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Belly Full, Empty Balls Rule

21K views 165 replies 47 participants last post by  BigbadBootyDaddy 
#1 ·
@BigbadBootyDaddy posted on another thread that 90 % of men only need their partners to keep their belly's full and their balls to be empty to be content in the relationship. The 10% outliers are insignificant.

What say you men of TAM? Are you within the 90% who only care about sec and food, or the 10% who need "more" to be happy in a relationship?
 
#3 ·
Not even close. I need emotional connection, mental stimulation, fun, activities together. I need to be cuddled often, hugged and flirted with as well.

I'm the cook and having a full belly is good for both our moods.

Sex is good for both of us as well.

If all I ever had was food and sex,.....?

This might sound bad but I can't even see getting married or even dating someone just for those two things.
 
#7 ·
It just not enough for me either, l still have to like her and want to be desired by her. But she would still expect the same in return. But as time changes for me because of my emotions, if she's not interested much then as all things considered comes to the fact that she just not that into me. And given some time l will make a decision for my part of the relationship.

The full belly and empty balls, just is meaningless if their is no love and attraction. The relationship is dead, and would rather live by myself than be tormented by the thought of a desire to be desired. That is meaningless to my wife and not return in the same manner.

I also need my wife to be individual, in the ways she will let herself be. To add value to my life and appreciate the compromise's l have gave for the family, but l must also value her for all the compromise's she gave.
 
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#31 ·
Thank you for this.

My husband conforms to this mindset too.

I've asked him several times (in several different ways) what gives him his greatest sense of pride/achievement... what the best aspects of his life are - "Coming back from work to hear you laughing with the kids." Always. Unanimously.

His answer has never been "having a beautiful wife who's happy to have sex with me, and who cooks a tasty variety of food."
 
#11 ·
I'm hungry, and looking forward to an evening's encounter tonight.

There will be holidays and planning discussions I'm sure, and etc, but to round out the evening I'll be full, and we'll both be content in multiple ways.

I'll just roll with that tonight. 😎😎👍👍👍❤❤
 
#12 ·
Well, it's a good starting point, but like Conan, I want and need a lot more. However, if these are missing (esp. the sex, as I AM capable of feeding myself!), then "everything else" won't be sufficient.
 
#13 ·
How is it a good starting point?

I want a partner, not an indentured servant who's job it is to cook and service me. It's literally no different than "if momma ain't happy, aint nobody happy."

Keeping myself fed and happy is my job, not my wife's. It's my job to meet my own needs, not hers.

I usually want to help her be happy, and she usually wants to help me be happy. But those things are on me as an adult, not on her. And if I'm not doing my own work in the relationship, I sure as hell can't come home demanding sex and a hot meal.
 
#14 ·
While the thought in the post was simplistic... it is kind of true...

I am not that simplistic, I do want more.

Mostly, I want to feel loved, I want to be loved.

Now, since I need sex to feel loved, it includes sex. But that is only one part.

The thing that is also, true, is that some Men are pathetic about sex and the women they are with is the only one and all that crap.

Women that are with me should understand... I am a better cook that almost everyone of you.

And if I don't feel loved, and I am not getting laid, I will find a way to have the need for love and sex fulfilled. If it goes on long enough, the first step will be to lose whoever I am with.
 
#18 ·
I agree. To me, those two are pretty much the foundation of any healthy relationship. Everything else in the relationship is up to you to build and as we all know a building can't stand without a good foundation
 
#22 ·
@BigbadBootyDaddy posted on another thread that 90 % of men only need their partners to keep their belly's full and their balls to be empty to be content in the relationship. The 10% outliers are insignificant.

What say you men of TAM? Are you within the 90% who only care about sec and food, or the 10% who need "more" to be happy in a relationship?
I am not a man, however women would do well to avoid any man who believes the above bolded statement. Men who have this philosophy are highly likely to be lazy/selfish in relationships, expecting their women to carry full responsibility for the state of the relationship. They are not partner-material, more like the very definition of a man-child.
 
#23 ·
While I may not agree with the original point completely, your suppositions here are just as simplistic as the original point.

That does not help anything or anyone understand.

And like I said, while the original sentiment may be simplistic and I myself need more in a relationship... If sex is not happening then the relationship is not happening... That part is simple...
 
#27 ·
In my teens and early twenties I could not wrap my head around not being in the mood for sex. There were times in the last year of my marriage where it got to the end of the day and my thought process was along the lines of "I've not gotten any help or positive feedback from my SO for a month and you know what? I'd rather read a book or get caught up on sleep." and I understood. A willing and enthusiastic sexual partner can excuse a multitude of sins but not everything.

I've done celibacy in a relationship and having negative interactions was worse than the lack of sex. If I had a partner that was emotionally invested but physically incapable, I think I would be OK with it as long as they were OK with me handling it myself.
 
#29 ·
10%

However, that is an old saying that was never meant to be completely true. It was meant as a smart ass remark to someone who was clueless. Sadly, too many of those resurface without context and folks think they are like gospel.
 
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#36 ·
The statement is just comparing men to dog and how all they care about is food and sex. Not really some life philosophy. Same with happy wife, happy life. That is nothing more than telling men to just shut up and do what ever their wife tells them to do. Hardly flattering for either men or women. Both are recipes for terribly dysfunctional and likely miserable relationships.

Granted, food, sex, and a happy partner are crucial to a happy marriage, and may actually be the most important things to most people, they are hardly the only things, and without those other things, the relationship is likely to be a miserable failure for both people.
 
#42 · (Edited)
@BigbadBootyDaddy posted on another thread that 90 % of men only need their partners to keep their belly's full and their balls to be empty to be content in the relationship. The 10% outliers are insignificant.

What say you men of TAM? Are you within the 90% who only care about sec and food, or the 10% who need "more" to be happy in a relationship?
I am not a man, however women would do well to avoid any man who believes the above bolded statement. Men who have this philosophy are highly likely to be lazy/selfish in relationships, expecting their women to carry full responsibility for the state of the relationship. They are not partner-material, more like the very definition of a man-child.
Oh, please. Some people prefer old fashion gender roles. If a man goes out and kills dinner, its only fair the other person prepares it. If roles are reversed then maybe that no longer makes sense.

When my woman takes care of me with a homecooked meal and takes care of me in the bedroom (even if she isn't much in the mood) then I appreciate and want to return the favor in ways she appreciates. If she doesn't, I likely will resent her and lose interest in doing much of anything for her. We can all take care of those needs ourselves but thats not why I married. I have things I do in marriage for her/us and things she does for me/us too and yes I expect sex to have a fulfilling marriage.
 
#59 ·
Oh, please. Some people prefer old fashion gender roles. If a man goes out and kills dinner, its only fair the other person prepares it. If roles are reversed then maybe that no longer makes sense.

When my woman takes care of me with a homecooked meal and takes care of me in the bedroom (even if she isn't much in the mood) then I appreciate and want to return the favor in ways she appreciates. If she doesn't, I likely will resent her and lose interest in doing much of anything for her. We can all take care of those needs ourselves but thats not why I married. I have things I do in marriage for her/us and things she does for me/us too and yes I expect sex to have a fulfilling marriage.
The bolded part is left out of the original quote in the OP and, is not implied in any fashion. Do do you expect your partner to read your mind? Say what you mean and don't chastise when you fail to do so.
 
#45 ·
Have we all lost our sense of humor?

Are we so much like putty that anyone can cause us to have a fit over anything?

Do we believe others are so ignorant and weak that they will be unable to realize statements like that are intended as humor and not the law?

This thread scares me. It's frightening to realize how fragile our culture is.
 
#50 ·
I would urge you to check your own fragility.

I’m not crying in a corner by being offended. I’m pointing out the flaws in the thinking that I find offensive.

I’ve been called many things. Fragile is not one of them.

You can of course, test this at your convenience.
 
#53 ·
I am going to go with a yes answer. Without these there is little point in all the effort that goes into the bunch of other "meaningful" stuff. And no - I'm not going to do a bunch of that to "earn" these 2 basic ones. I'm pretty simple - I really just desire one of them - I can feed myself. Meet that one want/need and I'll make a lot of effort for you.

I know it's unpopular but sex is my only "need" and desire from a woman. Emotional support and all that is nice but it is not a need for me. I am fine and like myself - I don't need verification I'm Ok/nice/special/have my back/whatever. That doesn't mean I'll put up with a bunch of **** just for the sex. Yes I'm old and tainted. ;)
 
#55 ·
I am going to go with a yes answer. Without these there is little point in all the effort that goes into the bunch of other "meaningful" stuff. And no - I'm not going to do a bunch of that to "earn" these 2 basic ones. I'm pretty simple - I really just desire one of them - I can feed myself. Meet that one want/need and I'll make a lot of effort for you.

I know it's unpopular but sex is my only "need" and desire from a woman. Emotional support and all that is nice but it is not a need for me. I am fine and like myself - I don't need verification I'm Ok/nice/special/have my back/whatever. That doesn't mean I'll put up with a bunch of **** just for the sex. Yes I'm old and tainted. <a href="http://talkaboutmarriage.com/images/smilies/wink.gif" border="0" alt="" title="Wink" >:)</a>
Put it like this. Really, I don't need either from women. Porn is plentiful or on the other side of the spectrum, abstinence is rewarding in other aspects. I've been single, then a divorced dad and I managed fine. So on a needs basis, I have no need for women.

But it is nice to have a warm body at night and someone who cares enough to make my wants important to them. If it wasn't for those ingredients, it simply wouldn't be worth the effort.
 
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