# Advice about moving on -



## Lostwouthim (Jun 17, 2012)

Currently, I would say that I'm separated and will not be finalizing my divorce until next year. I've known for a few years that this relationship would probably end this way, I never took the initiative to throw in the towel myself and waited for STBXH to make the decision. We've been together a total of 19 years, married 13 years,separated 5 years ago and moved back in together less than a year later, without doing the work needed to make the marriage work, trust and resentment have been our shortcomings with each other, he is the 3rd love of my life. 

But it seems that every time I've gotten out of a relationship that I always gravitate back to the 1st love of my life, we originally broke up while we were in high school in 95, I found him again in 98, 2012 and most currently 2017, has anyone else gone through something like this and rekindled with their 1st love? Up until 2012, I had known that I was the only love of his life, and I have already made plans to see him when I arrive back home in the next couple of weeks.

Talking to my friends, mother they tell me I need to be single for awhile, but talking to my therapist he says some people are just built in the way of moving from one person to the next, I know the reasons why my marriage has failed and we still plan on being friends, we have just grown into 2 different people who are on different paths in life. 

Has anyone else had an experience where they went and met up with their high school sweetheart, and found that, that was what they were wanting their whole life and it worked out? 

Or do I really need to concentrate on meeting new people and seeing what happens with that? I already feel like I know who I am and what I'm wanting out of life.

Sorry if this should be on a different board.


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## arbitrator (Feb 13, 2012)

*Meet new people!

And if you thereafter find that you are continually holding a torch for each other, then act on it!

But be good and sure first!*


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## 3Xnocharm (Jun 22, 2012)

I reunited with my first love, we got married way too fast, and he dumped me less than a year later to remarry his first wife. So yeah, not a big advocate.


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## Lostwouthim (Jun 17, 2012)

Thank you, I have been looking forward to meeting new people, and I'm actually excited about being free, being able to be myself and treat this like a new adventure. The possibilities are endless.


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## Lostinthought61 (Nov 5, 2013)

Lost, while to truly hope you do find someone if not the one to spend your life with, I do think you need some down time, to work on yourself so you will be ready to move on emotionally not just physically.


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