be so good at hiding it that there isn't even the slightest gut feeling.


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## loyallad (Aug 1, 2014)

Pluto2 said:


> You know, mine also accused me of cheating once. We were having a fight and he hurled that out there. I was totally shocked and said after all these years he really didn't know me. He tried to take it back but when I pressed to ask why in the world he would ever think that-all he would say was "I don't know" Well, now I know. Turns out that a lot of things he told other people were problems in our relationship were all part of his sick, twisted mind.


A lot of WS accuse BS of having affairs. My WW has accused me several times of this. Don't know why this is, perhaps to throw BS off or hoping BS is having an A to balance out their A, I just don't know.

A lot of the stuff you can research says trust your gut. Either consciously or subconsciously you have picked up on something that is out of place, not the norm. The problem is some BS are/were like me and thought no way my spouse is cheating. Once I had the real truth I looked back and recalled all those red flags that screamed something is going on. It would be funny if it wasn't so painful some of the things WS do are so much alike. It's almost like there is a manual for cheaters on things to do and say. How many on here have heard, oh he/she is just a "friend". Or been told OP is someone they "seldom" see. "Nothing happened, I swear". And then there is the classic "I love you but I'm not in love with you".


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## 2asdf2 (Jun 5, 2012)

TimeHeals said:


> LOL. 99.87125% of all statistical averages not published in peer-reviewed scientific literature are made up


Unless they were arrived at through the POOYA extraction method.


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## Marduk (Jul 16, 2010)

loyallad said:


> A lot of WS accuse BS of having affairs. My WW has accused me several times of this. Don't know why this is, perhaps to throw BS off or hoping BS is having an A to balance out their A, I just don't know.


Once they see how easy and fun it is, they assume everyone's doing it.

For friends, that's cool, because it validates their opinion (which is why they seek friends that are cheating).

But it also leads to the "if I am, why isn't he/she?"


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## missthelove2013 (Sep 23, 2013)

Never had a single clue...or hint...or gut feeling...NOTHING
My ex was a serial cheater for 4 years...multiple co-workers and a couple bosses...I HAD NO CLUE

She never used personal email, cell phones, home phone...ALL communication was done via work media...and my wife aint the smartest chick in the world LOL...the ONLY reason I found out was the om's wife caught him and passed the proof on to me...

It really is not that hard to cheat and hide it...I often think cheaters want to get caught because they do dumb ****...


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## the guy (Aug 3, 2010)

When my old lady 1st cheated it was my gut feeling...no proof whats so ever.
We swept it under the rug, she was straight for a few years, but I had so much resentment it was easy for me to be indifferent towards my old lady. This indifference lasted for 13 years.I just stopped giving a phuck about her or what she did.

Through out the years it was my gut that told me what she was doing, I didn't need to find any proof I kind of knew (kept my head in the sand) she was screwing around and as long as I got what I wanted from my old lady, after that she could phuck off.

Those were some dark days!


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## Lon (Jun 6, 2011)

Yep,my gut is the most reliable resource I often have at my disposal. It rarely speaks to me, but when it does I listen because it has always been 100% correct. It never suggested my wife was cheating, until it did, and the gut turned out yet again to be right.


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## barbados (Aug 30, 2012)

missthelove2013 said:


> Never had a single clue...or hint...or gut feeling...NOTHING
> My ex was a serial cheater for 4 years...multiple co-workers and a couple bosses...I HAD NO CLUE
> 
> She never used personal email, cell phones, home phone...ALL communication was done via work media...and my wife aint the smartest chick in the world LOL...the ONLY reason I found out was the om's wife caught him and passed the proof on to me...
> ...



I'm curious MTL, was your marriage good otherwise during this time ? Were you guys getting along and was your sex life normal ?


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