Hi guys, Im new here. I was searching the internet for a support group such as this because I am really desperate about my wife's situation. My wife an i are married for 5 years already and during the time where we had a financial crisis. She was introduced to MLM (Multi Level Marketing) we were promised a lot including riches and financial freedom. Freedom from employment etc.. My wife took me to this seminar and sadly i was convinced and decided to quit my job and pursue this MLM. To cut to the chase things didnt go well, we were evicted from our house, I dont even have a single cent to buy a milk for my kid whos during that time was only 2 years old. and i decided that this should not happen again so i went back to the folds of employment and I asked my wife to stop engaging with those MLM folks. My work flourished and we were able to get our lives again for 2 years i worked my ass off just to get to where we are right now. Little that i know that my wife is still engaged with the MLM. 1 day she asked me if she can have money since she wants to start MLM again and she already learn from her mistakes so i went for it and gave her what she needs because i love her and even though i don't buy the idea of going back to MLM but still because my wife is so confident that we would be earning more so i went for it.Our agreement was she has to pay every penny that she borrowed from our savings soon and i noticed all of our savings is gone and i asked her about it she said she invested it with MLM and my company closed down so in short i have no work again. luckily i used to work in a call center before and i was an I.T i landed a home based job. it pays fairly well and it would suffice our daily needs but my wife who still addicted to MLM wants my whole salary to be invested. I told her we already failed and lost huge amount of money because of this and there are bills that needs to be paid and loans that you applied that i need to pay as well (the loaned money to invest yet again)I just dont know what to do with her anymore. I dont want to leave her because i love her i just want her to get out of that MLM.
Mykice
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Wife Obssessed with MLM
OMG... no advice, only to chime in. I feel for what you're going through.
I have a friend who is on her TENTH MLM scam... She has shelled out thousands of dollars to buy the "inventory kit"... only to lose her investment because she never sells a d*mn thing!!
And her husband just keeps shelling out the money to buy into the next scam.
Her "office" is a graveyard of Mary Kay, Monavie, Rodan & Fields, 31, Longaberger, Party-Lite Candles, Pampered Chef, Amway, Shaklee, and "Jewelry" products...
I have a friend who is on her TENTH MLM scam... She has shelled out thousands of dollars to buy the "inventory kit"... only to lose her investment because she never sells a d*mn thing!!
And her husband just keeps shelling out the money to buy into the next scam.
Her "office" is a graveyard of Mary Kay, Monavie, Rodan & Fields, 31, Longaberger, Party-Lite Candles, Pampered Chef, Amway, Shaklee, and "Jewelry" products...
Thanks for the reply. I am really desperate on how to get her mind out of MLM. there are times that i want strangle all her friends who encouraged her to invest. i notified my bank and told them not to entertain any more withdrawals from her. I am really fed up. with just had an argument earlier today. My salary is due to arrive tom from paypal and she wants to borrow everything so she can buy products and promised me again that she would pay it back. I just cant do that i told her. We have a lot of bills to pay loans that she applied and sadly i am the one who's paying. I dont know how long i can keep. To be honest sometimes I just dont want to see her and only then i would get some sanity.
Your wife needs help. Any therapy that helps deal with addiction can help.
You need to take control and cut her off.
Unfortunately, addictions can often destroy a marriage. Life will be unpleasant for you to stand up to her but she will destroy you and your children if you don't.
Have you told her she has a problem and needs help?
You need to take control and cut her off.
Unfortunately, addictions can often destroy a marriage. Life will be unpleasant for you to stand up to her but she will destroy you and your children if you don't.
Have you told her she has a problem and needs help?
Mykice...
Don't fall for it again! It's an endless marketing ploy, and your wife is prime for the picking of available suckers. (Sorry to be harsh, but true.)
These MLMs know JUST the personality type that will fall for "the next best thing"... sadly, your wife is in the bullseye.
Stop throwing good money after bad... you know where it gets you --> further in the hole. She will never sell the products. She will never "pay you back."
Don't fall for it again! It's an endless marketing ploy, and your wife is prime for the picking of available suckers. (Sorry to be harsh, but true.)
These MLMs know JUST the personality type that will fall for "the next best thing"... sadly, your wife is in the bullseye.
Stop throwing good money after bad... you know where it gets you --> further in the hole. She will never sell the products. She will never "pay you back."
Considering leaving my wife because of her obsession with networking
Hi all, im new here and I could surely use a good advice coming from all of you. I've been married for 5 years and sure married life has its ups and downs and sadly i am on the verge of dropping to the bottomless pit. you see my wife has this obsession about MLM (Multi Level Marketing)and i am not a big fan of this ****ing scam. my hard earned money went down the drain because my wife thinks we would get rich by doing the MLM. and she wants me to quit my job and support her instead. I want to support her but not on this endeavor. we always ended up arguing and she couldnt see what its doing to us. sadly there are times that i dont want to see her and i want to be left alone so that i could still have a bit of insanity. but today was really hard. She wants me to quit my job and give her my months paycheck so she can use it to invest and buy products. She's been doing this MLM crap for over 4 years and right now she havent gotten the results which those bastards from MLM promised that she would get if she would do the business. I am already at the brink of leaving her but i love my kids. should i wait and give her another chance maybe it would change her point of view? its destroying our relationship. Should i leave her because sometimes i think she's dragging me down. any advice would be appreciated. Thanks a lot
Hi all, im new here and I could surely use a good advice coming from all of you. I've been married for 5 years and sure married life has its ups and downs and sadly i am on the verge of dropping to the bottomless pit. you see my wife has this obsession about MLM (Multi Level Marketing)and i am not a big fan of this ****ing scam. my hard earned money went down the drain because my wife thinks we would get rich by doing the MLM. and she wants me to quit my job and support her instead. I want to support her but not on this endeavor. we always ended up arguing and she couldnt see what its doing to us. sadly there are times that i dont want to see her and i want to be left alone so that i could still have a bit of insanity. but today was really hard. She wants me to quit my job and give her my months paycheck so she can use it to invest and buy products. She's been doing this MLM crap for over 4 years and right now she havent gotten the results which those bastards from MLM promised that she would get if she would do the business. I am already at the brink of leaving her but i love my kids. should i wait and give her another chance maybe it would change her point of view? its destroying our relationship. Should i leave her because sometimes i think she's dragging me down. any advice would be appreciated. Thanks a lot
Re: Considering leaving my wife because of her obsession with networking
yeah, that's basically a pyramid scheme that gets around the law by adding in a salable item
have you tried compiling evidence and showing her how the companies are all scams?
I'd try to get a hold of a lawyer asap to see what can be done to protect yourself financially
yeah, that's basically a pyramid scheme that gets around the law by adding in a salable item
have you tried compiling evidence and showing her how the companies are all scams?
I'd try to get a hold of a lawyer asap to see what can be done to protect yourself financially
Re: Considering leaving my wife because of her obsession with networking
I’m sure to draw fire and flack for this but the whole MLM thing, notwithstanding the issue of whether or not the particular program is a Ponzi scheme, really operates on the same underlying psychological principles as a religious cult. And I say that having worked for a number of years in the investigation and prosecution of white collar crimes.
People (some) just go in deep on these schemes and literally it’d take a cult de-programmer to pull them out.
Mind you I’m not just talking about the seemingly innocuous ones, that everyone has heard about which allegedly focus on the sales and marketing of soaps and household sundries, there are MLM “programs” out there in the hundreds of thousands covering everything from consumer goods to sophisticated equity and market “investing”. The people who run these tend to pick-up, pack-up and head to a new jurisdiction every couple of years – one or two steps ahead of the law if the law ever does take an interest in whats going on.
My suggestions . . . . keep your job, guard the family money (seriously) and contact your state’s Attorney General, Consumer Financial Protection Bureau, local police department and etc.
I’m sure to draw fire and flack for this but the whole MLM thing, notwithstanding the issue of whether or not the particular program is a Ponzi scheme, really operates on the same underlying psychological principles as a religious cult. And I say that having worked for a number of years in the investigation and prosecution of white collar crimes.
People (some) just go in deep on these schemes and literally it’d take a cult de-programmer to pull them out.
Mind you I’m not just talking about the seemingly innocuous ones, that everyone has heard about which allegedly focus on the sales and marketing of soaps and household sundries, there are MLM “programs” out there in the hundreds of thousands covering everything from consumer goods to sophisticated equity and market “investing”. The people who run these tend to pick-up, pack-up and head to a new jurisdiction every couple of years – one or two steps ahead of the law if the law ever does take an interest in whats going on.
My suggestions . . . . keep your job, guard the family money (seriously) and contact your state’s Attorney General, Consumer Financial Protection Bureau, local police department and etc.
Re: Considering leaving my wife because of her obsession with networking
how i wish we have these bureau just like what you have there( I assume youre living in the US) but here in the Philippines we laws about this but implementing it is a big problem, we dont have agencies that protects consumer welfare. that's what i am planning keeping my job. I understand the fact that doing this MLM thing would definitely put my family at risk, I just wished she realize that before its too late. I dont know how to stop her addiction towards this. I dont want to affect our marriage and leave her because of this but sometimes I thought about it. would it change her view about MLM?If not are there any other ways to get her mind off that MLM thing. I love my wife but with the rate she's going I dont know if love would suffice everything. Thanks for your reply it was really helpful
Re: Considering leaving my wife because of her obsession with networking
How about this. Say no and mean it this time. If she's dragging you down then your letting her do it.
Let her know that if she wants to run her life in a ditch then she should do it on her own but not yours or the kids and say it in a way she knows that your ready to pull the rug out from under her. She ran through her money and now wants yours and it you better make your mind up because your responsible for your kids lives too and since she isn't holding up her end, then it's up to you.
If she refuses then show her the door but just remember what good it will do your kids if both of you become irresponsible. You already lost your home, isn't that enough?
How about this. Say no and mean it this time. If she's dragging you down then your letting her do it.
Let her know that if she wants to run her life in a ditch then she should do it on her own but not yours or the kids and say it in a way she knows that your ready to pull the rug out from under her. She ran through her money and now wants yours and it you better make your mind up because your responsible for your kids lives too and since she isn't holding up her end, then it's up to you.
If she refuses then show her the door but just remember what good it will do your kids if both of you become irresponsible. You already lost your home, isn't that enough?
Unless you want your kids sleeping under a bridge in the cold - STOP GIVING HER MONEY for that crap! Take her off the bank account or open a new one in only your name. Give her a pre paid card that you put money on for food or diapers...whatever your kid needs. That's it. End of story. If she wants to argue tell her to get out, get a job, and pay for her stupid investments herself.
That is insane that you keep giving her money for that!
That is insane that you keep giving her money for that!
My father who was a board certified psychiatrist/neurologist with a MS in EE to boot got into Amway with my brother who was mentally ill.
Of course it does not work.
Crazy. It's an addiction, a gambling addiction to be precise.
Good news. You can lick this.
Tell your wife that you'll divorce her if she continues. Also she has to work
Of course it does not work.
Crazy. It's an addiction, a gambling addiction to be precise.
Good news. You can lick this.
Tell your wife that you'll divorce her if she continues. Also she has to work
She is hardly unique.
You have a real chance to break this addiction but only by having zero tolerance.
Who is above her in the pyramid? Do you know him/her?
That relationship must end. Your wife must send a NC text that you write. You must see her send it from her phone and email. That person has to be blocked on Facebook.
Tell your wife that her involvement is going to destroy your marriage just as sure as alcoholism or infidelity. Look her in the eye. Say it just once.
Copy the standard divorce for poor people without lawyers papers. Fill them in and ask her to sign.
If you wife says she doesn't want a divorce, tell her you're glad to hear it. Reply: "That's great, Honey, cause I love you. You have to give up MLM."
For your part tell her that you may not be meeting all her needs but you are listening to her. Ask her what she wants from her life, her marriage. Never lose your temper. Ask Jld (a woman poster for coaching) she can help you.
You have a real chance to break this addiction but only by having zero tolerance.
Who is above her in the pyramid? Do you know him/her?
That relationship must end. Your wife must send a NC text that you write. You must see her send it from her phone and email. That person has to be blocked on Facebook.
Tell your wife that her involvement is going to destroy your marriage just as sure as alcoholism or infidelity. Look her in the eye. Say it just once.
Copy the standard divorce for poor people without lawyers papers. Fill them in and ask her to sign.
If you wife says she doesn't want a divorce, tell her you're glad to hear it. Reply: "That's great, Honey, cause I love you. You have to give up MLM."
For your part tell her that you may not be meeting all her needs but you are listening to her. Ask her what she wants from her life, her marriage. Never lose your temper. Ask Jld (a woman poster for coaching) she can help you.
Your wife doesn't have money on which to live if you divorce her. You need to set down boundaries to stop her participation.
Since you are married the debts she creates are yours to share. Tell her you are dream stealer. Do not move out of your home but file for divorce. It's a terrible step but how else can you get her to wake up?
Cutting off all her money is a good start.
Since you are married the debts she creates are yours to share. Tell her you are dream stealer. Do not move out of your home but file for divorce. It's a terrible step but how else can you get her to wake up?
Cutting off all her money is a good start.
Well since you are the one making the money, you have the power to help her stop. Giving her money and allowing her (or giving her the means) to attend these seminars is enabling.
If you don't like living with it, change it. It's going to be hard and you will have to sacrifice some and be uncomfortable sometimes. But you have to list out some boundaries and what the consequences will be if she crosses those boundaries. Do not give warnings and do not allow her to get angry with you about it.
Well, she's going to get angry, but don't engage in the arguments. Just try to walk away or go for a walk, work overtime...whatever. Start by safeguarding your money...not for her, not for you, but for those kids!!!
If you don't like living with it, change it. It's going to be hard and you will have to sacrifice some and be uncomfortable sometimes. But you have to list out some boundaries and what the consequences will be if she crosses those boundaries. Do not give warnings and do not allow her to get angry with you about it.
Well, she's going to get angry, but don't engage in the arguments. Just try to walk away or go for a walk, work overtime...whatever. Start by safeguarding your money...not for her, not for you, but for those kids!!!
Run the numbers and show her how much all that money that was spent on MLM schemes would be worth today. Show her the standard if you invested "X" amount in a IRA, mutual fund, 401k, etc... it would be worth "X" today. Explain that the initial investment would gain interest, which would then compound, then that interest would further grow along with the initial investment, then blah, blah, blah.
My point, frame investing like it's MLM! Use stupid terms like downline if that will help. Draw lines and circles if that is what she needs to see the end result. You will be wealthy if you work hard and sacrifice to save with the BIG payoff being at the end with no meetings, no chanting, no selling to your friends. You can achieve financial freedom, but not from dirtbags who have the supposed magic formula.
My point, frame investing like it's MLM! Use stupid terms like downline if that will help. Draw lines and circles if that is what she needs to see the end result. You will be wealthy if you work hard and sacrifice to save with the BIG payoff being at the end with no meetings, no chanting, no selling to your friends. You can achieve financial freedom, but not from dirtbags who have the supposed magic formula.
Have her read this excellent article from a married couple who used to be involved in MLMs. They got out when they realized how unethical and unsustainable it is...
Stay Away from MLM
Posted via Mobile Device
Stay Away from MLM
Posted via Mobile Device
Here is a link to a website (a copy) that I found in 97'-98' that I used to not only "join" my friend in his business opportunity, but I printed a lot of the content and sent to him:
AUS: Welcome
The website was shut down by scamway, but the mirrors and copies still live on for almost 20 years!! It details how prospects are coached to avoid ANYONE who is skeptical and rely on their down/up lines during these times. It is clear they prey on the weak looking for something to belong to. Thought you may want to include some or all of the site's content for your blog.
AUS: Welcome
The website was shut down by scamway, but the mirrors and copies still live on for almost 20 years!! It details how prospects are coached to avoid ANYONE who is skeptical and rely on their down/up lines during these times. It is clear they prey on the weak looking for something to belong to. Thought you may want to include some or all of the site's content for your blog.
Further, everybody's favorite Christian financial radio guru Dave Ramsey legitimizes MLM:
Guide to Joining a Multilevel Marketing Company - daveramsey.com
You know this guy, use envelopes, pay smallest debts first regardless of the interest rate, expect 12% investment returns, never buy a new car, etc...
Guide to Joining a Multilevel Marketing Company - daveramsey.com
You know this guy, use envelopes, pay smallest debts first regardless of the interest rate, expect 12% investment returns, never buy a new car, etc...
At the bottom of this issue is personal and financial boundaries, therefore I recommend the book Boundaries by Cloud and Townsend. That needs rebalancing.
I think it may help you navigate this by shifting perspective to treating it as if it is an addiction and her as an addict. Groups like Al-Anon and ACOA , and books like Codependent No More will give you answers on how best to navigate people you love who have addictions. There are other books out there, especially Boundaries books and the book Emotional Blackmail.
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Does she go to church? If so, get your priest, pastor whatever involved. Church's hate to see anyone else getting your money.
and oh by the way to you guys who's in the USA, Europe and Canada they are currently expanding and they already have offices all across the east coast and west coast. just a heads up maybe one of your friends or even your husband or wife might get hooked with them
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