Hey all, thanks for your thoughts on this — they’re all appreciated! Navigating the dating world after a divorce is a different game altogether, and I’m still trying to find my footing.
As to pinning him down for weekly plans on his off weeks, in his defence, I don’t really give him a chance to be the first to do this. I like him and am excited to see him, so I make sure we can spend some time together. I need to give him a chance to also do this though.
We got together last night and we talked. He’s explained to me before that when there are a lot of stressful things going on, picking up the phone or writing a text isn’t something he thinks about. I get that, and I know his situation because he’s very open about it. His situation last week was beyond nuts, and once he explained things to me last night, I understood 100%. That doesn’t help MY mindset when we’re not in contact, but it’s something that we need to work through, and I really need to calm the heck down. Yes, I’m important too, but I know how it feels when your tank is empty, you really have nothing to give anyone, and are just running on fumes and trying to stay afloat.
When we talk either on the phone or in-person, communication is present, it’s open and very transparent on both parts. He speaks with kindness not only to me, but to those around him, and he has made plans for future events. @Affaircare
, you mentioned that not everyone is a talker/texter/writer, and you’re right. He’s a really quiet man, an introvert like me, a planner/organizer and he likes routine like me. He was never a texter from the get-go, and I actually appreciated not having to have a cell phone in my hand all the bloody time because it’s annoying to always be “on”. He’s sweet and protective of me, and while I forget when we’re apart, when we’re together, he obviously cares as his actions really speak to that. Funny that you mention love languages; we had a conversation about that a couple weeks ago.
, nope, I would never cancel plans with family or friends for any man. Whoever I make plans with first is who I spend time with.
So, I’m going to work on myself, calming down and realizing that not everything is directly associated to how me may/may not feel about me. We’re both pretty new to this dating thing, and have some things to figure out as we go along. I will be stepping back with always initiating weekly get togethers and give him a chance to initiate. To me, being in a relationship means that you’re there for good times and bad, and you’re there to support one another through the latter.