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post #1 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-21-2019, 09:00 PM Thread Starter
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Religion and relationships

Between a rock and hard place! I've been married for 30+ years. Having issues always made us closer. And we both know GOD has been there. But he refuses to work on our marriage. He refuses to sleep in the same bed. He refuses sex. And with 2 years past now, many times I've asked GOD to help. Told GOD how lonely I am. I won't cheat. I refuse. I can't leave bc I am not financially able.
My question is...how is my faith helping us?
I trust GOD unconditionally. But, if my husband refuses to change...where does that leave me?

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post #2 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-22-2019, 08:04 AM
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Re: Religion and relationships

I'm wondering because of your suffering, and your issues. You blame God? Not on the attack to you but rather a view l hold! Because l believe:

In my time if suffering why would l think I am better the the Lord? Why would l think I should not suffer, it was my God who walked this earth and then because of his love. Gave himself as the price to allow me a path to be with him and the Father. But because of sin.

l have to understand the challenge is not that l will not be challenged or endure trials, but allows me to fully give myself to him. But when l live for myself in the current moment because l think of myself only and should not suffer, l fail and then l think my pain is punishment. But it is not.

I may want my blessings to be with me on this earth, but it is not. It is his promise, because of his forgiveness will allow me an eternity free of pain and suffering to be with him and the Father. To be completely filled with joy and love. And to understand my fulfilllment of good times and pleasure is not on this earth but l heaven.

It is how, l am able to endure my earthly life of pain, fear, and suffering, and the unknown of what tomorrow may bring. And l only ask for the strength that allows me to walk through my pain, knowing my blessings will not be of this world but in the next.

If your not the object of your lovers heart, then your just an object.
If you think the grass is greener on the otherside it's not, what you see are the weeds.

Last edited by Tilted 1; 11-22-2019 at 08:09 AM. Reason: Spelling
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post #3 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-22-2019, 09:50 AM
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Re: Religion and relationships

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Originally Posted by Vigi View Post
Between a rock and hard place! I've been married for 30+ years. Having issues always made us closer. And we both know GOD has been there. But he refuses to work on our marriage. He refuses to sleep in the same bed. He refuses sex. And with 2 years past now, many times I've asked GOD to help. Told GOD how lonely I am. I won't cheat. I refuse. I can't leave bc I am not financially able.
My question is...how is my faith helping us?
I trust GOD unconditionally. But, if my husband refuses to change...where does that leave me?
I'm going to be too busy to give this the attention it needs this weekend but I am interested.

I'm ordained and have done marriage counseling for years.

Hang in there.
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post #4 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-22-2019, 09:54 AM
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I'm ordained and have done marriage counseling for years.

Hang in there.
Well all be dang..... check that out.

I’m impressed!
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post #5 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-22-2019, 09:55 AM
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Re: Religion and relationships

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Honestly.....whatís all that junk supposed to mean ???????

Iíll break it on down in to some English ...... your screwed if your waiting on someone else to save your a$$.
Mr.Married 6:6:69
Thats cool you have a different belief, but honestly your screwed, because if you can't save yourself. By your opinion, it isn't going to happen.

If your not the object of your lovers heart, then your just an object.
If you think the grass is greener on the otherside it's not, what you see are the weeds.
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post #6 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-22-2019, 09:59 AM
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Well all be dang..... check that out.

Iím impressed!
I've got a weird background.
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post #7 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-22-2019, 10:01 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr.Married View Post
Honestly.....what’s all that junk supposed to mean ???????

I’ll break it on down in to some English ...... your screwed if your waiting on someone else to save your a$$.
Mr.Married 6:6:69
Thats cool you have a different belief, but honestly your screwed, because if you can't save yourself. By your opinion, it isn't going to happen.
Yep....unfortunately in some ways, that is pretty much how I see it.


I hope this poor lady finds the help she needs
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post #8 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-22-2019, 10:08 AM
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Re: Religion and relationships

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Yep....unfortunately in some ways, that is pretty much how I see it.


I hope this poor lady finds the help she needs
Well that's sad, because if that's pretty much how you see it.

Why are you posting here?

What assistance do you or can you offer other than despair and hopelessness. Because you believe everyone can do it themselves. You just solved everyone's problem here.

If your not the object of your lovers heart, then your just an object.
If you think the grass is greener on the otherside it's not, what you see are the weeds.
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post #9 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-22-2019, 10:32 AM
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Because I get the feeling she will hang around waiting on holy intervention instead of making the ball roll on her own.
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post #10 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-22-2019, 10:42 AM
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Re: Religion and relationships

No why are you here? Why do you give your advice then? If no one but themselves can do it why do you post do you think your helping them? Why do you care if it's faith that bridges their healing to get them through their pain?


If your not the object of your lovers heart, then your just an object.
If you think the grass is greener on the otherside it's not, what you see are the weeds.
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post #11 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-28-2019, 05:48 PM
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Re: Religion and relationships

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Because I get the feeling she will hang around waiting on holy intervention instead of making the ball roll on her own.
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post #12 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-28-2019, 05:51 PM
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Re: Religion and relationships

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Between a rock and hard place! I've been married for 30+ years. Having issues always made us closer. And we both know GOD has been there. But he refuses to work on our marriage. He refuses to sleep in the same bed. He refuses sex. And with 2 years past now, many times I've asked GOD to help. Told GOD how lonely I am. I won't cheat. I refuse. I can't leave bc I am not financially able.
My question is...how is my faith helping us?
I trust GOD unconditionally. But, if my husband refuses to change...where does that leave me?
So, God hasn't answered you.

Well, maybe he has. It's possible God directed you to TAM so that you could learn from the collective wisdom of your new friends at TAM.

God sometimes leads you to somewhere. Maybe this is one such moment for you?


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post #13 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-28-2019, 06:37 PM
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Re: Religion and relationships

It's tough to tell when we are being helped and how.

I've always thought that relying on God as an ear and not for miracles was more helpful. He is more mysterious than we can fathom. We don't know how He might be helping. All we can do is the best we can with what we have and keep going.

That doesn't mean to give up, at all. It means to do all you can within your abilities. It also means to never give up on yourself.

"I'm significant!! Screamed the dust speck." - Bill Watterson
"Youth is wasted on the young". - George Bernard Shaw

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post #14 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-29-2019, 01:48 PM Thread Starter
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Thank you everyone. It's nice to have a place to vent. I don't expect much except a voice. My place is where I put myself but everything around us intensified so that intensity bleeds into your marriage and you begin to see what it's really made of. Truth is truth.
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post #15 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-29-2019, 02:05 PM Thread Starter
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My faith is everything to me. It's my life. Pruning me means GOD loves me. Bc of stress I have no keep reminding myself to place it in His Mighty Hands. Flesh vs Spirit. No matter what happens between my husband and myself nothing comes between me and GOD and hubby knows!
I came on this site bc I know there has to be others who are suffering and battling the loneliness, etc.
I appreciate it.
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