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post #1 of 16 (permalink) Old 12-02-2019, 10:47 PM Thread Starter
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So, I'm thinking a new, delicious cookie...

"PIG NEWTONS!"

Shortbread cookies wrapped around bacon pieces and fatback jelly.

Any investors?


When I am weaker than you, I ask you for freedom because that is according to your principles; when I am stronger than you, I take away your freedom because that is according to my principles. - Frank Herbert as Muad'dib
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post #2 of 16 (permalink) Old 12-02-2019, 11:01 PM
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Re: So, I'm thinking a new, delicious cookie...

I'm in......based on the name alone.
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post #3 of 16 (permalink) Old 12-02-2019, 11:36 PM
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Re: So, I'm thinking a new, delicious cookie...

I'm for the bacon being wrapped around the fatback-filled cookie. Crispier?
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post #4 of 16 (permalink) Old 12-02-2019, 11:42 PM Thread Starter
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Re: So, I'm thinking a new, delicious cookie...

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I'm for the bacon being wrapped around the fatback-filled cookie. Crispier?
Maybe if we bake-fried the shortbread cookie in bacon grease? I worked as a baker in college, but I may be out of my realm, here. I'm willing to experiment, though. Sugar, Splenda, or Stevia/mix?

Maybe like candied pigs-in-a-blanket?

Worth a shot?

When I am weaker than you, I ask you for freedom because that is according to your principles; when I am stronger than you, I take away your freedom because that is according to my principles. - Frank Herbert as Muad'dib
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post #5 of 16 (permalink) Old 12-03-2019, 01:31 AM
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Re: So, I'm thinking a new, delicious cookie...

Sugar, brown sugar, or maple syrup--no Splenda. I do like Stevia in drinks, but don't cook with it.

U R the experienced baker, your choice...
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post #6 of 16 (permalink) Old 12-03-2019, 06:43 AM
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Re: So, I'm thinking a new, delicious cookie...

I doubt the fatback jelly would be stable - they would need to be kept refrigerated. That cuts down on shipping possibilities.

I could give up chocolate but I'm not a quitter.
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post #7 of 16 (permalink) Old 12-03-2019, 08:50 AM Thread Starter
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Re: So, I'm thinking a new, delicious cookie...

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I doubt the fatback jelly would be stable - they would need to be kept refrigerated. That cuts down on shipping possibilities.
Hmm. Maybe lard. Vacuum-packed. Cheaper, too.

When I am weaker than you, I ask you for freedom because that is according to your principles; when I am stronger than you, I take away your freedom because that is according to my principles. - Frank Herbert as Muad'dib
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post #8 of 16 (permalink) Old 12-03-2019, 09:28 AM
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Re: So, I'm thinking a new, delicious cookie...

Just make the cookies with lard instead of butter. Like Southern grandmothers used to do it. Or with bacon grease if you want more bacon-y excellence, which I've done to good effect with both benne seed wafers and shortbread.

I suspect that fatback jelly would just end up being a gelatinous swath of more lard, which isn't actually all that tasty in its native form. A good sweet/savory bacon-onion jam might work though....

Or, you could stop trying to reinvent the wheel of sweet-bacon snack-y goodness and just make Glazed Bacon Crackers. Take saltine crackers, wrap individually in bacon, bake until the bacon is done enough, brush with maple syrup (or molasses or cane syrup or just toss on a handful of brown sugar) and sprinkle with a little Cajun seasoning. Put them back in the oven until they're sticky enough. Serve however many you don't eat while plating them.

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post #9 of 16 (permalink) Old 12-03-2019, 09:48 AM Thread Starter
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Re: So, I'm thinking a new, delicious cookie...

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Just make the cookies with lard instead of butter. Like Southern grandmothers used to do it. Or with bacon grease if you want more bacon-y excellence, which I've done to good effect with both benne seed wafers and shortbread.

I suspect that fatback jelly would just end up being a gelatinous swath of more lard, which isn't actually all that tasty in its native form. A good sweet/savory bacon-onion jam might work though....

Or, you could stop trying to reinvent the wheel of sweet-bacon snack-y goodness and just make Glazed Bacon Crackers. Take saltine crackers, wrap individually in bacon, bake until the bacon is done enough, brush with maple syrup (or molasses or cane syrup or just toss on a handful of brown sugar) and sprinkle with a little Cajun seasoning. Put them back in the oven until they're sticky enough. Serve however many you don't eat while plating them.
That's cool and all, but it ain't Pig Newtons.

As an aside, sugar-glazed bacon is good, but wouldn't be all that profitable. I'm thinking commercial product, which means I have to use the cheapest, crappiest ingredients I can think of. It's the American Way!

When I am weaker than you, I ask you for freedom because that is according to your principles; when I am stronger than you, I take away your freedom because that is according to my principles. - Frank Herbert as Muad'dib
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post #10 of 16 (permalink) Old 12-03-2019, 01:22 PM
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Re: So, I'm thinking a new, delicious cookie...

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Hmm. Maybe lard. Vacuum-packed. Cheaper, too.
Mmmmmm - yum. Bacon wrapped lard wrapped in a tender cookie crust and vacuum packed so the lard can't escape. How about you call them Vacuum Packed Heart Attack. That has kind of a nice ring to it, don't you think?

Although, the name Pig Newton is just so catchy.

Oh, I know! Tender cookie crust encapsulating bacon jam and a little jar of lard one can heat for dipping. Solves all the messy melting business when shipped.


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post #11 of 16 (permalink) Old 12-03-2019, 01:53 PM Thread Starter
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Re: So, I'm thinking a new, delicious cookie...

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Mmmmmm - yum. Bacon wrapped lard wrapped in a tender cookie crust and vacuum packed so the lard can't escape. How about you call them Vacuum Packed Heart Attack. That has kind of a nice ring to it, don't you think?

Although, the name Pig Newton is just so catchy.

Oh, I know! Tender cookie crust encapsulating bacon jam and a little jar of lard one can heat for dipping. Solves all the messy melting business when shipped.
Yeah, I'm sticking with Pig Newtons. But Vacuum-Packed Heart Attack? You wanna a job as Marketing Director?

When I am weaker than you, I ask you for freedom because that is according to your principles; when I am stronger than you, I take away your freedom because that is according to my principles. - Frank Herbert as Muad'dib
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post #12 of 16 (permalink) Old 12-03-2019, 04:08 PM
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Re: So, I'm thinking a new, delicious cookie...

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Yeah, I'm sticking with Pig Newtons. But Vacuum-Packed Heart Attack? You wanna a job as Marketing Director?




Sure! I come from a long line of marketing execs - remember the Edsel?

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post #13 of 16 (permalink) Old 12-03-2019, 04:45 PM Thread Starter
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Re: So, I'm thinking a new, delicious cookie...

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[/B]

Sure! I come from a long line of marketing execs - remember the Edsel?
We could promote Pig Newton recipes; Pig Newton-branded Mezcal, but with a Pig Newton instead of the worm. Promote lemon slices instead of lime for the shooters, and Boom, we got a Squealing Edsel.

When I am weaker than you, I ask you for freedom because that is according to your principles; when I am stronger than you, I take away your freedom because that is according to my principles. - Frank Herbert as Muad'dib
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post #14 of 16 (permalink) Old 12-03-2019, 05:06 PM
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Re: So, I'm thinking a new, delicious cookie...

People will try it given the name alone. It's catchy.
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post #15 of 16 (permalink) Old 12-03-2019, 05:57 PM
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Re: So, I'm thinking a new, delicious cookie...

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We could promote Pig Newton recipes; Pig Newton-branded Mezcal, but with a Pig Newton instead of the worm. Promote lemon slices instead of lime for the shooters, and Boom, we got a Squealing Edsel.
And, for the logo - I can try to get permission for the usage of an image of Porky Pig or Ned Beatty. Which do you think?

I could give up chocolate but I'm not a quitter.
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