Re: Coping with a partner's body alterations/piercings/tattoos
This is a discussion that I had to chime in on.
It brought back memories of the first date that I had with my wife. Unbeknownst to me at the time, her then closest friend was a goth wannabee who was heavily tatted up. As we sat at dinner, we had the following discussion:
HER: "What would you say if I got a tattoo?"
ME: "I'd say that it has been nice knowing you."
HER: "You don't mean that."
ME: "Try me."
She was enough into me that she decided not to try me. Once we started dating, she separated herself from that group. With that separation came an increase in maturity, and any future discussion of tats was in reference to other people and how ridiculous they look. We are in total agreement tats/piercings are aesthetically repellent, and that if either of us came home with one, that there would be some serious, potentially marital ending discord.
For me the issue of tats/piercings comes down to an issue of self image, self discipline, and maturity.
The majority of the people that I know or have been acquainted with who have them have a low self image and use these as tools to divert attention. They seem to think that defiling/defacing their bodies either permanently or temporarily provides cover for their perceived deficiencies, like the morbidly obese person with liberal ink that hopes people focus on the "Art," instead of the fact that they are 5'4" and weigh four hondo.
Then there are others like my BIL, who thought that it was "Cool" to have rewind, forward and stop symbols (like on a VCR) inked on his arm. He has to be the center of attention, and can be obnoxious and grating. At times, it has taken all self control to stop me from asking him that if I pressed his stop button, would he shut the hell up?