# Good chemistry?



## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

What makes you feel like you have good chemistry with someone?


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## ThreeStrikes (Aug 11, 2012)

Not wanting to stab their eyes out is a start...


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## lisab0105 (Oct 26, 2011)

If I want to kiss them.


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## EnjoliWoman (Jul 2, 2012)

Yup. If I'm drawn to them. It can be their smile, their caring demeanor like the way they guide me through a doorway... but in the end it has to make me want to kiss them like Lisa said.


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## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

I want to touch and be touched by them even when not having sex

I can be in comfortable silence (that is the rarest thing of all)


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## Ceegee (Sep 9, 2012)

Jellybeans said:


> What makes you feel like you have good chemistry with someone?


Things just click. 

Similar interests and values. 

Easy to sit and talk with or go out with. 

Kiss the same. 

Bodies go together. 

Similar sane:crazy ratio.


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## Ceegee (Sep 9, 2012)

Dollystanford said:


> I can be in comfortable silence (that is the rarest thing of all)


Good one.


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## COguy (Dec 1, 2011)

I get a boner.

I would say that if I look forward to seeing them again that's a good sign. If I start thinking about what they look like naked it's a good sign of attraction.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Ceegee said:


> Similar sane:crazy ratio.


:rofl:


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

COguy said:


> I get a boner.


:rofl:


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Do you think chemistry is something that you fee pretty early on or it takes awhile to develop? 

How often do you think you have "good chemistry" with someone - romantically?


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## COguy (Dec 1, 2011)

Jellybeans said:


> Do you think chemistry is something that you fee pretty early on or it takes awhile to develop?
> 
> How often do you think you have "good chemistry" with someone - romantically?


I think you know right away if you are physically attracted to someone.

Sometimes if someone is REALLY funny or cool they can go from being unattractive to somewhat attractive, but for the most part if you think someone is attractive, there was probably a base attraction from the start. That's my opinion anyway.

And I think it's different for guys and girls. A man could not date a successful, famous, rich woman who was ugly without selling out. Women, on the other hand, actually find guys like Hugh Heffner and Gene Simmons attractive, because they find power attractive without having to separate it from physical appearance.


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## Dollystanford (Mar 14, 2012)

It's instant for me. If I don't feel it when I first meet you it's unlikely to grow


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## working_together (Oct 16, 2011)

I'm not sure if it's instant, but after a few dates if I start feeling butterflies when I'm about to see them.

The kissing is probably on the top of my list, if I can't get enough of their lips and the way they taste, yep, it's chemistry.


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## ThreeStrikes (Aug 11, 2012)

Dollystanford said:


> It's instant for me. If I don't feel it when I first meet you it's unlikely to grow


Bwahahahaaaaa!


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## 3Xnocharm (Jun 22, 2012)

lisab0105 said:


> If I want to kiss them.


Me too! Usually chemistry for me is instant, and I tend to be very forward when I feel it. It makes me want to touch and kiss that person. If its not instant, then usually its pretty damn close, as I converse and connect with them.

My last husband wasnt really instant chemistry, because of his weight, but as we connected over a few dates, I realized that I REALLY liked him and came to a conscious decision that the weight was not important.


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## Mavash. (Jan 26, 2012)

Add me to the early on category. If I don't feel it in 2-3 dates it ain't happening.


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## Pbartender (Dec 6, 2012)

Dollystanford said:


> If I don't feel it when I first meet you it's unlikely to grow












Good night, everybody!


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## badcompany (Aug 4, 2010)

Teetering on the very edge of dropping into the gutter....

To begin with, physical attraction. Simply put from my unfiltered mind, would I hit it and would I want to wake up looking at her every morning? If yes...proceed. 
Do I see that she is attracted to me?
Things in common(extracted and honest, not manipulative)?
Someone I can be myself around?
Good communication?


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## Self Help (Oct 22, 2013)

I have felt it before on the first date. Hard to explain other than you just know.


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## samyeagar (May 14, 2012)

My STBW and I met online and got to know each other over the course of a month and a half through email, text, and voice calls. Spent a few hundred hours on the phone talking. Once we met in person, holy sh1t, we both knew it instantly. I wanted to rip her clothes off and hit it right then, and come to find out later, she wanted me to. We ended that first date with a rather long, hot kissing session with a bit of groping, and I have never felt anything like it. We slept together on the second date, and haven't stopped since. We still talk and text just as much as we ever have, and the intimacy keeps growing deeper, but yeah. The chemistry was instant...set the whole world on fire.


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## Hardtohandle (Jan 10, 2013)

Jellybeans said:


> What makes you feel like you have good chemistry with someone?


That they are not looking to cheat on me.


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## Married but Happy (Aug 13, 2013)

I think chemistry and compatibility are two different things, but some people seem to equate them. Chemistry is sexual attraction. Compatibility is values, goals, etc. - and included sexual compatibility (style, frequency, etc. - chemistry plays into it). You can have chemistry and no compatibility, and vice versa.

I've had chemistry and great sex with women not suited to a lasting relationship, for example. It's about _mutual _strong physical attraction and the desire to act on it.


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## Holland (Aug 20, 2012)

Mr H and I have great chemistry and compatibility, it just keeps growing and getting deeper as time goes on. So vastly different from my ex and I.

The chemistry is strong, we enjoy a lot of long, passionate kissing and it feels electric. 
His smile just keeps me going all day, I live for that smile.

Suffice to say our sex life rocks and we are both thriving within the relationship. I would never go back to my old life with a lack lustre relationship like ex and I had, never, ever.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

badcompany said:


> Teetering on the very edge of dropping into the gutter....
> 
> To begin with, physical attraction. Simply put from my unfiltered mind, would I hit it and would I want to wake up looking at her every morning?* If yes...proceed. *


:smthumbup: Love this.



samyeagar said:


> The chemistry was instant...set the whole world on fire.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Married but Happy said:


> I think chemistry and compatibility are two different things, but some people seem to equate them.


Too true. But this thread is about the initial chemistry. LOL. 

Your points are excellent though. The compatibility is what makes it last, I think. And the mutual commitment to the relationship.


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## badcompany (Aug 4, 2010)

Jellybeans said:


> :smthumbup: Love this.


LOL, so many other guys won't say this or admit it, but I'll throw it all out there

Hey, btw 3X has ante'd up with pics and you have not JB.....


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## 3Xnocharm (Jun 22, 2012)

samyeagar said:


> My STBW and I met online and got to know each other over the course of a month and a half through email, text, and voice calls. Spent a few hundred hours on the phone talking. Once we met in person, holy sh1t, we both knew it instantly. I wanted to rip her clothes off and hit it right then, and come to find out later, she wanted me to. We ended that first date with a rather long, hot kissing session with a bit of groping, and I have never felt anything like it. We slept together on the second date, and haven't stopped since. We still talk and text just as much as we ever have, and the intimacy keeps growing deeper, but yeah. The chemistry was instant...set the whole world on fire.


THIS is what I want!!


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## badcompany (Aug 4, 2010)

3Xnocharm said:


> THIS is what I want!!


Don't we all


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## bravenewworld (Mar 24, 2013)

For me good chemistry is when the neurotic "thinking" part of my brain dims because the primal "physical" part of my brain totally drowns it out. 

Most recently it happened when I was drinking hot toddy's with the guy I'm dating in his study. We were looking at a ship in a bottle he built and he was telling me about being lost at sea on his sailboat - it was a pretty intense story and suddenly we were all over each other. It's funny how sometimes passion just hits you like a crack of lightening. To me, that's good chemistry!


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## Hardtohandle (Jan 10, 2013)

bravenewworld said:


> For me good chemistry is when the neurotic "thinking" part of my brain dims because the primal "physical" part of my brain totally drowns it out.
> 
> Most recently it happened when I was drinking hot toddy's with the guy I'm dating in his study. We were looking at a ship in a bottle he built and he was telling me about being lost at sea on his sailboat - it was a pretty intense story and suddenly we were all over each other. It's funny how sometimes passion just hits you like a crack of lightening. To me, that's good chemistry!


Man, I need to buy me a ship in a bottle.


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## Oldrandwisr (Jun 22, 2013)

The first indication for me is being able to converse effortlessly without putting any thought to what you're going to say next. Everything just flows. A good sign is when you are apart, longing for that person and having that "can't wait" feeling until the next chance to spend time together.


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## bravenewworld (Mar 24, 2013)

Hardtohandle said:


> Man, I need to buy me a ship in a bottle.


If you find a cool walking stick you could prop it next to your bedroom door and talk about the time you used it to fight off that bear.


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

badcompany said:


> LOL, so many other guys won't say this or admit it, but I'll throw it all out there
> 
> Hey, btw 3X has ante'd up with pics and you have not JB.....


I want to see 3x! 

Yeah I guess I am incognito!



Oldrandwisr said:


> The first indication for me is being able to converse effortlessly without putting any thought to what you're going to say next. Everything just flows. *A good sign is when you are apart, longing for that person and having that "can't wait" feeling until the next chance to spend time together.*


That is the best. 



Satya said:


> I believe that it's possible for chemistry to build, not always to be instant like a spark.


Agreed. Sometimes it can be a slow build. And sometimes it's instant, like an, "I know you from somewhere" feeling of connectivity. It's bizarre but so fun.


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## 3Xnocharm (Jun 22, 2012)

Jellybeans said:


> I want to see 3x!


In my profile JB!


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## Jellybeans (Mar 8, 2011)

Pretty! I love your hair!


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## 3Xnocharm (Jun 22, 2012)

Thanks!


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