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post #16 of 51 (permalink) Old 11-03-2019, 07:36 AM
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Re: Need opinions on bringing up the past

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Originally Posted by Sweeny View Post
Eventually my female friend told my girlfriend that my ex wife said once that I gawked at attractive women.
I read this and was quite convinced the people involved were teenagers. I'm not saying that to make a point, I really thought it when I read the post. Then I thought "Wait...they've both been married and divorced, so they can't be teenagers. What the actual F?

Sexually mature males and females will occasionally "gawk" at attractive members of whatever gender they prefer. This is normal and standard. The fact that the "dirt" your incredibly immature GF dug up on you was that you're a normal male who may have "gawked" at a hot woman is just absolutely insane.


Follow the evidence where it leads and question everything.
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post #17 of 51 (permalink) Old 11-03-2019, 08:34 AM
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Re: Need opinions on bringing up the past

After you split, figure out what is going on inside you and work on that some. Doesn't seem like a great deal from your post, but something is up. You still care or you wouldn't have gotten as angry as you did when she brought it up. Try to avoid serious relationships until that's gone or under control.

"I'm significant!! Screamed the dust speck." - Bill Watterson
"Youth is wasted on the young". - George Bernard Shaw

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post #18 of 51 (permalink) Old 11-03-2019, 08:57 AM
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Why are you with a woman who intentionally "digs up dirt" and starts arguments over it? That is immature/bad behavior, why are you putting up with it?

There is nothing you can do to change her behavior. You need to set boundaries for what you will tolerate and if she won't respect them then let her go.
This
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post #19 of 51 (permalink) Old 11-03-2019, 09:22 AM
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Re: Need opinions on bringing up the past

This GF of yours has her 'dam' doubts about you, she needs those thoughts reinforced so she can get out of the way when she opens the spill gate, flushing you away.

She is poisoning your relationship purposely. 7
Why?

Her subconscious mind wants out. Pluto cannot be denied.

Her being toxic, can only bring out her, those naturally (for her) toxic actions and words. 7

You suffer secret enemies, those folks thought friendly, those disquieted beings that snip at your heels, covertly. 12, 11
You also suffer enemies that are openly hostile. 11, 12, 7

Fate has it to attack you in the open, through friends and acquaintances. 11, 7

You need to know that this is your lot in life.

Choose your friends wisely, your love mates even more carefully.

Fate has it to attack you from the rear, from that dark place 12.
And openly, from two fronts, these affronts.

You can be had, have been had.
Now, you know.



King Brian-

This....This is the nub of the stick that pokes me in the eye when the light of day energizes my optic nerve....SunCMars.... The Allegory of the Cave--> On this, I did a '180' and stepped out. The Lion in Winter. Invictus..By Will, Shall.
The Host, Rd is ill, any years left, remain now, in doubt? Red Dog is now lost to us.
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post #20 of 51 (permalink) Old 11-03-2019, 09:24 AM
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Need opinions on bringing up the past

I think your mad at the wrong person here. You should be upset with your gf not your friend.
Also you need to learn how to communicate a hell of a lot better than just calling someone and cussing them out. Have a mature and calm conversation with her about how you donít want her to talk about your previous relationships with your current one. And leave it at that.

As far as your gf goes... you need to cut that behavior ASAP. Everyone has issues and I understand that. But she is trying to find things not to like about you, reasons not to trust you, then she can hold it against you and punish you for life with it. She needs to get a hold of her issues if she ever wants a healthy relationship.

Last edited by Girl_power; 11-03-2019 at 10:15 AM.
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post #21 of 51 (permalink) Old 11-03-2019, 10:55 AM Thread Starter
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I know I didn't handle it great and called when the argument in the truck was going on. I was more disappointed in my friend then angry. Yeah I was mad at my girlfriend. Prodigal hit the nail on the head plus I fell in love with her and and was hoping things would change. You are all right. I don't give up easily and its just hard to let go sometimes.
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post #22 of 51 (permalink) Old 11-03-2019, 11:10 AM
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Originally Posted by Sweeny View Post
I know I didn't handle it great and called when the argument in the truck was going on. I was more disappointed in my friend then angry. Yeah I was mad at my girlfriend. Prodigal hit the nail on the head plus I fell in love with her and and was hoping things would change. You are all right. I don't give up easily and its just hard to let go sometimes.
Is your girlfriend "young"? Just curious, because it sounds like she is.
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post #23 of 51 (permalink) Old 11-03-2019, 11:37 AM Thread Starter
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post #24 of 51 (permalink) Old 11-03-2019, 11:43 AM
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Re: Need opinions on bringing up the past

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36
Unfortunately, if she is still acting 13 at this age, odds are she is stuck in that behavior pattern.

People can change but she obviously hasn't grown emotionally past tweeny crap.
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post #25 of 51 (permalink) Old 11-03-2019, 11:44 AM
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Re: Need opinions on bringing up the past

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Has there been infidelity in the relationship? Was their infidelity in either or your pasts?

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post #26 of 51 (permalink) Old 11-03-2019, 12:39 PM Thread Starter
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None in either of ours that we know of

Last edited by Sweeny; 11-03-2019 at 02:29 PM.
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post #27 of 51 (permalink) Old 11-03-2019, 12:46 PM Thread Starter
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post #28 of 51 (permalink) Old 11-03-2019, 02:39 PM
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What is it that you actually want considering the fact that you know your setting yourself up for disaster? She have big tits or something??
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post #29 of 51 (permalink) Old 11-03-2019, 02:52 PM
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Re: Need opinions on bringing up the past

I would dump the both of them......
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post #30 of 51 (permalink) Old 11-03-2019, 04:59 PM
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Re: Need opinions on bringing up the past

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Originally Posted by Sweeny View Post
36
She's a full grown woman with a marriage and divorce under her belt and she considers hearing that her BF, at some point in the past, "gawked" at an attractive woman something to be upset about? Are you kidding me? At her age she should be well aware that men and women look at other men and women they find visually appealing and that, so long as there is no improper behavior, this is completely normal and harmless. The fact that she "threw in your face" and said she "knew it" makes me question her sanity, maturity, and/or understanding of reality and the natural world.

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Has there been infidelity in the relationship? Was their infidelity in either or your pasts?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweeny View Post
None in either of ours that we know of
Would it matter if there was infidelity in either past? Nothing about this is normal behavior for a mature human being even if said human being had been cheated on. This woman is all upset and spewing drama because her BF's friend said that her BF's ex-wife once said years ago that he "gawks" at attractive women. Gawks. Not approaches or tries in any way to interact with.

Follow the evidence where it leads and question everything.
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