# Need some advice - no contact broken by WS



## rumple9 (Jan 13, 2012)

So back here again after a long time.

My story is last xmas eve (2011) a year ago found out my long term girlfriend of 21 years was cheating. We have a 13 year old daughter. House is up for sale but won't sell because of the recession and neither of us can afford to move out.

We haven't spoken to each other in well over 6 months and we are both going about our lives completely separately, although I still love her dearly and wish I could turn back the clock.

I've followed the no contact rules and in October I met a new lady who I have been spending most of my time with although I still love W/S.

Anyway xmas day comes today and W/S says to me out of the blue as I was unwrapping presents with our daughter "I want us to be friends" she then came and sat on my knee and put her arms around me. I broke down in tears, it felt so good to have her near me after so long. 

I said "do you realise what you've done to me and our family?" She said "I know - I'm sorry" and she kissed me on the cheek. She then took our daughter to her brothers for the night.

My head has been screwed all day since. I know she's still seeing OM although not that often.

I really don't know what to make of this - any advice ?


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## GetTough (Jul 18, 2010)

rumple9 said:


> So back here again after a long time.
> 
> My story is last xmas eve (2011) a year ago found out my long term girlfriend of 21 years was cheating. We have a 13 year old daughter. House is up for sale but won't sell because of the recession and neither of us can afford to move out.
> 
> ...


Well first decide if you want to try again. Loving her and wanting her back are two different things. Either way basically just play it cool. Try not to get angry, even if you feel it. Express anger if you need to, just don't get angry. Try to avoid blame. Remain centered and find out what she really wants. Perhaps friends is all she wants, I'd bet 70% likely she's thinking more though.


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## lee101981 (Sep 6, 2012)

I would just chill out and see where it goes. Try to clear your head and see what it is you really want. Give it time to see if she really wants it or is it just the holidays..


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## rumple9 (Jan 13, 2012)

I'm past being angry towards her. just want my old life back which is impossible, as I could never trust her again


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## Hermes (Oct 8, 2012)

Where is your focus? 

Other than telling you she wants to be friends, sitting on your knee and giving you a kiss on the cheek, what have her actions stated?

She is still with the OM? 

First you need to be honest with your current g/f. It is not fair for her to be plan b.


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