Is it inappropriate to look up ex’s on FB? - Page 4 - Talk About Marriage
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post #46 of 56 (permalink) Old 11-12-2019, 06:33 PM
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Re: Is it inappropriate to look up ex’s on FB?

RM,

How has the frequency and intensity of sex varied in the marriage, if she claims not to be interested in sex, yet looks up old flames I would say that's the final nail.

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post #47 of 56 (permalink) Old 11-12-2019, 07:23 PM Thread Starter
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RM,

How has the frequency and intensity of sex varied in the marriage, if she claims not to be interested in sex, yet looks up old flames I would say that's the final nail.
Tamat, i’d say the sex, or lack there of, is indeed the final nail. Maybe 1-2x a week of very uninteresting sex. She must be the first 44 year old post menopausal woman I’ve ever met.
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post #48 of 56 (permalink) Old 11-13-2019, 11:51 AM
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Re: Is it inappropriate to look up ex’s on FB?

1-2 times is a week is not sexless, so why is that the final nail?

Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you.


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post #49 of 56 (permalink) Old 11-13-2019, 12:38 PM
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Re: Is it inappropriate to look up ex’s on FB?

Maybe it's closer to 1 time a week of charity, pacifying or pity sex, combined with other bad mojo, could tip it towards the negative.

I'm just surmising.
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post #50 of 56 (permalink) Old 11-13-2019, 01:34 PM Thread Starter
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1-2 times is a week is not sexless, so why is that the final nail?
No, it’s not sexless, but it isn’t good either. Combine that with a meddling MIL (which my wife never stands up to), no relationship with my 19 year old daughter (from my previous m), she’s not allowed to “step foot in OUR house”, poor communication skills (I get the silent treatment for days, sometimes weeks), refusal to find her own IC (I’ve been seeing my IC for a year), prior A, I’ve just checked out.
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post #51 of 56 (permalink) Old 11-13-2019, 01:48 PM
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Re: Is it inappropriate to look up ex’s on FB?

@RebuildingMe, is there a big age gap between you and your wife? I don't think you've ever mentioned ages but based on her behavior, she sounds like a social media junky which is more of a <40 crowd.
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post #52 of 56 (permalink) Old 11-13-2019, 03:01 PM Thread Starter
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@RebuildingMe, is there a big age gap between you and your wife? I don't think you've ever mentioned ages but based on her behavior, she sounds like a social media junky which is more of a <40 crowd.
I’m 48 she is 44. This is my second M. I have 3 adult kids. This is her first M, no kids prior. We have 8 year old twins together.
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post #53 of 56 (permalink) Old 11-13-2019, 08:04 PM
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Re: Is it inappropriate to look up exs on FB?

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Tamat, id say the sex, or lack there of, is indeed the final nail. Maybe 1-2x a week of very uninteresting sex. She must be the first 44 year old post menopausal woman Ive ever met.
One to two times a week is not bad? If its not interesting thats something you both can work on ?
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post #54 of 56 (permalink) Old 11-13-2019, 08:23 PM
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I'm curious, does she really claim to be past menopause at 44?! Does she truly not get a period anymore (not stopped from sort of birth control)?

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RM,

How has the frequency and intensity of sex varied in the marriage, if she claims not to be interested in sex, yet looks up old flames I would say that's the final nail.
Tamat, i’d say the sex, or lack there of, is indeed the final nail. Maybe 1-2x a week of very uninteresting sex. She must be the first 44 year old post menopausal woman I’ve ever met.
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post #55 of 56 (permalink) Old 11-14-2019, 03:30 PM Thread Starter
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I'm curious, does she really claim to be past menopause at 44?! Does she truly not get a period anymore (not stopped from sort of birth control)?

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RM,

How has the frequency and intensity of sex varied in the marriage, if she claims not to be interested in sex, yet looks up old flames I would say that's the final nail.
Tamat, i’d say the sex, or lack there of, is indeed the final nail. Maybe 1-2x a week of very uninteresting sex. She must be the first 44 year old post menopausal woman I’ve ever met.
She went to her woman doctor a few months back and told me something to that effect. Maybe “pre” menopausal? Either way, she’s got a lot of work in front of her. I’m two weeks in with IHS. I just can’t take the excuses anymore. From the A, to FB, to sex, to her mother, she has an excuse for everything. Sorry if I’m venting.

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post #56 of 56 (permalink) Old 11-14-2019, 04:10 PM
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Re: Is it inappropriate to look up ex’s on FB?

In general, it's not a good idea.

Though there might be circumstances when it is appropriate. But not done in secret.


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