V-day! - Page 2 - Talk About Marriage
General Relationship Discussion Although anyone can post anywhere on Talk About Marriage, this section is for people interested in general relationship and marriage advice.

User Tag List

 136Likes
Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
post #16 of 67 (permalink) Old 02-10-2020, 01:59 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2020
Posts: 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by bobert View Post
Absolutely nothing. I have never acknowledged Valentine's Day and I don't intend to start now. I would like my wife to not mention it, not sulk about it and get over the incredibly stupid day.
So are you saying that you have always knowingly refused to acknowledge a day that you knew your wife regarded as soecial?

How did you expect that to go over year after year?

justlistening is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #17 of 67 (permalink) Old 02-10-2020, 02:09 PM
Member
 
bobert's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 860
Re: V-day!

Quote:
Originally Posted by justlistening View Post
So are you saying that you have always knowingly refused to acknowledge a day that you knew your wife regarded as special?

How did you expect that to go over year after year?
Yes, because it's a stupid day. Don't worry though, she found someone else to celebrate with and **** one Valentine's Day long ago. That started a 4 year long affair, so I guess she got a few more Valentine's Days out of it. Or I could celebrate a stupid holiday and the start of her affair all at once. That'd be fun!
bobert is offline  
post #18 of 67 (permalink) Old 02-10-2020, 02:20 PM
Member
 
The Outlaw's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2019
Location: The Southern States
Posts: 238
Re: V-day!

I'm going on a date. With myself.

My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.
The Outlaw is offline  
 
post #19 of 67 (permalink) Old 02-10-2020, 02:23 PM
Member
 
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 6,665
Re: V-day!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Faithful Wife View Post
Hey Sam...are you ok? Was this just a joke? If not this is surely not you so thought I would check.

I literally may be dropping dollars on strippers because Iím so freaking bored and currently dateless that maybe seeing some honeys will cheer me up! Lolz
Hey FW. Yeah, things have been going alright. This is not exactly a joke, as it has been a long while sice my wife and I went to a strip club, and she's been suggesting we go for a while now, and hey, what the hell

"Let's never stop having sex. We're so good at it, we OWE it to sex to never stop having it."
-My wife
samyeagar is online now  
post #20 of 67 (permalink) Old 02-10-2020, 03:13 PM
Forum Supporter
 
sunsetmist's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2018
Location: The Land of Y'all
Posts: 1,897
Re: V-day!

IMO: Valentine's Day causes performance anxiety in both male and female folks. Be sincere and honest. Be considerate. Say/write what is truth to you. Men want to be appreciated. Women want to be loved--at the minimum.

To me something involving good memories is more valuable than gold. This is not the time for a command performance, but just a genuine extra demonstration of affection.

Often folks expect what happened in a family of origin situation. My folks adored each other all their lives. This was an actual legacy of what might have been.

My ex made it clear that he thought our marriage was a mistake early on--any Valentine's Day expression from him was so that he could be admired by others. I've seen this addressed above here--sounds and is painful.

I know who loves me and who does not. I know who appreciates me and who does not. It is nice to get extra attention whether or not you 'know' it. A homemade coupon for a massage, for time off the usual grind, there are inexpensive ways to create a special feeling.

Calling V-Day a stupid day--It was often painful for me, I have no SO and expect nothing. But to me, this day is more about transmitting feelings than actions.
sunsetmist is offline  
post #21 of 67 (permalink) Old 02-10-2020, 03:20 PM
Member
 
Marduk's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 17,874
Re: V-day!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Young at Heart View Post
Well, I have tried that in the past and got them thrown in my face. Some women has such body self image issues that anything implying sex simple is too threatening for them.

Yes, flowers. Yes, a movie. No to restaurants as they are way too crowded. Home with a bottle of wine and an Amazon firestick movie is not the plan.

For me V-day is a day of low expectations, that way I am not disapointed.
Ouch. I'm sorry.
Marduk is online now  
post #22 of 67 (permalink) Old 02-10-2020, 03:22 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Currently; the planet earth.
Posts: 202
Re: V-day!

It looks like a lot of people avoid going out to eat on valentines because the restaurants are packed. I don't think I have ever noticed this.

Of course it might help that I rarely take my wife out on valentines day. I just use it as an excuse to take her out. The actual day we go out will depend on what day we decide we can both enjoy it. As far as I am concerned any day we go out during the month of February is our celebration of valentines day. (Usually we keep it within a week of the actual date. This gives us at least two weekend to work with.)

This year we will be going out on Saturday. Our oldest child has a church activity that we are taking him and some other youth to. We will drop them off, then go shopping for tile and other things we need for our bathroom remodel. Have an early dinner. Pick up the youth. Make the 2.5 hour drive home. Then who knows what.

Last edited by leftfield; 02-10-2020 at 03:35 PM.
leftfield is offline  
post #23 of 67 (permalink) Old 02-10-2020, 03:29 PM
Member
 
notmyjamie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2019
Location: United States
Posts: 1,688
Re: V-day!

I really don't want to fight the crowds going out to dinner...especially on a Friday night this year. We love cooking together so our original plan was to make a nice prime rib meal together. But his girl wants dinner out to celebrate her birthday so out we go!! But we'll be going to a good fire grilled pizza place that doesn't take reservations and can't be considered romantic at all so I doubt they'll be a lot of coupls there fighting for tables. She's the sweetest thing and really wants me there and how can I say no to that? Of course, I just found out she wants her Mom there too...should make for a funny story..."what did you guys do for your first Valentine's together?" "We went out with his wife." LOL Thankfully she and I get along just fine and we're going early enough that we'll have our own time alone later in the evening.

I might wear something special that I give him a peek at just before we leave the house just to torture him though.
notmyjamie is online now  
post #24 of 67 (permalink) Old 02-10-2020, 03:34 PM
Member
 
Ursula's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2016
Posts: 1,657
Re: V-day!

This is the first Valentineís day that Iíll have acknowledged for a number of years, to be honest, and Iím more than a little excited! Iíve never been out for dinner, but that is what beau has planned for us. Last week, I put in an order for a small vase of underwater orchids to be sent to his office on Friday. As for what Iíd like him to do for meÖ Iíd just like his time. After dinner, weíll go kick back for the evening, and the following day, Iím taking him cross-country skiing for the first time. And, we just hit 11 months (boy, does time sure fly!)
Ursula is online now  
post #25 of 67 (permalink) Old 02-10-2020, 03:38 PM
Member
 
Mr. Nail's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Western US
Posts: 4,316
Re: V-day!

After Saturday, probably better do something. She is working friday and saturday, so Wednesday is the night this year. I'll just declare it steak and all the oral sex she can handle day. I won't get any consideration. But, it's ok I'm well aware VD is for girls.

Mr. Nail is online now  
post #26 of 67 (permalink) Old 02-10-2020, 03:55 PM Thread Starter
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2018
Posts: 1,330
V-day!

Quote:
Originally Posted by zookeeper View Post
Valentine's Day? Yuk...



A consumerist day to shame and pressure men into spending money on crap no one needs and for women to flex their gifts on any other woman they come across.



I'll let the ladies in on a little secret. Most men put little real thought into what they buy you. They work off a price point and hope it is just a little more than your friends/sister receives. The same goes for jewelry.



Iíll tell the men a little secret... we like the thought and effort. A lot.

Last edited by Girl_power; 02-10-2020 at 08:21 PM.
Girl_power is online now  
post #27 of 67 (permalink) Old 02-10-2020, 04:40 PM
Member
 
Ursula's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2016
Posts: 1,657
Re: V-day!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marduk View Post
Wow, why the hate on for V-Day?

I mean, it's basically a freebie to buy your wife some lingerie and have a fun night. Costs you some flowers and a card or something. Maybe a small gift. Why is that so bad?
I get it; itís a Hallmark holiday that greatly benefits retailers. Iím sending some flowers to my man that day because I think itís a nice gesture, and heís never received flowers. I didnít go over the top though, and when I was online looking at flowers, I was astounded at the cost of roses which seems to be the most popular for V-day. Iím not a big fan, and would prefer something like daisies or something similar. I also agree with those who state that itís the other 364 days that count more. Really, if you canít show your SO your love and devotion during the rest of the year, itís pretty pointless on Feb 14th.

But, I get your point to @Marduk. Personally, Iíve never been a huge fan of V-day and havenít acknowledged it for years. But am looking forward to it this year because Iím with a pretty awesome man.
Ursula is online now  
post #28 of 67 (permalink) Old 02-10-2020, 04:44 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2020
Posts: 69
My husband and I are buying each other a dishwasher. Oh wait, we had to do that anyway lol

I'll probably make his favorite dinner, and he'll bring home my favorite ice cream.
justlistening is offline  
post #29 of 67 (permalink) Old 02-10-2020, 05:26 PM
Moderator
 
MattMatt's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: England
Posts: 27,922
Re: V-day!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Girl_power View Post
What are you doing for your significant other for valentines day?
What WOULD you like your significant other to do for you?
Does anyone decorate and actually get into Valentineís Day?
Buying a nice present and a card.


To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
(Be afraid UK cheaters! CheaterVille has come to the UK!
MattMatt is online now  
post #30 of 67 (permalink) Old 02-10-2020, 06:29 PM
Member
 
Max.HeadRoom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: New York State USA
Posts: 273
Re: V-day!

wine tasting in the ny finger lakes; spend the night too.
Max.HeadRoom is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on Talk About Marriage, you must first register. Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

Important! Your username will be visible to the public next to anything you post and could show up in search engines like Google. If you are concerned about anonymity, PLEASE choose a username that will not be recognizable to anyone you know.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in










Thread Tools Search this Thread
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search



Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome