# New Here - married 20 years and counting



## FarNorthAngel (6 mo ago)

Hi all,

Been married to my husband for 20 years. Lots of ups and downs; kids, finances, infidelity but still going strong even though I’m not sure how We have continually defied the odds.

Some issues are reading their ugly head currently: my busy job, sexual frequency/interests, last kid just graduated high school, keeping busy as pseudo-empty nesters.

I’m glad to be here and look forward to combing the boards!


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## jlg07 (Feb 24, 2017)

Welcome to TAM! Post away when you can!


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## BeyondRepair007 (Nov 4, 2021)

FarNorthAngel said:


> Hi all,
> 
> Been married to my husband for 20 years. Lots of ups and downs; kids, finances, infidelity but still going strong even though I’m not sure how We have continually defied the odds.
> 
> ...


Welcome to TAM! It sounds like you have a lot of different experiences to share with hurting and confused people. And some new challenges ahead with that empty-nester thing.

What's your job? Why is it so busy now?


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## FarNorthAngel (6 mo ago)

BeyondRepair007 said:


> Welcome to TAM! It sounds like you have a lot of different experiences to share with hurting and confused people. And some new challenges ahead with that empty-nester thing.
> 
> What's your job? Why is it so busy now?


I’m in a Fraud/Risk position and it’s super busy. Very production/case/deadline based. I work from home and it frequently bleeds into home life which I am trying to find a balance. I’m also the higher earner which has bruised his ego a bit. We don’t discuss it, but I know it bugs him. I’m trying, it feels great to be able to give back after all his years of hard work


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## frenchpaddy (May 31, 2021)

Welcome to TAM 
I am happy for you that you have a good job now in this time , jobs are going to be hard to keep if this down turn is going to dig in more ,

There was cheating is the past if it was in the past and you lived through it leave it in the past


FarNorthAngel said:


> sexual frequency/interests


 it is normal at times to take on more work than is good for you and you relationship , but don't loose sight of your relationship , is it just tired and not time for sex or just not up for sex at the same time , 

if you know there is a problem you need to fix it make time or you could be now reacting to past hurt


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