Yes, but according to the state, which issues your marriage license, you aren't cheating. Go and try to sue for divorce due to infidelity. Most states don't recognize it.
First, that statement is incorrect. The majority of states in the U.S. still allow a spouse to file for divorce on grounds of adultery. Less than 20 states have strictly no-fault laws.
Second, you're moving the goal posts here on the definition of cheating. This is the first reference that I've seen in this thread to a legal, as opposed to a moral, definition of cheating.
And while we're on the subject of the law and cheating, most state laws agree with my point that a third party has no responsibility for spouses maintaining their marriage vows (or not). Only a handful of states have alienation of affection or tortious interference with marriage laws on the books.
However, they have made women the gatekeepers. Okay, not a bad thing. Women have always been the gatekeepers. You don't just grab a woman and ****. She has to consent. You have to be attractive to her and as some said, she must be attractive to you. You aren't going to go after a woman who is not attractive, so that's a moot point. Women are starting to go after men, but that's not as common as men needing to make the first move.
So, women are the gatekeepers and always have been. Nothing has changed, except for with some women. Read the links to understand. Read the threads here on attraction. I'm not posting links to those. You guys have read at least one. I've read several and participated in some.
Who is "they" who have made women gatekeepers?
Part of me simply disagrees with the logic being used to promote your hypothesis because I haven't viewed women as the gatekeepers since high school. I view sex as the outcome of a social dance between two individuals based on mutual attraction. Either person can choose whether or not to engage in the dance. Either person can make a misstep that kills the other's attraction. I understand that men are more frequently the pursuers and are probably more frequently rejected by women than women are rejected by men, but that still doesn't change the mutual agency involved or absolve a man of responsibility for making the decision to have sex.
And in the context of marriage specifically, any suggestion that the woman (or LD spouse) is a "gatekeeper" just seems like a really unhealthy way of looking at it, even if there is a basis for making that argument, because that's a very transactional view of marriage. What I mean is this. I generally want sex more than my wife does, so on one hand you could argue that she's the gatekeeper of sex because I'm more often the one initiating/pursuing. On the other hand, I know that she won't refuse sex (without good reason) if I pursue it, so it's not like she's withholding or limiting the amount of sex I have. I don't view her as the gatekeeper of sex any more than she views me as the gatekeeper of sex (even when I turn her down), compliments or any other way I show her love.
That may seem like semantics, but I strongly believe that how we view the marriage shapes our reality. Whether it's sex or anything else, viewing it from a positive and unselfish perspective rather than a controlling or quid pro quo viewpoint is critical to marital satisfaction.